#cant connect to internet
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bitchfitch · 3 months ago
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I had a shrink appointment today and while I could not see it I knew my doc was going through the five stages of grief while I explained my fool proof strategy for doing my t shots despite a crippling fear of needles: By abusing my vastly more crippling fear of being an inconvenience.
My mother and I play phasmophobia together every week. she usually has a pretty limited time to do this bc she's like. a doctor and a college professor whos always busy. So I asked her to just. hold me to doing them. We don't start playing until the shot is done. so my needle fear doesn't matter because now it's Wasting™ her time and I have to do it quick. Using one neurosis to defeat another.
It's a horrible coping mechanism because it's feeding the inconvenience fear, but it is definitionally a coping mechanism.
#im a 'has a panic attack during every injection or iv theyve ever gotten' type of scared of needles#no it genuinely has nothing to do with pain the needle itself is the fear not the using of it#like i told this story before but i have these sewing pins with lil bow ties on them and i had to get my dad to take all the blue ones out#because they were triggering the same part of my brain iv needles do#just the sight of them with the rest of my cute sewing pins was a problem#And the fear of being an inconvenience is so bad i cant eat around people or be in crowded spaces or talk at get togethers#without being paralyzed by fear of Being In The Way. its so bad ive been avoiding using my power chair bc it makes me take up#slightly more space than i would just standing. and i never took my manual out and about because i moved too slowly in it#and i dont take my crutches on planes despite using them everyday bc they cant fold up like my cane can and so are In The Way#one of the big reasons i dont use the chairs in stores is they have back up alarms. and i hate making noises in public#Yes this is part of the reason i want a Rottweiler for my service dog because i want people to look at the doggie Not Me.#I like people! i like being friendly and talking and making little connections with strangers!!! But i cant be the one to initiate or#be In The Way of a peaceful moment#dont look at me#this is also a big issue i have with making friends or changing the nature of a relationship because like. im autistic#I have Rules for social interactions memorized that i will follow. but moving people from one category to another#is difficult. It is too the point i had problems for litteral years talking to my boyfriend as though#he was a person i knew well and cared deeply for because i kept using the 'rando guy im flirting with on the Internet' script#I have commissioners i want to be friendlier with but my brain says No Stop that is an Impolite and Overly informal way to talk to#a customer™ despite them not being customers when they arnt in the commission process#im like thise huskies who are scared of carpet because its Different than the floor they're currently standing on#its Too different:(#and to be clear i am Completely aware of how none of this makes logical sense and is in fact deeply self destructive#That does not fix it. it is so ingrained in my head that im certain i could convince my brain to let me bite off my own fingers#before i could convince it to let me talk to someone at a help desk or ask my order be corrected at a restaurant
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slutdge · 1 year ago
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"but mcr and green day mean so much to queer people!!!" wow thats sad, i hope the people in my community get better taste. still not punk music.
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insensible-waters · 8 months ago
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Sketch I did earlier of our favorite old man
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And my kinda halfassed attempt at coring it that ended up with a very different vibe than what id intended when I started
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I originally just wanted to practice coloring his hair and then I ended spending the least amount of time and effort on that in the end, Oopie ig
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gyaru-tau · 8 months ago
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Woah what happened to that guy
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bookshelfdreams · 1 year ago
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moonsidesong · 7 months ago
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when my ipad dies (which i don't intend on letting happen for a while, of course) i think my next drawing tablet's just gonna be for the computer. i basically never draw away from my laptop anymore and i wanna make bad doodles in ms paint more often because nothing ever replaces the feel of ms paint
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sonknuxadow · 7 months ago
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people who arent really into sonic that are incapable of talking about it or seeing others talk about it without making fun of it or repeating some overdone meme reference really are some of the most annoying and unfunny people on planet earth i think
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mysticicefire · 2 months ago
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Fucking gnawing at the cages of my enclosure bc im banned from hanging out with friends due to internet issues
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professionaljester · 5 months ago
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once again i have succumbed to fomo and peer pressure lmao
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sonic-adventure-3 · 10 months ago
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auuuuugh i keep trying to buy sonic 06 and sonic the fighters on my 360 but xbox live won’t fucking sign me in and xbox marketplace won’t recognize my payment methods!!! the xbox 360 digital store is shutting down really soon, so while i can probably maybe find a super overpriced physical 06 copy, i don’t think i’ll be able to get sonic the fighters for 360 any other way. is anyone else having similar problems or have any solutions?
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22degreehalo · 1 year ago
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I'll say it as many times as it needs to be said. There is absolutely miniscule actual harm that comes from engaging with Harry Potter in 2024. JK Rowling does not need money. Anything sent her way is less than a rounding error. And the book series was literally EVERYWHERE in the 90s and 2000s. Like it or not, it DID impact a whole generation of people - pretending that never happened is completely absurd, if not outright irresponsible. It happened. It's just a fact. Harry Potter is mainstream. There is nothing that can be done to 'promote' it. It's already there.
What all this obsession with HP on tumblr is about? An easy way to smugly define Good People from Bad People. Because if you *really* cared about trans people enough, you'd hate everything associated with Harry Potter. Regardless of how much you adored it when you were 8 and went to Harry Potter parties with your family all dressed up quoting book lines at one another in your most precious childhood memories because for once your special interest actually aligned with the people closest to you. No, all those positive associations should have been deleted instantly. If you *cared enough*, it would just *happen*.
Which is why a whole slew of people who previously had earnestly reblogged posts about Moral OCD and how bad tumblr can be about it were suddenly cackling about how buying Hogwarts Legacy was comparable to *refusing to throw The One Ring into Mordor, starting a war that would kill millions.* And how donating to a pro-trans charity (an act that would have VASTLY more impact than aforementioned rounding error) is comparable to 'donating to a pro-elf charity' in the wake of that.
Because tumblr doesn't actually give a shit about autistics or OCD sufferers. When we complain about stuff that they also dislike, they proudly reblog that and rage in the notes about how selfish and cruel and Individualist those other people on tumblr are!!! But the *second* they get to paint themselves as the ones with '''''good thoughts and feelings'''''' they take it, and make up posts about how HP likers 'believe they're the main character and everything should revolve around them.'
Is it actually about whether something causes harm? Or is it about dividing the world into Inherently Good People and Inherently Bad People? Is it actually about doing real good for the community and making the world a better place? Or is it about shaming people with the Wrong Emotions until they fucking hate themselves and spend hours upon hours ruminating on end trying to change themselves because their inability to let go of positive Harry Potter feelings is OBVIOUSLY evidence of a truly inescapably evil and cruel and wretched identity that the world would be better off without?
Which is it, actually? When it actually feels a little bit good to feel like you're on the Right Side of all of this, for once?
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never-quite-buried · 4 months ago
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It’s genuinely depressing watching people rooting for the tiktok ban on tumblr. “Yes get rid of the misinformation pipeline!” as if I wasn’t lowkey tracking black salve facebook groups or the weird urine cults on Twitter 10 years ago. Misinformation and the algorithms that feed it to you were not invented by tiktok and they will not go away just because the gov has shut down a single app.
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xentama · 1 year ago
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Until next time... Stay Fresh!
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broke-on-books · 4 months ago
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WHY is the public library wifi soooo shitty kys
Genuinely ridiculous I'm sorry
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kirbychar · 9 months ago
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for a sec i thought the internet got fixed... i rlly dont get it
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onemillionfurries · 1 year ago
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