#can't wait for people's reactions to tomorrow's posts

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Five Fics Friday: September 20/24

Happy Friday everyone!! It's a super special one today, as it marks the END OF YEAR FIVE OF WEEKLY FIVE FICS FRIDAY POSTS!!!

That's TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY LISTS FOR BOOSTED FICS!!!

I can't believe I've done this for five years weekly, and I hope you've enjoyed them all that time! I'll post up the masterlist tomorrow for Year Five, so in the interim, make sure to give this week's fics some love! Enjoy!

SIGNAL BOOSTING

Debris by Monkeysock (M, 15,094 w., 14 Ch. || First Person POV Alternating, Case Fic, Sherlock Whump, Flashbacks, Guilt, Waiting, Hospital, Angst) –Sherlock becomes trapped under a load of debris when a building collapses on top of him. He waits for rescue. Everyone is different, they only know what they know. In the aftermath, everybody has a story to tell.

RECENT MFLs

Little Slices of Death by Enterthetadpole (E, 994 w., 1 Ch. || Friends To Lovers, Horror, Humour, Happy Ending, Case Fic, Romance) – Sherlock Holmes gets involved in a case where the victims and crimes that are eerily similar to the works of a certain horror author stories. Will he solve the case before the people around him die around him?

I Meet You There, and We Go by irisbleufic (E, 6,370 w., 4 Ch. || Alternate Universe || Aftermath of TGG Pool Scene, Grief/Mourning, Supernatural Elements, Established Relationship, PTSD, Neurodiversity, Disability, Character Death) – "I dream of what it's like," [Sherlock] says with difficulty, and the words taste right in spite of the fact that everything else tastes wrong, "when we leave this place." John is quiet for an unbearably long while (too quiet: no humming, no breath) before he lets his forehead drop to rest against Sherlock's, smudge of ash and grit and sweat mixed with something far too heavy to be tears. He presses one hand over Sherlock's heart, and there's warmth again. The promise dazzles him. It stings. "What's it like?" asks John, finally, his voice thick with the promise of rest.

The Scientific Method by NovaWasTaken1 (T, 11,883 w., 1 Ch. || THoB Divergence, Doctor John, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Headaches / Migraines, Sick Sherlock) – Dosing former drug addict Sherlock Holmes turns out to be just a little more complicated than an aerosol spray. An AU of Hounds of the Baskervilles, in which Sherlock's reaction to being drugged winds up being a little more than an anxiety attack.

Secondary Exposure by thesardine (T, 18,841 w., 7 Ch. || Whump, Tags to Be Added) – After twenty years, the killer who abducted John as a child has resurfaced. Now John and Sherlock must track him down before he claims another victim, and at the same time navigate the shifting nature of their relationship.

[3-heartstyle]

Corabat himself!

Full body design of the suit. Referencing the Arkham games. (Gotta tag @corafest since it's still a prompt for the event)

But don't worry everyone! He's still the same silly guy we love :D

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

02/14/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; Cast & Crew Sightings; Samba Schutte Cameo; Taika & Rita; Rhys Darby; Dominic Burgess; Lindsey Cantrell; Con O Neill Love Project; Lovely Letters; Moonglow Manifesting; Lube As A Crew; Watch Party Reminders; Uncle; People of Earth; Articles; Petition Thread; Love Notes; Gay men kissing;

= Cast & Crew Sightings =

= Samba Schutte =

Samba Schutte recorded a beautiful Cameo for all of us. Thank you @saveofmdcrewmates for sharing this lovely gift with us! Src: Tumblr Today is about sharing love -- with friends, family, and crew, so we want to share this with you! 💕 https://www.cameo.com/recipient/65c16e19f7ff859ddd914500

= Taika Waititi =

Rita Ora and Taika Waititi were out here being adorable with each other on Instagram today. I realise it's not OFMD related, but Taika needs love and support and that's what we're doing tonight.

= Rhys Darby =

Rhys Darby is back with this adorable grey kitten that everyone is jealous of.

Photo Srcs: ofmd-ann , Rhys' Tiktok , Tumblr - ty @kiwistede

= Dominic Burgess =

Our hilarious friend Dominic Burgess is just out here at it again being supportive AF during our events. I love this man.

= Lindsey Cantrell =

Just some love from Lindsey Cantrell on her IG Stories

== Con O Neil Love Project on IG =

Somehow I missed these! Very sweet video project for Con O'Neill happening on IG, thank you @ringasunn for posting these!

There are three videos up so far, but sounds like a 4th is on the way and Con is feeling the love you all! Such an amazing Job!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

== Lovely Letters ==

The Kudoboard for Valentine's day was sent out this morning on various platforms. Please feel free to check out some of the Lovely Letters the crew wrote to our dear Cast & Crew family.

== Moonglow Manifesting ==

Several of our crew have been manifesting moonglow and setting up spaces in their homes for that manifesting! Please check out some of the gorgeous and creative setups our crew have put together! In order of appearance: @_irene_adler, @tayleafz, @snailforkery

== Lube As A Crew ==

So @Astroglide had decided to do another Watch Party after the #ReviewAsACrew theme that was going on. @yronnia was kind enough to notify me of this fantastic review that came up before the party.

So as usual, so many memes (may of the valentine's cards are from @astroglideofficial) and responses came with the latest @Astroglide watch of the episodes 8, 9 , 10 of S1.

And @astroglideofficial's reactions were glorious as expected (reach from bottom up for chronological reactions)

However, as you can imagine, finishing at episode 10 left them where the rest of us were.

Can't wait for them to see Season 2! Hopefully they'll get some of their hope back!

== Watch Party Reminders! ==

= Feb 15/16: Uncle Season 1 =

Next 3 episodes of Uncle tomorrow! This is mainly for UK folks but non-uk folks are welcome to vpn in as well! Here's an article on how to join via vpn!

16 Feb, GMT - 8 PM, ET - 3 PM, PST - 12pm (episodes 4-6)

WatchParty Hashtags:

#ForTheNewUncle

#SaveOFMD

#AdoptOurCrew

= People Of Earth S1 Ep 7, 8 =

#PiratesOfEarth has been going great these last couple days! Thank you again to @iamadequate1 for organising it! Next episodes: 7 and 8 tomorrow the 15th! at 10PM GMT / 5PM EST / 4PM CST / 2 PM PST

== Articles ==

Our Flag Means Death - Streaming services are continuing to sink ships - ty @manthastar

10 Media Award-Nominated Series That Will Steal Your Heart This Valentine's Day!

== Petition Thread ==

Our friend @sonnetforbonnet was kind enough to get a twitter thread going for all the petitions for cancelled shows. For those of you without Twitter here are the Petition links.

Our Flag Means Death

Shadow & Bone / Six Of Crows

A League Of Their Own

Gentleman Jack

Station 19

Hotel Mondial

Julia

Lockwood & Co

Infinity Train

People Of Earth

Rap Sh!t

Schmigadoon!

First Kill

Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies

1899

Coyote Vs. Acme

== Love Notes ==

Hey Lovelies <3 I hope that however you celebrated today, (Valentine's Day, Captain Cook's Murder Day, Your Birthday, whatever it happened to be) that you got something positive and fun out of it. I know this day is a mixed bag for a lot of folks, so any way you are able to get something good out of it, I'm excited for. A little gentle reminder, something that took me a lot of years to realise -- you are enough, with or without a partner, I hope you know that. Your partner or lack of one doesn't define you. You are you and you are wonderful and you are enchanting. You could be in the perfect relationship and that other person(s) could bring out the best in you, and yet, the best in you is still you. You shine because you are a beautiful, unique little radiant ball of starstuff, and don't you ever forget it. You deserve just as much love as you give to others, no matter what anyone says, and you deserve to be happy and to be you, just the way you are. Now matter how you feel on any given day, no matter how much energy, or spoons, or love you have for yourself, you are doing enough, and you deserve all the wonderful things this world has to offer. I know I speak for all of us on this safespaceship crew, when I say I hope tomorrow brings you joy, and love, and unhinged laughter. Get some rest babes, love you <3

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Yeah so, since Rhys and Taika already had new footage earlier in the recap tonight. I'm gonna be a sappy little bitch and just show you the same old footage of two gay men kissing because it brings life.

[jolynesmom]

I hate to share this but I don't have anyone to talk. It's been so long I've discovered about void and since then I've always wanted to manifest "family Change " in the void cause my mother. I don't want to make her the villian in my life but I can't help she literally abuse me everytime and says the filthiest, dirtiest things which I swear no parents says to their children and even my dad doesn't stop her . Everyday I having a mental breakdown and I go to bed with the hope that I will enter the void and I don't have to face the same day tomorrow again. To be honest I don't know how can I enter void at this low . I've been literally loosing hope. I feel like the void actually a void which will never come to me

hey I’m so sorry to hear that :(( my heart breaks every time someone comes to me saying they’re abused by their family. it’s such a disgusting thing and I’ll never wrap my head around on how someone can do this to their child

I really wish I could do something for your situation, but all I can do is give you a few words of advice

before anything I want to let you know that you shouldn’t feel guilty for villainizing your parents. such things are not normal and should not be excused. your parents should be thankful that the only thing you want from them is a healthy relationship after what they’ve put you through

let’s address the first issue. you’re not motivated to enter the void because you’re brought down by your circumstances. a lot of you seem to forget that the law of assumption exists and you can use it to successfully change your circumstances instantly without entering the void state. hell, you can use law of assumption to enter the void!! use the law of assumption to make your parents leave you alone or to even do a 180° in their behavior

I was actually in a similar position before entering the void where I was demotivated to even try because of my dad’s behavior towards me, so I used the law of assumption to make his stop being so harsh towards me. not only did he start to be nicer to me, but he even moved back to our home country due to some circumstances while I stayed in the uk, since then I’ve only known peace

if you don’t want to use loa to change your circumstances (which you should) then use the negativity in your life to fuel your motivation to enter the void. like ‘everyone treats me so bad, let’s see their reaction after I fulfill my desires and they’ll remain miserable here’

I feel like a broken record because I’ve said it so many times, but entering the void is embarrassingly easy. like I mean it, it’s so easy once I almost tapped into it while I laid down for 3 minutes waiting for my food to heat in the oven. and the great part about the void is that you don’t need a great mindset or to be overly motivated to try a complex method that will take you 3 hours to finish, you can just say ‘I want to enter the void’, fall asleep and wake up there

this is why I don’t like those challenges people do to change their mindset, affirm 100k times per day, listen to subs 25/8, do complicated meditations, vaunt or whatever. if you want to do them and feel like they’ll take you closer to the void, by all means go off, but you absolutely do not need them lol

when I entered the void for the first time I didn’t do anything special, I actually didn’t even think it’s possible to do it without yoga nidra then I tapped into it instantly when I was in a state between asleep and awake and said to myself that I want to enter the void asap

so yeah, use loa, treat everything with indifference and persist even if your circumstances are unfavorable

I’ll link some posts below that will hopefully give you some direction and motivation to persist

sending you lots of love and positive energy 🤍

🫐jani’s law of assumption guide

🍓 manifestation/loa is your bff

🥝psa: you can manifest anything

🍊 manifestation in 3 steps

🍑 doubting the void?

🍒 lullaby method to enter the void (personal favorite)

🥥distraction method to enter the void state

🍇 arlinski void state method

I also suggest you to check out @/tia-222 on tumblr because they have amazing posts which helped me master the void state in less than 3 weeks

[esre13]

Hello, I saw your post and wanted to leave my request here .

I would like both, Aventurine and Sunday (if you want one, do as you wish) with a reader as challenging and controlling as them, always a few steps ahead and having them in the palm of his hand

Sorry for bad English <3

ofc hehehhehe this might be goooood

You were always known for your trustworthiness and how thoughtful you could be. Showing people with affection, being kind, or small little favors you did them. But sometimes, people can realize the true challenge you had inside of your soul. Your actions on helping people showed that deep down, you wanted to be the only person they could count on. And if anyone gives in to your fake kindness, you know they will never want to part from it. Aventurine knows this by heart. Just for one day of being your co-worker, he helplessly falls for your heartwarming smile and your random deeds you did for him throughout the day.. Oh but once your true colors shown..

He couldn't help but want you all to himself.

A puppet if he could, but he knows he can never reach you. Someone as close to how he acts, he can never have full grasp on you. You were immune to his clutches, his will, his love. Oh how he wanted to keep you, but you always provoked him with flirting with other men or women on the IPC whenever you wanted. All you wanted to do was see a reaction from him! Nothing so wrong, was it?

Of course, with the IPC and all having the gest regards from your co-workers wanted to send you to Penacony to speak to the Family about a debt they had been supposed to pay. Aventurine tried and tried to get you off of this case but a las, you came to Penacony, got yourself a hotel room and waited to be entered into the Golden Hour. You wake up startled, soaring through the sky as you land right near a huge statue of a sentient clock character.

You can't help but stare at the tall white-clothed man standing before you, his wings fluttering a bit as his eyes bear into yours. He seemed familiar.. He grabs your wrist and pulls you up to your feet. "Welcome to Penacony's Golden Hour. Nice to meet you, my friend." He grinned, his eyes bore into yours as his handshake was firm and strong. You give him a firm handshake back, then you pulled out a sheet that shows the Family's debts. "Mr. Sunday, I pressume?" You scoffed, "You have many debts that you have to pay, courtesy of the IPC?" His smile faded as a big frown plastered his face. "Oh dear, that's tomorrows problem, aren't you excited to be in the Golden Hour?" He shrugged it off, he can't have any problems happening before the festival, even for a disrespectful yet pretty person you were.

You grip his hand harder as your voice becomes more harsh. "Mr. Sunday, if you don't pay up soon, we might take our needs to our own hands. Say take someone dear to you, Ms. Robin maybe?" His face dropped cold and his eyes stood blankly. He seemed, scared? Worried that someone else could have as much power as he can but.. why Robin? You couldn't harm her, could you. "What business are you talking now, friend? Let's talk in a better area.." He pushed you closer to him as you both walk to a secluded place, away from all those prying eyes.

[cult-of-the-eye]

Mag 81 A Guest for Mr Spider

FUCK FORMER HEAD ARCHIVIST

Wait I need to check the timelines - this was 2 days after leitner's death

New spooky music???

My man is so fucking dramatic I love him so much "grand of sand behind my eye" love the way he speaks

Yeah FUCK JURGEN LEITNER

Omg the greying hair is canon??

Child in the 90s makes him at most 27 GOD DAMN. I was imagining like mid 30s...can you imagine a fucking 27 yr old using words like "ilk" when talking to you

Oh shit he's an orphan poor guy

Yeah ok a lot of his personality seems to make sense if you realise he was raised by his grandma

You know those memes that are like people raised by their grandparents are exceptionally polite but in a brisk way, talk fancy and are super posh? Yeah that's him.

Getting such neurodivergent vibes

Yeah he sounds like a main character from the start Jesus Christ he's such a kid who got traumatised and then grows up to be a horror protagonist vibes

My First Leitner lol like kids had to be introduced to them at a young age like those my first toys

He's so funny I can just imagine him as an 8 yr old getting super like affronted at this like how dare my grandma think I am of subpar intelligence he's such a little bitch from the start

"The eponymous Mr spider" even talking about his childhood trauma he's busting out the vocabulary

Fuck that story actually kinda rattled me I had my hand over my mouth in shock for most of it

I think it was the bit where the horsefly brought his son and they were both crying that got me, I could definitely imagine it scaring an 8 yr old

The way it drags out as well, with the pages of the same scene it really heightens the suspense

Is his childhood bully someone we should keep track of?? Love how he says Michael probably cause he sees him as a bully lol

It's interesting how despite him bullying him (quite badly seeing as though he beat him up) he's still like yeah but he saved my life and that means he deserves to be remembered

My bro didn't save your life on purpose, he was just trying to make it worse and happened to come to a terrible fate cause of that

I guess underneath it all he was still a kid who watched someone die, knowing they'd get eaten by a fucking spider, he still held him in some regard

The way he specified the guy was his bully even after he was being eaten though lol

He was desperate to get the book back? That's a leitner thing I guess, the book makes you want to keep it so it can finish whatever it wanted to do to you

On my relisten (which I will do once I've finished the series I'm sure of it), I'll have to look out for any reaction of leitners name

I wonder why Jon didn't react more to Carlos vittery's statement, like it must've terrified him? I saw a post a while back explaining Jon's thoughts and IT WAS GENIUS it was like of course he doesn't react, he must be terrified that someone knew about his experience and somehow did this to mess with him or it was a joke and he can't let anyone know that the Head Archivist is not Good at This ugh it's so good I'll tag it if I can find it

AHHHHH HE REGRETS DISMISSING THE OTHER STATEMENTS AHHHHHH

HE FINALLY ADMITS THAT HE NEEDS HELP WE LOVE THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT YES YOU FUCKING DO BITCH.

yeah at least he's right about Elias killing leitner

GEORGIE THE EX GIRLFIEND

ITS SO WEIRD TO SEE HIM ACTUALLY NICE TO SOMEONE WOW HIS VOICE CHANGES SLIGHTLY AS WELL HES LESS ACADEMIC

THE ADMIRAL

Awwww he's so cute with georgie

GHOST PODCAST GHOST PODCAST

THE WHAT THE GHOST T SHIRT IS CANON???? AHH THATS SO CUTE

Can he not go back to his own flat?? Did he bring all his clothes to the archive and then subsequently leave them there? Does he even have a flat??

God Georgie is so nice I would kill for her

It's so funny that an apparent supernatural cynic dated a ghost podcaster

WOW SEASON 3 OFF TO AN AMAZING START I CANT WAIT TO KEEP LISTENING IM GONNA TELL MY THERAPIST ABOUT THIS TOMORROW!!!

[weebswrites]

How do demon bros react to Solmare (their real "creator", not their Father) no longer celebrating their birthdays anymore?

The Demon Bros Reacting to Solomare Not Celebrating Their Bdays Anymore

A/N: This is such an interesting hc I love it >:)

Also I'm assuming this wouldn't happen for a whiiiile after MC dies, so they aren't mentioned. But if it's requested I can write a pt2 to this where it's just MC's reaction

Lucifer

• He doesn't notice at first, but as the day comes to a close and the celebrations his brothers had planned are over, he realizes

• Figures it was an oversight, or part of a greater plan

• Surely he couldn't have been forgotten...right?

• A few days go by, during which Lucifer limits himself to checking his DDD only twice a day for an event posting

• But when nothing happens, he begins to accept the truth he'd been hoping would never come true

• His birthday wasn't being celebrated

• He opens a bottle of his prized Demonus and locks the door to his office. It was going to be a long, sad night

Mammon

• He wakes up on his birthday and shoots out of bed. He can't wait to see what his brothers have gotten him, and what event Solmare has planned

• His brothers have a day of events planned, keeping Mammon so busy he almost doesn't have time to check

• When there's no celebration posted for his birthday, he wrinkles his eyebrows, but refreshes. Surely there's a mistake

• But there's still nothing

• He goes to Lucifer and asks if he's heard anything. Lucifer hides his concern and tells Mammon to be patient, that it'll probably be up tomorrow

• But days go by, then weeks, and there's nothing

• One morning, when he checks for an event even though it's been nearly a month since his birthday, he cries

• He's been forgotten. That, or deemed unimportant and unworthy of celebration. He hasn't been alive that long, right? People still love him, right?

Leviathan

• The first thing Levi would do upon waking up on his birthday was check what Solmare had created for him

• But this time there was nothing

• He checks on his second DDD, then his computer, before hesitantly walking to breakfast

• His brothers start to cheer when he enters, but quickly notice his softened demeanor

• "Hey guys, do you see anything posted from Solmare?"

• They all check their phones, during which Levi says "I think my phone wasn't working or something this morning"

• But one by one his brothers look up from their phones, glancing between each other as they all come to the same realization

• There was no post

• Asmo quickly hugs Levi, then walks him to his breakfast throne. He promises that even though there wasn't anything posted, they were all going to have a great day celebrating. Solmare be damned

• And it was a great day. But Levi had to up the level of happy he appeared, until he closed his bedroom door at night and silently broke down, sobbing into his pillow at the cold sense of abandonment

Satan

• Satan always acted like he wasn't that interested in what Solmare did for his birthday, but really, it was one of his favorite parts

• He wakes up, showers, and checks his DDD to see what had been done to celebrate him

• There's a flash of confusion before he realizes what happened. There was no post. He wasn't being celebrated this year. Anymore.

• He throws his phone into the couch, of which the pillows had been created by Lucifer to catch anything thrown into it safely

• So many feelings. Hurt, abandonment, and raw sadness. He felt so, so sad

• He didn't know what he was going to do, but he didn't have to decide, because there were many loud knocks on his door, accompanied by Mammon and Levi telling him he had to come to his birthday breakfast before Beel ate it all

• He sighed, glancing to his DDD before deciding to leave it behind. He opened his bedroom door and stormed by his brothers, brushing off their questions as they walked to the dining room

• He refuses to talk about it, but knows the moment Levi notices and slowly begins telling the rest of them what happened

• He's pissed, but deep down is grateful to have his brothers to keep him from holing up angry in his room all day

Asmodeus

• Tries to joke it off by saying he was too beautiful this year, and any picture or celebration would simply attract too many demons to him

• But deep down he's hurt. Not as deep down as he thought, though, because Beel asks if he'd seen that Solmare hadn't posted anything, and Asmo broke down

• Beel holds him, apologizing to Asmo even though he had nothing to do with it, and promising him that even though there was no post, he was definitely one of the most loved demons in the Devildom

• "You're sure?" Asmo sniffs

• "Definitely" Beel says, "Now come on, there's cake waiting for you, and your biggest fans along with it"

• Asmo smiled, thankful for Beel's comforting words and the love he knew his brothers would always have for him

• He tells his brothers what happened with Solmare when he and Beel reach the kitchen, and they all erupt with curses and dismissals of Solmare

• Anything that doesn't appreciate their Asmodeus isn't worthy of their energy. Even if it's Solmare

• Asmo has a hard time accepting it, but knows his brothers wouldn't lie. He lets himself be wrapped in their love and affection, and tries to move on from the crushing news

Beelzebub

• He usually forgets to check Solmare's celebration for his birthday, and this year was no exception

• During the chaos of breakfast, Belphie checks. And then he checks again. And then he asks Levi to check on his phone, just in case

• Levi grimly shakes his head, confirming what Belphie was afraid of

• Mammon notices the interaction, and asks what's going on

• Belphie didn't like that he had to tell Beel with everyone else listening, but that was really his only choice now

• He turns to Beel and still directs the news to just him

• It takes Beel a moment to realize what Belphie said. What it means. And why he's so upset by it

• His brothers notice his shoulders sink, and his head fall between his shoulders

• Their hearts break with Beel's, and they spend the day making sure Beel knows just how celebrated he is

• He's able to forget for the day, but when he's in bed that night, he stays up late with Belphie talking about what it means and how he feels

Belphegor

• Despite being the only brother allowed to sleep in on his birthday, he's still woken up earlier than he'd like by an overly excited Beelzebub

• Which is definitely a strategic choice by the brothers. They know Belphie would never say no to Beel

• He rubs his eyes as he trails Beel downstairs, but is confused when there's a moment that his brothers just stare at him with sadness before they hide it and begin their yelling

• He accepts hugs from a few of them, and once he sits down Beel presents him with a mostly full plate

• The bros keep the conversation flowing, but Belphie finds his chance to ask about earlier when Levi asks what he wants to do first

• "I want to know why you all looked so sad when I walked in this morning"

• There's another moment where no one knows what to say, but Lucifer quickly steps in and explains

• "Oh...okay" Belphie responds, still processing. "Hah, that sucks"

• His brothers try to cheer him up, but the knowledge that he was either forgotten or skipped weighs heavy on his heart for weeks to come

[bedtimegiraffe]

My personal ranking of the the LI's reactions to the upcoming battle

I know I would be a damn mess about all the near-death experiences and want to talk about it. So I've ranked all of our love interests by how well I think they handled your character's obvious trauma!

Starting with the worst...

Pros: Mal, I appreciate that you don't want me to die and want to protect me.

Cons: My guy. My actual primary love interest. I get that you're depressed. I appreciate the honesty. But this is just more pressure! Now I'm responsible for both of our lives!

Pros: Aerin, it's nice that you're not also freaking out. Not about this anyway. That is reassuring. Fighting for the people we care about and each other are strong motivations I can get behind.

Cons: You do not at any point ask if I'm okay. Maybe you don't realize how bad things have been, or you feel like you have no right to ask. And I also don't love 'we might all die tomorrow' coming out mid-make out and immediately before asking if we should take things further. You can just make the offer! Don't act like you wouldn't be into it regardless!

Pros: Valax, I appreciate that you want me to fight back against you. The fact that you wish things were different makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. There are some big obstacles here and I acknowledge that. And you apologize for causing some of the trauma!

Cons: I don't love the energy that we can't figure out a solution. I get that you're very stuck in one way of thinking, but this seems like a great moment to figure something out other than 'We'll wait and see which one of us dies.'

Pros: Nia, I'm very glad you don't want to lose me. And I appreciate the acknowledgment that something might actually manage to kill me this time. I'm perfectly happy be scared together.

Cons: This scene is mostly about making her feel better. Which is fine, a lot of them are. And it's partially MC's fault for not having an option to say, "I'm scared too." But not my favorite.

Pros: Tyril, this is some solid reassurance. You'll be there with me. I'll gladly take that as comfort. Just being with me is probably the best thing to do. It's very practical and in-character.

Cons: I'm slightly confused how you thought armies worked prior to this, but we can get into that another day. As always, you could stand to ask about my feelings more.

Pros: Imtura, I love you. I am so enamored with the way you acknowledge that we could die while not being worried about it. Incredibly reassuring once we get into it.

Cons: You're not in a place to be 100% supportive because you've got your own stuff. But that's life! Overall, excellent work.

Screenshots for illustration purposes taken from Neckrone Shen's very good 4 parallel playthroughs of Blades on youtube. Because these games are so dang hard to replay when I have an idea. I hope using screenshots of someone's posted playthrough is acceptable? Tell me if it's not!

[alchemicaladarna]

Little tangent about my journey with the QSMP fandom <3

First, I'm going to preface this post by saying, I wouldn't have been interested in the server, been introduced to so many communities, languages, and cultures, if not for the eggs and the admins. So, I initially gained interest when I saw a lot of people posting about Tallulah and.... Misclick duo (lmao) so I decided to check out what everybody was talking about mid-April 2023.

I watched Philza's April 29 VOD- "last" day of the eggs. Absolutely loved Chayanne and Phil planting potatoes because of Phil telling stories about Techno. Cried like a baby after. So now I'm invested.

I downloaded Twitch the next day, in time for the Brazilians' arrival. My main pov continued to be Philza, so I was a Crow for quite a while, mostly into the summer. I started watching Cellbit when the mystery really started to ramp up by the end of May.

Then Bobby died and everyone's reactions made me sob for like, a week.

Summer was probably the most time I've had fun watching QSMP. I don't know why, but it was such a good era, despite the discourse about elections lmao. I began to gravitate more towards watching Foolish's pov and when Jaiden began streaming every day, I had her as my main pov as well. Shoutout to the doozers and Jaiden mains <33

Then, Tina and Bagi arrived and I began religiously watching them as well for, uh. Reasons 🏳️‍🌈 XD. Got invested in Bagi's lore and then everybody became really busy during October so Bad and Bagi were pretty much the only ones consistently on the server XD.

Then, and only then, did I hear little whispers about q!Badboyhalo's soul vultures and possible death? And I got really really interested then. And that's where the Ghostie era started lmao. Up to now, Bad is the only person I'd watch consistently and keep up to date on his lore because well, after the soul vultures arc and especially Sweet Despair, you can't really go back to anything else after that you know?

Of course, without the QSMP, I don't think I would've discovered/re-discovered so many wonderful streamers like Fit, Tubbo, Étoiles, Mouse, or Baghera to name a few.

The past few weeks have probably been the shittiest and most anxiety-ridden weeks for me ever. But, I don't want all the negativity and anxiety to overshadow what was, for me, THE most special and unique fandom experience I've ever had. The QSMP is such a special project, there's no doubt about that. I want that to continue.

So, if this post can offer any sort of positivity and relieve some of the dread we've all been feeling, to any person from any community, that would mean so much to me already.

Send love to and the utmost kindness and care to any and all ex admins, and continue to show your support for the current admins too please. It will take a long time for this to be resolved, and it's terrifying I know, but all we can do is support each other and wait.

Remember to always take care of yourselves and no matter what happens, it always rains before you can see a rainbow right? So, in other words, things will become worse before they can get better. Idk what will happen with the QSMP, but know that life becomes better eventually. No matter the outcome, you'll be ok. We'll all be ok. <333

Edit: oh my god I just realized qsmp 1st anniversary isn't tomorrow. Today is the 20th djrjtbrbebd

There's still 2 days but um everything else I said is still true XDDDD

[luviestarz]

txt 𓇼

lonely hearts - txt ot5

tomorrow x together is just a local band hoping to make it big. you’re just a lonely barista who runs a radio show for said band, earning the title as their biggest fan. lonely hearts is just a sketchy match-making website looking to scam people out of their money… or is it?

juunnies masterlist (txt)

wooyukh masterlist (txt,nct)

yeostars masterlist (txt)

beomglocks masterlist (txt)

lattegyu masterlist (nct, txt, enhypen)

txt - another member likes their girlfriend

txt seeing you in a bikini for the first time!

TXT REACTION — posts with all of the members included, listed below by title.

sunghun masterlist (enhypen, txt)

koishua masterlist (nct, txt, enhypen)

beomiesz masterlist (txt)

flwrkisses masterlist (txt,bts)

hykai masterlist (enhypen, txt)

chaerypop masterlist (txt)

cursedsunoo masterlist (enhypen, txt)

tyundere masterlist (enhypen, nct, txt)

nyangjjunie masterlist (txt)

enluv masterlist (enhypen, txt)

iyeonjuni masterlist (enhypen, txt)

boba-beom masterlist (txt)

moonandsunwoo masterlist (txt)

planetdream masterlist (txt)

;- ꒰ °habits they developed in your relationship ꒱

⤷ lovesick boys who can't help but fall deeper in love with you

txt for the 'how they give you the partner privilege'

tyunni masterlist (txt)

jakekgs masterlist (txt)

♡ — TXT ACCIDENTALLY CONFESSING TO THEIR CRUSH !

bbhyeoliskook masterlist 2020 2021 2022

TXT TAKING CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU’RE SICK

reactions to you calling him by another member’s name [txt]

reactions to when their s/o backhugs them [txt]

beomglocks' prompt masterlist (txt)

stay alive // yeonjun

yeonjun and gn!reader are targets for their powers and they’re running out of solutions. all yeonjun wants is for y/n to stay alive, yet everything always comes with a price and secrets always come out.

first dates with txt

[ ᴄ.ʏᴊ ] | 𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗽𝗶𝗰𝘂𝗼𝘂𝘀

yeonjun wants you, but all you can see is how tired he is

poutybinz masterlist (txt)

Professional Pleasure (M) - yeonjun

The adult entertainment industry has its pros and cons, often being paired with partners you have relatively no chemistry with and having to fake the most pleasurable experience a woman can have just to secure your rent money for the month. Hopefully your luck would turn around one day.

first love — series masterlist (soobin)

3raaaachachacha masterlist (nct,txt,enhypen)

you call them your friend when you're dating with all of txt

jeontaeil masterlist (txt)

“thank you for the flowers!”

you thank them for a bouquet of flowers, assuming it’s from them..turns out, it’s not.

soobin with his chain dangling in your face !

perv!tomorrow x together

[txt] you being the 6th female member !

♡ — KISSES ! | TXT

their favorite place to kiss you

stranger things beomgyu x fem!reader

jealousy, jealousy - soobin

soobin isn’t one to get jealous easily. Or, at least express it openly. But there’s only so much one can hold back before it just erupts.

02:53 AM (choi soobin) - nsfw

blowjob - beomgyu

oblivious; csb

dom!soobin x sub afab!reader

gamer beomgyu with a discord server

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ txt waking up without you the morning after

( 8:55PM ) looking at you makes choi beomgyu feel stupid.

a night to remember — choi beomgyu

beomgyu takes you out on a lovely date to his old workplace and after hours of having fun, neither of you are quite satisfied. too impatient to wait till you get back home, or to his car in the least, you don’t think twice before getting down and dirty right then and there. at the end of the day, how many people can proudly admit that they’ve fucked in a trampoline park? 

csbinnie masterlist (txt)

the only exception ♡ beomgyu

you were not the type to believe in the existence of love. until you had to spend the rest of your summer with a distant relative whom you’ve never met your entire life, in small town with an ocean view, where fate had brought you a boy whose eyes shine brighter than any stars in the night sky. and maybe, just maybe, love does exist.

jungwnies masterlist (txt, bts, enhypen)

iichaeyj masterlist (txt, enhypen)

[10:23 p.m] - soobin

GAMER BF !!! - yeonjun, beomgyu

yn had a small book & school related youtube channel. she is introverted and doesn't have many friends. suddenly one day she gets a message from an unknown number who ends up being youtuber!yeonjun who owns a gaming youtube channel, asking if she can help him study for his upcoming psychology exam.

[verosvault]

🚨 Spoilers for Fantasy High Junior Year Episode 5 | My Live Reaction Commentary! 🚨

I saw @halevren do an AWESOME blog about their episode thoughts and I was also typing my live thoughts during the episode and decided to post mine as well! 😆😆🥲🥲👍👍

Legit help! It's 5am. I have work tomorrow and I can't freaking sleep cause I'm SO ADRENALINE- ANXIETY-THOUGHTS FROM THIS EPISODE! 😭✋

I love how funny episode 5 is starting off 😂😂

Brennan like..."no after bit???" 😂🤣💀

"Can she even run?" 😂😂

THESE CAPTIONS!!!

[KITSCHY MALL MUZAK]!! WHAT?! 😂😂

OMG! THE DOME IS SO PRETTY?!! 😱😱

I'm SO STUPID BECAUSE ONE OF MY EARLIER THEORIES ABOUT THIS MALL FROM THE FIRST TRAILER FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR WAS THAT IT WAS AN UNDERWATER MALL CAUSE EVERYTHING WAS SO BLUE!!! 😂😂🤣🤣💀💀 EITHER AN UNDERWATER MALL OR LIKE...AN ICY MALL! 🤣🤣💀💀

OMG!!! ALL THE PUNNY MALL NAMES!!!:

-"THACO BELL"!!!

-"OCHRE JELLIOUS"

-"BARDS & NOBLES TOMEVENDORS???"

-"ARMOUR ZOMBIE & LICH"!!! 😭😭😭

Those spiky red things SCARE ME SO BAD! 💀💀💀💀

IT'S SO GOOD THAT- CAUSE WHEN I FIRST SAW THE TRAILER FOR FHJY! AND IN LIKE EPISODE 2 WHEN CASSANDRA HAD SOMETHING SHARP AND RED IN HER BODY OR IT WAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT WHEN SHE WAS TALKING TO KRISTEN! I WAS LIKE "OMG! THOSE RED SPIKY THINGS FROM THE TRAILER IN THE BATTLE!" AND I THOUGHT IT WAS A DUMB THEORY BUT I WAS FREAKING RIGHT! 😭✋

Bro! This battlefield is insane!!

Cassandra is so mad 🥲🥲🥲

FIG'S COUNTERSPELL! RIP!

OMG! 😂 A GLEAMING ASTRAL SURVEILLANCE EARPIECE! CRYING! 😂

BRENNAN! WHAT DO YOU MEAN A SIGNIFICANT D4 ROLL AND IT'S A 1 AND THAT'S GOOD?! BRENNAN EXPLAIN PLZ RN!!! 😭😭😭

CASSANDRA IS SCARING ME FRRRRR!!!! 😭😭😭😭

Hmmm I'm wondering if the goal here is to try to get that sharp red thing out of all these people it went into? Or if they just kill the person? Cause it's like..these are technically innocent people...right???

KINETIC JAUNT!

FABIAN'S AC GOES UP TO 25?! 😱😱😱

OH DANG! THAT 13 IN THE BOX OF DOOM FOR LOU TO NEVER HAVE TO ROLL FOR FABIAN TO JUMP ON FURNITURE EVER AGAIN WAS SO BRUTAL! 😭✋

OH NO!!! IT'S KALINA'S TURN!!!

RIZ'S MINI LOOKS SO FREAKING GOOD!!!

YOOO!!! NAT20 STEALTH FROM RIZ!!! 😱😱

I LOVE HOW THEY PLAYED RIZ'S THEME SONG OVER HIS TURN!! I LOVE RIZ'S THEME MUSIC SO BAD!!! 😭😭✋✋

I love how Riz is just flossing with also the look of the MOST CONCERN EVER ON HIS FACE 😂 But he's just dancing and pretending to be happy 😂🤣💀

Ally constantly emphasizing that they knew nothing about D&d when they made their character and that they're stuck with a character who has a -3 to Dex 😂🤣💀

I LOVE CONOR COUNTERSPELL! 😂👏

NOOO KRISTEN!! ;00

ALLY ROLLED A 0 INITIATIVE! CRYING! 😭✋

Poor Conor Counterspell! 😭✋

Wait! This is what Ragh's Mom absorbed?! 😱 Bro! Zac is SO FREAKING SMART!! 😱

Zac's always the player to figure stuff out yet he always plays like- the dumbest characters 😂😂💀💀

KRISTEN'S NAT20 TO PERSUADE CASSANDRA!!! OMG!!! 😱😱😱

Why is Brennan getting up?! 😭😭

YAY!!! CASSANDRA IS HEALED!!! YAY!!!

"We gotta honor NAT20s. It's the rule of the show." 😭

Dang! Steel wind strike does a lot of damage! ;0

".... SHRIMP????" 😂😂😂 EMILY IS LOSING IT!! 🤣🤣🤣

NOOOO!!! THE SHRIMP!! BRUH!!

OMG NO WAIT!!! CASSANDRA HAS A SHRIMP ALLERGY?!

WASN'T LITERALLY EVERYONE IN THE ADVENTURING PARTY EPISODE FOR EPISODE 4 LAUGHING ABOUT HOW A SHRIMP PARTY WOULD BE THE THING THAT WOULD KILL CASSANDRA?!!!!FORESHADOWING MUCH?!!!! 😭😭😭😭

NOOOO!!! CASSANDRA IS STUNNED AND ALLERGIC TO SHRIMP!!! 😭😭😭

NO CAUSE I KEEP REPLAYING THE SHRIMP SCENE CAUSE I'M SO UTTERLY CONFUSED AND WORRIED!!! 😭😭😭😭

Fig is wagging a finger at the fire elemental! LOL!! 😂💀

BRUHHH MURPH SAYING THAT THIS IS RELATED TO GILEAR!! BRUH!! WE'VE BEEN KNEW THAT SINCE EPISODE 1! 😭

LOL TO FIG SAYING SHE THINKS SHE NEEDS TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL 😭😂

WAY TO GO CONOR!! 😂😂

FIG SEES A VISION OF WHAT?! HUH?!

"IT WAS NOT YOURS TO TAKE"??? HUH??! WHAT?!?!

ADAINE NAT20 ON ARCANA EXCITEMENT!!

OMG FIG'S VISION!!! 😱😱😱😱

NOOO!! CONOR!!! 😭

OMG!!! NO!!! KALINA!!! ;000

WHY DID SHE SAY RAGH'S NAME?!!!! ;0000

I'M SO SCARED!!! PLEASE TELL ME KALINA ISN'T EVIL AGAIN!!! FREAKING SOMEONE TELL ME PLEASEEEE I'M SOBBING!!!! 😭😭😭

OH NO! FABIAN WANTS TO STAB KALINA!!! 😭😭😭😭

Oh he missed even though she still casted shield which was weird

NO KALINA!!! GET AWAY FROM CASSANDRA PLEASE RIGHT NOOOWWW!!!! 😭😭😭😭

FREAKING WHYYYYY NOOOOOO

FREAKING WHY?!!!! WHATTTTT??!!!

I'M SO FREAKING STUNNED

THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY!!! NO WAYYYYY!!!

KALINA'S EYES WENT RED!!! OMGGGGGGGGGG!!! CAUSE THE RED FREAKING STARS IS RAGGGEEEE!!!! RIGHT?!!!!!

OMG I'M GONNA DIE!!!!

KALINA WHYYYY!!! WHY WOULD YOU SLIT CASSANDRA'S THROAT?!!!!!

NOOOO I'M PISSSEDDDDD!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!

NO THIS IS PISSING ME OFF NOOOO!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭

KRISTEN'S GOD IS DEAD AGAIN!!! 😭😭😭😭😭

KRISTEN IS GONNA FAIL JUNIOR YEAR AND HAS TO GET HER BACK!!! NOOOO!!!

IT'S RIZ'S TURN!!! PLEASSEEEE!!!

CASSANDRA PLEASE!! I'M BEGGING YOU DON'T DIE PLEASSSZSZZZ!!! 😭😭😭

MURPH SAYING "I'M SO SCARED OF KALINA"!! BRO SAME!!! BRO SAMMEEEEE!!! BROOO SAMMEEEEE!!! 😭😭😭😭

BARDIC SHRIMPSPIRATION!!! 😭😭✋✋

OH NO!!! THAT ONE NAT1!!!

Gorgug still has Zelda's mixtape!!! 😭😭✋✋

Kristen hugs Cassandra! 😭🥺

Oof! Box of Doom! 🥲

Dang!!! Ally didn't succeed on ANY of those box of doom rolls! 😭 but I really liked the choices Kristen made and what she did! ;((( it was still really powerful and brave and strong....the choices Kristen made of what to do ;(((((

BRENNAN!!! WHY IS YOUR FACE LOOKING LIKE THAT!!!!

NO ADAINE FAILED!!! WHAT'S CIRCLE OF DEATH?!!!!

I'M SO FREAKING NERVOUS FOR REAL!!! 😭😭😭😭

OMG I'M SO SCARED

OMG YES!!! THANK GOODNESS FOR ADAINE BEATING THE DC ON THAT COUNTERSPELL!!! THINGS WERE ABOUT TO LOOK FREAKING GRIMMMM!!! 😭😭😭😭

I'M SO CONFUSED!! WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!?!?!

BLOCK LETTERS YES?!?!?!?!?! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

I'M SO SCARED!!! WHO AND WHAT IS THAT VOICE REACHING OUT TO KRISTEN!!!

I'M SO SCARED!!!! 😭😭😭😭

I'M SO CONFUSED!!! I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS HELP!!!

YESSSSS!!!!! A NAT20 FROM FIG FOR THE SHRIMP JUMP!!!!

I LOVE FIG!!! 😭😭😭 SHE'S SO AMAZING!!! 😭😭✋✋

BRENNAN IS WEARING "THE SHIRT" NEXT EPISODE! I'M CRYING!!!

I'M CRYING SO BAD!!!

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO FEEL!!! I'M SO FREAKING SCARED!!! 😭😭😭 WHY IS FANTASY HIGH SO SCARY?!?!?!? 😭😭😭😭

[headlamprey]

Sooo today I made a trip up to the Franklin Mills mall to try to do a survey with my friends, then hang out while there. I NEED to post about this, because OMFG I was not just immediately misgendered but then purposely misgendered multiple times by the staff at the survey place!!?!! They were SO INCREDIBLY RUDE!!!

The front desk lady didn't want to deal with me at all. I walked up and immediately she said Oh, we don't have anything for females. I was like thats fine because I am not a female!

This definitely messed up some circuits in her brain, because her original reaction was to IGNORE ME while going about her other business.

I stood there, waiting for her to come back to talk to me. Agh! but she was very clearly trying to pretend I didn't exist. So I asked, Hey so you don't have anything for females but I'm not a female so could you explain what's going on right now? Could you please explain? And YES I ASKED "Is this because I'm queer?"

She went over to her manager who was RIGHT NEXT TO ME and loudly misgendered me while saying I was complaining about being non-binary. Which, no, that is not what I was even doing, I was asking a question. AT A SURVEY PLACE. ANYWAYS. She continued to misgender me very loudly for well over a minute so I piped up with a Hey by the way you are still calling me "she"! More being ignored while now both of the employees of this place are PURPOSELY MISGENDERING ME?

I really was there just asking questions and waiting on friends and having these people be incredibly callous and smug and rude within a few feet of me. The manager did absolutely nothing besides be rude and the entire experience was so fucking CRINGE.

I left without causing a scene cuz uh. I really just wanted to eat ramen with my friends. Since the survey people decided to be transphobic ass hats, my one friend did pay for me thankfully.

Still, this shit makes me sick.

AND I KNOW LONG POST BUT

1749 Franklin Mills Cir #159, Philadelphia, PA 19154

That is the address where the two transphobic employees freaking treated me like shit on the bottom of your shoe.

Feel free to fucking bother these people, they were really awful and need to learn you can't just BE LIKE THAT WITH PEOPLE OMFG.

I'm tired as hell so I'm going to look more into it tomorrow, I don't think they should be allowed to treat people that way, and I'm glad it was ME since I'm a hardened old bastard myself. But seriously, if you are considering trying to get a few bucks? This place mostly just wants white "men". Oh yeah, I noticed that too. Since I was being ignored and standing around waiting to have a conversation, I had the time to notice a lot. Seriously, fuck them, I'm goin to bed and I will be kvetching about this a lot more later 😤😤😤😴

[ignyxdaughter]

𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈 - 𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐎𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐒

(𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 /𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐤𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐳𝐨𝐯𝐚 𝐱 𝐤𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐞𝐥𝐬𝐨𝐧)

MASTERLIST

READ ON WATTPAD

A/N: Hey, everyone! How are you? Firstly, I want to apologize for the long delay. I let you down by making you wait for just a chapter, so I came back with two — one for today and another for tomorrow. I hope you enjoy them. Also, although not posting, I have seen and read and reread every note of yours. These were literally the motivations that took me back to writing, so thank you to everyone who's been reading, liking and commenting in the fic! I can't express in words how much you are important to me! Finally, I was gone for a while due to personal reasons. Honestly, I was a mess and, because of that, had to take some time for myself. But I am better now and have found pleasure in writing again! I think all I want to say is: take care of yourselves — mental health is really important — and remember that you are special; you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are💕

A/N: The Darkling's memories which have Baghra are made with quotes from "The Demon in the Wood", so it totally belongs to Leigh Bardugo!

A/N: English is not my first language. I’m gonna mix the books and the tv show to make the story line clearer (I read soc, the grisha trilogy and its tales). I don’t own Shadow and Bone and TO/Legacies characters; they’re, respectively, Leigh Bardugo, L. J. Smith and Julie Plec. Also, this is how I think the Darkling is,and some of the events will be changed due to the story's course!

word count: 4942

warnings: mentions of suicide attempts, self harm, death and witch hunt

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

The shock on her face increases, for once not knowing what to do. Katherine can only stare at The Darkling as he talks. She hears a few accusations — truths — about her killing Malyen Oretsev, but doesn't pay attention to any of that, since the thought that occupies her head is that everything is not making sense. Kirigan created the Shadow Fold, he's The Black Heretic; he surely was chased by many otkazat'sya in his life, including tsar Anastas guards, and seen with his own eyes other Grishas fighting against each other for survival and then brutally dying. It's impossible that he hasn't seen any change in Ravka after the creation of the Unsea, that he hasn't seen his country beginning to have more peace and haven for his people. So why does he have the desire to end the Fold?

Only an idiot would want that, and she knows that Kirigan isn't one.

"Do you have something to say about all of this?" The witch is able to finally hear clearly an entire sentence from him. She blinks a few times to concentrate on the General's stern face and look at the dark brown eyes that are fuming with rage.

"What really is your plan?"

"The one that you possibly ruined forever?!" He yells at her, all his patience gone.

"Anastasia said that Ravka before the Fold's creation was a complete disgrace." Katherine blatantly ignores him. "Supernaturals and Grishas lived in dread of being accused of practicing small science or magic, of getting persecuted, tortured and killed. Or worse, of having someone they love find that destiny!"

The Darkling clenches his jaw in indignation. Katherine is close to discovering his true intentions, and he doesn't know what her reaction will be, because expanding the Unsea would probably break magical balance, which she so fiercely protects. "Who's that woman?"

"Someone older and cleverer than you and I. But she doesn't matter to this conversation. What matters is her saying: that the Fold reduced the number of mortals defying and sentencing our people, and even protects Ravka from the war against the Fjerdan and the Shu Han." She approaches him with a pointing finger. "Your creation, Kirigan." The woman pokes her finger on his chest, which slightly pushes him backwards. "Your bloody creation did that! So why fucking end it?!"

"You ruined my plan!"

"The plan that would bring disgrace into my people again? Yes, I ruined it, and thank the Ancestors that I did it!"

"My plan would strengthen Ravka!"

She chuckles. "Oh, yes, by giving all the power to an inexperienced lightscum."

Lightscum, as if Alina's power was something to be disgusted about.

Of course, the General heard from Genya and the Sun Summoner of how cold Ms. Anya, the handmaiden, was towards the latter. They used to say that she seemed annoyed whenever Alina was close and never talked to her unless she asked something. For a brief moment, he recalls a conversation with the younger woman in which she said that Ms. Anya had never shared a smile with her and was only second to Baghra in rudeness because she hadn't beaten her with a stick... yet.

At the time, The Darkling thought the issue was jealousy or contempt over a Grisha. However, now he knows that it can't be the latter, since Katherine is a witch, but at the same time, the first option doesn't seem right. The shadow singer's voice at the mention of Alina was of grudge instead of anger, and this isn't typical of jealousy.

Now it was his turn to let out a small mocking laugh. "You really think I would give all the power to her?"

"Of course you would! Her light blinds you till it destroys you! That's what they are: traitors."

"Alina is too young to have the mind to betray her kind." Kirigan has to gather all of his strength to not ask all the questions he wants the answers to. Of why Katherine truly killed Malyen Oretsev and why the name 'lightscum' for who has the power of light, of what happened to her when she was taken away from him, of how she got here and discovered he is The Black Heretic... He truly wants to know the witch, all of her; body, heart and soul. But there's a specific question that his whole being screams for an immediate answer — he wishes to look at her eyes and say 'are you alright?'. However, he feels it'll be better to wait until Katherine blurts out everything that's inside her head to then fulfill his desire.

Cheshire told him this morning to listen to her before acting, and that's what he'll do. After all, to gain this woman, he has to understand her.

"She hadn't been with her kind until a few months ago! No matter how much time she spends with Grisha, she will always prefer the mortals because they were who raised her!" Katherine's last string of patience runs out. Without being aware of her uncontrollable behavior, she starts yelling in rage, every concealed thought of hers pleading to be freed. "And even if that weren't the case, she would be capable of treason because that's how lightscums are: fucking snobs who only care about themselves. For you to have a glimpse of how much they lack character, they have a habit of stealing other lightscums' power for themselves, so that they are more powerful and have no competition in the way. I've never known one worthy of loyalty, mainly because everyone I've given the slightest bit of trust has stabbed me in the back!"

"I'm sure Alina is not like that."

"Stop defending her!" The General raises his eyebrows as she shouts in english, the shadows in the woods increasing and turning the place darker with all the fury she's feeling. Wrath took her completely, till the point she cannot control her powers and translate her words into ravkan. "I am a trickle in the middle of a river of them and they took every inch of happiness I have had from the beginning! My lightscums breeders used to beat me until I lost conscience, and those two wenches that were born along with me used to call me horrendous names. Years after I left and found a family, they took some of them from me. I know that because the man who whipped my back uncountable times was the lightscum who helped in the plan to kill my aunt, my uncle and my father. MY BLOODY FATHER!"

The Darkling's heart clenches in his chest while hearing these confessions; his mind, a mix of sadness and anger. Sadness for knowing how much Katherine has been hurt in life, and anger for those who dared to do that to her. These feelings only increase when he sees tears wetting her eyes. A stab in his guts would be better than witnessing these beautiful light green orbs full of sorrow.

"He was the only one who never judged me, and they killed him." Her knees give way to the freezing floor, weak from having to hold the weight of a heartache that was stuck inside her for decades, centuries, even. "I tried—" She takes a deep shaking breath to recompose herself, but fails miserably. "I tried to meet other lightscums, but they always betrayed me. The result was countless assassination attempts and lovers and friends approaching me out of interest only to turn their backs on me after I didn't give them influence in the Supernatural community."

"Katherine—"

"After so much effort for nothing, I concluded that they are scums! All of them, no matter what!" Finally, she faces him, which makes him see how wounded she still is with these horrible events. Saints, if he had the power to go back in time to kill everyone who helped on breaking Katherine, he would gladly do it. "You want to know why I killed your tracker? Because I'm fucking TIRED! I'm tired of being mistreated for having shadows. I'm tired of being replaced by a lightscum and seeing others live the consequences of their actions. But you know what I'm really tired of? To see my people suffering."

A shiver runs down through the witch's spine by what she is going to say next, for once, not caring about the Shadow Summoner's rejection. After all, she was classified as second place the moment when he choses Alina over her. Now, the only things that matter to Katherine are regaining Agatha's memories and protecting the Supernaturals and herself from two certain Grishas.

The Darkling, because he is the person who Katherine has fallen for and the mind behind the plan of destroying the Unsea. And Alina, because she is the puppet that will concret the plan.

"So don't expect me to do nothing when their safety is threatened." Her voice fails a little from physical and emotional exhaustion. "I will do everything in my power to leave this Fold intact and let that lightscum away from an amplifier. If you want to give her the Morozova stag, the sea whip and the firebird for her to produce magic, you'll have to pass through me. And believe when I say that my shadows are loyal, and will always protect me."

A fragment of her still screams to be freed — the one who wants to ask why would he destroy his greatest creation — but she conceals that part inside of her. It's not the time to question that, not yet.

Shock is expressed all over in the General's face. His dark brown eyes are widened; his eyebrows, raised; his mouth, slightly agape. He thinks of all the ways the witch could have discovered this, until he concludes that the most accurates options are through confidential conversations in the Little Palace or by rummaging through his chambers. However, none of them make sense. The first, because Kirigan never shared with anyone the plan to go after the other two amplifiers; the second, because he is sure that Katherine has only been in his room once, and on that day she was reading a page which had notes only about the Morozova's stag and, on the corner of it, the name 'hanging tree' was alone, without any explanation underneath it.

The Darkling opens his mouth to demand how she found out his intentions, but closes it as soon as he remembers the first time they had a real conversation. He woke up earlier to return those ludicrous books in Norse runes to the Little Palace's library just to then see 'Ms. Anya' carefully reading the Latin titles. Though what really caught his attention that day was the old red book on her hands, one with a worn cover and light brown pages from its use.

Katherine read the Istorii Sankt'ya. His Istorii Sankt'ya, which later he found out that she made notes on its final page. Katherine's wisdom, however, never seems to fail him, since all the scratches were written in Norse runes. So even if he wants to read it — and the Saints know how he tried —, he can't, because he doesn't understand the language.

He has to urgently find a translator as soon as he gets back to the Little Palace.

"My book."

The witch scoffs by hearing the realization in his voice. "I'm not a fool that cannot see through the images, Kirigan. The page with the Morozova stag, the sea whip and the firebird was opened on my lap as I learned about amplifiers. It took me a single look to question what would happen if a Grisha had more than one."

"Have you told—" He stops when she shakes her head, his heart racing as fast as a horse as she speaks again.

"Nature didn't make Grishas' body to handle magic. Even if they manage to practice it, they can't control it. You must know that." With her jaw, Katherine points at the Fold behind her. "Did it hurt when you did it? Had you felt you were going to die in agony?"

He takes a deep breath, as if the action would encourage him to confess. Finally, after what seemed like eternity, The Darkling says: "Yes."

Her answer is a simple nod, while her eyes fall to the ground in shame. "I've broken many magical balances in my life. All of them hurted, and in all of them I begged to die." Kirigan can feel his heart clenching as she tells him the truth, not wanting to imagine her in a breakdown worse than now. "I'm not proud of these moments, but they were from a time when I couldn't stand breathing anymore. Have you ever felt that? The need to just... end it all and rest forever."

He thought that so many times, but the most remarkable one was when tsar Anastas' guards murdered Luda in front of him.

He wants to say that to Katherine, to guarantee that she's not insane to have such thoughts, but he knows that only his experience won't prove anything to her. Therefore, instead of exposing his feelings, he states: "It's impossible to be an immortal and not think of that. You're not alone."

This makes the witch go into a trance, remembering all the times she tried to end herself. Silent tears run down her face as she realizes that she's had these sick thoughts for ages and that in no time they seem to go away. Of course, she also has good memories, but they are useless when sorrow gnaws at her, especially when it's related to her father. Elijah Mikaelson was the most special person in Katherine Morris' life; he gave her a home, a family, made her feel loved and comfortable with her own powers. His death made Katherine lose any sanity that kept her on her feet. No matter how many times the shadow singer tries to forget, she will always remember that the first magical balance she broke was while practicing necromancy in hopes of bringing her dad back. She almost died during the countless experiments, and actually succeeded in resurrecting some people, but never her father, nor her uncle Klaus or her aunt Hayley. Since they died, their bodies were nothing more than ashes running through the wind. If only these ashes were kept on an urn, maybe she could make another successful necromancy.

But they aren't, so these Mikaelsons will continue dead and the witch will have to deal with grief for eternity. However, there is still a place where she can reunite with them: afterlife. It didn't take long since Katherine started her attempts to end herself.

The woman looks at her forearms, at the permanent thin white lines she made in order to stop the grief and intrusive thoughts. "You sure?" Her voice trembles and her heart clenches by remembering such a dark period of her life.

"I am." The General reassures her with a soothing tone, wanting to calm her and prevent another breakdown.

Taking her silence as a cue, Kirigan moves his fingers and summons a tiny shadow. The small piece of darkness floats around his hand before he guides it towards Katherine.

The air in her lungs is gone as soon as she feels something putting a strand of hair behind her ear. Her eyes look at her side to discover what has done this, but has no success, since the shadow is long gone. However, she faces the Grisha in front of her just in time to see him summoning another piece of darkness. He doesn't break eye contact as he releases the shadow to repeat the action with another dark brown lock of hers. The corner of his lips are twisted in an almost imperceptible smile. Almost.

"You're not alone, Katherine, and even if you were once, I won't let that happen again."

"You aren't able to do that."

"I am. But for that to happen, you have to let me in." Kirigan notices the darkness in the woods slowly coming back to normal, letting him see the place clearer. This is a sign that his plan is working. Calming Katherine down to then approach and hold her was indeed the right path to follow. "Let me know you and I'll let you know me. That way you will never be alone anymore."

The woman gives him a small smile when his shadow slightly touches her face, the tension on her shoulders instantly vanishing. It felt so good and relieving that she wants him to feel the same. Katherine then conjures a small piece of darkness and releases it towards him, making it circle his face.

The Darkling chuckles a little, enchanted by seeing his equal using her powers, and his heart skips a beat when she says: "You're not alone either, Kirigan."

The General wants nothing but to be close to her and hold her in his arms right now, however, he knows that the witch will easily be shocked if he does that without warning. So he slowly approaches her, analyzing her confused expression till he carefully sits by her side on the freezing snow. Kirigan makes sure that Katherine can predict every movement of his so that, if she gets upset, she can stop him. But she doesn't move, not even an inch away from him. The woman just observes as he unbutton his black cloak and cautiously places it on her shoulders, the heavy clothing instantly warming her cold body. Yet it's not only her body that is warmed with Kirigan's gesture, since her heart almost melts to see such tenderness coming from the most feared man in the country.

Then, without looking away from the witch's beautiful light green eyes, he whispers: "I don't want to end the Fold."

Katherine swears that she literally felt the air leaving her lungs. "W-What?"

He raises a hand at her, a silent request for her to listen to him without making any interruptions. She looks at him expectantly, ready to hear everything with as much attention as possible. So he tells her all: how he spent his whole life hiding with his mother, moving from village to village without even having a chance to interact properly with those his own age. The General lets out a rueful laugh as he briefly reveals his childhood fear of forgetting his real name, as each season both he and Baghra had a new identity.

'It's my own name I'm afraid of forgetting', he used to say to Baghra, and she would always tap his chest and draw the letter A on it. A of Aleksander.

'Your true name is written here', she would suddenly speak softly. 'Tattooed on your heart. You don't let just anyone read it.'

And he believed her in that till nowadays. Even not needing to hide his true nature anymore, he still conceals his birth name from the world. It's his most well kept secret; no one but he and his mother knows the truth. However, he is willing to extend this secret to one more person just for the incessant desire to hear Katherine say 'Aleksander'. Just the thought of hearing her calm voice calling to him makes his whole body shiver with lust.

Kirigan also tells the witch of his attempts to peacefully end prejudice against Grishas, that the formation of the Second Army was just that. With a heavy heart, the General also mentions Luda, a lover from centuries ago who he planned to run away with, but unfortunately was murdered before his eyes by royal soldiers.

Finally, The Darkling reveals that the famous story of the Black Heretic is partially true. He indeed tried to create his own army using merzost, but the motive wasn't out of thirst for power, but for revenge; resentment towards the injustice against Grishas and the desire to make a safe place for his people was all that crossed his mind at the moment. He always had that dream. Luda's death was just the push that made him fulfill it once and for all.

"The Fold protects my people from persecution and from the war." Kirigan lets out a tired sigh. "If I destroy it, I will doom them."

There's a moment of silence between Katherine and him, the quick and meaningless thoughts hammering the witch's head, who tries to put together all the pieces of the puzzle. After failing miserably, she has the courage to say her doubts out loud. "So what do you want to do? Why do you need to amplify Alina's power?"

The General's dark brown eyes meet her light green ones. "You're clever enough to find out, Katherine." She frowns, confused. "Why would I need to use merzost on the Fold?"

You ruined my plan! He yelled at her in rage. My plan would strengthen Ravka!

You really think I would give all the power to her? Kirigan let out a mocking laugh after she said that Alina would wield all magical power if she had three amplifiers.

Alina is too young to have the mind to betray her kind. He brushed Katherine's argument off as if he was sure that the Sun Summoner would never be able to challenge him, as if she wouldn't have the courage nor the strength.

I don't want to end the Fold.

A shiver runs down the shadow singer's spine as she realizes The Darkling's true purpose. Her gaze towards him transforms into shock. She opens her mouth, only to close it later due to shock. After a minute, she finds herself able to shake her head, almost pleading that her hypothesis isn't real. "No."

He only nods to her in response, glad that her wise mind discovered his intention without him needing to speak it out loud. "Yes."

"You want to expand it."

"It will protect my people even more."

"But you'll be hated by the mortals. You'll create another hunt. Grishas will be persecuted again, Kirigan, and so will be my people."

"I will have the power to stop them. No one, not even the tsar and the First Army, will dare to confront us."

"And what will happen to the Grishas that oppose you, who will prefer the Ravka of now instead of your idealization?"

"That won't happen."

"It's stupid of you to not even consider that not everyone thinks the same." Katherine grabs him by his black shirt lapels, wanting to shake him in order to bring sense to his body. "The majority of your army is young! They haven't lived the terror that Ravka once was. They hate the Black Heretic and live in the utopia of a better world without the Fold! If they see you attempting to expand it, Kirigan, they will witness a magical imbalance! They will fear you and your reign, and soon, start a revolution."

"I will be powerful enough to stop them."

"Power is good, but you must know when to stop wielding it, because it will destroy you if you have more than you're able to control."

He shakes his head in disbelief, his mind scolding himself for never seeing the possibility of his plan failing. "No, you are wrong."

"No, you are wrong!" She tightens the grip on his lapels, forcing him to look at her eyes more deeply. "You will destroy everything with that plan of yours. You want power? Take it in the most discreet way!"

"There's no discreet way, Katherine!" The Darkling abruptly separates them, standing up and running a hand through his dark hair. Saints, he's becoming frustrated! "Your people are free; they don't obey anyone because they hide themselves from the otkazat'sya. But mine will only be safe once that fucking tsar is gone!"

"Then do a bloody coup!" The witch shouts while standing up to face the General properly. "If you want the Lantsovs gone, make powerful alliances and discreetly turn people against them. The Second Army is already not fond of them. The Grishas just need a little more to finally hate them fiercely." She slowly approaches him without breaking eye contact. "You are stronger than the king's army; can easily take them down. So why not invest in this coup, which will unite and strengthen your Grishas, instead of expanding the Fold, which will destroy all conquests you've already achieved for your people?"

The woods now are almost without light, exasperated shadows of both Kirigan and Katherine darkening the place. However, the latter slowly fades away as the witch takes deep breaths to calm herself down. The silence between the two equals is tense, but the woman's sharp voice cut it like a blade.

"Find me when you give up that insane plan of yours and your brain finally comes back to your head."

The Darkling's dark brown eyes follow her as she walks towards a tree's shadow and, without looking back, enters it. After a moment, he goes to the same tree and tries to feel her in the darkness, but she's gone. Katherine has literally teleported herself through shadows.

────────── ★ ★ ★ ──────────

3 days later — Os Alta, Ravka

He can't sleep.

Tonight's the third night since his argument with Katherine, and also the third night in a row when he finds himself pacing around his room instead of sleeping. He is exhausted, mentally and physically; the witch has made a place in his head without permission. All he can think about are subjects that include her. Is she alright? What happened to her when she was taken away from him that day? Will she ever come back? Is her plan really better than his? Is expanding the Fold indeed worth it?

Finishing his glass of kvas in an only sip, Kirigan suddenly gives up to fight his needs. He abruptly picks a paper and a feather on his messy desk — full of research about magical imbalances and historical revolutions — and writes the message that will make Katherine search him. It's short, yet meaningful. The witch will certainly understand it.

The General slams the feather on the desk and looks around his room, carefully analyzing each shadow inside of it. When there's no sign of any movement, he finally speaks: "I know you are here! Appear now and deliver this message to her!"

The shadow of one of the armchairs near the fireplace moves in answer. Soon, a certain dark creature shows up to him, its big sharpy smile widening by seeing the paper on The Darkling's hand.

"I need to speak to her." With heavy steps, he approaches the monstrous figure. "Make her come to me no matter what, Cheshire."

The paper is taken away from his grip by the shadow, which nods in response before disappearing again. Kirigan makes his way to pour another glass of kvas and comes back to his bed, which is full of books and papers. He spends this night in the same way he did on the other two: by searching for more information about The Handler and rereading countless times the contract he made with Katherine, both of their names now stained with their dried blood.

[minniepetals]

hiii dearest author! I got ill, so I wasn't able to send a reaction about the recent update (my mind is quite foggy and typing in proper english is challenging me rn...I'm a bit conscious with my grammar and stuff 🫣) buuuut seeing that long ass ask/ criticism about your work fueled me up to send this ask 🤧

first, I want you to know that you're doing great! I've been with you as a reader for over a year now, and all the waiting is honestly worth it.

second, I hope that comment won't deter you from your writing. If anyone finds that your story is not their cup of tea, then don't drink it. Just stop?

third, I might be getting too defensive because I'm just really riled up rn hahaha life outside tumblr was being a bish and when I checked my tumblr, I saw that long ass post... you don't do that to my fave author 🤨 I haven't thought about cmar y/n being an angsty teen or what. Maybe it comes with experience (and what I've studied), but some people can really be emotionless when you push them too far.

Lastly, NAKYUM!!! I won't say too much jic some didn't read the long ass ask, but can I just say that I hope Y/N finds an ally with alexander? I know karl's his son...but we can hope, right? Alexander seems to be sensible and would be a great ally 😅

---

Thank you for updating yesterday! I'm treating it as a birthday gift again 😅 (my birthday's tomorrow tho). This is my 2nd birthday with a cmar update 🥰

first of all happy birthday!! i hope your day goes wonderfully with nothing but sweetness and happiness because you deserve nothing but the best.

i guess i understand a bit of the criticism but it's as you said, if it's not your cup of tea, don't drink it. sometimes i read something and come to love it until the characters make certain decisions that don't really resonate well with me so i just stop reading it to keep my blood pressure leveled lmao. i mean obviously cmar isn't for just anyone but it does kind of get a bit old when people criticize my y/n for the way that she is and she can't really fix that because of the circumstances in her life.

like in the beginning, someone complained about y/n a doormat and letting everyone walk on her and that she should just stand up and grow some confidence. and now it's being said that she should stop wailing in her pain all the time and just get to the healing part already and it just puts me a bit off guard because like...in the real world, you can't just...pick yourself up because you want to? that's not how things work? and writing things unrealistically is a little....not really my cup of tea when it comes to dealing with trauma and stuff.

also i had a bit of a fear a few months ago when i thought cmar was gonna get to at least 30 chapters because there may be people who don't like long series and the wait being too much for them but honestly i don't really care anymore. at the end of the day, they don't have to read it and wait, you know? and i've had almost everything planned out since i decided to make cmar a series so i'm not gonna cut out certain things just to satisfy people because personally for me, there are certain things that needs to be addressed before y/n does head off to her healing arc.

if people don't wanna wait, they don't have to wait.

if i make alexander into an ally, our girl's gonna have big international connections oop- 🤭

[simpingwriter]

Cal Kestis x Kyra Yarmot

'In the Name of Love' Pt.4 (1/2)

A/N: guess this one got too long oops-

I'm writing this all on Google Docs and unfortunately they got a word limit for Spellcheck. And I got carried away with this chapter, so for the sake of at least some grammatical editing, I had to split this one up to two parts. Maybe even 3ish, depending on how easily I can end the 2nd part of Chapter 4 because a bomb is getting dropped in that part...

I will post the 2nd part either still tonight, if I got enough fuel left, or tomorrow afternoon.

Enjoy (pls and thx :) )

Word Count: approx. 3000

___________________

When you first set foot, or feet, onto the Bardottian Market – well, one of many, to be honest – you felt a totally different atmosphere to the one from yesterday.

Calmer, more civilized…less dirt.

And much less people, or the path was just bigger, letting it appear less packed than the other one.

"Wow, I can't hear a street fight around the next corner of these stalls. The other one…well", in the other one, you wouldn't have just heard the fights happening, chances were high you felt the blood of the one losing splatter onto your face when you choose to be stupid and pass directly by it.

And it was not exactly rare to end up in one yourself either, from totally not personal experience.

You nod in agreement while getting busy with scanning the stalls selling their farms' produce. The meat choices looked like their prices would put a miniature black hole in your wallet. But they also made your mouth water, knowing you couldn't afford them was like plain torture.

"Wait…over there. A Blue Milk Stand." Cal calls out excited – drawing some critiquing looks onto yourselves in turn, all quickly deterred with you snarling at them –, pointing like an overjoyed toddler towards said colorful stand, pulling you after him, giving you not much choice but to stumble after him, him to 100% oblivious to your suddenly heated up face.

The direct hand contact didn't make you blush yesterday…so why now??

"For a minute, I was worried about even finding Blue Milk all the way on Bardotta, since Banthas aren't part of the natural fauna. But I guess they just…shipped…them here??" That would probably be the case…

You weren't really sure either, shrugging once he let go of your now almost clammy hand again, still none the wiser to your very sudden reaction. Why should he, you dragged him through the streets hand in hand yesterday as well and didn't bat an eye at that moment of close contact.

Hell, you almost karking straddled him when you met and didn't react like this on the inside! Probably because of your peaking adrenaline fogging up your thoughts at that time, but who knows.

Holy karking bantha shit, you totally did straddle him...oh makers...

The blush that was on its verge of disappearing again, shot back into your face as your tried to shake the pictures from your head, at least for now.

"Okay, got the milk…can cross that one off at lea-... Kyra, you...okay there?" Instead of waving his hand in front of you – remembering the almost accident today – he simply poked your shoulder, barely getting any resistance back at first. But it did the trick. "Y-yeah? Oh, you already bought the blue milk?" "While you were occupied with daydreaming, yes. Are you really sure you're alright? If you don't feel well, I can finish the list myself, there shouldn't be that many any…ways…oh...oh no..."

He stopped himself as he looked down at the list written on a sheet of paper. You, curious, also took a glance.

It wasn't exactly what you would call small – not in your vocabulary at least –, the list.

Baffled, he clears his throat after a few moments of taking in the small list, "I stand by my words though, if you're not fe-" "I was just preoccupied with my thoughts for a moment, Cal. I'm fine, honestly." You assured him as you slipped the list from his hands to take a better look at it while he carefully put the milk bottles inside the backpack you decided to carry when you went out.

You became more than used to having to carrying heavy gear since you used to carry your entire life of clothes and resources on your back – before Cal found you of course – so this wasn't going to break your back just yet. Dragon People once were supposed to be "working animals", your whole evolutionary line filled with traits to do and carry a lot of work, be it holding out extreme lengths of bloody wars or just farm work.

Sometimes though, you had to question if you have really gotten all these traits. Sure, you could carry a lot of stuff for a long period of time…but you had your limitations on that and they looked awfully human and fragile for your heritage, if you looked at the apparent feats they had accomplished centuries ago...

"Is Cere sure we can find all these things here?" You scan the list over and over, some standing out to be bound to certain planets and their cultures. Mentally, you skipped over those after making sure you wouldn't find them here. It shrunk the list not by a lot though.

"We all wrote stuff on it freely, we never know when and where we get to restock…so I don't think so. We just have to try our luck with most of them."

You now mentally list the things needed on them:

Pack of paper

New Tool harness (Cal)

Chewstim (Cal and Merrin)

1 pack of vacuumized Stimcaf (Cal)

3 packs of vacuumized Coffee

2 packs of Chocolate Cookies (Greez)

Huge amounts of various cooking ingredients (Greez)

Synthmilk (no name)

Gatalentan Tea (Merrin)

Gesha Tea (Cere)

Karlini Tea (Greez)

10 bottles of Water

Pack of Toilet Paper

…

"By the makers, I think we need to go twice, alone because of the water bottles, the backpack isn't even big enough for that…" Cal mutters irritated at the list, shaking his head, some more unkept locks of red falling into his face, "Why didn't they all come with us?" He said quietly to himself, but you caught it just all too well, keeping quiet anyways. If someone whispers, they probably didn't plan for it to be heard. So you play none the wiser…again.

"That's fine with me…but the more important question…who the hell put Synthmilk on there?!?"

Tried it once, puked once. That stuff was the karking worst you had put into your mouth at that point. Sure, later you would have to take that back, finding out what a bowl of Gruel that went bad from standing in the way too humid air of Gelgelar for probably…hours...tasted like. Hadn't gotten out of the refresher for actual hours either.

"Don't know, but I guess we'll just get it? If we even find it. Never had it myself, so you might need to help me with finding it." "It's absolutely not worth the credits…but yeah, let's just buy it. And even if just to find the nasty ass culprit." Walking away from the Blue Milk Stand, Cal laughs at your pure and unfiltered hatred for Synthmilk before taking the list back from your claws, saying it must be oh so very heavy for you. What a jokester.

Jokesters get pushed. The pusher gets pushed back. In the end, you're both dizzy, laughing like idiots as you stumble down the market paths.

You're both just childish, but you could very well look past that for such good company as Cal.

While he had to hide his lightsaber higher up under his Poncho, you were still left without yours, it being another thought doing extra and extra rounds in your head at night. You needed it back. But you didn't even know where that Karker went with it, if he even still had it or if he long sold it. And where the possible seller went or what they did with it.

With your great – absolute bantha shit – luck, it's been taken apart, its pieces and your kyber crystal out on the black market for the highest, most certainly dubious bidder…

"You're missing your lightsaber…" How did he- "You have been staring at mine all morning…I just didn't find the right time to mention it." Oh, yeah…that does make sense.

"Sorry for that… It's just…it was taken from me in a moment of weakness, Cal. Not just that I lost it bothers me…", it kept reminding you of the fact that you lost in that encounter with an enemy. It ate at you, like a damned parasite, you couldn't even keep your lightsaber safe, not even THAT.

How were you supposed to keep those apparent Force Sensitive Children safe if you ever found them? There weren't many adult Jedi left that could teach them the right way…

And just for the sake of…of whatever was left of the old Jedi Order, you should not be one of the people to continue the teachings. You never used to like following these stupid rules too much yourself.

Not to forget, the dead Council would twist in their not-too-nice graves if you would teach them. You were taught partial Dark Side Arts by your late Master, if anything, you would've been a traitor to them if they had ever found out what happened right under their noses.

Squinting at yourself for slowly losing total track of your busy train of thoughts, you sigh out, shaking your head dismissively, "I can't keep hanging myself up on it, I know that myself, you don't need to think that for me…because i know you are.".

You just wished for at least a sliver of a clue to its current location, or even its last…

"I will do anything in my power to help you find it, Kyra..." He promised to you, an almost pained but a certainly strong expression on his freckled face, "Since I'm guessing yours also belonged to someone you once knew." Of course it did, you…you weren't trusted with your own yet at that time, left with a stupid training lightsaber when the attack happened, unable to hurt even a bug with the weak blade the Kathracite in it would create, unlike the actual Kyber Crystals.

Or Bondar Crystals, oh boy. For the, ehem, "shock value" as your master used to joke.

They really weren't fun to get hit with but indeed a shocking experience, to not get sliced to dragon meat dices on immediate impact....

"It belonged to my master…" even more why you needed it back.

Its the last thing you had left of him. The last physical thing. His unusual teachings would never leave your head, his stories of his adventures of crossing the Galaxy before becoming a teacher for Younglings and Padawans like you and his own, very special ways of explaining his points of view always kept close to your heart.

"So just like mine?" The whole time while you went to talk about your lightsabers, you had to remember to tone it down a lot more than usual, your eyes constantly busy making sure nobody in the crowd stood out for being with the Empire. Or even a local was enough right now, this being Bardotta.

During that, you chipped a good portion of the list off, the backpack growing heavier and heavier by each stall you passed. Until Cal unfortunately interrupts your well flowing conversation, seconds after you told an absolutely horrible joke you heard from an old companion of yours, Cal choking at the punchline to a point you had to help him cough his water back up, "Wait- Wait…I think we really should get some of the stuff back to the ship now…" He looked at you and the backpack with an amount of worry you hadn't felt being laid upon you for too long.

It weirdly enough felt really nice, knowing that for once, not everyone thought of you like some unbeatable and inexhaustible creature - even if it was just him. Well okay, with the way he liked to shamelessly admire your nonhuman parts, you couldn't be 100% sure he didn't think you're a creature at least to a certain degree.

"Sure. But no big talky talky breaks with Merrin and the rest, it's going to get dark sooner or later. Bardotta gets cold at night…" you turn on your heels, having kept the way back to the ship somewhat memorized, holding back a laugh as Cal took a moment to realize you actually agreed to his plan instead of arguing, stuck in place, brain buffering like a terrible HoloNet connection, yelling for you to wait for him as he jogs back up to walk next to you. "Well, not that cold though…I'm sure this place looks really nice at night, i mean, look at all the lights around the stalls!"

He was right, there are alot of fairy lights strewn about…

"I don't know…it does sound nice. But, well…" you rub your arm in embarrassment, remembering the undoubtedly incredibly childish teasing back in your not-too-long-ago childhood. Even though you should've grown out of that memory by now. "I get cold real easily…i wouldn't want to ruin this for you with my constant shivering…I'm sure Merrin wouldn't say no to it though! She would be thrilled to see them as well!"

The two of you had nearly left the market as you unexpectedly got stopped by Cal, eyebrows uncharacteristically knitted together as he looked down to you, just a head taller than you, thinking about what to actually say for a minute.

"She definitely would, sure. I definitely could, sure. But I want to get to know you a bit better. Without Greez panicking every two seconds about you devouring him head to toe in his sleep and Merrin interrupting me." He let go of your shoulders, hands falling back down to his sides, something you didn't even register as you were busy staring up into his eyes. The eyes you, without any filter whatsoever, called pretty yesterday before heading to bed.

And you would never take it back. They were pretty, especially in addition to his overall handsome face…wait no!

"Also, please don't worry about feeling cold, if you really got such a bad problem with it. I meant it when I said you could get some of my Ponchos as well, I guarantee you, on BD, there is a warm and cozy one under them!" Immediately BD seemed to almost glare at Cal in disbelief and you didn't know how you discerned that from his usual "expression" but you're sure he was, a small and muted beep that translated to 'Rude' was the only thing he had to say.

As you continued walking, him telling you with passion about all his favorite Ponchos, the one he wanted to show and gift to you specifically, you felt a weird tug at your heart. All the time, you had been so so lonely, the loneliness eating at your live conscious at some nights, you nearly forgot what it was like to have someone actually caring for one and their personal opinions, for their wellbeing even. After a certain event after the purge, you never had spent long enough with people to get to know them, for them to get to know you, neither did it ever matter, all having been short acquaintances solely to get you from Planet A to Planet B. Or C. Or D.

None of them even bothered to ask about you…and with the kind of people you had to travel sometimes, you were very glad about that.

Why was it feeling differently with Cal then?

Because you knew you would stay with them for a while? Because you wanted to stay for a while?

Cal stops at the front of the raised door of the ship, using his comm link to tell Cere that you were back with the first things on the list for now. The door opened quickly, letting both of you back onto the Mantis. After waving a quick 'hey' to Merrin – while also informing her of having found her requested Tea – who was reading a book in the living room, you left the backpack leaning against the couch, hoping at least someone felt inclined to unpack it.

Cal didn't give you lot of time, keeping you to your own words a few minutes ago and already went to usher you back to the quarters in the engine room you shared, teasing you about the fact that you told him to not waste time with talking to the others for too long.

BD, who was until a few minutes ago, surprisingly quiet during the whole trip, hopped off his shoulder to stretch his small legs, a chuckle quick to follow from you, "Since when do Droids need to stretch?"

'Ever since I only get taken to boring missions!' He beeps back irritated before quickly resuming his place back up higher. This time it was your upper back and shoulders as he beeps quickly, 'Quick, take me on an actual adventure, oh pretty pretty Kyra!'

Rummaging through his drawer, Cal scoffs playfully at BD's theatrical request, "You say it like we don't get nearly shot dead on sight on every second planet we decide to set foot on! I would call that pretty adventurous..." He mumbles the last part with fake hurt in his voice.

'Those aren't adventures. Those are eventual death traps…'

From his mention to their danger, your thoughts went to the eventual first real mission for you on the Mantis. Well, would've, weren't it for Cal's thought-puncturing shout, "HA! Found it! This one should be perfect for your little dilemma!"

In his hands he held a nearly white poncho, some grey scale specks over it. The inside looked not just insulated, you were sure you saw some warm fur coating poking out at the folded edges. A cold climate poncho. Clearly not perfect for actual subzero regions…since it was a karking Poncho for crying out loud, but it would be great for cold nights on normal planets.

You wondered where he got it from, your hands naturally going out to grab it from his. A short, yet unexpected brush of his own hands, slightly roughed up and a bit dry from training, sent immediate shivers down your spine and your first "most logical" reaction was to let go of the Poncho in shock, hearing it drop to the ground with a muted thud. For a moment he was about to say something before just smiling at you. "Sorry, thought you had it already, slippery fingers I guess!"

Was the redhead aware of the sudden skin contact and your increasingly stupid behavior today and he just... played it off…or did he really not notice when you pulled your hands off of his like he physically burned you? Which wasn't possible by the way. Dragon People were almost all "fireproof".

You wouldn't make matters worse, nodding at his comment, "Happens sometimes if you got fingers like mine." Wasn't even a total lie, claws were sometimes difficult to do certain things with. And you couldn't even shorten them by a lot, blood vessels starting to run through them at some point. "I think they look…" He stops himself to think, looking at them intently while he crouches down to pick the thick Poncho back up, "I think they look not just cool. They look good on you, they suit you...a dragon without claws would look odd though, wouldn't they?" They definitely would, it was one of your main defense or offense tactics after all.

For your comfort's sake, he seemed to notice that for some reason, he left the conversation subject at that for now, walking back to the main living area with you once more. The backpack was luckily actually empty again, so without much of a break, only to quickly take a sip from the water bottle you took for yourself during breakfast today, like you warned him and he teased you, you once more left the Mantis to go and buy the rest of the list.

And just like you predicted, night came in quickly. Very quickly. Only three hours later, the sun had nearly fully set, only a few of its rays left scattered across the ground as it disappeared behind a distant snowed in mountain.

Now the streets were only illuminated by the Bardottan Moon and street lights. But also by one third important thing, the sole reason you stayed out this long anyways.

Before you even had the chance to start shivering, also like you predicted, Cal took the liberty to take the Poncho from the backpack's strap from its current place on the ground where you put the once again heavy object for a short break. You weren't able to get your question about 'what he was doing exactly' out when he was already carefully placing the poncho over your head, taking note of your wings and horns – trying his absolute hardest to not accidentally brush against the later after your very obvious reaction about them yesterday.

A small sheepish wave when your head popped back out on the other end of the opening woke you from your trance, staring in surprised awe at him, "Hello there, welcome to comfy town." He sang, a bright undoubtedly happy smile on his face, using your moment of needing to mentally hard reboot yourself to reach for the backpack himself this time, a huff leaving his lips.

Back to reality, you're about to protest about him carrying it, when he stops you with his single-gloved hand, telling you it was alright if he carried it now. He was strong as well after all, not like you, but he wouldn't break and fall apart like the plastic brick toys you both apparently got to know after a heated discussion about them this morning. You vaguely remember the name Jego, initial envy playing a big part in those memories. Envy you had to swallow as a Padawan back then. Until you got a set on one of your sparsely celerated birthdays, a gift from the commander of the Clone Troop that served under your Master.

"Come, stop daydreaming for once. I wanna see the lights…we won't get this much time everyday for a while now, so we should enjoy it while it lasts. Or while the rest don't actively collect us to leave again of course." Once again, as if automatic, his bigger hands found yours. It also – once more – sent more shivers down your scaley spine, feeling your wings subtly react to said shiver as well. But you left your hand right in his anyways, the warmth radiating alone from just his hands feeling incredible.

Getting to the nicely decorated stalls was even easier now, the shopping crowd gone now that the actual market was closed for the night. That only left you, other visitors and general off world tourists, all those that weren't already used to the bright lights basically lighting up the night on their own. Fairy lights were a weird thing, so small and yet they managed to bring so much simple joy to a whole mass of people.

All by just doing their job. By doing only as they were supposed to do.

"Look, those even change their color, Cal!" You point out to one in particular, the colors ranging from pink all the way to orange, the most vivid variations of the colors in between being showcased. It transfixed both of you almost immediately as you both had the same baffled expression on your faces, mouths hanging slightly open. "I…I never saw such things on the other planets…not the colorful ones at least."

And especially not at the Jedi Temple on Coruscant…

(To part 2 of chapter 4)

___________________

[sallysavestheday]

For my bored friend.

As a reader, I know your work quite well. It often causes a strong emotional reaction, whether it be sad or happy. But what do you like to read? Are there times of year, a mood, anything that influences what you want to read?

From the world of Tolkien, has there ever been a character you wished to include in a story, but the story wouldn't come to you?

Are you truly never revisiting The Flower and the Fountain? (Asking for a friend 😊)

If you had to write a story of a rare pair, who would it be?

As a reader, do you have a favorite scene/event in The Silmarillion, The Hobbit and/or The LoTR?

Post vacation workdays are never fun. As you know, this too shall pass.

One more for today, while I wait for the chicken to stew :). Thanks for these questions!

I love a good nonfiction read. Science or nature writing that has a lyrical tone delights me, and I enjoy memoir, particularly if there is some through-line about food. I love reading about other people's meals. I have spent much of my adult life bouncing around the world for work, but there are still plenty of places I haven't been, so I also look for memoir or travel writing that expresses a deep knowledge of and love for places and people who on the surface are very different from myself but underneath can be familiarly known. Which is an easy glide to fanfiction, isn't it? The strange made familiar and the recognition of self in a tale? And in my darkest moods, I return to the classics of my childhood. There's nothing like a well-written children's book to set your heart aright.

Reluctant Tolkien characters include Angrod, who must have some depths I have yet to discover; Faramir, who keeps teasing me but won't actually come out to play; and Finwë himself, the OG Problematic Spouse and Parent. I'd like to write him, because I enjoy digging into the meatiness of parenting, but I can't quite get my mind around him yet.

You will notice that I have not checked the "complete" box on The Flower and The Fountain! I don't plan to write any more post-Gondolin ficlets for them, but there are plenty of First Age moments remaining to be explored. They stand up and wave when they want to be written, never fear.

Taking rarepair suggestions...any you have particularly in mind? Egalmoth and Rog, my darlings, were your idea, and I am still very pleased with how that turned out.

Favorite scenes, hm. The mostly-reconstituted Fellowship resting at Isengard (such tenderness and peace and playfulness in between moments of horror); Fëanor's call to depart Aman (the language!! it makes me want to stand up and go, myself); the Nirnaeth (Aiya Eldalië ar Atanatári, utúlie'n aurë!...and they trod his banners into the mire of his blood, ow ow ow); any and all scenes in which hobbits cook (I said I loved other people's meals!).

Thank you again for the ask. I am much better fortified to face the wave of reviewing and editing tomorrow. :)