#can't promise anything for this month but

[ivesambrose]

𝑾𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

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The next chapter of your life indicates a period of discipline, structure and determination. Long term plans or goals instead of short term gratification. I feel previous months of stagnation, struggle and mental turmoil has led to you having the mindset of being rather unfazed towards anything because you have likely realised that regardless of what you 'see' you're in control. You've learnt to trust your intuition and inner guidance over anyone else. You might encounter power struggles in between but this will lead to emotional growth nonetheless.

There is a lot of joy, celebration and new connections to look forward to as well. It might seem like despite the good happening to you and what you've wanted for so long finally being yours, you feel rather defensive. Remember to push through despite past struggles. To fully be in the present and enjoy what you have and what you deserve. For some of you I do see you making really good friends but due to past experiences you're rather guarded towards them. The message I'm getting is that yes, do use discernment when dealing with people. Do establish necessary boundaries. But don't let promising friendships falter due to fears.

You can also expect your dreams to be more within reach, renewal and unexpected help coming through, the path getting clear when you least expect it, healing from mental strain that have remained unspoken.

Lastly, you will experience a balance in giving and receiving. This will be necessary when it comes to your material and spiritual growth.

The next chapter of your life calls for adjustment and change. Drastic ones. If it's causing you some tension know that this area of your life requires that change. You can't expect to step into the next chapter of your life otherwise. I see that this involves your daily routine, health, work, with opportunities of personal growth and recognition in those areas. You may also be stepping into a new role of responsibility that requires self discipline on your part. You will be pushed to focus on your physical health a lot more. So if you feel like you're getting sick often it's a sign to stress less about it and take mindful steps towards it instead. Be it getting a proper check up or holding yourself accountable. You don't have to rush anything however, improvement will happen gradually. Some of you likely just need more movement but not the kind that puts your body on overdrive. There will be rapid progress and sudden opportunities coming your way out of the blue, a lot of communication and even travel. Career wise, it's looking really good! You will also be transitioning away from a very difficult time of your life. You may also have new intellectual pursuits, you'd want to learn new things or will be acquiring a lot of necessary knowledge. you will also find yourself juggling many tasks or projects at once but this will lead to a sort of mastery over your life You'll be feeling rather accomplished.

The next chapter calls for self expression, communication as well as creativity however some challenges or conflicts might arise as you assert your individuality or learn to find your voice in new environments.

You can however, look forward to emotional growth, new beginnings in your emotional life as well creative expressions.

Steady and solid growth when it comes to your finances as well. Something that makes you feel like you don't need to rely on others and you have financial freedom so one less thing to feel anxious about that has possibly been weighing down on you far too much .

Once again, try not to over exhert yourself or you'll end up attaching the experience to something that should come to you rather smoothly. In other words, you really need to drop the mindsets of the people that have been projected onto you and have become your belief systems. It's time to make some of your own without losing sight of what you truly value.

You can also expect more mental clarity and better insights in regards to what to do, where to invest, your life's purpose and what truly brings you joy. But instead of running from it like you did before, you'll embrace it.

You might feel more drawn towards arts, aesthetics, cooking, gardening etc as well.

Having time and proper consideration towards things you earlier didn't have the state of mind for.

[tch8mnis]

why?

warnings: cursing, heart breaking angst, weddings, mentions of pregnancy. jude fucked up loool

word count: 1000

the sun beamed down on the beautiful girl in front of him. the long white dressed complimented her brown skin. the mix of different people sat only a few feet away from them, both of their parents in the front with tears in their eyes watching their children continue their love story since 12 years old.  the alter was beautifully decorated. the white peonies really stood out as it matched the flower in her hair. the 2 foot wedding cake stood behind the crowd of people with two mini figures of them standing on the top. jude made sure to get an extra small cheesecake though, because he knew that was her favorite. the birds chirping in the air was the cherry on top for this atmosphere.

so why did he feel this way?

this day was supposed to be the best of his life. tying the knot with his childhood lover was a big moment for him and her. he's been waiting for this day ever since younger him promised that they'd stay together forever back on the playground. today he woke up with a smile on his face, ready to make his lover a wife.

so why?

why did he have this dread behind his brown eyes? why did he suddenly feel this negative aura around him as the wedding officiant began his speech. why did he have the urge to run away? run away from reality. from his family. from the love of his life. 

he should be happy. fucking hell he should be buzzing. he should be over the moon with excitement. he loves her so much.

so fucking much.

then why?

he looked into the eyes of his girl. both their hearts full of lover. she pressed her lips together before opening her mouth to say her vows. he should've been listening. gosh he should've listened to her words. but that aching feeling in his chest made her speech go through one ear and out the other.

the officiant turned to him and indicated he said his vows. so he did. he memorized them for months now. he wrote them down on a piece of paper the day before he proposed as if he knew she would say yes. he guesses his instincts was right then because there they were standing at the alter. he read his vows 3 times everyday leading up to the moment. he put his heart and soul into those words. he didn't realize he was done speaking until he saw the tears roll down her face. those words had warmed her heart tremendously.

so why did it leave a bad taste in his mouth?

the officiant started speaking again but he didn't hear a word. a smile was plastered on his face. but why did it feel so fake? he felt himself start to tear up. but was it tears of happiness or sadness and dread?

gosh he felt so guilty. he was ruining this day for the both of them and he didn't know why. it wasn't on purpose. of course it wasn't. it just happened.

he wanted to stop feeling this way. this day should be filled with happiness for fuck sake. he needs to get his shit together and act right. he can't do this to the person he loves.

so why did he?

why did he feel his heart drop when he saw his lover say those two words. those two words that should've been the easiest words to say in his life but now somehow the hardest.

he felt all eyes on him, anticipating his answer. an insane amount of pressure on his shoulders. he should be saying "i do". he has to say "i do". both his heart and his gut was telling him to say "i do." he needs to say it.

why’d he say the opposite?

why didn't he feel anything when he saw his lover's face drop as her eyes went wide. why didn't he feel anything when she whispered that heartbreaking "what?" with more tears rolling down her face and her shoulders sagging with disappointment and embarrassment? why did he feel nothing when he heard the gasp of the crowd and met the heartbroken eyes of his mom who looked at him with disappointment?

he felt overwhelmed with the amount of eyes on him. so he did what he knew best.

he ran.

he rushed down the pathway covered with flowers and made his way towards the entrance of the ceremony leaving his woman behind with a bleeding heart.

he swore he heard a loud sob come from behind him and his heart broke even more but he convinced himself he didn’t and it was all in his head.

he pulled out his phone and texted his personal driver who arrived in no more than 90 seconds.

he sat himself in the back seat and the car immediately drove off. the driver asked zero questions.

the reality of what he did hit him 20 minutes later, still stuck in the back seat of a car. he was so stupid. so fucking stupid. he wanted to disappear. he felt so ashamed. but he still did it.

his phone made a noise. someone had texted him. he looked down and saw his brother's name. he opened the conversation and his heart dropped. it was one picture. one picture that changed his whole life.

the picture was of inside a box that was wrapped up. there sat an ultrasound picture and a stick that had two red lines on it.

his hands felt sweaty and his eyes went blurry.

that was one of his biggest dreams. to build a family with her. have kids and live in a big house to grow old with each other. that's what he wanted. that's what he always wanted. and he ruined that.

she was pregnant and he had no idea.

she planned to surprise him and he made her worse nightmare come true.

what the fuck had he just done....

and why?

authors note: i GENUINELY don’t know why i wrote this 😭 i was reading a whole lot of jude angst today and this idea suddenly came to my mind?? what’s wrong with me lmao IM SORRY 💔💔💔

request always open!

[entitled-fangirl]

Foolish.

Gwayne Hightower x reader

Summary: Gwayne’s wife feels self conscious after birthing their daughter.

Warning: body image issues, smut mention towards the end (there’s not smut but like there is so 18+ please)

A/n: based on an ask from forever ago!!

Masterlist

………………………………………

It had been almost five months at this point, and Gwayne was beginning to worry.

Her body had given him a precious little girl, and he wanted to praise her endlessly for it. Her recovery had went smoothly to his knowledge, no tears or aches from it at this point, and still he wondered why she had not initiated anything with him.

She was most likely skittish. She always had been skittish about this stuff, but he had hoped that she was not regretting their actions now that they had the consequences.

He sat in his solar, his mind plagued by all of these thoughts.

He scribbled at the papers but his mind was entirely elsewhere, and by the time he had to restart a letter for the third time, he gave up. Tossing the pen aside, he stretched out his aching shoulders and legs as he stood up to address the problem itself.

…

Y/n Hightower walked around the room, the babe rested securely in her arms as she swayed.

Her lips pulled up as she admired the babe. The spitting image of her father. Bright fiery hair to match the deep blue irises of her eyes. She was a sight to behold.

But it made her thoughts shift back to Gwayne. And immediately an unease of guilt came with it.

Five months she'd put it all off. The conversation. The rejection she knew she'd receive if she tried.

Before the birth, and before the pregnancy at all, Gwayne had proudly shown off his wife like a prized possession- a perfect thing that would make even the most well off lord jealous. He adored her with everything he had and he was happy to do so.

So pregnancy felt like a death sentence.

If she were to even live, how could Gwayne show off a woman with the scars and marks that she now was marred with?

She had lived, and now she bore the remnants of what their daughter had left behind. Marks of her body stretching, a loosening in her skin, her bones in her hips occasionally requiring attention. She had indeed recovered but she was not as she was before.

And she knew Gwayne would notice it soon.

"And how is our precious gift?" His voice echoed in the room when he stepped in. His hands were held behind his back, a sway to his steps.

"Oh," she sighed. "She's wonderful. Sleeping soundly."

Gwayne stepped behind her, his arms wrapping around her frame. She inwardly cringed. She was so scared of his mind in this moment.

But whatever she worried he may have noticed, he paid no real attention to.

He leaned over her shoulder to kiss her cheek, peering down at the babe. "She is comfortable with you. She knows how safe you are. I believe she feels what I feel."

The woman's brows furrowed. "And what's that?"

His voice whispered in her ear, "That you are the most wondrous woman in the realm, and she and I am grateful for you."

Just like the compliments he used to pay her. It's almost as if nothing changed. But she knew things had changed. So much had changed. It was eating at her.

That, and his wandering hands over her hips.

"Gwayne," she gently chided like she always did when he'd grow handsy.

"Why not? Why can't I enjoy my wife's beauty for a moment?" Hopefully he'd finally get an answer to her avoidance of him.

"You know what I'll say."

He sighed. He did know what she always said. 'Not today.' Not today felt more like a promise to 'Never again.' He hated to push like this, but he was getting nothing to help mend the bond, and he'd do anything to save it.

"You've been feeling well. The babe is asleep. We'll stop when you wish." He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I just want to admire my wife."

"You don't.”

Her answer was so swift. So sure. She fully believed that he didn't want to admire her pretty form.

"I do," he argued in confusion. He now stepped around to look her in the eye. "I promise you that I do. Why would I lie?"

Her eyes avoided his like hiding a deep secret. She used the babe like a shield, keeping her attention on the young child in hopes that Gwayne would drop the issue.

"Love?" He tried as he head tilted down to catch her eye.

It worked, and her pupils fixed on his. "It's complicated."

"It's not," he reasoned. "There is nothing complicated for us. We love each other about all else." A thought came over him. "Don't we?"

"We… we do," she drew out, almost like a question.

He was growing frustrated. "Please. Lay the babe down so we may discuss something of importance."

"Gwayne-"

"-Do as I say." It was a snap, one that Gwayne had never done to her. Not like that. Usually it was with a teasing grin or a kind smile. This one was of expectance.

She knew this was the conversation she had been putting off.

His rejection of her.

He knew this was the conversation he had been putting off.

Her rejection of him.

The two lovers felt the air around them grow cold as they simply stared at one another. How horrid it felt to be unwanted.

Gwayne was a merciful man. She knew that he'd have the heart to send her back to her father if this is how it would go.

But a life away from her child would be torture.

The destruction of her body. All for what?

"Alright," she mouthed, for no breath came from her lips.

With shaking hands, she placed the babe in the small bed Gwayne had spent the time to fashion himself. She recalled the curses he strung together when he had gained a rather deep splinter and she was the one to pluck it from his skin. And the night they spent after that. Seemed Gwayne liked to be taken care of quite a lot.

But she forced it from her mind. Now was not the time to reminisce.

When she turned from the crib, she saw the tears that pricked at her husband's eyes.

And how her heart screamed.

"Let us retire," he softly suggested. "I'll have someone look after her. Come." He held his hand out.

She took it, though it felt right, she began to question if it truly was.

The walk to their chamber was silent. But it spoke volumes.

Once inside, Gwayne didn't want to wait longer. "Your mind is so plagued. I wish you'd speak."

"Was is there for me to say? You're the one." Her voice quivered at her last declaration, "Just do it. Send me away.”

"Wh-Why would I do such a thing?" He asked in a horrified tone. How could she even think he would let something like that happen? His wife. His bright light.

"Don't pretend you haven't noticed it all, Gwayne. You're wise. You've seen the changes in me. I'm not the same prize you once had."

"Prize? What are you talking about? You're my wife."

"DO NOT PRETEND YOU HAVE NOT NOTICED IT ALL, GWAYNE!" She shouted at him. "I'm different now. And if you do not love me anymore, just say so!"

Gwayne merely gawked. Even if he tried to form words, nothing would have left his throat. Did she really think that? His blue eyes stared at her in confusion.

"Gwayne," she whined. She wrapped her arms around herself. "Say something. Please."

"W- You- I…" He stopped to regain his bearings, taking a deep breath. "I love you."

Her brows furrowed a bit. "You do?"

"Yes!" He almost shouted on accident. "Yes. Of course I do. And you…?"

Now the confusion turned to her. "I… I love you more than anything," she stated as if obvious and he was a fool for questioning so.

His head quirked to the side, then an amused scoff from his lips. His hands found their way to his hips. "Then what are we fighting over?"

"I've changed."

"In what ways?" He challenged.

"Well," her arms gave an over exaggerated shrug, like he should already know what she meant. When his stare continued, she huffed. "Just… my body is different."

"You've recovered well. Haven't you?" What started out as a statement turned to a worried question.

"As much as I can," she remarked. Her self consciousness was showing once again. She wished she didn't have to spell it out for him.

Gwayne's hand reached out to her hip, tugging her lightly to him. It was comfortable. It was normal. He had done it a million times before. "It seems the only fight happening at this moment is the one in your mind." He brushed another stray here from her cheek. "Tell me what fills that head of yours."

Her voice was a whisper as she looked at her husband. "I only think of you."

"And our little girl," he said with a quirk of his lips. "So tell me what thoughts you have of me."

"My body has changed too much for us to be as we were. You'd be so unhappy."

The thumb that was caressing the woman's hip bone paused. "All this because you believe I'd be unhappy with your body? Answer me."

A curt nod.

"You-" He sighed and brought a hand to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I had a bath set up but I think you need it far more than I. C'mon."

The copper tub sat on the other side of their room. He had ordered a servant to do so prior to him leaving his solar, and that had been a little while ago now that he thought about it.

When he tried to gently push her in that direction, she took offense. "What are you saying, Gwayne?"

"Love, I just meant… " he sighed, "Get in the tub.”

Even when frustrated, Gwayne had never led her astray and she hoped it would be the same now. She stepped to the tub, dipping her hand in to find that it was not cold. A decent temperature.

And when Gwayne went to pull at the laces of her dress, she panicked. "Wait!" She spun around to see his worried expression. Her hands grabbed his wrists. "I don't want to do this."

He frowned. "I've seen you bare before, my love. Many times," he remarked, a grin on his face when her cheeks flushed. "C'mon. Do this one thing for me."

"Was giving you a child not enough?" She sassed back.

He scoffed. "Love. You know what I mean. Let me wash you."

She studied him for a minute. "Fine."

Turning her back around, Gwayne unlaced her bodice and slowly helped her undress. As soon as her soft skin came to his view, he placed soft kisses on her shoulder and up her neck.

The sight of her shift falling to the ground made her stomach twist.

Gwayne knew her so well. Her hands came up to cover herself, but he caught her wrists quickly. He nipped behind her ear. "Get in."

He helped her in, kneeling down at the side of the tub. He took extra care to not look at her body in the water in respect to her. At least for now. His gaze stuck to her face and shoulders. "You foolish girl," he teased sweetly, His fingers grazed over her cheek. "Do you truly believe I'd leave you because your body gave me a child? Hardly. Hardly, woman."

She leaned into his touch.

"May I wash you?" He asked softly.

Her bottom lip tucked between her teeth in thought. A nod.

"Alright." He pulled himself around the tub to kneel behind her, pulling her hair over her shoulder to expose her shoulders and back. When his fingers ran down her shoulder, a shiver moved down her spine, making him smirk. "I dare to say that you've missed my touch."

"I think I have," she admitted.

Gwayne's rough hands handled her gently, rubbing the soap over her arms and shoulders gently before pausing on her chest. A silent question was on the tip of his tongue.

Her head leaning back. That was an answer.

His hand ran over her breasts and he took note of the way her breath caught each time. Swollen with milk for their daughter. It's true that that was different than before, but Gwayne loved it. "So pretty," he muttered under his breath.

His hands moved lower, moving down her stomach and over the small stretch marks across the skin there. He didn't pause. Didn't falter. He continued as if he didn't even notice them at all. He carefully washed her, taking his time and being extra gentle, muttering praises under his breath.

Lastly, his hand ran down the inside of her thigh, moving up to gently graze over her clit. She jumped, but a little groan came from her throat. She grabbed his wrist. "I need you."

Oh how those words affected him.

…

A few hours later, Gwayne massaged the oil onto her shoulders gently, pressing his thumbs into her shoulder blades in a relaxing way. He had massaged all of her at this point, and she was barely awake, the massage and the past few orgasms leaving her out of it.

He kissed her head with a grin. "Thank you, my sweet lady wife. For everything."

She only hummed.

How foolish of them to ever doubt each other.

…………………………………..

[ramblingautisticman]

(Okay, for some reason, the repost where I was talking about this just...disapeard?? So here I go. Again. I'm just going to post it as a separate thing.)

(Also, Warning, talking about child hood cancer, experimentation and torture, and the other general dark Logan or Wade things.)

Okay! So- obviously, with the timeline, it wouldn't work- but I can just change that because why not?

Imagine Wade being diagnosed with cancer at 8. He has chemo and some surgeries, then for a good 2 years he is cancer free. Of course, though, it comes back at around 11. There isn't anything they can do this time, though. The surgeries won't work, and chemo will only prolong the inevitable, so Wade has to accept his fate. His parents get approached by someone who promises to cure Wade, though. All they need to do is sign over their legal rights in regards to him, so that's what they do. Sure, they cured him, but only after years of being tortured and experimented on. Wade thinks his parents didn't know at the beginning, but after the first few months, he started to question if they knew what this place was. His parents had never been kind people, and Wade quickly decided his parents probably didn't care what happened when they signed that waver. He survives, though. He gets his mutation, and eventually, the X-Men manages to find the facility that has been doing this. He's glad all of the other kids have been saved and most of them reunited with their parents- he had looked after half of them in that hell hole so he feels responsible for making sure they are all save wherever they go- and he goes back to the school with the other kids who don't have a home to go back to or just don't want to go back home. It's weird to be a whole 17 years of age and not knowing how to function in the world. He knows how to survive, but that's about it. So, it's a struggle to settle into the mansion at first, but he quickly takes on the role of bigger brother to the younger kids. And yeah, he finds it hard to interact with the people his own age, too terrified to deal with the possible riddicule of how he looks.

Logan's been there awhile. He was found by the Professor after a few news articles popped up about some 'strange deaths' and he had investigated. No one at the school knows much about him- they know he lived in the woods for a year when he was 13, and that the Professor found him- but that's about it. Practically all the students avoid him like the plague in the halls and at meal times. It's not that Logan tries to talk to the others anyway, and he doesn't really want too. He's used to being a lone wolf. He keeps to himself, doesn't want to deal with others shit, and he plans to keep it that way. He's gonna leave this place as soon as he is 18 next year. He isn't even sure where he would go, but he refuses to join the X-Men. He can't bring himself too- to many accidents with the claws and panic attacks to be able to help people.

Naturally, Wade decides that Logan is the person he is going to befriend. Even if the idea of being judged terrifies him, he can't help but be interested in the quiet brooding bad boy.

[wannabanauthor]

Tim Minear, here's a hint for you:

For BuckTommy, you don't even have to get them back together as a couple immediately.

You can bring Tommy back to give Buck some closure, and Buck can suggest they just be friends because he misses Tommy's company.

So they still hang out with each other and Eddie, and Buck finally feels ready to start dating again. He doesn't mention it to Tommy, but maybe one day someone lets something slip about Buck going on a great date with this amazing guy, and Tommy overhears it.

Since he broke up with Buck, he knows he can't really question Buck about it, but it still irks him for the very obvious reason that he's still in love with Buck but doesn't think it's fair to ask for a second chance after breaking Buck's heart.

But the slight twist is that Buck is genuine friends with the new guy he's dating, and they like to sleep together on occasion, but it's not an actual romantic relationship. Neither one of them are looking for something serious, but they enjoy each other's company. However, that's their own private business, so Buck hasn't told anyone else the details of his situation. He just allows everyone to believe he's dating.

He knows Tommy will find out eventually, but he doesn't want to tell him or bring it up because it'd be awkward.

Tommy is noticeably irritated and a little curt with Buck on the inside, but he maintains his mask perfectly so that Buck never catches on.

Until one night, they're about to leave for a movie, but Buck's "friend" calls and Buck has to cancel his plans with Tommy.

Tommy leaves, very upset and irritated, but he doesn't even make it to his car before he turns around goes back up to Buck's loft. He knows that nothing is official with Buck's friend, so he knocks on the door, and Buck answers it.

Tommy kisses him hard and closes the door behind him. Buck is in shock, much like the first time Tommy kissed Buck.

Tommy then just lets it all out. He tells Buck that he loves him and misses him, and he hates himself for ending things the way they did and for breaking both of their hearts. He says he thought he could handle Buck dating again, but he can't. He's still in love with him and wants him back. He's willing to do anything: seek counseling, starting over, even moving in with Buck on a trial run basis.

Buck starts crying and releases all the emotions/thoughts he's had/felt since Tommy broke up with him. He's angry, rightfully so, that Tommy hurt him and that it took seeing another man in Buck's life for Tommy to make a move. He asks why Tommy waited until now to really say anything. He talks extensively of all the ways Tommy hurt him when they broke up.

Then his final questions for Tommy are "Why now? Why are you willing to make an effort now and not months ago? Do you actually see a future with me? Or are you scared of being alone if I move on?"

Tommy confesses that he's always wanted a future with Buck, but he's scared of getting hurt again. But he acknowledges that Buck is not at fault for the way past partners have treated him, and he should have stayed and talked things over with Buck instead of ending things and walking away.

Buck kisses Tommy and says he misses him and loves him too. Tommy wipes away Buck's tears and kisses him again and again.

After a few smooches, Buck pulls back and clarifies that he's still angry and hurt over the breakup, but he wants to work through it. Tommy promises not to run away like that again, or at the very least tell Buck when he needs space to think something over before making a decision.

Then they work on their relationship until enough time has passed for them to be happily ever after.

Tim Minear, this storyline alone could last you a couple seasons since Tommy is a guest recurring character.

I'm throwing you a lifeline here, so take it and make something with it. Do what white men are known for and steal this idea and make it yours. Come on, you can do it. Prove to folks that you're not just a mediocre white man who skated by on privilege instead of talent.

Because the queer people of color in this fandom are doing a better job of explaining your mess than you are.

That is all.

[god-o-bees]

Denial

Nikto X Reader Angst

Zombie AU

Nikto's little малыш has been sick for three months now. He's been trying to nurse you back to health, but you've been in such a bad mood, you won't even talk to him. You only grunt and growl. His alters have been taking over more often as well- he's been getting worse at maintaining control.

"We're just... getting them food." He can hear the lying tone in the other's voice, but he can't find the lie. You have been fed, after all...

He lets go, retreating into his own head.

"He can't keep doing this. He has to face up to it at some point."

"He'll destroy us."

"Doesn't matter- just kill it already."

He doesn't understand what they're talking about. Everything they say these days is so cryptic. It's too exhausting to try and understand... better just to let them be.

At night, he goes into the basement where you have been staying. Your skin is cold, but when he tried to bring in a space heater, the voices screamed at him not to. Something about rot... but he couldn't find anything rotting. In the end, he let them have their way.

He holds your in his arms, resting comfortable in the pile of blankets and pillows he formed as a little nest. He wasn't very comfortable with all the things you're being forced to wear. The muzzle, the chains, the bandages... this must be so hard you, but apparently it's necessary.

"Shhh... don't cry, my love. You'll get better soon, I promise."

Masterlist

[selestial-skies]

I'm taking a little bit of a break from art. I've had a bit of a rough week. I'm dealing with the stress of attempting to get a better job that actually pays me well and is something that I actually want to do and I just recieved news last night that a close family member is nearing the end of their life. I'm thinking that I'm going to try to come back at the beginning of December (depending on how long they hold on and if i am able to make it to the funeral since im concerned about traveling alone) but I will still try to post November's palette at the end of month but I can't make any promises beyond that.

I'm not leaving forever or anything I just don't have the energy to do the work involved with maintaining a online presence right now. I want to thank everyone who has shown support for me and my art, it means a lot to me and you guys are one of the reasons I had the confidence to apply for the new job.

Thank you so much for everything!!!

[herb3lla]

HAIRCARE tips 🎀

How I changed my hair from having greasy, damaged and "your hair stinks" to having a healthy, hydrated, soft, voluminous hair and getting compliments EVERY DAY

(Like I'm not even exaggerating guys, I really do get compliments on my hair everyday 👀)

Tip#1

Do what works for you

Literally don't listen to someone when they say "Don't wash your hair everyday" "wash your hair everyday" etc honey PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE try it out first!! Self care is all about trial and error it's never going to be linear and I promise you you'll have yourself figured out.

When I used to listen to my mom saying "don't wash your hair everyday it damages your hair" I literally used to wash my hair like 2 times per week and trust me IT DIDNT HELP ME AT ALL.

I switched to washing my hair every other day and my hair has never been any shinier and smoother plus it's getting what it needs!! Washing your hair depends On YOU. Please do whatever works for you

Tip#2

Oil your hair atleast 2 times per week

please I can't stress this enough. Your hair NEEDS food too and oil does that job for your hair.

You can use castor oil, coconut oil, olive oil, almond oil, jojoba oil or best if it's Moroccan oil.

You can mix these up together and use it on your scalp every two times per week and trust me guys your hair is never going to be the same. Feed your hair!!

Tip#3

Regulate blood flow

stimulating blood flow to your scalp will not only give you healthy hair but also ensure hair growth.

(don't be surprised if you start seeing baby hair all of a sudden because I am not lying 👀)

You can use a scalp massager or a derma roller. Derma rollers create tiny incisions to your hair which regulates blood flow delivering the nutrients your hair needs.

If you're using a scalp massager then make sure to lie upside down on your bed and massage your scalp gently for 5-10 minutes every day for BEST results. but it works fine either way.

Tip#4

Rosemary serum

This is my favorite!! And yes honey you can make it at home.

Get two to three rosemary leaves and put it to a boil with water on medium heat ( quantity depends on your container and this serum can be stored for two weeks at max ❤️)

When it comes to a boil strain the water and leave it to cool down then apply it on your scalp and massage it in with a scalp massager.

I used it every night before bed and tell my why my hair grew so much under just 7 months when I had the worst hair growth??? And it made my hair smooth and healthy and Soo ughh!!! I can't even put it into words just know I STARTED GETTING MASSIVE COMPLIMENTS AROUND ME OKAY?

Tip#5

Never leave your hair open while sleeping

Please don't make this mistake. I used to do this and it didn't do me right. It makes your hair extremely frizzy and causes breakage.

Put your hair up on a bun or do a little braid on your hair every single time before sleeping. Not even a ponytail!! A BRAID OR A BUN!! PERIODT! anything that does not leave your hair out.

Tip#6

Use as minimum heat as possible

Don't overwhelm your hair with heat guys. If you think there's alternative that's gonna give you the hairstyle you want without using any heat then use that. Like

Air dry your hair

Use hair rollers (there's tips on TikTok and YouTube to how you can get heatless curls using these)

Tip#7

Trim your ends regularly

Trim your ends every 3 months. It removes split ends reshapes your hair so you're good to go for your next hairstyle.

Also if you have extremely damaged hair and you don't wanna shave your hair off to "start new and fresh" with your hair I recommend trimming your hair ends every three months. I know it's a long and lengthy process ( but so is growing new hair after shaving your hair right?😭)

That way when you get your new and ✨ healthy ✨ hair after getting into hair care, the damaged old hair gottaa have to go ( slowly but surely❤️)

Tip#8

Use hair masks weekly

Hair masks are your best friend. It hydrates and nourishes your hair and best part it defines your natural hair out

My personal favourite is the fenugreek hair mask with banana and egg (I make it at home). Using it weekly to see the most results >>

You can try any hair masks that works for you ❤️

Bonus tip : BE PATIENT WITH YOUR SELF!!

don't overwhelm your hair by overdoing it. Be patient with your hair and care for it just like a you're caring for a newborn baby and it's gonna return all that love back to you ❤️

[chaithetics]

(3) Also, Logan knows that she’s pregnant and in that scene where they’re all together and start to give names to who’ll be sacrificed, someone mentions her and Logan immediately shuts them off “oh, that’s nice, throw the baby who’s pregnant and was never involved in the company as the sacrificial lamb!” but in a colorful, Logan Roy vocabulary. You’re a gem and I adore you!

Porcelain and the Shark: The Sleeping Lamb

Pairing: Stewy Hosseini x Porce (f) Roy Reader Word count: 3.1K Prompt: Combined with above and L to the OG's other prompt "Ken and Logan see Stewy at the end of S2. Porce is sleeping and he dismisses them, he's fuming as neither ask how she is." Warnings: Established relationship, children, anxious reader, reader is sick but pregnancy isn't confirmed, cursing, canon Succession family dynamics and angst. Roys being Roys! Some fluff. No descriptions of reader - you can imagine her as adopted, affair baby, different mother etc. A/N: We're so back... Happy Succession Sunday! L to the OG anon I hope you're still here! I'm so sorry how late this is, I promise the L to the OG request will be dropping shortly 👀 I can't believe this is the first Porce and the Shark fic of the year! I'll drop more I promise! I hope everyone enjoys this! Comments and reblogs are appreciated 🫶

The warm sun was meant to help, all the fresh air out of the concrete jungle gym should be doing more for you but you were laying in bed at the glamorous hotel with the doors wide open and a large glass filled with water and electrolytes. You’d felt ill for a couple of days now. Migraine, nausea - all of it. 

Jonathan was next to you colouring in and singing some song from the children’s film he’d watched last night and Tillie was fortunately napping. You’d hated feeling faint but it’s how you felt so you curled up more and watched Jonathan, your eyelids starting to feel heavy. 

“Here, honey.” Stewy says as he walks over with a cold compress and gently places it on your forehead. 

“Thanks.” You whisper and squeeze his warm hand. 

Stewy leans down and kisses your cheek, despite feeling ill your lips quirk up with a smile at the feeling of his facial hair brushing against your skin. It’s a guaranteed, natural response now. 

Anxiety normally simmered throughout your body and fogged up your mind but feeling nauseous and had clouded over that for once. It also helped that you’d changed your anxiety medication a few months ago and that seemed to be helping but being away from your family as they were on some overpriced boat that some pod of orcas had their eye on helped. But you still couldn’t help but worry about Roman, that stress definitely wasn’t helping the nausea flipping around in your stomach.  

Under other circumstances you’d cross firing lines to text him and make a joke about the orca pod watching them, he’d have found that that funny. If you’d sent it in the cursed Roy sibling group chat, Kendall would take the joke too far and Shiv’s white woman neoliberalism would be offended at being lumped in with those rich people. She was different of course. 

Connor had called her when they knew Roman was safe and was coming with them, something you were deeply grateful for. You’d texted Roman, the youngest of your older brothers, and just been met with a thumbs up emoji and then two minutes later a middle finger emoji. 

“Heard anything from Romey?” Stewy asks as he sits down on the bed next to you, he caresses your arm gently, the touch of his fingers so soft against your skin. He still makes your cheeks heat up and skin tingle. 

“No.” You whisper as you shake your head slightly against the pillow. “Just the emojis.” You sigh and as your head shifts so does the compress, Stewy gently fixes it and just nods. He looks out the window. 

He leans back slightly, laying on the bed. Stewy tilts his head back to watch you and smiles. He rubs your leg gently as he watches you. 

“Draw a chicken, mommy, please!” Jonathan says after a moment holding the paper out for you and a red pencil. 

You smile at him and Stewy smiles and scoffs. “Come on, mommy’s not feeling so great, can I draw a chickie for you?” Stewy asks, looking at Jonathan, the little boy, a younger mirror to his own face. 

Jonathan giggles and shakes his head, his dark curls bouncing as his small face screws up in cheeky delight. 

“No! Mommy’s chickens are better!” Jonathan says and giggles, and blows a raspberry at his father. Stewy chuckles and blows a raspberry back and then looks at you. 

“You don’t need to draw, love.” Stewy says gently as you take the piece of paper. 

“It’s fine…” You say smiling at Stewy and then giving your biggest smile to Jonathan who raises his shoulders up and smiles back. 

You chuckle and quickly sketch a chicken and some other animals for Jonathan to colour in, it’s been one of his newest hobbies. Requesting you and Stewy to draw things for him to then replicate and sketch in. 

“Thanks, mommy.” Jonathan says as he presses his face near yours as he watches you draw, his eyes widening in excitement as you finish up his chicken. He loves it and as he’s made clear, you’re more artistically inclined than Stewy. 

Jonathan starts to colour in the chicken, his tongue is stuck out as he does his best to stay in the lines. It’s a cute sight to see. Stewy watches too, he chuckles and ruffles Jonathan’s curls as he then looks at his phone. 

It’s a text that Kendall and Logan want a meeting, his eyes scan over each word, gaging how fucked Kendall is. Your tired eyes flick over to Stewy, noticing how quiet he’s gotten. “Everything okay?” You whisper softly, reaching your hand out to Stewy’s, he fully accepts the gesture and you intertwine your fingers together. 

“Yeah, uh, Ken and your dad. They’re apparently coming out, want to meet.” He says, looking away from his screen to your face, giving you a small smile. 

“Oh? Oh…” You answer. He rubs his thumb over your hand and you give him a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes as you take that in. It seemed like a red flag, a major red flag being waved off of a boat. You weren’t sure what to make of it all. 

“Don’t worry, I can tell them to leave. To not even bother, babe.” Stewy says, giving you a reassuring smile, he loves you, he can notice any sign of anxiety coming out and he can see your brow starting to slightly furrow. 

“No-no- it’s… it’s fine. Just, peace yeah? Olive branches, all that stuff… And, see how Ken is?” You ask softly, blinking frantically as your mind travels all over the things to worry about and think about. 

“You sure? You’ll be okay?” “Yeah, we’ll just nap, sleep. All the fun stuff for bonding.” You smile. 

The proxy battle had been an adjustment, one that had made the already tense and unstable Roy dynamics a million times more complex.  

Stewy blinks for a second and then nods. “Yeah, yeah sure.” He leans over and kisses your lips softly, he doesn’t care if this nausea is from some bug you’re going to pass to him. If so, he hopes it somehow reaches Kendall and your father. “You’ll be good?” He asks and you nod. 

It was a beautiful day, sunny and warm and this was not how Stewy wanted to be spending it. 

“Thanks for meeting man.” Kendall puts a hand out as if everything is water under the bridge. 

“Please. Please, please, please.” Stewy immediately goes into the hospitable host mode he was raised to be second nature. “Come, come, come. How are you, Sir?” He puts his hand out for his cold father-in-law. “Please take a seat.” 

“You guys need anything?”

“Yeah, don’t wait for us or anything.” Stewy laughs and Kendall laughs for a brief moment too. 

“I waited, but I was really hungry, so I ate with my family. Precious, precious moments.” Stewy tilts his head, giving them a smile that feels smug but never reaches his eyes. His brown pupils that you adore burn with proud frustration. 

His words are pointed. All three of them are fathers but the words don’t really register for Kendall who is just looking for a lifeline but they ring loud in old Logan’s ears. And they piss him off. 

“You guys good? You need anything?” He says as he blinks and shifts back into a generous host for the Roys and toes the fine line between this shit show. 

“Uh maybe in a minute.” Kendall says. 

Logan doesn’t say anything and looks unhappy to be there. Kendall gives his father a look and jumps right into business. “Well uh look,” Kendall flicks his hand, Stewy flicks his tongue, his face focusing on Kendall and the good humour gone. It’s serious now, nobody thought this would be a friendly visit after all. It never is with the Roys. 

“We both know it’s a- it’s a knife edge. You may have it, we may have it. Our proxy advisors tell us we probably have it.” 

“Mm-hm.” Stewy hums as he nods and picks his wine glass up. Neither Ken or Logan have reached for their glasses. 

“And, um…” Kendall looks at his father and smacks his lips, Logan’s completely unresponsive, acting oblivious to the whole thing. “Dad?”

“You look a little sweaty, dude.” The subtle indicators of a smirk slowly start to form as Stewy says it to Kendall. He wipes it as he turns to face Logan and sips from his wine glass. 

“Okay. Okay. So I’ve come to make a deal. This isn’t a negotiation. It’s a one-bang final-deal offer and it’s generous. So don’t insult me with a counter.” Stewy listens to Logan speak with an almost blank expression on his face while he places the glass down and picks up a piece of lavender from the arrangement on the table and lifts it to his nose. 

Jonathan had been doing that earlier, it had been pretty cute when Jonathan noticed the smell and then he had to wave them around and press it to everyone’s nose. Stewy doesn’t let the joy of that memory come through, but it’s so much nicer to think about than this. “I say this, we eat some octopi, we shake hands. Okay?” 

“Okay, I love that. I really do.” Stewy says as he puts the lavender stem down and drops it in front of his plate and pushes it forward a tad, he has no intention of sharing a meal with Logan and Kendall. Why do such a thing when the past exists? 

“Three board seats, including Ken’s.” Stewy shares a very loud knowing look with Ken who is silent. “You get a codified say in the appointment of our next CEO. We remove our poison Bill, conduct a strategic review on terms co-set with you, dismiss all our litigation on the proxy battle. Spin off cruises, okay?” Stewy’s looking less impressed now, even less so than how he felt when the message for this conversation made it into his inbox. He pauses and looks over his shoulder as if thinking, as if he was ever going to say anything different. “No, I don’t think that works.” 

“The fuck do you mean?” Kendall immediately blurts out. 

“Bullshit. Are you fucking stupid?” Logan takes his sunglasses off and looks pissed. “You have to consider that. You have to ask Sandy. That is a good fucking deal.” 

“It does not work for us, Sir.” He uses sir to still be respectful, even with this vile monster of a man. But he enunciates and pauses between each word to let them all sink in like rocks being thrown into water. 

“Dude, I mean, are-are you fucking for real? I mean you-you need to fucking make it work. Okay? Or I will personally fucking destroy you. I will come to you at night-” “Ken, it does not work.” He enunciates each word again to really hit Kendall in the face with it. 

“With a fucking razor blade and I will cut your fucking dick off.” “Fucking dick off.” Stewy says at the same time to finish Kendall’s sentence. 

“And I will feed it-” “And then push it up your cunt until poo poo pops out of my nose hole” Stewy shakes his head a little to give it a dramatic flourish. “Dude it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t mean anything. You can threaten to stuff a million severed dicks into my ball bag but the actual fact is we’re persuading more and more shareholders every day that we offer them just a slightly better chance for them to make a little bit more money on their fucking dollar. And that’s all that this is.” 

Logan’s silent with his elbows at the table, staring at his son-in-law. Stewy’s fuming internally but he doesn’t let it show, he’s not impulsive like the Roy children but it’s rude. It’s terrible manners to have your elbows on the table like that and Stewy can’t help but imagine a younger you getting scolded for something like that. 

He chews on the inside of his cheek and he can’t help but add it. They haven’t once asked about you, the daughter, the sister. Nothing, no concern, not even fake bullshit niceties. It’s an offence that they can’t even pretend to care for a second. Especially when he knows for a fact that Connor would’ve made some comment about you feeling ill, the nausea, the terrible headache and vomiting. 

Even if you weren’t ill, they still should’ve asked. It’s the bare minimum. Stewy’s eyes flick down to the table for a second and he picks the lavender stem back up. It smells peaceful, the opposite of this. He’s sure that when you go back home you and Jonathan will want to have lavender planted on the balcony and holiday home. 

“Really sweet of you both to come out and you know check on your family.” Stewy says as he twirls the lavender in his hand almost absentmindedly. He thinks about picking it apart, biting it. “She’s - your sister and your daughter - she’s doing just great. Nauseous and fatigued beyond your imagination, which I’m sure you’re both worried about. But Jonathan and Tillie are well, thank you for asking.” He stops twirling the lavender and tilts his head, he looks at Kendall for a moment, what a shadow of a man. “The Roys really know how to mix business and pleasure, right?” 

It was a stupid suggestion. Something unsurprising from cousin Greg but still mind boggling, he’d really outdone himself this time. When all the Roys and evil henchmen had sat around the cursed table of fate, Greg had panicked more than usual when Roman had suggested adding ‘Greg sprinkles’ to the Waystar Royco ™ guillotine. 

Greg had fumbled over his words and messily brought you up as a suggestion to be the sacrificial lamb. He weakly argued that you were a traitor for being Stewy’s wife and that was motive enough. None of it was plausible and before Greg could even string a full, coherent sentence together it had already brought a hyena laugh out of Roman, Kendall had just looked down and shook his head. 

“Fucking great! Hats off to that, have you seen her? Throw my own weakling daughter off - who’s probably fucking pregnant again - the only one who has actually given me some fucking grandchildren!” He spits out with venom. 

It’s a pointed shot at all of them, not a single Roy is truly in Logan’s good books. Tom stays silent but side eyes Shiv but she keeps her composure. She will not let them reduce her to a mother, it’s a pigeon hole she’ll avoid at all costs to keep the seat she’s only just clawed out for herself at the table. Kendall looks down because the blow hits him the most. Roman stops laughing and watches his siblings. 

“But oh willy-nilly-” Logan waves his hands, mocking them all. “Lets throw her, my fragile fucking blood that’s never been involved with the company as the sacrificial lamb on the rock. I’m not some fucking Abraham.” Logan’s eyes are wide and brimming with anger, he smashes his fist onto the table and glares at them all. All of the Roy children are looking down like they’ve been scolded, even though it was Greg. 

“Porce did have an internship in the publishing press during college, didn’t she?” Frank asks, thinking he’s somewhat more untouchable than Roy blood. 

“Gerri,” Logan’s tone is icy. “How does Frank look? What’s the angle there?” 

“How did it go?” You ask Stewy, sitting up and sipping some more water, starting to feel more and more human as the day went on but still nauseous. 

“Yeah, super! It was great, got to hear a lot of bad words from uncle Ken we can’t let his little ears hear.” Stewy says as he playfully puts his hands over Jonathan’s ears. You sigh and playfully roll your eyes. 

Jonathan giggles and squirms to move away from his father’s hands but Stewy just chuckles and starts to tickle Jonathan. 

It isn’t long after this that your phone starts to vibrate with notifications. Shiv has texted you asking what the fuck is going on, that Ken and your father won’t tell her what happened after visiting Stewy and she only found out from Roman that they saw Stewy. She’s scared about Tom. Then there’s a call from Connor. You answer him before thinking about replying to Shiv. You don’t want to be petty but your peace is worth protecting, it’s the first text from her in 6 weeks. 

Connor relays the sacrificial lamb conversation back to you. You’re kind of surprised that your father defended you but you’re not surprised that it was nasty and took shots at your siblings. Especially when the subject of Kendall’s fertility and children is a tense and sensitive one that’s weaponised often and feels heavy even in the subtle moments. 

Jonathan’s napping when this happens, you have the phone on speaker. Stewy’s listening quietly, gently rubbing your thigh as he concentrates. It’s easier to hear as Connor is whispering, he isn’t even sure if he’s really meant to be talking about this with you but it can’t wait for next Tuesday’s brunch and he’s also giving you whiplash by occasionally interjecting with his anxieties over Willa’s Broadway debut. 

You tell him it can’t be that bad and that you and Stewy will see it when you’re back in New York. You try to reassure him and after a while you rub your forehead and hang up. You turn to look at Stewy and sigh. 

He scrolls through his phone and then looks at you with raised eyebrows, a bemused expression. 

“It can’t be that bad, Willa’s not terrible.” You say, tilting your head and snuggling into his side. Stewy raises his eyebrows at you and smirks. 

“Wanna bet that for a smooch?” He teases and smiles more, his eyes are clearly saying it’s terrible. 

“No… It can’t be…” You quickly take his phone to go through the review and you swear you’ve just gone through most of the phases of grief and several other emotions reading that. You look up at Stewy and then chuckle. “Shit…” 

“Yeah…” He says and then lifts your arm up to his lips. Stewy starts to kiss from the tip of your index finger to your hand and then along your wrist and up your arm. You smile, feeling your cheeks heat up as he presses tender kisses up your arm. 

“I’m just cashing in on that little bet as much as I can.” He teases.

Lovingly tagging people who have interacted in the past (if you want to be removed lmk :)) : @ateliefloresdaprimavera @nadja-antipaxos @thegildedblogger @peachhiz @coocoolahh

@inknopewetrust @mittos @616wilsons @jolie989 @biblichorr

@foreverasleep717 @punisherinthealps

[hvrtbroken]

defne isn't exactly sure how they get separated , other than people move with a haste that is all too familiar . danger alarms in her brain . she tries to squint through the darkness , to look over and reach for thomas , out of familiarity , but she's carried away by people bustling past . her hand is still outstretched , from where it had been resting on him when she'd heard the boom . she thinks she hears her name , from his mouth . but there's so many other voices calling out , saying MOVE , that it's hard to tell if she just imagined it . defne tries to push back against the sea of people , but it's impossible . she feels carried away , her heart thumping harder and harder . people are shoving unceremoniously . she can make out a few figures falling over , letting out cries as they're almost trampled . NO —

defne bends down , her hand reaching out to help DIANA up , one of the older ladies at elysium . " you're okay . " she breathes out , eyes still whizzing over and around , trying to find thomas . it seems the world is in her favour , because there's a small parting in the crowd , with her half knelt down with diana . she sees thomas then , and a part of her feels relieved . but then she sees the gun in his hand and a stronger part of defne wants to cry out NO . he can't go out there . the gun looks wrong , when it's usually a bandaid or a stethoscope . she swallows thickly , keeps an arm up to make sure people don't trample on both of them as she helps diana stand up . she tries not to keep looking at thomas , but she can't help it . she feels her heart squeeze . there is a very real knowledge that if thomas goes out there he may not return . DEFNE'S EYES BURN , but she knows this is the cruelty of this world . there is no safety . there is no promised tomorrow . there is no living forever . she may not ever see him again . it feels cruel . " let's get you somewhere safe. " she whispers to diana , and helps pull the pair away , following the masses . away from thomas .

DEFNE DOESN'T KNOW WHERE SHE'S GOING . she can see people peeling off in every direction , but her hand stays wrapped in diana's . she can hear meredith yelling out orders with derek . there's more booms , yells . she strains her ears for thomas , but can't see or hear him again . she has to erase it - him - from her mind . she knows this . defne helps carefully walk with diana into the old library . as soon as they break in , a few people immediately point their guns . defne holds up her hands , indicating she's FRIEND not foe . " what's happening ? " she breathes out , confusion imminent on her face.

" raid . " one of the guys often with derek by the gates answers with a stoic look . it makes defne's heart rate accelerate further . THEY'RE NOT SAFE HERE . it's a chilling feeling . elysium has been home for months . it feels wrong for it to be anything BUT safe . " you help the doctor , right ? thomas ? " a voice calls out from the back of the library . defne blinks , adjusting the shoulder of her dress , which feels even MORE ludicrous now . she can see a woman kneeling by a man . " i think he has a concussion . he fell on the ground really hard. can you help ? can you check ? " the woman asks , pleading . DEFNE'S MOUTH OPENS . words die in her throat . she wants to say no . no . she's nothing like thomas . she can't even do half of what he does . she has no idea how to . ANOTHER BOOM ECHOES , shaking the walls of the library , and defne moves over with haste . " let me . . let me see . " she breathes out shakily .

" we need help here too . she's bleeding . " another voice calls out . defne squeezes her eyes closed . she knows now , more than ever , that she needs thomas . here . now . with her . not just FOR her , but for everyone else . she's never done this without him before . she has no idea what she's doing . DEFNE IS OUT OF HER DEPTH . hopeless . unbuoyed .

BOOM. the sound echoes in his mind and for a moment he's confused because... it just can't be real, right? there's no way, they are SAFE here in elysium. he knows that to be true. there's a beat of silence, everyone frozen in place before they start pushing past him, trying to take a look and figure out what's going on. " i don't know... it sounded like a-... " he tries to reply to defne as he takes a few steps away from her to see what it is, but then a second sound follows, closer this time. whoever got to the window first, he doesn't know who it is, can't see. but it's a feminine voice. ' there's people outside, they blew the gate. ' they quickly say and thomas PALES for a moment. of course; with all the danger the apocalypse brings, and being in their safe haven. they had forgotten that OTHER PEOPLE are as much of a menace as everything else. ' they seem to have weapons... ' it's right then that the panic starts, people crowd around him and despite his size he can't seem to push past with everyone scrambling to get to safety. he tries to remain calm but he can't see defne anymore. " defne! " he calls out, there's a little tremble in his voice but he's trying his BEST to keep composed. he can feel some people looking at him. no doubt trying to gauge his reaction to see how they should react and he can't allow himself to let them panic too. meredith manages to grab his wrist and pulls him out of his trance. " remember we've planned for this. go out there with the rest of the guards. intimidate them, they're probably trying to take over this place, we can't let that happen. " brilliant meredith always had a plan, he feels grateful for her foresight but still he looks around trying to find defne again, he thinks he sees her getting out of the room; but he can't be sure and he DOESN'T have the time to go check. meredith seems to read his mind. " i'll make sure she and everyone else is safe, just go. " he presses his lips together in a thin line and nods, walking to the other side of the group and into a different room where the people in charge of security are gathered. ethan hands him a gun and it feels so foreign in his hands that he frowns. ' only in case you need it ' the other man says and he hopes he won't have to. he doesn't think he'd be able to use it anyways. thomas is NOT a fighter and he's sure everyone here knows it... but the others don't. he's big and muscular, and that's somehow intimidating. as he follows behind the rest, he sincerely wishes that's enough. specially since the ONLY PERSON on his mind is no longer in the same space as he is.

[funnylittlelad]

it's insane how much i've been writing recently. i'm slowly clawing my way back.

[god-syndicate-if]

Hello everyone! While ignoring something I wrote all day today and I'm proud to announce that the first draft of the prologue is officially done! I'm going to send it to the beta readers, do a solid amount of edits, and then I should be able to post it!

[yujeong]

Time was at a standstill. Vegas was holding his breath without noticing, and continued to hold it when he did - he was afraid of what would happen if he exhaled loudly enough to draw attention to himself. His gaze was shifting between Pete and the man who was standing before them in the doorway, blocking their entrance. Vegas had never seen him before, but even so, he recognized Pete in him enough to know who he was. A dangerous aura surrounded him. There was an edge to his presence that Vegas would only come across people of certain circles. He was a fighter. A muay khao. Pete's father. Shame coursed through Vegas' body, smearing his skin, settling in his lungs, rendering him speechless. I thought he was dead, he wanted to tell Pete if he could. He wanted to scream at him, I thought you killed him. Pete was the one who broke the stillness. As if awakened by something, he took a half-step back and made a motion with his arms, almost raising them to his chest, but not quite. In an instant, Pete reverted into the pet Vegas had been keeping at the safehouse, bound by handcuffs and afraid of his belt hitting flesh and drawing blood. A lump formed in Vegas' throat. "Have you stopped practicing? Your form is off." The uncanny similarities between Pete and his father appearance-wise didn't mean a thing when it came to their voices. Vegas shivered. Was this what Pete would sound like in a few decades? (Were these the condescending words he'd choose to spew? Was Pete going to embody his father? Was Vegas embodying his?) "What are you doing here?" Pete whispered. "They let me out for a few days, so I came here to collect some money. Imagine my surprise when I found out my offspring left the job someone found him worthy enough of doing to... do what exactly? Yaai didn't want to tell me." He crossed his arms, waiting for an answer. Vegas didn't know what he was allowed to say. If he was allowed to say anything at all. "It's none of your business." "I'd say it very much is my business, as well as yaai's business who was dependent on the money you were making being some rich asshole's human shield." A choked sound scratched Vegas' throat. He didn't like getting reminded of Pete being the main family's bodyguard, even though he stopped being one mere months ago. Especially like this. That was the first time Pete's father stopped looking at his son and turned his head to look at Vegas. For a moment, there seemed to be recognition in his eyes. Did he know who Vegas was? Did he care? A snort came out of his mouth. He leaned on the door. "Oh, I see how it is." He laughed, scratched his neck. "I never expected you to whore yourself out for money. Tell me, is it preferable to the path I carved out for you?" Vegas could sense the disgust in his voice. He could also see it on Pete's face. He was too astonished to share it, but not enough to be unable to speak. "Khun, there has been some misunderstanding-" "Don't bother. I can recognize a faggot when I see one." Pete's movements were too fast for Vegas to stop him. A direct jab to the nose; his father fell like a pack of cards, groaning like a wounded animal. Surprisingly, no blood - Pete held back. Vegas didn't know what to think about that. "That was a pathetic attack, even for you." "Get up." "We're not in the ring, son." Pete growled. Vegas could see his hands trembling as he was keeping them in the air, maintaining an offensive stance. "That never stopped you before." "You were too young to understand what I was doing back then. What I was preparing you for." Pete was silent. "The world isn't kind. It'll fuck you over one way or another." He got up, spat on the ground. "You still haven't learned a thing. You're too old to afford being naive." He turned around, and without sparing a look at Pete again, said: "Now get the fuck out of my house." (For @musictooth, whose posts about Pete's father have reignited my passion for this specific concept and for @wretchedamaranth, whose comments on my writing are always lovely and precious ❤️)

[kira-light0]

Trying really hard to simplify my art style because attempting realism was destroying my motivation

[icewindandboringhorror]

I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently

[tabbytabbytabby]

Please please please tell me you're going to be writing more Bucktommy over the hiatus?! Love your work! ❤

Hi anon! Thank you so much! 💜 I definitely plan to keep writing them. I have a few things in my docs for them, but I'm always open to prompts if anyone has any 😊