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lila-lou · 2 months ago

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✨His true fate - Part 39/?✨

Summary: Jensen hasn't been happy for years. But it seems almost impossible for him to escape. After another nasty argument between him and his wife, he decides to visit his ´former´ best friend for his birthday. Back in Austin, an encounter awaits him that will turn his life completely upside down.

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, Language, age gap, Fluff, ANGST

Word Count: 8726

A/N: English isn’t my first language, so please be lenient. 💙✨

You sat in the waiting room, the faint sounds of the sterile clinic buzzing around you as you focused on keeping the rice you’d eaten from churning in your stomach. You’d managed to eat nearly half, which felt like a small victory given the days of nausea and exhaustion. Jensen had been quiet on the drive back to the doctor’s office, his expression unreadable, but his knuckles had been white as he gripped the steering wheel.

Now, as you sat waiting for him to come back, the faint murmurs of conversation in the hallway suddenly turned into something much louder.

“How’s that fucking possible?!”, Jensen’s voice echoed down the hall, loud and sharp, breaking through the muffled sounds. Despite the distance and the closed doors, you could hear every word as his voice grew angrier. “What’s the fucking point of a fucking vasectomy if they can fucking grow back together?!”.

Your heart raced at his words, and you leaned forward in your chair, your hands gripping your knees tightly. The realization hit you like a shockwave, sending your thoughts spinning. The impossible had just been explained—his vasectomy hadn’t been as permanent as either of you had believed.

“Mr. Ackles, please calm down”, a calmer, more measured voice replied, likely the doctor’s. “It’s extremely rare, but it does happen. Over time, the vas deferens can reconnect in a process called recanalization. It’s not common, but it’s not unheard of either”.

Jensen’s voice, filled with frustration and disbelief, broke through again. “So what the hell am I supposed to do with that information now? You said this was permanent! You said it was fucking foolproof!”.

The doctor’s response was quieter this time, the tone harder to make out, but it didn’t seem to calm Jensen. You sat frozen in your seat, your mind racing as you processed what you’d just heard.

The muffled tones of the conversation down the hall continued, quieter now but still carrying the weight of Jensen’s frustration. You strained to hear, your breath shallow as you tried to piece together the dialogue.

“Mr. Ackles”, the doctor said firmly, though his tone remained professional. “I understand this is frustrating and unexpected, but medical procedures, especially vasectomies, are not always foolproof. The recanalization process is rare, yes, but it does happen. There’s a reason we recommend regular follow-ups for cases like yours”.

Jensen’s voice, though quieter, still carried a sharp edge. “I had this done years ago. You’re telling me that for almost a decade, I’ve been walking around thinking it was impossible—thinking my life was set—and now I’m finding out it wasn’t?”.

The doctor paused for a moment, likely trying to gauge Jensen’s mood. “I understand that this is a lot to process. But I can assure you that this phenomenon isn’t due to negligence. It’s just biology—something we can’t always predict”.

Jensen let out a bitter laugh, one that carried no humor. “Biology”, he repeated, his tone dripping with disbelief.

You heard footsteps, faint but steady, followed by the door creaking open and Jensen stepping into the waiting room. His face was pale, his jaw clenched tightly, but his eyes found yours immediately. He didn’t say a word, just gestured for you to follow him, his hand rubbing the back of his neck as he turned and walked toward the exit.

Back in the car, the silence was thick, almost unbearable. Jensen’s hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles white, as he stared out at the road ahead. He hadn’t said a word since leaving the doctor’s office, and the tension radiating off him was palpable. You sat quietly beside him, biting your lip nervously, your hands twisting together in your lap.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Jensen broke the silence, his voice low and gruff. “My fucking boys are stronger than ever”, he muttered, the words carrying a mix of disbelief and frustration. He glanced sideways at you briefly, then back at the road. “And you’re obviously way too fucking fertile with your mid-twenties”.

The bluntness of his words caught you off guard, and you blinked, unsure whether to laugh or cry. “Jensen”, you started softly, but he cut you off with a shake of his head.

“No, really”, he continued, his voice tinged with bitter humor. “I go through a whole procedure to shut this factory down, thinking it’s a done deal, and here we are. Turns out, it’s a goddamn superpower. Meanwhile, you…”. He trailed off, exhaling sharply, his fingers tightening on the wheel again. “You’re practically a walking miracle of fertility”.

You bit back a retort, realizing his frustration wasn’t entirely directed at you. Instead, it was the situation—the improbability of it all. “I don’t know what to say”, you admitted, your voice soft. “I didn’t plan this. I didn’t even think it was possible. But here we are”.

“Yeah”, he said, his voice heavy with sarcasm. “Here we are”.

Jensen let out a heavy sigh, squeezing his eyes shut as his head dropped back against the seat. He ran a hand over his face, pressing his palm against his eyes like he was trying to block out the weight of it all.

“I don’t want another kid”, he muttered, his voice filled with exhaustion and frustration. “Hell, I’ve changed so many fucking diapers in my life, I swear I can still smell baby shit whenever I see a goddamn package of Pampers”. He let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “I’m too old for this. Midnight feedings, teething, potty training—Jesus. I thought I was done”.

His words, though laced with genuine frustration, struck a chord of absurdity that you couldn’t ignore. Despite everything—the tension, the hurt, the impossibility of the situation—you felt a small laugh bubble up, unbidden. It started as a quiet chuckle, but it grew louder before you could stop it.

Jensen’s head snapped toward you, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “Are you laughing right now?”, he asked, incredulous.

You covered your mouth with your hand, trying to stifle the sound, but it was no use. “I’m sorry”, you managed to say between giggles.

Your laughter only grew, the sound bubbling out of you uncontrollably as you tried to cover your face with your hands. It wasn’t that the situation wasn’t serious—it was. But it was also so absurd, so completely out of left field, that you couldn’t decide whether you wanted to laugh or cry. And right now, laughing felt like the only option that didn’t make you feel like you were falling apart.

Jensen stared at you, his brows furrowed, his mouth opening like he was about to say something. But instead, he just shook his head, leaning back against the seat with a look of utter bewilderment.

“You’ve lost it”, he muttered, though the corners of his lips twitched ever so slightly. “You’ve completely lost it”.

“I have”, you admitted through another bout of giggles, your stomach starting to ache from the force of it. “But can you blame me? Jensen, we’re sitting here talking about Pampers and teething while I’m trying to figure out how this even happened”.

Jensen let out a heavy sigh, but this time there was the faintest hint of a chuckle buried in it. “It’s like a bad sitcom”, he muttered, his voice low and almost amused.

Jensen let you have your laugh, his jaw tightening as he worked to keep his own emotions in check. The absurdity of the situation wasn’t lost on him, and for a moment, he wanted to let the humor in, to find some kind of release in it. But the weight of everything—this new reality, the uncertainty, the massive shift in both of your lives—kept pulling him back down.

He glanced at you again, your laughter finally beginning to fade as you wiped tears from your cheeks. There was something in your expression, a mixture of disbelief and vulnerability, that made him hesitate. He had a question on the tip of his tongue, one he wasn’t sure how to ask. One he wasn’t sure he even wanted to know the answer to.

Do you even want to keep it?

But as he stared at you, the words stuck in his throat. He knew your heart—knew it better than anyone. And he knew the answer before he even asked. You could never get rid of a baby, not with the way you cared so deeply about everything and everyone. That compassion, that openness, was part of what had drawn him to you in the first place. And he knew this decision wasn’t something you’d ever take lightly.

Jensen sighed, leaning forward slightly and resting his forearms on the steering wheel. “I guess there’s no point in asking if you want to… you know”, he said quietly, his voice laced with hesitation. “Because I think we both know where you stand on that”.

Your laughter had fully subsided now, replaced by a quiet, serious expression. You turned to look at him, your eyes soft but resolute. “I don’t think I could, Jensen”, you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t think I could live with myself if I… if we didn’t keep it”.

He nodded slowly, letting out a deep breath as he absorbed your words. “Yeah”, he murmured, his voice low and rough. “Yeah, I figured”.

You hesitated, your voice trembling as you forced out the words that had been weighing on you. “But if you don’t want to have anything to do with it, Jensen… I…”. You swallowed hard, your fingers twisting in your lap. “I can do it on my own. You wouldn’t even need to pay or—”.

“Stop”, Jensen interrupted, cutting you off before you could finish. His voice was firm but not harsh, a mix of seriousness and something else—a protective edge that made you pause. He turned his head to look at you, his green eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath hitch.

“You really think I’d let you do this alone?”, he asked, his tone shifting, a small, wry grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. “What, you think I’m gonna be the deadbeat dad in this scenario? Leave you to handle all that baby shit while I just walk away?”.

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden change in his tone. “I didn’t mean—”.

“Yeah, yeah”, he interrupted again, this time more playfully, though his voice still carried an undercurrent of sincerity. “But come on. I’m too good-looking and way too stubborn to let my kid grow up without knowing how awesome their dad is”.

A laugh escaped you, soft and unexpected, as the tension in your chest loosened just a little. Jensen’s grin widened, though his expression softened as he reached over to take your hand in his, his touch warm and grounding.

“Listen to me”, he said, his voice dropping to a more serious tone. “I’m scared, okay? I’m overwhelmed, and this wasn’t part of the plan, but I’m not going anywhere. Not now, not ever. We’re in this together, whether it’s messy or terrifying or whatever else comes our way. Got it?”.

Tears welled in your eyes again, but this time, they weren’t from fear or doubt. They were from the overwhelming relief of hearing him say what you hadn’t even realized you needed to hear. You nodded, your fingers tightening around his.

“Got it”, you whispered, your voice shaky but full of emotion.

Jensen nodded back, his lips twitching into a softer smile. “Good”, he said, leaning back slightly. “Now, can we stop talking about me abandoning you and start focusing on how we’re gonna survive without sleep for the next few years?”.

You laughed again, this time a little louder, the sound easing the last of the tension between you. For the first time in what felt like forever, the weight didn’t feel quite as heavy. Jensen squeezed your hand gently, his touch a quiet reassurance that, no matter what, you weren’t in this alone.

That evening, you found yourself curled up in Jensen’s arms, your head resting against his chest as the steady rhythm of his heartbeat lulled you into a fragile sense of calm. The weight of the day, the emotional turmoil, and the exhaustion had caught up with you, and sleep came easier than you expected. Despite everything, Jensen’s presence felt grounding, his arms holding you close as if to shield you from the chaos of the world outside.

Jensen, however, was far from calm. His phone was pressed to his ear, his voice low and steady but with an edge of impatience as he spoke to his manager. “I’ve told you already”, he said firmly. “I don’t care if it’s bad for PR or whatever bullshit excuse you have. I’m not dragging this out any longer. The moment the 90 days are up, it’s done”.

There was a pause as the muffled voice on the other end of the call responded, their tone clearly disapproving. Jensen’s jaw tightened, and you stirred slightly in his arms, though he softened his grip to avoid waking you fully.

“I don’t need to hear how this will ‘look’”, Jensen shot back, his voice quiet but sharp. “What’s done is done. My life is not a goddamn storyline for a press release. I’m divorcing Danneel, officially, legally, and completely. That’s it”.

His manager’s voice grew more insistent, and Jensen pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a heavy sigh. “You don’t have to like it”, he said, his tone tinged with frustration. “You just have to make it happen. Handle the logistics, the lawyers, the papers—whatever it takes. But this is not negotiable”.

You shifted again, murmuring softly in your sleep, and Jensen’s expression softened immediately. His hand moved to brush a few strands of hair from your face, his thumb tracing your cheek gently. For a moment, he let the phone rest against his shoulder, taking a deep breath before bringing it back to his ear.

“I’ve got more important things to focus on”, he said firmly, his voice calmer now but no less resolute. “You’ll get the details tomorrow. Goodnight".

He ended the call without waiting for a response, setting the phone aside and letting out another sigh. His gaze fell to you, sleeping peacefully in his arms despite the whirlwind around you both. Jensen’s lips pressed into a thin line as he leaned down to kiss the top of your head.

Jensen stayed awake long after you had drifted into the deep, rhythmic breathing of sleep. His arms were still around you, your body relaxed against his chest, but his mind was far from at ease. He stared down at you, his gaze tracing the soft lines of your face, the peaceful rise and fall of your breath. The thought of leaving you tomorrow to fly back to LA for work made his chest tighten uncomfortably. It wasn’t just the distance—it was the unresolved tension, the enormity of what you were both now facing.

His eyes dropped to your belly, still flat but carrying a weight he hadn’t fully come to terms with. The reality of your pregnancy hadn’t completely settled in yet, like an abstract concept he couldn’t quite grasp. He sighed deeply, his head tipping back against the couch as he muttered, “Fuck”.

The word carried all the weight of his conflicting emotions. He didn’t doubt the love he felt for you. But this was… overwhelming. He had spent years thinking that chapter of his life was over. No more kids, no more diapers, no more sleepless nights. And yet, here he was, facing the exact opposite of what he thought his life would look like.

Jensen’s hand rested lightly against your back, his thumb brushing small circles there. His mind raced with questions he couldn’t yet answer. Would he be enough for you? For the baby? Could he balance the demands of his career with the responsibilities of being a father again? And how the hell was he supposed to leave you tomorrow when everything between you felt so fragile?

He closed his eyes briefly, letting out another soft curse under his breath. His fingers brushed through your hair gently, his touch more for himself than for you, grounding him in the moment.

Jensen carefully scooped you up from the couch, cradling you against his chest as he made his way toward the bedroom. He moved slowly, trying not to disturb you, but midway through the journey, your eyes fluttered open, your sleepy gaze meeting his.

"Carrying me to bed now, huh? Thought you weren’t into heavy lifting these days", you teased softly, your voice thick with exhaustion but laced with humor.

Jensen smirked, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he adjusted his hold on you. “Well, gotta get used to it, don’t I? If this keeps up, I’ll be lugging around more than just you soon. Stroller, diaper bag, car seat—oh, and a screaming baby”.

The words tumbled out before he could stop them, and for a moment, both of you froze. His eyes widened slightly, as though realizing the joke had come from him, while you blinked up at him in surprise. Then, despite the lingering tension between you, a small laugh escaped your lips.

“Did you… just make a baby joke?”, you asked, your tired expression softening with amusement.

Jensen let out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head as he pushed the bedroom door open with his foot. “Guess I did”, he muttered, his tone still tinged with disbelief. He laid you down gently on the bed, his hands lingering at your sides as he looked down at you. “Doesn’t mean I’m not still freaking out".

You reached up, brushing your fingers lightly over his arm. “You and me both”, you admitted, your voice softer now. “But I’m glad you’re here”.

The next morning brought a surprising sense of calm. For the first time in what felt like days, your stomach wasn’t in turmoil, the nausea that had plagued you finally easing up. You woke up feeling somewhat okay—a small mercy in the whirlwind your life had become. The room was quiet except for Jensen’s soft, steady breathing beside you. He was still deeply asleep, his features relaxed in a way you hadn’t seen in a while. It seemed he, too, had finally found some rest.

You smiled faintly, the sight of him easing a knot of tension you didn’t even realize you’d been holding. Carefully, you pushed yourself closer, not wanting to wake him just yet. Swinging one leg over his lap, you tucked yourself against him, your arm tightening across his chest as you let your head rest near his shoulder. His warmth and the solid, steady rhythm of his heartbeat were comforting, grounding you in a way nothing else could.

Jensen stirred slightly at the movement, his arms instinctively wrapping around you even as he remained half-asleep. His hand settled on your back, pulling you closer, and he let out a soft, content sigh. You couldn’t help but smile at the way he instinctively sought you out, even in his sleep.

For a moment, you stayed like that, simply savoring the quiet intimacy. The weight of the past few days didn’t feel so heavy right now, and for the first time in a while, you allowed yourself to just breathe. You tilted your head slightly, brushing your lips against the side of his neck in a featherlight kiss.

“Morning”, you whispered softly, even though you weren’t sure if he was awake enough to hear you.

He groaned lightly in response, his voice thick with sleep. “Mmm… not yet”, he mumbled, his hand tightening slightly on your back. “Five more minutes”.

You chuckled quietly, your fingers tracing lazy patterns on his chest. “You’re the one who has to catch a flight”, you teased gently.

Jensen let out another groan, this one more exaggerated, as he buried his face in your hair. “Don’t remind me”, he muttered, his voice muffled. “Just let me stay here a little longer”.

His words made your chest ache in the best way, and you held onto him a little tighter, wishing you could freeze this moment and keep him here with you forever.

Your fingers moved slowly over Jensen’s bare chest, tracing the faint freckles scattered across his skin. Each movement was deliberate, soothing, as though you were trying to memorize every detail. The room wasn’t quiet like it used to be before the picture, before the pregnancy, before all the tension and doubt. But in this moment, none of that mattered. Right now, there was just the two of you, tangled together in the soft morning light.

You allowed yourself to feel it—the deep, overwhelming love you had for him. It hurt, but you let it in anyway. You let it fill your chest, even if just for this fleeting moment of peace. Your heart ached in the way it always did when you thought about how much he meant to you, about how much you wanted this—all of it—to work.

Jensen’s arm tightened slightly around you, his fingers brushing lazily against your side as he stirred a little more. “You’re quiet”, he mumbled, his voice still rough with sleep. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”.

You hesitated for a moment, your fingers pausing on his chest before resuming their gentle patterns. “Just… thinking”, you admitted softly. “About everything. About us”.

He tilted his head slightly to look at you, his green eyes still heavy-lidded but attentive. “And?”, he prompted, his voice softer now.

You swallowed, your fingers tracing over a particularly faint freckle as you gathered your thoughts. “And I just… I don’t want to lose this”, you said quietly, your voice trembling slightly. “Even with everything that’s happened, with everything we’ve been through… I don’t want to lose what we have, Jensen”.

His gaze softened, and he shifted slightly to pull you closer, his lips brushing against your forehead in a tender kiss. “You’re not going to lose me”, he murmured, his voice steady and sure.

Your chest tightened as Jensen’s words settled over you. The emotion was too much to contain, and before you could stop it, a single sob escaped your lips. You bit down hard, willing yourself not to cry, your eyes welling up despite your efforts. You didn’t want to ruin the moment, didn’t want to bring the weight of everything crashing back down, but it was impossible to hold it all in.

Jensen felt the shift instantly. His hand moved from your side to gently cup your face, his thumb brushing against your cheek as he turned toward you. “Hey”, he said softly, his voice tinged with concern. “Look at me”.

You shook your head, your gaze fixed on a spot on his chest, anywhere but his eyes. “I’m fine”, you mumbled, though your trembling voice betrayed the truth.

“(Y/N)”, he whispered, his tone both tender and insistent. “Don’t do that. Don’t shut me out. Please, just look at me”.

Reluctantly, you turned your head, your teary eyes meeting his. His expression softened further as he took you in, the vulnerability in your face making his heart ache. He brushed a stray tear from your cheek, his green eyes steady and full of emotion.

“Talk to me”, he urged gently.

“I’m sorry for the…”, Your voice faltered as you tried to find the words, your hand hovering over your belly before gesturing vaguely. The word felt too heavy, too final, and you couldn’t bring yourself to say it. Instead, you looked away, your gaze dropping to the blanket tangled around your legs.

Jensen’s expression softened, his hand still gently cupping your face. “Don’t”, he said quietly, his thumb brushing against your cheek again. “Don’t apologize for that”.

Your lip trembled, and you shook your head slightly. “I know how much you didn’t want this”, you whispered. “I know how hard it is for you to even think about having another one. And I just… I didn’t mean for this to happen, Jensen”.

His hand dropped from your face to rest over yours, his palm warm against your trembling fingers. He let out a long, slow breath, as if gathering his thoughts. “I won’t lie to you”. he said, his voice steady but laced with emotion. “It scared the hell out of me at first. Still does. But you didn’t do this alone. It’s not just you, okay? It’s us. And we’ll figure it out together”.

You blinked up at him, the sincerity in his words catching you off guard. “But you said—”.

“I know what I said”, he interrupted gently. “And yeah, I didn’t plan for this. I wasn’t ready for it. But now it’s here. And you know what? I’ve been scared before. Hell, I’ve been terrified. But I’ve never backed down from something that mattered. And you matter".

Tears slipped down your cheeks as his words sank in, the weight in your chest easing slightly. “You mean that?”, you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Jensen nodded, his green eyes locked on yours. “I mean it”, he said firmly.

You let out a shaky breath, your hands gripping his as you leaned into him, finding solace in his presence. “Thank you”, you whispered, the words trembling but heartfelt.

He pressed a kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering for a moment before he pulled back just enough to meet your eyes. “We’ve got this”, he said, his voice steady and sure. And for the first time in days, you believed him.

Jensen’s lips moved gently, his kisses soft and deliberate, starting at your temple and traveling down your jaw. Each touch of his lips was warm and unhurried, a silent reassurance that he was here, that he wasn’t letting go. Between each kiss, he paused to press a lingering peck to your lips, his hand still cupping your face as if he couldn’t bear to let you go completely.

When he reached your neck, his kisses slowed, his lips grazing the sensitive skin there, drawing a quiet gasp from you. His free hand rested lightly on your hip, his thumb brushing small circles as he tilted your chin up slightly, his lips brushing against the curve of your throat with a tenderness that made your heart ache.

He didn’t stop there, his mouth continuing its slow descent, pressing soft, deliberate kisses down your collarbone. Each one was filled with a quiet intensity that sent shivers through you. His stubble grazed your skin faintly, a contrast to the warmth of his lips that only heightened the sensation.

“Jensen…”, you whispered, your voice barely audible, your fingers finding their way into his hair as you tried to ground yourself in the moment.

Jensen’s gaze locked onto yours as he paused, his lips brushing just above your collarbone. His green eyes were filled with a quiet intensity, the kind that made your breath hitch and your heart stutter in your chest. His hand on your hip tightened slightly, grounding you, before he dipped his head again, continuing the path he’d started.

His lips moved with a newfound purpose, soft and deliberate as they trailed down to the curve where your shoulder met your neck. He lingered there, his warm breath brushing against your skin before he pressed a series of gentle, lingering kisses that sent a shiver racing down your spine. His free hand slid slowly up your side, resting lightly just beneath your ribs as though he wanted to feel every breath you took.

“You’re perfect”, he murmured against your skin, the words soft but filled with conviction. The gruff timbre of his voice made your heart ache.

Jensen continued his journey, his lips brushing over your collarbone and lower, peppering your skin with kisses that were neither rushed nor hesitant. Each one was deliberate, like he was memorizing every inch of you with his touch. His stubble scraped faintly against your skin, a delicious contrast to the warmth of his lips.

You arched slightly beneath him, your fingers threading into his hair as you tried to pull him closer, to hold onto the intimacy of the moment.

He hesitated, his lips pausing just above your heart as his eyes flicked up to yours. The love and determination you saw in his expression stole the air from your lungs. Slowly, he straightened, his hands moving to frame your face as he leaned in to press his forehead gently against yours.

“I love you”, he whispered, the words soft but unshakable. “No matter what happens. No matter how messy or hard this gets—I love you”.

Your chest tightened as his words wrapped around your heart, and before you could respond, he kissed you again, before he slowly pulled your shirt over your head. You sat up slightly, helping him by raising your arms, your skin already tingling from his touch. He discarded the shirt to the side, his green eyes never leaving you. His hands trailed down, catching the waistband of your sweatpants and panties in one smooth motion, pulling them down as you shifted your hips to let them slide off.

Now, bare in front of him, you felt the air change. His gaze moved over you, but it wasn’t rushed or heated—it was something deeper, something that made your breath hitch. His eyes stopped at your belly, lingering for a moment longer than you expected, and you saw the way he took a sharp breath, his chest rising and falling heavily.

For a moment, Jensen’s expression wavered. His jaw tightened, his hands twitching slightly as though he wasn’t sure what to do next. You could see it—the internal struggle, the way he was trying to reconcile everything he felt. His love for you, the impossible reality of your pregnancy, and the weight of the unknown future.

“Jensen”, you whispered, your voice soft but steady, your hand reaching out to rest lightly on his forearm.

His eyes flicked back up to yours, the vulnerability in them so raw it nearly took your breath away. He swallowed hard, his fingers brushing over your side as he leaned down, pressing a soft kiss just below your navel. His lips lingered there, and you felt the tension in his body as he tried to come to terms with everything this moment represented.

“I’m trying”, he murmured against your skin, his voice low and rough. “I’m trying to wrap my head around this. Around you. Around… everything".

You cupped his face with trembling hands, urging him to look at you. “I know”, you whispered, your voice breaking slightly. “I know, Jensen”.

He stayed there for a moment longer, his forehead resting lightly against your stomach, before pulling back and meeting your gaze. Slowly, he leaned in, his lips brushing yours in a kiss that was soft and searching, filled with the weight of everything he couldn’t yet put into words.

His kisses deepened, his lips moving against yours with a mix of tenderness and quiet urgency. His body shifted above you as he pushed his boxer briefs down just enough to free himself. His hand wrapped around his length, giving himself a few slow pumps to ease the tension coiled tightly in his body. But as his eyes dropped to the space between you, he paused, realizing you weren’t ready for him yet.

He pulled back slightly, just enough to look into your eyes. Leaning forward, he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead before he wetted his fingers on his tongue. Without breaking eye contact, he brought his hand down, his fingers finding your clit with a featherlight touch.

A soft gasp escaped your lips as his fingers began to circle you gently, the warmth and precision of his movements sending sparks through your body. Jensen’s free hand cupped your cheek, grounding you as he continued, his lips brushing against your jawline and neck in a trail of soft, lingering kisses.

“Let me take care of you”, he murmured against your skin, his voice low and soothing.

You nodded, your hands gripping his shoulders as you surrendered to the sensation, your body gradually responding to his touch. His fingers worked with a quiet confidence, never rushing. When he felt you beginning to relax beneath him, your breaths growing heavier, he smiled faintly against your neck, his kisses trailing back to your lips.

“There you go”, he whispered, his tone filled with quiet affection as his fingers dipped lower, testing your readiness. “That’s my girl”.

Jensen took a deep breath, steadying himself as he shifted his hips, bringing his swollen tip to your entrance. His green eyes briefly flickered to yours, filled with something tender and unspoken, before he closed them, leaning his forehead against yours. He pushed in slowly, easing himself into you with deliberate care, letting out a shaky exhale as your warmth surrounded him.

The sensation was overwhelming, a mix of pleasure and emotion that made his jaw tighten. His eyes remained closed, as though shutting out the world would help him focus on the connection between you and push the chaos of his thoughts—your pregnancy, the uncertainty—further to the back of his mind.

You gasped softly at the stretch, your hands sliding up his arms to grip his shoulders as you adjusted to the slow, steady intrusion. Jensen paused, his breathing shallow, giving you time to adjust before pressing in deeper, inch by inch. His fingers tightened against your hips, grounding himself in the moment.

“Fuck…” he murmured, his voice rough and barely audible, his head dipping to press a lingering kiss against your lips. His movements were slow and careful, his body trembling slightly with restraint as he fought the instinct to move faster.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, holding him close as you whispered, “I’m okay, Jensen. I’m okay”.

Your words seemed to steady him, and he began to move, his hips rolling in a slow, unhurried rhythm. Every movement was deliberate, his focus entirely on you, on the connection that had been strained but never broken.

Jensen’s lips found yours again, soft and searching, as though he needed the reassurance of your kiss to keep his emotions in check. “I love you”, he whispered against your lips, his voice breaking slightly as he pressed deeper, his forehead resting against yours.

Your breathing grew heavier, each shallow inhale matching the slow, deliberate rhythm of Jensen’s movements. You couldn’t explain it, couldn’t put into words why this moment felt so intense, so intimate, like it was stripping both of you bare in ways that had nothing to do with your bodies. The warmth of him, the weight of him, the way his green eyes held yours—it all made your chest ache in the most profound way.

“I love you too”, you whispered, your voice trembling but sure. Your arms tightened around his shoulders as you held his gaze, your big, expressive eyes locking onto his. They always had a way of breaking through his walls, of disarming him completely, and right now, they were no different.

Jensen froze for a heartbeat, his breath catching as he looked at you. The emotion in his gaze was overwhelming, a mix of love, relief, and something deeper that he couldn’t quite name. His hand came up to cradle your cheek, his thumb brushing gently against your skin as he whispered, “God, the way you look at me…”.

His words hung in the air, thick with meaning, as he leaned down to capture your lips in a slow, tender kiss. His movements grew more deliberate, each thrust unhurried but filled with intensity, like he was trying to pour everything he felt into every moment, every touch.

You let out a soft moan, your fingers threading through his hair as you held him close, your body moving instinctively in sync with his. “Jensen”, you breathed.

“I’m here”, he murmured, his voice steady even as his breathing hitched. “I’m right here”.

About an hour and a shower later, the two of you found yourselves in the kitchen, the warmth of the morning sun spilling through the windows. Jensen had insisted on making breakfast, a rare event that left you perched on the countertop, your legs swinging lazily as you watched him move around. He was shirtless, his hair still damp as he stood at the stove, flipping bacon and scrambling eggs.

“You know”, you teased, your voice soft but playful, “I could get used to this. You in the kitchen, me supervising”.

Jensen shot you a mock glare over his shoulder, though the corner of his mouth twitched into a smile. “Don’t get any ideas. This is a special occasion”.

“Oh? And what’s the occasion?”, you asked, raising an eyebrow as you sipped your tea. Your stomach seemed to be cooperating so far, and the warmth of the drink was soothing after the whirlwind of emotions from earlier.

Jensen turned back to the stove, flipping the bacon onto a plate with practiced ease. “The occasion”, he said, his tone teasing but his eyes soft as he glanced at you, “is me making sure you’re not surviving off plain rice and water”.

You chuckled, shaking your head as you set the mug down. “Well, I appreciate it”, you said, your gaze lingering on him. Despite everything, there was a comfort in this moment, a sense of normalcy that you hadn’t felt in days.

Jensen brought the plates over to the counter, setting one beside you and leaning against the opposite side, a spatula still in his hand. “You gonna give it a shot?”, he asked, nodding toward the food. “Or are we sticking with tea for now?”.

You looked at the plate, then back at him, your lips curving into a small smile. “I’ll try”, you said softly. “But if I start running for the bathroom, you’re cleaning up”.

Jensen chuckled, setting the spatula down and crossing his arms as he leaned closer. “Deal”, he said, his voice warm. “But I’m betting you’ll keep it down. My cooking is a miracle cure”.

“Is that so?”, you replied, your tone light as you picked up a fork.

Jensen nodded solemnly, his eyes sparkling. “Absolutely. World-renowned bacon and eggs. Fixes everything”.

You rolled your eyes, but your smile lingered as you took a small bite. To your surprise, your stomach didn’t protest, and you let out a relieved sigh. “Okay”, you admitted, “maybe you’re onto something”.

Jensen grinned, reaching out to brush a strand of hair from your face. “Told you”, he said softly, the playfulness fading slightly as his eyes lingered on yours. “We’re gonna figure this out, you know? All of it”.

You nodded, your heart warming at the sincerity in his voice. “I know”, you whispered, your voice barely above a breath. “We will”.

After a while, Jensen still stood across from you, his plate untouched for a long while as he watched you eat. His gaze was soft but heavy, his thoughts clearly somewhere far from the kitchen. When he finally started eating himself, it was in slow, deliberate bites, the quiet between you stretching on.

Eventually, he broke the silence, his voice low and almost hesitant. “You’re gonna have to see a gynecologist while I’m gone”, he said, not quite meeting your eyes as he pushed the eggs around his plate with his fork. “Get everything checked out. Make sure… make sure things are okay”.

You nodded slowly, not wanting to interrupt him. His words hung in the air, and he seemed to brace himself before continuing, his tone more mumbled now. “And you need to eat properly. None of this skipping meals or just throwing up, alright? You’ve got to keep your strength up”.

He paused, his gaze dropping to his plate, and his voice dropped even further. “And no lifting heavy stuff. None of that. I don’t want you hurting yourself”.

His words tumbled out lazily, almost as if he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to say them out loud.

Jensen’s voice grew quieter, almost trailing off as he gestured vaguely toward your belly, still not meeting your eyes. “I know you’re young and all, but you’ve gotta take care of yourself. You know, for… for that”. He cleared his throat awkwardly, his fork dragging lazily across his plate. “Vitamins and all that shit. Just… whatever you need”.

He glanced at you briefly before dropping his gaze again, his fingers tapping against the edge of the countertop. “You can use one of my credit cards. Top drawer on the left in the bedroom”.

You blinked at him, your lips parting in disbelief before a mix of hurt and humor bubbled up in your chest. “Are you planning on not coming back or something?”, you asked, your tone a mix of half-joking and half-wounded. “Because that sure sounds like a goodbye speech, Jensen”.

His head snapped up, his green eyes widening slightly at your words. “What? No”, he said quickly, shaking his head as if the idea itself was absurd. “That’s not… that’s not what I meant”.

“Then what do you mean?”, you pressed, your voice softer now, though the edge of hurt still lingered. “Because it sounds like you’re trying to make sure I can handle everything on my own”.

Jensen let out a heavy sigh, rubbing the back of his neck as his gaze flicked away from yours again. “That’s not it”, he muttered, his voice strained. His shoulders slumping as he pushed his plate aside. His voice dropped even further, almost as if he were talking more to himself than to you. “But you know how often I’m gone”, he muttered, his hand rubbing the back of his neck before sliding over his face. “Back then, Danneel… she had enough help, backup, family around. And you’re… you’re all alone here while I’m gone”.

He paused, his voice thickening with emotion as he ran both hands through his hair. “And god, you’re so young. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you, and now this? We’re so unprepared…”.

His palm covered his eyes, his frustration and fear evident in the way his voice trembled slightly. You watched him for a moment, his words hitting somewhere between concern and condescension, making your chest tighten.

“Jensen”, you said firmly, cutting through his rambling. He froze, his hand dropping just enough for his green eyes to peek through, meeting yours hesitantly. “I’m not fifteen”.

His jaw tightened, and you could see he wanted to argue, but instead, he let out a deep sigh as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I know that”, he said, his voice strained. “I didn’t mean it like that”.

“Then stop talking like I can’t handle myself”, you replied, your tone softer now but still firm. “I’m scared too, okay? But I’m not a kid, and I’m not alone in this. You’re here, even if you’re gone sometimes. We’re doing this together, remember?”.

Jensen sighed heavily again, leaning forward.

“Kids just…”, he started, his voice hesitant, as though saying the words might make them more real. He let out another sigh, shaking his head. “They can ruin every little quiet moment, you know? And we already don’t have much of those. Just thinking about coming home after weeks of filming and then…”. He hesitated, his green eyes flickering to yours, filled with vulnerability. “Having to share you with a screaming baby, not sleeping more than five minutes at night, you not being able to come with me to conventions or stuff anymore. I—”. His voice broke slightly, and he looked away, his jaw tightening. “God, baby, I don’t want that for us”.

His words hung in the air, raw and unfiltered, as you watched him struggle to put his feelings into words. His shoulders were tense, his expression pained as though admitting this was harder than anything he’d done before.

“It’s not that I don’t love you”, he said finally, his voice softer now, almost pleading. “I do. So damn much. But I’ve been here before. I’ve done the sleepless nights, the crying, the chaos. And with us—what we have now—it’s different. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose you”.

You swallowed hard, his words hitting you with a bittersweet ache. You could feel his fear, his desperation to hold onto the life you’d built together, even as the reality of the situation pulled you both in a direction you hadn’t planned for.

“Jensen”, you said gently. “I hear you. I really do. And I don’t want to lose what we have either. But this… this isn’t something we can wish away”.

His eyes met yours again, a flicker of guilt crossing his face. “I know”, he admitted quietly. “I know it’s not. I just—”. He paused, his lips pressing into a tight line as he struggled to find the right words. “I just don’t know how to do this again without it breaking us”.

Jensen hesitated, his fingers tensing as he dropped his gaze. His voice, when he finally spoke, was barely above a whisper, almost as though he didn’t want to hear the words himself.

“Would you just… think about your options?”, he asked, his green eyes flickering up to meet yours briefly before darting away again. The tension in his shoulders was palpable, his entire body braced for your reaction. It was clear what he meant—clearer than you wanted it to be. He was asking you to consider something you’d already told him you couldn’t do.

Your chest tightened, your breath catching as the weight of his words settled over you. You knew this was coming, had seen it in his reluctance, his fear, his avoidance. But hearing him say it still hit like a punch to the gut.

“Jensen”, you said softly, your voice trembling. “I told you. I can’t… I can’t do that. It’s not something I could ever live with”.

He nodded slowly, exhaling sharply as he ran a hand through his hair. “I know”, he said, his voice rough. “I know you said that, but—”. He stopped, his hand clenching into a fist as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. “I just… I need you to really think about it. For us. For everything we’ve built. This changes everything, (Y/N)”.

His words cut deeply, and you felt the tears welling in your eyes again. “You think I don’t know that?”, you asked, your voice breaking. “You think I haven’t been thinking about what this means, for me, for us, for everything? I’ve been carrying that weight since the second I saw those two lines”.

“I’m not saying you haven’t”, he said quickly, his tone desperate. “I’m just saying… maybe it’s not too late to—”.

“To what?”, you interrupted, your voice rising slightly. “Make it go away? Pretend it never happened? Jensen, I can’t do that. I can’t. And the fact that you keep asking me to…”. You trailed off, shaking your head as the tears slipped down your cheeks.

"Forget it”, Jensen mumbled, his voice tight as he grabbed his plate and carrying it to the dishwasher with a clatter. He was avoiding your gaze, but his movements betrayed his frustration—sharp, almost mechanical.

You swallowed hard, your emotions swirling between sadness and anger. “No, Jensen”, you said frimly, though your voice remained quieter. “You don’t just get to drop that on me and then say, ‘forget it’”.

“I said forget it”, he snapped, his hands gripping the counter so tightly his knuckles whitened. His shoulders hunched, his head bowed. For all his anger, he looked more defeated than anything else.

You took a shaky breath, trying to calm the tremor in your voice. “You don’t understand what you’re asking of me. It’s not just a choice—it’s… it’s a part of me now. I can’t turn that off, Jensen”.

He turned to face you, his expression a mix of anguish and frustration. “And you don’t understand what it’s doing to me—to us. This wasn’t part of the plan, (Y/N). We had a plan. A life we were building”.

“Life doesn’t follow plans", you said softly. “I know this isn’t what either of us expected, but that doesn’t mean we just give up because it’s hard”.

His jaw tightened, and for a moment, it looked like he might argue.

You slipped off the counter, ready to keep talking, to keep trying, but Jensen’s back was already to you. He walked away, his steps heavy, as though each one carried the weight of his thoughts. He didn’t glance back as he headed upstairs, and the sound of his footsteps on the stairs echoed like a hammer to your chest.

This morning, everything had felt… better. Maybe not perfect, but it had been enough to give you hope. For a moment, you’d thought the cracks between you were starting to heal. Now, though, that hope felt like it had shattered, scattered across the kitchen floor with no way to pick up the pieces.

You stood there, the silence pressing in around you, your breath uneven. The idea that he was packing, getting ready to head back to LA, made your stomach twist. It felt like running—like he was retreating to somewhere safer, somewhere away from you. From this. And that hurt more than anything he’d said.

But part of you understood, even if you hated it. Jensen had always been someone who needed control, who thrived on plans and stability. And this—this wasn’t just a curveball. It was a whole new game.

Still, understanding didn’t make it any easier.

You ran a hand through your hair, willing yourself not to cry again. You couldn’t fall apart, not now. Not when everything felt like it was already teetering on the edge. Instead, you forced yourself to move, starting to clean the Kitchen. It gave you something to focus on, even if it felt hollow.

As the minutes ticked by, you listened for the sounds of him upstairs. Drawers opening, the faint zip of a suitcase. Each noise was a reminder of how temporary this moment was—how close you were to losing him. Or maybe how close he was to choosing to walk away.

You wanted to go up there, to say something, anything, that might change his mind. But what could you say that you hadn’t already? What could you say that wouldn’t feel like begging?

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰

Part 40

Taglist: @cheynovak @chriszgirl92 @jenniferr0323 @angelbabyyy99 @cevansbaby-dove @muhahaha303 @jackles010378 @suckitands33 @n-o-p-e-never @mayafatimakhan @ladysparkles78 @viviandarkbloom06 @jassackles @evasmlp @acklesaddict67 @mostlymarvelgirl @emma1998sblog @mishaesque @headinthemoon87 @hobby27 @winchesterwild78 @impala67rollingthroughtown @manicjk @kr804573 @zaratahir @djs8891 @winchesterwild78 @jamerlynn @whimsyfinny @libby99hb @deansimpalababy @deans-queen @kawaii-arfid-memes @faephoria @stoneyggirl2 @fitxgrld @luvr4miya @yikeschoices @lyssalvus @soab1967 @luvr4miya @didi0666 @impala67rollingthroughtown @cheekygirl2309 @kamisobsessed @deansimpalababy @magnificientgirl @ @dulcescorderitas @mandee7

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles x reader #jensen x reader #jensen x y/n #jensen x you #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen ackles the boys #jensen ackles x y/n #spn cast

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gorbo-longstocking · 2 months ago

Text

Do Not Blame the Sea | Chapter 6

Pairing: Emperor Geta/Reader, Emperor Caracalla/Reader

Summary: You are not yourself. How can you be after the realization that this is your life now? What you thought was a long, neverending dream is actually reality. At this realization, you find the world and your sense of self begin to slip away between your fingers. The emperors notice, and Caracalla attempts to help you. Poorly.

Tags: Very severe dissociation from a POV character including both derealization and depersonalization, major emotional breakdown, implications of period-typical slavery, self-harm via negligence, injuries, homesickness, Caracalla is bad at comforting, low self-worth from reader, and implications of reader’s toxic relationship with their parents. I think that’s everything.

Word Count: 6.5k Words

Read on AO3

Masterlist.

The days blurred together into nothing more than a foggy haze. Your head hurt. It hurt and that terrified you. There was only one reason why you could feel pain, and you struggled to keep it caged in the back of your mind where it shrieked and writhed as if it had a will of its own. Think, remember, realize, it screamed. You had to cover your ears to drown it out. Unbelievably scared and absolutely sick with terror, your stomach would lurch every time those realizations returned. It was only locked away in the safety of your clinic, the praetorian in the adjacent room, and away from prying eyes, did you allow yourself to curl in on yourself. To feel this horror, if only for a second. A single, relieving, aching moment in time before you locked it back away, deep inside your chest where it belonged. Where it clawed at your ribcage and tore at your lungs.

This was something you couldn’t think about, wouldn’t dare to ponder, and yet…

And yet—

Your hands trembled as you reorganized your surgical instruments. Again and again, for two days, you would complete your duties in a mindless haze, then return to your clinic to stare at your tools. They were deceptively sharp. Your hands were covered in little cuts, bandaged haphazardly. Carelessness got you hurt, and you tried not to think about how your hands stung with every movement. The room felt fake, it was proof that you were right all along. Your body didn’t feel like it was your own. When you stared down at yourself, the way it moved, seemingly stuttering behind your actual instructions in a way that made you feel you were in a bad video game. You knew the truth.

It was more proof that this wasn’t real. A figment of your stress-addled mind, that was all this was. You hadn’t defied all logic, all science, and time-traveled back to Ancient Rome, because that was impossible. One day, you would wake up in your bed and this nightmare would be over.

You looked down at your injured fingers, blood blooming across the bandages. Then why did it hurt? Why could you feel pain? It wasn’t until you felt an ache radiate down your spine did you realize you were picking at one of the welts Caracalla left behind. There was a scab over it, the cost of all of your inspections.

You looked at the scalpel, glinting sharp in the torchlight. It was time to count that one too.

The events of the past two days were strange. While you could remember what happened, it felt far away, as if it had happened to someone who wasn’t you. A person wearing your skin, speaking with your voice, but, in the end, was separate from who you were. A clone, or a puppet, dancing on strings that belonged to no one.

That was who you were: no one.

It was hard to be ‘someone,’ and it wasn’t until you became empty did you realize the complexities of being. The choices that came with every day, gone, the simplicity of wading through it all on autopilot as the world writhed and shifted around you, just as empty as yourself. It was intoxicating. Why would you ever go back to how it was before? For once, living was easy, you would be a fool to give that up. Deep down, you knew it was wrong. That you should be fighting to stay present rather than sink away into the swamp inside your head.

Right now, being a person came with consequences, ones you didn’t have the faculties to fight through. Not right now, maybe not ever. One day, you would wake up in modernity, and all of this nonsense would fade away like every other dream you had. You had to cling to that.

“My friend,” Aelius began, his tone soft. It wasn’t until he spoke did you realize his hand was on your shoulder. His skin was darker than the hair on his arms that if it wasn’t so prominent that it would be hard to see. Your gaze flickered from Marianus to stare at him. He looked worried. “Are you feeling alright?”

“Yes.” Your voice didn’t sound like your own. There was an emptiness to it that echoed in the open air. The first time you had patched Marianus’ wounds, Aelius was asleep. It made the situation easier to deal with. If you looked closely, you could see the concern swimming in Marianus’ dark eyes, though he didn’t voice it.

Aelius had no such reservations. If you didn’t feel so strange, maybe it would have made you angry. You didn’t know. There was a bite in your gut. “Marianus mentioned you were acting strange the previous day, and I see why now. I think you should rest, medicus.”

“I’m not done,” Came your reply. Your fingers twitched against Marianus’ chest. There was a hand wrapped around your wrist and you stared at it before following it to where it attached to the glenohumeral joint.

It belonged to Marianus. He was frowning, and you wanted to feel ashamed. “Medicus, you are no use to anyone like this.”

He was right. Distantly, you recognized how badly you were dissociating. This is worse than it had ever been, and truthfully, treating Marianus right now, you would be more of a hindrance than a help. Your pupils flickered when you felt a wave of shame wash over you before it was gone, replaced once more with a buzzing numbness.

“What’s wrong,” Aelius tried, his thumb attempting to soothe you by rubbing against your upper arm. “Perhaps we can help.”

“I am as I need to be,” You muttered. Gently, you ducked under Aelius’ arm and stood. The exit to the barracks looked distant, and each step you took, it seemed to get farther away. Behind you, Aelius and Marianus were speaking, but you couldn’t hear what they said. Maybe it was Marianus who shouted, or maybe it was Aelius. Like all things these days, they faded away into the background, simply more noise for you to drown out.

Static faded away into silence. Blessed, blissful silence as you walked down the palace halls, your unblinking gaze fixated in the distance. You were nothing again. For some reason, you felt embarrassed, but you couldn’t remember why. It was probably not very important.

The first night that you made Caracalla his chamomile tea, he wasn’t put off by your inability to speak. He was far too preoccupied by playing with your fingers, his own tangling with yours before he pulled away, again and again. You focused on the repetition. It was comforting. His soft skin against your own, damp with sweat, only to pull away. He would clench his fingers around yours, forcing a little resistance in the motion, almost as if you didn’t want him to let go.

He did this until he fell asleep. It was his snoring that jostled you. Caracalla’s mouth was open, drool seeping from between his lips onto his pillow. When you blinked, you were using the hem of your tunic to wipe his face dry. It was an effort in futility, you knew that much. He would only drool more when you left. Still, it felt like something you needed to do.

You didn’t know when you returned to your clinic.

The sun rose as blood from your fingers dribbled onto the floor. You had spent the entire night lining up your supplies, and your absent state left you more reckless than usual. Instead of patching yourself up, you watched the red liquid drip from the tips of your fingers and onto the floor. There was an audible, rhythmic plop. It reminded you of a clock ticking.

Plop, plop, plop.

When you looked down again, there were bandages where the cuts had been. You didn’t remember doing it, but it must have been you considering you were alone. You flexed your hands, and a whisper of pain sliced through your nerves. That awful realization howled in your chest as the world felt more blurry than before.

It was morning, you had to check on Marianus.

You were back in your clinic and the bleeding had stopped. Unfortunately, the blood you had forgotten to clean up before you left had dried to the floor. It would take a rag and some elbow grease to get up. There was a nagging sensation in the back of your skull that told you to clean up before the wrong person saw. Who was the wrong person? You didn’t know, you didn’t care.

Your arm ached from scrubbing.

The floor glistened in the sunlight by the time you were done. Sweat dripped from your face — or were those tears? — moistening the marble further. You felt yourself frown as you wiped it away. There, now there was no evidence that you had injured yourself. It wasn’t until you saw the bloody bandages draped around your fingers did you realize how stupid you were being.

“Alga!” The snap of your nickname startled you enough to wince. Pulling yourself so that you were kneeling, you stared up at Caracalla. He was frowning, his arms crossed. “Why are you scrubbing the floors? We have slaves for that. This is not work for a medicus of your caliber.”

Caracalla was angry with you. There was a strange squirming under your skin and your head throbbed, almost reminiscent of how he had beaten on it. Your lips parted and you blinked at him. His eyes darted to your mouth before his pupils dilated, taking in your position with a hunger that wasn’t there before.

“Huh?” You uttered.

That seemed to snap him out of his thoughts. Caracalla’s eyebrows furrowed and he reached down to brush his thumb over the welt on your forehead. A bit of anxiety sparked in his blue eyes, only to be drowned away by frustration. “Did I knock you stupid? I don’t remember it, but Geta tells me I threw a cup at you.”

“Oh. Yes, you did.” Now you were standing. Caracalla was a short man, and you didn’t know who was taller between you or him. Either way, you were eye level with him now. “You hit me, too. It h—” You cut yourself off with a choked noise. A split second of horror buzzed under your skin before it was gone, leaving you numb once more. “I’m fine, now. I think.”

“You think?” Caracalla repeated. He was scowling now. “Either you are, or you aren’t.”

“I don’t know,” You mumbled.

With an exasperated noise, Caracalla grabbed you by your upper arm and steered you toward your chair. There was no gentleness in the way he pushed you to sit. His eyebrows were knit as he glowered at you. Underneath it all, however, was an undercurrent of concern that he didn’t seem to know what to do with.

“Look around the room and tell me what you see!” He snapped and clapped his hands twice to signal it was your turn.

All you managed was to utter another ungraceful, “Huh?”

Caracalla huffed and clenched his fists at his sides. “You’re impossible! How did you do this? Smell me, medicus!”

You didn’t have time to lean back before he was in your space. With one hand, he tugged down the collar of his tunic to display his collarbone, and with the other, he yanked you forward by your hair. Practically limp in his grasp, you allowed him to drag your nose against your skin.

“Alga, tell me what I smell like!” He ordered, his grip tightening.

“Lavender. You always smell like lavender.”

Pleased, Caracalla let you go. He seemed proud of himself, almost glowing under the force of it. “There! You must feel better now, Alga.” When you didn’t look at him, your gaze fixated on the floor, his face split into frustration again. “This is ridiculous.” He shoved an accusing finger in your direction. “You’re being ridiculous!”

Again, you didn’t respond, though you did lift your gaze to stare at the digit invading your space.

“Say something to me,” He demanded.

“I apologize.”

That must not have been the response that Caracalla wanted because he drew back, puffed up like a furious cat. His fingers gripped your shoulders as he shook you with each word. “I do not want an apology, I want my medicus back!” A bit more desperate, he added, his eyes closed tightly. “Fix! Undo! Return to how you once were! If you are like this forever, I will never forgive you!”

Even after releasing you, he was breathing heavily. Nostrils flaring, he gave you a firm pat on the cheek in an effort to snap you out of your episode. Followed by another, harder this time. It did little to break the fog you found yourself in. Caracalla looked furious, his jaw set and his other hand balled tight at his side. In the end, however, underneath all of his fury, there was regret. He reached forward, gentle now, to run his hands over the knots he left on your head.

“Geta will know,” He mumbled to himself as he ran his nails over your scalp. You didn’t realize you were leaning into his touch until a cackle escaped Caracalla’s throat. “Yes, yes, you agree, don’t you? My brother will know how to make you better. Stay here, Alga, I won’t be long.”

When you looked up, Caracalla was gone. You were alone in your clinic again. Sitting in your chair, you began to unwrap the linen bandages that covered your hand to examine your cuts. Instead of with a scholarly mind, you were bleary, poking at the scabs with an experimental finger. If you pressed too hard on one, it would hurt, and your surroundings would tunnel even further. You didn’t remember why pain was such a bad thing, all you knew was that you didn’t want to think about it.

There was so much that you didn’t want to think about. It was all there, bubbling under the surface of your marrow, though you refused to let it run over. You couldn’t lose control like that, your parents would be furious with you. They’d find you even more pathetic than they already did. Geta and Caracalla would likely agree. Your parents were the smarter, better versions of yourself, you were simply a cheap knock-off. The thought of earning the emperors’ disdain even more than you already have made your heart squeeze tight in your chest.

Someone was snapping. Your eyes darted from your lap to see a hand directly in front of you. Caracalla was back, like he promised, with Geta bent at the waist, his brown eyes examining yours.

Satisfied, he straightened and allowed his arm to fall to his side. “He responds to noise. That’s a good sign.”

“Is it, brother? You are no physician,” Caracalla argued. His jaw was set in a hard line as he gestured to you. “Look at him! He’s in a state of— of—” He cut himself off with a frustrated noise.

“If you are going to be difficult, why fetch me? You wanted my help, so now you get it. Be happy with it,” Geta responded. While he was clearly displeased with his brother, his focus was entirely on you. “Medicus, are you in there? Your emperor demands a response.”

You parted your lips to reply, but you couldn’t bring your jaw to open. Ever so slightly, you felt your eyebrows twitch together. Geta let out a long suffering sigh.

“Alga, you…” He turned to Caracalla, lips pursed into a thin line. “What was his name again?”

“I don’t remember! It was some ridiculous, foreign noise, how am I supposed to remember that?” Caracalla was shouting now, his hands on his hips. His body shook ever so slightly as his gaze shifted from his brother back to you. With a vacant stare, you watched his expression morph from frustration to something imploring and sweet.

“Algacula,” He cooed. “Tell me and my brother what has happened with you, and we will give you a very generous treat.”

“There is nothing wrong with me,” You replied on instinct.

Both emperors drew back. Caracalla brought his fists to his face to let out a scream between clenched teeth, while Geta let out a disbelieving scoff.

“You are not yourself, medicus, anyone can see that. Now snap out of it, you are upsetting my brother.” You were back to being quiet. It made Geta’s eye twitch, and you noted that he had kohl smeared on the outside of his eyelid. It made him look more intimidating than usual. Without taking his gaze off you, he nudged Caracalla to the door. “Have a slave fetch your pet ape.”

A smile made Caracalla’s eyes light up with relief. “Yes, yes, Dondas. That is a good idea, brother, she always helps.”

Geta waited for Caracalla to be out of earshot before he gestured to your hands with a subtle sweep of his finger. “How did that happen, medicus? It looks like you have barely taken care of your own wounds. What use are you as a physician if you can’t even do that?”

“Huh?” You looked from Geta to your hands and softly closed your hands. A few scabs pulled taut, but none split open. All you could recognize was that it hurt. “I was not careful. It was an accident.”

Geta closed his eyes and released a breath. “Accidental, yes.”

Caracalla’s giggle, followed by an animalistic squeak drew your attention. Sitting on his shoulder in her own tunic, one that matched Caracalla’s in color, and a golden leash attached to the collar on her neck, was a little monkey. She was small enough to be cute rather than terrifying, you had heard enough horror stories about chimp attacks to ever want to be near one. Still, though, there was a Roman emperor standing before you with a monkey on his shoulder. You felt your brain throb as a stab of sheer disbelief cut through the haze, causing your nose to wrinkle and your eyes to widen.

“Is that a fucking monkey?” You asked in English.

Caracalla’s expression mirrored you as he ran his fingers through the monkey’s fur. “Brother, he is speaking nonsense.”

“That he is. You made it worse, Caracalla. Remove the ape.”

His hands tighten around the monkey’s golden leash. “You liar! Dondas was your idea!”

“It doesn’t matter whose idea it was, look at him, it’s obviously making whatever is wrong with him worse!” Geta threw his arm out at you, his patience fraying at the edges.

Caracalla looked at you, then back at the monkey, his disappointment coming off of him in waves. Carefully, he allowed her to run off his arm into the waiting hands of a young man, who graciously took her leash without a word.

It was silent for a moment, only to be broken by Caracalla. His voice was soft, barely a whisper. “Brother, you don’t think I caused this…”

“No, I recognize this,” Geta said, softer than you ever heard him. He placed a comforting hand on his brother’s shoulder. “This is what you are like after one of your outbursts, quiet and distant. I think what our medicus needs is time. He will come back, just as you always do.”

“He has been like this for over a day,” Caracalla hissed. “The praetorian I assigned to him told me.”

“We will assign guards to watch him at all times. Once he comes back, we will know immediately.” With a harsh sigh, Geta pinched the bridge of his nose. “Caracalla, we have duties to attend to today. Both of us. I don’t need you pining after an unresponsive physician while I juggle senators asking after you.”

Caracalla was ready to argue, glancing at you over his shoulder. “The senators are unimportant! We are the emperors, we should be able to do as we please. This is what pleases me.”

“Do not fight me on this, not now. Alga will be here when we are done, I’m certain of it. If they are not, the praetorian will fetch you.”

With narrowed eyes, Caracalla countered, “And you will allow me to leave?”

“Yes, brother, if that will get you to join me. Now, come.” Geta pressed his palm between his brother’s shoulder blades and began to force him out of your clinic.

Even as far away as you felt, you were able to recognize it wasn’t only Caracalla who gave you a final glance before the door shut.

It was dark now. Your reflection shone in the scalpel’s sharp metal as you held it up to the torchlight. The sight of yourself made your head spin. That wasn’t who you were, it couldn’t be. Dark circles lined your eyes and your hair hung in limp curtains around your face. If you looked closely, your roots were beginning to show. Once you woke up, you could dye it back to the green you liked so much.

“Wake up…” You murmured into the empty room. The sound of your voice almost startled you, it had been hours since there was another person in your clinic aside from yourself. Maybe days, maybe weeks, maybe months, maybe years.

There was a long cut on your palm. Blood bubbled from it as your scalpel clattered to the floor. Your hands were no longer bandaged, you didn’t remember when you removed them, nor why you didn’t bandage them once more. Staring down at the cut, you could only think one thing as it oozed red:

It hurt.

Inside your chest, your heart began to pound. It squeezed and thudded, filling your veins with adrenaline. It felt as though ants were marching under your skin, their little legs prickling along the folds of your muscles.

It hurt.

Tears began to flow down your cheeks, scorching and silent. Your lips trembled as your breath hitched and snot bubbled from your nostrils.

It hurt.

You couldn’t breathe. Weeping, heart thundering, you couldn’t breathe, no matter how hard you tried. Desperately, you clawed at your chest, an attempt to rip yourself open before everything you had been avoiding spilled from you in a white-hot frenzy. All you managed to do was smear blood in your tunic, settled next to the dried drool from Caracalla’s slumber.

You could never go home and it hurt.

“Oh, god!” You gasped. The speed at which you stood sent your chair clattering behind you. Your hands ached as you clutched at yourself, at your head, at your chest, at your leaking eyes. All you could hear was your own ragged breathing. “Oh, god! Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

This was no dream, you knew that now. There was no hiding from it anymore. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t fill your lungs with air. You weren’t dreaming, this was real. Rome was real, the emperors were real, Aelius and Marianus were real, every person who called this palace home was real. It was all disgustingly real.

You were running now. Out of the clinic and down the halls, you were sprinting like a mad man. Upon turning a corner, your body slammed into the wall and a sob ripped from your throat with a ball of saliva. It dripped down your chin, and you pushed yourself onward on shaking legs. You needed to see, to prove to yourself that you hadn’t lost your mind, and there was only one sight that you could think of that would prove that to you.

The one place you had avoided looking since you arrived.

Grass stained your tunic. You had tripped on the small step leading to the imperial gardens, causing you to skid through the foliage. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t force yourself to stand. Each time you managed, your knees gave out on you, sending you back to the ground.

In the end, it didn’t matter. You didn’t have to be on your feet to look up.

To see the stars in all their glory.

Above your head was a tapestry of glittering silver, more beautiful than you had ever seen it. The sky was a beautiful mix of purple and blue, the moon nestled in its edges, full and bright enough to cast a milky glow on the gardens. There were constellations you didn’t recognize, but so many that you knew the name for. Ursa major, Orion’s belt, Cassiopeia, Perseus, you listed as you felt a scream begin to form in your chest. It was a strange mix of uncanny and familiar that only served to make your tear ducts leak all the more. You squeezed your eyes shut before you opened them again to see nothing had changed. The stars, ever present, even when the modern city lights emptied the sky of their shine, laughed down at you.

You could never imagine a sight such as this. No part of your brain could ever conjure this night sky, not in a million years. This splendor, the pain that flowered from your palms, none of this could ever have come from you on your own. Pathetic, worthless you, so far from everything you knew, with no hope of return.

You would never get drinks with your coworkers after a long shift again. You would never see the rare bits of your mother’s approval, or your father’s awkward hugs. You would never have chocolate, or have coffee, or eat a burger again. You would never enter the hospital where you worked.

Everything you were, everything you had, you watched it fade away under the everpresent stars.

A sob so strong it was almost a gag caused you to double over. Snot and saliva mingled with the salty taste of your tears. Your hands clawed at your neck under the weight of the keening wails you couldn’t hear, but you knew you were making. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t turn it off this time. Weeks of repression had come back to bite you in the ass as a catastrophic breakdown. It wasn’t new, you had always been like this. Pushing onward, wading through the muck until you couldn’t take it anymore.

“I— I can’t— Breathe. I can’t— Help me— I can’t…” The words fell from your lips in sporadic English, followed with a bubble of snot when you tried to exhale through your nose.

So caught up in your own panic, you didn’t realize you weren’t alone anymore.

Not until a sharp bark echoed behind you, sounding both furious and scandalized, “Who made you cry?”

Now, more than ever, you wished this was a dream. You recognized that voice, it had become such a familiar one since you fucking time-traveled that you could never hope to forget it. Caracalla was here to see you break apart at the seams. Another gasp left you, and in a desperate attempt to hide, you curled your knees to your chest and covered your face with your hands.

“Alga! Who made you cry?” Caracalla was closer now. When he reached down to shake you by the shoulder, you realized he was next to you. His grip was harsh, just as Caracalla always was. Rough and unyielding. “Tell me now! Tell me who made my medicus cry!”

For some reason, his insistence irritated you. Ripping your hands from your face, you could taste your own blood on your lips. You must have smeared it across your face. “Me! I did! This is my fault, and now I— and now I cannot stop!”

Caracalla frowned. If he was taken aback by you shouting at him, he didn’t show it. He merely looked annoyed. “Yes, you can. Tell yourself to stop crying and you will.”

“Is that— Is that how it works for you, Caesar?” You sneered. It was cruel of you to throw his own issues back at him, but all you could think about was breathing again. Caracalla narrowed his eyes at you, though he said nothing. Talking irritated your throat, and you coughed a few times to soothe the ache. All it did was make it hurt more.

Everything hurt.

Your face crumpled again, and you must have looked pathetic because Caracalla’s scowl softened. Not enough to be kind, only enough to go from furious to frustrated. He crouched down and pawed at your face, attempting to wipe it dry. Each time he managed, more tears escaped from the corners of your eyes. It ruined his progress. Caracalla got rougher the more your body defied him.

“What is wrong with you, medicus? One moment, you will barely respond, the next, you are more hysterical than a woman in childbirth.” He was kneeling now, working tirelessly to clean your filthy face. Desperate for comfort, you grabbed his wrists and leaned into his palms.

By now, your crying had become miserable sniffles as fat tears rolled off your chin. “I can— I can never go home, Caesar.”

“Yes, I am aware.” He looked perplexed as the heel of his palm pressed into your nose. It wasn’t gentle, and it made you move to pull away. Caracalla didn’t let you, his fingers tightening against the flesh of your cheek. “It is as you told me and my brother when we hired you. Your strange little country will never let you pass through its borders again. Why is this a problem now, medicus? Or have you been lying to me?”

“I thought— I thought I could go back, I thought they’d let me in,” You choked out. It was hard to both speak Latin and weave lies into truth in the state you were in now. “I thought this was not—- not r- real and— How can this be real?”

Rather than use his own tunic, Caracalla lifted the hem of yours to wipe away snot from your upper lip. He was frowning again, eyebrows knit. “Of course this is real. I can barely make sense of what you are saying, Alga. You sound more ridiculous than usual.”

“I miss my mom, and my dad—” You were blubbering now, your fingers tangling with Caracalla’s. “— And my coworkers, and my superiors! I will never see them again!” There was an intake of air, signaling he was about to respond, only for you to bulldoze over him. “I will never be able to have chocolate, or coffee, or any other foods from home again.”

Caracalla placed his hand over your mouth and forced your lips shut. “I will have the kitchens make you whatever your heart desires if you will stop this crying! Who cares about your mater, or your pater, or anyone else. They are gone and I am here. That is better than what they have to offer. I can give you more than they could ever hope to, and here you are crying over them instead of being grateful for me.”

When you spoke again, it was muffled by his hand. Caracalla seemed to debate with himself, looking away for a moment, before he removed his palm from your lips.

“I have lost everything,” You whispered, glassy eyes staring up at him.

He huffed, and if you had to guess, he was frustrated his words didn’t sink in.

“Yes, you have!” He agreed bluntly. “Think of what you have gained, Alga. The favor of an emperor, a palace to lay your head to rest, skills that surpass every medicus in Rome! You are hopeless if you cannot see that you have gained more than you have lost.”

You wanted to keep crying. It couldn’t be that simple to soothe you, but his words, though harsh, were logical. Back home, back in the future, you weren’t happy. You had everything, yet, at the end of the day, you were miserable. Maybe that was how it would be in Rome, too. It was possible you were simply broken so completely that there was no hope of joy in your future.

It was also possible that your happiness laid in this miraculous event that defied every inch of your world view. That made sense, in a disturbing way. Everything Caracalla said made sense, even if you didn’t want it to.

“My parents didn’t even like me,” Your voice was thick as you spoke. At least the tears stopped.

Caracalla smiled, a sense of triumph in his eyes. “It is as I say, Alga. You are wanted in Rome, where in your country, even your parents didn’t want you. See how much you have gained? You should be rejoicing.”

“I am scared, Caesar.” You shook your head, far more calm than you were before. “Everything is so different in Rome. I fear that I will ruin everything by being here.”

“Then you will bring ruin.” Caracalla shrugged, his grin growing with each second that you weren’t crying. “Let it break, let it shatter in your grasp. Your Caesar will have it cleaned and you can return to his side, fat and happy.”

The assurance shouldn’t have steadied you as much as it did. Caracalla was unpredictable. While he may be attached to you now, how long would that last? You looked at his face, earnest and open in a way that betrayed his immaturity, his eyes gleaming as his thumbs traced the outlines of your face, careful to collect any wetness that remained. If there was one thing that you knew, now more than ever, it was that Emperor Caracalla was no liar. Even if the truth of his words changed in the future, for now, at least, he meant every word.

Hopefully, that would give you enough time to work out a backup plan. For once, you felt calm.

“Thank you, Caesar.” Against all odds, a tired smile made your lips twitch upwards. “I look forward to being your physician until you grow tired of me.”

Caracalla’s expression turned mischievous now that he was certain your outburst was over. Crawling closer to you, he pressed his hands against your thighs to uncurl your knees from your chest. With an ungraceful flop, he laid his head in your lap to stare up at you. “Good, good. I believe that I deserve a reward for suffering through your hysteria.”

“Would you like to watch the stars with me, Caesar?” Despite feeling better, you still sounded watery.

Impatient and uncaring now that you were no longer weeping, Caracalla grabbed your wrist to bring it to his hair. For a moment, he stared at the cut on your palm, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. His eyes flickered to your splotchy, still damp face. You startled when he tangled your fingers in his hair. “What is so special about the stars? They are the same as they are every night.”

“They don’t look so beautiful in my country.” It was grounding to play with Caracalla’s hair. His soft curls tickled the cuts on your fingers and his eyes fluttered shut with a soft hum once you began your ministrations.

“How can the stars look different in your country? Is it truly so far away?”

“Further than you could ever imagine, Caesar. In the cities, the streets are lined with torches that glow brighter than any you have ever seen. For the entire night, they are on, protecting travelers and showing off merchant’s wares. The city is so big and so bright, it drowns out the stars, making the sky empty, save for the moon.”

“Sounds like an awful place, melimelum.” Caracalla opened his eyes to search your face, testing you. “You are better off in my Empire. Here, you can see the stars in all their glory.”

“Yes.” Craning your neck, you took in the velvet sky one last time. “More beautiful than I’ve ever seen.” You took a deep breath, finally filling your lungs to the brink, then exhaled. “I apologize for my outburst.”

“You should,” Caracalla said, leaning into your touch. “I will not be so gentle next time. A good slap would have knocked sense into you faster.”

“Caesar, that would have made me cry more,” You weren’t able to swallow the incredulous laugh that bubbled in your throat.

Caracalla’s shoulders jumped in a lazy shrug. There was a hint of smug pride in his smile. “I would calm you, then. I have once already, how much harder could a second be?”

“I will be there to calm you as well,” You said, tugging at his bangs.

Before Caracalla could respond, the sound of footsteps on the walkway behind you drew your attention. When you turned, there was Geta, late to the party once more. He took in your red rimmed eyes and tear stained face with an air of urgency. It wasn’t until you gave him a small smile and a wave did his posture slump.

“Medicus, what are you doing in the gardens so late at night?”

Caracalla sat up to glare at Geta over his shoulder, your fingers still tangled in his hair. Your own expression was a juxtaposition to his, tired amusement etched into your features. “I needed to see the stars. They are beautiful tonight.”

“The stars? So, you can respond again,” Geta said, exasperated. “And somehow, my brother has found his way into your embrace for another night.”

“I calmed him down, brother.” Caracalla sat up, his breath was hot against the shell of your ear, making your face burn. It sounded almost like he was rubbing it in Geta’s face.

Geta glanced at you, his eyebrows raised. “Did he now?”

“Your brother has a way with words.” More so than you expected. Caracalla’s grin grew even more, showing off his teeth.

Rolling his eyes, Geta let out a scoff. “You are the first person to say that about Caracalla, and now he is certain to be insufferable because of it.”

“I have a way with words, brother. Perhaps I should be the one to speak to the senate tomorrow.” With his arms draped over each side of your collarbone, Caracalla rested his chin on your shoulder. You didn’t know if he was serious or not. Judging by Geta’s grimace, he was.

Now that Caracalla’s attention was on his brother, you mouthed a silent apology to Geta. He responded by pursing his lips at you, clearly displeased. With a flick of his wrist, he gestured to Caracalla. “Come, brother, off to bed. If you are to speak with the senate tomorrow, you must do so with a clear mind.”

“Come with me?” Came his whisper, lips brushing against your ear. The scent of lavender was stronger now. It made your head spin, not unlike earlier, but far more pleasant.

Gently, you pushed him away as you pried his arms from around your neck. “Tonight, someone else will make your medicine, Caesar. I must take care of my wounds.”

Disappointment and confusion made his face scrunch, though he stood with little effort on your part. “Tomorrow night, then.”

“Of course, Caesar.”

Caracalla stared down at you, his gaze heavy, before he let out a huff and trudged to Geta’s side. You offered both emperors a farewell. The relief on Geta’s features was too slight for you to notice in your exhausted state. Without waiting for either’s footsteps to fade, you laid down on your back to face the sky.

The stars were smiling now.

Only in the past could they do something so quaint to someone like you.

A/N: Helloooooo, this was a hard chapter to write, I’m not gonna lie. Alga’s dissociation is based off my own experiences with derealization and depersonalization, which made it hard to type out without accidentally making myself fall into the mindset. However, do not worry, my friends! I am fine, yay! I’m actually pretty proud over how I wrote their hashtag Episode. In an effort to convey just how disjointed time feels, along with their memory, I wrote events out of order in the first half. I hope it was conveyed well!

For anyone who didn’t catch it, Geta one hundred percent believed that the injuries on Alga’s hands were purposely self-inflicted. If they were, he would have assigned more praetorians to them and have them under supervision 25/8. Caracalla is clearly very attached and he’s not risking losing the only other person who can calm his brother. Speaking of Geta, I am sooooo sorry Geta enjoyers for the Caracalla wave we are under. Next chapter will have a major Geta moment, I swear to you.

And, finally, we can address the fact that Caracalla’s got a bit of a crush. It first manifested after the needle incident, stewing for a few days, and by the time he gives the needle back to Alga, it’s like a little sprout. After they calmed him down from his flashback, it’s a full ass rosebush. From how I’m writing it, I think it’s unfamiliar to Caracalla to have this particular feeling. He knows lust, but these feelings are far too innocent for him to really know what to do with. Like, of course He Wonts Them sooooo fucking bad, but also, he does just genuinely like being near them. It makes him feel giddy. It’s new and he may or may not be obsessed with how he feels when he gets to be near them.

During Alga’s episode, they are, uhhhh, way too out of it to truly understand the depth of Caracalla’s affections. Most of what he said in the gardens didn’t properly register, so they’re like both oblivious and aware as to how Caracalla is obsessed with them. It’s a mess. Also, he did NOOOOT mean for them to make him his medicine when he asked them to join him. Not in the SUH-LIGHTEST. Yesssss, come back to his bedroom so he can seduce you. You want to so bad, ooooooo.

Oh, and before I forget. Algacula is my attemot at making 'Alga' a diminutive petname. ‘Cula’ means little, and a lot of Latin petnames have that. Like melculum (little honey) and anaticula (little duck). Melimelum is another Latin petname that means “honey apple.” Most of Caracalla’s petnames tend to be overly sweet.

Finally, oh my god, thank you guys for the feedback last chapter!!! It was so sweet and I was rocking back and forth from sheer joy. Obligatory like, comment, and subscribe!!! You don’t have to, but I won’t lie. It does encourage me to write more 😭😭

Thank you for reading, bye, ily!!!!

taglist: @snazzynacho @t6gse370 @cherrysweets-world @justlibra @001mon

#emperor caracalla x you #emperor caracalla x reader #emperor geta x reader #emperor geta x you #gladiator 2 fanfiction

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cleolinda · 9 months ago

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@ the spinal clinic

Have spent 45 minutes filling out paperwork (they said come an hour early and that was fair). Air conditioning is negligible. Waiting room is full, everyone is twice my age, and someone smells like cigarettes. I look like I’ve run a marathon. We’re not at Threat Level: Muscle Relaxers yet, but I brought them.

Paperwork asked me if I have tried psychotherapy or prayer for pain. Never been asked that before.

Interesting: two older ladies talking about the assassination attempt in very Concerned Grandma tones. “I wonder if Trump’ll reconsider gun control now that someone’s come at HIM.” Did not expect a pro-gun control take in this Chili’s tonight.

#in ALABAMA #me for some reason #health #tribulations #us politics

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medicalinjury · 1 year ago

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Discussing the Associated Publicity When Opting to Pursue a Medical Negligence Case

In Australia, the publicity surrounding medical negligence cases is influenced by various factors. While some cases receive significant public attention, others remain private or less known. The level of publicity often hinges on factors such as the nature of the case, the parties involved, and the scope of litigation.

When a medical negligence case is filed in court, access to case records and hearings is subject to court regulations. Not all cases become public knowledge, as many individuals prefer to settle claims outside of court to maintain confidentiality and avoid public exposure.

Cases may attract publicity for various reasons, including their significance, impact on society, or broader implications beyond individual grievances. Instances involving widespread harm, public safety concerns, or those setting legal precedents tend to draw considerable attention, prompting public interest and discussion.

Publicity may increase if a case goes to trial, as court proceedings are generally matters of public record. Details discussed during trials can be accessible to the public, unless specific confidentiality orders are in place. Courts may use suppression orders or pseudonyms to protect identities, especially if disclosure could cause harm or distress. While some information remains inaccessible due to privacy and confidentiality provisions, media outlets may cover high-profile cases, contributing to their wider recognition.

Furthermore, certain organizations or advocacy groups may highlight specific cases to advocate for legal or systemic changes in the healthcare system. These efforts aim to address prevalent issues that may not always be widely recognized.

In summary, the extent of publicity for a medical negligence case in Australia depends on a combination of factors, including the case's nature, the parties involved, and its potential societal impact.

#medical negligence #medical injury law firm #healthcare law #clinical negligence #medical legel advisers #medical negligence expert #health lawyer #medical malpractice #medical legel adviser #medical negligence claim

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satsugacafe · 1 month ago

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𝐀𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐧 𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐀 𝐒𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞…

➳❥ 𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭: Aizen headcanon with reader who is his younger sister?will he keep her out of his plan, or vaguely update her? Will he make her play a role? Will he betray her if she's weak or does not go along with his plan or his viee of the world? Will he care for her? Be protective of her? Or just let her be on her own? Will he be gentle with her or indifferent towards her? If she's weak would he hold disdain/disappointment towards her? Will he spoil her? Or not even bother with her? Would he be an active borther in her life? Would she even know she has a brother?

➳❥ 𝐀/𝐍: I had a ball of a time writing this, though I feel so sorry for his sis 😔 (cuz not like I conjured this to be sad)

➳❥ 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Aizen by himself is a warning, negligence, loneliness, subtle threats

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 | 𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

˚₊‧꒰ა Aizen always had a knack for keeping secrets, and his younger sister was perhaps the best-kept one of all. Hardly anyone in Soul Society even knew you existed. He ensured it stayed that way—not out of shame or indifference, but because he understood the dangers of the world far better than most. Protecting you meant keeping you out of sight, out of reach, and most importantly, out of his way.

˚₊‧꒰ა You weren’t raised in the shadow of your brother’s ambitions. If anything, you were raised almost separately from him. Aizen made sure you were kept safe and comfortable, but he rarely visited in person. Letters arrived now and then, formal and distant, carefully worded so as not to betray too much. They were more akin to a noble’s formality than warm notes from a sibling.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Be well,” he would often sign off with, nothing more. No sentiment, no real concern, just a vague, clinical wish for your wellbeing. At least, that’s how it came across.

˚₊‧꒰ა Yet, despite his cold exterior, there was care buried beneath. You were one of the few people he did care for in his own way. That’s why he kept you in the dark about most of his plans. If you remained ignorant, you couldn’t interfere, and more importantly, you couldn’t be used against him.

˚₊‧꒰ა He never intended for you to play a role in his grand vision. You weren’t a pawn to be moved across the board. And in Aizen’s mind, you were more like a keepsake he kept locked away, safe from the chaos he intended to unleash on Soul Society.

˚₊‧꒰ა However, you weren’t blind to his true nature. You’d seen glimpses of it over the years—the way he could manipulate those around him with honeyed words, the calculated glint in his eyes when he spoke of Soul Society’s shortcomings. You suspected he wasn’t the dutiful Shinigami everyone believed him to be.

˚₊‧꒰ა “You’ve changed,” you remarked once when he finally visited you in person after years of silence. There was no warmth in his eyes, only a quiet calculation as he studied your, like he was assessing your usefulness.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Change is inevitable,” he replied smoothly, offering you a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “The world changes, and we must adapt accordingly.” You didn’t trust that smile. There was never a need to anymore.

˚₊‧꒰ა There was always a lingering question in your mind: would he discard you if you didn’t live up to his expectations? Were you too weak, too naive, too stubborn to follow him down whatever dark path he was walking?

˚₊‧꒰ა The answer wasn’t clear. Aizen wasn’t one to show disappointment openly, nor did he seem to hold people to impossible standards. Yet there was always a risk with him—the risk that he would decide whether or not you were a liability rather than an asset.

˚₊‧꒰ა In truth, he didn’t want your involved in his plans at all. He saw your as separate from the rest of the world he intended to reshape. You were a piece of his past, a reminder of a simpler time before his ambitions took root.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Stay out of this,” he told your once, his tone leaving no room for argument. “The path I’ve chosen is not one you need to walk.”

˚₊‧꒰ა “And if I don’t stay out of it?” you challenged.

˚₊‧꒰ა For a moment, something flickered in his gaze—irritation, perhaps, or frustration at your defiance. But then his expression softened, and he sighed.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Then you will make things far more difficult than they need to be,” he said quietly. “For both of us.”

˚₊‧꒰ა He wasn’t cruel to you. If anything, he was unusually gentle compared to how he treated others. He never raised his voice or spoke harshly. But there was always a distance between them, an invisible wall he maintained to keep your at arm’s length.

˚₊‧꒰ა If you showed signs of strength—spiritual pressure, combat ability, intelligence—he would acknowledge it with a nod or a rare word of praise. ��You’ve done well,” he might say, though his tone would remain detached. He wasn’t one to shower anyone with affection, not even his own sister. And it was mostly done to not provoke interest in furthering yourself to prove your worth.

˚₊‧꒰ა But if you proved weak or unwilling to grow stronger, he wouldn’t express disappointment outright. Instead, he would simply let your be, leaving your to your own devices. In his mind, it wasn’t his responsibility to push your beyond your limits. You had to choose that path yourself.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Strength is a choice,” he once told your during one of their rare conversations. “Those who seek it will find it. Those who don’t will be left behind.”

˚₊‧꒰ა Despite his aloofness, he was protective in his own way. If anyone dared to harm your or use your against him, they wouldn’t live to see another day. He would deal with them swiftly and without mercy.

˚₊‧꒰ა “You are one of the few things in this world I refuse to lose,” he admitted once, his voice uncharacteristically sincere. “Do not make me regret that.”

˚₊‧꒰ა You wasn’t sure how to feel about that. Was it a declaration of care, simply a warning to stay out of his way, or to behave?

˚₊‧꒰ა He never spoiled you. Gifts, affection, and indulgences weren’t his way of showing care. Instead, his protection was his way of expressing it. The fact that you remained alive and untouched by his enemies spoke volumes about how much he valued your, even if he rarely said it outright.

˚₊‧꒰ა Over time, you came to accept that your relationship would never be typical. Aizen wasn’t the sort of brother who would dote on your or offer emotional support. He was more like a distant guardian, always watching from the shadows, ensuring you remained safe even as he orchestrated his grand schemes.

˚₊‧꒰ა And yet, there were moments when you caught glimpses of the man he used to be—before his ambitions consumed him. Moments when he spoke softly, his tone free of the usual cold calculation.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Do you remember the fireflies?” he asked once, out of the blue, as you sat together under the night sky. You blinked, surprised by the sudden shift in conversation. “Of course. We used to catch them when we were children.”

˚₊‧꒰ა He nodded slowly, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Those were simpler times.” For a brief moment, he seemed human again—not the calculating mastermind plotting the downfall of Soul Society, but a brother reminiscing about their shared past.

˚₊‧꒰ა But it never lasted long. The warmth always faded, replaced by the cool, collected mask he wore so well. “Remember those times,” he told your quietly. “But don’t dwell on them. The world has changed, and so must we.”

˚₊‧꒰ა In the end, you knew that he cared for you in his own way. He would never abandon your completely, nor would he betray your trust outright. But he would always prioritise his goals above all else. You weren’t exempt from that.

˚₊‧꒰ა If you ever stood in his way, he wouldn’t hesitate to remove you from the equation—not out of hatred, but out of necessity.

˚₊‧꒰ა “Do not misunderstand me,” he said once as he looked you in the eye. “I will protect you. But I will not tolerate obstacles. Not even from you.” It was both a promise and a warning—a reminder that while he cared for your, his ambitions came first. Always.

𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @stygianoir @edensrose @spellboundsuguru @cactimorada @kennys-partner @cookielovesbook-akie @sovl-society

©satsugacafé 2025: no permission to repost, plagiarise, copy or translate my work onto any other platform or this one.

#˚₊‧꒰ა satsugacafé ໒꒱ ‧₊˚#aizen x sister!reader #aizen x reader #aizen x you #aizen x y/n #aizen sosuke x reader #aizen sosuke imagine #aizen sosuke scenario #aizen headcanons #bleach x reader #bleach x you #bleach imagines #bleach x y/n #bleach headcanons

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pilotingdreammsss · 11 days ago

Note

Think you could do red velvet with a veterinarian reader who has a cream lynx companion?

Hoo! That's new! Lovely idea anon! ^^

Check-up!

Premise: Red Velvet Cookie takes Chiffon for a check-up to a nearby veterinarian. He didn't expect a cute veterinarian, though!

Warnings: None, all slice of life stuff!

"Red Velvet Cookie and Chiffon?"

You call down the hall, your cream lynx situated at your foot. Your veterinary practice was sparsely busy today, it being midday, that was.. unusual.

A small, yapping cakehound follows a rather large, imposing cookie. Your cream lynx recoils and starts lowly growling at the sight. You immediately recognise him to be part of the Cookies of Darkness. However, you can't quite recall when you'd seen him before...

Though here, he seems non-threatening. You suppose he's just here to give his beloved cakehound.

"I'm here for a check-up for Chiffon."

He picks up the cakehound, though barely meets your eyes.

"Ah, come on in!"

You chirp, guiding Red Velvet Cookie right inside the room you'd usually conduct check-ups. Chiffon struggles a little in the hold, however, seems well-behaved otherwise.

"Place Chiffon on the raised table, I'll check for any missing crumbs or discolored icing."

Your cream lynx eyes the cakehound suspiciously as Chiffon is lowered onto the table. Though visibly nervous, he remains rather still as you examine him.

"You take pretty good care of him!"

You chirp, glancing up from the cakehound to it's owner. Your cream lynx trills in response and Red Velvet Cookie beams.

"Well, all my cake monsters are well cared for. I adore them all."

There's a newfound sense of pride present in his voice, with all the negligent cakehound owners that come into your veterinary clinic, a new face that took good care of them was refreshing.

"You must be a really responsible owner then!" You flash him a smile, and his dough darkens slightly.

You return to examining Chiffon, who seems to have minimal crumbling and pristine icing. A top-tier cakehound, you'd say. There's nothing interesting going on with him, so you decide to absentmindedly chat with his owner.

"Do you have any other pets?"

You quip, eyeing him slightly. He seems takenaback for a moment. However, regains his composure rather quickly.

"Several hundred cake monsters."

You hum in acknowledgment, slightly doubtful that he can handle them all.

"I doubt they're easy to handle..."

He looks deep in thought for a moment. Though as he says nothing, you wrap up the check-up by handing Chiffon a treat,kneeling down to also give your cream lynx companion one.

"Well, it was nice meeting you, good sir!"

You chime, and only now he picks up Chiffon.

"Hope to see you around!"

Red Velvet Cookie nods, averting his eyes to the floor. Chiffon licks his cheek and he laughs heartily, shaking the drool off his face.

"Yes yes, I'll surely see you around."

He bids you a quick goodbye, though your eyes meet once more before the door closes behind him. To which he speeds away once more.

The door clatters shut, and your cream lynx lovingly presses up against your legs. You reach down to pet the needy thing, mumbling to it affectionately.

"Quite the handsome stranger, isn't he?"

Your cream lynx purrs slightly, rubbing it's head against your hand.

"Good with cakehounds... handsomely dressed!"

Your pet doesn't seem to be all that interested in your new infatuation.

"Oh but what do you know, you're just a lynx!"

_____________________________________

"I think we'll visit that vet again, Chiffon..."

Chiffon yips in response. Red Velvet Cookie clears his throat as he feels the heat rise in his dough.

"Not for any reason at all."

A/N: Took a moment, but I suddenly got another request, so I got this one done too!

#cookie run kingdom fic #cookie run kingdom x reader #crk #crk x reader #my writing #crk x you #crk reader insert #crk fic #reader insert #request post #red velvet cookie x reader #red velvet cookie

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justinspoliticalcorner · 2 months ago

Text

Jessica Valenti at Abortion, Every Day:

For the past two years, we’ve watched Republicans push ‘abortion trafficking’ laws to restrict minors’ ability to leave their states for care. And for just as long, I’ve warned that this was never going to stop at teens—that what happens to young people today comes for the rest of us tomorrow. Well, tomorrow is here. Montana Republicans have introduced a first-of-its-kind bill that would criminalize women for getting certain out-of-state abortions, accusing them of ‘trafficking’ their own fetuses. And regardless of what happens in Montana, this bill has stark implications for the whole country. Republicans have broken a legislative seal—signaling that they’re coming for women’s right to travel. I’ll get into those national implications shortly—along with a hot tip about the group that may be behind the legislation—but first let’s talk about the bill itself.

Montana House Bill 609

House Bill 609 would criminalize anyone who leaves Montana to obtain an abortion that would be illegal within the state. An example: Montana only allows abortion after fetal ‘viability’ if the pregnant person’s life is at risk. That means if a woman learned at 26 weeks that her fetus had a fatal abnormality and got out-of-state care, she could be charged with ‘abortion trafficking’ for “transporting” her fetus across state lines.

It’s a clever way to punish women: Claim you’re not arresting them for the abortion, just for the ‘trafficking.’ (They’re trying this with ‘coercion,’ as well.) “Had a bill like this been law at the time, I wouldn’t just be a grieving mother, I’d be a felon,” Anne Angus tells me. The 35-year-old left Montana for an abortion in 2022, after her fetus was diagnosed with a fatal condition. She was 24 weeks pregnant—which was past the legal abortion window at the time. Under HB 609, she could have faced years in prison. “All for fleeing the state to give my son the compassion and dignity he deserved,” she says. Anyone who helped Angus could have been charged as well. Because Republicans are determined to chip away at community support, HB 609 criminalizes anyone who “aids or assists another person in transporting an unborn child.” That means a partner, a friend, even someone who chipped in for gas money could be arrested. It gets worse. There’s also a possibility1 that HB 609 would allow women who get out-of-state abortions to be charged with “deliberate, mitigated, or negligent homicide”—a crime punishable by up to 40 years in prison.

[...]

Though Montana voters recently passed a pro-choice ballot measure, it only protects abortion rights until ‘viability.’ HB 609 sidesteps that protection by targeting later abortions and others illegal under state law. As Stephanie McDowell, Executive Director of Bridgercare—which supports a network of 20 family planning clinics across Montana—told me, “We are seeing Republicans go after the loopholes that we left in these ballot initiatives.”

[...] And that’s the rub: HB 609 and the trial balloons that came before it aren’t just about punishing pregnant people, but establishing fetal personhood. Most conservatives propose legislation that let them dance around that unpopular position—even crafting policies they believe make them seem women-friendly. (Why admit you want an embryo to have more rights than a woman when you can just pass a bill mandating custody payments at fertilization?) But the slow creep of extremism is speeding up—and anti-abortion radicalism is being normalized along the way. HB 609 is being introduced alongside a wave of bills across multiple states that would charge abortion patients with murder. These so-called ‘equal protection’ laws are being pushed by an extremist faction of the anti-abortion movement that calls itself ‘abolitionists.’ And while Republicans like to pretend these activists are outliers, their legislation is gaining steam—and cosponsors—with every passing month.

Montana HB609, if passed, would become the first law in the US that would criminally charge women for “trafficking” for getting abortion out-of-state post-fetal viability. HB609 also criminalizes those proving aid in any form to a person obtaining abortion out-of-state.

This could be a sad harbinger of things to come.

#Montana HB609 #Montana #Abortion #Criminalization of Abortion #Homicide #Abortion Trafficking #Post Fetal Viability Abortion #Fetal Personhood #Abortion Bans #Abortion Abolition

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kittyscupcakeandbunny · 1 year ago

Text

CRAZY OVER YOU x MIN YOONGI

[HYBRID AU]

PART FOUR II

The truth untold

Side Characters: Namjoon/doctor, Seokjin/doctor, Taehyung/Hybrid Tiger, Jungkook/Bunny Hybrid, Hoseok/assistant, new character/Snake Hybrid, new character/unknown hybrid.

Warnings: Smut, mentions of blood, sharp objects, rut, beast behavior, yandere yoongi, possessive behavior, angst.

Genre: Fantasy, hybrids au, smut.

SUMMARY》 Yoongi is a black mamba hybrid one of rarest species of hybrids, who’s about to be put down due to his lack of interest in living. But everything changes after the new medical assistance (y/n) takes a liking to him. Meeting after meeting he realise his feelings for her are not the only thing growing.

< Previously Next Chapter >

____________________________________________

In the books they say black mambas have a distinct mating ritual and the males would even fight for the right to mate when a suitable female mate has been found, a common behavior among the snake hybrids we notice was that no matter the species the males would make a nest to Impress the female a sign he was ready to begin the mating ritual with her. Along the years was believed that behavior stared between hybrids since they no longer could fight for the female’s attention, so far nothing told us otherwise.

So far Yoongi has been presenting signs of heat, although I was sure of it it was all down the line once he told he in fact had no heat. Studies had shown that not all snakes hybrids had heat indeed but, it was so unusual to find one who fit in that category we never once thought Yoongi could be like one of those.

That could only mean everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with a put down procedure the entire clinic could get In trouble for negligence of the hybrids care, as bad as it may be it was a good chance for making the higher ups cancel the procedure, that way Yoongi will be able to be treated the right way and live.

I couldn’t help but feel a bit of hope bloom inside me, helping on Yoongis recover as now my biggest priority even though i had grew more than just a few feelings for him through this days we seen each other i must put them aside and focus on the matter at hand. Those are the thoughts on my mind as i push him slightly away, Interrupted by the sound of my cellphone ringing.

- let me take this… - I said stoping the kiss, he looked at me with heavy eyes but didn’t let me go.

Hands still holding tightly my waist as I breathless took my phone from my pocket, clearing my throat as i see Jin’s name on the caller. He must’ve had arrived already.

- yes? - I began taking the call.

- hey yn, i arrived already, just left Yoongis room and I sanded some cleaners to fix everything it should be done by the time you’re over with his bath i think - he said, before pausing a long sight leaves his mouth - I’m sorry about it all, can we talk once you’re done?

I couldn’t stay angry at Jin for much longer, i knew better that his father must’ve had passed the order for Yoongis prescription and keeping in mind how his father the director really didn’t care if he lived or died anymore I shouldn’t have lashed out on Jin either.

- of course Jin, we should discuss some other things too - i tell him, meaning we must do something about this whole situ at hand with Yoongi.

- I’ll wait for you in my office then, see you - he said.

- see you Jin.

I turned off the call staring up at the hybrid in front of me, he had a curious look on his face still racing my back with his fingers. I took in all of him for one last time every little detail on his face feeling his warm body so close to mine before i release myself from his embrace. Walking back to the closet i get him some clean clothes setting them over the table i turned back to the hybrid.

- you should get change now, we’ll head back to your room - i tell him - Jin told me it should be back to normal by now.

- you’re always leaving me for that director - Yoongi mumbled behind me.

- what? - I turned back to him handing him the clothes.

I watched as he folded them into his own hands, never looking at me as he chooses what piece to wear first a pout forming over his lips. Ever since we meet i notice how he seemed to slowly get closer and more comfortable around me, the more i tried not to think about much of how possessive he seemed to become the more clingy he showed himself to be. I knew this wasn’t the right thing to do, by giving in this burning feeling growing inside my chest i could put him in danger a well as my career here at the clinic. I have been irresponsible this entire time but things need to change from now, my own hormones some how have disrupted this behavior on him as he said himself not long ago before we both make the choice to give in. He didn’t have a fault in all of this, after all he’s just a hybrid it is completely normal for them if they are put in such situations but, I shouldn’t have let that happen. As his doctor it is my responsibility to take care of him and I failed miserably at it, relationships with a patient are completely forbidden.

I can’t keep doing this to Yoongi anymore, i must draw the line now before is too late. Soon he will meet someone like him and probably forget about all of this between us anyway, i just need to save him.

A long sight left my lips before i turn back as h dressed himself.

- i need to discuss with Jin about he stimulants - i said, hearing the sound of clothes - that’s all.

- just that? - he said, still mumbling the words.

I could hear the pout on his lips as he said it, a small smile forming on my own lips. For the smallest second i let myself forget about all of my responsibilities, letting that feeling of warmth sink in my chest. Yoongi never wanted me with anyone else but him at the clinic i liked that, to have someone want you so desperately but that was his instincts. It was a normal behavior for them to feel protective of their partner. For them any other male presence meant a risk of losing their partner, acting out was a normal way to express that they cared.

Ever since he opened up about his feelings and my presence seemed to be getting his own hormones disrupted by mine, things were a lot more clear to me. That wasn’t him, just an instinct.

All because i failed miserably to keep my distance.

- why? - i asked him.

- it would mean I have to fight for your attention - he said, this time closer to me.

His words had a lot more meaning to it then i wanted them to, i had no doubt he meant every single one of them. Its common for snake hybrids to fight for their potential partner to mate if they are dared to by another male, Yoongi must’ve had interpreted Jin’s presence as a threat and certainly mistook my presence as a female in heat. It is much uncommon for it to happened, I myself never saw a hybrid mate with a human before it was so unrealistic too, none of my coworkers had said anything about it in all the years I’ve been working here. It really did made me believe that this was all my own fault, a hybrid mating with a human never happened before.

There was never a possibility for such thing to happened, hybrids and humans never showed any signs of attraction for each other before there was no scientifical background done above that.

Why would Yoongi even be able to sense my hormones was still something I can’t understand, it’s such an unusual possibility I can’t bearly begin to make sense of it. I couldn’t help but feel guilt about it, my presence was just like the heat stimulants for him. Nothing good comes from side effects. I can’t keep doing that to him.

- you don’t have to fight for my attention - i tell him.

He took a deep breath before walking back to me closing the distance between us, I immediately took a set back and he eyed me up and down at my sudden reaction.

- you… - he scoffed - you’re really driving me crazy.

- its not my intention, sorry.

My words had more meaning then i intended too, it was too soon but i had to begin drawing the lines between us. Now with JIn so close to his appointments especially, it will be better for him since he will soon be able to meet his potential mate partner and as much as it might bother me to stand behind those lines I shouldn’t have crossed before, i must carry on my duties as his doctor only. There is no space for love or any sort of feelings between us, our worlds are completely different from one another. This was never supposed to happen anyway.

The walk back to his room was quiet, no one dared to say a word and the space between us was thicker the the silence around us. It was almost to much to bare, having him so close yet so far away I didn’t know if he already had somehow caught on my sudden change as we walked through the long white corridors, he never said anything. I knew some time i would have to tell him this wouldn’t happen between us again but, i kept praying he would just run for the other female without saying anything. Even if it hurts, i just thought it would be better for him to carry on without me.

From time to time I would catch him smirking at me, he would look at me up and down as he walked slowly behind me, not being able to control my own heart feeling the heat rising up to my face blushing hot at his stare each time, he made sure to walk close to me the entire time sometimes bumping into me.

For the time being i would jut ignore it, until its the right time to tell him the truth and put that line between us once and for all.

Once we finally reached his floor through the elevators we made our way to his room, as we got closer i notice someone standing in front of the door to his room soon realizing from the looks it was Hoseok who stood there. He looked up at us a worried expression on his face slowly turning into an angry one as his eyes fall over Yoongis figure behind me.

- why is he not in a collar? - Hoseok spat, not giving me a chance o speak first.

- stop it - I warned him, a sight leaving my lips feeling Yoongi getting closer behind me a protective hand closing around my wrist.

- you’ve been walking around with him like this, without a collar? - he said, a baffled chuckle leaving his lips - after all that happened this morning!?

- yes and he didn’t bite anyone - I tell him, bitting my lip angrily - honestly Hoseok I’m tired of you all misinterpret him.

- now you’re defending him?! - he spat, walking closer to me making Yoongi quickly push me back and taking the front standing between me and Hoseok.

Both males stared down at each other, the sight made me feel a mixture of anxiety and guilty. Knowing Yoongi was only acting out of instinct because he misunderstood completely our feelings, this was just another reminder of why i should’ve been drawing the lines between us.

- I don’t have time for this, I need to talk with Jin about this whole situation - I quickly interrupted, getting myself between both of them i took Yoongis arm into my hand.

- I’ll go with you then - Hoseok said, resting over the wall beside the door.

This wasn’t exactly how I wanted to clear things out with Jin about Yoongi, it was personal and I didn’t wanted to have Hoseok knowing anything especially with his sudden attitude now. Seeing as he wouldn’t move anytime soon i only sighted taking Yoongi back to his room, i closed the door behind us once we were inside alone. Taking a quick look around the room seeing as everything was indeed cleaned up and fixed, the bed in the center as usual and neatly done as well as the small table beside and the only closet in the corner.

He would be able to make a new nest now and rest knowing no more meds would have such drastic effect over him again, i saw how he looked around probably already thinking about it as well.

Any signs from earlier events were all cleaned and I could only sight in relief quickly making my way to the closets over the right wall getting a few more covers from it and putting over the bed, feeling the sharp eyes of the snake hybrid over me as i moved around the room once i though it was enough for him i turned back to him who stood close by the bed watching with curious dark eyes.

- i thought you might want this, for a new nest - I tell him.

I don’t know what about this sentence that makes him blush so hard, he looks so adorable like that. I take in a mental picture of this look, soon i won’t be seeing him like that anymore but i shake off any bitter feelings from it. Treasuring this small moment, he mumbles a “thank you” and i begin to make my way out.

- I’ll be back later - I tel him before leaving.

Not looking back as i did so, the door felt heavier then it ever did. After everything that happened I couldn’t hold back the switch i felt once i made the decision, like that line was already drawn between us and he just didn’t know yet.

I took a deep breath after closing it completely, Hoseok presence beside me was a heavy cold bucket of water. I couldn’t blame him for his reaction, everyone seemed to be a little sensitive lately especially since all the events this morning. Safety protocols exist for a reason and as much as i hated to admit, it was wrong of me for taking Yoongi out without a collar on I shouldn’t have risked more even, essa especially when it had not been too long since he was acting that way.

- shall we? - he said, impatiently.

I only nodded letting him lead the way, guilty was weighing over me more then it ever did.

I knew Hoseok wasn’t happy with my decisions lately, he always been a brother to me and deep down he was just worried for me. I wasn’t exactly the smarted when it came to helping the hybrids, no matter how aggressive they would get i would always make sure to get the job done. There was not a single hybrid I treated that was continuously aggressive once i treated them, it is not their fault to act that way, after all, most of the times they are acting out of fear of getting hurt. Most doctors here don’t even try to get close to them when they are in such state, but I didn’t really liked letting the security handle them whenever those things happened. Just like the tiger hybrid was brought here, I made the mistake of using a small dose of tranquilizer and got hurt. Things like that can happen to any one here, that was why I always took charge of them. Deep down i knew i was part of the small portion of people here who truly wasn’t afraid of them.

Things can get ugly at any time, i wanted Hoseok to know that and stop being so angry about it with me because of it. He always seemed to think of me as a weak person, i got hurt and went back to work that’s how it always had been but lately he just seemed to be over reacting every time.

By the time we got in Jin’s office, the tension between us was thick enough to be cut in the middle with a knife as we both sat quietly in front of seokjins desk, the three of us only stared at each other for a couple of minutes after we got here no one even said a word.

Knowing Jin he was probably trying to figure out what had happened in the meantime for us to be in such situation, his eyes going back and forth between us. Hoseok was ready to set everything over the table, from the way he was heavily breathing beside me i could tell he was still angry at me.

- well… - Jin began, cleaning his throat.

- should i start? - i said, feeling the man beside me burn even more.

- please do - Hoseok spat, turning to me with anger over his eyes.

I swallowed hard, I’ve never been under this stare of his. It definitely pained me more then i wished it did. I took a deep breath before I start.

- I understand Yoongis behavior this morning was not one of the bests…. - I said, making Hoseok scoff beside me.

- yes, we talked over the phone about it for a bit - Jin commented.

- and we came to the conclusion that, such dose of heat stimulants could have side effects… - I said - after talking with Yoongi it was clear to me that this dose everyday was making him sick to the point he was so uncomfortable it made him lose control today.

- I understand - Jin said - I already made a few calls and since you commented before he’s been giving signs of heat they called off completely the meds.

At the mention of his heat Yoongis words went through my mind again, his sudden confession for not heaving a heat was something we had to discuss now. It might also be the cause to his side effects from taking the heat stimulants, when hybrids used to be put under the drugs they should give signs of heat as soon as they take the first dose but Yoongi only started to give signs lately under a big dose. All could only tell he wasn’t being affected even the slightest bit positive by the drugs because there was no heat happening to begin with, which could only resolve in a bad side effect.

- he’s not in heat - I stated, finally bringing a surprise reaction from Jin.

- what? - Jin nervously asked, a chuckle leaving his lips as if not believing me.

- i talked to him about it today, he told me he doesn’t go into heat - I explain - from what I can tell, he only mates to reproduce but we should take new exams to make sure.

There is a moment of silence between us three, Jin seems to be deep in thought probably going over everything to make a conclusion out of this. As much as it could help Yoongis situation, him not having heat meant more exams would have to be taking on him which would only trouble the procedures for his mating and we would need the directors approval first. He could state it is not necessary and we wouldn’t be able to do anything and Yoongi would still have to be put under the drugs again, if Jin convince his father we might be able to save him.

The information he gave us would be crucial to stop his put down, even thought it was just a hybrids heat cycle it would meant the director wouldn’t have much choice but proceed with new exams and procedures for Yoongi and depending on his results he wouldn’t have to be put down anymore.

I felt hope growing inside my chest at the thought of it

- I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking Jin - i tell him, immediately capturing his attention. There was a small smile over his lips as he looked over me.

- I’ll talk with the director and get the permission immediately - he said - it’ll take some time and we must take the exams first, by the time he has to meet the female snake we should have it all settle though.

- wait - Hoseok interrupted - so what does all of his weird behaviors come from?

- probably side effects of the drug hes been taking - i said, keeping short Hoseok wasn’t from the same unit as me things like this were unusual for him - hell be clean from it by Monday.

- yes….- Jin sighted - I understand my mistake and it seems y/n has a way with him no one here does so, I trust you to keep taking good care of him.

- as long as she fallows the protocols - Hoseok said.

- what is this about now? - Jin asked.

- I took him to bath and brought him back without a collar - I said honestly.

- y/n…. You’ll give me grey hairs - Jin said holding his temple - please fallow the protocols, i understand but…

- I will, sorry -I tell him - can we talk alone for a moment Jin?

- oh, yes - Jin looks over to me - what is it?

I wait until Hoseok leaves before i tuner my focus back to Jin, the time until were finally alone i kept thinking and rethinking how to even begin with all of this.

- so what is it y/n, you seem a bit worried? - Jin said, getting up from his seat in front of me to take the one were Hoseok sat before.

- It’s just, this whole situation with Yoongi and what he told me about not having a heat - i began - I can’t help but think that, everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with this procedure the entire clinic could get in trouble for negligence of the hybrids care.

- I know, i was thinking about this too - he said - to be honest with you y/n i notice that after reading his old documents, Yoongi has been indeed been mistreated.

His words immediately stole my breath away. This was much more then i thought it was, it made me question more and more if all this time his behavior wasn’t just an act of rebellion on the clinic but rather tiredness and anger from being treated wrongly this whole time. While everyone thought of him as an asshole, he only acted that way because people have been unfair towards him. That made my blood boil.

- It’s been that way since he was brought here - Jin stated, a sight leaving his lips - i only recently found out about it, not much exams were taken of him for his well being but for scientific purposes. They’ve been testing on him for years until he became… well the hybrid we know now.

- Jin… - I helpless said - what are you telling me now?

- You know exactly what I’m saying…. - i could see his eyes shining like never before - trust me, no one hates this more then me right now.

He had tears older his eyes before he quickly got up and walk back to his desk, Jin hated to be seen like that and it took me a few seconds to realize the meaning under his sudden confession.

They don’t intend to save Yoongi no matter what, its all a set up to hide what they have been doing all this years to him.

- i wont give up that easily - i stated to him - tell your father i said that.

- I won’t either y/n - he said, i could see the determination under his features and that encouraged me even more.

- lets get things right with Yoongi first, before his meeting with the female hybrid - i tell him.

- I’ll take care of it immediately y/n, I’m running a few call already things should start soon.

- ok.

I got up from the seat and made my way to leave.

I could bearly begin to digest all the information that Jin just told me, I couldn’t believe such thing was happening right under my nose at the clinic. All of those years he’s been enduring god knows how many testes done to him without his consent, the more I thought about the more i began to think that maybe the guy he bit that time deserved all of it.

His behavior started to make more sense to me, this whole time he was in defensive mode, even with me. Just like the tiger hybrid i treated that day, Yoongi was also been through so much and he never had a chance to stop it.

I couldn’t help but think about his words, “please, tell me you’re not one of them”. At that time it didn’t made much sense to me but now, feeling this heavy weight on my chest the burning sensation under my eyes.

By the time i left Jin’s office i was bitting into my lip to hold my sobs from leaving my mouth, once i was inside the elevator i could bearly hold it back. It just pained me so much to know it, how hurt he must been all of this years all alone. No one knew it and the ones who did knew never said anything, not did they ever tried to help him.

I didn’t know what to do with all of this information, i just knew that now more then ever i wanted to be with him. After all of this time i was the only one Yoongi didn’t felt threatened by and finally i could understand what he meant all this time, before i could clear things out with him i had to pull myself together. There was more to do then i thought, I don’t have time to cry now i had to save him. I never leave any patient behind, I won’t leave him too.

Feeling the anger dripping out my skin I began to hate even the walls of the clinic and everyone here, anger boiling over me at Jin’s father for allowing all of this to happen and then just try to cover it all with all this stupid procedure but still force him to mate just to keep doing those experiments with another hybrid, i doubt they would wait for the hybrid to even grow up before they begin.

When the door of the elevator opened I made my way through the corridor without a single thought in mind, soon stoping in front of the door i put on the code to get in.

My body is hit by the hot temperature wave of his room already used to it by know, my hands are shaking by my sides once I see him already in his bed. I could tell from the looks over the messy bed he had already done a nest on it, sitting down over the mess of covers he looks up to me as i make my way towards him not wasting a second. He had a smile over his soft features but, quickly turning into a confused expression once he took in how i looked.

I don’t blame him, my face probably looked much puffier now since I’ve been crying on the elevators till i got here. I felt sick of it all, just for that moment i wanted to be just us not a doctor and a patient. Not a hybrid and a human. Just us.

Without thinking twice i took his hand in mine pulling him up as i close my arms around his neck, bitting into my lower lip to hold more tears from falling as i take in his smell.

How could they do this to him?

- what happened y/n? - he softly asked into my neck, arms closing around me just as strong as i held into him.

- I’m not one of them - i mumbled - I’m not like them…

As the words spilled from my mouth i held him tighter on my arms, noticing how his whole body went stiff realizing i knew everything. He tried to lean back but i only held him tighter, i couldn’t look into his face now i would only brake into tears if i did so, not being able to see anything but all the things they might have done to him.

He didn’t push me away after that, we kept ourselves like that for a while until he moved slightly away but I didn’t look into his face yet keeping my eyes over his exposed collar bones.

- you know…. - he began - y/n, please don’t cry I’m fine now.

- no… don’t say that - I murmured - Yoongi they’ll…

I stoped immediately from continuing, I didn’t know if now was the best moment to tell him the truth for all of this. I could bearly even say it out loud what would happen to him.

- what did they to you?

My voice was bearly a whisper, i couldn’t take that thought out of my mind. Why would they do such thing to him?

For another moment we didn’t spoke any words, he held me against him as he began to walk backwards till he reached to bed pulling myself with him as he sat down over it keeping me on his lap as his hands traced my back.

- it doesn’t matter what they did to me y/n…. - he whispered, hand holding my chin up to meet his face - i have you now, its more then I could ever ask for.

- dont say that… I’m not what you need - i tell him.

- but i want you - he said, his words sanding a chill down my spine - you should know that.

I wanted to tell him he was wrong, the was just the hormones speaking. That he needed was in fact the female hybrid and not me, a mare human. Another reason for us to not be together like this anymore, but just for today i allowed myself to be selfish again for just one more time I’ll stay in his arms.

[…]

Things didn’t got much brighter after that. I wished they did but it wasn’t that easy, Jin has been in a meeting with his father over the phone the entire morning to discuss about Yoongis future. He only told me he would be busy with that before the meeting started to inform me that he wouldn’t be able to participate in todays procedures with Yoongi, things were not exactly easy since his father was the one behind everything. Much later i found out Jin left the clinic to talk personally with his father, i began to worry even more about it.

I tried not to let show as i continued to work, when i left Yoongis room after barging in crying i had set in my mind that i would do everything to save him. If i have to give up on us to save him, i will. If someone mistreat him again I’ll put them on their place immediately, this is supposed to be a clinic to save and help hybrids recover not some crazy lab to experiment on those pure beings. They have been through enough already.

Since Namjoon was in charge of the treatment of the female hybrid i was the one in charge of checking their new room were they would be able to meet for the first time and began the mating process, as every hybrid have their own unique traits a separate space is created to accommodate their needs during matings to ensure a safe environment for both as they go through an important transition with their partner.

We had a few hybrids already in mating process, rehabilitation sometimes take longer for them and we cannot put them immediately into mating process as that can also make it harder for them to chose a partner. Our first priority is their safety and well being no matter what.

With Yoongis case I didn’t felt any different in that matter and the fact that this entire procedure to make him mate in the hopes that the clinic can keep his specie alive made me sick, if he was sick it would been a complete different scenario but since his healthy and the only side effect is his skin condition it doesn’t sit right with me to carry on this assignment, knowing the entire truth about the director and the things the clinic made him go through all this years kept making my stomach turn back and forth. I felt more inclined to save him even more now, no matter what.

The seventh floor was were the mating rooms were at, once i got there I quickly made my way towards the room assigned for Yoongi. The identification for it was YK10391Q, looking over the identifications on each door as i walked down the long white corridor it was separated by alphabetical order and his was on the few last ones. Every room had a separate entrance to a small room beside theirs were we usually stay to make sure the hybrids are well while they mate, everything is monitored by a medical team and the hybrids doctor on the first days before they began mating in case any problems occur. Anything can happen while they are alone there, in the past cases a few hybrids got a bit overwhelmed and ended up hurting their mate pretty badly and had to be quickly separated. They are given the privacy needed for their mating process but we always ensure everything is safe for them to enjoy such precious moment together. Nobody watches them but if something happens we must be there to assist them.

Yoongis room wasn’t much different from his right now, the temperature was high enough to make them comfortable and the lights were not as bright since their vision is very sensitive. There was a round bed in a corner covered with white heavy covers, on the other side close to it was a small bath tub still being installed.

- miss. Yn - said a male voice behind me.

I quickly turned noticing a man with a few papers in hand entering the room, he wore a yellow cap and by his uniform he must the one in charge of the design of the the room.

- hello sir.

- are you here to check the room of the patient doctor? - he asked.

- yes, are you the one in charge?

- I’m doctor, is everything to your liking? - he said while making his way towards the bathtub.

I took another glance around.

- the temperature is good as well as the lights here but, it’ll need more covers on the bed for a nest and could change the sheets for some silk, he has very sensitive skin it could be a little irritating for him - i said watching the man take a few notes.

- that wont be a problem miss, something else?

- ah yes, this bathtub how is going to be?

- just simple with a system for hot water and there will be put a small water fall in that corner as well as some lavender plants around, doctor Namjoon requested for the female since it helps her calm down.

- that’s good then - i tell him - for now that’s all i have in mind, when will it be done?

- it should be all done by today.

- okay, thank you.

With that i left the room.

We would be able to move Yoongi to the mating room today then, that was good since his mating would began on Monday. With him being able to be in his new room before anything we could still rearrange anything he might need.

Checking the clock on the elevator as i made my way to the first floor, seeing as i still had time before Yoongis lunch so i made the decision to check my patients before. Some normal and non eventful duties to clear my mind now is what i needed to get back in track.

I decided to check back on the tiger hybrid from yesterday, it hasn’t been a long time since i saw him so i should check his exams before making anymore procedures with him.

I took his files from the exam room noticing a few people were there a the moment, I complimented them before taking the files i needed and leaving for the hybrids room.

[…]

Yoongi - POV

I could still smell her scent on my clothes, ever since she left to continue her duties at the clinic after telling me she now knew everything. Part of me wished she didn’t know that, another small part of me was happy someone finally knew what they did to me and the fact that it was her brought some comfort to me but at the same time I couldn’t help but wonder if behind all of that she just pitted me.

No one has ever been this kind and understanding of me my whole existence, i was put on testes ever since I learned how to walk. They would take pieces of my skin, draw blood of me all the damn time. Not to mention the pain every time they tied me up in that bed to use chemicals on me, trying to test my scale’s capabilities of endurance, regeneration and so on. It became so much i could bearly eat anymore, it hasn’t been much long since they had finally stoped those tests.

Things felt different ever since these two new doctors began treating me, i never had a female doctor before. Never new why. She was the first one to treat me and I couldn’t help but feel embraced by her presence every time she comes in.

I had always hated the males in this clinic, they never showed me kindness even when i was a child. I wondered if all this time I wasn’t assigned a famele doctor on purpose, just to be mistreated by those men on purpose.

For all those years i had been in survival mode, leaning to adapt to stay alive but things seemed to have changed since yn came here. These two were not treating me for no reason, after being left alone to rot in here for so long their sudden appearance was not goin g unnoticed by me. I knew that she was hidden something from me, but Yn wasn’t like the other she would tell me when the time is right. I know she will.

Looking up at the dark ceiling of my room feeling the warm temperature surrounding me softly, touching my body through the silk. My skin felt so much better now with yn baths, for a long time i had simply given up on my shadding but I couldn’t do that anymore.

I had to look good for her, it was a given how fast i could heal my body. No one knew about that, even after all the tests they had put me under i still manage to hide everything about me from them. There was still a few things i had to hide from yn as well, i dont know how much longer i can keep this up though.

No wonder all those males doctors are always surrounding her all the damn time, her scent seemed to be all over the room even after she left. It continued to drive me completely insane, I wondered for how much longer will i have to keep this up with all the mating process she wants me to go through before i can finally take her.

I have a feeling those males she calls friends are trying to test my patience, not only do i have to worry about them but her other patients. That bunny was really asking to be eaten alive when he scented her, the more I thought about such thing happening the more anger boiled over me.

Did she liked that? How was he touching her? Is that the kind of hybrid she likes?

How dare her test me like this, i could feel my entire body vibrates with rage again. But quickly brushed off the best i could. I was lucky about the heat stimulants the first time, if i lash out again today i dont know how ill be able to get myself out of it again.

I hated to lie to her but, since she was also hiding things from me it was only fair.

Spreading myself over the soft surface of my new nest i let the warm temperature embrace by body comforting me into a deep thought.

- y/n…

Her name left my lips like honey, i could stil taste her from this morning.

It didn’t seem to be the right choice to mate with her but, after spending time with her and being around her I didn’t care if it wasn’t right anymore whenever I was with her every cell in my body called for her. After tasting her I knew she was ready for me, her scent was dripping from every inch on her skin a silent call for me to be with her only I could sense it.

She’s been considerate enough to get more covers four nest, I couldn’t believe when she did that. No one has ever asked for me to make a nest before, y/n was the one I wanted my mind wouldn’t change about that.

I needed her so desperately, I can’t take anymore crumbs from her. I need to feel her skin completely, every centimeter of her same beautiful body against mine. Her soft breaths as she can bearly hold heel self form the pleasure.

Spreading my arms above my head as the image of her beautiful face filled my mind, the ghost of her fingers around my neck were enough to make me go insane.

Even the silk covering my skin was unbearable in that moment, a feeling of numbness in my mind as her scent kept filling my lunges. I bite into my bottom lip tasting my own poison as I harshly ripped open my shirt, not being able to even control my movements any longer. Lifting it up to my nose to feel her scent better, it was so sweet i wanted to cry.

Hips moving up and down the more i thought about her body against mine this morning, how breathless she was under my touch, how delicate her skin feels.

I let that thought drive me completely out of my sanity in that dark room again.

[…]

Y/n - POV

By the time I was done checking on Jungkook the bunny hybrid again, i was restlessly making my way to the kitchen to get Yoongis meal. Jin didn’t call me but sanded a massage instead telling me to carry on the assignments without him. Nothing else, no words were needed anyway. I knew he was still talking with his father trying his best to convince him about Yoongi, i sighted watchim his food being prepared this was taking much longer then I thought it would. I just hope he gets in his father head to make the right decision for Yoongi, after all those years he deserves to be treated the right way.

I thanked the lady after she hands me the silver tray with Yoongis food, quickly making my way to his floor. I notice this time the food wasn’t just fruits but some nicely cut kimbab, the fact that they starved him all this years was a pinch to my heart. But now things will slowly start to go back to their right way, usually all the hybrids eat together at the cafeteria with a few exceptions for especial cases as we always ensure their safety and let them socialize with each other which is just as important for them. You can’t just lock them up in their rooms till they are fully recovered.

As i watched the numbers on the elevator go up i felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and carefully reach for it with one hand, seeing a massage from one of my colleagues informing that Yoongis mating room was all set. A sight of relief left my lips, thankfully I’ll be able to set Yoongi on his room before Monday. Since tomorrow is my rest day i won’t be working and will only be at the clinic Monday, the fact that I’ll be able to take him to his room brought some comfort to my mind. I didn’t wanted anything to happen while I wasn’t here and knowing Yoongi didn’t felt comfortable around the other doctor was not a thought that brought a pleasant feeling at all. Especially now that I know more about what happened to him, i felt even more protective of him. Not knowing if they would care for him nicely or continue to mistreat him.

Once the door of the elevator opened at his floor I quickly made my way through the long corridor toward his room, i had so much going on in my mind I didn’t know where to start with it. I knew i wanted to do but if Jin’s father don’t agree with us i could lose Yoongi forever, that thought was not the most pleasant to bear. I didn’t know what i was capable of doing if that ever happen, it didn’t help my nerves how Jin hasn’t returned any of my calls or massages.

For now i must carry on with Yoongis appointment as if nothing happened, until i can tell him the truth. He’s aware of the fact that i know what happened to him at the clinic, trying to carry on now as if I didn’t know or nothing happen was not what i wanted too.

With a long sight i opened the door to his room, ready to continue with this till the end whatever it might take to save him.

As the door closed behind me i waited until all the lights of the room were back on, felling the hot temperature of the room immediately embrace my entire body cold from the air outside. Walking closer to his bed were seeing as he was laying down upon noticing my presence he slowly lifted his upper body up.

Dark eyes staring into mine tiredly, almost immediately making my heart skip a beat.

I stared at him confused seeing his shirt ripped open on his body, exposing his chest completely as he just looked up at me with dark glossy eyes. I never saw such look on his face before, his eyes never looked so dark that his entire pupil was almost covering his entire eye, his chest moved up and down fast, sweat dripping down from his neck the ends of his hair wet from it.

I carefully placed the tray on the table over the side before quickly making my way towards the small cabinet on the right. Taking a new shirt and a towel with me stoping beside him, he slowly sits up completely as i begin to dry some of the sweat on his neck.

- did something happened, you look… bad? - i ask him carefully, worry filling every muscle in my body.

- I’m fine… - he mumbles, taking the towel from my hands to dry his face.

- are you sure?

- yes, y/n - he said, turning towards me as he takes of the shirt to replace for the new one i had in my hands - its just hot… can i have some water?

- oh, of course - I quickly got up to take the cup with water on his tray, turning around back to give him it.

He drank the water in big gulps, chest moving up and down faster as he finish it holding the glass over his knee as he looked down. I notice his eyes were slowly going back, still dark like a night sky but not like before. I sit back beside him, taking the glass from his hand to put it on the floor as I watched his motions. He looked exhausted as if he had run a marathon, i wondered what might have happened while i was gone.

I didn’t like to see him like this, i knew it was time for me to began setting boundaries and lines between us but, when i saw him like that i couldn’t help how i felt.

- hey… Yoongi - I carefully brushed a strand of hair out his face, gasping as he suddenly leaned down over my shoulder resting his face on my neck.

- you smell so good today… - he groaned over my skin, one arm closing above my legs as he leaned more against me.

I immediately went under panicking, there was a moment to draw a line. Set some boundaries Y/n.

- i brought you some food - I quickly changed the topic, taking his arm from around my waist as i got up.

Cleaning my throat while i take the tray with food with me, sitting back beside him this time i put the tray between us to create some space. I noticed how he looked at it for a moment then back up at me.

- you can’t eat only fruits for the rest of your life - i tell him - so, to start small and simple some kimbab. It’s really good and healthy, its made with vegetables and some tuna rolled up on rice. Here try some, eat slowly so you dont get an upset stomach.

I held one roll up for him to take it, he carefully holds before his nose smelling it before he takes a small bit of it a few pieces falling over his chest in the process.

- oh, no… - I chuckled slightly at his face once he realizes the mess he made - you’re like a kid eating.

Out of habit i took a napkin quickly cleaning the new shirt i gave him from the sauce it dripping on it, leaning closer to him as i cleaned his chin. He watched me quietly, not moving an inch until i lean back clearing my throat.

- so do you like it? - i ask him, swallowing the nervousness back inside.

He just takes another roll and put the entire thing on his mouth, looking at the food between us. Redness rising over his checks as i looked at him astonished.

He never looked so nervous before, what it is happening right now?

Confused i filled another cup with water for him handing it towards him as he took it sill not looking my way, he swallowed the food before taking a big gulp of water.

- sorry… - he said, looking up at me - I’m just… feeling bit hungry now.

- oh - the sound came out of my lips more surprised then I intended to - well eat more then but, slowly this time.

He just nodded before taking another roll and biting into it. For a long moment he just eat slowly and quietly, our eyes would meet from time to time whenever he wanted more water.

- you’re not… - he said after some time - you won’t ask about what happened earlier?

- well, i know enough… to be honest Yoongi, i dont want to make you go through all of that again just to tell me.

He nodded. I took the tray from the bed putting it over the table, we still had som time before i have to go home.

- right, your knew room is ready - i tell him, turning back to him noticing he sat in a more comfortable way resting on his arms.

- knew room?

- all hybrids are put in a special room for the mating process - I explained.

- oh, right… that thing - his face seemed to darkened as he realized what i was talking about.

- we still have some time so i would like to take you there today - i tell him.

- does it have to be today?

- yes, I’m not… i dont work at the clinic tomorrow.

- you dont?

- no Sunday is my rest day, I wasn’t even supposed to be working this afternoon.

- oh, sorry for making you work more.

- this is nothing, - i tell him - besides i like being with you.

- you do?

I nodded giving him a small smile. He gave me another smile in return, looking more relaxed now.

After everything that happened this morning I knew better then to overstep the protocols again with Yoongi, since he didn’t have a good history I assumed he was put on Red code for his attacks although I knew he didn’t meant to hurt anyone he would still have to be put on a collar before going out. On a small compartment beside the hybrids door its their collar for when is needed, all red coded hybrids had it, quickly making my way there typing the code to open the compartment i took the small metal collar. Turning back to him as he slowly walked to me.

- lets go see your new room?

- i dont have much of a choice do i? - he mumbles once he stood in front of me.

His mention brought a sense of discomfort to me, he didn’t have any. And i hated that more then he could imagine.

- sorry…

I looked up at him, his sudden apology bringing my attention back to him as i closed the collar around his neck.

- dont be, you’re right…. - i sighted - i won’t let them hurt you anymore Yoongi. Know that.

I wanted to make sure he knew that. After all I was here to save him, the reason why I chose to be a hybrids doctor was to help this new specie that fell misunderstood by so many when it wasn’t even their fault.

Knowing Yoongis past made me feel uneasy, not for him but now I felt even more pressure to make sure he’s well. Just the thought of being like one of those people from his past that mistreated him so badly made me sick to my stomach.

In just a few days Yoongi managed to completely steal my heart for him, ever since I meet him I’ve been trying my best to ignore those feelings growing inside of my chest. But the closer we got to each other the more I couldn’t let go of him, today wasn’t any different.

- let’s go see your room then - I breathed out.

He gave me a small smile before I opened the door for us to leave. I didn’t felt comfortable having to put him in a collar again, everything just felt so unfair ever since Jin told me about his past in the clinic. I felt like I should be even more careful with him now.

My entire career was dedicated to help hybrids who have been mistreated and unwell, I knew that even though he seemed fine on the outside he must’ve not feel the same on the inside.

He walked close to me as we made our way down the hall towards the elevators, no one said a words as we walked letting the comfortable silence fill the air around us. I notice how we were the only ones on this floor for that moment, but weekends are usual like this and if no special call are made for rescued hybrids the whole day goes by calmly.

I was grateful for days like this at work, it meant the hybrids were well and that was all I wanted for them.

It didn’t took much longer for the doors to the elevators to opened to the seventh floor, I walked out being fallowed by Yoongi who grabbed the back of my coat as we made our way through the long corridor till his own room.

I swallowed nervously, every hour that went through was a clear reminder that my time with him was going to end. I know I needed to set the line between us and stop this before it gets out of hand, it was hard enough already and Yoongi didn’t make it any easier to me.

Now that all was left was a day before he meets the female snake hybrid, I felt even more uneasy knowing he will soon be with someone who’s just like him and can fulfill his needs better.

There is reason why hybrids and humans didn’t work out together and why there has never been a single case like this happening, hybrids can only mate with other hybrids even though they are half humans. We can’t sustain a connection with their hormones to reproduce, for that reason, they don’t feel attracted to us at all.

I couldn’t understand how Yoongi could tell I was ovulating or how that seemed to wake something on him but, it happened. I could already feel the heat growing on my checks the more I thought about. Was I so hot and bother by his male presence that I lost a bit of control?

Shaking this thoughts away as we finally stopped in front of the door to his new room, i quickly typed his code on the digital panel on the wall. Making my way inside the room as the door opened for us, the room now had the same light effect from his old one.

I closed the door behind us as the lights slowly began to turn up above us, it would stay turned off like he was used to but slightly shining on a more warm low tone to make the room more cozy for them.

I watched as he slowly began to walk around the room inspecting every corner of it, he first walked towards the bathtub on the right corner occupying almost the entire wall as a small water fall with lavender flowers and some blue ivy’s surrounded them, a bit of steam flowing up from the water as it continued to fill up indicating it was warm.

He then made his way towards the bed on the other side, checking the extra covers on it with his fingers.

This room wasn’t as big as his other one, but it was made sure that the bed was spacious enough for them as well as the bathtub I see now. I knew for a fact he would love that for sure.

- what do you think? - I ask him, making my way towards him - is there anything you don’t like? We can change it up for you.

- it’s… nice - he murmured, turned back to me.

- that’s good to hear - I tell him - if you feel like you might need something more, just tell me and I’ll get it ready for you.

- can I get you here? - he took another step in my way closing the distance between us.

- that’s not… I mean-

- you said anything? - he interrupted, turning his head slightly to the side furring his eyebrows as he stared at me with those dark orbs.

- I meant for the room, the… you know - I couldn’t form a single straight word as I kept looking into his eyes, heat washing up on my checks the more hi stared and a smirk lift his lips up.

He chuckled leaning towards me, making me immediately hold my breath. His eyes locked with mine as he held my chin between his fingers, thumb slightly brushing over my bottom lip.

I was once again completely under his spell, it was almost unfair how easily he could have me wrap around his finger with only a few touches and sweet nothings. For a hybrid he sure knew how to lure humans into him, but to say he was not attractive would be a lie.

Yoongi was without a doubt the most beautiful being I’ve ever seen in my life, it didn’t took a genius to see his beauty was something completely different then anything in this world, he looked dreamy in every way. Like the ocean beautiful and filled with mysteries.

Almost human looking if not for his beautiful scales over his neck that shined a mix of white and lilac like a pearl. Almost unnoticeable at how softly they were on his body, shining so beautifully under the lights making him look even more unreal. Some would think a black mamba snake hybrid shouldn’t look like this, Yoongi sure was one of the rarest specie we had in our clinic. Black mambas aren’t truly colored black as many would think, the animal name comes from the black colored inside of their mouths and eyes and their body is of a grayish color. You could tell the similarities on him from his eyes, black like the night sky and the soft gray of his scales that only shined a upon light. Yoongi had no warm tone on his body, were his skin wasn’t covered in grayish scales he was so pale some would think he was sick but that was just another thing that made him even more special.

I stoped him from leaning in more with my hand over his chest feeling how his breathing has quickened as it moved up and down under my hand, swallowing nervously as i looked up into his eyes. His expression didn’t change a bit at my movements, he licked his bottom lip before turning his head slightly to the other side bring his hand up to cover mine on his chest pushing down against him and stoping over his hip.

- let me bite you again - he said in a whisper immediately stealing my breath away.

- what?

- please… i don’t think i can do this anymore y/n - he murmured, as if he was in pain.

Before i could say anything he pulled me against his body complete with his other arm, circling around my waist burying his face on my neck a gasp leaves my lips as i feel his hand sliding up my back under my coat stoping at the back of my neck.

My own hands holding him by the arms trying to put some distance between us but failing completely, i tried again at the feeling of his fangs over the skin of my neck brushing over it every so slightly.

- please… i wont hurt you i promise - he whispered above my ear lips brushing against it.

- i don’t… i - no words would come out of my mind to make any sense of this.

The more I felt his hands all over me again, the more my body seemed to gave in his words. Every inch of skin he traced with his fingers left a path of heat on my skin that spread all over me, i could feel any sense i had left my mind the more he held me. Any ounce of regret completely washing out of me as his fangs danced over my neck right over where he bit me before.

I was ready to give in closing my arms around his neck as he did the same, holding me tightly burying his head deeper in my neck ready to leave another mark on it.

My body burned in anticipation but, all that heat was abruptly cooled down the second i heard the door opened and steps towards us.

As if an instinct I immediately pushed Yoongi away making him fall over the bed and he looked at me almost angrily, i gave him an apoplectic look before turning to the source who interrupted us so suddenly and I immediately felt my body froze at the sight of Jin right there.

- sorry, did I surprise you? - he asked confused.

- ah…yeah a little bit - i mumbled, swallowing nervously.

- well, my apologies if I interrupted your sentimental hug i need to talk with you y/n - he said, now sounding more serious.

- of, course - i turned to Yoongi who now seemed to be even more angry - if you need anything there is a button on the panel beside the door if you push it, it will immediately be directed to the service desk you can call for me or request anything you might need.

- yeah, whatever… - he mumbled not looking at me as he got up, walking past me towards the bathtub.

I just nodded and turned to Jin giving him a small smile as we made our way out of the room, i was thankful once again for Jin if he didn’t show up god knows were i would have end up in that room with him. Shit, he didn’t see anything right?

A sight left my lips once we were out of the room in the long white corridor of the seventh floor, i knew i had to get a hold of my emotions but gosh how difficult did Yoongi had to make things for me. How many times will he put me in such situations? Thankfully we were just holding each other and Jin only took it as a hug, i need to stop this before it gets too much Yoongi clearly told me today he won’t hold himself for much longer. I shouldn’t be alone with him anymore, that way he wont act out and i wont have to fail again to stop him. Clearly he knew how weak i was with him and would only make things more difficult to me.

Jin turned suddenly to me, a serious look over his features. Once the door closed beside us he looked up to my eyes, i never once saw him this serious and it was not very assuring to see him like this. I could tell he was tired, the conversation with his father took so long it must have been a hell for him.

- Jin?

- y/n… - he gave me a small smile.

All about his looks we’re telling me something was off, knowing how long it took for him to come back with an answer from his father about Yoongi and how difficult it has been ever since we stared with his treatment, this could only mean it didn’t work.

I could already feel the burning behind my eyes the more I stared at Jin as he stood in front of me, as if the entire world was coming crashing over me.

- Yoongis case…. - he began, eyes staring down at the floor - his case was passed entirely to me, I’ll be the one in charge of him from now on.

- Jin…

Just like that as my brain begins to understand his words completely, I felt like I could finally breath again.

I couldn’t believe his words, by Yoongi being passed to Jin completely he would be able to take care of him without any questions. I immediately pulled him for a hug, hearing his chuckle on my neck as he hugged me back just as tightly.

- you almost got me! - i said, pulling out to look at his face - how did you get it?

- to be honest with you, he was very reluctant at first but if it wasn’t for… - he paused, looking at both sides of the corridor before leaning closer to whisper - his new addition.

- what do you mean?

- a new snake hybrid was assigned to the clinic - he simply said, eyes shining over mine.

Another snake hybrid? I didn’t know if I should be happy for it being the reason Yoongi was released from Jin’s father or worried, he might end like Yoongi.

- what? - I asked, releasing Jin from my arms - so far it was almost impossible to get them?

Truth be told, snake hybrids were the rarest kind to be found. That was the reason Jin’s father was so set on making him mate just to continue his specie.

Jin leaned on the wall a knowing smirk on his full lips as he looked at me, putting his hands on his pockets before continuing.

- i know, but knowing dad he would do anything to get what he wants and with the positive background of Yoongis treatments done by you he managed to get the permission for it.

- what does it have to do with me? - I asked even more intrigued.

- everything about Yoongis case was reported to my father, he used that to get the female hybrid and now he got another male in case… - he paused before continuing lowly - in case Yoongi doesn’t make it.

I let his words sink in before a long sight left my lips, bitterness rising under my tongue all over again. How dare they assume he wouldn’t make it after treat him so terribly for so long just to make it seem like “he didn’t make it”.

Jin seemed to notice exactly what was running through my head as he quickly turned to me, giving me a smile.

- don’t worry y/n, that won’t happen anymore - Jin assure me, giving my should a light squeeze.

- i know… - I breathe out - I won’t let it happen.

I will do my best so Yoongi never goes through all of that pain again, I’ll continue to treat him until his fully recovered and I’ll be there for him as he mates just like any other hybrid.

He deserves everything of the best. I’ll make sure he gets the treatments he needs in order to be happy.

- is that why you were hugging before? - Jin sudden asked, making me look at him suprised.

- yeah… - I could already fell the heat rising up on my cheeks and quickly looked away from him.

I could only nod as we made our way towards the elevators, no one said anything after that and I could think was things will finally work out for us now.

Like a heavy weight was lifted from my shoulders.

[…]

After our talk me and Jin decided to rushed things a bit, since Yoongis meeting with the female hybrid was in a day. If anything went bed we still had some time to make any adjustments for him, we would be starting over with a few exams today and as the results would be ready only tomorrow Jin would be in charge of Yoongi before the mate meeting.

I couldn’t hold my excitement as we walked out of the office, it was long enough for Yoongi to finally get the rest he needed and to be treated like a patient and not a lab rat.

When’s hybrid is admitted to the clinic, we first check his vitals and take some blood samples for exams and check the levels of their hormones. As well as any symptoms of sickness he might be feeling to proceed with the medication he needs.

In his case I agreed with Jin to get him fully examined, since I didn’t know what kind of tests were done on him we would have to check everything to ensure his condition is good.

After getting the right medical devices me and Jin made our way back to Yoongis room to start his procedures.

I could do all of it alone, but lately Yoongi was making me more nervous than usual. I didn’t wanted to risk anything like before so I made sure Jin would be with me at all times, in case Yoongi might try more of his plays.

Already in front his new room i quickly inserted the code on the digital panel and the door opened, I made my way in as Jin fallowed right behind me. Even though I asked him to come for other reasons, I could tell he was excited about too.

Not many people at the clinic knew this, but Jin cared a lot for the hybrids. He was usually busy but whenever he could he would show up at the clinic and help out, just like now with Yoongi.

I couldn’t mess this up now more then ever, my feelings shouldn’t matter now. Jin is putting every effort he has into saving Yoongi, if anything happens it will only reflect badly on him.

This is a hard to carry on, I let myself fall too deep for Yoongi. But I knew that once he meets the female snake hybrid, I’ll be left out in his memory only. Hybrids crave a mate more then anything else, I was just a side effect in his life. Nothing to worry about, soon he’ll meet with the one who’s meant for him.

I should forget about this feelings now, before getting myself hurt.

- Yoongi? - I asked standing in the middle of the room as I didn’t find him anywhere there.

- where is he? - said Jin beside me

I could already begin to feel the drastic change of emotions boiling up in my chest, worrying something might have happened in the last couple hours.

But before I could even get a single word out of my mind, the snake hybrid emerged from the bathtub.

I never felt more grateful for having Jin right beside me then in that moment, as I watched Yoongi brushing his wet black hair back completely - as I notice from all his clothes on the floor - naked in that bathtub exposing his skin for all eyes to see.

I gulped down, trying my best to stay focused on the task set for myself but, oh, god, how badly I wanted to run my finger through his hair, how baldy I wanted to give in to him.

Let me bite you again.

His words were like poison in my head, completely losing myself again as his dark and glossy eyes stared right at my figure. A chill running dow my spine at the sight of him.

- Hello Yoongi - began Jin beside me and I was grateful once again - are you enjoying your new room?

- humm - he purrs, eyes still not letting go of me - now I’m.

Shit.

- that’s good to hear - Jin said - we’ll be taking a few exams right now if you could please dress yourself?

- oh, more exams - he mumbled, moving forward still in the bathtub he leaned on the edge of it before looking up at me - can you help me y/n?

- what? Oh, yes - I stumbled on my words, still not over how beautiful he looked.

My reaction seemed to amuse him as I hear his deep chuckled behind me once I quickly made my way toward the small cabinet on the right to get him a new pair of clothes and a towel, and here I though he would behave himself if we weren’t alone.

I made my way towards him to hand him the towel, feeling the heat burn my whole face once I was close enough to hand him the towel. He looked up at me for a second not moving an inch to get it, amusement clearly facing over his soft features before he took it from my hand slowly as if on purpose.

I also didn’t move an inch, not caring this time to even look away as he got up covering himself with the towel finally getting out the tub to get dressed.

Now standing in front of me he took the clothes from my hands, leaning closer to my face.

- did you think about my offer? - he whispered, dark eyes drifting down to my lips.

Offer?

Let me bite you again.

I gulped down hard. He was clearly trying to get under my skin now, something felt different about him. Ever since we got here he’s been acting different, I couldn’t wrap my finger around it but something on his voice and even his eyes were not the same.

This time I turned around not to look, making my way back to where Jin stood looking anywhere but at me and Yoongi in that moment.

- ahm… we’ll take a sample of your blood Yoongi - Jin decided to break the ice - if you don’t mind.

- is y/n the one who’ll do it? - Yoongis question brought my attention back to him, he already had dressed his bottom and turned to me and Jin while putting on his shirt.

- of course I will - I reply, Jin gave me a small smile before handing me de syringe from the small silver tray.

I notice how his eyes switched to the syringe in my hand as I approached him, looking attentively at it as I carefully lifted his arm up to take some of his blood.

This kind of procedures are needed to help detect any diseases hidden from the naked eye or any damage caused by the tests done on him over the years, since no other exams were taking to ensure of that we would have to take a new one and blood tests are more accurate in this case.

Pushing the sleeve up his arm to find his vein seeing as they weren’t blue or green but a dark gray, was something I didn’t notice before. I looked up to his eyes before continuing, he had a hard expression on his face dark eyes still focused over the syringe.

- it’s okay… - I softly mumble to him, bringing his attention back to my face - it won’t hurt, you know how is done.

- I do… it’s just… - he sighted.

- I know - I tell him, carefully running my thumb over the single gray vein on his arm - I’ll do it know.

He only nodded looking away from it. This time he moved a bit when I inserted the needle into his vein, his eyes looked at floor clouded at the motion.

Thankfully things like this didn’t took much longer and in a second I was done with it, pressing over the vein with a small cotton making sure no blood drops before sliding his sleeve back down.

- hey… - I bring his attention back to me, holding his hand softly.

He nodded slowly almost leaning towards me but I quickly took a step back, stoping him before anything happens. I gave him a small smile before turning around to give Jin the syringe and the small blood sample.

- just one more now - Jin said - should we go already?

- ah, we…

- yes, please - Yoongi interrupted before I could even ask him - the sooner we do this the sooner it ends.

- right… - Jin replied behind me already making his way toward the door.

I wait for Yoongi before making my way to Jin, taking the collar from the compartment beside the door. Yoongi is quick standing close to me lowering his head down a bit for me to close the metal collar around his neck.

Usually at time like this he would never miss the chance to stare deeply into my souls with his dark and glossy eyes but, now he looked anywhere but me. Blinking a couple of times before nervously hold into my coat, once I’m done with the collar I took his hand from my coat into my own.

He didn’t look at me but seemed to be a bit more calmer this time.

I could only wonder what might have gotten into him, Yoongi wasn’t knew to this kind of procedures so his reactions were unexpected to me.

All I could think about in that moment was make sure he was alright until we are done with the exams, I’m sure once we are alone he’ll talk to me about it.

It didn’t took much longer for us to get at the exam room, the entire way there I could notice how Yoongi only seemed to grow more anxious beside me. Unknowingly holding my hand tighter each time, if I didn’t trust myself I would’ve stop this right away. But the exam was a good thing for him, it might be very helpful in order to make the right adjustments for his health.

I didn’t minded Jin presence this time and kept myself close to Yoongi at all times, I wanted to make sure he knew I was there for him and wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him.

Once we got in the room I notice from our proximity how stiff he became at the sight of the room, stoping in front of him to change his attention from it to me.

- hey, Yoongi - letting go of his hand to hold his chin softly - I’m right here okay?

- okay…. - he murmured looking back at me.

- is alright if your nervous - I assure him.

- is everything alright? - Jin asked.

- yeah, I’ll prepare him for it you can wait in the other room - I tell him.

Jin nods giving us one last looks before leaving for the room right next to us, separated by a glass window.

I turned back to Yoongi who’s attention was back at the bed in the middle of the room, it was a scan exam done by a clinical machine above the bed.

Just like and x-ray but for your whole body.

- come with me okay? - I gently hold both his hands guiding him towards the bed.

As he sat over it i quickly undid the bottoms of his shirt to carefully place the electrodes on his chest, once I made sure his heart beat was shown on the computer beside the bed.

- alright we are almost… - I took one glance at him before everything completely changed right there.

He looked up at me almost out of breath, chest moving up and done quicker then before as a bit of sweat began to form over his forehead. He was in panic, his heart beat racing on the computer.

- Yoongi what happen? - I held his chin softly up brushing some of the sweat from his face.

- I can’t do this… - he swallowed hard - please y/n take me out of here…

He held into my coat harshly pulling me into him, tears forming under his eyes as he looked up at me.

I felt my heart breaking into a million pieces at the sight. All the abuse from Jin’s father right there in his eyes as he desperately held into me.

- I know Yoongi…. - I held his face softly between my hands - I’m right here for you okay, I’m not leaving you alone. We can do this together okay?

- y/n… - he mumbled leaning into my touch.

- I hate seeing you like this…. - I whispered - I promise this will only take one second, I’ll be right here with you please Yoongi? I have to make sure… I have to make sure they didn’t hurt you any deeper then this.

I softly traced his face with my fingers, cleaning the tears from his eyes.

He leaned towards me resting his face over my chest, hands still grabbing my coat as he brushed his hair feeling his breathing slowly began to go back to normal.

I could see Jin’s worried expression through the window on the wall, he knew better then interver in a moment like this. By now everyone knew how sensitive Yoongi could get when he is in defensive mode.

- you feel better now? - whispered to him having him slowly nod over my chest, I leaned back to see his face catching his dark glossy eyes - can we continue now?

- yes… I can do it - he murmured leaning back but still holding into me.

- I’ll be right here for you okay?

- okay.

I gave him an assured nod as he slowly began to lie down the bed, taking deep breathes as he kept his eyes on me the entire time. I held his pinky to make sure he knew I was right there for him before I tune to the glass window on the wall giving Jin a thumbs up.

Jin nodded to me and with a second the machine begging to move above Yoongi, first the light would scan the individual for then scan throughout his body.

The blue laser light of the magnetic resonance begin to scan his body from head to toe, then from down to up his head. With that the scan was done already.

Once the machine stoped Yoongi got up from the bed as quickly as possible and before I could say anything he pulled me in for a hug by the waist, chest moving up and down against mine as he breathes deep.

- see? I told you it was going to be quick - I told him, lifting my hands up to brush over his black hair.

- it’s the last time right? - he asked over my ear.

- it is Yoongi.

He sighted resting his head on my shoulder. The first step towards his new life has just started, knowing he must been through so much this kind of reaction we’re bound to occur.

But from now on Yoongi will be able to heal from all of this and I’ll be right here for him.

To be continued.

Notes: here is is finally! I hope you guys like this chapter and next update will be next week! See you guys soon! I’m sorry if it wasn’t so good the next chapters will be more interesting!! Thank you for reading my works ! 🫶🩷🩷🩷

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