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jetii · 3 months

Text

Home is a Place on Coruscant

Pairing: Captain Rex x fem!Reader

Words: 10,705

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! angst, hurt/comfort, discussion of grief/death, some description of blood/injuries, mutual pining, friends to lovers, smut, dirty talk, a little brat taming, oral sex (m and f receiving), penetration, unprotected sex, light exhibitionism but not really

Summary: You've always been there for Rex, and when he shows up at your door in the middle of the night after a devastating mission, you do what you do best: take care of him.

A/N: The start of this fic has been sitting in my notes app since the TCW season finale many moons ago, and it wasn't until I read this drabble by @djarrex that I felt compelled to actually finish it. Rex is my fav and he deserves to be taken care of.

It's been about a decade since I've published a fic and about a decade since I've been active on tumblr, so I decided to start from scratch with this blog. Feedback is very much appreciated! I have a few more drafts in the works for Echo, Howzer, Kix, Tech, and Hunter that I'm planning to publish depending on the reception to this one.

Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist

Rain on Coruscant was rare. But when it came, it came in torrents, and it came all at once.

In the early hours of morning, while the planet was still sleeping, the sky opened up and let loose a downpour that threatened to flood the lower levels. It was so heavy, it even drowned out the traffic noise coming from the speeders that were still flying over the city at the early hour. The noise was soothing, almost like a lullaby, and the sound of it woke you.

You were used to this sound. You were used to it, because you were used to not being able to sleep for more than an hour or two at a time. It was one of the many things about living in the Jewel of the Core Worlds that was taking you longer than you would have liked to adjust to.

The traffic noise, the bustle, the crowds—it all made your homeworld of Rion seem very far away. You could never hear anything over the speeder traffic here, and you likely would've gone mad long ago if not for the trickling of the fountain you kept in the main room. It had been your mother's. You were glad it had come with you when you moved.

The rain was heavy enough that you could hear it inside the apartment, a pleasant hum against the transparisteel. You sat in the window seat, arms folded around your knees, watching the rain fall. The view from your window was not the best in the Galactic City, but it was still quite good, and at night it was beautiful, all the lights of the skyscrapers blurring together in the rain.

The rain would be good for the plants.

You had a garden, a modest one. Some of the plants were native to your world. A few were native to Coruscant. Most were from other worlds. They were your pride and joy. Caring for them had given you something to do when you were adjusting to your new life here. You watered and pruned and tended to them all, and in the spring you were rewarded for your efforts.

Rex had been baffled, at first, by the sight of you out in the courtyard behind the complex, on your knees in the dirt, digging and weeding. It was a little piece of nature on a planet that didn't have much, and Rex was amazed that someone could take so much joy in something so… natural. It was nothing like what he'd been raised to appreciate, which was a good vantage point, a well-maintained blaster, and a plan.

When he'd told you as much, you had invited him to kneel down beside you, and, hesitantly, he'd done so. You handed him a spade and pointed to a patch of soil.

"See that little green leaf poking up?" you asked, and Rex followed your gaze. "See it?"

"I see it."

"Plant the spade right under it. When you pull it up, the root will come with it."

"Like this?" Rex had pulled the spade up, and a plant had come with it. He examined it, then tossed it aside, into the compost.

"That's perfect. That's just how you're supposed to do it. See, you're a natural."

Rex smiled, pleased with the praise. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. Now, let's get the rest of these weeds."

You'd worked in the garden until the sun was setting. Your hands had been dirty, and you had been smiling, and Rex had thought you were the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

He would probably never tell you as much. He'd been trying to think of ways to tell you, and nothing seemed good enough. There was nothing good enough for you. So instead he told you about the missions he went on. And you listened. You always listened.

You wondered if Rex had heard the rain start. You wondered if it was keeping him awake, too. You wanted him to sleep. He was always so tired, and the last thing you wanted was for him to be exhausted when he came home from his mission.

If he came home.

It was an irrational thought. The missions were dangerous, yes, but the 501st had some of the best soldiers in the galaxy. And Rex was a good captain. A good leader.

But there was always the possibility. The risk.

You were intimately acquainted with the feeling of waiting for someone, and the way it tore you apart. It was a risk, being this close to Rex and the other clones of the 501st. It was a risk, feeling the way you did.

It was a risk, but you did anyway.

You look out at the rain, and the speeders that still flew through it. You wonder how they could fly through the storm, and not be afraid.

You're just about to turn away from the window when a noise behind you makes you jump. There, underneath the sound of the rain battering against the transparisteel, the sound of a knock at your door. You almost don’t think it is real, that it's simply a part of the soundscape of the rainy morning, but it comes again, three short raps.

You slide out of bed, fumbling to grab the clothes you tossed on the floor the night before. You don't bother to put on pants, but pull a long shirt over your head and tiptoe to the door, peering through the peephole.

The rain is heavier now, and the clouds are dark, almost black. The white shape in the hall is familiar, though, and it makes your heart race. You open the door, filling the small entryway with the scent of fresh rainwater and humidity.

"Rex," you say. "What are you doing here?”

He’s stoic, still and silent under your gaze, but you can see the tremble in his hands at his sides. The downpour seems to have washed the majority of dirt and debris from his armor, but bits of red still run through the cracks. An hour ago, he was likely covered with whatever the substance was — Umbaran dust or something more sinister — but the rain did well enough to wash it off.

He must’ve walked here, you realize, eyes widening. Your bottom lip pulls to worry between your teeth as you notice the new dents and marks on him. Carbon scoring on his shoulder plate, a tear in his kama, and what seems to be a blaster hole in his chest plate.

"I… I don’t know," he says after a moment. His voice is quiet, rough through the modulation of his helmet. It's as if the words are being dragged up from his lungs.

"I shouldn’t have. I… I should have called. I just… I had to see you.”

The words hang between you, suspended like the raindrops in the air. You feel tears prickle at the corner of your eyes. You can't believe he's here. He's here, and he's alive. You'd known he would be, but to see him with your own eyes, to have him in front of you, fills you with an immense sense of relief.

But something is clearly wrong. He's not saying what's bothering him, and you're almost too afraid to ask.

“Rex, what happened?”

You reach for him, only to have your hand meet nothing but humid air as he pulls back.

“It’s late, sorry for disturbing you—“

He turns to go, and this time you’re faster. Your hand encloses around his wrist and pulls him to a stop before he can take another step.

“Wait, Rex— please, just… stay. Just for a moment. Come in, you're getting soaked."

He lets out a slow breath and then, after a moment, he jerks a stiff nod. He allows you to drag him inside your apartment and, as the door slides shut behind him, he lifts his hands to the seal of his helmet. You watch him closely as he pulls it free and reveals the face beneath.

There are smudges of grime on his golden skin, and a deep furrow has formed between his eyebrows. He looks haunted, as if the shadows from the battlefield have followed him home. You want to smooth that line out with your thumb, but you aren’t sure he will let you.

You don't ask if you can touch him, but he notices the way your fingers twitch, and he knows you well enough to know that you're thinking about it.

"It's fine," he murmurs. He's never said no to you. "Go ahead."

He doesn't say please, and that hurts a little, but you're not surprised. Rex has been holding you at arm's length ever since he kissed you a few months back, and you know why. You just wish you knew how to help him.

So, you touch him. You brush your fingers across his cheek, wiping away the grime. You know that he doesn't need to be cleaned, but the motions are soothing. Your gentle touch is a balm, and you can feel his tension ease ever so slightly as you brush your fingers over his face.

"What happened?" you ask again, voice barely above a whisper.

"A lot." He lets out a slow breath and leans a little into your touch. He's exhausted, and he's relieved to see you, and the two warring emotions are pulling him in different directions. Rex opens his mouth to say more, but the words die on his tongue. He shakes his head, unable to continue, and closes his eyes.

"Come sit down."

You take him by the hand and lead him over to the couch. You sit first, and he follows suit, sitting a respectable distance from you. The distance doesn't seem right. When you'd met him, Rex had been so full of confidence, even when he'd been a little bit awkward, a little bit unsure. But the war had changed him. He was still the same man, still confident and brave and intelligent, but the weight of responsibility had settled on his shoulders, and the burden was crushing him.

You want to tell him it's going to be okay. You want to say it, but the words sound hollow in your mind.

You shift, moving closer, and Rex moves, too. The distance between you shrinks, and the tension eases. You don’t much care that he’s wearing armor, or that the rainwater is leaving damp spots on the upholstery.

Rex reaches for you, and his hands tremble. His gloves are damp, and his armor is cold, and the chill sends a shiver up your spine when he touches your knee. His eyes are distant, and he doesn't quite meet yours, and his expression is so, so sad.

“Hardcase is gone,” he closes his eyes to avoid seeing the look on your face. You can’t help but gasp at the admission, and a soft sob slips past your lips.

You had met Hardcase once, very briefly. He had been charming and charismatic and kind, if a little wild, and you had liked him immediately. He had flirted with you, and Rex had rolled his eyes and tried to hide a smile behind his cup. Hardcase had been fun, and loud, and a little bit reckless.

You had not known him as well as some of the others on his squad, but the pain in Rex's eyes, the grief in his voice, was enough to make it hurt.

"Oh, Rex, I'm so sorry," you murmur.

Rex nods, and his jaw tightens. You can tell that he's trying not to cry, and you can't imagine how hard it must be, to carry such a heavy weight all by himself.

When he speaks again, your blood runs cold.

“We were betrayed. One of our own— one of the Jedi, he—" his breath hitches. “Oz, Ringo — Dozens of them, my brothers. They’re all gone.

"Betrayed?"

You feel like the bottom has dropped out from beneath you.

You knew the war was dangerous, and that Rex's job was dangerous, but the idea that it could go wrong in such a fundamental way?

The Jedi had always seemed so wise, and so strong, and so just. It had always seemed like there was nothing they couldn't do. To know that one of them could betray their men — could betray the Republic, and the innocent people of the galaxy — was too terrible to contemplate.

Your hand finds his cheek again, and this time, his eyes find yours.

They're shining, but his tears don't fall. He's a soldier, and he knows better than to show weakness, even here. You wish he would let himself break. You wish he would let you hold him, and let his tears fall, and let you help him put the pieces back together.

"Rex," you murmur, "I'm so, so sorry."

He leans into your touch, closing his eyes, and your thumb wipes away some of the wetness that has gathered there.

He pulls back for a moment, and you think he’s pulling away completely before he leans closer. His arms slide around your waist, pulling you tight to him as he buries his head in your shoulder. You immediately return the embrace, one arm over his shoulders while your other hand lifts to hold the back of his head.

You’re not sure how long they stay like that or how many tears are shed between you. After some time, he begins to speak, and you listen while running a soothing hand over his head, trying desperately to keep from sobbing outright as he tells you about the traitorous Jedi Pong Krell.

It’s by far the greatest atrocity you’ve ever heard, and to know that Rex has to put his helmet back on and get back to work in a matter of days makes you sick to your stomach.

He doesn’t deserve this, you think as you pull him into another embrace. None of them do.

Something about the motion causes him to wince, and you immediately release him to grab hold of both his shoulders.

“Are you hurt?” You ask, eyebrows knitting together in concern.

His hesitation is answer enough, and you can feel a wave of anger rise in your chest. How could they let him come back, in the state that he's in? How could they ask this of him, after all he's already done?

“I’m fine, cyare. Armor took most of it.”

If it weren’t for the way he avoided your gaze, you’d believe him, but instead you just feel yourself grow more upset. “What did Kix say?”

“Uh, he didn’t—“

“Rex, you were shot, and you didn’t think to get medical attention?”

His expression darkens, and you can see him withdrawing again. His shoulders pull back, and he pulls his chin up, and the distance between you grows again.

“I didn’t think much of anything, to be honest.” He mutters. It breaks your heart, but it also throws more coals on the anger burning inside of you. Not anger at him, you know, even though you can’t help but let out a sigh of exasperation. “I’ll be alright.”

“Like hell you will be,” you bite out before taking a step back to help him stand. “C’mon. Let’s get you patched up.”

You're angry. You're so, so angry. How could he let himself get hurt? How could he come here and not tell you about it? How could they send him home, to you, after all he's been through, knowing that he was injured?

But there's nothing you can do about any of that now, and being angry at him isn't going to help.

“You don’t have to—“ He protests through words only, allowing you to drag him through the living room and into the refresher.

“Yes, I do.” You shut him down quickly as you flick the light on and turn to rummage underneath your sink.

He’s still standing in the center of the room when you stand back up to full height, looking uncomfortable at your fussing. It’s not the first time you’ve had to patch him up, but so far it’s just been cuts and bruises. It’s unknown territory for you both, and he holds himself like he’s waiting for you to give up and shoo him out.

Your hands find his shoulders, and you gently push him down to sit at the edge of your bathtub. He’s pliant in your hold, but he meets your eyes with the worried pinch between his brows he gets whenever he thinks he’s upset you.

“Rex, let me take care of you,” you plead softly, and the furrow deepens.

He can hear the way your voice breaks. He can see the worry in your eyes. You're scared, and he hates that he's done that to you.

He should have known better. He should have taken a moment, to collect himself, before coming to see you. He shouldn't have let his emotions overwhelm him. He should have kept it together.

You were always there for him, and you listened, and he could tell you anything. He should have told you that he was okay. That would have been the responsible thing to do.

But he didn't. He couldn't.

And now, he can't seem to do the one thing you ask him.

But, after a moment, Rex relaxes. He’s never been able to say no to you before, and it is no different now. His shoulders slump a little, and the furrow smoothes, and you can't help but think that his face looks much nicer like this. You wish he wouldn't be so hard on himself.

"Okay," he murmurs.

It's all the encouragement you need. You lift his hand, cradling it gently, and begin to remove his gloves and armor piece by piece. You set the pieces aside, careful to keep them in order, and you know he appreciates that. It's a little thing, but it helps. You make a note to clean it for him before he leaves, the sight of the red smeared across its surface churning your stomach.

It's quiet between the two of you. The only sounds in the room are the rain and the gentle clink of plastoid against the floor as the last piece is removed.

You're grateful for the silence, though. You're not sure what you would say, and you know that he needs this, needs the moment to breathe.

"Where does it hurt?" You ask.

He hesitates. There's a lot of pain, all over his body. But you can't do anything about the pain that aches in his bones, or the ache in his chest. He doesn't know how to tell you about that.

"Chest," he finally admits. "Took a hit in the vest. Knocked the wind outta me."

That was an understatement, but you didn't need to know that. He could barely breathe, when it had happened, but the rest of his brothers needed him, and he didn't have the time to worry about his own injuries.

"Can you get it off?" You ask.

He gives a slight nod and reaches his arm up to grab the neck of his blacks, slowly pulling it overhead to reveal the skin underneath. Your eyes widen slightly at the sight of him, and you feel a flush rising up your neck and onto your cheeks.

The only light in the room is the faint glow from the bulb above the mirror. It casts shadows across the planes of his muscles, and you can't help but drink in the sight of him. His chest is strong and broad, and a line of hair disappears beneath the waistband of his blacks.

There's a blaster mark on his sternum, just above his right pec, not far off from the scar in the center of his chest he’d earned on Salucemi. It’s weeping blood slowly, trickling down the curve of his muscle, and you can see the red, puffy skin surrounding the injury.

It isn't terrible. A few inches to the left, and it could have been fatal. A few inches to the right, and the armor could have deflected the bolt entirely.

Still, you know that he's in pain, and the knowledge is enough to make the tears prickle at the corners of your eyes again. You force yourself to swallow them back and, instead, you reach for a damp cloth to wipe the wound clean.

He hisses at the contact, and you can see him grit his teeth against the pain. His hand moves to grasp the edge of the tub, and you can't help but feel guilty. You want to tell him to relax, to try and ease his suffering, but you know he wouldn't listen. He never listens, not when it comes to his own wellbeing.

"Sorry," you murmur, but the cloth keeps moving. You have to clean the wound, so you can treat it properly.

“Where’d you learn this, anyways?"

"What, first aid?" You're surprised by the question.

"Mhm."

“My dad was a swoop racer, believe it or not,” you say softly. You don't talk about him very often. It still hurts. But this feels like the right moment.

Rex tilts his head curiously, watching your face. You can see his expression soften, and you know he can tell how difficult it is for you to speak about this.

"Really?"

You nod, your eyes focused on your work. “My mom was always patching him up, and I’d sit on the counter and help out where I could. When she passed, I took over.”

“Isn’t swoop racing illegal?”

“Hm, not on Rion, it’s not.” You finish cleaning the wound and move to grab the bacta bandages. “Maybe if it was, he wouldn't have gotten himself killed."

You're not sure what possessed you to be so blunt, but the words are out, and there's no taking them back. Rex blinks, shocked by your honesty. You feel embarrassment creeping up the back of your neck.

"Sorry," you murmur, keeping your eyes low. "That was… I shouldn't have said that."

Rex says nothing. He knows better than to try and coddle you, and besides, you've always been the one doing the comforting, not the other way around. But it doesn’t sit well with him to see you like this, and before he knows what he’s doing, he reaches out to you.

His hand lifts, and he tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear. You can't help but lean into his touch. He's so warm, and his hand is calloused and gentle. He cups the back of your head, guiding you forward, and his lips press against your forehead.

You can feel the tears welling up in your eyes as the cloth slips from your fingers, and you cling to him. You feel terrible, for complaining about the loss of your father when Rex has lost so much.

"I’m sorry," he murmurs, and you're not sure if he means for asking or for Hardcase or for the war or for everything, and you can't bring yourself to ask.

“It’s alright,” you whisper back. He lets you pull away from him to busy yourself with sorting bacta patches, but you can feel his eyes on you.

"Is that why you came to Coruscant?” He asks softly, his tone careful and gentle.

Part of you wants to lie. You're tired, and you're hurting, and you're not sure you have the strength to have this conversation right now.

But the truth is already out, and if this will help him, you'll tell him anything.

You nod.

“He was actually really good at it,” you chuckle, and Rex can hear the bitterness in your voice. “But eventually he pissed off some powerful people who were placing the wrong bets. One day he left for a big race, and the next morning I found a box with his helmet at our doorstep. Or what was left of it.”

Rex sucks in a breath, and you can see his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. He knew about the helmet, he’s seen it on the shelf in your living room. But he hadn't known the full story.

You look back up at him. There are tears in your eyes, but they don't fall. You're smiling, and your eyes are sad, and his heart breaks.

“I tried to get the police involved, the racing league, anyone I could get to listen to me, but no one would investigate. I was so angry. Then I started getting threats. I couldn’t…” You shake your head, trying to rid the memories. "I couldn’t stay. So I moved here. And then the war started, and then I met you.”

It seems like a lifetime ago. The days before Rex felt like someone else's life, and you wonder how you ever managed without him. You'd been so lost, and so alone, and you'd felt like the universe was crashing down on you, and he'd pulled you out from underneath the rubble just by being there.

"I'm so sorry, cyar'ika," Rex murmurs.

You reach forward and gently lay a hand on his chest, pressing the bacta patch into place. His skin is soft beneath your touch, and you can't help but think, not for the first time, about how beautiful he is.

"I'm glad that you're here," you tell him softly. "That you made it back, I mean. I'm glad you came home."

Home. Rex swallows thickly.

He's never had a home before, not really. Home had been a word for people with families and futures. Home had been a word for normal, everyday people, not clones.

Home had always seemed like such a far away concept, something he'd never get to experience.

But, suddenly, the idea isn't quite so foreign. Home. With you.

"I'm glad I came back too," he finally murmurs, and his hand lifts to hold yours.

You're quiet, your eyes tracing the lines of his face, and his gaze finds yours.

There's something different between the two of you, something charged and heavy. You know you need to pull away. He needs to rest. You're both exhausted.

But you can't. You can't stop looking at him. He's beautiful, and he's kind, and he's the bravest person you've ever known. You've never loved anyone the way that you love him.

"Cyare," he whispers, and the word makes your heart stutter, even if you don’t know what it means.

He's not sure what comes over him. Maybe it's the way you're looking at him. Maybe it's the fact that, after the past couple of weeks, he thought he'd never see you again. Maybe it's that, for once, you're letting him take care of you. Maybe it's because you're so beautiful and you're so close and he loves you, he's so in love with you, and he doesn't know how much longer he can stand to go without saying something.

Whatever it is, he knows he needs to say something, and he knows he needs to do it now.

"I'm so glad I met you," he whispers, and it's the best he can do, but he hopes it's enough.

He reaches forward, and his hand finds the curve of your cheek, and the touch is enough to send a spark through your skin. You can feel the heat building inside of you, the desire pooling in your core, and the air in the room is electric.

"Me too," you manage.

His lips find yours.

You gasp against his mouth, and your arms wrap around his shoulders, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips. You're pulling each other closer, as close as you can possibly get, and it's not close enough.

Rex moans softly against your lips, and you can't help the way your hips twitch, or the way you whimper into his mouth. You're both desperate, and eager, and it's the sweetest relief.

He stands and turns, lifting you up and sitting you on the edge of the counter, and his body presses against yours. Your legs part, welcoming him, and his hips slot perfectly between them. His hands are on your thighs, gripping and pulling and massaging the flesh.

"Rex," you gasp, breaking away from his lips.

He takes the opportunity to press his lips against your throat, his tongue and teeth working the delicate skin. He sucks at your pulse point, and you whine. You know that there will be marks in the morning, but you can't bring yourself to care.

"Rex," you whine again, and you're not sure why, not exactly, because all you want is for him to keep doing what he's doing, to let him claim you and mark you and make you his. But you're overwhelmed, and you need to catch your breath, and his name is the only word your brain can think.

His fingers tighten, and his lips lift from your skin. He’s watching you with dark eyes and swollen lips, chest heaving.

"I need…" he trails off, and he doesn't finish the sentence, but you understand.

He's holding himself back. He doesn't want to push you, doesn't want to assume, but you can feel the need rolling off of him.

He's desperate.

You are too.

“Let me take care of you,” you whisper.

Rex sucks in a breath. There are a lot of things that he could say, but the only thing he can manage is your name, soft and needy, and you can hear the way his voice breaks.

The sound makes you ache.

Your hand finds his jaw, and your thumb runs along his bottom lip. He's looking at you with the most adoring eyes, and your heart feels like it's about to burst.

"Please," he breathes.

It's all the encouragement you need. Your lips find his, and his hands find your hips. He lifts you off of the counter and into his arms, and your legs wrap tightly around his waist. His fingers dig into the backs of your thighs, grabbing and holding and massaging the flesh. You're not sure how the two of you make it into the bedroom. All you can think about is Rex's lips, his teeth and tongue and hands, and the way he's carrying you like you weigh nothing, his hardness digging into your hip.

It's a miracle he doesn’t trip over the pile of dirty laundry on the floor.

His knees hit the mattress, and he leans down to lay you gently on the bed, his eyes never leaving yours. There's a tenderness to his actions, a sweetness in the way he handles you, that makes you shiver. His thumbs trace the lines of your hipbones underneath your shirt, and he smiles at the sound of your breath catching in your throat.

"Are you sure?" He whispers, and the words are enough to make you ache.

His hands are so gentle, his face so earnest. He's always been so careful with you, and it makes you feel like the most important thing in the world.

"Yeah," you whisper, your hand coming up to rest against the side of his face.

Rex's smile is so beautiful, and it's so full of joy, and you can't help but return it. He turns his head and presses a kiss into the center of your palm.

His lips move, tracing the lines on your palm. His teeth nip gently at the tips of your fingers, and he watches as your breath catches.

He wants to take his time, to learn every inch of you, to map out the places that make you moan and the ones that make you scream, and the ones that make you laugh. He wants to kiss the scars and worship the stretchmarks and the freckles, and the dimples in your skin, and the wrinkles in the corners of your eyes, and the birthmark on your shoulder, and he wants to show you how beautiful you are, how perfect, how special, how loved.

He'll do it, eventually. But not tonight.

Tonight, he just needs you.

His fingers dip underneath the hem of your shirt, drawing it up slowly, and he can't help the groan that falls from his lips at the sight of you. You're suddenly, painfully aware of the fact that you'd never put on pants when you answered the door, let alone a bra, and you're almost embarrassed.

But the way Rex is looking at you after your shirt is tossed aside makes your stomach flutter, and the words die on your tongue.

"Mesh'la," he breathes, his eyes wide.

He can't seem to decide where to look, where to touch first, so you grab his hands and guide them. They slide across the planes of your stomach and over your ribs, and his fingers ghost the underside of your breasts, and your head falls back onto the pillows.

"Rex," you beg. "Please."

The sound of your plea is enough to spur him into action. His lips find the side of your neck, and his hand cups your breast, thumb finding your nipple and swiping over it.

You gasp, your back arching and hips bucking into his, and Rex moans softly. His teeth graze the line of your pulse, and he moves lower, and he pulls a nipple into his mouth.

"Fuck," you whimper, your nails scratching at the back of his neck.

You can feel the smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. He likes having this effect on you.

The hand on your other breast is kneading the flesh, and his lips are sucking at your nipple, his tongue tracing patterns on the delicate skin. His fingers pinch and pull, and you can feel the heat building between your legs.

"So sensitive," he hums, and the vibrations from his words send a tingle down your spine.

"Only for you," you breathe.

The words make his hips stutter, and the hardness of his cock presses into the wetness of your core. You can feel the outline of him against you, the heat and the thickness, and your breath catches.

You roll your hips into his, and Rex releases a groan, his teeth sinking into the soft skin of your breast.

"Kriff," he hisses, and the sound sends a shock of pleasure through you. Suddenly, you remember your promise.

"Lay back," you whisper, and his head lifts.

"What?"

You push at his shoulders, mindful of his bandages as you urge him backwards, and Rex follows your command. You move quickly, kneeling between his legs and grabbing the waistband of his blacks. You can see the outline of his hardness straining against the fabric, and you can't help but lick your lips.

"Can I?"

Rex's chest is heaving, his eyes blown black, and you can tell he's trying to process your question.

"Cyar'ika," he breathes, and the endearment makes your heart flutter. "You don't have to."

"I know," you tell him, your hand moving slowly up and down his thigh. Your head tilts thoughtfully. "Can I be honest?"

"Always," he replies.

"I've wanted to for a while."

You can feel the blush creeping up the back of your neck, and your eyes dart away from his. You don't know why, it's not like you've been hiding your attraction, but something about telling him is making you nervous.

"You have?"

His voice is soft, and his hand finds the back of your head. His touch is so gentle, and the surprise and happiness in his tone makes you bold.

"Yeah," you murmur, looking back up at him.

He looks stunned, but there's a light in his eyes, a warmth that you can feel spreading inside you too. "Why didn't you say anything?"

You shrug. "I didn't want to push."

It's his turn to blush. It's cute, the way his cheeks flush, and his eyes dart away. He almost looks embarrassed.

"Since we're being honest…" He starts.

"What?"

"Me too."

Your heart stutters, and a wide grin stretches across your face. The happiness building inside your chest is competing with the desire that courses through you at the knowledge that he's thought about this, about you, and the idea is almost too much. You're sure you must look like a fool smiling this much, but you can't bring yourself to care.

"You've thought about it?" You tease.

"Yeah," he breathes. "All the time."

"Tell me."

He groans, his fingers tangling in your hair, and you can see the way his cock twitches at your words. "I… Kriff, I've imagined it so many times. How good you'd look on your knees, with my cock in your mouth, or bent over, with my hands on your hips, or straddling me, riding me."

"What else?"

You've moved closer to him, and his fingers tighten in your hair, and you can feel the wetness between your thighs. You've never felt so desperate, so needy, and all you want is him, any part of him.

"I think about it all the time. What it would be like to have you in the barracks, in the 'fresher, in the hangar. You on your knees in my office. Fuck, everywhere. It's all I can think about sometimes."

You can feel the wetness growing between your thighs, and you can't stop the whine that falls from your lips. It's almost too much, hearing the things he's imagined, the ways he's wanted you, the times and places, and the need and desperation behind his words.

"Then will you let me?" You ask, and you hope the answer is yes, because you can't imagine stopping.

"Please," he breathes.

"What was that?"

Rex's grip on your hair tightens, his gaze locked on yours as he speaks again, his voice is low.

"Please, cyare."

That's all the encouragement you need. Your eyes don't leave his as your hands pull at the fabric, slowly revealing his length. He's bigger than you dared to imagine, and thicker, and the sight of him is enough to make your mouth water.

His eyes are wide, his pupils blown, and his mouth is hanging open slightly. The blush on his cheeks is spreading down his chest, and the muscles in his arms are tensed.

"So perfect," you hum, and you're not sure if you're talking to him or his cock.

You wrap your hand around him, and Rex's hips stutter. Your thumb swipes over the head, spreading the bead of precum, and his eyes fall shut.

"So sensitive," you tease.

"Cyare," he warns. There's an edge to his voice, and it makes you grin.

Your head dips down, and you press a kiss to the underside of his cock, and his hips jerk. You keep pressing kisses along his length, your fingers wrapping around the base. Rex is struggling to breathe. He's not even inside of you yet, and it already feels better than anything he's ever experienced before.

He opens his eyes to look down at you, and the sight of you on your knees in front of him is almost too much. He's dreamed about this moment, and fantasized, and he never, not in his wildest dreams, imagined that it would feel like this.

Your lips wrap around him, and Rex can't stop the way his hips thrust up. His cock brushes the back of your throat, and you gag, pulling back slightly with tears in your eyes.

"Sorry," he gasps, his cheeks flushing.

You shake your head as much as you can with his length in your mouth, and your eyes flash up to his.

You like this, he realizes with a start. You like being used, you like the feeling of him fucking into you, and the realization sends a shock of pleasure through him.

You bob your head slowly, and Rex watches, transfixed, as his cock disappears between your lips. Your tongue runs along the underside, and his eyes fall shut again.

"Maker," he moans.

Your hand is stroking what doesn't fit into your mouth, and your other is tracing the lines of his thighs, and his abs, and his V-lines. You can feel the muscles tensing and relaxing under your fingertips, and you can see the way his hips are straining, the effort he's making to keep still.

Your name falls from his lips like a prayer, and you hum softly in response. His fingers tighten in your hair, pulling gently, and his other hand comes to rest on the back of your head.

"Fuck, mesh'la," he moans, and the praise makes you preen.

You pull back, until only the head is between your lips, and swirl your tongue around him. He tastes sweet and salty and just the right amount of bitter, and you can't get enough.

"So good," he gasps. "So perfect, so beautiful."

He's babbling now, the words falling from his lips without him thinking about them, and you can't stop the grin. You'd always wondered if he was a talker.

"So perfect, cyar'ika, taking me so well." His voice is wrecked, and his breath is coming in ragged pants. "Feel so good. I could fuck your mouth all night."

His words make you shiver. He could. He could do anything he wanted with you, and you'd let him.

You move your head down, taking him as far as you can, and Rex's eyes open to watch you. You hold his gaze as his cock slides along the back of your tongue and hits the back of your throat, and you suppress the urge to gag.

"So pretty," he hums, his voice strained. "Such a good girl."

Your pussy throbs at the words, and the moan you release vibrates his length.

"That's it," he gasps.

You can feel the tears pooling at the corners of your eyes, but you keep moving, keep taking him, and his grip on your hair tightens.

"So good, mesh'la, so, so good."

He's repeating the words, and you're not sure if he knows he's saying them. Your jaw is starting to ache, your lips are sore, and there's drool dripping down your chin, but you can't stop the soft whimpers and moans.

The sounds are enough to drive him mad.

His hand moves to cup your cheek, and his thumb runs along your bottom lip, stretched around him. The gesture is so tender and loving, it's almost too much.

"Look at you," he breathes. "Kriff, I've wanted this for so long. So beautiful. So perfect. My perfect girl. You take me so well."

You hum again, and his head falls back, the movement pushing his cock deeper. You gag around him, and his hips stutter, a litany of Mando'a spilling from his lips. You're not sure what he's saying, but the words are making your cunt clench, the pleasure building inside of you overwhelming.

"I'm close, mesh'la," he gasps. "If you want to stop, you'd better— ah, kriff!"

You've pulled back, and the suction of your lips is incredible. Rex's hips are stuttering, his hands are tugging on your hair, and the sounds falling from his lips are enough to make your core throb.

"Mesh'la, please, I can't—"

His words die in his throat as you reach between his legs and roll his balls in your hand. The action sends him hurtling over the edge, and his hips thrust up one last time, pushing his cock down your throat as he comes.

Your throat works to swallow every drop. It's so much, more than you were expecting, and you struggle not to choke. His grip on your hair is borderline painful, but you don't mind. You can feel his whole body trembling, his breathing labored and his chest heaving.

You release him with a wet pop, and he shudders. You press one last kiss to the underside of his softening length, and he twitches, his body still sensitive.

"You're gonna kill me" he breathes.

"Hopefully not." You wipe your mouth, thumb catching a stray drop of cum and sucking it into your mouth, and you watch as his eyes darken.

He pulls you to him, and you climb back into his lap, his lips on yours. The kiss is slow and lazy, his hands running up and down your back, his body still shuddering from the force of his orgasm.

"Mesh'la," he sighs against your lips, his breath hot and heavy. "So beautiful."

His fingers trail down the side of your neck and between your breasts. They ghost the skin of your stomach and dip underneath the hem of your panties, and you can't help the whimper that escapes.

"Still want me?" You ask.

"Always."

His lips are on your neck, and his fingers find the wetness between your thighs, and you gasp. The noise that falls from his lips is filthy.

"Fuck, cyar'ika," he groans. "You're soaked."

"That's your fault," you manage.

His teeth graze your pulse, and his fingers brush against your clit, making your hips buck.

"Can't help it," you gasp.

You can't stop the cry of pleasure as his thumb presses down. His touch is gentle, almost hesitant, and you're not sure why. You've made it perfectly clear that you want this.

"Rex," you whimper. "Please."

He presses another kiss to your lips, and the hand not between your thighs wraps around your back, holding you steady. He teases your entrance, and your breath catches, and then his fingers are slipping inside.

"Ah, fuck," you hiss.

You're so wet, so slick, and his fingers slide in easily. Just two fingers already feel so thick, and you can feel your walls stretching around him. There's a dull ache, but it feels so good.

"Cyar'ika," he groans. "Fuck, so tight."

His fingers pump in and out slowly, and your head falls onto his shoulder.

"Faster," you gasp. "Please, Rex."

"Shh," he coos. "Patience, mesh'la."

"Please."

"Be a good girl and be patient for me."

You whine, the sound muffled by his shoulder. He's being cruel, teasing you like this. You've already had him once, and now he's drawing it out. "Rex, I need you."

He hums softly, pressing a kiss to your temple. His fingers are still pumping in and out, slowly, agonizingly, and you know he's doing it on purpose.

"I need you," you whimper.

"I'm here," he whispers.

"No, I— ah! I need you inside me."

You can feel his breath catch, and his fingers stutter, and then his lips are at your ear.

"How do you want me, mesh'la?"

"Like this," you breathe. "I want to ride you."

His breath hisses through his teeth, and his fingers speed up. The change in pace is enough to make your head spin, and the noises coming from your mouth are embarrassing. You sound desperate, and you are.

"Fuck, Rex."

"So good," he hums. "Such a good girl."

A third finger slides in beside the other two, and the stretch makes your back arch. You're not sure when he had the chance to slick his fingers with your wetness, but he must have. He's not hurting you, and the feeling is incredible.

"Rex, I'm gonna—"

"Not yet," he cuts you off.

"Please, I need to—"

"You'll wait," he growls, and the command is enough to make your toes curl.

"Please," you beg. "I'll be good, I promise, just—oh!"

Your plea is cut off by a sharp cry of pleasure, and your walls flutter around his fingers, your hips rocking back and forth.

"I said not yet."

"I'm sorry," you gasp, and the words come out strangled. "I couldn't help it, you feel so good."

He hums, his thumb finding your clit, and the stimulation is almost too much. His lips find yours, and his free hand holds you steady as his fingers move inside of you.

You writhe on top of him, your legs shaking, and you can feel the pleasure building in the pit of your stomach, and it's all too much.

"Please," you beg, and you're not even sure what you're asking for.

"What do you need?"

"Please," you gasp.

"Use your words, cyar'ika. What do you need?"

"I need— ah! I need you. I need more. Please."

He's torturing you, you realize. He's doing it on purpose, making you beg, punishing you for how you teased him earlier, and the thought of it makes your cunt throb.

"You've been so good for me, mesh'la. You think you've earned it?"

"Yes," you hiss. "I'll be good. Please, Rex, I'll be a good girl."

He can't say no, not when you're looking at him like that. Not when your lips are parted and your cheeks are flushed, and the look in your eyes is so desperate.

"Okay," he concedes.

You let out a sound of relief, and his fingers are slipping out of you. He brings his fingers to his lips and sucks them into his mouth, and the action is enough to make you groan. You rise off of him, legs trembling, and hurriedly push your panties down and toss them aside.

He looks up at you, and there's awe in his eyes, a reverence, as his hands settle on your hips to guide you back to him. Your hand wraps around his cock, lining him up, and the two of you gasp as his head breaches your entrance.

"Take your time," he whispers. “You don’t have to—fuck!”

You sink down, taking him fully in one smooth motion, and Rex can't stop the low, guttural moan that escapes.

"You said to take my time," you say, and there's a cheeky lilt to your voice. He opens his mouth to argue, but the words die in his throat. "So I took my time."

You can't stop the grin. The look on his face is almost too much. His cheeks are flushed, and his chest is heaving. His lips are swollen from the kisses, his eyes wide and his pupils blown. He looks good like this, you think, and you've never seen him so undone.

"Cyar'ika," he finally manages.

You hum, circling your hips, and his grip on you tightens. Your pace is slow, savoring this feeling unlike anything you've ever experienced. He's bigger than anything you've ever had inside of you before, filling you in ways you didn't even know were possible. You're still adjusting to him, and your movements are slow, but they're steady, and you can't help the soft whimpers and gasps.

Rex is struggling to breathe. Your heat is so warm and so wet, your walls are clenching around him, and the sight of you is almost too much. The way your head is tipped back, your eyes closed and your mouth open, the sounds you’re making, and the way his cock is disappearing inside of you over and over again, it's all so much. He can't believe this is happening.

He leans forward to press a kiss to your throat, his teeth grazing your pulse. You gasp before pushing on his shoulders, and his back hits the mattress. You lean over him, your hands reaching to grasp the headboard, and the new angle makes the both of you exhale. It also makes your breasts hang tantalizingly in his face.

Rex is not one to waste an opportunity.

He leans up and closes his lips around one of your nipples, and the sensation is enough to make your hips buck. Your pace speeds up, and his hands grip your hips tightly, helping to guide you.

"Oh, kriff," you gasp.

He releases your nipple with a pop and moves his attention to the other, and the sound you make is almost enough to make him come right then. He can’t help but shift his hips, moving them up and down in time with your thrusts, and you pull away from him to give him a look of warning.

"Stay still," you order.

"Or what?"

You raise an eyebrow, and Rex shivers. You're not sure what makes him react like that, but it sends a rush of heat straight to your core.

"I'll stop."

His jaw drops, and his eyes widen. "You wouldn't," he says.

"That’s an order, Captain," you say, and his cock twitches inside of you. You can't help the wicked smile. You’re learning a lot about him today.

"You're the worst."

"You love it," you retort.

His hands move to your waist, and he pulls you closer.

"I love you," he breathes.

You can feel yourself clench around him at his words, and he hisses through his teeth.

"Say it again."

"I love you."

Your lips meet his, and his tongue slides into your mouth as his hands roam your body. You can feel his heart beating wildly in his chest, his lips are warm, and his breath is hot, and his body is so close to yours, the feeling is overwhelming.

He's everything.

"I love you," he says again, his voice hoarse.

"I love you, Rex."

"I never thought I'd hear you say that."

"It's true," you gasp.

His hips stutter, and you pull away, giving him a look of warning, and his jaw clenches.

"Sorry, cyar'ika. I couldn't help it."

"I know."

"Let me make it up to you."

"Wh— ah!"

You cry out as his fingers find your clit, and your walls flutter. The movement sends pleasure shooting through you, and your legs shake, the pace of your hips unsteady.

"That's it," he coos. "Come for me."

"Not yet," you gasp. "Need you to— oh, fuck, Rex."

His hips snap up, meeting your thrusts, and the new pace is relentless. He's chasing his own release, and you're right there with him. You can't take it anymore.

"Please, please, I can't—"

"Go ahead," he urges.

You can't stop the cry that tumbles from your lips. You can feel the orgasm building, and your hips are bucking wildly.

"I can't—I can't," you sob.

"Come for me, cyar'ika. Come on my cock."

The words are enough to send you over the edge, and he swallows your cries of pleasure. You're trembling above him, your nails are digging into his skin, and the pressure of his fingers against your clit is enough to make your hips jerk.

"Kriff, I can feel you," he breathes. "Your little pussy is squeezing me so tightly."

"Please," you beg. You're not even sure what you're begging him for.

All you know is that he feels so good, and you're so sensitive, and the sensations are too much and not enough.

"That's it," he murmurs. "Good girl."

"I can't, I can't, I can't-"

"Shh, shh, it's okay."

He's so gentle even as he sets a brutal pace, his hips snapping up to meet yours. You can feel the head of his cock hitting the end of your channel, and his fingers are rubbing frantic circles around your clit.

The pressure is almost painful, but it feels so good.

"Oh, fuck, Rex," you cry out.

"Come again," he demands.

"I can't," you protest. "It's too much."

"You can," he counters. "Do it for me."

The words send a thrill through you, and you can feel the pleasure building. Your walls are fluttering around him, your hips are bucking, and you can't control the noises coming from your lips.

"That's it," he growls.

Your orgasm washes over you, and this time it's stronger, tears spilling over as his name falls from your lips over and over again. You can feel your release gushing out of you, coating his cock and the sheets below.

The sight is so filthy, but it only seems to spur him on. Rex grips your hips tight enough that you know you’ll bruise, and the thought sends another thrill through you. You want him to leave his mark. He fucks up into you with a force that has the headboard slamming against the wall, and his thrusts are losing their rhythm.

"I'm so close," he breathes.

You're barely coherent, but you can't help but latch on, his words sending another rush of heat through you. "You gonna come for me, Captain?"

He shudders, and his eyes flutter shut, his mouth opening and closing soundlessly. He can't find the words.

"You've been so good for me," you purr breathlessly. "Let go."

You can see the tension leaving his shoulders, his jaw slack. His breath is coming in shallow gasps, and his thrusts are unsteady. He's teetering on the edge, and all it takes is a few more words from you.

"Fill me up."

"Cyar'ika," he warns.

"Do it," you order.

"Fuck, cyar'ika," he breathes. "Oh, fuck, I'm coming, I'm—"

He curses, his head falling back against the pillow, and his cock pulses as he spills inside of you, his hands tight on your hips to hold you down. You can feel the warmth of his seed filling you, and the sensation is enough to make the corners of your vision darken.

"I can feel it," you murmur. "I can feel you, kriff, Rex."

He groans, his arms pulling you down, and you collapse against his chest. You're not sure how long you stay like that, just holding each other. You can't feel anything except him, his hands running up and down your spine, and his lips pressed to the top of your head.

“So,” you say after a while, and he can hear the smugness in your voice.

You tilt your head, and the look he gives you is withering.

"Don't start," he warns.

"Captain, huh? I didn't know that was your thing"

"That's not—"

"What? You don't want to talk about the fact that your cock gets hard when I call you Captain?"

On cue, the appendage in question twitches, and Rex closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "It's not— ugh, kriff," he mutters.

You can't stop the laughter that bubbles up.

"You're cute when you're embarrassed," you coo.

"Don't patronize me," he says, but the words have no heat behind them.

"I'd never dream of it, sir."

You can see the blush rising in his cheeks, and his eyes darken.

"That's an order," he grumbles.

You lean up, brushing your lips against his, and the touch is soft and gentle. He melts into it, his hands resting on your waist.

"Yes, Captain," you say.

"I can't—kriff. You can't say things like that, mesh'la." His expression is pained, and the sound that escapes him is almost a whine.

"You're right," you agree. "I can do better."

He raises an eyebrow, and his jaw drops as your fingers wrap around his wrist. His eyes follow the motion as you pull his hand between your thighs. You let out a satisfied moan as his fingers dip between your folds, and he can't tear his gaze away from the sight of his seed dripping from your cunt when his softening cock slides out of you.

"You're a mess," he says reverently.

"I'm a mess because of you."

He hums, his fingers gathering some of his spend and sliding it back into you.

"Is this what you were imagining, Captain?"

He shudders at the title, and his hips cant, his cock stirring to life.

You can't help the grin. "It is, isn't it?"

"You're terrible," he growls.

"Oh, I'm not terrible. I'm the best you've ever had."

He lets out a breathless laugh. "You're the only one I've ever had," he admits.

You pull back, staring at him in surprise, and the look on his face is unreadable.

"Are you— are you serious?"

"Of course I'm serious," he says, brow raised.

"But--"

"Cyare, I've only ever wanted you." His words are simple, and they're said with a conviction that steals the breath from your lungs.

"Oh."

You're speechless. You're not sure what you'd imagined the past few months. You're not even sure if you'd ever given much thought to it, but the idea that you're the only person who has ever made him feel like this is dizzying.

"I've loved you for a very long time," he confesses, and the words make your heart ache. "I never thought—kriff, I never thought you'd feel the same."

"I love you," you say firmly. "So much."

He grins, and the smile is so wide that his cheeks are dimpling. You can't resist. You lean down to kiss him again, and the way he holds you, like you're the most precious thing in the world, makes the feeling in your chest bloom.

"I'll say it every day for the rest of our lives, if that's what you need," you say.

"Don't make promises you can't keep," he murmurs.

"I wouldn't," you promise.

He stares at you for a moment, his gaze intense, and his grip tightens. You can see him steeling himself, and the words he speaks make you shiver.

"Good, because I intend to marry you someday."

"Someday," you echo. You're not sure if you believe him, if that's even possible for you, but you believe that he believes it.

"When the war is over," he confirms. "When the fighting is done, and we've finally got a chance at peace, I'll give you the galaxy, cyare. And a family, if you want one."

"Rex, I—" You swallow thickly, and he can see the emotions flickering across your face. His fingers are drawing shapes on your hip, and his eyes are locked with yours.

"I'm not asking for an answer now," he says gently. "I just— I want you to know how serious I am."

You nod, and the silence that stretches between you is heavy.

"You really mean it," you finally say.

"Of course I do."

"What happens if—"

"There is no 'if.'" His tone leaves no room for argument, and he shifts, sitting up. The new position brings you into his lap, and your knees are straddling his waist. He rests his forehead against yours, and his breath fans across your face.

"Whatever happens, we'll face it together."

"Together," you murmur.

"I'm with you. Always."

You close the distance, kissing him softly. It's nice, holding him like this. The feeling of his arms around you is enough to drive the fears from your mind, pushing them to the furthest corners. You can feel yourself relaxing, the tension leaving your shoulders, and his hands roam your body, exploring every inch.

"You know," you begin, your voice quiet, and your lips brush against his with every word. "I'm still waiting for a tour of the barracks, Captain. Oh, the hangar too."

His breath hitches, and you can feel him starting to harden again under you.

"Cyare," he breathes.

"I'd love to see your office," you continue, and his eyes darken. "You can give me a private tour, just the two of us. I'll wear a skirt, and you can bend me over your desk."

His cock is fully erect now, and he can't stop the groan.

"And the showers," you purr, gently rotating your hips. "I bet they're big. Just big enough for the two of us. We could get the water nice and hot, and I could drop to my knees..."

"Kriff," he swears.

"Or…"

He's breathing heavily, his fingers digging into your skin.

"We could do that now," you offer.

"Cyare." His tone is pleading, and the sound sends a thrill through you. You can feel the ache building between your legs, and your thighs are sticky.

"I'm already dripping wet," you whisper.

"That's it."

He moves so fast that it makes you yelp, and the next thing you know, he's on his feet, carrying you, and your legs are wrapped around his waist. He walks swiftly towards the 'fresher, and the feeling of him sliding against your core makes you shudder.

"You're going to be the death of me, cyare," he murmurs.

"Maybe," you concede. "But I think we can agree that it'll be a great way to go."

The door slides shut behind him, and the sound of his laughter is enough to make you melt.

"A great way to go," he echoes.

You know the path ahead of you is treacherous. You know there will be more battles, and more losses, and more nights where you're unable to sleep. You know there will be pain, and fear, and sorrow.

But there will be hope too, and joy, and happiness. A home, and a family, and a future.

It will be worth it.

#captain rex x reader #rex x reader #star wars #the clone wars #captain rex #captain rex x you #rex x you #clone x reader #clone smut #x reader #clone captain rex #i literally had a dream about rex last night so it's time to pull the plug and post this #roy writes

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freesia-writes · 2 months

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Originating from this post, I'd like to offer a list of longfics featuring TCW/TBB characters for those of you looking for some good reads! Feel free to drop any others into my asks! Fics are general audience or PG-13 unless noted "Mature" at the end.

The links are mostly to the post with the authors' descriptions so you can get a better idea of what each one is about!

Crosshair

Sharp Edges - @spicy-clones and @lightwise - Crosshair x F!Reader - Mature

Quiet Corners of the Galaxy - @badbatchposts - Crosshair x OC plus Batch/others - Mature

When the Order Fell - @victimofdavefiloni - Crosshair x OC - Mature

Caught in the Crosshairs - @silverwings22 - Crosshair x OC - Mature

Half-Moon Glow - @moonstrider9904 - Crosshair x OC; TCW AU - Mature

Roasted, Brewed, and Served with Attitude - MelMorganne99 - Crosshair x OC in Modern Police AU

It Never Rains - @letsquestjess - Crosshair x OC

Sunflowers and Blasters - @523rdrebel - Crosshair x OC

Only What Burns You Back - @the-little-moment - Crosshair x OC - Mature

Tech

Tech and Vel - @freesia-writes - Tech x OC

Song of the Sea - @silverwings22 - Tech x Alien OC - Mature

Tech as a Father - @missfrieden - Tech and Batch

Gravitation - @moonstrider9904 - Tech x OC AU - Mature

Meltdown - @autistic-artistech - Tech x OC - Mature

Brother, Hold Me Up - @lifblogs - Tech, Batch, Others - Mature

The World Goes Cold - @lifblogs - Tech, Batch - Mature

Hunter

Beyond the Shadow of a Doubt - @freesia-writeswrites - Hunter x OC

Hunter and the Librarian - @clonethirstingisreal - Hunter x OC - modern day AU

Sun and Rain - @photogirl894 - Hunter x OC

As Iron Sharpens Iron - @arctrooper69 - Hunter x Reader

Echo

Not Just the Carcass, But the Spark - @the-little-moment - Echo x OC - Mature

Test Subject/System Upgrade - @just-here-with-my-thoughts - Echo and the Batch

Rex

Captain's Log - @rexxdjarin - Rex x OC - Mature

Wolffe

I Yearn, and So I Fear - enigmaticexplorer - Wolffe x OC - Mature

The Wolfpack Queen - @reader6898 - Wolffe x OC - Mature

No Strings Attached and Walk Me Home (sequel) - @cyarbika - Wolffe x F!Reader - Mature

Multiple Featured Characters

Rise of the Clones - @AmberOwl24 - SO MANY CHARACTERS!

Stars Beyond Number - @dystopicjumpsuit - Clone Rebellion Echo x Riyo, Gregor x OC - Mature

The Moonwalker Series - @moonstrider9904 - Batch x OC (love triangle then single pairing) - Mature

Line of Destiny: A Series - @ilikemymendarkandfictional - Multiple Stories: Rex x OC, Crosshair x OC, Clone OCs and Howzer

Same Heart - @dumfanting - F!Reader x TCW Echo, then Fives, then Echo/Cross Poly - Mature

Blood Daughter - @letsquestjess - OC + Bad Batch Adventure

A Lupe of Faith - @lonewolflupe - Jedi!OC x Fives, later x Hunter - Mature eventually

Stronger Together - @cloneflo99 - Rex/Crosshair x OC - Mature

Other Clones

Quantum Entanglement - @freesia-writes - Howzer x OC

Martyrs and Kings - @dystopicjumpsuit - Post-Stasis Kix x OC - Mature

The Only Exception - @starqueensthings - Howzer x OC - Mature

Disillusioned - @amberskyyking - OC + OC Clone Squad Adventure - Mature-ish

The Helmeted Hunter - @jedimasterlenawrites - Boba Fett x F!Reader - PG-13

Children of Providence - @ladysongmaster - Din Djarin, TCW Characters Adventure

The Last Word - @ariadnes-red-thread - Fives x OC

One Step at a Time - @wild-karrde - Clone OC - Mature

Welcome to the Outpost - @just-here-with-my-thoughts - Mayday!!

#the bad batch #tbb #the clone wars #tcw #clone wars fanfiction #clone wars fic #clone wars fanfic #tcw fic #tcw fanfic #tcw fanfiction #tbb fic #tbb fanfic #tbb fanfiction #star wars fanfic #star wars fanfiction #star wars fic

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djarrex · 6 months

Text

burning hot

Howzer x f!reader | Fireball x f!reader | Howzer x reader x Fireball

ao3 | masterlist

The senator you work for assigned you to go to the clone base on Teth, where your primary job as a relations specialist has you venturing outside the job description.

It's been a while - but I just couldn't get these two out of my head. spoilers for the bad batch s3e6&7. 18+ only. explicit. oral. piv. a hint of creampie and a sprinkle of light choking. everything is consensual. almost getting caught. getting caught a little. after care and mention of the color system. a little bit of a threesome. I don't ship clones. no love triangle. reader is f! but no physical description is mentioned. It's been a long time since I've had to tag anything so please let me know if I need to add something. not gonna add user tags because I don't know who's out there anymore lol. enjoy the 10.5k words of smut with plot :)

Never would you have thought you’d one day travel to Wild Space, and yet here you are, just having entered the purplish atmosphere of a planet called Teth. You’re not traveling alone, though; you’re surrounded by a couple security guards of the senator you all work for, along with a few clones, although these particular clones are not soldiers of the Empire; they’re fighting back just as your Senator is, among a few others who remain in office. Your job is one that your Senator has entrusted to you when this all began, which is to facilitate communications and gather information for your office. Essentially, you speak with the clones about their experiences with the Empire, and see if there’s anything there that would help their case in the Senate, and eventually, to hopefully cast a light on the Empire’s crimes.

“We’re almost to the landing zone,” the pilot, a clone named Gregor, calls. Through the transparisteel you see the abandoned Monastery come into view, sitting atop a steep, mountainous pillar. Apparently, this is where the clones have set up their operations – their base. You figure it’s a good location because of how remote it is, being way out in Wild Space where the Empire’s shadow does not reach.

As the doors open and the ramp lowers, you see the several men who have been awaiting your arrival at the landing zone. Most of them, the ones who surround the pathway with their blasters held at ease, are in their helmets – but there are two clones in front of you without their helmets, one you quickly recognize as the Captain Rex.

You blink.

You know the other helmetless man, his hairstyle exactly the same as it was the day he was rescued, though now he’s in a full kit of armor, strapped with weapons. Your heart does a little flip at the sight of him. He looks good, you note. Healthier than the day you met him, and judging by the operation they have going on here, he’s been keeping busy.

Debarking the ship, you follow closely behind your security. You try not to linger too long on the giddiness you feel of seeing him again, but as you’re walking by, you see his eyes briefly widen with the realization of who you are.

He remembers you.

You first met Captain Howzer several months back, on the day he was rescued. Tagging along with your boss and security, you finally were able to meet the men who were the talk amongst the office: The rogue clones who were fighting back against the Empire. The garage in the lower levels of Coruscant was filled with these clones, some who were recently rescued and the ones who’d already been in the fight. On the day you met Howzer, you were getting to know the men who’d just been rescued that very day–him being one of them–by hearing their stories and gathering as much information as you could for your office, jotting down anything of note that could help the clones’ case in the Senate.

When you spoke with their captain, Howzer, you could tell he was angry – resentful. He told you all about how he’d been arrested back on Ryloth for merely opposing an order that was just plain wrong. Dissidence. He’d been arrested with several of his men who’d laid down their arms in solidarity, only to have been rescued with a saddening two who’d survived the year-long imprisonment.

The two of you spoke for what felt like hours – long after the garage had cleared out of visitors and others had fallen asleep. You weren’t sure what it was – but you were feeling a pull – one that brought you closer and closer to him until the both of you felt the unspoken. He was flashing you a look – and that’s what did you in.

Howzer fucked you in a supply closet that evening.

It was quick and desperate. Howzer had you pinned to the back wall of that supply closet just moments after he'd followed your invitation inside. As you quickly worked your bottoms off, Howzer's desperation was blatant, his cock straining against those tight gray pants he'd been wearing since the rescue. His hands were quick and his movements were sloppy yet he still was able to expertly find every little thing that got you off. At one point, Howzer had you bent over the counter of a shelving unit, roughly pounding you from behind with his hand pressed against your mouth. His normally perfectly styled hair was falling out of place, strands hanging down his sweat-slicked forehead. He had you seeing stars quicker than you’d anticipated, and when he was nearly at his own climax, he pulled out of you and finished off into the palm of his hand, punctuating the moment with a slap to your ass and a soft, breathy kiss to your temple that juxtaposed it all.

You’ve been working alongside clones for over a year now–since your boss had decided to covertly join the fight–and you’ve gotten to meet many of these familiar yet unique faces. It’s never been the way it was with Captain Howzer, though – not that you’re looking for that. However, since meeting him that evening, you always had the teeniest of hopes that you’d see him around again.

And now, several months later, you’ve run into him here on Teth.

You try to hide your growing smile by pressing your lips together and looking down at your feet as you walk. His boots fall in line behind you, and not even several steps later, he clears his throat.

“Remember me?”

His voice comes from behind you, gruff and playful at the same time, loud enough for only you to hear. You turn your head to the side to catch a glimpse of him from where he’s following behind you, his lips quirked at the corners.

You keep your voice low, glancing behind you as you walk. “Captain Howzer,” you greet simply.

He hums.

“Almost didn’t recognize you without the Imperial prison uniform,” you add.

Howzer lets out a wry laugh. “Felt real good to finally get out of those grays,” he tells you. “Felt even better to get back into my armor again.”

The group pauses, the leaders awaiting the doors to open.

“Glad to see you’re doing better,” you add, turning to face him fully. “This is quite the operation you guys have going on here.”

You swear you see Howzer briefly check you out, subtly eyeing you from head to toe. He grins. “So, what brings you here?”

“A job for the Senator. Apparently I’m good at getting you clones to share your stories and experiences.”

It’s the truth–that’s why you were assigned here for a while–but you’re also laying down little hints, something you know isn’t very professional of you but Howzer’s already reeled in.

He laughs at that, picking it up quickly. “I’ll say. I’d be happy to share even more with you.”

Barely minutes into a conversation with him and you’re already getting worked up, heat building in your lower stomach. “And I’d be happy to listen, Captain. That’s what I’m here for, after all.”

Howzer pitches his voice even lower. “How long will you be here for? You know, to listen?”

“Oh, that depends on how much you lot have to share.”

The same look appears in his eyes from your interaction all those months ago – the look that led the two of you into that supply closet. Even as the group continues inside, you can still feel his eyes on you.

“Once you’re settled, ma’am,” he says just a little louder, playing the part, “I’d be happy to brush you up on our progress here. For the Senator, that is.”

You once again fight to hide your knowing smile. “I’d be happy to listen, Captain Howzer. I’ll find you once I’ve settled in?”

He exhales deeply, a sly grin on his lips. “How about I give you a tour of the place first?”

Impatient.

But, honestly, so are you.

You look to your security and they nod in unison, and they step off to the side with a group of clones who are huddled over by the scanners.

You follow Howzer all the way to a seemingly unused doorway. He pushes it with some force to get it to budge, opening it up to the stairwell spiraling against the inner walls of the spire. The only lighting within the stairwell comes from the torch he just clicked on, and he takes your hand, guiding you down the spiraling steps until reaching the next platform. He sets the torch down and holds your shoulders, and you pull yourself closer to him.

“You know what’s been on my mind since seeing you come off the ship?” Howzer slips his hands under your shirt, teasing his way up to your chest. You gasp at his touches, legs already feeling like jelly.

“Tell me.”

He leans in. “How good you felt wrapped around my cock.”

You can tell just how wet you are already, and after waiting so many months to see him again, you’re growing impatient.

“I’m having a hard time remembering that,” you tease. “Maybe you could jog my memory?”

Even in the dim light you are able to see just how dark Howzer’s eyes get, the shadows of his face deepening with the expression of lust etching in his handsome features.

“Get your clothes off. Now.”

You start with your bottoms, pulling them off leaving yourself completely bare and exposed to the chilled air of the stairwell. Howzer doesn't take the time to remove all of his armor, only focusing on the parts that would get in the way. Before you can remove your shirt, Howzer stops you, his cock already hardened and in his hand.

“That’s good for now,” he orders breathily. Back against the stone wall, you bend your leg at the knee and Howzer takes it to hold against his armored hip as he guides his cock between your legs.

“You’re so wet,” he comments in a voice far too deep. He nudges into you, and the feeling was an incredibly missed one. “Gonna take me so well, baby. Just like you did before.”

“Howzer…”

“Hang on to me.”

You wrap your arms around his neck and Howzer hoists you up, effectively impaling you on his cock in the process. You cry out, the sound echoing throughout the stairwell.

“Gotta be a little quieter than that,” he chuckles confidently. “I haven’t even moved yet, pretty girl.” He kisses you then, his lips too soft for what you know is to come. “Promise me you’ll stay quiet. Can’t have anyone hear us down here.”

“Promise.”

With your back pressed against the wall and your entire lower half suspended in air by Howzer’s strong grip, you press your lips tightly together, and nod to give him the go ahead.

Howzer adjusts his grip and starts to move. He snaps his hips roughly, creating repetitive echoes of the sounds throughout the stairwell. Armor on skin. It’s only slightly uncomfortable, but you’re too lost in the feeling of him fucking you again to care about anything else. Your head falls back against the stone wall but Howzer won’t have that.

Between heavy breaths, he brings you back. “Eyes on me.”

When you meet his eyes again, you start to crumble. Even in this state they’re still such a soft, inviting brown, and you practically allow yourself to drown in them as you both near the finish. He sets you down on shaky legs, and turns you around. You present your ass to him, arching your back the way you know he likes. Howzer chuckles at that and quickly lines himself up to enter you again.

“Gonna paint this pretty ass,” he promises through gritted teeth.

The change of angle sends you into a frenzy, only this time, you’re able to cover your mouth.

The way Howzer fucks you is so needy and frantic, everything that was pent-up driving the way he snaps his hips and grips your skin. You can feel him everywhere – consuming you. Your body starts to shake when your orgasm hits and Howzer can feel it – it affects the speed of his movements with how tight you start to clench around him.

“Fuck – that’s it – so tight.” He groans – a syrupy rumble in his throat. “Feels even better than I remember. Shit.”

You quiver as Howzer yanks his cock from you. The feeling of the loss is soon replaced by the feeling of his cum spurting onto your skin, the sensation making you moan. You must look like quite a sight, because he keeps humming and groaning quietly as he continues to fist his cock, milking every last drop onto your skin.

Howzer pulls a small cloth from one of his pouches and wipes you off with it, helping you stand upright on your shaky legs. He starts to reattach his kit to his armor as you pull your bottoms back on, doing your best to fix yourself up without a mirror.

“Now that we got that out of the way…” The both of you laugh before you continue, “Wanna actually share with me some useful information that I can relay to my boss?”

Howzer wipes his forehead – combs his fingers through his hair. “That I can do.”

It’s been a few weeks since you got to the base, and you’ve been welcomed by all as if you were one of them.

You’re all on the same side here.

You even have your own room, a place to retreat to when you need some privacy, and the men set up sleeping arrangements in there for you as well. You contact your office once a rotation to keep them up to date, though there hasn’t been much to tell as of yet. What you do know is that the clones are planning something big, a mission to help free more of their brothers, and you suppose you’re going to be here until that becomes more defined. Your security–well, they’re the Senator’s security–left after the first day because they were really only there to protect you, a member of the Senator’s staff, while traveling to Teth. After they did their job, they left, leaving you to do your job in peace.

Since your first day, you’ve gotten to know quite a few of the men who are stationed here, and you’ve been able to speak to the leadership as well as the ones who normally stay back while a certain few others come and go, whether it be with the leaders or on their own respective missions. Captain Howzer is one of the men who come and go, mostly staying at the side of Rex, the clone captain who was the original contact of your boss, the reason why you got into this job in the first place.

You stay inside of the Monastery, not being a huge fan of the climate outside the stone walls. What you do enjoy is stepping outside to see the sunset and watching how the two moons rise into the mauve sky, when the humidity isn’t at its peak. Otherwise, you’d never venture out into the tangly jungle, or dare to climb the rocky terrain by yourself.

When Captain Howzer is around, though – you end up wandering off to places you normally would never go on your own. He keeps you busy, even when you both have some downtime from your duties.

Your secret encounters started off with him simply sneaking into your room at a time when nobody would ask questions. Then, it became him guiding you to remote locations within the base grounds, like the leech vessel that remains safely docked halfway down the spire, or even the transport ship that’s been under maintenance. You’ve even found yourselves behind closed doors in the communications room in the dead of night, riding his lap in one of the chairs. It’s always been quick sex so as to not get caught, but there’s a connection there that has you both feeling its pull. He always finds you before leaving for a mission, and never fails to pay you a visit once he’s back and debriefed. Hells, Howzer even kisses you like he misses you, but it’s just physical, and has to stay that way.

Currently, Captain Howzer and several others are away – gone for the past few rotations. To be completely honest, without him as an obvious distraction, you’ve been able to really focus on your job.

You’ve just gotten off a call with your office and are finishing typing out notes into your datapad, when Fireball, one of the clones who was rescued from an Imperial prison transport nearly a year ago, calls out to you from the kitchen.

“Chow time!”

A man who has quickly become one of your favorites, Fireball has long been the elected sous-chef around here, gladly taking up the responsibility of feeding his brothers when Captain Gregor is away. He’s cooked for you every day since you got here, making the dishes just as spicy and flavorful as you like. Not only have the two of you bonded over the food, you’re sometimes the only two inside of the main area of the base while everyone is either keeping up with their own duties around base or off-world on a mission. In those moments, Fireball has been able to really dig deep into his past experiences with you, sharing some of the more painful details that he’d otherwise keep buried and repressed. It isn’t always gloomy conversation, though; he is quite funny and keeps you entertained with cheerful anecdotes from his days as a soldier of the Republic. You’ve truly started to look forward to eating and chatting with Fireball.

With a smile, you set down your datapad and head to the kitchen, where Fireball starts to shovel out stew from a pot into a bowl for you.

“Smells delicious,” you tell him appreciatively, taking the warm bowl from him. “Thank you, Fireball.”

“You’re very welcome.” He returns your smile, offering you a seat at the table. “I think I’m getting the hang of this cooking thing. Gregor taught me some of his recipes and I’ve enjoyed making them my own.” He sits down beside you at the table, watching you take your first bite with his brows raised. “This is my take on tiingilar – added my own modifications. What do you think?”

The warm colors of the vegetables and the spicy scent of the steam rising from the surface really add to the flavor of the bite, all of it coming together and melting right into your mouth.

“Wow – this is good. You really know how to win over a woman’s heart, Fireball.”

You could swear you see his cheeks darken with a blush, his eyes casting downward as he takes a few bites of his own. “It’s the Captain who’s won you over, from what I’ve been hearing,” he then adds with a chuckle. “Howzer’s been asking about you every time he makes contact. I should know – I mostly man comms around here.”

It’s your turn to blush, your cheeks heating with the comment. “I-It’s not like that,” you stammer awkwardly, failing to defend yourself. “I’ve been helping h– talking him through some things.” Fireball looks amused, still slurping on his stew and watching you trip over your words. “I– we– I mean not we, but– ”

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” he interrupts, waving you off. “I haven't spoken a word to anyone about your relationship with the Captain.”

You freeze.

“...Relationship?”

Fireball leans close, pitching his voice low. “I know about you two.” Your heart nearly drops, but he’s quick to offer you relief. “Howzer told me. He wanted to make sure that if anyone found out, I’d catch the chatter first on comms. I know it probably wouldn't be very beneficial for your office to find out.”

“Oh, well, thanks.” You wipe the embarrassment from your face. “How long have you known?” Taking a heaping bite, you purposefully avoid his eyes.

“Well, I've known ever since I sort of walked in on the two of you last week.”

You almost choke on the bite. “What?”

“In the comms room,” he quickly adds. “I’m normally up to check the channels every hour. I could hear the two of you behind the closed door, thankfully, before I could open it.”

“Shit. Sorry.”

“No need to apologize,” he chuckles. “I’m just glad Howzer’s in a better mood overall. Now I can figure that’s because of you.”

You blink at him. Something sits wrong in your gut, and it’s not the stew. The last thing you want is for the guys here to think of you as a piece of meat – someone who is only here to offer them relief in a physical way. If word got out about what you and Captain Howzer have been getting up to, not only would that tarnish the view of you in the clones’ eyes, but would cost you your job for sure.

“Hey, I was sent here to help all of you – to offer an ear for your experiences but while also taking down anything of note to help the cause for not just my people but yours as well.” You sit up straighter, setting the spoon down. “We are all on the same side here, but I’m not just– not just a booty call.”

“No, that’s not what I meant, I’m sorry,” Fireball amends, his hand coming to rest over your own. “I know why you’re here. You helped me on the day I was rescued, too.” He smiles. “I haven’t forgotten about what you did for me on my first day of freedom, how you showed compassion and empathy towards what I’d gone through with the Empire.”

You soften then, offering an apologetic smile. You remember Fireball, meeting him in the same garage in the lower levels of Coruscant only a few months prior to Howzer’s rescue. “I’m glad I was able to help.”

A silent minute goes by then, the two of you finishing up your stew. When you take the last bite, he collects your empty bowl, making the short walk to the kitchen and setting them in a pile to be cleaned later.

“You being present, eating with me says more than you know,” Fireball adds after taking his seat beside you once again. “Normally I’m by myself in here when the leadership is away, back and forth between keeping the others fed and monitoring communications.”

You nod along with his words, unable to hide your growing smile stemming from your heated cheeks. Fireball continues and you listen.

“It’s just nice to have somebody to talk to, somebody different.” He rubs at the back of his neck, flashing you a bashful grin. “It doesn't hurt that you’re beautiful, too. I understand why Howzer’s so taken with you.”

Something clicks then.

You’ve developed a crush on Fireball.

It makes sense – him being someone who’s always there, someone who you’re always looking forward to chatting with. Of course he’s attractive, but it’s not just the exterior you admire about him; you truly appreciate who he is as a person – the decisions he made leading up to his turn against the Empire. Sacrifice. Heart. He’s brave and resilient. Maybe you’re just being silly, but you think he feels some type of way about you as well.

You and Howzer aren’t a thing. It’s okay to feel something for somebody else.

“I have to confess something,” you say to him, locking eyes with his curious ones, rounding as you begin to speak. “The guys here are so lucky to have you on their side. You’re a real catch – and honestly, any woman would be lucky to have you, too.”

The mood suddenly changes – the air charged. You want him, you decide. You briefly reason with yourself that this would not go against what you were saying before, about how you don’t want to sully the guys’ opinions of you by offering yourself up like this. This – this is different. You feel a connection with Fireball, one that’s full of tension that’s ready to snap at any moment. It’s too strong to turn your head away from, and you’re well aware the man sitting beside you feels the very same.

“Oh yeah?” Fireball bites his lip – runs his fingers through his hair. His voice lowers, gruffer and thick. The sound of it goes through your core. “Any woman?”

You take a beat, your heart thumping in your chest. He’s gotten closer – subtly leaning toward you. His hand slowly comes up, fingers gently pinching your chin.

“Say it, beautiful.”

You know he can do more than just cook and make you laugh – a man who is competent with more than just incendiary weapons. He’s been holding something back for a long time, you just know it.

“I want you,” you confess, your voice barely above a whisper.

And you want him to let loose.

“Stand up.”

Even though his voice came out just as quiet as yours, his tone was firm and certain, nothing to defy. You’re quick to stand, and in seconds Fireball is standing as well, his hands grasping your upper arms. You blink at him, awaiting for what should come next. You sense that he’s going to be the one calling the shots here – guiding you exactly where he wants you to go. He may not be part of the leadership around here but he sure as hell is in charge at this very moment. His eyes are deep in thought, that much you can tell. You figure he’s trying to decide on where to start, and the anticipation is making you clench around nothing.

Finally, his eyes make a decision, his hands offering your arms a gentle squeeze.

“Turn around.”

You oblige, awaiting further guidance.

“I also have something to confess,” Fireball says, his lips just behind your ear. You hold your breath as his hands travel all over your body, his touches featherlight and teasing. “I’ve wanted you for a while. Ever since you got here, maybe even before, when I’d heard you’d be joining us for a while.”

“Oh yeah?”

He bends you over the table in one motion, and pulls your bottoms down to your knees in the next. You swallow thickly as his discarded gloves plop beside you on the tabletop. Breathlessly glancing over your shoulder, you catch sight of him slowly crouching down, his face just inches away from your bare skin.

“Yeah. And when I heard you and the Captain in the comms room last week, I had to find someplace quick to work one out. Couldn’t get the sounds you were making out of my head.”

Fireball caresses your skin, his fingers coming close to your folds. Knowing he’s that close to touching you where you want makes you clench, a sight that he appreciates.

“Has… Howzer ever tasted you before?”

The question alone makes you whimper.

“N–no. Not yet.”

He only hums at that.

“Fireball – touch me, please.”

He continues to tease you, fingers gently prodding through your folds. The soft squelching sound of your arousal heats your face. Growing impatient and desperate for something more, you wiggle your hips, hoping to hint at him to stop teasing and get to it.

“You said to touch you, beautiful, and I am touching you. If you’re wanting something else, I need to hear you ask nicely.”

You could almost roll your eyes at that, but you’re far too worked up to be a brat. You know from experience that certain behaviors, though they can be fun, won’t get you very far.

“Please put your mouth on me. I want to feel your mouth on me, please.”

His response to you is a throaty chuckle, soon followed by exactly what you asked for. When he finally puts his mouth on you, you nearly cry out in relief.

He starts slow – still teasing while giving you the bare minimum. His lips plant little kisses to the backs of your thighs and all over your folds, his hands holding your hips steady. You’re so worked up that even the small amount he’s granting you is almost enough, but knowing what’s still to come, your body aches for more.

“Fireball, please, more.”

“I appreciate the manners.” You feel him chuckle again behind you, the vibrations even more teasing. Finally, you feel his tongue poke out between his lips, prodding through your folds.

You slam your hand against the tabletop. “Oh, fuck.”

He hums in satisfaction, quickly losing himself in your taste. Fireball practically latches his mouth to your pussy, his tongue vigorously working its way through and between your folds. The suction of your clit caught in his lips nearly ends you right then and there, but sensing that you’re incredibly close, he removes his mouth from you and instead stands. Disappointed, you turn your head to face him, catching sight of him wiping his mouth and removing the guard on his armor.

“I need to know what you feel like wrapped around me, beautiful.”

Seemingly awaiting your approval, Fireball runs his fingers through his hair, holding his hardened cock in his other hand. You gulp at the size of him, flushed and leaking. You haven't even touched him and he looks like he’s about to bust, his own arousal coming from just the taste of you.

“Fuck me, then.”

He hums.

You feel the head of his cock slide through the mess he made between your legs, and as he pushes himself in the slightest, you can’t help the shudder that rips through your body. He’s big, and even though you’re more than wet enough to take him, you’re clenching too much in anticipation.

He laughs at that – soft and sweet yet full of cockiness.

“Easy, darling. Barely even inside of you yet.” Fireball groans, the sound of it sending even more heat to your core. “Take a deep breath for me.”

You do, and he feeds his cock into you in that very breath.

“I won’t last very long,” he tells you once his armored hips are flush with your rear. “You feel too incredible.”

He starts to thrust then, slowly at first and even at the current pace you’re losing your mind. He’s so deep inside of you that you can feel him in your stomach. You don’t realize just how silent you’ve been through it all–too focused on holding your breath and keeping the noise to a minimum–until Fireball comments on it, briefly pausing and checking in to make sure you’re okay.

“‘M fine,” you assure him. Your hand finds his own from where it's grabbing your hip – extra reassurance. “Faster. Go faster. Please.”

You’re guided into a standing position, your back meeting the cool, hard armor covering his body. Fireball’s hand wraps around your throat, not squeezing with too much pressure but it's very much there. His other hand finds its way between your legs, rubbing at your clit to match his increasing speed. It isn’t long until you’re crying out in ecstasy into the palm of your head, tears brimming in your eyes at the intensity of it all. When you climax, Fireball feels it for sure, his own cresting at breakneck speed.

“Where do you want me,” he breathily gasps into your ear, still rubbing your clit into overstimulation. You don’t have it in you to care though, legs wavering from your ongoing climax.

“Inside,” you whimper. “I have the implant.”

“Fuck, okay.”

Fireball cums inside of you – and the feeling is indescribable.

Never before have you been with a partner who felt like this during an orgasm. He makes the most sinful of noises as his cock swells deep inside of you, his body shaking against yours. He pants into your ear while your entire cunt heats with his amount of release, enough of it to seep out even with his cock still fully inside of you, feeling it trickle down your thighs.

Fireball bends you down against the table once again when he pulls out, a gush of warmth following. Crouched down to watch his handiwork, he swipes his fingers through some of the mess along your inner thighs, bringing it back to where it belongs.

“Messy girl. Took me so well.” He stands, guiding you back to your feet, “Fuck, you’re perfect.”

“Anybody could have walked in on us,” you laugh breathlessly, that very realization making you quick in redressing, not caring about the mess still dribbling down your thighs and now soaking your underwear.

Tucking himself back into his undersuit and reattaching his guard piece, Fireball blinks dreamily at you. You’re pulled in by the look in his eyes, full of satisfaction and adoration. Your lips meet then, a passionate kiss that punctuates the moment perfectly.

“I should get to the comms,” he tells you almost apologetically. You nod in understanding, meeting his lips for another kiss. “See you around?”

“Of course,” you reply. “Looking forward to our next meal and conversation.”

The unspoken third activity hangs in the air, Fireball grinning knowingly at the implication.

It wasn’t even an hour later when some of the others came back to base after being away for a few rotations. You heard the team return, conversations loud enough to sound as if they were occurring just outside your room. Something about running into another shadow – those assassins you’ve been briefed on. Figuring this is a conversation you should be apart of, you gather your datapad and go to head out the door.

Right as you’re opening the door, Howzer is there.

“Welcome back,” you tell him with a hint of surprise in your voice, not at all expecting him to be right there. “I was just coming out to see what was going on.”

“We’ll debrief you later. Rex and Gregor have other business to attend to at the moment.”

You set down your datapad. “Oh, okay. Well, if you’re hungry, there’s a huge pot of tiingilar on the stove that was made about an hour ago. Should still be pretty warm–”

Howzer interrupts you when his lips passionately meet yours.

“There’s only one thing I’m hungry for,” he mumbles against your lips, quickly shutting the door behind him. “And she’s standing right here in front of me.”

You giggle at that, once again being swept off your feet when Howzer’s lips reconnect with yours. It happens so fast – his hands roaming your body. Too lost in the feeling of his mouth on yours and his tongue tasting your lips you don’t realize one of his hands has already lost a glove and found its way into your pants until you jolt from the sensation. Your reaction makes Howzer pause, a curious brow raised.

You never cleaned yourself up from earlier. A request to make contact with your office had come in immediately following what took place in the kitchen, and you were so consumed with work that you completely forgot to take care of yourself.

And Howzer noticed.

“What’s the matter? A little sensitive down there, baby?”

You only manage a nod, bashfully smiling through it against his lips. Howzer continues, only now his fingers move your soaked panties to the side. He pauses again, this time pulling his face from yours.

“Oh?” He hums playfully, narrowing his eyes yet still keeping his cocky smirk. “You're a mess.”

His fingers slip inside you with ease, and his eyes widen. You choke on a gasp when his fingers pull from you, his hand raising up between your faces for you both to see. Coated on his digits is the creamy film of a mixture of releases, and some of it still dripping from your pussy from what happened between you and Fireball.

“Now who did this?”

Howzer once again lowers his hand and slips his fingers inside of you, pulling them out only to swipe at your sensitive clit. The motions make your body jolt again, and he takes notice, clicking his tongue disapprovingly.

“Here I was thinking you took care of yourself because you’re just so needy.” He shakes his head, his tongue coming to wet his lips. “Now I see I’m not the only one you’re fucking around here.”

Howzer wipes his hand onto his glove, his eyes never leaving yours. Guilt and shame immediately flood your entire body – but you’re unsure why. You and Howzer aren’t a thing – nothing official. So why does he sound so–not angry, not upset–disappointed?

He tilts his head, a cocky look once again appearing on his face as he watches you.

“Hey, it's okay,” he tells you genuinely, reaching for your arms and pulling you towards him. He guides you toward a wall, your back firmly pressed against it. “I don't mind sharing. Why don't you tell me who it was, baby? Tell me who beat me into cumming in this perfect pussy while I was away.”

Crouching down, Howzer guides your bottoms off, pulling them from your feet and tossing it all to the side. He watches how you squirm under his gaze, his eyes taking note of every detail from the encounter you had.

“Couldn't have been Gregor,” he comments absently, swiping his fingers through your mess. He plants a kiss to an unsullied part of your inner thigh. “Couldn't have been Rex, either.”

The very names of both captains being used in this context makes you shiver, the thought of either of them touching you in such a way heating you up inside. They’re both incredibly competent – strong – skilled. You’re sure they’d completely and utterly ruin you for anybody else.

Howzer chuckles at your reaction and stands up, his hand still toying with you. “It wasn't them but I can tell you wouldn't mind that, hm? Such a filthy, needy girl. You'd take all of us at one time if that were possible, wouldn't you?”

The thought truly never crossed your mind until now – something to revisit later. You’re getting yourself into trouble – the best kind. You’re afraid of getting addicted to the feeling of these men touching you, first Howzer and then Fireball. They may be clones, but from what you can tell so far, they do things in their own, unique ways. You’d be lying if you said that you weren’t at all curious about how the others would handle you – if they’d take you roughly, tenderly – if they’d use their mouth on you or speak filth into your ear.

Your own fantasies scare you – threatening to make you lose sight of who you are and why you’re here. The most debauched of images flash into your mind – a scene of multiple men of this base taking turns using you in any way they desire.

Fingers slowly thrusting into you as he awaits your response, you gasp out a shaky “Yes”, making Howzer bite his lip.

He peers at you with darkened eyes. “We can discuss that later.”

But he's not finished questioning you yet.

“Was it Greer? Samson?” Howzer’s hand quickens, fingers plummeting harder into you. He curls them, too – massages the spot that makes your brain fuzzy. Lips brushing against your jaw, he continues to rattle off a few more familiar names, but you shake your head at each of them.

“Nemec?”

No.

“Fireball?”

When you finally hear his name, you can't help but gasp. Howzer catches on, humming thickly at your wordless confession.

“Ah, I see. I'm sure he was good to you, baby, so why are you this needy and wanting more?”

Howzer removes his hand then, instead heading over toward the door, leaving you pantsless and unfulfilled.

“Howzer, please.”

Hand reaching for the door controls, he turns his head over his shoulder. “Why don't I call Fireball in here so he can properly take care of you, hm? Seems you were left unsatisfied.”

When you don't respond right away, Howzer approaches you, his face serious and concerned. He takes your hand. “If this is too much, please let me know. It's all just talk if that's what you're comfortable with. We don't need to take it further.”

“I appreciate your caution. I really do – but I'm fine with it, Howzer.”

“You're sure?”

“I– I like that idea,” you admit quietly.

Howzer raises an intrigued brow.

You feed into it then, reiterating the foundation of all this talk.

“I let Fireball cum inside of me.”

“I know, baby. Want to tell me what else he did?”

“He ate me out from behind and fucked me against the kitchen table.”

Howzer’s eyes widen at your confession but narrow just as quickly, seemingly disapproving of the carelessness you displayed. Every encounter you had with Howzer so far has been off the beaten path, definitely not in a common area in the middle of the day no less.

He shakes his head.

“Anybody could have walked in on you two.”

It was risky – but exciting.

You bite your lip at the memory.

“I know.”

“When was this?”

“About an hour ago.”

Letting out a deep sigh, Howzer puts his hands on his hips, tilting his head to the side in thought. He watches you intently with his lips twisted. “Hm. Clean yourself up, then take off your clothes and get on the bed. I'll be back soon, okay?”

You nod, Howzer kissing you before throwing out one last command: “And don’t touch yourself.”

Body shaking and your heart pounding with anticipation, you quickly clean yourself up with a damp rag and shed the rest of your clothing before getting into your bed, just as you were instructed. Implications of Howzer’s final comments to you has you spiraling, different scenarios coming to the forefront of your mind. He’s going to get Fireball, you know it. He’s going to bring him right here to you, and the two of them will take turns with you – or, maybe, they’ll use you at the same time.

Your pussy flutters at that idea.

You try your hardest to present yourself in the best way for their return, propping yourself up against your pillows and wrapping the blanket around parts of you that they would have to remove themselves to expose you. It’s a lengthy twenty or so minutes until Howzer returns, but just as you thought, Fireball’s right at his side.

“Hello, boys,” you say in the sweetest voice you can muster, despite the small amount of disappointment for the wait. Their eyes flash the very same dark shade of desire, pooling deep in those soft brown eyes they share.

“Sorry for keeping you waiting, darling. I made sure no one would be around. Had to make up an excuse to borrow Fireball for the evening.”

“You didn’t touch yourself while you were waiting, did you, beautiful?”

Your eyes flicker to Fireball, shaking your head no.

“Good girl. Following orders so well already.”

Howzer agrees and starts to undo his holders and the rest of his armor, Fireball wordlessly following the other in preparation. Neither of them take their eyes off of you for too long, staring at you as if they mean to devour you completely.

And you think they just might.

Dressed only in their undersuits now, Howzer doesn’t break eye contact with you as he addresses the other, gesturing to you with a jolt of his chin.

“Fireball, she told me what you did out in the kitchen, where anybody could have walked right in,” he begins, that same firm, disapproving tone present in his voice as it was with you. “Now, I want you to show me exactly what you did to make our girl so damn messy.”

Our girl.

You could get used to this.

“Of course.” Fireball grins. “I’d be happy to.”

You bite your lip at Fireball as he approaches, but you glance quickly to Howzer, who has decided to sit this one out in the chair against the wall.

His eyes don’t leave you, though. He’s going to watch.

“A proper bed,” Fireball comments, caressing your cheek in the palm of his hand. He rips the blanket from your body and leans toward your ear, lowering his voice so only you can hear. “I can’t wait to break you apart. I’m going to ruin you, beautiful.”

Your heart skips a beat, then Howzer speaks up in the background almost knowingly. “We all know the color system, correct?”

Not looking towards the man in the chair, you nod, Fireball nodding along with you.

“Good.”

With that, Howzer leans back, legs spread. You can already see the outline of his cock straining in his skin-tight pants.

He wants a show, and you’re going to give him one.

That is, if Fireball doesn’t destroy you first.

“I can’t believe how messy you were,” Fireball comments in disbelief as his hand slips between your legs. “Kept me inside of you that whole time, even let Howzer finger you like that.” He continues stroking you, paying extra attention to your clit. “Spread your legs this way,” he directs, angling your body so you’re exposed to Howzer. Fireball teases you in the same fashion as he did just a little while earlier, planting kisses all over your thighs and folds until you’re begging him for more. Howzer, meanwhile, has started to palm himself over his clothes, watching with his lips parted.

The extra pair of eyes on you turns you on even more.

“Fireball, use your tongue like you did before.”

He smacks his lips, squeezing your thigh in warning. “Now, now, where are the manners you were using so politely before?”

You’re not in charge here. You never were.

“...Please.”

Satisfied, Fireball grins. “Good girl.”

He attacks your pussy with his tongue, only this time, he’s sloppier. Maybe it’s the change of angle, or maybe it’s the audience, but he’s using his tongue in a way that has your head spinning and hips bucking. Fireball seems to be spurred on by this, doubling his efforts and even using an arm to keep you pressed into the bed. He switches to suck vigorously at your clit before lapping at you and it’s already far too much. Your body is desperate for release.

“I’m– I'm going to cum. Please let me cum. Please.”

He pulls his mouth from you, his lips smacking against your wet folds from a sloppy kiss. Wiping his mouth, he flashes you a devilish grin.

“Not yet. You’re going to cum on my cock, just like before.”

Defeated, you flop your head back onto the bed, your climax receding. You know that the disappointment won’t last for long, though.

Fireball stands, kicking his bottoms all the way off and peeling his shirt off over his head. You’re granted a perfect view of his entire body, the muscles and hair and soft patches making your head spin. You even discover he has a tattoo – a rather large piece that starts from his hip and travels up his side, the shape of flames twisting around to his pectoral.

You go to adjust, to change position, but Fireball stops you. “No, no. You lay just like that,” he tells you, guiding you back to where you were. “Hold your knees up for me. Good girl – just like that.”

Still laying on your back, both men have a perfect view of your pussy, clenching with need before their eyes.

Fireball leans down to your ear again, his cock hot and dragging heavy against your stomach. He’s so incredibly warm. “We’re going to give him a show. When I cum, I’m going to fill you, and you’re going to take it all like the good girl you are.”

You gasp at his filthy words of promise, but Fireball isn’t pleased with your lack of verbal response. He pinches your cheeks between his fingers, not hard, but definitely firm enough to get your attention. “You tell me if I’m going too rough,” he asks you sincerely. “I’m having fun with you, but stop me if it’s going over the line.” You nod weakly, desperate to feel him between your legs once again. He shakes his head. “Sweetheart, I need you to say it.”

“I’ll let you know,” you promise. “I’m green, Fireball.”

“Good.”

With that, he stands back up at the edge of the bed, scooping his hands under your rear and dragging you up above the edge. Your hands grab at your knees as instructed.

“Deep breath,” he commands, turning his head over his shoulder at Howzer, almost as if he’s giving him a pointer – a jab about his size.

Your lower half hovering over the bed, you take that deep breath, already knowing what’s to come. Fireball impales you on his cock, sinking even deeper than before without the armor as a hindrance. Every part of his hips and groin make contact with your skin this time, including the maintained curls at the base of his cock. He holds there for a few moments, taking deep breaths, almost as if he’s composing himself.

You once again glance at Howzer, his cock outside of his waistband now and being fisted by his hand.

You could gush from the sight alone.

“I’m green,” you remind Fireball.

Sweat already starts to bead at his hairline, strands of hair falling out of place. He looks wrecked already and he hasn’t even begun moving yet.

“You feel incredible like this,” he sighs in admiration. “I should just have you sit on my cock while I’m manning comms. Keep it warm for hours until you’re shaking.”

“Fuck, Fireball–”

“Yeah, would you like that, beautiful? To be my pretty little cockwarmer?”

“For fucks sake, enough,” Howzer growls out from behind him. “Just fuck her already, or step aside.”

You almost laugh at how Howzer’s impatience is somehow shorter than your own, but Fireball isn’t having it. He goes from zero to ten in seconds, pulling his cock all the way out before slamming back in. Your entire body jolts from each thrust, breaths being punched out of your lungs almost uncomfortably. The feeling of his cock knocking into the back wall of your cunt is all you can focus on, and as Fireball becomes more intense, he stalks talking.

“Tell him, beautiful,” he begins, his skin slick with sweat and lips parted. “Tell him who the first one was to cum inside this pussy. Tell him who claimed you there first.”

You hear Howzer groan from behind him, and it spurs you on. You did want to give him a show, after all.

“You did, Fireball,” you choke out. “You did.”

“Damn right,” he continues, more hair falling out of place. “And I’m going to do it again, but you’re going to cum with me. You cum when I say and only when I say. Understood?”

“...Yes, sir.”

Your ranking comment seems to be one that does Howzer in, because you can hear the telltale sounds of the Captain cumming into his own hand. Fireball though, he takes your comment and runs with it, twisting his face into determination. The muscles of his abdomen flex violently as his thrusts change into quick jabs. He’s utterly disheveled, but he’s not done with you yet.

“I can feel how close you are. You’re so fucking tight around my cock.”

You nod absently, too far gone to speak. There’s so much pressure built up inside of you that you feel you’ll burst at any moment; and that moment comes when Fireball’s fingers find your clit, rubbing at it in quick motions.

“Cum. Now.”

You’re thankful to hear the words, because you fear you were about to anyway. You feel yourself gush around his cock, along with that familiar feeling of heat coming from his own release being pushed deep inside of you. You’re drunk on it – utterly lost in euphoria. Out of your body. The only thing keeping you tethered to reality is how Fireball caresses your cheeks, so incredibly tender compared to how he just handled you.

“You okay, beautiful?”

His eyes look wide with concern, full of fear that he crossed a line. You reassure him with the sincerest smile you can manage at the moment, your head still dizzy with endorphins.

You then see Howzer appear beside Fireball, his face reading the same expression.

You reach up to take Howzer’s hand. “You wanted Fireball to make a mess of me again,” you say quietly, still coming back to your body. “Look.”

Both men look at where you’re gesturing, their eyes blown wide and lips parting with a groan. You clench and relax your muscles, pearls of white seeping out from your swollen pussy and dripping onto the floor. You giggle tiredly at their shared reactions.

“I know you need a break, baby,” Howzer says, running his hand along your thigh. “But I want you so bad right now.”

“Then have me,” you offer. “I promise I’m green, just a little tired is all.”

Fireball cleans himself off and starts to redress. “I’m going to get some water.” He hands Howzer a different rag and places a kiss on your forehead. “I’ll be back shortly.”

Howzer lifts you and lays you down the other way, your head now supported by pillows. He strips off his undersuit and takes his place beside you, one hand caressing different parts of your body while the other carefully runs the rag between your legs.

“You’re breathtaking,” he tells you. “And you looked so good getting fucked like that.”

You smile at him, holding his chin in your hand, running your thumb along the scar. “I can’t believe you just watched,” you tease. “I almost expected you to push Fireball out of the way, especially after how impatient you got.”

He laughs at that. “I’ll still have you, baby. I’m not worried.”

“Have me now, Howzer.”

“You sure?”

“Please. I want you.”

“Okay, pretty girl. I’ll be gentle.”

Howzer climbs on top of you, holding your face in his hand as he swipes his cock through your folds. You wince at the sensation, far too oversensitive for any type of teasing. Even though he just came into his hand not long before you got yours, he’s already hard again, and easily slips inside of you. Both of you share a soft moan, Howzer’s eyes fluttering shut at the feel of you wrapped around him.

Your leg bent and held against his hip, he slowly starts to thrust, his heated chest pressed against yours.

“I missed this,” he admits. “I thought about you a lot while I was away.”

“Fireball told me that you were asking about me every time you made contact.” You giggle when Howzer looks away in embarrassment, but your hand finds his scarred cheek, delicately redirecting his eyes to yours. “It was sweet.”

Howzer’s lips meet yours, his hips resuming that same, slow pace. It’s relaxed yet he’s still hitting so deep, a balming sensation that sends butterflies through your stomach.

A knock at your door makes you both pause briefly, but you soon recognize it as Fireball returning with water, and invite him in.

“Leave it on the table,” you direct Fireball. “And come over here.”

Howzer gives you a curious look, though not letting it phase his movements. Fireball obeys and is at your side in an instant. You take your hand from Howzer’s shoulder and instead reach for the waistband of Fireball’s undersuit. His brow raises, and this time, Howzer halts.

“I want to suck your cock while Howzer fucks me.”

Both men once again widen their eyes.

“This is what I want,” you offer before either of them can object or make an argument for your sake. “Howzer, it’s okay, you can go a little harder. I know you want to.”

Howzer smirks at you and nods, adjusting himself to kneel upright so he can give you what both of you need. Fireball can’t help but reach for your breasts, running his hands all over your chest. You guide his cock out from his undersuit and he steps closer, resting a knee on the bed to get a good angle.

“Howzer, I want you to cum inside of me. Fireball, I want you to cum on my tits.”

“Oh, fuck,” you hear one of them groan.

Looking up at Fireball with pleading eyes, you open your mouth and extend your tongue. His jaw practically drops at your gesture, taking that as the goahead to feed his cock into your mouth. You taste the tang of release still clinging to his skin and you quickly start to crave it, your mouth watering for more.

Howzer resumes his own movements, his hands clinging to your hips like a vice. They both use you, one cock nudging the back of your throat while another punches into your gut. Howzer’s normally perfectly styled hair quickly becomes mussed from exertion, those combed strands collapsing down his forehead.

Fireball thrusts into your mouth over and over again, drool starting to dribble down your cheek and chin. He keeps one hand occupied with squeezing your breasts while the other finds a home wrapped around your throat, just as it was earlier. That same tingly sensation floods your senses again from even the faintest of pressure offered, sending sparks to your core.

“She’s so close,” Howzer tells the other, as if you aren’t there.

Fireball smirks at that, squeezing your throat with just a little extra pressure.

“Fuck, do that again,” Howzer groans. “She liked that.”

Fireball repeats the motion, squeezing then releasing, and each time you clench with the return of pressure. It’s so much and just when you thought you couldn’t possibly have another one in you, your third orgasm of the evening hangs right there, though this one doesn't feel as disastrous. You start to welcome it but hold back, awaiting permission.

“It’s okay, beautiful,” Fireball coos. “Cum for us.”

Howzer chimes in, slowing his thrusts and angling his hips upward to hit that spot he knows will send you over the edge. “C’mon, baby. You can cum.”

When it arrives, it washes over you like a cool, replenishing rain, different from the others that were burning hot and unforgiving. You feel at ease and brand new. You feel safe with these men, knowing they’d do anything to take care of you. As you start to come down from your relaxed high, the pair dote on you with praise and gentle touches, then switch their focus to finishing themselves. You help them get there anyway you can, adding in extra clenches for Howzer and tongue movements for Fireball.

It isn’t much longer after that when Fireball pulls out of your mouth and pumps himself at the head, squeezing as his cock spurts his cum onto your chest. Howzer starts to crumble at the sight of the white ropes painting your breasts and drool coating your chin, and shortly after that, he’s burying himself as deep inside you as he can, pelvis flush with yours, and shakes and groans with his own release.

Both of them looked wrecked yet so satisfied. They also share the same admiration in their eyes as they get you cleaned up and hydrated.

Fireball sits at the edge of the bed, offering you and Howzer the blanket to cover up.

“Can I ask you both a personal question?” You and Howzer glance at each other, nodding in unison to Fireball before he continues. “What started…” he gestures with his hands to the two of you lying beside one another in bed, “...This?”

“We actually met several months ago,” you start to explain.

“And hooked up that same day,” Howzer adds with a grin. “Guess we sort of picked up where we left off.”

You laugh. “Captain Impatient here couldn't wait to get me alone on my first day here.”

Howzer shakes his head at your nickname, and Fireball only nods along as he listens to the two of you go back and forth.

“I don’t want to get in the middle of anything,” Fireball finally chimes in. “You two have something here – and I don’t want to ruin that.”

You make eye contact with Howzer, both of you thinking the exact same thing.

“You’re not ruining anything,” you assure him. “What Howzer and I have–” you look at Howzer again, to ensure you’re both on the same page, “--It won’t go beyond this right here.”

Fireball turns instead to his captain, wanting to hear what he has to say.

Howzer considers for a moment, tenderly grabbing your chin before responding. “I already told our girl here that I don’t mind sharing.” He pauses again. “That is– if you don’t mind sharing, Fireball.”

Fireball grins. “I definitely don’t mind. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t getting in the way of anything.”

Simultaneously, they both make eye contact with you. Howzer’s fingers delicately run across your cheek. “Are you okay with it, darling?”

You ponder their offer for a moment, thinking about everything it could cost you. You’re here for work, not for pleasure. You’re way out in Wild Space because you were entrusted with this job. Yes, you would lose this job if word got around that you’re sleeping with the clones. Yes, you’d lose the trust of many, and perhaps lose the faith of your people, who are counting on your office to fight against the Empire in a diplomatic way.

But you look at these two men, one laying next you, the other sitting at your bedside. Both of them would protect you without a second thought. Both of them have already shown how much they care about you. Both of them still allow you to do your job, mutually benefitting from it. They take your mind off everything that’s going on – the oppression of your people, the tragic experiences of recently rescued clones, the disheartening news when a mission fails.

And when the need arises, both of them can make you feel things unlike anything you’d ever felt before. It started with Captain Howzer – and you’re not at all about to turn away Fireball. You have strong connections with both of them, and you’re not willing to give up the physical aspects of those relationships.

Sitting up, you grab their hands, holding them in your own. You keep a serious expression on your face, wanting to display that yes, you’ve given this a lot of thought, even though you already knew your answer. You want to show them that you’re taking this seriously, and that their caution and concern are dually warranted.

That serious expression of yours morphs into eagerness, a smile forcing its way across your lips.

“As long as I can do my job without too many distractions, and as long as my office doesn’t find out – I’m okay with it.”

#djarrex writes #captain howzer x reader #clone trooper fireball x reader #howzer x reader #fireball x reader #howzer x reader x fireball #the bad batch #tbb #clone thirsting

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intricatechaosofyou · 1 month

Text

To Keep Memories Alive

Pairing: Echo x f!reader

Fandom: The Bad Batch; Star Wars

Summary: The Republic might be gone, but that doesn’t mean the war is over, especially not for the clones. You and Echo manage to find solace in each other. And memories would always remain. But sometimes you just need someone to listen to you.

Based off the song “Ghosts That We Knew” by Mumford & Sons

Lyrics: “And the ghosts that we knew will flicker from view // And we’ll have a long life”

Warnings: angsty, talk of death and loss, hopefully a touching ending!

Author’s note: Happy @cloneficgiftexchange day!! As usual, @ghostofskywalker hosts an amazing event and I’m so grateful to participate!This was such a fun prompt to work with! I saw the characters and the song and knew exactly who I had to write for! Thanks to @akaanade for such a fun idea, and I hope you like what I have for you babe! Happy summer to all the clone lovers <3

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No one exactly knew who decided to create the clones. One day, Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi ventured to a planet called Kamino, and the next, the clone army served the Republic.

They fought side by side with their Jedi generals, helping to bring about the end of the Separatist army and restore peace to the galaxy.

Until it all changed.

Suddenly, the Jedi were deemed traitors of the Republic and the clones that once fought with them now had orders to eliminate them.

You remember that day. The smoke from the Temple, the panic in the senate, the day the Republic turned into the Galactic Empire.

And now the Empire was trying to phase out clones, the clones who fought so valiantly in the name of the Republic, and now in the name of the Empire.

As an aide for the Pantoran Senator Chuchi, you worked with her side by side to fight for the rights of the clones.

That’s how you ended up in ties with the unofficial clone rebellion.

There were familiar faces, like Captain Rex and Captain Howzer, distinguished clones you had met before during assignments with Senator Chuchi.

But among the group of identical faces, there were some you knew you hadn’t met before like Fireball and Gregor.

And Echo.

The ex-ARC trooper was unlike any other clone you had met. His bravery and intelligence were unlike anything you had ever seen, not even in a clone trooper.

Between missions, when you had downtime and weren’t required by the Senator. You’d find yourself seeking him out, hoping to hear another story, to hear about his brothers that he held in such high esteem.

You’d hear tales about his days stationed at the Richi Outpost with the Domino Squad, his missions alongside the 501st as an ARC-trooper, and then there were stories about his most recent adventures alongside Clone Force 99, more commonly called the Bad Batch. His stories about the special troopers and the young girl, Omega, who joined them never failed to make you smile.

While you loved all of his stories, the ones about his brother named Fives were always your favorite. You could watch the wistful look in his eyes grow as he recounted their adventures and heroics—and of course, their (mostly Fives’) accidents.

“And when Rex walked in, Fives stood at attention hoping Rex wouldn’t notice the fact he had gotten his bucket stuck on his foot.”

Your laughter echoed through the night air as you listened to the tale from Echo’s ARC-trooper days.

“What did you do?” You managed to get out between your giggles.

Echo chuckled and shook his head. “When Rex asked what Fives had done, I looked him dead in the eyes and asked ‘who’s Fives?’”

“You didn’t!” You gasped, grabbing onto his shoulder in an attempt to keep yourself steady as another bout of laughter came on.

The clone nodded, chuckling quietly to himself at your reaction. Recounting stories of his fallen brothers was often painful. Even the mere thought of them was enough to put him in a stupor for the rest of the day.

But somehow you made his recollections a little lighter. The way you listened so intently, the way you asked questions and got involved in the conversation, the way you would rest your hand on his knee when you noticed his words start to stall and voice started to waver.

As you finally recovered from your fit of laughter, you turned your head to look at Echo only to find him already looking at you with a soft smile.

A warmth bloomed in your stomach at his expression and you found yourself matching his smile. There was something about the way he looked at you that made you feel giddy despite yourself.

“What?” You asked.

Echo’s answer was immediate. “Thank you for listening.”

Although it was a simple thanks, there was a deeper meaning behind his words.

It wasn’t just a thank you for listening, it was a thank you for being there with him, a thank you for your kind smile, a thank you for reminding him that there was still good in the galaxy after everything he had lost. You gave him hope that one day he’d see the light again.

And maybe he’d express all of that to one day. But for now, his simple thank you would have to do.

You grinned at him. “Anytime, Echo. I love your stories.”

You laid your hand on his shoulder, leaning towards him and planting a kiss on his cheek.

A small part of you relished the way he flushed at the action.

“They’re hard to tell sometimes,” he admits, glancing up at the stars above your heads.

You nodded, keeping your hand on his shoulder as you noticed his somber tone.

“But that’s why it’s good to tell them. Your brothers live on in your stories, they’re not just memories anymore.”

You let your hand slide down his shoulder until it reached his own good hand. You tangled your fingers with his, giving his palm a gentle squeeze.

He turned his head to you, gently pressing your foreheads together. He had told you about this gesture before. It was a Keldabe kiss, a tradition of the Mandalorians. And in moments like these, it felt more intimate than a normal kiss.

Maybe one day the fighting would stop and things would settle down once the peace returned. And as Echo sat with you in a moment of serenity, he was sure of it: the ghosts that he knew would flicker from view, and the two of you would have a long life.

#SFE24 #star wars #star wars tbb #star wars the bad batch #star wars the clone wars #tbb starwars #the bad batch star wars #tbb echo x reader #echo the bad batch #tbb echo #arc trooper echo #echo x reader #echo x you #echo x fem!reader

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winniethewife · 3 months

Text

Missing pieces find me (Captain Howzer x F!Reader)

Gif by @nobie

for Operation #MoreHowzerFics

Words: 791

Howzer hadn’t slept well in a long time. He wasn’t sure he’d ever gotten a full nights rest since the war ended. In the past it hadn’t seemed to bother him, but now working in the Clone underground. He wondered, if maybe something wasn’t quite right with that. He realized at some point he couldn’t focus on the Data pad in front of him, His vison was hazy and he felt off. He blinks a few times, looks up and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Howzer? You alright there?” Rex raised an eyebrow at him from across the room.

“I…I think so…it’s just a headache.” Howzer tried to brush it off. Rex wasn’t at all convinced. He walks over to him and takes the Data pad from his

“Vod… you need some rest…go.” Howzer can tell by the tone of Rex that he isn’t asking, he’s telling. Howzer sighed dramatically before standing up.

“Whatever you say captain.” Howzer replied with an abundance of sass in his voice. Rex rolled his eyes and waved him off. Howzer made his way to the makeshift Barracks. He passed by the medbay on his way and he stopped for a minute. His immediate reaction is to search the room for her. The medic who had caught his eye the moment they had met the first time. They had formed a close friendship that developed into more but they hadn’t really put a definition on it. He found her talking to one of the other medics over a box of supplies. He waited patiently to be noticed, not wanting to take her attention from the task at hand. He wasn’t waiting long before she noticed him and made her way over to him. She gave him a kind smile.

“Captain, can I help you with something?” She asked.

“Uh, yeah I’ve been…feeling kinda off…Rex sent me off to get some rest…” He rubs the back of his neck as he looked at her. It was hard to stay professional with her.

“and why aren’t you?” she asked with a cheeky smile knowing full well why he stopped by.

“I…I wanted to see you.” He admitted shyly. She smiled knowingly.

“I could probably get away for a short time, if you need some company…” She looked over her shoulder. “I think the others can make it on their own for an hour or so.”

“I’ll take whatever I can get.” Howzer said with a laugh. They both walked to the barracks, fingers grazing each other occasionally as they walked side by side. Howzer felt, increasingly nervous, and incredibly inadequate. Once they finally arrived in the barracks, Howzer started to take off his armor, leaving him in just his blacks. As he does this she sits down on his bunk and watched with a smile on her face. He turns to look at her, his face slightly flushed as he noticed her watching.

“Like what you see?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Yes…But that’s not why we’re here.” She laughs. She pats the bunk beside her and he gives a shrug and a chuckle as he lays in the bunk. She lays next to him, running her fingers gently though his hair, her touch was comforting. But as much as he tried to sleep, he couldn’t. It was nearly painful. His face contorted with pain, and she gently traced her fingers over his face. “Talk to me Howzer. What’s going on?”

“I can’t sleep, and it hurts…I don’t know…” He hesitated, He definitely wasn’t used to talk about his problems. But she made him feel safe, like he could tell her anything. “I…I feel like I’m missing pieces, of myself. Of normalcy. I don’t know what I’m doing, if I’m doing anything. I’m trying to figure out what my purpose is in all this.” He says quietly. Her gaze softened, and she gently holds his face in her hands.

“It’s okay to feel like that, you have spent your whole life, with one purpose, to fight a war. The war is over, and there’s a learning process. You are, missing pieces, every one of you. You’re finding a way to feel whole again without the republic, without so many of your brothers. It will take time.” She says these things softly and lovingly as she runs her thumbs across his cheeks and gazes into his eyes. “But I’ll be here, for every step. Alright?”

“I…thank you.” Howzer sighs. Wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her in close, burying his face in the crook of her neck. He felt…for just a moment, that he was whole, she made him feel that way. And finally, for the first time in a long time. He fell asleep.

Masterlist

Taglist: @masterjedilenawrites @silvernight-m @queerponcho @boredzillenial

#MoreHowzerFics #star wars #captain howzer #tbb howzer #clone trooper howzer #bad batch howzer #howzer x reader #clones #clone wars #the bad batch #x reader #spotify #star wars fanart #star wars fanfiction #star wars fic #Spotify

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fandom-friday · 6 months

Text

PART 1 OF 2 (FICS ONLY)

Thank you so much to everyone that submitted recommendations this week! There was SO MUCH content, I have to split this week's summary into two parts! A comprehensive list of this week’s fic submissions can be found under the cut! Recommendations are organized by show/media, and any main pairings will be listed after the title.

✨ = 18+ content 🪐 = contains spoilers of a currently running show

Fics:

The Clone Wars: ✨ Rooftop Reunion (Commander Fox x f!Reader) by @wings-and-beskar ✨ Sweet True Lies (Commander Fox x OC Keeda Ionza) by @sleepingsun501 I Fits I Sits (Captain Rex x OC Mira) by @kimiheartblade Cyare (Clone Trooper Sister x f!Reader) by @imarvelatthestars It Happened Quiet by @mercurydancer An Unexpected Chance by @mercurydancer For This Republic I Will Bleed by @captora

The Bad Batch: ✨Stars Beyond Number (Echo x Riyo Chuchi, Gregor x OC Cerra Kilian) by @dystopicjumpsuit ✨ Exigency (Captain Howzer x f!Reader) by @the-rain-on-kamino 🪐 (TBB S3) She Walks in Starlight (Clone Trooper Sister x f!Reader) by @imarvelatthestars A Dead Traitor is a Good Traitor by @hellowkatey 🪐 (TBB S3) Revelation by RheaShay (AO3)

The Book of Boba Fett: ✨ Golden (Garsa Fwip x Fennec Shand) by @btwxsixesandsevens

Star Wars Prequel Trilogy: Shattered Sunrise (Mace Windu x OC Danica Morrow) by @pickleprickle Sahuldeem by @inonibird Agwe by @jedi-valjean

Batman: Home Is Where the Heart Is by LittleLadybugs (AO3) The Lone Ranger Never Had To Deal With Bruce Wayne by @theskeptileptic Your Hands Are To Loud by BatFamily_shenanigans (AO3) Have We Met Before? by @lulurythmea Soft Robin, Sleepy Robin, Little Ball of Trauma by @iselsis Surprise by Racoonwriter (AO3) Patty Cake, Patty Cake, My Brother Ran Away by That_Hippie_Chick (AO3) Play it Again by @jazz020 The Cold (My Burning Promise) by BlueKappa (AO3) Brotherly Wisdom by @olivia-anderson-fanfic Late by breathingsentences (AO3) Not Him by @animemangasoul

Hetalia: Axis Powers: A Matter of Time by @cultureandseptember A Matter of Course by @cultureandseptember TELL ME A PIECE OF YOUR HISTORY by @cultureandseptember

Crossover AUs: Tanjiro & Kagome: A Taishō-Heisei Friendship (Demon Slayer X InuYasha Crossover) by Splashpointparabox (AO3) Life Anew (Batman X Detroit: Become Human Crossover) by BrickSheep (AO3) Steer Yourself (Any Direction You Choose) (The Clone Wars X The Murderbot Diaries Crossover) by antonomasia09 (AO3) The Five Tenets That Mandalorians Must Follow (and the One Thing Worth Breaking Them For) (The Mandalorian X The Murderbot Diaries Crossover) by @urisarang

#ff weekly summary #fic recs

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flyiingsly · 11 months

Text

The Jedi and the Captain

Square : Jedi

Pairing : Howzer x f!jedi!reader

Warnings : Violence, a lot of angst, mention of the Order 66, implied PTSD, reader being strangled, this one is really dark and not fun at all

Wordcount : 3,3K

Summary : After rescuing Howzer and his men from the Empire's ship, you decided to pay them a visit to make sure that they are fine. But when he realizes what you are, the clone Captain suddenly turns into an unexpected menace for you.

A/N : Here is my sixth submission for the @clonexreaderbingo ! Well, I’ve broke my own heart writing this, but I’m happy about how it turned out. Since the beginning I was thinking about giving this fic a sequel, I’ll probably figure it out after submitting all of my CFB’s works. So don’t hesitate to tell me if you’re interested in reading more about what will happen next between these two ! 😊

Disclaimer : I'm still struggling to understand English grammar properly, English is not my native language and even if I have proofread my writtings several times, there is probably still typos in it. I'm very self conscious about it and I apologize for it in advance, but I'm doing my best to do better and I'm actively working at improving my writting skills !

So if you spot a typo, feel free to point it to me so I can correct it, it will be much appreciated :)

After addressing your report about the mission to Rex, you came back to the hangar to check on the men you had just rescued. When you arrived, you could see from afar that Echo and Senator Chuchi were already here, talking to one of them.

She was an old friend of yours who you became close to during the War. You’ve reconnected with her since you had joined Rex’s resistance network with Echo, for she was still sitting at the Senate and sharing the same concern as you about the fate of the clones, and was willing to defend their cause.

The men were sat in a corner, their backs against some containers, talking with Gregor and sharing a comforting cup of caf. They were looking exhausted and distraught. They had probably spent months trapped in a prison cell and the mercy of the Empire, wondering what was going to happen to them. It broke your heart to think about it. You stay here, staring at them for a few seconds before a call pulled you out of your thoughts.

“Hey, (y/n) !” you turn your head at Gregor’s voice, who has get up from the container he was sat on to come to meet you, “Come here, we need to introduce you properly to our guests !”

You headed toward him, and as you get closer, you noticed that the man who the Senator was talking to was a familiar face. You had seen thousands and thousands of clones while fighting among them for the Republic, thousands and thousands of men sharing the same face, but you had always been able to tell them apart. Even without specifics tattoos or marks on their armor, they all had a unique force signature that helped you recognize each one of them. But him, despite his peculiar force signature, was easily identifiable by his haircut and scar on his left cheek.

“Captain, this is (y/n), one of Rex’s most valuable agent ! (y/n), I present to you Captain Howzer !” Gregor exclaims.

“Sir !” you saluted him respectfully, “I’m glad we finally have you and your men here all safe and sound, Sir.”

Of course, he was familiar … You had met him on Ryloth before, on another rescue mission that wasn’t supposed to be a rescue mission in the first place. Things didn’t go as planned this day, as often with the Batch, but neither you nor the other could resigned to let a child alone and frightened, desperately needing her parents back. You made the right choice that day, but unfortunately, your actions were the reason that led Howzer and his men to get arrested and imprisoned by the Empire. You were mostly responsible of their situation, and you knew it.

“Thank you so much for rescuing us” he lets out, looking at both Echo and you, “we owe you our lives, we’ll probably be dead by now if you hadn’t found us …”

Those profounds dark brown pupils were easily recognizable. You recalled coming across them right before you could escape from the Empire's prison. You had your helmet on, so he probably didn’t realize that you were looking at him right in the eyes back then, but still, you were.

It was at that moment that he decided to not stop you from escaping with prisoners. That moment he finally understood that what had been done with the Syndulla family wasn’t right, that it wasn’t what he was supposed to be here and to fight for. It was the very precise moment when he decided to regain his free will and step up against the Empire for the sake of what he used to believe in. His eyes were so clouded and solemn, they seemed to carry so much weight, so much guilt. He must have already understood what was coming for him after that.

You couldn’t help but replay those memories when his gaze met yours again. Except that this time, he could see your face.

“Actually, we already met each other before …” Echo speaks carefully, causing the Captain to look at him with curiosity, “On Ryloth.”

The connection was made pretty quickly in his head.

“Indeed, now that you say it”, he replies thoughtfully, “how could I forget, you were one of those who freed Sham Syndulla …”

You instantly started to feel bad about it, and you could tell that Echo was embarrassed too. Howzer noticed it, for he gave him a kind and reassuring smile.

“I know what you think about, but it’s okay, don’t worry. You had taken the right decision and choose the right path, something I should have done long before too … I was skeptical about the Empire methods for some time to be honest, but crossing your road definitely made me open my eyes … It was some hard times for all of us for sure, but it had to be done …”

He seemed lost in thought for a few moments, taking his time to process the situation. A strange silence fell over the fifth of you. Memories from Ryloth were still washing over your mind, not only from the last time you went there, but from your previous missions on the planet during the Clone Wars as well. Every of your missions with the Batch reminded you of another previous one from back in the days, and you couldn’t help it.

Then, suddenly, you started to feel something strange, some sort of great disturbance in the Force that you couldn’t explain. Something was wrong.

Like if some serious realization had just hit him, his glance landed on you, and he started to insistently staring at you, examining you meticulously. His brows furrowed, and he seemed surprised and confused.

“Wait, you were on Ryloth too, right ? I’ve recognized your armor, and your voice …” his words break the silence as his eyes locked with yours again, but more intensively than before.

“Yes, I was …” you answer hesitantly.

You could feel that something was off with him, something had abruptly changed in the way he was looking at you.

“But you’re not a clone …”

Your entire body began to tense as you could guess what words were coming next. You knew, by the way his eyes were starting to shimmer, that he will soon be coming at a conclusion about what you are. A shiver ran through your spine, his eyes had become darker, and his glare was piercing through you like arrows. He wasn’t himself anymore. You flinched, trying to anticipate his next move, hands ready to defend yourself.

“… I saw what you did earlier, when we were escaping the ship …”

He took a step toward you.

You started to internally panic, you could swear that his body was starting to shake. Echo and Gregor became tensed too, and you caught an expression of incomprehensibility and concern growing on the Senator’s face.

Everyone around knew that him and his men still had their chips on. You were frightened. Since the incident with Wrecker on Bracca, no other clone had tried to attack you, even when they still had their chips on. You and Rex had started to think that maybe their effects were declining over time, and that maybe they weren’t really functioning anymore.

Rex had managed to come back to the junkyard planet to collect the scanner and surgical instruments from the abandoned medbay, so he’ll be able to free his men and recues from this awful burden, just in case it could still be active in some way. But even before the extraction, none of them had ever been violent or menacing toward you. You used to feel safe around them.

But right now, all you wanted to do was disappear, to step backward, to turn back and run away from that situation that seemed doomed to end badly. But you couldn’t move any of your limbs, you were completely petrified. Your heartbeat accelerated, and your breath became more ragged.

“… I know what you are …” he whispers aggressively.

He took another step toward you, silent. He was now just inches from your face, still looking at you right in the eyes. He was so close, he was so handsome. You had saw that face so many times that you knew every detail of it, but you still found it as attractive as the first encounter. It was like staring at every one of those you had loved, then lost. It was heart wrenching and beautiful at the same time.

“Howser, please, calm down …” you hear Gregor says as calmly as possible, but nervousness was still palpable in his intonation.

“It’s ok, don’t worry, I got this” you cut him with the same calm, trying to keep your own voice from stuttering.

Nobody around seemed able to move neither. Everyone seemed like crushed under the weight of the tension. You saw Gregor’s hand slowly reaching for his blaster at the corner of your eye, and Echo gesturing to the Senator to stay behind him. No, you thought, you didn’t want anyone else to get involved into this, you didn’t want more injuries, more suffering, more panic, you just wanted everyone to be safe in this place, like it had always been.

You wanted to escape, but you were too mesmerized by those eyes, and still tetanized by fear. You had already seen that expression before, that look of pure hate and anger, how could you forget … Flashbacks came back to your mind. Flashbacks from the moment when everything changed, flashbacks of the incomprehension, flashbacks of the terror and despair, flashbacks of the Order.

“You shouldn’t even still be alive, you’re a traitor !”

You felt his breaking point becoming closer as his body prepared to take his final step toward you, and then, in a flash, he was on you, reaching for your neck with both of his hands.

“No !” Echo screams, jumping toward you, while Gregor had grabbed his blaster, pointing it at Howzer.

No, you thought again, no more suffering, no more fight, no more brothers hurting each other, not again. What happened with Wrecker was still vivid in your mind, and you didn’t want to go through that again. It was between you and him now.

You pushed them back and disarmed Gregor with the force, keeping Howzer out of their reach, preventing anyone to get injured. His hands were like ferocious claws around your soft skin, squeezing it with all of his strength.

You didn’t even try to fight him, but placed your hands on both sides of his head, which he didn’t seemed to notice in his rage. You were suffocating, but did your best to remain focused. You always had that special ability to ease people’s minds when they were troubled, to influence and calm their emotions. It was a real gift on battlefields to soothe panicking injured soldiers. You wanted to use it on Wrecker, but you didn’t get the chance to, for he was too strong and impossible to control, you couldn’t get close enough from him. You had no idea if it was going to work, but you had to, at least, try.

You kept your eyes planted in his, energy flowing through the palms of your hands. You were absolutely frightened. You could feel the beating of your heart ringing through your ears. It was so loud you barely heard Echo yelling your name. Your vision started to blur and your limbs started to feel numb, your whole body was feeling weak and fragile.

This is it, you though, this is how it’s going to end, by the hands of one of those you considered as your family, trying to make him regain his mind. You instinctively gasp for oxygen, but it was pointless. You felt lost, and on the edge of fainting, but in a last rush of adrenaline, with a pleading look and what was left of air in your lungs, you managed to find enough strength to breath out a couple of last words.

“Please … You … don’t have to … follow orders anymore … you … are free now …”

To hear your voice again, even barely audible, worked like an electroshock on him. You saw the exact moment when his mind switched back to reality. You caught a flicker in his pupils, the light coming back to scare away the darkness.

You felt his sudden realization of what he had just done, and you heart broke when you noticed the tears slowly forming in his eyes. His grip around your neck slowly loosened up, allowing you to finally take a deep live-saving breath before collapsing on the ground, coughing and shaking, your legs unable to support you anymore.

“What have I done ? I’m sorry ! I’m so sorry !” he screams, before falling to his knees right in front of you, sobbing uncontrollably.

Without even thinking about it, you were picking yourself up from the cold concrete to get closer to him, pulling him in a tight and comforting embrace, as Echo and Gregor were hurrying toward you, an alarmed expression on their faces.

“(y/n) ! Are you okay ?” the Arc Trooper asks you, in a complete state of panic.

“It’s ok, I’m ok …” you answered, giving him a nod and a reassuring look to let him know that you had the situation under control now. He immediately understood and stopped in his tracks, keeping Gregor from getting closer.

“I’m a monster …” you hear Howzer mutters between his clenched teeth. You felt so bad for him that you could barely retain your own tears anymore.

“Don’t say that, please” you whisper, trying to calm him down as violent shivers were washing over his body, and trying to prevent your voice from breaking, “it’s not your fault.”

He didn’t answered, unable to speak anymore. You were only wearing the bottom of your armor, and he had grabbed your shoulders by sliding his arms under yours, and was holding on to them so firmly that you thought that his fingers were going to pass through the fabric of your blacks.

There was a moment of hesitation when nobody in the hangar was moving or talking, not knowing what to do, stunned by what they had just witnessed. All you could catch was Senator Chuchi leaving the hangar, escorted by Pantoran guards, a devastated expression on her face, and a glimpse of Gregor and Echo’s muffled conversation.

“We need to bring him to the operating room, he needs to have his chip removed as soon as possible, he’s a danger …” Gregor lets out with concern in his voice.

“Can we at least let him a few moment to calm down ? He looks traumatized, he probably has no idea of what had just happened to him, we’ll need to explain it to him, but right now he’s not ready at all.”

A few second of silence passed over them, then the commando finally answered.

“You’re right, we’re gonna bring him to see a medic first, he’ll probably need a few sedatives after that ...”

A lump grew in your throat as you heard their steps coming toward you.

“(y/n) ?”

You raised your head to look at them, Echo’s gaze was heavy on you.

“You need to let him go, we’re gonna take him to the dispensary.”

“I know, just let us a few more seconds, please.”

He nodded, then turned his head toward two clones standing nearby, gesturing to them to come closer.

“Hey”, you whisper to Howzer, pulling him off of you softly so you can see his face. He looked at you with watery eyes and a desperate look, still attached to your shoulders as you settled your hands on his, gently stroking them.

“I know you’re frightened and confused, but you’re gonna be ok, we’re going to help you, I promise. You’re gonna be taken to the medbay, you need to be examinate, the medics will explain to you what had just happened and why it happened. But don’t be afraid, nobody will judge you for that, it wasn’t your fault.”

“I’m so sorry General …” he breathes out with a trembling voice. You could feel that he was starting to calm down as his hands slowly untightened from your shoulders and fell on his lap.

“You don’t have to, Captain, I’m not mad at you, and I don’t blame you for anything, I just want you to feel better, and you will, right ?”

“Right, General, thank you.”

“Let’s go then.”

You get up on your feet, offering him your hand to help him stand up. He took it, but he lost his balance, and you had to catch him to prevent him from falling back on the ground. He seemed exhausted, and soon, one of the men that Echo had previously called took your place to help support him.

“We need to go, Captain, I’ll come with you.” Gregor tells him.

“Yes sir …” he murmurs, before looking back at you, “General, will I … Will I see you again ?”

His voice was low and hesitant, like if he was ashamed of what he was asking, and afraid of the answer, but desperately needed to know at the same time. You weren’t expecting that, and it make your heart skipped a beat.

“Of course, as soon as the medics will allow me to visit you, don’t worry about that.” You answered with a soft smile.

“Thanks General.”

Then the two clones led him out of the hangar, closely followed by Gregor, who gave you another concerned look. You answered with a nod, meaning that you were fine, and keep watching them until they were out of sight. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn’t even noticed Echo getting closer and nearly jumped when his hand settled on your shoulder.

“Sorry, I didn’t meant to scare you, are you okay ? You’re shaking …” he asks worryingly.

It took you a moment to be able to answer, you were still in shock and processing what had just happened. You absent mindlessly bring your hand to your throat, rubbing it to get rid of the persistent feeling of being strangled, eyes still riveted on the hangar door.

“Yeah, I think that I am, I’m just … I’m just worried about him … It’s the first time that this kind of thing happen since we’ve started the rescues. I was so sure that the effects of the chips had faded, I wasn’t expecting … That.”

“I know, none of us really were, I think … But don’t worry, he’ll be fine once his chip will be gone. He’s going to have a hard time accepting what he did, but I’m sure you’ll find the right words to help him. But for now you need to rest, our last mission was difficult and you need to take some time to recover, don’t you think ?”

You finally looked at him, meeting his gaze. He was sincerely worried about you, and you knew that the said last mission had exhausted him as much as you.

“Yeah, you’re right, and I think that you need some rest too.”

“I can’t deny it … I think that we both deserve a good nap now.” he chuckles.

You smiled at him, you were so glad to have him around in these hard times.

“We do, but I’ll take a shower first !”

As you were both heading toward your quarters, you couldn’t help but keep thinking about the desperate look Howzer gave you while being carried away, and you promised to yourself that you’ll be by his side when he’ll woke up from his surgery.

#cfb2023 #vi writing #howzer x reader #captain howzer #the bad batch #tbb howzer #howzer #the bad batch x reader

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l-lend · 1 year

Text

18+ Content = 🧯

AWOL - Arc Trooper Fives x F!Reader

Budding Romance - Captain Rex x F!Reader

Date Night - Captain Howzer x F!Reader

Guest of Honor - Commander Wolffe x F!Reader

Hair Support - Tup x Reader

Just This Once, Everybody Lives - Captain Rex x Reader

Petals & Pauldrons - Commander Wolf x F!Reader

Shore Leave - Hardcase x F!Reader🧯

Summer Daze, Autumn Daydream - Captain Howzer x F!Reader

Thank You for Your Service - Captain Gregor x F!Reader🧯

#captain howzer x reader #arc trooper fives #fives x reader #arc trooper fives x reader #rex x reader #captain rex x reader #commander Wolffe #commander wolffe x reader #tup x reader #clone trooper tup #hardcase x reader #clone trooper hardcase #captain gregor #captain gregor x reader #gregor x reader

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vodika-vibes · 6 months

Note

Hi love, I already have a second request. Hehehe.

Anyhew.... Howzer, opal and summer please. Thank you. Love oo

Summer Love

Summary: An early morning at the beach reminds you of just how much you love Howzer.

Pairing: Captain Howzer x F!Reader

Word Count: 646

Prompt: Opal - Faithful Love

Warnings: None

Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni

A/N: I hope you like this! I wanted to write Howzer, hence three stories today.

You wake to the sound of waves crashing against the shore. You release a groan and roll onto your side, intent to bury your face in Howzer’s chest and get some more sleep.

Only, as you roll over, you touch nothing by cool sheets.

Blearily you crack open your eyes and peer at his side of the bed. No Howzer. You drop your face into your pillow with a quiet huff, and then roll onto your back and kick the blankets off.

You drag yourself out of bed, pausing only long enough to pull the shirt the Howzer was wearing the day before over your thin tank top, and then you push open the bedroom door and, blindly, walk through the house.

He’s not in the kitchen. Or the living room.

And you yawn widely as you slide open the glass door that leads to the back deck. And there he is, sitting at the table, sipping some caf, and chatting to your neighbor.

The moment you step onto the desk, the conversation stops and Howzer turns his gaze towards you, an adoring smile on his face, “Good morning, cyare.”

“Mor-” a wide yawn cracks your face, “-ning.”

He stands and pulls you into a hug, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, “Did I wake you?”

“Not really,” You press your face against his chest and inhale deeply, enjoying the scent of Howzer mixed when the subtle scent of salt water, “Did you go swimming this morning?”

“It felt more enjoyable than running.” He kisses your forehead once more, and then guides you over to the table and presses his mug into your hands. “You remember Irma?”

You peer at the other woman, her smile looks slightly strained, though you can’t possibly imagine why. “Yes, you told us about the seafood restaurant last night. We enjoyed it a lot.”

Her smile becomes a little more strained, “Well, that’s good.” Her gaze cuts towards Howzer, “but we were having a conversation that you interrupted.”

Howzer’s genial smile fades slightly, “She’s always welcome to join any conversation that I’m a part of.”

Ah.

She has a crush on your Howzer. You can’t blame her, your Howzer is gorgeous, after all.

He’s also completely faithful to you, and you to him.

Your gaze slides across the woman, and you smile gently, “We’re actually about to start breakfast-”

Her face flushes a deep shade of red, “Well then, I’d better go.” She blurts as she stands suddenly, and flees from the deck.

Howzer glances at you, “You hate eating this early.” He says with a slow smile on his face.

“She doesn’t know that.” You reply with a light smile.

“Jealous, cyar’ika?” Howzer lightly tugs you onto his lap, his arms sliding securely around your waist as you bury your face in his neck.

You laugh softly, “Not even a little.”

“Good.” He lightly pushes you back so he can catch your lips in the gentlest kiss, “Because I would choose you over anyone.”

“Anyone?”

“Anyone.”

“Hm…good.” You lightly play with the hair at the base of his head, “Because I would choose you over anyone too.”

His eyes sparkle with mischief, “Even Rex?”

“Rex who?” You reply with a teasing smile.

“Hm, good answer.” He catches your lips in a deep kiss, “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

“I don’t think that’s possible. I have a lot of love.” Howzer murmurs against your lips.

“And it’s all mine, lucky me.” You brush your thumb against the scar on his cheek, “Would you like me to make waffles for breakfast?”

“I would love that.” He replies as he stands with you in his arms, “And then we can go to that aquarium we saw the other day.”

“Sounds like a perfect day to me.” You say with a warm smile, as he carries you back into the house.

#star wars #tbb #vodika vibes 500 followers celebration #captain howzer x reader #howzer x reader #star wars fanfiction #x reader fanfiction #f!reader fic #answered asks

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thecoffeelorian · 4 months

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Chapter Title: The Challenge

Word Count: 1,550 words

Brief Description: Captain Howzer x Female Reader, Captain Howzer x Chandrilan Reader (Singular Love Interest)

Synopsis: When your father declares there will be no marriages for your younger sister until you yourself are wedded first, you assume that’s his way of keeping her single forever. Little do you know, you just might be about to go on the first real adventure of your life…and, more curiously, you might not be going alone. (Slightly inspired by W. Shakespeare’s “Taming of the Shrew” with just a hint of "10 Things I Hate About You" for extra funsies.)

AO3: Link Here

Additional Notes: ...Yes, I'm reposting this because I got so far behind the first time around, I decided to just plain start over so that I could look at this story with fresh eyes. Hope it's not too late for me. Also, my profound thanks for helping me get to 200 followers as of this morning. :D

The No-Pressure Tag List: @trixie2023 @nerfpuncher @burningfieldof-clover @angrypaperearthquake-tbbb-main and anybody else still reading my stuff.

They’re at it again. The same two young men who have been coming here for the past three rotations, and all because they want nothing more than a moment alone with your baby sister, if not she also with one of them. That’s the vibe you get as you slip past them and their entreaties, through the long corridor, and up the somewhat longer staircase leading to the upper floor of your home for some much-needed privacy. Thankfully, they’ve decided to ignore your presence so far, because otherwise, you would be stuck down there having to deal with their whining and their begging about Briana.

Not that they’re really all that interested in “Brainy Bri” in the first place, but of course, that’s the last thing on your mind now. You’ve got bigger plans to deal with, or so you keep telling yourself before you get spotted by someone else within. In fact, at twenty years of age, you thought you might have finally found your way off of a planet that holds no more warmth for you.

Your mother had finally left this world after three months in an end-of-life facility, but only close behind five years of dealing with the terminal illness that came with creating and testing ion cannons. Sometimes you can still see her face in your memory from time to time, provided you close your eyes and concentrate first. Sometimes you also fear becoming just like her if you end up staying on this planet rather than leaving. In any case, though, if you were to suddenly disappear, she wouldn’t be around to try and convince you to return.

Your father, subsequently, had ceased to be able to look you in the face, no doubt because you reminded him of the woman he had so recently lost, as well as the responsibilities that came with being a widower. The least of which, seemingly, had been paying off a few key debts in order to guarantee none of you would have to beg for your next meal…or so he told you. He would probably not pay your disappearance much attention, either, all thanks to his current…‘projects’.

And as for your younger sister, she certainly could have cared less about you even if a Sarlacc swallowed you tomorrow. Thanks to the usual tenets of your shared Chalindran culture, Briana’s upbringing and quiet demeanor has all but handed her a gleaming marriage proposal on a silver serving tray. Your mother’s funeral was the very first place you had spotted her future suitors, the first being the only son of an Admiral; the second, the firstborn son of a Senator from the Mid Rim. Either one would be more than acceptable in the girl’s eyes as well as Father’s, for not only had she grown past the minimum age of fifteen cycles, she was also just so eager to please whatever young fellow crossed her path.

(How disgusting.)

She was quite the opposite of you, perhaps, considering you had begun turning away from your lone surviving parent and eligible bachelors in general at almost the exact same time, as well as letting them know exactly what was on your mind the moment they began pushing for a 'meeting’. Maybe even a little too strongly at times, like…the time a few of your old crystal figurines had just happened to be let loose against your bedroom wall after that young doctor from Coruscant tried to offer you a drink at lunch.

(At least one Chandrilan doctor had thought themselves smart enough to eradicate your mother’s cancer. Turns out, the cancer begged to differ.)

The second time, the silk collector from Naboo had found himself introduced to your carved wooden bench the moment he had offered to buy your late mother’s gowns at half the price she had originally paid for them. Needless to say, he ended up with nothing in either sense.

(Probably a good thing, considering she had promised some of them to you before she’d gone.)

The third time, however, had been the one that got every Chandrilan within hearing range looking at you sideways from that rotation forward, if not also leaving you a wide berth whenever you left the safety of your house and surrounding green. That had been the same day your father let it slip that he’d applied you to the University of Coruscant without your knowledge or, for that matter, your consent. That had also been the same day that your grief and resentment of the past few months finally bubbled out of you, leading you to reveal not only your own applications to the universities of Naboo, Alderaan, and Pantora in that precise order, but also the long-awaited acceptance letter from Naboo with the Queen’s own stamp of approval attached.

And so, after that great argument in which you accused your father of keeping you on too tight a leash, you yourself were accused of the worst ingratitude ever befitting a daughter, and half of your best crystal service ended up shattered upon the ground…you had spent the following three weeks planning your escape.

This will be the same escape where, as long as you gather up all the credits left over from your weekly allowances and sneak out unnoticed, you’ll eventually make it out of Chandrila’s space ports and get yourself on your way to Theed.

Lucky for you, you’ve already made a skill out of sneaking off the grounds, so one more trip beyond your father’s fences should be the easiest thing ever.

This is what brings you tiptoeing back down the stairs just as the boys are arguing with Father himself, no doubt ready to interrogate him on just why he’s decided to keep Briana on the same short leash as you are. Heh. The poor little lost puppies, begging for a treat from their master. Their sad eyes certainly match those of hungry baby mastiffs, all right, or so you think as you draw nearer to the gate.

It’s here that Father decides to liven up the competition between these two, or so it sounds to you as you slip past the three of them.

“…Yes, gentlemen, I do insist. There will be no meetings, betrothals, or anything of the sort with Briana until a husband is found for Y/N!”

A husband. Ha. Small chance of that happening, if not at all, you think, barely registering the groans and protests of the younger boys in the distance. You’ve managed to scare most of your prospects off with your brilliant disposition alone, give or take a few damaged articles of furniture. Not that you’re complaining, of course. If anything, it just makes leaving home a lot easier.

“So, since both of you can’t get engaged to Briana, perhaps one of you would be willing to introduce yourself to Y/N instead…?”

That’s not going to happen any time soon, either, if the blatant denials you hear right before you slip outside tell you anything.

Apparently, at least one of them has already claimed that you’re far too dangerous to even say hello to, let alone attempt to flirt with or even court. That’s perfectly fine with you, though, because neither one of them ever showed enough kriffing intellect to pique your interest, let alone any noticeable kindness, or courage, or willingness to try and deal with the social ills evident in your part of the galaxy. And even if they did, it would take a lot more than a pretty face, a large bank account, and just the right amount of moral teachings to convince you to give any of them a second look.

So, as you lift the hood of your poncho into place and throw the strap of your traveling bag over one shoulder, you can’t help but observe that any quick fix your father hoped to arrange today will evaporate the moment he, Briana, or either one of those suitors end up finding you missing…but only if they catch you first.

Which, of course, you don’t plan on allowing to happen.

No, you’ve planned everything down to the last detail, beginning with your silent ascent into your room to gather up your supplies and then ending the moment you make use of the nearest garren tree to climb successfully over the fence, finally landing quietly upon the ground outside. Neither your family nor any of your household staff have suspected a thing, and even if one of them managed to catch a glimpse of you, you’ve already sworn them to secrecy from your father and sister alike.

This brings a smug grin to your face as you begin your walk down to the space port, your credits and passport safe inside your bag as you go along. He’s not going to decide your future any more, and she can flirt with her suitors as much as she wants without flaunting it in your face.

You, on the other hand, will be enjoying your first breath of Naboo air long before they ever manage to locate you, and probably enjoying the grand tour of the university campus besides.

Or, at least…that’s the last thought on your mind, right before a pair of dark, probing eyes suddenly find their way to yours.

#the bad batch #the bad batch fanfiction #captain howzer #tbb howzer #howzer tbb #howzer x reader #howzer x f!reader #howzer x you #clone trooper howzer #bad batch howzer #chandrila #brush up your shakespeare #howzer fanfiction #ct 7569 #morehowzerfics

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jetii · 1 month

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To the General

Pairing: Howzer x fem!Reader / Howzer x Jedi!Reader

Words: 14,310

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only! angst, hurt/comfort, themes of grief/death/mourning, some blood/gore, depression, hallucinations, unrequited feelings, mutual pining, smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), some light dom/sub dynamics, a little cockwarming

Summary: It's been over a year since Howzer has lost his General, and yet, the ghost of your memory still haunts him. His guilt and grief threaten to swallow him whole, until Rex returns to the base with a surprise visitor.

A/N: Reposting because I forgot my taglist. 🤦‍♀️ No excuse for the word count I fear. I just love Jedi/Clone forbidden love with all my heart, and I love writing dramatic reunions even more.

Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist

Howzer doesn’t remember how it happened.

Their arrival on Ryloth had come on the heels of an overdrawn battle on Bothawui. The entire battalion was teetering on the edge of exhaustion by the time they had boarded The Eclipse. Their hopes of an extended shore leave were quickly dashed as it was announced by order of the Jedi Council and the Chancellor himself that they would be sent to occupy Ryloth indefinitely.

The General had tried to make the most of it. She’d arranged for the mess to cook the finest meal they could get their hands on, which admittedly wasn’t more than some fresh meats and root vegetables, but the crew didn't complain. And if Howzer caught the smell of alcohol floating about when they walked to their stations, he didn't say anything about it.

Still, no amount of finery or good cheer could hide the truth: the crew was worn ragged and the battalion was ready to snap. The men resolved to keep pushing on for the sake of their General, who had taken their heavy losses the hardest. That night, she’d broken into tears over the new helmets lining their memorial wall, a wall that was nearly full.

Howzer had been with her, had stood with her and her tears. He had seen the General in every state of grief, of anger and pain. He'd also seen her at her very best. He'd seen her bright smile and heard her warm laugh. He'd been there for the moments of victory and the moments of defeat.

She was his General and his closest friend, his guiding star, and he would do anything for her.

Howzer doesn’t remember how it happened, but he does remember her. He remembers everything about her.

His first memory is her as a young commander, and the first time he saw her. It was on Kamino, and the first time she had visited. She'd been there with her Master, who had come to assess the cadets' progress. They had all lined up in neat rows for the inspection. Howzer remembers how tall she had looked in her uniform and cape despite how all the men towered over her.

Howzer can't remember what she said or did. But he can recall her eyes and the warmth in them as she walked past them. He had wanted her to look at him.

His second memory is the first time they met, months later. It was shortly after the start of the war, and the 318th was still in its infancy. The General had just arrived to pick her new battalion up, and as her new Captain, Howzer was part of the honor guard.

Howzer doesn’t remember the words they spoke, only that she was kind and her voice was warm, and when she smiled, the whole world seemed to brighten.

In the years that followed, he got to know her and became her aide. They were together almost every day. They spent time with their men and led them through the horrors of war. She was a natural leader, charismatic and inspiring, and it wasn't long before Howzer was completely devoted to her.

But the war continued, and so did the death. They had lost men and friends, and Howzer had to watch the General suffer each time. Her pain was his. How could it not be?

She was the best thing in his life, his bright light in the darkness, and he was in love with her.

Howzer doesn’t remember when he began thinking of her that way. He thinks he might’ve always loved her, always wanted her. Maybe from the moment he saw her in that corridor.

All he knew is that he'd loved her in every possible way a man could love a woman, just as he knew that his love would never be reciprocated.

But it didn't matter.

As long as he was with her, Howzer would pretend, and he was okay with that. He could live with loving her from afar and keeping his feelings in check. As her Captain, his job was to support her, and he would be the best damn Captain she'd ever had.

He could dream of a different reality where she returned his feelings, one where they were not at war, and maybe one where he was not her clone trooper. He would dream of a life where he could hold her and touch her, where he could kiss her and whisper how much he loved her.

But those were dreams, and nothing more.

And reality was very different now.

Now, the General is nothing more than a memory.

It’s been long enough that pieces of her are starting to fade from his mind, and he hates it. He wants to hang on to her as long as possible, but he knows that his memories are all he has left. He doesn’t have a holo or picture of her. He only has the images in his mind and the broken piece of nova crystal he kept tucked away in his pocket.

Howzer doesn't remember how it happened.

But he knows it’s his fault.

Howzer is the one who let her down. He's the reason she died. He must be, even if he can't remember it, because he can't accept any other reality. He was her Captain and her right-hand man, her closest friend and her most devoted soldier. If she died, it was because he had failed her, and he will never forgive himself for it.

Maybe he deserves to forget.

That thought is worse than the one of her death.

There was a time when he had wondered if his love was a sickness, something to be ashamed of and hidden away. He didn't want his brothers to know and judge him, and he didn't want her to know, either. He'd never acted on his desires. He'd never told her, and maybe that's why this is so much worse.

Maybe this is a punishment, and one he deserves.

He knows he must have done something wrong, something terrible, because no man would be this cursed unless they deserved it. The nightmares, the guilt, the emptiness, it had to be some kind of retribution for his transgressions.

He's tried to forget. He's tried to move on. He's tried to be a better man, a better clone. He's tried to do everything that a good soldier should, but no matter what he does, no matter how hard he tries, his mind always drifts back to her. His thoughts always wander to his memories. He can't shake her. He doesn't know how to. He's never known how.

Every time he closes his eyes to sleep, he sees her. She's the same as the last time he saw her, with her armor and her hair up in its braid, and she is beautiful. Howzer is so happy to see her again, so relieved that she's not gone.

But she is, and he has to tell her.

He tries, but the words don't come out right. Or maybe it's just that he can't say them, that he still doesn't want to accept what had happened after all this time. But the words are stuck in his throat, and his eyes burn, and Howzer knows she's waiting for him to answer her.

And he can't.

She's waiting for him, and he can't.

She deserves to know the truth. She needs to know that she died, that he failed her, and that her death is on his hands.

Howzer can't look at her. He can't face her.

He closes his eyes and waits for her to turn away. He waits for her to leave him, because he doesn't deserve her.

She doesn’t.

Instead, she steps forward and takes his hands into hers. He flinches at her touch, because she shouldn’t be here. She isn't real. She's just another figment of his imagination, his punishment, and he wants her to stop. He can't do this anymore.

"Howzer," she says. "Howzer, look at me."

And he does. He can't help himself. Her face is starting to blur in his memory, he can't remember the exact shade of her eyes, and he doesn't want to forget. Not yet. He opens his eyes and looks at her, but he knows what he'll find.

Blood.

Her blood.

On his hands, on his face, on his chestplate.

There's so much of it, and he can't stop staring at it, at the way it coats her armor and drips onto the floor. He can't look away. He can't do anything.

"Look at me, Howzer," she says again.

But he can't. He can't do it.

He can't look at her, not like this. He can't stand the thought of seeing her face covered in blood, her lifeless eyes staring at him, her body cold and broken and gone.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he whispers. "It's all my fault."

"No," she says.

She doesn't say anything else, and Howzer wants to scream. He wants to cry. He wants her to yell at him and berate him, to curse him and hate him. But when he finally gains the courage to look her in the eye, there's nothing there. She's gone.

It's the worst thing he could've imagined.

He's alone.

Last night’s nightmare plays over and over again in his mind as he stands at the holotable, looking over the map and trying not to think of the General.

It's hard. It's always been hard, but it's gotten worse over the last few months. The dreams are more frequent, and the pain is more intense. He doesn't know how to stop them, or if they will ever stop.

He thought it would get better when he joined Rex's group, that he would find some semblance of peace with the other clones fighting the good fight, but he was wrong.

There is no peace for him, not after what he did.

The others are talking around him, but Howzer is only half listening. It's the usual stuff: what their next move will be, how many supplies they have, and the list goes on. Rex is expected to return from a meeting with Senator Chuchi any minute, and this meeting is more about making sure the captain is updated on what he missed.

But the details escape Howzer. He's distracted by his thoughts, and his guilt is eating at him. It's all he can think about, and he can't shake the feeling that he doesn't deserve to be here.

"Howzer."

The sound of his name brings him back to reality, and he realizes everyone is looking at him.

"Uh, sorry," he says. "What was the question?"

Echo studies him. His gaze is intense, and Howzer has the distinct impression that he's being read. It's a disconcerting feeling, one that he's felt more than a few times in the last couple months since his rescue, and it makes him feel transparent. Like his armor is gone and his emotions are on display.

But that can't be the case, because Howzer hasn't told him what happened.

No one knows the truth, not even the men. Howzer hasn't told anyone about his part in his General's death, and he's not planning to either. There's no point in dredging up the past. He knows he’s not the only clone with guilt about what happened to the Jedi, what they had done.

He’s just the only one who can’t seem to let it go.

"I asked if you were alright," Echo says. "You've seemed a little off the last few days.”

Howzer nods.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he says. "Just a little tired."

The lie slips off his tongue easily, and it's one he's told more than a few times before. He's not fine, and he hasn't been since that day, but there's no need to burden his brothers with his problems.

Echo doesn't look convinced, and he's about to open his mouth to ask another question when Rex finally arrives. The captain's entrance is followed by a chorus of greetings and welcomes, and the tension in the room dissipates. The men are happy to see him, and Howzer is thankful for the distraction.

The Captain greets the men, and then he turns to Howzer.

"Howzer," Rex says. "Do you mind if I speak to you privately?"

"Of course not, Captain," Howzer answers.

Rex leads Howzer out of the command center and down the corridor. The walk is silent, and Howzer can feel the tension building between them. Rex hasn't said a word, and he has no idea why he wants to talk to him. Maybe it's about his recent performance, or lack thereof. He hasn't been the most reliable or helpful lately.

Howzer is starting to worry in earnest when they turn, moving away from the section of the compound that holds Rex's makeshift office and toward the doors leading out to the landing zone. Walking slightly in front of him, Rex is tense, his shoulders stiff and his jaw set. Whatever he has to say, it must be serious.

Rex finally stops in front of the closed blast doors and turns to Howzer. His expression is neutral, and it's impossible to tell what's going on in his head.

"Rex," Howzer begins, unable to bear the silence any longer, "if this is about my work, I understand. I haven't been on top of things the last few days, and if you need to put someone else on comms, I—"

Rex puts his hand up.

"That's not why I asked you out here, Howzer," Rex says. "There's someone here you need to see."

Howzer raises an eyebrow, confused.

"I don't understand," he says. "Who's here?"

"Just follow me."

Rex punches in a code, and the doors slide open. The light from outside fills the hallway, and Howzer blinks at the sudden brightness. He steps out into the landing zone, following Rex into the sunlight. The air is warm and dry, and he can already feel the heat radiating from the cracked duracrete beneath his boots.

"What are we doing out here, Rex?" he asks.

Rex doesn't answer, just keeps walking across the landing zone toward the ship. The Remora stands alone on the platform, ramp already drawn. Howzer squints in an effort to see inside the darkness of the vessel, looking for a spot of white plastoid among the shadows.

But what steps forward isn’t a clone at all.

Howzer recognizes you instantly, and he suddenly feels like he’s about to faint.

His vision tunnels, and the world tilts on its axis. He can hear his heart pounding in his ears, and his breath is coming too fast, too hard. There's a roaring sound, like the sound of a rushing river, and it drowns out everything else. He feels sick, and his legs are shaking.

It can't be real. It can't be.

But it is.

There’s a loud clang, and he dimly realizes his helmet has fallen from his hands. It's lying on the ground now, at his feet, but he can't seem to find the strength to pick it up. All he can do is stare.

You descend the ramp slowly and place a hesitant foot onto the ground. The corners of your lips curl into an uncertain smile, while Howzer remains frozen, trapped in disbelief.

You take a step forward, and he still doesn't move. He's rooted to the spot, his heart racing, and he's afraid.

Howzer knows he's hallucinating. He's been here before. This isn't the first time you've appeared to him, not the first time you've looked at him with those warm eyes and called his name. But every time he reaches out, the mirage vanishes. He's tried. He's tried so hard to reach you.

He knows he's going to wake up, and you will be gone again.

It doesn't stop him from wanting to believe that it's real. That you're here.

Your smile falters when you notice his helmet on the ground, and Howzer watches your eyes search his. They're the same as they've always been, bright and kind, and full of concern. It's too much. It's always been too much.

"Howzer," you say. "Are you okay?"

"No," he says.

You step closer, and Howzer instinctively backs away. You stop. Your brows furrow, and your eyes fill with hurt, and it makes his stomach twist. He wants to go to you, to pull you close and hold you, but he doesn't. He can't.

This isn't real. None of it is real.

He has to tell you.

"What do you mean? What's wrong?" you ask.

You're still walking toward him, and Howzer has to force himself not to run. He has to stop this before it goes any further. He can't let himself fall prey to his delusions, not again.

"No, it's not real," he says.

You frown. "What's not real?"

"You," he whispers. "You're not real. None of this is."

You stop, your eyes wide and worried. "Howzer, what are you talking about?"

He ignores you. He has to make you understand.

"You're dead," he says. His voice breaks on the last word, and it comes out as a choked sob.

The words hang between the two of you, and Howzer braces himself for the inevitable. He knows what will happen. You'll disappear. He's seen it happen enough times, and he can't bear to go through it again.

He closes his eyes and tries to focus, to steady his breathing and keep the tears at bay.

But when he opens his eyes, you're still there.

And then the impossible happens.

You move forward, and he doesn't stop you. He doesn't flinch or back away when you reach out and put your hands on his shoulders. He can't.

Your touch is solid. Real.

You're real.

His legs give way, forcing him to collapse heavily onto his knees. He can't bear the weight anymore. The grief, the guilt, the shame. It's too much.

“I failed you, General,” he says around the lump in his throat threatening to choke him. Howzer squeezes his burning eyes shut, willing the tears away, but they come regardless. He feels his body tremble, his shoulders shaking as he fights against the sob rising in his chest. He tries to take a deep breath, but his lungs won't cooperate, and all he manages is a choked gasp.

“I…I’m so sorry.”

"Howzer, Howzer, please look at me."

It's not a request.

Your voice is commanding, the way he remembers, and it's enough to coax him into opening his eyes. Looking at you directly is almost too painful to bear, like looking directly at Ryloth’s sun, but he does.

Tears are streaming down your face, but a gentle smile still curves your lips. The hand on his shoulder moves to cup his face, thumb tracing the marred skin of his cheek. Unbidden, the memory of you holding him when he received the wound years ago comes to mind. Howzer hadn't seen it then, but the affection is clear now.

"It's okay," you say, softly.

"It's not," he replies. "I shouldn't have let you go."

Your hand moves to his jaw, and you gently tilt his chin upwards. He wants to lean into the touch, to bask in the warmth of your skin, but he can't. He doesn't deserve this. Not after what he did.

"I should've known. I should've—"

"Stop," you cut him off.

Your voice is firm, but the hand on his jaw is soft and gentle, and your eyes are still kind. He wants so badly to believe that this is real, that you're really here, but the doubts linger. He can't let himself fall into the illusion. He can't let himself lose you again.

"You can't blame yourself for this, Howzer. It wasn't your fault."

"I failed you."

"No, Howzer," you say. "You didn't."

He doesn't know what to say. Your hand is still on his face. Your fingers are trembling.

“I forgive you," you whisper the words softly, and it's more than he deserves. "I forgave you long ago."

It's too much.

His composure breaks, and he wraps his arms around your hips, burying his face in your stomach. His tears are hot and wet, and they soak through the fabric of your shirt. His sobs are loud and broken, and he can barely breathe, but he can't stop, and you don't push him away. The hand on his cheek cups the back of his head, and your other arm wraps around his shoulders.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers.

He isn't sure if you hear him. He's not sure if he wants you to. But you must, because your grip tightens, and your hand runs through his hair.

He holds you, clinging to you like a lifeline, and lets the tears flow. He can't hold back the sobs, the pain, the anger. All of the emotions are coming to the surface, and they won't be held back any longer.

He cries for you, for the pain you endured. For the loss and the hurt. He cries for himself, for the guilt and the shame. He cries because it hurts, and because he's relieved, and because he can't believe this is real and he's so kriffing happy to see you again.

When his tears finally stop, you're still there, still holding him, and he's still kneeling in front of you. His shoulders are stiff, his muscles sore, but he can't find the strength to move.

He doesn't want to.

He wants to stay like this forever.

Eventually, you break the silence.

“Is there somewhere we can go to speak in private?” you ask quietly. Your fingers run through the buzzed hair at the back of his head and linger on the scar there, the one he doesn’t have a story for. A shiver runs down his spine before his brain catches up to your question.

Howzer nods and clears his throat.

"Yeah," he says, his voice hoarse. "My room. We can talk there."

You help him stand, and he takes a moment to collect himself, wiping his eyes. When he looks at you again, he feels a hot sting of embarrassment. It's been a long time since he's let himself fall apart like this, and he's not sure how to act, and he's grateful there's no one else around to witness it.

You don't seem bothered by his breakdown. You smile, and it's soft and warm, and his heart does a strange flip.

"Are you okay?" you ask, and your concern is so genuine that it almost brings fresh tears to his eyes. His emotions feel raw, like an open wound, and he's not sure how much more he can take before he's completely overwhelmed, but when he answers this time, he speaks the truth.

"I will be," he says as he kneels to collect his helmet.

You nod, and there's a hint of relief in your eyes, but the smile on your face never wavers as you step up to his side. He’s surprised to feel your hand threading through the crook of his elbow before he realizes it was he who had held out his arm for you. A force of habit he didn't know he still had, but one that was very welcome.

It had always been your way, before. To walk beside him instead of ahead.

He takes a deep breath and straightens his shoulders.

"Shall we?"

"Yes," you say, smiling.

As the two of you begin to make your way across the landing zone, Howzer can't help but marvel at how natural this feels. The familiarity of your presence at his side, the soft pressure of your hand against his arm, and the sound of your breathing.

All of it feels so right, and Howzer thinks it must be a dream, a hallucination, something, because this is too perfect. It can't be real. It's been far too long for it to be real.

But the weight of your arm on his and the sound of your footsteps at his side feel real, more real than anything he's ever experienced. He's never had a hallucination this vivid before. He hopes it's not just a dream, but he keeps his eyes on you just to make sure.

You look different. Older, maybe. But also more beautiful.

It's a silly thought, but it's the truth. There's a certain peace and calmness to your expression, and it suits you. You look content, like you've finally found what you were looking for, and Howzer feels a rush of joy.

You're alive.

He still can't quite believe it, and he finds himself staring openly at you. He knows the path to his room like the back of his hand, and he could probably make the trek with his eyes closed. But he doesn't.

Instead, he keeps his eyes on you, memorizing every detail, every curve of your face and every twitch of your mouth. He's desperate to fill in the gaps in his memory, the details he's lost and the moments that slipped away. He doesn't want to forget again.

Your head is on a swivel as you take in the equipment and clones bustling around the enclosed space inside the temple. It reminds him of your first day, and he can't help but smile. You haven't changed at all.

Echo and Rex are in the command center along with a handful of other clones. They watch as the two of you walk through, their faces showing a range of expressions from surprise to confusion to suspicion. But they say nothing, and Howzer is grateful. He knows how he looks, with his reddened eyes and blotchy cheeks. They’ll no doubt have questions later, but for now, they keep them to themselves.

“What you’ve built here is impressive,” you say as you give a friendly smile to Samson when you pass by. He does a double-take, his gaze moving from your face to your arm wrapped around Howzer's, and back to your face again.

Howzer smiles back and doesn't offer any explanation.

Samson isn't the only one looking. Several of the men stare, and Howzer can't help the small thrill of pride that courses through him at their wide-eyed looks.

It's a silly thought, he knows. He shouldn't feel good about being seen with you, not after everything that's happened. But he can't deny the satisfaction he feels at the thought that the men can see the two of you together again, and he wonders how many of them had guessed about his feelings.

Probably all of them.

"This is it," Howzer says as the two of you stop outside the door to the room he claimed as his own.

It's not much—a single bed, a locker, and a desk—but it's enough. It's a quiet place to escape to when the chaos of the galaxy around him becomes too much, though he hasn't spent much time in it since he arrived.

Howzer steps forward and places his hand on the panel, and the door slides open. He motions for you to enter first, and you do, letting go of his arm as you step into the room.

You take a moment to study your surroundings before your eyes land on the lone chair in the room. Howzer can tell what you're thinking. You're going to offer it to him, and he doesn't want it. He can't imagine sitting right now. His legs still feel like jelly and his whole body is still buzzing from the adrenaline of seeing you.

Instead, Howzer leans against the wall by the door and takes a deep breath, watching as you walk forward to examine his desk, your back to him.

The room is quiet, the only sound the faint buzzing of the lights above them. He can't hear the commotion outside. He can't even hear his own heartbeat. All he can hear is you, your soft, slow breathing and the gentle rustle of fabric as you move.

He hesitates to break the silence, but he has to know.

“How are you—how did you survive?” he asks. How are you alive, he wants to say. You shouldn’t be alive. The words stick in his throat.

You stiffen slightly, but you don't turn around. The latest report on their medical supplies is held loosely in your grasp, and Howzer watches the datapad tremble slightly.

“You truly don’t remember?” you ask softly, dropping the report back onto the desk. You pivot to face him, your back pressing into the metal edge, and he can't read your expression.

He swallows. His throat feels dry, and his heart is pounding in his ears.

No. He doesn’t remember. But he needs to.

He shakes his head, the motion almost imperceptible. “No, I…I remember we were speaking in your quarters. I can’t remember what about. There was an incoming transmission, and then…nothing.”

Whatever he said, it must not have been the right thing. Your eyes close as if in pain, your fists clenching at your sides. You inhale a sharp, shaky breath. The sight is almost enough to make him drop the subject. But the need to know is greater than the guilt.

“Please." He says your name quietly, hating the desperation that creeps into his voice. "I need to know.”

He realizes that he’s never called you by your first name before, at least not to your face. It had always been General. He thinks he likes the sound of it, and the way it makes your eyes fly open, surprise and a little bit of warmth filling their depths.

The seconds drag on as he waits for your response, the tension palpable between you. The longer he stares at you, the more he notices. Your jaw is sharper now, your skin slightly more tan. Your hair is the same, and so are your eyes, but there's a new air of maturity to you that hadn't been there before. He's not sure how he feels about the changes, only that he wishes he had been there to see them happen.

When you finally speak, the words are careful and measured. “I can show you, if you let me.”

"Show me?"

"If I'm allowed, I could—"

"Yes," he says. He doesn’t hesitate. He trusts you, and he needs to know what happened.

"Okay," you say, taking a step toward him. "This may hurt."

A moment of silent understanding passes between you before Howzer nods, steeling himself for whatever revelation awaits. You reach out tentatively, pausing a few inches away, and he closes his eyes.

Your fingers press into his temple, and he’s suddenly thrust back into your quarters on Ryloth.

“You seem upset,” your voice says, wavering as if underwater until the haze of the memory begins to lift around you.

The blurry shape of you comes into sharper focus as you move to sit on your bunk. Your beige robes have been discarded, revealing the sleeveless wrap tunic you wear underneath. Another hot evening on Ryloth meant you'd forgone decorum again, loosening the top to allow airflow to your sweat-slicked skin. He remembers admiring the strong lines of your biceps and valley of your breasts revealed with the motion.

He’s in the memory but not entirely, watching himself from the outside like a specter in the shadows. Howzer watches as he forces himself to look away from your body to stare out the window. He can feel the same tension, the same anxiety that gripped him then. He remembers the argument you had that morning. Remembers the hurt, the pain, the guilt. Remembers wanting to reach out, to hold you, but stopping himself.

“What’s on your mind?”

“You,” he answers honestly, for once. It’s a half-truth that sticks to his tongue. “Is it true that this will all be over soon?”

“I’ve felt it coming for a while now,” you say.

Your eyes drift to your hands, and he turns to watch you lace your fingers together tightly in your lap. “Count Dooku is dead. Obi-Wan has moved to engage General Grievous. Saesee and General Windu are arresting the Chancellor as we speak. The war very well may be over now.”

“I see.”

A sense of fatigue washes over him, and he leans against the wall to prop himself up. He wants to leave, to soak the feeling in while in the silence of his own barracks, but something stronger urges him to stay.

“Permission to speak freely, sir.”

“You always have my permission, Howzer,” you say earnestly. It had taken some getting used to, being addressed so informally. The first few times, he'd had to force himself not to jump to attention every time you called him by name. He quickly started to enjoy the intimacy of it, and the way the sound of his name on your lips made him shiver.

He sighs, rubbing his eyes with the palms of his hands. He doesn't know where to begin. The last few months have been hard, harder than most, and it's left him feeling raw and exhausted. He's never felt so torn before. Part of him is thrilled that the war is ending, but the other part, the larger, selfish part, is terrified.

“What will happen to us?” he asks, turning to look at you.

Your face is neutral, but he can tell by the set of your jaw that you're tense. The memory of you takes a moment to collect yourself before speaking.

"What do you mean?"

"After the war," he says, trying and failing to keep the edge of panic out of his voice. "What will happen to us?"

“The clones have fought honorably for the Republic. It’s the least we can do to provide for your future,” you reply. “You’ll be given pensions and housing on Coruscant for as long as you all wish. I expect some will continue their roles in reserve, while the rest will be free to choose their own path.”

He nods appreciatively. He has no idea what he would do with such freedom, but he's grateful all the same. The thought of no longer having a purpose terrifies him, but not nearly as much as the thought of losing you.

He should leave it at that, he should thank you and walk away. Howzer is watching the internal battle he faced on that day and screams at himself to leave. He should leave you be, to enjoy the brief respite the two of you are allowed.

But he can't. Not when this could be the last chance he ever gets.

“Thank you. But I…I meant us, sir.” Howzer gestures between the two of you.

Your eyes widen almost imperceptibly, but he can see he’s stunned you. He forges ahead, moving to stare at the wall behind you so he can maintain his courage. “We’ve been together so long, I can barely remember a time without you. Without this. I don't want it to end."

There's a pregnant pause as you struggle for a response, and the fear in the pit of his stomach grows.

“What are you saying?” you ask slowly.

“I’m saying I want more,” he says. He meets your gaze and steps forward, and you rise to your feet at the same time, your tunic fluttering around you.

“Us clones try not to think about the future, but I can't help it. And the only future I want is one with you. That is, if you want that too, sir."

His cheeks are flushed, and his heart is pounding, and he's so nervous. This is the most he's ever confessed, and it feels like the world is crashing down around him, but he means every word.

“Howzer…” Your voice breaks, and it sends a hammer to his heart. “I…I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you feel the same,” he says quickly. Howzer’s hand reaches out to grasp your bicep, thumb caressing the bare skin underneath his glove. He moves closer, and your breath hitches as you lean back, but not away.

Your eyes close, head tilting down. He waits with bated breath for you to say something, anything.

When you look up, your eyes are filled with tears, and his stomach drops. Your voice is so quiet, he can barely hear you.

“I feel afraid.”

It's like the wind has been knocked out of him. He opens his mouth to speak, to question you further, but his vambrace begins to ping, the message marked urgent. Howzer watches himself let go of you and turn to receive the transmission, and he feels like he's drowning.

No! He screams at himself. Don't take the call. He can't breathe, can't think, can't do anything but watch. You can't let this go. If you lose this chance, you'll never have another.

He's frozen, helpless to watch his past play out. You move toward the window to look out at the setting sun as Howzer opens the encrypted message.

“Execute Order 66,” the hooded figure on the holo speaks, its voice graveled and dark. In his memory, Howzer stares down at the projection with wide, unseeing eyes, before he begins to shake. Something is taking over, something he isn’t strong enough to control.

He knows what he must do.

A cold, heavy weight settles in the pit of his stomach, and his mind feels foggy, sluggish. Howzer looks up from the holo, and the room seems to spin. His hands are trembling, and his heart is pounding in his ears. He blinks hard, once, twice, trying to clear the fog, but it won't go away. A wave of nausea hits him, and his head feels like it's about to explode.

"Howzer?"

Your voice is far away, barely a whisper. You turn, your lips parted, brow creased.

He barely has time to get the words out, to fight the fog for just a second. Just one more second.

"Run," he croaks. He watches his eyes glaze over, watches the last remnants of his control slip through his fingers as he turns, drawing his blaster and firing.

You ignite your lightsaber just in time to deflect the shot aimed at your head. Behind the teal blue glow of your blade, your eyes are wide and confused.

“Howzer?” you ask incredulously. Your arms are raised, holding your saber aloft. But your stance is hesitant, your knees bent as if ready to run.

The blaster is in his hand, and it's pointed at you. It's an impossible weight. A weapon made for killing, a weapon he can't use on you. His hand trembles, and he wills himself to throw it, to break it.

But the fog in his mind is too thick, the orders too loud, and his body moves without him. The trigger clicks under his finger again and again. You duck and roll as a bolt goes whizzing over your head, deflecting another into the ceiling. Plaster and dust rain down, clouding the air around you. You cough, covering your nose and mouth with the back of your free hand.

"Howzer, please, it's me!" you cry, raising the hilt of your saber. It's not meant to fight, only to protect. A shield against the bolts that won't stop coming.

He's screaming at you, screaming for you to move, to run away, but the words aren't leaving his mouth. The next bolt grazes your shoulder, tearing your tunic. The pain makes you cry out. Howzer can see the wound, red and angry against your skin.

He hears the sound of footsteps and voices getting closer outside the door, but he’s too occupied with the need to fire his blaster to acknowledge them. Howzer’s mind screams that he’s trapped alone with a traitor to the Republic, a burning hatred he’s never felt propelling him forward to attack.

The small voice inside him begging him not to hurt you is silenced for good when an unseen force rips the weapon from his hand. His arm is held aloft above his head, and he struggles like an animal in a trap to free it.

His eyes are wide and feral. Yours are nothing but pleading.

"Please," you beg. "You're stronger than this. I know you are. I can't hurt you."

"Traitor," he spits, struggling against the invisible bonds. "You'll die a traitor."

There are tears streaming down your face now, and he can see the agony in your eyes. The anguish and pain. But also a strength, a determination he's seen many times.

Fists are pounding on the door, and it tears your attention away from him for a moment too long. Howzer’s arm frees itself, and he wastes no time reaching for the blaster carbine on his back. Your eyes snap back to him, and you quickly hold out both hands to push him back into the wall.

Even during training, you were remarkably gentle with your use of the Force. Howzer had seen you throw boulders and pull tanks with your command of the unseen energy field, but he’d never felt more than a soft touch until that day.

But in this memory, you hurl him across the room with the force of a landslide, knocking the breath clear from his lungs, his head slamming hard enough to crack the duracrete.

He tries to stand, but he can't.

His arms won't work, and his legs are leaden, refusing to respond. He's helpless as he watches you raise your arm, your eyes filled with sorrow. He's powerless as you reach out and touch your fingers to his temple.

A warmth emanates from your fingertips, and Howzer feels the pressure in his skull building, building, until—

The memory vanishes, and Howzer finds himself back in his own quarters, slumped against the wall. You're still there, standing a few steps away. You have your arms crossed tightly, your jaw clenched.

Howzer can feel his head pounding, a throbbing phantom pain where it had struck the wall. He raises his fingers to rub his temples.

It's quiet. There's no pounding on the door, no gunfire. Just the two of you.

"So it's true. I almost killed you."

You flinch. It's so subtle, he wouldn't have noticed it if he hadn't been looking for it.

"You didn't," you say.

He shakes his head. "I didn't? It looked pretty fucking close. You did that—" He motions vaguely toward the door. "—to stop me."

"To stop myself," you correct. "You didn't have a choice. I couldn't hurt you."

Howzer's jaw clenches, and his throat feels tight. The memory is still fresh in his mind, and the feelings it elicited are not ones he'd like to relive. The shame, the fear, the guilt.

"But I did," he says. His voice is low, and his tone is grave. "I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry, too," you whisper, your voice barely audible. You look away from him, and your shoulders droop. "I didn't know. If I'd known the clones had been reprogrammed, I would have tried to find a way to reverse it. To bring you back. All of you."

You sniff, wiping your eyes, and Howzer feels his chest ache. You're blaming yourself. Of course you are.

"Howzer, if there's anything I can do—"

"Don't apologize," he says. His voice is stronger now, and he's glad. He's tired of being weak. Having you here is a reminder of everything he's done wrong, but also of what he could have. What he wants. He straightens, pulling himself away from the wall and standing upright.

"You saved my life. You didn't know what was going to happen. No one did. And even if you had, it would have been too late."

Your brows knit together, and you look back at him. Your lower lip trembles. "How can you forgive me?"

Howzer doesn't know how to answer that. He's not sure there is an answer. Instead, he walks forward, slowly, as if approaching a skittish animal. You look so small, so vulnerable, and he hates it. He can see the worry in your eyes, the guilt. It's the same worry and guilt he's seen in the mirror every day since the war ended.

He's only a step away when he stops, leaving enough space between the two of you that you could walk away if you wanted. But you don't, and the look in your eyes is enough to make him reach out. He wipes a tear from your cheek, and the corner of your mouth twitches.

"How can you forgive me?" he asks instead.

"Because you were doing your duty. Because I care about you. Because I missed you," you say.

"I missed you, too."

You're so close, close enough to touch, and Howzer can't resist the urge. He wraps his arms around you and pulls you into a hug, letting the tension ease from his body. You lean into his embrace, and he rests his chin on top of your head, closing his eyes and savoring the feeling of having you back.

He's not sure how long the two of you stand there, lost in the embrace, but eventually, you pull away. Howzer reluctantly lets go, dropping his arms back to his sides. You look up at him, and the smile on your face makes his stomach flip.

"What you said," you start, swallowing. "That night. Did you mean it?"

He doesn't have to think.

"Yes."

Your breath hitches, and your eyes search his, seeking something. He knows what it is, and it scares him. The last time he laid his heart bare for you, he’d lost everything. But he's spent too much time living in the past. Too much time wishing things were different, regretting the choices he made.

He doesn't want to do that anymore.

"I meant it then, and I still mean it now."

"Really?"

"I do."

He reaches out and takes your hand, lifting it to his lips.

You bite your lip. He can tell you're nervous, and he feels the same. His stomach is fluttering, and his heart is racing. The moment seems surreal, too good to be true.

But he can feel the warmth of your palm in his, can feel the softness of your skin.

"I missed you," he says softly.

"I missed you, too."

Your words are barely a whisper, but they echo in his mind. He can't resist any longer.

"I want to kiss you,” he admits, his voice low. He runs his thumb over the back of your hand, and your skin tingles beneath his touch. "Can I kiss you?"

"Yes," you whisper.

He leans down, pressing his forehead against yours. Your eyes flutter shut, and your breath tickles his lips. He can't resist any longer.

Howzer tilts his head and closes the gap between you.

It's slow, tentative, and he's terrified. But when you melt into him, and your lips part against his, all of his fears and doubts are forgotten.

You're real. You're here, with him.

Your hand grips his armor as you kiss him back, and the world falls away. All that matters is you, and him, and this moment.

He feels whole.

The kiss is long and lingering. It's slow, and sweet, and everything he could have ever hoped for. Your hand finds its way to the back of his neck, and your fingers play with the short hair there. His own hands roam over your waist and back, mapping out the lines of your body.

He feels you shift onto your toes, pressing against him and pulling him closer, and his heart soars. He can't imagine wanting anything more than this, than the taste of your lips on his, the feel of your body pressed against his.

When the two of you finally part, his lips are tingling, and he can't help but chase yours for another quick peck before he pulls back. You're breathless, and your cheeks are flushed, and he feels his chest swell, his hands tightening around your waist.

He never wants to let go.

"I love you," he whispers, his voice cracking. He doesn't want to ruin the moment, but he needs you to know. He needs you to hear the words, the sincerity behind them. "I think I always have."

"I love you, too," you say, and it's like the sun coming out after a storm. "I didn't realize until it was too late, but I love you. I don't think I've ever stopped."

His heart swells at the words. He can't believe his ears, can't believe he's hearing you say them. His throat is thick, and his eyes burn, and he blinks back the tears.

Howzer pulls you close, burying his face in your hair and breathing in deeply as his arms wrap around you. He holds you tightly, and you cling to him just as fiercely.

"Stay," he murmurs into your hair, the words barely audible. "Please."

He can feel the way your muscles tense. You pull back, just enough to look at him. "What?"

"Stay," he repeats, looking into your eyes. "With us. With me."

He watches you blink, the surprise evident on your face. He realizes what he's asking of you. How much of a risk it is. You could be killed or taken prisoner by the Empire, and he's asking you to put your life in the hands of the very people who tried to kill you.

But he has to try.

"Howzer, I—I can't. It's too dangerous. If I'm caught—"

"I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." He reaches up and cradles your face in his hand, brushing his thumb across your cheek. "Please. I've lost you once. I can't lose you again."

Your eyes search his, and he can see the doubt, the fear. He's never begged anyone for anything before, but he'll beg for you. He'll do whatever it takes.

"Please," he says, his voice cracking. "I need you."

"Howzer," you say, but he can tell you're weakening. Your eyes are watery, and your brow is furrowed.

"I can't do this without you. I can't—I don't want to do this without you."

Your shoulders drop, and your head tilts slightly into his touch. You cover his hand with yours, squeezing gently. You sigh, and his heart sinks. He’s prepared to hear a no. To lose you once more, only this time, willingly. He watches as you take a deep breath, steadying yourself.

"Okay," you say softly.

He's speechless. For a moment, the word doesn't register. He's too afraid to hope.

"Okay?"

You nod. "I'll stay. If you'll have me."

He can't help the broad grin that spreads across his face, and he pulls you close, his arms wrapping around you and lifting you off the ground. You squeak, but you laugh, and the sound fills him with joy. He spins, hugging you tight as you giggle into his neck.

He's elated, and he can't hold back the laugh that bubbles up from his chest. He feels light, like a weight has been lifted from his shoulders. As soon as your feet touch the ground he's kissing you again, cupping your face and tasting the smile on your lips.

He loves you. You love him. You're staying.

The thought is so incredible, so wonderful, that he can't stop kissing you, and you don't seem to mind. He pours all his emotions, all his love, into each brush of his lips, hoping that you can feel everything he's feeling, hoping that you understand how much this means to him.

He thinks you must.

Your arms wrap around his shoulders, pulling him close. His hands drift down to your waist, and his thumbs brush against the skin where your tunic has ridden up. He kisses you deeper, and the moan that escapes your lips sends a bolt of heat straight through him.

His heart is pounding, and he can't get enough of you. His tongue brushes against your bottom lip, and you part your lips for him, letting him taste you. The kiss grows deeper, hungrier, and his grip on you tightens, drawing you flush against him.

One of your hands moves to his chest, the other threading through his hair. Your touch sets him on fire, and he can feel himself straining against the confines of his armor. He doesn't know how far this is going, but he can't stop, can't bring himself to pull away.

Not when your teeth sink into his lower lip, or your nails scrape against his scalp. Not when you arch into him, your soft chest pressing into his chestplate. Not when his hands explore your body, mapping out every curve and dip, every muscle and bone.

His tongue brushes against yours, and he moans. He wants more, so much more. He's lost in you, and he doesn't want to find his way back.

"Tell me to stop," he says, his voice rough. His lips move to your jaw, and he trails kisses down your neck, the taste of you intoxicating.

The room spins, and Howzer finds himself pressed against the wall, the cold duracrete sending a shiver down his spine. Your hands are gripping the edge of his chest plate, and your lips are hot and demanding. You bite his lower lip, tugging at it, and his eyes flutter shut.

"No." Your voice is husky, and the sound goes straight to his cock. "Don't stop."

His heart leaps into his throat, and his hands grip your waist, pulling you closer. "I want you."

"I'm yours."

The words are a balm on his soul, healing wounds he didn't know he had. He can't get enough, can't stop kissing you. He nearly whines when you break away from his mouth, but the disappointment is short-lived when your lips move to his neck. He gasps, the sensation of your hot mouth and wet tongue overwhelming.

Your hands trail down his body, and his fingers dig into your hips.

"I love you," he moans. His head falls back, and his eyes flutter shut. His entire body is on fire, and the sound of your lips smacking against his neck only adds fuel to the flames. "Fuck, I love you."

You hum against his skin, and he bites back a groan.

"I love you," you whisper, the words ghosting over his neck. "I need you.”

It's all he can take.

His hands reach under your ass and lift, and you wrap your legs around his waist. The kiss is sloppy and uncoordinated, and his teeth clack against yours as he spins and presses you against the wall. You grind against his codpiece, and he breaks the kiss, hissing.

"You're so kriffing beautiful," he groans, his voice ragged. "You drive me crazy."

You're panting, and your cheeks are flushed, and he feels his cock twitch at the sight.

"I missed you," you say again. "I needed you."

He doesn't want to admit how close to home those words hit.

"I'm here now." His voice is rough, and his hands are gripping your hips tightly. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Good," you say, before pulling him back into another kiss.

It's hard and messy and desperate. You're both clinging to each other like your lives depend on it, and it's almost painful, the need that's taken root inside him. He's wanted you for so long, and now that he's here, with you in his arms, he can't get enough. He can't stop.

You pull back, and his head tilts up to chase your lips. He's dizzy with lust and want, his breathing shallow.

"Howzer, can we—" Your voice is breathless, and your eyes are wild.

He nods, understanding immediately.

He kisses you hard, and he can feel your hands fumbling for the clasps on his chestplate. He doesn't want to let go, doesn't want to lose the contact between the two of you, but he does, if only to help you.

It's not long before the heavy plastoid is removed, tossed haphazardly onto the floor. You waste no time, moving on to his greaves. You're so close, your scent clouding his mind, and his skin prickles beneath the intensity of your gaze. If he wasn’t so dizzy with want, he’d be amused at how focused you are, the way your brows are furrowed and your bottom lip caught between your teeth. But he can't think straight, can barely even breathe.

The pieces fall to the floor, and the sound echoes through the quiet room. By the time his bracers are removed, he's already shaking. He can't help it. It's been so long, and the desire coursing through his veins is threatening to overwhelm him.

He pulls at the laces on your tunic, loosening them enough that he can tug the material down. He leans down, trailing kisses down the newly exposed skin. Your breath hitches, and his name is a sigh on your lips. He smiles against your collarbone, nipping lightly before he sucks a mark into the flesh.

"Kriff," you gasp, your hips jerking forward. "Howzer."

The sound of his name sends a jolt of electricity down his spine, and he moans. He pulls back to lift your tunic over your head, discarding it somewhere behind him. You're bare except for your breastband, and his eyes rake over your body, taking in the sight of you, mapping the scars and curves and dips. Most of them he's seen before, the few times you were injured during the war, but the new ones, the ones he doesn't know, they're more than he can handle.

He reaches out, tentatively running his fingers over a blaster burn on your stomach, and the skin jumps underneath his touch.

"Is this okay?" he asks.

"Yes," you say, nodding.

He runs his palm over the scar, tracing its edges. The flesh is puckered and pink, and he knows it's a wound that could have killed you. It’s one he should have been there to prevent.

"Does it hurt?" he asks, his voice barely a whisper.

You shake your head. "Not anymore."

He traces the scar, committing it to memory. There are others, some fresher, some older, and his eyes follow his fingers, touching each and every one.

When he's done, he meets your gaze. Your eyes are wide, and your lips are parted, and he feels his chest tighten. You're so beautiful. So perfect. And you're here, with him.

"Are you okay?" you ask.

"I'm fine," he says, shaking his head. "Better than fine. You?”

"Me too."

His hands move to your back, finding the clasp of your breastband and releasing it. He holds his breath as the band comes loose, and his eyes drop down to take in the sight of your bare chest. His cock twitches in his pants, and he has to stifle a groan.

"Beautiful," he murmurs, reaching out and brushing his fingers against your breast. "Absolutely perfect."

His calloused thumb scrapes against your nipple, and it hardens instantly. Your breath hitches, and he feels his pulse quicken. He wants to hear the sounds you make, wants to know what his touch does to you.

He leans down, and his lips replace his fingers. His mouth closes around your nipple, his tongue flicking against the stiff peak. You gasp, and he feels a surge of satisfaction. His free hand squeezes your other breast, rolling the nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Your body arches into him, and your breathy sighs turn into moans.

He's intoxicated by the sounds you're making, by the way your body responds to his touch. He can’t get enough, and he sucks harder, teasing your nipple with his tongue. Your hands are gripping his shoulders, and your hips are bucking into his, searching for friction.

You're so sensitive, and his head is spinning. He doesn't know how long he spends teasing and torturing you, but it's not long enough. When he finally releases your breast with a pop, you're panting, and your skin is flushed.

“Armor off,” you growl, and he chuckles.

"Yes, sir," he says, unable to hide the amusement in his voice. He reaches down and tugs at his boot, and you slide down the wall. The look in your eyes makes him shiver.

"I'm not your General anymore."

"No, but I'm still your loyal soldier," he says. It’s meant to be a joke, but it comes out more serious than he intended.

You smirk, and the expression sends a jolt of heat straight to his cock.

"Then get to it, soldier."

He raises an eyebrow, and if he wasn’t so turned on, he might be embarrassed by how fast he rips off his remaining armor, his fingers fumbling at the clasps. When he's finished, you're grinning, and his heart skips a beat. He whips the top half of his blacks off, tossing it onto the floor, and before he can register what's happening, you've wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a deep, passionate kiss.

The feeling of your bare chest against his sends a bolt of heat through him, and his hands find their way back to your waist, pulling you closer. You moan into his mouth, and his cock throbs.

He's so distracted by the feeling of your lips and tongue and hands that he barely registers the tugging on his waistband. Not until his blacks are sliding down his hips, exposing his hard length to the cool air of the room.

"Kriff," he hisses, breaking the kiss. "You're gonna be the death of me."

"Hopefully not," you murmur, nipping his lower lip.

"Well, you're sure making it hard."

You look down, and your lips curl into a wicked grin. He feels his cock twitch, and a drop of precome beads at the tip.

"Hard?" you ask innocently.

He groans, leaning his head against yours. "You're awful."

"I know." You reach down and take his cock in your hand, stroking it gently. He can't help but moan. "But I think you like it."

"Kriff," he curses, biting back another groan. "I love it."

He closes his eyes, and your thumb brushes over the head, spreading the slickness around. His breath hitches, and he can feel the pleasure coiling low in his belly. You're so good at this, and he's already so close, and when you sink to your knees and look up at him through those long lashes, his brain short-circuits.

You grip his cock firmly, and he sucks in a sharp breath, bracing his forearm against the wall. You lean in, and your lips brush against his stomach, kissing the soft skin just below his navel. He trembles.

"Relax," you whisper, pressing another kiss to his abdomen.

“Fuck," he groans. "Don't tell me to relax."

He's so wound up, so on edge, his whole body is tingling. Your tongue darts out, and you lick a hot stripe up his cock, and his hips buck involuntarily. You smile, and his eyes flutter shut, his chest heaving.

Your mouth is warm and wet, and you wrap your lips around the head, swirling your tongue over the slit. His eyes squeeze shut, and his breathing grows ragged.

You begin to bob your head, slowly taking him deeper and deeper with each pass. When he hits the back of your throat, you hum, and his knees nearly give out.

"Fucking hell," Howzer moans, his voice cracking. His head falls forward, and his forehead rests against his forearm. His eyes are closed, and his mouth is open, and he's trying desperately to hold back the embarrassing sounds that threaten to escape.

You pull back, and the cold air against his saliva-slick cock makes him shiver. Your hand is still working him, pumping his shaft, and his balls tighten. He can feel his orgasm building, his whole body tensing, and it's too soon, much too soon, and he needs to slow down.

"Stop, stop, stop," he chants, pulling away from you. He's so close, so painfully close, and he can't stand the thought of finishing before he even gets inside you.

You pull away, looking up at him with confusion. "Why?"

"Because if you don't, I'm going to come," he manages, his voice hoarse.

You smile wickedly. "Is that so?"

"Yes."

"And what if I want you to?" You hum, your fingers teasing the tip of his cock. It’s the lightest touch, but it makes him jump. He closes his eyes, trying to compose himself. He's never been this close to losing control so fast, and he doesn't want to embarrass himself.

"Please," he begs, his voice a choked whisper. "Not like this. Not yet."

The teasing expression on your face melts into something softer, and you rise to your feet, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him. He tastes himself on your tongue, and it only turns him on more.

"Alright," you murmur against his lips, your breath hot. "How do you want me?"

He feels the question like a punch to the gut, and his mouth goes dry. "I—um—"

"Howzer," you say softly, nipping his bottom lip. "Don't make me order you."

His eyes fly open, and his cock twitches. The image of you ordering him around, telling him what to do, how to fuck you—

"Howzer."

He's so fucked.

"Bed," he says, his voice a low growl. "Now."

The corner of your mouth quirks, and you raise an eyebrow. "That's not an answer."

He swallows and reaches down, trailing his fingers along the seam of your trousers. Your eyes flutter shut, and a breathy sigh escapes your lips. He watches you, and he can see the way your chest is heaving, the flush that creeps down your neck. It gives him the confidence to continue.

"I want you to take these off," he breathes. “And I want you on your back.”

"Yes, sir," you say, a teasing smile on your lips.

His heart lurches. "Oh, now you listen to me."

"Maybe I like when you're in charge," you purr.

He can't help the groan that escapes him.

Your hands slide down his chest, and you walk away, turning your back to him as you loosen the ties to your trousers. You make a show of sliding them down your legs, bending at the waist, and he nearly chokes when your underwear slides off, too.

"Kriff," he mumbles, his eyes glued to your ass.

You straighten and toss him a coy look over your shoulder, and he's helpless, completely and utterly enraptured.

"Like what you see?"

"Always," he replies, his voice low.

He can't stop himself from reaching out, his hand running up the smooth skin of your thigh. But you dance out of his grasp, laughing.

"Not so fast," you tease.

He growls, a sound that rumbles in his chest. "Don't be a tease."

"What's the matter, Captain?" you ask, stepping towards the bed. "Getting impatient?"

Howzer lets out a laugh of disbelief. He's beyond frustrated, he's already the most desperate he's ever been. Usually he’d play along with your games, but right now, he needs you, and he can't stand the thought of waiting another minute.

"Yes," he says, his voice rough. "Now get on the fucking bed."

You raise an eyebrow, a small smile playing at the corners of your lips. "Yes, sir."

You move, and in one fluid motion, you're laying down on the bed. You spread your legs, inviting him, and he nearly passes out. You look like every fantasy he's ever had, laid out for him, waiting for him.

"Like this?"

"Yes," he groans, his voice cracking.

"Come here, then," you say, your tone seductive.

He can see how wet you are, how ready you are for him. It makes his head spin, his heart race. He wants to taste you, to bury his face between your legs. But the ache in his cock is too strong, the need to feel you overwhelming. He has to take a deep breath before he approaches, afraid his legs won't work.

"What are you waiting for?" you ask.

"Just...taking in the view,” he replies, his voice low and rough. He tries to meet your eyes, but he can't stop staring at the apex of your thighs, at your glistening pussy, begging for him.

You giggle, a sound he's never heard from you before, and he decides right then and there that it's his new favorite sound.

"So poetic," you tease.

"I can be," he retorts, trying to play along even though all his blood is currently rushing south.

"Come on," you say. "Don't make me wait any longer."

He's never been able to deny you.

Howzer steps forward, and before you can register his movements, he's kneeling on the bed between your legs, his hands gripping your thighs. He's not gentle as he pushes them further apart, baring you to him.

"Oh," you gasp.

He smirks, and his eyes rake over your body as he settles himself between your legs. He takes a moment to memorize the sight of you, your hair splayed out on the pillow, your flushed skin, the way your chest rises and falls with every breath.

"Fuck," he mutters, his voice barely a whisper. "I'm going to enjoy this."

"Please," you whimper, your hips bucking. The sound of it wakes him from his stupor, and he grips your thighs tighter, his thumbs pressing into the sensitive flesh.

"What was that?"

You bite your lip and look away, but he can see the heat in your cheeks, the way your breathing is heavy.

"I said please," you repeat, turning your gaze back to him.

His smirk widens. "I couldn't quite hear you," he teases, his fingertips grazing the outside of your folds. He can feel how wet you are, how hot, and it makes his head spin.

You whine, and your hips buck against his hand. "Please, Howzer."

The sound of his name on your lips is like music, and he can't resist any longer.

Howzer leans down and presses a hot, wet kiss to your inner thigh. You gasp, and he sucks a mark into the skin, his tongue flicking out to soothe the sting. He repeats the process on the other leg, leaving a matching mark, and your body writhes beneath him. He pulls back, admiring his handiwork.

"You look good like this," he says, his voice a low rumble.

"You're a menace," you huff.

He chuckles and runs a finger along the length of your folds, gathering the slick that's pooled there. "That's not a very nice thing to say."

"You're not being very ni—ah!" Your words turn into a gasp when he dips his head, his tongue dragging through your folds, the taste of you coating his tongue. He feels you tremble, and your hand tangles in his hair. He loves the way you grip him, and the soft sound of his name spurs him on.

Howzer moves to your clit, his tongue circling the sensitive bundle of nerves. Your hips arch off the bed, and he has to use his forearm to keep you down, his hand splayed across your stomach. He slides two fingers inside you, curling them and rubbing the spot he knows will make you moan.

He's rewarded by the sound of his name, your breathy cries filling the room. He works you hard and fast, his tongue and fingers relentless. You're soaking wet, and he can't believe how hot and tight you are around his fingers.

"I've dreamed of this," he growls, his lips brushing against your clit.

"Really?"

He nods, and the movement causes his stubble to scrape against your skin. "Mhm. Ever since we first met.”

You let out a laugh, but it quickly turns into a moan when his fingers hit the right spot. "I-is that so?"

"Yes," he says, curling his fingers and pressing hard. "All those years fighting beside you, and I could barely control myself. It was torture."

You keen, your pussy clenching around his fingers, and he can't help but chuckle.

"I used to think about all the things I'd do if I ever got the chance."

"I thought about it too," you pant.

He looks up, surprised. The motions of his hand stutter, but he regains his composure, picking up the pace and making you gasp. "You did?"

You nod, and he watches your face, your eyes closed, your brows furrowed.

"What did you think about?"

"This," you breathe. "How you'd feel, how you'd taste, how you'd make me come."

The admission sends a jolt through him, and he moans against your clit, the vibrations making you writhe. He doubles his efforts, and his tongue draws patterns across your sensitive flesh. Your thighs tense around his head, and he feels the way you tighten around his fingers.

"I thought about you fucking me," you continue, and his eyes flutter shut. "About you filling me up and making me scream."

He can't help the noise he makes, a low, desperate groan. His cock throbs, aching for relief, and he knows he can't wait much longer. He needs you to come, needs to feel you come undone beneath him.

He can feel you getting closer, the way your breathing gets shallower, the way your muscles begin to tense. You're panting his name, and your hips are rolling, and he can tell you're close, so close.

“I’ll do whatever you want, sweetheart," he growls, the words muffled against your skin. "Just let go. Come for me."

The pet name seems to do the trick, and a string of curses spills from your lips as your body convulses, your cunt clenching and spasming around his fingers. Your hands grip his hair, tugging painfully at the roots, and he can't find it in himself to care. He keeps pumping, drawing out your orgasm until you're writhing, begging for mercy.

When you're finally spent, he pulls back, resting his cheek on your inner thigh. He can't stop looking at you, can't stop drinking in the sight of you, flushed and satisfied. You're the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, and his chest feels so full, so complete.

"Well?" he asks.

"What?"

"Was it everything you imagined?"

Your face breaks into a smile, and you shake your head, laughing. "It was better."

"Good," he says, kissing the inside of your thigh. He slowly withdraws his fingers, and his lips find your clit again, sucking gently and licking up the fresh wave of slick.

You moan, and your hands fall from his hair to the sheets, clutching at them. He can't get enough, can't stop tasting you. He could spend hours between your thighs, and it wouldn't be enough.

"Howzer," you sigh.

"You taste good," he mumbles, not bothering to pull his lips away from your cunt.

"Come here," you plead. "I want you."

"I am here."

"No," you laugh. "I want you inside me."

"Is that an order?" he asks, teasingly.

"It is," you reply.

"Then I better follow it."

Howzer is on top of you in an instant, his lips finding yours. You moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue, and he groans, his hips bucking against yours. His cock is pressed against your slit, and you're so wet, and it would be so easy to slip inside. He can't stand the thought of waiting any longer.

He reaches between your bodies, and you feel him lining up, the blunt head of his cock teasing your entrance. He pulls back, breaking the kiss and resting his forehead against yours.

"Ready?" he asks.

"Always."

The word fills his heart with warmth, and he can't stop the smile that spreads across his face.

He's still smiling when he pushes inside, and his grin only grows wider at the feeling of your tight, wet heat around him. He has to fight the urge to come right then and there, and his hands grip your hips hard enough to bruise.

"Kriff," he gasps.

"Don't stop," you pant, your eyes screwed shut.

"Wouldn't dream of it."

He thrusts in deeper, sinking another inch, and the noise that escapes your lips is the hottest thing he's ever heard. He does it again, and again, and before he knows it, he's fully sheathed inside you, his cock stretching you open, his hips flush against yours.

"Sweetheart," he breathes, the nickname coming out almost unbidden. "You feel so good."

Your hands are wrapped around his neck, and your eyes are screwed shut. Your brow is furrowed, and your mouth is hanging open, and he can't tear his eyes away.

"I—" he starts, but the words die in his throat. He can't find the right ones, can't articulate the depth of his feelings for you. So instead, he presses a soft kiss to your forehead, and then another, to the tip of your nose.

You look up at him, and the expression in your eyes is so tender, so full of affection, that his heart skips a beat.

"I love you," he whispers, the words escaping him without thought.

"I love you, too."

His heart soars, and he can't help but lean down and kiss you, his lips crashing into yours. It's a messy, passionate kiss, full of heat and need and love. You cling to him, and he loses himself in the feeling of you, of your arms and legs and mouth. He sets a slow pace, his hips moving in shallow, lazy thrusts.

You break the kiss, gasping for air, and he takes the opportunity to hooks his hands underneath your knees, bringing them up and bending you in half.

"What—" you start, but your question is cut off by a moan as he thrusts deeper, the angle changing and his cock hitting that sweet spot inside you.

"Oh," you gasp.

"You like that?"

You nod, your eyes closing, and he grins. His movements are languid, and you're so wet, and it's the best thing he's ever felt, the feeling of your tight cunt wrapped around his cock.

"So do I," he says, leaning forward to press a kiss to the side of your knee. "Feels so good, sweetheart. So kriffing good."

"Howzer," you murmur, the word a sigh.

He hums in response, and the feeling of it vibrates through his chest, his mouth still pressed against your knee. You shiver.

"You feel amazing," he says, his voice low and husky. "I can't believe how good you feel."

"Howzer," you groan, your hips bucking, the movement causing him to slide in even deeper on each thrust. "Harder."

"You want me to fuck you harder?"

"Please," you beg, your voice a whine.

"Fuck," he swears. "Yes, sir."

He pulls back and sets a new, punishing pace. He can't stop the noises that escape him, and his balls slap against your ass as he fucks you, the sound obscene. He's so close, but he needs you to come again, needs to feel you squeeze his cock, hear his name fall from your lips as you climax.

"Look at me," he orders.

You do, and the sight of your eyes, wild and dark with desire, is almost enough to push him over the edge. But he holds back, determined to make you come.

He wedges a hand between your thighs, his thumb finding your clit and rubbing tight circles. Your breath catches, and your cunt clenches around him, the rhythmic tightening sending him spiraling closer to the edge.

"Come for me," he groans, and he can't believe he's begging, but he is, and he doesn't care. "Please, sweetheart, come for me."

The pressure of his fingers and the sound of his voice are enough, and you shudder, crying out his name as your cunt spasms around him.

It's too much. He's been on edge for so long, and it's impossible to resist any longer. Before he can stop himself, he's coming, his hips stuttering as he spills inside you, his cock pulsing as his balls empty themselves, coating your walls. He can feel his release dripping out, leaking down his shaft, and the thought of it is so filthy, so hot, that he nearly blacks out.

"Fuck," he gasps, his head falling forward. He's shaking, his body wracked with the force of his release. It feels like every single nerve in his body is on fire, and his vision is blurred, and the only thing keeping him tethered to reality is the feeling of your hands in his hair, gently massaging his scalp.

When his body finally stops trembling, he opens his eyes, and you're looking up at him, a smile playing on your lips.

"Hi," you say softly.

"Hey," he replies, his voice hoarse. He looks down and sees the mess between your thighs, his cock and your folds coated in his release. He groans. "Sorry, I—I should have asked if you were okay with that."

"It's fine," you reassure him, your hand stroking his hair. "It was good. Really good."

"I'll pull out," he mumbles, leaning down and kissing you.

"Wait," you say, and the sound is muffled against his lips. "Not yet."

"Okay," he whispers, pulling back.

"I just want to feel you for a little longer."

The words make his heart ache, and he leans down to capture your lips in another kiss, softer this time. Your legs fall from his shoulders, and they wrap around his waist, keeping him close.

"How's that?" he asks, his voice barely a whisper.

"Perfect," you murmur, running your hands down his back.

He presses his forehead against yours, and he closes his eyes, focusing on the feeling of you. The two of you stay like that for a few moments, neither of you wanting to move.

Finally, he pulls away, and the soft, disappointed noise you make sends a jolt through him.

"It's alright, sweetheart," he soothes. "Just trying to find something to clean us up."

You groan and bury your face in the pillow, and the sight is so endearing, he can't help but lean down and kiss the corner of your mouth.

"I'll be right back," he says, reluctantly untangling himself from your limbs.

"Fine," you huff, and the pout on your lips is adorable.

He climbs off the bed and walks to the 'fresher, and when he returns, you're propped up on one elbow, watching him. Your gaze is focused on his softening cock, and his cheeks heat up.

"Like what you see?" he asks, echoing your words from earlier.

You raise an eyebrow and smirk. "Always."

The blush deepens, and he clears his throat. He makes his way back to the bed, and he cleans up the mess that's leaking out of you, wiping up his spend. When he's finished cleaning both of you, he tosses the cloth to the floor and climbs into the bed, pulling the blankets up and tucking the two of you in.

"That's better," you sigh, curling up next to him.

Howzer wraps his arm around your shoulder, and you nestle into the crook of his arm. He rests his cheek on the top of your head, and the two of you lie in silence, enjoying each other's presence.

"I love you," you say softly, after a few minutes.

"I love you, too."

Your hand rests on his chest, and your fingers trace the planes of his muscles. He shivers, and he can't suppress the grin that spreads across his face. He feels like his heart might burst.

"So," you say, after a while. "How long have you been holding onto that?"

He snorts, and his arm tightens around you. "How long ago was that day on Kamino?"

"What?" you ask, surprise evident in your voice. You sit up and look at him, and he's pleased to see the blush that stains your cheeks. "You're kidding."

He shakes his head, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. "Nope. That's when I knew."

"Howzer!"

"What?"

"That was...that was ages ago," you stammer, and the way you can't seem to get your words out makes him chuckle.

"Yeah, well," he shrugs. "What can I say? I'm a romantic."

"Well, I'm sorry it took me so long," you murmur, laying your head back on his chest.

"It's alright," he says, his hand finding yours and lacing his fingers through yours. "You're worth the wait."

"So are you."

He closes his eyes and presses a kiss to the top of your head. He can feel his eyelids getting heavy, and the weight of your body is comforting. The steady rhythm of your breathing is soothing, and before long, his consciousness begins to slip away.

The last thing he hears is the sound of your voice, sleepy and content.

"I love you, Howzer."

"I love you, too, sweetheart."

He drifts off to sleep, and the last thing he feels is the press of your lips against his chest, just above his heart.

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#captain howzer #captain howzer x reader #the clone wars #the bad batch #tbb howzer #captain howzer x you #clone smut #clone trooper howzer #clone x reader #howzer x reader #bad batch howzer #roy writes #*closes eyes and hits post*

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zinzinina · 3 years

Text

Gravity

Pairing: Captain Howzer x F!Reader Length: 6.8k Rating: Explicit 18+ CW: Vaginal fingering, PIV, forbidden relationship (nothing taboo, only socially derided).

A/N: Hi, yes, I know. This one is a bit of a mess, so please forgive anything I’ve missed in the editing. I just have a lot of feelings about our new teal friend, and one of those is a Bad Feeling about what might happen in the next episode, so please be advised there’s a tinge of angst in here too. x

The balmy heat of the day weighs your already-heavy dress down further, until you feel you could nearly sink into the floor. Senatorial aides may not dress quite as elaborately as the representatives themselves, but the dresses you’ve brought with you from the Core are still decidedly more dense than strictly necessary. Particularly on Ryloth, where the locals favour lighter fabrics. You’re beginning to understand why.

Beside you, Captain Howzer shifts on his feet. The two of you have been spending more and more time together over the past several months, as military briefings gave way to fraught peace talks between freshly-minted Imperial delegates. Navigating the flurry of sudden changes has made the Senator terse and closed-off; quite literally, as the shut doors in front of you can attest. Assistants, meanwhile, are left to stand and wait. Luckily for you, the Captain has proven to be far from disagreeable company.

He shifts again, and you turn your head infinitesimally to glance over at him, your lips moving just slightly. “This is taking a lot longer than it should.”

He nods, frowning. You both know Taa has never been one to linger in meetings. It cuts into the time he could be spending at leisure. For him to be shut in with this new Vice Admiral for hours on end can only mean trouble. Unease settles across your shoulders, and you realise you’re clenching your fists with nervous tension.

Howzer leans in, murmuring close to your ear. “Don’t look so worried, ma’am. Vice Admiral Rampart spent just as long with General Syndulla yesterday. If it were that bad, they wouldn’t’ve both come out looking as calm as they did.”

You relax slightly, recognising the truth in his words. “If it were that bad, Cham wouldn’t have let him talk for longer than a minute.”

He presses his lips together, failing to completely disguise the little smile there, and you smother your own nervous giggle with a beringed hand. You aren’t sure why you still feel so edgy. The war is over; if everything goes well, you could be back in the Core within another cycle. You’d never thought your studies in Ryl would end up with you serving under a Twi’lek senator, and you’d found it difficult to adjust to being so far out, among people so different from your own. Now, though… the thought of going home is almost enough to drive you into a full panic.

Not just because of the uncertainty of what you’ll find there, but something else, too. Something that’s made you feel tied inextricably to Ryloth, despite the heat and the mistrust of the locals to any outsiders. Something you’ve been trying very hard not to think about directly. As though he can sense the direction of your thoughts, Howzer clears his throat, readjusting the grip on the helmet under his arm. “Have you heard anything from your family?”

You glance up in surprise. He’d offered to help you several weeks ago when your personal comm channel device had failed to return a signal from the Core. Though it probably wasn’t officially sanctioned use of military resources, he hadn’t hesitated in permitting you the use of the longer-range commlink kept with his field gear when he’d heard about the trouble you were having. It had struck you as particularly kind that he’d sensed how much it meant to you. And even more so that he remembered enough to ask now.

“No,” you say. “Nothing. I expect the situation at home is overwhelming, with everything changing so quickly. But I’d hoped to hear something. Just so I know they’re safe. I suppose that sounds silly, when there are so many bigger things to worry about. Maybe they’ve just forgotten about me.”

He shakes his head. “Not at all. I lost contact with a few of my brothers at the end of the war. I understand how you must be feeling. But Ryloth’s isolated. News reaches us a lot slower out here. And… I don’t see how it’s possible for anybody to forget about you, ma’am.”

His tone is reassuring, steady. Not for the first time, you’re almost overwhelmed with the feeling of solidity he seems to carry. As though no matter what happens next, he’ll see it through unshaken. It makes you want to lean even closer, into the safety of his orbit. You realise you’ve been looking openly into those dark eyes for just a moment longer than entirely necessary, and your lips part in preparation for some kind of inane, distracting comment. But he doesn’t make any move to break the contact, gazing steadily back at you with some unspoken question just beneath the surface.

Your pulse spikes. You are no longer sure whether it’s because of the temperature of the day, but you could swear your face is practically glowing with the warmth you feel, a light sheen of moisture dancing across your forehead. Standing so close, you can see the fine lines etched around his eyes from the sun. They make him look like he’s always on the verge of smiling, despite the sombreness of his expression. The places where his full eyebrows have begun to lighten with age. The separate pigments of the blues and greens mixed in the scuffed paint on his pauldron.

There’s a low blip from the panel beside you, and the Vice Admiral steps out, an uneasy-looking Senator Taa two steps behind him. You spring backward, the beading around your heavy sleeves clicking lightly with the movement, but neither of the men appear to notice. “I look forward to seeing you in the morning, Senator,” Rampart is saying, an edge of irony in his tone. Taa doesn’t answer, but you can tell from the quiver in his jowls that he does not share the Vice Admiral’s confidence. Barely looking at you, the Senator thrusts a datastick in your general direction.

“This is the briefing for tomorrow’s address. I’m going to retire early,” he says, already trying to squeeze his considerable bulk past you toward the corridor leading outside. His hands stroke repeatedly at his lekku; a nervous gesture you’ve come to recognise. “See yourself home.”

You gape at the small silver shape in your hand. “But, sir—“

“You’re dismissed, girl,” he tosses back, disappearing around the bend into the fading light of the afternoon. You raise your eyes to where Howzer is still standing, frowning at you. He looks as confused as you feel, and you’re about to say something about the strangeness of this development when you realise you aren’t alone. You’d been so distracted by Taa’s obvious agitation that you hadn’t immediately registered the fact that the Vice Admiral still stands in the foyer outside the Senator’s office, watching you with a patient smile.

He’s not an unpleasant-looking man; high cheekbones, a pronounced chin, and some residual, boyish softness in his face despite the greys flecking his brown hair. But something about him makes you shrink back, your skin prickling. His smile widens.

“You must be the aide designated from the Senatorial committee. Tell me, how do you find Ryloth?”

Your voice sounds small, but you raise your chin as best as you can manage. “It’s beautiful here. I feel very fortunate to have spent so much time abroad, when so often aides are relegated to desk work.”

“Indeed. Your Ryl must be exceptional, to have warranted this posting.”

You narrow your eyes slightly. His tone is warm, but you’re sure you don’t imagine the slight condescension underneath it. “The dialect is only a small part of successful communication, Vice Admiral. It’s far more important, I’ve found, to garner a meaningful relationship with the Twi’lek people themselves.”

His smile doesn’t reach his eyes. “Fascinating. There are many new Imperial delegates looking to reestablish this type of… productive relationship among the outlying systems. I look forward to seeing where your career takes you.”

Your answering nod is slightly stiff. You have no intention whatsoever of leaving your current position. Taa may be as corrupt as politicians come, but you don’t serve him. You serve the position he fills, and in the time you’ve spent here, you truly believe you have made legitimate change in only the small, unnoticed ways an aide can. Maybe even more than you’d have been able to manage with a more attentive boss looking over your shoulder.

But Rampart doesn’t need to know that. Considering you for a moment longer, he tilts his head to the side before speaking again. “But please, my manners. You must be eager to get home. Allow me to have the commando here escort you.”

You hadn’t even noticed the thin, black-armoured figure leaning in the shadows against the door. The trooper’s narrow, cruel-looking face appraises you coolly, thin lips pinched around a toothpick. The repulsed shudder that fingers its way across your skin is strong enough to make you blanch. If Rampart’s demeanour had made you uneasy, this man’s presence alone is almost enough to drive you into a full panic, and you inch backward.

Right into Howzer’s plastoid-armoured chest. The man behind you takes a step closer to you, drawing himself up to his full height. There’s a protective edge in the way his arm raises slightly, though he keeps his voice easy. “I’ve already agreed to see the lady home safely, sir. I’ll be returning to base afterwards, anyway.”

If the Vice Admiral notices the way Howzer’s hand hovers inches from your waist, he doesn’t say anything. “Very good, Captain. See to it your men are well prepared for tomorrow’s address. We do not wish to see any disturbances. It would, after all, reflect poorly on both of us.” He nods shortly to the black-armoured trooper and turns to leave.

Your fingers itch, curled around the datastick. You’re desperate to find a terminal and see what the notes contain, but you force yourself to wait. Better to read it in the privacy of your rooms, just in case. You still haven’t been able to dislodge the sense of impending trouble, and your encounter with Rampart has only made you more jumpy than before.

Your thoughts are disturbed by a low electronic chirp from behind you, and you turn back to see Howzer staring down at an alert on his wrist display. He offers you a wry look.

“Whatever’s on that thing he gave you, I’d say I just got my own copy. You must’ve been right. If they’re expecting trouble… well, maybe it’s just a precaution.”

You feel shaky. “I wish I were as optimistic as you, Captain.”

He looks like he wants to say more, but he doesn’t. You could kick yourself. This man has watched countless friends die, probably coming inches from death himself. The tangle of scars on his face are proof enough of his bravery. And what did the war mean for you? Long, arduous hours poring over legislative contracts and drafted reports, yes, but inside the comfort and safety of an office. You can smell traces of perfume from your pulse points, faded from the day but still floral and sweet. It’s a reminder that your own difficulties are minuscule compared to the ones he faces.

“Let’s get you home, ma’am.”

Forcing yourself to smile, you place your hand into the crook of his elbow. “Lead the way.”

Lessu’s streets slope gently upwards. It’s misleading; from a distance the laneways appear almost flat, but from the base of the city to the top, it’s quite a climb. Howzer keeps his helmet off, carrying it tucked underneath an arm. You’d been surprised by this casual habit when you first met him. The red-marked troopers from the Core were almost never seen without their helmets; facelessly intimidating, almost like droids. But the man beside you looks at ease and entirely personable.

You pass two older women walking close together, their lekku patterned in lines and circles. They eye you both with mistrust and you lower your gaze. The Twi’lek people have long memories, and the sight of two outsiders is understandably cause for some unease.

But Howzer straightens slightly as you approach, his expression open. “Kassurra,” he murmurs, nodding. His drawl is heavily accented, and his pronunciation makes you wince, but the women return the nod all the same before continuing past.

By the time you reach the arched doors of your lodging, you’re far too warm again. Howzer has been an almost-silent presence beside you, only the quiet thud of his boots and the sturdiness of his arm keeping you anchored to him.

The gradual climb has left your calves aching, and you can think of nothing you want more than to throw off your layers of clothing and wash away the humidity of the day. But instead you pause in the sheltered overhang at the door, unwilling to remove your hand from the Captain’s arm.

That same, strange sense warning you of impending trouble is now pulling you closer to the man in front of you. It’s telling you not to let him leave; that if you let him out of your sight, you may not ever see him again. It would be easy to dismiss it as more nerves from the ramping complexity of the diplomatic situation unfolding… but you choose not to ignore it. Instead, you smile as brightly as you can.

“Another long night for you, Captain?”

He scratches at the shorn-close side of his head, looking weary. “Sounds like it. We’ll need to make sure to have good coverage over whatever it is that’s happening tomorrow. And the refinery is still a priority for patrols. I’ll be briefing the boys once I’ve had a good look at these notes.”

Strangely, your fear makes you bold, and you nod. “Then let me make you a cup of caf before you go. You’ll need it.”

To his credit, he doesn’t betray any shock at your suggestion. “Ma’am?”

“We’re… friends, aren’t we? Isn’t this okay? I… don’t want to be alone just yet.”

The line between his brows is slightly more pronounced, and for just a moment, you’re sure he’ll politely decline. Remind you how much work he has to do, or make a self-deprecating excuse about his filthy boots on your carpeted floors. It’s one thing to sit together between lengthy meetings, killing time with tidbits of personal information or trying to make the other laugh with silly faces behind the backs of Taa and his associates. Another entirely to be alone together, in the naked glow of the evening. It would be improper for him to accept. It had been improper for you to ask.

But then he glances at his chrono.

“I have a couple of hours before I’m due back. That’d be… nice. Thank you.”

Offering him a shy smile, you press your palm to the access panel and step inside, waiting for him to follow.

Your lodgings are cool and shadowy, the last remnants of the evening light tinting the outline of the furniture red. Smooth, curved grey stone marks out the walls, as with most dwellings carved into the cliff side here. You shrug off the heavy outer layer of your dress, draping it over the back of a carved bench. You’d done your best to make the rooms feel like home in the time you’ve been here, and you watch from your periphery as he steps tentatively inside, glancing around. There’s something peculiarly exposing about having him in your space like this. As though there is something secretly revealing about you hidden in the little jar of flowers on the table top, or the stack of flimsi scattered across the bench.

You activate the burner, and the low burble of heating water underscores the sound of him drawing back one of your chairs, easing himself down. He leaves his helmet on the floor beside the table, looking unsure. You quirk an eyebrow. “You can put that on the table, you know. Make yourself comfortable.”

He grins back at you. “This thing’s due for a deep clean. Don’t want to get any, uh… marks on your table.”

You half-laugh, spooning caf into two mugs. “That’s fair. Which reminds me: I always wondered how you kept your hair looking so good under there.” You’d intended it to come across as teasing, a soft joke about his preening to break the slightly stiff air between you. But as soon as it comes out, you want to snatch it back. You sounded just slightly too breathy; not anywhere near nonchalant enough.

Fortunately he doesn’t seem to have noticed. His returning laugh is good-natured. “Few’ve the boys have got tricks like that up our sleeves. Not much else to do with your rec leave when you’re stationed in the Outer Rim.” Looking vaguely embarrassed, he runs a hand back through the aforementioned hair, leaning back in the chair and watching you pour in the water. It feels… nice. Just having him here, hearing his voice in such a mundane setting. You could almost close your eyes and pretend he’s always been here. And then you catch yourself. Get a grip, you think sternly. This little schoolgirl crush on the handsome soldier is beyond ridiculous.

Returning to the table with both mugs in hand, you sit across from him. The datastick sits directly between you, and you realise you’re both looking at it edgily, like it could crack open and birth a swarm of gutkurrs at any moment. And then you huff with decidedly undignified impatience.

“Let’s get it over with, shall we? We’ll both be reviewing the same report later tonight; might as well do it now.”

Without waiting for his answer, you reach up for your datapad, sliding it onto the table between you and twisting the stick into the side. The projected string of Aurebesh is shorter than you’d expected, and more blunt. You don’t take it in the first time, needing to read it again. And then you understand. You hear your own little hiss of disbelief as you read through it for a third time, your mind struggling to catch up. “Complete demilitarisation? They’ll never agree to this. When Cham hears— he’ll be furious, this is—“

Unable to contain your incredulity, you stand up and stalk across the room, chewing on your lip.

Behind you, Howzer flicks up the display from his wrist comm, and a similar string of data springs up. He scrolls through it quickly, scanning his narrowed eyes through the glowing readouts.

“He’s already agreed to be present at the address tomorrow. I don’t know how they got him to lend his support to this, but it’s a promising sign. His followers won’t want to make a move against him.” His deep drawl still sounds calm, despite your own sense of growing distress.

You pace back across the room, your skirts whispering against the floor.

“Maybe not immediately. But the slightest trouble with this refinery is all it’ll take to set the unrest off again. The people are already mistrustful of the new administration. And then, and then…” Your head spins. This fragile, hard-won peace Ryloth had waited so long to see, on the edge of shattering all over again. Something is coming unstuck in your chest. “I feel like… something terrible is about to happen.”

You’re desperate to rush back out to the office. It might not be too late to draft an appeal. Taa may have rolled over immediately, but you’ve figured out a few ways to push back in the time you’ve worked under him. At least to buy some breathing space, until you can contact other representatives with more pull. Someone can stop this, or figure out a way to prevent shattering the delicate balance barely holding out between the locals and the new administration. You’re turning to pace back the way you came when arms catch yours, gently halting you, turning you to face him.

“Cham agreed to this. He wouldn’t have done that if he didn’t know it would be alright.” His reasoning makes sense. Logically, you know it does. But there’s still that feeling. Ever since you were young, you’ve just… known things like this, sometimes. Like watching dark clouds rolling in on the horizon, without being able to warn anybody else. And right now it all seems to be dragging you toward him, powerful enough to hurt. You don’t know how to explain it to him, but you want him to leave Ryloth while he still can. You’re trembling, and he lowers his hold from your shoulders, down to your hands before releasing them.

Slowly, as though giving you the chance to pull away if you wish, he gently cups your chin, tilting it up to face him. “It’s… going to be okay.”

Blinking hard, you try to keep your voice steady as your eyes meet his; those kind, tired lines around his eyes faintly pronounced in concern. “How do you know that?”

“I don’t. I think I probably know a lot less than you do, to be honest. But… whatever happens, you’ll be safe. I can promise you that, at least.” He utters it like a vow.

Your eyes sting. It’s not yourself you’re scared for. It’s the people you’ve come to know and care for in your time here. It’s the family left behind in a home you suspect you won’t even recognise when you next see it. And it’s him. Steadfast, grounding. Always so calm, infuriatingly so, even when faced with violence and fear. Right now, you feel like he’s the only thing keeping you down. A ballast against the commingled currents of awful premonition and clawing uncertainty shifting around your feet, loose sand dragged by the tide.

It must all be written clear across your face, because he takes you in for one beat, and another, his gentle, dark gaze inscrutable. And then his lips are on yours, harder and hotter than you’d expected from a man so collected. Your breath escapes in a rush against him, hands coming up to clutch helplessly against his chestplate. Your heart kicks immediately into a gallop, his own hands coming up to cradle the back of your head. His touch is far lighter than his kiss, almost reverential, like you’re a precious thing in his hands.

You can’t remember what to do with yourself. In all your silly, foundless daydreams of him taking you in his arms, you’d never come close to the real thing. Now, you feel floppy and stiff all at once, heat liquefying your bones into uselessness. He sucks your bottom lip into his mouth, a graveled exhale vibrating from him straight into you, through you, throbbing keen between your thighs. You arch up into his kiss, and he drags his hands down your neck, catching on the chain of your heavy necklace.

He walks you backwards, crowding you against the wall. While you can tell he’s roped with the wiry muscles only a years-hardened soldier can carry, the teal-accented armour makes him appear broader; more solid, impenetrable somehow.

“We shouldn’t do this,” he groans against your throat, lips hot over your pulse. You can feel the gentle abrading scrape of his chin against your skin; the scarred patch where the hair doesn’t grow left smooth. Your head tips back, the ornate clasp of your gown digging into the base of your skull against the wall.

“No,” you agree, fumbling breathlessly with his armour. You can’t figure out how it works; how to get it off him. But you want to feel him against you; not the plastoid, or the body glove underneath. You want to feel his skin against yours, but there are far too many layers between you, the elliptical embroidery at your sleeves vineline and constricting.

“Tell me to stop.” Even as he says it, he bundles the heavy fabric of your skirts up around your waist in one fist, reaching down to help you unlatch his codpiece with the other.

“Please don’t stop,” you beg. Gloved fingers grip your thigh, hitching it up around his waist. There’s a hollow thud somewhere below your feet, and then he’s grinding himself against your core, breathing uneven. You can feel the hardness through his body glove, and he breathes something that can only be a curse, low and musical in a language you don’t recognise.

You let out a pitiful, pained whimper as his hardness grinds devastating into your core against the wall, the scratched, uneven shears in his battle-scarred armour catching against the expensive fabric of your bodice. This is inappropriate, wildly so; if anyone in the Senator’s office found out, you’d lose your position, but you don’t care.

“This isn’t…” he interrupts himself, bending his head and sucking messily at your cleavage. “I should… bedroom.”

“Through there,” you gasp, and he’s kissing you again, both hands up under your skirts in a tangle. You nearly fall backward through the bedroom doorway, your bed draped across with another gown, a simple silver headdress you’d considered and decided against wearing, more sheets of flimsi. He sweeps it all aside in a smooth gesture, dropping you bodily onto your back in the centre of the bed.

You pant up at him, and for a moment you both seem to regain control of yourselves, stilling. Far from backing away, he leans down over you, intent with renewed focus. His hand smooths over your cheek, down to your neck. “Maker, you’re beautiful,” he murmurs. “Always have been. Since that first day you arrived here. Haven’t stopped thinking about you.”

You reach up and clutch your fingers around his neck, pulling him forward until he overbalances on top of you. Your lips are urgent, and you try to wriggle out of your dress even as you skate your fingers along the velvet-prickled sides of his head, cupping behind his ears.

“Let me… how does this work?” he mutters, pulling back and frowning at your bodice.

“In the back,” you breathe, trying to drag yourself back into a seated position. His arms crush you in something similar to an embrace, even as you feel him working clumsily at the fine hooks along the back of your dress. Impatience wars with precision, and you hear the tiny telltale bursting of seams ripped loose.

“I’m sorry,” he starts, looking pained, but you kiss him again, reaching back and finishing the job. You can fix it later. It hardly seems to matter now that he’s here in front of you. You’d rip all of your pretty dresses to ribbons, crush every pearled comb to dust under your feet if it meant he kept touching you like this.

He drags his lips down your neck, pulling aside the loosened panels of fabric until you’re bare underneath him. He sucks at the softness just above your breast, and your skin rushes into goosebumps. Kicking free from the tangle of your ruined dress, you wrap your ankles around his waist, trying to draw him down.

“Wait, cyare,” he breathes. “Let me take care of you first.” Sliding both vambraces off over his wrists, he drags his gloves off with his teeth, dropping them beside the bed and leaning down to return to you.

He closes his mouth around your breast in a slow movement, tongue tracing your nipple. You sink your teeth into your own lip to muffle the whimper that threatens to escape, as his hand skates down the side of your body, following your curves as close as waves hugging the shore. When his fingers brush up between your thighs, you’re almost positive you’ve drawn blood, and you force your jaw to relax.

You both feel the arousal-slicked ease with which his touch glides through your folds, and he releases your breast from his mouth long enough to murmur words of indistinct longing into your skin. His thumb finds your clit, circling it lightly, and your hips jerk up at the shock. Swollen with need, you’re already desperately sensitive to his touch, and a gentle swipe is enough to make your breath catch in your throat.

Without your permission, your hips cant up, seeking more of him, every single nerve ending thrilling at his movements. Obliging, he dips his middle finger into your cunt, and your muscles shock around him, clenching at his touch. “Shit,” he breathes, sounding dazed. “You’re so tight, cyare,” and he eases the digit in deeper, making you shudder around him.

He withdraws, your cunt gripping tight to follow him, and he groans — a disbelieving, almost-pained sound. He pumps into you slowly, curling at the knuckle, and you toss your head back, eyes rolling shut. It’s so good, so much better than your own fingers, his pace steady and relentless, every movement smooth. Your hands flutter down to grasp at his wrist, trying to encourage him to move faster, and he does, bracing himself up on an elbow to watch your face tighten with pleasure.

“That’s it,” he tells you, encouraging, reassuring. “More?”

You nod, unable to form words, and he eases a second finger in, stilling for a moment as though simply enjoying the feeling of you around his touch. He leans in to kiss you again, resuming the slow movements in time with his lips and tongue against your skin. When his thumb returns to brush your clit, you’re almost immediately overwhelmed. Your fingers rake through his short hair, the length at the top tangling around your grip, and he seems to understand what you’re asking for without you even forming the words.

It’s as though a switch flips, and he’s suddenly moving harder, changing the angle and dragging against that spot inside you that makes your thighs tremble. The muscles in your lower stomach convulse, and you bear down, the soles of your feet pressing helplessly into the bed to try to leverage yourself up into his fingers. He’s murmuring to you again, wordless praise, indefinable promises, impossible secrets, delivering it all into your skin even as you hold your breath, releasing it in a shudder. Every muscle below your waist seems to contract at once, and your orgasm hits hard in your brain before anywhere else, scattering every thought and rushing down through your cunt, squeezing and fluttering against his touch.

Your walls still grip at him, even with the renewed coating of your release, and he slips his fingers from you slowly, watching the way your hips lift as though to follow him. Still leaning over you, he brings his glistening fingers up to his lips, but you catch his hand in your own before he can reach, drawing his wrist instead down toward you.

You keep your eyes fixed to his as you part your lips, your tongue pressing tentatively to his fingertips. You taste the tang of yourself on the calloused edges of his fingers: a slight biting edge to the sweetness, like a tart fruit. It’s not unpleasant, and you draw his hand closer, until you’re sucking his fingers into your mouth, hollowing your cheeks as you do.

He’s staring at you like he’s never seen you before. And maybe he hasn’t, really; maybe he’s only seen the demure, buttoned-up Senatorial aide, with her elaborate gowns and fine jewellery, skin soft from lack of manual work. But as you peek up at him through your eyelashes, tongue still pressing into the space between his fingers, there’s no doubt in your mind that he sees you now. Releasing his hand, now far wetter than before, you clutch at his shoulders, using his weight to draw yourself up. He helps you, touch light around your waist as you fumble with his chest plate. The clasps aren’t at the sides, and you’re frustrated, nails scratching at the plastoid, unable to figure it out.

Your voice sounds slightly husky; rough and breathless, nothing at all like your usual gentle tone. “Take this off. Please.”

“It’s underneath,” he tells you, doing something with his hands too fast and practised for you to follow. The now-loose segments fall away, and he pulls the remaining pieces over his head, tossing them to the floor. He draws back briefly, just long enough to ease out of the sections of armour remaining on his legs, kicking out of his boots, yanking his body glove over his head from an opening in the back and rolling it down his waist until he’s completely bare, and you can see every line of muscle in his body. As you’d suspected, he’s leaner without the layers of painted plastoid; his waist narrowing to a vee from his broad chest, his powerful-looking thighs thick but long.

He waits, kneeling at the edge of the bed while you take him in, your chest rising and falling from where you lean, half-sitting up. You’re suddenly overcome with the reality of him. He’s even more beautiful than you’d thought. Like this, in your bed, quiet and patient, he isn’t just a handsome soldier in uniform to appear in your daydreams, ready to sweep you off your feet. He’s scarred, burn-shined scars thickening around his ribs and across his forearms. The steel in his hair glints in the last red fingers of sunset, his strong profile shadowed on one side, leaving his scarred cheek in darkness.

He doesn’t look… uneasy, exactly. Or, not the same unease that would come with nerves, or uncertainty. You can only imagine the string of encounters he’s had across the systems on which he’s been based, each deployment doubtlessly leaving a trail of women in his wake. But he does look careful. Calmly resolved. Like he’s waiting for you to come to your senses, to tell him to put his uniform back on, to remember his place and leave.

“Howzer,” you breathe. Something flickers across his face at the sound of his bare name from your lips, without title or rank. You let your eyes drift downward, taking in the scattering of hair across his abdomen, down to the apex of his thighs. His erection strains toward you, thick and beautiful, curving slightly upward. His brows are furrowed again, staring at you like you’re asking a trick question. The blood-red light fades from his face, the sun finally disappearing from Ryloth. It feels like an omen, and your heart squeezes in sad desperation. Nothing can happen to him, you tell yourself. He’s too solid, too steadfast. You want to ignore the feeling you have, but you can’t. So you do the only other thing you can.

“Please.” Your voice sounds small.

It’s all he needs. Leaning back over you, he kisses you again, and this feels entirely unlike the previous kisses. This is closed-mouthed, gentle and soft. Even as he does it, his hands are running smoothly down your sides. He props his hands under your waist, lifting you slightly, positioning himself between your thighs.

And then the blunt, weeping head of his cock is nudging at your entrance. He pushes forward in the smallest, more careful movements, filling you slowly, sinking inch by inch. There’s no savagery, no reaming thrust like you’d been braced for, or what you’ve experienced from other men. Instead, he eases into you like parting silk, absolutely restrained.

Your breathing matches his, each of your chests expanding against one another. Sticking with the humidity, your breasts pillow against his firm pectorals, and you pull your lips free, gasping for breath. He’s overwhelming you; the sharp smell of kit-issued soap underneath sweat, fingers sinking into the softness at your waist. Every part of him lined up with every part of you.

When he’s finally fully-seated inside you, he doesn’t move straight away, just kissing at your neck, your chest, the secret places below your earlobe and over your eyelids. Split open around him, you feel absolutely secure. If the entire planet’s gravity were to fail in this moment, you know you wouldn’t be going anywhere. Not when he’s holding you in place.

He rocks his hips back gently, barely an inch, still breathing into your skin before sinking back, and you lengthen your torso, stretching back from your bent knees. You clutch at him, trying to encourage movement, and he complies. Drawing backward, he eases back in, still smooth, but harder than before. “Is this alright?” he murmurs, voice rough, even as he draws his hips back again. You realise he’s trying to be as careful as possible with you, and you realise with a start that he thinks you’re in pain.

“I’m not a virgin,” you tell him between gasps. Your fingers press at the muscles of his thighs, trying to draw him closer.

He huffs a shaky laugh against you, sinking deeper into your aching cunt. “Didn’t say you were. Still don’t want to hurt you.”

His concern makes you almost weak with how desperately you want him, just… more and harder, longer, never-ending. “You aren’t. You couldn’t. Please. Fuck me.”

His eyebrows draw down, but he says nothing. His next thrust is harder, hard enough to make your breasts ripple upward, and you exhale through your clenched teeth. His neck arches as he stretches down to kiss the base of your neck even as he begins to fuck you in earnest, gathering speed into a steady, filling rhythm.

He shifts his weight, striking something inside you, and you gasp. “There, right there,” clutching at him. A roll of sweat creeps from your brow backward into your hair, and he chases the same spot, angling his next thrust down instead of sideways. You cry out, your face contorting in pleasure, and he braces his weight down on your hips to keep you still, precision in each of his movements.

You can feel him losing his momentum, your cunt clenching around him as white-hot pleasure melts up into your stomach, bringing you close to your edge again. He draws his lips free, smoothing his hands up to your face, urgent.

“Where… where should I…?”

“I… have… implant,” you tell him, the words cracking on the way out with the force of his thrusts. “In-inside.”

Something about this makes him groan anew, and he drops his sweaty forehead to your shoulder, loose strands of hair stuck across his face. “Come on,” he breathes, muscles tense as though he’s barely holding back. “Come for me, cyare,” and you do, eyes rolling back, your toes curling with the force of your orgasm. You’re boneless in his arms, even as he grits an oath into the side of your head, hips stuttering. His cock throbs inside you, each twitch filling you with the heat of his release, and he continues to thrust, shallow and short until he collapses against you.

His cock leaves a warm gleam on your thigh as he pulls out and rolls to the side, chest heaving beside you. Your breaths are both too loud in the now-dark room, heat swimming thick as the evening sound of insects hums in the distance. You don’t know what to say to him. You’re afraid of sounding pathetic if you beg him to stay, or return later. But you don’t want to pretend this didn’t mean anything to you. You know you wouldn’t even convince yourself if you were to try. You let your head roll limply to the side, and find him already gazing at you, steady as always.

“What does this mean?” you mouth, not putting any air behind the words. His brows furrow.

“What do you want it to?” he responds, catching your hand in his, bringing your knuckles to his lips.

“I want to know what you want.” It sounds almost petulant, but he just closes his eyes, lips moving against your hand.

“What I want… I can’t have.” There’s tiredness underneath it. You remember what he’d said earlier, about losing contact with his brothers after the war ended. Distantly, the shriek of the lylek drifts over, bringing night in. He lets go of your hand, shifting to the edge of the bed and reaching for his armour.

“I have to get back. We want to be prepared for tomorrow.”

You gather your ripped dress around you, watching as he methodically replaces his shoulder bells and pauldron, slipping his gauntlet plates back into place. Running a hand back through the longer hair at the top of his head, he glances at you.

“I… want to see you again. Away from the Senator’s office, I mean.”

You swallow. “I want that too.”

He nods, eyes creasing with softness, leaning in to press a kiss between your eyebrows. As he steps back out into the dusked living space, reaching for the helmet beside the table, you catch the shadowed outline of two cups of untouched caf.

“Howzer?”

He pauses.

“Be careful.” It is insufficient to convey the enormity of how afraid you feel, but he seems to sense it anyway. He nods again, offering you a small smile, and then he’s gone.

Tagging some pals:

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#captain howzer x f!reader #howzer x f!reader #captain howzer #star wars fanfiction #the bad batch fanfiction #zinzinina

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