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bigskydreaming · 6 years ago

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Had a chance to watch Ant-Man and the Wasp finally, and I don’t have enough time to post my thoughts in full now, so making a note to come back to it later:

Scott Lang is Valid. All Scotts are Valid. Scott Lang, Scott Summers and Scott McCall should start a We Are Valid club.

Hank Pym and Hope van Dyne can both go jump in a fucking lake. Yeah I said Hope too, and I meant it. While nothing new, what this movie obliviously shows about how insidiously ingrained classism is, at the most fundamental levels of our society and entertainment, is....something.

Like, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with Hank and Hope’s passion to rescue Janet. What IS fucked up is how at every turn, their need to do so and restore their family is upheld as sacrosanct and justifying everything done in the name of that mission, while at the exact same time they have absolutely no regard for Scott’s desires to do the exact same thing with his family. Because they are the wealthy ones, the upper class, the patrons of the equipment Scott uses. He’s just their lackey, his heroism conditional on whether or not they even deign to grant him access to their toys, their mission of Family Over All must always be the priority, and when this conflicts with Scott’s own mission of Family Over All, this is either an obstacle or an annoyance in their eyes, or an outright betrayal at other points.

With the insidious part I was talking about being that the narrative supports their assertion that their needs are more important, the writers oblivious to the fact that their own unconscious biases in this regard (Upper Class equals Better or at least More Necessary) have them throwing their own titular hero under the bus in defense of this basic premise...a premise so basic they don’t even REALIZE their story is crafted to make this argument. (And srsly, another thing all these Scott protags have in common, lmao, like wtf is it with main characters named Scott who are treated as the villains of their own story for daring to stand up for their own needs and wants and not being willing to sacrifice everything they care about for the sake of people who would never sacrifice themselves or their wants for them??? Again...Scott McCall, Scott Summers, now Lang. Weeeeeird. Anyway).

But like, Hope literally abducts Scott in order to obtain his help rescuing Janet, waving off every objection he has as to how this could jeopardize his freedom and ability to y’know...RAISE HIS DAUGHTER, because her mission to save her mother, missing from her life for 20 years, is Valid, but his mission to NOT spend 20 years missing from his daughter’s life....she’s like, meh, can’t relate....okay wtfever. Everything Scott says about his concerns regarding potential consequences for his own life are dismissed as trivial and inconsequential. It’s covered and taken care of, he’s repeatedly assured, thanks to their arrangements that they put very little time and effort into crafting...and thus fall apart at like...the slightest provocation, like the very second anything with the rest of their plans starts to go wrong, it all unravels there. So like....his fears and worries are NOT trivial, the narrative even bears that out, it just also tries to at the same time defend their position of treating them as lesser than their own concerns.

Like Scott tells his trusted friend, the person HE values and has every faith in (faith that is born out by the fact that Luis only revealed their location via truth serum), where to find them so he can help Luis with their work plans they need to salvage their own careers and keep their business running, and Hank and Hope AND the narrative are like wtf dude, this is the worst thing you could ever do, and of course now the bad guys found us, what a bonehead move this was.

Even though, again, Hank and Hope literally drafted Scott against his will over his objections and gaining his full cooperation only after making promises to handle his concerns, promises that ARE NOT MET, because they are not infallible....but this doesn’t get acknowledged. Instead its emphasized that the guy who had the least agency here is the fuckup, for daring to prioritize his own needs and wants and job and livelihood and friends and coworkers and family over theirs, when they show zero actual empathy for any of his. Like, its textbook classism, Hank and Hope sniping at Scott all movie about how bad off they are because they’re on the run after what he did in Germany, their lives and careers are tarnished....but because Scott’s job isn’t as important as the things they do, its literally treated by them and the narrative itself as being irrelevant, not worth prioritizing. Scott’s ‘mistake’ in trusting a friend that under normal circumstances absolutely is trustworthy, is spotlighted, while their mistakes, relying on contingencies that aren’t actually able to support how much they rely on them, once things go south....are swept under the rug.

(And for the record, in regards to Scott’s going to Germany with their tech resulting in Hank and Hope’s reversal of fortunes....I mean, Hope basically says to Scott’s face her real issue is just that he didn’t ask her to go along. That its not even his actions or motivations they object to, so much as just his not asking their permission first. Using their tech under his own power, not as an extension of theirs. Even though elsewhere in the MCU, heroes are celebrated for following their consciences rather than upholding obligations they made to the persons responsible for empowering them in the first place - look at Steve defying the wills of those who gave him the Super Soldier serum, look at Dr. Strange defying the wills of his teachers who told him to keep his hands off the Time Gem, etc, etc. But the ex-con given size-shifting tech for the sole purposes of whatever the hell his ‘bosses’ tell him to do with it does the same, and the narrative’s like WHAT WERE YOU THINKING. And Hope’s final parting shot on the Germany matter again isn’t even that he was wrong....its that if she’d gone with him, he’d never have been caught. Like lol wooooow writers, way to obliviously lampshade your awareness that the rich will always have a get out of jail free card that the struggling single father literally does not).

And then back to what I was saying about how the writers throw their own hero under the bus for the sake of Hank and Hope’s wants (and yes I’m aware this is supposed to be Hope’s movie as much as Scott’s, but Scott was very clearly the protag of the movie this is a sequel to, so I’m not attempting to diminish Hope’s significance to the franchise, because again, none of this is me saying that Hope’s motivations aren’t valid, just that them always being elevated ABOVE Scott’s, her co-protag, is not)......like look at the convo Scott has with Cassie after they fake out Woo and Scott has what’s supposed to be his Come to Jesus revelation about his own actions. He literally tells his daughter that he’s a fuck up and he hurts people even when he tries to do the right thing, when like....source????

That framing only works if you, like the writers, take for granted Hank and Hope are in the right when they view Scott ‘ditching’ them/their mission in order to go make sure Woo doesn’t catch him out of the house and lock him up for twenty years as some great betrayal. IT’S NOT! It’s literally just him doing the EXACT same thing they do the entire movie! PUTTING HIS FAMILY FIRST. Every single time Scott talks about his status as an ex-con and his fears about being locked up, its NEVER about his own personal freedom or about all the things he wants to do that he can’t while on house arrest, etc. It’s always, ALWAYS centered around one thing and one thing only - making sure he’s able to be there for his daughter. This is his ENTIRE motivation through the entire film, the movie itself acknowledges it, and THEN it proceeds to INVALIDATE this by saying Scott prioritizing THIS over helping Hank and Hope rescue THEIR loved one is SELFISH.

A refusal to self-sacrifice for the sake of those unwilling to do the same IS. NOT. SELFISH. It’s just not! And the only way to make the argument it is, is by doing exactly what this movie does with its classism - take for granted that the lower class character is EXPECTED to sacrifice for his betters, while them doing the same in return would be deemed exceptional or proof of their selflessness, but it is certainly not something anyone should or would expect them to do.

But nah. The writers just do not even GET that they’ve elevated Hank and Hope over one of their own story’s protags to this degree, so they don’t think twice about making Scott’s prioritization of his family, his daughter, a FLAW he has to learn to overcome, IN A CONVO WITH THAT VERY SAME DAUGHTER, in order to be a true hero, and put others ahead of himself (and his daughter). As long as they’re like, richer or smarter than him, at least.

I mean.....lol.

And let’s not get into the fact that Janet literally engineered a way to HIJACK SCOTT’S ENTIRE BODY AND MIND when ‘necessary’, and the movie just...rolls with this. Hank and Hope don’t even feel a need to point this out to Scott when it happens and he has no idea what just happened. LOL. It’s so taken for granted that his role in all of this is to do or be whatever they want or need him to do or be, that like....the writers literally write his entire body being used without his knowledge or will...being something unremarkable. Not even worth noting. Unlike the incessant way any time Scott uses their tech without their express permission or for his own purposes, this is him having no respect for their genius in making it or their generosity in allowing him to use it.

Course, let’s also not get into the fact that body hijacking as a trope needs to diiiiiiiiiiiie omg, or at the very least NOT be treated as an opportunity for comedy and levity. It’s not. Stop it. Can we please kill it with fire? I know we’ve been doing this for decades, but it doesn’t change the fact that the idea of someone else literally using a character’s body for their own ends without that character having any agency in this whatsoever....like, that is an idea that certainly is worth exploring, has merit as a story....WHEN TREATED AS AN ACTUAL VIOLATION. NOT AS A JOKE. Oy. But I digress.

Moving on, since apparently I lied when I said I didn’t have time so I was just making a note to do this later, lol wow who could’ve predicted that WHOOPS ME....Ava and Bill Were Right.

Isn’t it interesting how Hollywood spends so little time and effort making white antagonists and villains sympathetic....because they know they don’t need to! Audiences will do the work for them! They’ll bend over backwards looking for ways to justify any and everything a villain does as long as they’re hot enough, or charming enough, or smart enough....as well as white enough.

No, Hollywood these days saves the effort of crafting sympathetic backstories and motivations for villains when those villains are marginalized characters. Because they’ve at least figured out that much. That there’s too much backlash in ALWAYS painting black characters like Ava and Bill as villains with no motivation other than greed or a desire for violence or whatever. They get that at least.

So when they make villains of color - and make no mistake, Ava and Bill were very much framed as the villains of this movie even if they were actually more just antagonists, with the technical villain being that white dude who is so irrelevant who even bothered LISTENING to his name? Like, the entire point of having Ava ramp up from her introduction as antagonistic but sympathetic to increasingly hostile to ‘our heroes’ to outright aggressive and violent at every turn (even though her motivations at no point changed, merely her desperation, as the very situation she was written as being in to make her sympathetic in the first place was actively worsening in a very real and tangible way)....like that’s fucking deliberate. The only point of that, narratively speaking, is for the writers to make the case like, this is WHY Ava does this, but see, now she’s gone too far, her reasons are an explanation but not an EXCUSE, this isn’t defensible at this point.

Y’know, kinda like I pointed out Hank and Hope’s motivations are perfectly understandable and an explanation for their actions, but not an excuse for the way they prioritize them over Scott’s motivations and concerns. Cuz just like Hank and Hope are essentially the villains of Scott’s story in my eyes, for that, the deliberate shift from focusing the spotlight on Ava’s motivations to focusing it on her increasingly ‘unhinged’ actions happens solely to ensure audiences SEE Ava as the villain even if technically there’s a worse, ‘true’ villain and we’re reminded by the end of the story to be sympathetic to Ava’s situation - once Janet has deigned to make that argument in her support. An argument that never would have needed making, mind you, if the narrative had kept the focus on how understandable Ava’s motivations were the whole time, instead of shifting that focus to the effect it had on the heroes, the ‘good guys’ ergo how could anyone hurting them be anything but the bad guy.

But my point here is like, Hollywood at least gets that when they have villains of color or other marginalizations, they have to at least make an effort to make them sympathetic....so long as its implicitly understood that no matter how sympathetic their actions, they’re still misguided. Still WRONG. Still not in the right. Like the good guys. The heroes.

Except....lol. AVA AND BILL WEREN’T WRONG. EVER. AT ANY POINT. THEIR MOTIVATIONS WERE EVERY BIT AS UNDERSTANDABLE, RATIONAL, AND JUSTIFIABLE AS HANK AND HOPE AND SCOTT’S. THE ENTIRE TIME.

And that’s the NEW (not new as in recent, just new as in latest) problem with how Hollywood writes marginalized villains....they put just enough thought into seeing things from their eyes that they’re able to craft sympathetic origins and motivations at all....and then they very firmly and deliberately slam on the brakes the second they’ve done that. REFUSING to go any further, to take that one step more...and not even because they can’t, but because they KNOW....that has the capacity to outright FLIP who is the villain and who is the hero in the story.

Because its literally all just about the framing. Scott and Hope and Hank aren’t the good guys because their needs and wants are better or purer than Bill and Ava’s. They’re the good guys for the SOLE reason that all of those characters have equally human wants and desires, and THESE are the ones the writers chose to present to their viewers as the good guys. To single out and say via their contexts and framing and the choices they WRITE every character making....in comparison, relative to everyone else in the film, THESE are the characters who are MOST right. MOST valid. And thus who you’re expected to support.

You could have written this EXACT SAME STORY from Ava and Bill’s POVs, called it Goliath and the Ghost (Goliath is comic book Bill Foster’s superhero code name)....and Ava and Bill would have been the heroes, while Hank Pym was the villain.

THE. EXACT. SAME. STORY.

Because the thing about Ava and Bill’s actions being understandable, the thing the writers and director KNEW and thus took actual, deliberate steps to COUNTER, so Ava and Bill DIDN’T end up stealing the designated ‘hero’ roles of the film....is that by virtue of their motivations being sympathetic, understandable....THEY WERE AS RIGHT AS ANYONE ELSE IN THE MOVIE.

We are all the heroes of our own stories. We are all the villains of someone else’s. That’s not just a cliche, a platitude. It’s like....a writing lesson. It’s literally JUST about the framing. JUST about who you focus on, who you CHOOSE to uphold as right and wrong, or right and more right.

Ava and Bill weren’t wrong. The movie just put every effort into making sure audiences were left with the takeaway (effectively speaking, not nominally)...that Hank and Hope were MORE right.

I leave Scott out because again, he was just kinda along for the ride here. His motivations remained as static as anyone else’s....he wanted to help, but as long as his daughter always came first....and thus Scott got pulled along in any direction those with more power and agency than him pulled on those particular threads. Characters can be just as influenced by the focus they’re exposed to as audiences. Scott’s exposure was to Hank first and foremost, thus just like the audience’s exposure was more to Hank than to Bill and Ava, Hank got more chances to explain HIS side of the story, HIS motivations, HIS reasons to Scott than Bill and Ava did. Just as is true of audiences. If Scott had met Bill first, for instance, if Bill had given Scott Goliath tech instead of Hank giving Scott Ant-Man tech, if Bill was the one Scott had more history with, personal investment in, and reasons to hear out...its every bit as likely Scott would have been on Bill and Ava’s side all along. Just like, again, is true of audiences. If every scene where Hank got to explain his version of events, his reasons for doing what he did back in the days of SHIELD and his associations with Bill and Ava’s father....if those scenes had instead been giving to Bill doing exactly the same thing, again.....audiences would have been just as likely to land Team Bill and Ava than the team the writers WANTED them to land on.

Because when everyone has a reason for doing what they’re doing, especially when everyone has a GOOD and understandable and SYMPATHETIC reason for what they’re doing...and these reasons lead to choices that put them in conflict with each other....

For all intents and purposes, its all the same at that point. Which means the ones who end up being the good guys, the heroes of the story, is PURELY the result of the intentional, deliberate choice writers make as to WHO they push forward and support as the ones whose motivations and choices we’re MOST meant to sympathize with, to identify with, and thus cheer for.

And that’s where Hollywood keeps failing time and time again with marginalized villains. Racism has literally written Hollywood into a corner where they obstinately INSIST on staying cuz racists gonna racist. That’s ultimately what it boils down to. As uncomfortable as it makes people to hear, even something like this film is inherently as white supremacist as any MAGA-hat wearing propaganda spewer.

Because along with the deliberate choice to make marginalized villains sympathetic and not alienate marginalized or socially conscious centered audiences that way......Hollywood continues to make the equally deliberate choice to KEEP those marginalized characters as the villains. Instead of ever pushing that exploration of their motivations, that focus on their choices....just a little bit further....just far enough to tilt the scales, flip the frame, and make them the heroes of the story instead.

And when you’re talking about black villains in particular, like with this story, yup, sorry not sorry, that’s white supremacy. Even if its not the particularly obvious, ‘ugly’ aggressive kind....that’s still a deliberate upholding of white motivations as Most Valid, for no other reason than to keep the white characters the MOST sympathetic...and thus the heroes.

When your black villains are ONLY villains because you literally refuse to LET them be the heroes, if it comes at the expense of white characters you yourself have written to be as not any more or less understandable than them, just that you’ve made the decision to be more personally invested in.....that’s literally upholding the white characters as ‘supreme’, narratively speaking, because they’re white, and you’re white, and that’s all that matters at the end of the day.

*Shrugs* Anyway, ultimately my take is there’s a lot to like about Ant-Man and the Wasp, from certain angles. Scott’s a likable protag with a solid and relatable characterization, when the narrative chooses to uphold and support him. There’s funny bits, there’s nice, soft moments. I like that it was a superhero story where the inciting events and ultimate mission had a smaller, more contained focus than saving the world, that it was ultimately about saving family, using superpowers and superpowered stakes to go above and beyond in rescue or defense of individuals rather than only justifying such powers and stakes in defense of society or civilization at large....I think that’s a good note that a lot of superhero movies moving forward can benefit from. Tighter focus works just as well as broader focus so long as you use either appropriately.

But all that said....nope. Not good enough. Because also at the end of the day, IMO, like I said, its still a racist, classist movie singing the same old song with Hollywood and Marvel/Disney specifically, just willfully refusing to switch to another channel.

Because it didn’t need to be Scott’s story and it definitely didn’t need to be Hope and Hank’s. It could’ve just as easily been Ava’s story. It could’ve just as compellingly been her heroes’ journey. Self-empowerment, saving yourself from what others have done to you, is just as valid and defensible as saving a mother.

And the second they wrote Ava, who they initially had take off her mask to stand revealed as an exhausted and frightened young woman who went and curled up alone in some high-tech chamber to sleep....the second they took that same young woman they’d CHOSEN to write and introduce as sympathetic and understandable, that they’d introduced in such a way WITH INTENT....and then had her threaten Scott’s innocent daughter, with her own ally and father figure Bill then WRITTEN, with intent, as calling her out for this and threatening to abandon her if she does it, literally saying the words that she was going too far and thus signalling the writers’ clear stance that this made her now unsympathetic, this was a choice that was bad and thus she was now less valid and sympathetic than the heroes the writers still stood behind and supported, she was now less likely to ‘upstage’ them and steal audiences’ sympathies and support from them for herself instead....

That’s the second the movie fucked up and went just from uncomfortably classist but nothing new to just full on Nope, Fuck This Addition, IMO.

Because that was a conscious choice on the part of everyone involved. Willful intent. That was a giant Bat signal advertising that at least on some level, not even that deep, the writers were AWARE of how sympathetic they’d made Ava (how they’d intentionally made Ava)....and them then literally pulling back from that, BUILDING brakes for whatever train of thought Ava’s storyline had people heading down until then. Keeping her, narratively speaking, in her place. As a villain. Where they wanted her to be, and to stay.

And that’s just as fucking evil as any number of movies where the black character dies first or the gay character dies in their lover’s arms or any number of other more focused-on tropes known for their racism, homophobia, transphobia and the like.

When you set out to make your marginalized villains sympathetic and then put a CAP, a CEILING, on how sympathetic towards them you want audiences to be, when you say “I want you to understand them, just not enough to root for them,” when you make every effort to advertise “I see this character’s humanity, that they’re fundamentally no different from me, from any of these other heroes, they’re all the same....I’m just choosing to keep the white ones the heroes anyway”....fuck you. Honestly, that’s as bad as any other more obvious racism. That’s as much propaganda as any other instance.

I want people to care, just not care too much....because they still gotta care about the white character most....

Nope. Fuck ‘em. Burn it with the rest of the MCU’s trashiest takes. Scott Lang is Valid and Cassie Lang is precious, I really truly adore any focus on a single dad whose entire world honestly revolves around his kid, and I’ll read all the found family fic where its the Langs teaming up with Bill Foster and Ava Starr, but this narrative was bad, These Are Not the Heroes You’re Looking For, and Hank and co. can go fuck off to the quantum realm where their irrelevance can finally be equal to their ego.

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ralfstrashcan · 6 years ago

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3x11 Reaction / Commentary

So I haven't even started the episode and I'm already confused.

Why did Netflix put 3B in a separate folder? I mean, they didn't with 2B. What's the matter with that. Or is this just the German Netflix??

Smoooooothe move. Somewhere Derek Hale is smiling proudly.

Wtf why they so slow. I was half expecting this to be a simulation or sth because they took ages to arrive and then were walking super chill???

Seelie guy doesn't use this obvious distraction of the others to try and escape, since he knows he's just a minor character and shouldn't interfere.

Beautiful grieving sequence, especially Jace with the sketch of himself. I knew there would be a portrait of him in there before he even turned the page, I could feel it. I love how sensitive and therefore predictable the show is.

Ooooh nooooo Clary is still aliiiiiive, who whould have thought?!?!?! Okay sorry haha I had to.

lol didn't he look in a mirror recently and realize there's still no real resemblance? I mean, at least now he's not charred anymore, so I guess there's more resemblance than before, but you know what I mean. And I get it, this is supposed to be a parallelism to Lilith saying the same thing, but if memory serves right, at this point in time Jonathan was a) in a thick glass casket and b) dead so I'm wondering how he could have heard that.

wtf I'm getting sooo mixed signals from him. Does he want to give off creeper vibes or play house? Because he's kinda doing both?? Play Creeper House???

YEAH LITERALLY I WANT TO SEE THEIR HEATING BILLS

This...... doesn't sound as reassuring as it sounded in your head, Jonathan.

So, points for Clary for that ploy, but my heart is already pre-emptively breaking for Jonathan when he finds out she's playing him. The poor guy just wants family after being used and abused his whole life, man. Is that too much to ask.

More points for Clary for being sensible and grabbing a coat!!

“Clary, come on. You can't go out there. You're never gonna survive.”

Hahaha that had me laughing out loud. So Clary.

Okay, minus points for Clary for not actually wearing the coat. You had a winning streak of common sense but all good things must end, I guess.

Picturesque. But, uh, since Jonathan isn't following her she could slow down. And if she was a Slytherin, she would have waited til after breakfast with her daring escape.

LISTEN I LOVE THIS CASUAL DOMESTICITY

Also if you're more make-up versed than I am (which, admittedly, isn't very hard) and realized something was off about the way Magnus held that eyeliner stick (?) then check lynne-monstr's eyeliner salt club tag because it's hilarious. I also want to rec volunteer_of_hufflepuff's fic smile even though your heart is breaking because it's awesome.

...........................really. Really. That's how they want to play it? Ugh, okay. Ugh.

You know, I've had a whole lengthy extensive (dare I say exhaustive) rant ripening in my head since I saw this bit in the sneak peek but I'm just not in the mood, so let me cut it short: I get Simon's reaction emotionally, since losing Clary must be a horrible experience for him, but I'm still bitter about early 3A where blasting that werewolf across Taki's yard and knowing he might never walk again didn't bother Simon for one second. Repercussions should always matter, regardless of how close you are to the person affected.

Oh dear, she's still running. And her hair still looks like that?

Sure. Also

How can he keep up with her when he's walking and she's running? I mean he's not that much taller than her. Or does she run ten feet, pause to gasp and pant a little, runs again, stop and go, y'know? So on average she's just powerwalking.

Ok srsly I need to stop this nonsensical commentary.

Yeah and I guess he didn't notice the Clave-approved vampire-torture-sunlight construction Aldertree installed in this very same office (shown in 2x04 if you care to remember).

........who are you and what did you do to Alec Lightwood? You seriously want to tell me he'd consider not bringing up a violation of the Accords, and more importantly power abuse and torture, because of political reasons and he's “scared” to lose his standing with Jia? Please. He'd be enforcing Clave law. He'd be well within his right. We're talking about the guy who flat out refused to do the Inquisitor's bidding because it went against his moral code. Compared to that, this is a walk in the park. So. Please.

“I understand the kind of pain you're in, Jace.”

“No you don't. I'm sorry, you don't.”

“You're right...

Oh my god this isn't about Clary, or at least not for the most part. Jace is frikking traumatized because he wasn't in control of his body or his actions or his frakking mind for days. Btw I'm actually impressed and surprised they bothered to focus on anything but the Clary-Drama, namely Jace second-hand-killing like 33 people. And Imogen. And almost Alec. The way I see Jace he'll focus on his guilt, not the pain he feels over Clary's loss. Clary will be on his mind and that's one more thing to feel shitty about, because how can he be so selfish and think about his own pain when he brought so much more pain on other people? Jace has an incredibly intricately self-destructive mind and I love how it was portrayed here. Also loved the scene in general with some Izzy&Jace sibling feels, the tender way she talks to him, his kiss to her hand. But the focus (mainly because of Izzy) returning to Clary annoyed me a little.

And by the way, there is one person who can understand Jace. Alec. Because he was possessed by a demon and forced to kill someone, too. Granted, he doesn't have the memories of the action itself, but he saw it on tape. He blames himself because the demon fed off his own hate against Jocelyn. So I would really really love to see those two talking about it. I'm extremely thrilled to watch on and see if they do (but lol kinda hoping they don't because then I can finish writing my ficlet about it, which I sadly didn't manage to before 3B aired).

MY LIFE EXPECTANCY JUST INCREASED BY AT LEAST FIVE YEARS OKAY

Also what a damn badass nightlight, I want one as well even though I hate not to sleep in absolute darkness, that's how pretty this is.

HAHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHA I C A N ' T

ALEC'S OFFENDED FACE AS IF THIS IS NEWS TO HIM

Wow I'm so glad they didn't forget about Iris. I was scared, not gonna lie.

Tbh I don't find Madzie's reaction that realistic. I mean, Valentine – the first person to talk to her after she got ripped from her normal life in her normal home – told her Clary got Iris into trouble. At some point they must have told her that Iris isn't coming back. But did they really tell her Iris was breeding warlocks? I highly doubt that. At most they told her Iris did some bad things. But, since they probably said the same thing about Valentine (and he was always “nice” to her) and told her Clary wasn't in fact evil, that kind of loses its meaning. And let's not forget, she is a child. A probably traumatized child, I might add, since Valentine used her to literally kill at least ten Shadowhunters that we see on screen, likely more. Her perception of what is right and what is wrong is easily swayed. And personally I think she neither really registered that Iris is supposed to be the bad guy now nor that living with Catarina / Magnus and Alec is sooooo much better than living with Iris ever was, so her having such a strong opposition against going with Iris seems unrealistic to me.

Love this. So good.

This is actually really beautiful

This is actually really dramatic for no reason and I'm soooo here for it.

Soooooo am I the only one wondering why the F Cat didn't put some wards on Magnus's place? I mean????? There is no explanation given for that, and frankly I can't come up with one. If not for Magnus, then Cat would at least put wards there while Madzie stays with him. Or....... do they want to imply Cat doesn't know that he lost his magic?? Hä?! If so, who the hell patched Alec back up from his neat little life-threatening arrow wound? Cuz I had assumed it was Cat. Since, y'know Jace pleaded with Magnus to help Alec, implying (to me at least) that an iratze alone wouldn't cut it this time. Except of course, if he asked because he didn't want to be bothered with taking out his stele and activating Alec's healing rune, but when Magnus refused because no magic he had no other choice.... and let's be real, the first scene of this episode heavily implies that a healing rune can cure just about anything in 0.3 seconds flat.

Alec wanting to bench Magnus makes no sense. Keeping him around and/or at the Institute makes more sense than, oh I don't know, telling him to stay in his loft where there are no wards. Wtf is logic anyway, right?

I liked this scene, don't get me wrong but... what's with the tough love? Alec isn't usually like that?? He's soft and firm reassurance, not aggressive and authoritative reassurance. Did he try that route before and it didn't work?? I need some answers.

“I had no idea.”

“How could you? You weren't there.”

“Me leaving had nothing to do with Simon. I just needed to be alone.

Okay, what, am I supposed to blame Maia now for needing time for and taking care of herself? She's so defensive as if her leaving was objectively wrong, and it wasn't.

“I guess when times get tough, some people need to be alone. And others need to be around other people.

Please, this is a dirty lie. Remind me again, who was it that pushed Alec away after he found out about her yin fen addiction, insisted she could handle it on her own, ran away and finally confiding in some random stranger she had just met? It wasn't Maia. Who stayed up late all night, disregarding her own emotions and rather tearing herself apart trying to fix the drama of her brothers than to mention to anyone she wasn't alright? Wasn't Maia either.

I feel strongly about this because this seems like a really cheap way to break up Saia and set up Sizzy and I don't like cheap things. I don't like Sizzy either, but my main demand is quality, not a certain content. I'll accept Sizzy if it's done correctly. But this isn't it. This is laying blame on a character who's not to blame, and making claims about another character that are plain untrue if you look at the last three seasons.

I've said it before, there would be good ways to break up Saia. For example their attitude to violence differs greatly from one another. Maia is trigger-happy and sees no harm in it, Simon is more or less pacifistic (at least when he's not having his I-don't-care-about-anything-but-my-gig-mood). Creating a conflict out of this would have been in character. Claiming Maia is somehow to blame because she wasn't there is not only unfair, but also invalidating all Maia has done for Simon before, and that was a lot. Putting up with her shitty ex, helping him search for Lilith, fighting her own pack so they don't bully him. She was about to have a face-off with the Seelie Queen – the very same creature that held her hostage not too long ago – just to be by his side. Is that all suddenly not worth anything anymore, just because she had the audacity to take a little time for herself, to sort through her own issues?

Seriously, he let her walk in that? No wonder she collapsed. Jonathan should have gotten her nice hiking boots.

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS

CAN WE JUST.... CAN WE...... APPRECIATE.......... HOW HE BATS ALL HER MAGIC ATTACKS AWAY....... LIKE............ MAGNUS................ H O W

Btw if this is supposed to sway me and make me see that benching Magnus would have been the right call, then it's not working, because fine, let's assume Magnus had gone home. Then Iris would have had an even easier job to snatch him away, because a) no wards and b) no sword. And on top of that Alec wouldn't have had a way of knowing that Magnus was even taken, since I doubt Iris would have let Magnus call or text him.

Do you even know that? I'd like to see what you're willing to do after being tortured for ten years. Just saying. But fine. Stay there on your high horse.

Ohmygod I am stunned. I couldn't have written that summation any better and to be honest I had assumed the show would just blackpaint Jonathan as evil villain and be done with it. This is so much more than I expected. I am impressed. (And of course now I hope that there will be a redemption arc for Jonathan, but I'm afraid I'm setting myself up for heartbreak with this one.)

Do they intend to tell me that this whole place is warmed by the fireplace? Why not by a heater? Since the three billion lamps

imply there's electricity somewhere. Or was that line about firewood just Jonathan's way to exit the scene? Who knows.

“Ollie? Doesn't remember a thing. Praetor was good about getting her and Samantha relocated. New identities. They're safe now, like everyone else.”

I'm still high-key bitter about this. I love Ollie a great deal, okay, so this is a pretty disappointing solution to outsource her from the plot. Just let her forget all the shit so she doesn't have to deal with trauma. Guess she thinks now her mother died in an explosion caused by a gas leakage or something. I wonder what the mundane police has to say about that and how long it'll take them to find her, since, y'know, they have evidence against her and all that.

Edit: This doesn't actually make sense if you think about it. Did Ollie just get dropped into a witness protection program for no reason she can remember? Or does that “new identities” actually mean they have completely new identities because they don't remember ANYTHING from their old life?? I need answers.

I get it. This is supposed to make me see how rundown and wasted Luke is. But is he purposefully trying to make himself look like a confused hobo? I mean couldn't he like, prepare the notes he wanted to show Jace? It's like he's trying to reinforce to Jace he shouldn't listen to a thing Luke says because these are clearly the actions of a desperate man. Presentation is half the battle man, man.

Hah, badass. There's a reason I love him.

I totally dig Magnus in his kiddie clothes, but I also need a lot of answers because there's blood on his hands and bodies at his feet and this doesn't look like magic gone haywire, this looks like a massacre and I need answers. I wonder if they're gonna explain this flash or just let it sit there uncommented. (I hope they address it and I hope it has something to do with Asmodeus and their time together.)

Ugh do I honestly have to reiterate that parking Magnus in his ward-less loft wouldn't have helped? Also, he's a grown-ass man and can make decisions for himself, dammit.

Owning up to his mistakes unrestrainedly. There's a reason I have a soft spot for Raphael.

New York, huh? What a coincidence. Wouldn't want him to live somewhere else and have Maia burn through the other half of her paycheck to pay some warlock to portal them again, right?

Also, not to be controversial, but why don't they ask the Praetor first? Since they had a whole ass book on the mark of cain and everything. And figured out what it is. And getting rid of something so dangerous is basically their job. I mean. Just saying.

You know I always marvel at this. Just because he's old he knows shit? Is there really an age where knowledge pops into your head just because? Because I'm still waiting for that to happen to me, let me tell you. Just like being immortal somehow grants you immediate access to celebrities and the questionable honor to be in the midst of all historical events of the slightest relevance? Srsly if I was immortal I'd still be glued to my lappy and hate going out.

LOL give Iris a front row seat on how you smashed her XD XD XD

IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE

<3 <3 <3

This exchange thing is a ploy, and to be honest, a painfully obvious one. I find it really kinda hard to believe Iris falls for it. What I've been asking myself since this plot line started is, why didn't Iris have that idea herself? Like, I honestly expected her to use Magnus as a hostage and tell Alec he either hand over Madzie or she'll kill Magnus. Makes way more sense than her just trying to find Madzie herself and then what, try to break her out again? That didn't work last time, and since the warlocks are warned by Magnus's abduction it'd be even unlikelier to work now. I get it plot-wise since it'd be a little awkward if Iris out-blackmailed the Shadowhunters, but like. Seriously. What's the in-universe-explanation for this???

I don't know why, but Magnus looks super cute in this shot.

Five bucks say this is Izzy with a shapeshifting rune, and ISTG if this is actually Madzie then I can just shake my head at them.

Okay, I totally dig Lightwood siblings working together but. Why do you have to simultaneously hurt me with plot holes.

1) Where did they get Seelie Magic? Did they employ Meliorn? Srlsy. Also, the Seelie Magic at the beginning of the episode could move so why was Illusion!Madzie standing there like a display dummy? That was super suspicious.

2) Why didn't they use a shapeshifting rune? The illusion would have held longer, Izzy could have gotten closer and tied Iris up more easily, without Magnus getting smashed first. But, drama I guess.

3) Where the f is Catarina? Please. Her ward almost gets kidnapped and all she does is go “Oh shit, gotta relocate her to some other High Warlock lol.” Her best friend gets kidnapped and all she does is go “Oh shit, but whatever, here have a fake ransom note but don't think I'll move my ass from this super important Bitching and Drinking Conference. I payed like 200 bucks to get in.” Wtf. This is shitty ooc behavior from her. Wtf. She's either suuuuuper confident that Alec and Izzy will get Magnus back no problem, or she doesn't give a shit about him, and sorry, I don't believe either of those two options.

HAHAHA I'M SCREAMING LOOOOOL!!! Is this code for “We wanted to kill her but Lilith was quicker so we'll pretend we weren't even interested in killing her in the first place”? The Clave, man. Always good for a laugh.

No, dummy, this is their R&D Department.

I'm not even kidding, remember 2x04:

Oh the good old times.

This was. Really good. Really. I'm like, reeling. I feel like show writers read too many fanfics and therefore the Malec scenes this ep were exquisite. Magnus evasively running around and not liking his “powerlessness.” Alec there to reassure him with the sweetest of words. Their kiss, not to short, but hard and determined, with feeling. Top tier shit.

Wow, even though the words that left their mouths were reassuring and good it still feels like their relationship is suddenly dying. I wonder why that is? Oh, right. Because Sizzy, that's why.

I love.

Ooooh guess the residual electricity finally ran out. And I guess Clary turned all the candles off to match the mood? Also, since it was dark outside before and now isn't anymore.... was Jonathan out collecting firewood the entire night? That's dedication, man.

.......what a coincidence that their healing rune is in the exact same spot. On that note, I've been wondering.... if the ressurection resetted his skin to a state it hasn't been in for ten years, effectively un-charring it, shouldn't his runes have disappeared as well? Did he spend the “days” Clary was sleeping with putting runes all over himself?? On that note, why the hell did Clary have to sleep for days when Jonathan was the one who came back from the dead? All that Clary did was running at Simon in slow motion. I mean, I know what I would find more taxing.

I soooo appreciate the blood on her teeth. Such care for detail <3

Okay, so I realize that this makes Jonathan look like a fanatic, but I actually understand this scene like this: He's not an idiot. He knew Clary wasn't really going to give him a chance. But this, this is his chance, because now she has no choice but to stick with him and see for herself.

Btw if you're wondering why I'm so pro Jonathan, you can read the beginning of this post where I got out all of my Jonathan Feels. Basically, until I actually see him act intrinsically evil I refuse to believe all hope is lost for him. He did terrible things, yes, and he's aware of that, but the way I see it he did them because he wasn't ever presented with an alternate choice. And now that he has one, he's holding onto it tooth and nail. He wants to leave all the pointless violence behind.

I'm aware he's a sadistic psycho in the books, but this wouldn't be the first time the show gave a character a make-over (for the better) and so far the only compelling piece of evidence on the show in favor of Jonathan's demon blood causing him to be unsavably evil was Jocelyn's vision of him killing a flower as a baby, and it's not even clear if that was intentional. So excuse me if that's not enough for me to write him off.

Gif Sources: Malec cheek kiss, Magnus being cutesy with his croc impression, Magnus brandishing his sword *facepalm* you know what I mean, Magnus batting Iris's magic away

#shadowhunters #alec lightwood #magnus bane #jace wayland #clary fray #isabelle lightwood #jonathan morgenstern #simon lewis #maia roberts #luke garroway #jia penhallow #raphael santiago #malec #magnus is badass #reaction

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tellywoodtrash · 6 years ago

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ishqbaaz 16+17.08.18 lb

16.08.18

LMAO, TU HAI KAUN AISI GUARANTEE DENE KO??????? ANIKA GAADI HAI KYA AUR TU USKA DEALER?

yup, he was gonna say “main shaadi ALREADY kar chuka hoon” but caught himself in time in order to not complicate matters for her wrt marrying nikhil.

BUT ARE NIKHIL AND HIS MOTHER BLIND? CAN’T THEY SEE SHE’S WEARING SINDOOR???????? SHE’S OBVIOUSLY MARRIED TO SOMEONE. you gotta be reaaaalllll dumb to not figure this shit out, you two.

lmfao ok i think i might be a fan of nikhil’s mummy for that parting shot of doosron ko gyaan dena bada asaan hai.

ohhhhhhhh man. these three are gonna be hellllllllla mad when they find out.

“kya kaha tuney???”

anika ke maan-sammaan-khushiyon ka rakshak is onnnnn the case!

pfffffffffffft. iski shakl se hi pata nahi chalta ki kya kiya isne?

you three were dumbasses to think that. they need SUPERVISED MEDIATION. aise akele chodoge toh aisa hi hoga.

UGH SHIVAAY YOU ARE LITERALLY THE WORST. HAR SHAADI TUM KO ZABARDASTI HI KARWAANI HAI, MAJAAAAAL HAI JO TUM DULHAN SE POOCHO KI USSE KYA CHAHIYE.

srsly, i am nikhil’s mom, who’s like why the fuckkkkk are you so involved in anika and nikhil’s shaadi. tu apna dekh na.

great, he’s ready to fund it also. ek kaam kar, anika ka kanyaadaan bhi tu hi kar. itnaaaaaaa shauk jo chadha hai.

yeah i have had it up to here with stupid singh oberoi. ugh.

^^^^^ that’s the point i stopped watching at on the 16th. i literally rolled my eyes so damn hard that i decided it was better for my health if i gave up.

okay! let’s try again!

this nikhil ki ma is such a meesni. die bitch.

ohhohohoho, anika is MOST definitely going to find about this eventually aur tab beta, tumhari khair nahi. i hope OU anika ki atma gets into her and she fucken beats you to death with her broken chameli.

is anika ko job milkar kya faida? iske personal life ke chonchlon se isko time hi kahaan milta hai job par jaane ke liye?

ugh why are you even picking up this idiot’s call??? you’re 0.0% interested in him.

lmao gauri’s face.

and gauri’s expression being paralleled here on shivaay’s face.

DAMN GIRL THE EXCITEMENT. WHO IN THIS DAY AND AGE IS EVER THIS EXCITED TO GET AN ACTUAL PHONE CALL?

lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooooo oh man nikhil, samajh jao apni aukaat aur haisiyat.

... what’s with the weird split-screening? that too, not perfectly in the middle and gauri’s awkwardly to the side and half cut off? matlab...???????

adorable munchkin. too cute, too pure.

lol that "whooooooo boy” expression shivaay gave after nikhil left.

holllllllly shit what’s with the hella bad green screen behind him???? that’s soooooooooo not the view outside anika’s house???

anika honestly girl, calm the fuck down.

or don’t and tell him the truth; that you’re majorly into him.

OH SHIT. OH NO SHE’S GONNA THINK HE MEANS HIS AND HER SHAADI WHILE THIS FUCKING IDIOT MAN IS TALKING ABOUT NIKHIL OH GOD AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I CAN’T WATCH THIS I CAN’TTTTTTTTTT

JFC FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK YOU SHIVAAAY THIS IS FUCKING ENTRAPMENT. HONESTLY FUCK YOU TO THE DEPTHS OF HELL MAN. IDGAF ABOUT YOUR GOOD INTENTIONS. THIS IS BULLSHIT.

oh noooooooooo my poor girl she’s so happy oh god nooooooooooo.

JFC SHIVAAY YOU FUCKING IDIOT ARE YOU SO CLUELESS THAT YOU DON’T REALISE THAT THIS WOMAN IS HUGGING YOU IN AN ENTIRELY NON “DOST“ WAY RN????????????????///

oh suddenly he realises that perhaps he shouldn’t be hugging another man’s woman in this way.

notice neither of them are moving to untangle themselves though. still remaining all pressed up against each other. and you dumb fucks still say you don’t know “kya hai humaare beech”.

sure. extreeeeeemely appropriate behaviour and manner of looking at a woman whose wedding you’re organizing to another man. A+. keep it up.

all i can do at this point is hope gauri’s secretly taking pics and will make a presentation of her own at the next wedding attempt to nikhil.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaand he ruined it.

sidenote: this is a nakuul smile, not a shivaay smile.

cute smile aside, i really wanna slapppppp shivaay for how giddily happy he’s being at his own stupidity. matlab self-awareness naam ki cheez is bande ke aas-paas bhi nahi bhatki hai.

anika, now would be a good time to take off your chameli. and channel all that khidkitodness you claim to possess.

we already knew nikhil and his whole fam were shadyass fuckers. ainvayi ka dramatic reveal they’re showing, as if any of this is a completeeeee surprise to any of us.

ANIKA WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? YEH TOH CHUTIYA HAI HI, WHY CAN’T YOU JUST STRAIGHT UP TELL HIM THAT YOU DON’T GIVE A SINGLE FUCK ABOUT NIKHIL?????? YOU DIDN’T EVEN THE FIRST TIME AROUND, LET ALONE NOW.

... after happily leaping into his arms thinking he was proposing marriage, she’s saying “mujhe nahi pata meri khushi kis mein hai”??????????? godddddddddd she’s an even bigger fucking idiot than he is.

OMFG IS MANDHBUDDHI KI BAKCHODI KHATAM NAHI HUI HE’S NOW GETTING DOWN ON HIS KNEES TO PROPOSE.... FOR NIKHIL.

“mujhse shaadi karogi, anika?”

aaaaaahaaa. freudian slip.

lmaoooooooo “bohut khush rakhunga main... nikhil... NIKHIL!” sure boo. ek baar hua, woh galti thi. baar baar jo hota hai... chalo chodo. tumse bolke bhi kya faayda.

TFW you really can’t tell who the bigger idiot is in your relationship.

... great. just great. yeh log bhi aa gaye. AUR CHACHI BHI. UGH.

yup. i am that literal full body shudder that anika does every single time nikhil touches her. ICK. GET YO GRUBBY HANDS OFF MY GIRL.

caaaaaaaasual smiley threat from shivaay about how he’ll literally destroy nikhil if he fucks up. best.

they are me and i am them. not amused by any of this garbage.

has this chachi really sudharofied? dare i hope? in any case, her toning down her overall personality is very much welcome.

SHIVAAY I... YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU DID WHAT YOU HAVE TO, NOW PLEASE, JUST LITERALLY GTFO HERE. UGH.

jali. billu ki jali. itni der tak idk where his fucking brain was, but it’s finally hit him.

haan jaa beta, maarofy your hasty exit. go rub your literally aching chest somewhere else.

god you poor dumbass. i don’t even... ugh shivaaaaaaay, what are we even going to do with youuuuuu??????????

also sorry for untimely tharak but this blue suit is realllllllllllly working on him. especially in this lighting. brings out his eyes nicely.

also, somehow the makeup or whatever is better in this scene? his eyebags aren’t so prominent.

oh boy. khuddar waali anika jaag gayi hai. she’s come to question.

“kyunki sab kuch aap decide karte hain na? na aapne mujhe tab poocha tha jab aapne mujhse zabardasti shaadi ki, na tab poocha jab aapne shaadi ko maanne se inkaar kiya, na aapne mujhse tab poocha jab divorce papers thamaa diye, na ab jab aapne nikhil aur uske maa se meri shaadi ki baat ki.”

YAS CALL HIM THE FUCK OUT.

“kyunki tum meri.... DOST ho.”

LMAO. APPROPRIATE RESPONSE.

“meri shaadi ko dus din nahi hue... aur mera DOST meri doosri shaadi karwaana chahta hai. aapko lagta hai yeh sahi hai??”

GIRL YES FUCKING MURDER HIM.

ah fuck. he’s losing it and almost in tears. fuck i’m kinda melting. he’s trying so hard. he’s objectively wrong, but he’s TRYING SO HARD.

NO. DO NOT LEAVE IT ON FUCKING KISMAT, USE YOUR FUCKING BIG GIRL WORDS AND TELL HIM YOU DON’T WANNA MARRY FUCKING NIKHIL. JFC ANIKA.

ugh you two idiotssssssssssssss.

lord this tu jaane na makes me want to stab myself in the eye with a rusty fork. the music of this whole redux truly sucks ass.

17.08.18

LMAO OM AS USUAL COMES THROUGH FOR ALL OF US, WITH THE FUCKING DISBELIEF AND RAGE AND WANTING TO THROTTLE BILLU.

same here with gauri. god bless my sensible little chirraiyya. anika for fucks’ sake listen to her. honestly.

lmao rikara’s faces at the whole “kismat” nonsense. tell me they take things into their own hands and become the “kismat” writers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

... itna toh yeh prinku ke shaadi ke liye bhi utaavla nahi tha jitna khud ki biwi ki shaadi karwaane ke liye ho raha hai. someone get this man some help.

at least these two are having their fun!

also tell me they have some kinda plan in place, and that’s why they’re so chill and happy.

snort.

oh boy. dramatic music says something’s gonna happen with the lights.

yup. isko jhatka lagne waala hai. in more ways than one; but right now mostly of the electric kind.

oh ho nope! doosra jhatka first!

sure. the way every wedding planner looks at the bride. like they wanna marry them themselves.

god bless prinku and her sass 4ever.

and these two and their beautiful faces! honestly, masha’Allah.

“aapke bhaiyya satiyaa gayein hain. kya kar kya rahein hain????” lmaooooooooo

OMFG OMKI SHOMKI FINALLY MAKING SOME KINDA FUCKING MOVE. GODBLESS, HALLELUJAH!

YES THEY’RE GONNA BE LIVING HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ANYTHING ELSE BUT RIKARA LIVING UNDER THE SAME ROOFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!

lmao anika’s also started daant chabaana at this man and his fuckery.

no literally who the fuck are all these fucking guests??????

OH MY GOD MY GIRL LOOKS SOOOOOO GOOOOOD.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, of course!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am literally putting nazar ka teeka on my laptop screen coz god, how beautiful are they!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“tum theek ho?” eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, lo, the 4 Lions “i love you” bhi ho gaya!

lolololol she’s the cutest.

oh ho, this prinku is on “tu” basis with rudra. meaning they’re around the same age.

also finally, a throwaway line explaining where rudra is!

god he looks so hot today, i can’t.

lolllllllllllllllll prinkuuuuuuuuuuu. you really do thrive off putting your brothers in the most uncomfortable situations ever, and that too with the most insouciant look on your face. I FUCKING LOVE IT.

HOW DARE YOU TWO BE THIS BEAUTIFUL?????????? I CAN’T EVEN LOOK AT YOU STRAIGHT, IT’S LIKE LOOKING AT THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this girl also looking like fire today. the makeup is especially good. i love the glittery blue liner!

of course. also situation is kinda sorta chaapofied from ipk.

lmaoooooooooooooooo her face.

yeah kismat is doing its thang. take the fucking hint. all three of you dumbasses.

meanwhile lol these two and their completely nonplussed faces.

great. nikhil ki mummy is starting her overacting. ouff.

omkara: relax aunty, galti se hua hai.

“kuch galtiyaan kitni khoobsurat hoti hai!”

lmaooooooooooooooooooooooo she really is the best.

AAAAAAAAAND THAT’S WHAT YOU CALL “KISMAT” BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

as much as i’m relishing her snark in pointing it out to him, i’m also mad as hell at her for going through with this garbage. ab kahaan gayi teri saari khuddaari bish???? you just gonna do whatever the fuck one man or the other keeps pushing you into????

ugh nikhil literally fuck off. can’t you see two beautiful people were having a moment here? no place here for uggos like you.

ugh this sad puppy. oh shivaay what even do we do with you??????

god i love omkara and his common sense and his not mincing his words. SO MUCH. words can’t even describe. #omkaraisbae

(gosh i haven’t used that hashtag since like, the late 2016s???? i missed it!)

oh suddenly NOW they notice the sindoor. she’s been wearing it for all these days with no maang tika or anything to cover it, tab kya aankhon mein button lage hue the sab ke?????

... and the purpose of this is????????????????

LMAO HOW IS THIS ANY BETTER???? LIKE OK YOU STOPPED HER FROM TELLING THE SECRET BUT SHE LITERALLY RAN OVER TO YOU AND IS FUSSING OVER YOU NOT GIVING A SINGLE FUCK ABOUT NIKHIL AND HIS FAM.

waise they should be used to it by now, na? pehli shaadi mein bhi toh isne yehi kiya tha.

son honestly. what are you even doing. why are you fucking like this???

wow he gave up his own room for her to stay in? or are they staying together till the shaadi or...??? like scene kya hai boss???

billu this bs martyr complex of yours is getting reallllllly tiresome now.

oh god noooooooooooooo not the fucking sindoor too. don’t you fucking dare!!!!!!!!

oh gooood. she called him out on it. literally doing whatever the fuck he wants with zero thoughts on what those symbols mean to her. fucking dumbass.

“meri maang, mera sindoor, meri marzi main lagaoon ya na lagaoon...” GIRL IF YOU CAN BE SO ASSERTIVE RE: ALL THIS WHY THE FUCK CAN’T YOU JUST SHUT DOWN THIS WHOLE FARCE??????????? HONESTLY, MORE THAN SHIVAAY, YOU ARE GETTING ON MY LAST DAMN NERVE RN.

#ishqbaaz #ishqbaaaz #ib episode liveblogs #episode liveblogs

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alabastertouch · 7 years ago

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It’s Not Me | II

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Characters: Composer!Park Chanyeol x brokenhearted!reader; appearances by other idols

Genre: Flangst (lol) (srsly)

Warning/s: Mentions of a toxic relationship, strong language

Summary: After a songwriter broke your heart, you swore you would never do anything that involves music. But when a desperate composer asks for your kind help, will you change your mind?

A/N: I honestly didn’t expect the story to receive so much attention??? Thank you so much to everyone supporting my little scenario thingy going on here! This is also quite unedited so.... HAHAHA anyway have a read!!!

story masterlist

When Seulgi comes home that night, she immediately tackles you in a hug and almost topples you off the couch.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She repeatedly chants, sniffling even, as she embraces you tightly.

“What’s going on, Seul?” You question her, confused by her sudden show of affection.

“Because of you, we reached our sales quota!” She announces, suddenly jostling herself to hang on you. “People loved Smart Norae, and they told me it was because they heard you singing!”

You didn’t quite expect a response like that. You’d expect them to buy it because of its good surround system and the efficiency of picking songs, not because they watched a pathetic girl destress through the newest karaoke technology.

“Glad I could be of help, Seul,” you pat her shoulder. “But I can’t believe you made me sing!”

She sheepishly lets you go, taking a paper-wrapped object from her shoulder bag and hands it over to you. “Just a little something as a token of appreciation.”

You rip the paper off, revealing a brown leather notebook with your name imprinted in calligraphy on its front and an animated drawing of your face.

“A friend of mine started doing some stationery business, so I requested if she can make me a journal for you. I designed it myself, see?” She proudly points at the intricate details of it. “It’s not much, but I know how much you love writing randomly. Use it to write whatever you come up with so you can look at it whenever you feel like it.”

You caress the smooth sheets of paper inside, admiring the way it feels underneath your fingertips. Seulgi always had the eye for the perfect materials, being a triple threat in singing, dancing, and art.

“This is amazing, Seulgi,” you give her a kiss on her cheek. “Thank you so much.”

“Ah, it’s nothing,” she waves you off. “You deserve this, hun. Now, you can write revenge songs about Jihoon and all he had done to you.” A look of anger fills Seulgi’s caramel irises, but you stop her before she can say more.

“We’re not going to go lower than Jihoon, Seul,” you dismiss the idea. “We’re going to be strong women, because that’s what we are, right? Revenge is petty.” Seulgi finds herself agreeing with your words.

You fall into comfortable silence later on, with Seulgi strumming along with her guitar. She is trying to hum some tunes, trying to blend it together with the instrument. But so far, her experimentation is a useless attempt to create her song.

You only use her sweet voice and music to focus on your own work to do… coming up with ways on how to shut the children up without asking Mijoo once again to clean up after you.

“Aha!” She exclaims, as if the best idea had just dawn to her. You let her do her thing, and she writes something down on her paper.

“Finally got a hang of it?” You question, although the answer appears pretty obvious.

“That I do,” Seulgi claps in delight. “This is going to be an amazing one!”

You sure hope it does, so your best friend can stop searching because she doesn’t have to… she deserves the recognition for her talent and expertise.

Soon, you exhale. We’ll get to it soon.

“Look, Chanyeol, this is hopeless!” Junmyeon whines as he fails searching for the girl in the video once again.

“Let’s ask the police, then?” Chanyeol suggests, like asking the authorities for a person’s identity is such a normal thing to do.

“And what, tell them that we’re looking for her because of our singing woes?” Junmyeon deadpans. “No thanks.”

“How about we go to that mall?” Kyungsoo suggests. After being updated by what Chanyeol and Junmyeon have watched and hearing the girl sing, he thinks as well that the girl has an amazing voice that can mix well with his. “Maybe some people there know who she is.”

“Kyungsoo, a mall is a public place. She may not go back there.” Junmyeon rationalizes.

“Or she might,” Kyungsoo optimistically counters. “Look, stop being so darn negative. You’ll never know what could be if you try, right?”

Chanyeol cannot believe how chill Kyungsoo is, even if it is his own comeback at stake. Although he’s usually quiet and peaceful and quite the opposite of Chanyeol, he completes their partnership by being the mediator when Chanyeol gets too much of anything.

“We’ll go,” Chanyeol announces, not giving Junmyeon any room to complain anymore.

“Have you lost your mind?!” The manager lets his wits slip anyway. “What if someone recognizes you there?!”

“I’m not the singer here, hyung. If she’s our last chance to save all of our jobs, then we’ll take what we can get!” Chanyeol ends any future altercations and leaves Junmyeon bitterly swallowing.

Junmyeon’s trials to stop Chanyeol is to no avail, and he finds himself back to the same familiar section of the mall the same afternoon. He just leads Chanyeol to where the shop is, and he finds the Smart Norae machine displayed for everyone to see and try. Instead of the striking orange-haired saleslady, a short male with a roseate mullet (Chanyeol is reminded of John Travolta as Danny Zuko from Grease) is singing through the microphone with his own rendition of I Miss You by Kim Bum Soo.

“Excuse me,” Chanyeol hollers once his little performance is over. “Are you the salesman here?”

“You bet I am!” The guy confirms with a puppy-like small. “Can I help you with anything?”

“Yeah, well, there is something I’m curious about,” Chanyeol does not know where else to start and decides to beat to the point. “Do you happen to know a girl who’s singing here?”

“Sorry?” The salesman steps closer. “Sir, many people try the demo machine here. I don’t think I can help you with that.”

“Wait,” Chanyeol rethinks about it and remembers the clip in Junmyeon’s phone. “Hyung, the video!”

“I’m not helping you out,” Junmyeon scoffs. “This is ridiculous, Chanyeol!”

“If you don’t give it to me within five seconds, you’re fired,” Chanyeol pans, arms cross and voice already monotonous.

“You can’t fire me, Chanyeol. Only the company has the power to do that.” Junmyeon rebuts.

“Look, I don’t have much time for this. My break will be in a few minutes, but you can try and ask my co-worker instead?” The male sheepishly suggests.

“Wait, uh…” Chanyeol asks for his name.

“Baekhyun,” the salesman answers.

“Yes, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol speaks. “There was this girl who sang a song by Taeyeon here, and there was also an orange-headed girl here at that time. Do you think she knows who that girl is?”

“Hmm,” Baekhyun considers what he knows. “If you buy one of these, I can tell you what I know.”

“What?!” Junmyeon is now the one to intervene. “No! You just said you didn’t know! We’re not buying—”

“I’ll take one,” Chanyeol brings his wallet out. “Just test it out and then pack it well.”

“Of course, sir!” Baekhyun throwing a smirk at Junmyeon before heading to the stock room.

“Chanyeol, stop this, okay? We can ask JYP if Suzy can sing with Kyungsoo or anyone else, for that matter. We’ll negotiate, but just stop this!” Junmyeon nags, trying to reason out to Chanyeol whose mind seemed to have synced out.

“Look, hyung, let me ask you a question,” Chanyeol sighs. “Why did you take a video of her in the first place?”

“Because I thought she was good?” Junmyeon responds, quite confused.

“Then why did you show it to me?”

“Again, because she’s so good, I felt like it would be a waste to not tell anyone. I don’t have a lot of musical knowledge, but it doesn’t take one who has a lot to know how emotional she is. She has a lot of pent up emotions she had to let out.”

“And you know how important that is in music,” Chanyeol counters. “This girl sings great, but she does amazing because she feels through the song, and in this industry full of singers who do their jobs solely for profit, we need one who has a voice that wants to be heard.”

Junmyeon pauses, debating whether to let Chanyeol go on with his delusions of finding this girl sometime today or just stop whatever it is.

“Fine,” Junmyeon finally accepts the inevitable. “But if within three days we don’t find her, well stop this.”

“I promise,” Chanyeol nods gratefully. “Thank you, hyung.”

After his purchase, Chanyeol begins to interrogate Baekhyun.

“Now it will help if you show me the actual video,” Baekhyun asks for it, and although he’s reluctant, Junmyeon scrolls through his phone for the clip before handing it to Baekhyun.

“Oh, wait, I knew you were talking about Seulgi,” Baekhyun then points out to the saleslady with the orange hairdo. “She’s the one interviewing the girl.”

“Do you think this Seulgi knows her?” Chanyeol looks hopeful.

“I’m not sure, but let me call a friend who knows Seulgi well,” Baekhyun steps outside the shop for a while and drags in a man wearing a chicken nugget suit.

“Hyung, my manager will kill me if he founds out I’m not there!” Chicken Nugget complains.

“Jongin, this won’t take long,” Baekhyun rewinds the video and lets Jongin see. “Do you know this girl singing? Does Seulgi know her?”

“You mean Y/N?” Jongin squints to check if he’s seeing correctly. “Yeah, that’s Y/N.”

“You know her?!” Chanyeol almost shakes Jongin, feeling the excitement of knowing the girl.

“Yeah, she’s Seulgi’s best friend,” Jongin explains. “But who are you? Why are you looking for her?”

“Seulgi pretended not to know her best friend?” Baekhyun suddenly barges into the conversation.

“Yeah, they do it all the time,” Jongin shrugs. “Business is business, hyung.”

“Anyway,” Chanyeol clears his throat, hoping for an answer. “Do you know Do Kyungsoo?”

“The singer?” Jongin tilts his head. “Who doesn’t?”

“Well, her voice matches Kyungsoo’s a lot,” Chanyeol elucidates. “And if she’d let us, we’d like to have her try to sing.”

“I don’t know about that,” Jongin scratches his head. “But there’s Seulgi. You can go ask her how you can contact Y/N.” And they all turn around to see the same girl on the video walking to the store in her work outfit.

“I’m not late, right?” She heaves before heading to the back of the store. She returns, appropriate enough to work already. “Welcome!”

“Seulgi, they’re asking about Y/N,” Jongin proclaims, wondering how this guy can be so blunt about such a request.

“Y/N? What about her?” Seulgi questions.

“Well, we kind of have a problem she can possibly help with,” Junmyeon rewords whatever had been said before about this deal with the girl.

“I can’t speak for her, so I think you might have to talk to her in person,” Seulgi hesitantly mumbles. “What is this request all about, anyway?”

“Do Kyungsoo’s album,” Chanyeol claims. “We heard her singing, and we think she’s the missing puzzle piece.”

“Oh shit,” Seulgi exclaims and covers her mouth in utter shock, knowing how big of a deal this is. “This is huge!”

“It is,” Chanyeol agrees.

“But…” Seulgi takes a deep breath, not sure if she should be saying anything at all.

“What is it?” Chanyeol encourages her to say something.

“She told me she didn’t want anything to do with music, and helping me out with a song number was kind of pushing it. I’m not sure if she’ll approve at all.” Seulgi regrets being the bearer of such news, especially because the guy looks so optimistic, too.

“Does she have any background with singing?” Chanyeol questions.

“She was in a church choir in high school and minored in music during college. Our professor wondered why she wasn’t majoring in music instead because she’s actually an amazing singer.” Seulgi rambles on about her best friend and her life choices that although she doesn’t quite understand, still supports fully.

“Anyway, if you want to meet Y/N, I asked her to come over later after her shift ends. You might have to wait a few…” Seulgi checks her wristwatch. “Hours. It’s only 2 and she gets off at 4.”

Chanyeol knows that he is already pushing Junmyeon’s patience far off, but he needs to know that he at least tried his best in pleading the girl to cooperate with his plan of salvaging everyone’s careers.

“You can go first, hyung,” Chanyeol tells his manager, who looks exasperated now more than ever. “I’ll wait for her.”

“Chanyeol,” Junmyeon hisses, hoping that even if he had given his approval, Chanyeol would at least consider stopping this.

“No, hyung,” Chanyeol gently responds. “This isn’t just for Kyungsoo, but also for myself. Let me do this.”

And Junmyeon’s face softens, seemingly at lost with everything else by now. What Chanyeol wants, Chanyeol gets.

“Just be careful, alright?” Junmyeon reminds in defeat. “Text me when you’re on your way back. I’ll tell the president you’re busy if he goes looking for you.”

“Thanks, hyung,” Chanyeol pats Junmyeon’s back, expressing his appreciation to his ever-patient manager.

Chanyeol waits on a coffee shop across, which has the perfect view of the people coming over the halls where the gadget shop is situated. He had since taken his notebook out, trying to come up with a poem he can later consider lyrics in the song.

Two hours, and he is already getting irritated with some people disrupting the ambiance of the coffee shop.

He had drunken two Americanos in the first hour, but after shivering because of it, he settled on some fruit juice. Last minute, he decides to buy some for the girl… a little gesture he hopes would give her a boost to agree.

“When will she arrive?” Chanyeol asks himself before gathering his stuff and heading back to the shop, with the mango juice in his hand and his work papers on the other.

He walks towards the entrance… well, right until he saw the female from the video personified and looking all beautiful despite the bags underneath her eyes.

“Seulgi, I’m sorry I’m late! The kids didn’t want to let me go!” Chanyeol feels his alarm go off at the mention of kids, wondering if she were talking about her own children.

“You should really find a job which has to do with your actual expertise, Y/N,” and now, Chanyeol is sure that this is the girl.

Of my dreams.

Shut up, Park Chanyeol.

“Anyway, Y/N, there was someone looking for—oh, there he is. Sir!” Seulgi calls for Chanyeol, and the tall guy shudders at the thought of being embarrassed in front of the girl he had wanted to see ever since he had found out about her.

“Looking for me?” She questions, puzzled. “Hello, sir. What can I help you with?”

“Miss Y/N, I am Park Chanyeol,” You nod, acknowledging his introduction. Chanyeol takes a deep breath, preparing for a surprised response coming from you.

“I want you to sing for us.”

#chanyeol scenario #park chanyeol scenario #pcy scenario #chanyeol fanfic #chanyeol fic #exo fanfic #exo fic #exo scenarios #chanyeol x reader #park chanyeol x reader #chanyeol imagine

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callmearhi · 7 years ago

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indistinct rant undercut because it contains spoiler rwby 0511

first, before the rant start, I was curious about newest rwby episode today and decided to check on tumblr for “spoilers”. Yes I’m the “I don’t care” kind of person regarding spoiler lol. So... I checked tumblr. WHAT DID I FOUND?

*sorry for the bad quality image because I just ss it from the website while watching LOL

THIS..........

what’s the meaning of this?

I read I read I read and all of it were full of audience opinions based on their point of view. No offense instead I love you all.. without all of you I won’t get any good spoiler contents:(

NEXT! I decided to watch on my own! But, I should be RT member again:( I’ve been “don’t care anymore” toward rwby because yeah recent storytelling/plot matter. But I logged in and didn’t expect that I still had the first member LOL

I watched... so this is my point of view.

Basically this was a trap to “kill huntsmen” from Salem. But this season we also have White Fang to conquered the “human world”, Branwen conflict, Cinder ambitions, etc, etc. I won’t rant about all of them, I want to rant about this episode because MY PRECIOUS WEISS IS HURT! why Weiss must be hurt? ;-;

We can see Cinder from the beginning that she always taunting the group (it’s a bunch of kids gdi, it should be easy). When Qrow said “calm”, they all should be calm (because srsly it’s not a fight that they can easily win). BUT.. sadly Jaune provoked because Cinder mentioned that “Salem’s goal is to kill all huntresses/huntsmens” and he was provoked because he remembered Pyrrha deaths and can’t forget that terrible accident, and also Cinder say “killing is easy” is adding the spice more tasty. Like seriously it’s soul that you taken away and you didn’t have mercy or pity? So... Jaune can’t take it and started the fight.

Jaune really need to stay calm and don’t let himself drowning in his emotion like I know how it feels to lost someone precious to you but in the war field you have to be cautious to your enemy! (I think it was because that provoke and taunting Jaune turns into this state of mind) So, because Cinder knows that Jaune cares about the recently Dead Girl Pyrrha she keep provoking Jaune until he remember again the traumatized accident. Yeah, I think what Jaune feels now more like trauma because you can see Jaune “taken aback” expression when Weiss screamed. He was afraid the same accident will be happened again (to Weiss). So he continuously fight because Cinder keep taunting him, from this point onward I think Cinder knows Jaune state of mind.

It’s almost final episode:( Why Ruby can’t doing anything too?:( I know Ruby can’t evade those first two attacks that knocked her down but why?:(

Ruby, THE VERY ONLY ONE PERSON THAT SAW PYRRHA DEATHS IN FRONT OF HER EYES, could be traumatized that the same thing will be happened again to her friends. In this context, will be Jaune, because he FACED Cinder ALONE. SOMEONE LIKE PYRRHA DIED IN CINDER HANDS, LET ALONE YOU JAUNE, WITH YOUR RAGE AND RAMPAGE sobs. So Ruby unconsciously lashed out her silver eyes ray again and saved Jaune from Cinder attack. But sadly she got knocked out by Emerald before her silver eyes fully out. But that really took a toll to Cinder because she felt hurt from that white ray and kneeled down.

So, Ruby passed out. Jaune made use of this opportunity to attack Cinder in kneeling BUT SADLY HE MISSED. WITH THAT CLOSE RANGE BETWEEN CINDER AND JAUNE!! WITH A SWORD! WHY MISSED?! CInder was defenseless and Jaune could pierced more than that LOL. But I applause the animation team for that slomo. I think Cinder saw the attack and evade it. But Jaune, you could always attack her heart or body or anything wider than head. Because head can evade easily ;-;

Cinder fed up with Jaune decided to end the game. Jaune with out of breath lying on the floor got a little chat again with Cinder and you know what? Cinder choose Weiss as her taunt target. AGAIN it’s the taunt. Why you love to hurt someone mental rather than its mortal body Cinder? Sadistic character? Or what?

Yeah, this is the part where EVERYONE MAD ABOUT. WHY IT HAD TO BE WEISS? Everyone said that “Jaune’s old crush” but I think it’s not that. OH COME ON CINDER OBJECTIVE IS RUBY? WHY SHE DIDN’T HURT HER INSTEAD? I know, I was thinking about that too. But Ruby was knocked out and passed out then lying on the floor. From the beginning, we can see that Cinder love toying with someone mental and emotion state. It’s not fun to “play” with her prey if its passed out (she wanted to see “the look” on her prey when they “hurt/dead”). Jaune, beforehand, showed that “terrified look” when Weiss screamed. And among the group, someone that really looked troubled with their opponent was Weiss. AND WEISS WAS DEFENSELESS IN THAT TERRIBLE SCENE. AND that was the chance for Cinder to throw the sword without the prey had the chance to evade it. Why not Yang? Yang is smart and tough she could easily evade it. Nora and Ren? They weren’t solo so their defense is still high they can evade it. Qrow? srsly... So, Weiss is the best choice.

There you could have it. The cliffhanger.

Yes, my rant about this episode basically over. But there are more still bugged me:(

Like Weiss fight:’( Took her long enough to summon the knight:( I think it’s the disbenefit from “casting character” because it takes long to complete their spell, but once complete it’ll be deadly. AND THEN, DO YOU SEE the part where that spring maiden easily disbanded/sliced the knight????????:((((( OH GODD!!

BUT I’M KIND OF RELIEVE THAT CINDER SHOT WAS MISSED!!!!!! It isn’t in lethal position ;^; I don’t think Weiss will die. She won’t die easily. I won’t complain with “Stop with Weiss tragedy/misery”, like I was explained before it’s because the flow of the story that’s why Weiss have to be in that condition:( I don’t want that to happen to her too ofc:(

AND AND 1 MORE!!!! I have this weird conclusion. Could Weiss possibly the winter maiden? Why I’ve been thinking about that? Raven said “Take out the heiress. Don’t bother wasting your power. She’s not worth it.” EVEN SO! Why she talking like that? Like there still Nora and Ren though. She should have been said, “Take out the rest.” Then the spring maiden could teamed up with buffy guy (sorry, forgot their names XD). Well, who knows after this Weiss chance to lash out her secret power :> AND Jacques reason to keep Weiss cages inside manor too. This isn’t properly directly/undirectly explained for what purpose too. Maybe it’s for business. Or maybe because Weiss is special?:( Maybe Jacques cares for Weiss too but wrong treatment:(

Now I know exactly why people been mad about the storytelling:(

Oh 1 more, they’re still kids. They still have unstable mind. Eventho they strong, it just their body. Who knows their mental state? Yeah, they could comfort each other. But, trauma is the lethal enemy in the war field. You can’t fight opponent without getting rid of that first or brave enough to let it all go. Let’s take example from this episode. Ruby and Jaune are the example. Ruby saw the terrible accident in front of her eyes. Jaune lost her precious teammate (I don’t know Jaune pictured Pyrrha what as, because I don’t remember Jaune accepting Pyrrha feelings?).

A story that has a brand new world, brand new rules, brand new environment should have been explained well so audience will not be confused regarding the flow of the story. Take example Avatar, Final Fantasy, etc. You should not be rushed or telling unnecessary content so you will have the space to tell us ALL. Character development, the state of the world, main conflicts, etc. With 1 volume contains 11/12/13 episodes and every episodes are under 20mins, I guess the chance should be grasp wisely. Yeah I know making a 3D story isn’t easy. But, you choose to entertain audience by bringing “RWBY” title to them. Audience were so enthusiast about that too. They support too. So I guess, take the chance wisely please don’t let marketing ego ruin this beautiful concept.

Oh don’t judge me whether I support them or not. I’m telling this because I love RWBY. I even reconsidered many times to buy their merchandises because I am a college student too and haven’t had a part time job yet. And finally decided to spent my money on Weiss 1/8 scale figure, you don’t know my struggling to gather the moneh lul U_U and I was FIRST member many times too (monthly, I can’t afford yearly and I don’t really into RT).

Thank you if you reading this.

#rwby spoilers #rwby 0511 #rwby #rwby rant

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hexalene · 7 years ago

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So I dunno if anyone would like care But the manga does actually have an in canon explaination for Naruto's last minute “healing” abilities and Sasuke's sudden proficiency with the Rinnegan in those final battles. There's also some decent evidence for why the Senju don't have the mokuton and even why Naruto can't use it, though he could have if he wasn't a jinchuuriki. but its a whole thing and I'll probably make the post for me if nothing else. But ANYWAY I started thinking about it with those “Sakura has the Mokuton” posts…which I don't hate/dislike really but I feel like kinda misses a point about Tsunade and Sakura that was half-assedly made (so I don't blame anyone for not seeing it, or disagreeing with me) and would have been made a lot better if Sakura hadn't been so unpopular while the manga was running cause like…shonen jump sucks guys. Like it really sucks. I don't think it's a coincidence that two of the Big Three wiffled around boring fight scenes for eons before farting out an epilogue bathed in bad haircuts and heteronormative/undeveloped “families” before the creators jumped ship to just leave (bleach) or wash his hands of the property (naruto). Honestly. Cause like

Kishimoto once said that jump made him do the chuunin exams, when he'd planned on having Naruto travel around and learn stuff about the world and likely meet ppl and get ready to be a kage…I bet this is why some of the villages are so hinted and developed, cause it's likely the story was gonna GO to these places. But jump wanks hard over TOURNAMENTS and fights and anyway the chuunin exam was p awesome, so…it did work out there. The war arc….not so much. Better people than me have broken down that tho so I'm gonna talk about the thing I wanna talk about which is Tsunade and Sakura. So like…in the fight with Madara, we find out that Hashirama was OP as fuck, and could HEAL WITHOUT HANDSIGNS OMG (Madara like…drools over this srsly) and Tsunade doesn't lol about that, or Madara’s reverence, so it's clear that was like A Big Deal back in the day. And Hashirama is like…the god of god shinobi. That…is one fuckoff huge shadow to live under?? Like how do you top that? He healed, had an amazing “bloodline” ability, went up against all the bijuu like NBD, and ~changed the world~. We never learn about Tsunade's parents and honestly…I think it's because they never crawl out from Hashirama’s shadow…this is a total headcanon admittedly, but I don't think they died early, since that'd likely be a part of her trauma. But anyway. With Madara, Tsunade is like “I couldn't do what my grandfather did, so I made my OWN DAMN WAY.” And whips up the yin seal. And I hate that this came SO LATE into canon and not before because that's a COOL THING?

Like Tsunade couldn't be Hashirama so she became the Greatest Medic of All Time….thats a HELL of a way to break out of Hashirama’s shadow. And like…people will remember Hashirama as a legend but I like to think that Tsunade is more tangible as an idol for people, idk.

She made that yin seal, and I feel like she probably laid the foundation for all modern medical ninjutsu, and probably was a seal master in her own right. I wish we'd gotten more about Tsunade other than her trauma, she's fucking awesome?? The only actual Sannin, let's be real cause orochimaru is a shit and Jiraiya is a dumpster fire. But this whole shindig is supposedly about Sakura, cause I had a point about her and her character:

Sakura is like The Official Normal on the team who is always worried about being in Naruto and Sasuke's shadows and can't catch up and like…every time she's like “watch me guys I got this, I've caught up” *proceeds to fail and need help*

I was always like “IF YOU HAVE TO SAY IT THEN YOU HAVENT OKAY?? STOP WORRYING AND FIND YOUR OWN THING AND BE YOUR OWN PERSON”

Team 7 like Failed dude…I love the cute genin days but it was a failure and of all of them Sakura clings the fuck out of those days and like Never moves on (I don't think Naruto—still hated by the village and scared of rejection and ignorant about everything and living alone in a shitty apartment—or Sasuke—stewing in the hatred and lies from his brother and working for a kage who ORDERED THE MASSACRE OF HIS FAMILY….i mean even Kakashi, guilty about everything and unfulfilled and depressed...yeah they may have some fond memories but they probably aren't scrambling to go back, you know?) I legit believe her Sasuke obsession is in no small part fueled by a desire to go back to idyllic childhood days where the world wasn't complicated and the future looked bright…Sakura FLAT OUT says this in her last “”””confession””””” to Sasuke before the VOTE2 fight.

She's like those people who peaked in high school and never stop telling you how they were prom queen once and god Kaytlyyn I get it prom was a thing that mattered to you. It's why she acts so childish around Sasuke and why they'll never be a real couple She just Devolves back to being a 13 year old again and tbh I ship SNS hardcore but I DO THINK Sasuke could have loved her if she'd actually let herself grow up and act like a grown woman around him…a poke is not better than a kiss holy fuck. I CRINGE my asshole inside out whenever I see that panel where Sasuke denies her the kiss but TBH??? I would too?? If this THIRTY YEAR OLD WOMAN comes up and “tee hee”s and stares up her lashes and points her toes in like a little girl?? And then doesn't like…communicate?

THE issue that started Gaiden? SO GLAD THE SS FAMILY GOT THAT FIGURED OUT

Nor does she go for a kiss goodbye on the cheek? Or a hug? Or SAY anything? Or give him a return date to come back or we need to rethink this if only for our emotionally needy daughter? Like a Sane Person in an adult relationship?? Some wife?? She should be able to do these basic ass things without acting like a preteen?? Seriously y'all go find a thirty something year old woman and picture them acting like Sakura did in that scene…so infantilizing. I wouldn't kiss her either, damn. And we see like no sign she acts any other way with him. SASUKE DOESNT KNOW HER. And because Sakura can't act like an adult with him, she's never gotten to really know him either??? So infuriating but this isn't supposed to be anti-SS, and I mean it cause I DO THINK Sakura was supposed to do something in this story and didn't cause we needed new genin for child soldiering. I THINK SAKURA COULD HAVE ENDED THE CHILD SOLDIER PRACTICE. We see in her shinden novel that she and Ino are establishing clinics for kids and orphans and like…assessing their mental health, and then we hear like nothing of that but that might have been her revolutionary idea outside of Naruto and Sasuke's shadow cause she does it cause she sees how fucked in the head her teammates are and she had a healthy childhood and look what that did for her. DUDE she deals with SAI her best friend can walk into people's MINDS whyyyyyy???? did Sakura not get to revolutionize medicine again with mental health care?? Helping shinobi cope with trauma, proving that neglect, abandonment, trauma and war is ruining kids and contributing to the cycles of violence?? Tsunade learned to fix bodies and Sakura mastered that so why not let her discover how to help people fix their minds…and change the system that way. Look I get that this is speculation and headcanon, but it feels like that's the groundwork tentatively laid? Sakura growing up and leaving her idyllic childhood behind and changing the system with her more balanced and objective view on things since SHE had a normal childhood (in context, okay) Anyway I could spiral into like 10 different rants from this and I probably will at some point but whatever Hey tumblr I'm hexalene I'm late to the fandom and I have a lot of useless opinions

#Naruto #anti ending #sakura haruno #Tsunade #and fine #it's a bit #anti sasusaku #anti boruto #ppl may disagree but I think this is pro Sakura #rant

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australet789 · 8 years ago

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Fractal

Omg I’m sorry for taking so long to update. Classes started, it’s dificult to focus and I srsly didnt think this chapter was goign to end up being so long. But alas. I hope you all enjoy it!

a little warning: I wrote a little detailed description of food being eaten so if you are uncomfortable with it, you can skip it, it was mostly for laughs than anything.

Thanks to @lunalocura for being an amazing beta!

Summary: Chaos, besides its own natures, has a little order on it. Chaos, without order, leads to destruction itself. When the object holding the chaos of the world is damaged, maybe a little more than order is going to be needed to fix it. Abomination! AU

AO3

Chapter 4

When Ladybug dropped her transformation inside her room, it felt like as if another weight had been added to her shoulders. Eyes closed and fist clenched, she could feel the worried looks Tikki sent her, waiting patiently for her to speak, which didn’t help to diminish the bitter sensation in the pit of her stomach.

Too many questions were forming inside her head, bubbling, boiling, twisting her thoughts and making her imagination run wild, with so many different scenarios and so many ‘hows’ and ‘whys’.

Questions that didn’t stop when she comforted Maya after cleaning the akuma and made her brother apologize to her, who hugged the little girl with tears in his eyes, promise after promise leaving the mouth of the teenage boy.

Questions that continued forming when she, as Marinette, forced a smile to the kids and the clearly angry-and apologetic- Ms. Chamack when they said goodbye to her and her mother, who noticed Marinette’s strange behavior and asked if everything was alright.

Questions that only increased when she left her house once again as her alter ego and searched and searched, cold air hitting her face, the smell of winter starting to cover the streets of Paris, the sound of people going on with their lives like they had learned to do after the first akuma attacks.

Questions that came along with a pair of green eyes that belonged to the person she was looking for.

A pair of green eyes that were sad, confused and scared.

A pair of green eyes that were hurting.

And it was all her fault.

“It’s not your fault, Marinette.” Tikki reassured to her holder. Apparently she had said it out loud. “You couldn’t have noticed tha-“

“But I should have, Tikki.” Marinette hissed with a hoarse voice.

“He didn’t tell you anything. You couldn’t had known.” The kwami said calmly.

“He tried.” Marinette then remembered his hesitation to break the hug, the fear in his voice that she confused with embarrassment. “He tried and I misinterpreted his intentions. I should had paid more attention. But I was so focused in the akuma…”

“You were just doing your job.” Tikki tried again to convince the designer.

“…and so excited for saving Adrien and all the things he said to me,” Marinette continued, not hearing what her kwami said or pretending to not to, “that I failed to notice what Chat was trying to tell me. That he needed my help.”

‘How many times have I done the same? How many times I dismissed Chat’s behavior believing it was something “Chat-like”?’

“Adrien is your friend and he was in danger. It’s perfectly normal that you wanted to help him first. You did the right thing, Marinette.”

Marinette stayed silent for a moment. Walking towards her desk, she extended her hand and grabbed a photo that she kept in one side of her computer’s screen: a cute selfie of her- Ladybug- and Chat Noir that he had managed to take with his baton the day of their “Six Month Meeting Anniversary”: a warm afternoon running around rooftops and challenging each other until, exhausted and giggling, they decided to take a rest on the Jardin des Tuileries. The light was so pretty that day and the atmosphere so calm that she couldn’t stop herself and suggested he to take a picture. And of course, her overexcited kitty took the chance and asked her for one with her instead.

“I’m happy that Adrien is ok, Tikki. I am. But the thing is: I know that Adrien is going to be alright and where I can find him…but with Chat, I don’t.” Marinette finally said, her fingers tracing softly the contour of her partner’s face.

“Chat is my friend and my partner, Tikki. He had always noticed when I felt down and be there for me, knowing exactly what to say to make me feel good again.” She blinked quickly, trying to stop the tears that were forming in her eyes. “And instead of being a good partner and being a comfort to him, I only scared him away!” Marinette shouted, the frustration she had been feeling since Chat ran away from her like she had been Hawkmoth in person finally left her body. “A-and I just stayed there and didn’t move as if I haven’t seen things like that every day since I became a superhero! And that d-damn cat was so damn f-fast and he didn’t let me explain or ask anything! He even turned off his baton so I couldn’t track him down! Ugh! ”

With a groan, she let herself fall over her chair, face hidden behind her hands.

‘Why did he have to be so damn stubborn?’

The same questions kept repeating over and over in her head. She couldn’t understand why Chat didn’t want to tell her about, well, that (even if it was less than 10 seconds, she saw enough of Chat’s face before he bolted). How long had he been like that? Why was he like that? Was it his ring? Was it because of Twinkle Twister’s or Shockwave’s attack? Did he really think that she wouldn’t notice? That he could have solved it by himself like with Copycat? Didn’t he realize that that only made her more worried about him? They were a team, for God’s sake, she wouldn’t have pushed him away!

And most importantly…

“Why didn’t the Miraculous Cure do its work?”

The question resonated between the walls of her room and lost itself within the murmurs coming from downstairs where her parents were probably watching TV. She felt Tikki flying slowly towards her and landing over her shoulder. Her kwami sighed.

“I’m…I’m not sure.” She confessed, her voice lacking its usual cheerful tone.

Marinette turned her head slightly. She watched with concern how the normally happy kwami showed a worried expression on her face, her antenna were down and her brows, deeply furrowed. Marinette knew that expression, she has seen Tikki do that before, which only increased Marinette’s fears.

“Tikki,” Marinette licked her lips, not ready for the answers she was going to get, “has…has this happened before?”

The little god sent her a quick glance and sighed again. Marinette’s anxiety increased at this, her fingers playing with the photo still in her hands.

“Yes.”

Marinette caught her breathe.

‘It’s ok, don’t freak out, Marinette,’ she told to herself. ‘At least,’ she thought, ‘we can know the reason behind Chat’s transformation.’

Especially if her partner wasn’t willing to talk.

Which lead to her next question.

“Ok, so that means that there’s a way to help Chat, right? We just need to do what the previous Ladybug did and problem solved! ” A shadow darkened her kwami’s eyes. “Tikki…?”

“What happened last time was very similar, yes, but it’s not the same. I can’t promise you that we will succeed, Marinette.”

“But…but you just said…”

“I know, Marinette. I know you are worried but please, you need to hear me out first.” Tikki pleaded.

Marinette nodded quietly. When Tikki noticed the expectant look of her holder, she began to explain:

“For once, I don’t know exactly why this…kind of transformation happens. I guess it’s because Plagg’s magic is affected or the ring is damaged. When it happened my holder wasn’t…s-she was d-d…” Marinette didn’t need an explanation about it. She could see the sadness in the little god’s eyes. She didn’t push her and waited for her to continue. “I wasn’t active at the time. I know they tried to activate me several times, because what happened to that Chat Noir was affecting other people too, but…they never could.” Marinette suspected “they” were the previous Chat Noir and his kwami. “When they found a new holder, she performed the cure and it fixed the problem.”

“I know what you are going to say,” Tikki interrupted herself before Marinette could even open her mouth, “but my guess about why it worked then…it only worked because… because the previous Chat was too weak…so our magic focused on fixing the Cat Miraculous first but for Chat Noir…it was too late for him.”

Marinette felt like she had been hit in the chest. That meant…that the only way to help Chat…was to let him…he needed to…

The photograph in her hands slid through her fingers and felt into the floor, the frozen picture of two smiling teenagers, a distant memory of what it had been a happy time.

A time they would never have again.

Marinette squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. No, she wasn’t going to give up yet, they were Ladybug and Chat Noir, they were in this together.

There must be another way.

“What about that old man that cured you? He helped you, doesn’t it? Can he help Chat too and his kwami? Plagg you said?”

“He only cured me because I wasn’t able to let you transform and use your power.” Tikki explained. “The Miraculous Cure is the most powerful way to heal somebody. While it depends on the amount of energy I have, even in my worst moment, my power is stronger than his.”

“And Chat’s kwami never told you about what happened?” Marinette asked with desperation in her voice.

Tikki shook her head. “He usually changed the subject when I tried to speak about it.”

Marinette let out a whimper and covered her head with her hands. She was getting out of ideas and time was against them.

Wait.

Time.

“Tikki, how much time passed before finding a new Ladybug?” Marinette suddenly asked, an idea forming in her head.

The kwami thought for a moment before giving an answer. “Almost 4 years, why?”

Marinette straightened herself up, barely containing her excitement. “Then we have time! I can do what the second Ladybug did and save Chat before he d-“She paused and reconsidered her words. “B-before something b-bad happens! I just need to convince him to let me talk to him so you can talk to his kwami and know where the damage is so we can focus the Cure to that point and fix everything! We can help him! We can do it this time, Tikki!”

Picking up the photo and unaware of the warm, but sad smile on the tiny god’s face, Marinette looked at it once more, her hopes rising the more she thought about her plan.

‘Everything will be alright, kitty. I won’t let you go, I promise.’

‘I need to see your smile again.’

It wasn’t the first time Adrien slept with his transformation on.

To give him credit, he didn’t do it on purpose that first time. That particular akuma wasn’t a strong one, but it was a sneaky one and Ladybug and he spent too much time trying to catch him and when they did, it was already past 11 o’clock.

Thank everything above that that day his father wasn’t home. He also discovered that Nathalie was the one who checked on him exactly at midnight.

The suit itself wasn’t uncomfortable (it had to be comfortable enough to allow him to perform those acrobatics movements during fights and patrols, and let him stay in the suit as long as he didn’t use his Cataclysm or he wanted to detransform) but it wasn’t like sleeping in the softest cotton pajamas either. But those few times he slept in his suit, detrasforming always felt like a breath of fresh air over his skin. He missed the confidence and sensation of freedom the magic gave to him, but he also missed being able to feel things again with his bare hands.

Something that, because of his current transformation, he wasn’t sure he was going to be able to do again.

Adrien let out a big sigh. Hiding his face in his pillow, he tried to fall asleep again, but his mind refused to cooperate. Flashes from the events of the previous day began to appear in his head: His conversation with his father. Plagg melting. The big cartoonish akuma dragon. His conversation with Ladybug after being rescued by her (he smiled a little at this). Him transforming and becoming…whatever he currently was. The battle with the akuma. Him trying to hide from Ladybug and being found by her…

Ladybug’s shocked face.

He clutched his other pillow towards his body trying to find some comfort in it. He had wished that everything was only just a bad dream. That everything would be alright, that he would enjoy his free days talking with his friends, inviting them to his house, eating snacks and telling each other ridiculous stories of childhood. They would have had fun, they would have laughed and cried and laughed again.

He should have been happy these days. But here he was. Trapped. Again.

And he couldn’t blame his father on this this time.

It wasn’t fair.

‘CLANK!’

Making a sound like a strangled scream, Adrien jumped out of his bed and landed on all fours, startled and completely awake.

“What th-”

Two things he noticed in that moment: one, although a little scratchy, his voice sounded completely normal (for which he was really relieved) and two, that one of his trophies was on the floor.

Turning his head up to the shelf he used to keep them, he saw that the second level shelf, where his fencing trophy was supposed to be, was empty.

“So you where the responsible of my second roughest wake up ever, huh?” Relaxing himself, he approached the shiny object that lied still and picked it up…

“How did you manage to fall down…?”

…only to see his reflection looking at him.

“Right.”

Gently, he returned the old prize to its place, pushing it a little more into the shelf to prevent more surprises, his hand lingering for a moment at the distorted image that looked back at him.

He sighed.

What was he going to do now? He couldn’t go to school in this…state. He needed an excuse to justify his absence. He could ask Nathalie, but then she would probably ask why he wasn’t attending school and he would need to invent another excuse for it.

And if his father found out…

Shaking his head, Adrien sat down on his bed and tried to think. He could use his father’s fashion show in his favor, saying that, in the end, his father made him help with it. It would make his father look bad, but he didn’t have many options to use for believable excuses. He could also message Nino to tell Ms. Bustier about it. That way his friends wouldn’t worry about him: they already knew how his father was. It pained to him to lie like that, but this way he could take care of his problem without involving other people.

There was still the little detail of how to convince Nathalie and his father that he wasn’t going to go anywhere (that they need to know) or invite anyone to his house. But he wanted to be optimistic and hope that the problem would be solved quickly.

The how, well, he still was working on it.

“If I only knew where to start looking for…” he mumbled.

‘You can always ask Ladybug about it,’ something in the back of his mind told him, but he quickly dismissed that thought. He wasn’t going to involve her into this. He had already turn off his baton to prevent being found out. He only needed to stay out of sight, or be sneaky enough to avoid being caught on camera if he wanted to get out of his house for a couple of minutes.

‘But you can’t hide forever.’

He sighed again and ran his hand through his hair. He should have asked Plagg for more information about the miraculous. But he always was so cryptic about the subject and, truth to be told, Adrien preferred to be transformed and enjoy the freedom the suit provided, which decreased the amount of time he had with his kwami.

What a pair the both of them made.

But if Adrien was going to be a disaster, he was glad that he could have Plagg at his side and be a disaster together.

He already missed his cheese-eating partner.

At the thought of food, his stomach made an embarrassing growl.

Adrien realized he hadn’t had the chance to eat anything since the day before. The akuma and his sudden transformation left him too tired to even think of eating and he probably fell asleep at some point during the night. How many hours he slept, he didn’t know.

He walked towards his desk and noticed that his phone was there.

‘Oh thank God it’s still here.’ Adrien grabbed it and went to load its battery. ‘It was a good thing I rushed to fight the akuma and forgot about it. It would have been lost with the transformation instead.’

He waited enough to let his phone get at least 1% of battery before turning it on to check the hour and his messages.

It was almost midday.

“Wow, it has been a long time since I slept this much…”

He decided to read his messages then. The most recent message was from Alya.

‘Huh, that’s weird. She hasn’t text me personally in forever’

Curiously, he opened it:

“Hey, bro, Nino here. My phone was confiscated so I’m talking using Alya’s phone. Just to check if you are ok. If she knows I borrowed it without her cons- crap, she noticed. Bye, dude, message back!”

Adrien allowed himself to laugh at the imaginary picture in front of him: Alya chasing his friend because of a phone. Nino would be totally screwed if something happened to it, so Adrien understood the urgency of not being discovered.

He had two missed calls and several messages from him too. One of them was a threat to Adrien’s father: “he better let you out of that prison you call home, bro. Or else.” Adrien chuckled at his best friend’s antics. He knew that Nino was never serious with those comments and was just concerned. He hoped that one day Nino and his father could be on better terms though.

He also had two messages from Marinette, one asking if he was well and the other that said that if he wasn’t in the mood to do their nightly chats, she would understand. Adrien felt a sting in his heart. His and Marinette’s friendship was very recent but he already considered their interactions something very precious. She usually was very sweet and gentle but she had a very sassy and snarky side he was glad he was being able to know. So seeing her worrying about him filled his chest with warmth but also sadness because he never answered her and she was probably disappointed with him. He needed to make it up her somehow. He could message her later explaining himself.

The last message was from Nathalie, probably before she and his father boarded the plane, reminding him about the rules he needed to follow when his father was out and that if he had any questions he was to ask her. The message ended with Nathalie sending her and his father’s goodbyes.

Once he finished, he checked the hour again and noticed it was just a little past midday. His friends would probably be in lunch-break so he could send them a message telling them he was with his father in New York and to forgive him for not being able to talk sooner. But first, he needed to eat something too.

He considered his options. He obviously couldn’t go out and buy something, so his only option was to stay inside and eat what their chef had made for him. Giuseppe was a good and very patient man, never asking about Adrien’s requests for stacks of cheese Camembert during the week. He was also very capable in his job, punctuality being his signature: breakfast and lunch were done an hour before being served and then he waited until he or his father ordered for the food to be brought to the table.

Adrien imagined that Giuseppe was waiting for him, so if he wanted to eat, he needed to stay hide, grab something from his refrigerator and come back to his room without being spotted. Since maybe one or two people from their staff, apart from Giuseppe, were still in the mansion, he wouldn’t have troubles reaching the kitchen. Still, he needed to be careful.

Taking advantage of his transformation and cat-like reflexes, he quickly arrived. He double checked that no one was close and then he stepped into the kitchen.

He wasn’t prepared for the variety of smells that hit him.

Usually, when he was transformed, his senses were more sensitive than when he was in his civilian form, which helped during the fights.

But apparently, his new transformation increased that sensitivity, which caused Adrien to perceive every single smell in the room.

And everything smelled so good.

Battling against his desire to pick up the whole kitchen, he decided to make himself a quick sandwich with ham and cheese. When Plagg asked once what kind of dishes with cheese existed, Adrien made him that one (which was the only one he was able to cook without causing a disaster). With resignation, the kwami admitted that the sandwich was good but nothing like his precious Camembert. The sandwich needed to be grilled and it was accompanied by a fried egg but Adrien wasn’t sure about how much time he had before someone discovered him so he decided skip those steps.

He took out a dish and quickly cut off two slices bread, trying not to focus on the way the bread crunched under the knife or the smell that came from it when he opened it. He shook his head and then approached the refrigerator to finish the sandwich.

But when he opened the doors to get the rest of the ingredients, his body betrayed him and a he let out a big yawn.

Which caused him to inhale all the smells that came from the food inside of it.

Adrien had totally forgot about that today was the day Giuseppe filled the fridge. That explained why he perceived all those smells when he entered the kitchen. But that also meant that today was the day that everything was renewed.

And everything included kwami food.

In front of Adrien, laid the biggest wheel of Camembert.

A little line of drool began to come from the corner of his mouth.

He knew this had to be Plagg’s fault. Adrien didn’t dislike Camembert per se, but he was tired of its smell since he had to carry it everywhere.

But right now, it looked like the best food in the world.

And it was right there.

And no one was around.

Adrien forced himself to turn around and step away from the refrigerator, holding his breath.

One step.

Two steps.

Three steps…

…And then he pounced right into the refrigerator.

He practically buried his face in the cheese. His new teeth were a little bit uncomfortable, but they allowed him to take bigger bites. He could taste the strong and salty flavor of the Camembert on his tongue, matching the also strong smell that tempted him seconds ago, the semi-creamy substance coating his mouth and claws while he devoured the food. In that moment, Adrien didn’t care about the mess he probably was making.

“Signorino Adrien, is that you? Scusami for not being here, I had to answer a phone call from mia fillia, but if you are ready I can serve you your fo…”

Adrien stopped abruptly and slowly raised up is head, cheese still dripping from his big green teeth. Giuseppe’s eyes were open wide as well as his mouth, not a single sound coming from it. Adrien gulped the rest of cheese the he had in his mouth while feeling a wave of panic running through his body.

“H-hey, Giuseppe…” Adrien began saying while trying to give the chef the best of his smiles.

But before Adrien could explain himself, the old man’s eyes rolled up his head and the chef collapsed over the floor.

Adrien quickly approached the chef, worried about him being hurt, but when he noticed that Giuseppe had just fainted, he let out a breath of relief. He carried the man, careful to not scratch him with his claws, putting him in a chair next to the table and positioned him in a way it looked like Giuseppe had just fallen sleep. That way, the chef would probably believe he was just dreaming.

Adrien murmured a soft ‘sorry’ before returning to his room. He went to his bathroom and washed his hands and face, trying to clean all the cheese off himself. When he looked up to the mirror, he couldn’t stop himself from flinching at the sight of his own reflection.

The same reflection that scared Giuseppe so much he had fainted because of it.

The same reflection Ladybug saw the day before.

A suffocating sensation began to form inside his chest. He couldn’t stay in his house. At least not for now. He needed fresh air and to clear his mind about what was happening. That he really couldn’t be seen because what happened with Giuseppe was going to be everyone’s reaction. Shock. Disgust. Fear.

Adrien leaped through his window towards the rooftops.

And then he began to run.

He knew he was being careless to going out just like that, that Ladybug would probably scold him if she knew what he was doing, but he also knew that as Chat Noir, he was really fast and civilians would only see a black blur jumping above them. He also knew those rooftops like the back of his hand, so he had some shortcuts he could use to hide.

The cold air filled his lungs and relaxed his mind, his thoughts going everywhere and nowhere while he let his muscle memory act by itself. He liked to think that maybe, if he keep running and accelerating, he would be able to leave all his problems behind.

But reality was always a force that restrained him.

Adrien perked up his ears at the sound of laughs he knew very well.

His curiosity was stronger and he slowed his movements, following with his gaze the source of the laughs. Looking down, he saw Alya, Marinette and Nino coming in his way.

As Adrien suspected, they were in lunch-break.

“Dude, I can’t believe you couldn’t solve exercise 8. That was the easiest one.”

“I’m sorry, but not everyone can’t be a genius on physics.”

“Mari, the answer was supposed to be in milliliters. You ended up with centimeters.”

“Shut up, Alya.”

Adrien watched how the three of them laughed and teased at each other. He felt bad for Marinette for being the target of Alya and Nino, but he chuckled when she stuck her tongue out like a little child to them. How much he wished to be there with them.

Adrien frowned, his smile replaced for a thin line. He could have been there with them, making jokes and laughing until his stomach hurt if it wasn’t for this.

But he couldn’t be there. He couldn’t be with his friends, he couldn’t talk to them and telling them the truth no matter how much he wanted because he would only scare them away.

They would never know how much he was suffering. They would continue with their lives and believe the lies he would tell to them, because they were easier to believe. Because pretending that everything was okay was the first thing his parents taught to him. Because pretending had been all his life.

That wasn’t fair.

He was tired of pretending.

He only wanted to have fun.

He only wanted to be a kid.

It. Wasn’t. FAIR.

CRASH!

“Oh my God! Marinette, are you ok?!”

“Dude, that was close!”

Adrien woke up of his thoughts and rushed to the edge of the rooftop to see what had happened: a big flowerpot was utterly crashed at Marinette’s feet, some of the dirt covered her clothes and part of her face.

One more step and the pot would have fallen over her head.

Adrien watched the scene in horror, but it increased when he distinguished little black spots coming from the broken pieces covering the street.

Black spots like the ones from his Cataclysm.

‘No. No, that couldn’t be. I must be seeing things. I wouldn’t do-‘

But when he looked at his hands, he clearly saw the magic spots twisting over them, his destructive power spreading over the rooftop and crawling down the edge of it.

Adrien shook his head repeatedly, tears forming in the corner of his eyes.

When Adrien looked down again his eyes briefly made contact with Marinette’s, her eyes widening when she recognized him.

“Y-yeah, it’s ok. I’m f-fine, guys.”

He quickly turned around and jumped away, trying to get far away from everyone, his heart beating hard against his chest.

He had done it.

It was his fault.

He almost hurt someone he cared about.

He almost hurt Marinette.

He was a monster.

Marinette knew she only had one chance.

She wasn’t sure why he was out or why he was near them but she didn’t have the time to spend questioning his actions. She had a mission and she wasn’t going to let it slip out of her fingers again.

She quickly dismissed Alya and Nino, assuring them that she was fine and that she was going to go straight to her house instead of the café like they had agreed to when they left school. She probably sounded a little bit anxious, but they would assume it was because of the flowerpot incident.

A few goodbyes later, when she was sure her friends wouldn’t see her, she fled into the closest alley and promptly transformed into her spotted self.

Ladybug rushed through the rooftops in the direction she saw Chat run away. He was faster now so she was using all the force her legs could provide to give him chase. Her yo-yo was her right hand, ready to catch him if she needed to. She could have used her Lucky Charm to track him faster, but she wanted to talk to him and explain her plan and she wasn’t going to do it if she only had 5 minutes.

Her senses were at maximum, focusing on looking at any sign of Chat. If she dared to let herself be distracted for one second, she was going to lose him again. She didn’t know how he was dealing with his transformation. The way he had sprinted away the roof only increased her worries. At first she thought that he was just passing near them when the pot fell and that he had seen the whole thing. That would explain the shocked face he had when she looked over the roof and noticed him. But now that the think about it, there was another feeling behind his eyes apart of fear.

Guilt.

But that didn’t make sense. Why Chat would feel guilty? It wasn’t like he had been the one who pushed the pot towards her…

Was he?

Suddenly, she caught a glimpse of a black blur by the corner of her eyes.

‘Gotcha.’

Ladybug didn’t think it twice and with perfect aim, she threw her yo-yo towards her sneaky chaton.

The string wrapped around his legs the exact moment he was jumping over a chimney, making him abruptly stop midair. A ‘yelp’ came from his mouth when he face planted. Before he even had the chance to react or untangle himself, Marinette took initiative and jumped around the chimney pots, making the string of her yo-yo wrap around them too. She landed in front of Chat Noir and then she pulled the string of her weapon with all her strength, the action lifting him by his legs and making him hang upside-down, this time with a groan coming from the deep in his throat.

For a couple of seconds, none of them said anything.

If it wasn’t for the fact that the situation was, literally, a matter of life and death, Ladybug would have laughed at the ridiculousness of their position.

She wanted to cry, actually, but she needed to stick with her plan.

She took a deep breathe.

“Look, Chat. I need to t-“

“D-don’t! Please, let-t me go, you n-need to s-stay away from me!”

Okay, she was expecting something like ‘don’t look at me’ instead but she was prepared for this.

She was also glad that his voice was still the same, though.

“Chat, it’s ok. I’m not scared of you.” String still on her hand, she approached her partner. “I’m sorry if I made you think I was. But I have talked with my kwami about what happened to you and she told me that there’s a way to cure you…”

“Please, my Lady, you don’t understand…” Chat pleaded once more while trying to untie himself and half covering his face with one arm.

“…but she needs to talk to your kwami first since he knows what happened the last time this occurred.” Marinette continued. “I know this would mean that we need to detrasform in the same place but I have already thought about it and we don’t need to reveal ourselves if we stay back to back or keep our eyes closed the whole time. We could also use that spot in the Eiffel Tower we usually use as a stop from patrols…

“Ladybug, I can’t…“

“Look I don’t really know what you are going through,” she admitted, “but I want you to know that I’m here for you. I’m going to do anything to help you. It wasn’t your fault that this happened…”

“BUT IT IS MY FAULT!” Chat finally shouted, uncovering his face, rage filling his eyes.

None of them was prepared for what happened next.

From Chat’s hands, a vortex of what seemed to be bad luck escaped in Ladybug’s direction, the magic wrapping around the hand that was holding the string of the yo-yo. Ladybug’s eyes widened at this and she shook her hand trying to liberate it from the magic. But instead of feeling pain, she felt a tickling sensation in the palm of her hand. The tickles were strong enough to make her release the string, which caused Chat to fall to the ground with a ‘thud’.

“What the…” Ladybug began saying, looking curiously at her hand when the magic dissipated.

“No. NonononoNoNO. NO!” Chat sputtered in desperation. He kicked out of the yo-yo’s string and franticly leaped towards her. “Please not her too, please, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean it, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry...”

“Chat! Chat, calm down.” Ladybug tried to reassure her visibly shaken partner. “I’m okay, it didn’t do anything, it just tickled me and I was surprised, that’s all.” She extended her hand to Chat, showing him that it was completely ok. She let him grab her wrist and he gently turned it around, noting that, in fact, there wasn’t any damage.

Chat let out a sigh in relief. Ladybug felt him relax and she directed a soft smile to her partner. No matter the appearances, he was still her dorky and protective kitty.

But Chat’s smiles dropped and releasing Ladybug’s hand, he recoiled and sunk into himself once more.

She walked near him once more, trying to make him feel comfortable in her presence. She didn’t want to scare him again.

“Chat…?”

Ladybug heard him mumbling something before he spoke, but she only could get the words “trophy” and what it seemed to be like an Italian name.

“My bad luck. Something is happening to my powers and my bad luck is leaking.” He explained. “I have tried to control it but I think it reacts to my emotions and I have tried to control them too but…but, I think it’s not enough.”

Ladybug looked at him and noticed how sad his expression was.

“I mean, I expected to something like this would happen, you know. It’s obvious that not only my exterior would change. The suit is part of the magic of the miraculous, if that got affected that means that the whole magic had been affected too.

But I guess, I was hoping that I was the exception to that case. That my powers wouldn’t end up hurting the people I care about.”

She didn’t know what to say. She wanted to comfort her partner, find a way to make him feel better, to assure him that everything will be alright…but now that she knew about the leaking…she wasn’t sure anymore. Still, she needed to try.

When it seemed that Chat would not say anything else, Ladybug decided to ask about something he said before that had been bugging her (pun was totally NOT intended).

“Chat, when your bad luck attacked me…” Marinette wanted to slap herself when she realized what her words implied. ‘Sure, Marinette, that’s a good way to comfort him’. It didn’t make her feel better how Chat winced at them. “Ok, bad choice of words.”

“It’s ok, I get it. Go on.”

“Right. When that happened,” she said instead, “you said ‘not her too’, like the same had occurred before.” Chat hugged himself and avoided eye contact. “Who were you talking about?”

Ladybug didn’t pressure him to talk. If her suspicions were correct, this was going a painful thing for him to remember. And also, for her.

“I…I…” Chat stammered. “It was…I didn’t mean…I was j-just passing by the rooftops and I h-heard them laugh and had f-fun. I didn’t know there was a flower pot and it f-fell so close to her I…” With the back of his hand, he wiped a few tears that had escaped him. “A-and I…I only wanted to be there too. I only wished to feel less lonely. To have their happiness.” He scoffed. “But I guess I did more than wish, eh, Bug? I almost hurt my friend Marinette because I couldn’t control my own selfish feelings.”

Marinette tensed at this. Chat considered her civilian self a friend? But they had only met a couple of times.

Unless…

Unless he knew her in his civilian form?

That would make things even more complicated than they already were.

She could think about that later. Right now, Chat needed her.

“Chat, listen. I know you don’t believe me but I will say it again and again until you do: it wasn’t your fault.”

“Bu-“

“Stop.” Ladybug interrupted him. “You never meant to hurt anybody, didn’t you? It was just an accident. You didn’t even know there was something that could fall and harm anyone. This,” she said pointing at him and her yoyo, “is not your fault. You have a problem and we can fix it. We just need you to detransform and…”

But Chat shook his head in negation.

“My Lady, I already tried to tell you. I can’t…”

“I can’t detransform.”

For the second time that day, Marinette felt a pain in her chest, Tikki’s warning hunting her thoughts.

‘I can’t promise that we will succeed, Marinette.’

“But why…?”

“I don’t know either. It’s too painful to try. I mean the first time it happened I fainted because of the pain so…”

‘…for Chat Noir…it was too late for him.’

“There…there must be another way.” Ladybug muttered, her brain trying to come with a new idea.

Chat Noir straightened himself up and slowly walked past her, arms crossed over his chest, still refusing to look at her directly.

“I appreciate the help, My Lady, but this is my problem now. I will find a way to fix it without hurting anyone else. I promise I will contact you once I solve this. Until then,” he said with defeat in his voice, “I think it’s better if I…disappear, for a while.”

Ladybug glared at him, shocked.

“W-what are you telling me?” She asked, not wanted to believe what he had just said to her.

“It’s for the best, Ladybug.”

“No, it’s not! Chat, you can’t just go away like that!” She yelled at him “What if an akuma attack happens? I can’t fight without you!”

“Of course you can.” He objected. “I have seen the videos, you can do very well without me.”

“Doesn’t mean I like to fight alone, Chat.” She snapped.

“Hmmm…” was his only answer.

Ladybug began to lose her patience.

“Why are you acting like this? We can solve this together, Chat. We are a team! We just need time to think something about and...”

He let out a bitter laugh.

“Time? I think it would need a lot of time to fix this, Bug. How much time until I actually hurt somebody? How much time until I’m discovered by my family? My friends? The whole of Paris?”

“Chat…”

“Besides, you can’t keep your transformation up for too many hours. No matter how much I want to spend time with you, someone will notice you or that your civilian self is gone.”

Damn, he was right about that.

“And what about you?” she asked back.

He lowered his sight at the question, ears dropping flat against his head.

‘Oh, no. Chat...’

The whole loneliness thing made more sense now.

How much didn’t she know about her partner?

Her face must had been reflecting her thoughts because he promptly forced a smile.

“I am fine, Ladybug. Nothing I haven’t deal with before.”

‘But you are not fine. And I won’t be sure if you will do something reckless if I don’t know where you are.’

A moment of silent settled between the two and a soft but cold breeze dared to brush both heroes’ hair.

An airplane passed by.

Chat looked up to the sky and watched it go.

“I think we have been here for too long. You will probably have something to do.”

She woke up of her own thoughts at the sound of Chat’s voice.

‘C’mon, Marinette, do something he is going to leave again!’

“Uhm…” He scratched the back of his neck. “I guess…uhm…this is my cue to go.” He cleared his throat. “Don’t worry, My Lady,” he said channeling his flirty attitude, “we won’t be separated for that long. In fact, I will be back so quickly you won’t have the time to forget my purr-ity face.”

‘Of course I won’t, you tomcat, because of what I’m going to do. I hope this is a good idea.’

When she didn’t answer Chat back, he sighed and turning his back to her, he ready himself to jump.

Marinette realized she hadn’t replied to him and again, she wanted to face palm herself.

It was now or never.

“Chat, wait.” Ladybug called him in a hoarse voice.

She thought she was too late and he wasn’t going to listen and just leave. So she was a little surprised when he actually stopped in his tracks.

‘I guess I’m not the only who doesn’t want to go yet.’

“Chat, what if…” She licked her lips a second before continuing, “what if you stay with a friend?”

He looked at her like she had grown another head.

“Uhm, My Lady, I don’t know if you have noticed but there’s one little tiny problem about that idea.” He pointed at himself and even shook his finger to reaffirm his point.

This time, she allowed herself to roll her eyes.

“I was talking about someone who already saw you.”

She watched the way his features changed (even with his new appearance, he was as expressive as ever) from surprised to disbelief and finally to suspicious.

“I don’t know who you can be referring to, Bu-“

“What about Marinette?”

“No.” He replied, a conviction and severity she had never heard from him before.

“Bu-“

“I said no, Ladybug.”

“Why not? You two have already worked together, haven’t you?” She resonated. “You told me she was pretty calm when she tried to grab Evillustrator’s akumatized object and when you two were trapped inside the glass box. I must say she is not afraid to face a difficult situation.”

“That was different.” He hissed.

“And why would that be?” She probably sounded angrier than she should had been, but she didn’t like the implications about her he was saying to, well, her.

“Because the akuma was in love with her and wouldn’t hurt her! But I…” He looked at his hands, “…I don’t know if I won’t.”

‘So that was it.’ “Chat, look, I know you don’t like this but put in my place for a second. If I was going through the same thing you are going through…”

“Which you never will.” He noted.

“...and I decided to go missing, wouldn’t you be worried? Wouldn’t you want to know where I am? Wouldn’t you want to know if I’m fine or not?”

“I’m not telling you to go to live with her.” She explained. “Just go to her house a couple of hours so she can tell me how you are and if something has changed. I would be less worried if I know someone is keeping an eye on you while I search for more information. Think about it like a visit to the doctor, but with less uncomfortable questions, less time in the waiting room reading the same magazines all over again and better food. I wouldn’t promise less needles, because she is a designer and she probably has more of them than a doctor would ever see in their life.”

Chat let out a soft laugh at this.

‘There. That’s my silly kitty.’ She thought with fondness.

“I won’t pressure you any more if you don’t want to.” Ladybug said sincerely. “But…think about it, ok? Can you promise me that?”

Chat looked at her and make a grimace with his teeth. If she had to guess, she would have said that he was biting his lip in concentration.

“Yeah, I will think about it, Bug. Promise.” He said with a smile. This time, it wasn’t a forced one.

“Good.” She said.

Another silent, this time a more comfortable one, began to settle between them…

…that was interrupted by the growl of two stomachs.

Both heroes blushed in embarrassment.

“Ah, well, I think I must…ergh…go.”

“Yeah, sure, I mean it’s lunch time so…”

“Yes, I’m so hungry I could eat two wheels of Camembert. “

“What?” Ladybug giggled at this new piece of information. Chat liked cheese?

“No! I mean…I…ugh…this is my kwami’s fault.”

Ladybug’s giggles only increased.

Picking up her yo-yo, she prepared herself to go.

“Well, see ya later, Chat Noir. Don’t forget about what you promised.”

“Bye, My Lady. And don’t worry, I won’t.”

“Have a grate lunch!”

“My Lady!”

Marinette’s laughs could be heard the whole way to her house.

When she landed on her balcony, she released her transformation off and closed her eyes, waiting for the lecture that her kwami would surely do to her.

But nothing happened.

She slowly opened her eyes and found herself looking to big blue eyes that were very close to her face.

She squeaked.

“What?” Tikki tilted her head at her holder’s actions

“Tikki! Don’t do that again!” Marinette held a hand against her chest. Too many emotions for one day.

“Sorry. But you had your eyes closed and you were making a weird face. I thought you had fallen asleep and were having a nightmare.”

Sometimes Marinette got surprised at her kwami’s innocence.

“I thought you were going to call me out because of what I proposed to Chat. You know…how I’m risking my secret identity and all that jazz?”

Tikki looked at her for a moment and then sighed.

“I may not agree about risking your identity that way but that’s the way I have always believed it should go. But in the end, it’s your decision and I’m here to support you. I know you can handle yourself well, Marinette.”

She smiled at that.

She was so lucky to have such an amazing friend in Tikki.

“Thank you.” Marinette said, scratching the little god’s head with affection.

“Besides,” Tikki said, “Chat being here can still allow me to talk to his kwami, even if he can’t detransform.”

“Wait, really?” Marinette asked with hope.

Tikki nodded.

“It’s not as easy as a face to face talk, but yes I can do it. But it also depends on Chat Noir’s kwami. If he doesn’t want to or can’t talk, I won’t be able to communicate with him.”

‘But it’s better than nothing’. Marinette thought.

“So now it’s up to Chat if he accepts my proposal.” She concluded.

“Yes.”

Marinette nodded in acknowledgment.

“Well, it’s was good thing then that I decided to talk to him this early. It has given us more time to figure out what to do.”

In that moment, her stomach reminded her again what time it was.

‘Right. Lunch break. I think my parents are out so I don’t need to transform again and enter with the front door.’

“Tikki, I’m going to eat something. How many cookies do you want?”

The kwami wiggled at the mention of her favorite food.

“Three please!” She chirped.

Marinette giggled. “Three will be then! Now stay here and if you want to rest between my flowers, go ahead, but be careful, ok? I don’t want another accident like the last time.”

“Sure thing!”

Marinette shook her head in amusement and then went down through her trapdoor, smile still on her face.

Smile that was off her kwami’s face the moment her holder was out of sight.

‘I know you are right about the time, Marinette.’

‘Because Chat Noir is already showing the symptoms of year one.’

After his encounter with Ladybug, Adrien’s day passed out in a dizzy blur.

He sent a message to Nathalie, telling her that he wasn’t going to go to school and instead he was going to stay indoors studying for his exams. Once he was finished he was going to call her again and ask her for permission to have a sleepover with his friends. He knew he was lying, but his excuse to stay in his house and not being out must be believable.

That also would make it so his food would be delivered to his room. That was a relief since he didn’t want to scare Giuseppe -or anyone- again. The Gorilla would also be free these days. Adrien knew how much that man deserved some rest for dealing with his behavior. (The same ones Nathalie deserved too. He would need to convince his father to give her some vacations.)

After talking to Nathalie and checking the Ladybog for any akuma attack, he decided to take a shower. At first he had thought it would be weird, but since the suit was attached to his skin, the feeling of the water dropping on his back was exactly what he needed.

He took several naps the rest of the afternoon, some of them didn’t contain anything. Some of them were nightmares.

He actually tried to study too. If he was going to be confined, at least he was going to do something productive, apart from sleeping.

He thought about Ladybug’s suggestion too.

Adrien wasn’t sure about what to do. He understood why his Lady chose her to check on him. Marinette was one of the few people he knew that wouldn’t freak out because of a superhero and would actually stay focused when she needed to. She wouldn’t hesitate to tell him to stop if he happened to be doing something stupid. He knew that. He would trust Marinette anytime, in and out of the suit.

But…

He looked at his trash can, the amount of ashes that lied in there, a reminder of all the paper sheets he has ‘unconsciously’ destroyed.

…he was scared of himself.

It was already past 11pm when Adrien tossed away the book he needed to read for his Literature exam. He couldn’t just focus in the words.

‘Ugh, what should I do now?’

‘Stop whining is a good option.’ A voice suddenly spoke to him.

Adrien jumped out of his bed and crouched into a defensive position. He let out a growl and a hiss, his head turning left and right searching for the invader.

“Who is there? Are you an akuma? Show yourself and stop hiding!”

‘Jeez, kid, it’s, what? Ten hours? And you forgot about me already? I’m deeply offended.’

Adrien quickly changed his stance to one of curiosity. He knew that voice, he was sure of it. But who..?

‘Oh, c’mon! I’m in your head but I can’t sound that different! Also did you really think if I was an akuma I would actually answer your question? And what’s about that double redundancy? Ugh, kids these days.’

Wait…Plagg?

Adrien felt amusement run through his body

‘Took you long enough, kitten.’

“Plagg! Oh my god, I have missed you so much!” Adrien felt like he was about to cry.

‘Don’t cry kid. And I know, I’m very memorable.’

“What happened? Why are you talking me just now? Where are you?”

‘Uh, I already said I was in your head –thank you very much for the attention, kiddo.’

Adrien felt a little embarrassed at that and for some reason, something like annoyance too.

“Sorry”

‘Eh, don’t sweat it, it’s ok. I’m a little confused too. Also since I’m in your head you can speak without actually speaking, you know? You can just think what you need to tell me and voilà.’

Adrien tilted his head and after a moment of consideration, his first mind-conversation began with a:

‘Hi!’

…And the he felt Plagg facepalming.

‘Seriously, you can tell me whatever you want to and you said ‘hi!’? Unbelievable.’

Now it was Adrien to feel annoyed.

‘I’m sorry, but this is my head you are into so I can think whatever I want.’

‘See, that’s much better. You learn fast, kid.’

For a moment Adrien swore he felt Plagg chuckle and something like… proud… coming from him. But...?

‘Ah, you noticed. Yeah, I think that whatever happened to us when you transformed, has fused our minds and feelings. Basically I feel what you do and you feel what I feel.’

Ok, that was…actually pretty cool. Usually, when he was normally transformed, he could feel Plagg’s presence behind his mind, but nothing else. He knew that Plagg could also see what he saw during battle but they never had had this kind of interaction before.

‘Yeah, it’ is awesome, isn’t it? But you still need to learn how to block your thoughts. I can read you right now like an open book. We may share feelings and mind conversations, but that doesn’t mean I need to know every single though of that teenager brain of yours. Yuck.’

Adrien chuckled at Plagg’s antics. Oh, how much he had missed this.

‘Yes, yes, kiss and hugs for later. Now, I heard you had a problem with a decision that Lady Luck asked of you?’

Adrien raised a mentally eyebrow.

‘Do you really want to know about my problems?’

‘Sure, it’s kinda boring here actually, so go yourself. Tell Dr. Plagg your problems.’

Adrien sighed, physically and mentally.

‘Yeah. She…well…I first told her it would for the best if I disappear for a while.’

‘Why?’

‘Because my powers are leaking. I’m hurting people and I don’t know how to control it. So I told her it would be for the best if I disappear for a while.’

‘Bet she didn’t take it well, huh?’

‘She didn’t.’

‘Well, I see why. You are her partner and her friend. She is worried and actually tries to help and the first thing you said is: ‘I don’t need you, I’m a solitary hero with a sad past so I’ll do my things- wind moving my hair- alone without help.’ Cut to dramatic background music.’

‘That’s not what I said.’

‘Doesn’t matter. The intention was that.’

‘I…I just didn’t want to hurt anybody. If I confine myself, no one would get hurt anymore.’

‘Except for you.’

Adrien groaned and hid his face between his hands.

‘Look kid, I get you want to do things right but running away…is not one of them. Once you are isolated from everyone what would you do next? You don’t even know what you need to look at for. Miss Spots is offering her help because maybe she has some information that will be helpful. But she also needs yours because she doesn’t have all the pieces of the puzzle. If you kept that information just for you, is not going to lead you anywhere.’

‘So you are telling me…’

Adrien felt his kwami roll his eyes.

‘That you need help.’

He sighed.

‘What should I do about her idea, then?’

“What about it?’

‘I mean…Ladybug suggested that since she can’t be checking on me all the time, that I should stay with a friend that can keep her up to date.’

‘Friend of yours or hers?’

‘Both, I think. I don’t know how Ladybug knows her but she is my friend from school.’

‘Pigtails or Glasses?’

‘Pigtails’

‘Ah, the girl from the Evillustrator incident. She seems fun.’

‘She is great.’

‘Do you trust her?’

‘Ladybug does.’

‘I’m asking you, Adrien.’

‘Yes.’

‘Then what’s the problem?’

Adrien closed his eyes. He really didn’t want to talk about it.

‘Then show me.’

He did.

‘Ah, I see.’

‘So…?’

‘Well, she is very calm for almost being killed by a flowerpot’

‘Thanks for reminding me that, Plagg.’

‘Hey, I’m just telling what I saw.’

‘Can we skip to the part you give me the advice, please?’

‘…Well,’ Plagg began saying after a few seconds of silence, ‘you know her better than I do. So it’s up to you to decide whether you can trust her with this or not.’

Adrien was going to interrupt, but he felt that Plagg wanted to tell more.

‘But, for what I have seen in your memories,’ Adrien blushed at that, ‘she seems a very good person that cares for you. Not only for you, Adrien Agreste, son of Gabriel Agreste fashion designer, nor for you, Chat Noir, hero of Paris. You, Adrien. She cares about you.’

Adrien remained silent, considering every word Plagg told him.

‘So, what are you going to do?’

He wasn’t sure if that question came from his own mind or from Plagg, but he really didn’t care. He had made his decision.

He approached his bed and looked under it, hoping what he needed was still there.

It was.

He grabbed the silver object that had been lying under his bed since the previous afternoon and brushed some dust out of it. He then pressed the big green pawn in the middle of it, which turned on the artifact.

“I have a call to make.”

197 notes · View notes

janiedean · 8 years ago

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Oh my god, stop those pointless dramatics. You can talk about whatever you want, idc, but personally i wouldn't suppose to Know™ anything about Italian politics even if i was masterfully informed and that is because, simply, i don't live there and would feel like it's just not my place. Hell, i wouldn't suppose to know the state of mind of people who live in the east of France because i don't live there either! It's just intellectual honesty.

Also this: "I inform myself and I read more about american politics [more] than the average trump voter". Wow. Some standards there. I bet you feel real proud of that achievement. You're basically illustrating my point that far right fascism is nothing more than the product of neo-liberalism, two sides of the same coins.

........................

you really are that thick aren’t you

who says I know anything about how french people feel, I know objectively that a fascist is a fascist and therefore worse than any other option bye

re how americans feel hey, I got told by americans I knew more about their politics than most of their fellow countrymen, I suppose... I..... know...... something? also nice try but their fucking elections still influence my life so I still have a right to talk about it bye

Some standards there. I bet you feel real proud of that achievement. > well given that the average trump voter was powerful enough to put him in power I think it’s a thing a lot less funny than you’d think. since, like, they put him in power. without informing themselves. same as half of the brexit voters who wanted to DO THE PROTEST VOTE without understanding what they were up for. I also think I’m more informed than the average american voter period tbh but shhh

btw I absolutely do not complain if people informed about italian elections want to talk about italian elections. I mean, honestly our elections aren’t nowhere as important as french/german/british ones but if someone says ‘omg I’m concerned that grillo might win’ I don’t tell them they need to keep their mouth shut since I also am concerned that he might win. but no one literally gives a fuck about italian elections so idk what you’re fishing there

You're basically illustrating my point that far right fascism is nothing more than the product of neo-liberalism, two sides of the same coins. > anon, far right fascism existed since the 20s. some dude named mussolini invented it. and trump has actual neonazis in his circle, he’s not a regular neoliberalist like reagan, which is why I think trump is a neofascist and reagan and thatcher were not. like, please, for the love of everything, you’re telling me that I’m some kinda arrogant asshole who doesn’t know anything about politics and then you tell me this crap? srsly? are you for real? you can’t even basically distinguish the difference? wow. I’m appalled.

like, honestly, can you just fuck off and gloat in your absolute superior knowledge if that makes you feel better and stop trying to explain me how fascists are somehow the same as their opponents? because you’re getting boring. jfc.

ma anvedi che devo risponde a sta roba il venticinque aprile porcodiquel -

#nclpf #politics tag #shoot me roland before i breed #va bene va bene va bene in verità #quanto mi piaci mai semplicità #tumblrian vil razza dannata a qual prezzo vendeste il cervello #Anonymous #ask post

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mojra-of-kobol · 8 years ago

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I think I’m a terrible person, for posting such a thing here, but I have to get it off my chest. It’s a personal matter, so you may skip this post. I just feel that if I don’t write it down in any permanent way I’d go crazy.

My mom has been struggling with cancer for last 5 years, but I think now she’s reached the end of her path. I don’t live with her anymore, I had to move out for work so I haven’t been there to watch her progress. Any judgement I did was via phone calls. Not really reliable I know it now.

On monday I called her, since she missed our sunday chats. She nonchalantly told me she’s in a hospital receiving transfusion. I was terrified, ‘why would you need transfusion, ma? What’s happening?’ all she said was ‘it’s nothing love, I just felt weak’ and she hung up! I tried to contact her through the night she never picked up. I was literary shitting bricks and about to build a fort.

Next day I managed to contact mom’s close friend, let’s call her Mrs. E for the sake of the story. She told me mom had a haemorrhage. I nearly passed out at the news. I asked E what the hell happened. She said mom had lower gastrointestinal bleeding and passed out. She kept on refusing medical help, until grandma called ambulance when mom was out. E also told that mom is in such a bad condition they’re considering palliative care. So I was horrified how bad the situation was, but decided to try calling mom, since E had a history of overreacting (she’s really dramatic). E also asked not to tell mom I spoke with her since she forbade that. I reached mom, she told she’s fine, she’s just weak and had low RBC count that’s why she needed transfusion, never mentioned haemorrhage. Nice poker face ma. I didn’t let on I knew because if she’s really that fragile I don’t want to anger her. Last thing I want is to make her suffer. I asked if she needs me, if I should visit her, she refused of course. Forbade it even ‘Don’t you dare come home!’

It’s wednesday, my dudes. Since there’s no objective source of information here (mom says she’s fine, E that it’s bad) I tried to call mom’s hospital and they told me I cannot access my own mothers information since she didn’t enable me to do so. Fucking perfect. More unknown is exactly what I need right now. At 6 p.m. ma called me from another number. ‘that’s new’ I thought, when she revealed that someone stole her phone at the hospital. Srsly, what kind of dick steals a sick person’s phone? Asked me what to do? She seemed lost. I told her I’d block the number, not to worry. Also when she spoke with me it seemed to me she thought she was talking to Mrs. E. She was harsh and she’s never talked to me like this. Through the 10 minutes it took me to call the call center and block the number mom left me 2 messages, in each convincing me even more that she didn’t know she was speaking to her daughter. I figured that if mom is so lost, she might have her phone in her purse or somewhere. I called the hospital she was in and they never found it. I managed to sweet talk the nurse to tell me about mom’s condition. She never mentioned haemorrhage, but confirmed altered mental state and restlessness, as well as haemoglobin as low as 7,0 (where norm is 13).

So here I am, a terrible person who hasn’t arrived home when her mother is probably dying (I’m shaking as I write those words). And I won’t because I promised my mom when she was still sane that I won’t visit her in her final days, that she wants to be left alone, no visitors. I believe she doesn’t want me to know what’s really happening to her because she’s protecting me (I have sinoatrial block, my heart tends to stop for 2 seconds or so, then it goes into escape rhythm, I basically qualify for a pacer. Any form of stress means hours of arrhythmia). She’s keeping me in the dark to save me from watching her dying. And I’m torn, because she’s my mom and I love her dearly and I want to be with her. And I can’t. Because if I break our promise, she’ll die with regret, upset because she couldn’t protect me from the whole process. And I won’t come home to be with her because I love her and I want to keep the promise. I want to give my mother that last proof of her strength, that even bedridden and weak she has power to protect me. And I’m not depriving her of that. Not because I’m anguished and it’d give me solace to be with her in her final moments. Not because it is expected of me by the society.

I’m anguished right now. As I said I’m not writing this to justify myself. I just need to let go of these thought somewhat or else I’d burst.

#personal #anguish #loss #dying

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tellywoodtrash · 7 years ago

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ishqbaaz 04.10.17 lb

wow, mishra still has a job. i thought khanna had taken over all of those duties.

his face as she bitches about him.

“GAPPI AUR JHOOTA KISM KA INSAAN.” LMAO

dadi’s a terrible actor. truly terrible.

LMAO LOOK AT HIS PRIDE AT DADI’S PRAISE. BUDDY, GRANDMAS AREN’T THE MOST OBJECTIVE OF PEOPLE.

“billu ke tante”

honestly, they should just change the name of the show to this.

i am mesmerized by all the faces he’s making. a work of art.

HA! HA HA! PAKAD LIYAAAAAAAAAAAA

LOLOLOL TOO LATE.

snorttttttttttttt. son, give uppp. absolutely no one here is convinced you’re talking to mishra.

“it’s not fair on ME shivaay. shivaay.”

what a fucking idiot.

“hazaar nahi hai, shivaay is a rare name ok!!!!!!”

this idiot’s commitment to his plan lasted a whole hour. like, what a weakass loser.

“inki PATELI mein aa gayi main.”

anika’s on fire with her new vocabulary today.

snort. bitching about the ring.

USKE BAARE MEIN KUCH BHI BOLO, CHALEGA. RING KE BAARE MEIN MAT BOLO!!!!!! HE SPENT A WHOLE DAY ON IT. IT’S RING #69!!!!

hehehehehehehe 69 😏😏😏😏

“iska toh time up ho gaya.”

oh my heart why is she so beautiful and adorable and ughhhhhhhhhh she’s ruining my life shivaay how the fuck could you do this to her?!!? if she was my wife i wouldn’t let her leave my siiiiiiiiight.

KAANCHO KA HRITHIK ROSHAN HAHAHAHAHA

lmaooooo she’s trading it for a dinner settttttttttttt

“jab dene waale ko emotion ki padi nahi hai, toh main kya emotion ka achchaar daaloongi?”

preach!!!!!

LOL DADI IS SUCH TRAITOR. zero value for khoon and khaandaan.

his teeth clenching rage tho.

omgggggggggg, he just legit climbed over the table. billu fucking hell, you’re the worsttttt at this.

“aapko bada pata hai iske baare mein.”

shit’s getting serious.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaand KNOCK OUT. straight to the fucking heart.

fake wife who looks like the real wife is here.

ugh om, how can you be so good at one relationship and so fucking crap at another???? can’t you just be shit at everything so i can haaaate you??

also, ouff, what even is your face. *kisses the screen*

he hasn’t said a sherrrrr for a really long time though.

ok i’m crying at the sher. fuck you ommmmmmmmmm. i’m trying to haaate you here!

“can i get a hug??”

lol these two always have the most emotional hugs when rudra isn’t here. guess his position in the bromance is really clear now.

yeahhhhh, sureeeee, bada aaya share karne waala.

billu’s fooling absolutely NO ONE with his bs. like... golden kela for your efforts, son.

LOL OF COURSE OM’S HERE TO DO BHAABI’S BIDDING.

MY GOD DOES ANYONE EVEN LOVE SHIVAAY ANYMORE, OR DO THEY JUST CONSIDER HIM ANIKA’S HUSBAND AND TOLERATE HIM????

even though this is all for a purpose, i’m glad om is at least talking about his relationship and problems.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOPS!

“bitch, you are in soooooooooooooooo much trouble.”

[inside billu’s head]:

OM, EVEN “AMNESIAC” SHIVAAY REMEMBERS YOUR DAMN WIFE. TU BHI KABHI YAAD KARLE, BEHENCH....

god anika, such pissssss poooooor hiding job.

is anika in some kinda danger from tanya/tanya’s boss? like he seemed more spooked by the fact that tanya is also here, rather than just anika snooping.

“tu kya kar raha hai, aur kyun kar raha hai, yeh sirf tu jaanta hai.”

the tagline to the show “billu ke tante”

“... teri wajah se, kisi ka dil toot raha hai.”

ok, weeping like a bitch baby rn. the aniKara brotp is steadily climbing to be up there for me with shivRi.

also lord, i can’t help but think of @nawaazishein‘s latest text post meme where it was like “is a wreck, gives others lifestyle advice.” OM THE FUCK YOU EVEN DOING WITH YOUR DAMN LIFE????

ok tanya’s dead eyed stare is creeping me out. she looks like if someone stole jankee’s soul and made her into a zombie.

lol the oberois are suchhhhhh a big corporation and they still maintain PAPER records of accounts???? why do you not have a software that generates reports with the click of a button????

loving tej’s jazzzzzzy pink and blue files.

OOOOOOOOOOOH KHOOOOOOOOOON

tej’s gotten a creepyyyy invite to the mills tooooo.

OMG A CASSETTE PLAYER. THAT’S THE MOST SHOCKING THING RN. WHERE THE FUCK EVEN DID SOMEONE GET ONE OF THOSE FROM?????

oh hoooooo, saare ke saaare buddhe mile hue hai.

abhay’s making his shark waale moves on chashmish.

“kyunki woh mera bhai hai. aur main apne bhaiyyon ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta hoon.”

ok he’s deffffffffffinitely shivaay’s chota bhai. or something.

oh shakti ji, you’ll need all the divine providence you can get.

yup. he’s gotten his fun little invite too! it’s a paaaaaaaaaarty!

no srsly, this chotu shark singh oberoi is way better at business than the original and i really want him to take everything over already. he’s so well prepared and has all the paperwork all ready and shiz!

lmao i knewwwwwww he’d fuck chashmish over in some way. after that exploding house stunt, i’d come to expect it.

ooooh he kinda looks like my rare white-boy crush, jake gyllenhaal. *love for abhay intensifies*

PLEASE ABHAY, PLEASE BE GOOD AND NOT EVIL. COZ I LOVE YOU, YOU BABY BADASS.

ooooooooooooh, is it a clue, that he spray painted an S??? is abhay an alias? does his real name start with S???

shankar? to keep with the lord shiva theme?

murder party’s getting staaaaaaaaaaaaaarted at the millllllls!

god bless your faaaaaaaace.

yeh shaayari bhi karta hai. my god, is he some kinda genetic hybrid/chimera of the three oBros?

i mean rudra has no redeeming quality other than muscle tone, so... i guess that’s his contribution to the perfection that is abhay?

i love how he calls om “ghalib”

“tabaahi” seems to be abhay’s favourite word, and tbh i’m a little concerned.

my favourite word is “snack”. because i love snacks.

LMAO RUDRA HANDLING A LAND DEAL IS THE BIGGEST JOKE. EVER. LIKE I WOULD LITERALLY TRUST KHANNA TO GET WORK DONE BETTER THAN RUDRA. I WOULD TRUST SAHILLLLL TO GET WORK DONE BETTER THAN RUDRA. (sumo’s voice calling him “cryyyyy babyyyyy” echoing in my head.)

also, i didn’t even notice rudra was missing. i was just... relieved that he was leaving bhavya the fuck alone.

GET A MOVE ON WITH THIS MILL WAALA RAAZ ALREADY.

each one of these 4 be thinking ‘it’s bad enough having to see these people in my own home, where i live, but to meet them outside too? ugh.’

is this kalyani mills raaz related to shivaay’s thing, or is that a whooooole different thing? ALSO ARE EITHER OF THESE THINGS RELATED TO THE WHOLE RAAZ DADI DIDN’T WANT ANIKA TO DISCOVER???? THERE’S TOO MANY FUCKING RAAZS HERE AND I’M CONFUSED.

LET QUEEN SVETLANA BE BEHIND THIS!!!!!!!!

jhanvi’s defense of tej has me rolling my eyes but i am loving shakti’s defense of pinky. i just like supportive husbands ok??!??!

ok whaaaaaaaat did you awful fuckers doooooooooo???

OMG GAURIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII *jumps into screen and smothers my girl with hugs and kisses*

oh she was in bareilly to look after MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

OH GOD GAURI YOU STUPID GIRL FUCK OMKARA. LIKE........... IN A NON SEXUAL WAY. FUCK HIM TO FUCKING FUCK, HE’S THE FUCKING WORST.

LAAYAK?!?!?! PYAAR?!?!?! GIRL OUFFFFFF AKAL GHAAAS CHARRNE GAYI HAI KYA TUMHARI???????????????

jab jaate waqt nahi bataaya, toh aate waqt kyun bataa rahi ho???

typical desi husband/dad waala phone picking up: “hmmm?”

OMFG HE HUNG UP ON HER WHAT A RUDEASS BITCH I HATE HIMMMMMMMMMM

tumhaare “jhaanse” mein nahi phasne waala. omfg. die omkara. no really, just.... die. for a little bit. till i can stop being so mad.

OMG BHAVYA’S ACTUALLY AT HER JOB. LOOK HOW PRODUCTIVE SHE’S BEING WHEN RUDRA ISN’T FUCKING UP HER LIFE

omg just taaaaaaaaaaaake the mithai bhavya. it’s fesitval season too. like... what even is dusshera/diwali without eating your own weight in kaaju katlis???

anti corruption???? rishwat??? this better not be some new shit rudra has put in her life. i wouldn’t put it past him to pull such crap.

lmao why the fuck would she keep proof of her taking bribes in the files of her office?!!?!?!?

oh shit the mithaiiiii box is gonna have money.

ok literally who cares about this issue about bhavya??? there’s so many other plots that need resolving????

also, is this a sultan thing or.....????

mill incident happened 25 years ago. meaning shivaay was about 8, and om about 2 or 3. rudra and prinku were non existent.

oh man, what a glorious-sounding time. take me back to then, so i can live in a world where there’s no rudra or prinku!!!!!!!!!

interesting use of the word “tabaaahi”, pinky! hmmmmmm, who’s been using that word a lot lately????

ugh it’s just gonna be something lame like they set the mills on fire for insurance money coz they were in financial trouble or some shit.

is this the same incident that tia’s dad was implicated in? i need to go back and investigate.

kamaaal hai gauri, you told this punkass english teacher where you were going but no one in the house???? like, you could have just told dadi/jhanvi if you didn’t wanna bother shivika about it.

ugh arjun no one wants your fucking love advice, you shady-hotel-visiting weirdo.

OH GOD DON’T MAKE HER REHEARSE. 1. IT’S WEIRD AND PERSONAL. AND 2. OF COURSE OM IS GOING TO HEAR THIS AND HIS FUCKED UP BRAIN IS GOING TO FUCK IT UP FURTHER

UGH I CAN’T EVEN WATCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

while shivaay has the wholesome power of detecting wife’s presence, this creep has the superpower of super hearing. that he’s using to eavesdrop on his wife.

gosh and he looks so creepy, like a fucking serial killer. jesus how can one man look so entirely different in two scenes???

GHINNNNNNNNNNN TOH MUJHE TUMPE AATI OMKARA YOU SUCKKKKKK OMG YOU SUCK MORE THAN WORK ON A WEEKEND AND THAT’S ONE OF THE SUCKIEST THINGS EVER.

siiiiiiiiiiiiigh. as usual, yet another woman’s hasta-khelta, mostly perfect life has been ruined to the power of tiffany after coming in contact with the oberois.

thank god sumo, mallika and tia got out when they could.

i hope wherever she is, ragini is thanking her lucky stars. and that she’s married vikram.

at least officer dad believes her.

YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKES THIS CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEP. i genuinely got scared and screamed a little.

ugh this hug is giving me michmichiiiii. get your filthyyyyy paws off my girl!

but also, him struggling with both rage and having missed her and wanting to genuinely hug her. *sighhhhhh* oh omki. why are you so fuckeddd uppppp?????????????

OK THEY NEED TO STOP WITH THE JUMP SHOTS COZ I’M GENUINELY A LITTLE SCARED OF KUNAL RIGHT NOW

ugh this fakeassssssssss bitchhhhhh i hate him sooooo much my godddddddd.

oh shit, don’t want your surpriseeeee. don’t wantttt.

GOOD. END THE RELATIONSHIP. FREE HER ALREADY. I JUST WANT MY GIRL TO BE FREE OF YOUR SOUL-SUCKING, TOXIC PRESENCE. YOU’RE NOT EVEN WORTHY OF CHAATOFYING THE DHOOL OFF MY QUEEN’S FEET. YOU IRREDEEMABLE FUCKWIT OF THE FIRST ORDER.

shivaay just can’t keep away from this “random strange woman who’s calling herself his wife”.

oh god i’m fucking crying at her breakdown already, how am i going to watch it tomorrow????

ok, thank god he gave up the act and hugged her back.

BUT OH NO, TANYA IS WATCHING AND HE’S ABOUT TO BREAK MY GIRL’S HEART AGAIN!!!!!11!!!!

#ishqbaaz #ishqbaaaz #ib episode liveblogs #episode liveblogs #041017 ib lb

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