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lothris · 4 months ago

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LARA LEOPOLD CHARACTER FORM

"a younger, daintier, somehow meaner version of you." — Deadpool to Wolverine: the Original on Wolverine: the Remix

OVERVIEW

FULL NAME: Lara Sarah Leopold CURRENT ALIAS: Wolverine, Baby Wolverine, Mini-Wolverine NICKNAMES: Mini-Me, Mini-Wolvie, Baby Wolvie, The Baby ADDITIONAL ALIASES: X-23 (hates being called this)

BIRTHDAY: Mar 3, 2010 GENDER: Female SEXUALITY: Bisexual PRONOUNS: She/Her

CITIZENSHIP: Canadian SPECIES: Homo Superior (Mutant), Homo Simulacrum (Clone) AFFILIATION: Facility X and US Government (unwillingly), X-Men BASE OF OPERATIONS: Facility X (formerly, and imprisoned there), X-Mansion (formerly), Leopold Estate (current)

APPEARANCE & PHYSICALITY

ETHNICITY: White Latin American ACCENT: Mix of Latin American Spanish and Standard Canadian DOMINANT HAND: Right, trained to freely use both hands HAIR: Black EYES: Brown

BODY: Small and dangerous, she has some muscle definition, but is rather short and slender, especially when compared to her father, from whom she was partially cloned. However, like him, Lara weights more than she looks, as her skeleton is infused with an Adamantium-Vibranium alloy.

UNUSUAL FEATURES: Retractable bone claws, Metal Skeleton

STYLE: A weird mix of her dad's and sisters, kinda grunge or 90's canada if you want to put a name on it, she doesn't dress up much, going for the basic jeans and shirt look, and flexibility for all the screaming and running

FACECLAIM: Dafne Keen

PERSONALITY

Smol and vicious, Lara is very similar to her father, when she speaks, it's generally only to say something mean, and like him, all the gruff, tough attitude, is just covering a soft centre that is stupidly kind and wants to help people. Having grown up as a lab rat, Lara is very slow to trust others, and in her younger days, was more like a hedgehog, her spikes always up and trusting no one but her family, and even there it was just temporary truce type trust as opposed to the real trust she has with them now. Although she's lived free from the Facility for years now, she still has some flashbacks and ptsd symptoms from back then, suffering from nightmares and occasional panic attacks. She would initially repeatedly cut herself with her claws, but has stopped doing that now and has better coping mechanisms, such as snapping a wristband instead.

While she's not as quick to anger as she was when she was little, Lara still has a short temper, and will slice you open if you get on her nerves. While she's small and adorable, as another Wolverine with scary metal claws and a double digit body count since she was like 10, she instills fear in most of the others at the Mansion and the Estate. They're less scared of her now, but she's still fairly initimidating, it's only her immediate circle that find her too cute for this world.

POWERS & ABILITIES

Regenerative Healing Factor (which in turn also grants her Contaminant Immunity, Fatigue Resistence, Decelerated Aging, and Telepathic Resistance), Superhuman Acute Senses, Superhuman Strength, Agility, Speed, and Endurance, and like her father, retractable bone claws. Lara has four claws in her arms, two on each hand, and one claw in each foot. Lara's skeleton was infused with an Adamantium-Vibranium alloy that is intended to grow with her. Due to her healing abilities, she is functionally immortal. While she has the same healing as her father, she is slightly less durable in battle due to her different skeleton, and can be immobilized for longer.

Although she has a similar berserker fury and screams when fighting, it's not to the same extent as her father, and doesn't have all those animalistic traits, but her senses are just as, if not more, acute.

She does similarly pick up languages very easily, and is a polygot as well. She started with Spanish and English, and has since picked up French, German, Japanese, and Farsi.

She has been trained in various forms of combat, with a specialty in assassination techniques. Since leaving Facility X, her fighting style has evolved, now more evocative of her father, rushing in head first and slashing everything, but her murder skills have also been further refined by her brother, and she is less self-reliant in a battle, and better at team dynamics. Damian has noted that she could defeat the entirety of the League, aside from him, fairly easily in combat.

RELATIONSHIPS

FAMILY

Jonah, Gideon, Rebecca, Delilah, Rico, Gabriella, James, Charles, Ophelia, Eris, William, Raven, Amelia, Zelda, Elias, Victor, Heather, Avery, Claire, Freddy, Hudson, Bella.

Lara was raised in a Facility with 22 preceding clone siblings, herself being the 23rd and final child clone. With the completion of X-24, the Facility began to "decommission" (in other words, kill) the children, but were unable to kill Lara, who fully inherited the Wolverine's healing factor. She still has nightmares about them and repeats their names in stressful situations to ground herself.

Dr Sarah Hudson

One of the doctors involved in the Facility X experiments, she was the only one who treated the children humanely and tried to help them escape multiple times, thus Lara in particular remembers her fondly. It was her who sent the information regarding Facility X and the clones to the X-Men, which led to the subsequent destruction of the Facility. She ultimately died during their mission, but was successful in saving Lara. While it's noted in the files, Lara herself is unaware that Dr Hudson provided the rest of Lara's genetic material that did not come from the Wolverine, making her, her genetic mother. Even without this information, Lara choose her middle name in Sarah's honour.

Luthor Leopold, Damian Mirza, Freya Sieger

Since being taken in by the X-Men, Lara has slowly developed a familial relationship with her genetic father, and his existing children, Damian and Freya. She is closer to Freya than Damian, who lives with them, but does message Damian in the family group chat. It took time to open up emotionally, but she otherwise entirely relied on them when she first arrived to the manor, since she could trust them as "family", while everyone else was a stranger. She was initially closest with Freya, who could use her powers to help keep Lara calm and help her sleep at night. Long past the early days, Lara is now very close with her family, and protective of them, and dislikes being the one protected, though is told to suck it up and enjoy it, since that's her privilege as the youngest.

FRIENDSHIPS

Since the initial awkwardness and mayhem of the US Army invasion of X-Mansion have passed, Lara gets along better with the other children of the Mansion, there was an initial misconception and blame regarding the invasion placed on her, but it wasn't true anyway, and it's sort of hard to bully the Wolverine's daughter, and the Scarlet Witch's sister. With all of that now in the past, she's generally friendly with the others, but for the most part spends time with her sister and her friends, ie the older students. Outside of them, Gigi could be considered her bestie.

She was close to Professor X during the short time they spent together, and enjoyed playing chess with him.

ROMANCE

Lara is bisexual and has expressed attraction to men and women, however she is not allowed to date because she's a baby. Anyone who tries to flirt with her is scared/threatened away by one of her family members. However, despite that, when Lara wants to go on a date, she can, it's just her little date that gets bullied. So she has had her first kiss and such, just nothing more than passing teen moments.

Chelsea Hamilton

TBA.

HISTORY

Lara was born and raised in the Essex Corporations' Facility X, alongside 22 additional partial clones of Luthor Leopold, better known as The Wolverine. As partial clones, Lara and her siblings all had traits of the Wolverine, alongside whatever else each subsequent experiment tossed into the mix, in Lara's case, it was a regular human and one of the doctors overseeing the experiments, Dr Sarah Hudson. Despite Dr Husdon's best efforts to protect the children, and her attempts to help them escape, Facility X decided to "decommission" all of them once they completed X-24, an adult near-identical clone of the Wolverine. While they succeeded with everyone else, Lara kept regenerating like her father. The repeated attempts have left with her numerous nightmares and PTSD, resulting in various self-harm tendencies and extreme recklessness with herself, like walking right into fire and even water, where she is physically unable to swim due to the added weight of her metal skeleton. Since leaving, she's worked through most of it, but still has occasional nightmares, and panic attacks.

By the time she was 9, after countless attempts and failures at decommissioning Lara, those in charge at Facility X decided to instead redo the metal-bone infusion done on Wolverine decades prior, this time with an alloy, to ensure that her bones grow with her. At the same time, Dr Hudson was finally able to contact the X-Men and alert them to Facility X's activities. Unfortunately, they did not arrive in time to stop the metallization of Lara's skeleton, and Dr Hudson died in the crossfire.

Things were very awkward initially when she arrived at X-Mansion. She would not communicate verbally at all and spoke to telepaths who approached, though not all. She quickly shut most of them out too,

TRIVIA

although she is his clone, instead of Luthor's hazel eyes, according to him, she inherited her genetic grandmother's brown eyes

completely misused young people slang until more recently when she befriended Gianna, she just blindly trusted her family's explanation of terms (the 200 wolverine, 80 year old daken, and the introverted witch)

because of the added body weight from her metal skeleton, Lara sinks in water, she is arguably more buoyant than her father, due to hers also utilizing vibraninium as opposed to just adamantium, but she ultimately still sinks. because of this, she avoids large bodies of water.

#terra xtant #audition #writing #mine #graphics #edits #lara leopold

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babygirlizz · 4 years ago

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izzie’s favorite movies and tv shows of 2020 (aka the worst year ever)

another year, another movie and tv show review. this year has, to put it simply, sucked. 2020 has been so terribly awful that sometimes the only light you can see are the absolute bangers of movies and tv shows that came out this year. with that being said, some of the movies and tv shows didn't come out in 2020. if the are mentioned in this post it is because they either: had a season come out this year, i found them this year, or they became popular this year.

SPOILERS: it may not come as a surprise but just in case you didn't realize, there will be many spoilers ahead, read at your own risk.

tw // death, suicide, drug use, mild adult language. if any of these things might trigger you, i strongly urge you not to read this post.

there is no specific order of these shows and movies, i'm just writing as they come to mind. if you enjoy any of these movies or tv shows, or if you have any suggestions for me, please let me know!

TV SHOWS

1) Santa Clarita Diet

Okay, so I know this show doesn't have anything to do with 2020. But, I found this show in 2020. I put it off for a while, thinking it wasn't my style of a show, but boy was I wrong. I loved this show. Sheila Hammond (Drew Barrymore) is a normal suburban wife and mom. She is a real estate agent with her husband Joel (Timothy Olyphant). She struggles with the fact that she isn't very adventurous. This all changes when she throws up an insane amount at a house showing. She then finds herself craving adventure, and craving human flesh. Yeah, she's a zombie. Not only is this show super hilarious, but it also shows the growth that they have with their characters and their family. I'm also team Abby (Liv Hewson) and Eric (Skyler Gisondo).

2) Outer Banks

So, I'm from NC. And, watching this show at first bothered me because I can very obviously tell this show isn't actually filmed in the obx, and the geography isn't exact, but once I got past that, I loved it. John B (Chase Stokes) is a teenager that lives in the poor side of the outer banks. He has a friend group called the Pogues which consists of JJ (Rudy Pankow), Pope (Jonathan Daviss), and Kie (Madison Bailey). They absolutely hate the Kooks, which are the rich kids. A while after John B's dad gets lost at sea, presumed dead, the group finds some evidence that may solve the mystery, and make them rich. In the process, John B falls in love with a Kook names Sarah (Madelyn Cline) whose father Ward (Charles Esten) may have a little more to do with the mystery than he let on. Through friendship, murder, and secrets, the gang may just figure out what happened to John B's dad.

3) Love, Victor

Alright. I loved loved loved Love, Simon. I also really loved the book "Simon vs. the Homosapien Agenda." So, when I heard about this show, I was so excited. Victor (Michael Cimino) is a teenage boy that moved to Creekwood with his family. He meets Felix (Anthony Turpel) who lives in his building. He also meets Mia (Rachel Hilson) and they begin dating. But, he also meets Benji (George Sear). While trying to get used to a new school, new friends, and a new relationship, Victor finds himself questioning his sexuality. With the help of Simon (Nick Robinson) and his friends, Victor finds it in himself to finally come out, and he admits his feelings, for Benji. This is such a good show, but I was so upset when season 1 ended on a cliff-hanger.

4) The Haunting of Bly Manor

The sequel to The Haunting of Hill House. Now listen, haunting of hill house was an absolute banger. When I saw that Bly came out I nearly died. I was so excited. But, I was alone in my apartment and also a lil bitch. So, I had to wait a week until I was home with my family to watch it. Now, I was so excited to be scared, and there were a few jump scares and ominous moments, but this season was more centered around the story line of Dani Clayton (Victoria Pedretti) and her new life in a foreign country. When seeing an ad for a live in job as an au pair. When she gets there, she meets the two young children she’ll be looking out for and the other workers of the house, including the gardener, Jamie (Amelia Eve). Throughout her stay at Bly she begins to notice weird behaviors from both children and by the end of the series she sacrifices herself for the children. Sadly, this story is being told by Jamie who Dani had fallen in love with during her stay at Bly. Now I was somewhat upset about the lack of horror, but was still very intrigued and drawn in by this series.

5) Julie and the Phantoms

Alright, at first I was not gonna watch this show. I thought it looked a little too young and childish for me, but everyone was talking about it on twitter so I had to. I. Love. This. Show. This show centers around Julie (Madison Reyes). Julie is a teenage girl who, sadly, lost her mother. The one major thing she shared with her mom, was their love for music. Since her mothers passing, she gave up music. This is until, dead musicians from the 90′s show up in her garage. Luke (Charlie Gillespie), Alex (Owen Joyner), and Reggie (Jeremy Shada) all tragically passed away in the 90′s after eating bad street hotdogs. When Julie finds their CD in her garage, she decides to play it and they come back in ghost form. But, only she can see them. With their help, she finds her confidence to play music again. Also, she has to find away for them to stay because they’re slowly disappearing.

6) Derry Girls

Bitch. I love this show. And yeah it didn’t come out in 2020. Shut up. I found this show recently after watching the cast on the holiday special of the Great British Baking Show. I loved the actors so I had to watch the show. This show focuses on Erin (Saoirse-Monica Jackson) a 16 year old girl that lives in Derry, Northern Ireland in the 90′s. Alongside her is her cousin Orla (Louisa Harland), her two friends Clare (Nicola Coughlan) and Michelle (Jamie-Lee O’Donnell), and Michelle’s English cousin James (Dylan Llewellyn). During these years, a lot of people in Ireland struggled, especially because it was during wartime. Even thought this show isn’t focused heavily around the war, it’s amazing to see these teens live a fulfilling life while struggling with the state of their country, and the lack of money that their families have.

7) Elite

HA. This show did have a season in 2020 so leave me alone. But bro, I love this show. At first, I didn’t watch it because I thought I could only watch the dubbed version in English, which I hate. I hate dubbed shows they look so weird. But, once I found out I could watch this show in Spanish, I fell in love. But, sadly, theres too damn much to talk about in one little post. It’s crazy. But basically it just follows the lives of teens in high school that are trying to survive. And no, not in the “I’m surviving high school,” sense. No, people be getting murdered.

MOVIES (tbh i didn’t find a lot of movies good this year lmk which movies u liked this year and maybe i’ll like them!)

1) All the Bright Places

After the death of her sister, Violet (Elle Fanning) is devastated. She closes herself off, and has her parents get her out of doing school work that involves working with others. But, as time goes on, they realize she may need to start to move on. Violet then meets Finch (Justice Smith) who is enamored by Violet. He suggests they do a project together. While finding and visiting some of the smallest wonders of their state, they begin to fall for each other. While you are focusing on Violet and her mental health, you tend to miss some of the signs that Finch’s mental health isn’t great either, but by the time you do, it could be too late.

2) Dangerous Lies

Hmm. This was weird for me. I had only ever seen Camila Mendes in Riverdale, and honestly, not a fan. So, Katie (Camila Mendes) and her husband Adam (Jessie T. Usher) are struggling with money. Katie decides to take a job working for an elderly man, and eventually gets her husband hired there as well. Unfortunately, he dies, but for some odd reason, leaves the house and all of his fortune, to Katie. As they get comfortable in the house, they begin to uncover some very weird and dangerous lies.

3) The Devil All the Time

Ok. Iconic. You got so many hot men in this movie. Bill Skarsgård, Sebastian Stan, Tom Holland, Robert Pattinson. C’mon now. That’s crazy. But, this story is so long and in depth that I wouldn’t even know where to begin. This movie is a bit disturbing. It involves murder, sexual assault, killing of animals, and so much more so if that’s an issue for you please do not watch this movie. It was also quite long, but it was still good.

4) After We Collided

Okay just listen. I was that teenager. I read wattpad stories and was, embarrassingly, addicted to After. This was not a great movie per say, but it was After. This is a sequel to the movie After. This movie centers around Tessa (Josephine Langford) and her recovery after her breakup with Hardin (Hero Fiennes Tiffin). Theres sex, alcohol, bad acting. The whole nine-yards. But c’mon, they’re so cute together.

5) To All the Boys p.s. I Still Love You

Okay it was a good movie. I enjoyed it. This movie focuses on Lara Jean (Lana Condor) and her boyfriend Peter (Noah Centineo) and their relationship post the first movie. But of course relationships aren’t super steady, and John Ambrose McClaren (Jordan Fisher) shows up. Yeah, John Ambrose, from her letter. They become closer and Lara Jean has to decide who she wants to be with. Spoiler, it’s Peter. BOOOOOOO justice for John Ambrose McClaren, he deserved better.

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lovelucybradford · 4 years ago

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I Pretend You’re Mine-2

Chapter Two: We Learn to Live with the Pain (Mosaic Broken Hearts)

Masterlist

A/N: Thanks so much for all of your support on Chapter One. I’m so excited that you love it as much as I do! Please let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list for this story. Also, not sure how I feel about this one. Be warned: I hate Jennifer Blake.

Derek and Rose’s ‘engagement’ was supposed to stay a secret between the four of them. So, naturally, all of her friends knew about it. Even if she tried (and she really, really wanted to) Rosalie couldn’t push the thought of the upcoming ruse to the back of her mind. Her friends wouldn’t let her.

It started out innocently enough. A ‘Hey Rosie, Derek looks hot, don’t you think’ here or a ‘Friends to lovers is the best, right Rosalie’ there. Rosalie was used to it. Ever since she returned to Beacon Hills and became close with all of Lydia’s friends, who had somehow become Derek’s in the span of years, they’d been relentless with their teasing of Derek and her.

The joking she could handle.

It was when they used Rosalie’s feelings for Derek for their own amusement that it really started to bug her.

Wednesday had been the day from hell. It all started in Rosalie’s first period class. One of her more bold students, captain of the lacrosse team, had greeted her not with his normal, ‘What up, Miss H?’. No, the boy strutted right in, stopped at her desk, and said, ‘How’s it going, Mrs. Hale?’ with a shit-eating grin. Alex Layhue was normally the last to arrive to class, right before the late bell rang, so, of course, all of Rose’s other students had heard him. And began to refer to her as Mrs. Hale. Which had spread like wildfire, and then all of the kids called Rosalie by Derek’s surname.

It only stopped once she’d threatened detention. By the time eighth period was over, Rosalie was fuming and ready to stomp right out onto the lacrosse field to give her good friend, Assistant Lacrosse Coach Scott McCall, a piece of her mind. Instead, Rosalie raced out the door as soon as she was allowed to leave, forgoing her normal after-school visit to Derek’s classroom.

Rosalie’d reached her apartment, eternally thankful that the shitshow was over, when she had spotted it: a poorly taped rose on the front door, with a sign next to it. A rather crude sign.

Congrats on the D(erek). Love, Isaac. The words were bad enough. Isaac had to go and include a rather accurate drawing of Derek as a, um, d.

She had ripped the sign off the front door, threw it into the wastebasket under the kitchen sink, then punched the damned thing a few more times for good measure.

Then, Rose had called and screamed at Isaac. She couldn’t remember what was said in her anger, but Rosalie knew that a few choice words were thrown in, along with ‘obscene’, ‘tasteless’ and ‘terrible friend’.

Isaac showed up at the woman’s front door an hour after the ‘conversation’ holding a bottle of wine in one hand and takeout in another, a guilty smile on his face. Rosalie forgave him. Eventually.

That night, she’d had a very vivid dream about Derek’s dick. Rosalie woke up the next morning, covered in sweat, and knew that if she saw Derek she would spontaneously combust, and, well, other things that she didn’t want to even ponder.

So, Rosalie spent the rest of the week eating lunch in her car, leaving right after the final bell, and basically avoiding her best friend at all costs.

Until today. Rosalie had been waiting all week to watch this movie, and she would be damned if the deafening bang of construction across the street from her apartment building would keep her from Peter Kavinsky.

The door to the loft slid open, and Derek sauntered in, hands full with grocery bags. He paused at the sight of Rosalie, his face contorted in disgust.

“Get that shit off my TV!” he grumbled.

Rosalie paused the movie, looking up at him with a sharp glare. “It is not shit, Derek Sebastian Hale. It is romance. You wouldn’t know romance if it bit you in the ass.”

Derek scoffed. “Oh yeah? Remember, my senior year, when I showed up in front of my ex’s house all John Hughes-like and quoted Shakespeare at her like a total douche?”

“Mmm, yeah. And that went over swimmingly, didn’t it, Romeo? I specifically remember having to clean the cut on your forehead from the rock that she threw at you.” Rosalie snorted.

Derek ignored her, hauling the bags into the kitchen and shoving items into cabinets. Rose joined him, grabbing a bag of refrigerated foods. As she pulled out the milk, a slip of paper flittered to the ground. She reached down to grab it, stopping short when she found that a phone number was written on the back of the receipt.

“Elena Soto gave you her phone number?” Rosalie asked Derek.

Damn. Rosalie suspected that Elena was after Derek since the day that the new Spanish teacher started at BHHS. Two weeks ago. Girl had game, Rosalie gave her that.

Derek put down the box of noodles in his hand and scratched the back of his neck, looking everywhere but at his friend. Rosalie could see a hint of pink on his cheekbones and wondered if the man had actually gotten a sunburn after years of making fun of her for her lobster-tone skin in the summertime.

“Yeah. She, uh, asked me out to dinner next Saturday night.”

Rosalie straightened herself back up and busied with putting food in the fridge. She feigned nonchalance, asking, “And what did you say?”

“I told her thank you, but I’ll be in Hawaii… with you.”

The woman hid her smug smile in the inside of the refrigerator. Serves Elena right. “I thought you’d forgotten. Since you haven’t, you know, even brought it up since Disneyland.”

“I didn’t forget. And it’s not like you brought it up, either.”

True. Rosalie was avoiding that discussion like the plague. She knew that she’d be able to pull of fake fiancée. She’d had feelings for Derek that were successfully repressed since she was sixteen. But Derek… he’d made it very clear that he felt nothing more than familial love towards Rosalie. How could he convincingly play madly in love with her?

“I’m sorry I cockblocked your hot date with Senorita Soto,” Rose confessed, tone sounding more harsh than intended.

“Rosalie.”

She pulled her head out of the fridge and shut the door. The BB-8 magnet her niece bought him at Disney was displayed proudly towards the top. Rosalie studied it as an excuse to not look at Derek, lest he catch onto her jealousy.

She was losing her touch. Rosalie had built an excellent poker face over the years, and she let her friends’ suggestions and one bold woman break it. Rose had to up her game.

“Rosalie, you know I didn’t mean it like that. It’s why I didn’t bring Elena up. You’re my best friend. You know I’d do anything for you.”

Rosalie smiled deviously up at him, all thoughts of Elena Soto gone and replaced again with Peter Kavinsky. “Does that include watching my romcom?”

Derek rolled his eyes with a playful smile. He eventually gave in after Rose told him she would buy them a pizza.

___________

Rosalie tried to enjoy the movie, but one thought plagued her mind like some annoyingly catchy song.

Fake dating contract. It was so cringey she didn’t want to bring it up. But she did anyways.

“Hey Derek? This sounds so stupid, but since you and I are two adults playing pretend, don’t you think you and I should, you know, come up with rules for our charade?” Rosalie shoved pizza in her face to distract herself from any comment that would come next.

Derek laughed. “Yeah, ok, Lara Jean Comey.”

“It’s Covey, not Comey… and I’m serious, Der. You and I have both been shit on by our significant others. Don’t you think it would be good for us to come up with some kind of guidelines, so this doesn’t get out of hand and neither of us get hurt?”

Derek sighed, putting his plate down on the coffee table and giving Rosalie his full attention. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

Rosalie bit her lip, thinking. When she came up with nothing, she asked, “Do you have any dealbreakers?”

“I’m not making Drew jealous,” he swiftly announced.

Rosalie’s eyes shot up to his. “I’m not in love with Drew anymore, so there’s no need to make him jealous.”

“Thank God. What about you?”

She ignored the former comment. Rose did have a dealbreaker. She knew it would sound totally prudish on her end, but Rosalie knew her limits.

“No… No kissing.”

“What do you mean no kissing? Like, I can’t kiss you at all, or no tongue? Because I sure as hell know that we won’t be believable if I can’t kiss you.”

“And how would you know that?”

Derek pursed his lips. “I remember having an in-depth conversation with your brother about how gross you and Drew were together.”

Rosalie gaped at him. “And you didn’t stick your tongue down Jennifer’s throat at your engagement party?! It was like witnessing some messed-up porno. And, in my defense, Drew initiated every public—”

“I did not have my tongue down Jen’s throat!”

“Then why did Laura tell you two to get a room?”

Derek scowled. “Moving on…”

“Ok, rule 1: yes, to kissing. No tongue.” Rose ticked on her finger. “Two, no checking out other women. Like, at all.”

“You think I would do that when I’m engaged? I’m not a total dick.”

“I know that Derek. I’m just saying, when you were younger—”

“When I was younger. I’ve matured a lot since I was eighteen.”

She smacked his shoulder playfully. “You sure about that, Mr. I-throw-a-tantrum-every-time-I-lose-to-Scott-at-pool?”

“Shut up.”

“You can’t deny it, Hale. I know you too well… anything else to add?”

“No sex,” Derek said so suddenly that Rosalie about fell out of her spot on the couch.

“I…” She started, but couldn’t formulate a sentence, so she just nodded her agreement.

They sat in silence for a while, Rosalie processing what the hell happened.

“Let me warn you now. I don’t know how to be a good fiancé,” Derek added so softly that Rosalie might have missed it if she wasn’t so in tune with him.

“Derek…” She looked up to meet his green eyes, full of turmoil, of ghosts of past hurts. A haunted look that Rosalie knew too well. Only because she wore it too, late at night when she was alone with her demons.

Rosalie’s heart broke for him, and she pulled him into a hug. Derek was rarely vulnerable, preferring to keep those emotions locked tight. Rosalie was thankful that he opened himself up enough to let her see that side of him.

“You were a good fiancé, Der. It wasn’t your fault, that it ended. Jennifer was a bitch… I knew she wasn’t good for you,” Rosalie whispered into his shoulder, squeezing him tight so he knew that she meant every word.

Derek’s hot breath fanned over Rose’s neck as he spoke. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”

She pulled away from him, leaving her hands on his shoulders. Rosalie set him with an unimpressed look. “Would you have listened?”

Derek shook his head, a small smile overtaking the once hard line of his lips. “Nah, probably not.”

___________________________________________________________

Tags: @wolfarrowepz

#derek hale #derek hale fluff #tyler hoechlin #derek hale x reader #teen wolf

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lilquill · 6 years ago

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On Representation, Diversity, and “have characters of color just don’t write about the experience of being a person of color”

Alright. I’m gonna piss a bunch of people off and also confuse a bunch of well-intentioned white people because I don’t think that you can write about a character of color without talking about the experience of being a person of color of a certain culture.

Seriously. There’s so many conversations celebrating how people have narratives where it “doesn’t matter” that one of their characters is a person of color and that their characters’ identity as a person of color “doesn’t affect the storyline” or whatever.

I’m going to cut right to the chase here: as a reader and storyteller of color, I’m not a fan of narratives where race doesn’t affect the story.

My race and culture and ethnicity ABSOLUTELY impact the way I perceive the world around me! For instance, many South Asian families bond with lively debates and discussions and lovingly roasting their family members. The way that I develop positive relationships, often with a solid dose of conflict and loudness and argument, is therefore fundamentally different from the way a white person would develop relationships; in fact, many white people are intimidated by how loud South Asians like myself are. We’re dramatic and loud and love jokes with wordplay! That’s just how it is and it means I form bonds with people differently.

I also have different values. White people are often more individualistic in culture, with more weird distant formal bonds with their parents (shit like referring to their parents by first name or, on the other end of the spectrum, calling their dads “sir”???) as opposed to the more comfortable and closer bond I have with my parents, where my family is all up in my shit literally all the time LMAO.

Literally white families are SO DISTANT to the point where white people consider practices like co-sleeping with your young child, something very common in South Asian families, to be child abuse?? Like, as if keeping your baby in a crib in another room where they’re not close to you and it’s harder to hear them isn’t dangerous but apparently suffocating a child while sleeping (which is very rare especially since co-sleeping is a practice that has gone on for MILLENNIA) is the bigger threat here??

White kids might perceive that as invasive or a violation of their privacy; I don’t perceive it that way because of the way South Asian families are structured. There’s a stronger emphasis on closeness with family. Of course, there are situations of kids being estranged or difficult family relationships or child abuse in South Asian families as well, but family is more valued in my culture.

The plants I put in my garden are different because of my identity; flowers like bela (Arabian jasmine) and bougainvillea and roses and gladiolus and marigolds and such things are what I’m fond of because of biases based on what my parents and grandparents like. I even once grew nenua (a type of squash). (I’m gonna get my hands on a raat ki rani soon I hope!!) And, of course, not every South Asian is partial to these flowers, but there’s definitely a cultural aspect as to why I personally like them!

The colors and patterns I gravitate towards are also different! I’m not a big fan of western “neutrals” and I find bright colors more appealing, especially because hey, those vibrant shades look better on brown skin! And GUESS WHAT, part of why the western world gravitates towards neutral colors in formalwear is because of colonialism and a disdain for the vibrant colors and dyes that colonized countries used. I love wearing jhumka earrings and statement necklaces and bright, vibrant jewelry as well. Now, obviously, this isn’t the case with every South Asian, but there is certainly some level of impact on these choices from my culture and upbringing.

Hell, even the food I eat is different! I drink chai in the evenings. I gravitate towards spicier dishes and better seasoning. I don’t eat meat other than fish/seafood and chicken and occasionally turkey because of cultural stuff, though ofc lots of South Asians are vegetarian and on the flip side lots of South Asians DO eat red meat and stuff.

And this isn’t even universal to ALL South Asians by any means, because my parents are specifically Hindu and from northeastern India and I’ve grown up in California! And there’s so many other details I could go into but for the sake of not writing a twelve-page essay I’m stopping here.

Basically, my point is, I don’t want representation where race “doesn’t matter” to the story. Race impacts so many aspects of my life and how I perceive and interact with the world around me.

It’s ridiculous to me how so much “representation” is basically just starting with a default of a white character, making her brown, avoiding the stereotypes, and that’s....it. It doesn’t feel real. It doesn’t feel authentic to take away cultural impacts on your characters. People start with white western archetypes and tropes and try to mold them to fit characters of color, instead of starting off with an authentic character of color, and it really, really shows.

Especially because Tumblr and writeblr are such white spaces, and also because culture is usually picked up from the environment as opposed to online, the conversations centered around “representation” are always about “don’t do x stereotypes” as opposed to how to actually learn about other cultures and actually....write a character of color. So many of y’all only know how to NOT write a character of color as opposed to how to ACTUALLY write a character of color.

I see so many lists of tropes and things to not include in stories, and not enough things about values and family structures and food and fashion and ways of developing relationships and all that fun stuff that will shape who you are as a person.

And some of y’all don’t even TRY to, I dunno, engage with the culture of your character of color to actually write them. For instance, if you’re writing a South Asian character, go explore South Asian cinema! Go make South Asian friends who can tell you little details about their lives as they, y’know, exist and are your friend! In general, explore the movies and literature and music and dance types and food and drink and whatnot of the culture your character is from! Form relationships with people of those cultures; it’s the internet! I know this is a super white space but there’s PLENTY of poc on here! Make an effort, not just to avoid harmful stereotypes, but to write a character of color whose identity actually MATTERS.

When I’m reading escapist fantasy/sci-fi/romcom/etc. literature where characters aren’t being hurt by racism, I don’t want a story where RACE doesn’t exist, I want a story where RACISM doesn’t exist. I want cultural understanding, empathy, and compassion!

I don’t want a role a white character would play just switched out with a character of color.

For instance, in the movie To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before, Lara Jean’s identity as East Asian is reflected in her fashion choices; book author Jenny Han lent inspiration for this. The Yakult drinks she likes, inspired by Korean tastebuds, plays a role in the story, too. These are details that don’t necessarily heavily impact the plot; it’s a fake-dating high school romcom. But they make a more real, fleshed-out character. They’re little details, little in-jokes and references, showing that the character’s race and culture actually MATTER to the story.

There’s a part in Pacific Rim where Raleigh Beckett, a white man, is frustrated with Mako Mori, a Japanese woman, for not going against the wishes of her father figure, Pentecost. When he tells her she doesn’t have to obey him, she responds, “It’s not obedience, Mr. Beckett. It’s respect.” This depicts her cultural understanding of family and respect; her relationships and her responses to things are impacted by her culture.

This is what I’m talking about! In order to write an actual character of color, you MUST write about their experiences to a certain extent. Of course, don’t make your characters of a certain culture a monolith in terms of personalities and responses and all that, but understand how they may be similarly impacted by their identities.

Now, don’t write a whole damn novel about a character coming to terms with their racial identity and coping with racism, but you absolutely MUST holistically incorporate their identity into your narrative.

Otherwise, it’s not actually representation. It’s you essentially writing a racebent white character. It’s you using a white default and trying to adapt it to totally different experiences.

#i hope this made sense!#representation #diversity #representation matters #writing characters of color #writing south asian characters #writeblr #writing tips #writing advice #sakshi speaks #i might add more to this post later <3

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maggielindemanns · 3 years ago

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tag nine people to learn about their interests!

TAGGING: @ijzerengels @calumthoodshands @redrattlers @thenervousduck @arzkiya-hai @kritiquer @lesbianearn @sondergf @embeddedinmybrain @vexedtonightmares @tsjernobyl @bandsanitizer @tarcyjonsson and anyone else that wants to! idk who did this or not, sorry if you already did it but you may of course ignore me.

aaaa also thank you @ottelu for the tag! love u bestie <3

MUSIC

fave genre: r&b and pop, for sure

fave artist: ariana grande, halsey, savannah ré, normani, alina baraz, kiana ledé, chloe moriondo, troye sivan, the neighbourhood, bastille, 5SOS (& luke hemmings solo !!!!!! my baby) — basically i love music, we been knew, i have so many faves i can’t pick one

fave song: rn it’s for sure ur best friend by kiana ledé ft kehlani or girl on tv by chloe moriondo

most listened to song lately: according to last.fm, it’s wild side by normani agskdhsk i do wish she released it without cardi tho i’ll die on this hill idc its fine i just skip her part

song currently stuck in your head: you right by doja cat actually and ur best friend i couldn’t stop singing those two at work

five fave lyrics (in no particular order, there’s too many i love omg)

“i know i’ll never meet your expectations / but the picture that you paint of me looks better in your mind” — high, 5SOS

“you don’t believe in one divine / but can you tell me you believe in mine? / ‘cause you’ve been my god, my god / and when you’re gone i’m godless, i’m godless” — godless, banks

“you’re the only one, you’re the only one / i’m so wrapped up in a daze / hoping this is just a phase / but when all is said and done / i know you are still the one” — the only one, the black keys

“i get lost inside all the stars in your eyes, it’s a galaxy / you control the tide like the moon in the sky, you’re the gravity” — more than enough, alina baraz

“standing there, you look at me / understanding everything / yeah, it’s so fascinating / you patch up the blood and the cuts / but our blood got mixed up / so i guess we belong to each other” — love song, yungblud

BOOKS

fave book genre: idk i prefer like YA novels and romance i guess but idc really, i just don’t like fantasy stuff like harry potter or . historical fiction?? i guess you could call it?? (tried to read pride and prejudice for leisure ……….. boring as fuck like holy shit) or science fiction like boring boring boring idc no offense to anyone that loves it of course

fave writer: don’t have one really

fave book: aaaaaa i don’t have one of these either !! the one that always comes to mind though is giovanni’s room, but i just love that book, it was brilliant

fave series: mmmm i don’t really like series but caro’s got me into reading trc so i guess that’ll be my fave series once i’m done!

comfort book: rwrb <3

fave book to read on a rainy day: giovanni’s room sgsjdhsj i literally reread it bc it has some of my fave lines ever

fave characters: adam parrish, blue sargent, ronan lynch, gansey but he on thin ice, ari and dante, aiden navarro, alex claremont-diaz, charlie and nick (actually . everyone in heartstopper except the characters that are a plague <3), and more that i cannot think of most likely

five fave book quotes: (again no particular order i love so many)

“My dear fellow, you forget that we are in the native land of the hypocrite.” || “The world is changed because you are made of ivory and gold. The curves of your lips rewrite history.” — the picture of dorian gray, oscar wilde

“topography on the map of you, a world i’m still charting.” — red, white, and royal blue, casey mcquiston

“It is cruel to have made me want to live only to make my death more bloody.” || “I loved him. I do not think that I will ever love anyone like that again.” || “And here my baby came indeed, through all that sunlight, his face flushed and his hair flying, his eyes, unbelievably, like morning stars.” || “And there’s something awful about being at the mercy of a stranger.” — giovanni’s room, james baldwin (ik i cheated so bad w this SHUSH)

“And then I think we all realized what fools we’d been. We might get out sometime, but she was locked up forever in that body.” — girl, interrupted, susanna kaysen

“You and I, we don’t walk the lines. We just follow the echoes.” || “My mother used to say, ‘Don’t throw compliments away, so long as they’re free.’” His face was very earnest. “That one wasn’t meant to cost you anything, Blue.” — the raven boys, maggie stiefvater

TV & MOVIES

fave tv/movie genres: coming of age, romance (ehhh to some degree), i like indie movies, idk same as books i dont like science fiction, historical stuff, or fantasy im boring okay

fave movie: dont have one tbh

comfort movie: speech and debate or easy a

movie you watch every year: dont have one

fave tv show: dear white people or skam + remakes, i like other ones tho like stranger things

comfort show: skamverse <3 not exactly an answer but mhm

most rewatched tv show: skamverse or dear white people OR THE FOSTERS …. dude …….. i used to watch that all day every day then they took it off netflix …. now it’s dance moms i play for background noise and watch on occasion

five favorite characters: lionel higgins, joelle brooks, olive penderghast, lucas lallemant, eleonora sava, fallon carrington, howie (speech and debate), connor walsh, annalise keating, wes gibbins, archie coleman, ellie chu, beth harmon, lara jean covey (yes here i am overlisting again i’m so sorry)

#tag game #this was long but i enjoyed i havent done one of these in a while so yeehaw #its also been in my drafts for days rip sorry i know i got tagged eons ago

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lifeisadoozy · 4 years ago

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sharing a short dousy video edit i made.

i don't know why but i really like this and thought i'd share it on here too.

should i rant about what goes in my head while making this video? no. will i? yes.

basically the song is beginning middle end by leah nobel from to all the boys i've loved before part 3. this song is basically about two people falling in love from the early years of their lives. since lara jean and peter met when they were kids. but then started (fake) dating in high school and their adventure together started right then and there. anyway, watch the movies if you haven't already. this song fits lara jean and peter so well (i don't know if it was written specifically for them or not).

but daisy and sousa didnt meet when they were kids because of one obvious reason: when daisy was a kid, sousa's dead; and when sousa was a kid, daisy hadn't been born yet. they weren't supposed to meet. so their journey started off separately.

daisy's beginning in shield was rocky, to say the least. but she found a home there with coulson, fitzsimmons and may (i'll get to ward) in season 1. they bonded quite quickly, mainly daisy skye and coulson. i think it shifts when she got shot by ian quinn. everyone in the team, especially ward was terrified and angry at the situation. now. she had a relationship with miles early on in the season, which was broken off. but within the context of the song, her beginning was ward. he was her s.o. she was falling for him when she uncovered that he's hydra. add that trauma to the ones she already had prior to shield. no wonder she has trust issues.

her middle was her powers. even though the story started early in the series, it's still the middle. because she struggled with her powers throughout seasons 2 - 5. the middle would always be the bulk of it all. it's where everything happens. it's the crux of a character, of a person. it's where daisy became daisy. now, in the middle of her middle (pun very much intended), was lincoln. the first inhuman who helped her and understood her. i'm sure they've got their own problems and everything, but it doesn't change the fact that he was someone who knew what she's going through. none of her found family could help her the way he could. this is where i think it gets interesting. seasons 2 - 5, where i said was her middle, and basically the peak/climax of daisy as a character, she was falling for and fell for lincoln. it was known that daisy was still in love with lincoln in season 5. possibly around 2 years after he died. but then we found out that she had moved on from lincoln in the beginning of season 6.

season 6 and 7 is the end of her journey with the team. they're still a family. just a family who occassionally see each other. now in season 6, like i mentioned previously, it was acknowledged that daisy had moved on. the past will always be with her, no doubt. the trauma would stick. hopefully just bits and pieces. but it would still be there until she either had alzheimer's, dementia, any other retrograde amnesia injuries or diseases, or the day she died. she would never forget lincoln or ward, heck even miles. she won't forget her past. unless it was taken away from her. so, back to the topic at hand, she wanted her own fitz. she had grown from the woman she was in the beginning, she had grown from the woman and superhero that she was in the middle. she knows who she is now. with the people she worked with. and the people she calls her family. and also with anyone. daisy's ending was perfect (to me at least). she wasn't looking for love right then and there. she was burnt one too many times. but she wanted that kind of love and support. the love and support that fitz and simmons have for each other. something that daisy lacked all her life. she ended up with someone who gave her what she wanted. and what she needed.

with sousa, it's a little different. because we didn't get to see much of his background and family life. we didn't get to know what his life was like during the war and before the war. we begin to see him in the ssr. we all knew, literally everyone knew, even the characters knew that sousa's practically in love with peggy. except for maybe peggy herself. but i'm sure she had an inkling. she definitely had an inkling. but then things go on and he became chief of the west coast office and he was in los angeles while peggy was in new york. he moved on (or so we thought). he started dating violet and was ready to marry her. he told her he loved her. and he did. it's just that he was also in love with peggy. still. and violet saw that. it's as clear as day. and they broke it off.

we didn't get to see much of sousa's middle. mainly because ac wasn't renewed for a third season. which was such a waste because it ended with so many things left unanswered. but we know that between 1947 - 1955, peggy and sousa broke up. we have no idea why. we don't know if steve was back. nada. all we know is that they broke up. when did they break up? again. no idea. but we know that peggy means a lot to sousa. she's like (sorta; i don't like making comparisons but anyway) sousa's lincoln in a way (i'm not saying that they're the exact replica. daisy/lincoln and peggy/sousa are quite different. but they do have similarities. those pairings are the kind where they want to be together forever but knew that it wouldn't work; my interpretation). she didn't die, we know that. but she's sort of the one that got away. my guess is that it's because shield and the world was more important than each other. which wasn't dissimilar to daisy and lincoln's situation. so, yes. peggy's sousa's middle. she influenced him a lot. and he found himself amidst ssr and shield (just like daisy did).

sousa's end was again, perfect. he went to the future. got to see what the organisation he helped build came to be. he went on an adventure to explore space. which he would geek out over. instead of dying, he got to live. with the love of his (new) life. he may be a man out of time, but with daisy and their ragtag family, he is right where he belongs.

daisy and sousa began with "who the hell are you" and ended with "it's beautiful" (just putting this here because i love that fact).

so. they started pretty quickly, didn't they? 4 episodes in and sousa fell in love with daisy. 7 episodes in and daisy fell in love with sousa. though i doubt that they thought they're in love. but they're falling. or walking towards it. 7x03 was when they met. it's where it all began. in area 51 of all places (foreshadow much?). but what's even more interesting is that technically, they began twice. from daisy's perspective, they met in 6x13 (which plenty of people had pointed out; but @agents-of-fangirling was the most recent). even though they didn't actually meet because sousa was wearing that blue (seriously his colour really is blue) hazmat suit and daisy was disoriented (may dying and all that jazz). but from sousa's perspective, they met in 7x03. where they actually made eye contact and conversed. how many couples can say that the when of their first encounter was debatable?

now. their middle, in the video edit, i used the scene from 7x10. because i think that's a pretty good middle. they had their first first kiss. sousa had no idea that happened. yet, there he was, wanting to help. just like his time-loop self. he extended a hand and she accepted. she accepted help. do you know how much of a development that was??? because i think that it's a huge character development (i still haven't rewatched so don't take my word for it). i think that's a good depiction of their middle. oh yeah. before i forgot. they also had two first kisses. and again, i say, how many couples can say that they had two first kiss? figured i'd choose the scene in the middle of those first kisses (pun intended lmao).

sidenote: did y'all see the devastation in her eyes when sousa volunteered to stay in the 80s? or how her eyes went wide and she started to panic when he was injected in the time loops? sousa's a man of action. and when he says something, he means it. so, his constant concern over daisy and him wanting to help in any way he can, it's his love language.

and then we have their ending. the perfect end to an imperfect couple (because nobody's perfect *cue hannah montana*). daisy got sousa a typewriter. because he's from the 50s. since when did daisy buy gifts for her boyfriends/partners/lovers? and they watched e.t. together? that's normal couple things. even though they are far from normal. but they get to experience it all together. daisy didn't get to in the past. none that we know of anyway. and now she does. also, that smile when she talks about him. that fond smile that grazed her lips at the thought of him. i've never seen her smile like that before (none that i remember; and if she did, well then i'm so so happy for her). she looks happy. serene. and her saying "he's a dork" twice in the season just makes my heart burst with happiness for them.

sidenote: my headcannon is that "he's a dork" is code for "i love him too much to explain it in words."

i'd like to believe that even though it has ended, their story has just begun. they're going through their middle right now. and i hope that they won't end. in other words, their end was not an ending. it was a beginning of a new life.

as daisy said, "we're loving the journey together." keyword: journey. it's a long road up ahead. with countless of challenges and obstacles in the way. but in the end, all that matters is that they face it together.

that's it. thanks for coming to my ted talk (for those who actually read it all the way through, i love you).

#watch the video til the very end😉#dousy #i know nobody's gonna read this #but i needed to hash it out #😬😬#character analysis #sort of #relationship analysis #🥺👉👈#sorry for the long ass post #like seriously long #i set out to write a quick lil paragraph and ended up writing an essay

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thomasstanley-h · 5 years ago

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Happy Halloween | t.h.

You're at a party when you spot an ex. Quick, you urgently have to pretend to be dating the nearest person, who happens to be very attractive.

college au

1.7k

It was the night of Halloween, and you have just begrudgingly arrived at some frat house that was full of drunk college kids who were wearing different kinds of makeshift costumes that’s still somehow appropriate for the holiday.

With your own makeshift costume of a black shirt, mom jeans, and your brother’s old suit jacket with your hair slicked back and eyes made up with some messy black eyeshadow, trying to pass off as “punk Eleven” from Stranger Things, you walk inside with your best friend, who was dressed up as Lara Croft, and head straight to the kitchen where the drinks were.

“Hey!” Brad, one of the frat members, greeted the two of you. “You guys made it!” He shouted, obviously drunk.

“Yeah!” Your best friend, Tammy, responded matching his drunken enthusiasm.

You were laughing at the comical interaction happening in front of you when you spot the familiar curls of your ex boyfriend. “Holy shit, Tam.” You dragged her to the kitchen by her elbow, thinking of how to avoid him the rest of the night. “He’s here!” You panic, looking at her with wide eyes.

“Okay, chill dude. Have a drink.” She took two cans of beer from the cooler on top of the kitchen counter and gave one to you. “Have fun, pretend he’s not here. Mingle.” Tammy winked at you and went to the living room that was turned into a sort of dance floor.

Taking a rather large sip from your drink, you walked out to the backyard trying to look for someone you know. You were just minding your own business when some drunk girl bumped into you quite hard, making you stumble forward. Luckily, someone caught you by the waist before you fell on your face.

“Woah there.” The person said, with what sounded like a British accent. “Are you okay?” He asked, his hands still on your waist holding you up.

“Yeah, uh, sorry.” You look up to see brown eyes staring at you. “Thank you.”

Your savior shook his head, with a small smile on his face, and said, “No problem, don’t want El to fall.”

You stood up straight, and gave him a sheepish grin, turning red at the cheeks. “I–uh–thanks again. Gotta go.”

You quickly walked back inside, trying to escape from further humiliation from the cute British guy. When, “Ah, shit.” You saw your ex walking towards you and you spun around going back out and falling into him again, but this time with your arms around his neck.

“Hi?” He greeted, sounding like a question with confusion written all over his face.

“Uh, hi again.” You grin. “So, my ex is here and he’s coming towards us right now and, uh, can you like pretend to be with me tonight?” You mumble with pleading eyes.

“Yeah, sure.” With that, the sweetest smile crept up on his face along with his hands circling your waist. “Hm, where’s this—“ He was about to say something when your ex finally reached the two of you.

You feel a tap on your shoulder and hear your name called. You close your eyes for a second and let out a huff of breath before letting your arms drop from British dude’s shoulders and turning around to face him.

“Hey, Shawn!” You greet, trying to seem excited to see him. “Didn’t know you’d be here!” You step forward to give him a one-arm hug and went back to your previous position.

“Yeah, a friend of a friend invited me.” He said, his eyes going to your waist where British cutie’s arm is still wrapped. “Hey man, I’m Shawn.” He stretched out his hand to shake, introducing himself.

“Hey, Tom. It’s nice to meet you.” The young man beside you said, making you internally face palm, realizing that you’ve never exchanged names before this altercation.

“You too. So, you’ve, uh, been together long?” Shawn asked, confusing you a little.

Tom’s arm tightened at your waist a little, and you find yourself liking the feeling of it. “A little, yeah.” He said, not missing a beat.

“Oh, cool.” Shawn mumbled.

“How have you been?” You said as Tom took his arm away from your waist to entwine your hands together, and Shawn looking at them briefly.

“I’ve been good.” He replied simply. “Hey, I have to go meet up with some friends. See you later, yeah?”

“Sure, it was nice seeing you, Shawn.” You bid your good byes and gave him another of those half-assed hugs.

“You too, it was nice meeting you man.” And with that, he was back inside the house leaving you alone with Tom who was still holding your hand.

“Holy shit.” You sigh a breath of relief, not really realizing that you were still connected by the hands just because of how natural it felt.

Tom squeezing your hand set you back to reality and you turn to look at him with the biggest smile on your face. “You okay?”

“Yes, thank you, oh my goodness. You’re a life-saver.” You squeezed his hand back tightly. “Oh crap, I never really got to introduce myself huh?” You let go of his hand, stepping back and stretched it out for him to shake, and introduced yourself.

“I’m Tom.” He shook your outstretched hand, chuckling at the silliness of it all. “You want to go grab a drink?”

You finally realize you’ve lost the can of beer that you’ve been nursing in the middle of everything. “Yes, please. What department are you in? I feel like this is the first time I’ve seen you, and everybody knows everybody with how small our campus is.”

“Performing Arts.” He responded. “Yeah, I actually just transferred.”

You arrive at the kitchen, and Tom grabbed a can and wiped the top with his shirt before opening it and giving it to you then took one for himself. “Thanks, and I’m guessing you’re from the UK?” You say sarcastically because of how obvious where he’s from.

“Hm, Japan actually.” Tom tried to play along with you making you giggle. “I’ve actually seen you a couple of times around campus, running from building to building. What department are you in?”

You blush at the thought of the cute guy paying attention to you to actually remember you, and at the thought of the cute guy seeing you at your worst. “Psychology and Journalism, double major.” You shrug at him. “A bit pretentious, I know.” You follow up, trying to save yourself from the judgment you tend to get when people find out you were a double major.

“I think it’s impressive actually. I know I wouldn’t have the strength and will to do what you’re doing.” He said, shaking his head a little.

You shrug at him, not knowing what to say. “So, uh, thanks again for saving me back there.”

“It’s no problem, really. I’ve had my fair share of bad exes that I want to run away from.” Tom chuckled.

The night went on as you feel yourself getting a little tipsy, and surprisingly, Tom still hasn’t left your side. “You don’t have to stay with me, you know. You can go ahead and talk to other people.”

“I like being with you.” He responded simply, making you flush even more than how the booze is making you.

“Oh hush, I’m not that drunk yet.” You joked, giggling. “I have a question.”

“Yeah?”

“What are you supposed to be?” You asked, looking at him from head to toe, thinking of what his costume is. He was just wearing a basic black shirt and some jeans with a pair of sneakers.

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m trying to look like the douche who doesn’t dress up for halloween.” He put his arms out and twirled slowly giving you the whole view of what looks to be an amazingly fit work of art.

“Oh wow, never could’ve guessed that.” You giggled again, definitely feeling the effects of the booze.

“Hey, do you want to—“ It seems that he was about to ask you to leave when your best friend stumbled into the room and dropped into you, almost making the two of you fall if it wasn’t for Tom’s quick reflexes.

“Oh shit, Tammy!” You struggle to hold her up, with Tom’s hands on your back supporting you. “How drunk are you!”

“Just a little.” She said, slurring her words. “I wanna go to bed now, please. Thank you.” Tammy was about to close her eyes and fall asleep right then and there in your arms.

“Tammy, no!” Your arms were hooked by her armpits supporting the dead weight.

“Here.” Tom went in front of her, ducking slightly and telling you to put your best friend on his back so he could piggy-back her.

“I’m so sorry for this one.” The two of you walk out the frat house towards your dorm to get your best friend to bed. “I’m really really sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He replied, chuckling. “Looks like Tammy had fun.”

“Too much fun, if you ask me.” You sighed, looking at your best friend. “This is why I don’t drink too much when we’re together.”

After a few more minutes of walking, you arrive at the dorms and put Tammy to bed. You went to the bathroom to wash off the messy eye make-up and went out to the living room to see Tom standing awkwardly in the middle of it.

“I bet you didn’t expect to carry a drunk chick at the end of the night.” You joked, plopping down on the living room floor, tapping the space beside you.

Tom followed suit and said, “I honestly don’t know what to expect anymore with American parties.”

“C’mon, let’s go get something to eat.” You stood up from the floor and grabbed his hand, trying to pull him up. “You’re heavy, get up!” You whine, still struggling to pull him up.

You suddenly find yourself falling as Tom pulled you down to him, and landing on his hard chest. You blush at the close proximity of your faces, your eyes going to his lips before going back up to his brown ones.

“I think I like this more than food.” He whispered, looking at your lips.

“I think so too.” With that, you lean your head down to catch his lips on yours, thinking that going to that stupid halloween party wasn’t so bad at all.

#tom holland #thomas stanley holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland imagines #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction #imagine #imagines #halloween #and yes that is shawn mendes bec oomf #tom holland x reader #first time writing for tom and i must say im enjoying this #thomasstanley-h

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kpoptionate · 6 years ago

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monsta x ⇾ you wear really tight jeans

[masterlist in bio] 19 june 2019 a/n: nobody asked for this,,,,,,don’t know why i wrote it

hyunwoo ♡

won’t say anything if anyone else is around but deffffffffo thinking to himself

when u walk away from him,,,,,,,don’t be surprised if he has a heart attack

lowkey shy around the guys when u just,,,,,stand there

but will make u be near him w an arm around ur waist to save u from their,,,,prying eyes

just kisses the top of ur head n smiles at u, doesn’t rly make a big deal out of it

hoseok ♡

ok we all know seok’s a midkey perv so rly what is there for me to write that’s not automatically expected from him

pls just let him run his hands up and down ur thighs

deffo smacks ur ass n grabs it as u walk by

n then just gives u a rly cheesy smile when u look at him

probably takes a pic w u over his lap or sleepin or smth and sets it as his wallpaper tbh

minhyuk ♡

( ⚆‿⚆ )( ⚆‿⚆ )( ⚆‿⚆ )

checking u oUT like a teenager

also ready 2 fite his members if they even so much as look in ur direction

rly smiley but u don’t know why til he goes ‘come sit on my lap baby’ n then it’s just obvious

but uh,,,,,,,try not to move around too much,,,,,,can’t guarantee u’ll be safe once the other members leave

kihyun ♡

ok but when u hit him w them dark blue skinny jeans ?? holy sHIETTTTTTTT

makes u sit down with him so the guys can’t check you out

but expect his hand to roam across ur thighs and as much of ur ass as he can reach while u’re sitting

also wants to be shameless and say smth but has enough respect to at least whisper in ur ear

“u look so good in those jeans i almost don’t wanna take them off” HHHHHHHH

hyungwon ♡

u kno that thing guys do where they like let out one laugh and look/turn their head to the side and then look back forward down with their tongue in their cheek kinda nodding their head a lil

that’s exactly what hyungwon’s doing bc how dARE u come out here lookin all sexy n shit w/o even trying

motions u over to sit in his lap n rests his hands on ur thighs

winks to u as u do so yk what’s up

also is smiling to himself like a kid in a candy shop bc that’s basically what it is

jooheon ♡

so as he’s stated before, joo loves someone who looks mighty fine in a pair of jeans

so the second you walk by in them he’s ಥ_ಥ trying not to combust

highkey upset when another member looks at u & will whine loud enough for ppl in the other room to hear

and then calls u over bc he needs a) to shield u from the other guys and b) a better view, duh

might b shy, probably not, depends on the day and the outfit u have on

but know as much as joo likes seeing u in jeans,,,,,,,,he likes u a lil bit more w them off so don’t be surprised when they are

changkyun ♡

absolutely shameless

literally straight up says “damn baby ur ass looks good” or smth regardless of who’s around

also does not take his eyes off of u until he is physically unable to look anymore

ykno that thing from tatbilb where whatshisface was walking w his hand in lara’s back pocket

that’s exactly what kyun’s doing,,,,,,,but who’s complaining

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avinhd15stuff · 4 years ago

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Week 4 - Attack on Titan 4x9 + Chapter 137, MHA chapter 301

Alright, this week gonna be a little different cause I’m saving the MHA portion for the end. First I’ll discuss the newest episode of the anime, then discuss the new chapter.

First off, the new episode of the Attack on Titan anime continues the streak of having a really good adaptation of the manga. We’re now entering what I call the “Manbun Eren” portion of the show, mainly due to his hairstyle and because this section is when he has complete dominance over the story, despite not being featured much in the manga. (As an aside I call the Marley invasion arc the “Hobo Eren” era because he looks kinda like one, and these descriptions come from reddit.) In this episode we see the reaction of the Scouts to Sasha’s death with Mikasa’s standing out the most to me. A bunch of the episode is flashback to detail how the Liberio raid was planned and how Zeke began working with Paradis. It then shows how Eren and Zeke are detained on the Island, the former because he technically was disobeying orders, the latter cause they’re being cautious. Lastly we see that the entire episode was being narrated by Armin to none other than Annie who we last saw in action back in Season 1. We also see the introduction of new characters like Yelena and Nicolo, Marleyans who were sent to the island and joined the Eldian side there. I feel like this episode is a good start to the post invasion arc and characterizes the new Marleyans and Eldians well. Overall there is less CG this time (with the exception of Zeke’s prison in the forest I didnt catch much) which is always a plus in this medium. I look forward to next episode

Now, onto the new chapter of Attack on titan, chapter 137. I honestly had mixed feelings about this chapter when it released on Tuesday, however I feel that I like it better after a few days. The chapter starts of with Armin talking to Zeke in Paths while he is making sandcastles. This sets up the exposition for how titans came to be and what Paths is. Zeke then goes on to explain that people are neither dead or alive while in Paths and that people (so far only titan shifters have come) who are dead in the real world can appear and talk in Paths. Armin and Zeke then use this fact to basically revive the old titan shifters and turn the tide of battle instantly against Eren and the founder Ymir. Zeke pops out from the fouding titan, discovers the meaning of life, then gets decapitated by Levi, stopping the Rumbling. During this commotion, Gabi free’s Armin from the Okapi titan with her aimbot sniping, Jean saves Pieck from the previous Warhammer titan (Lara Tybur, we got her name in the anime) and then reconnects the bombs on Eren’s neck and detonates them, causing Eren’s Titan’s head to fall of and the founding titan’s orignial form to come out to reattach it. However Reiner then grabs it in a hold using the Armored Titan and the Scouts Retreat on the back of Falco’s Flying (technically jaw) titan. Armin then releases the Collosal Nuke transformation to destroy the founding Titan’s real body as well as Eren himself, as the rest of the Scouts watch.

Honestly, this felt like the biggest asspull I’ve seen other than the end to each Jojo part when I read it the first time. (Araki-sensei takes the cake for those, like the end to each part can be described as one of those play fights you had as a kid where you try to one up each other, ESPECIALLY the end to Part 2.) Now that its been out for a couple days, it still seems a bit intense but the whole revive the dead part is the only part that wasn’t foreshadowed much in the story. Everything else that happened was either directly part of the Scout’s plans or was heavily teased earlier. I am personally looking forward to how Isayama is going to wrap up the story in the next 2 chapters.

Lastly onto the MHA chapter 301. This chapter provides some background for the Todoroki family dynamic, as well as providing more of Toya Todoroki’s story. The chapter starts with the marriage between Enji and Rei, and how Endeavor’s passion for beating All might lead to the quirk marriage. It then shows how Enji gave up on Toya when it was discovered that while his fire quirk is stronger than Endeavor’s his body’s constitution cannot handle the heat and he burns himself. However, Toya inherited the will to pass All Might and was pushing endeavor to keep training him even though Endeavor refused to protect Toya, actively pushing him away from being a hero. He went on to have Fuyumi and Natsuo in order to discourage Toya but that didnt work, however when the “perfect” child Shoto was born and Endeavor focused more on him Toya tries to get Endeavors attention back, but finally snaps. At the end of the chapter he attacks the rest of the family with his flames in a cliffhanger. I liked this chapter as we get to see more of Toya’s perspective of the family as well as see character development for Enji as well. The next chapter appears to be a continuation of this one and the chances for a timeskip happening soon are low. Honestly after this todoroki mini arc, i expect about 3-5 more chapters before the chance of a timeskip would happen.

Overall this week was big on exposition and character development in both series as well as in the anime and manga for SNK. The next chapter of MHA is next friday, the next episode of Attack on Titan is tomorrow, and the penultimate chapter for SNK is in early march.

#SnK Spoilers #snk season 4 #snk manga #snk brave volunteers #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #snk #snk 137 #mha spoilers #mha manga #mha 301 #todoroki #jojo part 2 #jojos bizzare adventure

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dreams-madeof-strawberrylemonade · 5 years ago

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Run

Request: HERE A/N: Writing some pure and reckless Jake is always so much fun, it’s a breath of fresh air from all the work I have going on at the moment. I am glad I got this request, thank you @lara-gvf, hope you like it!! Critiques and comments are welcome! Enjoy :) Word count: 2.1 K+ Warnings: drinking and well... mentions of nudity, nothing explicit though. I’d rate it a PG 15

To be added to the permanent taglist, DM me or leave an ask!

Fanfiction Masterlist

You stood in front of the door to the Kiszka’s residence, tapping your foot to the pavement as you felt the heaviness of your bags in your arms. You rang the doorbell again and knocked on the wooden door. “Open up, Jake or I’m gonna throw all the Jack on the pavement!”

You knew that that was the thing that would motivate Jake to move his ass to the door faster. You were not surprised when you heard the key turn and you heard the door open.

“Throwing the Jack away is straight up madness and waste of money,” said Sam. “Jake’s getting ready,” he added and winked at you. You rolled your eyes, already used to all of the Kiszkas always assuming that you and Jake were dating, a common misunderstanding due to your closeness.

Reality was that you have been crushing on him for a while now, but you tried to play it cool. You knew that Sam knew, because one evening, him and Josh got you drunk and you partly admit the truth, but you have been trying to deny it ever since.

“You know, he bought a new cologne, special for tonight,” Sam added as he closed the door.

“Happy for him, but what’s the occasion?” you played dumb.

“You know, getting drunk with the girl he likes, at his place, you know,” he smirked.

“You’re a dumbass, Sam,” you heard Jake’s raspy voice. You turned your head and a smile bloomed on your lips at his sight. “Hi, Y/N. I bet you got used to how Sam is,” he continued, accentuating the last part.

“How Sam is?” Jake’s younger brother repeated in a mocking voice. “How is he?” he asked and cocked an eyebrow. “From what I know about him, I can tell he’s hot, talented, gets the chicks…”

“You made your point,” Jake answered, totally giving up.

“How’s that new riff coming along?” you suddenly ask, your eyes locking with Jake’s. You actually just remembered that he told you a couple of days ago that he was working on something new and that he was going to play the new piece for you whenever you’d get around.

“Come on, you’re both so boring,” Sam laughed and took the two bottles of Jack Daniels that you brought along and put it on the kitchen table. “I’m gonna pour the first round, Jake, you take care of the music.”

You followed Jake to the record player in the corner of the room and sat on the floor as his fingers skillfully flicked through the boxes of records. His brows furrowed from time to time, then they’d rise, as if he was surprised by something. He’d stop for few moments and look at a certain record, then he’d resume his search.

“I’m almost done with it, I can play it for you later this evening if you want,” he finally answered your question as he finally chose a record and put it in the player.

You walked together into the kitchen, catching Sam already down the first glass. “You’re already one behind,” he laughed, throwing his head back.

You and Jake were quick to catch up. Out of the three of you, Jake had the highest tolerance to alcohol, while yours was almost zero. This being said, it didn’t take you long to start laughing from every little thing and start speaking out loud every single thought in your head.

“How about we play something?” Sam grinned and cracked his knuckles.

“Right, but first, we’ve got to stay hydrated,” Jake said and you stifled a giggle. He sounded just like a concerned mom in that moment. Jake rested his hand on your thigh for a brief moment before he sat up and got clean glasses for the water. Your whole body shuddered at Jake’s hand there. Even now, moments after he was gone, it was like you could still feel the trace of it.

Jake sat down the three glasses on the table and refilled the ones for the whiskey. He poured a little bit more in his and added two more ice cubes since the previous ones have melted.

“There’s nothing better than some Jack on the rocks,” he mumbles almost to himself as he takes a considerable sip of his freshly poured drink. Even though he wouldn’t admit it, he was getting pretty drunk, just like you and Sam. “Right, so, what you wanted to play?”

“Truth or dare,” Sammy answered and a mischievous smile appeared on his face.

It was like his words brought a little bit of soberness into you. For a moment, you felt in danger. Drunken truth or dare never ended well. You nervously sipped some of the cold ice water and you could feel yourself slightly returning to your senses.

“What d’you say?” Jake slurred and snapped you out of your thoughts.

“Alright. Truth or dare it is,” you gulp loudly. Sam didn’t even bother to hide the contentment on his face.

“Okay kids, these are the rules: you can deny only two dares in the whole game, but after you consumed your denials, you must choose one of the previously denied dares. Other rules is that there are none.” Sam informed and cleared his throat.

“I’ll go first. Dare,” Jake spoke.

“I dare you to… chug the rest of the bottle,” Sam answered and held up the Jack bottle with only a few sips left in it.

“That’s the best you got?” Jake laughed and unscrewed the cap and let his head fall back as he poured every last drop of whiskey. “Pathetic. Your turn.”

“Truth.”

“Chicken,” Jake mocked his brother and you laughed. “Is it true that you secretly have an altar for Justin Bieber in the back of your closet?”

“What the hell?” Sam laughed loudly and shook his head. “No!”

“My turn,” you chirped after the brothers were done taking the piss out of each other. “Dare. Because I am not a chicken, unlike Sam,” you accentuate your last words.

“I dare you to make out with Jake, right here, right now,” Sam grinned.

“Dude, you have to be more, you know, less obvious?” Jake pitched in, his cheeks gaining a rosy tint.

“I’m gonna deny it,” you swallow loudly.

“Careful there, you have only one more denial,” Sam grinned. “I dare you to set a chair on fire.”

“What?” you exclaim. He was absurd. Why would you do that? “I’m denying it.”

“I dare you to run around naked on the street,” he answered.

Your jaw basically dropped. Sam was an actual evil genius. He knew exactly how to get you to do something you didn’t want to do.

“And what happens if I deny this one, too?” you raise an eyebrow.

“You’ll have to choose between one of these three challenges,” Sam shrugged.

The burning chair sounded tempting but there was no way in hell you were going to risk a mass fire to the whole neighborhood. You weren’t a moron – you did study history and you knew how the Great Fire of London from 1666 started.

“Guess I’ll go running,” you sigh and stand up. “But first I got to use the washroom.”

You walk inside of the bathroom and turn on the tap and wash your face with the cold water. You looked at yourself in the mirror and shook your head. Drunken truth or dare was always a bad idea. No exceptions.

“Because Jake jumped in to save his little princess, he will suffer the same fate as you,” Sam announced as you walked out of the washroom.

“What if someone calls the cops on us?” Jake asks as you turned your head towards him. You saw that he already had his shirt off and the belt was laying on the couch, his jeans zipper already undone. You caught yourself blushing as another wave of soberness washed over you.

“That will be your problem, not mine. Guess who’s the dumbass now.”

“Can I at least keep my panties on?” you sigh and furrow your brows at the absurdity of your question.

Sam squeezed his eyes a little, as if he was thinking about it. “Nope. Then where would the fun be?”

You went back in the kitchen and completely downed the rest of your drink and tossed aside the grey joggers you had on and the t-shirt. Once you were completely undressed, you wrapped a fresh towel that you just received around your body and stepped outside of the house, basically wearing only sneakers.

You met Jake in the middle of the street who also had a towel around his waist. Your eyes met his and the only thing you could make out behind the half-drunk eyes was an apologetic look.

“Listen up dumbasses! One of you is going to run to the left and the other one to the right and you will make a lap around the neighborhood. It shouldn’t last longer than three minutes unless someone decides to call the cops. I promise I won’t look,” Sam giggled before whistling.

“I won’t look either,” Jake said as you were back-to-back, waiting to start running.

At Sam’s signal, you let your towel fall on the cement and you basically sprinted as fast as your feet allowed you to the corner of the street and then around it. You only saw Jake for a fraction of a second, as if he were a ghost in a dream.

“That’s fucking traumatic,” you mutter as you walk inside the house, wrapped in your towel once again.

“Tell me about it,” Jake rolled his eyes and guided you inside.

The inside of the house was enveloped in darkness. While Jake went to his room to get back into his clothes, you went into the kitchen and gathered yours and put them on in a hurry. The alcohol has completely worn down thanks to the cold air outside and the adrenaline rushing through your veins.

“He’s asleep,” Jake whispered as you walked into the living room.

“Huh,” you stifle a laugh. “Then I guess I must go.”

“You can stay,” Jake said a little louder than before, catching you off-guard. “You can sleep in my room, I’ll get the couch.”

“If I stay, I’m getting the couch, and you the room,” you correct him and you could see in the darkness a smile on his face.

“How about we’re both getting the couch?”

Your brain didn’t quite catch it on time, so before you realized what was Jake trying to do, his lips were against yours. “Hope that’s alright?” Jake whispered and you could feel his eyes on your face.

You didn’t bother with words anymore, so you just pressed your lips against his in an open mouth kiss. Jake’s arms wrapped around your waist, slowly pushing you closer to the couch and eventually you both collapsed on it with a muffled thud.

“Y/N,” Jake whispered in-between desperate kisses. “I really, really like you.”

“I like you, too, and I have for a long time,” you admitted and felt as if a stone had been lifted off your chest.

Jake inched closer to you and your lips collided again, with a lot more softness, but increasingly becoming hungrier and more desperate. Jake softly bit your bottom lip and tugged at it, gaining control of the kiss, earning a couple shy whimpers from you.

Once his lips left yours, you felt them puffy and in need for more. Jake however, he pressed his lips against your neck, softly at first, but soon he also bit and sucked onto that one spot, until he was rewarded by a soft moan leaving your lips. You tangled your fingers in his long hair and softly brought his lips back to yours.

“Do you want to go out with me?” Jake whispered in-between kisses, running his hands down your sides.

“I would really like that,” you whisper back to him, catching your breath.

With one last soft kiss, you could feel him smile against your lips.

The two of you shuffled a bit on the narrow couch, but you eventually found the perfect position. You were laying on top, your feet entangled and Jake had an arm over your shoulder. You took in a deep breath and you could finally take in and analyze the scent of his body. Even though you have always been around him, this felt intimate. His t-shirt smelled of a mix of smoke, cologne and his whole body emanated a slight smell due to the alcohol.

It didn’t take you long to doze off into a peaceful sleep as Jake ran his fingers through your hair, absent-mindedly and pressing from time to time soft kisses to your scalp.

Tags: @myownparadise96, @satans-helper, @jeordinevankiszka, @littlegeekwonder, @songbirdkisses, @pomegranatecurses, @angelstraightfr0mhell, @freeeshavacadoo, @karrotkate, @mountainofthesunn, @bigthighsandstupidguys, @starshinekiszka

#greta van fleet #greta van fleet fanfiction #gvf fic #gvf fanfic #jake kiszka #jake kiszka x reader #jake fic #jake kiszka fanfiction #requested #writing #fanfiction

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mslubna · 4 years ago

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Emotional maturity

Was doing some work with youtube vids playing in the background and I couldn’t help but notice the previous three songs played were so good, so relatable... so heartbreaking. Guess what? It was a song compilation of “I really miss you” playing and damn, it sure did give me chills and feels~~~

Other than the fact that today marks one year of one of us decided that they no longer want to talk to the other which led to the break up and stuff, it is also his birthday- So please allow me to wallow in sadness for a while. Dear HH, if you ever read this, Happy Birthday. May Allah bless you always.

I don’t exactly know how to show my feelings but I still do hope that he could’ve been the one. (and sometimes I tend to come off a bit too strong when I try to express myself). I know, I know. That’s a dream that seems almost impossible now. Of course, I should definitely move on from this, and I can assure you that I am working on it. It’s just not as easy as they say- “oh, go and get your mind off it” or maybe “You should go and find another guy. Go on Tinder or Bumble! Be free!”. If it was that easy, I wouldn’t even be writing all these. I don’t do rebounds, and when I am ready to go out in the dating arena again, I pray so hard that the next guy I see will love me as much as I love him, and of course, base it on our love to Allah. Throughout the one year apart, a lot of the signs pointed to us not basing our love on Allah. This awareness made me really want to change and to become a better muslim. And despite everything that happened, I still believe that he does bring out the best of me, and is the perfect partner to be with in the journey to the betterment of ourselves.

The other day I was rereading old conversations, I realised that at some points, I was such an emotional dipshit. Totally get it now when he said that he did feel victimised at times. I wished he could’ve guided me through the betterment of me instead of leaving me like that. Wish I could turn back time and not do those embarrassing stuff and we’d prolly still be together... Let’s pray that I will indeed become a greater better half of someone in the future. Anyway, reflecting back on my behaviour, I have now grown much mature in that aspect. I pray I’ll never go back to that Lubna, the one who can’t even regulate her emotions and put it above everything else. Even my sister thinks that I am now better at controlling my emotions, and I think I deserve a pat at the back for that.

Here’s something I got off Pinterest:

What is Emotional Maturity?

- To motivate oneself and persist in the face of frustrations

- To control impulse and delay gratification

- To regulate one’s mood and keep distress from swamping one’s ability to think

- To empathise with others and feel hope

- To influence the state of mind of other people- the ability to make others around you feel relaxed and interested, at minimum, or at best, make others feel inspired, creative and more respected.

Lastly, to love someone is to try to make ourselves become a better person, even if the other person is no longer here with us. I love you, always and forever. And real love is choosing each other through all of it, every single day. Uhh. getting a lil too sappy- just finished watching To All The Boys: Always and Forever with @theblessoflife and @ofpenguinsandnebulas and I’m basically just throwing in some quotes into this post. Here’s another one!: “I’m pretty sure you can’t call in sick from a relationship”. Need to get myself a Peter and become the Lara Jean in his life. Always always choosing each other through the good and the bad.

Thank you for reading this lengthy post. I wish all of you the best <3

14.02.2021, 2am

#HH #to all the boys always and forever #lara jean x peter #Jenny Han #emotional maturity #relationships #broken hearted #my healing journey #moving on #2am thoughts #reflection

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kinglegolas · 4 years ago

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Dig a little deeper

tagged by @gcralts (tysm liibby! 💞✨💗)

1. do you prefer writing with a black pen or a blue pen? black

2. would you prefer to live in the country or in the city? city

3. if you could learn a new skill, what would it be? piano! or learn some new languages. also improve my guitar playing

4. do you drink your tea/coffee with sugar? tea - no, coffee - yes if it’s just instant, but i usually get caramel lattes when i’m out so no need for more sugar!

5. what was your favorite book as a child? when i was really little i had one of those lift-the-flap books called where’s my kitten? and i LOVED it

6. do you prefer baths or showers? i do love a bath but i always end making them too hot and i start sweating lol so showers

7. if you could be a mythical creature, which one would you be? a witch babey!

8. paper or electronic books? paper 100%! electronic books hurt my eyes

9. what is your favorite item of clothing? i have a really nice blue cable knit jumper that i love! also just love a good hoodie!

10. do you like your name? would you like to change it? not really. i think i would like it more if i could go by stevie but everyone has called me steph my whole life so it’d be weird to change. but if i could fully change my name i’d change it to alice bc it was my nana’s middle name and i just think it’s a nice name!

11. who is a mentor to you? i can’t really think of anyone tbh? i think there are quite a few people that seem to really have their life together and i’m just like wow could never be me but i admire them a lot, like one of my best friends is just fully living her best life and i want that lol

12. would you like to be famous? if so, what for? yes but also no lmao, i think it would suck a lot of the time in terms of like zero privacy and constantly being critiqued for literally everything. but like low key i’m always like i wish i could be an actress lmao. never gonna happen tho bc i have zero confidence anyways but whatever.

13. are you a restless sleeper? i mean i take AGES to fall asleep and it SUCKS and i can’t sleep if there are too many noises or there’s too much light and like, everything wakes me up so i guess lol

14. do you consider yourself to be a romantic person? i probably am but haven’t had a chance to find out for real lol

15. which element best represents you? earth i guess?

16. who do you want to be closer to? my brother tbh

17. do you miss someone at the moment? my family

18. tell us about an early childhood memory. playing video games with my brother (which essentially was just me watching him play grand theft auto and gran turismo and him sometimes letting me play but i sucked at driving lmao)

19. what is the strangest thing you have eaten? i can’t think of anything

20. what are you most thankful for? my friends and family

21. do you like spicy food? it depends lol

22. have you ever met someone famous? yes, i met ed sheeran for like 2 seconds outside a radio station and got a pic with him; i met karen gillan at armaggedon (basically the nz equivalent of a low-budget comic-con); and i met niall horan at a m&g before his show

23. do you keep a diary or journal? nope. i’ve tried in the past but i always forgot to write in it lol

24. do you prefer to use pen or pencil? pen

25. what is your star sign? gemini

26. do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? crunchy! i hate when my cereal gets soggy!

27. what would you want your legacy to be? i can’t answer this bc i have no idea what i’m doing with my life and thinking too much about it is depressing lol

28. do you like reading? What was the last book you read? hell yes! i just finished always and forever, lara jean by jenny han and i’m currently reading sapphire blue by kerstin gier

29. how do you show someone you love them? letting them know i’m here for them, sending them links to stuff i think they’d like/find funny

30. do you like ice in your drinks? sometimes, as long as it’s not like, basically the entire drink

31. what are you afraid of? spiders, dying, being alone forever (lookin’ highly likely lol)

32. what is your favorite scent? vanilla, lavender, the smell of rain

33. do you address older people by their name or surname? first name mostly i think?

34. if money was not a factor, how would you live your life? a LOT of travelling!!! also buying stuff for other people

35. do you prefer swimming in pools or the ocean? neither bc i can’t swim lol

36. what would you do if you found $50 in the ground? Depends on the context. If I found $50 on the ground but I know that someone has lost it, I give the money back to the person. If I don’t know whose money is that, I keep it to myself. (keeping this answer bc same)

37. have you ever seen a shooting star? did you make a wish? yes and yes

38. what is one thing you would want to teach your children? don’t every be afraid to express your emotions, let them out. whatever you’re feeling is valid (keeping this bc same)

39. if you had to have a tattoo, what would it be and where would you get it? i want to get a daisy tattoo, either on my wrist or below my inner elbow

40. what can you hear now? well i’m listening to the wallows so that

41. where do you feel the safest? home

42. what is one thing you want to overcome/conquer? honestly i just want to find out what i’m supposed to do with my life lol

43. if you could travel back to any era, what would it be? idek either some time in like the 19th century or just like, the 70s or 80s lol

44. what is your most used emoji? “🥺”

45. describe yourself using one word. kind

46. what do you regret the most? god, a lot of things lol

47. last movie you saw? at the movies it was knives out (which was NOVEMBER LAST YEAR WTF), but not at the movies was to all the boys i’ve loved before

48. last tv show you watched? survivor lmao my flat mates and i are OBSESSED

49. invent a word and its meaning. i’ve not got the energy to be creative enough to do this rn lmao

tagging: @obiliviate @impractical-matters @poscidon @padmeamdala @euphcme @captleia @grayson-dick @ewangmcgregor + anyone else who wants to do this (feel free to ignore! x)

#tag games #about me

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holidcy · 5 years ago

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i am actually embarrassed to say how long this intro too me to write out ? so im not gonna say it ! it’s not like it took be 3 hours or anything 👀 . and for what ? idk because this intro is a mess . but anyways ... i’m mia , i’m a whole twenty years old which really just feels like a glorified teenager but whatever , we’re not here to talk about that right now . we’re here to talk about my lil baby holly . guys she is literally the sweetest human ever ? but also ? to sensitive for her own good and really the good of those around her ? very happy feet energy coming form this girl . but without further ado , below you can read up on holly & if you wanna plot give this a like . also my discord is 𝖒𝖌𝖐'𝖘 𝖜𝖍𝖔𝖗𝖊#9789 if you wanna plot there or just generally chat !

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐈𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐏𝐓𝐇

full name: holiday elena addams nickname: holly ( she’s basically turned this into her name , not one really calls her holiday ) , holls , elle ( by her parents ) birthday: june 3rd birthplace: chicago , illinois hometown: highland park , illinois ( although the family home was located in highland park her parents would in chicago and holly even attended private school in chicago ) residence: new york city , new york nationality: american ( est. 1999 through birth ) ethnicity: english ( maternal & paternal , 50% ) , polish ( maternal , 25% ) , spanish ( paternal , 25% ) religion: catholicism orientation: heterflexible ( she claims being straight but in all actually she’s not closed off to anything despite not having much experience outside the opposite gender ) languages spoken: english ( fluent , first language ) , spanish ( fluent , second language ) , polish ( conversation , third language ) , mandarin ( conversational , fourth language ) . father: leandro oliver addams ( 49 years old ) was born & raised in chicago , illinois by a politician / businessman & a philanthropist . leandro went on to take a little bit from both of his parents as he is a highly esteemed business tycoon as well as being regarded as one of the most charitable men in the world . ( relationship: there has never been a day that has gone by where the two didn’t get along . if there is anyone in this world who gets holly it is her father . truly , daddy’s little girl . the two of them are as thick as thieves . ) mother : susanna renee addams ( nee daniels ) ( 48 years old ) was born & raised in long island , new york . the daughter of a hedge fund investor & a stay at home mother . susanna grew to be an amazing cosmetologist and which the help of her father’s amazing business mind she was able to start up a salon in new york city . she gained the most devoted clientele , loving every second of her work . she took a break for almost a decade before deciding to return to the beauty industry . today she has salons across the globe in chicago , los angeles , toronto , london , and new york city . ( relationship: susanna often had to play bad cop when it came to parenting and because of this the two butted heads quite often whilst holly was growing up . despite this , her mom is her role model and the two have always had a friendship that underlined their mother - daughter relationship . ) social class: upper education: attending new york university ( s. 2018 ) she spent her first year of university at usc , she’s majored in creative writing at both universities career: author ( her book is a coming of age mystery called privilege that she’s recently admitted to writing the full book during a coke binge ) , internet personality , philanthropist , socialite , and student notoriety: being apart of the prominent addams family , amassing over 32m followers on all social media platforms , publishing a new york times best selling book at the age of seventeen . weight: 120lbs height: 5′5″ hair color: brown ( with blonde highlights ) eye color: brown positive traits: benevolent, high spirited , extroverted , romantic , honest , affectionate , intelligent , friendly , ambitious , passionate , approachable , charming negative traits: immature , vain , garrulous , critical , sensitive , stubborn , inattentive , naive , sarcastic , obsessive , insecure , impractical , irritable likes: anything strawberry flavored , flowers , driving fast , pink , watching the first snow fall , birthday parties , lips gloss , netflix , sunkissed skin , dogs , peanut butter , agatha christie , redecorating , driving with the windows down , long plane rides , denim jackets , taco bell , orange juice , makeup , sports , female empowerment , online shopping , fresh berries , roller skating , photography , writing , tea dislikes: liars , driving in the snow , coffee , having no siblings , deep water , bad drivers , body shaming , pizza , hateful people , being rushed , cuss words , repetition , disloyalty , being alone , horror movies , dentists , silence , cheap perfume , criticism , the unknown , traffic , wine , poptarts , small spaces , hobbies: reading with a hot cup of tea , video editing in the back of a car , smoking before bed to help fall asleep , going out to eat with her parents , napping , hiding alcohol in her bedroom , painting alternate universe cartoons , attending big soirees , stashing drugs in jewelry boxes , sleepovers with her closest friends , talking the dogs on walks , early morning instagram lives , old disney marathons , scribbling in a notebook while snuggled up in bed chara inspo: olivia baker ( all american ) , leila faisal ( all american ) , tan france ( queer eye ) , elena gilbert ( the vampire diaries ) , dorothy gale ( wizard of oz ) , lucy pevensie ( chronicles of narnia ) , lara jean ( to all the boys i loved before ) , elle woods ( legally blonde ) , jeffree star , jenny humphrey ( gossip girl ) , cassie howard ( euphoria ) fashion inspo: vsco girls , bella hadid , megan markle , rihanna , selena gomez , perrie edwards , emma watson aesthetics: ghostly sounding music playing as background music to a pen to paper , eyes widened at the chance to do something positive , the annoying beg for approval , infectious energy , a pout so crippling , the swell of regret as you sneak a bottle into your bedroom , tanned skin tousling with silk sheets , big eyes threatening to shed a tear , the zip of a pink mclaren

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐄𝐑𝐀

holly is the only child to leandro and susanna addams ( the addams family 👀 ) . she was born with not just a silver spoon but the silver spoon . the addams are a prominent american family , that are regarded as one of the leading industrialist during the gilded age . in short her families been billionaire rich for a long time and are known as one of the families to bring wealth to the city of chicago . she was incredibly spoiled growin gup as you would assume but by the grace of her parents teachings she was anything but a brat . she had being filthy rich and being an only child working against her and she still managed to be the most giving and down to earth child . from a young age holly would give her toys to other kids during play dates & ask her parents if she could donate the things she didn’t use anymore to the less fortunate .

although her father had a busying career as he took over the family company just a year before holly was born , but in spite of that he always made time for his family . luckily her mother had stepped away from her career soon after meeting holly’s father , so she was able to be a stay at home mom and be there for every important moment of holly’s life . by the way , susanna was straight of of a real housewives show only just an overall better person ? they had dinner together as a family every night , threw parties at the house for every big moment in holly’s life . everything from birthdays , graduations , academic honors , to becoming captain of the cheerleading team and everything in between warranted a celebration in the eyes of susanna and leandro .

she grew up extremely sheltered , mostly because her parents wanted to keep their little girl well their little girl . they didn’t want the world to taint her . she went to church every sunday and even wednesday nights , if she wanted to have a sleepover it was always at the addams household , and her parents met the parent/s of every kid she befriended growing up .

despite their attempts her parents couldn’t shield her from one thing . getting her heart broken and at sixteen she experience her first bout of heart break . the boy she’d falling head over heels for just stopped talking to her one day , with no rhythm or reason he moved on to another girl with a blink of an eye . she couldn’t understand why ( pst ? it was because she slept with him and that was all he wanted to begin with ) someone could be so cruel an play with someones heart like that . it was her first experience of how the world could really work and in all honesty , holly couldn’t handle it . she got her hands on her parents bar room in the house and would literally drink every night before bed so she could sleep .

this soon turned into her going to parties , promising her parents "i just want to hang out with my friend , i wont touch any alcohol” and her promise was always kept , she didn’t touch alcohol at these parties instead she smoke weed and on the chance one of her friends had it on them she’d do a line .

this double life , if you would , didn’t lead to any real issues , at least not while she was in highschool . she still graduated top of her class and even got accepted into her dream school university of southern california . it wasn’t until she was a semester deep in usc that she realized she was losing control over her life . maybe it was a mix of her derailing mental state , being separated from her parents , and the los angeles social make up . whatever it was holly wasn’t too far gone to see she needed help .

instead of going back to school the following semester holly checked herself into rehab . her parents freaked out , unaware their daughter had touched a substance a day in her life . it was a long process and took alot of owning up for her own wrong doings but after a couple months she checked out of rehab and flew out to her parents .

she had decided upon leaving rehab that her best bet directly after getting out would be to surround herself with people who loved her . during her short stint in california her parents had made the temporary move to new york city so that her mom could focus on the salon in the city , so holly transferred to new york university to continue her studies and be around her parents .

she lives under their roof , despite being more than self efficient thanks to her multiple branches of income including her trust fund but she figures there is only so much more time before they leave to go back to chicago that the more time she spends with them the better off she’ll be when they leave the city . speaking of , she doesn’t know her parents will be leaving the city in the next few months . on a positive note they plan on paying the rent in the apartment they live in for her until she finds somewhere she likes better .

today , holly is a sober ( she smokes weed here and there but it’s not a addictive so it fine 🙄 ) and happy . although due to how sensitive the girl is anything could make her snap , she’s incredibly fragile guys . like capable of having a mental break at any moment but like we ignore it because if we bring it up it’ll happen . wooo .

not so fun fact ? when she has an off day she’ll literally sit in her room holding either a bottle she had hidden in her walk in closet or stares at the coke she keeps in her jewelry box . she hasn’t used any of it but she tells herself its there as a reminder when really it’s a crutch for if she ever needs it again , she has easy access .

secret time ? she pushed her ex boyfriend of a balcony while she was drunk . this happened before she went to rehab ... perhaps you could say it was what prompted her to realized her crazy ass needed to go to rehab . ummm , it’s not acceptable and she knows this but one thing we all need to know about holly is that holly + substances + being upset = toxic shit that is always the equation and there is never another answer to it .

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

a girl squad or just a squad in general really , give my baby her lil group of people please

maybe a fellow chicago native ? who she dated in highscool and you know is the one who dropped her like a hot potato after she slept with him

ex hook ups

frenemies but more like a blair & lil j circa season 1 situation ?

someone who just doesn’t like her , but like she does everything she can think of to get them to like her

an unrequited ting were he’s leading her one so he can sleep with her ?

or maybe someone has a crush on holly but she just doens’t have the heart to tell them she’s not interested so now here she is kissing and OMG YUP NOW SHES SLEEPING W THEM ...

someone she races ? she loves cars especially fast ones

a we hang out and watch/obsess over sports but the whole time i can’t help but think about how hot you are kinda vibe ?

someone who is v bad for her and they know it but she doesn’t care because she like them so much & he likes her too but knows he’ll hurt her ?!

someone who sees that she might be teetering on falling off the wagon ( maybe they were over her place and saw the stash of substances all over her room ), maybe they’re trying to get her to stop smoking weed bc they feel like for her that’s a huge gateway

smoking buddies where they literally just hot box cars together and munch on taco bell talking about why sound vibrates & shit

someone who she used to party with & be wild with ( could be from chi or nyc because she visited alot as a kid ) and now they feel like she’s a lame bc she’s sober

she’s a good influence on them ? they’re a bad influence on her ? ride or dies ? partners in crime ? only friends when there is a substance involved ? sugar baby vibes ? unlikely friends ? flings ? crush ? friends with benefits ? everytime they are around one another its a fight ? someone she lets crash at her parents place sometimes ? someone she’s backstabbed but like she got tricked into doing it ? anything fluffy , anything angsty ... reall just anything you got , i’ll take !

#wealthyhq:intro #❛ 🍒 ── 𝐅𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐃 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑. / intro.#did i proof read this ? the lucky conch shell say ...#NO

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