#classic case of i can treat u better than she can

[sparklingcid3r]

dally and soda were looking at each other’s relationships like damn bitch u live like this? unaware that they too lived like that

[prometheanglory]

FUYVUVUY i may uh...went a lil overboard so if you wanna skip some honestly?UNDERSTABLE LMAO BUT 💢🥞🍰🌙🕷️🌹🙉🙈🙊🌏🪤✂️🎡🎀♥️💙💔 for um Lola,guts n maybe hahaha chase def not bcuz I'm a simp for two n the other one UUUUH ANYWAY SORRY IF IS A LOT KISSY HAVE A GOOD DAY ON UR SPECIAL DAY

THANK YOU CHOCO FOR THE BDAY WISHES I KISS YOUR KIND FACE. IM MORE THAN HAPPY TO FEED U ON TJIS FINE (belated now that im posting it) DAY >:)

also this got so long but i wanfed to answer it all bc im impulsive . HOPEFULLY I DIDNT FORGET ANY

💢 ANGER - what are some habits they have that will take some getting used to?

chase and guts have the very similar issue of locking people out of their lives and just? never actually telling ppl what’s up with them if smth’s the matter at all. chase is 10x more secretive and defensive than guts, but guts is a lot more abrasive when it comes to getting people off his tail.

chase is also a very prolific ‘ghoster’ of sorts — has a very prolific tendency to just disappear for a while out of nowhere, be it a few hours or a few days in some cases. never really tells people what he was doing or where he went, if he even went anywhere or if he was avoiding/ignoring them… and doesn’t even recognize that it’s kinda rude to randomly drop ppl for extended periods at a time and to come waltzing back in (if ever). by recognize i mean ‘acknowledge that hes in the wrong’ and not ‘does not know he’s wrong’

guts on the other hand — while not much of a ghoster in the same sense chase is, he is pretty aggressively antisocial. he doesn’t hang out, usually declines all invitations, never initiates or reciprocates attempts to maintain relationships, and has a tendency to actively push people out of his life.

lola is by far, one of the most touchy-feely and strong-handed ppl in my roster. she has a bit of a tendency to muscle people into doing things, and an even worse tendency of talking over others. she can be a bit of a bully when it comes to her jokes and can overstep quite a few personal boundaries when it comes down to it. it’s not quite out of a place of immaturity or naivety, so it comes off as pretty malicious.

🥞 PANCAKE - what is their comfort breakfast?

chase -> not much of a sweets guy, but he likes the classic american breakfast platter as a rare treat. you know like. pancakes, sausage, eggs, syrup, bacon. nice.

guts -> feel like he doesn’t eat breakfast much as a default, but baked eggs with sausage…… or any leftovers from the night before.

lola -> A SWEETS LOVER…. LOVER OF ALL THINGS DECADENT AS A TREAT…… she likes having soapaipilla or anything sugary.

🍰 CAKE SLICE - favourite cake flavour? are they specific about types of cakes?

chase -> something in my heart is telling me he’s a carrot cake man and i cannot ignore its call…!! he doesn’t like super heavy cakes/super sweet ones, he’s good with the basics. not a fan of icecream cakes.

guts -> if it’s a cake, he’s gonna eat it. no preference at all, but he rly enjoys the sweeter side of things. maybe go easy on the frosting bc it’s a bit of a mess, but he’ll still eat it regardless.

lola -> SOMETHING FRUITY BUT NOT TOO HEAVY ON THE SWEETNESS… a little cinnamon-y with a fruit like mango or strawberry. maybe a lemon cake. she likes tres lèches but she’s also always down for a good fruit cheesecake.

🌙 MOON - what is your oc's greatest wish? how far are they willing to go for it?

two out of three of these guys aren’t very ‘grand’ in their ambitions, and the other one purposefully leaves his wish as vague as possible. can you guess who. (it’s chase)

chase -> he wants to pave a better future, a guaranteed future. be it for himself, his friends, his family, or just other people in a situation like him — he wants something More than what they have now. the question of ‘how far he’s willing to go’ is entirely dependent on how far he can get without being questioned by the people close to him.

guts -> a very general desire to exist quietly and without much thought or disturbance. he doesn’t have that much gusto in him to ensure it happens, but he does what he can. it’s unpleasant if it won’t happen, but he really can’t fight that hard.

lola -> live big, live splendidly 😌 that’s all that matters. there’s no need to overexert yourself for grandeur when the fun exists on all corners! she’ll go as far as she feels bothered to, it’s really not that serious. don’t get so butthurt about it!

🕷️ SPIDER - what is their biggest fear? do they have any irrational / mundane fears?

chase -> grossed out by maggots, and gets a bit paranoid when his door is neither locked or closed. not rly scared of much else.

guts -> nervous about most matters related to bureaucracy. like… paperwork? permits? registering and keeping track of shit…? dear lord. also he’s mildly claustrophobic.

lola -> super horrific and gross body injury stuff, but minor bloody things are whatever. doesn’t like being chased, zombies, and or ghosts. doesn’t mind other horror clichés much.

🌹 ROSE - do they like valentines day? have they been confessed to before? have they confessed to anyone before?

chase -> very indifferent to valentines day. he has been confessed to before (for valentines day), but that was in elementary school and it didn’t really matter much to him. being confessed to nowadays is way more uncommon. hasn’t confessed to anyone before, but that’s also bc he hasn’t rly felt the need to before.

guts -> also indifferent to valentines day, but NRC days wise he dreads it a bit. he’s gonna be swamped on that day for work…. but it’s not like he has a life, so why not. he’s been flirted with before, but not incredibly seriously. also has never asked anyone out just bc its not rly his place go ask.

lola -> a lover of most things pink and heart-shaped, she must love valentines day like it is her flesh and blood! there’s so much cute stuff going on around those days, how could you hate it? lola gets asked out on an infrequent basis, but that’s also largely because lola tends to make the first move anytime someone catches her eye.

🙈 SEE-NO-EVIL - whats a side of your oc that they don't want to show other people?

chase -> would prefer that ppl don’t catch onto some of his more meticulous or malicious patterns, bc it’s not like he’s going out of his way to be despicable but he knows some parts of himself are definitely not . healthy. he’d prefer for the ppl who he cares about to not have to interact with that aspect of him.

guts -> tbh. ppl have already seen the worst parts of him and he’s pretty sure his current self is no better, so there’s nothing rly to hide about himself.

lola -> nothing really…? she’s not really ashamed of herself and thinks most, if not all, parts of herself are pretty admirable, so why tuck it away? take a gander at will 😎

🙊 SPEAK-NO-EVIL - what is something your oc will refuse to stay quiet about?

chase -> the funny thing about him is that he’ll stay quiet even about the things he cares about. it’s not like being outspoken was ever a requirement for him to do the things he wanted to do. he’s always done his best work behind closed doors.

guts -> the middleman between these two fr. he’ll take a lot of bullshit, but he’s always been very particular of where he stakes himself — and even if it’s not the most vocal protest, guts tries his best to put himself between ‘civilian’ types (even if they are ‘troublemakers’) and certain settings he knows they don’t belong in. there’s nothing to be gained from picking fights with either side.

lola -> it could be the slightest inconvenience and lola wouldn’t take it sitting down. not to say she’d flip a table over a minor annoyance, but she’s a lady of snide comments and more provocations that are always itching to come to the surface.

🙉 HEAR-NO-EVIL - what is the worse thing your oc could hear from someone?

ALL THREE OF THEM HAVE CONCERNINGLY THICK SKIN. ITS A BIT DIFFICULT TO THINK OF SMTH THAT’D STRIKE A REALLY FOUL CHORD IN THEM BUT…

chase -> ITS GOTTA BE SMTH THAT RLY STRIPS HIM OF HIS DIGNITY… not that he’d burst a vein over being called a hick or broke, but i think he’d get pretty pissed off if someone, in any way, talks down on the circumstances of his birth or his foster home history.

guts -> not that he’ll get furious and start throwing shit and having an emo meltdown or anything if anyone calls him this (disclaimer pt 2) but it’s still pretty shit for guts if anyone can recognize him as a finn. and it’s even deeper shit if they call him brutus.

lola -> not that it’s hurtful, but it does piss her off (disclaimer pt 3)— she has never hated anything more than being called baby girl and everything adjacent to it. call her a scavenger or whatever, that’s fine but for the love of god….! WHO IS KITTEN? ANGEL BABY? DOLL? DADDY’S PRINCESS….????? IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE HER??? TO BE LOLA????😨😨😨😨😨🤢🤮🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮

🌏 EARTH - will they give up the world for someone they love? is this decision easy for them?

chase -> no. not really. in terms of semantics, i guess he comes close to it but…? at the end of the day, pretty resound no. as important as they may be to him, they could never be so important that they could take from him. it’s an easy decision for him, but i feel some would wish it was a little harder if he rly did care that much :,-)

guts -> maybe? he’s not capable enough to give them the entire world, but he could try and give them his world. not like he’s rly been doing much with it — and it’s not exactly like he’s not used to giving his shit up. it’s a bit of a rough choice, it’s not like he’s a masochist with a metaphorical death wish, but he doesn’t really have much else outside of them, so why not.

lola -> not the world, no way! it’s not like she doesn’t care about them enough to not sacrifice smth big but like, does she rly care thaaaaaat much? the world is kinda important yknow, she needs her life to have room for improvement too — it’s not going to be all for her s/o.

🪤 MOUSE TRAP - what will always lure them into certain danger? a loved one in danger? a promise of something they are always searching for?

chase -> never the type to act recklessly or go in blind — if he’s doing something dangerous then it’s entirely bc he has something to gain. a favor, some sort of leverage… proving a point is viable for him too, but he still needs something directly out of it. he has people he cares about for sure, people he’d get into some deal of trouble for but to go out of his way to risk himself needs a little bit more than just his affection.

guts -> i mean, he’s always been a bit of a meatshield. for azul, for the finns, for… whoever is convincing enough or just happens fo be in the right place. not the type to go prancing into danger unknowingly, but if he feels like someone’s got leverage over him then he’s obligated to go in wherever they’re telling him to go.

lola -> well she’s not always the sharpest tool in the shed so it’s not like waltzing into danger is foreign to her. party girls live as party girls do…. and keeping an eye out for things is tough! she’ll typically go in for her own material gain, more often than not. food to eat, cash in her pocket, fun in her brain — whatever! self-preservation is only important when it’s a situation she can’t guarantee some means of escape or surrender.

✂️ SCISSORS - what is the "last straw" for them to cut someone out of their life? how easily do they let go of people?

chase -> the moment he deems them a lost cause is when he’s cutting them out immediately. the exact definition of ‘lost cause’ is pretty flexible, but more often than not — it means that they’re not likely to believe him or follow his lead anymore; they overstepped and either got too close to a grisly truth about him of tried too hard to get that truth out of him; and or he just doesn’t think they’re worth any effort investing in. he seems to let go easily enough and in most cases, he’s content with just brushing it under the rug. but he never forgets, and he probably was lying about forgiving.

guts -> a bit hard for guts to cut people out if they’re in close with him. it’s coming largely from a place of cowardice, that he really doesn’t trust himself enough to think he’s doing the right thing even if he’s been mistreated prior. it’d really take a lot of damage for guts to really feel that he should run, but that damage would also have to extend to other people for him to feel more secure in his choice of bailing. he doesn’t let go easily, he’s always a bit too wary of them and what they’ve done after he gets out — and it’ll likely stay like that for good long while.

lola -> she leaves the moment she knows they don’t respect her enough. it’s fine to not take her so seriously, it’s fine to treat her like the irresponsible one — but when the jokes get a little too close to treating her like she’s expendable, there’s gonna be a problem. she’ll sort it out if she can, but more often than not she’s fine with burning bridges. she doesn’t cling much onto the thought after she cuts them out, but she neither forgives nor forgets.

🎡 FERRIS WHEEL - are they someone who wants to kiss at the top of the ferris wheel?

chase -> no, not really. not much of a kissing or pda guy…. and doesn’t really get why people think the ferris wheel is so special, but he’s fine with enjoying the ferris wheel views.

guts -> no… he’s way more bashful than chase about pda. but also, why at the top of the ferris wheel. was any other spot not romantic enough. also it’s a bit too small for him to feel comfortable.

lola -> omg yeth 😋 she’s down for anything corny or new — she’d kiss at the peak of a roller coaster if she got the chance. she thinks it’s cute! pda isn’t a must for her, but you gotta at least cooperate with her demands (of give her a kiss rn)

🎀 RIBBON - how would they fit into other worlds / aus? what aus would you like to try out? what fictional world would they fit / not fit into?

I HAVE SO MANY AUS…. SO MANY….. and tbh, my method of swapping to fit charas into aus just preserves the core of their character so that they can fit pretty much anywhere.

i don’t have any hard no’s for aus aside from hargle pooter, but i’m a bitch for any and all aus outside of that B)

aus i think would be fun to explore for all of them… i’ll give two for now :-)

wild west:

chase -> cattle rustler (former miner) — breaking your back for the big man with nothing to gain but black in your lungs…. maybe it’ll push men towards less savory deals.

guts -> carriage driver (former gunslinger) — the highlife of crime isn’t really for everyone… maybe it’s time to pass the reigns off to someone else and just do some sight-seeing… (or just getting roped into more people’s trouble)

lola -> bounty hunter (former bronco rider) — the exhilaration of bucking in the same old circle can sometimes be rekindled by breaking out entirely and dedicating your life to roughhousing for a hearty, unpromised buck.

soul eater:

chase -> rifle meister: a skilled marksman with a startlingly wide range of abilities within demon weapons… however he proves to be an incredibly capricious soul to resonate with (swinging between unremarkable and totally incompatible) and being an even worse partner, his hardheadedness often getting in the way. exhibits some mastery of soul menace. despite his talents, he keeps an astoundingly low profile within the academy.

guts -> demon machine gun: a cumbersome and destructive weapon, but pretty simple when you actually think about it. shocking to most, he’s not a challenge to synchronize with at all (accredited to his person’s stability and predictability) — however outside of presented circumstances required for partnerships, he’s not that chummy. a bit of a problem child in regards to his grades and performance, but he’s def not the worst weapon out there at least.

lola -> bat meister: a simple and unruly weapon for a straightforward gal ❤️ another fellow user of soul menace, however she’s a lot less lethal than chase is… however she makes up for a lot of that through quick wits and a great deal of force (and technique, don’t worry). pretty adaptable for a meister, however it’s easy to fall out of sync with her if ur not paying enough attention to her beat.

❤️ RED HEART - their love language(s)?

chase -> service, quality time

guts -> service, gift-giving

lola -> affirmation, physical touch

💙 BLUE HEART - do they miss their s/o easily? how do they act when their s/o isn't around?

chase -> no not really 🥲 he acts pretty much the same when his partner isn’t around — regardless of whether he’s with ppl he likes or not, the change isn’t all that grand aside from some minor shift in how sociable he is? aka if he’s with his s/o then he’s a little more willing to entertain their conversations, but if it’s anyone else then it’s more like talking to a scarecrow.

guts -> not easily, but he can get worried? if they’re away for a time-frame longer than like… 2 weeks, then he has a mild tendency to zone out briefly before he snaps back (and slips back in), but after that 3 weeks mark he should be largely functional and normal again. he’s the same as chase in terms of being unsociable and mildly intimidating, except he’s much more… awkward without his s/o as a buffer.

lola -> sure, if you could call it missing them? as affectionate as she is, she’s not incredibly clingy. she’s curious about them, maybe misses a few hugs here and there, and of course she’s keeping them in her thoughts, but if they’re not gonna be missing for months on end or something… what loss is there to mourn exactly? modern technology exists, she could just call them! she’s exactly the same without her s/o around, however you can bet that there isn’t a single chance she’ll skip out on mentioning her s/o.

💔 BROKEN HEART - what could their partner do that would absolutely break their heart?

chase -> let him down: he’s not the type to entrust his faith so freely, even if he should trust them. it hurts all the more when someone close to him begins to falter and fall through the bare minimum of expectations he set on them. it’s nothing to make him break down in tears but it makes him shut them out a lot harsher than before.

guts -> sell him out: ok this ones a bit hard to pinpoint but for the most part he does Not care what happens to him to a certain point but the moment it registers that he’s been used (and is still being used) and is considered expendable. smth abt that, he still prolly won’t find the heart to leave but it still hurts him. smth abt how the finn family has ways of making its rounds back into his life even if his partner is entirely unaffiliated :,)

lola -> demean her: she’s got tough skin but a line that she refuses to have crossed is in regards to her personhood. she is not to be coerced, devalued, or shrunken! she’ll take plenty of pointed jokes, but the moment those ‘jokes’ get way too comfortable about how dumb or useless she is, or how bratty or bimbo-ish she is — she’s gonna have a few choice words with her partner about respect ^_^ (🤭)

[bbugyu]

how seokmin knew

a journey with yoon jeonghan, lee seokmin, and you.

from the second seokmin first saw you, he thought you were far too good to be true, and he hadn't even gotten to learn the best parts of you yet.

prelude | part one | part two | part three | epilogue

wc.8888 | fluff, smut, courtship, oh jeez where do i even begin, the beginning i guess, polyamory, fem reader, musician!seokmin sugar daddy!jeonghan escort!reader, threesome, fingering, oral (everyone receiving), creampie, cumpla (like gunpla but with cum), (sorry), (but seriously lots of cumplay), overstim, switch!seok dom!han switch!reader, phone sex, snuck in a babygirl, hell yeah fighting for dominance, let's talk BOUNDARIES, hi mingyu, sorry but seokmin being a special guest is hot as hell, the required listening for the last scene is the album "new edition (1984)" by new edition (which is a real lp i own and listened to while writing it)

hELLOO!! welcome to my poly seokhan au! i have been neck deep in this universe for weeks now and i am finally releasing it in three parts! i will be posting today (obvi), tomorrow, and friday at noon pst, plus a little bonus epilogue whenever i finish it! today is all about seokmin and how he fell in love. i really poured a lot of myself into this one, between the poly reader and the obsession with architecture and the record collection (three fun facts about me, but you get no more context), so if you like it, please let me know! i did my best to portray the relationship as realistic and as healthy as possible❣️ also this series lowkey became a “how many cameos can i naturally squeeze in” kinda piece so if you spot one u should absolutely let me know hehe. and i edited my masterlist to accommodate for serial aus, let me know what you think!

please read the prelude linked in the contents of this post! it gives important context for the beginning of this part, establishes relationships, and sets the general mood 😏

~

seokmin lived a fairly simple life. he held private piano and guitar lessons in the comfort of his apartment, vaulted ceilings and tall windows helping to bring a bright, airy, studio environment during the day that he felt suited musical lessons perfectly - not the mention the lovely acoustics the tall room provided when he sang, belting out improv musical theater riffs as he scrambled eggs for a sandwich. he genuinely found joy and pride in helping adults and children alike train their hands to achieve new heights. he also did some contract vocal lessons at an entertainment company, stopping by the studio two or three times a week to train young new hopefuls in the music industry. he wondered how different his life would have been if he had taken their path, but he enjoyed the quiet downtime in his line of work, and wouldn't trade it for anything

his simple life. he drank tea in the mornings as the sun rose over the skyline, rode the subway with his guitar bag over his shoulder and his groceries in two overstuffed ecobags, and enjoyed his days off by relaxing in his home, scribbling down lyrics and compositions on the legal pad that never left the music shelf of his upright piano. the less simple part of his life could be described simply as you.

the second time he had been summoned to accompany you, he had been at home, heating up leftover takeout and mindlessly watching some drama on a saturday evening after having gotten lunch and playfully wasting the afternoon with a friend, when he received a phone call. he answered it without giving too much thought, expecting an invite for drinks, as was usually the case when he heard from jeonghan. he put it on speaker and set his phone on his kitchen counter, leaning against it as he ate.

"hello?"

"minnie!" he had said, the smile obvious in his voice. seokmin responded with a short greeting before jeonghan continued. "are you busy tonight?"

"just watching tv," seokmin said, spoonful of fried rice in his mouth. "why? you feeling lonely?"

"something like that," jeonghan said. the architect must have been in the car, he thought briefly, hearing the static noise of wheels on pavement in the background every time he spoke. "listen, you remember y/n, yeah?"

he nearly choked. "uh, yeah. of course. did you think i would forget?"

"not really," he said matter of factly. "we're currently heading home after that exhibit opening and she's been asking about you all day. any chance you can get to my place in half an hour?"

seokmin blinked, staring at nothing as he processed. "tonight?"

a laugh. "yeah, tonight. she's been really sweet lately, i thought you could be her treat."

her treat. "right now?"

"yes," jeonghan laughed again. "right now. if it helps the decision making process, i've had my hand between her legs this whole time and she gets needier every time you talk."

seokmin swallowed harshly, imagining you squirming in the passenger seat of the car, huffing and desperate, begging for him with jeonghan's fingers curled into you. he adjusted against the counter, his pants suddenly feeling slightly tighter. "i'll get a cab."

then he heard you, your signature whiny moan as jeonghan no doubt worked you into a mess despite his even tone as he spoke. "y'hear that, sweetheart? he said yes. i'll pay for the cab when we get there. see you soon?"

"yeah," he said, eyes still unfocused. "yeah, see you soon."

after jeonghan asked you to be an angel and hang up for him, seokmin stood and looked around at his leftover fried rice and the drama that continued playing, remnants of his simple life that he found plenty enjoyable and fulfilling on its own, but fell to the shadows as you came into the light.

the cab ride felt too fast, and jeonghan's car pulled into the driveway of his luxurious home only minutes after seokmin arrived. he emerged from the door of the cab and stood in the late november air as the other car parked, the passenger door swinging open in a hurry.

"seokmin!" you squealed, heels clicking against the drive as you ran up to him in a shoulderless, long sleeved jewel toned dress that was not at all suited for the current temperature. your arms wrapped around his neck and he laughed into the hug. "i missed you."

"it's practically snowing," he chided, pulling away to wrap his coat around you, and you happily fell into his chest. he didn't stop you when you pulled his face to yours, kissing him briefly but deeply. you tasted familiar, memories of eating you out entering his mind as he thought about how jeonghan had likely made you clean his hand in the car, and despite your forwardness and his generally shy nature, it wasn't the winter air that sent chills up your spine when he muttered "i missed you, too," against your lips.

"okay, kids, get inside while i pay the nice driver," jeonghan said, holding out your coat to seokmin. he took it, draping it over your bare shoulders. you grinned at him, working your fingers between his and leading him towards a side entrance of the home.

he felt a flash of embarrassment, wondering what the cab driver must have thought about the interaction he was witnessing, but seokmin figured that he had probably seen much stranger and decided to not worry about it, especially when you were regaling the events of the evening.

"they were playing classical," you groaned, punching in the door code with the hand that wasn't fiddling with his fingers. "from a cd. at a modern art exhibit. what part of that makes sense?"

seokmin laughed. "is that why you were thinking about me?"

you smiled as he followed you through the doorway, revealing a grand kitchen with a large island countertop. he had been here before, but on halloween, when it was full of life and the counter was covered in food. "jeonghan may have let me watch some videos," you said, and seokmin felt heat rising on his neck as he thought of you asking to learn more about him in his absence. you stepped out of your heels and walked towards the large fridge as you spoke, retrieving a water bottle. "that jazz piano number you did, jeonghan said it was at a bar? that would have been so much better, especially considering the artist's vision. his stuff was so full of life, i'm honestly surprised he allowed them to do anything other than live jazz - classical was too stuffy."

"it was a commentary," jeonghan reminded you, closing the door behind him as you offered a bottle to seokmin. "juxtaposition of traditional museum atmosphere with outlandish architecture and colorful, emotional art pieces," he said, sounding rehearsed. "the music was supposed to feel stuffy compared to the visuals."

"you guys worked too hard to settle for that," you shot back. you may have held a little resentment for the fact that jeonghan hadn't even asked for your opinion on the matter, considering you were less than a year away from a degree in musical theory. "if i hear clair de lune at one of these unveilings one more time, i'm gonna tear my fucking hair out."

seokmin laughed, but jeonghan only gave you a tired chuckle, and only after you quirked an eyebrow at him. he should have known you were only acting impressed at the exhibit because you wanted seokmin around. jeonghan could be cruel, but not so cruel as to invite a friend over to make his lady's night, only to deny everyone the pleasure after he already arrived, and this was a fact about him you were completely aware of. now was your chance to act out with little to no sacrifice - the most he would do is punish you in bed, and that, you were willing to handle.

jeonghan tsked when he saw your laptop and schoolwork spread across the kitchen island. "didn't i ask you to not do this?"

you eyed the counter, noting the teasing tone he took. "not do what?"

"leave your shit in the kitchen. you have a whole room to do schoolwork in, make a mess in there," he scolded, clicking his tongue as he flipped a textbook shut.

"i work better in bright, open spaces," you said quickly. 

"i gave you a window to the sunroom."

"and i love it," you stated obviously. "and the desk you chose is nice, and the chair is super comfy, but it's still too dark in that room. it makes me want to fall asleep." you turned to the musician. "how have you been, seokmin? i haven't seen you in weeks, and jeonghan purposefully keeps secrets when you guys go out."

seokmin said close to nothing of substance as he said he was doing well and leaned against the kitchen island, focusing more on the way you shrugged the fuzzy coat off your shoulders and setting it in the counter to tuck your arms into his, wrapping them around his torso and resting your chin on his shoulder to give the man of the house a flirtatious look. jeonghan simply rolled his eyes at you with a faint smile on his face, taking off his own outer coat and going to hang it in a closet. you hummed as seokmin spoke about anything he could think of, smiling when you felt his gentle, hesitant fingers rubbing circles into the small of your back.

and that night, seokmin was perhaps too eager to secede control, allowing his friend to gently order the two of you to do whatever pleased him. currently, you were between his thighs as he laid out comfortably in jeonghan's bed, the architect fucking into you from behind as your voice went hoarse from sucking seokmin dry. his thick cock stretched your jaw to its breaking point, but your neediness for his cum on your tongue outweighed the soreness you knew you would feel the next day as you bobbed your head, your hands wrapped around what wouldn't fit. he choked, his fingers itching to reach out to you, but remembering jeonghan's firm words of no touching and gripping the sheets instead as he came into your mouth and you moaned around him. jeonghan had stopped you from swallowing completely, a hand around your throat as he pulled you against his chest, forcing your neck to crane around so he could share the treat. seokmin watched, hand involuntarily going to pump himself again despite the sensitivity, as his release dripped down both of your jaws between the feverish kisses. you whined, jeonghan continuing to thrust into you as he stole the gift seokmin gave you straight from your mouth, his fingers finding your clit, making your knees shake as he came in your pulsating cunt.

that was the first time in his life that seokmin had ever cum twice in one session, having been too turned on at the sight to even think about not having you ride his face, cum seeping out of your precious hole. too turned on by the way your fingers dug against his scalp and the way you tasted to even think about turning down jeonghan when he asked to touch him, groaning against your core as he slowly and teasingly jerked him off. too turned on by it all to even think about not cumming when he was told, fist clenching the now familiar sheets as you rolled off him, panting from the overstimulation. your face was wrecked, tearstained and flushed, as you collapsed into his side, wrapping your arms around his torso and burying your hot face in his neck, his own face not much better. jeonghan proudly announced he was off to take a shower, sucking a line of cum off his thumb before saying that you lovebirds were welcome to stay as long as you would like, fully expecting you two to continue without him as he walked to the bathroom. 

seokmin felt shy, for some reason, despite having just having taken a shower with you, and just before, having had sex with you both. you had asked him if he wanted sweats or a shirt to sleep in, saying jeonghan wouldn't mind if he borrowed some. he turned you down, but watched you tug a far too large shirt over your otherwise bare form, and let you lead him back to bed.

"it's a custom mattress," you told him, giggling as you pulled him onto the oversized bed, kneeing yourself to the center and plopping down next to where jeonghan was wasting time on his phone. you planted a kiss on his cheek and he looked up to smile at you before you turned back to seokmin. he noticed the duvet changed, and he wondered if jeonghan had swapped it out after the mess they had made on it. you maneuvered yourself under the covers, gesturing for him to join you. "c'mon," you said. "we cuddle here."

seokmin had never even considered the idea of spending the night in bed with two other people, but found it surprisingly comfortable for it being his first time.

he did a lot of firsts with you, as it turned out.

you started to text him when you were alone and bored, which was something you and jeonghan had discussed with the strict understanding that you would have open and honest talks about it frequently, and that you would let him know any time you reached out to the musician. the first time he ever had phone sex, seokmin was busy at the company he did contract work for, and he had even told you so after the first suggestive text you sent him, but that didn't stop you from sending him increasingly dirty ideas and photos, making him silence his phone and shove it in his back pocket as he tried to focus on his students. when he finally slipped away to a private bathroom, he groaned at the way you looked, laid out on a plush couch and squeezing at your own breasts, with your back arching just so, and he quickly called you to ask if you were trying to get him fired.

"maybe if you get fired, you can come work with me," you whined, fingers already teasing your slick folds just at the low tone in seokmin's voice. his mind whirring as you gasped suddenly, revealing that you had already started. "jeonghan's been too busy for me this week, please don't tell me you are, too."

seokmin's eyes squeezed shut, back hitting the bathroom wall as he pulled himself out of his pants, trying not to drop his phone from his ear as he imagined how absolutely delightful you must look in that moment. "i'm never too busy for you, baby."

jeonghan took him out to dinner. it was normal, mostly, and not the first time since seokmin had seen his dick, but he noticed the older was acting slightly different as seokmin turned the meat on the grill.

"about y/n," he said finally, and seokmin fumbled with a chunk of pork before clearing his throat.

"yeah?"

jeonghan smiled. "she hasn't said it yet, but i think she really likes you."

that made seokmin freeze, suddenly thinking about how he was at dinner with his undefined sext buddy's long term partner. "really?" he squeaked out.

"listen, i want you to know," he said, picking off some cooked meat and chewing it casually. "whatever happens between you two, i'm okay with it. she promised to keep me in the loop, and i trust her."

seokmin nodded, putting down the tongs and grabbing his chopsticks, continuing to avoid eye contact. "okay."

jeonghan laughed. "stop acting like i'm her dad. you and i are in the same relationship with her at this point."

he swallowed, a smile creeping across his face. "well, she does call you daddy."

the next time he saw you, you came to him, appearing at his apartment one early tuesday evening as his last client was leaving. he greeted you casually, but still snuck a quick kiss on your lips as he let you in, his student packing up their guitar. he took your winter coat and told you to make yourself comfortable as they finished up, telling you where the restroom was if you needed it, but in a tone that made you think he was saying it more to announce to his student that you had never been there before than for your comfort, which pulled a quiet giggle from you as he quickly organized his loose leaf sheet music into their designated folders. you watched him from the piano bench as he made short conversation with his student, accepted a check, and bid the aspiring guitarist farewell, closing the door behind them. when you were finally alone, seokmin blushed at the realization that you had been smiling at him the entire time, thinking about how his client must have thought their teacher had gotten himself a cute girlfriend.

you were less forward this time. less needy. you flirted, but not in the outright ways you had every other time seokmin saw you. you stood and joined him by a bookshelf as he put away materials, asking him about his day (quite lovely, especially with this to look forward to), what he had eaten for lunch (he'd gotten ox tail soup delivered as a celebratory meal for a student that just had their first solo piano recital that weekend), and how he managed to command authority in all his students when he always looked so darn cute (he had pitched his eyebrows at you and went "yah," but was unable to keep a straight face long enough to argue with you). you smiled, taking a baseball off the bookshelf and turning it over in your hands, and asked why he invited you over. he cleared his throat, saying he thought it'd be nice to take you out on a proper date, but faltered when your shining eyes caught his.

"a proper date?" you asked, smiling slyly.

"i- uh, yeah, i mean-" he cleared his throat, hand finding the edge of a table as he tried to figure out what he was trying to say. "people generally treat you in exchange for your company, right?"

"generally," you agreed, focusing on his standup piano on the far wall as you thought. "i don't want you to, though."

“i didn’t mean-” he stretched his jaw - a nervous habit that you had begun to notice - as he readjusted his approach, not wanting to imply that he wanted your exchange to be purely transactional. "i just wanna take you out. for real."

you gave him a small smile, knowing what was the case despite your teasing. "okay. it's a date."

to change the subject from one that seokmin clearly didn't know how to continue - and besides, you weren't hungry enough for dinner yet - you returned the baseball to it's display and asked him how he taught his lessons. he laughed, not because your question was funny, but because he didn't know how to answer it in a way that didn't sound like a pitch to a potential client.

"then teach me like a client," you demanded playfully, skipping to sit at the piano bench and turning to grin at him.

seokmin took a moment to look at you, with a knit sweater tucked in the front of a pair of loose jeans - a far cry from the tight fitting, short dresses he normally saw you in - sat in his apartment as the last remnants of sunrays dipped behind the skyline. "you know how to play," he said finally, but walking over to join you anyways.

"teach me like i don't," you said as he sat beside you, scooting over slightly to accommodate. "i'm very good at acting incompetent."

he laughed again. "normally, people pay me for this kind of time, but i'll give you an intro. we'll start with hand placement," he said, gently putting his hands on the keys. "starting position is important, even though you'll be moving around the keys a lot when you actually play. your thumb," he said, wiggling his right thumb and smiling when you giggled. "it starts on c. that's your root."

"oh, right," you vocalised, placing your right hand similarly an octave up from his. "music has a bunch of letters, huh?"

"only the seven," he joked, pulling his hands off the keys as you comfortably set your fingers where they belonged, a motion you clearly made often. "wow, are you sure you're a beginner? you picked that up fast."

you knocked him with your shoulder, giggling. "quick, what do i do next?"

he smiled. "try pressing the keys in order. c to g, thumb to pinky. be firm, this isn't an electric keyboard. it can sense fear."

you sucked on your cheek, smiling at the way seokmin explained things as you played, but used your pinky to strike the black key instead of g, giggling at the flat note. "oh, that sounded wrong. this piano must be out of tune."

"stop," seokmin said teasingly. "beginners don't have that kind of pinky dexterity, by the way."

"maybe i'm a prodigy," you said, grabbing his sleeve with both hands excitedly. "you have to teach me, mr. lee! you're the only one that can help me hone my gift."

"stop it," he repeated, laughing, giving you a fake glare. he put his hands back on the keys. "lesson over."

you pouted, but it was short-lived as he began to play. you watched his hands effortlessly move over each other as you listened to the gentle flowing melody. despite being classically trained yourself, back when you were young and your parents felt you needed the discipline of regular lessons, you found yourself being impressed by his deft finger movements. your eyes shut, and you let your temple fall to his shoulder as you listened.

"yiruma," you said when he stopped playing despite the song not being over.

his arm went over your head, allowing you to lean into his chest as he planted his hand on the bench behind you, your eyes still shut. "you know your stuff."

"it's one of my favorites." you smiled, eyes fluttering open again. "you play well."

your breath stopped in your throat when you realized how close his face was to yours. "have to. people pay me to teach their kids."

"jeonghan pays me to be nice to him, doesn't mean i'm good at it."

seokmin couldn't help but laugh. "how did that even start, by the way? he would never tell me when i asked."

you sighed, straightening your posture. "i suppose you should know, considering this is becoming a regular thing."

"you don't have to if you don't want to," he assured quietly. you smiled at the thoughtfulness. "i'm just curious, is all."

"i don't mind," you said, shaking your head gently at him. you inhaled, organizing your thoughts - this wasn't a subject you explained very often. "i had a scholarship for the first two years of uni, but i would have to pay tuition afterwards, so i decided to become a paid escort to save for it." you paused to study seokmin's reaction, but for the first time from someone other than jeonghan, you found no creased brow, no vague frown. no judgement. "men would hire me through a broker to accompany them to dinner, go to parties, the general stuff. i even played golf a couple times - terribly, obviously, but rich men really enjoy teaching young pretty women how to play golf. i always got a cab ride home at the end of the night, though. never did anything more. jeonghan was one of my clients."

seokmin nodded. "how long did you do that for?"

despite how you would normally take that question, you knew he meant no shame in asking. "ten-ish months? jeonghan was only for the last month or so, though."

"before he asked you to quit?"

you laughed lightly. "actually, someone else asked me to quit. this guy that had been hiring me regularly for almost my entire career. he wanted me to date him properly. i think he wanted a trophy wife. he was young, like, only a few years older than me, and he was nice, y'know? a little awkward in the beginning, but paying someone to go out with you is always a little awkward, and we got comfortable with each other pretty fast. he wanted to take the next step with me, but he wanted the end goal to be marriage."

seokmin adjusted as he thought. "but you said no?"

"i said yes." his wide eyes made you laugh, but you understood his shock. "i was ready to quit anyways, i guess?" you shrugged, shaking your head. "i wanted to go on real dates instead of getting paid to eat with men my parents' age. yukwon felt realistic to me. someone i could see myself with." you sighed. "i went out with jeonghan during my last week of escorting. when i told him i was quitting, he asked me to choose him instead."

he watched you when you paused, pursing your lips. "and then you said no?"

you giggled, bumping against his chest as he laughed with you. "i tried! but jesus, when that guy gets an idea." you shook your head again. "he asked how much yukwon was paying me - which he wasn't, by the way. we were going to do it for real, even though he was still gonna support me financially and pay for my schooling. i was gonna sign a prenup and everything - but jeonghan kept saying he would double it. said i didn't have to marry him, and that he just wanted to keep spending time with me, and if i wanted to call it quits later, i could. no pressure, no sex, no commitment… he gave me a choice, and i realized i didn't love yukwon. i thought i could, but i didn't."

"so he saved you?"

"from a lifetime of settling? i guess so. he's funnier, too," you admitted sheepishly. "i always had the most fun on nights i was with jeonghan."

seokmin smiled. "he is good at lightening the mood."

"and," you said, eyes wide. "he didn't even want us to be exclusive, said i could keep escorting or go on dates with other guys if i wanted, as long as i promised to make time for him when he wanted me. it was kind of the perfect arrangement."

seokmin nodded again. "was, being the operative word?"

you laughed, remembering how well he knew jeonghan. "lasted less than a month. we spent too much time together, and i quickly realized that every time i went out with someone else, i wished i was with him. to be honest, when i met you, i thought this would be a one time thing, so i may have tried to make it seem a little less involved than it is." you sighed. "we never really defined what we were. i think we've both always known that he was more than a sugar daddy to me, but he does basically pay me so that i can keep my schedule open for him, so i guess it's easier to tell people that? instead of everyone assuming i'm some gold digger taking advantage of his money?" you shrugged. "i do love the guy. i'm about 94% sure he loves me, too."

that made him laugh. "how long have you been together?" he asked, trying to figure out the timeline in his head. he had known about jeonghan's relationship with you for quite some time, though not the exact nature of it, or that you were so fantastic, for the mass majority.

"about a year. right before halloween, actually," you said, smiling as you leaned into him. "you were technically an anniversary gift."

his lip quirked upwards, watching you. "was it a good gift?"

"the best," you whispered, placing a slow kiss on his lips. your hand went to his sharp jaw, and you sighed against him as the kiss deepened, suddenly feeling needier than you had previously.

"does he know you're here?" seokmin asked quietly, mind flashing back to when him and jeonghan had gotten dinner together. "like this, i mean."

you nodded slowly, a hand on the bench to steady you as you leaned into him further. "he's in japan this week, told me i could see you as often as i want. just asked that i call him when i can, we spoke this afternoon."

"promise?"

you giggled. "you act like i would risk it. i like you too much, and you know he would make us both regret it if i was seeing you behind his back."

he examined your face, a smile on his lips, knowing it wasn't the part of the statement that he was meant to focus on but unable to think of anything else. "i like you, too."

so he kissed you, sitting on the piano bench in his loft apartment, and despite it being nowhere near the first time, something about it felt special. new. different.

later, though much sooner than later would imply, when the two of you were unable to stop yourselves from undressing each other, he had you seated firmly in his lap on the couch in his living room. the way he filled you out made you incapable of doing much outside of digging your hands in his hair as he rolled his hips up into yours, rambling about how perfect you were. how well you took him. how he had never seen anything as breathtaking as the way your brows stitched together and your mouth hung open as he fucked you. you huffed, twisting your hips slightly, triggering a groan from you both.

"so beautiful," he muttered, hands on your bare hips, rubbing circles into the soft flesh above the bone. "fuck, you're incredible."

"shit, seokmin," you exhaled, forehead falling on his. you knew he wasn't even using all his length, but he was thrusting deep enough into you to make you see stars. "god, i'm close."

you watched his tongue dart out to wet his lips as he focused on you, pulling himself off the couch and sitting up straight as his hips steadily rolled into yours. "come on, babygirl. you know i love the way you feel."

you cursed, arms winding around his neck as you pressed your chest against his, desperately kissing him as you felt yourself falling over the sweet edge. he groaned when you squeezed at him, arms wrapped around your waist, fingers gripping any amount of you he could as he worked you through your bliss. he only slowed to gently put your back to the couch, your legs wrapped around his waist as he curled over you, arms under your body to pull you into his chest, and a hand at the base of your neck to hold you steady as he firmly fucked you into the cushion.

"fuck, baby, you're so good to me," he groaned, forehead pressed just under your jawline, his mouth latching onto your neck as soon as he managed the words. you were gasping for air, arms over his shoulders, wondering if seokmin always made love this deeply and genuinely, or if you were just special.

afterwards, he discarded the condom that he insisted on using (you asked what the point of you getting something shoved into your cervix was if you couldn't enjoy his particularly bountiful creampies with no consequence, but he said he was not getting cum on the couch his clients sit on), pulled his underwear back on, and returned to you quickly, kissing up your body after pulling your panties back over your hips. you ran your fingers through his messy hair, causing him to look up at you. he said sorry, a laugh on his lips, asking if you wanted to get food delivered instead of going out.

"that sounds perfect," you giggled. "don't apologize."

"i'll take you out for real this weekend, i promise," he said, sitting up and stretching out his shoulder. you watched, quietly admiring how gentle and soft he seemed, with surprisingly firm muscles hiding under his usual large sweaters and shirts. "and i'll pick you up so we don't get tempted. but for now, kimchi soup and bibimbap?"

you nodded excitedly, sitting up to wrap your arms around him and planting a kiss on his shoulder. "sounds delicious."

he tried not to get excited by your touch, thinking about how you had said this was becoming a regular thing, and therefore he didn't need to get as much of you as he could before you slipped through his fingers like he had the first few times you met. he couldn't help himself, though, when his eyes met yours and you smiled gently at him, and had no choice but to put an agonizingly slow kiss on your lips before he stood to announce he was changing into something comfortable if you were just going to stay in. you giggled and grabbed your sweater from where it got discarded, pulling it over your head as you told him there was no chance in hell you were putting jeans on again before the morning, and he smiled at the implication that you would be staying the night with him.

"i have lessons tomorrow," he reminded you softly as he gathered up his clothes and walked to the stairs. "if you'd like, you can stick around, but it'll be boring."

you hummed. "i don't have class, but i should do schoolwork," you mused, watching him walk up the steps to what you could assume was his lofted bedroom. "it's been lonely at the house, though."

"if you wanna bring your things here, you can," seokmin suggested, his voice projecting easily through the space. he pulled on a pair of shorts and a more casual shirt than the one he had been wearing for his work day. "it would give you something to do while i teach youths how to play chopsticks. do you stay at jeonghan's when he's not around, too?"

you laughed, thinking about your all but abandoned apartment as you meandered towards the stairs. "lately, yeah. i used to spend more nights at home than in his bed, but he gets really busy planning stuff in the winter and has less time to take me out." you stretched your back. "i think he likes knowing i'll be there when he gets home late. makes the day easier." 

seokmin nodded as he came back down, running a hand through his hair, thinking that he, too, would find his days easier if it meant going to bed with you every night. "that's very kind of you."

"it's selfish, i promise." he laughed. "if you saw how tiny my place is, you would choose jeonghan's too. besides, i get cold in bed alone."

he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into his chest. "is that why you're here?"

you giggled. "no, i'm here because you invited me over. but that might be a factor in why i'm staying," you teased, hugging him tightly.

the next day, you were sprawled on his bed, writing an accompanying essay for your composition project as he taught lessons down below, only emerging to refill your water glass and use the restroom as infrequently as possible, trying to not disturb his lessons. parents often accompanied the children, usually reading a book and listening to their child practice. a college friend of his stopped by, as he tried to do at least once a month, accompanying his niece, and seokmin recalled that he was the one that had given jeonghan his number again over a year ago, feeling like he should thank him but not knowing how.

"seokmin," you called down softly when you heard him chatting casually with his friend. you padded down the steps with your empty water glass, spotting the young girl at the kitchen table with a marker and a sheet of paper, smiling when you remembered her slightly clumsy, but surprisingly advanced keystrokes, considering her age.

"what's up?" seokmin asked, pushing off of the counter he was leaning against, and he ignored the quick, questioning nudge mingyu pushed into his side.

"hi, sorry," you said, waving lightly when you noticed the tall man beside him. "i was wondering - if you have time - if you could listen to my composition piece and tell me if you think it leans more romantic or more post-great war?"

seokmin nodded. "absolutely. do you need me now, or can it wait ten minutes?"

"it can wait," you assured, eyes darting between the two men. you lifted the glass in your hand. "i needed a break."

he smiled, taking your glass and moving to pull open the fridge. "this is mingyu, by the way. mingyu, y/n. he's an architect, also."

"also?" mingyu asked, eyeing you. seokmin stared at you, realizing what he said.

your brows ruffled as you studied the tall man's face, not recognizing it. "we must not be in the same social group. i'm a friend of jeonghan's."

he gave you silent thanks for keeping the relationship ambiguous. mingyu, however, nearly yelled. "yoon jeonghan?" he laughed. "you know, i didn't even see that guy at his own halloween party. you still keep in touch, i assume, seokmin?"

he nodded, putting your filled water glass on the counter beside you, and you wondered how you never saw mingyu at the party, either. "yeah, we hang out fairly often."

"he introduced us," you interjected. mingyu smiled between you two. "thought we'd match well, i guess."

"well, you just asked a music teacher to review your composition, so," mingyu laughed. "he was right?"

seokmin studied you with a crooked smile on his lips. "have you ever known yoon jeonghan to be wrong?"

you stayed another, more innocent night, but when seokmin woke the next morning, his face was pressed against the side of you neck, and you were pushing your ass back against his morning wood.

"fuck, good morning," seokmin groaned, hands gripping at your hips where they had already been aimlessly floating.

"oh, thank god you're awake," you panted out. you spun in his grasp, pushing his shoulder back on the bed and climbing atop him. "you must have been having a fantastic dream, because you would not stop touching me."

he couldn't help the whine in his throat, mostly from embarrassment. "i'm so sorry."

"don't be," you rushed out, peeling off your shirt. "i just need you now."

considering this was his third time seeing it, he didn't think he would be so awestruck still, but the snapshot of you, topless, seated on his lap with your hands on his chest was a view that seokmin would likely never get over, because it felt like he was the dorky, awkward protagonist and you were the long-shot love interest that was way too cool and way too hot for him in this cliché coming of age comedy.

you kissed him, and he pushed your hips down to grind against his lap, pulling a gasp from your lips. he took the opportunity to bring a hand to your neck, pulling you into open mouth kisses. you moaned without shame as you rolled your hips.

"you know what jeonghan told me?" you asked, pulling back to tug his underwear just far enough down to release the member you couldn't stop thinking about. 

you straddled his lap, hands on your thighs. seokmin pushed his bare cock against your core, the wet fabric sticking lightly to his length. "what, baby?"

"he told me he wanted you to plug me up," you breathed, biting your lip when seokmin used a thumb to pull aside your underwear and drag your wetness across his dick. you moaned. "he wanted you to fuck me senseless and tell him all about it."

seokmin groaned, neck stretching out. "i can do that."

"no, baby," you said, bringing his free hand to your face and putting a kiss in his palm before you lifted yourself up, his thumb still hooked on your panties as you rubbed the head of his cock through your folds. "i wanna fuck you."

you sunk down onto him, jaw dropping. he smiled lightly, running his hands down your thighs. "i'll let you if you can."

your toes clenched, and you tried to maintain face. "i can."

seokmin folded his arms under his head, trying to avoid the temptation of fucking up into your warmth. he sighed, breathing out a "go on, then."

you put your hands on his chest and bounced on him several times, biting at your lip at how wide he stretched you out, but taking too much pride in the way his eyes hung half lidded and his breathy groaning to stop. 

your hands went to his neck, leaning forward, lifting his head slightly off the pillow to kiss him, his hands falling from behind his head to hold yours, stopping you from pulling away. 

he moaned into your open mouth, and you backed up for only a second to blearily meet his eyes as he panted. "baby."

you nodded, stealing a few more messy kisses. "yes?"

he groaned again, your hips twisting over his. "you're like a dream."

you could feel the heat radiating off your neck and cheeks, but you just pushed on his chest to sit upright, hands landing on his thighs. you moaned again, unapologetically, as you rotated your hips over his, and he bucked into you at the angle change. "if this is the dream, please don't wake up."

seokmin had a sneaking suspicion that he was in love with you, or at the very least falling towards it. the confirmation of this fact threw itself in his face, not when you proved that you could fuck him, sitting deeply on him to push his cum further in, or when you squealed and giggled as he threw your back onto the bed so that he could pull your underwear off proper and bury his tongue in your heat, but afterwards, when he wandered into the kitchen after using the restroom and found you wearing one of his shirts, waiting as his electric kettle bubbled to life, his favorite blue mug on the counter beside a white one - the white one, he realized, with the finger heart design that he had chosen for your coffee the day prior. and he told you so, rushing to explain himself and assure you that you didn’t have to say it back, but you just hushed him and smiled, saying that you loved him too.

seokmin had to go to the entertainment company that afternoon. you walked with him to the station near his apartment and he sat you in a cab, a kiss on your lips, before he hurried down to catch his ride to work. he breathed heavily when he could finally lean against a wall in the train, having to run to catch it before the doors closed.

seokmin❣️: almost didn't make the train 🙃

you: but you did!!! proud of you 👍

seokmin❣️: thanks 🥴💕

you were both smiling after that.

he took you out to eat that weekend, as promised, and you had honestly forgotten what it was like to date people that weren't jeonghan. you liked riding the subway with him (you couldn't even remember the last time you took it), and you thought it was cute that he let you stand against a wall to keep easy balance as he stood in front of you. you were slightly impressed that he barely rocked with the movement, only grabbing an overhead loop when the train was pulling into a station.

"wait, you're especially pretty right now," he said suddenly, leaning forward to inspect your eyes.

your head hit the wall gently in reaction, flushing at his comment, wanting to bury your face in your scarf. "thank you."

he gave you his signature crooked smile. "of course."

it was cold out, but seokmin wrapped his hand over yours, shoving the whole ordeal into his coat pocket as he walked you down the street towards the restaurant he had picked. you giggled, squeezing his hand in his pocket, but he just continued telling you about which of the trainees he was working with seemed like they would debut.

"jiyoon composes, too! i'm really impressed with her actually," he said, trailing off when he saw the sign for the restaurant. "ah, here it is."

you thanked him when he held the door open for you, and you were immediately struck with the smell of tomato, cheese, and bread.

"i haven't had pizza in ages," you said excitedly, following him to a table.

"don't tell me," seokmin said, helping you take off your jacket and hanging it on a hook at the end of the booth. "you guys don't order pizza?"

you shook your head, sliding into the booth comfortably. "not often. jeonghan likes asian food."

seokmin froze as he was pulling off his jacket to stare at you. "what about you?"

"i like eating."

he laughed. "well, i like pizza."

after dinner, you insisted he come back to the house with you. he said he didn't know, thinking that you would probably need your energy for when jeonghan got home the next day. you pouted, knitting your fingers with his as the two of you stood on the sidewalk outside the pizza place.

"but i really wanna show you my record collection," you said, batting your eyelashes at him.

that was all it took.

you discovered that there was a bus stop near jeonghan's home, and while you would likely never take a bus without seokmin, you thought it was a good nugget of information to tuck away as you marched through the front door of the estate you practically called home.

"welcome to yoon manor," you joked, spinning to smile at seokmin.

he looked around, and despite having been here before, it felt grander coming through the main entrance and without the distraction of party guests. he had seen it empty briefly, from a different angle, when you were pulling him up to your bed a few weeks prior, but he realized he hadn't actually been able to see much when you were the focus of his attention.

"the kitchen's that way, there's a bathroom," you said, pointing at the opening past the stairs as you pulled off your scarf. you folded it over your arm as you walked further into the home, seokmin following you closely. you walked past a partial wall, pointing further down the hall that held the secondary living space that he originally met you in. "there's a bathroom to the left there, and if you go to the end of the hall there's an open sunroom."

seokmin looked around the room you stood in, recognizing it in bits and pieces, but it looking much different without a crowd and flashing lights.

"and this is the living room," you said, spreading your arms as you spun to him. "tv, couch, bar, and most importantly," you giggled, tugging him towards the far wall of the room, which was covered in deep toned shelving, speakers, and a record player. "my record collection."

you took off your jacket as seokmin looked around in awe, noticing you had select autographed records displayed alone on picture ledges with spotlights pointed at them. one picture ledge was empty, centered just above the player. you tossed your coat into the couch, pulling seokmin's off his shoulders as well, despite his distraction.

"these are all yours?" he asked, turning to look at you after you had discarded the coats.

you nodded, spinning the felt of the record player mindlessly as you looked around. "i actually had started a collection years ago, but i couldn't make an excuse to spend the money on it very often. jeonghan gave me a pretty good excuse. also, whenever he pissed me off, he knew he could take me to a record shop and i would forgive him."

seokmin laughed. "does that happen a lot?"

"not as often as you'd think, considering what an ass he is," you teased. you gestured to the collection. "this is my baby, though. the house is his, but this wall is mine."

"well, play me a record," seokmin requested plainly, making you smile into a laugh.

"okay," you said, scooting past him to pull out one of the many cube drawers amidst the shelving. you flipped through a few. "dancing music?"

seokmin watched your hands, humming. "slow dancing, but, like, in a nostalgic discoteque."

you thought for a second, then closed the drawer to move to a different one, quickly flipping through and finding the record you wanted. you pulled the lp out, putting the bright blue sleeve with five smiling men on the empty picture ledge.

seokmin wrapped his arms around you as you set the record, striking the play button and enjoying the whirring as the lp spun, the needle connecting and the speakers scratching to life. you spun in his grip, laying your arms over his shoulders as he pulled you away from the record stand, into a more open space to playfully dance to the soulful bass lines and pop melodies of new edition.

"this house is insane, right?" seokmin asked, squinting at you as you laughed and nodded.

"it really is. the craziest part is he's still working on it."

"really?" seokmin looked around. "what else could he wanna change?"

you let your eyes wander. "i think it's a work in progress for him. the sunroom was brand new when we met, and he added this record display last winter, when i told him i always wanted to collect. the bar is new," you pointed. "he finished that in october. the kitchen was a summer project."

he blinked heavily, trying to register. "does he do all the work himself?"

"his team helps him," you explained. "he has a few contractors he works with and they manage the construction projects, but every once in a while i wake up on a sunday and he's cutting wood in the garage because he got an idea. he drafts all the changes, usually participates in the build, and picks most of the furniture, but he has people to collect the options for him."

"and he also does all that for other people, too?" you nodded, giggling. "and has time to take you to events almost every weekend?"

"i know. i didn't understand how he found the time until i realized that he just gets paid to do his hobby."

seokmin nodded. "me too, i guess."

you grinned. "me three. you should stay with us more," you suggested, rocking with him gently. "he'll be late tomorrow, but he's working from home this week…"

"hush," seokmin chuckled. "i have to work. besides, i'm sure he wants you alone after letting me claim you while he’s been gone."

"about that," you said, pulling away slightly to give him a cheeky smile. "i haven't gotten him to admit it yet, but i think jeonghan has a crush on you."

seokmin choked out a laugh. "what? me?"

"seokmin," you started, giving him a look. "he wanted you to join us for sex. more than once."

"okay," he scoffed lightly. "people have sex just for the sex sometimes," he pointed out, but in a tone that had no chance at convincing anyone.

"sure," you giggled. "but think about it. he kept me to himself all this time, and suddenly he's encouraging us to see each other without him? asking me about everything we do together..."

he swallowed. "everything?"

"everything," you breathed, eyes trained on his lips. "he knows i'll always go back to him, and i think he's hoping i'll bring you with me."

he blinked at you, processing. "is that what you're doing? bringing me back to him?"

"only if that's something you're interested in," you stated, cocking your head.

"him, you mean?"

you thought a second. "yes?"

you watched him blink repeatedly, seemingly considering the concept. he thought back to all the nights that became early mornings, laughing and joking with the architect since before he had even an ounce of notoriety. he thought of how jeonghan had reached out to him again a few long years later, and the way he had insisted on paying every time they got food. he wondered if there had been something happening that he hadn't noticed, his oblivious nature getting the best of him again. he thought about when things changed, when they met less often and jeonghan seemed quieter around him. and months later, when he started mentioning you.

"maybe," he said finally, mind whirling. "i don't know, i've never thought about it."

you nodded, putting your arms over his shoulders and swaying lightly to the music. "take your time," you said, smiling when his forehead pressed against yours. "we'll wait for you."

[carpsurprise]

bro 👁👁 if u wanna talk more abt jodi and her parenting i would LOVE to hear it :D honestly you worded it much better than i could asdmsbf ty!!

THANK U SO MUCH IVE BEEN DYING TO TALK ABOUT THIS FOR A HOT MINUTE ok im gonna bleed this in with some of MY headcanons personally and some of the canon dialogue!! i’ll bold my headcanons so its easier to differentiate what im talkin about bopbop also this is SO long im sorry

also this makes it seem like i don’t like jodi i do!! (thats my mom in law hehe) but like... just some of the stuff she says points to deeper insecurity issues. 

so in short: this is kind of a jodi analysis.

it’s def touched upon by multiple people that she doesn’t seem happy (her dialogue is full of ‘i wants’ and ‘i wishes) but i do think that’s not entirely the case, it’s just a classic mother thing to feel sort of (lack of a better word) trapped into motherhood and her responsibilities. and i def think kent being away probably worsened that.

with kent being away she was pretty much a single mother, and as seen in sam’s canon character, he has to do a lot to make up for kent’s absence... financially and emotionally, for both her and vince. vince needs a positive male figure to look up to to inspire him to be the best he can be, and jodi needs stability and help with her own responsibilities. sam tries to fulfill all of that and even some of his marriage dialogue (and his three heart event) it definitely puts stress on him.

so, sam tries his best! but in some dialogue and sam’s heart events you can see she still gets on him for things that makes him like :/ she still views him as a child occasionally despite being a full adult who is also sorta-parenting vincent, acting as some sort of doing-good role model for him, and i believeeee he says he tries to be his best specifically for vincent’s growth.

jodi still treats vincent like a child, but she still treats him better than she treats sam often. which kinda ties into the point i made about sam being the trial/error kid. i’ve headcanoned and i’ve seen others also say that kent and jodi got married straight out of high school. u kno typical military stuff. this also kind of explains her sort of ‘trapped feeling’ dialogue since it seems like she didn’t get much time to explore the world or maybe even explore herself as an individual. caroline likes gardening, marnie loves animals to death, and robin knows woodworking/a trade but jodi... just has regular ‘housewife’ things like cooking and cleaning.

^ like this doesn’t sound like someone who had a CHOICE in what her life has turned out to be. and i think sam got the BRUNT of that.

and here ^ she’s kind of immature in some of her dialogue, esp since (like u said in ur post!!) that sam caught on to it and has reacted negatively to it. i would venture to a point and say she most likely suffered with post-partum depression for sam especially if she felt trapped with kent as she does in game. i def think that with this and in canon, sam was probably used as her guinea pig for parenting. obviously no one is a natural born mother but if kent had just gone away in the military and she had sam, i can definitely see where some resentment for kent and sam would come in... along with resentment for herself for getting herself into that situation.

which that kind of train of thought could be an explanation for some of her self-deprecating/wants and wishes dialogue. once the issues of raising sam had kinda smoothed out, and he became old enough to realize exactly what was going on with his father/the war and his mother’s reactions to that stress, she probably already figured out how to parent vincent. esp since sam and vincent seem so similar (adhd imo) what didn’t work with sam jodi was able to figure out.

but going back to how she treats sam! i do think she would still kind of hold some resentment. obviously she loves sam but she still views him as a child, despite how mature he really is... like in his marriage dialogue and his three heart event. i honestly think his whole sunshine/golden retriever boy personality is ofc true but. partially true. i think he does it as a save face for how he really feels, which is anxious (about his fathers return and vincent growing up).

but one of the first tags i put! def more headcanon-y just from the stuff i mentioned above. jodi definitely gives me the ‘weaponizes basic needs’ in an argument type of mom. u kno the whole “i feed you, you have a roof over your head, i put clothes on your back” kind of manipulation. which.. yeah jodi you should! i think she’s very insecure about herself and very anxious over her situation and is at a constant state of trying to prove to herself her own worth. like.. the only thing she is/does is be a mother so when sam (or not so often vincent) fuck up, she takes it personally because raising those two is the only thing she really does. if she sees herself as a failure there... then what as she spent her life doing (instead of travelling/having hobbies/etc)

kids naturally fuck up she learned through sam!! one of the things my mother told me all the time while growing up was that it was “her first time ever being a mother” and i think jodi would honestly... have those same thoughts. she’s tired and overworked and on top of that has to raise two boys as a ‘single mother’. i think she’d snap easily on sam from too much pressure, whether he was younger (by accident) or as he got older (on purpose). it seems like there’s little room for accidents on anyone else’s part in her house.

like sam’s four heart event. ignoring the obvious why-the-hell-are-you-handing-me-an-egg issue, sam very obviously drops the egg on accident, and jodi storms in and creates an issue out of it. which... it’s an accident. it seems out of character for sam to drop the egg on purpose and cause an issue for his MOTHER. obviously he does stuff that makes lewis mad on purpose, but he doesn’t do stuff like that to jodi. but she still gets upset over... his hand slipping.

and his ten heart event. why don’t we talk about that more often? from her dialogue its hinted at that she thought he was ... y’know... but still had said if i recall correctly!! “i’m coming in”. there was no question and it gives sam no option to tell her no. so it seems she has that kind of ‘control’ in their house where she can just invade sam’s privacy (granted.. she knocked but still) even when she thought he was doing THAT. idk i don’t like the “i’m coming in”... it seems like she is not giving sam the further consent for her to enter his room (or private space)

ok this is long i need to wrap this up but bottom line she loves her kids. of course she does! but i think sam definitely gets treated ‘worse’ and kinda has as the firstborn/oldest. jodi, with her kids, finally has some control of her life back since she is their mother and they have to listen to her. she doesn’t know exactly what she’s doing still, and once one of the boys (sam) messes up she takes it as a personal attack since the One thing she does in her life is be a mother. this was very long but thank u !!!! i love doing a lil character analysis

[holycalf]

i started watching sku bc of your blog (and i really enjoy it!) but i dont get why you seem to like shiori but not ruka....i mean it seems like his intentions were a lot better than hers ever were tbfh am i missing something? not saying he went about things GREAT but....at least he actually seemed to care. shiori was just a bitch for the sake of being a bitch it seemed like...

hi! im glad ure enjoying it! it can definitely be a lot at times, and i think the first 12 eps can rub ppl the wrong way so props to u for getting thru those (even tho i liked em :) ) this is gonna be long so if u feel like reading an essay feel free to read under the cut

um.. i dont really know where to begin tbh? i mean you cant really talk about any of these characters without talking abt the other two so.... this is gonna be long.

so lets take shiori, who has a very classic case of internalized homophobia. which is confirmed by ikuhahras outtake on ep. 17 which states the following

 “I finally realized the truth. To think that she loved me back! What a miracle! But...‘The loser in love is the one who lets their heart be ruled by it.’Everyone's adopted a provocative attitude toward someone of the opposite sex that they like at least once or twice, to get that person to notice them. So it's okay if I do that.This love will crumble if we touch. But when people don't touch, the love eventually dies away .That's why I decided to keep your love prisoner. To make sure that you love me forever. That game will make our love ‘eternal.’ I'm sure of it.We were ‘lovers lost from the beginning.”

so shioris in love with juri. im not sure if thats something u caught onto or not but its definitely the quintessence of her character, and needs to be considered when we consider her against ruka- since its a shared affection. also, i just like shiori, i dont necessarily think shes GOOD i just enjoy watching her and she feels very raw. shiori has a crippling inferiority complex, you can even tell through off handed conversations with her friends in hallways she exaggerates her stories to be more liked. juri is someone who has things come easy to her, and doesnt even really seem to care or notice. in the shows canon shes: liked by the student body, liked by teachers, admired by men (and girls too), academically inclined, good at bowling, captain of fencing club (and likely the most talented duelist- since shes the only one utena never properly beats) and a MODEL?????????? and shiori, at least in her own eyes, is painfully mundane. growing up next to someone who seems to have everything go in their favor, all of the while youre harboring having feelings for them (and jealous that youre among SO many suitors) is so frustrating! especially when you dont believe to have any at all. the elevator sequence when she discovers juris locket is a bit of a power trip for shiori, and also just a sort of confusion. shioris “why do you look at me like that?!” when she considers juri mid breakdown is a clear reflection of her own confusion, she may as well be saying “how could you possibly love me?”...but that was the black rose arc which all got undone anyways- so by the time we see shiori ruka arc she doesnt even know juris got the hots for her. when she first sees ruka, shes staring at juri first and only zeroes in on ruka once she hears people talking abt him. she takes ruka the same way she did that boy in middle school because he seems to be something coveted by the girls around her, its a very closeted gay girl move to decide to go for a boy just because other girls are into him... and it definitely helps that hes in such close contact w juri...he could easily be the one stored in that locket of hers, so why not take him? 

so then we have ruka, who the entire time we watch him is smug, condescending, and genuinely one of the most unpleasant characters on the show. by the end we learn hes in love with juri, so maybe this persona was embellished to push her towards revolution to “free her from shiori” or whatever but.... sorry i dont care LOL! the way he treated shiori ALONE was enough for me to dislike him, there was NO need to tear apart and embarrass the girl like that. he took clear advantage of her crush on juri. his locker is seen right next to juris, and shiori is pressed up against one of the two lockers, but we arent shown which,  “after all, that wasnt my sword,”....he knows shiori has been going to juris locker (and potentially polishing her sword but who knows. all we know is that she goes to juris locker.) and it is later revealed hes extra certain of her feelings because upon publically dumping her (another dick move) we hear her kinda stutter “I love you more than.... I love you more than anyone else” shes clearly beating around a bush because theyre in public, hes pinpointed she and juri are both into eachother, and instead of being a normal ass guy about it and just SETTING THEM UP and telling them to work their stuff out he chooses to, “out of love”  assault juri, emotionally manipulates the girl juri is in love with,  then inadvertantly cause juris locket to break which upsets her so deeply she forfeits her duel with utena. and upon that locket breaking he has the AUDACITY to think hes somehow freed her from something... when the girl is breaking down crying in the rain (the first and only time we ever see juri cry...even if its implied she does it in the shower that one time lol).......then just???dies??? like all he does in his time on the show is cause problems and die, all because he couldnt get over his feelings for a lesbian.... it just feels SO gross to me that he hides his assault and general abuse (can we talk abt how he likely took shioris virginity, JUST to break her down???) behind some icky hero complex

PLUS we see shiori at the end of that episode realize shes in that locket while juri is dueling, and we see her run up to juri at the end of the ep and it doesnt look malicious, it feels very...resolutiony? esp when you put it next to the miki/kozue closing scene of their car arc duel, which is explicitly bad terms, this feels more hopefully....suggesting some part of shiori has at least changed. ruka never got that luxury, he completely exploited two girls in order to add dramatic flare to his last few days and felt valid in doing so..... shiori never seemed to think her actions were JUSTIFIED.....which is sort of the point of the black rose arc where shiori is arguably at her worst........... the very ugliest part of ppl are brought out in those elevator sessions so thats what we see of shiori? 

sorry for the essay!! but i hope this helps and make sense :-) feel free to ask any more questions u have abt the show, and i hope u continue enjoying it! im assuming ure still watching it, i dont know how far u are but if u JUST finished 29 then that means ure getting to some of my fave episodes! (33,37,39 :) ) 

tl,dr: shiori never assaulted anyone

[sneyrwrites]

Level Of Concern | Ushijima Wakatoshi x Anxious!Reader

|Wordcount: 1,5k |  

|Genre: Fluff, slight angst,  I’m an angsty gal. | 

|Warnings: Just a reflection of my isolated mood bc of quarantine ;u; (2 months and still going | 

|Inspiration Snong: Level of concern -Twenty One Pilots|

|Clarification: The measures taken by the government in my country might differ from the rest of the countries. Here (Arg.) You can request a permit of circulation in case you need it. Assisting someone is a valid reason.|

The world was going crazy. As a college student, you were in self quarantine in your apartment.  All by yourself.

Your roommate had gone to her hometown to spend this time with her family. You weren't as lucky. The only thing you wanted was to not feel as bothered by the isolation as you felt. Alone with no one to talk, you were relying only on your phone for a way of communication with your loved ones.

You were specially concerned about your mom, as she was a nurse, in the Frontline of this crisis, and she was exposed to the Covid-19. You didn't want to imagine what  would  happen is she got infected, your chest constricting with fear just thinking about it. And to make it all worse, your boyfriend was not responding to your texts. You knew it was dumb to be upset by that, Ushijima was never the type of guy to constantly be on his phone, busy with his schoolwork or training, so it wasn't like his behavior changed at all, even if the circumstances had.

You would often visit each other through the weekends, sometimes even staying a bit longer to make up for the long waits. He was on the other side of the city, and most of his weekdays consisted of studying and training. This pandemic had taken away the precious time you two had together, and you were so pissed about it. It would've been awesome if he could've come over and spent  the quarantine together.

You'd hoped this odd circumstances would give him some extra time to be on his phone, maybe even able to do a video call to soothe your nerves. Ushijima was your cable to earth most of the time, keeping your anxiety ridden thoughts at Bay with his words. But strange enough, his demeanor towards you was the same if not colder than usual. With all the load of work your professors had given you, you were a little distracted, but the moment you tried to relax, the message left on read on your phone screen made your stomach coil with concern. Was Wakatoshi ignoring you on purpose? Your good morning text was left on read, even after a good amount of hours he still hadn't reply. You haven't felt this way since you proposed a more serious relationship to Ushi. The insecurity was etched in your brain, and on top of that the constant worry about your mom didn't help at all. Sitting on the couch, you typed on the screen. Wakatoshi was on-line, but still, he was ignoring you. You couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey Ushi... I'm really concerned about this whole situation..."

You hit send, waiting as he saw the text and typed a reply.

"There's no need to be. If you stay home there's no danger".

Your eyes opened up with surprise at his answer. Did he just brushed your concern off? That was way too cold even for him. He couldn't be that oblivious. You understood he was a little socially awkward, but this was ridiculous.  

Insecurity took the best of you and, feeling rejected, you started to think about your entire relationship. 

Since the beginning you were the one who approached him, Ushijima not caring about your person at all. The day you finally had enough of just watching him from the sidelines and you approached him with your feelings out in the open,  he just responded with a confused expression.  

But still, he accepted.

You tried to spend time together, going to his games and his practices when he was okay with it, which was all the time, almost like he didn't care at all if you were there.

Maybe it was just pity... that would explain how mean he was being. You considered confronting him about it, but decided against it. You were feeling bad enough, a fight with him was just going to drag you down even deeper.

Throwing a pity party, you allowed yourself to drown your sorrows in ice cream and romcoms. you searched on Netflix for a few minutes until you came across the classic "He's just not that into you "

How fitting? You thought ironically.

 As your eyes welled with tears, you pressed play

A   day had  passed, and  you still hadn't talked to Ushijima at all. It was a consistent proof that you were the only one into the relationship. If you didn't reach out to him he wasn't going to. Seeing the end of the relationship coming up, you cried again. 

You were in love with him, for real. The moments you two had together were happy ones, never once a fight in the six months you were together, and Ushijima was affectionate in his own way, like for example holding your hand on the streets, or treating you to your favorite snack... 

But come to think about it, it was his favorite too, and holding hands was really that big of a deal?

After your daily crying session over your failed relationship, you talked to your mom. Luckily she was fine, the hospital providing her with the protection gear. That made you feel a bit better, but still, the whole situation was shitty. You felt like you were in the apocalypse, and the one you loved was not there with you. In fact, scratch that, he didn't even care.

If only Ushi would text you, He could bring down your level of concern,  even if it was something small, like a "Hey" or a "u ok?" but your notifications where still as empty as ever.  

You had to confront him about your feeling sooner or later, but still, you had no doubt that once you did, everything was going to be over and maybe it wasn’t the best time to do it, in that kind isolation you were going to go nuts, and adding the stress of a breakup was not a good idea. 

You were so confused. So doing what you do best, you picked up the phone and ordered takeout. Stress eating was your defense mechanism.

Not even ten minutes went by when the sound of the doorbell filled your apartment. You hurriedly made your way to the door, not caring about your messy look, with your disheveled hair and puffy eyes. It was a shitty situation, and everybody had it rough, so nobody could judge you.

Taking out your wallet with one hand, ready to pay for the food, you opened the door, only to be surprised by who was at the hallway.

“Toshi?” You whispered surprised, it almost felt like a dream, you were tempted to pinch yourself just in case.

What was he doing outside your apartment?  In the middle of a quarantine? Specifically him, who was a Mr. Goody Two-shoes. 

“Can i come in?” He asked when you didn’t offer. Nodding, you moved aside to let him in, the surprise still present.

You looked at him, in his sweatpants, and the black hoodie that covered his hair. You almost laughed when you noticed that he looked like a ninja with the also black face mask. A back pack that seemed about to explode hang from his shoulder, as his hands carried two grocery bags filled to the brim.

Ushijima noticed your confused gaze and left the bags on top of the table. Taking his face mask off, he shrugged his backpack and looked at you .

“I thought  you might be having a rough time by yourself here, so I the permission to stay with you.... I hope you don’t mind. I can leave if you want to.” You still didn’t respond, too commoved to speak. “Sorry I didn’t reply, but my phone got wet and it’s bee glitching since, that’s why I didn’t warn you before coming.” 

Well, now you just felt guilty for doubting Ushijima's feelings for you. This was a solid proof he actually cared, and pure love for him filled your heart.

“Do you mind?” He asked again, still not sure. You didn’t reply and walked up to him, attempting to hug him. “Wait, I need to wash this clothes and wash my hands just in case.” Ushijima stopped you, shrugging off his hoodie and going to the washing machine.

There was his logical and responsible boyfriend you knew and loved. 

He came back with a fresh shirt on and smelling like your vanilla soap. Wakatoshi was the one to hug you, his arms circling your shoulders and bringing your body closer to him, forehead colliding with his chest.

“Did you finish your online classes today?” He asked. 

“Yes, do you want to do something in particular?” Your voice was muffle by the fabric of his shirt but he understood, anyway.

“I brought those wierd chips you like, and some candy in case you were feeling under the weather. Do you want to watch a movie? Or whatever you prefer." He proposed, his hand caressing your hair with affection.

The anxiety and nerves you had all dissipated as you watched Ushijima set the couch with a bunch of blankets and pillows so you can sit on it and have a movie night.

Ushijima really knew how to bring your level of concern down, and that's why you loved him so much.

|Author Note: So this is a stress writing, bc my (ex)boyfriend confessed he cheated on me, so Yay!. Ushijima wouldn’t treat me like this ;u; I’m sorry if it too cheesy, but I kinda needed it|

✘ Masterlist

[youarejesting]

Quarantine.27

[Masterlist] Editor: [Yoongisauce] Pairing: BTS x reader Friends2Lovers  Genres: friendship, drama, romance SLOWEST OF BURNS. until the anticipation kills us all… Rating: PG-13 and above Summary: Your brother works with a few BigHit dance teams and whilst having permission to accompany him at work the city shuts down banning anyone from stepping outside for a whole WEEK while they disinfect the streets. If you step outside you might get arrested, shot or poisoned by the chemicals they are emitting through the city. Words: 1.5k Announcement: I am also updating my 365 prompts this evening, if anyone is interested in them.

[Part 1]  [Part 26] [Part 28] [Tag Yourself Here]

“The car park!”

You snapped your head up searching for the parking lot your brother yelled of. 

“It’s the one with the cheap parking! Remember?” Thomas continued over the walkie, “That’s where I left my car the morning of the alert. Go there. The passenger door doesn’t lock, remember!” 

Seokjin kept repeating, car park, over and over again. Your head pounded, heartbeat just as loud and heavy, and as quick as your boots on the pavement. 

 “And you told me to get a new car because the passenger door doesn’t close properly,” Thomas got  out. “We parked there and walked a couple of blocks to work and got coffee,” he stammered, “-but that’s not the point. Go there and hide in the car.”

Pulling Seokjin into the parking lot, you searched for the correct number and letter sequence among the plates. Finally, spotting the rusty green mess of a car. It looked beaten up, littered with dents.

Pushing the fatigued Idol towards the vehicle. You ripped open the door, forcing him inside. Shutting the door behind the both of you. 

You panted as you tried to catch your breath. You could hear the men coming. Their footsteps echoing through the underground lot. Yanking down the back seat you shoved Seokjin into the boot and climbed in after. Moving the seats back up to their original position, you hoped to hide from prying eyes. 

Silence washed over the both of you as the adrenaline wore off. You ripped off your helmets. The air in the trunk was fairly clean, since the two of you hastily scrambled to get there. Clothing and cd’s sharing the space with you. 

Seokjin’s body awkwardly curled around you, stuck simultaneously under and over you . 

He tried to manoeuvre out from under you but ended up digging his knee into your thigh. You couldn’t help but let out a scream from the burning searing sensation.

Seokjin’s hand snapped to your mouth muffling your screams. He frantically reached for his phone to use as a light source. Scanning down your body his eyes widened. The two of you looked like you belonged in a horror movie. Blood covered both your legs, soaking the thin carpet padding of the trunk.

On closer inspection, Seokjin spotted a hole in your suit. He wiggled his torso down until he was almost bent in half. His fears were confirmed. You had been shot, directly in the thigh.

Turning to straddle you, Seokjin frowned and unzipped your suit. If you weren’t in this situation right now, under different circumstances, you may have thought this action was sexy. But the blood loss made you feel hot and nauseous.

Seokjin opened the suit, exposing your thigh, and grabbed one of the clean shirts that littered the back. He tied it tightly around the wound. He waited as he heard the men walk by, their footsteps moving quickly and voices calling out. 

The pain was bearable if you laid completely still but every breath and heartbeat was pure agony. After waiting as long as he could, Seokjin moved slowly so he was laying reverse. His head at your feet and your feet at his head. 

“I had a dream like this once,” He chuckled, opening the medical bag and searching for things that could help you.

“We were in a sixty-nine position in the boot of my brother’s car as bandits tried to kill us and I bled out. A classic, Who hasn’t had that one yet?” 

Your dry laugh was cut off by a groan as he bumped your leg. You reached between your bodies grabbing the bag and pulling out the last dose of morphine and a clean syringe. You have given injections in the past but you had a big fear of needles. You weren’t sure if this would work. 

“Not quite that old gem, cause you weren’t dying but I still took you to heaven if you know what I mean?” He snickered, “You were moaning a little differently too, it was more like Jin-ah don’t stop.”

“Check if there is an exit wound,” You spoke, getting down to business. Jin felt around the back of your leg. “If not this might get a little more complicated.”

“Like it wasn’t complicated enough,” he muttered as he continued to feel up and down the back of your thigh. 

“This isn’t foreplay Jin. There is a hole in my lower body”

“That sounds awfully a lot like foreplay.”

“You’re right, that does sound like foreplay.”

“Found it!” 

You hissed painfully as he indeed found the exit wound. He looked down between your bodies and gave you an upside-down grin. “I am nothing if not an attentive lover.”

You began directing Seokjin on how to treat the wound as you slowly tried to give yourself the morphine shot. It was the scariest thing but you got through it with gritted teeth and bruised arms. 

Relaxing against a soft pile of clothes in the trunk you looked up, eyes following Seokjin’s long legs in the puffy suit. You couldn’t resist and found yourself patting the roundness of his bottom. 

“Are you serious right now. You could lose a leg if you bump me.”

“You’re wrapping gauze around my leg Jin, not performing open-heart surgery,” you muttered, “Plus I am going numb from either the blood loss or the drugs. I am not sure. So take the whole leg off if it’s less trouble.” You giggled smacking his butt again, “You know I think you look better this way. If you looked like this you would truly be talking out your ass.”

Seokjin liked this side of you, it reminded him of the time you all had drinks after dish duty. You both talked exaggeratedly about the male and female lead and the plot holes in the drama storyline. 

“Shush I am working, no more touching or talking about my glorious behind.”

As the morphine took the searing pain from your head thoughts and images filled the space. The man you shot, his face there gasping as he bled out. A sick feeling bloomed in your chest like a drop of food coloring in water. It spread making you feel incredibly ill.

You hadn’t realized you were crying, a complete mess of broken sobs and thick sniffles. Seokjin took one of your hands and squeezed it, having finished the bandage and held you to his chest, “Let’s take a quick rest and then we will think about moving okay.”

Unable to answer you buried your face into his broad chest trying to muffle your screams. As the gunshot rang out over and over again flashes of a bloody hand reached out to you. The wet gasps as he choked on his own blood and the fear he expressed as you physically saw the candle that was his life slowly burn out. The panic was hitting you hard and you couldn’t breathe. 

Jin didn’t know what to do to help and in his own panic he started singing.

It’s not that I believe it But that I want to try holding out Because this is All that I can do

The words, desperate and quiet, tickled your ears in a whisper against your hair. There was nothing else he could do, there was no inhaler in your bag. This was his moment to prove he changed, he won’t shy away or run anymore, not from you, or life, or his military enlistment. He was going to push further until finally, he wasn’t scared anymore.

Yeah it’s my truth It’s my truth I will be covered with wounds all over But it’s my fate It’s my fate  Still, I want to struggle and fight

Your body slowly relaxed against his and you fell asleep, exhausted from the events and the physical pain your body was in.

~

Jungkook kept running until he reached the meeting point. The soldiers caught up and sighed in annoyance. Their walkie was glitching and they haven’t received the last few transmissions.

“Captain Won-Shik, we don’t know if they returned?”

“Cadet Tae-U. We got to keep moving. Y/N isn’t dumb. She would have led Seokjin home.” 

Captain Won-Shik huffed, “Come on we risk more lives staying out here exposed like this. This isn’t some soap or drama. This is real life and you know we follow protocol. We don’t risk more lives than necessary, and right now we are risking lives.” 

The Captain walked off, “We just saved this young man and you want to endanger him yet again on an assumption that they aren’t safe.”

Jungkook hated how right the captain of the squad was, telling himself not to risk his life so foolishly. It felt weird being protected and not being the one going above and beyond. The old him would have sworn it was his duty to go out there and find you, to bring you back safe. But he finally felt like he was nobody and had no obligations.

It killed him not knowing whether you were safe and yet he has finally given himself the choice. Not what was expected of him, not what he thought people wanted him to do. No longer trying to push, to lead, to make a good impression. He was free of the burden. Free of expectations.

He turned that burden onto himself to bare alone. Everyone expected him to pick up any slack. Jungkook knew deep down that this wasn’t the case but the realization now hit him full force. He understood now how much he stretched himself thin for others.

[Part 1]  [Part 26] [Part 28] [Tag Yourself Here]

Tags:  @hi-itstt​​  @bubbletae7​​ @lovemusicandotps​​ @taetaebq​​ @seveniefive​​ @w0lfqu33n​​ @anaiss97​​ @moccahobi​​ @maddymal​​ @lilacdreams-00​​ @lethargicalyssa​​ @knjkitten​​ @pieislife​​ @bunnyboyenthusiast​​  @vividwoosan​​ @seesawsmin-flower​​ @tinyunknownflower​​ @gguksfilter​​ @fawnzilla​​  @passionate-love-57911​​ @btrombley13​

[deltaengineering]

Fall Anime 2019 Part 4: also, he has a gun for a head

Beastars

So here’s the CG anime that everyone for some reason decided way in advance would be the best show of the season, more or less by default. I was very skeptical of this for a multitude of reasons. First of all, that is a bad name for a show and you can’t convince me otherwise. It’s actually even worse because you’re supposed to write it in all caps, but I refuse. Second, it has a terribly on the nose conceit in which all sorts of animals live together in a high school setting and it’s all metaphorical ‘n shit. The main character is a wolf but get this, he’s actually all sensitive and quiet! Yeah, this is definitely rated D for Deep. And finally it’s by Orange, the CG studio that got an inordinate amount of acclaim for making Houseki no Kuni, the show that everyone thinks looks great and finally made CG anime worthwhile (actual real fact: HnK does not look great most of the time and CG anime was worthwhile well before it). 

But enough about my preconceptions since Beastars is... pretty good, actually. If you ignore the setting, which is indeed terribly on the nose. And there’s not much else to say about the story so far besides it. However, it looks significantly better than Houseki no Kuni because it actually has really good character animation throughout instead of a one-minute action scene with flashy spinny camera tricks every other episode. The directing’s strong too, even if the show conspicuously mainly consists of obvious manga panels. I’m still not too hot on the animal stuff but the general writing seems to be sufficiently competent it would work simply on a character level. So I don’t love it, but it seems solid enough to see if it goes somewhere with its “Zootopia but also Beverly Hills 90210 but also they eat each other sometimes″ plot.

Rifle is Beautiful

Remember the whole “anime about some assorted anime girls joining a club doing an oddly specific activity” thing? This is another one of those, and now it’s about air rifle sports shooting. Except it’s not about air rifle sports shooting because that’s apparently way too violent, so they use rifles that look like exactly like air rifles but are actually based on lasers or really bright flashlights (they can’t keep their bullshit straight between scenes, sorry) instead. I just don’t think “girls doing activities” anime should blatantly misrepresent their subject matter like that, you know? With the possible exception of idol anime that is, ain’t nobody who wants to hear about that shit. Apart from that it’s nothing special, so if you are really into air rifles and wish to watch an anime that’s not about those, knock yourself out. It goes through a whole “club needs 5 members” arc in the first half of the first episode, so I really can’t say where it goes next. Nowhere much, I would guess.

Oh right, there’s one more thing: They frequently render the bodies in CG and the heads in traditional drawings, and they do it every time when they’d actually have to draw a rifle otherwise. It’s a weird effect that I think I haven’t seen anywhere else before, and it’s not great but also not terrible. And it’s the most interesting thing about the entire show.

Kabukicho Sherlock

“Let’s take a bunch of public domain characters and put them into a hip modern setting” seems to be its own genre at the moment, and not only because the BBC did that with S. Holmes, Esq. already. Obviously this show is influenced by that (besides other public domain namedroppers like Bungou Stray Dogs), mostly in Watson and his relationship with Sherlock, but Sherlock-san is rather different here; he’s neither the classic Victorian bohemian nor the abrasive sociopath of the BBC version, and tends more towards a bumbling 90s pop culture version of autism and/or general wackiness here. These two are surrounded by a bunch of campy transvestites for some reason, and I’m not quite sure whether I’m supposed to find this particular stereotype offensive or empowering this week, but it sure is annoying. And it has the same character designer as Joker Game, so if you like chiseled, angular anime men, you’re in for a treat here - even if they tend to wear a lot of makeup and dresses sometimes. I don’t know man, it seems sort of okay-ish for the most part but it’s neither as funny as they think, nor as weird as they think, nor is the murder of the week intriguing at all. Oh yeah, he’s hunting noted public domain character Jack the Ripper. Because of course he is.

 Shin Chuuka Ichiban!

I am told this is the sequel to episode 19 of a 52-episode anime TV show from 1997. Okay. I am also told to not dare watch this without the important setup therein, which makes me think I should pay less attention to what I’m told because understanding Shin Chuuka Ichiban and its backstory is not hard at all. Kid is superawesome cooking champion in ancient China and goes around clowning on lesser cooks, got it. It’s not a complicated setup and it’s not a complicated genre either: This seems to be mostly about sick shounen cooking duels. Besides the setting, the main difference between this and Shokugeki no Soma seems to be that SnS goes for ridiculous and Chuuka Ichiban goes for epic - which is to say that it fancies itself emotional as well. Apart from that it’s what you’d expect from a cooking shounen, big moves, big reactions, huge twists and so on. One notable thing is that this show looks really, really nice. Production I.G seems to be establishing a sideline in taking stuff from the 90s and updating it with smoother animation and shinier lighting, while keeping the overall look intact; They did it for Mahoujin Guru Guru, and this looks much the same. Still, I’m just fundamentally not really interested in what appears to be a very straightforward cooking shounen from the 90s.

Assassins Pride

Straight from the Department of Chuuni, we have this light novel masterpiece about a cool as fuck teenage assassin who teleports behind u and nothin personells fools all day. He then meets a princess he’s supposed to off but just kinda decides not to, probably because she seems to be smitten by his m’lady act. Now he has to use his sick skillz to keep them both alive. It’s awful and terrible and no good and also kind of adorable. This truly is the most 13 AND A HALF MOM years old anime in a while, and it’s not even isekai! The writing’s just so amateurish and corny you can’t help but smile when princesses exposit their backstory for no reason while being accosted by pumpkin monsters (without knowing that Awessassin McCooldude happens to be listening in, which is certainly convenient). Or when the episode ends with the man just reading the synopsis of the show out again, in case you were too fascinated by this plot to pay attention to what it’s about. Yeah I’m not going to watch this in a thousand years, but it sure made me chuckle. Your mileage may vary.

Mugen no Juunin - Immortal

Speaking of 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔢𝔱𝔦𝔢𝔰 𝔢𝔡𝔤𝔢, another anime adaptation of Blade of the Immortal appeared! You know, the manga for the cultured and historically minded guro fan. The first episode of Blade of the Immortal runs with this and is an arthouse production that someone most definitely directed the shit out of. I don’t think I’ve seen this much directing since, well, Sarazanmai, but “Ikuhara amounts of directing” is pretty much the idea here. And most of the time it even works! The quickly edited, disorienting style gives episode 1 a feeling closer to horror than to a cool swordmen action show, and that really brings out the best in the material, which is grotesque splatter bordering on the comical - It’s somehow a better Junji Ito anime than the actual Junji Ito anime. I think it tries too hard in a few places, but at least it does try.

But then I watched the second episode and that one’s a fairly conventional splatter-comedy swordin’ anime. I am not at all pleased with this development. The third episode was better again and seemed to split the difference between 1 and 2, even if it mostly uses the tricky editing to save on effort in the action –  I would much prefer actually readable fights and the wacky mannerisms in the more psychological stuff, thank you very much. Based on episode 1 I thought we might have something special here, but as of episode 3 I’d already merely call it pretty decent. I guess I’ll still stick with it but man, that’s a real bummer.

No Guns Life

No Guns Life is a neo-noir thriller about a guy who has a gun for a head. That’s fuckin rad and exactly the kind of silliness I am totally down for. He also has a gun for a hand, and there’s also some battle nun’s who carry revolvers with two cylinders, so in short I think the title is false advertising. This sounds very wacky (and it is), but it also takes its noir very seriously, down to details more wannabe neo-noirs tend to neglect (like being set right after a big war). The look and feel is pretty excellent, with sharp design and high-contrast artwork, and the music goes all in on the moody saxophone as you’d expect. And there’s some really adorable “look mom, I’m writing” stuff about how Man With Gun For A Head really “needs someone to pull his trigger” and so on (which is, as the astute reader might remember, at the back of his head). It feels like a throwback but then I can’t really think of many 80s/90s shows like this, so it’s actually more like the sort of faux-retro idea Trigger/Imaishi would come up with on a lark. Trigger/Imaishi would, of course, make a far worse anime out of it, so it’s all good. Well, it has some pacing problems and as always it’s a fine line between amusingly camp and not so amusingly camp anymore, but No Guns Life seems to have enough real qualities that it can probably stand on its own even when its conceptual gimmick eventually doesn’t suffice anymore. I give it a two gun’s up.

Hoshiai no Sora / Stars Align

And finally, here’s an anime about middle schooler softboys playing a tennis just as soft as themselves, while being henpecked by the elites on the girl’s team. This is not an “actual” sports anime though: for starters, it’s not based on some shounen manga and is an anime original with quite some staff pedigree instead. It’s also more of a character drama that already goes to some surprisingly real places by the end of episode 1, reminiscent of the recent and quite good Run with the Wind. Furthermore, it looks delicious, with minimalist but distinctive and varied character designs and animation that’s both extremely detailed for a TV anime and also not trying to shove that fact into your face with flashy stunt cuts. In short, this show seems very simple at first glance but every aspect of it just oozes quality. If nothing else, it’s already worth watching just for the excellent ending sequence where the characters show off their “best” dance moves and the chunky student council president dunks on everyone. This one caught me by surprise and it’s an easy pick for most promising show of the season.

[camillesfm]

。· . ˙ ⌈ alva bratt + cis female + she / her + the  intangible concept ⌋  yo ,  have  you  meet  that  KOOK  ,  camille 'cj' petersen ,  yet ?  — no ?  well ,  to  give  you  a  little  heads  up  before  you  do  ,  they’re  a  TWENTY   year  old ,  PRE-LAW STUDENT  ,  and  have  been  living  in  coston  for  TWENTY . since  i’ve  known  them  ,  they’ve  reminded  me  of PALE PINK POINTE SHOES , CHAINS MADE OF WHITE CLOVERS , A PURPLE SKY JUST BEFORE SUNRISE , STEADY WAVES CRASHING AT LOW TIDE , AND SHATTERED & SCATTERED GLASS . usually  they’re  quite  LEVELHEADED  &  THOUGHTFUL  but  just  make  sure  you  keep  an  eye  out  for  them  around  town  because  i  heard  can  be  quite  RETICENT  &  ALOOF  as  well  so  here’s  hoping  they  aren’t  the  ones  to  undo  this  whole  peace  pact  they  have  going  on  this  summer .  but  just  between  you  &  me ,  i  kinda  hope it  all  falls  apart .  the  rivalry  keeps  this  whole  boring  town  interesting . –– this is cj . . . let’s just . . . dive into this mess ! 

𝐁 𝐀 𝐂 𝐊 𝐆 𝐑 𝐎 𝐔 𝐍 𝐃 .

scarlett petersen is a name known statewide, as she’s the best corporate lawyer on the east coast, clever as the devil and twice as pretty with long blonde hair often pinned into a sleek ponytail. david petersen got his degree at vanderbilt university, moving on to get his phd at unc chapel hill where he could never quite shake that carolina blue. he’s been sitting chancellor for the past six years in tandem with a long term sports-medicine, neuroscience research project that studies the long term affects of brain damage in athletes in contact sports. they both hail from old money families, and long lines of success are continued in two people who hold appearance and accomplishment far above humility or even . . . . humanity lol. they’re good people, really . . . just not really the parenting type.

which is unfortunate! as.  well into their marriage, they had twins, caleb, first, and camille, ten minutes later. bright eyed and blonde haired, the perfect petersen babies were angels in their infancy, and it was easy to parent them . . . especially when they were paying someone else to do it.

caleb and camille grew up under the watchful eye of a rosy-cheeked nanny. think julie andrews as nanny in eloise. they were happy, but lonely, though you’d never guess it by their wide smiles in cuddled family portrait christmas cards. for all anyone else knew, scarlett and david were perfect parents, raising two beautiful children who they loved more than anything . . . but behind that iron gated entryway to a house on the coast was another story.

they liked their kids, sure, but whether or not they loved them was another question entirely. camille, growing up to be the spitting image of scarlett, was liked in the way a rare porcelain artifact was. she was a beautiful thing to behold; seen, not spoken to. shown off, not interacted with in anyway. held with delicate hands and passed around as a humble brag: look at this precious thing i’ve brought into the world. i bet mine’s better than yours. 

but as time passed, the novelty of having children seemed to wear off, and they were moving to the next big thing, the next big step in their careers. they weren’t around when camille began going by cj because it was easier for little voices to say. they weren’t around when blonde ringlets relaxed and grew darker. they weren’t around when she started to develop a personality of her own, interests of her own, talents of her own. christmas cards would go out, but rarely were they all together on christmas morning. thanksgivings were often spent with grandparents, as their parents worked through the holiday. they spent more and more time away from coston, leaving cj and caleb in nanny’s capable hands.

but life goes on, and sometimes it was easy to forget that it was abnormal not to have your parents around. as a youngin, cj was interested in everything. she took a liking to soccer and lacrosse, painting and drawing, piano and guitar . . . but somewhere in between a blue mat and pale pink pointe shoes, she found her thing.

it was obvious, from an early age, that cj was one hell of a dancer. disciplined and precise when she needed to be. creative and passionate when it called for it. gymnastics trained her strength, ballet trained her patience, contemporary pushed her limits with creativity, partner work taught her teamwork. dance was very clearly her best thing and her favorite thing.

her parents only ever attended recitals when it didn’t conflict with anything else on their schedules and when it was classical ballet. dance was a frivolous thing for them, but for cj it was everything. being a naturally shy kid, naturally timid in the shadow of her last name, she became a completely different person on stage who dominated a spotlight . . . without even needed a literal spotlight. ultimately, this is what she spent her life doing. monday through thursday evenings, dance. competitions and performances on the weekends. if neither were happening, you’d catch her teaching classes at coston’s local studio.

it’s what truly made her happy, but that wasn’t something her parents understood. caleb and nanny did, sure, but her parents? not one bit. someone would ask what she wanted to be when she grew up, and if dance was mentioned, she’d be cut off mid-sentence. they didn’t want to hear about it because it wasn’t logical. you can’t make a career out of it. it didn’t help much that her brother was the ideal child in that realm, charming and on a path to success in the medical field. they still had questionable motives, but they favored nonetheless.

sometimes it was a blessing; sometimes it was a curse. when she could slip under the radar, she was grateful, but it seemed that her parents had a keen eye for her screwups. any chance they had, they’d use to scold her or nudge her away from the pointe shoes.

so cj spent a lot of time being pristine in the way that was expected of her, never letting anyone know too much about her, only keeping a few friends close enough to really know her. she stayed out of trouble, kept up exceptional grades, smiled and nodded when necessary, and began catering to the idea that she’d go to law school, a fate pre-determined by her mother no doubt. 

nowadays, she attends brown university, pre-law. she’s a picturesque ivy league gal with a dark academia aesthetic when at school, but there’s a restlessness lingering under the surface. even she’s doing what her parents require of her, she never seems to live up to their unrealistic expectations. we rly do be . . . . waiting for her to have a complete breakdown . . . . aklsdfjha

𝐏 𝐄 𝐑 𝐒 𝐎 𝐍 𝐀 𝐋 𝐈 𝐓 𝐘 .

miss camille . . . better known around town as cj . . . is, above all else, the picture of serenity. she’s levelheaded and calm, and patient as all get out which is probably why she’s so damned accustomed to just going with what her parents thought of her. she’s really great to have in a crisis because very few things cause that steady nature of hers to crumble, and because she’s honestly. . . quietly very maternal. putting the needs of others before her own comes naturally.

she’s quiet and shy, yes, but just because she doesn’t speak doesn’t mean she doesn’t listen. she listens and sees and is . . . quite observant. there’s a way about her that notices the little things, which makes her quite thoughtful when it comes to the people she loves. if you’re lucky enough to be close to her, you can bet she quietly takes notes of little habits and favorites and carefully uses them to idk love ya better ya feel??

reticent comes from the fact that she doesn’t often let people get close to her. the way her parents treated her and caleb growing up has taken. .. . a toll for sure because honestly she’s terrified of disappointing people by shattering the mirror of perfection and revealing too much about herself that’s unexpected

aloof comes from the way she’s calm and quiet . . . and how that sometimes translates as apathy . . . on top of that she’s very daydreamy like she is That Bitch who is staring out of the window producing a whole move in her head which sometimes causes her to not hear when people are talking to her . . . cue the ‘hm? what?’ tuning back in

when i say cj is a different person when she’s dancing . . . . i mean it. like i REALLY mean it. she’s confident and expressive. her choreography tests the limits of tradition. she pushes boundaries when it comes to the physicality of performances. like u rly look at her being quiet and to herself in the corner at a country club event and then see her performing like she invented contemporary and ur like . .. . are u SURE that’s the same girl

people who know her most know her as warm. when she opens up, getting past the shy, she can be a little goofy, definitely has avery creative way about her, wants to know that you’re okay and if you’re not, how can she help ya know!! 

has a black cat named lucky because ya know . . . black cats are bad luck . . . ha ha ha ha . . . get it

the ‘j’ in cj is for her middle name . . . but no one really knows what her middle name is . . . except family and close, close friends 

absolutely hates the energy of the pogue/kook rivalry and thinks violence is most cERTAINLY not the way to go

often times found by the shoreline at night, just a little ways off from the petersen estate because she likes the way the waves sound as they roll in. it helps her think

is trying to make the best of law school by studying to become a defense attorney and she likes it! sort of! really, she just wants to dance for as long as she can and ultimately open up her own studio

definitely believes in wishing stars

bad case of insomnia

has a finsta dedicated to lucky

has a dance insta too . . . . but that’s lowkey bc her parents can’t know about it

please for the love of god watch this because charity and cj have the same energy

this also has cj energy

so does this . . . classical is fun when it’s telling a story and she loves a good pas de deaux but otherwise meh

my girl is physically . .. QUITE strong

says sorry WAY too often

incessant need to prove herself, prove her worth, since her parents never seem to find it

loves caleb sfm but will thump him in the forehead for mentioning he’s older

overachiever . . . . yikes

ABSOLUTELY burns the candle at both ends

idk if y’all watched high school musical the musical the series but gina . . . . . ..  minus the ‘mean girl’ plot they tried . . .. is v cj and bitch i hate to say it but neville longbottom??? also a cj mood LMAO

OK THAT’S IT THAT’S ALL THERE WE GO IT’S DONE I’M DONE GBYYYYYE BABIIIIE

[creativenicocorner]

5, 10, 19?

Aaay! Thank you so much!! @dreamcrow

5. What’s a crackship you love?

As a crack ship gfdkgsd oh man, my heart is set on Blinky/Strickler on that one ahaha. I already adore whatever dynamics they have together on screen - or even when referencing one another!! And honestly I think they’d make great friends!! Heck they could bond on Roman pennies, and mechanical engineering (seeing as Blinky helped build Jim’s Vespa, and Strickler made a super accurate replica of Merlin’s amulet) and don’e get me started on the quick witted beautiful back and forth they’d have

Once tried writing a Good Omens AU with all this in mind, but never quite had the energy to finish it. Let’s face is the two of them have great Aziraphale / Crowley energy haha  

10. Mutual pining or enemies to friends to lovers?

Oh man oh man, mutual pining. It leaves so much potential open!! Heck even the enemies to friends to lovers could happen within the umbrella of mutual pining (especially if one of the two isn’t ready to admit to their pining -wink- ) 

That and I’m just a sucker for two people being so equally into one another but just, not quite having the confidence to learn how the other feels. It’s so juicy and can be played oh so deliciously in so many fun ways!

19. What’s your favorite character head canon?

Weeeell there’s certainly one HC I’ve been hinting at for quite some time and have been meaning to make a proper post about - but here is what I’d like to call the Meat and Potatoes (super lean edition) of the Etruscan Strickler HC ヽ(o♡o)/

(please keep in mind I’m not a qualified historian, or anthropologist, or archeologist - but an avid lover of history )

So the Etruscans and the peoples of Etruria have been around for a loooong time, in fact there are some who believe the Etruscan language is one of the building blocks of many italic languages. And for a good amount of centuries they thrived! 

Then Rome happened, which was perhaps inevitable seeing as they were on the same peninsula - and because of that the size of Etruria changed depending on which century map you’re looking at. And although at some point Etruria spanned from Umbria to just grazing into the region of Lazio - its biggest consistent chunk existed in what we know today as modern Tuscany.

Because of this I should perhaps make it clear that I believe Strickler came out through the fetch after 32BCE during the already decline of the Etruscan language (in which Etruria is already absorbed and occupied by the Roman Empire). In fact by then only a select few, unless they were Etruscan, knew the language Marcus Terentius Varro for example, the Roman Emperor Claudius (though he probably learned it from his first wife, Plautia Urgulanilla who is believed to be Etruscan).

Now I hear what you’re probably thinking: But his/ his familiar’s name is Waltolomew Strickler? That’s not very Latin sounding for a name. 

 And you’re absolutely right!

However, Etruscans (despite occupation and absorption into the Roman Empire - and more so before) were known to be seafaring, trade was very important from Egypt to what we know today as the Greek islands and to the northern coast. Import and export was important and (as well as fighting pirates, but that’s a very fun wiki rabbit hole to fall through another time haha), and with trade comes awesome exposure to other cultures and other peoples from that culture! 

Case in point the vague similarities and non similarities between certain deities between the Roman Greek and Etruscan Pantheon! Of course each pantheon has its own variants and deities that don’t exist in another pantheon, as well as different takes on certain heroes i.e the Greek Heracles, and the Etruscan Hercle -which through a lot of found art, is perceived to be a very popular hero for a number of reasons. 

I could also go into the account of Etruscan soothsayers being well praised even by Cicero - but that’s another rabbit hole for another time - as well as a reason I like to indulge in the fact that Strickler can come across as rather superstitious at times! 

But I’m getting off topic XP TRADE we’re talking about trade, and it was important be it Egypt to the Balkans 

And with that in mind it isn’t impossible for a Northern Germanic man to fall in love with an Etruscan woman.  

1) women were treated far better in Etruria, as opposed to Rome and Athens. In fact Romans thought they were more promiscuous because of how freely and equally they were treated. 

 2) Germanic tribes treated their woman on a similar level of equality. 

 3)   As a culture of partnership, heck we are still discovering more and more about the Etruscans but we can make educated guesses through their sarcophagus covers (the reclining lovers and so on). This celebration of life lived even in the face of death. 

Very on brand Strickler imo, and if we from history can see how they treated marriage in death we can assume how marriage was treated in life. As loving and equal as possible. In short Strickler grew up with that respecting women juice (at least compared to Roman and Athenian standards) 

So name wise, Waltolomew Strickler can come from the Norther Father’s name. Vel for short, as names beginning with ‘w’ aren’t very common in Latin, Etruscan, or Italian. In fact if you go to Italy today and introduce yourself as idk, William -  there’s a good chance they’ll pronounce William as [Vee-lee-am]. 

However in Latin the use of ‘v’ often replaces the ‘w’ and ‘u’ sounds. u = v and a double u = vv (aaay get it?) And just like that a VValtolomevv is named haha

Enter the name Vel slowly over time becoming Walt over time. I could go on for paragraphs, but I know I explained the whole congnomen thing in Terpsichore, I’d have to re-check and I fear this is already getting…ah…crazy long so I’ll try and wrap it up ^^’’

Initially the real Waltolomew was supposed to be left in the woods to die at the mercy of nature because it didn’t look like the infant wouldn’t survive anyways, but when they went back to check in the woods to find who we know as Strickler the host family Strickler saw it nothing short than an auspicious miracle of the gods, or that their child managed to strike a deal with Vanth (a death god), there’s a lot of theories between the family members to try and explain how Walter’s survival is possible - but all the same Waltolomew is raised in a rather loving family!  

There’s the quiet and slightly distant Northern Father (who is occasionally homesick) and mainly tends to the olive grove. The Mother that settles the finances. The Uncle that runs shipptrades and sells the family olive oil. And, of course, The Grandmother who is very proud of living Etruria thank you very much, openly mocking romans, quick with an opinion, morally gray, with a sparkle of mischief - and someone who pretty much elbowed her way into the very serious child Waltolomew’s heart in such a way the changeling wasn’t sure if she knew his secret or even cared! 

Eventually Roman payments became too steep, the Northern Father racked up a bit of debt and was sent into the army…the Northern Father never returns presumed dead in action. The resentment of Romans grows even more in the Strickler household because of this. 

Which is one of the reasons why later in life Stricklander chooses to occasionally pass as ‘British’ aka one of the peoples the Romans couldn’t occupy and conquer, as opposed to siding with a people who absorbed the population of his home peninsula that would later be known as Italy.

 In fact I believe after being forced to work at Hadrian’s wall (which was a laughable failure, although as a Cesare Hadrian was well praised), and returning to find his host family home repossessed by Romans Walter would flee to Gaul (another location where Romans couldn’t conquer).

It wouldn’t be long until the Romans called on a 13 ½ year old Waltolomew to enter into the military just in time for the Hadrian’s Wall debacle. Where Waltolomew grows a respect for the peoples of the British isles for being able to hold off Rome for so long and so much. Afterwards he returns to the peninsula to find his home repossessed by Romans, his grandmother having passed, and his mother and uncle closer to the port and not doing so hot. This spurns Strickler’s dislike for Romans more, an incident occurs, and Waltolomew flees to Gaul (another area famous for being able to hold off the Romans), but this time to join the Gumm-Gumms 

More on that another time cause ooo boy this is a long response XP I’m sorry this got so out of hand!! 

I wanted to add my thoughts as to why and how I came to the conclusion of this HC but like I said this response is crazy long already so I’ll keep it short (for now) to: That classic ‘Roman Nose profile’ of his, the pale olive skin tone, the vague roman/greek helmet he has in his office, how his Italian VA did not do an English accent in the dub, and - uh, well, I like the idea of it haha

Oh! And here’s a picture of a supermarket outside of Sarteano named ‘Etrusco’ Look at that lil face! It probably doesn’t mean much, but it does spark joy haha

Thank you so much for your questions!! I deeply appreciate it!!♥(ˆ⌣ˆԅ) 

[allthefilmsiveseenforfree]

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

Quentin Tarantino is a divisive fellow. Love him or hate him, you have to admit, he belongs to a short list of contemporary directors who have earned true auteur status. I really really hated his last offering, The Hateful Eight, but my hopes were higher for his 9th film, Once Upon a Time ... in Hollywood. This movie has everything. Leonardo DiCaprio as a washed up actor, known for playing a cowboy in a 50′s tv show; Brad Pitt as his chilled-out stunt double/errands man; Margot Robbie as the ill-fated Sharon Tate; and a combination of 60s tunes and bitchin grooves that make the summer of 1969 come alive in the way only Tarantino can achieve. There is a lot, and I mean a LOT going on here, so is this more of a cool pulp fiction classic, or a hateful way to spend an afternoon? Well...

While its pacing is definitely uneven (and definitely indulgent), I loved this movie. I loved it so so much. The atmosphere, the humor, the creeping dread, the sun-slick sticky sweet days of a California summer - it’s all here, and it’s all being acted out by incredible actors who are really giving it their all. This may not be QT’s best, but I would argue it is the best example of the particular kind of leisurely, sharp-tongued fun that he does so very well.

The film is divided into two lopsided sections: the first 2 hours take place in February 1969, and the final 45 minutes take place in August 1969. Rick Dalton (DiCaprio) is trying to shake up his image by taking a new acting gig more seriously. Cliff Booth, his stunt man (Pitt), is running errands for Dalton and runs into a hippie girl (Margaret Qualley) who takes him back to the Manson family’s ranch. Sharon Tate (Margot Robbie) is also running errands and stops into a theater playing her film, The Wrecking Crew. It’s all a slice of life, setting up a mood and a time and place in a way that makes you feel nostalgic for a time that you (in my case) were never alive for. 

Some thoughts:

One thing I loved was all the tv, movie, commercials, and songs included as artifacts to specifically build a sense of time and place. All of these things are woven into the fabric and the language of the film seamlessly - as a rabid consumer of culture, there’s no one better to distill and cultivate those cultural artifacts into a feeling than QT. Say what you will, QT is damn good at creating a #mood. I love all the details about how 1969 feels. Also these fake Rick Dalton movies are incredible. 

I love seeing a couple of QT’s usual suspects - Michael Madsen! Zoe Bell (who was also the stunt coordinator on the film)!

I wish I had a gif of this Hullabaloo sequence on repeat behind my eyelids at all times, it brings me such great joy.

THIS MOVIE FEATURES THE BEST GOOD DOG OF ALL THE GOOD DOGS. Cliff’s dog Brandy is a giant red pit bull who is perfect and beautiful and so smart and so brave and I love her so much and want to bring her home with me and give her many face rubs and homemade dog treats. There are moments in which Brandy is in danger, but I promise you, Brandy emerges from the encounter A-OK.

What shocked me the most was probably how funny this was. Much, MUCH funnier than his last few movies. Also, I don’t think I heard the n-word once! Is this a kinder, softer QT? Hard to say.

I always thought Austin Powers’s outfits were an exaggeration, but based on Roman Polanski’s going-out outfit, I guess the whole velvet suit and lace cravat thing was very unfortunately real. 

Speaking of, one detail I liked best is that Roman Polanski as a character doesn’t have like, any lines at all. Because NO ONE gives a shit what he has to say. Good call, QT.

No offense, but in what universe is Damian Lewis hot enough to play Steve Motherfucking McQueen? 

Sharon Tate also has an excellent little grey floofy dog. There are many good dogs present and accounted for. 

I know LA is a car city, but man...there are a lot of driving scenes. Like....too many driving scenes. This movie is 2 hr 41 min long. And don’t get me wrong, those long shots filled with 1969-era radio ads and songs and long, meandering drives through the Hollywood hills DO set the mood in a way that nothing else can but, I feel like we could have done some editing here nevertheless.

Sexuality is a confusing thing, man. I am happily married to Wife, and frankly I don’t feel the same kind of gut-level “oh no he/she is hot” reaction to ANYone like I did in my 20s anymore but. B U T. Shirtless, scar-covered Brad Pitt smoking a cigarette in work gloves may be the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. That says more about me than it does about Brad Pitt, but like. Human beauty. What a time.

Mike Moh’s performance as Bruce Lee is both hilarious and extraordinarily committed in a visceral, physical way. His whole scene is a highlight of the film.

I’m half wondering if Trudi (Julia Butters), the young method actress who makes such an impression on Rick, is partially based in Leonardo DiCaprio’s own experiences as a child actor. He seems like the type to be uh. Real intense about THE CRAFT.

For as funny as most of the film is, my blood did run cold when Charles Manson (Damon Herriman) sees Sharon Tate for the first time. Oh also, lest you be misled like I was, Charles Manson is barely in this. The trailer makes it seem like he will be a heavy presence in the film, and the shadow of him certainly looms large, but for actual screentime, he barely cracks 2 minutes.

A small but significant thing - the footage of Sharon Tate’s film, The Wrecking Crew, has not been altered to put Margot Robbie in it. Instead, the real Sharon Tate’s performance is shown on screen. I appreciated her memory being preserved in this way. 

Nothing takes me out of a QT movie faster than all these gross ass dirty feet. All of these hippie girls in the Manson family hate shoes and they live on a fucking ranch where everything is covered in dirt, it’s disgusting. I have no problem if YOU have a foot fetish, but my god man, does subjecting us to it have to be part of it??

My favorite line in the whole movie might be “Give me evil sexy Hamlet” because that is a vibe I wish there was more of in the world.

In many ways, this movie is a story about friendship and the ways it changes and guides our lives. The deep, intimate friendship between Rick and Cliff is almost like a marriage, and there’s a real sense of respect and care that they have for each other. 

About 2 hours into the movie, I was thinking “Wow, you know, this really hasn’t been very violent at all for a QT movie” but then...

I really enjoyed the stinger at the end, featuring Rick hawking Red Apple cigarettes. 

Did I Cry? At the very, very end. Mainly for Sharon Tate and the senseless violence that was done to her. This film is a love letter to her, a kind woman who did not deserve her fate. 

This features a lot of QT classics with a lot of the rough edges sanded off. Oh sure there’s a lot of the fuck-words thrown around, and there is some sizable violence towards the end, but the whole thing feels downright wholesome in comparison to a bloodbath like Kill Bill or even Inglorious Basterds. QT is very good at what he does, and if you can handle a more meandering, softer touch, there’s no better way to spend a few hours at the movies than letting the magic of a Hollywood long gone sweep you away. 

If you liked this review, please consider reblogging or subscribing to my Patreon! For as low as $1, you can access bonus content and movie reviews, or even request that I review any movie of your choice.

[the-little-prophet]

BDRP Questionnaire 2019

Posting this on Charlie since I actually talked about him quite a bit! Let’s gooooo

Characters: Berlioz, Hades, Kiara, Nala, Andrina, Merida, Charlie, Apollo, John, Su, Ashleigh, Nemo, Jun

Pick one of your characters and talk about their growth (we recommend choosing an older character, but it’s up to you!) What about their story has surprised you? What are you proud of? How have they changed from their original inception to now?

This one goes out to Charlie. I pitched Charlie very deceptively-- claiming he was a prophet, aligning him, at first, with Calliope, making it look like Charlie’s magic was of the classical, Cassandra-inspired kind. But all along, I knew that what I wanted Charlie to be was more of this sci-fi/fantasy blend as an homage to his movie’s sci-fi bend too. This year, I got to actually reveal that Charlie is a time traveler after two years!! This is very exciting for me! I’ve enjoyed being able to lean into Charlie’s new image systems with this reveal, even though I’m out of my depth and breaking like 67 different time travel rules, probably lol. Still, it’s been great to take him to that place, and to invent Future-Charlie as both a deux ex machina and an expression of identity/choice/free will etc etc. I did not have Future-Charlie in mind when I created Charlie, so that was something I was proud of coming up with!

Pick another character and talk a little about where you WANT them to go. What are your plans for them going into the new year?

I’m going to talk about Nemo if only because everyone else feels like a spoiler lol. Nemo, as a relatively new character though, is still full-speed-ahead on his initial goals that I outlined for him in his application. Now that Nemo’s been established in the school and he has this little group of buddies, I want:

To focus on his wing. I want Nemo to push himself, get himself in a spot of trouble, potentially injure himself.

Reveal his wings to at least one mundus friend

Continuing to infuse his posts with body image issues. This is a slow build kind of plot that really is like...the broth of Nemo’s plot-soup, lol, while training for his placement is the chicken and belonging at school is the noodles….it needs to be this throughline more than like, para a, para b, para c. at least for now.

Pick a thread or a plot that you’re proud of and talk about why you loved it.

I could pick a lot of threads here lol it’s honestly so HARD. But I think I want to shout-out to the Charlie/Jim first kiss thread because it surprised even me and Hannah. We initially planned for the first kiss to be just that-- one kiss, then we done, Jim and Charlie go on to be friends. But like in the best of cases, Jim and Charlie’s palpable chemistry actually informed more of Charlie’s arc and opened up avenues previously closed to me/Charlie since Charlie had been so SHUT to the idea of love. So! I really loved that thread. Also because like, I literally made Charlie experience the big bang after his first kiss. And THAT’S the BEST way to use magic in my opinion. Like when you can infuse magic with an emotional catharsis-- I think the other time I did that super well was similar actually, when Herc kissed Kiki’s cheek and she grew a tree in his room lol. So yeah! Some of my best writing in that thread, amazing chemistry, big surprises. It was an absolute pleasure.

In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 strengths and talk about why you think it’s one of your strengths.

-Image systems. I dragged myself for this, but I think it’s something that really helps me find a character’s voice and make myself excited to RP them! Also, I think it’s what people like about my writing sometimes. Maybe. IDK, lol. -Complex Emotion: I’m stealing this from my mentor who said I’m good at creating complex emotion and so you know its true. My most introverted characters get the bulk of this naturally--they are introspective and feely and give themselves the space to think and feel. But I really want to try to inject more into my extroverted characters. I think I’m doing well for Nemo, who had undiagnosed anxiety and so that informs a lot of his personality in very interesting-- very OPPOSITE-- ways as Berlioz; Nemo struggles with being alone because ‘alone’ means he gets too in his head. That’s been really fun for me and why he’s quickly become one of my fave voices to write (I know, u all thought it was because I am in love with Jimin (true), but no its bc Nemo is an anxious, big feeling baby and he’s always so Alive to me, plus i was made to write a fairy it was always my destiny.)

In terms of your own writing, identify 1-3 areas of improvement.

-Dialogue: PERSONALLY I feel like I’m not great at dialogue. Some posts are better than others and I think I’m good at like…..texting dialogue? IDK. I feel like I struggle in paras though to craft good dialogue. It’s just, rn, average dialogue. Of course not every post needs to have hilarious, punchy, great dialogue. But do my characters sound different? Am I doing all I can to create rhythm and speech patterns? -Filtering: Im being very picky rn, because actually I don’t do this too much, but I do it enough where I’m like, I gotta go read some really stellar writers adn ban myself from using “Feel” and “think” for like a whole month. What I’m talkinga bout is like: Ber realized/ Ber thought / Ber knew. That kind of writing is totally fine, but that’s about it. I need to come up with more creative ways to talk about feelings and abstract concepts!!!

-Character: I know everyone is probably like………….how dare lauryl put this here. But listen. I don’t think I struggle with character on RP. But outside of RP? Oh boy! The THING about RP is you MUST create a character, that’s your vessel for writing here, and so you do all that development plus u got the four years of worldbuilding informing that character, and literally EVERYTHING CHARACTER DRIVEN ITS...THERE IS NO OTHER WAY.  Outside of RP though I think I have struggled because my natural affinity is worldbuilding and shit like that. I’m type 5 baby, I am attracted to characters who let me poke at things I don’t know anything about, like even Jun, part of it really is like, petitions and grocery store management lmfadsofij. SOOOo idk I just need to be able to focus on crafting characters that are compelling vessels for the cool shit I like to do outside of RP.

Pick one of your plots, or even just a character, and come up with a list of 3-5 “mentor texts” where you can look for inspiration or research, then write a short (2-4 sentences) why you picked those texts. JOHN DARLING BREAKS INTO FAERYLAND 1. Call Down the Hawk/Raven Cycle: It’s no coincidence that my reread of Raven Cycle last winter played a pretty big part in inspiring this new version of John. The descriptions of the magical forest Cabeswater and the hunt for Glendower have the same kind of contemporary fantasy vibe that I really like for John. And of course, Ronan’s dream magic is very much intertwined with the faery realm feeling like a dream (and Ashleigh, obviously, as a dark faery who can manipulate them). More than that though, the attention paid to the psyches of each character and how they drive the plot forward is just… /chefs kiss. 2. The Mabinogian: I want to draw from these classic Welsh/British stories and incorporate them in creative ways! Or just as, like, motifs are something. :) I have tried to do this but would like to be a lot more intentional, instead of just being like lmao let me look up some random shit for this one reply~ 3. The Hazel Wood: This book deals with characters coming into the real world from a book world! This kind of goes along with the Mabinogian as I kind of ish want to do something similar, only treating the Mabinogian as a historical, cultural text as opposed to a fiction. This book also focuses a lot on fairy tale tropes (like numbers) which I really want to incorporate in John’s stuff. I want to ideally write some of my own fairy tales-- I have one in mind actually through Ashleigh but it’s related to John too since he’d the scholar of said stories.  

And now, a wishlist!

-Exploring Nemo’s disability. This is slightly challenging for me since we don’t have many fairies, but I’m brainstorming some ideas and hope to really kick it off in January, leading up to his Talent Placement Test.   -I really want to have a lot of town-centric plots for Jun. Would love to rp with the police officers! I want to have Jun try to get some ppl arrested tbh ahah, like, Fflew for loitering, or maybe reporting Mitte. I would love some arch nemeses tbh-- Mitte does seem like a good one. AND I want to submit at least three petitions next semester!! Maybe i should make that two!! Still!! -Do some Bonfamille plots. I already have something I’m really excited about and have already planned here so this is a teaser… -Keep writing essays. The fairies have been great, getting me really inspired to do these.What’s been an amazing mental exercise, and why I cannot stop writing these, is thinking about how the political philosophy of Pixie Hollow informs how it functions: technically, socioculturally etc. It’s really fun for me to basically build a communist thought project and then enact it for real. I feel like I’m learning a lot about...well, societies, lol, and how the material factors endlessly bleed into, and shape, ideas and beliefs (and vice versa). Also, I literally have to do these because when Nemo is IN the Hollow and I want to write him getting a glass of water, I’m faced with a lot of technical questions: do fairies have running water? Does he have to get it from a stream? How do they keep things cool? Etc etc. And that’s why I go off on these, and I’m excited to keep doing them, as many as I can, with feedback from my fellow fairies. Also, do want to do ones that are NOT fairy related, so we’ll see about that. -Write John backstory. He’s gone on a few other adventures and I’d like to actually one-shot those maybe lol. -Alternate Charlie Timeline: This is something that’s bopping around in my head and I haven’t found the perfect way to make it happen, but I want Charlie to travel to an alternate version of his life and get stuck. When I figure out the right way to do this, my partners will also get to rp alternate versions of their characters lol. That’s fun right!! Of course it is, we do it all the time with AUs, but this one obvi be more personal and more closely tied to canon.

OPTIONAL: Why do you RP? First and foremost, I RP because it’s writing for the sake of writing-- joy for joy. I think this is even more important this year as I’ve had to focus on mentorship writing outside of RP. RP became the place where I didn’t have to think so hard about making everything make sense, lol. It gave my brain a break so I could be less judgmental of myself and just have fun and do the most ridiculous stuff...and some of my fave stuff iS ridiculous because of that...like Nemo and Sindri making flower crowns or the ASC nonsense. It’s this kind of light, fluffy, low-stake (but still High Stake) stuff that provided me endless joy when I needed it the most. Second of all, I RP because I really want to invest in people’s creative energy. I think doing so gives back to myself. Building canon, helping people brainstorm, seeing people grow-- I feel like a proud mom when I get to have this kind of mentorship role myself. I talked to MK about this, but even though Sam left to go off and do greater things, that’s like-- to me, it was a lot like he was graduating from this weird BDRP school I’ve helped create. I felt nothing but pride and happiness for him and really felt like, if BDRP was to explode tomorrow, I ACHIEVED the thing I set out to do when, four years ago, I sat on my computer and drafted BDRP’s mission and vision and committed myself to this admin role. And THAT’S what I want ideally-- for BDRP to be this collaborative place that doesn’t focus too much on what makes sense, on sitewide plots that force people into roles. I have always wanted plots like ASC and John’s search for Excalibur to be able to exist side by side, and I think we’ve done that. Now we just have to tend this garden, don’t we, haha? May BDRP bear many delicious fruit.

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day One Hundred Two: Game Console ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata, Uchiha Itachi ] [ SasuHina ] [ Verse: Best Years of Your Life ] [ AO3 Link ]

“Hey.”

“...hey!” Turning from her locker to look at Sasuke fully, Hinata takes a moment to adjust. It’s still taking some getting used to: him talking to her again. Only this past Summer did they finally break the years-long silence between them that bloomed from the loss of Sasuke parents, Mikoto and Fugaku. The time prior - where the pair of them had been best of friends - had then seemed like a bygone dream.

And now, it feels like she’s dreaming all over again. It’s strange, and yet...in some ways, it’s like they never stopped. But a lingering feeling makes her cautious: like if she makes one wrong move, he’ll just...leave again.

But she tries not to think about that.

“Doing anything tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow? Uh…” A moment to think. “I don’t think so?”

“You wanna come over? I just got a new game I’ve been waiting for in the mail.”

Hinata blinks. “...sure!”

She’s not much of a gamer herself - her father’s mostly against the idea of video games. Thinks they’re a superb waste of time. But he indulged her every so often as a child...mostly to keep her out of his hair. Hinata got a Gameboy for a birthday one year, and a Gamecube several after that. And recently, she saved up and got herself a Switch. Nintendo’s all she’s ever really branched into. Pokémon, Mario, Legend of Zelda...maybe childish in some eyes, but she grew up with them, and just...never really got into anything else.

Something tells her that’s not Sasuke’s style, though.

With the day over, they walk home together...which they’ve done since he started talking to her again. For the most part, they just chat and walk. But every so often, he’ll glance her way, and she suddenly feels shy all over again.

She tells herself she’s just...still adjusting to it. That’s all.

“So, um...what game did you get?”

“It’s a zombie game.”

“Z...zombies…?”

“Don’t tell me you’re scared of zombies, Hyūga.”

Her cheeks puff with a pout - partly at him calling her a scaredy cat, but mostly because he’s still calling her by her surname despite her insistence otherwise. “I’m not scared, they’re just...creepy.”

“Which means you’re scared of them.”

“No I’m not!”

“Then how do you feel about them?”

“I just...don’t like them.”

“Are you sure you still want to come over, then?”

“I won’t be playing it, so...i-it’s fine.”

“You play any games, Hyūga?”

“Yes!”

“Let me guess: cutesy ones. Or dating sims.”

“What? No! I...I play, um...retro...games.”

“Retro.”

“Yes.”

“Like…?”

“M...Mario. And Zelda. And...Pokémon…”

She fades into silence, expecting him to poke fun at her.

“Classics. Can’t go wrong with those.”

Or...he’ll like them? “...my dad doesn’t like video games. Says they’re useless. So I don’t really have a lot to play...”

“So are most hobbies. Hobbies are just ways to waste time and keep your brain busy. Show him one of those articles talking about how they help people with Alzheimer's. Maybe he’ll change his tune.”

“They do…?”

“I think so. Something like that. And, there’s people who play games for a living. Streamers, professionals on competitive teams...there’s money in it if you do it right. But, for most of us...it’s just a way to engage our brains and not be totally bored. Like a book...but better.”

That earns a small snort. “Hey, books aren’t bad!”

“No, but games are better.”

“That’s your opinion, Sasuke - not a fact.”

“And some opinions are better than others.”

Hinata just rolls her eyes as they turn onto the proper block. She doesn’t remember him being so...sassy. But then again, he’s a teenager now. The last time they really spoke was when he was seven.

How things change.

Heading into the house, Sasuke kicks off his shoes. “We’re probably here alone. Itachi’s gonna be home for the weekend but I don’t see his car yet. Shisui’s working, and so’s Manami. Staying for dinner?”

“Um...I guess -?”

“Okay, cool - we do takeout most nights cuz she works too late to really cook.”

That earns a frown. “...well, I could make so-”

“You’re a guest, you’re not gonna cook for us.”

“But I’d be happy to! I cook at home a-all the time!”

Pausing at the base of the stairs, he looks back at her. “...well, guess I can’t stop you from digging through all our stuff.”

“T-that’s not what I -!”

“I’m kidding, Hyūga. Do whatever you want.” Something shifts in his gaze. “...you’re home now...remember?”

She stills.

“...come on, let’s go boot up my game.”

Stepping into Sasuke’s room is like opening a time capsule, but...in reverse. It’s completely different from when he was a little boy. Posters litter the walls, and bookshelves are full of games, CDs, movies, and figures of...something. She doesn’t recognize any of it. A high-end PC sits on a desk, case glowing softly as it sleeps. It’s otherwise tidy, and he collapses into a beanbag chair in front of a flat screen TV, complete with a game console, once it’s all powered up.

“So...what one do you have?”

“PS4. Drives Naruto nuts cuz he’s a Microsoft fanboy.”

Hinata blinks. She...has no idea what that means. “Um…?”

“...he has an Xbox. We can’t really play together much.”

“...oh!”

“What do you got?”

“Um...a-a Switch. And...I still have my Gamecube.”

“Yeah, retro,” Sasuke replies with a grin as she goes pink. “Well, have a seat.”

Eyeing the beanbag next to him, she asks, “Which one of us is retro again…?”

“Hey, I think they’re comfy.”

Hinata eases into one, immediately feeling like it’s swallowing her up.

“I had it downloading and installing all day while I was at school, so we’re all good to go.” Sasuke boots up the game, navigating his way through the console menu, game startup, and then finally into the game itself. As expected of a zombie title, it’s dark, grim, and immediately spooky.

Hinata sinks a bit more into her seat.

The introductory level isn’t too bad...but it segues with a jumpscare that makes her eep.

“C’mon now Hyūga, we’ve only just started!”

“T-that wasn’t fair! It...it jumped out, and -”

“You wanna play?”

“N-no!”

“You sure?”

“Yes I’m sure! It - it’s too -!”

“What?”

“Scary!”

He just smirks, apparently prideful he got her to admit it. “C’mere.”

“What?”

“We’ll play together. Come sit with me.”

She’s...not exactly sure what he means. With him? These beanbags aren’t huge, she can’t exactly sit with him on it. Not unless...they…

Seeing his expectant look as the game pauses, she heaves a small sigh before managing to free herself from her own. Standing nearby, she curls a hand at her chest hesitantly. “...um -”

“Here.” Controller in one hand, he uses the other to tug her down to...sit between his knees. Arms around her and holding the device at her front, he says, “You tell me where to go.”

“B-but -?”

“You’ve clearly got better reflexes than me. You jumped a whole second before I even knew that scare happened.”

Another pout. But it’s hard to concentrate of being miffed when she really has no choice but to lean back on him to make room for his grip. Hinata’s heart pounds in her chest, all too aware of just how much of her is currently touching him.

“Where to next?”

“...u-uh...l-left?”

Off he goes, watching from over her shoulder as he stares at the screen. No matter how many times Hinata glances to him, his gaze doesn’t waver.

Unlike hers.

They continue like that for a while, Hinata giving directions and Sasuke following. Every time a zombie comes up she can’t help a sound of fright, one so bad she actually turns and buries herself into Sasuke’s shoulder.

Above her, unseen, he grins.

And, of course, it’s right then that Itachi opens the door. “Sasuke, have you heard from -?”

Both teens turn to look at him, and Hinata immediately goes bright pink.

The elder brother blinks, but otherwise doesn’t seem phased. “Have you heard from Manami or Shisui yet tonight?”

“Nope.”

“Hm...I’m going to go give them a call. Any preference on dinner orders?”

“I-I can make dinner!”

Both brothers look to Hinata, whose eyes are wide and face pink, but otherwise determined.

“Hinata, that’s not nec-”

“I know! I-I want to!”

Itachi perks a brow. “...well, all right then. Let me see if I can get ahold of them, and...we’ll plan from there.”

“...’kay!”

He takes his leave, and Sasuke looks down at her.

“...what?”

“...nothing. C’mon, we can do another level before he gets back.”

     OMG I've wanted to continue Day 63 FOREVER and I finally took the opportunity xD I dunno why this prompt jumped out at me to, but it did!      This is a follow-up of the piece where Hinata and Sasuke were childhood friends in a modern-day verse...until he lost his parents and became reclusive. They had a brief reunion at the end of 63, and...I finally continued it! With some fluffy shenanigans to counter the angst of the first part, lol      But yeah, that'll do it for tonight! I had a rather long day including treating a sick moo, so...I'm gonna call it a night. Thanks for reading!

[biscuitreviews]

Biscuit Reviews The Witcher III Wild Hunt (2-year Anniversary Review)

The Witcher III: Wild Hunt is perhaps my favorite game to come out of the PS4/Xbox One/Wii U-Switch console era. It’s won tons of awards and was game of the year for many people in 2015. I didn’t get into the Witcher series until Witcher II: Assassin of Kings was a free download for Xbox Live members in 2016. 

After I finished Witcher II, I immediately went to Witcher III and my god, talk about an amazing sequel. It was bigger, it was better, and for being the end of Geralt’s story, it did a great job for making newcomers such as myself, not feel lost at all.

I’m going to be spoiling the game so if you haven’t played Witcher III, definitely play it before going into this review.

The story of Witcher III, revolves around Geralt of Rivia, a witcher looking for his adoptive daughter Ciri alongside his on and off again lover Yennefer of Vengerburg.

Geralt will travel through large open world zones during his quest. Velen took inspiration from the Polish and Northern German countryside, Novigrad is reminiscent of the Polish city of Gdańsk during the medieval era, and finally you have the Skellige Isles, taking inspiration from Ireland. Each of these areas are massive and beautiful to look at. It’s easy to forget that you’re in a world currently being ravaged by war or filled with monsters until you stumble across areas that give you a stark reminder that there is a war happening.

One thing that I love about the game is how it handled decisions. There’s no clear good or bad decision, everything has a shade of grey. Sure there are choices that sound better in the short term, but it could have long term ramifications that could come back to haunt Geralt. One example is Triss’s quest line in Novigrad. Sure, you’re helping mages escape the city to where they no longer have to fear for themselves, but by doing so, you give the witch hunters a new target to pursue, which are non-human races such as elves and dwarves. However, if you don’t help mages escape, than later in the story Geralt’s dwarven friend, Zoltan, can help him with a jailbreak. If you do help the mages, Zoltan won’t be able to assist Geralt due to not wanting to face the wrath of the witch hunters.

Even the types of decisions you make are fantastic as well. All of these choices are actions that Geralt himself would make and do in that situation, it’s just a matter what you believe would be the overall choice he would go with. With many choice based games, dialogue options cover many aspects of a character archetype, because normally, you are making a character and are taking that character on the journey. In this case, Geralt is a character, he has his own beliefs, likes and dislikes, and dialogue choices reflect his specific personality rather than a personality a player would create.

It’s also why some aspects in gameplay are limited such as crafting. Geralt is able to craft oils and potions on his own as long as he has the formula and the ingredients. Applying the proper oil and drinking the necessary potions are necessary for fighting monsters in this game, which I’ll discuss more about later. When it comes to making armor and swords, Geralt has to seek out a Blacksmith to make these items as Geralt himself doesn’t have the kind of skill set, therefore he has to seek out a person able to build these items.

I also love how story quests and side quests interact with one another. Main story quests could go differently if you’ve done some side quests that relate to that specific quest and vice versa. Also the fact that side quests have just as much weight as the main quests make them feel more important and worth doing for that extra bit of lore or for that impact it could have on the main story.

As well polished and built the Witcher III is, it does have some minor glitches being an open world game. Sometimes you’ll find objects just randomly floating in air. Occasionally the input to talk to NPCs won’t work and you’ll have to either step back and walk forward to have the prompt reappear or just reposition Geralt himself for the NPC to talk to you. The fact that Geralt can either die or get heavily damaged from ridiculously low heights is also highly annoying and instills a fear of any small dropping points.

Another issue I would like to point out is that it’s not exactly the most socially inclusive. A lot of the main women are highly sexualized and sometimes feel that they’re nude for the sake of it. There are moments where you can choose anti-LGBT dialogue options when you encounter those characters, which I found exteremly baffeling that it was an option considering Ciri is bi and Geralt seems supportive in the dialogue they exchange. I get it, it’s a choice, you don’t have select those options, but the fact that they’re there to begin with just leaves a bit of a bad taste. Let’s not forget the entire ocean of white people in this game. I’m sorry, but including two people of color in a DLC just doesn’t cut it. Does it break the game for me? No, but I think not acknowledging that this exists within the game is even worse.

As mentioned previously, monsters have certain weakness and you are expected to exploit those weakness when fighting monsters. Using the proper tools to easily take down a monster feels great and makes you feel more invested in the world as you have to research these creatures in your bestiary to know their weaknesses. 

Going above and beyond to take on an extra tough enemy or a monster clearly above your level although feels great at first, it’s quickly brought down when the experience gained is very little and the loot isn’t something that equates the struggle you went through. It’s just a bit disappointing that you’re encouraged to research monsters and exploit weaknesses and when you do just that, the rewards just don’t reflect that.

There’s also one quirk with dialogue as well that’s honestly more funny than terrible, but the way it happened just made it more memorable to me.

This instance is going to a wake party with Yennefer in Skellige. She’ll comment on how she likes that Geralt is growing out a beard. Now if Geralt does have a beard in this instance, it makes sense, however if Geralt is clean shaven, Yennefer will still make the comment which I always found that to be a funny little programming quirk. It’s obvious that this response was to happen when Geralt has a beard and the programming within the game was supposed to read that. There are a couple of instances that NPCs will react to Geralt’s appearance and the reaction is appropriate in those moments. But the beard moment, always brings out a chuckle.

Granted for a game as massive as Witcher III to only have a few minor issues, it’s actually rather impressive. However, I will admit that it has been four years since it’s initial release and there might have been more bugs then, but now it’s a mostly smooth experience.

As mentioned in a previous post, I do refer back to this game a lot for professional research as well. CD Projekt Red used a branching writing program known as Articy Draft, a program I use in my day job. I’ll do different decisions, I’ll change the order of when I do quests and just imagine how the branching dialogue looked within Articy and the type of variables used to determine how certain events play out.

One also can’t talk about Witcher III without mentioning Gwent, what is perhaps one of the best mini-games within a game since Final Fantasy VIII’s Triple Triad. Gwent is an easy to learn, but tough to master card game at the start. It’s tough at first as Geralt doesn’t have many cards at his disposal, but once you finally get a win, the dam starts to break little by little. Geralt will begin winning more powerful cards that can be added to his deck. Eventually it does get to a point where everyone becomes a bit easy to defeat as you gain more powerful cards and build your deck for effective strategies. Regardless it’s a game within a game that you can easily get lost in. 

Witcher III also set what many gamers regard as the “Golden Standard” for how DLC should be treated. Witcher III includes 16 free DLC additions ranging from additional quests, items, additional costumes, and Gwent cards. Then there’s the two paid DLC expansions, Heart of Stone and Blood and Wine, which involves two new stories.

Both of these expansions also add additional gameplay mechanics to make Geralt stronger, which you will need to take advantage of for Blood and Wine as monsters and enemies in that particular expansion are a bit tougher than in the main game and Heart of Stone.

Blood and Wine also contains my favorite quest in the entire game. The quest is called “Paperchase” and it’s hilarious. Something about a legendary monster slayer still having to adhere to the bureaucracy of a bank to get a reward for saving a guy years ago is just amazing. It shows that not all great quests have to involve you having an encounter that puts you on the edge of your seat.

The Witcher III is a game that deserves the praise and reception it has received. It has made a mark on the RPG genre that many developers are taking note and implementing in their games. The most famous case being Ubisoft with the Assassin’s Creed series by following a similar dialogue decision based structure and having side quests impact the main story and vice versa. This is a game that has earned its status as a modern classic, which I’m sure will keep that status for a very long time.

As I’m sure it’s no surprise to anyone on Tumblr or any denizen of the internet, The Witcher III: Wild Hunt receives a 5 out 5

So far it’s been quite an interesting two years on this site. Frankly, I expected to just be a reviewer that would continuously scream into the void. To my surprise, I’ve had quite a few of you that like and share my posts adding more to the conversation whether you agree or disagree. I’ve also recently passed the 50 reviews milestone as well so the 50 and the two year mark happened rather quickly!

Here’s to the march on getting to 100 reviews...at some point!

[nikatyler]

Another week is ending, another replies post is here. Why is it that when there’s a million deadlines waiting for me, time just gets faster? I miss the old days when I had nothing to do. Kinda.

Remember when I rambled a lot in these posts before getting to the actual replies? I have nothing to say this time, other than Roses are coming back (which you’ve probably already noticed). I’m kinda sad to see gen 2 of NSB is truly coming to an end now (in my game, it’s been over for a few months). It was definitely an era and I want to thank everyone who’s been here for this crazy ride. It seems to me like you all enjoyed it way more than I expected. I hope you’ll stay and well, we’ll see them again in a few months. This time, Sunset will be in the spotlight.

I’m talking as if there weren’t a few more days of NSB left in the queue. It’s the FiNaL cOuNtDoWn...idk why I just thought of that song but I’m gonna go listen to it now. If I’m not mistaken, Friday is the last NSB day. Enjoy it.

mysticsheepplant replied to your photoset “Rose, Sammy protect this innocent bean has the voice of an actual...”

I'm exited, I love her

Thanks! ♥ Me too. I didn’t expect to love her so much but then she stole my heart

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “Rocket, do you even remember our first meeting? I was beyond pissed...”

:(

Doggos should live forever!

Agreed

@ whoever runs this planet pls make dogs immortal thank you

dandylion240 replied to your photoset “Ross: “And like…once I become a vampire, the wrinkles will be gone,...”

Aw Ross can almost be sweet

He’s trying

jackssims replied to your photoset “Hey Lilith…why are you here?”

lajsglkdas Is Lilith going to deliver her brother's baby? Iconic

ikr? She showed up there and I was like “Oh no. Oh nooo. Oh yes. This couldn’t have gotten any better.”

jackssims replied to your photoset “Lilith: “Before we start -” Caleb: “Can we do it now? We can talk...”

sljagfdlks I was like "Lilith's really breaking the 4th wall here" before I even got to the tags and honestly? I'm here for it

This couldn’t have happened without me mentioning this let’s be real

Also, if I’m not mistaken, it will soon be the second anniversary of the original Caleb abduction. The abduction that changed pretty much everything for this blog.

simsandthensome replied to your photoset “I’m blue da ba dee da ba daa Da ba dee da ba daa, da ba dee da ba daa,...”

you say that like I don't willingly have this song on my phone in 2019

To be fair now that you say it, I’m surprised I don’t have it on my phone

It’s kind of an annoying song but in the best way

jackssims replied to your photoset “100 baby challenge but it’s with Caleb Vatore and you have to get him...”

Chsbdjdsjjf an iconic concept

madgnomes replied to your photoset “100 baby challenge but it’s with Caleb Vatore and you have to get him...”

I like this idea haha

mysticsheepplant replied to your photoset “100 baby challenge but it’s with Caleb Vatore and you have to get him...”

TBH I wanna do that with Don Lothario

Imagine if I actually did that. Should I? Also, I love the idea of doing that to Don Lothario instead. Don deserves it because he’s kinda the worst.

cafeheart replied to your photoset “Rose, Lydia wants to fight everyone basically an angry chihuahua ...”

looks like a cinnamon roll but will e a t y o u

As in...oh god I didn’t think of that and I hate it but also you’re not wrong. Good point lmao

Me: I’m an innocent child!!!1!1!11!

Also me: immediately thinks of this

tealiah replied to your photoset “Mid-Century Twin Houses I’ve been inspired by people putting multiple...”

This is SO cool!!

Thank you! I tried.

lilleputtu replied to your photoset “To quote one of my favourite P!ATD songs: you looked at death in a...”

Rocket Breeze - Vampire Dog, coming to a NSB near you very soon

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “To quote one of my favourite P!ATD songs: you looked at death in a...”

Yay, long live the pup!

I wish we could have actual vampire dogs. Kinda weird but kinda cool

elisabettasims replied to your photoset “Ross: “Shhh, Lucian. Shhh…come on. Seriously, would you shut up? Your...”

Nice to see some things about Ross haven't changed. He's terrible with kids.

He might be a better person now but deep down in the core, it’s still our good old buddy Ross :D

elisabettasims replied to your photoset “I used to love this kind of cake…why do I hate it now? Caleb can eat...”

This sounds like a clear case of 'be careful what you wish for'.

Yup. But I guess giving up the cake is worth it

whysimstho replied to your photoset “Sunset: “Give me that ball, Rocket! We’ll buy you an age-down treat if...”

Me everytime there's a rocket post: not to be dramatic but I'd die for you my darling boy

Same

melideesim replied to your post “One of the best Not So Berry Simblrs! ��”

I agree with this. I binge-read the entire legacy from start to now yesterday!

GUYS YOU’RE TOO NICE TO ME

Thank you so much! I don’t feel like I’m doing anything special but really, thanks a lot :’)

fataleromeo replied to your photoset “Speaking of cakes, Ross is willing to give it a try again.”

I mean...cake! ����

I’ve only now noticed how obsessed my sims are with it

fataleromeo replied to your photoset “If this ain’t the cutest dark form I’ve ever seen”

❤❤❤

aestheicpixels replied to your photoset “If this ain’t the cutest dark form I’ve ever seen”

Awwww

simlovinggirl replied to your photoset “If this ain’t the cutest dark form I’ve ever seen”

Awwwww he's the cutest vampire oml ♥ ♥

It wasn’t really my intention to make him look cute, but then he did this and I knew he was trying to be scary but actually...it was just adorable.

jackssims replied to your photoset “Ross: “Told you this would be the best thing to do. I’ve always told...”

I'm soft for these two tf

We all are

whysimstho replied to your photoset “Ross: “Told you this would be the best thing to do. I’ve always told...”

Can I just say I LOVE that he still has his lighter hair color

I wanted to keep it to show that he’s different now, or something like that. I can’t think of the right word at the moment. Classic Ronnie

aestheicpixels replied to your photo “you’ll be mine”

He's such a cutie!!

This is where he was supposed to look all evil and scary but he’s already failing lmao

jackssims replied to your photo “you’ll be mine”

I thought of this the other day! Foreshadowing in plain sight, I love it

I was wondering if anyone would see it coming or if it would be more like “oh yeah, Halloween, vampires, of course she did that, no big deal, let’s move on”.

fataleromeo replied to your photo “you’ll be mine”

Oh wow, I love this! I don't think I was following you back when it was originally posted. Glad I am now!

♥♥

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “He’s so cute and I’m dead. Also, I have a headcanon that babies who...”

Aaaawww he's really precious!

In each Form

This was the moment I was suddenly happy Caleb got abducted again

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your post “This is gay sim twilight I'm living for it”

If twilight was gay I would be into it. Probably. I'm kinda proud that I never had "twilight phase"

I’ve only ever watched the first movie. I don’t remember it too much though. But I remember having like two Twilight posters from teen magazines on my wardrobe when I was about 11 because I wanted to be cool, even though I didn’t really know what it was. I just knew everyone was talking about it.

I also had this idea that “cool kids have posters everywhere” so...yeah. I was a weird kid at that time.

simlovinggirl replied to your photoset “Stella: that’s my otp”

Mine too Stella, mine too ♥

They’re everyone’s otp here, aren’t they? :D 

I’ll never forget when I asked who you guys ship Ross with and everyone who replied just said Caleb. There were a few other guesses, but everyone mentioned they were rooting for Caleb. The audience’s love for these two is one of my favourite things about this generation.

is it weird that i just called you guys audience

[leta-the-strange]

Spoiler-free COG feelings/essay/thoughts before I see the movie. Spoiler-free because the movie isn’t out here til the end of the week but obviously, I’ve picked up info from trailers and interviews and things like that so sort of common knowledge stuff but I guess if you’ve avoided all the promos for the year I wouldn’t want to ruin it for you now so don’t read until after you’ve seen it if that’s the case (again, I only know basic info).

I have a lot of feelings that I’ve been sitting on for a while because frankly, large parts of the Fantastic Beasts and Harry Potter fandom terrify me. It’s why in my nineteen years (okay, thirteen years – I had to learn how to read) I’ve distanced myself from engaging in the fandom too much and when I do, I try and stick to as safe, neutral content as possible.

But I’m going to write a little bit a lot (my anxiety’s poppin off the charts right now) not to antagonise anyone or personally offend people just to get this pent up crap off my chest before I see the movie. 

I have Māori and Pākehā parentage. Although I am proud to be a Māori girl and I’m definitely not white-passing, I do acknowledge that out of my family, I was born with the lightest skin and being a lighter-skinned/mixed poc among my family and friends has made me recognise my privilege. That isn’t to say I haven’t experienced lifelong struggles with racism, bullying and discrimination but I will never experience the same micro-aggressions and experiences that they have. Although, I do have light-skinned privileges and I don’t ever want to take away the struggles of my family that I won’t experience on the same level, growing up looking a little different opened me up a lot of feelings of invalidation within my own culture. When I experienced racism as a child, I was also met with disdain for being upset about it when I wanted to talk about it. This was when I was a child and I didn’t understand lighter skinned privilege or the animosity from some of my own people. I am far more educated now, but during that confusing time I, like most children, turned to literature (which in turn is what helped me make sense of the world).

I’ve gotten a little off track – this isn’t overly important to what I’m writing about, but it is introducing my opinion as coming from a woman of colour who has experienced racism and horrible bullying, but I always feel the need to clarify my position as a lighter skinned poc before giving my opinion based on those experiences.

Obviously from my content, I love Leta Lestrange. Perhaps it started out as a matter of representation, but I feel like over the past year, I have become intrigued with her for a number of reasons. She’s striking me as a Sirius, Regulus and Andromeda Black type character. Different to her family and caught in a struggle of light and dark (magic, not skin colour). Loves magical creatures. I haven’t seen it yet but it seems like she is one of the centre point characters of the film. She seems to be connected to many of the main characters in one way or another and has always striked me as the most intriguing.

I really do hope I am wrong but the ‘other’ love interest’s in the Harry Potter universe are usually treated terribly. They experience character assassination to further the development of the canon/new interest.

I really hope this film doesn’t do the whole blow out a woc character to make the white, self-insert, classically beautiful, ‘im not like other girls’ character shine brighter.

Before everyone comes for me, I wouldn’t say I’m a Tina ‘anti’ whatever that is. There’s no like extreme hatred at all! I would say I don’t like Tina as a character, or Queenie for that matter. Not yet anyway. The new trailer gives me hope that this movie might win me over finally. It doesn’t need to be upsetting or offensive to anyone. There are lots of people out there with favourite and not-so-favourite characters. A lot of people dislike Ron, Dumbledore, Snape, even Harry…and there are people who have those characters as their favourite.  

There are a lot of reasons I don’t like Tina and Queenie. I may address them in a different post if being vague upsets people more than going in-depth but at this point, I am trying to stay as unconfrontational as possible but I have seen people get extremely furious when they don’t deem your reason for disliking them to be ‘good enough’ so if not saying exactly what I find uncomfortable about them is not as preferable as telling people then I can write it up as respectfully as possible if I’m treated the same way. All I’ll say is that I think Tina is a good person, but, in my opinion, not a great character. Queenie is the opposite. I would not like Queenie as a person but I have to admit, she’s a good character. But I’ll hold the rest of my opinions until after the second film. 

Honestly, the film adaptions leave some of my favourite book characters to be desired. Maybe if FB was a novel, I’d like Tina but I really dislike her in the movies. I have seen people blow up when this is said. I try to understand the outrage. I think one of the reasons I dislike Tina is one of the reasons why people love her. She is, at this point and in my opinion (which is ONLY an opinion), a self-insert character. Any Newt x Reader fanfiction can easily read as a Newtina fanfiction and vice versa. I know. Because I’m a FB fanfiction writer myself and tried to write her. Sometimes when you attach yourself to a character so much, it can feel personally offensive when someone says something as harmless such as they don’t like then. I don’t experience this as often. Every Reader/OC fanfiction is, perhaps unintentionally, but nearly always aimed at a white person in description. In actuality, nearly every character in literature is, intentionally or not, described with textbook white features or assumed white by the fandom/readers/watchers.

I know people are going to hate this opinion because I’ve seen people jump down other people’s throats when this gets brought up. I do believe, whether it is conscious or not, Leta not being white COULD, subconsciously, be a factor as to why she is so inherently hated. I’ve seen more hate for Leta than any other character – even the antagonist! I hate what they did to Lavender Brown, book and movie wise, but even she, being as over exaggeratedly unlikable as a romantic plot device, received and still receives far less fandom hate than Cho Chang (who was also eventually written to be ‘jealous, hysterical, unlikeable’, etc, etc – I don’t agree btw I love, understand and appreciate Cho and Lavender)  who was smart, talented, kind, traumatised, and until it was no longer convenient to the main characters romance for her to be ‘likeable’ anymore.

I wish I could enjoy going through the Leta tag but often, her and Newt can’t even be in a scene or photo together and people lose their minds with anger and hate. Literally, the comments on any scene/photo they are in are all along the lines of ‘stay away from newt!/poor tina/urgh, don’t flirt leta/leta WHAT ARE YOU DOING?’. Sorry, to break it to you guys but it isn’t a love triangle. It’s a love conga line. The only person getting in the way of ‘Newtina’ is Newt. Instagram is even worse. By worse, I mean horrible beyond belief. The better comments are the ones are the ones merely (though still grossly) comparing her to Tina and how much they dislike her, the other ones are wishes that she’ll get killed or join Grindelwald. It’s literally not even hidden the fact they wish either of these things happen so Newtina can happen faster. I’m not a Newtina shipper at all (Yet. Again, this might change if the films improve) but this would be one of the worst ways to further your ship. That is literally not going to change the fact that Newt’s still in love with her (you can have feelings for two people at the same time. The filmmakers confirmed - in fact, one of the first things about the new movie that they confirmed - that Newt is ‘absolutely still in love with her’), it just makes her conveniently unattainable. I do have a feeling that Leta might die and if it happens, it better not be because she’s unwillingly in the way of a ‘love triangle’ that people have forced these three characters into. If Newtina is going to happen in a way that isn’t awful, rushed and horrible, it will be slow-burn and it’s in own time AFTER Newt has healed and properly fixed things with Leta. You can’t be best friends and in love with someone for 15+ years and fall out of love with them immediately after they die, turn bad and settle for a woman you met for like two days and collectively spent maybe ten hours with. It might be a Ron/Hermione situation where it’s slow and eventual. That’s the only way I could possibly get on board and I think it could be done tastefully if they don’t resort to lazy writing. I do have my fingers crossed I’ll start to like the Goldsteins before this happens and I can enjoy it as much as everyone else does.

To be honest, after seeing the trailers, I see only two endings for Leta (and I hate them BOTH):

She joins Grindelwald: If this is the plot twist, it’s the shittiest plot twist ever. Pretty much 90% of the fans since seeing the first film have assumed/liked to believe she’s pure evil. Probably the characters themselves all assume she’s evil from her last name. I was worried the whole ‘haha, I was on Grindelwald’s side all along!’ situation was going to happen. We know JK hates Slytherins. My ‘Leta joins Grindelwald’ theory would be that she has always been on the good side – or trying to be – and after YEARS of oppression and discrimination and being distrusted by maybe the central characters in this film no matter how hard she tries AND maybe finally realising that Newt isn’t going to ever forgive her she just snaps and goes all ‘f*ck you guys then’ (I wouldn’t blame her tbh). HOWEVER, I doubt this. In a trailer, you literally see Leta THROW a fucking spell STANDING BY HERSELF (what u doin bby?) at Grindelwald. Trust me, if this was Tina it would have been all everyone was talking about but of course the fandom was all ‘yeah, see, she’s in the same frame as Grindelwald SHE’S EVIL’. One of the trailers is literally titled Leta vs. Grindelwald. Everything in the trailers/promos points to Queenie joining Grindelwald but *shrugs, I guess*.

Leta dies: I get this may seem the preferable way to appease the Leta haters and the Leta lovers especially if she dies after redeeming herself or heroically or whatever but urgh, no. I know everyone’s like ‘DoNt MAKe ThIS AbOUT RaCe’ when the woc character inevitably is killed but I’m sorry. To have been able to sit in a theatre as a little girl and see Leta Lestrange in the wizarding world would have blown my tiny mind. Honestly, as an older teen seeing Zoe Kravitz in that little photo frame in Newt’s case in the first film was iconic enough for me. After growing up being made to believe I was ‘unattractive’ because of how I looked, seeing total dreamboats like Callum Turner and Eddie Redmayne’s characters being all heart-eyes over Leta is, like...wow!  And I do have an uncomfortable truth for people who want Leta to die. That would possibly be the WORST thing to happen for the Newtina thing (would pretty much be the last nail in the coffin for me ever coming around to it). I’ve seen it happen in my family when someone you love dies. Your feelings for them essentially FREEZE. You can’t fall out of love with someone who is dead. That’s of course not to say that you don’t love again and just as much as the first time. But it takes time (LOTS of it) and there’s a little part of your heart that’s like…permanently sealed off. I don’t even like Newtina yet and I’m hoping for the sake of the Newtina fans that Leta doesn’t die because freakin’ yikes. Just let them heal and connect and be besties again goddammit, its POSSIBLE (and bet your ass I’ll write it my god damn self to prove it if they don’t). 

I know these are highly unpopular opinions and I HOPE that I am wrong, and they do her character justice and don’t discard her via death or the dark side.

In summary, I suppose my biggest struggle with Leta’s character is definitely the overwhelming fandom hate which I still can’t quite comprehend. I really want to believe it isn’t a race thing. Though, I have seen horrible posts about Leta, mean comments on nearly every Leta promo, Zoe Kravitz literally being called a c*nt in the comments of a Leta post on tumblr, a lot of fanfictions having her be primarily evil, selfish, manipulative, in some a rapist even, ugly, cruel, etc. But honestly, she’s literally not interfering in Newt having a relationship with anyone at all??? She’s literally been villainised because her friend can’t get over her (getting Snily nostalgia). But buggered if I’ve been able to find next to anything of that calibre about Jacob’s fiancée (literally a Queenie doppelganger) who left him, like, the day he met Queenie. I get that it was a deleted scene for those non-hardcore fans, but Leta-hate was literally kicked off by a picture in a photo frame and a comment made by a, in my opinion, kind of not-nearly-as-infallible-as-people-think character that barely knows Newt breaking into his head non-consensually (after being repeatedly told not to) who had an agenda to hook him up with her sister. Sooo…*shrugs*.

Even I personally have tried to keep out of the fandom debates, but I wrote a Leta and Newt story (still ongoing) that I stopped for a while because the kind of disgusting comments I was receiving about people hating the pairing. Which, I get. You don’t like a pairing, that’s cool? Why are you going and seeking out a piece about them and then taking the time to leave a comment? Whenever I start to read a story about Leta being this horrific monster of a person and being torn apart and compared and occasionally borderline racist, I just…click out? I know it’s only a small patch of weeds in what is likely a garden of roses, but I have never come across such an insecure fandom for a literal canon ship. If the relationship was that pure and strong, you wouldn’t feel the need to kill or villainise the (non-existent) ‘threat’. I just hope the writers feel the same way. You can write healthy closures and strong women of colour characters without casting them aside for plot development/man pain/stereotypical Caucasian romance/plot device, etc... I’m going to go into the theatre at the end of the week slightly optimistic to be fair but I’m also fully expecting to be disappointed but honestly, Leta could avada kedavra every character and she’s still going to be my favourite, I don’t make the rules.