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4urvalidation · 2 months ago

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A CASE OF LIMERENCE | Chapter Twelve

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A/N: Oh we went deep for this one folks. Lots of callbacks and realizations and if you think this is bad, well - prepare for it to get even worse 😃 Hope you enjoy.

TW: Mentions of violence, alcohol, drug use, guns and finally - Rafe being a violent piece of work. Mild sexual and suggestive content, mostly implied and shown through the form of texting (aka characters are horny again and doing stupid things because of it)

The places where Rafe’s fingers brushed her skin burn; his crass words echoing in the back of her head as Leni moves through the busy restaurant. Like some sort of broken record, the moment plays before her - his stormy blue eyes, stupid smirk and the way he called her baby.

Especially the way he called her baby;

Set her entire body aflame;

Promised to make her feel good.

Real good.

A shiver runs down Leni’s spine and then, she spots JJ.

He sits alone, gaze focused on the empty table before him, tufts of messy blonde hair stuck between a tightly clenched fist. When he sees her, something shifts behind his eyes - the usual calmness, that perfect clear blue sky disappears and is replaced with something alien; something dark.

“What did that bastard want?” JJ asks, practically spitting at her and she can’t. His name escapes her lips in a form of a tired, borderline bored sigh because that’s exactly what this whole sudden machismo thing of his is - boring. “Leni!?”

“This is ridiculous. You are being ridiculous.” She says, ready to leave, but JJ is springing from his seat; chair pushed back so aggressively, it screeches against the floor with such vigor, the sound echoes across the entire restaurant and stops Leni right in her tracks.

“What did he want?”

“I told you! He’s looking for Rose!”

“And what do you have anything to do with that?”

“She’s my Godmother?”

“Right.“ JJ swallows, his cheeks suddenly red. “Still - that doesn’t explain why he gotta hound you like that.”

“Hound me? He’s never-” Just then, her mind almost instantly reminds her of that night; the pressure of Rafe’s body against hers; his fingers curled around her wrists; his bloodied face and haunting stare… She thinks of all the times he’s shown up unannounced; practically forcing himself inside her orbit and turning her entire existence inside out.

JJ is right.

Ever since she’s arrived on this island, all Rafe has ever done is hound her. His unnerving presence; the callous way he speaks to her - it enrages Leni; makes her want to tear at her skin and yet, all she wants to do is be around him. To feel the weight of his stormy gaze on her body and be the reason why he keeps on making that stupid smirk…

“Baby,” The gruffness in JJ’s tone disappears. So does that strange look in his eye and he’s walking towards her now; fingertips gingerly brushing the skin around her elbows, “I’ve seen the way he looks at you-”

“The way he looks at me?”

“Yes. Leni, he-”

“I see. This has nothing to do with Rafe, does it?”

“It has everything to do with Rafe!”

“Why? Cause he just happens to be a guy who’s talking to me and you don’t like that?”

JJ’s mouth falls slack. “You don’t get it.”

“Oh, I get it.”

“No, you don’t.”

“I actually do.”

“No! You don’t! I’m not saying this cause he just happens to be a guy that’s talking to you! I don’t give a shit about that! You can talk to whoever you want!”

“Just not Rafe?”

“Just not Rafe.” JJ echoes, his voice suddenly defeated, shoulders slumped. “Leni… he’s… he’s bad news.” Pieces of all the conversations she’s had with Rose over the years flash before her eyes like a weird case of deja vu. But that’s not the worst thing. The worst thing is her insatiable need to defend Rafe; find some kind of proof to show JJ that the person he’s warning her about is different now.

“Cause he’s a Kook?”

“He could be a Pogue and I’ll still tell you the same thing.”

“That’s ‘cause you don’t know him.” Leni’s breath catches in her throat and she can feel an onslaught of tears slowly fighting their way into the corners of her eyes. The last thing she wants is for JJ to see her cry so, as gently as possible, she moves away from his touch, but he holds onto her even tighter.

“No. You don’t know him. At least not the way we do. You might’ve spent all your summers on that plantation and played a couple of pranks on him when he pissed you off, but you don’t know Rafe Cameron the way us Pogues do!”

“I have to get back to work.” She says, pulling away; her voice hoarse and weepy and the tears are really threatening to come out now.

“Has Sarah told you about all the things he’s done? (“Jay…”) Has she told you about the time he almost ran us off the road? Or how he and his friends beat Pope to a fucking pulp? Or how he told Sarah she is the reason for their dad’s death? D’you know anything ‘bout that? What about him kicking her out of their home? All those months he spent humiliating her publicly? Showing up at the Chateau hopped up on coke and with a gun only to OD and have the people he wanted dead rush him to the fucking hospital? You know anything about that?!”

Leni is crying.

Silent, bitter tears topple down her face as her entire body begins to shake uncontrollably.

He’s insane.

Rose was right.

Rafe’s insane.

She’s crushing on an actual insane person.

JJ’s grip softens and the second she no longer feels his touch on her skin, she makes a run for it. It’s a cowardly thing to do - leaving without an answer or a proper goodbye, but what the fuck is she supposed to say to all of that? He made his point. Just like every other person in her life apparently has and she hates them all of it, but mostly - Leni hates herself.

Knowing Cleo is swiftly on her way, calms Leni down a little, but that doesn’t mean the prickling in her fingertips is willing to stop anytime soon. Her mind’s in a swirl; a whirlpool of ever changing emotions and… Rafe.

Rafe and that haunted look in his eyes; his soft smiles; his rough fingers soft against her skin; his shit eating smirks; the way he says her name; the feeling he creates in both her chest and between her thighs and finally - that night.

The memory washes over her like the gentlest of waves; the smell of the ocean and his cologne permanently stuck behind her nostrils and if Leni were to close her eyes just now, she’d immediately find herself transported there: on Rafe’s boat. She’s got her gaze glued stubbornly on the ever growing sunset; quietly watching as the fading sun paints the ocean a strange orange hue. Rafe is right behind her, steering the boat and allowing the silence between them to grow deeper and deeper. It’s a comfortable one; the kind she hasn’t experienced in a while and she’s surprised - who would’ve thought that moments like these could’ve been experienced with someone like him.

When she finally decides to glance over at Rafe - subtly and past her shoulder - his gaze is already there, resting steadily on her. Her heart skips a beat and the corners of his lips perk up and almost immediately she feels the spread of a warm fuzzy feeling all across the pit of her belly.

The feeling repeats and Leni opens her eyes. She’s lying there, comfortably sprung on her bed; the sound of the rumbling ocean miles away, but the weight of Rafe’s soft gaze still ever present on her prickling skin.

How could it be that the person on the boat and the one JJ is so adamant she keeps away from, be the same?

The question swirls inside her brain until it’s completely lost its meaning; until she’s fourteen again and there’s a fist around her braid. She finds herself being yanked backwards and then slammed recklessly against the cold refrigerator door. Before her - with his face pressed inches away from her own- stands Rafe. His pupils are blown out, dark; darker than the night sky behind him and he’s sweaty, almost out of breath and reeking of weed and whiskey.

“If I ever catch you pulling that shit again, next time you wake up it’ll be with your braid in your mouth!”

Back then Leni had convinced herself she deserved it. The hurt his words caused Sarah faded away, but the smell of dog piss in his room didn’t. As a matter of fact it lingered for the next couple of days, much like the bruise she got when he shoved her against the fridge. It took her an entire year to tell Sarah about it and now, Leni sits there wondering just how much time does it have to pass in order to finally admit to herself that he is the reason why she skipped the past two summers.

He was drunk, she tells herself, but the prickling in her fingertips continues. He was drunk and he was high and you pissed him off! A shiver runs down her spine, causing at least a hundred dozen goosebumps to erupt all over her skin. He was just trying to scare you. It’s not like he was really gonna do it and yet, there he was - doing far more awful things.

But he was probably drunk. Or high. Or both. She reaches for her loose braid, gently throwing it over her shoulder and ignoring the numbness in her brittle fingers. The Rafe she’s come to know now is clean. Calm. Measured. Still as haughty and full of himself as always, but there’s a certain charm that comes with all that straightforwardness and-

Fist.

Her very first night on the island flashes before Leni’s eyes; the sound of Rafe’s clenched hand colliding with Tannyhill’s facade echoes loudly inside her head. But loud as those harsh words of his do.

Stupid bottle blonde ass whore.

The memory of the bitterness in his voice is so strong, she can taste it on her tongue.

He knows where she lives now.

And can hound her anytime he fucking wants.

Leni swallows and practically jumps out of her skin when she hears a faint knocking on her door.

Trembling, she moves towards it - her heart stuck in her throat - and almost collapses from relief when she sees Cleo’s smiling face through the peephole.

“Hey.” She breathes, voice barely sounding like her own.

“Damn girl, you could at least pretend to be happy to see me.” Cleo hugs her, but when their eyes meet, the usual sparkle in her eye is suddenly replaced with worry, “Hey, what happened? Why’re you all white as a ghost?”

Leni swallows, that awful taste finally out of her mouth, “Can we at least get some alcohol first? And then I’ll tell you everything.”

“Can I be honest?” Cleo says, her mouth full of pepperoni pizza. They’re lying on Leni’s queen sized bed, snacks and junk food all around them as an old Friends rerun is quietly playing in the back, “And a little mean?”

“Please! This is a mean free zone!”

“Okay. So, this isn’t the dump I thought it’d be.” Her exclaim makes Leni spring up a little, eyes wide in surprise, “I’m only saying this because… y’know, there have been rumors (“Rumors?”) Yes, rumors… You do realize you’re living in a hump and dump, right?”

“A hump and dump?” Now it’s Leni’s turn to talk with a mouthful. Except hers is filled with delicious sour candy and a large gulp of cheap rose. “What the fuck is a hump and dump?”

“Oh you know! A hump and dump! A place where you go to fuck. And never see each other again.”

“And how does Princess Cleo know about this hump and dump business?” Batting her eyelashes, Leni puts on her best sultry voice, teasing her friend relentlessly which in return earns her a nice playful punch in the elbow.

“You’re a menace.” Cleo laughs.

“So I’ve been told.”

“No, but really - isn’t Rose like this bigshot real estate agent? How come she didn’t get you a nice condo or something?”

Leni snorts, “I’ve actually been asking myself the same thing.” She takes another long swig from her drink, letting it burn all the way down her throat before realizing the possibility that Rafe might as well had the exact same question running round his mind earlier today.

But why didn’t he ask?

Why was her next move more important than Rose’s actual true motive?

And did Rose even have a motive to begin with?

“I think… “ She stares at the half-empty glass in her hand. The rose burns holes in the pit of her stomach. So do the Sour Patch Kids. And pepperoni pizza. “I think she might’ve done it to spite Rafe. One last fuck you before taking off for good… or something.”

“Okay, but there are other ways she could’ve done that. Like - far more creative ones.”

Like taking his baby sister and disappearing without a trace.

“Yeah,” Leni’s throat goes dry.

What if…

What if her Godmother needed something believable? A perfect coverup of sorts in case Rafe or anyone else were to peruse through all of her transactions before that big exit? Now that the idea has been planted inside her brain, it actually makes sense. No guise is more perfect than the one belonging to Rose’s beloved goddaughter. The one she oh so eagerly flew in every summer for the past nine years. Well, seven if she were to get technical, but Leni would rather not remind herself again of the two years she chose fear over Sarah.

She swallows.

The possibility that her Godmother might’ve used her doesn’t sit quite right in her stomach.

Neither does the cheap rose.

“Hey, we don’t need to be doing this right now.” Cleo says with the gentlest of smiles and Leni agrees. Tonight is supposed to be fun; she’s supposed to let go of all her crippling, menacing worries and spend time getting to know her brand new friend.

“You’re right.” Mimicking Cleo’s smile, Leni takes another long swig from her drink, emptying her glass and pouring herself another.

“Now, tell me about Rafe. What’s going on there?”

The sole mention of his name is enough for her to once again lose the feeling in her fingers. “Nothing.” She says, her face suddenly contorted in a painful scowl.

“What do you mean nothing? He came to see you at work. Left you a hundred bucks worth a tip. Promised you a birthday present, or wait - was the tip the birthday present?” Leni shakes her head, “Then what is it?”

“An orgasm.” She belches and Cleo’s mouth falls slack.

“A what?”

“You heard me, I’m not repeating it.”

“And?” Her friend wiggles her brows, a bright expectant look on her pretty face that unfortunately only manages to elicit a single, head throbbing eye roll from Leni. “He hasn’t given it to you yet?! Girl! What are you waiting for!? That man is crazy about you!”

“Or… just crazy in general.”

Cleo blinks. “Hold up. Is this about how he almost ran the boys off the road and the incident at the golf course with Pope and the time he was tryna be all gangster, brought a gun to a party and then blamed Sarah for their dad’s death?”

“Yes. That. All of… that.”

“But… he was like blitzed out on coke. I dunno about all those other times, but he definitely was on something when he showed up at the Chateau with guns blazing. Literally. And! Then he started dying on us and Sarah and John B had to rush him to the hospital or whatever.”

“So, he really did OD.”

“Yeah. Like, I genuinely believe that’s the only reason why he went to rehab… among, y’know… all the others.”

Leni nods and the room falls quiet.

Rafe’s violent past scares her. The memory of his fist tightly wrapped around her hair even more so, but not as much as the fact that if he were to show up at her door right now, she’d jump into his arms almost immediately.

What the fuck is wrong with her?

How can she have the sweetest, kindest boy at her disposal and still pine for the one that’s most likely to blow her entire life to fucking smithereens?

Is Rafe’s craziness that contagious?

Has she too gone completely and utterly insane?

“Speak of the devil.” The words leave her mouth through a long, tired sigh; the bright screen of her phone illuminating her face and half the room before she tosses it back on the bed.

“You gonna reply?” Cleo looks at her expectantly.

Leni shakes her head, but her fingers itch. Every single atom in her body is screaming at her to text him back. Tell him about the awful day she’s had and let him take her out on his boat and do everything in his power to make her good.

Make her feel real good.

With bated breath she waits for Cleo to go to the bathroom.

Then, she grabs her phone.

The sound of a flushing toilet has Leni rushing back on her feet and swiftly pulling her pajama pants back on. Her heart is racing, underwear practically dripping with desire and she knows she’s asked herself the same question plenty of times before but what the fuck is wrong with her?

Talking to Rafe.

Flirting with Rafe.

Sending him those kinds of photos.

Now she knows for a fact that his craziness is contagious because what else would be making her behave like this?

Her phone’s screen lights up - his name once again popping up next to a needy text and thank god for Cleo because she would’ve done something stupid again. She would’ve actually listened to him; made up some elaborate excuse or in this case, just told her friend the truth and gotten herself at Tannyhill as fast as possible. Shamelessly she would’ve let him strip her; kiss every achingly desperate part of her body and finally -finally!- get what she came for: her long awaited and well deserved birthday present.

Leni swallows.

Throws her phone to the side for the millionth time tonight and lays her head back on the pillow.

“I’m gonna tell you something, but you gotta promise not to tell anyone.” She says suddenly, her voice quieter than a whisper.

Cleo groans, “Again with the threats?”

“No. No threats this time. I promise.” She chuckles, “My stay here runs out on August 31st. The next day I’m supposed to be out of this room by twelve. And… I’ve been thinking about… leaving this place altogether.”

Cleo’s brows furrow. “This place? What do you mean, this place? Like the island or? (“The island.”) What about your gap year?”

“I’m still gonna do it just… not here.” Leni sighs, her eyes suddenly prickling with tears, “Things are so… different now. Before Ward died, Sarah and I… we had plans. We were gonna share an apartment together. Work a silly breezy job at some lala boutique and spend our weekends sunbathing by her pool.” She smiles, but that doesn’t stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks. “Now I barely even see her. I’m constantly at The Wreck, all my clothes smell like burnt food and I’m barely even making any money! Not to mention-”

Rafe.

It’s not what she wants to say.

At least not originally, but her mind has already gone there and before she knows it, the rest of her senses have been completely clouded with images of his stupid smirk and those unforgettable stormy blues.

Leni swallows.

This stupid crush she has on him - it really is going to drive her insane. Never in her life has a person ever made her feel like this; made her heart feel like it’s going to explode, crack her chest wide open and leave her body in shambles. The thought of him makes her feel dizzy. The thought of him touching her, devouring her - sends her into oblivion.

It’s embarrassing just how bad she wants him.

How bad she wants to be with him.

Wake right next to him.

Feel the warmth of his body on the other side of her bed.

Another set of tears fall down her cheeks.

Fuck.

She needs to leave.

She needs to leave this fucking island before her heart is still capable of holding onto its pieces.

“Does Sarah know about this?”

Leni’s heart skips a beat.

She can’t imagine the way her best friend would react if she ever finds out about all the feelings Leni has for Rafe.

Would she be mad?

Confused?

Disappointed?

All of the above?

“I haven’t told her yet. But… I’m going to. I just need to make my decision first.”

Cleo nods, taking her hands into her own and gently squeezing them, “Well, whatever you decide to do… I’m here. Always.”

PREVIOUS CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

#rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron #rafe obx #rafe outer banks #rafe cameron smau #rafe cameron x oc #obx fanfiction #original character #a case of limerence #rafe fic #outerbanks rafe #rafe imagine #rafe fanfiction #rafe angst #obx rafe cameron #rafe cameron fic #rafe x oc

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bearr02 · 2 years ago

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Limerence |JJK - Teaser|

Limerence - The state of being infatuated or obsessed with someone.

Pairing: mafia boss!Jungkook x f!reader

Teaser warnings: angsty, Jungkook’s being kind of an ass

Summary: You never thought you would be tied up with the mafia, your life having been boring and the same. However, when a god of a man walks into the cafe you work at, you want to catch his attention in hopes you won’t feel so lonely anymore. Two thoughts that don’t cross your mind, one, that the stranger has been observing you for the past couple months, two, that he’s one of the biggest mafia bosses in all of Korea, deciding both of you that you will be his wife.

Genre: angst, non-idol au, yandere!Jungkook, smut..

Word count: 426

A/n: ik this is short, but I think it’s a decently good teaser and I’m really excited to put this out there, I probably won’t update too terribly often, considering my other series’, safe and sound being my main which will be the most updated, but like I really wanted to do this :)

This will, of course, be in a chapter most likely later on in this series, after they start dating and Y/n moves in with JK, so kinda just a sneak peak on what it’ll be like later :)

“I’m..I’m pregnant.” You whisper, looking at your hands as you nervously play with them. “You’re what?” Jungkook’s cold voice rings in the air. “You said you were on the pill.” Jungkook says, his chair screeching as he pushes it back and stands. You flinch at the sound, keeping your eyes trained on your hands.

Jungkook’s tattooed hand makes its way into your hair, fingers curling around the strands before he yanks you up by your hair. “Ah!” You whimper, fingers curling around Jungkook’s arm. “How are you pregnant, if you’re on. The fucking. Pill?” He asks, fingers tightening on your hair when your eyes squeeze shut. “I-I ran out.” You whimper out, looking at Jungkook through teary eyes. “You ran out?” He asks, laughing. “Why didn’t you fucking tell me?” He asks, slamming you against a nearby wall. “I tried!” You yell, fighting against him.

Jungkook frowns, his free hand coming up to your throat, fingers curling tightly around your neck. You gasp for air, brows furrowing at the lack of it. “Do not fucking raise your voice at me.” He growls, face coming closer to yours. You attempt to say sorry, your lips only moving as nothing comes out because of Jungkook’s hold on your neck. “I’m getting you abortion pills.” He says, removing his hands from you before walking away.

You fall to the floor, gasping for air. “I..wanna..keep it.” You gasp out hoarsely, a hand resting against your throat. “You what?” Jungkook asks, voice dangerously low as he walks back towards you. “I wanna keep it.” You say, louder this time. “We’re not gonna fucking keep it.” Jungkook says, standing beside your hunched over frame. “Then I am.” You say.

Jungkook scoffs, “And how the fuck are you gonna do that? I can just kill it when you’re sleeping.” He says, crouching beside you. “Then I’ll run away.” You say, looking up at Jungkook. His eyes darken, a frightening frown pulling at his lips.

Then he’s lifting you up by your hair, dragging you down the hall to your shared room. “Let me go!” You beg, back burning from the carpet where your shirt has ridden up. “Clearly you need to learn a thing or two about trying to leave me.” Jungkook says. Your heart sinks, clawing at his arm to no avail. “Please.” You say, a sob slipping past your lips as he opens the door. “Please!” You beg, louder.

“I need to get you back in check, baby. I’m in charge and you’re not. You never will be.”

A/n: I hope y’all like this, I honestly am really excited for this

Permanent taglist (open):

@viankiss @lizzymizzy-blogg @teddymoon06 @rln-byg @skyys-universe

Series taglist (open):

#Jungkook #jungkook x reader #yandere!jungkook #controlling!jungkook #BTS

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phanfictioncatalogue · 4 months ago

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Monthly Follower Recs

Monthly follower recommendations for the month of December 2024

blown again into instant flame (ao3) - jonsaremembers

Summary: Dan reappears in the corner of Phil’s vision, wearing the green suit.

I’m fucked, is all Phil can think.

Because Dan is awfully fit for someone stuffed bodily into a green morph suit. Even the way the hood squashes his curls down and out over his forehead is kind of adorable.

decaf coffee (ao3) - ShiwiSins (IetjeSiobhan)

Summary: Dan doesn’t know this is a thing they’ll be doing today until Phil is already naked on the bed, looking up at him with wide eyes, and he thinks, almost frantically, I want to put a baby in him.

Delicate (ao3) - easybubbyy

Summary: Phil reveals a hidden desire to be treated more femininely by Dan, particularly drawn to Dan's masculinity and how he looks in sleeveless shirts. Dan indulges Phil's desires, leading to a passionate evening of trust, affection, and deep connection.

Holding On For Just Tonight (ao3) - definitelynotczargasm

Summary: The night before Dan leaves for the American leg of WAD, he suffers a little crisis of faith. As always, Phil is there to help him through it.

i'd do me (ao3) - megiaolf

Summary: Dan is bored and comes across some saucy polaroids.

Impressions (ao3) - ottertrashpalace

Summary: Art museum guard who knows obsessive amounts about art history x nepo baby curator who has never read a book but keeps knocking it out of the park on vibes alone

Interrupted By Sirens (ao3) - SecretLlama_22

Summary: Dan is part of a mission leaving earth with destination of some far away galaxy. He doesn't mind really, leaving earth and all his friends behin. It's his job and he's happy to do it.

But one day they pass an inhabited asteroid field and the inhabitants cause a little trouble in his relationship to his fellow crew member Phil Lester. And, why did this space siren turn into HIM trying to seduce Phil?

Limerence (ao3) - cherryheartz

Summary: Limerence [ li-mer-uhns] noun

1 the state of being obsessively infatuated with someone, usually accompanied by delusions of or a desire for an intense romantic relationship with that person…

Phil Lester is popular. But Dan Howell is not. Dan Howell likes Phil Lester's raven colored hair and ice blue eyes. But so does someone else…

Love Comes Without a Warning (ao3) - beaniebopbaby

Summary: Phil Lester wanted nothing more than to find his soulmate, his other half.

Dan Howell could not care less about finding his.

of fated encounters and hand-made soulmates (ao3) - ShiwiSins (IetjeSiobhan)

Summary: He’s smiling at Phil, like this entire embarrassing scene is just the opening meet-cute of a low quality rom-com, and Dan dislikes him immediately.

Or: They keep running into the same guy. Phil thinks it's fate. Dan thinks he'd like to see him piss off.

our lips must always be sealed (ao3) - uhmyeah

Summary: dan and phil have silly tour sex

santa baby (ao3) - ShiwiSins (IetjeSiobhan)

Summary: “Tell me,” Dan purrs, “have you been nice or naughty this year?”

Or: Dan dresses up in a sexy Santa outfit.

Soccer Dads (ao3) - phantropolis

Summary: Dan accompanies Phil to their son’s soccer practice for the first time, only to discover that the soccer mums flirt with a very oblivious Phil in very obvious ways. Featuring jealous!Dan and their son, Jack, who is a surprisingly talented player.

the metaphors of desire (ao3) - cityofphanchester

Summary: The elbow of Dan’s jacket is smooth leather, stitched on, an unexpected contrast from the woolly fabric around it. His mouth is soft and his body is warm and Phil breaks away with a choked gasp of air.

“Shit,” Dan says, and his big warm hand drops away from Phil’s jaw, and he’s gone.

(in which they're both english professors)

The Nightmare of Chemistry (ao3) - Merrydith

Summary: Dan and Phil have amazing chemistry. They've built their entire lives around their dynamic. But Dan is lonely and decides to start dating to fill the desire in his heart - but everyone he brings home is too intimidated by Dan and Phil's connection. One day, Phil unknowingly gives him an idea that could change the game. Will Dan finally find someone comfortable enough to compete with what Dan and Phil have? Or will Dan have to realize that maybe what he has been looking for was in front of him the entire time?

The Very Thought of You (ao3) - thatgeekygirl13

Summary: His fingers whizzed across the black and white keys of the old piano. He smiled while sweat dripped down his brow. Dan had always felt like the piano was just an extension of himself, the music becoming a part of him.

The crowd clapped viciously as the final song came to a close. Dan smiled and looked up over the piano, glancing across the crowd. Then, right in the back corner, his gaze stopped on a man he didn’t recognize.

1940s AU where Dan Howell is a struggling, but talented pianist and Phil is a literature/writing/linguistics professor and they meet by chance at a hidden gay bar and really uhh hit it off idk I'm still writing it

#phanfictioncatalogue #phan #phanfic #phanfiction #dan and phil #fic recs #masterlists #followerrecs

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nadvs · 13 days ago

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Ok, part 6 of Power Play is officially my favorite!!! I love that you've given us Rafe's POV in this story because you don't see it often. The fact that he's pining over a girl with what he thinks is unrequited love is on point to what all girls feel and I love that we finally see it from a male perspective. Because god forbid they ever tell us their feelings until it's too late.

I love everything about Rafe's emotions and feelings in this chapter because he finally said "Fuck it, I like her!", but is going through the agony of not being sure how she feels about him, that it's still all an act, that he already found the girl of his dreams even when she annoyed him in the beginning. I'm pretty sure he's already in love with her. I know he side that he needs to slow down and that it can't possibly be love, but dude, your actions & feelings say otherwise!!! Like why the fuck are you going to beat up her classmates for annoying her & not doing the assignment if you aren't in love with her???? You're in love, Rafe Cameron!!!!

I love Home Before Dark, but I think Power Play is my new favorite.

And kudos to Tutor Reader for finally being able to slowly move on from Beck. He may be a good guy, but like you said, Reader being with someone else shouldn't be Beck's wake up call to realize he has feelings for her.

Love your work!!!!

omg love love love this ask 😭 thank you so much!! i really enjoy getting a male pov in a romance story, esp when he’s brooding and down bad. when i’m reading dual pov novels and her chapter is all like “he’s cute and i might have a crush” and then his chapter is all like “i’d die for her”?? yeah that’s my abso favoriteee 🙂‍↕️ i really wanted to give off the ‘he falls first and harder’ vibe with this fic!!

hehe yesss i see rafe’s character as so intense and passionate and i imagine him falling in love very hard. he doesn’t do ‘i like her’ for very long. once he gets to know a girl who challenges him in new ways and keeps him in line… it’s over, the man is in love 👀

thank you!! infatuation/limerence can be painful but i wanted to give her a satisfying progression of falling out of love with beck and realizing he’s not as amazing as she thought he was. i rly appreciate your support. your review was so nice to read 🥹

#ask

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asirensrage · 1 year ago

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Limerence

Title: Limerence

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers

Rating: T?

Pairing: Haitani Rindou x Unnamed!Undescribed!FemaleOC

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: Swearing. Slight obsession. A little stalking. Voyerism? Unbeta'd

Summary: It feels like forever since he’s seen her like this. Maybe that’s because of juvie but…he’s missed it. He doesn’t even know her name.

Notes: This is the cutest thing I've written in a long time. I hope you enjoy it. I did. It's from his pov. Please let me know what you think.

TR masterlist

“You staring at her again?”

“Fuck off,” he says, not looking back towards his brother. He’s leaning against the window slightly, gaze soft as he watches her in her apartment. They’ve lived across from each other for years. He can hear the soft thump of the bass of the music she’s blasting. It’s not loud enough for him to make out what song it is, but she’s jumping around and dancing, singing along as she cooks. It feels like forever since he’s seen her like this. Maybe that’s because of juvie but…he’s missed it. He doesn’t even know her name.

His brother leans in, face next to his, looking to where his gaze is lingering. “She’s still cute. You think she knows she has a stalker?”

Rindou shoves Ran away. “Fuck off,” he snarls. “I’m not a stalker.”

“No? You’ve been obsessed with her since you first noticed her.”

He tries not to flush in embarrassment. Of course Ran knew that. His brother knew everything that went on in Rindou’s life and it was both amazing and awful. The two of them did everything together but this…this was something that was only Rindou’s. At least it was supposed to be.

Rindou gets up, moving away from the window, despite the fact that his mind is still on the way she moves so freely. Her blinds are always open during the day as if she has no care that people can see her. He wants to know what clubs she goes to, if he can find a way to meet her naturally on the street. He wants to feel her pressed up against him, smiling at him the way she does as her pet. He wants to know what she’s like in real life…if she’s as outgoing in real life as she looks.

Ran laughs. “Why don’t you just go knock on her door? Tell her you’ve been watching her and think she’s cute!” Rindou ignores him and leaves, slamming the door shut behind him.

He’ll never admit how much he thinks about her. Especially not to Ran. He does though. He daydreams sometimes about what it would be like to be in her apartment with her, to see her dancing in his kitchen as he plays music for her. He thinks about taking the headphones off from around his neck, placing them gently on her head and playing one of the songs he’s created. He wants to know what she thinks about it, if she likes it, if it would make her move…

🎧

So when he does finally, literally, run into her outside on the street, completely by accident, Rindou is struck silent when she grins at him and apologizes. She raises her eyebrows, her smile growing a little wider as she looks at him.

“You alright?”

“What? Yeah!” he says, head shaking slightly as he tries to pull himself out of the shock. His cheeks heat as he realizes he’s making a fool out of himself in front of her. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” he tries to recover. He grins at her, “You good?”

She looks at him like she’s aware that he’s trying to play it off. “I’m good,” she agrees.

He clears his throat and looks away, wanting to run a hand through his hair. He stops himself though, shoving his hands in his pockets and grateful that Ran isn’t with him to see this train wreck. “You uh…live near?” he asks, lying through his teeth like he doesn’t know exactly where she lives. Fuck. Ran is right. He is a stalker.

“Yeah,” she says but doesn’t elaborate. He can’t blame her.

“Me too. My brother and I live in that building over there.” He points it out, partly to reassure her he’s not some random creep and partly because he wants her to know. He wants her to be as curious about him as he is about her.

“Oh!” She blinks in surprise. “Really? How long have you lived there? Did you just move in?”

“Ah…” he’s pretty sure she breaks his heart with that question. “No, we…we’ve lived there for years.”

“Really? I’ve never seen you around before,” another strike to his heart. “-nd I usually see a lot, I would’ve noticed you-” She pauses before she covers her mouth like she didn’t intend to say it out loud.” Never mind. His heart might just be repaired. “I mean, walking my dog,” she says quickly. “I usually see a lot of people when I take him out.”

“I would’ve noticed you too,” he says, grinning a little wider.

She bites her lip at that, looking away. Fuck, she’s cute. Cuter in person too. Especially when she’s clearly flustered by him.

“I’m Rindou,” he introduces himself. He doesn’t know if she knows what he and his brother do, or why they’re famous in Roppongi, but he doesn’t want her scared off before he gets the chance to know her.

“Hi Rindou,” she says, voice a little softer, a little sweeter. It’s enough to make his stomach clench.

“Hi,” he repeats, not looking away. He just wants to lean down, to see if she tastes as good as he imagined considering how much fucking better she was in person already.

She introduces herself, saying a name that he repeats twice just to make sure he memorizes it and to cherish the way it sounds and feels when he says it. If he thinks about how good their names sound together, or how good hers sounds with his last name…he’d rather die before he admits that to anyone.

“You just coming home?” he asks, motioning to the cloth grocery bag she’s carrying.

“Yeah, just did some shopping. You?”

“Nah, heading to the gym. You…can I take you out sometime?” He asks before he loses his nerve and before his brother can show up and whisk her away without even meaning to. Is she single? He never considered her not being so, but it’s fine. If she isn’t he can deal with that. One way or another.

She blinks at him in surprise before she tries to stop herself from smiling. He grins at the tension in her cheeks and how she’s dragging her teeth over her bottom lip again. He really wants to taste it.

“Um, yeah,” she says, finally giving into the smile. It’s like being faced with the sun. Bright and warm and renewing. She nods as if to reaffirm her choice. “Yeah,” she repeats. “Maybe we can exchange numbers first? Then plan something? I wouldn’t want to keep you from the gym.”

“It can wait,” he says, digging out his phone from his pocket. He unlocks it, opens his contacts and hands it over to her.

She takes it and his fingers slide against hers as she does. They feel soft and warm, and he has to shove down the automatic thought of how soft her skin probably is in other areas….or how her hands would feel touching him.

He watches as she types in her name and her number. She calls herself before she hands it back, refusing the call on her own phone as he takes it.

“Now I have your number too,” she smiles softly.

“Good,” he says, meaning it completely. “Good.” He stares at her for a moment, wishing he could say more but he knows he can’t. He doesn’t want to freak her out and he really, really, doesn’t want to ruin this. Not when he’s finally talking to her.

“Okay, Rindou, I…I should go in. Put this in the fridge.”

He takes a deep breath and nods. “Yeah, right. I should…I’m meeting a friend,” he says. “A guy friend. We work out together,” he explains quickly, not wanting her to get the wrong idea.

She giggles slightly at him and he tries to burn the memory of the sound into his brain. He wants to hear it again. He wants to hear every sound she makes. “Okay,” she says, grinning at him. “Text me when you have time.”

“I will,” he promises like he’s not going to have to quell the urge to message her immediately once they part ways. “Say hi to your dog for me.”

“I will,” she says, biting her lip again. She’s going to drive him crazy. He knows it. He’s going to fantasize about her lips and the way she might leave bite marks on him. Okay, he really needs to leave before he does something stupid.

“Okay,” he says because he doesn’t actually want to say goodbye.

She grins again. “Bye Rindou.”

“Bye,” he sighs before he realizes what he’s done. He clears his throat and looks away, cheeks heating in embarrassment again. He grins sheepishly and rubs the back of his neck. She laughs lightly before turning and leaving. Rindou watches her go before he has to shake the thoughts out of his head and he forces himself to head to the gym. He needs the distraction now…if only to keep himself from gloating that he has a date with his dream girl. He can’t wait.

everything taglist: @raith-way @zeleniafic @veetlegeuse @chickensarentcheap @residentdormouse @themaradwrites @kingsmakers @far-shores

also @sxrvivc who listens to me ramble about TR and all my writing for it lol

And the Network: @enchantedforest-network

#haitani rindou fic #haitani rindou x oc #fic: limerence #tokyo revengers fic #tr fic #rindou fluff #tokyo revengers fluff #rindou x oc #my writing

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jessthetea · 6 months ago

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This is gonna be long & my opinion. I think Jess realized that she fucked up when she posted that tribute to Liam (3 weeks late at that) & due to Jamie’s mother’s comment and Jamie’s post the morning after she can’t delete it because if she did, it will look more suspicious. I believe she exposed herself, & even more exposed the true relationship that she & Jamie were supposed to be before she exposed them. She was so engulfed in craving attention on her connection to Liam from the fact that she was not getting any engagement on her page & was becoming irrelevant because Jamie was not giving her content anymore (so she took that hook-up that she had with Liam and twisted it to her narrative to get attention) that she did stupidly forget that Jamie’s mom & brother was following her & due to his mom being confused about her, her work & her connection to Liam, she exposed her true relationship with Jamie & his family. She basically told on herself that Jamie doesn’t have her around his family because what committed & loving relationship where your boyfriend‘s family hardly knows who you are or what your job is? I’ve seen Jamie’s other exes, & his parents/brother knew who his girlfriends were so it’s pretty odd that they hardly know who Jess is, that’s red flag #1. Red flag #2, to me leads to signs that she wasn’t supposed to be a serious long-term girlfriend, #1 Like I just said his family hardly knows who she is, another one, in the three years they have been dating to my knowledge, when did Jamie publicly say that he loves Jess? He may have mentioned her in conventions & said, bless her for putting up with him (which sounds like something she would say to him for him to say that because he never said that with his other exes from what I remember until he ended up with her) but has failed to say the L word about her? Jess stans would have an excuse & say he doesn’t have to say it out loud when he can say it in private, but he has publicly said he loves his ex-girlfriends on social media when he was with them, so again odd that he never said he loves Jess & if he’s not able to say in public 50-50 chance he’s even saying it to her in private. I think they weren’t a couple when they were together in 2021. I believe it was a fling to where she was a distraction & that he had limerence for her to get over his break up with Ruby, so it wasn’t supposed to go public & then once he was over his break up & whatever they agreed on he more likely was gonna break it off, Jess may have agreed to it, knowing that Jamie didn’t want anything serious with her & was even lucky to get his attention to get in bed with her so she definitely exposed them on the beach, so Jamie’s back was against the wall so where he couldn’t help but confirm that they were together even though it was months later. No committed boyfriend will wait months to confirm or claim you. (not saying that Jamie was just using her to make him seem bad. I’m sure that he thought he liked her but it wasn't anything serious). Like the first year that they were publicly dating it does seem like they were happy but was probably due to Jamie trying to make it work & thought that he liked her but as you can see it went downhill pretty fast. Also, the fact that she was stalking him since 2015 & even followed his girlfriend at the time Matilda until they broke up in 2018? She planned all of this. So I feel like they weren’t even a couple & if they were, it wasn’t supposed to be long-term until Jess exposed it having Jamie stuck & now Jamie probably for a very long while sees her true colors now, knowing what a narcissist she is & that tweet that he posted a day after is proof in my eyes that he dislikes her now & is done with her. So she stupidly exposed herself even more, & Jamie put salt in the wound. It also tells me that if he was able to passive-aggressively throw shade at her there is something that’s keeping him from officially leaving her. How can you stay with someone that you don’t acknowledge or be around them & throw shade at?

All solid points, and every bit of it is loaded with red flags. Whatever’s keeping Jamie from making a clean break with her is hard to pinpoint, but it seems like the chaos Jess Moloney has stirred up has dragged him in too. I suspect it’s tied to her debt (which has been confirmed by official documents), and as long as he’s tied to that, he might feel he can’t fully walk away. Whatever the case, hopefully it wraps up soon. His birthday should be a telling sign—if she’s not with him then, it’s likely safe to assume they’re done.

#jess moloney #jamie bower #jamie campbell bower #asks

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gustavgiles · 1 year ago

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Here's a little Vikdecai fic that I hope you enjoy! It's a Viktor-focused story that I wrote 'cus I wanted to see them make up and kiss. Planning a Mordecai-focused followup that may or may not be spicy!

Some Interesting Viktor Facts/Theories that got into my brain doing a Viktor-focused read of the comic while writing this:

Lackadaisy Anodyne provides a wealth of information about Viktor's family:

He gets letters from his daughter, but *only* his daughter, not from his wife. My read on this is that his wife broke things off with him, rather than the other way around (like Viktor telling them to leave because he wanted them safe or something); that seems like the more likely situation if she's no-contact with Viktor.

His daughter sends him 1-2 letters a year; assuming that she started writing him when he split up with his wife, then that places the breakup at just before 1921 or 1922, depending on what year you think the half-hidden postcard is from.

The Palmer Raid precipitating the riot where Viktor lost his eye, then was arrested and bailed out by Atlas happened January 1920, which about lines up with the time he split up with his wife. I think Viktor going to prison and falling in with Atlas was the inciting incident for Viktor's wife leaving him; my headcanon is she didn't feel like he was able to provide for his family anymore, and was dragging them into a dangerous criminal element.

VIKTOR HAS A CONFIRMED THIRD UNKNOWN PERSON IN HIS PAST THAT I NEVER SEE ANYBODY TALK ABOUT! Alena (his daughter)'s 1926 letter to him reads: "Dear Father, Hello! This is my photo from the start of the school year. I wear my hair much shorter now, and so I wanted to show you. I can't believe it's already the holiday season! Will you write back? You don't have to write in English if you don't like to. I can ask Mama or Tala to translate. Merry Christmas, Alena" WHO THE HELL IS TALA?? Did Viktor's wife re-marry? Did Viktor emigrate with someone else? Is it just some random person in the Slovak community that Alena knows? QUESTIONS. (also this implies that Alena doesn't speak Slovak. I wonder if that hurts Viktor a little.)

Viktor HASN'T OPENED ANY OF ALENA'S LETTERS UNTIL NOW. Why? Does it hurt too much? Can he not find the time? It can't be that he doesn't care about his daughter because he saves the picture of her. STOP PUSHING PEOPLE AWAY VIKTOR, LET OTHER PEOPLE MAKE YOU HAPPY

Viktor's wearing what appeared to be Allied gear in Lackadaisy Scrapbook. Slovakians would have been part of the Central Powers, so it seems that Viktor emigrated (with his wife?) to America far before the events of Lackadaisy, and went to war against his own country. He probably had a more difficult time in the war than most people.

Viktor's birthday is Apr. 16, also from Lackadaisy Scrapbook. Maybe some day in the future Mordecai will look up his birthday via his arrest records and make him a little cake???

Tracey describes younger Viktor as "robust and amorous" in an old Q&A which certainly does not describe the current Viktor. He must've been happy and carefree at some point :(.

Tracey also talks a little about how she sees Viktor in another Q&A: "sometimes, drawing snarly Viktor expressions is my favorite thing because I’m thinking of Viktor’s superficially powerful, animal anger and how it only ever ricochets back, making him smaller by increments…" Which is a description that just really resonates with me. He wasn't *always* this sad and angry and lonely, the world's just chipped away at him over the years until he's a raw bundle of nerves. CAN YOU TELL I'M OBSESSED WITH VIKTOR I CAN FIX HIM

#vikdecai #viktor vasko #lackadaisy

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strawberrystepmom · 3 months ago

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I would love to receive a zodiac reading from you, Angel! (If possible of course)✨ this is such a cool event! I am feeling spicy, so a steamy request it is! My signs are:

Gemini moon

Scorpio sun

Leo mars

Neptune Capricorn

Scorpio Venus

Thank you so much for hosting this! ❤️❤️

i would love to!! i'm so happy people are asking questions, honestly. they're taking me a bit to get through because i wanna really make them special and thankfully everyone has been pretty nice about that lol

So, I’ve said it a few other times but it bears repeating - what we look for with respect to sexuality/sexiness in astrology is really just how you communicate your outward desire. We also look at how this plays into your willingness to try new things, your appetites, your desires even the ones you keep secret.

That being said my eyes honed in on that Scorpio Venus/Leo Mars combination very quickly because it’s an interesting combination of light and dark, so to speak, to have to balance within yourself.

For your Scorpio Venus, sex is about emotion even more than it is physicality. I’m not saying this is true 100% of the time or that someone with a Scorpio placement here wouldn’t hook up with people for fun but I will say those are experiences they’re seeking to intentionally keep shallow when they happen. These people will not be given the capacity and depth of a Scorpio’s care, love, or freak. This is a placement that finds itself capable of being deeply infatuated with people so it keeps its cards close to its chest. It’s safer to keep to yourself, to keep people guessing, to not give them too much so you can maintain control of the situation.

Then that godforsaken Leo Mars comes in.

I too am a Leo Mars with a prominent Scorpio placement so can relate to the struggle of not wanting to be perceived (Scorpio’s desire) vs wanting to be Viewed and Adored (Leo’s desire). People get weird about it when you say that Leo’s want to be adored - well they do. Whether you like it or not, one of the core principles Leo goes by in life is “I am here and you will experience me.” That doesn’t automatically translate to extroverted or even extra in general but it creates a person who likes to draw eyes. Who likes to be, well, viewed. Coveted. Adored. Lusted after, so on and so forth.

For Scorpio this is a nightmare scenario because not only is it probably experiencing limerence over a person you just met at a bar, Leo is encouraging it. You’re smacking your lips together and smiling at this person in that delectably coy way Leo does. You may as well be licking your chops. Your body and your head are telling you let’s go and your head is saying what in fresh hell is wrong with you, stop this now.

This is the Scorpio-Leo struggle.

Thankfully you have some stellar supportive placements to keep Scorpio from making you too intense. Intense in bed, with the right person, oh absolutely - they are about to be given the blessing of a lifetime but intense in general? Not really.

Actually let’s delve into that for a sec then move on. Scorpio (of which you are both Sun and Venus) loves the taboo aspects of the world. When I think of the most true sense of BDSM, the whips and the chains and the erotic and the control and the leather, I think of Scorpio and people are gonna be like stereotypes!! BUT….some stereotypes exist for a reason. Scorpios tend to excel in an element where they can have a lot of control over things. Not quite as much as, say, Virgo or Capricorn, but they love to call the shots. To be the director. That isn’t a commentary on dynamics or anything of the sort, I’m just suggesting that if you don’t already call some of the shots - try it. This doesn’t mean domming someone by next Tuesday but suggest a scene and describe exactly how you want it to be. See what comes out of it because you may be surprised just how free you feel when you know just what to expect.

Okay, moving on.

Gemini Moon softens the moodiness of Scorpio a lot because it’s so bubbly and Leo will “it’s not that deep” you off a cliff if it must. Gemini, and Moon especially, can also make a person experimental. It’s inherently curious. It wants to know how everything works. This is true of sex as well although that sensitive, deep, introspective Scorpio likely encourages you to save most of the experimentation for someone you really trust and have a deep bond with. That doesn’t mean not having sex just that you aren’t gonna be calling just any old guy on the street on the street daddy.

#answered #an astrological event #hoestradamus

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blueskiestarot · 9 months ago

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Hello blueskies tarot! First of all I would like to say that I really love your readings and I’m finally caught up on all of them heheh. 🌷🌷

But recently I’ve been having a really strange experience and I would love to share my story and hopefully get insight or an answer from someone reading this and to see if someone had the same experience.

I’ve been having a huge crushes and infatuation on someone who was inaccessible to me, but the weird thing I always kept receiving signs and messages that this person is for me and that they will make a move towards me really soon, like for example in one of your readings it said they are coming towards me and the description fit this person exactly along with other signs like repeating numbers.

This is not the first time this thing happens to me, it happened before where I would start receiving many signs related to a certain person telling me that they are my soulmate and then after a few weeks a revelation happens and I figure out that this person is not for me. This has made me feel very hopeless, stuck and delusional. I felt like I can’t trust the universe and that all the guidance I received from spirit is deceptive. Honestly I feel like there’s something wrong. Why does spirit keep showing me signs and syncs that lead to a dead end? It happened several times before, where I discovered the truth of the situation and then the signs stopped then kept coming back referring to another. Is spirit leading me on?

This has been wrecking my mental health really bad, I’m starting to feel hopeless because I just keep engaging in limerence.

The last time this happened I frantically opened an online tarot deck and picked a random spread I got a card, but I can’t remember which one that said what seems to be random might not be random at all.

The only conclusions I can come up with are either that I’m interpreting the signs wrong, or I’m engaging with a deceptive spirit that’s pretending to be my spirit guide or in a false matrix.

However I really doubt that I’m interpreting the signs wrong because all of them have keys that point to something specific about each person.

Thank you if you’ve read this far. I really don’t know what to do, I feel so hopeless about my love life, and I’m scared to believe any signs that I receive from the universe :(

Hi, love!

I'm sorry you're going through that and feeling confused. I hope I can help! Just know that these thoughts are purely my opinion and my own experiences. ♥️

So, first of all, when you start to feel like your mental health is being negatively impacted by readings, that is a clear sign that it's time to take a break from reading and/or watching readings for awhile. I would suggest taking a week off and trying to avoid pick a pile readings as much as possible. You can always come back to them after that and see if things have changed or if you are in a better head space. Never consume media that is making you feel bad in any way.

Secondly, it's SOOOOOO important to use your discernment when reading pick a pile readings. These readings rely heavily on your intuition because you're picking the pile you are intuitively drawn to. So, if you know that a connection with someone is not possible, I think it would be safe to say that the reading is not for you even if it sounds like the person you are connecting with. Keep in mind that many people pick the same pile as you. So, they may be dealing with similar people. Just think of how many people you've met that could be described using the same description, you know? So, just be super weary of if it really sounds like that person or if it's a general description and you just want it to be them. Again, it's all about being self-aware and using your discernment.

It's also important to note when you are infatuated with someone as opposed to having a real connection with them. If it's someone you've never talked to and the reading says they are thinking of marriage with you, that's a clear indicator that the reading is not for you. So, use your judgement to know when messages are for based on what is going on in your connection. One of my favorite readers on YouTube is Shadow Play Tarot and she always includes a "delulu checkpoint" in her videos when she says something that she feels may mislead someone into giving into delusions. It's just a checkpoint to sort of bring you back to reality and check in with your current situation so that you can ask yourself "does this really resonate with me or do I just want it to?" Readings should never tell you how you feel or what's going to happen. They should simply confirm what you already know and/or feel. So, for example, if I had a connection that seemed to have ended on bad terms and the other person seemed to hate me but a reading said that they were going to come back in a week, I would ask myself "is that really true based on what I know to be true?" I hope that makes sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you should see evidence in real life of what the reading is trying to tell you or it should confirm your intuitive feelings.

Always check in with yourself and observe how a reading is making you feel. If it's triggering or doesn't confirm what you already feel, then it's not for you.

Also, detachment is your friend. Sometimes we're too close to the situation and can't see what is actually going on. I feel like we can manifest what could be mistaken as signs from spirit by thinking heavily of someone. So, if you are constantly thinking of a person and are completely lost in the sauce when it comes to them, you could potentially manifest seeing signs of them in your outside world. Try detaching from them for a bit by distracting yourself with other things. If you're still seeing the signs, then they are likely from Spirit.

Lastly, in my own opinion, I do not think that Spirit is above lying to us in order for us to learn a lesson or to get us to do what they want. So, if you are meant to learn a specific lesson from someone but they aren't "your person", I fully believe they will lie and trick you into believing that person is for you until you've learned that lesson. Same goes if someone IS for you. If you're too attached and f*cking up the connection by overthinking, being super fearful, or doubtful, they will trick you into believing you need to let it go in order to get you to detach so that your energy is not sabotaging things. So, my point is that Spirit can and will manipulate you into believing something so that they can guide you toward learning a specific lesson or toward doing a certain action. It's all done in the name of your highest good but that doesn't change that the fact that they are lying and manipulating you. It's not malicious at all. So, if you do feel like you are being lied to in a malicious way like there is a spirit posing as your spirit guide, make sure you are clearing the energy out of your space regularly and make sure you are protecting your energy as well.

I hope that helps somewhat! And if anyone else has any advice, that would so helpful! 🫶 Love, Tara

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hopesandmountains · 2 years ago

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So I still have limerent thoughts that occur and one important thing to recognize is that limerent thoughts are typically a coping mechanism when you feel overwhelmed.

Limerent thoughts are soothing, but if you recognize that you are having limerent thoughts, try to stop for a bit and monitor you mental state. Just take a breathe, put aside any limerent thoughts you have for the moment, and really just let yourself feel what you are currently feeling in the moment.

I typically have limerent thoughts when feeling overwhelmed, however it’s limerent thoughts are just a general escape for your current mental state and emotions, so try and take a second to see what is going on with you.

Personally, I have a troubled home life that there is no easy escape from, unprocessed trauma, and general unhappiness with life (that I’m typically in denial about).

So yeah I daydream, I fantasize, and I imagine a better life.

But there’s a certain point where I am just avoiding my current mental state and am just coping to get through the day. And there’s nothing wrong with that, but maybe there is when it happens a bit too frequently.

And it’s not like I wasn’t making steps towards making my life better. I was making progress in both my mental state and career, and the fantasizing wasn’t even the problem, it was just the overwhelm that made it really difficult to focus and complete even simple chores.

And that’s where I am at currently. I’ve been trying to work around the overwhelm and piling up mental health issues, but it’s at a point where I can’t avoid that mental state and still accomplish what I want to to live the life that I want.

Obviously moving out and having a safe space for me to go home to will help immensely, but I don’t think I should wait any longer to try and address my mental state.

And sometimes that just means escaping to the park or library. Volunteering helps to get away and have a group of people to talk to, and I had a club I was apart of (until I quit recently). Just finding ways of escaping a stressful environment does wonders, since as a kid I always felt trapped and stuck in the idea that I had to stay.

It’s liberating to realize that you can just leave when you feel that feeling of overwhelm and stress start to occur (just make sure you go to a safe place when feeling that way).

It’s also liberating to know that you can find ways of calming your mental state in healthy ways.

Meditating helps. Just being able to monitor your thoughts and give yourself guidance when you feel your emotions are getting out of hand.

Journaling works for the same reason. It helps you write out all of your thoughts (I like to draw them out) and it really helps you know what is going on mentally when you aren’t always just able to tell yourself what’s going on in your subconscious.

And really you just have to find what works for you. This post is really just about empowering you to at least try and make an effort to manage that feeling you have been avoiding.

For me it took a lot of trying and failing. And things were a bit more difficult at times. But you really have to see what works for you, and just starting to try and think about it will help you start to brainstorm and through time eventually work through what has been so difficult that you’ve been avoiding.

A lot of times that ties back to childhood trauma, and that’s never easy to resolve. For some people it may never be resolved. And I think everybody should work with a therapist or licensed practitioner if possible, but especially if you are someone who has PTSD or triggering events.

Because trying to face that on your own could lead to you being triggered and that could lead to spiraling or reliving something you are not ready for. I still think you should try and face what you’ve been avoiding, but with help and guidance. Talk to a therapist about what you are feeling and let them help.

#limerance #healing

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4urvalidation · 3 months ago

Text

A CASE OF LIMERENCE | Chapter Eleven

PREVIOUS CHAPTER | NEXT CHAPTER

A/N: Not to sound like an old white woman, but sincere apologies for having y'all wait this long for this chapter. I often struggle with writer's block (blame my perfectionist nature for that) and when you have grown adult business to take care of on the side, you have very little time to work on that. That being said, I worked really hard on this and the final product is well, something I can very happily say I am incredibly proud of. I love these assholes so fucking much like !!! They are driving me insane.

TW: The usual case of characters being horny and doing silly stupid things because of that, semi graphic sexual content, mentions of masturbation and unhinged sexual fantasies...

She leaves him on read.

Touches herself - mad and with vigor, almost until her hand falls off and then - when her mind is finally free from all those god fearing thoughts that single half naked photo of his produced - Leni decides to never think about Rafe again.

What she and JJ have is good.

Safe.

Simple.

Inevitable to end as soon as the summer comes to a close or once she boards the plane back home, but it’s not like her heart will eat itself out over it. Yes - she will be sad as the whole thing is bound to hurt, but it’s not like she will be losing the love of her life or something. Not that she is implying Rafe is the love of her life! But if he could make her feel like blossoming just by barely even touching her, Leni hates to think what would happen once he finally has her in his arms.

Leni stares at the message and then at Kie. Her friend is on the other side of the restaurant, casually slipping her phone in the pocket of her apron and moving on with her day as if she didn’t just leave the most passive aggressive text in the world.

What the fuck is her problem? It’s the middle of lunch hour; The Wreck is bustling with people and she could’ve just told her this fifteen minutes ago while they were both perched up on the bar, not working and stubbornly ignoring Mr. Carrera’s deathly glare. And sure - perhaps the only reason why Kie chose to say all of that in the group chat instead of Leni’s face could have something to do with her nosy dad being right there! But Leni’s intuition keeps telling her otherwise.

She keeps finding herself on the night of that bonfire. Kie’s electric blue bikini and the weight of her gaze as JJ lowered his lips closer and closer…

“Table four needs their bill!” Someone shouts from a distance, catching her attention but just barely. Her mind is still far too preoccupied with Kie - the seashell bracelets on her wrists, her effortless beauty, her small but intentional smiles, chipped rainbow colored nail polish, mismatched socks… “Table four!” The second time, the shouting manages to startle Leni right out of her thoughts. She turns, frantically throwing a glance at whoever just made that awful noise and almost instantly wishes for the ground to open and swallow her hole when she notices it’s been her boss all along.

Fuckfuckfuck.

She scrambles, her phone practically shoved in the pocket of her apron as she skips towards the now leaving couple. Her eyes meet the woman’s and the smile she gives Leni is one of those awkward, tight lipped ones. The tip they’ve left matches the energy. She stares at the crumpled two one dollar bills, seething. They spent nearly a hundred dollars on lunch and all they’ve given her is two fucking bucks?

What is it with these stingy Kooks?

She pockets the bills.

Sighs.

“JJ likes you.” Kie exclaims, her massive frown barely an inch away from Leni’s face. “And I know that you know so… that’s why I’m asking you to stop.”

“Stop what?”

“Leading him on!”

Leni blinks - not because she’s confused or taken aback by this ludicrous claim, but because she’s desperately trying to shake off the guilt. “But… I’m not.” Except she is. She is leading him on or at least was - horribly, greedily - and now that she’s been caught, all Leni wants to do is not only prove Kie wrong, but also make her regret for even thinking that in the first place.

“Yes, you are. He’s… he’s obsessed with you, y’know!? Day and night, all he talks about is you! Leni this, Leni that. Leni canceled on me again. Leni still hasn’t replied… We spent a whole fucking day on Mainland looking for that stupid book of yours!” Kie’s brows are furrowed, the corners of her lips comically perched downwards and she looks so young when she’s upset. Like a petulant child she blows her anger out through her nose and when she speaks again, her voice shakes a little, “Do you even like him?”

The question leaving Kie’s mouth doesn’t sound like one. It’s an accusation; a strict reminder of sorts that not only sends a shiver down Leni’s spine, but also makes her feel like some kind of fraud. And maybe she is. Maybe all this heartbreak and disappointment has hardened her; forced her to transform into some cold, heartless creature, but if that were to be true, why does that feeling still exist in her chest whenever he looks at her?

And there she goes again - thinking of someone else when her main priority should be JJ.

Sweet, simple and considerate JJ.

JJ who spent an entire day on Mainland - the only place on this earth that he loathes more than Figure Eight - so he can find a copy of the book she likes.

“Yes… I do.” Leni says quietly, her head slightly bowed in shame, but not enough in order to give Kie the satisfaction that maybe she might be onto something.

“Are you sure?” The words slice through Leni’s facade, forcing her to face her friend and the nasty glare she’s been giving her all along and she understands. She understands the overprotectiveness; the relentless need to stand up for the ones you love, but this is getting fucking ridiculous!

“Kiara, I am literally sleeping with him!” Leni blurts a little louder than supposed to and great! Now they have an audience - the group of leery frat boys sitting nearby have stopped their obnoxious chatter and are now goggling at them with expectant curiosity.

Kie on the other hand just stares at her and it’s so obvious. The whole reason why she is acting like JJ’s keeper isn’t because he’s got a frail baby bird of a heart. She’s fucking in love with him! Well - okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration; after all, Kie is still very much in love with Pope, but that doesn’t mean she’s stopped having feelings for JJ.

“You… you’re… but JJ… he didn’t say-”

“Yeah well, I know you’re close, but he’s allowed to have a personal life. Like - I’m sure you don’t go round telling him whenever you and Pope fuck. Or are you?” The tone of her voice is unexpectedly icy; almost identical to the one she not so long ago heard straight out of Tess’ lips and Leni loathes herself for it now.

Kie is supposed to be her friend; her girl. She gave her this job, held back her hair while she was throwing her guts out in a random bush behind the Chateau… but she also happens to be headstrong and smart and observant and incredibly possessive of the ones she loves.

Kind of, if not exactly like Leni.

At least now she knows JJ definitely has a type: feisty brunettes.

“You’re right.” Kie’s sigh echoes, “But I still think you’re leading him on. That being said - if you break his heart-”

“You’ll break my spine.”

“So you understand.”

“I do.” The corners of Leni’s lips perk up a little, a futile attempt at defusing the situation, “I also happened to have a JJ of my own.”

“Sarah.”

Leni nods.

The only difference being, she has never wanted to sleep with her best friend.

“Shitshitshit.” There’s coffee everywhere: on the counter, on the floor, on her apron, on her shoes… Hastily with the corner of her eye on the backdoor from which Mr. Carrera disappeared just moments before the grand disaster occurred, Leni wipes away the spillage. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me today.”

Kie follows quickly behind - a mop in one hand and three washcloths in the other, “Relax. You’re fine.”

Except no, she’s not.

Ever since she left JJ’s place this morning, Leni has been feeling like her head hasn’t been screwed on tight. She wishes she could blame it on the mind blowing sex, but she can’t. Not when her mind is busy trying to decide whether what they did last night was enjoyable or not. At least it was better than their first time.

The rush and nervousness was gone; he’d already seen her naked, touched and kissed her more than a few dozen times, but as she lay there on his twin bed - cramped and with JJ’s fingers frantically pumping in and and out of her - all Leni could do was close her eyes and pretend.

In her mind he was far more calculated with his movements; his eagerness felt through the way his lips moved across her skin; teeth raking against her utmost sensitive parts and his voice… God his voice. That deep, rumbling, almost demanding sound sent shivers down Leni’s spine as he whispered all the dirty, nasty things he wanted to do to her.

It’s bad.

Her crush on Rafe, the constant fantasizing, the way her brain keeps insinuating JJ is bad at sex… how horrible, how mean. Especially considering how she herself isn’t exactly this experienced sex goddess. But at least she knows what she likes. Unfortunately, her list doesn’t include any of the things sweet, caring, attentive JJ does to her.

“I’m gonna kill myself.” Leni says, a damp washcloth in hand and thoughts stuck somewhere between teaching JJ how to get her off and drowning herself in the gigantic coffee puddle under her feet.

“It’s just coffee, babe.”

“Yeah, I know it’s dumb coffee, but it’s like -” She sighs and it’s like a gust of wind has just left her body. “I’m having such a bad day.”

“And now it just got worse.” The sudden shift in Kie’s voice forces Leni to look up from the giant stain on her apron. There’s a large fake smile on her friend’s face, the kind that makes her look like she’s in pain. “Peep table four.”

Leni swallows.

On a chair facing her field of vision, sits Rafe. His perfectly tailored peach colored suit outlines every ridge and muscle on his body and he’s looking at her now - stormy blue eyes intensely pressed against her very own matching gaze.

Her body tenses up as that pesky brain of hers suddenly decides to conjure every single fantasy it managed to create over the past couple of days and now that she’s seeing him in the flesh and not through a picture on her phone, all those lustful thoughts start to make sense again.

She wants him.

Bad.

“Hey.” The sudden feeling of Kie’s fingertips against her forearm startles Leni. Their eyes meet and it’s kind of hard to believe that just minutes ago they were having a stupid fight about a stupid photo Leni mindlessly posted on her Instagram. “Take your break. I got this.”

“Oh no, don’t worry. It’s fine.” She smiles, shaking her head. “I can handle him.” With a slight tremble in her hands, Leni puts back her stained apron before approaching Rafe’s table.

It’s so stupid.

Having a crush.

Having a crush on Rafe.

Embarrassing and downright mortifying.

Especially when she is supposed to loathe him, not spend her nights fantasizing about all the different ways he can get in her pants.

“Elena.”

“Rafferty.”

Rafe takes a sharp intake of breath. “Didn’t know we were talking dirty.” The corners of his lips perk up just then, that signature smirk of his on full blast and Leni really doesn’t like the way it rattles the butterflies in the pit of her belly.

She rolls her eyes, ignoring him, “You ready to order yet?”

“Yeah.”

“Great. What are you having?”

“You.” Their eyes meet. The smirk on Rafe’s face has widened; practically transformed itself into an almost leering grin. That bastard, thinking he is so goddamn funny and he is. Her crush on him is so fucking pathetic, he could point towards a single breadcrumb and she’ll be in stitches almost immediately. “When’s your break?”

“In fifteen-”

“Take it now.” He says, interrupting her and she’s going to; something about that specific tone in his voice makes Leni want to do everything he tells her to, but the stubborn, disobedient part of her brain that shames every single emotion she has for him thinks otherwise. “Oh - and I’ll have the cobb salad with fries and a Coke. Please.”

Slightly annoyed, she nods curtly before lazily making her way back to the bar where Kie is waiting with the world’s most exasperated face. “What does he want?” She breathes through gritted teeth.

“A cobb salad, fries and a Coke.”

“No - what does he want?”

“I told you: a cobb salad, fries and a Coke.”

“He can literally get that anywhere! Why here? Why now?”

“D’you want me to ask him?”

Their eyes meet.

Kie blinks, “God, fuck no. Fuck this. I’m taking my break.” She practically rips her apron off and storms out of the back door. On her way out, Mr. Carrera chides her for taking far too many breaks and usually, Leni would stand by and listen, but this time she actually has something smarter to do.

Like: take orders and bring dessert to the sweet elderly couple on table twenty two and pick up some dirty dishes from table eight; ignore the snide comments made by the leery frat boys on table thirteen - all while a pair of familiar stormy blues follow her every move..

She can feel his gaze the same way she can feel warm rays of sunshine gently burning her overexposed and sunscreenless back. He is relentless in his staring; shamelessly inspecting every single inch of her being and lingering when she purposely walks by him on more than just one occasion.

“Cobb salad, fries and Coke!” Donnie, one of the chefs, shouts from behind the counter, catching Leni’s attention while a stone-faced Kie passes her the tray.

“Oh you’re back.” Leni chirps, but her friend doesn’t look too amused.

“My dad gave me shit.”

“I’m sorry.” She frowns, “Does that mean I can take my break now?” Kie opens her mouth to speak, but Leni’s already halfway through taking off her apron and gliding towards Rafe’s table - his order in hand.

When she gets there, he’s on his phone - that handsome face of his scrunched into something between a frown and a scowl, but all of it disappears once he catches Leni sliding onto the chair opposite of him.

“You sure like making a guy wait, don’t ya?” He smirks.

“Next time I’ll make sure King Kook gets his order first.”

Rafe snorts, “King Kook? Did Maybank teach you that?”

“Don’t tell me you’re jealous.”

“I’m not. But… I could be.” He leans towards her, knees gently brushing against her own, “Would that make you stop ignoring my texts?” Leni rolls her eyes, trying her hardest to keep a straight face, but it’s impossible.

“I’m not ignoring your texts.” Smiling, she looks at him; follows the golden rays of sunshine dancing across parts of his face, illuminating it in a way that makes him look so young, so innocent. And then she notices it. Her doing. The now yellowing, almost ugly bruise and the faint scar running underneath it. “I’m just busy.”

“Working.”

“Yes.”

“In this dump?”

“Rafe.” Her eyes narrow.

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Look at me like I’m wrong. This place is a dump. And a waste of your time.”

“Oh yeah?” She steals one of his fries, “What do you suggest I do then?”

Rafe stares at her. Furrows his brows and as if he’s contemplating the greatest mystery in the world, takes a large bite out of his salad,, “Quit.” He says with a mouthful. Leni snorts, rolling her eyes again, “And come work for me.”

Her heart skips a beat.

The blue in Rafe’s stormy gaze is hidden behind massive, blown out pupils and for a second; a brief fleeting one, she actually considers the idea. A flurry of thoughts go in and out of her head, filling her mind with all kinds of scenarios - all of which end up with the two of them aggressively making out on top of his desk.

“No.” She says, vehemently ignoring the mess that’s slowly creating between her suddenly clenched thighs.

“Come on-”

“It’s not a good idea.”

“I disagree.”

An exasperated sigh leaves her lips, “What would you even have me do?”

The corners of his lips perk up. She can practically see the word ‘me’ begging to be let out as her mind almost instantly starts conjuring images of Rafe doing the nastiest, most diabolical things to her in his office. He’d have her perched on top of his desk in an instance; hard cock stroking her from behind as tufts of her hair find themselves carelessly bunched up in his fist. She can imagine the warmth of his breath as he presses his body onto her; deep voice whispering in her ear; calling her sweetheart and telling her to behave.

Leni blinks.

Rafe’s lips are moving - he’s been talking all along, but she’s barely managed to catch any of it.

Fuck.

“So, what do you say? Wanna be my intern?”

She opens her mouth, the entirety of her throat suddenly dangerously dry and she wants to say something - urgently - but all her mind can think of is daydreams of Rafe completely taking her from behind.

“Look, I know it sounds like a lot, but I promise I won’t work you too hard. Hell - you won’t even have to do anything. You’ll just… hang out with me.” The weight of his gaze lingers, leaving her underwear soaked in need and thighs clenched in desperation.

“My gap year is supposed to be spent doing productive things. Not wasted lounging on some fratboy’s boat.”

“Well, lucky for you - I consider myself to be very productive.” He leans even closer than before; face merely inches away from her own, “You can always do me.”

There it is.

Leni grins.

Then kicks him in the shin.

Hard.

Rafe shuts his eyes in pain, but that stupid sexy smirk of his doesn’t budge. “Jesus Elena.” He sucks in a breath, before catching her gaze, “Are you trying to put me in the hospital again?”

She shrugs, stealing a couple more of his fries, “Depends. Will you keep hitting on me?”

“I was just warming you up, baby.” His voice drops and the way he says that word; the casualness seeping behind it, throws Leni completely off balance, “I actually came to see you cause of this.” Slightly slack jawed, she watches him pull a folder from under his chair, “I heard back from the PI.” The statement makes Leni sit straighter. Swallow the sudden lump that’s found its way in the middle of her throat and stare at the wad of papers displayed before her.

Bill receipts.

With a slight prickle in her fingertips, Leni examines them all; carefully inspecting every written word and desperately trying to seem casual about it. According to this, Rose spent the remainder of her debit card on two plane tickets: one from Berlin Brandenburg to JFK and the other from JFK to Norfolk International. The rest of the money was spent on a three month stay at the Summerwinds Hotel.

Leni’s hotel.

She swallows.

“Any of these look familiar?” He stares at her knowingly, finger pressed right next to the name of her sad temporary home.

Their eyes meet.

She could lie.

After all, she’s gotten quite good at it in the past few weeks, but Rafe’s not stupid. He’s not gullible either.

“This is where she has you staying isn't she?” The tone in his voice has shifted; it no longer carries that playful lilt, the kind she conned herself into getting used to.

“Yes.” She says so quietly, the word is practically a whisper. Tight jawed, he nods before sliding the papers back into the folder. He knows exactly where to find her now but for some strange reason the thought no longer elicits fear in the pit of Leni’s belly.

“And then?”

“Then?”

“She’s got you settled for the summer. What are you gonna do once September comes rolling in?” That pesky lump has once again lodged itself in the middle of Leni’s throat, the only difference this time being no matter how much she tries pushing it down, it remains there - rotting. Rafe tilts his head slightly, “Or are you not doing the whole gap year thing after all?”

Why do you care - is what she wants to say. She wants to get angry, give him a piece of her mind instead of kicking him or rolling her eyes like some petulant child, but all she can do in that moment is stare. A part of her feels played; feels like he’s flirting with her on purpose - like he’s got some grand agenda hidden under the sleeve of that peach colored suit and yet…

“Leni?” She hears her name echo from across the other side of the restaurant. Almost immediately, Leni turns, looking past her shoulder and directly at JJ. He’s standing there, several feet away from the entrance in a ratty yellow t-shirt and he’s marching now; taking steps so big he manifests by the table in a matter of seconds, “Why are you talking to him?”

“Jayj…”

“Is he bothering you? Is that it?” He barks, eyes full of fury and Leni opens her mouth to say something, but the words are stuck behind that stupid lump in her throat. “Is this bastard bothering you?” He repeats the question, only this time much louder. The chatter from the tables around them seizes a little. The frat boys nearby are already watching them intently. And Rafe-

Rafe is fucking chuckling.

“Hey! Hey asshole!” JJ’s attention is now fully turned on him. Snapping his fingers in front of Rafe’s face like he’s on some bad reality tv show. “Look at me while I’m talking to you! Why the fuck are you bothering my girl?”

“Your girl?” The calmness in Rafe’s voice sends chills down Leni’s spine. But not as much as the shit eating grin he makes the second he meets her gaze, “You his girl, Elena?”

Never in her life has Leni wanted more for the ground to open and swallow her whole entirely. She sighs - the last thing she wants to do right now is waste her breath and break trying to defuse a completely unnecessary situation and yet, there she is. Shaking and with numb fingertips, Leni pulls herself from her chair and straight into JJ’s arms.

“Jay, it's okay. I’m… Look at me -” He does exactly as she tells him to. The blue in his eyes is so calming; so mesmerizing she almost forgets just how hard her heart is thumping against her chest, “It’s just some stupid Rose stuff. I got this.” She tells him in a hushed tone and almost immediately feels JJ’s previously tense body start to soften. “Go sit on our table. I’ll come find you once I’m done, okay?”

He nods, casting one last glare in Rafe's direction before pulling Leni into a kiss so hard, it bruises her. Suddenly startled, she returns to her seat; gaze tightly glued on the back of JJ’s head as he swiftly disappears towards the other side of the restaurant.

“I’m not.” She says in a half-daze, her mind still reeling from the way he just manhandled her.

“Huh?” Rafe hums, his mouth full of cobb salad.

“I’m not his girl.”

Just then, she catches something flickering in the storm behind those blue eyes of his - a bolt of lightning that looks a lot like satisfaction and then finally, a smirk. “You should tell him that.” His gaze is electrifying, “I don’t like sharing.”

Leni blinks.

Steals yet another one of his fries. “Oh, really?”

“I don’t like sharing you.”

“Sounds like something you should talk to your therapist about.”

Rafe snorts. “Did he even get you a present?” His question makes Leni’s heart skip a beat. So does the sudden shift in his voice. He’s reverted back to that whiny arrogant child she loved to loathe and spent countless hours talking shit about in Sarah’s old room.

“A book.”

He scoffs, “Didn’t know Maybank knew what books are.”

“Don’t be a dick.” She barks, “At least he got me something.”

The corners of his lips perk up, “I thought you didn’t care about presents?” He says slyly, sounding like his old current self again. Leni shifts in her seat, gaze now vehemently focused on the plate of half-eaten fries that Rafe is slowly pushing towards her. “Or do you just care about mine?” Their eyes meet. “You’ve been thinking about it haven’t you? About all the things I could do to you?”

Just then, she goes for another kick, but this time Rafe is quicker. His fingers swiftly wrap around Leni’s ankle, blocking her mid-attack. He grins - a single calloused thumb gently brushing against her skin and fanning a flame that spreads across her entire body in less than a nanosecond.

“Rafe-” His name escapes her lips in a form of a sigh - desperate and needy - and she hates herself for it. Hates the effect this complete and utter asshole has on her; the way he drives her crazy and fills her whole being with stupid, insatiable need… “Let go of me.” It takes all her might to get her voice to sound angry; to sound like she absolutely abhors the idea of his hands on her body.

Rafe stares at her. That shit eating smirk never leaves his face as his touch lingers - blunt nails gently scrape against her burning skin, “I can make you feel real good baby.” He leers before finally dropping her leg. Her other foot makes contact just then, kicking his right shin even harder than the one before and eliciting a loud rumbling laugh from his throat.

Motherfucker is actually enjoying this.

Trembling, Leni jolts from her seat. Her underwear, soaking wet. Her heart in shambles. The weight of his gaze is dizzying. His growing smile even more so. Tight jawed, she readies herself to walk past him, but not before stopping for a moment; right there in front of him. She watches his hand stretch out towards her; fingers gently grazing the skin under the hem of her shorts.

Their eyes meet.

“In your dreams Rafferty.” She snarls, before finally stomping away.

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