#can u imagine they invented cursed love they really did

[clockwork-carstairs]

julian and emma are so “a one in a million chance is still a chance” coded i’m on my KNEES. they really invented star-crossed lovers

[hirvitank]

Waste + 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 9, 11, 12, 13, 15

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

I knew Death of the Outsider was coming, and as the Outsider was my favourite character I really wanted to explore the theory of him becoming human—the game hadn’t been released yet so we had no idea how it’d actually end, just that Billie and Daud were working together to kill him. Since the Outsider functioned as a sort of moral compass, I was very curious to try and imagine how his canon characteristics and biases would translate into a human version of him; how would he experience the world? How would he come to terms with such a humbling existence? Where did he come from and who was he? How would he cope with his own mortality, human emotion, the consequences following his choices in the Void? And most importantly; how had his being the Outsider affected his humanity? There was so much I wanted to see explored, things I feel the previous games hinted at but never elaborated upon. I wanted to write a psychological sort of story where we’d really be able to feel and experience whatever passed in his mind, and I tried my best to use my knowledge as well as my own experiences—flaws I either observed within myself or others, ideas, thoughts and feelings influenced by bias, depression, trauma, etc. When in art school, most of my inspiration came from the transience of things; my fear of death. I really wanted to take the subject and explore it through the eyes of someone previously immortal.

2: What scene did you first put down?

I think it was the original ending I wrote down first. I was supposed to write towards a particular scene, but somewhere along the way I’d decided to discard the idea entirely and opt for a happier resolution. I originally intended for the Outsider to die in the end, both to explore the feelings of those around him, as well as his own emotions accepting such a fate. I wanted a way to embrace death, as well as an output for all my bitterness regarding the subject; my anger at the ‘unfairness’ of it all, as well as my own trauma. I wanted to express loss, and in a way try and reveal the beauty of it. In the end, I had already found a way to deal with grief, and I also felt these characters deserved more; the fairness of fiction

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

That’s a REALLY difficult pick haha (does this mean literally a single line, or like a paragraph?). I’ll just share one of my favourite parts, because I can, and because it’s even more difficult to pick a single line from such a long story and I’m honestly horrible at making choices:

I heard the whispers of rats all around me, tiny feet scampering through the pipes; Billie’s gift tucked inside my shirt. My bare feet light, making little noise—as if I wasn’t really there. Perhaps I wasn’t. Perhaps I hadn’t been anywhere for centuries.

Up the stairs, cold stones. The walls decorated, grand and lavish. Empty corridors and lingering traces of hushed whispers—the guards had left their posts. She’d be there. How would that have made me feel? How should that make me feel? Almost, getting closer. My heart pounded in my ears, lungs greedily begging for more air, more—more. I felt like running. Strong currents of energy coursed through my veins, vibrated through bones and tendons. If I lost control, would I explode in a million pieces? Would the energy burst out and take my body apart, like the Void tearing into reality?

Who was I?

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

Honestly impossible to pick, I’ll just take this monologue:

“Anton Sokolov: sire to 14 children, but a father to none. A brilliant mind at a terrible cost, enlightenment in exchange for the dark depravity of the soul. Fingers that turn the times into a revolution of progress, the same fingers that touch upon women as they do the cold inventions they craft. Objects close to his heart—objects from his mind.

“The stench of alcohol in his bed, his clothes, his skin. Liquors and paints; on the canvas, dripping from his fingers, in the eyes of the beggar he found in the flooded slums of a place forsaken. The stench of rot still fresh on his teeth as he smiles at young Emily Kaldwin and tells her: ‘Don’t worry dear, here in the tower you are safe.’ Don’t worry dear, for I know the truest evil lies not within the high walls of Dunwall but within my hands and mind, within the flooded basement where a woman screamed and bled until she hung her head and closed eyes from which the dark paint still leaked—forever.

“The human body—like clockwork—taken apart in exchange for coin, for valuables. But those things Anton Sokolov values most lay outside of his intellectual grasp; for all the reasoning in the world he is but a cold, lonely man in search of a higher purpose that is but a lie of his own twisted imagination. A delusion of grandeur.

“How does it feel? One’s biggest regrets are but feelings of little consequence. The true disease is the sickness that allows one to enact true consequence on an innocent in the name of a self-prescribed fate. But I suppose that’s the curse of boredom. That, is the curse of your brilliance.”

5: What part was hardest to write?

The first chapter! There’s nothing more difficult than a set-up imo; establishing characters, pacing, setting and feel. I had a vague idea of where I wanted to go, but there was still so much I didn’t know that I had a hard time choosing how and where to start. I think it’s one of the most heavily edited chapters, just because I didn’t have a clear grasp on the characters or plot yet. (Also smut, oh lord help me)

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

There’s the original ending, and I did at one point start on a companion fic to explore Emily’s pov, but decided I better focus on finishing the original instead.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

The fact that it’s finished (hurrahhhh!!), and the themes and subjects.

12: What do you like least about this fic?

My own sense of humour, I always cringe reading my own jokes so I can only hope it hits with others—I genuinely have no idea, and it’s hard at times to figure out where to draw the line.

13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

WELL IM GLAD U ASKED!! I’ll try and keep this short, but these are some of the songs that carried this fic, not even exaggerating.

1. Lover Don’t Leave, Citizen Shade

2. Happy Life, Roland Faunte

3. Painting Roses, Dresses

4. ID, Charlie Allen

5. High Tops, Del Water Gap

6. Love Song for Lady Earth, Del Water Gap

7. Battle Cry, The Family Crest

15: What did you learn from writing this fic?

EVERYTHING. I had literally no idea about writing, apparently. I’ve had no classes in literature, nor have I ever been taught the common rules when it comes to writing. I got to learn most of it thanks to my friends who helped edit (shoutout to @onewhoturns again), and through trial and error. I absolutely loved the experience of it, and I’m so grateful for all I’ve learned, and all I will continue to learn in the future. It’s given me the basis for my own original writing which I’m trying to pursue, and which I hope will someday become reality.

Thank you so much for these! I’ve thoroughly enjoyed answering every single one. ♥

[fangirlyah]

✦just an arrangement - Draco Malfoy x Reader (part 2)

summary: the return to the school year with the dark mark is hard enough, but now they must fulfill a more intimate request or they expect a happily ever after with an old death eater.

warnings: cursing and mentions of sex

word count: 2,383

a/n: hey! i think i will do at least 2 more parts to this story but idk so tell me what u think :) 

another thing, i imagine y/n with this dress: https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/623185667178835548/?nic_v2=1a1Y1Zk4c but you can imagine her with any dress, suit or whatever you feel most comfortable with 

that sunny morning, draco had received a letter from his mother.

my dearest draco, 

severus informed us about your relationship with the girl y/l. I am surprised that you didn't tell me sooner, according to your teacher your relationship is now three months old. your father is delighted with the news, so he wants to have you both this weekend to present you as an official couple. y/n's parents will surely inform her about it. 

we look forward to seeing you. 

much love.

your mother

when he had gone down to the slytherin common room and saw her sitting down, he assumed that she had already received the news. 

"magnolia brought my letter too, we are expected this friday for dinner" y/n explained mentioning her beloved owl.

"are you ready?" draco took a seat on an individual sofa in the living room, which was opposite hers. 

"i'm not going to lie to you and say yes" this was their first talk like that. it was the first time they spoke from heart to heart about the subject that united them so much, the darkness that surrounded them. 

when draco wanted to answer her, some first year children entered the common room and looked at them. they could not continue talking about the subject so y/n got up from her place to continue with their performance. 

"see you in the great hall, darling" leaving draco in shock, she placed a kiss on his forehead and went to the exit of the place. 

he sat on the couch for what he thought had been hours. still feeling her soft lips on his forehead and her sweet voice calling out a lovely nickname. unknowingly they felt the same, both trying to push out those feelings that fluttered in their stomachs whenever they were near.

that wednesday, the day they received the news, y/n was taken by her mother to hogsmeade in search of a stylish dress. having such intimidating and influential parents had its benefits as being able to leave to hogsmeade just to look for a dress in the middle of a typical morning. 

"looking for your little girlfriend, malfoy?!” one of the weasley twins shouted as they watched the blond boy look for his 'girlfriend' in the chaos of the great hall. draco only gave them a determined look, saying that he would only lend them his attention for a few seconds. "her mother came to look for her this morning and she hasn't yet returned" 

draco and y/n had spent their mornings apart and lunch was the time where they should make a daily show of affection. they had never reached the point of kissing but they knew that they should do so, in the way not to arouse suspicion. 

draco did not want to feel worried but the mention of y/n’s mother made him alert. when he was about to violently ask the twins how they had this information he saw her enter the room with a smile, which he thought was probably fake. 

he saw her walk the long way to him greeting many people giving them warm smiles and looks. for a moment he wished he was her and so that people would like him. 

 "hello, draco” the smile that involuntarily came out on his face was bigger than he would have liked. 

she was so close that he smelled her perfume and saw the sparkles in her eyes in the light. without knowing where so much courage came from, draco approached her face with the intention of kissing her lips briefly and giving their audience, that were staring at them, what they wanted. but she discreetly refused his offer of a kiss and allowed his lips to reach her cheek; despite the failed attempt, both blushed and y/n gave him a look that he could not decipher.

"where were you?” his long white hand took hers to sit on the table and start eating lunch, side by side. 

"mum took me to buy a dress, according to her your tie will be the same colour" 

"aww your first official couple's dinner! i want to see your dress y/n! where do you have it?" astoria was a causeless romantic, so she was always attentive to what they were doing or not. 

"it's in my dorm, i'll show it to you later” draco knew that astoria had something up her sleeve, because of the way she looked at y/n and how attentive her movements were; maybe it was jealousy, his parents had informed him that one of his suitors was astoria greengrass and that if he didn't find a girlfriend on his own, she would be an option as a future wife; maybe astoria's parents had already told her that too. 

the remaining days to dinner, passed in the blink of an eye. so when they least noticed, y/n was coming down from her dorm knowing that draco was waiting for her in the common room, ready to disparate and head for the malfoy mansion. 

he was standing leaning his back on an armchair, his hair perfectly combed and clean with an immaculate suit that made him look mature and handsome. his tie was the exact same colour as the dress that adorned y/n's body. 

she came down the stairs with an elegance that she wore in her day to day life even though she was not wearing such fine clothes. when draco saw her his heart turned as he was grateful that he was bringing home such a beautiful companion. 

"hello draco" y/n greeted him cordially when she reached his side, he seemed bewitched and although he tried to hide it she noticed and was happy to see that she was not the only one impressed. 

he said, "are you ready?" gently his hand approached hers, to take her and travel by magic to his home. 

"you don't want to know the answer" 

despite being in high shoes, y/n landed on the manor door as if it were nothing. the big black door was not a very cheerful welcome, but both knew they had to enter with the best of faces. 

and so they did. draco took the initiative and entangled his arm with y/n’s to start their performance. 

as soon as they entered the house a wave of people looked at them; many more than they expected. their parents had told them that the guests would not exceed fifteen people but in front of them were at least thirty wizards and witches. 

"well hello to our guests of honor!” bellatrix made her way through the crowd to greet her nephew and the pretty girl who accompanied him. 

draco’s nerves were too noticeable so y/n, and her theatrical skills, had to take the lead.   

"good night everyone..." there were many pairs of eyes on them, all quietly waiting for the couple to debut the night "you all look very elegant...emm thank you for receiving us on such a beautiful night" 

y/n parents were looking at her proudly from the other side of the room. both they and the malfoy were swallowing the farce like a shot of imported whiskey, worshipping the new alliance; their children's relationship guaranteed wealth and power to both families. 

"say something, draco" y/n whispered, keeping her eyes and smile up high. 

"thank you so much for the great organization and preparation, we appreciate it" with that said, each guest seemed to agree and continued their previous conversation. 

they were all adults except blaise zabini and the greengrass sisters. draco thought that seeing people his age would calm his nerves but it did not. 

they all exuded airs of wealth and elegance as they spoke and drank such expensive drinks. y/n thought that by collecting all the money from food and drink she could help the weasleys build that new room that molly wanted as a knitting workshop. 

draco and y/n moved among the guests, still with their arms intertwined, to meet their parents in front of one of the tables with gourmet snacks that surely had taken the elves hours to make.

"welcome draco and y/n" lucius was the first to speak when he had the teenagers in front of him. 

“you two look so beautiful together!” y/m/n watched how their clothes matched and was proud to have insisted y/n to wear that dress. 

“we are all amazingly happy for the two of you" it was really striking how well they looked together, side by side pretending to be a couple that they were not. 

"may i ask, how did this happen?" a newcomer bellatrix asked them with a questioning look.

the nerves of both of them grew, as they had not organised any pre-dinner stories to tell and leave people satisfied.

"emm...we used to meet a lot in the library and one day draco came over, we started chatting, and that's how we fell in love" draco had to swallow so hard that his throat hurt. her voice had sounded so convincing, that he was overwhelmed to hear that they were in love. he didn't know how y/n had managed to sound so real and at the same time invent on the fly; he didn't know much about her childhood but assumed she had developed that skill at that stage of her life. 

"we want to know all the details!" astoria greengrass took y/n’s arm to get her off draco's side faster than light. 

people were eating and drinking as if there was no tomorrow, while they were questioning the recent couple who had been separated by the living room for an hour. 

in spite of the distances, draco and y/n looked at each other constantly; y/n thought it was to continue their pretense of teenagers enjoying love, but draco could not take his eyes off the girl, with that dress decorating her body as if it had been handmade for her. 

y/n had heard questions from how many children they planned to have, when they planned to get married, to whether or not he kissed with his tongue a question she questioned herself

draco, for his part, had been shot with questions from how they had met to whether she was good in bed or not; he had not needed to act angry when he heard the question, he was angry without the need to act. 

until his aunt reappeared. 

"dear nephew, how has the night been treating you?" 

"very well, aunt. how about you?” blaise had quickly disappeared when he saw bellatrix make an appearance; what a pussy, draco thought.

"oh great, i’ve been chatting with y/n for a while ...how did you meet again?" 

"emm...in the library a few months ago" he knew that his aunt did not believe that they were a couple. at that time, draco begged merlin to please make y/n appeared at his side and help him with his lack of skills in what pretending in front of death eaters was all about. but she was talking kindly to a woman, who seemed to be watching her so closely that in the muggle world y/n could have been x-rayed. the girl was not easy to read, she pretended so well, that if she was uncomfortable or upset it was difficult for draco to find out. as bellatrix continued to talk to him he wondered if any of her friends could read her to the point of acknowledging her discomfort 

"I thought you already knew each other, you know the y/l and the malfoys are families who hang around each other a lot" her voice was analytical as if she was waiting for draco to break character and spit out the truth. 

"in the library we really met, just y/n and draco not y/l and malfoy" draco knew that if y/n had heard him at that moment, she would be proud. 

"do you plan on having kids?” draco had a moment of lucidity and recognised that it was probably one of the questions his 'girlfriend' had been bombarded with; it was almost impossible that his aunt would been asking him about future children, she hated them. he did not know what y/n’s answer had been, so when he saw her alone he apologised gently and approached her, quickly but without looking desperate. 

y/n was pouring some pumpkin juice into her long glass when the blonde appeared beside her. 

"you would not know the amount of nonsense i have been asked, people really are gossi-" 

"kiss me" he whispered, causing her to leave her glass on the table confused.

"excuse me...what?"  

"my aunt is suspicious, do it now" 

it was strange, her first kiss was going to be with a boy who pretended to love her. y/n had imagined this moment completely different, but there was no choice. 

so when draco took her cheeks and kissed her sweetly as if she could break at any moment she let herself go with it. she rested her hands on his chest and let draco move his lips over hers; he had to erase any doubt that someone at the party might have, not make a scene; so they parted away after a few seconds. 

it had definitely not been as y/n expected; because she had loved it and wanted more. but when she saw that draco turned his head in search of some distrustful look, she wanted to run to the guest bedroom and curl up to cry. y/n remembered that it was all a farce, something she had forgotten the instant his lips touched hers. 

she didn't know that draco had turned his head so that she wouldn't have seen him blushed. he thought that the tickling on his lips and the bubbles in his belly were visible to her, because they felt so strong that his brain seemed to get dizzy. 

"good job" what? good job? what was that? she hadn't finished a herbology essay, why did he say that? draco wanted to punch himself, he had been an idiot. 

y/n was about to say something random to avoid awkwardness, but her mother called from afar so that she could introduce herself to some newly arrived adults; and she left, leaving draco with a shy smile that he was too confused to answer. 

what did he feel in his stomach?

[antialiasis]

Dave and His Memories Discuss Mia (and Jean)

Back in 2007, when I was writing The Fall of a Leader for NaNo, there was one particular chapter that stuck out. In it, Shadowdart sat down contemplating the roots of his moral system. While I was writing this particular chapter, for whatever reason, I got so intensely into his head that I genuinely felt like I was discovering something legitimately profound and important. By the time I was editing the story in January and got to that part again, it felt pretty unremarkable as a chapter. But the experience of writing it had been something unique. I’d never really felt like that writing before, and never felt it again... until this Saturday, that is.

It's a bit of a long story how that happened. For the past few months I've been participating in the Blacklight RPG on Thousand Roads, as Dave from Morphic, only as a Poochyena (because this is a PMD RP, where any participating humans are turned into Pokémon). Without getting into too much in the way of explanations, the other day on spur of the moment @unrepentantauthor and I started to privately roleplay an imagined interaction between Poochyena Dave and their character's father, a Delphox named Jesse Stranger, where they argue about which of them is less of a terrible father and are both being giant hypocrites going "NO U" at each other and it's great.

Anyway, at a certain point in the argument Jesse the Delphox uses Miracle Eye to mind-probe Dave about whether he's ever had 'violent thoughts' about his kids, and I sat down to write what he'd find. And it happened again! I spent three hours so in his head that I was full-on crying about his feelings and was shaking afterwards and everything. Like thirteen years ago, reading over it again afterwards it's like okay, this is not all that remarkable. But since this stands largely on its own and doesn't require any background knowledge of the RP, here it is anyway, for anyone interested in Morphic extras.

The formatting here is a bit unusual; I originally used Discord spoilers for some of the thoughts in the memories that he refuses to consciously acknowledge, the stuff that wouldn't show up in the narration of his POV of these scenes but is there anyway for a psychic to pick up on. Since Tumblr can't do those, I've replaced them with strikethroughs, which is not quite the same effect, but oh well.

What... what was he doing. Dave's ears flattened back against his head. Miracle Eye? What was that? Was he supposed to have any fucking idea what--

Everything fell in on itself, the Delphox's mind pressing against his own, finding faults, piercing them. He yelled out a panicked string of curses he couldn't hear. Fuck, fuck, what was happening--

--and then, suddenly, a memory. The echoing slam of a door, the unbearable screeching cry of an infant in his arms. she was gone, for good this time, and he knew it, fuck, he fucked it up every time, of course he fucking did Blinking rapidly and standing there and listening to the fucking interminable howls of this freak he never wanted and was somehow stuck with, thanks to these clownish fucking abortion activists. because he'd gotten drunk and fucking bragged about it at a bar, what the fuck was wrong with him A fleeting, angry thought as he looked at the baby, this flailing little bundle: Maybe Jane had the right idea. The mental image of just grabbing her by the ankle and tossing her off the balcony, watching her sail over the trees as the wailing receded into the night, or even just slamming her into the wall, a crack followed by heavenly silence. he didn't want this, he didn't want this, how was he supposed to take care of a fucking baby alone, he couldn't do this, fuck, maybe the police wouldn't even care when the baby wasn't fucking human, or he could just jump after her and get it over with--

His stomach clenched in revulsion, nausea crawling up his throat. What the fuck was this? He barely even remembered that night, hadn't thought of it in fucking years. He wanted to reach out and tear Jean away from this creep, just hold her and keep her safe and make sure nobody could hurt her, ever. Fuck, he just wanted to go home.

--and then a sudden unexpected yank into a series of other memories. Mia, four years old, no idea why she shouldn't hurt people; the abstract realization she was disturbed, weird, but also fascinating. She wasn't a monster; she was just different. Smart. She could figure it out, if he just explained in the right way if he failed that was a problem for later--

--watching the new game Mia and Lucy had invented for the first time a year later, the predatory glint in Mia's eyes as she pounced: it's a game, honestly it's just pretty cute, it's just the same as the little violent impulses they all have this might be more concerning when she has scythes but it's nothing to worry about--

--Mia, seven years old, little scythes beginning to poke out of her arms. Feeling almost giddy analyzing the X-rays: he'd been right, they were growing exactly as he'd predicted. Cheryl taking him aside, asking if she should be worried. No, of course not, she won't do anything, Lucy can stay insubstantial what if -- she won't, she's brilliant, she gets it--

--getting a call from the school, about how Mia, nine, had swiped and cut a girl's hair. Showing up to the principal's office, trying to placate the horrified parents. "She could've killed her!" "Of course she wouldn't have. She knows her own limits. It was just a game, like the games she plays with her sister. We'll talk to her about why she can't do that and that'll be the end of it." the hair's very close to the neck, fuck, Mia, what--

--looking at her in his car one day after one of their weird talks to offer her hotdogs, only to find her staring at him in the sort of way she stared at Lucy during their games, and when he asked what she was thinking she said she was hungry. "Just so we're clear here, when you say 'hungry' you mean 'let's get hotdogs', not 'I want to tear Dave's throat out and eat him', right?" "Both." Fear congealing in his stomach, blood running cold in his veins. She wasn't actually going to, and he knew it -- she was annoyed to even have to explain: "I like talking to you more than I'd like eating you." "That's great, but you can't eat people you don't like either." "I know." "Tell me why." -- but in his mind's eye he saw her lashing out, scythe through his throat, her sharpened fangs tearing at his windpipe, and felt so sick he couldn't breathe. Telling her to please not let him down please before exiting the car, extending his hand towards her and imagining her lunging again and every primal instinct in his brain telling him to get away, but no, she wouldn't, he knew that, and instead holding his hand firm until she took it if she attacked it'd be on him anyway--

--another call. She'd attacked a boy, put a pretty deep cut in his arm. His heart pounding in the office. Mia please don't fucking do this Somehow persuading the principal and the parents that it's a matter of childish impulse control, it's not like she wants to hurt anyone, she knows she shouldn't, they were thinking about making some sheaths for her scythes anyway kind of, maybe, he'd thought about it once and once that happened it wouldn't be a problem. Asking her about it in the car afterwards. Apparently it was this group of kids that kept harassing her about religion, of course it all came down to fucking religion, and she was just defending herself. Like she didn't have that fucking right -- but they talked about it anyway and it'd be fine and they'd make the sheaths Mia please--

--a pang of dread every time he got a call for a while, until at last the third one, when it was clear the principal had already made up his mind when he arrived at the office, and he argued fiercely anyway, they were provoking her, who even does that -- but then she expertly executed a fly on the wall and he couldn't even disagree anymore, she was probably better off homeschooled, and he took her home and they talked about religion on the way and he was glad he'd not have to get any more of these fucking phone calls, and then even fucking Howard was acting like it was all her fucking fault but it wasn't, she wasn't a monster, she was just Mia and she was weird but she was a fucking person and she was his best friend, taking her for hotdogs was like the best part of his week, he couldn't fucking lose her and it wasn't her fault, he'd made her this way and he'd figure it out--

--that horrible day of waking up to all of them gone but Lucy, off on a fucking suicide mission to rescue Gabriel, begging Jean to come home, realizing he'd fucking told them about the trap laid out for them, pacing around the house drinking whatever he could get his hands on trying to imagine they'd all be all right only all he could think was that they were all dying and he should go out there and do something except there was nothing he could do, he'd just be getting himself killed, and fuck, that was fine, fucking bring it, but they'd kill Gabriel too. The utilitarian calculus that rationally they should have just let them kill Gabriel so nobody else would die, they'd all fucking hate him forever but at least they'd be okay, but even then he just fucking couldn't, he was pretty sure Gabriel hated him already but Dave's heart still sank into a bottomless pit at the thought, and all he could do was cling to the fantasy that somehow everyone would be okay and try to drink enough to not remember the rest it'd be his fault, his fucking fault, he told them where to go--

--learning, from Jack's strained recollection of that day, that Mia had died with some kind of psycho fucking grin on her face after slitting somebody's throat, and feeling sick and pressing his lips together as he sat there, but it wasn't her fault, it wasn't her fault, it wasn't her fault, she was fucking unique and he loved her and if they hadn't shot her three times in the head he'd be fucking taking her and driving off, getting her out of the country, he didn't care, they couldn't take Mia he'd made her that way and he hadn't said the right things to her and he'd fucking told them where to go like a fucking idiot--

See, Dave thought, fiercely, in the middle of it, she wasn't a fucking monster, I never thought she was a fucking monster, all I ever wanted was to keep her fucking safe.

[fwoopersongs]

何必诗债换酒钱 - Notes

Clean version here and thoughts under the cut.

I saw the song translation notes made by @shelterfromrain​ a while back and thought, wow! what a fantastic idea it is to share the results of the rabbit holing (that you inevitably end up engaging in when doing this) and leave a record for your future self while at it too! Currently some of the song and poetry translations on fwoopersongs do have little notes, but those were casually written on the fly and after so long, the thought process behind certain choices often get forgotten, which is such a waste... Long story short - I’m doing it this way from now on!

This song was requested by @peerlesssqq on twitter - which may or may not have bumped it up by like a year on my list (yes, I’ve been sitting on it since 2018 and you’ll see why) - and I had WAY more fun than expected, so 谢啦 ~ It was a delight to receive your DM request. I was happy for days!

Some background: 《何必诗债换酒钱》 is the theme song of 【文定乾坤】- a collection of musical works that feature notable contributors to Chinese literature in ancient times, poets and the like. Oh, and I did notice that the MV on bilibili looks like it could be a promo for a webtoon or game. Who knows? I’ll be checking out the rest of the songs, that’s for sure!

The following part of this post will be my thoughts for first the title, then each section - the intro, verse 1 & 2 and the chorus, ending off with some final comments.

Disclaimer first though (otherwise later you read already then feel like beating me up): Everything in this post is only my interpretation of the song. I have quite limited familiarity with mainland literature and culture, so of course don’t expect much xD Here you’ll only find a story-loving banana who jiak-ed kantang too much in her youth and now regrets it a whole lot. 说好了哈 I’m pants at analysis, worse at Chinese, and am not at all good with words ok?

Title

So《何必诗债换酒钱》, let’s start off with the word here that’s unfamiliar to most of us:

诗债 | shī zhài or a debt of poems/poetry debt is a legit thing! - All you authors and artists out there might be familiar with it - It’s what you call the resulting debt when a poet promises to write something for another person but hasn’t done it yet. Procrastination has apparently always been the curse of content creators.

In fact, in the Bai Juyi’s poem that came up on the 诗债 baidu page《晚春欲携酒寻沉四著作先以六韵寄之》- possibly addressed to a friend he owes - he was complaining of illness, old age and writer’s block. But then oh, he goes on and then I passed by a party where they had drinks, and was quite up to my gills & totally out of it for some time, and THAT’S why I’ve done you dirty and owe you ever so many poems. I don’t really understand the last two lines but apparently he then offers to bring a drink for this person he’s talking to, mentions a wish to meet a winter goddess (????? pretty girl? or the snow? idk which), and starts reminiscing the times that were like a precious string of pearls they had singing at Yang Pass. Most likely farewells, but without context I just don’t get it. Anyway bribery and misdirection huh? I see what you did there bro, and I’m sure the person you attempted to distract saw it coming too...

何必 | hé bì, is a rhetorical question of Must you really? In the case of this word, 何 functions as roughly ‘is it that’ and 必 as ‘it must be so’.

换酒钱 | huàn jiǔ qián is of course, exchange for money to purchase wine.

‘Must you really promise poems in exchange for money to buy wine?’ then is the literal translation of 何必诗债换酒钱.

So here is the question: Is alcohol worth a poetry debt? Onwards to the answer!

Intro

生就诗骨 算来三百篇  Born and already a poet to the bones, (with) three hundred works counting up to now. 

浪掷秦淮长安 风流李杜王白  Spending lavishly in Qinhuai and Chang’an, free/unrestrained as Li and Du, Wang and Bai;

余下十分 便随意肩上担  whatever left is divided in ten parts, casually thrown over a shoulder

权作金玉铜板 相谢好人间  and taken for jade, gold and coin, a big thank you to this good world!

I interpreted the 生 in the first line as 天生 i.e. innate, natural born talent, so this first line describes someone born with a gift for poetry with ‘three hundred’ works to their name. Although... that three hundred should not be taken too literally, it’s more likely to be an allusion to collected works like the 16th century anthology of poems, Three Hundred Tang Poems. After all, Li Bai, Du Fu, Wang Wei and Bai Juyi are the most famous Tang Dynasty poets… and they were all name-dropped in the next line!

浪掷 | làng zhì was a new phrase for me, and means something like spending freely and lavishly or willfully wasted. Of course Chang’an was the capital during the Tang Dynasty and it was the world's most populous city at the time. One can only imagine how prosperous it must have been… and what fun things were there to spend your money on! The banks of Qinhuai river and that general area was once a gathering place for noble/wealthy families, scholars looking for a good time (and some say, the red light district xD). Though by Sui/Tang, that area was no longer doing as well due to political shifts. So the mental image I got from 浪掷秦淮长安 is of someone gallivanting through places of interest, from the bustling and prosperous to the dilapidated.

风流 | fēng liú is as always, hard to translate with no full equivalent in english. The feel it gives me ranges from, ‘cool, dashing bloke on a galloping horse with their cloak/robes/hair flowing elegantly in the wind’ to ‘pleasure seeking dandy who totally knows how to enjoy life, all the courtesans know him by courtesy name!’.

The third line started with 余下十分, which will not make any sense - why leftover? Divide what by ten? - until its put in context with the following:

Three hundred poems 算来三百篇 + 权作金玉铜板 pretend they are gold/jade/money (权作 | quán zuò just means to take one thing for another temporarily.)

The load thrown over the shoulder 肩上担

Spendthrift behaviour on tour 浪掷秦淮长安

The TITLE: bro so u wanna promise poetry in exchange for money to drink? why.

Let’s take those precious poems that can be exchanged for gold - a whole bagful of scrolls, and now I’m so rich I can scatter my money down the streets of entertainment districts and the capital! The very image of a 风流 poet, reckless and free spirited.

// Folks, please learn from this silly girl and do not read songs (or poems) line by line. They need to be appreciated at a distance, not one inch from your eyeballs.

Verse 1

两分与月 劳烦身前打点 Two parts to the moon, (may I) trouble you to take care of me while I’m alive.

哪处巍峨峰峦 当借我悬来观 Wherever there are majestic peaks and ranges, do lend me (your light) to hang and see by.

三分典高楼 好与长风赴宴 Three parts pawned for the tall building, good for attending the banquet alongside the wind,

遍寻可爱星子 唾手一把玩 searching for charming little stars, easily caught to play with.

Now we get to see how the poet is spending his ‘wealth’. This verse is a lot more literal as compared to the introduction, so there’s not much to say.

打点 used here is so interesting! Because it’s what you call bribing someone in a superior position to smoothen your path ahead (so to speak). Thanks to a childhood of tvb drama, I vaguely associate the type of people who would 打点 with rich merchant or minor noble fathers who want to give their sons an easier time at court. Either that or lower ranked officials with less moral scruples. Anyway, what’s being said in the song is something like: here is 20% dear moon, I’ll have to trouble you to bless me for the rest of this lifetime, and also please lend me your light to see by when I have need of it at scenic spots *for art*. The moon is a muse for many poets in all its forms after all… 明月, 圆月, 孤月, 残月, 冷月, 江月, 秋月 and so on.

Actually that whole sentence 劳烦身前打点 is so playful and fun that I put it in quotation marks to emphasize it. We’ve only just begun. Is the speaker already drunk?

And with the third line, 30% has been spent. Just noting here that 典 | diǎn can be read as pawn or mortgage. Another interesting thing to note would be that this imagery of ascending a tall building 高楼 and reaching out for stars 星子 in the last two lines of Verse 1 brings to mind one particular poem, famously attributed to Li Bai. Following translation by yours truly.

《夜宿山寺》- Overnight at the Mountain Temple 危楼高百尺 | dangerously towering a hundred feet high 手可摘星辰 | the stars are within reach 不敢高声语 | one dares not raise their voice 恐惊天上人 | for fear of disturbing the deities

Though the two probably have nothing to do with each other, doesn’t the reverence in the tone of this one bring out the playful irreverence of the other? So. Much. Fun. I adore the whole feel of 遍寻可爱星子 唾手一把玩 SO MUCH.

Verse 2

两分与桥 歇脚南北行船 Two parts to the bridge where travellers on foot and by boat from the north and south can rest,

欣然八方风物 闲话半日茶碗 delighted by the scenery all around, idly chatting half the day away over bowls of tea.

三分典流水 润色枯瘦石山 Three parts for the running water, moistening the gaunt stone mountains

又将天地一展 伸手 试浓淡 and again spreading heaven and earth wide, reaching out to test the viscosity (of the water).

It took a few listens, but in the end I really enjoyed the aesthetics here. And again, this verse is quite straight to the point albeit with two things I cannot understand.

The first point of confusion for me is why the lyricist chose to use 桥 | qiáo, a bridge as the place for people to rest on their journeys. I assumed here that this in reference to a pier or dock, assumed also that he is donating funds for this structure to be built or repaired. However, if that were the case 坞 | wù would have been enough - 船坞 was supposedly invented only in the Song Dynasty though, so maybe that’s why another word was chosen. But it’s not like there is any incidence of 桥 being used to mean ‘dock’ either!

The second thing that confuses me is the use of 典 for 流水. In verse one, that 典 was referring to the poetry works sold to reserve the venue for a banquet. That usage was apt. Here I suspect it might be for parallel structure, because there is no alternative reading for 典 that might allow one to use their 30% 三分 to do anything to flowing water 流水. That’s the literal reading, of course.

If we’re taking this a little less literally, it can be interpreted as borrowing the scenery (figuratively, since the place would not belong to anyone in the way you might own a property) to admire. It also expands on the second line’s mention of the surrounding view 欣然八方风物; there is running water which completes 润色 and brings the appearance of the gaunt and rocky mountains 枯瘦石山 closer to perfection.

润色 | rùn sè means to polish, to bring to greater heights. When you say something has been 润色 it is made more brilliant and closer to perfection by that addition. It can also mean moisten.

We always hear ‘rivers and mountains like a painting’ 江山如画 - originating from Su Dongpo’s《念奴娇·赤壁怀古》- used when the scenery is wonderful, because how often is real life as ideal as what we can imagine and depict? And that is exactly what is described here. The feeling out if the ‘water’ is concentrated or diluted 试浓淡 is used in answer to 一展 unfurling. 浓淡 of ink to 一展 of painting scroll. The land and sky seem like an ink wash painting, so beautiful that the viewer cannot help but reach out to run their hand through the water.

Chorus

Chorus Part 1

若趁游兴直到酣 If we take advantage of our wanderlust and go roaming till it is sated,

千字文章不值钱 classics and essays shan’t be worth a coin.

诗换花 词换雪 A poem for a flower! A song for snow!

再作檄文斗天官 Another denunciation for those heavenly officials!

Starting off with three new terms for me: 游兴 | yóu xìng means enthusiasm for travel. 酣 | hān can mean having a great time drinking, or being very satisfied and satiated. 檄文 | xí wén is a type of official document written for important announcements, declaration of war, or denunciation and condemnation of certain people or actions.

While I still feel this need to go out to see the world, I shall keep on the road until I am satisfied. Who cares about writing, who cares for study, it’s all worthless to me. I do what I want. And what I want is to write a little poem in exchange for a flower, some lyrics for a flake of snow. I’ll even write a denunciation against those officials in heaven (immortals). Fight me!!!!

I point again at Verse 1 with climbing the tower to play with stars. It’s no longer just playing nearby, now he wants a go at the gods.

Among the four parts of the chorus, this one is the simplest for sure. The lines mean exactly what is said. It also feels the most chaotic and mischievous. Is the speaker drunk? Is he high on something? One thing’s for sure. He’s out of money.

Chorus Part 2

何愁不得一样我 Why feel troubled that (I) cannot have another just like me?

知交尽向话中添 for one who understands you and is understood, look entirely towards stories to fill that place

唐解元 嵇中散 people like Tang Bohu (first in provincial examinations) and proud, upright and stubborn Ji Kang

且驰大梦任疯癫 Just chase that great dream, allow yourself to go mad.

I feel like the first two lines are quite straightforward, though they might not appear so on first reading: How could there be a need to feel sad or troubled that I have no like-minded equal. To find a true friend who understands you without need for words, and whom you understand in return, all you need to do is turn to those tales and stories 话中 for people to fill 添 that place.

唐解元 - People like Tang Yin, courtesy name: Bohu 唐寅, 字伯虎 (1470–1524 AD), noted painter, calligrapher and poet of the Ming Dynasty. Tang Yin led a life full of ups and downs that really cannot be covered in a paragraph’s worth of song translation notes. You can check out his wiki page if you’re curious though! There’s a little more on him where I cover the last line of this section. He is addressed as 解元 | jiè yuán here which is the term for the top scorer of the provincial examinations (second stage in the Imperial examination ladder). It is also an honorific for scholars. Tang Bohu is both.

嵇中散 - People like Ji Kang, courtesy name: Shuye 嵇康, 字叔夜, (223–262 AD), one of the Seven Sages of the Bamboo Grove - a group of friends who wisely kept themselves aloof from the dangerous politics of the Court, and devoted themselves to art, refinement and debate, of the Three Kingdoms period. He was a Daoist philosopher, musician, writer and poet.  

An accomplished musician, the qin composition 廣凌散 | guǎnglíng sàn is attributed to Ji Kang, though some versions of the story claim he learned it from a ghost while stopping at a pavillion on his way home. 嵇中散 was one of the names he was known by because of his appointment to the position of Attendant Counsellor, 中散大夫 | zhōng sàn dàfū, a civil official unspecified duties in the court of Cao Wei.

When Ji Kang was sentenced to death for his attempt to testify for a wrongly accused friend, three thousand scholars petitioned for his pardon to no avail. It’s said that at the execution ground, while they waited for the appointed hour, he had his favourite qin brought out and played a brilliant interpretation of Guanglin San that is now forever lost.

Do go read about them both if you have the time!

I would like to point out for the last line that 任 is to allow, to indulge, and it’s just such a heady sensation to say 任疯癫 - indulge in the madness! throw yourself in and don’t look back!

There is an easter egg here too. A nod to a poem by Tang Yin which can be read as his stance on his lifestyle choice after the alleged accusations of bribery in the final step of the Imperial examinations left him disgraced, and unable to pursue a civil career. Thematically the line does not call back to the poem at all, similarities end with the choice of words: chasing the dream 驰大梦 and indulging madness 任疯癫.  I leave an excerpt below. Translation again by me.

《桃花庵歌》- Song of a Plum Blossom Cottage // 若将花酒比车马 | if tawdriness and wine were compared against fine carriage and steed 他得驱驰我得闲 | he would have to drive and work hard for speed whilst I have my idle rest 别人笑我太疯癫 | others mock me for my madness 我笑他人看不穿 | i am amused for they do not perceive 不见五陵豪杰墓 | can’t you see that at the Emperors’ mausoleums and heroes’ graves 无花无酒锄做田 | there are no flowers, no wine, only land ploughed for farming

The second part of the chorus isn’t related to the first, but it has the same theme of showcasing the untamable (unhinged xD) spirit of the speaker. This time, the people he admires ‘intellectual equals’ and kindred spirits are featured, the 任性 feeling here has been pushed to greater heights.

Chorus Part 3

敢夸洒落何须酒 If one dares to boast of carefreeness, why, they hardly need wine.

不煮黄粱也称仙 Even without brewing millet they would still be called Immortal.

镜湖桌 白梅盏 The tables in the mirror-like lake, white plum blossoms in the cups,

等来春风恰开宴 await the spring breeze which arrives just in time for the feast to start!

Li Bai is regarded as both the god of poetry 诗仙 and god of drunkards wine 酒仙 because he wrote some of his greatest poems while drinking. The first two lines seem to be gently poking fun at that. Like hey, if you dare to claim to be all groovy, surely you have no need for alcohol? Just like how an immortal would still be an immortal without wine, your writing talent should not need any stimulants. This would be the time to mention that 黄粱 | huáng liáng is also known as millet, a type of grain that can be used to brew wine.

洒落 | sǎ luò has a few meanings, like shower down or blame, but the relevant one here would be 洒脱 generous, uninhibited and open. For me it feels similar to 风流 in that there is that ‘free, and exhilaratingly unrestrained’ element. 洒落 is in the most positive sense, being always open to having a good time, but without that dissolute or vaguely whirlwind-romance like connotation of 风流.

It feels like the intensity is letting up a little here - this is a light-hearted and frivolous song all the way through, but the words 洒落, 称仙 and imagery of a clear lake, white plum blossoms and the crisp spring breeze are grounding and sweet. Spirited in a different way from before.

Chorus Part 4

四角天地也醺然 The four corners and heaven and earth are also tipsy,

醉极自有桃李搀 when I’ve overindulged, my students will be there to help.

快意只 笔下讨 Gratification can only be claimed from beneath the brush;

何必诗债换酒钱 is falling into poetry debt worth that money for drink?

New words: 醺然 | xūn rán just means drunk. A new word for me though! 桃李 | táo lǐ is literally peach 桃 and plum 李 (李花, also known as 玉梅) flowers, and is a metaphor for students. The term originates from a story in 《韩诗外传》which was set in the Wei Kingdom of the Spring and Autumn period (771 to 476 BCE). There was once a highly ranked official who was sacked from his post and left for the north. He met another gentleman and remarked that the people he helped before did not lift a finger when he was in need. This person replied that, if someone were to plant peach and plum trees in spring, he could relax under their shade in the Summer and taste their fruit in the Autumn. But if that person were to plant weeds, nothing can be done with their leaves in Spring and there would only be burrs to hurt himself on in Autumn. Clearly the people the unfortunate gentlemen had helped before were not worth his effort. Students ought to be carefully selected and carefully cultivated as one would a tree.

Reading the four corners and heaven and earth 四角天地 are also tipsy 也醺然, I imagine the world sort of spinning around the speaker because he is drunk. But that’s okay, because his students (or the trees xD) will be there to support him.

快意 | kuài yì is the feeling of sudden relaxation, and then lightheartedness and joy. In this line, I felt like the intention would be closer to 畅快，爽快 and so chose gratification, because really writing is like scratching an itch isn’t it? Pleasure from satisfaction of a desire. Phrasing it as 笔下讨 is so very fitting though, because 讨 can be interpreted - somewhat contradicting - as either to demand or to beg. What could be more gratifying than having squeezed out the perfect sentence or word under your figurative pen?

So so so after all that, 何必诗债换酒钱? What do you think, is alcohol worth the poetry debt? Is Mr. Poet actually drunk and about to dig himself a deeper hole of owed poems to get even MORE drunk, or has he just been thinking about it all along? :)

Thoughts

This has been such a fun adventure following our madcap big spender from the shining Chang’an to the inviting Qinhuai, shadow of great poets in tow and all. We’ve done everything from talking to the moon and seeing the sights by her light, to boating down a river, dragging fingers through the water. It was sort of like being on a backpacking tour, except with with someone contemplating opening (or perhaps regretting opening this can of worms?) poetry commissions instead of singing in the streets?

Dear reader, if you’ve reached this point of my post, thank you. I hope you enjoy the song as much as I do now!

[youarejesting]

Curse.18 Vows

[First] [Previous] [Masterlist] [Next] Pairing: Prince!Jin x Reader Rating: PG Words: 1.4k

Summary: A modern-day fairy tale whereby seven young princes born under King Bang’s greed cannot find true love. Unless they break a special spell, called the ‘Bang curse’. In order to break the curse Prince Seokjin must be loved by a ‘Blue’ blood, by a royal. That seems almost impossible when you have a pig nose. (based off the movie Penelope)

Kim Seokjin was standing in his room, his younger brothers were talking happily. Well all except Taehyung who had been locked in his room throwing a tantrum. Jimin said he had been crying all night, and Seokjin felt sorry for his brother and hoped soon he would understand and come to terms with his decision. 

Yoongi helped Seokjin with his bow tie though he was Seokjin’s younger brother he had seen him through the most and still stood by his side indifferent to most things. 

“I got you a collection of fancy tiny spoons, that have no real purpose” Hoseok smiled. Shaking his present box to hear the silverware clattering inside. The group laughed wholesomely, and Adora poked her head in the door with a defeated Taehyung in tow. 

“All you boys have to head out to the garden,” she smiled. 

“Sure,” they said picking up their coats and checking their hair and teeth one last time. Seokjin felt sick, it was a mix of emotions. He was nervous that she wouldn’t show up or wouldn’t say I do, he was afraid she would and he would be stuck with her forever and he was sad because he wasn’t happy. 

“Hyung can we talk?” Taehyung grabbed his arm stopping his older brother from leaving, Seokjin nodded the other boys onward and Taehyung frowned. 

“I will stand by you, Seokjin, whatever your decision is, if you want to marry Alana then I will support you, and if you don’t I will be here too.” Taehyung handed Seokjin a small box. “Because you are my brother” 

Seokjin opened the box to reveal a small tin decorated in raspberries and inside was a candle. Seokjin was hit with the buttercream scent and a wave of hurt, he had been hiding his emotions behind this wedding and the feelings were still so fresh and raw. 

“I know you are trying to push your feelings aside and do what is asked of you, but don’t turn into a puppet. Not all feelings are good feelings, some feelings feel bad, but we cannot forget them, we feel them and we grow hyung. Don't forget the first girl you ever loved.” He sighed “take it from us boys we don’t know what love feels like, we have never felt it, only empty words spoken. You can feel it and so you shouldn’t push it away or it might disappear altogether and you will be just like us brother”

Seokjin nodding hugging his younger brother and Taehyung whispered “I don’t know what love is but when you are sad I am sad and when you are happy I am too”

“Thank you Tae,” The two walked out to the garden where guests were seated, Seokjin stood at the end of the aisle under a beautiful archway and the ceremony began. 

The old man officiating the wedding was going on and on about love and unity and Seokjin could almost swear he saw Alana sniffling and wiping tears looking anywhere but at his face. 

He felt almost sorry for the girl but at the same time, Seokjin knew he was handsome and without the nose he would look even more so. So he knew for a fact someone as superficial as Alana if she could get past the trauma of seeing his nose would easily fall for his face and charm. 

Like kissing a frog in a fairy tale he would become the beautiful prince. It was his favourite fairytale. He always loved it dearly, just because it always felt nice to be represented; a prince cursed with little chance to find love. And yet as most fairytales did, it still had a happy ending. The idea that there was someone out there who could love him for who he was and nothing more.

It was almost laughable how he thought this wished this could be his life for many years and stupid of him to belief it would turn out like this with you. He found himself imagining it was you under the veil, tears in the corner of your eyes from joy and that small smile on your face. He could see it now you would be fidgeting your hands and he would take them reassuring you that he was here with you.

You would whisper during the ceremony that you loved him and affectionately call him one of the many nicknames you had invented over the few months you had spent together.

It was time to say the vows. Where had the time gone, he realized he had lost himself in his imagination and listened for the cues. Alana had said a strained ‘I do’ and his heart was racing he knew this was wrong and he didn’t know if he could say the words.

“Do you Kim Seokjin Eldest Prince of Gyeonggi take Alana Duchess of Gwangju to be your lawful wedded wife, to have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health till death do you part” The officiate said and with each clause he felt the weight grow, was he ready to spend his life with someone he didn’t love.

This wasn’t his Fairytale.

Seokjin stepped back bumping into Taehyung who looked at him curiously, his younger brother taking his arm reassuringly. He didn’t exactly hear what he said as it sounded muffled.

“You don’t have to do this Hyung,” Taehyung repeated, squeezing his arm and trying to catch his shaking pupils which were scanning the crowd wildly. Seokjin felt his ears burn and he just wanted the safety of his room, he couldn’t do this anymore.

“I don’t,” he stormed off back down the Aisle his brother’s calling after him desperately, Taehyung abandoning his post to follow his brother. He was able to catch up and catch the door in time, he saw Seokjin through the mirror off the wall and sob into his hands.

“Hyung, I am here,” He held his brother crying with him, “I am here for you”

“I am sorry, I couldn’t do it, I am sorry” Seokjin apologized to Taehyung, gripping the younger man's suit jacket and crying against his shoulder. “I can’t even look at myself, I am hideous and no one every will love me when I can’t even love myself.”

“I will love you Hyung, just the way you are, I don’t know how but I love you, in my own special way.” Taehyung desperately gripped his brother as their tears were pulled to the earth like rain. Seokjin felt weird and floaty, something was wrong. His head was spinning and he felt himself slipping from consciousness.

When he came to, he was laying against Taehyung’s shoulder, the two were softly sleeping leaning against the foot of his bed, the floorboards were not comfortable for Seokjin’s hips. Seokjin sat up and went to the bathroom to splash water on his face and when he did, he dried his face feeling through the towel a strangeness that he wasn’t used to. Like his nose was numb, he couldn’t feel it anymore. Well, he could, it was just odd. 

Looking up he screeched flailing back into the wall. Before slowly looking this way and that touching it gently. “Hyung, are you okay?”

He looked at Taehyung who smiled cheekily, “My brother is handsome,”

“I love you Taehyung, you're the best little brother I could ask for, the only one to support me through everything,” Seokjin said, hugging his brother who giggled.

“Hyung, I can feel love now, it is heavy but it is warm,” Taehyung touched his chest and then looked up shocked.

“Hyung, I forgot to tell you and it’s really important”

“Jin-Hyung” Namjoon shouted “There is someone you have to meet!”

“Woah you are super handsome!” Hoseok grinned covering his mouth.

“Our brother is World wide handsome” Jimin punched his arm excitedly.

“Jin, this is Suryeon, the real Suryeon,” Namjoon said, gesturing to a young lady who looked confused and waved politely.

“That’s what I had to tell you, the fake Suryeon was actually named Y/n. She loved you Jin, but she found out about the curse and that a blue blood had to break it and she freaked out and left. She didn’t want to disappoint you,” Taehyung explained. 

“Adora has her folder, she had three jobs and lost them and her home and it turns out our dad had gotten into an accident that killed her parents.” Taehyung sighed “So not only was she an orphan, she was made homeless and currently she is trying to find somewhere to live so she will be leaving on Sunday, November 1st”

“You will have to read her folder,” Jungkook said softly, “it seemed she really loved you hyung, with or without the nose”

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[iwillsinkwithmyships]

Beautiful Boy, Bathed in Disaster

As he laid dying in a Siberian bunker Tony Stark thinks about betrayals and broken promises. Left behind and half-dead he is faced with his worst nightmare.

Notes: This was literally written in hours, which is insane because usually I take forever to finish even a one shot. But this just flowed! The title comes from the song "In Loving Memory" by Chester Lockhart which played in repeat while I wrote this. I recommend you listen to it as you read it as well lol

There is a slight canon divergence as in my story, Pepper and Tony broke up after Iron Man 3 and Tony and Steve get together a little after Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

Borrowed some quotes from other Avengers works, such as comics and AA

AO3 Link

"Mr. Stark."

"Captain."

-

"Is everything a joke to you?"

"Funny things are."

-

"Big man in a suit of armor... take that off, what are you?"

"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist."

"I know guys with none of that worth ten of you. I've seen the footage, the only thing you really fight for is yourself. You are not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."

"I think I would just cut the wire."

"Always a way out. You know, you may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero."

"A hero? Like you? You're a laboratory experiment Rogers. Everything special about you came out of a bottle."

-

"What the hell! What just happened? Please tell me nobody kissed me."

"We won."

"Oh, alright, yay! Alright, good job guys! Uh, let's just not come in tomorrow. Let's just take a day. You ever try shawarma? There is a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don't know what it is, but I wanna try it."

"We are not finished yet."

"And then shawarma after?"

-

"Oh really you two knew each other? He never mentioned that...maybe only a thousand times. God, I hated you."

-

"Sometimes I wanna punch you in your perfect teeth, but I don't want to see you gone. We need you Cap."

-

"Winghead"

"Shellhead"

-

"You are walking a little funny Steve, next time you should establish a safe word." . . . "You are walking a little funny Tony, what was that you were saying about a safe word?"

"Hilarious."

-

"Wait a second, no one else gonna deal with the fact that Cap just said 'language'?"

"I know...It just slipped out."

-

"We'll lose."

"Then we'll do that together too."

-

"Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things."

-

"I don't trust a guy without a dark side. Call me old fashioned."

"Well let's just say you haven't seen it yet."

-

"How can you possibly hope to stop me?"

"Well, like the old man said: together."

-

"No way we all make it through this."

"I got no plans tomorrow night."

-

"I will miss you Tony"

-

"Tony, when I woke up on this era, I had no one. Nothing. You gave me a purpose, somewhere to belong...You gave me a home."

-

"You wanna survive you gotta change with the times."

"Spend a few decades frozen in ice, then we can talk about survival."

"Just say it, say 'Tony I'm afraid of new tech!' admitting you have a problem is always the first step."

"Gosh Mr. Big Brain, your modern tech is so gol-darn confusing. How does this contraption turn water into coffee? Is it coal power or is it a miracle?"

"Hmm, sarcasm must be a modern invention, because when you do it, it just sounds wrong."

-

"But, with my armor gone, all I can do is improvise. Steve, even without your shield, you're still captain America. Without my armor I'm just ..."

"Tony Stark, THE Tony Stark, billionaire, genius, you are probably one of the three smartest men in the entire world. You are as tough as they come, you invented hardcore. The avengers are lucky you are on our side."

"Really? you know two people smarter than me?"

"Can't you just take a compliment."

-

"I am not half as good at - at anything as I am when I'm doing it next to you. And that's the truth."

-

"I love you."

"I love you too."

-

"Good morning Beloved. Did anyone check the dumpster for Clint yet?"

"Funny you should ask that..."

-

"I love you."

"I love you too."

-

"I'm worried about you, if you don't get some sleep..."

"I slept for 70 years - "

"Yeah, you've used that line before."

"Leave me alone. I am a senior citizen."

-

"I love you."

"I love you too."

-

"He's my friend."

"So was I."

-

"Did you know?"

"I wasn't sure it was him--"

"Don't bullshit me Rogers! Did. You. Know?"

"Yes."

-

Images and memories flashed through Tony's mind as he laid on the cold floor of the abandoned Hydra base. The Siberian cold penetrating his suit as his mind raced.

Steve had known the truth about his parents' death for years. He'd known when they fought Ultron. He'd known when he gave Tony shit about keeping secrets, the fucking hypocrite. He'd known over a year ago, he'd known when he leaned over the table to kiss Tony. He'd known when they tumbled into bed that same night. He'd known for the rest of their relationship, even when he whispered "I love you" late at night and when Tony had said it right back.

He'd known.

And now all Tony was left with was a broken suit and an abandoned shield.

Tears fell out of his eyes as he fell back to the floor. Steve had left. He'd taken Barnes and walked right out, without sparing a second thought for Tony. After he and Pepper had broken up Tony had resigned himself to being alone for the rest of his life. Then Steve had kissed him and all of the sudden Tony had been in love again. They'd still fought but Tony had learned to see Steve's side of things and to explain his side of things to Steve. Tony had been sure that this was it. He'd fallen hard and fast for Steve.

"Well that shows you, huh Stark."

-----

Some time later, Tony's eyes startled open as he realized that he had no way out of that bunker.

-----

The temperature kept dropping, and Tony had long given up hope of a rescue.

"Well Yinsen, it looks like I did waste my life after all... I'm sorry."

Tony closed his eyes.

-----

When Tony came to again, everything was still cold and painful. He tried to move, but the suit was frozen and still dead, quiet honestly, Tony didn't know how he was still alive.

The sound of footsteps echoed through the bunker, and Tony blinked trying to place the sound. Had FRIDAY alerted Vision?

A few minutes later two slender figures walked towards him.

"Father," he didn't recognize the breathy feminine voice that rang out, "We've found him. We've got Stark."

"He looks half dead. Should we put him out of his misery?" Another woman said, her voice a lot more confident. The two figures walked closer, and Tony struggle to keep his eyes open. There was no way he could defend himself.

"Patience daughter, I have plans for Stark." A deep voice responded. The two women walked into the sliver of light that managed to get into his cold dark tomb. He finally laid eyes on them and his breathing grew harsher. The two women were not...human. They were humanoid, but one of them was blue, and her body was littered with mechanic enhancements, the other was completely green with deep burgundy hair. The two of them exuded murderous vibes. The kind that Tony usually only got from Natasha and Pepper. He drew in a harsh breath and tried once more to get up from the cold floor he'd been planing to die in.

"Such fighting spirit. It's a pity that humanity does not appreciate you Anthony Stark." An imposing figure approached from the shadows. He was huge, probably bigger than the hulk himself. "I have waited a long time to meet you Stark."

"Yo...u..... kno...w....m...e?" he managed to croak out.

"I do, you are not the only one cursed with knowledge."

"..w- wh..who...?" Tony could barely keep conscious. He was still on the verge of death, and aliens invading earth was literally his worst nightmare. A new voice rang out and a squid looking figure joined the others.

"Rejoice, you will have the privilege of being saved by The Great Titan, Thanos."

"Wh...wh.." Tony gasped for breath, "...why...?"

"I have come for you Stark. Earth's Greatest Defender. When I first enslaved the Asgardian, I thought his task a simple one. After all this planet is quite primitive compared to others we've conquered before. Yet, you and your team managed to defeat my army." The titan walked closer to him, "Imagine my surprise at realizing that it hadn't been your Asgardian ally who'd laid waste to my ships and army, but a simple human. Fascinating. After that it was difficult not to pay attention. Time and time again, you defend it, and this is your reward" The titan waved a hand towards the pathetic picture Tony painted.

"G..go..f..fuh..Fuck...yo...yours...self." Thanos smiled and waved a hand to those behind him.

"Give him a blood transfusion, The Accuser should have provided enough, and make sure he survives. Once he's no longer on the brink of death, bring him to me."

---------------------

Tony had passed out after his encounter with Thanos and when he'd woken up he was being moved. The pain had dulled down, most likely a result of the forced blood transfusion. He'd shuddered as he thought about it. Once more a victim of nonconsensual body modifications.

This nightmare just kept getting worse.

He was laid on a hard surface and bound. The genius took a moment to analyze his current situation, he seemed to be in some sort of medical room, there were holograms displaying what he assumed to be his own vitals. The technology seemed advanced and otherworldly so he took this to mean that he'd somehow made it into the ship. What was this Thanos actually doing here? Where they still on Earth? Was Earth under attack?

That final thought made him pull at his restrains, he immediately slumped back in the bed his body still felt like he'd been run over by a bus.

'or two super-soldiers'

Tony closed his eyes as the entire fight replayed in his mind. God he'd been so fucking stupid. And now here he was trapped by some crazy alien bent on conquering earth. Who would protect Earth now? Rogers and Barnes were definitely on the wind now. About half of the team were sitting in Ross's super secret prison. He hoped Vision runs and hides that damn stone. God knows were Natasha was hiding.

And Rhodey. Rhodey was in no condition to fight.

The door to the room he was currently trapped in opened and in walked the mad titan himself, accompanied by his two daughters? Who looked nothing like him.

"Stark, you are awake."

"Where am I? What do you want? You better stay away from Earth or I swe-"

"Don't worry, the time will come but there is much to do before I return for Earth's salvation." Tony's jaw clenched as he watched the purple maniac approach him. "Like I said, I am here for you Stark."

"What do you want from me? From the looks of this ship, you have no need for my tech much less my money, so what do you want? Weapons? I'll die before I ever create another weapon of mass destruction!" The titan simply smiled and sat beside him. His two deadly looking daughters stood guard by the door.

"I am here to offer you a place in my order, as my son and perhaps my heir." Tony stared incredulously and glanced at the other two in the room and saw their shocked expressions. So he hadn't shared his plans for Tony with them.

"Excuse me?!"

"I admire your bravery and tenacity Anthony, you would do well in my order and when I have achieved perfect balance in this entire universe I wish to retire, but I must leave someone in charge. I think you would do well."

"You are out of your mind." the brunette gritted out.

"You could help me save this entire universe from itself, and then you would be the most powerful man in the universe. Join us Stark"

"Never. I can't believe you thought that I'd say yes to this."

"You and I are quite similar you know. I too was called mad for trying to protect my planet. I tried to save my planet and our people, I was ignored, and the entire planet perished. Are you not tired Anthony? Of trying to save a planet that doesn't want to be saved?" The ache in Tony's chest grew and he continued to glare at Thanos.

"Never." Thanos let out a disappointed sigh and got back on his feet.

"I had hoped you would see reason," he walked towards the medical equipment in the room, "perhaps a little reminder of what Earth has repaid your loyalty with will help."

Tony couldn't help his scream at the pain his head was under. As he trashed he thought he saw pitying looks come from the two women by the door.

Everything went dark.

-

His father sitting him down at 8 years-old and handing him a glass of whiskey. The start of his alcohol problems.

-

His father handing him hot tools despite his bare hands. The reason he doesn't like being handed things.

-

Tiberius Stone.

-

The Cave. The open hear surgery without anesthesia. The waterboarding. Yinsen.

-

"When I ordered the hit on you, I worried that I was killing the golden goose. But you see, it was just fate that you survived that, you had one last golden egg to give."

-

The Palladium poisoning. The fight with Rhodey. Rhodey taking off with his suit.

-

The helicarrier fight.

-

Extremis. Maya. Aldrich. AIM.

-

His break up with Pepper.

-

Ultron. Thor lifting him by the neck, as everyone watched and did nothing to stop him.

-

A video of the winter soldier killing his parents. Steve's betrayal.

-

Steve walking out on him with Barnes in his arms and dropping the shield.

-

"Tell me my child, do you wish to forget? To bury all this pain and suffering. All the betrayal and abandonment?" . . . . . . . .

"Yes."

[nevertickleasleepingbadger]

Re-sorting the Weasleys

Ok first installment of a re-sorting series! One of the biggest weaknesses of the HP universe is the very flat, one sided sorting. Brave=Gryffindor, Smart=Ravenclaw, Kind=Hufflepuff, Cunning (Evil??)=Slytherin I understand that for some of the plot devices to work, certain characters had to be in certain houses, but it always came off as lazy to me that all the Weasleys were in Gryffindor (for decades???). I honestly never really understood whole families going into one house in general- considering how different all these people are, did the Sorting Hat just give up and assign all gingers to the red house? ANYWAY. Here’s my defense of where I think they should go, based on the fandom’s collective interpretations of the houses. And many thanks to @flockdynamics​, for your discussion and help!

Arthur Weasley- Ravenclaw

At first, Arthur comes off as this very goofy character. Which he is, no doubt, but this man is also a genius- his whole job is spent undoing charms and hexes on muggle objects which undoubtedly involves creativity and skill. He is constantly tinkering and coming up with really inventive adjustments and improvements on objects- objects that few wizards understand the workings of at all! I saw a Weasley appreciation post awhile back that mentioned Arthur’s obsession with batteries and how he could be looking into the possibility of storing magical energy and I 100% believe this to be true. He’s not just collecting these items because they look fun, he’s studying them and trying to figure out how they work and how he can incorporate magic into muggle inventions. And he goes through the effort to write loopholes into his own laws so that what he’s doing isn’t strictly illegal which just kills me. One of the true hallmarks of Ravenclaws, beyond just plain intelligence, is cleverness and ingenuity (and a constant desire to learn and push the boundaries of understanding). Ravenclaws aren’t just interested in things you can learn from books and they encourage out-of-the-box thinking. One of the first things he does when he meets anyone connected to muggles is to immediately start asking questions and learning. Also don’t forget that he wrote (co-wrote?) the Muggle Protection Act. His demeanor is jubilant and laid back and he certainly shows great bravery at times, but his baseline behavior is to be in the background, steady and confident and pushing the boundaries in his own way. He is a great source of comfort to his family and to Harry. He always takes Harry seriously and does his best to protect him in the ways he can. In the muggle world, he would totally be that spacey college professor whose office is a mess with random artifacts and weird comics pinned up everywhere, but when you talk to them you realize they are about 10x smarter than you. Molly Weasley- Hufflepuff Ah, Molly- the badger indeed. Loving and fiercely protective. We hardly ever get to see Molly outside of the context of motherhood, but I imagine we see the worst of her temper as she attempts to raise 7 children amidst two wars. I think the Molly underneath all the stress is strong, empathetic, and comforting. We see her unkindness towards Fleur do a 180 as soon as she realizes that Fleur isn’t someone she needs to protect Bill from. She might not get points for patience, but she is certainly stubborn! Overall, Molly is deeply emotional and she keeps her emotions close to the surface. She is soft (in a good way) and warm and just unbelievably capable. The intensity of her kindness towards Harry (knitting him a sweater his first year even though she had only once briefly met him because she guessed, presumably from Ron’s letters, that he needed a family). That’s the kind of person Molly is.  Bill Weasley- Ravenclaw I struggled a bit with Bill because the age gap between Harry and Bill might skew our perception of him a bit. Bill is certainly the cool, calm, and collected older brother. The hair, the earring, the swagger- I absolutely adore Bill. Bill always comes off as a bit reserved- not shy but just someone who doesn’t say more than they have to. But this could just be his age and maturity compared to his younger siblings. His family’s obvious disdain for his fiance, Fleur, seems to roll off his back and we rarely see him raise his voice or lose his cool. He is just an incredibly competent man and wizard. Skills with curse breaking and wards really scream Ravenclaw to me- these are skills that take perseverance and creativity to master- something that might not mesh well with the brute force and brashness of a Gryffindor. He is obviously someone who can work with Goblins, which tells me he is tactful and careful and must have paid attention in History of Magic. And how could I forget, Head Boy and 12 Outstanding OWLs. Slowclap for Bill Weasley, everyone. Charlie Weasley- Hufflepuff?? Who knows because it’s a crime we have almost nothing to go on with this fabulous character. A well built, quidditch playing, dragon wrangler?? Cmon JK Rowling- we need more Charlie Weasley. His love for Care of Magical Creatures automatically makes me gravitate towards Hufflepuff (Hagrid is my next big installment post, don’t worry) and the little we see of him shows us a popular, warm, and dedicated guy. But that’s all I can really say! Percy Weasley- Slytherin I know this one is going to be controversial so let me start out by saying this is partially based on a rejection of JKR’s version of Slytherin. I’m not sure if we are just supposed to blame Harry’s unreliable POV, but Slytherin is a mess. So if we strip away some of the ugliest caricatures of the house, Slytherins are crafty, resourceful, driven, and deeply protective of tradition. Percy is seriousssss. He’s a snob, absolutely. He sees everything as an opportunity and he feels he is fighting an uphill battle to separate himself from his family, who don’t share his commitment to self-betterment. He bleeds ambition and unfortunately, because of the political climate that he grows up in, he has the perfect personality to get swept up in government corruption. He realizes his mistakes, but he is prideful and it takes him awhile to face his family and own up to them. We see him full of regret but not yet able to apologize at Christmas during HBP, and of course his arc comes full circle at the Battle of Hogwarts. Tradition and correctness are very important to Percy and he needs constant validation that he is in control. He is in a bit of an awkward age gap with his siblings and I think often ends up as the odd man out and as such, he overcompensates by trying to rise above the chaos of his family and he isolates himself in the process. Percy is also bullied relentlessly by Fred and George, and this really hardens him and pushes him further away. I think it is probably good that he wasn’t sorted into Slytherin in canon, because the divide between Percy and the other Weasleys is already wide and it would have really hurt Percy in the long run. But that being said, JKR wrote the perfect Slytherin with Percy, she just didn’t act on it. He could never have survived as the odd man out in his family in Slytherin, but in a different universe, he fits. Fred & George- Gryffindor I struggled with them because in a way, I wanted to split them up because I think they really can encompass more than one house but I think that F&G are a FORCE together and need to stay as such. I was originally leaning towards Ravenclaw for them just based on the extreme wit and creativity they possess, but as @flockdynamics pointed out to me, I think their intentions are very important. Life is a joke for these two and it’s full of color and noise. They are whip smart and very ambitious and honestly would have thrived in any house- I don’t see them letting house boundaries define them (especially if we cast aside the Gryffindor ancestry of the Weasleys). But their inventions and ingenuity don’t stem from a desire to research and push the boundaries of wizard invention. They just want to make stuff and blow shit up and have a good time. And sure, they want to build a business and make the money they never had growing up, but making people happy and bringing humor into the world are their #1 goals. They are brave in the most foolhardy, Gryffindor way (U-No-Poo anyone?) and never back down from a challenge. They act before thinking and can be bullies (their treatment of Percy, Ron, and sometimes Hermione definitely comes off this way). They often don’t stop to consider emotional tact because they really just live in their own world where everything is fun.  Ron- Gryffindor In all her missteps with the houses, I think JKR spent a lot of time making the golden trio fit into her views of Gryffindor traits. Ron is often tactless and self-centered but he is also deeply empathetic (especially towards the end as he’s maturing). I think bravery is an oversimplification of Gryffindor- I think Gryffindor to me is more about being just. They definitely exhibit overt bravery by going off on adventures or putting themselves in danger for loved ones. But moreover, Gryffindors are motivated by an unerring sense of justice and sense of how things should be- they often can’t see the nuances or slow down to consider the best course of action before diving in. Ron’s relationship with Harry is one of the best teenage boy relationships I’ve seen. Ron is there for Harry and legit willing to fight by his side time and time again. He knows when to be supportive, when to give Harry space, when to argue, when to capitulate. His misgivings with Hermione are a different story of dumb teenage hormones and misunderstandings. Ron gives 100% and puts his life on the line for his friends. He really struggles with deep feelings of inadequacy compared to his brothers and struggles to find a place for himself being in Harry’s and their shadows. This really overshadows his underlying personality and makes him act out. I can actually see adult Ron acting much more like a Hufflepuff: stalwart, dependable, and caring but also fiercely protective of those he’s close to. But his personality growing up is definitely Gryffindor. Ginny- Slytherin?? But probably Gryffindor Ginny, Ginny, Ginny. man this one is hard. One look at my blog will probably tell you she is one of my favorite characters, but she is also one that suffers from Harry’s unreliable POV. She went through unimaginable trauma at the age of 11 and was saved by none other than her girlhood crush/brother’s best friend/famous quasi family member. It’s an odd position for her to be in. She is broken and deeply embarrassed and spends time rebuilding herself away from Harry. Which is completely understandable, but it means the audience suffers from not getting to know Ginny until much later and she keeps herself at arms length with Harry until their relationship begins. I think Ginny is largely misunderstood by the fandom and the complete obliteration of her character by the movies doesn’t help. BUT, damn if Ginny is not a BAMF. Sneaky, witty, sometimes harsh and sharp but also loving and bubbly and effervescent. She is the embodiment of “bitch, I won’t hesitate”. Growing up with 6 brothers really pushes Ginny to be rough, unapologetic, and outspoken and we see that side of her often- berating Fleur, hexing/crashing into Zacharias, tripping Ron, etc. Her friendship with Luna gives us glimpses into the softer sides of Ginny. As much as fans love Luna, it always strikes me as odd that they easily dismiss the person Luna seems closest to as boring and mean. Luna seems like an excellent judge of character and not one to seek out negative people (but I digress). I think Ginny is a complex character that the books barely scratch the surface of. By the end, Ginny really exudes confidence and she bravely takes on part of the role of running the DA during the darkest year at Hogwarts. In a world away from the blood purity nonsense, I would totally put her in Slytherin. Her tenacity, perseverance, and cunning really match up well with many of the things Slytherins claim to possess and she shows us time and time again she is willing to push social boundaries to make herself heard/seen. The prejudices associated with Slytherin muddy the waters so in canon, Gryffindor is a good place for her. 

[egyptroyal]

doctor headcanon

a headcanon that’s actually canon because the doctor’s been fucking queen elizabeth I and cleopatra but, have no kids??? especially during the eras where condoms weren’t invented and them being a doctor, they would literally inform them that their other methods are putting them at a health risk...like? i mean they still did it with other people but like with the doctor, nah so, any way

when you remember that the doctor and other ones that were born during pythia’s curse were infertile and so now, you realize that the only reason the doctor would ever fuck people without a condom (if that was ever asked) is because no one, no matter how much dna rearranging they have to do on their part, doctor cannot physically have (inseminate others or get pregnant with) kids during the human/(common??) process of it (sex).

like it’s a tardis, you can go through the normal pregnant symptoms but, like physically you’re fine and basically you’re like a visual timer for when the baby comes but, you’re purely morticia addams where you don’t even physically show in the stomach area.

what im saying is it’s a huge ship and here y’all ignoring looms are within the ship. when you can crack the loom egg when its been nine months and you got a floating baby in orange-y sac that has both the doctor’s and whomever they with’s dna.

like river is a huge glaring-punch-in-the-face hint that they most likely fucked w/o a condom more than once and the couple of times they thought they were pregnant, it wasn’t because of her side but of his (at the times) if they weren’t.

like she thought she was pregnant and the doctor was like: !!!!!!dope!!!!! and then they got all this stuff for babies and then river like half an hour later checks the monitor and the tardis is like: nah false alarm gurl u thought tho but river didn’t show the signs of miscarriage (due to being partially human since she was conceived in the tardis) so it’s just like really sad and she has to tell him that and the doctor tells her about pythia’s curse and its sad because she was never cursed but he was.

but explains a lot. 

it also explains why the doctor was not only happy but was going to burst into tears of joy for thinking that rose was pregnant by him. that all it took was to be in alternate universe for it to work. like yeah it was diminished but, that small second of him thinking she was pregnant with their kid, his kid, he looked ready to move into pete’s world because finally

finally

he can have children of his own

but now it was dashed and soon it became “does it need saying?”

now tentoo, because partially donna means partially human which means let’s have kids

so imagine all of that finally telling rose all of this and that’s why john tentoo tyler-noble proclaims it out loud to jackie his love of rose for understanding why he ends up hysterically sobbing at the sounds of his and rose’s firstborn child and even more so when they get another because he would he would assume once was just a miracle, a second one was just luck but the third?? the third would make him finally believe it. finally out of the curse finally. because the first time it would be assumed that he couldn’t have kids but when the second one comes, that second one was filled with donna’s selfdoubt due to her own attempts and that knowledge in his head and so now with a third, its just full blessed of being proved wrong time and time again

and then there’s the doctor who just slowly accepts that: yeah i can’t have/grant kids but, i will fight tooth and claw to protect everyone elses foster or otherwise.

bittersweet but yeah. assume that all the kids are loomed but you still get morning sickness and cravings and ankle swelling (it happens because of bondings and being human but your stomach doesn’t show any signs.  but you feel the kicks despite still having a flat stomach but it’s a mental projection from the loom

so, yeah just something that i realize

[cookiecrumbly98]

Headcannons for the butt twins and bet! Mostly bet

u dont like my headcannons, please dont say anything mean!)

Buttler:

Autistic

he litterally hates all the noises betrayus makes,

He hates that high pitched voice of his,

Regrets his desicion to ever work for him, and

Questions why did he ever join betrayus side on the first place

Secretly still helps pacman in his own

Hates the food in the nether world,

Kinda has a bit of a sensory issue with taste

Has PTSD nightmares

And

Anxious a bit

always has to use extra energy and it tires him out

Buttocks:

Once he builds a thing, he should finish it by the

Same day, cause sometimes he'd loose motivation

Has a tendency to say german slurs, german curse words,

And sometimes german words in an english sentence

by accident

Still kinda haunted that his arm was sliced off

(Yeouch)

Watches tap dancing online on break, or just plain bored

a bit of a savant when it comes to inventing,

when he meets a fellow scientist, he of course, gets jealous, but i like to think,

Hed also steal some ideas from them

Bonus! Betrayus:

betrayus also has Some Ptsd nightmares

Binge eats a ton when feeling depressed,

Sometimes it gets bad when the food tastes

Bad and he dosent care and he just keeps eating it

Had a couple of meltdowns/ breakdowns infront of the butt twins,land trus

Me, it was (a bit) destructive and depressing to see betrayus rant

And cry lava infront of them,

watches ping pong and sometimes imitates the movements on screen

Wears HIGH HEELS

Last thing,

He twirls around, to show of his nether skirt xD

I can imagine his mother not being really there for him tbh,

Like the times he needed her the most she isnt really there,,

Stratos was kind of there for him, buuut things went downhill

Almost everytime when he tried to help him

Betrayus is pansexual, he wont turn you down just because

Of some gender

Betrayus is way taller then stratos

I can imagine betrayus being a 6'ft tall

(Stratos in 5 ft)

Betrayus was always mistaken to be the older brother

When they didnt mentioned that stratos was older

Betrayus sometimes cries in his sleep

(;-;)

He kinds of craves for validation and love sometimes,

Buutt he.. doesnt make it work

Betrayus always wanted his mother atleast be proud of him (thats kinda cannon)

but everytime he tried his mom would always compare him to stratos, making

Betrayus feel like a failure

Betrayus wears heels if he had legs again

Remember when they said stratos and betrayus had another sibling? (Hint, ellie's a niece of stratos

And bet soo uhh yeah) I feel like only stratos gets most of the love, and the other two most likely

Never really got enough validation/ attention/love

Betrayus is always screaming inside

betrayus always wears eyeliner, and mascara and never takes them off

[laventadorn]

I know people 've complimented u on this b4, but I need to say it, too. I love how u emphasis Snape's ugliness. It goes to show how much of his personality is what I'm personally attracted to. However, maybe it's b/c of Rickman or that 1st impression JK gave of Snape in book 1, but his VOICE has always been a kink of mine. Lol. Snape is not a physically attractive man but he's got the most sinful voice ever! Can we see Harriet reacting to Snape's voice (one-shot maybe)?

why, thank you!

ETA: forgot to say, all of snape’s dialogue is taken from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Harriet filed into the DADA classroom, glancing around curiously to see what Snape had done to it. One of his favorite pastimes seemed to be using his surrounding space to project his personality; she couldn’t imagine him just letting any room alone, once it belonged to him.

And she was right. Snape had distinctly creeped up the place. Long, dark, heavy drapes blocked out all natural light; torches in the wall scones lengthened the shadows; and he’d even thrown up some revolting and disturbing pictures of people suffering in the grip of deadly curses. As the class shuffled into seats, they cast uneasy glances at the prints on the walls, contorting in the dim light. Nobody dared speak. Snape’s determination to wrong-foot and intimidate them from the minute they walked in was in full force, and it was working.

Really, Harriet thought with fondness as she looked at an inky sketch of a wizard shrieking in agony, which was decidedly unnerving Parvati, it was sort of… cute, the lengths he went to.

“I have not asked you to take out your books,” said Snape.

Several people jumped; Hermione hastily slid her copy of Confronting the Faceless back into her bag. Harriet’s heart gave a funny little flip as Snape closed the door with a soft echo that sounded ominous, even to her, and moved through the creeping shadows he’d created to stand behind his desk. 

As he faced them, she tried to keep her face from doing anything stupid. Snape was surveying them with a cold expression, contempt glimmering beneath like a shadow under water, the drape of black hair cutting sharp lines along his cheekbones. The compressed sneer was as familiar as a wave, and she had to look down at her desk to stop from smiling.

“You have had five teachers in this subject so far, I believe,” he said coldly.

Harriet concentrated on the wood grain in front of her. Had his voice always sounded that good? Sort of dark, smoky and silky at the same time; an almost palpable thing, as if it had texture…

“Naturally, these teachers will all have had their own methods and priorities. Given this confusion, I am surprised so many of you scraped an O.W.L. in this subject. I shall be even more surprised if all of you manage to keep up with the N.E.W.T. work, which will be much more advanced.”

He started walking in a circuit of the room around the edge. Unable to look away – perhaps from the hypnotic menace he projected – the class craned their necks or twitched in their seats to keep him in sight. A few students looked nervous as he swept behind them. Harriet decidedly did not feel nervous, though she certainly didn’t feel settled. 

“The Dark Arts,” said Snape, his voice dropping even lower, to a register that shouldn’t have been that clearly heard, yet alone so compelling, “are many, varied, ever-changing, and eternal. Fighting them is like fighting a many-headed monster, which, each time a neck is severed, sprouts a head even fiercer and cleverer than before. You are fighting that which is unfixed, mutating, indestructible.”

Harriet was glad the room was so dim; she was sure she was blushing. Now she knew why Parvati and Lavender were always giggling. A kind of embarrassed elation was pressing on her chest; her ears felt hot. Snape’s controlled prowl, the soft yet severe cadence of his voice – that bloody loving caress as he talked about the sodding Dark Arts – were making her feel extremely silly, and yet very much the opposite. Her eyes tracked the billow of his robes against the shadows, the dismissive sweep of his gaze that didn’t miss a trick. For a second, she thought he met her eye, and something electric shot across her skin.

“Your defenses,” he said, a little louder, making her wonder if he’d planned to sound so darkly admiring or not, “must therefore be as flexible and inventive as the Arts you seek to undo.”

Well, she thought, as she tried to pay attention to what he was saying to Parvati about Inferi, there was one good thing about having him for DADA: even if she got so frazzled by his bloody voice that she lost track of what he was saying, she would probably do well in Defense regardless.

[notconsolation]

hello Hannah !!! alright I need your help on something which kinda has a deadline but you really don't have to reply to this if you don't wanna ,,, it's all good ,,,, remember when we'd do song analysis. well I'm gonna ask your opinion, thoughts and feelings on bowie's sweet thing/candidate/reprise. it's for a design project and I'm trying to get as Many opinions as I can and honestly I just love hearing your thoughts and theories on music,,alright that's it love u hope u have a good day!!

Say no more i love this

this shall be mighty big and messy and long, just like the whole suite of songs

so

a primer on this trio of songs and on Diamond Dogs in general:

Bowie gave an interview where he said "I’d failed to obtain the theatrical rights from George Orwell’s widow for the book 1984 and having written three or more songs for it already, I did a fast about-face and recobbled the idea into Diamond Dogs: teen punks on rusty skates living on the roofs of the dystopian Hunger City; a post-apocalyptic landscape"

This is where the whole things plays out. I wouldn’t say ‘takes place’ because I think there’s actually deceptively little story in these songs. Or rather, the story plays out like a sweeping crane shot of a hellish cityscape that glides along with some people for a while but has no allegiance to any one of the characters we meet. I think that’s key because it emphasises this feeling that is present in the lyrics that nobody is on your side, whoever ‘you’ are in this city. I’ll be honest, the lyrics don’t make too much sense to me beyond the feelings they evoke, but I think that’s quite common with Bowie songs. I feel like some of the time he’s less concerned with telling stories than conveying emotions.

The lyrics emphasize key aspects, eg putting such emphasis on ‘scared’ and ‘lonely’ so early on helps set the tone. All the verbs or implications of action are full of anguish in the opening song (sweet thing): wrangle, scream, pain, trailing on a leash, run, break, steal, curse, bless. It’s a whirlwind that portrays this city which is broken through by this voice that almost seems to be coming from above in the chorus, promising 

“it’s a sweet thing, sweet thing/ if you want it … get it here/ Cause hope … is a cheap thing”

which seems such a tantalising contradiction wedged between these anguished verses

As for this horror-filled city, I want to mention that, in a way, it falls quite neatly into the English tradition of cities as hellish and nightmarish. You’ll find this in TS Eliot, in Joseph Conrad, in Thomas Hardy…. lots of it. They were obsessed with this view of cities as corrupt, sluggish, parasitic, leaching the people inside them of life and the land around them of colour… but the tradition goes back further than that actually, and it’s especially apparent in contrast to American horror tales. Think characters like Jack the Ripper vs the wendigo, or other American stories that explore our fear of the forest or of being isolated. Traditionally, urban legends focus on the horrors within us while rural ones focus on external ones. 

All this to say that even though Bowie always strove to break with tradition and upend expectations, in this he does fall into line with other people who imagined city nightmares and urban dystopias.

Actually calling it that might be going a bit far, though, because I think it’s definitely largely just routed in reality more than a dystopia.

ANyway.

About the sound of it.

It begins with this discordant rising of backwards tapes and jumbles that all sort of clang together until, almost by chance, it seems, they come together into a triumphant swell of a chord and begin the song proper, almost like it was waiting for the catalytic moment where all the ugliness clashes together into something that makes sense and sounds sweet.

Especially in Sweet Thing, there’s this way in which he extends certain words - not necessarily in a way that disagrees with their natural intonation, but in a way that tugs at the emotion behind it to stretch it out. He then bunches other phrases together, like it’s an aside, sort of, like he’s muttering them.

There is, as i find is typical of bowie, this wide array of voices that gives you the sense of things going on the background that you can’t quite hear. It makes all three songs busier than they should be, somehow, like something has been twisted or reversed in the background. 

The guitar helps with that, because it also has this twisted metallic taste to it, especially in the reprise. The guitar in Sweet Thing is fairly contained, albeit distorted, complementing the vocals rather than challenging them. When Candidate hits, the guitar becomes bolder in the mix and starts strangling out the vocals. They, in turn, become more desperate, like he’s trying to tell you something but time is running out. That’s also to be seen in the way the songs gradually speed up, almost imperceptibly at first. I think i didn’t really notice it the first time until that point where it suddenly gets super stripped down and its just the drums and a distorted guitar and you can really hear the drums gathering speed, but not in a way that feels hugely exponential, just in a way that your heart has just enough time to keep up and match the increasing speed in its rhythmic beating.

The transition to Candidate is interesting because there’s this high, soaring end to Sweet Thing that becomes an echo just shy of shrill and is perfectly complemented by this low, droning sax and bass that comes in to begin Candidate. The drum (snare i think?) that’s playing at the beginning of Candidate is also interesting. There’s something kind of military about it, and I read somewhere that Bowie told the drummer to imagine he was a french boy drumming a snare at the first execution with the guillotine or something. he went deep. Bowie invented method acting.

Candidate also starts with this tough-cool voice offering you something and it feels like the devil. Does that make sense? It feels like the devil offering you something in a back alley at 2am when you’re buzzing and you’re not sure if you know any humans.

Then during the Sweet Thing reprise the emotional emphasis about, oh idk, quadruples with the drums and the rolling discordant shivers of sound that echo out. And then that turns into this heavy almost driving beat with regular bass and twisted metal guitar over it and then your hearts in your throat and now it feels like its being strung through the strings of a harp.

It’s the sort of thing thats really scary when things seem less than real.

And there you have it. Sorry if that was really unstructured and long. I just…. my thoughts are messy and so is this song.

[s1xthhouse]

gwenkota 11, percabeth 20 bc i thrive on drama

[send me writing prompts using this]

ask and u shall recieve, drama hoe

11. things you said when you were drunk

For the first time in Gwen’s life, she had actually cut loose and let herself get roaring drunk. The senorio was perfect; Dakota invited people over to the little house he rented for a party, plenty of poisons and chasers and even a keg. Togas, plastic goblets, laurels, and very, very loud music. It was a classic rager and Gwen a thrown herself to it, letting the atmosphere lure her into drunkenness. As the host, Dakota made sure everyone was having fun, but he found himself playing games with Gwen the whole night; beer pong partners, mates during king’s cup, and just narrowly avoiding each other every turn of spin the bottle.

By 1 AM, the party had already hit its climax and people were either drunkenly walking home or had passed out somewhere in Dakota’s house, save for his room. If it wasn’t for the fact that the housing community in New Rome was small, people walking home would’ve seen questionable, but it gave the neighborhood police something to do if someone ended up streaking down the street. Despite all this, Gwen was still up and swaying slowly to the music playing, she was nursing a solo cup in hand. Dakota was pretty drunk, he was comfortable in his foggy headedness, it was enough for him to feel different and yet still conscious enough for him to get a head start cleaning.

“Can I help?” Gwen offered, but Dakota just waved it off, telling her to sit at the counter while he capped all the booze and threw out all the empty cups. They talked quietly in the kitchen, with Gwen still taking sips from whatever was in her cup. “Mm, I had a good time.” She sighed.

“Yeah?” Dakota tied a full garbage bag up “That’s a first.” Gwen stuck her tongue out. “I mean you don’t really let yourself have fun.” Dakota walked over to the counter she was sitting on, he leaned on his hand propped next to her, not quite leaning into her. He swayed a little in intoxication, but she was actually nodding off a little. “You’re a spectacular beer pong player.”

Gwen started to play with the laurel in Dakota’s hair, a big goofy smile on her face. Her freckles were drowning in her flushed face, her cheeks looking like fresh apples. Gwen was softly humming the song still playing on the stereo, and she wasn’t pulling her hand away from his face. “I think you should get some sleep.” Dakota suggested, before he let himself do something stupid. Gwen’s hand dropped. “You can sleep with me in my room.”

Gwen nodded, slipping down off the counter, stumbling a little into Dakota’s chest. She giggled, rattling his heart in the process. “Oh, I’ll sleep with you.” Dakota shook his head at her attempt at drunk flirting, chuckling slightly. Gwen finished her drink and walked with Dakota into his room, one of her hands absentmindedly played with his toga. A dark part of Dakota secretly loved this; he loved that Gwen was being open like this, that the drunk version of herself was flirty towards him. He would never take advantage of this, which is why his want to be intimate with her remained in his fantasies.

She flopped into Dakota’s half-made bed, her toga coming up to reveal the short-shorts she was wearing underneath the bed sheets. Dakota went back into the living room to turn off lights and the music, saying goodnight to some of the people passing out on the chairs and couches. Before going back into his room, he grabbed what was left of a handle of vodka. Gwen had settled herself into bed, she had taken off her laurel and put it on the bedside table, her red hair in a sort of tangled mess. Dakota sat up in bed, Gwen cuddling with his arm. Every now and then they would cuddle after a party, mostly because Dakota was very cuddly, but the shoe was on the other foot and Dakota suddenly didn’t know how to feel.

He took a swig from the handle, burning his mouth. If her drank enough he would pass out soon, he’d forget that his heart was beating fast because of Gwen. “Hey,” She mumbled. Dakota looked down at her, her eyes were closed but she still seemed to be awake. “I wisshed we hab kished duurin spbin th boddle.” She slurred, her face squished against the blankets. “You neber remmemm our kishes.”

What did that mean, he thought. When they were twelve they were each other’s first kiss, but that was just so they could say they had been kissed before. Since then, nothing. Gwen must’ve been talking about someone else, Dakota decided. There was no way in one of his stupors he had kissed Gwen… Dakota drank some more.

20. things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear

Percy was having yet another existential crisis, far more than he should be having in the span of one month. A normal person probably has one about three times in their life, Percy clearly was an outlier. With his mom pregnant, Percy found himself thinking a lot about his own future, which wasn’t something he should dwell on too much. Much of his life consisted of near death experiences, any demigod could relate, so the thought of thinking any further than the weekend was the last thing people like him should be thinking about.

Right now he just needed to get through school; his finals had kicked his ass, but he had done well enough in summer school that he could spend the next month and a half at camp. He didn’t want to think about Annabeth’s plans for them to go to university across the country, how at some point he had seen himself living in California for his whole life. That had been before his mom told him he was going to be a big brother, before he felt obligated to help his mom out despite her telling him it wasn’t necessary.

A buzz went off in Percy’s pocket, speak of the devil. “Hey, mom.” He answered. A while back, Leo had managed to invent a cell phone that was monster-tracking proof (within reason) and worked well within camp. The Iris Message was still the prefered mode of communication, but for practicality the lPhone worked better. He had just put his duffle bag under his bunk in Cabin 3, he sat down into the freshly made bed.

“Hi, Percy,” His mom greeted back. “I was just checking in, did you make it to camp alright?”

“Yeah,” He replied. “Argo’s bringing the car back now, I think.”

“I don’t know why you didn’t call to be picked up, you had to drive there yourself.”

“You know me, I like to make things harder on myself.” Sally sighed on the other line, Percy gave a half hearted smile to himself.  It was as if she saw it when she asked if he was alright. “Yeah,” he replied. “I just have a lot on my mind, nothing new.”

“You don’t want to talk about it?” His mom asked. “Is it about school?”

“Kind of,” Percy rubbed his face and sighed. “I was just thinking about Annabeth, what she wants to do in New Rome. It’s not like I don’t want to be with her, it’s just I did a lot of work to try and catch up with her and I feel like my brain is fried from all the studying I did. I just… I don’t know if I want to go to California and do it all over again, and to do it so far from home.”

Sally was quiet for a moment, but Percy could still hear the faint sound of her breathing. “I’ve never once thought about what I wanted to do with my life,” he continued. “Because I didn’t think I was going to have one, so many of my teachers just see me as a failure-”

“Percy,” Sally tried to console him, tell him it wasn’t true.

“In the past,” Percy corrected himself. “In the past, but I still think about it. No matter how much support I have between you and Annabeth I still doubt myself and I doubt this future she has planned for us.”

Again, Sally didn’t say anything, then a beat passed and she spoke: “I know you feel this pressure to make up your mind soon, especially since you’re going to be a senior, but you still have time to decide what you want to do with your life, Percy.”

Percy felt his heart clench with anxiety, he felt his mom didn’t understand, that she didn’t understand that he felt pressure from Annabeth more than anything. Percy loved Annabeth, he could see himself with her for a long time, but he also didn’t want their lives to start together immediately after high school.

“But I think you should talk to Annabeth about this,” His mom continued. “I know you think it will be the end of everything if you disagree on one thing, but she needs to hear how you feel. She doesn’t want to feel like she’s trapped you into this life that you don’t really want.” Percy felt himself choke up a little, all the stress from school and his mental turmoil had built up and released. He had to tell Annabeth, he had to own up to his insecurities.

“You’re right,” Percy sniffed. “Yeah, I gotta do that.”

“I have to go now,” Sally said. “But call me soon, okay?”

“Yeah.” He sighed, trying not to cry. A wave of catharsis had crashed on Percy, a feeling he only ever got from talking to his mom. “I love you, mom.”

“‘Love you, too.” Percy hung up, gently tossing his phone onto his pillow. Percy looked up for the first time since he answered the phone, and Annabeth was standing in the doorway to the cabin. The sight of her made his heart jump out of his chest in more ways than one; she was beautiful as always, but the question still stood: how long had she been standing there.

Percy’s head blanked from fear, he sighed every imaginable curse he could muster. Annabeth didn’t look angry, but her eyebrows were knitted together at the center, her mouth turned downwards slightly. Percy stood up and was about to go over to her but she beat him to it, she wrapped her arms around him tightly. Maybe she hadn’t heard him, Percy thought for a moment. If she hadn’t that would be a huge weight off his chest, but she would need to know sooner or later.

Annabeth looked up at him, her chin resting on his chest. Her grey eyes were filled with concern, almost glossy with tears herself. “I didn’t know you felt this way.” She said, nearly whispering. “I-I didn’t mean-”

“Annabeth,” Percy laid her head back down, his hand petting her blonde curls. “It’s not your fault your boyfriend is a pushover.” He felt her chuckle a little. Percy took a deep breath, a much needed deep breath. “I want you to know I haven’t been doubting your plans for a long time, I was just thinking about it recently.”

She stepped away a little, her arms still around him and his hand still cupped the side of her face. “I’m sorry,” Annabeth turned her head so she could kiss the inside of his hand. “I know you’ve worked really hard in school, and I don’t want you to do it just because I want you to.” Percy felt himself tear up again, and he kissed her.

Kissing Annabeth always felt right, there was no doubt about it. Her hands gripped the back of his shirt, and she leaned back into him. Percy then kissed the tip of her nose, and then under her eyes, and then her forehead, peppering her with little kisses, making Annabeth giggle a little. “Don’t worry,” he whispered. “I still have part of a year to get my shit together.”

[thoughteater]

Because we were talking about it earlier: Harry Potter! (And if you want to Septimus Heap since you're basically the only other person on this planet who has read those books)

Send me fandoms and I will tell you 5 things I would change about them

Okay but these are really hard because they were both important series in my childhood and you know… You never question childhood-books. (I also haven’t read these books in a while)As I’m wayy deeper in the HP-series and only just begun re-reading Magyk, I will take 2 points from Septimus and push them over to Harry Potter. Might add them to Septimus later, after finishing the books :)

HARRY POTTER (everything but Cursed Child, as you haven’t read that yet)

1 - [things about the movies]Okay, so, as many pointed out already, book-Ron is so much cooler than sidekick-Ron in the movies. But to add to that, there are some characters that should have had more depth. I know this is hard to do in movies, but Percy deserved so much better. Also, where was Peeves? Why don’t the producers know how werewolves look (srsly tho, Lupin-werewolf is horrible? Why did they make Cho tell Umbridge about Dumbledores Army? The potion-thing in book 1? And most of all, where was the nod at the end of the last movie between Harry and Malfoy? This was one of my favorite parts in the book and I feel like it was so important (who wants to talk about Cursed Child?), WHERE WAS IT?

2 - Neville as headmaster. We know he is professor at Hogwarts and even though I love McGonnagall but I don’t think she should be headmaster (2nd headmaster would be okay tho). And Neville would be so good at this! He’s way different than Dumbledore in sense of manipulating people (let’s face it, he wouldn’t) and he is kind. Also, how great would it be to see the boy that everyone laughed at to become headmaster of Hogwarts? Yeah, sure, he’s also kinda the chosen one (that’s a theory for another day tho), but he’s still seen as a looser. Show them, Neville!

3 - More magical places. We only really know Hogwarts, Hogsmeat, Diagon Alley and the Ministry of Magic (and we can guess stuff about 2 other schools, but that doesn’t really count). But after reading and/or seeing (well um, no. Reading. Should have added that to 1.) about the Quidditch World Championship I would have LOVED to visit more magical places. In the last book the Golden Trio could have visited some, so I would change that. And tbh - small Cursed Child spoiler - the magical nursery home was the greatest thing ever invented, so yes, more of that please.

4 - Why is it Albus Severus, why not Cedric or something. And yes, I know this one is pretty boring, but besides the point that I wouldn’t change really important stuff bc it would change the plot, but it always bothered me. He wasn’t brave or good. None of them were. I get ‘Albus’ tho, bc of the father figure, but like, Sirius was real, bro.

5 - Magic, strong and weak, and also Squibs. I have feels about Squibs. Why can’t they go to Hogwarts? Imagine Harry or Hermione would have been Squibs. It would have been impossible for them to learn anything about magic. But besides that, why aren’t there really strong and weak witches and wizards? Yeah, sure, we know there are some more talented than others like Ginny and Hermione, but I would have loved to see more wizards and witches that maybe just can move small things and that’s it. Or people who just can’t do some certain kinds of spells. Or a Lumos that is stronger, because the persons magic is stronger. In the books it felt a lot like “If you study enough, you can do it!” and even though that is a great message, it would have been even greater to see people being way better or way worse than others in certain magical things. I think the movies did better here?

6 - The point system. How is it possible that a single teacher can punish pupils so easily? In our time in Hogwarts it has often been Snape who was really, well, unfair, but it just shouldn’t be so simple to give and take points. “Oh, your my favourite, just take these 20 points from Hufflepuff, because I hate them!” - yeah great. Also like. Look at what Dumbledore did at the end of almost every school year. Wtf tho. And do we really need that competition if it’s only up to who the teachers like? I don’t think so. Talking about the houses, I would also add that it would have been great to see people outside of Gryffindor. Yeah, we have Luna and Cedric and Cho, but most of the people don’t matter at all and that is really sad?

7 - You might hate me for this, but I HATED the explanation of “Your mother’s love protects you, Harry!”. Yeah, great, it’s magic, but I just would have wished for a more logical explanation than just this? This was so much fairytale and so little Harry Potter.

SEPTIMUS HEAP (as said, haven’t read that one in a while and it was perfect, probably)

1 - The German bookcovers. I love them. But the names on the book spines don’t look in the same direction? Like the first three are ok but then some if them are standing on their head and I hate it? (u know what I mean, how to explain?)

2 - Septimus Heap was declared Extraordinary Wizard way too early. No more to say about that. But do you know how YOUNG he was? I never thought it fitted well.

3 - Yes. It is a childrens book. And I love how it’s written. And the magic system and how everything is alive. But - and to add something to what I said before - some more explanations of the magic in this world would have been great. And not only that, but everything could have been described a little less fast. I don’t need details Lord Of The Ring style, and I see why she wrote it that way (childrens book, as said), but sometimes things don’t need to happen fast. (Does this make sense? Idk. None of this makes sense, probably, idc)

[1facebookporn-blog]

Ohhhh 

- I fell ill.  Whatever  (STAY. OUT. OF. BOSTON.) wELLLL, f (Camera got it -- ( Sure - No United States . 

mmmmmm ...-

You know -- With Geiger and everything 

Hey ,

[... but hes looking at Israel .  Case Closed. ]

A Plane Dissappeared on its way to Hawaii, going to or from Malaysia, Flight 251

---- you would do WHAT 

_________________ & I Do Knight people . ... - Whenever the Fuck I feel ike it . 

..

The Bi-Pukklll

- I Invented 4 padf.  Y oure not out of business .

None, whatsoever, actually . 

Wellll, then weve fucked.  Identical ? 

Oh.  More horrible shit about Reece . 

--- Im gonna go ahead, and, Personally, Stay away from EVERYONE. -- You’ve going to forget that we were ever Aquained, becuase, aside from Providing an Impossibly-Even place to begin, we are 0.  That said, I think your practices are Intriguing, but Barbaric.  I dont really know what they are, but, they Do invade the Sidewalk. ... -- I hate the Constituation as much as Anyone (Beat Women.), but, --- I just got lost .  -- Maybe then its not the constitution . 

Oh nevermind.  You’re a Halfie . 

DO I ?? 

-- Its actually Impossible to FEEL anything about the Constituion, which makes is Remarkable.  Contrarily, it is ALSZO likewise Impossible to Not-Feel something about Rodef. . ....

Sooo --- the only thing we’re missing is the 1900s . Or not.

9-11 ??

New age. 

Hate you, and, I have to become a Girl because Im radioactive, Psychic, EXTROIDANARILY Well-Trained, FULL of Hate, Spiritually Armed, Never lost an arumgned (1 stalemate.) , &, am actually pretty nice at Anyone .  My PERSONAL life, is / was such a mess, I , became a Whore, to escape it, and, that much is done (Nothin ne w to me . ) -- eW.  

.

So - whie we wait for the Antichist to Die, Im gonna be Dying parts of me black, trying to convince myself to commit suicied.  Onces thats ocer 

Americna,s -- Freedom is EXPERIENCED . ..

Freedom is not Contained

Freedom does not Need justice 

Freedom doesnt complain 

KIDDING !’

GOSH -- Who DOENST love GMOS  (We even hate that . .. yaaa....(

We . 

-I ctualy think Im incapable of Learning anything in this state, as, there is absoloutley nothing to look forward to, thus, absoloutely nothing to prepare for.  My, Timing, is the Basis of International Peace, so ---

So it was some major, major spy shit and im the kick can that just fell off the bridge and everony has to shit . 

-------

No.  You don’t under stnat ... I think, I’M UGLY . 

No, like, In my Heart, Ugly.  .... Like, 

So, everything i Do, now, then *(That ive , Successfuly eaten every Aura Ever.) - is off that core.  And, its Trippel x Evil till October. And I dont know what happens then -- Some shitty curse shit . ----  So -- yo-- I need a Specific KIND and WAY of Medication, which is Strictyl prohibited in the States, for some reason dealith with Men , sacrificing Rights, as a way of Way. .. And so on (Which, is so Incredibly Aggribationg.) --- so 

For me -- It deals with Refractions.  so -- I have that Hot Hate core, and then, its nothing but Cold till you get to my new girl tits.  Once that happens, im a little latex chew toy, not play thing. .. I dont know how to play.  I know how to Fuck once i Want it . 

Since you all now know me, and everything I’m EVER going to be (Which, ended, I guess... more than a few times, but not past today._ --then I have no need to really Speak, or interject anything, 

or Posit.  Or make Due.  none of it.  So, INSTINCT, is Completly gone, all that, Perfect-Relationship, Fine-Tuning, Ambient-Gesture, Total-HOrrid-Self-Tortuet ... allll of that , in Fruition, is Gone . -- For, Literally nothing, I may add. 

.. Imagine a great Red-Wood Tree, and then , Cut it over . And then - onces is dead and bleeding, imagine alllll the people you were Soooo incredibly nice to for NOOOO reason at all, just sitting here , laughing, hating you, because theyre fucking ignoret, worthless, stupid. tub-fucks. 

So - Mistakes ????

Keep Having None . (The other one was in your Left leg, about the size of a Dime . _ ..

So, hey -- HEy You -- You make the The Call ---

Hows That aint American 

Oh - Yes -- The Women .. Wha t DID i doe for them (They cant remember ... )

I. Became. The Ugliest. Girl. In The WOrled. 

-- You-- Silvio -- Your Rat-Trap fucking STINKS .

__________

-Im a ZBlamed Cunt (How, Herioc [[ya, that.  My dream, as a child, actually fucking Happened. 

.

-- Ummmmm -- I was 3 -6 whien all this REALLY started affecting me 

Ya, Its like being Canned

----

-& they just sat there and Lied .  (Operation Beareded-Lady already happened.  Theres no room in the matrix.)

Nahhh , Im just Being bad . _______________ Good.  So, Armageddon AND The Apolcymse (WITH the Rapture), is Over for everone but Blue, and Blue, Ever waking moment, Every Sleeping Moment, for the rest of his life, will do nothing but re live , rexpence them ... and never be able to go beyond them, For anything . 

- Thanks U (PS -0 the Antichrist’s Last worrds are like a 1/3 ball from the Roof (he called the essays “Gorgeous” , baby ) , retreating, saying, “Im So Gross” --- -- Ya a Rabbi punched him out acroos the gap (He was tall enough”, in the gap, someone capped him, and the Bomb blew away the Antichst, and blue buried himself by falling into the gap. )

Ya - It was in the Passport, that punched thogh EVERYTHING, INTACT, and fell to the ground, in front a oc Cop, who, somehow scrambled to pick it up.  YOUR new name (Sorrt is tn memla00) -- Is 

Blue (blue wont be handing anyhting out anymore guys . blue will be, “Spooning” . )

Protesting ?

Both The Witness Protection Agency AND “Undercover” ANYTHING .  Say It 

- The only people I still have respect for are thoes whom Appropriatly Fought me, according to the termms of Loigic, not Ruin .  (-- its True -- its MOSTLY true, its AWAY-Fals, )