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dumbkiri · 11 days ago

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𝐂𝐋𝐎𝐀𝐊 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐒 3

χα∂єη яισяѕση χ ƒ! мαιяι! яєα∂єя

ρℓσт: Training. RSC. Bodhi. Xaden. Can anything get worse than the future you see for yourself? The dream of falling out of the dark sky with a shrill roar of heartbreak? No, you think your fate is sealed in stone.

(slight Bodhi bc ngl im feeling this sweet goober)

PART THREE

TW: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE

Training Violet wasn’t so bad after all.

However she did talk too much, always reciting some story, the Codex or a book to keep herself motivated. You could never get her to close her mouth these past days. She asked too many questions about your signet and this time, you chucked your dagger into the tree she was kicking to get her to shut up.

“Seriously, Sorrengail,” Your shoulders dropped in defeat, yet tone laced with a threat “If I have to hear another word come out of your mouth instead of a grunt, I will cut your tongue out.”

Violet’s eyes turned away from you and she went back to kicking the tree. Good, she is smart after all.

“Tairn told me that Sgaeyl watched you kill six people during your Threshing.”

You don’t see what Xaden sees in her. Everyone goes off about how smart Violet is, but here she stands testing your patience. Perhaps the feeling of a new person stirred something inside of him. The excitement of sneaking around and-

“She said that if Xaden never existed, she would have chosen you.”

“Then it’s a good thing he does,” You grumbled, your face falling into your hands. Damn it, if she doesn’t understand your story or relationship with Xaden she’s just going to keep talking.

“Come join me over here,” You tear your hands from your face and gesture to the spot in front of the boulder you sat on.

Violet, slightly limping from the extensive exercise, made her way over to you and sat on the dirt ground across from you.

“Since you cannot focus on your training, ask me only three questions,” You leaned back on your palms and looked at her expectantly.

“Why did you kill those people? Were you fighting them to have Lenin claim you?”

You narrowed your eyes at the ground and shook your head, “No.” Then you looked back at her, “These people were bullies, picture Jack Barlowe cloned six times and have them band up together. That is the type of group that targeted me. Although it was a woman that led the group and her name was Lara, she is the seventh. Lenin killed her and I swear, I can hear her pleas and the way her body crunched in his mouth.”

Violet, appalled by your description leaned in, “Lenin didn’t burn her? Tairn burned-”

“Nah, Lenin saw my memories and knew about all the pain she put me through. He wanted her to suffer and I’m telling you it was a very scary situation.” You huffed out a laugh without humor.

“We were surrounded by a dense fog, you could barely see five feet in front of you. I just got done killing the sixth when Lara froze up. I thought maybe she couldn’t believe that I killed all her friends. Hell I barely remember killing them, it was like I was possessed.”

Again, you can feel the rain wash the blood from your enemies tainted on your body. You spun your dagger with your middle finger remembering the feeling so well. Like it happened yesterday. Your heart pounded against your chest, the breath that left your lips vaporized, your muscles forced you to move on to your next target.

You cleared your throat and said, “When I finally moved to her, having the itch to drive my dagger into her heart that is when I felt that tugging Professor Kaori informed us about. Then I heard his voice way before his tail came in, swiping her from under the floor. Can you imagine it? Having Tairn hide in the dark fog, his deep voice rumbling in your head?”

Violet nodded her head, “I think I can, but he says his son is very attached to you. It’s why Lenin showed no mercy to that Lara woman.”

You smile back at her, “Because I’m his first rider. I’m sure Sgaeyl and Tairn have told Lenin about their previous riders. That the death of a rider isn’t improbable. So Lenin is attached to my hip, and he’s still young. We got a special bond going on. He makes me stronger.”

“My cloak and dagger,” Lenin hummed with gratification, his feelings drowning you through the bond. You swear he felt a strong desire to protect you. Not wanting to give you a Rider’s death. One of pain and suffering. Lenin does not want to almost die like his father because of a rider.

“You will not die.” Lenin ordered.

“Are you and Xaden dating?”

What a weird question to ask. It’s almost fucked up to ask. Xaden hasn’t spared time for you and she wants to ask if you’re dating him? She should know Xaden is wrapped around her finger and yep, you’re starting to hate the both of them for their audacity. Xaden’s jealousy and Violet’s insensitive question got you riled up. This honestly pissed you off and you didn’t hold back questioning Tairn’s decision for this girl.

“Lenin, can you ask your dad if he really chose her for her intelligence?”

“I wouldn’t answer her question, Dagger,” Lenin said, “Almost seems like a trap.”

You take his words into consideration. How would this be a trap? If you said the truth, which is no, would she go on pursuing Xaden? Not that it matters anymore. You lost Xaden to her. Watching them together made you feel blue. Out with the old and in with the new.

You shook your head and sighed, “Dating didn’t seem problematic for us. We might as well have been with the amount of times we’ve slept together.”

Suddenly his scars came to mind the moment you thought about him. The pain he burdened himself to keep all the children alive. Violet’s mother, the one who made him go through that, showed no mercy to him. He paid the price of mercy, you reminded yourself and your heart grew heavy with the reminder.

How can he look at Violet and think she’s the one for him. Especially after what her mother did to him.

“You asked three questions,” You pointed at her tree, “Now go back to kicking.”

Violet looked at you like she wanted to say more, yet she held her tongue for once. Then she started kicking the tree with her right leg. She couldn’t get your words out of her head, and she asked with heavy breaths, “What do you mean by ‘dating didn’t seem problematic’? Why didn’t you guys-”

When she turned back around to direct the last bit of her question to you, you were gone.

“[Name]?” She called out into the silent day.

……

“Well this is probably the worst group I’d want to be in,” You muttered under your breath, sitting across from Dain. He gave you a look that said he’d rather be kidnapped with someone else too. You’d forgotten about the whole kidnapping part in the RSC.

Then he straightened out his back, trying to size you up it seemed. Dain spoke with slight annoyance, focusing on how close you and Imogen stuck to one another, “We have to work together, and believe me. If I had a choice, I would be stuck with another group.”

“Since you’re Colonel Aetos’ son couldn’t you, I don’t know,” You waved your hand lazily, “Get your way with a group for RSC?”

“I like to do things by the rules, Mairi,” Dain huffed.

You laughed with your shoulders, “Oh yeah, I forgot about you and your rules. God, no wonder Violet moved on to Xaden. Your girl just stole my man because you couldn’t keep a tight leash on her.”

“Maybe it was you,” Dain bit back, not liking how you pulled Violet into the conversation, “Aren’t you two supposed to be endgame? Xaden had no problem flaunting you like a trophy, but like every trophy…they’re left on the shelf. To be looked at as a memory of the past.”

You shook your head and said unbothered, “Ouch. Although I’m glad you described me as a trophy, it’s better than a rebound. Or gum stuck under someone’s boot.”

“You’re starting to piss me off, [Name],” Dain spat as he rose from his seat.

You stood up to meet him halfway, “Oh no, did I break a rule doing so? Hurt your fragile ego?” You reached for your dagger at your hip and forgot that you’ve been unarmed. Well that ruined your threatening nature because Dain’s frustrated look turned into a smirk as he looked down at you.

“Listen, we need to share our secrets with one another,” Pam said, growing tired of the back and forth between you and Dain, “ I also feel like there’s some sexual tension you’re sharing with one another.”

Appalled, you and Dain reeled back in utter disgust.

“Fuck no.”

“Hell no.”

Pam laughed and shrugged her shoulders, “Your responses are close enough too. It’s not wrong for the both of you to get together especially after being replaced.”

“She’s right,” Imogen crossed her arms over her chest and when she saw the hurt on your face, she corrected herself, “we need to focus on the secret part. Mine is I’ve slept with [Name] twice before her relationship with Xaden was even a thing.”

“Imogen!” You shouted, pink tinting your face, “That is like the ultimate secret! It’s supposed to stick with us. Now they know!”

She shrugged her shoulders and said, “That's the whole point of this RSC training, woman. I didn’t describe our situation and-“

“Can I use the same secret?” You asked, interrupting her so she really wouldn’t say anything else and Dain shook his head.

“Nice try.”

Rolling your eyes, you thought hard about a secret. You really didn’t have any. Besides Xaden and the rebellion…revolution. Fuck, do you know if it’ll be fine to say your signet is stronger?

“[Name], what’s yours?” Pam asked. You must have missed hers and Dain’s when you were thinking of one.

You looked at Imogen then back to Dain. Yep, you were really doing this.

“I can cloak more than two people.”

“What.” Pam and Dain stared at you incredulously.

“I can cloak more than two people,” You reiterated.

“[Name], that’s…amazing! You can-“

“It’s dangerous,” Dain cut in, his eyes narrowed with a threat. You knew what he was implying. You can cloak three or more Marked people without the chance of getting caught. You have done so many times. Not that he needs this information.

Now he could ruin everything by telling his dad this shit. You put yourself and everyone else in danger with this secret out.

“Look,” You said with a grim smile, “If anything it allows us to escape this RSC exercise. We can be the first group to achieve this.”

You tried to make things better for you. Keyword: tried. The way you caught Imogen giving you a hard stare implied that she really wasn’t happy about you spilling this secret.

“You’re right!” Pam jumped up from her seat and said, “Your cloak will trick the interrogators when they come back in! We can just hang in the back and wait.”

Without a word, your cloak moved over them and they shuddered in the cold. You wanted to get this thing over with, as fast as you can so Imogen could wipe their memory.

“I’m sorry, it’s a new feeling, but you’ll get used to it.”

“I can’t believe you can do this,” Dain whispered, entranced by the darkness that covered him.

“I only started doing this when Professor Kaori caught Bodhi and I-” You shook your head and said, “Professor Kaori told me I should work on my signet because it’s unique. So I did, not everyone knows I can do this. It’s why it's a secret, a really huge one.”

“I don’t understand why you’d keep it a secret,” Dain muttered, “With you being a Marked one-”

“Aetos, shut your mouth,” You whispered and the door to the classroom opened up.

Show time.

……

“Bodhi, I messed up.”

Your eyes skimmed over the bruises on his muscled arms in deep thought over the consequences that may follow you. This is how you should have come out of RSC two days ago. Or at least one of your group members.

Recovering from bruises and a rough interrogation. Instead your group walked out because of your signet, easy as pie. No bruises, not cuts or fractured bones. You guys walked out of the room under your cloak. Being invisible to the eye really worked wonders.

The patch on your flight jacket didn’t even bring joy to you. You earned it at what cost…

“How so?” He hummed while resting his head back onto your pillow. He stared at you with his crown of black curls framing his handsome face. God, those eyes melted your worries away until you remember the hardened ones that belonged to Dain.

You were in deep shit. Shit you couldn’t swim your way out of even if you did have help. No one wants to help someone who literally dug their own grave.

With Bodhi’s knees bent, you leaned over them with your arms crossed on top of them.

You didn’t dare look back into his eyes, afraid of the initial reaction. You can barely stand the one Imogen gives you now.

She didn’t outwardly tell you, but you knew she had to tell Xaden. To warn him and the others that your signet is out. You’re going to be monitored by all the professors and more importantly, Dain.

“I told Dain Aetos that I can cloak multiple people as my secret for the interrogation.”

“Oh.”

Great. You pulled away from him, but he was quick to catch your hands in his. And he tugged you down to him, “You didn’t let me finish.”

“What is there to say? I fucked up and when Xaden catches wind of this…I’m utterly screwed.” You tried one more time to pull away from him, yet his arms circled around your waist with gentle care.

“Please listen to what I have to say then you can wallow about the future.”

“If I have one,” You muttered, rolling your eyes. This made him chuckle and lift you a little higher to his face. Your head rested on his chest and he began playing with the strands of your hair.

“We know, everyone knows that you told Dain this. Do I think telling the guy who can search through memories that you can cloak multiple people is a good idea…no.” He said flatly, his fingers running through your hair.

“But do I think your mind is a strong force to penetrate, yes. Why do you think Xaden spent all his time questioning you, he can never read you. Yet he reads the rest of us like open books. Our shields mean jack shit to him. My point is; Xaden isn’t worried about you spilling anything because he trusts that fortress inside your head too much. We all do.”

“Bodhi, that is the literal point,” You worriedly argued, “I’m going to be questioned and have my memories searched. Just because Xaden can't "read" my mind like he does you- do you really think I’m safe within these walls now that my signet is-”

You started to worry about the truth of your signet. You can move objects now. If Dain finds out about this-

“They don’t know your signet, [Name],” Bodhi reassured, “They don’t realize the real strength you have. You still have a dagger up your sleeve. You just told Dain the easiest part of your signet.”

He moved his hand down to your shoulder and rubbed up and down your arm. He shared his warmth with you and you can feel sleep gradually whisk you away as time went on in the silence. His relaxed breathing lulled you to sleep as you both got comfortable on your bed.

Tomorrow you will think more about the consequences. Right now, you will happily enjoy Bodhi’s gentle company.

……

“Liam, listen to me!” You begged, grabbing onto his hand.

“No, you listen,” Liam shouted back, his blue eyes glaring into your soul, “I’m sorry, alright? I haven’t spent any time with you and I’m sorry. But you know how important it is to keep Violet alive! I’m doing a favor for everyone and I’m sorry you can’t get past the hatred you have towards her. It’s not my fault Xaden forgot you! It’s not my fault Violet is easier to be around with!”

Shattered.

Your brother heaved as he focused on his breathing, to get all the air he let out into yelling at you. Deigh’s throat rumbled in dissatisfaction, looming over Liam and you paid no attention to the dragon that wanted to claim you before Lenin got to you.

Although Deigh must have said something to your brother, the way his eyes softened at your desperate expression forced himself to calm down.

“[Name], those last parts- I didn’t mean…” His words drowned out in the back of his throat because the look you gave him broke his heart.

“I just want you to save yourself,” You whispered, then your hands pushed against his sturdy chest. The anger in you boiled inside and you had to let it out, let it out, “but if you want to die then do it! Kill yourself and leave Sloane to deal with me! You’d leave her alone with the worst older sibling, is that what you want? To have our baby sister hate Violet, your precious best friend! To have Sloane deal with me!”

“I want them to live!”

“And I want you to live!” You countered back.

Liam sighed heavily, burdened by the choice of his sisters or everyone’s fate, “We all can’t get what we want. Whatever ends up happening, I will still be your brother. You should know that I love you and Sloane and I will do anything to come back to you guys.”

“This isn’t just for love,” You stressed the words in your sentence, “This more than that. Losing you, I-I cannot let that happen.”

Liam enveloped you into his hug, he felt like nothing.

“I’ll be safe, I won’t do anything reckless.”

……

The moon never looked so pretty. You always looked at it with privilege and now you enjoyed the graceful light. It stared at you, enveloped you in a chill that allowed you to accept your fate.

Because if Liam can sacrifice himself for Violet, why can’t you make the same sacrifice for him?

You fell in what felt like slow motion as you kept your eyes on the moon. Liam was right. Sloane would be better off with him alive and mourning you. She needed him more than you, the bitter sister of the Mairi Family.

“Hold on, Dagger!”

No, you didn’t want to. You’re too far gone. The edges of your vision darkened, but the moon still kept its beautiful glow on you as it watched you fall. What a beautiful sight to close your eyes to. The last image of your ending.

Then your ears hurt at the sound of a piercing cry of a weak roar. One that begged you to keep your eyes open. One that said, don’t leave me.

............................

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