#can you tell I am desperate for player housing

[astralarias]

actually on that topic

what would be you guys' dream guild halls?

Personally I'd love a big fancy luxury airship, since my main trio of OCs live in one. It would be a static model with a background animated so it looks like it's flying, like the end of LW4. It'd have a bunch of different rooms, like a war room, a kitchen with places to cook, and all the other crafting stations in fitting places. And of course plenty of living quarters and rooms to be decorated and made cozy.

[inuyashaluver]

Hi lovely I love ur stuff 🩷 I have a little request/idea - obviously feel free to ignore it

I was thinking R has a really thick accent (English - either Scouse (Liverpool), Geordie (Newcastle) or West Country (Devon/Somerset/Farmer) or Aussie or something really thick like hard to understand from native speakers let alone anyone else) but R plays in Barca and has a crush on a Spanish player (Maybe Patri? maybe Ona? Maybe Alexia?) and is tryna talk to them more and maybe ask them out but they just get looked at funny and they walk off and she goes to Kiera and Lucy and is like what have I done? Do they all hate me? And [Crush] overheads them and goes round to their house after training and is like I really wanna get to know u, I think you’re really pretty etc but I cannot understand a word that comes out of ur mouth to the point where I am questioning whether it’s English

qué? - alexia putellas

alexia putellas x reader

description: in which your accent proves to be difficult to understand

warnings: LONG!! swearing, misunderstandings, spanish in bold italics

a/n: i love this woman, your honour!! i was writing alexia angst but had to put out the fluff haha!! thank you so much for the love and request, lovely!! ily and enjoy ❤️

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you never thought your accent would get you into trouble but you were entirely wrong. and we’re not talking about trouble like criminal, we’re talking romantically.

—

you’re from liverpool, your thick, scouse accent distinct in your dialect. at home in england, the accent was understood most of the time, with an occasional person asking for clarification about your words but you didn’t mind.

even some of your england teammates had to ask you to repeat yourself occasionally when you got overly excited or stressed, your accent proving to be the hardest to understand at those moments.

you often needed a translator for even native english speakers if you spoke too quickly, lucy and later grace helping out when people were truly confused.

when lucy and keira moved from manchester city, you moved with them, having played in the club for 2 years and desperately wanting a change. and so, when the contract arrived from barcelona for the three of you, you accepted it without a second thought.

you had supported barcelona in liga F, having a huge appreciation for the way the spanish players moved, the quick passes and the goals that came out of nowhere. you were excited to pick up those skills to adapt to your own play.

and through your extensive research, you grew a special appreciation for alexia. in your eyes, alexia was the definition of perfect, not only her football skills, but her as a whole.

you would watch her interviews and videos for ‘research purposes’, claiming it was to practise your spanish. and it was, until you zoned out hearing the gentle hum of alexia’s voice, getting distracted entirely but you weren’t complaining.

when you got caught making heart eyes at your phone during england camp, the teasing was so relentless it wasn’t even funny.

—

“our little (y/n) has a crush on la reina! (the queen)” lucy exclaims in the change room, you immediately turn off your phone and look up at her with an icy glare, only making her smile at you affectionately with a pinch to your cheek that you were quick to swat away.

“you’re not much older than me” you glare, “5 years is 5 years” she shrugs, moving away when you launched an empty bottle at her.

“go on, tell us about your crush” leah smiles, millie and rachel pretend to kiss each other while looking at you and you heat up in the cheeks.

“i’m only watching so i can pick up spanish” you defend, lucy laughs loudly, out of the three transfers, she was definitely the one who picked up the most spanish.

“excuse me, lucia, and everyone in here,” you scoff, “is it such a crime to watch a video of my future captain?” your accent was so heavy at this point, everyone cracked a little smile at you.

“so you were watching videos of alexia then?” leah smirks, you let out a frustrated groan, “leah, shut up man” everyone laughs, the teasing continuing until keira and alessia told everyone to stop.

during the whole of camp, it wasn’t uncommon you got caught looking at photos or videos of alexia, the teasing was so bad you thought you would explode.

—

when the time finally came for you to join barcelona, you were incredibly nervous. the fear of underperforming playing on your mind, only becoming worse at the thought of embarrassing yourself in front of a certain blonde you couldn’t take your mind off.

lucy and keira assured you everything would be fine, but you weren’t convinced, unsure of how you’d react when you finally saw alexia.

when you all walked to the change rooms, it was shocking how welcoming everyone was. hugs and kisses to the cheeks had you feeling so accepted amongst your new team.

and funnily enough, the last person to greet you was alexia, sending you a charming smile that had your stomach erupting with butterflies.

“(y/n), yes? bienvenida! (welcome)” alexia grins, her arms pulling you into a warm hug, her scent enveloping you and making you borderline dizzy.

“(y/n) is a big fan of you” lucy teases as alexia lets you slip from the hug after you mumble a quick hello. alexia gives a surprised smile, looking between a cheeky looking lucy and a sheepish looking you.

“you’re very good, too, I look forward to playing with you,” alexia’s hand moved to give your bicep a gentle squeeze and you swore your heart stopped, your cheeks were tinged with pink and you could barely formulate a sentence.

“yeah, i’m excited to play with ya” you breathe out, you move to your new cubby and get changed into the barcelona kit, feeling at home already even though it was your first day.

due to you busying yourself with avoiding alexia, you missed the way her gaze lingered on you as you changed, she was intrigued by you.

what you didn’t know was alexia had done her own forms of research. she had heard your name countless times in the media, a rising star in the making.

she respected the way you played, a midfielder who wasn’t afraid to take risks but also managed to avoid fouls frequently.

she wanted to get to know you as much as you wanted to get to know her.

—

weeks and months fly by and it was easy to say you felt comfortable amongst the team. your spanish was surprisingly getting better, being able to go through training without a translator most of the time.

the girls reciprocated you well, you’d go to team bonding nights and laugh and joke around with them. it was obvious to everyone except alexia that you were harbouring a crush on the captain.

the ways your eyes would follow her every move with pink cheeks honestly exposed yourself. and what made it harder was that alexia and you were growing closer each day.

—

one day you were chatting with mapi and ingrid, more like you getting teased while you begged them to stop before you were interrupted by a certain someone.

“do you want to be my partner?” alexia questions from behind you suddenly, making you choke on your own spit as she looked at you with a kind smile. “really?” you breathe out, she nods, nodding her head to the pitch for you to follow her.

you’d both been able to converse easily as the months went by, she’d have to ask you to slow down a couple of times when you both talked about something you had in common but it worked.

as you both trained together, you chatted and laughed, talking about random topics.

when you both got to shooting practice, alexia analysed your every move. she would give little nods of approval when you touched the ball, sending you an encouraging smile if you made eye contact, your heart was fluttering around her.

“you should put more weight into your hips when you kick” alexia corrects, you look at her questioningly, she huffs out a little laugh and comes to stand behind you.

her large hands place themselves on your hips and she turns them slightly to the front. her front was pressed against your back and you certainly weren’t breathing. she noticed you tense but chose to ignore it.

“focus here before you kick so it’s stronger” alexia says next to your ear, squeezing your hips gently before letting go of you. “try again, vamos! (let’s go)” she exclaims, you do as she says with her corrections and it was a much better result.

she smiles proudly, “buena niña! (good girl)” she laughs, coming up to you to squeeze your shoulders encouragingly, your cheeks were burning.

the entire team watched the interaction with big grins, ready to tease you for how sheepish you looked.

“gracias (thank you), ale” you scratch the back of your neck with an embarrassed smile, she shakes her head, “it’s nothing, thank me with a goal next game” she jokes, pinching your cheek teasingly before walking off to get some water.

you’re left there in shock, lucy and keira approaching with cheesy grins. “you’re in love” lucy coos, poking your shoulder teasingly while you shielded yourself in a hug from keira.

“i’m so fucking stupid, why can’t i be normal” you groan, keira laughs, her hand rubbing up and down your back. “you’re just shy, which is weird to see because you’re the complete opposite” she laughs, you pull back to throw her a glare.

“it’s cute” lucy chuckles, “i can’t wait to tell everyone about the development” she grins, her and keira share a hearty laugh seeing your face go pale, while you attempted not to scream.

“don’t you fucking dare” you grit out, “i won’t” lucy winks, unfortunately she did and by the time training was over, your phone was blowing up with text messages talking about the interaction.

you looked at lucy with a stone cold glare while she blew you a kiss, alexia watched how angry you were, she could practically feel it radiating off you on the other side of the change room.

“estás bien? (are you okay)” alexia walks up to you, holding a cold drink out to you. you take it after a moment of hesitation, “uh, yeah, sí” you smile, “lucia is annoying you?” alexia grins, looking over at lucy to see her and keira whispering while looking at you. “yes, she’s very annoying” you grumble, your eyebrows furrowing.

alexia smiles fondly at you, her hand moving to your face, her thumb smoothing out the crease between your eyebrows. “wrinkles” she tutts, your breath caught in the back of your throat as you looked up at her.

“are you coming tonight?” she says like she didn’t just make you flatline. she’s talking about a team bonding session at her house. “yeah, i think so” you smile at her, “think or know?” she teases, was she flirting with you?

“know, i’ll be there” you mock, she nods with a pleased expression, “hasta luego, lindura (see you later, cutie)” she winks, moving to grab her bag from her cubby and leave, making sure to look back at you another time with a soft smile before walking out.

you get pulled out of your trance once you hear your phone blowing up again, checking it to see lucy had recorded you watching alexia leave. you throw your head back in frustration but chose to avoid letting the older girl feel your wrath, you were still on a buzz from the thought of alexia flirting with you.

—

when you arrived at alexia’s house, you brought her a bottle of wine with a sheepish grin. when she opened the door for you, she pulled you into the warmest hug, both of you fitting together like a puzzle.

“finalmente! (finally) i was waiting for you!” she grins as she pulls away, taking the wine out of your hands and grabbing one of yours to drag you into the living room where everyone was.

her hand was so warm against yours, soft against your skin and you really didn’t want her to let go. “you look beautiful” alexia smiles before she ushers you to sit down, you barely had the time to tell her how breathtaking she looked, dressed casually but still looking like she could be on the front of a magazine.

you sit next to mapi and she immediately bombards you with questions, “have you kissed yet?” she questions, you slap her knee, “ingrid, your girlfriend is a bully” you huff, ingrid laughs, nodding along with you with an apologetic smile.

everyone was watching a movie while eating, alexia sitting beside you, the two of you would chat back and forth with small giggles and smiles shared between you.

by the time the night was ending, alexia’s arm was resting behind you on the couch, basically over your shoulder while you were in your own little bubble.

when you left that night, you couldn’t stop thinking about all the interactions you had with the catalan, you needed to do something about it. fast.

—

on a match day for barcelona, you decided it was time for you to tell her about your feelings. it was clear you were flirting with each other. confirmed during the game.

in the second half, you managed to get a goal, using the technique alexia had taught you a couple of days prior.

she was the first one to you after, the loud roar of the crowd drowned out when you felt alexia’s strong arms wrapping around your waist.

you both smiled so brightly as she congratulated you, placing you on the ground, giving you an affectionate kiss on the forehead and squeezing your shoulders. this told you everything. it wasn’t just her being friendly, it was alexia making a move.

at the end of the match, the two of you lingered in the middle of the pitch, you were fidgeting so much alexia was worried.

“(y/n)?” she dips her head to make eye contact with you, “estás bien? (are you okay)” you nod, opening your mouth to speak but nothing came out. “take a deep breath” she smiles, a hand on your shoulder offering you comfort but also stressing you out.

“ale” you start, she nods with an encouraging smile, “i really fancy ya, ale, i’ve been wantin’ to tell ya for a while” you blurt out, alexia’s eyebrows furrow, she looks a little confused.

the silence was loud, why hasn’t she said anything back. if this was her rejection, it hurt more than anything she could have verbalised.

“you know what, forget i said anythin’” you run off before she could say anything. “qué? (what)” she was about to ask you to repeat yourself, one - because you were speaking too fast, two - she didn’t know what fancy meant.

you heard her call out for you but you ran into the change room, knowing keira and lucy were in there. “keira!” you yell, “fucking check my pulse!” you shove your arm in her face and she looks at you in shock. only a couple of people were inside, and the ones that were were shocked at how you tumbled into the room.

“jesus, your heart is going so fast” keira says as she presses her fingers to the inside of your wrist. “fuck, why couldn’t you tell me i’m dead and this is a nightmare” you groan, your hands running over your face frustratingly.

“what’s wrong with you?” lucy says as she walks out of the shower to see you in absolute shambles. “everything!” you explain each and every detail and they look at you sympathetically, understanding now why you were so upset.

what you didn’t know was alexia was outside, ear pressed to the door as she heard you explain that you were trying to confess. she feels her stomach tighten, cursing herself for not understanding what you were saying.

“whatever, i’m going home, don’t follow me” you grit, tears pooling at your waterline as you rush out. alexia had moved out of eyeline when she heard you, quickly going into the change room and drilling lucy and keira for your address that they happily gave her with sly grins. happy to know it was all a misunderstanding.

—

that afternoon, you hastily wiped your tears away thinking about alexia. you had misunderstood her intentions clearly, you were disappointed with yourself.

you heard the banging from the front door and groaned, knowing your fellow england teammates were probably on the other side with ice cream and apologetic smiles.

“i told you both not to follow me-” you huff, the door opening to see alexia standing there, a bouquet of bright flowers in hand. “hola (hello)” she smiles, “what are you doing here?” you ask softly, “can i come in?” you nod, moving back a little so she could step inside. she hands you the flowers and you take them with a confused expression.

what type of rejection was this?

“i heard you speaking to lucy and keira before” she starts nervously, both of you walking to the kitchen so you could put the flowers in water, they were beautiful.

“it’s fine if you don’t feel the same” you shrink into yourself, brushing the petals of one of the flowers between your fingers.

“hermosa (beautiful)” she calls out, moving around your counter to stand directly in front of you. “me gustas mucho, y quiero estar contigo (i like you a lot, i want to be with you)” she says earnestly, speaking in her mother tongue and hoping you understood because she was speaking from the heart.

you freeze, each and every word quickly translated in your head. “amor (love), you’re very beautiful and nice but you speak very fast, i did not understand a word you said before” she laughs, you can’t help but laugh too, shaking your head at how fast you fled the situation.

“i’m sorry, ale” you grin, “don’t be” she dismisses, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear, relishing in the blush she just produced on your cheeks.

“me gustas mucho (i like you a lot), alexia” you smile, she gives you a dazzling expression, appreciating how you spoke her mother tongue to her so she really understood this time. “muy bien, preciosa! (very good, precious)” she coos affectionately, her hand cradling your cheek as she directed your eyes to hers.

“we will teach each other, sí?” she grins cheekily, you hum along with her words, “sí”.

she pulls you closer to place a sweet kiss on your lips, your stomach lurching at how soft they were against yours.

you both smile into it as she drew you closer, your arms wrapping around her neck while her free hand came to rest on the small of your back to press you against her.

she pulls away, not without pressing a few more kisses to your lips through the giggles and the small chatter between the two of you.

—

when you both came to training the next day hand in hand, sighs of relief were heard from everyone. lucy whipped out her phone as quickly as she could and sent pictures to the england group chat, your phone blowing up more than ever.

now that the team saw you interact, the teasing somehow got worse every time alexia would kiss you, or even hold your hand.

the pining drove everyone insane but the loved up versions of the two of you were insufferable. you were attached at the hip, just how you and alexia wanted.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you know the drill, just pretend it’s you xx

liked by keirawalsh and 44,232 others

alexiaputellas: mi niña (my girl)

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yourname: mami

↳ alexiaputellas: i didn’t teach her this

↳ marialeonn16: sureeeee

lucybronze: the most annoying couple ever

↳ yourname: shut up man

↳ leahwilliamsonn: there she is!!

↳ keirawalsh: she went soft but is still a shit head

↳ yourname: @/alexiaputellas bebé! defend me!

↳ alexiaputellas: you are soft

↳ yourname: the betrayal is unreal

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Death Wish 4

Warnings: non/dubcon, mentions of crime, violence/abuse and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Bucky Barnes

Part of the mob drabbles au

Summary: you’re desperate for a way out of your life and you ask a powerful man for help (plus!reader)

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

Photo Inspo

You close the cupboard and nearly jump out of your skin as Adrienne stands on the other side of it. She stares at you soberly before she cracks a sheepish smile. You show your fright with a hand on your chest. 

“Ade,” you huff. 

She laughs, “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to.” 

“No problem,” you assure her. “What’s up?” 

Her nostrils flare and her smile dulls, “it’s been a week.” 

One week. Your father’s been away for a whole week. He’s rarely been gone that long. His jobs are never more than a couple days. And you haven’t heard from him, but that’s not unusual or disappointing. 

“Hopefully it will be another,” Kitty says as she walks into the kitchen with a half-finished glass of water. “It’s calm around her. Isn’t it?” 

You nod. A silence rises around the three of you. You think back to the one memory you have of a peaceful house. When it was the three of you and your mother. 

“He got that kidney stone,” Kitty says. “Had him in the hospital for days. Ma said it was barely the size of a bead.” 

“Best days of my life,” you agree. 

“I don’t remember,” Adrienne says. 

As the youngest, she doesn’t remember everything and you sometimes think that’s better for her sanity. Even your memory is splotchy. There are fractures of noise and vision. Sometimes you only see, other times it replays like a record on a player and crawls through your ears. 

“So, Ade, why are you so concerned?” Kitty inquires. 

Adrienne hesitates. She shrugs and looks away guiltily. She’s a bad liar. You all are despite the typical consequences. 

“Mitzi wanted to see a movie. They’re screening Breakfast at Tiffany’s at the Golden Reel.” 

“Audrey?” Kitty preens. “My favourite.” 

“You can come. I was going to ask both of you but I thought if daddy came back--” 

“And we’re all gone...” you add. “You two go. I can deal with him.” 

“That’s not fair,” Kitty says. 

“Really, go. I can’t focus on a movie right now.” You insist. “Have some popcorn for me, alright?” 

“He probably won’t be back,” Kitty argues. 

You wave her off, “really, it’s fine. You know I hate crowds. That theatre is tiny and it’ll probably be packed on a Friday night.” 

“Okay, but I’m bringing you back raisinettes. I know you love them.” Kitty insists. 

“Have fun. Tell Mitzi I said hello,” you turn back to the cupboards and run your hands over the laminate.  

You’ve been restless. You clean just to keep yourself busy. To keep from thinking. And when you lay down at night, you’re not kept awake by your usual dread. It isn’t your father standing on your chest, it’s Barnes. In your dreams, he doesn’t strut into the bakery, but into your house. And he sits at the table where your father would usually be and sits silently, waiting. 

That’s why this calm unsettles you. There’s always a storm to come after the quiet. It will unfurl soon enough. 

“Hey, you okay?” Kitty’s gentle touch makes you wince. 

“I’m good,” you assure her and nearly gag on your tongue. For a moment, it wasn’t your voice, it was your mother’s. That same lie she told for so long. You both hesitate at the echo of your lifetimes. “Really,” you face her, “you know I’m dying to have this place to myself. When does that ever happen?” 

She stares at you then smiles. “Yeah, enjoy it while it lasts.” 

She falters again. It’s what you’re all thinking. You want to milk every bit of joy out of your father’s absence.

Kitty turns and grabs Adrienne’s hand, quickly redirecting from the threat of inevitability, “Ade, what are you gonna wear?” 

You take out the flour and all the other ingredients you need. For once, you can afford to spare a bit extra. When you were really young, your mother made her own bread. That stopped shortly after she had Adrienne. She changed after that. She was exhausted with all three of you. 

You measure out every part before you begin. Your precision has always tied you in knots. You find it hard to get anything done unless it’s entirely orderly. In a house full of chaos, that means often you don’t get much done at all. 

As you knead the dough, Kitty and Adrienne’s voices garble on the stairs. They stomp down to the first floor and call a goodbye to you through the doorway. You holler back but keep your hands working. 

You get the loaf in the oven and clean up the mess. The empty house is eerie. You can’t remember the last time you were all alone. Really alone. Ever, if at all. 

You wash the bowls and the whisk and the roller. You put it all away, step-by-step, running through every single detail. The timer counts down, the small windable egg-shaped device your mother always had going for one way or another. Tick, tick, tick. 

It goes off and you jump. For a moment, you’re back in your memories. You’re a little girl at the table, watching your mother rush around the kitchen. Kitty’s beside you with a colouring book and Adrienne’s in her high chair. 

Your mother limps from the fridge to stove. She doesn’t let it deter her. She bends to take out the pan of food as the timer buzzes. Adrienne wails at the noise as you cover your ears. The smell of cigarette smoke singes in your nostrils. 

You twist the timer so it goes silent as you return to the present. The scent of tobacco fades as the fresh baked bread wafts through the kitchen. You open the creaky oven door and use the stained oven mitts to take the pan out. Your mother always wanted a new stove. You assume she wanted a lot of things that she never got. 

You put the pan down and shut off the oven. The doorbell pierces the air and you spin, your back hitting the counter. It wouldn’t be your father; he wouldn’t ring the door. He always comes in screaming, even in the middle of the night. 

You put the oven mitts on the table as you pass and step out into the hall. You near the door, a shadow on the other side of the marbled glass. It’s a man. Your heartbeat spikes. Your father is a criminal and a strange man knocking at your door could be dangerous. 

Is death so bad when living is terrifying? 

You open the door. A wash of deja vu flows over you. It isn’t a strange man, it’s Steve Rogers. Again. That doesn’t ease your worries. 

“You. Come.” He orders you. 

You hold your breath. That is unusual. Your father’s associates come and go, most times they barely acknowledge you, they’re just there to talk shit with him or drag him off on some caper. This is different. Different is dangerous. 

“Yeah, you,” he snaps his fingers. “Look, I don’t got all day. Let’s go.” 

You look down. “My shoes...” 

“Get ‘em,” he sighs and crosses his arms. 

You step back and leave the door open. You step into a pair of scuffed flats and turn back to him. You don’t even grab your keys as you step outside. You’re shaking. 

“Is it my father?” You ask. 

“No questions.” He snarls as he turns and marches down the narrow walkway. 

You follow him at a bouncing pace, struggling to keep up with him. He leads you to the car and opens the back door. It’s then that you notice the woman in his front seat. Her eyes are skittish as she peers back out at you. 

“Get in,” he opens the door. “And be quiet.” 

You put your head down and obey. The look on that woman’s face is enough to keep you in line. Besides, your father prepared you well. There’s an order to things and you’re at the very bottom. So keep your mouth shut and do what you’re told. 

[footygirl114]

Soldado (Alexia Putellas X Reader)

One of the prompts inspired me, so here ya go. It's definitely rusty but please let me know what we think!

Prompt: “Don’t just say that and then walk away!”

Walking up to the front door of the Putella’s home was one the most nerve wracking experiences you have ever experienced in your first 18 years of life. This home had become your sanctuary in the last 3 years, the family had taken you in and made sure you were loved and cared for and in return all you did was ruin the best and only friendship you ever had. 

You had grown up with an absent mother and a drunk father, to say your childhood had been rough was an understatement. You were able to fend for your self by the age of 6 and you knew to hide whenever your father came home after 8pm. When he wasn’t drunk he was a half caring father, but you could never shake the black eyes and bruises you learned to hide. The only good thing he ever did for you was to make sure by the age of 15 you had been a good enough football player to be in the training with the Espanyol team. 

This is where you met Alexia Putellas, she was this young superstar but she still befriended you. It didn’t take her long to see through the lies of where the bruises came from, and one late practice where you avoided going home she got you to spill the truth. From then on she made sure that holidays, school vacations, and everything in between you were invited to stay with her family. 

Her mom became like a mother you never had, and Alba was the sister you never had. But Alexia she just always remained Alexia, you never knew what that meant until you turned 18. You had finally realised that she was more than just anything to you, and that you were madly in love with her. Never being able to keep a secret from her, you confessed your feelings to her 3 weeks ago and you haven’t heard from her since she walked away without responding. 

Which brings you back to today, trying to work up the courage to knock on the door of the only place you would ever consider a home ready to say your goodbyes to the family you wish you still had. The last 3 weeks have been a whirlwind, and it took your drunk father almost breaking your arm and sending you to the ER to finally realise you needed to get out. You had walked the streets of Barcelona aimlessly trying to find a solution, and when the universe showed you a sign you jumped at it. 

Shaking your head you gained the courage to reach up and knock at the door of the house. While you wait for someone to answer you hope that you can get this out without breaking down. 

When the door opens you come face to face with Alba and you say softly “Hola, Albs.”

Alba smiles softly and leans against the door, blocking your way in, and she asks “what are you doing here Y/N?” 

“I need to talk to Ale” you tell her deciding not to drag this out. 

She crosses her arms over her chest and asks “Why would I let you do that? She shut down and hasn’t said anything for the last weeks and we haven’t seen you, you must have hurt her Y/N.” 

Shaking your head you tell her “I never meant to do that Alba, but I promise I just need to tell her one thing and then I am gone.” You know you sound like your begging and you hope the desperation in your voice helps. 

Before she can respond Alexia shows up at the door behind her sister and says “Alba its okay I got it.” 

Alba turns and looks to her and then turns back to you and says “if you hurt her again I will hurt you.” She finishes with a glare and then moves back into the house. 

Alexia steps outside on the porch with you and softly shuts the door. You take a moment to take her in, knowing this will be the last time you may see the women who has your heart. She’s in her most comfortable state, a pair of footy shorts, a soft hoodie (you note is one of yours) and barefoot.

You both stand there in silence for a minute and she finally breaks it and says “I am not ready to talk to you about it.”

“You don’t have to say anything. I came here to tell you one thing and then I will be out of your hair, you wont need to worry about avoiding me” you tell her softly. 

“what? Y/N whats going on?” she asks softly stepping closer to you. 

You take a step back and say “I’m leaving, I quit the team and I joined the army. I know you don’t understand it but I need to not be here anymore, and I need to do something thats for me, and will ensure I get away from him.” 

She stares at you and doesn’t say anything but a soft “Y/N.”

“No, don’t do that, this isn’t about you this is for me. I love you Alexia and I will always be in love with you but I cant stay on the side line of my own life anymore, I need to become the best person  I can be and get out from this dark cloud that is hanging over here. Its for the best, I cant wait to see you become the superstar I know you will be, but I cant do that here, watching it and knowing that you don’t love me back, that you aren’t in love with me. So this is goodbye Ale” 

You slowly move down the stairs and move to wipe the tears under your eyes, and you make it to the end of the walkway when she moves and says “Don’t just say that and walk away from me Y/N! Thats not fair.” 

You pause and turn your head towards her and says “what’s not fair is losing everything I have ever wanted because I have never been able to lie to you, I am doing something for me and you have to understand that.” 

You don’t let her add or say anything else as you turn your back on her and move to your car, you hop in and start the engine driving away to your new life without looking back. 

8 YEARS LATER

After 8 years of being a proper solider and training to better your self, you were finally able to settle down, and of course Barcelona would always have a hold on your heart. During your basic training your superiors noticed how easy it was for you to learn and communicate in many languages, add in that you knew how to fight and take it hit it made you the perfect soldier for a special ops team. 

During your 8 years of active duty you spent 3 tours in Iraq, Afghanistan and other War torn countries. And when you were not on tour you were either in the UK or the USA learning and bettering your skills to be a better help for the team. It was a long 8 years of constantly being on the go and when an offer came up to go back to Barcelona and be no longer on active duty you took it. 

They wanted your skills to help teach younger inexperienced soldiers and you craved the freedom and your bones ached for a stable home for your self. The Barcelona Police force hired you and were more than happy to have you work for them and also assist the army in their training. 

Barcelona was where you had your own personal demons, and you knew after 8 years of running it was finally time to slow down and face those demons head on. It helped you were much stronger and mentally tougher then when you were 18 and you knew you needed to face them head on. 

What you didn’t expect was to have to face one of them only a month into your new life in Barcelona. You had been out on patrol with your partner and were called to an assault at one of the smaller beaches in town. You got out of the passenger seat of the car and did a scan of the surroundings and you noticed a small crowd gathered at the edge of the sand and one person lying on the ground. 

You met your partners eye and you both walked over, you with your military training on high alert, one hand on the hilt of the gun at your hip, your eyes roaming the surroundings. When you got closer to the crowd you almost stopped, when you noticed who was standing off on the edge of the crowd but you pushed through when you saw the guy on the ground get up and start to run at someone else in the crowd. You and your partner both sprang into action and got in between them and the guy you were holding tried to take a swing at the other and you easily subdued him and had him on his back with his hands locked behind his back in the blink of an eye. 

Once he was secure with the handcuffs on your hip you hopped up and hauled him up with you, you turned and met your partners eyes who nodded at you and had his guy also in cuffs. He turned to the crowd and asked for any witnesses to what happened, as you moved your guy to the car and sat him in the back seat. 

You sat him down and asked him his side of the story. After listening to his side you closed the door and left him in the car as a second patrol car rolled up for the second guy. You nodded to them and mentioned the guy int he back of your car and you walked back to the crowd. You took a deep breath and readied your self to face the first of your demons. 

“Who’s next to be interviewed?” you asked your partner as you walked up beside him, and he pointed to the group of 3 girls to the left.

Moving towards them you introduced your self “Hola, I am Officer Y/L/N and I will need to see your IDs and then I can take your statement.” They all handed their IDs over and as you were matching them and recording their names and information you couldn’t help but take a peak at the women who held your heart. 

You hadn’t seen her since that day 8 years ago on her mothers front steps, you had followed her career and you knew she was in the middle of a miracle season and she was on track to win everything. Seeing her on the computer screen through a grainy stream wasn’t the same as seeing her in person. Just looking at her was slowly igniting that spark inside you that you thought you had buried 8 years ago. 

“Can one of you tell me what happened?” you ask them ready to take notes and keep this professional. 

“so basically, we were lying here and the guy in your car came up and started to give us a bit of a hard time, but were used to it. SO we told him to leave us alone, and then the guy there with your partner walked up and tried to defend us, and the other guy just threw a punch at him.” You had their IDs so you knew this was Maria Leon who explained it. 

“they started going at each other and thats when Ale called 911, the commotion drew more people over and they stopped fighting when they had a crowd and then you guys showed up.” Jennifer Hermoso explained the rest to you. 

“thank you, so to be clear, the one in the back of the car threw the first punch and harassed you?” you asked wanting to finish this up. 

Maria smiled and said “I wouldn’t say harassed, we can take care of ourselves, but yes he started it and threw the first punch.”

“And you both agree?” you ask.

“Yep, he did” Jennifer agrees. 

Alexia just nods and remains silent through the whole exchange. You nod and say “okay this clears things up, someone may be in touch but you are free to go.”

The two of them smile and say their thanks and move to leave, but Alexia remains standing in front of you silent. 

“ale you coming?” Jennifer asks her and it seems to shake her out of it and she nods and moves to gather her stuff. 

You nod at nothing and move to go back to your partner, you both agree you to the statement you got from different people and then you move to walk back to the car together. Before you can get half way there you turn back and look toward Alexia and you meet her eyes, as she’s still watching you. 

It takes your partner nudging you for you to break contact and you move to get into the car. before you can fully sit you hear “Officer Y/LN” yelled out behind you and you turn and see Alexia moving quickly towards you, you close the door and step towards her and away from your partner hearing the exchange. 

“Yes Alexia?” you ask her softly as she stops a foot from you. 

“You’re back?” she asks you to the point. 

“I am” 

“for good?” she asks you again straight to the point.

“I think so yeah” 

“okay then.” she says and moves to walk away. 

“thats it?” you ask her confused. 

She shrugs and half turns to you and says “How does it feel being on the other end of someone walking way from you? It sucks, being left to wonder what they mean and what they are going to do.” 

You can feel the pang in your heart listening to how broken she sounds and you ask her “Can we talk about it?” 

“now you want to talk? What happened to talking 8 years ago?” she turns on you half shouting and you know that she’s drawn and scene. 

“ale, please can we talk somewhere not here, and not when I am on duty?” you ask her. 

She looks around and shakes her head and says “you know where to find me, if you even want to.” As she finishes she jogs away towards her friends and you are left standing there wondering if this is a demon you will be able to tame, or if you were doomed to be in love with someone you can never have. 

[formulawolff]

🏎️ the garage 🏎️

this is where i am going to keep all of my upcoming works! they will be sitting in the garage, waiting to be released out onto the grid! <3

✧˖ ° key ✧˖ °

in the garage - upcoming works to be posted sometime this week

at the paddock - upcoming works, more than likely posted within the next one to two weeks

residing at team headquarters - ideas i have brewing, perhaps potential series or fic ideas, a lot of rambling more than likely, fics to be posted at some point in time

˚∘⊰ in the garage ⊱˚∘

mile high club -> mercedes driver!reader x toto wolff

the gray areas -> team principal!reader x toto wolff

first time for everything -> virgin!reader x toto wolff

{untitled} -> student intern!reader x toto wolff

what they want -> mercedes driver reader x toto wolff {angst + smut}

˚∘⊰ at the paddock ⊱˚∘

driver!reader x fernando alonso -> enemies-to-lovers vibes where the reader gets into a crash and nando comes to visit

girlfriend!reader x toto wolff -> haunted house special!

sugar baby!reader x toto wolff

reader x toto wolff -> social media stranger au

just one date -> part ii. of toto wolff x horner's!daughter reader

oscar piastri x reader {new driver unlocked!}

gf!reader x toto -> toto takes the reader on their first date as a couple. all of the fluffiness and goodness in the world!

˚∘⊰ residing at team headquarters ⊱˚∘

reader x toto wolff -> inspired by too sweet by hozier

gf!reader x toto wolff smut -> toto making you walk around the brackley home naked so he can have easy access whenever he wants

reader x seb vettel fluff -> cute moments over the radio hehe

{untitled} alkaline spin-off -> where gg wins in austria and toto rewards her

{untitled} alkaline spin-off -> the one where gg is pregnant and toto is the best dad & attentive partner ever

{untitled} alkaline spin-off -> where gg introduces toto to her parents

fernando x actress!reader -> smau

female!driver x grid -> where the grid reacts to her not having a definitive seat for next season

olympian!reader x toto wolff -> the reader is the goat but is a little upset toto wants to keep their relationship under wraps. after a huge fight, toto comes to the realization that maybe she deserves to be shown off

olympian!reader x danny ric -> danny is so stoked to show off his stud of a girlfriend

toto being obsessed with reader's chest -> a oneshot of toto invested in some tatas

singer!reader x checo -> sometimes internet sleuths can expose someone's biggest secret, no matter how famous they are

enemies to lovers -> toto wolff

{untitled alkaline spin-off} -> the one where toto has a massive breeding kink

{untitled} driver!reader x joe burrow

{untitled} engineer!reader x josh allen

reporter!reader x toto wolff — based on the infamous football interview moment

alkaline spin-off -> gg gets in a crash and susie helps out for toto

max verstappen x wolff!reader -> max and toto's wolff daughter have been secretly seeing one another. that is, until a little weasel airs it all out in abu dhabi

checo pérez x wife!reader -> with the influx of hate checo has been receiving lately, he's in desperate need of some comfort

alkaline spin-off -> gg & toto get into a heated argument during a race weekend. toto says some things he can't take back, and boy, does gg hold a grudge

alkaline spin-off -> gg and george get into it and poor toto is caught in the middle. will he defend gg or will he tell her that he's on george's side for this one?

alkaline spin-off -> toto is a bit in his head after discovering some leaked photos of gg with lawrence stroll. was she just being polite or were there ulterior motives?

max verstappen x tennis player!reader -> max is so supportive of his badass girlfriend who happens to be one of the biggest tennis stars in the world

toto wolff x figure skater!au -> toto wolff and his controversial young, hot girlfriend. this time, she's an elite figure skater. nothing but endless fluff and supportive moments!

just a reminder that my requests are always open! if you would like to see your idea come to life, feel free to send a message in my inbox! <3

[faeryarchives]

when your hopeless streamer gets a girlfriend (ace trappola x f!reader)

summary: the rising streamer ace trappola has always been teased by his friends and fans about his failed relationships - that is until one certain stream where each and everyone of them were proven wrong.

note: ok i had this idea at 1 in the morning i was like 'hmmm what if we make a streamer series for twst?' and its just full of fluff and crack like no magic au + everyone is just normal

recent fics: happy birthday (malleus x reader) & so what are we? & in sickness and in health

it was around saturday midnight when everyone should be asleep, but ace trappola decided it was a good time to stream a horror game out of all possible games he could play with his friends. they all started as friends before starting the game but i fear he might have none after the stream.

"crabby, where are you~?" the sound of floyd humming through the mic sent shivers down the boy's back as he tried hiding from the hunter. "it's so funny to see floyd just have this tunnel vision to kill ace." jamil's smooth voice rang out, obviously amuse how the scene was unfolding. 

"oh flooooyd! ace is hiding in the house with the telephone!"

"i hate all of you, after this game i am blocking everyone!" seeing him become the victim in the game and everyone turning on against him, his fans flood the live stream chat with laughing emojis and 'take the l'.

"ace, become a good bait while we fix the car." he heard ruggie and deuce laugh at his misery before their characters ran opposite his direction.

"okay who is the one that said floyd should be the hunter this round? hey, hey, hey! stop chasing after me- am i the only player in this game?! epel is right here!" in an act of desperation, ace tried to hide behind epel's character instead but only to receive massive damage when the attack hit him instead.

"eh... but guppy-chan isn't even trying to run away, which is boring!"

"wait, really?" he then stopped running. ace turned to face the hunter's character, trying to see if floyd would actually kill him, only to notice something wrong a little too late. "heh, gotcha,"  ace screamed into his mic, watching his character gets stuck in the tree and meet his demise as floyd split him into half literally. the words 'you died' appeared on the streamer's screen. 

gloomurai: wow you are so great in this game 🤣

"i see you idia-senpai! it's not my fault they all turned against me!"

wani-sama🔧: it's your karma for selling them out to ruggie last game

"yeah, yeah... well, i'm always the last one to get caught, so this can be pretty relaxing." the streamer smirked as he watched from deuce's point of view where he is currently lost in the woods. 

"i get to watch them die but knowing floyd he might quit mid-game." to used to being the first one out, ace sighed, switching from one point of view to another. bored ou of his mind, he looked at the corner of his screen, ace looked at the comments curiously as they try suggesting things.

muscle-red: why don't you do a q and a while waiting then?

"question and answer? don't you guys basically know me already?" ace looked at the screen intently, contemplating whether he should do it.

"fucking viper i swear!" suddenly someone joined the call causing ace to jump in surprised, only to realize it was ruggie. 

"how did you die?"

"jamil betrayed me because we thought it was a four-seater car. it turns out it was only two!" hearing this, ace turned to jamil's point of view and snickered about how he and epel got chased by the sneaky eel. "welcome to the dead club."

as if he could imagine his senior rolling his eyes at his words, he smirked smugly - karma does bite back hard. "hardy har... what were you doing? i heard something about a question and answer?"

"chat wants me to have another q and a portion, what more do i have to tell you guys?"

cowabunga: how is the search for your beloved mwishxr: there is no use in asking that 

"search for my beloved? hey!"

"shishishi! even your viewers are against you!"

it's a running joke in ace's community on how he was immediately dump by his ex girlfriend one week after dating. it wasn't like he wanted to share the story - he shared it as a batsu game after losing a round of uno. usually, when asked about his search for a girlfriend, ace would get all red and try to defend himself from the single until he became old allegations.

but today was surprising because not only did he not become all flustered and defensive - ace trappola looked smug even as he leaned his head into his palm and laughed.

"hmm, i wonder about that?" from behind, ace could hear approaching footsteps stopping next to him, and the live stream chat went wild and even ruggie who was looking at ace's stream right now watched with wide eyes as someone who was wearing the streamer's well-known sweater stood beside him.

"what the fuck?!"

gloomurai: ?!?!? muscle-red: what is with the sudden plot twist wani-sama🔧: WAIT wani-sama🔧: IS THAT-?!

"heya (nickname)~" ace hummed, turning his gaming chair facing your direction, his arms wrapping themselves around your waist as he grinned at you ever so cheekily. "you're late!"

"what are you five? i don't even know why you want me to come over." you rolled your eyes, trying to push him away playfully, only to run your fingers through his hair and chuckle.

seeing him lazily smiling at you causes you to succumb to your urge to pinch his cheeks - hard, making ace cry out in pain. before you could even ask another question, you saw something flash at the corner of your eye causing you to look at his monitor - realizing that he is still streaming. while holding onto you. and he not even on mute!

"this is all your plan, wasn't..." holding his face in your hands, ace could only laugh and nod, his hand quickly pulling you down, making you sit on his lap as he proudly present you to everyone. "as you can see, i am not hopeless anymore!"

wani-sama🔧: WHAT ARE YOU DOING SIS?!

"how is it possible i could hear sebek through the screen..." you sigh, leaning your back on ace and waved at the camera so casually as if the chat and ruggie weren't surprised at all.

"i just want to say to chat that ace didn't have my family in hostage." with you hand wrapped around his, you put up up and showed it to the camera. "and he is stuck with me."

hearing at just what you said made everyone in the chat go insane erupting into numerous emoji and something with the lines of 'oh my god he is not lying!' or just exclamation but nothing beats the reaction of your friends.

"(name) you settled for a guy like him?!" you could hear ruggie's surprised voice through your boyfriend's headset and honestly, you were contemplating if you would agree or just laugh it off.

"what can i say? sometimes, idiots have their charms."

jamil-viper: i can't believe you got (name) of all people... deuce-spade: oh thank god i don't have to keep it a secret anymore. wani-sama🔧: YOU KNEW?! epel-felmier: i think that's the effect of not our gc !!

the stream goes on with ace finally having his bragging rights and the twitter stans going crazy about the sudden girlfriend reveal. oh well, karma does hit back hard doesn't it?

[yukidragon]

Hello, I started reading your blog not so long ago. I am amazed at how you describe everything in detail, so professionally that your headcannons seem to be canons))

Anyway, I have a question about the game Something's Wrong With Sunny Day Jack. How do you think the characters from this game would help and support us if we (the players, the main characters) were very shy? In terms of any actions, such as expressing your feelings to your partner or intimacy. And not in the sense that we are just embarrassed, but really very timid and do not know how to behave (For example, because of personal feelings or doubts, poor self-esteem and self-doubt, we behave this way). How would the characters in this game support us, help us feel more comfortable and confident?

Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoy my rambles and ideas. 💖

Well a fair number of them are canon to Sunshine in Hell if you want to get technical. Not so much the AUs and random what if scenarios of course. ;3 I just approach the characters and setting through my own lens and what feels right to me, which I apply to the stories I write about them.

Funny enough, having a timid and shy main character suffering from poor self-esteem and lots of self-doubts is at the core of Sunshine in Hell. Alice is a character who is suffering from a lot of hesitance and uncertainty due to past experiences and a lot of toxic aspects of society.

Jack

Jack is incredibly mindful of Alice's needs and boundaries. Thanks to their connection, he can sense when he's doing something to make her uncomfortable and adjust accordingly. This bond their souls have may or may not be canon to the game, but it is canon to my version of the story. In a way it's kind of a cheat for Jack, allowing him insight that other people lack.

Plus Jack is a perceptive, clever man. It was a survival tactic when he was on the street to be able to read others' intentions, and he grew up in a house full of two-faced people as Joseph. He learned what he had to do in order to please people. He knows how to read body language, expressions, tone, etc. so he can tell when someone is feeling positively or negatively. Even if his supernatural "cheat" doesn't give him enough of a hint, he can deduce more from body language.

Jack wants to be there for his sunshine and be everything they could ever want or need. He needs them. He's desperate for their love and to have a purpose, and his very existence is tied to it. This makes him especially mindful of his sunshine's likes, dislikes, and needs.

So depending on the MC, Jack will try to adjust his behavior around them. If they need him to go slower and be more supportive he will. That's why Sunshine in Hell is going to be a slow burn. Alice was not only damaged by societal pressures, but by a toxic relationship with her previous and only partner. Being burned so many times has left her hesitant to make a move that might cause her to feel the flames again.

Jack's go-to to offer support and help his sunshine feel more comfortable is with words. He is the ultimate cheerleader, offering advice when he can, watching out for their health, and of course giving unending praise. He makes sure to tell his sunshine exactly what makes them so beautiful in his eyes and how brightly they shine.

Jack pays attention to even the small details about his sunshine, what they like, what draws their attention, and what they have been able to accomplish. He then shines a spotlight on those parts of MC with plenty of encouraging words and love.

In ways Jack also takes on the guiding, mentor role, especially for a timid MC. After being scarred by Ian and so down on themselves, he needs to work hard to coax open their heart again and let them know that it's okay to love him and to accept his love and support.

A good example is Jack gently guiding his sunshine to his lips when they have the urge to kiss him, then further coaxing that kiss into a deeper one with tongue. He pushes his luck at times, as he's just so NEEDY for his sunshine, but he's hyper focused on their comfort. He won't and can't do anything his sunshine doesn't want to do after all.

Jack certainly is going to encourage any steps his sunshine takes towards him. Using Alice as an example, whenever she reaches out to touch him first, he tries not to call attention to it, since that could make her feel self-conscious and retreat. Instead he offers gentle smiles, returns the touch if he can, and is as encouraging as he can be. He wants to reward every time she gathers up the courage to do more with him.

He's careful not to chase after her when she needs to retreat. While disappointed, Jack knows that Alice needs that space for herself because she's overwhelmed. He instead focuses on redirecting her attention to something less troubling if he can.

Distraction from anxious thoughts are another tactic Jack employs. Redirecting his sunshine's focus to what they do right and how much he loves them can prevent an anxiety spiral that might lead to them retreating from him and his love.

Of course, if their worries and self-doubt start to spiral into a dark direction, Jack will help walk them through it. He wants to share their burdens and be a good friend and partner to them. He wants to be just as vital to their life as they are to his.

Jack's past psychology classes as Joseph help in this regard. He learned techniques about how to calm down a child who is scared or dealing with trauma. It doesn't translate perfectly when dealing with adults, especially since he's constantly trying to be Sunny Day Jack 24/7, but it works with those who aren't turned off by this kids show host persona.

While Jack isn't perfect at it - though he desperately wants to be - letting his own needs and desires for MC bleed through at times, he tries his very best to support them in whatever way they need. He checks in on how they're feeling, even during the most intimate of settings, especially when they're feeling uneasy or uncertain. For Alice, he's just what she needs during her most vulnerable time.

On that note, let's switch to the guy that left Alice feeling so vulnerable in the first place. The question was how all the love interests will support MC after all.

Ian

Ian is... a mess, to put it simply. He tries his level best, but he gets swept up in his own feelings at times, as I've mentioned in previous headcanons, like the big one about sex and love.

Ian knows what it's like to lack confidence and to view himself in a negative light. He's down on himself and very timid. He struggles with expressing himself due to being suppressed for years. He does best when being guided rather than doing the guiding.

With some partners, this could lead to overcompensation. Alice went out of her way to ignore her own needs in order to make him happy and encourage him. This feeling that she had to take care of him pushed her to do things before she felt comfortable or ready.

However, if Alice did voice she wasn't ready for something, Ian would've backed off immediately. He doesn't want to push his partner hard and would feel awful if he did so, likely leading to him crying. He just wants to be a good partner and fears he's not good enough for her... or anyone.

In a way, Ian then becomes the perfect person to relate to an MC who lacks confidence. He understands these insecurities all too well and can share in that experience. He knows just how hard it is to overcome that awful voice in one's head that says you're not good enough. He related to Alice and her worries about her appearance. He always made sure to let her know that he loves her regardless of what society finds weird or ugly, such as her weight or how she might act at times.

Ian reassured Alice that he only ever found her attractive. He struggles to put things into words at times though, especially due to his shyness. Other people are "weird" in his eyes, so he could never want to be with them like he wants to be with her.

Ian is someone very excited for physical intimacy, and once he is given the green light, he tends to take the lead in his enthusiasm. This can allow MC to not worry about making decisions when he lets his urges and emotions lead the way. He also doesn't shy away from telling MC just how much he loves them and how good they make him feel.

Even if MC doesn't feel confident in their appearance, Ian knows them. They grew up together. They've been his strength when he was weak. They might think badly of themselves, but he sees them as his hero. They've done so much for him, been there with him through his worst moments, and gave him the strength to pursue his dreams. They shine so brightly in his eyes. He's not afraid to let them know that they are the best thing to ever happen to him.

Which makes it all the worse that he cheated, but shhh, that's not what this post is about.

Shaun

Speaking of which, that gives a good segue to switch over to Shaun. After Ian cheated, I can imagine MC's self-image and confidence would be at its lowest. Fortunately, Shaun was there to offer support and words of encouragement. He makes it clear that he cares and he's there for them, always.

Shaun knows that MC deserves so much better than to feel like garbage. He's a big ball of sunshine, and he takes the lead with a friend or partner who is struggling to keep up. He is very encouraging with physical touch, such as hugs, cuddles, and ear scritches. His purring can serve as a very nice reward for MC when they have the courage to get a bit more physical with him.

Shaun tries to keep things light most of the time, mainly because he's wallpapering over his own issues. He's bold and energetic, and that can help distract MC from their own worries and hesitation.

Of course, Shaun isn't one to avoid a difficult conversation just because it's hard. He wants to talk through what's bothering with MC and help them work through their issues. If they don't want to discuss it though, he'll let the topic drop for something that they're more comfortable with.

If MC is open for it, Shaun is ready to give bear hugs whenever they want. He's got the strength to scoop up even the heaviest of besties. If they don't want it though, he'll show his support by buying them lunch or talking about something fun.

Another perk Shaun has is kitty therapy. Not only is he cat-coded, with his whisker marks, kitty eyes, and ability to purr, but he has sweet baby Moon Pie. What better way to soothe a nervous MC than with a kitty cuddle puddle with a precious furbaby in their lap while he cuddles them both close?

When it comes to intimacy, Shaun leans towards being a daddy dom. He's good about checking in though, making sure that MC is feeling comfortable. This goes for platonic moments too. It might be easy to get swept up in his flow, but he's very mindful of those he cares about. He's the type to take charge of things so that everyone gets fair treatment and feels comfortable.

When it comes to insecurities and MC being down on themselves, it'd come to a surprise to Shaun that they feel that way. He doesn't see these supposed flaws they have. Oh, he believes they see these flaws in themselves, but he certainly doesn't, and he's sure no one else who matters does either.

If MC wants or needs Shaun to take the lead, he's more than happy to do so. He can be his kitten's daddy dom if they want him to be~ If they need to take it slower and make the first move, he'll let them. Shaun is so worried about how MC feels that he's swallowed his crush on them for years. He doesn't want to lose his friendship with them just because of his feelings.

Shaun does have plenty of confidence in himself, but he's mindful that's not a guarantee of anything. It's also not an excuse to cross boundaries. Emotions are more complicated than that, and success plus a good appearance doesn't make someone necessarily appealing to everyone in all ways. His uncle is someone successful, well respected, and charismatic, but is very abrasive, as an example. He loves the man, but also can't trust him.

Shaun knows what it's like to be hesitant to trust someone. That's why he works hard to be someone that can be trusted. He wants to be liked and to help people to feel relaxed around him. It's what makes him a good friend and an attentive lover. He'll do his best to encourage a timid MC to do what they want, even if he might long for something more. He can keep his feelings in check to make sure that they're both comfortable.

Nick

On that sweet note, let's switch over to Nick. Granted, I haven't gone into Nick's backstory a lot as of yet due to his role in things, and my thoughts on him have evolved a lot over time, but he's a sweetheart overall in my headcanon land. While he has this influencer persona online, and a sexy, confident dom on LonelyFans, he is actually a bit timid when taking off those masks. He knows what it's like to feel easily flustered, so he does his best to disarm those feelings, letting MC know it's okay.

Nick does his best not to put pressure on MC. While he does ask MC out while at work, it was at a moment that felt right after some good chemistry between them. He backs off right away at being turned down and respects boundaries.

Nick was drawn to MC by how cute they are. He wants to learn more about them as himself, not as his online persona. He understands the pressure to perform, to push himself further to live up to expectations. He wants to remove that pressure from others in his life, especially his partner.

However, Nick's experiences with LonelyFans, especially personal shows with his followers, has given him experience on how to dish out praise. He's learned how to make various people feel good and cater to different tastes. He's dealt with shy customers before, and he knows how to take charge when they need him to be the strong dom, and when to be that sweet and seductive voice in their ear letting them know that they're doing a good job.

Nick tries to balance what he learned from his online persona with his real, kind of awkward self. When he's in a relationship offline, he tries his best to be his authentic self and not so much the dom persona. He'll do his best to encourage MC to be themselves too. He wants that authentic connection with someone. This means accepting that their authentic self can be a bit clumsy and uncomfortable with themselves.

While Shaun is more bombastic and energetic, Nick is more chill. He goes with the flow more, allowing things to slow down to a less stressful pace. After all, the online space is constant go, go, go, and he enjoys the space to breathe and just experience a genuine moment when offline. He helps MC feel more confident by helping them find space to breathe and slow down too. They don't have to rush when they're with him.

If they need Nick in dom mode he can do that, but he'd rather save that for when he's in the headspace to switch to that persona. He might teasingly switch to it during casual moments though, especially if MC let him know they need an extra nudge at times to get going.

Overall, all the guys are mindful of MC's boundaries. If they say they don't want to do something, they won't push it. They also check to make sure they're doing okay. They're encouraging and genuinely think MC is amazing. For all the love interests' individual flaws, they do try to do their best for the people they care about. They might fumble at times and make mistakes, but they do want MC to feel happy and confident in themselves.

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

[turcott3]

worst behavior

cole sillinger x fem! reader

warnings?: cursing, arguing, smut: oral fem receiving, unprotected sex, hair pulling, overstimulation, slightest tiniest bit of fluff

positions fics masterlist

~this ain’t no game, won’t play with you. this time i know ill stay with you~

-

your eyes fluttered open to a room filled with sunlight. you stretched out and rolled over, running into something. you finally process what’s going on and look around the room, not recognizing a single piece of it.

“where am i?” you whisper, looking at the body next to you. an ohio state hockey player who’s name you vaguely recalled, but that didn’t matter because someone definitely saw you leave with him.

fuck.

“hmm.” you hear the boy groan next to you.

“good morning.” you say scooting away from him.

“morning beautiful.” he says opening his eyes and smiling at you, your heart almost fluttering at those words. cole never uttered them to you.

“sleep good?” you ask as he leans up on his elbow.

“i did, last night was incredible.” he says kissing you on the cheek. that’s when it all came flooding back. his gentlemanly gestures roped you in. he opened the car door for you, he was sweet, overall seemed like someone you’d actually want to be with. until you remembered that you had never betrayed your….. whatever it was, to cole.

“i’m gonna get a shower, you can stay here or raid the kitchen. my home is yours.” he says smiling at you.once the bathroom door shuts, you scramble to collect your clothes, putting them on, grabbing your phone, and sneaking out the door as quickly as possible. you had been fucking cole for a few months now and would never dare to betray your loyalty to him. he was like a drug to you, and you were addicted. not that he could say the same for you as much as you wished he would. you had no car and didn’t know where you were, but you couldn’t call cole, so you chose the next best option. adam.

“hello?”

“yes hey adam, so it’s a long story but can i send you my location? i don’t know where i am and i have no transportation.”

“yeah of course i can. are you okay?”

“yeah i just have a bad feeling that someone is gonna know about what happened and i really wanna just pretend it never happened. i’ll tell you in the car.”

“y/n it’s gonna be fine, don’t worry. send me your location and i’ll be there.”

“sent. thank you so much adam, seriously.”

“no problem, i don’t want you to get kidnapped or anything.” he laughs.

“thank you, bye adam.”

“bye.” he says and you hang up. what were you going to tell cole? you check and see only one missed call and two texts from him. everyday you hoped he would grow more desperate for your attention, but the day still never came. once adam arrived at your location, you get into his car and buckle without a word.

“so what happened?” he says putting the car back into drive and pulling off.

“i went to a party last night,”

“like the one some of the guys and i went to?”

“yes that one, and i guess i got drunk and came back with a fucking ohio state hockey player, but he was so sweet and nice and gentlemanly.”

“ohio state really?” adam asks.

“adam, that’s what you’re concerned about?” you say smacking him on the arm.

“hey that’s serious dude,”

“that is the least of my worries right now. what if cole finds out? someone had to have seen me leave with him.”

“has he called you?”

“yeah.”

“when?”

“like 2 hours ago.”

“he knows.” he simply states.

“i mean maybe he doesn’t.”

“check your voicemail.” he says going silent, you listened in and he didn’t go into specifics but he seemed angry.

“well shit, i’ll go see him tomorrow,” you say

“probably a good idea.” he replies, the rest of the drive was mostly silent. how were you supposed to make an excuse for this?

-

the next day came and you were terrified. once you arrive at his house, you step up to the door but before your knuckles could hit the wooden surface, it opens.

“look who finally decided to show up.” he says stepping out of the way so you could walk inside.

“look cole i-“

“i don’t wanna hear it.”

“what do you mean?”

“an excuse, so you’re gonna tell me what the fuck happened the other night.”

“well i-“

“spit it out.” he says stepping closer.

“why do you care so much?” you ask.

“just answer the fucking question.”

“fine. that night, i got drunk at the party, you would know bc you were there. you had girls surrounding you, this lovely guy came up to me. he was super sweet and respectful so i went home with him.”

“oh so you’re fucking him now too?”

“well i obviously haven’t gone back to him, nor do i have his number. is that what you want to hear?”

“no.”

“take me on a date, just once, and i’ll forget i even looked in his direction.” you begged. you didn’t want your time with cole to end. you never wanted it to if you could help it.

“i want you forget he ever even fucking existed y/n.”

“just take me out one time cole.” you beg, and his stance doesn’t change.

“did he fuck you good?” he says smirking, changing the topic.

“well it was okay, he was very sweet though. i love that in a guy, just pure sweetness.”

“so he didn’t fuck you like i do?”

“maybe he did.” you shrug, knowing it was a flat out lie.

“oh really?” he scoffs, grazing his hands around your waist, facing inching closer to yours.

“he could never come close to what i give you.” he says lowly, connecting your lips. instantly, you cave at his touch. your arms wrapping around the back of his neck. he bites your lip as he pulls away looking into your eyes. he picks you up, wrapping your legs around his waist and carries you to his room, shutting the door and locking it behind him. he tosses you on the bed, immediately pulling your shirt off over your head and throwing it as he does the same.

“i just really like when a guy is sweet, you don’t understand that?” you say interrupting the tangible silence in the room.

“no i do.”

“sure doesn’t seem like it.”

“well maybe i can be sweet.” he retorts.

“ha sure you can.” you scoff as he walks over to the bad, towering over you.

“you just don’t get to find out right now.” he smirks, crawling onto the bed and attaching his lips to your neck, nipping and sucking at the skin. your hands find their way into his hair, tugging on hit lightly as you grew more and more anxious for him to get the ball rolling. he unclasped your bra with one hand and helps you out of it, tossing it across the room. he hooks his fingers under the bands of your underwear and he slides them down you legs quickly before removing his own underwear.

“you want me to fuck you baby?”

“yes, please cole.” you say practically in a whisper as he bends down, his tongue making contact with your dripping core. his tongue working in circles on your clit, his sheets now clenched in your fists. suddenly sliding two fingers into you, curling them causing your back to arch, a loud moan ripping from your throat, already edging a climax. out of nowhere, he pulls his fingers out backing away from you, sucking your juices off his fingers before crawling over you and kissing you sloppily.

“no please why’d you stop?” you whine.

“just had to get you ready.” he smirks pulling away, running his leaking tip through your soaked folds.

“you gonna be good for me pretty girl?” he asks.

“i am.” you say quietly.

“good.” he smirks before pushing into you without warning, a galaxy forming behind your eyelids, your legs hooking around his hip.

“fuck.” you say gripping onto his arms. his thrusts were deep and hard.

“so good just for me.” he grunts out in broken up speech. you open your eyes and lock contact with his, moaning uncontrollably as he hit the sensitive spongey spot deep inside you with each thrust.

“fuck cole oh my god.” you say, the only words you could possibly muster up. you were overstimulated in the best way, sex with cole was always amazing but he was really outdoing himself this time. he leans down, attaching your lips to his to silence your moans as your climax creeped closer and closer.

“god you’re so fucking hot.” he says locking eyes with you again, before you roll your eyes into the back of your head trying to hold off the orgasm that threatened to rip through your body.

“cole i-“

“do it. come for me.” he says and on queue you see stars, your body relaxing all the tightness it previously felt. he fucked you all the way through your high, thinking that was the end.

“you think we’re done here? i’m not done with you.” he says slowing down and pulling out of you, picking you up and tossing you onto your stomach. you raise yourself up in your hands and knees weakly, knowing exactly what he wanted. he places his calloused hand on your ass, using the other to help push himself into you swollen core.

“fuck.” you scream as his hips slam into you quickly.

“yeah you like that?”

“fuck yes i do.” you say, kicking back into high gear, his hips slamming into your ass, his thick cock somehow hitting deeper than before, stretching you out with each thrust. your arms give out and your chest hits the bed, arching your back to keep your position for him.

“god damn look at you.” he says, the smirk lining his voice. his hand reaches into your hair, gathering it around his hand as he pulls you back up, you arms barely holding your weight as he pulls your back closer to his chest until you’re flush against his front side, his other hand holding you up while his fingers found their way to your clit. you couldn’t conjure any words, your hand found the back of his neck as he grunts sweet nothings into your ear, feeling your orgasm approach once again.

“fuck cole i’m gonna come.” you force out. he lets go of your hair and you fall back onto your arms, your walls clenching around him.

“come for me, come baby.” he says and you do as you’re told once again, your arms shaking as he spills his seed deep into your cervix.

“oh my god.” you say as he pulls out of your overly stimulated core rolling you over, your legs shaking frantically. you’d never been fucked that good a day in your life and you were wishing you could feel it again already.

“so, does he fuck you like i can?” he asks again breathlessly and you shake your head quickly, not being able to speak up.

“use your words baby.” he smirks, climbing over you, his face a mere 4 inches from yours, his hair grazing your forehead lightly.

“he could never.” you say pulling his chain bringing him in for another kiss.

“let’s get you cleaned up.” he says smiling as you pull apart. typically, he says this and wipes you clean with a rag, sending you on your way so you didn’t expect much. he puts his boxers on and walks into the bathroom, soaking a rag with warm water before returning, wiping you clean gently. he tosses the rag into his hamper and hands you your lace thing off the floor and a blue jackets tshirt.

“cole wha-“

“no no, take it seriously.” he says and you take it from him hesitantly, pulling it over your head. careful, he removes your hair from the neck, and brushes it behind your shoulders.

“what’s all this?” you say, shocked that you were even still at his house.

“showing you that i can be sweet.” he smirks, pulling you by the shirt into a sweet kiss.

“i’m usually gone by now.”

“well maybe this time you should stay.”

“are you sure?”

“yeah why not.” he says leaning back on his head board, opening his arms for you to join him. you lay your head on his chest as your arm drapes over his body, his hand gently rubbing up and down your back.

“why have you never let me stay before?” you say looking up at him, breaking the silence.

“i didn’t know what you wanted from me, until today.”

“what do you mean?”

“i thought you just wanted to be around me for sex.” he shrugs, looking down at you.

“well maybe at first but it grew to much more than that. i don’t think i’ve ever regretted anything more than fucking that dude the other night but i mean to be fair i thought all you wanted from me was sex too.”

“it was for a while but feelings change you know.” he laughs slightly.

“so?”

“so what?” he asks obliviously.

“are you gonna take me out?” you say giving the man puppy dog eyes. he rolls his eyes laughing lightly.

“yes y/n, ill take you out.” he giggles, kissing you on the head. it brought you peace knowing that he had feelings for you too, but maybe you should be on your worst behavior more often…..

[richarlotte]

High Class Dating.

I’m spending the summer interning in New York before I move to California and I’ve not had any trouble at all when it comes to getting dates, meeting men, or being taken out. I do sugar date and date hypergamously because if you’ve not leveled up your dating game in 2024, you’re missing out. I think it’s imperative to only except dates with men that make you feel good, have good careers and have something to offer, and make an effort to treat you like a lady. 2024 is the decade of the black woman and I know what I want so it’s time for me to get it. I’ve been dating since I was 18, I’m not a love guru by any means but I hold my own, and I love going out and having a good time with high quality men who will treat me well and show me their lifestyle.

My Stats.

As a background, here are my stats: I’m about 5’11 and weigh 140 pounds, I’m dark skin, and I have alopecia (I do wear a wig). Am I drop dead gorgeous? I’m not Jasmine Tookes but I’m confident and love the way I look, I’ve taken time to level up, I have a good workout routine and a toned body, and I’ve made strides with my personal style and makeup skills over the past few years. I’m happy to make posts related to the process that I went through when I started leveling up, the changes I made to my style and to my makeup routine, and the workout routine and some of the food I eat to keep myself healthy and motivated. I don’t believe in dating out of desperation and I think that it’s always important to make an effort if you are a woman; if you make an effort and know your audience then you’ll find that it’s easier to meet people and go to better places.

A few of my dates.

I went to lunch at the Penn Club with a man who I met on Hinge. He’s a successful young plastic surgeon and we spoke for two days before he asked me out on his first day off. He was tall, had big brown eyes and a strong jaw, handsome, an excellent conversationalist, and very intelligent. He made such an effort to take me somewhere beautiful, treat me well, and make sure that I was having fun and he had so much potential. I really liked our date and think it’s one of the best I’ve been on since I landed in New York for my internship.

I went to Martha’s Vineyard for Fourth of July weekend with another date. His family owns a huge house on the island and I’d mentioned to him that I wanted to go somewhere that felt luxurious so he invited me and a few of my friends to visit. It was a beautiful long weekend and I got to do so much; we swam, cooked, watched the fireworks, danced, listened to so much good music, and got to know each other better. I love a man who comes for money and has his own money but is still humble and he is the definition of a good guy.

I feel like every girl has her own story about going out with an NHL player but OMG let me tell you mine. I went out with a Swedish NHL player and these wealthy Scandinavian men and athletes love black women. People will try to say that they only like thin blondes but this man treated me like a princess, he still sends me gifts, he got me tickets for the Stanley Cup finals, and he’s an angel with the most beautiful accent I’ve ever heard. I slid into his DMs on IG and then he was messaging me an hour later, liking all my pics, and asking me if I’ve ever been to Sweden. I’m going to try to go visit Stockholm in December to try to see him during Christmas when I know he’ll be back at home.

How I meet men.

I use Bumble, Hinge, and the good old-fashioned way of leading people in person. I can do a post on the best way I’ve met people in person and some of the venues I like. I think everyone who reads this will agree that there’s just something about a man who treats you well, is strong, and has a thick wallet and good looks. Every girl deserves a guy like that and I think it’s important that black women do not take any bullshit and don’t compromise on what they want. There are men out there who would drop everything in their hands to do something for me, the princess treatment isn’t a myth at all, and I have met so many men who are able and willing to invest in me and my lifestyle. Again, if you know what you want, then you’re going to get it but you have to be willing to put the work in.

Richarlotte x

[celticcrossanon]

BRF Reading - 12th of May, 2024

This is speculation only

Cards drawn on the 12th of May, 2024

Question: What does Harry want from this Nigerian visit?

Interpretation: He wants to use it to makes things go back the way they used to be, and he wants to be the centre of attention.

Card One: Death in reverse

Death is a card of change, of moving from one state to another with no way to go back, of letting go of things. In the reverse, it is someone who does not want to change, who is not letting go of things, who is repeating negative patterns, and who wants to return to a previous state.

Death is the card of Scorpio, and King Charles is a sun sign Scorpio, so I am taking this card as referring to King Charles in particular as well as things in general.

The energy of this card is of someone who does not want things to change, who wants to go back to the way things used to be. Harry does not want his position and privileges to change. He would like very much to go back to being treated as he was treated when he was a working royal. I hear the words 'I want to go home', but 'home' is the days of Hero Harry and being the most popular royal. Harry can't return to those days - he has shown us too clearly what he is really like for that to happen - but he wants to go back to those days.

With respect to The King, Harry wants to go back to the days when honours were set aside for him and given to him, when houses were provided for him, when he was included as a member of the BRF. He wants his father to treat him the way he used to, not like he is doing now, e.g. giving military honours to Prince William and not to Harry. I know and you know that Harry lost all that when he left the BRF, but it appears that Harry did not know this, and he honestly thought he could go and be a 'private citizen' and still have military honours awarded to him by the King, keep his houses and his patronages, etc. He wants to go back to those days and there is a lot of puzzlement coming through as to why they are not happening any more. He can't understand what he did to be punished in this way (he views the lack of more military honours, free housing etc as a punishment). In his mind, all he did was tell the truth, just like he had always been told to do, so why is he being punished for it?

With respect to the Nigeria visit, I think that Harry is desperately trying to show his father that he can behave like a royal, so please won't you let me back in to the BRF as a working royal with all my old perks and privileges?

Card Two: The Three of Pentacles in reverse

The Three of Pentacles is about teamwork, three or more people working together to achieve a goal, putting in the effort to make something. In the reverse, it is someone who is not a team player, who is in competition with those around them, driven by their ego, and/or lacks any motivation to do any hard work.

The energy coming from this card, very strongly, is 'not a team player'. Harry wants to be seen as unique and special, not part of a crowd (or a team) but as the leader, the inspiration, the one everyone looks up to. He also has no intention of putting in any hard work, preferring to sit back and let others do that for him.

Harry wants this trip to show what a unique, special, and inspirational person he is, and how he deserves a special place set above everyone else just because of who he is naturally. He wants to be treated as someone special. The energy from the card hints that this goal has been accomplished and Harry is satisfied with his reception in Nigeria - it has highlighted how wonderful he is to his satisfaction (it could have been better, of course, but he is not upset with what he was given).

Card Three: The Eight of Pentacles, in reverse

The Eight of Pentacles is the apprentice card. It is about gaining mastery, learning and honing your skills, having high standards for yourself and others and striving to meet them. In the reverse, it is about being lazy, not learning and not honing your skills, wasting your talents, a rushed job/poor quality goods, having little or no motivation to improve yourself, mediocrity.

The energy from this card is that of laziness. So much laziness. Harry does not want to work, he does not want to learn, he does not want to improve himself. He is mediocre at best and sub standard at worst but he thinks he is top quality and perfectly OK exactly the way he is.

Harry did not want to do any work at all for this visit. He was happy to turn up and be praised and admired, but there was never any intention of putting any effort into it. He does not want to learn about the country, the people, their problems - he does not want to know about it. He wants to turn up for a few things and be admired and praised. He doesn't want people to expect him to work or do anything that involves making an effort.

Card Four: The Pages of Wands

Pages are messages, Wands can be PR, upright is good news. Harry wants good PR from this trip. He wants glowing media reports on whatever he does or doesn't do. He wants fawning, bootlicking, over-the-top sugary articles about how wonderful he is and how much he is loved and what an inspiration he is, and if he gets that he will be happy.

Underlying Energy: The Sun in reverse

The Sun card is about optimism, success, everything going right, warmth, being the golden child (as Apollo, on the card, is the favoured son of Zeus), joy, confidence, vitality. In the reverse it is about not being the golden child, pessimism, things not going right, depression, sadness. It can also be being conceited or being over-optimistic.

The energy from this card is of someone who absolutely wants to be the centre of attention and have people fawning over him where ever he goes. It is either a message from the universe that Harry is being over-optimistic in what he wants from this visit, or it is that Harry wants to be conceited, he wants to be bombastic and talk on and on and on while people around him are smothering their yawns, he wants to be surrounded by yes -men who will pander to his conceits.

The Sun is the card of The Sun, the ruling planet of Leo, and Meghan is a sun-sigh Leo. This card is not about Meghan, though. It is about Harry. In astronomy, The Sun is your self, your ego, your core values etc. The less evolved aspects of The Sun involve being arrogant, conceited, egotistic, full of yourself, demanding all the attention be on you, etc, and this appears to be exactly how Harry wants to behave on this visit - and to get approval for it, as The Sun card can also be about other people approving of you and saying yes to you.

Conclusion:

Harry wants four things from this trip to Nigeria. He wants to be lazy, i.e. not asked to do any work, he wants to be treated as someone special and inspirational, he wants glowing PR, and he wants to show his father that he can behave like a royal so he will be let back into the BRF and everything will be the way it used to be. The 'back in the family' ask is the underlying motive, the other three are things that he wants all the time.

Underneath all this is a need to be conceited and self absorbed and have people agree with him, to display the traits of ego, arrogance, demand all the attention etc and have everyone just smile and not just go along with it, but actively pander to him. If he gets all this from the Nigeria trip then he will consider it a success.

[heavynightshade]

sam likes broken toys

pairing. sam winchester x ofc!hunter summary. ofc is on the verge of a nervous breakdown, but she doesn't seem to know. word count. 1200 a/n. it's written in first person, but i believe it can be read as "x reader". also, english isn't my first language and im currently watching the second season of supernatural. tags. angst with a happy ending, i think

chapter 2 | chapter 3 (soon)

Why in the nine circles of hell is Sam Winchester laughing at the blonde at the bar? I personally wouldn't know. God, why a blonde? Dean loves to say that I have some kind of complex with everyone who has too little melanin in their hair and make it everyone else's problem. Whatever.

We're somewhere in the backwoods of Louisiana, hunting some kind of vengeful spirit. Supposedly a father who killed his entire family and then killed himself. We only have a few problems: Dean's car broke down, my laptop stopped working and the bones of the father in question are missing. What a great week!

When I enter the bar where we agreed to meet, I avoid staring too much, like, I don't want to seem desperate or psychotic, so, I go straight to the side of the bar where Dean is.

"A beer, please," I ask the bartender.

"On the house, sweetie," he answers.

Well, I'm not ugly, seriously. But I've had better times. Surprising.

I could have sworn I saw Sammy's back tense for a second, but then he just turned and nodded at me. Whatever. I'm going crazy (unofficially).

"You seem absolutely disturbed, especially today," Dean starts a conversation while looking at the waitress with a certain hunger.

"We have to work, you know?" I sigh. "Disgusting!"

"We don't have anything similar to the internet in this backwater, and the library is protected by Fort Knox for some reason," he takes a sip of his drink. "And you know, he's only attacked on even-numbered days so far. So happy Friday the 13th! Go relax."

Dean smiles and walks towards the waitress who had passed by seconds ago. Oh, my god, something tells me not to wait up for him. Kids, — he's older than me — grow up so quickly…

Sometimes I think about the dream I had the other night. Sure, I've dreamed about the brothers a few times, usually about the hunts, and it ends with someone almost, or actually getting killed. Sometimes I kill them, when I take the place of the monster of the week. My psychiatrist probably has some opinion on this, but whatever, I could handle a nightmare. Sure, beat the trauma once or twice a week.

But this time, it was even worse. I had sex with Sam, or rather, he fucked me brainless. He corrupted my dignity. And for God's sake, the memories alone are enough to make me cry, again. I’m afraid to even look at his face. The shame could kill me. Thinking about it, death seems like a pretty funny experience, you know. That didn't matter, right now he was apparently having a lot of fun with someone else, and he would probably have a lot more fun soon.

Yeah. Sammy deserves better.

Sam was still caught up in the conversation with the blonde. My crush on him was probably reaching levels that were much less mature and less feminist than I should have expected, which is detestable. I like to be someone with ideals, and I would like those ideals to resist a 6'4" man who looks like a walking encyclopedia. We need more sisterhood!

Fuck it.

Of course the jealousy made me sick. Every second by their side is enough to make me even sicker. Oh my God, I'm burning. I hated blondes and the only exception I can make is Stevie Nicks.

I have poor self-control, when it comes to candies, tequila, Chesterfield Black and Sam Winchester.

I look at the analog clock on the wall, a big red one that matches my lipstick. After all, I don't think it's good to have personality crises early, but, I mean, it was already past 11pm.

After that I ordered a shot of whiskey and headed over to a pool table. In fact, I am an excellent player. If the Winchesters can have fun, why can't I do the same?

Can manage to laugh a little with some guys for a few minutes. Yeah, maybe I prayed a little that one of them would want to sleep with me. I could be good at something.

As I go to bend down for the next move, a hand weighs down on my arm. I instinctively use the bat to hit him, but I'm partially unarmed, so the blow doesn't have full force.

"Why are you doing this to me?" His gaze makes my body burn. As if I was being judged on Doomsday, the only difference was that I cared about the future when it comes to him.

"Sam? What? No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." I mumble a few words. When did he get here?

"Why are you torturing me, Ivy?”

Ivy, like poison ivy, I thought. Sam told me once that I was filled with poison but blessed with beauty and rage. He was drunk as fuck, or it as me? I avoided thinking. I am not able to deal with things. I have not been able to for a long time. I’m no good.

I can barely think of a response as he drags me across the room. Sam's soft eyes and brusque attitude leave me confused. And I just let him lead me. Unfortunately, I trust him.

Sometimes alcohol makes me shaky, and this was the only reasonable explanation for what was happening now. I'm confused and in nicotine withdrawal, I keep telling myself, again, and again. I'm shaking.

Outside the bar, sam, lets go of me, almost throwing me against the wall, but he doesn't. His puppy dog eyes, he's so gentle. Gentler than I ever deserved. Perhaps, his kindness was the real violence.

“Listen, Sammy, I’m sorry, again, I didn't mean to hit you” Actually, I’m not sure about what to say.

“I won't tolerate your shit this time”

What the actual fuck?

“Don't look at me like that. Day after day you've been killing yourself. Acting like you hate this life. Hating each and every one of us. Hating Dean. Hating me.” His voice trembles. Sam runs his hands through his hair, like he's going to die if he doesn't speak up now. ”God, why don't you accept help? Why do you carry this weight on your shoulders alone?”

“Calm down, Sam. I'm a grown woman. I'm fine, I swear. The last week has just been stressful, that's-”

“Shut up! Jesus! You drank so much, as if some kind of dry law was going to start tomorrow! You only eat shit and don't get me started on the night terrors” He sighs “Fuck, I wish I could distance myself from you a little.”

“Why are you saying these things?” My eyes were watering, but I didn't want him to see me crying. Damn it.

“Because maybe if I could stay away from you, maybe I could love you less, and not care about you destroying yourself day after day.”

My face was wet with tears, but I couldn't understand the reason. I wanted to speak but I couldn't. unable to formulate a coherent thought and express it.

“But you know what? There is no corner of the earth that will keep your name from burning in my memory. I will never be able to be far enough away from you.” Then he hugs me, and I lose track of time as I cry. “I'll always be your friend, Ivy.”

a/n. thank u so much for reading. lmk what you think!! im planning make this a three chapters history, so if u have any suggestions feel free to tell me!

[crownedtargaryen]

tear you apart. modern werewolf!cregan

pairing: modern werewolf!cregan x reader (a/n): i’ll be honest i really didn’t wanna write this cause i am in no way a cregan enjoyer (idk why i just cant get into him) so im sorry if this feels lazy CW: p in v sex, breeding kink, mentions of blood, overstimulation if you squint, kinda a lot tbh he’s a beast. prns: she/her words: 1.3k tag list: @clairacassidy @ad-astra-again @hopelesswritergall @howyouloveyourdragon @daenerysapologist @twizzy123

Being with Cregan Stark was both a treat and a nightmare. A popular hockey player with a more reserved girl seemed like an unexpected match. If his team wins a game, you sit on the couch at this party. You watch the sweaty and shaggy men loiter and flirt loosely, Cregan trying to include me. You stare at him and smile as you softly reject his request. Though, he was a bit of an idiot when it came to understanding others' feelings, completely blind to negative emotions.

He's lucky he's attractive.

You sit on the couch, idly sipping the alcoholic beverage that rests in the red cup between your fingers, staring at the boys. With his shaggy dark hair and beautifully shaped facial hair, Cregan stood out. His toned muscles gleamed in the minimal light around him. You couldn't help the swelling feeling between your legs. Every time sex was brought up, Cregan avoided urges like the plague. You were unsure why since he'd called you his "destined mate." If you both were so destined to be together, why does he avoid intimacy like a plague?

That is, until tonight.

Something in him changes as he comes down from some high, his chest heaving as his hands clench into fists. Robb is nearby and spots a behavioral change. Quickly, you watch as he rushes towards Jon, whose eyes widen in surprise. What's happening? Did he get hurt?

You get up, heading for Cregan to check on him. But, before you reach him, a strong hand pulls you back. You turn around, looking at Jon Snow's familiar face, Cregan's distant half-cousin.

"We're leaving," he says sternly, his voice smooth like silk. You shake your head looking at Cregan. You only see him as Robb drags him off, his eyes fiery and full of something you can't place. When he looks at you, he's practically clawing Robb to get to you, a power trip between the two.

"I came here with Cregan! I can't just leave him," you snap, Jon's brows furrowing as he grabs you tighter and forcefully drags you off to his car.

"I'll get your things, just stay here and behave," he says, pushing me into the back seat and getting into the front, not saying another word. Despite your abundance of questions, Jon stays silent and stern. Is Cregan okay? What's happening? Why can't I see him? This is unfair, you have to tell me! Jon doesn't budge, continuing his one-track mind as you fall quiet, not dwelling on what you've just seen.

When you walk into the Stark house, it's a scattered mess. Arya and Sansa are whispering to each other, which silences when you enter, Robb, Jon, and Ned are all rushing around from Cregan's room to the kitchen, and Catelyn is sitting with the girls in dead silence. You hear the women ushering you to join them, to stay downstairs, but you don't obey. Slowly, you walk up the stairs to Cregan's room.

A shaky hand touches the hot doorknob as you open it slowly, spotting Cregan tied to the bed with anything they can, his chest bare and heaving desperately as his eyes hold a soft yellow hue that glares into your soul. Your heart pounds, closing the door and locking it quickly, rushing to Cregan and furrowing your brows.

"What the fuck is this?! What's going on?" You say with pained confusion. Cregan whimpers under your eyes like a dog, his jaw clenching as his hips push into the air. That's when you notice. His hands hold claws, sharp like an animal’s, yellow-hued eyes staring eagerly into yours, and his raging hard-on that hurt in his pants. It all made sense; why he was tied down, why the women stayed away while the men went around.

He wasn't a human.

You take your hand, placing it on Cregan's cheek, his body blazing hot as he moans and nuzzles into your palm, taking in the scent of your wrist. His k-9 teeth seemed more prominent now as he nipped at your skin with a desperate look in his eyes. You shiver with delight, biting your lip and moving in to kiss him, a banging on the door trailing your thoughts away.

Fuck it.

You ignore the knock, untying Cregan. Within seconds he's on you, his arms cradling your torso and his clawed hands trailing up your shirt. He cups at your breasts through your bra's flimsy lace.

"Mine," he growls lowly, pressing his hard-on to your clothed cunt, grinding his hips slowly. "Breed. Please." He looks at you, only barely restraining himself from forcing this upon you.

You moan in delight, tilting your head back as you return his waist movements tenfold, nodding quickly. "Yes, your mate," you whisper, lips parting slightly as a pathetic whimper escapes your lips. "Take me, Cregan. Please." The plea barely escapes your lips as he pins you against the bed, hands ripping off your clothing like an animal. You ignore the banging on the door, shivering at the heat rushing onto your skin, Cregan tearing off your underwear and pants, tossing the torn-apart clothing to the floor as she sheds his trousers, underwear nowhere to be seen. He grabs your thighs, pulling you up roughly and his mouth immediately abusing your throbbing cunt, tongue lapping at your folds and rolling in circles on your swollen clit, a euphoric groan emerging from him as those yellow eyes glare into yours, forcing you to keep your gaze locked with his. His tongue plunges inside of you, juices squirting onto the muscle as he fists his cock eagerly, grinding into his palm. You sink into the sheets, panting desperately and rolling your hips into his mouth, your thighs trembling. His claws dig into your thighs, harsh enough to prick the skin and draw small bits of blood.

With a filthy pop, he moves off your cunt too early for your liking. But, his regard for your pleasure is now extinct. You can't speak before his cock plunges into you. It took everything out of him not to rail at you. His eyes stare into yours, pushing you into a mating press and his eyes attempting to not roll back in his skull, sweat dripping from his tan muscles and down his freckled shoulders and face, shaggy dark hair dangling in front of your face as his cross necklace dangles in your face, almost taunting you to sink into this sin. Slowly, you grind your hips to tell him to start moving, which he gladly does with an animalistic growl, keeping deep and lustful eye contact as he slams his hips to yours, filthy wet slapping noises filling the room as his lips move to your neck, nipping at the fragile skin.

"Could rip you apart," he whispers, excitement coursing through you. "Tear your pretty body to shreds if I wanted." He slams harder into your cunt, making you whimper and scream his name, clawing red swelling marks into his skin. Cregan loves it, pressing his forehead to yours and huffing loudly. Growls mixed with heavy grunts escaped him. Since this was your first time in ages, you knew you couldn't last anymore.

His hips snap into yours as you tell him you're getting closer to your blissful finale. He ignores you, pounding it just as hard, slamming into that spongy spot inside you, pounding it when you squeal his name. When you see white, you feel him bite in an oddly specific spot on your neck, hard enough to draw blood. He licks up the red metallic fluid eagerly.

"That's it... Fuckin' take my pups in that filthy cunt. Fuck..." He groans in your ear, body trembling in delight.

"Cre- Cregan, stop- I-I can't take any more." You cry, overwhelmed with pleasure. He ignores your pleas, riding out his orgasm just as rough as he started, bursting inside you. 

Gradually, he slows, looking into your eyes and panting heavily, keeping his cock stuffed in your cunt. With a loving kiss, he gently wipes away your tears.

"Don't pass out yet, I'm not done with you. You're all mine tonight, Cub. All. Mine."

[somelonelywordmonger]

Now keep in mind that the political turmoil in South Korea with the addition of that horrible plane crash are likely causing the won to depreciate in value. (I think that's what it is called when it trends down?) But that is still a lot of money in USD which can help a lot of us Americans understand the struggle that these people in Squid Game are going through.

See, we have billionaires all throughout the world. And billionaire corporations. And they run the world. They control the game. They create scarcity and drive up prices and ensure that (at least here in the US) Healthcare is a luxury and housing not an automatic right. They control all areas of society that have a direct affect on all. Politics, healthcare, welfare, military, industry, food, housing, other basic necessities, transportation, even things like entertainment that can be seen as luxury.

1 billion won makes a strictly USD hardwired brain think that these people are outrageous. That the debt is 100% their fault. Who in their right mind would accrue 10 billion dollars in debt, right? (Thinking of player 100 here.) Well wrong. Because it is in won and we have to directly translate it to our USD to see that bigger picture. And I encourage you to do it for pounds and yen and other currencies (like euros and so on.) And keep in mind how whatever is happening in the country or countries using that currency has a direct affect on this price of debt and those people. Then I want you to think of yourself in the position of these people. When you still have an income and a house and/or support, it is easy to think of the people who were unhoused in the episode "Bread and Lottery" as foolish or maybe even smart. Depending on where you are in stability is whether or not you think it is okay to choose bread or the lottery ticket. I try to rationalize an otherwise sickening game the recruiter was playing. In this scenario he has the wealth. Most people chose the lottery ticket, especially the ones who looked like they had been out there longer. Only one chose bread. I'd like to think I'd choose bread and then just buy a lottery ticket if ever in a place where I am comfortable enough to do so. Because the odds are shit. But this man then created a warped version of scarcity as he stomped and destroyed the bread in the end. And he goes further to say it was their fault. That they were the ones who threw the bread away. My friends. This is the ploy. Just like in the Games where they sign consent forms. The people running the game do everything to make it seem like these people have a choice. To make it seem fair. To act like they don't have control. And our trusting hero sees this and does everything he can to call it out. But manipulative tactics coupled with desperation which was mostly created by these real billionaires helps to cover them from blame. Instead, it is the players who threw their lives away. The players made their debt. And yeah, no party is 100% blame free as we do make choices. But most of the choices are made under such manipulative circumstances. And if you can't see that, then I hope you are never in a position where you have to live and understand that. But I also hope that you allow this to wake you up. You are closer to a position like many of these players: Being 1 billion won (678,306.60 USD) in debt than you are to being one of those global elite.

Now I have no idea how I would accrue the USD equivalent of 10 billion won in debt (6,781,893) like player 100, short of serious medical bills or business failure here in the US. But I can totally see why most of the players in those Games surpassed the millions or are at least high up in the millions and I understand why they keep telling themselves one more game. Just like I understand why many of the unhoused people chose the lottery over the bread. When in reality, these problems could be fixed if wealth wasn't accumulated to unreasonable amounts by a select few. With drastic change for the better in our societies, so many of these issues would be fixed or lessened which would mean no more exorbitant debt that causes people to risk their lives every day to pay it off and get out from the hole.

My family would owe around 17 million won to debt collectors and that doesn't include the combined Parent PLUS loans and individual loans my brother and I took out for our colleges. Those surpass 200 million won when put together. And we're fortunate as there are worse situations and debts. So yeah. In-ho was right that the Games would only stop when the world changed. But Gi-hun is also right. He just needs more people to actually help him change the world. Or it will be doomed to failure like in that last episode. So please, translate these debts into your currency to try to understand the desperation. Put yourself in their place. And remember who the real enemy is. Remember that all of life is a balance and that there are cycles and spirals everywhere. And finally, keep your heads up my friends. The current rate the world is heading at isn't sustainable. Which means the world will fall into pieces as we tear each other apart (hope not) or we will finally band together and create change for the better. Thank you if you read this far, now you can return to your Squid Game fanfiction. 💜

[1super2]

ona battle - your coming home

You had been playing for barca for as long as you can remember. You started in the academy and that is where you met ona . It was always your guy's dream to play in the first team together .

At the age of 16 you got asked to start training and playing with the first team but ona did not get the same opportunity.

She played on the b team for 2 years whilst you were becoming a regular player for the first team .

Ona decided to move to man united to get experience playing in the highest league in england .

You really didn't want her to go but you knew it was the best thing for her .

You are now 21 and your guys dream has still not come true . You achieved the dream of playing in the national team together but you wanted to make this dream come true .

You were getting ready to go to training.

The season was over but you guys still had to play in the champions league final so you guys were preparing constantly.

You were just about to leave the house when ona called you.

" Hey ona you alright i was just about to go to training " i asked her

" Hey i just wanted to tell you something before you hear from the media " she says getting me excited

" Don't tell me it is what i think it is " i reply

" I think it is I AM COMING TO BARCA NEXT SEASON " She screams down the phone

" NO WAY ARE YOU COMING HOME " i

shout loudly

" Yep but i will leave you to get to training we don't want you to be late and i will talk to you later " she says before the phone cuts off and i get in my car to drive to training .

I arrive and the training ground and walk straight into the locker room hoping to find mapi , patri and alexia as them being my three closest friends ona said i could tell them as i am rubbish at keeping secrets from them .  I walked in and saw all three of them sitting at their lockers so i walked over to them and pulled the aside .

" Guess what ona is coming back next season " i said trying to keep my voice quiet but that wasn't that easy as i was too excited

" So the rumours were true then " mapi asks as i nod

" As much i am happy we do need to get to training " alexia says as all 4 of us walk out of training

For that whole training session i was so happy and playing at my best . Every time i tried to score pass sandra i would got flying pass her . Every time i would go in for a tackle it would be clean and with me getting the ball .

That was probably the best training session i have had in a long time .

I guess i have to thank ona for that .

" If she isn't even here and you are playing like this i would love to see you playing when she arrives next season " patri jokes as we walk back into the changing room .

A/N

PLEASE REQUEST I AM DESPERATE FOR SOME THINGS TO WRITE

[rocketbirdie]

A New School Hunter's Guide to Old School Monster Hunter: What to Expect

World and Rise have come and gone. These are the games that introduced you to Monster Hunter. But now that you've completed every goal you set out to achieve, there's a big 2025 sized hole in your hunting heart where Wilds may one day be. "In the meantime, why not catch up on the old MH games?" you think to yourself, blissfully unaware of the hell that you are about to subject yourself to.

Below the cut is a SUPER LONG and very dramatic post, intended for new-ish Monster Hunter players who are bored of being good at the game, and want to remember what AGONY feels like— but would rather not jump in 100% blind like I did, doomed to hilarious suffering.

Note: This post mainly refers to MHGU, but much of it applies to older MH games as well. I came from Rise, and have not played World. If I made any incorrect assumptions about games I haven't played, apologies in advance. Let me know if I made any glaring mistakes.

Also, feel free to reblog and add any more info that I missed! I am but one mortal hunter, after all.

Table of Contents, because I wasn't kidding when I said this is a super long post:

Preparing for a Quest

GATHERING TAKES FOREVER

Paintballs, and other things that aren't in the newer games for a very good reason

When the monster attacks you

When you attack the monster

Armor Skills (AAAAAAA!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAGHHHHH!! AAAAAAAHHAGHHAAHGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!)

The Desire Sensor (You Will Grind.)

No but really, you'd better have ~30 minutes set aside if you're planning on reading this whole thing in one sitting. Enjoy!

1. Preparing for a Quest

Many of the conveniences of the modern quest hub layout are nowhere to be found in old school MH games. Sure, you've got an overpriced shop, a smithy, and a quest handler all in one spot. And if you're lucky, maybe even a place to eat before the hunt. But if you want to change your equipment, save the game, or entrust your cat with an overseas trade deal, you'll likely have to do it somewhere else. And that means loading screens.

I'm telling you now, get used to the loading screens. Make sure you know what you want to do and where you need to do it, before you sit there and wait. Our spoiled Gen 5 asses are so accustomed to seamless transitions; the load times are not unreasonable, but the sheer number of interruptions will make you feel like a rabid animal gnawing at the bars of a wire cage. You'll get used to it. <- That's a phrase you're going to see a LOT in this post.

Go to your house to pick out your weapon and armor, and feast your eyes upon the horror: all of the equipment is haphazardly thrown into one box. There are no separate storage spaces for individual weapon types, meaning your sweet precious baby angel, the hammer, has to share menu real estate with the fucking light bowgun (UGH).

You cannot sort armor by head, chest, arms, etc. Want to see how your armor skills are looking? Close the box. Open the start menu. Navigate to "status," then flip through a page or two of normal, healthy stats. Find the armor skills page. Black out for a split second. Feel your heart rate spike, then immediately close out the armor skills, and decide that it's not important right now, and that you'll figure it out later.

Get your items in order. Set an item loadout if you can. Money is tight, and that won't be changing any time soon, so keep an eye on your zenny while you're shopping and smithing. Excess bones and ore are a decent source of cash if you're desperate.

I know I probably don't have to say it, but EAT! Eat something before the hunt! It increases your health and stamina bar and may grant you temporary skills. Some skills are exclusive to food, and can't be acquired via armor or decorations, so try out as many foods as you can. You'll be able to make more dishes using ingredients that you obtain as side quest rewards.

Before you set out on your quest, make absolutely certain that you have everything you might need. This is EXTREMELY important. The main camp is pretty much just there for show. (And for delivering eggs, but that's beside the point.) You cannot change your equipment or refill your items AT ALL once you're out there. If you forgot to eat, too bad, sucks to be you. And whatever weapon you bring is the only one you'll be using for that entire quest.

Alright, time to hunt! Talk to the quest handler, no, not that npc, no, that's not her either- ahem. Talk to the quest handler, aaaand yippee. 1 Star is all gathering quests. Well, at least they'll go by quickly!

2. GATHERING TAKES FOREVER

The first thing you'll notice on your first gathering quest in old school MH is that you slowly. Gather. One. Item. At a time. Maybe two if you're really striking it rich. Please for the love of all that is good, hold down the gathering button. Save yourself some time. Don't be an idiot like I was for more hours than I'm willing to admit.

YOU NEED TO GATHER. You need to gather so much, all the time, constantly. If you're not actively in combat, you should be gathering. If you're not gathering, then you should be moving to another gathering spot in order to gather more stuff. Bring a gathering palico. Hell, bring two. They are The Best type of palico, it doesn't even come close. There is no moment when you should not gather.

I can't stress this enough. Old school MH games will not just shower you with free items. Quest rewards are often pitiful, and it's safe to assume that the trader won't have what you need. Yes, gathering is slow and boring. But that's exactly why you need to weave it into every beat of downtime that the game gives you. GATHER, always. You'll thank yourself later.

You will need pickaxes to mine, and bug nets to catch bugs. These take up precious inventory space, but are well worth bringing to regular locales. If you want to fish and actually obtain something worthwhile (PLESIOTH), then you'll need to craft bait or bring some with you. And if the crafting recipes aren't listed anywhere in game, then gog help you.

There is a chance that crafting will just... not work. It'll consume the materials but spit out garbage instead of what you wanted to make. The odds of this happening can be mitigated by bringing a crafting book with you on your quest, which you can buy from a shop. But that book will take up space in your already miserably small inventory, assuming you brought sensible things along too, like potions. And a map.

Unless you have the locale memorized, you won't know where you are without the map item. In Low Rank, a map is courteously provided in the main camp's rations box, along with some field meds and food. (Don't get used to this kind of generosity. It'll be gone in High Rank and beyond.) Now that you have a map, you'll be able to see where all of the gathering spots are.......... right? RIGHT?????

WRONG. If you want to know where the spots are, you'll have to find them and then dedicate some real-life human brain memory space for that info. In some games, the gathering spots are obvious, with a big question mark that pops up when you can interact with them. In older games... uh... ha. Haha...... yeah. Good luck.

On the bright side, at least the map is good for keeping yourself safe. Y'know, because of the titular monsters. You can see the monsters on the map......... right?

Okay I'm gonna cut straight to the chase.

3. Paintballs, and other things that aren't in the newer games for a very good reason

Craft a pretty pink paintball with a paintberry and a sap plant. Equip it in your item scroll bar, and press that sexy item use button to throw it at a monster. Voila! A pink dot appears on your map. This (and psychoserum) allows you to see the monster's location.

Get into the habit of bringing multiple paintballs with you on every quest. You will miss a few throws. Also, the effect wears off after a few minutes, meaning you'll have to find the monster and hit it with another paintball again in order to keep it on the map. Be mindful of flying wyverns, who are aggravatingly hard to follow without a paintball. That includes some unexpected honorable mentions, for example Mizutsune, Zinogre, and Rajang, who can just... fly to the opposite side of the map. Yeah, I know. Don't ask.

So Zinogre has just taken to the skies. Now's a great opportunity to sharpen your weapon! If you remembered whetstones, that is. They're not an infinite resource, and they're not just automatically in your inventory. You'll have to go out of your way to obtain them and bring them with you on your hunts.

Likewise, I mentioned earlier that you need pickaxes and bug nets for gathering their respective items. What I didn't tell you is that they too are a finite resource. Pickaxes and bug nets can and will break, and you'll have to buy or craft new ones. If you're planning on doing a lot of gathering, eat for skills that reduce the likelihood of your tools breaking. It makes a huge difference.

Pay attention to what locale the quest takes place in. Some locales are hot, like Dunes and... *shudders* Volcanic Hollow. Bring cool drinks with you to hot locales, or else you'll take passive heat damage. Trust me, you do not want to be on fire the whole time you're running away from (and whiffing your attacks on) Uragaan. Ask me how I know that.

Similarly, cold locales will ruin your stamina bar over time. Hot drinks protect you from this stamina drain. Some locales, like Desert, have both hot and cold areas. Which is annoying because the drinks cancel each other out. Keep this in mind.

Don't be lured into a false sense of comfort just because you didn't forget your cool drinks. Because once you get into High Rank, there's a pretty good chance that you won't spawn at the main camp when you start a quest. One day, you will spawn right into a pool of lava, directly in a monster's line of sight, with zero time to prepare. It's okay to be a total chicken and run away screaming. After all, it is a monster, and it will attack you.

4. When the monster attacks you

I almost guarantee that your first old school hunt will leave a bitter taste in your mouth. Not bitter enough to make you instantly hate the game, but just enough to make you want to put the controller down and go outside and maybe even interact with other human beings, which is just as tragic.

Want to get some practice in with your weapon before the hunt? Well, too bad bucko, there's no training area. There may be a so-called "training quest," in which an npc barfs tutorial text onto your boots and then pits you against a real monster in an inescapable arena fight to the death, which is hilarious if you think about the in-game universe implications. Anyway. If you want to learn the in and outs of your weapon, then you'll have to do it the old fashioned way: get out there and get your ass kicked.

Great news! Getting your ass kicked is cheap, easy, and quick. Monsters' attacks will hit you like a cement truck packed with explosives speeding towards a steel wall. Even dumb little attacks like tail slaps and nibbles will take a CHUNK out of your health bar. Good thing you brought potions!

Terrible news! You are extremely vulnerable for several seconds while consuming healing items. Whether you like it or not, you will stand there in place, unable to move at all, glug, then flex your strong beautiful arms for the whole world to admire. And if the monster turns its attention towards you while you're doing this, there is nothing you can do but watch in despair as all of the health you just regained AND then some, gets torn away from you in an instant.

Don't wait until the fights get tough in order to prioritize learning monster's attack patterns. Even early on, only heal when you know for certain that it's safe to do so. Remember, it's okay to run away like a little wuss to put distance between yourself and the monster so you can use your items in peace. Hell, leave the area altogether if you have to. That being said, don't let the fight get too close to the edges of the area. Loading zones always get the last laugh.

Sooo.... hitboxes. They suck. They're bigger than they look, and they're present for longer than they should be. And some attacks have little to no tell or wind-up animation. Some monsters are just a vile conglomeration of both of these problems. (here's looking at you, Yian "You Mother Fucking Son of a Bitch" Garuga). Sigh... you'll get used to it.

If you came from Rise, getting knocked down by an attack will feel EXCRUCIATING. There is no fast way to fling yourself back onto your feet after taking a big hit. You will lie there, recoiling in pain, seething for way longer than you want— and you may even like it after a few hundred hours. Hang in there.

If a strong attack sends you flying into a wall, you'll very likely get stunned. Getting stunned is the single most dangerous thing that can happen, far worse than poison or waterblight or what have you. You can escape stun significantly faster by mashing buttons and wiggling the control stick. And I guess you could also bring the Stun Res skill, but... we'll, um, come back to that later.

WATCH OUT for pin attacks! You may very suddenly get snapped up and chewed apart like a dog toy, and it will be very bad for your health. That's why you should keep your pockets lined with literal shit. Chuck a dung bomb to escape a pin attack before the monster finishes ripping you to shreds. Dung bombs may also convince an unwanted monster to leave the area, which is great for when you'd rather not fight Gravios and Shogun Ceanataur at the same time. Which is all the time.

5. When you attack the monster

Your favorite weapon is not what you remember it being. Moves are missing, or mapped to completely different buttons. "How tf do I vault? Why won't my kinsect go where I want?? Stop shooting pheromone pellets!!!" whines the insect glaive main. "What do you mean there's no shoulder tackle?? How do I get to TCS faster????" cries the greatsword player. "Oh, ok, nothing's really changed," says the SnS main. It's a travesty, I tell you.

All of your movement is clunky. Attack timing is off. New school muscle memory is going to get you carted a lot. But hands down, the absolute most traumatizing thing is that there is no backwards dodge roll. You can dodge left, right, and forward, but never back. As a hunting horn main myself, I can assure you, this is a fate worse than hell. They say you never know love until you've loved and lost. You loved the backwards dodge roll, and soon, you'll know it.

And it gets even funnier if you play lance or gunlance— you can kiss your forward hop goodbye. Need to close the gap? Turn around, aim your squishy butt cheeks at the monster, and hop backwards towards it, expending absurd amounts of stamina in the process. Otherwise, walk slowly and threateningly towards it like the apex predator you are. Oh, and don't bother blocking attacks. It takes too much stamina, inflicts an abysmal knockback, and half of the time, you'll just get hit anyway. Guard and Guard Up are 100% necessary if you plan on using that shield. Good luck obtaining those skills, sucker.

The charge blade is somehow simultaneously more complicated and way easier to play than its modern iterations. The opposite is true of the switch axe, imo. Blunt weapons are stronger, but there's something a bit off about the way they feel. The longsword is the longsword. And as for the bowguns, I wouldn't be able to tell you, because I know better than that.

It doesn't matter what weapon you pick, because either way, you are going to develop a highly concerning dash juice dependency.

Take advantage of every tool the game provides. The usual stuff like barrel bombs, traps, and ballistae are indispensably helpful. But there are other familiar mechanics that are way more useful in old school MH than they are in newer games. That includes invading monsters (DEVILJHO!!), who will indiscriminately attack you AND the monster you're hunting, inadvertently aiding your hunt without you needing to wyvern ride or seek out a turf war. Jump off of ledges to rack up mounting damage in gen 4 games, which may reward you with a free knockdown (if you can mash fast enough)!

Monster's movements are janky, and this is in your favor. Get good at "head sniping" the monster as they turn around in 90 degree increments. Don't get greedy during small opportunities. Remember, monsters can go from t-posing, straight to crushing you to death, with zero wind-up animation.

There are no damage numbers when you land a hit. This may spoil the instant gratification factor of the game for a while. If you're a greatsword main, you will suffer from withdrawals due to Big Number Addiction. But over time you'll realize that it's actually fantastic, because now you're less obsessed with landing the super big awesome attack on the ultra weak spot for maximum damage. Instead, you'll find yourself savoring every little hit you manage to land. It'll be better for your cardiovascular health in the long run.

That's a good analogy for the entire new school to old school pipeline: it sucks A LOT for a long time, then gets really, really good later on once you get over the "Gen 5 stages of grief." Listen, you will have an abusive relationship with this game. It took me 80 HOURS before I could actually say with confidence that I liked MHGU more than I disliked it. Not that I loved it, but merely that I didn't hate it. 80 real life hours. That's... probably not good, but whatever.

There is one thing that I don't think I'll ever learn to love, though. And that's...

6. Armor Skills (AAAAAAA!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAGHHHHH!! AAAAAAAHHAGHHAAHGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!)

Face it. You will never, ever, ever be as powerful as you are in World or Rise. You will not have your maxxed out attack and affinity boosting skills plus the comfy stuff like Flinch Free and Stun Res all at the same time. Not in Low Rank, not in High Rank, and not quite in G Rank either. Here's why.

Skills have tiers as usual. But now, they also have thresholds. For example, you want the skill Speed Eating +1, then you'll need 10 points in the Eating skill. If you're even one point short, then the skill will not activate. But Speed Eating +1 doesn't increase your potion glugging speed... if you want that to happen, then you'll need to add 5 more points, for a total of 15, to activate Speed Eating +2. This is true for every skill, and is way easier said than done.

Some skills will feel nerfed big time, like Handicraft. You'll almost never see purple sharpness without Handicraft +2. On the other hand, Crit Draw is a one tier skill that gives you a flat 100% affinity boost on every draw attack. Which is absolutely busted.

Wearing a single piece of armor will provide a few points towards a given skill. If the armor has slots, then you can slot in decorations to increase the points as well. Slot "sizes" are weird and inconsistent, and the decos themselves typically only add 1 or 2 points per skill. Considering the fact that the average skill takes 10 points to activate, and the average full armor set has maaaybe around 7 slots to work with, decos are not going to be your primary source of skill activation.

Now for another problem. Let's say you want an armor set that has just three skills: Status Attack +1, Constitution +1, and Stun Res +1. Pretty modest, right? Should be easy enough. Well would you look at that, High Rank Nerscylla's armor set gets you the first two, and because Stun Res decos are worth 2 points each, you can just slot the last skill in! Nerscylla's set has 5 slots, which is the exact number you need to get those 10 points in Stun Res.

Great! So you do just that. Except when you check your skill points, you discover that Stun Res has a whopping zero points.

Yeah, so... negative skills are a thing. Nerscylla's armor comes with -10 points in Stun Res, activating the "skill" Double Stun. Which as the name suggests, doubles the amount of time that you stay stunned, and I don't think I have to explain why that's bad. -10 plus 10 is zero. So much for that Halve Stun you wanted so bad.

Not all skills have equivalent negative skills, but many armor pieces and most decos will have negative points. The challenge of set building comes from having to carefully balance and calculate your skill points, to make sure you're not accidentally charging into battle against Agnaktor while at -20 Fire Res. It can be frustrating if you're like me, and you've got swiss cheese for brains and can't handle the math. Fear not, I've got something amazing for you.

Allow me to introduce you to your new favorite website, Kiranico. This website hosts Monster Hunter databases containing literally everything that the games don't tell you, or do really half-ass job of telling you. That includes weapon upgrades, material drop rates, monster hitzones and health pools, and most importantly, armor sets and their respective skills. Being able to view all of this info all in one place makes it SO much easier to theorycraft new equipment sets.

Kiranico will save you from so much grief. Bookmark it and cherish it like your firstborn child.

Alas, no amount of Kiranico homework will make it easier to obtain the materials you want. The Desire Sensor is real, and it demands sacrifice.

7. The Desire Sensor (You Will Grind.)

It's commonly said that the game can sense exactly what you're grinding for, and will go to un-fucking-believable odds to avoid giving you that which you need most. This is the alleged "Desire Sensor."

Now, don't get me wrong, the newer games have moments like this, too. Don't even get me started about the 46 tries that it took me to get ONE Golden Almudron Orb, out of the TWO that I needed in Rise.

But until you get better gear, a single old school monster could take you 15+ minutes. Especially if you're on your own. Monster's health pools are not well scaled for solo players, so chances are, hunts are going to take way longer than usual if you don't resign yourself to getting tripped by a cheater with a longsword. Couple this with some god awful drop rates plus the disheartening quest rewards, and you're in for a loooooooong grind.

I would say you'll get used to it, but honestly, you won't. You'll get sick of it. You'll be shaking Kiranico by the metaphorical shoulders, desperate for any little thing that might speed up the grind. You might even be tempted to pick up a bowgun. Such a lapse in sanity is frightening, but it will pass. Stay strong.

Take breaks from the grind every now and then, or at least have two different grinds that you can switch back and forth between when you get exhausted of one. Since there is no escaping the Desire Sensor, this is unfortunately the only advice I can offer.

Disclaimer: the Desire Sensor is, as far as I'm aware, not a real mechanic programmed into the games. But godDAMN if it doesn't feel real. As anecdotal evidence, here's a small sample of my own suffering. Materials I wanted, the amount of them I wanted, their drop rates, and the sheer number of attempts it took to complete my goal (yes, I kept count.):

Lightning Sac x8 (G Rank Khezu): 15% chance to carve. 18% chance as quest reward. 27% chance as part break reward. HUNTS: 22

Paddock Cream x1 (G Rank Tetsucabra/Zamtrios): 40% chance to obtain two as subquest reward. 25% shiny drop. 25% chance as capture reward. 14% chance as quest reward. HUNTS: 8. I mean, what the fuck.

Monster Broth x5 (High Rank Insectoid Small Monster): 20% chance to carve. 20% shiny drop. SLAIN: >70

Viscous Radiant Mucus x17 (G Rank Nakarkos) 40% chance to gather; multiple gathering opportunities. 18% chance to obtain at least one as quest reward. 18% chance to obtain at least one as subquest reward. 15% chance per tentacle broken to obtain two. HUNTS: 15 (IT'S A 30+ MINUTE FIGHT SOLO. FML)

Was it worth it? Hell yeah! Do I think we should go back to the way things were in the old games? Fuck no! 46 Almudrons haunt me in my wildest nightmares— but at least I didn't feel my hair getting longer playing Rise.

On the bright side, at least the Desire Sensor has a sense of humor, if that last Khezu was anything to go by. Shout out to carving three lightning sacs in a row.

Phew! That about wraps things up.

Don't let this post deter you from trying out a "hard" Monster Hunter game. I don't regret my old school experiences. They've made me a much more patient and observant player, which weirdly enough, has carried over into other series I play, too. I can't say the same about any other game I've played in my life, and that's just one of many reasons why Monster Hunter holds such a special place in my heart.

I hope that by sharing my wisdom, I've saved at least one overwhelmed player a whole lot of headache. The rest is up to you, fellow hunter. Take it slow, and have fun!

Oh, and one more thing: press the dodge button while climbing in order to climb faster. Learned that one by accident 200 hours in.

[iris-sistibly]

The Targ Talk: House of the Dragon S2

I'm late for the party because I took a break from writing QOT fanfics, but here I am.

Episode 1 commentary:

I do appreciate the whole tapestry thing that tells the history of the Targaryen dynasty (mostly focusing on the dance, duh), but I still prefer the opening in season 1.

Rhaenys refusing to follow Daemon's order is badass ngl. Like I said, Daemon is my favorite bitch but if I have to choose between him and Rhaenys, I'd take the latter's side. Daemon is the "strike the iron while it's hot" kind of person, but the moment the Greens learned about Lucerys' demise they have been on high alert in case of any attacks from the Blacks so...it was a bad idea to attack King's Landing just like that.

I think we can all agree that Emma D' Arcy did an amazing job at showing Rhaenyra's grief. The unkempt hair, the dirt on her face and body, basically being not being able to care for herself (and she doesn't care), very image of a mother who just lost another child was nailed to perfection. The scene where the queen found the remains of Luke and Arrax was just heartbreaking.

Speaking of nailing a scene, I am also impressed at Phia Saban. I know a lot of people were confused at how Helaena decided to give up her son after her failed attempt to bribe Blood and Cheese. Actually it was much worse in the book, but it still ended up with Jaehaerys' death. I do agree with what others said that Helaena had to choose or all of them will die. If she sacrificed herself, they would still have killed both kids, if she chose to give up Jaehaera, the result would STILL be the same. The fear, desperation, confusion and trauma of Helaena was delivered so well by Phia.

I also read some comments saying that Helaena foresaw her son's death, and whatever she does she couldn't stop it hence she did what she did.

However, I do agree that the Blood and Cheese scene which was supposedly the highlight of the episode felt a bit...underwhelming. I mean, if you really think about it, it's horrible but I was expecting it to be at the same level or at least close to the book kind of horrifying. Though idk why they excluded Maelor's character, and I don't even know if Daeron is going to exist in the show either.

I have a confession to make, I kinda like Aegon in this episode. I was expecting him to be a lazy bastard or a Joffrey Baratheon kind of "king" but at least he's trying. But as I'm writing this, I realized that he's just another pawn of Otto's (just like his mother). Having Aegon as king would give him control over the kingdom, he cannot be king and being the hand of Viserys, and now Aegon II is the closest he could get to the iron throne, that's why the greedy bitch did everything he can--use his daughter and have her marry to Viserys despite her young age and trying to convince Vizzy to marry Aegon to Rhaenyra. Dude has been planning it for years. When Alicent voiced out her concern about being undermined by her father at the small council I was like, babes you're a pawn in this game, that's all you are and I hate that the showrunners made her this way. Again, she was a player in the book and I prefer that version of her.

Criston Cole bitching about Rhaenyra choosing the crown over oranges, and refusing to be her whore but still ended up being a boy toy of another queen will never not be funny.

Oh, and after spending some time reading Helaegon fanfics, I kinda ship them now too 🤣🤣