#clean windows without lint

[windowcleankits]

7 Tips for Cleaning Windows Without Lint or Fibers:

#cleanwindowswithoutleavinglint #cleanwindowswithoutstreaks #howtocleanwindows #windowcleaningtips #cleaningwindows

[sweetenerobert]

toy story

8.1k | action figure!joel miller x male reader

summary: contemplating throwing out your favorite toy, he comes to life and makes your last night before you leave for college memorable

warnings: MDNI 18+, agalmatophilia, strong language, slight possessive joel, childhood friends to lovers (if you squint) no mention of age besides reader leaving for college, l-word drops, pet names (mostly doll and baby), spanking, dirty talking joel, no description of reader, but joel lifts you (1), oral (m!giving/m!receiving) rimming, spit as lube, unprotected p in a, creampie,

inspired by this post , also huge thanks to @strang3lov3 new tattoo for this fucking idea, i love you so much and thank you for letting me rant to you about this idea that been in my drafts for FUCKING MONTHS

thanks to @minispidey for beta, love you <333

dividers by @saradika-graphics

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read it on a03 as well

I’VE MISSED YOU GUYS!! SOOO MUCH!!

Moonlight piercing through the cotton curtains of your childhood bedroom, dust dancing through the luminescent shards from your window. Two boxes stacked on each other in the corner of your room, your closet’s life ripped away from the clothes once hung in the small confined space. 

Wiping the sweat that littered your forehead as you huffed a breath, you lay down on the small circular rug that riddled the floor, staring at the ceiling light. You were getting ready to leave for college, and packing up your life seemed more stressful than lifting weights off your shoulders. 

Constant choices about what to throw away or bring with you kept swimming in your brain, and overthinking two simple decisions kept making your head spin, mostly ending with you sitting silently thinking about your answer. This wasn’t one of those situations; you had just finished packing and felt like you deserved a break.

Alone in your childhood home while your parents had picked up late shifts and your siblings were out, the silence was deafening, but you preferred the quiet. It gave you time to process everything. Seeing the stars tapped onto your ceiling made you smirk as you glanced around your bare room.

Eyes catching an object underneath the bed, you turned your body to understand the object better. It was your old lumberjack action figure when you were a kid; it must’ve fallen off the shelf over your window. You don’t remember if it came with a name or you made it up, but you called him Joel. 

That name stuck with you until now, even when you were a kid, when you introduced Joel to your friends as they commented on it. Being a “weird name,” you didn’t care; you loved the name. 

Attempting to grab him from the bed, you realize that it would be easier to grab Joel from your bed. You were quickly climbing up on your bed and scrambling to the side, quickly sliding your hand down the crack of the wall and your bed. Tips of your fingers grazing the fake axe on the back of the action figure, biting your lip as your nail pulls the toy closer towards the wall, retracting your head a few feet up as you see it closer to the wall.

The action figure is in your grasp, sliding your knuckles up on the cold wall while your palm touches the cotton sheets wrapped around your mattress. The toy is now in your hand, and you notice how it’s looked the same after all the years. A couple of tiny patches of color are missing from his plastic hair, and his face and plastic beard stay the same. Joel’s clothes are dusty, balls of lint cover his pants and shirt, and his boots are dustier than anything. You quickly blow a puff of air, trying to clean him off the best you can.

“Hey, Joel. How ya been?’ 

Did I use to talk to this thing? Man, I was a weird kid. 

Joel was your therapist before you even knew what therapy was — telling him about how you finally could spell Wednesday without misspelling it, How you passed each spelling/vocabulary test, and how the boys at school were bullying you. Joel always listened to you; he was your toy, and he didn’t care as long as he was there to protect you – metaphorically.

Loving Joel was easy—he was your first crush—but trying to explain that to a toy was difficult. Bringing Joel with you to live in your college dorm seemed like a hard decision. Glancing at the tiny trash can next to your bed, you glance back at Joel and discard him in the trash bin. 

Wiping your hands on your pants, you looked at the bags and boxes that had cluttered the corner of your room and huffed a breath in annoyance as you decided it would be wise to have your life packed away downstairs.

It didn’t take you long to realize how much you hated your fucking stairs. You were leaning on the top of the stairs – on the handrail, catching your breath. Your bedroom was in your field of view; you would’ve crawled into your room if your knees hadn’t creaked with each movement. 

One of the main things you wouldn’t miss about your house would be the stairs that killed you slowly with each trip up and down the wooden stairwell. 

Slowly getting up from the floor, your feet trudged towards your bedroom door. You were pushing the gateway of your bedroom, earning a creak from its hinges. Your eyes glanced down towards the dark chocolate wood floor with each step into your room. “Finally, I’m ready to lay down in my –” You started to pick your head up, glancing at the figure sitting on your night, playing with a pink eraser he must’ve found in the trash bin.

“– bed.”

"Doll, what's up with you throwin' me away?"

W-what? That one question kept flying around in your head. Not, who is this? Not, what is happening? Just a simple question: What kept spinning around your head?

In the back of your mind, you knew who it was sitting in front of you. It wasn’t a dream, not your imagination; it was real life. Your action figure — your lumberjack, Joel in the flesh? 

He looked real, too real. His hair's curls looked fluffy, and his skin's wrinkles looked defined. His clothes looked like he’d gotten them from a store, with wrinkles littering his shirt and jeans and his boots rubbing against the wood. Your childhood toy was in front of you, alive and in the flesh.

“Too stunned to speak, doll?” 

Shaking your head from the thoughts swimming around you, you look at the male before you. “What?”

“Got my answer. Can’t believe I rendered my doll speechless.”

Joel’s build shocked you as he stood up from his position; his shoulders were broad, his biceps bulging from his flannel – you knew he rolled his sleeves up. Vein’s threatening to burst from his arms and hands. Your former action figure who walked in front of you felt menacing, like his aura made you cower in fear, but instead of fear, it was astonishment. That something you wished for years ago finally came true.

“How is this possible? How are you real?” You quivered. 

“The better question better be, “Why would I throw out such a precious toy?”

“Huh?”

“C’mon, doll, y’think I’m stupid or somethin’; I knew y’threw me out. Half m’foot was in the trash can when I started growing.” 

The answer was plain and simple: you didn’t want to bring him with you to college or leave him to give to someone else, so you thought just about getting rid of him would be. Clearly, Joel’s surprise appearance made things more complicated than they should. “I didn’t throw you out,” You quickly spat out. “You fell in there by accident.”

Joel’s tall figure stood tall in front of you, his once plastic hand – now turned flesh and genuine, his thumb slowly tracing your bottom lip. Your body was shuddering against his touch. “Y’know your body betrays you, sweetheart.”

“Just be honest; it doesn't hurt me, jus’ your pride.”

“J-Joel, listen —”

“Ah, now you know I exist; you were treating me like some hallucination,” Joel announced, backing up, sticking his thumb in the waistband of his jeans. 

“You’re aware that this could very well be a hallucination,” You shrugged.

“Slap yourself, then.” 

“Huh?” 

“Slap. Yourself. In. The face. Then.” Joel enunciated. 

“N-No! I’m not going to do that!” You exclaimed. 

“Okay, fine, then. You’ll never know if this is a hallucination then.” 

Groaning, you quickly connected your palm against your cheek, the skin on your palm and face stink earning a wince that you suck from your teeth.”Happy, now?”

“Blessed. I’m pretty sure you have many questions, which aren’t important, because we need to figger out why you threw me out?”

“I told you, I didn’t–”

“Doll, I’m not stupid. I saw you put me in there, now don’t bullshit me.”

The skin on your palm and cheek had been itchy to the point you wanted to scratch your palm and face simultaneously, resulting in you rubbing your knuckles on your face. But you didn’t even want to answer Joel—your childhood toy. Hurting your friend's feelings was something you never wanted to do; imagine how Joel would feel knowing the boy who had played with him since he was a kid didn’t want to take him to college with him.

But it was something that you had to say, something that you would dread telling anyone you love.

Deciding to rip the band-aid faster than slow, you take a breath, look at Joel’s once painted-on brown eyes, and see a soul behind his real-like eyes. “I didn’t want to take you to college with me, and giving you away seemed way too hard even to think about. So I threw you away.”

Joel looked shocked by your confession. He thought he was ready to hear what you had to say, but Joel wasn’t; he was more perplexed than anything. Moving from where he stood before you, he stumbles on the mattress and sits down to collect his thoughts. Joel’s head hangs as you sit down next to him. It was reminiscent of when you were younger and would watch movies in your living room, having Joel sit next to you while you imagined him laughing or getting mad at a character like you were.

For once, the silence in the room was deafening, and you didn’t like it; you didn’t know what Joel would say, which terrified you.

“Joel? Are you okay?”

Joel nodded. “Yeah,” He snuffled. “Was just thinkin’ bout somethin’.”

“What was it?’

“Joel, when I’m older, I’m taking you everywhere with me, no matter what. You're going to be with me during college, and even when I get the big boy job like my daddy does, you’ll always be there.”

The action figure you played with your whole childhood quoted what you told him in those peak years of being a kid and had nothing to worry about.

“I said that, I'm guessing?”

Joel nods. “You were always a happy kid, no matter what happened, always smiling.” You chuckle at Joel’s statement. It made a smile appear as you remembered that he was always there with you. But, you had to face the fact that you weren't a kid anymore; those promises you made to a toy — a mere plaything- weren't something you thought about as a hormonal teenager. 

Shaking your head, you snap your head at Joel. “Joel, I was a kid back then. I didn't know that growing up would be so different than what I thought.”

“I- I can't be that same kid again. I wish I could trust me, I wish I could, but I can't.”

“It’s a shame,” Joel starts. “I would’ve loved t’see you grow up.”

“I mean, you technically did, right?”

Joel chuckles, “Yeah. Yeah, I did.” 

The cicadas appeared to disrupt the silence in the room when you didn't know what to say to Joel. You hated breaking your best friend’s heart, but being honest was something Joel wanted other than being lied to. “Do you want a hug?” 

“I would love that,” Joel’s southern drawl appeared as you wrapped your arms around Joel, and his arms wrapped you around in a bear hug. 

Hugging Joel felt weird but right – a seemingly impossible wish you fulfilled. You begged to be able to hug Joel, have him hold you in his arms, and melt together, being safe in each other’s arms. “M’gonna miss ya when you’re gone,” Joel grumbles against your head. As you hugged Joel, questions began to swim in your mind as you squeezed his waist; it felt like you were hugging an actual human. The way his body resisted against the tight hold on him, his body felt warm against yours. 

“Okay, wait a second,” you announce, releasing yourself from Joel’s grip and standing before him.

“What’s wrong?” Joel asks, resting one hand on his knee and his forearm on the other knee. You watch at the skin around his wrist, and the watch starts to bend as if he were human.

Questions were floating in your head; you didn’t know where to start, but you took a deep breath and opened your mouth to speak. “How did this happen? How are you walking like this?” 

“I’ve always done it, just done it when everyone isn’t home.”

Perplexity rode your face as Joel’s answer made you think about more questions you wanted to spit out. “So, you’ve always been able to walk around and be so human-like?”

“Yeppers.”

“So, you heard everything?”

Joel nods.

“Everything?” 

“If you’re referring to the times I’ve heard and seen you jerk off and get fucked in here, then yes, everything,” Joel mocked. 

Heat rose to your face. Joel had seen everything, the most vulnerable parts of your body. Things that you wouldn’t admit to if your family asked about it.  “Even when–” 

“Not when you were a kid, I’gave you your privacy. Scout’s honor.”

“But, you’re not a scout but a lumberjack.” 

Joel shrugs. “You’re point?”

“My point is–” You exhale a breath as a hand slides down your face. “If ya wonderin’ of anythin’ sex-related–” Joel interjected.

One question swam around your mind in that topic Joel mentioned. “Can you fuck?” You question, crossing your arms. Joel’s chuckle sent chills picking at your “tough-guy” demeanor. That nervous feeling rose, making you worried about his answer. “If I tell you the truth, will you mind?”

Reflexically shaking your head, you waited for Joel’s answer. “Yes, doll. I can.” Without thinking, you asked Joel. “How?” Joel answered by pointing at you. “You’ve done some pretty interesting things, doll.” 

Moving your head as you eye roll at the “man” before you. “I’m scared to ask, but–”

“You’re interested if I had fucked anythin’?” 

“Honestly? Yeah.” You don’t know how to feel about Joel’s confession. On the one hand, you were intrigued by what Joel had done; on the other hand, it made you feel like you were stepping into a zone you weren’t comfortable with entering. “Wow, my old toy, fucking other toys? I’m guessing.” 

Joel chuckles. “Y’know your sister’s Barbie doll? Fucked her, Ken watched.”

A grimace appeared on your face as Joel's sudden statement made you feel like the cold rushed in from your bedroom. “Wow,” you started. “Wait, Barbie and Ken can become real, like you?” Joel nodded at your answer.

“Huh, well. You learn something new every day.” 

“Blame yourself, doll. I learned everything from you.”

Confusion rode your face, trying to act innocent like you had no reason behind Joel’s actions. “What do you mean?” You shrug.

Joel stands up, his hands draped by the stitched pockets of his jeans, his boots slowly connecting with the hardwood floors, causing you to walk backward at your leisurely pace. You and Joel were working in tandem—with each step he took, you took a step back. You felt slightly intimidated. In the back of your head, you never thought you would feel unnerved by a toy—a toy you never would’ve expected to come to life. 

That rush of cold flew through your back when you connected with the side of your closet, bringing your hands to the wall; that cold sensation connected with your hand. Joel’s looming figure had been present before you, his hand outstretched beside your head. Joel slowly moves his head toward your head; you feel his warm breath against you, causing your spine to chill — mentally blaming the wall. 

“C’mon, doll. You know exactly what I mean.” Joel’s voice made your breath hitch as you felt his mustache tickle against your neck. “I know what you want, your likes, know what you like to be called,” You feel Joel’s realistic fingers on your chin as he picks your head up to look into his eyes; you watch as he backs up from your ear. 

His soft but calloused hand was on your chin, slowly dragging his hand against the fabric of your shirt as you watched the wrinkles in your shirt flatten under the path his hand was sliding down your torso. You watched as the wrinkles disappeared, only to reaper after Joel’s hand moved from its position. Joel’s hand was slow but not too slow, like a snail’s pace, slow to the point where you felt each goosebump underneath his hand — under your shirt.

Joel’s hand had stopped on your waist, while his other hand was above your head as he leaned closer to your eyes. Bracing for the impact of Joel’s lips on yours, you close your eyes. 

The feeling of plump, soft lips against yours sent shivers traveling down your spine as you felt the grip on your waist was getting tighter — rougher. Your hands travel from the wall into Joel’s soft curls. You wanted Joel in the moment; you craved him — yearned for him. Memories of you dreaming of kissing Joel had finally come true; you didn't expect the kiss to feel so passionate, an end-of-the-world kiss — one that stopped the world from spinning.

The feeling of silk had flown through your fingers as you contorted your hands with Joel’s hair. Joel’s hands slid from your waist onto your ass — squeezing lightly, you gasped against his lips. 

Your heart skipping a beat seemed impossible, but Joel’s kisses begged to differ. Your hands slipped from Joel’s hair onto his face, and you felt his defined jawline and patchy beard; you felt soft but coarse underneath your palms, which was something you couldn’t imagine. Reminiscent of when your fingertips would travel against the painted beard, always wondering what it looked/felt like, at this moment, you can. 

Joel’s big hands leave an imprint on your ass; slowly, his hands start sliding down toward your inner thigh, bending his back closer to you so the connection of your lips doesn't break. “Jump,” Joel grumbles against your lips. You push your feet off the ground as Joel’s strength lifts you, chuckling against his lips, wrapping your legs around Joel’s waist; you feel his hands under your thighs, gripping into you with passion; you think his nails may leave crescent moons into your skin. 

Cold drywall leaves your back as Joel slowly turns you both around so your bed can face your back. With each step, your and Joel’s noses keep bumping into each other as your faces keep moving side to side from your passionate kiss. Joel’s mouth leaves yours as his lips trail down your jawline, lightly sucking. Your hands return to Joel's hair as his lips end on your neck.  

Lips on your neck, sucking, biting, Joel marking you with his lips, your moans kept escaping your lips as your fingers flowed through Joel’s hair like water. “Y’like that, baby?” Joel growled. You hiss through your teeth before answering. “Fuck, yes. I love it, Joel.”

Quickly turning his body, Joel sits on the edge of your bed. Your knees indent your mattress as you feel sitting down. His lips return to yours as Joel wraps his arms against the midsection of your back, melting your bodies together. Your hands make their way from Joel’s head onto his broad shoulders. Thinking the flannel was warming his skin, you wanted to get rid of it. 

Backing slightly away, you slip your hands down his hardened chest; you start to fumble with the first button. Quickly unbuttoning the first one, you were on your way to the next one; Joel took notice of your hands and broke the kiss to look at what you were doing. “What are ya doing, doll?”

“Trying to get this flannel off you,” You grumble, popping the second button off. 

“Lemme help.” 

Joel moves his arms from your waist onto his flannel, smiling at you as you watch him pop the buttons out the loops. You watch as your childhood crush takes off his flannel and throws it over your shoulder, chest hair littering his chest. You slowly bring your hand onto his chest—above where his heart should be — but you don't feel a bump vibrate against your hand. You remember that Joel isn't human, which somewhat shatters your heart. 

Joel notices your saddened eyes; he places his hand over yours and looks deep into your eyes, his brown eyes piercing into your soul. “J’so ya know, I may not have a heart, but my love f’you is more important than anything else in this goddamn world. You're one of the best things that’s ever happened to me.”

“I don't want to live in a world where I don't see your smile every day; it's a reminder t’myself that no matter what, my love for you is the most real thing for me.”

You smirk at Joel’s confession, quickly smashing your lips against his. The tears brimming your tear ducts, trickling down from your eyes, wiping your eyes as you back up and look at Joel. “You are such a softie, you know that?”

“Only for you, sweetheart.” Joel quickly pushed his lips against yours, wrapping his arms around your midsection and moving your arms around his neck. 

Feeling Joel’s smile against your lips, you're quickly surprised when you feel Joel stand up and, in one motion, spin you both around so your back is on your mattress. You can’t help but smile gleefully as he backs up from you — sliding your shirt up and planting kisses trailing from your chest to your navel. His thick fingers grab the waistband of your pants as he slides them down. “Lift your hips, doll.” You do as Joel commands; he slides your pants off your thighs and throws them in the corner where your hamper used to reside, leaving your underwear on, your cock hard and covered by your underwear. 

“Look a’that, y’hard f’me already, doll?” You chuckle at Joel; you gasp as you feel his lips press the tip of your hard-covered cock. With each kiss brought against the tip and the shaft of your cock, it feels like heaven to you, bringing you absolute bliss against your skin. You get your foot against Joel’s shoulder as your other one hangs off the edge of the bed, arching your back in pleasure as Joel’s mouth moves down your thigh. 

Joel looks up at you and smiles as he kisses your leg. Noticing the wet spot appears on your underwear. Pre-cum slowly escaping the slit of your cock. “Let’s get these underwear off you.” You didn't need Joel to tell you to lift your hips reflectively. You lifted your pelvis, and he slid the underwear off you. Your hard throbbing cock slaps against your navel, a line of pre-cum connects with your stomach. “God, you’re s’fuckin’ perfect, baby.” 

Standing up from his position, he softly presses his lips against yours, bringing his hand into the bend of your knee, his other hand holding the side of your face. Joel’s tongue licked your bottom lip, awaiting your mouth to open. Slightly parting your lips, Joel slips his tongue into your mouth, causing you to smile at Joel’s eagerness. 

“How do you feel?” Joel questions against your lips.

“Fan-fuckin-tastic.” You answer, bearing your teeth. “How about I make you feel even fuckin’ better.” Joel’s question came out as a statement, causing you to question his meaning. Without warning, Joel backs up from your face and laps his tongue on the shaft of your cock, making a moan escape from your mouth, sliding his tongue slowly up the head of your cock, moans escaping your mouth. “F-fuck, Joel,” You breathe. 

“Y’like that, baby?” 

You breathe out an answer as Joel starts playing the slit of your cock with his tongue. “Yes.” 

“Makin’ sure that you deserve somethin’. You’re too precious to be mistreated.”

Joel must've heard all the times you would complain to your best friend about how one guy seemed great but lacked something when it came to sex. Joel was showing what you’ve been craving for a guy to reciprocate when you pleasured them, but he wasn't expecting anything back; he was just glad to pleasure his boy first. 

Wrapping his mouth slowly around the tip of your cock, Joel slowly goes down the shaft of your length, causing you to moan and white knuckle your sheets as you throw your head back — arching your back and snapping your eyes shut in pleasure. 

His pace was slow but patient. Joel wanted to make you feel something you rarely experienced — over the moon. Wrapping his hands around the shaft of your cock, his fingers would let go for a moment before wrapping.

Dragging your fingers into Joel’s curls, you slowly push his head down, hoping he could speed up. “Fuck, Joel. Can you go faster, please?”

“I can do ya one better, doll.”

As Joel’s mouth felt warm around your cock, he started to go faster as you gasped in pleasure; you felt Joel’s hand slide from your thigh as he slowly began to tease your hole. The skin of your taint felt sensitive with each stroke of Joel’s finger teasing you; each swipe, each light prodding made your body shiver in anticipation. Your cock has never been in overdrive as much as this — Joel was slowly rising you towards your peak. Your cock twitches in Joel’s mouth showing the throbbing pain that was threatening to shoot out. 

Slowly and agonizing, Joel slides his mouth off your cock, swallowing his spit; Joel wipes the reminder off his lips with the back of his hand, glances at you, and chuckles as Joel strokes your cock. “Y’close, doll?”

“Yes,” You whimper. “So fuckin’ close. It hurts so much. Can I cum yet, Joel?”

A chuckle left his throat, a sly smirk appearing on his face as he stared at you. Joel stops pumping your cock — landing on your stomach, precum leaking from the slit. “Not yet, doll. We haven't had our fun yet.”

Lifting your legs, Joel slides his head down deeper in between your thighs. He laps his tongue against your aching hole; a shaky moan escapes your lips as you hold your legs up so Joel can get better access to your hole. His hands are planted on your inner thighs as he keeps his tongue against your taint. 

Joel’s tongue felt like magic against you, showing you things you’ve never felt before — things you’ve only imagined happening. His tongue sliding up and down, in and out of your hole, made you want to cum by how much Joel was treating you. 

His plump lips planting kisses against your taint made your toes curl — the bones could pop out, your nails digging into the skin of your thighs, your moans escaping from you with each movement of Joel’s lips and tongue was giving you pleasure. 

That sensation of something feeling pushed inside you came rushing in as you let go of one of your thighs, gripped the sheets below you, and threatened to rip them up. You look down at Joel, looking up at you with a smirk on his face; you notice what is being pushed inside you; Joel’s thick middle finger has taken a turn to please you. 

“Y’like that, don’t you, baby?”

“Mhmm,” You whimper, throwing your head back, closing your eyes, and biting your lip. 

“I told ya, I know what you like, basically what you’ve been yearnin’ for.” 

“But, you gotta let me know if it’s too much for you, baby. I can't read minds yet.”

“It’s it too much?” Joel questioned.

You shake your head to deny Joel’s question. “It’s just right, it’s so fuckin’ right,” You grit your teeth. 

Sliding another finger in, Joel’s pace had gone faster. You knew Joel was trying to test your limit; you never knew your limit; you were glad to try to figure it out with someone you trusted. 

“Look at that; your hole wraps around m’fingers; it keeps sucking me in no matter how hard I try to pull out.”

Sudden movements from your hips as you kept raising your hips and bringing them back down. Gritting your teeth, tiny whimpers left through your teeth. Pleasure flowed through your entire body — a new goal you never knew you could reach.

Joel would never admit this, but him being the reason whimpers were leaving your mouth, you squirming because of his fingers and mouth, he was fucking over the moon to be the first person ever to make you feel this way. 

“J-Joel?” You breathed.

“Yeah, doll?”

“Can I please suck your cock?” 

Joel was conflicted by your question; all he wanted to do was make you feel good, he wasn’t expecting anything in return, but he wanted to know what that perfect mouth of yours felt around his cock. 

Slipping his fingers outside your hole, aching for more, Joel smirks at you and opens his mouth to speak. “Yes, you can, doll.” As you sit up, you notice the length that resided in his jeans; your eyes almost pop from their sockets from what you have just seen. You’d never seen anything that big in porn, yes, but never in real life. 

Noticing your astonishment, Joel looked at his jeans and then back up at you. “Is this size good enough, sweetheart?” You nod your head. Sliding your back against the mattress, you slid so your knees hit the wood below you. Watching the eagerness flood Joel’s eyes made you feel that excitement swimming in your stomach. The button of his jeans popped above you, and hearing the zipper going down, you watched as Joel’s cock popped out from its restraints.

Joel’s throbbing cock bounced in front of you, precum leaking from the slit of Joel’s cock. In your eyes, Joel’s cock looked more realistic than plastic. You wouldn’t lie; you were a curious kid; you had removed Joel’s clothes before and only noticed a blob on where his dick was now. The veins traveled up the shaft of his cock, stopping at the mushroom tip of his cock. The happy trail from Joel’s tummy showed up his pubic hair that rested above the shaft of his cock. Your mouth went dry in anticipation. It was the first you had seen a dick this big and thick before and so close to your face. 

“You alright, doll?”

Shooting your eyes up at Joel, you can tell a bit of worry on his face. “Yeah, I-I’m fine. Just never seen a dick this big before,” You admitted. Bending down so his face is in front of you, softly placing his hand against your cheek in reassurance. “We can take it slow if you want to.” You nodded at Joel’s words as he planted his lips against your forehead and stood straight. Dragging Joel’s jeans down as your knuckles brushed up against the hair on Joel’s thighs, gravity stopping Joel’s jeans when they stop at his ankles, your hand wraps the shaft of his cock. You slowly wrap your lips around the tip of Joel’s cock, and you hear him exhale in pleasure. 

Slowly pushing your head down the shaft of Joel’s cock, lips wrapped tight, you feel the veins trace the skin of your lips as the head of Joel’s cock press into the back of your throat. A groan of pleasure escapes Joel’s lips as you back your head up. You push your head forward and back leisurely, and you can tell the pace makes Joel go crazy. His member in your mouth kept throbbing against the roof of your mouth. Suddenly, your pace went a little faster; you looked up and noticed Joel’s eyes rolled into the back of his head, his hands were in tight fists, his knuckles threatening to pop out from his hand. The taste of salt fell upon your tongue as you backed your head up from Joel’s cock. A line of spit mixed with precum connecting from your mouth to the tip of Joel’s cock was made apparent, eventually dropping onto the ground below you as you wrapped your hand around Joel’s cock and started pumping his shaft.

The moans escaping Joel’s lips were music to your ears as your moans were to Joel. “Fuck, baby. Y’so good at that. Those boys are so fuckin’ stupid.” His southern drawl causes summersaults in your stomach. Sliding your mouth back onto Joel’s cock, a deep moan escapes his lips as your lips were at a quick pace, your hands planted on Joel’s thighs, the hair on his thighs pressed up against your hand as the tip of Joel’s cock kept hitting the back of your throat.

Moans, grunts, whines, and whimpers were all escaping from Joel’s lips, his hands holding onto your head as his hips humped into your head, his cock pressing deeper – causing you to gag a couple of times. Your nose kept poking into where Joel’s pubic hair rested; the scent was intoxicating, causing your cock to leak with precum below you. 

Suddenly, Joel held your head – your throat grasping around his cock, causing you to gag more. Slobber escaping your mouth as with each inhale through your nose – resting on Joel’s hairy patch made it impossible to exhale without gagging. Your palms were getting sweaty against Joel’s meaty thighs, the hair on his legs feeling nonexistent against your slippery hands.

His hands slide your head back, and lines of spit connect from his cock to your top and bottom lips. Deep inhales and exhales leave your body as you watch Joel slightly shudder. His cock glistened in your spit, throbbing. Sweat littered Joel’s hairy chest and forehead; you swallowed the spit in the back of your throat from your excessive breathing. Your forehead felt heavy with sweat as you looked up at Joel; he slid his hand up his forehead, pushing the curls that had stuck to his forehead. “Fuck, sorry, baby. Y’mouth is so fuckin’ addictin’.” 

“Don’t think I’m finished with you yet, Joel,” You spoke, disregarding his apology. Quickly eager to show Joel what you meant, you pick up his cock and slide your tongue on the underside of Joel’s shaft. Lapping your tongue against his veins, you could hear Joel praise you from above. “So fuckin’ perfect, who wouldn’t want to treat you right?”

Bringing your tongue slowly down to make Joel squirm, you feel his body Joel a little bit as you are still holding his cock in your hand; you place your mouth around his ball sack and lightly suck on one of them. “OH, FUCK!” Joel groaned. Joel’s body felt like jelly – incapable of holding himself up; Joel hadn’t felt this level of pleasure before, from anything he’s ever fucked before. “You like that, baby?” You asked. “Yes,” Joel gritted his teeth. “God, I love it s’much.” Backing your mouth up, you stroke Joel’s cock and watch Joel hold his head back and moans escaping his lips. Bending down, Joel places his hands between the fold of your armpits and picks you up from your knees. 

Planting his lips against yours, the kiss you shared between the two of you felt hungry, Lips mashing against each other, teeth clashing against each other. Joel’s arms holding you tightly against his torso. Joel was fucking starving for you as his lips were latching against your cheeks, jawline, against the skin of your neck. That feeling of Joel’s teeth against your neck made you know Joel was marking you as his. Your nails drag against Joel’s soft curls as you enjoy Joel’s mouth, bringing his head up back against your lips. Sweat from Joel’s chest was seeping through your shirt. You wanted to take it off to feel Joel’s skin against yours. Backing your head away from Joel’s, his head following suit as he watches you attempt to take your shirt off.

Holding the hem of your shirt, Joel helps you slide your shirt off your head, wrapping your arms around Joel’s neck, him wrapping his arms against your lower back. The warmth of each other’s bodies radiated against each other. Your cocks rubbed against each other; the warmth you both shared was hot enough to blow the roof off your bedroom. This experience felt surreal, like a dream you didn’t want to wake up from. 

Backing his head away from your lips, you notice a look of dominance in Joel’s eyes, which darken as he opens his mouth to speak. “Get on that bed, so I can fuck you the way you, a good boy like you should be fucked.”

“But, what if I’ve been a bad boy?” You tease. 

Leaning his head toward your ear. “Then I’ll have to punish you.”

“Get on that fuckin’ bed,” Joel commanded. You listened to Joel, letting your arms go from around his neck, your knees bent on the bed, as you pushed yourself to land your head where your pillow rested, your back collided with the soft cloud-like material. You watched Joel climb on the bed, stopping as he was positioned right between your legs. “Put your leg on my shoulder.”

Compiling to what Joel commanded, your ankle rested on Joel’s broad shoulder. A line of spit leaves Joel’s mouth and connects to the tip of his cock, rubbing the spit to lube up his cock. Slowly leaning over you, one next to your head, fingers spread apart. Joel moves his hand from the tip to his shaft as he starts to tease you – making you shudder in anticipation. 

Moving his cock to poke your hole makes you yearn for him every slight push into you. Hisses escaped your gritted teeth as you craved to feel good. “Joel, can you please fuck me?”

“Nuh uh, bad boys don’t get to beg,” Joel grinned.

Joel had let go of his length and placed his other hand next to the other side of your head. His hips were grinding into you, making you gasp and make your spine chill. Joel’s cock kept rubbing up against your sensitive tip, making you physically shudder and making your cock feel like it was about to burst. “I can tell how much you love this. M’cock grinding up against yours before I get you pregnant.” Your breath hitched as Joel’s voice made you want him more – you’ve never wanted anyone this bad before. 

“Joel, please. I need you.”

“How bad do you need me, sweetheart?” Joel growled into your ear. 

“So fuckin’ much, it's unbearable.”

“Well then, are you going to be my good boy?’

Nodding your head, you shut your eyes and licked your lips in anticipation. You notice that your ankle comes off Joel’s shoulder and collides with the mattress. You feel his lips press against yours briefly as you open your eyes and see Joel’s brown orbs looking into yours before he opens his mouth to speak. “Well, I can’t keep my good boy waitin’.” Looking in between your bodies, Joel adjusts his cock; you feel it press into you for a split second. He looks back up to you, “You ready, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, I am,” You answer. 

Joel slowly pushes in, and you feel the tip agonizingly stretch you out. Your moans rattle the walls next to you both. “Does it hurt, baby?” You shake your head, denying Joel’s question. His shaft is halfway in before he pulls out fast. You gasp before breathing heavily. “Damn, baby. Y’so fuckin’ tight,” Joel commented. Once again, Joel slides his cock into you, making your moans more intense than before. Halfway in, Joel rocks his hips back and forth slowly into you. Your eyes snapped shut intensely, straining your eyelids. The pain was starting to feel good, too good.

“Is this okay, baby?”

Opening your eyes, you notice the concern in Joel’s eyes. He looked so sweet, caring, and compassionate; you’ve always seen him like that growing up. “Yes, Joel. It’s okay,” You smile. Leaning down to kiss you, Joel’s hips still rocking into your hole, moans exiting your mouth and entering Joel’s. Feeling Joel slowly stretch you out felt indescribable; it felt good, but you did want Joel to go faster. “Joel,” You moan against Joel’s mouth. “Yes, baby?” 

Joel backs up to hear you properly. Before you could get a word out to Joel, one push further in, and you feel the base of Joel’s cock clap into you, which echoes throughout the room. Joel realizes what this means; a sly grin appears on Joel’s lips. “Hold that thought, doll,” Joel commanded.

His pace was faster and rougher. Claps rang throughout the room with each thrust, like an audience applauding at the end of a play. Your hands gripped the sheets or ran your hand down Joel’s back while Joel had his hand on the headboard. It felt like Joel had read your mind at that moment, knowing that you wanted more and that he would give it to you. “I can tell y’wanted this before you even said it, baby. Could hear ya screamin’ at me to fuck you harder.’

“Y’wanted this, didn’t ya?” Joel grunted. 

“God, yes, Joel. I’ve wanted something like this for so long, begging for it. This feels fucking amazing.”

“I’can say the same about this boy pussy of yours, grippin’ onto me so tight, it doesn’t want to let go, and I don’t think I want it to.” You bring your hands up to Joel’s back and dig your nails into his sleek skin; an exhale leaves Joel’s mouth as the pain settles in, but it subsides. 

“Mark me, baby. Make me yours.” 

Your nails drag down Joel’s back until you reach the small of Joel’s back. Joel bows his head, grabs your chin, and smashes his lips against yours, but his thrusts stop. You don’t feel anything warm inside you, so you know he didn’t cum. Wrapping your arms around his neck, Joel lifts you for a second so you can get up from the sheets below you. Noticing Joel starts to lay himself down, you quickly move your hands on the mattress to keep yourself from crashing into Joel. You still feel Joel’s cock inside you as his hips start to lift up and down. 

That time when you complained about only being in one position with a guy, Joel did hear you and was giving you something you wanted. 

“Sorry for the sudden stop, wanted to fuck you more.”

Backing your head up, you watched as Joel bore his teeth and started to fuck you senselessly. Wrapping his arms tight around your lower back. Your nails dug into the soft material under your sweaty palms; you could feel the fibers begin to tear a bit. “You like this, don’t ya, baby? Being fucked like the sluts I’ve seen you watch on your phone.”

“Craving to be them, wanting someone to fuck you till you can’t feel your legs no more, huh?”

“Yes.” You whined. 

“Wantin’ someone as strong and big as those guys you watch to be able to fill your sweet, tight, boy pussy with hot cum.”

Nodding your head. “Mhmm.”

“Well, I’m here. I’m gonna satisfy your needs, your aches, your cravings for you to be filled with cum. If anyone else tries. I’ll gladly show them who can treat you better and fuck you in front of them, understood, baby.”

“Mhmm.” 

Joel’s hand connects with your ass, a hard smack against it; a cry leaves your mouth. “I need a fuckin’ yes, boy.”

“Yes, Joel, yes.” You whined.

You felt something move from inside you. You see, Joel looks to wear your cock, but he’s looking in between you both. “You feel my cock twitchin’ inside you, doll? You want me to cum inside you?”  “Yes,” You quickly answer and nod. “You’re leakin’ all over my stomach, baby; you wanna cum too?” 

You whimper out an answer. “Then, I better give my boy what he wants.”

Joel slides his cock out of you and lays you on your stomach as he comes up from behind you and slowly teases you. You feel his cock glide between the bends of your ass cheeks, feelings his balls press into them. “Damn, your ass is achin’ f’me right now. I will give you what you deserve, boy.” 

That feeling of being stretched out came back as you rested your forehead on the bed. Joel’s hands dug into your skin; each push of his length made your moans push out of you more. It was like your body was in heat — Joel’s heat. He was an animal in heat when it came to you. Nodding your head, you felt Joel’s hand on your throat and his lips against your ear — his mustache tickling it. “I’m so –thrust–  close to – cummin’ inside this tight ass of yours, baby. Do you want my cum to swim inside you?”

“Yes, Joel. I fuckin’ do.” 

“Then let me give you what you deserve.” Backing his head up, Joel dug into your skin like he was kneading dough; his thrusts were rough, almost splitting you in half. You could feel his cock throb inside you as you felt your shaft pulsating. You knew you were about to cum. “Fuck, I can’t get enough of you, baby. I don’t wanna stop after I cum in you.” “Joel, I’m so close. Keep going.”

“Fuck,” Joel growled. “I love it when you beg like that.”

His pace was going faster, and it felt the tip of your cock felt like it was going to explode with your cum. “Fuck, Joel. I’m gonna cum.” 

“Fuck, baby. Me too.’

“Here it comes,” Joel gritted his teeth. 

With one final push, you feel your cum shoot out onto the sheets below you, and you also feel Joel’s cum swim inside you. Light breaths are escaping both of you as you feel Joel slide his cock out of you; a squelching sound is heard as Joel’s cock finally dislodges from your hole. A sigh of relief exits Joel’s mouth as he connects his back to the bed. Turning your neck, you see Joel — soft cock against his stomach as you see his chest dip and rise from the breaths he’s taking.

Picking yourself up from your position, you lay down next to Joel, your head resting on his sweaty, hairy chest. Joel’s arm wraps around you as he pulls you closer to him. 

“So, was that everything you’ve ever wanted?” Joel questioned. 

Nodding your head against his chest. “Yeah, and better than what I could imagine.”

Joel chuckles at your statement, and you join him. Once the laughter dies down, a realization hits him like a bag of bricks. “Y’know, for a moment, I forgot that you’re running off to college without me. Followin’ those dreams and gettin’ your degree.”

“Joel,” You start.

“Havin’ a life, a career, findin’ someone who will love you as much as I do.”

“Joel,” You repeat. 

“Havin’ kids of your own, playin’ with their own action figures or dolls, and I’ll be at the bottom of some —”

“JOEL.” 

Joel jumped at your sudden outburst; he was looking at you instead of the ceiling. He saw you staring at him; he felt frightened but safe simultaneously. You suddenly straddle his lap, his hands on your waist, molding his hands onto you. “You’re coming with me to college.” 

“W-what?” Joel smiled. “When did you come to that decision?” 

“When you gave the most beautiful profession of love when I was on your lap, it made me realize something.” Joel awaited your realization, but he couldn’t lie; you sitting naked on his lap like that, faces inches away from each other, he was starting to get horny again. “I know you can never be real, but that’s okay; it sucks that we won’t grow old together, but you’ll always be there for me, and if I do meet someone, you’ll always be the first person I’ve ever loved, Joel.”

A smile appeared on Joel’s face; you couldn’t tell if sweat or a tear was falling from Joel’s eye when he quickly rolled you on your back and was inches away from you. His smell was intoxicating; the sweat mixed with lust made your cock twitch like crazy. “You’re such a softie, y’know that?” Joel quoted. 

“Only for you, sweetheart,” You quoted. 

“Now, how do you feel about one more round?” Joel questioned. 

“Well, everyone will be out for a while.”

“Should I take my time?”

“Joel, fuckin’ show me a good time.” 

“Okay, my good boy, lemme show you a good time,” Joel states, kissing your lips. Feeling the love from Joel’s kisses, you realize you didn’t need anyone to love you as much as Joel did, and you were fine with that. You didn’t care that he wasn’t real; he felt he was real to you, and that’s all you need.

[bubuslutty]

40-something Moon Man ROCKS the Dancefloor! (REAL NOT CLICKBAIT!)

pairing: Marc Spector & Female Reader

word count: 4026

warnings: none

summary:

Marc Spector accidentally goes viral on TikTok after his uni student neighbour/friend drags him to the club with her.

a/n: i wrote this in a silly goofy mood and i love marc sooo much <3 Also I used Darling instead of Y/n cuz im funky like that.

“Please, Marc.” Darling begged the 40-something man while he tried to clean his flat.

“No.” Marc answered flatly, wearing a very washed-out and loose t-shirt and a pair of dark blue shorts. His hair, now longer was tied at the back of his head in a tiny man bun.

“Why??? We’ll have so much fun and you need a night out to dislodge the stick up your ass.” Darling groaned and fell on her knees in the kitchen, ready to hold onto his legs and beg if need be. Marc sighed and ignored the 19-year-old teenager on his kitchen floor as he cracked another window open and increased the volume of the radio on the window ledge, BBC Radio 1 playing a Central Cee song in the flat as he picked up stray books, papers, food wrappers, socks and random junk, a bin bag clutched in one hand and a laundry basket clutched in his other arm.

Marc finally got himself to start cleaning his flat, he read that it would help his mental health to live in a cleaner space. That’s why she was over, she was meant to help him clean so it wouldn’t be too overwhelming on his own, and motivate him to get on with cleaning so he finished faster and could escape her non-ending yapping sessions. But now, it seemed like she was more interested in annoying him, which is literally second nature now, a natural reaction she had to him, annoying the shit out of Marc. 

I mean, he could literally kick her out, and scare her enough that she’ll leave him alone for good, he’s done it before, to other people. He’s tried, but she’s Steven’s friend and he can’t do that to him. And he knows deep down he actually enjoys her presence and would kill anyone that hurts her then himself. He cannot lie, the kid had a big heart and was incredibly kind and patient. He was a little jealous that her parents were able to make a girl like that because Marc knew he could never produce that level of goodness into the world. He can never come close. She was too good.

Marc dropped the basket on a chair and the trash bag on top of it, letting out a long sigh and putting his hands on his hips. “Why do you want me to go with you?”

Darling’s miserable puppy eyes immediately vanished and she got up from the floor, walking up to him with a huge grin on her face. “Well, first of all, you’re my friend, and I like hanging out with you.” Marc raised one brow and didn’t say anything.

“I found this club with great music and I really want to try it out,” Darling said shrugging.

“Why don’t you go with your friends? People your own age.” Marc asked, his arms now crossed over his chest. “People from my uni are… I never really enjoyed going out with them, sure, nothing terrible happened cuz we always stuck together but uh-” Darling tried to explain and Marc failed to understand why the hell she wanted him to go with her out of all people.

“I’ll just be in the way if I go with you. And I can always pick you up at the end of the night, you know?” Marc said and Darling frowned in confusion, “In the way of what?” 

Marc almost laughed in disbelief but held it together, “Don’t you want a boyfriend? No one will get close to you if I’m with you.” 

Darling looked unimpressed, “What boyfriend? You mean drunk finance bros with an Andrew Tate mentality? Plus, I don’t do hookups, I have anxiety, mate.” Marc was confused and Darling remembered he wasn’t as chronically online as she was, so he probably had no idea who the abomination of a man was.

“I just want the experience. I just want to dress up and dance all night without men I don’t know breathing down my neck.” Darling explained, picking lint up from her way too big t-shirt with a Pikachu plastered on the front, so she wouldn’t have to look at him in the eyes.

Marc understood and thought about it for a second before picking up the trash bag and walking to the area that was his kitchen and putting it on the floor, next to the bin. “You want me to be your bodyguard?”

Darling’s head snapped up, eyes wide, “No! I mean- Yeah, sure..” 

Marc pondered over the thought and asked, “When?” 

“This Friday.” Darling quickly answered, smiling big and all, excitement radiating off her in waves.

“Alright, but so you know, I don’t dance.” That’s also what Chad from High School Musical said but go off. Darling knew to keep her mouth shut instead of calling him out.

“Thank you. Thank you so much!” She squealed, jumping up and wrapping her arms around his waist.

“Alright, enough.” He grumbled even though he was smiling, and ripped her away with his hands on her shoulders. “You won’t regret this,” Darling promised and Marc just nodded, he’ll see about that.

“Now, do me a favour,” Marc said, turning around and picking up two trash bags in his hands. “Take out the trash.” 

Darling groaned and Marc fixed her with a look and her shoulders slumped, taking the bags out of the door to put them downstairs.

🌙

“How do I look? Be honest.” Darling asked, standing in the corridors as Marc locked his door and shoved the keys in his pockets, his black leather jacket held in his other hand.

Marc straightened his back and analysed her outfit from head to toe. She was wearing a sleeveless, backless sparkly blue top paired with jean shorts and white trainers. Simply put, she looked pretty and it surprised Marc a little, he didn’t know she was capable of wearing anything but washed-out old t-shirts with unhinged slogans on them. It was an addiction at this point, she loved buying the weirdest t-shirts she could find on the internet. She even bought him a t-shirt once that said “I lactate”. And swear to God, Marc almost killed her right then and there. It’s still ranked as one of her “biggest Ws” whatever the fuck that meant.

“Not ugly,” Marc answered flatly and Darling grinned, that was Marc’s way of saying she looked nice. 

“And you look great, did Jake pick the clothes?” She asked, looking him over.

“No.” Marc lied and she giggled, because the one who dressed cunty every single time without fail, was Jake, and unfortunately, Marc didn’t possess the level of serve Jake did.

Marc was wearing a black short-sleeved button-up, unbuttoned at the top, where his David’s star necklace glinted against his tan chest, paired with black trousers and black shoes. Simple, clean. His hair was brushed back this time, but still, some curls fell over his forehead no matter how many times he ran his fingers through it.

“Let’s go,” Darling said after checking she had everything she needed in her small handbag.

The two decided to take the underground rather than Jake’s cab because it was faster than being stuck in traffic in central London. It was a bit busy and lots of people looked like they were heading to clubs and pubs for the night, dressed in all sorts of manner. Marc was honestly just looking around and taking everything in, he had never witnessed London’s nightlife like this, maybe saw some things from rooftops while tracking someone, but that didn’t count.

He saw an alarming amount of young men dressed in techs, standing in hoards. And girls wearing matching bodycon dresses. The underground station was hot, extremely loud and stinky. Darling was standing next to him, complaining about the prices that TFL charged. How ridiculously expensive the tube and trains were, even with a student oyster. He just hoped he wouldn’t get a nasty headache by the end of the night.

They hopped on the tube when it came, screeching to a stop, people spilling out of it in crowds. When they got in, they sat across each other as more people sat around them. And if it couldn’t get any louder, a man walked in with a big speaker resting on his shoulder and a cracked iPhone gripped in his other hand. “Bassline Junkie” blasted loudly as he sang along, and soon enough, a group of rowdy teenagers, around Darling’s age, started singing along too. Darling started laughing and Marc watched as the man started approaching them, goading the sitting people to get up and start singing with him. Darling got up and shouted the lyrics at some girls as they sang together. They somehow managed to drag Darling away from her seat, holding each other and singing loudly, multiple phones recording the scene. When they reached their stop, Marc got up and pulled Darling by the hand out of the tube before they missed it.

“BYE!” She shouted over her shoulder, laughing and breathing hard.

Marc let go of her hand and watched her put her hands on her knees, panting and straightening, fixing her hair and looking at Marc with bright eyes, “I’ve never done that before.”

He smiled a little, “Good job.”

“To the club!” Darling pointed in the direction of the gates, pulling Marc by his arm.

When they left the station, Darling let out a shuddering breathing, suddenly feeling very cold in the polluted crisp air of London. Marc noticed and frowned, “Don’t get sick.”

“Wow, thank you, Marc.” Darling rolled her eyes and started walking down the street, Marc following her behind. She turned around, walking backwards, “By the way, I have your jacket so I won’t get sick.”

“I’m not giving you my jacket, dipshit.” Marc said and Darling rolled her eyes, “Yeah, whatever you say.”

They spent 30 minutes trying to figure out where the hell that club was, bickering while following the map on Darling’s phone. At some point, she ended up locking arms with Marc after a rando whistled after her when she walked by and had to physically stop Marc from turning around and bashing the man’s face in.

When they finally reached the club, Darling was so excited and Marc had a hand wrapped around the back of her neck, guiding her through the crowds of people to the bar so they could get a drink in their system first and take in the place. “You’re paying, by the way,” Darling said over the loud music, taking a sip of her cocktail, this drink will probably be her first and last. She didn’t plan on throwing up on the pavement, and she wants to be able to remember tonight.

“You’re the one taking me out, aren’t you supposed to be paying?” Marc asked, leaning in so she could hear him over the music. “I’m paying for kebabs later. 50/50, yeah?” She said and he hummed.

He looked around and noticed how a lot of people were dressed, it faintly reminded him of the early 2000s with twists to fit today’s fashion trends. He could tell that this was the look Darling was going for, then he finally allowed himself to actually hear the music and was surprised when Flo Rida was blasting from the speakers, the floor vibrating under the weight of the bass.

“Come on, let’s dance,” Darling said after she finished her drink and dragged him on the dance floor, drink still in hand. Rihanna was now playing and Marc was a little mortified because he doesn’t remember the last time he danced in a club. Darling gave him encouraging nods while she practised a Just Dance routine without missing a beat as Marc nodded to the music, finishing his drink and trying not to laugh at her and failing miserably.

At some point Darling got rid of his empty glass for him and ran back, almost crashing face-first on his chest if he didn’t catch her. “THAT’S MY SONG!” She shouted over the music and Marc immediately recognised the beat. It was that Usher song that even the aliens from outer space could recognise, the one and only: “Yeah!”. Marc was a little confused because he was sure as hell she wasn’t even born when it came out.

“I WAS BORN TO SERVE CUNT AND SLAY THE CLUB!” She shrieked and Marc knew she must be out of her mind because there’s no way one drink made her say shit like that. He was dragged to the centre of the dance floor and Darling started busting moves he never saw her do, and Marc had to admit, she was a good dancer. But he was a great dancer.

He ran a hand through his curly hair and watched her dance with fire in her eyes. Marc smirked. Alright , if this is how this is going to go, then so be it. He popped another button open from the top of the shirt and rolled his neck, getting his muscles loose, nodding to the beat. Darling watched him as she bounced with the beat and honest to God, Marc started krumping. Krumping in the club.

Darling’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets and she screamed in delight, hyping him up with her whole body, “I knew you could do it!” 

He was good. Really good.  

So good in fact that the people around them started to notice and the space between them got bigger, creating a clear space where they could see Marc and Darling better. Darling didn’t even notice, her eyes glued to Marc who was absolutely destroying the dance floor. She didn’t even notice the phones pulled out to record the scene. And when it looked like Darling was starting to lose against Marc, a random girl squeezed herself through the crowd, handing Darling her drink and started dancing battling Marc. Darling was losing her mind, laughing and having the time of her life. The crowd hyped both the girl and Marc.

Marc was smiling the whole time, his curls moving this and that way, now falling over his eyes, sticking to his forehead. His face was warm and his necklace kept constantly swinging as he ate up every single person who decided to battle him. In between songs, he kept being offered drinks while Darling kept complimenting his skills. She was proud to get him out of his shell and was genuinely so grateful that everything went as planned. But most importantly, she was proud of him.

Hours later, by the time they left the club, the two were walking down the streets, singing together to a Britney Spears song, arms linked and still warm and sweaty. Darling had Marc’s (Well, it was actually Jake’s) leather jacket draped over her shoulders, keeping her shielded from the cold wind. Meanwhile, Marc may as well unbutton his shirt all the way down and take it off because it was sticking to him and a huge, very generous chunk of his chest could be seen, still shining with drying sweat. His hair was a little crazy because no matter what he tried to do, it refused to stay still and he didn’t have anything to hold it with. But that’s alright, he looked very pretty and he had a great time to care about his hair at the moment.

The two made their way to the first kebab place they saw. “What do you want?” She asked, looking at the old and worn menu above the counter, on the wall. “A number 2.” 

“Bossman, let me get two number 2s and two Coke Zero’s.” Darling said and the man nodded, “£22.98, please.” Darling reached for her purse. “I got it,” Marc said, digging in his pocket for notes before she had the chance to protest.

“I was going to pay.” She mumbled, rubbing her eyes, feeling tired.

“You can pay next time.” He said, patting her head.

“You always say that and you never let me.” She complained, leaning her weight against him, cheek squished against his warm arm. “Yeah, yeah.” Marc checked his phone for any notifications and scrolled a bit while waiting for their food to be done. When they got their food, they left the joint because there were literally no seats in there, you just collect your food and leave. Marc held the plastic bag in one hand and wrapped the other around Darling’s shoulder just in case she tripped, she didn’t drink much but she exhausted herself to the bone, and he didn’t want to end up in the ER looking after her.

“Do you want to eat in the tube?” He asked.

“No, I’ll get sick. Aren’t there any chairs anywhere?” She asked.

Marc hummed and looked around, spotting a park? A garden? It was really small and fenced, and in the middle, there was a big statue of a man Marc couldn’t recognise. He walked closer and saw that there was an empty bench inside. Perfect.

They got settled down, Marc unwrapped their food and Darling complained about the cold bench against her thighs. “Sit on the jacket.” He said, opening his Coke and taking a sip.

“But then my back will touch the bench.” She complained and Marc rolled his eyes.

“Just eat your food.” He said and they dug in.

They didn’t speak for a long time, both looking up at the dark sky. There were no stars to be seen due to the city lights, but they could see the moon and the clouds. It was as peaceful as London could get. When they were done, they collected the trash in the plastic bag but didn’t move, still sitting on the bench, looking at the moon together. “Uhm-” Marc spoke and Darling turned to look at him. As soon as she met his eyes, he snapped his mouth shut.

Darling didn’t say anything, just looked at him with an open expression, eyes heavy-lidded due to sleepiness. Marc licked his lower lip and parted his lips to speak but nothing came out. So instead, he opted for squeezing one of her knees in his warm hand, trying to make her understand what he was trying to say with his eyes.

He wanted to say thank you. He wanted to say that he appreciated her taking him out with her. He appreciated her patience and kindness. He appreciated how she never judged him for being himself. How she was brave and strong and didn’t get scared easily. 

And Darling understood.

🌙

It was around 12 in the afternoon the next day when Darling got a text message from one of her uni friends. She frowned in confusion, she usually never received any messages from them during the weekends. She put her spoon in her cereal bowl as she chewed, and paused the YouTube video she was watching on her laptop.

Darling opened the message. It was two messages actually, one of them read, “Is this you?” And the other was a link. 

She suddenly felt scared as her finger hovered over the link, she was sure she had a good digital footprint. I mean, she had profiles where family and friends followed, and she also had separate accounts online where she caused havoc without revealing her identity. And she was sure there was no way anyone she knew in real life could find her accounts and link them to her. She was careful.

Darling opened the link and instead of loading in a browser tab, it opened the TikTok app. Now, what the hell is this?

At first, she didn’t know what she was looking at, but her brain caught on and she felt like screaming. It was a video of the day before, from the club. There she was dancing battling Marc in the middle of the circle. Her jaw was on the floor, she couldn’t believe her eyes. Then she looked at the likes and screamed because why did it have 2M likes?

Her finger pressed the comment section before she could think and was flooded with comments like “This is what I mean when I say I want to go to the club”, “Okay but why did he eat?”, “Where is this??”, “Get this man in a Step Up movie NOW”, “Goo Goo Ga Ga”.

Darling leapt off the bed laughing and scrambled out of her flat, phone in hand. She didn’t even bother to wear slippers and instead ran over next door, Steven’s door, knocking quickly. When the door didn’t open in a millisecond, she turned the doorknob and walked inside without bothering to shut the door properly behind her, “Marc, you have to see this!”

Marc was in bed, shirtless and wearing a pair of loose PJ bottoms, wearing his reading glasses as he read his book. Well, he wasn’t reading it now . He was looking at Darling with an annoyed expression. She ignored it and ran to him, but not without throwing a quick “Hi, Gus” to the tank. She dived knees first on his bed and he sighed, slamming his book shut and placing it on the bedside table.

“What do you want?” 

“Look!” She held her phone in front of his face and he tried to comprehend what he was looking at. Darling saw the moment he realised what it was, he grabbed the phone with both hands, a look of horror plastered on his face. “All of London saw the video. You’re viral, Marc.”

“Delete it.” He said without ripping his eyes from the screen.

“What?” Darling frowned.

“Delete it. Right now.” He repeated.

“It’s not my video. I can’t delete it.” Darling said and Marc dropped the phone in his lap, gathering his head in his hands, groaning. He truly had fun, but he didn’t know how he felt about all of London seeing this video.

Darling picked up her phone again, “I’m going to send it to DuChamp, he’s going to love it.” 

Marc screamed and ripped the phone away from her hands, scaring her. She got scared not because he had taken her phone but because she never heard the man scream before. “Give it back!” She said, trying to grab her phone but Marc didn’t let her. It was a struggle because not only Marc was stronger, way stronger, but he wasn’t wearing a t-shirt so she didn’t have any grip on him, except his shoulders and hair. But she knew if she even thought about pulling his hair he’d throw her out of the window. “I’m going to report the video so it can be taken down.” He said and Darling gasped, “You don’t even know how to do that! You never used TikTok in your life, boomer!” 

“Watch me,” Marc said through gritted teeth as Darling struggled against him, then she somehow managed to wrap her arms around his free arm and threw herself down on the bed, back first and swung her legs up to wrap them around his head, choking him. Marc let out a surprised shout, his eyes sent 500 million invisible daggers to Darling. He threw the phone down on the floor, out of her reach and lifted her off the bed, her legs still wrapped around his neck and she screamed when he flipped them around and slammed her down on the bed, head first, WWE style. 

The two kept wrestling and clawing at each other until Darling ended up in a headlock, Marc squishing her body on the bed with his whole weight, “Help!” She wheezed, clawing at him, trying to get away from him. “Quit it.” He hissed as she tried to kick him with the heel of her foot on his ass.

A cough startled the two out of their fight, both of them looked up and Marc froze.

“What are you…doing?” Layla asked, looking at Marc, then back down at Darling. She had her phone in her hand, and a big Tesco shopping bag in the other. God bless her heart, she brought her disaster of not-technically-divorced husband groceries.

“Oooh, is that the bad bitch you fumbled-”

🌙

Tag list (pls ask to be added or removed): @bobastayhigh @weblesstherains @h-leigh @unspokenmoon @ahookedheroespureheart @thursdaywritings @gebstargeb @softieekayy @fem-moony @peachjellypackets @pakhiya @darlinglittledevil @anixluxtt @mrs-cupidd @gebgeb @poeticabomination

this work is part of the "I'm friends with the moon" series. You can read it as a stand-alone or delve deeper into this AU.

[harrywavycurly]

Can I please get Princess and Eddie when she calls him for random things? I do this all the time to my partner 🙈

Hiiiii babes!! Of course you can!! Honestly I used to call my oldest brother for the most random shit so some of this is based on that😂 but anyway! Hope you enjoy!💖

-find all things Eddie x Princess here✨

*Most of the time Eddie can’t help but slightly panic anytime you call him…but sometimes he can’t help but laugh*

“Hey Baby…Baby?…Are you okay?” “I think…the dryer ate one of my fuzzy socks.” “What?” “It’s the pink and white one that has the little grippy things on the bottom…I think it ate it.” “The dryer?” “Yes…can you not hear me? Is the shop busy?” “No no I can hear you fine baby…uh you…said the dryer ate your fuzzy sock?” “Yes the left one to be exact…it gave me the right one back just fine.” “Do you need this sock right now or can you wait for me to get home and I’ll check to see if it got caught in the lint trap?” “Lint trap? Where’s that?” “It’s in the front of the dryer near the door…it has a little like handle thing and you pull it up and clean it between each load.” “One moment I’m gonna put you on speaker….okay honey can you repeat that? Where’s the trap thing?” “It’s in the front-” “ah I found it!” “The trap or the sock?” “The sock…it was stuck at the top of the dryer thing…okay that’s all I needed…love you see you when you get home.” “Uh okay love you too baby.”

“Honey I need help.” “What? What’s wrong sweetheart?” “Someone’s knocking on the door and Wayne isn’t home and I’m not expecting anyone…” “okay can you do me a favor? Look outside the window in the bedroom and tell me what kind of car is in the driveway.” “Uh okay…one moment…uhm it’s…a minivan…” “is it green?” “Yes…” “baby that’s Mrs. Thomas’s granddaughter…she’s just delivering the Girl Scout cookies we ordered….” “Oh my thin mints!” “Exactly sweetheart…” “did we already pay for them?” “Yes baby we paid for them already you just have to answer the door…” “oh right! Yes okay…I’m gonna go answer the door then.” “I love you…save me some thin mints okay?” “I make no promises…but I love you too.”

“Hey Princess everything okay?” “My bike tire is flat and I was seeing if you could send someone to like…tow it to the shop so you can fill it with air like you normally do?” “You want me to tow…your bike to the shop?” “Well…how else would it get there?” “I can just put it in the back of the van baby…” “oh it’ll fit?” “Yes…unless you’ve exchanged your ten speed for a motorcycle without telling me?” “I’d look good on a motorcycle.” “You would…but it’s not happening sweetheart…now where are you?” “Robin’s…will you be the one coming to get me or someone else?” “You really think I’d let someone else come get you and your broken down bike? Come on baby…you know me better than that.” “That’s true…I’ll see you soon then?” “See you soon Princess.”

“Before you ask yes I’m fine but…something happened.” “Do I need to be sitting down for this?” “No…maybe?…I don’t know.” “Just tell me baby.” “I accidentally locked myself out of the house.” “Okay…where’s Wayne? He has a spare key.” “He’s at work…so I tried to get back in by crawling through the window in our bathroom because it’s the only one I could reach and pull myself through.” “Okay…” “and it worked like…I’m in the house…but uhm I’m stuck.” “Stuck? Where…are you stuck at baby?” “The bathroom…my foot fell into the toilet and now it’s kinda…stuck.” “You…got your foot stuck in the toilet?…like your foot is in the toilet right now?” “Don’t you dare laugh at me Edward James Munson..my sock is all soggy.” “Baby just take your foot out of your shoe.” “What?” “Just take your foot out of your shoe…that way it’s just the shoe that’s stuck and your foot will be free.” “I…I didn’t think of that…” “That’s what I’m here for Princess.” “It worked…now there’s just a shoe stuck in our toilet.” “That’s fine I’m about to get off so I’ll mess with it…but you’re okay right? You didn’t hurt yourself when you went through the window?” “I’m fine…we need to get a hide a key.” “Uhm baby…we have one.” “What? Where?” “Not sure…you’re the one who hid it…”

[windowcleaningsupplies]

Enhancing Clarity: A Comprehensive Guide to Window Cleaning Tools

Windows serve as the portals to our homes and offices, allowing natural light to flood our spaces and offering views of the world beyond. However, maintaining their cleanliness is essential not only for aesthetic appeal but also for ensuring a healthy living or working environment. In the arsenal of tools available for this task, there exists a plethora of options tailored to different needs and preferences. In this guide, we delve into the world of window cleaning tools, exploring their functionalities, advantages, and how they contribute to achieving sparkling, streak-free glass surfaces.window cleaning supplies

Squeegees:

Squeegees are perhaps the quintessential tool for achieving streak-free windows. Consisting of a rubber blade attached to a handle, they efficiently remove water and cleaning solutions from glass surfaces. Their design allows for swift, uniform strokes, making them ideal for both residential and commercial applications. Squeegees come in various sizes to accommodate different window dimensions, and some models feature adjustable handles for added convenience.

Microfiber Cloths:

Microfiber cloths have revolutionized the way we clean windows, offering superior absorbency and trapping capabilities compared to traditional cotton cloths. These ultra-fine fibers capture dirt, dust, and grime with ease, leaving windows spotless and lint-free. When paired with a cleaning solution, microfiber cloths excel at polishing glass surfaces to a brilliant shine without leaving behind residue or streaks. They are reusable and machine washable, making them an eco-friendly option for sustainable cleaning practices.

Extension Poles:

For windows located in high or hard-to-reach areas, extension poles are indispensable tools that enhance accessibility and safety. These telescopic rods can be attached to squeegees, scrubbers, or other cleaning implements, allowing users to reach windows situated on upper floors or in narrow spaces without the need for ladders or scaffolding. Extension poles come in various lengths, with some models featuring twist-lock mechanisms for secure attachment and adjustable angles for versatile use.

Scrubbers:

Stubborn dirt and grime often require a bit of elbow grease to eradicate, and scrubbers are designed precisely for this purpose. These abrasive pads or brushes feature durable bristles or abrasive surfaces that effectively loosen and dislodge dirt from glass surfaces. When paired with a cleaning solution, scrubbers provide thorough cleaning power, preparing the glass for a streak-free finish when used in conjunction with a squeegee or microfiber cloth. Some scrubbers feature pivoting heads or swivel mechanisms for enhanced maneuverability, ensuring thorough cleaning even in tight spaces.

Window Cleaning Solution:

Choosing the right cleaning solution is crucial for achieving optimal results when cleaning windows. While commercial glass cleaners are readily available, many opt for homemade solutions using ingredients such as vinegar, dish soap, or rubbing alcohol. These DIY solutions are often more cost-effective and environmentally friendly, providing effective cleaning power without harsh chemicals or fumes. Regardless of whether you choose a commercial or homemade solution, be sure to use a spray bottle for even application and minimal waste.

Water-fed Pole Systems:

Water-fed pole systems offer a streamlined approach to window cleaning, particularly for large-scale or multi-story buildings. These systems consist of telescopic poles equipped with water jets and soft bristle brushes at the tip. Purified water is pumped through the pole and sprayed onto the window surface, loosening dirt and debris. The brushes agitate the dirt, while the continuous flow of water rinses it away, leaving behind a clean, streak-free surface. Water-fed pole systems are highly efficient and reduce the need for chemical cleaners, making them an eco-friendly option for commercial window cleaning operations.

Conclusion:

Maintaining clean and clear windows enhances the overall appearance and ambiance of any space while promoting a healthy indoor environment. With the myriad of window cleaning tools available, from squeegees and microfiber cloths to extension poles and water-fed pole systems, achieving sparkling, streak-free windows has never been easier. By investing in the right tools and techniques, you can keep your windows looking their best year-round, allowing natural light to illuminate your surroundings and providing unobstructed views of the world beyond.

[vintageslideshow]

today’s ten minute project: rinsing the wash-out manually

So I was going through some newly-obtained slides and noticed that the flash on someone’s 1985 Christmas party was too bright on the subject. Here’s the original scan with no tweaking:

See what I mean? Okay, first things first, how about we clean this up in the scanner using Digital ICE on mild to get the dust and lint out, plus just a touch of grain removal and a light sharpening so this will come out a little better. I then touch the Restore Colors and the Restore Fading checkboxes, but neither of them do enough significant repair in the previews so I leave them off.

Okay, good foundation to work with. Taking this version and viewing it in IrfanView, my free Swiss army knife viewer of choice, to try some adjustments in the various levels to make this less high-key. After some trial and error I settle on reducing the contrast to 55%, lowering the light intensity down to 0.65, and raising the saturation to 85. I don’t want to change any of the color balance this time because this image seems properly weighted, which is a rarity.

The result pleases me so I leave it at this and figure any further messing to bring more color to her face would also affect the white walls; we can now see that her sweater is peach.

Not sure those are really her size. But now you, my awesome readers, are saying, “But can’t the scanner software itself fix the colors somehow, even if the automatic tools don’t do the trick?” Yes, yes it can. Here, let me pull up another slide of this woman, and I’ll show you the preview screens in VueScan of how she looks with no changes to the color setting...

...and how it looks if the limits of the color scale are moved just a bit away from white, in a manner similar to what Photoshop can do in its Adjustments:Levels window (though without the center marker for within-scale tweaking)...

Okay, that brought out some color! At the same time I also reduced the brightness by roughly 20% to increase the shadows and, as a pleasant side-effect, this also added a bit of vignetting to the perimeter. Now let’s scan and see how this works!

There’s a little wiggle room here for further reduction of brightness, sure, but the point here is that we got to this aesthetic juncture without fiddling in an external editor or relying on the scanner’s preset tricks to do the work for us.

[marshmallowprotection]

(raises hand) So Jaehee's biggest issue with animals and pets is shedding fur, right? Then would she be willing to talk about maybe adopting a sphinx cat or another kind of furless/minimal mess animal?

I completely understand her grief about fur and any potential contamination concerns she has about pet fur when we run a cafe with her, but as someone who grew up with animals nothing really feels the same without a lil friend to come home to after work (and sphynx cats in sweaters are so so so cute)

For one, it is definitely the fur that she has to clean up. She does not enjoy having to do that. It can be tedious if you haven't committed yourself to knowing that that's something that you need to do every day. Taking care of a long-haired cat can take up a long part of your evening when you have a scheduled routine with them. Some times of year are better than others… some are worse. For Jaehee, she never signed up for any of it. It was something Jumin asked her to do and she went with it. 

It's not like she hates animals or has anything against them. But, taking care of a pet and knowing that you have to do a lot to make sure that they're happy and healthy, is a commitment that you need to be willing to go through all the motions for. She's okay with animals as long as she has all of the information that you could possibly need.

After all, she is somebody that likes to plan for the moment and that means that there's a lot of time spent on ensuring that everything is prepped and good to go! She doesn't want to be thrown into something without knowing details. Which, when you think about it, is pretty reasonable.

If you are the kind of person that definitely wants to have an animal in your life, definitely consider having a talk with her ahead of time and working out those details. She's not going to turn it down flat! She is willing to work with you on this subject but you need to listen to her concerns as much as she needs to listen to your wants. It's just one of those things where you have to meet in the middle and see what's going to work the best.

This might be one of those things that helps you find that common ground in the middle. There is some work to be done but it's not quite as tedious as a pet like Elizabeth the 3rd. These cats need a bath more often than a cat with a ton of fur! But, that’s a small trade off to using a lint roller all the time. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind that. It makes you happy to have this cat, and she wants you to be happy! Who knows, maybe she winds up bonding with this cat when they sit together in the window... watching snow flutter to the ground in matching sweaters while you smile.

[whiteantcrawls]

If you’re going to use your home environment to photograph your plushes, to show your work off and/or advertise them for sale, please, take some time to look around at what your photo background is, and ask yourself:

--is the background busy? Does it distract from the plush? (bookshelves, plants, clutter, windows with glare, TV on, etc.)

--Is the lighting adequate, so the photos aren’t too dark, too over-exposed, and the colors show well, without lots of shadows?

--Is the environment/background clean? Is the carpet clean? Is the table/counter dusty and full of dirty dishes? Are the windows grimy? Are the bedsheet rumpled and visibly dirty? If you’re sitting your plush on the carpet or your bed, and that carpet/bed is visibly dirty, stained, covered in cat food, hair/fur, threads, general grossness, is that going to make someone want to buy this plush? 

--Is the plush itself clean? Is it covered in loose fluff, car hair, threads, dust, etc.?

--If take photos outside, are you sitting the plush directly on dirt? In a tree? On the grass? Are you going to spot and steam clean it, before you sell it someone with allergies?

If you’re selling plushes, strive to show a clean, professional environment in your photos. Take a minute to clear your work surface, vacuum your carpet, drape a clean sheet, pull over an extra lamp, lint-roll the plush. There’s soooo much competition in the plush world. Tt makes no sense to shoot yourself in the foot from the get-go with photos that not only don’t show the plush to advantage, but actively discourage a buyer from paying for something you made.

[prep4tomoro]

The Many Surprising Uses for Household (White) Vinegar:

People have been using vinegar for thousands of years for everything from food preservation to sanitation! There have even been traces of vinegar found in ancient Egyptian tombs dating as far back as 3000 B.C.! Discover how this one simple household staple is worth more than gold. Learn its many uses and how to make your own. Here are some of the many reasons why you should never be without vinegar. 1. Disinfect wood cutting boards. 2. Soothe a sore throat; use 1 tsp of vinegar per glass of water, then gargle. 3. Fight dandruff; after shampooing, rinse hair with vinegar and 2 cups of warm water. 4. Remove warts; apply daily a 50/50 solution of cider vinegar and glycerin until they’re gone. 5. Cure an upset stomach; drink 2 tsp apple cider vinegar in one cup of water. 6. Polish chrome. 7. Keep boiled eggs from cracking; add 2 tbsp to water before boiling. 8. Clean deposits from fish tanks. 9. Remove urine stains from carpet. 10. Keep fleas off dogs; add a little vinegar to the dog’s drinking water. 11. Keep car windows from frosting up; use a solution of 3 oz. vinegar to 1 oz. water. 12. Clean dentures; soak overnight in vinegar and then brush. 13. Get rid of lint in clothes; add 0.5 cup vinegar to rinse cycle. 14. Remove grease from suede. 15. Kill grass on sidewalks and driveways. 16. Make wool blankets softer; add 2 cups distilled vinegar to rinse cycle. 17. Remove skunk odor from a dog; rub fur with full strength vinegar and rinse. 18. Freshen wilted vegetables; soak them in 1 tbsp vinegar and a cup of water. 19. Dissolve mineral deposits in drip coffee makers, water related appliances and water pipes descaling (video) 20. Deodorize drains; pour a cup down the drain once a week, let sit for 30 minutes, then rinse. 21. Use as a replacement for a lemon; 0.25 tsp vinegar substitutes for 1 tsp of lemon juice. 22. Make rice fluffier; add 1 tsp of vinegar to water once it begins to boil. 23. Prevent grease build-up in ovens; wipe oven with cleaning rag soaked in distilled vinegar and water. 24. Kill germs; mix a 50-50 solution of vinegar and water in a spray bottle. 25. Clean a clogged shower head.; pour vinegar into a zip-lock bag and hang it around the shower head. let it soak overnight to remove any mineral deposits. 26. Shine patent leather. 27. Remove the moldy smell from laundry that has been left in the washer too long; pour 1 cup of vinegar in with the load and rewash it. 28. Make propane lantern wicks burn longer/brighter; soak them in vinegar for 3 hours, let dry. 29. Act as an air freshener. 30. Soften paint brushes; soak in hot vinegar then rinse with soapy water. 31. Remove old, outdated, or unwanted bumper stickers and decals; simply cover them with vinegar-soaked cloth for several minutes. 32. Prolong the life of fresh-cut flowers; use 2 tbsp of vinegar and 3 tbsp of sugar per quart of warm water 33. Prevent Mildew; Wipe down shower walls with a vinegar solution. 34. Soften calloused feet; soak your feet in a mixture 50/50 mixture of vinegar and water for 30 minutes then scrub them with a pumice stone. The dead skin should slough off easily. 35. Treat Acne; start with a solution of organic apple cider vinegar and water at a ratio of 1:8, apply the toner to blemishes and leave on a minimum of 2 minutes. 36. Fertilizer 37. Fixative for dying clothing and DIY Ink. 38. Removes Body Odor Make/Grow Your Own Vinegar Anything that will ferment (turns to alcohol) will, eventually, turn to vinegar. Make a punch from anything containing sugar (berries, apples, grapes, etc.). Let it ferment, then leave it in the open air for a few weeks and it will turn to vinegar. Resources: Uses and Science of Vinegar [Reference Link]

[11-Cs Basic Emergency Kit] [14-Point Emergency Preps Checklist] [Immediate Steps to Take When Disaster Strikes] [Learn to be More Self-Sufficient] [The Ultimate Preparation] [P4T Main Menu]

This blog is partially funded by Affiliate Program Links and Private Donations. Thank you for your support.

[atplblog]

Price: [price_with_discount] (as of [price_update_date] - Details) [ad_1] Product Description Welcome To SHARKY All Purpose Usage Best microfiber cloth for cleaning glass surfaces, Countertops and appliances, Automotive Surfaces, Gym equipment and Furniture. Home & Kitchen Use Our microfiber cloths are best for multipurpose usage. They can be used for kitchen cleaning and home cleaning purposes. You can clean laptops, cups, plates, kitchen floors, furniture and car. Benefits 1. Effective Cleaning: Picks up dirt, dust, and grime easily, leaving surfaces clean and streak-free. 2. Absorbent: Can hold up to 7-10 times its weight in water, making it perfect for cleaning spills and messes. 3. Gentle: Soft and gentle on surfaces, reducing the risk of scratching or damaging them. 4. Quick-Drying: Reduces the risk of bacterial growth and makes it easy to store and transport. Effective Cleaning Efficient for picking up dust and dirt from surfaces and appliances. Space-Saving They are compact and take up less storage space then other types of cloths. Everyday use Can be used on a everyday basis with or without any cleaning solution as per requirement. Versatile Cleaning Solution: SHARKY Microfiber Cloths are perfect for a variety of tasks including cleaning kitchen utensils, home appliances, windows, mirrors, and more. Their versatile design makes them ideal for multiple surfaces, from delicate electronics like laptops to tough grime on cars and bikes. Super Absorbent & Lint-Free: Made from high-quality microfiber, these cloths offer exceptional absorbency and are completely lint-free. They efficiently capture and trap dust, dirt, and grime, ensuring a spotless, streak-free finish every time. Eco-Friendly & Reusable: Say goodbye to disposable paper towels with these eco-friendly, reusable cleaning cloths. They are machine washable and designed for long-lasting use, making them a cost-effective and environmentally conscious choice for your cleaning needs. Soft & Scratch-Free: The ultra-soft microfiber material is gentle on all surfaces, preventing scratches and damage. Ideal for cleaning delicate items such as mirrors, screens, and polished surfaces without leaving any streaks or residues. Quick-Drying & Durable: These quick-drying microfiber cloths resist shrinkage and maintain their effectiveness even after multiple washes. Durable and easy to store, they are perfect for both home use and on-the-go cleaning tasks, ensuring reliable performance with every use. [ad_2]

[batteryhome]

How to clean a laptop screen without scratching it

Laptop screens will attract dirt, dust, and grime — that’s just a fact of life. Whether you’re using one of the best 2-in-1 laptops and want to clean off your fingerprints from the touchscreen or you use one of the best laptops and barely touch the display but have somehow gotten food or dirt on it, the cleaning process isn’t necessarily intuitive.

You’ll likely have lots of questions about it. Do you need a special cleaning fluid? How hard should you rub? What do you rub the screen with? Even using water to clean a laptop screen isn’t necessarily completely safe, due to minerals. So join us as we list our favorite tools for each type of yuck removal and teach you how to clean a laptop screen without inflicting damage.People who wear glasses or own a camera know about this little tool all too well. After all, it’s the best way to clean a camera lens or eyeglasses.

Designed to remove dust and debris without producing lint or scratching delicate surfaces, microfiber cloths are the best place to start when cleaning a laptop screen.

Warning: Absolutely do not use a paper towel or tissue. They might seem soft when blowing your nose, but they are extremely rough on scratch-prone displays.

Step 1: Shut down your laptop. Not only is it safer, but having a blank screen can help you see dust.

Step 2: Pressing gently on the display, use a microfiber cloth to wipe in one direction. Don’t scrub or wipe in circles, as this could damage the display or just move the dust particles around.

Step 3: Continue wiping across the display until it’s dust-free.

What about using a duster? This is also a safe way to remove dust if the coating is extremely light. Avoid feather-style products, which simply push dust into a cloud. Instead, find one that collects dust, like the dusters made by Swiffer. If using a Swiffer duster, remember to turn off your laptop before using it.

There’s no set method for removing dust, though you may want to move in an X pattern from top to bottom.

Sometimes you’ll end up with more than dust on your display. Instead of rubbing at it with your microfiber cloth to no avail — and potentially dirtying the cloth in the process — you can use a damp sponge instead.

What you need: A brand new household sponge. Distilled, deionized, or filtered water. Warning: Absolutely avoid standard tap water. Unseen minerals can scratch your display.

Step 1: Shut down your laptop and unplug it from its power source. If possible, remove the battery.

Note: If you’re worried about potential drips falling onto your keyboard, place something light over the keys that won’t absorb liquid.

Step 2: Wet the sponge with water and wring it out to eliminate drips.

Step 3: Use the sponge to gently wipe the screen’s affected area. Watch for drips and clean them up immediately.

Step 4: Once the area is clean, wait for the display to completely dry before closing the lid or using your machine.

If the cloth and sponge methods failed to clean your laptop’s screen, it’s time for a safe screen-cleaning spray. However, you can’t use just any substance. Specific chemicals scratch the surface even if you’re using a microfiber cloth.

Avoid these substances at all cost:

Acetone Ammonia Ethyl acid Ethyl alcohol Methyl alcohol Methyl chloride Surface cleaners Toluene Window cleaners Any other corrosive substance You can still purchase third-party cleaners, but they absolutely must not include the chemicals listed above. Alternatively, you can create a cleaner using the following:

50% distilled water and 50% white vinegar 50% distilled water and 50% isopropyl alcohol 100% distilled water and a drop of dish detergent Notice: As you can see, you can use alcohol to clean a laptop screen, but it must be isopropyl alcohol, not methyl or ethyl.

Step 1: Turn your laptop off and unplug it from its charger. If you’re able, also remove the battery to prevent any electrical issues.

Note: If you’re worried about potential drips falling onto your keyboard, place something light over the keys. A material that won’t absorb liquid is your best bet.

Step 2: Pour or spray your chosen cleaning fluid onto a microfiber cloth. Be sure the fabric isn’t wet, just damp. Never spray cleaning fluid directly onto your screen. Even though they evaporate quickly, applying liquid to your screen is a sure way to damage it.

Step 3: Gently rub the cloth over the affected area. Rub in small circles to avoid streaks. Don’t press too hard; otherwise, you could displace the liquid crystal molecules and permanently distort the screen.

Step 4: Repeat this process until the screen is completely free of moisture. Also check the keyboard and any attached hardware, like a mouse or anything connected to the USB ports, to make sure there is no liquid pooling on them.

Step 5: As an additional precaution, leave the screen to air dry for half an hour. Once it’s dry, you can close it and turn it on.

We put our notebooks through a lot on a day-to-day basis. If you eat and drink while you’re working, you’re more than likely leaving little bits of your food behind on the screen, keyboard, and in any other crevices. We owe it to our computers to keep them clean. Following all the steps outlined in this guide should help make your laptop look a little less homely.

When you’ve done that, maybe it’s time to clean your laptop keyboard. And if you’re leaving the computer switched off for a while, take the chance to clean your laptop fans.

[aurafms]

Essential Cleaning Supplies Every Janitorial Service Should Have

Running a successful janitorial service requires not only hard work and dedication but also the right tools and supplies. Having the proper cleaning supplies ensures high-quality results while promoting safety and efficiency in your operations.

First and foremost, cleaning chemicals are essential. An all-purpose cleaner is versatile and effective for various surfaces, making it a must-have in any cleaning kit. Opt for eco-friendly options that are safe for both the environment and your clients. Disinfectants are also crucial for sanitizing surfaces, especially in high-touch areas like doorknobs, light switches, and restrooms. It’s important to choose products that effectively combat a broad spectrum of germs and viruses. Additionally, a streak-free glass cleaner is vital for maintaining windows and mirrors. Look for a product that can tackle tough stains without damaging tinted glass. Different types of flooring require specific care, so having dedicated floor cleaners for hardwood, tile, and carpeted surfaces is necessary.

Cleaning tools are just as important as the chemicals themselves. Microfiber cloths are excellent for dusting and wiping surfaces without leaving lint or scratches, and they are reusable, making them a more environmentally friendly option. Investing in high-quality mops is crucial, as different types are suited for various flooring. Traditional string mops and flat mops each have their applications, so consider having both. Sturdy buckets, preferably with wringers, enhance efficiency. A good broom is essential for sweeping up debris, and heavy-duty options can handle both indoor and outdoor tasks. Scrub brushes with different bristle types are necessary for tackling tough stains on various surfaces, while sponges and scouring pads are perfect for scrubbing dishes, countertops, and other surfaces without causing damage.

Personal protective equipment (PPE) should never be overlooked. Latex or nitrile gloves protect staff hands from harsh chemicals and contaminants, so having both disposable and reusable options is ideal. Masks help safeguard against dust, allergens, and fumes from cleaning chemicals, with N95 masks being particularly useful when dealing with strong disinfectants. Safety goggles are essential for protecting the eyes from splashes, especially when using potent cleaning agents.

In terms of equipment, investing in a good-quality vacuum cleaner, especially one with HEPA filters, is vital for effectively removing dust and allergens from carpets and upholstery. For deep cleaning carpets, a carpet extractor is a worthwhile investment, as it removes dirt and stains more effectively than traditional methods. Pressure washers are also valuable for outdoor cleaning tasks, effectively removing dirt and grime from surfaces like sidewalks and building exteriors.

Organizational supplies play a key role in maintaining efficiency. Cleaning carts help keep supplies organized and easily transportable, and those with compartments for chemicals, tools, and equipment are particularly useful. Labels ensure that chemicals and tools are easily identifiable, promoting safety and efficiency. Additionally, having a supply of heavy-duty trash bags is essential for efficient waste disposal.

Finally, miscellaneous supplies round out the necessary inventory. Paper towels are indispensable for quick clean-ups, and eco-friendly options that are absorbent and durable should be prioritized. If your service includes restrooms, maintaining an adequate supply of toilet paper and hand soap is crucial. Air fresheners can also help maintain a pleasant environment in the spaces you clean, leaving a lasting positive impression on your clients.

In conclusion, equipping your janitorial service with the right cleaning supplies is essential for delivering high-quality service and ensuring client satisfaction. Regularly assess your inventory and stay updated on the latest products and techniques to keep your operations running smoothly. With the right tools at your disposal, you’ll be well on your way to building a successful and reputable janitorial business. Source: https://aurafms.wordpress.com/2024/10/20/essential-cleaning-supplies-every-janitorial-service-should-have/

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How House Cleaning Services Can

Improve the Cleanliness of Your

Home

Achieving a pristine and welcoming living environment can be challenging. Luckily, there are many Sydney house cleaning services that can help. They offer a wide range of customised cleaning solutions that are tailored to your specific needs.

A clean living space is crucial to your health. Dust particles, pet hair, pollen, and other pollutants settle on hard surfaces and can trigger allergies and asthma.

A well-thought-out cleaning schedule

It can be overwhelming to keep up with household chores and maintain a pristine living space. However, by following a cleaning process, homeowners can spruce up their homes in no time.

The first step of a budget end of lease cleaning Sydney process is to dust and vacuum surfaces. Dust particles, pet dander and other allergens settle on hard surfaces and pollute indoor air quality. They can also trigger health issues such as eye irritation, headaches and respiratory diseases.

Make a cleaning schedule that divides chores into weekdays and pays attention to one area at a time. For example, clean kitchens on Monday, choose a few bedrooms on Tuesday, and tackle living areas on Thursday. Keeping up with quick daily tasks and weekly cleaning sessions makes it easier to complete big cleaning jobs. It can also reduce clutter in compact Sydney apartments, which make spaces feel dirty even when their surfaces are clean. Invest in a long-handle bendable duster to reach high spots like light fixtures and ceiling fans.

Clean windows and glass surfaces

One of the most important aspects of a home cleaning is sparkling windows and glass surfaces. Indoor glass surfaces are prone to fingerprints, grease (particularly in kitchens), dust and other debris, while exterior windows get dirty from outdoor pollutants, bird/insect droppings, and so on. Hence, it is necessary to clean them regularly.

It is best to start the cleaning process with a thorough dusting using a soft microfiber cloth or electrostatic duster. Next, prepare an effective cleaning solution by mixing a specialised window cleaner or mild dishwashing liquid with water in a bucket. Dip your lint-free cloth or squeegee into the solution and wash the surface of each window pane, starting from the top and working your way down. Rinse well to ensure there is no soap residue left behind.

Regular maintenance of windows and glass surfaces helps reduce dirt build-up between professional cleaning services. Moreover, it helps keep your living spaces healthy by eliminating harmful allergens that can collect in the form of dust, grit, and grime on glass surfaces.

Clean carpets and upholstered furniture

Carpets and upholstered furniture make your living space look beautiful and comfortable, but they can also be sources of dirt, dust and stains. Cleaning them regularly is essential to keep them in good condition and extend their lifespan. However, vacuuming alone won’t be able to remove embedded dirt particles and stubborn stains.

Professional cleaners have the tools and knowledge needed to clean even the most stubborn stains from your upholstery. They use safe, effective chemicals and techniques that won’t damage your furniture or fabrics. In addition, they can clean even hard-to-reach places that are usually overlooked by homeowners.

Keeping up with regular housework can be challenging, especially for busy families in Sydney. However, with a streamlined process, it is possible to keep your home in tip-top shape without sacrificing other important family obligations. Miracle Maid offers hourly-based, regular cleaning services in Sydney that can help you stay on top of your chores. Their professional cleaners follow a standard checklist to ensure your house is cleaned properly, and they can even assist you with end of lease cleaning for tenants looking to get their bond back.

Maintain a dust-free living space

While it’s difficult to maintain a dust-free living space, it’s possible to improve the cleanliness of your home. House cleaning Sydney services can help you achieve this goal by performing a thorough job and using professional-grade equipment. They’ll work from top to bottom, sweeping and vacuuming floors and surfaces, dusting and wiping surfaces, cleaning cabinets, sanitizing bathrooms and kitchens, and more.

They’ll also perform a deep cleaning service, targeting those areas that are neglected over time and can cause dirt to build up. This is a great way to prevent the build-up of bacteria and allergens in your home.

When choosing a house cleaning company, it’s important to find one that can meet your needs and budget. Look for a company with good customer reviews and a solid reputation. You should also be sure to communicate clearly with the cleaners about your expectations. This will ensure that they’re able to provide you with the best possible cleaning service.

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7 Tips for Cleaning Windows Without Lint or Fibers One of the most frustrating challenges in window cleaning is dealing with lint, fibers, or other residues left behind on the glass. To achieve a truly streak-free and crystal-clear finish, it’s essential to use the right materials and techniques. Here’s how you can clean your windows without leaving any lint or fibers behind. 1.

[tintusacharlotral]

Cleaning Dos and Don'ts for Window Tinting: Best Practices You Should Know

Proper maintenance is essential for preserving the clarity, functionality, and longevity of window tinting. Whether installed for privacy, UV protection, or energy efficiency, window tinting requires specific cleaning methods to avoid damage and maintain effectiveness. Here’s a comprehensive guide on the dos and don’ts of cleaning window tinting Raleigh NC to ensure optimal performance and appearance over time.

Dos

1. Use Gentle Cleaning Solutions:

Opt for mild, non-abrasive cleaning solutions such as diluted dish soap or a designated window cleaner recommended by the tint manufacturer. These solutions effectively remove dirt and grime without damaging the tinted surface.

2. Use Soft, Non-Abrasive Materials:

Choose soft materials for cleaning, such as a microfiber cloth, soft sponge, or rubber squeegee. These materials prevent scratching or scuffing the tinting film while ensuring thorough cleaning.

3. Start with Dry Cleaning:

Before applying any cleaning solution, start by using a dry cloth or soft brush to gently remove dust and loose debris from the window surface. This minimizes the risk of scratching the tint during the cleaning process.

4. Follow Proper Technique:

Wet the cleaning cloth or sponge with the cleaning solution and gently wipe the tinted surface in a circular motion. Avoid applying excessive pressure, especially on corners or edges, to prevent peeling or lifting of the tinting film.

5. Rinse Thoroughly:

After cleaning, rinse the window thoroughly with clean water to remove any remaining cleaning solution or residue. Proper rinsing ensures a streak-free finish and maintains the clarity of the tinted surface.

6. Dry with a Lint-Free Cloth:

Use a lint-free cloth or microfiber towel to dry the window after cleaning. Drying with a soft cloth prevents water spots and ensures a clean, polished look without leaving behind lint or fibers.

Don'ts

1. Avoid Harsh Chemicals:

Do not use harsh chemicals, abrasive cleaners, ammonia-based products, or vinegar solutions for cleaning window tinting. These substances can damage the tinted film, causing discoloration, peeling, or degradation over time.

2. Avoid Rough or Abrasive Materials:

Window tinting services Raleigh NC suggest not to use rough materials such as paper towels, abrasive pads, or scouring brushes for cleaning tinted windows. These materials can scratch or scrape the tinting film, compromising its effectiveness and appearance.

3. Avoid Sharp Objects:

Refrain from using sharp objects or tools to remove stubborn stains or debris from window tinting. Scratching or puncturing the film with sharp edges can lead to irreparable damage and necessitate costly repairs or replacements.

4. Skip Abrasive Cleaning Techniques:

Avoid using abrasive cleaning techniques such as scrubbing vigorously or using excessive force to remove dirt or stains from tinted windows. Gentle, consistent cleaning motions are sufficient for effective cleaning without risking damage.

5. Don’t Clean in Direct Sunlight:

Avoid cleaning tinted windows in direct sunlight or during hot weather conditions. High temperatures can cause cleaning solutions to dry quickly, leaving streaks or residue on the tinted surface.

6. Don’t Use High-Pressure Water Streams:

Refrain from using high-pressure water streams or power washers to clean tinted windows. The forceful spray can penetrate through the edges of the film, causing it to peel or lift from the glass surface.

By following these dos and don’ts, homeowners can effectively clean their tinted windows without compromising the integrity of the tinted film. Gentle cleaning with appropriate materials and solutions is key to preserving the clarity and effectiveness of your window tinting investment. Talk to the experts to know more about the window tinting Raleigh NC prices today. The author is working at a recognized company offering quality and durable residential and commercial window tinting. He has years’ of experience in this field of work. Visit https://tintusacharlotte.com/window-tinting-raleigh/

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How to Avoid Common Residential Window Cleaning Mistakes in Geelong?

It's crucial to keep your windows clean not just for the appearance of your home, but also to allow more natural light in. This light not only brightens your home but also creates a warm and inviting atmosphere. However, many homeowners make mistakes during the cleaning process, resulting in spots and potential damage. If you want to know about the common mistakes many make during residential window cleaning in Geelong, then you must check out the points explained in detail below.

Selecting the Incorrect Cleaning Products

One of the most common blunders is using inappropriate cleaning products. Harsh chemicals can damage window seals and frames, leading to costly repairs. It is best to opt for a mild, eco-friendly cleaner. You can also create your own solution using water and vinegar.

Choosing the Wrong Tools

The tools you use play a crucial role in achieving a clean finish. Using paper towels or rags may lead to lint and streaks. Instead, consider investing in high-quality microfiber cloths or squeegees with a rubber blade. These tools, when used correctly, can effectively remove water without leaving streaks, making your cleaning process more efficient and your windows spotless.

Neglecting the Window Frames and Sills

Many owners focus solely on the glass, neglecting the frames and sills, which can accumulate dirt, dust, and mould. It is vital to always clean these areas first with a damp cloth or a vacuum to remove loose debris. This step prevents dirt from dripping onto the freshly cleaned glass.

Forgetting to Rinse

Failing to rinse off the cleaning solution appropriately can leave residues on the glass. After cleaning, use clean water to rinse the window. This helps release any leftover cleaner and ensures a streak-free finish.

Skipping Regular Maintenance

Regular cleaning helps control the buildup of grime, which can be unsightly and even cause damage to your windows over time. Depending on your weather conditions, set a schedule for cleaning your windows, typically every 1-3 months. This will help in maintaining clarity and extend the lifespan of your windows.

You should also avoid dish soap and ammonia-based cleaners, which might damage the windows, etc. If you think managing such a task is tough, then hiring the experts of a renowned window cleaning company in Geelong is the best decision you can easily make.