#by which i mean will and abigail
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aceoflights · 1 year ago
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Oh the dynamics of "I've become a worse person for you, but it's worth it"
"I have a strict moral code, but I've killed for you"
"I know doing this will pull me into an unending cycle of violence, but I'd do anything to protect you"
"This will haunt me forever and destroy me from the inside out, but it's for you"
"I have actively covered up murder for you, and it has me questioning everything about myself"
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spitblaze · 6 months ago
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gnc and butch women (cis AND trans) and transmascs are punished for performing masculinity past certain thresholds of arbitrary attractiveness because people that cishet society categorizes or clocks as 'women' are not supposed to perform masculinity. hope this helps 👍
#spitblaze says things#this is the last thing im ever gonna fuckin say on the topic. im purging this stupidity from my brain once and for all with this post#there is an intersection of transphobia and misogyny here and idc what you wanna call it but to deny its existence is weird to me#transfems' hypervisibility means they have a lot of recognition but its absolutely not a privilege#transmascs' invisibility means they can stealth and fly under the radar easier which is better but not by a lot#and the assertion that nb people have to 'pick a side' so we can decide how to treat them is fucking ludicrous#there are absolutely differences in our treatment and our needs but a lot of it boils down to the same shit.#we are women when they want to deny us agency. we are men when they want to deny us support. this is true for everyone under the umbrella#and it's MEASURABLY worse when you're not white#anyway. im kinda over leftist groups who spend all their effort arguing about theory instead of doing anything in practice#so the next person who claims butch lesbians have 'masc privilege' or that transmascs dont actually face any sort of unique oppression#is getting smacked with a heavily vandalized copy of abigail schrier's Irreparable Damage#like again idgaf what you call it. you can just call it 'transphobia and misogyny' if you want im not a cop#ive just seen too many people who claim that it doesnt exist at all and im done with letting this take up brainspace#so im hanging up this sign and leaving. goodbye#i saw us go through the exact same shit with bisexuals and asexuals and gay men and frankly im not thrilled that its at my doorstep again#we go through a lot of the same shit but different populations do in fact need different kinds of support. thats it
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guinevereslancelot · 1 year ago
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anti-transphobia · 8 months ago
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Everyone posts about how Stardew Valley is a cozy LGBT+ inclusive game but NO ONE mentions the lack of a platonic option for the bachelors/bachelorettes. Which would be good for aspec people and also just more pleasant for many casual players I believe but that's not even the point. I just want to become best friends with everyone and not only does that require me dating everyone at once and feeling like a sleazebag because of it (ik the bad cutscene can be avoided but I know in my heart they'd be hurt if they knew) BUT it also means the women flirt with me!!!!! Constantly!!!!!!! It makes me sick to my stomach. Truly ruining the characters I liked
#this post is not that serious or meant to be an Analysis or a Discourse Post or a Hot Take or whatever#i just think the dating thing needs to be handled differently#i should be able to Not Date characters and still get 10 hearts with them#also ive never made it far enough in stardew valley to marry someone and this is the first time i could even date someone#and ive heard that the flirtatious comments dont stop once you're married which is. really awkward for me#i mean i could probably handle the guys flirting with me while im married but id hope being married would be an off switch for it#its just awkward to have ppl im not actually dating and only gave a bouquet to so i can be their friend be called my bf/gf when. they're Not#i seriously need to find some kind of mod to fix this once i finish getting all the girls up to ten hearts#i will deal with the stomach churning grossness of the flirting for a while so i can see everything#but then I'm DONE!!! I'm DONE!!!! I just want my friends back!!!!#maru and abigail and haley !!! my buds!!!#NOT emily shes scary and NOT leah because we just didn't click and DEFINITELY not penny because i fucking hate her#penny sucks. penny dni#but yeah the flirting feels gross because im gay and repulsed by women romantically/sexually#and even though i did open myself up to this by playing the game. because i dont want it it feels like its being forced on me#which makes it feel even WORSE than normal#and its like. not only do i feel like I'm stringing along these characters#but i feel like my friendship with my favourites is ruined :(
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lollipopsie · 9 months ago
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going crazy. goobbye.
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garashir · 7 months ago
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and if I name arthur morgan’s horse vane after charles vane what then?
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candyn-gutz · 5 months ago
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POINTS. THE QUARRY. i was unwell abt that game for awhile last year
YEAH ‼️‼️ im gonna be unwell about it for a while too i think... my cousins forced me to play and we just finished the last chapter in the morning since im leaving today orz it was really good...
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metanarrates · 11 days ago
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speaking of villainess isekai have you read not sew wicked stepmother? genuinely curious about your thoughts on that one
it's one of me and my fiancees faves actually 🥰 i haven't checked in on it in a hot minute but it's pretty cute. abigails supreme autism swag is continually enjoyable as hell and it's got some takes on childhood trauma and beauty standards that i found pretty decent. as in most rofan cases I'm not Fond of the "we have to free ourselves from the detestable corset" or the jealousy plotline but I'm also glad there's canon yuri so it balances out. also shoutout to sable for being the only neglectful husband/father character I've ever seen with a backstory that legitimately does a good job explaining why he's like that + gives him room to grow without underplaying the ways his behavior hurt abigail and blanche
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korixae · 2 years ago
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watching hannibal for the first time and they so clearly want each other
EDIT: no stop wait she helped her dad kill them they’re like a little fucked up murder family with the cannibal dad, the murderer empathiser/ murder enjoyer dad and the murder helper daughter. this show is so sick i kinda love it
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rearranging-deck-chairs · 5 months ago
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hang on are cougars like panthers
#'the cougar also known as the panther' SCREAM#dont mind me rewatching carmilla as a side effect of my newfound interest in vampires#you'd think it was renewed interest in vampires but no#i actually have never been all that interested in vampires as their own thing i was just gay#and i dont think carmilla really explored the concept itself#like A* in using the medium. D or whatever in exploring their subject matter#actually tbf their subject matter was lesbianism so. again probably an A. they knew what they wanted and they did it well#idk how letter grades work tbh#also not actually sure how much they got into the vampire thing which is why im rewatching to check#bc i was reading iwtv and i was like damn carmilla left stuff on the table#but i also think a lot went over my head#even just english wise im a little stunned at how much i didnt catch. like i was fluent in 2015 for sure but. you do keep learning words#also carmilla is like a popculture remix and i dont have a lot of popculture knowledge so a lot of that went over my head too#now i have just enough to know that im missing a lot#like theres a line in s1 where laura goes 'im living with a vampire. an honest to lestat vampire' and like. never caught that#bc i didnt know how the fuck that was fhkjghgh#but anyway im watching s2 and laura's like 'vampire seductress here is just crabby bc im not falling for her 17th century idea of game'#and like they keep calling armand Ancient right? but carmilla is not much younger#just the difference in framing is what made me start thinking abt it all#like carmilla is 400smth and laura is aware abt that to joke abt it and probably thinks it's a little hot but then you think abt how they#depict that kinda age with armand like what he says to madeleine. 'how do you go on when everything from your era is gone'#and sure carmilla has that loneliness but DAMN. like fuck. shes been doing this same trick. being like the abigail hobbs to the dean for#centuries? i mean there was that century or idk how long where she was buried alive or whatever. but THAT TOO#like damn fuck!!!!!!!!!! ive been going through the fanfic again this week and like there really isnt much#at least doesnt seem to be much that explores this. unless it's in all the aus bc i filtered those out (and still got them)#also interesting difference is if i remember correctly the hollstein happy ending is that carmilla becomes human#in iwtv of course like every important relationship is between vampires. and every lover turns vampire. and every vampire is a lover#sorta. bc abuse themes and stuff. so the inversion makes sense but wouldnt it have been kinda cool if she turned laura tho#anyway. can you believe they were like 'well shes a cougar thats her job and also her supernatural power' dhfkhjgkh as i said: A*
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evenstarfalls · 11 months ago
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Mutuals I've decided I want to transition away from Abby (at least online...for now) so if y'all can call me Gail instead that would be great
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bardicious · 8 months ago
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I'm writing out my superhero comic idea and it's history, and it's like embarrassingly obvious what my favorite shows are. lmao.
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stressedbeetle · 1 year ago
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The Abigail movie from 2019 may have sucked but at least it gave us this underrated nonverbal gem
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temporal-acquiescence · 1 year ago
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I'm sure there's context here but you gotta love a dumbass at this level
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xanaduflame · 2 years ago
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I'm facing a bit of a quandary. On the one hand, I'm at the end of my first year with a new farmer in Stardew Valley, which is when you start getting QoL stuff like coffee, sprinklers, gold equipment, a horse, etc. OTOH, I just redeemed my backer code for Mask of the Rose, and as of right now, you can't date Griz in Stardew Valley.
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lesbo-tuliplvrr · 1 month ago
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slumber party
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bestfriend!abby x bestfriend!reader
summary: your best friend abby calls you up for a sleepover after having not spent time together in months.
clingy!abby, friends to lovers, college!abby, college!reader, fem!reader, y/n used once, medicalstudent!abby, fluff, minor angst but mostly it's one sided, no specific descriptions of reader other than them being shorter than abby and having their hair uncovered at night
wc: 3.2k
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Abigail anderson. Your best friend since primary school. Your longest friendship. Your longest crush.
You hadn't always had a crush on Abby. Sure you loved her, but only really as a friend. That was, until junior year of highschool when her body had started noticeably changing. She started working out more, her biceps bulging through every tshirt. She had a growth spurt too, now almost towering over you. You yourself weren't that short but her stature made for a quite prominent difference.
You weren't usually shallow, But c'mon. Abby was already one of the best persons in your life; smart, caring, trustworthy. Turns out you only needed that little extra push to transform your platonic admiration for her into something else. This had been going on for 5 years and you had zero intention of ever letting her know.
It would just be way too risky, confessing something like that. What if she wanted to cut you off? What if she was disgusted by your feelings? What if being friends for so long bit you in the ass and she saw you more like a sister?!
And plus, dropping something like that on her when she was already swept up by her studies to become a doctor most of the time, would be horrible. You figured, you just had to let the feelings die. Of course it was taking much longer than expected, going onto the 6th year of having said crush, but it just had to be done.
So when Abby told you her dad would be out of town and that you should sleep over, you found yourself at a crossroads. You could go, and spend time with your best friend and it be a great night. Or you could go and be so incredibly uncomfortable hiding your feelings.
"Come on, we haven't had a slumber party in ages. I feel like we're always so busy we barely have any time for each other anymore. which is crazy for us!" Abby suggested as she spoke to you over the phone.
Yeah, totally not because I've been purposefully distancing myself to get rid of this festering crush.
You responded, "I mean , don't you have studying to do? I'll just distract you."
"Dont worry about me. Plus, you wouldn't distract me, you never do." She replied with her honey-like voice that would never cease to make you melt.
"We both know that's a lie but sure." You gave in. It was your best friend. Plus you really hadn't had time together in the past few months.
It was just a sleepover with Abby. All you had to do was act normal and it'd be fine. It's just Abby.
Abby answered the door when you arrived, immediately pulling you in a for a hug, stating how much she missed you and how long its been since you properly hung out, just the two of you.
"This place hasn't changed at all." you say, looking around at the familiar picture frames of her and her dad still plastered in their same spots on the walls.
"Yeah, we're both pretty busy all the time so," she trailed off. "You want anything to drink?" she asked, grabbing your overnight bag from you and heading to place it in her room.
"Nah, but I'll help myself, it's fine." you respond, following her into her room.
Her room has seen a few minor changes, none of which younwerent aware of though. It might have been years since you actually set foot into her bedroom, but you still saw it regularly. During your as frequent as possible facetime calls, you got to see through her camera the little changes she'd make to her walls. Even got to help in the decision process sometimes.
"It's been a while since you've been in here huh?" she asked, sitting on the edge of her bed, eyeing you as you peered at all her stuff.
"Yeah, cant believe how long it's been." you replied, distracted by the sheer amount of personality visible on her walls and desk.
Her college textbooks neatly tucked away on the side of her desk in a stack, near her pencil holder that held various shades of highlighters and pens. There were multiple pictures on the wall directly above her desk, along with many post it's of medical terms. Most of them were of her and her dad, or of her dog froma. few years ago, Alice. But right in the middle there were two of you and her. One from when you were much younger, closer to the time you first became friends and the other from your highschool graduation.
You made a mental note to take more pictures with her once you overcame your crush.
You looked around for a moment more, realising there was no mattress or anything on the ground. Sure, you slept on the same bed together before but that was when you were kids. Years ago.
"Soooo should I sleep on the couch or the ground?" you asked jokingly, secretly hoping she'd actually have an answer.
She laughed, "Oh come on, it might've been some time but we're not strangers." she joked with her beautiful smile.
Fuck.
You chuckled at this, hoping it seemed genuine and didn't expose the fear you felt of being so close to her for so long. Abby, however, noticed your shift in energy. Choosing not to say anything, she promptly changed the subject.
"Alright, what's for dinner?" she got up from the bed and led you both back out to the living room. Grabbing the TV remote, she put on one of her rnb playlists. "I was thinking we could cook something, chat and catch up for a bit then maybe watch a movie or something."
Gosh, she'd really thought this through. "Abby I hope that you don't have outstanding assignments due while you're doing all of this," you scolded her, already getting back into the groove of things.
She sighed, "Uugggghhh no, mom. I'll have you know that I am actually very ahead of my assignments. And even if I were behind, I'd still wanna be hanging with you tonight."
You looked at her with a raised eyebrow as she came around your frame to hug you from behind. You forgot how physically affectionate she was, and how much you missed it. You tried to not lean into it too much. The last thing you needed right now was to give yourself any false hope.
"I just- I really need this right now," she said with a sigh that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, dropping her head on your shoulder. You were so caught up in your own thoughts and feelings that you hadn't even stopped to think about how stressful school and everything must be for her. You turned your head slightly towards her, faces mere inches away from each other.
"I really need this right now and you're so fucking tense that I can't even give you a proper hug!" she stated, attacking you with tickles.
You screamed in laughter as she jammed her fingers into your sides, not giving up her mission to make you laugh. You tried running away but her grip on you was too strong, as expected of abby. Your attempts, however, did lead you to toppling over the couch, with her on top of you. She continued tickling you as you laughed, both smiling wide.
Through squeals and breaths you tried to reason it her, "Okay! Okay stop."
"There she is," she smiled, finally halting the tickles. You looked up at her, trying so very hard not to grab her by the collar and kiss her stupid.
She sat up, straddling your hips as you still lay on the couch, breathing heavily. You raised your head slightly, looking her directly in the eyes.
Gathering her breath, she started, "Okay. Now tell me, what's going on with you?" she asked, pushing her flyaways behind her ears.
Confused you asked, "Me?"
"Mhmm, you've been all distant and weird around me for quite some time." she supplied, hands resting on her thighs. her big, muscular thighs. snap out of it!
Shit, she noticed. "I-" you didn't know how to respond.
Worry evident on her face she continued, "Did I do something? Because if I did you gotta let me know, i- I've been so focused on school and-"
"No! no, n- it's not anything you've done. don't worry" you answered, "I guess I've just been feeling a bit...." you pulled something out your ass quickly, "lonely, lately."
Not entirely wrong. It was gonna have to work.
"I'm sorry." she replied, empathy clear on her face as she leaned forward to hold your arms. "But hey, I guess this came at the perfect time then huh? You won't be lonely tonight, I'll make sure of it. 'kay? Now let's go make something and you have to tell me everything that's been going on with you." she pat your thighs before coming off. Her weight would be a missed presence on your lap.
The music played at a comfortable volume as you two easily maneuver around the kitchen, cooking up a simple pasta dish. You talked about anything and everything, fully catching each other up on what the other had missed in their lives. In all your attempts at dodging her and keeping your distance, you'd forgotten why you two were best friends in the first place.
Abby was easy to talk to. She always knew how to cheer you up and how to comfort you. As did you to her. When you would hang out, there was always fun to ensue. Which is exactly why you fell in love with her. But as you were here, having chopped and prepared all the other ingredients and awaiting the water to boil, dancing and laughing around the kitchen hand in hand with Abby, you decided that just for tonight you could forget the complications that having a crush on Abby would cause and just lean into your best friend whom you missed so much.
When the meal was done, you both retreated to the couch where you sat closely next to each other in search of a movie to watch.
"I feel like nothing looks good," Abby stated, as she kept scrolling through the site.
"We could always hate watch something?" you suggested cheekliy, knowing that Abby was already not a big movie person and that it would be an utter waste of time for her to watch one that wasn't good.
"Ha ha very funny." she deadpanned, "What's that one you always wanted to watch when we were younger? Let's just watch that."
"Are you sure? Because you'll have to put up with me quoting almost the entire thing. And singing all of the songs." you weren't really asking seeing as she had already found the film, Tangled, and was ready to press play.
"I'll be fine pumpkin."
She hadn't called you that name in years. It was nice to hear it again.
As promised you quoted almost all of the movie, under your breath though, so as to not annoy Abby too much. It was more like a light whisper/lipsync. Unbeknownst to you, while you were thoroughly enjoying what was one of your favourite movies ever, Abby hadn't even been paying attention. She'd been looking at you for the majority of the film's runtime, only looking at the screen when you turned to look at her and found her not focused enough.
"You're missing important character development here Abby, he bought the apples for maximus!"
After the movie you both cleaned the dishes, then went to her room.
Another thing you forgot to consider in all your rumination, showering. You and Abby weren't the shower together type of best friends but it was definitely a 'not a big deal if we see each other naked' type of deal. So you'd often change into and out of clothes in front of each other with no problems. If the whole night so far wasn't gonna do it, this would be the fucking nail in the coffin. Abby, changing out of her clothes, right in front of you.
You didn't want to come off as suspicious by clearly turning away but you also didn't want to feel like a perv and look at her in her underwear, knowing full well that you wished it were under different circumstances. So you opted for casually directing your attention to somewhere else in the room as she stood naked a few feet in front of you.
"I guess I'll go in first," she annouced grabbing her towel and leaving the room.
You let out a breath you didn't realise you were holding as you quickly undressed and wrapped your towel around your body. You sat at the edge of her bed and waited for her to be done as you tried to calm your nerves.
It absolutely did not help your nerves when she stepped out of the bathroom and into her room, glistening from the shower. Muscles on full display, unbraided hair cascading down her back while some stuck to her face. She looked like a goddess. You quickly got up and headed into the shower, leaving her in her room to change.
It was like the more you decided to just let go of your feelings for Abby, the more she'd do things that made you fall for her all over again. You ended up taking way longer than usual in the bathroom, mustering up the courage to face her again while also trying to steady your heart rate.
Finally exiting the bathroom, changed and ready for bed, she closed the door, took off her bedroom light and hopped in right next to you. At first you both stayed silent, staring up at the ceiling, before she broke the silence.
"I'm really glad you were able to come," she expressed, turning on her side to face you.
You mimicked her position, scooting a little closer to the middle of the bed. "I'm glad I did."
You stared into each other's eyes for a moment, really taking the other in, before you spoke up again.
"You said you really needed this, what's going on with you?" you asked, poking a finger into her arm.
She looked down at where you touched her arm then back up into your eyes. Sighing with a smile, she responded, "School has been kinda stressful I guess, but to tell you the truth, I just missed you." She scooted closer to you, moving her hand from under her head to caressing yours.
No. She meant that as a friend of course. Do not get your hopes up again.
"You're tense again." she pointed out, hand still laying on your hair.
God, why was she so perceptive?!
"No I'm not?" you scoffed. Your deflection did not work on her.
"Yes you are. You've got that look in your eye again," she continued caressing your hair, "What's going on up there?"
You sat up, pulling away from her touch. She followed you in sitting upright on the bed.
You knew that lying about everything being fine would not work any better than it's been all day, so you figured you'd at least give her something.
"If I tell you, you might not want to hang around me anymore."
She looked at you incredulously. How could you ever think something like that? "Did you kill someone or something?" she teasingly suggested with a laugh, that being the only plausible situation in her head. She didn't miss how you looked at her, amusement absent on your face.
"Sorry, I just- no matter what it is, I won't stop being your friend y/n." she said seriously, one hand moving to touch your thigh.
"Please don't, because if I tell you and you really don't wanna be associated with me anymore it'll just hurt more." you barely got out, eyes becoming teary. You knew you were scared of something like this happening. Your increasing heartbeat and glassy eyes further proved just how terrified this made you.
If Abby wasn't worried before, she certainly was now. "Hey, I get to decide who stays in my circle and who doesn't okay?" She cradled your face.
You shook your head, still not giving into confession. "Everything's gonna change and I don't want it to so let's just forget it."
"If things have to change...then I'll just make sure it's for the better." How could she be so reassuring without even knowing what was going to be said? She held your chin, tilting your head to look at her.
With a sigh, you finally gave in, "I feel so much..love.....for you..since high school. And it's only gotten worse recently. I swear I've tried making it go away, I've tried so much. I don't wanna be a bad friend by springing this on you but i also know that trying and failing to hide it isnt doing me any favours either so.." Tears were streaming down your face, your sniffles becoming the most prominent sound in the room.
"And now because you know, things are never gonna be the same and I just wish I'd been better at hiding it. I wish I never had these feelings in the first place. Then this wouldn't be happening and I wouldn't have to lose my best friend right after we had so much fun together."
Abby was silent. Staring into your eyes, her expression unreadable. She looked down into her lap, a small smile growing on her lips, before looking back up at you.
She leaned forward till there was barely space in between the two of you. Abby glanced down at your lips then back up to your eyes, making it clear what she was referring to. "Can I?"
Your heart rate was through the roof. There's no way she wanted this too. "Are you not.. worried about how things are gonna be between us now?"
"I said I'd make sure the change was for the better, didn't I?"
"You can."
In what felt like zero time, Abby carefully crashed her lips onto yours. Her lips were soft, her touch gentle. It was exactly what you imagined this to be like.
Gently pulling away, she wiped your tears with her thumb, looking at you with so much love in her eyes you swore the rest of the world would now be void of it.
Through sniffles and smiles you apologized, "Sorry hah, I'm a mess."
"Did you really think I couldn't love you?" Abby asked, holding your face in her hands. "I've loved you before I even knew what love was, pumpkin."
Her efforts to wipe your tears were now fruitless, your eyes pouring out streams of emotion.
She pulled you in for a hug. This time, a proper one, without the weight of what could have been laying on your entire being. You shared one more kiss, Abby then kissing your forehead as you both lay down to finally sleep. A sleep void of worries and stress.
You were actually hers.
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soooo sorry if that was basically 95% buildup for 5% payoff. I totally wrote this in a whim at late hours of the night. anyway, hope you enjoy. requests are open! to those whove requested, I am working on your stuff so have no fear :>
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