#can we make this a staple meme for this au?

[starified-lizzy]

Yeah I don’t know.

I saw the OG meme/image (under Cut) and went “yeah, that’s them.”

[deliciouskeys]

For the Writer's Ask Game, 12, 13, 14, 23, amd 21 for The Selfish Gene, if you please. :)

(Writers’ ask meme) Thank you for asking! ☺️ Some long answers towards the end, hopefully at least semi-coherent!

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you?

I never disliked this per se, but I have grown much more interested in people being in / getting into long term marriage-like relationships, parenting together, domesticity in general.

13. Are there any tropes you used to like but don’t anymore?

Hardcore noncon sex used to be a real staple for me. I still like noncon nonsexual situations, but have grown to prefer the party with less freedom / being whumped to be the instigator of sex, or at least having a mutual carnal interest develop. Which is still definitely dubcon.

I’ve grown indifferent to age difference as I’ve grown older. Likely because I was into “old guys” in my teens/20s but have since lost that prism.

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer?

I’m pretty bad about clicking into everything (whether the tags sound like something I love or terrifies me or mildly weirds me out, just to see what it is). I’m more likely to fully read things written by friends in the realms of: high concept AUs, characters endowed with non-human characteristics, niche fetishes (agere, complicated bdsm), and major character death.

23. What’s a trope, AU, or concept you’ve never written, but would like to?

For The Boys fandom, I’d love to be able to pull off a Caligula fic. What HL threatens to do when talking to Starlight with the door closed? Let’s say something happens to trigger him, and he actually goes through with it. Now we have some kind of postapocalyptic hellscape where HL has installed himself as a despot. He’s not thrilled about no longer being seen as a purely heroic figure, but he’ll take being worshipped and cowered in front of as a vengeful, jealous demigod. Maybe he still claims to be a savior, if presumably not every country in the world has fallen into ruin. I haven’t worked out fully in my head how dark I’d be willing to go. Does he have some of our faves (Maeve, Annie, Billy) under lockdown in a demented harem of sorts? After just saying I was over the noncon trope, I think I’m getting right back into it here 😅. The most interesting part of this kind of fic, to me, would be any/all of these characters being manipulative and managing to bring out a very different side of HL behind closed doors. So even though ostensibly now he’s shown his true colors to everyone, it doesn’t mean he won’t revert to being way more cajoling and uncertain and needy because…. yeah, he still wants that genuine love, despite how many acts he’d have committed in this fic to make that virtually impossible. But I could see clever characters stringing him along a la 1001 Arabian Nights until they can think of how to actually overthrow him.

Is there a lot of plot and logistics? Yes. Am I necessarily interested in writing all of that out in detail? Probably not. But depending on how season 4 unfolds, I may become more inspired 🙂

21. If you wrote a “missing scene” in The Selfish Gene, what would it be?

This is a fic where many days are skipped between most chapters, but I think I cover everything I want to for HL’s pov. I initially wasn’t even going to provide any Billy pov in this fic, but HL was just too unreliable and unstable a third person closely aligned narrator not to do so periodically 😅. So a scene I’ve skipped but perhaps shouldn’t have is Billy going to visit his aunt during the period when HL is still under house arrest. My hc is that she doesn’t have Billy’s phone number because he refuses to provide it and used to change it a lot anyway, but she is up to date on what the tabloids have been reporting and had half a mind to figure out the exact address and visit him herself.

I want him to go visit her embarrassed and despondent. He hasn’t fully shared everything he knows about supes and HL in particular with her, so in that sense she’s less informed than MM. But with Aunt Judy, Billy can be a bit more open about just how freaked out he is about having a child, now that it’s dawning on him that he’s made a decision that’s going to change his life profoundly and irrevocably. Aunt Judy is savvy and pragmatic and comforts him without getting too maudlin about it. Tells him he’s going to do the best he can and that it will get him through. He contemplates taking Terror back with him to NYC but decides against it, because he doesn’t want to spring that on HL as a surprise in a confined space (aka he hasn’t fully opened up to HL despite living together for months). Aunt Judy probably finally insists on getting Billy’s phone number and promises not to contact him unless something dire happens, and promises not to tell his mother.

Why didn’t I write this scene? Honestly, one of my hurdles is writing intensely British dialogue 😂 (my self serving hc is that Billy dials down the diction differences when he’s talking to a septic like HL). But there’s at least allusion to it coming in the next chapter 🤞

[immobiliter]

@shadowcovcn sent a meme: 14, 15, 18

14. Who is an author that inspires you?

oh rip you're asking the jaded english graduate this question lmao. so I'm not sure if I could pinpoint an author who particularly inspires me nowadays — there are obviously authors that I love reading, but I haven't really read fiction widely since graduating and most of the fiction I have drawn inspiration from over the past decade or so is by classic authors. plus storytelling as a medium isn't just restricted to books and I could give you countless examples of other forms of storytelling that inspire me on a daily basis. but speaking strictly about the printed word, big shout out to Jacqueline Wilson books for being a staple of my childhood (i doubt anyone outside of the UK will know of her lmao), and Andrea Levy is also suuuuch a favourite writer of mine. and then a mandatory shout out to Oscar Wilde who inspired the majority of my tagging system on this blog, and is also one of my all-time favourite writers.

15. What do you look for in a rp partner?

someone who's chill lmaooo. that's honestly the biggest thing for me and I think I'm lucky because I feel like I'm a pretty good judge of character? I have a sceptical disposition and I'm strong-minded, so I tend to be rather picky of who I reach out to and befriend on this site and for the most part I haven't really steered wrong. if you're gonna be my rp partner you just have to be OK with the fact that I might not reply to your thread for two years, and that if you pressure me I will either make it three years or I'll drop the thread altogether. also, that I might not talk to you everyday — I don't even talk to some of my rl best friends everyday, I much prefer low-pressure friendships where we can check in every few weeks or months and pick up like no time has passed at all. I just don't have the time or inclination for the crap that comes along with this hellsite anymore, so I stick to people I already know and people who pass my strict vibe test lmao.

passion is also always something I look for too, on a more positive note. I enjoy seeing people passionate about their muses on my dash, it's infectious and there have been so many occasions where I have voluntarily sought out the source material and watched a show/read a book/played a video game solely because a friend of mine or someone on my dash has been talking so passionately about them/it. like it doesn't even matter if I don't write in the same fandom as you, if you get me passionate about a character or universe through the dash powers of osmosis, I'll make an AU especially for you lmao.

18. Are there any AU’s you’d like to explore but haven’t had the chance to yet?

oof this is such a good question and such a tricky one to answer on a multi where I have muses that encompass multiple genres and also where I'm really not shy about writing crossovers lmao. is it a cop-out to just say that I love group verses? not even just verses that involve several people, but creating a group verse with one other person where we just throw different muses from our multis into it like a melting pot? writing two characters against each other is fun of course, but there's something even more fun about throwing ten muses into the same verse and figuring out everyone's connection to each other. or starting with two muses and then building it up slowly until you have a google doc with a dozen muses and a flow chart explaining how they all connect lmao. it just enriches your writing environment and gives you so much more stimuli to play with when you reply to a meme or write a thread. instead of coming up with npcs on the fly, you can bring another muse in to help figure out a plot point or help flesh out an aspect of a relationship or dynamic without it being superficial because you're not just creating a surface-level character to be referenced in one or two replies, but another living, breathing muse with their own life and perspective. I just like everything feeling connected, where every thread has a ripple effect on all of the other future ones you write. also, as someone who likes to push themselves when it comes to writing, it's a wonderful challenge to write three muses within the same thread, I love it.

[the-girl-who-didnt-smile]

I finally finished reading Anderson’s (2024) Voodoo: An African American Religion. It’s a very helpful resource, especially the Voudou “Book of Psalms” in the back. 

At that, I think I am going to refer to it as “Louisiana Voudou” instead of “New Orleans Voodoo”. “Voodoo” with the four O’s actually has a very negative connotation, so I think “Voudou” is a more respectful term. Much like “New Orleans Voodoo”, “Louisiana Voudou” is also a misnomer, because it was practiced across the Mississippi River Valley.

Having finished reading this, I think many choices I made here are questionable. Something I should address at length, but there are just way too many Haitian elements in this story. Where is Grand Zombi (“Li grand Zombi qui fé muri”)? Where is St. Marron? Those were very important Spirits in Louisiana Voudou. The lineup I created is quite questionable.

Also, I can debunk myself with regards to that theory I posted about Baron Samedi. Jean Zombi is the likelier candidate. The only interesting piece of evidence is the Woodruff County “Devil”, but because the Gede spirits dress similarly it is not necessarily Baron Samedi. Not to mention, the top hat and frock coat were very popular fashion staples; doesn’t necessarily connect him to Baron Samedi.

I also started reading Milo Rigaud’s (1953)  La tradition voudoo et le voudoo haïtien.  Very interesting read.

Here is how he describes Jean Zombi:

Jean Zombi est un des prototypes les plus curieux de la Tradition voudoo.

Il fut un de ceux qui, d'ordre de Dessalines. massacrèrent le plus de blancs pendant la libération d'Haïti du joug français.

Jean Zombi est actuellement un des mystères les plus influents du panthéon voudoesque : comme loa, il appartient au rite Péthro

TRANSLATION: 

Jean Zombi is one of the most curious prototypes of the Vodou Tradition.

He was one of those who, on the order of Dessalines, massacred the most white people during the liberation of Haiti from the French yoke. 

Jean Zombi is presently one of the most influential mystères in the Vodou pantheon: as loa, he belongs to the Petro rite.

SOURCE: Rigaud, Milo. La tradition voudoo et le voudoo haïtien: son temple, ses mystères, sa magie. FeniXX, 1953. P. 67. https://lib-ufdcweb3.uflib.ufl.edu/AA00002240/00001/70x 

And how he describes Papa Legba:

LEGBA. Papa Legba. Le mystère-Principe identifié au soleil et l'Est cosmique. S'identifie aussi au poteau rituel. Legba est le gardien des portes de I'astral; c'est lui qui garde < la barrière > ; aussi est-il Maître Grand-Chemin comme gardien des passages, attribution qui lui vaut d'etre, en meme temps, Maître-Carrefour ou le mystère de tous les croisements de route. Le syncrétisme religieux l'assimile au calvaire. Dans le panthéon voudoo, il est placé entre ses deux femmes: T-Sih-Lah We-Do et Ai-Da We-Do. Legba est le Christ voudoo ; il est placé au centre de toutes les races, ce qui signifie qu'il est < mulâtre >. Sa couleur est le blanc, tandis que Aida Wedo porte un drapeau d'azur, et Tsihlah un drapeau rouge. Synthèse des points cardinaux.

TRANSLATION: 

LEGBA: Papa Legba. The Principle mystère identified with the Sun and the cosmic East. He is also identified with the ritual poteau. Legba is the guardian of the astral doors; it is he who guards “the gates”; he is also Maître Grand-Chemin as guardian of passages, an attribution which makes him at the same time, Maître-Carrefour or the mystère of all intersections of paths. The religious syncretism assimilates him with Cavalry. In the Vodou pantheon, he is placed between his two wives: T-Sih-Lah We-Do and Ai-Da We-Do. Legba is the Vodou Christ; he is placed at the center of all races, which means that he is a “mulatto”. His color is white, while Aida Wedo carries a blue flag, and Tsihlah a red flag. Synthesis of the cardinal points.

SOURCE: Rigaud, Milo. La tradition voudoo et le voudoo haïtien: son temple, ses mystères, sa magie. FeniXX, 1953. P. 424. https://lib-ufdcweb3.uflib.ufl.edu/AA00002240/00001/428x 

Rigaud explicitly identifies Maitre Carrefour with Legba. Like with Marcelin, I wouldn’t expect Rigaud’s description to be consistent with how Vodou is practiced in the present day.

[yanderemommabean]

Ok here me out on this au idea

You’re a brand new hero, and you just so happen to have a passion for video games. You meet this socially awkward, kind of childish guy on one but hes pretty good so you play with him for a while. You and him end up being pretty good friends and eventually you admit you’re a hero, and he completely dotes on you over it, but eventually his questions and comments get a little strange. Like it eventually turns into the “Don’t you ever just wanna go apeshit?” meme.

Within the next few weeks you’re called into what’s basically a LoV vs Heros battle. Right as you’ve beaten some minor villians, you see shigaraki coming towards you. Of course you launch yourself at him, screaming at him about what a terrible, cruel man he is. As you’re fighting you realize he’s only dodging you, and then he starts revealing very personal things about you only a few people know.

“Come on now, aren’t you my player two? Don’t act so surprised, you KNOW i know all about you!”

Before you can realize who he really is too you and what’s happening, he pulls you through a portal

-🌩 anon

(Sorry for any misspellings or if this is cringey! English isnt my first language)

You’re the tear in his otherwise impenetrable armor. The one weakness he was ok with having, filling his every thought no matter how mundane and typical.

Everyday he plays online, it’s his getaway from the reality he’s forced into, and after meeting you it’s just become that much more of a necessity. He had a small interest in the beginning, seeing how you handled yourself and the missions thrown your way. Good tactics, some of them he even took notes on mentally so he could be better in the future.

Soon he learns your name, and with the help of persuasion he learned you were a hero and lived nearby. He admired that you were wanting to change the world, but you were on the wrong team. Not to worry, he’ll get that cute little mind of yours to think deeper on the whole hero society as a whole.

“So...did you become one for the paychecks?” He asks while munching on candy, letting the silence sink in as you think for a moment. The seeds of mistrust being planted always make beautiful music to him.

When you don’t answer, he begins asking more questions, casually shooting at enemies on screen “Ever wonder why they never save those who need them the most? I mean think of all the kids who have lost families because Heros were too lazy. Not to mention the property damage!”.

You snort into the mic and shake your head “The villains do their fair share of that too ya know? But no I just want to help people. Uhm- SHIT-“ you hiss trying to avoid being absolutely murdered by some asshole who tried to sneak up on you “God damn it! Fucker got me!”.

You hear laughing in your headphones and knew shigaraki was enjoying your gamer rage. Asshole. “Very funny. Distraction as a means to get me killed? Cold blooded dude”.

Shigaraki only hummed in acknowledgment, smirk on his face as he continues to move the joysticks and watch the map. “You should look deeper into the hero’s you want to be like. Some truths aren’t as on the surface as you’d like them to be”.

As the hours tick by, you allow his words to sit in the back of your mind, not paying much attention to them until you head to bed. Your body comfortable and letting your muscles relax, but your brain refuses to let his questions leave. Maybe he had a point, that some heros were less than savory, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be one.

Those thoughts haunt you for the days coming, and while on patrol you find yourself thinking back to them while fighting villains. Heroes surely have more morals than what Shigaraki thinks, right? They save people! It’s their job!

You were caught off guard, a punch landing right on your jaw, knocking you to the ground and on your back. Looking up, you see two men cackling down at you. One with red piercing eyes, dismembered hands covering his face as his bluish-white hair hangs low on his shoudlers. The man beside him, covered in staples and burns, blue eyes that steal the breath from you with how intensely they stared into you.

They both looked deranged and manic, as if they were about to burn down the world. Really, for all you knew, they were. Considering one of their quirks was combustion and the others was decay.

You rub your jaw and stand back up, wobbling a bit as both men just watch with unsettling smirks. “My my my, this is quite different from your typical fighting style” The man with hands all over him stated smugly. He scratched at his neck, gleefully watching your confused expression as you demand he explained what he meant.

“Oh surely you know what I mean. Usually you use much better strategy! Not just rush in and button mash like a noob” he causally gestures, stepping closer to you while the other man crossed his arms over his chest with a bit of an annoyed look. “You gonna play the theatrics or can we get what we came for and leave?” He snipped, seemingly jealous with his tone.

You yank away as a hand reached to grab you, your eyes wide as you try to piece together what he was talking about. He chuckled and roughly yanked you by your wrist, pressing you to his chest “My player two. So clueless without me, so lost on how the world really works. Dont worry, I’m here now. I’ll show you how things really work”.

You writhe and begin fighting his death grip, panic filling your mind as you realize who this was. “T-Tomura?! “ you gawked, feeling dumb and confused as to why any of this was happening and how to get out of this without getting killed. His other arm wraps around your waist, pressing your body snugly into his hold as he inhaled your scent, groaning as he savored the aroma.

“Don’t fight it. It’s a losing battle and you know it” his venomous voice whispered, a black hole surrounding you both and swallowing you whole. Within a blink you found yourself in an entirely new environment, dread filling your stomach as he begins to remove the hand covering his face, showing his true expression. Shigaraki licks his chapped lips and roams his eyes over your body, a soft laugh leaving him as you only stare like a deer caught in headlights.

“Oh I’m going to have so much fun showing you how good evil can feel”.

-Mommabean (tsk this needs work I know I know but I hope you enjoy! Comment, like or reblog if you want! )

[fangroyal]

Fic Rec Tag Meme

@sitp-recs, I’m terribly late, but this looked way too fun, so I had to join in. Fair warning, y’all, not everything here is Drarry, or even HP (I am a prolific rarepair shipper/multi-fandomer, and Dron is my OTP 😂), so I’ve added the fandoms and pairings below as well. All of these (and many more!) can also be found on my ficshelf! It was so hard to pick these as it was, I couldn’t help but point you in the right direction for all the ones I (sadly, unfortunately) had to cut from the list, lol.

Anyway, thank you so much for running this tag meme, @sitp-recs! It’s been amazing seeing everyone’s recs and discovering new fics! 🖤

• A fic you love without knowing the source material: He Was a Punk, Pete Did Tabletop Roleplay by @mscaptainwinchester Marvel | Peter/Wade | NC-17 | 7.5k

• A fic with a premise that shouldn’t work but it does: Anthony J. Crowley, Retired Demon and Airbnb Superhost by @theoldaquarian Good Omens | Hints of Aziraphale/Crowley | G | 3k All fics are valid and work!! That being said, I had no idea just how much I was going to fall in love with a fic about Crowley being an AirBnB host when I first opened it. 😂

• A fic you’ve reread several times: Department of Magical Creatures Case 62637 by @mscaptainwinchester (under RonsPigwidgeon at the time) HP | Draco/various, Ron/OMC, Ron/Draco | R | 121k How could I expected to only pick ONE?! 😂 I’ve reread everything you’re seeing here - I’ve reread nearly every fic I’ve ever recced at least once. But I couldn’t make a favorites list without this fic, so might as well put it here, haha!

• A fic you still remember many years later: Fire Burn and Cauldron Bubble by Sushi HP | Severus/Severus | NC-17 | 8.9k I remembered it so well (and fondly) that after 12+ years, I went scouring the Wayback Machine to find it. And yes, the pairing is correct. Don’t look at me. If you’re still interested in reading after knowing that, hit me up, ‘cause it takes a bit of instruction to find it now.

• A comfort fic: You and I by @shiftylinguini HP | Scorpius/Albus S. | NC-17 | 32k

• A cathartic fic: The Conformity Conspiracy by shrink South Park | Michael/Pete (or Ethan/Dylan, as this was written before they had names in canon) | R | 71k I really struggled with this entry. I came to the realization that...I don’t know if I’ve ever actually felt catharsis from a piece of media before??? Well, I have with music, for sure, but not really with anything else. Anyway, I chose this fic for this slot because every time I read it, I’m transported back to being a goth teen. I can feel every word, every action, like I’m going through those years again with them...Which isn’t necessarily what cathartic means, but fuck it, it works for me, haha. ***As always whenever I rec this fic, I do just have to warn that it’s not properly tagged on AO3, and there is definitely some potentially triggering content in it. If you’re interested in reading and would like to know more (so you can be better prepared), feel free to DM me!***

• A fic you’d print and put on your bookshelf: In Flight, Two Boys by lobst_r HP | Marcus/Oliver | NC-17 | 29K Again, how I could possibly pick only one for this one?! I would print out ALL of these fics if I could, and many more! But this is such a beautiful fic, it definitely deserves a spot on the list, and what better spot for it than this? There’s actually a sequel currently posting as well! I haven’t gotten around to reading it yet, but I’m sure it’s just as amazing, if not more so.

• A fic you associate with a song: You Do Your Body Work, I Feel My Pulse Working Overtime by @veelawings HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 1.6k I mean, it’s in the title. 😜 But also this is just a truly inspiring fic that I absolutely had to include! (I realized I somehow haven’t queued a rec post for it yet, and I will make sure to fix that soon!)

• A fic that inspires you: dirtynumbangelboy by @magpiefngrl HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 39k

• A fic that brought you onboard a new ship: Lumos by birdsofshore HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 41k Some people may be surprised to know that Drarry was, uh.......once my NOTP. Yes, really. 😂 You wouldn’t suspect that nowadays, would you??? LOL. It’s all because of this wonderful, beautiful fic. I saw it getting recced everywhere at the time and said fuck it, I’ll give the pairing another try - and I never looked back!

• A fic you wish could be a movie: Midnight in the City of a Hundred Spires by @shiftylinguini HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 25k

• A fic that led to you making friends with the author: A Weasel in the Hamptons by @peachpety HP | Ron/Draco | NC-17 | 15k I don’t quite know if this counts, because I believe we’d already been speaking before this??? 😂 But of course, being that I’m the mod for Ron/Draco Fest, I knew who was writing for this prompt of mine, and thus we dispensed with the formalities in private, haha! It was a great experience, and I was so overjoyed to see the results in the end. So happy to have met you, love! 😘 Hope you’re well!

• Free Space: The Pizzaria: A Sordid Tale of Destiny, Evil and Garlic by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Draco | PG-13 | 36k A Dron/crack!fic staple, honestly, and I just couldn’t make a favorites list without it!

• A fic you’ve gushed about irl: Runway by @candawrites HP | Ron/Draco | R | 15k

• A fic you associate with a place: Archipelago by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Draco | NC-17 | 18k I just have a very distinct visual memory of reading this fic for the first time: sitting on the couch in my mom’s living room, the sun setting outside. (I was visiting for her bday, I believe???)  I think of that moment every time I see the title.

• A fic that made you gasp out loud: clutched your life and wished it kept by @glitteringvoids HP | Ron/Draco | R | 110K

• A fic you found at the right time: Howlr by @partialtopotter HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 47k I got really sick in summer 2018. I know I’ve talked about it on here a million times at this point, so I won’t dwell. But I ended up finding and reading this fic the following March, and it reawakened my love of fic and fandom that had been lost over the previous months while I was dealing with everything. I hadn’t been reading or writing at all in all that time, and I ended up reading this whole thing in one sitting. I couldn’t put it down! It just made me feel so good, after a long time of not feeling anywhere near good.

• A fic that you would read fic of: In the Garden After Dark by @the-starryknight HP | Draco/Harry | R | 3.5k I just need more of this universe and Draco’s Illusion magic. 😍

• A fic that made you laugh out loud: Why Parvati Patil Must Die by hull1984 HP | Ron/Draco | PG-13 | 39k

• A fic with a line (or two) that you’ve memorized by heart: Hail to the King by Mad_Maudlin HP | Ron/Zacharias, Ron/Zacharias/Draco | NC-17 | 5k

• A fic that gave you butterflies: The Electric Fizzing Prick Pistols, or Whatever by whitmans_kiss HP | Sirius/Remus | PG-13 | 3.8k

• A fic that embodies something that you value in life: Luna Lovegood: Wank Coach for the Long-Since Deceased by yrfrndfrnkly HP | gen | PG-13 | 9.8k This was another difficult category to choose for. Not that I don’t think any fics I’ve read display good values! Of course they do! But I have this weird issue where I don’t, like...project? at all??? So sometimes it’s hard for me to recognize these things in what I read. But eventually I realized it had to be this fic, because I just love the carefree way Luna lives her life here, her job helping people (well, ghosts who could use some sexual release, specifically, but you know), and the wonderful friends she surrounds herself with.

• A favorite AU: Quibbler Unsolved by Leontina HP | Draco/Harry | PG-13 | 17k More of a fusion than an AU, but it’s just fantastic!

• A fic you stayed up too late to finish reading: Grounds for Divorce by @tepre HP | Draco/Harry | NC-17 | 122k

• A fic that made you feel seen: Taste the Rainbow by @maraudersaffair HP | Ginny/Pansy | PG-13 | 639

[toogayforthistoday]

kiss + dabi! 💙

Hey Hannah! Thanks for sending this in! This would have been out sooner, but my browser crashed and I had to re-write this from the beginning.

Number Generator says: 41! On a scar/wound!

I still have Borderlands!AU brain rot, are we really surprised at this point?

KISSED MEME

The steady hum of Sanctuary III’s engines has become something of an odd comfort to Gabe, bringing rise to many different forms of peace. A locked door meant they had a moment to breathe, to relax knowing they were in one of the safest places in the borderlands. Hitoshi and Ava talking animatedly outside about picking pockets meant he finally had someone he could call a friend. And the man cuddled up to them, while they hid away in Gabe’s room from the wandering CL4P-TP unit, meant they finally knew what ‘home’ felt like.

“I’ve never known a Steward Bot to talk that much. Is it too much to ask, that we modify his vocal processor to respond to a remote so we can turn him off? Even Hammerlock sided with me…” Dabi pouted, idly drawing circles on their hip with his fingers. Claptrap had recently taken to cornering the poor, hapless Pyro so he could ask him about his scars. Incessantly. “This ship needs more stairs…”

Gabe chuckled, bringing their hand up to card through his hair in sympathy. “If you figure out how to take him offline long enough for Ellie to do it, let us know.” The telltale whirring of Claptrap’s wheel motors outside the door had the pair tensing up in panic.

“Hey Hitoshi, Ava! Have either of you seen Dabi? I’ve got a question that I’ve been meaning to ask him, but every time I try to find him, he mysteriously goes missing! I’m beginning to wonder if he’s even actually real! Like a ghost! Or a fault in my coding!”

Gabe quickly ducked their head down into Dabi’s shoulder, smothering the snort of laughter that escaped them into his shirt. He looked down at his partner in disbelief, shaking his head slowly. He whispered out in faux-anger, “Are you serious? He’s questioning my existence and you’re laughing?” The question only served to make Gabe shake harder, slowly losing to battle to keep their laughter silent.

“Sorry Claptrap, we haven’t seen him. Have you tried checking with Tannis yet?” Ava piped up, finally.

“No! I just came from Tannis’ clinic, and he wasn’t there either! Argh! I’ll try asking VR-0N1CA, maybe she’ll know.”

Gabe finally calmed down as a knock sounded at the door. “He’s gone, for the moment. You can relax now.”

“Thanks Ava.” Dabi smiled at the door. He settled back down into Gabe’s arms, rubbing his nose against theirs. “You’re so mean to your boyfriend…”

Gabe beamed at him, leaning forward to gently press kisses onto the staples on his face. “It’s only cause I love you so much.”

[demonicintegrity]

Undertale was such a wholesome time tbh??? Despite its Flaws™️ I can just remember the intense validation I and many others felt with a canon enby/gnc protagonist, vague nostalgia with the fight gameplay and graphics, the immense amount of wholesome art (PTA Sans and co forever are in my heart) as well as the ridiculous number but still super creative amount of AUs????

Like,,, all things considered Undertale at its peak was a v wholesome and fun fandom. Plus, without it many people wouldn’t have been exposed to Toby’s godtier music making skills and we wouldn’t have some memes which are pretty much staples now. Like,,, Undertale was a good era of the internet.

[nitewrighter]

I don't know what Omegaverse is but at this point I'm terrified to find out

I saw the words “I’m terrified to find out” and my brain interpreted that as “Nitewrighter, please inflict this eldritch fandom knowledge upon me.”

The truth is you don’t need to look very far to find Omegaverse stuff--scroll down the AO3 listings for any popular M/M pairing and you’re bound to find at least one. It’s also called A/B/O, but since that combination of letters is also an Australian slur for an Aboriginal person, people make a point of including the slashes. A/B/O stands for “Alpha, Beta, Omega,” and it refers to a body of tropes that first appeared in slash fiction. Essentially, it’s a kink trope that has unfolded into a common Alternate Universe or, as we in the fanfic writing business call it, “AU.” The defining elements of this trope/AU is that it entails the present of sexually aggressive and dominant “Alpha” and a sexually submissive “Omega,” with “Betas” in between--but really, the Alpha/Omega relationship tends to be the star of the show.

 It’s different from your average dom/sub AU in that these sexual roles are treated as a sort of biological imperative that also affects the social structure of the universe, and these roles are highlighted as being animalistic in nature; characters go into heat, they possess anal glands like dogs or wolves that have identification/aphrodisiac/lubricating qualities, they undergo coital “Knotting” (that is, being unable to “detach” their genitals until they complete mating--which of course lends itself to a whole lot of dubcon implications because if you can’t stop the sex until the sex is done, That’s Not Good), and MPreg is pretty much a staple, with Omegas being the exclusive male capable of child-bearing. This fic trope first started emerging in the Supernatural fandom, and rose to prominence/popularity with a very specific kink meme in 2010, but it has since expanded to be present in numerous fandoms and is still a common fic trope today. You can check out more about it on Fanlore.

TL;DR, and or “Too long and I got too horrified to keep reading midway through”: People got horny and applied malformed theories about wolf hierarchies/weird complicated feelings about pregnancy as a biological imperative (???) to M/M slash and now there are fics where the word “gland” pops up WAY too often. 

[izumisays]

dear yuletide author

Thank you so much for reading this and taking part in this wonderful annual conspiracy!


First of all, I hope you have a lovely time! If any of the fandoms below pique your interest, I’m delighted already, and ready to hear all the stories you want to tell.

Fandoms:  Chihayafuru, Nirvana in Fire, Thunderbolt Fantasy

As for reading preferences, I’m happy with a wide variety of tones and genres, of any rating, ranging anywhere from lighthearted antics to dramatic casefics. But the core of all the stories I love has always been character interaction and interplay of their competences.

How the characters play off each other and bring out their best/worst, how they’d react to a divergence of events, how true they’d stay to themselves in a different setting – I love fanfiction for allowing us to reconnect with our favourite stories time and again by asking these questions. And there are so many ways to do it! To name a few favourites, I’m always game for POV hijinks, a missing scene, a casefic, canon expansion, backstories and what-ifs.

You may notice that quite a few of my requests lean towards shipfic – those, too, are welcome in a variety of tones – but I also tried to include openings for gen ideas if that’s your jam. Additionally, while it is not usually my top interest, I don’t have anything against AUs if there is something that you are itching to explore: I tend to enjoy them for a new aesthetic that fleshes out the favoured character dynamics in a new light, or a fusion that redefines the playing ground to allow the characters to exhibit their core competences in new and exciting ways.

I would be very grateful if you could avoid a/b/o and similar kinktropes, played-straight soulmate fic, and character interpretation that runs contrary to their core values. If in doubt, please reach out to me on anon - the askbox is open!

CHIHAYAFURU: Mashima Taichi, Wataya Arata, Suou Hisashi

You don’t have to include all three characters, but I’d love to see a fic that explores the connections between them better. I’m up to date with all manga scanlations.

Wataya Arata/ Mashima Taichi

In the immortal words of Henjin Meijin, Arata is that person for Taichi whose opinion makes or breaks him. (His wording may have been different, but if I go rummaging into the chapter archive to find the exact quote, I’ll end up binge-rereading year three into the night again, and then where would my Yule sign-up be?) (On that note, what kind of a MASSIVE LOSER waxes poetics about Taichi’s boyfriend problems to Taichi’s MOTHER, whom he JUST met? Suou Hisashi, that’s who.) Needless to say, that paramount opinion was not always great, and neither was Taichi’s general wellbeing.

Good news is, Arata is confident in his manliness, and he has no problem acknowledging Taichi’s ridiculously pretty and not too bad at karuta these days, and he’s also moving to Tokyo. Taichi’s definitely pretty and has an apartment in Tokyo, where a country bumpkin of paramount importance may possibly stay over until things are sorted out… eventually. Hint hint.

Jokes aside, I pine for the dynamics between the two of them. I nearly lost it, reading the Meijin semifinals — and if you can show me a person who saw them bawl as they crawled into each other’s laps on Japanese national television and didn’t bawl in response, well, that person is sure not me.

I’d like to see a story that lets them build and explore that connect. I do not object to eventual OT3, but I think Chihaya is on a quest to find her own footing and pursue other goals at the moment, and I’d really like it if she was allowed to do this (join forces with Shinobu to drag karuta into a professional league, girl!). I’d like to think that in that space, different bonds and relationships can develop and strengthen, starting with Arata and Taichi.

Taichi the overanalyzer, the hardworker and the looker, the golden boy who at some point surely hit that red button, meme-style: you will be perfect at everything, you will have everything, except the one thing that you want above all. Arata appears to be his perfect foil: steady and serene where Taichi’s scrambling and flawed, adorably awkward and disarmingly sincere where Taichi’s groomed, smooth and miserable about his own deceptions. But they don’t see it like that! And they keep tripping each other up so beautifully!

I’d love to read your take on them growing closer and hopefully smooshing their faces together. Roommates in Tokyo? Long-distance friends? Figuring out how to tell your flatmate you’ve been in love with him since you were 12? Established relationship while hijinks happen? AWKWARD THIRDWHEELING WITH SUOU?!

On that note:

Suou Hisashi & (or / - wejustdon’tknow.gif) Mashima Taichi

I cannot believe that ridiculous man. Did you see a grown ass adult swoon because his unrequited disciple I mean not-friend I mean Taichi just up and went to meet his relatives??? To  help reconnect them?? One can do things like this?? What next, being able to make phonecalls like an adult??

Does not compute.

I was there, Gandalf. I was there when the story first indicated that we might be getting an unlikely team-up of the world’s weirdest Meijin and Tokyo’s most miserable overachiever. But even in my wildest dreams I did not dare hope to see them sprawled on the carpet on a humid summer afternoon, Taichi comfortable in his own skin and Suou, erm, probably not very comfortable with his fascination :D He did not sign up for this. He, a grown ass man in what must be his early twenties, is too old for this youthful seishun sakura bullshit. And yet it is he who mournfully accosts Taichi’s mom to talk about how this other boy is paramount in Taichi’s universe. He who gets offended because Taichi knowing how to adult and work the social ropes is too sexy and competent. He who finds something compelling in the painful struggle of genius and skill.

Arata - Taichi - Suou

For maximum indulgence of yours truly, bring those into one place. Arata coming to Tokyo and finding Suou a fixture in Taichi’s life how?! Suou being infinitely pissy at the Fukuyi upstart and yet dragging himself to socialize with the boys regardless like a totally-not-pathetic adult with a social life of his own? Arata being mildly puzzled about the antagonism, but in there for the sweet snacks?

You tell me! I delight in my anticipation.

NIRVANA IN FIRE: Mei Changsu, Xiao Jingyan

Is this a complex, narratively inevitable historic tapestry strangling people with its treads, full of delicious politicking and identity porn? Yes, it is.

Is my burning – nay, primal – desire so simple as to smoosh two faces together and watch them kiss? Yes, it is :’)

I mean, I will obviously not say no if the kissing is giftwrapped in the said tapestry of beautiful, politicky plot, but the fever I can’t get out of my system is this: LET THEM KISS, GODDAMMIT. LET THEM BE HAPPY. I welcome canon divergences, alternative endings, fix-its, insert eps and codas where it looks like they would have kissed (erm, or at least confronted each other in a way that would inevitably end with them making out) if only Mei Changsu wasn’t so caught up in self-loathing and fluffy foxfur coats, and Jingyan didn’t talk too loudly about his so dead, so very dead beautiful ex to hear Mei Changsu weep stoically into his beautiful white furs.

I adore Prince Jing. He is 90% cheekbones and 20% heartbroken pouting over his so very dead friends, and all of it noble and awkward and stubborn and deserving of happiness. Mei Changsu is ridiculous, and capable, and twisted into pretzels of his own creation: not above gloating over his enemies while daintily dipping cookies into his tea, he gets too caught up in weaving the tapestry to notice he is a part of it.  Pull him off his high horse, Jing! Render him helpless by being yourself! Do something about being hopelessly charmed with each other, through resentment, loss, bitter pining, and narrative inevitability! JUSTKISSALREADY.gif!!

THUNDERBOLT FANTASY: Rin Setsua; Sho Fukan

I LOVE THIS SELF INDULGENT WUXIA NONSENSE AND I CANNOT LIE!

Sanfan is a mixture UTTER GLEE and deep fondness for the genre staples, self-aware and masterful playthrough of all the wuxia tropes in the book, and one goddamn well-constructed story. It plays the tropes straight, calls them out with a knowing wink, walks the tightrope between the two with panache, and just as you are relaxed and enjoying this trapeze show, it grins cheekily at you, sets the discoball on fire and pulls a bunny out of a hat.  It’s DELIGHTFUL and fun and lovingly crafted, just like a good passion project should be.

I want anything that capitalizes on the absolutely hilarious dynamics between Rin Setsua and Sho Fukan (and while personally I end up using the Japanese versions of their names more often, please feel free to go with the Chinese names if you prefer). Sho Fukan does not want any of those heroic quests, he’s the human equivalent of been there, done that mood, and he just wants to REST and hopefully dump a bunch of magical murderswords someplace safe. Rin Setsua is a Totally Respectable and Non-Villainous Member of Society, of which he will inform you firsthand in the most high spoken and verbose way possible, and maybe even produce paperwork that has definitely not been tampered with. He harbours no ulterior motives, ever, and does not trail behind Sho Fukan for any reason beyond the pleasure of his company, and his mission to personally victimize and cockblock every morally derelict villain in two countries, by no-one’s request.

Whether you go shipfic (yiss!) or canon levels teamup circus (also yiss!), don’t hold back your horses. Everything about this is Extra, and should continue to be so <3

I am okay with both expanding the canon and playing with AUs/crossovers/fusions for this one, provided they retain the character dynamics. I love the extended cast as well: any characters including the Seiyou gang (and on that note, if you want to write the Seiyou backstory for Shou’s gang that has no Rin in it, you’re welcome as well), reappearance of the familiar faces from Touri (read: Rin’s victim list, past, future and present), original characters lined up and waiting to be screwed over (guaranteed) and rescued (the administration does not bear any responsibility etc etc).

Thank you for taking the time to read the letter, and I’m greatly looking forward to reading your story — and hopefully, getting to chat about these ridiculous and wonderful characters post-reveals :)

[piraticalarchive]

okay so i honestly can't remember who followed who first, all i know is that taylor you have been a staple on my dash since the very early days and i wouldn't have had it any other way. i've always cared very little for ouat killian but thanks to you i no longer have to care about him at all because i have /your/ killian and that's all that matters to me these days. i've stayed all these years because as well as a talent, you're a fab human and someone i'm honoured to call a friend :'))

why’d you follow meme? i think? I cant remember.

Lottie, I just , and Jack just- and you just - You’re one of the few people I literally cannot imagine my dash or life without. I don’t remember who followed who first either, but I think it was me because I creeped on a thread you had with amy and i was like ohhohoho pirate buddies ... and, alas, they became the farthest thing from pirate buddies. But, the last six years writing with you have been so much fun. The relationships that have developed between Killian and Jack are truly something for the record books and with every crazy au we drag them into it just gets a little bit more exciting. I don’t know how to choose a verse or a thread to pick out of the bunch because I literally love them all - but i think one of my most favored ones is the intricate plot and world we’ve created through Morgana on your multi and Jack with detective Killian and the whole thing surrounding Uther and Beckett. And the addition of John and Guy too is just -  It is chefs kiss. I could go on forever because honestly more and more things are coming to mind (the umbrella thread for one, spice world, professors, the british bake off...) and I could literally list every single thread we have ever done and I don’t think it’d cover it. You bring life to Jack (and all of your muses) in a way that no one else possibly can, and whenever I see or hear or even think of anything to do with potc and Jack Sparrow, your name and your blog immediately come to mind. I shudder to think what an empty place tumblr would be without your presence - and I will forever be so incredibly grateful that I stumbled across you and forged this amazing writing partnership which turned into a wonderful friendship. I am so honored to know you and I wish you the best forever and ever and it will be a cold dark day in the pirate rp world when you and jack decide your journey is done. Aka - it’ll never happen. I won’t allow it <33. Though there are other pirate roleplayers that I love and enjoy - You, Jen and Ace make up my little pirate family and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. All my love, forever and ever. I’m glad you are out of quarantine and feeling good!! Please bless us all and share that drabble you mentioned :)

[hyaciiintho]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; mun & muse - meme.

TAGGED BY:  @bxstiae​ (Thank you bby ♡) TAGGING: @valliantheart, @dolcetters, @atimelesslullaby, @telesthisia, @shadowborders (Do it for Wild!!-- if you wanna haha~), and uhh... anyone else who wants to do this, just say I tagged ya !! 

FILL OUT & REPOST ♥ this meme definitely favors canons more, but i hope oc’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. multi-muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

MY MUSE IS:   CANON / OC / AU (Verse dependent) / CANON-DIVERGENT (Interactions & verse dependent) / FANDOMLESS

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES (Literally everyone who played OoT on the N64 has already confessed he was their first crush LMAO) / NO / IDK

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK

Are they underrated?  YES / NO

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO / MAYBE

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO / MAYBE

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL

HOW STRICTLY DO YOU FOLLOW CANON?  ❀ || Interaction dependent. I’m flexible with bending some of the story to help incorporate characters, or even interchanging some game with manga canon to incorporate other stuff (like for my interactions with the-nexus’s Volvagia !!). But mostly I do try to follow canon, and base headcanons off of canon in an effort to expand upon what is already given to us.

SELL YOUR MUSE! AKA TRY TO LIST EVERYTHING, WHICH MAKES YOUR MUSE INTERESTING IN YOUR OPINION TO MAKE THEM SPICY FOR YOUR MUTUALS.   ❀ || Oh boy I get to talk him up !! Link-- The Hero of Time-- is entirely selfless and incredibly brave, having grown up far too fast from the horrifically young age of ten (10), and still maintains a pure heart. His story is of one of unimaginable loss and still finding the strength to move forward, to carry on and continue doing what is right, but don’t let his sunshine smile fool you. He’s gotten very good at pretending and deflecting questions, even if he’s not a very good liar, he’s a very convincing actor. Maybe getting close enough would open this long locked door and allow him to spill some personal woes previously unspoken...?

A hero forgotten by time, he’s renowned for his good deeds alone, not for any world-saving heroics, but because he’s just that guy who helps everyone-- at the expense of himself, no less. Musical virtuoso, a huge flower lover (peep them aesthetics ♡), self-made master swordsman and archer, and accidental time-traveller... he’s bound to get into some interesting situations with your muse, one way or another!

NOW THE OPPOSITE, LIST EVERYTHING WHY YOUR MUSE COULD NOT BE SO INTERESTING (EVEN IF YOU MAY NOT AGREE, WHAT DOES THE FANDOM PERHAPS THINK?).   ❀ ||  He’s predictable. You got your typical good-guy hero with his sad sob story and mountain of piling regrets. You’ve heard the story a thousand times. His tale is overrated and passed its time. This physically pained me to write, nope lmao no more, the fandom can back right off of my boy, he’s a CLASSIC and a STAPLE in gaming history ♡

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO RP YOUR MUSE?   ❀ || Ocarina of Time was not my first Zelda game (That honor goes to Zelda 2: The Adventure of Link ♡), but it was the most memorable because it was my first owned game. I had gotten the NES as a hand-me-down from my aunt, and she had all these games for it. I played both Zelda’s 1 & 2 (but played 2 first because it was GOLD and SHINY) but then that year, for Christmas... My Ma got me Ocarina of Time for the N64, and boy did I never play anything else unless my cousins were over, then we played Smash bros BUT !! The Hero of Time was my, well... hero for a lifetime. His story created the artist in me. I wanted to draw this cool and cute boy in green, who at the time, was my age too. If he could go out and fight evil monsters, then I could become an artist.

I never beat OoT until years��later. I had a rough childhood growing up, constantly moving around, leaving behind friends, family, and places I had held dear to my heart. This, among other things I won’t go into detail, all came at me at a crucial point of my growth-- It was relatable to how Link left his childhood behind and was forced to grow up so awfully fast, and I clung to that. Then Majora’s Mask came out and it was everywhere in WalMarts as playable demos... I spent hours just playing the same intro sequences because that was my hero, once again, on another quest! The same kid who inspired my creativity, was alive as a little muse for comics and stories-- there he was!! Again!!! I was so happy.

Fast forward years later (and I mean YEARS later) Hyrule Warriors came out, and by then, I had roleplayed other muses out of fandom. After putting in hours into that game, I said huh... I wonder if the LoZ community is active in the roleplay scene... and boy was it ♡ Now I get to write my boy and his inspirational tale of strength and bravery in the face of loss and trauma, and it’s something I will never get tired of screaming from the high roof tops !!

WHAT KEEPS YOUR INSPIRATION GOING?  ❀ ||  It’s hard to say sometimes, when mental health takes frequent downs before coming back up... I’d have to say it’s all of my followers, to be honest? Everyone who’s reached out or followed, who’s looked at my blog and pages and went yeah, this guy sounds pretty cool, whether or not they actually know who The Hero of Time is. And it’s crazy to think that there are people out there who don’t know who he is. Their first game was Wind Waker, or Twilight Princess, or Breath of the Wild, and it’s absolutely insane when I think about that.

So I guess... my inspiration to keep going is basically just... to keep his story alive. I’ve seen countless other Hero of Time muses grow active, only to fall to the wayside within a few months, and it’s heartbreaking to see his character become abandoned due to the muns not having that very same inspiration or motivation to keep going. Those who do-- I’m happy to see people still picking up his muse. I wish I could gather all of the Hero of Time roleplayers and just support them to the fullest ♡ unfortunately duplicate anxiety is a thing for almost all the ones I came across, so I’ll just cheer them from afar so they’re comfy !! 

SOME MORE PERSONAL QUESTIONS FOR THE MUN.

give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO but boy do I try my hardest...

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES though I haven’t in a WHILE... / NO

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES I used to not but... I made him mine, and I like how he’s turned out ♡ / NO 

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO  it’s a ‘mental health pending’ sorta situation haha~

Are you a sensitive person?  YES a-always... / NO

DO YOU ACCEPT CRITICISM WELL ABOUT YOUR PORTRAYAL?   ❀ || I do, but only in regards to things I explicitly state as being derived from canon. Roleplay is about your unique portrayal. It’s why we call our muses muses and not characters. The Character is the canon version. The muse is our personal spin on it. There are no two muses that are alike, but there is always one character they are based off of. If people don’t like my portrayal then I don’t need criticism over it, and instead, invite them to seek out another roleplayer with a portrayal they do like. I’m never, ever, going to change anything about my muse, because he is MY muse ♡ Just as I would never ever ask someone to change something about their muses, because they are theirs and theirs alone.

DO YOU LIKE QUESTIONS, WHICH HELP YOU EXPLORE YOUR CHARACTER?   ❀ || Absolutely, but doesn’t everyone? (⺣◡⺣)♡ Sometimes I’m so focused on replying to threads or answering asks, that I’m too busy to really try and further explore his world and development. It really helps make me stop and go Oh!... Yeah that’s a good question! 

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES TO A HEADCANON OF YOURS, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY?   ❀ || I would be interested to see why and their reasons for it, but if it’s once more in regards to what I said earlier (More of a muse thing and not a canon-based thing), then I would probably enjoy a good discussion as to why it fits my muse rather than his canon character. He’s always evolving and has years worth of interactions and growth behind him... what he wouldn’t have done before, but does now, is just all about growth and being molded by that. But I would definitely enjoy hearing other people’s opinions and their personal takes !!

IF SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH YOUR PORTRAYAL, HOW WOULD YOU TAKE IT?   ❀ || I would be perfectly fine. Like I said before, I invite them to find someone else instead rather than waste their energy telling me they don’t like my muse haha~ I’m perfectly comfortable with how I write my Hero of Time muse. He’s got years worth of memories and development, so of course he’s not gonna be 100% what the original concept was. We’re all here to have fun, so go find someone to have fun with if I’m not the one (◡‿◡✿) 

IF SOMEONE REALLY HATES YOUR CHARACTER, HOW DO YOU TAKE IT?   ❀ || People are allowed to have opinions. They’re wrong, but-- hdshjk I’M JOKING but seriously, if you really hate the Hero of Time, then 1) I question your choices and 2) don’t follow me?? It’s common sense??? I had once had someone follow me who seemed to meme hard on the Hero of Time and downplayed everything he did in canon (”I did it because a tree told me to” was the memorable quote) and I just ?? Was so confused... like if you’re gonna insult my character? Why do you follow me? So I unfollowed and moved on, plain and simple. No argument. No anger. No outrage. Just. Silently unfollowed and carried on being happy with my flower child ♡

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PEOPLE POINTING OUT YOUR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS?   ❀ ||  No, not really. I’m doing this for fun, not to be schooled on how to write properly. If I want to use a million “--”s in between my breaks for dramatic tension or format a certain way that breaks proper grammar then ?? I’m sorry? This isn’t the blog for you haha~ <--- oh that right there too is an improper use of that, but I do it anyways c: Spelling though... please point out my spelling errors LMAO

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE EASY GOING AS A MUN?    ❀ || I think I am..? I try to be, at least. I’m always willing to bend my canon and be flexible for others to be able to incorporate their own muses into the story, and often go out of my way to try and make it easier for others by having Link time-jump into their “era” which is just their personal main verse so that everyone wins and gets to keep their canon ♡ I always try and invite others to approach me, and I always seem busy or like I’m disinterested in others, but trust me when I say that’s not the case. My brain is constantly running a mile a second and I have hundreds of things I want to go at any given moment, but with the handicap of mental health and disabilities, I always end up looking like I ignore everyone c’: I’m just a potato guys... a sweet potato... but a potato nonetheless...

But I’m always open to plot, to talk about muses, to send stuff into your inbox if you found something you’d like me to send in-- it’s even in my rules that you’re 110% okay with poking me like hey I reblogged this thing... could you send it in?? and I’d be like hell yeah, let’s get this bread. But... yeah, I’d say I’m easygoing... even if I’m quiet and reserved most of the time. I just don’t have the self-confidence to really put myself out there as loudly as others can, and often fall into the background or let others do the talking/typing when having conversations, and it’s really not great for my mental health, but I want my friends to be happy !! So I !! TRY MY BEST!!!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧ 

[sworntoprotect]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent (the mere existence of a post-canon verse is diverging from canon) / fandomless / complicated

Is your character popular in the fandom? YES / NO. He started off as a tertiary character in the mage origin/Broken Circle quest in DAO, then ended up becoming something of a staple tertiary/secondary character in DA2 and DAI.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK. I’m not entirely sure how people feel about DAO Cullen’s appearance but DA2 and onwards he got himself a glow-up and an unwitting thirst trap reputation. What made ramen boy appealing in DAO for some is that if you played a female mage Warden, he’s “the one who got away”... because he literally booked it down the corridor if you got too flirty.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK. Perhaps? If you take a stroll through his tag, despite being a Templar, he’s not often portrayed as someone who’s fighting (*winkwonk*).

Are they underrated? YES / NO / IDK. Some in the fandom might even call him overrated, depending on who you ask. 

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO. In DAO he begs for you to kill all the remaining mages in the Circle Tower, and you can accept or decline to do so. In DA2 he solicits a few quests and eventually sides with you to defeat Meredith. In DAI he’s the Commander of the Inquisition and a vital part of the war council. Overall, he’s there to provide a pro-Templar outlook for the character. 

Were they relevant for the main character? YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG. He’s met every game protagonist thus far and had some level of personal/professional relationship with them. 

Are they widely known in their world? YES / NO. In DAO he was a newly minted Templar. DA2 he was elevated to Knight-Captain very quickly which got his name floating around Kirkwall, and of course by DAI he’s the head of the Inquisition’s forces so he’s even more well-known throughout (at the least) Ferelden and Orlais.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. Both. The common people and fellow Templars would look up to him, whereas mages and pro-mage sympathisers would absolutely have an issue with the role he’s played over the years.

How strictly do you follow canon? — As closely as I can, without lingering too deeply into the “problematic views” part of his character. I don’t seek to erase them or ignore them, and I don’t have too much issue writing them for the sake of being genuine, but I also don’t want to write him as if he’s some mustache-twirling villain because he is not. 

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  Since he was 18 years old, Cullen has suffered and struggled through adversity after adversity (torture, sexual assault, brainwashing, night terrors, drug abuse, and a healthy spoonful of “all my friends are dead”), and yet maintained a soft heart underneath the steel wall of being a warrior. His goal since childhood has been to serve and to protect, and his self-awareness, loyalty, intelligence, and drive to make himself a better and more caring man is what sets him apart from others of his ilk who in his shoes would’ve broken a long, long time ago.

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  — He’s a man who’s allowed atrocities to occur by not standing up to speak against them, has perpetuated the cycle of mage abuse by the hands of others, can be callous, closed-minded, and aggressive, and has a strong prejudice against mages that wasn’t properly resolved in his “redemption” arc – nor was his lyrium addiction/withdrawal.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  He’s the type of muse I gravitate towards: bookish, devoted, protective, a softy under all the stone, endearingly awkward. More than that, though, his story intrigues me. Cullen has gone through a lot (he’s either the luckiest or unluckiest person) and watching his trajectory throughout the series has been really interesting. I’d like to provide him proper growth and development that he wasn’t entirely given in the games, or that wasn’t explicitly shown.

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  My amazing roleplay partners with all the good work they put into their characters and the love they have shown me and my character so far. I love you guys <3  (<-- keeping that answer bc agreed)

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO / I SINCERELY HOPE I DO? i have my doubts sometimes, but i think i do ok. Still, I would love to have more feedback to see how i can improve even more. (<-- keeping bc agreed)

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO / SORT OF I write quite a few of them that never see the light of day, and I constantly and randomly sling little thoughts at my rp partners as they come to me. As for this blog itself, I’d prefer to have my headcanons evident in my writing, so I don’t post things about Cullen’s favourite colour or what he likes to eat for supper every night (and that’s absolutely no shade to people who do post headcanons that way; I honestly wish I operated the same way lol)

Do you sometimes write drabbles? YES / NO. There’s a few on the blog already, hidden in plain sight.

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO. Even when I don’t want to think about him, I end up thinking about him. But I like thinking about him, so...

Are you confident in your portrayal? YES / NO / SORT OF? I’m still fairly new to the fandom and I’ve been learning a lot about Cullen, what people think about Cullen, what Cullen thinks about himself and others, etc. etc. Plus there are other, more well-established blogs for him out there. I’m honestly surprised I got more than 20 followers tbh.

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO / SOMETIMES. I'm my own worst enemy with this one. Like, I know I’m alright but I’m not good enough for myself.

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO / SORTA. Some things do bother me a lot more than others, but any annoyance I feel is pretty quickly done after I vent about it. Then I typically forget after a while.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  I’m always open to constructive criticism that both highlights what I’m doing well and considerately points out what I could improve upon. 

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  — Of course! I enjoy delving into his character and wondering the “what ifs” of various situations that may or may not occur. And if we can write it together in a thread? Even better!

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  No one owes me an explanation as to why they have an opinion, but yes I would like to know why. Maybe I misinterpreted something, or overlooked something. Maybe I made a mistake. I’m human. It happens.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —  same as the above.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  — It only bothers me if it’s directed at me. I fully acknowledge that Cullen is controversial and has a very contentious past (or present) that rubs a good amount of people the wrong way. You don’t have to like him, but I do take some issue with people purposely twisting facts to make him out to be worse than what he actually is. I’ve considered writing a post about it truthfully but I don’t want that unbridled hatred to come to my doorstep if/when someone who’s not a fan of him reads it. It’s not worth it. Might do it anyway though. I don’t know.

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  — Please do. Politely. English is my native language but I’m still out here making mistakes. smh @ myself

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  I’d like to think so, yes. I have a very high tolerance level for a lot of things, don’t get easily triggered, and I’m always willing to chat about character stuff or irl stuff or... anything, basically. 

tagged by: @orsino-the-enchanter tagging: did you read this? then it’s you

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

Six Baudelaires AU, Part Two: Reference Guide

A quick guide for everything I intentionally referenced in The Six Siblings, Part Two: This Tale is All Sorrows and Woes.

{ao3} {tumblr} {part one reference guide} 

MAJOR SPOILER WARNING - the plot twists from this section of the fanfiction will be discussed at length. 

Without further ado…

Chapter One / Prologue - in which Lilac has to Older Sister

“Release Nick, you fiend!” Violet tackled Klaus to the ground, as both of her brothers burst into giggles. “Never! Nick’s my prisoner of war!” Klaus said, trying (and failing) to push her off.

Nick being the “captive” in the childrens’ game throughout the chapter is a bit of an obvious foreshadow to his captivity from Chapters 12-20... which meant it was really fun when none of you noticed until then and then tried to kill me. XD

A full reference of the books namedropped in the childrens’ game:

Violet and Nick’s kingdom, Terabithia, is from Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson. Their original characters, either Susan/Lucy and Peter/Edmund, are a reference to The Chronicles of Narnia by CS Lewis. 

Lilac and Klaus’s kingdom, Gwyntystorm, and their characters, Irene and Curdie, are from The Princess and the Goblin and its sequel, The Princess and Curdie, by George MacDonald. 

Lilac says she thought Nick was Eragon, from The Inheritance Cycle by Christopher Paolini, and Klaus says he was Aragorn, from The Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien. Nick’s suggestion for a new name, Glaedr, is also a character from The Inheritance Cycle. Nick finally decides to be Peter Pan, obviously from Peter Pan by JM Barrie. 

“Naw, they definitely are.” Nick nodded. “When a new baby is born, one of the other children has to die. Everyone knows it.” [...] “Now, since it’s a girl maybe, they could take out one of them,” he gestured towards Violet and Lilac, “But you’re the most useless, Klaus, so-” [...] “But yeah. Babies suck and we should totally throw our sister off the roof.” 

Direct reference to Addams Family Values (1993)

“Watch me.” Nick’s eyes lit up. “Wait, no, better plan. You guys remember Moses-”

Reference to the story of Moses, who was placed in a basket in a river as an infant. 

Lilac quickly answered the phone, saying, “Baudelaire residence. This is Lilac Emily. To whom am I presently speaking?” 

Lilac’s middle name is taken from her actress, Emily Browning. 

“We’re sensible and proper!” Nick added.

A reference to S Theodora Markson’s catchphrase in All the Wrong Questions. 

“What was that, Dad? No, no real ropes. Yeah, promise. We’ll go to bed on time, too. But you’ll all be back in the morning? Yeah, I know. Don’t open the windows.”

The Baudelaire parents don’t want to risk their children getting recruited. 

“He said we have a new sister.” Lilac reported. “Solitude Theodora Baudelaire.”

A direct reference to S Theodora Markson. 

“Can we make a blanket fort?” Klaus asked. “Like we used to?”

Much like the last prologue, this is a reference to the scene from the 2004 film. 

Rest of the fic under the cut. 

Chapter Two - in which the Baudelaires move into a nice Shack

As he stood, Nick turned to look at his brother, and after a second, he realized something. “Wait a minute.” he said. “Are you… taller than me?”

A reference to Louis Hynes’s growth spurt inbetween TMM and TAA in the Netflix series. (Though, fun fact, at this moment in time, Liam Aiken is currently taller than Louis Hynes, so I guess Nick eventually does end up taller.) 

Violet groaned and stood, and Solitude said, “Winnie,” which meant, “We could have Babbitt judge; they’re good with numbers!”

A reference to the main character of Babbitt’s namesake, Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt. 

After a moment, Nick said, “I’ll give you a tip.” “Yes?” Nick smiled slightly. “There’s a book, about the mother of a girl who reminds me a lot of you, in that everyone thinks she is adorable and perfect. The mother gets scared when the girl’s classmate drowns on a field trip and her daughter steals something shiny off of him, and she then finds out that she has a very suspicious genealogy.”

Nick giving tips in the form of book recommendations is a reference to Lemony’s habit of doing the same thing to Pip and Squeak in All the Wrong Questions. This is a double reference, as Liam Aiken, Nick’s actor, read the audiobooks for ATWQ. 

The book he is referencing is The Bad Seed by William March. 

“Gah-ahc.” said Solitude, which meant, “Let’s sleep outside.”

One of Soli’s lines in the 2004 film. 

Chapter Three - in which the Baudelaires make new friends 

Sunny narrowed her eyes. “Armoracia,” she muttered, which meant something like, “That doesn’t sound right. Apples and Horseradish taste very differently.”

Early foreshadowing for Sunny’s cooking interest. 

“I can get the windows,” Lilac said, “Should be an ordinary-enough pin-tumbler lock.”

The phase “ordinary enough pin-tumbler lock” is repeated a lot, as a reference to the second All the Wrong Questions book, When Did You See Her Last? 

“Yeah, there’s no locks.” Duncan said. “Bonnie said that they fell off a few years ago and never got replaced.”

A reference to a main character from The Wolves of Willoughby Chase by Joan Aiken. 

Chapter Four - in which Duncan and Isadora break into a Library 

“See? Researcher. Like Klaus.” Nick said. Klaus narrowed his eyes at his twin, trying to figure out what Nick was on about. “Is that… really important?” “Yes.” Nick said, and failed to elaborate. [...] “I think Klaus and Duncan should take the fungus.” Violet said, sharing a look with Nick. “The rest of us can keep an eye out for that book.” “Why should we take the fungus?” Violet held back a smile and shrugged, but Klaus quickly figured out what was going on. His face went red, and he glared at her, but Duncan said, “I’m fine with that,” so all he could do was shrug and keep shooting his siblings dark looks.

Violet and Nick are trying to set Duncan and Klaus up, much to Lilac’s horror. 

“Like a little cat.” Duncan said. “One of those feral ones that are super tiny.”

A reference to the world’s smallest cat, the Rusty-spotted cat. 

“That doesn’t sound right, but I really don’t give a shit.” Nick shrugged. “We’ll find it, won’t we, Soli?”

A reference to a line from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia episode 5x03, “The Great Recession”, which later became a meme - “That doesn’t sound right, but I don’t know enough about stars to dispute it.” 

Chapter Five - in which the children run amok at Prufrock Prep 

“You’re lucky.” Isadora said, sitting on the edge of the roof and kicking her legs as she looked down at the dying grass fields. “Our parents’ estate’s executor doesn’t give a fuck until orphans are ‘in’, whatever the hell that means.”

As revealed in The Slippery Slope book, Esme was left in charge of the Quagmires’ estate. 

Lilac giggled. “Yeah. Mom used to have [a necklace] just like it, except instead of these gear patterns, it had her initials. I always thought it was pretty, but she never let me wear it, so I learned how to make my own. She was… so proud.”

2004 Film Violet does indeed have a necklace throughout the entire film; I just added a backstory. 

“Nick Liam Baudelaire, what the hell is that?” Lilac shouted.

Nick’s middle name is in reference to his actor, Liam Aiken. 

“Marbeau,” said Sunny, meaning, “Maybe they’ve finally opened a daycare or toddler school.”

A reference to Firmin Marbeau, who pioneered a forerunner of modern daycare. 

Chapter Six - in which the Baudelaires have Gym Class 

“Tik,” said Sunny, meaning, “No! Typing and stapling is so hard when we’re tired!”

“Tik” spelled backwards is “Kit”, which, no, is not a reference to Kit Snicket, but Kit Kittredge, who famously carries a typewriter. 

“Say goodbye to Nick, Solitude.” Lilac said, grabbing the toddler’s hand and dragging her to her feet.

Another bit of foreshadowing for Nick’s capture. 

“Olil.” Sunny groaned. “Leave me alone to die.”

“Olil” spelled backwards is “Lilo”, as Sunny is directly quoting a line from Lilo & Stitch (2002). 

“Speaking of which,” Carmelita said, “As this is the second message I gave you, I really deserve a tip at this point.” “There’s a book about what happens when you let a bunch of schoolchildren run around unsupervised,” Klaus said, “And it features a pig’s head on a stick.”

Once again, the book recommendation instead of a tip is an All the Wrong Questions reference. 

Klaus is recommending Lord of the Flies by William Golding.

Chapter Seven - in which Nick gets them all in Even More Trouble 

“I’m just telling you what I was told to tell you.” Carmelita giggled. “And since this is my eleventh message, you’re overdue eleven tips.” “We gave you our tips.” Nick said, glaring at her. “But here’s today’s; there’s a book that was made into a popular film that is about a hound dog and a fox. In the book, at the end, the hound kills the fox.”

Once again, ATWQ reference with the tips. 

The book he’s recommending is The Fox and the Hound by Daniel P Mannix; and, yes, that IS how the book ends. The Hound dies, too. You’re welcome for ruining your childhood. 

“Klaus?” he sounded very uncharacteristically terrified. “Klaus? Are you okay?” Klaus, startled, quickly stumbled out, “Y-yeah, I’m fine…” as Lilac and Violet also jumped up, grabbing the infants, and the Quagmires hurried to their feet. “Did your glasses break?” “No, I’m-” “Are you hurt?” Nick pulled away from his slightly, his eyes moving fast as he scanned his brother.

While Nick’s PTSD worsens much later, the first signs of it start showing here; he’s still traumatized from Klaus’s hypnotism, which was always kicked off with him getting tripped and his glasses breaking. 

“I wouldn’t say that.” said Nick, glaring down at the floor. He hadn’t looked anybody in the eye since he’d attacked Carmelita.

Nick isn’t ashamed of attacking Carmelita; he’s ashamed that he “overreacted” to something so minor. He doesn’t like admitting he needs help, which becomes a problem after his capture. 

“We know what homeschooling is.” Violet said. “We were-”

In this continuity, the Baudelaires were homeschooled before the fire. 

“Halloween, age nine,” Isadora said, “Was when we wanted to go as a certain family of six children. The problem being that there’re only three of us.”

A reference to The Brady Bunch. 

“We know you’re not asking.” Isadora said, smiling. “We’re volunteering.”

whelp. 

Chapter Eight - in which Lilac Snaps 

No major references in this chapter. 

Chapter Nine - in which the Baudelaires are given Fashion Lessons 

They fell silent again, and then quietly, Lilac started to sing. She sang a song that was normally played very loud and energetic, but she gave it a slower melody, quietly soothing Sunny as they walked up and up the large staircase. It was a song about how everybody’s looking for something, and as they walked, listening to Lilac’s soft voice, they all really hoped that whoever was looking for the Quagmires would find them quickly.

A reference to “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)” by Eurythmics, but more specifically, a reference to Emily Browning’s cover version.

“Ah, you’re very adventurous!” Jerome said. “Just like your mother. We were friends a ways back. We hiked up Mount Fraught with some friends- gosh, it must have been twenty years ago-” [...] “Hmm? Oh, no, just the Snickets and that Markson boy.” Lilac narrowed her eyes. “Who?”

“That Markson boy” is a reference to the theory that Bertrand Baudelaire was adopted by S Theodora Markson’s family. Lilac’s recognition is not of her father’s maiden name, but of “Snicket”, which she vaguely remembers from her childhood. 

Chapter Ten - in which the In Auction is planned 

Currently, the Baudelaires were spread out in the living room. Nick and Klaus were trying to read through a book on Emily Dickinson that they’d bought the other day, while Violet and Lilac were going through the newspaper, trying to find something interesting, or some news on the search for Count Olaf.

The Baudelaires miss the Quagmires so much they’ve accidentally picked up their habits; Emily Dickinson is a famous poet, and Violet and Lilac are reading the newspaper. 

“She seems like the kind of person who’d try to set me up with some rich kid.” Nick said. “And I’m never getting married, not even when I’m older. I’m gonna live alone in the woods, and the only one who can come visit me is Soli.”

Nick is aromantic. 

“Ihering!” Soli said, which meant something like, “I’ll live with you and we can raise reptiles in the woods!”

A reference to Hermann von Ihering, a zoologist. 

The waiter nodded. “I didn’t realize this was a sad occasion.” [...] “Did you say-?” Lilac began.

The waiter is a VFD agent; once again, Lilac vaguely recognizes the code phrase. 

Chapter Eleven - in which Klaus finds an Ersatz Elevator 

“I’m not going to let us chase red herrings!” Lilac shouted back, hurt.

Dark foreshadowing to the red herring statue. 

“Solitude is,” Nick said, moving past him to find a pencil and paper, “Sunny is the albatross that curses us.” “Doom!” Sunny cheered.

A reference to The Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge. 

“It worked.” Violet smiled. “We never expected otherwise.” Klaus said.

A reference to the line from “The Bad Beginning: Part One” in the Netflix series. 

Chapter Twelve - in which the Baudelaires fall 

“Not so bad.” Solitude muttered. Then, she said, “Radec,” which meant, “Just think of it as a ride, instead of an actual fall.”

“Radec” spelled backwards is “Cedar”; a lowkey reference to Cedar Point. 

“No, we’re going to make a lockpick.” Lilac said. “Flamethrower’s too volatile. Besides, I don’t trust you with it.”

“Too volatile” is a reference to the phrase being used in The Grim Grotto. 

She spun on her heel, exiting out a door behind them. As she did, Nick said, “Should I go after her and tell her the kitchen was out the other door?”

Esme went to call Olaf and the henchpeople, instead of going to the kitchen. 

“Yeet Babbitt.” Solitude suggested.

A reference to the vine/meme. 

They had to walk through a parlor to get to the door, and as they did, Nick stopped a moment, glancing at the phone. It didn’t look broken. “Hey, guys?” he called, but they didn’t hear him, so he started to run to catch up.

Nick started to run to catch up; he never did, because that’s when one of Olaf’s henchpeople grabs him. 

And then, with a swish, there was a thump, thump, thump, and the Baudelaires stopped falling.

Only three thumps- because Klaus and Lilac were carrying the toddlers, and Nick didn’t fall, only three kids hit the net. 

“Nhojnod!” Sunny shouted. “You bastard!”

“Njohnod” is “Don John” spelled backwards, a reference to the character from Much Ado About Nothing, who is a bastard in both the legal and ethical use of the term. 

Chapter Thirteen - in which Sunny crawls up an elevator shaft 

“Sunday Theodora Baudelaire!” Lilac shouted. “You get back down here right now!”

Sunny’s middle name, “Theodora”, is once again a reference to S Theodora Markson; even after her death, she’s still confusing people about what the S stood for. 

Sunny sighed and turned slightly towards them, calling out, “Salvo!” which probably meant something like, “I’m going to go get us some rope and see if I can find Nick! I’ll be back soon!”

“Salvo” is a Latin verb, meaning “to save.” 

Sunny bit her lip and shook her head. “Appentier,” she said, meaning, “He’s not in the penthouse, at least from what I saw.”

“Appentier” is a french word from which “penthouse apartment” is derived. 

“Kim?” Sunny asked, meaning, “Wait, we get leeway for being kidnapped?”

“Kim” is the name of the girl who is kidnapped in the film Taken (2008). 

Solitude glanced at her in confusion. “Greywater?” “Yes, Soli,” Violet said, “A word which here means, ‘basically piss and shit.’”

A reference to a line from IT: Chapter One (2017). 

Chapter Fourteen - in which Some Children are sold at auction 

“You’d be surprised what’s legal and what’s not, actually.” Esme said. “For instance, in our society, cannibalism is legal, but religiously frowned upon-” 

A reference to the only ASOUE canon that matters, the Real-Time Fandub. (part one, part two) 

“Very interesting.” Olaf said. “And I suppose you think that your dear sister Lilac will take care of you then?”

Olaf is taunting Nick here, as he’s about to drop quite a lot of secrets to him, but mainly that Lilac is his half-sister. 

Notably, Nick is the only Baudelaire not present in this header image. 

Chapter Fifteen - in which Nobody’s having a good time 

No major references in this chapter. 

Chapter Sixteen - in which Lilac has a bad plan 

For sapphires and fortunes we are held in here. Only you can end our fear.

Isadora’s poems are ever-so-slightly different in this AU, due to Nick’s presence. 

The addition of and fortunes indicates that Nick is still with them.

Until dawn comes, we cannot speak speak. No voices come from this sad beak.

“voices” is more specific than “words can”; Nick has already started to go nonverbal due to his trauma, and Duncan and Isadora are unable to yell through the statue. 

Chapter Seventeen - in which the Village makes a Big Mistake 

But as she passed the Baudelaires, her hand slipped, and the man turned and met Lilac’s eyes. He stared for a moment, as if he realized with a shock he recognized her from somewhere. Then, he said, very quietly, “The world is quiet here.”

Jacques is realizing that Lilac has Lemony’s eyes; if he hadn’t realized before she was his niece, he does now. He tries to signal her with a VFD codephrase. 

“Now,” Lilac said, “We will need full access to all your inventing materials.” “And I’ll need blueprints of the uptown jail.” Klaus said. “Dead fly.” said Solitude.

While this is an obvious reference to Soli wanting to feed Babbitt, it is also a reference to a similar request made by Wednesday Addams in the 1964 sitcom The Addams Family, episode 1x10, “Wednesday Leaves Home.” 

The first thing you read contains our clues: An initial way to speak to you.

“Our clues”, once again, signals that Nick is still with the Quagmires. 

Chapter Eighteen - in which Count Olaf was not murdered 

No major references in this chapter. 

Chapter Nineteen - in which the Twins get a Birthday Present 

“You won’t keep Nick.” Lilac added. “He’ll get away from you, and the Quagmires, too! We’re never going to give up, and neither are they!” “Baudelaires don’t give up!” Solitude shouted. Olaf just smiled. “I wouldn’t be too sure about that.”

Nick’s trauma has already caused him to shut down completely, and Olaf knows this. 

Inside these letters the eye will see Nearby are your loved ones and the VFD

Nick and the Quagmires are still together. 

Chapter Twenty - in which Sunny drives a Firetruck 

“Nick, hey.” Isadora slowly pulled away from Violet and Lilac and stepped closer to the fountain, her voice very soft. “Your siblings found us. We were right. They found us.”

The Quagmires aren’t as traumatized as Nick; they’ve learned how to avoid the wrath of their captors, and have complete faith that the Baudelaires will save them. Nick’s been tortured and told quite a lot of things that temporarily broke him.

Duncan and Isadora shared a glance, and to the Baudelaires’ surprise, Nick flinched and also shared the triplets’ look. “Well, that’s not a surprise.” Duncan said. “He was the brother of a man who-”

Duncan, Isadora and Nick all know about Jacques Snicket, his relationship to Lemony, and Lemony’s relationship to Lilac. 

Nick was backing away from the fence, eyes wide, gripping onto Solitude so hard his knuckles were white. Isadora ran forwards, and Lilac realized then that he was shaking uncontrollably. “Nick, Nick, it’s okay!” Isadora said. She reached forwards, grabbing his face. “Look at me! Look at me! Duncan-” Duncan ran over, putting a hand on Nick’s shoulder, as Nick said, “They’re going to find us. They’re going to catch us. They’re going to find us-”

A lot of Nick’s trauma came from punishments after he attempted to escape, so he goes into a panic whenever they’re about to be caught. 

At that moment, Solitude pushed Babbitt onto Nick’s shoulder and said, “Hold this!” She immediately started running, jumping over Lilac and crawling through the window and onto the seat beside Sunny. Then she slid to the floor and jumped on the gas pedal, causing them to take off again.

A reference to Pip and Squeak from All the Wrong Questions, who drove their taxi in a similar way. 

Klaus stared back, and then his gaze hardened, and his siblings had never seen him look so furious. “I’m going to kill them.” Klaus vowed, and he meant it. “I’m going to kill them, Nick.” Nick’s eyes widened, and for several seconds, he looked like he physically could not process what his brother had just said.

A running joke up to this point was that Nick would suggest murder and Klaus would remind him that was illegal; after seeing his brother in such a state of shock and fear, this gag drops as Klaus decides Olaf and his troupe have to die. 

Chapter Twenty-One - in which Nick is not feeling great 

Meanwhile, Klaus was leaning against the wall, with Nick leaning onto his shoulder, curled up so he could be as close to his brother as possible. He had his eyes shut, but Lilac knew he wasn’t asleep; she didn’t think he’d slept at all. 

A symptom of severe trauma is the loss of sleep, either because of nightmares, or fear of what could happen while in such a defenseless position. This will be explored in Part Three. 

Nick bit his lip, and then nodded and said, “I-I’m sorry-”

Nick’s gotten over the initial shock of his rescue, and he’s starting to regret breaking down and starting to hate being so obviously traumatized. 

“Wait, Li…” Nick paused. “Can I… can I talk to you?” “Of course.” Lilac said softly. Nick glanced from Klaus to Violet to the toddlers. “Alone?”

Nick has decided it’s Lilac’s right to know she has a different (possibly living?) biological dad than the rest of them, but he also knows it’s her decision who else she wants to know, hence why he wants to tell her alone. 

Nick looked up at Klaus, and said, “I-I…” he shut his eyes. “I thought I heard… no, no, I must’ve… I thought I heard her, but… I had to… she wouldn’t… have found us this fast…”

Esme and Olaf were Nick’s main tormentors; they trigger his panic attacks more than the presence of the rest of the troupe. 

“No! No, don’t leave!” Nick shouted, leaping forwards and grabbing Klaus’s arm.

Nick is absolutely terrified of isolation/abandonment, especially in enclosed spaces. 

“Never!” Klaus pushed Nick farther, incredibly terrified by just how quiet his brother was.

Nick was punished a lot for “backtalking” his captors, so when he’s around Olaf and Esme, he almost never speaks. 

Chapter Twenty-Two - in which the Baudelaires break into a Hospital 

“Dimidium,” Sunny said, which meant, “Well, it’s only half a hospital.”

“Dimidium” is a Latin noun, meaning “half.” 

“We could kick down the door.” Lilac suggested. Then, she gave Nick a small smile. “Remember, Nick? When you were locked in the closet and wanted Mom to kick down the door?”

A reference to a previous one-shot for the Six Baudelaires AU. 

“Do you think that’ll have the information we need?” Violet asked. Nick flinched again, and then he said, “Um-”

Nick heard the word “Snicket”, and immediately assumes the worst- that it’ll out Lilac to the rest of their siblings. 

Chapter Twenty-Three - in which Solitude steals some shit 

Nick still didn’t respond, and Violet’s voice broke. “You have to remember. You couldn’t have been younger than… six or seven. Mother and Father were so mad, when they found us I thought they were going to explode… but you weren’t even upset, I cried but you just said you’d… you’d heard some kind of animal cry, and you thought it might need help, and I was the only one awake to help you… they got even madder, told you you should’ve stayed with them, but you didn’t see anything wrong, and… Nick, please tell me you remember that…”

An animal cry is a signal from VFD recruiters to prompt the children to say the codephrase that begins recruitment. The Baudelaire parents don’t want their children recruited, and were terrified to wake up and find their children gone on a night that they could have been kidnapped. 

Violet carefully pulled the scraps from her pocket, spreading them out in front of her, while Klaus turned to Nick. “Did they tell you anything?” he asked. “While you were… with them? About VFD, or this whole ‘Snicket’ thing, or Olaf?” Nick didn’t look anyone in the eye. “There wasn’t… much time to chat. I only… Lilac, can we talk?”

Pretty much all of Nick’s pleas for Lilac to talk to her are brought on when Snicket is mentioned. 

Nick pulled away, scratching at his arm, “That’s not…”

POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING: IMPLIED SELF HARM

Nick’s arm scratches are a tic he picked up during his captivity; he starts to scratch whenever his captors are mentioned, to keep himself alert. This will be discussed and resolved in Part Three. 

Nick looked sharply up at her and said, “Mom stole from Esme. She wouldn’t give a shit.”

Nick knows about the theft of the sugar bowl, as well as the Opera Night. (which are separate incidents, fuck you Netflix.) He’s very pissed at his parents for keeping vital information from them. 

Chapter Twenty-Four - in which Violet makes a decision 

They went to the Js. Then, quietly, Nick said, “Can we go to the L cabinets?” “Why?” Lilac asked. Nick glanced towards his siblings, and then away. “Just a guess.” Lilac shrugged directed them to the Ls, and Nick flipped through one drawer, eyes narrowed. Then he shook his head. “Nothing here.”

He’s looking under both “Lemony” and “Lilac.” 

Nick paused. “I mean… we don’t have to- to watch it right away.”  [...] “Li, please,” he said, “Can we talk? Just outside, just the two of us, there’s something-”

Nick wants to be able to tell Lilac about the whole “Lemony Snicket” thing before they can risk having her find out from the file. 

“I did.” Jacques nodded. “I managed to contact-”

He managed to contact Quigley.

“We’ll find them.” Lilac swore. “Are you okay?” “Yeah.” “Are you scared?” “I’m scared you won’t let me make a flamethrower and turn it on that bitch.”

A reference to this incorrect quote, which is, of itself, a reference to a line from the television show Brooklyn Nine-Nine, episode 3x10, “Yippie Kayak.” 

Still no response. Lilac looked around in terror, her hand flying to her necklace. “Violet Malina Baudelaire! You get the fuck out here!”

Violet’s middle name is taken from her actress, Malina Weissman. 

Chapter Twenty-Five - in which Lilac breaks down 

“I’m not…” Lilac sniffled. “I’m not like you.” Nick froze. “What does that mean?” “You all are so close.” Lilac shut her eyes. “You and Solitude, you and Klaus, you and Violet, Violet and Klaus, Klaus and Sunny, Solitude and Sunny… all of you. You’re all each others’ best friends. None of you care about me like that. [...] I just… feel like… like there’s this wall between us. That we can’t see, but we can’t cross. And I can see you all… you all together. And I just… can’t be like that. Cause I have to be responsible? Cause I’m the oldest? Cause… cause I just can’t be loved?” “Li!” Nick put a hand on her cheek, turning her towards him. “Li, we do love you. You’re our big sister! You’re our sister! You are our family! Sure, we pick on you, but not because we hate you! We all love you, too!”

This is why Nick doesn’t take the opportunity to tell her about her heritage; he wants to wait for a moment where the information won’t give her more anxiety, or make her think she’s somehow less family. 

Nick paused a moment, and then he leaned his head on her shoulder, shut his eyes, and said, “They fuck you up, your Mom and Dad. [...] They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had, then add some extra, just for you.” Lilac stiffened for a second, and then carefully put an arm around Nick. “Where… where’d you learn that?” “The Library.” Nick lied.

Nick is quoting “This Be the Verse” by Philip Larkin, which is later quoted by Olaf in “The End.” He learned the poem during his captivity. 

“Nick.” Lilac wiped her eyes, and then put her hands on his. “It’s okay to… to talk about what happened to you.” Nick bit his lip. “That’s…” “I’ve been busy, yes, but I’ve also been scared. Scared that I’ll… I’ll hear something that makes everything worse.” Lilac’s eyes darted to the ground a moment, before going back up to Nick. “But I’ll listen. I want to hear you. I want you to tell me.”

TRIGGER WARNING: CSA MENTION

Lilac has been avoiding Nick in fear that he’ll explain what he suffered under Olaf. While she knows learning the details can help her better protect her brother, she is terrified that she won’t be able to handle it, and she’s completely terrified he might have been sexually assaulted, seeing as Olaf threatened to do that to Violet specifically to punish Lilac, and he had Nick under his control for a while. 

Nick smiled at her. “You can do anything, sis.”

Nick knows she’s biologically his half-sister, but he wants to make completely sure she knows he will always consider her his sister and his family, and nothing can change that. 

Chapter Twenty-Six - in which Klaus impersonates a Doctor 

Nick flinched. “You want to be like him?”

Something to note: After his capture, Nick never refers to Olaf or Esme by their names; just him or her. 

Nick took a deep breath. “These vents are a lot bigger than I thought, but, um… they’re still pretty cramped.” Solitude shrugged. Of course it didn’t seem cramped to her, she was only a little over two feet tall. “I was just… I’m not sure I like how small it is.”

Nick’s claustrophobia, gained from being trapped in a red herring, a statue, and possibly other small spaces inbetween, is starting up. 

“Doctor Howser.” Lilac said in an austrailian accent, thinking very fast. “We’re going to perform surgery soon.”

A reference to Doogie Howser, MD, which starred a young Neil Patrick Harris, who played Olaf in the Netflix series. 

“Since when could you do an Austrailian accent?” “You don’t know everything about me.” Lilac scanned the list.

Lilac’s actress, Emily Browning, is Australian. 

Chapter Twenty-Seven - in which the Baudelaires jump out a window 

Nick had placed Solitude onto the ground and now held Violet by the shoulders, shaking her slightly as he shouted. “What did they do to you, Vi? Vi, what did they do?”

Nick knows exactly what could have happened to Violet in captivity, so he’s completely and utterly panicked. 

“I’m with Klaus.” Nick said shakily. “We go together or not at all.”

A reference to the track “Together or Not at All” from Doctor Who, by Murray Gold. 

Chapter Twenty-Eight - in which the Baudelaires visit a Carnival 

No major references in this chapter. 

Chapter Twenty-Nine - in which Solitude finally morphs into a reptile 

“Well, if they…” Nick shut his eyes. “We just… better get there before they drink too much, that’s all.”

Nick has had experience with the troupe while drunk, and would rather attempt to speak with them before it goes too far. 

“Well, then,” Lulu said, stepping forwards and looking a bit confused, “What exactly are you, please?” “You can call me Babydoll.” Lilac said.

A very clear reference to the character that Emily Browning played in Sucker Punch (2011). 

Surprisingly, the henchpeople looked a little startled at that, as did Lulu, but Esme laughed. “Sounds like my kind of girl!” she said. “I drowned an ex once. So did you, dear, right?” Olaf was taking another swig of wine, so they couldn’t exactly see his reaction. 

Olaf “drowning an ex” is a reference to the Netflix show canon, where he left Georgina Orwell under a bridge to drown. 

His reaction being hidden is because, for obvious reasons, he doesn’t quite want to talk about murdered parents. 

“Well, I’m Elliot,” Klaus said, “And this is my other head, Janus.”

Janus was a Roman god with two faces. 

“And that down there,” Lilac said, pointing her thumb at Solitude, “Is our little pet gorgon. We call ‘er Euryale, cause her actual name is just a buncha hisses.”

Euryale was one of Medusa’s sisters in Greek Mythology. 

Chapter Thirty - in which the Baudelaires put on a show 

But as they started to leave, they heard a low rumble, and Nick immediately grabbed onto Klaus’s arm and let out a nervous gasp that was, thankfully, missed in the noise.

Nick recognizes the sound of Olaf’s car. 

Chapter Thirty-One - in which the Baudelaires play fortune teller 

“Or maybe,” Nick said, very quietly, keeping his eyes shut tight, “They were told not to find us.”

Nick learned a lot about VFD during his captivity, including their recruitment. He’s worried that their surviving parent may be ready to give them up to the organization. 

Nick grabbed a selection of paper, staring curiously, and then he quickly tried to shove it back, but Klaus’s eyes widened as he caught a glimpse of it, and he grabbed it from his brother. 

Nick, once again, sees the name “Snicket” and assumes the worst. 

Chapter Thirty-Two - in which the Baudelaires are asked to murder 

“No, thank you.” Esme said, looking down a Sunny and frowning. “I’m afraid I don’t like cinnamon in chocolate anymore, the woman who introduced it to me recently perished in a fire. But it’s very kind of you to offer.”

The Baudelaires received their taste for cinnamon in hot chocolate from their mother. 

“Sounds good.” Kevin said. “I’ve committed crimes before. Why, when I was no older than Elliot and Janus-” 

A reference to the theory that Kevin from ASOUE is the same as Kevin Old from File Under: 13 Suspicious Incidents, who committed vandalism and thievery. 

Chapter Thirty-Three - in which someone is pushed to the lions 

“I’m sure you are.” Olaf smirked, and he reached forwards and put a cold hand on Nick’s cheek. Nick tried very hard not to cry, but he wasn’t succeeding very well. “Now go jump into that pit. We want to see you devoured by lions.”

Olaf, who knows that the freaks are the Baudelaires, specifically picked Klaus and Nick to sacrifice to the lions specifically to torment Nick more; he knows what effect he has on him, and is relishing it. Once the boys are gone, they can grab the rest of the Baudelaires and escape. 

“I wish we had a cartographer with us.” Violet sighed. 

A reference to the next book, where Violet will have a relationship with Quigley, a cartographer. 

Chapter Thirty-Four / Epilogue - in which they should have said something

“Come on.” Bertrand said, taking Violet’s hands and spinning her as she giggled. “It’s Duke Ellington. That’s your fav, Li.”

A reference to All the Wrong Questions. 

“What song is this?” Violet asked. Beatrice smiled over at Soli, who was curled up on Nick’s lap, biting his sweater. “It’s got a very special name, isn’t that right, dear?” Solitude giggled. 

“Solitude”, by Duke Ellington, likely Ellington’s song in All the Wrong Questions. 

“Dashiell if it’s a boy,” Bertrand replied, “Sunny if it’s a girl.” 

“Dashiell” after Dashiell Qwerty from All the Wrong Questions. 

“We could adopt one of the outdoors animals.” Nick suggested. Beatrice and Bertrand turned to look at him. “The what?” Bertrand asked. “I keep hearing animals outside my window, every now and again.” Nick shrugged. “Howling or yipping or sometimes breaking a branch. Maybe if we brought them into the house, they wouldn’t get in so much trouble.” 

Recruitment attempts that have not been working, because Beatrice and Bertrand refuse to let their children join VFD. 

She turned to a selection of beach photos, slowly pulling out a small picture of baby Lilac, sitting on Briny Beach. It hadn’t been the first time she’d seen the ocean, but she’d still been so excited to splash in the water. 

Since Lilac was born eleven months before Violet, it’s likely she was born on the island. 

[texanredrose]

For the meme thingy: Her sister sounded nearly despondent. "They seem more friendly than romantic." Both interns shifted, their postures relaxing as always. They were so... comfortable around each other, and she didn't miss the way Yang got up and reached out towards Blake, contact between them a staple of every interaction. She bit her lip lightly for a moment, watching as whatever momentary unpleasantness they were discussing gave way to more laughter. "They've got to be fucking" Joint Venture

Lord, Joint Venture is an exercise in ‘you useless lesbians’ but also a fun way to show how making assumptions based on your experiences can be wildly misleading. Like- that’s Rom-Com 101, so no surprises there, but doing it in text format just allows for some great comedic timing, I think.

So, of course this full scene is Winter observing the way Blake and Yang interact with one another while talking to Weiss on the phone, which means you automatically have at least two sides to the story: the side of two (mostly) well adjusted adults who’ve been through some tough times and leaned on friends for support, the sort who’ve become comfortable around each other from long periods of exposure, and the sort of friends who intuitively know how to interact with each other that doesn’t necessarily need words in Blake and Yang, and then you’ve got the Schnee side, the rigorous and strict upbringing, the lack of platonic and familial affection, this weird sort of ‘normal’ they’ve forged for themselves amidst the wreckage of their home life in Weiss and Winter. 

Just from their respective backgrounds, there’s a clear difference in how they’re going to perceive boundaries- we’ve got Yang initiating contact and Blake letting her, and maybe Yang wouldn’t do that to just anyone and maybe Blake wouldn’t let just anyone do that, but the rest of the chapter kinda frames that yeah, Yang probably would, while Blake would be more selective, because even if they are best friends, there’s nuance to their experiences and how that’s shaped them as people- while Weiss and Winter keep people at arms’ length and hide their emotions as best they can- it’s not a video call, it’s not walking over to each other’s offices even though they’re clearly not getting any work done at the moment, it’s a phone call, because they interact best with the world when they have the most control over their communication, and what better way than hiding expressions and allowing only tone to convey emotions? 

But we also see a bit of a contradiction here, because they are being rather blunt and honest about how they’re feeling, and Weiss especially is allowing her emotions to be conveyed through her tone. Again, small differences in how they’re acting, with Winter allowing her word choice and pure bluntness to show her frustration with the situation while Weiss is more emotional and tending towards resignation. But, in the context of the scene, we also see how Weiss is hesitant to outright tell Winter that she’s wrong right off the bat- though she does in the next paragraph, when Winter plainly states her opinion. An opinion which also, technically, isn’t her telling Weiss she’s wrong. Although they hold two very distinct views on Blake and Yang’s relationship, they won’t argue to sway the other, whereas Blake and Yang are much more comfortable needling the other about their opinions, though not in an unkind way. I wanted to have this friction between Weiss and Winter, where they’re dancing around outright arguing with each other, because while I think they have the potential to be very good sisters- and friends, which sometimes gets skipped over in regards to familial relationships, in that your family should be your friends and supporters and vice versa- I think it’s important to highlight the ways where they’re not quite there yet in their interactions. They’re still learning to be open and honest with each other, but they’re still very cognizant of how that might come across and wary about being too honest, so fuck being that with other people, even though they do want to be more open, honest, and emotive- as we see them struggling to keep themselves in check when interacting with Blake and Yang solo. 

And letting Winter be crass and blunt as a way of showing her frustration with the situation just adds so much comedy when you’ve got Weiss being almost Shakespearean in her theatrics. You’ve got Weiss over here with a skull all ‘Alas, poor Sapphic heart of mine, woe is me’ and then Winter busting into the room like an angry Kool-Aid man like ‘OOOOOOOH THEY FUCKIN’ puts the whole breadth of Schnee familial dramatics in just a couple of lines- because, no doubt, Weiss has her moments like that while Winter can pull a Hamlet. They’re just rarely on the same wavelength and that’s part of the fun in this AU, just everyone being on a differently page- Blake and Yang/Weiss and Winter only slightly while they might as well be reading different books when compared against the object of their affections.

Another thing I wanted this part, specifically, to imply is that Weiss and Winter happened upon their attractions to Blake and Yang respectively in different ways. Weiss waxes poetic about Blake’s mannerisms and interests while Winter’s paying excessive attention to Yang’s body language and making a conclusion about their sexual relationship based off their physical- and innocuous- interactions. Sure, Winter goes on to acknowledge Yang’s mannerisms and how it’s all just pieces of the puzzle that she’s come to admire, but I did want this scene to sort of imply that, for Winter, it started with sexual attraction and evolved into a romantic interest while, for Weiss, it’s the other way around, bringing them both to the same point in their unrequited feelings, though through two different routes. As much as I do want Weiss and Winter to have a good, solid sibling relationship, I think it’s important to maintain that aspect of their interactions- that though they might have the same/similar aims, they’re going to attain them through their own paths and means.

So even though there’s some serious character introspection in this part, it’s still mostly amusing, because you, the reader, know the full story, and you can see how they’re being ridiculous talking the issue to death. It’s understandable, because of their positions, but also hilarious that they can all be so fucking wrong and not even realize it. Literally not one observation, no matter how blunt and certainly stated, is actually correct, but they’re all so damn certain of themselves, it’s great.

[protegoparacosm]

Miraculous Class Headcanons

*walks into Collège Françoise Dupont fifty minutes late with Starbucks* What up I made the Buzzfeed Unsolved AU, it’s 1 AM, and I can’t seem to fucking sleep so have some class headcanons of highest shitpost quality.

Tagging @miraculous-lbcn cause hi you wanted this.

Hey batta batta swing Adrien Agreste is a fucking little shit

Like yea he’s the nicest guy ever and shit but if he’s in a class with a teacher he hates he is a sass bomb in a chair

He mutters comments under his breath that only Alya, Nino, and Marinette hear and they lose their shit every goddamn time

Teacher: Okay guys if everyone jumped off a bridge would you too?

Adrien: *under his breath* As long as I got to take you with, you bitch fucking choke on a dick

WOW WE GOT THREE HYENAS IN THE ROOM CALL THE ZOO (I’m referring to Alya, Nino, and Marinette dying of laughter there are not actual hyenas in the classroom)

Once Marinette was almost so late

Keyword here is almost

She ran to school only to see Madame Bustier walking through the front doors

Madame Bustier saw Marinette and gave her a “you’re late” look and walked into the school

This girl basically said FUCK IT and CLIMBED THE DAMN SCHOOL IN CIVILIAN FORM LIKE MARINETTE WHAT THE FUCK

She climbed to the window of her class which was on the second floor and knocked wildly, scaring Chloe out of her seat

Needless to say Alya was shook

Her best friend was outside a damn second floor window with a frantic look

Adrien gave her a thumbs up cause wow she’s outside the window fucking rad she ain’t no bitch

Kim was the real MVP and he let her in

Madame Bustier walked in and froze at the sight of Marinette

“WHAT- HOW- WHAT?!” -Madame Bustier upon realizing she was bamboozled

Juleka and Rose have a specific day where they walk into class with their pajamas on and they sleep all day

At first it was a bit confusing to everyone else but now it’s the most casual thing

Goals honestly

Nino is the oven of the class

Roasts everyone

“Chloe, I didn’t know you were going to clown tryouts with all that makeup on”

Ivan: You’re gonna need some ice for that

Meme king Kim

As a prank he stapled pictures of memes onto the walls

It was mainly Kermit memes

Responds to questions in meme format

He once looked at his test and everyone just heard a faint and dejected “cries in Spanish”

Mylene and Nathanael made a bet on who makes the first move: Adrien or Marinette

So far Mylene has 50 euros riding on Adrien

Chloe and Sabrina are fucking cheaters

They always sneak the test answers

Either that or they copy off someone

Adrien Agreste Protection Squad is the entire class

There are shirts

And hats

They protect Adrien from people who want his autograph and the bloodthirsty fangirls my god they’re like zombies

“Back you demons” -Juleka about fangirls wanting autographs

It is class law to never give Marinette coffee

Adrien walked into class with a cup of coffee and saw Marinette tired as fuck and about to fall asleep

Being the nice guy he is he gave Marinette the entire cup of coffee with a smile

He thought he was helping

He wasn’t

He awakened the kraken that is coffee high Marinette

That girl would not sit still and would just scream cause she thought of stupid questions that fucked with the mind

Alya: *after Marinette screamed* GIRL WHAT THE HELL!?

Marinette: Do you think crabs think fish can fly?

That was just hour one

Her personality changes every hour

Hour two: She sings musicals in the courtyard

Specifically Anastasia

“HAIL OUR BRAVE NEW LAND! SAINT PETERSBURG IS GLOOMY, A CITY ON THE RISE!”

Hour three: Running. Just running

Hour four: Crying for no apparent reason

Hour five: Out like a goddamn light in the middle of the hallway like you think she’s dead and everyone is sharpening their pencils, ready to shank Adrien

She doesn’t remember anything the next day

Nino once ordered a pizza in the middle of class

He shared it with Adrien cause it was a whole fucking pizza

Okay but this variation of the first few bulletpoints also happened

Teacher: If everyone jumped off a bridge would you do it too?

Adrien, loudly: Yes because there would be a pile of dead bodies to land on

*Everyone stares at Adrien like he’s a psychopath*

Marinette and Adrien are the closet emos

Everyone knew it

Ivan played Welcome To The Black Parade and those two started sobbing

They ended up sobbing in the back corner of the class with a shock blanket over them