#cats the musical mass attack

[margo-mania]

CATS OCS MASS ATTACK!!

featuring:

razzle (mine) @cillyscribbles's https://artfight.net/character/4944046.mme-moeureilles @mysticalcats's https://artfight.net/character/4081941.foxglove and https://artfight.net/character/4252973.ellipses HattyBee's https://artfight.net/character/3429584.teacup (i couldnt find a tumblr) @pinkieclown's https://artfight.net/character/4401646.oopsadaizee @kokolencha's https://artfight.net/character/3090576.koi Autismbeast's https://artfight.net/character/5198520.lady-jesterjumble (i dont feel comfortable typing out ur tumblr sorry </3) @swamp-d0g's https://artfight.net/character/2898014.amarillo @ufofrommarss's https://artfight.net/character/4134637.fisher @murdleandmarot's https://artfight.net/character/4420348.bluebelle APearOfJoy's https://artfight.net/character/4123652.curianne (I KNOW YOU HAVE I TUMBLR I JUST CANT REMEMBER SORRY) Cuquiidheart's https://artfight.net/character/4448114.kinommamee @rimtimtigger's https://artfight.net/character/4621639.troy @op3ra's https://artfight.net/character/2239227.runette-redcat @commander-spaceboy's https://artfight.net/character/2556206.tinentack and finally @misconceivedcapricorn's https://artfight.net/character/5087592.jabberwocky

[every-eye-evermore]

I need new therapy lenses but they still haven’t come in :’) can’t do artfight n shit

[straightforthefl00r]

sidekick? more like sidechick!!

There were three main outcomes Tomura had prepared for, when he schemed to attack USJ.

One: the ideal result was that he would succeed in killing All Might with his state-of-the-art nomu, and move onto the next stage of his plan to world annihilation. The world would hail chaos in one move. He would be known to everyone that he was the bringer of fear; the one who destroyed their precious peace.

Or two: All Might would, annoyingly, not die, but would be fatally injured by the nomu. This would still be partial success, as the Symbol of Peace would be out of commission, and this would mean that society would be well on its way to falling without its stability. Not only that, his League of Villains (well two villains right now, counting Kurogiri) would gain traction in the media, and publicity is always a plus. Tomura could use this to expand the League and his influence across Japan.

As much as he wanted his plan to go in any of these ways, Tomura knew he had to be prepared for any scenario — even his failure.

His third outcome was that if All Might defeated his nomu (which should not be possible due to its extraordinary power), then he should retreat and build up his forces again for another attack.

Unfortunately for Tomura, his attack on USJ resulted in the final outcome.

He escaped with three-ish, four-ish, five-ish bullet wounds, no USJ underlings and no nomu, not even its bloody body.

At this point, he was just glad he had the foresight to plan his failure. Not only were his underlings arrested, the nomu was apprehended by All Might, and he proved to be stronger than ever, despite Sensei insisting All Might has been drastically harmed in their last battle together.

He needed a fucking drink.

“Kurogiri, I’m heading out.”

The door slammed shut and Tomura disappeared into the night.

oOo

You, on the other hand, were having the time of your life.

Exams were finally over and that meant you could finally release your inhibitions, in the form of obnoxiously loud music and sweaty clubs.

You had just finished a lovely evening out with your boyfriend and friends. After a night of raving and dancing and (fairly) responsible drinking, you were just coming out of the club and on your way home.

Your boyfriend went to his apartment earlier before you, a few hours ago due to “something”. You couldn’t hear him clearly above the booming music, you assumed it was because of his chronically weak stomach. He always said that, whether it be nights out or dates. You brushed it off like it was nothing because his health mattered first.

He’ll make up for it.

Probably.

oOo

It was around 4am when it happened.

“What the fuck?” You yelped and found yourself sprawled on the floor, outside a closed bar. The street was empty, save for a few stray cats, occasionally yowling into the night.

The mass you ended up being entangled with was wearing a black hoodie. Dishevelled hair could be seen peeking out from the hood - light coloured, a stark contrast to his hoodie.

You sat up straight on the floor, trying to make sense of what was happening, veins pulsing. You could hear shallow breaths coming from the body turned away beside you.

You tried to shake the person awake, he groaned and the stench of alcohol and iron greeted you. His shoulder felt slightly damp too. You raised your hand up slightly to the yellowing street-light. Your hand had a tinge of orange, leaning more to the red side.

Blood?

“Oi, get up,” You frantically whispered into the person’s ear, “You’re fucking bleeding!”

He started mumbling incoherently under his breath. You could make out weak swears and a few mentions of “stupid fucking heros”.

You stumbled to your feet, pulling him up with you, surprisingly warm and pliant against your shoulder. You wrapped his arm around yourself to steady the two of you.

“Come on, we’re off to the hospital.”

As if snapped out of a trance, the man tried to tear himself from you and shook his head furiously. The both of you barely managed to stay standing, leaning against the nearest rough wall.

He was already facing you, when you looked at him, his eyes glaring at you, as if you were the scum of the earth.

Your hand gripped onto his wrist to steady your centre of gravity. His fist was clenched, so tightly that each knuckle looked like they would burst from his skin to reveal blood as dark as his eyes.

His brows were furrowed furiously.

You frowned at him back.

You could make out the dry skin on his forehead and, despite this, his face was surprisingly good-looking. A faint scar trailing from his cheek to his mouth caught your attention. You started to wonder where he got it from, an accident? Or was it a self-inflicted wound from scratching?

You were a bit drunk still, but the situation was causing you to sober up.

You sighed and tried to signal to him that you were only here to help.

“No hospitals,” he croaked, words low and slurred, “h-hate them.”

You agreed as to not agitate him further, “Let’s go to my boyfriend’s then. His apartment is only a street away from here.”

The man’s face contorted into a look of scepticism, as a strained “why” was pulled from his lips.

“First aid kit.”

He stared at you for a moment, debating on something, before mumbling, “I can walk by myself.”

oOo

Tomura should’ve just drank at the hideout. It was a literal bar after all, however he wanted to get away from all the scheming, nagging and his failure.

And so, into the barrel he went.

“I’m hungry.” He mumbled, eyes glazed over slightly as he stared at the head in front of him.

He was met with a hum in agreement.

“We’re almost there,” You took a breath, “but there’s a convenience store on the corner.”

He doesn’t know why you’re even doing this.

Helping him outside that bar and trying to care for his wounds brought you nothing. You looked so soft.

Stupid sidekicks and their idiot saviour complexes. Tomura was starting to get annoyed. It would be so easy to just turn you into dust.

Poof.

He concluded that it was pity driving your actions.

You looked non-threatening enough and you were still slightly buzzed. He would go through with this and then you would part ways and never see each other again. It didn’t seem like you recognised him.

A roll of bandages came into his view. The convenience store lights were harsh white and made the bandages seem brighter than they were. His head was starting to throb a bit.

“The big roll or the small roll?”

��Small.”

You raised an eyebrow.

Out on the dark streets, you couldn't see him very clearly, let alone his injuries, but in the store, it looked like his hoodie was drenched with blood from his shoulder to the middle of his chest. Even his black sweats were glowing in red if you looked at him from a certain angle. You were still deciding whether you should just cart him to the hospital after all.

You chucked the big roll of bandages in your basket. It was already full of a variety of sweets.

You giggled at the basket.

“What are you laughing at?” Tomura accused, miffed due to his answer being ignored.

“You don’t seem like a sweets guy.”

“Anyone can have sweets.”

“Just saying.”

“Right.” He answered dryly.

“Why are you all bloody?”

“Why are you buying bandages?” He shot back, “I thought your boyf had a first aid kit?”

“Because I don’t think he’ll have enough,” you gestured to all of him. “for your situation.”

“Stupid sidekick.” He muttered.

You rolled your eyes and leaned towards him, “So! Why are you head to toe in blood?” You said with a slight lilt in your voice.

Tomura wondered if you were still a little drunk. He was one to talk.

“Because I ripped a few stitches while drinking.”

“And how did you rip them?”

“Some guys were yapping about how hard ‘All Our Heroics’ was — even when he downloaded the helpers mod for it.” He answered in disgust, “All I did was engage in a conversation with him and told him how stupid he was. And then, we ended up in … disagreement.”

“Clearly.” You deadpanned. “Still. Where did you get your stitches from?”

“Work.”

“Work?”

“Yes.”

“Ah. Sue them?”

“Sue them.”

“Annihilate them?”

“Sure, annihilate.” He gave a faint smile.

OoO

By the time you arrived outside at your boyfriend’s place, the sun was starting to rise. A melody of colours took to the skies: swirling clouds painted the perfect picture of peace.

You stopped in your tracks and gazed upwards. Tomura ended up walking into your back. He cursed, as the two of you stumbled.

“This again?” He hissed, “We already knew you couldn’t walk straight at that bar and now you're sending me flying?”

You laughed at him.

“Just look up. Isn’t that pretty.”

“No.”

“Zip it before I push you.”

“Technically, you did.”

“Even more technically, you pushed me. You walked into me.”

“Yeah, exactly, walked into you, not pushed.”

You grinned at him and rolled your eyes.

You walked into the elevator and Tomura followed you in. The two of you were in a comfortable and easy silence.

You were walking to the door before you just suddenly stopped. Tomura prevented himself from bumping into you.

“Seriously? Again, again? I almost dropped our stuff.”

“Sorry about that, but I just remembered, what’s your name? I’ve just been calling you the bloody-hoodie guy in my head.” You questioned.

“I don’t give my name to strangers.”

You stared at him incredulously and gave him your name.

“There, we’re not strangers anymore.”

He was silent.

“People also don’t follow strangers to their homes.” You pointed out, “What’s your name?”

“S-Shimura Tenko.”

“I feel like you just made that up just now.”

“Aw. Shucks.”

You shook your head at him while you opened the door.

The two of you walked in and what greeted you shocked you both. You dropped your plastic bag full of junk food and bandages on the floor and stormed further into the apartment.

Two bodies were on the couch, near the balcony, heads close together and lips touching. Unneeded sounds of pleasure could be heard from where the two of you were standing. They were kissing. Very passionately.

Ouch.

You yelled out your boyfriend’s name in flaming anger.

Two heads turned so quickly to look at you, you could’ve sworn you heard a crack.

It all became clear as you slotted the puzzle pieces together.

“So, you never had chronic diarrhoea,” you sneered, words dripping with sarcasm, “you had a chronic case of cheating scumbag!”

Your boyfriend’s face was flushed when you came in, but it became even redder as you glared at him.

A resounding smack made its way through the room, making you turn your attention towards the other person on the couch.

“I was with you for two years! You fu-“

“What?” You exploded, “You literally asked me out a few months ago. How dare you do that to your partner!” You followed that with curses.

Out of nowhere, laughter echoed. And three heads turned towards Tomura. His laughter was bright and full of amusement.

When he finally stopped, a stunned silence filled the room and he spoke, “So,” he started in the same tone as you when you spoke to your boyfriend, “you’re no sidekick, you’re a sidechick!” He started to laugh again.

You stared at him in pure shock, anger dissipating into slight amusement.

“That was a shit joke.” You said after you managed to dig some words out.

“Who’s he?” Your ex-boyfriend accused, “Were you cheating on me? With that?”

It was your turn to laugh as you told him that you weren’t cheating on him but you were only helping a poor guy out, while he was being scummy.

“I’ve had enough of this,” you frowned, “We’re leaving Shimura!”

You marched over to him and grabbed his wrist.

“No, don’t use your quirk here!” Your ex pleaded, “The landlord is going to have my head.”

You huffed out a self-satisfied puff of air. “Watch me!”

“I hope you don’t mind too much. We’re off to my place.” You muttered to Tomura.

“Oi! What are you trying to-“

Tomura was cut off before he finished his sentence.

He fell through the floor with the convenience store bags grasped tightly in his hands, with your hand gripping his wrist. His pinky was aching and his head ached even more.

He yelled as he found himself on the floor with you once more, legs tangled and things rolling around on the now-dusty ground.

The two of you were laying on the ground, looking at the white ceiling. Tomura could see the walls in the corner of his eye, the colour of it matched your top.

“Sorry about that.” Your voice coming from his right, “My quirk is Rabbit Hole. I can teleport by creating literal holes in the ground. That’s why we are at mine right now and not at that idiot’s.”

“I couldn’t have guessed. Ha.” Tomura replied, oddly calm, “If I touch things with all of my fingers, I can make things turn to dust. That’s why the ground is all dusty.”

You hummed in reply.

“I’m really fucking tired.”

“Same.”

“What’s the time?”

“Shit, if I know.”

“I hoped I left a massive hole at that asshole’s. I hope that it went through all his plumbing and that his apartment is flooding right now!”

“He’s going to sue you.”

“So? Sue me!”

[preciadosbass]

INTRO 👾

🦴# i’m jaime, 14, scenemo, and i talk a lot. my favourite people are: jaime preciado, chi cheng, sam rivers, max green, patrick stump, spencer smith, paul gray, leigh whannell, mikey way, kellin quinn, + lots more

◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️◾️▪️

🕷️# favourite bands (brace yourself): pierce the veil, get scared, gerard way, the used, escape the fate, under oath, sleeping with sirens, falling in reverse, fall out boy, jaime preciado, mcr, ls dunes, frank iero, hawthorne heights, alesena, [pre split + post split] panic! at the disco, skinless, rob zombie, leathermouth, good charlotte, the smashing pumpkins, korn, bullet for my valentine, peelingflesh, all time low, attack attack!, shoot the girl first, deadbeat nightlife, never shout never, picture me broken, chomp chomp attack! etc

🎮# interests: [special interests] plane crashes, mass tradgedies, psychology, true crime, zombie apocalypses, vampires, alt fashion [hyperfixations] chi cheng + jaime preciado, urbex/wildlife photography, saw, roller coaster crashes, alt music/scenes, horror. [films/series] jackass, trainspotting, skins (uk), final destination, saw, coraline, jennifer’s body, austin powers, the last of us, silent hill, resident evil, edward scissor hands, pearl, stay, any crime series +

🗝️# hobbies: journaling [obviously], listening to music, collecting cds/vinyl, collage, make pins/diy clothes + accessories, urbex/wildlife photography, going on walks, making ocs, rollerblading, making patches, attending concerts +

🐗# extra info: AUDHD [hence why everything is so interest based with me], chronic oversharer, possible TW for any diary posts [not an ed blog, i just vent] [concerts] attended: cavalera conspiracy/23, pierce the veil/24. upcoming: slipknot/dec, falling in reverse/dec. my posts will consist of band related reposts, inconsistent journaling, my photography and whatever else i feel like putting out. only been in the scene for 2ish years.

‘key’ for if your going to read any of my journals: boris — my cat, prevision — a keyworker i have to see instead of being taken back into mainstream education. i generally see two once a week, tuesday and thursday. acquaintance — somebody i just know. they’re not my friend, they’re not nice to me-i just know them.

if your interested in any of the same things as me/also journal/also from the uk [etc] please moot me !!

enjoy your day/night O_o

[dr9com9ge-ix]

Hiya! Tis been a bit since I took it easy for my birthday a few days ago! (slept so much and ate cheesecake and passed out) Soooo I wanted to make an ID for Erik that was this specific hot pink and couldn’t think of anything else aside from making a color fixer! Wee bit of story and about them under the cut!

March 15th 980,

In the backstreet town of Hamelin, the streets where run rampant with crime and violence. Today would seem to be the same as any other until suddenly a melody played and lured in members of the local gang.

Then came the long shrill sound of a horn when the music stopped, Even at a far distance it hurt to listen to but what happened to the crowd was worse than just a headache- The sound had made their heads explode! And stood in the midst of the bodies was a young fellow in pink lowering the horn. Naturally the folks who witnessed this where terrified- But the kid just smiled and waved.

“All done! They won’t bother you guys anymore!~”

And thus the town was much safer… Albeit shaken up by the mass amount of death that had occurred. This piper would introduce themself as “Letze” and soon after word spread of this incident and of other similar ones. Eventually Letze would be let into a nest alongside their family who had run the formerly unknown Parade workshop.

And that is the tale of the color fixer, The Pink Piper.

Fun facts!

- Letze uses They/them pronouns.

- They are based on the pied piper of Hamelin!

- The pink colors of their outfit and weapon are entirely their idea as pink is their favorite color.

- They are deaf but have a hearing aid integrated into their prosthetics. They also turn it off when they do not want to be bothered.

- Their expressions (at least with their eyes) kind of work like how cats do- Squinty eyes when happy and big eyes and pupils when they’re about to attack.

- The Parade workshop is responsible for Letze’s prosthetics and the creation of the horn

- Letze is the youngest out of 3 adopted siblings with similar yet more crude prosthetics.

- They are very relaxed outside of their job and likes to paint and watch movies and plays in theaters. Also no thoughts half the time they’re just enjoying the downtime before they’re sent to do more work.

- While they do like the horn’s sound they prefer to listen to rock.

- The horn is for work use only.

[ifearzombies]

Yet MORE Headcanons about life in the HoL

Previous post here with links to the other two: [x]

- On days that Levi’s depression is REALLY bad, you pull the futon into his room and you and Mammon keep him company.

- You have more contact with the Human Realm than you did your first year and call friends and relatives. Every call, without fail, is interrupted. Usually by Mammon.

- Asmodeus has been given clearance to have fun with your friends in bed. He does NOT, however, have clearance to have sex with relatives. Your single friends visit with Asmo a lot and the next morning you talk with them over the phone or at the table about how talented he is. He LOVES it.

- You have a weekly trip to Wail-mart for condoms and lube. They have a bag ready for you every Friday at this point. If you’re a fem!MC and forget one week, the next bag has a pregnancy test.

- You told Satan there’s a musical called ‘Cats’. You two now sing songs from the Broadway show and have gone to it several times. You don’t talk about the movie version. Satan has decided the movie doesn’t exist. His favorite cat is Rum Tum Tugger since he’s defiant to Munkustrap.

- You wanted to watch ‘Ratatouille’ with everyone. Barbatos was horrified the movie even exists and destroyed the disc in your hand. You tried to tell him and the more you tell him, the paler he gets. The movie gets put on the banned list. This also extended to ‘Secret of Nimh’ and ‘Flushed Away’.

- Between working out with Beel, pampering and fashion with Asmo, etiquette lessons with Barbatos and Lucifer, and Belphegor helping you sleep more peacefully you are healthier than you’ve ever been.

- You’ve learned a lot of magic and you and Solomon taught some of your friends. A few of them want to go to RAD for a few years. You’re working out details with Diavolo and the Celestial Realm, but Diavolo is ecstatic.

- You got Beel the 5lb gummy bears and worms. Also a few of the giant Hershey kisses. Beel hadn’t known there were snacks that big and he was so happy to find out. Though he struggled to eat the bear. It was pretty cute.

- As a gag gift you got Asmo one of those 55 gallon drums of lube. It backfired because he absolutely loved it and he took it to an orgy party with cubi later that week.

- You’ve just now sworn off singing any songs dealing with depression or dark topics. You sang ‘I was meant to be yours’ from Heathers and like with the ‘My R’ incident, house was in mass panic. Simeon was asked to counsel you again and he still was a bit confused but was glad you were OK. Solomon, however, laughed his ass off.

- You found out some of your older relatives were super uber religious and hated everyone but Simeon and Luke. And then you found out one was racist when they said something horrible about Simeon. Simeon had never heard the slur before, but once you explained the meaning, he cried. Satan nearly went to the Human Realm to teach them a lesson, but you reassured they weren’t worth it. They weren’t your family anymore. Everyone in the Devildom was. And you were cutting that relative out. You also cut the super religious ones after they insulted your demons. 

- You watched ‘Shrek The Musical’ with Levi and Mammon. You’ve caught them both belting out songs from the soundtrack. You filmed both of them.

- You jammed out to ‘Like a Prayer’ and Simeon joined in. Asmo then said the song was about sex and Simeon nearly passed out. You explained that it’s actually about being so in love with God that the singer feels he’s an actual boyfriend/man in her life. You debated heavily on this while Simeon had a panic attack. It’s ‘Like a virgin’ that’s about sex.

- You bought Belphie one of those space globes that turn the room into outer space when the light goes out. He and Beel love it.

- You’ve discovered songs about the Devil promoting evil actually really hurt Diavolo’s feelings. Especially ‘When You’re Evil’. He caught you listening and he nearly cried and asked if you thought he was really like that. You had to reassure him that was not the case. Beel heard the song and was just confused why his name was confused with other people in there.

- A few relatives were concerned you decided to emigrate to actual literal Hell. Those whose opinions you ACTUALLY care about, you invited them with permission from Diavolo and Lucifer. By the end, your relatives loved your chosen family. Some of them send gifts to the Devildom just for them and each item sent is treated like a treasure by the recipient. 

[itwasntimethatdidit40]

Hey there!

I wanted to post that for a while so, here we are.

Wondering who’s behind this blog?

Here’s something about me under the cut:

• I identify as a woman, my pronouns are she/her

• Born and raised in Italy, I still live there.

• I’m 141 LOL but according to people I still look like I’m in my 30s so let me indulge in that, thank you very much.

• I don't think there's anyone who makes me more feral than Joel Miller. I just can’t help it. My (un)holy Pedro characters triad is Joel, Oberyn and Peña 💕 (immediately followed by Frankie)

• I have a little elephant pendant that I always wear, no one knows what it's about *wink*

• I’m Leo Sun, Libra Rising and Aries Moon. You scared? I promise I don’t bite, unless explicitly requested 😏

• I’m Bi/Pan as fuck, always been obviously but I realized only last year. LOL, better late than never i guess. I only have problems with cisgender straight white males because I mean… they’re the worst, okay, I don’t make the rules.

• Single, unmarried, not interested in having kids even a little bit, I prefer to be the cool auntie.

• I love cooking and I'm quite good at it, I had good genes from my Italian grandmas 😌

• I can’t function without coffee, especially in the morning. I take my coffee bitter with just a little bit of milk.

• I can’t stand lies, the phrase “oh I didn't tell you so as not to make you suffer” (UGH, no you didn’t tell me ‘cause you’re a fucking coward and that’s it, my friend), misogyny, racism, fascism, homophobia, bi-erasure, any other form of verbal or physical violence towards LGBTQIA+ people, injustice in general, if you are any of the above you are not welcome here or in my life.

• I love dogs. I have a poodle named Brienne after the GOT character, she’s 5 years old so that means she got me through pandemic and she’s my love and joy. Isn’t she adorable? Yes, she is.

• I’m unfortunately allergic to cats (yep, like Pedro) and can’t pet them unless I wish for an asthma attack. That sucks, I know.

• I have deep brown curly hair, brown eyes and I’m short (158 cm).

• I have a lot of freckles, you could go on a treasure hunt following them.

• I’ve been to more than 100 concerts in my life including some festivals abroad.

• I currently listen to Hozier and Chappell Roan on a daily basis. I also love Billie Eilish, used to be a big Muse fan (listen, their first albums were great, okay) plus I’m a sucker for ‘90/‘00 music ‘cause that’s the music I grew up with.

• I love beer more than wine.

• I love reading, I used to read all the time, I have less time to do it now and it bothers me so much. I’m still reading fanfiction though. 🤭

• I’m a sucker for True Crime Podcasts, I only listen to Italian ones for now so unless you’re Italian you don’t know my faves and it’s a pity ‘cause they’re really good.

• Cults scare the shit out of me but at the same time they’re one of the things that makes me more curious ‘cause my mind can’t really comprehend what happens in people’s mind when they get sucked into them.

• Some tv series I love in no particular order: The Last of Us, Breaking Bad, Better Call Saul, Lost, The Handmaid’s Tale, Bojack Horseman, GOT (until seasons 7 & 8 happened 💀), Sense 8, Jane the Virgin, Grace and Frankie, Narcos, Only Murders in the building, The Bear, Succession, The Morning Show, Friends, Stranger Things (mostly because Jim Hopper is there, certainly not for those z*onists, you know), Mad Men, Gilmore Girls (Luke Danes *cough*), Mindhunter, Peaky Blinders (huge Tommy Shelby’s slut, don’t look at me like that, okay), My Brilliant Friend, The Affair, Black Mirror (until last seasons happened but it used to be one of the greatest things ever), The Walking Dead (got bored halfway through season 9, I recently started a rewatch and I hope to get to the very end of it lol), Fleabag, Normal People, When They See Us, Hill House, Bly Manor, Midnight Mass, Chernobyl.

• Films I love in no particular order: Parasite, Aftersun, Past Lives, All of Us Strangers, Brokeback Mountain, Almost Famous, The Goonies, Stand By Me, The Breakfast Club, The Killing of a Sacred Deer, The Lobster, The Neon Demon, Midsommar, One Day, When Harry Met Sally, There’s still tomorrow, Strange Way of Life, Prospect, The Banshess of Inisherin, Coco, The Emperor’s New Groove (so underrated), Mommy, The Virgin Suicides, Girls Interrupted, Saltburn, Promising Young Woman, Little Women (1994), Gone Girl, Shoplifters, Bin-Jip 3 Iron, Love Me If You Dare, The Piano, Fried Green Tomatoes, Notorious, Some like it Hot, Rear Window and you can ask for my Letterboxd account for more.

• Bad weather makes me sad and melancholy.

• I obviously love Italian cuisine with all my heart but I also love to try new dishes especially when I’m abroad. I love chocolate and I have a sweet tooth in general but there’s nothing I crave more than good carbs (I can be happy with a slice of good bread or focaccia). I love spicy food but I can't handle it when it’s very very spicy.

• I love bags, I have so many bags and I still want more lol

• When I was a kid I wanted to be a writer or a journalist. What do I do now? I’m a secretary LOL (I also have a second job not related to writing as well)

• As a friend, I’m loyal to the bone, I could do anything for you if I love you. If you betray me real bad though don’t expect a second chance, I mean I could try but I know i can’t ‘cause you’re changed forever in my eyes.

• I have so many kinks, you can ask if you want to know, okay. Also, so many authors here are responsible for giving me new ones. I love you deeply.

If you want to know more my asks and dm are open!

Here’s a little bit of me, byeeeee.

[baejax-the-great]

End of Year Fanfic Rec List

I thought instead of five fic Friday, I'd go ahead and rec some of my favorite fics I've read this year.

Completed Fics:

A Young God's Heartbeat by @luddlestons. Thanatos x Zagreus (M). A modern AU in which Zagreus is a good Midwestern boy going on an impromptu road trip with the god of death while his father tries to murder him.

Reap the Whirlwind by @stripyjamjar. Thanatos x Zagreus (M). Zagreus was raised by his grandmother in a secluded garden, but that doesn't stop Thanatos from stumbling on him and striking up a friendship. Upon learning of his parents, Zagreus breaks into Hades to find them.

Cantata by @swaps55. M!Shepard x Kaidan (M). Almost 200k words of Mass Effect prequel and hopeless pining on the part of Kaidan Alenko. Action, adventure, found family, and space cadets in love.

regreso el amor by artifice. Achilles x Patroclus (M). A short fic of music, growing up together, and pining between friends.

Fics I hope to see next year (aka WIPs!):

Twin Flames by @johaerys-writes. Achilles x Patroclus (E). Patroclus is the squire to his best friend, the Prince of Phthia, who left him behind for years. Now he faces icy silence and icy conditions as he accompanies him to his wedding.

Fugue by @swaps55. M!Shepard x Kaidan (M). About a month into their relationship, the Normandy is attacked. Some of the best angst I've read, and the chapter on the Normandy going down is honestly a must-read.

Face to Face by @juliafied. Thanatos x Zagreus (M). After Zagreus disappeared while Thanatos was in college, he swipes him on a dating app. The result is so bitter and awkward and petty and delightful. Good luck, boys.

When Death Incarnate got banished to France by Marro. Thanatos x Zagreus (G). Thanatos is banished to live among mortals. It goes about as well as you'd expect. He gets a cat. It's adorable.

On the Ropes by @redsmear. Patroclus x Zagreus x Achilles (E). Zagreus picks up a boxing coach and a new Dom at the same time. No reason to believe they know each other or that the angst will have you staring listlessly out a window for hours.

[lover-also-fighter-also]

from the ship asks! for Anitha x Griffin: 34 + 35 for Harshith x Aurora: 92 + 73 for Tanya x Flynn: 46 for Ria x Maria: 71

thank you 💐 (i know i know, it’s a lot!! don’t feel obligated to answer everything if its just far too much!!)

Thank you soo much for these asks @choicesmc . I am eager to give answers to all of them.

Asks list here

For Anitha x Griffin:

34. who takes longer to understand a joke or reference?

I would say it depends on what the joke or the reference is. Griffin is new to attuneless traditions and references, he might miss a joke that Anitha says on the fly. One of them is the mistletoe instance in Winters Past, where Griffin didn't understand the whole 'kissing under the mistletoe' thing.

On the other hand, Anitha still has to learn a lot of the attuned world outside Penderghast, and is still excited on learning about the attuned references.

35. who hides in the other’s arms during a horror movie?

Though Anitha is not really afraid of horror movies, she sometimes pretends to get scared, just to bury herself in Griffin's arms, and feel his warmth.

For Tanya x Flynn

46. what do they do on vacation?

During active vacations, Flynn takes Tanya to the small towns surrounding Birchport, to explore the ambiance of a different place. Or if its a lazy weekend, they both like to take their blankets up onto the roof of Flynn's boathouse and either play some music, or simply do some stargazing.

For Harshith x Aurora

73. what was their first kiss like?

Okay, so their first kiss happens post Harshith's chemical attack in book 2. Until the moment Harshith came out of the hospital room, Aurora has been on her toes about whether he would be alright or not, and the anxiety had kept her working the whole night to find the cure for him. When Harshith got settled in his room, Aurora wanted to check on him one more time before going back to Mass Kenmore, and instinctively she pulled him close and gave him a huge hug. Harshith asks softly, 'Is this just friendship Aurora, or is it something more?' In response to that, Aurora brings him closer and gives him a long kiss. Before leaving the room, she says 'Does that answer your question?'

92. soulmates!au. how are they connected? do they have matching tattoos, names written on them, etc.

In an au, maybe they would be academic rivals in the same school, competing for who gets the best grades, proficiency in their extracurriculars and for the valedictorian title. Their romance would be the kind of Ben + Devi kind (from Never Have I Ever). They realize their feelings for each other only a few days before graduation, and before they both leave for their respective colleges they each get a tattoo of half an infinity symbol on both their hands so that they never let go of each other. (Im sorry if this is bad! This is my first time trying an au and the concept is a little out o place)

For Ria x Maria

71. What does their future look like?

So according to canon, Maria attends Terman U after graduating from Berry High, but nothing is specified about what she ends up doing. So according to my HC, Maria either does a Business major or a Political Science major, which I have not decided on yet.

As for Ria, till her senior year she was convinced that she should take up a music major, but then realized that her heart wasn't much into making music her profession. She loved writing poetry and fiction, and eventually she does an English Major at NYU. She and Maria maintain a long distance relationship till Maria moves to New York after her graduation.

They take some time to get settled with their respective careers and lifestyles, and finally after 8 years of being in a relationship, Maria proposes marriage.

I HC that they end up living in a cozy apartment with 2 cats and a hamster. Eventually, they adopt a 5 year-old girl named Andrea.

[ask-de-writer]

WIND MEETS THE ROM : Part 23 of 27 :

MLP Fan Fiction

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WIND MEETS THE ROM

Part 23 of 27

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

Cover art by @wind-the-mama-cat

54212 words

© 2023 by Glen Ten-Eyck

Writing begun 06/01/18

All rights reserved. This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights. They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact. They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions.

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

///////////////////////

New to the story? Read from Part 1, here!

///////////////////////

Wind reached into her coin box, surprised at how much was in there, and extracted a few silver bits. She started by simply making one roll across her fingers, flipping across one finger, looking like it must fall between that finger and the next but instead, flopping on over the next. When it reached the end of her hand, it vanished, flipping up between her thumb and the index finger, where it was tossed into the air and seemed to disappear!

The errant coin flipped spinning and flashing up and landed in her palm. Tossing it up, it appeared to become two that traveled in a circle, chasing each other. While that was happening, a third coin was crawling across Wind's other hand. It seemed to leap of its own volition to join its other two in the circle dance, now of three coins, sparkling in the sunlight.

One by one, they vanished, until Wind held but one. She extended her hand, showing the coin to Hanar. As Hanar reached for it, it too vanished. Wind stared at her empty hand, making futile little grabbing motions.

With a rueful smile, she picked up an empty clear glass drinking tumbler and poured the three coins out of it, into her hand.

The flashing, sparkling, active coins had drawn a substantial crowd who were watching respectfully. One, a local pegasus, had his wings slightly spread.

Awestruck, he said softly, “I don't believe it. She didn't use any magic at all.”

Hanar, ever the opportunist, was circulating the coin box at once! Seeing the way that things were going, Wind bowed to the crowd. She was rewarded by a mix of Rom trills and the clapping of hooves.

The applause was interrupted by a loud call of, “There she is, officer! That thing on its hind legs! It assaulted me for no cause at all! Gave me that big old bruise on my shoulder! Earlier this morning, it attacked my brother too!”

It was the blue green unicorn that had heckled her and later tried to mess with her staff work demonstration. He had a Royal Road Policepony along with him.

One of the foals from the crowd, the young pegasus, told the officer, “He's lying, Sir! I saw it because I was watching this Rom that goes on her hind legs do her staff demonstration.” He flexed his wings a little. “You know that some pegassi can feel magic through their wings, right? I can do that.

“I was watching and using my wings to see if she was using magic to do that amazing work with her staff. She was not.” He pointed to the blue green unicorn and went on, “He did, though! Shot his magic real sneaky weak right into where her hand things were.

“She had to spin away while the staff slid almost out of her grip! While it was out of control, it hit him hard on the shoulder. If she had lost her grip, some foal among us watching would likely have gotten hit! Hard as it slapped him, it probably would have sent us to the first aid tent!”

The officer nodded thoughtfully. “He used his magic to interfere with her demonstration?”

The unicorn snapped, “It was a harmless prank! She had it coming for getting my brother arrested this morning. So what if a foal or two got sent to the first aid tent when she lost control of that stick she was showing off with? She attacked me! Hit me with the stick instead of just letting it go! Arrest it and kill it! It isn't nothing but a trained animal of some kind!”

The RRP officer quietly brought out a horn cap and slapped it onto the unicorn's horn with the speed and skill of long experience! The unicorn fell heavily as an expertly placed hoof tripped him in mid turn as he tried to flee! He had hobbles on both forelegs and the officer was actively tightening the buckles of the horn cap before the unicorn could do anything further toward escape.

“Sir, you are under arrest for the Royal Road crimes of interfering with any business of a fair, attempting to cause injury to foals, lying to the Royal Road Police, and violation of the Edict of Equality.

“As a point of interest, I was the officer who arrested your brother this morning. He was stealing from a local merchant's cash box when this same Rom stopped him. She did not assault him, she very properly used minimal force to prevent him from continuing his criminal act.”

While the stunned unicorn was being led away, both the filly unicorn and the colt pegasus sat and stared at Wind. “You are more fun to watch than anything else at this fair! What are you going to do next?”

Wind shrugged, “Not sure. I don't have any proper spears to play with. Maybe some of my unarmed combat exercises or maybe some archery. What would you like to see?”

Her answer came from an unexpected quarter. An RRP officer requested, “I heard about those exercises and the demonstration that you gave up in Haymarket. If you don't mind, we of the RRP would like to see that, particularly where you demonstrated unarmed combat against a sword.”

The foals perked up at that! “Unarmed combat against a sword? That sounds neat! Do that please?”

“Since you and the RRP both want it, sure,” Wind replied.

The officer called, “Be right back! My buddies will want to see this too!” as he dashed off to the RRP pavilion.

When they returned, several of the officers had practice safeties on their swords!

Wind saw that and grinned. “Do you mind if I use my staff?”

They paused to look at each other. “Um, she beat a member of the Royal Guard with only one, uh, arm and NO weapons. What are we letting ourselves in for?”

The other answered doubtfully, “A learning experience?”

“That's what we came here for. Let's do it!”

Wind encouraged them, “I admit that it is a little unfair. I mean, now I have TWO arms and a staff. The two of you are a bit outnumbered by me.” She gave them cheerful smile along with the outrageous statement.

One asked doubtfully, “What do we need to do?”

Wind replied, “First, we need to establish a double perimeter, for the safety of our watchers. We don't go past the inside one and that keeps the ones on the outside of the outer one safe.”

Hanar was promptly by her side with decorative ropes and tall stakes! “How do you want it set up, Love? I brought you the show space ropes and stakes.”

Wind showed Hanar where she wanted the outer perimeter and the inner one as well. Hanar's magic flipped all of the stakes into their places at once, firmly set into the sod! The ropes sailed out and wrapped into knots around the top of each stake, creating the safety zone.

Saying nothing of the astounding display of Rom magic that she had just done, Hanar retreated to her booth. The watchers, many of whom were unicorns, did see it and appreciate the use of such precise and complex magic as if it were nothing of importance. More to the point, none of them could have duplicated the feat.

A goodly crowd was gathered, so Wind suggested, “Perhaps one of you good officers would like to take a cut at me?” She was standing, seemingly at her ease, her staff held in both hands vertically in front of her. “Any cut that you choose, feel free.”

One stepped forward and swung a low cut at her legs!

Wind had hopped up, allowing the sword to strike at the bottom half of the staff! That deflected the sword into the ground! Its contact with the staff helped it to rotate swiftly into a strike at her attacker! A meaty THUMP announced its strike against the side of his neck, just above the withers! Wind had landed gracefully and was holding the staff just as before.

He followed up with an angled strike at the center of her staff, between her hands! This time, she had spun, stepping back and lunging in as the sword went past! Her extending strike was blocked by his blade and missed him narrowly! He tried a strike straight forward along her staff! She angled it only a little and his sword point slid on the wood as it passed her. Her return strike thumped him on the neck beside his windpipe!

He backed off, lowering his sword. “Darn, Lady Wind, that thing is downright dangerous!”

Wind gave a lopsided grin as she retorted, “Most weapons are, that is why they are weapons, not toys!”

The remaining two charged at her while she was speaking! Wind did a spin and sidestep! Her staff slapped the sword of the one that she was stepping past toward his buddy. The other end of her staff completed its spin by going between his forelegs! His own momentum and Wind leaning against the stave crossing his shoulder, forced his foreleg up, unbalancing him! Wind finished the move by pushing him hard with her shoulder! He went down in a heap, entangling and tripping his buddy!

Wind stepped away from the mass of flailing pony legs and bodies with a grin. As she watched the mess, she commented, “Do you know what really makes something a weapon?”

The first, bruised officer, responded with a rueful grin, “Yep! If its in YOUR hands its a weapon!”

That brought a general laugh from the whole crowd! While they were laughing, Hanar, with perfect timing, was circulating through the throng with the coin box!

After the demonstration, Wind wandered down to Rose and consulted quietly with her for a bit.

She told Hanar, “I asked Rose if she could make me a bow and arrows. We went over the design pretty carefully. I figured that I would need a bow and arrows that were not only powerful, but showy too.”

Hanar grinned as she replied, “See, you are thinking like a true Rom! I loved that staff demonstration! Funny thing is, so did the RRP! I heard them sorting out all the things that happened and trying to figure out ways to counter them.”

Wind replied quietly, “I am glad to hear that. The RRP are good ponies. I hope that they did learn something useful from it.”

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[margo-mania]

are you on artfight!? are you a cats the musical fan!? do YOU have a cats OC??!! sighn up here to have your goober in the junkyard in a mass attack

[avioletstar092]

An introduction post

Hi this is an introduction /dni list.

My name is Cassidy or just Cass for short. im 15 years old AMAB. i`m dutch(NL) and I have a cat.

I`m aegoaroace(i think thats how you type that) and gender apathetic I use any pronouns except it

Things I Iike:

´the Magnus archives´, ´mass efect´, ´scp´, ´fallout´, ´the elder scrolls´, ´miracle musical´, ´mha´, ´stardew valley´, books in general, History and most tipes of science but mainly biology and astonomy

now for the dni list:

do not interact

the standard dni(queerphobes racists ablelists etc)

proshippers

rcta

terfs

toxic people

and stans of basicaly any fandoms(like if you`d actualy attack somone over a dissagrement about a fandom)

please interact(if you want to of course)

queer people

dissabled people

nuerospicy folks

anybody in the same fandoms

and of course ally`s are welcome too

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hello! I just found your blog and I'm already kind of impressed and obsessed!

Can I request an Obey me, Attack on Titans, and Demon Slayer and if you have the motivation Spy x Family matchup!

Name: I've been going by Cael and Lemon!

My Pronouns are she/her, but it really doesn't matter that much to me.

I'm a sex indifferent (leaning repulsed) asexual and a romantic favorable aromantic with really no gender preference.

My MBTI type is INFP-T and I think I'm a Virgo rising.

Appearance: I'm around 166 cm and I have ivory skin and greyish blue eyes. I have a lot of scars on my arms from animals and some from accidents as a child and One scar on my upper lip from a bouncy house incident when I was 10-11. I have medium curly, short hair that is almost always kept in a ponytail and I have curly fringe bangs. I have an hourglass figure, but relatively small chest and butt. I also have a condition where there are small red bumps on my upper arms and lower legs that I've had since I was like 5 and I'm really insecure about it. I also where glasses because my eyes suck. I'm kind of skinny, but have some muscle mass and I'm working on getting more.

Personality: I'm kind of a people pleasure and I can't stand to hear people fighting as I associate yelling with physical harm and I get really quite and I try to make myself smaller when I'm being yelled at or around people yelling. I usually have a hard time focusing when people talk to me and I show a lot of signs of adhd. I don't usually talk a lot, unless I'm around someone I trust and I have horrible anxiety when talking to new people. I do really like spending time with people though and I have a soft spot for protective and soft people, but at the same time I really like dominate people. I love laughing and usually surround myself by humorous people. I crave physical contact, but I'm very hesitant to actually touch anyone and I get really twitchy when someone stands next to me. I have an anxiety tick where my shoulders will jolt forward if someone I don't know or trust is standing near me. I'm also very attentive and if someone asks for my help I will be by there side as fast as I can. It takes a lot to get me to talk, unless you trigger one of my interests in which case it seems like I won't shut up. I'm a bit of a workaholic as in if I don't have anything to do I will kind of just rearrange my house so I have something to do. I love exploring and mysteries as well! I also have a tendency to cry when I'm angry, but I rarely cry when I'm actually sad.

Likes and Dislikes: I love reading, cooking, writing, video games, anime, languages, other counties cultures, cats, birds, snakes, and moths. I also tend to get in and out of toxicology and botany.

I really don't like yelling or loud noises, unless its music, and bright lights tend to freak me out too, as well as to much physical sensations. Curtain sounds such as towels and paper make me freak out too. I also hate mushy textures and foods like yogurt or applesauce. Self depricting jokes also set me off.

Hobbies: Reading, Writing, volleyball, weight lifting, and music.

Any extra information: I don't have a very good relationship with my family and I crave positive attention and compliments. I just really want someone to tell me that I'm enough. I also really love when people lightly trace over my skin, though usually I only let my bestfriend do it.

don't forget to drink water

~💞🍋

Hi Lemon! Aah, thank you! You're the first person to has said they're obsessed with my blog! I hope you like your matchup!

In Obey Me, I match you with...

A quietly supportive partner. He won't praise you excessively, but when he does, you know he really means it.

Enjoys spending rare moments where he's not busy reading with you on the couch. He'll be reading over your shoulder and softly running his fingers over your arms. He doesn't even realise he's doing it.

Doesn't raise his voice around you. He's used to yelling at his brothers but he'll tr his best to make sure he doesn't yell at them when you're around.

He never wants you to feel uncomfortable. As soon he notices your anxiety tick, he's scanning his surroundings to see who's standing too close to you and he's moving either the demon or you.

Enjoys listening to you talk about your interests. He can't promise he has much time but if you want to talk about your latest interest, he'll set aside some time for you.

Lucifer loves your cooking. He may tweak the chores slightly so you do more cooking (but only if that's okay with you).

In Attack on Titan, I match you with...

Mikasa is very good at making you feel cared about without being over the top about it.

She cares deeply about those she lets in and if that includes you, she wants to make sure you know that.

Mikasa's very quiet so you won't have to worry about loud noises from her. If someone else (Jean and Eren) start being too loud, she'll deal with it quickly and effectively.

Enjoys cooking with you. She needs some peace in her life and she finds spending time with you relaxing, especially if you're both working on something together. Cooking provides the perfect solution to that (even if she has to fend Sasha off with a spatula).

Very attentive of her surroundings. If someone looks like them might be getting too close to you, she's moving to stand between you and them.

No one's making her partner uncomfortable on her watch.

In Demon Slayer, I match you with...

Another quiet one. No loud noises are coming from this guy.

He also doesn't like loud noises so if things are getting too loud, he's grabbing your hand and leading you somewhere quieter.

He's not great at praising people but he'll try to complement you as frequently as he can. Whether it's a complement on your outfit, how you handled a situation, or your cooking, he'll give you little complements when he remembers to.

Speaking of cook, Giyu doesn't cook a whole lot but enjoys your cooking. If you'd like him to join you, he's more than happy to help.

Enjoys spending time relaxing with you, reading and listening to music. Giyu would love it if you would read out loud to him.

Just be prepared for him to fall asleep. He's overworked and your voice is very relaxing to him.

If he notices your anxiety twitch, he's going to lean in closer and ask if there's anything he can do to help. If he can help, he'll do whatever he can to help you feel more comfortable.

He'd be grateful if you could do the same for him. He's not great at asking for help but even just having someone consider him means a lot.

In Spy x Family, I match you with...

Yor is the perfect person to give you positive attention and compliments!

She's a great support person and she'll remember the smallest details about you just to she can see you smile when she presents you with a book you've been meaning to get for a while.

Please teach her how to cook. She's more than willing to learn and she'd love to be able to cook something for you one day that actually looks (and tastes) good.

Despite her assassin skills, she's not great at noticing when people are getting too close. They don't register as a threat to her.

But as soon as she sees your anxiety tick, she's politely asking the person to move. If they're being obnoxious, she's resorting to violence while apologizing profusely.

Not a super loud person (unless she's drunk) and she's very aware of noises so if something sounds like it's getting too loud, she'll try to take care of it before it becomes a problem.

[chrancecriber]

Chilltrax (May 31, 2023)

23:57 Feiertag - Saccharine 374 23:57 C H I L L T R A X - Cleanliness Don't You Agree 23:53 Jako Diaz & Leyet - Only You 23:49 Billie Eilish - Everything I Wanted (Aquadrop Remix) 23:45 Leaving Laurel - The Family We Find 23:41 Andre Aguado - Through The Night 23:36 Northern Form - Mend 23:36 C H I L L T R A X - Chilltrax - Chill Out Piano 23:32 Jones Meadow - Paint 23:27 Booka Shade & Satin Jackets - Fusion Royale 23:23 Teemid - L.a. 23:18 Volen Sentir & Makebo - Into The Stars 23:13 Deep Sound Effect Feat. Svetlana Voice - Dreaming About You (Dj Aristocrat Remix) 23:09 Wassu & Mimi Page - Within Me 23:09 C H I L L T R A X - The Chillout Channel Redux 23:05 Valante - Vana 23:01 Two Lanes - Searching (Ct Fixup Mix) 22:57 Edapollo Feat. Akacia - Run 22:54 Emmit Fenn - What Falling In Love Is For 22:51 Finding Mero - In Loving Memories 22:48 Armin Van Buuren Feat. James Newman - Therapy (Sebastian Davidson Remix) 22:48 C H I L L T R A X - Magnifyingglasssogood4u 22:44 Xixi Feat. Kwesi - Close To U 22:40 Tep No Feat. Starzun - Hold Me 22:37 Rocket Empire - Lima 22:33 Leisure - Slipping Away (Flight Facilities Remix) 22:32 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Dzihan 22:29 Fløa (Floa) - Pictures Of You 22:26 Aftruu - Falling Asleep 22:22 Childish Gambino - Feels Like Summer 22:17 Nicholas Gunn Feat. Chris Howard - Thought Of You 22:13 Shingo Nakamura - Focus 22:13 C H I L L T R A X - Jimpster 1 22:08 Elderbrook - Wasted On You 22:05 Henry Green - Realign 22:01 Arto - Now You're Gone 21:56 Chris Malinchak - Saving My Love 21:52 Beacon - Im U 21:52 C H I L L T R A X - Escape The Noise 21:48 Heard Right & Fløa - Enough 21:44 George Fitzgerald & Syml - Mother 21:40 53 Thieves - Heights 21:36 Sons Of Maria - It Takes So Long 21:36 C H I L L T R A X - Glitchy Toh 21:31 Blonde Maze - A Break In Continuity (Forty Cats Remix) 21:27 Feiertag - Didn't Know Why (You Lost Your Soul) 21:23 Eric Hilton Feat. Brian Jackson - Something For Byrd 21:18 Tsha - I Know 21:18 C H I L L T R A X - Cool Refreshed Smooth As Can Be 21:14 Everything But The Girl - Forever 21:11 Odesza Feat. Maro - Better Now 21:07 Kc Lights Feat. Leo Stannard - Cold Light (6am Remix) 21:02 Blank & Jones - Floatation 20:57 Massive Attack - Teardrop 20:57 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Freesound 20:52 Reel People & Muhsinah - Something New (Kraak & Smaak Remix) 20:47 Mass Digital - Thoughts Of U 20:43 Sum Wave - Moments Of Sundown 20:39 Kx5 & Sofi Tukker - Sacrifice (St Mix) 20:36 Che Jose Feat. Jodie Knight - Freedom (Mass Digital Remix Edit) 20:35 C H I L L T R A X - World Comes To Chilltrax.com 20:32 Chill Cole - Liquid Life 20:27 Baile & Haulm - Knows No End 20:23 Jan Blomqvist & Malou - Alone 20:19 Approaching Black - Sensitive 20:14 Royksopp Feat. Astrid S - Let's Get It Right 20:14 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Cymbal Roll Bass 20:11 Indigo Eyes Feat. Kehina - All Over Again (Remix) 20:07 Flexible Fire - Amatista 20:04 Armin Van Buuren & Matoma Feat Teddy Swims - Easy To Love 20:00 Alampa - Playoff 19:56 Slow Hearts - Endora 19:55 C H I L L T R A X - Take Me Away! 19:52 Vandelux - All I've Ever Known 19:47 A.m.r & Lumynesynth - Unfinished 19:43 Palladian - Zagara 19:39 Edapollo - Standing There 19:35 Khotin & Tess Roby - Fountain, Growth 19:35 C H I L L T R A X - Street Life Worlds Cc 19:31 Maxxim - Waterfalls 19:28 Lp Giobbi Feat. Caroline Byrne - Another Life 19:25 Satin Jackets Feat. Tailor - Relapse 19:20 Duckmaw - Distant Worlds 19:17 Boerd Feat. Stella Explorer - Another Life 19:12 Cinnamon Chasers - Surviving The Fire 19:12 C H I L L T R A X - E-chilled-music 19:09 Bonsaye - Kismet 19:05 Jones Meadow & Clara Mendes - Em Baixo 19:02 53 Thieves - Two Days 18:58 Jos & Eli & Eli & Fur - Riffs Of The Night 18:55 Dex 1200 - Ongea Nami 18:51 Lana Del Rey - Doin' Time (Chilltrax Mix) 18:51 C H I L L T R A X - Trans Europe Vocoder 18:45 Steven Weston Feat. Tae - Same Dream 18:41 Cannons - Tunnel Of You 18:37 Il:lo - Ink 18:32 Nox Vahn & Marsh - Come Together 18:32 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Moon Boots 18:27 Alison Goldfrapp - The Beat Divine 18:22 Two Lanes - Movement 18:18 Heard Right Feat. Phoebe Tsen - Pulling Me Under 18:14 Elderbrook - The End 18:09 Zaven - Passive Activity (Evren Furtuna Remix) 18:09 C H I L L T R A X - Fresh And Fascinating 18:04 Nicholas Gunn & Alina Renae - Angel Eyes 18:00 Washed Out - Too Late 17:56 Farius - Coming Up (Hold On) (Dokho Remix) 17:52 Tep No - Say What You Wanted 17:49 Tycho - See (Beacon Remix) 17:49 C H I L L T R A X - The Chillout Channel, Chilltrax 17:45 Holen - Breathe 17:40 Max Cooper - A Model Of Reality (Tor Remix) 17:35 Syml & Zero 7 - Symmetry (Zero 7 Remix) 17:29 Leaving Laurel - There Is Beauty When You Allow Yourself To See 17:29 C H I L L T R A X - Slurry Toh 17:26 Forester - Saint (Shallou Remix) 17:23 Sebastian Davidson - Nomads 17:20 Sum Wave - Milkyway 17:16 Drama - 3am 17:16 C H I L L T R A X - We Are The Music Makers 17:12 Jako Diaz & Leyet - Only You 17:08 Lp Giobbi Feat. Dj Tennis & Joseph Ashworth - All In A Dream 17:05 Feiertag Feat. Tessa Rose Jackson - Follow 17:01 Fakear - Crystal 16:57 Rhye - Summer Days (Roosevelt Remix) 16:57 C H I L L T R A X - Valante Io Toh 16:54 Everything But The Girl - Run A Red Light 16:50 Mango & Cloudcage - More Than This 16:45 Above And Beyond - Sun In Your Eyes (William Orbit Remix) 16:40 Arley & Sirolf - One Day 16:35 Sound Quelle & Tailor - Where We Should Be 16:35 C H I L L T R A X - Escape 2 Music 16:32 Finding Mero - In Loving Memories 16:27 Royksopp - Beautiful Day Without You 16:23 Booka Shade & Satin Jackets - Fusion Royale 16:18 Jones Meadow - Fences 16:14 Leisure - Take You Higher (Serebii & Arjuna Oakes Remix) 16:14 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Dzihan 16:10 Avira & Nourey Feat. Tom Bailey - Favourite Game 16:07 Dreem - Miles Away 16:02 Nils Hoffmann Feat. Julia Church - 9 Days 15:58 Floa & Phonic Youth - Falling Away 15:53 Marsh - Me & You (Joe Miller Remix) 15:53 C H I L L T R A X - Tcc Warm And Tender Ocean 15:49 Monolink - Turning Away (Parra For Cuva Remix) 15:45 London Grammar - Baby It's You 15:40 Zaven - Voliere Amplitude 15:37 53 Thieves - Waves 15:33 Phello - Timelapse 15:33 C H I L L T R A X - Be Svendsen World Comes 15:28 Sao Miguel Feat. Sebastian Reynoso - Hope In Balance (Wisternoff-grant Remix) 15:25 Fløa (Floa) - Pictures Of You 15:21 Kidnap - Start Again (Kidnap Piano Mix) 15:17 Rocket Empire - Astoria 15:13 Kx5 Feat. Hayla - Escape (Chill Mix) 15:09 Odesza Feat. Olafur Arnalds - Light Of Day (Parra For Cuva Remix) 15:09 C H I L L T R A X - Worldschilloutchannnel Orbit 15:05 Giants' Nest - Storm Trap 15:00 Heard Right & Oracle - There For You 14:55 Sumsuch Feat. Matty Eeles - Find Home (Vincenzo Remix) 14:52 Jimpster & Oliver Night - Ascension 14:48 Melosense - Nous 14:44 Goldfrapp - Moon In Your Mouth 14:44 C H I L L T R A X - Parents Magazine Seal 14:39 Eli & Fur - Where I Find My Mind 14:35 Two Lanes - Never Enough 14:31 Sultan Shepard - Sirens 14:26 Double Touch Feat. Reigan - Greatest Day 14:26 C H I L L T R A X - Glitchy Toh 14:22 Feiertag - Didn't Know Why (You Lost Your Soul) 14:18 Cahelo - Bananaquit (Mass Digital Extended Remix) 14:13 Emmit Fenn & Shallou - Hollow 14:09 Evelynka - Letting Go 14:06 Tescana - Benissa 14:05 C H I L L T R A X - Magnifyingglasssogood4u 14:01 Morgin Madison & Ryan Lucian - From The Start (Mm Chill Remix) 13:58 Lliam And Latroit Feat. Brea - Someday (Latroit Edition) 13:53 Billion Watchers - Rainman 13:48 Sg Lewis - Lifetime 13:43 Massive Attack Feat. Hope Sandoval - The Spoils 13:42 C H I L L T R A X - Chill Out Chilltrax 13:37 Ghenwa Nemnom - Story Of A Battle (Chris Zippel Remix) 13:34 Cannons - Loving You 13:30 Sasha - Bygone 13:27 Lar - Collide (Jody Wisternoff & James Grant Remix) 13:27 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Freesound 13:23 Sebastian Davidson Feat. Lewyn - Second Hand Love 13:19 Jan Blomqvist & Malou - Alone 13:15 Odsen - Retrospective 13:12 Vok - Skin 13:11 C H I L L T R A X - Something I Should Tell You 13:08 Satin Jackets Feat. Tailor - Somewhere In Paradise 13:04 Pines Feat. Fractures - Rewrite The Ending 12:59 Royksopp Feat. Pixx - How The Flowers Grow 12:55 Pableno - Heights 12:50 Bob Moses - I Ain't Gonna Be The First To Cry 12:50 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Cymbal Roll Bass 12:46 Kidnap & Pinkpirate - Things Change 12:42 Nightcap - The Two Of Us (We Only Need) 12:38 Rohne - Flicker (Faodail Remix) 12:35 Reel People & Paula - Vibe (Moods Remix) 12:32 Jones Meadow - Expect 12:32 C H I L L T R A X - Ct The Backward Chillout Channel 12:27 Sons Of Maria - It Takes So Long 12:23 Camelphat - Waiting (Eli & Fur's Found Version) 12:20 Lp Giobbi Feat. Caroline Byrne - Another Life 12:16 Tomb - Unbound 12:12 Alex Hook Feat. Rene - You Showed Me 12:12 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Moon Boots 12:09 Kaskade With Project 46 - Chains Chilled 12:05 Aftruu - Falling Asleep 12:01 Andrew Nagy & Joel Winterflood - Little To None 11:58 Everything But The Girl - Forever 11:52 Groove Armada - At The River 11:52 C H I L L T R A X - Retsyn 11:47 Max Cooper - A Model Of Reality (Tor Remix) 11:42 Nicolas Godin Feat. Cola Boyy - The Foundation 11:38 Arto - Now You're Gone 11:35 Liz Cass - Blue 11:30 R Plus & Faithless Feat. Amelia Fox - It's Enough (The Last High) 11:30 C H I L L T R A X - Escape The Noise 11:25 Alison Goldfrapp - The Beat Divine 11:22 Chris Malinchak - Happiness (Eternal Moment Mix) 11:17 Blank & Jones - Floatation 11:13 Above & Beyond & Marty Longstaff - Gratitude (Aname Pm Mix) 11:08 Dj San & Sebastian Moore - In Your Eyes 11:07 C H I L L T R A X - Comes To Chill Out 11:04 Shingo Nakamura - Falling Off 10:59 Two Lanes - Searching (Ct Fixup Mix) 10:56 Embrz Feat. Abroad - Rise 10:52 Passenger 10 - Voices In Her Head 10:49 Dreem - Miles Away 10:45 Autograf - Sleepless In Nyc (Extended Mix) 10:44 C H I L L T R A X - Take Me Away! 10:41 Jako Diaz & Leyet - Only You 10:38 Beacon - Pay My Debts 10:33 Emi Ca - Just Breathe 10:29 Catz 'n Dogz Feat. Jaw - Time 10:29 C H I L L T R A X - Slurry Toh 10:25 Sebastian Davidson - Nomads 10:22 Finding Mero - In Loving Memories 10:18 Farius - A Big Life (Sound Quelle Remix) 10:14 Wassu & Mimi Page - Within Me 10:09 Valante - Eio 10:09 C H I L L T R A X - Jimpster 1 10:04 Elderbrook - Wasted On You 10:00 Kidnap Feat. Leo Stannard - Moments (Ben Bohmer Nils Hoffmann Remix) 09:57 Dex 1200 - Ongea Nami 09:53 Attom & Kwesi - Rogue 09:49 Zero 7 - In The Waiting Line 09:48 C H I L L T R A X - Twcc High Standard Of Quality 09:45 Holen - Not Too Late 09:41 Alampa - Playoff 09:38 Kaskade - Where Did You Go 09:32 Leaving Laurel - There Is Beauty When You Allow Yourself To See 09:32 C H I L L T R A X - Valante Io Toh 09:27 Sons Of Maria - Are You 09:22 Booka Shade & Satin Jackets - Fusion Royale 09:18 Heard Right & Fløa - Enough 09:14 Hoki - Memories Of Love (Dsf Remix) 09:14 C H I L L T R A X - Cleanliness Don't You Agree 09:11 Jones Meadow & Clara Mendes - Em Baixo 09:07 Lipless & Blue Noir - Alone 09:04 London Grammar - How Does It Feel 08:59 Volen Sentir & Makebo - Into The Stars 08:53 Jody Wisternoff Feat. Sian Evans - The Bridge 08:53 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Dzihan 08:48 Steven Weston Feat. Tae - Same Dream 08:43 Mango - Skyline 08:39 Sum Wave - Evening Mood 08:34 Eli & Fur - Better In The Dark 08:30 Chris Malinchak, Kiesza, Malin - Tree 08:29 C H I L L T R A X - Chilltrax - Chill Out Piano 08:26 Flexible Fire - Amatista 08:22 Gareth Emery - St Mary's 08:19 Fløa (Floa) - Pictures Of You 08:15 Eric Hilton Feat. Brian Jackson - Something For Byrd 08:09 Pilots Of Peace - Fallin 08:09 C H I L L T R A X - Glitchy Toh 08:05 Circle Sky - Love Hertz 08:02 Chill Cole - Liquid Life 07:56 Shingo Nakamura - Come Closer 07:53 George Fitzgerald & Syml - Mother 07:49 Morcheeba - It's Summertime 07:49 C H I L L T R A X - We Are The Music Makers 07:44 Arley & Sirolf - One Day 07:39 Washed Out - Time To Walk Away 07:35 Palladian - Zagara 07:31 Flume Feat. Emma Louise - Hollow (Logic1000 Remix) 07:26 Northern Form - Mend 07:26 C H I L L T R A X - Organ The Chillout Channel 07:21 Bonsaye - Viaje 07:17 Feiertag - Didn't Know Why (You Lost Your Soul) 07:14 Cannons - Footsteps In The Dark 07:09 Il:lo - Cynnes 07:03 Mass Digital - Little Things 06:59 Che Jose Feat. Jodie Knight - Freedom (Mass Digital Remix Edit) 06:59 C H I L L T R A X - Escape 2 Music 06:55 Melosense - Story To Remember 06:51 Kx5 & Sofi Tukker - Sacrifice (St Mix) 06:46 Sg Lewis Feat. Lucky Daye - Feed The Fire (Kassian Remix) 06:41 Darius Feat. Benny Sings - Rise (Darius Remix) 06:37 Cahelo - Bananaquit (Mass Digital Extended Remix) 06:32 Camelphat & Elderbrook - Cola (Simon Mills Full Sugar Mix) 06:32 C H I L L T R A X - Trans Europe Vocoder 06:27 Nicholas Gunn & Alina Renae - Angel Eyes 06:24 Emmit Fenn - --amman 06:20 Giants' Nest - Heart Void 06:17 Blonde Maze - Something Familiar 06:17 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Freesound 06:13 Jan Blomqvist & Malou - Alone 06:08 Two Lanes - Movement 06:04 Sons Of Maria - Always 05:59 Cinnamon Chasers - Surviving The Fire 05:55 Arto - Para Mi 05:55 C H I L L T R A X - Cool Refreshed Smooth As Can Be 05:51 Xixi Feat. Kwesi - Close To U 05:46 Mishegas - Temporary Love (Il:lo Remix) 05:43 Farius - Coming Up (Hold On) (Dokho Remix) 05:38 Royksopp Feat. Astrid S - Just Wanted To Know 05:33 Rufus Du Sol - Like An Animal (Trinidad Remix) 05:33 C H I L L T R A X - Backward Rvb Where World Comes 05:29 Woven - Brushes 05:24 Heard Right & Oracle - There For You 05:21 Eli & Fur - Wild Skies 05:18 Lar - Collide (Jody Wisternoff & James Grant Remix) 05:18 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Cymbal Roll Bass 05:14 Alampa - The One 05:11 Lp Giobbi Feat. Caroline Byrne - Another Life 05:07 Holen - Breathe 05:03 Nicolas Godin - The Border 05:03 C H I L L T R A X - Magnifyingglasssogood4u 04:59 Satin Jackets Feat. Tailor - Somewhere In Paradise 04:54 Royksopp & Susanne Sundfor - Oh, Lover (Nto Remix) 04:49 Shallou - Fading 04:45 Rocket Empire - Astoria 04:41 Way Out West Feat. Hendrik Burkhard - We Move In The Dark (Sunday Maybe Mix) 04:41 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Moon Boots 04:37 Vandelux - All I've Ever Known 04:34 Tep No - Deep Sin 04:31 Aether - Jupiter & Saturn 04:27 Cannons - Loving You 04:24 Khotin & Tess Roby - Fountain, Growth 04:23 C H I L L T R A X - Street Life Worlds Cc 04:20 Melosense - Nous 04:15 Circle Sky - Your Name 04:10 Alison Goldfrapp - The Beat Divine 04:07 Flexible Fire - Marea Turquesa 04:04 Tennyson - Iron 04:04 C H I L L T R A X - Slurry Toh 04:00 Catching Flies - Daymarks 03:57 Aftruu - Falling Asleep 03:53 Olan - Wake And Return (Little Dragon Remix) 03:49 Floa & Phonic Youth - Falling Away 03:45 Childish Gambino - Feels Like Summer 03:44 C H I L L T R A X - Tcc Warm And Tender Ocean 03:40 Reel People & Muhsinah - Something New (Kraak & Smaak Remix) 03:35 Roma Moss & Holy - Too Late 03:31 Duckmaw - Distant Worlds 03:26 Vintage And Morelli Feat. Arielle Maren - The Light (Flexible Fire Remix) 03:22 Elderbrook - The End 03:22 C H I L L T R A X - E-chilled-music 03:17 Vincenzo - You Knew 03:13 Sebastian Davidson - Nomads 03:09 Sons Of Maria - It Takes So Long 03:04 Boehm - Who You Are 02:59 Nicholas Gunn Feat. Chris Howard - Thought Of You 02:54 Deep Lo - Lost In You (Soire Remix) 02:54 C H I L L T R A X - Take Me Away! 02:49 Eli & Fur - Where I Find My Mind 02:46 Feiertag Feat. Tessa Rose Jackson, Oli Hannaford - Yearn 02:41 Fakear - Crystal 02:38 Lost In Pacific & Hanging Valleys - Escape 02:33 Cinnamon Chasers - Great Escape 02:33 C H I L L T R A X - The Chillout Channel Redux 02:30 Sum Wave - Milkyway 02:25 Two Lanes - Searching (Ct Fixup Mix) 02:21 Monkey Safari - Temple 02:18 Finding Mero - In Loving Memories 02:18 C H I L L T R A X - Valante Io Toh 02:14 Steven Weston Feat. Lapsley - Like I Used To 02:09 Booka Shade & Satin Jackets - Fusion Royale 02:05 Il:lo - Ink 02:02 Ferr By Ferry Corsten And Youth Novels - Hands 02:02 C H I L L T R A X - Something I Should Tell You 01:58 Everything But The Girl - Forever 01:54 Giants' Nest - Crema 01:51 Rezident - Wellenlainge 01:46 Evren Furtuna - Enceladus 01:46 C H I L L T R A X - Toh Dzihan 01:42 Monolink - Turning Away (Parra For Cuva Remix) 01:38 Leisure Feat. Muroki - Summer Season 01:35 Ran The Man - Swimmingpool 01:32 Jones Meadow & Clara Mendes - Em Baixo 01:28 Odesza Feat. Olafur Arnalds - Light Of Day (Parra For Cuva Remix) 01:28 C H I L L T R A X - Escape The Noise 01:24 Flexible Fire - Amatista 01:19 The Knocks Feat. Muna - Bodies (Tycho Remix) 01:16 Fløa (Floa) - Pictures Of You 01:13 Rocket Empire - Lima 01:10 Baynk Feat. Drama - 1 Chance 01:10 C H I L L T R A X - Glitchy Toh 01:06 Twoworldsapart & Panuma & Nina Carr - Slippin' 01:01 Leaving Laurel - There Is Beauty When You Allow Yourself To See 00:56 Sound Quelle Feat. Daniel Robinson - Tempest 00:53 Alampa - Playoff 00:48 Groove Armada - At The River 00:48 C H I L L T R A X - Parents Magazine Seal 00:43 Morgin Madison & Ryan Lucian - From The Start (Mm Chill Remix) 00:39 Pines - Dawn 00:34 Zaven - Voliere Amplitude 00:30 Gold Lounge - Higher 00:25 Phello - Timelapse 00:25 C H I L L T R A X - World Comes To Chilltrax.com 00:20 Two Lanes - Belong 00:16 Feiertag - Didn't Know Why (You Lost Your Soul) 00:13 French Braids & Matt Hartke - Heaven On Loan 00:08 Billion Watchers - Rainman 00:04 Melosense - Can't Replace You 00:00 Fabio Vee & Mike D' Jais - Consolation 00:00 C H I L L T R A X - Worldschilloutchannnel Orbit

[boom-fanfic-a-latta]

Bestie I started thinking now that I have some more Kirby brainrot in me about what copy abilities Kirby would get if he inhaled the different miraculous users and here's my list/my opinions (idk if this is a PoD thought or anything take it as that if you wish idk if it'd ever come up):

*Ladybug/Misterbug/Scarabella: either Yo-Yo or Beetle (fun fact: apparently entomologists mostly call ladybugs "ladybird beetles" or "lady beetles," 'cus they're actually a type of beetle)

*Cat Noir/Lady Noire/Kitty Noire: Staff or Crash

*Rena Rouge: for some reason Mirror came to mind for me but I'm not sure if that really fits

*Carapace: another one where i'm not that sure, honestly surprised there's no shield or frisbee-themed abilities

*Queen Bee/Vesperia: can Top from the anime count? 'Cus I'm not sure otherwise

*Bunnyx: Parasol or Time Crash (if katfl evolutions count)

*King Monkey: Circus (for some reason I feel like it'd be fitting)

*Ryuko: Sword, Fire, Water, or Tornado (the latter three depends)

*Aspik/Viperion: can I say Time Crash if that counts again? Idk if a musical instrument for a weapon is enough to warrant Mike

*Multimouse/Polymouse: Mini (only one I could think of :'3 can make Kirby mass attack jokes out of this though-)

*Pigella: similar problem to the snake, is Mike reasonable to get from this. Though I think Sleep could be surprisingly fitting (I mean the episode Jubilation had Ladybug and Cat Noir getting snapped out of Gift by a ringing alarm clock so yeah dreams and stuff-)

*Purple Tigress: Fighter

*Pegasus: ESP, maybe (because teleportation)

*Minotaurox: Hammer or

*Miss Hound: Ball or Animal

*Rooster Bold: Copy (otherwise, maybe Mix if we can break the rules of that)

*Caprikid: Artist

Nice

[borderline-reorder]

vent trigger warning for various things kind of a diary entry

I am really struggling. It’s been consistently downhill ever since my nieces screamed at me the other week. I’m still not over that. I can barely convince myself to sleep most nights, and usually need to take three or four Ativan to fall asleep and stop panicking.

Fortunately they will not be over this week so I will have some respite from the screaming. Like, I love them and I get that they are just kids, but I can only handle them in very small doses. That’s just how I am with children. Children scare me. A lot. And my nieces, whether they meant to or not, made this home unsafe for me. I am constantly on edge, constantly on the verge of a panic attack. Constantly overwhelmed. I need to move. My mom is my co-signer and she says she will work on it in Wednesday but that isn’t soon enough for me. I need out sooner. I need to be packed and leaving as soon as possible. I need a space that feels safe and like my own.

So, today. I woke up at 4:30am already panicking. I don’t know why. Maybe a dream? Maybe a nightmare? No clue. But it was rough. So I take two ativan (one doesn’t do shit for me and I am talking to my doctor about getting a stronger dose), and make my coffee and go about my morning routine and things seem to stabilize. I was tired and upset because I was up at 4:30 instead of sleeping in, but what can you do. But I read the news and donated to Kamala Harris and that was nice. Read over some nice comments I got on my fanfic and thought maybe my day wouldn’t be so bad.

And then, at 9, I go to make another cup of coffee. I sit down on the couch, set the coffee on the end table, and my cat jumps up and knocks it off, spilling the whole thing and chipping the mug. I feel bad about it but I screamed her name and what the fuck. I could have calmed down from that much. But no. My mom opens the inside stairs door and asks if me everything is okay and I shout at her that I need to move as soon as possible. I slam my door as hard as I can. Callie never acted like this until we moved here.

Callie runs and hides. I have intense intrusive thoughts about kicking her and throwing her against the wall. I cry. I clean up the spill and mop the area. I make a new cup of coffee.

I am over touched and overwhelmed and my other cat starts to climb the cat stairs at the foot of the couch to come calm me down. I shout at her too. She runs away. I hate myself. I move the cat stairs far away. I am still having intrusive thoughts about hurting Callie, so I put away her favorite toys and throw out ones she never used to punish her. To take some form of action in ththe hopes that the thoughts stop. They do not. Callie and Boo are now both hiding.

I put on my osha earphones and turn on some lofi music and listen to it for an hour while drinking coffeee and reading the news. Kamala Harris made a lot of money in under 24 hours. This is good. This uplifts my mood slightly.

It is now 10am. Mom and I go to Burger King to get diet cokes and drop off lemon bars we made. They are very happy about that. Mom does not mention me screaming at her. I do not wear my earphones, but I want to. I want to pretend I am normal so I do not wear them.

I put them back on as soon as we get home. Mass Effect lofi. I reread the comments I got on my fanfic. I receive two letters from my penpal Manuel but I am too sad to read them. I wait. Maybe I will feel better later. I read the news. I might have scrolled tumblr. I am still having intrusive thoughts, so I throw out old clothes in the trash and expired kitchen ingredients. Maybe that will fix it and makI th thoughts go away.

It does not.

Sometime later I give up and lay down for bed without eating breakfast or lunch. I want to sleep until the next day when I hope I will feel better. It was maybe 2pm.

I woke up at 5pm. My depression worsens. Both the cats ar out of hiding. I am still upset. I throw away more shirts. I still have the intrusive thoughts about hurting Callie. They are getting worse as the day goes on. I throw out my kitchen knife to make it stop. It does not.

My best friend is awake so we texted about our days. I relayed much of the above. I put the earphones on and turn on music to drown out the intrusive thoughts. I tell her it would have bbeen better for me to hurt myself than punish Callie by taking away her favorite toys. I still think this. I am considering it deeply.

I listen to lofi on the osha earphones until 7:15 when mom and I go get sodas. I ask her to stop texting me every time zh goes somewhere and tell her I do not care or want to know. I have been having intrusive thoughts about my mom lately. Those will certainly go away when I move. I need to move. Soon. Soon. Soon. I can’t take this.

We order our sodas. My agoraphobia is back so I ask for four. The ladies in the drive through laugh at me. I try not to cry. I am just having a hard time going places on my own. I just wanted enough to last all day tomorrow. I am crying as I write this. It really hurt my feelings. I will get two tomorrow and force myself to drive the next day because I do not want to be laughed at. I can’t handle being laughed at. It’s too much. I want to take the lemon bars back.

We get home. I put my sodas in my fridge and organize them until I feel less like crying. I find more things to throw out. Tea I never drank because I don’t have a real kitchen and it is hard to make tea up here.

I talked to my BFF for a while but she stopped responding. Maybe she went to sleep. I’m not tired yet. I napped and it was a mistake. I just wanted to feel better. I took five more Ativan after she stopped responding in the hopes it would help me sleep. Nothing. I am too keyed up. Too upset. Still crying about being laughed at.

I finally took the earphones off because it is almost 11pm and it is quiet now. But the thoughts are still there.

I want to hurt myself. I had a bad bad bad day. I want to hurt myself. But my arms are covered in tattoos. And it’s not the same on your legs. Not as magical. I have lighters still even though I quit smoking. I could burn myself. But I’ve never been good at that. I could punch my legs until they bruise. That one sounds like a decent alternative and I will give it some thought.

I guess I’m not sleeping any time soon. I guess I will open the fridge and have a Diet Coke since they are my comfort drink and I can pretend I am happy when I am drinking one.

My self harm urges aren’t even real urges more like intrusive thoughts. Maybe I should put the earphones back on.

I guess I’ll go read the news or something now. Find a way to pass the time. Wait to be tired. Wait to be less overwhelmed.