#cilil

[mithrilhearts]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

Look at me getting to this 500 years later (I'm so sorry!!) Anyway.

Thank you both so much, @cilil & @laurfilijames for sending me this ask game thingy!! I figured I'd just do it in one post, so I hope that's okay, but here we go!

I think picking my "favorite fics" of mine is like, asking a parent to pick their favorite child - not easy, in most cases I guess lol...but I will do my best and explain why! These are all based off of fics I've COMPLETED, and by no means reflects on my love and affection for the other stories I've written. I love them all for their own reasons, otherwise I wouldn't have written them.

In no particular order...

May Your Forge Burn Bright - This is THE original longfic from me. I started this back when I was creeping my way out of RP and into fanfiction, and was nothing more than an independent baby writer. (Been writing a long time, just never like this), and the story means so much to me, as well as the commentary from readers along the way. It's still my longest fic to date, and I love a good "alternate first meeting" fic. It's the OG, and you can't replace that.

Dragonhearted - The Hobbit & Beauty and The Beast are my two FAVORITE stories, and mashing them together like this was perfect for me. Dragon!Thorin is such a fun concept for me, and badass Bilbo is another. This setting just WORKS. (Also, did you know @i-did-not-mean-to had a BLANKET made for this fic???)

Kurdu 'abadaz - That's right, I finished this one just recently, and it has easily stolen my heart to being a favorite. The Fix-it fic that I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to write, that went under a LOT of rehashing and had a huge overhaul in the story early on when planning. It turned out so much better than anticipated, and the love for this fic from readers/friends has been overwhelming.

Fuck Thy Neighbor - A VERY FUN ROM-COM STYLE MODERN AU!!! This really had me cackling the entire way through, and like a few other fics of mine, it spawned from a writer's ask game/tag game thing that I can't quite remember. Accidental marriage & neighbors? I love it. It's so funny, and I enjoy rereading it frequently for the laughs.

When Darkness Shines Brightest - Did you know that anything can be made into a Bagginshield Fic? Did you know that this fic spawned from a joke/conversation between @starthecozy and I and then erupted into this really original Hades/Persephone, Nightmare Before Xmas, blended style fic?? Various worlds and environments, powers over elements, and saving homes from a dragon?? The Onion Fic sprouted, and blossomed into one of my favorite stories, and I got to collaborate with Star the entire way through it, and we had SO MUCH FUN!!! Go give it a read, it's really neat!!

Honorable Mentions:

(Take Me Back To) The Night We Met - My entry for THAUC22 (partnered with the amazing @consultingpacha), and one of my FAVORITE concepts. Yet again, another "alternate meeting" style fic, featuring small kids Fili and Kili, rather than adults. What it sets up to at the end of the fic blends into the OG Hobbit story, but with a few small changes that I kind of want to explore one day in a sequel. 👀

Between Vices and Virtues - My entry for TRSB22 (partnered with @mysandwichranaway!!) First of all, I love working with Sandy, it's truly one of my favorite things on this good planet, and I can't wait to do it again - hopefully soon. Secondly, this was my take at a modern royalty AU, and learning about how to connect with the people around you. I have two sequels planned for this universe (even if this fic kind of felt like a let-down in terms of reception? but idc about that lmao) it was so fun for me. A light dusting of magic superstition in a modern au setting? Sign me up!

[emyn-arnens]

Self-rec time! What are your favorite five fics that you've written and why? After replying to this ask, feel free pass on to five other writers to spread the love. 💗

This is for @cilil who sent me one of these too—thank you both! <3

and I will love with urgency, but not with haste (T, Aegnor/Andreth, 3.1k) was one of the first fics I wrote for the Silm fandom (and felt a bit like jumping into the deep end since it's for Obscure Silm at that), so I have a lot of nostalgia attached to it and am still very fond of it.

Beneath the Innumerable Stars (G, Findis & Ilmarë, 1k) is a short one, but as someone who has trouble visualizing things, I'm awfully proud of the imagery I came up with for this. I tend to stick to places and characters that have at least a little bit of canon description to go on, so I'm proud of myself for branching out here.

Crowned with Lilies Fair (G, Belladonna & Goldberry, 0.7k) is another short one. Look, I love hobbits. And I especially love hobbits interacting with ancient beings. And Belladonna and Goldberry never get enough love.

On These Hither Shores (G, Frodo & Boromir, 3.2k) is one my favorite fics I've ever written, and one of the ones I'm proudest of. I'd wanted for a long time to write a fic focusing on Frodo and Boromir's relationship before the Ring got a hold of Boromir, and I'm quite happy with how this turned out.

through thick and thin (G, Frodo & Merry, 1k) has a special place in my heart because Frodo and Merry are one of my most cherished LOTR brotps. I can never find enough Frodo & Merry fics to sate my need, so I had to write the fic I wanted to see in the world.

[mirkwood]

Bestie I need to know more about "angbang smut but it's about feanormelkor" and "manwe/varda/melkor"👀

Hi bestie, thank you for the ask <3

--- So let's talk about the first one. It is hugely inspired by a witch king/khamul fic I read a few months ago. The witch king was thinking about Mairon while fucking khamul and i just..... GOD. Here's a link because it's too good.

Now. when it comes to angbang/feanormelkor. This will probably piss off some of yall shippers but. i honestly don't really care <3 Basically, I see Melkor as someone who would be so fucking obsessed with feanor that he would Never Be Able To Forget Him. Mairon here is used as a rebound. I know, how dare Melkor do this to him. He doesn't care. He wants what he can NEVER have.

Melkor fantasizing about feanor while having Mairon in his bed is just soooo djkshkshfkfsf yeah. Now I don't know how that will go (if Mairon realizes / if Melkor moans another name "accidentally") but I am actually so excited to write this.

I think that's all I can really say. It's just very self indulgent and a very melkor thing to do <3

--- The second one. Tbh I feel kinda exposed saying all of this to The Manwe Stan without having done my research yet but also that's why I haven't started writing this yet. it's all tangled in my brain rn skfjskfsk

So, I honestly don't know if someone has thought about this before (probably yes) but. I've been thinking about the connection Manwe and Melkor share. Like I do not know if there's a specific word for it (I do not mean ósanwe here) but let me put this here plainly. Manwe and Varda are sharing a very intimate moment (romantic at first, then turns to sexual) and Melkor can feel whatever Manwe is feeling.... Like he Knows why and whose feelings and sensations he's feeling and he can't do anything about it. He just have to wait for them to stop (doubtful).

The purpose of this fic is to make Melkor suffer <3 that's it. I just want him to realize he will never Actually Feel Varda (wink) and he will never get whatever Manwe has.

[i-did-not-mean-to]

Kinktober 2023

Ladies and Gents, here is the Masterlist for the Kinktober Challenge, brought to you by @cilil

Body worship & virginity - Caranthir x Finrod

Roleplay/role reversal/CNC & bondage - Thorin x OC/reader

Intercrural sex & wings - Day 1 - Gothmog x Eönwë

Bath/shower & incubi/succubi - Manwë x Ulmo

Cam & temperature play - Daeron x Maglor

Knotting & frottage - Finrod x Wolf-Sauron (dark)

Dirty talk & lingerie - Angbang

Voyeurism & dub-con/non-con - Gríma

(Pseudo) Incest & torture Fëanor x Fingolfin

Orgy & Predator/prey - Day 4 - Celegorm x Oromë x Aredhel

Size difference & friends/enemies with benefits - Glorestor

Breath play & humiliation/degradation - Maglor x Glorfindel for @maglor-my-beloved

Masturbation & massages - Ori x OC

Authority kink & oral - Russingon (for anon)

Somnophilia & impact play - Day 7 - Nerdanel x Anairë

Fingering & aphrodisiacs - Bagginshield

Blood play & wet dreams/dream sex - Nightmare!Irmo x Curufin

ABO & praise kink - Day 3 - Melkor/Maedhros for anon

Telepathy & sex worker/stripper - Gondolin ot3 (for @jaz-the-bard)

Crossdressing & pegging - Day 2 - Námo x Vairë (for @cilil)

Clothed sex & blindfolds- Finwë/Thingol

Electrostimulation & pet play - Finrod/Celegorm/Curufin for MoonLord

Knife/Sword/Gun play & cock warming - Fíli x OC/reader

Hand kink/gloves & toys - Celebrimbor x Narvi for anon

Daddy/Mommy & edging/OD - Théoden x OC/reader

Hate fucking & Emotional/therapy sex - Day 5 - Manwë x Melkor

Glory Hole & breeding kink/creampie - Maeglin x Gondolin (lol) for anon

Boots/feet & intoxication - Beleg x Mablung

Public & Biting/Marking - Day 6 - Curumo x Aiwendil

Tentacles & nipple play - Silvergifting

Extra: Monsterfucking, claustrophilia, mirror play, hypnosis/mind control, dumbification, oviposition, dacryphilia, voice kink, mistaken identity

ʙᴏɴᴜꜱ: Voyeurism, Virginity, and Sex Pollen - Gothmog x Eönwë, Thuri x Ilmarë, Russingon

I will try to write short ficlets for all of these ("try" being the keyword).

Please give it up for @cilil who has compiled this lovely list -> ✨post!✨

The original graphic is under the "read more" <3

And, as if this was not suicidal enough, I'll integrate the 7 days of @silmsmutweek into the roster (in green).

[niennawept]

Something I've always been curious about: How did you end up choosing the name Nienna? What drew you to her in particular?

Oh! Thank you for asking!

I've always been really fond of pantheons, real or fictional. I think people's gods tell you a lot about their culture and their world. It's one of those things I could talk about for an hour unprompted. So I was already primed to be interested in the Valar.

But to answer your question for Nienna specifically - it's what her presence says about the world. Yes, there is tragedy. There is grief and death and loss. But the Children are never alone in their grief because Nienna has compassion for the whole world

She has the kind of energy that I want to bring to life. Empathy for people's hurts, attempts to understand them and give them the benefit of the doubt.

(There is also a silly reference to the mild oath "Jesus Wept" in my name because I contain multitudes.)

Thank you for asking ❤️

To answer in a more personal way, and cw: grief

The only thing I wanted when my father passed away was not to feel like I was the only one morning him. He was a pretty difficult person at times - he didn't have many people at the end - and I felt so alone in missing him. When I read about Nienna - I wished she was real so I wouldn't have to be all by myself.

Anyway, Nienna is my favorite Vala; thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[lvsifer]

Ok I'm sorry, I know I'm being annoying with my digging up old stuff all the time but I couldn't resist -

This would not have happened under Pope Melkor.

annoying? ANNOYING? I am DELIGHTED.

And hell yeah that would’ve definitely happened.

[ruiniel]

Omg I'm obsessed with your masked Mairon art. I'm curious now, is there any headcanon behind it? Care to share? ^^

AGH thanks much, the idea came from my obsession with the symbolism behind masks firstly and then: let's say this was after Tol-In-Gaurhoth where Huan bit deeply into his face. Even though he was able to regain a fair form, no matter his powers, Huan's maw left a deep scar he couldn't hide or use glamor on.

So, being who he is, he crafted something: a gilded black onyx mask for himself. Not to hide the scar because of its appearance or anything (I think he'd look amazing with it and scars are beautiful) but because it reminded him and everyone else of that particular defeat. Mairon being the vain sort, he wouldn't have that (also he grew to love the look ahem).

Morgoth or Thuringwethil get to see him without it, though.

[saintstars]

I stole a quote from one of your responses to my comments on AO3 and made it aesthetic, enjoy (it was too iconic, I had to)

(I think it was on the Angbang fic with the Maigina)

This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen

[quinthejester]

Hey hey :) I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for all the lovely art you made for SG and Eönwë Week. I know it may be a bit weird of a random person like me who organized neither of these to say that, but I really enjoyed your posts and... yeah. It's a lot of work, I know, so thank you for that and for making me smile during a tough month😁❤️

This is genuinely such a sweet and kind message, thank you ❤️ I’m glad you enjoyed my work so much, it’s all been incredibly fun and rewarding to create. I just love these characters so much, and it’s been great to make art for them again

I hope you’re looking after yourself, and that things get easier, and I’m glad that my art helped make you smile during a tough time.

Thank you so much for such a kind message, this was really touching to read ❤️❤️

[helenvader]

Get booped, Helen!

Gonna take this as an opportunity to say I hope you're doing well. You're always a joy to see on my dash ☺️❤️

Aaaaw, thank you! ♥️ It's always joy to see you on my dash, too. 😊

I'm doing quite fine. I am pleasantly surprised that I have started writing fanfic again, and while my Muse woke up thanks to ROP, it's basically Silmarillion fanfic. Who could it be about, I wonder? Yes. 😃 Mairon the Moron rules my heart.

What about you?

[mithrilhearts]

For the ask game! What is your favourite character to write about and why?☺️

I feel like this is a trap question, because I could probably go on and on about my favorite character(s).

I'll keep it short though: Thorin Oakenshield is my biggest blorbo, and I love exploring more and more of him as a character. Honestly, I first got into Tolkien writing through roleplay, and I wrote the role of Thorin, which really got me into his headspace and helped me develop history and headcanons for him that made me love him more. From favorite foods, to how he interacts with his family back prior to the quest, there's SO MUCH to explore with him. His character to me is very deep, and I love that.

My idea of him may not align with the vast majority of other Thorin fanatics, and that's okay! I love seeing the interpretations of other writers so much, and it only helps me learn him more!

I love the broody, somewhat tortured, hero...which shows in every other blorbo I latch myself onto.

Honorable mention to Bilbo, because I feel like I can relate to him on a personal level more, with his personality and what not, which makes him pretty fun to write!

fanfic writer inbox game!

[crackinthecup]

BEAUTIFUL PERSON AWARD! Once you are given this award you're supposed to paste it in the asks of 8 people who deserve it. if you break the chain nothing happens, but it's sweet to know someone thinks you're beautiful inside and out!!!!

Right back at youuuuu 💖💖💖

[mirkwood]

I love your feanormelkor posts. Never stop🖤

Ohhhh it'd be impossible to stop 😭😭🖤

[serene-faerie]

BEAUTIFUL PERSON AWARD! Once you are given this award you're supposed to paste it in the asks of 8 people who deserve it. if you break the chain nothing happens, but it's sweet to know someone thinks you're beautiful inside and out!!!!

Awwww, thank you so much ❤️ this means so much to me!

Thanks for sending this to me 💕💕💕

[arianwen44]

I've been absolutely loving your Silm art! Also always nice to see a fellow d&d enthusiast in the wild😁💕

Thank you!! There's definitely more to come :3 and I'm so happy to meet another d&d enthusiast!! 💕 (druid, cleric, and paladin main for me!)

[ruiniel]

🌸💕 for being kind and lovely, have a kiss on the forehead (or a digihug? whatever works)! pass it on to 10 people 💕🌸(if you feel like it)

Right back at youuu!

BOOP