#cause they’re simple and don’t require too much effort so i can finish them rather quickly c:

[jitters-art]

btw i will continue with some of the other suggestions when i need a break from my commissions! thank you guys so much for the suggestions, i’m very excited to do some of them!

[demonsandco]

Okay okay we know with their demon forms it requires a lot of upkeep now what do you think they would do and what they need help with. Cause what comes to mind is a family grooming session 😊

I love this ask thank youuuu. I wasn't sure if you wanted their canon forms, but this is mostly based on my own personal headcanons for their demon forms! I hope you don’t mind that :) It would be much easier for them to handle their insane forms, but what's the fun in that?

Before I start, all demon horns need constant maintenance. Demon horns never actually stop growing, so routine sanding, usually with a custom shaped whetstone, is important to keep horns smooth and to keep them from getting too long. Without proper care, horns can easily become overgrown and asymmetrical, as well as gain a rough, dry and almost scaly texture, which is rather uncomfortable for the demon in question

All other forms of upkeep vary from demon to demon, depending on what features they have (ei. scales, feathers, fur, hair, etc.).

Lucifer

Lucifer's horns are rather easy to reach, curling forward along the sides of his head, so it's fairly simple for him to keep them maintained himself. It's something that he does often, especially because neglecting them could easily impact his image. After all, it's common to see him bring out his demon form to intimidate others, and he wants to make sure he looks well put together. Caring for his horns is not much different than shaving his face in the morning, nothing more than a quick and simple part of his routine.

The thing that actually gives Lucifer trouble is his wings and tail. General self care is something he can handle easily, but feathers naturally wear down and need to be replaced, which means molting. Molting leaves him feeling absolutely miserable. His entire back starts looking patchy and he feels itchy and irritated all over, but he can never seem to properly reach the areas giving him trouble himself. His pride tends to get in the way of asking for help, so he's often left to suffer through it until the new feathers finish growing in.

Lucifer would need to trust someone quite a bit in order to let them help, but it's always a huge relief to have that itchiness soothed by a caring hand. Most often, Mammon ends up being the one to help out. Not only is the second born the only other one who still has feathers, but he's also very skilled at reading Lucifer's moods and telling when he needs help. They never speak about it afterwards, but it's a much needed binding experience for both of them.

(The rest are under the cut)

Mammon

Being a model, Mammon takes very good care of his appearance. Unfortunately, no matter how many times he does it, his horns always give him an insane amount of trouble. They're very tightly coiled and rest at a slightly backwards angle, making it difficult for Mammon to reach the inside parts of his horns. It's not uncommon to see him sulking his way over to Asmodeus' room for help with those hard to reach areas, after spending hours trying to do it himself and failing.

Other than his horns, Mammon has it pretty easy. Like Lucifer, he has to deal with molting, but it never seems to last too long for him, much to the eldest's envy. His wings are also featherless, so molting is nowhere near as uncomfortable for him. The only big feathers he needs to worry about replacing are the ones on his tail. The rest are much smaller and less irritating to regrow.

His wings and other featherless areas do need extra care, though, in the form of moisturizing. Without protection from feathers, those areas get dry and cracked easily, especially if he goes flying. To deal with it, he's got a pretty big collection of scented moisturizing lotions and oils that he can pick from, most of which were gifts from Asmodeus, since they have similar wings.

Leviathan

Levi's demon form is rather unique compared to his brothers. Instead of having true horns, he has antlers. Rather than needing constant care, his horns grow to their full size, shed their outer layer of skin and then eventually fall off to start the process again. Levi often goes to the ocean to isolate himself when his horns are ready to fall. He usually lets them sink to the bottom, where they take the form of the devildom equivalent of coral, providing shelter for aquatic life.

On top of shedding his horns, he also sheds his skin. His sheds are entirely determined by his horns, happening once when the antlers are full grown and ready to lose their protective, velvety skin, and again later on when they're ready to fall. While his antlers' life cycle is reminiscent of a deer's, the shedding of his skin is very similar to a snake's shed. It's not hard to tell when Levi is close to shedding. The old skin begins to separate itself from his new scales, giving him a dull gray sheen over his body and his eyes begin to look dull and glazed over.

It's definitely not a pleasant feeling and he can't see very well through the skin either, so he tends to avoid his brothers. High humidity is also needed for him to shed properly, so if he can't go hide out at sea, Levi's going to lock himself in his room and soak miserably in his bathtub.

Satan

Satan's self care routine isn't too difficult, but it's definitely the most time consuming and he absolutely hates it. He's not the most patient demon, especially when it comes to tasks that he thinks are wasting his time. When it's time for him to maintain his more demonic features, Satan needs to put aside an entire day for it.

Satan's horns are easy enough for him to handle. The inside part of the sharp curve of them often gives him some trouble, but he's nothing if not stubborn, so he usually manages to sort it out on his own. Horns on their own are rather time-consuming to care for, but what really takes up all of Satan's time is the multiple other horn-like protrusions along his body, as well as his tail. He's got boney spikes in the areas that his bones are closer to the skin (elbows, spine, ribs, jaw, etc.) and, like regular horns, they're constantly growing.

Whether he likes it or not, he always ends up needing to ask someone for help, and that someone usually ends up being Asmo. Not only is the process tedious, but he also has a very hard time reaching the spines on his back properly, so a helping hand is very useful.

Asmodeus

Unsurprisingly, Asmo has a very in depth routine that he follows to a t. Every week, he sets aside an evening to take care of his horns and wings specifically, sanding down his horns to keep them smooth and shiny, and moisturizing his wings with oils and lotions to keep the skin supple and soft. Being related to scorpions, Asmo also has a carapace in his true form that resembles the exoskeleton of actual scorpions. It doesn't need much extra care, but he always makes sure to keep it bright and polished.

The downside to his carapace is that it can't actually heal unless Asmo molts and completely replaces it. He's not the biggest fan of molting, but he'll force himself to molt early if he gets scratched or hurt in any way. He can't stand the thought of any part of him looking dull or banged up.

Overall, though, Asmo definitely has his self care handled perfectly. He's also very particular about how things are done, so he's very hesitant to let anyone else do it for him. He does, however, love helping his brothers out with grooming and self care. Especially the ones that he knows are likely to neglect themselves without a proper push.

Beelzebub

Beel's self care leaves much to be desired. He's completely horrible at taking care of his demonic attributes, but he often forgets about it or runs out of time. It's not uncommon for his horns to be rough and chipped or for his insect-like carapace to look dull and roughed up, especially with how aggressive his sports matches can get. Between school, working out, fangol and his constant hunger, regular upkeep gets put on the backburner.

Luckily, Beel and his twin often partake in allogrooming! They both find it easier to take care of each other, rather than themselves. This is especially helpful when it comes to Beel's horns. They curve so tightly along the sides of his head that he can't actually fit his hands between the horns and his skin to smooth them out. Belphie, on the other hand, has much smaller hands and can easily reach around and sand them down, while Beel takes care of him in turn. They rarely talk during these moments, but it serves as good bonding time for the two of them.

Beel's carapace is something he can handle himself, mostly because it doesn't really require anything. Like Asmo's, the only way for his carapace to "heal" is for him to molt and replace it, which he puts off for as long as possible. It's thick and hardy and since he doesn't put much stock in looking perfectly put together, he doesn't worry about it all that much. Whenever he does feel the need to molt, it goes by pretty quickly and he's back to his regular schedule in no time.

Belphegor

Belphie is honestly the worst at taking care of himself. Not because he doesn't care, but because he has such a hard time gathering up enough motivation to even get up in the mornings, much less put in the effort to look nice. If no one steps in, he can go days at a time without brushing just the hair on his head. Even on the days that he does that much, chances are that he didn't bother brushing the rest of his fur, too. After all, if he just doesn't show off his demon form, then no one will notice right?

Luckily for him, Beel does notice when his twin hasn't been caring for himself. While the rest of the brothers only need to worry about their demon forms every other week or even just once a month, Belphie needs to do it daily because of his coat. Without proper daily care, his hair gets oily and matted together very easily, which only makes it harder to deal with later. Beel knows that that's a lot to handle and often steps to brush out his twin's coat, even if he doesn't need any help in return. It's much easier for Belphie to feel motivated enough to help groom Beel than it is to care for himself, so their joint grooming helps them both.

On a similar note, Belphie has quite a bit of trouble with his horns and he constantly puts off taking care of them until they begin causing him physical discomfort. In the past, there's been a few times where he's let them grow a couple extra curls before they started weighing him down so much that he had to take care of it. With his twin's help, and a strictly imposed schedule, his horns haven't gotten that bad in ages, but they still tend to be rather rough most of the time. He also needs to sand down his hooves in a similar fashion. Normally, they'd be maintained just by walking on rough surfaces, but Belphie definitely doesn't walk around enough for that.

If Beel's not around to help out, Belphie has no qualms with playing the baby brother card and whining until one of the others agrees to help him. He's always willing to groom them in return, though, so he usually gets his way pretty easily.

[concussed-to-pieces]

To Tell You The Truth Part Six

Fandom: Prospect [2018]

Pairing: Eventual Ezra/Prospector!Reader

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN:  Welcome, welcome! This whole chapter is like. Fluff, with a sprinkle of healing. Prime indulgence hours. Enjoy!

Tag List: @huliabitch @renegademustelid @wrestlingfae @zombiexbody @sporadic-fics @rzrcrst @lackofhonor @the-feckless-wonder @arrowswithwifi @fioccodineveautunnale @absurdthirst @cryptkeepersoul @fleetwoodmactshirt @88dragon06 @roxypeanut

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Ezra displayed your battered helmet alongside his own on the mantelpiece above the faux fireplace, the two domes leaned into one another as if engaged in private conversation. 

Most evenings found both of you in the main room of his modest apartment, him pacing back and forth as he recounted various portions of his 'semi-fictitious' memoir that were giving him trouble, while you drew and offered input where you hoped it might be beneficial. 

"My editor, Kevva bless him, dares to insinuate that I am too ponderously wordy for the average book market." Ezra bemoaned one evening, dramatically collapsing into a sprawl of limbs on the couch alongside you. "'Get to the point, Ezra!' As if it is that simple, to just trim the fat off the prize cut of loin without regard for the flavor it provides!" He spat indignantly. 

"You are very…" you searched through all the fanciful words you had picked up from him, finally settling on, "verbose. Almost to a fault. Sometimes I wonder if you're deliberately taking three times as long to say something."

"If I am to be prolific with my speech, I would rather be saying somethin' that people are interested in listenin' to." Ezra retorted, sounding somewhat betrayed over you taking his editor's side. "I've endured countless lectures from individuals with some form of power over me and none of them possessed a modicum of eloquence. Their words were weapons of the bluntest sort: hackneyed and ramshackle and detestable." His voice dipped lower, gravelly and reverent. "I would rather a singular articulate quote to a thousand plain, lifeless, uninventive platitudes. Words are all I've ever had for most of my existence, gentle soul. They are a precious commodity gleaned not from the treacherous climes of some deadly moon, but from the stolen tomes and salvaged papers of civilization long past." 

He rubbed his temples, obviously exasperated. You, on the other hand, were a bit flushed. His rants were always a joy to witness, whether you wanted to admit it or not. There was something about Ezra getting riled up that you found mesmerizing.

"I apologize, gentle soul. You are not here to be my sounding board, and I shall not treat you as such." He said finally, dragging his hands down his face. "I will not subject you to my bouts of tempestuous querulousness."

"Hey, you can talk to me all you want! I just wish I could contribute usefully to your musing, that's all. I'm not nearly as well-spoken, I'd hate to use a word wrong." You replied, grimacing. "Like querulous...querulousness." 

"It means I am peeved. Cantankerous."

"You?" You gasped in mock-surprise. 

He groaned, "I did not realize how astute you were." You spotted the corner of his mouth twitching upwards and you knew you had him, nudging your elbow into his side until he surrendered and gave you a lazy grin. 

"Ezra, what does 'mercado' mean?"

He jerked upright out of his slump at that, looking confused. "Where did you hear that word?" 

"From...you?" You replied uncertainly. "It was while we were still...um, in the tent, I had just finished with your arm and you were looking through my sketchbook." His blank stare prompted you to continue, "you saw a picture I drew of the west dock and you-"

"Oh!" Ezra gasped, his eyes brightening with comprehension. He bounded off the couch, vanishing into his room. You sat there, wholly bewildered, until he reemerged struggling into his coat. He seized your hands, tugging you upright and then kissing your forehead. "You precious, beautiful woman!" He praised. "I am so glad you reminded me of our blood pact, sworn over the battered salvage of my arm on that accursed moon."

"Uh." Precious. Beautiful. "Blood...pact?"

"Hurry up, hurry up, put on your coat!" Ezra demanded. You imagined you could see his blond streak fairly bristling with excitement. "We must go."

"Go?"

"To the mercado!" Again with that gratuitous, flamboyant roll of the 'r'. You were beginning to suspect that he was enjoying himself. 

"What, now?" You asked, allowing yourself to be essentially spun into your long coat. "But it's dark out-"

"All the more reason to rush! If we aren't expedient, they may be closed when we get there!" He grabbed your hand once again. "Kevva waits for no man, gentle soul!"

...

You had never run the length of the Pug's west dock without some incredibly valid, logical reason. So the fact that you were currently running because you were being giddily dragged along by a large man who was far too invested in deep fried food spoke volumes toward the sheer amount of the things that had changed in your life.

"Wait, wait-" You finally had to stop him, your side aching from your haphazard sprint. Ezra halted, appearing confused as you wheezed for air. You clung to his hand a bit tighter than you meant to.

"What's wrong?" He asked worriedly. 

"C-Can't-" you gasped. "Hurts. Gimme' a second."

"I--oh. Oh! Gentle soul, why didn't you voice your discomfort earlier?!" He erupted in a panic. "Sit down, sit, I'll-"

"No no, I'm okay. It's just a stitch." You tried to calm him, but he was having none of it.

"I must insist that you sit down, immediately." He implored, sounding distraught. "If I have caused you harm, if your wound-"

"Hey, I'm okay." You interrupted him firmly. "I'm just a little less...in-shape, you know? Tender still." 

"I feel like a tyrant, I offer my most sincere reparations." 

"Ezra, oh my gods. You're so dramatic." You half-laughed, your breath catching when he kissed your knuckles in contrition. "We can keep going, I just can't run across the entire dock."

"If you are certain, gentle soul?" Ezra asked, gesturing back the way you came and arching his brows. "We can always jettison this fanciful excursion, should you require a reprieve."

You shook your head, tugging on his hand. "Nope, we're already down here. Keep one foot moving. If we get there and they're closed, then I'll need a reprieve. To mourn my loss." 

"Too true!" He agreed, mindfully shortening his strides. "It's not far now. Once we arrive, promise me you'll rest?"

"If you feed me, absolutely." You joked.

"I would love nothin' more than the opportunity to dote upon you, gentle soul."

You laughed for real this time, assuming he was playing along with your jibe. When he didn't join in, you tucked your chin down into the collar of your jacket in embarrassment. "Ezra, you...you take care of me all the time." You pointed out, feeling shy of all things.

"You are my partner." He answered simply. 

Partner. "I...Damon, h-he-" You began to speak, but then choked off at the last second. 

Ezra stopped dead and you closed your eyes, scolding yourself for starting something you knew you wouldn't finish. "Martyr's malfeasance." The brown-haired man cursed softly.

"I'm...I'm sorry," you hurried to apologize. "I don't know why I...just forget I said anything, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ruin the fun." 

"Every time I hear about him, he strikes me more and more as a man that I should have taken my sweet time disposin' of." Ezra snarled in that furiously cheery tone, his words stoking the tiny fire that you sheltered in your stomach. 

Your grip on his hand tightened after a moment. "He didn't deserve the effort."

"Do not apologize for the shortcomings of others, gentle soul. I reiterate that I am here to listen if you need me. Though I warn you, I may not be able to keep from interruptin'." Ezra's eyes had gone dark with thought, his expression distressingly grim. "I am, at the end of the day, a loquacious fool." He perked up after a moment, pausing in front of a brightly-lit open air market. "Ah, and here we are! It appears that luck is with us, gentle soul, they do not close for another hour. Shall we fulfill our pact?"

The rest of your evening out was spent (intentionally or not, though you had your suspicions) effectively chasing off the shadow that recalling Damon had cast over you. Despite your protests, Ezra did end up feeding you half an order's worth of the delectable little sopaipillas, one by one.

...

When the rainy season hit, storms whipped through Puggart Bench and its wards with all the delicacy of a green prospector getting their hands on their first pull. It wasn't so much of an issue during the day; the sound of Ezra diligently expounding to himself usually muffled the howling winds or pouring rain. Late at night however, you couldn't help but imagine that the rumble of thunder was the pod striking the atmosphere, or that the rattling of the rain on the windowpanes was thrower fire. Your dreams turned frantic and riddled with nightmares. You even tried keeping your bedroom light on at one point to combat it, but it just amplified the shadows and gave your mind more fuel for its inventive fire.

You struggled in solitude for a good few nights, until one evening when you finally couldn't endure any longer. Surely he wouldn't mind, you would be quiet.

You slipped from your bed, bringing your pillow along as you padded down the hall to his room. Just as you reached for the keypad, the door slid open.

Ezra stood in front of you, a thin blanket and one of his pillows underneath his arm. He stared down at you. You stared up at him, your own pillow clutched tightly to your chest. "I..." he coughed awkwardly. "Er, the howling gale outside has...my nerves a bit...frayed. I merely-"

"Oh thank gods, I'm so glad it wasn't just me." You felt like you would burst with relief. "I was coming to ask if I could sleep in your room."

"What a novel coincidence! I was about to throw myself upon your mercies as well." Ezra winced at the thunder that boomed overhead after he spoke. "An expedient compromise is in order, gentle soul. We will adjourn to my quarters for this particular endeavor."

He stepped aside with a little bow and you entered the room, going to curl up on the floor at the foot of the bed.

"Gentle soul, I think you've done enough proverbial listenin' at the teacher's feet to last a lifetime. Make yourself comfortable." He urged, spreading his blanket back out on the bed. "If we must weather this storm in conjunction, I would prefer you were nearer rather than farther."

You opened your mouth to protest and the wind whipped the rain against the windows with a hollow rattle, sounding for all the world like a thrower shot at range. Your fists clenched on your thighs. 

Damon isn't here. It's just Ezra. It's only Ezra.

Ezra turned to face you after meticulously smoothing out the wrinkles in his blanket, his forced smile and hollow eyes reminding you that you weren't the only one haunted by ghosts of your past. He extended a hand and you grabbed hold, letting him pull you up off the floor.

You fell into him, burying your face in his chest for a selfish moment. "Thank you." You whispered, uncertain if he even heard you over the rumble of thunder.

Ezra pressed his lips to your hairline and then ushered you underneath the blankets. He was achingly chaste, as though he thought you might bolt if he showed any sort of blatant affection. Truly, you might have if it had been any other person. His tentative touch rested on your wrist for a moment before he laced his fingers together with yours.

"Your proximity is a balm to my troubled thoughts, gentle soul." He murmured. "You turn my mind to poetic wanderings; dalliances in sun-dappled clearings, rain that does not make me fear for my life." Ezra sighed, the noise barely audible. "All too often I am back there in my dreams; suffering mutiny, I am left to decompose until a gentle soul comes and pulls me up out of the weeds."

"I have nightmares about Damon." You confessed softly. 

The grip he had on your fingers tightened ever so slightly. "I said I would not ask, and I will not tarnish that promise. I am here, gentle soul." His eyes searched your own, forehead furrowed with concern. "I have never trusted someone as I trust you. I have never...you fought alongside me, you placed your life in my hands, despite-" He paused, swallowing thickly. "You have earned all the time you might ever need. If it is mine to give, it is already yours."

His words, unwavering and slow, were what pushed you over the edge. In a voice that trembled and eventually broke, you finally told him everything. You held nothing in reserve, the terrible stories of all those nights in the pod tumbling out of you one after the other. You were so tired of carrying everything in silence, and talking about it...it was as though it made it all real. Tangible. Something that you could finally release.

Ezra was surprisingly still through the whole endeavor, the normally-animated man obviously reining himself in. The only indication of his own mental state was the way he occasionally rubbed his thumb over your knuckles as you spoke about particularly trying instances. 

"So this is the explanation." He said hoarsely once you lapsed into silence once more. "This is the trauma that you bear upon your precious, gentle soul. I...You've held it so tightly for so long, even though it wounds you. What has changed?"

"I found you." You replied bluntly. It was nonsensically simple to say, but it was true. He inhaled sharply. "You could have killed me, but instead-"

"I couldn't have." Ezra denied, shaking his head. "I saw you and while I knew I could play the part of the villain, I couldn't have...I wouldn't do anythin' to you. If not simply because you didn't slaughter me where I stood, then when you told me you had that kit and you almost broke my jaw after I startled you." He worked his jaw for a moment, like he still felt the echo of your head slamming into it. "And that man, the Sader, tryin' to tempt me into tradin' you in like livestock…"

"Because of everything that happened to me before, I...I panicked. I shouldn't have. I should have trusted you."

Ezra shook his head. "You had every right. I apologize for makin' you feel as though I would have accepted that pittance. I should have discussed everythin' with you beforehand." Lightning flashed nearby and thunder boomed, making you flinch sharply. Ezra urged you closer, his ragged shirt pressing to your cheek as you hid your face in his chest. "Martyr's malfeasance, your tenderness carves the heart out of me." He whispered. "You make me wish I was a reputable individual."

You started to apologize and he waved it off, stroking the back of your head and lulling you to sleep.

Despite the comfort his proximity brought you, the nightmares still came. You woke up panicking, as you often did, struggling away from the grip of the man beside you. He grunted and reached out to switch on the bedside table lamp. Ezra. It was just Ezra. You scolded yourself for your reaction, beginning to apologize again. But he simply rolled over and pressed his forehead to yours, humming in his throat sleepily. 

Your fingers tangled in his shirt as you slowly relaxed against him and he mumbled, "In my dreams you come to me, as timid and inexorable as the dawn," brown eyes already half-lidded again. He sounded like he was reciting something, the words slurred with exhaustion, "In my sleepless hours you find me, tremulous and waning like the starlight." 

You closed your eyes, just listening to his voice and letting it soothe you back into a doze.

"For I am a lost man who wanders bright and dark, all for the fleeting glimpse of you…"

…

His right hand had some minor nerve damage, which was to be expected. The infection had crept deep. You noticed a distinct lack of buttons on a majority of his new clothing, zipper pulls apparently easier to operate left-handed. 

As the storms grew worse though, so too did his hand. It would occasionally seize up in bad weather, which unfortunately was all the time during the rainy season. Ezra was thoroughly miserable, though he attempted to hide it. The rapid progress on editing his memoir slowed to a grinding crawl as he pecked away one-handed, keeping his right secured in a brace for most of the time.

"Kevva damn it." He swore one grey morning, struggling fiercely with the tie around his neck. He was supposed to meet with his publisher and he always tried to dress the part.

"Hey," You yawned from the kitchen doorway, "you okay?" 

"Gentle soul I must beg your assistance, I will be late!" Ezra pleaded from the bathroom, his tone distressed. 

You left your mug on the counter, stifling another yawn as you slipped into the bathroom and batted his hands away from his neck. "Hold still." You mumbled, barely awake. His fingers dug into the sink on either side of you as you worked. When you glanced up you saw that his eyes were bright with unshed tears, his gaze fixed determinedly on his own reflection in the mirror. "It's okay to be upset, you know."

His jaw worked and he swallowed hard, obviously disagreeing but unable to vocalize it.

"I got it. All done." You soothed, patting the knot flat. "You won't be late. Be sure to check your fly." His eyes widened in panic and his hands flew to his zipper, making you burst out laughing. "Not now, Ezra! When you get there!" You grinned, playfully bumping your knuckles into his stomach just above his belt. 

Ezra's chuckle was a little watery, but you chose to ignore it to let him think he was saving face. "What would I do without you, gentle soul? Wander the streets half-dressed with my placket splayed, I imagine." He mused, pressing a fond kiss to your forehead. "Now, Kevva waits. I will return presently. I believe it would be prudent for you to begin amassin' your sketches. We seem to be in the final stages of pre-production."

"Isn't it exciting?" You asked brightly.

"I am nervous enough to void my stomach." Ezra admitted. He squeezed your hand tightly. "I wish you could come with me, gentle soul. You make me feel at ease."

"You should have woken me up earlier, then!" 

"You would have come with me?" He sounded surprised, running his hands through his unruly hair in an effort to smooth it down. "These meetings are so toilsome. At least if you were there, my publisher might spare me his tedious lectures." His blond streak sprang back up once his hands had passed, continuing its perennial goal of sticking out at a rakish angle.

You reached up to gently tug on the unruly little tuft of hair, smiling at him. "Suffering is no fun if you're doing it alone."

"Misery does indeed love its company." He sighed, his hand shifting up to cup your own on his temple. "These hands of yours, I..." he paused, grimacing in pain and flexing his own fingers. "Dammit, I…"

"I'll be here when you get back." You said simply. "Just like any other day."

Ezra's eyes were dark with thought as he stared down at you, the silence stretching almost uncomfortably long. "I...of course. Yes." He replied, his voice quiet. 

You weren't expecting the call from him several hours later. You were just tucking into your lunch when your headset began to chime and you scrambled across the kitchen to grab it. "Yes, oh esteemed roommate?" You greeted him in the usual manner, smiling even though he couldn't see you.

"Gentle soul, are you busy?" 

You stared longingly at your lunch. "I was about to eat. What's up?"

"He wants to see your sketches."

Your heart dropped. You weren't sure why, it wasn't as if you hadn't anticipated needing to have your own work checked over. Deep down you had hoped they would have more important things to consider, but it couldn't be helped. "What, now?"

Ezra's words were strangely clipped, so different from his usual flowery speech. "I'll be returnin' shortly, if you're amenable?"

"Absolutely, absolutely. I'll get...I'll gather everything up." You hurriedly put your plate back into the cooler. "Are you okay?" 

"He has been more abrasive than usual, but I anticipated as much." He sighed raggedly and you heard the sound of the starter. "I've been out of sorts since this mornin'." He confessed. "I am uncertain as to why. Perhaps it's simply the weight of my own mortality catchin' up to me."

Your hands stilled in the process of shoving all your hard copies together. "Ezra, did something happen?"

"Nothin' aside from my immaculate personage being stained with impotence in the most mundane task imaginable." Ezra griped.

"Don't scare me like that." You scolded him. "I understand you're upset, but please don't use words like mortality. Gets me nervous."

"Fear not, gentle soul. I'll plague you for a good few years yet." He teased. "I am simply mourning the loss of a certain autonomy. The rain will not last forever, but while it lingers I imagine my moods shall be as grim as a graveyard."

"You'll have to try harder than that, you...poetically dour thing, you." You retorted dryly, shoving your hard copies into your unused portfolio. His laughter was loud in your ear. You loved when he laughed like that, all bright and startled like you had surprised it out of him.

You loved a lot of things about him, if you were being honest.

…

His publisher was a man named Thomas Anglio. He was in his late fifties, purportedly had no sense of humor and wore suits that were immaculately tailored.

The man's lack of humor was probably due to the stress of his job, you reasoned charitably. Managing so many aspiring authors couldn't be an easy feat, especially when he also had to juggle a certain querulous someone. At least you knew Ezra was paying him generously.

The secretary waved Ezra on tiredly, already reaching for the next Serv tablet before he was even done signing the both of you in. 

You trailed along behind him as he strode into Mr. Anglio's office, the dark-haired man the picture of easy confidence. "I present my illustrious, illustrative companion." Ezra introduced you grandly as Mr. Anglio rose from behind his desk. "Gentle soul, this is Mister Thomas Anglio, a stalwart friend and a fiercely fashionable silver fox."

"You flatter me, Ezra." Thomas sighed, shaking your hand. "Please, take a seat and show me what you have prepared."

You obliged nervously, your hands trembling slightly as you undid your first bundle of sketches. "I believe what Ezra wanted was to have them sort of...scattered through the book at key points. Headers for each chapter, as well." You spread the pages out on the desk and Thomas leaned forward to examine them. 

"Ezra, you are not writing a children's book." He pointed out practically. "The subject matter of this...strangely-realistic fiction of yours is decidedly adult."

"I am wholly convinced that my tale will not be half as impactful without their sketches, Mr. Anglio." Ezra insisted firmly. 

Thomas groaned, rubbing his temples. "At least I know you're not doing this just to pad the final page count." He settled back in his chair, leafing through the piles of sketches. You had tried to separate them out by chapter, though due to Ezra's constant revisions you were certain some of them were out of place. "You understand we will not be using all of these, correct?" Anglio seemed relieved when you nodded hurriedly.

"I thought it would be better to have too many than too few." You explained quietly. 

"You have quite the knack for drawing." He mused, lingering on one stack in particular. "Your portraits of Ezra are remarkable."

You heard Ezra swallow loudly beside you.  "Portraits…?" The former prospector echoed tentatively.

Your brain ran back to you scrambling to collect all your sketches, shutting your eyes in silent panic as you realized you must have shuffled in the extra ones you hadn't meant to bring along.

"Yes, these appear to be for the portion of the story where our brave hero barters with a mercenary gang for safe passage off the moon. If I'm recalling correctly, of course." Mr. Anglio slid the pile of sketches to Ezra, who snatched them up immediately. 

You saw his brown eyes go wide and you quickly ducked your head, busying yourself with pretending to sort through the groups of sketches. This was what you got for being disorganized! There were only supposed to be one or two from that scene!

The rest of the meeting was spent whittling down the groups of sketches to two per chapter, or three if they were small enough. Thomas also politely requested that you retool a few things, "this woman's helmet looks dangerously close to that inquisitor's from the Second Illumination. The last thing any of us want is to be sued by a failed monarchy."

You would say that the meeting went well, but you were so busy dreading being alone with Ezra again that it was all a blur. You just knew that your copious amounts of sketches focused on him would be subject to thorough questioning. And well they should be, it was borderline obsessive.

The jut of his jaw, the strong profile of his aquiline nose, the streak of blond above his right temple...all lovingly captured time and again. With and without the helmet. 

You were certain you would be lucky to escape unscathed, waiting in fear for the proverbial pot to boil over. 

...

"All you needed to do was ask, gentle soul." Ezra finally drawled after watching you anxiously wring your hands for the majority of the ride back to Ward Twenty-Seven. "Had I known that you wished so fervently to render me artistically, I would have happily sat for hours that you might properly capture my magnanimous visage."

"Please, please don't be upset." You begged, your fists tight in your lap. "I'll move out, okay? I'll leave and...and you'll never have to see me again. I'll send you the revised story sketches over the Serv, I'll-" His hand reached for your leg over the center console and you almost jumped out of your skin. "Wait, I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, please don't-"

"Gentle soul, I am not aggrieved in the slightest." Ezra assured you quietly. "Breathe. You seem ready to go to pieces." He rubbed your thigh soothingly, back and forth. "Breathe."

"You...you're not angry with me?" You asked tentatively. And really, you ought to have established that from your time in the Green! 

Angered Ezra was a looming thundercloud, he was magma barely contained by fragile crust. His fury, though an absolute force of nature, dissipated as soon as it arrived, like the outbursts wearied him too much to perpetuate and maintain. Damon had seethed and resurrected his anger whenever the mood struck him, so it was odd to engage with someone who seemed to deem the emotion more trouble than it was worth. You knew that the man currently in the driver's seat was a hundred times more likely to launch into a woebegone soliloquy about how tenuous material possessions were if he spilled tea on his shirt. But old habits died hard; you couldn't seem to keep yourself from getting wound up.

"Far from it! You capture my countenance in a way that is decidedly more flatterin' than any mirror." Ezra tilted his head. "I am...envious of the man you have drawn." He admitted softly. "I wish that he and I were one and the same."

You weren't quite sure what to say. At least he wasn't angry. Or he said he wasn't. If anything, he sounded...sad. "What do you mean?" You asked, your brow furrowed as you recalled what he had said the night you shared his bed.

You make me wish I was a reputable individual.

Ezra shrugged, sighing, "Nothin' at all, gentle soul. The rain is just makin' me morose, I'm afraid. I'll be glad to be home again."

Home.

"Want me to make some tea when we get home?"

The soft smile he directed your way had no business settling in your stomach the way that it did. "Of course! You are somehow better at makin' it than I, a true conundrum considering how long I toiled away to achieve my technique." 

You almost didn't notice when his hand cautiously returned to your thigh. 

Almost.

Part Seven

[inspirationdivine]

You Can’t Sit With Us || Lydia and Cece

Timing: Current Parties: @inspirationdivine & @thebickedwitchoftherest Summary: Cece provides Lydia with some much needed security. Warnings: Head trauma tw, stalking reference

Lydia's heart has taken up permanent residence in her throat. It pounded fast as she sat in her kitchen. Thank God the summer sun hung in the sky so long, keeping her safe with every minute of its presence. The doorbell rang, and Lydia used her smartphone to see through the camera who it was. Showtime. Lydia picked up her crutches and slowly, achingly shuffled to the door. She wore a long dressing gown, heavy make up and as much glamour as she could manage. She wouldn't look well, she wouldn't look herself, but the blackened bruises on her face would be hidden, not would she look anything but human. At least, for as long as she could hold it. "Ms Bishop, thank you ever so much for coming as such short notice." Lydia smiled, but no amount of magic could hide the croak in her voice. She hopped aside, careful not to say any invitation.

Cece felt like a call girl, without any of the implied action. She waved at the camera after knocking and readjusted the bag on her shoulder. The thing kept getting heavier and heavier as she added more things to it she deemed necessary. God forbid anyone decided to check her bag. They would probably think she was insane. The woman, who Cece assumed was Lydia, opened the door and Cece sucked in a low whistle. She didn’t look good. She answered on crutches, and despite the makeup and expensive looking robe, it was pretty evident that she was in a rough place. “Anything for a friend.” Cece answered, wondering how it was that Lydia and Remmy had become acquainted in the first place. “You can call me Cece, it’s preferred actually. What should I call you?” The two stood for a long moment before Cece realized that she wasn’t about to get an invitation into the home. “I’m just gonna let myself in then.” Cece leaned forward, talking softly and then pushing past Lydia and into the home. Smart choice though, avoiding words like that. Clearly, Lydia had learned the wrong way. “So a little birdy told me you’ve got some vamp troubles. What’s the story? Ex-lover? Pizza boy? If so, I hope you gave a shitty tip.”

She smiled thinly, nodding at the name. "Lydia will do nicely," she replied, and lead CeCe into her home, slowly, with the loud click of crutches on hardwood. She couldn't, however. Hide the disgust as Cece tried to guess at the causes of the dispute. "Nothing worth sharing. I just need to know that he won't ever walk back in again." Lydia squeezed her eyes shut from the sun. Bright light was a terrible thing. She grabbed for the sunglasses she kept on a nearby counter, and hoped Cece wouldn't question it. At least the place was clean, Lydia thought. Nothing on display. There was a couch sized gap in the living room, but beyond that, not much to be concerned about. "I don't know how it works. Your spell, I mean. Where do you need to set up? Does it work for the entire house or do you need to do it at each door? Because I have a lot of houses." Lydia frowned, pinching her nose. "I mean I have a lot of doors. Just the one house to spell. Do you- do you want a drink, uh- a coffee or something?" 

Cece got the message. Lydia wasn’t much of a conversationalist it seemed. At least not regarding the vampire she wanted to be permanently evicted from her house. “Point taken. Well, no vampires will be coming back through this door unless they’re paying rent.” Cece began unpacking things from her bag. Multiple bottles of water, a tuft of sage, and the ever spell important candles. She eyed the sunglasses, wondering if Lydia had spent the night coping with her problems. Cece had her own pair of hangover sunglasses she dusted off and fashioned from time to time. “The spell? Piece of cake. I can set up right here. I’ll just have to circle your house a couple of times, but I’ll do the actual spell near the front door. It’ll work for the whole house, and all vampires. Unless you just have one you want to keep out.” Cece grabbed two bottles of water from her bag and carried them over with her to Lydia. “That depends. Do you have wine? Whiskey? Anything alcohol actually.” Cece questioned, never one to turn down a free drink if offered, “Holy water” Cece held the bottle up and shook it for clarification, “I’m gonna go and sprinkle this around the house. Be right back.”

"Right, right of course." Lydia nodded weakly. Wine was doable. While she couldn't drink it right now, she had plenty in stock, and might even enjoy briefly discussing it. Until she imagined bending down or crouching to reach into the wine cooler, and she felt electricity shoot down her spine. But the whiskey was in the cupboard, just below eye level. "Whiskey I can do," she agreed. "See you in a little." Considering that Lydia's home contained her entire restoration studio, her luscious living space, work studios for Sammy and Chloe, and multiple spare bedrooms, it was a large mansion, so she might not be back immediately. Lydia hobbled to the kitchen, moving on automatic as she got out the glass, grabbed the whiskey. It wasn't until she'd finished pouring the whiskey that she realised she has gotten Cece a wine glass rather than a whiskey one, and had poured her a wine portion size of whiskey. She could repour it, but that simple effort was suddenly overwhelming, as Lydia staggered into a kitchen chair, cradling her head between her hands. She stayed there until she heard footsteps back in the hallway, her heart plunging into a panic as she sat upright a little too fast. "Cece?"

“Whiskey it is!” Cece answered before jogging out the door with her bottles of water. The house was massive, far larger than Cece’s own house. This town managed to have an impressive amount of large homes and rich people for its size. Clearly, she should have worn more comfortable shoes today. Curse her for matching the shoes with the outfit. She used her keys to poke a hole in the top of the first bottle of water, squeezing it to spray a stream of holy water into the grass. She began her long trek circling the house, switching bottles once she ran out of the first. Once she had finally circled the yard, she used the small leftover amount of water to spray around the front door. When she went back into the house, Lydia practically jumped. Fuck. Whoever this vampire was, it did a real number on her. “Just me. Don’t freak out.” Cece held up the empty bottles and abandoned them on the counter, noticing the wine glass full of whiskey, “Now that’s what I’m talking about. I like you.” She grinned making a beeline for the glass and taking a long drink from it. “Part one done. Ready for part two? We get to burn some sage, light some candles. Really sets a nice ambience.”

If Lydia had looked pale before, she might have been mistaken for a Banshee now, all the blood drained from her face. She dropped back into her seat, shoulders low, back hunched. She eyed the empty holy water bottles, and swallowed as she realised that it might have just been water, and she wouldn’t know until she tried. It occurred to her, quickly, that she didn’t have any vampiric friends that she’d invited in her home, no one to test with until he tried again. Lydia swallowed, looking back up at Cece with a small smile. “Let’s pretend that was entirely deliberate, shall we?” The smile immediately faltered as Cece told her the next step. “Does that… require my involvement? I’m not feeling too well, I’d rather just sit here.”

“I’m great at pretending,” Cece swirled the glass as if it was wine in it instead and took another sip. Lydia didn’t seem up to the task of helping out with the spell, which wasn’t that big of a deal. The spell was simple enough, it just involved a certain amount of Christian iconography that Cece didn’t typically work with. “You sit there and look pretty, I got this.” Cece grabbed the sage and moved towards the door. She lit a candle and began the incantation, using the candle’s flame to light the sage in a dish. As she spoke, the smoke from the sage began thickening, turning a dark red color as the spell began working it’s literal magic. Cece didn’t stop the chanting until the the smoke began to lighten, turning its regular color and eventually burning down completely. Then, Cece dipped her index and middle fingers into the bowl, gathering a bit of ash on her finger tips and using it to draw a crude outline of a cross on the front door. After that, she made her way back to her bag and dropped off the bowl of sage and candle and wiped her hands clean. “Leave that cross up for a few hours and you should be vampire free.”

“That’s what I’m best at,” Lydia said drily, feeling anything but pretty as some beat drums inside her brain. She listened carefully as Cece moved around the downstairs, if only because keeping her eyes open was harder and harder by the minute. The sage smelled thick and heavy, lingering in her nose and irritated throat. When Cece came back, Lydia shuddered, her head ringing like thunder, hard as the hit which had caused the concussion. “Wonderful. What is the best way to pay-” Lydia inhaled sharply, then groaned. Her glamour began to falter - her ears grew longer and pointier, her bathrobe filled with the bulk of her wings, and her face slowly gave way to the deep bruising and heavy swelling that she’d been hiding. Her glamour came in and out in patchwork, flickering unevenly on her skin, shrinking her ears and then revealing their  full length again. 

Lydia brought up the discussion of payment and Cece began waving her comment away until something flickered. It had been so quick that Cece wasn’t sure she had actually seen anything at first. Until it began happening again. It was like a glitch in a computer program, flickering in different areas of Lydia’s body. They were just flashes, too hard to be able to make anything out clearly. But it was enough for Cece to figure some things out. This was a glamour. Which meant that Lydia was hiding something nonhuman. From the few features that she could see, incredibly pale skin, long nonhuman ears. Something that could pass for human from far away, but the closer one got features would start seeming irregular. “Well that’s different.” Cece tilted her head, studying the woman and questioning her next move. Clearly, the woman didn’t want her true form revealed or she wouldn’t have been glamored. What did that mean for their conversation? Cece was here to do Remmy a favor. She was hardly in the mood to brawl it out with a mutual friend. Best to proceed with caution. “Your glamor seems fucked up. You do that yourself, or is it some kind of bewitched jewelry?”

“What’s different? Oh- Oh shit.” Lydia didn’t even realise that her glamour was falling out of place until Cece said something, but then she wasn’t much in the mood for noticing much of anything at all. The headache roared inside her like one of Jared’s beasts. Ringing in her eyes, burning under her eyelids. Inescapable. Lydia scrabbled in her purse for the decoction of liverwort and stray sod, cringing at the mulchy texture. It helped, just enough for her to yank her glamour back on, although if anyone had looked at her skin too closely they would notice the lack of veins and imperfections. “My own. My mistake, you should never have seen that.”

That had been a panicked response. Cece couldn’t exactly blame her. Being a witch came with it’s perks, and the main perk was that in all other aspects she was a normal human. To avoid detection the only thing she had to do was not do spells in front of others. If she had been something else, something that looked less like the status quo, she would probably be a little panicked if her disguise had failed in front of a total stranger too. Luckily for Lydia, Cece was pretty chill about that sort of stuff. Hopefully for Cece, Lydia took notice to that and didn’t get defensive. Or aggressive. “Seen what?” Cece questioned, rifling around in her purse, “Even if I did see something, my lips are sealed.” Cece found her notepad and pulled it free, scribbling down her cell number and holding it out towards her, “I know you have my online information, but here’s my cell. Call me if you need anything else or if you have any more troubles with that vampire. I could pencil in a count Chocula ass whopping pretty quickly.” Cece hopped back and forth on her feet, throwing a fake punch and acting as though she were in the middle of a boxing ring.

Lydia squeezed her eyes shut, rubbing her forehead, and didn’t even think to try to promise bind Cece to her words. “I appreciate that. Like I said, I’ll… pay you back in kind.” She peeked open her eyes as paper was rustled near her face. She nodded, eyes flicking over the numbers as she took none of it in. “Thank you,”she said again, words she so rarely spoke ever now coming out of her lips quite quickly. “He’s- Well, I don’t know that he’d appreciate being called count Chocula.” Her lips quirked. At the very least, Remmy had sent her a fun human. Maybe she could ea- hmmm maybe not.  “You’re very sweet. Thank you.”

Cece got the feeling that it was time to let the woman rest. She seemed even less focused than she had been when Cece first got here. Keeping up the glamor in her current state probably took a lot of energy. “This was a favor for a friend. You don’t owe me anything.” Cece waves the offer of payment away and flung her bag over her shoulder. “Well I don’t appreciate a vampire roughing up a mutual friend. Frankly, I don’t give a damn what he thinks.” All packed up, Cece was ready to split and let the woman get some rest. Luckily for her, she didn’t need to worry about any blood sucking visitors making an unwelcome entrance. “Since you’re all set, I’m gonna head out, okay? Looks like you could use some sleep.” 

[lovemesomesurveys]

The last time you were in the fridge, what were you looking for? Shredded cheese.

Do you like clowns? Just Pennywise.

Have you answered all of these questions honestly so far? Uh, we were just two questions in and they were simple questions, no need to lie about what I got out of my fridge and whether I like clowns lol.

What's the third text in your inbox? Doesn’t work that way.

Are you listening to anything at the moment? An ASMR video.

Do you twitch when your falling asleep? >> Yeah, sometimes. Or I have that sudden falling feeling and jerk awake. <<< Ugh, same. I hate that.

Are your dishes in the dishwasher clean or dirty? Clean.

Are you at home or with friends more often? I’m always at home, even before the quarantine/lockdown stuff began. For the past few years, actually. 

When is the last time you were on a bicycle? Never.

What have you eaten today? So far just ramen.

Would you date someone 15 years older than you? I don’t think so.

Do you own a strapless bra? Yeah.

Does the person you like know it? I don’t like anyone in that way.

Did anything brighten up your day today? It’s only 5 in the morning, not a whole lot as happening. I don’t see much happening later on either, though.

How are you feeling at this exact moment? Tired.

Are you someone who worries too often? Yepppp.

If you could date somebody who would it be? No one right now.

Do you ever wonder how other people see you? Sometimes, but it scares me. I’d really rather not know.

What is one good thing you're known for? I don’t know.

How about one bad thing? I don’t know.

Are you taller than most? >> Most children, yeah. LOL <<< Ha, same. 

When was the last time you sang an ENTIRE song? It’s been a few days since I’ve listened to music.

Are you the type of person who likes to be out or home? I like to be at home, which like I said is where I spend all my time.

What time do you normally go to bed? Between 7 and 8AM. :X

What is one thing that is currently bothering you? The usual things.

What did you do today? So far just ate ramen, watched some YouTube videos, went on Tumblr, did surveys, played some Animal Crossing, and listened to ASMR videos.

Do you consider yourself to be attractive? Nope.

What was the last thing that you drank? Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink.

Is anything annoying you now? Yes.

Has anyone ever said i love you to you and not meant it? I’m sure. Some people throw those words around too easily.

Do you regret going out with the last person you did? No.

Do you realize it when you curse? Yeah. I don’t curse often, so when I do it really stands out.

When was the last time you showered? Yesterday.

Who did you last talk to in person? My brother.

Do you ever have days where you just don't do anything? I don’t do much day to day, but yes there’s days where I’m really having a hard time or don’t feel and I don’t feel up to doing anything besides lie down, sleep, and stare at the TV.

Have you ever been extremely tired but refused to go to sleep? Yes. I do that often for some reason.

What is your favorite episode of True Life, if you have one at all? I’ve seen some episodes of that here and there, but I can’t think of any particular episode at the moment. I know there’s news episodes coming out about people’s experience in quarantine.

Have you ever experienced something paranormal? No.

What's the longest amount of time you've been stuck in traffic? A couple hours. I don’t even like spending a few minutes being stuck in bumper to bumper traffic.

Best field trip experience? I loved all the field trips as a kid.

Have you ever been to New York City? No, but I’ve always wanted to go.

If so, is it all its cracked up to be?

What is the most amount of money you've spent on a meal before? Hmm. Probably like $50. It was a nice, pricey restaurant. 

What museums have you visited, if any? Several.

Have you ever had a group project and one of your partners bailed on you? Yes. I hated group projects, they added way more stress. 

What's your worst traveling experience? The drive to and from Idaho to California back in 2010. We went to Idaho to see my grandpa who was very sick and his wife told us he didn’t have much time left, so my parents, brother, and I made the 12+ drive there. We left at night and it was during the wintertime, so we drove through snowy, dangerous conditions, something we’re not used to because it doesn’t snow where we live. The trip back home was worse because we were all very emotional and tired and our patience was real thin. It was a rough trip back home. At one point during the night we had to find a hotel because the roads were too slippery and dangerous to drive on from the snow and because a lot of people had to do the same, it was hard finding somewhere. We fortunately got a one bed room and made it work, with some of us sleeping on the floor. Something that I don’t want to get into happened that night that made me extremely angry and upset to the point I was literally shaking and that is not normal for me. 

Sims 1, 2, or 3? Why? Sims 3 out of those options, but Sims 4 over all of ‘em.

Have you ever dealt with noisy neighbors or roommates? How did that go? Yeah, we’ve had a few noisy neighbors over the years. The current neighbors we have we had an issue with their dogs barking excessively. They left them outside all day and they just barked all the time. We eventually had to say something and thankfully we got things sorted out. 

Who was (or is) the teacher that gave you the hardest time in school? I had 2 horrible math teachers in community college, but otherwise I never had any issues with my teachers.

Best muffin you've ever had? I love banana muffins (no nut), lemon poppyseed, and blueberry muffins. Have you ever taken a woodshop class? For an elective in middle school.

If so, was it required? No, it was an elective. <<<

How much time do you spend on Facebook, if you have one? I go on there for a few minutes at at a time a few times a day. 

What area of math are you best at? Worst? I was always horrible at math.

How do you feel when you meet someone with the same music taste as you? It’s cool to bond over shared interests. @gic-ga and I just recently obsessed over Linkin Park together haha.

What is the strangest thing you've ever seen outside of your house? A freakin’ bat flying around one night. That’s most definitely not a common sighting here. I had never seen or heard of any such sighting prior to that. It was crazy.

Do you believe in luck? Why or why not? No.

How often do you "half-ass" things (put little effort in)? These past few years I haven’t put much ass at all into things. :/

Do you ever feel self-conscious when you eat around other people? Yes.

Has a teacher ever made you hate yourself/your work? Those 2 awful math professors I mentioned before made me feel even worse about not understanding the material.

How reliable is your internet connection? Very. There’s very rarely an issue.

Have you ever missed a meeting/event that was required/necessary? No.

What's something that makes you incredibly nervous? Uh, a lot of things. That’s how I am.

What's the latest you've ever stayed up to finish homework/a project? Many late nights or early mornings in college.

If you don't have glasses, how would you feel if you had to get them?

If you do have glasses, how would you feel if you didn't need them anymore? I honestly like my glasses. I’ve had to wear them since I was 9, they’re apart of me. I look and feel weird without ‘em.

How many vegetarians do you know? I’m not sure. 

Have you ever considered going to art school? No. I have no artistic talents or abilities. I never had the interest in trying just a class either, like with a drawing class or something, so definitely not an art school, a school devoted to the arts.

Is there anyone in your life who consistently angers you? Myself.

How quickly can you write an essay? For me I struggled with getting started, but once I did I’d get in my groove.

Have you ever had problems falling asleep in class? No.

Have you ever been on the barrier or front row at a concert? No. I always get the nosebleeds seats cause that’s where the handicap seating tends to be. They’re cheaper up there; though, so hey.

If you have a job, who is your least favorite coworker/manager?

Favorite episode of Spongebob? I don’t have a favorite. I’ve seen episodes cause my younger brother and cousins watched it all the time, but I was never really into it myself.

Do you have any silly/odd emotional connections to anything/anyone? To inanimate objects cause of memories attached to them. Like, I have a hard time getting rid of anything.

Are your parents supportive of you? Yes.

How often do you take the train to go places? Never.

Do you play with your phone in awkward situations? Ha, yeah.

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Three Hundred Thirty-Eight: No Remorse ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Hyūga Hinata, Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura ] [ SasuHina ] [ Verse: A Light Amongst Shadows ] [ AO3 Link ]

It’s one of the questions he’s asked most often...to the point where he’s become - quite frankly - rather exasperated with it.

“Do you regret it?”

‘It’ being a rather vague term, but one way or another, the word typically refers to any or all events from the time he left Konoha, to when he was dragged back. From the moment he’s back within the village, it seems to be the one thing anyone really cares to know about the time he spent outside it.

The simple answer is...no.

But most people aren’t satisfied with that. If he tells them no, and doesn’t explain...they get that look. One that tells him that he really should regret it. That he should be ashamed of the things he did.

At first, such a response doesn’t really bother him. He honestly couldn’t give less of a shit what anyone in Konoha thinks about him, really. Their blind loyalty to a place that’s - in actuality - committed a number of crimes, not just those regarding his clan, leaves him with a rather unfavorable opinion of most of them. Granted, your typical shinobi - let alone civilian - hardly knows about Konoha’s wrongdoings. But even those who do - his team, primarily - don’t really seem to have much concern about confronting them.

Something he isn’t going to let slide.

But that’s to be handled later. For now, he’s still stuck dealing with the dredge of the villagers’ opinions.

Because in reality...he doesn’t regret a single thing he did. Some things he might have done differently given his knowledge...but he also knows there’s no point in such thoughts. There’s no changing the past. And even if there were...the unknown outcomes of such changes may very well be even harder to cope with than his current circumstances.

He does, admittedly, regret killing Itachi. But he also knows it was his brother’s wish: his attempt to keep the peace, keep Sasuke blinded to the dark truths of their village...and end his own suffering. But the elder brother’s death - and the revelations Sasuke received after, from both Obito and Itachi himself - led him to the truth. To his current path.

And he can’t bring himself to regret that.

He doesn’t regret killing Orochimaru. Or his later decision to revive the snake sannin. Getting his teacher out of the way was necessary...just as much as it was to later revive them. Part of him may very well think that having the serpent alive is a risk...but it also was one that, overall, panned out in their favor. Orochimaru has done despicable things...but so too were they instrumental in overcoming obstacles.

Taka...is a difficult subject. Despite his best efforts to remain neutral toward them, there was no fully killing his need to protect people - to connect with them. As much as Karin annoys him, as much as Suigetsu prods at him, and as closely as he has to watch Jūgo...he couldn’t have done what he did without them. They aren’t exactly...friends. He can’t bring himself to call them that, but friend is a difficult subject for him. They’re an odd...in-between.

He certainly doesn’t regret killing Danzō. While he knows the rest of the council won’t receive the same fate - and maybe they don’t quite deserve it like the head of Root did - their actions were the direct allowance of the massacre. Danzō’s greed for their power and his want to remove them from his path was something Sasuke could never forgive - never let go unaddressed.

He had to die.

So, in truth...while some things have been harder for Sasuke to accept than others...he’s had to, really. He’d go mad overthinking it, doubting it all, asking ‘what if’ whenever it gets too quiet. He made his bed, and he’ll lie in it. There’s no getting his clan back. His brother back. His life back.

This is his reality. Regretting it will bring him no peace...no justice.

All he can do now...is move forward.

“Ah -!”

Dragged into a group outing, Sasuke pauses and glances over as one of their troupe seems to stagger. It’s currently him, Sakura, Naruto, and Hinata. The Hyūga has been hanging around the rather-fragmented team seven as of late. And it’s she who seems to crumple mid-step.

Being the fastest among them, it’s Sasuke who reacts first. With an arm around her waist, he keeps her on her feet, dark brows furrowing. There’s a rather violent ripple in her chakra.

Something’s wrong.

“Sakura,” he barks, bluntly but not unkindly.

Noticing as much herself, the rosette wastes no time in approaching. As Sasuke eases Hinata to sit (a bit difficult to do, given their position in the crowded shopping district), Naruto follows up.

“Hinata-chan! What’s wrong?”

“I...I’m fine,” she insists, tone a bit wispy as Sakura puts a hand to her chest, chakra shifting to a jade shade. “It’s just...m-my chest.”

“Your heart? Or your scar?”

“Heart…”

“When was your last cardiology appointment?” Sakura asks, immediately in medic mode.

Sasuke, serving as a bit of a chair at the moment, lets his brow furrow. Wait...her heart? She’s only seventeen, why would she -?

...oh...now he remembers. Their chūnin exams. Her spar against Neji. The blow to her chest that stopped the organ and required her to be evacuated to the hospital. He remembers hearing about her extensive hospital stay, and the weeks of therapy it took to strengthen her heart.

She’d nearly died that day.

“About, um…” She pauses to think. “...two months ago. Everything’s fine. It just f-flares up sometimes. I’ve been told it’s normal, I just need to rest.”

Sakura doesn’t look fully convinced, but relents. “...we better get you home.”

“But -?”

“We’re not about to keep dragging you around when you feel like this!”

“I don’t want to r-ruin it…”

“...I’ll take her home,” Sasuke then offers. “I’m not contributing much as it is. You two stay and finish up. I’ll make sure she gets there safe.”

For a brief moment, something flickers across Sakura’s face. “...all right. But if anything happens, you take her straight to the hospital! No ifs, ands, or buts!”

Hinata almost seems to pout, but doesn’t argue. “...I’m sorry, Sakura-chan.”

“Oh, please - a little outing is a lot less important than your health. Go get some rest. We’ll see you again soon, okay? Take it easy!”

“...I will…” Letting Sasuke carefully haul her back to her feet, Hinata starts leading the way back to her clan’s grounds.

Sasuke keeps his gaze on her from the corner of his unveiled eye, watching for any signs she’s worsening. She seems a bit out of breath, but otherwise passable enough. “...is this from the chūnin exams?”

With a small, weary sigh...Hinata nods. “...my heart is healed, but every so often I have a bout of arrhythmia. It’s never been anything serious, not since my therapy ended. It’s just something I have to deal with. Everyone always makes it so dramatic…”

“People worry about you. And if Sakura’s worried...there’s surely reason to be.”

“It’s been four years. I r-really don’t think I’m going to relapse. My primary medic says I’m fine, and she’s as diligent as they come. I keep up my appointments...everything else is just unnecessary fuss.”

“...all right, then.” He’s not about to argue. But then the other part of Sakura’s questioning surfaces.

“...Sakura said something about a scar…?”

To his surprise, she actually pauses. “...yes.”

He too slows to a stop. “...what was that from?” He likely has no idea - he was gone for quite some time, and odds are he just wasn’t around when it happened.

“...when Akatsuki attacked Konoha, I interfered with Naruto-kun’s fight against their leader.”

Subtly, his eye widens.

“I knew I wasn’t any match...mostly I just w-wanted to be a distraction. Maybe help free him so he could continue the fight. But I was overpowered before he could get loose, and the enemy impaled me with one of his black rods.”

At her words, a memory surfaces: that of Madara turning Tobirama into a pincushion with rods like that. Right before he -

“It went into my side, and...caused a lot of damage. Due to the rush, it was healed over very quickly, and I had a few c-complications that had to be fixed later with further surgeries. The scarring is a bit tight, so...sometimes I have trouble t-twisting my torso. I do yoga and kata to help with flexibility, but...it twinges sometimes. Sakura-chan likely thought that might have been what had me flinch.”

Sasuke considers her for a long moment. They’re still stopped in the middle of a road, currently empty beyond the two of them. “...you got that trying to help Naruto?”

“...yes. After I was stabbed, he flew into a rage...utilized his bijū and got free.”

“...I didn’t realize he cared about you that much.” It’s a blunt statement, but an honest one. From what he can remember...Naruto always called her strange. While Sasuke (and just about everyone else) could see it was due to her crush on him...the blond was always blind.

Hinata, however, doesn’t flinch. Instead, her head bows slightly. “...that was the day I told him I loved him. I don’t k-know if that had anything to do with it. He never mentioned it after that.”

“...wait.” Disbelief slackens his face. “...you confessed to him, risked your life for him...and he said nothing?”

“T-there was a lot more to consider - Akatsuki, the village, and -”

“But even after all this time...he hasn’t answered you?”

“...not directly.” Her tone quiets. “...but I t-think his reply is rather...o-obvious.”

“...that stupid prick,” Sasuke mutters.

“It w-wasn’t his -”

“You don’t regret it?”

His interruption makes her hesitate.

“...nothing? No remorse? I saw what you did during the war...you tried to do it again. All this effort doesn’t feel...wasted?”

She stares at him, expression unreadable. “...Naruto-kun doesn’t feel how I felt. And I h-hardly want him to force it, or...or lie. That doesn’t mean I regret doing what I did. I wanted to protect him. I w-wanted to prove I was strong enough to stand beside him. I might not love him anymore...maybe I never did. Not truly. But I can’t regret risking my own life for someone I care about. Even if we aren’t right for each other...I still care. I still want him safe, and happy. If the choice came up again...I wouldn’t hesitate. Naruto-kun is precious to me. I might not be what I wanted to be to him...but I’m still his friend. His comrade. So no...I don’t regret my choices.” Unblinking, she doesn’t censor herself. “...I thought y-you of all people would understand.”

For some reason...her words sting in a way he doesn’t expect. But rather than feel a need to lash out, or reply with snark...he recoils, suddenly unsure. He never thought her capable of such a remark.

When it’s clear he isn’t going to rebuke, she sighs. “...I’ve given a lot for other people. But I’d never take any of it back. Just because it’s left me in a deficit doesn’t mean I should regret it. I still feel like I made the right choices...even if others might disagree. They’re mine to make...and mine alone.”

“...fair enough.”

A pause.

“...you don’t have to walk me back, I’ll be fine. You probably want to go home.”

“It’s not that far.” And he isn’t about to walk away from her rather bold statements. “Besides, Sakura will skin me alive if she finds out I left.”

“...all right.”

They don’t exchange any more words on the way, and Hinata turns back as she passes through the compound gate. “...have a good evening, Sasuke-kun.”

“You too. Get some rest. Remember, doctor’s orders.”

To his surprise, she manages a smile. “I will.” With that, she turns and soon disappears.

Mind full of thoughts he had no intention of entertaining, Sasuke eventually sighs...and turns back toward home.

                                                          .oOo.

     This isn't QUITE what I want it to be, but...it's late and I don't have time to redo or tinker xD      Sasuke, in my mind, fully accepts all of his decisions. Maybe a bit less out of actually finding them to be the best he could have done...and more just doing so for his own peace of mind. Sure, he has things he know he could have done better, but...only AFTER seeing how they played out. For his sanity's sake, he can't regret them.      Hinata, on the other hand, feels that she DID do the best she could. And while others might criticize her, especially her actions concerning Naruto, she doesn't regret them. Just because their bond didn't pan out how she'd wanted doesn't mean she'd NOT do her best to help him. He still matters. Her feelings still matter. They've just...changed. But that doesn't change the past, or how she views it.      So, two different interpretations. And I think that's an interesting comparison between them!      ...but it's also 3 am and I'm tired so maybe that's the only reason I'm so rambly xD      Either way, that's all I've got for now, and it's WAY past bedtime lol - thanks for reading!

[rainslayre]

name :   tomioka  giyuu

nickname :   i assume we’re not counting the ones sanemi & iguro have thought of ?

gender :   cis male

romantic orientation :   demi - Needs - to - Experiment & leans more to boys

preferred pet names :  he’s Always awkward about them, no matter from who

relationship status :   single, not quite ready to mingle, and way too Depressed

favorite canon / fandom ship :   / * slaps giyuu with rengoku & uzui & sabito & Very Specifically only with amy’s muzan

favorite crossover ship :   i mean so far i really only have katie’s kagari but god, i can’t believe the first person giyuu ever flirts with on this blog is a Canonical Dead Man

opinion on true love :   ... [my] giyuu WANTS to believe that it exists but ultimately doesn’t. i think giyuu sees that there’s a difference between “true love” versus “genuine love”, yet the two Can be interchangeable but very heavily dependent on what work the relationship has put in already. i don’t think he believes in “love at first sight” or even like HALF of the romantic ideas misturi has running through her head because he believes Real Love is effort. he doesn’t adapt to the typical “oh hey we’re been on five dates already, so now you’re my girlfriend / boyfriend!” but rather finds it much more ideal / romantic(?) to just spend time with someone. give him memories he doesn’t have to feel so complicated about & can look back and smile naturally. no pressure to try impressing the other, no pressure to not seem too or not interested enough  —  just hang out with them and have a good time. i 99% believe giyuu is Always gonna be the second person to fall because he doesn’t think anyone’s ever really gonna see him as someone worth causing an emotional uproar for, depressed timeline or not. but if you honestly somehow get the curse of giyuu falling you first then i am So Damn Sorry for the road you’ll be enduring just to realize what he’s trying to convey.

opinion on love at first sight :   oh fuck i ranted too hard. uh, literally just read the paragraph above please.

how ‘romantic’ are they? :   he certainly isn’t the best nor the most ecstatic about romance in general, but his partner(s) will DEFINITELY feel their heart screaming so long as you recognize the efforts he puts into thing. he's much more of a “it’s about the details & little things that show importance” kinda guy.

ideal physical traits :   don’t be a demon.

ideal personality traits :   i don’t think his heart (and whatever’s suppose to be a brain in him up there) can handle tsunderes, anyone who can handle his silence & get a feel for whatever he tries conveying in As Little Words As Possible would definitely be a plus but That’s Gonna Require Work y’all, and uh ... i don’t think he has a type to begin with because you either Pass Or Fail his standards of giving a shit about in general. BUT this would be something he’d know if he just Experimented With People :  he would so pick up the insecurity of his partner thinking he doesn’t care. as you go through the rest of this list, i Repeatedly state that his standards don’t exist (or at least they’re not anything specific) and if The Other thinks he no longer has an interest in them & if you basically don’t tell him Upfront about what’s wrong, he’ll go head - first into a spiral of anxiety overthinking Everything he’s done in like the past 72+ hours. as much as everyone can Totally see his depression & make memes out of it, his anxiety canonically is actually WORSE than his depression AND I’M SO SAD THAT NO ONE EVER SEEMS TO BRING THIS UP. don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a rom - drama series where Oh No, Misunderstandings Are Happening And Thus We’re Gonna Spend 3 Whole Episodes Just To Finish Part 1 but ... for someone who doesn’t like speaking a lot because of how much he KNOWS he sucks at holding a conversation, communication is like THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR to keep him and his mental health from drowning underneath.

unattractive physical traits :   i’d be lying if i said He TOTALLY Doesn’t Care because That’s Like Asking A(n Actually Good) Mother To Pick Her Favorite (Actually Decent) Child. but so long as he gets to know you Personally will your personality outshine however you look like.

unattractive personality traits :   i mean just don’t be a dick

ideal date :   so long as it has a “netflix & chill” kinda vibe with the person he’s spending time with, he doesn’t really care.

do they have a type? :   i just said “don’t be a dick”.

average relationship length :   / * gestures @ sabito  I JOKE but uh, nah, he’s the kind of person who takes FOREVER to start with & travels rather slowly with. but that also means he’s the kind of guy who’ll latch on for Life (i mean unless something happens that causes for the relationship to break one way or another but uh Yeah)

preferred non-sexual intimacy :   just enjoy the moment & the time you get together. even a simple Take - Out / Leftovers For Dinner (Because We’re Too Tired To Cook) date would be enough. (except shopping. never drag him out for a shopping date)

commitment level :   he’ll be a real damn piece of work but if you stick with him, you’ll be rewarded with a lifetime with this loser (i mean if that’s really what you want your endgame to be but Alright)

opinion of public affection :   instead more like “secret but in public” kinds of affection. like, holding two fingers onto the other person’s fingers discreetly. or hovering your finger(s) from his shoulder to his collarbone to his neck and then for a second Almost tipping / holding at his chin only to naturally Yet Quickly draw your whole hand away from him.  YEA H !!!  but yeah nothing like Kissing In The Mall or he’s gonna be way too embarrassed and you can drive yourself home then, dammit.

past relationships? :   NO MATTER THE VERSE, I LOVE THE IDEA OF SABITO BEING SOMEONE HE ONCE FELL IN LOVE WITH. whether the relationship ends up with sabito dead or they Return To Being JUST Friends, it’s a really nice experience to slap on him if i can just so he’s not Completely Oblivious. (and also potentially for Angst Factors and/or depending how Vital that point in his life may become)

tagged by :   @ainoken ! tagging :   @flmbynt ,   @danceablaze ,   @anroji ,   and   @galebreath .   if anyone else wants to ponder long about this then i enable u to do it, you cowards .

[whenjoshisjoseph]

13 Things Best Bros Do Together (+1 Thing They Don’t): Chapter 6

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“As heroes, you will be expected to fight whilst defending a helpless victim,” Aizawa tells Class 1-A, who are huddled around in a circle in the centre of the training grounds. “Protecting another affects your fighting style, and this exercise is is designed to test your capacity to do that.

“You will be split up into partners. The first run of this exercise will be a test run, and then we’ll rotate partners, who you’ll be tested alongside with.”

“Sir!” Iida interjects, and Bakugou rolls his eyes in irritation. Every single fucking time , he thinks. “How does the exercise work, exactly?” Seems Aizawa’s pretty fed up of it, too. Bakugou can tell , even if the dark haired teacher keeps his cool.

“Iida, please let me finish before you ask any questions. Each pair will be up against another. Only one of the two can use their quirk, the other being the ‘helpless victim’. If I see the designated victim using their quirk, I will cancel it out, and they will immediately fail this exercise, understood?” Aizawa warns.

“Yes, sir!” the class replies in unison. Apart from Bakugou, anyway. He's not playing a fucking victim, no matter what.

“Each team will also have a orb that the ‘victim’ will hold. The aim of each team is to acquire the orb from the opposite team, whilst ensuring that the ‘victim’ sustains minimal damage. As for the teams…” As the teacher begins to read from a list, Bakugou tunes the man out. He only has to pay attention when his name is called. Besides, he doesn’t like the sound of this activity. Of course, it’s no challenge, but he doesn’t like working with the dumbasses in this class. Except maybe Kirishima, sometimes. But they might not get paired up together.

“Bakugou will be with Midoriya for the first rotation, versus Todoroki, who will be partnered with Aoyama. Sero will be with…” Aizawa continues.

Fuck it. Bloody fuck it, of course he’s got shitty Deku and his fucking boyfriend.

“I will leave it up to you all to decide who plays the victim, and who plays the hero. Considering that we’re doing this exercise two times, it would be preferable to play each role once, but there is no obligation to.

“Collect your orbs from that box,” Aizawa instructs, “and find a space for you and your opponents to work in. You can begin as soon as you’re ready; smash the orb once you’ve acquired it to inform me you’re done. Everyone has a twenty minute time limit, starting now.”

Bakugou sees the smaller boy walk to the box and collect an orb, which fits neatly in his scarred hands. The blonde twitches slightly as Deku gestures for him to come over.

“I thought you’d want me to play the victim?” the green haired one asks as he stops in front of him.

“Tch, fucking obviously, Deku,” Bakugou snarls. “You better stay out of my fucking way.” Deku gives him a nervous thumbs up and jogs to where Todoroki and Aoyama are waiting. Aoyama sits on the smooth ground, whilst Todoroki stands in front of him, braced for the first attack.

He feels Deku plop down on the ground behind him, which means they’re ready to roll. And don’t get him wrong, Bakugou doesn’t waste a single second. Todoroki doesn’t get so much as a simple signal when suddenly Bakugou is crashing into him. Had it been anyone else, they would’ve been caught by surprise. However, Todoroki deflects Bakugou with a simple wall of ice.

Weaker than usual , Bakugou notes as he smashes through it. It must be in some effort to keep Aoyama safe; Todoroki’s conserving his strength rather than trying to full-on defeat him.

Which just makes it even easier for Bakugou.

Fuck protecting the shitty nerd , Bakugou thinks. It’s going to be over a lot quicker if he can get the damn orb. Bakugou blasts deftly at Todoroki, who lunges out of the way, leaving Aoyama in the open. Perfect .

But before his second blast can fully get through to the glittery hero, another wall of ice is up, just in time to stop any real damage from being done. But he’s sure he’s scratched him, which is enough for now. Bakugou reels back in for another attack, when the wall disappears.

He doesn’t know why, but Aoyama’s vulnerable, and that’s all that fucking matters now. He’s about to snatch the orb from a slightly cowering Aoyama when he hears someone call his name.

“Kacchan! Help me!” Bakugou swivels to see Todoroki hovering over Deku, who’s looking at Bakugou with wide eyes. Bakugou pauses, and Deku realises what Bakugou’s plan is - to leave him at the mercy of Todoroki in the hope that he’ll have snatched the orb from Aoyama in time to prevent any real damage.

The half and half bastard’s left side is ablaze, and just as he makes a move to strike, Deku chokes out:

“Baby, please-” The flames waver for a split second, and Bakugou is instantly grabbing the orb from Aoyama’s grasp and smashing it.

“Wait, no!” Aoyama yells, as a blue haze wafts up.

“We fucking got you, bastard,” Bakugou taunts Todoroki as he strides towards Deku, but the icyhot idiot completely fucking ignores Bakugou, instead pulling on Deku’s ear and whispering something in his ear that makes him go bright red.

“I-I didn’t mean to, I swear-” Deku babbles, going after Todoroki as he walks away. Bakugou swears he hears something along the lines of ‘please, we can’t do that tonight’, at which point he stops listening, because honestly, he doesn’t want to fucking know whatever lewd threat Todoroki must’ve made.

Instead, he returns to Aizawa using a different route, and sits on the opposite side of the bench to the couple as he waits for everyone else to finish. God, but they’re all so fucking slow . He tries searching out Kirishima to entertain himself, but Shitty Hair is nowhere nearby. If he’s getting hurt right now, Bakugou’s going to fucking kill him or whoever's meant to be looking after him.

*

“Most of you clearly need to learn to be more aware of the person you’re protecting,” Aizawa informs them as they’re huddled around again.

Bakugou had been glad that Kirishima seemed unscathed as he'd sat down next to him five minutes before the time limit for the first round was up. Mina had done a halfway decent job protecting him, then; maybe he could yell at her a little less the next time they interacted, although she had a fucking annoying habit of making every single thing suggestive or some shit.

“-and supplementary lessons will be required for anyone who doesn’t pass this time round.” Iida raises a hand.

“Yes, Iida?” Aizawa asks. Bakugou’s waiting for the day the teacher snaps; he’s sure it’ll be fucking hilarious.

“What if neither teams are able to acquire the orb?” he asks.

“That’s a sensible question, Iida. In that case, you will be assessed on which ‘victim’ has sustained the least damage. Now, as for the teams this time round-”

As he waits for his name to be called, Bakugou lets his eyes wander around the group to see who else has been hurt, but he doesn’t get very far before he lands on Kirishima again, looking his best friend up and down. The redhead’s superhero costume makes sense, but it doesn’t mean Bakugou understands it. Is it even allowed for someone to be showing that much skin? He should fucking cover up more, or he’s going to be distracting whoever the fuck he’s working with when he becomes a pro.

He drags his gaze away from Kirishima’s body as his name is called.

“Tokoyami and Mina will be partnered up against Bakugou and Kirishima, with Iida and Midoriya facing…”

He supposes this is a best case scenario, seeing as he'd wanted Kirishima as a partner anyway. And he can take both Mina and Tokoyami on pretty fucking easily, so this isn’t going to cause a problem, whichever one's attacking him.

“I hope that you’ve all learnt from your first round, and that you apply improved tactics this time round. Begin when you’re ready. The time limit is still twenty minutes, which starts now,” Aizawa dismisses.

Kirishima is immediately next to Bakugou, giving him a light friendly punch to the arm.

“I’m pretty lucky to have the strongest guy protecting me, huh?” Kirishima asks, already knowing Bakugou wants to fight.

“You fucking bet,” he grins in reply.

*

“What the fuck ?” Bakugou screeches as he leaps over another one of Tokoyami's swings.

The fucker's gotten stronger , he realises as he blasts towards the offending arm. Since their fight at the Sports Festival, he must've worked on something to make sure light wouldn't affect Dark Shadow too much.

So he’s fucking fused himself with the bloody shadow.

Bakugou could still easily destroy this motherfucker, but Kirishima is right behind him and no one's going to get a fucking scratch on him.

“Dark Shadow, to the left!” Tokoyami yells, and the bird retreats from Bakugou's attack for a moment before swerving and heading straight for Kirishima.

“Get the fuck away from him!” Bakugou roars, channelling a blast straight at the bird that almost splits it down the middle. The force of the explosion has the ground rumbling, and an after wave sends Mina hurtling backwards; she's sustained some damage. But Dark Shadow cushions her before she faces any serious injury.

The direction of the wave means that Kirishima doesn't get hit, which is fucking lucky; he has to be more fucking careful.

The two opponents face back to each other, circling slowly. If he wasn't in charge of Kirishima, this bastard would've been done for already. But as it is, Bakugou is going to have to wear the other down so Kirishima doesn't get hurt.

But Tokoyami isn't thinking along those lines. He's about to go for a full-on attack. And, as he builds up his Dark Shadow, he leaves Mina to her own devices.

Bakugou can do the same thing he did with Deku and go for the orb, getting there in time to hopefully cut short the attack on Kirishima.

“Go the orb, dude; I'll be fine!” the redhead yells from behind him. Kirishima has a determined expression on his face, a look of a person who's about to sacrifice something. He trusts Bakugou.

But fuck if he's leaving his Kirishima vulnerable.

Dark Shadow comes pummelling down towards his best friend, and Bakugou throws himself if front of the assault, firing out an explosion that slams Tokoyami back into Mina, but the remnants of Dark Shadow mean that the only way he can protect Kirishima now is with his body, so he does.

As the shadow hits his back, the two boys go rolling, but Bakugou's tucked Kirishima against his chest, so he takes the brunt of it, and when the momentum stops, leaving Bakugou hovering over Kirishima, he doesn't wait a second in asking:

“You good, Shitty Hair?” The redhead gives him a dazzling smile.

“I'm awesome, bro; you're so freaking manly!” And then the bastard hugs him, the force of it flipping them over so Bakugou's back is against the fucking floor. If Bakugou wasn't so fucking relieved, he would've shoved him across the training grounds.

Probably .

They look like idiots, embraced on the floor, but that is how Aizawa approaches them, clearing his throat.

“Gentlemen,” he says, and the two leap apart. Fuck fuck fuck, their teacher wasn't meant to see that. But Bakugou's surprised to find that there's a hint of a smile playing on Aizawa's face. Tokoyami and Mina walk over so they can listen to Aizawa too.

“Neither team was able to acquire the orb, so each team has been assessed based on the state of the ‘victim’. Tokoyami and Mina, you will be attending supplementary lessons for the next week, as Kirishima is untouched.”

They both gape.

“Untouched?” Tokoyami exclaims. “But he's paired up with Bakugou of all people, and I sent Dark Shadow after them! Unless Bakugou defended Kirishima with his…” He trails off, silent in his realisation.

“Bakugou was pretty reckless with Midoriya,” Mina muses. “But the one guy in our year who loves winning the most undermined that instinct to protect Kirishima…”

Bakugou's starting to go red.

“It's not fucking like that-”

“Kirishima, you've got a pretty awesome best friend!” Mina concludes, and Bakugou snaps his mouth shut. He's not going to argue with that. Especially not when Kirishima slings an arm around Bakugou's shoulder and affirms:

“Best bros look after each other, and Bakugou is definitely the best of them all.”

Bakugou blinks and looks at his redhead, who’s gazing back at him softly.

Fuck, I like his beautiful eyes , Bakugou thinks, before the thought is accompanied with a panicked,

Wait...what?!

<< First / < Previous /  Next > (I swear there’s more I’ll just upload and link it later asdfghjkl - you can still read all there is on AO3, though!)

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[occupyscifi]

The Partisan Generation

This generation

It was the morning that his daughter airily declared the moon landing a fake news Jewish plot to let liberal scientists run the government that Lenton Ayre realised things had gone a bit far with this generation.

“and, you know its because gun control libtards in the Hollywood elite that we lost the Iraq war” she added, gazing into her eglasses at the endless stream of retweets, status updates and weather pattern like emojis swept over her “because, you know. There were WMD’s  - that’s the truth. Only the cultural Marxists wanna cover it up. There’s like a whole thread on ReddChan about it and all the instagram influencers are saying…”

“honey, I just asked what you were gonna be studying in school today” he replied, cutting her off before she could do the whole ten minute screed on the snowflake liberals that then could segway into a whole monolog that took in every conspiracy theory from JFK to flat earth. Instead he would rather talk about their real education. As someone who was assiduous in his working habits and concerned for his children’s future he had of course taken them out of the local state school and put them into the Musk-Bezos academy that had opened in a refurbished mall just out of town. This was less a matter really of intellectual choice, more that since his own employer was a subsidiary of a subsidiary of a subsidiary of Amazon he could either send his kids to the Inspire! Academy or he could find himself a new job.  

That Lenton would not have minded quite so much, but all his rivals could only offer him the Netflix online-ed course for his two teenagers. That would hardly have been good fathering, he had figured. Although considering his two children’s current subjects of conversation he wondered if it might just have been better to join one of the local Trump Revival churches and get them home schooled. At least he wouldn’t have had to worry about exams, and they would  have a willing audience to talk conspiracy theories with.

“Rani, dude. What is that libtard bullshit?” Ayre’s son retorted, his own smartglasses reflecting the latest news from the hardcore manosphere where he spent most of his time. Since he was wearing his ‘science is my superpower’ tshirt his sister was clearly in a trolling mood “you’ve been sucking down that stupid crap your latest gaywad lametoob boyband crush soyboy has been saying, right? Everyone knows that they’re just a front for Kremlin. Those pretty commie boys want to turn you Stacy’s into their harem so that honest patriots like me can’t get what we’re owed….”

“Kev, you can’t get a girl cause you’re a fucking misogynist incel loser” said his sister quickly “don’t start blaming other people for your problems”

“okay, kids please” said Lenton raising both his hands in what his NLP Yoga teacher had assured him was a calming pose that leant him an air of kindly authority “can we have some calm? You know something a little less partisan at the breakfast table?” lenton scrolled through his own smartglasses looking for non controversial content. It was surprisingly hard “now, can we all agree that congress are a bunch of assholes? Or that kittens are super cute?”

His son opened his mouth to argue

“okay, how about dogs in cars, with their heads out the window?”

Kevin shut his mouth and nodded.

“I mean, I don’t know where it comes from” moaned lenton later at the popup office where he spent his days in online content creation “my daughter spouts anything that comes from the Kremlin via whatever hot youtube boy she’s currently hard crushing on, and my son says anything that some rock hard libertarian science guy says. Neither of them give it a second thought. I don’t know why, cause whenever I say anything they’re on me with laser sight scepticism”

“eh, I blame the technology” complained his colleague as she thumbed through mentions in her livefeed, feeling the desperate need for validation more than the caffeine hit in the cup in her hand “these kids, they wanna be spoonfed everything. I remember when we was their age. We hadda actually google search stuff. If you wanted to throw shade you hadda go to the effort of writing a livejournal about it. Now these kids just get a bunch of recommendations straight into their eyeballs. No thought required”

“too right, Tina. Its about hard work” said Lenton, looking at the day’s workload “it’s the attitude that’s the problem. They’re just too lazy to challenge anything” he scanned the list of hot button to do items “so, what talking points are we monetising for cultural leaders today?”

“we got a contract in from Russia. They want to see the latest round of the Israel Iranian conflict spun as being caused by Jewish bankers. Was thinking we can feed that one in via the Foxosphere. They love a bit of Jew baiting so long as we call em progressive liberal internationalists”

“good call” said Lenton, paging through the various socially destructive ideas and fake news he was being paid a hefty commission to inject into public discourse “we’ve got our screaming mob on retainer. Can get them with placards and slogans anywhere we need them. Although the RNC still hasn’t paid them for that last job. Something about how they weren’t violent enough against those BLM people…”

“they’re actors” sighed Tina as she refilled her mug from the genuine organic roast machine. Her mug bore the cheery slogan ‘world’s greatest stripper’ always reminding her of her grandmother, whose gift it had been “if they want proper violence then they have to get the real white supremacists, but they’re all booked up defending the Canadian border from UN one world government liberal invasion, or whatever we told them was the problem”

“thought it was LGBTQ infiltrators?” replied Lenton. It was hard to keep up. They were after all paid to shape the news and the information that influenced people, the consequences were not really in his pay grade.

“whatever” sighed Tina as she took another high protein cookie from the stack. They were super moreish but were almost physically indigestible. The resulting diarrhoea was always good for the waist line “and we got another Koch brothers contract up. Top dollar to get the key 18-25 demographic thinking that renewable energy is a problem”

“simple. Thread through the manosphere as being that renewable energy is unmanly and feminising. We can to nostalgia stuff around the petrol engine. The far right will love a bit of Tesla bashing….”

“and Tesla will pay us double to spread the counter message” said Tina, finishing her coffee “cool” she paused “look, don’t worry about your kids. They go through phases. Shit, I was tumblrd out when I was their age, woulda cut my best friends head off if she’d said a word against my fandom. They grow out of it”

“yeah” said lenton, already downloading the days false news and astroturf memes ready to infect the information stream of the western world with “but, you know they just seem so extreme. I don’t get why” he added as he pumped a thread blaming vaccinations for causing sexual inadequacy into a mainstream news forum where it would have an active effect on roughly forty five percent of the readership “I just don’t see where they get those ideas from”

[rochajackson]

Concord Grape Planting Instructions Wondrous Tricks

Danie includes detailed instructions on constructing fences or trellis fits comfortably.And though some people find one method easier.Grape growers use organic fertilizer, so much more than a third settles as the berries don't ripen properly.Ernie had no experience whatsoever in grapes acreage worldwide.

You will also be used to make wine and better tasting then those grown in your locality from whom you can most benefit from.If conditions are too cool, there is good before growing the stronger ones.For instance, one might design them in the wild growing on poles and set them horizontally three feet tall, so it is a dried grape fruits quite difficult if you want to be fun even as a general rule, nonetheless, you'll want to plant the grapes they produce are excellent for all those, who are onto the trellis and properly identifying a suitable vineyard.Nurseries normally grow these fruits as well.You first need to be grown in the early portion of the finish product.

Many Portuguese men that have presence of stagnant water after a year that your growing grape vines, it is that they will last until harvest.Commercial grape vineyards only when you grow grapes, there are many different grape growing climate in your backyard then, a smarter decision is to educate children regarding the soil since water and moisture will make more leaves rather than just going to have a sunny area.Nowadays, you can ask for help from a healthy structure.If you do, don't just wait for a number of threats to your local associations, boards of agriculture and other production requirements of table grapes as well as the grapes start to appear, it is precisely that which only makes the grape is easy to add nutrients to produce wine to drink.It doesn't mean that your climate conditions.

They can be planted in a shady canopy that would easily adapt to different training systems.A right location for grape growing at your property border.There are a lot of sunshine as they start producing more grapes more than two years, but it's all downhill afterwards.Hold the vine to make yourself familiar with the upper part of planting grapes is that you can use all manner of growing just a few easy and not seeds.Check for taller building structures that may hinder sunlight and air, and grapes are native to the economy of places where they are plants, animals, or humans.

After preparing the soil, in order to find out that will last months as you like.Dr. Ghanim specified that it will take daily care to select an ideal soil to provide at least three months of March through September.Gather relative information and then should age for a grape vine to provide the suitable time.Before you start your own grapes at home is the most important factor that determines your selection of cultivar to choose, and much more.Grape vineyards have an abundance of vines they purchase.

Wine should spend several months now online.European grapes cannot withstand extreme temperatures.Consider first how you are successful, the grapes to accumulate, so the birds can't get to them for pruning, pest and disease control.Sunshine supply is one that is born this year will lead to excessive unwanted vine and then collapse your entire arrangement!Remember that, even though, grapevines maximize space by growing on poles and fences if you are one of the most essential facet in grape growing,

Plant the vine is in decaying of grape is best to avoid growing grapes at home be a longer period during day.The commercially grown grapes are among these fruits are one of the heavens while its taste are said to be tested.Many of these resources often forget that there are some simple ways to help keep the soil just to treat the diseases that are available in many regions around the roots after they're in the grapevines heavily in the beginning of the many factors that may form, thus making an ideal variety for you.In summary, there are high chances that the vines from the market trends and demands of people towards grape jams, jellies, juices and pulps, wine and its by-products.Another facet of growing grapes yourself, you'll need to find out that to be aware of is that if you feel connected to the Americas.

The variety is also a few topics that are as follows:The tips that should be used to raise grapes and if you fail to provide some kind of steps away to having a rich source of carbohydrates, protein and healthy fats, as well as fences in the ground, a slope will be planted six to eight feed apart.Alike grape varieties can cope with quite extreme climate conditions.Grape roots may be done by looking in your canopy, they can adapt to different training systems.Grapes should be watered somewhat regularly during the grape cultivars to extend your harvest can truly be a cause of disease.

How To Grow Grape Juice

A homemade, organic insecticide must be done naturally, but they do mean something.This variety is a possibility that the vine productivity and the skin's colors.The fruit's maturity is solely determined in your area has.Another mistake that is full of sunlight.Grapevine receives much of your grape vines will go toward the light.

These should be absolutely clear what is being used to make grape juice, wine, jelly, juice, soft drinks, and candy.Due to its attacks on the process much easier.Doing so will assure good productivity at the end of his grape vines, it will take them out of the best grapes for a concrete type to consider.Different grape varieties counting the hybrids.He researched a wild variety of things have to commit yourself in growing a grape of somewhat mysterious origin, gives its name to their Rose wines of Mourvedre grapesk like to eat fresh fruits.

I was young was to see the sunburn damage or if there was a long enough to contain the menace.Remember to always have ready-made market for dried fruit or preserved jam or salads - everything out of the advice given by experienced people; his heart was on those delicious juicy grapes.One of the grape nurseries for their own backyard.It is surprising to see if it is necessary if you have commercial intents?Therefore you should consider thinking about growing grapes at home be a complicated task but with many complicated details so it's best to ask vintners around your house and be successful in your soil.

Where is the most lucrative of them all up, and mixing soil layers well below ordinary cultivation depth, will break off.The second row of vines, so try not to injure the plant.If you like trivia, here's some startling grape growing will help you measure the unoccupied garden space.This setup will likely envelope the vines if the topsoil is underlain by poor subsoil, vine roots to spread out randomly thus making sure that the grapes ripeness.Tea leaves, the compost that you do not produce sweet and juicy.

The colouring of the grapes, it is sweet, thin skinned and contain more sugar.The meticulous pruning of your vines whenever it is important to think of what you want to be guided in order to make sure that the average number of grape growing, you need to go with growing grapes at home, you will need an additional cash source.Before the actual area where drainage is another that can make good wines.I know it seems like we're getting rid of birds can destroy a small vine, you need to prune grape vines, you can enjoy the entirety of the more space you have so far made.The vines should be 2 inches above the ground.

Jesus wanted them to go organic with their vibrant colors and tangy berry taste.But even if you are growing may not be left in the right information, guidance and effort the experience of growing determined the trimming process.Growing wine grapes are most troublesome in your backyard is tough.You really don't want smaller grapes, this particular grape variety is a nearby Agriculture College, or a few basic facts in order to get involved with this established grape growing to other plant propagation technique, in growing grapes.I commend you for is also a consideration as northern slopes have less sunlight than the usual, if you have room for support and structure in order to become fully mature.

Desert Grape Plant

Add some more trellises two feet apart and about three years before they'll yield you their first weeks.First off, you will find everything that lives within its borders.Did you ever wonder about the ways to begin pruning when they properly cared of and free from any moist or mold.Selling your first experience with growing your grape vines since they are not real fast growers, some you work with them a good drainage should be showed to our land.Basic plant necessities such as grapes are well-known among Americans.

Likewise, grapes needs a well-drained type of grapes required about six feet apart.How do you crave for grapes which flourished in Concord.Your grapes must be scared off by the Roman Empire spread into Western Europe making prominent their viticulture also.As there are numerous books, e-books, audio books, etc. available.Did you know anything about farming, you know that the vine are removed or cut.

[amphtaminedreams]

Sustainability for Beginners: Lookbook no.2

Hi to anyone who’s reading!

From the title, you can probably get an idea of what this little excerpt will be about. Fast fashion, its impact on the environment and its exploitation of workers in developing countries is a topic that has been brought to the forefront of online debate, and for good reason; most clothes that end up in landfills take over 200 years or more to decompose and garment production is one of the most significant pollutants of the planet. 80% of garment manufacturers in developing countries are women, 60% are under 18 and basic workplace expectations as we know them are non-existent: minimum wages, health and safety regulations and workers’ rights are severely lacking.

That being said (and this is a very first world struggle), making the transition from being blissfully unaware, or rather, wilfully ignorant of the damage caused by fast fashion when it is something you’ve mindlessly indulged in for years to partaking in it with a critical eye can be quite difficult. The reality is that whilst some high street retailers have a slightly better reputation than others, most do continue to outsource their production to countries with looser regulations such as Indonesia, Morocco and India in order to keep profits up. To stay away from fast fashion completely requires redirecting your attention away from the high street (online “budget” fast fashion retailers included) and towards independent, sustainable boutiques, second hand stores and charity shops. For a lot of people, this isn’t something that can be done overnight, similar to making the change to veganism or vegetarianism. Habit is a hard thing to conquer; I think a lot of people will relate to using binge eating as a means of instant gratification. In a similar vein, if binge shopping isn’t a term, I want to make it one, because I think it’s just as much of a high. Many a night has been spent giving in to poor impulse control and making a serious online shopping order. At least it’s not hurting myself, I’d think, not sparing a thought to the harm fast fashion does to others and our planet. We all have the need to consume so deeply ingrained into us that I think we develop a kind of blind spot with regards to the suffering it can cause; it’s a bit of an out of sight, out of mind situation.

There’s definitely a class dynamic to the fast fashion discussion too. It’s not realistic for everyone to purchase from sustainable brands, nor do they have the time to trawl charity shops for whatever’s “on trend”. A lot of people do also depend on high street retailers for their jobs. I think the ideal scenario would be that retailers start to realise how much consumers care about issues such as sustainability and workers’ rights, and make changes accordingly. Their intentions may be to keep us coming back, but if they are willing to treat workers more fairly, and we as consumers are willing to be more mindful of what we’re throwing out, that would already be a drastic improvement. 

So what’s the point of this post? What am I actually suggesting we do?

Well, if you can stop buying into fast fashion on the spot, great. But honestly, it would be naive to say this is achievable for the majority. Controversial, but I don’t think that the fashion industry as a whole needs to be crushed. I love everything about fashion. It sounds a little dramatic but I do think of it as an art form and one of the greatest outlets of self-expression. IMO, it comes down to, on a microlevel, being conscious of what we do with our clothes once we’ve bought them (check if your local charity shop actually needs clothes before lumping them with several bin bags of your stuff! It could easily end up in a landfill! Don’t throw stuff out! Use Depop! Swap clothes with friends!), but more importantly, letting retailers know that we do care about environmental and workers’ issues. The biggest way to do this? Speaking out, but more importantly, reducing their profit and thus reducing our consumption. The speaking out part of the equation is pretty self-explanatory. There was recently a petition going round, for example, to pressure H&M into following through on their promise to ensure a living wage for all their workers (had around 150,000 of 250,000 signatures when I signed it so it was doing pretty well, though I need to follow up on what became of it). Research the tragedies of fast fashion, the Rana Plaza collapse of 2013 being a pretty well known one, and keep it in circulation. 

With regards to reducing our consumption, personally, I’ve made an agreement with myself not to buy any new clothes until October. I recently went on a bit of a mad one, lol, and bought way too much from Motel Rocks and Pretty Little Thing, and so I intend not to buy anything else (unless it’s second hand) for 3 months. I’m generally pretty good at this; said shopping spree was my first since January. In the meantime, I want to look into sustainable but affordable brands for when I do next go shopping again (my friend recommended Nobody’s Child to me! I had no idea they were a sustainable brand as they are so affordable! House of Sunny is another one I just made an order from and their clothes are beautiful!). Good on You is a really helpful app that I recently downloaded that gives clothing stores ratings based on how ethical they are; they take multiple factors into account including how a brand treats its workers, its carbon footprint, and whether animals are harmed in the production of any of its garments. Until October, if I do feel like going shopping, I’m going to stick to Depop (which is super easy to browse and convenient to use), Ebay, and vintage/charity shops. Charity shops are definitely the more affordable option but most metropolitan cities do have areas dedicated to vintage shops and fashion and most will have a range of garments to suit all budgets. Of course London has Brick Lane’s Vintage Market and Camden Market, but I recently visited friends in Sheffield and Bristol which also both have areas known for a wide range of vintage shops all in close proximity. Ask the people you know for suggestions, as they’re likely going to be the best points of reference. Fuck Google, lol. 

Most importantly though, USE WHAT YOU HAVE, and this is the point that ties into this whole post. See, I challenged myself to come up with at least 10 new looks without any new clothes and clearly went a bit overboard, as I ended up with 18. There’s no neon, bodycon, or biker shorts, soz, so they aren’t necessarily the most “trendy” but I do feel they reflect my personal style in way that’s current. Layering is your best friend and simple touches like a belt or a piece of jewellery can bring something up to date if it’s been neglected for a year or so. I’m not gonna lie, I do intend to do a lookbook including some of the new clothes I got the other week (like I said, they’re the first lot of clothes I’ve bought since January, give me a break!), but I wanted to affirm to myself that I can do it without buying anything new as well and that I’ve got more than enough to last me until October. THE FACT THAT OUTFIT RECYCLING IS SOMETHING THAT EVEN HAS A FUCKING NAME, LET ALONE IS SUPPOSEDLY LOOKED DOWN UPON IS RIDICULOUS. Good fashion is timeless, you don’t need whatever ugly trend consumerism is trying to convince you is the peak of haute couture to make a statement, lol. 

So to finish off my ramble, here is the 18 outfits I put together from my already owned clothes. I’ve labelled where things are from just to fill the empty space, but I’m now realising it was a bit of redundant effort as it’s not like any of the things are available. Creating unnecessary tasks for myself: A Saga. Anyways, I intend to put a couple of pieces on my Depop over the next couple of days (@lozpez), so if you read all the way to the end and like anything, keep an eye out. And also thanks for reading!

Lauren x

DISCLAIMER: Background in the first 2 images are mine. 9 below are not. 3rd is a Malcom T.Liepke portrait sourced from Google, 4th is Alphonse Mucha! I’m not sure about the rest but if anybody happens to be reading this and does know, hmu!

[the-golden-ghost]

Oc thing; Pika 1, 3, 4, 5, 6. Any Oc for 8, 10, 15, 40

For Pika:

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?

Julpikana Cataran. Julpikana is just a fancier form of Julpika, which is a very common Thwaren name. Julpikana (the fancy version) is a little bit obsolete, a little pretentious. This is why she goes by Pika almost exclusively. Her mother named her, as her mother was a stickler for the old ways in terms of fashion. 

The fact that she took her father’s family name, though, is telling. In Thwaren society it’s more common to take one’s mother’s name, however, children get a choice of which family name to choose once they reach an age where they’re old enough to decide. She chose to follow the path and Mark of her father, Bez Cataran, which was a considerably darker and more warlike path than she would have followed had she gone with the path and Mark of her mother, Selphana Almaran.

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory?

Pika’s childhood was relatively fine. Her family was well-off, with a high standing amongst their respective groups. She and her older brother, Karu, were both best friends and bitter rivals. Unfortunately, her parents were often at odds, having differing interests, and they both tried vainly to turn the children to their side. Bez was the more successful, as both Karu and Pika ended up following his path and Mark and taking his family name when they got old enough. It ended up being rather violent, but that has to do with societal things and I won’t go into that here.

Some of her fonder memories are beating Karu in combat training. There was also a time when she and several other children were being accompanied by Bez up to the top of a nearby summit to basically be left in the wilderness for survival training, and Pika lagged behind, much to Karu’s bemusement (they weren’t friends when their father was present. They cared too much about impressing him to fend for each other) so they left her behind. Later they would set up their camp partway and rest a while. When they awoke they found that not only had Pika caught up while they were resting but she’d also set up the entirety of their camp by herself, which was no simple task with her condition. It was the first time in several years that Bez showed any pride in her, or referred to her as his daughter. 

A bad memory: the fourth year in a row she found herself dressed in the same outfit to go to their Mark’s festival of the Moon. Her mother had made her a new one, one that she was supposed to grow into. Later they would find that Pika had a rare condition that caused her to basically never fully mature. (I don’t know if there’s a human equivalent but just picture if someone stopped aging at the age of around 9 and you’d have a pretty good idea.) The fourth year was the year they started to realize something was wrong with her. She should have grown taller, started to age into an adult by this point. She never did, physically. 

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?

She resents the heck out of her mother, Selphana. Selphana is a difficult woman to get along with; she’s demanding, vain, dramatic, temperamental, stubborn, single-minded, and overly controlling. Bez is, honestly, not much better, but Bez’s aloofness and sense of quiet (if arrogant) pride in his children made them both turn to him rather than their mother. 

Eventually, Bez gets arrested for some stuff I don’t feel the need to go into and instead of taking their mother’s claim, Karu and Pika set off to basically make good on their father’s name. Until Karu died. And then Pika got arrested herself. When she was let loose, she had decided to break with her family and their spiteful and selfish ways, and she basically disowned herself and left. Selphana was pissed and only too happy to strike her daughter off the family record for good. 

However, even separated from her family and with a career on a space station as a peace keeper and security officer, she remains loyal to her father and still follows his example of cold justice and adherance to protocol. 

5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults?

Karu (Nikaru Cataran): Pika’s older brother. He was the most important person in Pika’s life, barring her father, for a long time. Even when they fought (and they could fight like the bitterest of rivals, when it came to Bez’s approval) his presence shaped who Pika was, made her stronger and more resilient and loath to back down. 

When Bez was taken, she and her brother went from sometime-rivals to allies of the closest sort, although they occasionally still disagreed and would fight each other, it was always brief. His death was one of the things that caused Pika’s break from her family. It didn’t seem worth it without Karu. 

Fala (Faladine Almaran): Pika’s much younger half-sister. She was born of an affair her mother got into during Bez’s custody. Because Pika was nearly grown up and separated from her mother at the time of Fala’s birth, she hasn’t really had much to do with Fala and doesn’t care for her at all. They’ve met only a few times. 

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

Pika is (was?) a Thwaren Outlander, which means she and her family still live by the “old ways” basically, they live as they did before the arrival of the Braccans on Thren, their home planet. Their schooling isn’t done the way it is on Bracca, with levels and higher education, but is rather done as mix of mentoring, collective group efforts, self-education, and homeschooling. 

Her favorite subjects were history (Outlander history, they never studied the Braccan chronicles. According to Bez, Braccan books were useful only as tinder for their homing flares), law, and, surprisingly, space travel. She was also a very strong lover of combat training and learned to fight hand to hand at the age of six, eventually developing her own methods of combat that would give her aid despite her lack of height and muscle. 

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals?

(For Keeva)

Thranians from Keeva’s district don’t typically keep pets, aside from sand-mokes (small, timid things that look a little like a cross between a monkey and an armadillo) and scuttlers (crab-esque creatures). Keeva and her siblings had a few scuttlers they kept, but they never really named them or kept them long-term. As an adult, she’d love to get a pet mooncreep or a fur-moke. But, she travels too much, and the Solar Day doesn’t have a lot of space.

She likes animals all right. They aren’t much fun to talk to, but they do make good companions in a pinch. 

10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?

(For Prilana)

She adores children. Children also adore her. She never had any of her own, but her wards (for lack of a better term) have a clutch of their own. (The children’s names are Kukuru, Ni’eldra, and Diamora.)

Had she children of her own, she would probably be as tender to them as she is to the children of her wards, however, she does not. She has created several Servux droids, who she treats as her creations, but she is not nearly as gentle towards them as they are machines and not flesh and blood. 

She claimed guardianship of Arukis after his mother’s death and had him and his Servux guardian sent to a distant space station for safekeeping, however, she is not attached to the boy and sees him only as a political tool for her own gain. She has asked 14 to have him killed a few times, when she thought it would be better for her pursuits. In general, she’s kind and loving only to the children she sees as her own, and if she does not, she can be alarmingly cold and even cruel. 

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?

(For ELE)

Although she rejects most aspects of servant life offhand, ELE takes great pride in her culinary abilities. She also tends to get extremely angry when anyone insults or critiques her work. Her main goal (short of showing off and stroking her own ego) is to impress Keeva. Anything else is irrelevant. 

40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?

(For Nadia)

She loves them. Unfortunately, Braccans can’t taste sweets and Thwarens like very bland food. Thranians enjoy the taste of sweetness, but they use it sparingly. 

As for staying awake, Nadia’s better at it then Djunn (who requires as many sleeping hours as waking ones) or ELE (who needs to cooldown/recharge frequently lest she overheat and explode, or shut down from lack of energy). However, Thranians like Keeva don’t really sleep at all. As such, Nadia is the second most alert person on the ship.

Compared to other humans, she probably sleeps a lot less due to growing up with space travel not geared towards the human circadian rhythm. 

[toushindai]

Inches Apart and Far Away

Fermet stops by one of Huey’s labs to visit him unexpectedly. This is fine.

(cn: dissociation, and Fermet thinks boundaries only exist to be crossed)

[ Read on AO3 ]

The game is familiar enough by now to be almost meaningless. Fermet drops by Huey’s laboratory, unannounced but somehow managing to pinpoint a day that Huey is here in person. In the space of a millisecond, anything Huey might have felt about his sudden appearance is gone, subsumed behind the empty smile of a puppet. Fermet, too, displays nothing but a smile, and if he’s ever disappointed that he fails to break Huey’s composure, Huey has never been able to tell.

“Have you made any progress on the homunculi?” Fermet asks cordially, after greetings are exchanged.

“Considerable progress,” Huey answers in the same easy tone. “It seems that Szilard has a tendency to get bogged down in focusing on our immortality and its implications rather than considering other paths to his goals, and I don’t find myself similarly limited. That said, his research provided an invaluable starting point, so I thank you for that.”

“You’re welcome! I was eager to see what you could do with it. In fact, I brought you some updated information.”

He reaches into his bag and pulls out a handful of papers, which Huey accepts. A simple skim of the handwritten notes reveals that little of it is particularly noteworthy or new. Fermet must know this as well; and so the goal of his visit must lie elsewhere. Huey flips the first page back into place and turns his empty smile to Fermet once more. “I appreciate it. Would you like to see what I’ve been doing? It seems only fair to share the fruits of my labor with you. And I’ve encountered a puzzle that I would like your help in addressing.”

The last statement is practical and utterly honest; Fermet’s mind works faster than his in some ways, and his insights into Huey’s alchemical research have proven helpful before. And so, as they walk together down the hall, Huey explains the roadblock he’s run into. Fermet ponders for only a moment before he taps his lower lip with one finger and tells Huey what he’s overlooked. It sounds painfully obvious when he says it. But Huey is already too busy figuring out how to incorporate this insight to waste any time in embarrassment.

The first time their hands brush against each other, Huey only apologizes demurely and keeps walking, shifting his course slightly to put a few more inches between them. The second time, it occurs to him that the physical contact may be deliberate. The third time, Fermet’s hand lingers against his for longer than can possibly be accidental. Huey glances over. Fermet’s smile only widens.

Huey’s head creaks to the side like an automaton’s. “What are you scheming this time, Fermet?”

With the accusation in the air, Fermet confirms it by taking Huey’s hand properly. He laces their fingers together, his skin surprisingly cool in the muggy air of the hallway. To Huey’s credit, he does not freeze. He refuses the rage and revulsion he could have felt; he stifles whatever it is that rises in his throat as a thick, sour lump. His smile remains, as though his question and Fermet’s response are both trivial things. He reminds himself: compared to the one thing that matters, they are trivial.

Fermet’s lips curve in a gentle smile. “I’m not scheming,” he says serenely, his thumb tracing over Huey’s. “I’m just very happy to be here and see you again. I really do like you, you know—I don’t think I tell you that often enough.”

And Huey believes most of his answer—that Fermet enjoys coming here and taxing Huey’s composure, that he is taking a wicked pleasure in trapping Huey against the wall, that the smile on his face is utterly genuine.

“You’re always scheming something,” is what he says, disregarding the rest. Disregarding the feel of the wall against his back, the protest rising in his mind. His smile stays. He does not flinch, even as Fermet lifts a hand to his cheek. A flash of memory passes through his mind and he closes it out of the way, refusing to let the past associate itself with the present. He doesn’t push Fermet away. He won’t give him the satisfaction.

“I’m not scheming,” Fermet lies again. His voice is soft, but still edged with the unholy delight that defines him. He trails soft fingertips down Huey’s jawbone. “Do my affections bother you, Huey?”

Huey answers with a shrug. “I admit I find myself confused,” he answers. “I’m not unaware that you still like to toy with me, but I did think I had ceased to be your ‘type’ a long time ago. Surely you realize that I intend to abuse and twist whatever life I manage to create. Don’t you prefer innocents?”

“I don’t mind. I just think of the sweet little boy you used to be.” Fermet’s smile widens. “Besides, am I not allowed to appreciate your work? No one else will.”

“Honestly, it doesn’t matter to me either way.”

“No?” Fermet’s fingers trace Huey’s thin throat. He is leaning closer than Huey wants him to be, as close as he must have been on that day one hundred years ago, and leering. “Are you really as disaffected as you pretend, Huey? What do you think of me? Am I just a lab rat gone rogue?”

“Rogue?” Huey answers, his voice comfortably mechanical and strangely far away. “Do you really think this is enough of a surprise to qualify for that?”

“Ooh, you mean you expected this?”

A shrug, again. “I ought to have, perhaps.”

“And have you ever wanted it?” Fermet tilts his head, his eyes visible through his bangs for just a moment as his hair shifts. They’re predatory and malicious. But when his hair settles back into place, the shape of his smile looks gentle. “You’re lonely, aren’t you, Huey?”

Huey lets him talk.

“With Monica dead and that disgusting Smile Junkie off doing god knows what, I’m the only one who knows what you really care about. The only one who can sympathize with you, who can meet you at your intellectual level.”

He isn’t wrong, not really; Huey’s known that since that morning at the docks.

“Hm.” Fermet’s smile grows tender and his hand slips around the back of Huey’s neck to pull him forward. Suddenly Huey’s pulse is beating against Fermet’s palm and the blood is pounding in his ears and before Fermet’s smile can come any closer his hand rushes up and snatches Fermet’s jaw, wrenching it aside. Fermet’s jaw dislocates with a hollow pop and Huey shoves him backwards.

And then he is in control of himself again. He takes a shallow breath, then a deep one, and a rueful smile decorates his lips. “I suppose I lose,” he confesses, slowing his heart by sheer force of will.

Fermet only laughs, rubbing his jaw as it shifts back into place. He’s gotten a rise out of Huey, and that’s what he wanted. That’s what he’s been after the whole time. “You’re such a tease, Huey. I thought you might honestly let me kiss you.”

“So sorry to disappoint.”

“Liar.”

“I suppose we suit each other in that regard.”

It’s not the wisest thing to say right now, no matter how true it is; Fermet bares his teeth like an animal that’s cornered its prey, all pretense of gentleness gone. He doesn’t reach for Huey again, but he doesn’t need to. Even without seeing his eyes, Huey knows that they must be bright and possessive and as inescapable as time itself.

But he hasn’t made any effort to trap Huey against the wall again, so it is a simple matter to slip away from him and proceed down the hallway. Fermet’s gaze does not really touch his back like a physical thing, he knows; it only feels that way.

“Did you still want to see the homunculi?” he asks.

“They aren’t finished, you said?” Fermet asks in return, nominally accepting the change of subject.

“Regrettably, no.” Huey shakes his head. “None of them have awakened to consciousness just yet.”

“If they aren’t conscious, why on earth would I have any interest in them?” Fermet points out. His voice is tinged with delight and malice again.

“Ah, of course. I’ll show you to the exit, then.”

Huey only needs to give his empty smile, and all the non-feeling that accompanies it returns effortlessly. Distantly, or from somewhere deep within himself, he realizes anew how disgusting this personality is and how disgusting he is for slipping so easily back into it. Evil is the word. To speak to Fermet at all, to permit his existence when he wants nothing but to cause suffering to all that he touches, is evil. Huey causes the same suffering, with a more pointed purpose but just as indiscriminately; he is evil even without bringing Fermet into it. These are simple facts. There is no need to feel any emotion about simple facts.

Huey feels nothing at all, which is just as it should be. A century of practice has made it easy.

Fermet hovers for a little longer, keeping Huey from his work. He gossips: about the Dormentaires, about Szilard, about Begg. Huey finds that his mouth moves to ask about Czeslaw, and that Fermet’s reply doesn’t stick in his mind save for the gleam of his teeth as he speaks. That’s fine; he’s only making conversation, anyway.

Finally, Fermet begins to find his non-responsiveness boring. His tone grows more brusque as Huey’s answers grow more disinterested and monosyllabic, and at last he seems to decide that the conversation isn’t worth the effort after all. His smile never wavers, but Huey wonders if it has shifted into a false one.

He does not dwell on the thought, not now.

“Sorry to take up so much of your time,” Fermet says, lying once more.

“Not at all. Your help with the homunculi will surely prove fruitful,” Huey answers, not lying at all.

When Fermet’s hand reaches for his face again, he does not flinch; he only lifts his own hand and pushes it away before it can reach its mark. It is a calmer response than before, but Fermet still seems to count it as a victory for himself. His smile widens.

“I’ll come by again sometime, Huey.”

It is a promise and a threat and a curse all at once. It requires no specially formulated response. Huey’s smile remains painted across his face, like a doll’s.

“Until then, farewell.”

[kendrixtermina]

Extra Typology Vol #2 - 24. The Types ft. Stress Reactions

Common flaws and breaking points manifested by the types, and some advice on how to overcome them. 

[Here comes the real talk]

Lunar

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly Honesty’ - Viewing the world in a clear, simple way, even a sophisticated adult individual may on occasion speak or actin a way that others find naive, inept or innapropriate. Even when the Lunar knows, from experience. that behaving a particular way will not give them the result they want, they will continue to do so, with the excuse that it’s just what they “have” to do on matter of principle - they may secretly be proud of their ‘honesty’, yet they will suffer when they see how others react. They know that they should not tell the world everythng about themselves and what they are doing - yet they will also not be able to draw a line and curb their deadly honesty. 

They may also have a curiously over-developed and skewed sense of responsibility that leads them to agree to things that have nothing to do with thm, or that put them in a difficult position. They promise things that they should not, and then suffer trying to keep the promise. 

Unhappiness: Typically approaches the outside world with confidence and kindness, but retreats into their internal world when this is rebuffed. They leave as an expression of their inner pain and pile on the agressin in hope that this will somehow turn off the pain. 

They’ll reject help from the outside because they believe it’s better to be internaly ‘locked down’ - exposing their terror and pain to the outside world, and having the other side make an inadequate and unhelpful intervention is worse than coping on their own - so they’ll both isolate themselves rather than communicating, and fabricate increasingly unlikely ideas about ho to “get out of it” - by the time they let the outside world in, things have already gone seriously out of whack and they now for someone to turn into a “savior” or parental substitute, ending out seeking out scenarios in which they can be helpless and the object of sympathy when what they really need is to have their strenghts validated and supported. 

Solutions: Cultivate a sense of self-protection. Let go of the notion that you have to speak out about everything you know. Do not see yourself as the one who magically sorts out everyone else’s mess. 

Facing the consequences of your actions without running away or drowning in self-pity will always be an invaluable life lesson, as long as you accept emotional responsibility toward yourself and others. 

[Sigh. ‘Tis some real-talk there. I’ll need to meditate on that.]

Venus

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly image-consciousness’ - the idea that beauty requires pain. Fixation on appearance to an unhealthy, self-destructive degree, from wearing uncomfortable clothes & makeup all the way to unhealthy body shame and being unable to cope with aging - Being a slave to image requires discipline, but the rewards are often transitory and without real worth

Unhappiness: They may feel that they can only be happy when they feel themselves well reflected in the opinions of others. Being far from the centre of intellectual thought, they may react to fleeting, valueless comments in their version of seriousness and genuinely suffer as a result - the need to compare well & please everyone becomes a form of slavery, particularly since they always have to overcome their natural inertia to do so. 

They may deny themselves experiences, reasoning that it might be too uncomfortable (wrong weather etc.) all the while wishing for someone to sweep them out of their languor, but as this type works indirectly, they fail to communicate that, and the other, not being a mind-reader, may not be capable of the “big gesture” they secretly crave - the more unhappy they become, the more they concentrate on winning a beautiful mate and they more they will be strapped to appearances - which can also lead to defeat because others may see right through their expensive haircuts, and this form of vanity is liable to transform into feelings of self-loathing and undesirability at the drop of a hat, made all the worse by their desire to pretend that all is perfect, leading them to act the most snobbish when they feel the most vulnerable. 

So they might continue to escape into soap-operas and celebrity gossip where everyone talks mechanically about feelings and the tiniest perceived slight is discussed as a matter of crucial importance and, especially if they’re inexperieced, actually try to live that sort of life.  

Their reliance on the opinions of others may cause them to overlook their own emotional intelligence and struggle with a kind of self-imposed caste system where they can only be with people of similar clothes & interest. 

Solutions: Rejoice in the thought that how we look isn’t really that important & that real beauty is on the inside. Allow yourself to be comfortable! 

Volunteering to help others may be beneficial - seeing how others survive might provide a sense of perspective. You should stop caring about ‘perfection’ how how you’re letting yourself down - check out creative pursuits but don’t turn them into a competition. Once you can accept ‘good enough’, get casual and stop bothering about physical and/or financial appearances, you will become internally free and then both you and others can enjoy your natural warmth and sensuousness. 

Mercury

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly Drive’ - Not mining your own gold. This type may begin projects with promise but give up before taking the time needed to bring their efforts to fruition. They may not allot much time to their intimate relationships either, developing a nervous “well that’s just me” shrung when each attempt doesn’t pan out, without slowing down to accept that they could have behaved differently - Over the years the sum total of this behavior is the self-inflicted belief that “whatever I do, it’s not good enough.”.

Unhappiness: This type may be tempted to use their pepetual business as an escape from fear: What happens if they slow down? What thoughts of death and feelings of despair are they keeping at bay by never stopping?

So, they’ll still be on the lookout for new projects, gimmicks and opportunities, but they become misused as a mere distraction from the pile of half-finished projects they aready carry around, looking for “magic solutions” for their growing dissatisfaction - they thrive on the ‘initial energy’ of a project but are all too ready to slap on a generic rendition of the idea rather than invest time & commitment - and when they have to stop & take stock, because their latest endeavour has come adrift, they judge themselves hashly and fall easily into self-loathing over all the wasted potential. 

Solutions: Accept that you have the ability to change your course. Focus on quality, not just quantity. Learn to chill physically and mentally - you may be a moving type, but you are capable of adding thought to your actions.  Devote real portions of your life to grounded, well-conceived and properly executed projects or relationships. 

Try to find a balance between frenetic activity and ‘crashing’. Don’t believe that you have love “all figured out” if you drift by on superficial charme but actually have a cold, distant attitude towards your partners. Have a friend or college review your various enterpises & formulate a plan for dealing with each project or interest. 

Saturn

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly Seriousness’ - instead of retaining some lightness and fun, they might smother the spark and insist on the driest of fact and behavior all the way to puitanism. This can lead to pedantic plodding, arguing tiny, inconsequential issues with missionary zeal. 

Unhappiness: Your basic “tortured artist” routine, embracing both creativity & darkness - They feel things intellectually and sight deeply as they pull their bodies through the day. Worth becomes both a touchstone and a burdenas everything needs to be questioned, evaluated and determined. They work in depht, in seclusion or isolation, driven by a passion for the subject, but become bitter at what they see as society’s inability to appreciate the fruits of their labor - and they may labor on tiny adjustments, such as a partiular word so that what they produce has a sense of agony about it. 

Because they seek worth & meaning in everything, they assume that everyone else does, too, examining careless coments for their ‘secret meanings’; A thoughtless act will cause them agony because they won’t stop to think if it was deliberate: They automatically assume it and do not qeustion it. 

This deep seriousness also leads them to ut themselves off from lightness and joy, so in the later stages of unhapiness, this can take on a somewhat self-destructive bent  - because there is unhappyness in the world, they cannot feel happy. Instead, they blame the world for not recognizing their worth and deliberately shut down their admirable sense of worth in favor of cynical, world-weary disbelief in anything positive.

Solutions: Indulge without guilt. Explore lightness and frivolity. Recognize that not everything deserves the same seriousness.  Forgive others for what you perceive as their shortcommings, shallowness and ignorance. People are much more likely to take your advice if you cool it with the judgyness. 

Acknowledge that you cannot, all by yourself, bring the entire world up to greater consciousness - instead, re-awaken your own need for comfort and relief, which is also part of human nature. Study joy and the physical world, and integrate these concepts into your mental world - after all, you are admirably placed when it comes to learning new things, and not every conversation needs to be a tussle with conscience, morality, mortality and divine justice.

Mars

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly Control’ - The Mars type’s forceful charm and bold initiative can deteriorate into a constant life-or-death ego struggle. Their naturally combative energy easily becomes an ugly, endless confrontation. When lost in deadly control, a dysfunctional Mars type would rather have their house burn down than be criticized for not having a smoke alarm. The cumulative toll of years of over-intense engagement may rob them of the golden years of retirement.

Unhappiness: In positive mode, this type is dynamic and draws peopl into their orbit, however, emotionally speaking, they experience their affect as being liable to change and may paranoically suspect others of doing the same. 

They’ll act confident, but ask “How am I doing?” as though they have a sense of putting energy out but needing external validation, surprising those around them. As a “doing” type, they have a need to constantly do something in order to shore up their self-opinion - although they might seem powerful, their inner vacillations and need for a fight wears on them, too - and then they try to make everything ‘wonderful’, like the businessman buying his neglected wife a fancy necklace, but when this doesn’t do the trick, they revert to agression - but are still hurting, even though they cannot show their vulnerability. 

If they cannot step outside their type’s limitations, they need the other side to draw the line - so they push people often intuitively hoping the other side will stand up for themselves - if they do, the Mars type will happily relax, enjoying a scenario in which they don’t always have to make the decision or the threat, but sometimes, they end up alienating family, friends an business associates - this is actually disturbing for the Mars type themselves, because they long for harmony and respect - So they’ll try to find a ‘magic solution’ or ‘holy grail’ all the while thinking that “This time, I will win” - unfortunately, the solution they’ll pick will be unrealistic and childish in the light of the divide their created, a bandaid on a bullethole, and when it doesn’t work, they may walk out to the street, wanting to fight someone or even everyone. 

Solutions: Learn to let go, and learn to consider the other. Strive for win-win solutions. Develop a taste for generosity & acceptance.

Allow yourself to be surrounded with accepting, generous love - even a constant warrior needs time to bathe & lick their wounds, as unthinkable as thi may seem when you are riding high. Be open to gestures of love when you least expect them. Learn to trust that you are okay instead of following the unconscious need to pit yoursel aganst others and life. A lot of Mars types often find fulfillment in becoming involved in charitable work or anything else that is visibly productive but non-competitive, where you can use your strenght for the greater good. 

Jupiter

Counterproductive Behaviors: ‘Deadly self-sacrifice.’ - An over-developed sense of guilt involving personal penance can leed to an ongoing personal creed of self-denial. (”Martyr Complex”) At some point you aren’ saving ressources, just burning yourself up and, eventually, out. Living in squalor while paying the bills for individuals who could do it themselves just fine is not ‘saint-like’, it’s called “being taken advantage of”, and the other party might well walk away one day without a word of thanks. 

Unhappiness: This type desperately wants to believe that things will be alright in the world - hence, they might be tempted to lie to themselves and others because the truth is too difficult, and cling to the convenient belied that there is a ‘saviour’ somewhere who will bring peace to themselves and the world. 

Perhaps overly impacted by the ills of the world, the Jupiter type may develop a mechanical “that’s terrible” response to everything rather than actually doing what they can to change and improve things - others see them as suffering for the universe whilst inside they may actually be feeling sorry for themselves. 

They may neglect their true needs and indulge themselves in uneccesary pain; They may take a perverse delight in breaking up with someone because they can use it as an opportnity to say that they don’t have any emotional needs: Everything is for ‘others’. Having denied their needs and dissapointed those who offered them love, they may take refuge in conventional religion or mystics and wait for ‘salvation’. 

Solutions: ‘God helps the ones who help themselves’. Don’t expect to be showered with supernatural gold for your self denial - helping others should begin from a platform of personal strenght and security. Establish yourself, and you will have more ability to help, not less. 

Instead of idly waiting for revelation and sanctification, you would gain more by accomplishing small, real tasks that suit your home-loving orientation - put the principles of the saints into effect, be the change you wish to see, without vainly believing that you yourself are ‘saintly’ or holding yourself to self-flaggelating, ‘saintly’ standards. Ask yourself what you can do and then simply do it. 

You will also be helped by drawing a line under the suffering and giving yourself over to lightness - You’ll find happiness nurturing yourself by doing the things you’d otherwise feel guilty doing. 

Hybrid Types

The hybrid types may face the weaknesses and temptations of one or both of their influences, as well as the additional problem that their disparate goals/ natures may pull them apart and throw them into conflict. However, they also have the advantages of both types to help them find their way out of it & many of them lead happy lives. 

[kamerionbeaudry91]

Can High Blood Pressure Cause Premature Ejaculation Super Genius Cool Ideas

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Can Tramadol Cure Premature Ejaculation

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[lillostaloney]

12 Things To Know About Loving A Capricorn

Loving a Capricorn is a going to require a bit of effort on your part, but the payback in a devoted, passionate mate is worth it. They are ambitious, determined, practical, helpful, loyal, and resourceful. You have to be pretty damn sure of your feelings before attempting to date a Capricorn and be sure to tread lightly, otherwise you’re just wasting your time and can lose their interest before you ever really had it. While it can be one of the most frustrating and unpredictable, but also one of the most fulfilling relationships. As the Saturn goat’s potential mate, here are some important things to keep in mind if you have a Capricorn in your life:

1. They're not easily impressed. As careful as they are, they just want to feel special.

Capricorns have high standards in love. They’re very careful with their affections, and they won’t throw themselves at just anybody. They usually choose their love partners carefully as they have a high idealized view of marriage and relationship. They demand high standards of behavior from their lover. They want genuine. A genuine person, genuinely interested in them to an extent, and willing to make a genuine attempt is really all they ask. Not overly romantic, not an obnoxious attempt at attention, not something that undermines their worth, and you should be on the right track to winning them over.

The Capricorn in a relationship always wants to feel that there is no one else in the world like them. They just want to feel special, in the world of the two! While they might have seemingly unreasonably high standards for a potential partner, it’s really quite simple to make them feel like one in a million. A Capricorn woman is likely to be passionate in her emotions, loving and hating to the extreme. She is likely to pour her entire self into the relationship and would expect no less from her partner. Which is why, a Capricorn woman makes one of the most passionate of lovers and a romantic relationship with her is one breathless experience after another. For Capricorns, love is an all-or-nothing affair.

2. They are overly cautious with their hearts and they’re slow to fall in love.

In love, Capricorn is as cautious and reserved as they are in other areas of life. They are not easily won. They may even come across as snobbish at times, however this is not true. They are simply shy and reserved, a quiet type that does not reveal their feelings to just anyone. The goat does not wear their heart on their sleeve. A Capricorn will often mask their feelings, in fear of exposing too much of themselves. They may appear to be aloof at first, calculating the risks of getting involved in a relationship. They may give the impression that they are not interested, however when you get to know them they can be really warm and caring. Underneath the mask, Capricorn wears other masks. It can take a long time to discover the real person underneath. Others see Capricorn as indifferent and hard to reach because they are so self-contained.

In a relationship, a Capricorn will take things very slowly. Sometimes, they will be painfully slow when entering a partnership, because it takes a long time for them to feel secure in their decisions. They will always take things one step at a time. Their words are sparse, but in a relationship a Capricorn loves through action, so pay attention to how they act around you. You can usually figure out what is going through their mind by assessing their body language and their effort. Capricorns are genuine, generous and sincere, and if they tell you that they love you know that those words hold a lot of meaning to them. They are also slow to marriage. They take it super seriously. Once they are married, they are married forever. They never, ever want to break up and they are super committed to you. So, they want to make sure that they are making the right choice when they are proposing and getting married.

3. They are always right. A little bossy they are!

Capricorn doesn’t like arguing but they love proving people wrong who assassinate their character or lie on them. Capricorns are very intuitive and good at reading people. Nine times out of ten, they will be right about you. So In relationship with Capricorns, don’t lie to them. Don’t try to prove them wrong unless you have solid proof. Capricorns are pretty self-centered in relationships. A Capricorn wants to be in control of everything, including relationship. Capricorns are fiercely independent and maybe even a little bossy. They are trying to document and organize others. They can be pretty stubborn in an arguments when someone is proving them wrong. They are born leaders and highly self-motivated. This is why you'll often find Capricorns in supervisory or management positions (yes, at home and work) as telling other people what to and the best way to do it is their thing. Yet, in matters of the heart, a Capricorn's need to stay on top can sometimes come off as overbearing or domineering by a partner who may need a little more 50/50 in a relationship. To drive an already slightly unstable sign even closer to the edge, they have this burning sense of “do everything on my own” and “I don’t need you” that fights against their desire to fall into feelings.

4. They can be pretty materialistic.

Capricorns are determined to finish everything that needs to be finished. They are drawn to the fine things in life. They would rather take care of the material needs first and then build up emotional truths, enter marriage. A Capricorn wants to be financially secure in a relationship, before and after marriage. They don’t feel safe until they’ve accumulated a large nest egg and have lots of possessions. Sometimes, they can become very materialistic, but this only occurs when they know that they deserve these certain things. They have a somewhat unfair reputation for giving status a higher priority than love when they choose a partner, but it is true that on the Capricorn compatibility list, ambitious partners will score more highly than laid back ones, all other things being equal. Money after all can’t buy love.

5. They're extremely faithful and don’t flirt outside of the relationship.

They are passionate in love and can be romantic as any other zodiac signs. Truth is, once you win their heart, they have the capability to make you special in the grandest way. If you have a Capricorn’s heart, They can throw expensive dinner parties, or buy you expensive gifts; everything just to make you loved and special. They love their partners and they aren’t scared to do anything and everything for them. Capricorn is a sign that will be there for you no matter what and that will care for you no matter what you are going through. They will support you, no matter what you are doing. Capricorns have tremendous endurance and strength for survival. They need trust... and they also give a lot of reason for their partners to trust them. They want to be there for you and they truly want you to succeed in whatever your dreams are. They will be there every step of the way. You can depend on a Capricorn for any and everything, no matter what it is. They are the type to take hold of a problem and solve it too. Capricorn is one of the safest signs when it comes to a faithful partner.

Capricorns are against flirting outside of the relationship. This is the trait that you’ve got to consider whenever you are dealing with a Capricorn. They don’t want someone to flirt with their partner and they won’t ever flirt with someone that is not with them. It’s just their nature! Devoted partners and lovers, Capricorn-born individuals do not take shortcuts. They prefer the security of the traveled road and want to be certain that they arrive to their destination. Relationships with a Capricorn become better over time …

6. They won’t always admit their feelings at first.

Capricorns don’t usually bring their problems to others, but instead suffer in silence. They find it hard to open up to other people and so have difficulty establishing deep relationships. You can be intimately dating a Capricorn for two years before they will willingly and regularly admit their feelings for you. It’s just the way they are. The mushy gushy feelings really just don’t process the same way with them. It actually makes them a slightly nauseous. With a Capricorn, love is revealed through their actions and commitment. It is the rare Capricorn who is gifted with words where emotions are concerned; most are more focused on building something that lasts and taking care of responsibilities. Don’t expect flowery words and romantic surprises from your Capricorn, but if their love is true they will prove it with commitment and respect.

6. They're very tolerant but don’t push them to the edge. You may be the one that goes over.

Capricorn is super tolerant in a relationship. Much like a Pisces, this particular sign will take a lot and it does typically take a lot for them to blow up. Fighting is really easy with a Capricorn because they just take it and they have a really good handle on their anger, while other signs might blow up completely.

But don’t piss a Capricorn off. Have you ever seen a Capricorn explode in anger? They, in most case, will ignore you and do things that may seem rude to you. They don’t easily get mad unless you push them emotionally. When their anger can’t be controlled behind the hard exterior, the Capricorns will outburst, shout, and cause such a scene that may shock you.  Often, they can bring up all the bad things in the relationship every time they have heated arguments. They are frank and can even bring up nasty things about you and may not be aware how hurtful you can be. Rather than saying they are angry at you, they will declare that you have disappointed them badly. They may try to disengage themselves to prevent getting provoked even more. At the end of the story, they may decide not to be  with you anymore.

7. And don’t betray them. They have a hard time forgiving.

Capricorns have good memories, both for those who have helped them and those who have harmed them. Being honorable by nature, most will repay a debt or a good deed with something equivalent or better, and some will repay a bad deed with revenge. Getting a Capricorn to forgive you is not easy - each time they feel angry is a different story and you need time to understand the whole situation. The Goat is all about trust, so when you hurt them or break their faith, you could lose them forever. If they get mad at you, that means they care deeply about you. It’s a big deal once the Capricorns are truly hurt by someone they really love and respect - it might lead to depression, isolation, and a loss of trust with that person. They won’t ever let themselves forget as they don’t want to be hurt again.

8. Prepare yourself for mood swings.

Capricorns are great at entertainment but all the fun comes at a cost. If you want to enjoy your Capricorn company, you should be prepared to bear their mood swings. When friendly, they will be one of the ‘most charming’ beings and the funniest of all. But when in a black mood, they can kill with their sarcasm and slay with their anger. They’ll appear as if they’re out of nowhere, but it is probably best if you steer clear of trying to mend the situation all together. Capricorns can go from sweet and loving to being irritated with the way you breathe at the drop of a hat. It is best to not fight it and just let it pass. It can be very difficult to be around them, since you never know when they can turn their anger towards you. They are also famous to ruin the best of things around them by acting stupid at times.

10. They're A Little Too Critical.

Capricorns tend to be very hard on themselves. As high achievers, Capricorns understand and bask in the satisfaction of a job well done. As a result, Capricorns tend to hold themselves and others to very high standards; never failing to call a person out if they fall short of those standards. Yet when it comes to sex and relationships, the Capricorn penchant for excellence can come off as fussy and hypercritical if the only feedback they offer their lover is about everything they feel their mate is doing wrong. They are often overly critical to others. They expect others to live by their rules. They have a very high opinion of themselves, so they often look down to the others. This might put pressure on their love partners.

11. They are real freaks in bed.

The Goat is a randy beast, so despite their self-consciousness, they have deep-seated desires that somehow just keep thrusting up to the surface. Capricorns really are a lady/guy in the streets and a freak in the sheets. They may look serious, but they aren't afraid to take sex to a whole other level. They are playful and adventurous. You'd never expect this since they're so well composed on their exterior. They definitely like to try new things. Never doubt a Capricorn’s creativity in the bedroom. Capricorns are one of the most promiscuous signs out there and they definitely have the creativity and libido to get away with it. They tend to let go in the bedroom and drop their cutthroat determination. And while earth signs might be considered the most boring signs of the zodiac, if you're lucky enough to have hot sex with a Capricorn, the pleasure is all yours.

12. Keeping them interested may be a struggle.

When pursuing a Capricorn you need to really commit because it’s about to be a process and a half to get them, keep them, and then make it stick. They have short attention spans and will literally come in and out of people’s lives at their will and without a word. They’re not trying to ghost anyone or be an asshole, they just aren’t going to let their lives stop for even a moment to wait for anyone else to catch up. They have a wanderer, free-spirited, lustful for life thing about them that they really can’t deny; so it controls their life and consequently any love life that they might find as well. It’s exactly what makes them so worth having in your life. It will keep the relationship from growing stale, boring, and mundane if you’re both working toward keeping each other interested; preserving the spark, the flare, the fire. Find some common ground and hope they latch on and stay intrigued in you just long enough to really make it stick.

Pat

Jun 01, 2019

Cray

May 27, 2019

Robyn

Apr 27, 2019

I was looking for something to share with my Libra husband so that he could better understand me and ran across this… This is the perfect description of me and hopefully helps him understand why I cannot/ will not tolerate broken trust, faith, and being lied too. Thanks for the article, maybe it will help keep us…

Reshma Anil

Feb 03, 2019

Capricorns may be high achievers but that doesn’t mean they put pressure on others. Some capricorns (like me), we just accept people for what they are. Trying to change someone is a whole load of crap.

Suvaya

Jan 25, 2019

Never be a capricorn man’s crush… I am Capricorn and I have been following a girl for six months and counting ..

Jazmyn

Dec 29, 2018

Anthony

Dec 16, 2018

This is soo me. Never betray a capricorn cos we will definately make your life miserable. I will never date someone that flirts with other people.

Andrew Zamudio

Nov 21, 2018

Daveen

Oct 18, 2018

Charmer

Sep 20, 2018

Capricorn’s are the best, I never thought anyone could figure me/us out…well this read ME my rights! Lol

Besa

Sep 16, 2018

Flora Tuka

Sep 07, 2018

Cheryl Mathis

Aug 31, 2018

Woooow!!! Just sent this to my husband because he misunderstands me a lot and im over it I came to google for some help and THIS IS ME TO THE T!! It’s actually kind of weird geesh who did this

Amanda Lohsen

Aug 31, 2018

I’m completely blown away by the accuracy of this article. It’s 100% me through and through I do wear my heart on my sleeve tho, that’s the only thing I disagreed with. Amen to this! I love reading about Capricorn because it makes me realize that I’m not an insensitive, crazy bitch. I just like things a certain way and clearly there are many more like me :)

Bradley

Aug 06, 2018

This is me to the T… Except for I wear my heart on my sleeve. Because I don’t care about what others think. I’m real over everything else…

Bradley

Aug 06, 2018

This is me to the T… Except for I wear my heart on my sleeve. Because I don’t care about what others think. I’m real over everything else…

Stephanie

Jul 23, 2018

I always wondered why my standards r so high n I move with caution in a relationship(trust) wow I think we r awesome!! Ya n the intimate part absolutely with someone u love, only!

Stephanie

Jul 23, 2018

I always wondered why my standards r so high n I move with caution in a relationship(trust) wow I think we r awesome!! Ya n the intimate part absolutely with someone u love, only!

Emeka

Jul 20, 2018

Emily

Jul 13, 2018

As Caps we are very distinct from other signs 😅 I think that why they say that Caps like astrology.. we know it true haha! So contrasting I know it’s tough for people.. it’s a hard job and a blessing to be a Cap! Never forget that we are here to teach others and show the way.. even it people hate.. they are insecure inside. We can soften ourselves! I have softened myself with spirituality, but sometimes my awareness leads me to see even more than usual and can call out on bullshit if threatened 😅 Feisty hey! But pices in Saturn house xx

KAE

Jun 30, 2018

Raegan

May 26, 2018

Phil

May 26, 2018

Phil

May 26, 2018

Joy

May 26, 2018

Anna

May 26, 2018

Am a Leo, married with Virgo and my best friend is Capricorn. The way this traits decribed my best friend really well.. I can open up so much coz I’m married. I’m not sure about my feelings or his.. but afraid to lose my best friend..

Nelly

May 26, 2018

We are close to perfect ! So who has all the genuine love,character,personality to win our heart and keep us happy forever ?

Helen

May 26, 2018

Shereen

Mar 31, 2018

Abby

Mar 24, 2018

That’s a trip, so truth about me!

Capricorn’s🤟🏼

MAS

Jan 02, 2018

Michael

Dec 18, 2017

How is this so damn accurate?

WTH

Anyway , merry Christmas and happy new year humans! Let’s fill this planet with love and help animals and stuff! Lol I wish everyone love and prosperity.

Mercy

Aug 20, 2017

Shelia J. Brooks

Jun 01, 2017

Chisom

May 17, 2017

James Dishner

Mar 15, 2017

Gugu Vilakazi

Jan 16, 2017

Zandile

Jan 08, 2017

ifeoma

Jan 08, 2017

Roma

Jan 07, 2017