#charlie cox imagines

[caplanbuckybarnes]

Candles & Dinner (matt murdock)

Summary: Matt pampers you after a long day at work.

warnings: fluff

WC: 285

A/N: i'm reposting ALOT of older fics back on tumblr. Alot of them are going to be for the MCU fandom. If you'd like to be informed of these postings, here's my tag list.

Read on Ao3!

--

Walking into your apartment, you smelled the scent of your favorite candles. Inhaling deeply, you shut the door and took your jacket away from your shoulders and placed it in the coat rack by the door. Before you had the chance to turn around, arms wrapped around your body and a nose nuzzled deep into your shoulder.

“Well hello to you too, Matt,” you giggled as he pressed a chaste kiss to your neck before pulling away completely. “I suspect you’re the reasoning behind the candle smell?”

A chuckle fell from his lips as he intertwined his fingers with yours before he guided you to the kitchen. He motioned for you to sit down at the table full of your favorite meal. Blinking in surprise, you looked at him with an open mouth.

“Foggy helped me, and Luke,” he shuffled nervously on his feet for a moment as you looked from the table back at your boyfriend. “I know you’ve been really stressed out at work, your heart rate has been off the wall lately. I didn’t know what else to do for you.”

“Matty,” you sighed as you caressed his cheek, his face leaning into your touch. “This is the best thing I could have ever come home to.” Lightly, you brushed your mouth against his just before he disappeared down the hallway into the kitchen. A moment later, he returned carrying two wine glasses and a bottle of wine.

He placed the items on the surface of the table before he walked you over to the table and pulled your chair out before gesturing to you to sit down. He kissed the top of your head before rounding the table and seating himself.

--

please be kind and give this a reblog if you enjoyed <3

[l0vergirlwrites]

you’re losing me ; matthew murdock

warnings: pure angst, swearing, matthew is kind of a douche,

song inspo: “you’re losing me” by taylor swift

your mouth felt dry. it was hard to swallow your fear. your skin felt hot. the room felt smaller than normal.

the tension in matthew’s apartment was growing thick, like a cold morning fog. he wore a scowl on his face.

“say something! you need to say something” he broke the silence, standing up from the couch to stand across from you in the kitchen, but you held a hand up to stop him.

“no,” you halted. “just… no” you croaked, hands gripping the countertop to hold yourself up. your knees felt weak, like they were jelly. adrenaline was running through your veins as your stomach dropped to your feet.

“y/n, you know i wouldn’t cheat… you know me, cmon” he shook his head, adamant that you’d believe him. but you weren’t so sure.

“do i?” you asked aloud, as if you were trying to get matthew to rethink his words.

“because the matthew murdock i know wouldn’t lie to me about trailing around the city with his ex? or would he? oh my god…” saying the words out loud made you cover your face in your hands, heart banging against your rips as it started spiralling.

matthew just scoffed at your behaviour, causing you to raise your head up. “what? what is your problem matthew?”

“i knew you wouldn’t understand…” you stopped listening after he said those five words.

he’s been like this for weeks now, acting like you hardly know him as well as the lover from his past—but he’d say it in such twisted ways. you knew it was her influence—the power she had over him was unbearably strong. but, a little part of your heart had hoped that he wouldn’t act like this—that your matthew wouldn’t diminish you like this.

you knew his daredevil work was important to him, as well as defeating the hand. but the way hes explaining it to you as if you were incompetent in comparison to electra made this your final straw. the dam broke inside you, & you couldn’t stand to have your heart broken again.

“stop,” you cut him off loudly. “just stop it. you’re losing me matt—i-i can’t listen to your bullshit anymore” your voice croaked again when you pushed yourself off the countertop, brushing by matthew’s body quickly towards the bedroom.

“don’t like what i have to say? you’re going to walk away? like this is nothing?!” matthew followed you, the scowl on his face ever so present in your mind.

“don’t you dare act like i treat our relationship as anything but a priority. that’s mean matt, & you know it” your voice was on the edge of being ice cold, it’s freezer burn itching matthew’s skin as he nervously scratched the back of his neck.

you continued grabbing your purse. your keys. your wallet. your spare clothes. your phone charger. your toothbrush from his bathroom. you took it all.

“this is ridiculous” he deadpanned, walking over & grabbing your upper arm. “stop packing. don’t leave—“

“don’t touch me” you jerked away from his touch, pushing his hand off your arm in a flash.

matthew’s brows furrowed in offence. he was left speechless for a second.

“then talk to me!”

turning to face him, you elicited a sigh & crossed your arms. “okay, let’s talk”

“i’m unhappy. i feel lied to & pushed away as a second thought. i know you love me, but you act like you love her more—you let her sleep in my clothes on my side of the bed for god sakes matt… what do you expect me to do with that?!” you poured out your feelings to him, eyes glossy & head ringing with a headache as you gestured to your shared bed.

“she was hurt—she almost died y/n! what? do you want me to say i’m sorry for saving her life?”

“that will never justify you not being honest with me… especially when we’re engaged! why can’t you understand?” you stepped closer to him, crossing your arms tighter to your chest. your voice grew quieter with your last words, hoping you’d get him to see your point of view.

he still gripped his black mask in his left hand. it made you laugh internally. bet he wants to be out there than here right now….

“you’re hurting me matt… can’t you see where i’m coming from? or sense it? you’ll fight for her, risk your life for her… but you can’t fight for me? or choose me?”

matthew felt his heart drop as realization started kicking in, but he was stubborn. he didn’t want to be wrong about this. “i don’t understand—i was trying to protect you y/n… i-i…” unsure of what to say, matthew just stood there at arms reach.

tears were slowly falling down your cheeks as you scoffed at him this time. “you think lying is equal to protecting? not like this… definitely not like this”

“but you’re the one i’m marrying—i’m your fiancé. doesn’t that show that i choose you?” matthew’s point was valid, so you sighed in slight agreement.

“but, you’ve cancelled on me multiple times. you’re barely here! i sleep alone, cook alone, clean alone, shower alone… you’re only here when you need something for her. that doesn’t feel like you’re choosing me”

brushing past him again with your purse in hand, you walked towards the apartment door. “hey, where are you going?” he questioned, trialing behind you with determination.

“away”

“when are you coming back?”

the sound of your engagement ring being placed on the credenza echoed in the apartment. “i don’t know” you swallowed again when you took your hand away from your ring, knowing matthew wasn’t taking your action well.

“no—no. don’t go” he pleaded with you, his hand coming up to brush your arm but you stepped away.

your heart strings were pulling. you didn’t know it’d be this hard. “i can’t marry you if you act like you don’t want me—like you don’t love me. i’m not putting myself through that anymore” you had to turn your back to him because it got too hard to look at his melancholic expression.

he stood there like a statue—still with no movement. matthew wanted to pull you into his arms, tuck his head into your neck & keep you close. but at the same time, he knew he couldn’t. he had to let you go.

“you know, it’s kinda funny,” you commented with your hand on the door knob. “you fight your clients & you’ll fight for the city, but you can’t fight to make me stay, or prove me wrong… you’re just letting me go,”

you looked at him again, seeing how he was a shell of the man you grew to love over the last few years. this felt wrong—the whole situation felt so wrong. but you had to do this for you. he needed to get his life together.

“i just thought you’d try harder than this, murdock”

& with that, you pulled the door open & stepped out of the apartment with a heavy heart. matthew stood there stunned as he heard you push the elevator button, walk inside the compartment, & sigh when the doors closed.

he slid down the door frame, holding his head in his hands with his fingers tightly gripping his hair. he felt angry. disgusted with himself. but he felt even worse when he heard your quiet sobs from the elevator.

he lost you. his daylight—& now all matthew had was the loneliness of midnight.

you lost your daylight too, but you lost it a while ago.

[websterss]

THE LOVE THAT WAS ALL ALONG (1) — TRISTAN THORN

SUMMARY: What Tristan expected to be a normal nightly visit to your bedroom, turns into one of questions and a burning desire to find out what you're keeping from him. There's just one problem, you won't tell him what's wrong.

WARNING(S): angst, some fluff

WORD COUNT: 3,827

PAIRING: Tristan Thorn x fem!Reader

A/N: I hope you like it! Feedback is appreciated and always welcomed!

MASTERLIST

Not a day passed without that of a pebble thumping against your bedroom window. All the while you tried to retain your focus back on your book. A second tap would soon follow after and you’d be forced to put your placemark within the center of the pages you failed to finish yet again for another night.

You release an annoyed huff as you go over to your windowsill and push the door of it open wide. You then look down and find the culprit responsible for disrupting your nightly reading.

His charming chagrin plastered on his face was making it difficult for you to stay angry. You can’t fight your very own smile as you shake your head at your best friend. “Most people would knock you know.” You tease.

“Where would the fun be in you opening a door?” Tristan quipped.

You can’t help but roll your eyes at the response. Tristan always was the one to take extra measures, not needed at times too. “And what if I had simply decided to ignore you for the rest of the evening?” You ask. You raised a brow down at him.

“Then I would tell you that I’ve got about five more pebbles at hand and am only using a quarter of my strength.” He grinned.

You huff a laugh, knowing true and well in your gut he would do exactly that. Tristan was stubborn in the sense that he was determined to get his desired wishes no matter the cost. It was both a lovely and annoying trait of his. “You’re insufferable.” You say though your tone held no true malice, it was as if you simply stated a fact of life. “You wouldn’t dare break my window.” You pout.

It was only then that Tristan taunted you with a raise of his arm, twisting his body at his waist to ready his aim. A faint smirk slowly appeared on his face.

You gasp and quickly stick your hand out to stop him. “Okay! Okay! I yield!” You surrender, not needing to waste any energy playing out this silly game. You have had nights in the past where this very act had gone on for as long as two and a half hours. You were not looking to waste time. “Now will you get up here, you nuisance?” You ask with a soft laugh.

“No need to fuss I’m coming up to you.” Tristan breathed a laugh at your sudden withdrawal. Pride flooded within him as the same taunt worked on you once more. Last time, Tristan threatened to yell at the top of his lungs if you hadn’t let him up. Perhaps he should consider reusing it again.

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes as he chuckled. Always so cocky, that Tristan. You watch as he starts to climb the side of your home like a spider, his movements are fluid and natural without a single falter. His hands grilled the edges to haul himself up and into your room. And suddenly your mind takes a wander to what else his hands could do. Clearing your throat you shake that thought away quickly as he easily swings inside. You take a second to look at him this time, the candles lit on your dresser allowing you to fully view his attire.

“You look nice?” You eyed him from head to toe.

Tristan looked down at himself then looked back up at you with uncertainty. “Are you asking me or telling him?” He emits a soft laugh. “Do I not look okay?”

You give a small laugh yourself, your eyes still roaming his figure up and down. “No, no. The complete opposite of not okay. Just a bit different than how you usually dress.” You state. Normally Tristan isn’t all about formalities, but he also can’t let a single piece of his untucked shirt be shown to any poor soul, not without his vest that is. This time around, he looked…presentable, and handsome with his nice dress shirt and coat, even the bowler hat he wore was a surprise to see. Though that was not a bad thing, it was quite lovely to see him less casual than normal. But the ‘why’ for such a change tonight had you questioning whether he was going somewhere, or worse yet to someone. The latter you didn’t want your thoughts to linger on much longer.

“Do you think the hat is a bit much?”

“You do look like quite the gentleman with it, I will say.” You muse, giving the brim of his hat a little flick with your finger. It was a nice hat, a fine black color, not too tall, not too short. “It's suitable for a young man. If I didn’t know any better I would assume you were off to see Victoria?” You tease. Only when he didn’t mirror your grin or faint laughter, did your heart begin to sink. Your smile fades into a thin line.

“I am…” He says with certainty.

Your breath hitches and for an aching moment, you forget how to breathe. Your chest becomes constricting with each second of silence passing between you two. You swallow hard trying to regain your senses quickly. Your throat feels painfully dry and the words stuck in it refuse to escape. “Y-you’re going to see Victoria?” You croak. It sounded weak, and a pang of self-disappointment hit you with how pathetic you sounded. Quickly you clear your throat to try sounding more nonchalant and failing quite horribly. “Tristan, you can’t be serious? She treats you poorly!” You mock with a laugh.

“I am quite serious. I’ve told you of my feelings for her. They remain intact and I am to tell her that I love her tonight.”

“You’ve told her that about a dozen times before already! And each time she has tossed you aside like a crumpled piece of paper. She never takes you seriously.” You sigh, shaking your head. Your face twisted with sadness and frustration. It broke your heart every time to see your best friend rejected in such a horrid and cruel way. And for a woman, one who didn’t truly care about him, who was only in love with the idea of gaining another man's infatuation. You knew there was no changing his mind, his persistence didn’t allow for opinions to falter his plans. That damn determination of his. “And each time you go running back to her.” You murmur under your breath.

“She just doesn’t know it yet, but we are meant to be!” He exclaims. Reaching forward to hold you on your upper arms. “I’ll get her to see me as I am, as the man who can show her how loved she is. I’m going to prove my love and devotion to her. I’ll do a grand gesture. Something big will surely convince her.”

Your heart feels a pang at the way he speaks about her. He is so utterly convinced, so foolishly hopeful for someone who will not reciprocate his love. Part of you can’t help being envious of Victoria with how much he truly cares for her. You wish only he could see that you’re right here in front of him and that you could be the one to make him truly happy. To give him the love he wishes for Victoria to reciprocate. But he’s stubborn, much like you. “That isn’t love though, Tristan…Love shouldn’t come from only one half.” You ask. You raise a hand to touch his cheek, his big brown eyes watching you with turmoil and confusion. Perhaps he thinks you don’t understand, and maybe you don’t. Who would understand why someone would continue to pursue a woman who showed nothing but unrequited love? “Why does it only need to be you making grand gestures? What has Victoria done to show you she is just as much interested in you and your time as you are about her?”

“She doesn’t need to—“

Your head snaps up at his response. “Doesn’t need to?!” You exclaim. The bitterness in your tone surprised you as much as it startled him. “That is the entire point of any relationship! It is effort and commitment from both ends!” Your eyebrows are furrowed and you find yourself clenching your fists at your side, fighting the urge to grab his collar and shake him. You have never been so utterly annoyed, so frustrated with him. Your stupid little hopeless in love, Tristan.

“I have a plan. It will all work out, believe in me, Y/n.” He pleads.

Your shoulders sag and a heavy exhale leaves your lips. Of course, your rationalism would not get through to him. You don’t even know why you thought for a moment that it could make him realize the flaws in his logic. “I always do,” You say at last. “But it never gets easier to see you like this, Tristan.” Your tone had softened at the end. You place a hand gently on his chest, right over his heart. “I always carry your best interest at heart with me. You know this of me. I simply prefer not to see you get hurt, especially by Victoria.”

“I know you do. Where would I be if it weren’t for you and your beautiful heart?” He attempts to make light of this heartbreaking conversation.

Your lips twitch at his poor attempt to lighten the mood, yet you can’t help but be touched by the thought. You would always be there for him no matter what. “You know exactly where you’d be, right in some sort of trouble that you’d get yourself caught in, and wouldn’t be able to get yourself out of.” You tease. Your thumb gently rubs his chest against the fabric of his shirt. “I’d have preferred it, you getting into trouble, anyone else would have sufficed though, just not Victoria, anybody else but her.” You admit.

“Why do you dislike her so much?”

Your hand slowly drops from his chest as your frustration comes back. “You need to ask that? She treats you horribly, Tristan. She takes your heart for granted!” You exclaim. Your arms are crossed over your chest now. “How many times has she laughed in your face when you’ve tried to win her affection? How many times has she brushed something you’ve gifted to her as though it was meaningless?” You raise a hand, your fingers slowly raising as you continue listing how Victoria has treated him poorly. “How many other men's hands has she accepted in front of you? She is completely unaware of how truly special you are.” How special you are to me, you wanted to say.

You were taken back when he leaned forward and pecked your temple sweetly. Your heart hammering against your chest as you met his soft gaze. “Tristan…”

He grins softly at your reaction. That one of surprise and embarrassment. You’ve always been such a sweet soul and he knew he could always get you flustered when he was touchy with you. He loved the way the warmth of your hands would travel up to your cheeks, and your gaze, how it would turn away timidly, but he found it endearing. No matter what he did to surprise you it always made your heart flutter. if only he knew just how much it affected you.

“Shhh.” He murmured, his hands coming around to wrap you up in a tight hug.

He stays close to you, his nose tucked into your locks. His hand raised to rest gently on your cheek, his calloused thumb rubbing gently over your soft skin. “Have I ever told you that you are the kindest, most compassionate person I’ve ever met?” He murmurs. His breath was warm on your skin as his breath lightly brushed against your neck. “Anyone would be the luckiest person in the world to have you, I’m lucky to have you in my life.” He breathes a smile. “You’re my best friend in the entire world, and I’m lucky to have met you.”

You wondered if he could hear your heart tearing in two.

“I’m your only friend Tristan. Remember I’ll always- love you as much as I hold your best interest.” You hesitate to admit it.

Your stuttering and wavering words are caught by him, and you hate how the very sound of your voice falters. You didn’t want to come off as fragile, but no matter what you could never hold together your feelings for Tristan.

His nose is still buried deep in your locks, his large hand now cups your cheek gently. He tilts your head to meet his eyes, a small smile on his face. “You alright?” He murmurs. You despised how well he could read you. Unlike the pages of your unfinished novel, your next moves were predictable. One little change of notation in your tone and he’d be bugging you until you caved into telling him.

“Never better…” You look away from his lingering concern. You don’t miss the furrow of his brows as he palms your cheeks, then your forehead with his calloused hands.

Tristan’s worried eyes roam your face, searching for a sign of distress but is unable to find any. With a frown he continues to keep his palms on your cheeks, he didn’t release you just yet. He was sure there was something not quite right with you. But what could be troubling you? He tilts your head up again, his deep eyes locked on yours now. He knew you weren’t telling the truth yet something prevented you from doing so. Even as much as he hated to admit it, he hated it, that you were being closed off.

“You look feverish…” He mumbles.

His hands then find your arms, pulling them away from where they are folded across your chest. He gently holds your hand in his, turning it so your palm faces the ceiling. He looks over the back of your hand, then the front, then back again. He then gently holds your chin with his index finger, tilting your head so you are forced to look at him again. “You’re all flushed.” He comments, worry etched upon his brow. "Y/n are you sure you're alright?"

"Tristan I am well, honestly." You grabbed hold of his wrist and held them in place. "Please don't fuss over me, it will only add stress to your visit with Victoria. Which you should be getting along to." You gasp as you look around your room.

Tristan frowns, clearly not believing your word. He wants to tell you no, that he doesn’t want to go and see Victoria anymore, at least not till he is certain you are well. He knew you well enough that you would be stubborn too, that you wouldn’t let him win this one no matter what he did, you never did when it came to your feelings.

He huffs. “You’re as stubborn as a mule.” He says. But he listens to you anyway. “You’ll be alright until I get back, will you? You promise?”

"With my entire heart." You muse then remember what you were in search of. "Oh yes, here." You walk over to the vase on your nightstand and remove the bouquet from where they sat all pretty. "You'll need these." You smile as if you hadn't just taken out your own flowers for his benefit.

Tristan raises a brow once you pull out the bouquet, tilting his head to the side. He recognized those as the flowers you had been arranging just last week. He raises his other hand up, placing it gently on top of yours. “Y/n, why would you give me your flowers? No, you went on a rant about how long it took you to find them. No.” He protests, his brown eyes wide with bewilderment. He tried to take the bouquet from your grasp, to put them back, but you held them tight, not allowing him to snatch them from you.

Tristan is taken back momentarily by your actions. You seemed to be determined for him to leave, but he couldn’t help but be grateful for your thoughtfulness. You were truly an angel sent to him and yet he could see it. He felt guilt for that as well.

Taking the bundle of flowers from your hand, he couldn’t help but admire them while you moved to sit on the edge of your bed. The flowers were gorgeous, and the petals were a mixture of white and a soft yellow. Daisy's. He took a quick sniff of them, the sweet scent of their fragrance filling his senses.

"They'll grow back…" You mutter as you fidget with a loose thread on your blanket.

Tristan looks up upon hearing your mutter, a hint of sadness in your voice. He watched you as you continued to tug at the loose threads on your bed uncoiling it from its knitted form. He wasn’t certain what had gotten into you, you weren’t acting like yourself. “Spring won't come for another two months, Y/n. You waited for them to be in bloom.” He says softly. “You put in a lot of time and hard work into the arrangement, it doesn't feel right. I don't want you to give them up for me." Tristan glances down at the bundle in his hand. "I can always get Victoria another."

"Right…yes of course." You huff with a faint smile tugged on your lips.

Tristan's eyes softened at your smile, no matter how much he wished for it, it didn’t reach your eyes. Something was off about you, yet you were keeping silent about it. He took a hesitant step forward, almost as if he were afraid to even touch you now. His eyes remained locked onto your form on the bed, his expression tight and thoughtful. “You’re acting unusual.” He murmurs.

"I've just been more tired than usual, Tristan. Nothing to worry your pretty head about." You try to make light of the tension.

Tristan is not having it. He would not brush off your strange behavior. Not when his gut was telling him something was wrong. You were not being honest with him and he knew it. His jaw clenches at your attempt to make light of his worries.

He moves over to kneel in front of you. He gently places the flowers down beside you on the bed before taking your hands into his own. His fingers gently rub over the back of your hands, his touch is tender and soft, just like he is. His eyes remained locked on yours, the worry in his gaze is evident.

"Tristan-"

Tristan softly shushes you, his fingers still gently caressing and massaging your skin. You’ve always known him as a stubborn and determined soul and you knew it as he began to cut you off. He wouldn’t let this go, he refused to believe you were ‘just tired’. Something was troubling you and he was not going to let it go. “You’re not just tired, Y/n. You expect me to believe that?” He says softly, his eyes searching your face. "Something has upset you and I intend to get to the bottom of it until I know."

"Well, you can't, not right now at least, you have a Victoria to win over."

Tristan’s head shakes. He wanted to laugh at your stubbornness but he knew that would be a terrible move. You were both equally hard-headed that was for sure. He sighs, you were doing your damndest to avoid talking about what was bothering you. His gaze softened, and his hold on your hands tightened ever so slightly.

“Y/n. Please.” He implores. “Just talk to me. You’re upset about something. Tell me what is bothering you."

"Tomorrow."

Tristan's shoulders slumped, it was clear he was defeated. But only for now. He knows you weren’t one to back down and knew there was no use in trying to get it out of you now. However, that wouldn’t stop him from trying again tomorrow.

He looks down at where his hands are holding yours. “Promise me that tomorrow, you’ll tell me. No more excuses or brushing it aside. I want to know what’s bothering you as soon as the day breaks even.” He quietly requests for the simple favor.

"I promise…Now- leave or you're opportunity of reaching a lifetime of happiness will surely close." You muster a laugh and begin shoving him off your bed towards the open window.

Tristan stands to his feet once you push him away from the bed. He doesn’t miss the way you’re trying to shove him out the window and away from you. He frowns at your persistence, he hates the idea of leaving you here, upset about something you won't tell him, yet he can’t fight your insistence to leave.

“Fine, fine.” He mutters. He begins to climb out of the window, turning his head once more to glance back at you. His smile reached the corners of his eyes. “Tomorrow. I'll find you.”

You go to grab one of your pillows, aiming it ready to throw it at his face. Your throw a failed miscalculation as it lands before his feet. Tristan does his best to maintain his chuckle. "That…is very upsetting. It is nowhere near my head let alone near myself."

"Out!"

Tristan rolls his eyes at your command. “Yes, yes.” He mutters, and with slight reluctance, he turns to finish his descent out of your window. He glances up for a moment, locking eyes with you, the soft smile is still on his face. "You better rest up. You won't get rid of me so easily tomorrow. I'll be even more of a nuisance. Keep the flowers, I'll find more." He teases with a crooked grin, then is out of your view.

"Oh, joy..." You finally let your shoulders fall as you slump back against your pillows, the muscle ache and tiredness you felt throughout your body becoming more prominent. You forgot how easily you forgot about your state, especially when Tristan was able to distract you from the pain.

Tristan’s concern only grows as he takes notice of the way you blow out the candles almost immediately as he hits the ground. His brows furrow at your hurried state to have him leave, to go to Victoria, and to dismiss any chance he had to talk with you through what you are currently struggling with. It was eating him alive and it was making him second-guess treading down the streets to Victoria's house. He grips his hat, sparing your window one last glance before placing it on top of his head. Pocketing his hands for the walk away from your bedroom window and towards the girl he loves. Yet he can't help but let the nagging feeling of guilt eat at him as he puts one foot in front of the other.

[kendallsroyco]

I need someone to show Charlie this tweet 💀

[sunflowersandsapphires]

Someone pls sedate me. May I request Matt and Frank with a reader who bites them

Ohhhhhhh they’d be INTO this I fear. Thoughts below the cut! (I hope it’s ok I went a smutty direction with this. If you want something more fluffy I will happily write that too, just let me know!)

It’s widely known that Matt is a masochist, but Frank is too! And we all need to talk about that more. It would be good for society.

Anyways,

Whether it’s a sensory thing or a kink thing, the men might be surprised when you ask them but I think they’d READILY agree.

Matt is so turned on by the desperation lacing the edges of your question that he hands you a limb, cockily demanding that you “do your worst” while he thrusts into you.

I think Matt would looooove receiving hickeys. As much as he wants to mark his “territory”, his partner being possessive over him would be a HUGE turn on.

He’d run his fingers over the marks you left behind, working himself up allllll over again.

Frank on the other hand would be a bit more confused by your need to bite him, not that he’d object to anything you wanted from him. It wasn’t exactly going to cause lasting harm.

He’d let you gnaw away at him, grinning smugly when he could feel you moan against his skin “attagirl. Let it all out for me.”

Over time, you two would find a great rhythm. He would absolutely be working your need to bite into foreplay, exposing his shoulders/neck/whatever to you and raising an eyebrow. “Go on, doll. Know you wanna.”

This is all I have for now! Let me know if you want more!!

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Tell Me a Lie

Matt Murdock x Reader

Words: 4617

Summary: Months of hell lead you to one moment- finding out your boyfriend is really alive. After figuring out where he’s been hiding, you concoct a plan- a very stupid, very dangerous plan- to draw him out. 

Notes: This is a terrible summary, but whatever. I finally started season three and I thought putting the reader in this situation would be really interesting. Obviously, his relationship with Elektra wasn’t the same, but the whole self-destructive Matthew is here and ready for angst. I’m imagining this kinda between the episodes where Matt goes to the hotel and the prison, but doesn’t really follow the plot of the episodes, just my own. This is also just a mess, but oh well. (And I know this is kind of what Bella does in New Moon, but I kind of dig it so I won’t apologize haha)

Warnings: Attempted assault, violence, abandonment, alcoholism literally looking for danger (obviously, spoilers for season three)

More Matt Imagines: HERE

-

It didn’t smell like him anymore. Such a weird, stupid complaint, but it made you sick to your stomach to breathe in the musty air of the apartment. 

You sat up, nursing your head in your hand, still pounding from the night before. Not that you’d slept, but hangovers still found a way to bite you in the ass. It was getting pathetic. Not that you cared. And not that your friends had actually used that word. 

‘Concerning’ was Foggy’s favorite. 

He could have his concern. 

You chased the numb. 

Anything was better than remembering he wasn’t here and the apartment you’d just started to share didn’t smell like him anymore. 

You got out of bed on shaking limbs, feeling the nausea roll over you. You swayed, wondering if you’d throw up again. You didn’t. 

You went to the kitchen and made a pot of coffee to pull you out of the haze. Karen and Foggy were coming by today to talk about rent. You had to seem at least somewhat put together or they would try and talk you into getting help. Getting help meant moving on. Moving on meant giving up. Giving up meant lying to yourself. Admitting that he was dead and he wasn’t coming back. 

But Matt Murdock wasn’t dead. 

You could feel it. 

The pounding at the door felt like knocking on your skull. You groaned. 

Foggy stepped inside. 

“Morning,” he greeted with his usual chipper smile. 

You didn’t understand it. How he could still seem so happy after everything that happened. Then again, things went rather well for him after…

You shook the thoughts from your head. This wasn’t Foggy’s fault. 

“Hey,” you croaked. You took a long, burning drink from your caffeinated cup and let its effects wash over you. “I thought you two were coming together?” 

“Karen had… other stuff.” Foggy peaked around the corner, plastering a smile across his face. He figured he’d ease into the news. Especially because you looked- well- you looked the way you usually did these past few weeks. “But she says hi.” 

You nodded and took another drink. “Coffee?” 

“I already had some, thanks.” 

He stood silently. 

You stood silently. You raised a brow. “You can sit down, Foggy.” 

“Right. Thanks.” He nodded awkwardly and took a seat on the couch. So much for playing it cool. 

You set your mug to the side and leaned on the counter, fingers gripping the edge like a lifeline. 

“What happened, Foggy?” You stared at the back of his head and felt that familiar squeezing, wrenching breathlessness in your chest. The same feeling when Claire dragged you out of Midland Circle. The same feeling when you watched the building fall. The same feeling when Matt didn’t walk out. “Is it… is it Matt? Did they find him?” 

“No, it’s not about-” He blew out a sigh. “God, you haven’t seen the news then?” 

You hurried around to stand in front of him, panic still evident in your exhausted eyes.

Foggy had to look away. 

“Why, what’s on the news?” 

He gulped. “Maybe you should sit down.” 

“Just tell me what happened,” you scoffed. The sound came out as a nervous laugh, but on the inside, you were screaming. 

His blue eyes met yours. 

“Wilson Fisk made a deal with the feds. He’s out of prison.” 

You blinked. The crushing in your chest was replaced by your heart stopping. 

“What?” You choked out. Of all the things you were expected to hear, Fisk’s name wasn’t one of them. 

“Well, not out exactly. He’s apparently giving them information that’s made him a target in his old prison so they’re keeping him in a cushy penthouse for ‘safety purposes.’” He spat each word out. 

You put a hand on the back of the chair for support. “Fisk is free?” 

“Like I said, he isn’t free, but-”

You held up a hand to stop him.“Where’s this hotel?” 

-

The courtyard was absolute mayhem. Reporters scurried in every direction, each harassing a different agent for information they wouldn’t get. Matt dodged in between them. The noise made his still recovering head pound, but he could still pick out enough to get through. He ducked his head when he heard Karen’s voice, a small moment of panic almost making him turn around. 

He kept moving. 

The crowds didn’t surprise you. And neither did seeing the familiar blonde head weaving through the groups with determined strides. You hurried after her, almost bumping into the man in front of you, but he stepped out of the way just in time. 

“Karen!” You called. 

Gold strands whipped around. Her clear blue stare cut through the crowd. 

“Y/N?” She said, pushing through to you. “What the hell are you doing here?” 

“So it’s true.” You tilted your head to the top of the building, its windows reflecting the sun in blinding brightness. “Wilson Fisk is up there?” 

She sighed. “Foggy told you then?” 

“If you’re planning on an ‘it isn’t safe for you to be here’ speech, save it,” you snapped. “I could tell you the same thing.” 

She bit her cheek, looked you over, and determined you looked sober enough. “Alright, follow me.” 

Matt couldn’t move. He tried to force his feet forward, but the heavy beating of his heart filled his ears and made it impossible to navigate the space around him. 

Your voice. Your scent. Even your heartbeat stood out amongst the dozens of people there. And for a moment, just a moment, he wanted to turn around. 

“Promise me we’ll go on that trip we talked about, yeah?” You laughed, though the air was salty with your tears and your voice shook. He kissed your lips for the last time.

“I promise.” 

But that wasn’t what haunted Matt for the last few months. Your sweet words of promise and hope stung, but they weren’t what kept him from going to you. Your screams were. 

“Let me go! Matt! No! Matty! I won’t leave him! Matt!” Even with countless floors between, Matt could hear your gut-wrenching screams as the others dragged you out of the building just before it blew. “Matt! Please! Matt!”

“Matt?” 

It took him a moment to realize that your voice now wasn’t from his memory. It was now.

You’d seen him. But judging by the direction, there was a chance you hadn’t seen his face. He could ignore you and chances were, you’d think you were crazy. Just another offense he’d committed against you. 

He wanted to turn around, to hold you and kiss your lips again and tell you he was okay and everything was going to be okay. That he was still your Matt. 

But the man you fell in love with was gone. He was buried under Midland Circle. 

Matt kept walking. 

-

You’d seen him. As crazy as it was, you knew it was him. He’d heard you. He must have because he stopped- just for a second, but he stopped. Karen may not have believed you, though you could tell she wanted to, but it didn’t matter. 

It was Matt. 

Somehow, it didn’t make any sense but it all made sense at the same time. He was going after Fisk. Of course, he was. Not even the grave couldn't stop your Matt from protecting his city. From protecting you. 

What you didn’t understand is why he kept walking. He acted like you weren’t there, but he of all people couldn’t have simply not noticed you. He’d left you there on purpose. 

He’d left you.

You paced the apartment with your hands raking through your hair with one question on your mind. 

Why? 

Sure, Matt would always use the excuse of protecting you before, but this time felt different. Had you done something? Had you not done enough at Midland Circle? What happened to him? 

Was it your fault?

The explosion was your idea and it buried him. Did he blame you as much as you blamed yourself?

Your feet halted in front of the closet door. Behind the door was a box. Inside the box was the emptiness that haunted your every waking moment for the past you didn’t even know how many days anymore. Your fingers clutched at the neck of the bottle on the table. The drink burned. 

None of it mattered. ‘Why’ didn’t matter. What mattered was that he was out there and he left you and as the burn raced down your throat you knew what you needed to do. 

And you knew where he might be.

-

The gentleness of your touch eased the sting of the disinfectant as you dabbed it on his wounds. It wasn’t the first night he’d come back cut and beaten, but you didn’t let your worry deter your movements. He came back. That’s what mattered. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked, your voice as soft as your motions. You touched a particularly sore spot and he winced. As you went to draw your hand away, he caught it in his, fingers grasping at yours, still clenched around the towel. 

“Can we just… sit for a while?” He breathed. 

You nodded. He wiped away any blood remaining on his skin and set the towel aside. His arms wrapped around you as he pulled you to his chest. He listened to your heartbeat. You listened to his. 

Matt remembered the woman he’d come across earlier that night. Two men had jumped her. They were going to take what they wanted and leave her for dead. He’d taken his time beating them senseless while she got away. But her screams still echoed through his head. 

He tensed beneath you and you looked up at him through your lashes. 

“What is it?” 

“Nothing.”

You sat up. “Matt.” 

“It’s nothing,” he managed a laugh. “Really. Just come here.” He coaxed you back to him, but the tension was still there. He breathed in your presence and let out a low sigh. His arms tightened around you. “I’d never let anything happen to you.” His tone was different. Almost afraid. 

You drew lines on his chest. “I know.” 

“And I’d never hurt you, or at least mean to, anyway, but I know that I have and I’m-”

“Matty.” You crawled up so you were beside him, taking his face in your hands. “All I ask is that you come home at the end of the night.” You kissed his cheek. “In one piece, preferably.” He chuckled and you pressed your lips to his. You whispered in between kisses. “Just come home.” 

-

He talked about this place sometimes. Not often. Getting Matt to open up about his childhood was like pulling teeth, but in those last few months together, he’d started to trust you enough to let you in. 

This felt like a betrayal of that. Using your knowledge to expose him. To confront him for leaving you behind. A sober you might have thought of that. But the whiskey-fueled your anger, the rum your despair, and everything else blocked out any logical thought. 

What was the word Foggy used? 

Right. 

Concerning.

“Alright, Matthew,” you called out. Your voice was barely more than a hoarse whisper as you tried to hold back sobs. The wind stung the streaks of tears on your cheeks, but the more you tried to wipe them away, the more they fell. You took a drink. “This is it. Now or never.” 

You waited. You gave him a chance to stop you. 

“You always said you would never let anything happen to me, right? That you’d never hurt me.” You held your arms out at your sides. “Well, here we are, you goddamn liar!” Your voice echoed through the street. He would have been able to hear you for blocks, but standing just outside his damn door had to be good enough. “Come out, Matt!”

“Dude, check out this crazy bitch,” a voice said from behind you. 

Your stomach flipped. You swallowed the nervous bile in your throat. This was part of the plan. Sure, you thought you’d have to do a little more seeking, but this worked even better. There was only one way your tangled-up mind could figure that would get Daredevil to come out to play. You just hoped he would bring your Matt with him. 

You turned around. Two men stood in front of you, both of them with eyes scanning your body and lips forming smirks. Oh yeah. They were perfect. 

“What did you just say to me?” You tried to make your voice sound more confident than you actually felt. You wanted their anger, not their pity. 

“Hey, no need to be like that, I was just kidding,” the taller one said, holding his hands up in mock innocence. “I was just about to tell my buddy that you look a little lost.”

“Yeah, maybe she could use our help,” his friend agreed. “Do you want our help?” From the sound of his tone ‘help’ was the last thing he was offering. 

They both stepped towards you. 

And then a thought broke through your intoxicated, reckless mind. 

What if Matt really was dead?

It made you freeze. It almost made you sober. 

What if you just saw some guy that looked like him? What if you’d imagined it all together? What if all this time you’d been hoping- hell, even praying- that he would come back and he was still down there, at the bottom of Midland Circle, crushed and bloody and… gone? 

The men took another step forward, looking equally confused as they were intrigued. 

What if there was no one around to save you?

You held your head high. 

You hoped they’d kill you.

Either way, at least you would know. 

“You alright there, sweetheart?” The tall one asked. Sweetheart. The word stung. It belonged to someone else. 

You didn’t say anything and just started swinging. Fist to teeth, then foot against knee, you actually managed to do some damage before the friend grabbed your arms from behind. You stomped on his foot as hard as you could. Just because this was part of your plan didn’t mean you were going to make it easy for them. It had to at least look like you tried. For Foggy and Karen. 

The thought of the two of them threw you off. It made you blink, which allowed the lead prick to get a hold of your hair and use it to throw you to the ground. 

“You wanna play it that way, fine,” he growled. 

“Hair pulling?” You sneered up at him. “What, did your little sister teach you that move?” 

“Mouthy little bitch.” He brought his heel down on your head. Hard. It probably should have knocked you out, but you could still see through blurred vision with darkness around the edges. They started to walk away. 

“W-wait,” you said. The feet at the edge of your vision stopped. “Wait, come here.” You beckoned him to you with your hand. He crouched down. “Is that all you’ve got, pussy?” 

The hit came faster than you prepared for, knocking the breath out of your lungs. He kicked. And kicked. And kicked. Blood filled your mouth. You thought you heard a knife click open, but then everything went silent. 

And there was only one pair of feet.

A grunt. A thud. A body hitting the pavement. 

“What the…” Your main assailant gasped.  

You blinked, trying to see what was going on.

“Hey, man, she started it, I swear.” Another grunt. Another thud. Another body hit the pavement. 

A masked face appeared over yours.  

You smiled through the pain. “I knew it.” 

He took off the black band, revealing his panicked face. It was the last thing you saw before the darkness in your head took over. 

-

Matt carried you downstairs, every sense tuned into the creaking of your broken ribs, the smell of the blood leaking from your lips, your head, your nose. He focused on the sound of your heart. It was still beating. 

It was still beating.

“Sister!” He called. 

Sister Maggie, in all her wise-cracking wisdom, had known to be there. Matt didn’t know how, but not for the first time he was grateful for her presence. She helped without him having to ask. 

“Is she breathing?” She asked. 

“Barely. Her ribs are broken. I-I can’t tell how hard she hit her head.” He laid you on the bed, still listening to the semi-steady thump thump, thump thump. 

“Who is she?” 

He didn’t answer. Instead, his hands roamed your features, the gentle curve of your cheek now split with a bleeding gash. He ran a finger over your lips. As if to confirm it was really you. He had to feel, had to know. Know that this was his fault. Your words echoed in his head. 

You’d never hurt me.

You goddamn liar. 

You were here for him. The reckoning for his sins these past weeks. 

“Matthew, who is she?” Margaret pressed again. 

“It doesn’t matter,” he snapped. “Just help her.” Matt’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Please.”

Sister Maggie frowned, fingers clenched around the cloth she’d used to clean some of the blood. “You need to take her to a hospital.”

“Don’t.” Your voice rasped between them. “Don’t you dare.” You started to sit up, using shaking arms to push yourself upright even as your insides felt like they wanted to rip out of you just from breathing. 

“Stay down,” Matt said. He sat on the edge of the bed, easing you back to a lying position. “Try not to move.”

“I knew it.” 

“Y/N-”

“I fucking knew it.” You pushed back. He was stronger. Matt kept you down as gently as he could. 

“Sister, will you give us a minute?”

You turned to the woman you hadn’t noticed. She seemed glad to leave. 

Matt didn’t face you. He stood up from the bed and paced along the concrete floor, keeping a distance away that made you want to scream. You wanted to touch him. To make sure he was really there. But he hovered away from you like a ghost. 

“Those guys really did a number, huh?” You managed to sit up and this time, he didn’t stop you. Your head, however, wanted to bash itself in. Between the trauma and the liquor, you weren’t sure which made you more nauseous. “But the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen is always around to save the day.”

“You did it on purpose,” Matt said, shoulders stiff. “You provoked them. They could have killed you and you-” He sucked in a breath. “Why?”

“I’m an adrenaline junkie. I drink, I look for trouble. It’s becoming quite the hobby.” You were lying. You knew he could tell. 

He stood still, head tilting slightly. “You knew I’d come.” 

“Ding ding ding.” You fell back on the bed and let the ceiling spin. 

Matt couldn’t speak. The panic he’d felt was slowly being engulfed by anger, though it was hard to tell at who. You were looking for a fight, that much he gathered was true. You were drunk, though the fight sobered you up some. Everything he’d ever told you, everything he’d done to try and keep you safe, would have been thrown away tonight. You would have let those men kill you if it meant he wasn’t there. 

And it was all his fault. 

He did the one thing he promised he wouldn't. He left. You’d never judged him, never questioned his need to put on the suit. All you ever asked was that he come back to you and this time, he didn’t. By choice, he didn’t. Just like everyone in both of your pasts, he abandoned you. This was your choice to get back at him, whether or not you believed he was alive. 

“I saw you,” you said quietly. “Today, at the hotel. I knew it was you.” The sure, stubbornness in your voice was gone, replaced by a cracking, wrenching sadness. “I had to know.” 

Matt didn’t say anything. He just reached for the lamp and switched off the light. 

“Get some rest.” 

When you woke up, you were in the hospital, bandages on your cuts, and more hungover than you’d felt in a long time. 

Matt was gone. 

-

They didn’t discharge you, but you left anyway. If they looked too closely at your emergency contacts, they’d find someone who was supposed to be dead and Karen. The latter was not someone you wanted to face right now. 

So, with a couple of busted ribs and one hell of a concussion, you went back to the apartment. His apartment. The place where he first kissed you, first touched you, first-

Now it was just yours. He didn’t want it anymore. 

You half debated going back to the church and demanding he talk to you. You’d like to see the brilliant lawyer try to talk his way out of this one. But in the end, everything hurt too much to face him. You wanted a drink. 

Unlocking the door, the click hit your chest harder than any of that creep’s kicks. 

You knew. 

You may not have had his abilities, but you knew. 

Walking in, you didn’t dare turn around and look at the stairs. You didn’t have to. 

“I’m all better now if that’s what you wanted to see,” you said. You threw your jacket on the floor and kicked off your boots. 

Matt didn’t move from his place by the roof entrance. He stood over you like a judgemental god and you wanted to hit him for it. You might have if he didn’t already look like hell itself spat him back out. 

“You wanted them to kill you,” he whispered just loud enough for you to hear. Not an accusation. An acknowledgment. 

“I wasn’t going to stop them if they tried.” You shrugged. You moved to the kitchen. “Beer?” 

“You shouldn’t drink with the amount of pain medication they gave you.” He said it so matter-of-factly. Like he was just your boyfriend and looking out for you. But he wasn’t and you didn’t know what he was to you anymore. 

“Yeah, well, it’s going to wear off at some point so I might as well get ahead of the curve here.” 

“Y/N-” He stepped. The steps creaked. 

“Don’t.” You held up a hand. “Don’t come anywhere near me, Matt Murdock.” 

He flinched at the sound of his name like it was a blade you held against his throat. 

“Stay where you are,” you said and twisted off the bottle top, grasping so hard the rigid edge dug into your palm. “Shit.” It sliced your skin and your blood dripped onto the wooden floor. 

You didn’t watch him descend the stairs or cross the space between you. You closed your eyes so you wouldn’t see his hand grab yours, wrapping the small but deep cut with gauze he carried with him. You yanked away the moment his hold lightened. 

“Don’t touch me.” 

“Y/N-” He said again, your name hurting more than his own. 

“You’re dead!” Your scream filled the apartment. You knew it filled his head. Everything always did. Good. Let it. 

Matt didn’t step away, but he did let his hand fall back to his side. 

“I know.” 

You tried your best not to shake, not to cry and show the weakness you’d felt for the last weeks. Then again, you wanted him to know. You wanted him to feel everything you’d felt. 

“Tell me you were trapped somewhere. Tell me you tried everything you could to get back to us and you just broke free,” you pleaded. “Tell me a lie, Matt, because I’d rather hear that than whatever bullshit reason you can give me.”

He opened his mouth, but you didn’t let him speak, reading his face before he could say it. 

“I swear, if you say something about ‘protecting me’, then you should have just left me to those creeps because that would have been better than listening to that broken record again.” You turned your back and for that second, you let yourself crumple, but only for a second and completely silent. 

“It wasn’t about you.” 

You straightened up again. “It never was.” 

Now, with you facing away, it was his turn to break. Matt sucked in a sharp breath to keep himself together as you continued. 

“It was always about you, Matt. About your insisted martyrdom.” You didn’t try to stop your tears now, tasting their salt as they flowed past your lips. “Your city. The rest of us just live here, right?” You turned around, stepping towards him. “But at least we live.” With your hands on his chest, you pushed him back. “Which is a hell of a lot harder than hiding.” 

You pushed again and again and again and he just stood there and took it. Your flattened hands turned to fists, hitting harder and harder until you were sure you’d leave bruises on his chest. 

It was when you collapsed that he finally moved, throwing his arms around you before you could hit the floor, your legs giving out under the weight of your utter, complete agony. Your sobs choked you and rattled through Matt like gunfire. You kept fighting him, even as he held you, the pain of your injuries was nothing compared to what you felt in your soul. Like the shattered pieces were being forced back together, but didn’t fit anymore. 

Matt wanted to make it stop. He wanted more than anything to take all of the pain away and tell you it was going to be okay. He was here now. But he was the cause of it all and there was nothing he could do to change it. 

And while there was still a dark part of him that wanted to leave you here, to shield you from him entirely, Matt knew if he tried to walk away now, he wouldn't survive it. Daredevil or Matt Murdock, it didn’t matter. He was yours. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered into your hair. 

“You were dead,” you said again, this time with broken words blending together with your sobs. “I tried to go back. I tried to get into Midland Circle, but they dragged me out. I tried, Matt, I-”

He cut you off with a kiss on the forehead and held you closer. 

“I know.” He could still hear your screams, your pleas to give up your life to try and save him. He’d thrown it away, everything you’d tried to make of him. Of the two of you, together. 

You’ll get her killed too. Fisk’s voice in his head pierced his skull like a blade. I will crush her. I’ll tear her apart piece by piece, Matthew, and there is nothing you can do to stop me. 

“She’ll put up a hell of a fight first,” Matt muttered. 

“What?” You pulled back to look up at him. 

He shook his head and held you closer still until the lines between you blurred together. 

“Nothing.” 

Even though every part of him now screamed to get away, he couldn’t move. Even as you knelt in front of him, pulling his lips down to yours, he didn’t fight it. A shock worse than any punch went through his system the moment you kissed him. Like every nerve was finally waking up. 

Maybe he wasn’t dead after all. 

Matt cupped your cheek with one hand and slipped the other to the small of your back, urging you to stand and walk with him to the bed neither of you had slept in in weeks. 

He’d decide in the morning.

[farfromstrange]

Is It Over Now? | Matt Murdock x Reader

Masterlist

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader ; (hinted) Frank Castle x Reader ; Elektra Natchios x Matt Murdock

Summary: Matt cheated on you, and you are trying to navigate through it.

Warnings: Angst, no happy ending, break-up, mention of cheating, song references (Taylor Swift), inspired by 'Is It Over Now?', (some) Matt "slander", (somewhat) suicidal thoughts, alcohol consumptions, hint at smut

Word Count: 1.7k

A/n: 1989 TV came out and I am losing my shit. Is It Over Now? Is my new favorite song and I just had a brain fart that made this. You can read this if you're a Swiftie and catch the references or just read it without listening to the song. It works either way.

It wasn’t supposed to end like this.

To be fair, there was a time when you thought it would never end. The thought of ever having a last kiss with him would have killed you back then. 

He told you that you were the love of his life. You believed him. He was yours, certainly. You can’t deny that.

You were happy, you laughed and cried together, and part of you figured that if you ever broke up, you would find a way to work through it somehow. 

Maybe in another universe, you are still together. Maybe in another universe, you two are still friends. Maybe in another universe, you never had to lose each other.

In this reality though—in this brutal, unforgivable reality—everything changed in a matter of a day. And there is nothing you can do about it now.

Your flower was withering in secret, and you didn’t realize what it was doing to you. Every time you woke up alone, every canceled date, every time he called you and told you he wouldn’t make it home tonight, it was sure to build up to this. 

But this, whatever the hell this is, it hurts beyond compare. 

He said you were a rose, but now that you look in the mirror, you only see a rotten mess.

The past few months have done this to you. He has done this to you. The paper airplanes crashed and burned. There is nothing left but pure bitterness and this hatred you have toward yourself and him; you just want to land your fist in his face, and then maybe your own because how could he hurt you like that after making you love him so very much? 

You loved him so much, but now you doubt he ever loved you back. 

Date after date, coffee after coffee, nights spent together on his couch and in his bed, sharing laughter, sharing tears, it all feels like a hoax now. 

You held him when he was unconscious, stitched him up and told him he was going to be okay. Where was he when you were bleeding out from your own battles? You wonder.

His smile used to be your safe haven, the epitome of innocence and strength, but now it only makes you angry. It makes you resent him. You shouldn’t, you really shouldn’t, but you still do.

So much has changed, and all it took was one day. 

One day. 

Three hundred days, all wasted in one. 

If you think about it, you spent almost an entire year attached to each other’s side. You moved in together. You kissed, you had sex, you shared secrets you wouldn’t have told anyone else. You helped him hide away from the world, from his enemies, made the world go quiet, and comforted him while he cried. You waited up, you worried, and you almost lost him more times than you can count, and you still stayed.

When no one else would take a chance on him, when he felt everyone was against him and going to leave him, you acted as his rock. You stayed.

You thought he was the one. 

And then it just… ended. 

You gave him the benefit of the doubt when you found her in his dress shirt on his leather couch. The very same couch you two often shared passionate nights on, but at the same time it used to be a symbol of so much more than that.

You let him explain. He explained that she got seriously hurt after showing up out of nowhere, and he just wanted to help without putting you at risk. You believed him because that is the kind of man he was in your head. He was going through some things, things you couldn’t possibly understand, and she was the connection. You tried to understand. In the process of understanding him though, you lost yourself. 

That is something you will never forgive him for. Making you care, making you love him, and unintentionally making you give up on yourself while he continued to break your heart.

You never wanted this to end, never wanted him to go, but in the end, it was the only way. Sticking around wasn’t an option anymore, you have to remind yourself.

He did the one thing he promised he would never do. He broke your heart and your trust into a million pieces that you are now left to pick up on your own. 

You didn’t want to see it before. You were too in love to open your eyes.

He wouldn’t do such a thing, right? You remember repeating that to yourself, to your friends, to Foggy and Karen, but Karen saw him with her, too, and she gave you little hope.

Still, you believed in him. You believed in his morale and his faith. You had faith in him, not even in God but in him and the man he pretended to be—and somehow, he still picked up the knife when you weren’t looking and buried it in your back. 

There were so many signs, but you were blind. So many flashing lights. Red flags. Screaming voices in the back of your head begging you to think. You were in a forest full of trees, yet you saw nothing.

When you came home to find his lips on hers, that’s when you knew. Too little, too late.

He called your name. He told you, “This isn’t what it looks like!” But you lost count of the times he used the same line in relation to her.

To anything, really. He always knew how to talk his way out of something when you were together, although back then, it was mostly harmless.

“I trusted you,” you remember saying. You couldn’t even cry. “And you turned right back around and fucked her!”

“It was just a kiss,” he argued. 

“Are you sure about that? ‘Cause if I ask Elektra, I’m sure she will tell me the truth.”

“No,” Matt was adamant because he could hear your heart breaking.

The way you spoke to him was so eerily quiet. That was how he knew he lost you, and he tried to fix it with nothing but his hands. 

But that is not how you fix a broken vase. That’s how you make it worse and hurt yourself in the process.

You remember him opening his mouth, having the audacity to apologize. “I’m sorry,” he said. 

“No. Fuck you, Matt!”

You tore the necklace with his initial off your neck and tossed it at his feet. You couldn’t even look at it. You wonder what happened to it after he picked it up. 

“I trusted you. I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I was there when no one else was, and this is how you repay me?” you said.

You should have never let him fool you.

At least you had the decency to keep your lonely nights to yourself.

“Sweetheart, please,” Matt tried to beg again. 

You wouldn’t let him. Thank God you were strong enough to withstand the tears in his eyes. 

“You’re a fucking traitor, Matthew Murdock,” was one of the last things you said to him. “I wish we’d never met.”

Three hundred days. You fell in love. You finally knew what love felt like, and then…then he turned around and fucked it all up. 

“We’re done.”

Some days, you still regret it, but if it was so easy for him to toss all this time together down the drain, he probably wasn’t worth it. 

But God, you were so in love. 

Sweet nothings whispered in your ear are gone now. You’re all alone in your bed. No one to cuddle, no one to touch. It has been a while since you heard someone say, “I love you,” and mean it. You felt loved until you didn’t. Until the life he led ate him up. 

Instead of talking, instead of fighting with you, he drove you into a tree. A car that didn’t need sight, and still he crashed. It was winter then, the snow painted red by the blood of your broken heart. Your favorite dress torn up as you tried to escape. He reached for you the same way you reached for him, but you weren’t there. And he wasn’t there when you needed him most.

Part of you feels bad. You could have worked through this if he hadn’t kissed her. Or maybe you wouldn’t have. In the end, it killed you. It killed him. 

You killed each other. 

Though there are still days when you think about jumping off of very high somethings just to get his attention. Just for him to see you. To come to rescue you. It is a hurtful and selfish thought. Yet, you can’t help it. 

He was your first true love. 

Your mind keeps repeating the same sentence: It wasn’t supposed to end like this. 

“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me,” he told you once. 

He searched for something greater in the bed of someone he loved before. You weren’t his first love. You should have known he would say that and not mean it.

But when exactly did you go wrong?

Was it over when he stopped coming home at night? Was it over when he forgot your anniversary? Was it over when he canceled your birthday dinner? Or was it over when he shoved his throat down his ex-girlfriend’s throat in front of you and acted as if it didn’t matter? Was it over then?

“Another one for the lady,” a voice pipes up beside you. 

Your empty glass of tequila disappears, now replaced by a full one. In your drunken haze, you see a head of brown hair, and his smirk makes you wonder if there’s more to him than he lets on. 

“Thank you,” you murmur, tipping your glass to the stranger. 

“Nah, don’t thank me.” He sits down next to you. “You look miserable.”

“What if I am?”

“I’d tell you I know the feeling.”

You huff but offer the stranger your hand with a mention of your name.

He smiles. Your name rolls off his tongue effortlessly. “Frank,” he introduces himself in return. “Castle.”

“Nice to meet you,” you say. 

Broken people make bad decisions, but whether it was over when he took her right there on his couch, or it was over when you told him it was doesn’t matter. 

It is over now, and all you want to do is forget. 

You need to forget Matt Murdock. 

And if this stranger called Frank needs to unbutton your blouse to help you do so, you will gladly follow him home. 

Matt Murdock Tag List: @acharliecoxedfan @gpenguin666 @linamarr @itwasthereaminuteago @mattkinsella @norestfortheshelbywicked @yarrystyleeza @littlenerdyravenclaw @thychuvaluswife @schneeflocky @imjustcal @pipsqueakkitten @merlinbtch @ravenclaw617

(also, I keep tagging you in stuff, but I also think you might like this @blackshadowswriter)

[writingdumpster]

first impressions

pairing: Matt Murdock x reader (no pronouns used)

warnings: none I think

summary: i wrote this purely bc i know matt murdock is excellent at meeting people’s mothers. after impressing your parents matt gets to thinking about his future.

word count: 1.6k

“I’m nervous.” You sat next to Matt in the restaurant he had chosen for the evening. It was fancy. There was a pianist in one corner of the room and linen tablecloths. It was nicer than the hole-in-the-wall joints that you and Matt usually preferred. He wanted to impress your parents though, so he had made a reservation at a swanky restaurant in midtown Manhattan. 

Matt was in his court suit and you had donned the blue silk dress he bought for your anniversary. It was by far your favorite dress. Beyond being a treasured gift, it fit you perfectly and the fabric always felt soft against your skin. Karen had helped Matt pick it out, but she had told you that all she did was describe the dresses and that he had completely ignored her opinions. She had strongly recommended a yellow dress but he had refused her suggestions, insisting you would like the one he picked better. Never having seen the yellow one, you knew he was right. If he picked it, you loved it. You would have him choose between options you put out when you got dressed in the mornings by describing them to him and he always had you match his tie to the rest of his outfit. 

“It’s going to be fine,” Matt said and kissed your temple. 

“I only ever introduced Caleb to my parents,” you told him, not that you hadn’t said it before. Matt knew that Caleb was not someone you had pleasant memories of. He had heard the stories from you and he was the one who helped you get over many of the fears that Caleb had struck into you. Matt was remembering those stories while he heard in your heartbeat how nervous you were. 

“You know I’m not like Caleb,” Matt reminded you. 

“I know, Matt. I just…this is a big deal for me,” you said. 

“It’s a big deal for me too, sweetheart,” Matt told you. “It’s just an exciting big deal for me.” You inhaled deeply. Matt smiled. “You have nothing to worry about. Moms always like me, angel. It’ll be great,” he assured you. 

“All women like you,” you said. Matt laughed lightly. 

“Then that will include your mom, won’t it?” He asked rhetorically. He gave you a light peck as he tangled his fingers with yours beneath the table. “Don’t worry, sweetheart,” he cooed. You sighed. 

“You’re right. I know they’re going to love you. I just…” You hesitated. 

“Caleb was a mistake and you think it’s bad luck,” Matt said, always knowing what you were thinking. 

“Yeah,” you agreed. 

“This isn’t a mistake, sweetheart. I promise. It’s just the next step,” he told you. You nodded and Matt gave your hand a squeeze. You looked up at the doorway to the restaurant. 

“They’re here,” you said. You rose from the table and greeted your mom and dad with hugs. Matt was standing by your side with a charming smile across his face. 

“Hello, Mrs. y/l/n,” Matt greeted with a smile. Your mom held her arms out to Matt and pulled him into a hug. He returned it kindly.  

“Oh, please, call me y/m/n,” your mom said. “Y/N has told us so much about you. I think we can be on a first name basis,” your mom said. You felt heat rise to your cheeks as your mom told Matt how you spoke about him. Matt simply turned to you and smiled. He loved that you told your parents about him. He wished he could tell his dad all about you. Your father held out his hand for Matt to shake. Matt stayed still, not wanting to give up his powers. You took Matt’s hand and pulled it to where your father’s hand was waiting. 

“Oh, sorry about that,” your dad said in embarrassment as he shook Matt’s hand. Matt chuckled lightly. 

“That’s alright, sir. Took y/n months to stop answering me with nods,” Matt joked. 

“It was not months,” you said sharply. 

“You still do it sometimes,” Matt teased. You pursed your lips, biting back the comment about how you knew he could tell. The four of you sat down, Matt pulling out your mother’s chair for her before doing the same for you and taking his seat.

Matt was right about mothers loving him. He charmed your mom with his dry sense of humor and enchanting smile. He won your dad’s approval when he mentioned he owned his own law firm. Your father didn’t need to know that Nelson and Murdock was nearly always on the edge of bankruptcy. Your parents told Matt stories about you from your childhood, despite your protests that they were too embarrassing. Matt loved the stories. All he could do was smile at you. The night was perfect. Matt was perfect. Your father refused Matt’s attempt to pay for the meal before the four of you left. You said your goodbyes in front of the restaurant before getting into different cabs and going back home. Matt’s hand was resting innocently on your leg while the two of you sat in the back of the cab. 

“I told you it was going to be fine,” Matt teased you. You rolled your eyes. 

“Yes, you were right, Murdock,” you agreed. Matt chuckled. 

“Doesn’t happen that often. I have to brag when it does,” he said. The cab pulled up outside of your apartment and the two of you got out. You made your way up the stairs and walked through the sliding door. The glow of the billboard outside of your window was blue. A new advertiser had taken over a few weeks earlier and the red light that usually filled the room had been replaced with a blue light, making it seem like your apartment was bathed in moonlight. You were looking through the mail that you had collected on your way up. 

You realized you didn’t know where Matt went when music started playing. You smiled to yourself as you tossed away the junk mail. Suddenly you felt hands on your hips as Matt pulled you away from the counter. He spun you around and moved one of his hands to the small of your back. The other went to cup your hand in his. You giggled before moving to wrap your free arm around his shoulders, fingers tangling in the hairs at the nape of his neck as the two of you began swaying back and forth. Matt loosened his hold on your waist and moved to let you spin beneath his arm before pulling you back into his body and dipping you. 

When Matt pulled you back upright you leaned up on your toes to press a kiss to his lips. Matt smiled against your lips. You stared into his eyes when you leaned away. His eyes were so beautiful. You never cared that his eyes didn’t see you the way yours saw him. He saw you in so many other ways. 

“You really impressed them,” you said as you leaned closer to Matt, tucking your head against his neck.

“I told you moms like me,” Matt said. 

“My dad liked you too though,” you said. 

“Yeah,” Matt agreed. “We just can’t let him visit my office. He won’t be impressed anymore.” You chuckled. 

“I certainly hope he won’t ever need a lawyer,” you said. 

“If you hadn’t needed a lawyer we never would have met,” Matt reminded you. 

“Yes, and that worked out very well,” you agreed. “But when we tell our kids how we met I think we should make something up.” Matt beamed. 

“Our kids?” He asked. Your heart dropped for a moment and your face went blank. 

“I mean, umm…” You started stuttering. 

“We’ll have to get married first,” Matt interjected before you could start backpedaling. Your panic turned to excitement. You grinned. 

“You obviously have my parents' approval now,” you said. Matt smiled. 

“And you’ve certainly gotten Foggy’s approval,” Matt replied. 

“Foggy likes me better than you,” you said with a laugh. 

“Yes, I know,” Matt said flatly. “He’s very clear about that.” You held back your giggles. 

“If you came into the office with cookies instead of bruises like me he might like you more,” you joked.

“I do bring in cookies,” he grumbled. 

“Yes, but Foggy knows I made them,” you said. Matt sighed. 

“He wouldn’t like me at all if I brought in cookies that I made,” he said. You giggled at the memory of Matt trying to make your birthday cake and causing the building to evacuate after setting off the smoke alarm. 

“When we have kids I bet he’ll like them better than both of us,” you said. Matt smiled. 

“That’s alright. We can use him as a babysitter that way,” he said. 

“Maybe if Karen’s there too,” you said. Matt chuckled. 

“You don’t trust Foggy with our kids?” He asked. 

“Matty, you have told me far too many stories about you dragging Foggy back to your dorm after a frat party for me to trust Foggy with our kids,” you said. “He will most certainly let one of them do something stupid.” 

“And you think I won’t?” Matt asked. 

“You won’t let them do something stupid, you’ll do it for them,” you said. Matt spun you around in his arms once more as the song came to an end. He kissed your forehead when he pulled you back against him.  Matt’s heart was full at the way the two of you were so casually talking about your kids. He hoped it wouldn’t be long till they were real. He knew what he wanted. He didn’t want to wait for it anymore. There wasn’t anything stopping him now.

“You want to go ring shopping tomorrow?”

[totallynotashieldagent]

full of catholic guilt matt murdock is just SO chef's kiss tho

sex would be pleasure and punishment all wrapped into one

like, he would need- he'd beg, plead, want to be tied up, overstimulated because he doesn't think he deserves anything better than this- this extreme pleasure accompanied with this extreme sensitivity of pain and sharpness of your foot on his balls as his hands are tied to his thighs, and his ankles are tied to the legs of the sofa or a chair or whatever- and he's there, exposed- and you put earplugs in his ears to dampen his senses but he can taste it

he can taste the salt of his own skin, the sex in the air-

and your hands are working him still, his cum is half dry, half lubing him up more, and making him go again and again and again-

he's begging, moaning, whimpering-

and he's cum so many times now that his cock is just twitching and swollen but nothing's coming out anymore

or

there would be days when he's overtaken by control. he's a predator and you have better said your prayers that day because one miscalculation, one wrong word and the way his hand would land on your ass would leave a mark for days-

he'd hold your legs open by the ankles, rut into your tight cunt without prep and cum until you're a sobbing mess and keep going until you're begging him to let you go because you can taste his release in the back of your throat now -

your pussy's already gone numb so there's no use in fighting over that, honestly

but it's the after

the after is when the real catholic guilt hits

when all the pleasure he's felt, feels so completely disgusting and he's full of self-loathing to have enjoyed any of it at all

to have cum so much that he's spent-

to have made you cum at all that you're boneless and drooling and your body is marked and bruised in prints of his hand on your ass

he'd beg for forgiveness as if you were his alter and church, he'd stay on his knees for you, whispering apologies for going too far, for not making love, for fucking too hard, for even daring to touch you in such an obscene way-

he would stay on his knees and you'd run your fingers through his hair, repeating it was fine, it's okay, it hurt but you never said the safeword anyway so he shouldn't feel bad about it

but he can't- he can't stop the guilt

he can't stop throwing himself into being Daredevil and getting himself hit harder and punished more but then that's how the cycle repeats

he gets hurt and you take care of him, and the only way he wants to be taken care of is through pleasure anyway-

Drabble Master List.

[aquaholicsanonymousworld]

Unfinished Business

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Summary: She and Matt Murdock have been caught in an on-again, off-again relationship, with Matt constantly pushing her away yet never fully letting go. When Nelson & Murdock’s new secretary, Karen Page, arrives, she tries to be mature about Matt’s growing closeness with her—until she repeatedly walks in on them sharing quiet, intimate moments. Though jealousy bubbles beneath the surface, she refuses to be the bitter ex.

Inspired by: My own jealousy of early Matt x Karen scenes. Much more of a Matt x Elektra girl myself.

The first time it happened, she told herself it was nothing.

Karen had just started at Nelson & Murdock, bright-eyed and eager, and Matt had always been charming—it wasn’t a crime to be charming. She had sat across from them at Josie’s, watching Karen teach Matt how to play pool, and convinced herself that the twist in her stomach was just indigestion.

The second time, it was at the office. Karen had been adjusting Matt’s tie, her fingers lingering just a second too long, and Matt had smirked in that way that used to be reserved for her. She had looked away, hands clenched, reminding herself that they weren’t together right now. Matt had made that perfectly clear.

The third time, she walked into the firm late at night to find them whispering in hushed voices, Matt leaning in close, Karen biting her lip in hesitation.

That was the moment she almost lost it.

But she didn’t. Because Karen wasn’t the enemy.

She reminded herself of that when they ended up on assignment together—something Matt was too busy to handle, so she and Karen took it on instead. It was supposed to be routine: gather information, ask the right questions, get the job done. But then a recently fired nurse gave them what was supposed to be Frank Castle’s home address, and their night got interesting.

The apartment was abandoned but filled with remnants of a life violently torn apart—family photos covered in dust, children’s drawings pinned to the fridge like ghosts clinging to the past.

That’s when Karen spoke, voice quiet in the heavy silence.

“He does this, you know,” she muttered, running her fingers along a bullet-ridden wall.

For a second, she thought Karen meant the Punisher.

But then Karen looked at her, gaze searching. “He makes you feel like you’re the only person in the world… until he doesn’t. Until he pulls away like it never meant anything at all.”

Something inside her cracked.

Because that was the problem. Not Karen. Not the lingering glances or the shared laughter. It was him.

It had always been him.

She found him at his apartment that night.

Matt opened the door, looking like he was about to head out—suit half-buttoned, tie loose, as if he had been expecting someone else.

“Going somewhere?” she asked, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation.

He tilted his head slightly, listening. “You’re angry.”

She let out a sharp, humorless laugh. “Yeah, Matt. I am angry.”

She turned to face him, heart pounding. “Tell me—what was the plan? Keep me close, but not too close? Push me away when it suits you, but never far enough that I actually leave? Or was it just fun for you, watching me walk in on you and Karen over and over again like some kind of sick test?”

Matt’s brows knit together. “Karen and I—”

She cut him off. “Karen and you nothing, right? Because you don’t let anyone have all of you, do you?” She stepped closer, forcing him to feel the heat of her words. “You get just close enough to make sure I’m still watching, then you disappear. You push and pull until I don’t even know where I stand with you. And I let you.” Her voice broke, but she pushed forward. “I let you every damn time.”

Silence.

Matt’s jaw was tight, his hands curled into fists at his sides. But he didn’t deny it.

Didn’t fight her on it.

Finally, after a long pause, he exhaled sharply. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

She shook her head, laughing bitterly. “That’s the thing, Matt. You do. You hurt me, over and over again, and you act like you don’t see it.”

He took a step forward, just close enough for her to catch the subtle tilt of his head, like he was listening to the way her breathing had changed.

“You’re right,” he admitted quietly. “I push you away. Because if I don’t…” He swallowed hard. “If I don’t, I’ll never stop.”

Her breath hitched.

He reached out then, his fingers grazing the side of her face, tracing over a bruise she hadn’t even noticed forming from earlier. His touch was careful, reverent, like he was memorizing her all over again.

“I want you,” he murmured, voice rough. “I’ve always wanted you. And that scares the hell out of me.”

Her eyes burned, but she refused to look away. “Then prove it. Stop running. Stop treating me like I’m something you can pick up and put down when it’s convenient.”

The space between them vanished.

His hands cupped her face, and then his lips crashed into hers—desperate, consuming, a kiss that tasted like every moment they had lost and every one they had stolen.

She kissed him back just as fiercely, fingers threading through his hair, pulling him closer like she could fuse them together, like she could keep him from slipping away this time.

Matt groaned against her mouth, hands roaming like he was trying to convince himself she was real. Like he was scared she would disappear if he let go.

They broke apart, breathing hard, foreheads pressed together.

“I’m not letting you go again,” he promised.

She nodded, voice thick with emotion. “Good.”

Because this time, if he did, she wasn’t waiting for him to come back.

Instead, she would make him understand—her devotion wasn’t a leash, it was an offering. She had always been his, not because he demanded it, but because she had chosen him. Over and over again.

And this time, she needed him to choose her back.

[marrziy]

TENHO FOME.

[l0vergirlwrites]

no pressure ; matthew murdock

warnings: mentions of sex, anxiety, few swear words, suggestiveness, comfort!matt

matthew & you as a couple was sill fairly new.

he hasn’t been in a serious relationship since electra, & you have never been in one either. so, you both had a lot to catch up & learn. besides learning each other’s love languages, favourite foods, hygiene habits, etc, you both still struggle with communication at times—especially when it comes to going to the next level in your relationship: intimacy.

for matthew, he’s had his fair share of intimate nights with partners, but you—you have never gone that far yet. & by knowing matthew’s history, you felt embarrassed & discouraged in telling him your inexperience with intimacy.

you tried avoiding the conversation for as long as you could, just telling matthew that you wanted to “take things slow & easy” for a while. & it did work… but only for five months.

it all started when matthew pulled you into a kiss after some lawyer ball the firm was invited to attend. the whole group, consisting of foggy, karen, matthew, & yourself had dressed up in your best attire to enjoy an evening of cocktails, expensive appetizers, & networking connections.

the whole night was a success, but matthew couldn’t help but feel his mind race at the thought of the way you felt tonight.

your perfume

your dress

your touch

he wasn’t sure why, but he couldn’t help but feel like he needed to show you how you made him feel… in other ways.

so when you both arrived to his apartment after deciding you’d spend the night at his, matthew tapped your chin & held your cheek, pulling you into a long kiss. your clutch fell out of your hand & thumped onto the ground as your hands held onto the lapels of his suit jacket.

“you,” kiss “were” kiss “amazing tonight” matthew mumbled as he continued to kiss your lips, eventually leading you to smile, teeth clashing against his own for a moment.

“shouldn’t i be saying that to you, mr. murdock? those other lawyers thought you were the shit” your compliment made matthew laugh into your neck as he peppered kisses along your skin, his hands running down towards your thighs as you leaned against his wall.

“say mr. murdock again & see where that’ll get you, won’t ya?” he teased, only to kiss your lips again when you repeated it, turning your giggles into heavy breaths.

soon enough, you were making out on the couch—hands holding whatever they could. yours were in matthew’s messy hair while his were on your ass, firmly holding you in place as you straddled his slack covered lap.

each kiss, each breath, each touch—you could feel yourself getting lost in the feeling of bliss, & you knew matthew was feeling it too. it wasn’t until a kiss on your neck made you bite back a small moan, & make you grow quiet & stiff in matthew’s grip.

he could smell your arousal building throughout the last while on the couch, but the tension bubbling on your skin made him pull away from your neck & raise his hands to your waist. “what’s wrong? did i-i do something? do you want to stop?” he asked carefully, his concern dripped with nothing but love.

but you thought the worst of it.

staying still in his lap, you felt your mouth grow dry. “n-no it wasn’t you, i just uh… fuck. i don’t know how to say it” you rushed, running your hands over your warm face in embarrassment.

with an end outing rub on your waist, matthew tutted. “sweetheart, you can tell me. i’m a big boy, i can handle it” he assured, sensing you peeking through your fingers before they dropped to your lap.

silence over took you for a moment as you fidgeted your fingers, hearing matthew let out a nervous breath.

“i’ve never had sex” you blurted, awkwardness rising in your chest at saying your fear out loud. “& i’m scared you won’t want me… it’s stupid i know—“

“it is stupid” matthew cut you off, shaking his head a little when he took one of your nervous hands into his.

“how could i not want you because of that?” matthew genuinely asked, not sure of where this idea of yours came from.

he knew it possibly stemmed from insecurity, but he needed you to say it.

shrugging your shoulders, you felt yourself caving into your body. “i never dated anyone…never hooked up… never had a boyfriend… no one has ever wanted me until now” you trailed on, your lips in the shape of a frown at hearing your loneliness be spoken about out loud.

matthew’s lips also frowned at the sound of your heartbeat slowing in a sad tempo, so he pulled you closer to his chest in a hug. you hid your face in his neck, eyes shut & breathing slow as you tried to relax. his hands worked their way along your back until one hand cradled the back of your head.

“i don’t care that you’ve never had sex before. that isn’t a deal breaker for me. never has been, never will be. okay? i’ll always want you y/n…” he told you firmly, trying his hardest to make you understand that you could trust him, be vulnerable to him without shame.

he felt your nod your head before a sigh slipped your lips. “i-i want you to be my first, i really do. i just don’t know when i’ll be fully ready” you confessed, hoping that he wouldn’t be questioning if he did something wrong.

“& that’s okay. i can wait for you, y/n. wanna treat you good when you want it, yeah?” he kissed your head once he felt the tension in your shoulders subside & you held onto him tighter.

“thank you” you pressed a kiss to his neck, your nose soon rubbing over the spot tenderly.

“no,” he paused, bringing your face to be in front of his. “thank you”

with your anxiousness dissipating in the air, you kissed the palm of matthew’s hand. “lemme treat you to a shower hmm? with the fancy body wash?” he suggested, just wanting to be close to you in a way that you both have done on multiple occasions—it was his way of showing you that things were good.

leaning into his touch, you couldn’t help but smile & feel warm. you felt lucky that he was so understanding.

“yeah, i’d like that”

[amhrosina]

Afterglow (Matt Murdock x Reader)

Masterlist // Join My Taglist

a/n: another taylor swift song fic lmfao i just cannot help myself, this one is so angsty i almost felt bad for Matt just writing it (someone pls give that man a hug, he NEEDS one) also i feel so bad about not posting that i didnt even send this one to my beta reader i just posted it and hoped for the best lmfao

Summary: Matt and Reader have an argument that feels like it might be relationship-ending after Matt's hectic lifestyle as Daredevil catches up with him.

warnings: ANGST BRO SO MUCH ANGST, matty really just deserves the world, angry matt at the beginning, soft matt and foggy convo, matt doesn't know how to accept love, super soft matt at the end, some religious imagery i guess, happy ending

-

I blew things out of proportion, now you're blue

Put you in jail for something you didn’t do

I pinned your hands behind your back, oh

Thought I had reason to attack, but no

Fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves

Chemistry 'til it blows up, 'til there’s no us

Why'd I have to break what I love so much?

It's on your face, and I'm to blame, I need to say

The door slammed behind Matt in a fitful rage, and he was so pissed off, so intense in his anger that he wanted to turn around and slam it again, just to lash out a second time. It was so unlike him to be this way, so unlike him to allow the festering wound that was his soul show itself so plainly, but it had been a long night, long year, long life and he was fucking tired.

And you. You. You. You. You’d been caught in the crossfire. 

“Fuck.” Matt breathed, already regretting the argument that he’d started simply because he hadn’t been able to reel the Devil back in after a long night. The tight leash he held on the part of him that he hated, the part of him that you’d never seen because he’d hidden it so deep inside himself every night, was a ghost in his hands. The line between Matthew the person and Daredevil the vigilante had been blurring for months, but tonight was the first time he’d let it slip through the careful facade he’d been constructing around himself. He was a shattered window, ready to break at the slightest bit of pressure. 

The cold sliced into Matt’s skin as he stepped through the doorway at the front of his building, a sobering chill of wind that triggered the memory of your eyes welling with tears. He’d been relentless in his anger, and what for? Because he had a bad night? Because he couldn’t save everyone, and somehow that was your fault? 

Asshole is the word you’re looking for, Matthew.

Matt groaned and pulled his phone out of his pocket, dialing Foggy’s number before he could talk himself out of it.

“It’s three in the morning, Matt.” Foggy said by way of greeting, voice still heavy with sleep. “You’re not somewhere dying are you?”

“Only metaphorically.” Matt replied, shuffling his feet. He lowered himself to sit on the stairs beneath him, huffing as his body settled against the concrete. The metal of the railing dug into his temple as he rested his head against it, an uncomfortable reminder that the only person to blame for this was himself.

“You okay?” Foggy’s tone had shifted from a sleepy annoyance to somewhat concerned. 

Matt closed his eyes. He didn’t deserve the love he received from his friends.

“I’m-” He started, but cut himself off when he realized he had no idea what he was going to say. Was he okay? No, he didn’t think so. 

“You’re kinda freaking me out here, man.”

“I fucked up, Foggy.” He deflated as he admitted it.

“With her?” Foggy pressed.

“With her. With everything.” Matt shrugged, blinking away the tears burning the back of his eyes. Your sudden return to his thoughts felt like whiplash, and he couldn’t catch his breath. “She deserves better than me.”

“Matt,” Foggy chided, and Matt could tell he was shaking his head, “Don’t say that. She loves you.” 

“Maybe not anymore.” Matt knew how ridiculous and juvenile he sounded, but the Matthew-Murdock-party-of-one pity party was in full effect, and he was leaning into the sad corner of his being so aggressively he couldn’t stop himself from saying it.

“She loves you.” Foggy repeated. “I don’t think anything could change that. What happened?”

“I had a bad night and yelled at her. It was stupid and I feel like an ass-”

“An asshole.” Foggy finished, and Matt couldn’t stop the chuckle that followed this observation. “Listen, did you tell her any of this?”

“Not yet.” The longer Matt sat, the more he hated himself for leaving. The words he had shouted echoed in his mind. “She should just leave. I’m never going to be able to give her what she deserves.”

“What about what you deserve, Matt?” Foggy asked, heated in the defense of his very best friend, “You deserve to be loved, too.”

Matt sat with Foggy’s statement for a second, letting the love wash over him for the briefest moment. Is this what it’s like for the kind of people who can easily accept the love of others? His body felt warm and fuzzy, an unfamiliar but comforting sensation that had him rubbing the heel of his hand across his chest.

“I should go apologize and hope to God she’ll take me back.” Matt sighed.

“She will, Matt.” Foggy assured him. “She will.”

Matt returned the phone to his pocket and turned, heading back into the place that held his entire aching heart.

It's so excruciating to see you low

Just wanna lift you up and not let you go

This ultraviolet morning light below

Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh

I lived like an island, punished you with silence

Went off like sirens, just crying

Why'd I have to break what I love so much?

It’s on your face, don't walk away, I need to say

Hey, it's all me, in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

But it's not what I meant

Sorry that I hurt you

When Matt reentered the apartment, it had only been twenty minutes since he’d stormed out, but it had felt like hours. You were in the same place that he’d left you - curled up in a sitting position on the sofa - except now your cheeks were coated with salty tears that permeated the air around you. Matt tasted them on his tongue the second he opened the door, a twinge of pain shooting through his chest as he realized just how bad the situation was. You were so deep in thought, cycling through the words Matt had spat at you, that you hadn’t noticed his arrival.

“Petal?” Matt called softly, alerting you to his presence in the room. You startled, turning to look in his direction. The silence before you responded was deafening and anxiety inducing, something Matt had never handled well. He wrung his hands together and took a step closer to you. Finally, you spoke.

“You came back.”

Not a question, but not really a statement either. A simple observation that left Matt stumbling over his words. 

“I uh…never really left. I was just downstairs.” He scratched the back of his neck. “On the steps out front. I didn’t go far.”

“I thought you weren’t coming back.”

Matt’s lip wobbled as he inhaled sharply and asked, “Do you want me to go?”

He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer to that question. He listened to your answer anyway. He would listen to any words you had to offer, even if they were words that might kill him.

“You said some terrible things, Matt.” You sniffled, sighing heavily as another wave of tears coated your cheeks. “You said ‘If you can’t handle this, I don’t think we should be together anymore.’ And the funny thing is, I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be handling.”

“Petal, I-” Matt began, shaking his head.

“No, Matt.” Your voice had suddenly become very firm and very loud, all at once. Matt flinched. “I’m not finished.” You adjusted your body, leaning your head back against the sofa before continuing. “I don’t know who you are anymore. My Matty would never keep things from me or disappear for days at a time or yell at me. The man I fell in love with is missing, and I don’t know what to do to get him back.”

The hold Matt had on his tears was obliterated as you admitted your feelings to him. Warm tears fell down his face, every droplet an admission of guilt. You were right, of course. Matt hadn’t felt like himself in months, and instead of trying to get a grip on himself, he had been leaning into the suit every night, forcing his mind to focus on other things. He always took on the brunt of the pain in any situation - he’d been doing this his entire life - but he had not realized how much of that pain was being transferred to you every time he forgot himself.

“Baby, I’m- I can’t even say how sorry I am.” Matt sank to his knees in front of you, pleading. “You’re right about everything, and I’m sorry. I’m sorry I can’t be good enough for you or come home to you after work like a normal boyfriend would and I’m sorry for the things I said. I never wanted to hurt you the way I did. I will never, ever, deserve your love.” He swallowed a sob as he admitted what he thought was the truest thing he’d ever said out loud. “Foggy told me I deserve love but I’ve thought and thought about it and I can’t imagine a world where your love will ever feel like anything but a gift to me.”

You sighed again, sniffling as you lifted your hand to cradle Matt’s wet cheek.

“I know I’m fucking it up. I’m sorry I can’t be more. This is all I have to offer, and I know it’s selfish to ask you to keep loving me but I can’t be without you. You’re all I have.”

“I don’t understand, Matty.” You shook your head, furrowing your brows.

“You’re the only thing that brings me home. And I don’t mean physically. You’re the only reason I can find my way back to myself. You remind me of the love the world is capable of. Not even Foggy can do that for me the way that you do. Can’t you see that you’re it for me? Without you, I am just a man walking hand in hand with the Devil. There is no point without you.”

“Matty.” You sighed, caressing his cheekbones as tears cascaded down his face. 

Matt wasn’t sure what he wanted you to say. That he did deserve love, or maybe that you weren’t going to leave him after tonight was over, or maybe anything besides ‘I don’t love you anymore’. 

“Don’t leave me.” He begged, barely above a whisper, so tired of the war raging in his mind. If there was anything he was capable of doing tonight, it was pleading with you for this. Beyond that, he was useless. “Don’t leave.”

“Will you lay with me?” You asked, and Matt nearly collapsed into your hold. It was not what he was expecting, but he would take it. The inevitable self-hatred and doubt about this moment echoed in the back of his mind, but he was ignoring it for once. All he wanted to do was lay with you, so that’s exactly what he did.

Tell me that you're still mine

Tell me that we'll be just fine

Even when I lose my mind

I need to say

Tell me that it's not my fault

Tell me that I'm all you want

Even when I break your heart

I need to say

I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you (Ooh)

I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you (Ooh)

I need to say, hey, it's all me, just don't go

Meet me in the afterglow

Matt was on the verge of tears again, lying next to you in the bed that you had shared with each other for so many nights. He was so afraid of losing this, losing you. He wasn’t entirely sure he would survive if you asked him to leave after this. He wasn’t entirely sure that mindset was healthy, either, but that didn’t stop him from contemplating it. He was here, and you were here, and if he was destined to live in this doubt forever, then at least he would die next to you.

Your tears had long dried up, but the ache deep inside you was palpable and overwhelming and he didn’t know what to do. The hand you had led him here with, the one that you still held, the only thing connecting your body to his was his safety blanket. This was what people called a safe space, he thought. For the first time in a long time, Matt began to silently pray.

He prayed for you, and he prayed for himself, and mostly, he prayed for love. He prayed that the night would last forever, so that he could lay next to you for the remainder of his life. He prayed for forgiveness, and begged for yours. He prayed for the strength it would take if you didn’t grant it to him. Because if you asked him to leave, he would. It would hurt and possibly - no, definitely - kill him, but he’d do it, because you deserved that, at least. The possibilities of the night were endless, and that was the scariest thing to Matt. Anything could happen.

“What are you thinking about?” You asked, lightly squeezing his hand.

“I’m praying.” He murmured, squeezing your hand back.

“About what?”

“About you.” 

“Oh, Matty.” 

The smile on your face, the steady thump of your elevated heart rate, felt like a win. Comfortable silence overtook the room, and you were so still for so long that anyone else might’ve thought you had fallen asleep, but Matt knew better. You were thinking, contemplating every word that had been shouted, pleaded, and begged tonight. All the while, Matt prepared himself for the worst.

“The sun’s coming up.” You murmured.

“Yeah?” It was all he could muster. Everything hurt, and he never wanted this moment to end.

“Yeah.” You swept your fingertips over his cheeks, following the path of the sun as it draped itself across both of your bodies. 

Matt swallowed, opened his mouth to ask the dreaded question, and then closed it and swallowed again. The gentle caress of your fingers felt like a brand in his skin. Finally, in a thick voice he asked for the second time in a matter of hours, “Do you want me to go?”

“Oh, Matty.” You whispered, tears welling in your eyes, and Matt’s heart sank into the ground below him. He thought he could do this, but he couldn’t. He was just supposed to leave what you had built with him? After everything, he was just supposed to count his losses and move on? No fucking way. His breathing had picked up, and he was so focused on his pounding heart that he almost missed the rest of your sentence. “I never wanted you to go. I just wanted you to understand how lonely I’ve been without you. I’m upset with you, but I’ll always love you, and I’ll never be the one asking you to leave.”

Matt stopped breathing for a moment, soaking in the warm relief as it crashed through him. He didn’t have to go, and you loved him. You loved him. You loved him.

“Are you sure?” He forced himself to ask, even though it was the last thing he wanted to do.

You let out a small giggle and pressed your lips to his forehead before responding. “Of course I’m sure, Matty. But it has to change, okay? We can’t do this to each other again.”

Matt could hardly believe the words coming out of your mouth. He would do anything to keep you here, holding him, keeping him safe, loving him. Anything.

“I promise.” He murmured, grabbing at your face to pull it closer to his. “I love you.”

He pressed a million kisses into your face until you let out the melodic laugh that he felt he could get drunk on. He would do anything to hear that sound again, to be the one causing that sound. Anything.

-

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[kendallsroyco]

We don't talk enough about Matt losing his hearing in S2, Charlie portrayed the terror of that situation for Matt so perfectly

[sunflowersandsapphires]

Can I get a Lily for Matt and Frank, how would they react to finding reader crying?

Matt

He’d probably (absolutely) sprint home if he heard you crying

Chuck his cane and everything

Darting up to the apartment, arms outstretched, asking you what was wrong as you burrowed into him

Cradling the back of your head, he’d carry you to the couch and set you in his lap, shushing you softly until you were a bit calmer

He’d be pretty insistent that you tell him what happened, wanting to talk things through with you before coming to a conclusion

Frank 

Frank on the other hand becomes sort of “act first think later” when you’re hurt or upset

Panic sets in whenever he finds you crying. He hides it well but every alarm in his body is screaming for him to FUCKING FIX IT. he hates seeing you cry. 

If he could sell his soul to keep you happy, he would. 

Like Matt, he’d use physical contact to ground you, help calm you down, as well as remind himself that you’re still alive—even if you aren’t happy. 

He’d pretty much demand to know what happened. And as soon as you were tucked into bed that night, he’d search far and wide for whoever wronged you, ready to ensure they didn’t do that ever again

[annmaximoff18]

Y/N and Matt (Daredevil) at a crime scene in Hells Kitchen

Y/N: Okay, everybody stand back. The professionals are here

Matt: darling, be nice. They're just doing their job

Y/N: If they're doing their job, then why are we here?

Matt: ...

Police: ...