#cave dweller music

[cavedwellermusic]

Oxygen Destroyer - Guardian of the Universe (2024)

Macho Frost of Texas Toast Chainsaw Massacre looks at Guardian of the Universe, the brand new album from Seattle kaiju themed thrash death band Oxygen Destroyer, released August 9th on Redefining Darkness Records.

The Pacific Northwest’s own kaiju worshipping death thrash outfit Oxygen Destroyer has done it again. This time a tribute the mighty Heisei Gamera trilogy of the 90’s, which if you have not watched I HIGHLY recommend, they are whoopass. Every album OD drop they get better and better, and this point I don’t know how they are going to top this one. This is easily one of my favorite metal releases of 2024.

Listen to the album and read the full review:

[heritage-harmony-records]

Legions Of Doom To Release The Skull 3 Via Tee Pee Records

Tom Hanno of Tom's Reviews looks at The Skull 3, the upcoming album from newly formed doom metal group The Skull and Legions Of Doom, coming September 13th on Tee Pee Records.

The Skull put out two outstanding albums with ex-Trouble frontman, Eric Wagner, whose untimely passing could have ended the project altogether. Thankfully, the band persisted in a new form, and with a few new members … enter, Legions Of Doom.

Read Tom's full article and listen to the singles:

[fidjiefidjie]

Bon Soir 🆕️🌝🔥💙

The Cave Dwellers band 🎶 Rises up

Animation de Rui Barbosa

[graceofagodswrath]

Ok ok ok your "Humans of Transformers franchise are space orcs" rant is out of this world.

I detest with passion when humans are reduced to pets and plot devices when instead the story could be about two alien species finding one another equally amazing/terrifying for their own respective reasons.

Here is my question: do humans and Cybertronians see how eerily similar they are? They have love of music, familial relationships, similar urban infrastructure, societal structure, financial systems, competitive entertainment, organized societies and war, colonialism, recreational intercourse, marriage...

Not to mention, why was it never addressed how similar both species look: bipedal, waists, noses, cheekbones, 5 fingers, chins, facial expressions and sense of aesthetics and beauty? Sure, humans have hair but in rather strategic places.

Veins and wires, blood and energon, metal and flesh, nanobytes and blood cells, Sparks and brain impulses, sexual organs...

Imagine Autobots arrive on Earth for the first time expecting some primitive cave-dwellers, only to encounter a less advanced mini-version of Cybertronian cities (New York, Singapore, London, Rome, Tokyo, Rio, Dubai...) and societies running on scientific, artistic and philosophical development which has no right existing on the ruthless, all-organic planet such as Earth is. Societes run by creatures who 4.000.000 (the duration of their war) years ago were hanging from the trees btw.

Autobots would be terrified.

Lemme make sure this response saves this time, cause it took me a minute to answer cause my first deleted and I had so much written I got unbelievably angry and refused to even look at the tumblr app.

But here we are.

So, this is EXACTLY what I have been thinking about for who k owe how long. It’s also the intro to this wack as fuck universe idea I’ve had in my head a while, and have kinda hinted at in my other works, but I’ve never gone into detail about.

And I still won’t.

Anyways, yes. It’s crazy that we backlit humans so much when any other sentient species is about. Transformers, TMNT, etc (I’m on a one track mind, feel free to jot down any other fandoms I can’t think of). The main theme of these stories? HUMANS SUCK. And that is severely unfair. People want to cry about how much our generation doesn’t give a shit anymore. Have you SEEN the media we feed kids???

That’s why I live Humans are Space Orcs so much. It really puts into perspective how unique and batshit our species is.

So, onto the Transformers vs humans concepts. The ONLY reason (forgoing technoism and general hate towards organics) cybertronians don’t see humanity as an imminent threat, or one in general, is because of size. WE BE SMALL AF. Can’t blame them, I get it. We do the same. Insects? Fuck them mfs.

But have you seen a botfly or tick burrow into your skin? The infection that comes form that? Have you seen ants jump a small animal as a colony and absolutely shred it? Or a spider only biting you, and the horror the venom causes (recluses and huntsman’s specifically). We have a good fucking reason for disliking these mfs.

But transformers? These are organic experiences. Worst they go through are rust infections, spark death, the works. They are not at risk the same way we are. That is why they view organics as small and inconsequential. They have no idea how hard we fight to simply stay alive.

And now the similarities. It’s understandable that they wouldn’t immediately recognize the physical, cultural, and psychological similarities between our species. Transformers are an incredibly diverse race, like any other. But specifically in physical form. Your average cybertronian holds a similar appearance to your average human. We tend to have the same features, just with different names. Eyes, noses, faceplates, ears, two arms, two legs. Sure that’s average for them too. But they are unique because of the fact that they have two forms. Vehicle mode. Their mode decides what they’re second mode looks like, which can create extreme diversity is appearance. Small, large, many limbed or not.

So the immediate similarities probably wouldn’t jump out to them in an odd way. There’s also the idea that because they’re so spread out in the universe, they’ve seen other organic races that are also similar. Pairs of every body part could be the common denominator among species.

That goes culturally too. War, love, music, government, politics, it’s all a natural form of sentient evolution. Another common denominator. It’s how it’s done that makes it unique. And the similarities between human and cybertronian culture is uncomfortably familiar.

I think that’s why cybertronians are seen being closest with humans rather than other species in the shows and comics (obviously because the audience is human and they need relation to characters but shhhh forget that for a sec). This is where the theories start.

Let’s say cybertronians begin to recognize the weird similarities between our species. The really, really weird stuff. The itty bitty details. Like:

- how we also mainstream kissing on the lips as the top tier romantic gesture.

- use verbal tone and cues for our language.

- have intensely complicated interpersonal relationships in the exact same manner.

- suffer from extreme mental health issues like depression, anxiety, PTSD (I totally headcannon that forms of adhd, autism, and ocd exist in cybertronian society, have y’all not seen my boy rodimus prime??)

- will also destroy each other in the name of our gods, until we have a common enemy.

That’s just the basics I could come up with. The only time I actually saw a moment where a transformer genuinely take a moment to realize that humans can be a threat, was in transformers prime. Episode 6 of beast wars (I think, correct me if wrong), where Miko beats the ever loving fuck out of an insecticon (I think) and upon Megatron hearing this, just goes blank Kubrick stare for a hot second. Man had an ugly realization that did not fit in with anything he had experienced his whole life.

AND THEY NEVER FUCKING ADDRESSED IT EVER AGAIN. Sick of this shit. Could’ve had the most badass character development, where the humans actually proved useful and did something (it would have fit Milo’s character so perfectly too) and scared the utter shit out of the transformers. BUT NO. They continue to be annoying as fuck.

One thing I loved about TF Prime was that it canonically turned Unicron into Earth. And humans came from the earth. Which relates humans beings and cybertronians so hard. Cousins Fr. We are the cybertronian equivalent of organics, and transformers the inorganic equivalent of humans. The individuality, the chaos, the culture, it clicks. There is so much material to really go into it.

But they never do. Don’t get me wrong, I love Transformers lord and just discovering more without humans being involved. We’re just annoying af at this point. But there is so much u tapped potential in transformers actually taking the chance to LEARN about us. But we’re just friends (pets) to these mfs.

That’s why I love TF Earthspark so far. Transformers ingrained into human culture because they’re not from Cybertron, and cybertronians having to adapt to human culture because they have no where else to go. Granted, it’s a kids show. There’s only so much they can do. But I’m excited for where it’ll lead. It really shows how much of threat and ally humans are, and how we are just as diverse as cybertronians.

I need to write another fic about cybertronians meeting humans their size from our world tho. Need to continue my old piece. Would give me so much life. Y’all help motivate me, college draining my ass.

[paintlesscanvas]

haii!! could we request vampire/emo themed snpts please? thanks in advance!! (your blog is super awesome sauce)

VAMPIRIC / EMO SNPTS . .

System Names: the chained up collective, the sun-fearing system, bats hanging upside down, the ruby gloom system, the drained collective, the undying creatures, creepy catacombs, the cave dwellers, the dyed hair collective, gerard way’s fanbase, the fanged lovers, the bloodless, murder of crows, the parasol wielders, the hot topic system, the exhausted, minute misery, smudged eyeliner system, the ghoulfriends, those shrouded in shadow, cramped coffins, the vein drainers, those damn dhampirs, batty bitches, the headbanging collective, the emo system, the dark circle system, the studded belt collective, the cobwebbed coffin, the crying collective, the melancholic, batty bloodbath, the fanged system, the flying bats, the blood-filled cauldron, the fanged, the vegan vamps, the reflectionless collective, fishnet freaks, the sad playlists, the stitched hearts, bloody bruises, the weirdos, mister, the fallen down, the cursed collective, helena’s graveyard, the empty system, the graveyard dancers, the bloodied blades, closeted skeletons, striking violent poses, the fearful, the strange and unusual, those with the darkened clothes, the mortuary collective, the unbeating hearts, shadow lurkers, the grotesque ghouls, the raccoon tailed, the weary and worn, those from transylvania, the empty chalice, the demolition lovers, the decrimson stains, the teenagers, monster high, the bat colony, the counts of the night, the wounded fingers collective, the lonely, those that returned from the ashes, the immortal system, the mysterious rejects, the bleeding makeup collective, the scarlet drinkers, the horror show, broken hearted, the emo cult, the dhampirs, totally not posers, torn and frayed, the bloody things, the graveyard obsession, the silent pulse, the strays, the bat-winged system, those who blast music, the vampiric manor, those who come out at night, the headphone wearers, the ones drowning in music, the haunted forest, warped with hate, the tattered clothes collective, the outcasted, the bleeding, the romeos and juliets, the failures,

Usernames: surroundedbynight, liesinthebooks, sxwithaghost, vamprieofthepalace, fshnetglves, tonightisthenight, vampfangz, yrfavoritevampire, kneeh1ghconverse, julietscmndlust, messydrinker, romeosbloodiedhnds, tututhousands, raisedglasses, cleanupyrlooks, chainedcastle, chaliceofblood, skullst4k3s, mortalbats, teenagersrscary, sluuuuuuurp, saneabandonedme, onyxsoooul, mmyspacekween, baaaaatwings, cannibalglow, commandedlust, myssspaceking, coginthemrdrmchine, eldritchemo, batwisp, txtteredpxges, fangsintoflesh, swoopshadow, checkrdconvrse, vampygrlfrnd, hopeandshadow, aspirationstoshreds, vampybyfrnd, bloodycauldron, lovewithavampire, amurderofbats, plasmapouch, deadlydeparted, cadavercutie, em1lythestr4nge, shrpstlves, hidinginmycloak, rosesforthedead, dxeadlynightshade, vans4life, ripupyourheads, legsandtongue, heymisery, theblackparade, splitgoblet, bitingvampire, hshtaghosted, warruined, gallonsofblood, caprisunblood, rrrrrrbl, vxmpyrrr, darkenyrclothes, wermonsterhigh, rubygloooom, deadbats, silverdippedcrown, brnthempires, castlecrawl, dearlydeceased, pileofbones, returnfromtheashes, dripdripdrip, halfhumanhalfnot, batbatbatbat, elvirasratings, violentpose, itsnothertime, garlicsting, bloodchugger, awfulfuck, completecooperation, weallgotohell, countofthenight, rvencrws, scaredofstakes, twooofanged, ddaintydhampir, buildingacoffin, brrrkenheart, garishgh0ul, gerardseyeliner, outsiiider, bloodthorne, imnotokayipromise, weallfalldown, tangledhxadphones, notaposerpls, dxadliest2lead, fortuneandflame, hiddentomb, cryptchaser, someonewillbleed, hangry4humans, gerardwaaaay, topofthemanor, bloodyhiss, no1garlichater, youwearmeout, fulloflies, gr4vedweller, undeadlxve, actuallyanemo, mcrcutie, bloodybtch, sh1mmeryfangs, fuckofagun, tornandfrayed, unholyveins, crampedcoffin, cobwebbedcoffin, thnkabtthestakes, vampirism, mychmiclrmnce, number1, batsbeforethemoon, fffangedkillr, raaaventamer, crackedskin, touchedbyangels, b1temrks, bloodbeforelove, warpedwithhate, murderofcrows, yrmyonlyhpe, releasethebats, gravedancer, crrpycutie, bldsckingfreak, cheersforrevenge, abyssalbite, chillinwmycoven, freaktastic, cause4thequeen, fangtasia, razrfringe, vampsdoitbetter, backfromthegrave, beastinrepose, dracscastle, needlessbeating, bathedinfire, plasticfangsss, vamprism, beenababygirl, lookalivesnshiiine, trnsxualtrnsvnya, number2, raisedabetterson, cemeterybaby, fangtastic, litrlydead, madgear, misslekid, looking4thecure, houseofwolves, gerardshairstrand, transylvan1a, scuffedcmbatboots, oldguillotine, chappedandfaded, eatyrheartout, blltprfheart, eylnyrdwnmyface, skltonheart, nananananana, screeeaaaam, gothicmusic, number3, sweetrvnge, vmprdiaries, nbdyundrstnds, undrprssre, drwninglssns, guitarshredder, stayoutofthelight, thatissoghoul, raccoontailss, number4, demoniademon, knifeinmyhands, nocturnaaal, blackattire, blackpolish, hereishelena, horrorshows, burymeinblack, idontloveyou, headfirst4halos, crledupinmybed, number5, hospitalstay, witchingh0ur, incineratingmatch, stainedblade, ilvethe1780s, sharpenedblade, l3thallust, fndtnsofdecay, m4ne4ter, sp1nesp1ke, vamps4humans, holdingontonight, b1teme, solonggoodnight, ladyofsorrows, howidissapear, vampirecountscount, shadowstained, mybulletsyrlve, lvemyghoulfriends, heartaaache, fangbangers, batskeleton, traceofthrfangs, deathnvrstpyou, foggynight, eyelinertears, cmtrydrve, demolitionlvrs, missingheartbeat, burntbyacross, giveemhellkid, spooningavampyre, themurderscene, chillycuddles, coldtothetouch, deadeyes, fuzzyyybats, myagonyyy, famouslastwords, ghostofyou, mrried2themusic, eyesrshiningbrght, d4ngerd4ys, thx4thevenom,

Names: aamon, adalaide, adrienn, aeron, agatha, agony, ahimoth, alistair, altaire, altar, alyx, ambrose, ambrosia, ash, ashe, astrophel, auberon, aux, ax, axton, barrett, batsy, blade, blaire, blaze, bones, burdett, cadell, cage, calypso, carnage, carnamor, casimir, caspian, cazimir, cephas, chain, chase, claude, clawde, claws, corvin, crimson, crow, crowley, crush, cymph, cynthia, damon, daemon, daimion, daxten, daze, decay, delyth, dez, dizzy, dominique, dorian, dragomir, dread, drusilla, dryden, ebony, echo, edge, eldritch, electra, elisabat, elspeth, espen, esther, evan, exequiel, eza, ezekiel, felyx, flick, gabriel, gerard, ghost, gloom, gore, grave, grey, grimoire, grotesque, hatchet, havoc, hawthorn, heathen, hellebore, hemlock, hyde, ida, ingram, ink, isidora, jaqueline, jax, jaws, jaz, jazper, jekyll, jet, jett, kane, kaerix, kier, killian, knox, lament, lennox, lestat, lilith, lothaire, luce, luther, lux, lydia, lysander, maddox, maeve, marietta, maw, mercy, midnight, miles, moon, morgan, morgana, mortem, myth, myst, mystery, neechee, noir, nox, neutrix, nuisance, odessa, octave, octavia, octavius, omen, onyx, pandora, percival, phantom, phoenix, pierce, poe, quill, quince, rabid, ramona, raphael, rave, raven, rawre, raze, razors, reaper, rhaenyra, rin, rip, rogue, ronan, ruby, rumor, rune, sabbath, sabien, salem, sangue, sardonyx, scarlet, scream, sebastien, selene, shade, shadow, shred, silas, skrrt, skull, smoke, snap, spine, spike, spirit, strange, sting, stray, tear, temperance, thane, thorn, thrash, theramin, umbra, valentine, valerian, vamperine, vane, vance, vermillion, vesper, victoria, viktor, viktoria, ville, vincent, vispan, vivienne, volitaire, vollo, wild, wryn, xander, xanthos, xavian, xavier, xenia, yarrow, yuma, yvette, zaye, zayne, zedar, zee, zev, zeke, zim, zion, zypher

Pronouns: vampire/vampires, bat/bats, wing/wings, cave/caves, echo/echos, smoke/smokes, cloud/clouds, soar/soars, swoop/swoops, flight/flights, night/nights, dark/darks, shade/shades, shadow/shadows, moon/moons, wisp/wisps, fang/fangs, gleam/gleams, shine/shines, glimmer/glimmers, drain/drains, sink/sinks, thrill/thrills, sharp/sharps, drip/drips, drop/drops, heart/hearts, beat/beats, life/lifes, immortal/immortals, cold/colds, chill/chills, vein/veins, glass/glass', swirl/swirls, goblet/goblets, chalice/chalices, castle/castles, forest/forests, silent/silents, alone/alones, silver/silvers, stake/stakes, cross/cross', hiss/hiss', sun/suns, scorch/scorchs, hide/hides, cloak/cloaks, ruffle/ruffles, frill/frills, lace/laces, parasol/parasols, velvet/velvets, scarlet/scarlets, ruby/rubys, obsidian/obsidians, onyx/onyxs, mirror/mirrors, crack/cracks, void/voids, mystery/mysterys, candle/candles, petal/petals, rose/roses, thorn/thorns, puddle/puddles, pool/pools, ash/ashs, ashes/ashes', crow/crows, raven/ravens, vulture/vultures, corvid/corvids, morbid/morbids, dark/darks, brood/broods, extreme/extremes, pain/pains, blur/blurs, flicker/flickers, fire/fires, fuse/fuses, spark/sparks, lighter/lighters, smoke/smokes, heart/hearts, crackle/crackles, key/keys, sharp/sharps, smash/smashs, shatter/shatters, break/breaks, crimson/crimsons, sneak/sneaks, night/nights, scream/screams, threat/threats, swear/swears, splatter/splatters, red/reds, empty/emptys, spike/spikes, riot/riots, loud/louds, rage/rages, teeth/teeths, reject/rejects, checker/checkers, stripe/stripes, smudge/smudges, polish/polishs, eyeliner/eyeliner, raccoon/raccoons, music/musics, drown/drowns, note/notes, scribble/scribbles, headbang/headbangs, bracelet/bracelets, mumble/mumbles, mutter/mutters, zero/zeros, razor/razors, rawr/rawrs, die/dies, dead/deads, gloom/glooms, tear/tears, sob/sobs, curl/curls, 🦷, 🫀, 🫁, 🐦‍⬛, 🕷️, 🕸️, 🌑, 🌪️, 🦴, 🎧, 🎼, 🎸, 📱, 💿, 📷, 📞, 🎵, 🎙️, ⏳, 🔦, ⛓️, ⛓️‍💥, 🧨, 🪓, 🔪, 🗡️, 🪦, ⚰️, 🕳️, 🩹, 🩸, 🗝️, 🗑️, 🖋️, ✂️, ❤️‍🩹, 💢, 🎶, 🔇, 🗯️

Titles: prn who sleeps upside down, the cave dweller, the one who used manic panic, prn who hides in the night, prn who lurks in the shadows, the one scribbling in their notebook, the bloodsucker, the count, prns blood-filled chalice, the countess, prn who sleeps in a coffin, prn who is obsessed with death, prn who longs for the sun, the undying creature, prn who has raccoon tails, prn who is listening to [favorite band], prn with the skinny jeans, prns bloodied dagger, prn who shops at hot topic, the vampire cursed with immortality, prn texting on prns flip phone, the one with the emo bangs, prn who terrifies, the music listener, prn who has prns headphones in, part of the emo cult, prn who fears the sun, the vegan vampire, the one with the vampiric cloak, the wielder of parasols, the bloodless body, prn who lies in the darkness, the immortal soul, the thing with fangs, the one wearing the fingerless gloves, the one covered in chains, the empty emo, prn who sizzles in the sun, prn of sinister magic, prns infinite disdain, the dead thing, the unbeating heart, prn who stares out the window, the exhausted vampire, the one who lurks in graveyards, prn with the bat wings, prns doodled-on converse, the fluttering bat, prn with skeletons in prns closet, the friendly vampire, prn with razor sharp fangs, prn who shrouds prnself in shadow, dead on the scene, prn who stays alone, the strange, prn who shreds on prns guitar, the dhampir, the lost, prn who drains life from the living, the being with visible veins, the stitched heart, the one with too many studded belts, the bloodied bat, prns empty playlist, prn who haunts, prn who likes emily the strange, the friendless, lurks the graves, thing of nightfall, prn who is filled with misery, the vampyr, prns immortal soul, prn with smudged eyeliner, the crying thing, the one blasting music through prns headphones, prn who is not a poser, prn with no reflection, the one who shatters mirrors, prn who turns into a bat

[minecraft]

(intentionally left out pillagers/golems from this list. also let's be honest, they're probably adding penguins anyway)

[phoenixcatch7]

Just finished oracle of ages!!! Good game, good game. I have Thoughts.

I actually really enjoyed the story and characters! I figured going into the oracle games that it'd be a simple, cliché story, not much nuance or depth, and with Seasons that's basically what I got: din gets fridged in a crystal at the start of the game -> go get her -> you need a set of maguffins to do so -> fight big monster.

Admittedly it was the first game, which meant less story, but even if I hadn't linked (heh) the games for extra end game content Ages just did so much more.

Unlike din, naryu has someone else willing to help her. Ralph (the twinkiest twink to ever twink) was a young man who was her devoted friend (there was a weird crush triangle thing going on with him, Link and naryu, I always felt like I was missing subtext) and, spoilers for a 20yo game?? I guess?

He was the dethroned descendant of the ancient queen Ami. His family definitely still have big money though. He was pretty clearly supposed to be a comic relief character with a twist, but I ended up really liking him! He was over enthusiastic and over confident, but not unintelligent, a decent swordsman (I think) who was incredibly loyal to his friends and held some deep rooted responsibility for the people his family used to rule. Kind, determined, good with kids and people in general, he was terrified but willing to sacrifice his very existence to save the people.

The world building was also great! I don't think I've ever played a zelda game without gorons, but hylians were in short supply. To be expected outside of hyrule, I guess? Anyway, there were also lizard people on an island (tokay!) whose entire deal was.. A bit outdated? Rude, brazen and aggressive to outsiders, they lived in crude huts, worshipped things they didn't quite understand and were generally the old Hollywood stereotype of an isolated jungle tribe.

There was also, like, zora racism? There's a zora village underwater, and one of them was like 'us sea zora are nothing like those river zora 😒' which handily solved both my question of if the river/ocean zora divide was canon or fanon and the relationships between the two. Are they even the same species?? It just makes the rito even weirder but hey lmao. In all honesty I was pretty sick of the river zora at that point too, I swear there were two of them popping up in every screen that had even a sliver of water deeper than the knees and they CONSTANTLY shot fireballs istg they were such a pain. They were literally everywhere and so hard to kill.

On the plus side mermaid suit ^u^!! A dungeon item (the mermaids cave), the item had a desc like 'the skin of the mythical beast' which raised SO many more questions than it answered. The zora were delighted to see a young mermaid! The use of 'maid' implied either a) the zora all thought link was a girl and he didn't correct them (eyo genderqueer androgeny) b) the zora don't subscribe to gender the way humans do (eyo genderqueer androgeny) or c) all fish people look like mermaids regardless of their specific gender (eyo genderqueer androgeny). It literally could have been all three who knows. Maybe one day we'll actually meet a mermaid in zelda.

Also, there's a mini game in Seasons, which I played first, the subrosian dance. It's a pretty popular part of their culture, it's got music, it's got professional dancers. In Ages, you find the gorons doing the exact same dance! Rosa, a subrosian performer you meet in Seasons, is also there, saying her people's dance is better (tbf it is), but if you go to the past you'll find the gorons actually invented the dance first, as part of their love of games and entertainment, and you can talk to two subrosians who are talking about bringing the dance home! It's so interesting to see little details like this, where the travelling subrosians visited their fellow cave dweller lava eating people centuries ago, brought it back home where it exploded in popularity and centuries later became refined as a whole folk dance with spinning and everything, with the people forgetting where it came from, where the gorons keep their dance exactly the same (having to do a rhythm game without rhythm is hard).

Actually, there was so much political fantasy drama going on in the past?? Like, you've got the childless queen taking care of her people, a budding village and a few more settlements across the kingdom. Early in her reign she tried to build a tower to act as a beacon to her fiancé lost at sea, which is a romance story all on its own, but it was cut short (maybe because of funding?). Centuries in the future, it's just ruins. You've got people living on an ACTIVE VOLCANO starting a symmetry cult around a artifact called 'tuni nut' which, presumably, stabilises the volcano? And it's entirely cut off from the outside world. The goron elder is crushed under rocks and their economy is failing. The zora king got poisoned and he's about to die without an heir because a witch turned the fairy queen into an octorock, but the man in charge of the only cure refuses to hand it over until someone passes his tests.

Most of it is solved relatively easily by link and a copious amount of time travel, but the thing with the ruling queen only gets worse. When the evil witch invades the kingdom, she possesses the oracle of ages, naryu (who's a little implied to be the Actual Creation Goddess Naryu reincarnated) and travels back to the past to bring about an age of despair in the present. She does this by slipping into the royal court and befriending the queen as a serving girl, rising up the ranks to become her closest advisor and corrupting her (pretty sure mind control magic is used a li'l). She convinces her to restart the black tower project, pouring all of her and the towns resources into it - forcibly conscripting every able bodied worker and working them to the bone, all while monsters start to circle the tower. With all the fear and resentment, it quickly becomes a beacon of dark energy, a perfect focal point to perform black magics.

Link (and Ralph) end up in the past and get hauled in front of the queen, with possessed naryu at her side, who basically jeers at them and ensures the queen won't listen to their untrustworthy lies. The townsfolk are getting increasingly stressed as their village fills with rubble and their men are worked to the point of collapse. Armed guards start to appear to keep the workers under control. Eventually, Ralph uncovers a hole in the guard rotation, and he and link sneak into the palace through a secret entrance Ralph oh so casually knows about. Link and naryu fight, but with stupendous timing the queen walks in to see naryu collapsed on the floor, Link standing over her with a sword. She calls for the guards, but before anyone can react, the witch, banished form her first vessel, leaps into the queen herself instead. Ralph shoves past the arriving guards and into naryus arms, while link moves in from of them. The queen orders the guards to attack, but naryu, reawakened, pulls them back to the present in the nick of time. In the present, the black tower is magically growing, reaching higher and higher into the sky, terrifying the people of the city.

Then! Ralph, who at this point is suspiciously invested now his actual goal is completed and naryu is safe, vows to go back into time again, away from naryu, to live under the now evil queen and bring protection and comfort to the villagers as a direct act of resistance, because the witch is feeding on their sorrow to power an unknown ritual (link knows. Link, canonically, has told nobody). So this teen in fancy robes and cape goes back to the oppressed, poverty stricken town under the thumb if someone who wants him dead and lives there for weeks if not months dedicating himself to supporting the village and bringing people's hopes and spirits back up, presumably while living out of someone else's wooden hut. In the middle of a literal depression inducing miasma that's sapping everyone's joy and will to live.

That just. Takes insane strength of character. That's a feat of pure, distilled, compassion as anarchy.

Link's off bouncing between past and present doing dungeons and solving easier issues through either sword or magic item, but Ralph is out here doing the long hard slog for little reward.

Link finally returns to the black tower completed, affecting even the people of the present, and, preparations complete, rushes to the past. Ralph is nowhere be seen. Talking to the villagers reveals several have a crush on him, but an old man saw him running for the tower, sword drawn. There's a man pacing by the entrance, who saw the kid run in, tried to stop him. He said Ralph said that he no longer cared what happened to him. That the man realised that Ralph had quietly succumbed to the same curse of despair they all were under. Link fights his way up to the top of the tower, where Ralph confronts the evil queen, sword at her heart, but every step she takes into it, he steps back. The witch laughs. She asks him if he's really willing to write himself out of existence - being the queens descendant, and all. Ralph leaps back, into links chest. He's shaking and stuttering, but he lunges, and is knocked out in one blow. The queen now asks link the same question: is he willing to erase Ralph? If he strikes her, kills her, the queen will die, childless, and he will never live. She leaves, and link rushes to Ralph. He's awake but unresponsive, defeated. With a heavy heart, Link leaves him to chase the queen. It's naryu who finds him, brings him out of the tower.

When the witch is defeated, the curse is lifted, and Ralph is once more energetic and kind. He's a little quieter now, though, sticking close to naryu. For all he was a loud and headstrong kid, I gotta say I was very impressed.

He would have made a good king.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 22/03/2024

Viva La LOWAS

Season 7 Featured on: The Year of Grand Dad Sound Selection [Side B]

Ripped by Cosmic199X

Requested by literallyn01imp0rtant! (Request Form)

I'd like to very much thank literallyn01imp0rtant for suggesting a bevvy of Homestuck rips for me to cover, but also apologize in advance - despite being a Tumblr user and overall internet dweller, I'm actually still very unfamiliar with the series. Not that I'm disinterested, far from it - if anything, the recent influx in new rips from the series has only made me more interested in getting into the series now in 2024. But even watching from a distance, it's been fascinating to see Homestuck's presence on SiIvaGunner from the early years to now - with Viva La LOWAS leading the charge for a new age of rips of the series.

See, while the channel was starting out in the early Seasons, there was a real sort of commitment to only ripping video games on the channel. That is still something that is *mostly* adhered to nowadays - for instance, rips like A Day In The Snow or Remember when this song was the one related to toilets? will still use the Rock Band and Guitar Hero games as sources despite the songs featured obviously not originating there. But the same also applied to Homestuck, as most of the franchise's music used for rips were assigned to the official, episodic, now-effectively-cancelled Homestuck adventure game, HiveSwap. Like it was for me, it was likely a bit confusing for those out of the loop - unless you gave the key art's main characters a second look, the name and artwork don't really jump out as you as "Homestuck" right away. But now with HiveSwap effectively dead in the water, and SiIvaGunner's adherence to only ripping "real" games being far looser, a change occurred on October 24th 2023 - "retconning" all Homestuck rips to have been part of a series-specific playlist. There was even a cool little announcement made that provided a lore-accurate reason to the change having been done, referencing both Homestuck itself and the early parts of SiIva Season 2 - that's the kind of channel-and-lore harmony that I raved so much about in Haltmanna feat. Rob Thomas of Matchbox 20.

There's a lot to love about the original Doctor theme from Homestuck, with a magical sound eerie reminiscent of Cave Story (which was confirmed as being a major influence to it by the track's late composer). With Viva La LOWAS being made six years and a month after the fact, I can't exactly say it was made in tribute to her passing - yet arranging Viva La Vida of all tracks in this melancholy chiptune sound still just feels so befitting. The combination fits like a glove throughout the whole arrangement and gives the rip an equal amount of hope and hopelessness, a sense of bittersweet acceptance, and many more emotions that the original Viva La Vida already instilled into people way back when. As a huge fan of both the song itself and of Cave Story's music (see Balcony Fusion Collab), Viva La LOWAS hits hard for me even without the context Homestuck itself provides for it. The fact that this rip led the way for all future Homestuck rips to follow, free from HiveSwap's shackles and finally able to champion Homestuck itself, only amplifies those feelings. And so this elegantly simple arrangement is able to mean so much at once despite it all.

Here's to more Homestuck, and here's to me one day finally reading it.

[ripeteeth]

“All painting is cave painting; painting on the low dark walls of you and me, intimations of grandeur. The painted church is the tattooed body of Christ, not bound into religion, but unbound out of love. Love, the eloquent shorthand that volumes out those necessary invisibles of faith and optimism, humour and generosity, sublimity of mankind made visible through art.

Naked I came into the world, but brush strokes cover me, language raises me, music rhythms me. Art is my rod and staff, my resting place and shield, and not mine only, for art leaves nobody out. Even those from whom art has been stolen away by tyranny, by poverty, begin to make it again. If the arts did not exist, at every moment, someone would begin to create them, in song, out of dust and mud, and although the artifacts might be destroyed, the energy that creates them is not destroyed. If, in the comfortable West, we have chosen to treat such energies with scepticism and contempt, then so much the worse for us. Art is not a little bit of evolution that late-twentieth-century city dwellers can safely do without. Strictly, art does not belong to our evolutionary pattern at all. It has no biological necessity. Time taken up with it was time lost to hunting, gathering, mating, exploring, building, surviving, thriving. Odd then, that when routine physical threats to ourselves and our kind are no longer a reality, we say we have no time for art.”

Jeanette Winterson, Art Objects: Essays on Ecstasy and Effrontery

[just-someone-who-likes-to-write]

...Story Imagine...

((Another K'uk'ulkan/Namor story Imagine. Reverse little mermaid AU))

K'uk'ulkan would always patrols near the surface just to keep on eye for any surface dwellers who might get too curious of what's beneath the waters. During one of those patrols, he saw a ship that lous music and laughter came from. He immediately knew it was just surface dwellers celebrating whatever. It wasn't the first time he saw such thing, but what caught his attention was the beautiful woman standing by the side looking to the horizon. She looked bored... almost sad. He didn't know he was getting closer until he could hear old man's voice telling the beautiful lady to stay away from the edge.

He thought that would be the last time he saw her, but then he saw her again. It was a daytime, and she was in a small boat with a sail that she was controlling by herself. And K'uk'ulkan doubted his eyes of what he saw.

It was the same woman, but she looked different. She wasn't wearing a colourful dress but simple pants and shirt like the men he saw, she didn't have the look of boredom but a big smile as her eyes shined against the sun light, but what caught his attention the most was how she was managing the boat by herself with such raw excitement and energy. She would lean to the edge with her whole body having nothing to secure her to the boat but a rope that she held with her hand, and then talk to the sea as if it was an old friend of hers.

As he watched from a far, the serpent king was intrigued by the woman wanting to know more of her, that's when he remembered the name she was called by, (Y/n).

Almost every few days, (Y/n) would come with her boat and sail the sea, challenging the high waves, ignoring the waters that the sea throws back at her, taking with a big smile and a sincere laughter. He did get braver in getting closer to the boat without her noticing, and because of her habit of talking to the sea, he learned a lot about her.

(Y/n) was the princess of the people near the shore. She loved the sea, but her family was overprotective of her, so they tried to appease her desire by setting parties on large boats when she wanted to be near the sea to touch it and sail fast through it. Knowing they won't approve of her wishes, she would sneak out alone and sail on her own.

And the more he was around her, the more he got attached and would get forward for her visits.

K'uk'ulkan became her secret companion, he would stick close to the boat where he knows she won't notice or see him, and when she would challenge a wave that was too much for her he would get behind the boat and push it forward so it would flip and for her to fall. He enjoyed her screams of excitement and joyful laughter.

One day, however, when K'uk'ulkan was waiting for her, he noticed dark clouds coming near, which means there will be a storm coming, so he belived that his secret princess won't be coming. But he was wrong when Namora came to his saying she saw a boat floating near their territory, The king moved so fast, leaving his lieutenant confused, but she followed him.

K'uk'ulkan's mind was filled with worry as he kept assuring himself that it couldn't be her, that it must be a fishing boat or a lost one, anything else but her. But to his horror it was her, and how did he know?

Her unconscious body was floating in the water, her boat's broken pieces scattered around her. But wasting no more time The king sped towards her and took her to the neatest cave, Namora following close, growing even more confused as she saw her king lay the woman gently on the surface of the stone floor of the cave as he did his best to remove the water from her lungs. Her king face filled with so much worry and fear that she had never seen before. She wanted to help, but all she could do was set back and watch.

The serpent King felt relieved as he saw his princess throw up the water as she tried to breathe again. He whispered comfort words to her and assured her that she was safe. (Y/n) looked at his with drowsy eyes at her saviour, she tried to talk as she looked into his dark eyes but she lost consciousness again falling into his arms, and instead of laying her back down, K'uk'ulkan kept her in his embrace finding the feeling of her breathing and safe bringing him comfort. He always watched her from a far way, but to have her so close that he was able to wrap his arms around her felt...so right.

She was safe, she was protected, she was with him.

Seeing the scene in front of her, Namora approached her king and confronted him of what was happening. He hesitated but then confessed what he was doing in the past couple of months.

"You have feelings for her?"

Even though she made it sound like a question, K'uk'ulkan knew it was more of a statement. He said nothing as he kept holding his sleeping princess, waiting for the storm to calm before returning her back.

As he laid her in the sand gently, with Namora watching not too far away, the king found it difficult to just leave but as he saw people coming from a far he hurried back to the sea hiding behind a rock with Namora refusing to leave until her made sure (Y/n) was safe. The men turned up to be guards looking for her, and they made sure she was breathing before taking her back to her castle.

K'uk'ulkan watched the scene with sadness as he wished he was there by her side to take care of her until she awakes, but he was afraid of how she would react to him, to who he was, what he was and where he is from. But one thing he was sure about is that he probably won't ever find out because after this incident, her father would keep her away from the sea to protect her from any future harm to herself.

During their journey back to Talokan, Namora followed her king, saying nothing, for she didn't know what to say she never saw him like that. Yes, he did experience sadness for his people, but this was different.

"Why don't you go to her." She suggested, breaking the silence in the cave.

He at first laughed thinking the idea absurd and too dangerous. But she reminded him that aside from his ears and wings, he looked a lot like a human.

"Why so suddenly?" He asked suspiciously." You hate land dwellers."

"I do." She answered. "But I care for you more, and you deserve to be happy with the one you love."

"But that's just it. I don't know if the feelings I have for her are truly love or just deep care."

"Then go and meet her, spend time with her, see how you feel then. It's better than just giving up and wondering what might have been later on."

"But Talokan-"

" I can look after them for a few days until you are ready to be back."

He didn't agree immediately, deciding to think more on it, almost every day he'd go to the same rock he hid behind last time and look at the far castle as if hoping to see glimpse of her. Time passed, and during one of his visits, he finally saw her. She was wearing a simple dress and a cloak to hide herself but he already knew it was her, but she wasn't alone. (Y/n) was looking around frantically as if looking for something she lost.

"My princess, we need to go back before his highness realises you were gone. He he found out that you came to the beach without his consent again he'll be very upset."

"But I need to find him, Aneka."

"With all do respect, you swallowed a lot of salt water, and it probably made you imagine this "Saviour" of yours-"

"I DIDN'T IMAGINE HIM!" (Y/n) screamed at her gaurd in frustration. She took a deep breath before continuing. "Listen, I know I was wrong to go during that storm, but I am SURE of it that I didn't just wash up the shore. There was a man who saved, I looked into his eyes, I heard his voice, I even felt his arms around me.... I'm not crazy, Aneka, I know he is real."

"Princess..." her gaurd looked at her with pity as if she truly wanted to believe her but couldn't.

"I'm not crazy, and I will find him."

(Y/n) stated firmly before continuing walking around the beach with her gaurd still trying to convince her to go back. K'uk'ulkan couldn't believe what he heard. She was looking for him, she wanted to see him. With this, the king went back to his cave where Namora was.

"Are you truly able to manage everything while I'm away?"

This made Namora laugh before assuring him again that she could. And then she went to help him set a plan on how he would go about it.

When night fell, he and Namora sneaked into the town in secret and "borrowed" some clothes that they believed would be proper for a surface dweller. The clothes were not as luxurious as his princess's were, but they were enough to cover the wings on his ankle and a Head-Warp to cover the top of his ears, but her refusedto take his piercings off for it was part of his cultureand identity.

It was simple, wait in the beach for her, talk to her, know her more, meet her people and kingdom and if things were alright tell her the truth of who he truly was and see her reaction.

K'uk'ulkan thought he would be composed and would make a good first impression to her. He didn't expect the first impression through fighting with her guard that came to the beach before her princess. He could have sent the woman flying with one simple swing of his hand or even broke her weapon into half, but he remembered Namora's continues advice of hiding his true strength, so he continued to dodge her attacks and blocking her kicks and punches. The warrior didn't stop until she came.

"ANEKA STOP!"

The warrior halted and implored the princess to stay back, but she wasn't listening, for she was looking at him with wide eyes, the same eyes we was silently begging to look at him. He thought he would be composed when meeting her, that he would smoothly introduce himself to charm her. But when her eyes met his, he didn't expect the great fear and anxiety to build in him. He almost just turned around and jumped back into the water.

(Y/n) manoeuvred around the warrior who tried to hold her back in order to get closer to him. She got to his face like the time she woke in the cave before losing consciousness and was analysing his face. K'uk'ulkan could feel his heart hammering inside of his chest as he kept calm, then a smile broke on her face.

"It's you!"

She stated and quickly held his hand by instinct and held it up before turning to the warrior.

"This is Him!!"

"Him?" Reapted the warrior suspiciously. "That's your imaginary saviour?"

"He is not imaginary. He is right here." she turned to him with pleading look. "Please tell her."

The king could see the hint of tear threatening to escape her eyes, and he refused to allow them to fall. He smiled down at her, and he cupped her cheek.

"It was really dangerous for you to sail during a storm, but I am happy to see you well again, my princess."

He said as he took her hand that held his and kissed the back of her hand, making her blush. Their moment was cut short by Aneka, who pulled the princess behind her again and pointed her weapon at him, (Y/n) tried to stop her but her gaurd wouldn't budge and insisted that he be brought in front of the king and he agreed.

When he stood in front of the royal family, K'uk'ulkan explained his practised lie. He was a prince from the country across the sea. He also made the wrong mistake of sailing during the storm, and it drifted again the harsh waves and led him to their part of the sea where he saw as the princess's boat crashed and her sink into the water, that the reason why he wasn't around when they found her was because he was afraid that his presence would be mistaken for trespassing, so he hid away and only left when he made sure that she was found. Confessing how the reason he was back was because he wanted to see the princess again and make sure she was in good health.

Hearing this, the king was delighted and hugged K'uk'ulkan, which made the serpent king stiff as he was not used to such gestures.

"Thank you so much for saving my sweet daughter, Prince....uh.. my apologies I was so focused that you were real and not a hallucination and forgot to ask for your name."

"Papa!!" (Y/n) almost yelled in embarrassment by her father's teasing.

"My Name is .... Namor, you can call me Namor."

K'uk'ulkan didn't know why he gave them the name for his enemies, but he felt that in order for him to go and come undetected, he needed to give fake fake background and a fake name.

Feeling the need to pay back a debt, the king invited him to stay in his country as long as he likes and to never hesitate to ask for anything. He takes advantage of that to spend more time with his princess and get to know her more intimately and for her to finally know him.

Meanwhile, there are those who are not really as happy with the situation. The Queen mother and her other daughter Shuri we very suspicious of the "Prince", the Crown Prince was also on high alert but he doesn't show it and treats the Prince with respect, for in the end he did save his sister. And back in Talokan, Attuma asked Namora where their king was, and she confessed to him of his whereabouts, for he too was the king's lieutenant, and he was not happy that their king would probably a surface dweller for a queen and more that he was kept in the dark about it.

So the story will go with K'uk'ulkan trying to woe the woman he loves while other parties would try to sabotage his attempts or make it more difficult.

[cbk1000]

Anyway, here's some more of the sequel to the vet fic, because the world is hard and mean, and one overly long fic about two gays driving around the countryside helping sick animals wasn't enough:

The wedding was at Ripley Castle near Harrogate, and featured a cousin with whom Arthur was just close enough not to blow off the ceremony; though he wouldn’t have minded simply popping in for the vows, and the requisite after-vow pleasantries. But he had seen the opportunity to pry Merlin away for a holiday, on an estate large enough to avoid most of his family; and so Saturday they had put their rucksacks, their suits, and themselves, into the car, and were now going at a decent clip down the B6265, though Merlin thought it was codgerly.

“Does Gaius know to put the wet food on top of the dry food for Tessa, and not to mix it all together?”

“Yes, you mentioned it in the instructions we left.”

“And that Mixer can only go into the outdoor pens with George? And if he can’t find Cian, to check under the sofa?”

“Arthur, we are not leaving our infant child for the first time whilst we take our first holiday since we became new dads, we are leaving our four adult cats to be checked in on by a veterinarian who’s been practising about as long as either of us has been alive. I think he can handle feeding a finicky arshole.”

“I’m not sure if I remembered to mention George’s eye drops, though. Will you text Gaius?”

“You wrote six fucking pages on how to care for four cats for two days. You mentioned it.”

“Just text him, you knob.”

“Uncle Gaius,” Merlin sounded out obnoxiously as he typed. “Arthur thinks you are a helpless, blind old useless bat, and would like to reiterate how to feed a cat and administer eye drops.”

Arthur swiped blindly at his head with one hand, whilst the other he left planted on the wheel. “Should I text Morgana too, and have her check in on Gaius checking in on the cats?”

“Piss off.”

“Too bad she was too sick to come; I’d love to see Gwaine mixing it up with your relatives. Nobody would even notice you’re gay if Morgana had brought him.”

“Yes, I’m sure that would have gone well for everyone.”

Then Merlin changed the radio station, and they had a friendly dust-up, most of the remaining drive to Ripley, over the other’s objectively inferior taste in music; so that when they pulled up at The Boar’s Head where they would be staying, Arthur had almost forgot he was inevitably to see his father. Now the courtyard full of Pendragons brought it surging down on him, and he felt suddenly as overwhelmed as if they had converged on instead of glancingly glanced at the car. His whole body tightened; and the dread clash was in his chest, that brutal striving for life which in a fit man at an elevation the same as his native seems to herald the onset of death. He felt in the car in the middle of the day with no threat present but the threat of unpleasantness that he was carrying his doom. It was in his chest, where his breath had shortened, and quickened; all those impulses of the lizard brain which kept the cave dweller from being no more than some leftovers in his loincloth now were telling him that he would need to flee some pensioners in some church wear. His father was nowhere amongst them; but the possibility of him, the infinite possibility of if, was all round the car and beyond the car, where anything might happen to his heart.

And then Merlin said in the same voice he used with the animals, “Tell me five things you can see right now.”

“The steering wheel. My hand on the steering wheel. The door handle. The chip in the windshield. Your knee.”

“Five things you can feel?”

“The steering wheel under my hand. The seat under my legs. The air from the vents. The seat against my back. The steering wheel under my hand.”

“Five things you can hear?”

“Your breathing, your abysmal taste in music, the car engine, faint music outside the car, talking outside the car.”

“Four things you can see?”

And he walked him through the exercise like that, till they had got down to one item for each, and Arthur’s breathing was calmer. He flexed his stiff fingers on the steering wheel.

“It’ll be ok, Arthur. And if it’s not, I’ll headbutt some people, and we’ll leave.”

“Ok.” Arthur wiped his palms on his jeans.

Then they were out of the car, and Merlin said to the few friendly guests who found their arrival more interesting than their breakfast, “Hey; nice to meet you. Merlin. Really sorry, we’ll be down in a few minutes, yeah, I just need the loo really badly. Down from Emberford, yeah,” ushering Arthur through the crowd and into the Inn as deftly as he had ever done anything requiring motor skills. He had got the suits and the rucksacks out of the backseat, and kept himself now with their luggage between Arthur and any intrusives, using his dimples to plough a kind of furrow through to reception, so that everyone in his wake felt that they had been charmed instead of slighted. 

In their room he threw down the suits and bags on the bed, and said, “It’s nice. Not very castle-y, though. Do you want me to make you some tea?”

“No. We should probably go back down and mingle for a bit before we need to change.”

“Do you want me to blow you?”

“That’s--” Arthur paused. He did not know what part of ‘go down and mingle’ Merlin had confused for a sex act; but now that he had Arthur’s brain had got just as muddled. He separated out, after a moment, what he wanted to say, from what his penis wanted him to say. “What part of ‘I probably shouldn’t pause long enough for tea’ suggested to you that I thought we had time for sex before going back down to visit with the other wedding guests?”

[cavedwellermusic]

Cemetery Filth - Senses of Detriment (2024)

Tom Hanno of Tom's Reviews looks at Senses of Detriment, the new album from Atlanta OSDM act Cemetery Filth, released August 16th on Rotted Life.

Recent times have found me in a Death Metal vibe, as evidenced by my recent Inscribed review, as well as my interview with their incredibly talented bassist, Evie Austin. Thanks to discovering that band, I was also turned onto another project that Evie is involved in, Atlanta, Georgia’s Cemetery Filth, an OSDM act that just released a brand new album Senses Of Detriment.

Listen to the album and read the full review:

[heritage-harmony-records]

NEW ALBUM STREAMING NOW!!!

Arcana Luna Liquor is the latest album from Lima, Peru based gothic / avant-garde / operatic black metal artist Arcana Luna. Released August 26, 2024.

Listen to the full album on our YouTube channel at the link below or in our bio:

[imperatornt]

"The first thing I found out in Markarth is that Skyrim makes strange mer even out of the best Thalmor. I'm not saying that we're all aprax or ousters; what I mean is that I soon started to feel the need to throw myself into a tavern after my shift. To warm up, yes; but also for the horrible food and the disgusting, flavourless wine. I even started to enjoy the childish, cave-dweller-styled music of the locals. It all helped fending off the cold."

"My comrades joined me at times, but they were more displeased than I was with the brutish, pitiful local company. In the end, even my faithful Breviarco stopped following me after work, and that was when I ended up with more alone time in my hands than I was supposed to."

"I was curious, impatient, hungry, far from home and irritatingly self-assured. And, oddly enough, I thought I was being watched."

Diary of Velendomis of Dusk, 4E 201-205 5 3 First

[shattered-realm-twisted-reality]

PART TWO: Thoxa’s Voice

(This is the beginning of Thoxa's tale, her links with the wider world of SRTR, and the beginning of a great adventure for a small wanna-be idol! Please forgive any spelling/grammar issues, I'm not the best editor!) From an early age there had always been a rumor, a passed down story that was still believed within the little community in the Crystal Caverns. Everyone had some sort of taint from the Crystals all around them. The goblins had adapted best of all being the first of the cave dwellers. They knew the magic in the shining walls. Crystal Goblins as they were now called, had been the first because of their mysterious ancestor bringing her family here and raising them within the caverns and their wealth of resources and safety within the large network of cave systems, spread worldwide.

“Fae folk created the caverns,” Graying sparkling goblin grandmas would whisper by the hearth at night. “There was a great war among them, as humanity began to crawl out of its cradle. They created a twin world, a shining realm—but their conflict shattered it. It’s said the magic collapsed into the Earth, spreading like a virus through the Underground.” Wide eyed listeners would admire the formations all around them, the gently glowing cyan and pink and every color in between. Pulsing with life, with ancient power that worked in unpredictable ways. Another rumor about these mysterious Fae was far more substantial when those who explored outside the caves came back with tales about a mysterious forest at the base of the mountain. It was a beautiful and confusing place, and no matter what the weather was, the closer they got to it the warmer and more spring-like it became, and the sun would seem to set. This was enough to deter most: they needed to get home before dark. If they ventured on, they’d begin to find structures that seemed to be made of crystals: great cracked pillars shining stories high, or crumbling walls and roads. Eventually though, before they could explore further, the outsiders would feel dizzy and then return to their original path, the forest now behind them.

“It has to be Fae folk, still out there. No other kin or kind can do such tricks.” The elders of the caves would say among one another, shaking their heads. “Best to steer clear, it’s more than we can understand.”

These rumors are the mysteries of the Underground, the world Thoxa has always known. Born to simple farming folk in the Southern Reaches of the Caverns, she was eagerly independent from a young age, knowing that someday the tunnels could lead her to new and exciting places, much like that ancient ancestor learned. The rumors of fae, of the magic, of course always fascinated her–she loved the glittering power of the crystals, how they took her over from a young age, growing from her smooth skin, little glowing gems. Even her stretch marks seemed to show she was a glowing crystal herself, cracking over her glowing skin like a geode. “Built-In Glam!” She’d call it, also obsessed with any little trinket about pop stars, idols, as well as fashion and music of all kinds. She began to learn the tunnels around her home well, making friends and exploring the Above, usually little suburban neighborhood dumps where she could find discarded CD’s and tapes, ripped clothes and out of style magazines. Her glowing skin and eyes made these trips work best at night, when they aided her in searching for her treasures. She’d make herself little shows in abandoned small caves, bending over tees to bedazzle them and lip syncing to decades old Britney. When she reached maturity, these girlish fantasies never seemed to die along with the rest of her childhood dreams. Eventually Thoxa was on her own, packing her things and setting off to live further into the mountains, finding some friendly locals to share a home with for protection’s sake, and because well–life is lonely in the Underground without some cavemates.

It was this same mountain that those who explored Above said the Fae Forest was. When she heard that, she became excited–glittering faeries were another childhood dream of sorts, but the forest alone sounded beautiful. Whole towers of crystal? She had to find out for herself. However she was used to striking out at night, so plotted her journey and set out after dusk, her eyes keen on the dark trail. “This way,” She muttered, studying a little hand-drawn map she’d made, based on all that she had researched. Despite the young goblin woman’s silly demeanor, she was rather mature and clever, planning ahead for weeks before setting out. She’d even made sure the weather would be nice, but not too warm. She had to feel the Springtime for herself.

The cave entrance was near the base of the mountain, so thankfully finding her way down the narrow path wasn’t too difficult. Even if some of the steeper drops made her nervous, feet always a bit clumsy. Once at the bottom, she looked around…it was a little hilly landscape, dotted with stands of pine and oak here and there, but not exactly a forest. A landmark–she’d been told that they turned when they reached a big bounder, fallen from the mountain. Which direction, and where the boulder might be, she didn’t know. Gathering a courageous little inhale, she set her repaired hiking boots in the direction of the pines, figuring some trees meant more trees, and the boulder had to roll down straight-ish from the rocky hillside. It felt like hours, going through the nighttime world, on edge to be Above in a still unfamiliar territory.

This wasn’t the quiet Above back home, it was wilderness all around with owls and bats sweeping overhead for their supper, and the slow start of spring frogs chirping from the nearby creek. She saw this world in shades of gray and black, the moon hidden away behind the clouds, but the cave dweller still pressed on, able to clearly see her path and avoid tripping over tree roots. At last a boulder, covered over with moss, called from the right hand side, a big mound in the dark. Rushing over, she put her hand on it with a little laugh, smacking the ancient granite. “HA! Found ya. Now…what next.” She looked around at the trees, closed her eyes, tried to feel the air, get a hint somehow. It was possible she’d find nothing—that the researched stories from old borrowed books and talking with the locals were all too old and the information a true fairy tale now.

Why then did her heart race so much? She was nervous, even fearful of this unfamiliar dark. Biting her lip, she pulled out a cheap set of earbuds, attached to a long outdated Ipod. Music to steady the nerves, but one earbud out and dangling as she made her way towards the old oaks. “B-baby can’t you see, I’m callin’…” She sang nervously under her breath, clutching the map in one hand, her device in the other.

Her feet found a rhythm, a dance, and she began to move forward through the trees, hopeful as they thickened. The music helped, chasing away any spooky vibes with bubblegum stained optimism. She tucked her Ipod into her jacket pocket, shoving the arm up and holding it out as she paused. It was–a little warmer. “Ha, getting’ warmer,” She laughed to herself, and then nearly tripped. Stumbling, she turned to see what had caught her toe–only to gasp at the sight of the biggest single white crystal she’d ever seen, poking casually out of the ground, cracked a little on one side. “Woah.” She crouched, eyes wide as a hand stroked it. “So pretty.” It was still dark, so it glowed like her, but maybe brighter–warmer. It felt warm too, like sunshine had been beating down on it recently. She rose and kept going forward, determined. “I won’t let you turn me away,” She called out in a sing-song. “I know what you wanna do–” She reached into her backpack, taking out a little roll of pink ribbon and a pocket knife. “But I won’t let you confuse me.” She tied a bow around a low branch, and then kept moving. Every few trees, another bow to track her way. If she saw them again ahead, she knew she was being twisted.

However she wasn’t expecting her next find. A great stone and crystal gate–no it was ALL made of the same white quartz, shining and cracked around the edges. Her breath caught and she stopped still, hands tensing at her sides, still carrying the ribbon and map.

“No way…” She reached out, feeling something strange. A sensation that flooded her own emotions, making her fearful of the gate, doubtful of herself. Her hand hesitated before touching it, but when she did it was even warmer. Looking past it, she could see the trees closing in all around, dense and lush, different than before. The air even smelled different, fresher, the hint of nearby running water on the wind. Yet her body seemed to stay still in place, refusing to carry her through the gate. She didn’t have to go through it, she could have gone around—

She smiled to herself. “But that’s not the way we do things, right?” She took another deep breath again and took out her earbuds, tucked the ipod and ribbon into her bag again. All the stories, all the magic simmering in the background of her own existence–here it felt REAL. Like it was undeniable that this gate was purposeful, a trick, a challenge. So she forced her foot forward, with a grunt, then another. “I’m stubborn,” She huffed in defiement. “And too curious. I gotta know why we glow–I gotta know—” She didn’t make sense, she was standing inside the archway now and feeling a wave of dizziness. “It’s a trick,” She huffed, and pushed through. It felt like something sort of gave way, and from one second she was in the chilly forest and the next–someplace entirely. Someplace both beautiful and ruined.

Dusk had settled in, forever. The trees spaced now elegantly and healthy on either side, a cracked and meandering white path dotting through the lush grass under her feet. It was spring, balmy and delightful but not hot. The air smelled like sweet blooms, the sound of a nearby spring burbling away. As she walked, she noticed more cracked crystal, walls, pillars, doorways. Huge shards stuck out here and there, bursting from the soft earth and glowing like sunrise.

“Oh my what a sight.” A little voice chimed out of the tree above, a little blooming maple. Twisting, Thoxa found herself face to face with a little pixie. Dark round eyes shining down from the flowery branches, gossamer lavender and silver hair flowing down around her nude humanoid body, her arms like bird wings with blue and silver opal feathers, her legs feathery and clawed to match.

“I-I could say ditto.” Thoxa finally found her voice, unable to help the uneasy laughter as the little pixie fluttered down, perching on a closer branch as the goblin stepped forward. “What is this place?”

“A place where even the most glittery little goblin should not tread!” Pixie giggled, the sound shrill. “You remind me of a story though. Of a little goblin and a big dragon who live in caves in the mountain. She was shiny too, all ate up by the Glowing.”

“G-glowing, a dragon?!” Thoxa looked around–was this the only faerie here? She was told the Fae all disappeared eons before they knew about them. “H-how…”

“Oh I’ve been here a long time, but this place is frozen in time since—” The Pixie squinted. “Shouldn’t the Veil have turned you back though?”

“I’m guessing that’s the weirdness I felt going through that,” She hooked her thumb at the white archway many yards behind her. The Pixie giggled.

“Oh you are a little fool! Or brave. Or blessed! Who knows. The magic here is wild, returned to Gaia with very few orders in place.”

“I don’t–” Thoxa tried to keep up, not really understanding what the Pixie meant as she suddenly jumped to her feet, fluttering up in front of the goblin’s face.

“Keep going, explore. You might as well—you may never go back to where you came from now!” She giggled as Thoxa’s heart sank with fear, those panicked eyes wide as Pixie whizzed away into the treetops, leaving a little aura of glitter behind her. All around here, there seemed to stir some acknowledgement of her presence–she felt watched.

“I-I can just go back through, right…?” She said, turning—but the archway, the white gate, was gone. Nothing but more cracked towers leaning to one side, crumbling walls. All of it still shining and warm, some covered by moss and vines and wildflowers. A showing of time indeed passing, or simply nature struggling against the ruins. Thoxa moved forward, figuring the Pixie might have been helpful telling her to explore. Maybe something more lay ahead.

And something more did. Over a small hill, she was treated to the sight of an old building, the front walls destroyed entirely, the back and sides crumbling. It revealed the inside like a cracked open dollhouse of what looked to be a once grand room, with colorful stained glass motifs of graceful figures, shattered across their faces. The floor was made of wide tiles, leading up to a platform at the back, shredded tapestries hanging behind what remained of a throne. A creek had dug a path through the room, burbling clean water among the pale soft ruins, moss and grass taking over between the cracks.

As Thoxa drew near, all seemed to grow still and hushed. Her old boots shuffled across the stone, and she felt like she was in a fancy cathedral she had seen in movies, the hole in the ceiling of the place showing the lavender starry sky above. Always dusk. The tapestry shuffled without wind and Thoxa froze in place. “H-hello? I-I’m sorry to have come here–like this,” She began, speaking with uncertainty but compelled to talk to the mysterious chamber around her. “”I’ve always wanted to know–about the magic you know? The crystals have always been around me—they’re inside me.” She touched one stone on her face. “A-and I always thought–the stories of the F-fae were connected, truly. I believed.”

“We are all connected by a greater power,” A smooth delicate voice, not the shrill cry of the Pixie, answered her from behind the throne. A young human-like woman stepped out, as if the air simply breathed her into existence. She was of course taller than the goblin, but still small and willowy, her body clothed in a shift of pearly silk and her hair a shining pale opal–white, then pink, then blue, shifting colors in the dying light of the sun. Her skin even seemed the same, shimmering in a way even the Crystal Goblin’s couldn’t. Her eyes were strange, almost like opals too with no pupil at all. Yet clearly she wasn’t blind as she floated down to Thoxa, tilting her head and smiling a little as Thoxa stepped back. Her movements were unsettling as was her gaze.

“A long time ago, our kind, the Fae as you call them, had a great disaster. I am all that remains of my kingdom now, awakened only briefly in this place…trapped here as an Oracle for the other Courts.” She spoke with a whispering voice Thoxa leaned in close to hear, feeling her body tremble in the presence of this creature. A real Fae, talking to HER.

“I remember little of what caused it–but the violence of the disaster was so great, it cracked the Great Veil, sending Gaia into the Earth weeping–and so her soul, shattered, spread. Into the Underground.” A thin pale hand reached for Thoxa’s own, touching the blue crystal growing there. “It has left its mark so much more than shining rocks. Her magic is unpredictable, Her Will unknowable by even me, one so close to her grave.”

Thoxa felt like sobbing. The woman’s voice was smooth, unfaltering, but the words a melody of sadness, a song of a great tragedy she’d never understand. Kneeling, she shook her head and wiped her teary eyes.

“I-I’m sorry it’s just…” Maybe it was that single touch, a spark from the source. It compelled her to feel what this woman felt, in the realest sense of the word. Like she was sharing her emotions without knowing. The opal woman smiled serenely all the while, watching the goblin try to collect herself. “I also know of Gaia’s influence on one like you, saving you–and now look. You shine from within with the Goddess’ own power, in those shining marks. You knew it all along–you must share something of your ancestor, who was saved.”

“S-saved?” Thoxa blinked, looking up and finally rising. “Oh yes. I remember dreaming of her stirring, of how she felt connected to a goblin on the brink of her own death, a real death, caused by her own outpouring of Mana in the Underground. She reached out and pulled her back, leaving her with the touch of the Goddess. Who knows what might have happened since but clearly it’s had a lasting influence.” The woman paused, seeming to realize something as Thoxa turned over what it meant. What had that first goblin gone through, to nearly die and be saved by a Fae Goddess?! “You have a voice inclined to song,” She muttered thoughtfully after a moment. “It will manifest, if you let it. This Goddess power, this gift through the centuries. Perhaps you are that same soul reborn now for a new purpose.” She shrugged, smiling. “I am an Oracle, even if I feel like a caged one.” “My voice, a gift?” Thoxa chuckled, flushing deep teal at the thought. “Mnn, maybe. I do like to sing. The acoustics in the caverns can be great—” She paused though, frowning. “Why are you caged? Why not be free? Why stay here?” The woman’s emotions flooded her again, wistful and sad. “Many reasons for those many questions. I promise you, I bear it no ill will. It’s my duty now. And you should return—-” “W-wait how? The little…other fairy thing–said I won’t be able to…” “Because I will it. And the Goddess’ Will is in me. I am the Between. I can perform miracles beyond your knowing.” She didn’t say it pridefully, but almost sadly. A great power with great burdens. “Close your eyes.” Thoxa felt compelled to obey, but her heart raced and her mind was spinning like a washing machine with confusion.

The Oracle put her hands gently to Thoxa’s face, brushing those glowing stones. Thoxa gasped, opening her eyes. Suddenly she was in one of the beautiful pools of water in the Caverns, sinking deep, losing air. Reaching up, she felt it was all familiar. The water, the drowning…the way the insides of her, the crystals and the markings, seemed to burn. Blinking again, she was suddenly sitting, soaked and still in her clothes and gear, Alone, in the Caverns. Back home for sure, solid as she sat drenched and confused in the stone pool of clear blue water. “What the hell.” It was a simple statement, not a question, as she slowly stood, shaking off her shoes and climbing out of the pool. Making her way home through the tunnels, she studied the crystals on the walls, on her hands and arms. Every little flickering glow was now a pulse, a connection. To the past, to the Oracle, to the Crystals. She knew her Voice was blessed now, and her connection, while mysterious, was real. Now she had to harness it, use it—her idol dreams were calling.

[hccn-overseer]

Issue 11, 6/28/2023 - The Overseer

This week’s news is once again accompanied by a PDF version of your latest news brought to us once again by the lovely Cheer! Pick it up right here for your viewing pleasure!

The Masquerade!

By Lydia

[Content Warning: Mask Imagery]

[Photographer: Erik Oqvist]

All Hermit Citizens were cordially invited to attend the first formal social event of the year, The Masquerade, hosted by The Garden Club. Depending on the location of each participant, this black-tie event began on either the 23rd or 24th of June, with the chosen venue being The Astral Library in The Nether. The event is still currently taking place and will do so for the remainder of the week, until the 29th or 30th of June, depending on each participant’s time zone. The attendance at The Masquerade rose quickly, with each guest arriving for a night of misdirection, intrigue, celebration, and revelry. Each Citizen seized the chance to show off the incredibly detailed designs of new costumes that many had never debuted before, with each design created by the hands of our exuberant participants.

The Astral Library is a Nether Hub built by Tango Tek, known often for his unsurpassed technical skill. Here, he demonstrates his abilities not only as a diligent engineer but an aesthetically well-versed builder, though he may not speak of it often. With a great number of floors and bookshelves lining the walls and a clear tone of fantasy-centered academic whimsy, The Nether Hub is an ideal choice for an event with a long history of high-society traditions. Sections of The Astral Library used for The Masquerade were divided into the North Gate, the East Gate, the South Gate, the West Gate, the Giant Warped Fungi, and the Purpur Pavillion. The North Gate served as a dimmed area for those sensitive to light, adorned with two misaligned stairs. The East Gate, marked by red stained glass, held a photography booth with amethyst buds to provide an ideal backdrop for Citizens to have their picture taken. The South Gate, marked with lime-stained glass, held the majority of food, as well as a bubbling lava pool for those who needed to stay warm. The West Gate, marked by yellow stained glass, held balconies, open floors, and jukeboxes for those who wished to share their dance moves. The center of the Astral Library held a twisted Giant Warped Fungi and two small pools. Finally, the Purpur Pavillion released its frozen stream to provide an excellent scenic view of the empty void.

The event featured high-end catering provided by many of the Citizen Shop owners who have perfected their culinary skills long before this grand task, one of them being Azelea, the owner of The Lush Cave. These included but weren’t limited to brownies, scones, flan, cupcakes, finger sandwiches, cheese boards, veggie platters, coffee, tea, fruit juices, and water. The event planning team constructed the pools around The Astral Library to accommodate Citizens who are aquatic dwellers, with specifications made for both saltwater and freshwater. Another potential candidate for The Masquerade was either Cub’s Museum or Cleo’s Museum, but neither was chosen due to the heavy preference by most participants for The Astral Library and for the accommodation hosting a party with more attendees than the museums are capable of holding.

While our modern Masquerade centers upon the current trends of fashion, music, and dance, it is known to everyone that Masquerades have a long and storied history. Masquerades are believed to have begun sometime during the Middle Ages as part of a set of Pagan practices, with this one specifically called “Carnival,” involving abbots and bishops cross-dressing and performing a mock Mass accompanied by dancing. The word “carnival” is derived from “carne,” meaning “meat,” denoting the celebration of pleasures related to the subject, both literally and metaphorically. After the ban on Carnival took place during the Protestant Reformation, a new form of Masquerades came to light in the Feast of Fools, a phenomenon that took place during several days leading up to Ash Wednesday, as it implied that for the next several weeks, those who were members of the Catholic religion would avoid any pleasures related to the “Carne” itself. 

Masquerades from the Parisian Carnival are often the most sought-after versions in terms of imagery often seen in popular culture today, with references to Parisian theaters, dance halls, masked balls, and operas. Along with the Parisian Masquerades came the introduction of the lithographic process. The cost of printing more newspapers sank significantly due to the rotary press allowing the newspaper companies to print more papers with advertisements of this new invention. Masquerades also took place during the Revolution of 1848 in France, after having been banned during the French Revolution during the previous century, having been present during these various eras and further solidifying the traits of rejecting social hierarchies for its duration and dressing in striking clothing.

With the Hermit Citizen version of the Masquerade having been planned since April 24th, many participants had been creating their Citizen’s costumes and masquerade masks and sharing them in the artistic areas of the Servers before the event took place. These costumes, designed with innovative artistic visions, included many variations upon the classic masquerade masks made in the style of the Venetian Carnival masks, as well as an abundant collection of self-designed gowns, suits, and combinations of both. Participants sent their Citizens strutting down the famed Red Carpet during The Masquerade to demonstrate their handiwork. For those Citizens who are still searching for a hand-made Masquerade costume, two of the Citizen Shops, Raidne’s Tailor Shop and Spider & Co. Clothing Store, are more than ready to assist any patrons of fashion design. An article written by Nes further covers the many outfits worn by your fellow Hermit Citizens.

Our Head of Staff, Roo, debuted their costume first on the Red Carpet, kicking off the event for the rest of the Hermit Citizen Hub. Z, Jax and Ash, Alistair, Phantom Irene, Cirrus, City, Golden, Winter, Nerd, KP, Erina, and Flayre followed. The rest of the attending Hermit Citizens also gracefully debuted the craftsmanship of their respective Server Participants, eagerly searching for their companions of the past few months. The Masquerade provided the perfect opportunity for new Citizens to acclimate themselves to the Server Community, and for older Citizens to meet new friends. 

Some who had met for the first time had not always been far from each other and took on the chance to familiarize themselves with former unknown neighbors as well as fellow members of their species. Z and KP had previously both lived in Chromia, but had not met until the event had begun. KP had recognized Z’s artistic talent and penchant for baking sweets. Emi and Cirrus, who had both visited The Birdhouse but had not crossed paths until The Masquerade, waltzed together in the first two-person dance of the event. Faces that had been hidden from the view of the Server for an extended period also made appearances at the soiree in their most sophisticated manners. Terra decided to create an illusion and use her magic to bring a familiar into being, earning her a small red dragon companion named Ares as her newfound pet. During the party, Caspian also provided on-the-move catering, offering drinks and sandwiches to the partygoers. We are certain all of the attendees appreciate your help, Caspian!

Some of the guests came intending to stir up the other attendees, such as Victor the Spider, who seized the opportunity to lightly scare two other guests, Z and Terra, shortly after arriving. He did, however, attempt to make nice afterwards with the group and with other guests, including Amethy and Twist. A mysterious Hummingbird Avian also attended and attempted to seduce Raven, much to the chagrin of her partner, Pen. On a humorous note, both the Hummingbird and Raven were created by the same Hermit Citizen Hub participant, allowing her to show off her mischievous side.

A night of revelry had simply become a temporary stage for The Sculkers and the continuation of their attempts to work through the troubles with The Watchers. While Ender welcomed Avid by bringing him to The Masquerade, Avid’s apprehensiveness was not unwarranted as many of the Sculkers are still reluctant to forgive him after he had caused an immense catastrophe, including mutilation and psychological trauma to the Sculkers over the past month before The Masquerade, and his attempt at redemption in their eyes. Whether he will be able to make amends in the future remains to be unseen, but he and Ender remain stalwart in their efforts to do so.

The more secluded corner of the Purpur Pavilion was used for tarot readings, with Cara demonstrating for a small group, inadvertently providing some much-needed emotional support for Pen. Speaking of sentimentality, Pen took a great step in their relationship with Raven, offering a promise ring to her to declare their undying devotion. The Purpur Pavilion also proved to be an excellent getaway spot for the romantic duos of the party, initially beginning as a place for anyone seeking a bit of privacy to becoming the perfect place to express their deepest affection for their romantic partners away from potentially prying eyes.

The Masquerade has become an elaborate backdrop for many to show off the current developments of their Hermit Citizens, and to capture in this moment their states of mind in the middle of many, many character arcs. The Overseer staff has greatly enjoyed being privy to such an enthralling first social gathering for the entire community. The staff hopes that all of our fellow Hermit Citizens have a wonderful time throughout the rest of the week, and wishes the best of luck to everyone in creating future events!

Now onto other news under the cut!

Weekly Weather Report

By Nes

Temperature will be presented in Celsius format, sorry Americans!

Thursday - Light rain is expected to last throughout the day with a high of 21. Wind should be moderate, and the night sky should be prime for stargazing with a lovely look at the moon which is in a waxing phase! Be sure to bring a rain jacket if you’re doing work outside.

Friday - The rain continues into early morning before clearing up into cloudy skies in the afternoon, with a high of 18. Tonight, the sky will be obstructed by clouds, making it difficult to see stars and the moon. There should be no issues with outdoor activity today!

Saturday - Beginning the day with a bit of dew and fog that will clear up by noon and let way to clear skies, there is a dry atmosphere with a high of 20. The sky will remain clear into the evening and the stars are expected to be quite bright. Due to the rather dry weather, it’s suggested you hydrate!

Sunday - Clear skies continue into Sunday and will last all day with a high of 28. Winds will return, giving a moderate breeze and there is a chance of summer showers in the afternoon as clouds move in to cover the sky. The night sky will be cloudy. It is a decent day to do work outside, just be careful of those showers!

Monday - Cloudy skies with high winds and a high of 16 are expected to last throughout the day, and the chances of the sun or moon peaking through the thick clouds is low. Not ideal building conditions, make sure to strap down anything lightweight to be safe!

Tuesday - Cloudy skies and high winds continue with a high of 18, it is likely this will develop into a category 2 hurricane by the evening. The Overseer advises you not to go outside, strap down any valuables, bring animals inside, ensure you have enough food and water in case power goes out, and stay safe!

Wednesday - Light rains will carry over to Wednesday before clearing up in the mid morning and revealing clear skies with a high of 21. The moon is expected to be visible in the evening and rather large. Not a terrible day to clean up any mess the hurricane made.

Throwback #2 Electric Boogaloo

By Ilea

Welcome back to the little trivia corner once again. I am once again Il and I am here to talk about the amazing trivia in the world of Hermits and Crafting. This time a story I have is about ecological horror, plans gone wrong and just the general story of the Goopy Geyser. 

On the server, there is an amazing area called the Donut. It can be seen from spawn, firstly, and was meant to be Mumbo’s base, then a shopping district, but now, it is the Empires Christmas area. However, when it was meant to be the shopping district, the specific place where all the shops were meant to be was a huge cave. We all know and love Joe Hills, and this story revolves around him just wanting to make a bubble elevator.

The cave was a lush cave, which meant that tropical fish would spawn in it, and that the bubble elevator made for the convenience of Hermits started spitting out massive amounts of tropical fish. Naturally, Joe made an attraction out of it and for some time, the nature in the donut was healing.

Sadly, it was taken from us with the update, but if you ever wish to experience the true nature noises, I could not recommend this video more.

Goopy Geyser, you will be missed and hopefully remembered by the random coordinate fishes that are found in weird places on the server to this day.

Astrology Corner

By Corundumcat

Have you been feeling without guidance? Do you look at your birthday and look up your star sign and wonder, “Have I eaten enough cake this week?” “Will I be cake-assigned this week?”  Don’t worry, here at The Overseer, we can help you.*

Aries: a cake made up of cheese ( sorry to folk who are lactose intolerant)

Taurus: lemon drizzle cake

Gemini: ice cream cake 

Cancer: blackforest cake

Leo: lane cake

Virgo: chocolate crepe cake 

Libra: cinnamon mocha cake

Scorpio: cherry blossom and strawberry mousse 

Sagittarius: chocolate orange cake

Capricorn: Overseer cake 

Aquarius: matcha cake

Pisces: brownie cake

All star signs: Don’t worry, eat cake. 

*Ignore how blatantly specific these are. Nothing bad will happen to you.

Lost and Found

By Lydia

All of the following items have been brought to The Overseer staff’s office for safekeeping until they are claimed. If you recognize one of these items as yours, please visit us to receive your items, or contact us at lostandfound@thehermitnews.org. Thank you! *Not a real email address.

Item 1: Several Stray Cats These cats include two Tabby cats, one Maine Coon, three Norwegian Forest cats, and one Turkish Angora. All of these cats are being well-cared for by our staff members who have an affinity for these creatures, which is the majority of those working here at The Overseer. If any of these cats are yours, please be careful when attempting to pry them out of the hands of our staff members. While the cats may not bite, the staff members may do so, as they have grown very attached to them.

Item 2: A dark magenta and gold Battle Hammer This battle hammer is almost as tall as the average Player and features an ornate design on its head plated in gold. The handle, in a dark magenta color, is meticulously painted, and the bottom of the handle is also plated in gold. The craftsmanship of this hammer appears forged from many years of carefully practiced skills, and we commend the creator for such excellently executed work! 

[This Minecraft Battle Hammer was created by Berry, who posted a photograph of it in the Media channel.]

Item 3: Posters advertising Sheriff Jimmy Solidarity-themed Popsicles Posters created and distributed by Azure were given to many Citizens looking for a tasty treat on Thursday morning, although some of these posters were found scattered around both Grian’s Base and Decked Out, but were not hung up. If you would like to pick up a poster, please visit The Overseer Headquarters and follow the directions to find yourself the perfect remedy on a hot summer day!

Item 4: Several photographs of The Astral Library during preparations for The Masquerade These photographs depict several areas of The Astral Library with decor set for The Masquerade, including pictures of the Giant Warped Fungi, several stories of library floors, the Purpur Pavillion, a set of open balconies, jukeboxes, a photography booth, and an open waterfall pouring down into the Void below it. No Citizens were depicted in these photographs.

Item 5: A pair of red high-heeled shoes and makeup A pair of very bright candy apple red stilettos in size 9 in women’s shoes were found in The Astral Library near the photography booth between the East Gate and the South Gate. A makeup set including dark red lipstick, smoky eye shadow, and liquid eyeliner was also found next to these shoes without anything to hold them. If these items are yours, we hope you had a glamorous night at The Masquerade, and commend your taste in both fashion and makeup.

Item 6: A men’s dress shoe partially covered with sculk A men’s brown leather dress shoe in a size 14 was found in the Purpur Pavilion. No one wanted to touch it without using a claw grabber as it appeared that the sculk could have been still active, shifting in various directions. The Overseer staff has kept it in a glass case and has been watching the Sculk slowly spread to overtake the entire shoe. Those in its vicinity have noted that they feel an overwhelming desire to try it on, but none have attempted to do so for fear of the sculk spreading further, and no one wants to make contact with it. If this shoe is yours, we will pay you several diamonds to take it away from us!

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Treat yourself today with two full stacks of Enchantea’s special tea for only one diamond! Buy one get one free for a limited time only! Located across the water from the Shopping District in a Birch tea cup!

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Looking for more tasty treats? Maybe a quick snack before your next big adventure? Well head on down to the Lush Cave bakery in the Shopping district to find a lovely shop with even lovlier treats!

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Please remember to fill out the Citizen Census form as it closes on the 28th! Don’t forget to fill out one form per citizen!

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Fun and Games

This week's fun and games are brought to you by Lydia and Azure!

Word Search and Crossword by Lydia

Brain Teasers by Azure

And that's all for this week's news folks! Thank you for reading and have a wonderful week.