#child me never saw that coming
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y'know what a great breakfast is? right now? 6am 'i'm feeling like eating non-breakfast food' munchy time? sammich
toasted bagel
lil bit of dijon mustard
buncha jalepeno-laden monterey jack cheez
dry cured black forest salami
sO FUSGHSDGDNKS GUD
(ah dang i could have added pickled banana peppers fffffffff........ next time. next time!)
#foods#sammich#hnnghgh#there's absolutely nothing special about monterey jack cheese: it's just the jalapenos inside it i cRAVE#hnnghghghg#look. LOOK.#i'm not a cheese freak#i'm a jalepeno freak#i see any kind of cheese with goddamn jalepenos inside it? I'M THERE. I'M DEVOURING.#'what about other peppers alyson'#... sure... but jalepeno is so gud and salty and tangy and veggy-ee#oh god i'm a pickled peppers freak#child me never saw that coming#child me didn't even know what pickled peppers were visually#just a weird tongue twister#i've been bamboozled
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they really put alicent in bridgerton blue on the reunion and genuinely expected me to think that she didnāt in fact march all the way to dragonstone to get wifed up? bfr
#I am only a girl living in a society#I make connections#she looks so pretty in blue though I want more#also youāre telling me that rhaenyra saw her walk in all cute looking to not completely crumble at the sight of her?#like my girl got all dolled up for you do something#rhaenyra IS a puppy dog when it comes to those bambi eyes shut up#Alicent was like you think you want her? Iām the love of your life you moron#and rhaenyra is like I KNOW#like sheās been trying to get the other woman to realize that very thing for the last 15+ years#and alicentās all heartbroken like oh so youāre taking her to wife#and rhaenyra is like nO? WHAT?? all dumb and speechless cause jealous alicent was definitely not on her bingo card this year#whilst also having her own mental breakdown#because how on earth is she meant to explain this to her councel#or jace for that matter#that sure was goint to be a fun future conversation to have with her heir#but also Alicent just strutted into the room and started acting like a scorned wife?#which left rhaenyra feeling like the asshole parent who stopped paying for child support after the divorce#but also she never wanted a divorce in the first place?? and alicent doesnāt seem to get this?#like sheās already figuring out how to most efficiently empty daemonās chambers for the woman to move in permanently#but alicentās still yapping off about not having a place in court anymore and fleeing across the sea#and rhaenyra canāt help the bitter taste in her mouth as she states how that ship came in a little too late for them and it is messyyyy#hotd leaks#house of the dragon leaks#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#rhaenicent#alicent hightower#rhaenyra targaryen#bridgerton
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DP x DC
not me thinking about imaginary scenarios of ten year old Tim Drake in the ghost zone (pariahās castle)
where Tim thinks itās strangely soothing that despite being the only one whose steps connect to the ground, thereās not that eerie silence that befell drake manor
strange blob creatures chitter softly and nip at his hair and swooshes and wisps of wind betray the presence of an invisible ghost
which after following he realizes itās almost like heās trailing after the black dark shadow that is batman again
which gives him the idea that, maybe, just this one time, he can play the part of robin
that in mind Tim makes out a game of sneaking to the side of ghosts that look like theyāre brooding and if they can spot him he loses
most just grunt in response (very in character) while others fuss over him and ask questions which Tim uses to infodump
he also politely asks the ghost that always asks him how heās doing to instead say the word āreportā
(the ghost looks at him weirdly but humors him and besides the answer would be the same anyways)
Tim also(!!)
gets on the case of why the walls lack tangibility when he is the one leaning on them (he doesnāt live down the time he wanted to look cool only to fall through the wall)
hyperfixates on how gravity works in the ghost zone because he couldnāt do a skateboard trick he has pulled off many many times and heās salty about it
tries to figure out where they are getting human food from (cause itās hot enough to be homemade but also thereās no kitchen āso how could it be) (also he wants coffee)
finds out the dude that often gives him a side eye when he finds that Tim knows how to do something (math homework), is next in line for the throne and yet doesnāt have a single āmingle and talk people upā bone in his body. (despite it his networking is a solid 7/10)
gets a ghost horse to adopt him what
discovers pretty quickly that there are rooms to which he canāt phase through (a.k.a. heās not allowed entry) to which he begrudgingly backs off even though that stands in his way of doing a very thorough layoutā¢ of the place (robin would)
sulks over the lack of extreme sports in the place
(Danny takes him to the Far Frozen where they go tire sliding in the snow and where tim learns how to use a skateboard skate and also that ghost ice cream is just as good as normal ice cream)
sulks again cuz he caught a common cold
also because thereās no sun or moon poor Timmyās already screwed sleep schedule gets more messed up to the point no one knows when or where he will fall asleep
(ghosts find him in the most unhinged of places with a signature purple cloak draped over him every. single. time.)
overall, be a menace
see-> the time he threatened to build ghost weapons heād somehow memorized the blueprints of cause Danny wouldnāt let him visit the radium girls factory but yes the renaissance period
see-> that time he went through the whole ghost energy and how to work with it book section in the library and half an hour later had a prototype of a star wars laser beam made
(note: bribing only works for hot chocolate, not for letting him keep cool-looking guns)
just tim having the time of his life
clockwork being no help at all (the ghost loves being a cryptid)
and danny trying not to get attached while he progressively gets more concerned over this chaos child he emotionally adopted as his little brother
(to fit canon cause i want it to this would just be until Danny finds the dimension little Timmy is from, then they can safely yeet the child back to the moment he first went missing)
anyways before anyone knows itās been three months
#tim drake#danny phantom#dp x dc au#batman#dc#dp x dc#danny fenton#like this little guy practiced with ghosts#which donāt breathe#tim comes back to gotham and can sneak up to batman better than an assassin#donāt make sound on the floor if they donāt want#and have heightened senses#you are gonna tell me that in all the bats career they never saw the little tiny child that followed them around with a camara??#whelp now you got an explanation as to why#also upon realizing Danny didnāt know anything about how to mingle Tim who has been going to galas for years self appoints himself#to teach him donāt frett#little headcannons in my own au#this in my head is fic#itās more extensive but it was getting long#i was going through some mental hoops to find the correlation between his hobby and tim this time deciding to be robin#instead of the shadow chasing AFTER Batman#but basically itās because this time tim had someone to make of Batman#heās not alone#and heās a kid#he wants to play#and now that he can play With someone of course Timmy is gonna chose his hero
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#prefacing this with I Know Spanish. i cant not know spanishā my parents don't speak english#but im the only one of my siblings that didnt get to go to school over there š²š½ (just pre school)#adn the thing is like. my siblings wld talk to me in eng of course#(if they talked to me at all! what do u say to a baby when you're 9 12 and 15 yrs older.)#and my parents wld similarly jst not talk to me? i did not have conversations with them from birth to now lol.#thjere is something about how like. my sisters kids are also learning the languages at the same time#but when they mess up in spanish theyre correctedā by my sister (their mom)ā my other sisterā my parents#why not Me. why wasnt that extended to Me as a child...#the same reason I have the least amount of baby pictures while my siblings all have one full book each i bet#the same reason why my and my eldest sister are 15 yrs apart LOL#igts so crazy to me. i hate mentioning this bc people assume#im one of those ppl who isnt fluent bc their parents speak english and spanish and never taught them#my parents dont speak englishāāāā#my nephew thats older than me who is my fave family member and also only speaks spanish#is coming up on sunday idk that i can fully carry convo with him!#pure spanglish bc i didnt grow up having convos in it writing it reading it#thats why im so desperate to read books in spanish now. im so deeply ashamed#igts so crazy. i hate it.#saw a comment on smthng the other day thats like ''idk how u can have parents that only speak spanish and not know it lol''#well can you take a guess. can u take a guess as to how that would happen via interactions. lack thereof.#idk why but its even more embarrassing this way. genuinely how cld u not know...?#its like i was born to feel isolated from my family in every single way...youngest by so many years#the language thing. the Hates Eating thing. the trans thing. most severe failure to launch#im so embarrassed to be alive....!#and i dont belong anywhere. and i am Alone wherever I am.#abandoned by direct and distant relatives. ancestors.
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#bonus extra forms under the cut#burmy#i guess it's not technically a Bonus but it is three images in one post. anyway why is trash-form burmy pink#i never understood this. i'd hear about trash form and go wow it must be like. black and brown with marks of trash all over it and cool#like trubbish. but they just made it pretty pink and cute. how? why? why would a creature that lives in the trash become bright pink#āthat hot pink bitch is named breakfastā et cetera#i dunno. whenever i see burmy i think of that one clip from detective pikachu where it's just like#burmy! burmymymy! burmyā¦ burmy :( and pikachu is like WOAH WHAT THE FUCK#i've never played detective pikachu. i should. i probably will go back and play the original once the one on the switch comes out#i saw the movie though. but i don't think that's. anywhere related to the games. to be honest. i also remember going and seeing it in#the theater and it was fucking. meā my momā and one other parent/child duo and that's IT. NO one was there in the theater to see it#and we literally just went to go see it on a fuckin. whim. we were driving byā looking for something to doā and saw that a random theater#was showing detective pikachu. and we just said Fuck It. and it was cool but she kept asking me about every pokĆ©mon during the movie#and then it had that really weird ableist villain that was fucked up but the pokĆ©mon were cute
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(OLD OC SKETCHES) Meet Sunnabelle Von Sunnoviche, final daughter of the Sunnoviche family. Peeking from behind a window, she witnessed a wizards final spell, one that reduced the world to a wasteland. Her noble blood damned her to [HELL], but unwanting to suffer with her family, she made a deal with the devil. She now hunts in his name. The top of her head was taken by the blast on that day. The fires of her spirit have boiled her blood into a super-heated plasma.
#luckys original content#GRAAHH MY OCS OCS IM SORRY MY OCS I NEVER FUCKIN DRAWW YYAALLL#i was cleanin stuff on my pc again n found a buncha stray doodles of her that i made like. 1 or 2 yrs ago. so i cooked em into smth edible#shes a gunslinger rogue i think! mechanically aasimar bc plasma blood#played her once for a very teeny tiny improved oneshot me n some buddies did forever ago#would love to play as her again... someday a cowboy themed game will find me.. n she will live again...#SUNNABELLE VON SUNNOVICHE! the last name was sposed to sound like 'son of a bitch' ehehehe#bc she is ONE HELL ofa son ofa bitch. shes mean shes short tempered she takes NO SHIT#and she loses her mmIIIIND when she meets a delightfully stupid pretty person#i didnt play her for long so her personality hasnt evolved that far. thats the fun thing abt playing characters! u meet them when u play em#SUNNABELLE FUNFACTS: she is the 6th child of 11 siblings. middlest a middle child can be. bc o this she was often overlooked or ignored#she grew up in a family of obnoxiously rich nobles. all the other siblings were trained and focused on to be the best a sunnoviche can be#meanwhile. sunnabelle often stuck to herself. drawing and creating little fantasy worlds. was always a fan of wild wests n cowboys n guns#she was the only one that saw the WIZARD coming. she was peering over a window when the blast went off. taking the top of her head#GUHH IM ACTULY SO PROUDA HER DESIGN SHE LOOKS SO COOL.. LIKE WHATS WITH THE PLASMA HOW DID I DRAW THAT SO WELL. IM SO PROUD.#I lov all the sun symbolism.. its so fun.. what a fun character ive made.. hell yeah.... anyway hope u guys like her too.#if u got questions ive got ANSWERS!!! my askbox is always open. im pretty sure.
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Dysprosium, Mary Soon Lee
dysprosium, AN 66, is a silvery-white rare earth metal. its name is derived from the greek dysprositos, meaning āhard to get atā, owing to the difficulty in separating and isolating this rare earth element. dysprosium is used to measure neutron flux, to fuel reactors, and to activate phosphors. terfenol-d is a magnetorestrictive alloy, meaning that it changes shape when a magnetic field is applied, and is used to manufacture underwater acoustic systems.
jason āroboā robertson, dallas stars #21 for @simmyfrobbyās nhl periodic table poems <3
#i had a couple different ideas for poems that were taken by the time i could go deranged for a couple hours to make this but as I looked#i was like WAIT NONE OF YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE JASON ROBERTSON YOU HAVENāT SEEN MY TEXAS CAM and had to do it. also was STRUCK with the#sudden immaculate vision of the Dallas D as part of terfenol-D and could not get it out & robo is the most dance! person i know on the team#liv in the replies#dallas stars#jason robertson#nhl periodic table poems#guys i am plagued with visions and no execution skills!! every day i come here and learn one new skill on GIMP the way god intended!!!#today it was emboss. also cannot claim any credit for the pulse to the magnetic beat photo which is so cool that was one where i had a#couple and was like maybe i can do like crayon shockwaves like the art process video kasper showed? and then found that picture and was#like thank you lord stanley for knowing my limitations. thank you for your understanding in this moment it was a trial enough to make#expand contract dance and one would THINK i would have fucking learned from the claude animorphs tragedy!! i did not. but i did use the#shear tool and 3D rotate so at least if weāre animorphing itās SLIGHTLY better. anyway me frantically doing this like WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT#WAIT FOR ME YOU GUYS ARE SO FAST i keep seeing all of these and just spinning around in circles until i get dizzy & fall down Iām so happy#the drive folder for this is just called joy!!!!! because joy this is such a cool idea but now because it brings me so much joy#i just saw the Travis dermott one and burst into tears super normal AND someone did exactly what i wanted with hydrogen which was the water#the ice!!!!! itās so perfect!!! and cody ofc did silver lord stanley. like does it ever make you cry how beautiful & creative everyone is?#anyway if you see me post and delete this and then update it or change it no you didnāt itās fine. but i wanted to be included#if i could make the dysprosium letters not have a white background i would I simply could not fuck with it at 1AM. we are hitting send#it may not look like it but i queue#pretend i spoke at length about the reasons why i picked all the pictures & the element just know that itās there inside my brain u can ask#GUYS I TAKE IT ALL BACK I SAW NEONFRETRAāS ISOTOPES AND I COULD MAKE THE EDITS EVEN THOUGH THEYāRE THERE!! ISOTOPES!!!! YOU GUYS!!!!!!#get ready for the edits then. dylan magnesium my beloved child of stars who can never returnā¦ like i wish i could say anyone else but itās#i KNOW number nineteens bismuth donāt make me Google how many years nolan played hockey but also thereās ej for stable so.. also half-life#actinium claude giroux my belovedā¦ when i saw there already was a claude i thought maybe Brady too for that#I donāt know how but flerovium doubled magic is percolating in my brain as was promethium bad boy because I was like hmmm. tyler. but#couldnāt commit and THEN SOMEONE DID BAD BAD LEROY BROWN TYLER BERTUZZI TO PROMETHIUM AND BESTIE I AM KISSING YOU ON THE MOUTH!!! with cons#anyway shane wright germanium with juraj slafkovskĆ½ but showing him very obviously not missing it. if jack eichel was not an asshole#the narratives WOULD be narrativing. you could argue for a sidovi here with the calder cup and potentially a best friend stealing narrative#(the most recent is cam yorkeās acquisition of jamie d from trevor zegras which would then require a yorkie one for silicon the other side)
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this isn't gonna win me any friends but I won't pay a dime to see movies made by/starring people who signed the petition to free convicted child rapist roman polanski, and that includes guillermo del toro and wes anderson. you can love their movies all you want but paying to see them puts money in the pocket of people who publicly support rapists going free. š¤·š¾āāļø
#idk it's cut and dry to me#and if you're PUBLIC in supporting rapists then like....what kinda shit you doing in private? š¤#most of the arguments i see are ppl going ābut it was so LONG ago he's done his timeā no he literally hasn't#that's uh the problem#he was convicted n then FLED the country to avoid prison#mf literally never did his time. he never faced justice.#āhasn't he suffered enoughā literally no he hasn't#that man drugged and raped a child and plead GUILTY to it and then never saw a day of prison#he should be dead but go off#and before you come at me with āyknow x and y actor signed it too what about them?ā bitch what about em? none of them getting my money!#not a goddamn one!#natalie portman was one of the only ones to sign and then admit she fucked up and take her name off#if she can do it then so can anyone else. they just actively choose not to.#āthey were probably misledā ok well its 2023 the knowledge is public and google is free#maybe its time to walk that support back huh
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HOLY
SHIT
YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO GO SO FUCKING HARD GOD DAMN.
YEAAAAAAAAAAAA. VIOLENCE VIOLENCE VIOLENCE VIOLENCE. GET HER ASS
#ask#NOT ENOUGH PEOPLE USE THE FACT THAT DALV WAS KANAKO'S BESTIE FOR ANGST WITH CEROBA AND CHUJIN#DO YOU KNOW THE TYPE OF TEA A TODDLER SPILLS ABOUT THEIR FAMILY??#''oh yeah my mom loves to drink adult sodas on the weekends! ive tried asking her to let me try them but she always says no :(''#''of course you can come over!! mom and dad are basically never home so we can hang out for hours. huh? whats a babysitter? never had one''#HE KNOWS THE FUCKING DIRT#ALSO. THE DRAWINGS ON THE PILLARS IN THE RUINS#DALV IS THE ONLY ONE WHO COULDVE DRAWN THEM#MEANING THAT DALV SAW AXIS FUCKING OBLITERATE A CHILD#HELL HE PROBABLY SAW THE ROBOT IN CHUJIN'S HOUSE IF HE EVER CAME OVER#HE KNOWS KANAKO'S DAD BUILDS KILLER ROBOTS. HE HAS MORE DIRT ON THEM THAT THEY COULD EVER REALISE#iilmunchkin
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GIRL......................... suspension of disbelief I know but.
Obviously you can pick out a BUNCH of the dragons as that Is an ongoing trope (dragons aging differently than humans, so they can look younger than they "actually are") (also while I did try to avoid including them to make them more comparable to Nino, I think Flayn can fit in either category for the purposes of The Context -- esp cause her dragon blood is meant to be secret)
Not only do we have Heroes skewing younger (a lot fitting into another trope of What If There Was A Baby Sister) we also have Baby Banner. Where the whole point is they are baby.
LIKE....... maybe I'm speaking way too soon and maybe the whole point IS this will backfire LMFAO, but it IS absurd to be presented with her art (which, def still looks youthful!) and having her say yeah I can pass as a kidnapped child. Which COULD be true! But also what do you mean no one is going to know you're a part of the Heroes. Why is no one fighting her on this. Not even including the dragons there are like a handful of Heroes who fit into her exact vibe. Some even MORE baby than her.
#fire emblem#feh#and that's not even factoring in charas like nyx (who's whole thing is she 'looks younger' than she is)#which. tbh. i personally never saw even in fates. like. that's just a short small woman. they do exist.#and adding to that are the other charas who read as short small women to me like celine (before i knew her in-game age is 17)#and eitri#and also youthful charas who are treated as younger yes but also as full fledged adults in their own right. like lissa#(treatment mostly comes from chrom tbh which is understandable LMFAO)#OH and that's not even looking at all the second gen/child units from awakening/fates/other games that include that#which i think is just genealogy and thracia??? i'm not familiar enough w those titles though#also like. in general. a lot of fe charas who have official ages are teens. nino is 15. i think ike was like 16 in por????#which like! still a kid! but also! idk even what the difference is. is it just that ones a sweet looking girl#and the other is a boy who was trained to kill for as long as he's been alive (very lovingly by the rare good dad in fe)#i mean. i guess that makes a difference.#OH MAN I COULD HAVE INCLUDED LYSITHEA INSTEAD OF FLAYN. ALSO fits the bill perfectly#VERONICA WAS 13 WHEN WE MET HER AND SHE HAS ALWAYS BEEN CONSIDERED TO BE A CATEGORY 10 THREAT#SORRY i'm nitpicking like crazy LMFAOOOO but like. the people of askr should not be fazed by anything anymore.#and you would think whoever is causing problems like bandits or what have you. you'd think they'd adapt.#SANAKI. ALSO. WHO IS WHY WE KNOW VERONICA'S AGE ROUGHLY IN THE FIRST PLACEā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļøā¼ļø#okay i swear i'm done now. good by forevwr š#fe nino
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i am feeling emotions
#went out just with dad for work and there was an accident and i saw this man covering the eyes of his both kids like yk#trying to make them look away worried#and then there's us who haven't properly looked at each other for 15+ days now#more like i didn't but i had my reasons and we barely even speak except when it's absolutely necessary or academic related#and i was just hoping this got over soon so we'll not have to be so awkward and close to each other#and then i see those kids with their father it's like#when was the last time you ever voluntarily tried to protect me from something when it actually mattered or when it did not relate to your#dreams like i don't even remember having you in my childhood#like there was a man who visited us for a month or two in a year and i thought i knew him and i thought i loved him but all that love was#literally me trying not to get in your way or make you angry trying to be proper perfect adult child so once in a while you could and go#yes i approve of you#i remember asking you that when was the last time you actually willfully asked me if i was okay and your response was well you're never okay#so what's there to ask must've been a very small thing for you but it wasn't for me#and i stopped expecting after that dw but it's even worse now#sorrys come in form of food or books or indirect remarks but sigh why am i even thinking about this#dni#mine
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as a woman, i have so much empathy for my mother and everything she went through. as a daughter, i don't think i'll ever be able to forgive her for everything she put me through.
#trauma#i was raised by a mom who refused to acknowledge that she hurt me#i was also raised by a mother whose trauma is as completely valid as mine#the fact that she went through so much does not excuse her abusive and manipulative behavior#but her trauma is not invalidated by the fact that she abused her children#i'll probably never forgive her for always seeing me as her property and never as a person#and i've made peace with the fact that i may never have a mother#i'm human and she was supposed to treat me as such#but she never did and i'll probably never be able to come back from that#i was her child and she only ever saw me as someone else to make her life difficult#she might have loved me but she never liked me
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Honestly I think Dean Highbottom has some shit to answer to as well. The mockery, the derision, the outright admittance that he was hoping Coriolanus would fail and the Snow family would continue to suffer. How someone who loathed the Games still treated a young man with cruelty because of the past, because of social divides that would be so easy to tear down. In the end, it wasnāt just Gaul who shaped Snow into the man he became. So bitter and hateful. So incapable of compassion and forgiveness. Just like his father. Just like his Dean.
#like yeah there were a lot of things questionable about Snow even before he was chosen as a mentor in the games#but like. damn. you didnāt even consider the idea he could be better than his father did you?#the way kindness could have unravelled some of the hate in Snowās heart#listen to me tell you the horrible things your father did. listen to me tell you that you can be different. you are not the past.#the divides between us do not truly exist. look at the weapon in your hand. it is real. and it can do real damage#but if you never hate someone - if they never fool you into letting violence into your heart - they can never make you use it#it breaks my heart. how could you hate a ghost so much that youād kill a child. I donāt know. but the Dean does. and so does Snow.#the cycles run and run until somebody stops. and burns some bread. and shares berries. and takes an arrow. and says no more. I love you#it is difficult. it could hurt me. it could be the very last thing I do. it may not even serve me well. but I love you. I love. always.#how pathetic hate makes you. how strong love makes you. like staring at the Dean and staring at characters like Haymitch#like two substance abusing men who know the system inside out. who are complicit. who are victims. both embittered and angry.#but one saw a child and decided to punish him for the past#and the other saw a child and decided - okay. itās been 23 years. my heart hurts. I want to give in. I want to hate you. I want to not care.#Iām going to care anyway. Iām in so much pain. Itās killing me. Iām going to care anyway. about you both. it wonāt be perfect. but I care.#and Iāll be here through hell. and I will fuck up. so fucking badly. because Iām still addicted and angry and god knows I have suffered.#god knows these hands are bloody and they always will be. but I will keep coming back. I will keep trying. I will still love.#and in the end I will write names in a book that belongs to you and I will find a little bit of peace in a house where the sun shines#and the geese make ridiculous noises in the yard. and love will have seen me through.#HAYMITCH YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS I LOVE YOU MY IMPERFECT DARLING#dean highbottom#coriolanus snow#the hunger games#a ballad of songbirds and snakes#haymitch abernathy#thg#abosas#suzanne collins#SHE WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS
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maybe Im just being miserable again but I firmly believe that children are only ever praised for not annoying adults and nothing else
#just saw (reblogged) a poll on this topic so Im finally posting about this#like come on#smart - doesnāt need attention from teachers#mature - you already know#quiet - self explanatory#never seen a child actually being praised for being kind to their friends#unless they resolved a problem that an adult would otherwise have to have sorted#maybe I just didnāt hang around with nice people when I was young#do kids get praised for being brave or something like that???? no idea#text post#my rambles#cw me being miserable
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i'm Scared to continue the p.aul da.no filmography bc that means having a whole lot of f/os on my list and that's;;;... 2-3 are portrayed by him already making me feel overwhelmed /j
#it's lots of the same guy.#louis iv.es i'm coming after you next#the ones i've never even CONSIDERED are... obvious.#alex (i'd feel weird) calvin (i hate him) dwayne (that's a child in my eyes what the fuck don't ask me no stupid question)#there's somebody i'm forgetting. but i'm sure there's one more#anyway#lily.txt#FUCKIN!!! REMEMBERED. pierre. nah i saw some things abt him and.. eeek. no.
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If anyone relates to this even just a little bit, then I'm so sorry.
#ā¢ luna lavinchi speaking ā¢#living with cptsd#cptsd vent#complex ptsd#diet culture trauma#monsters inside me#toxic health culture#ex vegitarian/vegan#emotional flashbacks#health documentaries#dark side of veganism#i should have never been forced to watch these as a child..my mind wasn't ready to understand the information nor tell what was real or not#-i cant try sushi or even think about fish without feeling physically sick and dizzy. i haven't had McDonald's since i was like 6ish years-#-old..i never wanted to share this information but i need to vent. I feel embarrassed and rude for not liking a food chain that most of the#-population does. Smelling or seeing McDonald's makes me wanna puke so bad because of everything those documentaries would say.#I will never be able to eat McDonald's in my life because of how sick and terrified i feel when thinking about the food even the drinks-#-scare the shit out of me. I'm so pissed that I'm triggered. All of the sudden i smell something in the house that smells like McDonald's-#-then the memories come flooding back and i feel like puking so back so i cant even eat dinner. i know this may seem stupid but i am-#-genuinly scared. Im tired of this shit and tired of feeling alone in this.#(anyway sorry. if you read my vent then i appreciate you)#tw food talk#tw diet culture#tw vent in tags#(dont even get me started on parasites cause thats a whole fucking trauma itself. damn it i hate it all. i hate it so much)#(also note: my therapist made me feel so validated weeks ago when i told her during my session that i was traumatized by monsters inside me-#-she literally knew the name of the show before i could even say its name. and she said she also cant watch it and that she saw it as an-#-adult who doesn't have ocd. so she told me she can't even imagine how terrified i was to watch it as a child who was developing ocd.-#-therapist W)
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