#clinical negligence

[medicalinjury]

In Australia, the publicity surrounding medical negligence cases is influenced by various factors. While some cases receive significant public attention, others remain private or less known. The level of publicity often hinges on factors such as the nature of the case, the parties involved, and the scope of litigation.

[feyburner]

I ??? woke up at 3am with this scene fully written in my mind palace and quickly jotted it down in the Notes app

*

Clark’s shaking his head before he realizes he’s doing it, and feels a twinge of embarrassment at his own bad manners when Bruce stops mid-word to look at him, brows raised.

“No?” he says.

“No,” Clark says, again without thinking, and again with the reflexive urge to apologize. Somewhere his mother is tutting without knowing why. But he doesn’t apologize, because he’s already saying, “No, it can’t—it can’t be that.”

“Okay,” Bruce says slowly. “Can you elaborate?”

He is, honestly, having trouble taking his eyes off the screen. The mockup design of his new suit is there, dark and sleek, ridged like tactical gear. The blue is like the last shade of evening before you can’t call it evening anymore, the color of nine PM in Kansas in July, so exact there’s a strong chance Bruce color-picked it from a photo. The yellow accents are the cool fluorescent yellow-green of lightning bugs. The red is dark as arterial blood. Every aspect of the suit has been updated—the colors deeper, the angles sharper, the S extending to the corners of its frame—but Bruce has done it without changing the fundamentals. It’s immediately recognizable as the Superman suit, just… well, a little cooler, maybe. A little more of the times. Even the tailoring is modernized. The neckline. The shape of the boots. Where the belt hits at the waist. Clark can tell just by looking that Bruce has not only spent a lot of time on this in general, he’s spent a lot of time designing it specifically with Clark in mind, Clark’s needs and preferences and the small discomforts of his current suit, things he might have mentioned offhand after a mission but never with the assumption that Bruce was listening or filing it away. No doubt the next slides of this presentation will detail all the hidden features of the new suit, and they’ll all be incredibly thoughtful if not slightly overkill, and Bruce will pretend his sole motive here was practicality and risk reduction and respond to any thanks with a curt nod.

And Clark wants to thank him. He will. It’s just.

“It can’t be… cool,” he says, inane. Bruce is watching him with that steady look that used to feel clinical, piercing, and now mostly reads as attentive. “It can’t be—like yours. Tactical, military-grade.”

“Lightyears beyond, actually.”

“It has to—Ma said once, a kid should be able to draw it with crayons. You know? I can’t look like a weapon. I have to—I want to look like a friend.”

He can feel himself flushing. It’s rare that he speaks like this, and rarer still that he does so while being stared at intently. Bruce may think of himself as the darkness, but his gaze is a spotlight: unwavering and revealing and more a little sweat-inducing, for one reason or another.

“Sometimes, when I show up, people laugh,” Clark says. “If it’s somewhere out of the way, where they haven’t seen me before. I show up and I look like a festival performer. It’ll be the worst day of their lives, and they’ve got no reason to trust my face, but when they see what I’m wearing—it goes from ‘Who are you?’ to ‘Who is this guy?’ And that’s a good thing.”

“Hard to be afraid of a man dressed in primary colors,” Bruce says, almost to himself.

“Exactly.”

“I see. Thank you,” he says, “for explaining.”

Clark tries not to show how surprised he is to hear that. Judging by the crook of Bruce’s mouth, his success is negligible. “Of course. Sorry I didn’t—I mean, thank you, obviously, for going to such trouble. I didn’t mean to come in here and—I really do appreciate it, I can tell you put a lot of work in—”

Bruce’s eyes cut away. “No. No need. I didn’t ask, before I…. It was only a first draft. If you’re amenable, I’ll incorporate your feedback into the second one.”

“Oh! Yeah. Yes, of course, but you really don’t have to—”

“If you have any further notes, I would like to hear them.”

There’s something determined in the lines of his face. Clark has the sense that this moment is important, that it’s a turning point, even if he’s not sure why. It feels like striking out into a sea of ice, a blank white expanse under which something precious and vital is hidden, has been hidden all along, just waiting for him to find it. To want to.

“Sure,” he says. He looks back at the suit and swallows, and knows Bruce will see the flicker of his throat and take some meaning from it, and wishes he knew what the meaning was. Or maybe Bruce won’t notice or read into it at all. Maybe Clark needs to calm down, in fact. “Um. I don’t want to assume, but does it… do things?”

“It does things,” Bruce confirms, after the barest pause. “Let me show you the next slide.”

[gadsbywicks]

Gadsby Wicks

Gadsby Wicks is the only specialist medical negligence solicitors firm in Essex and East Anglia. Since 1993 we have helped people claim millions in compensation across birth injuries, surgical complications, misdiagnosis and delayed treatment, with 96% of cases settled outside of court.

Address: Priory Place, New London Road, Chelmsford, Essex CM2 0PP, UK Phone: +44 1245 494929 Website: https://www.gadsbywicks.co.uk

[kupwaratimes-fan]

DM Kupwara Seeks FIR Against Private Clinic Over Death of 2 Patients Due to Alleged Medical Negligence

DM Kupwara Seeks FIR Against Private Clinic Over Death of 2 Patients Due to Alleged Medical Negligence Kupwara, Jun 10 : District Magistrate Kupwara has sought an FIR against a private clinic here over alleged medical negligence by the doctors leading to death of two patients. The District Magistrate Kupwara Dr. Doifode Saggar Dattatray in a communique to SSP concerned Yougal Manhas asked the…

[cleolinda]

@ the spinal clinic

Have spent 45 minutes filling out paperwork (they said come an hour early and that was fair). Air conditioning is negligible. Waiting room is full, everyone is twice my age, and someone smells like cigarettes. I look like I’ve run a marathon. We’re not at Threat Level: Muscle Relaxers yet, but I brought them.

Paperwork asked me if I have tried psychotherapy or prayer for pain. Never been asked that before.

Interesting: two older ladies talking about the assassination attempt in very Concerned Grandma tones. “I wonder if Trump’ll reconsider gun control now that someone’s come at HIM.” Did not expect a pro-gun control take in this Chili’s tonight.

[kittyscupcakeandbunny]

CRAZY OVER YOU x MIN YOONGI

[HYBRID AU]

PART FOUR II

The truth untold

Side Characters: Namjoon/doctor, Seokjin/doctor, Taehyung/Hybrid Tiger, Jungkook/Bunny Hybrid, Hoseok/assistant, new character/Snake Hybrid, new character/unknown hybrid.

Warnings: Smut, mentions of blood, sharp objects, rut, beast behavior, yandere yoongi, possessive behavior, angst.

Genre: Fantasy, hybrids au, smut.

SUMMARY》 Yoongi is a black mamba hybrid one of rarest species of hybrids, who’s about to be put down due to his lack of interest in living. But everything changes after the new medical assistance (y/n) takes a liking to him. Meeting after meeting he realise his feelings for her are not the only thing growing.

< Previously Next Chapter >

____________________________________________

In the books they say black mambas have a distinct mating ritual and the males would even fight for the right to mate when a suitable female mate has been found, a common behavior among the snake hybrids we notice was that no matter the species the males would make a nest to Impress the female a sign he was ready to begin the mating ritual with her. Along the years was believed that behavior stared between hybrids since they no longer could fight for the female’s attention, so far nothing told us otherwise.

So far Yoongi has been presenting signs of heat, although I was sure of it it was all down the line once he told he in fact had no heat. Studies had shown that not all snakes hybrids had heat indeed but, it was so unusual to find one who fit in that category we never once thought Yoongi could be like one of those.

That could only mean everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with a put down procedure the entire clinic could get In trouble for negligence of the hybrids care, as bad as it may be it was a good chance for making the higher ups cancel the procedure, that way Yoongi will be able to be treated the right way and live.

I couldn’t help but feel a bit of hope bloom inside me, helping on Yoongis recover as now my biggest priority even though i had grew more than just a few feelings for him through this days we seen each other i must put them aside and focus on the matter at hand. Those are the thoughts on my mind as i push him slightly away, Interrupted by the sound of my cellphone ringing.

- let me take this… - I said stoping the kiss, he looked at me with heavy eyes but didn’t let me go.

Hands still holding tightly my waist as I breathless took my phone from my pocket, clearing my throat as i see Jin’s name on the caller. He must’ve had arrived already.

- yes? - I began taking the call.

- hey yn, i arrived already, just left Yoongis room and I sanded some cleaners to fix everything it should be done by the time you’re over with his bath i think - he said, before pausing a long sight leaves his mouth - I’m sorry about it all, can we talk once you’re done?

I couldn’t stay angry at Jin for much longer, i knew better that his father must’ve had passed the order for Yoongis prescription and keeping in mind how his father the director really didn’t care if he lived or died anymore I shouldn’t have lashed out on Jin either.

- of course Jin, we should discuss some other things too - i tell him, meaning we must do something about this whole situ at hand with Yoongi.

- I’ll wait for you in my office then, see you - he said.

- see you Jin.

I turned off the call staring up at the hybrid in front of me, he had a curious look on his face still racing my back with his fingers. I took in all of him for one last time every little detail on his face feeling his warm body so close to mine before i release myself from his embrace. Walking back to the closet i get him some clean clothes setting them over the table i turned back to the hybrid.

- you should get change now, we’ll head back to your room - i tell him - Jin told me it should be back to normal by now.

- you’re always leaving me for that director - Yoongi mumbled behind me.

- what? - I turned back to him handing him the clothes.

I watched as he folded them into his own hands, never looking at me as he chooses what piece to wear first a pout forming over his lips. Ever since we meet i notice how he seemed to slowly get closer and more comfortable around me, the more i tried not to think about much of how possessive he seemed to become the more clingy he showed himself to be. I knew this wasn’t the right thing to do, by giving in this burning feeling growing inside my chest i could put him in danger a well as my career here at the clinic. I have been irresponsible this entire time but things need to change from now, my own hormones some how have disrupted this behavior on him as he said himself not long ago before we both make the choice to give in. He didn’t have a fault in all of this, after all he’s just a hybrid it is completely normal for them if they are put in such situations but, I shouldn’t have let that happen. As his doctor it is my responsibility to take care of him and I failed miserably at it, relationships with a patient are completely forbidden.

I can’t keep doing this to Yoongi anymore, i must draw the line now before is too late. Soon he will meet someone like him and probably forget about all of this between us anyway, i just need to save him.

A long sight left my lips before i turn back as h dressed himself.

- i need to discuss with Jin about he stimulants - i said, hearing the sound of clothes - that’s all.

- just that? - he said, still mumbling the words.

I could hear the pout on his lips as he said it, a small smile forming on my own lips. For the smallest second i let myself forget about all of my responsibilities, letting that feeling of warmth sink in my chest. Yoongi never wanted me with anyone else but him at the clinic i liked that, to have someone want you so desperately but that was his instincts. It was a normal behavior for them to feel protective of their partner. For them any other male presence meant a risk of losing their partner, acting out was a normal way to express that they cared.

Ever since he opened up about his feelings and my presence seemed to be getting his own hormones disrupted by mine, things were a lot more clear to me. That wasn’t him, just an instinct.

All because i failed miserably to keep my distance.

- why? - i asked him.

- it would mean I have to fight for your attention - he said, this time closer to me.

His words had a lot more meaning to it then i wanted them to, i had no doubt he meant every single one of them. Its common for snake hybrids to fight for their potential partner to mate if they are dared to by another male, Yoongi must’ve had interpreted Jin’s presence as a threat and certainly mistook my presence as a female in heat. It is much uncommon for it to happened, I myself never saw a hybrid mate with a human before it was so unrealistic too, none of my coworkers had said anything about it in all the years I’ve been working here. It really did made me believe that this was all my own fault, a hybrid mating with a human never happened before.

There was never a possibility for such thing to happened, hybrids and humans never showed any signs of attraction for each other before there was no scientifical background done above that.

Why would Yoongi even be able to sense my hormones was still something I can’t understand, it’s such an unusual possibility I can’t bearly begin to make sense of it. I couldn’t help but feel guilt about it, my presence was just like the heat stimulants for him. Nothing good comes from side effects. I can’t keep doing that to him.

- you don’t have to fight for my attention - i tell him.

He took a deep breath before walking back to me closing the distance between us, I immediately took a set back and he eyed me up and down at my sudden reaction.

- you… - he scoffed - you’re really driving me crazy.

- its not my intention, sorry.

My words had more meaning then i intended too, it was too soon but i had to begin drawing the lines between us. Now with JIn so close to his appointments especially, it will be better for him since he will soon be able to meet his potential mate partner and as much as it might bother me to stand behind those lines I shouldn’t have crossed before, i must carry on my duties as his doctor only. There is no space for love or any sort of feelings between us, our worlds are completely different from one another. This was never supposed to happen anyway.

The walk back to his room was quiet, no one dared to say a word and the space between us was thicker the the silence around us. It was almost to much to bare, having him so close yet so far away I didn’t know if he already had somehow caught on my sudden change as we walked through the long white corridors, he never said anything. I knew some time i would have to tell him this wouldn’t happen between us again but, i kept praying he would just run for the other female without saying anything. Even if it hurts, i just thought it would be better for him to carry on without me.

From time to time I would catch him smirking at me, he would look at me up and down as he walked slowly behind me, not being able to control my own heart feeling the heat rising up to my face blushing hot at his stare each time, he made sure to walk close to me the entire time sometimes bumping into me.

For the time being i would jut ignore it, until its the right time to tell him the truth and put that line between us once and for all.

Once we finally reached his floor through the elevators we made our way to his room, as we got closer i notice someone standing in front of the door to his room soon realizing from the looks it was Hoseok who stood there. He looked up at us a worried expression on his face slowly turning into an angry one as his eyes fall over Yoongis figure behind me.

- why is he not in a collar? - Hoseok spat, not giving me a chance o speak first.

- stop it - I warned him, a sight leaving my lips feeling Yoongi getting closer behind me a protective hand closing around my wrist.

- you’ve been walking around with him like this, without a collar? - he said, a baffled chuckle leaving his lips - after all that happened this morning!?

- yes and he didn’t bite anyone - I tell him, bitting my lip angrily - honestly Hoseok I’m tired of you all misinterpret him.

- now you’re defending him?! - he spat, walking closer to me making Yoongi quickly push me back and taking the front standing between me and Hoseok.

Both males stared down at each other, the sight made me feel a mixture of anxiety and guilty. Knowing Yoongi was only acting out of instinct because he misunderstood completely our feelings, this was just another reminder of why i should’ve been drawing the lines between us.

- I don’t have time for this, I need to talk with Jin about this whole situation - I quickly interrupted, getting myself between both of them i took Yoongis arm into my hand.

- I’ll go with you then - Hoseok said, resting over the wall beside the door.

This wasn’t exactly how I wanted to clear things out with Jin about Yoongi, it was personal and I didn’t wanted to have Hoseok knowing anything especially with his sudden attitude now. Seeing as he wouldn’t move anytime soon i only sighted taking Yoongi back to his room, i closed the door behind us once we were inside alone. Taking a quick look around the room seeing as everything was indeed cleaned up and fixed, the bed in the center as usual and neatly done as well as the small table beside and the only closet in the corner.

He would be able to make a new nest now and rest knowing no more meds would have such drastic effect over him again, i saw how he looked around probably already thinking about it as well.

Any signs from earlier events were all cleaned and I could only sight in relief quickly making my way to the closets over the right wall getting a few more covers from it and putting over the bed, feeling the sharp eyes of the snake hybrid over me as i moved around the room once i though it was enough for him i turned back to him who stood close by the bed watching with curious dark eyes.

- i thought you might want this, for a new nest - I tell him.

I don’t know what about this sentence that makes him blush so hard, he looks so adorable like that. I take in a mental picture of this look, soon i won’t be seeing him like that anymore but i shake off any bitter feelings from it. Treasuring this small moment, he mumbles a “thank you” and i begin to make my way out.

- I’ll be back later - I tel him before leaving.

Not looking back as i did so, the door felt heavier then it ever did. After everything that happened I couldn’t hold back the switch i felt once i made the decision, like that line was already drawn between us and he just didn’t know yet.

I took a deep breath after closing it completely, Hoseok presence beside me was a heavy cold bucket of water. I couldn’t blame him for his reaction, everyone seemed to be a little sensitive lately especially since all the events this morning. Safety protocols exist for a reason and as much as i hated to admit, it was wrong of me for taking Yoongi out without a collar on I shouldn’t have risked more even, essa especially when it had not been too long since he was acting that way.

- shall we? - he said, impatiently.

I only nodded letting him lead the way, guilty was weighing over me more then it ever did.

I knew Hoseok wasn’t happy with my decisions lately, he always been a brother to me and deep down he was just worried for me. I wasn’t exactly the smarted when it came to helping the hybrids, no matter how aggressive they would get i would always make sure to get the job done. There was not a single hybrid I treated that was continuously aggressive once i treated them, it is not their fault to act that way, after all, most of the times they are acting out of fear of getting hurt. Most doctors here don’t even try to get close to them when they are in such state, but I didn’t really liked letting the security handle them whenever those things happened. Just like the tiger hybrid was brought here, I made the mistake of using a small dose of tranquilizer and got hurt. Things like that can happen to any one here, that was why I always took charge of them. Deep down i knew i was part of the small portion of people here who truly wasn’t afraid of them.

Things can get ugly at any time, i wanted Hoseok to know that and stop being so angry about it with me because of it. He always seemed to think of me as a weak person, i got hurt and went back to work that’s how it always had been but lately he just seemed to be over reacting every time.

By the time we got in Jin’s office, the tension between us was thick enough to be cut in the middle with a knife as we both sat quietly in front of seokjins desk, the three of us only stared at each other for a couple of minutes after we got here no one even said a word.

Knowing Jin he was probably trying to figure out what had happened in the meantime for us to be in such situation, his eyes going back and forth between us. Hoseok was ready to set everything over the table, from the way he was heavily breathing beside me i could tell he was still angry at me.

- well… - Jin began, cleaning his throat.

- should i start? - i said, feeling the man beside me burn even more.

- please do - Hoseok spat, turning to me with anger over his eyes.

I swallowed hard, I’ve never been under this stare of his. It definitely pained me more then i wished it did. I took a deep breath before I start.

- I understand Yoongis behavior this morning was not one of the bests…. - I said, making Hoseok scoff beside me.

- yes, we talked over the phone about it for a bit - Jin commented.

- and we came to the conclusion that, such dose of heat stimulants could have side effects… - I said - after talking with Yoongi it was clear to me that this dose everyday was making him sick to the point he was so uncomfortable it made him lose control today.

- I understand - Jin said - I already made a few calls and since you commented before he’s been giving signs of heat they called off completely the meds.

At the mention of his heat Yoongis words went through my mind again, his sudden confession for not heaving a heat was something we had to discuss now. It might also be the cause to his side effects from taking the heat stimulants, when hybrids used to be put under the drugs they should give signs of heat as soon as they take the first dose but Yoongi only started to give signs lately under a big dose. All could only tell he wasn’t being affected even the slightest bit positive by the drugs because there was no heat happening to begin with, which could only resolve in a bad side effect.

- he’s not in heat - I stated, finally bringing a surprise reaction from Jin.

- what? - Jin nervously asked, a chuckle leaving his lips as if not believing me.

- i talked to him about it today, he told me he doesn’t go into heat - I explain - from what I can tell, he only mates to reproduce but we should take new exams to make sure.

There is a moment of silence between us three, Jin seems to be deep in thought probably going over everything to make a conclusion out of this. As much as it could help Yoongis situation, him not having heat meant more exams would have to be taking on him which would only trouble the procedures for his mating and we would need the directors approval first. He could state it is not necessary and we wouldn’t be able to do anything and Yoongi would still have to be put under the drugs again, if Jin convince his father we might be able to save him.

The information he gave us would be crucial to stop his put down, even thought it was just a hybrids heat cycle it would meant the director wouldn’t have much choice but proceed with new exams and procedures for Yoongi and depending on his results he wouldn’t have to be put down anymore.

I felt hope growing inside my chest at the thought of it

- I know you’re thinking what I’m thinking Jin - i tell him, immediately capturing his attention. There was a small smile over his lips as he looked over me.

- I’ll talk with the director and get the permission immediately - he said - it’ll take some time and we must take the exams first, by the time he has to meet the female snake we should have it all settle though.

- wait - Hoseok interrupted - so what does all of his weird behaviors come from?

- probably side effects of the drug hes been taking - i said, keeping short Hoseok wasn’t from the same unit as me things like this were unusual for him - hell be clean from it by Monday.

- yes….- Jin sighted - I understand my mistake and it seems y/n has a way with him no one here does so, I trust you to keep taking good care of him.

- as long as she fallows the protocols - Hoseok said.

- what is this about now? - Jin asked.

- I took him to bath and brought him back without a collar - I said honestly.

- y/n…. You’ll give me grey hairs - Jin said holding his temple - please fallow the protocols, i understand but…

- I will, sorry -I tell him - can we talk alone for a moment Jin?

- oh, yes - Jin looks over to me - what is it?

I wait until Hoseok leaves before i tuner my focus back to Jin, the time until were finally alone i kept thinking and rethinking how to even begin with all of this.

- so what is it y/n, you seem a bit worried? - Jin said, getting up from his seat in front of me to take the one were Hoseok sat before.

- It’s just, this whole situation with Yoongi and what he told me about not having a heat - i began - I can’t help but think that, everything we knew about him was wrong and by proceeding with this procedure the entire clinic could get in trouble for negligence of the hybrids care.

- I know, i was thinking about this too - he said - to be honest with you y/n i notice that after reading his old documents, Yoongi has been indeed been mistreated.

His words immediately stole my breath away. This was much more then i thought it was, it made me question more and more if all this time his behavior wasn’t just an act of rebellion on the clinic but rather tiredness and anger from being treated wrongly this whole time. While everyone thought of him as an asshole, he only acted that way because people have been unfair towards him. That made my blood boil.

- It’s been that way since he was brought here - Jin stated, a sight leaving his lips - i only recently found out about it, not much exams were taken of him for his well being but for scientific purposes. They’ve been testing on him for years until he became… well the hybrid we know now.

- Jin… - I helpless said - what are you telling me now?

- You know exactly what I’m saying…. - i could see his eyes shining like never before - trust me, no one hates this more then me right now.

He had tears older his eyes before he quickly got up and walk back to his desk, Jin hated to be seen like that and it took me a few seconds to realize the meaning under his sudden confession.

They don’t intend to save Yoongi no matter what, its all a set up to hide what they have been doing all this years to him.

- i wont give up that easily - i stated to him - tell your father i said that.

- I won’t either y/n - he said, i could see the determination under his features and that encouraged me even more.

- lets get things right with Yoongi first, before his meeting with the female hybrid - i tell him.

- I’ll take care of it immediately y/n, I’m running a few call already things should start soon.

- ok.

I got up from the seat and made my way to leave.

I could bearly begin to digest all the information that Jin just told me, I couldn’t believe such thing was happening right under my nose at the clinic. All of those years he’s been enduring god knows how many testes done to him without his consent, the more I thought about the more i began to think that maybe the guy he bit that time deserved all of it.

His behavior started to make more sense to me, this whole time he was in defensive mode, even with me. Just like the tiger hybrid i treated that day, Yoongi was also been through so much and he never had a chance to stop it.

I couldn’t help but think about his words, “please, tell me you’re not one of them”. At that time it didn’t made much sense to me but now, feeling this heavy weight on my chest the burning sensation under my eyes.

By the time i left Jin’s office i was bitting into my lip to hold my sobs from leaving my mouth, once i was inside the elevator i could bearly hold it back. It just pained me so much to know it, how hurt he must been all of this years all alone. No one knew it and the ones who did knew never said anything, not did they ever tried to help him.

I didn’t know what to do with all of this information, i just knew that now more then ever i wanted to be with him. After all of this time i was the only one Yoongi didn’t felt threatened by and finally i could understand what he meant all this time, before i could clear things out with him i had to pull myself together. There was more to do then i thought, I don’t have time to cry now i had to save him. I never leave any patient behind, I won’t leave him too.

Feeling the anger dripping out my skin I began to hate even the walls of the clinic and everyone here, anger boiling over me at Jin’s father for allowing all of this to happen and then just try to cover it all with all this stupid procedure but still force him to mate just to keep doing those experiments with another hybrid, i doubt they would wait for the hybrid to even grow up before they begin.

When the door of the elevator opened I made my way through the corridor without a single thought in mind, soon stoping in front of the door i put on the code to get in.

My body is hit by the hot temperature wave of his room already used to it by know, my hands are shaking by my sides once I see him already in his bed. I could tell from the looks over the messy bed he had already done a nest on it, sitting down over the mess of covers he looks up to me as i make my way towards him not wasting a second. He had a smile over his soft features but, quickly turning into a confused expression once he took in how i looked.

I don’t blame him, my face probably looked much puffier now since I’ve been crying on the elevators till i got here. I felt sick of it all, just for that moment i wanted to be just us not a doctor and a patient. Not a hybrid and a human. Just us.

Without thinking twice i took his hand in mine pulling him up as i close my arms around his neck, bitting into my lower lip to hold more tears from falling as i take in his smell.

How could they do this to him?

- what happened y/n? - he softly asked into my neck, arms closing around me just as strong as i held into him.

- I’m not one of them - i mumbled - I’m not like them…

As the words spilled from my mouth i held him tighter on my arms, noticing how his whole body went stiff realizing i knew everything. He tried to lean back but i only held him tighter, i couldn’t look into his face now i would only brake into tears if i did so, not being able to see anything but all the things they might have done to him.

He didn’t push me away after that, we kept ourselves like that for a while until he moved slightly away but I didn’t look into his face yet keeping my eyes over his exposed collar bones.

- you know…. - he began - y/n, please don’t cry I’m fine now.

- no… don’t say that - I murmured - Yoongi they’ll…

I stoped immediately from continuing, I didn’t know if now was the best moment to tell him the truth for all of this. I could bearly even say it out loud what would happen to him.

- what did they to you?

My voice was bearly a whisper, i couldn’t take that thought out of my mind. Why would they do such thing to him?

For another moment we didn’t spoke any words, he held me against him as he began to walk backwards till he reached to bed pulling myself with him as he sat down over it keeping me on his lap as his hands traced my back.

- it doesn’t matter what they did to me y/n…. - he whispered, hand holding my chin up to meet his face - i have you now, its more then I could ever ask for.

- dont say that… I’m not what you need - i tell him.

- but i want you - he said, his words sanding a chill down my spine - you should know that.

I wanted to tell him he was wrong, the was just the hormones speaking. That he needed was in fact the female hybrid and not me, a mare human. Another reason for us to not be together like this anymore, but just for today i allowed myself to be selfish again for just one more time I’ll stay in his arms.

[…]

Things didn’t got much brighter after that. I wished they did but it wasn’t that easy, Jin has been in a meeting with his father over the phone the entire morning to discuss about Yoongis future. He only told me he would be busy with that before the meeting started to inform me that he wouldn’t be able to participate in todays procedures with Yoongi, things were not exactly easy since his father was the one behind everything. Much later i found out Jin left the clinic to talk personally with his father, i began to worry even more about it.

I tried not to let show as i continued to work, when i left Yoongis room after barging in crying i had set in my mind that i would do everything to save him. If i have to give up on us to save him, i will. If someone mistreat him again I’ll put them on their place immediately, this is supposed to be a clinic to save and help hybrids recover not some crazy lab to experiment on those pure beings. They have been through enough already.

Since Namjoon was in charge of the treatment of the female hybrid i was the one in charge of checking their new room were they would be able to meet for the first time and began the mating process, as every hybrid have their own unique traits a separate space is created to accommodate their needs during matings to ensure a safe environment for both as they go through an important transition with their partner.

We had a few hybrids already in mating process, rehabilitation sometimes take longer for them and we cannot put them immediately into mating process as that can also make it harder for them to chose a partner. Our first priority is their safety and well being no matter what.

With Yoongis case I didn’t felt any different in that matter and the fact that this entire procedure to make him mate in the hopes that the clinic can keep his specie alive made me sick, if he was sick it would been a complete different scenario but since his healthy and the only side effect is his skin condition it doesn’t sit right with me to carry on this assignment, knowing the entire truth about the director and the things the clinic made him go through all this years kept making my stomach turn back and forth. I felt more inclined to save him even more now, no matter what.

The seventh floor was were the mating rooms were at, once i got there I quickly made my way towards the room assigned for Yoongi. The identification for it was YK10391Q, looking over the identifications on each door as i walked down the long white corridor it was separated by alphabetical order and his was on the few last ones. Every room had a separate entrance to a small room beside theirs were we usually stay to make sure the hybrids are well while they mate, everything is monitored by a medical team and the hybrids doctor on the first days before they began mating in case any problems occur. Anything can happen while they are alone there, in the past cases a few hybrids got a bit overwhelmed and ended up hurting their mate pretty badly and had to be quickly separated. They are given the privacy needed for their mating process but we always ensure everything is safe for them to enjoy such precious moment together. Nobody watches them but if something happens we must be there to assist them.

Yoongis room wasn’t much different from his right now, the temperature was high enough to make them comfortable and the lights were not as bright since their vision is very sensitive. There was a round bed in a corner covered with white heavy covers, on the other side close to it was a small bath tub still being installed.

- miss. Yn - said a male voice behind me.

I quickly turned noticing a man with a few papers in hand entering the room, he wore a yellow cap and by his uniform he must the one in charge of the design of the the room.

- hello sir.

- are you here to check the room of the patient doctor? - he asked.

- yes, are you the one in charge?

- I’m doctor, is everything to your liking? - he said while making his way towards the bathtub.

I took another glance around.

- the temperature is good as well as the lights here but, it’ll need more covers on the bed for a nest and could change the sheets for some silk, he has very sensitive skin it could be a little irritating for him - i said watching the man take a few notes.

- that wont be a problem miss, something else?

- ah yes, this bathtub how is going to be?

- just simple with a system for hot water and there will be put a small water fall in that corner as well as some lavender plants around, doctor Namjoon requested for the female since it helps her calm down.

- that’s good then - i tell him - for now that’s all i have in mind, when will it be done?

- it should be all done by today.

- okay, thank you.

With that i left the room.

We would be able to move Yoongi to the mating room today then, that was good since his mating would began on Monday. With him being able to be in his new room before anything we could still rearrange anything he might need.

Checking the clock on the elevator as i made my way to the first floor, seeing as i still had time before Yoongis lunch so i made the decision to check my patients before. Some normal and non eventful duties to clear my mind now is what i needed to get back in track.

I decided to check back on the tiger hybrid from yesterday, it hasn’t been a long time since i saw him so i should check his exams before making anymore procedures with him.

I took his files from the exam room noticing a few people were there a the moment, I complimented them before taking the files i needed and leaving for the hybrids room.

[…]

Yoongi - POV

I could still smell her scent on my clothes, ever since she left to continue her duties at the clinic after telling me she now knew everything. Part of me wished she didn’t know that, another small part of me was happy someone finally knew what they did to me and the fact that it was her brought some comfort to me but at the same time I couldn’t help but wonder if behind all of that she just pitted me.

No one has ever been this kind and understanding of me my whole existence, i was put on testes ever since I learned how to walk. They would take pieces of my skin, draw blood of me all the damn time. Not to mention the pain every time they tied me up in that bed to use chemicals on me, trying to test my scale’s capabilities of endurance, regeneration and so on. It became so much i could bearly eat anymore, it hasn’t been much long since they had finally stoped those tests.

Things felt different ever since these two new doctors began treating me, i never had a female doctor before. Never new why. She was the first one to treat me and I couldn’t help but feel embraced by her presence every time she comes in.

I had always hated the males in this clinic, they never showed me kindness even when i was a child. I wondered if all this time I wasn’t assigned a famele doctor on purpose, just to be mistreated by those men on purpose.

For all those years i had been in survival mode, leaning to adapt to stay alive but things seemed to have changed since yn came here. These two were not treating me for no reason, after being left alone to rot in here for so long their sudden appearance was not goin g unnoticed by me. I knew that she was hidden something from me, but Yn wasn’t like the other she would tell me when the time is right. I know she will.

Looking up at the dark ceiling of my room feeling the warm temperature surrounding me softly, touching my body through the silk. My skin felt so much better now with yn baths, for a long time i had simply given up on my shadding but I couldn’t do that anymore.

I had to look good for her, it was a given how fast i could heal my body. No one knew about that, even after all the tests they had put me under i still manage to hide everything about me from them. There was still a few things i had to hide from yn as well, i dont know how much longer i can keep this up though.

No wonder all those males doctors are always surrounding her all the damn time, her scent seemed to be all over the room even after she left. It continued to drive me completely insane, I wondered for how much longer will i have to keep this up with all the mating process she wants me to go through before i can finally take her.

I have a feeling those males she calls friends are trying to test my patience, not only do i have to worry about them but her other patients. That bunny was really asking to be eaten alive when he scented her, the more I thought about such thing happening the more anger boiled over me.

Did she liked that? How was he touching her? Is that the kind of hybrid she likes?

How dare her test me like this, i could feel my entire body vibrates with rage again. But quickly brushed off the best i could. I was lucky about the heat stimulants the first time, if i lash out again today i dont know how ill be able to get myself out of it again.

I hated to lie to her but, since she was also hiding things from me it was only fair.

Spreading myself over the soft surface of my new nest i let the warm temperature embrace by body comforting me into a deep thought.

- y/n…

Her name left my lips like honey, i could stil taste her from this morning.

It didn’t seem to be the right choice to mate with her but, after spending time with her and being around her I didn’t care if it wasn’t right anymore whenever I was with her every cell in my body called for her. After tasting her I knew she was ready for me, her scent was dripping from every inch on her skin a silent call for me to be with her only I could sense it.

She’s been considerate enough to get more covers four nest, I couldn’t believe when she did that. No one has ever asked for me to make a nest before, y/n was the one I wanted my mind wouldn’t change about that.

I needed her so desperately, I can’t take anymore crumbs from her. I need to feel her skin completely, every centimeter of her same beautiful body against mine. Her soft breaths as she can bearly hold heel self form the pleasure.

Spreading my arms above my head as the image of her beautiful face filled my mind, the ghost of her fingers around my neck were enough to make me go insane.

Even the silk covering my skin was unbearable in that moment, a feeling of numbness in my mind as her scent kept filling my lunges. I bite into my bottom lip tasting my own poison as I harshly ripped open my shirt, not being able to even control my movements any longer. Lifting it up to my nose to feel her scent better, it was so sweet i wanted to cry.

Hips moving up and down the more i thought about her body against mine this morning, how breathless she was under my touch, how delicate her skin feels.

I let that thought drive me completely out of my sanity in that dark room again.

[…]

Y/n - POV

By the time I was done checking on Jungkook the bunny hybrid again, i was restlessly making my way to the kitchen to get Yoongis meal. Jin didn’t call me but sanded a massage instead telling me to carry on the assignments without him. Nothing else, no words were needed anyway. I knew he was still talking with his father trying his best to convince him about Yoongi, i sighted watchim his food being prepared this was taking much longer then I thought it would. I just hope he gets in his father head to make the right decision for Yoongi, after all those years he deserves to be treated the right way.

I thanked the lady after she hands me the silver tray with Yoongis food, quickly making my way to his floor. I notice this time the food wasn’t just fruits but some nicely cut kimbab, the fact that they starved him all this years was a pinch to my heart. But now things will slowly start to go back to their right way, usually all the hybrids eat together at the cafeteria with a few exceptions for especial cases as we always ensure their safety and let them socialize with each other which is just as important for them. You can’t just lock them up in their rooms till they are fully recovered.

As i watched the numbers on the elevator go up i felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and carefully reach for it with one hand, seeing a massage from one of my colleagues informing that Yoongis mating room was all set. A sight of relief left my lips, thankfully I’ll be able to set Yoongi on his room before Monday. Since tomorrow is my rest day i won’t be working and will only be at the clinic Monday, the fact that I’ll be able to take him to his room brought some comfort to my mind. I didn’t wanted anything to happen while I wasn’t here and knowing Yoongi didn’t felt comfortable around the other doctor was not a thought that brought a pleasant feeling at all. Especially now that I know more about what happened to him, i felt even more protective of him. Not knowing if they would care for him nicely or continue to mistreat him.

Once the door of the elevator opened at his floor I quickly made my way through the long corridor toward his room, i had so much going on in my mind I didn’t know where to start with it. I knew i wanted to do but if Jin’s father don’t agree with us i could lose Yoongi forever, that thought was not the most pleasant to bear. I didn’t know what i was capable of doing if that ever happen, it didn’t help my nerves how Jin hasn’t returned any of my calls or massages.

For now i must carry on with Yoongis appointment as if nothing happened, until i can tell him the truth. He’s aware of the fact that i know what happened to him at the clinic, trying to carry on now as if I didn’t know or nothing happen was not what i wanted too.

With a long sight i opened the door to his room, ready to continue with this till the end whatever it might take to save him.

As the door closed behind me i waited until all the lights of the room were back on, felling the hot temperature of the room immediately embrace my entire body cold from the air outside. Walking closer to his bed were seeing as he was laying down upon noticing my presence he slowly lifted his upper body up.

Dark eyes staring into mine tiredly, almost immediately making my heart skip a beat.

I stared at him confused seeing his shirt ripped open on his body, exposing his chest completely as he just looked up at me with dark glossy eyes. I never saw such look on his face before, his eyes never looked so dark that his entire pupil was almost covering his entire eye, his chest moved up and down fast, sweat dripping down from his neck the ends of his hair wet from it.

I carefully placed the tray on the table over the side before quickly making my way towards the small cabinet on the right. Taking a new shirt and a towel with me stoping beside him, he slowly sits up completely as i begin to dry some of the sweat on his neck.

- did something happened, you look… bad? - i ask him carefully, worry filling every muscle in my body.

- I’m fine… - he mumbles, taking the towel from my hands to dry his face.

- are you sure?

- yes, y/n - he said, turning towards me as he takes of the shirt to replace for the new one i had in my hands - its just hot… can i have some water?

- oh, of course - I quickly got up to take the cup with water on his tray, turning around back to give him it.

He drank the water in big gulps, chest moving up and down faster as he finish it holding the glass over his knee as he looked down. I notice his eyes were slowly going back, still dark like a night sky but not like before. I sit back beside him, taking the glass from his hand to put it on the floor as I watched his motions. He looked exhausted as if he had run a marathon, i wondered what might have happened while i was gone.

I didn’t like to see him like this, i knew it was time for me to began setting boundaries and lines between us but, when i saw him like that i couldn’t help how i felt.

- hey… Yoongi - I carefully brushed a strand of hair out his face, gasping as he suddenly leaned down over my shoulder resting his face on my neck.

- you smell so good today… - he groaned over my skin, one arm closing above my legs as he leaned more against me.

I immediately went under panicking, there was a moment to draw a line. Set some boundaries Y/n.

- i brought you some food - I quickly changed the topic, taking his arm from around my waist as i got up.

Cleaning my throat while i take the tray with food with me, sitting back beside him this time i put the tray between us to create some space. I noticed how he looked at it for a moment then back up at me.

- you can’t eat only fruits for the rest of your life - i tell him - so, to start small and simple some kimbab. It’s really good and healthy, its made with vegetables and some tuna rolled up on rice. Here try some, eat slowly so you dont get an upset stomach.

I held one roll up for him to take it, he carefully holds before his nose smelling it before he takes a small bit of it a few pieces falling over his chest in the process.

- oh, no… - I chuckled slightly at his face once he realizes the mess he made - you’re like a kid eating.

Out of habit i took a napkin quickly cleaning the new shirt i gave him from the sauce it dripping on it, leaning closer to him as i cleaned his chin. He watched me quietly, not moving an inch until i lean back clearing my throat.

- so do you like it? - i ask him, swallowing the nervousness back inside.

He just takes another roll and put the entire thing on his mouth, looking at the food between us. Redness rising over his checks as i looked at him astonished.

He never looked so nervous before, what it is happening right now?

Confused i filled another cup with water for him handing it towards him as he took it sill not looking my way, he swallowed the food before taking a big gulp of water.

- sorry… - he said, looking up at me - I’m just… feeling bit hungry now.

- oh - the sound came out of my lips more surprised then I intended to - well eat more then but, slowly this time.

He just nodded before taking another roll and biting into it. For a long moment he just eat slowly and quietly, our eyes would meet from time to time whenever he wanted more water.

- you’re not… - he said after some time - you won’t ask about what happened earlier?

- well, i know enough… to be honest Yoongi, i dont want to make you go through all of that again just to tell me.

He nodded. I took the tray from the bed putting it over the table, we still had som time before i have to go home.

- right, your knew room is ready - i tell him, turning back to him noticing he sat in a more comfortable way resting on his arms.

- knew room?

- all hybrids are put in a special room for the mating process - I explained.

- oh, right… that thing - his face seemed to darkened as he realized what i was talking about.

- we still have some time so i would like to take you there today - i tell him.

- does it have to be today?

- yes, I’m not… i dont work at the clinic tomorrow.

- you dont?

- no Sunday is my rest day, I wasn’t even supposed to be working this afternoon.

- oh, sorry for making you work more.

- this is nothing, - i tell him - besides i like being with you.

- you do?

I nodded giving him a small smile. He gave me another smile in return, looking more relaxed now.

After everything that happened this morning I knew better then to overstep the protocols again with Yoongi, since he didn’t have a good history I assumed he was put on Red code for his attacks although I knew he didn’t meant to hurt anyone he would still have to be put on a collar before going out. On a small compartment beside the hybrids door its their collar for when is needed, all red coded hybrids had it, quickly making my way there typing the code to open the compartment i took the small metal collar. Turning back to him as he slowly walked to me.

- lets go see your new room?

- i dont have much of a choice do i? - he mumbles once he stood in front of me.

His mention brought a sense of discomfort to me, he didn’t have any. And i hated that more then he could imagine.

- sorry…

I looked up at him, his sudden apology bringing my attention back to him as i closed the collar around his neck.

- dont be, you’re right…. - i sighted - i won’t let them hurt you anymore Yoongi. Know that.

I wanted to make sure he knew that. After all I was here to save him, the reason why I chose to be a hybrids doctor was to help this new specie that fell misunderstood by so many when it wasn’t even their fault.

Knowing Yoongis past made me feel uneasy, not for him but now I felt even more pressure to make sure he’s well. Just the thought of being like one of those people from his past that mistreated him so badly made me sick to my stomach.

In just a few days Yoongi managed to completely steal my heart for him, ever since I meet him I’ve been trying my best to ignore those feelings growing inside of my chest. But the closer we got to each other the more I couldn’t let go of him, today wasn’t any different.

- let’s go see your room then - I breathed out.

He gave me a small smile before I opened the door for us to leave. I didn’t felt comfortable having to put him in a collar again, everything just felt so unfair ever since Jin told me about his past in the clinic. I felt like I should be even more careful with him now.

My entire career was dedicated to help hybrids who have been mistreated and unwell, I knew that even though he seemed fine on the outside he must’ve not feel the same on the inside.

He walked close to me as we made our way down the hall towards the elevators, no one said a words as we walked letting the comfortable silence fill the air around us. I notice how we were the only ones on this floor for that moment, but weekends are usual like this and if no special call are made for rescued hybrids the whole day goes by calmly.

I was grateful for days like this at work, it meant the hybrids were well and that was all I wanted for them.

It didn’t took much longer for the doors to the elevators to opened to the seventh floor, I walked out being fallowed by Yoongi who grabbed the back of my coat as we made our way through the long corridor till his own room.

I swallowed nervously, every hour that went through was a clear reminder that my time with him was going to end. I know I needed to set the line between us and stop this before it gets out of hand, it was hard enough already and Yoongi didn’t make it any easier to me.

Now that all was left was a day before he meets the female snake hybrid, I felt even more uneasy knowing he will soon be with someone who’s just like him and can fulfill his needs better.

There is reason why hybrids and humans didn’t work out together and why there has never been a single case like this happening, hybrids can only mate with other hybrids even though they are half humans. We can’t sustain a connection with their hormones to reproduce, for that reason, they don’t feel attracted to us at all.

I couldn’t understand how Yoongi could tell I was ovulating or how that seemed to wake something on him but, it happened. I could already feel the heat growing on my checks the more I thought about. Was I so hot and bother by his male presence that I lost a bit of control?

Shaking this thoughts away as we finally stopped in front of the door to his new room, i quickly typed his code on the digital panel on the wall. Making my way inside the room as the door opened for us, the room now had the same light effect from his old one.

I closed the door behind us as the lights slowly began to turn up above us, it would stay turned off like he was used to but slightly shining on a more warm low tone to make the room more cozy for them.

I watched as he slowly began to walk around the room inspecting every corner of it, he first walked towards the bathtub on the right corner occupying almost the entire wall as a small water fall with lavender flowers and some blue ivy’s surrounded them, a bit of steam flowing up from the water as it continued to fill up indicating it was warm.

He then made his way towards the bed on the other side, checking the extra covers on it with his fingers.

This room wasn’t as big as his other one, but it was made sure that the bed was spacious enough for them as well as the bathtub I see now. I knew for a fact he would love that for sure.

- what do you think? - I ask him, making my way towards him - is there anything you don’t like? We can change it up for you.

- it’s… nice - he murmured, turned back to me.

- that’s good to hear - I tell him - if you feel like you might need something more, just tell me and I’ll get it ready for you.

- can I get you here? - he took another step in my way closing the distance between us.

- that’s not… I mean-

- you said anything? - he interrupted, turning his head slightly to the side furring his eyebrows as he stared at me with those dark orbs.

- I meant for the room, the… you know - I couldn’t form a single straight word as I kept looking into his eyes, heat washing up on my checks the more hi stared and a smirk lift his lips up.

He chuckled leaning towards me, making me immediately hold my breath. His eyes locked with mine as he held my chin between his fingers, thumb slightly brushing over my bottom lip.

I was once again completely under his spell, it was almost unfair how easily he could have me wrap around his finger with only a few touches and sweet nothings. For a hybrid he sure knew how to lure humans into him, but to say he was not attractive would be a lie.

Yoongi was without a doubt the most beautiful being I’ve ever seen in my life, it didn’t took a genius to see his beauty was something completely different then anything in this world, he looked dreamy in every way. Like the ocean beautiful and filled with mysteries.

Almost human looking if not for his beautiful scales over his neck that shined a mix of white and lilac like a pearl. Almost unnoticeable at how softly they were on his body, shining so beautifully under the lights making him look even more unreal. Some would think a black mamba snake hybrid shouldn’t look like this, Yoongi sure was one of the rarest specie we had in our clinic. Black mambas aren’t truly colored black as many would think, the animal name comes from the black colored inside of their mouths and eyes and their body is of a grayish color. You could tell the similarities on him from his eyes, black like the night sky and the soft gray of his scales that only shined a upon light. Yoongi had no warm tone on his body, were his skin wasn’t covered in grayish scales he was so pale some would think he was sick but that was just another thing that made him even more special.

I stoped him from leaning in more with my hand over his chest feeling how his breathing has quickened as it moved up and down under my hand, swallowing nervously as i looked up into his eyes. His expression didn’t change a bit at my movements, he licked his bottom lip before turning his head slightly to the other side bring his hand up to cover mine on his chest pushing down against him and stoping over his hip.

- let me bite you again - he said in a whisper immediately stealing my breath away.

- what?

- please… i don’t think i can do this anymore y/n - he murmured, as if he was in pain.

Before i could say anything he pulled me against his body complete with his other arm, circling around my waist burying his face on my neck a gasp leaves my lips as i feel his hand sliding up my back under my coat stoping at the back of my neck.

My own hands holding him by the arms trying to put some distance between us but failing completely, i tried again at the feeling of his fangs over the skin of my neck brushing over it every so slightly.

- please… i wont hurt you i promise - he whispered above my ear lips brushing against it.

- i don’t… i - no words would come out of my mind to make any sense of this.

The more I felt his hands all over me again, the more my body seemed to gave in his words. Every inch of skin he traced with his fingers left a path of heat on my skin that spread all over me, i could feel any sense i had left my mind the more he held me. Any ounce of regret completely washing out of me as his fangs danced over my neck right over where he bit me before.

I was ready to give in closing my arms around his neck as he did the same, holding me tightly burying his head deeper in my neck ready to leave another mark on it.

My body burned in anticipation but, all that heat was abruptly cooled down the second i heard the door opened and steps towards us.

As if an instinct I immediately pushed Yoongi away making him fall over the bed and he looked at me almost angrily, i gave him an apoplectic look before turning to the source who interrupted us so suddenly and I immediately felt my body froze at the sight of Jin right there.

- sorry, did I surprise you? - he asked confused.

- ah…yeah a little bit - i mumbled, swallowing nervously.

- well, my apologies if I interrupted your sentimental hug i need to talk with you y/n - he said, now sounding more serious.

- of, course - i turned to Yoongi who now seemed to be even more angry - if you need anything there is a button on the panel beside the door if you push it, it will immediately be directed to the service desk you can call for me or request anything you might need.

- yeah, whatever… - he mumbled not looking at me as he got up, walking past me towards the bathtub.

I just nodded and turned to Jin giving him a small smile as we made our way out of the room, i was thankful once again for Jin if he didn’t show up god knows were i would have end up in that room with him. Shit, he didn’t see anything right?

A sight left my lips once we were out of the room in the long white corridor of the seventh floor, i knew i had to get a hold of my emotions but gosh how difficult did Yoongi had to make things for me. How many times will he put me in such situations? Thankfully we were just holding each other and Jin only took it as a hug, i need to stop this before it gets too much Yoongi clearly told me today he won’t hold himself for much longer. I shouldn’t be alone with him anymore, that way he wont act out and i wont have to fail again to stop him. Clearly he knew how weak i was with him and would only make things more difficult to me.

Jin turned suddenly to me, a serious look over his features. Once the door closed beside us he looked up to my eyes, i never once saw him this serious and it was not very assuring to see him like this. I could tell he was tired, the conversation with his father took so long it must have been a hell for him.

- Jin?

- y/n… - he gave me a small smile.

All about his looks we’re telling me something was off, knowing how long it took for him to come back with an answer from his father about Yoongi and how difficult it has been ever since we stared with his treatment, this could only mean it didn’t work.

I could already feel the burning behind my eyes the more I stared at Jin as he stood in front of me, as if the entire world was coming crashing over me.

- Yoongis case…. - he began, eyes staring down at the floor - his case was passed entirely to me, I’ll be the one in charge of him from now on.

- Jin…

Just like that as my brain begins to understand his words completely, I felt like I could finally breath again.

I couldn’t believe his words, by Yoongi being passed to Jin completely he would be able to take care of him without any questions. I immediately pulled him for a hug, hearing his chuckle on my neck as he hugged me back just as tightly.

- you almost got me! - i said, pulling out to look at his face - how did you get it?

- to be honest with you, he was very reluctant at first but if it wasn’t for… - he paused, looking at both sides of the corridor before leaning closer to whisper - his new addition.

- what do you mean?

- a new snake hybrid was assigned to the clinic - he simply said, eyes shining over mine.

Another snake hybrid? I didn’t know if I should be happy for it being the reason Yoongi was released from Jin’s father or worried, he might end like Yoongi.

- what? - I asked, releasing Jin from my arms - so far it was almost impossible to get them?

Truth be told, snake hybrids were the rarest kind to be found. That was the reason Jin’s father was so set on making him mate just to continue his specie.

Jin leaned on the wall a knowing smirk on his full lips as he looked at me, putting his hands on his pockets before continuing.

- i know, but knowing dad he would do anything to get what he wants and with the positive background of Yoongis treatments done by you he managed to get the permission for it.

- what does it have to do with me? - I asked even more intrigued.

- everything about Yoongis case was reported to my father, he used that to get the female hybrid and now he got another male in case… - he paused before continuing lowly - in case Yoongi doesn’t make it.

I let his words sink in before a long sight left my lips, bitterness rising under my tongue all over again. How dare they assume he wouldn’t make it after treat him so terribly for so long just to make it seem like “he didn’t make it”.

Jin seemed to notice exactly what was running through my head as he quickly turned to me, giving me a smile.

- don’t worry y/n, that won’t happen anymore - Jin assure me, giving my should a light squeeze.

- i know… - I breathe out - I won’t let it happen.

I will do my best so Yoongi never goes through all of that pain again, I’ll continue to treat him until his fully recovered and I’ll be there for him as he mates just like any other hybrid.

He deserves everything of the best. I’ll make sure he gets the treatments he needs in order to be happy.

- is that why you were hugging before? - Jin sudden asked, making me look at him suprised.

- yeah… - I could already fell the heat rising up on my cheeks and quickly looked away from him.

I could only nod as we made our way towards the elevators, no one said anything after that and I could think was things will finally work out for us now.

Like a heavy weight was lifted from my shoulders.

[…]

After our talk me and Jin decided to rushed things a bit, since Yoongis meeting with the female hybrid was in a day. If anything went bed we still had some time to make any adjustments for him, we would be starting over with a few exams today and as the results would be ready only tomorrow Jin would be in charge of Yoongi before the mate meeting.

I couldn’t hold my excitement as we walked out of the office, it was long enough for Yoongi to finally get the rest he needed and to be treated like a patient and not a lab rat.

When’s hybrid is admitted to the clinic, we first check his vitals and take some blood samples for exams and check the levels of their hormones. As well as any symptoms of sickness he might be feeling to proceed with the medication he needs.

In his case I agreed with Jin to get him fully examined, since I didn’t know what kind of tests were done on him we would have to check everything to ensure his condition is good.

After getting the right medical devices me and Jin made our way back to Yoongis room to start his procedures.

I could do all of it alone, but lately Yoongi was making me more nervous than usual. I didn’t wanted to risk anything like before so I made sure Jin would be with me at all times, in case Yoongi might try more of his plays.

Already in front his new room i quickly inserted the code on the digital panel and the door opened, I made my way in as Jin fallowed right behind me. Even though I asked him to come for other reasons, I could tell he was excited about too.

Not many people at the clinic knew this, but Jin cared a lot for the hybrids. He was usually busy but whenever he could he would show up at the clinic and help out, just like now with Yoongi.

I couldn’t mess this up now more then ever, my feelings shouldn’t matter now. Jin is putting every effort he has into saving Yoongi, if anything happens it will only reflect badly on him.

This is a hard to carry on, I let myself fall too deep for Yoongi. But I knew that once he meets the female snake hybrid, I’ll be left out in his memory only. Hybrids crave a mate more then anything else, I was just a side effect in his life. Nothing to worry about, soon he’ll meet with the one who’s meant for him.

I should forget about this feelings now, before getting myself hurt.

- Yoongi? - I asked standing in the middle of the room as I didn’t find him anywhere there.

- where is he? - said Jin beside me

I could already begin to feel the drastic change of emotions boiling up in my chest, worrying something might have happened in the last couple hours.

But before I could even get a single word out of my mind, the snake hybrid emerged from the bathtub.

I never felt more grateful for having Jin right beside me then in that moment, as I watched Yoongi brushing his wet black hair back completely - as I notice from all his clothes on the floor - naked in that bathtub exposing his skin for all eyes to see.

I gulped down, trying my best to stay focused on the task set for myself but, oh, god, how badly I wanted to run my finger through his hair, how baldy I wanted to give in to him.

Let me bite you again.

His words were like poison in my head, completely losing myself again as his dark and glossy eyes stared right at my figure. A chill running dow my spine at the sight of him.

- Hello Yoongi - began Jin beside me and I was grateful once again - are you enjoying your new room?

- humm - he purrs, eyes still not letting go of me - now I’m.

Shit.

- that’s good to hear - Jin said - we’ll be taking a few exams right now if you could please dress yourself?

- oh, more exams - he mumbled, moving forward still in the bathtub he leaned on the edge of it before looking up at me - can you help me y/n?

- what? Oh, yes - I stumbled on my words, still not over how beautiful he looked.

My reaction seemed to amuse him as I hear his deep chuckled behind me once I quickly made my way toward the small cabinet on the right to get him a new pair of clothes and a towel, and here I though he would behave himself if we weren’t alone.

I made my way towards him to hand him the towel, feeling the heat burn my whole face once I was close enough to hand him the towel. He looked up at me for a second not moving an inch to get it, amusement clearly facing over his soft features before he took it from my hand slowly as if on purpose.

I also didn’t move an inch, not caring this time to even look away as he got up covering himself with the towel finally getting out the tub to get dressed.

Now standing in front of me he took the clothes from my hands, leaning closer to my face.

- did you think about my offer? - he whispered, dark eyes drifting down to my lips.

Offer?

Let me bite you again.

I gulped down hard. He was clearly trying to get under my skin now, something felt different about him. Ever since we got here he’s been acting different, I couldn’t wrap my finger around it but something on his voice and even his eyes were not the same.

This time I turned around not to look, making my way back to where Jin stood looking anywhere but at me and Yoongi in that moment.

- ahm… we’ll take a sample of your blood Yoongi - Jin decided to break the ice - if you don’t mind.

- is y/n the one who’ll do it? - Yoongis question brought my attention back to him, he already had dressed his bottom and turned to me and Jin while putting on his shirt.

- of course I will - I reply, Jin gave me a small smile before handing me de syringe from the small silver tray.

I notice how his eyes switched to the syringe in my hand as I approached him, looking attentively at it as I carefully lifted his arm up to take some of his blood.

This kind of procedures are needed to help detect any diseases hidden from the naked eye or any damage caused by the tests done on him over the years, since no other exams were taking to ensure of that we would have to take a new one and blood tests are more accurate in this case.

Pushing the sleeve up his arm to find his vein seeing as they weren’t blue or green but a dark gray, was something I didn’t notice before. I looked up to his eyes before continuing, he had a hard expression on his face dark eyes still focused over the syringe.

- it’s okay… - I softly mumble to him, bringing his attention back to my face - it won’t hurt, you know how is done.

- I do… it’s just… - he sighted.

- I know - I tell him, carefully running my thumb over the single gray vein on his arm - I’ll do it know.

He only nodded looking away from it. This time he moved a bit when I inserted the needle into his vein, his eyes looked at floor clouded at the motion.

Thankfully things like this didn’t took much longer and in a second I was done with it, pressing over the vein with a small cotton making sure no blood drops before sliding his sleeve back down.

- hey… - I bring his attention back to me, holding his hand softly.

He nodded slowly almost leaning towards me but I quickly took a step back, stoping him before anything happens. I gave him a small smile before turning around to give Jin the syringe and the small blood sample.

- just one more now - Jin said - should we go already?

- ah, we…

- yes, please - Yoongi interrupted before I could even ask him - the sooner we do this the sooner it ends.

- right… - Jin replied behind me already making his way toward the door.

I wait for Yoongi before making my way to Jin, taking the collar from the compartment beside the door. Yoongi is quick standing close to me lowering his head down a bit for me to close the metal collar around his neck.

Usually at time like this he would never miss the chance to stare deeply into my souls with his dark and glossy eyes but, now he looked anywhere but me. Blinking a couple of times before nervously hold into my coat, once I’m done with the collar I took his hand from my coat into my own.

He didn’t look at me but seemed to be a bit more calmer this time.

I could only wonder what might have gotten into him, Yoongi wasn’t knew to this kind of procedures so his reactions were unexpected to me.

All I could think about in that moment was make sure he was alright until we are done with the exams, I’m sure once we are alone he’ll talk to me about it.

It didn’t took much longer for us to get at the exam room, the entire way there I could notice how Yoongi only seemed to grow more anxious beside me. Unknowingly holding my hand tighter each time, if I didn’t trust myself I would’ve stop this right away. But the exam was a good thing for him, it might be very helpful in order to make the right adjustments for his health.

I didn’t minded Jin presence this time and kept myself close to Yoongi at all times, I wanted to make sure he knew I was there for him and wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him.

Once we got in the room I notice from our proximity how stiff he became at the sight of the room, stoping in front of him to change his attention from it to me.

- hey, Yoongi - letting go of his hand to hold his chin softly - I’m right here okay?

- okay…. - he murmured looking back at me.

- is alright if your nervous - I assure him.

- is everything alright? - Jin asked.

- yeah, I’ll prepare him for it you can wait in the other room - I tell him.

Jin nods giving us one last looks before leaving for the room right next to us, separated by a glass window.

I turned back to Yoongi who’s attention was back at the bed in the middle of the room, it was a scan exam done by a clinical machine above the bed.

Just like and x-ray but for your whole body.

- come with me okay? - I gently hold both his hands guiding him towards the bed.

As he sat over it i quickly undid the bottoms of his shirt to carefully place the electrodes on his chest, once I made sure his heart beat was shown on the computer beside the bed.

- alright we are almost… - I took one glance at him before everything completely changed right there.

He looked up at me almost out of breath, chest moving up and done quicker then before as a bit of sweat began to form over his forehead. He was in panic, his heart beat racing on the computer.

- Yoongi what happen? - I held his chin softly up brushing some of the sweat from his face.

- I can’t do this… - he swallowed hard - please y/n take me out of here…

He held into my coat harshly pulling me into him, tears forming under his eyes as he looked up at me.

I felt my heart breaking into a million pieces at the sight. All the abuse from Jin’s father right there in his eyes as he desperately held into me.

- I know Yoongi…. - I held his face softly between my hands - I’m right here for you okay, I’m not leaving you alone. We can do this together okay?

- y/n… - he mumbled leaning into my touch.

- I hate seeing you like this…. - I whispered - I promise this will only take one second, I’ll be right here with you please Yoongi? I have to make sure… I have to make sure they didn’t hurt you any deeper then this.

I softly traced his face with my fingers, cleaning the tears from his eyes.

He leaned towards me resting his face over my chest, hands still grabbing my coat as he brushed his hair feeling his breathing slowly began to go back to normal.

I could see Jin’s worried expression through the window on the wall, he knew better then interver in a moment like this. By now everyone knew how sensitive Yoongi could get when he is in defensive mode.

- you feel better now? - whispered to him having him slowly nod over my chest, I leaned back to see his face catching his dark glossy eyes - can we continue now?

- yes… I can do it - he murmured leaning back but still holding into me.

- I’ll be right here for you okay?

- okay.

I gave him an assured nod as he slowly began to lie down the bed, taking deep breathes as he kept his eyes on me the entire time. I held his pinky to make sure he knew I was right there for him before I tune to the glass window on the wall giving Jin a thumbs up.

Jin nodded to me and with a second the machine begging to move above Yoongi, first the light would scan the individual for then scan throughout his body.

The blue laser light of the magnetic resonance begin to scan his body from head to toe, then from down to up his head. With that the scan was done already.

Once the machine stoped Yoongi got up from the bed as quickly as possible and before I could say anything he pulled me in for a hug by the waist, chest moving up and down against mine as he breathes deep.

- see? I told you it was going to be quick - I told him, lifting my hands up to brush over his black hair.

- it’s the last time right? - he asked over my ear.

- it is Yoongi.

He sighted resting his head on my shoulder. The first step towards his new life has just started, knowing he must been through so much this kind of reaction we’re bound to occur.

But from now on Yoongi will be able to heal from all of this and I’ll be right here for him.

To be continued.

Notes: here is is finally! I hope you guys like this chapter and next update will be next week! See you guys soon! I’m sorry if it wasn’t so good the next chapters will be more interesting!! Thank you for reading my works ! 🫶🩷🩷🩷

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[medicalinjury]

Discussing the Associated Publicity When Opting to Pursue a Medical Negligence Case

In Australia, the publicity surrounding medical negligence cases is influenced by various factors. While some cases receive significant public attention, others remain private or less known. The level of publicity often hinges on factors such as the nature of the case, the parties involved, and the scope of litigation.

When a medical negligence case is filed in court, access to case records and hearings is subject to court regulations. Not all cases become public knowledge, as many individuals prefer to settle claims outside of court to maintain confidentiality and avoid public exposure.

Cases may attract publicity for various reasons, including their significance, impact on society, or broader implications beyond individual grievances. Instances involving widespread harm, public safety concerns, or those setting legal precedents tend to draw considerable attention, prompting public interest and discussion.

Publicity may increase if a case goes to trial, as court proceedings are generally matters of public record. Details discussed during trials can be accessible to the public, unless specific confidentiality orders are in place. Courts may use suppression orders or pseudonyms to protect identities, especially if disclosure could cause harm or distress. While some information remains inaccessible due to privacy and confidentiality provisions, media outlets may cover high-profile cases, contributing to their wider recognition.

Furthermore, certain organizations or advocacy groups may highlight specific cases to advocate for legal or systemic changes in the healthcare system. These efforts aim to address prevalent issues that may not always be widely recognized.

In summary, the extent of publicity for a medical negligence case in Australia depends on a combination of factors, including the case's nature, the parties involved, and its potential societal impact.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

Sending my request once again! (I think, don't rlly remember 😰) Full hc about the M6 with a MC in a coma?

The Arcana HCs: When MC falls into a coma

~ don't know if this is what you were going for but it turned into a sleeping beauty situation XD hope you enjoy! - brainrot ~

-- to set the scene --

It was an overcast day. The air had been unusually still ever since your lover had stepped out after breakfast to start their day, and you'd found your own set of tasks to be oddly uneventful ... and lonely. It's why, when an elderly grandfather hobbles by and offers you a warm bread roll, you don't hesitate to take a bite as soon as you've waved goodbye. You don't take a second.

Julian

He's had a long day at the clinic, and as short as his commute is, he still feels like he's been a hundred miles away from you as he heads over after sunset. He's missed you all day

He's sure he forgets how to breathe when he walks in to see you collapsed on the floor. He knows what corpses look like, he can tell you aren't dead, but that's little comfort when you don't wake up

Carrying you to bed and working feverishly to narrow down all the possibilities. You're not injured, you're not sick, your vitals seem to fine, but ... you don't wake up. Even smelling salts don't do it

Spends the next three days refusing to leave your side except to fetch more help or resources. The whole community helps him

Mazelinka brings soup, Portia and Nadia stop by with some rare medicines, Asra pops in at all odd hours with new spells to try, and even Barth sends a hot meal or two over from the Rowdy Raven

Julian doesn't leave until he gets a call in the middle of the night. A nearby neighbor has gone into labor, and needs attention until the midwife can arrive from across town

He kisses your hand goodbye on his way out and is too busy hustling out the door to hear you stir. His shout when he gets home several hours later to see you reading wakes half the city

Asra

They'd spent the morning out running errands and the afternoon catching up with their parents. It's been busy and interesting and they're excited to show you what they got you in the market

Except all of that goes tumbling out of his grasp when he walks in to find you collapsed behind the counter, unresponsive

Somehow they manage to get you upstairs and in bed through the daze, and then they get ready to work through the night

He does notice the partially-eaten bread roll and can tell there's some sort of powerful magic in it, but unraveling what it is proves harder than he expects. The next 24 hours blur by in a haze

At some point, Faust goes off to find Chimes and Flamel and Aisha and Salim appear at the back door to help out. When they see Asra's state, they urge them to get some rest while they take over

He makes up a layer of blankets on the floor next to you to sleep, not wanting to disturb your condition, but it feels wrong to close his eyes without the usual goodnight kiss (at 5 PM)

They lean over to press a gentle peck between your eyebrows, and the sight of you beginning to twitch awake makes them freeze in place. It might be too good to be true

And that's how you wake up, to an exhausted Asra collapsing onto your chest

Nadia

Horrified. She's already blaming herself for being too busy to check in on you earlier, you seemed fine this morning, but here you are in one of the entrance's side rooms collapsed since goodness knows

A quick check with the guards confirms they saw you speaking with a stooped old man at the gates just that afternoon - and the roll they saw him give to you is next to you on the floor

To say that she distracts herself from her pain by leaving you to the healthcare professionals and trying to make up for her negligence by hunting down your poisoner would be an understatement

She's a woman on a mission. She'll leave Chandra in your chambers to bring her any updates and start her investigation immediately

Can't really bring herself to be with you for too long when she believes it's her fault. It's two weeks before she sits down next to you to see how you're doing, after doctors suggested she talk

It's hard. She takes your hand in hers and stares at your motionless face, and all she's able to do is tell you everything she's done so far to find the old man as though it'll earn her your presence again

Only after that, as the sun starts to set and she runs out of things to say, does she lean down whisper her love into your ear and press a kiss to your cheek. The surprised "eep!" when you wake up is priceless

Muriel

Panics as soon as gets in, because his mind is already jumping to the worst possible conclusions about what he's seeing

Are you dead? Are you hurt? Were you attacked? Did a rogue wild animal make its way in and maul you? Did Lucio come back? Did the Devil come back? He should've kept you safe -

It's Inanna's insistent whining and nudging that gets him to carry you to the bed from where he's gathered you up. It's hard to check for your pulse when his hand won't stop shaking

Whatever's going on, it doesn't take long for him to realize that you're okay. You're okay, you're just ... asleep. And not waking up

He'll try taking a nap on the floor next to you until you do

It's as the next day drags on that he starts to worry that you might not be getting enough food or water. He still doesn't know if this warrants calling Julian (he'd rather not) but you need hydration

Thankfully he's kissed you plenty of times before, so it's not too nerve-wracking a task for him to take a sip of fresh spring water before pressing his mouth to yours and trying to help you drink

You didn't expect to wake up like this

Normally Muriel would be a little more grossed out about having water coughed all over his face, but he's too happy to care

Portia

If she walks into a room and sees you collapsed, she's screaming

She's screaming loud enough to be heard from the Palace, and then she's rushing towards and nearly sobbing in relief when your skin is warm and your chest is still moving steadily up and down

She doesn't know why you collapsed or what's wrong with you (if it's something she can't see, then she doesn't want to mess it up) so she avoids moving you until she has someone around to help

Ilya. She needs Ilya, and Mazelinka, and Nadia, and Asra too, and maybe all the names ending in "a"s if it'll help her figure out how to help you any sooner. She'll get you through this. It'll be okay

Between Nadia spotting the bread roll, Julian confirming that there isn't an obvious medical reason, and Asra and Mazelinka's combined magical food knowledge, it's obvious what happened

The delightful thing about a woman like Portia is that she doesn't like stopping to be sad when she knows there's still hope to work towards. Nobody knows the spell? Trial and error!

"True love's kiss" is the third thing on the list after failing to enter your dreams and dripping soup into your mouth. Waking up to Portia smugly telling her older brother that all those "fairy tales" were onto something after all is an unforgettable experience

Lucio

All he knows is that one moment, he was triumphantly announcing his return and very pleased with himself about completing a shopping trip that involved only wise spending choices

And the next moment, every wise spending choice was clattering to the floor because you weren't moving

He's been on enough battlefields to know the difference between wounded and dead, but you don't seem to be either

The worst part is, you're not waking up. No matter what he does, you don't wake up. He's seen this before - he remembers watching as a vengeful ghost as his ex-wife lay motionless for three years

Is that how long this is going to take? Three years? He's not worried about his loyalty, he'll find a place that'll take care of you while he picks up whatever jobs he needs to keep you afloat, but

What if he makes another "oopsie" and you're not there to help?

It all overwhelms him to the point that he lays his head down on your stomach to have a little moment to himself, and he turns his face against your shirt to catch any ... eye water

Apparently mouthing "I love you" against your belly button counts, because the next thing he knows you're lifting your head and asking what's wrong. He's not touching a bread roll again

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for taking my elderly, aggressive cat to a groomer?

My childhood cat is M16 going on 17. I lived with him for 13-14 years, and he’s always been very elegant and pretty. Growing up, he was meticulous about grooming to the point where it became a family in-joke that he was a movie star or a model or something in a past life. But he’s getting older now, and he had a particularly hard summer—in addition to slowly going blind, he escaped the house one night and no one could find him till the next morning, and which point he’d clearly been hit by a car or attacked by an animal. He had a broken leg and was slowly suffocating due to a hole in his lung, but somehow the old bastard pulled through and recovered surprisingly quickly (the vet clinic cheered when my parents gave them the update, it was so sweet).

While I’m beyond grateful that he’s still with us, when I came home for the holidays this year I noticed that he’s looking pretty rough. I keep seeing clumps of dirt (or whatever it is he’s getting into, at one point I swear it was chocolate despite my family NEVER leaving anything like that out where the cats can get into it) in his fur that he’ll just leave there. His back claws in particular look like they’re caked in mystery gunk. I don’t think he’s being neglected or anything, but between the blindness and all the crap he went through with his leg I don’t think he’s been able to keep up and groom himself as thoroughly as he used to. It looks really uncomfortable, especially considering how persnickety he was about keeping clean in the past.

I definitely don’t have the expertise to properly groom him myself, and given how old he is + his recent injury I don’t feel comfortable learning through youtube university and potentially hurting him. Problem is, he’s kind of a monster. He was half feral when we got him, and it shows. He’s sweet most of the time, but can get overstimulated with little warning and tends to bite or scratch when that happens. I don’t think he’s ever bitten anyone outside of the family, but he still makes the vet + vet techs’ lives a living hell when we take him for a checkup unless we drug him first. Even when we DO drug him, if he gets pissed enough he’ll sometimes fight through it and struggle and yowl as if he was 100% lucid. Old age has done nothing to temper this, when he got injured this summer he fought so hard at the clinic that they had to knock him all the way out just to get an x-ray.

It feels negligent to just let him be filthy now that I’ve noticed it, but I also don’t want to put an elderly animal AND an innocent groomer through an unnecessary amount of stress just because I think his paws look icky. *I* think he would be more comfortable if he was nice and clean, but he seems happy and perky so it’s very possible he doesn’t even care. I’ve never taken an animal to a groomer before and I have no idea what the etiquette is.

If tumblr doesn’t think it would be too bad, I’ll bring the idea of getting him professionally groomed up with my parents. If y’all think I’d be an asshole for putting him + a groomer through that, I’ll back off and let him live his best pigpen life.

Pet tax (blind old man in his “thank you for surviving” gift, a brand new heated bed):

What are these acronyms?

[thatsonemorbidcorvid]

“Every year, about 25,000 (UK) women who give birth — approximately 4 per cent — are so distressed that they meet the diagnostic criteria for post-traumatic stress disorder. That makes birth one of the biggest causes of PTSD in the UK according to the Birth Trauma Association charity – probably coming second only to sexual abuse and rape. Hundreds of thousands more women are traumatised. This is a major health crisis. And yet it is barely discussed…

According to figures from NHS Resolution, the arm of the Department of Health and Social Care that handles litigation, 62 per cent of the total clinical negligence cost of harm in 2022-23 (£6.6 billion) related to maternity.”

When my husband and I left for hospital on a Friday afternoon, we had no idea what would happen. The next few hours would change my life. For good and bad. It had all started with a cervical sweep the day before. I was 40 weeks and 4 days pregnant and, frankly, I’d had enough. My pregnancy had been uncomplicated in terms of my baby — she was healthy throughout, albeit had spent much of her time in the back-to-back position. But I had found the nine months increasingly difficult. From around 20 weeks I’d suffered from pelvic girdle pain, which, for me, meant increasingly agonising pain in my lower back. Walking and other everyday movements became difficult. The only place I felt vaguely comfortable was in water. Swimming was a relief.

Women are offered a sweep to help induce labour. A midwife inserts their finger and sweeps around your cervix. It’s about as basic as you can get. They’re trying to separate the membranes of the amniotic sac that surround the baby from your cervix. This then releases hormones, which may help start your labour. “Some women find the procedure uncomfortable or painful,” NHS guidelines say. I found it excruciating.

“Oh,” the midwife said, as I lay in a rather compromised position. “I might have broken your waters.” This didn’t make sense to me. I’d always assumed that when my waters broke, I’d know about it. Apparently not always, and I was instructed to call the hospital if contractions hadn’t begun within 24 hours as I was now potentially at risk of infection.

They didn’t start. And I did what I’d been asked. The voice on the phone was chirpy — everything sounded fine, stay at home, we’ll be seeing you soon enough. Half an hour later, my phone rang. “Where are you? You’re meant to be at the hospital,” the woman said angrily. I needed to come in immediately to be examined.

It was late Friday afternoon and it was busy. We took the last of the beds in maternity triage. And my waters broke in earnest. That solved the mystery, I suggested. No, I was told, and the water birth I’d hoped for was out of the question — too risky.

Strong and regular contractions started immediately. We were moved to a glorified cupboard that had been turned into a makeshift holding room. I was denied any pain relief because it was “too early”, and told that someone would bring me some paracetamol when they came to “examine” me.

It seems obvious when you think about it, but I had never been told what being “examined” meant. Nor thought about it. It sounds medical. But it’s literally a midwife sticking their fingers inside you. I was 3cm dilated. Plenty of time to go, apparently. It was 9.30pm. I felt sick and in enormous pain. Both were dismissed — until I vomited everywhere. And lost control of my bowels. This would happen several more times over the coming hours. I felt utterly ashamed. Again, it’s common — but I hadn’t been told.

I continued to ask for pain relief and continued to receive none. An hour later, I was 7cm dilated — in full labour — and finally received some paracetamol. There was no space on the labour ward. In just another half an hour, I was fully dilated and ready for the baby to come out. No one seemed to know what to do. The midwives were panicking. And that made me scared. This was my first baby. I didn’t know what to expect. We were rushed to the ward. Already, nothing had gone the way I wanted, or the way it had been talked about at National Childbirth Trust (NCT) classes. Eventually, I was given gas and air to ease the pain. But only for about 20 minutes. Apparently it was “distracting” me too much and I needed to push.

Two hours later there was still no baby and I was in agony. A doctor arrived, took a brief look and said cheerily, “You’re going to be fine. You’re going to get that baby out.” And then he left. My maternity notes state, “PLAN: continue pushing.” I have no idea what this refers to — like so many of my notes. There was no plan. If there was, it wasn’t one I had agreed to. Finally, after another hour the decision was made that the doctor would use a ventouse — a suction cup that sits on your baby’s head — to help deliver my baby. Apparently I consented to this, but I have no recollection of doing so. And I’m ashamed to say I didn’t know what was being asked of me. My doctor didn’t use the word ventouse. He used “Kiwi”, which is a type of ventouse. At the time, I didn’t know what either were.

I remember screaming in pain and then my daughter finally being born. She was placed on my chest for less than a minute. I was examined, told I had a fourth-degree tear that must be repaired and that I needed to sign a consent form for surgery straight away. “Look at the state of her,” my usually mild-mannered husband said. “How can she possibly sign a form?” I couldn’t. The writing on that form is barely legible, but they would not proceed without it.

I had no idea what had happened. I lay in an operating theatre in pain, silent tears rolling down my face. I was frightened. The anaesthetist was amazing and stayed with me while I was repaired. I am so grateful for that, at least. But I also feel guilty about it. It was half past three on a Saturday morning and she was the only anaesthetist on duty at the London hospital. Other women may well not have received the pain relief they needed because of me. “Will I be able to have any more children?” I asked as I stared at the ceiling.

After surgery I was moved to the high dependency unit (HDU) and reunited with my daughter. I finally held and fed her for the first time. That morning is a blur. My notes tell me we stayed in the HDU for five hours before being moved to a ward. It was there that I attempted to understand what had happened to me. I was in pain, barely able to move and soaked in blood. I asked various midwives to explain what had gone on. They repeated that I’d had a fourth-degree tear, but I didn’t know what that meant. One line, in scribbled handwriting, stands out when I look at my notes: “We don’t have any written info about fourth-degree tears.”

Eventually, a midwife appeared with some information they’d printed off after googling it. As I read it, I sobbed. I was 35 years old and thought my life was over; that I would be incontinent. And still no doctor came to explain. The medic who’d delivered my daughter was eventually marched to my bedside more than 48 hours later.

I am perhaps unusual in that I’ve always wanted children. We had done what many middle-class suburban couples did at that time and attended NCT classes. The underlying message of these was: try to avoid a caesarean section at all costs. “Natural” births were best, and even better just to breathe through it. No need for pain relief. I remember in our penultimate class bringing up the subject of tearing during labour. I had seen a TV feature on it that week and it struck me as important. “If most of us are going to tear to some degree, it would be really helpful to talk about that,” I remember saying. “It would be good to know how best to care for ourselves afterwards, that kind of thing.” The answer was no, there was no need. Instead, we proceeded to get on all fours and “moo” like cows and then practise putting nappies on a doll.

Up to nine in ten first-time mothers who have a vaginal birth will experience some sort of tear. The least invasive kind involves only the skin from the vagina and the perineum — the area between a woman’s vagina and anus. These tears usually heal quickly and without any treatment. Second-degree tears involve the muscle of the perineum and require stitches. Third and fourth-degree tears are the most serious. These involve not just tearing of the skin and muscle of the perineum but the muscle of the anus. In fourth-degree tears, the injury can extend into the lining of the bowel. These deeper tears need proper surgical repair under anaesthetic.

I don’t really have any happy memories of the first few days or weeks after we left the hospital. I was completely in love with my baby, but I felt shellshocked. I couldn’t process what had happened and there was no one who offered to help me. A different midwife was sent to our house every couple of days to weigh our daughter. I had no milk the first few days and she had lost a fair bit of weight. Even when my milk came in, I found breastfeeding painful and difficult, in large part because it hurt so much to sit down.

I cried quietly every day for several months. Often it would come completely out of nowhere. I’d be talking or watching television and I would just start to cry. Several midwives wrote in my notes in those early weeks the same phrase: “Mum is anxious.” I don’t think I was. I was traumatised. Several weeks later, I was told that I was “lucky” by the midwife examining my stitches. Apparently the doctors had done a “wonderful” job at repairing me and it looked “beautiful”. I now know that I was fortunate to be repaired properly and immediately after the birth. But the last thing I felt — then or now — was lucky.

After several months I desperately needed to have some control over my life again. I had never felt so helpless, lost and infantilised. But my overarching feeling was anger. I wrote to the chief executive and chair of the hospital to complain and was invited in for a debrief. The head of midwifery was lovely, apologised and followed through on her promise to try to prevent other women facing the appalling lack of communication I had. The hospital now has a specialist perineal health clinic too.

But the attitude of the consultant obstetrician whom I met with my husband floored us both. It was about six months after the birth, but I was still under the care of a consultant urogynaecologist. (I subsequently had two further operations: the first 14 months after giving birth to remove an undissolved stitch that was causing pain but hadn’t been spotted, and another six months after that.) My urogynaecologist had told me not even to consider giving birth vaginally again. The risk was too great, he explained. If I tore again, there was a 30 per cent chance I couldn’t be repaired and I’d be incontinent. The obstetrician said the opposite — don’t rule it out! I saw red. “How dare you,” I growled. I remember saying that he would never be so cavalier about a man’s body.

Every year, about 25,000 women who give birth — approximately 4 per cent — are so distressed that they meet the diagnostic criteria for post-traumatic stress disorder. That makes birth one of the biggest causes of PTSD in the UK according to the Birth Trauma Association charity – probably coming second only to sexual abuse and rape. Hundreds of thousands more women are traumatised. This is a major health crisis. And yet it is barely discussed.

“Birth trauma is a broad term, but generally it’s overwhelming distress that leads to a detrimental impact on well-being,” explains Susan Ayers, professor of maternal and child health at City University in London. Estimates “range massively”, she says, but having conducted research into birth trauma for almost 30 years, Ayers puts it at about a third. “If you ask women whether they thought they or their baby was going to die or be severely injured, then it’s around 19-20 [per cent] in the UK. But if people just ask women, ‘Was your birth traumatic?’ some of those estimates are up to 50 per cent.”

“I’M BEATRICE’S MUM,” EMILY SAID, introducing herself to a committee of MPs in March. “Beatrice died during labour at full term in May 2022.” Emily is one of a number of brave women who have shared their traumatic birth stories with the all-party parliamentary group (APPG) on birth trauma, during the first parliamentary inquiry into this issue.

“As soon as my labour started,” Emily explained, “I knew it wasn’t right, wasn’t normal.” The details are harrowing: a series of obvious but missed red flags and an attitude from medical professionals that can only be described as cruel. The midwife who shrugged her shoulders when Emily’s waters were meconium-stained; the consultant obstetrician who laughed at the “slimy” feel of that meconium while her hand was still inside Emily.

“The ultrasound scanning machine was brought in and showed that Beatrice’s heartbeat had stopped,” she explained. “At that point I begged, pleaded like I’ve never pleaded for anything in my life for a caesarean, and that consultant obstetrician refused. She said no. And she left.”

“It’s destroyed my life,” Emily says now. “I’m not the person I was before.”

This inquiry has been led by the APPG’s co-chairs, the Conservative MP Theo Clarke and Labour’s Rosie Duffield. They received more than 1,200 written submissions after asking women to share their experiences; that number doubles if you count the letters and emails they’ve been sent informally.

“The thing that’s really struck me is there seems to be a taboo around talking about the risk of childbirth,” Clarke tells me when I sit down with both women in Westminster. There shouldn’t be, she adds. “Something we’ve heard from a number of the mothers coming to speak to us is that there’s such a focus on the baby post-delivery, they almost forget there’s a second patient in the room, and that’s the mother.”

“I was constantly told by GPs that I had nothing wrong with me,” one mother, Sarah, told the MPs. She experienced a major tear that doctors and midwives failed to diagnose. “I was discharged two days later with [an] untreated tear, which very quickly led to enormous amounts of pain, incontinence, faecal incontinence and thinking I was going mad.”

“It’s very painful,” explained Jenny, who also experienced a serious tear that was left untreated, “but the long-term consequences of an unrepaired tear are that I had to give up my job. I’ve suffered PTSD, anxiety, depression. My activities are restricted. My life is impacted in that I have to meticulously plan my day around toilets.”

Another mother, Neera, lost three litres of blood and required more than ten hours of life-saving emergency surgery the day her daughter was born. The haemorrhage had not been picked up by staff. She said she is fortunate to have had the “means and support” to access mental healthcare over four and a half years of her five-year-old’s life. “I have personally spent over £6,000 and received more than 50 hours of mental health support,” she told parliament.

The women who have spoken to politicians as part of the inquiry had different medical experiences. But there were obvious similarities. Their concerns and their pain were dismissed. They were not treated with respect or, in some cases, like human beings. They felt helpless, angry and scared. “Nobody really cares about women,” says Kim Thomas, CEO of the Birth Trauma Association. “What we tend to find with most of these stories is there’s failure after failure after failure. Lots of things go physically wrong… and that continues afterwards in the postnatal period with really poor care.” Almost all women seeking out the charity say their experience was made much worse by the way they were treated during labour. “The number of stories we hear of women being shouted at by midwives or laughed at by midwives is quite extraordinary.”

Birth doesn’t have to be this way. And it isn’t for many women. But women, in England in particular, could — and should — be having better experiences than they are.

Let’s start with serious tears. The number one risk factor is being a first-time mum. There’s nothing much that can be done about that. But the next is having an instrumental vaginal delivery — and in particular one that uses forceps. “Data indicates that we use more forceps than other parts of Europe,” says Dr Ranee Thakar, president of the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists (RCOG). While rates in several European countries hover at around 0 per cent, a 2023 study of assisted births in 13 high-income countries found England used forceps in a higher proportion of births — about 11 per cent — than any other.

There are cases where forceps must be used. When babies are premature, suction would cause too much damage to the head. But that’s doesn’t explain the discrepancy. “It’s education,” Thakar explains. “We should be trained to do both [forceps and ventouse], so that we provide the best care to women and use the right instrument for the right baby and the right mother.”

The risk of a severe tear when forceps are used is at least twice as high as with ventouse: 8-12 per cent compared with 4 per cent. Women should be told this. The recent parliamentary inquiry heard other suggestions that might explain why forceps use in England is so high. The consultant gynaecologist and obstetrician Dr Nitish Raut explained that when poor outcomes of childbirth become part of litigation, the question, “Why were forceps not applied earlier?” will be asked. Although they can cause injury to mothers, forceps are the most effective instrument for getting a baby out. If a doctor tries and fails to deliver a baby with the less invasive ventouse first, a record will be made at the hospital trust. It was suggested by others that this might also be pushing some doctors straight to forceps use even when they might not be necessary.

“Training is a really key part of everything here,” Posy Bidwell, deputy head of midwifery at South Warwickshire Foundation Trust, told MPs. “If we can train people, we can prevent these injuries happening. Many midwifery students wouldn’t know the impact that these injuries are having on women.”

Newly qualified midwives did not know enough about perineal damage, and yet they’re providing one-to-one care to women. Current training did not seem to see it as a priority: while several aspects of maternity care are mandatory each year, suturing and perineal protection are not.

Neither doctors nor midwives appear to be taught how to routinely examine women after they have given birth either. Where this was once part of mandatory medical training, doctors are no longer encouraged to do it, Raut explained.

England is short of as many as 2,500 midwives, the Royal College of Midwives (RCM) estimates, although people are wanting to train and join the profession. Donna Ockenden, who is reviewing maternity services at Nottingham and who previously did so at Shrewsbury and Telford Hospitals NHS Trust, cautions against being too optimistic, however. The focus needs to be on retention. “Two midwives don’t equal two midwives,” she told parliament, “of we are losing midwives with 20, 30, 35 years’ experience… and they’re then being replaced by a more junior workforce, who are not being supported in those early days of their career.”

In the past decade and a half, the UK has seen several NHS maternity scandals — in Morecambe Bay, Shrewsbury and Telford, and East Kent. In all these cases, some of the poor care provided to mothers and their babies was because of a push towards “normal” or “natural” birth and a desire to keep caesarean section rates low. The RCM ended its campaign for “normal births” in 2017, but its legacy persists. Some NHS trusts still talk about them today. A culture of cover-ups and a lack of care remains in others. Just last month, the Care Quality Commission found that staff at Great Western Hospital in Swindon had been downgrading third and fourth-degree tears, “which meant they were not investigated as thoroughly as they should” have been. The c-section target was only officially dropped in 2022. Does RCOG now accept that it was a mistake? “It’s difficult for me to say years later whether it was a mistake or not,” Thakar tells me. “I think there was a general trend at the time to put figures to caesarean section rates. But now we know that, we don’t do that.” It was now right that women were offered a choice; she insists she hasn’t seen an attitude against caesareans more recently.

Aside from any physical and psychological impact, traumatic births are costing the country billions. According to figures from NHS Resolution, the arm of the Department of Health and Social Care that handles litigation, 62 per cent of the total clinical negligence cost of harm in 2022-23 (£6.6 billion) related to maternity. Of the £2.6 billion spent on clinical negligence payments that year, £1.1 billion (41 per cent) related to maternity. (As the fact-checking service Full Fact explains, the cost of harm differs from the amount actually paid out in compensation: the former includes an estimate of claims expected in the future arising from incidents in that financial year.) The year before, maternity services accounted for 60 per cent of the total clinical negligence cost of harm (£13.6 billion). NHS England spends about £3 billion a year on maternity and neonatal services.

There is such a long way to go. The government is well behind on its long-term target of halving the rates of stillbirth and neonatal mortality by 2025; the death of mothers within 42 days of the end of pregnancy is at its highest rate in almost 20 years. And while only a handful of trusts have been subject to official investigations, there are signs that poor care is happening across the country. Only half of maternity units in England are rated good or outstanding; one in ten is inadequate. That is a damning indictment of the way so many women are cared for.

One crucial area of improvement does not cost money at all. It requires a shift in attitude to one where women are treated with respect, listened to and allowed to make informed decisions about their bodies and babies.

When I first heard of parliament’s inquiry into birth trauma, it was never my intention to share my experience. Doing so has been upsetting and uncomfortable. But as I sat listening to other women talk about how giving birth had affected them so profoundly, it felt dishonest to stay quiet. Difficult births are not something we should feel ashamed of — much as I know many women will have been, myself included.

[despazito]

following this story on twitter of a person whose cat very unfortunately had a severe reaction to general anesthesia (10 minute cardiac event) that may be left permanently blind but the owner is livetweeting being very..not a good client about it

it's very tragic but anesthesia is never zero risk for animals or humans. you can have the most qualified doctor with the gold standard of care and bad outcomes can still happen, it's not malpractice or negligence. she's going on about lawyering up, getting the vet fired, calling the vet a bitch, and sharing photos of the clinic. ma'am you will be very very lucky if that practice or any in the general area who've witnessed your tantrum takes on you and your cat again.

be thankful those doctors resusd your cat after TEN MINUTES of cardiac arrest, that is very lucky and shows the opposite of negligence. and ofc they don't know shit about its prognosis, its been less than 24 hours it would be irresponsible if they DID confidently tell you the prognosis. i know this is likely one of the worst days of her life but this is not the way..

[writingshushf1]

Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!

Summary: the one where going back to your hometown is never a good idea.

Rating: +18

Warnings: pure angst (w/ a happy ending), derogatory language, psychological trauma, negligent parents, mentions of abuse, anxiety, depression, mentions of teen pregnancy, ab*rtion, self-harm, addiction and ending your own life

Word count: 8.5k

Note: it’s a very loooong and heavy fic, all the possible triggers are mentioned above, so please see them before you read this one, because it has a lot of uncomfy moments. I wrote it originally around christmas (so themed fanfic?), also available in my ao3.

masterlist

The cold wind whipped against her body and she shivered slightly, the city was colder than expected. She looked around, people walking, chatting; she knew most of them, many had not changed at all since leaving the city for a better life. Since the day she finished high school, she swore she would never set foot in that city again, yet there she was. The only cousin she still considered family, recently had her second child, so the relative begged her to spend some time together; as she was busy, the only time off she could extend was precisely during the holidays.

Going back to that city gave her the creeps, she didn't like to remember everything she'd been through here. Still, she would never deny a request coming from her cousin, since whenever her relative had time, she would go visit her in London.

Her story was a complicated one. A high school plagued with problems at home - her parents never stopped fighting and consequently all the marital problems reflected on her, physically and psychologically. Several times she wished the world would take her away from that suffering. Not only that, but inside the school she was excluded, considered as stupid and someone who would not have a promising future, as a girl who only served the body, since the mind was empty. Boys cheated on their girlfriends with her, turned her into an inside joke, while girls hated her for everything. It was all jokes and games until she got pregnant when she was 16. Her parents freaked out, Christmas that year was terrible, her father's screams were so loud that the neighbours could hear his swearing.

She managed to get to London, going to a public clinic and begging the secretary to have the procedure done without her parents' permission, then she would just use the excuse of having had a miscarriage. That night on December 24th, sitting on the curb, looking at the Christmas lights in the big city, she had promised she would live there.

Until she turned eighteen, she tried to be erased from other people's memories of the city, just doing the school-home commute, doing all the endless chores demanded by her father - since her mother was too busy with her face stuffed into a glass of wine, and making enough money to get out of there through nights working as a cleaner at the roadside diner. It wasn't glorious, her past still ached in her heart, having this profound journey when you're only a teenager had scarred her life. Her cousin, Rosie, was still the light at the end of the tunnel in all this chaos she could call her past; the one who paid for her train tickets to the capital had been her, the one who fetched her from unpleasant encounters with boys who purposefully sought her out for an easy fuck, the one who fought with men for harassing her, the one who was there when she tried to take her own life and stood by her hospital bed while she became an even bigger laughing stock, not only among her peers but also in her entire family, who proudly pushed her away from everything they could.

So going back to that epicentre of her traumas was what she was doing for her cousin, a way of thanking her for everything she had done to keep her alive.

In 12 years, a person can change a lot; her hair was no longer in its natural colour, her body was strong, her head held high and the confidence that was built in many intense therapy sessions; plus an overcoming of an addiction. Some people recognised her on the street, with shocked expressions at seeing her dressed so well, others ignored as soon as she said hello and there were also those who pulled nasty conversations - obviously those who peaked in high school and were now in mediocre jobs. She responded with the utmost happiness, being in a job that valued her and still paid well was a difficult thing these days.

The woman parked her bike in front of her cousin's house, looking around, the houses were still the same, just some renovations or painting. That feeling of panic started to hover, her old house was across the street, right in front of her cousin's house. She took a few seconds to remove her helmet and grab her backpack, walking in dragging steps down the driveway, knocking on the door lightly. Nobody answered, how strange. She sighed loudly, looking at the time on her mobile phone, she was probably shopping. She walked slowly and sat on the steps, watching the movement on the street; she sent some messages to Rosie, who answered, apologising for the wait, but the line at the supermarket was huge.

Suddenly, a black Mercedes stopped there, almost crushing her bike. She stood up quickly, to check if there was any damage, ready to curse the reckless driver. A dark-skinned man with braided hair and fancy clothes stepped out of the driver's side, looking straight at her and walking calmly towards her - which made the woman's blood boil even more.

"Oy! Sorry for almost messing up your bike, I didn't mean to."

"Mate, you're lucky nothing happened." She retorted, looking the motorbike up and down.

"Oh... Okay, you don't need to get mad at me." He raised his arms and she rolled her eyes.

Before they could continue their conversation, Rosie parked her car, flashing a smile at the sight of her. She ran over and hugged her tight, which removed her tough-guy composure in front of the stranger. The older woman looked at the man who was standing there, who was waiting for the other man's answer, for a few seconds they stood still, until the owner of the other car went to him, hugging the man, who smiled and kissed her cheek back.

“Lewis freaking Hamilton, you’re back home!” The blond said to him. “The only time of the year we can actually see each other. I bloody missed you.”

“Me too. Fancy a cuppa?” He said, letting her go.

“Oh! I- I don’t know! My cousin just arrived and I need to set her down, right?” Rosie looked at her, circling her short arms around her younger cousin’s shoulders. “Maybe tomorrow! You and bring your niece and nephew, Bandit will love to have a playdate with them.”

“Deal.”

They dispersed, with the women going to the eldest house, while Hamilton headed to his parents' house.

Rosie's house was cosy, family photos on the walls, very colourful and well decorated. The blonde showed around, finally showing the room she would be staying in; there were a couple of clean towels, soap, shampoo and conditioner on top of a neatly made bed. The room was smelly and well lit, even if it was small, it gave a feeling of comfort.

"You can go pack your things, I'll start dinner. Jam is with the baby, he's gone for a routine doctor's appointment and will pick Bandit up from school later." She placed a hand on her cousin's shoulder. "Thank you for being here, you don't know how grateful I am to welcome you into my home."

"Only you could bring me to this place again."

They both cracked a warm smile, with the older one walking off and leaving the girl alone with her thoughts. She grabbed one of the towels, the toiletries and went to shower in the en suite bathroom. After undressing, she spent a few seconds staring at her body in the mirror, the scars across her torso that revealed her past, the stretch marks along her breasts and belly that hid a story she preferred to keep to herself. She took a boiling bath, letting the water do its effect and easing the pain in her back from driving on the motorbike all day. When she got out, she had only the fluffy towel wrapped around her body, she walked over to the bed, opening her backpack and pulling out a sweatshirt and trousers, she was too distracted by what she was going to wear to notice that her window faced the neighbour's window - which was consequently the room where Lewis Hamilton was staying and in the same situation as she was, with a towel around his waist after a hot shower, choosing a comfortable outfit. They both raised their heads at the same moment, exchanging a few seconds of eye contact, which was soon broken by the girl pulling back the curtain of her window. The man was visibly intrigued, his cheeks reddened by the intimate moment with the stranger.

In parallel, she went to dinner with her cousin and her family, while he had fun with his family, his niece and nephew running around the house.

…...................................................

During the afternoon tea they arranged, Rosie hosted not only for Hamilton, but also his entire family. The Londoner knew him very well, they were the same age, went to the same school from kindergarten to high school; she didn't know where to stick her face, her parents would recognise her too, she was a big topic among the adults in town. She tried to keep calm the whole moment, focusing her attention on Bandit, who called her to play together with the other children, she would surely thank him later, probably giving her some exaggerated and expensive gift. When it was time to eat, she walked further behind the children, helping her cousin set the table for afternoon tea, avoiding looking her neighbours in the face. She sat down next to the little boy who saved her skin, helping him serve himself and soon after putting food on his plate. She hated eating with strangers, however she would try her best for Rosie.

"I feel like I know you." one of Hamilton's sisters said to the woman.

"You probably do, this town is small and we are always bumping into each other." She shrugged.

His sisters seemed to have recognised the girl, however they kept quiet on that subject for the rest of the day.

By the time night was coming on, it was just her and Hamilton, sitting on the front steps of the house. The silence was not awkward, much less uncomfortable, it seemed they understood each other without any words being exchanged.

"Sorry about yesterday, I was a brat with you, mate." She said low.

"Nah, it's alright, I guess you're just a bit of a crikey... As my teammate would say it." He cracked a smile, as a result she lightly slapped his arm, which earned a laugh from both of them. The silence lasted a few more seconds after they stopped laughing, then he broke it. "My half-sisters know you."

"Yeah? One of them commented today, but we didn't follow up on it."

"They told me some things that got me gutted." Oh no, here it comes. The judgement, the past mistakes being brought on by this guy you barely knew.

"What did they say?"

"Well... We already knew a little about your parents, but they told me how you were treated in high school." She felt a wave of emotions invade her body, she didn't know whether to start swearing at him, or cry, or run far away. "It wasn't fair." Lewis said low, wiggling his fingers in each other's. "And I'm sorry my sisters never did anything to prevent it."

"It's not their fault those people were a bunch of arses." She stood, ready to go inside.

"Hey, wait!" He stood as well, holding her wrist so she couldn't leave, pulling her against his body in a warm hug. She closed her eyes, feeling the embrace, it was so good to just let it go.

They kept hugging for a while, him running his fingers through her back and she was squeezing the fabric of his hoodie.

“Tomorrow, there will be the Christmas event downtown, want to come with me? A lot of people from my former friend group will be there.” He said. “If you don’t want to, it’s okay, there will be people you know from your high school too, but I would love to have a good company so I can be there sober.” He chuckled at the end, to make the request lighter.

The ask came with a shock, they knew each other for 48 hours and he seemed so comfortable to be with her. She also felt amazing, the way he listened and cared about his relatives, during the afternoon he would often check on the kids, bring them snacks, then talk with the women about the most varied subjects, which made her question what he worked on. Lewis looked hopeful, waiting for a response.

“Okay, only because you’re a good one, but if people start giving me the shits, we’ll leave and for revenge, you’ll watch the Grinch with me; because I’m his reeincarnation and it’s the best coping mechanism.”

“Oh. So you hate Christmas?” He was way focused on the details then the overall request.

“Of course, bad things always happen on this daft holiday.”

“So my job is to make you see like I do. The past is already gone, we should celebrate the present and hope for the future, darling.”

“So I’ll wait for tomorrow night to be the best of my life?” She teased, feeling her heart beating faster than usual.

“It will be, trust me.”

…............................................

She was getting ready, happier and more nervous than usual, she wanted to look good, obviously the motive didn't pass through her mind. Rosie was walking down the corridor, but stopped when she smelled the citrusy perfume in her guest’s bedroom; the woman smiled, looking at her cousin, who was putting some makeup on.

“Ooh, getting fancy? For whom may I ask?” The older one leaned on the door frame.

“Lewis invited me to go to the Christmas event, he doesn’t want to go alone, maybe people won’t bother him as much.” She answered, grabbing her purse and fixing her beanie.

“Right.” Her irony could be spotted from miles away. “A smoking hot single guy asking you to go out with him in a sorta romantic setting is just because he doesn’t want to be surrounded by people from his past.”

“Rosie… Shut up! We’re going as friends and if it’s too daft, he’ll be forced to watch Grinch with me.”

“Not romantic, at all.” She chuckled and the doorbell rang. “It’s your prince charming!”

“I swear to God, you’re such an arse!” The girl ran downstairs right after the blonde one, seeing that she was talking with him, so the younger one stopped on her tracks, smiling nervously.

“There you are.” Lewis said, with his beautiful bright smile. “Looking amazing, love.” She walked towards him, smacking his arm slightly.

“You’re so cheeky.”

“And you’re lovely.” He responded, hooking their arms together. “Let’s go before we get late.”

They waved at Rosie, going to his car.

….................................................................

“I’m nervous.” She said, playing with her ring. “People still look at me weird.”

“It’s horrible.” He sighed. “I know my situation is way different from yours, but I understand this feeling, those racist pricks who talked shit and said I would never be a successful driver and here I am.”

“Oh… Really?” She put a hand on his shoulder slightly, squeezing it before lowering to her thigh again. “This must be a very silly question to you…”

“What?”

“A driver? Hum… I know I’ve seen your face somewhere but, what do you do? I mean... Driver?” Her cheeks were bright red.

“Formula One driver.” He smirked, it was a nice change to go out with someone that wasn’t interested in his fame or fortune, a woman that wanted him for him, his company, his odd sense of humour and a lot of style.

“Oy. That’s why.” She chuckled. “You must be really good then.”

“Seven titles and counting.” His cheekiness made her stomach flutter. “How about you?”

“I work on the creating process of a clothing brand for kids. It’s nice and colourful, my office? Full of stuffed toys, different wallpapers, one day I’ll show you.” She was proud about her work, it was something that made her happy, connected with a part of her life that she had lost and it was a good salary.

“I would love to.” He parked his car. “The way you talk about it, it’s lovely.”

They got out of the car and quickly he hooked her arm with his, walking through the closed street of the city centre. Immediately she felt the eyes on them, people whispering and trying to be discreet while taking pictures of them. He looked at her with a reassuring smile, muttering ‘everything is going to be okay’. Some kids ran to him, asking for pictures, which he happily complied, hugging them and taking his time with them while she was standing a bit further, cracking a smile on how gentle he was. However, things weren't perfect, so when she looked at the parents of the kid, her smile fell; the woman slowly came closer to her, saying her name.

“The one and only.” She answered, uncomfortable.

“I haven't seen you since…”

“We’ve finished high school. A long time ago.”

“Oh… Yeah.” The ginger was checking her from head to toe, with a disgusted expression. “You changed a lot.”

“London does wonders to you.” She joked, passing her hand around her neck, looking away. “Anyway! You stayed here?”

“Yeah, me and Rob went to university in the neighbouring city and then came back, we got married and had our beautiful boys.” Oh wow, how cliche. “And you?”

“Got out of here and tried. Failed a couple of times…” She chuckled, looking at Hamilton. “And now working in the creative process of…” She saw the kids come back, excitedly from meeting their idol and she immediately noticed the brand of their jackets. “The brand your kids are using right now.”

Lewis walked back at her, putting his hand on her shoulder, analysing the situation and seeing her slightly uncomfortable.

“Impressive.” The passive-aggressiveness in her voice was enough for the British man.

“Well, I’m very sorry to interrupt the chat, but we have to keep going if we want to get the best hot chocolate before it’s over.” He put the other hand on her shoulder, slightly massaging it. “Maybe we’ll have another free time to catch up.” With that, he held her hand pulled away from the couple, waving goodbye to the kids.

“Thank you.” She murmured and he held her hand stronger than before.

He stopped at the hot chocolate booth, buying for both of them and they kept walking. They didn’t know when they intertwined their fingers or started to walk closer, sharing small smiles and more intimate conversations, although none of them wanted this moment to stop. The beautiful stage prepared for the local band to play was ready and people started to gather around. Hamilton insisted on buying some street food for both of them to share while they listened to the mayor talk and all the boring speeches.

More judgmental looks from people were shot at them and she recognized all of them, which hurt more than expected. When the music started to play, the man let his body loose, moving with the rhythm and she got closer to him, letting Lewis pass his hands around her waist and rest his head on her shoulder, looking at the stage. She closed her eyes for a moment, breathing in and out, feeling the things around her, the sounds and the smells; she knew herself too much to know she was close to a panic attack, not because of him, but all the situations since they got out of the car.

“Alright, love?” He whispered.

“Bit rubbish, but I’ll be fine.”

He hugged her closer, leaning his forehead against the side of her head, murmuring the lyrics and swaying in a slow pace. It was good, she still let her eyes closed, calming herself down; he was just the best to be around. She lowered her hands, putting on top of his and caressing slowly, the feeling of it was nice, his cold rings against the warm skin. At her head, the words of Rosie before the date repeated over and over, that it was an actual date and he didn’t invite her only as a friend. They only backed off from each other to clap when the band was finishing, now some regional singers would be up and people were more interested. The passionate looks between them were so intense that they took a time to see someone calling for her name; she got out of the trance, whispering ‘fuck’ a few times, before putting a fake smile.

“I thought you were dead or something, you vanished from earth.” the brunette smiled.

“I moved out. London.” She looked at Lewis, who held her hand. He was already in flight or fight mode.

“Wow, I never thought someone like you would do so…” The woman dragged the ‘o’ while looking at the driver. “Well in life. At least get someone as incredible as Sir Hamilton.”

The brunette’s partner approached them too, with whatever he went to grab to his noisy girlfriend. Oh shit. She felt like she was sixteen again, the guy who was already in university and went after a sixteen year old girl because women of age wouldn’t want to be with him, nevertheless got her knocked up by lying to her. She held Lewis’ hand tighter, looking at him and back at them.

“Hey! You.” The guy pointed at her. “It’s been a while.” He smiled, looking at his partner. “Hamilton! I haven't seen you since the big school reunion… It was what? In 2018.”

“Yeah, long time, mate.” He said, trying to maintain as neutral as possible.

“I didn’t think you would be with someone… You didn’t seem the relationship type of person.” The guy said, sipping on his drink. “Because, you know… Your… History.”

The driver was close to beating that man up, however he knew the girl holding his hand, almost crying, would not like the attention, so he got closer to her, running his thumb around her hand, trying to calm both of them down.

“I’m sorry! Uhm… Sometimes Patrick doesn’t shut up.” She tugged at him with his arm. “He likes to keep honest, right?” Of course she would stand by him. “I mean, you had quite a bad reputation…”

“You can say it.” The girl in a verge of tears said, taking a deep breath. “You kept your whole adolescence saying it. It won’t hurt you, I know that.”

“Fine.” The brunette crossed her arms. “I hope you really knew about this Sir.” She looked at Hamilton. “But this lovely girl with you was the biggest whore in our high school and it wasn’t just rumours, she even got knocked up and claimed that lost the baby. So if I was you I would stay away, she’s just into your money and body.”

Lewis didn’t answer, just pulled his girl away and walked to his car again, trying to not call as much attention as that horrible couple already tried. Meanwhile, her head was low, no response, just some sniffles; her head was full of different voices saying all the horrible words she heard during high school, the rumours and how they treated her in that time. It was the first time in years that she felt the need to drink herself into forgetting her own name. The dark-skinned man opened the car door for her, but before he did, he lifted her face with his fingers, seeing her eyes glistening from tears; his first reaction was to take her in his arms, hugging her gently, running his fingers through her hair as the woman held back her crying. He kept holding her for a few minutes, until she broke away from the hug, sitting on the car seat, looking at him and murmuring 'thank you', in reaction, he kissed her forehead, closing the door and going to the driver's side.

The drive home was quiet, only the radio filling the silence of the car. The worried glances from the driver left her even more cringed in her seat. When he parked in the garage of his family's house, he made a point of getting out of the car first to open the door for her and escort her to her cousin's house. She hadn't said a word yet, much less acted beyond walking, so he pressed the doorbell and saw Rosie's worried look settle on both of them, yet she hurried off to her room, not even saying goodbye to their date.

"What happened?" The older woman's expression was serious.

"People from her past. They were horrible, no matter how hard she tried to be nice.... I pulled her out of a conversation before it got any worse and brought her back." He bowed his head, he was disappointed in himself, he had planned a nice date and hoped to see her smiling, enjoying life and leaving the bad feelings the city left in her. "I should have protected her, but I didn't want to make a scene. I know she would have hated being the centre of attention again. More than she already would have been for hanging out with me."

"Lew..." Rosie put her hand on his shoulder. "I know you just wanted to have a nice night out with her.... I know what you see in her. Don't give up, just... The people in this town can be the worst."

"That's exactly why I left here." He muttered.

"Well, she commented on the Grinch movie before she went out with you."

"Oh! Yeah, in case the night was bad, but I imagine she doesn't want to watch it now."

"Come in. Go into the bedroom and ask about the movie. She doesn't want to be alone."

He walked slowly up the stairs, he was nervous, afraid of what her reaction would be to him being there, somehow invading her personal space. Lewis took a deep breath before knocking on the bedroom door at the end of the hall.

"Not now, Rosie..." The woman said in a tearful voice.

"It's me, love." He said low and the door was suddenly opened.

She had her make-up all smeared on, now wearing a sweatshirt twice her size, pyjama trousers and slippers. The pilot stood leaning against the door frame, watching her.

"I remember you talking about Grinch..." He watched her expression soften, making room for him to enter.

He removed his coat, cap and shoes, sitting on the edge of the bed. She handed him a pair of slippers, before sitting down next to him.

"I don't know where the TV control is." She said.

"So... Go clean your face, take that makeup off, even take a shower if you have to, and I'll get Rosie to help me find it. And also for her to make some tea, bring some snacks and we'll watch the movie together. The two of us or she can come watch it with us and we'll be here..." He wiped the tears that were falling from her face. "To be with you. You can cry, feel angry, feel sad.... We will listen and take you in."

"You don't exist." He laughed, a little confused. "Seriously, Lewis, you just took me in.... Even though people are telling me about my past."

"But I'm seeing you from now, a woman who bloody loves her job, her cousin to the point of coming to the place that gave her trauma to be with her, someone brave who never gave up on what she wanted. Someone amazing that people insist on hurting." She hugged him one more time before he got up and went after Rosie, who was anxiously waiting at the edge of the stairs.

"Alright?"

"Where's the TV remote?" He asked.

"In the second drawer in the desk."

"The three of us are going to watch Grinch." The man smiled. "We just need a cuppa and get some snacks."

Rosie chatted with her husband and kissed him goodnight before packing everything up by the pilot and heading to the room where her cousin was. They put the movie on the television, with the younger girl lying in the middle of the two of them. Rosie hugged her, running her fingers between strands of her hair, while Hamilton felt his hand being pulled by the girl, leaving her back against his right leg. He knew she wasn't paying that much attention, from feeling her fingers wander through his rings, so he squeezed account of her fingers, seeing the smile that appeared on the woman’s face.

They ended up sleeping all scrunched up together before the half of the movie.

….................................................

When morning came, Lewis left a note on the table next to her mobile phone, written.

"hey, had to go home, text me when you wake up. your cousin has my number. - Love, LH"

It was December 24th, Christmas Eve. She woke up around noon, alone in bed. The girl didn't want to get up as soon as she remembered all the humiliation of the day before, being called a slut in front of the man she was having a chance to have something with. She sighed loudly, getting up and going after her mobile phone, finding his note. A smile appeared on her lips, he was the best person she could have ever met.

After putting on some comfortable clothes, she went downstairs and made herself a cup of tea, soon hearing the front stall open and Bandit rushing over to her. The woman cracked a smile and took the boy in her arms, watching Rosie with the baby and Jamie with the groceries.

“Oh, look who’s up! Good morning.” The husband smiled, leaving the groceries on the table.

“Oy, Jams.” She smiled, getting her nephew a cup of water.

“How are you feeling, darling?” Rosie said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“Better.” She sighed. “By the way, do you have his number?”

“Oh, someone is fancying Lewis?” Jamie asked, putting the groceries away.

“Maybe. But don’t be cheeky, we’re just trying our luck, okay?”

“Sure! But he’s buff! And tidy.”

“You’re so cheesy, baby.” Rosie kissed him on the cheek.

She got his number and by 2pm, she laid on the bed, texting him.

oi! It’s me ;)

lh: me who?

lh: jk

lh: good to know you went after my number

after yesterday?

i would be an arse if i didn’t

lh: ok

lh: you have a point

anyway

thanks for yesterday, even if it didn’t go as you planned

i’m happy

you’re the kindest

lh: anything for you

maybe we could go out again?

before new years?

lh: i would love to

but maybe a home date

nothing in public

not wanting to repeat yesterday's horror

lh: agreed

The day was very quiet, they stayed at home and prepared everything that would be needed in the evening and on the 25th, being with the couple was such a relaxing thing, they were amazing people who were always available for a chat and were grateful that she was so committed to helping them. During the afternoon she played with her nephew in the backyard, making a snowman, snow angels and a little snowball war. Even though the day marked more than one bad memory in her life, she would not let it hold her back, for she is living in her present and not in the past.

From afar, she could also see Lewis playing with his niece and nephew inside the house. The woman cracked a smile at that, waving to him as soon as the man noticed.

Meanwhile, Hamilton had just stopped playing with the children, making his way to the kitchen and watching his half-sisters chatting. He grabbed a cup of tea and sat down at the table, picking up his mobile phone and trying not to pay attention to their conversation until they decided to include him.

"So you went out with her?" One asked.

"We heard some rubbish things. Of you walking out of the middle of a conversation and pulling her along."

"And that you didn't want to hear what they were saying about her."

"They called her a slut." He replied, not taking his eyes off his phone.

"Well..."

"People change." He shrugged. "She didn't want to go out downtown. She hates Christmas and those stuff, but she still went with me and people were fucking arseholes to her." The pilot sighed, remembering the image from the night before, her running into the bedroom, her face wet from tears. "She doesn't deserve this nonsense hate that her old classmates have for her."

"You didn't spend the night at home." They changed the subject before he got too angry.

"Yeah? And?"

"You were with her?"

"Yes. Rosie and I lay with her and watched a movie, she slept cuddled in the middle of us." He took a deep breath, leaving his cup in the sink. "She's changed. She's a grown woman who still bloody suffers from everything she's done, but at least she's managed to get back on her feet and live her life."

He left the kitchen, going to the back of the house.

From then on, days 24 and 25 passed quickly, as did days 26 and 27 and soon Hamilton knew he should be heading back to London, there would be a New Year's Eve party with other drivers at Russell's house and he had been invited. An idea popped into his head and soon he was in front of Rosie's house, ringing the bell. The woman's husband answered.

"Lewis! You can come in! The girls are in the kitchen." He cracked a playful smile. "I know who you're after."

"Jam... Mate, I swear..." He cracked a smile too, slapping his shoulder twice before walking quickly to the kitchen.

When he saw the scene, his heart started beating faster. She was dirty with flour as she made cookies with her nephew, her smile was huge and the boy's laughter could be heard from afar. Rosie was holding her daughter as she turned up the music. The Londoner was having her movie moment, the soft laughter, the wonderful family and a man who loved her watching from afar.

"Oi! Am I interrupting something?" The dark-skinned man said, walking slowly.

"You can come in!" Rosie said with a smile, as the other woman tried to clean herself up.

"Can we talk?" He said as he got close to the younger woman; she removed her apron and they walked out into the yard through the kitchen door, the tension in her could be seen from afar, so he held both of her hands, standing very close to her. "Calm down, it's nothing bad."

"I always hope for the worst."

"With me, it's always for the best." They both smiled before he took a deep breath and looked at her. "I'm going back to London tomorrow, I need to sort some things out.... But that's beside the point. I've been invited to a New Year's Eve party by my teammate and I was wondering if you wanted to go as my date."

"Oh. Lewis, that's... I don't know if I have the right clothes for the occasion!" She laughed softly, placing her hand on his cheek. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure! I want to introduce you to people who will love you, who will treat you nicely and see that you deserve nothing but the best." He put his hands around her waist. "And don't worry about clothes that I can manage."

"I'd love to go with you." The woman kissed his cheek. "I'd have to talk to Rosie, though. But I don't think she'd be mad, she's the best and as soon as she can, she's going to spend a weekend in London with me."

"I can't wait to see you in a gala dress. You’ll look so lush." He murmured, bringing his face closer with hers. It was an automatic movement, like muscle memory, their noses already brushing against each other from their faces being so close. A little more and they'd be with their lips together, however a loud Rosie saying that the cookies would burn broke the mood, making them both laugh before heading back inside.

Hamilton was invited to spend the day at their house, which he didn't refuse as he felt very comfortable with his family. The two's passionate glances could be seen from afar by Rosie and James, who were smiling, as if they were playing cupid. They might have spent the whole day on the outskirts of the house, without revisiting other places in the town or buying different things at the local market, but for them, they didn't have to, because each other's company was already enough.

When Hamilton left, the designer was cornered by her cousin and her husband - who were certainly far more invested in everything than she was.

"You guys spent all day together and no kiss? Nothing?" Rosie said in exasperation.

"It's just that we spent the whole day with you guys."

"You could have disappeared and we wouldn't have given a shit, you're a couple in love!" Exclaimed James.

"We're not a couple."

"Yet."

She laughed low, running her hand over her face. "Anyway... I'm leaving tomorrow." She could see the sadness in their gaze. "I'm going back with Lewis, he invited me to a dinner party with his friends. We're spending the new year together." Their reaction was squealing and hugging the girl.

"Then we'll pack your bag and tomorrow morning you'll be waiting for him and you can be at peace together in London. Without horrible people and privacy." The older woman put her hands

on her cousin's shoulders, pushing her up to her room.

…

December 31, 2022. Last day of the year. She was sitting on the floor, the day started badly, she managed to break a plate when she went to make breakfast, cutting her palm. Then the shower wasn't getting hot, then the heel she had separated to wear that night, broke just as she decided to test it. And to make matters worse, it had been 5 years since she had drunk herself to the point where she couldn't stand up and tried to take her own life. Her head was leaning against the bed, mobile phone in hand, part of her wanted to cancel tonight's plans and hide under the covers until the first of next year. Slowly she dialled the pilot's number, listening to the sound of the call until he answered.

“Hey, love. Alright?”

“No. Everything went wrong.” She murmured.

He was going out with his fellow driver friends, they really needed someone to pick their outfits for tonight, however, when he heard her voice, so low and weepy, he walked from them to a quieter place.

“What happened?”

“I cut my hand, my shower stopped working, the heel I was going to wear tonight also broke and to top it all off, today is not a day with very good memories…”

“Hey… This must be very frustrating.” He said in a soft tone.

“It is.” She sobbed, passing a hand in her face to wipe the tears away.

“Okay, how about… I can get a new shoe for you and I can also pick you up… So you’ll get ready with me for the party.”

“That sounds good… I live close to Green Park station.”

“I’m at Picadilly… Pretty close, so as soon as we finish here, I’ll pick you up. Okay, love?”

“Okay.” She smiled.

“Because they don't have any fashion sense.” They chuckled together before hanging up.

She took a deep breath before getting up again, looking at herself in the mirror, even if she was going to go and get ready at Lewis' house, she couldn't look like that. Slowly, she packed her make-up and an extra outfit into a backpack, then put on a nicer outfit; she also washed her face and put on some perfume - it didn't matter if she was going to shower later and would have to reapply, what mattered was to be smelling good for him. He asked if she could go to the shop he was in. He wanted to know if the heel would fit her, so he walked there. As that boutique catered to more famous people, everything was more discreet and safe, no one could see from the outside what was going on inside, so neither of them would have to worry about people snooping in their lives.

She walked in and was impressed at how beautiful the place was, even feeling underdressed there. Hamilton walked over to her and greeted her with a hug, leaving a kiss on her cheek. He led her over to where some of his friends were, introducing her to the others, before getting straight to the point about which shoe she thought was the best. They took a while to choose which one would be ideal, but they managed to agree on a model.

When they arrived at his mansion, the man took her directly to the large bathroom of his master bedroom, leaving her free to shower and get ready while he went to his wardrobe, which also had a bathroom.

Later, when he was ready, he went to where she was, getting jaw dropped to see her, the purple dress had been perfect on her body, her hair was loose and she wore the jewels that he had separated especially for her. Noticing that he was watching her, she cracked a silly smile, walking over to him and putting her arms around his neck, thanking him for everything and that she had no words to say how amazing he was, from welcoming her to being willing to introduce his friends to her. They drove off with his driver, so the journey was quiet to George Russell's mansion.

As she entered, she felt the distinctive atmosphere of the place, people had no idea who she was - and that made her so relieved. During the first few hours, she was introduced to his friends, made short conversations and took a few sips of water. She was more focused on how he introduced her, as his partner and also said how amazing her work was. When he reached his friends, now mostly with their respective girlfriends, she felt calmer, seeing other women also taking the same seat she was in. The girls joined in and the bomb of questions - completely respectful, began.

"Where did you two meet?"

"What's he like?"

"He is the one who fell in love first?

The personal questions were answered, but every time it got into the relationship thing, she just said they were taking it slow, taking their time.

Meanwhile, Hamilton was being questioned by his friends - and even Toto had entered the conversation. They were already more playful, wanting to know more spicy aspects. The driver laughed at the haste they were in to find out - besides having Sebastian Vettel with a 'where did I go wrong?' expression, which earned even more laughs.

"We haven't even kissed yet." The older man confessed.

Even more questions surfaced.

"We haven't had a moment together... That's all. I want to take things the right way, she deserves only the best from me."

"And that's how you win a woman, boys." Vettel added and the group burst into laughter.

It was almost midnight, everyone with glasses of champagne except her, at first Lewis hadn't noticed, but the moment he saw it, he handed his own over and was ready to look for another.

"I don't drink, Lew." She said close to his ear.

"Sorry." He took the cup back.

"Five years. Today." The pilot turned his face close to hers, surprised.

"Wow…"

"Actually, it's January first, but I prefer to count it as today."

Then he quickly left his cup with a waiter, putting his hands around her waist, leaving a kiss on her shoulder. The action left her confused, it was okay in case he wanted to drink, it wasn't his problem.

"I'm not going to drink. I want to be able to enjoy your kiss."

Before she could answer, the countdown was on.

5

4

3

2

1

Happy New Year!

She didn't wait for him to speak or do anything, she just pulled her body against his, bringing their lips together in a passionate kiss, passing her tongue into his lips until he opened his mouth to reciprocate it properly, letting their tongues move together in a rhythm. His hands went to her waist, caressing the spot and pulling her even closer. The kiss ended with little pecks and goofy smiles.

“I waited so long for this.” He murmured against her ear.

“Me too…”

They ended up calling for an early night, saying they were too tired and she had to work the next day - it was a lie, she would only be back on January 2nd. Soon they were laying in bed, cuddling.

“I’m proud of you.” She looked at him, a bit confused. “Five years is a long time.”

“Thanks…”

“There’s something else?”

“What?”

“About it. You can tell me, or not, only if you feel comfortable.”

“So…” She sighed, sitting on the bed. “I was an alcoholic, and it was getting worse, my family… Didn’t care, except for Rosie. I’ve lost my job, my partner and was losing my flat. Let’s say that at the end of 2017 was horrible for me. And with my drunk mind… I thought it would be better if I wasn’t around anymore.” He sat up, putting both of his hands on her face, looking the most worried she had ever seen. “After that… I decided to get clean, mostly because of Rosie, she said that I should give life a chance and that everyone who did bad for me would get their consequences. Then I went to rehab, started studying what I loved, made goals. It was hard, still it is… There were some days that I just wanted a sip, but I knew I shouldn’t, so I resorted to other coping mechanisms and they weren’t healthy, at all.” She lifted the shirt he gave her to wear, showing her inner thighs. “But I’m also clean… Almost two years. I really put my life back together. Not that I don’t have bad days or sometimes things may trigger me… Mostly, I’m fine, on my meds, clean and sober.” She didn't notice when tears started to fall, nor when he was hugging her, stroking her hair and leaving light kisses on her face. Her eyes closed, enjoying his show of affection.

"I'm proud of you, for the amazing woman you've become and that you've managed to get back on your feet." He kissed her forehead, before placing a quick kiss on her lips. "You're amazing and I'm going to give you the world, if it's possible, I'll go to the moon and back to show you how amazing I think you are."

"I... I'm completely in love with you." She admitted, surrendering to the embrace and causing them to fall onto the bed. The woman ran her hands through his tresses, soon beginning to trace the tattoos she could reach, as she watched his smile grow wider and wider. The pilot's hands hugged his waist, caressing the spot. "And I hope you know that I'm going to do everything I can to be by your side. Every race I can go to, I'll be there, if not I'll be here, watching on TV. Regardless of whether you win or lose, I will always be with open arms and welcome you with kisses." She left several kisses along his bare collarbone. "Because life isn't just about winning, it's about the journey."

"I really want you to meet the rest of my family." He murmurs. "They will love you."

"And you need to meet my friends." She laughed, starting a kiss.

This time, their lips were more desperate for each other's touch, like it was urgent, like the only purpose of life was to have this passionate kiss. Their tongues were moving in a unique rhythm as his hands roamed her back and she held his shoulders tightly. Hamilton's touches became lower and lower, reaching down to her thighs, where he touched them tenderly, as if they were fleeting and he wanted to remember that sensation forever.

Her kisses descended to his neck, which he responded with a low moan, grabbing the other's waist, pressing against his body. Her legs were on the side of his body, pinning him against the mattress.

"Baby... If we keep this up, I swear... I don't know if I'll hold on." He pulled her face so they could look at each other. "I don't want to push you into anything, I want it to be the best way possible."

"Okay. I agree." She cracked a smile, getting off his lap and cuddling up next to him. She left small kisses on his chest, before rubbing her face against his body.

"What?"

"Thank you. For thinking of me above sex."

"Always. You're my Christmas miracle."

"Damn it, Lewis!" She started laughing uncontrollably. "I still hate Christmas you know, don't you? You just showed me that I don't have to hate that town as much as I do, even if the people are awful."

"But..." He couldn't stop laughing either. "Okay, that was pretty dumb."

"But at least... It was you being my arse."

They continued to laugh for a few more minutes, until tiredness hit and they fell asleep like that, hugging each other so tightly as they were afraid of losing the other in the middle of the night.

Before Valentine's Day even came, he was already posting pictures of her, with declarations of love, it didn't matter to anyone why they were together and who she was. They were them and no one had the power to intervene in their little bubble of happiness. At the beginning of the season, he took her to her first race, where she met more people from his world and was even more in awe of how amazing he was. It seemed like every day she was impressed with new parts of him, he was more like a little box of good surprises.

"I never thought I'd be here, in this position, watching a race and cheering for my boyfriend, but... Lewis changed me. And I'm very grateful for that." She commented to Angela - who approved of the relationship before they even had their first kiss, not least because she loved that her best friend was happy.

"You've changed him too. For the better." Her words caused the designer to fill her eyes with tears. The pilot was ready to put on his helmet and go to his car, but he stopped to give her a kiss, yet he found her all weepy.

"What happened, honey?"

"Blame her." She said with a smile, pointing at Angela. "She said some nice words to me."

He giggled, leaving a kiss on the girl's lips, before putting on his helmet.

"I believe in you." She murmured before he got into the car.

[doberbutts]

Hi, I've been following for a while and have seen a lot of your posts that mention systemic barriers that transmascs face, among them being blocked from reproductive health care due to their documentation being filed as male. This concerned me a lot, so when I spoke to someone at my trans healthcare clinic recently to obtain assistance with legal name & gender change, I brought it up as a reason I was considering a change from F to N instead of F to M.

The case worker I spoke to told me that for pretty much all the major insurance companies now, the systems have been updated with codes to allow providers to flag a patient's file as essentially "this person has a uterus and needs associated care." Which enables them to access the reproductive care they need regardless of their gender marker. He specifically said that there can be cases of human obstruction, where the insurance representative/their manager decides to cause problems and block access, but the electronic system itself is no longer a barrier.

Further, for incidents where it's a person being bigoted, there are legal protections (on the federal level, according to my case worker) that allow the clinic to essentially threaten the insurance company into behaving itself, using the assistance of local legal aid orgs.

Obviously in certain states those legal protections may be compromised, and if someone doesn't have access to a clinic that will go to bat for them OR the legal aid needed to follow through, that would still be a barrier. But it's not absolute in all places.

So since it was a concern for me in my transition decision making, I figure it could be for someone else too - and I wanted to ask if you could possibly post this so other people could see it. That way, if someone else has seen those posts about reproductive healthcare access, they don't assume that they would be barred from legal transition on that basis. I don't want to undermine the completely valid points of the original posts with a "WELL ACTUALLY this doesn't happen everywhere" reply, and I also feel it's important for other transmascs seeking legal transition to have access to the same information I do - knowledge is power. My own blog has negligible reach, or I would simply post this myself.

If you don't feel comfortable with that, though, I completely understand. Thank you for your time.

See, you say that, but then when talking to my endo about this exact topic, she told me she had a couple people (both MtF and FtM) who were stuck in this exact legal and insurance loophole. I am in a sanctuary state going to one of the best gender clinics within my sanctuary state. So... no, I really don't trust it.

[medicalinjury]

The legal framework concerning medical negligence in Australia revolves around the concept of duty of care, establishing the standards that healthcare professionals must adhere to in fulfilling their responsibilities towards patients. This framework significantly shapes healthcare practices, influencing the decisions and conduct of medical practitioners throughout the country.

[svtdarlingbby]

Carried Away - DinoxIdol!Reader

pairing: Dino x reader genre: fluff warnings: minor injury word count: 2,336

It was a fateful day in the dance studio. Your group was preparing for their comeback and although you had practiced the choreography for your new song, you personally needed more practice. It wasn't that you were a bad dancer by any means; you just found that practicing the choreography alone helps you better memorize the moves.

Just as you were beginning the vibe with the song, you hear a knock at the door. Typical. This was a huge building and there were so many idols working here. It's not surprising that someone else would need to use the dance studio at the same time as yourself.

Catching your breath, you made your way to unlock and open the door to be met with one of the Seventeen members.

Chan was it?

He lets out a quick "Thanks" as he made his way in.

"You're welcome" you reply.

Just as you pivoted back to the space where you previously were dancing, your passive thoughts are suddenly interrupted.

"WATCH OUT! YOUR SHOELACES ARE-"

Suddenly you were met face to face with the hardwood floor of the dance studio as your body, especially your knee, collided against the unforgiving studio floor.

"Ouch..." you immediately let out after the painful thud against the floor.

"Are you okay??" asked Chan as he immediately came over and helped you up as he sat down next to you with concern adorning his features.

The searing pain began to radiate throughout your left knee as you held back tears. Nonetheless, you muttered an "I think so" as you began to try to stand up. This proved to be a horrible choice as your left leg gave out due to the pain.

"Don't stand on it. May I take a look?" asked Chan as he noticed how red your knee was becoming.

At that point you were in so much pain you might as well have accepted Chan's help. In hindsight, it was probably a good thing that someone else was present in the dance studio during your accident. It would be better than writhing in pain alone. At the same time though, you didn't want to trouble someone you barely knew, especially since the whole incident was caused by your negligence.

"Yes, I guess so," you muttered, avoiding his gaze as he examined your knee.

"It looks like a bump is already forming, but it's kind of concerning that you can't even walk on it. Does it hurt if I touch it?" he asked, barely brushing his finger on your knee.

"OWW! YES!" you reacted immediately as you retracted your knee away from him.

"Oh my gosh, sorry!" Chan apologized with sincere regret written all over his face, "But I really think you should get this checked out immediately at the clinic. Trust me, ignoring injuries like this is never a good idea."

"Yeah you're right. Thank you Chan," you say as you attempt to make your way out of the dance studio to the clinic. Needless to say, you fail immediately as your leg gives out once again.

"Whoa, watch out. I can help you get to the clinic. Seriously it's no trouble- wait sorry. What's your name?" he asked with a chuckle.

Though your leg was burning in pain, you couldn't help but to smile at his question. "Y/N. And yes, I would really appreciate your help Chan but you really don't have to!"

"Ah yes, Y/N! And seriously, it's no trouble. You can barely walk haha, I'll help you get there. I don't mind," he said as he stood up and stretched his hand outward to you. Though you were in pain and embarrassed, this was the best help you could get. How could you deny him? He's willing to help you, who's practically a stranger who happens to operate in the same building and company. Grasping his chiseled hand into yours, Chan carefully pulled you up to stand next to him. Things sorta got awkward as you both realized how close you'd have to be to one another for Chan to escort you safely.

"So erm, are you okay hopping?" asked Chan somewhat shyly. "Wait that was rude! Do you care if I carry you? Or do you just want to use me like a crutch?" Chan realized how awkward he was making this situation but at the same time he wanted to be respectful. He hardly knew you, and carrying someone moments after first meeting will be awkward even if it's an emergency.

Those feelings were also being reciprocated by yourself. A guy you just met carrying you throughout the HYBE building??? Yeah, everything should be private and all but still, suspicions would be raised. Although being carried sounds like the most painless option, you knew that you wanted to maintain your reputation.

"It's okay Chan, I'll just hold onto you and attempt to hop my way down to the clinic" you replied, looking at the ground.

"Alright, cool," agreed Chan as he allowed your arm to wrap around his shoulder so you could be supported as you two made your way to the elevators.

The sound of your shoes echoing the hallways made up for the awkward silence brought on by your proximity to one another. As much as you tried to focus on hopping efficiently toward the elevators, you still felt your heart race and your face heat up regarding your predicament. Here you are, arm around the Lee Chan of Seventeen, bobbing around awkwardly as you feel his grip on your wrist tighten to stabilize you. This was not what you had in mind when you decided to practice dancing on your own.

You two finally made it to the elevators, and you were hoping and praying no one would be in the elevator when it came down to your floor. After what seemed like ages, the elevator came down and lo and behold, the elevator doors opened up to none other than Yoon Jeonghan and Kwon Soonyoung. Chan mentally cursed to himself. Why, out of everyone, did God send down the two members who would tease him relentlessly for having an unsuspecting member from another group wrapped around him.

"Chan! Hey! What's up!" yelled Soonyoung as Chan shot him an annoyed look. Apparently the two didn't get the hint.

Avoiding eye contact with his group mates, Chan simply replied, "Y/N needed help going the the clinic."

The tension in that thirty second elevator ride was suffocating. Jeonghan and Soonyoung simply nodded, but from the corner of your eye you and Chan could see the two exchanging knowing glances at one another. Chan immediately knew they were going to bug him about this incident later.

Once you all arrived to the floor of the clinic, Jeonghan let out a teasing "Bye Bye" to Chan and nicely enough, well wishes for you.

"Feel better soon Y/N!"

"Thank you," you replied as you hobbled out of the elevator holding onto Chan for dear life. You noticed how tense Chan suddenly appeared; did you embarrass him in front of his members?

Just as doubts began to circulate within your head, Chan suddenly began to speak. "Man, those guys are pretty annoying."

"Is that so?" you didn't really know how to reply.

"Yeah, I just know they're gonna ask a lot of questions to me. Don't worry though, helping someone like you is more important," he chuckled and squeezed your wrist tenderly, which suddenly made you feel more at ease with him. Certainly the atmosphere became less awkward.

"Aw, thanks Chan. And it's okay. If any of my group members were in that elevator I would not hear the end of it," you laughed as you thought of the group members you loved so dearly; though they were a pain in the butt sometimes.

The small talk you two shared made up for the time it took to reach the clinic.

"Well, here we are," said Chan as he guided you to the nearest chair for you to sit down in.

Thankfully a nurse was nearby and promptly took notice of you. She took your information before she began her analysis.

"So Y/N, I take it that you may have suffered a leg injury of some sort?" she asked as she finished washing her hands.

"Yeah, funny story. I fell onto the ground because my shoelaces were untied," you began with a chuckle, "Thankfully Chan here was in the room and made sure I was okay and encouraged me to come to the clinic."

"Well Chan was certainly right! We don't want to neglect an injury like this!" said the nurse as Chan shyly looked away, though you could see the smile he was trying to hide.

The nurse began to examine your knee, and she took notice of the way you winced when her finger brushed the bump that was beginning to form. She did also note the discoloration too. The nurse wrapped up your knee in a knee brace and left the room to go grab some crutches and extra painkillers since she determined that it was just a mild strain accompanied with a painful bruise. You were surprised that Chan stayed this long, but you appreciated having someone in the room with you since this was your first major-ish injury as an idol.

"Hey Chan, I think I'll be okay. Thank you for taking me here! But I don't wanna take away from your dance time," you said.

"It's no problem Y/N, I just wanna make sure you get all cleared! I'm glad nothing is broken, seriously" he replied with a smile. Chan did really want to make sure you were okay. He liked being around you. Sure you were a little shy at first, but you're good company and honestly he finds you pretty sweet and nice. He'll also do anything right now to avoid Jeonghan and Soonyoung.

His response made you a little flustered but thankfully the nurse came back with crutches just in time.

"Now Y/N, stay off of this leg for about a week and take plenty of rest. I've notified your manager too, so don't worry about all the logistics and focus on resting," she said as she handed you the crutches. As she turned around to find any other paperwork, she was met with a surprise when she realized Chan was still there.

"Oh my! Chan! You haven't left?" she asked dramatically causing you and Chan to laugh.

"No ma'am. Just wanted to make sure Y/N here was alright!" he replied with his signature smile.

"Chivalry is not dead! Y/N, he's a keeper!" she said not so subtly causing you to feel flustered all over again. Chan also felt himself get butterflies over the nurse's comment.

"OH no it's not what it looks like!" you tried to clear up the situation but the nurse gave you a knowing look as she dismissed the both of you.

You and Chan awkwardly left the clinic but thankfully Chan broke the silence with his laughter.

"That nurse is something," he laughed, making you feel at ease once again.

"I'm never going to forget this visit," you chuckled as you hobbled alongside Chan with your crutches.

"Let's go to the elevators. What floor is your dorm on?" he asked, slowing his pace so you could keep up.

"I'm on floor 12," you replied, "I mean, the stairs are kind of useless at this point for me!"

"Haha, as long as you listen to the nurse you'll be back on your feet in no time. Everything would be perfect," chuckled Chan as he pressed the elevator button.

Well, if you did truly listen to all of the advice the nurse gave you, you'd end up being with Chan. Oh my god, he couldn't have meant it like that, could he? No, I'm sure he just brushed off that comment of her's.

"Haha yeah," was all you really could reply.

Thankfully this time the elevator was empty as Chan pressed the 12 button for you as well as the button to the dance studio where you two initially found yourselves. It was silent the whole ride but it was a comfortable silence since neither of you were forcing conversation. Once you go to your floor, Chan walked you to your dorm.

"Well, I guess this is where we part," said Chan as you two stood in front of your door.

"I guess so. Chan, seriously, I cannot thank you enough. You didn't have to help me this much, but I really appreciate it," you told him genuinely.

"It's no problem at all Y/N. I know how important dancing would be to someone like you and the faster you're treated the quicker you can come back to dancing," he said with a smile as he began to walk back.

"Thank you Chan, and one more thing?" you asked as you finished unlocking your door.

"What's that Y/N?" asked Chan stopping in his tracks.

As cheesy as it sounds, you tried your best to open up your arms despite being on crutches to give your savior a hug. Honestly, it was so endearing as Chan immediately let himself fall into your arms, while making sure you were still stable of course. Maybe you were exaggerating, but Chan's hug was the nicest hug you've ever received.

"Take care," he smiled as the two of you broke away.

Chan began to walk down the hall. Yes his members are gonna be concerned why he was gone for so long but that can wait. And he knew Jeonghan and Soonyoung will tease the heck out of him once he returns. But honestly, you were so worth it. And he knew he wouldn't get another chance like this. Just as you were about to go into your room, you heard Chan again.

"And one more thing?" asked Chan with a teasing smile.

"Yes Chan?" you playfully asked.

"Can I get your number?"

Should I make a part 2?