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AHHHHHH
#this post brought to you by: me#i. applied for a preapproval letter for a mortgage yesterday. and spoke to a realtor to start finding me houses#i want to move several states away which further complicated things. but the houses there are CHEAP#like under 100k for a 2 bedroom move in ready#anyways i got approved for 80k with a 20k down payment. and im FREAKING THE FUCK OUT#and because i got that pre app letter i have a loan officer calling me today to talk#and we literally work at the same bank so i can SEE that hes active and hasnt read my message#even though its been 45 minutes. KEVIN MESSAGE ME BACK. IM NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO FOCUS UNTIL I DO THIS CALL#AHHHHHHH S C R E A M. it might happening!!!! i might be finally.mov8ng out in a few months!!!#i mgiht be a HOMEOWNER by the end of the year#i have been saving money for this since i was. 16? 17?#ive had a good well paying job since i was 18.#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#once i have a house then i start job searching in that area. and start getting really serious about LEAVING my very good job#which is soooo scary. this job was supposed to be my lifelong career. but then everyone fucking moved to other states and left me behind#so theres no point staying here.#i might never have this kind of job security again.#but also my realtor said that theres a lot of bank jobs in that area so maybe itll be easy to find something#on the fence on if i tell my parents that im Making Moves right now#on one hand its hard to not talk about it becuae im STRESSED TF OUT#but on the other hand when i tentatively mentioned the state i want to move to#richard started yelling and swearing el oh el#might be better to wait and avoid the tension as long as possible?#but also i dont know how they can stay angry when its literally my best option#the other places where my friends live either have 0 opportunity and high housing prices. or are even moe liberal than where im going#idk. why do half of my problems come down to âmy parents will be madâ like im a 12 year old or something. shit fucking sucks#this is why i want to get out of here#also it feels weird and bad to talk to my friends about how stressed i am about buying a house when all of them are stressed about#not being able to make rent or something. my problems feel like a brag in a really odd and shitty way. but hey!#if this works out maybe ill start being stressed about how im going to make my mortgage payments! :') yay!
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1.13 acres in Elko, Nevada for $6,400
#nevada#real estate#realestate#realtors#land#properties#real estate investing#property for sale#investing#landforsale#landcentury#vacant land#cheap land#land for sale
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130 sqm Lot Krystal Homes San Fernando
Invest in your future! This 130 sqm lot in Krystal Homes, San Fernando, Pampanga is the perfect opportunity to build your dream home or invest in a prime location. Contact us today! #JMListings
đ Krystal Homes Brgy Alasas, City of San Fernando Pampanga Property Features TYPE: Residential Land đ Lot: 130 square meters đď¸ NEARBY POINTS OF INTEREST Rapide San Fernando Pampanga â Auto Service, Car Repair â˘Â Lourdes Heights â˘Â Petron â˘Â Our Lady of Fatima University â˘Â Pag-IBIG Fund â San Fernando Branch â˘Â Suburbia Business Center â˘Â Victoria Court San Fernando â˘Â Universal Robina CorporationâŚ
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5 Benefits To Choose Orion Housing
Central Location for Academic Success
If you are a student living in Los Angeles then you are lucky. Orion Housing provides housing for students in Los Angeles because Orion Housing is very beneficial for site centers, which means easy access to schools, universities, and colleges.Â
This practice reduces transportation needs for its students who will then have to minimize looking for alternative transportation.
Stylish Living Without Hassle
If you want stylish living without hassle then Orion housing is always available. Orion Housing provides that pleasurable experience of a beautifully decorated and well-maintained apartment through our move-in ready property model.Â
Convenience at Your Fingertips
Staying with Orin Homes is just as close as reaching that oasis in the desert becoming accessible to you firsthand. The locations we select are those with good sceneries and close to the market, restaurants, shopping malls, and transport interchanges. So, everything is actually available when you are on our property with little inconvenience.
Safety and Security
At the moment we desire and provide exceptional trips and thatâs why we pay great attention to your safety and sheer enjoyment and we do everything possible to show you what it is really worth.Â
The property team of Orion installed modern technology in all sections and consisted of secure entry systems, surveillance cameras, and guards, on-site at times. Perhaps it is right in there, as a relaxing day in the privacy and safety of your Orion Housing home.
Exceptional Service
The most that our community enhances is the fact that what we provide to the residents will always go beyond what they can usually imagine.
If you are a customer who values time and has some real and justified emergencies, then the service technicians who work fast and care to make sure that you have your needs at the time you express them are a perfect match for you.Â
Along with the high focus on customer satisfaction Orion Housing is also committed to offering housing for students in Los Angeles the finest services that exceed the levels expected from them.
#realtors in los angeles#housing for students in los angeles#los angeles realty companies#cheap one bedroom apartments los angeles#little houses for sale near me#low housing near me#affordable rental housing near me
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Don't suppose there's any elderly homeowners out there who'd like to leave me a house in their will?
#I hate renting#every time I get anywhere CLOSE to saving up enough to even THINK about applying for a home loan#the cost of houses goes up AGAIN#all the cheap places keep getting snatched up by the local realtor#and I'm constantly scared I'll get kicked out of this place cause#whenever it comes time to renew my lease they're all#oh you'll be staying absolutely no problem#but then spring a surprise inspection on me where they say the owner has been thinking about selling for the last two years#then renew my lease anyway and act like I should be grateful I get to stay and my rent only went up by another fifty bucks#ARGH#complaining about life ignore me
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Godrej Properties | Leading Real Estate Developer in India.
Godrej Properties is a leading real estate developer in India that offers a wide range of luxury residential and commercial developments. We provide a sustainable design.
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gojo satoru x reader | fake marriage au [18+]
in holy matriphony ch4. in a motherâs eyes
á° pairing. fake marriage au - neighbor&realtor!gojo x nurse!reader (ft. choso x reader & suguru x reader)
á° summary. gojo satoru is your extremely annoying next-door-neighbor who you're pretty sure is the most insufferable man you've ever met. given the fact that you exclusively work the night shift at a chaotic emergency dept, just got broken up with your boyfriend of seven years, and have been taking care of your sick mother ever since her multitude of diagnoses, yet somehow your neighbor is the main source of stress in your life should speak volumes. but when your mother's medical bills start to skyrocket to more than you can manage, and you learn that said neighbor of yours has the best private health insurance plan in the country, you ask him to enter a matrimonial agreement with you for the spousal benefits all in the name of saving a few hundred thousand dollars. but you'll have to see if suffering cohabitation w him is worth any amount of money.
á° genre/tags. fluff, smut, angst, enemies to lovers (sort of), annoyances to lovers (that's more like it), small town romance, fake marriage, next door neighbors, lots of bickering, suburban shenanigans, slow burn, mutual pining, gojo likes to play house but you don't, hatred for the american healthcare system, gojo always forgets to mow the lawn, jealousy, an insane amount of profanity, mentions of cigarettes, depression/anxiety; btw gojo in this fic is in his mid 30s n reader is in her late 20s
á° warnings. reader in this fic has a sick mother w alzheimer's & cancer so there is secondary medical angst!!
á° chapter. 4/x
á° words. 10k (omg a whole number...very sexy)
a/n. hellooo my ihm friends! hope you're all doing well. ahh i'm glad to finally be posting this chapter lolol. it's a littleee off tangent from what happens in ch3, but still has some important plot developments. it does dive into feelings of depression & anxiety, so just wanted to give a warning on that! but yea other than that i hope you enjoy and see you at the bottom!! :) also so sorry if there are errors i only had time to skim through it once :((
nav. ch1 :: ch2 :: ch3 :: ch4 :: ch5 (pending)
âJust go ahead and sign right here for me.â
You take the pen from the hospice nurseâs hand. Itâs cheap black plastic with a pink fuzzy pom pom attached to the end of it with peeling glue.Â
Your eyes briefly flit across the paragraphs detailed in printed ink until your gaze lands on the highlighted lines at the bottom of the page. Your signature. Spouseâs signature.
âWeâll need to have your husband come here to sign the paperwork as well, since heâll have to add your mother on his list of dependents, but we can certainly get started on expediting this process for you since the insurance has already been pre-approved,â the nurse tells you as she accepts your signed paperwork and then neatly tucks it into one of the compartment holders.Â
The afternoon goes by smoothly, with your mother surprisingly patient as she sits in the waiting room while you wait for the nurses to formally show you to her new room.
You thought that you could put off putting her in hospice for a little longer, because in all honesty, you werenât prepared to let her go just yet. You werenât prepared to not have her in the house anymore. But lately, sheâs been putting herself in lots of danger, like attempting to take her own medications when she does not know the correct dosing, and forgetting things on the stove when she attempts to cook.
But the last straw was when you came home from a very brief run to the grocery store at night a couple days ago to see a handful of your neighbors out on the front lawn with your mother at their side. She had apparently gotten out of the house and walked down the neighborhood, then fallen on the sidewalk but was unable to get up. When your neighbors had found her, a miracle as they were just coming home from dinner and caught sight of her in the illumination of their headlights, they tried to help her get up but she couldnât. She couldnât even tell the firefighters that came by to help her what her name was, or what year it was, or where she lived.
It was when you realized you couldnât even keep her safe anymore that you had to let go.
âIs that a wedding ring?â your mother asks, pointing a trembling finger to it as she lays tucked inside her new hospice bed, âare you married?â
You glance down at the ring Gojo gave you in the courthouse, almost surprised to find that you were still wearing it in good faith. âYes, mom. I am.â
âWhy am I here?â she asks you, âI donât want to be here.â
You stiffen a little. Although you were mentally preparing yourself to answer these questions, the preparation didnât make it any easier. âI know. Iâm sorry. Itâs just for a little short while, okay? The doctors want to run some tests on you.â
âWho are you married to?â she asks.
âTo Satoru,â you tell her, âour neighbor.â
She lets out a small gasp. âThe sweet boy who fixed our A/C?â
You roll your eyes. not sure why your mother has hyper fixated on that memory with Gojo when most days sheâll look at you like youâre a stranger. âYes mom.â
âOh, I like him,â she tells you with an affectionate nod. She hesitates slightly, wearisome of some other thought that flashes through her mind. âHow long have you been married?â
You let out a small sigh. This is already a conversation you had with her a couple days ago, and it doesnât feel good to lie to her. It was hard enough to do once, but to have to constantly lie to her over and over again over all the smallest things just so that she stays calm and safe and happy seems to drain you of all your energy and happiness you had left in your bones.
Little white lies, thatâs what they are. Harmless ones. Thatâs what you tell yourself to absolve yourself of the guilt.
âIâll come back soon, okay? Iâll tell you more about him some other day,â you say to her, speaking gently in the way an adult would speak to a child. The way she used to speak to you. You could never exactly pinpoint when those roles became reversed.
You finish discussing some more insurance matters with the front-desk nurse as she puts together a small folder of documents for you. While she works, you glance at the little counter shelf that includes a plethora of pamphlets on how to deal with the complicated feelings that arise from putting a loved one in hospice care, and dealing with the emotions of having a relative with advanced stage dementia. They are pretty brochures, lovingly creased at the folds as if looked through multiple times by people who walk in and out of this facility, but seemingly only few take them home. You slip one of each into your folder when the nurse hands it to you, manage the best smile possible, and then turn on your heel to head out the hospice doors.
The sun is setting outside as you take the walk back to your car, which was purposefully parked a half mile away to afford you the luxury of a melancholic stroll. Somehow, you feel like youâve left a piece of yourself back at the hospice. A feeling you canât quite shake from your bones.
Your feet stop walking somewhere along the sidewalk on their own, the street lights above you flickering brighter into life as the sky is now a dusty gray with only streaks of purple. Thereâs a liquor store you spot across a small parking lot to your right, and youâre guided towards it, but not without a sickening feeling in your chest.
When you open the door, the bell at the top jingles, and you glance to the right where you see a lanky young man playing some sort of shooter game on his phone by the cash register. You grab a bottle of vodka, a bottle of white wine, some packs of skittles, one of the mini pizza boxes at the hot food station, and then dump it all onto the counter.
The young man scans all your items without even so much as sparing you a glance, but does take a look at your ID, then says, âTotalâs $68.65, cash or card?â
âCard.â
Just before you tap your card, something displayed behind the cashier counter catches your eye. Something familiar, something tempting, something you weigh in your head about twenty times within one millisecond all due to the cortisol coursing through your veins and you eventually say, âUh, and could I get one of those, too?â
The cashier looks behind himself to what youâre pointing at before turning around. âSure.â
The same jingle is heard on top of your head as you leave the store, now with a burning hot mini pizza box in your hand as well as a plastic bag that carries your candy and the two clinking bottles of alcohol.
âOh!! omg, y/n,â you hear a feminine voice call out and youâre instantly wincing. The last thing you wanted was to be bothered right now. You just wanted to go home and get drunk and then pass out on the floor of your living room. But alas, the world is small.
You turn around to see Hana come running across the sidewalk lot towards you, and when sheâs about a few feet away, she glances down at your hands and all the things you were carrying. You quickly shove your last-minute purchase into your jacket pocket with a shameful conscience, and try to hide the plastic bag of liquor behind your calves. There was no hiding the pizza box, but at least that was the least incriminating.
âOh, Hana, wow! What a coincidence seeing you here,â you say to her, pressing your lips into a small smile.
âYeah, I um,â she points over her shoulder towards the hospice thatâs standing tall in the darkness of night, cells with windows illuminated with light. If you didnât know any better, you would think it was a prison. âRemember I told you my friendâs mom is sick and sheâs at this hospice?â
âYeah,â you say.
âI was just visiting her mom with her,â she tells you.
âAw,â you comment, âI see, I see.â
You adore Hana, you really do. She was there for you when the whole Yuna and Choso thing went down, picking your shifts up for a good week when you couldnât stomach going into work when your ex-best friendâs stupid face was gloating in the halls over how she stole your boyfriend. Hana was there for you when you were a new hire and all the doctors were being bitchy about a ânewbie in the EDâ, but she stood up for you, even cussed the fuck out of one of attendings for the whole hall to hear when you were being disrespected by one of them. Sheâs someone you can beam about how hot the EMT and Firefighter men that stroll into the ED are, too. A priceless companion.
And even though you two have hung out after hours sometimes, it was still always a little awkward to see a coworker outside of work.
âWhat are you doing here?â she asks.
âI actually, um, was going to tell you at our shift tomorrow, but I just admitted my mom to the hospice too,â you say, âandâŚthanks a lot for telling me about it. I really appreciate it. It seems like a wonderful facility.â
Her eyes briefly widen with surprise before they soften once again. âOh, thatâs wonderful, love. I hope all goes well. And your little insurance scam worked! Good for you!â
âShhh,â you hiss at her, looking around yourself with paranoia, âthe feds are everywhere.â
She laughs, sweet in the air, before the sound settles and she looks at you with something reminiscent of well-intentioned concern. Her eyes flit to the plastic bag you were still holding behind your legs. âHeyâŚum, ifâŚif you ever want some company when you come to visit your mom, just let me know. I hope you know you donât have to do everything alone.â
You blink at her, sucking in a short breath to respond, but it only leaves you as a slight puff of air. Thereâs a silent gratitude that you give her, because itâs hard for you to express any feelings with words, but youâve found that the people in your life who know you best can always read you without them.Â
âThank you, Hana,â you manage to say with a slight croak to your voice because you were fighting back tears.
She smiles at you. âTake care, okay? And see ya tomorroooowwwwww,â she coos at you, coming up to you to give you a small hug, a squeeze of your upper arm, and then she heads back towards the direction of the hospice.
You watch her walk away until you canât see her anymore. And then you head towards your car.
When you arrive at your neighborhood, you park in front of Gojoâs house. You have a feeling that you wonât be able to bear the vast emptiness of your home now that your mother is elsewhere, and so you drag your feet up the stone stairs of his house with a heavy heart instead.
The spare key that he gave you weakly pushes into the keyhole with about as much force as your fingers can manage, and you realize they almost feel atrophied.Â
The house is dark when you step inside, spare for the ambient street lights shining through cracked open blinds on the windows, and the curtains rustle gently from the draft of the AC, a chill that reaches you too by the time you make it to the staircase.
It doesnât seem like Gojoâs home. A glance at the clock tells you itâs close to 8pm. You briefly consider texting him to ask where heâs at, why heâs out so late, when heâll be home, and whatâs for dinner, but you canât even bring yourself to pull your phone out of your coat pocket.
Weak legs manage to take you upstairs and youâre about to pass through to your room when the slightly open door to the master bedroom taunts you, like a peephole into some other wordly dimension. Like the wardrobe in the chronicles of Narnia. A portal into your fake husbandâs life.
With a palm pushing on the door, you slowly crack it open, and you know the anxious voices in your head are getting worse by the day when the creaking of the door hinges sounds like a lullaby to you.Â
Was this an invasion of privacy? And did you really care if it was?
The room is big, with a king sized bed off to the left, sheets neatly made and duvet primly tucked under, like the way hotel beds are set up. You feel a slight flush of embarrassment when you remember you havenât been making your bed in the mornings for the past couple days youâve been living here so far, and you wonder if Gojo would judge you for something like that. If heâd think you were a messy or undisciplined person. If he would think less of you.
Truthfully, in a lot of ways, you still felt like a child. You barely weathered a lot of your formative adolescent years when dealing with your parentsâ divorce, and youâve had to put so much of your life on pause to take care of your mom ever since she got diagnosed. So here you were, in the body of a 29-year-old woman, yet still feeling so painfully juvenile. One that forgets to make her bed in the mornings, and on most nights canât seem to stomach anything other than cereal for dinner. It was like you were still at a party that everyone else had left, except all it ever was is hell. Your life was such a stark contrast to the lives of other adults youâve come across. The ones that wake up at six to go on runs, the ones that have paid off mortgages with five figures in their retirement accounts, oh god, the ones that meal prep, and the ones that, all things considered, have their lives together. The ones that donât spend at least an hour of every day, in fetal position on their bed, sobbing until tears soak through the sheets of the pillow down to the feathers like bone, because youâre so overwhelmed with stress and preparing yourself for the grief of losing your mother which you know that, no matter how hard you try to save her from, will inevitably one day come.Â
You used to cook dinner every night, make your bed every morning, and go to pilates on the weekends. Back when you were a little younger and healed and excited to live life. But now, you barely get by. Your priorities are with your mother. You canât remember the last time you did anything nice for yourself, including something as simple as the luxury of getting to come home to a clean house because you hardly ever had time to clean it, not with all the doctorâs appointments you were driving your mother to, not with all the extra shifts you were picking up at the hospital to pay off your debt, not with all the times you felt too depressed to even get out of bed.Â
But your mother is in hospice now, so youâve made time, right? Youâve made the decision that everyone in your life has been begging you to finally do. So why do you still feel so empty inside?
By a quick survey of the room, you notice Gojo doesnât really have many framed photos hung up on the walls or perched up on surfaces. None, actually. Only a contemporary painting above his bed frame and then a faded vintage horror movie poster plastered up near his desk. Not terribly odd, since in your experience most men donât really do the whole âcluttering the house with millions of photos of their familyâ thing until they at least have a couple of kids and some purebred dog. The thought of Gojo someday setting up a little portrait photo at his desk with his wifeâsâhis eventual real forever wifeâs, pretty face in it, posing with their two beautiful kids, makes an oddly melancholic feeling waft through you. You wonder if he would keep a two-by-two in his wallet, too.
Your feet move one in front of the other as your finger traces the surface wood of a dresser cabinet, something that looks a little vintage and oaky, in stark contrast to the modern minimalist vibe Gojo has set up in the rest of the room. A family heirloom, maybe? Thereâs no dust that coats your finger, which surprises you. If you were to run your finger across your dresser at home youâd have collected enough dust to snort down your windpipes like a recreational drug. But Gojoâs a real estate agent, making a living off of dressing houses up in perfect cosplay so that monetarily stable middle class families feel inclined to buy them. So youâre not exactly surprised heâs invested in keeping his own house in pristine condition too.Â
There is a little bit of chaos, though. Like the shirt he has haphazardly hung over his chair at his office space over to the right. Thereâs a coffee mug sitting there too, porcelain and reflecting the moon light off, but upon peering inside you see that itâs half empty with stale coffee. Heâs got pens sprawled across the desk, in a fashion that suggests he accidentally knocked them over in a rush, and slowly, like some grounding exercise, you place them one by one back into the paper mache pencil holder. It briefly occurs to you that he has a lot of paper mache containers of sorts around the house. You lift up the pencil cup, turning it in your hand until your eyes catch something written on it with glittery pink gel pen.
i luv u unkle toru! -yur BEST FREND 4EVUR juno!!! :D
A small smile makes it onto your face. The handwriting was messy, more like scratches than smooth lines, and nothing less than what you would expect of a child. You remember making paper mache and clay trinkets at preschool for your mom and dad when you were younger. And youâre sure if you were brave enough to open the box of memorabilia that sits in your attic some day, youâd see your own scratchy scribbled handwriting on them. An innocence that is long gone and buried, never again to be delicately placed on desks or counters for all the living.
The draft from the AC reaches you once again, brushing over your skin and causing a chill to shiver down your spine. It kicks at the curtains as well, causing them to ruffle up towards you, baring the dark outside world into the streets. And you notice in that momentary glance that thereâs a roof just outside the window that overlooks the backyard. A roof? Spotted by a depressed woman going through a quarter life crisis? There was nothing more tempting than that.Â
The window was easy to open, which only caused unease over the revelation of how easy it would be for someone to rob this house. You make a mental note to tell Gojo to get a ring camera or security system of some sort since he doesnât seem to have one, but you can already picture him telling you something about how statistically low the crime rates are in this neighborhood compared to all the other neighborhoods, and then youâd tell him that itâs just for your peace of mind. But whether heâd compromise or not after that, youâre really not sure.
You take a seat on the roof, a little scared as you sit because of the slight slope, but itâs comfortable once youâre settled. You sit criss-cross-apple-sauce, staring out into the neighborhood of perfectly lined up suburban houses. Youâve got a better view into some neighbors' backyards, noticing that a couple of them had pools while some of them have big gardens. There's a cat resting up on a fence in the distance. A car drives by with headlights illuminating everything in its proximity briefly before zooming off. You glance up at the sky, and notice the full moon, but itâs too cloudy to see any stars. Or perhaps it was just the light pollution from the lamps making it difficult to see.
On instinct, your hand reaches inside your coat pocket for your phone, but your knuckles hit something else instead. A moment of brief confusion flickers through your head, but then you immediately recall the last-minute purchase you made at the gas station.
Your hand pulls out the object, and then you stare down at it. Squinting your eyes a little, because itâs a sight that feels familiar but also one you havenât seen in so long: a pack of twenty Marlboro red cigarettes.Â
Youâve tried a lot of things to manage your stress over the years. Excessively working out, eating a lot of sugar, going on six hour hikes to touch grass, flirting with random men at bars, fucking Choso until he was rendered speechless, multiple types of antidepressants, you almost tried smoking weed once with your roommate in college but you wimped out last second. But the habit that had gotten you through the years of 21 to 24 is held loosely in your hand right now. Itâs been five years since you quit, but resolve was often a fickle thing. As the saying goes, once an addict, always an addict.Â
Thereâs a brief moment of hesitation as you slowly peel the plastic off of the back, but then it all comes back to you like a reflex youâll never forget up to where you slide a cigar up out and then pinch it between your two fingers. Forgetting to buy a lighter with the cigarettes is definitely something you would do, but because you remembered it was something that you would do, you remembered not to do it. The flick of the flame coming to life is ASMR you didnât know you were painfully nostalgic for, and you balance the cigarette between your lips in that sort of movie-star way people used to obsess over back in the day. But just as you bring the lighter up to the end of the cigarette, and just before you can light itâ
A hand shoots out in your periphery, grabbing your wrist and entirely stalling the movement.
You gasp, lips parting enough for the cigarette to fall from them and into your lap. The hand wrapped around your wrist is large and masculine, and you briefly consider screaming, but when you snap your neck to look at the perpetrator, you see Gojo crouched down next to you on this roof. You notice heâs wearing a black suit, a tie that was loosely secure hanging from his neck into the space between his spread thighs as heâs crouched, and whatever gel he had in his hair from earlier only barely remains as strands fall over his forehead haphazardly. He looks like heâs on the other end of a long work day.Â
You blink at him, expression plastered with surprise, but his is only earnest. With breathtaking blue eyes that you realize he could easily use to surrender a person just by looking at them, like the way heâs looking at you right now. His lips are pressed together into a firm line, as if to suppress some emotion, but the slight crease to his brow makes you feel like youâre in trouble somehow. Like he was silently scolding you for something.
âIââ you stutter.
He lets go of your wrist and discreetly pulls the lighter out of your hand. And then his hand reaches for the pack of cigarettes you were balancing on your knee, but on some reflex that you donât even think about, you try to snatch them away from him, and now youâre both tugging at the same pack of cigarettes.
ây/n,â he says, âlet go.â
âNo,â you say stubbornly.
He sighs and tugs a little harder. âGive them to me.â
âButââ you stammer, voice becoming softer to see if thatâd work on him, âIâmâŚâ Your grip on them tightens. âIâm stressed.â
He raises an eyebrow at you, then finally loses his patience and snatches them right out of your hand. He stands up from his crouched down position to toss the pack off to the side onto the roof somewhere. Youâre surprised when he lets out a sigh and sits down next to you on the roof, as if he felt the obligation to. His legs stretch out in front of him, but still bent slightly at the knees, and he leans backwards with his body weight braced on his palms laid flat on wood paneling behind him. âThere are better ways to relieve stress,â he tells you candidly.Â
âLike what?â you ask, and just when he opens his mouth to speak, you clarify, âand donât say sex.â
He shuts his mouth and his eyes flit up to the sky for a brief second. âDamn. I didnât have a back-up answer.âÂ
You roll your eyes, releasing a deep breath, then draw your knees to your chest before resting your chin on top of them.Â
âI didnât know you smoke,â he says after a century-long minute.Â
You wince a little, because you were half hoping he was going to just drop the subject all together.Â
You bite your lip nervously and hug your knees to your chest tighter as if to hide yourself from him. âI donât. Well, I havenât. Um, not for a while.â
âHuh. I see,â he says.
Another silence passes, and as he shuffles next to you, the fabric of his suit brushes against the fabric of your coat, and youâve become entirely too aware of the feeling.
âSo,â he says, breaking the awkward silence, âyour momâs in hospice now?â
You nod, enthusiastic enough to where you wonât look like youâre entirely depressed about it.
âThatâs good,â he says, âno issues with the insurance?â
You shake your head. âThey need you to sign some papers by the end of the week though,â you tell him. âWeâll have to go in person.â
He nods slowly to affirm heâll make time for it. âI really hope things get better for your mom,â he says, voice soft as he stares off into neighbors homes like you had been doing ten minutes ago. You see the cat that was resting on the fence get up, do a big stretch, and start walking along the length of the fence. Your eyes briefly glance at Gojo, and you notice his gaze is tracing the catâs path.Â
âMyââ you start, hesitant all of a sudden by the vulnerability you already feel swelling within you, most definitely due to sitting with someone on a rooftop late at night, but you decide that youâll be nice to him for once, ââŚmy mom seems to remember you a lot. More than she remembers me.â You let out a small humoring laugh, as if that fact doesnât completely destroy you. âShe was blabbering to me again for the seventh time about how you apparently fixed our AC.â You try to bite your tongue, but canât help it when you say, âalthough Iâm pretty sure you just pressed a bunch of buttons until it started working again.â
âYup. Thatâs exactly what I did.â
You roll your eyes and sigh.
Another awkward silence.
âCan I ask you a question?â you say.
âSure.â His voice sounds deeper, like heâs sleepy.Â
âWhy did you agree to marry me? Thatâs not something people just do out of nowhere.â
He glances over at you, and you flicker your eyes to him. âWhy? Having regrets?â he teases, with a slight nudge of his elbow to your side.Â
âJust answer me.â
He lifts his palms up from behind him and leans forward, placing his hands on his knees instead. âI donât know. If something I could do would help someone out that much, I wasnât going to say no.â
You hum quietly, still confused by his intentions. But youâre too jaded to question them.
âIt costs nothing to be nice,â he adds.Â
You run soothing circles over your thigh through the fabric of your jeans. For some reason, your mind wanders to Choso. Thinking of all the years you wasted staying with him even though you knew his affections were long gone, just because you didnât want to break his heart. Only to realize that you never had that privilege in the first place.Â
âI think,â you say, your voice barely above a whisper as you draw your knees closer to your chest, âthat sometimes it does.â
A gust of autumn wind breezes by, ruffling the trees that the two of you are at eye-level with at the moment. You're pretty sure youâve completely lost Gojoâs interest at this point, where heâs finally too tired to deal with your oddly cryptic attitudes and overall generally displeasing vibe, assuming this based solely on his prolonged silence beside you. Youâre ready for him to get up and abandon you here on this roof, left to ponder every single thing youâve done wrong in your life. It was any second now.
âSometimes,â he instead speaks up, and itâs so surprising to you that you jolt a little bit, âyou can do everything right, and people will still find a way to fuck you over. But I donât think thatâs any reason to stop being nice to others.â
You glance over at him, your eyes widening slightly, but he just continues to peer off straight into the night. His blinks are slow, lingering on being closed for a moment before he opens them again, and youâre mesmerized by the sight. The skin under his eyes is slightly dark from exhaustion, heavy with character that makes you aware that heâs just a person too. And for what feels like the tenth time this week, you realize that heâsââŚhandsome. And for what feels like the tenth time this week, your heart flutters in your chest.
He scoffs suddenly and dusts his hands off. âI sound like a fucking youth pastor.â He lets out an exhale before suddenly standing up onto his feet before you can think more on it. He looks off into the night again and lets out another exhale that sounds more like a sigh this time. âGod, itâs getting a lot colder these days. Might have to start running the heater.â
You blink up at him with no commentary to add.Â
He looks down at you. His face is relaxed, but you can tell those eyes are distracted. A shimmering blue ocean in its own world while he attempts to stay present in this one.Â
He holds his hand out to you, and you stare at it blankly like youâve got no clue what he intends for you to do with it. But you finally take the hint and curl your hand around his palm so that he can pull you up onto your feet too.
You stumble a little, falling forward from the sudden blood flow to your brain, but he holds you steady by the strong grip of his hands on your elbows. Heâs close to you, close enough to where you can smell the faint lingering scent of his cologne. Something different than that expensive one he wore to the courthouse, but itâs comforting somehow. A fragrance thatâs more him. And you feel nervous as you look up at him underneath pale moonlight.Â
He lets go of your elbows. You feel cold from the loss of his touch. But his right hand moves to gently hold your left hand in his palm, holding it curled as his thumb barely grazes the stone you wear on your ring finger; the one he gave you.
The way his thumb prods at the silver band is like heâs inspecting its quality, as if it has to pass some test to be worthy of sitting on your finger. Or maybe just any finger, if you were to quell the delusion. Youâre not sure if heâs satisfied with his inspection.
âWhere did you get itââ you blurt out.
His gaze flickers up to your face briefly before heâs back to examining the ring. âIt was my momâs.â
Your mouth gapes slightly in shock, heart dropping a little in your chest, and all of a sudden you feel guilty. Guilty that he put his motherâs ring on your finger for something that was fake, something that was essentially a business deal, something exchanged to you out of fraud when it was a precious family heirloom that should be exchanged with love. And maybe he didnât care about it much, some people donât care about the sentiments of objects. But your mind thinks of the oaky vintage dresser in his room, so out of place in the aesthetic of its surroundings, a decision you can only imagine him of all people, mr. âeverything in this house has to look like an IKEA catalogâ, would do if the dresser held some importance to him that was more than meets the eye. And so youâre compelled to think that maybe this ring did, too.Â
âWhy would you give me this?! You couldâve just gotten a cheap fake diamond ring from a pawn shop and called it a day,â you ask him, suddenly feeling burdened by it.
âWell I wasnât exactly given much time to think of other options.â
âButââ you start, only to realize you have no counter arguments for that.
He lets out a huh noise, like the sound someone makes when theyâre pleasantly surprised by something, as he looks down at your hand that he still held in his. âItâs kinda crazy that it fits you perfectly. I wasnât sure.â
Your mind wanders to when he slipped the ring onto your finger in the courtroom, followed by the kiss. Soft, sweet, the lingering warm sensation of his palm on your cheek as he cupped your face, the same way those heartthrob actors do in all those romance movies and kdramas that you watch on Friday nights while snuggled up in a blanket, wondering when anyone will ever kiss you like that. You remember the ghost sensation of his hand hovering over the small of your back, fingers lightly grazing the nape of your neck, his frame blocking out everything around you as he kissed you, just to pull away and for the two of you to then pretend like it never happened, as if it wasnât one of the sweetest kisses youâve ever known.
You slowly pull your hand out of his, the moment feeling too tender for your liking, and you clear your throat before flitting your eyes up to his.Â
âRule #1,â you remind him with a soft whisper, âno touching.â
You purse your lips, watching his round eyes blink once, then twice, before he shoves his hands in his suit pockets. He rocks back and forth on his heels for a few seconds, nodding slowly in submission, and then he turns on them to head back to the house. Youâre standing a little stunned from the abrupt ending to this trance of a moment on the roof, and youâre also a little surprised with how your chest is heaving a little bit with fast breaths, but you eventually snap out of it to follow him inside too.Â
You two make it back inside the house, with little words exchanged. You pretend to not notice the way Gojo tilts his head at his desk, like heâs confused about why it looks tidier than when he left it. Youâre prepared to feign innocence or ignorance, but he doesnât press you about it.Â
âYâknow,â he says from behind you, his chest briefly brushing against the back of your head as he pushes the bedroom door in front of you open so that you can head out into the loft, âthose oversized 1800s-esque nightgowns youâve been wearing around the house kinda make you look like a less-hot version of Ebenezer Scrooge.â
âGo fuck yourself.â
â˘ââââ˘â˘âŚâ˝âŚâ˘â˘ââââ˘
âSign right here for me, sir.â
You watch as the nurse slides the papers across the high-raised counter of the hospice nursing desk towards Gojo, his eyebrows narrowing as his eyes skim the words on the paper and land at the highlighted lines where heâs been intended to sign. You feel nervous for some reason, as if heâd suddenly find something disagreeable and refuse to sign, then take you to the courthouse first thing to finalize a divorce and send you off to prison while claiming he was blackmailed into the whole marriage in the first place.
Instead, he pulls a pen from the chest pocket of his suit jacket, clicking the end of it and scribbling his signature onto the paper with some jet black ink that looks like it takes a second to dry. How pretentious of him. The pink pom-pom pen was right there.
The nurse behind the counter continues to chat with him about something, blah blah dependents, blah blah tax claims, blah blah youâll receive an itemized bill in the mail. Youâre trying your best to eavesdrop in on the conversation, but most of your senses are being occupied by examining all your surroundings. When you dropped your mother off at the hospice, your feelings were at the forefront of conscience, but now that youâve had a couple days to come down from that overwhelming emotional high, youâre here to scope out the quality of this place youâve just dumped your mom at.
The facility is clean and sleek, with a color theme of red and an ocean blue across the signs, the furniture, even with the paperwork they hand out. All the workers had color-coded scrubs based on their occupation or specialty, and none of them had stains on the fabric. You take a glance down at the modest leather pumps you were wearing past the creases of the long skirt, and notice that the floor was shimmering off their reflection in a perfect polish. It wasnât bad, this place.
âThanks, you too,â you hear Gojo say to the nurse behind the counter. He has a professional smile on his face, but still kind and genuine, which makes the woman at the computer something bashful and unable to make eye contact. He folds something that looks like a receipt into his chest pocket before tucking his pen back in there too and then turns to face you. You make a mental note to pay him back for whatever he just paid for, at least once you move some money around.Â
Your eyebrows lift, feeling a little dazed as you blink at him blankly.
âAlright,â he says, shoving his hands in his pockets, the sound of his shoes on the polished hospital floors satisfactorily tapping in your ears as he took a couple steps towards you, âwhereâs your momâs room?â
âHuh?â
âWhatâs her room number?â he asks you.
âY-You wanna go see her??â
âOf course I want to,â he says, âsheâs my mother-in-law.â
You roll your eyes and pet the fabric of your skirt to smooth the wrinkles out. âYouâre getting a little too invested in this role of fake husband.â
âI get to annoy you all day and ride the adrenaline rush of committing a federal crime,â he says, âof fucking course Iâd get invested.â
You sigh, tossing some of your hair to behind your shoulder before glancing up at the signs, squinting slightly to locate the ward where your motherâs room is, before you hear an extremely high-pitched and somewhat catty feminine voice call out from behind you. You glance at Gojoâs face as he peers off to whoeverâs behind you, and you see him visibly stiffen a little.
âIs that Dayton countyâs sexiest realtooorrr???â the voice purrs, and you turn on your heel to see a blonde bombshell of a woman clacking her kitten heels down the glistening floors of the hospice, with another brunette bombshell just a few paces behind her. Bombshell #2 sighs something like âit issssâ before they walk right up to your fake husband and take turns at giving him a playful squeeze of his bicep. You have to physically stop your jaw from dropping at the sight.Â
âWow! Ladies, soâ...so great to see you two,â he says out of polite obligation, and you immediately clock the fact that he doesnât address them by name.
Bombshell #1 turns to look at you, all of her hair moving as one solid entity with the motion from all the hair spray thatâs probably holding it up, and she points at you with a long slender finger that narrows into a french-tip. âOh whoâs this?? Another one of your clients??â
âOh, no, sheâs myââ
âIâm his wife,â you interrupt him, irritated for some reason.Â
Both the women chirp something out like oh! before their faces twist with confusion.Â
âI didnât know you were married,â Bombshell #2 says in a thick New Jersey accent.
Gojo lifts his left hand up, the silver band on his hand glimmering under fluorescent hospice lighting. âVery happily,â he says, as if someone was holding a gun to his head.
Bombshell #1 crosses her arms, and you try not to stare at how nice her boobs look in the low scoop-neck jaguar print top she was wearing. You were no better than a man. And now youâre pissed off at the idea of Gojo glancing down too, but a flick of your gaze up to his face tells you heâs safe. For now.Â
âYou werenât married when I asked you if you were a month ago,â Bombshell #1 sneers at him. Itâs true, the math wouldnât make sense, but in his defense, this marriage was a fraud.
âOr when you took me out for dinner last week after I bought my house,â Bombshell #2 snarls with an undertone of hurt.Â
Gojo clears his throat beside you before pointing at Bombshell #2. âHow is that, by the way?â he asks in an attempt to change the subject, âthe half acre down on Maple Ave, right? You, uh, enjoying the pool?â
The woman let out an offended scoff andâwere her eyes sheening with tears?? She puts her hands on her hips. âNo. Mine is the three bedroom house with the cedar gazebo on 14th street.â
Her friend next to her rolls her eyes and smacks her gum between her cheek. âIâm the one that bought the half acre down on Maple Ave, jerk. Ugh!â She grabs her friendâs arm with a high-pitched hmph noise leaving her throat, and you can hear the other one sniffling subtly as she wobbles on her heels with her friendâs pull of her arm.Â
Right before leaving the two of you alone, Bombshell #1 turns to you and says, âI hope you find someone who treats you better,â and then they storm off together down the hallway, their perfectly blow-dried hair bouncing in sync with each stomp.
You blink at the sight, a little flabbergasted from the interaction, and then flit your faze up to Gojo. You see him awkwardly scratching at the back of his head with a grimace on his stupidly handsome face.Â
âThatâs what you get for being a manwhore,â you tell him.
âIâm not a manwhorââ
âYou went on a date with another woman while you were maaaaarrrieeeddd?!â you coo as you let out a fake gasp and slap your cheeks with your hands, âdespicable, really.â
He lets out some disgruntled noise, the source coming from deep within his throat. âNo. We werenât fake-married yet,â he vindicates himself, âand it wasnât a date. I just bought her dinner as a congrats for buying a house. Not a big deal. I do it for all my clients.â
âSatoru. You do realize youâre leading these women on, right? I mean, Iâve seen the way you talk to them. Even if you think youâre just being friendly, please know that your definition of friendly is most peopleâs definition of flirting.â
âThatâs ridiculous.â
âItâs true.â
He raises an eyebrow as he glances down at you. âAlright, how come this flirting in disguise of friendliness hasnât worked on you then?â
You scoff in disbelief before crossing your arms. Maybe you did deserve a better fake husband. âYouâre never friendly with me. Youâre always rude to me.â
âWhat? Iâm not always rude to you.â
âWell, youâre certainly much more rude to me than you are to other women,â you say, tapping the tip of your shoe with irritation.
âCan we not do this right now? Weâre in the middle of a hospice.âÂ
âGod, youâre such a cop-out,â you mumble as you forcefully push past him towards the hallway thatâll lead you to your mother. You can hear that Gojoâs on your tail, following you down one of the more dimly lit hallways, and you can tell he needs to stall the strides of his Daddy Longlegs to not overtake your pace.
âWhat the fuck is a cop-out?â he asks you from behind.
âLook it up on urban dictionary, Grandpa. Unless you donât know what the Internet is, either,â you spat.Â
You waltz right up to your motherâs room just in time to see a nurse making her way out with a clipboard in her hands. She glances over to you when she sees you approaching in her periphery.
âHi! How can I help you?â she asks.
âIs it alright if we visit my mother?â you ask her.
âOh! Sure, let me just clean her bed pan really quick.â
Your brow furrows. âB-Bedpan?? Why is she using a bedpan??â
The nurse stops in her movements. âWell, yesterday and today, thatâs just what she has decided to use.â
You immediately become hostile. âThatâs not right. She never needed to use one at home. Why is she suddenly using one here? Is that not a clear sign of deterioration? The restrooms must not be kept well enough here if she doesnât want to use them.â
The nurse becomes something meek, her eyes widening as her mouth gapes slightly. âMaâam,â she squeaks out, âwe see this commonly with patients as they begin to adjust to hospice life. Weâll urge her to use the restroom, but as of right now, we need to prioritize what she finds most comfortable.â
Your expression softens, your shoulders relaxing from their tense position, and you duck your head a little with guilt. âRightâŚIâm sorry.â
The nurse presses her lips together with a well-meaning smile before shuffling into the room and closing the door behind her. You sigh and lean your back against the wall next to the number plate, cheeks flushing slightly from the confrontation. You have no idea how loud your voice was or who heard you. But you try to convince yourself that youâre just stressed and trying to look out for your mother, although the guilt still sits.
You glance up to see Gojo staring at you with slightly wide eyes, his hands shoved into his pockets, and he tilts his head to study your expression.
âWhat?â you snap at him.
âAre you doing okay?â
âJust fine, thanks.â
âAre you sure?â
âSatoru,â you cut his questioning off by raising a palm into the air, âjustââŚjust stop.â
His brow furrows together slightly, but before he can show any further concern, the nurse exits the room and holds the door open for the two of you.Â
âAll set!â she chirps, and Gojo moves to hold the door open in her stead, and then the nurse bolts down to disappear somewhere down the hallway.
You hear Gojo let out a small huff of a scoff as he stares down in the direction the nurse ran off in. âGlad to know Iâm not the only one thatâs scared of you.â
You roll your eyes and walk into the room through the open door.
Your mother lays in her bed, looking out the window with her hands resting on top of layers of white linen sheets, her skin looking slightly paler than usual. You approach her bedside slowly and she finally turns her head to look at you.
âHi mom,â you gently greet her, sitting down on the stool beside her bed, âhow are you doing?â
Her eyes dart across the features of your face, and you briefly glance towards the wall to the right where you see Gojo standing from a slight distance.
âOh, hi dear,â she says with a smile, and relief washes over you.
You match her smile with your own. âMom, I brought someone here to see you.â You glance over at Gojo, who starts to close distance now as he approaches the foot of the bed, âthis is Satoru, my husband.â
Your motherâs eyes widen, âOh! I know him,â she scoldingly swats a hand at you, like youâve embarrassed her somehow by assuming that she doesnât know who he is, âheâs my neighbor!â
You sigh, âyes mom, the one that fixed the A/C?â You attempt to finish her sentence for her.
She looks confused for a moment, but slightly nods as if to avoid any further confusion for herself. âButââŚbut, whyâŚâ she trails off and then looks at you, âIâm sorry, are you my nurse?â
Your shoulders drop slightly. âNo, mom, itâs me. Your daughter. Do you remember?â
Her face scrunches before it entirely relaxes to keep some image of composure despite the haze you know she feels in her head. âOhâŚyes, yesâŚmy little girl. I remember you, of course!â
Your eyes become layered with a slight sheen of tears, âIâm glad.â
âWhereâs your father?â she asks, âhe said heâd bring me someâŚoh dear, whatââŚhe said heâd bring me tea. Iâve been waiting.â
âMom, dad isââ you pause for a moment to think on your feet. You could either tell the truth, or a little white lie. You never know what to do. And either one comes with either guilt or sorrow. âWell, heâll be here soon, I just wanted to come see you.â
âOh okayâŚâ she trails off, her eyes squinting at you once more with that same look of confusion on it, but then they drift towards Gojo. âOh youâre a very handsome young man! You look just like my neighbor.â
Your eyes flicker up to Gojo, and he walks up to your side by your momâs bed. âYes, Mrs. l/n, I am your neighbor.â
âWith the lemon tree!â
âThe avocado tree,â you correct her with a small sigh. âAnd heâs my husband mom. And also our neighbor.â
âOh I see I seeâŚâ she says, looking up at him, and in a moment that shocks you, she holds her hand up for him to take.
Thereâs a slight moment of surprise on his face too, but he accepts her frail hand in his, and you glance over to your mom to see her look at him with some look of peace on her face.
âOh, sit down here, wonât you?â she tells him, and you both blink at her in a moment of hesitation.
He pulls a stool up to the side of the bed right next to you and takes a seat down onto it. Your mother holds his hand with both of hers now, soothing her palm over the back of it before she taps on it lightly.
âOh, my little girl is very sweet. She would bring me flowers from the garden when she was,â she glances at you, confused once more, âwell I remember her when she was so little but she looksâŚa little older now. Ah, but she would bring me such pretty flowers.â
Your heart aches in your chest. You never knew what version of you your mother would remember. Some days, youâre still supposed to be an angsty teenager that shuts doors in her face, some days you were just as you are right now, and other days, you were just her little girl. And it confused her, the image of not seeing you in the way that she remembers. In the only way she knew how.
âYouâll take good care of my sweet girl, wonât you?â she asks him.
And it knocks the wind out of you.
It drops your heart to the center of the earth.
The thought that, after so many moments where she doesnât remember you, she still knows that youâre someone she wants to keep safe.
Your mouth gapes slightly, tears welling in your eyes and you try your best to blink them away, but you see Gojoâs hand slip out from being held by your motherâs hands, to instead use both of his to hold hers. Your eyes snap to his face, and you see that same earnest expression youâve been growing used to seeing these days.Â
âYes,â he responds, eye contact level with hers, âI will.â
A small puff of air leaves your lips, a single tear streaming down your cheek and you quickly swipe your trembling fingers to remove any evidence of it before you huff out a shaky, âexcuse me.â And then youâre standing up off the stool, and in a few hurried steps across the room as more tears continue to stream down your face, you make it to the door to push out into the suffocating air of the hallway.
Itâs hard to breathe, huffs and puffs barely leaving your lips as you struggle to pull air into your lungs while you storm down the hallway at a fast pace, your heels clicking underneath you in a way that only sets you off further. Suddenly, all the sounds around you make you sick to your stomach, a wave of nausea washing over you, and your nose burns with the intensity of the tears that continue to stream down your face. A few hospice staff look at you with concerned expressions, and you eventually reach a heavy-duty door that leads you out into a secluded staircase hallway where the dim lighting serves to relax at least some of your senses, but you still feel like youâre about to pass out.
Even in the haze of your emotions, thereâs this glimmer of a memory that comes to mind. One from when you were younger and you were pushed on the playground at school. You cried and cried and cried in your motherâs arms, but even then, you didnât want her to baby you. You would say to her, Iâm a big girl now! in that same way a child knows nothing of what it truly means to brave the world.Â
That little girl had no idea that one day, there would be moments where she wouldnât be remembered as her motherâs little girl anymore.Â
No matter how old you grow, you will always be my little girl, your motherâs voice echoes to you, the feeling of her squeezing you in her arms as she holds your sobbing little form in hers casting a ghost sensation across your skin.
In a motherâs eyes, youâll always be her baby.
And thatâs why it hurts.
Because itâs all fake.
Itâs phony.
Itâs not real.
This arrangement you have with Gojo.
And if your mother were to die tomorrow, there would be no one to take care of her little girl anymore.
Not in the way she believes there will be.
Of all the white lies, this one pierces you straight through your heart in a way that leaves you gasping for air.
Amidst your whirlwind of thoughts, you hear the door push open harshly, and when you glance over, you see Gojo standing in this dimly lit hallway as he turns his head quickly to the left and sees you standing there.
âHey,â he says, catching his breath as he lightly jogs up to you, âhey, hey, hey,â he repeats with more concern now when he sees the state youâre in, and he seamlessly pulls you into a hug, your cheek pressing against his chest that feels warm even through the fabric of his suit jacket and shirt, and that familiar scent of him completely engulfs you.
You sob quietly, wiping your snot on his tie and your tears on the felt fabric beside it, your hands balled into tiny fists at your chest, squeezed between the two of you. You feel him tuck your head under his chin and his arms wrap around you tighter. You donât even realize it at first, but suddenly, it has become easier to breathe.
Then, you wail, and you cry, and you sob, because you donât have the words to even explain how you feel, about not just this, but with everything, a buildup of everything that has been suffocating you in your life that just comes crashing down on you all at once.
âI know,â he says, his palm resting on the back of your head as he holds your face to his chest, his voice soothing in your ears while you sob until thereâs nothing left to cry. âI know.â
You two stay like this for another minute or so as you come down from the cries, your remnant sniffling echoing in the hallway while you wipe more of your snot on his jacket. You make the first move to pull your face away from his chest, but he still keeps his arms wrapped around you when you look up at him.
With your gaze darting across his face, you take in the blue in his eyes. Eyes that are looking at you so softly itâs suddenly hard to breathe once more. And when those eyes flit to your lips, your mouth parts slightly as you two breathe in unison.
Itâs possible that you could have dreamed the moment you saw him lean down slightly towards you, his eyes still set on your lips, but it didnât matter because youâre pushing him away with strong fists before you can even register the thought in your head.
He lets go of you entirely, his eyes wide once more, and you glance down at your feet.Â
A tender moment, just like on the roof, broken just because you canât handle thatââŚthat way, that intense way that he looks at you. New rule, no looking at me longingly like you want to kiss me. I wonât allow it.
âI want to go home,â you whisper, still examining your shoes. And you suddenly feel embarrassed that he had to see you this way. Heâs supposed to be scared and intimidated by you, not holding you in his arms while you cry.Â
Heâs silent for a moment, but you can tell heâs searching for things to say. âYou donât want to say bye to your mom before we go?â
You swipe your palm against the wetness on your cheek. âNo. I just want to go home.â
ây/n,â he tried to convince you.
You finally look up at him. âPlease.â
He breathes in a few breaths as he studies the features of your face in a way that makes you feel so seen that itâs frightening. But he slowly nods, then says,
âOkay.â
.
.
.
.
.
[end of chapter 4]
a/n. hi friendsss i hope you enjoyed :'') yea like i said at the a/n in the beginning, this chapter is a slight off-tangent from last chapter, but ch5 will continue with a lot of the stuffs that were brought up in ch3. but yea i wanted to explore the whole process of emotions reader would go through putting her mom in hospice, since it kinda felt like a big thing, hence why it got its own chapter. aaa i hope to see you in the next one!! much love from me :''0
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note: iâm starting to transition towards tagging interacts to make sure iâm tagging active readers! but as always let me know if/when your taglist preferences change :)
taglist is closed
#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo smut#gojo x reader smut#gojo x reader fluff#gojo x reader angst#jjk gojo#gojo satoru smut#gojo satoru angst#gojo satoru fluff#smut#fluff#angst#gojo satoru fanfiction#gojo x you#long fic#jjk fanfiction#jjk series#romance#fake dating#fake marriage#neighbors au#ongoing series#humor#slow burn#mutual pining#enemies to lovers#gojo x reader series
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You can rely on Roy Cleeves, a top-rated real estate agent in Kitchener Ontario, for all of your property needs. With his advice, you can stay on top of the curve and learn about the most recent trends in the real estate industry. Roy offers unmatched services that are tailored to your unique needs thanks to his extensive expertise and years of experience. He can help you with anything from purchasing or selling a home to getting the best bargain. You may be sure that working with Roy Cleeves as your trusted agent will be easy and hassle-free.
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Yandere! Yakuza x Reader
I've been plagued by this idea for a while, so let me know what you think! This is just the character introduction. Your new landlord is a Yakuza boss, and his scary looking underling has been tasked to deal with your tenant needs! Although he didn't expect you to be this cute. And you didn't expect him to be this unhinged.
Content: female reader, violence, mentions of stalking
[Part 2] | [Yakuza Masterlist]
This was the last straw.
You're angrily stuffing your suitcase with necessities before the moving company arrives. Each glimpse around the cramped apartment fills you with outrage, as you're still heavily shaken from the events of last night.Â
You first begun to suspect you might have a stalker when you found your outer lock with a fresh dent in it. You then picked a small scrap from the ground nearby and assumed it was leftover damage, but upon further inspection you discovered, disgusted, that it was part of your peephole. Someone must've fiddled with your door a fair amount. You tried to approach your immediate neighbors for help, but they either refused to answer your persistent knocks or downright scurried away when faced with your questions. They didn't want to deal with a foreigner.Â
You tried to put it behind you. The police advised you to be cautions, as there was nothing else they could do without concrete evidence. And thankfully, you had several peaceful weeks following the incident. Last night you were suddenly awakened by faint scratches coming from your balcony. You groggily got up and wondered if your recently added bird feeder was attracting nocturnal visitors. You got up without turning on the light, hoping to catch a glimpse of the mysterious animal. As you pulled the drape, however, you were met with the large frame of a man plucking your laundry in a hurry.Â
A panicked scream erupted from the depths of your chest and you slapped the light switch, erratically searching for your phone. By the time you dialed emergency, the intruder had vanished. You were sobbing against the wall under the fake reassurances of the operator, eyeing the sliding door that had no lock. Had he wished, the masked man could've easily invited himself in. You were at the mercy of a lunatic and no one seemed to be impressed by your situation.Â
No more. Ideally you'd go back to your home country and forget about your plans to build yourself a life in Japan. What were you even thinking? A lonely girl, low on funds, signing a contract to be relocated across the ocean for work. You barely scraped the first months of a mandatory year.Â
You close your suitcase with a satisfying click and on your way out you wipe the table of all the newspaper clippings. You've been scanning the potential offers on the market. The ones within your budget, of course, which means you don't have to worry about being picky. Until you find a new place, your belongings can wait in storage. Dusty furniture is a better prospect than waking up with a pervert looming over you.Â
By the time the clock hits evening hours, you're sipping on your iced coffee with a defeated sigh. Most of the cheap apartments seem to be given to locals. Not outsiders like you. At least they spared you of the false hopes and curtly told you to not expect any call back, so you can swiftly move on to the next circled address. You pull out the crumbled sheet of paper from your pocket. Reading over your list of crossed out lines like this deflates you greatly. At the very bottom lies your final hope: the ad you'd stumbled upon this morning was too good to be true and the realtor was available for viewing at any time, so you're almost certain it's some sort of scam. Yet you can't afford to skip it, can you? You stand up, pat your jeans and take a deep breath in.Â
As you check your phone to confirm the location, you begin to doubt your decision. It's hard to believe no other potential renters have showed up. The apartment is in a convenient area, very close to public transport, at a great price, on what looks like a busy street. Isn't it the dream? So why? You glance around, examining the surroundings. The shops are bustling with people. You try to come up with possible explanations, when a deep voice startles you.
"You must be (Y/N), right? You sure are easy to spot."
You turn around to greet the person. Although the second you spot him, you take an unconscious step back. You'd expected a middle aged man dressed in formal attire with a shy bow and clumsy movements. The one standing before you resembles none of that. He's imposingly tall, with a muscular built and slicked back hair. You can discern the tattoos peeking out from under the rolled up sleeves. His face has multiple deep scars and you can only assume that the pale, discolored eye that's transfixed in one direction is a fake made of glass. One might call him handsome, if you're into the kind of appearance you see in documentaries about the mafia.Â
"Y-you're the landlord?" You stutter, immediately covering your mouth and regretting your lack of tact.Â
"Nuh uh, Boss sent me to deal with it." He flashes you a genuine grin, completely unperturbed by your offhanded implication. "I'm Daitou."
He continues towards the entrance and you follow behind, too awkward to back down now. He describes the living quarters with surprising enthusiasm. If you were to close your eyes and disregard his heavy Kansai accent, you could very well be convinced it's a professional real estate agent hard at work.Â
"Excuse me for asking, but..." Once he finishes his marketing presentation, you cannot help the increasing anxiety. "What's the catch?"
"Huh?"
"For something like this to be so cheap...and no one else being interested...may I be frank and ask what's wrong with it? Please understand, I just left my previous apartment because of a stalker. I don't want to be packing again anytime soon."
"Well, isn't it obvious?" He searches your gaze for a moment, before gasping as if remembering something. "Wait, you're a foreigner, so I guess you don't know. Ah, that explains it."Â
He lets out a hearty laugh, satisfied with his conclusion.Â
"You didn't notice anything strange outside?"
You ponder his question before slowly shaking your head in denial.Â
"Really? A bunch of heavily tattooed guys with family pins on their suits...This is a yakuza quarter. Our Family owns most businesses here. But lately we've had a lot of police on our backs, ya know? Bound to happen when the street is swarming with us. So Boss had this great idea - he's smart like that, ya know, I've never been the bright one - anyways, he suggested we rent some of our housing to regular civilians. Less suspicious that way."Â
He crosses his arms and nods to himself proudly.Â
"I myself think it's a great deal. You won't find anything cheaper for the kind of stuff you're getting. All you have to do is, you know, mind your business. If some weasel questions you, no Sir, you haven't seen or heard anything suspicious. That's all."
You can only stare wide eyed, somewhat taken aback by his honesty.
"Uh...Are you sure you were supposed to tell me all of this? I feel we're skipping some steps before admitting to organized crime."
Now it's his turn to consider your inquiry.Â
"Probably not, but I'm not good with words. You look like a smart girl, so I thought I won't sugarcoat it. I'm sure you already know that if you leave and rat us out I'll be throwing your chopped up remains in the nearby river. Or would you want to be shipped home instead? I'm a nice guy like that, hehe."
You return a crooked smile and purse your lips in the process. You'd rather not learn the percentage of truth in his humor anytime soon.Â
"You mentioned a stalker? I can guarantee you he won't follow here, miss. And if he's that dumb to wander on our turf, well, me and my guys always hang around the block. Leave him to me and I'll bring you his teeth in a box."Â
"I-...Why teeth of all the things?"
"Just easier to pull out, ya know." He winks and reaches for his back pocket, revealing an old pair of pliers with childish delight. "See, I'm a bit of a handyman, so I always have some tools on me."
Strangely enough, you're not as terrified as you would expect from someone in your shoes. Certainly your knees are weaker when compared to your pre-encounter state, but there's something about his demeanor that doesn't feel malicious or threatening. Like conversing with an old friend at a pub.Â
"Will I truly not get in trouble? You guys do your thing and I'm 100% not involved?"
"You have my word." And with that, as if closing the sale of his lifetime, he confidently slaps a stack of papers on the nearby counter and hands you a pen. "You already have my number, if anyone pisses you off just hit me up and I'll be at your service. Boss left everything to me."
No perverts and less of your monthly allowance going towards rent. Maybe it's your despair talking, but you've been persuaded nonetheless. You scribble your name in the designated field and shove the documents towards your new acquaintance.Â
"Pleasure doing business with you, miss (Y/N)." He cheerfully dangles the keys before dropping them in your hand and heads for the door.
"Oh, is shipping included in the rent?"
He stops and turns to you, mildly confused.
"You said if I mess up you'll ship my remains home. Do I pay for the postage myself, or is that part of the monthly tax?" You ask with a cheeky grin.Â
His eyes narrow in delight and you can tell he's greatly amused by your words.Â
"Nah, consider it a gift from me. Gotta treat a lady nice, 'specially if it's a pretty one like you."
And with that, you're alone again. You look around the room, trying to visualize your new home. It's already getting dark outside. Now that you've had the situation explained to you, you can definitely see what Daitou meant. There's the occasional police officer patrolling the street, and plenty of men dressed in similar fashion walking in small groups.Â
"And?"
Outside the building, a young man is leaning against the wall with a cigarette in his mouth. He seems to have been waiting for Daitou.Â
"It's done. Some cute foreigner is moving in." He lifts an arm in a flexing motion, patting his bicep in a congratulatory manner. "Boss will be surprised, eh?"
"You're fucking with me."
"What? You wanna go back upstairs and check?" He responds, appalled. "Might've taken longer than expected, but I told ya I can manage!"
"Are you sure you didn't threaten her or something? I still don't know what Boss was thinking when he asked a nutcase like you to deal with the civvies."Â
"Hey hey hey, I may not be all fancy speaking like you or Kazuya, but I'm not dumb. Matter of fact, she already signed the papers."
"I never said you're dumb. Just batshit crazy." The young man sighs and flicks his cigarette butt away, stomping on it.
"Let's go and tell the others."
#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere x darling#female reader#yandere yakuza#yakuza x reader#yandere imagine#yandere imagines#yandere oc#yandere original character#yandere mafia#mafia x reader#original work#oc x reader#male yandere x reader#x reader
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Looking to find a realtor to buy a house? Our team at Isabel Rodriguez Realty Group has got you covered! Our step-by-step guide will help you navigate the home buying process with ease. Let us help you find your dream home today!
#first time home buyer in San Antonio TX#cheap homes for sale in San Antonio TX#best agent in San Antonio TX#find a realtor to buy a house#best first time buyer mortgages 2023
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Wholesale deal. 4 lots next to each other in Florida for $17,900. Total size approximately one acre.
#real estate#realestate#realtors#land#properties#real estate investing#property for sale#investing#landforsale#cheap houses#florida#real estate in florida
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so is it okay to ask about the process you went thru to get a house? I'm really tired of renting and if it sounds doable I'd like to đĽš
well anon it really depends what state ur in rn, like home prices in say Texas are astronomical but home prices where I am, Ohio, are pretty dirt cheap as far as homes go. there's a lot that factors into the price of a home & it just so happens not many ppl move here, not many ppl like it here, there's little economic value here, so this place despite being a 3b 2b was listed at less than $100,000 which is how with a co signer I was able to get the mortgage for $560 (the place I rented before was $1700).
I'd say talk to someone at the bank you'd probably get ur mortgage through, give them an idea of ur financial position & if they think you'd be approved alone/w a spouse or if u need a cosigner like my aunt was for me. But keep ur expectations low, I know that sucks to hear but banks deny ppl even when it's obvious they could definitely afford the home no problem, there's also the whole long process of everyone basically going through ur entire financial history, and I mean through everything. u also gotta be prepared to answer a lot of questions about money, where it's comes from, how stable is ur employment, how stable is ur spouses or family members employment, what are large outgoing amounts of money for, what the deposits that aren't from jobs from, ect it can get kinda uncomfortable. & just bc a house is in escrow doesn't mean it's automatically urs, a deal can fall thru in escrow still so don't put all ur eggs in one basket or you might be fucked later.
bottom line I wouldn't try to go solo for a house, single ppl have terrible ownership rates bc it's just harder to buy when single. & don't buy a fixer upper just bc it's cheaper that's the devil talking u will find a billion more problems than what they tell u upfront and it will be a nightmare for years.
#idc what a realtor tells u you most likely cannot take on that decrepit husk of a house just bc the asking price is cheap#it will haunt you & you'll probably regret that choice a ton#its hard and unfair the whole way thru but if u decide to start the process good luck to you anon!#đ˛ ࣪â đ \ inbox
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100,000 dollars is not a lot of money.
it is also a lot more money than i will ever have. my student loans make up half of that - they're coming back, i'm told, like we all bounced back recently. the other day while paying for gas to go to work, i overdrew my account without knowing it.
i sat in the car and looked at the charge and tried to do the math. where the fuck is the money even going? i don't live extravagantly. i live in a hole in the ground, in an apartment the size of a sneeze; covered in ants. yes, i wanted to live close to a population center. maybe that's my fault. i've downloaded the apps and i've spoken to the experts and i've cut back on excess. i can't help the pharmacy bills or the medical debt.
i have a good, well-paying job. when i googled it to see if i was getting a fair salary, i found out i'd be making "upper middle class" money. which doesn't make sense - is "upper middle class" now just "able to afford a one-bedroom without a roommate". when i was younger, upper-middle meant a nice big house and a backyard and vacations and not flinching about eating at a resturant.
i was talking to my friend who is a realtor. he said 100,000 dollars is extremely cheap for housing. he's not wrong. 100,000 dollars would change my life. 100,000 dollars also won't really buy you anything. it could get you out of debt, potentially, if you were lucky and had a certain amount of scholarships to tack onto your degree. you could pay off the car and then have enough left over for "spending" money. how fucking amazing. one vacation, maybe two if you're thrifty. and then - like magic - the money would evaporate into nothing. people would sigh and tell you see, you should have put it into savings! like "upper middle class" people can't afford to value "actually living" over squirrelling wealth. you should spend your life only in scarcity. like that is what made the rich people all their real "actually a lot of money".
100,000 dollars would literally set me free. it also would just set me back to "earning normally" instead of paying down debt into infinity. god, do you know how many of us just want that? that our first thought is we could stop scrambling and just be free of debt if we won the lottery? that we don't even necessarily need to stop working - we just wouldn't have to worry about failing or falling?
and. at the same time. 100,000 dollars is next to fucking nothing.
#writeblr#me paying my taxes this year:#haha good to know im literally doing more for my community out of my tiny apartment#than most corporations will do in their entire scope! :) these motherfuckers will NEVER pay taxes!!!#bc they lobby others to be sure we CHOKE :) !!!#i hope this is clear like. this isn't someone being like ''haha if i got 100k it wouldn't be a big deal''#it's more like. the gap between corporations and the ppl WORKING in those corporations#has become HORRIFIC. 100k to the company i work for is like. pocket change to them.#and it is LIFE CHANGING for me.#they could cut me a check for 100k tomorrow and not even budge their margin of error
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ghost stan haunting the mystery shack after it closed down years ago.... walk with me.
18+!!!!!! minors dni!!
cw // dubcon (under the cut), monster??ghost sex, reader described with female genitalia????? idk how else to describe it
you moved to gravity falls a longggg time after the mystery shack closed down and the realtor in charge of the shack was sooo hype to just get it off their hands, so u got the place pretty cheap. you'd clean up the place, excited to renovate ur new home and explore the very old mystery spot.
it would start off as cold touches like youâre sweeping and you feel a cold hand on your back, youâre cooking and it feels like an arm wraps around your waist. you ignored it all, knowing the place was old and odd. so you ignored it. you ignored the cold spots, the occasional feel of a hand on your ass, the feel of someone watching you shower, the feeling that someone else was in the house with you because, at the end of the day, nothing bad has happened to you!
you ignored it all until one night. you were wrapped on your covers, warm and peacefully asleep, when a chill runs through your body as your blankets are pulled off. you open your eyes, blearily looking around for your blanket. your eyes focus on a blurry image of a man, standing at the edge of your bed. fear paralyzes you as you register the âŚ.
his hand was cold and rough, almost transparent as he slides it up your leg. you can hear his voice, but nothing registers in your head. he pulls down your pajama bottoms and slides a cold finger up your leg, you couldnât move, paralyzed in fear. you swallow a moan as he presses a thick finger against your underwear. âw-who are you?â you choke out as he starts to pull your underwear.
âiâve got a lot of names, baby.â the old man dips his head to your shoulder, whispering into your ear. âmr. mystery is one of my favorites though.â you try to stop him, but your hands go through him, unable to grab hold of him. he laughs at your antics and grips your legs tight. he smiles wide and pushes a cold, thick finger inside you. you clench around him, chills going up your spine. âcome on, cutie. just relax and youâll have fun.â you feel him pull out and push in, slowly, savoring the feel of your cunt clenching around his finger. âfuck,â he grunts, âso fucking hot.â you arch your back, as he pushes two fingers in, freezing you to your core. you moan as he brings you closer and closer to the edge, mind going numb.
but as you clench your thighs together, he pulls his fingers out. you whine, âplease, no- i need-â he laughs at your begging. he shoves his fingers into your mouth and you suck them clean, tasting yourself around two translucent fingers.
âiâll be back, pretty.â he grins. you blink and heâs gone.
ghost stan doesnât come back for a couple days after that and you notice when you realize no one had felt you up while you were in the shack. you had done some research on the shack in that time and realized that it was not a weird dream but the stan pines who was haunting the place. a couple more days go by, and you were getting restless, hoping to see the man and question him. you try some summoning bs you found on the internet- nothing, you call his name 3 times like beetlejuice in the living room- nothing, and you even try to find his grave or living relatives- nothing. at some point, you gave up and went back to convincing yourself it was just a dreamâŚ. until a month later when stan decided to pop back up.
#minors dni#yandere#x reader#yandere x reader#stan pines smut#stan pines x reader#stanley pines x reader#ghost kink#ghost sex#monster fucker#tw dubcon#tw dubious consent#yandere gravity falls#gravity falls smut#gravity falls#lowkey hate this now
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Makarov ⢠Baby Daddy Headcanons
While Makarov is a psychopathic maniac without a care for anyone, he'd definitely never abandon his own. This man values loyalty above anything and will never forsake one of his own, especially his baby mama and his child.
A visit from Makarov would be rare, but when he visited, he always made sure to bring a gift for his baby, and sometimes, even for you. Nothing cheap, of courseâa necklace worth thousands. See it as a reward for being an oh-so-good woman and bearing him a child.
Don't bother with work. Call in and never come back. Makarov has you covered for the rest of your life. He'd move you away from the dingy city and have you cozy with your baby in a house you'd never be able to pay off on your own. But you wouldn't need to worry about that - Makarov made sure to pay in cash to whatever sketchy realtor he knew would never reveal your location. If they did... let's just say they'd never sell another house again.
The new addition to the Makarov family would love their father. They'd cry all day in your arms, never stopping until their father's rough cheek scratched against their own, and he shushed them in his rough Russian manner.
The first time you handed over the tiny Makarov to their father would become a bittersweet memory.
"Make sure his/her neck is supported," you softly said while passing the baby into Makarov's arms, mindful of the delicate strength his/her little neck had yet to develop.
"Perfect," you said as Makarov gently held the baby in his arms, his neck crooked down as he watched his baby's eyelids flutter, their little pink cheeks, and tufts of hair on top their head. The baby tiny fist lifted into air, and Makarov placed his lips upon their tiny knuckles.
You leaned in and placed your lips on Vladimirs rough cheek.
He'd definitely pretend he wasn't obsessed with his newborn baby's scent. You'd walk into the nursery, and he'd shoot up from the crib and act like his nose wasn't all up in his baby's scalp.
He'd be fiercely protective of his family. No one, not even his closest allies, would know. Maybe Yuri, but he'd only tell him long after you gave birth.
If he had a son, he'd definitely plan to raise him in a macho-man way. Your son's fifth birthday gift would be a Russian prison knife from the Gulag. And no, he wouldn't care if you made a fuss about it being dangerous for a child.
"Now, why the hell would you give him that? What were you thinking?"
"He's nearly a grown man, and every grown man needs a knife."
"He's five!"
"I was gifted a rifle when I was five, so be grateful!"
Now, if he had a daughter, that would be a whole 'nother story. She would definitely be his little tsarina. All she would need to do is ask, and she'd have it in her little palm.
"She'll become a spoiled little brat if you keep spoiling her like that,"
"What, like you?"
"Not funny."
"Seems funny to me. Come, My Little Tsarina, let's go pick out one of your future cars."
He grew up poor and constantly surrounded by critters sneaking around in his home. He'd bring home stray cats to make sure no rats or mice would go near his baby.
Will sometimes sleep over. You'd both sleep in the same bed, and his razor-sharp training from when he was a soldier would come to good use. Any noise your baby made would wake him instantly.
He's paranoid as hell, so be ready for him to patrol the house multiple times a day. Your baby will grow up thinking it's normal for his father to have an automatic assault rifle in hand, walking around with murder in his eyes, ready to blow apart whoever dared target his family.
The baby would giggle every time their father passed by, and you'd watch boredly as he walked past. It got boring after the first ten times.
If there ever was a break in, God bless the idiot who did so. Not even his bones would be found.
Other than that, he's a cutie patootie when it comes to his baby. But like, a scary cutie patootie.
#cod mw2#mw2 x reader#cod makarov#makarov x reader#vladimir makarov x reader#cod mw3#mw2#vladimir makarov#makarov#cod mwii#call of duty#mw3 headcanons#headcanon#fluff
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