#chapter 13 wahoo!

[firephoenix2305]

CHAPTER 13 OF ETERNITY NOW AVAILABLE ON AO3 AND FFNET!

Finally!! I finished writing it! And what a rollercoaster of a chapter; I hope it makes your heart race like mine did while writing it!!

[Post season 2 angst-full with mysteries and adventures and having to stop metaturd, if you'd like to give it a try. Teen and up]

I've written this down on the notes as well, but basically, and I'm so so sorry, I'm going to have to go MIA writing and publishing-wise until at least June. (Nobody died, I just have to concentrate on my finals).

So, to be forgiven (and not having to dance for it), here's a 10k word chapter!!!! Yup, you did read that correctly! Plot heavy, prose heavy (hence why it took so long, dialogue is more my forte) and very, very crazy. Good Omens style. (If I did it right, that is)

<3

Warning: Obscenely badass Aziraphale below cut :)

And actual TW for the chapter: Weapons (swords, spears)

- The building is surrounded - Uriel declared, in the tone of voice of one who is really convinced they have won - Your transport is guarded. I'm sure you've had fun in this wild goose chase, but you have reached the end. You are cornered - - Don't be so sure of that - Aziraphale immediately replied with not a single drop of doubt in his deep, severe voice, making even Crowley get a chill down his spine - I'm not letting you take Eleyn or hurt these people. Whatever that should take - - Spare your empty threats, cherub - Michael shot back, never releasing his eyes - You have no miracles, no way to escape; you're not even armed! - - Yet - the angel snapped, livid, and the archangel's stoic façade finally faltered - You often forget, Michael, that I am the angel of the Eastern Gate. I was created to protect; and I will not hesitate to do it, should you give me a reason- - Who are you trying to intimidate? - the archangel challenged, thought their voice was very slightly higher than before - We outnumber you ten to one - - And you also threaten those I care about – Aziraphale retorted – Believe me, the odds are not in your favor – he took a steadying breath, never releasing Michael’s gaze – Now, stand down and go back the way you came, before we need to make a mess of things- - And if I don’t? - the archangel shot back, though this time there was a slight tremor to their voice. - Then may God forgive me – he breathed, determination burning in his every word.

And another little snippet, because I love this line so freaking much.

Aziraphale knew that feeling; it had accompanied him almost every day for nearly six thousand years of existence. That sinking feeling one got upon understanding that everything they thought to be good wasn’t really that good, and everything they thought to be irredeemably bad maybe wasn’t that bad at all.

[hertzybaby]

ghggggghgghggh just finished reading the rest of Dungeon Meshi last night. Brain is soup with these silly little guys.

[ask-team-donum]

Day 13!! I tried but I couldn't find a panel that was my least favorite? I like them all :3

Some of the First Chapter pages are a bit weird but I still like them,, so instead I redrew a cool panel!! Wahoo!!!

Link to Original Panel!!

[pupmon1]

A new chapter?

Yes.

I am writing again! Wahoo!!

Oh- we got bloodshed. Oh dear- maybe we should focus on that.

[emotional-support-demon-crowley]

Wahoo, it's Wednesday! Time for a new chapter of Terminus.

Chapter 13: Come watch these two idiots being absolutely in love with each other while the threat of Eden's Gate still hangs over them.

[forabeatofadrum]

Wahoo! The last time I did one of these was in September! But here I am. I haven't read fic in a long time, mostly because I am reading non-fics at the moment. And yes, I used to share those as well in this posts, but as the banner says, the post is about fic. The non-fics are afterthoughts.

Here we goooo.

What brought me back to these posts? the map and the treasure by @montrealmadison, which is a missing scenes fic between the time Jack and Bitty kissed and the Hi, Honey chapters and BRUH, I loved it. It's soooo good and I love the bisexual line as a bookend.

It's been an awfully long time since I read Zimbits. I reblogged this fic to my omgcp fics tag on my personal blog and the previous post in that tag was a year ago.

I also read What Do You Get for the Grandson Who Has Nothing and the Grandmother Who Has Everything? by @skeedelvee a while ago and I wanted to make a post about it here and then life happened and I forgor. I am a sucker for post-AWTWB fics that deal with Simon's new family life.

For non-fics... Where do I even start? I've read a lot of Dutch non-fiction books, topics ranging from metaphysics, to adoption, to Sinterklaas and more. I also finally read The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, which blew me away. I had heard that it wasn't another "uwu the villain is just misunderstood" companion piece and YEAH. It's a great exploration of evil and power and also the only reason I am looking respectfully at the recently announced Haymitch book. I even discussed this book in my political philosophy class. I also reread the entire Hunger Games series and man, 13 year old me didn't get the implications back then.

I also finally read Circe by Madeline Miller and Bloom by Kevin Panetta. OH and Nimona by ND Stevenson! And a book called Ain't Burned All the Bright by Jason Reynolds, which is a more poetic book.

Lastly, I reread the Secret Shanghai series by Chloe Gong in preparation of reading the Foul Lady Fortune series, which I have also finished and I loved it. I reserved the novella from the library and now I just have to wait.

SO YEAH.

READING.

[sssammich]

fanfic writer questions

Thanks for the tag, @foibles-fables

1- How many works do you have on AO3?

i'm at 122 right now (wahoo!)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

794,634 (i am on a mission to 1 million in the next couple of years)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

well i've been around many a fandom block, but i'd say for current brainrot:

supergirl (mostly supercorp, but i have a smattering of rare pairs because women, amirite?)

swan queen

bumbleby (i also still have so many rosebird dreams i'll get there someday)

makayuro (with a smattering of rare pairs also because women, amirite?)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

well unsurprisingly, ever since plopping down on supercorp fandom, the numbers have been from there. but shoutout to my victorious fic from 2012 holding strong lol

evergreen, closest i get, not for nothing, you've got mail, and one way or another

5. Do you respond to comments?

yes yes absolutely!! sometimes i am late and sometimes i just leave it in there so i can have it stay unread but anyway i try to respond and i appreciate everyone who sends them to me. i have historically been a oneshot writer so it's been nice also to get comments on wips!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

oh shoot angstiest ending?? well i think i would say my supercorptober ficlet about memory loss of sorts might tick that (it ends kinda idk open but not bad, i will say)

but then there's also this one old soccer RPF i wrote that's more, idk, poetry than any real fic about one of them leaving lmao

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

the happiest ending? i mean all of them, i reckon. if they end up together or have a promise of together then they count lmao

8. Do you get hate on fics?

uhhh none that i've seen? i mean if it's in the comments, no? but if it's elsewhere, then also no? i have been fortunate in that way

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

OMG YES I AM FINALLY IN MY SMUT ERA

uh i reckon comedy smut for now (read DickFic here) but the day is young and my doc is empty so who's to say

but i have dreams for some sad smut because i'd like to develop the range LMAO

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

surprisingly, i do not. what i instead do is just little spin through five fandoms at any given time and just confuse myself that way

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

unfortunately yes. twice now. once was for my victorious fic that was used for a 5th harmony RPF lmaooo

and then on thanksgiving weekend, the first chapter of Crepe AU was posted by an anonymous for a The Wilds ship (but my friends rallied to get it taken down so i didn't have to send a takedown form to ao3 while i was traveling home)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope but that would be totally rad

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i love fic writing group work so yes! i have a series of sad angsty women that i have with my best friend in my revue starlight fandom, and then, of course, @sideguitars and i have 'humans in the storeroom' (that reminds me it's my turn to write the next part smh)

i also like jumping into writing sprints or writing exercises with folks (like a round robin)

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

let's not do this, i shan't pick amongst my children

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

so far all my wips are things i wanna finish and will do my best to finish. i have a couple of retired wips that will just sit in my ao3 forever and i have made peace with them, though.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i wanna say characterization, pacing, emotional resonance, and a simple and natural writing style maybe

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

action?? plot??? proper AUs lmao

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i do not because i find i butcher it and also then i cringe lmao

19. First fandom you wrote for?

oh written for but never posted? hermione/ginny

posted for? god probably All My Children (bianca and maggie) when i was like a teenager hahahahaha

20. Favorite fic you've written?

sorry no can do i love them all because i wrote them and there are so many things i enjoy about them. but i will say that the writing events circuit i've done this past year (supercorp bigbang, bumbleby big bang, and swan queen winter solstice) are born out of a lot of labor of love and i'm really proud of the work i've done for them.

and not for a writing event, but i am also extremely proud of re:live for mayakuro fandom-- that one makes me think that if i never wrote for that fandom again, that that's a really good fic to end on)

No-pressure tags, of course: @sideguitars, @eqt-95, @fazedlight, @luthordamnvers, @vox-ex, and @waytooinvested

(yall have probably done this before but here it just in case!)

[bug-decal-kissing]

Hey friends!

Chasing Stars, by time_woods, was updated today, with 4/? Chapters released! It has a rating of Teen And Up Audiences and No Archive Warnings Apply, with additional tags "Adventure Time AU, chasing stars au, this is like enemies to lovers but one sided enemies and lovers but they dont have a lable for it, neither of them like each other in the begining btw, Sīdus is joke flirter but then it becomes/ gen, this is prismos and scarabs therapy, they colab on the main fic, i put other cause neither of these mfs are cis, they both genderqueer in some way, some of that cosmic gore again, carma has knee problems and its totally not cause im projecting"

You can read it here:

YAAAAAAAAAAAY MORE GENDERQUEER YAOI !!! OWL IS HERE !!!!! Big birde >:] I love Carmine going 👀at Cosmos because he is just a liddle bug man </3/silly. AND NOW THEY HAVE THEIR MASKS AND THE MASKS LOOK LIKE THEM RAAAAAAGH/pos

A new work, Why Me? by phoenixash234flames, was published today, with 1/1 Chapters released! It has a rating of General Audiences and No Archive Warnings Apply, with additional tags "Slight Panic Attack, spoilers for distant lands together again, i feel like I made Scarab too ooc in this but idk, the lich being a constant for Prismo"

You can read it here:

NOOOOOOOO PRISMO MY BOY :,[ he's never done a thing wrong in his life he doesn't deserve his friends dying :[ I love tsundere scarab so much *clenches fist* yes he will comfort his boyfriend yes he will be in love no he will not admit either <3

NSFW works are below the cut :].

Interlinked, by Finn565, was updated today, with 13/14 Chapters released! It has a rating of Explicit and Graphic Depictions Of Violence, and Major Character Death, with additional tags "Human AU, Blade Runner AU, I played pretty lose with the lore so forgive me for that, Violence, not too gorey tho, Slow Burn, Enemies to Lovers, Orbo is a piece of shit, sorry I just made him that way in this fic, Prismo is just a lovely guy, Prismo is going to teach Scarab to love fr, Kissing, Hurt/Comfort, Porn With Plot, smut in later chapters, Confessions, Trans Scarab, they’re in love your honor, Suicidal Thoughts, someone dies but I have a plan I promis, Just stuck with me, The suicidal thoughts are just for a moment and they do not kill themselves, Okay I promise there is a happy ending for this, Minor Character Death"

You can read it here:

FINALLY AAAAAAAAA/pos !! I'M GONNA START CRYING FROM RELIEF ANHG.... HE'S BACK,,,,,,, AND ORBO IS DEAD YIPPIE !!! WAHOO !!! I can die happy now/j peace and love,,, on planet earth,,,,,,,,, I am so relieved for real/gen

A new work, when wings emerge from crucible chrysalis by lacrimalis, was publushed today, with 1/1 Chapters released! It has a rating of Explicit and No Archive Warnings Apply, with additional tags "Established Relationship, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Heart-to-Heart, Edging, Crying, Mindbreak, Twisted and Fluffy Feelings, Fluffy Ending, Bottom Scarab (Adventure Time)"

You can read it here:

PICKLE TIME LET'S GO ! Prismo is so mean to Simon and for what </3 they are so in love and like each other it's going to make me punch a wall/silly Fellas, if you don't pet your boyfriend while making out are you really in love ?/j

[24-guy]

Wahoo. Car lights update. B)

[inked-out-trees]

3 7 9 for the ask thing? Thanks :)

3. What's a fic idea that you have but haven't started writing yet?

my latest in cornley aus in my brain (because there's always one or two just kicking around for funsies) is a cornley poltytechnic detective (s)agency! sort of a funky little noir-esque thing featuring the whole team bringing their own assets (as it were) to solving silly little cases in the sleepy town of cornley. as I type this out I'm getting more ideas. hmm.

also, because you're the one asking this question haha, here's a single line i have written in my otis is stoned tab in my personal discord: "alternative oneshot where one of them goes away on an extended work trip or something and then other one misses them so hard they turn into a ghost"

7. What's a trope you love to write?

well you gotta know most of me by now. here's something that may be considered a trope? or maybe it's just me being silly. following lines of narration with someone speaking the exact same line out loud in their dialogue. like from heisting 101:

This file is not corrupted, the man assures her, except, well. It’s not so much a blueprint as it is a square with numbers around it.

“That’s not a blueprint,” One says, first into the room. “That’s a square with numbers around it.”

or from the soon-to-come secret santa in july fic:

Annie’s not home, but her roommate is. “She’s not home,” Vanessa says. “But I am.”

i don't know what it is about lines like these i just think they're funny as hell

9. What's your favourite line(s) or scene(s) that you've written?

I am supposed to be writing job application letters right now and instead I am going through my old writing like it means something. (it does. I love my old work.)

there's a couple answered in this ask from 2022, but because this opens up to scenes I have more room to speak! wahoo!

Fixed Point specifically - there's a lot (a lot) I love about this one but I have to say the "trevor and francis listen to music on opposite sides of the bars" in the most-recently-posted chapter 5 is on the top tier. joined by "zee curses chris out for leaving her" (chapter 14) and "robert curses chris out for giving up" (chapter 13) ... there's a theme here.

Not Fixed Point Specifically - the entire wet therapy chapter of ex-home, Spy Day from make off like a band(it) (i put so much work into planning it the whole onenote page of planning I have exclusively for that chapter proves it), the end of chapter 2 in three counts ("i like my life, i'm just worried this daydream is gonna end" "it doesn't have to!" everything explodes)

[arkhammaid]

CHAPTER 13 IS OUT WAHOO

THE LEGACY OF NEMESIS.

Oscar Piastri retires at the age of 39, with six World Championships to his name. He has achieved his dreams, he became part of history, one of the greatest known in the pinnacle of Motorsports.

But then he wakes up to Alpine announcing his promotion back in 2022 and like last time, he doesn't pull any punches.

(Someone should've really told him to not only think about holding back, but actually do it.)

a story told in snippets, including; sassy!oscar, mclaren driver!oscar, once again an insight to the craziness of f1 twitter/tumblr, self aware!oscar but also oblivious!oscar, time travel and more!

chapter; ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT, NINE, TEN, ELEVEN, TWELVE, THIRTEEN

memes; chapter three, chapter four, chapter five , chapter six , oscarina edition , mclaren flopping by @boiohboii , chapter seven/eight , some memes by @fishkashi0123 , more memes by @iamapersonwholikesunicorns , oscarina edition part 2

headcanons: oscarina hcs , oscarina hcs part 2

author notes; with the charles fic done, i'm very happy to continue the series with oscar 🤭 be ready for some surprises

find the charles version of the time travel fic here!

ARKHAM MAID 2024

[j-writes-fics]

Posted WIP Fics!

Second Chance | PotC Reincarnated

13/? chapters -- ON HIATUS

Pirates of the Caribbean

Willabeth, Sparrington

PotC characters are reincranated into a more modern world. Shenanigans wahoo

SHIELD High Groupchat

7/? chapters

Marvel Cinematic Universe

various, no main

Marvel characters except i put them in high school lol. and its in chatfic form.

Third Eye

5/? chapters

Psych

youll have to wait and see (((:

A more... paranormal version of psych. Real psychic Shawn.

I hope it's quiet when I'm dead

2/4? chapters

Psych

(:

shawn is losing the will to live.

Series

Sometimes the Truth is Harder to Believe

Window to the Soul

[allsassnoclass]

Hazel’s 2022 Writing Roundup

some of you may be thinking “but hazel, you just did a 2022 writing self-evaluation” well this is DIFFERENT this one is almost completely by the numbers and includes GRAPHS

a summary of my writing this year is under the cut!

Let’s start out easy.  How many fics did I write?  What was the fandom distribution?

11 5sos fics on AO3

2 1d fics on AO3

1 fic for the It movies on AO3

1 fic for Stranger Things on AO3

1 fic for High School Musical: The Musical: The Series on AO3

1 fic for Cobra Kai on AO3

13 ask box prompts right here on tumblr (all for 5sos)

Here’s a handy little pie chart:

As you can clearly see, 5sos still totally dominated my writing year.  I assume this will continue, although it could possibly even out slightly next year depending on how much cobra kai retains its claws in me and if I expand into any other fandoms.

Total word count: 147,702  wahoo!  That’s more words than Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austin or One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Main pairing distribution (for the 5sos ones)(friendship fics are counted under the overarching pairing, as it focuses on those two (or four) characters)

Cake: 2

Cashton: 5

Lashton: 1

Malum: 2

Mashton: 10

Muke: 2

OT4: 1

Roylum: 1

I think it’s no surprise that mashton is by far my favored pairing, but i’m surprised that cashton had so many fics when malum and lashton did not, as previously I favored those two pairings a lot and I would say cashton is tied for my third or fourth favorite pairing, rather than above either of those.  In fact, the fact that lashton has less than cake (who i historically do not write) is very surprising.  it looks like i should step up my lashton game a bit next year, although I have to confess that I don’t have any strong ideas for them right now (besides unmute, which constantly haunts me).  I also only got 1 lashton prompt request this year  out of the 15 total i received, which definitely impacted how much I wrote them.

Here’s a little pie chart, to fully show just how much mashton dominates my writing:

For ao3 ratings, I had 15 teen, 1 for general audiences, and 1 mature fic.  All of my ask box prompts are rated teen as a general rule

For my 5sos writings I wrote:

10 fics or ask box prompts that I had the ideas for or received before 2022

10 fics or ask box prompts that I had the ideas for or received during 2022

One of the ones from before 2022 has not been posted, as it’s chapter 6 of an ongoing work.  There is another fic from 2022 that is complete that I’ve been holding on to until the right now.

I started keeping track of all of my ideas and when I got them (or received the prompt for them) this year because I was curious to see how many of my fics were new ideas or not, and I’m honestly surprised that it’s so even!  I’m not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that.  Looking at which specific fics got completed, only one of the 2022 ideas that I posted was an AO3 fic (when i watch the world burn).  The other 9 were ask box prompts from my follower milestone celebration.

I added 30 ideas to my 5sos ideas doc in 2022!

For word count, all of my AO3 fics are somewhere between 1,395 and 50,140.  pas de deux (the 50,140 word fic) is the longest fic I’ve ever written by over 20,000 words!  I will likely not stop talking about it any time soon lol.  It is also my favorite fic of the year, as it includes ballet, minnesota, and hotei within his sack, which are all things that I love dearly.

Looking ahead, what does the future of hazel fic hold?  I have no idea!  We’re playing it completely by ear.  Hopefully, it’s enjoyable for everyone involved.  If you’ve read this far, I am giving you my affection

[nedlittle]

EVERYTHING WRONG WITH 'THE ARCTIC FURY' (2020) ***NOT CLICKBAIT***

i read (and liveblogged) greer macallister's the arctic fury aka the book where lady jane enlists a donner party survivor and a group of assorted women to find the remnants of the FE and i'm sorry to report that it's....like really bad. the history is bad, apparently the legal proceedings are completely implausible, the writing is amateurish and vague.

a strong contender for the worst book i've read all year. badly-expressed grievances and a few highlights under the cut:

again the general conceit is that lady jane asks donner party survivor virginia reed reeve to lead a group of women to the arctic to find her husband. nobody involved has been to the arctic before and somehow they think this will work. initially lady jane's reasons are Wahoo Girl Power we can do anything men can do if we're given the opportunity.

spoiler alert: these are not her real motivations

so the first quarter is just virginia going around collecting her team a year ago with flashes to the present timeline trial where she is accused of murder and kidnapping. there are 13 women total and many of them have One Personality Trait which is their occupation most of the time. they're so forgettable that we can breeze through them easily

98% of the book is told by virginia but then once in a while, one of the others will get a singular chapter and there are zero changes to the narrative voice

christabel is an illustrator who we know nothing about before she falls from the rigging and cracks her skull open. zero emotional connection because she's hardly characterized and her death is so boringly-written and predictable. NEXT!

ann wears pants and breeds dogs and i'm not even joking when i say the most notable thing she does is kill herself and let the dogs loose because she does not want them to get eaten. yes, the possibility of eating her is suggested, no they do not actually go through with it :( NEXT!

ebba and althea are a package deal and their plot is so stupid you could remove both of them entirely and the story would lose absolutely nothing. it may actually come out better without them because the writing for those two chapters is atrocious. they're both wives of the INEXPLICABLY FAKE officers that macallister makes up rather than actually use the crew manifests from the FE....the entirely of the "storyline" comes down to

and then by the end it's all miraculously resolved?? would have loved to see that except ebba, althea, dove, and margaret (who somehow manages to matter even less because every time her name came up i had to consult the expedition list at the front) are put on a boat for half the story and cease to have any narrative purpose!! they both live but ngl kinda wish macallister had buried her gays. NEXT!

ebba: i'm gay

althea: i'm homophobic

[they kiss]

margaret is a journalist. i don't remember if she even had a POV chapter and cannot tell you anything about her except for the fact that she lives. NEXT

caprice is the only one with an actual personality and that personality is that she's a rich and bossy moutaineer who butts heads with virginia but eventually has a good heart. she dies when she, stella, and elizabeth fall into a crevasse (fun! i liked this!) and in true arctic self-sacrifice fashion has the other two stand on her shoulders to get rescued and then cannot reach the rope so she freezes to death. it's her alleged murder that the trial hinges upon, and, like i said, i think her death is a good choice that would show her character development and be emotional if macallister actually showed character development rather than zipping through the expedition and telling everything through virginia's perspective.

oh yeah, elizabeth is caprice's maid who is forced to come along and does not want to be here (understandable). the notable things about her are that she is black and picks up skills well. that's it. she survives the crevasse but fakes her own death so she can stay in the arctic with some trappers and enjoy more freedom than she could ever hope for back in boston. this is a really interesting idea that i would love to read a better book about. justice for elizabeth. NEXT!

stella is also a maid and also stays up north with elizabeth and she's very lucky to be afforded three (3!!) whole traits which are 1) she's beautiful 2) she's a kleptomaniac 3) she got pregnant by her employer and has to give birth on the ship that's taking them to repulse bay and then the crew get mad and kick them off the ship 400 miles south of their destination. she's elizabeth but vanilla-flavoured plot device edition. NEXT!

stella's baby dies of course

irene is a translator whose tongue was cut out by her husband because he didn't like that she could exclude him from conversations in so many languages. again, that could be an interesting idea, but it doesn't go anywhere. however she did cut his heart out in revenge. i like irene. she gaslit. she gatekept. she girlbossed. and she lived! NEXT!

"doro"thea is a navigator and mapmaker with great theoretical knowledge of the arctic but not many practical skills. she has a key role in the trial but i was so past caring at the point. lives, but gets horrible snowblindness and loses an ear to frostbite. NEXT!

dove is also on the boat of plot irrelevance. her backstory is that she was a nurse during the mexican-american war, and, after she testifies against virginia, she fucks off to help with the crimean war and is never heard of again. good for her. NEXT!

siobhan is saved for last because she's my favourite. not because she was better written than the others, or had more screentime, but because her story has the most potential for a spin-off and i want to see it but i don't want macallister to write it. siobhan is a cis woman who wants to study medicine and have the privileges of a man and lucky for her has an identical twin who is like hello i'm a trans woman why don't you pretend to be me so you can go to med school and i'll pretend to be you so i can be a girl and cover your ass so nobody knows you went to the arctic. they are confusingly both called siobhan. cis siobhan comes home and immediately fucks off to aid the yellow fever epidemic in new orleans. trans siobhan appears exactly one (1) time to visit virginia in prison and vaguely help her. the trans stuff is handled surprisingly well considering the rest of the book is written with a rudimentary understanding of nuance and prose.

WHERE'S THE SPINOFF NOVEL ABOUT THE SIOBHANS IT SOUNDS LIKE A BLAST

again. everyone gets one (1) chapter to themselves and the rest is just virginia who narrates with all the subtlety and finesse of an emo teenager posting livejournal entries for the first time.

hey, a donner party-franklin expedition crossover could be kind of interesting, you say. yeah buddy, i thought so too. and somehow it ended up being the most boring thing in the entire goddamn world.

just to restate, there is no cannibalism in this crossover between

THE DONNER PARTY and the FRANKLIN EXPEDITION

the two golden girls of mismanaged cannibalism parties in 1840s north america....

there's also no murder. boo hiss how boring

it's so unexpectedly christian beyond period-typical christianity

i touched on this before but macallister makes up fake erebus lieutenants for althea and ebba to be married to ("james porter" and "daniel green") which is just.

dumb.

the crew manifests exist. just give like. fairholme and gore wives. it's not as though their real wives led extraordinarily well-documented lives. why this. also it's not as if their fakeass husbands even matter

apart from sir john himself being a plot device, there's so little care or concern by either the author or the in-universe expedition for the expedition they're supposed to be searching for. there's no attention or care given to it, i don't recall ever seeing the words 'northwest passage'. this was a Big News Story, internationally! and yet nobody seems to care or want to know what happened! not only does this essentially render the goal of the expedition moot since nobody in the book aside from lady jane and john rae (off-page) appears to even know the FE existed. this is such a weird choice!! ebba & althea's fake husbands vanished forever with 126 other men and they don't even utter a word about wanting to find them??

none of the other crew members aside from sir john and the fake ones exist?? nobody wants to know what happens and they barely find evidence and the fact that they're looking for the FE stops being relevant very quickly

but what about the actual arctic expedition that the gals are undertaking?? you may ask. good question

i don't fuckin know

it takes over half the book for them to set foot on ice and then the other half is pure nothing. not only is the geography vague (and it's vague all right. so is the FE history), but the action is too. macallister is positively zooming through the narrative without care for setting or character it's a lot of 'and then (x) did this and they told stories and virginia thought about the Very Bad Thing and the ice was cold'. imagine 130 pages of that. insufferable.

are there indigenous people at all in the entirety of canada??? who's to say. they're mentioned the same way ghosts are.

virginia has a kind of Thing with the captain who's supposed to be taking them to repulse bay. it's not quite a romance but it is charged and i will admit that the captain is kinda sexy but he's also the only character who acts mostly like a real human person.

so they find The Tins and caprice has a fit of rage and stabs one of the tins and drinks directly from it and it's a miracle that she doesn't get tetanus. then she IMMEDIATELY is horribly sick and you're like fucking finally we're talking about the franklin expedition and those goddamn tins.

and then it's revealed that she just.

ate some bad leaves and was sick because of that

caprice is also notably the only character to wear her corset (called 'stays' at one point. girl it's 1853....) in the arctic......everyone else is straight up not wearing a bra the entire time. their BACKS. enjoy your frostbitten titties ladies.

that's all i can think of right now but good fucking lord.

wait i just remembered that NOBODY GETS SCURVY

no cannibalism...no murder...no scurvy...what's the point sis

[dreamdripdistance]

WAHOO I LOVE SENDING ASKS 13 and 15 if you havent done those :) 💕

(I LOST MY DRAFT FOR THIS SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO ANSWER)

13: A game you were the most excited for when it wasn’t released yet?

OH DEFO DELTARUNE, both the inital release of chapter 1 and chapter 2, the hype for both was Worth It

though by proxy of my brother im also really excited for elden ring, even though i Probably never play it, it just looks Stunning

15: Which two games do you think would make an awesome crossover?

i remember seeing art/fic for a kh and transistor crossover that quite literally destroyed me it was so :_;

but other than that im not super sure im not a crossover person hehe (though, i keep thinking ignis from ffxv sounds like a male bayonetta so.... lmao i gotta draw that now HFBDKFBSK)

[candyqueenblog]

First Lines Tag Game

I was tagged by @worse0mens and @supergeek21 for this game where you post the first line or so from 20 of your most recent writings and then tag 10 more of your favorite writers. To be tagged is an honor and a delight and I would be remiss if I DIDN’T play too because this sounds like oodles and kit and kaboodles of fun! 🤩 (Please note, some of the fics/writing on her is rated E, so if you’re a youngin’ - GIT! And anyone who knows me IRL, please don’t ever bring it up ;     ; ) Placed below cut because it got LONG lol (Self-reblogging because I am dummy and forgot to add tags 😅)

1. Bea L. Zebub (or just “Beelzebub” to her unfortunate employees) was dead. (A Christmas Omen)

2.  The bookshop doors slammed open hard enough to crack the spot where the knob met the wall.  Crowley stormed into the building, his amber eyes flashing dangerously behind his round, dark lenses. (Flames of Anger and Hellfire)

3. Crowley couldn’t help but wonder… ‘Why was it always apples?’ (The Taste of Apples)

(Note: #3 was a collab with @vivi-theakuneko for a zine. She handled the art, I handled the writing!)

4. Aziraphale had been looking for this book for centuries. (Ivdkuranavyja)

(Note: #4 was a collab with @crowleymowley for a zine. There’s some cool art in THIS one too! 👀)

5. Physicists, scientists, and philosophers have grappled with the theory of infinite, alternate universes ever since psychologist William James coined the term in 1895. Though the context of the word was different for James than it is now, current theory posits that there are an infinite number of alternate realities out there and, together, they make up the totality of existence in a great cosmic pile called the multiverse. (Universe A and B)

6.  Hi my name is Anthony Janthony Ashtoreth Fire Crowley and I have long fiery red hair (that’s how I got my name) with black streaks and purple tips that reaches my mid-back and snakey yellow eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like David Tenant (AN: if u don’t know who he is get da hell out of here!). (My Ineffable)

7. “To my sister!” Gabriel cheered, lifting a flute of champagne in a toast. The woman in question, Zira Fell, raised her own flute in answer with a face-splitting grin. (Saltwater on Skin - Wives Edition)

8. It was raining the day Azira reunited with Crowley. (Awaken Their Ashes Unto Pain)

(Note: The line from #8 is TECHNICALLY in the SECOND chapter, but this fic is a collab with @new-endings and she wrote the first chapter, while I wrote the second and we are alternating between the two)

9. “To my brother!” Gabriel cheered, lifting a flute of champagne in a toast. The man in question, Ezra Fell, raised his own flute in answer with a face-splitting grin. (Saltwater on Skin)

(Note: #9 is the exact same story as #7, just the genders changed)

10.  Ezra had awoken several times throughout the night, convinced that he was going to miss his family’s departure if he didn’t go to the beach right now! (Sharing Three Kisses)

(Note: #10 is a story divergence of #9)

11. Raphael closed the door of A.Z. Fell & Co behind him with a soft click as he stepped out onto the streets of Soho. He folded his hands in front of his stomach and rocked back and forth on his heels. “Well. That was awkward,” he said to himself. (To Build a Future on Earth)

12.  The early August heat hung heavy in the air, and the apple tree he sat beneath was laden with unripened fruits.  The tart, green apples wouldn’t be ready until early October, but their scent was still carried on every puff of warm breeze and every passing cloud that promised rain for the afternoon. (The Prince and the Serpent)

13. At 26 years old, Aziraphale Fell (if both his parents weren’t already dead, he’d have strangled them himself for giving him such a moniker) was one of the youngest self-made millionaires in history.  (Ruin and Rebuilding)

14. Prince Anthony Centary was many things: a lover of fast carriages, younger half-brother to Lord Beatrus, and purveyor of fine clothes. He was also a four-foot red-bellied serpent currently snagged under a rose bush. (Gardens, Snakes, and Kisses)

(Note: #14 was written as a contest entry some time ago for @berrytera’s Cursed Prince AU)

15.  Up until the moment he died, Captain Medina would never be able to tell what it was that had convinced him to visit the island early. (3 Hours Earlier)

16.  William straightened the lapels of his uniform as he climbed out of his car and marched up the long, winding walkway to the manor of Thaddeus Dowling, Ambassador. (A Case of Mistaken Identity)

(Note: #16 was a commission from @queerspacewhale, and its prequel is in the works. I promise, friend! It ended up being a bit more in-depth than originally planned lol)

17.  His siblings were all hobbits of good moral standing, as is expected of living in a place called “Hobbiton”. (Dragonfire)

(Note: #17 was a commission from @fanlan1! I’d never really written crossover fics before this point, so this was a fun experience!)

18. “5... 4... 3... 2... 1... HAPPY NEW YEAR!” “Wahoo...” (A Treatise on Pinnipeds)

19. Crowley was staring at him with a predatory look, but was curled up in the corner with his back to the wall. (Instincts)

20. Ezra stood back and admired his handiwork. (Surprise)

Patterns: I think mine tend to start out fairly mild, or they come out of NOWHERE like a slap to the face. No in between lol

Favorite: #5, simply because it sounds super-smart! :D

(Feel free to skip over if you want when I tag you ^^) @new-endings, @wyvernquill, @unproblematicme, @mordellestories, @caedmonfaith, @scrapheapchallenge, @summerofspock, @holycatsandrabbits, and @nohaijiachi