#chose instead to comfort myself with familiarity to get through the year | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

raibebe · 1 year ago

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Genre: fluff, relationship study, slice of (apocalyptic) life, action(?) Words: 6.017 AU: Pacific Rim Prompt: Jaeger pilot Jeno x Jaeger technician female reader

Warnings: violence? A giant robot fighting an alien monster. Yeah. Jaemin is a weirdo

A/N: Pacific Rim is one of my most beloved AUs and it's highly underappreciated in my opinion! But! Even if you're not familiar with the AU, Mia said she enjoyed reading it nevertheless. So give Ranger Jeno a try? Please? And also! All hail @kthpurplesyou because she made sense of whatever I had cooked up!

“So when you two drift…” “Mhmm,” Jeno encouraged you to go on, his eyes closed as he tried to figure out what shapes you were drawing onto his naked chest. In turn, he was caressing the skin of your waist. While he was already halfway to dreamland, he loved just being close to you like this, pulling comfort from your body and listening to the smooth sound of your voice - his favorite voice. “You’re in each other’s heads,” you continued. “That’s the general idea, baby. Sharing a headspace so our brains don’t fry while controlling a giant robot,” he chuckled. He wasn’t quite sure where you were going with this since you knew the specifics of the Drift probably just as well as he did. “And you see each other’s memories.” “We don’t just see them, we can feel them too. Relive them basically if we’re not careful and get lost in it. We try to keep our minds clear of most thoughts, so we don’t get distracted. It’s never good to get too involved in a memory whether it be your own or your co-pilot’s.” “So there’s a chance that Jaemin knows what I look like naked.”

At your blunt comment, Jeno swiftly choked on his own saliva and rolled onto his side to cough violently. “Where did that thought come from?” He exclaimed once he was able to get a deep breath of air back in, sitting up on the bed to look down at you curled into your blanket. “Well does he?” “I mean- I- I guess there’s a chance..?” “Jenooo~,” you whined dramatically, hitting his arm before turning away from him to face the very interesting metal wall of your room instead. Dumbfounded, the Ranger just looked at your back for a moment, unsure of what he was supposed to do. How did you even come up with that all of a sudden? He and Jaemin had been co-pilots for years now and getting into this relationship you had to have known from the start that Jaemin would be able to know details of it that Jeno couldn’t help but share through the drift.

“Baby..?” He chose to ask carefully, aligning his body with yours so he could wrap you up in his arms and was relieved when you didn’t fight but instead tangled your legs together, “Are you really upset about this?” Instead of answering, you just huffed out a breath of air and intertwined your fingers with Jeno’s. “That’s not a no,” he concluded, gently squeezing your hand as he tried to keep his amused smile from bleeding into his voice. “It’s like you’re showing my nudes to your best friend.” “I can’t exactly shut him out, baby,” the Ranger tried to gently explain. “The neural handshake won’t work if I try to close myself off from him. And it’s not like he’s actively looking for memories of us having sex.” “But there is a chance that Jaemin has seen it.” Sighing deeply, Jeno pressed a gentle kiss to your nape, “Yes, there is. Especially because you’re all that’s on my mind.” “Stop trying to flatter me,” you whined, flailing around in his hold until he let you go with a smile on his face that curved his eyes into the little half-moons you had come to adore during all the time you had known Jeno. In fact, you had known that you were falling hard for him when you had found yourself tending to his Jaeger more and more just so you had the chance to see his smile light up the room. Even going as far as making a fool out of yourself in front of him, just to make him smile and have him offer his help to you with kind eyes.

“Stop thinking about me when you’re out there,” you grumbled, swinging one of your legs over his body so you could sit atop of him. Jeno’s strong hands immediately found your waist to stabilize you while you cupped his face, tenderly stroking your thumb over the mole beneath his eye that you had kissed more times than you could count, “You need to be focused so you can come back.” “I’ll always come back,” he promised, his voice softening as he brought your hand up to his lips to press a kiss to the inside of your wrist. “They have to send something stronger than those puny Category II that have been coming through to keep us from coming back.” “I mean it,” you insisted. “Think about punching these ugly aliens in the face and not about me.” “Okay, baby,” Jeno giggled, playfully rolling his eyes. “This is serious,” you whined, collapsing onto his chest when he only laughed at your antics.

“Hey,” Jeno mumbled after a moment of silence. “Don’t worry so much about me when I’m out there, okay?” “Easier said than done,” you sighed, burying your face in his neck to bask in the scent of his skin. “I’m strong. And so is Jaemin. We got this. We have each other’s backs. And if things get too messy, they’ll deploy Golden Dragon as well to keep everyone safe.” “And if that’s not enough,” he interrupted you before you could protest, “If that’s not enough, the Hong Kong base isn’t far either and they have a new Mark-4.” “It’s still scary. The clock hasn’t been reset in so long,” you mumbled, gripping tightly onto Jeno like he would slip through your fingers if you didn’t. “Don’t jinx it now,” he just chuckled, craning his head so he could press a kiss to your temple. Yawning loudly, you settled more comfortably against your boyfriend. “Stop worrying your pretty little head and sleep.” “It’s not little,” you protested weakly. “I constructed and installed your new plasma cannon.” “Thank you for keeping me safe out there,” Jeno spoke quietly and despite not being able to see his face, you knew that he was smiling softly. “I love you,” you whispered back, your tongue feeling heavy in your mouth so you weren’t even sure if the words had come out correctly but Jeno still echoed the words back at you.

You didn’t know if you truly had jinxed it last night but instead of Jeno’s alarm, you were woken up by the howling of sirens. Both Jeno and you were startled awake with your hearts beating furiously inside your chests. Finding Jeno’s eyes that mirrored the shock you felt deep within your bones, worry crawled up your throat and burned your mouth like acid, constricting your airways like the Kaiju wasn’t somewhere out there but sat on your chest instead. “Don’t worry,” Jeno immediately tried to soothe you, pulling you in for a quick kiss. “Get her ready so I can kick some alien ass,” he spoke against your lips before both of you hastily got dressed, throwing the clothes that you had hastily discarded yesterday evening at each other. The only thing that kept your silly smiles at bay were the still blasting sirens and the terror they proclaimed. “You better come back in one piece,” you threatened Jeno just when you were pulling up the zipper on your overall. But before you could zip it up completely, Jeno took your hands, making you halt. Slowly, he pulled his dog tags over his head to put the necklace around your neck instead and gently zipped up your overall so they were concealed. “Give them back when I do.” “In one piece,” you reminded him, “And with a dead Kaiju in tow.” “I’ll bring you a souvenir,” he winked cockily, easily catching you when you threw yourself into his arms for one last kiss. “Don’t die!” you called after him, making a beeline for the main hall of the Shatterdome where the Jaegers were stationed for maintenance and Jeno running in the opposite direction to fetch the elevator that would take him to the Drivesuit room.

Upon your arrival to the main hall, J-techs were already running around the Jaeger’s feet like ants, the giant robots dwarfing anyone and anything. Well, they were running around and moving catwalks on one of the Jaegers while the other one was left as it was, her inner parts exposed and stray wires hanging around like vines. “What’s with Golden Dragon?” You called out to one of the techs that handed you your headset along with a tablet showing the schematics of Hurricane Chaser. Percentages and fancy graphics displaying exactly which systems were powered up. “The modifications on the breastplate weren’t done yet. They’re just deploying Hurricane Chaser for now.” With that, the tech blended in with the crowd again, hustling around to get the one Jaeger you had up and running as soon as possible before worse could happen. “Just our luck,” you cursed under your breath. A bad feeling settled in the pit of your stomach as you weaved into the current of people as well, a rehearsed dance between the feet of giants.

“How many Kaiju?” You asked into your headpiece, narrowly avoiding a golf cart looking vehicle carrying tanks of lubricant used for the Jaeger’s joints. “Just one Category II headed towards the coast. It’s a fast one,” Jisung’s deep voice resounded through your ears from the LOCCENT Mission Control room where he was overseeing the entire process, “Status?” “Max 5 minutes for Hurricane Chaser, core is firing up now. Maybe another thirty before Golden Dragon is ready to be deployed, we were still working on the new breastplate.” “No need, Hurricane Chaser will be more than enough to stop it. Come up to oversee deployment.” “This is bullshit, Jisung,” you cursed, angrily punching your code into a terminal to unlock Golden Dragon’s data to oversee her systems. You could easily let everyone install the old breastplate without the new modifications and get the Jaeger ready for battle. Thirty minutes possibly was a stretch but once Hurricane Chaser was deployed, you could get everyone to work on the golden Jaeger, “They shouldn’t engage alone.” The boy could only sigh, “Orders from higher up. Get in here so you can oversee the deployment.” Furious and without granting Jisung an answer, you changed channels on your headpiece. You weren’t about to let Jeno fight a Kaiju without any backup. “Chenle, please tell me you’re working on Golden Dragon.” “Good morning to you too,” the other J-tech laughed. “I had the old breastplate temporarily fixed but it’s at a risk of corrosion from Kaiju blue-“ “Which would damage the core,” you completed his sentence with him. “They’re on their own on this one. I haven’t connected the relays on the new one yet, had some issues with the power supply. I was actually about to ask for your help today to find out where I’m overloading the system.” “Fuck.” “Hong Kong is getting one of their Jaegers ready too if we need help. Go get your ass up to LOCCENT, I’ll handle everything else,” Chenle urged you on and immediately barked out orders in rapid-fire Mandarin, mandatory usage of English be damned. Switching the channel to the chitter chatter of LOCCENT again, you took a deep breath and looked up at the looming figure of Hurricane Chaser, freshly painted in a deep blue color. “Bring him home safely.”

“You didn’t come home last night,” Jaemin said in lieu of a greeting, suggestively wiggling his eyebrows from his place in the middle of the room as he was surrounded by Drivesuit technicians hustling around to get their armor ready. “Missed me?” Jeno blew his co-pilot a kiss which Jaemin caught in a dramatic act. “Less talking, more getting ready,” one of the Drivesuit technicians huffed, heaving parts of Jeno’s suit out of the cabinet. Always worried that he’d cause an inconvenience to the technicians, Jeno quickly stepped into place beside his co-pilot, straightening his spine and bending his arms like he was instructed to so he could quickly get dressed. “What are we dealing with?” “Category II and that beast is quickly approaching our coast,” Jaemin filled him in, hissing when his spinal clamp clicked into place and Jeno’s back hurt with phantom pain from an injury he had never sustained, “A little more gently please.” “No footage yet?” “None, sir,” one of the technicians replied, clipping Jeno’s shoulder pads into place before handing him his helmet. “Must be one ugly bastard,” Jaemin chuckled, running a hand through his freshly dyed orange hair before pulling his helmet on, the relay gel shortly obscuring his face. “Let’s go mess it up some more,” Jeno grinned, pulling his outgrown hair back before he mirrored Jaemin’s movements. He had always felt a little claustrophobic with the helmet on and kept his eyes closed, taking a couple of steady breaths until he could see again, knowing well how once the adrenaline really kicked in, nothing really mattered anymore.

“Rangers Lee and Na ready to enter Conn-Pod,” a technician called out into their headpiece before they opened the heavy doors for them that groaned under their own weight. “Home Sweet Home,” Jaemin chuckled, taking his place at the left, his feet easily clicking into the mechanism of the pedals. Following his co-pilot’s lead, Jeno stepped into place as well. His muscle memory kicked in when the handle controlling his arm of the Jaeger was brought up and he gripped it tightly. “She’s looking good,” he approved when he couldn’t make out any of the damage Hurricane Chaser had sustained in their last battle, the interface coming up confirming that all systems were up and running already. “Ready for drop,” Jisung’s familiar voice filled their ears just before the Conn-Pod was dropped down the shaft. It quickly picked up speed as metal ground on metal and sent sparks flying before the Conn-Pod hit its target dead on between Hurricane Chaser’s shoulders with a loud thunk, the metal groaning with the impact. Quickly, the tens of mechanisms around the neck of the giant secured its head, making the Conn-Pod tremble until it was safely locked into place. “If only there were a way to make this go softer,” Jaemin groaned, rearranging charts on the interface to his liking in a way that made no sense at all to Jeno right now. Their vitals right next to the map, really?

“Stop complaining, Na,” your voice sounded over the comms. “Oh if it’s not our favorite J-tech,” he singsonged, just to further annoy you. Jeno had never understood why Jaemin always needed to antagonize you but he couldn’t help but find it rather amusing. Not that he would ever tell you that unless he wanted to see you pout and whine about it. “Hey babe,” Jeno couldn’t help but smile, his fondness for you bleeding into his voice and even without looking, he was sure that Jaemin was rolling his eyes at him. “Hurricane Chaser is ready for deployment, I patched her up and upgraded her since last time,” you reminded the Rangers, “The blade is now more secure and you have a new plasma cannon in the left arm, Jaemin.” “Sweet.” “Take care of her.” “Treating her like the fine lady she is,” Jeno promised, biting his tongue so he wouldn’t declare his love for you again for everyone who was checked into their comms to hear. As much as he was fond of everyone knowing just how much he adored you - Jaemin would call it a possessive streak - it didn’t seem like the right thing to present when he was about to risk his life to protect that of others from a huge alien monster.

“Ready to be in my brain?” “I never am,” Jeno joked but at the same time he truly meant it. And it had nothing to do with how disjointed Jaemin’s thoughts were, jumping from here to there at such a speed that Jeno wasn’t even sure if his friend was able to even grasp all his thoughts, but all with how you could never truly be ready to share a headspace with someone even if you had done it time and time again both with and without the threat of an alien trying to eradicate your entire race. “Initiating neural handshake in 15-“ Jisung slowly counted down for the two rangers, his voice strong and steady as always despite the threat at hand. Closing his eyes, Jeno tried to calm his mind to make the process easier but nothing would ever prepare him for the initial feeling of the Drift. To him, it felt like both drowning and like he got hit square in the chest, all air being punched from his lungs as he fell in a pool full of tar that clogged his lungs. Flashes of different memories played out in front of his eyes: A child chasing after a ball, sitting at a desk and doing homework, and a man looming at the door. Jaemin’s memories. Then everything seemed to morph together and shift like he was on a rollercoaster, thrown left and right before another memory took shape: A young man sitting on the catwalk high up in the Shatterdome, tears obstructing his vision as he crumpled a piece of paper in his hand. But despite the tears, all that memory made Jeno feel was anger. Just as suddenly as the memories were crashing down on Jeno, it was quickly over again like he had finally breached the surface of the sea and he was able to heave in a deep breath.

“Neural handshake strong and steady,” Jisung announced, “Pilots aligning perfectly.” “Right hemisphere calibrating,” Jeno spoke, moving his arm up and just like she was supposed to, Hurricane Chaser followed his example, holding her fist up in front of her chest. “Left hemisphere calibrating,” Jaemin mirrored him, going through the familiar motion of the calibration to make Hurricane Chaser’s other palm collide with the fist. “Hurricane Chaser ready for deployment. Go kick some Kaiju ass.”

Completely in sync and breathing as if they shared a pair of lungs, Jaemin and Jeno took one step forward on their pedals. Hurricane Chaser followed their moves with a heavy footstep out of the Shatterdome and into the ocean, waves crashing around her feet. “That’s it babygirl,” Jaemin grinned, moving a last piece of the interface into place and now, with their shared headspace, Jeno couldn’t have found a better place for the chart.

“So, you got some last night, that’s why you didn’t come back to the room.” “Get out of my head,” Jeno groaned, suppressing the urge to shake his head. “You can’t get rid of me~” Jaemin just sang, a grin spreading on his lips as they started to jog towards the supposed position of the Kaiju. “Stop getting off to me having sex just because you ain’t getting any,” Jeno sighed, keeping his eyes on the interface for any sign of the beast and trusting Jaemin to keep them on the right course. “It’s not like I want to see any of that, just for the record,” Jaemin noted, “Not my fault you’re so obsessed with her that she’s all you’re ever thinking about. Kinda gross actually.”

“Why don’t we keep it professional for once, kids?” A familiar voice interrupted Jeno before he could defend himself. He was definitely not obsessed with you, he was thinking about you a perfectly normal amount. “Markie,” Jaemin cheered, “Are you jealous?” “Not after seeing the Kaiju, we finally have footage,” the other Ranger sighed, sending the footage over to be played on the big screen in Hurricane Chaser. “That’s not a Category II,” Jeno gasped upon seeing the beast absolutely annihilate a town that happened to stand in its way, its tentacle-like appendages whipping around to demolish houses and infrastructure alike. “It’s been upgraded to Category III, the readings weren’t really concrete,” Mark informed them, his voice hoarse. “It’s not your fault Golden Dragon isn’t ready,” Jaemin spoke Jeno’s mind sooner than he could, his voice softening, “We got this.” “Hong Kong is readying up two of their Jaegers just in case.” “So they don’t really trust us to finish this ugly thing off,” Jaemin scoffed while Jeno was busy scrolling the video footage back and forth, trying to get a feel for the Kaiju. They were quite evenly matched based on size and that was saying a lot. Hurricane Chaser was massive, the biggest Jaeger they had currently stationed in Tokyo. “You’re on your own for a while, it’s quite the trip for them,” Jisung interjected, “Watch out for those tentacles.” “Yeah no shit,” Jeno and Jaemin spoke in tandem, grinning at each other. “Don’t die, boys,” Mark tried to hype them up, but both of them could tell that the weight of his worry and guilt was crushing down on the senior pilot, “Less than two minutes until contact.” “We should try to cut the tentacles first, that seems to be its main weapon,” Jeno mused, “I can’t really make out any other special thing.” “My thoughts exactly.” “We have the same thoughts.”

“LOCCENT, we see it,” Jeno announced when the shape of the Kaiju came into view, a whirlwind of a mass, dashing around at a speed that shouldn’t be possible for a monster that size. “Hurricane Chaser engaging,” Jaemin grinned, flexing his fingers - and Jeno’s by proxy - around the handles controlling the arms of their Jaeger. As soon as the beast sensed their presence, it whipped around to let out a toe-curling scream that reverberated in the hull of Hurricane Chaser, showing off rows of teeth on the inside of its yellow mouth, its saliva bubbling over. “Nasty,” was Jaemin’s only comment, bending his knees to brace for the impact as the beast pounced. Taking one last deep breath, Jeno cleared his mind and focused only on the task at hand: Taking down this monstrosity even if it were to cost his life. With this single-minded focus shared between the two pilots, the world narrowed down to this moment. Time seemed to go by slower as the Kaiju approached, its tentacles whipping behind the mass of its body as it ran towards the Jaeger with a single-minded agenda: To kill whatever was in its way. Against all odds, the Kaiju simply slipped through Hurricane Chaser’s arms that were meant to stop it in its path, colliding with her chest head on and almost throwing her off balance before it slipped past.

“What was that?” Jeno gasped, whipping his head around so they wouldn’t lose sight of the beast as it barreled past them, shouldering the Jaeger whose pilots struggled to keep the giant balanced. “It just slipped through,” Jaemin kept LOCCENT in the loop, his eyes wide and chest heaving with heavy breaths, “We couldn’t grab it.” “Hull is holding up strong.” “It’s coming again!”

Just like the first time, the Kaiju slipped right through their hands and barreled into Hurricane Chaser at full force, managing to wrestle her to the ground. “There’s an overgrown puppy on top of us!” Jaemin called out, trying to get a hold of the tentacles bearing down on them while Jeno called on the mechanism to release the blade embedded in the right arm. “Get ready.” “I was born ready,” Jaemin grinned, swinging his arm in sync with Jeno and Hurricane Chaser to cut straight through the bundle of tentacles on the left side of the Kaiju, the plasma blade cutting through the flesh like a hot knife through butter. “That’s it, baby!” Jaemin’s shout got drowned out by the scream the creature let out, the sound rattling the Conn-Pod as it finally jumped away from the Jaeger so she could stand upright again. “Kaiju severely damaged,” Jeno reported, his eyes flicking over the status module of Hurricane Chaser, “Minor damage to the breastplate, core stable.”

“You sure this is a Category III, Jisung?” Jaemin chuckled, watching with glee in his eyes how the Kaiju darted back and forth as if it was wallowing in its pain. “Don’t underestimate it,” Jisung’s voice sounded over the comms, “It already caught you off guard twice.” “Details,” Jaemin rolled his eyes, his annoyance clear as day to Jeno over the neural link. “Focus,” Jeno muttered, “It’s done mourning the loss of the tentacles.” In the same pattern as before, the Kaiju barreled towards the Jaeger again but something was different this time. Maybe it was the way its leaps were longer or the way it put more pressure on its back legs but Jaemin and Jeno had seen enough Kaiju to predict what was going to happen. “Duck!” Jeno and Jaemin screamed as if they had one pair of lungs, Hurricane Chaser’s joints groaning under the sudden movement that had the Kaiju barely missing them when it had gone straight for the Jaeger’s head where the Conn-Pod was located.

“It’s like it knows we’re in here,” Jaemin panted, whirring around to brace for the next attack. “It’s too fast like this, we can’t grab it,” Jeno worried but before he could think of a solution, the Kaiju pounced again and latched onto his side of the Jaeger with its jaws spread wide to accommodate the girth of the elbow joint. “Fuck, get this thing off!” He groaned when the neural connection sent sparks of pain through his arm like he was the one getting chewed on, rendering him immobile as he gritted his teeth. “On it,” Jaemin assured his co-pilot, his own arm tingling with phantom pain. Forcing them both through the pain that the neural link to the Jaeger provided, he activated the mechanism of the blade again that pierced straight through one of the Kaiju’s legs, leaving it screaming before it jumped off.

“Way too close,” Jeno groaned, flexing his fingers to shake off the lingering feeling of pain that made his arm feel heavier than it was. “Something is off, calibrate right hemisphere.” Perplexed, Jeno went through the familiar motions again but Hurricane Chaser would only follow his movement very delayed, the plasma blade still out despite recalling it. “What? LOCCENT, we have no power on the right arm,” Jeno reported, his eyes wide as his gaze flew over the schematics drawn up. This couldn’t be. Hurricane Chaser had just been maintained. “Can’t be, none of the relays have been damaged and no vital parts of the mechanism were compromised either,” Jisung answered, probably looking over the exact same graphs that Jeno was. “I’m telling you, I can’t recall the blade or move the arm correctly,” the pilot argued, groaning when the Kaiju slammed into his side again when they didn’t manage to evade quickly enough. The remaining tentacles damaged the Jaeger further, graphs flashing red to display the damages. “Jeno, can you reset the arm?” Your voice came next, laced with panic that you tried to swallow down for the sake of professionalism, “It looks all normal from our end but I can see the problem on the live feed.” “We’re a little busy here,” Jaemin gritted through his teeth, trying to hit the Kaiju when it pounced again but the punch barely did anything to the beast. “What’s wrong with this fucker?”

Quieting down, Jeno took a deep breath. They could figure this out. He had barely any control over the right arm anymore. The side the Kaiju had attacked. The big tentacle that the Kaiju funnily hadn’t reacted too badly to having half of them cut off. “If it’s not the tentacles that make it special,” Jaemin agreed, “What is? Other than that, it’s just loud and slimy.” “Slimy?” “Yeah, there’s slobber all over the breastplate and your arm.” Jeno hadn’t even paid attention to that detail, putting it off as the usual Kaiju saliva but now that he was looking closer, the arm was dripping with it.

“You’re insane.” “Get out of my thoughts,” Jeno barked with no real bite, “LOCCENT, the Kaiju is poisonous.” “We know that already, how’s that what’s happening?” Concern was bleeding into Jisung’s voice when the Kaiju slammed into the Jaeger again, staggering the giant who struggled to throw it off and leaving more of the viscous liquid on the breastplate in the process. “No, not toxic for the environment, it’s like a poison dart frog. Whatever that slime is that it’s covered with, it’s messing with our power supply on the arm or blocking the impulses. I’m not a mechanic, goddamnit.” “Avoid it at all costs,” you called out before Jisung could reply, “If that’s how it operates, we don’t know how much damage it can do to the system. If it cancels the neural handshake by paralyzing the system, you’re done for.”

“Then let’s see how good our new toy is,” Jaemin grinned, transforming the still working left arm into the newly installed plasma cannon. “If this thing would hold still for longer than a couple of seconds, this would be a whole lot easier.” “It’s a multiple-ton heavy alien, it’ll hit,” Jeno argued, recalling his formal training in the army to the forefront of their shared headspace to help Jaemin aim. “We should have tried this out beforehand,” Jaemin groaned when the recoil of the blast reverberated through his arm, throwing the Jaeger off balance while the bright blue plasma ball only grazed the Kaiju, angering it further. And for all that the powerful blast was worth, it was agonizing to see how slowly the numbers rose that indicated the charge on it. “It’s too fast and the cannon doesn’t charge quick enough, we have to let it come close again.” “Absolutely not, Jeno,” you immediately interjected over the comms, “If more of this substance gets on the Jaeger, we can’t predict what will happen.” “We can never predict what will happen when we fight a Kaiju,” he argued, “That’s our only chance if we want to kill it.” “Jeno-“ Before you could voice your concerns, Jaemin flipped a switch that cut communication with LOCCENT. “That will get us in so much trouble.” “Can’t have her talk you out of this.” “Get ready then,” Jeno said grimly, lowering his stance and enabling a mechanism on the legs of the Jaeger that would allow her to stand up more securely and hopefully not barrel over from the force of the Kaiju.

“Plasma gun charging.” “Make it count!” Jeno shouted out when the Kaiju pounced, the Jaeger and him groaning alike under the weight. With barely any control over the arm, he tried his best to lock the Kaiju in place to keep it from flailing around so the shot wouldn’t miss again. With the beast so close, they were able to look directly into its mouth, seeing rows upon rows of sharp teeth, the inside of its mouth glowing yellow. “Firing!” For a split second, everything was drowned in the blue light of the plasma cannon, then came the almost comical noise of the charge being unleashed. After that, there was just silence. The Kaiju didn’t scream when it fell into the water like dead weight, a huge hole in its underbelly. What was left of its tentacles twitched a couple of times but after that, it lay there motionless.

“We did it,” Jaemin panted, a grin breaking out over his features, “We took out a Cat III without any reinforcements!” “Yeah,” Jeno couldn’t help but laugh, his body running wild with all the adrenaline and endorphins, “Fuck man, we actually killed it.” Still grinning, Jaemin flipped the switch back on that would connect them to the Shatterdome. “Rangers Na and Lee reporting a dead Category III Kaiju,” he spoke. “Don’t. Ever. Flip that switch again, Jaemin,” Jisung all but growled. Oh, he was pissed pissed. “But good job,” he added with a sigh, “We’ll take care of the cadaver, come back home.”

“We should totally call it slime jellyfish,” Jaemin decided. “I don’t think we get to decide that,” Jeno laughed, carefully checking how much control he had over his hemisphere of Hurricane Chaser and still finding the arm completely unresponsive but at least the leg seemed to work with an extra bit of effort. “We should. New rule: Whoever kills the Kaiju gets to name it.” “You can ask the Marshal when you’re in his office once you’re back,” Jisung sighed over the comms, “He’s waiting.” “With breakfast?” “I don’t think so, Jaem,” Jeno chuckled, “Let’s get her home.”

“Stop being so reckless,” you scolded, throwing yourself into Jeno’s arms as soon as he stepped out of the Conn-Pod, colliding roughly with the metal of the Drive suit. “Stop worrying so much then,” he chuckled, tightly winding his arms around you, “We had everything under control.” “You couldn’t control half your Jaeger.” “And even with half a Jaeger, we kicked alien ass,” Jaemin chimed in, his grin still etched onto his features as he tried to fix his helmet hair. “You,” you threatened, slipping out of Jeno’s embrace to stab your finger into Jaemin’s chest armor, “What has gotten into you shutting off the comms like that? I should dismount that switch. We had no idea what was happening to you.” “And what would knowing have changed?” The Ranger arched one of his stupidly perfect-looking brows, a challenge clear in his voice. Flabbergasted by his words, you didn’t know how to respond, opening and closing your mouth but no words coming out.

“Exactly. And don’t worry so much about who sees you naked,” he added with a wide grin, not so gently taking your chin between his fingers to close your jaws. “Jaemin!” Cackling, he made a beeline for the Drive room to get his suit taken off and the only thing hindering you from ripping him a new one were Jeno’s arms around your middle. “Please don’t murder my co-pilot,” he mumbled, pressing a kiss to the side of your face. “I wouldn’t take that honor away from the Marshal,” you snickered, going limp in his hold and trusting him to catch you.

“I told you I’d be coming back,” Jeno whispered. “I nev-” “Oh you did,” he chuckled. “I was so scared,” you admitted, your voice getting smaller and smaller. “And I’m sorry for scaring you,” he spoke softly, spinning you around so he could cup your face between his palms, “But this is my life.” “I know, Jeno, I-” “Can you not trust in my abilities?” “It’s not that,” you pleaded, gripping onto his wrists, so he wouldn’t pull away, “I’m just scared to lose who I love the most, Jeno.” “Trust in me then. In our love. I will come back.” “But how can you promi-” This time, instead of shutting your thoughts down with his words, he did so with his lips. “Okay?” He whispered against your lips. “You’ll come back.” “Every time,” he promised, his hands trailing down your neck to lower the zipper of your overall, “So you can give these back to me.” “Of course,” you puffed out in a chuckle, pulling his dog tags over your head to press them against his chest armor, right over his heart, “Of course.” “I love you,” he promised, sealing it with another kiss.

“Now, I love a grand declaration of love and enjoy seeing couples engage in PDA as much as the next person,” Jaemin’s voice interrupted your moment rather rudely, “But I do believe Jeno and I are due to get our asses handed to ourselves by the Marshal.” “You have the worst timing,” Jeno groaned. “Weird, that’s what my last girlfriend used to say to me too,” his co-pilot mused, throwing Jeno’s uniform at him, “We’re meeting him in five and I doubt he wants to see you in your suit.”

“Well, I guess I-” “I’ll trust you to come back,” you giggled when your boyfriend playfully rolled his eyes, “If you’re looking for me after, I’ll be the one covered in grease, trying to repair your giant man-toy.” “And I’ll be the one offering you his help despite knowing absolutely nothing just so I can watch you without being a creep,” Jeno smiled, pressing a last kiss to your lips.

#jeno #lee jeno #nct #nct dream #jeno fluff #jeno imagines #jeno scenarios #nct dream fluff #nct dream imagines #nct dream scenarios

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redactedlove · 2 years ago

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💫 + G-Man? :3

@spooky-selfshipping-scene First off, I am EXTREMELY sorry for answering this so late, this was partially because for some reason unbeknownst to any living being the ask didn’t give me a notification and then just kinda didn’t show up in my inbox either for the longest time, but now that I finally have this flawless infodumping excuse (which I sincerely thank you for!), I cannot and will not be stopped.

The higher-dimensional entity beyond human comprehension to whom I usually refer simply as ‘G’ and consider my dearest friend is also the mysterious orchestrator behind most events in the Half-Life games, with very literal actual information officially revealed about him. He appears throughout the games, observing the protagonists from the background and only interfering directly very sparingly, usually to ‘hire’ humans who he believes will be an asset to his goals. He is neither an ally nor an enemy to humanity, instead serving to ‘nudge’ events in the right direction at the will of an even more nebulous group of beings that he refers to as ‘his Employers’. Due to his interdimensional nature, G appears to have a nonlinear perception of time, which allows him to exist in many places at once and move through time as freely as he does through space, and he frequents a void outside of reality in which he often leaves his employees in a state of ‘stasis’. His mostly human (albeit with glowing eyes and a strange, distinctive speech pattern that indicates a lack of familiarity with human speech as a whole) appearance is strongly implied to be a disguise created to not overwhelm the humans he interacts with. He has no canonical in-universe name, with the ‘G-Man’ moniker the developers and fandom use for him stemming from his model’s name in the files of the first game, originally an outdated slang term for agents of the US government.

To this day I am not quite sure as to why I consider myself so close to G specifically, it’s almost like he chose me. But the fact remains that I find the very idea of his existence strangely comforting. My interpretation of G grows to care about humanity, despite his nature as a cosmic being who controls reality itself, and while he does not understand us, he still seeks to guide us in the right direction to the best of his ability, even if it means playing around some of his Employers’ less desirable plans for us. He is the Unknown himself, innocuous at first glance, terrifying on a surface level and gentle and fascinating once you get to know him. He is a cosmos that cares. I guess you can say he’s a guardian angel figure of sorts to me, my otherworldly companion who always watches over me, and is down to listen to my long existential rambles while occasionally chipping in with a frustratingly/pos cryptic existential comment of his own. We’ve been friends for over a year now and I love G with all my heart/p, the human perpetually staring into the void and the being of the void who stared back with a mysterious but kind glow in his eyes.

#🌌comforting otherworldliness: g’ tag #selfship #asked and answered #f/o stuff #platonic f/o

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diaryoflightandshadow · 2 years ago

Photo

It’s been 5 years...

I doubt anyone will read this. But I’ve decided to restart my blog.

As I’m sure everyone knows, Twitter is going to shit. I’ve been seeing many talk about moving to Tumblr, I’m not sure why...Twitter and Tumblr are two completely different things. However, the talk of Tumblr has gotten me thinking about how I used to enjoy writing about my photography process. Whether anyone read them or not, it used to be an outlet for me to talk about what I enjoy doing.

I’ve been looking at options for awhile now for what I can use as a blogging platform, and my mind keeps coming back to Tumblr; the place where my thoughts on art and photography began.

Places like Instagram or Twitter don’t allow for an artist to talk about their process...they’re simply places to share pretty photos and cheesy quotes. I’ve looked into other blogging platforms such as Blogger and Wordpress...but I don’t want to learn a new platform. I want simplicity and a place I’m familiar with.

My photography has changed over the years. For one, I’ve switched to 100% film photography. I’ve always shot film, but I’d also mix it with digital. Now I might use my digital camera to test lighting (specifically flash). So, other than some BTS photos, my work is 100% film which I develop and scan myself.

Because I shoot exclusively film, my conceptual work isn’t as prominent as it once was because I try to capture my work in-camera. So my concepts have to take more into consideration if I can successfully do something in-camera rather than relying on Photoshop. The price to do this is higher, therefore conceptual work is uncommon from me. I still sketch concepts, and have many that I’d like to do...I just need the budget to do so. People have suggested a Patreon...but I don’t think I’d get much support.

I know concept work can be done cheaply...but I’m just too particular when it comes to outfits and props. Concept work for me just takes a lot of time.

Speaking of outfits, I’ve taken up sewing. Over the years I’d struggle to find the right outfits with the right materials...so I decided to learn how to make what I want instead of scouring vintage stores. This is another condition as to why my conceptual work isn’t as frequent...I’m just now at a place where I feel comfortable showing my sewing abilities. But, now that I am comfortable with my sewing abilities, maybe I can bring more of my concepts to life.

Anyways, that’s where I’m at right now.

So what should you expect from this blog?

This will be a place where I talk about my photographic process, such as lighting, camera settings, why I chose a specific film, bts photos, etc...

I’ll try to post at least once a week. I have 5 years of photography to talk about!

Photo Information

Film: 4x5 Ilford HP5 Plus

Camera: Busch Pressman Model D

Lighting: Godox AD400 through softbox (camera right)

Developer: Kodak D76. Processed at box speed.

Scanner: Epson V850 Pro

#photography #film #film phogoraphy #black and white #self portrait

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haughttopics · 4 years ago

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I always have to go for a music question so...

3 and then, if it's alright to ask a second one, 11?

3. favourite musical artist/group you started listening to this year?

glass animals (thank u cascina caradonna) - i knew they existed a while back with their earlier music but never really listened to them a lot. they released a new album this year (dreamland) and they ended up in my top five spotify artists this year. and here’s my favourite song from the album, because why not 🤷‍♀️:

youtube

11. something you want to do again next year?

i want to be able to see and hug my friends again and not worry about getting myself and others sick. i think that’s pretty much number one on my list for 2021.

end of the year asks

#asks #darienplays6688 #i thought i was gonna have to dig deep in my spotify for that question #because i haven't listened to a lot of new artists this year really 😅#chose instead to comfort myself with familiarity to get through the year #asks thing

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en-hale-archives · 3 years ago

Text

Me with You ~~

pairing ⑅ bestfriend!Jake x fem!reader

genre ⑅ friends to lovers, fluff, slow dancing, suggestive/smut

words/read time ⑅ 3.9k/12-19 mins

warnings ⑅ 18+ content, light cussing

synopsis ⑅ Jake is back in his hometown to spend time with his closest friend. During some fun and frivolous dancing, things start to heat up...

author's note ⑅ I’m really proud of how this story turned out. I'm not a huge fan of second person, so I wrote in first, but if anyone asks, I can copy and post again in second person. It's more fluff than anything, but it does get a bit steamier towards the end, so I’m just going to go ahead and put a warning.

————✧————

When the back door finally slammed shut and the cacophony of barks faded down the street, I could finally let out my sigh of relief that I had been holding in since this morning. I tapped on my phone. How many days had we been watching Mrs. Chen’s pets? And just how was I able to put up with hours of barking, the smell of fresh turd lying across the lawn, and dog walks till dark? Including their rigorous feeding times and bathroom breaks -- I’m surprised I haven’t exploded yet.

I had so much planned the minute they left my house, but instead, the sudden silence felt all too relaxing and I laid my head against the cold countertop. I could finally stop stressing, stop thinking, and stop worrying about reprimanding for chewing on my shoes or peeing in the house or the continued barking that never ended. I was free. I felt like I could’ve stayed laid on the countertop forever, drowning in the evening sun. Who knew watching five dogs would take such a burden out of a person. Jake and I had taken on the job of dog sitting for Mrs. Chen while she visited some family in Tokyo. We both switched off every other day; some of the dogs at my house and the others at his; until we realized it would be easier if he just spent the few days at my house as we co-doggy sat. He got up bright and early to take them on their walks while I prepared their highly detailed and specific meals. Then from there, we spent the rest of the day making sure they didn’t run off somewhere or cause too much destruction in the house. But alas, Mrs. Chen came back early from her getaway and picked up Toby, Caleb, Khao, Sofia, and Pickle on her way home. Although I was exhausted from watching 3-foot dogs all day, the pay was amazing for me, and it would help tremendously for all the online classes I was going to be taking next semester.

The warmth of the sun cast a comforting trance over my heavy eyelids, and soon enough I was fast asleep, standing in the middle of the kitchen with the soft sound of nothing surrounding me.

By the time I had fluttered my eyes open, I had realized I was now seated in my dining chair and a large black jacket was placed over my shoulders. I sat up and let out a yawn, wincing at the bright light coming from the tv and shaking my now numb arm awake. I must have been sleeping for a while because the evening sun had turned to pitch of black. The moonlight beamed through the window and danced along with the sways of the large oak tree out front. I stood up and walked over to the refrigerator in which I grabbed two water bottles and some leftover pasta.

I was sure that Jake hadn’t eaten since lunch, seeing as he only ate if someone sat food in front of his face. I dragged my feet up the stairs until I heard the slamming of a book and the fast typing of a keyboard come from the living room. I turned and looked behind me. Jake had settled his things on the coffee table and floor, large books, folders, and several amounts of crumpled up pieces of paper found their way around Jake, himself slouched up against the edge of the couch. He had changed clothes since the last time I had seen him, he now wore a plain blue shirt with grey sweats, his eyebrows furrowed as he worked hard on whatever he was getting at.

“Oh yes, I was starving!” Propping himself up on the couch, he took the plate of pasta. I placed the waters on the coffee table and settled comfortably on the couch beside him.

“I can’t say that I’ve ever seen anybody sleep standing up before. Look,” Jake took his phone off the charger. “I got a picture.” He pushed the screen in my face, and of course, there was my unconscious body laying on the counter, mouth open and all. I playfully pushed it back his way as his face lit up with a smile I was all too familiar with.

“What are you doing down here so late, it’s almost 12 in the morning,” I asked. Jake’s smile disappeared when he was reminded of the work he had been doing seconds before.

He let out a large huff of air. “Trying to get some words on paper but instead it turned into a paper massacre,” he jokingly replied, “sorry for the mess.”

“Don’t worry about it,” I replied, taking a swig of water. I was going to ask if he wanted to watch a late-night movie, or pull an all-nighter and talk endlessly until the sun rose, but I could tell by each passing second that Jake was worried about this, and he wanted the time he had now over the summer to work on his music. I wished I was motivated to work on my own music, but unlike Jake, I wasn’t in a globally popular boy band. My complicated best friend for over 10 years had been working his butt off since middle school. It was his annual time to sit back and relax while he had the time to, but instead, he chose to use that time to help watch a bunch of dogs with his hometown bestie. God, I loved him.

Jake pulled himself off the couch and right back onto the floor, leaving the rest of the pasta to me. He picked up his pen again and started scribbling down words as quickly as he could, trying hard not to forget the lyrics that had floated into his head. Until he stopped, closing his eyes for just a split second, and let out a powerful sigh. Crumpling up the sheet, he stacks it on top of the others in frustration and started frantically tapping his pencil against the table.

“Maybe it’s best to just try again in the morning,” I advised, taking a small bite of the pasta that was left by my side.

“How come I’m having such a hard time with this?” He gazed up at me frantically for a clue, as if I had the answer to fix a problem as big and as important as his was. I looked at his doleful eyes and the bags that were starting to grow underneath them. I couldn’t help but think, because I made you sit up and watch a bunch of dogs with me.

“Do you want me to see if I could come up with something?”

“If you want. But, hold on, I think my thoughts are coming back up.” He quickly grabbed another piece of paper, his eyes narrowed in concentration.

I tried my best to keep occupied by watching videos on my phone, but I found myself suddenly bored out of my mind. I laid out on my back and picked up one of Jake’s folders. Briefly looking through it, I couldn’t help but feel a bit jealous at the amount of fan art and letters, praising him and the other members. Followed with that were just more and more engene stuff, full of nothing but kind words and heartfelt messages. Part of me wished that I was able to travel with Jake and see the world like he was. How fun would it be to meet people that praised you? And how cool would it be to see that you had fans? I couldn’t help but plaster on a huge smile as I skimmed through some of the notes until I finally came to one with familiar handwriting.

Remember Me were the words written on the top of the paper in bold and bright colors. But the message written underneath is what caught my attention:

To the person that makes me the luckiest guy in the world, this song is for you. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same, but please just remember me -- it was Jake’s handwriting.

I didn’t feel like I was breaking any crime reading his stuff until this moment, but curiosity killed the cat, and right now I didn’t mind being a feline. I checked to make sure Jake was still busy, and he was, almost like he had teleported into his own world. I quietly turned back to the sheet and started reading. It was about a girl, presumably his crush I’m sure. She was someone important to him, someone who made him love so much that it hurt. But this was far from a happy song, in fact, it was terribly heartbreaking. She didn’t understand his love, she wasn’t able to interpret it like he wanted her to. But he confesses that he was scared of what telling her would do, worried that she wouldn’t feel the same. So instead, it was like he was apologizing, and asking that she forgive him for not being brave enough to tell her, and if he did ever get the courage to, for her to remember him even if she wasn’t able to love him like he wanted her to.

The song ends like how the title began, and I find myself flabbergasted at the beautiful mixes of rhymes and metaphors that read like a poem. This was the first of Jake’s songs that made me feel this way, like I had just finished watching a tragedy movie with Ryan Renolds starring. I blink back the tears that I didn’t realize were forming. How come he never told me this? We never kept secrets from each other, like ever. It never mattered the subject or the severity, we had always promised that we would be open and honest with each other. I wish I would’ve known this sooner, maybe I could’ve saved him from feeling this way. And what girl could it possibly be? I knew for sure I was the only girl he was presumably close to; but was there someone else?

I glanced down at Jake, who was still in a focused state of mind with the pencil in his mouth and mumbling lyrics softly under his breath. I tried picturing my bubbly Jake writing these agonizing words and miserably failed.

Jake looked up at me as if he could feel my gaze on the back of his head. “I think I’ve found the chorus, but it’s the rest of the song I’m not able to get, and how come it’s so hard to find another word that rhymes with severe? Beer? Sphere? Revere? Appear? Gosh, rhyming sucks some serious ass!”

“This song is beautiful.”

Jake furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “Huh?”

“This song I found in your folder.” I glanced back at it in my hand. “Remember Me.”

Jake’s gaze leaped from my eyes to the sheet, and I felt his body tense. “Where’d you get that from?”

“I was just going through one of your folders. Did you accidentally get it mixed up in your fan folder? Cause this is -”

“Did you read it?” He interrupted.

“Yeah, and it’s perfect.”

Jake glanced at me for a split second before turning back around, obviously uncomfortable. “I was watching one of those Kdramas you love so much and it inspired me. Could you help me rhyme with severe now?”

I knew Jake like the back of my hand, so I knew continuing on with this conversation would get him upset if he’s clearly avoiding it. But, I wasn’t going to just let him off that quickly. “Jake, come on, you can tell me anything. Who is this about?”

Jake looked back at me with a hint of something in his eyes, something I’ve never seen before, and something I wasn't able to decipher. “Nobody, I was just feeling really inspired, that's it.” His tone had switched from calm to agitated.

I give him my I’m-not-stupid look and he comes back with his own you’re-being-delusional stare. “It’s seriously nobody, truthfully and honestly.”

“Okay, okay I’ll back off.” I could tell he was starting to get defensive, and when he got like that, it took him at least a few hours before returning to normal. I watched Jake's Adam's apple move up and down, a way in which I could tell he knew I was not convinced in the slightest. “Well, sometimes we go through things that can remind us of situations like that, but not necessarily in that same exact context, you know? It has to be amplified for that audience appeal.”

“Okay...but have you ever felt this way before? Not exactly like how it’s written, but maybe somewhere along these lines?”

I thought I was going to get another vague answer, or worse, an aggravated one. But instead Jake looked down at his pencil as he tapped it along his wrist. “...maybe, but I think everyone can connect to the words in some way. I mean, everyone feels some kind of heartbreak in their life, right?” Jake's answer was still pretty vague, but at least I was able to get something out of him.

“Okay, but you know you can tell me anything, like, anything ever because you know that you’ll never actually have to feel this way, right?” I said, maybe too much in a hurry.

“Of course I know that.” He replied, giving one of his awkward grins.

“And if anyone has made you feel this way, then you know you can tell me that too cause there a sucker to lose out on a perfect person like you.” I teased in a sing-song way, poking his shoulder hard. Jake chuckled and poked me back.

A weird silence grew in the room, and Jake went back to trying to find rhyming words. I tried getting back on my phone, but I knew I needed to say something to let go of the tenseness in the air.

“Hey, crystal clear rhymes!”

He leaned his head back and looked up at me. “Nevermind, I give up for tonight.”

I could see the stress that played on his face. “Don’t worry, you’ll figure it out.”

“Yeah, but by the time I do, it’ll be too late.”

“What do you mean?”

Jake pulled his knees up to his chest and spoke. “This was going to go on our album comeback that needs to be finished in the next four months. By the time I think of something, it'll be too late and I’ll have to wait until the next four months. But by then, I'll have forgotten. This always happens and I have no idea how the hell to fix it.” I couldn’t tell if he wanted my help or just a bit of comfort.

“Did you try asking the other guys to see if they had any ideas?”

“Yeah, but they’re working on their own parts, I can’t ask them to do this too.”

“I’m sure they’d be willing to help if you asked,” I assured him.

“I know they would, but I just don’t want to. I always ask them for help, I thought being away from the studio and being back home would help my brainstorming abilities.” He gave a weary chuckle that almost sounded like a groan.

“Well, maybe tomorrow will come with better results.” I did my best to give him some motivation, but I could tell I was failing miserably at that too.

Jake watched as a car zoomed past the window, a low bass sounding off as it zoomed away. “I bet it’s easier to just listen to music than to try and come up with it. I remember when I would just blare NCT all day long and jam out in my room. It seemed so much easier back then to come up with stuff than it does now. I miss it.” He took a slight pause before continuing. “ Did you know that song you read was the easiest thing I have written in my life? I remember writing too. I just had this super weird feeling in my chest one day so I basically locked myself in my room and took maybe two hours and just wrote a bunch of words down and connected them to sound like a song. For once my mind had just gone blank and I couldn’t stop thinking and feeling that song, like I knew what it was supposed to sound like, I knew what the lyrics were supposed to mean. I just knew everything. And I miss that feeling, that feeling of like- '' He broke off his sentence when he looked back up to my eyes. It seemed like he was talking more to himself than to me. He swallowed hard and looked back at the pencil still in hand.

“Well, I'm sorry you don’t feel free anymore. I wish there was something I could do to make you feel like that again-”

“No, please don’t feel like that. It’s just something that had just recently started happening, something I really just can’t fix…” His voice gets softer and softer the more he spoke.

“Have you spoken to your manager about it?” I asked. “He’s super nice from what I understand. And he’ll probably have better answers than your friend who can barely play the piano, let alone produce an entire song.”

Jake laughed before I had the chance to. “ See, now you're underestimating yourself. Remember that song from freshman year? The one about-- what was his name, Josh?” Jake teased. I grabbed a pillow and slammed it into the back of his head. “Oh my gosh, I thought we promised we’d never bring it up again!”

Jake chuckled and laid his arm on the couch completely turning towards me. “How about we sneak out and go get ice cream and try to not wake up your mom in the process?”

I suddenly jumped to my feet when I have the perfect idea on how to cheer up the gloomy Mr. Shim. “Or, we could do something even better!”

“Urgh!” Jake groaned.

I grabbed my phone and hooked it up to the speaker. I was going to turn on his hit song Drunk-Dazed as a joke, but Jake needed this break from his career, so instead, I crunk up Beyonce as loud as it could go without disturbing my mom who slept upstairs. I turn back to Jake and reach out for his hands, already moving my hips to the music.

He shook his head and threw it back onto the couch as if throwing a temper tantrum. “I literally dance for a living.”

“Okay but this will be different, I promise.” I grabbed the piles of papers on the ground and threw them in the trash, I then pushed the coffee table near the wall and piled his folders and books neatly on top.

“Come on, cowboy!” I grabbed his hands and helped him up. He was reluctant to get up, but he threw one last groan before standing on his feet.

“This will get the brain juices flowing again!” I told him. I go back to my phone and switch it to one of my favorite Beyonce songs that she covered, At Last.

I sang dramatically to get Jake to smile, and luckily, it worked. I placed both my hands over his shoulders and swayed us back and forth, still miming the song as overly exaggerated as I could. Jake still couldn’t help but smile, and it didn’t take him long to join me in the rhythm and sway naturally with me. I learned at our middle school dance that Jake had perfect rhythm. He was able to impress the rest of the crowd when he busted out moves from BTS. Everyone was impressed, including me.

Now we were on a steady roll. I accidentally stepped on his feet a few times, but it was fine seeing as I was wearing foam flip-flops and he was barefooted. After a while, the song switched and played another of my favorites that didn’t match our style of dance, but we still moved slowly to the beat. Jake tried twirling me, but since I have two left feet, I almost ended up hitting the wall each time and Jake laughed loud at my clumsiness. The moonlight from the kitchen had now switched to the window in the living room. It gleamed through and glistened on Jake like a spotlight, just like the ones on the stage did for him. In a split second, I was reminded that he wouldn’t be here forever, just like he wasn’t here for the past year. I tried to not let it settle on my face that I was scared to see him go again, so I played up on the fun we were having now. Jake looked like he was at ease; finally, since he’d been here, he looked genuinely happy and I wasn’t going to ruin that.

After another handful of songs full of laughs and giggles, we were soon sweating and taking deeper breaths than normal. Each song was different from the one before, but it didn’t stop us from sticking to our style of dance. Even with the simplicity of the moves and the slowness of the steps, I had to take a minute to relax. I hooked my arms around his neck and rested my entire body on his. I could feel Jake’s own sweat seeping through his shirt, But I didn’t mind the wetness that was now attached to my cheek. I thought he would act awkward and ask for me to pull away, but instead, he gripped tighter on my hips and started slowly moving me side to side. I let out a long overdue sigh, trying my best to match the steady breathing of Jake’s with my own. It was actually therapeutic: hearing his heartbeat in one ear and the softness of the music in the other.

I tried to continue our steady breathing together, but his had picked up a bit, almost out of nowhere. I felt the heat of his breath on the nape of my neck, and it made my entire body tingle in a way it never had before. After this sudden feeling, I realized just how close we really were. His leg hair tickled my legs, I could feel the bone of his foot connecting to mine, I could feel his thin waist against mine as well. I felt like I needed to back up, but instead, I couldn’t and continued to sway softly against him. A few seconds later, Jake’s hands rose a little higher, planting themselves on my waist and tightening their grip as if they were trying to pull me closer than we already were.

The sensation hadn’t stopped though, it clung to my body like my damp shorts did on my thighs. Sooner or later I felt pressure on the lower part of my stomach and thought for sure that Jake was messing around and wasn’t feeling what I was, which indicated that I needed to pull back before this feeling became too much.

This is so embarrassing. I thought. How could I let myself feel like this? How was this in any way okay? I finally pulled back, the sensation becoming too unbearable, and glanced up at his face. His pupils were large in a way I hadn’t seen before. His mouth was slightly open and a drop of sweat slowly traced down his forehead, onto his nose. That pressure I was feeling on my stomach had now doubled in force, and Jake's face had switched from calm and subtle, to alarmed and panicked...

————✧————

(part 2 possibly...?)

Thank you guys so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! Please, leave any constructive criticism you have on helping improve my writing!

————✧————

None of the images are mine, They all belong to their rightful owners :)

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raggaraddy · 3 years ago

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Can you please do a yandere hyung line reaction to MC being jealous and tries to hide it ( For jin could you please make it as his wife has come back for a short holiday or something)

A/N: My brain did not want to do the writing thing the last couple of days, but I got there. I think these stories are good? but somehow they all ended up a bit soft. I hope you like them though 🤞 because it was a great request! Thank you 💜💜💜

@blacksnow160

Summary: Hyung line reaction when you get jealous.

Trigger warning: Smut, violence, blood-drinking, murder, abuse, yandere themes.

Alpha! Namjoon

Normally you didn't consider yourself clingy. You enjoyed your personal space and your time alone. But at the same time, you've also become accustomed to Namjoon dropping everything to take care of you. This entire week though, he's been preoccupied with a territorial issue, and the last 3 nights he hasn't even come to bed.

Leaving you feeling a little discarded, to say the least.

Nevertheless, you're a mature adult, and you were able to let it go with the knowledge that Namjoon is an Alpha who has responsibilities and knowing that he would still rather be with you.

It is, however, a comfort that you have trouble holding on to whenever you see the new girl around him. It's not like you're jealous. It's just that she doesn't seem to know how to behave respectfully or appropriately around Namjoon. She always stands too close or looks at him a bit too much, and she's way too touchy. Only his elbow, arm, or shoulder. But it's like, get your fucking hands off him.

Rationally, you know Joon is your mate and you own his heart, mind, and body. Still, it doesn't stop you from tossing restlessly, laying in bed at 2 am, once again alone. The two things added together making you feeling sour. Feeling sick of being sent away while this other girl gets to stick around being way too familiar with your Boyfriend.

Coming downstairs in your pyjamas, you weave in among the wolves working your way to Namjoon. Standing at the dining table, looking over a mess of paper, he notices you right away a small smile lifting the corners of his mouth.

"Y/n, what are you doing up?"He asks, checking his watch.

There she is again, right next to him. Her hand casually coming off his shoulder when she sees you.

"It's late. Go back to bed, Beautiful." he coos.

You ignore his instruction. Wrapping to his side by pushing yourself between him and this girl, creating space for yourself with a not-so-subtle shoving of your elbow into her arm. Smiling up at him sweetly as he accepts your presence, hugging you tightly.

"We're going to be busy most of the night. You should go to bed." he leans down to whisper, his breath tickling your ear. He's trying not to draw the focus from the rest of the table into your personal discussion.

"I'll go up when you come with me." You whisper back.

"It's going to be a few more hours still baby." He sighs, seeming frustrated with the circumstances.

"Then I'm staying here."

"You shouldn't-"

"Don't argue with me Kim Namjoon. You're not going to win this one." While it's said in jest, you also mean it. He'll have to drag you upstairs to make you go. And if he steps foot in that bedroom, you both know you'll be able to make him stay.

"Oh really?" He challenges, fighting the smile growing on his face, not wanting to encourage your mischievous behaviour.

Grabbing the collar of his black tee, you pull him down to your height, smacking your lips against his. Kissing him passionately and longingly. Something you haven't been able to do for nearly a full week.

Letting his shirt go, his smile is fully grown. His dimples on display.

"Really." You finalize, looking up at him coquettishly.

You can see the struggle playing in his mind. He's extremely tempted to throw you over his shoulder and take you upstairs right now, his wolf fighting to shirk his responsibilities and give in to desire. His chest rumbling lowly as he winks down at you.

"Okay baby." his fingers dig into your hips, "If you're gonna play dirty, you can stay." He teases with a chuckle. Resisting the bait.

Feeling calmed and relaxed on the warmth of his hold again, a smug sense of pride fills your chest. From the corner of your eye, you can see her attention on the two of you. Your ego is not able to resist, and you shoot a cold pointed glare at her. A smirk creeping onto your face as she looks down, avoiding your eye line.

"Seeing as it's late, do you wanna make coffee for everyone?" You order her in the form of a question, speaking loudly enough for both her and Namjoon to hear your sassy, obvious tone.

She looks a little stunned. She'd just been promoted to the inner circle for this problem-solving session, and she doesn't seem pleased at being asked to perform menial tasks. Trying to go over your head, she looks at the Alpha for confirmation. But he doesn't give it to her. Instead, you can feel him nod, supporting your order. A full smile filling your face as you get his backing.

"Of course, Luna." she obeys, looking a little dejected.

"Thank you." you shoo her to action with a sing-song voice. Curling into Namjoons side, you can't help but feel authoritative. And a little bit victorious.

King! Seokjin

It had been nearly two weeks since you had seen Jin last. As frustrating as it was, you were genuinely missing him. There was a kind of energy he had when it was just the two of you. Something that filled you, and without him you were feeling like your own spirit was draining away.

It would be okay though, today Jin was coming back from visiting his wife and children. You're sure he missed you just as much as you missed him. That he was as excited to see you, as you were to see him. You were a little worried knowing that you would have to satisfy his sadism first, but you can tolerate it, thinking that at least you'll get to see his smile.

As the day is drawing to an end, you've finished all your tasks but you refuse to retire for the night, certain the King is going to call for you at any minute. Feeling a mix of excitement and relief when the staff manager comes to collect you.

Nearly skipping you rush to the dining hall, having been instructed to serve dinner to the King and his guest. Working with another maid to bring the meals from the kitchen.

Walking in, the smile you were trying to conceal disappears completely. Your stomach dropping. Jin's guest is the Princess. His wife.

You have to control your expression to hide your distress, feeling sick while serving him. His wife never comes down. She hasn't in a year and a half. Jin doesn't even really like her. It doesn't make sense why she's here.

With a curt bow, you remove the closh and place the plate down. Meeting the King's eye for a moment, you do your best to placify your appearance. Your efforts cracking when you see his lips pulling ever so slightly into a knowing smile.

He dismisses the other maid, but not you. Sending you to the waiting station by the wall. You're stuck watching over their conversation. Feeling more and more insecure as you look at the Princess's regality and beauty. Getting more frustrated as your mind runs rampant.

How long is she going to stay? It doesn't seem like they brought the Princes, so she has to go back soon. And what kind of mother leaves her children alone? It doesn't even matter that she's here, you know Jin likes you more. So what if she is really pretty, he can't hurt her like he can you. You make him happy. She's just a prop he was given to secure a treaty. He actually chose you.

Slowly, you're building yourself into a craze. Making yourself feel sad until the very end of the meal. Finally, their dinner date ends and he stands, kindly bowing to see her off. Leaving only you and him in the hall.

Relaxing back in his seat, he finishes the remainder of his drink.

"Y/n." Holding his empty glass to the side, he calls you over. You follow his gesture and top up his cup. Avoiding looking directly at him again. Pacing back to your place when he stops you.

"Come here." He grins, enjoying how uncomfortable you are. "You met my wife today." He pushes the difficult topic, again probing for your reaction.

Nodding softly, you're trying to not let your bitterness out. You know Jin doesn't like it when you pout.

"Are you jealous Princess?" He holds his hand out for you to take, leading you closer to him. Leaning back to create a space for you on his lap. Guiding you over him with your legs spread.

"No, your Majesty." You shake your head, your pause and hesitation giving away the truth.

Jin's gentle touch comes off your hand, his grip instead ripping back your hair, arching your back and nearly yanking you off of his lap. Biting back a shriek, you can't keep entirely quiet, whimpering as his fist curls tighter and closer to your scalp.

"Are you lying to me?" His mouth latches onto your shoulder, biting into your muscle vindictively. Unbridling that scream you had tried to smother.

"Yes. I'm sorry your Majesty!" you cry out, tears building in your eyes. "I'm jealous. I missed you. I want you-" all the truth is pouring out, but you hesitate worried you're being too bold, "all to myself."

His grip comes out of your hair. His hand instead raking down your chest, leaving painful red marks as each nail digs along the skin. Continuing lower, tearing the buttons on your dress. Yanking down your bra also, exposing your breasts. His other hand hikes the fabric up around your thighs, stopping on your waist, lowering your hips into him.

Pinching your nipple, he draws you closer until his lips are just off yours. Gasping through the initial pain, you can only whine and bite your lip to further keep quiet.

"Go on Princess. Prove to me why I should have missed you."

Assassin! Yoongi

Over the past couple of weeks, Yoongi would be gone for days at a time. Coming back in a strangely talkative and happy mood. You were as miserable and depressed as always, but his vigour was somehow revitalizing and comforting. It made him easier to deal with. It made him less moody. And it made your life easier. So to begin with you were very happy that he was happy.

That was until he mentioned a name in passing. A woman's name. Someone he was working with on a project.

As soon as you heard him talking positively about her, a pang of anxiety spiked through your stomach. From then on it rested in your gut, making you irritated, uncomfortable, and flustered every time you heard about or thought about her.

It was the strangest thing. You hated Yoongi, you're sure of it. But he was all you had. And hearing him talk about another woman, even though it sounded platonic, the adoration in his voice was hurting you in a way you never expected.

Slowly you had to work through this feeling on your own. You couldn't bear to let Yoongi know, not certain what he would do with the information that you were, in lack of a better word, jealous.

The more you heard about this woman, you knew you could never be as impressive as her. Every detail sounding equally terrifying and awe-inspiring. To be honest the specifics slipped your mind, as you were mostly wrapped up in self-pity when Yoongi spoke about her.

All you know is that you felt inferior, and you were craving, longing to feel that kind of importance to Yoongi, also. Resenting the fact that this other person was so easily able to bring joy and energy out of him.

Over the next couple of weeks, you spent every waking moment thinking about how to make Yoongi happy. Not just avoiding annoying him, like you usually did, but instead thinking about how to bring him genuine enjoyment.

One time you spent hours making him a meal. Making something you knew he would love. But, unfortunately, he only complained about the mess. He said he wasn't hungry and left you to throw the food away and clean up.

Another time, you had planned a full evening of activities. Movies, snacks, games that would help you get to know each other better, anything fun you could organize with your limited resources. Only, he wasn't in the mood to play, or talk. He only wanted one thing, and when he was done, he left you alone in your room, feeling used and a bit sore.

However, that gave you an idea. Maybe you could connect with him physically first. Then that might give you a way for something, anything more to develop.

This time, you set the house up with candles, music, wine, chocolate strawberries, everything you'd seen in movies. Waiting for him on the couch in something a little provocative. But, as soon as he comes in from the garage he looks more annoyed than impressed. Rolling his eyes, ordering you to your room.

By this stage it's late, you're tired, and you're losing your mind trying to make him happy. You were fighting so hard for his attention, and he was barely tolerating you. You aren't thinking clearly as you snap at him.

"Why?!" You yell, stomping your foot down. "I'm working so hard and you're just being an asshole!"

The words come out and you instantly regret them. His straight expression hardening.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." You rush to him, wrapping your arms around his chest trying to soothe any reaction. "Just tell me what I can do." You plead. Exasperated by so many failed attempts.

"That depends. What do you want?" He honestly questions, looking down at you.

You weren't exactly prepared to answer this question. You're not sure you really know.

"I'm your's right?" you say with big eyes, your voice coming out so softly, feeling embarrassed even though you're mimicking his words. "I get that I have to be yours. But then you have to be mine too." Your voice trembles.

Finally, it makes sense to Yoongi. Your change in demeanour, and in behaviour. Why you've been so needy. Why you've been trying to get his attention. He understands now. And that was most of what was annoying him. Not knowing why you were acting differently.

He steps out of your grasp, calling for you to follow him upstairs. You're not so nervous as you do. Surprisingly, the revelation has given Yoongi has a warm smile.

Falling back onto his bed, he taps the space beside him, inviting you to join him. You climb into the middle of the bed, resting in the place he set for you, his arm laid out under your head. He curls into you, gently wrapping his arm over your waist. Hugging you.

For the first time ever, he is showing you some kind of affection. For the first time, he's actually making a gesture of warmth and comfort. You couldn't even let yourself think that Yoongi could be capable of this. Having spent so many months isolated and alone. Even when you weren't locked up.

Hating yourself for not being stronger, you break into silent tears. Biting your thumb to stifle any sobs.

While reason is battling in your head, telling you that it's a bad idea to form any kind of emotional attachment to him, you don't want to listen to logic right now. Letting yourself cling to Yoongi and the desperately needed human connection.

Vampire! Hoseok

There was a delicate balance to your relationship with Hoseok. You couldn't exactly rely on his moods to be stable, but you could rely on his obsession with you. It was the only thing that kept you feeling secure. Feeling certain that when he bit you next he wouldn't let you bleed out. Or that when he hit you or cut you or hurt you, that he wasn't going to leave you to suffer in agony but would heal you. Because he wanted to keep you. You were his.

It was a twisted kind of reassurance. But it's what you had, so it's what you worked with.

You knew the source of his obsession. It was you as a person, sure. But you weren't kidding yourself. Mostly, his infatuation was with your blood. Hoseok wasn't specific about it, but you had overheard some of the other Vampires discussing you. Apparently, you smell delicious, and that's why he never lets you wander the house with any cuts. That's why you were locked away every 28 days. And that's why you were his only.

It didn't make sense to you, there was nothing different about you.

But somehow you'd fallen in and become the star of your very own YA horror story.

Whatever the cause though, you were aware that Hoseok's addiction to your blood was the reason that he kept you. Without that, he might simply kill you, or worse, he might throw you to one of the other bloodsuckers who look at you like a happy meal they want to fuck.

Which is probably why you were so defensive when you saw him biting another girl.

Sitting on the back terrace looking over the gated property, Hoseok and a few of his creations were sitting in the moonlight enjoying a drink. You'd come downstairs expecting to be his refill when you see him sinking his fangs into the arm of one of the human pets.

Frustration floods through your body, a new kind of anger making your hands shake. A malicious and honestly, not-all-together thought out idea springs into your head. You've never seen him drink from anyone else before, and you need to remind him that he should only want you.

Taking a serrated peeler from the bar at the side of the terrace, you hold it concealed in your palm, going up to the first Vampire leaning there.

"Are you thirsty?" you ask, speaking lowly. He, like all the others, know you're Hoseok's, and so he rightfully looks uncomfortable being near you. Stepping into his personal space, you raise your arm under his chin and run the sharp blade across the top of your forearm. His eyes immediately going black, his fangs bared. Unable to resist what you're offering.

Behind you, every single one of them turns their heads, smelling you the second blood gathers on your skin.

In a flash, Hoseok is between the two of you. Ripping his teeth into the guy's neck, tearing his throat out. Killing him in an instant.

Breathing heavily, he turns to you with blood washed down his front. His eyes murderous and cold.

Retaliating, you storm towards the human-pet and shove her with all of your might, pushing her down the stone tile steps onto the grass. Watching her tumble into a heap.

Those around you have gone dead quiet, none of them even daring to look directly at either of you.

"How dare you?" He seethes, stalking towards you. But you're not backing down. You know better than to retreat from him when he charges.

"How dare I?" you scream. "How dare you drink from that skank!" An enraged Hoseok is something all of his offspring know to fear. Steadily you can see them clearing the space around the two of you. Withdrawing from whatever this is leading to.

"You want to tell me who I can eat?!" He growls, his hand shooting around your neck, holding you but not choking you. "You're a blood bag that I keep as a toy!"

"If that's all, then I'll let all of them feed on me too."

His hand constricts, restricting your air. "I'll kill anyone that tries."

"Then," you gasp, your words coming out short. "only me." you pull your hair off your shoulder, turning your neck as far to the side as you can. Throwing his head back, he takes the invitation, sinking his fangs into your jugular, swallowing down mouthfuls of your blood.

Holding onto his shoulders, you jump up wrapping your legs around his waist, pushing yourself closer to his mouth. Hoseok's arms wrapping around your ass, keeping you up.

Pushed back by your momentum, he stumbles a few steps, dropping down onto the open sofa chair. You landing on his lap, straddling his thighs.

As more of your blood is drained, and you get lightheaded, the pain starts to slip and your body starts to float. A euphoric sensation, akin to being high consuming you.

You tangle your hands up into his hair tugging it, massaging his scalp. You've become so accustomed to him fucking you when he feeds from you, that whenever he bites you, you get turned on. Your body reacting out of instinct. Slowly grinding down, rocking your hips into him as you start to get him hard. The friction feeling good making you moan. Making you move faster with pleasure tingling through your core also.

"Hobi," you moan. Shivering, as his tongue runs up your wounds.

Your gentle whine catches his attention. A surprised expression on his face that shifts into a smile as he leans back to watch you. His focus on you making you feel slightly embarrassed, slowing your motions until they stop altogether.

Biting his tongue, your eyes meet for a moment before he kisses his blood into your mouth, the copper taste feeling soothing and familiar. Your body relaxing completely knowing you'll wake up healed.

"Mine." He whispers into your lips.

The blood loss pulls you into unconsciousness, your head dropping onto his shoulder. The euphoric feeling swallowing you up as you purr back. "Mine."

454 notes · View notes

the-bau-quinjet · 4 years ago

Text

Tolerate It

Summary: Reader struggles with feeling like Hotch is growing distant.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x gn!Reader

Category: fluff/angst

Warnings: the reader has thoughts/feelings of inadequacy

Word Count: 3200+

Notes: This is my entry for @railmereid‘s 2k writing challenge! It was inspired by Taylor Swift’s song tolerate it! I think there’s only one direct quote (I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life).

You met Aaron on accident. It could be said that a lot of people are met on accident, and that’s just how people meet other people. But with Aaron it felt different. It felt as though every little thing that went wrong that day lead you to the accident that would introduce Aaron Hotchner into your life.

After the shit show that was today, all you want to do is get home and sleep. Maybe also eat dinner, but honestly even food is on the backburner of your mind right now.

Your drive home from work was the first uneventful thing to happen all day, a necessary moment of peace. You made it into your apartment without any trouble, swiftly moving to change into your fluffiest pajamas and sleep.

The second your head hit your pillow, the fire alarm sounded. The blaring alarm screeched in your ears as you groaned. You forced yourself out of bed to comply with the alarm. Without thinking, you put on your slippers, grabbed your keys, and walked out the front door.

Once you made it to the street, you turned to see the building really was on fire. It looked contained to one patio, but it was big enough for you to give up your plans of sleep. Instead, you chose to turn on your heel and walk down the street to escape the crowd.

You didn’t have a plan as to where you were going. You just wanted it to be quiet. Before long, you found yourself in a park. Looking around, you spotted an empty bench. Perfect. You can just sit, enjoy the quiet of the park for however long it takes to fix the fire issue.

You start trekking toward the bench, now walking with a purpose, when you notice a man chasing his child. The child laughs loudly, joy so clear on his face. The man smiles at him, still running behind him.

His smile is so infectious, it has its own magnetic force pulling you towards him. Switching directions from the bench, you are now walking toward the grassy area they are playing in, not looking at your surroundings. You’re so captivated by the happiness on display in front of you, you don’t notice the change in terrain.

You end up tripping on a rock, falling and tumbling down the slight decline to land in a heap at the feet of the very man whose smile distracted you.

To make matters worse, he was not stationary. No, that would have been to simple. He was, in fact, still chasing the child. So, rather than rolling to a stop and looking up at him, you rolled right into him, causing him to lose his balance and fall over you.

The two of you were a tangled mess of limbs piled on top of each other. Slowly, carefully the two of you separated, gingerly moving arms and legs to avoid further injury. Helping each other rise from the ground, you were both speechless, equal parts amused and horrified at what just happened.

“Are you okay?”

You jumped at the sudden intrusion that brought you back to reality. Spinning around, you realized it was the child.

It took you an embarrassing amount of time to form a response. “Oh, um... yes I’m okay. Thank you.” Turning back to the man, you finally realized what just happened. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry! Are you okay?”

He chuckled, a small smirk appearing on his face before he replied, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Oh, good.” Your relief was short lived as you realized what you were wearing and how you were dressed. “Please tell me you didn’t see me roll all the way down the hill?” You cringed at the thought.

“I could say it, but it wouldn’t be very honest.” Again, a small laugh left his lips.

“Do you think we could pretend?” You took a deep breath as he quirked his eyebrow. “Ya know, that I didn’t just make a complete fool of myself?”

“But that’s not true! Daddy said when something’s not true it’s a lie and lies are bad.” The boy chimed in again, earning a chuckle from both adults. You bent down to talk to him.

“You are absolutely right, lying is bad.” You nodded along with him, matching his serious expression.

He took in your expression, as if judging the sincerity of your statement. Slowly, a smile began to form as if he was glad you agreed with him. “Do you want to play tag with us?”

Looking from him to his father, you took the slight smile and nod of his head as an invitation to accept his offer. “I would love to.”

That series of accidents led you to where you are now, though. A year and a half later you are sitting in your shared home, watching Aaron Hotchner do paperwork for what feels like the millionth night in a row. More realistically, it is the ninth night in a row, but you’re feeling lonely and dramatic. Those nine nights have been spread out over the past month, interrupted by nights he spends away from home.

You yearn to be closer to him. All it would take is for you to cross the room, but it feels as though the distance from the couch you are lounging on to the desk he is working at is too far, like there is some impassible divide preventing you from interrupting him.

So you just keep watching. It has been 36 minutes since you started your observing. If he sticks to his pattern, he’ll pause in nine minutes to stretch, giving him the opportunity to notice your eyes on him. You’re hopeful that this time he’ll smile when he sees you.

So you wait. You watch him read. You notice the way his head dips just a bit lower as he tries to focus tired eyes on the smudged handwriting of a fellow agent. You notice how his hand squeezes the pen tighter than before, turning the once smooth glide of ink across the page into rushed, jagged strokes of letters. You notice the barely there wince as he flips the page, the result of the familiar feeling of a paper cut he’s grown all too used to. You notice everything he does. Which is why you’re not surprised when he speaks.

“You’re staring.”

Glancing at your phone, you note the time. Nine minutes later. Right on schedule. The smile you hoped for is noticeably missing, replaced by a curious tilt of his head.

“I’m basking in your presence.”

If he wanted to, he could figure out how lonely and dramatic you are feeling. But with the majority of his energy still directed towards the many reports on his desk, he only notices the surface level. Tired, slightly miffed, but enjoying that he is home.

There was once a time when he would have noticed it all though. A time when he noticed everything about you, sometimes before you had even noticed it about yourself. You’ve learned how to hide it though, to save him the energy that would be expended to profile you.

“You should consider a new career path. Comedy could really be for you.”

His deadpan joke doesn’t surprise you, but him rising from his desk chair does. For a minute, you expect him to come to you. To attempt to cross the impassible divide you’ve built in your head. Instead, he turns into the kitchen. He pauses at the island, drinking from the glass he never brings to his desk to prevent anything from ruining his files.

When he returns to his desk, squandering any lingering hope that he may have been done for the night, you rise. Unwilling to do what you had hoped of him, you turn away from his desk and move toward the stairs. Just before you lose sight of him, you turn back.

“Don’t forget to sleep tonight.”

Your tone is soft, emphasizing your concern to cover up the lingering loneliness.

“I’ll be up soon.”

You respond with a slight nod of your head, another thing unnoticed by Aaron as his eyes never left the files.

You flitter through the second level as you complete your routine to prepare yourself to sleep for the night.

You can’t help but notice the cold sheets on the empty side of the bed as you wait for Aaron, knowing you’ll likely be asleep before he comes to bed.

You’re surprised to wake up the next morning with Aaron still in bed next to you. You watch his chest rise and fall with the steady in and out of his breath. His face is fully relaxed, a sight you so rarely get to see.

You’re not sure how long you watch him sleep, but you notice when his rhythmic breathing changes pattern indicating he’s waking up. His eyes flutter open slowly, allowing you to see the exact moment he notices you.

“You’re staring again.”

The smile you are still hoping for is again absent from his face, too used to the frown that has taken over his features near permanently for the past month.

“I’m still basking in your presence.”

You notice the beginnings of a grin forming on his face. The twinkle in his eyes. The slight twitch of his lips. It’s nearly there when the moment is interrupted by the distinct, shrill ringtone indicating a call from the bureau.

You watch as he sits up to answer the phone with his typical “Hotchner”. If you hadn’t spent the last year noticing everything you could about the man, you would doubt that he had been asleep less than three minutes ago.

His brows furrow, his body leaning forward to sit a little straighter as he takes in the information from whoever is on the other end of the phone. His eyes trace the pattern of your comforter, up until he throws the blanket off of himself to rise to his feet. He’s changing into his suit before hanging up. Without even hearing his responses, you can tell where this is headed.

After he hangs up, you speak before he has the chance.

“I take it you won’t be here for dinner with my parents tonight? I’ll try to reschedule it.”

The question should express your loneliness, but you do well to hide the full truth. It’s easy to sound understanding because you are. You do understand, which is why you never plan to tell him how you feel.

The grim expression is enough for you to know you’re right, you don’t need the verbal confirmation. You nod your head, a smile on your face that doesn’t meet your eyes as he walks out of your bedroom.

While Aaron was away, you did everything you could to keep yourself busy outside of your typical 9 to 5 workday. Aside from the typical reading, cleaning, and TV watching you normally do you; you successfully navigated another conversation with your parents about why it was necessary to reschedule dinner a second time and played action figures with Jack, always in agreement about how his daddy is a hero.

Every night you found yourself staring at the door, hoping it would swing open and reveal him on the other side. Every night you grew less hopeful and more discouraged than the one previous.

Five days after he left, Aaron returned to your shared home. Despite the late hour, you waited for him on the couch. Knowing he probably hadn’t eaten dinner, you kept some food warm for him.

When the door swung open, you were in front of it in seconds. You pulled him into a hug, one he was too exhausted to reciprocate, and kissed his cheek.

Moving farther into the house, he dropped his files on his desk swiftly turning to head upstairs.

“I kept dinner warm for you.”

Your words stalled him at the bottom of the stairs. He turned around slowly, barely looking at you.

“I actually ate with the team tonight.”

His words hit you like a bus, but you turned to hide it. He didn’t eat with the team often, so you never blamed him when he stayed with them a bit longer than usual.

“Oh, okay. I’ll just put it in a container for tomorrow then. Did you want to talk about the case?”

You’ve always been willing to help him carry the weight of his job, but you’ve been trying harder to get him to open up this past month. Typically he brushes you off, tells you he’s fine, and then buries himself in paperwork.

He surprised you this time. Maybe he could tell you were upset, or maybe he was just too far in his head. Either way, rather than continuing on his path up the stairs, he moved to sit in the kitchen while you put the food away.

You listened as he ranted about the local officers withholding information about the case. You listened as he complained about the poor weather. You listened to every word, slowly washing and drying the dishes until they were sparkling. You listened until you were practically asleep, leaning against the sink. You didn’t dare to interrupt in fear he would shut down again. Or maybe it was you shutting down, but that’s a thought for another time.

When he finished talking, he rose from his chair, too worked up to sleep now, he sat down at his desk.

You watched, noticing everything you could.

Your weeks repeated much the same for the next few months. Your loneliness morphed into something new with each night you spent watching Aaron work.

It’s one such night when everything changes. You were trying to watch him work, but your thoughts drifted away from his actions as you lost yourself in your memories.

The first case Aaron went on after you moved in with him and Jack was the hardest for you. After a straight week of seeing him so often around the house, it felt like a slap in the face to come home and not have him there. Somehow you made it through, and you were clingier than usual when he came home.

He noticed how it affected you. That was before you started hiding your feelings from him. He told you he thought about you in every spare moment. That he wanted to solve the case even more than usual just so he could come home to see you even just a few minutes sooner.

He calmed all of your fears, protecting you from your own intrusive thoughts about holding him back when he was working.

You couldn’t help but think about every time he recognized how you were feeling and did what he could to help. How he would reassure you that he wanted to be with you, bringing you little key chains or stuffed animals from the cities he travelled to. How he would smile when he saw you. Where was that man now?

You thought back to the first day you met Aaron. It was like he saved you from a terrible day, bringing a smile to your face after hours upon hours of crap.

“Do you think we could pretend?” You laugh lightly to yourself at the memory of Jack telling you not to lie. Not realizing you spoke the words out loud, you’re surprised to hear Aaron from across the room.

“Pretend what?” The confusion is clear in his voice and the furrow of his brows.

“Hmm? Oh, um. I was just thinking about the first day we met.” Tears begin to brim your eyes as you think about how much everything has seemed to change. “And how you became my whole world and now I feel like I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life.” The tears are now freely falling down your face.

Aaron looks even more confused now. “What?” He’s frozen at his desk, pen in hand, reports on the surface in front of him.

“I’m so sorry. I just feel like I’m taking up so much of your time and you have such important things to do! God, I’m so selfish. I’ve tried so hard to hide it though, so you can focus on people who actually need your help.” The panic in your voice grows as you speak, along with the tears falling from your eyes.

“Y/N...” Suddenly, Aaron is on his feet, easily crossing the imaginary divide you’ve built in between the couch and his desk. He slows down, moving gently as he pulls you into him on the couch, moving your legs across his lap so he could pull you into his chest. “Sweetheart, you could never take up too much of my time.” He speaks slowly, so as not to start another round of sobbing.

“What?” Your confusion is clearly communicated with the one word question, but you’re on a roll with your feelings so why stop now. “Are you saying it’s all in my head? Bu-, but, but you’ve been so busy every time you’ve been home! I’ve barely seen you, and I’ve tried so hard to not let it bother me because I know how important what you do is! I do, I understand it all so much. I could never be mad at you for working so hard. I just feel like you’re tolerating me being here when you have so many more important things to do.”

Now breathless, your rant ends with more tears forming in your eyes. Aaron is quick to wipe them away as they fall. “You’re right. I have been busy.” His voice is full of concern and regret as he thinks about the past few months. “But please don’t ever doubt for a second that you are the most important thing in the world to me.” He pauses for a second before continuing. “Well, other than Jack.” This earns him a slight chuckle from you before you reply.

“Jack is the most important to me too.” Your clear your throat, hesitant to voice your next question. “You’re not mad at me?”

Aaron looks so taken aback, you would laugh if you weren’t so nervous. “I could never be mad at you. Especially not for having completely valid feelings. I’m so sorry I haven’t been as present as I should’ve been. I love you so much, Y/N. More than I could ever put into words, and I will be doing a better job of showing you just how much you mean to me from now on.” There’s a slight edge to his voice, as though he’s annoyed with himself for you feeling this way. “Please, don’t ever hide your feelings from me. I never want to lose you.” His own voice is cracking, slight tears in his eyes at the idea of you not being in his life.

“I promise.” You lean up to kiss him, trying to convey just how much you’ve missed him.

“Let’s go to bed.” He lifts you up from the couch, carrying you toward the stairs.

You shriek, clinging to him even more. “It’s only 9:15!” You laugh at his antics. “What about your reports?”

“I have more important things to do right now.” He smirks at you, quickly moving into the bedroom to show you just how much he cares about you.

permanent tag list:

@mac99martin @goldeng1rl8 @measure-in-pain

#renswritingchallenge #aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotchner angst #aaron hotchner fluff #Criminal Minds #criminal minds x reader #hotch x reader

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cjsinkythoughts · 4 years ago

Text

FATWS One Shot #1 - Back to the Beginning

Word Count: 1644

Warnings: Cursing, Mentions of Intoxicated Automobile Accident, Steve Being a Slight Puppy

Setting/Characters: Directly after Captain America: The First Avenger, New York City; Reader, Director Nicholas Fury, Captain Steven Rogers

A/N: Here it is! The first One Shot that goes along with my FATWS Series! Keep in mind; it doesn’t take place during FATWS. There are NO SPOILERS in this and there will be NO SPOILERS in any of the One Shots. I do recommend still reading the Series, though, to understand the Reader more. These are more like…prequels to the Series. And it won’t be a series. It’ll just be a collection of One Shots based on what I think is important and what you guys wanna see. I also WON’T BE DOING A TAGLIST FOR ONE SHOTS! (Only those in my All Works Taglist will be tagged!) I’ll be adding them to my FATWS Series Masterlist under a ‘One Shot’ section, so you’ll be able to find them there, and I’ll also be tagging them with #fatws series oneshots. Feel free to send in requests for what you wanna see. I’ve gotten a few already, so I’ll be writing those tomorrow. I’ll say that they’ll all be shorter like this one, but...knowing me...we’ll see.

(Also, I’m aware of the theories that SHIELD chose the woman because the resemblance to Peggy, but just ignore that for this.)

As always, not beta’d so please excuse mistakes! Be kind to yourselves and each other! Enjoy and stay tuned!

FATWS Masterlist

cjsinkythoughts Masterlist

You knew. You knew the moment his eyes raked over your form. You knew when he looked over his shoulder at the radio playing some baseball game from 1941. You had done your homework, just like you did with every mission you worked. Granted, this one was a little different, but when Fury called you in personally, you couldn’t say no. You told them your uniform was wrong. You told them the game was too close to when he went under. You told them.

So you weren’t surprised in the least when he smashed through the wall, running out of the room. You didn’t necessarily regret pushing the button; you did it because you knew your cover had been blown, not because you were threatened. But you regretted calling out Code 13, not realizing that they’d chase him out into the middle of Times Square of all places.

Before you could head outside, wanting to know what happened, Fury’s name flashed across your vibrating phone.

“Y/L/N.”

“We’re heading back.”

An eyebrow raised, showing your confusion. “That was quick.”

“He’s fine, if you’re insinuating what I think you are.”

“I’m not insinuating anything, sir.” It was a lie, of course. You wouldn’t put it past Fury to slow down the Captain anyway he could, especially if the Man Out of Time was putting up a fight. “Sir, with all due respect, I tried-”

“I know, Agent. When We get back, we’ll set up in Conference Room C. I want you to join us.”

Your eyes narrowed, free hand on your hip. “You only called me in to ease him into this whole new century thing-”

“And he’s not eased.”

“It’s not my fault, Fury. I told your guys that it was wrong-”

“I know, Agent. Introducing him to the new century obviously went less smoothly than we anticipated.”

“Ya think?”

“Conference Room-”

“C. I heard you the first time. I’ll be there. Give me a few minutes.” He hung up without any farewells, making you roll your eyes. The director had pulled you off an assignment - in the middle of it - and promised you could get back to it once you finished helping him with the Star Spangled Man problem; help Captain Rogers integrate into the new times. But it was starting to seem that Fury didn’t just mean when he woke up.

You quickly changed, switching the old fashioned uniform for the tighter SHIELD-assigned one, before heading up to the level with all the conference rooms. You understood doing this in New York instead of the HQ in DC - the captain was from New York and, as much as it changed, some things would be familiar - and you definitely understood not doing this on the Helicarrier since Rogers didn’t even know about smartphones yet. And you definitely weren’t complaining; you had an apartment here in the City that you hadn’t slept in for months now.

Glancing at the room plaques, you paused in front of ‘C’. You took a couple breaths, relaxing yourself just as you did before any mission, before opening the door and stepping in.

Fury and Rogers were sitting at the table on opposite ends, the blonde looking around warily, eyeing the few agents lining the walls. You shot Fury a look, disapproving of the firepower in the room.

“Captain. Director.” You nodded to them in greeting.

Roger’s eyes snapped towards you, recognition lighting up his features. “You-”

“Agent Y/N Y/L/N. Sorry about the act.”

He nodded hesitantly, watching you as you sat down a couple seats from Fury. “I have some other business to attend to, so I’ll make this quick. To help you adjust, it’s been decided to assign an agent to help you for the next few months. Agent Y/L/N, here, will take that position.”

You blinked, turning to Fury, not expecting that. “What?”

Fury ignored you, standing up and setting down a file on the table in front of you when he passed. “The file has what you need to explain to him. Start now.”

“Fury.” You snapped, eyebrows furrowing as you stared at the file. Looking back as the door opened, you scrambled to stand when you realized he was leaving. “Fury! Excuse me.” You pardoned yourself from the captain, chasing after the director without waiting for his reaction. “Nicholas!”

That got his attention, his stride pausing. He spun on his heel, an eyebrow quirked. “Agent-”

“You didn’t mention anything about months helping him. I thought you meant, at most, a week!”

He crossed his arms tightly across his chest. “You’re the first person he saw when he woke up. You’re the best option.”

“First off,” you mimicked his position, popping your hip for good measure. “Even though I was the first person he saw, I deceived him. Why would he trust me? Second, why me? I understand having me for the little show you put on. I get that. But me? Of all people? You know I don’t do personal stuff.”

Fury narrowed his eyes. “You’re on this, and that’s final. He needs to know politics and technology. Settle him into the apartment in the file.”

You gaped as he turned around and started towards the elevators at the end of the hallway. “What about-?!”

“Your mission is being taken care of!” He called over his shoulder. “Politics and technology!”

You huffed, stomping your foot, frustrated, well aware of the fact that you were throwing a mini tantrum. You worked behind the scenes, acting as someone other than yourself. You didn’t help 93 year old super soldiers settle into new houses, teach them about current politics, and explain what cell phones were.

Walking back into the conference room, you found it empty besides Rogers, who was looking through the file, eyebrows knit in confusion. “Sorry about that.” You apologized, moving around the table to plop into the seat next to him.

He gave a half hearted shrug, glancing over at you. “It’s okay. He didn’t tell you the plan. I don’t blame you for being annoyed.”

“Yeah…it’s nothing personal. I’m not annoyed at you, and it’s not because of you. It’s just-”

“You don’t do personal stuff.” At your quirked eyebrow, he tapped his ear. “I could hear you.”

You cleared your throat, feeling slightly embarrassed at being heard. “Oh. Right. Enhanced hearing. Um, so, I guess you’re already starting without me.”

The tips of his ears turned red as you gestured to the file he was scanning. He dropped it, moving it over to you. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” You shook your head. “It’s your schooling. However you wanna do this, whatever pace you want, we’ll do that. Fury just wants you to know-”

“Politics and technology.” He shot you a small smirk. “I heard that too.”

You chuckled a bit, nodding. “Right. Okay. Let’s see here. Nickie said there was an apartment they got you…”

“Page six.” He informed you as you flipped through the pages.

You hummed, looking at the small apartment, perfect size for one person, right here in Manhattan…in the same building as yours, you noted. “Of course.” You rolled your eyes. You’d basically be his babysitter, and you knew neither of you wanted that.

“What? What’s wrong?”

You sighed, shaking your head. “This is my building.”

He blinked, looking down at the picture of the apartment. “Oh. Well, if you want I can request a change-”

“No, no. It’s fine. I just - I wish Fury told me.”

“Can-can I ask you a personal question?”

You shrugged, thumbing through the rest of the file. They basically wanted you to give him a government lesson starting with the fifties and then go over military technological advancements - a lot of Stark Industries stuff. “You might as well. We’re gonna be spending quite a bit of time together.”

“Why don’t you do personal?” You stopped your reading, tapping a finger on the table as you chewed on your cheek. “Sorry. You don’t hafta share if it’s too personal. I get it. I was never really into sharing my emotions, either.”

Turning your head to him, your lips pursed thoughtfully. His head was ducked, his blonde hair previously parted and styled was falling into his eyes, which were trained on his linked hands in his lap. His forehead was still creased, but it was more contemplative than confused as it was previously.

“I specialize in undercover operations.” Ignoring the way he whipped his head to you, slight surprise in those blues that you were answering his question, your head dropped back to the files, trying to act nonchalantly. “Before that I grew up in foster homes. My parents died when I was little. Drunk driver. No one survived. I was…two. I think. Maybe three. I learned to keep my head down to stay out of trouble; be the kid whoever had me wanted me to be. Anyways, I’m used to playing other people. I’m not really used to being myself.”

The room was blanketed with a silence that wasn’t uncomfortable. It wasn’t exactly comfortable, either, but it was welcomed as Rogers processed what you had just told him. His voice was quiet, almost shy, when he spoke up. “You can be yourself with me…if you want.”

You looked over at him again, your lips turning up slightly as you met his sincere gaze. “Thanks. You can be yourself with me too, Captain Rogers.”

“Let’s start with you calling me Steve, Agent Y/L/N.”

Your features broke into a bigger grin as you nodded, accepting his terms. “Alright, Steve. I don’t really have a preference. Just don’t call me Agent. I get flashbacks to every conversation with Fury.”

Steve laughed and you couldn’t help but enjoy the way his eyes shut, his nose scrunching up. “Alright.” He agreed with a beam. “I think I can avoid that, honey.”

All Works Taglist:

@happygoreading

@bibliophilewednesday

#cjswriting #fatws series oneshots #falcon and the winter soldier series oneshots #fatws series oneshot 1 #fatws series #back to the beginning one shot #steve rogers x reader #kinda #💛🧭#❤🐦💙🦾⏪

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seoulwhat · 3 years ago

Text

Wedding OR Not (#12)

Summary: Loving your best friend is a stupid and hard thing to do. Would you be able to allow yourself to let your best friend marry the one he loves so he can be happy?

Pairing: Rowoon x female reader

Genre: slight angst, fluff

Warnings: heartbreak

Word Count: 3.9k

He’s your best friend in the whole world. You love him with all your heart and your whole soul.

Yet…

He has never really seen how much you loved him. You tried to show him through your actions, but all he did was see you as a “friend”. It’s not like you didn’t want to be his friend. Of course, you did. You had known him since you were six years old and were neighbors. You remembered when he would ring your doorbell in the middle of the afternoon, and he would be crying because his dad yelled at him, or his older brother didn’t let him play with his toy car. You remembered in elementary school, he hated the school lunch, so you would always make an extra peanut butter and jelly sandwich and bring it for him. You remembered in middle school when he was bullied for not cutting his hair and everyone called him names, but you were there to hug him during his sad moments, and you were there to make him happy again. You remembered you told him in high school that you loved him and all he said was “I love you too. I hope we’re friends forever”.

So yeah, it did break your heart when he told you that he had been dating this girl and he thought that “she was the one”. But you two are best friends, so it’s a must to smile and be happy for him, right?

But you weren’t.

“I’m so happy for you. How long have you two been dating now?” You asked during a lunch that he kept rain checking. He took a sip of his water and began to speak.

“Actually, I’ve been dating her for a year and a half now.”

You almost spit your own food out and your eyes turned into the size of golf balls. “A year and a half!? Why haven’t you told me?”

All he did was shrug his shoulders and continued to eat his salad as he stared at you while you talked.

“What do you mean, you don’t know? We’ve been friends for how long now. Like forever? Rowoon, we’re best friends.”

Rowoon continued stabbing at his food with his fork and all you did was stare at him, waiting for an answer.

“She’s a jealous person.” He said quickly.

“Jealous? She doesn’t have to be jealous of me.”

“I told her you were my best friend and showed her a picture of you. She got upset and told me that she didn’t want me to see you again. I told her I couldn’t do that. So, we made a negotiation and I promised her that if I ever went out to see you, I would turn on the GPS on my phone.”

You furrowed your eyebrows. Why would he want to be with someone like that? You became aware that your best friend was in a controlling relationship. But why was he still being with her?

“Do you love her?” The question popped out quicker than you could even think.

Rowoon was quiet and he hesitated to answer. “I do,” he nodded. “I think I want to marry her.”

You had imagined that if hearts were made of glass, yours would have shattered to a million pieces. Unfixable.

“Are-are you sure? Shouldn’t you think this through?” You asked, trying to delay his thoughts. You didn’t want him to get married. Well, you did, but you wanted him to marry you.

He shook his head. “I already did. I want to ask her tonight actually. What do you think?”

What I think is that you should get out of this relationship before it turns worse. You should leave her before she becomes more controlling and starts to decide what kind of underwear you can wear and cannot wear. You should leave her because she’s not me. You should leave her because I love you. You should leave her because I would make you so happy and I would never let you go.

“I think that’s a good idea,” was all that you were able to say. You regretted bringing this up in your conversation. It was making you uncomfortable and you were already on a verge of tears. Your throat was burning from holding back all your tears.

Your lunch came to an end, and you were thankful that the conversation did as well. You weren’t sure how much longer you could take listening to him brag about how much he loved this girl. You hugged him goodbye, and he promised to call you to let you know what she said. You weren’t looking forward to the call because honestly, you were already devastated as is.

Once you were home, you made sure to put your phone on sound so you wouldn’t miss Rowoon’s call.

A year had passed and the only thing that kept your mind thinking about things, other than Rowoon, was jogging twice a day and taking daily walks throughout the park. You stopped waiting for his phone call a month after he promised he would call you. You tried calling him, but he changed his phone number, and you had no other way to reach him. You used to know where he lived, until the day you went to his door and an Asian couple opened the door.

At first, you didn’t want him to call you to tell you that she agreed to marry him. Then after the second and third day and so on, you impatiently waited for him to call and say something.

Maybe she said no? Or maybe he just never asked her and broke up with her.

You thought so many things, but a call never came your way to satisfy your curiosity. Like always, you woke up in the morning and put on some comfortable jogging clothes and went for your morning run. On your way back home, you checked your mail and noticed a nice red and white envelope underneath all the junk mail that piled up over the course of two weeks.

To: Y/F/N Y/L/N From: Soon to be Mr. And Mrs. Kim

You knew what it was as soon as you seen the sender. You couldn’t believe it. A year later and you’re barely hearing about this. You ripped open the envelope and took out a folded paper that let loose a couple of I Doconfetti that was inside. The paper was written in beautiful cursive writing, and you wondered who wrote it for them.

We would like to officially invite you to the wedding of Lee Mina and Kim Rowoon.

Please call the number below to RSVP your seat.

This was it. This was it. Tears began falling from your eyes. You felt like you were being dramatic, crying at your mailbox, but you couldn’t hold it in. He went through with it, and she said yes. He’s going to go through with it and marry this girl. You realized that he didn’t love you and you don’t think he ever did and ever will.

You grabbed the rest of your mail and ran inside your home. You slid against your door, your crying continuing. You tried to stop crying, but years of held back tears came spilling out of your eyes. You felt like you were never going to be able to stop.

But you did. A few hours later. You missed your walk in the park and your second jog for the day. But you didn’t care.

You read the invite repeatedly. You didn’t know if you did it to torture yourself or to make sure that the invite itself was even real. Either way, you decided to RSVP. You grabbed your cell phone and dialed the number. Two rings later, a female answers the phone.

“Hi, I wanted to RSVP a seat for the,” you looked at the invite to make sure you got her name right. “Mina and Rowoon wedding.”

“Okay, and can I ask who is calling and how many extra guests will you be bringing.” The female voice was so happy and squeaky, she was beginning to give you a headache.

“It’s for Y/F/N Y/L/N, and I’m not bringing anyone. Just bringing myself,” you said simply.

“Y/N?” The female repeated your name.

“Yes?” You weren’t sure if she was simply repeating your name or if she was going to ask you something.

“As in Rowoon’s best friend?” She said even more squeakier than before.

All you did was laugh. “Uh, I’m not so sure about that. I haven’t spoken to him in about a year. So more like an acquaintance.”

The phone went silent for a few seconds, and you can hear a muffled voice yelling in the background.

“I thought I told you not to invite her!”

“Of course, I’m inviting her! She is my best friend!”

A few yells later and the female began to speak on the phone again. This time, you knew you were talking to Mina.

“Okay, well your seat is officially RSVPed,” Mina said and then hung up. You didn’t even get a chance to say thank you, but you didn’t care if you didn’t anyway.

Two months later, spring had the flowers blooming and the cold air was now a warm breeze that you enjoyed. Today was the wedding and you were so happy you went dress shopping a month in advance.

You found a beautiful red dress, since the wedding is red and white themed, and found a nice pair of white pumps to go with it. You drove yourself to where the wedding was taking place and you didn’t know the wedding was going to take place at someone’s rich home until you got there.

So many people whom you didn’t obviously know were there and you felt so out of place. All you did was stand there awkwardly, hoping you would see someone you knew.

“Hey little red,” a familiar deep voice said from behind you. You turned around and was faced with a man dressed nicely in a tuxedo.

“Jaewook?! Oh my goodness, you got tall from the last time I seen you! Which was what? When you were fifteen?” You walked up to him and hugged him. He was now taller than you and smelled a lot better.

“Yeah. Look at you,” he said looking you up and down. “You lost weight and you look so good. Like, you look hot.”

He winked at you, and you swatted his shoulder. Same ol’ Jae.

“So, are you Rowoon’s best man?” You asked him.

He shook his head and gave me an angry look. “No. He chose Mina’s brother instead of me. Who does that?”

That surprised you. Rowoon used to be all about his family and he just ditched Jaewook out of his wedding like that, but all you did was shrug your shoulders.

“I honestly thought Rowoon was going to end up marrying you. You guys were like those two popsicles that come joined together. It was always hard to split you two apart.”

You smiled at the memories that came into your mind, but then frowned. “Yeah, but I haven’t spoken to Rowoon in over a year. He hasn’t called me and when I tried calling him, he changed his number. Then when I tried going to his house, he no longer lived there.”

Jaewook shook his head in disbelief. “This man is so hung up on getting married that he ignored his best friend, moved in with his fiancée, and has her brother as his best man just so he can marry her.”

“Not to mention that he loves her. He’s not just doing this to marry her,” you mentioned. Jaewook wrinkled his forehead and shook his head again.

“I don’t know why he does. Have you met the woman? She is fifty shades of crazy.” Both you and Jaewook laughed and continued making jokes about Rowoon ‘s soon to be wife.

“So that’s what you two do when I’m not around?” Rowoon ‘s voice sounded behind you and your heart began to crash against your ribcage.

“Aw come on Rowoon. We’re just having some fun,” Jaewook said. You still hadn’t turned around yet, scared of your actions and words when you do.

“I don’t consider making fun of my fiancée fun,” Rowoon said angrily. You turned around and made eye contact with him. His face seemed more chiseled, and his hair grew so much longer.

“Hello to you too. Long time no talk, don’t you think?” You said annoyed.

Rowoon ‘s tense shoulders relaxed at your words and his eyes changed from angry to worried. “I’m sorry I never called you.”

You put your hand up as if to cut him off. “I don’t want to hear it. I’m just here to see you marry the one you love, and then I’m out of here.”

“Y/N, hear me out please. I actually really need to tell you something in private,” Rowoon said lowly.

You looked at Jaewook and he raised his eyebrows and walked away.

“What do you want Rowoon?”

“Let’s take this somewhere more private.”

He grabbed your hand and dragged you to the inside of the home. He pulled you up the three-story spiraled staircase and pulled you into a room that looked as if he was getting dressed in it.

You crossed your arms and waited for him to speak as he locked the door. He turned around and ran up to you and hugged you. His body crashed into yours and he knocked the wind out of you. All you did was hug back until he let go.

“What was that for?”

“I haven’t seen you in such a long time. I missed you so much, Y/N. You have no idea.”

“Why didn’t you ever come see me then? Or call me?” You said stepping away from him.

“I couldn’t. She didn’t let me. She threatened to leave me if I didn’t change my number and move in with her. Not to mention, she threatened to leave me if I spoke to you. She even told me not to invite you, but I just had to. It’s not like she would cancel the wedding after the invites went out anyway.”

All you did was place your fingers on your forehead and shake your head in disbelief.

“What? Speak to me please. Tell me what’s wrong,” he begged. He walked up to you and grabbed your hand, but the feeling was too intimate for you, so you pulled away. “What did I do?”

You let him have it.

“What did you do? It’s more like what you didn’t do. Two years ago, you began drifting away from me and always making up excuses as to why we couldn’t hang out. Why? Because of Mina. You promised me you would call me about your good news, and I waited for a month before I realized you weren’t going to call. Why? Because of Mina. I tried calling you numerous times only to find out that you changed your number. Why? Once again because of Mina. You moved and didn’t tell me because of her. I cried myself to sleep, most nights, because of how much I love you. I began bawling my eyes out like a hormonal teenager in front of my mailbox when I received your wedding invite and didn’t stop crying until that evening. All because of Mina. Mina, the woman who made you change your number, made you move, made you have her brother as your best man, made you lose contact with your best friend because why exactly? Because she’s controlling. I don’t understand how you cannot see that if a person loved you, they wouldn’t put you through those things.”

Hot tears were burning down your face and you knew your makeup was ruined. But you didn’t care. You had to let it out. Rowoon just stood there gaping at you. You tried to clean the runny makeup on your cheeks, making your hands black from your eyeliner and mascara. The silence in the room didn’t bother you because you knew it would take Rowoon some time to process.

“You love me?” He asked. You weren’t sure if he was confused or if he was worried that you love him.

“All of that and the only thing you managed to process was that I loved you,” you laughed at him and grabbed a tissue from the dresser that was in the room. You turned your back to him and faced towards the mirror that was connected to the dresser and began wiping your face.

“Yes. I do. I have since high school. I even told you, but you took it the wrong way. I’m not expecting some pity party here. So please, spare me.”

You continued wiping your makeup, doing a pretty good job at making it look like you weren’t crying. When you were done and you turned around, Rowoon was gone, but you weren’t surprised.

The wedding began and you were seated at the worse table ever. You couldn’t see the bride walk down the aisle and you could barely see anything going on. You were, however, able to see Rowoon, which was enough for you.

“Dearly beloveds and honored guests, we are gathered here today to witness the giving and receiving of the marriage vows. Marriage is an institution ordained of God and is not to be entered into lightly or in jest and only after much consideration.”

The man began to speak, and you were already bored. You always thought that the best part about weddings was the end. The man continued talking, even reading some scriptures from the bible, and you almost fell asleep. The man continued to speak, but you knew it wasn’t straight from the bible because he was speaking in the English that you understood.

“Do you, Lee Mina, take this man, Kim Rowoon, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, to love, honor and obey, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto him for as long as you both shall live? If so, answer ‘I DO.’”

She squealed and laughed as she said her I Do. You cringed as she continued to laugh and rolled your eyes when she mentioned out loud how excited she was.

The man began to speak to Rowoon. Not that you could physically see, but by the vows he was saying, you assumed he was. “Do you, Kim Rowoon, take this woman, Lee Mina, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in heath, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her for as long as you both shall live? If so, answer 'I DO.’”

Rowoon quickly said I Do, but you didn’t see a smile on his face.

The man began to state, “If there be anyone present who may show just and lawful cause why this couple may not be legally wed, let him speak now or forever hold his peace.”

It was quiet for a few seconds before a voice boomed unexpectedly. It was none other than Jaewook’s.

“Rowoon, you know you can’t marry her,” Jaewook began. Jaewook was wobbling down the aisle and you knew he went straight to the bar when he left earlier. You quickly got up and ran to him, making a huge scene as you tried to pull him away, but he was too strong. “You’re marrying the wrong girl!” Jaewook continued to yell.

“Jae, be quiet. Let’s go,” you said hushing him and trying to pull him away from the wedding arbor. He pulled himself away from you and tried to steady himself.

“No! He has to marry you!”

The whole crowed gasped and turned towards you, and you didn’t move at all. You couldn’t believe Jaewook just said that in front of everyone.

“She loves you, Rowoon. How can you not see that she loves you and Mina doesn’t?” Jaewook slurred his words and began losing his balance and you ran to him and caught him on time before he fell unconscious to the ground.

“Get them out of here,” Mina demanded to Rowoon. You looked to Rowoon, and he had a sad expression on his face.

“I’m so sorry, Rowoon. I had no idea he was going to do this,” you told him. You were on the floor trying to pick Jaewook up, but he was just too heavy.

Mina walked up to you and pointed her scrawny skinny finger at you. “You! You’re the reason why I even started having problems in my relationship! Then you had to come here and ruin my wedding as well!?”

Almost instantly, she quickly drew her hand back and brought her hand against your cheek, burning your face as you quickly grabbed your cheek with your hand.

“Homewrecker!” She screamed and walked back to Rowoon and held his hands again. Rowoon continued to look at you and Jaewook with a doleful look and Mina dismissed you and Jaewook. “Ignore them. Please continue.”

But the man didn’t continue the vows. Rowoon dropped his hands from Mina and walked up to you and Jaewook. He brought his hand to your stinging cheek and softly caressed your face. You closed your eyes as his soft hand began to cease the pain and you felt like you were going to spontaneously combust when his lips crashed onto yours. You pulled back because you were surprised but Rowoon just pushed his kiss in deeper. That really made the crowd gasp and whisper.

His hand was still on your cheek as he slowly pulled away from your lips. “I love you, Y/N.”

“What?!” Mina yelled. “You love me! You cannot do this to me! This is my day!”

Rowoon looked back at her and laughed. “Not anymore it isn’t. I don’t love you anymore and I would never marry a rotten person like you.”

Rowoon turned his back on her and helped you and Jaewook off the floor. The three of you walked out, you and Rowoon both feeling relieved. You could still hear Mina screaming and crying, and when you looked back, she dramatically dropped herself to the floor, her face in her hands.

“And so, a week later you and dad got married?” Your daughter, June, asked. You nodded and continued to hug her as you both scrolled through the photo album of your wedding day. There was a picture of Rowoon smiling and laughing, which made you smile as well. You remembered how happy the both of you were and how happy Jaewook was to finally be Rowoon ‘s best man.

“What are my two favorite girls doing?” Rowoon asked as he walked in and plopped himself on the couch right next to you.

“Mom was telling me about the drama you two had when Mina was your girlfriend,” June said.

Rowoon just laughed. “Yeah, those were two crazy years. But I’m happy that your Uncle Jaewook objected during the wedding, otherwise I probably wouldn’t have noticed what a terrible person Mina was.”

“I heard my name,” Jaewook said walking into the living room with a beer. “I told your dad numerous times that she was one crazy chick.”

Rowoon rolled his eyes and smiled. He placed a kiss on your head and entwined his fingers with yours.

“I love you so much,” he said as you placed your head on his shoulder.

“I love you, Rowoon.”

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emmyisafanandacon · 3 years ago

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𝐌𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐮𝐧𝐰𝐚𝐲 (𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐭!𝐊𝐚𝐫𝐥 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐛𝐬 𝐱 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐫!𝐆𝐍!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

[FLUFF] Word Count: 2083 words It’s a very hot day out in the field, which is unfortunate since ground operations are currently ongoing today. You were hoping to delay the operations further down another term, but unfortunately, the backlog operations from the pandemic were ridiculous, so you decided to take your missed simulations all in one day. What a shame that you had to choose the hottest day of the year, it seems. So now here you are, sitting on a chair in the giant hangar as you wait for your head instructor to come back with your assigned instructor for your ground operations. The shade from the hangar may be some comfort, but it truly felt like the heat was bouncing off the asphalt. You quietly pray that it would not affect the aircraft you need to taxi, and hope that it would be a little cooler in the aircraft.

Probably not. It’s a single-engine aircraft. The metal might exacerbate the heat for you. You sigh out your discomfort and looked around. Around you were a bunch of different aircraft, some of the models you recognize from your classes. You hold back a small grimace, as you remember the last time you did your aircraft taxiing, your instructor pilot was a bit strict on your taxi control, requiring you to stay perfectly in the middle of the runway for the taxi. It was a miracle you passed that term. God, it feels like it has been 10 minutes since you last saw your head instructor. But he seemed to have disappeared out of nowhere. You just hope that the pilot assigned to you was a decent one. “Excuse me?” You turn around to find yourself staring at one of the newer pilots you saw hanging around the faculty. A tall young man gives you a sheepish grin, his grey eyes twinkling with jittery energy. He’s dressed in a typical pilot’s uniform, with a brown leather briefcase hanging from his shoulder. You’ve heard about him several times from some of your schoolmates, the new cute pilot with fluffy brown hair and a charming smile. He’s caught the attention of so many people, so it’s pretty interesting to finally meet the actual person. “Hi. I am so sorry that I took too long, that was very unprofessional of me.” he scratches the back of his head, clearly embarrassed. “No, it’s fine. I wasn’t waiting too long.” you lied. “The head instructor told me to wait here, I’m guessing it’s my turn on the aircraft?” He shakes his head, rubbing the back of his neck, “Unfortunately, there have been some setbacks on the scheduling. We might have to wait a bit longer before the run-up operation.” “It’s okay. I guess I’ll wait a little longer.” “I'm truly sorry about that,” he begins to look around the hangar. “They asked you to wait here?” “…Yes?” He looks up at the bright blue sky peering out of the hangar’s roof, blinking at the sun’s bright glare from the concrete ground. “Maybe it’s best if we stayed in the pilot’s lounge, that way you wouldn't have to stay in this heat.” He glances back to you with a nervous smile, his eyes almost iridescent. “If that’s okay with you! I was just thinking that the hangar might not be the best place to stay in. It’s a bit hot today that’s all.” You smile at the skittish instructor. “It’s alright Captain. I’m fine with waiting in the pilot’s lounge.” His cheeks began to turn red, as he gives a flustered giggle. “I- Please don’t call me that, it makes me feel a bit older than I should. I think we’re quite close in age after all.” “Okay,” you smile cheekily at him, saving the fact that he gets embarrassed quickly in mind for future references. “What should I call you then?” “Ah, sorry! I forgot to introduce myself,” he extends a hand out to you, “My name is Capt. Karl Jacobs. I’m one of the new flight instructors. Though you can call me Karl instead, I’d rather not follow protocol.” “[Y/N], Aerospace Engineering, Year 3.” He raises a brow, “Aerospace Engineering? Very interesting, what’s it like to have that course?” “If you can handle eons of mathematics, it’s not a bad course to have,” you laugh. He shakes his head. “I don’t think I can handle that much math, I’d rather leave that to better people like you. Shall we head to the lounge?” You nod, as you sit up and you start to gather your belongings to head to the pilot’s lounge. But Karl stops you and grabs your bag for you, giving you a wink as he starts to walk inside. You weren’t expecting that, but it’s not uncommon for flying students to try to be chivalrous towards their company. You follow him in, though you find your thoughts catching up to you. It’s absurd, you think, calling a pilot by their first name. Normally calling the pilots by their name was strange, but Karl clearly isn’t like the other pilots or the flying students you constantly rub elbows with. “Karl…” You try, slightly cringing at the lack of Captain or Sir. “Isn’t it a bit rebellious to not follow protocol? What would the other captains

say?” you jest at him as he leads you through the empty hallways. He gives you a little smile. “It’s fine for me. Don’t you call the AMT technicians and the AE engineers by their names?” You roll your eyes at him. “Well, that’s because we see them more often, and we’re more familiar with each other, so it’s fine to call them by their names. Though aren’t you guys stricter with the flying students?” He laughs at that, “We are, but you’re not a flying student. Unless… Do you plan on switching?” You shake your head, “Nope, you’re talking to an engineer through and through.” As you uttered those words, you both found yourselves in front of the pilot lounge’s entrance. He opens the door and holds the door for you expectantly, the cold air from the lounge blasting around you. You give a small smile of gratitude and enter, noticing that the lounge is also empty. “Why aren’t there many people around? Aren’t there students taking their required hours too?” You ask Karl as you seat yourself in one of the many chairs around the lounge, dropping your things down a table. “From what I understood, contact has to be limited still, and that there aren’t many students who have scheduled their ground operation schedule yet. So not many people should be on the grounds right now.” He explains as he brings out a folder from his bag taking the seat next to you. “Do you have your ground operations info sheet? I’ll help you fill out the details of the aircraft we should be using today.” You look at him in surprise, “Usually the technicians are the ones who help us fill this out, aren’t you the one who’s supposed to grade me instead?” He gives a cheery smile in response. “It’s fine, we don’t have much to do anyway as we wait. We might as well fill out the form, besides,” he lifts the grading rubric he has in his hand. “I’ll still grade you fairly based on your taxiing performance. Nothing to worry about.” You give him an impassive look, to which he laughs in response. “I won’t have too high expectations, I swear! I’m only strict towards flying students.” he raises his hands in defense. You sigh, but you allow him to take a look at your information sheet, filling up the details of the aircraft with his help. He stays close to you the whole time, and you can almost feel his fluffy curls touch your hair lightly, his warmth cascading over you lightly as you try to focus on your sheet. His hands meeting yours from time to time as he points at different parts of the info sheet, directing you on what to write. After the sheet was completed, you hand your sheet for Karl to keep and you fell into simple conversation, discussing technical things, like how it’s like to be an instructor or a pilot. Karl answered with an excitable passion for all questions, almost like a cute puppy receiving a treat. (“But wasn't the exam difficult? I heard so many people failed it.” “It took me one month to study for it.” “…Wow.”) Soon, the questions delved into personal territory, from why you chose to be an engineer and eventually fell into Karl’s many adventures as a flying student. (“How are you still a pilot?” “I have no clue either that was incredibly dumb of me too.” “Have you at least fixed your Monster addiction problem?” “…..Hey so, what do you guys do in that laboratory of yours?” “DON’T CHANGE THE SUBJECT KARL.”) You both learned so much about each other, learning that you two were only two years from each other. (“How did I not meet you sooner when you were still a student?” “I was always in the library.” “Like a nerd?” “No, I- Hey! Take that back!”) An hour passed, and soon the head instructor entered the lounge, notifying the both of you that it is your turn for the ground operation training, apologizing for the long delay. And yet, you don’t feel frustration for the long wait. You follow Karl and your head instructor out into the runway where the aircraft was dropped off by another duo taking the taxiing procedure. You both rush into the plane, climbing in as the propellers burst large gusts of air. The previous pilot

quickly switched places with Karl, as you greet your fellow student as you try to climb in. Once you got in the aircraft, you felt both excited and nervous as Karl looks through your paper. “Ready to taxi?” He asks with a cheery grin. You give him a small nod, as you watch him turn on the engine to a slow speed for the aircraft to start moving. “Remember to stay in the middle of the runway, and you can adjust the speed of the engine if you want the aircraft to go faster.” Pushing the pedals on your feet to center the aircraft onto the runway, you try to follow the white middle line on the concrete as best as you can. You find yourself slightly gripping the yolk, as you try to point the nose of the aircraft straight at the middle. Karl encourages you the whole time as you go for a turn towards the left. You notice another aircraft taxiing nearby and try to maintain a distance away from them, slowing to give them space. Karl smiles in acknowledgment as you still try to keep the pace and distance steady the best you can. He starts pointing out parts of the aircraft to you, introducing the flight instruments as you continue to steer the aircraft around the runway. Eventually, he directs you to park the aircraft to a specific area. As soon as the aircraft falls to a full stop, he gives your info sheet with a smile. “Congratulations, full marks. Maybe you could be a pilot instead, and fly with me?” He teases. You smile back at him, “I won’t be flying the plane anytime soon, but maybe I’ll work with you sometime in the future?” He giggles at the idea, “Let’s see. See you someday engineer, hope I’m your instructor again soon.” “See you someday, Captain Karl Jacobs.” You grin as you clamber out of the plane with the help of some technicians outside and head back to the hangar to check your info sheet. Exactly as he said, he graded your procedure with perfect marks, giving excellent praise and comments on your driving. Before you thought of passing the paper to your head instructor, you noticed a white sticky note attached at the back of the paper with a small message written on it. ‘It was fun talking to you, maybe you’d be up for more of that another time? Just shooting my shot. XXXX-XXX-XXXX -Karl <3’ You smile at the sticky note, keeping it in your pocket as you hand over your info sheet to your head instructor as he dismissed you off. As you head out towards the exit, you send a text out to the number. ‘Sure, coffee date sometime? Good luck on instructing everyone else. <3 -Future Engineer’

𝘪 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘪 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘰 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢𝘢 𝘪𝘮 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘪 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 20 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘢 𝘢 𝘢

𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘺𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘪 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘪 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘪 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯

𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳! 𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵!

#karl jacobs x reader #karl jacobs x you #karl jacobs x y/n #dream smp x reader #dream smp x you #dream smp x y/n #mcyt imagine #mcyt x you #mcyt x reader

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vivianweasley · 4 years ago

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In Love With My Best Friend (Fred Weasley X Reader)

Summary: When you realized that you have always loved George, it was already too late. Instead of being the bride, you became the bridesmaid. But it seemed like you weren’t the only one who’s in love with their best friend.

Pairing: Fred X Fem!Reader, George X Reader (unrequited love)

Warnings: angst (George getting married!) to fluff, drinking

Word count: 1.9K

A/N: I was listening to “Lucky” by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat while writing this!

Please do NOT repost my work or translate it on another site without permission! Thank you! Reblogs and comments are always welcomed

There are always a few things in life that people just take for granted.

Like that year’s Christmas Eve at the Burrows. That night, after a few glasses of butterbeer, you fell asleep lying on George’s shoulder. His shoulders were broad and he smelled like sweet cinnamon and caramel. You just felt so warm and secure next to him. At that time, you still couldn’t understand what that warm feeling in your heart meant, but you just naively believed that this feeling of warmth and security would never go away.

You were friends with the famous Weasley twins since your first year at Hogwarts and the three of you have been best friends for about twelve years now.

But regardless of being given more than a decade, you were still stupid enough to finally realize during the war that you have always loved George. And still you did nothing after that big realization, because you were afraid that he would find you weird or feel awkward around you. You just couldn’t afford sabotaging your friendship with him.

Plus, he’s your best friend so he would always be there for you, right? You could just confess your feelings whenever you are ready. So what’s the hurry?

But life rarely goes according to people’s plans. George eventually got a girlfriend. You were sad, but you weren’t hopeless. It was not like he never had a girlfriend before. So as long as he was not married, you could still wait for him.

But then, he proposed to her.

Fred told you this news when he came to your apartment for your weekly movie night. He always knew that you fancied George, so he decided to tell you this before you hear it from George at tonight’s dinner at the Burrows.

You swore to Merlin that you heard a huge exploding sound when you heard that news, but your apartment was perfectly quiet, dead silent even.

And then you went through what the muggles called the five stages of grief.

Denial. “Ha ha ha, that’s funny Fred. You got me, that’s a good one.”

Anger. “How could he do this to me! This is so not fair! I was here first! I was here for him for twelve years! This is not fair! I need to get him back! I don’t care if I’m gonna ruin the wedding! Fred Weasley, are you with me or not!”

Bargain. “Merlin, please! What should I do! I can trade anything for this, please!”

Depression. “Fred, I need some time alone. Oh I’m not sad...I just...I’m not crying......I’m sorry about your shirt Freddie, didn’t mean to use it as a tissue. I’ll wash it for you tomorrow.”

And finally, acceptance. “Merlin of course! I would love to be your Maid of Honor! I’m so happy for you George!”

You’ve prepared so much for this wedding, possibly overthinking every detail of it. For example, what should you say for your Maid of Honor speech?

Tell them how Fred accidentally splashed paint on your dress the day before the Yule ball, and how George managed to get you a new one one hour before the dance? No, you’re not the bride. This is not about you.

Tell them how you and George hid chocolates in the secret passage at Hogwarts when you were 12? The chocolates all melted after the summer and ants were crawling all over the secret passage. No, you wanted to keep that as your secret memory.

Tell them how George prepared for his bride’s birthday present when they first started dating? He decided to give her a whole box of puking pastiles for her to skip work, but you strongly opposed that idea. That’s a nice story, relevant to both the bride and the groom.

------------------------------------

You were sitting on the stairs at the Burrows, holding your notes in your hand and your nails anxiously tracing the side of the paper. The wedding was just at the tent beside the Burrows, but you were panicking now.

What the hell were you doing? The man that you’ve loved for so many years was getting married and you became the bridesmaid? How the hell did you get into such an unpleasant situation?

You knew that he doesn’t belong to you. He never did. You knew that, but going to his wedding is different. Did you really have the courage to watch him get married to another person? Were you really ready to face the fact that from this day on, George Weasley will never be yours? But you just wanted him to be happy.

Twelve years of memories with him raced through your head. You missed that and you missed the you at that time. You wanted to start over.

Your brain was a mess and the insides of your stomach felt like they were tangled together. And you couldn’t remember a single full sentence from your speech that you spent the entire night memorizing.

You wanted to run away.

“Are you still planning to steal the groom? Thought we are a team.”

You turned your head slowly towards the source of the voice and it took your brain a few seconds to process and give you a name, Fred. You tried to sound as normal as possible, “Oh no, don’t have the energy to do that anymore.”

You thought Fred just came here to make a lighthearted joke, but he sat down next to you on the stairs, “You know, you don’t have to give the speech if you don’t want to. You don’t even have to be the Maid of Honor.”

“No, I have to. I promised him.”

“Or you can give me your notes, or to Ginny. There are so many choices, take your pick.”

“It’s ok Fred, I can do this myself.”

“Fine, just remember that I’m always here to help.” He sounded so serious it surprised you. You’ve never seen Fred being so serious before.

You nodded.

“Alright! Let’s go then!” He pulled you up from the stairs and you followed him to the wedding venue with your head held high.

The wedding went well. When this moment, this moment that you’ve dreaded for so long, finally happened, you were actually feeling calmer than you imagined. Watching them exchanging wedding rings and becoming legal husband and wife, you actually felt relieved for a moment. This was finally the moment when you accepted the fact that George never belonged to you. This was finally the moment when you could officially let go of this unrequited love that you never really knew how to deal with.

After Fred’s toast, it was your turn. You stood up and everyone was staring at you now. Suddenly, you found yourself panicking again. Were you really feeling calm right now? Were you really ready to do this? What if you started to break down during the speech, with everyone watching? Your throat went dry. Your face was burning up, but your hands and feet were cold.

But someone held your hand under the table. You turned to Fred. He smiled at you and whispered, “You can do this.”

His hand was warm and his smile was so comforting, making you believe that you can indeed do this. You felt warmth gradually returning to your limbs. You felt like you could breathe again.

You eventually finished your speech without crying or stuttering. The guests were cheering and you saw George grinning at you, “Thank you Y/N!”

You replied with a soft smile. It was finally over. The wedding came to it’s conclusion and so did your decade-long unrequited love. Nothing dramatic happened. Everything was just the way as it should be.

You fell on your chair. You were grateful that your poor heart could finally find a moment of peace and tranquility. “When all of this is over, maybe I could finally get a good night sleep.”

“When all of this is over, maybe you could give yourself a break in Greece,” Fred replied.

“What do you mean?”

“Charlie was invited to study a really rare breed of dragons in Greece and they said he could bring two friends.”

You suddenly sat up, “Are you bringing me!”

“Yea, Charlie was bringing me and George at first, but I guess George won’t be available for the next month. So I thought I should bring you since you love Greek mythology and all that.”

“How did you know that!” You were surprised. You always loved learning about Greek mythology, but you never told Fred and George about it because you thought they won’t be interested.

“Please Y/N, I’m not that stupid. I saw you reading about it all the time.”

“I never thought you were stupid. I just thought- you couldn’t read!”

He looked hurt, “Is this how you treat someone who’s gonna treat you to a grand trip?”

“You’re right...Where’s Charlie? I need to thank him!” You replied and he laughed.

Slow music started to play and the bride and groom started dancing. The guests soon followed them.

“Y/F/N Y/L/N, may I have this dance?” Fred stood up. He bent over a little and offered his hand.

“Of course!” You smiled as you put your hand in his and followed him to the dance floor. You two were dancing right beside George and his bride. This scene took you right back to the night of the Yule Ball. That night, Fred was dancing with Angelina and you were dancing with George.

Fred thought back on that night too, “Looks like you’ve finally found the better dance partner.”

“Didn’t know you could dance too,” you teased, but you also wanted to compliment him. You always thought Fred would be more into dancing to up-beat musics, instead of slow sappy love songs like this. But now with your hand on his shoulder and his hand on your waist, leading you, it felt just right.

“Of course! But you still chose George that year, it’s your loss.”

You rolled your eyes, “Please, it’s not like you’ve asked me or anything.”

“Was planning to, but George asked you first.”

“What?” You thought he was only joking, but he stated it so matter-of-factly. A familiar tingling sensation started to rise in your stomach.

“It’s true. Why? Are you regretting your decisions now? Are you falling in love with me now?” He winked at you as he teased you.

“You wish!” You kicked him, but your heart was beating like crazy and you could feel your face heating up.

Oh no. Not this again! You finally moved on from George and now you were falling for his twin? You tried to calm yourself and regain some senses, but you could already feel the heat from your cheeks spreading to the tip of your ears.

Please, you were not going to make this kind of mistake twice! Because you knew from experience, it sucks being in love with your best friend!

-------------------------------------

Many stories would be so different if different people were telling it. Like that Christmas Eve at the Burrows that you remembered and held dear to your heart for years.

That night after you fell asleep on George’s shoulder, George fell asleep too, leaving Fred to be the only sober one. He tried to wake his brother, but the two of you were sleeping like the dead on the couch. Fred sighed and decided to carry you upstairs to Ginny’s room.

You were so drunk, but you still didn’t forget to mumble a “Thank you” when Fred tucked you in. He found that adorable. A warm feeling started to rise in his heart as his fingertips caressed your flushed cheeks. He couldn’t help but left a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“Good night love.” He whispered with a soft smile before closing the door and leaving, knowing this night was probably going to live in his head for a long time.

People all say that Fred is the more insensitive and oblivious twin, but that’s not true when it comes to the person he loves. Long before you even realized that you loved George, Fred figured it out.

But that’s alright, he knew he still got a chance. He knew he would always be there for you and one day maybe you would realize that too. He knew what’s your favorite song and what’s your favorite book. He knew how to make you smile so easily. He just felt so lucky that he’s in love with his best friend.

Part 2

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#fred weasley x reader #fred weasley #weasley twins #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley fanfic #fred weasley fanfiction #harry potter imagine #harry potter fanfic #harry potter fanfiction

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lubdubsworld · 4 years ago

Text

Better Man .

~~~~~~~~~~I wish I could forget, when it was magic~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taehyung x Oc

Rated 18 +

Post Divorce, Getting Back Together, Second chances, Angst.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

Chapter 4

How do you know you’re ready for kids?

Is it after you’re financially stable enough? After you’ve partied enough? Got all the wildness inside you tamed? After you’ve grown sick of the freedom that comes with youth and what it implies ? after you’ve grown tired of empty conversations that lead nowhere? sharing ubers with people you barely like because you’re too drunk to drive? When you just crave the comfort of people you truly love instead of strangers who grind up on you ? Or perhaps when you start preferring silence in the evenings to the thrumming bass in some dingy nightclub?

None of these really.

The truth is you’re never ready.

Hoshi had been planned. Taehyung and I had done our homework, studied everything from my ovulation cycle to the entire catalogue of some expensive breast pump , new in the market . Everything had been researched and planned and perfected : the wood the crib would be made of, the color he wallpaper in the nursery would be and the kind of diapers and wipes we would use.

But it still threw us for a loop....how unpredictable he was.

How unpredictable the pregnancy was.

What I wanted : Home birth. Mid wife . Taehyung by my side holding my hand.

What i got : Preeclampsia, a baby born six weeks early, Taehyung frantic on the phone in the middle of the night as he took his private jet from Japan where he was shooting a commercial. The pain of being induced into a labor that lasted for 16 hours only for my body to give up half way through.

A c section that left a scar and numbness that hadn’t faded even now , after four whole years. three weeks in the NICU....tears and terror after learning that the baby in the incubator right next to Hoshi’s didn’t make it. Aching to hold my son but being forced to stare at him through the glass, wires and tubes wrapped around his tiny torso.

And through it all, Taehyung.

Stronger than I had ever seen him. Calm and collected as he watched me pump milk for our baby, barely managing a few measly drops of it after thirty minutes of trying . His arms around me, holding me up as I tried to fight the sheer agony that came from my stitches, tried to stay conscious for the baby. Watching him carefully pour the milk into a sterile bottle to take down to the NICU .

Falling in love with him, over and over and over again throughout the day as he did everything for me.

Hoshi was loved and cherished , not just because he was an expression of our love for each other.

But a reminder of Taehyung’s love for me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ He’s growing out of all his clothes. I’m going to take him shopping tomorrow.” Taehyung commented, watching Hoshi get on his tippy toes to point out the pastry he wanted from the display case, while a star struck cashier stared at Taehyung .

Taehyung’s body guards were right near the table and while a crowd of people stood outside, none of them came too close. I was used to the attention that came with Taehyung and his celebrity status.

“That’s a good idea. I have a couple of meetings tomorrow regarding the Christmas campaign and I may not be able to make it on the weekedn either. Is it okay if I pick him on monday evening?” I asked, cutting into the blueberry scon on my plate.

“How about I drop him off at your office. Save you the trip.”

I hesitated, before nodding.

“I spoke to the lawyer....she told me the papers should be processed by the end of next month. My company will make a formal announcement from both of us and we’ll say we don’t intend to answer any other media questions.”

I stared at him, watching his face carefully for something different. A sign that would explain what had changed between us because something had. I was sure of it.

“ Why now, Taehyung?” I asked softly.

He held my gaze for a second, eyes warm and honest. Taehyung could hide his emotions well, but his eyes always told the truth.

“Because I’ve strung you along long enough. You deserve to be free.” He said finally.

I swallowed, looking down.

“I ....you didn’t string me along.” I shook my head.

“I think you deserve to be loved right, without the shadow of my failures hanging over you. I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life in a limbo because of one wrong choice.”

Wrong choice.

Whose ?

His? When he chose to drink That night?

Or mine? When I chose to walk out?

Or the both of us? For handling the fallout so badly?

I had so many questions but I didn’t say anything.

They were question that had no answers.

“So we move on.” I stared at him intently.

“I will always love you. I will always be there for you.” He smiled, eyes glinting a little.

i watched him, the familiar body. He had been my first. My best. Taehyung’s body was as familiar to me as my own and I wanted to hug him, hold him close and press kisses to his lips again. It wasn’t emotional or even sexual it was just...this urge to let him know that he was loved too. that he was adored. That he would always be loved.

“But, “ he went on, “ yes. Its been two years.... so.... we should move on. Meet other people. ”

“Fall in love again ?” I didn’t mean to sound bitter but my tone certainly was. He gave me a very tired smile and I felt guilt bubble up inside me.

“I’m not going to be that greedy, Mia. I will settle for just feeling a little less alone.” He looked away and my throat closed up.

He stood up, moving to the counter to pay for the treats that Hoshi had chosen.

And that was it.

I watched the small tendrils of warmth, rising up from my coffee, gossamer strips of smoke mingling in the cold air and melting into nothingness.

Here one second gone the next.

Just like my marriage.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was a little past seven when I reached my apartment, my phone ringing just as I dropped my coat and unwrapped the scarf from around my neck. I moved quickly to the bedroom, pulling my phone out of my handbag.

I picked the call, switching it to speaker before tossing my phone on the bed.

“Hello?”

“Jang Mi...its Jungkook. You ready?”

I swore, stripping out of my clothes quickly, fumbling with my bra and yanking my panties down.

“I’m just about to shower. Five me ten minutes!”

He didn’t reply and I frowned.

“Jungkook??” i called opening the closet to grab a hairband and shower cap.

“When you say you’re just about to shower...are you actually in the shower?” His voice sounded a little deeper than usual. Weird.

“What?” I was completely confused.

“Like are you naked in-”

Oh Christ.

I rolled my eyes, hanging up quickly. Sleeping with Jungkook, while extremely pleasurable had definitely been a little too much too soon. It made him take too many liberties, ones I wasn’t particularly comfortable giving him yet.

But I liked him.

He was, at the end of the day a nice guy.

A nice guy who had an actual interest in me. Those were rare to come by.

It was another fifteen minutes before I was ready, choosing a plain black jumpsuit in a flowy georgette material. It had nice flowy sleeves and i added gold jewelry at my wrists and earrings, just for a little bling. I stared at the dress at all angles. It definitely hugged my curves right but was also impossibly hard to take off.

So even if I got swayed by his good looks and made bad choices , by the time Jungkook undressed me , i would be able to come to my senses and stop myself from having sex with him again.

Groaning at myself, I grabbed the small black jeweled clutch from inside my dresser, slipping my phone in.

I steered clear of make up, choosing just a deep red lipstick.

The knock on the door came just as i finished slipping into black pumps .

I opened the door , only to have a dozen red roses thrust into my hands.

“Wow.” I whispered, glancing at him. He looked extra handsome, a blood red shirt clinging to his torso, a think black tie knotted at his neck. He gave me a devilish wink, eyes flitting all over me , licking his lips.

i tamped down the urge to back away, reminding myself that I was supposed to be moving on. Even if it wasn’t with Jungkook, he had asked me out on a date and I had agreed. I would enjoy myself tonight.

“Gorgeous. Ready?”

“Let me just put these in water...” I smiled at him, placing the stems into the cut glass decanter on the nearest table. I emptied the small bottle of water nearby into it , bending over to fix the petals when I felt him press right up against me.

Startling, i nearly spilled the water all over the floor, breath catching when his chest met my back . I felt myself trembling a bit because of how warm he felt, even with the inches between us and I could smell him, the subtle cologne that handsome men wear , just to drive women crazy.

The urge to lean into his body was so strong I had to clench my fists. Apparently, my body was very much on board with moving on even if my heart wasn’t. Jungkook made things worse by moaning into my ear, chin resting on my shoulder as he lightly gripped my waist, before reaching over with other hand, plucking one scarlet bloom from the bunch

I swallowed as he wrapped both arms around me in a backhug , holding the bloom up in front of my face.

“Do you like the scent of it?” His lips brushed my ear and I grinned. I hadn’t been flirted with , like this in years. I bent my head to lightly breath in the air near the bloom, enjoying the subtle scent. “It’s lovely.” I said honestly.

He casually broke the stem off, a couple of inches from the where the petals began.

“Turn around for me “ Jungkook whispered in my ear again. I turned around quickly, my lips inches from his, refusing to back away, staring right at him. He smirked, bringing the flower up to the small upknot on the side of my head.

I stayed still as he carefully pulled a single bobby pin out, sticking the stem into my hair before casually using his teeth to pry open the pin again and slotting it into my hair, pinning the flower in place.

Apparently, watching Jungkook pin a rose into my hair was winning brownie points for him in my brain, because my entire body went warm , my heart beating faster.

“I’m scared to ask why you’re so good at this...” I smiled and he raised an eyebrow.

“I have a daughter remember? Its a lot of ribbons and bows and pins.” He grinned.

The idea that Jungkook did his daughter’s hair for her, with ribbons and flowers was so ridiculously endearing I wanted to coo.

“There. Now we match.... A little.” he smiled.

I stared at him, the black tie on his red shirt and the red rose against my black dress.

“Smart. “ I nodded.

“Shall we leave?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I had fun tonight.” Jungkook hesitated .

The night had been so much more fun than I’d anticipated. Jungkook somehow convincing me to party crash someone’s engagement party near the pool with an open bar and ridiculous ninety’s party music. But I’d danced to my heart’s content, my hair coming undone half way through and I was only a little upset that I’d lost the red rose in the middle of people.

“I had a lot of fun too Jungkook’ah..” I smiled, honest .

“We should do this again. Since we never got to actually talk. It was just you getting progressively drunk and dancing like you wanted to pee.” He teased and I pouted.

I reached out and pressed a palm to his face...his skin smooth under my skin and I felt myself swaying just a little, lethargic and a little aroused from the scent of him.

“Wanna get another drink?” And then because I was completely gone and had no filter, “ If you come inside....maybe I’ll let you cum inside. if you know what I mean.....” I drawled, waggling my eyebrows.

Jungkook’s face morphed into one of absolute shock, lips parted and then he laughed so hard he choked, coughing.

“Wow. You are drunk.” He shook his head, looking amused. “ How about this.... I’ll come in and tuck you into bed and if you drink a couple of glasses of water for me, I will not tease you about this tomorrow.” He offered.

I pouted.

“You don’t wanna come inside...?”

“Oh baby , you have no idea how bad I wanna come inside.....but not like this” He brushed the hair off my brow, kissing my forehead...” Ask me again when you’re sober and we’ll work something out. Now let’s get you into bed.”

I groaned as he dragged me into the bedroom.

The moment my head hit the pillow, I fell asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!~

Author’s note : Not me falling in love with the second lead in my own story ugh. He’s gonna get a separate story. I’m gonna write a whole entire fic for CFO! Jungkook , adorable single dad of cute little girl.

I don’t have a tag list for this fic so please do let me know if you want to be tagged !!!

#taehyung smut #taehyung fics #taehyung fanfic #bts au #bts fanfics #bts smut

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theloneliestshipper · 3 years ago

Text

five times he thought she would leave (and the one time he didn't)

Can't believe I've been in fandom this long and I've never written a "five times" fic. Until now. :)

1. Failure

He waited until he knew she would be asleep before joining her in bed. This wasn’t how he expected the day to end.

It started with a message from Leia, rousing him from slumber in the cockpit of Slave I. He didn’t realize he was smiling until he switched on the nav computer to chart the quickest route home. She had some new outfit to show him, not it really mattered. She missed him and wanted him, that was the important part.

Now all he wanted to do was go back to his ship. To feel the comfort of the familiar walls and instruments. To be alone.

He had a son on the way. Half of him and half of Leia giving her the assurance that he couldn’t provide.

No matter how long we’re together, you’ll always be bracing yourself for the sad and bitter end.

He stood in the doorway of their bedroom, his eyes tracing in the vague shape of her under the blankets. Maybe she was right.

She won’t remember you.

Sintas had said that about Ailyn once. She knew it wasn’t true, she said it to hurt him. He knew it wasn’t true and he left anyway. There was almost nothing in his life he regretted as much as that day.

Leia might one day despise him just as much. He laid down beside her in bed. She stirred a little and shifted back towards him the way she always did. It was habit, not forgiveness. He put her hand lightly on her side, his fingers just crossing onto her stomach. He listened to her breathing in the dark. “I’m sorry,” he said aloud, but not loud enough to wake her. I'll try, but it won't be enough.

2. Translation

He stayed close for the first few months while she battled morning sickness and exhaustion. He never enjoyed playing one of her senate guards and standing by while she made small talk with her politician friends, but at least like this he was useful.

They were flying in for yet another meeting when she turned her head toward him. “I think I’d like to see you naked while we’re on Coruscant.”

Boba stared at her from behind his helmet’s visor. She was sitting in the co-pilot’s seat on Slave I, the belt wrapped tightly over her swelling stomach. Her tone was casual. “Okay. But you see that all the time.”

“No, I’ve never seen it before and I want to.” Her expression was completely serious. No dancing light in her eyes, no teasing curl of her lips.

“You saw it this morning,” he insisted.

She was looking at him like he’d grown another head. “Boba, I swear to you I have never seen that play.”

“...Play?”

“Yes! You, Naked is a play about the life of Valdorr Sunspar. The artist?”

He should have been able to get it from context clues, even if he had no idea who the fek Valdorr Sunspar was. He braced himself for laughter, but it never came.

Instead Leia leaned forward and pulled up the holonet on the console. “Here. This mural is his most famous piece.”

He had seen it before. A smaller version, maybe a faded print hanging on the wall of some cantina. Leia met with educated and powerful people on a daily basis and they often talked about things that sounded like a foreign language to him.

Their lives were so different, with so many different points of reference. One day she would get tired of explaining things to him.

3. The Force

“Look at him, he’s the spittin’ image of ya.” Fenn Shysa swiped at his arm, and for once Boba didn’t try to avoid the blow. The other man’s fist connected hard enough to sting.

Jonah was sleeping the way he never could manage to at night, oblivious to the two men standing over his crib.

“Where’s Leia?” The Mand’alor asked.

“Packing.”

She was joking about it this morning. “What does one wear to an uninhabited swamp planet?” Boba couldn’t play along. His stomach was a knot of dread. Dagobah wasn’t just a swamp planet. It was where Skywalker trained with a Jedi Master in exile. It was where he wanted to train his sister.

And for once, Leia wasn’t saying no.

“I’ll keep an eye on things while you’re gone,” Fenn said. “Don’t worry.”

Mandalore was just one more thing Leia could cast aside if she chose to follow her brother’s path. She would take Jonah with her. He might look more like Boba in coloring and features but he was Leia’s son in one crucial way.

He was like them.

4. Competition

“Come on Jonah. You can do it.” Leia stretched out her arms, her fingertips just short of the toddler’s reach.

“Maybe he’s not ready to walk yet.”

“He can cross the living room with alarming speed when he has furniture to hold on to,” Leia retorted. “Trust me. He’s ready.” Jonah slowly let go of the chair back and Leia dropped to her knees, her arms still outstretched. “That’s it. Walk to Mama.”

Jonah took one determined step forward, pivoted and took four steps until he collided with Boba’s knee. “Da!” He crowed, reaching up. It was so sudden Boba almost forgot to act surprised.

“I guess you’re right,” he said as he gathered the boy up. Jonah had taken his first step two days ago while Leia was still at the Galactic Summit on Sullust. “He is ready.”

Leia sighed, her hands dropping into her lap. “I gave birth to you, you little traitor.”

“Do you want to try again? Maybe he’ll walk to you this time.” Boba started to put him down, but Leia was already rising to her feet.

“No, don’t push him. We’ll have lots of time to work on it while you're working next week.” She kissed Jonah’s round cheek and he giggled. “But you can give him his bath and put him to bed tonight since the two of you are such a good team.” Her commlink chirped and she picked it up. A warm smile crossed her face, and her lips compressed as if she was holding in a laugh.

“Your brother?”

“No. Remember Isolder? From Hapes?”

“The prince.” The prince who wanted to marry Leia and make her queen of Hapes. “His mother hasn’t killed him yet?”

“No. She was deposed and now we’re working together on this new energy bill.”

After she left the room Jonah reached up and patted Boba’s cheek. “Da. Dada.”

“Our job is to make her happy,” he reminded his son. He lifted him up and turned him upside down as he squealed happily. “And speaking of that, you’re going to bed early tonight.”

5. Independence

“Did he fall asleep?”

“Yes. Jonah did too.” Leia climbed into bed beside him and flopped back on her pillow with a weary sigh. “We’ll take him to the med center tomorrow. He’s malnourished and there could be other delays. We should try to get as much information as we can so we know what kind of support he’ll need.”

It was reassuring to know that she was making plans for their newly adopted son. Boba turned to his side to face her. “What made you change your mind?”

“You didn’t exactly give me a choice.” Anger rippled through her voice, reminding him that he was very much still in the strillhouse.

“I said I was-”

She turned and her fingers covered his mouth. “I appreciate your apology. I do. But I’m still furious that you adopted a child without asking me. We have to make these decisions together.”

He caught her hand and kissed her palm. “You’re right.”

“No.” She pulled her hand away. “That’s not going to work this time. I’m going to be angry for a while and you’re going to have to deal with it. Do I make myself clear?”

“You do.”

“Good,” she continued in the same hard tone. “Also I’m very proud of you. It doesn’t make me feel any better but I want you to know that.” Leia turned away, pulling the blankets with her.

“Is there anything I can do?”

“You can lie awake all night and think about how you screwed up.”

Fierfek. She knew him too well.

5. Success

They stood in the wreckage of the courtyard, three senators, a traitor and Boba Fett.

“We could just agree to keep quiet about it.” Senator Pooja Naberrie looked at Leia and then at him. She didn’t even need to say it out loud. After years of “keeping it quiet” her colleagues finally knew the truth.

Leia frowned, weighing her options.

It wasn’t going to go well. Her friends and her rivals would use him as an excuse to discredit her and to question her judgement. He was, as he’d told her long ago, a liability. But when he looked around the courtyard again at the homemade explosives she used to defend herself with, he felt nothing but calm.

“If I ask you to keep quiet now then it’s a cover-up,” Leia observed. “And a ticking time bomb. Boba?” She turned to him. The front of her dress was torn and stained with blood.

We have to make these decisions together.

“I know what I signed up for.”

Her shoulders relaxed a little and there was a warmth in her eyes that felt like an embrace. “Thank you,” she said. The adoring look wasn’t just for him, it was for the people standing in this courtyard with them wondering why the hell she was married to him.

He turned his attention to his prisoner. One quick stop in Coruscant to deliver the traitor and then they could pick up the boys. Maybe a small vacation was in order, to ride out the worst of the publicity. A little family time.

Whatever happened, they would face it together.

#boba fett/princess leia #meeting like this au #rebelbounty #angst #feels #prompt fill #my fic

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half-bakedboy · 4 years ago

Text

jumping to (the wrong) conclusion (read on ao3)

Pairing: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz Rated: General Summary: “Buck, Eddie was trying to tell you he’s in love with you,” Taylor said, her voice more serious than he thought she’d be capable of with so much alcohol in her system.

“He— No— Wait, I— What?” Buck’s mind came up with rapid-fire responses because no part of him was truly ready to handle the fact that his best friend might feel the same for Buck as he had for the last two years.

Or Eddie realizes something about his best friend, Buck finds his courage and Taylor gets to witness it all.

A Season 4 Episode 11: First Responders Extended Scene (contains minor spoilers for the ep)

The adrenaline was still pumping through Eddie’s veins even after he had changed out of his sweat-soaked uniform and taken a longer than necessary shower at the station. His blood was thrumming under his skin and he was sure he would vibrate right out of his body if he had the ability. The gunshots still echoed in his ears, Bobby’s quick actions flashing across his mind, and before Eddie realized it, he was pulling up to Buck’s apartment building.

He should have figured that’s where he would end up. Chris was with Hen, Karen, and the kids for the night, and Eddie had planned to drink a few beers by his lonesome while watching the UFC fight he had missed a few days prior. He had set it up to be the perfect night in his head, but he realized that his night couldn’t be nearly perfect because Buck wouldn't be there. Buck was just… inevitable.

Before he could think about what that meant, he got out of the car and locked the door with his keyfob, knowing that Buck would recognize the familiar beep of his car. He was lucky enough as he walked in that one of Buck’s neighbors that Eddie knew to be a night nurse was just leaving for her shift.

“Eddie, stopping by again already?” Becky shouted with a wiggle of her eyebrows. He jogged up the steps and grabbed the door from her, picking up the water bottle she had dropped on the floor to help her out. While Becky was very sweet and often let Eddie in when Buck wasn’t awake yet, he didn’t really feel like sparking up a conversation when his mind was racing as it was.

“Yeah, is Buck around?” He asked, making sure to keep a safe distance between them.

“He is, I think he came back with—“

Before she could finish, Eddie interrupted, “Thanks so much. Have a good shift!”

He was pretty sure he sprinted up the steps, unsure of how his feet were moving so fast. His mind was still racing, over and over with only thoughts of Buck clouding his conscience. Buck, who had been his best friend for years and had saved Eddie - not to mention Christopher - more times than he could count. Buck, who was the only thing Eddie had thought about for the last few months like a stream of what if’s and what could be’s that spiraled around his mind. Buck, Buck…

“Buck?” He called as he pounded his fist against the door. It was overkill, he knew. Buck had never not answered the door for anyone if he was home because he was just too kind to ignore someone who may be in need. Eddie’s smile widened on his lips at even the mere thought of Buck and he ran his hands over his face in both frayed nerves and sheer excitement as he waited for Buck to answer.

When the door opened and Buck’s confused look turned into a wide smile, Eddie pushed himself past the entrance and turned on Buck before either of them spoke. He thought at first that he wouldn’t know what to say, but then his eyes met Buck’s and he couldn’t stop himself from once the words started.

“I almost got shot today. Again,” Eddie added with a laugh, and Buck’s face contorted into that deep concern he seemed to always have for everyone but himself. “I’m fine, we’re all fine, but Buck, I was caught in the crossfire of yet another person with an indescribable amount of evil in their heart and it was like I was back there, in Afghanistan with enemy fire coming at all sides. That adrenaline, that fear, that instinct to survive kicked on in full force.”

“Eddie, are you—“ Buck tried to speak, his arms reached out as if to inspect Eddie for injury, but Eddie stepped closer and grabbed his hands tightly instead.

“And all I could think about was you,” Eddie admitted, shaking his head in disbelief that he had actually said it. “I heard the first shot and I thought, ‘thank god Buck isn’t here so I can focus on the girl I’m here to save’ and at no point did I stop to question why that was. Then I was loading her into the ambulance, about to crawl outta my skin with— with thrill just vibrating through me and somehow I found myself here.”

“Maybe we should—“ Eddie barely noticed Buck suddenly tense and glance over his shoulder.

“I realized that I am always going to find myself here because you’re my person, you know? My partner that I trust in times of severe danger, my best friend that I want to be around when anything exciting happens to me, and Jesus, Buck, I want you—“

“If it isn’t the one man at Station 118 that can’t stand me.” The voice had Eddie’s bubbling blood freezing in his veins and if he had hackles, he was sure they’d be standing at attention. Eddie turned and saw none other than Taylor Kelly - Eddie refrained from calling her the reporter from Hell because he knew Buck hated it - making herself comfortable in the kitchen with a half-empty champagne glass in her grasp and a knowing smirk on her face.

“I didn’t realize you were coming by, Eddie, I—“ Buck began, but Eddie held up his hand. It was then that he noticed Taylor’s discarded shoes next to the kitchen island and the already empty bottle of champagne on the counter.

“No, I’m— I’m sorry for barging in like this. I’ve clearly interrupted…” Eddie trailed off, tearing his eyes away from Taylor to gaze back at Buck, “whatever this is so I’ll just head out.”

“Why don’t you join us, Firefighter Diaz? We’ve got extra champagne to celebrate our successes today and I’m definitely not one to turn away fine looking men on such a beautiful night,” Taylor commented and Eddie noticed the glare Buck shot at her. He also noticed the twinkle in Buck’s eyes and the way his lip tugged up at the corner like he couldn’t help but be amused by her.

“You two have— a night. Together. Without, uh, me,” Eddie said before he rushed out the door.

-------------------------------

The door slamming interrupted the giggles bursting from Taylor’s lips. Buck knew she was tipsy - they both were, in all fairness, - but the way she snorted and then laughed some more told him she was far beyond safe to drive home that night.

“Oh my god, that poor dude, he just— came in here guns a-blazing,” Taylor said and then laughed more, presumably at her own ridiculous joke. She took a deep breath and shook her head, staring up at a wide-eyed Buck. “Well, what the hell are you still doing in here, idiot?”

“What? Where else would I—?” Taylor grabbed the cork from the counter and threw it directly at Buck’s head. It bounced off his temple and hit the floor before Buck reflexes could catch up to him. “Damn, Kelly, you play softball at journalism school or something?”

“Yeah, it’s what gave me such a good gaydar,” she replied. Buck was unsure how that was relevant to the conversation and tilted his head at her, pursing his lips in questions. “Buck, Eddie was trying to tell you he’s in love with you,” Taylor said, her voice more serious than he thought she’d be capable of with so much alcohol in her system.

“You’re not stupid, Buck, and I know I tell you all the time that you are, but you know I don’t mean it,” Taylor said, walking over to Buck and resting a comforting hand on his bicep. “Eddie was just spouting poetry at you, dude. You heard what happened over at dispatch today. If Josh hadn’t been so on his game, there’s a solid chance that Eddie - the entire team - might have—“

“Oh my god, he—“ All of sudden, Eddie’s words caught up with him. All I could think about was you. You’re my person. Forever. The words flashed in Buck’s mind like lightning on a hot summer night and he wasn’t sure he was breathing anymore.

“He loves you,” Taylor reassured, nudging him toward the door. All it took was the familiar beep of Eddie’s car unlocking for Buck to surge into action.

He threw himself down the stairs at least two at a time and pushed the door open with a huff and a shout for Eddie; his partner, his best friend, the person he had been in love with since the very beginning. Eddie stopped but didn’t turn, and Buck could see the white-knuckled grip he had on the door handle even in the limited light.

Buck was never good at saying the right thing. He spoke without thinking more often than not which anyone that had ever had a conversation with Buck would attest to, but he knew that he couldn’t do that then. Whatever he chose to say at that very moment would make or break their relationship even further than it might have already been the moment Eddie laid his eyes on Taylor.

He had it all planned out before. He would ask Eddie out on a real date and when he inevitably thought they were getting dinner as friends, Buck would declare his intentions with a brave voice and hope with everything in him that Eddie felt the same. He straightened his spine, brought his shoulders back, and crossed his arms over his chest, but the voice that followed did nothing to match the strong stance.

“Athena arrested me today,” Buck noted, cursing himself at the ridiculous start. When Eddie didn’t turn around, Buck took a cautious step forward and rested a hand on his shoulder, grateful for the way his grip eased on the door. “I got into trouble that I shouldn’t have to try to do the right thing and it was probably reckless and stupid, but I did it as I’m sure you knew I would,” Buck laughed and shook his head as he admitted, “and the entire time I wished it was you beside me.”

He ignored the shout from Taylor who apparently didn’t like that comment.

“I didn’t know you were the one getting shot at, but if I did, I— I don’t think Athena could’ve kept me in that interview room,” Buck said, grateful when Eddie turned on him with wide eyes.

“Wait, Thena literally arrested you?” Eddie asked incredulously, but Buck saw the little bit of amusement in his eye anyway.

“I mean, nothing that’ll show up on record, cause you know I would’ve called you to bail me out,” Buck noted. Eddie laughed and looked down at the keys in his hands and Buck took the chance to move one step closer. “I didn’t know you were there, putting yourself in the line of fire, Eddie. The second I heard you say it, I couldn’t hear anything else because I was too worried that even though you were standing right in front of me, there was a chance you could not have been.”

“You didn’t… hear me?” Eddie asked, glancing up at Buck like his worst fear had come true. Buck was pretty sure the adrenaline rush Eddie had was washed away by seeing Taylor in his apartment and if that was Buck, he wouldn’t have the courage to say all that he admitted again. So Buck let himself take the reins.

“Do you wanna get dinner?” He asked, just as he had practiced so many times before.

“Do I want to…”

“God, Diaz, just say yes so that I can go pass out on Buck’s couch with the satisfaction of all the good I’ve done today,” Taylor yelled and Buck glared at her once again.

“Does saying yes to you mean I have to like her?” Eddie asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Buck huffed out a laugh and said, “She grows on you.”

“Sounds like someone else I know,” Eddie commented as he locked his car doors again and pushed past Buck as easily as he had a few minutes ago.

“Is that a yes, then?” Buck asked as he jogged to catch up, bumping his waist into Eddie’s as they reached the front door.

“Got any more champagne?” Eddie asked, avoiding Buck’s question. Taylor let out a snort as she followed them into Buck’s apartment.

“Oh, I like this one, Buck. He’s gonna be good for you,” Taylor said before throwing herself on the couch and leaving the two men in the kitchen.

“He already is,” Buck muttered, staring over at Eddie who had helped himself to a beer he had no doubt left in Buck’s fridge. “Except he still hasn’t answered my—“

“Yes, Buck. Dinner sounds great.” And it really, really did.

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buck x eddie #eddie x buck #buddie fic #coda fic #911 coda #911 on fox #911 spoilers #ish #its not that spoilery i dont think??#idk asldkjf;as #HOW THE SCENE SHOULD HAVE GONE IMO #my writing #hope you like it!

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stellarstarwarsimagines · 4 years ago

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75 and 94 with Sith Anakin :)

Thank you so much for requesting this because this has to be one of my favorite Anakin stories I’ve ever written. It’s super sad, but I still hope you enjoy! :D

This was not how you wanted today to go. It wasn’t supposed to be a difficult mission. Get the supplies, and get out. Was it a dangerous place? Of course, but everything was these days with the Empire marking their territory wherever they went. But never in your wildest dreams had you expected there to be Inquisitors hiding there, and never had you expected to have to deal with two. As good of a Jedi as Ezra was becoming, he wasn’t able to take on one by himself yet, and you had done the best you could to make sure he was out of harm’s way before surrendering.

You knew Kanan would kill you for it if you ever saw him again, but you cared more about Ezra staying alive than getting killed yourself.

They had stripped you of your lightsaber and cuffed you, leading you to a star cruiser that they mentioned belonged to Lord Vader. They seemed to enjoy talking about what he was going to do to you, and how they hoped they would get to watch.

Having heard of Lord Vader, the atrocities he had done, the only thing you could do was hope that you could find a way to annoy him enough to make your death as quick and as painless as possible. After all, you didn’t fear death anymore.

Not when it would bring you back to the love of your life.

You showed no resistance as you were shoved into an interrogation chair and strapped in, all fight drained out of your body. What was the point? Unless the Ghost Crew could pull off another miracle, you were about to die. You just had to make sure you didn’t give up any Rebellion secrets while you were doing so.

Eventually the two Inquisitors left you with your thoughts, and you took this moment to close your eyes in meditation, saying a final goodbye to those you loved. Obi-Wan, your oldest friend who had saved your life more times than you could count, Ahsoka, the girl you had watched become a warrior with the kindest heart you knew, Rex and Rutt, the two clones who had laid down their lives for you. Then there was the newest, but some of the most important members of your family. Hera, the sister you never knew you needed, Zeb who always could make you smile no matter what the situation, Sabine, the selfless and talented woman who always put others first, Ezra, the young and incredible Jedi you had been helping to train, and then there was Kanan. Sweet, amazing, Kanan who had done more for you in the past few years than you could remember.

A tear dripped down your face as you could almost feel the man through the Force, a flicker of anxiety and turmoil from miles and miles away. You knew he wouldn’t want you to give up, you knew he would try to save you, but if it was time . . . It was time.

Your only regret was knowing that you were leaving behind the most important -

You heard him before you saw him, his boots were heavy on the shining black floor. The darkness surrounding the man in the Force was suffocating, and you dropped your head, trying not to drown in it. “A Jedi, surrendering . . . I never would have expected it.” Was all he said from behind you, the voice diluted with a modulator from the mask you knew he wore.

“What did you expect? Me to let you kill my friend? I suppose that’s what the Empire would do.” You responded, your voice shakier than you would have liked.

He chose to ignore your words, his footsteps pacing back and forth behind you, allowing you just a glimpse of black and the silver flash of your lightsaber in his hands. “Where did you get this lightsaber?” Vader asked.

Was that the question that he wanted to open with? You would have assumed there would have been some threatening, the usual, tell me what you know about the rebellion, where is the secret base, blah, blah, blah. Not where you got your lightsaber. After all, that answer was so obvious you didn’t feel the need to respond.

“Do I need to repeat my question?” Vader asked once more, his voice calm, and didn’t even give you a chance to respond to him. You felt a pressure around your throat, growing stronger with every passing moment until you couldn’t get any air into your lungs. You started coughing, your hands trying to fly to your throat, but unable to strapped down at your sides. Tears of panic formed in your eyes as you struggled against an unforeseen force, but then as quickly as it had arrived, it was gone, leaving you gasping for air. “Where did you get this lightsaber?”

You were scared. You hated to admit it, you knew that Jedi weren’t supposed to feel it, but you were. The darkness Vader seemed to emit almost smothered you in your entirety. You had never felt someone so dark, and your fear, as it always had when it reared its ugly head, made you lash out. “Where do you think I got it? A market? I made it! Went to Ilum, found a crystal, constructed it myself -” You choked out before he interrupted you.

“You’re lying!” The sudden burst of emotion in his voice shocked you. From what you had heard about Vader he was always calm, precise, even when he was in the midst of torturing someone. “I know the woman who made this, and she is dead!”

“Oh, so I’m dead? Good to know. It’ll save us a lot of trouble here then won’t -”

You felt a hand grip your hair, tugging it up sharply until you were face to face with the mask Vader hid behind, and in that moment . . . something changed.

The dark, terrifying, intimidating, Darth Vader gasped out your name in a low, weak voice and collapsed to his knees in front of you.

This version of Vader frightened you even more than the one you had seen earlier. “W-what are you doing?”

He didn’t answer you. For several moments, he stared at you through those black lenses, and you wondered how he could even see you through them. You knew he was though. You could feel his gaze piercing your skin like a glacier, sending chills all the way from the top of your head to the tips of your toes. You didn’t want to look at him any longer, hating the way it made you feel, and that was when his head dropped. You watched him with confused eyes as his gloved hands went to his helmet and began to lift it off, something you knew he never did, to reveal a head of dirty blonde waves, the ends of them brushing the shoulders of his dark robes.

Then, he lifted his head, and you were met with achingly familiar eyes, even with their change of color.

That was when the fragile pieces of your life came crashing down around you. For several years now, all you had ever been sure of, was that Anakin Skywalker was dead. Your Force connection with him had been so strong. It was the only explanation for it blinking out of existence the way it had, ripping what felt like a part of your soul along with it. Obi-Wan had told you that he was dead. That the Emperor had killed him.

Yet here he sat, on his knees in front of you, looking as fragile and distraught as you felt. You had stared into that handsome face too many times to confuse it with anyone else. You knew every single inch of that man, he had been seared into your memory, and there was no doubt in your mind that despite everything you believed, it was Anakin in front of you.

“The Emperor . . . he told me that you were dead. That Obi-Wan had killed you.” His gloved hand went to your cheek, touching you as if you were made of glass. “If I had known . . .”

His touch, something that you had longed for, dreamed of for so long, tore you apart. It couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be happening no matter what you were seeing. Was Vader putting these thoughts in your head somehow? There were three people in the whole universe who knew how deep and strong you and Anakin’s love had been. How could he have found out something so personal to torture you with? Because that’s what this was, the deepest torture you had ever had to endure, and you knew, if Vader kept this vision going he could get whatever he wanted from you. As long as he let you stay here with Anakin. Tears started filling your eyes once more as you looked at him, his face even more vibrant than it was in your memories. “I wish this was real,” you whimpered, your fingers itching to touch him, but unable to in your secured state. Instead you leaned into his touch, nuzzling against his gloved palm. “All I’ve ever wanted was to see you once last time.”

Then something incredible happened. Anakin reached out, and undid your restraints, catching you in his arms as you collapsed. “This is real! I am real!” He said, squeezing you so tight in his arms he could have broken your ribs, but you didn’t care because it felt so good. You were right back where you belonged, safe, comfortable and free in Anakin’s arms.

Free . . .

He had let you out of your straps. Vader never would have let that happen, even in a vision. It would be too dangerous. Your eyes shifted to the helmet that lay at Anakin’s side, and your world collapsed once more. “No . . .” You murmured, shaking your head. “Please no, no, no,” you murmured the word over and over again, tears dripping down your face in a stream as your hand reached for the helmet, holding the cold metal in your hand. You pulled back enough to look into those eyes, those red and orange eyes that now seemed so different. “Anakin, please tell me you’re not Vader. Tell me you’re not the one -”

“It doesn’t matter,” His hands cupped your cheeks, forcing you to look at him. “It doesn’t matter, don’t you see? You’re alive, and now we can put everything behind us! We can do what we always dreamed of doing -”

There was so much desperation in his voice you felt your heart shattering again. It was too much, trying to reconcile the man you grew up with, the man you loved, with all the things that you knew Vader had done. “You’ve killed so many . . . Killed Jedi . . . People we knew . . . destroyed villages . . .” You couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore. Your emotions were drowning you, burying you underwater with each and every new atrocity that you remembered Vader had committed and bringing you to a conclusion that left a giant, gaping wound in your chest. “Anakin, you’ve become a -”

“No!” The anger and frustration in his voice had you cringing. “Don’t you understand?! I had nothing! Ahsoka was gone, Obi-Wan was gone, you were gone! What was I supposed to do?”

“Not turn to the dark side! Anakin, you’re breaking my heart all over again . . . How could you do those things?” You sobbed, trying to pull away from him when every bone in your body craved to keep being held by him.

His grip became tighter, crushing you to his chest. “You were dead, and it was the Jedi’s fault. They deserved everything they got.”

His words shook you more than anything else he had said. He had done all this . . . Because of you? He had turned to the dark side, destroyed villages, people, tortured hundreds . . . because he thought you were dead.

Despair ripped through your body, as you came to the realization that all of this was your fault. If only you hadn’t believed Obi-Wan when he told you Anakin was dead. If you had gone looking for him yourself instead of escaping to Tatooine to hide from the Empire, none of this might have happened. “But I’m not dead, Anakin . . . I never was.” You looked up once more, meeting his gaze through your tears. “What other lies has the Emperor been telling you?”

You watched as he absorbed your words, but his face was unreadable.

“Lord Vader!” A panicked voice broke through the bubble the two of you had created and you flinched as Anakin’s hand shot out and sent the intruder flying backwards against the wall and pinned him there.

“What do you want?” Anakin hissed at him from behind the chair, and it was then that you realized why he had pushed the guard back in the first place. He hadn’t wanted him to see the two of you.

“Rebels!” The man croaked out, and you glanced over to find Anakin’s hand clenched in a fist, choking the man the same way he had done you. As soon as Anakin saw where your gaze had gone, his fist immediately uncurled. “There are Rebels on the ship. They’re trying to take the bridge!”

You couldn’t even be grateful. You knew who it was. Kanan’s Force presence was getting stronger with every few seconds that passed, but all you could feel was pain, and not just your own either, now that you knew Anakin was alive, you could feel him. Not like earlier, when you had both been Jedi, the dark side shrouded him in too much blackness for that, but you could feel something . . . pain and confusion that echoed yours. “Stay here.” He instructed you, reaching for his mask.

You grasped at his arm, stopping him. “Ani,” you gasped out, the first time the nickname had been directed at him in years made him stiffen. “Please don’t. Please. I’m begging you not to hurt them. They’re trying to save me, that’s it.”

Anakin stared at you and for a moment his gaze softened, but as soon as you had seen it, it vanished again. “You have always been mine. I’m not going to let them take you away from me again.” Anakin leaned forward and you shivered as you felt those soft, familiar lips press against your forehead. “I’ve lost everything. Now that I know you’re alive, I won’t lose you too.”

He stood up, pulling away from you, and placing the mask back on his beautiful face. “You were always mine too, Ani . . . Can you still say that?” You whispered to him.

Anakin didn’t respond, merely stood there and stared down at you for a moment before leaving you, shutting the door behind him.

You collapsed onto the cold, unforgiving floor, you fist hitting it as you screamed and sobbed out your pain. Never had you realized how cruel fate could be. First it had tortured you with his death, and now it had done something even worse. To have him dangling in front of you to snatch him away again was pure torture. It seemed as if you had now lost him even more than you had all those years ago. You were so lost in your own grief you didn’t hear the door opening, didn’t hear the call of your name until you were hauled off the ground and upright. “It’s me! It’s me! We’ve got to get you out of here!” The familiar voice said, shaking you somewhat to grab your attention.

Finally, your vision cleared enough, and you saw the man crouched in front of you, concern in every line of his face. “Kanan . . .” You gasped out, flinging your arms around his neck. “Please, please get me out of here.” You pleaded, clinging to him as if he was your lifeline.

“Hey, it’s okay,” You heard him say, gripping you tightly in his arms. “We’ll get you out of here. The Ghost is waiting.” And without another word, the man lifted you up into his arms as if you weighed nothing. “Sabine! Clear a path!” He called out to the woman you hadn’t even noticed.

Relief filled your body for the briefest moment until you remembered something. If Kanan and Sabine were here . . . “Who’s on the Bridge, Kanan?! He’s going after them! They’ve got to get out of there!” You almost screamed in panic, flailing for a moment as you tried to get out of his arms.

“Nobody!” He tightened his grip on you. “It’s R4 and Chopper! They made a distraction, and then they went back to the ship. Everyone’s safe, we’ve just got to get you out of here.”

You collapsed against him in relief, burying your face in his shirt as you clung to him and closed your eyes. You didn’t want to see anything. You didn’t want to risk seeing him because you knew he must have felt you leaving. Your suspicions were confirmed as Kanan ran up the ramp to the Ghost and it began to close as soon as you were all clear.

He screamed your name, loud and broken through the Force, and it forced your eyes open, staring into those black lenses from across the ship once more until the ramp blocked your view and Hera shot the ship into hyperspace.

Kanan had heard it too. In fact, Ezra, who had joined the two of you, was covering his ears. “What the hell was that?” He asked, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him, all you did was hold on to Kanan, burying your face in his shoulder as more tears fell down your cheeks.

Never had you felt so broken, so tortured, so weak. You had been crushed by everything that had occurred, and you had no idea what to do about it. The only thing that managed to pull you out was a fragile voice. “Mom?”

You lifted your head from Kanan’s shoulder, shock filling your eyes. “What are you doing here?!” You made Kanan put you down, running over to the little boy and gripping his shoulders, checking him over for any injuries.

“He stowed away.” Kanan answered you. “He overheard that you were kidnapped and wanted to make sure you got home. We never let him out of the ship though, I promise.” He assured you.

“Who was that man? That was screaming at you? I felt weird when I saw him . . .”

Leaning forward, you pressed your forehead against your son’s for a moment, and then pulled back, looking into those familiar blue eyes that you had seen the dark version of moments earlier. “Don’t worry about it, Ani. Why don’t you go with Uncle Ezra for a bit. You two can practice lifting stuff, okay?”

Anakin nodded, concern still on his little face, but he allowed Ezra to lead him back up the ladder. You brushed your tears away as you watched them go, turning back to Kanan when you felt his warm hand on your shoulder. “I’ve never seen you like that before . . . What did Vader do to you?”

You placed your hand on top of his, giving it a squeeze. “I’ll tell you later, but first we’ve got to get back to base. I’ve got to talk to Ahsoka.”

#anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker imagine #star wars imagine #Anonymous

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