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angel-eyes05 · 2 years ago

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to leave the warmest bed i've ever known

pairing: spiderwoman!reader x miguel o’hara

summary: after miguel’s fight with miles, you confront him in his office

warnings: this whole thing is basically one big argument there’s SO much angst, implied suicide attempt, HUGE ATSV SPOILERS DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE, im projecting a little in some parts of this ngl (i cried writing a certain section of this, you'll know it when you read it lmao), mentions and descriptions of blood, gore, and death

word count: 4.1k

notes: i watched the movie yesterday…and miguel is on my mind. but i remember reading this namor x reader fanfic after i watched wakanda forever of a similar idea to this and i loved it so this is HEAVILY inspired by that fic, but just make it miguel. i would link it but ngl that was so long ago and i dont remember the author. if i end up finding it again ill put it here. also, just pretend miguel has been doing this whole spider society thing for a couple of years at least, it just needs to work like that for this ik its probably not canon but just roll with it lmao. and yes the title is a taylor swift lyric im so glad you noticed (im so sorry she's in my brain rn with the eras tour)

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The anger boiled up inside your chest as you stormed your way across the lobby. Hundreds of different Spider-Man variants were scattered across the area, some more injured than the others. It sickened you sometimes. How he had so many people under his grasp and just decided to throw some of them at the walls sometimes, not caring how hard they hit the floor because they were all just ammo to him. How despite his denials of it, that’s probably what your role was to him as well. Nothing more than a bullet in his massive machine gun.

You normally tried not to think about it, how his determination towards his goal sometimes meant lack of care for others. But this time he had just gone too far. You always had a soft spot for Miles, watching closely on him whenever Miguel would let you go though scanners of all the different variants. You admired his struggle, but eventual success to taking up the previous Peter’s mantle, and always hated how Miguel talked about him. You knew there was no way Miles could’ve asked for any of this. For the pressures and struggles of being a Spider-Man, for everything causing such a strained relationship with his parents, for the death of his uncle, and for what will be the eventual death of his father. You definitely didn’t.

Ok lets do this one last time. Eh, whatever, there’s probably gonna be 50 other introductions after this one so it doesn’t really matter.

Being Earth-837’s Spider-Man has never been easy. Especially since you were bit when you were only 13 (another reason you sympathized with Miles and Gwen). Your life had followed the order of canon events to a perfect T, your older brother killed in a fight with a robber only two months after you were bit. You tried to overcome the burden of your powers by trying to live as normal of a teenage life as possible, but it was mostly in vain, having to give up multiple friendships and relationships in fear of those you love getting hurt. This was only elevated when your boyfriend Peter was murdered in the crossfire of an encounter with Doc Ock. You didn’t understand. You couldn’t. What you had done to deserve all of this. All you did was just be in the wrong place at the wrong time. You wonder sometimes what would happen if someone was in the same place you were when you got bit. If someone else went to the closed down area of that museum and ran into that spider. That stupid spider that ruined your life. Those thoughts slowly started to disappear for a bit. For a few years things were easy. Things seemed like they were finally going in your favor.

You were 25 when it happened. The last canon event. Ever since you were a little girl you hated your mother’s job. Losing nights of sleep over if she would come home or not. She always did though. She was good at her job. Too good though. Good enough to get promoted to police captain, which for who you were, was basically sealing her fate. She saved so many people that day. You were too busy fighting Venom to notice how much collateral damage you were causing in the process. Your mother’s job was to evacuate all the citizens away from the fight. She died shielding a child from incoming debris. A noble way to go. But god was it gruesome. You found her after the fight was over, two metal poles impaling her. One through her stomach and one straight through her face, pools of blood growing bigger below her as she was left there, all the paramedics busy trying to save the heavily injured. You froze when you finally recognized her, unable to at first due to how mutilated her face was from the pole. Suddenly, you were transported back to being a six year old, falling asleep outside the door to your mother’s bedroom so you would know exactly when she would come home. Purposefully falling asleep in her arms so that she couldn’t go anywhere.

When you used the key she had given you to get into her apartment that night, and you slept in her room, desperate to intake anything left of her before she was fully gone. You doused yourself in her perfume so it still felt like she was standing right behind you. You had always loved her smell. The smell of vanilla, curl product, and fancy perfume. They were attached to memories you had of her. Trying on her heels when you were a kid to try and be fancy like her. Smelling her hair in the morning before school to comfort you before she left for work. Despite all of this bringing you comfort, all it really did was cause further denial in your heart. That one day you were gonna hear the keys clacking in the keyhole to your apartment one more time. That’s all you really wanted. You would give everything up in a heartbeat just to hear her police scanner go off one last time. But it wasn’t going to. And it was your fault. Deep down you knew it was. You should’ve done a better job controlling the debris. You had always been a messy fighter, but you didn’t know it was going to mean anything until it was too late.

How you got up to the top of that building is still a blur to you to this day. But next thing you know, you were looking at the New York City skyline from the very top of the Empire State Building. And at the very edge too. You heard some sounds behind you, but you just decided it was the wind howling from how high up you were. You were just so tired. Everything and everyone you loved was cursed all because of you. And with your mother as the most recent victim, you decided you finally had enough. You took a deep breath, eyes overflowed with water, as you set your foot forward.

Your plummet was interrupted by a sudden contact you felt to your forearm. Shock filled your body as you turned around to look at what had stopped your attempt. The blue hand was massive, nearly wrapping back around onto itself as it held onto you for dear life. You finally looked up at face that the hand belonged to. The mask that covered the massive figure was a strange one. Blue with strange red silhouettes for the eyes. It kind of reminded you of…your own costume? That couldn’t be though there was no way. This must be the afterlife or something. You already jumped and that's why you didn’t remember your way up to the top. This was some kind of creature trying to stop you from jumping down to hell below. His breaths were heavy and loud, almost like he was desperate to stop you. This convinced you that this was real, which caused you to try to escape from his grip. He was stronger than you, and was putting up a huge fight. You were slick though. Once you were out of his hand, you closed your eyes and quickly made your jump. Everything flashed before your eyes. Your brother, Peter, your mom. You were hoping to see them soon. This was very quickly interrupted again when you suddenly stopped falling. Something had attached itself to your stomach. You opened your eyes. A web? This web was much different than yours though. It was glowing a bright, neon orange.

The man was holding onto the end of it tightly with both hands. His mask then disappeared to show his face. His was long, matching how big the rest of his body was, defined cheek bones sticking out. Brown wavy hair slicked back with a few loose strands flying out in the wind. The look of desperation on his face stook out most of all. Why did he care so much? He didn’t know you, and you definitely didn’t know him. “Let me pull you up. Please,” he said to you between shaky pants. You stared at him for a bit before nodding. He slowly pulled you up with the string of his web, each move more careful than the last. As soon as your feet were planted safely back on the roof of the building, he wrapped you up in his massive arms. You appreciated the gesture, but you didn’t return it, still very confused about why he was so concerned. He was so big around your body though, you couldn’t help but feel a little comforted, feeling his still shaky breaths against the hairs of your neck. Soon after, he clicked on some buttons on his neon orange watch and led you into a portal.

The rest is history. You’re grateful he found you that day. It allowed you to meet so many people, Peter B., Jess, Gwen, Hobie, Ben, Pavitr, Margo. They all related to you and you felt like you could share things with them that you couldn’t do with anyone else. You had grown especially close to Peter and Jess, both of them having been in the game for a long time, just like you. They both knew how you felt, having lost so much and growing so tired after so many years. Peter even named you as Mayday’s godmother when she was born, a gesture that caused you to nearly kill him with your hug. Miguel though was different. He wasn’t nearly as social as the rest of your friends, but you found yourself having much more intimate moments with him (in more ways then one). You eventually found out why Miguel was so concerned for you the day you met. He had taken interest in your abilities early into looking for variants for his little “project”, but refrained from roping you into something so dangerous while you were still in your teens.

Once you were old enough though, he started paying more and more attention, hoping to catch you in a fight and recruit you then. But he was always pulled away with more important duties to attend to. That was until he witnessed your canon event. He had seen it happen so many times before through his scanners. It was going to happen. It had to in order for your universe to not collapse in on itself. But for some reason, yours hurt more than the rest to him. Especially how you coped with it. Seeing you wrap yourself up in her blankets and clothes broke his heart. He knew where this would lead to. That’s why he was there that day. To save you. He had to, or he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. You got your own watch immediately, along with your own room in the Spider Society headquarters. He stayed close with you for the first month of you being a member of the team. When he wasn’t out on missions, he was with you. You didn’t really know what to label you two as, but whatever was going on, you liked it. And he did too.

That is until Miles came into the picture. Once Miles was bit, all hell broke loose for Miguel. He was always in some alternate dimension catching some Spider-Man villain who got out and rangled them back over here, falling back over to you more beat up and bruised than the last time. You couldn’t imagine how much stress he was under, the fate of the entire multiverse up to him. You had some ways of helping him relieve his stress, but you wish you could convince him that he wasn’t alone in this. But nothing ever got through to him. He had become distant, aloof even. You tried bringing it up to Jess every so often, but she would just brush it off.

“That’s how he’s always been.” Not to you he hasn’t. This week has been hell though. With Spot making it over to Miles, Miguel had been going into rages all week. You had put up with it for now, but that was all about to stop. Watching how harsh he was being on Miles, throwing so many Spider-Men at an innocent boy, risking all of their lives in the process. Disregarding everything Gwen and Peter were feeling and then throwing Gwen back into her broken world with nothing. He had gone too far. No one else was going to stand up to him about it, so you knew it had to be you. Maybe he would listen, maybe he wouldn’t. It didn’t really matter. He just needed to hear it.

“It’s not worth it you know.” The voice snapped you out of your thoughts, stopping you in your tracks. “You know how stubborn he gets over these things,” said Jess, trying to convince you to save your breath. “I don’t care. I have to at least try,” you responded, monotonically. “I just don’t understand how you can follow him so blindly and not see what he’s doing is wrong.” “Because he isn’t wrong. I don’t know about you, but I’m not just gonna stand by and let some kid’s stupid decisions destroy another Earth,” Jess argued. “He’s just trying to save his dad, I can’t understand how that makes him such a bad person,” you said, finally turning around to face her, shocked when she was closer to you than expected.

“You know exactly why. Don’t be so naive, y/n,” she shot back. “You can’t stop me,” you said staring straight into her. She shrugged. “Then I can’t help you.” She began to walk away. You did to, until you heard her say. “You don’t know how much he cares for you.” You turned around to face her again, but her back was still to you, her head tilted ever so slightly to look at you. “If you really do care for the kid, watch what you say to Miguel right now. Cause you might just give him the final push he needs to do what needs to be done.” You didn’t give her a response, and just simply kept walking. You felt Jess’ eyes on your back as you entered the elevator to get up to Miguel’s office.

The elevator ride up felt longer than it should’ve, as you tried to gather all of your thoughts and emotions together so even if he didn’t listen, your words would still stick with him in some way. You didn’t necessarily want to hurt him (though your fists were telling you otherwise), but you did want him to be aware of what he’s done. Once the doors finally opened, all of that work flew out the window as rage took over your body again, seeing Miguel up there looking at the scanners. The fact that he looked just as normal as he always does made you furious. It’s like nothing happened.

“You know, I could hear you coming in from the lobby,” he said, almost stopping you in your tracks. You hated when he did that. Claiming that he knew what your every move was going to be. Like you were under his control or something. “Yeah, well then you must’ve heard me talking to Jess, which means you know exactly what this is about,” you shot back, stopping to where you could see him perched up there. “Why don’t you just save me the conversation about morality and just come up here and kick my ass already. It’ll save both of us time,” he said, not even taking his eyes off the scanners to look down at you. This only added to your fury. “That’s not what I’m here for Miguel, so don’t you dare try to twist my words here. What you did to that kid was fucked up and you know it.” “Oh yeah, then why didn’t you try to do anything to stop me?” he questioned.

“Because I’m not stupid Miguel. I’m not gonna try to take down hundreds of Spider-Men at once.” “Oh, cause you’re so much better than that?” This wasn’t like him at all. That gentle, kind, and caring Miguel you once knew was gone, taken over by some sort of personal vendetta he had against Miles. “Listen, I don’t know what’s going on with you, but this all needs to stop before it gets taken too far. You’re getting into a fight you can’t win. That kid’s strong and so are his allies. And if you go any further into this, I won’t be here to help you.” He stayed still and only turned his head to look at you. “And what makes you think that you’re so important to my plan that it’ll fall apart if you leave? Have you really become that pretentious?”

Your body froze. Have I really? No no no, that’s exactly what he wants. If you begin to doubt yourself now, you’ll stay and nothing will change. You knew you were right. He was trying to crumble you down, but you wouldn’t let that happen. “And you really think that one kid is going to ruin something that you’ve been working for for years? How insecure you’ve become.” “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said, turning back away from you. You did the same, wiping off your face in anger. “I hate it when you do tha-,” you said as you turned back around, but were cut off to find Miguel standing there right in front of you. He was close. Too close to your liking, although in any other circumstance you would’ve found this attractive.

He tilted his head up, but his eyes were down staring daggers into yours. You hated how much he tried to make himself seem more superior to you. “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he repeated, this time slower as if you were a child. “He’s just a kid Miguel,” you said in a low, quiet voice. “An anomaly. And a dangerous one at that.” “God Miguel, all he wants to do is protect his dad, do you know how insane you sound right now?” you said letting out a slight laugh when you finished. You backed away from him a little. “He doesn’t know how much damage he’ll do with this. Saving his father will only prolong the inevitable. His world will be gone within hours if he does this. All I’m trying to do is make him understand,” he tried to explain. “By trying to kill him.” “You always have to exaggerate the situation,” he said palming his face. “But that’s essentially what you’re trying to do isn’t it? Why not snuff out the problem entirely by taking him out!”

He signed and began to walk away while you were talking, bringing up your anger even more. “Yeah, use all the power you’ve accumulated over the years and just take out the small problem! Except this isn’t just a fly on the wall Miguel. This is a child! An innocent boy who didn’t ask for any of this to happen to him, just like how we didn’t. I get it, I’m sorry that this job is stressful, I really am. But that gives you zero right to act the way you are!” You were screaming at him at this point. You didn’t want to. You didn’t want your emotions to get the best of you. But he was being too stubborn. This was the only way you thought you could get to him. You might not have wanted to, but you needed to hurt him now. It was the only way.

“You can’t be so power blind that you refused to accept the fact that there could be a way around Captain Davis’ death. You said we saved Earth’s before, I’m sure we could do it again.” Your anger only kept rising when he kept walking away and didn’t respond. “This is a personal thing isn’t it?” you asked calmly. You knew it was working now when he stopped walking. “Yeah, it it. You won’t let Miles get his happy ending. Because why should he be pardoned of his burden while the rest of us have suffered so much. While you’ve suffered so much.” The answer to your question was confirmed when Miguel stayed silent. “Just because you didn’t get the life you wanted Miguel, doesn’t mean you have the right to stop other people from getting theirs.”

You knew you overstepped the line when Miguel turned around and started walking towards you, fury burning in his crimson eyes. “Yeah, so what! What if that is what this is all about! You should know better than anyone how much this job takes away from you!” he screamed at you, backing you up into a wall. “Why should he get to be let off so easily, while people like you and me have to suffer so much? Don’t try to turn me into the villain here when I know you’re thinking the exact same thing, y/n.” He wasn’t entirely wrong. You had wondered it at some points. “I won’t let you turn this onto me Miguel, this is about you,” you fired back. “Oh no, you’re not getting off that easily. I know you’re thinking it. And you’re right. Why should Miles get let off so easily when you’ve lost so much.” He held your hands in his, trying to connect to you. “And you have mi vida. You’ve had so much taken from you and it’s unfair. Why should he only have lost one person when you’ve had three taken from you. Your brother, Peter, your moth-.”

He was cut off by your hand striking against his face in a harsh blow. “If you’re smart, and I know you are, you’ll keep those three out of them. I won’t let you drag their names through the dirt for something as stupid as this.” You both stood there for a while, both of your eyes looking towards the ground, hoping it would open up to swallow you both as an escape from this god awful conversation. You never wanted it to come to this. In all honesty, you cared for Miguel. You might’ve even loved him, if you were even capable of doing such a thing. You hoped he felt the same way about you, but in a job like this, he always had at least one wall up around you. It just wasn’t worth it anymore. You were too tired to keep trying for something that was most likely going to fall apart in the end.

“You’re still going after him aren’t you?” you asked, finally breaking the silence. Miguel looked back up at you. “You can’t ask me not to. You know better than anyone why this is so important to me.” He moved his hand up to cup your cheek and kissed your forehead gently. You let it sit there for a minute out of habit before pushing it off your face. “And you must know why I can’t stay anymore then.” His shoulders dropped. “Whatever this thing between us is. It’s over. I can’t stay beside someone who can’t see what he’s doing is wrong.” Miguel’s dropped hand turned into a fist of anger. “Fine,” he spat in your face. “I don’t need someone like you in my way. You’re just a liability to this anyways.” He began to walk away from you back to his scanners. “Just don’t come crying back over to me when your little plan doesn’t work out, cause I won’t help you.” He used his webs to pull himself back up to the platform to keep looking for Miles. You stood there for a second, gathering yourself.

Five years. Out the door just like that. It bewildered you how easily a bond like you two had could be broken all because of one teenager. You began to make your way for the door before you said. “When this is all over…don’t try to find me.” He didn’t respond. Once the elevator doors opened, you rushed inside, desperate to get away from him. So many thoughts rushed through your head as the doors closed and you sunk down back to the lobby to leave. You didn’t have much of a plan. This could end up being a horrible idea. Your gut told you it was the right thing to do though. And that was enough for you. You walked out of the headquarters lobby with a new heart and a new mind, ready to take action for your new plan.

First though, you had to find Gwen.

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a/n: god that took longer than it should've. dw dw i'll do a part 2 if enough people ask for one. im not 100% sure how im gonna do a part 2 cause yk....idk how beyond the spiderverse is gonna go so tbh, we're just gonna make it go the way i want lmao. thanks for reading, ik this was kind of a long one lmao

NEXT CHAPTER

#miguel o’hara #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #into the spider verse #spider-woman reader #across the spiderverse #fem!reader #fanfic #fanfiction #spiderman #spider man #spider man: across the spider verse #spiderverse

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yourdadsbasement · 11 days ago

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it's too dangerous to go alone! take this (3 wk old wolf pup)

i am very curious about martin's other imaginary friends

kinda like you

the iconic Juice death scene

it's adorable that jimmy took his hat off out of respect for the dead

the amount of times i really relate to zach varmitech is...discomforting

lmao i love that he calls her immediately

donita laying out the straight dope

hacky sacky zachy

excellent chris face

zach is making the classic mistake of conflating long life with eternal youth and beauty, like the Sybil of Delphi

lmfao at Gavin trying to chase off a Zachbot with a broom

i know it's cartoon logic but this man is holding a BOULDER in one arm and a GALAPAGOS TORTOISE in the other, i want him and gourmand to have a wrestling match so bad

ok so storytime, when i was a preteen back in the Paleozoic Era, i worked at the food booth at a 4H fair in rural upstate New York and we were right across the midway from the "Freak Animal" tent, which played the same two promotional tapes one after the other all day long. one of the advertised freaks was "the Fish Girl! is she fish or is she girl???" and to this day my sisters and i say "is she fish or is she girl???" to each other

zach has so many of the best lines, this sounds like it should be the punchline to a "yo mama" joke

oh this look is GOOD, @martincrushcameback we've done goth Zach can we now do grunge Zach?

sure until the expanding sun turns the earth into a molten rock

yeah i was kinda thinking that jellyfish don't have any good powers except letting you live forever as a jellyfish, and that's kinda not worth it. especially since you can still get eaten

chizach canon idc idc

what i say to men before hooking up

zach does not approve of the friendly arm around shoulders

#wild kratts #martin kratt #chris kratt #kratt brothers #wk live blogging #wk marathon #zach varmitech #animals who live to be 100 years old #grunge zach #this is going to be gross

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burningcheese-merchant · 6 days ago

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How on earthbread do you ship BurningCheese. Im gonna try to not judge you. This is 80% a non-rethorical question. like genuinely how do you ship them?? /lh

I was wondering when someone would come ask me this lol. It's ok though, you can be honest, I can feel you narrowing your eyes at me through the screen 👀

I could honestly go on for a REALLY long time about why I ship BurningCheese/GoldenSpice. But I'll try to distill/narrow down my thoughts the best I can so my answer isn't longer than the Bible

I adore the enemies to lovers trope and hero/villain pairings in general. I did long before Cookie Run and I will long afterwards

I like how they complement and contrast against each other, aesthetically + personality-wise + backstory-wise

I love how they interact with each other. I love how they talk and snipe at each other. Golden Cheese's frustrated yet unyielding confidence and wit VS Burning Spice's brash, raucous excitement is fun to see. (The back-and-forth they have during their fight in episode 6 is dangerously close to how I've written them in my fics, even before the episode came out. So technically, in a way, my fics have been canonized lol)

It's fun imagining them together in different ways. A one-sided crush/obsession on Burning Spice's part is fun in a dark way (my Yandere Spice). So is a mutual love and respect between them. Main canon for me is a slow burn romance and a slow redemption arc for Spice alongside it. I also have an AU where Golden corrupts and becomes a Beast herself, and they become an evil villain couple. I have another where Spice doesn't get better and Golden doesn't get worse, they just have the standard forbidden love affair that they hide from the world (the latter out of fear of judgement, the former just so no one can try to keep them apart). I've got a million story ideas with them. You can do all sorts of things with them imo. And I think it works because of how they bounce off of each other. Put them in different situations and see how their relationship changes/adjusts/adapts, see if love can exist and how

I like their size difference. Spice is significantly taller and wider than Golden and it's really funny to see lol

The way they and their relationship/dynamic parallel actual Egyptian and Indian mythology (the latter in particular) is absolutely unreal

Not kidding, I can go on about the symbolism and allusions and references forever. I could write an actual paper on it. How can a ship go THIS hard

Come on, don't act like they wouldn't give each other a fantastic time in bed lmao

They follow each other around in my kingdom almost 24/7. Literally every single time I log in they're next to each other or one is trailing behind the other while they walk somewhere. If they want to be together that badly, I'm not going to stop them

They are literally the cycle of life and death, they have the single most important connection of all the Beasts and Ancients, one simply cannot go on without the other for together they make up the foundation of the goddamn cosmos

It actually all started with me and someone irl joking about Burning Spice having a stalker crush when the very first trailer came out. Then I went "haha that could be a funny fic". Then I wrote it and went "wait this is an interesting idea". Then episode 5 came out and I went "wait wtf does he actually want her??? He's acting like he does in my fic!!!" Then I wrote more and got even more attached to the one-sided attraction dynamic. Then I started imagining them in an actual, normal relationship and how that might pan out. Then I started writing stuff for/about that and I got extremely attached to that. Now they have a fully fleshed out relationship and they're married and have two kids, and I have a billion side stories and AUs, and any other ship involving either of them viscerally repulses me. I unironically memed too close to the sun and immediately fell straight down into BurningCheese hell (but it's ok, I like it here and I don't plan on leaving ever)

I can and I want to and no one can stop me

I still wrote a Bible, didn't I lol. BurningCheese/GoldenSpice is perfect in every way, they are my ride-or-die and you can pry the ship from my cold, dead hands. The end, roll credits

#trust me I really can go on about this ship for eternity lol. Don't tempt me #Don't tempt me about PitayaFire either. Same issue. Ride-or-die. 10k word analysis. Complex and fascinating relationship. I CAN GO ON.#anyway Evil Spice Man and Pretty Cheese Lady being in love go brr #cookie run kingdom #burning spice cookie #golden cheese cookie #burningcheese #goldenspice #merchant asks

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rosie-kairi · 6 months ago

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Do you have any more thoughts about that AU where Ephemer is the only union leader who actually got chosen? Because it is rotating in my mind at consistent intervals forever

Ah yes, the Traitor(s) au. One of the funniest things I've thought up imo, I just could never come up with a follow up asdfdsdfs.

Well I've always imagined it as spy vs spy vs spy shenanigans. Ventus is like in canon where he doesn't actually know he's not supposed to be there, but the other three are very aware that they're "imposters" so to speak. They've got sneaking suspicions that one of the other three is also an imposter, and are going to great lengths to expose them and solidify their innocence in the eyes of the others. Like, Skuld thinks Brain is suspicious, Brain thinks Lauriam is suspicious, and Lauriam doesn't trust Skuld. You could put that in any order and you'd get the point lmao. It's like this:

In my mind, Brain stole his book because he and Ava had that conversation on the hill like in canon and he's just like "Aight, I'm gonna have to brute force my way into this. somebody's gotta save the world from doom and it's gonna be me." so he's got the "greater good" excuse.

Skuld stole her book because she wanted to be able to keep a close eye on both Ephemer and Player without getting her memory wiped. It's mostly her being "I went through all of that bs to save you, I'm not gonna wipe that from my mind." so it's a bit selfish but it's understandable I think.

Lauriam has the most room for speculation I guess since we don't know what he was doing Pre-keyblade war, but I like to think he knew the person he stole his book from personally and was like "Ok, this guy's a massive asshole, he does NOT deserve to run this town." (guy was probably running his mouth and bragging to other kids about him being selected as union leader).

Of course in classic Master of Masters fashion, he planned for all of this to play out. This is the closest thing he has to soap operas let him have this.

Bonus: I just imagine Brain looking at the list of chosen names and going like "hm. what's my level of care in this situation. This confirms my suspicions that [x] is an imposter like me, but apparently everybody else besides Ephemer is as well. what the hell do I do" and then you cut to Luxu just laughing asdsads

#ask rosie a question!#anon ask #kingdom hearts union x #khux #kingdom hearts #traitor(s) au #kh lauriam #kh skuld #kh brain #lauriam #skuld #brain #spy vs spy vs spy ass au

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holy-reference-in-a-username · 5 months ago

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Hi, random comment but Holy shit your half-transformed Monster Tom with the mouth in his chest is so fucking cool! Also, monsterfucker Tord is so real! Can only imagine Tord's reaction when he saw Tom like half-transformed for the first time.

THANK YOU! im like. super happy with how i draw tom, monster form ABSOLUTELY included. i put like. way too much thought into it lmao but ive always been a fan of unique creature designs so what else is new.

RRRAAH RAMBLINGS UNDER THE CUT

so ive been obsessed with the concept since i figured out what exactly happened during PowerEdd, ~2015. tom was kind of already my favorite but i only got more obsessed now that i could draw him with claws and fangs now.

(lmao old art^ lets all point and laugh)

when i finally got back into eddsworld this most recent time and started thinking about how i'd draw the guys i already knew i wanted tom to be trans, so when i started sketching i drew him with top surgery scars... which kind of looked like teeth... and the canon monster design already has a mouth on its chest/head... it just worked!!

...

ok tangent time- i dont like the canon design very much (the combined head/torso is Very limiting for poses. F!!!) but i also have never really liked the popular fanon of just making monster tom a wolf with horns and a single eye. it always feels so reductive!! do you KNOW how many monsters there are out there who are just "big dog/cat plus one fantastical feature"???? MANY!! so i was pretty determined to find a design i liked (one that was both flexible and fairly unique) before putting it in anything.

...and the partial transformation cliche of just putting accessories on a character is SUPER boring to me. so i wanted something that would be an actual halfway point to a fucked up freaky creature that is only barely humanoid.

ok back on track it took me like fuckin forever to finally get the final ~50% design together. i tried mimicking the merged torsohead of the canon monster and it just left me disappointed. :/

the single blank eye instead of the rest of the face was a god damn GENIUS move i am so proud of it im pretty sure the first time i drew the design was the actual draft sketch for the comic. because fuck making reference sheets!! the design's in your mind, right???

oh! as for the second half of your ask, the first time Tord saw Tom half transformed was right here^^!!

then a couple weeks after that i managed to find a 100% design i liked that still looked like a reasonable end point. at which point i actually made a little ref sheet! BEFORE i used the design in a comic!! it hasnt gotten much use but i still like it :)

i took a much more wyrm-like horizontal approach as opposed to the vertical design of the original, but the arms (connected to top of spine, directly behind head) and legs (close to the bottom, optional) allow it to still match the original's body plan, especially from the front view. then extra legs, big spiky scales, even larger mouth... because who wants just a dog with horns am i right!!

ahaha so basically im incredibly proud of how the design turned out so thank u for liking it :))

#RAMBLE TIME #i say shit #i say shit? more like i say diarrhea.#...because i keep saying so much shit.#no dont give me that #ew monster tom #my art #sketch #ask

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wwasted · 11 days ago

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being sentimental over that fact that this fandom has such amazing writers and creators despite the fact that it’s so small! so i figured I’d tag some of my favs and give them a nice compliment bc they truly deserve it and we should all show our appreciation for allowing us along on the journey!!! ok now on to me fangirling under the cut.

@blixabargelds frankie… the way your brain works is mind blowing. Like you are so amazing??? I regularly reread fics by you and am constantly pouring over the superstar tag to the point where I feel I could recite asks you’ve gotten months ago lmao. I know you’ve been struggling with writing through these last few months but your work is so truly special!!! Thank you for sharing it with us!

@swifty-fox i know your thoughts on being a writer, but you are truly so brilliant and kind and amazing. Every au or canon fic you come up with is so captivating. The mota fandom is truly lucky to have you writing for it! I’m so excited for everything you have coming up! (Also ps I’ll make as many edits as you desire for snippets 🥰) also not to mention, the art?????? Actually lost for words. You have my endless love and appreciation.

@feyd-meowtha i will 100% read anything you ever write regardless of fandom forever (as proven by the gladiator II fic, still have absolutely no idea but I love it bc you wrote it) thank you for allowing me to scream into discord chat every single time you post a new chapter of 3 am. The handholding thru it does not go unnoticed lmao. (And also allowing me to whine about my own writing ur the best) I truly don’t know how you do it but I am so thankful you do!

@wayrad I know we’ve joked about your age in the wota discord, but omg. If I had even a sliver of your talent at 18, I would’ve been insufferable and yet you’re the sweetest and constantly gracing us with amazing fics. My obsession with the truck stop series haunts me in the best way and I can’t wait to see where you take us next!!

@middlingmay the amount of times I’ve reread TODCL is probably frightening. It is such an amazing story and I’m always blown away by how each character feels so alive. Sometimes I get so immersed in reading that these feel like real people I know and not just characters. Mindblowing how you do that. I’m also so obsessed with all the other AUs you create because how??? Genius

@donotnomi stripper bucky my beloved ❤️ your fic has completely taken over my mind. There is something so ethereal about it. It reminds me of doing LSD in a good way lmao the slow burn is amazing and I always get so excited when I get an email that a new chapter has been posted.

@constanthaunt born right in the doorway will live rent free in my head for eternity!!! I’ve already reread it twice since you finished it and I actually have no words??? The way you weave thoughts and sentences together is so criminal. Like straight to jail for being so amazing at words. I’d love to study your mind so I could have some of that talent!! Can’t wait to see what else you write.

@joeyalohadream the fluff is so good it almost makes me cry. I normally love overdosing on angst and pain but when you post something I immediately drop everything to devour it bc I know it will make me feel all warm inside. I can’t wait for more tree farmer Gale fic regardless of what season it is!!!

@irregularcollapse the incredible mind that came up with the DIY punk au??? The tennis fic??? The actors fic??? THE CANNIBALISM?! Everything you write is so amazing, I always find myself coming back to reread. I could actually live in your fic tumblr tags. The online dating??? It’s actually the fic of my dreams. The genius really knows no bounds. Thank you for sharing with us!

#can u tell we’ve been doing gratitude work in therapy fhdjsjsj #but no actually I may make this a regular thing bc there’s so many amazing people here #and I could spend hours screaming about all of them #anyway.. enjoy my cringe fangirling I’m going to hide now

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thenyoumightaswellwrestleangels · 9 months ago

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Please save me from this light of mine (please stay with me in the dark)

Your small hands in the palm of mine - series masterlist here

pairing: gojo satoru x reader x geto suguru (gender neutral)

length: 1.6k

genre: lil angsty

warnings: this is the beginning of the spiral into insanity lmao but I promise we are doing the happy timeline here ok this is not going to follow canon, lil angsty here but y'all know I would never leave you with heartbreak forever <3

a/n: I think this is about uuuh cutting the ppl you love with your sharp edges :( so anyway

There's a heaviness in the air, the humidity weighing on you as the summer sun beats down. Laying in the grass, feeling your chest heave as you try to catch your breath and your clothes stick to your sweat-slicked skin, you feel almost - almost at your limit. Not quite, though. Not until -

A shadow passes over you, blocking out the scorching heat of the sun, and when you open your eyes, you're met with Suguru's concerned face, his hand stuffed in the pockets of his school uniform.

"Aw, you're blocking the light," you sigh, but there's a fatigue in your voice that just causes his brows to bunch further together. He moves anyway, though, choosing instead to sit next to you and stare down at your figure. Not that you'd notice, your eyes fluttering shut again to ward off the bright sunlight.

"Think you've had more than enough sunlight today," he answers easily, eyeing your figure. Your breath has started to calm, your chest rising and falling a bit slower. "And more than enough practicing. How long have you been out here?"

"Not that long," you respond, shrugging as best you can with your hands interlocked behind your head, cushioning you as the grass sways around you. The breeze is welcome- a cool, sweet reverie until you're interrupted again.

"Aw, now don't go lying to us," Satoru says, being the one to tower over you this time. You open your eyes again to squint up, glaring at him as he grins down at you for a moment before planting himself on the other side of you. "You left this morning. The sun's gonna go down soon."

"We're in school," you huff, stubbornly keeping your eyes closed. "We're training. Are we not here to get better? Are you two not?"

"Of course we are," Suguru sighs, and you open your eyes to look up at him. The sun is getting lower on the horizon, the day's light soon to fade along with it. "But we're not here to get ourselves killed. That's what you'll do if you keep going on like this." You scoff at Suguru's words, sitting up to look at him crossly.

"I know what I'm doing - and I know my limits. You don't need to know them for me."

"We're just worried about you, we - hey, we care about you," Satoru begins, but you're already hauling yourself to your feet, determined to end the conversation before it's even really begun. You sway a bit as you stand, and the two of them shoot to their feet on either side of you, hands outstretched. As if they'd need to catch you - as if you'd ever let yourself fall.

"I thought you wanted to be the best, Satoru," you challenge him, your eyes narrowing. He opens his mouth to respond, a surprised pain flashing through his eyes as you keep going before he can speak. "At this rate, it won't take long for me to surpass you."

Neither of them stop you this time when you walk away.

Neither of them come to see you in your dorm later, either - something that causes your heart to stutter in your chest as you lean against your windowsill, staring up at the night sky and the pale, waning moon. You turn over, in your head, what the other two had been saying to you earlier, the hurt in Satoru's eyes and the way Suguru's hand had stayed outstretched, reaching towards you as you walked away You play it over and over in your mind, something worrying gnawing at you when you think of it.

You scoff angrily, letting your head fall forward to rest against the glass of your window. There is a loneliness to this life, you think. And it is made even lonelier by the fact that they haven't seemed to realize that yet. Still, there's a part of you that tugs at your heart, pleads for your feet to move, to carry you down the hall to them. There is a part of your soul that begs for them and you cannot snuff it out.

You can, of course, ignore it. And you do - you always do, digging your heels in and refusing to seek shelter from a storm of your own making.

"Don't you think we should go talk to them," Satoru whines, pouting up at Suguru where he lays sprawled across his bed. He'd ignored Suguru's grumbling about how he has his own dorm room when he came in, making himself comfortable while Suguru had just sighed, shifting to give him more space. Now, he leans forward to pet a hand over Satoru's hair.

"They just need a bit of space tonight, probably. If we crowd them, it might make it worse - you know that," he says softly. Satoru rolls onto his front and buries his face in the blankets.

"I just want to make this better - to help them. They're not alone in this, you know? I don't want…" Suguru sighs and runs his hands up and down Satoru's spine over his shirt.

"I know… I know. I don't want them to feel alone, either. They don't have to do this alone. But… you and I knowing that isn't the same as them knowing, yea?"

"I know," Satoru grumbles, rolling over once more to look up at Suguru where he's sitting up. Satoru reaches up to brush a strand of hair behind Suguru's ear, smoothing over his cheek with his thumb on the way back. "I just wish it was easier to make them understand that."

"It'll come… with time," Suguru says sweetly, catching Satoru's hand with his own to press a kiss to his palm. "We just have to be patient for now."

Suguru thinks, as he watches Satoru, that he may have been wrong on that front. Satoru's talking to you about his techniques, about pushing them and expanding them and making them more powerful - the constant drive for more, more, more. You, for what it's worth, look a bit hesitant about the whole thing.

"Isn't that a bit much, Toru?" You ask, crossing your arms over your chest. He scoffs, waving your concern away.

"You were the one who kept saying it," Satoru points out. "You were the one who told me to catch up." You bristle at his words.

"I didn't mean it like this," you say stubbornly. Satoru pays it no mind, laughing and bumping you with his shoulder.

"You should be nicer, then," he points out. From where Suguru's sitting in the shade, away from the two of you, he can see the way you flinch at that, the way Satoru's words hurt you. But Satoru's already walking away, leaving you to stare after him, blinking in bemusement and something that looks suspiciously like regret.

By the time he's gone, you're stomping over to Suguru to sit next to him, your arms crossed and a frown tugging at your lips. Suguru reaches over to smooth his thumb over your brow gently, a silent reminder for you to relax.

"Is that my fault, do you think?" You ask quietly. Suguru drops his hand to your knee, squeezing reassuringly.

"It was bound to happen," he says kindly. You're not sure you deserve it. "Satoru's… well, he was always going to be the best, one day." You frown at Suguru's words, a furrow appearing again between your brows as you look up at the sky.

"I thought that was going to be me… before I met him." Suguru hums at your confession, unsurprised.

"Does it have to be one of you?" He asks, and if there's a fatigue seeping into his voice, if there's a slouch to his shoulders, you don't notice it.

"Doesn't it?" You press. Your hands ball into fists. "Satoru's scared of it - I know he is. He's got this fear in him and it's making him desperate." Suguru knows what you're talking about. He's seen the fear in Satoru - the fear that he isn't really the best, that he never will be, that he'll always still be beaten.

"And you?" Suguru presses, a sigh leaving him. It's heavy - this weight on his shoulders. He's not sure where it came from or when it got there, this creeping sort of ache that bears down on him. But it's here, nonetheless, and he's not sure he'd holding it up as well as he should be.

He's also not sure he really hears your answer to his question - something about how you've just got a better handle on it all compared to Satoru - how you're surely doing it all right and don't need the help that Satoru needs. Suguru doesn't mention that he's pretty sure Satoru feels the same - that you need help and he doesn't. You don't think to say that you're both thinking it about him, too - that Suguru is the one who needs an outstretched hand.

Either way, Suguru can't quite make himself believe you, not as the weariness of it all begins to collapse on him, the sun beating down just beyond this patch of shade he calls his own, the cicadas droning loud enough that he finds he can't hear himself think anymore. You're sitting right next to him, he supposes, but you feel out of reach, somehow. And Satoru? Well, he's nowhere in sight anymore.

Suguru wonders when he became so alone - thinks of it while you sigh and rest your forehead on his shoulder. He wonders when it all began to go so wrong.

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stgosupremacy · 5 months ago

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you're probably wondering what that nutcase stgosupremacy is gonna post next well you hve your answer now

YEP YEP YEP HERE'S THE NEXT ONE!!!! 🤩🤩

right

let's start off with

this

"Hey Goh, uh, I'm right outside of your apartment-"

"YOU ARE?!"

just the casual moment where goh thought he had a stalker in his hands

actually i didn't really have much to say on this i just thought it was cute when ash explained cerise gave him goh's address and asks goh, where are you now?

THEN HE MAKES THIS FACE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW cmon like HES LITERALLY CRUSHING SO BAD I CAN'TT 🥺💖💖💖💖

like in goh's perspective he didn't know ash was coming to give him the thing he dropped, so he must have thought ash had for some reason changed his mind about going to pallet town and wanted to go with goh instead?? (ok even tho this wasn't the actual case ash actually stays with them anyways so-)

I love it when Ash answers for Goh the second they meet his parents then

LOOK AT THIS SNEAKY BLUSHY GLANCE TO ASH BEFORE THE ANIMATORS SWITCHED THE SCENE WITHIN A SECOND THINKING NO ONE WOULD SEEE 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

goh was down badd the first few episodes cl

bahahaha this is such boyfriend teasing from ash I LOVE IT 🥺😂

right. here comes the best bit

"I had something else for you, I guess I must have lost it or something..."

"You mean this?" 😉😉

i love how you can hear the smile in his voice and it sounds like he was waiting forever to give it to him 😂

I'm not joking i heard like literal wedding bells in this scene 💀 BUT LOOK AT GOH'S LITTLE BLUSH AND HES SO SHOCKED HJFDKN\FDM

"You dropped this right before you got on the bus."

"Wow- You don't really mean you came here just to give it back do you?" (🥺🥺🥺) "All that way?"

THIS IS SO PURE. OHMAGOSDSJ

mk when he said all that way as well you can see how much Goh cant believe him like omggg 😭💖 we all need an ash in our lives i think

"Course!"

what the hell ash is actually so cute bless him

goh seems to think so too bc LOOK AT HIS REACTION BRO 🥺🥺🥺🥺 nah his eyebrows literally start shaking like he cannot contain himselfff and for some reason these wedding bell noises still keep ringing out in this scene HmMMm 😂😂

love to point out the sunset behind them too 🥰💖

"Ash, you're the best!"

he really is 🥺 goh says this a lot actually which he rightfully should

the way goh peeks out over the present to look at him is actually so cute HOW IS THIS SHIP NOT CANON I STILL CANNOT UNDERSTAND

"It's cool!... Now why don't you give it to your mum and dad?"

Ash actually looks kind of looks and sounds nervous when he started speaking which i thought was pretty cute 😂

THIS SCENE IS SO ADORABLE OMG LIVES IN MY HEAD RENT FREE AND I SMILE EVERYTIME I WATCH IT <3

i noted someone pointing this parallel to amourshipping and can't unsee it , this is surely too similar to be coiencedence lmao ‼🤨

the ash de-maturing animation style still trips me up especially when we go to a later scene in the ep...

....they are literally so goofy i actually adore them 😂😂😂

enjoy this beautiful view of vermillion city to finish off!!! (sorry this post seemed so long but it's actually cos i shovedlike 30 pics in it so😍)

this episode is so stuffed with satogou it's insaneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 🥺💗💖

#anipoke #pokemon anime #goh pokemon #pokemon goh #satogou #i miss them #firstfriendshipping #ash ketchum #ash x goh #pokemon journeys

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littlestarbigsky · 3 days ago

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ok i’m bad at writing requests but 😭😭 a fic with any of the curtis bros coming out to each other? specifically soda coming out to them (prob w stevepop but whatever u want) if that makes any sense 😭😭 i loveee ur writing !! 🙈

oh curtis bros my beloved you are sooo special to me :)) im imagining this to be about two-ish months post canon (johnny and dally still died, sorry team :p ) anyways they kinda take the long way around but trust me i did eventually follow the request lmao

hope this is okay🩷

soda knew darry was gonna kill him… even as he walked through the cold november rain he dragged his feet, trying to put off how angry his brother was about to be with him. the house loomed into view and even through the darkness and anxiety sitting in his chest, he couldn’t help but feel glad to see their house, their home.

he pushed the door open and pony and darry were both sitting in the living room, darry on the couch and pony on the floor, leaning up against his legs. they both turned around and stared at soda as he shut the door behind him and started wiping his shoes off on the doormat. he must have been a sight for fresh eyes; his hair plastered to his face and his clothes sticking to him with rain.

none of them knew what was about to happen. none of them had been late getting home since pony ran off, since…

“i’m sorry,” soda stuttered, bending over to take his shoes off, only to realize he didn’t know what to do with himself after the fact.

darry stood up, and even though he knew it was okay, that he was safe, he felt himself go tense. there was a moment when all three of them felt the weight of what was happening, darry deciding whether or not to yell, soda feeling tears welling in his eyes, and pony sick to his stomach with worry watching the two of them.

darry sighed, his eyes softening, “ponyboy, go get soda a towel, please.”

pony nodded and pushed himself off the floor, taking off down the hall. darry hurried forward and enveloped soda in a rib-cracking hug.

“are you okay?” he asked quietly, his hand rubbing the back of soda’s head, just like their dad used to.

soda nodded quietly.

“honey, you’re soaked…” darry pushed him back to look him over. “why didn’t you call? i’d have come and picked you up from work.”

soda didn’t know where to start. it was time for them to know, and he’d known forever that it was safe to, that it was okay to tell them, but the words always fell flat when he tried to string all the thoughts together.

he was spared the trouble of having to explain himself yet by ponyboy coming back and throwing a warm towel over his shoulders. darry scrubbed his head for a second and muttered, “go dry off and change, you’re gonna get sick.”

soda dragged himself back into his and pony’s bedroom, peeling his wet clothes off and sitting down on the bed, with the towel wrapped around them. he could feel his heart hammering in his throat in a way that had nothing to do with how cold he was. he pulled on a sweatshirt and pajama pants and haphazardly toweled his hair dry, not bothering to run a comb through it or even try to make it look presentable.

darry and ponyboy were on either side of the couch watching tv when he walked back out. he threw his clothes in the dryer and piled in next to pony, who curled up into soda’s side and looked over at darry, waiting patiently for what was coming next.

“i wasn’t at work,” soda started, throwing an arm over pony’s shoulders and tugging him closer. “i was over at steve’s.”

darry tilted his head, “well, why didn’t you just say so, pepsi? steve’s house is no big deal.”

soda sighed deeply, not sure how to approach it gently, “yea… me and steve…”

he couldn’t do it. there was no way he could tell them, not yet. maybe not ever.

unfortunately, pony had caught on immediately. he looked over quickly, “what’s up, soda?”

“what about you and steve?” darry looked over curiously.

shit. he’d noticed, too, there was no going back now, they knew something was happening. it began to occur to him how incapable he was of taking any of it back, how he would never be able to undo it.

“steve and i…” he started, and he had to close his mouth and open it a few times before he could get the words to sound right in his head. “we’re to- he’s…”

soda huffed and pressed his lips together anxiously. pony sat up slightly, his brows furrowed, “it’s okay, take your time.”

“we’re together,” soda spat out, unable to beat around the bush any longer. “he’s my boyfriend.”

there was a palpable silence that hung in the air for almost a full minute after soda spoke, so tense you could cut it with a knife. all any of them could do was stare silently, the only sound being soda’s ragged, terrified breaths.

“that’s all?” darry asked, and soda nodded quickly. “baby, that’s okay! i thought something was wrong!”

soda felt like he could melt into the couch from the relief. he threw himself at darry, his eyes filling with tears as he felt a lump swelling in his throat.

“i thought…” he cried, gripping darry like a lifeline. “i thought you’d be mad.”

“hey,” darry held soda’s face in his hands. “you’re our brother, there is nothing you can do that could make us stop loving you.”

soda gave a heavy sob and darry and pony squeezed him between them.

“you don’t gotta cry,” pony whispered, his hands rubbing up and down soda’s back.

“oh, kiddo,” darry laughed lightly. “i thought you’d known about paul…”

soda sat straight up, his mouth falling open comically, “you… he- paul? seriously? but you were always taking a girl to dances!”

soda let out a loud laugh of delighted incredulity and darry blushed, “a bit of both never hurt anyone… but you already know that, huh?”

soda giggled wetly and wrapped darry in a bone-crushing hug, “thank you.”

“of course, we love you, pepsi,” darry held his little brother close.

darry was never one to hug for long, but soda needed it, needed him. they pulled back after a few moments, and looked over at ponyboy. soda’s heart sank as he realized that there were tears in pony’s eyes, tears that he and darry hadn’t noticed.

“hey, kiddo, what’s the matter?” darry asked quickly, and pony shrugged.

soda did what he did best, he smiled and joked, “you gonna tell us you like boys, too? looks like it might just run in the family.”

pony blinked, and a tear fell from both eyes. he didn’t say anything, just nodded slowly, a high-pitched sob following. they barely gave him a breath before they were both crowding around him and crushing him between them. soda had an inkling that he knew what this was about; pony only ever cried about one thing anymore.

“ponyboy,” soda asked gently, a hand running through pony’s hair. “were you and johnny…?”

“no,” pony gasped out as he shook his head, his breath coming in deep heaves as darry tried to keep him calm. “we weren’t, but i think we’d have gotten there eventually.”

“oh, honey,” soda felt sick to his stomach as he ran a hand over his baby brother’s face and darry tucked pony into himself.

what on earth had this poor kid done to deserve this? losing their parents would have been enough for anyone, but for ponyboy, losing johnny had been like losing half of everything he was. they may not have had it figured out yet, but there had always been more love between the two of them than soda could have felt with anyone, more than darry had with paul or any of the girls he’d taken out in high school. and ponyboy’s person was gone, sad, scared, and in pain.

“it’s okay,” pony sniffled as soda gently tried to wipe away some of the tears.

“no, it’s not,” soda sighed, tear’s prickling in his own eyes. “it’s okay that it’s not. it’s allowed to hurt, baby.”

pony sighed deeply, “thanks for telling us, soda. i guess it does run in the family.”

soda laughed and yanked his little brother into a hug, one that darry joined in on a few moments later. peas in a pod, birds of a feather, nothing would ever come between them, nothing could even if it tried.

#this got kinda angsty at the end what !!!#sodapop curtis #darry curtis #ponyboy curtis #the outsiders #the outsiders fic #star’s writing

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bl-bracket · 2 months ago

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Anyways I was going to make a post about the process of picking bracket topics and whatnot and was trying to come up with some examples of types of topics that would or wouldn't work and for whatever reason I thought of the concept of a "best murderer bracket" and I can't stop thinking about it lmao

it's just like such a funny concept? the idea of fictional murderers battling it out, especially ones from bls (which like I don't think is most people who are not super familiar with the genre as having a lot of characters who have killed people) is just funny in like an absurd way. like abstracting yourself from tumblr and tournament blogs, the idea of telling someone else that there's a tournament going for fictional murderers from east asian mlm tv shows, a genre that for several years was primarily shows about high school and uni students.

anyways that devolved into thinking about it more seriously, and then deciding a more practical way of doing it would to make some kind of directory of bl murderers. which would then lead to a lot of interesting statistical analysis, like characters with highest on screen kill counts, which countries have the highest proportion of fictional killers, etc. you can then make a separate category for characters with implied kills that aren't explicitly shown on screen or vague. and you could track how the number increases over time, which I assume exponentially goes up as more bls are exploring darker and more serious genres.

anyways back to the country stats, I started thinking about what the breakdown would look like so here's my guess based on zero research and just my general knowledge of shows

China. While having very few bls (censored or otherwise), they have a very unfair advantage and that is genre conventions. The 3 biggest Chinese bls I can think of are: The Untamed, Word of Honor, and Guardian. With The Untamed and Word of Honor, the conventions of xianxia and wuxia genres means that there are a lot of characters and almost all of them have killed before (usually nameless canon fodder but still). And then with Guardian, it's a supernatural detective mystery show with murder plots in it and a lot of characters, which again leads to a pretty high kill count. So even only counting these 3 shows, China will probably have the most killers in bl, or at the very least most kills done.

Thailand. It's a numbers game on this one. There's just so many Thai bls and an increasing number of like detective or mafia ones. A show like Kinnporsche has a lot of killers and deaths. Then there's other shows that include a few murderers (but less than Kinnporsche) like The Sign, Manner of Death, 4 Minutes, 3 Will Be Free, Never Let Me Go (Palm did shoot a couple guys dead elt's nto forget), Dead Friend Forever, etc. However the numbers also hurt Thailand in terms of proportions, since there's a lot more Thai bls that don't have murder, so it actually might be 3rd.

Japan. You're not getting much murder from your Cherry Magics and Old Fashion Cupcakes, which is what a significant portion of bl fan's primary exposure to Japanese bl is, but let's not forget that there's a lot of dark Japanese bls where murder is definitely on the table. Now I don't actually have a good gauge of what the numbers on this is, cause I haven't really delved that deep into this corner of the bl market, so I can't make a good estimation but I bet there's more than I'm aware of.

Taiwan. They've got a couple of mafia shows like HIStory 3: Trapped and Kiseki: Dear to Me, both of which have some implied and explicit murder (though less then you would expect if we're honest). That'll give them a few kills and they also have a relatively smaller pool of shows to pull from, meaning percentage wise it's a bit higher.

South Korea. Ok I am far from an expert of bls from South Korea, but unless there's like obscure short films I'm not aware of, the only drama I can think of from here with kills is Long Time No See? or I guess The Director Who Buys Me Dinner has like 1.5 murders? anyways Korea also has a not insignificant amount of bls to their name so proportionally it will be quite low.

The Philippines. Out of all the countries on this list, I am least familiar with the bls from here, but from what I've gathered during my routine mdl searches, basically all of them seem to be murder-free (unless of course there's some shocking plot twists in them)

anyways I'll probably never do this project just cause it would require a lot of time and collaborative effort and I've got a lot irl going on right now (hence why the submission period for most whipped is so long lol) and also have some other projects I'm already planning on doing so I don't really have time to do it. but I wanted to tell y'all about my thoughts on the matter.

also sorry if this is the weirdest thing I've ever posted. kinda had a major stress breakdown today but then resolved it relatively quickly cause I realized I could just reschedule the life altering appointment that was causing the breakdown lmao so I'm in a strange frame of mind lol

#not a poll #like I was walking around looking like some haunted peasant from a dostoevsky novel #and then suddenly was like wait can I reschedule #and I could #and then I thought about this and then made this post #and here we are #get ready for strange posting over the next couple months as high stress levels with a pretty decent dosage of psychiatric meds combine int #unhinged ramblings about bls lol

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