#can't you add titles on text posts anymore or do i just not know how to use tumblr app
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HA
HAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA
IT TOOK 1 MONTH 3 RECOVERY ATTEMPTS AND 6 YEARS OF BEING LOCKED OUT
BUT I FINALLY
FINALLY
RECOVERED ACCESS TO MY TUMBLR
#THIS WAS TUMBLR USER HARUMAKOTOKYO#SORRY I REBRANDED BACK TO MY OG BRAND AS SOON AS I GOT IN AGAIN#not that it rly matters lmao idek who on this blog still even knows me 🥲#i literally haven't been here since 2016#i still know how to naturally use tumblr tags as god intended at least#coury's boring life#can't you add titles on text posts anymore or do i just not know how to use tumblr app#i literally never used tumblr app before in my life bc the last time i was on tumblr i didn't even have a smartphone yet
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Someone asked me how to get started with writing in the comments of a fic.
I know I don't have huge following on Tumblr, but I felt like sharing it here anyway, it might help someone:
The first one is always the hardest. Did you ever hear of NaNoWriMo? It's what started me writing in earnest, even if it has it's pitfalls. Otherwise, my wise advices would be: 1) don't get stuck on quality, quantity or rules! Just write what makes you happy. Fanfic is a happy playground, and there is sure to be at least one person on Ao3 with the same tastes as you! 2) consider setting a routine. I write half an hour every day. (Well, mostly. Sometimes I cheat a little bit.) I installed Focus Writer for that, it has a daily goal function to keep track of your advancement, where I set 30 minutes instead of a word count. I like seeing the little grid fill up with little blue stars as the counter for longest successful streak raises. 3) You're there to have fun! If you don't have fun anymore, consider what annoys you, and find a way to remove it: You hate the transition? Skip it. You never do the full half hour, and it's discouraging you? Lower your writing time to 15 minutes and enjoy the easier wins! You get discouraged because you only post every week? decide to post whatever you've written daily no matter the wordcount. You can't find new chapter titles? Don't add them in. You can't do the summaries? Either put in an extract of your text that you find well written and poignant instead, or just don't put a summary in (that one is better on the chapter summaries. Try to put at least an extract in the work as a whole, it really helps with exposure) You don't know what to tag? Put the ones you tend to search for and put an author's note saying that you welcome tag suggestions in the comment.
Just. Have fun. It's much easier to want to do the things we find fun
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I've been dying for someone to ask me this!
For starters - just know what works for me may not work for you, but it also might just - right?
I'm also thinking of starting a study tips guide - so the momentum of this post will help me decide that too <🩵
Highlighting and underlining any new terms and googling them - then adding an annotation on the side which explains them in your words
Try making flash cards of these terms
To memorise parts of a scholarly essay/theory chapters - first draw an outline of everything in it, like literally split it into the major themes like for example - electrostatics can be broken down into coulomb's law, dielectrics, electric field, electric dipole - so on and so forth.
After you've made a rough outline - break it further down for example under coulomb's law you can add all it's subheadings - the experiment,derivation, vector forms, graphs etcetera
Now you have a to do list to completely understand the scholarly essay - so now you pick a topic and now magic happens (cause this works like magic)
You pick a topic - make a further smaller to do list (I call this the miniest to do list) of *each* and that means every single keyword,term, derivation you must remember and now you follow this (this really helps if you really struggle to understand how much you've actually done). Try making a pen paper list because it helps you like physically process/focus.
Now time for fairy dust, something I like to call the "Tinkerbell Method" - Set a pomodoro or any timer for 25/30 minutes (The pomodoro technique is especially helpful for neurospicy folk like myself), keep a bright lamp over the text(if its physical) or keep your reading device on a decent brightness, also keep google on hand (If you keep your phone on focus mode/DND, you can opt out of keeping google as an app in the list of selected blocked apps in the settings.) Now you start reading.
If its a purely scholarly article - start with understanding the title and abstract, do not make the mistake of reading it like a textbook - a textbook begins with a glossary and tries its best to explain from the ground up - a scholarly article assumes you have some knowledge - so please do keep underlining and annotating whatever terms/laws/keywords you are not familiar with. A secret to understand especially scientifc articles well is reading the conclusion and going through the diagrams first - it helps in actually understanding what the article is trying to teach you.
If its a textbook, they generally have subheadings, which should be in your miniest to do list (the one you make to focus, and that should be somewhere physically) . Underline, highlight and annotate your way to glory! Google any term you don't understand completely and write it in your own terms.
Another quick trick - blurting! Once you've googled something, annotated and you still can't memorise/recall it - this method of active recall really helps. You can even try it with flash cards.
After this, if you still can't recall terms - I have two options - flash cards in a quiz format or taping.
Flash cards - Ask someone to ask you questions, or try uploading your flash cards to a quiz site. You can also ask chatgpt to make random questions for you on the terms/keywords you've studied. A small tip - try this in the first week you study a topic, helps a lot in retention and in clearing concept clarity.
Taping - One of my personal favourites these days, you hide certain portions of your notes/annotations/textbook/article and try to remember what's written there - think of those times when you try to remember the answer but can only recall the page number, or how you highlighted it - this will help your active recall!
There is honestly way more where that came from - so feel free to ask for anymore help!
All the best, keep slaying <3
does anyone have any hacks for how to actually read scholarly stuff & absorb it?
i'm trying to read these essays & stuff in a class i'm really interested in yet i can't physically focus on it enough to actually process what's going on
#dark acadamia aesthetic#girls in stem#stemblr#studyblr#science#womeninengineering#dark academia#stem#studyblr community#study motivation#studygram#study notes#study blog#studyspo#studying#student life#study aesthetic#university#studywithme#study tips#study inspiration#tips#scholarly academia#academia#chaotic academia#academics#chaotic academic aesthetic#women in stem#stem academia#stem student
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if you can live your life without an audience, you should do it.
The Truman Show // MAG188 - Centre of Attention // Twitter: TubboLive // Can't Handle This (Kanye Rant) - Bo Burnham // Wilbur Soot VOD (Oct 17th 2020) - [DreamSMP] Speedy Stream Festival What festival // MAG117 - Testament // Margaret Atwood - The Robber Bride // @elytrians // MAG188 - Centre of Attention // The Truman Show (edit by @parakeet) // Untitled #15 by @that-house // something about a truman show complex, greek heroes, and the illusion of free will. by @yuker // Tom Stoppard - Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead // Bo Burnham - Inside // you're fairly certain there's a curtain somewhere by @irrealisms
[IDs under cut]
Images 1 and 2: Screenshots of the Truman Show. The Closed Captions read "Let me get you some help, Truman. You're not well."
Image 3: ARCHIVIST: Hm. You want a show so badly? Fine.
Image 4: a twitter poll by @TubboLive. text of the tweet is "What do we do..." Options are "Exile Tommy", with 55.8% of the vote, and "Don't Exile Tommy", with 44.2% of the vote.
Image 5: The truth is, my biggest problem's you/I want to please you/But I want to stay true to myself/I want to give you the night out that you deserve/But I want to say what I think/And not care what you think about it/Part of me loves you/Part of me hates you/Part of me needs you/Part of me fears you/And I don't think that I can handle this right now"
Image 6: WILBUR: You're saying "do it", chat, but you're-- this isn't-- you aren't affected, you just want to see explosions, you guys aren't affected, I understand, I understand, I-- I've been hasty.
Image 7: TIM: All right. I don’t know what you are, I don’t even know if you’re listening. I don’t care. Just, if you’re there, I want you to know that I hate you. I hate you for, for witnessing what’s happened to us.
Image 8: “Male fantasies, male fantasies, is everything run by male fantasies? Up on a pedestal or down on your knees, it's all a male fantasy: that you're strong enough to take what they dish out, or else too weak to do anything about it. Even pretending you aren't catering to male fantasies is a male fantasy: pretending you're unseen, pretending you have a life of your own, that you can wash your feet and comb your hair unconscious of the ever-present watcher peering through the keyhole, peering through the keyhole in your own head, if nowhere else. You are a woman with a man inside watching a woman. You are your own voyeur.” ― Margaret Atwood, The Robber Bride
Image 9: a tumblr post by @elytrians. text: *coughs up blood* how do i look? do i look good? was that hot?
Image 10: She had once counted how many times she could spot a camera watching her during her morning run: thirty-one in ten minutes. At least, it had been back then. Last time she had tried it there were hundreds. They tracked her movements, and made so much noise she could not have ignored them if she tried. It was halfway between the mechanical whir of a focusing lens and the low rattle of mean-spirited laughter. Carmen didn’t go running anymore.
Image 11: The last scene of the Truman Show, edited to add a twitch chat full of PogChamp emotes.
Image 12: a comic of two squares talking. RED: I realized something. BLUE: Yeah? RED: This comic could just end. Without warning. The Creator could just get bored. BLUE: No closure, no catharsis, nothing. RED: Our recent few strips would make for unsatisfying ends. Maybe we should give every comic a satisfying conclusion. BLUE: But that’s life. Life doesn’t always have a satisfying ending. RED: This isn’t life, this is a comic. We can control it. We can make sure there’s a happy ending. BLUE: We can’t control jack shit. The comic’s ending is up to the Creator.
Image 13: a comic of Technoblade. He is sitting amongst scattered papers with his hands on his face. The scattered papers have the titles of various Technoblade DSMP Youtube videos written on them. Text on the image reads: “It can hurt, knowing you’re just a character with predetermined lines instead of a person with feelings. The voices are the audience and they’re constantly critiquing your performance.”
Image 14: ROS: I wish I was dead. (Considers the drop.) I could jump over the side. That would put a spoke in their wheel. GUIL: Unless they're counting on it. ROS: I shall remain on board. That'll put a spoke in their wheel. (The futility of it, fury.) All right! We don't question, we don't doubt. We perform.
Images 15, 16: Bo Burnham stands outside a house on a stage; there is a spotlight on him. the caption is [disembodied applause] He tries to reenter the house. the caption is [disembodied laughter].
Image 17: WILBUR: It’s better to play along. Give them what they want. Put on a show. Who cares who it hurts, as long as it’s fucking—influential? God, I hate it so much sometimes, I want to scream. And then I think, would they like that? Would that be entertaining enough for them? Still have to give them their performance. Even when I was dead I was still—I rehearsed my resurrection. TECHNO: Dude, you need therapy.
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Azriel + his Shadows
There seems to be a big debate within this fandom when it comes to Azriel and his shadows. Why this is even a debate is beyond me but I digress. In this meta, I am going to pinpoint all of Azriel and his shadows' interactions. It is very important to note that Azriel's shadows are a separate entity. They are not him. Moving on.
Quick little disclaimers:
1. This is going to be a long post.
2. You will notice that certain characters do, in fact, have a bigger emphasis on Azriel and his shadows vanishing (which is not a bad thing).
3. This is my interpretation of the shadows based on the context of the text. I also included the chapters if you so choose to read the quotes in context as well.
Some key terminology that, unfortunately, needs to be defined:
Cleared: rid of objects or obstructions
Stark: severe or bare in appearance or outline
Disappear: cease to be visible
Eddied: move in a circular way
Recoil: suddenly spring or flinch back in fear, horror, and disgust.
Skitter: to move lightly and quickly or hurriedly
These definitions will also be present among the text once it is noted.
BACKGROUND ON AZRIEL
"Shadowsinger. Yes- the title, whatever it meant, seemed to fit.
"Like the daemati," Rhys said to me, "shadowsingers are rare- coveted by courts and territories across the world for their stealth and predisposition to hear and feel things others can't."
Perhaps those shadows were indeed whispering to him, then. Azriel's cold face yielded nothing. (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
"A new bastard in the camp- and an untrained shadowsinger to boot. Not to mention he couldn't even fly thanks to-" (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
"I don't really know where I fit in anymore," I admitted [...]
"I've been alive almost five and a half centuries, and I'm not sure of that, either,' Azriel said." (ACOMAF, Chapter 22)
But Azriel, locked in his father's dungeons like some criminal until he was eleven, denied the ability to fly, to fight, to do anything his Illyrian instincts screamed at him to do... (ACOWAR, Chapter 18)
A corner of Azriel's mouth curled up, the shadows about him sliding over his neck like living tattoos, twins to the Illyrian ones marked beneath his leathers.
Shadows different from anything my powers summoned, spoke to. Born in a lightless, airless prison meant to break him.
Instead, he had learned its language. (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
I held his gaze, though. Held that ice-cold stare that still sometimes scared the shit out of me. I'd seen what he'd done to his half bothers centuries ago. Still dreamed of it. The act itself wasn't what lingered. Every bit of it had been deserved. Every damn bit. (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
Based on these excerpts from the books, we know that Azriel was not born with his shadows and his shadowsinging abilities. He acquired them when he was living in darkness and fear. They provided him company during his time of loneliness. He learned their language. They became his friends. They brought him comfort and provided him a defense mechanism when needed. They are not him.
It is important to realize that while Azriel's shadows are not him, they sense his emotions. While Azriel learned the language of wind and stone, the shadows, in turn, learned how to read Azriel's language and emotions and act upon them.
Side note: I'm going to go ahead and add this little jewel as well, just for fun:
Rhys said to Azriel, "If I had not met a shadowsinger, I would not have known that it is the family you make, not the one you are born into, that matters. I would not have known what it is to truly hope, even when the world tells you to despair." Azriel bowed his head in thanks. (ACOWAR, Chapter 69)
INNER CIRCLE
Let's start with conversations amongst the Inner Circle. We know that the IC is Azriel's family (see quote above) and he trusts them. We see throughout the books that not only are there calm conversations but there are also tense ones as well.
The gift of a violent, warmongering people," Amren added. Azriel nodded, shadows wreathing his neck, his wrists. Cassian gave him a sharp look, face tightening, but Azriel ignored him.(ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
This is Feyre's first time meeting the Inner Circle at the House of Wind. Feyre is getting the basic background of all of the members and we see from the quote above, Feyre is getting the background of Cassian, Azriel, and Rhys's heritage. This is where we first get a hint about Azriel's hatred for his own people. The way his shadows start to swarm him. They sense his hatred and disdain for Illyrians and they swarm to protect.
... I scrambled for something to ask and said to Azriel, those shadows gone again, "How did you- I mean, how do you and Lord Cassian-" (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
We then see his shadows disappear. In context of this quote, Cassian makes a light-hearted joke when it comes to looking good while wearing the Siphons. Cassian's sense of humor helps ease Azriel and his disdain for Illyrians that was reemerging at the time.
(1) Azriel lingered by the window, comfortably ensconced in shadow, a light flurry of snow dusting the lawn and street behind him. And Amren... (ACOMAF, Chapter 19)
(2)... Azriel emerged from his wreathing shadows to ask the most questions; his face and voice remained unreadable. (ACOMAF, Chapter 19)
This quote (1), in context, presents the fact that both Azriel and Cassian were waiting for Rhys and Feyre to return from the prison. Not only is Azriel surrounded by his shadows, but Cassian also expresses "a coiled-up energy" while waiting. Both Azriel and Cassian present the same emotions when it comes to Rhys/Feyre and the prison. While Azriel's facial expressions remain unreadable, his shadows make it known what he's feeling (2).
I assumed Azriel was nearby, seeking sanctuary in the shadows. Hopefully, he'd gotten some rest after dealing with the Attor- and would rest a bit more before heading into the mortal realm to spy on those queens. (ACOMAF, Chapter 28)
Here we now have Feyre associating Azriel with his shadows. She has, for most of the time, seen them surrounding him. "Seeking sanctuary" is an interesting word choice because it shows that she also sees that Azriel uses his shadows for sanctuary.
We searched, but the missed arrows had been snatched up by our attackers- and even the shadows and wind told Azriel nothing, as if our enemy had been hidden from them as well. (ACOMAF, Chapter 42)
This is one of our first indications that Azriel's shadows essentially work for him. They spy for him, they hunt for him. They work for him. So, not only do his shadows read his emotions, they're essentially his employees.
Azriel, his face a mask of beautiful death, silently promised them all endless, unyielding torment, even the shadows shuddering in his wake. I knew why; knew for whom he'd gladly do it. (ACOMAF, Chapter 42)
The Hewn City. A disturbing and evil place that Azriel (along with the Inner Circle) clearly hates. In this quote, it's very clear Azriel is pissed- mainly for the fact that Keir, Mor's father, is the Steward for the Hewn City. His shadows are, again, reacting to his rage that he has for Keir and the Hewn City in general.
Within a heartbeat, Azriel had vanished into shadows and was gone. Keir didn't even turn. (ACOMAF, Chapter 42)
Our indication that not only do the shadows read his emotions, protect him, and work for him, they're also a means of quick transportation.
"He remains alive," Azriel answered, shadows curling around the clawed tips of his wings, so stark against the snow beneath our boots. "So do the others." (ACOWAR, Chapter 13)
This scene takes place right after Azriel and Cassian rescue Feyre and Lucien from Eris and his brothers. The shadows surround Azriel while speaking about Eris, whom we all know he does not like.
Cassian took up a place against the banister, crossing his arms with an arrogance I knew meant trouble. Azriel remained beside me, shadows wreathing his knuckles. As if battling High Lords' sons was how they usually spent their days. (ACOWAR, Chapter 14)
Back in Velaris after rescuing Feyre and Lucien from Eris and Co. Yet again, still pissed.
Cassian gave her a vulgar gesture that made Lucien choke on his green beans. "I was a young Illyrian and didn't know better," he said, then pointed his fork at Azriel. "Don't try to blend into the shadows. You said the same thing."
"He did not," Mor said, and the shadows that Azriel had indeed been subtly weaving around himself vanished. [...] (ACOWAR, Chapter 17)
This scene is a good way to show that the Inner Circle knows and is aware that Azriel does, in fact, use his shadows to hide. In this scene, Cassian acknowledges that Azriel begins to hide when talking about a joke amongst the boys referring to wanting more women within the group to "look at all day". Then we have Mor, who speaks up to defend Azriel and his shadows vanish. Mor makes him comfortable in an uncomfortable moment.
Azriel shook his head, shadows twining around his wrists. "It's not the same. When you're older, the fears, the mental blocks... it's different."
None of them, not even Amren, said anything. (ACOWAR, Chapter 18)
Azriel offers to help Feyre with flying. Whenever talking about his childhood and/or Illyrians, the shadows make an appearance. A source of comfort for him when talking about something he despises. The entire IC is aware of his past and feelings towards it; so much so that it's emphasized that Amren doesn't even say anything.
As the shadows wreathing him cleared, Azriel sized up Nesta and Cassian, then threw a vaguely sympathetic look in my direction. "I need to start our lesson early." (ACOWAR, Chapter 19)
Azriel appears at the HoW to pick up Feyre for their first flying lesson. With his amusement of the banter between Nesta and Cassian, along with the fact that Rhys sent Azriel to "rescue" Feyre from it, we see the shadow around him disappear.
Cleared: rid of objects or obstructions
Disappear: cease to be visible
Too far- this was pushing them both too far. I tried to catch Cassian's gaze but he was monitoring them closely, his golden-brown skin unnaturally pale. Azriel's shadows gathered close, half veiling him from view. (ACOWAR, Chapter 27)
After the Hewn City, Mor finds out that Azriel knew about Rhys working with Eris. Mor feeling betrayed by both Azriel and Rhys makes Azriel angry and uncomfortable. He wants to hide from it all.
"Call off your dog," Amren said with the lethal tone.
Because the shadow in the corner behind Amren... that was Azriel. The obsidian hilt of Truth-Teller in his scarred hand. He'd moved without my realizing it- though I had no doubt the others had likely been aware. (ACOWAR, Chapter 27)
Duty calls, even when it's against someone like Amren. A heated discussion when Amren found out the Feyre went to the Bone Carver to ask about the Ouroboros mirror. Amren is clearly pissed about it and, to protect his High Lord and Lady, Azriel moved behind Amren via his shadows.
And as if he'd summoned him, Azriel stepped out of a pocket of shadow by the stairs and scanned us from head to toe. His eyes lingered on the blood crusting Rhys's hands. (ACOWAR, Chapter 32)
Another example of how Azriel uses his shadows as means of transportation. He was guarding the townhouse with Elain inside after Feyre and Nesta were attacked in the library.
Azriel, wreathed in shadows by the front door, chuckled quietly. Cassian shot him a glare. "I don't see you spouting poetry, brother."
Azriel crossed his arms, still smiling faintly. "I don't need to resort to it." (ACOWAR, Chapter 41)
Before the High Lords meeting in Dawn. Tensions with the upcoming meeting and war are high but that still doesn't stop friendly banter between the IC.
Azriel instantly vanished. First to arrive- first to see if any trap awaited. (ACOWAR, Chapter 41)
Spymaster duty calls. More means of transportation.
Azriel squeezed, Eris thrashing beneath him. No physical brawling- there had been a rule against that, but Azriel, with whatever power those shadows gave him...
"Enough, Azriel," Rhys ordered. Perhaps those shadows that now slid and eddied around the shadowsinger hid him from the wrath of the binding magic. The others made no move to interfere, as if wondering the same.
Azriel dug his knee- and all his weight- into Eris's gut. He was silent, utterly silent as he ripped the air from Eris's body. Beron's flames struck the blue shield, over and over, but the fire skittered off and fizzled out on the water. Any that escaped were torn to shred by shadows. (ACOWAR, Chapter 45)
Not only does it seem as if Azriel’s shadows have more power than just hiding/comfort/spying, but they seem to be giving into Azriel’s wrath towards Eris while, all at the same time, hiding him and destroying the flames that managed to escape the shield from his Siphons.
Eddied: move in a circular way
Azriel's eyes slid to Eris, the High Lord's son panting beneath him. And the shadowsinger leaned down to whisper something in his ear that made Eris blanch further.
But the shield dropped. The shadows lightened into sunshine. (ACOWAR, Chapter 45)
Azriel is done attacking. He drops his shields. His shadows lighten but don’t disappear. What a guy.
(1) But I looked to Azriel, currently leaning against the wall beside the floor-to-ceiling window, shadows fluttering around him. Even the birds in their cages nearby remained silent. (ACOWAR, Chapter 47)
(2) I frowned at the birds in cages throughout the room, still silent in Azriel's shadowy presence. (ACOWAR, Chapter 47)
(3) Azriel barely spoke, those shadows still perched on his shoulders. Mor barely looked at him. (ACOWAR, Chapter 47)
After the disaster of a High Lord/Lady meeting, Azriel is fuming. His shadows are providing him comfort and ease while he doesn’t involve himself with the rest of the Inner Circle.
Still fuming, still brooding. Azriel hasn’t moved from his position by the window. What’s also worth mentioning, as well as with the previous quote, is that the birds in the bird cages turn silent and stay silent in Azriel’s presence.
Azriel, shadows wafting from his shoulders and trailing at his feet, ignored him as he passed. The shadowsinger hadn't shown a flicker of emotion, however, to Mor when he'd met us in the foyer. (ACOWAR, Chapter 48)
After the High Lord/Lady meeting and after Mor's one-night stand with Helion. Azriel, and literally everyone there for that matter, saw what was going on between Mor and Helion, saw them leave together. Needless to say, he's probably a combination of angry, confused, and hurt.
I closed my eyes. During that time, I'd have to get across the battlefield before us, find wherever he kept the Cauldron.
"My shadows are hunting for it," Azriel said to me, reading my face as I opened my eyes. His jaw clenched at the words. He was supposed to be searching for it himself. He flared and settled his wings, as if testing them. "But the wards are strong- no doubt reinforced by the king after you shredded through his at the camp. You might have to go on foot. Wait until the slaughter starts getting sloppy." (ACOWAR, Chapter 69)
This is a perfect example of how Azriel’s shadows basically work for him. While he is with Feyre during the battle, he has his shadows scouting around, looking for the Cauldron. Even his shadows are unable to locate the Cauldron based on the wards that the King placed on them.
"I can fight on foot," Azriel said to Rhys.
"No." There was no arguing with that tone.
Azriel seemed like he was debating it, but Amren shook her head in warning and he backed down, shadows coiling at his fingers. (ACOWAR, Chapter 69)
Azriel is wanting to fight and Rhys is refusing to let him do so. Not to mention that it even takes Amren giving Azriel a warning not to go against Rhys’s orders. Clearly, Azriel isn’t too happy about it with his shadows surrounding his fingers.
Amren snorted, and we fell into flanking positions around my sisters. A glamour of invisibility would hopefully allow us to skirt the southern edge of the battlefield- along with Azriel's shadows as he monitored from behind. But once we got behind enemy lines… (ACOWAR, Chapter 70)
Another example of how Azriel’s shadows not only work for him, but are separate from him. Feyre and Amren are escorting Nesta and Elain to get to the other side of the battlefield. Azriel, talking to Rhys and Eris about their plans, sends some of his shadows as means of protection/invisibility for the group on the move.
Feyre cleared her throat. "All right, Az. Let's hear it."
Azriel folded his wings, shadows writhing around his ankles and neck. "Queen Briallyn has been busier than we thought, but not in the way we expected." (ACOSF, Chapter 20)
It’s very typical for Azriel’s shadows to be present when he’s discussing tense topics and situations with the Inner Circle. Talking about his recent spying missions about Briallyn, we learn that, in the context of the book, he had to torture the information out of many people. Although we know that Azriel literally tortures people for a living, it still doesn’t make the situation any less tense for him to discuss.
Then Rhys inhaled sharply, his body full of movement again. Azriel asked, his own shadows gathering at his shoulders, "What happened?" (ACOSF, Chapter 29)
Nesta’s nightmare that causes the entire House to shake and bring Rhys to help bring her out of it. When Nesta slips into unconsciousness, what the three brothers witnessed strains them. Azriel is not the only one who is surrounded by his own shadows. Rhys’s own are surrounding him as well.
(1) Feyre slid into the seat beside his, but Cassian, Rhys, and Az remained standing, the shadowsinger leaning against a pillar, half-hidden from sight. Feyre asked, "Are the soldiers enchanted?" (ACOSF, Chapter 41)
(2) "Just the Harp remains at large, then," Azriel said. He remained leaning against the pillar, swathed in shadows. (ACOSF, Chapter 41)
Discussions about the Autumn Court soldiers that were in the Oorid that Cassian and Azriel took with Helion, along with discussing the Dread Trove objects. Typical that Azriel makes his presence known, all while at the same time being hidden as well. What a guy.
Azriel stepped forward, shadows trailing from his shoulders. "Kallias, Tarquin, and Helion might be willing to kneel. Thesan will kneel if the others do." (ACOSF, Chapter 42)
Amren discusses with Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel about Gwydion and Narben, along with discussing the possibility of Rhys becoming High King (ew, no. I hate any High King talk). This is also the same time that the brothers are ‘messing’ with the weapons that Nesta made; dangerous weapons that they were advised not to touch (typical).
RHYS
The argument with Rhys this morning had been swift and brutal: Azriel insisted he could fly- fight with the legions, as they'd planned. Rhys refused. Cassian refused. Azriel threatened to slip into shadow and fight anyway. Rhys merely said that if he so much as tried, he'd chain him to a tree. (ACOWAR, Chapter 69)
After Azriel went to the Hybern camp to rescue Elain, he came out extremely injured. Because of this, Rhys felt the need to pull rank and order Azriel to stay on the ground and not fight. We know that Azriel is loyal but this is one of the examples that shows that when it’s something that’s important to him, pulling rank goes only so far. The ability for Azriel to “slip into shadow” is not only a means of transportation but a way to go against Rhys’ orders.
One glance at Azriel's unreadable face and I added, "Don't bother to answer that."
A corner of Azriel's mouth curled up, the shadows about him sliding over his neck like living tattoos, twins to the Illyrian ones marked beneath his leathers. (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
There are times we see Azriel’s shadows disappear around members for the IC. With that being said, when certain topics are being discussed, topics that do not sit well with Azriel, he is surrounded by his shadows. With this conversation with Rhys, they are talking about a potential Illyrian uprising. Here, Rhys makes a comparison about Azriel’s almost-constant shadows being almost like tattoos.
"The Illyrians are pieces of shit," he said too quietly.
I opened my mouth and shut it.
Shadows gathered around his wings, trailing off him and onto the thick rug. "They train and train as warriors, and yet when they don't come home, their families make us into villains for sending them to war?"
"Their families have lost something irreplaceable," I said carefully.
Azriel waved a scarred hand, his cobalt Siphon glinting with the movement as his fingers cut through the air. "They're hypocrites." (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
Still talking about Illyrians, whom Azriel very much hates. He’s surrounded by his shadows when it comes to topics like this; in this case, his hatred for the Illyrians. Like, he really fucking hates them so I think Azriel is the last person who would help “fix” Illyria. He would rather watch it burn.
"Send Lucien, then. As our human emissary."
I studied the tenseness in Azriel's shoulders, the shadows veiling half of him from the sunlight. "Lucien is away right now."
Az's brow rose. "Where?"
I winked at him. "You're my spymaster. Shouldn't you know?"
Az crossed his arms, face as elegant and cold as the legendary dagger at his side. "I don't make a point of looking after his movements."
"Why?"
Not a flicker of emotion. "He is Elain's mate."
I waited.
"It would be an invasion of her privacy to track him."
To know when and if Lucien sought her out. What they did together.
"You sure about that?" I asked quietly. (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
Azriel gets tense and hides half of himself in his shadows when Rhys brings up Lucien. This is clearly a conversation that Azriel doesn’t enjoy and we see that it is because Lucien is Elain’s mate and he not only respects her privacy, but does not want to see if Elain and Lucien have any type of interactions with each other.
"You mean to tell me that you weren't bluffing when you said you didn't track Lucien's every movement?"
Nothing. Absolutely nothing on that face, on his scent. The shadows, whatever the hell they were, hid too well. Too much. Azriel only said coldly, "If Lucien kills Graysen, then good riddance." (ACOFAS, Chapter 7)
Two things come to mind with this quote.
One: Azriel really does not enjoy talking about anything Lucien and Graysen related because his shadows are surrounding him during these specific discussions. (Azriel basically says that Grayson can just drop dead- love that.)
Two: his shadows are known for hiding him in tense situations but with this quote, his shadows also hide Azriel’s scent. Not only is hiding your scent important for a Spymaster, but does he hide his scent around others as well? (I love this man)
"Azriel nodded his agreement, his shadows twining around him. Most of the camp women had ducked into their homes when he'd appeared.
A rare visit from the shadowsinger. Both myth and terror. Az looked just as displeased to be here, but he'd come when I asked." (ACOFAS, Chapter 26)
Talks about the upcoming Blood Rite with Rhys and Cassian. Azriel is willing to interfere with the Blood Rite in order to kill Kallon. (Again, he doesn’t give a shit about Illyrians, being Illyrian, and their traditions) While in Illyria, he’s constantly surrounded by shadows due to his hatred for his heritage. Rare for him to show up, but since he is loyal to Rhys, to an extent, he would go if asked.
FEYRE
A wisp of shadow curled around Azriel's ear, and his eyes snapped to mine. I schooled my face into bland innocence. (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
The first time Feyre meets the entire IC, she notices Azriel’s shadows, as anyone would have. She also notices that they seem to disappear whenever Mor is around. In this quote, we see one of Azriel’s shadows essentially alert him that he is being watched as he immediately looks at Feyre when his shadow whispers into his ear.
The spymaster had waited in silence. I tried not to look too uncomfortable as he scooped me into his arms, those shadows that whispered to him stroking my neck, my cheek. (ACOMAF, Chapter 22)
Going to the human lands to see her sisters, Feyre requests to be flown by Azriel. While not quite comfortable in Feyre’s presence yet, along with the need to be on alert when it comes to flying over lands, his shadows surround them both. Feyre makes note that the shadows whisper to him, implying there’s a language between only Azriel and the shadows.
Another impact struck the ice behind us. Shadows skittered in its wake. Azriel. (ACOWAR, Chapter 13)
Rescuing Feyre and Lucien from Eris and his brothers. As we see, more shadows. He’s pissed, Especially since it’s now known that Feyre is not only Rhys’s mate but also their High Lady.
"In the blinding sun off the turquoise water, his shadows were gone, his face stark and clear. More... human than I had ever seen him." (ACOWAR, Chapter 29)
Probably one of my favorite quotes about Azriel. During a break from Feyre’s training lesson, Feyre sees that the shadows are gone and Azriel’s face is clear. With the mention of him looking “more human” it is meant to show the reader that Azriel, just like the rest of these characters, carry burdens. Whether it be war, heartache, and/or feeling lost, they have them. In this scene, Azriel’s shadows are gone and his face shows that at the moment, he’s not burdened by his internal and external battles.
Stark: severe or bare in appearance or outline
Azriel had made us invisible- shadow-bound.
We sprinted between tents, feet flying over the grass and dirt. "Hurry," he whispered. "The shadows won't last long." (ACOWAR, Chapter 65)
During the rescue of Elain, dawn is approaching and Azriel knows that all of his shadows won’t last in the sunlight. Since he is making them invisible, it would be difficult to continue that in the light of day.
MOR
Both Illyrians turned toward her, Cassian bracing his feet slightly farther apart on the floor in a fighting stance I knew too well.
It was almost enough to distract me from noticing Azriel as those shadows lightened, and his gaze slid over Mor's body… (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
When Feyre first meets Azriel, she instantly notices how his shadows lighten and almost disappear in the presence of Mor. We later find out that Azriel has been in love with her for the past five centuries. This shows that whenever Mor is around, he gets put at ease.
Mor patted Azriel on the shoulder as she dodged his outstretched wing. "Relax Az- no fighting tonight. We promised Rhys."
The lurking shadows vanished entirely as Azriel's head dipped a bit- his night-dark hair sliding over his handsome face as if to shield him from that mercilessly beautiful grin. (ACOMAF, Chapter 16)
Any thought about Mor, any touch from Mor, causes Azriel’s shadows to completely vanish. His shadows have learned Azriel’s emotions and language, therefore, know when they are needed and when they’re not.
Yes- Azriel, who kept a step away, whose shadows trailed him and seemed to fade in her presence. (ACOMAF, Chapter 22)
Mor is telling Feyre her backstory and mentions Cassian and Azriel. Everyone associated Azriel with his shadows but in the short time of knowing him, Feyre is able to acknowledge that when his shadows fade in Mor’s presence, they have history. We later find out that that history is him being in love with her for so many years.
Shadows curled around Azriel's shoulders, whispering in his ear as he stared down Eris. (ACOWAR, Chapter 26)
Knowing the history that Mor, Eris, and Azriel share, Azriel is always on edge and angry when it comes to Eris. Azriel was even willing to challenge Eris in a dual for what was done to Mor. His shadows swarm him as they whisper to him, a form of comfort in a tense situation.
CASSIAN
Cassian was trying. Azriel had lunged into the fray, nothing more than shadows edged in blue light, battling his way toward where Cassian fought, utterly surrounded. (ACOWAR, Chapter 56)
During the battle with Hybern, Azriel uses his shadows to fight and move as he tries to get closer to Cassian, to reform the lines.
Cassian hadn't told anyone about the step he'd found with the clear finger holes burned into it. He wondered if Azriel had somehow learned of them, the news brought to him on his shadows' whispers. (ACOSF, Chapter 22)
Another good quote to show that the shadows give news to Azriel about things that he doesn’t specifically see for himself. He’s a spymaster. Not only does he get his information from his own eyes, but he uses his shadows to gain the information as well.
"I thought I'd do some training myself before heading out for the day," Az said, his shadows lingering in the archway, as if fearful of the bright sunlight in the ring. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" (ACOSF, Chapter 23)
As we know, Azriel’s shadows tend to sometimes disappear in the sunlight but not always (see quote below). Azriel seems to be perfectly fine with his shadows lingering in the archway. He’s not concerned about it so why are you? Moving on.
"Where have you been exercising these days?'
"Here," Azriel said. "At night." After he returned from spying on their enemies.
"Can't sleep?" Cassian took up a fighting stance.
A shadow curled around Azriel's neck, the only one brave enough to face the sunlight. "Something like that," he said, and settled into his own stance across from Cassian.
Cassian let it drop, knowing Az would have told him already if he'd wanted to share what had been hounding him enough to exercise at night, rather than in the morning with them. (ACOSF, Chapter 23)
Here, Cassian is questioning Azriel about his training and why he now tends to train at night. Something (Elain) is weighing on Azriel’s mind so he uses training at night as an outlet. That being said, going back to how his shadows provide comfort to him when he’s feeling down, a shadow of his is “braving the sunlight” to provide a little bit of comfort to Azriel as Cassian brings up this topic.
The air parted, and Azriel appeared at his heels, unsteady and bobbing, but flying. Darkness rose behind them, confirmation that Az wielded his shadows to hide their captives. (ACOSF, Chapter 34)
As Azriel and Cassian leave after fighting with Autumn Court soldiers, Azriel uses his shadows to hide them from anyone who might find them, until he can get back to them for questioning.
"I think the better question is if Eris is still alive," Azriel murmured, shadows whispering in his ear. "I can't get a read on it." (ACOSF, Chapter 67)
As we read ACOSF, we know that the Inner Circle has formed some type of alliance with Eris. In this quote, Azriel is trying to locate Eris’s whereabouts and if he’s alive but he can’t tell. His shadows are searching but they whisper to him that they can’t tell.
Cassian rolled his eyes. "I stopped spying because it bored me to death. I don't know how you put up with this all the time."
"It suits me." Azriel didn't halt his sharpening, though shadows gathered around his feet. (ACOSF, Chapter 68)
Spying and waiting for Eris to appear. Cassian is out of his mind due to Nesta being in the Blood Rite while Azriel sits in wait, sharpening Truth Teller, with his shadows present, waiting to alert any movement to him.
The shadows deepened around Azriel, his Siphons gleaming like cobalt fire. "You-we-trained them well, Cassian. Trust in that. It's all we can do." (ACOSF, Chapter 68)
The trio being involved in the Blood Rite is worrisome. Cassian is going out of his mind while Azriel attempts to calm him. Azriel, having not only experienced the Rite but knows how Illyrians are, causes his shadows to deepen.
MOR & CASSIAN
It was an effort not to stare at Azriel as he watched them head up the steep street, arm in arm bickering with every step. The shadows gathered around his shoulders, like they were indeed whispering to him, shielding him, perhaps. His broad chest expanded with a deep breath that sent them skittering, and then he set into an easy, graceful stroll after them. (ACOMAF, Chapter 29)
Feyre, the prophet herself, is the one to point out that seeing Azriel’s shadows gather around him as he watches Mor and Cassian is a sign of protection. This is her very first time experiencing Azriel display some form of longing and jealousy towards Cassian and Mor’s dynamic. His shadows seem as if they were whispering to him, to relax him. Honestly, his shadows here skitter due to unexpected air movement.
Now, please continue to tell me that when his shadows disappear, that it’s a bad thing. This quote right here literally proves otherwise. When the shadows disappear, he does not need them.
Skitter: to move lightly and quickly or hurriedly
Mor elbowed him in the ribs. Cassian nudged her right back as Azriel shook his head at both of them, shadows coiling around the tips of his wings. (ACOWAR, Chapter 16)
Slight jealousy about the dynamic between Mor and Cassian but not as much as the quote mentioned above. The Inner Circle is also discussing war against Hybern as well. Both instances bring out his shadows.
ELAIN
Azriel arrived first, no shadows to be seen, my sister a pale, golden mass in his arms. He, too, wore his Illyrian armor, Elain's golden-brown hair snagging in some of the black scales across his chest and shoulders.
He set her down gently on the foyer carpet, having carried her in through the front door.
Elain peered up at his patient, solemn face.
Azriel smiled faintly. "Would you like me to show you the garden?" (ACOWAR, Chapter 24)
By the time we get to this point within the series, we know that Azriel’s shadows are not always present. We see this here when he carries Elain down to the townhouse. This is not the first time Azriel has been in Elain’s presence. We know that they met at the Archeron estate back in ACOMAF (“the only two civilized ones here”) and we all know the ending to ACOMAF in Hybern.
With that being said, it is important to note that his shadows are nowhere to be seen when escorting Elain down to the townhouse. Just like he is when he is in the presence of Mor (and sometimes his family), he is comfortable enough to have no need for his shadows.
"I can help her," said Azriel, stepping to the table as Elain silently rose. No shadows at his ears, no darkness ringing his fingers as he extended a hand.
Nesta monitored him like a hawk, but kept silent as Elain took his hand, and out they went. (ACOWAR, Chapter 30)
Just like when he escorted Elain from the HoW to the townhouse, when he volunteers to escort Elain to the garden, there are no shadows. Again, he is at ease and is comfortable. I would also like to note that, not only does he volunteer to take Elain, but he’s also not hiding from the sunlight like I know some people like to think he does. Azriel craves sunlight, just as much as any person would, after being deprived from it for the first 11 years of his life.
Behind me, Mor took Nesta and Cassian by the hand, readying to winnow them to the camp, while shadows gathered around Azriel, Elain at his side, wide-eyed at the spymaster's display.
[...]
Rhys cleared his throat, and nodded to Mor. Then she was gone, Cassian and Nesta with her. Then Azriel, gently taking Elain's hand in his own, as if afraid his scars would hurt her. (ACOWAR, Chapter 50)
Without going too ‘pro Elriel’, I would like to take this opportunity to point out that Elain has never been afraid of Azriel and his shadows. She has looked at them with wonder and has never cringed from them. In this quote, Azriel is using his shadows to transport both him and Elain to Illyria.
Azriel stepped out of shadow. "What is that,'"he hissed.
My brows rose. 'You hear it?'
A shake of the head. "No- but the shadows, the wind... They recoil." (ACOWAR, Chapter 63)
As we know, Azriel’s shadows are different from winnowing. Azriel literally steps out of shadow when he uses them for transportation. We see that in this quote, along with the mention of the Cauldron and the noise it is making. The sound that the Cauldron gives off makes his shadows recoil.
Recoil: suddenly spring or flinch back in fear, horror, and disgust.
From shadows near the entrance to the tent, Azriel said, as if in answer to some unspoken debate, "I'm getting her back."
Nesta slid her gaze to the shadowsinger. Azriel's hazel eyes glowed golden in the shadows.
Nesta said, "Then you will die."
Azriel only repeated, rage glazing that stare, "I'm getting her back." (ACOWAR, Chapter 64)
Elain has been taken by the Cauldron to the Hybern camp. Azriel is surrounded by his shadows in anger. With the knowledge that he could potentially die, he does not hesitate to be the one to rescue Elain. By this point within the series, we know that when the shadows surround Azriel, he’s uncomfortable, brooding, angry, or all three.
Azriel silently faded into blackness- until he was my own shadow and nothing more. (ACOWAR, Chapter 65)
Feyre accompanies Azriel to Hybern’s camp to rescue Elain. With Feyre taking the form of Ianthe, Azriel uses his shadows to blend in with Feyre’s shadow as they enter- a form of stealth.
But through the laughter and singing and music, over the roar of the fire... Screaming.
A shadow gripped my shoulder, reminding me not to run.
Ianthe would not run- would not show alarm.
My mouth went dry as that scream sounded again.
I couldn't bear it- to let it go on, to see what was being done-
Azriel's shadow-hand grasped my own, tugging me closer. His rage rippled off his invisible form.
We made a lazy circuit of the revelry, other parts of it becoming clear. The screaming-
It was not Elain. (ACOWAR, Chapter 65)
While being Feyre’s “shadow” as she enters the camp as Ianthe, Azriel’s presence remains solid. When hearing a scream, Feyre can feel Azriel holding her back. In doing so, both of them have no idea whether or not it is Elain. We see Azriel’s fury at the thought of the screaming being Elain's when his shadow-covered hand grabs Feyre’s and she can literally feel his rage coming from him.
Azriel emerged from the deep shadows in the corner of the tent a heartbeat later. He jerked his chin toward the curtains in the back. I began intoning one of Ianthe's many prayers, a pretty speech I'd heard her say a thousand times at the Spring Court.
We rushed across the rugs, dodging tables and furniture. I chanted her prayers all the while.
Azriel slid back the curtain-
Elain was in her nightgown. Gagged, wrists wrapped in steel that glowed violet. Her eyes went wide as she say us- Azriel and me-
I shifted my face back into my own, raising a hand to my lips as Azriel knelt before her. I kept up my litany or praying, beseeching the Cauldron to make my womb fruitful, on and on-
Azriel gently removed the gag from her mouth. "Are you hurt?"
She shook her head, devouring the sight of him as if not quite believing it.
"You came for me." The shadowsinger only inclined his head. (ACOWAR, Chapter 65)
Elain’s rescue from the Hybern camp. Before this scene, it is noted that Jurian was aware of Azriel hiding in shadow. He emerges from the shadows in the tent to rescue Elain while Feyre continues the ruse of pretending to be Ianthe. I’m sorry, I couldn’t bring myself to cut half of this scene.
I saw the painting in my mind: a lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before Death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection... that knife. (ACOWAR, Chapter 69)
Before the battle of Hybern, Azriel gives Elain Truth-Teller, his prized dagger whom he has let no one in his entire life touch until Elain. From Feyre’s point of view, she pictures this scene in a poetic way- with Death itself standing before the Maiden, both who have formed a bond.
Side note: Throughout the ACOTAR series, it’s important to note that whenever Feyre thinks of a specific scene as a ‘painting’, it means that it’s pretty significant. All of her ‘paintings’ that she has pictured have been some type of foreshadowing or major event within the story.
"What now?" Elain mused, at last answering my question from a moment ago as her attention drifted to the windows facing the sunny street. That smile grew, bright enough that it lit up even Azriel's shadows across the room. "I would like to build a garden," she declared. "After all of this... I think the world needs more gardens." (ACOWAR, Chapter 80)
Another scene with Azriel’s shadows lightning when it comes to being in Elain’s presence. Everyone has just survived the war and is back in Velaris. For Elain, the one who took becoming Fae the hardest, smiled so bright that, not only did it brighten the entire room, but it brightened the shadows. Another sense of ease and comfort throughout Azriel and the entire IC.
The shadowsinger was clad in a black jacket and pants similar to Rhysand's- the fabric immaculately tailored and built to fit his wings. He still wore his Siphons atop either hand, and shadows trailed his footsteps, curling like swirled embers, but there was little sign of the warrior otherwise. Especially as he gently said to my sister, "Happy Solstice."
Elain turned from the snow falling in the darkness beyond and smiled slightly. "I've never participated in one of these." (ACOFAS, Chapter 19)
This is a good example that shows that yes, even in the presence of Elain, his shadows are sometimes still there. Azriel and Elain are not alone, they are in the presence of the entire Inner Circle. Azriel’s shadows are present for comfort, should he need it.
Azriel cleared his throat, and Cassian blinked. "What?"
"I said, are you two ready to head down to the river house?"
"Two?" He blinked through the cloud or arousal.
Azriel chuckled, shadows skittering. "Did you listen at all last night?"
"No."
"At least you're honest." Azriel smirked. "You and Nesta are wanted down there."
"Because of the shit with Elain?"
Azriel stilled. "What happened to Elain?"
Cassian waved a hand. "A fight with Nesta. Don't bring it up," he warned when Azriel's eyes darkened. Cassian blew out a breath, "I take that as a no regarding the meeting topic, then."
"It's about what I discovered. Rhys said he requires you both there."
"It's bad, then." Cassian surveyed the shadows gathered around Az. "You all right?"
His brother nodded. "Fine." But shadows still swarmed him.
Cassian knew it was a lie, but didn't push it. Az would speak when he was ready, and Cassian would have better success convincing a mountain to move than getting Az to open. (ACOSF, Chapter 19)
I put this quote in the Elain category because it obviously has to do with Elain. Two things need to be said about this quote.
1. Once again, his shadows skitter due to unexpected air movement. When Azriel laughs, his shadows skitter. They literally move away from him. Remember that.
Skitter: to move lightly and quickly or hurriedly
2. Azriel is at the HoW to inform Cassian and Nesta that they’re needed at the Riverside estate. He is taken off guard when he learns there was a fight between Nesta and Elain. Cassian makes note of the shadows that are building up and swarming Azriel. He even questions if he’s okay because he notices the change. Azriel was fuming at the thought of Elain being hurt and/or upset. Cassian even knows it’s a lie when Azriel tells him he’s fine.
“Look who decided to grow claws after all,” she crooned. “Maybe you’ll become interesting at last, Elain.”
Nesta saw the blow land, like a physical impact, in Elain’s face, her posture. No one spoke, though shadows gathered in the corners of the room, like snakes preparing to strike. (ACOSF, Chapter 21)
Listen, this is the same energy as the time when Cassian was briefly telling Azriel about the fight Nesta and Elain previously had. Quick recap: Azriel got pissed at the thought of Elain being hurt by Nesta. Shadows gathered around him because of how pissed he was. The end. Again, same energy.
Azriel is in the room when this scene is taking place. Nesta doesn’t want Elain being involved when it comes to tracking the Dread Trove’s. Elain fights back because she wants to help. Nesta decides to be a bitch about it. Everyone in the room can see how Nesta’s words affected Elain. Azriel, witnessing this all take place, is pissed yet again. Hence how his shadows are getting prepared to strike at Nesta, Elain’s own sister. This same exact phrase was used about Azriel himself being done with Nesta. Please, refrain from saying that the shadows hate Elain. If they hated her, they would literally just say “you’re on your own with this.” Miss me with that b.s.
NESTA
Azriel said coolly, "I don't need to resort to threats." The shadows coiled around him, snakes ready to strike. (ACOSF, Chapter 8)
Nesta is in a bad mood. Azriel is in a bad mood. Nesta threatens and challenges Azriel. Azriel’s shadows react to his mood, ready to protect him from a threat. Case closed.
Azriel turned to them fully this time, eyes narrowed. Like those shadows had whispered something to him. (ACOSF, Chapter 44)
Cassian is telling Nesta, Emerie, and Gwyn about his time with the Valkyries. The rebirth of the Valkyries is a pretty big fucking deal and since Azriel was not with Cassian during his time spent with the Valkyries during the first war, he does not know much about them. As Azriel is training the other priestesses, Cassian is telling his story. Before this quote, it is stated that Azriel is monitoring every word and gesture that Cassian is making. Azriel’s shadows seem to whisper to him to listen because it’s a big deal.
Azriel lingered near the door, quiet enough that when Feyre and Mor began talking about some of her painting, Nesta went over to him.
"Why don't you sit?" She leaned against the doorway beside the shadowsinger.
"My shadows don't like the flames so much." A pretty lie. She'd seen Azriel before the fire plenty. But she looked at who sat close to it and knew the answer.
"Why did you come if it torments you so much?"
"Because Rhys wants me here. It'd hurt him if I didn't come."
"Well, I think holidays are stupid."
"I don't."
She arched a brow. He explained, "They pull people together. And bring them joy. They are a time to pause and reflect and gather, and those are never bad things." Shadows darkened his eyes, full of enough pain that she couldn't stop herself from touching his shoulder. Letting him see that she understood why he stood in the doorway, why he wouldn't go near the fire.
His secret to tell, never hers.
Azriel's face remained neutral. (ACOSF, Chapter 58)
In this scene, Azriel uses his shadows as an excuse as to why he is standing away from the fire, lingering in the doorway. Nesta can see through his lie and learns the real reason why he cannot be near the fire. *cough* Elain *cough*
Queue Sarah Janet Maas: “Nesta learns some of Az’s secrets.”
Azriel blushed and stepped back, shadows swirling. (ACOSF, Chapter 58)
When Azriel gives Nesta her gift at Solstice, she jumps up and hugs him, surprising everyone. Due to slight embarrassment, his shadows are around him, just in case he feels the need to shield himself from the embarrassment.
Cassian lingered at the doorway as Nesta murmured to Gwyn, "You've got this." Azriel came up beside him, silent as the shadows that wreathed his wings. (ACOSF, Chapter 60)
Both Cassian and Azriel are watching the trio do more Valkyrie training. Azriel’s shadows continue to surround him. Enough said.
Az's shadows danced around him. "Since there's no chance in hell any of you will finish the course, we didn't bother to get a prize." (ACOSF, Chapter 60)
Azriel is talking to all of the priestesses, along with Nesta and Emerie, about their upcoming obstacle course. Cassian and Azriel are having fun with this because they don’t see any of them accomplishing the course.
Note: This quote seems to be a hot topic when it comes to Azriel and his shadows. The word danced is just used as an analogy for movement, a word that SJM uses often. If you’re interested, check out my small post here for examples.
AZRIEL & THE SHADOWS
Azriel's dark breeze was different from Rhys's. Colder. Sharper. It cut through the world like a blade, spearing us toward that army camp. (ACOWAR, Chapter 64)
Feyre here is explaining the difference between Rhys’s shadows and Azriel’s. Basically implying that while Rhys may have shadows sometimes, especially with winnowing, Azriel’s are different.
Cassian soared over the House of Wind to find Azriel there, hovering in place, a heavy pack in his hand. Whether that had been from a separate warning from Rhys, or Az's own shadows whispering, he didn't know. (ACOSF, Chapter 47)
Again, another example of how Azriel’s shadows basically hear everything, report back to him, and Azriel can do what needs to be done.
Even Azriel's own shadows kept tucked behind his wings. Koschei laughed, and Azriel stiffened. Like his shadows had murmured a warning. (ACOSF, Chapter 71)
Meeting Koschei, Azriel’s shadows seem to be just as terrified of him as Azriel does. Koschei speaks on the wind, Azirel’s shadows speak on the wind as well. Koschei said something to his shadows through the wind, causing them to warn Azriel who, in turn, then had “pure terror” on his face. He then grabs Eris and flees.
AZRIEL POV
Az snickered to himself, to the listening shadows around him.
Sleep, they seemed to whisper in his ear. Sleep.
I wish I could, he answered silently. But sleep so rarely found him these days.
Coming from Azriel himself, he speaks and listens to his shadows in their own language. They seem to want what’s best from him and his health, as they’re telling him to get some sleep because he gets so little.
But even the silence weighed too heavily, and though the shadows kept him company, as they always had, as they always would, he found himself leaving the room. Entering the foyer.
Confirmed. Whenever the shadows are around, they keep him company. Now please, tell me more about how his shadows disappearing is a bad thing. Next.
Lie. Well, the second part was a lie. He didn't need his shadows to read her tone, the slight tightening of her face.
“He didn’t need his shadows”. This is literally telling us that he uses his shadows to get a feel for what a person might be thinking. The fact that Azriel doesn’t need to depend on his shadows to read Elain should tell everyone just how close their dynamic with each other is.
Elain sucked in a soft breath that whispered over his skin. His shadows skittered back at the sound. They'd always been prone to vanish when she was around.
Again with the word ‘skitter’. This time, his shadows skitter due to the sound Elain makes. This is not a bad thing. Azriel’s shadows skittered back when Azriel himself laughed. C’mon now. Please see the definition for skitter below. Azriel also recognizes that his shadows vanish in Elain’s presence. This is basically implying that it’s not a bad thing. Like I said before, if Azriel isn’t concerned, why are you?
Skitter: to move lightly and quickly or hurriedly
[...] Azriel let his shadows whisk away the box as she said softly, "Put it on me?"
Here we have his shadows essentially working for him. Not much else to it.
Azriel winnowed into shadows before she could say anything, appearing at the doors to Rhys's study a heartbeat later. His shadows whispered in his ear that Elain had gone upstairs.
Here Azriel uses his shadows to transport himself to Rhys’s study. They also seem to be keeping watch over Elain, as they report to him that she had gone upstairs when he left.
(1) He found it already occupied. His shadows had not warned him.
(2) “It's fine. I came to retrieve something I forgot." The lie was smooth and cool, as he knew his face was. His shadows peered over his wings at her.
(3) The young priestess smiled--and Azriel thought it might have been directed at his curious shadows.
(4) “How was the party?" Her breath curled in front of her mouth, and one of his shadows darted out to dance with it before twirling back to him. Like it heard some silent music.
(5) Azriel dipped his head in a sketch of a bow, something restless settling in him. Even his shadows had calmed. As if content to lounge on his shoulders and watch.
(6) Azriel entered the warmth of the stairwell, and as he descended, he could have sworn a faint, beautiful singing followed him. Could have sworn his shadows sang in answer.
Okay, here’s the deal. I’m combining all of the quotes about Gwyn because it’s easier to explain all at once. So, first things first, his shadows did not warn him when he was flying to the training ring (1). Very strange, based on the fact that his shadows tell him literally everything else. His shadows not warning him should not be taken as a good thing, let’s be real. We also have his shadows sitting on his shoulders and peering over his wings (2, 5). As seen in the quote above, Azriel knows and is aware that his shadows are there to also provide him comfort. This is coming from Azriel himself. Once again, Azriel’s shadows being present is a sign of comfort, protection, and/or work.
Gwyn also seems to be more interested in the shadows rather than Azriel himself (3). This correlates to how his shadows react to Gwyns breath and singing (4, 6). AGAIN, his shadows are the one’s reacting to Gwyn, not Azriel. I, personally, find it a little odd that the shadows react to Gwyn’s breath/singing the way they do. Very similar to how Nesta’s power within her reacted to Gwyn’s singing as well.
Yes, I’m going to be that person and say that all of these interactions with Gwyn pretty much confirm her being a Lightsinger. I am not saying that Gwyn will be evil (my god, I can’t believe I have to even say that about every Gwyn post), all I’m saying is that there's a pretty good chance that she is. Whether she’s being manipulated or she has no clue, who knows. Long story short, Azriel’s shadows are basically trying to figure out Gwyn’s “secret” (see ACOSF, Chapter 9 for more details).
BONUS
Elain stepped out of a shadow behind him, and rammed Truth-Teller to the hilt through the back of the king's neck as she snarled in his ear, "Don't you touch my sister." (ACOWAR, Chapter 74)
I debated whether or not to add this but why not. Elain was using Truth-Teller, Azriel’s dagger. Were these Azriel’s shadows? Elain’s shadows? Does using Truth-Teller give a connection to Azriel and his shadows? Who knows.
#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#feyre archeron#rhysand#cassian#morrigan#amren#inner circle#elain archeron#nesta archeron#acotar#acomaf#acowar#acofas#acosf#i'm sick of these shadow arguments#move on please#mine
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ThunderCats - “Berbils”
Written By: Leonard Starr
The ThunderCats meet some weird friends.
(I would, and should, have completed this during the weekend, but ThunderCats reviews were one of the last things on my mind the last few days. Of course, with all this extra time I have now, I had no excuse to not complete it yesterday. If this ends up published unfinished, which it is if this text is still here, please be patient.)
The episode begins with Mumm-Ra the Ever Living proving his tagline, by emerging from his tomb. Sure, he's not the muscular blue guy that Skeletor could look up to anymore, but he's still willing. He talks to himself, and the audience, about how he's going to make sure that Eye of Thundara is "accidentally destroyed." That will be a thing he's doing throughout the episode, as the Mutants of Plun-Darr don't even make an appearance here.
As Mumm-Ra looks on with his magical pool, we see that Panthro has made a Thunder Tank out of the scraps of the ship. Last week's Cool Toy was the Claw Shield, and this week's new Cool Toy is the Thunder Tank, something he had been teasing since the last episode. While Panthro is gloating about how he's the champion scrounger of the universe, the sky turns dark and stones start falling.
WilyKat: Stones, my whiskers! These are boulders!
They don't even have whiskers. At least, not drawn ones.
In the end, this just turns into an advertisement for the Thunder Tank, complete with some rock music for the rock digging. It can protect Panthro from the rock storm! It can dig through rocks! It can dig out scrapped spaceships! It's only $99.99 at Kay Bee Toys!
After the ThunderCats are saved by the Cool Toy of the Week, which only makes a small appearance at the end of the episode, Tygra theorizes this storm could not be natural. They don't seem to investigate who or what caused it, and it never comes up again. It's actually not that clear if it was Mumm-Ra caused it, with only a very slight implication in the intro, though it would be a good guess. I'd imagine being able to summon ston, er boulder storms at will would be a good ability to use constantly.
Meanwhile, Lion-O and Snarf are doing another look in the nearby forest, though Snarf is only following Lion-O and warning him that he's straying too far from the camp. Lion-O shrugs him off, telling him to stay back if he's scared. Not even 5 seconds from his appearance in this episode, Snarf is already being told to stay back. Lion-O tells him he'd jump at his own shadow, and Snarf then proves it by doing just that, proving that he probably should stay back. Ah, the comic relief.
The next scene will try to add a little more to Snarf's character besides, "Snarf Snarf you shouldn't be doing this", and "Snarf Snarf I'm hungry": he can run around beasts that looked like they were just standing there and can cut vines with his teeth. The latter comes in handy when Lion-O falls into a hole. A very, very slippery hole, he says, giving us a hint that this is more than just something caused by a natural or Mumm-Ra-caused disaster.
Snarf tries his best to get him out of the hole, but Lion-O simply can't do it. Emphasis on "try", though not because of him. The hole is also really slippery, and Lion-O can't figure out why he can't. Both Snarf and Lion-O get lassoed multiple times by some mysterious strangers made partially of metal.
In the same year the cartoons based on the Droids and Ewoks from Star Wars came out, ThunderCats came up with a combination of the two. While they can seemingly speak English, they speak in the same manner as the computer from WarGames. Unfortunately, as he's lassoed up, he can't summon the ThunderCats because he can't grasp his sword. The episode even cuts to the other ThunderCats talking about how Lion-O must be okay because he didn't do that. Panthro justifies their lack of caring because...
Panthro: No sense worrying, he's a man now.
Did you forget what Tygra said in the last episode? Well, he did manage to defeat that Mumm-Ra guy once, so he must be okay. Of course, he isn't, as he ends up getting tied to a stake. Lion-O tries to communicate with them by calling them "whatever they are", and they say "Berbil." Berbil? They look more like bears to me. Cute little Care Bears...
...no, wait, sorry! Put that knife away! I'm also sorry I accidentally called you Bergins before I edited that post! I don't know why I did, I really didn't like Trolls! Honest!
No, just kidding, Ro-Bear-Bill, as he eventually names himself, uses that knife to cut the rope. Apparently, trapping people and tying them to stakes is their way of saying "hi". They really just went from "one step away from roasting him over an open fire" to "future friend" in just one minute. Then again, I can imagine Third Earth can do that to people, with those rock storms and all.
We get a brief glimpse of their home village, which look surprisingly similar to another 80's cartoon's village. For a desolate planet, these guys seem to be living okay. There's just one problem.
We eventually had to get some evil dog-men in this series about Thunderous Felines, but they're not going to fight the ThunderCats. Instead, they're going after the Ro-Bear's supply of food. The Ro-Bears do have a line of defense: stun bullets fired via little tubes, as if they’re pelting them with spitballs. They’re just as effective as that analogy sounds, as even they admit that it does nothing. Lion-O is not impressed by this.
Lion-O, in an attempt to finally do something about this constant struggle. They just run away after this. That was a really short battle, but Ro-Bear Bill seems to have an opinion that may not be mine.
Ro-Bear-Bill: My my! That certainly was exciting, Lion-O!
Whatever you say, Ro-Bear-Bill.
Ro-Bear Bill decides to tell Lion-O that they know why they have to steal the Berbil berries: because they have to give them to the Giantors, who will give them their food in exchange for the berries. Now, the Giantors will be angry! This is partially why I hate these kinds of lateral thinking puzzles, they suddenly bring in details they never talk about.
Also, are these guys 100% human? Sure, they're bigger and are probably more Homo Erectus than Sapien. I guess if there's mutant monkeys, as proven by Monkian, mutant humans shouldn't be too far off.
Lion-O uses the Sword of Omen's Sight Beyond Sight, and, sure enough, he sees that those Giantors are angry. They want those berries, dammit!
Lion-O: I can probably handle them myself!
Snarf: Snarf, snarf! No, please, call the other ThunderCats! (clasping his hands, praying he won't try to take on a bunch of giants by himself)
Lion-O: Well, okay, just to please you.
Even when Snarf has a decent idea, he has to be told off. He decides not to try to do it himself this time. I would like to think that even if Lion-O took care of the bad guys last time, he realized he really lucked out with a villain that hates reflections.
So the ThunderCats fight the Giantors, and it's better than the last episode's fight scenes. One of the moves involves Panthero looking like he's going to kick one of the Giantors right in the face, but he stops about an inch away. One more inch, and we'd have to invent FV long before the TV rating system even existed!
It eventually ends when Lion-O does that Sword of Omens barrier thing again, and the Giantors don't even try to see if their giant clubs can go through it. Ro-Bear Bill decides not to give a review of the fight he just saw, but does congratulate the ThunderCats for saving their village.
While it seems that the conflict of the episode is over, Mumm-Ra has to do something in this episode after doing that big speech in the beginning. Realizing the Berbils will give the ThunderCats food supply, he decides to attack the Berbils by transforming again. This time, he shows off that he can transform into a swarm of bugs that can also merge into a giant bug, a pretty creative idea. Lion-O fights this bug by riding it like it was one of those mechanical bulls. Either he actually said "yee-haw", or I just imagined it.
Definitely not worthy of a "yee-haw", at least from Lion-O's point of view: the bug then flies off and dissipates back into the swarm, dropping Lion-O into a volcano. Worst of all, the Sword of Omens, which definitely must have something that can help him out here, is just ever so slightly out of his reach. If only Tutorial Jaga was here!
Thankfully, Tutorial Jaga shows up again, this time in the familiar blue aura he usually has, to tell him yet another feature of the sword: it can be commanded to go right to Lion-O. This also allows it to fly, leading to a scene where Lion-O is flying out of a volcano, looking like he's being dragged out of there.
But what about Mumm-Ra? Sure, he could just go back and cause some more trouble, but he decided to give up here for some reason. He knows he failed, but he does tell himself, and the audience, that he should do better next time, and time is nothing to him.
In the end, Mumm-Ra just gives up, the ThunderCats are victorious, and the Ro-Bear Berbils give them a banquet to celebrate their saving of the town. They even offer to build the ThunderCats' real estate, which they find the blueprints of. The ThunderCats initially initially refuse, but they insist on building it. After all, friends help friends right after catching them in traps and tying them to a stake.
How does it stack up?
There is a little more world-building here that doesn't entirely revolve around exposition this time. I think I'll give this one a higher rating than the last, even if this does give it the same rating as the first episode. I mean, this is the one with the robotic Care Bear...
Ah! Fine, I'll give it four cats, put the knife away!
Next, those Mutants come back.
← The Unholy Alliance 🐯 The Slaves of Castle Plun-Darr →
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I trained myself to become a person who writes the whole fic before posting by doing the following.
I supplemented the need for instant-validation/posting by posting updates with excerpts from the draft.
Also talking about your fic with a friend can help quell the posting urge.
I intentionally write in ways that make me think of the fic as a draft that needs to be edited later. If the work needs several arounds of polishing before it is postable, I am less likely to go well I just need to proofread and then post. So stuff like:
The bracket writing method where when you get stuck you write brackets with what you need a word, food porn scene, character name, I don't know but I need a placeholder until I know, etc. and then continue writing instead of looking the detail up or forcing yourself to write something that isn't working for you.
I'll abbreviate names in fandoms where the names or titles are hard to remember or follow because there are so many people.
I'll write more exposition than I would prefer. Although, that is more due to what I needed to write get my brain warmed up to write what I needed for the scene I don't delete any of it. I tell myself I'll edit it shorter later.
I used to have in big text "Don't you dare post to this". I don't have that anymore but the reminder did help.
I avoid editing as I write. There's a few reasons for this. One it slows writing my draft down. Two if a section feels polished I am more likely to want to just post it. Three if I know there's a ton of edits I would need to make a post I feel like waiting and doing them at once is a better choice.
I also to stop myself from re-reading my fic because it would make me want to editi. I have as a heading a variant of "Save Point just fucking writing". Every time I open my document, I automatically use the outline feature to jump to that heading. I can't edit if I can't see what I wrote before.
I do think having an outline makes the whole process of writing an entire work out and editing later a bit less daunting but it isn't necessary.
I remind myself that a lot of my favorite lines, ideas, details, etc in my writing appeared after I edited the fic and not even during my first or second edit.
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A comment on having the patience to write a whole work before posting. I am very impatient and every time I am writing I stare at the fic, urging it to already be finished.
I do a lot of silly things to finish the fic first. I pretend it's a challenge, I act as if the idea is haunting me (it does sometimes but I bemoan it as if the fic is bothering me), I try to rile myself up because spite makes writing more easy. You do not know how many times I've opened a wip saying, "I am fucking finishing you" only to add about 1-3k and find that oh no this fic is going to be longer than I realized.
How can I be more patient about writing? Whenever I finish a chapter and have edited it for typos, I want to post IMMEDIATELY, but I'd love to be one of those people who writes the whole story and takes time to edit the whole thing, once I know where it's going. Instead I post as I write, on an irregular schedule, and I have no idea where my fics are going besides the loose end-goal. Advice? Thanks!
I also write and post immediately with perhaps a pause to reread and see if there are any typos or anything missing, so I’m afraid I can’t really help you, anon. I’d also love to be a person who can plan ahead and write a full fic before posting but that’s just not how I work.
Can anyone else help me and anon out? Please? 😆
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