#christian yu scene

[dprjjang]

SAINT BTS 💙

[potatomountain]

Two Just For You

Pairing: Song Mingi x afab reader x Christian Yu (DPR Ian)

WC: 5975

AU: non-idol

Genre: fuck buddies to partners. friends to partners.

Warning(s): "cheating", everyone swings all ways. threesome, Dvp. mxm, pet names, some degradation, sub Mingi, switch Christian, switch reader. sex with no barrier (reader is on the pill), Mingi is kind of a jealous toxic dick. big dick Mingi

Summary: Mingi hasn't tried to make things official with you, even after weeks of sleeping together and spending time together. He uses your new friendship with the hottie from the bar, Christian, as the excuse why he hasn't, going so far as fighting with you about it often, until you had enough. You didn't expect Christian to jump to the plate, even offering a relationship you wouldn't dare to think about before. But will it actually work?

Nets: @pirateeznet | @mirohs-aurora-society

Special tags: This is a belated birthday present for @mingsolo !! This is part two of Just For Tonight which was also written for Isa <3

dividers by: @cafekitsune

Taglist (Form): @candypop1611 | @vannabanana1995  | @piratequeen-queenofgames | @starstruckforyou

“So another fight?” Christian asked with a crooked brow, bringing his cup to his lips as you spilled the tea on your latest fight with Mingi- in which you weren't sure you were dating or just fuck buddies, at least not any more.

You had given him that one chance, and then he occupied your bed any chance you two got. But outside of sex, it was hard to determine your chemistry. Was it just sex? Or did you genuinely like him?

Through the last few weeks you had been updating the man responsible for this on a near daily basis. You even talked about other things, becoming friends and meeting up for the other adult drinks on occasion, like now: coffee.

“Mhmm. Like we aren’t even together and yet we’re fighting?” You sighed, setting the cup down and staring at the liquid inside. “Everything really was fine, until he realized I was talking to you. But I’m not going to budge on that…” Even if it royally sucked.

It had been your first fight, Mingi catching you in a face call with Christian while you were hanging around your apartment. You hadn’t been doing anything wrong, Christian was just asking if you two were dating yet since Mingi had slept over for probably the seventh or eighth time. You woke up before him and had been enjoying your coffee, in nothing but Mingi’s shirt, when he had walked in with nothing on himself.

He had started in on you the moment you hung up.

“I thought you said you weren’t going to date him?!”

“I’m not- we’re just friends. I did promise to keep him in the loop. Besides, if not for him you never would have gotten in my bed.”

“So what he’s just waiting around until I fuck up to swoop in? Am I the rebound? The second choice still?”

It was the first time he had raised his voice, but wasn’t the last. Whatever you two had been drastically changed since then, but funnily enough he fucked you every weekend, stayed over and watched movies. Everything was fine normally until your relationship with each other was brought up, or your relationship with Christian. Only one of those you wanted to change.

“I didn’t want to go out dancing last weekend, he did. I didn’t hear from him at all but I ended up going over because I felt bad about the fight you know? And some fucking chick was leaving his apartment when I did. He was right there, standing shirtless in the doorway with hickies on his neck.” Your blood began to boil just remembering the scene so vividly.

Christian’s eyes went wide, hissing as if he was the one in pain. “He didn’t-”

With a solemn nod, you looked up at him. “He did.”

He leaned back in his seat, whistling. “I was wrong about him then, damn. Thought he would be man enough for you.”

“Well we were both wrong. I honestly think this was it. I told him I was done with him. He had the audacity to say I was fucking you so why couldn’t he fuck around? Plus, ‘not like we’re official or anything’.” You felt the burn behind your eyes, knowing tears were going to build up. You had cried then, hit his chest with the bag of breakfast you had brought for him, and told him just what you thought of his words.

Christian waited patiently to hear it, leaning in again, arms folding on the table now.

Letting out a shaky breath, you continued. “I told him I’ve been waiting for him to get his head out of his ass because while I didn’t want to date a guy who wants to dictate my friends, I wanted him. Wanted him to make it official. Wanted to do stupid couple things, and celebrate anniversaries and maybe get a dog together down the line- you know, that stupid stuff. And I've wanted to do it since that first weekend.” You rapidly blinked the tears away.

His hand covered yours on the coffee cup for some silent comfort. “Oh love, he really fucked up.”

“He did. I told him no more. He doesn’t get any more chances. I gave him enough. And I haven’t heard anything from him all week.” It had been an unspoken ritual for him to come over Friday night after you got off work. If he showed up now, you hoped it was to give your spare key back and nothing more.

Silence followed; you wallowed in your own self-pity and Christian thought to himself.

He broke it first. “Do you want me to come over tomorrow night? Or I can swing by Saturday morning?”

“And do what? I’ll probably deep clean my apartment and throw his shit out. Months, Christian. I wasted months on him for an almost relationship and for what? Just to have my heart broken. Fuck, outside of the fights he was-” You pulled your hand away from his. “I loved him. Still fucking do. If he came back crawling and begging right now I’d actually consider it. Just… I was so tired of his jealousy. That was his problem, and it was so shitty of him to expect me to cut you out just because he couldn’t handle it.”

“It wasn’t without reason though.” He mumbled so low you barely heard him.

But you did, shocking you enough your head snapped up to stare at him, mouth agape. “What do you mean?”

His own eyes widened as he shifted uncomfortably. “You weren’t supposed to hear that… shit.”

“Christian, what do you mean?” You leaned forward, brows pushed together in a frown.

You two stared off for a moment before he relented with a sigh. “I pushed you to go after him that night, and I was still an option. Love… I never stopped being an option, at least not from where I was sitting. And he probably knew that. From his perspective, why else would I be sticking around after I told you, literally, if he didn’t work out then I would take you out? On a date no less? Not just a fuck.”

You bit down on your lip, mulling over his words. He was right… but you had been so focused on Mingi and trying to have a relationship with him, you ignored the way Christian made you feel. He was still as attractive as the day you first met him, and now knowing his personality he was very likable.

“But Mingi…”

He smiled at your pout, standing up and leaning over the table. “Love, have I ever told you I swing both ways? You’ve told me enough about him, that if he did get his head out of his ass, I think you could have us both. I am definitely not against it but he’s the issue.”

He was so casual about it, as if pointing out the shade of lipstick you were wearing, or talking about his week, not confessing something that had your stomach in knots.

Yet you still hesitated. “And if he doesn’t get his shit together? If he and I are really done?”

“Then you have a really cool boyfriend who will give you the Princess treatment and still encourage you to ride another man’s dick: especially if they’ll ride mine too.” He kissed your forehead before grabbing your coffee cup and taking it over to the trash. “Think about it. I’ll be over Saturday night and no matter what you choose, I won’t get angry or upset with you. I respect any decision you make, Love.”

This was definitely a turn of events you never expected. Ever.

After parting ways your next work day went by in a daze, opting to invite some friends over Friday night: strictly girl friends.

Course, Wooyoung apparently counted. He even put his hair in pigtails and wore the girliest outfit he had. You protested, but he insisted he was only going to be there to be the driver home for the ladies, and cook.

Apparently he had heard about what happened from Yunho who, unbeknownst to you at the time, had heard your whole argument with Mingi. So in his own way, Wooyoung was trying to be there for you. The bottle of soju and chocolates had been his idea too.

It also didn’t help that aside from your best friend, his girlfriend, you only had two other friends, only one showing up. So bestie being bestie invited the girlfriends of Wooyoung’s friends.

The shit talking that was done after the second bottle of soju was emptied was glorious. Wooyoung looked rather pained, or at least feigned shame, every time he was talked about, but he was immediately reminded of how much he was loved with kisses after. They were good together, you thought, but it also left you a bit jealous.

Of course your own predicament was brought up, but by Yunho’s girlfriend, not Wooyoung like you suspected. So you spilled the details, alcohol contributing to your whole conversation with Christian also being aired. Then, bets placed on if you were going to end up with one boyfriend or two, no one even considering you saying no to Christian which, to be fair, was a safe bet.

“I think you’re going to end up with two.” Wooyoung added last, smirking over his water bottle. “You don’t hang out with us enough to know but most in our group either swing all ways or both ways. You know Seonghwa and Hongjoong are dating and they’ve shared a few girls before. In fact they’ve been seeing the same girl for a few weeks now I think they might invite her in. I didn’t invite her though.”

“Plus I know Mingi likes dick. Yunho’s told me about it.” As soon as Yunho’s girlfriend slipped the words out, she looked apologetic. “Sorry again, I really can’t seem to hold my tongue with alcohol.” Her words were even slurring a bit.

This was even more information you had not expected, just more to think about it seemed.

They left you without a decision but started a group chat because they were now invested in how things went. Over all, it put a lot into perspective, and left you hopeful.

Wooyoung didn’t seem bad, and the girls his friends dated were definitely chill. Sure you preferred to be alone, but if you were going to socialize you liked the idea of doing so with them. And Mingi? Christian?

Maybe it was the alcohol but your dreams were plagued by a scenario with them that had you aching for them both. It wasn’t uncommon for you to dream about Mingi like this, but with Christian in the mix… you were very hopeful.

A girl could dream right? (In this case, literally dream.)

Saturday evening rolled around and your hopes of last night had dwindled to anxious cleaning and worries once more that you had fucked things up beyond repair. You sent a text to Mingi to bring you the apartment key, preferably before seven, as you had company coming over.

You had been left on read, so you had no idea if he was going to stop by or not. The later it got, the more anxious you had become, until six rolled around, then… seven was dangerously close.

“This is it, it’s over.” You mumbled to yourself as you leaned against the back of your couch looking over the somewhat romantic table setting you had worked hard on. While Mingi hadn’t messaged you once, Christian had, talking about this evening and making plans with you.

The two of you decided to cook dinner together, eat, watch a movie and then if you had been comfortable he could stay over or he could head home. Either way, you had told him that you wanted a date before agreeing to anything, so this was it.

And still no Mingi.

Dejectedly you made your way to your bedroom, having done your hair and makeup already but finally slipping into the comfortable but flattering outfit you had picked out. Everything about your appearance was still very homey, comfortable, but with that hint of dressed-to-impress including the lingerie set underneath. One you had bought for Mingi but never got to show him. You had been saving it for when, if, he finally asked to make things official.

A little after seven there was a knock on your door. You knew it was Christian, he had texted you a minute ago that he had arrived and would see you shortly. You tried not to let the disappointment show as you opened the door, still wanting to give the man the attention he deserved.

“Hope you don’t mind, I found a stray outside and thought I’d bring him in.” Christian smiled at you as he drawled in his aussie accent, his presence already easing your nerves a bit. It really was so hard not to like him.

“Stray?” You opened the door further, eyes practically bulging out of your skull as you spotted Mingi standing with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hands and a sheepish expression. “Mingi?”

When you looked to Christian for an explanation, he happily supplied one. “He was pacing out front, nearly running when he saw me. I made him talk, we had a heart to heart, and now he’s here to beg your forgiveness. Aren’t you, bub?”

Mingi nodded, appearing much smaller than he actually was next to the man that was physically smaller, but older than him. “I’m sorry Princess I-”

You stopped him by holding a hand up. “Come inside and apologize properly.” You held the door open for them both, more flabbergasted by the whole situation than nervous now. The way Christian handled Mingi was just comedic, especially as the taller man stumbled forward and nearly tripped over his own feet.

“For you.” Mingi squeaked out as he handed you the flowers, then began to take his shoes off at Christian’s instruction. Just what sort of heart to heart did they have?

Both were dressed up, dark button ups and slacks, their hair styled a bit differently than their usual every day. It wasn’t overboard, but definitely gave the vibes of a date. You couldn’t help but think of this as a date with them both, smelling the flowers before making your way over to the kitchen to find a vase. You put these ones on the table as a centerpiece, smiling at the flowers.

“I like them but…” You turned, hands placed on your hips as you narrowed your eyes on Mingi. “This doesn’t mean you’re forgiven. I’m giving you one last chance.”

“I know. I heard from everyone all week how I fucked up. My own feelings don’t justify how I invalidated yours, over and over again Princess… and I’m sorry. I did something stupid and I really wish I could take it back.” He reluctantly stepped closer, Christian having to nudge him a bit before he went and made himself home in the kitchen.

The ease the tattooed Aussie expressed in your apartment was comforting. He relaxed you, often did or said what you needed to hear. No stress, no contempt, just a solid rock almost. And then there was Mingi, a fiery passion that made you feel alive, and often loved and giddy. Fire and water, and you liked them both. One snuck up on you, the other hit you with a force you had been fighting with since that first night you gave him a chance.

The night you gave them both a chance it seemed.

“But you did it Mingi. You were hypocritical for one, and just an insufferable asshole! I’m not waiting around anymore you understand? I’m not compromising further anymore. I know what I want and if you aren’t willing to do that, to be a part of my life in that way, then you can leave right now. Sorry or not, I-”

“I know.” He suddenly got on his knees before you, head down and arms at his side. “I’m willing to try. Fuck I should’ve been willing from the start. I was so sure you would compare me to him, that you would find him better, and wouldn't want me anymore. I didn’t think to communicate, to really hear what you wanted and not what would make me feel secure. You should never have to sacrifice for me security. I knew that and yet I kept asking. And then I couldn’t ask you to be my girlfriend if I was asking such a shitty thing right?”

You listened to his confession, listened to him ramble, but you could see Christian leaning against the doorway to your kitchen with some snack, popping it in his mouth like popcorn. He could be so unserious sometimes, and it was an effort not to smile at his antics.

“I thought you would pick him if you were given the actual option because hell, I’d pick him over me.” It was Mingi’s red ears that gave away what he truly meant by that.

Oh, he found him attractive. He was probably crushing too.

It was starting to look like Wooyoung was going to win that bet with the others.

“Mingi… I picked you over him. I did. I really fucking did. And you treated me like shit. Now I’m picking him-” You leaned down to grip his chin, pulling his face up when his shoulders had dropped dejectedly, “-and you. If you’ll try.”

His eyes flickered to Christian immediately. “Is he… okay with that?”

“Bub, it was my idea.” He smiled over at the two of you, setting aside the snacks before making his way over. “Why not give it a trial run? See how we work together? The chemistry is there and this might be me being a little impatient but, one night to see how we do? In the bedroom that is.”

You liked that idea far too much to pass it up, and by the glazed look in Mingi’s boba eyes… so did he.

Though you didn't jump right into it, insisting that you do the date part first. So the three of you cooked, the small kitchen feeling much too hot with the three of you. The number of times you felt a hand on you - hip, ass, back, shoulder- had you in need of a cold shower. You didn't even care about how the food tasted at this point, just wanting it done.

The icing on the cake was that Christian was just as touchy with Mingi but more subtle: his hip, back, arms to guide him around. He was finding any excuse to touch you both and Mingi seemed just as affected by it as you were.

While cooking dinner was practically a constant buildup of tension, eating was a bit more relaxing. The conversation was actually on the food, and the surprise that it came out pretty well. Which you suspected was mostly because of Christian as you hadn’t been able to focus. You teased him for it, and that was the first moment you saw him get flustered.

It was almost adorable how much they both got flustered and a little giggly when you would compliment them. You knew of Mingi’s habit before, but the fact Christian wasn’t much different… it put you in quite the teasing mood.

Where Christian would tease, you would tease right back, Mingi becoming a victim of you both especially during the movie. You couldn’t remember what movie it was, Christian on your left and Mingi on your right, dwarfing you on the sofa but it had been their hands that made it hard to focus. Christian had his right arm over the back of the seat, his fingers running up Mingi’s shoulder and neck casually or playing with his hair subtly. His other kept intentionally moving to draw your attention to his lap until you had thrown one leg over his thigh and he was now firmly holding it.

You would tease him by playing with his fingers, slowly inching his hand up your thigh on purpose. All while you had leaned into Mingi a bit, a hand resting on his thigh. You knew Christian’s touches affected him because you could feel his muscles tense up each time, your own teasing touches doing the same to his thighs.

The tension had grown so palpable it was a wonder none of you had snapped already. Just from the teasing, the way you moved your body to expose yourself to them, encouraging them to touch, you were practically begging for it. You didn’t even care about the movie anymore, constantly watching them. Your thoughts wondered how Christian would kiss you, if he would make Mingi watch, or if he would make you watch. The possibilities were endless but you were getting so impatient.

“Fuck this.” He seemed to be even more so, turning to face you more and leaning in to crash his lips to yours. You welcomed him, moving your own eager lips and lifting your hands to his shoulders to pull him closer.

Mingi whined behind you. “Princess-” He shifted behind you so your back was against his firm chest, his hands running over your sides to your stomach.

You let out a soft noise against softer lips at the touch, being sandwiched between them like this making you feel even smaller and much more wet between the thighs. You still weren’t entirely sure how this was going to work, since you’ve never had more than one partner in bed at the time, but the three of you would figure it out.

It didn’t matter if they took turns, at the same time, or with each other… as long as they did it quickly. You could feel how hard Mingi was against your back, his lips now on your neck as he watched the way Christian kissed you. When you did get a moment to breath, it was only because Christian’s lips were now on Mingi, pulling such a whiny moan from the bigger man it had your head spinning.

Wanting a better view, and to get your clothes off because it was far too hot, you pulled yourself off them and the couch. Christian immediately fell forward against Mingi, gripping his neck and pushing him down on the couch.

This was probably the hottest sight you ever had the pleasure to experience; you couldn’t tear your eyes away from it as you pulled your clothes off without a care where they fell… only leaving on the lingerie set.

Mingi caught a glimpse of you, pulling his mouth away to gape with swollen and wet lips from how hard the two had been making out. His eyes were glazed over with that familiar look, you knew he wasn’t going to be in charge of anything today. Perfect really, he looked so good whenever he let you use him to get off.

Christian had also turned when Mingi did, his breath catching in his throat. With a groan he sat back and began unbuttoning his shirt. “You look beautiful, Love. I’m not the only impatient one am I?” He pulled the shirt off and tossed it aside,, exposing tattoos up both arms and down his chest that both you and Mingi were admiring with similar drooling expressions on your face.

He patted Mingi’s thigh as he stood up. “Strip big boy, I want to gawk too.”

The way Mingi scrambled up to get his clothes off as Christian swooped in and picked you up had your giggles turning into a gasp. You could feel how hard he was, your wet panties pressed against his clothed bulge and you couldn’t help but to grind down. The friction had your head falling back, giving access to the attack of love bites he was now pressing against the curve of your neck. He carried you down the hall to your room with a little guidance from Mingi who was now in just his briefs with a noticeable wet spot.

Christian didn’t put you down like you first expected, instead holding you against him while massaging your ass and grinding into you almost like a needy pup. He pulled his lips from the curve of your breast to look at Mingi. “On the bed, naked. Can’t forget you made her cry, that’s not going to fly anymore you understand?”

With heated boba eyes, he nodded. “I won’t. No more jealousy. I’ll make it up to her for the rest of my life if I have to.”

Christian smirked against your shoulder, “that’s what I like to hear.” A moment later he was setting you down on Mingi’s thighs, his cock right in front of you. “But let’s see how you can handle it really. Watch her face as I fuck her? Make her feel good? Just like you have been dreaming about, yeah bub?”

You and Mingi both whined in response.

Without being told, and much too eager for your own good, you leaned forward and lifted your hips. “Please, I don’t want to wait any longer.” After all you had technically been thinking about this since he left you after your coffee meetup.

Glancing over your shoulder, your breath lodged in your throat momentarily at the expression Christian wore: full of impatience, lust, and a bit of disbelief. The impatience won out as he pulled the rest of his clothes off quickly and climbed on the bed, knees on either side of Mingi’s legs but nudging your own further apart until you were pressed against Mingi and could feel his cock against your mound and stomach. “Prep first love, I’m not his size but I don’t want to hurt you for our first time.”

He only pushed your panties aside before pushing in two fingers, pulling your cheek away so he could see your cunt better even knuckle deep. You couldn’t watch well, too focused on the pleasure to keep yourself controted at such an angle and Christian was determined to press all the right buttons.

Mingi wasn’t going to just lay there it seemed, his hands finding your waist as he lifted his hips to grind his cock against you, the fabric of your panties getting pushed up more by his action.

Christian had other ideas, smacking both his hands while his fingers still fucked you with intention of spreading you out. “Aht, bubs, you’re still getting punished.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss against the center of your back, his cock heavy on the curve of your ass as he did so. “Love, hold his hands down. Don’t have to be too rough, just make sure he doesn’t move. Bubs is going to be a good boy and keep still though, aren’t you?”

You eagerly did as you were told, holding Mingi’s wrists as you pushed your hips back to meet Christian’s hand. Mingi was watching you both with his brows pushed up and pretty thick lips parted, looking so cute. The whole situation was quite hot, yet it still wasn’t enough.

Before you could beg, Christian was pulling his fingers out and leaning over you, tapping Mingi’s lips with them. He didn’t even have to tell Mingi what to do before the man was latching his pretty mouth over the appendages, tongue wrapping around as he sucked them clean. You were so fascinated by the visage that the cock suddenly spreading your hole further took you by surprise.

Christian wasn’t small, you suspected he wasn’t, but it was hard to beat Mingi’s monster cock. That didn’t discourage him, burying himself to the hilt and pressing down on your back to angle you just right that you felt him in all the right spots. A nice little perk was that it pressed your mound harder down on Mingi’s cock, the first thrust Christian gave sliding you up and rubbing your clit against him.

Yes, he wasn’t small but he knew just how to use you.

He kept his hand on the small of your back as he leaned back, holding you there as his hips built up a slow but harsh pace that had you sliding up Mingi’s cock and back down with each thrust. “Feels better than I imagined Love, and your pretty sounds- mmm fucking hell you’re addicting.”

You hadn’t even realized you were moaning and whimpering until he pointed it out, all your focus that wasn’t taken up by his cock had been on keeping your position still.

Mingi’s arms twitched under your hands, soft pants leaving his lips just above your head as you rested it on his chest. You gasped out as your head was suddenly pulled back, your expression on display as Christian had a fistful of your hair, grunting out, “he needs to see you.”

You locked eyes with Mingi, licking your lips at how delicious he looked, but his eyes did flicker back to Christian behind you quite a bit. Oh you wanted to know what sort of expression he made, but the thought was dashed when you felt a second intrusion in your cunt: he was pushing a finger in, stretching you out further even as his cock kept pushing in.

Eyes rolling back, the stimulation of your clit and his cock, had you coming and tightening your walls around him. “Shit, Love, not so tight-” Christian groaned out, hips stuttering in his pace as he tightened his hold on your hair. “Gotta stretch you out.”

“W-what for?” You gasped out, body still reeling from the orgasm and walls fluttering around his cock.

He chuckled, pushing a second finger in once you relaxed once more. “To take us both of course.”

Mingi’s eyes went wide, eyebrows scrunched so far up it was almost comical, but you couldn’t laugh considering you were just as shocked.

“Excuse me?” You gasped out, bouncing on his cock once more as he picked up his pace.

“You heard me love. I want you to take both of our cocks in your sweet cunt. What better way to see if this will work? To show we can really share? Other than by sharing your sweet fucking pussy?” He pulled out slowly with each sentence just to slam in before starting the next, tits bouncing with each thrust and hardened nipples scraping against Mingi’s chest.

“Thought I was getting punished?” Mingi groaned beneath you, clearly trying his best not to move but he was lifting his chest just a bit to feel your tits on you more, his tongue constantly flicking out as he watched them.

Christian let go of your hair to instead grab your throat and you could feel the metal of his rings against your esophagus as he leaned forward. “Have you not yet realized I want you too big boy? And I want to feel that pretty fucking cock rubbing against mine as her delicious cunt squeezes us both so tightly we’re seeing heaven.”

You and Mingi both whined at that, resulting in a chuckle from Christian as he pushed in a third finger and pushed them apart to stretch you out even more. It was a bit uncomfortable, never having been so stretched out before, but you knew this was nothing compared to how they would both feel inside you.

Once the man felt satisfied, he pulled out completely, dropping your neck gently before he flipped you around so your back was against Mingi’s chest. “Hold her legs.”

Mingi complied immediately, his head slotted next to yours as his hands were gripping the back of your knees and holding your legs up and wide.

Christian grinned at the sight, tongue playing with his bottom lip while he took a moment to touch you both. “Such a pretty cock-” He was gripping Mingi’s shaft now, lifting it to line his tip with your cunt you were sure was gaping for them, “-and such a beautiful pussy. Going to look so good, all connected, yeah?”

Meeting Mingi’s eyes, Christian nodded in a silent command before watching Mingi push in, shifting you down his body a little so you could take more of his cock easier. With how stretched out you were, Mingi slipped in so easy but there was still a stretch the deeper he went and it felt amazing. You could never get used to how good he felt inside, each time just as new and exciting as the first.

“I could get used to watching this.” Christian hummed before adjusting himself to crouch on his feet, adjusting himself so that his own cock lined up with your entrance. He braced himself on the back of your thing, guiding his tip in before bringing his thumb to your clit. He rubbed soft circles as he pushed in, attempting to be gentle as the stretch was now painful. “I know love, but you can take it. You’re such a good girl, I know you can take it. Mmm look at that, halfway in.” He paused, panting.

“So… fucking… tight-” MIngi groaned against your ear, voice gruff from his own pleasure. You knew he was trying to control himself, his grip almost bruising as he watched Christian continue to push in while rubbing your bundle of nerves.

Soon enough they were both balls deep inside you, all three of you panting from the effort as you tried to adjust but they felt so big and you couldn’t stop clenching down around them. Mingi sounded as if he was one thrust away from cumming inside you, and maybe that was all the three of you had.

Christian didn’t stop rubbing your clit, easing away the pain until you were whimpering and grabbing his forearm. “P-please- just fuck me already. Wanna cum with you both. Wanna fill how big I get.” Your other hand pressed down on your lower stomach, and that was the final trigger.

They both began to thrust into you harshly, your cries quickly filling the room as your head fell back. “Oh fuck oh God yes yes please!” quickly became too jumbled up to be decipherable from the intense pleasure they fucked into you.

It was unlike anything you had ever felt, so full, so thoroughly stretched out with every single nerve ending getting rubbed just right that you were on the cusp of soaking all of you.

When Mingi reached up and grabbed the back of Christian’s neck, pulling him down to crush his lips to his own, you hit your release with a silent scream. Your walls pulsated around them both,adding pressure that had them moaning into each other’s mouths until they were filling you up just as you promised.

The three of you were a sweaty, convulsing mess as you rode out your climaxes together, panting in each other’s ears and struggling to remember how your lungs work.

You tapped Christian’s shoulder, turning your head to kiss him, the Mingi, taking turns swapping spit and tongue and watching them do the same until their softening cocks and the leaking cum was becoming uncomfortable.

“S-shower?” You rasped out, gently pushing Mingi’s hands off you so your legs could straight out a bit, pushing Christian off in the process.

“We can.” The aussie grinned as he sat next to you both. “Or we can try a few more dynamics?”

You playfully hit his shoulder, glancing back at Mingi. “We’ll have plenty of time for that, won’t we baby? You did say forever right?”

Mingi blushed a bit but nodded. “Yes… You have us both.”

You licked your lips, cupping both of their cheeks. “Mmm, two of the hottest, most adorable dorks, just for me?”

“Just for you.” They said together, grins almost matching. You could live with that.

| @minheeskitten | @sousydive | @alextheweeb7 | @thesafecafe | @euphoricem

| @meepsters-world | @mysticfire0435 | @yejisuu | @apriecotte | @amphiroxx 

| @cloudysannie | @sugarnspice630 | @isiloiale | @plutoneu | @venn-ie

| @therealcuppicake | @lavishloving | @pearltinyy | @vampiregirl215

| @heihaneul | @gugggu6gvai | @oddinaryxfever | @smally97 | @pandagirl-016

| @hecateslittlewitchling | @arinyyy | @lovelgirl22 | @stayatinykatsy | @noone356097 |

@bunnliix | @skteezcursed

[eureka-its-zico]

Winterfall

Synopsis: When you thought of your life, Glenview Psychiatric Hospital was the last place you thought you’d end up. What could be weirder than calling a place like this home? Finding people who remind you that, sometimes, the messiest parts of who we are can be the best parts of us too.

Pairings: Christian Yu x Reader x Jay B x Reader (It’s a love triangle, y’all) 

Series: ongoing 

Word Count: 5186

Warnings: mentions of self-harm, mental health issues, mental disorders, slight violence, sexual themes

A/N: This is a hard one to post. I’ve had this in my WIPs for over seven years. I’ve rewritten it multiple times. Consider if this was a series, I was willing to share. As someone who suffers from BPD II and PTSD, it felt strange to dive into mental health. In a way, I felt like I needed a safe place to get it out. To share. This fic isn’t meant to be sad. It’s meant to be about growth. The journey of mental health can be a messy one, but it doesn’t have to hinder our own growth. Our sadness does not define us. If I ever miss anything in the warnings for chapters, please let me know and I’ll fix it ASAP! This fic is loosely based off of one of my favorite films, Girl, Interrupted. And remember, if you you ever need to talk: Im here.

Shout out to my bestie @deadneverlander for always being the better half in our clownery. I wouldn't be able to do half of this without you.

There was something about the bleakness of winter that seemed to make countless people’s bones ache for the warmth of summer. Their loneliness is somehow made more apparent by rain clouds and negative degrees, turning thoughts into reminiscent scenes of a doomsday film. 

You’d always claimed that fall was your favorite season because the vast spectrum of your sadness didn't match the heat of summer. Sure, you loved the possibilities of hot cocoa, warm fires, ridiculous horror, Christmas films, and the first sight of snow. Somewhere along the way, however, came the anxiety of holiday dinners. Where the comfort you’d found in overcast skies turned sinister with repeated looks that reminded you that you were the black sheep; the odd man out with another year of nothing to show.

Fall no longer meant binges on shows and breaks from the endless routine that was work and school. It meant laying in the snow until your body heat forced it to melt underneath you, seeping into the fabric of your clothes to leave your nerves numb and transparent like ice. Your mind silently hoped it would be enough to extinguish the agony that blossomed in your chest. 

Jackets were no longer marked for warmth, but strictly to hide your struggle to feel anything past the chasm that’d grown in the past couple of months: to bleed out the parts of you that didn't belong. It wasn't a surprise it's what landed you a one-way ticket to the cozy room inside a psychiatric hospital. Maybe that's just what happens when you're found unresponsive with a belly housing a fifth of rum. The marks on your skin lay like a map to follow on how you got there; only being found like a frantic afterthought. 

Glenview Psychiatric Hospital, or GSH that was strategically labeled in bright crimson above the pocket of your prison-inspired sweatshirt, had been home for three months now. It was meant to be a place of healing, among the basic mood stabilizing and therapy sessions everyone held in a day. You felt further away from that concept with every group activity the doctors forced you to take part in. Your social anxiety becoming apparent each time it lands on you to speak, either to close the circle, or to be a part of the ridiculous game activities. The last time you played volleyball your face saw more action with the pleather ball than your arms ever did. 

It was currently 12:47 p.m. The clock giving you a false sense of hope that the time wouldn’t just creep by to leave you stranded the last thirteen minutes until you’d earned your freedom. There was, however, the off chance if Dr. Thompson wasn't hearing what he wanted; the hour-long group activity would be extended. 

You scanned the other six faces that made up your group: the huddled mess of piled sweaters and huddled blanket of Soomi a fleeting moment of comfort. It only took your eyes adjusting on her figure to know she didn’t have one. Her tiny body composed of thick layers of clothes to portray a false sense of shape. Her anorexia becoming so severe her family had no other option but to put her here, or watch her die. Jason’s endless finger taps on every surface he could touch the only giveaway to his OCD until he removed himself from his chair. Sejun with his alcoholism and Yuna with her acidic imagination that the wind whispered her deepest secrets out into the world. 

All this ending with your gaze narrowed on the statuesque figure of Jaebum who comically sat opposite of your current position. The two suicidal inmates that shared in the anxiousness of sadness but little else, and the usual reason why your group never seemed to end on time. 

You couldn't say it was a shame to be stuck sitting dead center of someone so attractive; as shallow of an observation as it was there was no denying how ungodly true that statement was. He held a silent attractiveness that resonated in the solitude he kept around himself, and Jaebum was indeed a solitary creature.

He preferred books over people. Usually moving away from anyone who got close to his latest reading perch without ever glancing up from his current book. Jaebum’s favorite place he’d reserved to get lost inside his fiction the seal of the window that looked out the expanse of the institute’s backyard. The entire estate currently covered in the dead burgundy and gold of a forest of oak tree leaves. 

It wasn't like you were laying avid amounts of your attention on him or anything. You didn't pay attention to how broad his shoulders looked in his old man sweaters that you could've bet money smells like mothballs. How his features seemed sharpened to match the fierceness that lived inside his eyes. The only thing that exposed his softness was the speck of a mole that dusted itself on his left eyelid. 

Jaebum just held a presence that demanded to be noticed. Whether he himself liked it or not. 

“Jaebum: do you have anything you’d like to add to the session?”

Dr. Thompson’s question made the both of you jolt in your seats. Youwere too busy staring down at your nails while you plucked away at the cuticles. Jaebum's head turned, unbeknownst to you, from looking at you to the good doctor. It was enough to make your cheeks flush hot. 

His crossed arms gave a soft shrug, and you hated how your eyes stayed captivated by the movement. You were willing to blame it on the charcoal-worn cable knit sweater he favored. It really did smell like moth balls and age making you willing to bet it wasn't his to begin with. 

“We talked about this guys. Shrugging is not an adequate substitute for an answer.”

His tone showing his frustration more than anger at his need to repeatedly inform the group. Dr. Thompson looked at each of you individually until he stopped on Jaebum, who didn’t seem the least bit moved. 

“I have nothing to say.”

A sigh escaped from Dr. Thompson’s lips as his head shook softly. His eyes averted down to the tin clipboard momentarily before they resumed their previous position. 

“And what is it exactly you would like me to add, huh?” You felt your body tense against the chair. Your hands grasping at its edges like it would be the only thing to keep you stable against the oncoming rage that was Jaebum’s agitation. “We do these pointless sessions over and over: again and again. For what? Do you think it “saves” anyone?”

Your eyes diverted from the safety of your knees; counting every frayed piece of cloth on your jeans that hung loose from torn holes. No part of you needed to acknowledge that he was standing. The room did that well enough with the tension his power caused. The room itself swelling with anxiety that made fidgety Sera begin to rock violently against the back of her chair. Her head shaking hair into her face, like a curtain to hide what she feared was coming her way like the abusive hands of her father. 

The orderlies were already beginning to circle his chair, but Dr. Thompson held up a hand of warding. He reminded you too much of an irresponsible ring handler at a circus. Unwilling to recognize his own tiger was about to maim him. 

“No, no that’s fair enough. I see you have an issue with the way we try and help our patients.”

“Help?!” Jaebum snarled. “Is that what you call it? Like you helped Simon remember all the things he wanted to forget! Is that what you call endless therapies until he killed himself! You consider being helpful with the way you handled Ian?”

Dr. Thompson regarded Jaebum quietly, but his eyes were focused and searching the young man’s face. You watched in helpless awe as one stood like a calm in a blazing storm, while the other raged so furiously you thought the walls would come down. No longer was his voice a strong current, but now thunderous words that hurled like lightning bolts were being directed at the man before him. 

Jaebum was right. Sometimes, the doctors picked and picked a part at you until you were left bare and raw. And if their words didn’t do it their physical methods picked up where they lacked. His anger was justified, because deep down so were you. But you didn’t have the towering strength like he did to stand up to anyone. Your fear of the seclusion rooms kept you prisoner: locked in your chair as a simple flick of Dr. Thompson’s hand sent the orderlies rushing to Jaebum’s side. 

“I think that’s enough for today’s session.” 

In the back of your mind you knew that Jaebum was right. In part. Who were counselors and psychologists to tell the broken mirrors of people how to put their pieces back together? Only to end up with more blood on their hands from struggling to put sharp pieces in place. They studied people like you, Jaebum...people like Ian who were features in their college books. They themselves barely ever one to experience it themselves. 

Healing, even if unconventional, was still healing in the end. There was no right or wrong way to get there, but here, with people like Dr. Thompson, their textbook solutions were the only solutions. Maybe that’s why it backfired so terribly with Ian. 

So for once, you wanted to stand up with Jaebum. To call out the injustices of treatments forced on patients, like Ian. Treatments they’d placed on patients that only wanted to forget, because no one wants to remember traumas and everything that makes them feel like failures. 

You knew, however, if you took that chance to be brave for once you would end up like Jaebum. Uselessly struggling against orderlies who came prepared with syringes to make you complacent and an endless day being locked for god knew how long inside seclusion. 

It was cowardice that kept your mouth shut. All of you stayed quiet as an orderly you aptly nicknamed, “The Bull,” grabbed at the neck of Jaebum’s sweater. That was all it took for him to react violently. Jaebum’s elbow flew back with such force it dislodged The Bull’s grip, which only seemed to make it worse. 

“Jaebum, please do not struggle.” Dr. Thompson’s voice didn’t sound as soothing as he probably imagined. Obvious agitation outlined every word; the struggle forcing all of you up from your chairs and away from the fighting. “Everyone out. Now.” 

A part of you hated listening. For not firmly digging your feet in to stand for something you agreed wasn’t right. It was an odd thought. Since Ian was the usual instigator of the chaos of how these ended. Never Jaebum. Maybe he just felt like in Ian’s absence he needed to take over for him. 

“You play god with everyone’s emotions and leave them to drown alone in the aftermath. You are the reason Christian keeps escaping and Hyujin is gone! It’s you! It’s all of you!”

Jaebum’s rage became more apparent with each sentence and broke as his throat formed the words of his former friend. Former because he’d found himself as one of Dr. Thompson’s experimental new treatments. A treatment that brought back too much Hyujin couldn’t cope with - was forced to confront - before he was ready. 

The ward still felt hollow - missing in the sound of Hyujin’s laugh. 

You would’ve been impressed with the way Jaebum was laying into the doctor. He was holding his own against the orderly at his arms until the Bull snuck behind him and brought him falling down to the cold concrete floor. 

That was the last you saw of Jaebum as you were ushered outside the doors. You faced them for a long time. No one questioned why you stood at the entrance as Jaebum’s yelling dulled to nothing. It was too late for you to run back and play the role of knight in shining armor and standing in front of the door would only make the staff assume you were waiting to cause a scene. 

Turning on your heel you headed towards the living area. Your mind racing heavily with indecision and not paying attention to the overcrowded chairs and couches. You bypassed them all to head to your favorite window seat. It was opposite to the one everyone knew as Jaebum’s; reading a new book every week during free time. It was so engrained to the fabric of the facility that no one tried to take it from him. Not even Ian. 

You folded into yourself as soon as you sat down on the window seat. Your chin pressed into your shoulder so you could get a better look outside. The vibrant colors of changing leaves reminding you that fall was coming. Maybe they would let you work outside if you were good? You were tired of doing bathroom and kitchen duties, but because of Ian’s latest stunt no one was allowed outside. Not until the fences were made higher with wire curled along the top. 

If thoughts could be breathed into existence, you were positive you alone would be deemed responsible for Ian walking, right then and there, through the facility's double doors. Of course, Ian could never simply enter a room quietly.

Christian entered every room like a force. Wild and unpredictable. Mother Nature couldn’t compete with his massive hurricane personality. No one could come close, because underneath all that unhinged nature was a magmatism that far outreached just good looks. 

Was Christian good looking? Devilishly so. It was his way with words, however, that left many people reeling. Not just fellow patients, but staff as well. He was painfully charming and, if you weren’t prepared for his wide-set smile directed in your direction, you were going to find yourself in trouble. Deep, deep Christian-flavored trouble. The staff had even labeled him with a warning of “verbal jujitsu” - you had to stay miles ahead of the conversation or you’d find yourself like the recently fired psych tech who’d handed over the ward keys without a second thought.

Seriously. That’s how Christian escaped this time. All the other times, well, the man could be considered the second coming of Houdini. 

“How have you been, Bob? Are your feet still giving you grief, Margo?”

It was impressive how he acted like it wasn’t a big deal he’d magically reappeared. The guard and orderlies awkwardly keep watch over the double doors he’d come through like he’d disappear back into thin air. 

You hated how happy you became hearing the richness of his voice. The way his accent reminded you of the battle of wills on what was the proper way to say, “water,” and the teasing you gave him about constantly saying, “Naurr”. 

“It’s Margaret, jackass,” the older psych tech mumbled in reply. She didn’t even bother to look up from putting a new bandage on Bob’s hands.

“Missed you too, babe.” 

You watched his reflection in the safety of the glass of the window. You didn’t want to show how eager you were to see him - or to find out that every time he left the ward became almost too much to bear alone. 

In the safety of the window, you could pretend the call to freedom was what kept your eyes hypnotized. Not the sleeveless tee he’d tucked inside the waist of skinny jeans that hugged to the muscles like paint or the layers of tattoos that covered honey skin. He wasn’t tan when he’d left. Where had Ian’s adventures taken him this time? 

You would get the chance to ask him yourself. 

When his eyes caught sight of your huddled frame curled in the window seat his trajectory changed completely. He didn’t think you’d noticed him yet, but it didn’t stop his infamous megawatt smile from brightening up his features and the butterflies he’d left trapped in your gut instantly springing back to life. 

The only downside? You were more than positive Ian saw you only as a sister. If he’d thought of you in the past as anything else you would’ve definitely known by now. As much as Ian was known for his charisma and whirlwind energy, he was also known for slipping into the janitor’s closet with more than a few now-fired staff members. 

In a matter of seconds, he left the mirage of the window to become real beside you. The smell of cigarettes and his preferred cologne enveloped you, instantly turning the space intimate. You tried your best to ignore him. Ian would receive nothing but the side eye from you after the latest shit he’d pulled. 

He let out a heavy sigh as a finger playfully poked into your side. He wiggled the digit in a weak attempt to tickle you thinking it would be enough for you to finally look at him. Fat chance. Using your elbow, you pushed down with just enough force to dislodge him from your side. The act forced a heavy sigh to flare his nostrils as he leaned back against the window. 

“Come on, ‘Roo. You can’t be that mad at me?”

Of course, he would use your nickname. The nickname you earned one night when he’d tried to tickle you until you couldn’t breathe. To be honest, he thinks you’d kicked him accidentally in the chest because you might wet yourself. The truth? Ian had gotten dangerously close. A few times it felt like his lips were just a few sharp breaths away from landing on yours, and that night you’d felt hollow. So hollow. All you wanted was to burn and Ian…he was so full of fire and life and for once you wanted to know what it felt like to be filled with something other than emptiness. 

You wanted to catch fire too. 

So you’d kicked out at him in panic. Hence how you became his Kangaroo. His ‘Roo. 

“Actually,” you began, biting out the world with each syllable. “I can be upset with you and I most definitely am.”

“Don’t be like that, ‘Roo. I know you missed me.”

“No, I didn’t. It was rather peaceful while you were off on whatever antics you decided to get into.”

A tsk sent his bottom lip into a pout as he crossed his arms. His shoulders lean further down the window and slightly into your view. 

God, why did he have to be so heartbreakingly handsome? 

You refused to make eye contact with him. Don’t do it. It’s a trick. You knew it was a trick. A sneaky ploy and yet…you looked. One look was all it took and Ian knew he had you.

“I missed you.” His voice caressed your skin like velvet causing it to erupt in goosebumps. “So, I know if I missed you that can only mean that you missed me.”

A snort of disbelief left you as you finally gave him what he’d been asking: your full and undivided attention.  

“Is that how it works, Ian?”

“Ah!” He beamed. “She finally looks at me.” 

You couldn’t keep your eyes from rolling as you tried to face away from him, but Ian wasn’t having it. 

“I shouldn’t even do that.”

“Where is all this hostility coming from?” He pouted. “Did you experience another one of Dr. Thompson’s riveting group circles?”

“It’s not funny, Ian. You always leave.” You hated how your voice betrayed you. The way it cracked before you could glue it back together. “You go and leave me here, without you, all the time. One of these days you may not come back.”

All the playfulness slowly drained from his features. The sly smile wilted to a grimace as deep brown eyes scanned over your face. Calculating your words with the body language of guarded arms and saddened eyes. His hands gently grabbed at your elbows to loosen your arms before turning you to him. His head dipped down just a bit to make sure he had you at eye level. 

“Hey, ‘Roo. I’m sorry. I come back for you, you know that right?” You knew he was lying, but try telling that to the butterflies fluttering around like crazy in your gut. “These assholes could never catch me if I didn’t turn myself in, and I only turned myself in to get back to you.” 

You didn’t know what you would’ve said at that moment. Maybe something he wanted to hear or maybe - finally - you’d have the guts to call him out on his bullshit. Luckily for you, the muffled sound of Jaebum’s screaming slowly grew louder until his struggling body was brought through the double doors from therapy. 

“Let me go, you assholes!”

You’d never seen Jaebum fight so fiercely before. The way he flailed his arms to find a way to get them released along with his legs kicking out like a madman. They practically dragged him down the hall towards seclusion. For a split second, in his struggle, his eyes landed on you. His gaze held yours for what felt like a lifetime until the spell was broken. It felt like slow motion as his face turned to see Ian on your right and all the fight drained from his body. 

Did he think he was fighting for Ian? Himself? Jaebum was never much for acting out. That was usually Ian who created trouble. Maybe that was why he looked so shocked seeing Jaebum being dragged down to seclusion. 

“Oi! What the fuck is this?”

Ian was up off the window seat in seconds. A couple of orderlies were already coming out from behind the nursing station to meet him halfway. Whatever they were saying, you weren’t all too sure. Ian was doing his usual of screaming and shoving causing the orderlies to prepare for a fight. The patients closest to all the commotion desperately trying to get out of the way. 

It was all chaos. All classic Ian. The only non-classic thing was Jaebum looking at you in a way you’d never noticed before. It created a row of questions that sat heavily on your tongue and ones you weren’t sure he would ever be willing to answer. 

It wasn’t until everything had settled down again that you snuck inside the room that held group therapy. Your eyes instantly homing in on Jaebum’s chair and underneath it one of his grandfather’s books. 

Before you dared to push all the way through into the room you gave one last cautious glance to the recreation room and slipped inside. You made sure to hold the door so it didn’t click into place. There was no denying if you were caught sneaking in somewhere you weren’t meant to be you’d be joining Jaebum in your own seclusion room. 

The sterile room with its egg-white walls was most definitely not your favorite. The only way to add your own source of color to its walls was to display your thoughts - projecting them out like a fucked up home movie that you’d rather forget. 

You made sure to cut across the room silently. Your legs bending at the knee to swoop down to grab the worn-down cover and secure it to your chest. 

You couldn’t explain why as you made your way out of the room towards the upper floor that held the seclusion rooms what made you want to do this for him. It’s not like he would thank you, but you weren’t looking for that. 

It wasn’t hard to notice the way Jaebum cared for his late grandfather's things. From the sweater he wore daily that was meticulously cleaned and laundered to the few books Jaebum was able to keep from his collection. He coveted them the way others valued trophies but it wasn’t praise that Jaebum found secluded inside their pages: it was peace. 

You didn’t know much about him. Jaebum wasn’t much of a sharer. He was reserved. The only way to know him was by the pages you held close to your chest. So, you weren’t terribly sure why you were doing this for him except for the fact you believed no one should go without something that they loved. 

Just as you were about to round the last corner to the hallway that held seclusion rooms 1 through 3, you caught a flash of an orderly speaking to a nurse. From the brief moment you’d caught before you found the safety of the opposite wall, they were more than likely flirting. 

Ted. That was the name written on his uniform. He’d called Ian a “Psycho,” a handful of times. You wondered if Ted knew the nurse he worshiped spent the same handful of nights sneaking inside Ian’s dorm. 

“Do you maybe want to go get breakfast in the morning?” 

Breakfast?! You mouthed to yourself before you snuck another peek around the corner. 

“Oh, I don’t know, Ted. I might have plans later.”

If your eyes could roll back any harder you would’ve seen brain cells. You knew exactly what her supposed plans were. You could already hear the moans that echoed down the halls like a haunting. The only thing haunted here would be you. 

You didn’t have to see Ted’s expression to know he was defeated. He was probably wondering how someone could refuse breakfast or maybe he was finally growing tired of being told no. The mystery of the unknown in this love triangle would sadly (not really) remain a mystery. You didn’t really care if they had breakfast together or hunted Easter eggs. You just wanted them to finish their awkward conversation and leave the damn hallway. 

A few more strangled pieces of conversation later and you could hear the shuffling of feet. Quickly, you moved inside a linen closet and quietly shut the door. Your ears straining - waiting - to hear a pair of feet move past your location so you could finish what you came to do. 

Every second you were out here and not inside your own dorm waiting for the nurses to come in and check you were there was one second too many in a chance at punishment. After a few more minutes went by and the coast sounded relatively clear, you creeped out from the linen closet and dashed towards the seclusion rooms. 

“Jaebum!?” You half whispered half yelled. “Jay!”

“What the hell are you doing over here?”

Ah, there was that condescending voice you’d grown accustomed to. Following the sound of his voice, and with the help of his fingers hanging out of the small seclusion window, you darted towards the back of the hall. Your arms still securely held onto his grandfather’s book and only began to loosen as you got closer to the door. 

“I wanted to bring you something before they placed it in lost and found.” 

With another cautious glance down the hall, your fingers wrapped around the edges of the book's spine. You offered it up to him and gently started to push it through the small window. Jaebum hadn’t spoken since he noticed what you held in your hands. His fingers overlapped yours as he took it from you. His arms immediately brought it inside with him with the sound of pages flipping while he made sure each page was still accounted for. 

“How did you-“ he began, but his words quickly died out. 

“Can you believe it ladies and gentlemen? For once, he was too stunned to speak,” you teased. 

Jaebum’s eyes narrowed in on your face. His hands wagged the book as if he was going to hit you over the head with it. Who knows, he might have if there wasn’t a 30-pound door stationed between you. 

“I’m serious. You came all this way to give me this?”

You shrugged his words off like what you’d done wasn’t a big deal. Both of you knew it was. So many factors that could lead you to where he was, or worse, if they believed you were trying to steal someone else’s property. Which, they one hundred percent would even though kleptomania wasn’t part of your conga line list of disorders. 

“I remember how much his things matter to you. I didn’t want Bull or Kojak The Great Dick to get a hold of it. I know they wouldn’t have respected it after today.”

You’d expected a lot of things to come out of this exchange. The main one? At least a thank you. All you were getting now felt like the cold shoulder that featured a very unnerving stare. With every second you were feeling more self-conscious and it took everything in you not to shout, “Boo!” in an attempt to get him to blink. 

You couldn’t take the awkwardness of the exchange any longer. Your feet were already backpedaling as your arms swung, thumb extended out, to indicate your exit before you spoke. 

“Great well, this was a fun chat-“

“He lies to you, you know.”

Jaebum’s words took you by surprise. You were sure that was the point. His face was set in deep lines of determination as if what he needed to say was something you needed to adhere to like the gospel from the Bible. 

“Okay, Jay I’ll bite: who is he?”

“You know who I’m talking about. Ian. It’s who he is. He doesn’t know how to tell the truth, and you always set yourself up for failure with him.”

Maybe Jaebum thought he was being helpful - calling to light all things you were aware of but couldn’t bring yourself to say out loud. You must have seemed too weak - gullible - in his eyes for him to believe he needed to say these things. 

You eyed him coolly through the window. Your tongue rolled around inside your cheek trying to decide what exactly you should say at this moment. Did he want recognition that you knew you were an idiot? What did it matter to him if you knew Ian didn’t give two fucks about you. 

So, the only thing you could settle on was the beginning of a long sigh before you spoke: “I know I might look like a love-sick puppy to you, Jay, but I know my place.”

He tried saying your name to stop you. You just ignored him as you shook your head and allowed yourself to begin to move back down the hall towards the safety of your own dorm. 

“It’s alright, Jay I get it. Take care of your grandfather’s things better, okay?”

You didn’t wait to finish your sentence before you were already turning to head down the hallway. The bottom of your feet itching for you to sprint in the opposite direction. Your mind raced over Jaebum’s words and matched them with the growing chasm in your chest.

So lost in your head, you barely caught the sound of his parting, “Thank you,” as you bolted around the corner. 

[cococharm]

ONE ↭ club venus

Club Venus was alive tonight, like it always was on a Friday. The flashing lights painted the scene in electric blue and magenta. Y/n balanced a tray full of cocktails, dodging rowdy patrons. After seven months of working there, the chaos had become familiar—comforting even—though she still felt like an outsider at times.

Her gaze flickered across the room, eventually landing on him. Christian Yu was impossible to miss, like a statue carved from granite. Broad shoulders, a sharp jaw, and an expression that promised he’d break bones without hesitation. Unapproachable. Intimidating. Yet, like every other girl at the club, Y/n’s eyes were drawn to him. In the months she had been there, they’d hardly exchanged more than a few words, but there was something about Christian that tugged at her.

It wasn’t just the way he looked, though that alone was enough to make her heart race. He was a mystery, and she couldn't help but watch him. Every now and then, she’d catch him glancing her way. He’d offer a brief nod or a small smile, but Y/n always looked away quickly. His size, the depth of his voice, and his reputation scared her just enough to keep her distance.

She approached the bar, setting down her tray, but her thoughts stayed on Christian. Maybe it was foolish, but she was curious. Curious about him, his past, the man behind the bouncer who rarely spoke more than a grunt in her direction.

Hwasa slid up beside her, balancing a tray of full drinks. Her lips curved into a sly grin as she followed Y/n’s gaze. “You’re staring,” she teased, her voice barely audible over the music.

Y/n snapped her head back, her cheeks flushing with heat. “I’m not staring.”

Hwasa raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Sure, you’re not.”

Rolling her eyes, Y/n tried to brush off Hwasa’s knowing look. “I’m just… observant,” she mumbled, reaching for a rag to wipe down the bar.

Hwasa’s grin widened. “Uh-huh. And Christian just happens to be in your line of sight?”

Y/n busied herself, avoiding her gaze. “He’s the head bouncer. It’s his job to watch the crowd too.”

“Right,” Hwasa drawled, unconvinced. She leaned in closer, lowering her voice. “You know, I heard he’s single. And he’s been asking about you.”

Y/n’s heart skipped a beat, but she forced herself to remain nonchalant. “Probably just making sure I’m not causing trouble.”

Hwasa laughed, a tinkling sound that somehow cut through the pulsing bass.

As the night wore on, the familiar routine of balancing trays and dodging drunken patrons kept Y/n’s hands busy, but her mind remained distracted. Christian was stationed near the entrance, his eyes scanning the crowd. Every time she passed, she felt his eyes on her.

Later, as the crowd began to thin, Y/n leaned against the bar next to Hwasa. “Long night?” Hwasa asked, not bothering to look up from the gin and tonic she was pouring.

Y/n sighed, her eyes drifting to where Christian now stood, talking to Dabin, another bouncer. “Yeah, you could say that.”

Hwasa smirked. “You know, you’re not exactly subtle, staring at Christian like that.”

“I am not,” Y/n protested, though her cheeks warmed under Hwasa’s gaze.

“Girl, please,” Hwasa chuckled. “It’s fine. Everyone stares at Christian. But good luck with that.”

Before Y/n could ask what she meant, Yuto appeared beside her. “Malibu, can you grab some stock from the back?”

She nodded, eager for a distraction. As Y/n headed toward the stockroom, her thoughts still lingered on Christian. She grabbed the bottles quickly, eager to get back to the floor. As she made her way down the dimly lit hallway, she felt a presence behind her. Turning, she found herself face to face with Christian.

For a split second, it felt like the world around her stilled. The distant hum of the club faded as she locked eyes with him.

“You good?” His voice was low, but it was enough to send a shiver down her spine.

Y/n nodded, suddenly feeling self-conscious. There was a pause, and for a moment, she wondered if he would say more. But Christian just nodded, his expression unreadable, as he walked past her, heading back toward the entrance.

She stared after him, her heart pounding in her ears. What was it about him that made her feel this way? He was just a guy—a ridiculously attractive one with a mysterious past—but still just a guy.

Shaking off the lingering thoughts, Y/n finished her shift, trying to focus on the familiar routine. By the time she left, the cool night air hit her skin like a relief. She walked to her car, keys in hand, but her thoughts were elsewhere.

She couldn’t help but wonder—who was Christian Yu, really? And why couldn’t she stop thinking about him?

previous | masterlist | next summary: you once lived a privileged life, until a family scandal sent it crumbling down. now, working as a cocktail waitress at Club Venus. you're drawn to christian yu, the head bouncer. you suddenly enter a world of fight clubs, friendship, lingering relationships, and dark past.

[aria-ashryver]

okay, I am going to NEED y'all to go watch this music video. To me, this has always been CAS -- screaming in the rain, so deep into a mental breakdown that he's cycled right back around to helpless, bitter laughter.

This MV is just that end scene come to life 🖤

(Warning for strobing lights -- there is a lightning theme throughout)

For more context: Christian Yu, the artist who wrote, performed, starred in, and directed this song and MV, has bipolar disorder. MITO, the person depicted here, is a personification of Christian's extreme lows

[yoonia]

schedules & progress ● 2023

© Yoonia, 2016-2023. All rights reserved — Unauthorized use and/or duplication of these works, including reposting, translating and modification in any form, is strictly prohibited.

⇝— Updated: Dec 30th, 2023

⇝— 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬 ⇝— 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟏 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 ⇝— 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟐 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 ⇝— 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬

⇝— 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬

✎ 2023 Blog Insight & Sneak Peek: WIP teasers and summaries

✎ 2022 Writing Recap

✎ June - July 2023 Writing Process

✎ August 2023 Writing Process

⇝— 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

✎ What You Wanted (M) | Kim Hanbin/B.I x reader | First Time Sex, Virgin!reader, Boyfriend!Hanbin, Smut, PWP - Posted: Jan 21st, 2023

✎ Eternal Sunshine (M) | Hoseok x reader | Past Lovers!AU, New Beginning, inspired by Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Minds (yes, the movie), Epilogue for Spotless Minds - Posted: Apr 2nd, 2023

✎ Mirrors: what becomes of us (M) | Jungkook x reader | FWB to lovers!au, pwp, smut, angst - Posted: Sep 7th, 2023

✎ The (im)Perfect Ending (M) | Namjoon x reader | Past Lovers!au, Second Chances!au, Infidelity, smut, angst - Posted: Oct 12th, 2023

✎ Overdrive (M) | Kim Hanbin/B.I x reader | Musician/Artist!B.I, Manager!reader, Smut - Posted: Nov 10th, 2023

⇝— 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬

✎ Spotless Minds: visual concept & series masterlist | Hoseok x reader | Past Lovers!AU, Mature theme - Posted: Apr 5th, 2022

✎ Chance Encounter | Christian Yu x reader | TA!au, College!au - latest update: chapter 6 | posted: Aug 12th, 2023

✎ In Motion | Jungkook x reader | Masturbation Club!au, Smut, Mature theme - latest update: In Motion — epilogue | posted: Aug 18th, 2023

✎ Mirrors: story guide | Jungkook x reader | FWB!au, smut, angst | posted: Sept 7th, 2023

✎ Bedroom Hymns | Yoongi x reader | Fairytale retelling, Fairy King!Yoongi, Princess!reader - latest update: chapter xi. wanderers-2 | posted: Dec 18th, 2023

⇝— 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

✎ Free Falling (M) | Jimin x reader | Established relationship!au, Smut, part of Falling trilogy - Posted: Feb 25th, 2023

✎ Come Undone (M) | Yoongi x reader | Established relationship!au, Smut - Posted: Oct 29th, 2023

⇝— 𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐬

✎ G.H.O.S.T: The Hacker’s Tale — Carousel side story | Hoseok x reader | Hacker!Hoseok, assassin!reader, Suspense Thriller

✎ Alpha’s Inferno | Namjoon x OC | Supernatural!au, Werewolf!Namjoon, Vampire!reader, Angst, Fluff, part of Shifters Series

✎ Flux: Blindsided | Jungkook x reader x Yoongi | Established relationship!au, Smut, polyamory!au

✎ A Christmas Fix | Taehyung x reader | Secret Baby!au, Second Chance!au, Strangers to Lovers!au | Part of the Jingle All the Way collaboration

✎ Nefarious: In Motion - A spin off | Jimin x reader | Sex club!au, Smut

⇝— 𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐨𝐧 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞: Nov 6th, 2023

➛ 𝚂𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚕 𝙲𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚗𝚝:    ↪ Monthly Writing Journal    ↪ Writing Class 101 with Dia    ↪ Original Story: Honey Skies | Prologue; Chapter 1-12    ↪ Never Falling (M) - Uncut Version    ↪ We Are All Dreamers (M) - Special Edition: Male version    ↪ Game On! (M) - Unpublished WIP (rough draft) | Jungkook x reader     ↪ Under The Willow Tree - Blood Moon Rising hidden explicit scene #001

➛ 𝙸𝚗𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝙱𝚘𝚊𝚛𝚍 & 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜:    ↪ Carousel; character chart & family tree (updated version - posted Nov 6th, 2023)    ↪ Carousel; Inspiration Board    ↪ Shifters Series; Inspiration Board    ↪ The Dragon King: Blood Moon Rising side story - excerpt & moodboard    ↪ Cinnamon Bliss; Inspiration Board    ↪ About Time; Inspiration Board    ↪ Shifters Series; World Map & Legends     ↪ Shifters Series; A Complete Guide to Original Characters and Pairings    ↪ Chance Encounter - Visual concept & Playlist    ↪ The Bedroom Hymns; Inspiration Board       ↪ White Lies; Story timeline

➛ 𝙵𝚒𝚌 𝚃𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚜:    ↪ Only Us | Jungkook x reader x Jungkook | Mafia!Jungkook, FBI Agent!reader, Twin!Jungkook  ↪ G.H.O.S.T: The Hacker’s Tale — Carousel Side Story | Hoseok x reader | Hacker!Hoseok, assassin!reader    ↪ Take It Slow (previously titled Virgin Mary) | DEAN x reader | Bartender!Dean, Writer!reader  ↪ Flux: Blindsided | Yoongi x reader x Jungkook | Polyamorous!au, Smut, part of Flux Series  ↪ The Whispers in The Mist | Yoongi x reader | Sacrilege!au, part of Sacrilege collab  ↪ Hunting Season | Hoseok x reader | part of Shifters Series  ↪ About Time | Jungkook x reader / Jimin x reader: excerpt and teaser for final chapters

¸¸.·¯⍣✩ 𝔤𝔬 𝔱𝔬 𝖓𝖆𝖛𝖎𝖌𝖆𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓 𝖕𝖆𝖌𝖊 ¸¸.·¯⍣✩

[takeshitakyuuto]

Trigun Book Club update volume 2/3/who knows

One more week until Trigun Maximum! Then my volume numbers won’t be off :’)

I feel like every time I sat down to read this time around, I got interrupted. Anyways, this is a long one, so buckle up

Ch 13. get his ass cobbler-san

Yaaaaaay ice cream on Vash! Me too me too!

Quite the introduction for Mr. Collarbones

I’m sorry that it’s just kinda funny to me whenever characters call Vash by his full name. That’s Mr. ヴァッシュ・ザ・スタンピード to you

Knives! Your reputation precedes you

I love when Vash puts on his shooting glasses and immediately my spotify switches to FFXIV battle music

Okay so maybe I kinda spoiled myself probably not really, since the beginning I’ve had the question (that the reader is obviously supposed to have) of why does Vash have such a big bounty on his head, but I saw someone say that he’s the Jesus character of Trigun and like. okay question answered I know enough about Christianity to fill in the blanks here, anyways with that it mind it’s really interesting to see how Vash mentions that his goal is to send Knives to hell

This guy kinda reminds me of that guy from Yu Gi Oh. Kaiba? Yeah Kaiba

12 pieces of coin, twelve assassins, twelve disciples. im making big brain connections here (joking)

There’s a ...head in that bag? [insert “so no head” gif]

Ch 13.5 [I think this is an extra chapter] i like the little background we’re getting on Vash and the visuals with him standing over the mass amounts of crosses like a graveyard is really cool

Alright cut it out Nightow we don’t need to get weird here

Even though I rarely read manga digitally anymore, I feel so spoiled with how much manga is published online nowadays. These very obvious scans of paper volumes is so much harder to read, I’m sounding out like half the words I read

You know that chapter of Kino’s Journey (okay I know you don’t bear with me here) where Kino goes to that country where everyone is obsessed with this one guy’s painting of tanks and they’re all like “it says so much about war and society” and then Kino meets the painter and he’s all like “nah I just think tanks are really cool”. Yeah that painter is Nightow

Which is more elegant, this girl’s dress of Vash’s coat tails?

Has Vash always worn an earring? Have I just never noticed? I see but don’t look? How coquette

The interspersed English that Nightow uses always adds a bit of humor. I’m not even a translator but sometimes I think about what I would do with those bits. Would I keep it to make extra work? Would I translate it into a different language that’s more commonly understood than Japanese but not English (such as Spanish)? Translations are weird man....

Vash has the best pouting face of all time

Okay sorry I said a lot in that chapter but I don’t think any of it was serious. Not that that was a very important chapter anyways, other than the bits of world building we got at the very beginning

Volume three! Ch 14. Omg I see that big cross in the cover. Do we get to meet Nicholas Wolfwood himself? God I hope I’m right and he’s the one with the cross because I’m blasting this post for the Trigun Scholars to see. Blease be kind I know so little

Seems like this volume or at least this chapter is going to be a lot of Vash vs Kaiba

So we’re seeing Rem’s death scene and how it displays her love for humanity, sacrificing herself to save some, even if she can’t save everyone. And seeing that Knives has been a bit fucked from the beginning huh. And why Vash hates him so much (cue Losing My Religion by REM playing in the back)

Vash is typically painted as an angelic type of character (thinking back to chapter nine[?] with the angel/plant they met on the sand steam) so having him depicted more as a devil character is really interesting. They even called this his true nature, although that could just be this villain character giving him shit. I’m excited to see how Vash’s character is fleshed out in future volumes and how these seemingly two sides of him create a whole

Ch 15. I don’t know (yet?) if Knives’ plan was to kill Rem along with a bunch of humans but damn. backfiredddd

So this spirit/angel urging Vash not to kill must be Rem right? Since he said that if he kills here, she’ll be gone for real? I’m taking this to be more of Vash’s memory of her and not a literal angel or spirit

Ch 16. I was totally about to rag on them for having all this insane technology and Meryl still having to use a typewriter but then I remembered that this series is from what. the 80s? Earlier? Honestly who could’ve imagined the technology we’d have in just twenty years from then, it’s insane.

Oh that’s cool! Vash is called “Humanoid Typhoon” right? It’s usually written as 「人間台風」which literally translates to human typhoon but at the beginning of this chapter, Meryl calls him 「人間災害」with furigana instructing the reader to read it as “humanoid typhoon” (same as with the other times), however this translates to “human disaster” rather than typhoon

One coin part down, eleven to go...

We’ve finally officially established that Vash has a prosthetic arm, I was wondering when that was gonna happen

First of all what is Vash carrying with him second of all holy shit that panel of the person(?) nailed on the cross

That thing was set up specifically for him? Is this another one of the twelve assassins? I feel like I’m gonna get bored of this set up real quick if it continues on like this

oh man I’m struggling with the blurriness of this volume, I keep messing up さ and き in the furigana and if anything’s got a dakuten I’m a gonner

Ch 17. I bet these poor citizens see someone in an over the top ridiculous outfit and just think to themselves, aw man this bitch is about to blow up the city again. Good thing I renewed my insurance last month

Yaoi proportions are back!

Having the guy who’s pissing you off rip out his own still-beating heart with his own bare hands is pretty badass ngl

Is Kaiba (okay I know his name is Legato but this is funnier) trying to bring about the apocalypse or something? Or rather eradicate enough humans to be able to live peacefully, whether that means all humans or just the ones he considers “evil”? Right now he’s giving me a lot of Light Yagami vibes

Ch 18. Cross guyyyyyy hell yeah. You know, maybe you wouldn’t collapse in the street if you didn’t carry a big ass cross with you everywhere. Just food for thought

Wolfwood speaks in Kansaiben???? Help I’m falling in love it’s my one weakness in this world

I’ve decided that I never want to see Wolfwood written in katakana ever again.

Wolfwood just needs to say あかん and ホンマ and I’m already head over heels

I really like Wolfwood and I promise it’s more than just the Kansaiben! I love how nice he is and he seems to be able to read people pretty well and also he’s kind of a dork. But the Kansaiben helps too

Ch 19. Omg the one guy who I was immediately like 🫵 yaoi proportions ended up being Hornfreak. Yep that’s just how it is

Isn’t it so fun when words you learned from anime pop up elsewhere? There’s “human trafficking,” which I learned from Yona of the Dawn

Oh? It’s Dominique not Dominic? That explains the かしら. Honestly I do like Nightow’s style of “I can’t tell what gender this person is”

Nightow also really likes drawing Vash ass up this is not the time for a dirty joke

Oh my god hes going super sayan also oh my god im so stupid i just closed out of my trigun tab trying to switch jfc

Ch 20. The cat stepped on my laptop and flipped all the images omfg I am having such a time trying to read today oh my god I can’t get it back I guess I’ll just restart my laptop for now? holy shit

Yeah okay closing out of the site didn’t help, restarting my laptop didn’t help, all files were flipped, but luckily someone suggested clearing the cookies for that site and it actually worked. I am so bad with technology. What a ridiculous day.

I’m gonna be honest I don’t know how you all can read this in English, I could only figure out who was speaking based on the fact that Legato used だ where Wolfwood would’ve used や

Lol jump for your coin bitch (Vash I love you but it’s funny I’m sorry)

Wolfwood’s 「ちう」is causing me so much stress. What the hell does that mean, boy. Luckily I have friends in high places (Japan)

I’m so obsessed with the fucked up angel imagery here in Knives’ rebirth

Please no romance between Meryl and Vash please no romance between Meryl and Vash please no r

Guy who only reads shoujo manga: I’m getting a lot of shoujo manga vibes from this (no but really, there’s a bunch of artistic choices in Trigun that I mostly associate with shoujo manga, but I think it has more to do with the age of the manga. Probably Ikeda Riyoko’s influence)

Knives is such an overdramatic bitch, I love that

Angel Vash! The inherent danger of the divine! Although a god can be kind it can also be cruel! Power can be used in many ways and thus is its danger!

We’ve finally established that Vash and this power that Knives brings out of him is the reason why July Town was destroyed. This is probably also the reason why he’s got such a high price on his head

Also really enjoying the implications that these human forms aren’t Vash’s and Knives’ “true” bodies

Extra chapter. Thank god he didn’t shoot the egg oh my god. The irony of consistently taking the lord’s name in vain so much here (term used ironically but also because what else can I say) while reading Nightow’s bible fanfiction just now hit me

I admit it, I totally skimmed that. In my defense, it’s past midnight.

Final thoughts: Having officially finished up the original trilogy, that was pretty damn good! The ending was great (yes, I know there’s much more to go) and quite bittersweet. The pace really picked up for me in this last volume. My only main issue was just friction between me and the genre, which is no one’s fault but my own. I could definitely do for less action scenes, but again, my favorite genre is the “nothing happens” genre. I’m really excited to see where Trigun Maximum takes the series, especially in the ways that these angels/plants are developed. I’m also excited to see more of Knives and Wolfwood and especially how they both interact with Vash, since they obviously have extremely different perceptions of him. I’m not quite sure where the plot is going to go from here, since it seems like Vash took Knives along with him in his disappearance, but I’ll follow Nightow wherever he leads us in this series. What I’m not looking forward to is having to read more of Nightow’s handwriting. God. Even so, somehow it’s still not the worst I’ve seen from mangaka. Oh, also, there was significantly less of that black cat than I expected. I’ll just assume it comes back in Maximum. And (sorry these thoughts are so unordered) wow the art was so stunning, especially there at the end, that I definitely have half a mind to pick up the physicals for my personal collection. Especially with a fanbase revival due to Trigun Stampede, I’d be more shocked if it’s out of print than if it isn’t. Oh and one more thing, we went through three of the twelve coin assassins. Does that mean that we’re going to go through the other nine in Maximum? Also, I’m not quite clear on why Vash has to collect the coin fragments like this is Dragon Ball (disclaimer: never seen or read any of the dragon ball franchise). Was mystical object collection just a trend back then? What’s going to happen, or supposed to, when Vash gets them all? Hopefully this will become clear as the series continues.

[chiwhorei]

Anime Fandoms and Their Corresponding Denomination

Every Christian is just a fandom rat like the rest of us.

This was too fucking funny I need everyone to see it. My husband and I are stuck in the car and matched Christian denominations to their Anime fandoms. Because that’s what religion is anyway, right?

Let’s start with the big ones:

Dragon Ball - Catholics

they think they’re the OGs, the fandom gatekeepers, polarizing and unwelcoming to anyone not already born into their fandom

One Piece - Protestants

the defectors, they’re convinced they’re the real true fandom. Moral superiority because they’re marginally better than their predecessors

Naruto - Pentecostals

Loud. Constantly trying to convince the other denominations that they’re one of the Big 3. They’ve got plenty of content but they’re too cringe and unwilling to acknowledge they haven’t paid they’re dues yet.

Some more specific denominations:

Yu-Gi-Oh - Evangelicals

Younger guy on the scene, constantly changing and repackaging their tropes but never saying anything new.

Fairytale - Lutherans

They’ve not done anything to me personally, but there’s something not right with this congregation. Some of them are chill but they’ve got a silent majority of weirdos that take things way too seriously

Pokémon - Baptists

More accesible bar to entry but you will get a harsh slap of reality when you notice how toxic the fanboys get.

Neon Genesis Evangelion - Orthodoxies

The quiet OGs, too cool to let new fans in. Even if you try, you don’t get it and you’ll never truly be in the know.

My Hero Academia - Hillsong, Mega-Churchers

They got a taste of mainstream acceptance and capitalized off of it. All the cool kids go to baby’s-first-church and get their nut being part of the pretty, shiny Christianity. Peel off the first layer and they are gatekeeping as bad as the OGs.

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures - Methodists

Hello LGBT’s. They’ve always been here, no one’s got beef with this fandom. You can sit with us energy.

And since I’ve already gotcha:

Cowboy Bebop - Quakers

Leave them be, they’re just enjoying their thing. They’re not bringing any dogs to this fight.

Avatar the Last Airbender - Mormons

The singularly American denomination. No one else really acknowledges them, even though they want to be part of the fandom space so bad. Don’t realize you can’t have your cake (mainstream and safe backed by Nickelodeon) and eat it too (accepted in the anime fandom at large, even if they have quiet, individual support)

Code Lyoko - Scientologists

You don’t even go here. You had some cool ideas and wild lore but you are literally not allowed to sit with the other fandoms

Sword Art Online - Heaven’s Gate Cult

I don’t think I need to explain this one. IYKYK

🙏🏼 peace be with you 🙏🏼

[enquiringangel]

Ooh, could I get a DVD commentary on Sacrilege?

You most certainly can!

From this meme here. The fic in question is here.

Sacrilege

The idea for this one was born from the single image of David and Michael doing the nasty in a church. This in turn was, at least subliminally, inspired by a scene in the Yu-Gi-Oh! anime where Ryou Bakura is trying to escape from the evil spirit that frequently possesses him by running into a church. In that scene the church utterly fails to offer him protection just as it does here.

The last time Michael had set foot in a church was for his grandmother’s funeral years before. He’d been eleven. 

This is based on a throwaway line by Lucy where she says her mom died eight years ago. As Michael is meant to be going into his senior year after the events of the summer, he's eighteen. Also from dialogue in deleted scenes trips to visit Santa Carla may have happened while he was a kid, but the Emerson kids and Grandpa are very much strangers to one another.

Michael is by his own admission not even a religious person and neither am I, though faith as a topic fascinates me. There are a few pieces of imagery I put in like Michael turning away from the cross and the 'sad-faced saint' that are meant to reflect this and the futility of the whole endeavour.

David's shadow covering up the altar was maybe a little heavy-handed of me, but the devil in folklore (who is not quite the same figure as Satan) is usually depicted as the Man in Black. In Robert Eggers' movie The Witch, he also appears wearing spurs, so the detail of David's spurs jangling was one I had to include.

His mouth was curled in a faint smirk—Caught you, again those lips seemed to say—but the look in his eyes was one of bitter disappointment.  

David wants Michael, but it's not enough to have him. He wants Michael to want to be there, of his own volition (because the devil doesn't just take souls, you have to surrender them to him) which in this AU where I imply the vampires won and killed his family, is not something that is likely to happen. They are, as my tags warn, in a deeply dysfunctional relationship.

“You know,” David began conversationally as he plucked a cigarette from behind his ear and lit it. “My folks were Catholic. Went to mass every Sunday, confessed away their many sins. Never did either of them a blind bit of good. Or me.[...]"

This is venturing into entirely made-up headcanon backstory stuff. I pictured that David's grandparents were Irish immigrants fleeing the Potato Famine by coming to America. You will note that while he says his parents were Catholic, he doesn't consider himself to have been so. This is also for backstory reasons that David was largely on his own from a young age and was too focused on surviving to bother about going to church. (Unless it was to steal money from the collection plate.)

The discussion about the church's ineffectiveness at keeping vampires out is a bit of worldbuilding based on a few things. My assumption is that it is the power of faith that gives holy items their sting, rather than Christianity having some special claim to vanquishing evil. But also on a vaguely remembered piece of apocrypha to the effect of 'no building of wood or stone' being necessary to house god because god is everywhere (I cannot for the life of me remember where this comes from and google is failing me). But it's also inspired by the demon BlueFangs in Netflix's Castlevania adaptation, who taunts the corrupt bishop by saying: "God is not here. This is an empty box." (cw: gore)

My cw against misrepresentation of religion is for the discussion of Wicca, where David and Michael assume all Wiccans are women and that they always practice their religion naked. Neither is true, but they are (mentally at least) teenage boys content to indulge in the fiction of conventionally attractive white ladies dancing around ritual bonfires in the nude. Plus it's the 80s and Wicca is an 'alternative religion' and not something most people are likely to be well-informed about unless they have either researched it or dabbled.

The lead up to their coupling is violent with Michael actually maiming David by tearing a lump out of his throat, because I feel like this is how vampires roll, especially if they can heal very quickly. I don't subscribe to the trope that vampire bites feel pleasant per se, at least not to humans. It's more a case of "Hmm, how kinky are you".

Which in Michael's case here, is very.

And of course the closing image is David mocking the very idea of a god who could keep him from Michael.

[jurakan]

Uh... you reblogged a tarot card artwork recently. Since you're a Christian, I thought I'd warn you that tarot cards are occultist and very dangerous and it's better not to have any contact with them...

Don't take it the wrong way... I just think it's best to warn.

I understand your warning, but here's my take:

For the record, tarot cards were originally (and still are in parts of the world, like Italy) a playing card. That's all they're meant to be, and when I share tarot art on Tumblr, it's because I think the art looks cool and I ascribe no further meaning to them.

Yes, there are people who use tarot cards to try to read the future. This always struck me as incredibly stupid because, as I said, they're meant to be playing cards. It's like if someone tried to read special knowledge from Yu-Gi-Oh cards. It started in the Anglophone world because some occultist decided that it must have secrets of the ancient Egyptian world or something??

In short--I like the art I see on Tumblr sometimes, but I don't own tarot cards, and I think card readings are incredibly stupid (I will concede I like that one scene in JS&MN though) because they're supposed to be playing cards. And I'm happy to appreciate cool fantasy art when I see it.

[Gosh, I'm also getting flashbacks to when I tried the first episode of Da Vinci's Demons, a show a bunch of critics said was so clever and well-made, had one of the side characters claim he invented tarot cards as a way to tell the future. It was one of many things that pushed me to realize this show was really stupid. That, and Leonardo building a robot bird that actually flew.]

[dprjjang]

DPRIAN Don't Go Insane Behind the Scene

[animechristi]

Teenage Mercenary: Humility

Luke 1:48 “Because he hath regarded the humility of his handmaid; for behold from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed.”

Disclaimers

Teenage Mercenary as of June 2023 is an incomplete Webtoon so I can’t comment on the series as a whole.

Big surprise a series about mercenaries will contain violence and cursing and there are advisories for each chapter. Webtoon itself puts a warning up but there’s no hard lock out to my knowledge so do with that what you will.

Boilerplate a.k.a. “The Premise”

Our main character “Ijin Yu” was raised with mercenaries and has recently quit to finish high school and meet the little family he has left. Unfortunately for those Ijin runs into, you can’t take the fight out of the kid. While protecting his friends and sister, he is slowly drawn into the messy life of Korean corporate manage while he’s fine with keeping a simple bodyguard job to support his family.

Our main theme: Humility

Ijin is a man of few words. This of course gives him the silent but deadly fighter trope. But more surprising is that when he is complimented or offered extra compensation, he turns it down saying he was only doing his job. Here we see that Ijin practices the virtue of humility.To clarify, humility is the proper estimation of our own skills and on a fundamental level a proper knowledge of who we are (cf. the Catholic Encyclopedia). For Christians this means acknowledging our worth before God our Father. We are completely dependent on Him for everything (1 Cor 4:7). We are incapable of praying without His help, but because by Baptism we have become His sons we now are capable because of the Holy Spirit in us (Gal 4:6).

Our Specific Scene:

Very minor spoilers: At one point, after a successful rescue mission Ijin is given the classic “we couldn’t have done it without you.” His response is that he couldn’t have done it without the others on the mission as neither of them could have done it alone. He praises the work of his partner and shuts down any further discussion with a great line: “The goal is to secure the safety of the VIP, not to figure out who made the greatest contribution.”  This is a great example of how humility helps us avoid the self-glorification of pride.

Ijin's friend is surprised to find him praising his teammates

Okay, so what’s the point?

I’m getting there, but first:

In recent years, June has been dubbed “Pride month,” so that under the guise of community support, individuals defend misguided love and promote a morality based on only on emotions. For Catholics, June is a month to celebrate the Sacred Heart of Jesus, a heart which loves more than we ever could, a heart which has experienced the same emotions we have, a heart which always shared those emotions and struggles with His Father, a heart which drew the power to carry on from His constant conversation with His Father.

Here’s the point:

Humility, a.k.a. the first beatitude “poor in spirit,” is the foundation of the Christian life. Our goal isn’t to see who is holiest, our goal is to see God, to get to heaven. I am not saying “don’t aspire to greatness.” We are all called to and made for greatness. But our greatness comes from looking at Jesus and imitating Him, not from looking at others and trying to be better than them.

Remember: Humility isn’t beating ourselves up. Our protagonist Ijin knew his abilities, but knew his limits and his need for help.

Perhaps the best imitator of Jesus was Mary His mother. She humbled herself knowing exactly who she was and just how much God had done for her. It was this humility that won her the privilege to have all generations call her blessed.

Mary and Elizabeth don’t compete for whose child will be greater, rather they both rejoice in how good God is to His people.

To close I leave you with the Litany of Humility. It’s a prayer I struggled with at first but have grown to love.

LITANY OF HUMILITY

O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, Hear me!

From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, O Jesus.

From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, O Jesus.

That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be praised and I go unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

Amen.

[faustocosgrove]

i’m gonna be honest with y’all. the original intention i had of banking the reviews i made all year was to be all grinch like and declare how much i hate christmas each day. but since the occupation decided to bomb fucking bethlehem on the first day of christmas that feels too poor of taste a thing to do. but i’m not waiting for next year to do this because i don’t want the obligation to be on tumblr for a whole ‘nother year hanging over my head. so y’all will have to make do with my dumb reviews without me bitching and moaning throughout the 12 days of christmas about how much i hate christmas and consumerism and christianity in general and christmas music and christmas cookies and that one gif that always goes around tumblr of a kitten whose tail has been turned into a christmas tree. and on that note:

and on the fourth day of reviewmas I, Fausto, give to thee:

4 scantily clad teenaged girls (fbi open up! meme)

the 3rd time i read the same book about lawns maybe?

2 high school animes

and a ninja book

…from a guy who still thinks about the naruto series in the year 2023

Today’s feature is none other than 1993’s Dragon Half, a two episode OVA that is as skanky as it is hilarious. It’s sad that it’s only 2 episodes long since it’s funny as hell but it makes up for it by being so jammed packed full of jokes that you have to pause it to laugh so you don’t miss the next gag. It’s also so jammed packed with jokes that’s it’s honestly exhausting, so it still feels like binging a 26 episode series by the end of it.

The main conflict in the show is that main character Mink, the half dragon half human for whom the title refers to, is obsessed with Dick Saucer, a teenaged heartthrob/singer/celebrity/dragon slayer. Now you’d think that she could have reasonably picked any other teenaged celebrity to obsess over, except all her friends are also obsessed with Dick Saucer so clearly he is just that cool and her dad (the human parent) is a retired dragon slayer, so the whole dragon slayer wanting to kill dragons thing isn’t that much of an issue. For her anyway.

The first episode is mainly exposition for who all the characters are and how they relate to each other, but it also kind feels like watching a forbidden episode of the Kirby anime where Kirby, the King’s assistant snail thing, and metaknight have all been transformed into teenagers with metaknight being the only boy. it’s a bunch of wacky characters doing wacky things in a dungeons and dragons medieval fantasy backdrop.

the second episode is like the dark tournament arc from yu yu hakusho but jokes.

mink shows an impressive amount of skin, as does her best friend (can’t remember her name. the blonde one.) (and the villain teen girl) (and the villain teen girl’s dead mom in a flashback) but the younger girl character does not! it’s honestly sad that this is so noteworthy but the loli character is covered head to toe and the one instance of another character being a bit of a skeeze toward her is met with an angry bear. the series even draws attention to it during the swimming scene. the little girl does not wear a swim suit. so mink might have madonna style boob cones that bounce all over the place but the elementary school girl is a line too far for the creators of this show and i respect that. that’s a line that anime crosses way too often i mean even fucking naruto cannonically shows sakura thinking about sasuke’s penis when the two of them are 12. plus konohamaru doing the sexy no jutsu when he’s like 8. naruto sexualizes pre teen children more than the skanky OVA one where three teenaged girls run around in their 1980s jazzercise leotards that let the whole leg hang out in a way that it might as well be panties. like holy hell japan. anyway. mink does flash the audience in the finale so do yourself a favor and just don’t watch the last few minutes.

also the ending song is fun.

also! even thought there’s a lot of scantily clad teenaged girls i didn’t get the feeling that the writers wanted the audience to be fapping to them. maybe it’s just a sign of the times thing and it was sexy back then, but the show changes art style from sexy teenaged girl to SD rolling on the ground so much that if the characters were supposed to be fap material then the delivery was a complete bust.

[lafeae]

L K and Q for the ask meme!

L: what’s the weirdest AU you’ve come up with?

Somehow I feel like we could be here all day with this one. If there’s an AU, I’ve probably thought of it at least once, unless it was crossover, and even then, I did a very strange crossover waaaaaay back when.

There’s actually a toss-up: one is a Yu-Gi-Oh crossover I did with House M.D.

Plot: Kaiba is a wealthy benefactor to Princeton-Plainsboro hospital because House was able to diagnose Mokuba with an ataxia syndrome. While he’s there, he has a seizure and the team has to find out what’s wrong with him. I don’t recall what sort of disease he had, but at one point they thought it was Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease, what is commonly called Mad-Cow Disease. It wasn’t that, that was the ‘scary’ diagnosis before they found out the real reason. Unfortunately, I don’t know what the real disease was.

This story is a beautiful combination of my nerdy fandoms, and if I was actually a doctor, I might have been able to write it convincingly.

Second: An Inuyasha stockcar/NASCAR AU

Plot: Sesshomaru is a driver who gets into a really bad accident on the track and ends up paralysed (I think?) and the power of love and hope from Rin helps him heal, and also there’s a big battle on the racetrack with Naraku at the end because there’s also magic still in this world, but I don’t remember anything other than what I told you. I was 13/14. It was not good.

K: Whats the angstiest plot you’ve come up with?

One that wasn’t shared and I exclusively kept in a notebook when I was a moody teenager ~16.

Kaiba is also an edgy teenager, he’s dealing with his literal internal self still talking to him. It was a very amateur look at depression and how e vis ourselves that more or less climaxed with him having a chess match with himself, and every wrong move he made, a corrosive goo was eating? him, threatening to let the “bad” version takeover. I think now I might be able to manage the plot about like….self-consuming depression and how it reflects on the outside better, but really it was an edg-y version of depression, self-hate, suicidal overtones with no actual plot other than suffering. Nothing like…tying it up.

It did spawn a poem I still remember:

Mirror, mirror

On the wall

Don’t you care about me at all?

Why do you show me this horrid scene?

Why do you show me this horrid thing?

You love to give the thing I despise

And yet offer nothing to idolize

I rip you apart,

Into cracks

In hopes you go away

Mirror, mirror

I will look at you one day

And I will say:

I think I like you better that way

Because when you’re shattered, you don’t mock me

And you don’t make me feel ashamed

(There’s another stanza, about getting better and loving yourself, but I actually don’t remember it. This is the best recollection I have of a poem/drawing that I ripped up a loooooong ago).

But yes, all the angst. All the edge.

Q: Any discarded plot lines/scenes/stories?

I had a whole ass story idea with three different chapters or so, set in Edo Perios Japan, wherein that Jounouchi is possibly a supernatural entity of some sort, but he’s thrown into a daimyo’s castle jail because he’s an unwanted foreigner possibly spreading Christianity which was very…unwanted at the time. They also barely let in any foreigners besides the Dutch.

The truth of the plot was that he knew a Hyakki Yagyō—a ghost parade in Japanese folklore—was due to pass through the town with the castle. He was something like a witch who could sense these things, perhaps even a half-demon (hadn’t decided), but his rambling just came off as crazy. So eventually, he was going to get just Kaiba and Mokuba out of the castle before it caught fire, mostly because he can convince the brothers and become a little enamoured with Kaiba, but also because Kaiba and Mokuba are under rather brutal conditions from Gozaburo, the daimyo of the castle, who pretty much would feed his sons to the wolves for a shred of power from the shogun.

So yeah.

Here’s what I did get done: The Jailhouse Fire

Thank you for the asks!

[richrubies]

Late and Lori (Christian Yu x Reader)

 ➳ genre: life and love

➳ masterlist

It was late when Christian walked through the door.

Exhausted, he removed his shoes and dropped his bags as quietly as possible.

He knew you would have fallen asleep by now, even after trying your best to fight against your tired eyes, wanting to make sure that he got home safely. That thought alone made him smile despite his body’s protest in doing anything it didn’t have to. Today had been a long day and he was both physically and mentally drained.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Stifling a yawn, Christian moved further into the apartment. He didn’t need the lights to know where he was going — he’d been staying at your apartment for over a week now and had gotten used to the odd curves and bends when it came to maneuvering in the dark.

Running a hand over his face, he opened the fridge and immediately began to glow blue thanks to the bulb that lit both he and the kitchen walls. Pulling out a bottle of water and the leftovers you’d labelled for him to warm in the microwave, he set the timer and let it heat up, leaning against the bench as he waited, ignoring the gurgle of his empty stomach.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Living in your apartment this last week had become a natural part of his routine, so natural that he didn’t know how he’d handle having to go back to his own place once things at the studio finally settled down.

He’d been staying with you out of convenience. A three minute walk in comparison to his usual thirty minute drive to HQ had made life a lot easier when it came to his busy schedule. Despite that, even he had to admit that though being here with you was great, he missed the small things of being at his own place, things he’d never given much thought before like Dabin’s constant humming and the patter of paws on the floor.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

It didn’t take long for him to finish his meal, practically inhaling the lasagna as soon as it had finished warming up, and clearing the bench of any mess within minutes, in a hurry to shower and sleep, knowing tomorrow would be another hard day in the studio.

Taking soft steps towards the bedroom, he opened the slightly ajar door and closed it behind him. The soft glow of the mood lamp lit the room up enough for him to see you sound asleep, curled in a ball under the duvet, surrounded by a mountain of pillows.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

He was lucky — he knew he was. There was so much about him that you were willing to accept and endure. The late nights, the erratic hours he worked, the moods he got into when something wasn’t quite right. He couldn’t believe it had already been a year with you.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Now standing over you, Christian bent and kissed your cheek lightly, ‘잘자, 자기야,’

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

You didn’t stir, yet movement from under the blanket had him watching curiously before his eyes widened as a familiar pair of ears popped out from under the blanket, perked at the sound of his voice.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

‘Lori?’ He whispered in surprise while the dog wagged its tail. Attached to her collar was a little gift-tag that he read as he snuggled his dog in his arms.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

I know you’ve probably missed her since being here with me so I thought she could come stay too.

P.S. Don’t let the front-desk see her when you take her out. The complex has a strict no-animal policy and I had to hide her in a bag to get her in. She’s a stowaway.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

The gesture had his heart ache with appreciation and an overwhelming amount of love. It was funny how he could be tired one moment and then ready to give you the world the next. He didn’t know how you did it, knowing what he wanted before even he did, but this had confirmed his suspicions.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

He was going to have to marry you. There was no other choice now.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Christian climbed into the bed not long after showering. The movement had you brought from your sleep and you tiredly asked, ‘You’re home?’

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

‘Mm,’ he murmured as he pulled you into his arms, his lips resting against your forehead while you hummed, satisfied.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

‘Lori?’ you mumble in question, as if asking if he’d seen her yet.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

‘She’s here,’ he hummed, his eyes glancing down to the dog that was settling between the small space between your bodies, ‘How’d you know I missed her?’

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

‘Because I know you,’ you whisper tiredly while he smiled happily, the days’ struggles long forgotten as you both fell away from the world, the last words said that night being the best lullaby he could have ever asked for.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

I want to marry you, Y/N.

I know. Me too.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

[hyucc]

 In the end, we all have our struggles. We all have our thoughts, our feelings; our moments we want to get away from. But it’s worth it, if it’s for our Dreams