#cat hood makes me so happy. its so nice. cute.

[red-dyed-sarumane]

fuck it recent songs i've been looping bc i can.

nuru's ai wo (teto sv)

daibaku hasin's ookami (rime)

gomennasai ga ienakute's neko mo shakushi mo mizuirazu (rin)

dopam!ne's penumbra (vip/musical isotope series/kafu,sekai,rime,coko,haru)

shimizu kou's olga no juuo (flower)

szri's anaphylaxy (kafu,gekiyaku)

kurosawa madoka's cat hood (kafu)

ren's el violet (sekai)

[astrxealis]

OH MY GODHSHEUWGWIWHWIDBAJDJAAJOQHD SACNDLAPJON SANDLAPHON CATBOY SANDALPHON ...............

catboy!sandalphon is best sandalphon

[youarejesting]

Mad

[MASTER LIST] Beta: @fluffy-fluffu​ Rating: 18+ Pairing: Taehyung x Reader x V Genre: SMUT, mature, angst, fluff, mystery, thriller Words: 4.9k WARNINGS & TRIGGERS: psych ward in a mental asylum from back in the 1920’s, misguided medical practices; Electroshock therapy etc. Multiple personality disorder/alter ego’s/Dissociative Identity Disorder, Sex, Dirty Talk, Masturbation, Fingering, Exhibitionism, Voyuerism, blow jobs, Yandere V. If you squint for a split second there is like a slight hesitation in the reader but they consent. Nurse sleeps with the patient. Sad boy Tae, Tae vs. V, Talks about cum, Restraints, Sedation.

Summary: Taehyung from room 10 on the ward is being haunted by V a mischievous sexual deviant. Taehyung likes puzzles and his friends which includes you. But V likes you, your hair, your face and the warmth between your thighs. It’s a fight between Taehyung and V who will win?

Authors note: This is in no way shape of form a diagnosis of DID or multiple personalities nor is it an accurate depiction of said mental disorders or illnesses. This is purely fictional. If you are triggered by old medical horror please don’t read. If you identify anything you think should be added to the warnings and triggers let me know so I can warn others.

“The patients on this ward are docile, they won’t hurt you” the nurse explained, smiling softly. It was your first day, you were a fresh new nurse and it was safe to say you were a little scared of your new working environment. “The only one we want you to look out for is um, the patient in room number 10” 

“Number 10?” you repeated. 

“Let me introduce you to some of them.” You had already met some, there was a group who thought they were kittens and puppies and it was adorable. “Hyuka, don’t scratch the mattress” the head nurse chided before guiding him to the bathroom. 

You heard a noise from room 10. It  sounded a lot like something fell. You walked over and quickly scanned over his chart. “Patient is manipulative, he can do whatever is needed to get what he wants, compulsive sexual behaviour, the patient has two prominent altering personalities, Taehyung and V. When the patient addresses himself as V it is best to leave.”

You unlocked the door, peering inside you saw him cuddling his pillow in deep slumber. He seemed to have knocked something off from the bedside table in his sleep. You sighed softly before walking over, trying not to wake him while doing so. 

He had a beautiful face. It was honestly making you feel self conscious to be around him, you fought the urge to brush your hand through his soft curls and crouched down to pick the book up off the floor. 

You stayed crouched whilst examining the book. It seemed to be a comic book you concluded, a famous one that you knew of. You moved to put it back to its original place. As you were about to stand you turned to the patient to see his eyes open, staring directly at you. 

“Hello?” He yawned rubbing his eyes “I am Taehyung”

“Hello Taehyung, I was just picking up your book, how are you feeling this morning?”

“I’m tired, who are you?”

“I am the new nurse” you smiled as he sat up rubbing his hand over his arm casually scratching an itch.

“You are new, that’s exciting” he smiled sitting up properly on his hospital bed showing his impeccable manners “What’s your name?”

“My name is Nurse Y/L/N,” you said with a soft smile trying to appear friendly. From the hall you heard the head nurse call out.

“Kim Namjoon, please don’t try to escape this morning. We are about to serve breakfast okay? You know breakfast is important to fuel that big brain of yours, so sit back down while I will get you a book. How does that sound?”

You turned to look at the door which was still a fraction open, when a hand touched your hair.  Your body went stiff, heart racing in fear. You had turned your back on him. One of the most important things to remember on your first day and you had to let him get the upper hand. 

“Your hair is really pretty, I like the colour” he smiled and you turned, giving him a polite and gentle smile. 

“Thank you Taehyung, you are so sweet” you smiled. “Are you hungry? I can bring your breakfast in, if you would like?”

“I have to shower first, I have a schedule; shower, breakfast and then I get to do some activities” he said 

“Nurse y/n?” The head nurse said “is everything okay?”

“Yes of course Taehyung and I are just talking, he is telling me about his schedule” you smiled 

“Well aren’t you nice this morning Taehyung,”

“Hello Taehyung, are you ready for your shower?'' the male nurse appeared at the door smiling. Stepping past you he uncuffed the patient's ankle chain that restrained him to the bed, there was raw skin where the metal dug into his flesh and some blood stains on the corner of the sheet. 

“You must be the new nurse. I am Jihoon, a resident nurse on the ward, if you need any help, or there is something you're not comfortable with you can call me,” he grinned, shaking your hand. You thought you heard Taehyung scoff which made you blink up at him curiously. You shrugged it off thinking maybe it was all in your head. 

“My name is Y/n,” you prompted yourself to move on, “it’s nice to meet you” 

“Nurse Y/n, could you get some spare clothes and bring them back?” Jihoon asked softly, “Tae’s clothes are in the green cube on the shelf.”

You went along the corridor and found the cubed shelves. Each cube seemed to have a coloured basket, the green one had Kim Taehyung written on it. “Hello?” A voice called behind you, you turned to see two young men sitting playing cards at a table. 

“Hello, my name is nurse y/n, What are your names?”

“My name is Hoseok” the man laughed

“And I am Jungkook-ah” the other said sweetly “we are roommates, will you sit with us at lunch?”

“I will have to see if I am allowed. I don’t want to get in trouble,” you grinned before waving and heading back to Taehyung’s room where you heard the sound of banter coming from the bathroom. 

“You don’t want to miss breakfast,” Jihoon said standing in the doorway, keeping a lookout for any sudden movements. “Oh Y/n! Thanks, you can leave the clothes anywhere”

You took it upon yourself to make the bed and tried to disregard the blood and other intimate stains on the white sheets. You looked up and caught sight of Taehyung in the reflection of the mirror, he was watching you. His eyes were not wide with curiosity as you thought it would be, no rather they were hooded with something darker. 

“Nurse Jihoon, I am almost finished with my shower” he moaned, still staring at your reflection, you saw how his arm shook and how his lips fell open in ecstasy. “I just have to finish this, it would be quicker if it wasn’t my own hand for a change”

Once the bed was made you ran off into the hall trying to ignore the sounds and clear the images from your head. 

You helped serve breakfast and smiled sitting with the two young men from earlier. The nurse who showed you around had approved of the two boys, saying they were harmless. She did however have a bit of a laugh, “this one is Hoseok and that one isn’t Jungkook, his name is Jimin, they are roommates one has narcolepsy and the other is a pathological liar”

You sat down, talking with them about their card game and laughed at some of their jokes. Jimin promised you the world and told you sweet nothings. He even proposed to you several times, you concluded he was a shameless flirt. 

“Hey Jiminie?” Taehyung said walking over, and brushing his fingers along Jimin's neck, “you want to play a game of cards?”

“I can't, I have to go to a photoshoot today.” He said before standing up, “I should get ready.”

“What a shame, maybe next time?” He smirked. The boy across the table started to draw frantically. You looked over and saw it was a general shape and the clothes and hair were that of Taehyungs but the face was distorted. You hummed at the boy's work.

“Nurse, the young ones are going to play outside.” The head nurse in charge of this ward announced, eyeing Taehyung carefully. “Would you be so kind as to watch over them? Please make sure they don’t eat anything strange.”

“Of course. I will be back in a little while,” You told the boys, they were so cute, it was like playing make believe but there was no turning it off. They really thought they were cats and dogs and you loved them already despite it only being your first day. You wanted to protect them while they were in this headspace no matter what.

Looking up at the second floor of the hospital you saw Taehyung pressed against the glass looking down at you. He seemed to be angry at the fact that you were playing with the boys. You saw him get dragged away from the glass and you could not help but feel concerned, hoping he hadn’t gotten hurt.

You didn’t see him for the rest of the day he had been confined to his room and when you walked past all you could hear was crying and begging. You went to open the door but Jungkook, the silent patient grabbed your wrist gently. He handed you two sketches one was labeled Taehyung and it was him smiling and looking happy and genuinely adorable. The other was labeled V and it was the distorted picture from the morning. You flicked through the rest of the book and saw the others drawn, they looked a little different from real life but you knew who was who. The five young boys were drawn as cats and dogs making you smile.

The next day started a little differently, your shift started at lunch and you saw Taehyung sitting at the table looking forlorn, he was bandaged and looked weak. “They sedated him yesterday”,one of the nurses gossiped, “apparently he was trying to come onto one of the nurses working yesterday”

“I wish it was me, I would let him do whatever he wants,” Another nurse whispered back, you ignored them as you walked over and smiled “Good afternoon, how are you all feeling today?”

“Nurse y/n! You are here” Namjoon said, “Tell me, do you have any books to read at home?”

“I have a small bookshelf, why?”

“Well, I am bored and I would like some more books to read” He said and you hummed, “How about instead I tell you a story little by little so you have things to think about throughout the day?”

He reluctantly accepted and you started the story. There was a small giggle at one of the jokes made by Taehyung and you smiled, he looked so tired and soft in his little blanket, his wrists and ankles bandaged.

You were there for a while and the group began playing different card games, you had to explain some of the games and they picked up the concept quickly.

Taehyung left after a while, yawning while stating he was too tired to continue playing and the boys waved goodbye to him. 

Jimin who just yesterday was afraid of him, walked him to his room, practically carrying Taehyung on his back while singing that they were soulmates.

It was odd because Taehyung didn’t seem that strange and when he did it wasn’t as extreme as people made it out to be. You had noticed Taehyung was a sweet boy, whilst V was just a little more forward and flirty. 

Sure he still had his tendencies to do inappropriate things but you tried to ignore those moments and be professional at all times. 

The problem was they began haunting you at night and you were finding it hard to keep your fantasies at bay. He was charming, flirty, and pleasing to the eye, could you really be blamed for being attracted to him? 

The first time you met V and you mean really met V was when you were greeting him one morning and he sat there smirking at you. 

“Hey there bad kitty, you want some milk?” He had his hand wrapped around his hard shaft. It was thick and the tip was an angry red, oozing out precum.  “I want to give you all my milk, but you're a bad kitty and won’t take it”

You tried repressing the images from your head, squeezing your thighs together for some sort of friction, nothing has ever aroused you and made you this wet so quickly. Ignoring him as he jerked off on the bed you continued your act of nonchalance at his actions. You picked up his clothes off the floor and placed them in the wash basket. 

You dodged his hand reaching out to grab you and he frowned before going back to his previous task. You cleaned his bedside table, he was becoming very vocal and more profoundly dirty as time went on. He had resorted to explaining everything about what he wanted to do to you in great detail. 

Your underwear was soaked at this point and you were finding it hard to breath. You had to leave right then, you didn't know how long you could remain professional. You moved to pick up the book that had fallen off the bed, losing focus of your distance from the bed. You were briskly reminded when he took a firm grip of your hair. 

Fuck. 

You cursed at yourself, you made a huge mistake letting your guard down. Stupid stupid stupid. He pulled you up by your hair. “Open your mouth.” He growled as he came on your face. You watched him as his face contorted he growled and came hard as you kept your mouth firmly shut. When he finally finished he let go of your hair. 

“You wasted my milk bad kitty” he huffed watching you clean your face in the sink before you promptly rushed out of his room. 

Taehyung sat confused after breakfast. He took a puzzle and started working, “You okay Tae?”

“Oh hey, yeah I am just working on this puzzle, I am just a little confused” he smiled as the two of you sat and started working on the puzzle. It was a basket of kittens. 

“This one looks like you” he laughed “you are a kitty”

The words and context were so innocent but you couldn’t help but remember what happened that morning and you glanced at the young man from the corner of your eye. 

“What did he do?” Taehyung asked

“It was nothing you should be worried about” you smiled patting his head. “We should only worry about finishing this puzzle”

The night shift was different, you ate dinner with the residence and you all sat and watched a movie afterwards. It was a general audience movie with nothing bad in it. 

Taehyung leant his head on your shoulder as everyone else including the other nurses sat watching the movie as well. The male nurse was sitting with the five young boys. They laid their heads in his laps and he gave them pets on their backs, trying to give all of them equal attention, otherwise one would whine and rub their heads into his arms. 

The female nurse sat with Namjoon painstakingly discussing the movie instead of actually watching it. You and Taehyung were wrapped up in his blanket and you felt his hand start slithering down towards one of your thighs rubbing it tenderly. You glanced at him to see him smirking at you, “You’re such a bad kitty aren’t you?” 

His hand slipped under your dress and into your underwear. His finger grazed your clit gently making you shift in your seat. Taehyung snickered as you bit back a moan, he moved inconspicuously a little closer and whispered in your ear. His voice was deep and barely audible, his breath brushing the shell of your ear.

“You are a bad kitty aren’t you?” He pressed his nose against your neck and inhaled deeply, “Bad kitty smells nice”

Your mouth fell open, a silent gasp escaping as he pushed a single digit inside of you, “Taehyung, stop” You warned him and he chuckled darkly.

“I am not Taehyung, I am V” He took your free hand under the blanket and brushed it against his dick, letting out a small satisfied moan. He tried to pry your fingers open but you refused, he growled lowly and pushed another digit inside you. Whilst you were distracted he slid himself into your closed fist letting it mould around his shaft.

Unintentionally your fingers clenched around his boner as he gently guided your hand along his length back and forth. You kept your mouth firmly shut but it didn’t seem to stop the feelings from building, you were panting softly, the wet sounds coming from between your legs becoming more audible to you and you sighed in relief when you sawa loud action scene was underway in the movie. 

He pumped his fingers and moved your hand faster as his breathing became sporadic. V turned to you, biting your shoulder hard and coming into your hand. Without hesitation V pressed his thumb against your clit as he pumped his finger into you harder and you came, your body almost doubling over in pleasure.

“You are a bad kitty” He grinned, pushing your hand to your mouth “Lick your milk.”

“No,” You muttered seemingly uninterested and his smile disappeared.

“Bad, bad kitty” He watched as you got up and left.

As the days passed you understood more and more the difference between Taehyung and his counterpart V. You loved Taehyung, he was such a sweet boy who could do no wrong, but, you longed for the thrill of V, it took everything in your power to refuse his advances. 

An easy way to establish who you were talking to was their nicknames for you, Taehyung called you a Kitty after that fateful day of doing a puzzle together. Whereas V called you Bad Kitty for reasons unknown.

One day during the night shift you heard Taehyung crying. Stepping into the room you saw how he wiped his eyes quickly, feigning that he was okay. “Hey, Taehyung, tell me what’s wrong?”

“It’s nothing please, you can go?” He sniffled, choosing to ignore his request you got closer and sat on the edge of his bed concerned.

“I am here now, I want to know what has got you so upset?”

He looked up at you innocently. The bedside lamp was his only source of light and it was quite dull. It made the room feel small as the shadows waited on the edge.

“I remember less and less, V is taking over and I can’t remember things, the boys sometimes get really nervous with me, Jungkook’s pictures are horrific.” He sniffed, “I have never been with a lady, let alone kissed someone and he has done such vulgar things”

You leaned over and kissed him before leaning back and smiling softly, “You have kissed a girl now”

He was frozen, fingers slowly pressing to his lips in shock, “Wait, nurse can I um, can you kiss me again a real kiss, I want to know what it feels like” 

You knew you shouldn’t have but you let him. Yet you kissed him and he kissed back, it was soft and timid. He pulled back, “That was amazing, if I was just a normal person. Would there be a chance that you would ever like me, Kitty?”

“I would.” You smiled brushing his hair back and smiling at the innocence in his eyes.

“Would you let me take you out to dinner?” He asked softly, you nodded “Would you let me kiss you and maybe even spend the night together?”

You nodded and he frowned, “I wish I was normal, I just want to be normal” He cried into your shoulder hugging you and as you held him he kissed you softly. You didn’t have the heart to stop him with how gentle and kind he was. He pleaded sadly, “Please, just once, just tonight”

You were helpless to the look in his eyes and you shut his door climbing onto his bed where you kissed him, touching his body as he did the same. The light tinkling of his ankle cuff was the only thing keeping you alert to any possible dangers. But he was gentle. Taehyung wasn’t V.

“Does this feel okay?” He whispered “I am not hurting you?”

Riding him was like a dream, he guided you with his hands on your hips and you felt his heart racing against your hands that were on his chest. Right before he was going to finish, you got off and took him in your mouth, you weren’t going to take any risks without any condoms.

“Yes kitty,” he whispered as he grabbed your head and came. You managed to pull away and he came all over the two of you causing him to frown, “bad kitty you got us all dirty”

Alarm bells rang but he still looked so innocent and carefully wiped your face with a tissue, apologizing the whole time. Taehyung helped you dress and even helped you tie up your hair. “I am really thankful that you helped me experience something, I won’t tell anyone, I don’t want you to lose your job or anything”

“It’s okay, Taehyung, I trust you.” He gave your hand an affectionate squeeze and you slipped out the room before people would start to suspect something.

You and Taehyung spend the next few days bonding, he warns you when he feels himself slipping away and you have enough time to prepare before V emerges. Whilst painting in the garden Taehyung is talking about all the things he loves, his favourite style of music and his favourite colour and the two of you talk about what you would do if you could do anything.

On your way back Taehyung is telling you about a new electrotherapy that has been said to remove alternate persona’s from one's mind. “It is worth a shot don’t you think?”

“It sounds a little scary, what if something goes wrong, what if you die?” you asked

“I would rather die than spend my whole life in this ward trapped in my own body because someone else is taking control of me, making me do things I don’t want to” He exclaimed, laughing almost bitterly.

“Sorry Taehyung, I didn’t know” You whispered “It’s not something I can truly comprehend.”

“That’s right because you are perfect and everything is normal,” He hissed getting aggravated, he was being restrained when he panicked and started apologizing. “Wait I am sorry, I am sorry, please let me go.”

He was taken to his room and your heart felt like it was breaking, he was afraid of himself and he wanted to get better. He was alone, longing for someone to love him for who he was. Could you be that for him perhaps?

After dinner you went to the room to see him, he was hunched over his shoulders shaking as he sniffled, “I’m sorry,” his voice was small. You stepped over and touched his shoulder, his hand came up and squeezed yours. “You should go, I am not the person you should be with”

“I want to stay, I want to be with you. If there was a way, I would love to get married, have a family and live happily ever after.”

His grip tightened and the sniffling turned to laughter, you were pulled on top of him, his grip was harsh, “You want to get married, my bad kitty, you want me to put some babies inside you?”

You were grabbed and one of the male nurses sedated him, you were crying and you left the room, “I just tried to comfort Taehyung, I am fine I was just startled and scared. I will go for a shower and I will head home for the night.”

You came back to work the next day but you didn’t step foot into Taehyung’s room. You spoke over meals with everyone and he was his usual nice and gentle self. He told everyone that he was getting electroshock therapy. He was saying if it all went successful he would be allowed out of the asylum and allowed to live like a normal human again. 

It took three whole weeks before you had willingly stepped into Taehyung's room, it was his first interview about him and his illness they were recording data to compare with afterwards. You walked him to his interview and walked him back, opening his door and stepping inside.

The door shut behind you and you knew he was behind you. The number one rule is don't let the patient block your exit. And here you were stuck in the room blocked in by Taehyung. 

“Hey Taehyung, you want to play another game of cards” you said, watching him look at the door shoulders hunched over. He slowly turned, looking up with a dangerous glint in his eyes. 

“I’m not Taehyung.” he said,his face void of any expression. 

“Who are you, then?”

“You know who I am!” He shouted before reigning himself back in, “I am V, I am the one that scares you bad kitty, that day when they sedated me, I almost had you” 

“You liked what I said though didn’t you, you pressed your thighs together and the sweet scent of arousal filled the room. You want to get fucked and you want it hard” he said, gripping you by the hair and pushing you so your chest is flat against the bed. 

You wanted it, god you wanted it and he knew it, but you would get fired. As if reading your thoughts V softly whispered into your ear, “you can blame me if they come in sweetheart, no one has to know you were willing, just tell me you want it”

“I can’t” you whined into the bed cursing that you couldn’t. 

“You let Taehyung fuck you but not me?” He pressed himself against you letting you feel how hard you made him.

“Because Taehyung was sweet,” and upset. You were trying to comfort him and had forgotten you were at work, but you didn’t say the last bit out loud.

“Listen to me. Taehyung doesn’t control me but I can control him, that was all me, you know it because I called you by my nickname. Didn’t he call you bad kitty that day?”

You looked at him in shock as he continued, all the while lifting your dress and pulling down your soaked underwear, “That’s right it was me all along so what’s the harm if we try it again?”

“Fuck me, please” you moaned throwing caution to the wind, if you lost your job then so be it. 

He pushed himself into you in a single, hard thrust and you felt your walls stretch around him. He felt bigger then Taehyung but that had to be impossible.

Where one was timid and soft, he was rough and ferocious, his hips pistoned in and out as he fucked you hard. He was vocal and unrefined, he didn’t have any other thought except the primal urge to fuck you. The lewd sounds bounced off of the walls as he pounded into you. He thrusted deep, you could feel him deep inside in your inner walls.

You were drooling, biting the blankets on his bed clutching them between your fists trying to muffle the sounds you were making. 

Taehyung had thrust hard one last time before you felt heat spreading inside you and your eyes shot open, “Fuck, Tae what about a condom?”

“You are mine.” he growled, punctuating each of his words with a thrust as he went, leaving you a writhing mess. 

You quickly got dressed and stormed into the staff bathroom and took a shower.

You changed your clothes and hurried home. You spent the night huddled in your blankets crying yourself to sleep. 

You left for a while after that incident, you spent christmas and new years with your family and when you came back you went back to working right away. The shift was awkward as Taehyung kept staring at you, you didn’t know what it meant but you tried to pay it no mind. The end of your first week back was the day Taehyung would undergo Electroshock therapy.

When it came around you walked him to the theatre and stayed in the hall, you didn’t want to witness it but you wanted to be there by him as soon as it was over. What you didn’t expect was the screaming. What felt like after an eternity but was only half an hour later they stepped out wheeling Taehyung on a gurney, he didn’t look so good. 

It took awhile but Taehyung was starting to grow stronger and he would chat and seemed to be getting healthier and there was no sign of V. You were extremely happy and a month later he was reviewed and approved for discharge from the asylum. He was finally moving in with you and you two were going to live together and start a family.

He waved to the boys but they hadn’t stopped crying all morning, they didn’t say a word, only sobbing more when Taehyung hugged them before leaving. “I wish I could take you all with me,” He said, wiping his eyes.

Taehyung moved in and you two started decorating the apartment to make it more homey. You were cooking dinner for him one night, everything was going well so far, it had been two months since his discharge and the two of you were happy.

“We could try for a baby, if you wanted?” Taehyung shuffled his feet looking at the ground. You giggled, grabbing his hand and leading him to the bedroom, he undressed you and laid you on the bed before undressing and settling in between your legs. You hadn’t been intimate since Taehyung had been discharged from the asylum and it was just as amazing as you remembered, slow and sensual just like your first time with Taehyung. 

Taehyung lifted your hands above your head, kissing and licking your breasts. Panting against you when his hands tightened his grip around your wrists. His hips drove deeper inside you, he was soon going faster and harder pounding into you with all his force and you whined in pleasure. “Yes please.”

“Do you like that bad kitty?”

If you enjoyed this story don’t forget to Like | Reblog so others can enjoy it too.

[aceofspadegrass]

Cats Make Great Companions

Character: Last Boss, Cabot

Genre: Fluff. It's just Last Boss being a dork.

1.5k words

Everyone at the beach knew for a fact that the militants weren’t a group to fuck with.

After all, they were in charge of all of the weaponry at the Beach, and unless someone had a death wish (or were simply new to the Beach altogether), nobody messed with them. Some of the militants took pride in the fear they put in others, others a sort of comfort in being the top of the pack.

Others just preferred to feel alive, sword in hand as he sliced down his enemies. The feeling of that sword with him, able to protect him and make him feared and known, it was a wonderful feeling. Before this, he was nothing.

Now he could be everything he wanted to be.

Last Boss was on patrol at the moment, wandering around the sunlit Beach and making sure that nobody was breaking any rules and needing to be disciplined. The rules were simple enough — Do whatever, hand over all cards, and death to the traitors —but people were dumb.

Very, very dumb.

For a world surrounded in life or death situations, people chose instead to ignore it in favour of chasing their own highs, drinking and smoking and partying all day and night. Every night they would be sent away to play games for their lives, and bring back the cards to the leader of this whole place, a man known as Hatter.

Last Boss isn’t exactly that fond of the man’s exuberant personality, but many others were nothing but simps for that man, doing everything that came out of that charismatic mouth.

“ He sounds like he’d make a good partner though, given the right circumstances.” Last Boss mutters into what appeared to be open air, but a faint mew coming from his hood told otherwise. Last Boss nods to himself as a cat pops its furry head out of the hood, peering over Last Boss’ shoulder. Last Boss pets the cat with a finger, the cat purring and nuzzling against the finger. “ Afternoon, Cabot. Ready for patrol?”

Cabot meows once more, and Last Boss continues onwards. It was calming almost to just walk around and not have to do much other than stare at people. A few ignored him, more focused on their own time, and others would glance at him, acknowledging his presence.

Last Boss merely stares back blankly, his tattoos making most everyone at the Beach nervous, like a tiger watching its prey.

He continues to wander, and spots a few Beach members by themselves, talking to each other. They were covered in healing cuts and bruises, Last Boss passing by without a care.

“ That one with the shaggy hair looks like they listen only to country music. Not the good kind either.* He mutters to Cabot, his cat purring against his shoulder. Last Boss doesn’t bother to raise his voice when his trusted companion was right next to him, a furry ear flicking as they continue to walk. “ Did you see the one next to him? The one with the bright pink one piece? Do you think she knows where her eyelids are? There’s a lot of grey above her eyes, and they’re not bruises, definitely. Someone should tell her it smeared. If it smeared.”

Cabot just lets out a short, small meow, Last Boss petting the top of her head as he ends up by the pool. People were outside, either swimming or sunbathing, Last Boss making a quick sweep at the multitude of people. A few were getting it on in the wild, Last Boss pretty numb to the sight after seeing it practically everywhere here. People have no shame, really. Last Boss takes notice of one person underneath an umbrella that looked like she hasn’t showered in ages, but seemed happy enough, talking to another with brightly coloured hair and swimsuit to match. Close friends, most likely.

Cabot meows, Last Boss nodding as if he knew what the cat said. “ I know, right? They should invest in nicer sandals. Who wears high heels like that to the pool? They could slip from the water.” Cabot purrs, Last Boss nodding again. “ Do they wear them to the games? How do they survive? Barefoot? Idiots.” He mutters to Cabot. He could feel people look at him and his cat in confusion, but Last Boss didn’t care if they stared. He can just stare back and they’ll immediately back away. They were terrified of him, and made him feel a bit powerful. It’s nice. Last Boss just continues his round, Cabot chilling in his hood, comfortably vibing.

Last Boss eventually returns to the lobby, making his way back to his room, and passes by someone, who gasps at the sight of Cabot peering out of his hood. “ Can I pet your cat?” The person asks, and Last Boss couldn’t help but stare back at them. Shit, how does one interact with people- The person just looks back, and Last Boss could tell they seemed nervous, but one meow from a curious Cabot snaps them out of the impromptu staring contest, the person looking at the cat in awe. “ You have a cute cat! What’s their name? Can I pet it?” Last Boss just continues to stare, but slowly nods anyways, and Cabot leans over Last Boss’ shoulder as the person reaches up, finger curled to let the cat sniff their finger curiously. After a bit, the cat meows and rubs itself against their finger, the person giggling and petting Cabot. “ Sorry, I just love cats. I haven’t seen a single animal around this place other than at a few games, so I just assumed they all disappeared. You’re pretty lucky, huh?” Last Boss just blinks. Curse his inability to properly interact with people. The other didn’t seem to mind, smiling, putting their hand down. “ Well, thanks for letting me pet them! Bye now!” They wave and scurry away, Last Boss watching them go.

“….. They’re not scared. How strange. It’s nice, I think.” Cabot meows, and casually cleans itself as it slinks back into the safety of the hood. “ Thanks Cabot.”

——————————————————————————————————

The game that night was simple enough, just a three of spades, something that Last Boss and the others in that certain group cleared easily. Last Boss just hangs back and watches as others hug and cheer that they got to live another three days, Last Boss not really caring. Cabot pops out of his hood and purrs, completely okay. Like hell was Last Boss letting his cat get hurt. He couldn’t say the same about others, one of them beaten up rather good due to a lack of mind to clear it fast enough. Their entire appearance was battered anyways, probably from surviving on his own for who knew how long.

“See Cabot? That’s what happens if you can’t adapt. Luckily for the both of us, we can do better.” Last Boss mutters as he walks away and heads back to the car. Cabot purrs and gently paws at the back of his head, which kind of tickled to be honest, Last Boss gently knocking the little paws off to settle in the hood. He sits in the car, already full of other militants and two randoms. He doesn’t know any of these people, so he actively just ignores them as Cabot hops out and rests on his lap, purring up a storm.

“ Did you have to bring the cat along?” One of them asks Last Boss, and they nudge him, Last Boss looking at them with wide eyes as an intimidation factor. They weren’t phased, just scowling at him. “ You could’ve lost that thing in the game, you know. How is it still here anyways?” They ask. Last Boss just slowly blinks, and pets Cabot, who does a stretch, wiggling in that good kind of wiggle.

“ Cabot is a good companion.” “ But you don’t need to carry it everywhere like it’s a toy.” “ Cabot is very comfortable in my hood. It’s secure there.” They just look at the cat, Cabot rubbing against Last Boss happily, and when the cat looks back at them with those feline eyes, they scoff and turn away to stare out the window instead as the car jerks, beginning to drive back to the Beach. Cabot attempts to seek attention from this person, but when they try to push the cat away more roughly than need be, Cabot hisses and swats at their hand, leaving a scratch.

“ Ow! What the fuck! Your stupid cat scratched me!” They yelp, another person snickering quietly. They glare at the person laughing, who just starts making fun of them for getting so riled up over a cat of all things. Last Boss just blinks, then looks to Cabot. He scoops the cat up, whispering. “ Looks like someone’s never made a mud pie to show their parents before.” He says, Cabot just purring some more. “ Don’t worry, you’re valid.” Cabot meows and gets comfortable again as Last Boss sets the cat back on his lap, where he remains the rest of the way back. It was nice, just being here with his cat.

The militants weren’t people to mess with, and that included Cabot. Last Boss couldn’t ask for a better companion.

[no-droids]

The Sun on Both Sides

Summary: Cassian Andor is your very close companion.  He says best friend, you say pain in your ass—neither one of you are entirely wrong.  But then one night you smoke some unfamiliar spice with him, and everything you once thought you knew goes sideways.

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Cassian Andor/fem!Reader

Word Count: 11.2K

Warnings: SMUT, sex pollen (therefore DUB-CON by default), recreational drug use, best friends to lovers, mutual pining, dirty talk, oral sex (both male and female receiving), penetrative sex, me just making so much shit up honestly

A/N: All phrases in Festan are taken from other Star Wars conlangs.  I don’t even know if that’s the name of the language people from Fest speak tbh.  Probably not.  None of this is real.  Anyways this is Cassian as a young rebel pilot long before the events of Rogue One.  This oneshot will likely be deemed obsolete by Cassian’s new Disney+ show but whoooooooops~

—knock knock knock knock knock—

You know that knock.  It’s too quick, too rapid and annoying to be anyone else.

“I’m sleeping,” you huff with your mouth full, sitting on top of your mattress in a hoodie and sweatpants, legs crossed.

“I have gifts,” Cassian’s muffled voice asserts from the other side of the door.

“I don’t care,” you return, swallowing and shoveling more slop together with your tiny little biodegradable spork.  “S’the middle of the night.”

—knock knock knock knock knock—

“Stop it.”

“Knock knock,” he beckons vocally, as if you didn’t hear it the first ten times.  “Come, open the door.  Please—I will get into trouble.”

It’s exhausting being Cassian’s friend.  Truly exhausting.  It doesn’t matter what Maker-forsaken time it is, as soon as he comes back to base from patrols, he’s at your door.  You don’t know why he chose you as his sole victim to personally inflict this torture upon, but regardless of reason, he’s called you his close friend ever since you first offered to help the lanky, dark-haired six year old with his Basic and his best friend ever since your junior year of flight training.  Apparently with the promotion came the lingering, severe misfortune of his present company, almost always.

“Can I put in for a transfer?”  He also technically outranks you.

“Open the door and we will talk,” Cassian bargains.  Bantha shit, you and him both know it.  He’ll rip the papers in half before you can even finish filling them out.

You let out a dramatic groan just loud enough for him to hear, dragging yourself off the bed and padding over to the door.  “If I accept your gift, will you leave?”

“Maybe.”  No.

“If I accept your gift and trade it for the rest of this, uh,” you look at the MRE packet in your hands, “rice and shredded tauntaun meat in glockaw sauce, will you leave?”

“Maybe.”  No.

“Good call, not as great as it sounds.  What if I—”

He says your name impatiently, accented and sharp.  You roll your eyes as his knuckles rap on the door once more.  “Quickly, quickly—before someone sees.”

“It’s the residential quarters and it’s two in the fucking morning, Cass, nobody’s going t—”

He cuts you off once more.  “Open the door and I will submit for your transfer work, yes?”

You throw your spork prong-down into the beige pouch in your hands and pop your hip, narrowing your eyebrows at the thick slab of metal separating the two of you skeptically.  “No, you won’t.”

“No, I will not,” the voice behind it concedes immediately.  “But for you, I will pretend.”

As soon as you the door slides open and disappears up into the ceiling with a quiet shhhft sound, his dark silhouette quickly slips past you and sneaks into your room, immediately bouncing his bony little butt down on top of your sizable but thin box-spring mattress without a word.  You press the button to close the door behind him with a long, drawn out sigh, turning around and resting your back against the wall panel.

Cassian meets your tired, expectant gaze head-on and wide awake, perched on your bed and huddled around something hidden in his thick jacket.  “First.  You cannot tell anyone.  Understand?”

You raise an eyebrow at him, unimpressed.  “Are we children, Cass?”

“Secondly.”  He blinks up at you.  Maker, his eyes are so… wide.  Dark and warm and bright, framed with thick, long lashes.  “If you do not want it, just say.  Okay?”

Your expression suddenly narrows.  This is new.  It’s… still bantha shit, but it’s… new.  New bantha shit.

“Because the word ‘no’ holds so much meaning for you,” you tilt your head to gesture at the door to your right, “clearly.”

“Come.  Sit here,” he ignores you, patting the space next to him as if that isn’t your own fucking bed he’s inviting you to join him on.  “We will look together.”

“I will literally murder you,” you tell him genuinely, though you push off the wall to move toward him all the same.  “If that’s not a cute little mini-lothcat in your arms you got me for my birthday, Andor, I will literally murder you.”

“Today is your birthday?”  He glances up at you in surprise just as you’re lowering yourself down onto the mattress next to him.

“Two weeks ago, but you were off-base.”  You dig around inside the pouch for your handy little spork, not looking at him.  “Quit avoiding the subject, my death threat still stands.  Where’s my cat, asshole?  Who do I have to tolerate in my bed this late at night to push that kind of paperwor—oof—”

The second you catch the hard little end piece of it between your fingers is the second he reaches around you and pulls you into a tight, one-armed hug.  You fumble with the packet of food as you’re abruptly jerked forward, trying not to let it get squished it between you.

Stars, he smells good.  His parka smells just like him, the fur lining its hood so warm and fluffy and soft as it tickles your nose.  It’s still slightly damp from the wet sleet outside, but it smells so good.  The smallest undercurrent of clove and spice hidden beneath the sharp, clean scent of fresh snow.

“Happy Year-Over, caraya,” Cassian says next to your ear, quiet and fond.  “I know it is late, but I have your gift now.”

“‘Caraya’ better be Festan for ‘here’s your cute little lothcat, birthday girl’,” you warn him, moving to rest your chin on top of his padded shoulder and trying not to sound as breathless or affected by his sweet talking as you feel.  He’s never called you that before.  Caraya.  What does it mean?

It’s… it’s bantha shit, you remind yourself, trying not to close your eyes or lean into his half-embrace.  It’s all bantha shit.

“No,” Cassian acknowledges with a small head tilt, pulling his shoulder back but still keeping his long arm wrapped tight around you.  “No.  Not a… a cat, but…”  He slowly opens his other hand between the two of you, finally showing you.

You blink down at the thing in his palm, cradled carefully in thick gloves from the sub-zero temperatures outside.  It’s.  No, he’s right, it’s not a cat.  It’s a… a stick.  Reddish-pink, ground up plant matter wrapped in a semi-transparent binding.  Rolled up in a nice, even cylinder, a filter secured around one of its ends.

Spice.  Hand-rolled.  Expensive.  Probably swiped off a supply raid, whether by Cassian himself or another rebel fighter he bought it off of.  Ludicrous he got his hands on it, much less brought it on base.  Here, to your fucking quarters.

“I was wrong,” you eventually say, taking the joint from his open palm and holding it up to examine its strange color in the dim light.  “You don’t think we’re children.  You think we’re teenagers.”

“I think we are adults,” he corrects, swiping the MRE from your other hand, “with a reason to celebrate.”  He releases you and takes his arm back, sitting on your bed and digging two fingers around in your half-finished packet for your spork.

“You’re a bold pilot, Cass,” you tell him, studying the spice.  You’ve never seen any strain even similar to this before.  “It was one thing to do this during flight training, but now?  What happens if we have a piss test tomorrow?  Or, well—today, actually?”

“Different kind from before.”  He doesn’t sound bothered by the thought, though his mouth is currently full of tauntaun and rice in glockaw sauce.  “Only five hours high, not detectable after.  Piss tests are expensive, the rebellion has no money.”

“X-wings are expensive, too,” you counter, turning to look at him.  “You crash one of ‘em ‘cause you smoked this shit and your ass will be dead before you can even survive.”

“You hurt me.”  He uses the utensil to dig around the bottom corners of the packet for more slop, not looking hurt in the least.  “Also—you were right.  This one is… horrible.”

“Not to mention I have a oh-nine-hundred call.”  You both watch each other with matching looks of distaste as he continues to eat your food, clearly neither one of you enjoying it.  “You’re giving me barely two hours to come down before I got orange jumpsuits crawling all over me.”

“You did not hear?”  Cassian swallows.  “Reassigned Dreis during debriefing.  I will be leading red squadron tomorrow.  Or, today.”

You blink at him.  “You’re kidding.”

“No,” he shakes his head exactly once, throwing the spork into the empty packet and flattening it.  “No, I would not do that to you.”

“Course not,” you agree diplomatically.  “You’d just barge into my room at two in the morning, eat my food, offer me drugs, and then tell me I’ll be taking orders from you tomorrow.”

”Today,” he corrects.  “But I could not get our call changed, and for that I am sorry.”  He lifts an eyebrow at you, quirking the side of his mouth up and pushing the empty MRE pouch into your hands to throw away.  “But only for that.  Happy birthday?”

“We’re going to lose this war,” you tell him honestly, sliding off your mattress with a sigh to trash it.  “We’re all going to die horribly, and painfully.  The Rebellion is fucking doomed.  You and I will be but a mere footnote in the Empire’s endless reign of terror, you realize.  A footnote.  Our names at the very, very bottom of the page, in tiny little six point font, and it’ll link to a one sentence obituary for the both of us.  Died horribly and in pain.  Did you bring a lighter?”

“Here,” Cassian shifts to one buttcheek and pulls an arc lighter from his back pocket, offering it to you when you come back.  “Okay?  You will start it then?  Birthday girl.”

“You said five hours for one person, right?  So that’s two and a half each if we split it,” you reason with a shrug, putting the filter to your lips and talking through the side of your mouth.  “Two o’clock right now, nine-hundred call.  At least four hours to come down, and thirty minutes to shower if we’re both lucky.”

“We will be fine.”  He waves your careful calculations away with his hand as you flick the lighter.  “Because we are lucky feetnotes, yes?”

***

You’re not fine.

It’s fucking boiling in here.  Maker, you’re on fucking Hoth; why the fuck are you boiling?  It’s never even been warm in your quarters before, much less this hot.  You feel like you’re sweating buckets through your hoodie, your hair sticking to your neck in thin little curls.

And… and Cassian.

He’s sitting so unbelievably straight on the bed across from you, parka and gloves long abandoned on the floor.  His dark eyes flick over to you occasionally, though it looks like he’s trying really hard not to move a single muscle other than that.  His hands are clamped tightly between his thighs and he just… holds there.  A compact, rigid statue perched upright on the mattress, looking far too still and tense to fit the comfort of his surroundings.

“Are you okay?”  You ask him, blinking at how hoarse your voice comes out sounding.  Holy fuck, your mouth feels like a desert.  

Cassian stares at you, and for some reason, his large, expressive eyes seem even wider now.  They’re glassy and a bit red, but also so big and lovely and framed with long, dark lashes.

“This is not.”  His accent sounds thicker, words coming out deeper in his throat.  It settles down inside you just right and you feel a spark of heat at the base of your spine.  He blinks twice.  “This is not how it usually feels.”

“Should we stop?”  You look down at the half-finished joint in your hand, tilting your head thoughtfully as you consider the drug pulsing through your veins.  “It’s… it’s different, but I think it feels good.”

“Yes—I…”  He closes his eyes.  “Th-that is the problem, I think.”

He shifts a bit on the mattress and bites down on his bottom lip, and you must look so fucking dumb as you stare at him with your jaw slack, watching his lithe body stretch and handle the spice.  He’s fucking gorgeous.  Stars, you always thought he was gorgeous, but this is something else.  He flutters his eyes open to look at you through his lashes, and—

—oh.  Oh.  You see now.  You see what he meant.  Warmth pools deep down in your tummy as he looks at you with impossibly dark eyes, slowly drags his glassy gaze down your body.  Fuck, you’re getting turned on.  You go red and blink softly at him while he stares at you, trying to control your breathing.

“You need to—” your voice jumps, trying to remember the right cadence.  How do you speak to him normally?  “You can… take—take my pillow, if you want.  Lay down.  You’re too tall, your eyes are too big.  Look like a… like a Kaminoan.  Heal any—heal any clones recently?”

Bad joke.  Maker, he’s so beautiful.  Rich, dark features taking you in, blinking slowly at you and clearly not hearing a single word you said.

You shift your weight and throw him the cushion you’re partially sitting on without waiting for an answer.  You both need to calm the fuck down.  Hopefully the pillow will help.  Even if it’s squished and warm from your butt.  “It’s warm ‘cause I was sitting on it, m’sorry.  Fuck, it’s warm in here.  Do you think it’s warm in here?”

It’s like he still doesn’t hear you.  Cassian just takes your flattened pillow in his lap and looks at it for way too long, slowly rubs the fabric on the corner between his fingers and examines it, like if he tries hard enough he’ll be able to see through it.

“Cass,” you eventually call his name in reminder.  “Lay down, put that under your head—”

“Do you feel turned on?”  He asks quite suddenly, whipping his head to the side to look at you.  You almost drop the spice.

“No,” you say immediately, acting on impulse alone and trying to rearrange your face into something… something negative.  Something just generally negative, because you can’t even think of a negative emotion specific enough with the way your heart is pounding at the thought of something like this actually happening right now.  Holy fuck, you’re sweating.  What the fuck is in this shit?  “No, of course not.”

“Of course not,” he nods, turning back to look at your pillow.  “Me too.  Not.”  He shakes his head.  “Neither.  Either?”

“Lay down,” you tell him once more, desperately needing something else to do now, something to distract yourself from the way your lower muscles are starting to cramp up with heat and arousal.  “I’ll get us some water.  We need water.”

You’re off the bed and setting the smoldering spice on the small metal counter without another word, grabbing two empty cups and beginning to fill them up in the tiny little sink with your back to him. 

Stars, he was right.  It’s not supposed to feel like this.  It feels… it feels like everything is burning inside you, but such a good burn.  Like your mind is being seduced by your own body right now instead of the other way around, and the paradoxical sensation is manifesting itself in an unprecedentedly strong urge to jump your best friend’s bones.  The urge has always been there, granted, but it’s never been this shameless before.  Never arced and pulsed so brilliantly in your veins before, never been steadily fed by such a tempting outside source.  Not the drugs—but him.  The tangible fuck-me vibes Cassian is radiating towards you right now, staring at your back with those big, gorgeous brown eyes of his, silent and unmoving behind you as he watches you from your bed.  He’s never done anything to encourage your desire for him like this before.  He’s never wanted anything more than just platonic companionship and playful banter in the midst of war zones from you, and yet you can feel the heat burning from him too, feel it start to intensify your own high.

It’s bantha shit, you have to realize.  This whole Maker-forsaken situation—it’s forced; none of it’s real.  Cassian is your best friend, and he’s only looking at you like this because spice is chemically altering his hormones right now.  You can feel it doing the same to you, just steadily stirring deep in your floor muscles and amplifying your baser desires, but you need to snap yourself the fuck out of it and be the levelheaded one here.  Despite the arousal burning hot in your tummy, at least you know your thoughts are still fundamentally sound—in contrast, you have no fucking clue what’s going on in that hard head of his right now.  At least one of you needs to buck up, handle your drugs, and be the adult before things get out of hand.  If it falls to you, then so be it.

You focus on your breathing and do as much as you can to mentally will the tingling sensation down deep.  Taking a second to put a comfortable expression on, you finally turn around and start walking back to him.

When you raise your head and make eye contact with Cassian again though, the look in his eyes almost immediately threatens to undo everything you just decided.  Fuck, he looks like he just had an internal pep talk of his own, but in the entirely wrong direction you went.  He’s a bit more relaxed now, same as you, but his gaze is now searing hot on your body, tangible enough to stop you dead in your tracks in front of him.  It burns through you, and you literally feel the sweat drip down your back as a shiver rolls down your spine.

No.  Hold strong.  Maker, irresponsibility has always been appealing but never so fucking seductive as this is, has it?  Taking such a gorgeous fucking form.  You take a few more steps forward, quickly trying to gather composure.

“Should we stop?”  You ask him once more and stars, you were aiming for calmer and gentler and with more lung support—not this breathless scrape of a sound that feels like sandpaper in your throat.  He hasn’t said a fucking word and your resolve is already wavering.  You try not to make eye contact as you carefully hand him one of the cups.  “We’re only twenty minutes in, barely halfway through it.  We can stop and coast, it’s not a big deal.”

Cassian takes the water from your outstretched hand, letting the tips of his fingers brush lightly across yours in the process.  Your heart skips in your chest.  “Do you want to stop?”

You absolutely should fucking stop.  Just standing here and handing him water without ripping your clothes off is a challenge; you’ve still got half a joint left and you’re not even sure you’ve reached the come-up yet.  What if this is just the beginning?  What if this is just laying the foundation?  What happens when you actually peak on this shit?

“It’s not a big deal,” you repeat instead, keeping your answer as ambiguous as possible and taking a sip of the blessedly cold liquid.  At least the water is responding correctly to the frigid environment on this horrible fucking planet.  You feel ready to burn up.  “Just wanna make sure you’re cool.”

Cassian flicks his eyes over to the joint still cherried and smoking on the metal counter behind you.  “We can keep going.”

Your breathing picks up slightly.  Does he know what he’s really asking right now?  He has to have figured out what that spice does by now, right?  But no, he’s so steadfast in the way he looks at you, blinking up at you confidently.  Fuck, you should stop.  You should stop.

You should… compromise?

“If we keep going, no more of this,” you tell him, gesturing to the way he still hasn’t moved or drank any of the water in his cup.  “You need to.  Chill out, alright.  Act normal.”

Fuck, you’re normally so blunt and outspoken with him, so why is it that everything happening here is so fucking unsaid?  Everything is transpiring right below the surface, a conversation taking place within another conversation.  You’re telling him to cut the heart eyes, lay back on the bed and spend some rare quality time with his best friend.  Regardless of the weird side effects, this spice is still giving you an incredibly strong body high.  If he could just stop looking at you like that so you can stop rhythmically clenching and pulsing between your legs, you’d probably be incredibly relaxed right now.

“I will lay down,” he finally agrees, breaking eye contact with you and grabbing the pillow from his lap so he can throw it down next to him.  “Go, get the rest of it.”

“Drink.”  You stay rooted to your spot.

He gulps down the entire cup of water right in front of you, and something about how sassy and exaggerated it is makes you unwind just a bit and head back for the spice.

This is better, you think.  Butting heads with your strong personalities is better than whatever mind games you two were playing before, more familiar and grounding.  Cassian sets down his empty cup on the floor as you pick up the joint, and then you sit on the edge of the mattress across from him when you come back.

“So how were patrols?”  You ask him, taking another hit of it and studying the strange color it burns as you hold the smoke in your lungs, almost a light pink.

“Not bad,” he says, scooting back to lay lengthwise across the back of the bed.  His long legs stick off the end but he looks way more comfortable now, settling back into the pillow and watching you with a calmer, more easy-going look in his eyes.

“Where’d you get sent this time?”  You have to lean forward quite a bit to hand him the spice.

“The Lothal Sector,” Cassian responds casually, taking it from you.

“Oh, fuck off,” you snap, already unamused before he’s even started to mess with you.  “I will shoot down red leader tomorrow, Cass, don’t you dare fucking test m—”

“A local was trying to sell kittens to the pilots,” he goes on, completely ignoring you and relaxing back down into the mattress with the joint between his fingers.  “They were very cute.  But then I tell him no, because I did not know of anyone who could care for one.”

“That’s not fucking funny.” Cassian smiles slowly at you as you glare back at him very, very sternly.  “This is a no lothcat joking zone, I’m sensitive about this.”

He keeps smiling even as he takes his hit, gentle and fond and lovely on his face, but his eyes eventually go softer and a bit melancholy on the exhale.  

“I am sorry I missed your birthday, caraya,” he says to you truthfully, something sincere and tender in the way he looks at you.  “But I will get you something better than a cat.”

“What does that mean?”  You lean forward and grab the spice from him when he holds it out for you.

“No idea,” he admits during the careful exchange.  “Maybe something with less claws and teeth, I think.”

“No,” you shake your head, settling back on your butt once more.  “Caraya.  What does that mean?”

Cassian quickly opens his mouth to reply, but then pauses and takes a second.  As if he’s debating on what exactly he wants to tell you.  You inhale from the spice held between your fingers and wait patiently for him.  Probably something to do with birthdays, right?  Since he only started calling you that after you told him he missed yours.

You end up waiting for his answer so long, you actually feel like you should take another hit.  But when Cassian does eventually speak, it’s incredibly calculated and slow, like he’s actively trying to find the correct words to translate its exact meaning into Basic.

“Fest is part of a binary star system,” he finally tells you, breaking the silence.  “It is… it is what my people call the times when… when one of the stars sets while the other is rising on the opposite horizon.”

You pause with the joint halfway to your mouth, staring dumbly at him.

“It is rare.  I have seen it only twice.  Each time, for less than a minute.  It is very rare for them to match up perfectly, but when they do.”  His eyes go a bit softer, losing himself in his memories instead of concentrating so much on the words.  “The sky shines with every color.  Reds, yellows, and pinks to the west; blues, indigos, and violets to the east.  It is… it is also… something we call the ones close to us,” he continues, blinking his gaze slowly back to you.  “Caraya na cotâ vi zas iz’búsdari.  To care and be cared for is to feel the sun on both sides.”

You… you just keep staring at him.  Blank, unmoving, not really even breathing.  Your chest suddenly feels incredibly tight.  He looks back at you and stars, he looks so fucking gorgeous; long lashes dusting over his cheekbones at this angle, one hand resting lazily over his abdomen as he relaxes on your bed.

“It sounds…”  You sound winded.  “Lovely.”

“Yes,” Cassian returns softly, tilting his head on your pillow and blinking at you.  “It is.”

You don’t know why the fuck you thought this would be okay, honestly.  This whole thing was such a horrendous fucking idea right from the start.  You’re surprised you haven’t set the both of you on fire by dropping the lit spice between your fingers.  You were a fucking idiot to think you could resist him.  You were overconfident, underestimating him the way you did.  It’s like… like he’s approaching this in surges, almost.  Lulling you into a false sense of security for a bit, and then carefully pushes forward, toeing the line between best friend and person he wants to fuck and seeing how much you’ll let him get away with.

You’re… you’re a weak, spineless little thing.

“Is it—is it your turn?” You eventually ask him, looking down at the joint in your hands.  It’s barely above a whisper and it’s vaguely squeaky and it’s probably one of the dumbest fucking things you’ve ever asked in your life.  Of course it’s his turn, who the fuck else’s turn would it be?  

Cassian would normally rip into you for being such an idiot, but he doesn’t.  He just blinks softly at you, pupils dilated and glassy as they take you in.

“Would you like to…”  He sounds equally breathless now, swallowing thickly before he speaks again.  “You can… come closer, if you want.  Here.  With me.”  He pats his belly.  “No more reaching.”

What is… what is happening right now?  Is Cassian Andor actually, like—for real making a move on you?  His best friend?  The one he’s never looked twice at?

“You want me to…?”  Your cunt clenches.  Stars, you’re so wet already.  You can feel it, dampening your underwear as his eyes flutter slightly at the rasp in your voice.

“Come,” he pats his stomach once more.  “Lay down with me.”

You slowly begin to shuffle over to him on shaky knees, trying to move normally as he watches you.  He stretches out across the back of the bed, giving you a perfect spot along his open torso to relax into.  Your heart pounds as you carefully hand the spice to him before settling yourself on your back with your head on his tummy, making a little perpendicular t-shape with him on the mattress, vision slightly blurry but pulsing at the same time.

Maker, he smells so fucking good.  He smells like fresh snow and something warm at the same time, so lean and long above you.  You’re almost panting now, burning up in your thick layers as you try to get comfortable.

“Maker, it’s so fucking hot in here,” you whisper, using your sleeve to wipe the sweat gathering at your temples.  “Fuck.”

“Take off your shirt,” Cassian suggests quietly, and your mouth instantly goes bone dry, your chest forgetting to rise again after it collapses with a quick whoosh of breath.  “You have something on underneath, yes?”  He adds quickly before you can completely ignite in flames.  “Take off the top one.”

You… you have a thin undershirt on, but nothing underneath that.  It’s nearing three in the morning, of course you don’t have a bra on right now.  And the undershirt is white, and you’re sweating buckets, which means—

“It… it might show some…”  You have no clue how to phrase this, but Cassian quickly responds.

“It is just me,” he reassures, carefully reaching his arm around your head to hold the joint up to your lips for you.  You inhale the drug deeply, watching the pink light illuminate the tips of his fingers.  “We are best friends, and this is your room.  You should relax.”

Maker, this is… this is dangerous.  He’s dangerous.  He’s smart, choosing to go at it from this angle.  He’s not toeing the line anymore, he’s just… blurring it until it doesn’t exist anymore.  Or better yet, just walking over it and pretending it doesn’t exist at all.  Pretending nothing at all is happening between you right now.  Trying to see whether you’ll be more willing to give in if he comes at you from the side like this, not necessarily catching you off guard but refusing to outright confront you about it either.

Apparently precedent rules.  You’re a weak, spineless little thing, especially when presented with such a compelling out.  He’s… he’s totally right.  You are best friends, this is your room, and you should relax.  Nothing sexual about it at all, right?  Furthermore, relaxing trumps overheating any fucking day of the week, so… so that’s why you tell yourself it’s okay to sit up and immediately reach behind your head, grabbing the hoodie and beginning to pull the thick fabric off.  

Only, it’s damp and clings to your thin undershirt, dragging both of them up the length of your back as it goes.  You stop when the lower hem pulls up just below your breasts, trying to reach back behind your head even further and separate the two materials but struggling with the angle.

“Cass,” you eventually prompt, trying not to flush.  Not like he’d be able to tell, though; you’ve been unbearably warm and fidgety this entire time, your embarrassment conceals itself without your assistance.  “You wanna help me?  Or you just wanna keep watching?”

“Do not ask me such stupid questions,” he tells you plainly, unmoving.  “What did I say?  We are best friends.  Of course I am not going to help you.  You are…” he trails off when you lift your shoulders upright just a bit to see if the angle will work better that way.  It does, but the fabric drags further up your ribcage from the shift, “…You are nice to watch.”

Your heart pounds, and you’re even clumsier knowing he’s staring at your exposed tummy right now.  Maker, this should not be as difficult as it is.  You swing your arms back around behind you, arching outwards and trying to separate them from the bottom this time, but gravity doesn’t appear to work in your favor.  

Maybe you can do like, some sort of weird, half-and-half thing to get them apart?  Maybe?  Where you hold the undershirt from the bottom with one hand and pull the hoodie from the top with the other?

Yes, okay—that could possibly work.  Cassian inhales more spice as he lazes behind you, getting a front row seat to watch this subsequent genius unfold.

You get into your monkey-like position, beginning to pry the two materials apart from behind like you planned.  But then—oh, your undershirt still sticks to your hoodie at the front, pulling up a few inches with it and flashing the lower curve of your breasts to the room before you immediately halt and switch tactics, reaching back down and trying to pull them apart from the front withou—

A large, warm palm comes up to settle on your bare spine, right in the middle of your shoulder blades.

You freeze.  But Cassian doesn’t say anything, doesn’t do anything more than that.  He just holds his hand there, steady and solid against your upper back.

Neither one of you move.  It’s like… it’s like you’re both trying so hard to get a read on each other that your reactions are equally stunted.  Is he doing this to bring you to a still so he can help you?  Is he simply as blazed as you are right now and not thinking about things before he does them?  Is he—

But then Cassian starts slowly dragging his hand down your spine, carefully riding the gentle curve of it downwards as your breathing subtly picks up.  Your arms are halfway caught in the fabric, not able to stop him unless you untangle them and reach behind you.  So you just hold there statuesquely as his palm inches down the sweat-slick muscles of your lower back, thumb just barely brushing the hemline of your sweatpants.  

Fuck, you feel like you’re about to vibrate out of your skin.  Heat pools deep in your tummy, spidering outwards and sending pulsing shocks down your legs when he keeps his hand there for just a second.

Until… until he traces all the way back up and carefully hooks a finger around your undershirt.  

Your heart pounds as Cassian gradually pulls it over the top of your head with your hoodie, guiding you to bring both of them around your arms.  He pushes against your shoulder wordlessly, urging you to lie back down with your head on his stomach once more, the fabric stretched tight over your upper-body and the entire length of your spine now fully exposed as it touches the mattress.

“C-Cassian,” you breathe, fluttering your eyes up at the ceiling.

“Yes, caraya?”  He murmurs, and you completely forget what you’re going to say when he continues to pull the hoodie and undershirt down over your arms, exposing your naked breasts to the open air.

Your cunt pulses between your legs and you hear him throw the thick bulk of fabric carelessly on the floor.  “I—I-I don’t—”

“You will stay like this?”  Cassian tells you softly, brushing your damp hair back from your shoulder so that your bare chest is completely unobstructed as it faces the ceiling.  Your nipples are hard, a thin sheen of sweat covering your entire body, and you can feel his gaze drag down your naked skin, even if he doesn’t actually touch you.  No, he just takes another slow drag from the spice in his hand and tilts his head back to rest on your pillow, relaxing into the mattress with a gentle shuffle of his shoulder blades.  “If you are too warm, you will stay like this, okay?  Be comfortable.”

Is it possible to die from arousal?  Your clit is fucking pounding; everything from the waist down is unbearably tight and cramped.  Stars, you feel like you’ll cum if you even move wrong right now.  He told you to be comfortable, but you’re not—you’re boiling from the sensation, topless on your bed, trying not to close your eyes or squeeze your legs together.  It’s too fucking casual and unacknowledged, how he’s going about this.  You feel like you’re going to explode.

Cassian gently taps your bare shoulder to get your attention and shifts his head slightly to look down at you.  You bite your bottom lip and flutter your gaze sideways to meet his after a second, hoping you don’t look as flushed and tight with burning arousal as you feel.  Deep brown eyes look back at you, hazy and dilated.  He takes a second to slowly drag his gaze down the length of your half-naked body once more, now that he knows you’re watching him.  Your breath comes audibly now, quicker and shallower than it should be after laying flat on a bed for this long.

“Here,” Cassian prompts, holding the smoldering joint out for you to take.  His voice sounds raspier now, but still so… casual.  Like he’s out here talking about the weather with a mildly sore throat, not because your tits are out while you stare at each other and neither one of you is saying a damn thing about it.  It’s like he’s determined to hold onto the splitting tension, drag it out between you as long as he can.  “Want more?”

You know what he’s really asking, and it cramps your lower muscles up even harder.  He’s asking if you want more of this spice that’s currently getting you naked in front of him.  More of this madness, twisting up your insides with need and jumbling your thoughts.  More of him treating you like this, like there’s not a damn thing out of place in the universe right now, like you’re still just best friends so that’s why it’s okay you’re both doing this together.

Stars, do you want more?  Do you want him to keep winding you up like this?  More of this torture, this agonizing foreplay, wondering when he’ll finally give in and touch you?  Pretending like this is still completely platonic, like what’s happening here isn’t wildly unprecedented, insanely inappropriate, and so fucking hot?

You can feel your eyebrows pull up in the middle as you look at him, almost pleading with him to… something.  To stop, maybe?  Stop altogether, or just stop… fuck, stop ignoring the way your cunt feels clamped around itself tighter than a vice between your legs?  Stop neglecting your burning desire for him, even when it’s right in front of his face.  Stop refusing to acknowledge the way you’re just letting him look at you right now, how you haven’t once stopped playing along with this fever dream just in case you aren’t imagining it?  Fuck, but Cassian just looks back at you, his expression completely blank except for the smallest little glimmer in his eyes.  A silent, heated glint as he just barely quirks an eyebrow at you.

So you make the decision all at once.  You carefully reach over for the spice with your far hand, feeling your breasts shift towards him slightly with the slow movement.  Cassian doesn’t even feel like he’s breathing as you gently take it from him.  He just stares down at your naked chest and swallows thickly, eyelids dipping slightly as he moves to meet you halfway.

You let your nipple brush up against his knuckles just slightly with the exchange.

When you face back towards the ceiling again and readjust your shoulders flat on the bed, he lets out a slow, shaky breath under your head as it rests on his tummy.  The tension rockets up to eleven, weighing heavy and unspoken and ready to snap.  

But then like that, the moment passes—it’s just another invisible spark igniting between the two of you, just another thing buried beneath the silence and yet ringing so unbelievably loud because of it.  You’re both emitting and absorbing the same buzzing energy, amplifying it back to one another in a slow, endless feedback loop of rising pressure.

The spice comes up to your lips, and Cassian’s fingertips carefully trail along your other arm as it rests by your side.

“This is better, no?”  He asks you quietly, the rough tips of his fingers just barely gliding across your skin in small, mindless patterns.  They dance down your skin like feathers, tracing a small arch over the ridge of your elbow so lightly you almost feel like you might be imagining it.  Your eyes flutter when he gradually skims down the length of your forearm and brushes his thumb in a smooth circle around the bone in your wrist.  “Or you are still too warm?”

You bite your bottom lip when one of his fingers carefully stretches all the way up to your hip, running along the hem of your sweatpants.  

“Yeah, m’still a little—” you gasp, trying not to stutter when Cassian starts to draw up the length of your waistline, pausing right when his fingers reach your drawstrings.  “Little w-warm,” you finish hoarsely, painfully aware of how fucking wet you are, how your nipples are peaked and glistening with sweat as they move with your soft, shallow breathing.

He slowly dips one finger below the elastic wrapping across your hips, dragging it back and forth under the damp waistband.

“This fabric is heavy,” Cassian remarks, just the slightest husk in his voice.  “You… you will take this off, too?”

“I-I don’t—”  You’re about to say have anything on underneath except you immediately go quiet, because he’s suddenly slithering his entire hand down into your sweatpants and brushing his knuckles along the gentle slope of you.

He pauses once more when his longest finger reaches the very top of your slit.

But then he just holds it there for a second, tracing small arches back and forth along gentle give of it, the slight dip that separates your soft curls from your soaking heat.  You tighten up and wait in breathless anticipation for it, before the tip of Cassian’s finger finally comes to a rest over the soft split of flesh.

And then he’s suddenly pushing in, and down—

—fuckfuckfuckfuck—don’tcumdon’tcum—don’t—

You make a soft, vulnerable sound in bliss as he slowly slides his finger through the hot, slick cleft of your pussy.

“You are warm down here, too,” Cassian murmurs quietly.  Your eyes roll back when he drags the entire length of it up against your clit, letting you feel each individual ridge and joint and crevice across the swollen bit of flesh.  “Is it the spice?”  He asks, sinking his finger back down into you once more.  “Or are you always this wet between your legs?”

Neither.  Both, maybe?  Mostly it’s just him.  Cassian, whispering softly to you through the hazy darkness, lazily dipping his fingers into your cunt and letting it drench and engulf his skin in its heat.

“Tell me,” he prompts when you don’t say a word.  His finger pulls up and begins tracing slow, gentle circles around your clit.

“No,” you breathe haggardly, arching your hips up just slightly as he touches you.  “N-No, this is…”

“This is different,” Cassian confirms when you don’t finish your sentence.  He keeps circling your clit, and it’s like he’s just casually, carelessly stirring a pot that’s about to boil over and set everything on fucking fire.  You pulse threateningly under the tip of his finger, swollen and tight and just trying your best to control your breathing.  “So it is the spice.  Why you are this hot, this… this soaking.”

“It’s…”  Don’t you say it.  Don’t you fucking say it.  Don’t you turn this into something it isn’t.  “Yeah.  It’s—it’s the sp-spice.”

His finger follows the hard curve of you down to where you give, where you’re leaking wetness and heat from the source, before he’s suddenly shifting his wrist and pushing the entire thing into you down to his knuckle.

Now you do arch your hips, spreading your legs and helping him go deeper even as Cassian hums, stretching his finger and feeling you clench hot and tight around him.  He says something softly, something in a language you don’t understand.

And then he’s pulling out and rubbing circles around your clit again, the tip of his finger steady and firm as he steadily drags the pleasure out of you.

“We need to finish it soon,” he eventually reminds you, and it takes a remarkable delay for you to realize he’s talking about the lingering quarter of the joint still clenched tightly between your fingers.  “Take your hit.  We have a nine-hundred call, remember.”

Fuck, you bring the spice up to your lips with a shaky hand, trying to remember whether you should inhale or exhale first.  Cassian’s finger just keeps circling your clit, winding you up tighter and tighter.  His motions are so repetitive and predictable, but they’re somehow still lighting you on fire from the inside, slowing you down spectacularly as you try to take a steady breath in through the filter.

“Stars, you are so wet,” he remarks after a moment.  “Are you going to cum soon?  You feel like you are so close already.”

You are close.  Everything is swollen and slippery and tight, and hearing him say it out loud like that makes the pleasure rocket up even tighter inside you.  You don’t even feel him reach around with his other hand and take the spice from you.  You just lose yourself in the mindless sensation of Cassian’s finger on your clit, rolling your eyes back and reaching your hands down to fisting the sheets at your sides as he touches you.

“Does this feel good, caraya?”  He whispers quietly to you, inhaling deeply from the spice.  “You are usually so… mouthy with me.  Is this helping?  Do I need to rub your clit like this more often?”

“Fuck—Cassian, I’m gonna cum,” you tell the ceiling raggedly, chest beginning to arch up and hips bearing down.

“Do it,” he murmurs, reaching his thumb through your slick lips to pinch and roll the pulsing bud between his fingers.  “Right here.  All you can.”

And then wild, painful bliss stabs through you, launching you headfirst into a blinding orgasm.  A desperate sound tears from your throat as you cum hard all over your best friend’s hand, agonizing pleasure shredding mindless rapture through your veins.  It rings white noise through your ears and rips you apart from the inside out, arcing lightning down your spine more bright and explosive than ever before.  Fuck, it’s unprecedentedly powerful.  You’re drenched but your clit is hard and pulsing and swollen, and he’s able to keep it between his fingers the entire time your hips writhe desperately on the mattress.

Cassian inhales from the spice once more and massages your clit through the torturous, blazing hot aftershocks.  He drags the pleasure out of you until you’re a trembling mess, exhausted from the spasms wreaking havoc on your body.

But then… but then you’re still so hot.  It’s like your limbs have no energy left but your cunt is still pulsing and wanting more from him.  You feel your wetness coating his hand, your inner thighs, probably soaking through your sweatpants, but fuck, you want him to keep touching you like this—you want him to keep doing this.

It’s the spice, something tells you in the very back of your mind.  It almost made you black out with a wild orgasm and now it’s quickly preparing your overheated body for another one.  Your feet come up to brace against the mattress and your eyes close, jaw going slack as you grind feverishly against Cassian’s hand.

“Again?”  He whispers to you, fingers continuing to pinch and roll your clit and then—and then another debilitating wave of euphoria is suddenly slamming through you, pulling your chest up and flooding his hand with another series of wet, powerful contractions.  Cassian rasps something in his native tongue and rides you through the second one just as steady as the first, your pussy spasming uncontrollably as he slowly wrings the pleasure from you.

Fuck, it feels so good.  You’re worked up and trembling and trying not to whimper for him, desperately wanting him to keep his hand right here forever, buried right between your legs like this.  But you also—you also want Cassian to feel it too, feel the way the unrestrained hedonism practically burns you alive when you cum.

So you carefully turn over on your side and shuffle forwards a bit, resting your head on his lower stomach, right in front of the mouthwatering bulge in his trousers.  His fingers can’t fully reach your cunt from this angle, but Cassian is resilient.  He just drags his hand over your hip and slithers his fingers into your pussy from behind while you start unbuckling his pants with shaky fingers.

He’s unbelievably hard and throbbing and leaking when you pull his cock out of his underwear, the pulsing urgency of his erection not lining up with the way he’s still relaxing on your mattress, still hasn’t moved under you.  So you just hold his length up to your lips and open them, slowly sliding your tongue around the tip of him three times before taking his curved head into the hot cavern of your mouth.

Cassian takes a deep, shaky breath as you suck softly on the head of his cock, fluttering your tongue along a bead of precum he leaks from the slit.  He drags his fingers through your drenched pussy lips from behind as you carefully move your head down his tummy, opening your jaw wider and letting him fill your mouth deeper.

“Fuck,” he breathes, and you hum softly and lift your back palate slightly, sliding your tongue drift down his shaft and taking him a bit deeper still.  He shudders under you and pushes the tip of his finger up against your clit.

And then you shudder because Cassian completely bypasses your hood at this angle, bumping into the swollen bit of flesh without any resistance or protection and just… holding it there.  Barely moving an inch while you begin to slowly bob up and down just slightly around his cock, just keeping his fingertip right up against your clit and sparking heat down through your legs.

You move your hand down to cup his balls and start to roll your hips against his fingers.  Cassian’s breathing stutters as you lazily suck his cock, rubbing a tight little circle on your clit in silent encouragement.

“We should—” his voice is hoarse now, now that you’ve got his dick in your mouth and you’re gently swirling your tongue around it, almost as unhurried and casual about the act as he was bringing you to your first orgasm.  “We should do this.  More.”

You slowly pull off him, kissing the tip of his cock and mouthing at the way he’s steadily releasing thick drops of precum for you.  Cassian’s finger rolls firmly against your clit in response.

“You just want your dick sucked every time you come back to base,” you counter breathlessly, brushing your lips against him while talking with his cockhead resting on the edge of your tongue.

His hand shifts, and then he’s suddenly pushing two thick fingers deep inside you.  You moan around his tip and prop one leg up on the mattress so he can fill you easier, going back to sucking and swiping your tongue over his frenulum.

“I would not mind it,” he admits with a shaky exhale.  “You are.  Very g-good.  Fuck.  And wa—” he gasps, feeling you clench tight around his fingers, “—warm.  Fuck, every… everywhere.”

Fuck, it feels so good like this.  Laying here, topless and being penetrated two different ways by Cassian, feeling him throb in your mouth while you rest your head on his tummy, feeling him stretch your cunt walls with his fingers while you hold your legs open for him.

You pull off him to drag your slick tongue over your palm, coating your fingers in saliva.  Cassian groans when you wrap your hand around the thick base of him, and then he lifts his hips slightly as you start to slowly jerk him off into you mouth.

“Fuck—caraya, if you keep doing that, I will—” he whispers after a moment, curling his fingers inside you in warning.  You just tighten your grip and add just the slightest twist to your wrist and “Wait—wait—” Cassian grunts, starting to pull his fingers out of you—

You pull off him just enough to murmur the words against his throbbing head.  “You’ll want more than one, okay.  Trust me.  Cum like this, okay?  Cum just like this, right in my mouth.”

You wrap your lips around his cock once more and keep jerking him off slow and tight into the heat of your mouth, and Cassian’s abdominal muscles go incredibly tense under your head.  And then you squeeeeze your lower muscles around his fingers, and all the tension suddenly snaps.

His cock goes rock hard on your tongue and starts pulsing steadily as he groans out your name like it hurts, fingers stuffed deep in your cunt.  You swallow around him and moan, clenching rhymically around his fingers and letting him slowly empty himself into your mouth.  Fuck, he takes forever with it, shuddering and gasping and pumping cum down your throat, his orgasm clearly as powerful as yours was.  The spice drags it out, makes you both lose yourself in the raw heaven of release for far longer than normal.

The spice also prevents him from softening when Cassian finally stops spurting hot cum in your mouth.  You suspected as much—which is why you keep sucking his cock even as he stops throbbing, you keep him in your hot mouth even when he’s laying trembling and exhausted under you.  And he still stays rock solid on your tongue, swollen and needing more.

Cassian’s voice sounds shredded when he finally speaks.  “I—I am going to crash my x-wing tomorrow,” he tells you hoarsely, fingers finally slipping out of your channel with a vulgar, slick sound.  “You were right.”

You pull off him and kiss the tip of his cock one final time, making sure you’ve cleaned up the mess completely.  “Today.”

“Fuck.  Today,” he acknowledges tightly, adjusting his hips when you lift your head off his stomach.  “Fuck.  In a few hours.  You will make me crash, just thinking about this.”

“Why is it,” you turn around and blink at him, “that after literal decades of my friendship, you only acknowledge my perpetual rightness after I make you cum for the first time?”

Cassian just smiles softly at you, and his fingers are drenched as they rest lazily against your thigh.  “Caraya.  Two suns.  Twice the illumination, no?”

You bite your lip and try not to smile back at him, wanting to blush and roll your eyes in equal parts.  Stars, why is he so… so lovely?  Speaking to you so sweetly, looking back up at you from your pillow like you’re every single color in his sky.  Your heart seizes in your chest, staring at him with the same kind of fondness and admiration his beautiful eyes are shining with.  Fuck, you want… you want to…

“Can we… can we have sex now?”  You whisper.  Not really shy, but… but it almost sounds shy in its quiet, breathless hope.  

“You do not want me to taste you?”  Cassian immediately asks, reaching out with one hand to offer you what’s left of the spice while the other stays firmly wedged between your legs.  “I want to.  I have…”

You bite down on your bottom lip and take the nearly finished joint from him, feeling his fingers curl against your pussy lips at the same time and knowing you’re going to regret letting him finish his sentence.  He swallows thickly.

“I have thought about it,” Cassian eventually tells you, carefully admitting the words like he never expected he’d ever say them aloud and is completely unprepared.  “Sometimes.  Sometimes when… when I am about to sleep.  I think of… of you.  What you taste like.  Right here.”  He barely slips the tip of his finger back between your folds, fluttering his eyelashes at the way you’re still dripping in his hand.  “I bet you are so sweet.  Will you let me find out?”

Except.  Except you’re suddenly blanking.

He’s… he’s thought about you before?  Like this?  Fuck, he isn’t just… just saying that, right?  Just telling you what you want to hear?  Because fuck, it’s almost too good to be true; like everything out of his mouth since you first put his cock in yours has somehow sounded even better than the last.  You feel like you’re dreaming, and it.  It makes you almost frantic with need, overcome with the desire to solidify your connection with him before it can be ripped away like it always is.

You don’t respond to him.  You just quickly wiggle out of your sweatpants and get on top of him, swinging one of your legs around Cassian’s hips.  The spice is held in one hand while the other reaches down and aligns his cock right up against your opening.

Cassian grabs your thighs tightly and takes a long, shuddery breath under you.  Fuck, he really is a dream, isn’t he?  Long and lithe and beautiful, still throbbing and pulsing and ready for you after you already swallowed his first load.  You straighten your back and slowly sit down on his cock, letting the thick, hard length of it break you open slowly.

His hands trace up to your hips and then slide along the gentle curves of your sides, measuring the size of your ribcage before eventually grasping both of your tits in his palms.  You breathe through the pleasure and the stretch, letting Cassian pinch and roll your nipples between his fingers as you gradually slide down him and come to a rest flush against his pelvis.

Fuck he feels spectacular.  You can feel him pulsing inside of you, fitting and stretching the contours of your slick cunt perfectly.  You shiver and clench around him, finishing off the last hit of spice as you roll your hips slightly to adjust to the tight fit of his cock.

You twist your shoulders to carefully toss the smoldering roach into the sink when it’s done, really taking your time with aiming it to make sure you don’t miss.  The second it lands in the metal basin is the second Cassian grinds his hips up into yours while giving both of your nipples a gentle tug, and a jolt of pleasure rocks its way down your spine.

“Im-impatient,” you whisper, trying to scold him but it comes out sounding all wrong, far more needy and breathy than you wanted.

“I wanted my tongue in your pussy,” he whispers back in reminder, squeezing your tits as you start to circle and grind against him, letting you both enjoy the sensation of each other without any solid aim at the moment.  “You could not wait.”

“Later,” you gasp, tipping your head back and just—fuck, just enjoying his cock.  Enjoying how it feels, pressing up deliciously tight against something inside you that just absolutely loves the pressure.  You scoot yourself back just a bit, just so he is really shoved up hard against that spot as you grind and roll your body.  It ignites sparks deep in your floor muscles, makes you clamp tighter around him as you slowly ride your best friend’s cock.

And stars, Cassian just watches you.  He drags his hands over your naked body as it swells and rocks back over his hips like waves in the ocean.  He’s still completely clothed, and while something inside you wants you to get him as naked as your are, rub your exposed skin against his and make sure he never forgets how you feel against him, most of you is just fucking burning at the eroticism of being so bare and tall above him while he looks at you.

“Later,” he eventually repeats after you, definitively confirming what you said.  Cassian’s voice is somehow soft and rough at the same time, quiet but tight and hoarse in his throat.  “I will taste you later.”

You jerk a nod in agreement, starting to gain just a little bit of a rhythm on top of him.  Your eyes flutter closed as you lean your weight back slightly and begin to pull up when your hips twist in towards him, and then sinking back down on his cock when your hips circle back around again.

“Fuck,” you hear Cassian grit as you keep doing that, relaxing your lower muscles as he’s thrusted into you and then clamping down on his length as it’s slowly dragged out.  “Fuck, you are—a-amazing, caraya.  You are.  You are—fuck—”

A sinful heat starts simmering deep inside you as Cassian cuts himself off with a gasp and squeezes his eyes shut, starts rocking his pelvis up in time with your slow, sensual rotations.  Both of his hands clamp down hard over your hips as they continue to undulate in slow circles around his cock.

“Maker,” you whisper, trying to focus on your rhythm instead of the terrifying, building sensation inside of you.  Fuck, you can literally feel the threat of your orgasm start to carefully wind itself around the base of your spine, simmering and sparking with dark pleasure as it gradually spreads its electric claws outwards.  It’s huge.  You can already feel it gathering together inside you, culminating into something monstrous and fierce.

Cassian says your name, and you suddenly blink your eyes open at the unexpected urgency and tightness in his voice.  Your vision takes a second to focus on his gorgeous face, and when you immediately see the same exact storm of swirling desperation in his eyes, your jaw goes slack as you speed up, trying to chase him as Cassian all but hurtles towards the blinding explosion nearing its detonation.

“Fuck, I—” he gasps, and then he’s suddenly going rigid under you and cumming deep in your slick heat with a desperate sound, shuddering and gasping for you as his thumbs dig into your thighs.  Fuck, you grind harder, trying to find and focus on your favorite angle now as Cassian whimpers through the bliss and writhes under you, throbbing and pumping in steady, helpless jolts.

You whimper, too—fuck, you’re almost there, you’re gasping and trying to surrender to the swelling sensation, but it’s so intense and overwhelming and you’re close to tears because you’re fighting it just as much as you’re seeking it out, and—

And then the breath is suddenly knocked out of you when Cassian reaches up to grab you and flip the both of you over, your back coming down hard against the mattress.  He kneels between your legs, hooks both of your calves over his shoulders, props his arms next to your head, and then he starts thrusting.

You sob brokenly, slapping an open palm against his chest.  Fuck, his cock is still so hard and it shreds up achingly deep against that blinding spot so perfectly, you can’t focus on anything anymore.  The dark, evasive build immediately twists up sharp and impending as Cassian fucks you steady and deep, and you start to muffle your cries and gasps into the back of your hand.

But then, oh—words are coming, too.  Oh Maker, you can feel the urge to say them rise up along with the ferocious stirrings of your orgasm, clawing its way out of your throat before you can do anything to stop it.

“Fuck—” you tear your hand away to sob brokenly, not being able to stop yourself as the tsunami begins to peak, “oh, fuck—I love you.  Oh, fuck, I—I love you, Cassian—I love you, I—IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou—”

His cock splinters up against sheer euphoria inside you as you cum with a desperate wail of his name, pussy clamping down hard as it erupts into searing hot ecstasy around him.

—and then suddenly Cassian is lurching against you and bringing his lips down to yours, licking into your mouth and cumming deep inside you once more.  Maker, you nearly scream at the sensation, your tight cunt milking the throbbing length of him with endlessly wet, hot contractions as he grinds you both through the aching bliss.  He kisses you like he’s wanted to do it for years, bites your bottom lip as you whimper and spasm wildly around him.

Fuck, you can hear the mess you’re both making.  It’s obscene, filling the room with the slick sound of your desperate coupling.  Cassian eventually pulls his mouth away to look down at where he’s rocking into your drenched cunt, the evidence of his own pleasure slicking up hard lines of his erection.

Your eyes roll back when he doesn’t stop thrusting.

***

You lose track of everything.

Time, direction, responsibility—nothing matters, because Cassian goes on like that.  For hours, taking you apart every single way you can imagine.  You fuck the effects of the spice out of your body until nothing exists but him—Cassian’s cock stretching you, his tongue gliding along your skin, his whispered words of broken praise murmured against your neck.

Strangely, your body feels absolutely amazing when you finally manage to gain the slightest bit of awareness of your obligations again.  You feel like you’re floating above everything, almost dreamlike in how unbelievably satisfied you feel.  

You slowly blink up at the ceiling, and then suddenly remember the nine-hundred call you have to make.  You’re both naked, sprawled out on top of your mattress, and Cassian—

“Cass—” you rasp, pulling on the thick waves of hair tangled between your fingers and feeling his hot tongue slip out of your pussy.  It’s still slightly dark in your room, but that could just be the horrendous weather blocking the sun.  “What—what time is it?  Did we miss—?”

“Almost eight,” Cassian rumbles low against your thigh.  “We still have some time before we need to get up.”

You lurch into startled awareness, getting go of him to prop yourself you on your elbows.  “But that’s—no, we have to shower, and—”

“A ten minute walk to the hangar from here, yes?”  Cassian reasons, pressing a lazy kiss to your thigh and not sounding bothered in the slightest.  “Twenty minutes to shower together, ten minutes to get dressed.  We have at least ten more minutes before we need to think about getting up.”

You shudder and blink down at him, naked and relaxed as he mouths over your skin.  Maker, how can everything change and yet still be so familiar at the same time?

“I think I might crash my x-wing today,” you finally breathe out, dropping your shoulders back down to the mattress once again.

“No,” he returns, turning his head to kiss your other thigh.  “You will not.  Because I checked my holopad earlier, and they sent the coordinates for red squadron’s patrols.”

You narrow your eyebrows at the ceiling.  What does that have to do with anyth—?

And then you suddenly go shock-still under him, trying not to let the blind, overwhelming hope surge up inside you.

“Bring extra credits, caraya,” Cassian murmurs, lowering his head back down between your legs.  “We are going to Lothal.”

[melon-wing]

Unrequited Love [Ren/Grian/Impulse]

[Fanfiction Masterlist] Grian smoothed down the fabric of the costume he was wearing and smiled at his reflection. Mumbo had teased him earlier when he’d seen Grian’s costume hanging inside the base, but Grian loved it. Sure, the guy who had sold it to him off-world might have thought Grian was buying it for his girlfriend, but that hadn’t stopped his excitement.

He was dressed in all black, a top held up by an array of leather belts, with translucent fabric attached to it’s back and sides, when Grian moved around it flew nicely behind him and the little pieces of glitter sparkled like the night sky. Below it he just wore some simple black pants… Well, simple apart from the fact they were so tight it had taken him a good minute to get inside.

Grian picked up the gloves from his bed, and pulled one after the other over his hand and arm, the soft satin gently caressing his skin. They stopped a bit above his elbow. He turned to look at himself in the mirror again and smiled. There was a loud knock on his door and a loud string of curses escaped his mouth. Damn, was it already so late? He really should have taken less time doing his makeup, but he had just felt the need to put some on to complete the look. 

Grian hurriedly stepped into his boots, pulling them up all the way to his knees. There was another knock. He grabbed the rest of his outfit and strode to the door of his mansion hurriedly, pulling it open just after a third knock, to look at Mumbo, hand still raised from knocking.

“Took you long e- Grian! Oh my word!”

Mumbo looked him up and down and Grian knew that look he had on his face, the way his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“That is a rather... interesting look you got there. How in the world can you even walk in these?” Mumbo was staring at the boots and Grian smiled as he looked down at the heel as well, shrugging slightly. “Lots of practice. It’s not that hard once you get used to it”, he said and then let his eyes travel over Mumbo. “You look adorable.”

Mumbo was still wearing his suit and from afar, Grian probably wouldn’t have even noticed a change. Mumbo had two cat ears clipped into his hair and when Grian leaned a bit to the side he could see a black tail attached to the suit pants.

“I wanted to go as a secret agent again, but I was warned that I would not be let inside then, because wearing sunglasses is apparently not a real costume.”

Grian giggled and finally put a little black hat atop his head. He had considered also taking a broom with him, but it would have been annoying to carry that thing around for the whole party. Mumbo offered an arm and Grian took it, letting himself be led down the stairs by his friend.

“You really should have dressed up as an angel. Then you could have gone an evening without the need to hide your wings. I bet the others would have been impressed by that costume”, Mumbo said thoughtfully.

Grian only shrugged. “Not spooky enough”, he mumbled, though that wasn’t the real reason. He didn’t want the other Hermits to see his wings. He didn’t want them to know. Mumbo only knew because he had found out by accident. Not even Ren knew he was a Watcher and they had been getting closer and closer lately.

Mumbo chuckled a bit, luckily not picking up on Grian’s unconfident thoughts.

“Or could it maybe just be the fact that Ren told you he had a thing for ‘sexy lil witches’? Though I think you might have overdone the sexy part a bit.”

Grian could feel the heat rising to his cheeks immediately, as his mind wandered to Ren. Mumbo had hit the nail right on the head. While he hadn’t dressed up as an angel because of personal reasons he probably wouldn’t have dressed up like this if it hadn’t been for Ren. His best friend just knew him too well.

“I just liked the costume. And I bet he was talking to Impulse when he said that. You know? His boyfriend? His very serious and long term partner? Even some stupid sexy costume won’t change that”, Grian replied, going from flustered to saddened. “Just this once. I just want him to look at me and think I’m attractive once. I want him to look at me even a tiny bit the way he looks at Impulse.”

“Grian, you know they love-”

“Do you think Xisuma will have a new suit again?” Grian interrupted Mumbo suddenly, raising his voice slightly. He didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t even want to think about it. And while Mumbo gave him a knowing look he still indulged him in changing the topic.

It didn’t take them long to reach the area where Xisuma had set up the party, an open field just next to a forest. Everything was decorated for the occasion, lit up pumpkins surrounding the area. There were chairs and tables, crates of drinks and foods set up. Loud music came from some redstone contraption that Mumbo had built a few days ago. Xisuma greeted them with a smile, still wearing his armour, but at least he had changed its look once more, now resembling some spooky creature instead of the little friendly striders.

Grian’s eyes drifted to the people already there and then his eyes landed on Ren and Impulse, standing in one corner and he could feel his heart pulling him forward. He left Mumbo’s side, who only gave him a little sigh, probably knowing of Grian’s hopes. What if they’d look at him differently today? Maybe today they’d finally notice him in a different way.

Ren turned around first. He was dressed up in the robes he had worn back at the demise games, a hood covering his hair. The scythe he used to carry around was lying abandoned on a wall off to the side, along with some scary looking mask that he had probably added on to the costume, more fitting the style of his space themed area he was living in now.

And sure, the costume was probably not meant to be sexy, but the spooky and powerful vibes Ren gave of in this were such a turn on to Grian and he swallowed, almost tripping over in his heels. He raised his gaze from Ren’s costume to his face. Ren was looking at him open mouthed, eyes wide and Grian was pretty sure he saw a blush. He smirked. Well things were going as planned after all. Grian’s eyes drifted to Impulse and he froze for a second. Impulse was dressed up like he had been in Demise as well, fake blood staining his clothes that were partly ripped. A partner’s costume… Now wasn’t that nice?

Grian forced a smile onto his face and kept walking while knowing that those two pairs of eyes were fixed on him.

“Grian, dude! You look good! Only you would be crazy enough to pull off a look like that. It suits you!”, Ren said, pulling him into a half hug and patting his back a few times. Grian could feel the heat rising to his cheeks, looking up at Ren, right into his eyes. In his mind he was just throwing his arms around Ren and pulling him into a kiss, but that was just a fantasy.

“Thanks. You guys look good as well. That brings back some very nice memories of last season.”

“Like when you killed me, lil guy?”

Grian burst into giggles. 

“Your greed killed you, not me. Well your greed and your cute overexcitement when you jumped off that tank.”

Ren laughed as well and suddenly there was a hand on the side of Grian’s face, gently tugging a strand of hair behind his ear. 

“Well right now I’d say you’re the cute one between us, Grian.”

Grian’s heart was racing. He leaned into the touch, his breathing getting faster. Was it just imagination or was Ren leaning forward? Was this just another one of his daydreams or was this-

“Ren”, Impulse’s voice pulled them from the trance and Ren let his hand drop immediately, stepping back with a sheepish smile, before turning to Impulse and caressing his cheek the same way he had just done to Grian.

“No worries, my sweet little zombie boyfriend, I haven’t forgotten about you. I never would.”

Grian felt his heart aching as he forced the smile to stay on his face. Impulse looked at him weirdly, making Grian wonder if he knew how much Grian wanted to get in between them. Or maybe he thought Grian only wanted to steal Ren away… God, he couldn’t bear it if Impulse started hating him. He quickly raised his hands defensively and smiled.

“Yeah! I won’t use my charm to bewitch him, no worries. I have my eyes on someone else anyways. There was a reason I dressed up like this after all”, he just lied. He needed them to get off his trail and a crush on someone else would certainly remove all the doubt cast on him.

Ren looked confused and wanted to say something, probably to ask who that person was, but Grian didn’t give him a chance, making up some excuse about having to go over to Doc to annoy him a little next and he darted off to the table filled with drinks where Doc stood.

He had an easy time, falling into his bantering with Doc while getting a drink, both of them poking fun at the other’s costume. And seriously… A half creeper dressing up as a cat - “because seriously Grian, those things are scary as hell.” - was the funniest thing. At least Doc had put some more thought into his costume than Mumbo and actually looked good in the get up.

They were a few drinks in, both laughing at Grian telling another story of a prank he had pulled, when Doc was called away by Ren. An amused snort left his lips.

“Gotta go, G. Someone is not happy about us talking.”

Grian sighed, shaking his head. He didn’t really know what Doc was hinting at, but he’d probably know sooner or later if it involved some shenanigans on the server. Maybe something about the war in the shopping district. But he was still the tiniest bit annoyed at Doc for hurrying off. Just when he had started to have fun and forgotten about everything else. He took another full bottle and then went off to the side, sitting down on a small stone wall, letting his eyes travel over the party now going in full swing.

He smiled fondly, when he saw Mumbo. A very drunk Stress was sitting on his lap, painting whiskers on his face and by how flushed Mumbo was, she was definitely moving around more in his lap than absolutely needed and Grian bet she knew what she was doing. Despite the very obvious flustered state Mumbo was in, he didn’t seem too uncomfortable, so Grian wouldn’t need to pull one of his best friend saving moves. 

Doc had moved on from Ren and was now in a heated discussion with Iskall. Going from the way their hands were moving and their scrunched up faces, it had something to do with redstone. And well… Those two discussing redstone? That could take at least an hour. So much for Grian’s plan to go back to their little banter. 

That meant he had to find something else to distract himself. Or someone else… He knew for a fact that Bdubs wouldn’t say no if Grian came on to him. Maybe he could just have some fun and- 

He looked at Impulse and Ren again, Ren throwing his head back and laughing, Impulse smiling softly, and Grian’s heart jumped in joy.

Maybe he’d just get another drink after all.

~*~

The party had been going for a while now. And honestly, Grian wanted to have fun, he really tried to. He had downed a few drinks, hoping to loosen up, but the way Impulse and Ren stuck together, showing way too much PDA, was really putting his mood down.

Impulse leaned over to Ren, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, making the other giggle in amusement. Grian felt something tighten in his stomach. He wished he could make all his feelings just disappear, go and take the pain away. He wished he could turn back time to stop himself from ever starting the Hippies. If he had just let things go, maybe joined Area77 instead of fighting them, he could have just developed a crush on someone like Doc who probably would have been much more open to any advances Grian made. Maybe then he wouldn’t feel this overwhelmed and helpless right now.

Xisuma walked up to Ren and Impulse, talking to them and Ren stood up, waving to Impulse before leaving with their admin.

Grian felt relief flooding him, followed by guilt. He shouldn’t be feeling like that. He should be happy for his friends. It should be enough for him that the people he loved were happy, even if he wasn’t the one to give them their Happy Ever After.

This guilt burdened him every day, overwhelming him, combining with the sadness and jealousy, making him fall deeper and deeper into what felt like an endless hole of his own creation. He had tried to get out, tried to move on. It seemed impossible. It was as if his crush was a giant mountain he had to dig through, but all he had was a wooden pickaxe. 

Every time he looked at them, every time they showed any signs of affection for one another, everytime they were nice to him, everytime they kissed, the mountain just seemed to grow, becoming even more impossible to overcome. And he hadn’t even started digging yet, just standing in front of the mountain, frozen, unable to do anything.

Grian looked into his glass at his own reflection. He had really tried his best for this party. He had really thought he could sway them if he just looked attractive enough. It hadn’t worked.

“What’s got you looking so sad?”

Grian looked up at Zedaph and Tango, who both looked at him and then sat down on the wall next to him, both taking one side. Tango was dressed up in a white robe, little wings and a halo attached to his body to finish the look, wearing golden glitter all over his body. Zedaph on the other hand was wearing a red suit, with little bat wings and two red horns on his head.

“Nothing. I was just lost in thought. The question is what’re the two of you up to again? Playing a little angel and devil on my shoulder?”

They both giggled and it was Zedaph who spoke up first.

“Really no need for that if we both tell you the same thing. Although, if it helps, I can phrase it more crudely and Tango can make it sound more sweet.”

Grian looked between them in confusion as his eyes finally settled on Tango.

“What?”

“See, told you he would like to hear it said more sweetly, honey.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.”

Grian just raised his eyebrows in confusion and Tango smirked. A smirk that didn’t really fit the way he was dressed up.

“Well we noticed the way you were looking at our dear buddy Impulse as if he was a godly being walking among mortals.” “Also the way you devour Ren’s sexy ass.”

“Yeah, that as well. You’re pretty obvious.”

Grian felt a blush rising to his cheeks, against all effort to suppress it. He knew where this was going. This is why he had tried to hide his crush from the other Hermits as well. They would disapprove and tell him not to get in between those two. He didn’t want to hear how hopeless it was from somebody else. His mind was already doing a good enough job of screaming that.

“You guys really don’t have to worry! I won’t do anything.”

“Well now that is the problem and why we came here”, Zedaph said and Tango made a sound of agreement.

“Yes. I think Impulse really wouldn’t mind banging you.”

“TANGO! Language! Remember you’re the angel. I’m the one doing the dirty talk.”

Tango giggled and batted his eyelashes a bit, trying to look innocent. “Sorry. I meant Impulse and Ren really want to spend some quality time with you.”

Grian wanted to laugh at that. He did believe that Tango was telling the truth. What would he gain from lying? But what he was saying… This wasn’t what Grian had wanted.

He simply nodded and Zedaph went on.

“What Tango was trying to say is that the two of them have been talking about you. They’ve been doing that for a while but they won’t get their asses up and ask. And we noticed how sad you are. It really shouldn’t be our place to tell you, but since they’re too dumb to realise… They really would like you to join their-”

“It’s alright”, Grian interrupted Zedaph and stood up, gently smoothing down the fabric of his costume with one hand and then turning around to look at his fellow hermits. “I know you want to help, but I’m really not interested. You must have misunderstood.”

It was weird. All they were saying made his heart race and hurt at the same time. He wanted to be with Impulse and Ren. He really did. He would give anything to be with them. But to hear from someone so close to them that all they were interested in was Grian’s body and to have a little adventure with him? It hurt so bad.

“If you’ll excuse me now, I need another drink. Maybe try your angel and devil spiel on someone more interested. I think Mumbo’s pining hard for Stress and too scared to make a move. I’m just fine.”

Without letting Tango and Zedaph protest he went over to the drinks again, putting his empty bottle into one of the crates and looking over the selection of drinks. He heard a noise and raised his head, looking to the forest. Ren stood there between the trees, staring at him through the holes of his mask, beckoning him with one hand. Grian blinked in confusion, turning his head to look behind him. Surely Ren meant Impulse and not him. But Impulse was still sitting off to the side and no other Hermit was close by. Noone was even looking in Ren’s direction and Xisuma still had not returned. Grian turned back. Ren was still waving him over. So Ren really did mean him. Grian felt his heart skip a beat when he walked around the table and up to Ren. But just when he reached him, Ren turned around and started walking into the forest.

“Ren? What’s up? You already done with whatever help Xisuma needed?”

Ren just nodded and kept walking and Grian stumbled a bit trying to follow him. This forest ground was really not made for high heels.

“Do you want to show me something?”

Ren nodded again and Grian smiled a bit uncertain. Well Ren surely was full of surprises and this might be one of them.

“Well let’s go then. Just… Maybe a bit slower. I really don’t wanna fall down.”

Ren turned his head a bit, looking at him, but Grian really couldn’t make out any expression with his mask back on his face again, covering everything but his eyes, the hood so low that it cast a shadow, making even his eyes disappear.

Ren made a hum of agreement. It seemed to echo and Grian looked around in confusion. Well that was a strange effect. The trees weren’t even close enough to produce an echo…

“Where are we even going in such a hurry? What do you have planned? Any prankage happening?”

“Hungry… So hungry.”

Grian looked at him a bit confused, but then smiled again. “Oh well that explains the hurry. You really should have gotten something from the snack bar before taking me here. Just… A little slower then.”

They started walking again. Slower this time, giving Grian the opportunity to walk up next to Ren. He kept looking down at Ren’s hand, right next to his and his heart was racing as he decided to be brave. He let his hand brush past Ren’s a few times and when he didn’t pull away, Grian just grabbed it gently. He expected Ren to pull away or make a joke, but he just closed his fingers around Grian’s hand, holding it tight.

Grian smiled.

He’d have this at least.

~*~

Impulse smiled as he watched Ren and Grian retreat into the forest. Everything was going according to plan. He had been a bit worried when he had seen Zedaph and Tango approaching Grian. They had kept threatening to tell Grian everything if he and Ren didn’t finally pull their heads out of their asses and confess.

But they were ready now. They had planned everything. They had waited so long for this evening. Ren would talk to Grian now. Alone without Impulse, so they wouldn’t overwhelm him and so the others wouldn’t notice. Grian could let Ren down gently without feeling pressured in a two against one situation. And since Ren and Grian had been closer before Impulse had entered the picture, Impulse had let Ren have the honour of confessing for both of them.

Impulse would get his own opportunity to shower Grian in love later, if everything went according to plan. It had been kind of cute, seeing Ren so overeager the whole evening. He had almost spilled their secret the moment his eyes had landed on Grian in his sexy costume. And Impulse could understand that sentiment. One comment from Ren and Grian had dressed up like that. It really had to mean something. Both of them were so confident… He just wished Ren would have told him he’d go for it now after he had been done helping out Xisuma with setting up the fireworks. It had just been a lucky coincidence that Impulse had glanced up when Grian had followed Ren. 

Impulse kept glancing at the forest, heart racing as he fiddled with the scythe lying next to him nervously. He knew a talk light that might need a while. Ren surely would have some explaining to do. Impulse just wished he was still able to see them between the trees. They couldn’t have gone more than a couple of metres after all.

A few minutes passed. Impulse’s fingers kept twitching, his leg bouncing up and down. He rolled the scythe back and forth on the little wall. A loud clattering sound yanked him out of his thoughts and he looked down in confusion, bending down to pick up the object that had fallen. He looked at it in confusion. It was the metal mask that was part of Ren’s costume. He had abandoned it earlier in the evening, because he had said it was weird to have his face covered all the time. 

Hadn’t he just worn that when he had walked into the forest? Impulse was pretty sure he had seen it on Ren’s face… 

“I’m back!”

Impulse raised his eyes from the mask to Ren who was walking up to the little wall, Xisuma only a few steps behind him. He wasn’t wearing a mask… He had come out of the opposite direction of the forest.

“Ren…? How… How did it go? What did he say?” Surely Ren must have just rounded the party, maybe he had taken a walk while talking to Grian. Surely there was a logical explanation.

Ren stepped up to him, tilting his head, scrunching up his forehead in confusion. “Xisuma?”

“No. Grian. What did he say?”

“I… What?”

“Didn’t you just go into the forest with him?”, Impulse asked, a weird feeling rising in his stomach. “Oh god, did he take it that bad and ran off?”

“Impulse what are you talking about? I was just helping Xisuma out. It took a bit longer because he’s crazy and went completely overboard with the fireworks again.”

Impulse suddenly felt panic rising. He had seen Ren walk into the forest with Grian. He was so sure of that. But had he really seen Ren. With the robe and the mask covering the whole body.

“Ren… I just saw someone dressed in your costume take Grian into the forest. I thought you were going with him for a talk.”

Ren froze up a bit as well, his smile faltering a bit. 

“You think someone is playing a prank on him? You don’t think Tango or Zedaph would pretend to be me to get this done with?”

They both looked to the party and as Impulse’s eyes drifted over the people his heart began sinking further and further until Ren uttered the words that made his heart almost stop, voice filled with dread.

“Everyone else is here.”

Impulse sprang into action at once, running over to Xisuma and grabbing the admin who dropped a crate of fireworks.

“Impulse? What the…?” “X! You need to teleport Grian over here right now!” Xisuma looked at him in a mixture of confusion and worry.

“Impulse. Calm down. What’s going on?”

“Grian went into the forest with a person and everyone whitelisted is here. X! He could be in danger!”

Xisuma seemed alerted at once, the helmet lighting up with what Impulse knew was the admin console. He let go and Xisuma typed something apparently into thin air. Impulse waited with bated breath. A teleport wouldn’t take long. It was a simple command. A very simple command. Seconds passed. Xisuma was typing again. And again. And again, his movements getting more frantic.

“I can’t teleport him. Something is interfering with my powers.”

Impulse felt like someone had dumped an ice cold bucket over him, desperate eyes looking to the forest.

“No… Grian.”

~*~

Grian felt his heart racing as they kept walking, the forest growing more and more dense. They were lucky though, no mobs were spawning and Grian wondered if Xisuma had tweaked the world’s settings a bit for their little party after the phantom fiasco of last year when all the redstoners had forgotten to get some sleep in a bed before the big event.

“Is it much further? I don’t think I can go back if we walk any longer. I might look confident in these heels, but they’re not made for long distances.” Grian gave a small chuckle, but Ren didn’t say anything. It was weird, just how quiet he was. Usually Ren would chatter all the way to some destination. It was hard to get him to stop talking.

“Ren is everything alright?”

“Hungry…”

Grian made a confused sound and looked around again. Something felt off. Something wasn’t right. The forest was quiet. Too quiet. This was not natural.

Grian cast a look at Ren, but he seemed really focused ahead on whatever way he had planned out for him. He wouldn’t notice… Grian concentrated and he knew his eyes were glowing slightly. Ren’s fingers twitched, tightening on his hand and Grian wondered if he somehow felt the Watcher magic. But there was no way he could. He would only notice if he turned and noticed the glow in Grian’s eyes.

Grian let his magically enhanced senses spread out. There was nothing. Nothing at all. And that was a huge red flag. There was always something. He always felt something. There was no sign of any living being, alive or dead close by. Not even a tiny insect. Not even...

Grian suddenly stopped, pulling his hand from Ren’s grasp.

Not even Ren.

He took a few hurried steps back.

“Ren. What is going on? Why… Why do you have no life force?”

There was a weird echoing sound and it took Grian a few seconds to realise that it was laughter. Deep, distorted laughter. And it was coming from Ren.

Ren raised a hand to the mask, taking it off as the hood of the robe fell back as well. 

Grian was staring straight into Ren’s face. It looked like Ren, but the expression seemed so twisted. A grin he had never seen on Ren’s face, revealing sharp teeth when he opened his mouth.

“I’m hungry.”

Grian took a few steps back again. Ren’s mouth stretched open so much further than a human mouth could, revealing so many sharp teeth.

“You look tasty. You smell good”

Grian raised his hand up as fast as he could, but Ren - no, not Ren, something - was faster as he was pushed against a wide tree with a force that was not human, his head hitting the wood hard, making him dizzy.

He summoned his magic up, a purple glow surrounding his whole body. He’d just push the creature off, summon his wings and run off. He just needed another second to collect his energy and-

The creature moved forward. Grian expected an attack, but suddenly lips were pressed against his. It felt weird, it felt wrong. He couldn’t move. He couldn’t pull away. The glow around him started to flicker. He tried to summon his magic, but it kept slipping from his grasp. And then the glow disappeared completely. The creature pulled back from him. His face morphing into that of Impulse and Grian looked at it out of breath, feeling so weak all of the sudden, his legs beginning to shake.

“W-what…?”

“You really are tasty… Unrequited love. The amount of sadness. Loneliness. Desperation. It all called out to me so loud. So tasty.” The creature licked its lips, a long tongue darting from the wide mouth. “I’ve never had a taste this good. Being in love with two people… Must be painful.” Another laugh, echoing all around Grian’s head, Impulse’s voice being distorted as if another voice was speaking at the same time. ”And you have magic as well. This meal will last me for centuries. I will enjoy every last drop of your energy until you’re nothing but a hollow shell… and then I’ll devour you.”

Grian made a tiny sound, raising his hands, weakly trying to push the creature away, but he couldn’t stop it from moving forward again.

“Goodbye, little witch.”

There were lips on his again and Grian’s legs buckled when he grew even weaker. An arm snaked around his waist, holding him upright, as the lips pressed harder against his. 

So this would be his end.

He really should have confessed to Impulse and Ren.

For someone two centuries old he really was a coward.

The creature pushed harder against him. Grian felt sharp teeth. 

His vision swam, black dots dancing in front of his eyes. He searched for his magic. What was usually a roaring wildfire inside of him was now nothing more than a flickering candle flame and he directed it all to pull deeper inside, pulling it down to protect his magic core. He already felt a crack forming at what was essentially his soul, pain spreading through his whole body.

He’d die.

He’d die here and his friends would never even find his dead body, not knowing about his fate, searching for him and maybe one day thinking he abandoned this world.

Grian felt a tear run down his face. His hands fell from the fabric of the robe, his arms dangling uselessly at his side now. It was over.

A loud scream. Grian was falling. There were loud noises. A taunting voice. The creature. Screams. He needed to open his eyes again, to see what was going on. He was on the ground. Would he be devoured now? Something pressed against Grian’s lips and for a second he thought even his last bit of energy would be sucked out now, but it didn’t feel like lips. It was more hard and cold. It pushed unrelenting until Grian opened his mouth the tiniest bit. Liquid started to flood his mouth and through the fog he realised that he knew the all too familiar taste of Stress’ brewing. He swallowed the potion greedily, feeling at least some of his energy return.

Slowly he opened his eyes to see Impulse and Ren’s worried faces right above him, Ren being the one to hold the potion up to his face. Xisuma stood behind them, helmet abandoned, a sword still in his hands. All of them were covered in something that looked like black blood. The bottle of potion disappeared and Grian opened his mouth, but his voice was still weak and barely above a whisper.

“What happened…?”

“A succubus”, Xisuma replied, voice cold as he looked at something on the ground. Grian followed his gaze. On the ground was a body, but it was no longer wearing Impulse’s or Ren’s face, but a weird distorted monstrous grimace, hollow eyes staring emptily at the sky. “I don’t know how it managed to sneak inside this world. I’m glad we made it to you in time. From the way it was glowing I’d say another minute and you would have been dead…” Xisuma stopped and looked at Grian searching for something. “We’ll talk later about why a succubus was also sucking magic from you and not just energy.” 

Grian smiled weakly and nodded.

“I also think the three of you need to talk. I don’t really want a repeat of this. We’re not taking chances… Message me when you’re done. Teleport works again.”

Grian stared after Xisuma in confusion as he walked over to the body, touching it, which caused it to disappear in the green light of his admin magic. Xisuma took one last look at them and then walked away as well. Grian turned to Impulse and Ren, about to ask what this was about, when two pairs of arms pulled him up and he was crushed in a hug.

“Guys…?”

“I’m so sorry, Grian. So sorry. This is all our fault”, Ren whispered, his voice heavy with sadness. Grian didn’t understand why he sounded so sad, but before he could ask, Impulse continued, voice sounding just as depressed.

“It told us. You were just targeted because of us. Because you love us.”

Grian felt his heart sink, his eyes widening. Right. The creature had talked about feeding on his unrequited love. Oh god. It had told them. The taunting voice he had heard in his dazed state. That must have been it.

“I- It’s- I’m…” Grian took a shaking breath. “It’s not your fault. You can’t change the way you guys feel. It’s not your fault you love each other and not me.”

They both pulled back, but only slightly, arms still on Grian as they all sat on the forest floor.

“But Grian…” Ren looked at him, eyes shining as he gently caressed Grian’s back. “We do. We really do love you. We were just cowards. If we had just told you earlier that we loved you”

“You… What?”

“We love you”, Impulse answered, smiling softly. 

Grian sobbed loudly and he felt the stinging of tears in his eyes, trying real hard to hold them back. He didn’t want to get his hopes up. He couldn’t.

“You really don’t have to say that. I don’t need you to pretend The possibilities of another succubus coming by is really low and I bet Xisuma will raise the defenses after today and-”

There was a finger on his lips. Ren’s. Both of them smiled. Both of them looked at him with nothing but love.

“Grian, we really do love you”, Ren said and Grian couldn’t hold the tears back any longer, letting them flow freely, raising his arms to put them around the other two now again, all of them pressed together tightly.

“God, I love you two so much.”

“We know”, Ren said and chuckled softly. “Almost dying to a love sucking monster is a really crazy way of confessing though, G-man, just so you know.”

Grian laughed through the tears as well and when he pulled back he smiled at them softly. He might have almost died and he still felt far too weak to even walk back, but the way those two looked at him, as if he was the most precious being in this world right now made him think that this might be the best Halloween he’s ever had after all.

[binnie-loves-dark]

Strangers in the night (Changbin x Y/N)

A content sigh left your lips whilst reading a book, sitting atop your camper van admiring the beauty of the luscious green fields and valley below. You lived a simple life. Just you and your faithful feline friend Ziggy to keep you company. The sun was beginning to enter its journey of setting, a signal that it was time to move on to your next location for the night before night truly fell.

You turned the keys in the vans ignition only to be met with a merciful groaning sound scaring both you and Ziggy in the process.

You held back a chuckle at the poor cats response “Sorry buddy! I didn’t mean to spook you, sounds like Daisy doesn’t want to start. Let’s try that again shall we?”

Grrr....grrr...grrr

Nope she definitely didn’t want to go. “Great” you cursed aloud and hit the steering wheel. The night sky was begging to draw ever closer followed by the quiet echos of coyotes howling in the distance. You knew you should have left earlier rather than risk getting stuck in the middle of unfamiliar territory.

Opening the drivers door you grabbed the torch stored away in the glove compartment. Popping up the hood of the campervan nothing looked unordinary or suspicious. A few taps and nudges here and there usually did the trick to fix any problems, but this time it was not the case.

You knew the basics of how to fix and take care or your campervan but never anything too technical. The nearest garage repair shop was at least a few miles away, much too far to walk this late at night - especially alone.

Admitting defeat you were busy fishing out a couple of blankets from the trunk which you kept for emergencies such as this deciding the only choice you had was to spend the night here. That was until a set of headlights came into view nearby. Seeing this as an opportunity to potentially get some help or at least a ride to the nearest garage you stepped out towards the rubbly road and stuck an arm out to try and grab the drivers attention.

It didn’t look like whoever was driving had noticed you and wasn’t going to stop. However a few meters past you down the road red brake lights suddenly appeared. You slowly paced up to the drivers side hoping it wouldn’t be anyone with sinister intentions. The window wound down and you were met with a set of sparkling bright eyes paired with a rather sharp but also elegant looking face which took you aback slightly.

“Can I help you?” The stranger coughed.

Dammit! You didn’t realise you had been staring for such a period of time that would be deemed uncomfortable to anyone.

“Oh umm I’m so sorry. Aha!” You giggled awkwardly. “Umm I kind of could do with some help. My campervan doesn’t want to start and I’m out of ideas of what it could be. Would you possibly mind taking a look and see if I’ve missed anything obvious?”

“Sure.” Was all the stranger hesitantly replied, his cold attitude and words certainly didn’t match his looks.

Turning away from his truck you slowly plodded back to your van not holding out much hope for him to find a solution. You tossed the keys over to him so he could start looking at what could be the issue.

Grrr...grrr...grrr was all that could be heard from your beloved van again. He stepped out from the drivers seat and moved to the hood of the vehicle and started doing the same basic examinations and tests you had previously done under your torch’s spotlight.

“Can you keep the light still, I can’t see where anything is if you keep moving!” He grunted.

“Sorry! I’m just cold that’s all” It was almost the dead of night after all.

“Here, take this” suddenly you were engulfed by the hoodie he previously wore. “Oh thanks” you shyly blushed. No one had ever made this sort of gesture towards you before, always keeping yourself to yourself resulted in spending a lot of time on your own. Not only was he helping try to fix your van but you now had his hoodie to stop you freezing from being exposed to the elements. It smelt faintly of his cologne, a woody scent with a slight citrus spice to it. It strangely comforted you for some reason which didn’t go unnoticed by him.

“My names Changbin by the way.” He said looking at you whilst scratching the back of his head.

“I’m Y/N” you quietly replied. “And thank you for all this. Having any luck yet?”

He sighed “I think it’s something possibly to do with the conversion unit. But I’m not entirely sure, that kind of thing is way past my expertise level and is probably gonna be costly to get fixed.” Disappointment was strewn across your face, you felt absolutely devastated. A slight tear started to emerge from the corner of your eye, the reality of the situation starting to dawn on you that your most beloved and prized possession had given up.

A hand reached to your shoulder “Hey don’t be upset. I may not even be right! Guess he means a lot to you?”

“It’s a she actually!” This came out much colder than you anticipated it to but blamed it on your emotions getting the better of you. “She’s called Daisy and yeah we’ve kind of been through a lot together. Apart from dear old Ziggy sleeping in there she’s the most special thing to me.”

“Daisy, oh it’s a cute name” He had rested his back on the now closed hood of your van. “You had her for a long time then I guess?”

“You could say something like that. I’ve had her since high school, we’ve travelled a lot which kept me sane and helped me find my true self along the way.”

“Oh right. It’s nice you have a story and she’s in really good nick. Just a shame she’s decided to pack up now”

“It’s fine honestly. I’ll just wait for sunrise and take a walk to the nearest stop and see if they can help get her started again. Thanks for trying though.” You circled round to the other side of the truck gathering up the blankets once more as a puzzled Changbin took a hold of your wrist.

“You’re not seriously going to stay out here all night on your own are you?” He looked down at you, creases forming between his eyebrows from frowning.

“I’ll be fine!” You brushed him off of your arm. “I have blankets, some spare food and some water so I’ll be fine until then. Honestly you don’t need to worry about me.”

“Y’know you could always come back with me. I’m only a couple of miles away from here. Only if you’re comfortable to though, don’t feel pressured. I just can’t consider myself a gentleman if I don’t even offer.” He scratched the back of his head again, this must be what he does when he’s nervous. Initially you thought there was no chance you’d go anywhere with this stranger, but a part of you also realised the contrast to how he acted towards you in the beginning. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as you first thought.

“Okay, but don’t try anything funny. Otherwise I’ll... I’ll set Ziggy on you!” He smiles followed by a giggly laugh and you once again realised how breathtaking his features were. His smile kind of made you feel weak at the knees like you were school girl all over again.

“Is that supposed to be a threat?” He grinned whilst raising an eye brow at you.

“You betcha it is! Are you sure you don’t mind? Hopefully it will only be for one night.” “Of course not! Why would I offer otherwise. Now come on, grab your basic things and put them in my trunk.”

You scrambled some of your essential belongings together into a satchel as quickly as you could. Also making sure Ziggy has his harness and lead securely fastened before picking him up from his luxurious pillow seated on the front passenger seat.

Locking Daisy up you felt a pang of guilt for leaving her here for the night. “It’s alright old girl. I’ll be back in the morning and hopefully we can make you as good as new again”. You made your way to Changbins truck and found Ziggy already asleep in the backseat. He probably had no care as to what was going on and was just happy to be in a warm cozy bed wherever it was situated.

Securing your seatbelt you turned to face Changbin to thank him once again for all of this. “Y/N you don’t need to keep thanking me. What kind of a human being would that make me if I left you out here all alone tonight.” He set off on the journey home. You both made awkward small talk the whole journey and realised you actually had more in common than first thought. Sharing a passion for photography and travelling amongst other things.

The journey wasn’t too far and you were soon met with a log type cabin which you assumed is where you’d be staying for the night. It didn’t look much to the eye but considering the beauty of the surrounding area it blended in perfectly.

You dumped your satchel by the front door and went over to help Changbin who was busy preparing two hot chocolate supremes to warm you both up. It was the most delicious looking drink you had ever set eyes on. The deep dark chocolate at the bottom of the glass soon blended into a more faded colour the closer it got to the squirty cream which was topped with marshmallows, grated chocolate and a slight sprinkle of cinnamon.

You both sat on the sofa facing the wood fire, hot chocolates in hand, sleep starting to overcome the both of you. It was you who gave into sleep first. Changbin was in mid conversation when he heard your slight breaths turn heavier and indication you were sleeping. Instead of disturbing you he grabbed one of your blankets and placed atop of you before lightly brushing back a streak of hair with his index finger that had fallen into your face. It was at that moment he realised the natural beauty you carried so effortlessly. How had he not noticed sooner? For some reason unbeknownst to him he felt a pang in his heart. He felt like he had known you forever, not just mere hours and could have watched you peacefully sleep all night.

Instead he slowly got up and placed a small kiss to the top of your head “Sweet dreams love” before placing himself in his own bed and allowing sleep to consume him too.

[thorinthehottotty]

Thorin Thursday - Battle Scars

A/N: Someone teach me how to do the 'keep reading' thing. Please. These are too long...

Summary: You find a drunk Thorin and decide to join him. It leads to you two showing off your scars and tattoos.

Warnings: Smut... Thorin falls asleep when he's not supposed to.

When you went in search of the king late in the night, you didn't expect to find him toasted in front of his fireplace. You suspected him to be awake, he usually was these days. He just wasn't wired for sleep. So when you hear him muttering beyond his door you open it with a knock.

"Hey, honey, who are you talking to?" You ask, looking around, half expecting Dwalin to be here.

"Y/N!" He cheers, shocking you. Your eyes find the empty bottles of ale near by. He was drunk? The king was drinking? That was new. "Dwalin has retired to his room! Join me!"

With a grin, you approach where he's lounged across a love seat. You gladly joined the king, sinking into a chair nearby as he passed you a bottle. You popped it open and he reached forward to tap the bottles, a grin stretching across his flushed face.

"What's the occasion?" You ask, smirking at the loosened king.

"We were celebrating. We've recieved word that the dwarves of Eren Luin will arrive in a few short days. Enough renovations have been completed to support the new subjects."

"Congratulations!" You eagerly respond as he begins to babble on about his uncertainties to the cause. He wasn't sure he would finish in time, that they could make it all that way. Only when you giggled did he stop.

"What?"

"I didn't expect you to be so cute when your drunk." You respond. He blinks in surprise. He tries to look angry but it's too playful in his drunk state. You take a swig of the ale.

"I am hardly 'cute'."

"No, no. You're absolutely adorable." You argue. He laughs back at you, shaking his head.

"I think you mean 'breathtakingly handsome'!" You burst into genuine laughter, not expecting that response.

"Thorin, you are the handsomest little shit I know." He grins proudly, proping himself up on an elbow.

"What makes me so 'cute'," he asks.

"The constant jabbering was not expected, honey. I like it. Its nice to see that smile." He flops back with a groan.

"I decided to indulge. My old wounds are stirring with the oncoming winter." You blink in suprise as he drags his loose tunic up, exposing his ribs and abdomen. He'd finally started filling out like dwarves were supposed to. Instead of just muscle. He had a healthy, and sexy bit of fat on his fuzzy belly. It made you incredibly happy to see it. But the scar on his side was still dark in color. You nearly reached out to touch it, already feeling the buzz of the strong dwarvish ale.

Instead, you tilt the bottle back for a long swig. The bitter taste increasingly delicious as you nursed the bottle. "That's healing nicely," You respond, peeking a bit lower than necessary.

"Aye. How is yours?" He asks, not drawing his top back down. He was refering to the two arrows you took during the battle of the five armies. One went right into the back of your thigh, at an angle. It had grazed the bone but effectively made it all the way through. The other nailed you through your shoulder.

You reach for your skirts, dragging it up your thigh. He doesn't seem phased as you show off your leg. The scar is still dark purple. "At least it went all the way through," you chirp and twist to show him the back as well.

"And your shoulder?" He ask.

"That one's been acting up too." You let the skirts drop and unlace the top of your dress a bit. Dwarven fabrics were thick and sturdy so you had to force some give to it. When it's unlaced enough, you slide the fabric over to see it. It dented in just a bit still.

"You've finally got some battle scars then." He chirps.

"Just because that was my first battle doesn't mean I don't have others!" You protest and lift your hands toward him. "Most of these are bites from animals!" He leans forward to inspect them.

"Shouldn't be shoving your hands near their mouths."

"Oh, I'd like to see you pull a chicken from the jaws of a wolf." Thorin gives a great belly laugh and reaches down to pull his whole tunic off. Oh, it was like a candy shop. You can see where the white warg tried to take a bite of him. "YOU CHARGED RIGHT AT THAT WARG! DON'T EVEN GO THERE!" You say, shoving him back on the couch. He laughs as you pretend your hands didn't linger on him.

"Fine, I'll give you that! This one is from the battle of Moria, where I fought the pale orc." He gestures to his back as he twists. A large gash of a scar stretches over his shoulder. With a tipsy grin, you tug at the ties of your dress and push it down to your hips. Then you push for the corset beneith it.

"Back when I was a barmaid in a town of men I got shanked a few times in a bar fight." You drag open the corset, uncarring that your top half was fully exposed as you show him the three seperate occurances of being stabbed.

Thorin stood then, directly in front of you as he kicked off his boots. You could see his foot healing nicely. Then he reached for his trousers and you, the bottle he dropped his drawers and stood before you naked in all his dwarven glory.

"When I was young, I got in a fight with some stupid young men. They attempted to jump me. As they were running, one of them drove a knife into my leg." He points out the thick scar on his thigh. "These are also from tussels with men." He gestures to a spot on the back of his arm and one so close to his neck you feel the twist of your gut.

You finally kick off your own shoes and step out of the dress your in, standing as naked as your king. Turning around, you gesture to your back where one streaked down your spine messily. "That one is from where one of my brothers pushed me off an outcrop in Eren Luin. Carved my back up on the stone."

"And what of this one?" He asks, you feel him brush a knuckle over the top of an ass cheek. You twist to look.

"Huh. I don't remember having that one." You laugh. He chuckles too and you feel how close he is. You turn back towards him and take a swig from the bottle. He snakes it from your grasp to steal a drink. The way he's watching you has you shivering. He settles the bottle to the side and drops to the couch behind him. You gasp when he grabs one of your legs and drags it up on the couch beside him.

"This one?" He rumbles, brushing his hand over the inside of your calf where one ran the length of it.

"Dropped an unhappy cat, back claws caught on his way down." You try to ignore the exposure of your most intimate area as he gazes over you. But the thrill of Thorin leaning in to roll his tongue over it emboldened you.

"I have another you might want to see," his eyes raise to yours, mischief glittering in them. You drop that thigh and lift the other to his other side but turn it out more to expose the jagged one that stemmed away from the groin and down the thigh. His eyes hooded as he lifted an eyebrow. "I see, what incident befell you?" He murmured before leaning in to roll his tongue slowly up that leg.

You moaned, tilting your head back. "Fell from a tree and into an unforgiving bush." The words came breathy and soft as his tongue traveled inword more. You moaned louder when he licked the first swipe up the middle. Your hands tangled his hair as he spoiled you with his mouth.

"How unlucky," he mused.

"On the contratry," you sighed, "I think it very lucky." Thorin rumbled against you and pulled you down into his lap. You happily oblige and twist your hands around his neck.

"You'll have to tell me why that is." The king rumbles. It's your turn to make him moan though, and you're already lined up with him. He clenches his teeth as you sink down on him happily. He leans his head against your neck and shivers. Perhaps you should drink with him more often. It'd been a long time since you'd taken a lover but the stretch of it was delicious. The sear of pain mixed with the feeling of being filled to the hilt had you whimpering.

Thorin gripped the back of you neck with one hand and wrapped the other around your back. It crushed you together as he dragged you off him and then pulled you back down. You gripped him hard as the two of you rolled hips against each other.

Moans and grunts and gasps filled the air as you both rutted against each other. Sober you would never be able to be so bold with your king. You took what was offered, whimpering when he snatched a nipple up in his mouth.

All movements were rough and messy and you'd surely be sore tomorrow but that didn't matter. Not when your fingers were worshipping every scar on his body. That did the trick, he shivered and with a jerk and a low groan, he filled you. You rode him through his orgasm, slowing so his over sensative flesh wouldn't be forcing his body from yours. His face crumbled into a desperate look as he leaned into you. He was still hard as you rocked against him at a leisure pace. He leaned his head against your chest, groaning into you as he cups your waist, stroking whatever skin he could find.

You brushed his hair from his face as you slow to just settle against him. "Do you want rest first?"

"For just a moment." He replies, nuzzling you bosum sweetly. He was being so tender, it was a moment you'd never forget. Because he was slumping and snoring.

It was funnier to you than irratating. Poor drunk bastard, you laugh at him and slide off him. It makes him twitch as you lean him down to the couch. You carefully grab a blanket and pull it over him before snagging your clothes off the floor. The dribblings down your thighs was uncomfortable but your room wasn't far.

You'd speak to him tomorrow. Certainly when he wasn't so toasted. You peck his lips one time before slipping from his chambers and going for your bath.

You entered the dining hall late the following morning and smirked upon seeing the king. He looked ornary and tired and irrate, no doubt dragged from his bed long before you had risen.

His eyes raise to you and they widen. You can see the blush rising on his face as you approach where he's sat with Balin filling him in on official business. You throw him an amused smile and move toward the kitchens for whatever Bombur made for breakfast this morning.

Thorin eyes you when you sit by yourself instead of at his table. He's perking up, and ignoring Balin by the looks of it. Balin glances between you both, trailing off it would seem. Then smiles, knowingly.

"Y/N, won't you join us?" He asks.

The king simply raises an eyebrow to you in question so you grab you plate and move toward them. Thorin stares and stares and stares. "Sleep well, Thorin?" You chirp, amused at the shocked look he gave you.

"I don't recall when sleep took me."

You dig into the food of your plate with a grin, not bothered in the least by Balin's presence. He was a close friend and based off his face, he was already picking up on the context.

"You were pretty drunk."

"Aye. How did you sleep?"

"Well, after a bath." You give him a hard look that's ruined by how funny you find this. His cheeks tint again as he drops his face to his hand.

"I fell asleep on you." He murmurs.

"Mm," you hum taking a final bite and rising before you had cleared it. You'd finish your food in your work space while you began. "Correction, you fell asleep in me." Thorin and Balin gape at that comment. With that, you scoop up your plate.

"Oh, lad. You're in trouble," Balin calls.

"Tell you what, Thorin. You can make it up to me later if you're not too tired. Have a good day, Balin." Balin tips his head at you, laughing greatly and Thorin looked mortfied but he had full intentions of making it up to you the first moment he could.

[sohin-ace]

Jonathan - The Date

This is cross-posted from Wattpad and available on AO3.

Enjoy~

You and Jonathan were currently out in the city together. Your older sibling asked you to bring a list of groceries back home.

You naturally asked your boyfriend to come with you, and of course, he happily accepted to tag along.

So you were both on a shopping date, goofing around mostly, and almost forgetting half of what you were supposed to bring back.

Everything became instantly more pleasant and fun when Jonathan was with you. Even the most boring or troublesome of tasks became colorful and memorable when he came.

Right now, you completed half of your list and it was still fairly early, which was quite impressive for you.

"Let's go to the market, then we'll take a well deserved break at a café, what do you think?" You proposed as you started to get a little bit tired and hungry from walking all day.

"Sure, Y/N, let's go!"

You both entered the market place that was bustling with people. Expected since it was a Saturday morning. But the more you walked, the busier it became.

It started to be hard to walk side by side and, short as you were, Jonathan was scared to lose you in the crowd.

"Y/N take my hand!" he offered his huge hand to you and you grabbed it for dear life.

His hand was warm and comforting over yours. You tried to stay as close to him as possible. When it started to get too difficult to stay entertwined with the boy, Jonathan pulled you in front of him and wrapped one arm around you from behind, locking you against his strong chest.

You blushed at the bold move, but relaxed against him and you both walked through the mass of people way more efficiently.

When you finally arrived at the merchant you were looking for, you picked up what you needed, paid and put everything in your basket with a satisfied grin on your face.

"Here, it must be heavy, let me carry it for you." Jonathan proposed, like the proper gentleman that he was.

"O-oh it's fine Jojo, don't worry!" You reassured the male, but he still took the basket from your hands regardless of your protests and the merchant couldn't help their giggle.

"What a nice gallant young man you found yourself there, miss. I wish you two the best~."

You blushed a deep red at the remark and Jonathan thanked them with a big smile as you both went on your way.

"So Y/N, what would you like to eat? I'm so hungry I could eat anything, so you can choose whatever you'd like."

"Hmmm... Do you want to see my uncle's bakery? He makes the best sandwiches in the whole city!" Jonathan couldn't help but chuckle at how cute you were when your eyes lit up.

He loved how you were such a big foodie sometimes. Small as you were, at least compared to him, you sure liked to eat a lot, especially baked goods. And so you lead him eagerly by the arm towards your uncle's awaiting bakery.

You introduced Jonathan to your uncle and the interactions between them were pretty wholesome, you thought.

"Don't you dare hurt my niece or I'll come for ya, got it big boy?!" Jonathan nodded frantically, sweating bullets. "Good! Would you like some cheese bread? They're fresh outta' the oven!" He grinned towards the male, completely changing his tone and Jonathan deadpanned as you giggled.

You stayed inside the warm bakery and talked over some tea and eventually lost track of time. You quickly went out the shop to finish off your mission after eating and thanked your uncle.

"We're almost finished, Jojo, stay with me!" you tried to encourage your boyfriend whose soul was currently leaving his body.

He should have toned down on the cheese bread, but it was so delicious. He was so full he could barely walk now, how did you do it?

"Ughhh... Y/N, please... Slow down..." He groaned holding his full belly, like a pregnant woman.

A few more hours later you were finally done and you were both strolling back to where your car was waiting. You were tired from walking so much, but you were happy and satisfied.

"I had fun today, Jojo. Thank you for accompagnying me." You said gratefully, walking beside him at a slow, relaxed pace.

"Of course, anything for you, my Y/N. I had a great day too, let's date like this more often." He spoke with a soft look in his blue eyes and love laced in his voice.

Your heart skipped a beat and your face flushed. This boy made you melt with the simplest things. Too embarrassed to say anything, you hugged his arm and hid your face.

The dark haired male instantly moved his arm from your grasp to wrap it around you so you would hug his chest instead, which you did. He chuckled and you kept walking like this until you saw your coachman waiting down the street.

"Oh, Sebastian!" You waved at him and jogged towards the vehicle, as he must have been waiting for a while now.

Both you and Jonathan climbed in and you were finally on the way back home. Good thing you lived close to one another.

The sun was already setting down, leaving only its last golden rays shine through the twilit sky. The Joestar heir stared at the beautiful scenery, mesmerized, until he felt a weight on his shoulder.

He turned his head only to find you, fallen asleep on him. You must have been more tired than what you seemed.

He snaked his arm around your waist to secure you from the car's jerks, and went back to staring at the scenery.

He subconsciously brushed his fingers up and down your arm, thinking about how lucky he was to have such a cute, caring girlfriend when everyone else left him for his brother, Dio.

His train of thoughts was stopped when he saw your house in the distance. The coachman finally parked and stopped the horses.

"Milady L/N. We have arrived." He called out as he climbed down andopened the door, waiting for you to descend.

Jonathan then leaned over close to you and carressed your peaceful face with his knuckles.

"Hey Y/N wake up, we're home." He softly purred, effectively waking you up.

You opened your eyes to see the beautiful blue ones of your lover smiling at you. What a bliss it was, to see him first thing upon waking up. You rubbed your eyes and sat up straight groggily.

"Oh.. I fell asleep, how embarassing." You muttered hoarsely to yourself, but Jonathan definitely heard you and chuckled.

"It's okay my love," he cupped your cheeks and wiped the corner of your mouth with his thumb. "You can fall asleep all you want when I'm here."

You blushed and your breath hitched at his sweet words. You looked down and grabbed his hands before he ushered you to follow him. He got out and climbed down the tall carriage with no difficulty, then waited for you to help you down.

You gripped your frilly dress, careful not to stumble on it and descended one step, grabbing Jonathan's extended hand, but as soon as you did, your knees gave up on you and you lost balance.

"Aah!!" You yelped and Jonathan instantly caught you in his arms, wrapping them around your waist as you wrapped yours around his neck, holding onto him for dear life.

"Milady L/N! Are you alright?" Your coachman gasped with concern.

Jonathan gently held you there for a moment. He smiled at Sebastian, mouthing him that everything was okay and that he could go and the man sighed in relief, complying.

When you came down from your shock, you leaned away a bit to look down at Jonathan's face, who was looking right back at you and you gasped.

"J-jojo! I must be heavy! Put me down before you hurt your back!" He chuckled charmingly, fighting the urge to kiss your cute lips.

"Not at all, my darling, it's like holding a tiny cat."

You both giggled together and you leaned in to rub your nose against his in an eskimo-kiss. He blushed warmly at your gesture, which he found absolutely and insanely adorable, but was not exactly what he was hoping for.

Too shy to voice his desire, he coulf only stare at you lovingly when you leaned back, a beautiful smile gracing your face. He decided to put you back down onto the ground before your divine beauty so close to him could break him.

"Are you sure you are okay Y/N? You scared me right there." He asked as he held onto you tightly, scared you'd collapse again.

"I'm fine! Just a little dizzy haha!" You sheepishly laughed it off and scratched your cheek. "I must still be sleepy."

"Don't be so reckless when I'm not here, okay? What will I do if you get hurt?" He scolded you playfully and you showed him a surprised expression. How bold of him.

"Huh? You're one to talk! Mr. 'I-get-into-fights-with-anyone-especially-Dio'!"

He blushed and gasped loudly, offended by the truth, and you giggled at his defenseless reaction. Darn it, you were right!

You both walked slowly towards your house and his heart was beating faster and faster with each step. If he didn't do it now, he would regret it later.

He turned to face you and stopped in his tracks, taking a sudden breath. "...Please don't be upset by this."

You furrowed your brows in confusion. "By what?"

He didn't waste any more seconds and cupped your cheeks in his hands, leaning in for a chaste kiss, slow and lingering.

You melted into his delicate touch, you could tell he tried his best to be as gentle as possible, not wanting to be too rough and eager on you.

Your lips were so plush against his, and your scent was so addictive, he could only crave more of you. He was no enamored with you, there wasn't a single thing about you that wasn't absolutely delicious.

He reluctantly separated from you, scared to lose control if he kept it any longer.

"I'm sorry, I should have asked first, I just couldn't help it, I love you so much, it's hard to think straight..."

You smiled at his adorable shyness. You grabbed his hand and gently pressed your lips over the sensitive skin of his wrist. He shuddered and you looked back at him with hooded eyes.

"I'm yours, Jojo. You don't have to ask for anything, you can do whatever you want with me." You said kindly, but his face exploded in a crimson shade, taking your words the wrong way.

"Nooo no no Y/N! Don't say things like that!!" He gasped and put his hands on your shoulders as your eyes widened. "I may be nice but... I am still a man! Be careful with what you say!" He yelped in panick as you didn't seem to even realize what you were saying.

"Wha- but it's okay! I never ask you for permission when I touch you! So you can too..." You said as a matter of fact and he tried to argue without saying anything too brutal for your innocent mind.

"B-but... It's not the same! And you are a girl! Don't offer yourself so recklessly!" He shook his head vigorously. "And be careful around men, alright?"

Confused at his sudden worry you patted his cheek and smiled. "You are the only man I see anyway, so don't worry."

He sighed in relief and decided to end the conversation there. "Come here."

He opened his strong arms out to you and you wrapped your smaller ones around him, both appreciating each other's warmth.

"Thank you again for the date, Jojo."

He only squeezed you tighter in response.

Jonathan  🤝🏼 Abdul

Saving your girlfriend in the crowd.

[zoessecretjournal]

Monday, April 19th, 2021

Today was a great day! I didn’t sleep so well despite the full on beach day we had the day before. It was Taylor’s last day here, unfortunately we really only got to say goodbye today as I was leaving at 11am this morning to meet up with Ryan. I let her sleep in my bed and she gave a groggy goodbye as my Lyft approached the apt. On the way to Ryan’s I listened to Shygirl and started out the window, trying to stay cool. It was the first time I would see him since all of our serious talks, and he had been spending the weekend trying to help Kathleen get to LAX (she mixed up the dates apparently) so I expected him to be tired. I got there around 11:30 am, dressed in my chartreuse green baby doll dress with a white soft tee underneath. My gold earrings, white tennis shoes and gold lobster broach as accessories, and a natural style face. When he came to collect me from outside he certainly looked tired, but happy to see me. When inside, he complimented the color of my dress and drew in to kiss me, and then he held me for a long while. He genuinely gives really good and meaningful hugs.

As soon as I sit down on the couch he plops his head on my lap, wanting me to scratch his head. I tell him he’s just like a cat and he gives me a look to suggest “so?” in a cute way. Whenever I scratch his head, he always ends up doing it to me at the same time, as well as using his other free hand to hold mine or touch me in some way. We stay this way, catching long gazes at each other intermittently, for about half an hour. He asks me about my Hinge profile and how I must have a line of suitors. I tell him about my date with Daniel and how cringe it was, but not before he asked if I kissed him!!! I lie and say no, because I never wanted to really kiss Daniel in the first place. We have fun reveling in how basic Daniel is, and then Ryan proceeds to tell me about his coffee date with someone this week with someone from Hinge. Apparently she is also “ethically non-monogamous” and only wants to make friends. Whatever.

Then we decide to walk to his car to head off to the LACMA. Ryan shows me how they just laid out new tar on his street and someone had ruined it by driving on it, he really isn’t happy about it apparently. I honestly don’t really understand the big idea, but maybe I would care if I drove. On the way to his car he is of course quiet and a really slow walker, I feel like I fumble all the time trying to keep his pace while traversing the uprooted side walks of East Hollywood. Ryan thought he got a ticket as we were walking to his car and my stomach dropped, knowing how much that has effected other people I’ve dated in the past. Thankfully it ended up just being a “thank you” note from someone he helped get a spot behind his car. I could breath a sigh of relief, honestly. On the way there he held my hand, put his hand on my though, squeezed my fingers while catching my glance a few times. He doesn’t talk much in the car and I’m learning he really shows that he cares in a lot of non-verbal cues, which is so different from the Ryan I knew as a friend.

At the muesuem, Ryan gets a iced espresso before we get in. The place was pretty empty and we weren’t in a rush, it was a nice change of pace to be outside with him somewhere in the day time. Ryan took a second picture of me (The first was while i was sitting on his couch) in front of the dome next to the LACMA. Both were prompted by him, which made me feel pretty good. During the Nara exhibit, I found that I was much more talkative, I actually expected him to make jokes about more of the art but there were none! He didn’t even laugh at some of the funny ones! I respected his approach though, very contemplative. There were some really beautiful pieces, and I take a long while to stop and stare at everything. I really appreciated his patience and how he kept pace with me, he was interested in seeing it all with me.  The big paintings of Nara’s work were pretty amazing to see up close. I’ve seen a lot of this work in art books, but those photographs and scans can never capture the way the skin of the character’s look in person. They literally look alive, you see all the blue, pink and yellow hues that make a breathing person, but with this simple illustrated, petulant face. The eyes were also a kaleidoscope of colors, his techniques I've tried to commit to memory. especially the white dot technique.

After the exhibition Ryan thanks me for inviting him, saying no one ever invites him to things like this or things in the day time. I ask why he thought that was? He replied “I don’t know, covid?” and then he sings “or maybe I’m secretly cancelled!”. I wish I would of said this at the time, but I suspect it’s because he’s sober, and I hope that doesn't happen to me. He asks if I am hungry, and I say that I am, he suggests Korean BBQ by his place, to which I agree. We drove down 6th st which apparently he had never gone down and he remarked on how beautiful it was, it certainly was, I had missed it. We still hold hands, and even tighter this time as we make our way to K-Town. We both order the Bulgogi and while we wait for our take-out order Ryan discusses with me his thoughts on the exhibit. He spoke about how long Nara had been an artist and expected to do the same style over and over because it’s what sells and rarely to those artists get to do other stuff. He then started relaying it to his own work and how dispensable art is and how we just eat content like McDonald’s. I agree with him, I explained how I felt disenfranchised for those reasons as well. We get our food eventually and head back to his apt. On the way back from the car, Ryan makes a few stories on people leaving bagged dog shit in random places in his neighborhood. He doesn’t have a lot of shame when it comes to his musings in comedy. A quality I both admire and am fearful of. When we get inside I take off my shoes and spruce up a little. We eat in his kitchen next to his two open windows with the honey suckle veranda directly outside. We both had a non-alcoholic beer with our meal which was surprisingly good.  I can’t remember much about what we talked about, I think we just were eating and played footsie a little bit.

He invited me to lay down with him in his room after we were done, so I followed him there. We laid down for some moments, very close and comfortable.I was caressing him all over, I genuinely like to do that with my partners, but specifically Ryan, hes very receptive to touch. We end up kissing and he stops and asks me if I really want to do “this” and I tell him I do. We end up having sex twice, both times Ryan tries hard to focus on me cumming. I don’t but I think he thinks I did the 2nd time. For some reason I’m having a hard time with that, and also getting wet, but I still had a great time (I was really close though) . We felt closer some how, less stress involved. I even fell asleep with his head in my chest. When he woke up, he woke me up. He caressed my neck and grabbed my face to look at it, my eyes still half-way closed. He gets up to go take a bath and I slowly come to and retrieve my phone and go sit in the kitchen next to the open window. I respond to everyone I can, Matt (from Hinge, who I met yesterday at the bonfire) had messaged me to tell me he was free all week, and he was making carbonara if I wanted to stop by. I think I’m going to see him tomorrow.

When Ryan gets out of the Bath and dressed (in a matching green playstation shirt might I add) he puts on a podcast, gets a sparkling water and lays down on the couch. I assume, no room for me, so he wanted to be alone. He was quite quiet as well again. So I decide to purchase somethings from amazon (sewing machine, humidifier, etc) and when I finally put my phone down I look over at Ryan and he was looking at me. He immediately puts his arms up to say “Come here”. As I approach he says that I can lay on him any way I like, face up, down etc, and so I lay down on him stomach down so I can still see him, and he starts to massage my shoulders. We listen to this podcast for awhile like that, and talk about random things relating to it. at some point they get onto the topic of Randonautica, in which I explain to Ryan, who had never heard of it, what it was all about. As I’m explaining it, he downloads the app! I had dared him to do it, but he actually was really interested. Funnily enough, the pin it dropped was right in between his ex-gf’s apt (Dani) and his good friend Shawn’s apt (Who they both date apparently) which really freaked him out. But just as he got the pin, his friend Shawn messaged him on facebook! He looks at me bewildered and asks if I want to meet his friend Shawn and go check out the pin and I agree. I had expected to sleep over but felt instantly rejected, but realized we had spent a lot of close time together so I should just deal with my feelings right then and there. Ryan gets my attention and re-assures me it’s just because he hasn’t had much space the past few days and he had a really lovely day with me. His serious tone made me feel better and I assured him that I was ok.

Before we head out I ask if we can take a Polaroid together, unfortunately both times they are incredibly blown out. He lets me borrow a jacket of his, even though I just gave him back his sweater and we head off. I tell him that I have a bunch of mushrooms I’ve been waiting to take and ask him if the next time we hang out if we could do them/he could babysit me and he enthusiastically agrees. Even though I tell him I am quite the handful on them in large doses, he had a look of reassurance that he can handle it. We’ll see.

We arrive in the area and walk to the pin, Ryan points out where Dani lives as we pass by. The pin was behind a residential gate with an old mustang stored in it, with both its hood and trunk open and a shovel up against it. Ryan tells me his “intention” he set for it was for us to see a UFO, which there was none. But we did see a cardboard cutout of Vegeta from Dragon Ball Z, so I guess him being an alien is close enough. We walk to his friend’s house, which Ryan had the access code memorized, they must be very close. Shaun and his friend seemed to be working on something music oriented for a game as we walked in, Shaun was very nice and welcoming. We end up talking for awhile and he offered me a Kombucha, Ryan seemed to really enjoy himself and liked that I got along so well. We hung out probably for about half an hour and then decided to head out so Ryan could take me home. He asks me how I’m doing and I say that I am having a really nice time, and he looked really happy about that and confirmed he was too.

On the ride back he had his hand on my thigh and I had my hands on his hand and the back of his neck, giving him a light massage while we listened to the tail end of that podcast. When we get to my place he tells me I should borrow his jacket again, that it looks nice. I tell him that I’m going to be busy all week but we will see each other soon, he tells me he is also going to be pretty busy. He reiterates what a great time he had that day and gives me a deep kiss and a long hug. We part ways and I arrive back home to tell Johnny some of the snippets of today while I respond to all my messages on my phone. I ate sushi and got ready for bed. Ryan texts me a bit in the evening, telling me again! how nice today was and what he was up to. It felt really easy and nice.

[blindrapture]

a union-mandated break post

(okay, let’s see if I can type this all over again after losing the post. gotta remember how it all went.)

Hey there, the few mutuals who Like all of my posts, the lurkers who occasionally make their presence known, the lurkers who I also hope are there, and all you folks who come across this post naturally before scrolling on (that’s fine too, please have a nice day! remember to take a deep breath and unclench!). I wanted to make a post giving a casual update.

Things have been going. You know how it is. Time proceeds onwards at a pace that is a crawl to some and fleeting to others, depending on relative perspective. The average of all these observations may be Objective Truth, a hazy mythical and abstract prospect which to this day no living human has ever known (due to the nature of perspective). We still try to know it for some reason, an endeavour which may be “a good thing” or “a condemnation of our species,” but that’s relative too. See above. Still, it is possible to take an approximation of what we figure this average to be and find ourselves (mis)balanced on a knife-edge in between all perspectives. This narrow path, the knife-edge between fast and slow, between good and bad, between ecstasy and despair, seems precarious at times, yet at other times is like a garden, wide and spacious enough to sit awhile. Our perspectives cover this garden from us with the shrubbery of Can’ts and Shouldn’ts, and the way to the garden is fraught with the misty cloud of Look-Like. And yet, ultimately, these shrubs and mists are but prismatic scenery colouring our time on this Earth, a perspective which is easy to see from within the garden. The Earth is brown and grey and immortal, though wearing an impermanent coat of blue and green. One day, we will slip out of our perspectives and return to the Earth, join her mounding’s mass, and that will be death.

So that’s the weather. Sometimes cold, sometimes mild, sometimes wet, sometimes dry, sometimes bothersome and sometimes the only backdrop I could ever want. I’ve been up to the usual, cycling between interests like a bat between haunts.

- The other day I got around to playing Smile For Me, an experience which took me about three hours to more-or-less complete 100%. Really cute game, I fell in love with all the characters, and the budding horror elements made me excited to see where it’d go.

- Currently I’m playing A Monster’s Expedition Through Puzzling Exhibitions, a game often cited in the same breath as Baba Is You and Stephen’s Sausage Roll. I think those two games are puzzle masterpieces, and A Monster’s Expedition is hitting me in the right spot. It frequently fills me with awe, which is impressive considering the game is just a long series of oblong block-pushing puzzles. It has scope, though, and it has the guts to hide that scope from you until you’re able to discover it for yourself. I’ve played for about 10 hours so far, beaten over 200 islands, and yet I feel I’m only getting further away from the end goal. Hard to describe. It’s a good game.

- When I’m done with that game, next I’ll be checking out Spelunky 2. I’ve wanted to try the original for a long time but never got around to it; I picked up the sequel. I know very little about the games (with a rough idea of what gameplay is like), and I intend to keep it that way for as long as I can. I like games that rely on discovery.

- Book-wise, I’m, y’know, reading Finnegans Wake as I fall asleep, occasionally inching through other books too, but my main reading focus at the moment is The Familiar. I went and picked up a new copy of Volume 5, and I found the Volume 3 I had kinda lost for a while, so now I have the full Season 1 again. And it’s been long enough since I read any of them that it’s finally time to reread them. As a unit this time. I am... so happy to be in their headspace. I’m currently in the second act of Volume 1, taking in a lot more details this time (and I do still remember a sense of where the whole plot goes), really cherishing the commitment to physicality and aesthetic. There’s not many authors out there like Danielewski. House of Leaves kickstarted my book obsession, y’know. And The Familiar is about as grand as a project can be. It’s supposed to be 27 volumes, each one 900 pages long, and the design of these books is goddamn sublime. The publisher only let him do the first 5 volumes, which is sad, but luckily those 5 volumes make up a “Season,” so they’re still a whole thing, a complete story arc for each of the nine protagonists, and plenty of secrets and details that give a good sense of the true scope. And did I mention the series is fucking scary? Profoundly so, each new volume weaving you deeper into its conspiratorial web of eldritch coincidences and patterns. The story is full of cats, immortal cats, God-cats. There’s a scientist who keeps a freaky magic orb and is known as Wizard. There’s an Armenian taxi driver who’s one of my favourite characters. And you can probably get all the volumes Used for fairly cheap on Amazon now. ........please, somebody join me in loving this series.

- Creative-wise, I’m working on music as always, putting notes next to each other until I get a result I can do something with. There is one piece that’s definitely done, a collaboration between Lindsay and I, but it’s going into Nine Is God so you won’t hear it just yet. Speaking of, that’s coming along. I haven’t even started making any codes or cool connections yet; I want to finish the... Core of this update first. Let’s be deceptive and call it the Main Blog. I have proven to myself that I definitely can do this; I keep stumbling on new mechanisms I can add, and I have a pretty vivid idea of what the whole thing will look like. It’s gonna be maybe a decent size for a Blog, all told, but it’s the form of the thing that mandates a lot of care. Luckily I have made Viceking’s Graab, so this isn’t the first time I’ve done something this mechanically ambitious. ...look, just. Of course I’m excited to Actually Talk about this thing, but like with the Graab, its nature requires me to keep it secret until players finally discover it for themselves. I like making that kind of thing, I want the sense of discovery, of climbing up a hill only to reach the summit and see an even bigger mountain looming over you that you hadn’t realized was there. Like Frog Fractions, or its sequel, even if you know there will be more than meets the eye you still get surprised and filled with delight. This concept fits neatly into an ARG format.

- Oh, also, I’m super excited for the Braid remake. It’s gonna have a comically thorough amount of developer commentary, and that’s all I want from this world. It’s even coming to Switch!

Media can be used as a tool to assist with the experience of life, and that is the way I want to approach things. I have spent time adapting myself to feel comfortable in these boring aesthetics (of understated puzzle games, thoughtful pretty books, blogs as art) because this means I am less susceptible to getting burned out during contemplation and self-examination. It may seem like a matter of taste, but taste is relative too; it’s not hard-wired, it can be adjusted, it does adjust all the time under the hood. ...I don’t know where to go with this one, other than that I should be careful not to condescend. I am not above anyone, I am confused too. I just.. like confusion and mazes, and I try to speak these aesthetics in an approximation of how I see others talk about theirs.

Right. I think that’s the bulk of it, that’s what I wanted to say today. I hope you are holding on, reader. It’s a wild and lonely world out there, and it’s our world; it’s yours just as much as it’s anyone else’s. You are important to it.

I leave you, mysteriously, with an old Genesis song. It’s called “Can-Utility and the Coastliners,” which is a silly way of saying it’s a song about the myth of King Canute. Sick of flatterers claiming he was equal to God, he went to the sea shore and said “If I truly am equal to God, then let the waves halt at my feet!” They didn’t. An astute demonstration, but it just prompted his flatterers to praise his ingenuity. “But he forced a smile, even though his hopes lay dashed where offerings fell.” I’m not really sure how the story ends. But it’s a wonderful song, starts off very folks-y but quickly takes a left turn down Mystery and Beauty. And it’s freaking Genesis.

See ya.

[thestartline]

NYLON JAPAN February Issue - Stray Kids Eng Trans

NYLON JAPAN February Issue - Stray Kids Eng Trans

The world based Stray Kids has appeared for the first time!

At the start of the year, I read a fortune telling column on some magazine, that I’ll have a new encounter during the latter half of the year. The new counter in the latter half of 2019 was with Stray Kids, and the fortune telling was true. The shock I had when I first saw Stray Kids. Their fluid but powerful dancing, vocals that captured anyone who listened to them, and their rap performance as goo as any hip hop artist. Anyone who sees their stage will for sure be captivated by them. For the first time, Stray Kids have appeared solo on a Japanese magazine, and on the cover of NYLON guys. After their debut in Korea in 2018, they quickly went on a very successful world tour, showcasing their popularity and significance not only within Asia but all over the world. They have finally announced their long awaited Japanese debut in March of 2020. As for a boy group which is world based, this might be something normal. We will introduce Stray Kids who will surely become the icon of all boys group, through their fortune tellings and special photoshoot by NYLON JAPAN.

Lee Know

Known for his powerful and flexible dance. From his beautiful sculpted face, he is named the “Dancing Gem” by the fans. From Korea. 

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Lee Know

The year which will determine which direction to go forward to. Your surroundings might be surprised by your decisions in March. Your childish side will need to be toned down. There may be a possibility that you’ll wish to pursue something on the world level in August. Need to be cautious of your responsible nature and how you may try too hard at times. On your own pace, have fun both personally and officially!

Changbin

A skillful rapper known for his dark voice. Also highly regarded for his lyric writing. Often teased within the group. From Korea. 

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Changbin 

Your heart will be filled with happiness in 2020. During the winter, you will be concerned with your surroundings more than yourself which might be troubling, but by April, you will find a peaceful solution. From May will be a time to learn, and there will be more areas which will need to be understood. By September, you may possibly try something new! If you feel stuck, try relying on I.N.!

Hyunjin

With his sweet face, he is a visual that everyone admits. A dancer that leads Stray Kids. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Hyunjin

Anyone who sees you will understand its a happy year for you. If there is anything you wish to try, try saying it out loud! If it is accepted, April may become a fun month for you to delve into it. June and July may be a little challenging, but from August onwards, you will be once again surrounded by everything you love.

I.N.

The youngest in the member in charge of vocals. A natural airhead that is loved by the members. His dimples when he laughs is his charming point. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> I.N.

Your life will become richer, and you will step into something new. Early in the new year, a big offer might come your way, signaling your luck. During the spring, you will be strapped to something with history and order but think of it as a learning period! By September, you will be someone who is highly regarded. Your free spirit will always be by your side. 

Han

In charge of rap but also a skilled vocalist; an all rounder. Part of “3RACHA” along with Bang Chan and Changbin. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Han

A year which you might have a lot of responsible jobs coming your way, but always remember that you will be one smiling at the end. From January, you might be caught up on the past, but your goal is April! You will have new ties in surprising places, and if you want to be acknowledged, set your goal for September and you will succeed.

Bang Chan

The leader of Stray Kids and the brain of the group. In charge of writing lyrics and songs as well as producing. From Australia.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Bang Chan

2020 is a year that might change things dramatically. From the start of the year to March, you will be able to rest. If you are sensitive to your surroundings, many new supporters will appear and you will have a strong wind to push you through in June. On the other hand, by September, you might possibly change tracks and be greatly successful. Your heart will be delicate so you will need the support of your members. 

Seungmin

Mostly in charge of vocals. His skills earned him second place in his companies audition. Also speaks English well, and is an intelligent character. From Korea.

Fortune SKZ 2020 >> Seungmin

The hobbies and fun things you are absorbed in might become part of work for you, a lucky sign. From January, your luck with personal relations seem great as well. By spring, captivating job offers will come your way. In August, some difficult things might occur, but if you believe it is a chance for you to step up and endure it, you will be able to uncover a new self that you didn’t know about. 

Felix

With his cute visuals, but extreme deep voice, he is well known for his gap. Pay attention to his sexy rap and sharp dance moves! From Australia.

Fortune SKZ2020 >> Felix

Both personally and officially, you will be happy. Be generous to yourself! There will be a lot of changes in January, but March and April will bring new chances and allow you get on board. You might be able to reach for something you have always been dreaming about in August. Be sensible in November to not be scolded at. 

In the cold and brisk breeze, reminding me of winter’s arrival, I met Stray Kids in Seoul, Korea. They entered the set still looking sleepy. During the waiting times, they played with the cats on set, or teased each other, showing the natural sides of the group, the average age of the members being 19 years old. Different to the powerful faces they have on stage, another reason as to why they are popular. A little different to their normal styles, with the colourful outfits and ennui concept. Feel their first story through NYLON JAPAN.

Q. Firstly, please tell us how you feel about today’s shoot.

Bang Chan: As it is our first appearance on NYLON JAPAN, we are very honoured just by that. It has created a new precious memory for me. 

Lee Know: Today’s set is a famous shooting area! I have always wanted to come here, so I am very happy to be here on such wonderful opportunity.

Changbin: It is a derelict amusement park, and it was great to be able to shoot in the unique atmosphere. I was able to have fun by feeling like I was back in my childhood.

Hyunjin: From the styling, it had a different feeling to our other photoshoots. Personally, I had a lot of fun as the costumes were different to usual styles. 

Han: It’s been a while since we had a location shooting! As it is surrounded by mountains and trees, the air was good and I had a great time from the morning. 

Felix: As we began filming from the morning, I felt refreshed and because we were with the members, I had a great time!

Seungmin: I have actually seen a Japanese photo book before, and it was interesting because I was wearing something similar as to what the model was wearing in the photo book. There were many cats in the set, and it was really funny to see Lee Know taking care of the cats because he seemed like a butler.

I.N.: The shoot was fun, but because I heard it was the ruins of an old amusement park, I was a little scared at first. However, the air was nice and I was able to shoot with a good feeling. 

Q. You wore outfits with a lot of colours today, but do you have any styles you are liking recently?

BC: Always black! I think its my colour. All black fashion, I usually like to wear monotone looks. 

LK: I actually am not really interested in fashion... I used to think about it before, but these days I like to wear whatever is most comfortable.

CB: As winter is approaching, I want to wear things that make me seem softer, or things that are large and relaxed styles. 

HJ: I usually wear cute sweats, hoodie t-shirts, and big sweatpants so I think I’ll like to wear warmer things for the winter. 

FX: Its getting quite cold recently, so I like wearing a fur hood outer these days! I like to feel the warmth from my outers. 

HN: I don’t really prefer any fashion styles, but my style is quite showy compared to the others. The costume I wore today was colourful and I liked it, I want to keep trying lots of styles.

SM: I often like to wear long padding downs, long coats, trench coats, and long outers in general. Coats that go to my knees are warm and I like them. I was happy because my costume for today was a long coast as well. Its my style!

IN: I’m interested in street fashion these days, I used to like clothes that fitted my body, these days I like wearing wide pants, kind of like a newtro (new and retro) style.

Q. What is your favourite (pop) culture?

BC: I have always liked games, but recently, I’ve been busy and haven’t been able to do it much. But whenever I have a little time, I always want to do it... its a stress reliever for me!

LK: I watch a lot of films. Recently, I watched a film released in 2003 called “A Tale of Two Sisters” with Han. It was a horror film, but it was really great!

CB: I’m into music and YouTube. I’ve been listening to senior Kpop artists such as TVXQ and Super Junior, groups I was into when I was younger. On YouTube, I watch funny contents with fresh ideas.

HJ: I’m really into an artist called “Leellamarz” these days, I’ve only been listening to them. I have always been the type to only focus on one thing when I’m into it. 

HN: I like band music, so I’ve been listening to “One Ok Rock”, and recently, I’ve been listening to an English band called “Young Blood”. It’s great.

SM: Listening to band music is a hobby of mine. After listening to DAY6 senior’s songs, I listen to a lot of rock bands these days. It’s great fun to listen to the vocals, keyboard, and bass individually. I don’t know many bands so I’m still learning. The band I began to like recently is “Green Day”. I think their music is fun and good. (Bang Chan began to sing Green Day) If I’m ever going to play any instruments, I want to try the melody parts like the guitar, keyboard, or piano!

IN: Rather than watching movies, I like reading reviews other people wrote. I like to compare my own thoughts to how other people found it. I look for many reviews and enjoy reading them.

Q. Then we’ll move onto questions about music. Unlike other groups, Stray Kids can self produce their songs which is a strength, but is there anything you pay attention to or focus on?

BC: We create our own songs and weave it into the concept, making a performance. And, I think it is the most important part about self producing is to definitely put our message into our songs. We believe it is our strength to be able to tell our message from the bottom of our hearts, and Stray Kids cannot exist without that, which is our self producing. 

HN: As Bang Chan said, we like to make songs that our fans can understand, but what we focus on is having others relate to us. We try to incorporate all the feelings, anxiety, and experiences that people our age might feel into our lyrics, and we really try to have other people relate to us. 

Q. What do you think are the problems of the people in their 10′s have?

HN: There are a lot of young people now that don’t know what to do with themselves now, right? They are facing who they are on the insides, but they aren’t sure. So, I focus on putting in the feelings of not knowing what to do, or not knowing which way is the right way in the lyrics.

Q. Next, I’ll ask a question your beauty. Please tell us the secrets on how you stay good looking all the time

HN: Honestly... I was born good looking so... hahaha! There isn’t anything. Next, fashionista Changbin!

CB: I think its better if you don’t stress if you want a nice or gentle look. Its important to think positively all the time!

BC: To take in nutritional food once every day! There’s no point if your body isn’t healthy!

SM: Rather than being good looking, I think it is important to keep in mind the feelings I had towards music when I started as a Stray Kids member. A straightforward heart!

FX: When I’m on stage playing with the members or performing, or when I am communicating with the fans, I think thats when we look the best.

HJ: Isn’t how good we look on stage the true style for us? Even when we make a little mistake during practise, we practise until we go on stage and make sure the outcome is a 100%. We can accomplish that because we try that hard. We heighten ourselves to the best version of ourselves, and as professionals, we showcase the perfect version on stage. I believe that is how Stray Kids maintain our good looks, 

LK: I used to go on diets and care about how I look on the outside, but now I’m focusing on who I am, trying to face my own heart. 

IN: Who I am on camera and off camera, me on stage and off stage, I try to make sure its all the same me. My definition of good looking is whoever that can be truly who they are, wherever they are. I always try to maintain that mindset!

Q. Okay, so how you maintain your good looks differs. How about a easier question now - please tell us anything that you specifically focus on in terms of eating habits

HJ: I always make sure if there are no eggplants in my meals! I really don’t like eggplants. The members always try to make me eat eggplants, so sometimes I eat them without noticing. 

BC: There is something that I specifically focus on. It’s table manners. To not make noise when I’m eating, if I blow my nose I make sure I won’t trouble the people around me. It’s also important to chew a lot during meals, so I try to chew a lot.

SM: I don’t eat dinner the day before a shoot. Instead, I eat everything I want to eat for breakfast and lunch! I’m the type to lose weight if I don’t eat, so I make sure of how much I eat the day before. 

HN: On off days, there are days where I don’t eat properly, but I have decided to eat something I really want to eat deliciously once a day! Within the group, I don’t have a lot of likes and dislikes, and I think I eat a lot. Even if I bloat the next day, there’s no point if I have no strength! Really, its an excuse though haha.

FX: I’m starting to like eating spicy foods! But, when I eat spicy foods, my body doesn’t handle it too well. I get stomach aches. Days before I have schedules, I refrain from eating spicy foods.

IN: I don’t snack at night! I really bloat easily.

Members: Han is a night snacker, so I.N. always says he’s envious of him!

IN: When I began snacking at night, I can’t stop. I eat the next night too... I can’t stop myself. So I made a promise with myself to stop. I allow myself to snack at night about twice a month!

BC: I try not to snack at night, but I usually can’t help myself and end up eating.

LK: To work out, I’ve been taking a lot of protein lately. I eat whatever I want to eat and take in proteins. I heard about green tea diet before and I was drinking Green Tea frappuccino but it was no use... But, salad and hamburger is good for dieting. Because its filled with carbs, proteins and vitamins, right?

Members: That’s Lee Know’s excuse!

CB: I should take care of what I eat, but I don’t. There is one thing I do focus on, though. I don’t eat cold food and cold drinks. Cold food isn’t good for the body... But, if there are only cold food, I warm it up in my mouth before I drink it in. It’s good for digestion too.

Q. The key content for this month is “fortune telling”, but have any of you had your fortune told before?

LK, HN, IN: We have!

Nylon: Did you believe the results from those fortune tellings?

IN: I was told 2015 won’t be a good year, but 2016 will be better...

HN: At that time, I.N. and I were part of a project. We went to a fortune telling together, and we were told “August will not be a great month” and August was really crazy. I was scolded all the time! Even the smallest things I was scolded for... I should only look at the positive things from a fortune telling, haha!

LK: I was told that my luck will go up when I’m around 30... 

Members: Hahaha! How many more years do you have to wait?

IN: I actually don’t believe in fortune tellings. My parents went to a fortune teller before, and the fortune teller told them their son will either become a judge or a prosecutor. Thats why I didn’t believe in it... but, when I went with Han when I was a trainee, I thought fortune tellings are quite nice, so now I believe in half of it? 

Q. A lot of the readers of NYLON JAPAN are people who treasure their individuality. Please give an advice or message to those who have dreams and ambitions. 

IN: Don’t care about what other’s say about your individuality, and work on your own pace!

BC: There probably are people around you that accept your individuality, and people who relates to you and became your friends. I think it is important to be able to push on for what you enjoy. 

HN: I want the people to talk about how happy and blessed they are. Even having a dream is a big part of happiness. I hope your dreams will come true!

Q. The theme for NYLON JAPAN’s 15th anniversary is “NEW POWER NO BORDER”, but is there anything of this that you relate to?

FX: NEW POWER NO BORDER! (in his native accent)

BC: We always say our greeting by saying “STEP OUT!”. This “step out” means “stepping out of the borders”. With our own style, and our own music, we want to step out of the borders! This “Border” means “border” right? That’s something I relate to. 

Q. What do you want to tell the youths?

HN: There are people with dreams and people without dreams. Those who have dreams may stumble at some moments, and hard times may come along. But, if you can get over those hard times, your dreams will definitely be accomplished. For those who do not have dreams, don’t worry and look at who you are carefully. It’s not late when you find interest in something new, and I hope you’d be able to have some space for that in your heart. “Those who are talented cannot surpass those who try, and those who try cannot surpass those who have fun.” Even at the hardest times, trying your best won’t backstab you, and whatever you are doing, having fun is the best. I really want to tell them those words!

BC: It’s a little simple, but “Just enjoy!” Even at difficult situations, I think the winners are those who stay laughing. If you can have fun, good times will come. You’re still young, and life is long so “carpe diem” !

IN: Even if you can’t see the future, don’t worry about not being able to see, and it’ll be good if you focus on where you are now. 

Members: Those are words for us too

Q. Within your busy schedules, what stimulates you?

LK: This is obvious, but STAY’s are a biggest motivation! This is a fact!

BC: We’re really busy and there are so many things to get done, but interestingly, when I’m talking to the members, I think “maybe the future is bright?”. I feel like I don’t have to worry. The members help me. The existence of a group is good for the energy too. We can take care of each other and stimulate each other!

Q. I didn’t think you’d enjoy this as much. Now, the interview has come to an end. Lastly, you announced your Japan debut! Please tell us how you are feeling about your Japan debut

BC: It has been about a year and a half since we debuted as Stray Kids in Korea, but we are “debuting again” in Japan, which is a new feeling. Everything is new and exciting! We really can’t wait for our Japan debut! We’re all very motivated! Fighting!

Japanese to English Translation by @yarn1003 (skz acc on twit)

!! Please give credit when reposting !!

[whattodowithkpop]

Good Cops (Donghun)

Title: Good Cops

Pairing: Donghun x Reader

Genre: Slight Romance

Word Count: 3.5K Words

Writer: Kpopmadness

As the Monday train rolls down the tracks I keep my eyes out the window. Blocking out the busy noise of Korea that morning. I let out a soft sigh and feel slightly drowsy. My normal time for getting up for work to be down at the station was 5 AM sharp.

Being a cop in Korea wasn't easy, but it was what i loved doing. I had worked hard to be in the position i was in and to get the jobs i did on the force. But even though i loved my job, i had learned six months ago that this job comes at a price sometimes. I press my palms into my eyes, willing the images of blood staining my hands away from my mind. I tried to force my mind to focus on something else. Like the fact that i was getting a new partner today.

I willed a smile onto my face. I had put in an application form for a K9 Unit about two months ago. Demands for the well trained dogs was high. So i knew i would be waiting awhile. But last night before heading home my chief had said my new partner was coming in today.

The train comes to a stop and i stand up to leave. From the train i had to walk a few blocks to reach the station, which i didn't mind. The fall air was cool and refreshing as i made my way to the station. The walk and the air combined gave my mind a sense of clarity as excitement filled me for the days events.

The station was quiet once i made my way inside. Everyone was still waking up or trying to get dressed for the day. I enjoyed the silence while it lasted while i went to my locker and changed into my navy blue uniform.

I had just finished pulling my hair into a tight bun when I hear a soft tap at the locker room door,

“Come in.” I call, putting my old clothes into my duffle bag for later.

The chief of the station pokes his head into the locker room. He’s a middle aged man with black hair and thick rimmed classes. His lanky body is covered by the same navy blue uniform all of us wore, except the lines in his face showed the stress of serving on the force for many years.

“Your partner is here, Sargent.” He tells me, a warm smile on his face.

A wide smile blooms on my face and I quickly shut my locker door. “Really?” I ask, my voice a little too high pitched and excited.

The chief laughs and opens the door wider for me to get through, “Come see for yourself, kid.”

I eagerly follow him out the door almost bouncing up and down with excitement. I secretly hope the K9 is either a German shepherd or a pit bull, but at this point I’ll be happy with any K9-Unit.

The chief opens the door to his office and I quickly scan the room. A man with dark hair and big brown eyes stares back at me with a wide smile on his face. I quickly realize I won’t be getting a dog after all.

“Hi, I’m Lee Donghun.” The man says excitedly, his head bowing low before stretching out his hand for me to shake.

My eyes dart to my chief and then back to the man with his hand out toward me. I quickly take the chief by the wrist and pull him outside the office, shutting the door behind us. Leaving Donghun alone feeling confused.

“That is not a dog.” I snap, more than a little annoyed.

The chief chuckled softly, “I know.”

“Chief, I told you I didn’t want another partner. Not like that.” I complain.

“I know.” He says. “But you’re one of the best female Sargent’s here. And you can’t avoid having a real partner forever. Besides, he’s young and a rookie. You would make a good teacher.”

I let out a groan and hide my face in my hands. Frustrated that this was even happening. But deep down, I felt like I knew it was going to happen one day.

“Give him two weeks, kid.” The chief says gently, “See if you like him or not. If not, I’ll get you your K9 and he’ll move to another partner. Then we’ll all be happy.”

I sigh and give a slow nod. The chief smiles broadly, clearly happy with himself. I open the door to his office again, Donghun still stands in the same place he was moments ago picking at a loose strand on his pants nervously.

“Come on,” I say, motioning with my head for him to follow.

He smiles widely and picks up his jacket as he follows me outside.

~~~~

I rest my head against the headrest as me and my new partner drive down the main road. I glance over at him. He happily sits looking out the window excitedly. His dark hair shining in the sunlight.

I turn my eyes back to the road and try to push my annoyance down. It was only for two weeks. Surely i could handle that.

I turn the car into an old grocery store parking lot and turn the car off so we could clock people's speed. I sit back in the seat and watch the cars pass, my eyes feeling  heavy.

"Thank you for giving me this opportunity.” Donghun says sweetly. His dark eyes meeting mine.

I force a smile onto my face and answer, "You're welcome. I think you'll catch onto the routine pretty fast."

Donghun sits back in his chair and sighs, "I'm the new guy so no one really knows what to expect of me."

He sobers, however, and adds, "I'm sorry. If i'm not what you expected. Or maybe even wanted."

That makes me feel bad. So i turn to him and answer, "I was in a bad mood this morning. I just thought something different was coming my way today. But i know how it feels to be a rookie. Just listen to what i tell you and i think me and you will get along  great."

Donghun smiles widely at me. Making butterflies burst in my stomach, making me blush.

"I look forward to learning from you."  He says, his dark eyes sparkling.

~~~~~~

1 Month later;

"Donghun!" I yell, running down the street, chasing a runaway prisoner down the busy street of Korea. My lungs burning from how fast i have to run to keep up with the criminal. Who is now frantically throwing random things onto the street to try to stop me from following.

"Donghun, where are you?" I yell again into my walki-talki clipped against my chest.  Static answers me and i let out a growl.

I feel it start to get harder to keep up with the runaway, my legs now starting to cramp up. The prisoner takes a turn onto the busy street and maneuvers over several cars, which all honk angrily at him as he tries desperately to escape. He takes a turn onto one street when, suddenly, a black car swerves in front of him, blocking his path. The cars sudden appearance makes the man slam against the hood of the car before falling down hard against the pavement.

"Don't move." Donghun orders, pulling his gun from its holster. The man lays motionless on the ground, his hands up.

Donghun jerks him up by the collar before pushing him up against the car and putting handcuffs on him. Once the prisoner is locked securely inside the car I sit down on the pavement and lean my back against the cop car. Sweat rolls down my neck as i try to catch my breath. I stretch out my tired legs, exhausted from having chased the guy on foot for nearly two miles.

"What happened to you?" Donghun asks teasingly, handing me a bottled water.

I take it from him but still manage to meet his eyes to glare at him. "I was chasing that guy down while you were taking your sweet time." I say sourly.

Donghun lets out a sigh before defending, "I  wasn't about to chase the guy on foot like you did. I got in the car and decided to cut him off."

"You're supposed to stay close to me!" I say a little too loudly. "Partners stick together."

Donghun looks down at the ground, looking a little hurt. But he doesn't argue, he simply nods his head in understanding. Knowing better than to argue.

I stare at him for a moment before sighing and shaking my head. "That was good driving though.”  I admit.

And I realized it wasn't all Donghuns fault. Since I decided to keep him as my partner he had learned from me, but not all my good habits. He picked up the bit of recklessness i possessed. Plus, his fear of very little to almost nothing didn't help much. But really, since that first day we had been assigned to work together he had been a really good partner. And he had grown on me. Hence the reason he stayed.

Donghun smirks at me, "It was good, wasn't it?" He says proudly.

I roll my eyes at him and take his hand that was extended to me as i stand up.

"It wasn't half bad." I say, my body temperature feeling much cooler.

"For a rookie." I add with a smile.

Donghun narrows his eyes at me as he makes his way back to the drivers side. We start to climb in when i hear a small voice say behind me.

"Excuse me,"

I spin around to see a little girl, who couldn't have been more than five years old, looking up at me with big blue eyes.

"Hi sweetie!" I say cheerfully, bending down to her level.

The little girl looks behind her at her mother shyly before saying in a hushed voice,

"I love your hair."

I hadn't even realized my hair had fallen out of its tight bun. It cascaded down my back now in thick dark locks almost touching my waist.

I pull my hair over one shoulder, making the little girl reach out and touch it gently,

"You're like a princess." She says, her smile wide showing two teeth missing.

I laugh lightly, "I'm too sweaty to be a princess. But you look more like one with your cute headband." I say, gently touching her sparkly cat eared headband.

The little girl grins at me before removing the headband from her head and placing it gently on my head.

"Now you're a princess." She beams at me before skipping her way back to her mother.

I smile as she leaves and stand up, gently touching the small headband on my head.

"A princess, huh?" Donghun says, staring at me from the other side of the car.

I remove the headband from my head and start pulling my hair up again as i glare at him, "You have something smart to say?"

Donghun smirks at me, "Princess... It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?"

"Only I'm not, nor have i ever been, a princess." I shoot back.

"Maybe not." Donghun says, "But it does seem to work for you somehow. It would make a good pet name."

I let out a laugh as I open the car door and say jokingly, "Yeah. Maybe we should start calling each other that now. You call me princess and i can call you oppa or daddy."

The smile on Donghun's face vanishes and his cheeks turn a dark red before he clears his throat and gets in the car, slamming the door.

I feel puzzled as i sit in the seat next to him and buckle up. He doesn't meet my eyes, or speak to me as we head back to the station.

~~~~~~

2 Months Later;

"No." I say firmly, taking another sip of my hot coffee.

"Oh come on, princess." Donghun whines.

"Donghun," I warn, holding a hand up to stop him from talking more. "I told you not to call me that, I've been telling you for two months now."

Donghun flashes me a smile across the dark car before saying, "Too late now. I like it too much to give it up."

I let a laugh break through my lips, "What do you mean you 'like it'?" I ask, "I'm your superior and this is technically insubordination for not listening to me."

Donghun lets his head rest against the headboard behind him as he lets out a deep laugh. His breath could be seen leaving his mouth in a thick white cloud from how cold it was outside. The clock on the dash read 1:30 A.M and we were parked by an abandoned apartment complex pulling a night shift clocking speeds.

I readjust the hood of my sweatshirt on my head to block out the cold as i shoot back, "I am not playing truth or dare with you on duty, Donghun."

Donghun lets out a heavy sigh and slams his head against the headrest again in protest. "We have nothing else to do to pass the time.”

I rub my tired eyes and growl, knowing he wasn't completely wrong but i didn't want to admit it.

"Please princess..." Donghun whines in a low voice, his big brown eyes taking on a wounded puppy dog look.

"Fine." I breathe out, annoyed.

Donghun sits up excitedly and sets his coffee cup down in its coffee holder. "Truth or dare?"

I take a sip of my coffee and keep my eyes fixed on the road watching for cars as i answer, "Truth."

"Do you like being called princess?" Donghun asks, a dark grin on his face.

I reach over and slap him across the chest, laughing, "That is not a good first question, Lee Donghun!”

Donghun laughs with me as he rubs his chest where i hit him, "You said we could play this game and the rule is we can ask whatever we want. I wanted to ask that question. Now answer me."

I let out a sigh and hide my face in my hands. A  blush creeping onto my face. I was thankfully that it was dark outside.

"Yes."  I mumble against my hands. Defeated.

"I'm sorry, what? What did you say?" Donghun asks, leaning in closer to me as if he couldn't hear me.

I flick his forehead making him lean back in his chair, "You heard me, you brat." I say through a laugh, my face now burning.

Donghun smirks at me and holds my gaze, "Sensitive much, Princess?"

This makes me blush harder so i sit back in my seat and change the subject. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare." Donghun answers. I can hear in his voice that he’s proud of himself for making me flustered.

"Take a big sip of your coffee without blowing on it and burn your tongue as punishment for what you said." I say jokingly, making Donghun laugh. But I'm still shocked when he does it and manages to not spit all over the car.

We go back and forth like this for some time until the clock reads 3:30 A.M and we sit there half asleep, our coffee's long gone.

"Truth or dare?" Donghun asks through a yawn.

"Truth." I answer, rubbing my eyes. Exhausted.

"Do you prefer cats or dogs?"

"Dogs."  I answer, not hesitating.

Donghun nods, "I figured. I have a cat."

"You seem like a cat person." I say, pulling my sweatshirt closer to my neck.

"She's a special kind of cat." Dongun says, "Hae is a dwarf cat."

I let out a gasp, my excitement coming through my voice a little too much. "She stays little forever?"

Donghun lets out a chuckle at my excitement, "Yes, she does." He meets my eyes as he continues, "You should meet her sometime."

I can't help but smile at Donghun, somehow feeling my night was made by him saying i could meet little Hae. Donghun smiles back at me and holds my gaze for a little too long, making me nervous until i look away and clear my throat.

We lapse into silence for awhile, staring at the quiet road. I feel half asleep when Donghun's voice cuts through my head.

"Truth or dare?" He says softly.

"Truth." I answer, yawning against my sleeve.

"What happened to your first partner?'

I freeze, wondering if i heard him right. Half of me hopes i heard him very wrong.

"I won't force you to tell me." Donghun adds quickly. "But since we've been partners for awhile i think it only fair i know."

I fiddle with my sleeves, knowing he's right. But i still felt hesitant to tell him. Even though he had asked me this question before and i refused to tell him. The car is silent for awhile. My minds swims as it tries to find words.

"When i first joined the force," I begin, making Donghun face me. "I didn't have a partner. I was really new so i was trained by others and handled odd jobs around the station. Then after a year, they let me have a partner. His name was Sanghoon. He was just a kid. Spry, goofy, late to almost all of our shifts. But incredibly smart and loving. He was like a little brother to me."

I pause a moment, trying not to tear up. Donghun sits patiently beside me.

"Then one day, me and Sanghoon got called to a bomb threat. Our job was just to talk the terrorist down and wait for the bomb squad to come in. The guy pulled a gun out and was going to start shooting and before he could Sanghoon tackled him to the ground and took the gun away. But the terrorist managed to get his gun back and get away from Sanghoon. And he shot him."

I take a shaky breath and focus on holding back tears. I don't even notice that Donghun had laced his fingers through mine. "I held his head and tried to stop the bleeding. His eyes were so full of tears from fear. But at the same time, he was so brave. He slipped into unconsciousness and went into shock and was taken to a hospital. But he was so unstable even after surgery that the family decided to take him off life support. He died five days later."

I feel Donghun slide a finger down my cheek, wiping a tear away as he says softly, "I’m sorry."

I focus back on the road and don't answer him. Trying to shut off the emotions that had been kept inside for too long.

Donghun takes my face in his hands, making me meet his eyes. My body tenses under his touch and i feel my cheeks grow hot upon realizing how close his face was to mine.

"That wasn't your fault.” Donghun says more firmly, "It was an accident. Losing someone never makes you a bad person. You hear me?"

I nod my head. Surprised by the firmness in his voice but at the same time grateful to hear those words from someone who tried to understand me.

Donghun's hands stay on my face, keeping me pinned there. I feel his thumb rub back and forth against my cheek, making me blush harder.

I stare at him, not entirely sure what to do. My body tense and rigid against his touch. Donghun's gaze lingers over my eyes and then down to my mouth, making a shiver go down my spine. But I'm still surprised when his nose brushes against mine gently before closing the gap and meeting my lips.

I suck in a breath and keep my eyes open for a second before letting them close as his lips move against mine, His hand moves from my cheek to the back of my neck pulling me closer. I let my hands rest against his chest as i enjoy the contrast between the cold night and his lips.

Donghun lets out a sigh as my tongue meets his and my fingers find his soft hair. I let out a gasp when he pulls me from my seat in the drivers spot and onto his lap and pulls my hair out of its ponytail before letting his fingers entangle in it as he starts kissing down my neck. His warm breath fanning across my cold skin.

I shiver but manage to get out between breaths, "Donghun, we're still on duty." I point out.

Donghun bites my jawline making me groan before he says. "It's 4 A.M, which means our shift ended. Which means, you can't escape, princess."

Donghun kisses my lips again before adding, "But something tells me you aren't going to try to leave."

I bite his lower lip before responding, "I'm still your superior."

Donghun smirks and rests his head against the headrest, making me run one of my nails down his neck until he lets out a sharp breath. "Just tell me where to bite then.”

MAIN MASTERLIST

[trashyswitch]

Patton, the Cute Little Puppy Baby Bat Fly Fly Baby Dog(s)

Patton LOVES turning himself into Talyn! Why? Because Patton wants to be tiny! And Talyn is tiny!

Roman, Virgil and Logan absolutely appreciate this, and decide to take advantage of it!

Tiny Disclaimer: I will be identifying Talyn as they/them, Patton as him/he, and Palyn as they/them. Though I know that Patton (Thomas) identifies as a man, I wanna make Palyn non-binary, to suit Talyn and to not upset anyone who's incredibly protective and technical about the whole thing. I love, support and respect non-binary folks (I have a couple friends who identify as such), and would hate to accidentally misgender someone.

(Though, I often mix up male and female pronouns as it is...It's a blessing/curse of mine...😂)

Ever since the 'Making Some Changes' video, Patton has loved being able to walk around like Thomas's friends! He loved being Joan and making him laugh, he appreciated being Valerie just for the fun of it, he absolutely LOVED becoming Talyn to become more adorable, and he loved becoming other people he's befriended! Heck, Patton has even become the voices of Steven Universe to make a Steven Universe joke!

After a while, Patton narrowed down which of Thomas's friends were his favorite to become. Soon, he had decided that his favorite person to turn himself into was: Talyn!

Why, you're probably asking? Well you see: It's simple, really: they’re tiny, therefore adorable! Patton is adorable, but missing the short-statured part! So, becoming Talyn made that a lot easier!

Every part of Talyn was very tiny compared to Thomas. Tiny stature, tiny body size, tiny head, tiny voice! The only thing that WASN'T tiny, was their life!

Plus...doing Talyn's Danny Devito impression was ALWAYS fun to make fun of...

Virgil didn't know how he felt about Patton becoming Talyn at first...To be honest, it was a little confusing. If Virgil was looking away and heard Talyn's voice, he'd have to turn around to figure out if Talyn was ACTUALLY there, or if it was just Patton messing around. But eventually, Virgil got used to it and began to have fun with it! He'd treat Talyn Patton like a little child (That was Patton's dream come true!), started making short jokes, and even began putting his sweater on the tiny Patton! Eventually, Virgil would go as far as to ruffle up Patton's different-colored hair!

Sometimes when Patton would turn into Talyn, Patton would show off the many different hairstyles Talyn has sported over the years! The firey red long hair, the bisexual flag-colored hair (plus eyebrows), the green long hair, the yellowish faded short hair, the grey and black short hair, you name it! Patton tried them all out on himself!

Roman absolutely loved it! He loved being able to see Talyn Patton! Roman eventually came up with a name that could describe the tiny Patton: Palyn! Roman would give the tiny Palyn piggyback rides, cuddles, hugs, and even dress them up in adorable outfits and do their make up! The Patton-being-Talyn thing didn't change anything about him! So, it only made their friendship stronger!

Meanwhile, Logan had started out...worried about the idea...What if Patton began to wish he was Talyn, and began associating himself as Talyn forever? Everyone would miss Patton's squared glasses and bigger, more lovable body. But soon, Logan learned that this was more of an appreciation thing, and not an identity thing. So, Logan began appreciating Palyn and treating them the same way he would treat Patton.

One of the days, Patton had turned himself into Talyn and began going through Patton's closet. In the closet, were multiple blue-collared shirts, a single grey shirt for tying around the neck, and Patton's cat hoodie! Palyn decided to grab the hoodie, and put it on their tiny self.

It...is gigantic...It's like wearing a hoodie dress! It fell down to their knees, and the sleeves were SUPER long! Palyn giggled at how silly they looked, and put the hood on with their sleeve-covered hands.

The hood practically drowned their head in grey fabric...

But, Palyn didn't care! They felt happy! They felt drowned in love! Now, Palyn wanted to show it off! So, off they went: running into the living room to where the rest of the sides might've been.

"Hey Palyn!" Roman said before running up the person, picking them up to hug them and spinning around in the hug.

"'Palyn'? You're calling Patton Palyn now?" Virgil asked.

Roman slowed his spinning to a halt and placed them down. "It's a mix of Patton and Talyn! P-a-l-y-n! Palyn!" Roman explained.

"...I approve this name. I believe it suits-" Logan lifted up his glasses to look down at his vocabulary cards. "sssmmooooolll-'smol' Patton, nicely." Logan told them.

Virgil rolled his eyes. "Right context, bad grammar. Good try, though." Virgil corrected.

"Strange...What context would you use this in?" Logan asked, having his vocabulary card ready to take notes.

"To start: 'Smol' is not an adjective. It's a 'noun', meaning: 'something that's tiny, cute and squish-able'. The best way you could use it, is through a nickname: Smol bean, which means the same thing, basically." Virgil explained briefly.

Logan nodded as he finished up his note-taking. "Okay. Thank you, Virgil. Now, I will turn my attention to the 'smol bean' that's right beside me." Logan stated. Palyn had started jumping up and down, and clapping its covered hands excitedly as Roman lightly squeezed his cheeks.

"Aren't they the most adorable hooman being you've ever seen?" Roman asked. Logan's eyes widened as he started going through his vocabulary cards again. Realizing that word was missing from his deck, Logan conjured up a new vocabulary card and a pen to write it down.

"hoo-man...how do you spell that?" Logan asked.

"H-o-o-m-a-n." Palyn told him.

Logan followed Palyn's spelling. "Okay, and what does it mean?" Logan asked.

Virgil gave Logan a 'seriously?' face, but still decided to help him out. "It's a version of the word 'human'. Gen Z's decided to turn it into 'hooman', so that they can describe what us humans are, according to dogs and cats.'" Virgil explained. "Here: Patton, can you demonstrate?" Virgil asked, pulling the hood off their head.

To demonstrate, Palyn curled his wrists in front of his chin like a puppy, and began acting like a talking dog. "Hooman? Hooman give me food? Am I good pupper? Pupper good boy? LUV ME HOOMAN!" Palyn demonstrated before hugging Logan from behind the couch.

Patiently, Palyn waited for Logan to say something. Logan didn't know what to say...Well, he did, but...how? Should he just tell him in his normal, monotone voice? Or should he attempt the messy grammar that Palyn used?

"Uuuh...Yes..." Logan started, before patting their head awkwardly. "Palyn is a good boy." Logan replied in an awkward version of his monotone voice.

Suddenly, Palyn gasped and smiled widely as he let go of Logan! "I'm a good boy! I'm a GOOD BOY! ROMAN! ROMAN! I'M A GOOD BOY!" Palyn shouted, spinning circles around the man excitedly. As he sprinted around Roman, Patton's sweater sleeves would fly outwards behind his back. It was a hilarious little feature that came with Palyn.

"You what I think Wittle ol' pawyn might want?" Roman asked, getting Palyn's attention. Palyn quickly stopped his running right in front of Roman, still filled with endless energy. "I think...Palyn needs some spins!" Roman declared, becoming the ultimate babysitter in the group. Roman picked up Palyn from behind, and began spinning them around. Both of Palyn's eyes and mouth widened in excitement as they got spun around like a really quick-spinning carousel! Virgil, in order to avoid getting a pair of legs to the groin, quickly jumped onto the safe couch, which lie out of bounds from the crazy carousel in the room.

"WHEEEEEEEEEE! FASTER ROMAN! FASTER!" Patton shouted happily.

"NO! DON'T go any faster! This is fast enough!" Virgil warned him, quickly becoming the anxious parent in the family.

Roman continued to spin them for a little longer, before slowing down the chilc. He didn't wanna overdo it.

"What do you wanna do next?" Roman asked.

Palyn's face lit up. "Hide and seek with tickles?" Palyn asked.

Roman gasped, and clapped his hands together. "Great idea!" Roman reacted, excitedly.

"Can I join? I wanna be it." Virgil asked.

"Sure!" Roman replied.

"I'd like to be it as well." Logan piped up.

"Of course! The more, the merrier!" Roman replied, before looking back at Patton. "Okay. You can start hiding, while we start counting." Roman reacted with a smirk.

Palyn stared at his lers for a couple seconds before he quickly sprinted away, over-sized hoodie, tiny legs and all.

Roman started the counting up from zero, while Logan and Virgil counted on their fingers along with him."1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10! 11...12-" Roman counted.

By this point, Palyn had successfully found their little hiding spot.

"...13...14...15...16...17...18...19...20! Ready or not, here I come!" Roman called.

Roman began looking around for the little adult. He was fully aware of which way they had ran. But, Roman wanted to make this as teasy and fun as possible! So, he started out by looking throughout the living room for them. After taking a minute or so of looking, all 3 lers moved onto the kitchen.

"I wonder...Where would our adorable Palyn be?" Roman asked, checking under the table as he teased.

Virgil tiptoed towards the sink, and quickly whipped the door open. As anticipated, no one was there. "Not under the sink..." Virgil told the captain out loud.

"He's not in the stove...which is good. We wouldn't want Palyn turning into a roast dinner by the time we're done..." Logan stated, purposefully being a little funny to get Palyn giggling.

Next, the three lers moved onto the bedrooms. For this part, Logan, Roman and Virgil all split up to check their rooms.

Logan went to his own room. Checking under the bed, checking the closet, checking under his desk, even checking in the wash basket! but...Palyn was nowhere to be found.

Roman went to his room as well. He checked in the magical closet, checked his mirror door, even double checked under his huge teddy bear! But...he was nowhere to be seen.

Virgil quickly checked his room too. He checked under his bed covers, checked behind the dressers, and even checked his closet of hoodies-

Wait a second...One of these sweaters is not dark like the others...One of them happens to be a light grey, and...is wearing brown-pants? That's GOTTA be Palyn!

So...Virgil turned himself around, and began to leave the room. "He's not in here." Virgil yelled to his fellow lers.

"He's not in my room either." Roman replied.

"Absent in mine." Logan said.

Before Roman could suggest the next place, Virgil put a finger over his mouth and signaled for them to follow him. Virgil led them into his room, and showed them the...obvious color-change in the closet. For now though, all 3 lers stood at the door frame to discuss their 'problem' out loud.

"Well, I gotta say: He is absolutely no where to be found! And I don't believe Patton would hide himself in his own room...would he?" Roman asked loudly.

Suddenly, a little sound could be heard in the distance...an adorable little giggle, bouncing off the walls back to them.

"Wait...Do you hear that? I think Palyn might be giving us hints to where he is." Logan told them.

"I can hear it too. It's a cute little giggle. It sounds a bit like Talyn's, but with a flare of...Thomas in it..." Virgil described.

"Could it be..." Roman asked, drifting off.

"Palyn?" Everyone said at the same time.

It only took a second for Palyn's giggles to grow louder in volume.

"Maybe we should let the giggles lead us to our hider..." Logan suggested.

"Oooh, good idea!" Roman replied.

So, all three of the lers walked around in the hallway, pretending to listen closely for where the giggles might be coming from.

"Hey Virgil! I think they might be in your room!" Roman declared, winking at him.

Virgil smiled and nodded to Roman, before walking up to the door. "Really? But I already checked here! How in the world could they be hiding in a place I already checked?" Virgil asked out loud.

"Well, perhaps you didn't check hard enough?" Logan suggested.

Virgil rolled his eyes, but winked at Roman to go in. "Move over, my grim, royal poet! I, will check the room." Roman declared, opening the door.

Patton's giggles had started coming on strong again. So, Roman decided to pretend to look absolutely everywhere, except for the one place they were in. The longer he looked around, the louder Palyn's giggling became!

After looking absolutely everywhere, Roman turned around with his fingers together in the shape of a handgun!

"Palyn! Put your hands up where I can see 'em!" Roman yelled, pointing the finger gun at the closet.

Palyn immediately put their hands up upon demand. Palyn began to giggle more now.

"You're under arrest!" Roman ordered. "Officer Logan, Officer Virgil, we've got 'em." Roman ordered. Running up to the 'crime scene', was was his back up officers: Virgil with one finger gun and a shield, and Logan with his finger gun and a walkie-talkie in hand. Palyn, in his giggly state, slowly walked out of the closet and knelt down to their knees. "Palyn, you are under arrest for adorableness in the first degree! How do you plead?" Roman asked, pretending to hold a microphone now.

Patton, through his giggles, attempted to answer. "G-Guihihihilty! Ihihi'm guihihihihiltyhyhy!" Patton replied.

"You've heard it here, folks! They are guilty! Therefore:" Roman acted, before pretending to bang a gavel against a wooden striking block. "I sentence you to 15 minutes of tickles!" Roman ordered. Suddenly, Roman ran up to them with finger claws and a growling sound! Palyn squeaked in excitement and practically flopped onto the ground, happy to take the ticklish 'sentence'. Roman began to shove his hands underneath the grey cat sweater, and began to squeeze, claw, and flutter his fingers all over Palyn's upper body.

Palyn bursted out in high-pitched laughter, and began rolling back and forth to cope with the tickles. Next, Virgil joined Roman on the ground, and began fluttering his fingers on Palyn's ticklish, tiny neck. With the bigger fingers on the tinier neck, Virgil was able to cover more ground all at once.

"EEEEEEEK! VIHIHIHIRGAHAHAHAL! EEEEhehehehehahahahaha! Ihihihihit TIHIHihihickles!" Palyn reacted, flailing the long, grey sleeves absolutely everywhere.

Roman gasped in surprise. "ReAllY?! it TiCkLeS?! I had NO CLUE! Virgil, did you know this?" Roman reacted dramatically.

"No, I didn't! I'm quite surprised! What about you, Logan?" Virgil reacted, being a little dramatic as well.

Logan rolled his eyes, but still decided to go along with it. He made a rather empty gasp, and widened his eyes for a split second. "I'm flabbergasted." Logan replied in a monotone voice as he did jazz hands.

"See!? Even LOGAN is going crazy! I simply cannot believe you're ticklish!" Roman reacted.

Logan, wanting to join in as well, knelt down in front of Palyn's feet and began to tickle their socked feet as well.

"HEHEHEHEHEY! NAHAHAHAT MYHYHY FEEHEHEHEHEHETSIHIHIHIES!" Patton yelled through a quickly increasing laughing fit.

Logan placed his hands on his cheeks like Kevin in Home Alone, and gasped again. "Wow. Your little footsies are ticklish too? What a surprise." Logan reacted in an empty voice.

Somehow, Logan's mostly dead reactions seemed to make Palyn laugh even more! Perhaps dramatic irony is Palyn's favorite type of humor? Who knows?

"Who's a tickwish wittle chiwd? YOU are! WHO'S de most ticku-ticku-tickwish chiwd in de whole mind pawace? YOU are! Yes, YOU are!" Roman teased in a baby voice.

"THEHE TEHEHEHEHEHEASIHIHIHING! IHIHIHIT'S KIHIHIHIHILLIHIHING MEHEHEHEHE!" Patton shouted.

"Oh! What's this? the teasing is killing you? My goodness! We have to save them! But, how?" Roman reacted dramatically.

"Wait, you're telling me you DON'T know CPR?" Logan asked, pretending along with him.

"Well, do YOU?" Roman asked right back.

"Um-........well no..." Logan admitted.

"Move over, idiots. I know how to do CPR. It's rather easy, really. All you have to do is liiiiift up the hoodie..." Virgil explained as he began lifting the hoodie up to expose Palyn's tummy. Palyn immediately began to giggle in their sleeves. They knew EXACTLY what was coming next. "And...give them a raspberry! Like this:" Virgil explained, before blowing a great big raspberry into Patton's stomach.

Patton let out a loud, high-pitched squeal, before dissolving into endless laughter once again!

"Now, remember: longer raspberries tend to do more to help. So, the longer, the better! Like this!" Virgil explained before blowing an even BIGGER raspberry! Patton squealed once again, and dissolved into even MORE laughter! Virgil's CPR raspberries seemed to go on for another couple minutes. And you could tell, that Palyn was enjoying every second of it!

"IHIHIHI'M AHAHAHALIHIHIHIHIVE! IHIHI'M AHAHALIHIVE!" Patton shouted through their loud laughter.

"Virgil, look! They're alive! You saved them!" Roman reacted happily as he hugged Virgil. Virgil smiled at Palyn, and picked them up bridal style.

"Hey Palyn, would you like to watch a movie and cuddle?" Virgil asked.

"Yes please!" Palyn replied.

"Alright, let's go." Virgil said before carrying Palyn out of his room. Roman and Logan followed suit, and helped them choose a movie to watch.

Pretty soon, all 4 sides had covered themselves in blankets, and let the movie Bambi play on their TV. The truth was, Palyn felt very comfortable. Patton loved being tiny. He loved being cuddled, tickled, loved, and being silly! That was one of the reasons Patton liked turning himself into Talyn. They were allowed to be adorable AND be tiny at the same time.

However: tiny or not, adorable or not, Patton still felt forever loved by his family. The proof was all there, and Palyn loved it.

Fun fact: Most of the nicknames Thomas and his sides come up with, have backstories and deeper meanings.

Example; Nerdy Wolverine: Wolverine's first name is Logan.

Grim, Royal Poet: Grim = another word for Emo. Royal poet represented the well-documented Roman Poet by the name of Virgil, who wrote a violent, suspenseful poem called Aeneid. The poem was one day published by Caesar Augustus, the ruler of the Roman Empire. Cool, huh?!

Funny thing is, Thomas came across this name by accident! What a coincidence!! 😃

[thewritingstar]

ButchxBubbles friendship???

Thanks for the request :)

The thought of Butch and Bubbles having a spa night? Yes please. Im not really good at writing friendship fluff fics so i hope this is ok. I really like the idea of their friendship dynamic and maybe I’ll elaborate more on it. Plus I wrote this at like 1 am so yeah. 

Enjoy. :) Request and asks always open

----

Bubbles finished bringing all her products from the bathroom to her bedroom. She had everything ready for her spa treatment as her sisters were off on some over night history field trip for their class. Of course she wasn’t in that class so she was left by herself and the professor was out of town for a couple of days. 

She had quite the collection of things to do and wished someone was here to do it with her. She could call Robin but she knew she had gone to her cousins house and her other friends lived a few miles away. Boomer had even gone on the trip but was sending her photos every ten minutes. 

“Guess its just us tonight.” She looked to Octi who just stared at her with his button eye. 

A sound came from behind and she turned to see something hitting her window. She got closer and saw that a figure was there. She threw open the window and looked outside. Her eyes widening slightly as she saw who was hovering. 

“Butch?” She said questionably and he gave her a small wave. 

“Sup Blondie.” He smirked. 

Her signature giggle echoed. “What are you doing here?”

“Well since every one is gone on that stupid trip, I thought why not see what you’re up to” He shrugged. 

“Are you sure?” She looked behind her at the set up she had. “I don’t think my plans is something you would be up for.” 

He flew past her and she closed the window. “Don’t care, I am bored.” He took a spot on the floor in front of the blanket that was laid out and coated with products upon products. 

Bubbles walked over and sat on the other side looking at all the products. “I was just going to do a spa night time or what I like to call Bubbles Time.” She sighed. 

He shifted a little. “I can leave if you want, I just thought-”

“No!” She held up her hands and shook her head. “No you don’t have to go. My sisters don’t ever participate so its nice having someone here, even if you don’t wanna be pampered.” 

Butch picked up a bottle while Bubbles fasten her hair into two cute space buns. He popped open the cap and took a sniff. Coconut and pineapple filled his nose and he could tell Bubbles wasn’t as bubbly as usual. He didn’t want to slap the shit on his face but knowing that not even Blossom wanted to do this with her, he thought why not. 

“Im game. Whats first?” He asked.

She looked up at him with a blank stare. “Really?” Her face slightly turned almost like a cute puppy dog. 

“Sure why not. Your skin is probably hella smooth and its not like this shit is gonna hurt.” 

Her smile was blinding as nodded. She let out a high pitched squeal and soon her was pulled into a hug. “Thank you Butch! Thank you! Not even Boomie would do this with me, fucking meanie.” he whispered the last part and he was let go from the bone crushing hug. 

“Nah fuck Boomie.” he slightly cringed at the nickname but now he had blackmail against his baby bro. “This is Bubbs and Butch time.” 

She clapped her hands together and began preparing.

--

“So now this will open your pores and get the rest of all that dirt. Geez your pores are huge.” Bubbles said as she popped open the toner and spread it on the cotton pad.

“Rude.” Butch said but took the soaked cotton from her. He watched her apply it to her skin and copied her motions while looking in the mirror. His hair was pushed away from his face with a light purple hairband that had cat ears on it. “This shit kinda burns.”

“Don’t be a pussy.” 

“Damn Bubbs didn’t know you cussed often.” He held out his hand to accept the moisturizer from her. “Kinda bad ass.” 

She laughed at this. “Oh Blossy doesn’t like it and of course BC does. After all I am hard core.” She playfully shrugged. 

---

“And then she fucking blew me off to hang out with Mitch, can you believe that!” Butch complained. 

“I hate when she does that, always forgetting plans.” Bubbles sighed as she filed his nails and blew off the dust. 

He looked at his other hand examining the clean nails. “You don’t think I have to worry about him right?” 

She leaned over to look through her massive collection of nail polishes and pick a base coat and a dark green color and a pure black one. “Butch honey, he gay.” 

“I knew that.” He said quickly. He looked at the polish. “What about just clear?”

Bubbles looked at him and raised her brows. “You know its really punk and cool for guys to paint their nails, plus Buttercup thinks its hot but you didn’t here it from me.” She wagged her eyebrows and dangled the bottle in front of him. 

He snatched the black and shook it. “Paint me up Sugar.” 

--

“Aww I wish Boomie did something like that for me.” Bubbles cooed at the screen. 

“Sugar, they are just sitting on a gold course throwing grapes at each other.” He pointed out and she hit him with a pillow. “Watch the nails.” He lifted his hands. 

“I know its simple but Troy and Gabrielle are cute and hey, I’m a sucker for cute romance.” He was sure her eyes were full of stars at this point.  “Look they are dancing in the water!”

“How many times have you seen this?” 

“Twenty seven.” The oven in the kitchen dinged and she got up. “Cookies are done. You want milk too?”

“Hell ya.” 

She got up and walked away and he took out his phone. There was a message from Buttercup. 

Spice Babe: is she torturing you?

He held his phone up to snap a selfie of his cat ear hair band. 

Me: Nope but i look hot af now. Good luck keeping your paws off me. 

Spice Babe: lol sure btw this shit blows, be thankful youre not here

Me: sucks 2 be you but i got fresh cookies from bubbs

Spice Babe: Lucky bastard

The plate of cookies was set in front of him and he clicked his phone away as she paused the movie. 

“Buttercup having fun?”

“Nope but thats not my problem.” He grinned. “ So whats next?” he asked almost a bit too excitedly.  

Bubbles covered her mouth to finish chewing. “Well its getting late and I was gonna do a face mask and build a pillow fort.”

“oh.” He realized that it meant he should probably go. 

“Do you wanna make pillow forts and have a pillow fight? Oh and a sleep over!”

His eyes widened with a giant grin. “Fuck Yeah!” 

--

His neck almost popped as the pillow was slammed into his face and he had never seen the vicious look on her face before. Even with temporary tattoos and a sparkly face mask that smelt like berries, his was pink and strawberry scent, she was still scary. 

“Prepare to die!” She shouted as she raised a pillow over her head. 

“Oh shit.” He ducked and shot one back at her, hitting her in the stomach making her grunt. Her elbow knocked on the table and they watched as the homemade smoothies shook and almost spilled. 

Their eyes met and they busted out laughing before setting the pillows down. 

“Lets wash these off and then call it a night?” She said and he followed her to the bathroom. His feet were now inside bunny slippers that were a tad to small a she was rocking matching dog ones. 

He let out a yawn as she handed him a towel to dry his face and before long, they had shut off the lights and got into their pillow forts that were facing each other. 

“Thanks for hanging out with me. It means a lot.” She said and he looked at the ceiling. 

“I had fun. You’re pretty cool Sugar.” 

“I’m glad someone thinks so.” 

“Whats that mean?” He asked and he heard a small sigh. 

She held onto Octi and even though she couldn’t see his face, she knew he had a frown on. 

“Most people just think of me as the cute girl, which is true but im more than that. Sometimes even kicking a monsters ass doesn’t prove that I am strong and mighty.”

“Listen I know for a fact you are cool and strong. I got my ass handed to me by you once or twice in our child hood. Most people think im just some meat head who can punch.” 

“I don’t think that.” She said and he believed her. “I think you are really talented at sports and just like to punch, nothing wrong with that. But you are also kind and sweet and I see how you make Buttercup feel and some meat head couldn’t do that.” 

He smirked to himself. “Thanks Bubbles.” 

“Any time.”

A comfortable silence filled the room before he spoke up. “I really appreciate how much you care about Boomer. Its hard growing up without any form of love and every time he comes home, his smile is real and I know its because of you.”

Bubbles hugged Octi closer as a blush formed on her face after she sent Boomer a good night text. “He just makes me really happy.” 

“Thats good. But I am gonna kick his ass for not taking you on cute dates because my homie deserves is.” 

“Omg Butch are we bffs?”

“For sure.” And their shared laughter faded off as sleep took over.  

--

The morning came fast and the pair quickly cleaned everything up before homemade pancakes were eaten. 

“This shit is amazing Bubbs.” Butch finished his plate. 

“Aww thanks. Oh looks like everyone should be back in an hour.” 

He stood and took the plate to the sink. “Well I’ll get going because I don’t need Blossom on my ass about any of this.” 

“I can handle her don’t worry.” She winked and soon she was alone finishing up her pancakes with a smile.

--

The front door opened and Brick and Boomer came walking in. Brick slammed his body on the couch and went straight to sleep while Boomer went to the kitchen where Butch was making a grilled cheese. 

“I can’t believe you had a sleep over with my girlfriend.”

“Hi to you too. And chill we are just besties.” He winked. “Kinda lame that you never do any of this stuff with her.” He picked up the finished meal and bit into it before shaking his head at him. “Ya know, shes pretty cool and all she wants is to pamper and watch high school musical.”

“But you hate those things.” 

Butch shrugged. “Yeah but my new bestie doesn’t and I support queens.” 

Boomer gave him a weird look. “What did she do to you?”

He flipped him off, showing off his nails. “By the way she wants cuter dates. If you are going to simp then do it right Boomie.” He mocked before grabbing his plate. “Now if you’ll excuse me, Sugar and I are going to the mall fuck face.” 

Boomer frowned as he took all the food. “Hey don’t call her that!” 

“See ya later simp.” 

---

hope you liked :) 

[hms-chill]

The Long Way

A nice fun Liam/Spencer fic, because these boys deserve the world.

Summary: (Alternately titled “SOMEONE GIVE LIAM A HUG” or “Stronk Farm Boyfriends”)Liam’s just finishing up vet school, and he’s a month shy of achieving the thing he’s been working for since he was a kid. When he gets called out to a farm to witness a calf birth and notices something wrong, under-researched, and curable, it’s the perfect thing to treat and document so he can write a paper that will jump-start his career. Of course, the fact that the calf is owned by a cute dairy farmer doesn’t hurt, either.

Chapter one // Chapter two // On AO3

Chapter 3

The next morning, Spencer wakes up to a note telling him that the cows have been fed, milked, loved, and let out to pasture, and that Liam had cleaned the milking parlor as well as he could before he had to leave, but that someone else should probably look it over and make sure he did it well enough. It also tells him that he has a temperature and is supposed to stay in bed and ask his parents to come look after him and supervise things today, and it promises that Liam will come by that night with soup, medicine, and popcorn if Spencer's feeling up to it. He texts Liam his thanks, and Liam responds with a picture of a dog he's looking after and a reminder to stay in bed and let himself be taken care of. It's not something Spencer's particularly good at, but he obeys Liam's orders, letting his parents come out to run the farm for the day while he naps and does some work from bed.

That night, Liam arrives with a container of frozen soup and a bag full of painkillers, Tylenol, and other medicine cabinet staples. He makes Spencer sit and watch while he heats up soup on the stove, putting another container in the freezer before Spencer can argue. He refuses to listen when Spencer says he can restock his own medicine cabinet, or when Spencer tries to tell him to study for the NAVLE while he stirs the soup. At this point, it's only a week or two away, and Spencer's seen the test prep books and the notes scattered around the back of video calls and in his car. He's gotten glimpses of how hard Liam's working, but tonight, Liam refuses to study, instead getting Spencer settled on the couch, then coming over with bowls of soup and settling on the opposite end, which is apparently enough space between them that he doesn't have to worry about getting sick. He insists Spencer pick a movie for them to watch, something lighthearted that he's seen before, and when it turns out Liam's never seen Treasure Planet, Spencer pulls that up for them to watch with their soup. Even as he finishes dinner and feels the tiredness of being sick start to set in, he keeps his eyes open, fighting against yawns and drooping eyelids to watch Liam react to Jim's adventures.

Spencer's exhaustion is just starting to win against his desire to watch Liam finish the movie when he notices what might be tears on Liam's cheeks. That wakes him up enough to turn back to the TV, and he sees Jim and Long John Silver talking. He forces himself awake enough to pay attention, and it's a moment he always loved as a kid. He can quote it word for word, and for years, he had a poster that said "you've got the makings of greatness in you" on his wall. It's the first time in the movie when Jim's felt good at what he does, and maybe the first time in years he's been told he's not just a mess, and Spencer remembers always being happy to see him get a hug. His parents used to hug him at this point, and tell him they loved him. And suddenly, a question about Liam's parents surfaces from the depths of his sleepy mind.

He's not awake enough to formulate it, or to read Liam's expression enough to know if he can ask. He's not sure if he's healthy enough to be allowed to do anything about Liam's tears. But just sitting there feels wrong, too. Slowly, he reaches his foot across the couch to rest it on Liam's. Liam doesn't react, but he doesn't move away, either. Spencer falls asleep with his foot on Liam's, trying to think of a reason for him to cry or a way to ask about it.

--

Liam had meant to turn the movie off and study when Spencer fell asleep, but somehow, he can't stop watching. Knowing it was one of Spencer's favorite movies from when he was a kid probably doesn't hurt; he can tell himself he's just watching to get to know Spencer better. It's definitely not because he wants to watch Jim achieve his dreams, or to know that he gets to have a home and a family and people who love him even if he's messed up time and time again.

He watches through the end of the movie, and only when the credits are rolling is he able to tear himself away enough to turn it off and gather their dishes. He comes back to the couch to take Spencer to bed but instead finds him just starting to blink awake, pushing himself upright.

"Sorry, I... I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"No, it's alright. You fell right into the trap. The movie was part of my master plan to make you fall asleep early," Liam says, and Spencer smiles though a yawn.

"Did you like it?"

"I did. Now, come on, let's get you to bed."

"What time is it?"

"Bedtime, at least for people with fevers. If you sleep like you have been, you're going to take longer to get better."

"But I wanted to quiz you," Spencer says. His voice is still thick with sleep, and he yawns massively before he can continue, rubbing at his eyes. His hair sticks up in the back, and somewhere, even if he knows he shouldn't, Liam finds it adorable. "I don't want to get you sick, but you can send me your quizlet or your study guide or something and I can quiz you from my laptop. I... if you're going to help me, I want to help you study, and I'm not getting off this couch until you let me."

"Nope, come on," Liam says. He's started trying to pull Spencer up, but Spencer refuses to budge, grabbing on to the back of the couch.

"No! Let me--" he's cut off by a cough, one that has Liam frowning and resting a hand on his forehead.

"If I let you quiz me once, you'll go to bed after?" He asks, and Spencer nods. Liam seems to weigh his options for a moment, then sighs. "Alright. I'll go get my stuff, and if you're awake when I get back from the car, you can quiz me before you go to bed. I don't know what kind of weird deal we just made, but if it'll get you to look after yourself, I'll do it."

"You fell... right into my trap. My master plan to make you study," Spencer says, yawning in the middle of it. Liam rolls his eyes and goes to get his stuff, and he comes back to find Spencer clearly fighting to stay awake. He hands Spencer half his flashcards over the back of the couch, slipping the rest into his bag as he comes to sit down. Spencer doesn't notice, just starts to quiz him, stumbling over the Latin and yawning his way through the longer words. Liam just gets through the flashcards as quickly as they can, then gets Spencer up and to bed before settling down outside his room to keep studying until he's too tired to focus, when he gets up, checks on Spencer one last time, and heads out to the barn to sleep in the hay and sawdust with Annie.

He gets the morning chores taken care of the next day before going home to shower and change, and he texts Spencer that he's looked after things. He's at work when he gets a reply, that Spencer's feeling better but still has a fever, so he's resting again that day if Liam wants to come by and share the rest of the soup. So they fall into another pattern and another set of roles in each other's lives, though Liam's soup is replaced with Spencer's mom's cooking before long. They work their way through Spencer's favorite childhood movies, and Liam studies to a soundtrack of Robin Hood and Aladdin and The Fox and the Hound as Spencer's fever goes down and he falls asleep on the couch. When he's feeling well enough to go back to work, Liam thinks that'll be the end of it. After all, he's helped with what Spencer needs, and now that Spencer doesn't need him anymore, he won't be invited back. But that day at lunch, he gets a text inviting him over for dinner and either a night off or a study session, whichever he wants.

The thought of dedicating a Friday night to the NAVLE when it will already be consuming his weekend makes him want to scream, so he takes Spencer up on the option of a night off, and Spencer asks if he knows how to ride a horse. When Liam pulls up to the ranch that night, he finds Spencer standing outside a barn with two of the horses saddled up and a picnic packed in the saddle bags. They mount up, and Spencer leads the way out toward the pastures, where they can greet the cows and the newest addition to the ranch, a donkey Spencer's neighbors hadn't been able to look after anymore who he's agreed to take care of and let their grandkids visit. The animals are glad to see them, especially Spencer after he's been gone, but there's something special about the fact that they recognize Liam, too. Once they've loved them, though, Spencer leads them further back into the ranch, to land Liam's never seen that they rent out for boy scout camping and other events in the summer and fall. There's a stream and a fish pond, and when Spencer stops them on its banks and pulls out some of his mom's food, they're surrounded by all the gorgeous beauty of the open country that Liam's missed since his family moved into Austin proper.

Spencer asks him about work, and Liam gets to tell him about dogs and cats and a pigeon that someone had brought in for them to help out. He'd asked to be put on the pigeon case, and they'd had to amputate a toe, but Frank the pigeon is out and thriving on the streets of Austin once again. That makes Spencer laugh, a sound that warms Liam from the inside out, making him relax as the NAVLE drifts further and further from his mind. They finish eating as Spencer starts talking about what they do out here, about weddings and camps they've hosted and how he likes to have at least one day a year where they open it up for hiking and catch and release fishing. He shows Liam where groups will set up tents, and talks about how they've thought about horseback tours if they get more horses, or maybe planting corn or pumpkins for fall, though they've never quite gotten around to doing that early enough. Liam just listens to him talk as they ride, hearing not only the words but the way that Spencer's brain works, the way he bubbles over with ways to make people happy and provide for the farm. He talks about the farmer's market every summer, about loyal customers, a girl who always comes to buy cheese curds with a tote bag that has a cow on it and a mom who's been buying milk from him since she was pregnant and now has a three year old. He talks about the woman who he's had a stall next to for two years, an alpaca farmer who sells fiber and will talk your ear off about spinning or felting and is always liberal with help for people new to the craft. She's got pictures of the alpacas for sale, and Spencer wants to see about doing that with the cows, and that's when Liam can add something useful.

"The shelter I used to work for has a local photographer who comes in and takes pictures for their website; I could get you connected with him for at least a few pointers if nothing else. He volunteered at the shelter to build his portfolio, so I'm not sure what his rates are for pictures, or the commercial licenses or anything like that, but he could be a good place to start. "

"That would be great; thank you. I... I feel like I have so many ideas for this place, though, and it's just finding the time to implement them, you know? Especially since Mom and Dad moved into town, it's... there's just not enough time in the day for everything we wanted to do."

"Well, hey, you can feel free to tell me no, but after this test, I’ll have some time and would love to come out and help if you need it. I don’t know how much help I’ll be, but just some manual labor and some basic animal care at least.”

"I'd like that," Spencer says, and his grin is genuine enough to sway any of Liam's fears that he's just doing it to be nice. "I don't know what we could pay you--"

"Pay me in outside time and home cooked meals and I'll be happy. I love places like this, and I really do love farm work. Let me be around the cows and the open land, and really, that's all I need. Well, that and maybe..." he hesitates a bit, but Spencer nods, and Liam says, "if you wouldn't mind having a puppy or a lamb or something out here sometimes? Just for a bit? I… we get orphans at work sometimes, and they always need more places to go. I wouldn’t want to make you do anything, but I could look after them, I just… I can’t have them in my apartment. My landlord won’t let me, and that’s not fair to them, either. I’m not asking you to become a sanctuary or anything, I know you’re a dairy farm, but maybe a rescue petting zoo could help at the farmer’s market or when you have schools come out to visit or something? And then we could take the babies somewhere else when they’re older, but just… they need more care when they’re babies, and a lot of places can’t do that.”

"I think we could make that work," Spencer says. He's got a hand resting on the pommel of his saddle, another scratching at the back of his neck, where he's somehow managed to get a mosquito bite despite being on bed rest all week. He'd complained about it at dinner, and Liam had to bite back a comment about how it might be because he’s so sweet. He can’t say things like that to Spencer, not like he would to Bell or some of his friends. “We could see about getting some calves in a petting zoo, too, and maybe Benjamin the donkey, since he doesn't really have a place to go right now. I don’t really know… you said you tend to get mostly babies?”

“Yeah; there are always orphan lambs and kids-- the goats, not like human children. Goats and sheep tend to have a bunch of babies at a time, so the moms can’t always look after all of them. And they’re not too hard to take care of, and really cute, so they could help draw people in the spring or for letting out day if you put up a petting zoo. And we get kittens; once I get somewhere that’ll let me I could foster them but bring them out if you have people coming, so they could play with and maybe even adopt them. I don’t want to make you look after my orphans or anything, and I swear I’d do the work, but just… there are so many babies who need a place like this, and if I could work and earn a little bit of space to raise them, I’d really appreciate it.”

“I think we could make some room,” Spencer says, grinning. “And it would be nice to have a vet around. I mean, it’s always nice having you around, but in case you didn’t feel like you’d be helpful. I… I'd really like having you out here more. When you weren’t coming out much, it was lonely.”

Liam grins at him, and they continue the tour, Spencer sharing about his plans for the farm and what he wants to do once he can get the funds and the time to do it. He’s one of the most dedicated farmers Liam’s ever seen, and there’s something beautiful about even just the way he moves around the farm. He’s relaxed out here, without the cows and the bills to stress him out, more like the Spencer who fell asleep in Annie's box or who posted selfies with friends on Instagram than the Spencer who's running a massive farm on his own. And all through the rest of the evening, there’s a little part of Liam thinking about spending more time out here, helping Spencer and showing it to Bell and really making it a part of his life. Bell will love it, if they get a chance she'd love coming out here with him and seeing the stream. He could take her swimming here, and even if he just planned on relaxing next to the pool she'd somehow get him into the water too, all playful kisses and enthusiastic love. Maybe Spencer would even come out, and laugh at how much Liam is at her beck and call, or maybe she'd be able to persuade him to get in the water, too, and the three of them would end up soaking wet and laughing.

It feels impossible. He's only here now because he's useful; Spencer will get sick of him before too long, and he’ll have to go back to spending most of his time at a crappy apartment in the city while he saves up for a spot he and Bell can call home. But still, at least for a bit, he gets to imagine that he could have a place here, and that feels special. Even as they finish their ride and he goes home to a pot of ramen and a late-night study session, his thoughts stray back outside Austin’s city limits, where he knows the cows are bedding down and the land behind the farm stretches for miles. When he finally drags himself to bed, he has just enough time to think about a little pen on that farm for animals he can foster, and ways Bell could help him, before he closes his eyes and is out like a light.

On AO3

You know that moment in Pride and Prejudice where Austen shows us/Elizabeth how much Darcy loves Pemberly as a way to show that he's a good dude? All I can say about this chapter is that the nature of humanity is that every now and then someone accidentally rewrites that scene.

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