#can't joke about anything anymore
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March 1958.
The Supreme Court v. Jack Benny
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When in doubt, Soup it out.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#lan wangji#a-yuan.#wei wuxian#Yes I am skipping over LWJ's panic at WWX joking about giving birth to A-Yuan. It's funny bit but there are many more to come!#The last time these two sat down together the tensions were so high. The peace is nothing more than a layer of cold fat on the surface.#It's not 'really' them coming to see eye to eye. It's them not having the energy to say what they really want anymore.#LWJ is very defined by his jealousy and the conflict it creates with his need to put his feelings aside for the perceived greater good.#To live a life where you are always second and never ever allowing yourself to be first...#If other people can be at peace and happy - it has to be worth it right?#If he orders a plate of food that he will struggle to eat but is the favourite thing of the person sitting across from him#Is it not worth the sacrifice?#But remember! You can't take anything for yourself ever. No matter how much you want it.#He did it once before and he regrets it so much. So all he can do is accommodate.#And WWX? Well. You can't let anyone in if there isn't enough water to splash around in.#Keep things shallow and they just move on. Even if you'll miss them when they go - this is just how things are now.#No more teasing and trying to pull a reaction from LWJ anymore. You'll never be more than someone he can't stand so what's the point.
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i think one of my biggest pet peeves is when you're trying to explain or delve deeper into a topic that's *a bit* more complex or challenging with someone and they immediately cut you off and resort to making jokes about their head hurting or dumbing it down to a cartoonish level for,,, comedic effect i guess
#like damn are you really not going to entertain me just a little bit?#you're not even willing to let me explain it#and it's not always difficult topics it's like people are not curious about anything anymore :(#dont we all have an inherent thrist for knowledge? i honestly can't think of anything more rewarding than learning#(as long as the speaker is not condescending arrogant in his approach)#and i also think it's a disservice to the person joking about them being dense or not understanding#it's an unpleasant situation overall because if they claim they're dumb that makes you the pretentious one#which of course you did not want ahh idk i just wish we could focus more on a topic and less on our personhood if that makes sense#del later 100% sorry i got upset(
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Have you seen AL's latest insta story? sure, it would even be cute... if she didn't set a trend of subtly (not so subtly) commenting on his looks.
also idk if you hadn't seen this one from November 16th:
(yes it looks like his handwriting) random thoughts:
"I think he likes me" tee-hee? Much need for validation?
gurl, going without a phone for a week? seriously? how? why?
... How did you even post, if you're phoneless? or did you wait to have one, to stage this pic?
maybe it's me, but sharing such an intimate note seems *just a bit* in bad taste.
Am I being too petty? Maybe. Whatever.
(Finally getting around to answering more Asks, so thank you all for being so patient!) @artificial-indulgence No, I don't think you are being petty at all. I'm really very tired of Anna's posts as of late, and all of the above is certainly no exception.
I think it's worth noting that she posted that picture with Bernard (and all of the pictures from her Insta story) in a separate post, because apparently she didn't get enough attention, and the picture of Michael and David was dead last in the post. Which seems fitting, given that the caption on the post was a "A weekend of vanity and insanity" and the first few pictures were of her, suggesting that she was using the picture of Michael and David to get more traction for her own pictures.
This ties into your comment, @longingtolinger-blog, because she did indeed post that story calling herself a "vain twat" just earlier in the same day as the story with the pic of Michael and David:
And I had the same thought, that it seemed as if she was trying to be self-deprecating, but it just...didn't land? It came across as awkward, mostly because vanity/being vain isn't really something to brag about. Do we all have moments of being vain? Of course. But Anna seems to be making it part of her personality, and it's just...not cute. Also, in the same way as Michael calling David his lover, you generally don't refer to yourself as a "vain twat" if you don't want people to think that you're a vain twat.
That said, I did see AL's Insta story from the 16th, and nearly three weeks later, it still doesn't make sense. As you said, how did she post this without a phone? Or, as we could infer, does this mean she got that note sometime earlier in the week, and waited at least several days just to stage this picture? Also, with two little kids around, how does it make sense for her to not even have a backup phone? We could certainly assume that she did, but the story above would suggest otherwise, since Michael had to email her (which is, for the record, about the least romantic correspondence imaginable). Let's also remember that on the 16th, Michael was still in the middle of being virulently attacked on Twitter after the events of October 30th, and Anna had plenty of opportunities to defend him. To say something like, "Michael's a great guy, he does a lot of charity work, he doesn't deserve to be attacked like this." Instead, it was all about her and what she gets from him. In fact, the week prior to the 16th, she posted another Insta story of flowers that he supposedly sent her, with that song "My Love Mine All Mine" in the story, thereby doubling down on bragging about him getting her things while saying nothing about him as an actual person.
Going back to the first story above, we know that Michael has previously been affectionately compared to the Tennants' dog Bernard (and David to their other dog, Myrtle). But as you said, given AL's history of making snarky comments about Michael's appearance, it feels a lot less affectionate and a lot more unkind coming from her. What surprised me about her Insta story the most, however, was how not surprising it was, as that story is actually not the first time Anna has "joked" about leaving Michael. And given that that seems to be an enjoyed pastime of hers, it almost seems like they would both be happier and better off if she actually did leave him.
It somehow becomes worse when we see this exchange, which took place on Twitter yesterday:
(Maybe she should get a refund, since she seems pretty unsatisfied with what she's got...)
Again, I would have no problem saying that this was just teasing or ribbing or whatever if it weren't for literally everything else in this post, plus what I've also talked about on my blog previously. But complaining about Michael like this publicly makes her come across as so damn rude and ungrateful. Contrast this with David "complaining" about Michael and it only makes the difference even more stark: That with David, there's a mutual respect and affection and reciprocation, which we do not at all ever see Michael do with her. And I can't help but think that if their relationship is as great as she would like everyone to believe, she wouldn't be on Twitter going back and forth with fans just to get that validation, as you mentioned.
Those are pretty much my thoughts on AL's posts/stories from the last month. It's interesting to me that more people seem to be noticing the weirdness of all this, and I appreciate both of you writing in. And as always, glad to hear from my followers about what you all think...
#artificial-indulgence#longingtolinger-blog#reply post#michael sheen#welsh seduction machine#i can't#how many times does AL need to 'joke' about leaving Michael before it isn't a joke anymore#i'm genuinely curious#but what's the old saying: when someone shows you who they are believe them the first time#the more i think about it the weirder this all seems#again if this was a one time thing i wouldn't even say anything#but i will leave it to my followers to make up their own minds#anna lundberg#relationships#thoughts#discourse
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The Wrong Side of the Portal Raph from cabin 10 was wondering if you have enough water before you do anything fun!
"Raph wanted to swim with his family and maybe some new friends if you want to, but it's important to have enough water first. I have some extra water bottles if you need them!"
@tmnt-fandom-family-reunion
"Oh, cool!" Smokey gratefully accepted the water. It must have been refrigerated or had ice in it, because it felt cool in his hands. He smiled up at Wrong Side of the Portal Raph happily. "Thank you!"
Now for the...other part. Smokey nervously rolled the water bottle between his hands, but kept smiling. "And thank you for the offer, but I can't swim and don't really care for the ocean." And that was before he had a fire spirit take up residence in him. And before his cabin magically flooded. In the past, water had been okay, even when he couldn't swim, because he'd had his brothers with him. It'd been enough to quell his nerves. Plus, he had a big inner tube to hang out on!
Ever since Sparky had moved in, he'd gotten a lot less comfortable with it, even with his bros around. It'd taken his nerves and turned them into an outright aversion. Smokey did not like deep water or being submerged. He could handle shallows, but they were, well...shallow. No one could truly swim in them. He still had his inner tube, but floating around his with his bros had become a lot less relaxing and a lot more anxiety inducing.
The solution his family had found was letting him ride with one of them - normally Raph. It still made the box turtle nervous and Sparky hissed in his head like a cat being threatened with a bath, but being with someone he trusted wholeheartedly helped. It helped a lot too that if he was on Raph, he wasn't touching the water and had - in his mind, anyway - less of a chance of falling off. (He still clung to his brother like an octopus though.)
"Thanks though!"
#sparky = a fire spirit who dislikes water on principle. a giant cat.#mikey = never learned how to swim. scared of what could go wrong but trusted his bros enough to not worry about it.#sparky + mikey = fear is amplified into an anxiety and develops an outright aversion to any body of water deeper than his stomach#he honestly doesn't like the lazy river anymore but his bros tried so hard to find a way to make him comfortable#he doesn't have he heart to tell them#(the first time he rode the lazy river after sparky took him as a host he CLUNG to his inner tube like a scared cat)#(stiff as a board. staunchly refusing to look at the water. stared straight up the whole time. could NOT relax. nearly had an anxiety attac#sparky feels bad about it but they can't do anything about it. it's in their nature. they do NOT like water and they can't hide it#the bond gives away everything#the hissing thing was said as a joke but Mikey legit can feel how much Sparky does NOT like the water and it amplifies his own anxiety#now if sparky wasn't a fire spirit - he was just some random other spirit that didn't like water - it wouldn't effect mikey nearly as much#but hosting a FIRE spirit? causes changes#this is one of them#sparky au#cabin 15: fire nation#cabin 10#tmnt fandom family reunion#sports event
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good morning and merry christmas !! aesthetic photo of my cookies be upon ye
#just me hi#i put them on the plate and then the little devil and my shoulder said Hey what if we spent the next 20+ minutes editing it#and they were right that was fun lmfvshgh#Except for looking for a glitter brush on ibis! why are all the thumbnails so blurry it hurts my eyes Ghfksfjvk#yea the phone is working out good :) i'm gonna be taking pictures of everything now ehehehgh#also forgot to eat these for the 20+ minutes i was playing w/ the pictures#my breakfastttt: (went to go count but i have eaten some now. ouh) ✋10 🤚 christmas cookies :3#they're little ones- oh hey these pretzel one are kinda salty! yaaay#i like the swirly/horseshoe ones the most though. nyum#/we have pozole my mom made last night but i think that has to be warmed up hfhsvh#we got back from christmas midnight mass and everyone- Everyone (crazy) went to bed as soon as we got home lmfhvshg#i don't think that's ever happened. usually a couple are still awake until dawn and Then they go to sleep lol#yea but we didn't even get to try to the pozole last night <//3 helped to strain it last night though :D it smelled kinda sweet+spicy so ou#//we're waiting til i think friday or saturday for presents this year because of the Events so noo wrapping cleaning today 🎉💥 kfsvh#and i've been asked what i wanted. see i don't have that trouble of suddenly not having a want in the world: i just kinda don't have that#already for some reason lmao ?? so yea default state. do you think i'll get socks kfshvfh#//do love having to go back into my tags and add the topic slash bc every topic is related All the time Forever lmfsh#//hey but i DO need socks HEY i'm not joking anymore. don't want any with patterns though they will bother me lol#cuz unless i like the patterns i am not going to wear them :/ that is unless i think they're silly then they pass#are they holiday-themed? i'll prolly still wear them during the fourth of july so we can guarantee 1 whole day of use lhfshvjg#however during the warmer days (anything above 55 degrees) i wear chanclas w/o socks. so maybe not so much guaranteed#and also if i can't find it's match i will just never wear it again. truly tragic#i'm painstakingly matching my plain white socks i can Not handle patterned socks again#/wait was this post about cookies. dude how did we get here Lmfjvskfhvahfhvj#//Okay i'm gonna ummm#Ummmmmmmm#uuuuhm. draw :3 Toodles !! merry christmas !! <3
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The City of Vancouver versus Lenny Bruce.
#Lenny Bruce#vancouver#british columbia#history of canadian comedy#censorship#can't joke about anything anymore
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my brain gets overwhelmed by everything very easily lately so hopefully me grabbing posts from your blogs and keeping them in my drafts and suddenly rbing all of them and disappearing for hours or days doesn't scare you all
#sseriously this is so annoying i see one silly post and my brain explodes#and goes 'this is so triggering and scary we should delete all our social media and dissociate for hours'#and the post is like. just a harmless joke or smth#i talked to my therapist abt it and its most likely like. my brain has too many things to worry about#and it can't handle like. literally anything anymore#sso. yeah#[ 💚 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐬 ]
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I genuinely do not want to see people anymore if anyone asks me to hang out in the next five weeks I will just say no I need to isolate a little it's the healthy kind I want to sit alone in my room and do alone in my room things I can not listen to these people speak anymore I am bored of them I am so bored of them they always talk about the similar things and I don't care about their things I don't like living in acute reality I want to go back to my little cocoon world. Which I will do now. The only acceptable way to communicate with me now is via Tumblr you people are good eggs you I respect these other guys that presumably exist I'm annoyed with extremely annoyed with.
#sex is such a big topic in their group and I am genuinely SO tired of it I don't want to hear about it anymore don't you have any other#idk. personality traits that don't revolve around sex or trauma or queerness or whatever#what happened to interests? what happened to just having an interesting conversation thats not filled with sex jokes or stupid comments?#they're all beneath me they're alllll beneath me I am just better than them now idk i don't need to associate excessively with lowlifes#that can't talk about anything but the same five topics honestly it's so boring.
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UGH Why do so many songs I want to sing require a huge amount of charisma to pull off.
#creepy? good. pathetic? good. awkward? good. murder? excellent.#confidence? magnetism? FUCK no.#I promised I'd sing a Gay Song if the anime lesbians won and it's looking like they actually might#and everything I can find that's in my vocal range (i.e. NOT TOO LOW) is a duet or is about 'women love me I'm an icon'#slash 'I'll steal your girl' which TO BE CLEAR I am in favor of these songs existing I think we need even more of them actually#but there is no way in HELL I could ever make something like that work it would be THEEEEE biggest joke in the universe#so there's nothing for me to comfortably sing ;-;#unless you count 'lacy' as a gay song which I go back and forth on#I GUESS I could do rem's sacrifice song in the musical but that song is HARD I do not think ANYBODY wants to hear me sing that lmao#I USED to be able to fully belt 'you oughta know' (of which there IS a gay Broadway Version) and that was my one (1) pop/karaoke song.#but I can't do that anymore.#I might be able to build it back up again but that would take. a while. it's not something I could toss out within the week of the poll#ending (if they win)#ugh why did I stop singing every day I don't know how to do anything anymore a;lsfkja;slfjadslfk#unhinged lady screams about music
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yknow realizing my family was super fucking mean to me for no reason before i turned 18
#no cause. why did my parents threaten to beat me for having a low C almost D/ any missing assignments. but now whenever my mother finds out#about it she like. actually asks if i'm doing alright and not yelling at me to turn them in (she still wants me to do good but like. there'#no more threats?) i mean my bio dad might still do that but i don't tell him anything about my classes anymore#AND ALSO HOW I USED TO BE PICKED ON BY MY BIO DAD AND MY GRANDPARENTS WHEN IWAS YOUNGER FOR HAVING TEXTURE ISSUES BUT NOW THEY'RE LIKE#“oh yea i can't eat this food because i just don't like it” AND UNDERSTAND ME WHEN I SAY I CAN'T EAT CERTAIN THINGS.#i just GAHHHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK#i still remember when my mom and bio dad thought i was lying to them about losing my glasses when i was FUCKING 9-10. they thought i#hid/threw them out!!! and when i found them like a few years later because they were in a spot in my bag young me never really used#MY MOTHER STILL THOUGHT I PUT THEM THERE ON PURPOSE. THIS WAS YEARS AGO BUT I'M STILL MAD ABOUT IT#I HAVE BEEN TREATED LIKE A LIAR ABOUT THINGS FOR SO LONG TO THE POINT THAT I CAN'T HANDLE JOKES ABOUT LYING AND ALSO GET SCARED THAT#I'M NOT BEING TRUTHFUL EVEN IF I AM!!!#anyways :D#i'll probably delete this later idk i feel bad right now
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this is a very venty post don't mind me :D
that nintendo direct was so horrible.
it was literally like 80 percent remakes and remasters.
never in my life have i seen an announcement video exist just to say "every game you've ever known since the 90s is being remade/remastered, sorry, we ran out of originality".
literally like all the video game market is anymore is remakes and the movie industry is just as bad.
the nso releases are fine because they're not like, remakes taking up full game slots. they're old games that are being made accessible and that's great... but there's no need to remake this many games when they can do that. remakes used to be rare. remember stuff like the wii u shop and stuff? with all the games they had on those things? now it's a tiny selection and everything else is a remake :/
also I feel like a lot of new rpgs are just like... lowkey fe knockoffs now instead of original rpgs.
i'm happy for like... two existing remakes, but one of them is mario rpg which people wanted waaaaAAAAAYYYY before the remake and remaster era, and the other is baten kaitos which im not actually happy about remaster-wise (the updated ui is trash, they took out very specific charms of the original ui), just happy that it will get more recognition/notice from people since it was never popular.
they also completely removed the english voice acting which like okay yeah it wasn't always that great but the voices fit perfectly and it wasn't as bad as fans meme on it for! it just sounded like they were talking through a tube and that was actually the worst part of it lol.
someone suggested to me that they may have just lost the data for it, but idk. i wish they'd just admit that somehow if it was the case, because it bugs me that the english audio is just completely gone when ultimately i really liked it. i wanted the game to be accessible to newer players, sure, but i also wanted the english audio there. ig that's because i grew up with it and i liked it, but it's still such a bummer for me!
paper mario being put on the nso and tyd getting a whole remaster does make me sad tho bc it feels like they're leaving the original in the dust when it was so good. if you're gonna do tyd, at least do them both.
good for innersloth though, i'm sure they never imagined being on a nintendo direct. they're the real winners here.
#DCB Comments#the FE fandom is just as bad too. every single solitary direct that comes up they're like#OMG FE4 REMAKE. like ??? I used to be just annoyed but#now I'm just feeling the “shut the actual fuck up” mood bc it's ALL they care about for FE anymore#nobody wants new FE games. they're just obsessed with the idea of remakes#it's more annoying bc it's all the majority of the FE fandom talks abt anymore#also does anyone even know if games on the NSO ever get a remake or if originals of remakes go onto NSO?#wondering bc I don't think I've seen a game on NSO get a remake or vice versa#like I was always wondering if Mario RPG would be on the NSO but it never was and now it has a remake coming#since FE4 6 and 7 are on the NSO I can't see why they would be if remakes were coming#also if they're in the process of making a new console do y'all still think they'll release Gamecube on the NSO?#idk if they'd release PoR on it since they'd prob remaster that one (I don't want a remake for it but remaster might be nice if they#update the map graphics and stuff) since it would net them way more money to release the game as a standalone but if they#did put it on NSO I'd really love that. I get up I play PoR. I lay down I PoR. I go in the car I play PoR (I don't drive lol)#but anyway yeah I'm just tired of every single Direct having FE fans being annoying as fuck#also ppl were apparently legit like omg the new banner coming means fe4 remake will be on the direct#oh my goooooddddd stfu at this point I just don't want it remade bc i am 💅 p e t t y 💅 bc ppl are so annoying abt this#when a leak for a new game came out (engage) from a very reputable source ppl knocked it and called it ''obviously fake''#(the joke is now not just ON them but IS them) but then when they got a ''leak'' abt an fe4 remake they ate it up#like wow lol. wow. they won't believe anything unless you say fe4 remake then suddenly they believe anything you say abt that alone#it's rly sad that my favorite game has become a cesspool of annoying fe fans#the thing is fe doesn't come out with a whole lot of remakes. it never has#it's just that when gaiden got a remake ppl have NOT shut the fuck up ever since#and I've seen ppl saying every game under the sun should be remade#frankly if they remake anything right now it should be poor fucking shadow dragon (yes. the remake.)#anyway most of y'all know how annoyed i get abt this lol like yeah maybe someday fe4 could get remade but#it's the fact that the modern day fans are SO fucking annoying about it now. back ten or so years ago fe4 fans were just happy TO play it#we were just happy to have it at all even in emulated form and it being an snes game#we loved it as it was and didn't bitch about it bc it wasn't uwu modern enough (and i've played casual mode since new mystery)#now ppl are just like oh i like it but i don't want to play it unless it's remade
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so
#i despise vivziepop as a creator but i hatewatched hazbin as a distraction yday on some pirate site#been questioning for a few months abt being greyace and like#had a very traumatic experience yesterday#alastor being an asexual character is such a stupid comfort for me suddenly.#after everything happening#i dont want love anymore just put me in a qpp pleaseeee#sophie.txt#very mixed feelings that i can't put into words but everything kind of lined up#idk kind of cool to see an ace character that doesn't fit the washed out fluffy boy narrative. just a thought#even if his asexuality is just thrown around with jokes and prideflags#i think i've always loved the idea of sex but never the real thing#im very sex positive and there's kink i would love to participate in and adore in visuals and practice and theory (leather latex)#but im really not built for anything beyond non-sexual intimacy#my constant battle of am i just against penetration or am i greyace or have i not met the right person yet#i think abt myself in a selfship context and love it but i think about myself in a real scenario and i just curl.#i wish men knew how to court and ask consent instead of jumping but im glad i didnt get s/ad at the least christ#i wish men were real they used to go to war#okay i did get s/ad i worded that wrong. im grateful i wasnt r8pd but idk if tumblr will nuke me for saying that
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you know school season's coming back when i have random concertos playing in my head
#hi forsyth. please don't be a nightmare this semester 🙏🏼 you are epic. i am on my way to being epic. let's be friends about it!!!#bluebird.txt#violaposting#i'm the chillest ive ever been lowkey and i highly suspect (though i can't be sure)#that it's the birth control affecting my hormones somehow#the doctor said there's nothing wrong with me. he is a doctor. i am not. however. it feels like perhaps there could be something wrong with#me.#whatever it is so far the birth control is actually helping though#i've gotten my period twice! on schedule! it's never done that before! like fucking ever! in my whole life!#and again i'm chiller. i definitely still have anxiety no doubt#and there's also the fact that i just took a fat fucking relaxing lazy ass break#which was quite awesome tbh#so that might also be why i'm feeling good#but i truly wonder#cuz not a lots been happening so this semester we'll see how i go emotionally speaking#and there's also the fact that im a musician and an artist and therefore inherently a little fucked up#and it's not an easy road by any means even if i wasn't#but like. am i just wishful thinking or could the birth control actually be helping me be calmer somewhat?#hey computer am i depressed hey computer could taking birth control somehow make me not depressed#just kidding. there's never been anything wrong with me i am just silly and funny and not like other girls!#nevermind that i have one and a half friends who wont stop calling me autistic 😭#i dont think im autistic but i genuinely have no idea anymore how to respond when my friends joke/talk like that#like. shrugs. i'm not autistic i just believe your beliefs my friends <3 im an ally <3
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something something about how it really sucks that it's basically impossible for me to not be discriminated against being in so many minority groups and minorities within that, but also I feel like I can't get angry/stressed by it because I am infinitely more well-off compared to other people, but also I experience a lot of things first-hand and shouldn't have to deal with that ( as should no-one else ) but also actually it shouldn't even matter because you're allowed to feel angry about stuff and be mentally ill and not have to justify and fuck.
#i have friends and family who make comments about topics which directly effect me and don't even consider it#who make insensitive jokes and don't notice#and I just feel like I can't say anything because who am i to get angry#especially because a lot of the time they don't mean it but still#I am forgotten about or considered a controversial topic within my own minority groups#and there's just so much more I want to rant about but I can't#god I'm just tired#I don't want to deal with anything anymore#i wish there was someone else I could talk to who would get it#but I also just doubt I'll ever meet anyone who is like me in this way#and it's not even an individualist I'm so different kinda thing#I am literally just so different#I've never met ( aside from family ) someone of my exact ethnicity
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dni.
#i don't know how people who do not have siblings live cause#whenever i feel the very intense and real urge to genuinely kms their faces pop up in my head#my sister laughing at my jokes after she had a bad day and saying with tears in her eyes that hey you know what i need you so much please#call me constantly when im abroad i don't know what I'd do without you#and my little brother not trusting my parents advice when he is sick because he thinks they're constantly telling him to do a hundred thing#anyway but listening to me when im giving the exact same advice asking me such innocent questions that seem so obvious#but he doesn't know because of his childlike innocence#like why are we not going to the doctor if i have fever how do our parents know how to cure it and how can i take dolo without a doctors#prescription and me laughing and explaining that it's okay it's normal it's paracetamol you don't have to worry you'll be okay in day or 2#or how he's excitedly telling me that these are the colleges i looked up are they good how do you know if they're good#he needs me so much even tho he'd never say it they've been even worse parents to him than to me he doesn't have anyone else#so then how could i be so selfish and hurt the two people who love and need me the most the two people on whom if i see tears#it feels like a stab directly to the heart?#but i can't help it. can't help fantasizing about dying#maybe myself but even better if by some terminal illness#i keep thinking me lying in a hospital bed and doctors saying there's a complicated procedure and it's very expensive and results aren't#even guaranteed so are you sure want to be treated#and me saying no please let me die my parents would protest at first they would feel it is their duty responsibility to keep me alive#but id say please i don't have anything to live for and i just CAN'T i can't do this i can't live this life it's too difficult im not#capable im already failing please just let me give up and then they'd agree#and then i would tell my father that im sorry i couldn't pay you back for all the money you spent on me my education my living expenses#but atleast now i won't ask for anymore money from you ever you'll probably get some money from the insurance policies#and i would tell my mom that sorry for being such a burden on you all these years but now you can finally be free with the 2 kids you#actually love and you never have to cook for me again or fold my clothes or feel bad that i won't attend your family functions#and i would tell my siblings that i know it's sad but please i know you guys are strong and bright and you're gonna be very happy and#successful and that's enough for me im sorry we couldn't have our dream raksha bandhan away from our parents but you can carry on without#me and ill always love you. and that would be it.#i know it's wrong to fantasize so much about dying and ive read somewhere that they may just seem like thoughts now but if left untreated#one day you're gonna have a bad day and you're gonna find the perfect opportunity and you were so sure you were never going to do it but#then you do. but i don't know how to stop
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