#can't get you out of his head
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along the same lines as priest ari...👀
i want therapist andy and i want him darkkk
#therapist andy#i want him obsessive and stalker-ish and possessive with a big 'ol corruption kink#big voyeurism guy#biiiiiiiig cnc guy#absolutely obsessed with you#can't get you out of his head#follows you everywhere#molds you into this perfect little pet for him#is an awful therapist obviously lol#cuts you off from your friends and your family until he's the only one you have left in your life to turn to#you become dependent on him because he's so fucking wildly dependent on you#literally puts a tracker on your car or ON YOU somehow#😮💨 i'm telling you#dark af but i waaaaaant it
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this is basically what happened, right?
(these guys are very lucky that everyone at NRC 1) has the combined intelligence of a sack of bricks, and 2) is easily distracted by shiny things.)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#these two are SO sleazy and i am utterly delighted by them#can't wait to find out their tragic backstory in approximately 3-4 weeks!#fortunately i have like a month to figure out how the heck to draw their hair (spoiler: i will never figure it out)#also. god. i love it whenever leona accidentally reveals his Mom Side.#he doesn't care about any of this but he WILL be tagging along to make sure no one else gets into trouble#once again he has to be the Responsible Adult and he hates it. the whimsical hat weighs heavy upon his head.#anyway this is me so excuse me while i now talk about diasomnia for three hours#but lilia being all 'kids gotta have some adventure in their lives!' is hilarious#specifically because you know silver would NEVER.#100% silver not only never snuck out but he always went to bed on time AND brushed his teeth AND flossed even when nobody made him.#lilia: aww but you should be enjoying your youth! >:c#silver: i am. i enjoy being respectful and disciplined and honoring you as my father.#lilia:#lilia: maybe i'm TOO good at raising kids#you know i was going to say none of his kids would be involved in this but i actually think malleus definitely would#he would not see it as a moral quandry though. he would just be excited to be invited along.#(the only reason he isn't there is because he was busy admiring a termite-infested beam somewhere and yuu didn't get a chance to ask him)#i mean MAYBE if lilia as his single authority figure told him no then he would have some reservations#but lilia's the one who's screaming HELL YEAH LET'S SNEAK OUT AND DEFY AUTHORITY while dabbing so moot point there#sebek would never and he would rat on everyone else. unless malleus is going in which case he's already there.#and i guess if everyone else is going silver probably would too#but he'd. y'know. feel conflicted about it.
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Thinking about Robin and Sunday's halos.
About how Robin's halo isn't a closed circle, but more like a branch forming a circular shape, where the start and stem don't touch. It's also uneven in shape and splits into three flowers, like it's allowed to grow freely, unobstructed. Something about Robin having left Penacony and having escaped the confines of her cage, being able to flourish. About her being able to let people in, and connect to them.
Meanwhile Sunday stayed behind to be the head of the Oak family and conform to the strict role that's expected of him, and his halo is a perfectly symmetrical shape that's practically fully closed off. It's sharp, almost more like a crown of thorns than a halo. And it almost doesn't have any openings to let anything, or anyone, in easily. It actively discourages getting close to it.
And then if you want to get sappy about, which I will - Sunday doesn't let anyone in, with that almost completely sealed, thorny halo of his... But there's an opening in Robin's halo, and so it can fit around Sunday's. Something about him always being able to find solace in her, because there's room for him in her (halo) heart always, by design.
Anyway I'm not normal about them.
#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr robin#hsr sunday#there's also something to be said about the size and position of their respective halos#robin's is much smaller than sunday's#and it floats above her head a little tilted to the side#it looks more like a fancy accessory#sunday's is a lot bigger - it's almost bigger than his head#and it hangs behind him#always hovering in view like a frame#much more oppressive than robin's#those siblings... those siblings!#mihoyo!! you can't keep getting away with it!#when are you releasing sunday from npc jail#ray's records#thank you kura for prompting those thoughts with your art and then making me put them into words#and this one goes out to you mercy for your additions i am ALSO abnormal about#harmonycest#this was prompted by the ship and the ship was on my mind when i wrote it so i am tagging it but this works without the shipping goggles to#no matter how you see them robin is so so important to sunday#his safe haven even in the way their halos are shaped#mihoyooooooOOOOOOOOOOO
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one day you wake up and realise how happy gojo was in his death and it fucks with your head so bad. he was content to have died doing what he believed was right, which was believing in his students and their capabilities. he seemed glad that he could finally join suguru in afterlife. the fact that suguru wasn't there to pat him on the back on his way out to battle saddened him, satoru's greatest regret was being left behind by suguru and he wanted to catch up as soon as he could, so he was satisfied with the fact that he did the most he could and that his job here was finally done. he was happy to be able to help even after his death.
gojo wanted to foster strong and intelligent allies who would change the jujutsu society for better, that was all he wished for and he made that happen. gojo died knowing he achieved his life goal, he died knowing it was okay for him to not be there anymore, that he could finally rest without worrying.
what i am trying to say is gojo satoru was probably more happier in his death than he would have ever been alive.
#specially with his analogy of “you can appreciate a flower and help it bloom but you can never ask it to understand you”#this and the final flashbacks parallel so well i am surprised i overlooked it the first time#but that is more to say he deserved a better see off his death more acknowledgement i am so sorry i just can't get it out of my head#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk spoilers#gojo satoru#jjk 271#jjk manga#satosugu#stsg#geto suguru
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May your hardened heart be woken By the soft and distant song Of all you left here unspoken All the shards we keep stepping on - Take this body home Take this body home Call the wind, and let her know Take this life outgrown Take this broken soul Call the stars, call them all And take it high, take it far, take it home
#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu#sqq#lbh#scum villain#heard the song Take This Body Home by Rose Betts and it nearly took me out at the knees#it really really suits sqq's self-detonation in hua yue city right? i'm not the only one feeling this?#considered adding some literal shards for them to be stepping on - since sqq's sword explodes - but i couldn't quite make it work#anyway this has been playing like a music video in my head for the past couple days highly recommend listening to the song#if you haven't heard it before#can't get over the absolute dissonance between how sqq views this scene and how everyone else must feel about it#like to him he's just completing his plan - hopefully keeping lbh from destroying a city with energy imbalance and escaping The Plot#nbd! he and sqh have planned it all out it's FINE :) off he goes!#meanwhile everyone who loves him - including lbh who worked years to get back to him and is trying to work through a lot of grief#and resentment and doubt and longing and... - watches him DIE in FRONT OF THEM#just collapse while coughing up blood sword disintegrating energy completely consumed#like holy hell sqq could you traumatize the people around you any more???#no wonder lbh went a little bit crazy after that like my man was already not in a great place but what the fuck#lbh watches his shizun presumably sacrifice himself for him ONCE AGAIN like after he's finally Gotten Strong his shizun is STILL#coming to harm in an effort to make up for his shortcomings#my art#most of the time out here drawing what amounts to muppets and then sometimes i get the urge for this and just need to cover everyone in blo
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Had a sudden realization
They're both theater kids
#And they wonder why people ship dabihawks#Have you ever seen two characters who mirror each other more than these two? No you haven't#They are literally bowing in the same pose but Reversed I am crying#You can't see hawks' other foot but you can bet from the positioning of his leg that he's also doing the thing too#I fucking can't#Someone get these two assholes out of my head please and thank you#Bnha#Bnha spoilers#Dabihawks
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How's Dande's arm doing?
the curse is gone and he is as good as new! (well, not totally new, his burn scarring is still there)
#ask biji#dandelion treehollow#scarring#scars#Remove Curse got rid of the mummy rot#however he did feel the spell trying to remove another curse on him...#probably the geas spell that currently has him collared and having to behave#he can't be out of the party's sight without a psychic damage bomb going off in his head#this is what betraying the party will get you#contingencies...#sketch#dnd
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I could only got up to the sketching stage for this but they're so cute AHBFSUBFUYFIAFIUWFHSFU
sketch ? no color ?? no problem! 🎨🖌️✨
#for me#twisted wonderland#twst#sebek zigvolt#twst yuu#twst mc#fanart#fshdshdh DISSEMBLED FIRST YEAR#DO I TAG THEM FHSDHSDHSDHS#I WAS READY TO YELL HEAD FIRST BUT THEN I GOTTA PROPERLY TAG FIRST SO THEY CAN BE TRACKED#SCCCCCREMAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TODAY JUST CAN'T GET ANY BETTER#I WENT OUT WITH A FRIEND TO MEET A NEW FRIEND#CAME HOME TO SEBEK#AND HERE I AM NOT LOOKING AT THIS#AaaaAaa????? AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! INDEED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#I a m u r i c on right now#I SHa ll sle ep in that posi t ion literally toni ght#THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS??????????#SEBEK LOOKS PERFEECTT TO THE VERY NERVE ON HIS FOREHEAD FHSDHSHDSDH#ffshdshd CLOSES the first years' eyes#and GIVE them opened mouth each a cookie and CLOSE them#i was thinking of just publishing the ask as it is and yell at the tag#but then it requires me to write or put something to post#so somehow i decided to attempt on coloring ur sketch i hope u don't mind#TJANKS AGAIN!!!!! FOR THE DRAWING!! AND THE THOUGHT THAT THEY ARE CUTE!!!!#GETTING FANARTS iS HAPPINESS LVL 10. AFTER GETTING UR ART REBLOGGED WITH TAGS LVL 9!#YIPPIEE!!!!! ♡♡♡♡
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Why would you—That's not—I just wanted to ask for help, why did you have to go and make it awkward???
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#xue yang#Its such a relief to not have to draw so many characters once again.#Redrawing the specific font from the English translated mdzs books was surprisingly fun!#Maybe I'm alone in this...but I think characters switching to a different font of speech for *emphasis* is peak comedy#you can't communicate voice changes of sound very well in non audio forms so this is the best I can do.#Anyways...rip Xue Yang. You finally meet your idol and he brushes you off#Rather— he doesn't live up to the expectations you built in your head#Kind of an on going issue there Jester (I refuse to call him king or sir)#XY is constantly making people out to be the versions he needed them to be to feel justified in his actions#but struggles to pivot when confronted with the fact that these ppl are *more* than just one surface reading!#wwx doesn't actually think xy is flirting. He's just tired of all the fake fans + wants to get out of this convo.#button mashing the A button to skip the unskippable cutscene#Lan Wangji is in the next comic btw. I've missed him dearly. I'm sorry he's been gone so long </3#edit: poorly spelt MDZS strikes again. This is why I need more time to write my comics. So I can actually proofread B*(#edit2: I cast 'Power of Technology' and fixed my error. Everyone reblog this version instead please
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you'd think a timeloop of mouthwashing would go so hard but unfortunately i think to remain true to the source material. the crew member stuck in the time loop WOULD have to be jimmy
#opposite of a 'fix it' fic#'i didn't think it was possible for things to get worse but you keep proving me wrong' fic#mouthwashing#sorry i have a lot of thoughts about this#i think so much of curly's character is tied up in like. you knew something was wrong and you didn't act and now you can't.#like it's not a coincidence to me when the printout for the asteroid warning comes out. you had a heads up about the asteroid#you had a heads up about this man. and you didn't act and now you can't.#so I don't think a timeloop would work for him. it WOULD fix him but it would not fix his character. iykwim#anya and swansea would get too much done. all you need is one time where you have access to the scanner to get the gun#and you can just start killing jimmy. and they would. good for them#i would feel too bad to do that to daisuke. im not sure what he would learn other than exactly what swansea points out#abt learning and coming out worse#unfortunately mr bob the builder wannabe WOULD think he should be in a timeloop and it would match his character /neg
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Literally all I care about is their life in Brooklyn now.
#dumb doodles#mario movie#super mario#mario#luigi#new tv spot: check out this new bit of bowser being weirdly flirty!#me: oh wow; mario's leapfrogging pedestrians like a LUNATIC while his brother runs after him on the street like a normal person#luigi: mario; bro; please just be normal; we're going to get sued!!!#mario: psh; we're not going to get sued#*the bros then fall down a warp pipe and make mario right on a technicality*#can't get sued for head stomping if you get iskied to a new world where that behavior is somewhat encouraged
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Hob is going to come home one day two months into Dream's retirement (and seven weeks into their marriage) and Dream's going to be full Victorian maiden on the chaise lounge, arm covering his eyes.
Hob, who is not a fool: Want to talk about it, or want to be consumed by the agonies for a little while longer while I prepare dinner? You got groceries, right?
Dream: [horrible groaning dirge of assent]
Hob: I'm starting to get a little concerned, dearest
Dream: I went out to. Obtain groceries. And the woman at the till said 'enjoy your food'.
Hob: And you said?
Dream: "My thanks. you as well."
Hob: My poor love. Have a kiss to ease the sting.
Dream: [accepting the forehead kiss as his due] I can't go back to that grocery store in this lifetime.
Hob: Understandable.
Dream: Can we fake our deaths tomorrow?
Hob: Give me two weeks to wrap everything up, then we can.
Dream: <3
#dreamling#you can take the dream out of Dream but you can't take the dramatics#he's going to be horrified to realize that sometimes humans just replay their worst/embarrassing moments in their heads on loop at 3am#instead of sleeping#dream didn't suddenly gain social skills when he became an immortal human#he just lost the ability to will himself away in a cloud of sand#poor dream just wants humanity to be petting cats and fucking his husband#and instead it's Failing To Small Talk Correctly#and everybody everywhere immediately sensing he has No Chill Except On Rare Occasions#even getting drunk off his mind to forget that just results in hangovers the next day#but the bit where Hob is constantly demanding them to take lovey dovey selfies for his phone backgrounds is nice#and Hob will mention my husband in all conversations just because he's so pleased they're married#Hob. Marjorie knows we're married already. It is unnecessary to introduce me as your husband still.#Hob: idk she was looking like she'd forgotten that fact since last time
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People: find Lucanis attractive for multiple reasons
Fucking weirdos that need to take a break from the internet: YoU'rE fEtIsHiZiNg HiM bEcAuSe Of HiS aCcEnT!!!!
#lucanis dellamorte#fucking... no???#have you looked at him?#he's gorgeous#that scene where he's dealing with Spite having a tantrum?#that's hot#sure there's weirdos in every. single. fandom. that probably are.#but like#from what I've seen that is not the general consensus#and im not giving any more personal info out#but just a heads up#i am Not White#i am also part of a minority that gets fetishized heavily#loving his personality so far#love me an assassin#and a pretty one at that#whatever he's got going on with Spite?#I want in#I can't wait to meet the rest of his character#because im not just sexualizing him#im just enjoying the view until the doors open#anyways#fandom drama
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rereading the nuca pink doujin and seeing yakumo tear himself apart re: his snake form vs his human form all this agony and self-doubt and silent suffering and fear of rejection like "if i looked less human would u hate me" , "if u saw me in my true form wouldn't that be horrible. terrifying. disgusting" , "if i admitted i want to swallow you whole would you think worse of me"
and i imagine him asking something like this to the crowd of clan members , who are , undeniably,, a group of Kinky Fuckers
they all smile with the serenity and carefully masked excitement of a horny olivine. masterful beautiful reassuring expressions (errr..... masked to different degrees depending on the clan member)
#yaku is in his head so much about that#he thinks his snake form would be gross right? right????#eiden might give me Wet Hole privileges when i look like this carefully crafted human avatar#but if i revert to my original body there's no way anyone would ever want to ..be with me... like that? right???#meanwhile eiden's just got that sly look on his face in the corner waiting for yakumo to make the proposal#i can't imagine any of the clan members being particularly freaked out about yaku in snake form.....#all the yokai are immediately eliminated from Grossed Out pool. like. that's them. they know how it be#then you got the ppl who have lived way too long to be shocked by a sweet little snakewife being more noodley than usual#rei and quincy fall into that category most likely. blade by association because . well. blade.#he's gonna make a Yakuchan Snake sculpture and it's gonna be extra cute so yakumo doesn't feel shy about his snake form anymore#(actually it's going to freak yaku out even more and he's gonna spiral thinking that he's uglier than he ever imagined)#(and he's gonna run away feeling more insecurity while blade is SUPER CONFUSED because he captured his cuteness perfectly??)#(eiden's gonna have to reconcile another misunderstanding. sorry eiden. artistic differences are rough)#and you have the general Kinky Fuckers like eiden oli and morv#morv won't care as long as you feed him LOL#and eiden and oli are just sideeyeing excitedly like. snake? snake??? can we. can we try that 👀#i imagine that the only people who might express hesitation at first are edmond and dante#eddie would probably cave though once he realises it is IN FACT still yakumo in there. and he can fully consent#(then we give way to Kinky Fucker Edmond. Welcome to the party eddie!)#hmm... dante... never really thought about him and snakekumo...#how would that even go DOWN? like what is even the siTUATION here? how did we get here??#dante catches sooley who has a tiny snakekumo in his mouth??? a tiny lil guy who was lurking in his palace for some reason???#hm. warrants more thought exploration. we'll come back to that another time.#nu carnival yakumo
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@hereticcryptid I appear to be slowly but surely developing an entire series about how Hensheng and Baxia apparently get fed up with their owners' inability to express their feelings and take matters into their own hands...
#mdzs#jin guangyao#nie mingjue#jgy#nmj#nieyao#very sincerely this is a concept i keep coming back to and spinning around in my head#i find it unreasonably funny i want these swords revealing every tender feeling that these two are categorically incapable of admitting to#really i just want to bring the concept of e'ming and the general embarrassment hua cheng feels for his sabre at all times and throw it#into the mdzs world#can't quite bully the concept into an actual fic but i do love thinking about it and drawing art related to it#i assume nmj nearly went completely feral the first time hensheng shot out at him#like yup! he knew jgy was a snake! he's trying to attack him while his guard is down!!! well nmj is gonna deflect this fucking weak attack#and then SKEWER jgy and there's no way lxc can hold it against him!#except rather than deflecting hensheng baxia is a horrible traitor about it and instead he ends up getting cuddled by a touch-starved sword#0/10 nmj is having a horrible day he would genuinely have prefered jgy try to kill him (jgy would have ALSO prefered that as it happens)#(nhs on the other hand is having an AMAZING day when he sees it)#my art#THANK YOU EVERYONE THAT SENT ME PROMPTS!#this seriously helped get me through the day and made my evening so much better#i shall continue to go through them tomorrow after work as well 🥰🥰🥰#hensheng
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Some fic because I love your au, Fenton is gender brainrot, and little baby dan cracks me up. Full disclosure, my only familiarity with DC is DP crossover fanfic, and a Batman movie I fell asleep during. (If I had a better grasp on the characters I would totally write more :(( i love interactions) also sorry for the weird spacing. Idk why tumblr did that
~~~~~~~~
There was an empty cardboard box on the table of the Justice League’s main conference room. Taped on the top flap, next to a doodle of Fenton’s logo, was a jump drive.
Heaving a sigh, Batman plugged it in and pulled up his screen on the projector. The drive, which was named “little baby dan’s evil playtime”, contained two files; WATCH_ME_FIRST.mp4 and its-a-secreeeet.pdf. He clicked on the video file, and immediately the projector filled with a blurry close-up of Fenton’s goggles.
After a moment of fiddling with the camera, Fenton stepped back, giving a cheery wave. His lab coat and goggles were a pastel pink, which was new. “Heeeeya, Bats! Whoever else is there! If you’re watching this, you probably weren’t there when I dropped the box off, aaand it’s probably empty.”
He clapped his hands together gleefully. “And Connie, if you’re there, this is payback for cussing around my daughter.” Batman was instantly relieved that Constantine wasn’t on base. Hopefully the situation wouldn’t require Constantine’s expertise. (Or any of the Justice League Dark. Fenton seemed determined to drive them all to an early grave with his casual refusal to acknowledge the supernatural air around him.)
“Now, as you’re all heroes, I’m sure you’re all familiar with the whole,” Fenton paused for a moment, as if searching for the proper words. “”You ate a burger on a Tuesday or something equally inane, and it kickstarted a series of events that led to you going insane and evil and murdering 95% of the Earth’s population and now you must fight your evil alternate self, because your time-controlling cryptid Peepaw said so,” shtick, so I’ll skip the backstory. Say hi to Dan!” Fenton grabbed the camera, and Batman quickly jotted down several notes about the concerning number of things the boy had just said.
The camera swiveled around to show Nightingale, holding a strange beast in a manner that reminded Batman of an “elongated cat meme” Nightwing had shown him when he was still a Robin. The creature bared a maw full of razor sharp fangs at the camera. Nightingale adjusted her grip to hold the creature’s paw and make it wave, which evoked a deep growl.
“Haha, he’d kill me if I did that. Dan likes Nightingale much more than he likes me.”
“Because the worst she has ever done is attempt to shoot me.”
The camera had moved, so Batman couldn’t visually confirm that the deep voice had come from the creature, but the voice didn’t match any of Fenton’s previously revealed companions. “Yeah yeah, her aim sucked back then.” Fenton gave the camera a toothy grin that was only slightly less unnerving than the creature’s. “Dan’s not technically me, he’s much more like Dani, actually, but the world would probably end again if we left him with his other... What did you call him?” Fenton glanced offscreen.
“Bane of my accursed existence.”
Fenton chucked. “The other half responsible for his existence.” Batman added more notes to his file. “So, yeah, Clocky left him with us for a bit to help along his rehab. But a certain psychologist-in-training I know says that repressing rage isn’t healthy, and even without a lot of his powers, he can wipe out most of a city in- what, an hour? We tested it. It was around an hour.”
Everyone present shared a look of deep concern. As if able to see their reaction, Fenton quickly held up his hands in surrender. “Don’t worry! Clocky reset it. Approximately zero people have died from Dan in this timeline.”
“Yet.” Came a furious rumble from off-screen.
“Yes, you’re very scary.” They heard Nightingale coo.
Fenton laughed. “Yeah, we need him- and all of you, -out of our hair for a bit while we concoct more evil plans, and you’re all the least likely to die to him, so you get to babysit! Thanks!”
He reached to shut off the camera before pausing and turning away. “Foley! Which of the furries is the one who really likes animals?”
“Man, do you realize how that sounds out of context?” Foley laughed. “I think Tim said it’s the little one. Damian?”
Fenton nodded and turned back to the camera. “Don’t let Damian try to adopt Dan. Or anyone. Dan will bite their hands off. I mean it!” To emphasize his point, he removed one of his hands.
Batman sighed and added “ability to remove limbs” to a list of Fenton’s powers.
“I’ll include a list of “tasks”” Fenton’s disembodied hand made finger quotes, “we gave Dan to keep him occupied. There’s some at the bottom for you guys. They’re mostly just blatant abuse of his powers for the sake of fun and science. I’d appreciate it if you’d let him mark things off the list and add notes on how it goes. Or you can do it. Or I can steal your cameras. Your choice.”
He thought for a second. “I think you’re supposed to leave, like, pizza money or something, but I don’t think you can get pizza delivered to space. Anyway, thanks for letting me blab your ears off while Dan’s probably committing war crimes for twelve minutes. For your sake, I hope he inherited my interest in space. Good luck! Thanks for babysitting!”
Waving with his still detached hand, Fenton ended the video. Batman closed it and opened the PDF as the few other members present murmured amongst themselves. Most of the pages were filled with a curling script Batman didn’t recognize. The fourth page had a huge, bolded header, reading JP TASKS.
The door opened and shut in half a second as the Flash burst in. “Superman!” The speedster wailed. “I can’t get this thing off of me!”
The Flash waved his arm around, sending small droplets of blood flying as he tried to dislodge the creature sinking his teeth into the speedster’s arm. Batman raised an eyebrow beneath his cowl as Superman quickly lent his super strength in attempt to pry the creature’s jaw open. Dan didn’t budge.
Well, he could certainly see the family resemblance been Fenton, Dani, and Dan. Shaking his head, he turned back to the list.
Task 1: Find Dan. He’s probably attacking someone.
He highlighted the text and crossed it out. This was going to be a long shift.
[Anon, this is me crying over the wonderful gift you have given me. You bastard.]
---
"Do you think Fenton's regeneration powers extend to his..." Green Lantern frowned, trying to remember the word the kid had used but coming up blank. "I dunno. But do you think if we cut off little Dan here, he'll heal back up with no problem?" He gestured helplessly to the scene in front of him. Flash was still screeching about the beast on his arm, and now Superman and Wonder Woman were trying to pry him off. Batman was standing to the side, silently bemoaning the lack of quiet. He just wanted one peaceful shift. Just one. Please.
"I'd like to see you try, hero. And I'm not little." Dan spoke, startling all of them. His grip on Flash's arm tightened, making the speedster squeal before releasing the man and spitting out a mouthful of his blood. Batman noticed that his mouth didn't move despite the clearly spoken words. In fact, when Dan closed his mouth, it was like he didn't have one at all.
"So you do speak!" Superman marveled.
"Of course I do. I am not unintelligent, unlike you lot."
Despite his pain, Flash still made sounds of protest that everyone promptly ignored.
Superman flushed. "I just wasn't sure. It was hard to tell in the video."
"Ah, yes. The video that the Fenton menace sent you. Was there a note for me in the flash drive?"
"Uh, no." In one of his less finer moments, Green Lantern stuttered over his words and moved in front of Batman, obviously lying. Dan merely growled and flew through both men, heading straight for the giant monitor. Batman barely suppressed a shiver. Density shifting? Might as well add it to the list. He could see Martian Manhunter, who was in the back of the room, tilt his head at the display.
Dan ignored the room as he used his entire body to manipulate the computer mouse and scrolled back up to the top of the page. Staring intently at the scribbles no one could make out, the heroes could do nothing but shoot each other nervous and confused glances. More than a few of them jumped when Dan chuckled deeply. Honestly, his tiny body was at complete odds with his baritone voice.
"Maybe rehab will be fun if he's letting me do this." Dan sneered, flashing their reflections a sharp fang. No one wanted to ask what exactly he was in rehab for. The little beast turned his gaze to Batman. "You are the one called Batman, who rules the cursed city, correct?" The dark hero nodded, not trusting himself to say anything. "Excellent. You will be my chaperone for now, just as Fenton decreed it. Good luck, mortal man. Pray, I do not destroy your home a second time."
Without any time to unpack that conversation, Dan promptly disappeared from view. Some blinking text caught his attention, and Batman scrolled back down to the English text, glancing at the next few items on the list.
Task 2: Do not let Dan read his portion of this letter until you have a way to track him. There is no containing him.
Task 3: Keep him with a chaperone at all times. (If you can)
Task 4: Do not let Dan back into Gotham unless you're fine with a sudden decrease in the clown population.
Task 5: Take him for a walk in Death Valley. He likes hunting lizards.
Task 6: Make sure he goes down for his 2pm nap every day.
Task 7: He'll ask for it, but do not give him any burgers for mealtime. It upsets his stomach.
Task 8: Dan gets ONE(1) sweet after dinner before brushing his teeth. Those green pop rocks Batman always carries will do fine; he likes those. :)
A sudden alarm blared from his wristwatch, making Batman tear his eyes away from the screen, indicating an emergency at Arkham. This time, Batman actually sighed out loud. There was more to the list, but right now, he really needed to find their new charge before he killed the Joker, from the sound of it.
#pondhead replies#anon let me kiss you on the mouth (platonically)#danny phantom#little baby man danny#except he's dan#supervillain danny au#god i can't get the elongated cat meme image out of my head#you are a genius#if you didn't catch it gotham was the city he destroyed#what did fenton tell him to do you ask?#well dan is very good at hunting#causing chaos and bringing certain peoples to justice all over the world#like a reverse santa#he also gave dan permission to go buck wild on the joker if batman brought him to gotham#if batman didn't STOP his escape to gotham#that counts right?#long post#dpxdc
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