#by we i obviously mean croatia

[skijumpingyeah]

holy fuck i think we might actually be winning eurovision this year

[cierraonline]

the way ur so obviously hurt by the pazzi asks it's hilarious 😂😭😭

girl boo

Anyways I know this week has been hard for most of us due to the election results. But I just want to say as women we are powerful, fearless, and adaptable. We are not going to let this man and his clan break us because we believe in a future where every tear we have now is going to be the strength that helped us fight later on. Like Kamala said just because we didn't win this battle, doesn't mean the fight is over. We know who our opponent will be JD Vance once Trump is over and we know who our victorian will be Kamala Harris. So until these four years are over be safe, stay strong, and don't give up.

XXXXXX

Europe Special Part Two

Chapter four: europe special part two

warning:  none

masterlist link | previous chapter | next chapter

"We're in Croatia!" Aliyah cheers, her face lighting up with excitement for a brand-new day of exploring.

"Boss Lady, take a picture with me!" KK dashes over to where Sasha is standing with Azzi and Nika, grinning.

"You're going to be doing this all day, aren’t you?" Sasha says, looking down at the slightly shorter girl bouncing around with boundless enthusiasm—a quality she'd come to expect from the lively freshman.

"Yup!" KK suddenly hops onto the team leader's back, holding her phone out to capture their reflection in the elevator’s mirror.

"Kamorea?" Sasha asks, a hint of exasperation in her voice.

"Yes, bestie?" KK beams, still perched on the 5'10" young woman's back.

"Get off me," Sasha deadpans, wanting to stand up straight—and mostly not wanting KK to be clinging onto her back a second longer.

"I’m kinda comfortable, you know?" KK adjusts her arms around Sasha's neck. "I feel like this is bringing us closer, strengthening our bond—"

"Now."

"Yup, okay." KK jumps off without hesitation.

XXX

"I love to travel and study people. Each year we've come here, it’s been different." – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

"Paige, where are we going?" Nika asks her best friend and teammate as the camera follows behind them.

"We’re about to go ziplining!" Paige replies, and they finish their little announcement with a playful spy pose, fingers pressed to their lips.

"That was corny," the camera pans to Sasha, laughing at her friends' dorkiness.

"So corny," KK chimes in.

"KK?" Sasha turns toward her.

"Yeah, bestie?"

"Back away from me," Sasha says, nudging her forward.

XXX

We start to see who takes on the leadership role and who wants to stay a follower. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

"It’s time to be honest with ourselves!" Sasha addresses the team, gathered in a huddle. "We... no, wait. Not we—you all suck at rebounding. You’ve been bad at it every year. Aren't you tired of it? Failing to rebound means you have to work harder at every other position on the court."

I don’t like the toughness of this team. I don’t. The only player here with real grit on the court is Sasha, but that's because she’s a perfectionist and thrives on competition. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

XXX

"Why are you crying, Q?" Sasha asks, walking over to a freshman on the bench, who’s quietly tearing up from a minor injury. "This isn’t high school. This is college and professional-level ball. Hits are harder, the game’s faster. You need to handle playing in these conditions because this is how it’s going to be from now on."

"Do I think they’re a good group? Yes. Do I think they get along? Yes. But that was the same as last year. Something has to change for us to have a different ending." – Chris Dailey, Associate Head Coach

Everyone who knows me knows I just want to play. It’s not about games in August and Europe; it’s about the national championship in April. – Paige Bueckers, Guard

XXX

"I refuse to go another year where the same five players are on the court for 40 minutes with no breaks while there's two or three rows of players sit on the bench," Sasha declares, looking firmly at her teammates and the coaching staff. "That’s why we got rid of some players. Our starters can’t slow down halfway through. Not anymore!”

There’s gotta be something worth all this that we’ve been through.– Nika Muhl, Point Guard

This is who we are. This is who I am. And because of that, our team will get an identity. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

XXX

"Geno says coaching is about teaching you all something meaningful. So, let’s go over our three priorities," Sasha stands in the middle of the huddle. "Nika, what’s the first focus?"

"Pick up," Nika responds, spot-on.

"Ayanna, the next one?"

"Guard your player."

"KK, the last factor?"

"When the ball is in your hand, you shoot," KK answers confidently—yet incorrectly.

"Inez, correct KK’s mistake," Sasha shakes her head, prompting.

"Shoot, pass, drive," Inez replies with the correct answer.

"KK, repeat it," Sasha turns back to the freshman.

"Shoot, pass, drive."

"Again."

"Shoot, pass, drive."

"When the ball is in your hand, what do you do?"

"Shoot, pass, drive."

“Each game we play over the next 12 days, we’ll be assessing and making corrections. For this game, I’ll be evaluating quick plays, and corrections will be given. If you can’t follow them, don’t expect to play in the next game," Sasha announces with authority.

On the sidelines, the coach and player duo of Sasha and Geno watch the action, analyzing players’ strengths and weaknesses. Right now, Nika has the ball, with three opponents close on her heels. Realizing she can’t make the shot with them so close, the Croatian player passes the ball to Aubrey, positioned nearby.

"Get a layup," Geno commands, and Aubrey successfully makes the shot. In the next play, Q manages a steal and has a clear path to the net. Sasha counts the seconds as she races across the court, measuring her speed.

"Good, Q!" The team cheers as the freshman scores.

"We need to get her moving faster, or at least able to take the shot from the two-point line," Sasha remarks to Geno, who nods in agreement.

"We’ll use this preseason to push them from a high school to a college level," Geno says, spotting a chaotic play forming on one side of the court. "Drive it!" he shouts, as Ashlynn Shade, one of the guards, hesitates with the ball. She quickly passes it to Aaliyah, who moves closer to relieve the pressure, but the opposing team intercepts, scoring a three-pointer.

"Ashlynn, go ask KK what we do when the ball’s in our hands!" Sasha calls to the player as she walks off the court. "I don’t know what that was out there, but I don’t want to see it again."

We have a lot of work to do. Some things were good—I think our transition offense was strong. The freshmen’s effort level is good. – Chris Dailey, Associate Head Coach

"Thank you, freshmen!" Sasha claps, acknowledging their quick plays, ball control, and long-range shots.

"It was so cool—our first game as Huskies!" Ashlynn says excitedly in an interview, with Quadence Samuels beside her.

"I know," Quadence responds. 

"It was exciting."

"I didn’t… I mean, I did and didn’t expect to play because I’m a freshman, and Sasha is intense. But when she called my name, I thought, 'Okay, here we go,'" Quadence adds with a laugh.

XXX

"Aubrey needs to work on ankle strength; if her knee shifted just a little to the left, her ankle would’ve snapped," Sasha observes as Aubrey completes a layup.

"Hey, Q, bring Aubrey over," Geno instructs the freshman.

"By March, Q needs to be a skilled, confident player. Right now, her instincts are strong," Geno remarks, watching her progress.

The freshmen who joined us in June stand out—they’re fearless. They don’t hesitate; they play, and they keep going. They want to learn, and that fearlessness is refreshing. – Chris Dailey, Associate Head Coach

XXX

"This is KK, a freshman," Caroline Ducharme, a guard, introduces her teammate with an arm around her. "She’s from Ohio."

"But..." KK shyly smiles.

"But she came from Wisconsin." On the court, KK skillfully makes a layup.

"What took you so long to make that layup?" Geno laughs, congratulating her.

"Sorry," KK apologizes, a bashful smile on her face as she walks to the bench.

"Jump by bending your knees, not by putting weight on your ankles," Sasha instructs as KK passes by.

"Okay, Sasha."

Every freshman class is different, and these three have a solid understanding of what’s expected of them. They’re gym rats—they love it. I was here Saturday afternoon, and it was just Sasha and Quadence, throwing shots and looking to Sasha for tips. They love to play, they’re competitive, and they’ll add so much because now no one has to play 40 minutes. Watching them is just fun. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

I don’t think there’s a way to describe the feeling when I was cleared. The first rush was pure joy, and then this overwhelming sense of satisfaction for working as hard as I have over the past 12 months. It’s changed me, made me grow up in so many ways. I’ve been counting down the days until I could play again. It’s gone by so fast, and yet it hasn’t. Finally hearing those words, it meant everything. Throughout the season, there was so much turbulence—a real roller coaster. Having to sit on the sidelines, watching and only being able to say things without actually being able to do them, is the worst feeling as a teammate and partner. You just want to play, help your team, support them when they’re struggling. Sitting out is one of the most painful things for an athlete. I just wanted to play in the NCAA tournament. – Paige Bueckers, Forward

Knowing Paige and how much she wants to play, I think it was a mature decision on her part. At her level, both on and off the court, there are always people trying to influence her. It’s my job to make sure the right people are in her ear, that she knows who has her best interests at heart versus those with their own agendas. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

"Go put on your knee brace," Sasha stops Paige from stepping onto the court.

"My knee’s fine, baby," Paige replies, unsure why she needs to put on the protective gear.

"Put it on, or you don’t step on the court," Sasha insists, turning her attention fully to her wife.

"But there’s nothi—"

"Now." Sasha’s tone is firm, brooking no argument.

"Yes, honey." Paige submits, heading to the bench where her knee brace is waiting.

"Are you going to do an interview for the special?" Geno asks, gesturing to the camera.

"Nope," Sasha shakes her head.

"Why not?"

"I don’t feel like talking about my basketball journey," Sasha shook her head. "It’s nothing but pain, misery, and pretending everything is okay. Meanwhile, inside, I’m wondering why I even get out of bed." With that, she walked away, heading back onto the court.

Sasha and I have been side by side since she was a little girl—she's honestly like my fourth kid. I've watched her through every milestone in life and basketball, and her journey hasn't been a pretty story. When I first met her, she wasn’t even let on the court—no one believed in her. But the moment she and her mother walked up to me, asking for permission to play in a youth boys' AAU game, I saw something special in her. With Diana, I had four years to create something magical. But with Sasha, we built something never seen before. By the time she hit double digits in age, she was already labeled an All-American. But to get there, she had to take some hard punches. There were plenty of times I was sure she was ready to quit the game for good. But one day, the tears stopped, and it was like a new fire was born in her. She got faster, smarter, and stronger, and I don’t think anyone was ready for it—I sure wasn’t. For those first few months, it was as if Sasha was teaching me as much as I was teaching her. Since then, we’ve never been apart. Her parents trusted me completely with her, and she’s lived with me and my family since she was eight, only going home for the holidays. Together, we’ve achieved what some players don’t reach until a decade into their careers. But it’s come with a heavy burden. – Geno Auriemma, Head Coach

"Some of the coaching staff say Sasha James is the heart of the team. No. She’s the heart of the women’s league." – Chris Dailey, Associate Head Coach

taglist @allaboutnayeli @zendayasredbottoms @tacoboutstuff @jules19sstuff @siyuziii @danc1ngqu33n @christiniawcb @riddlette13 @thebignunfun @xxloveralways14 @lordfarquad-k @rhearipley-69 @danversrailme @amberg1998 @zzzz-zzz1 @htttpcasti @lidiyabest @wwelovergirl @lesbianpoetess @jamiemundy7773 @pixelorange06 @steampunkprincess147 @brbblog123 @h3artss44le @harajukub4rb1e @billiesrighthand @averette98 @hedidnotpleaseme @unknown5397 @girlyglitterprincess @sunwalker355 @akiracutie @pinkandlilacroses @bennybabyyy @pbueckerslover @pbueckers @okimreadynow @blackbarbie96 @blue-whiteuc @randomhoex @tyler-adaline @espersonalsj @hidden-kay1 @kayckeny @chip-the-teapot @woso-scotland @rickflagfine88897 @amourrnini @hon3y-girl @apreer @stfuzoeyy @50shadesofdeville @rebecca-woso @yourmom-25s-blog @lxonix-ac @kaliblazin @klexiasblog @selenalei @thenewprophecysworld @areyourlightsup @billiesrighthand @lordfarquad-k @rhearipley-69 @vvaaaall @dandelions4us @kluvsspongebob @bratyee @bilssharky

[lowkeiloki]

been having a lot of fun with blockbench in the past few days, i made a few animals i wish were in minecraft (im not good at colouring in mc style so they remain flat coloured)

some info abt the mobs under the cut

so we know minecraft is an enviromentalist game and has been prioritizing interracting with mobs without killing them and i feel like tumblr is the only safe space where i can say i agree with that, so no useful loot dropped upon killing any of them, youre gonna have to be nice

River otter

neutral (will only attack back once like pandas)

spawns in small groups in rivers

can be bred with eggs

sometimes spawns holding a nautilus shell which it will happily trade for some salmon

hostile to tadpoles, baby turtles and drowneds

definitively tied to an achievement that has a cheesy "otter" pun in its title

African penguin

passive

spawn in groups on stony shores

can be bred with raw cod

will lay eggs as blocks like turtles, always lay two eggs

occasionally will dig through a gravel block if they find any nearby, pulling out an item, it's mostly something unamusing like sticks or flint, but rarely they might find pottery sherds or iron nuggets

Puffin

passive

out of the existing biomes, i think stony shores would be most fitting for them to spawn in, but i'd like to propose a new biome, cliffside (tall steep mountain right by the sea) it would look something like this

also would like to propose a new fish, sandeel (might make a model of them) which can be fed to puffins to breed them

if fed enough raw cod or salmon, the puffin will sit on players shoulder

when sailing with a puffin on shoulder, the boat speed will increase, regardless if in water, on land or on ice (thought that might be a more practical version of the proposed penguin function)

Pine marten

a rare mob that spawns in old growth taigas

passive, will run away from the player on sight

can be made trusting by feeding them apples, trusting martens will not run away and will follow a player holding apples or either kind of berries (which they can also be bred with

bringing a trusting pine marten to a village will increase the amount of emeralds gotten in a trade (this may sound random, but its actually a reference to their cultural significance in croatia)

hostile to chickens, rabbits and baby turtles

Red panda

passive

spawns in bamboo jungle

can climb bamboo and doesnt take fall damage

hurting a red panda near villagers will make them do angry particles like with giant pandas

can be bred with bamboo

by this point i had a hard time thinking of a function, but aparently they need to have one or else minecraft players get angry (because cuteness and whimsy is not enough APARENTLY /j)

will occasionally break a bamboo block theyre holding onto, but they never break the bottom block so the bamboo keeps on growing (could be used for bamboo farming)

Lemur

neutral

spawns in small groups at treetops in jungles

hostile to any kind of illagers and scare off ravagers

can be bred with pumpkin pie

dance to music discs (i mean obviously)

Albatross

passive

spawn rarely over cold and frozen oceans

if fishing with an albatross flying nearby, the player will get a status effect that increases their chance of finding rare loot (it stacks with luck of the sea)

can't be bred

Whale shark

i can somewhat understand mojang not wanting to add sharks because they dont want to encourage kids to kill it by making them hostile, nor to encourage kids to interract with sharks by making them passive, but a whale shark is RIGHT THERE

passive

spawn in deep warm oceans

will consume any floating item they encounter

after consuming a certain amount of items, they make kelp, seagrass and corals around them grow

can't be bred, but might spawn as pups

[froidefille]

Day 7: the best of your OTP *

📚 Bond by Anna Fugazzi **

Draco/Harry, 174k, M, OOTP compliant ***

Summary:

Yet another one of those Harry And Draco Are Forced To Be Together By Something Beyond Their Control And Then Stuff Happens Leading To Twoo Wuv stories. Because every HD writer has to write at least one.

First off, if you enjoy bond fics and haven't (somehow) read this gem yet - oh boy, are you in for a treat. This was the very first bond fic I've read so for me it's an archetype of the trope, sort of like an exemplary model. It has it all - the very veeeery slow enemies to husbands to lovers, excellent plot, worldbuilding and the writing style to die for.

I asolutely loved the bond theme of it and how we can slowly see the boys start to trust each other and how they become friends and each other's Persons’. What I also loved was how believabe the characters were. It was absolutely enfuriating to read how Draco stays true to his beliefs but at te same time, exactly that has made him an excellently-sculptured character. Plus, it makes the final resolution so much sweeter :')

I also have to mention the way intimacy is handled in this fic, because it was so down-to-earth and realistic. In the story both boys are sixteen year olds, forced to suddenly spend all the time with someone they don't even like so obviously the intimacy part was going to be tricky. Dont get me wrong, I like "and suddenly they were kissing" just like any other girl but I LOVED reading how getting intimate was actually difficult for the boys (well, one of them xd) and how they've overcome this (and boy, they have, don't worry 😇).

Oh and also the h/c elements were delicious 💔.

I have already read this fic multiple times. I have this tradition that I read it every summer (and every other about-Christmas time actually) so I have many memories reading it: in uni during English Lit lecture (oh irony haha), on the bus stop, on the beach in Croatia, in my parent's house, in office at work.

I also remember when I was only learning English (lol) and so I have listed every word I didnt know the meaning of from the epilogue to my English notebook (I still have it somewhere!). So yeah, this fic has taught me the word spouse and expression rotten luck xd

Thank you for today’s prompt @hprecfest and until the next one!

* I really appreciate this prompt’s wording as „the best of your OTP” allowed my autistic black-and-white brain write about just one fic as it obviously is one of the best. My OTP happens to be one of the most popular ones hence there is at least a dozen of my personal bests of (some of which are included in the other day’s prompts but some just have to wait for another fest. There's simply too many 😅).

** I actually planned writing about this fic on day 3 for not-on-AO3 prompt as I’ve read this fic on FF.net like, 10 times minimum. So I wrote the whole rec and just before linking FF.net page I thought, let me just check if it is DEFINITELY not on AO3.

And guess what. It is. And I have it bookmarked xd

*** So many adnotations for this one, sorry! Anyway, I wanted to make sure you are informed – Anna writes on her dashboard that she is not tagging her works on AO3 – so tread carefully!

[misdre]

now that nobody cares anymore

quick. post esc song&artist opinions

albania (titan): this was originally in albanian and it was.. alright? then they chose to send an english version to malmö. you lost me there

armenia (jako): i liked the colourful background in the live performance. nice roosters. this is just all cute and bubbly and so is the vocalist. that's about it

australia (one milkali (one blood)): poor australia, i really like the song. could have leaned in a little more to the whole aboriginal thing because that's obviously what makes this stand out as absolutely unique. they had one of the most interesting vocalists of the year but the live just didn't do it, not for me and apparently not really for anyone. then again i think it's kinda nice australia has achieved a status where they can comfortably NQ because it's no longer like Hey let's vote australia just because they're on eurovision and it's haha crazy. i think the song is better than some of the earlier ones they've qualified with though. bleh

austria (we will rave): oh you silly austria. the studio version of this was my early favourite together with rim tim tagi dim but the music video scares me and uuuhh the live? yeah uumm about that. kinda surprised it even qualified tbh. well! the song's still a banger. straight from the swedish banger factory but let's not talk about that. there will never be a day when 90s eurodance stops being the shit

azerbaijan (özünlə apar): erm. kudos for the traditional singing. i've heard this exactly once from start to finish (in SF1) so idk. let's put it like this: not THE most boring ballad this year

belgium (before the party is over): i like when he sings BEFORE THE PARTY IS OVER

croatia (rim tim tagi dim): meow cat please meow back. this is the most My Kind Of song this year, the kind i'd love and listen to outside esc too, favourite from first listen. people are being annoying about him not winning but whatever, coming second is very sexy you know. and you know what else is sexy

cyprus (liar): ORIGINALLY……this went in the same basket of "some girlboss with a sexy song idk" as malta and georgia and whatever who else… but then it kind of. got stuck in my head. and i kinda ironically started liking it. and then not so ironically. it kinda slaps? i have no excuse

czechia (pedestal): the song is good with a nostalgic kind of comfy rock sound. unfortunately it wasn't very strong live so into the NQ basket you go. i fucking love aiko's look tho i'm kinda homogay for her

denmark (sand): well…. this song's not BAD… but also just not very interesting. i got nothing. except sand in my

estonia ((nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi): that title means "we don't (really) know about (these) drugs". i always have a soft spot for estonians and this year they TOO just brought all party and fun (and finnish-made folk instruments!). the live wasn't very good imo and i think juries agreed but eh IT WAS FUN! EVERYONE HAD FUN. A PERFECT CHAOTIC MATCH TO WINDOWS95MAN

finland (no rules): SEE ME SLAYY. this was such a surprise winner in UMK, i was shook for a moment back then but ever since it's felt sooo right. so right. finland bringing in just the right kind of chaos every year and i'm very proud of it. the song genuinely grew on me over this spring, originally it felt like a jokey addition to all the "proper" UMK songs… ah how the turn tables. it's hilarious too that windows95man isn't even a musician and henri just kind of half-accidentally became his singer because they needed some vocalist for the song who can hit the notes. now they're probably hitched together as besties forever. did you know the performance is a reference to finnish mythology where the world is born from an egg

france (mon amour): just two words. JE T'AAAAAAAAA A AAAAAAAA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIME okay actually a third word also. king

georgia (firefighter): um. see malta below

greece (zári): i like marina but got nothing on this song

iceland (scared of heights): i'm sorry hera……… you're like an aunt who's just doing some jammin' in the karaoke on a cruise from turku to stockholm. mildly embarrassing but you just can't hate her

ireland (doomsday blue): CROWN THE WITCH CROWN THE WITCH CROWN THE WITCH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGGHGH

italy (la noia): don't have much to say other than that i like the song, angelina is great, the performance was a bit boring. would have wanted stuff with her hair like the music video. but it was alright

latvia (hollow): daddy dons with one of my favourite voices this year. his blue armour outfit was a bit weird and unintentionally comical but it's okay. i really love this song and that's why they call me The bitch who likes the ballads

lithuania (luktelk): banger, love it, immediately takes me to the club. bass on the studio version bops. silvester is beautiful, loved his chunky outfit with a comically dramatic silhouette. poor guy was traumatised by having to perform after a Certain individual in the final, would give him a massive chunky hug. life's not fair but luktelk luktelk

luxembourg (fighter): imagine coming back to eurovision after decades and this is your performance. i think the song is alright, would have preferred if it were all in french. the live is an absolute nothingburger. i don't even remember what the staging looks like

malta (loop): UM sorry. i don't even remember this GJKNDSGJBSDG

moldova (in the middle): i.. kind of like this song? like the dadadadaddaa part? but not very much. it's surprisingly catchy for being so forgettable. and non-qualifying

netherlands (europapa): woww wasn't the final such a great show and a good time! i'm so glad he came fifth! a televote favourite too! yay! :)

….in other words that "it's now or never" got a bit too real. i wish to hug joost's chunky blue suit and cry a little. hoping he'll perform soon in finland since he seems to be making a song with käärijä and all. btw nice of bambie thug to bring dustin the turkey back to life as a dutch EU bird

norway (ulveham): i'm so shocked this came dead last, i thought it'd find its audience for sure. earlier in spring people hyped this to the point of some complaining it's overrated, god that aged like an avocado. the vocalist is adorable and sings (shouts??) like a mofo, there's a witchy vibe with a metal band, the lyrics read like a fairytale, it's in norwegian (their FIRST song in norwegian in idk how many years, over 10). ROBBED

poland (the tower): a cute little song, i like it! the performance aesthetic was on point but i started jokingly associating the song with my 4kingdoms rei (it started from the tiger's eye line.) and then the joke got not-so-jokey and so umm yes. and like our finnish commentator said: how nice of luna lovegood to try being a musician

portugal (grito): portugal just doing their portugal things like every portugal year. iolanda is cute.

san marino (11:11): this is the only NQ song that was robbed IMO, not only a genuinely nice little rock bop but the staging was one of the most fun ALL this year. you got dancers in pink skeleton onesies on stage and you don't even make her qualify? die

serbia (ramonda): imma fall asleep on that rock

slovenia (veronika): pre-show i somehow thought this would be a bigger deal than it turned out to be. then it just kind of. well. i actually like the song and thought raiven looked fucking sick on stage crawling around with that murderous look, she's welcome to kill me any time in the middle of a dark forest at night (bambie thug will prob be there also. ulveham playing in the distance. luna is taking notes)

spain (zorra): what absolute fucking icons, i stan this 56yo queen getting on stage to sing about whores being awesome. the song is a certified bop and they got men in corsets serving a plateful of ass, i don't even need anything else from eurovision

sweden (unforgettable): i have a masochistic relationship with melodifestivalen where i watch it every year while knowing full well i'll be disappointed. i was, again, disappointed. but after seeing what a disaster this year turned out to be, well first of all, good on sweden for not sending a swedish artist to represent this mess and having a couple of norwegian bois on instead, secondly, by the time the final came around i no longer had any hate in my heart for this because who cares. marcus&martinus are our little denim brothers and i wish them all the best

switzerland (the code): nemo is adorable, amazing, lovely, phenomenal, a legend, 100% deserving the victory, spinning like a beyblade while singing opera what more do you want. like WHO the fuck sings like that while doing some kinda acrobatics on stage in a short skirt. nemo does that's who

UK (dizzy): another embarrassing year for UK, wasn't it. they sent an actual superstar and he just kind of sang like shit and nobody cared. i don't like the song it genuinely annoys me, the performance was weird kind of gay, i dunno. sorry olly it didn't click

ukraine (teresa & maria): being ukrainian also i'm not much of an objective opinioner on this one. definitely preferred the live version over studio, it's breathtaking. jerry heil is sooo beautiful and what a voice. queens

funny how one day you listen to some new little songs without even knowing what country's entry it is and by the middle of may they're all my beloved friends.

[selkiesstories]

Nice post on the Anti-Semitism in HOTD and while I don't think it was their intention to do that, I can't deny that their progressive politics (both GRRM and Condal/Hess) makes them susceptible to adding those anti-sematic tropes because most sects of socialism (both Communisms and Fascism) are imbedded deeply with anti-Semitic and Anti-Christian doctrine. The Soviets, the Chi-Coms, and the Nazi - even the British as well - have both anti-Jewish and anti-Catholic ideologies baked into their cultural make up, some till this very day.

I could say that the portrayal of the Greens are just as filled with Anti-Catholic tropes as Anti-Sematic, but anyone who studies history knows that both go hand in hand in a lot places in Protestant dominated areas of both the past and present West.

To add to your post, I would say that Daemon exemplifies the Nazi trop of the Uber-Mensch - Super-man - who believes in the supremacy of himself due to his race and holds no religion but the idea that he is his own god and cannot be judged by the moral constraints of the "Normal People". GRRM and his rewriting deification of Daemon in later editions of Westrosi history has veered dangerously close to these Nazi tropes.

And while his aim was to write a character "in equal parts heroic and villainous" - his nihilistic writing and philosophies along with his progressive politics have set him on the path to the Fascistic fetishizations that we're starting to see from the left-wing in the West in the revival of Nazi authoritarianism and attitudes under a different more 'compassionate' guise. As wells as the moral good being relative and self-principled rather than the divine ideals of Jerusalem wed to the philosophy of Athens, and the civilized social orders of Rome.

With all the current day bullshit of "Anti-Zionism" - which we all know what they really mean, even if they can't admit it to themselves - it's hard not to see the anti-Semitism in a lot of things. But I do think that GRRM, Condal, and Hess's bullshit politics make them incredibly vulnerable to falling into Anti-Jewish storytelling based on progressivism being built entirely on anti-Semitism and Ant-Christian values.

They wouldn't even question it.

Oh I definitely don’t think it was intentional if only because I think the show runners have only the most shallow knowledge of history if that. Doubtless what little they know is of the-why should we learn about Henry VIII just because he’s a white man?- variety. I agree that they lean towards the ideological purity of the Communist rather than the racial purity of Nazis, and because most of academia never fell out of love with Stalin the way they did with Hitler this is seen as a good thing. (Obviously ideological vs racial purity is an oversimplification since the two got hopelessly muddled but it’s a good starting point) The rest of s2 certainly made it plain that Condal & Hess have never heard about Ravensbrück or really anything about women and Nazism besides the tired “the Nazis were misogynistic”.

I didn’t really get into Daemon but you’re right, maybe at some point I’ll do a post on the Aryan tropes I’ve noticed with them.

Personally I find it fascinating that Nazism is so often conflated with Christian nationalism since historically it was very much not the case. There were places that is was such as the Ustaše in Croatia, but Nazism very much downplayed Christianity to the point where Wilm Hosenfeld wrote in his diary in 1944 that the youngest German soldiers had no real concept of Christmas. There’s probably a great paper on Nazi anti Christianity as an expression of Nazi antisemitism especially if you can work in the overlap with antisemitism and anti Catholicism vis-à-vis Protestantism as Christianity to Catholicism’s Judaism.

Thanks for the ask!

[because-its-eurovision]

hello friend I have decided on my top 5 ESC entries this year and I need your psychic witchcraft skills to tell me which ones are gonna do well and which ones will break my heart because they'll be slept on </3 :') my top picks being Finland (obviously), Slovenia, Switzerland, Moldova and Romania 😌✨

hello friend very nice yes yes <3

Ok, this is based on the songs themselves, the charisma and live singing skills of the performers, their spot in the semi, the current betting odds and my gut feeling that's usually wrong :') Most of the stagings are still a mystery as the rehearsals only start in a week. Here we go 👇

Romania: Dead on arrival, unfortunately :< I see no way of this qualifying. Early in the running order on one of the worst spots, their bestie Moldova is in the other semi, the national final performance is messy, trashy and confusing and it's mostly sung in a language nobody understands. Theodor seems lovely but even "cute boy" votes aren't going to help as he is against Denmark, Cyprus, Greece and Slovenia.

Moldova: I believe in Moldova! They are often overlooked by the fans and betting odds and then blow up the televote on Esc stage seemingly out of the blue, last year being the most prominent example. Pasha is charismatic, a great singer and has Esc experience beforehand. Moldova is more often than not great with staging and I see them qualifying with ease as they only have to beat five other countries. Outside top-15 in the final though, maybe like 18th or 19th place? Just a guess.

Switzerland: I've been told people will be taken back because the lyrics seem hypocritical coming from a neutral country, but lyrics have never had that much meaning as most of the viewers hear the song for the first time on the night, and half of Europeans don't speak English at all, not to mention fluently enough to understand sung language on the first try. The first semi has only 15 songs and only two of them are pure ballads, this and the Netherlands. To put it lightly, the latter has not been great at the pre-parties 😶 Remo on the other hand may be the best male vocalist this year. I see Switzerland qualifying with flying colours and getting a high jury score like Austria 2018, Netherlands 2019 and Switzerland 2021. Could even win juries, but not the whole contest.

Slovenia: Cute, funny and charismatic guys that the fandom has fallen in love with <3 Great vocals, great energy on stage. Their spot in the running order is not ideal and the other ex-Yugos Croatia and Serbia are in the other semi, but they do perform after Poland which counts for something. There are many worse perfomances in their semi so I believe they'll qualify. No idea about their placement in the final though. Maybe around 20th, but could surprise us with a great result.

Finland: Most likely wins televote in the semi, getting 12 points from at least Norway, Sweden, Netherlands and Germany. Depending on the spot in the running order and how much, if at all, Sweden's new staging is going to affect their chances, I see this going two ways. Either the juries go their usual route of hating a silly Eurovision-y uptempo and destroy the chances by placing Finland outside top-ten like they did with Moldova 2022 and Norway 2019. OR they could appreciate the performance, melody and originality of Cha Cha Cha just enough to place it in third or fourth place like they did with Israel 2018 and Italy 2021, and that combined with a landslide-ish televote win would mean Finland winning. I still think Sweden is going to win, but Finland hasn't ever even qualified three times in a row and just getting in the top-5 would be incredible. Even top-3 is still in the realm of realism, but of course Käärijä would deserve to win it all 💚

[onlyonewoman]

Sometimes I feel like we forget how fast the world has changed in 34 years and how we keep forgetting that it's not really about the time, but the vast gap between what was possible in 1989 and 2023. I was 6 years old and probably doing some autumn themed stuff in kindergarten November 9th 1989, like gluing leaves on a paper or drawing mushrooms. It was a Thursday and I was too young to know about the Berlin wall or the fact that there were two Germanys. After all, I lived way up north in Europe and the first news from outside my country I can truly remember seeing, was the horrible Romanian orphanages with pictures of children kept basically in cages. I knew nothing about world wars or any wars for that matter and since my parents weren't metal fans, I obviously didn't know about a German band called Scorpions either. In 1989, I didn't know that the big map of Europe in my sister's geography book was about to change completely. The 90's recession hit hard and getting new books to schools wasn't easy, when thinking about how suddenly, we had 19(!) "new" countries instead of Soviet Union, East and West Germany and Czechoslovakia. Think about it! We went from these 4 countries: - Soviet Union - East Germany - West Germany - Czechoslovakia to 18: - Armenia - Azerbaijan - Belorussia (now Belarus) - Czech Republic - Estonia - Georgia - Germany - Kazakhstan - Kirgiziya (now Kyrgyzstan) - Latvia - Lithuania - Moldavia (now Moldova), - Russia - Slovakia - Tajikistan - Turkmenistan - Ukraine - Uzbekistan And then, barely 3 years later, when I was in third grade, the Yugoslavian war started and the maps in our then new Geography books went obsolete again. 1994, Internet wasn't yet a thing and we got classmates from countries we'd never heard of, learning that there was no longer a place called Yugoslavia, but in fact 6 to add to the increasing list: - Slovenia - Croatia - Bosnia - Herzegovina - Kosovo - Macedonia For a long, long time, these 24 countries were 5 and what little a kid would know about them, came in the shape of already obsolete world altas books and tv news we were too young to understand. Suddenly, many of us got new classmates from these new places and the names of Bosnia, Croatia and Slovenia especially stuck. We saw pictures from Sarajevo on the news and when we turned 12/13 and started 7th grade, our new history books had a picture of a smiling East German soldier and a smiling West German woman pouring champagne from the Berlin wall. Heavy metal wasn't popular anymore but everyone and their goldfish knew Scorpion's "Wind Of Change" from 1990: "The wind of change blows straight into the face of time Like a storm wind that will ring the freedom bell for peace of mind Let your balalaika sing what my guitar wants to say (say)

Take me (take me) to the magic of the moment On a glory night (a glory night) Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams (share their dreams) With you and me (you and me)" This is not my old ass trying to tell young people here on this hellsite about the past, but time and pace - and the dangers of taking democracy, peace and stability for granted. Never in my life had I imagined another full scaled war in Europe after the horrors of Yugoslavian wars. I TRULY believed the likes of Putin and Lukasjenko would see how pointless, reckless and just... bonkers a war in Europe would be in these times. I GENUINLY didn't think I'd be listening to news of Russian soldiers demolishing a peaceful neighbor in 2022. I NEVER anticipated a Brexit and the potential risks it means for Northern Ireland, where there's been a declared, official peace only since 2007. Well, what's the fucking point of this history rambling from a 40-year-old relic? you may ask. The answer is simple. My classmates' Sarajevo in 1994, is just an older version of your collegues, neighbors etc. coming from Ukraine 2022. That my wild hope for this atrocious genocide at least will end in another Haag Tribunal, like the one the murderers like the International Criminal Tribunal for the Former Yugoslavia. I want to see Putin and his lackeys put on trial like Slobodan Milošević, Ratko Mladić, Tihomir Blaškić and other war criminals in the Yugoslavian war. Putin is just like them and there is no forgiveness and no excuses, no reasons even remotely acceptable for his war crimes. The massacres in Butja and demolition and ransacking of Kiev is no different than the bombings of Sarajevo. The images are the same and I NEED you to understand how these types of war stems from the sick grandiosity minds of despotes living in the past, dreaming of ancient "glory" because they are small, insignificant men who can't bear the thought of being slighted. You ALSO need to understand why Europe as a whole was so wholly unprepared for this. It's because we, as every other human population on Earth, really can't bear to constantly think the worst of our neighbors. We thought the times of war on this scale were behind us, not because we're better than others - HELL NO! - but because most of us thought everyone realised there were more to lose in a war than could be gained. We didn't anticipate that for the likes of Putin, "Wind Of Change" was never a song about hope for a brighter future, but more like a song of mourning.

Putin was 38, two years younger than me when the Soviet Empire began to collaps and we overlooked his crushed dreams and need for revenge - and the price he was willing to pay himself to go for it. Volodymyr Zelenskyj is 5 years my senior, one year older than my big sister. I try picturing him in 1989 as an 11-year-old, sitting in a classroom somewhere in Ukraine at the same time as my sister did, 10 years old. How both of them in their respective language had geography lessons with suddenly obsolete maps and how what was merely a piece of information for my sister, was reality for Volodymyr. Volodymyr in 1989 had no idea he'd one day lead Ukraine through a war as horrendous as the one that would break out in Yugoslavia 3 years later.

This, my youngsters on this precious hellsite, is why you can't declare people over 25 out of touch or ignorant or unable to change as soon as we don't live up to whatever standard of Internet purity setting the mood for the day. I NEED YOU TO KNOW HOW MUCH THE WORLD HAS CHANGED! I need you to understand how difficult it is for a small human being to know which leg to stand on at times, that it's okay to be wrong and that walls will be built and torn down, old contries dying and new ones rising in their ashes in what a while later will seem like a blink of an eye. I don't have to imagine Volodymyr or my sister hearing Wind Of Change on the radio in two different countries, not knowing English well enough to understand the lyrics and definitely not knowing how much the world would change before their eyes. I don't have to, because I was there too, just a few years younger and still gluing autumn leaves on paper with my classmates in kindergarten. And at the same time, somewhere in Sarajevo, a girl who'd become my friend and classmate in 4th grade, didn't know she'd see her hometown bombed to ashes and move hundreds of miles away, learning a new, difficult language and read the same obsolete geography book as I did - with a map that didn't show her country.

I want, so bad, for you people here too young to remember this, to take a moment and realise the nothing but astonishing changes that have taken place long before any you were born and how slow the news traveled before the Internet. Don't take this as a scolding because it's absolutely NOT! This is me urging you to be more gentle with yourselves, your peers and older as well as younger people because while history does repeat itself, it rarely does it in the same place or the same pattern. Milosevic or Putin, Radic or Prigozjin - different names but still coldhearted murderers and just as Milosevic didn't get to erase Bosnia-Herzegovina and Sarajevo from the maps, there is just no alternative in any fucking world, that Putin should be allowed to erase Ukraine and it's cities and people and culture. To all of you who's first present day images from a war in the West were those from Butja and Kiev: talk to people you know who are in their 40's and older. They might be able to tell you about the Berlin wall, the Soviet Empire and how a German rock group wrote a song that would be significant for what people hoped for when I was still gluing leaves and learning the names of the months, miles and miles away from the place where people older than me were starting to literally tear a wall down. Stand with Ukraine, stand on the right side of history and don't forget how close the past is, even when times truly seem to spin faster than ever.

[cerebraldischarge]

“Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving.” - Terry Pratchett

My right ear is still a little wonky from the loop-de-loop I did around the Catholic bits of the Second World - the doubly traumatized bits, if you will. But I don’t wanna talk about trauma again, lest I risk sounding thoroughly bromidic. But how about blue milk?

I know, it’s a Star Wars gimmick. But in the center of Warsaw, behind a towering hotel that’s so expensive it made me turn my tail and run, there’s a little place that’s simply called “the place to drink beer and vodka”, according to what Google told me about the blue neon sign above the door. (Straight and to the point, I guess.) It gave refuge to me when I was forlorn, my phone was dying and I was thirstier than a 50-year-old virgin looking at OnlyFans pages. Here, blue milk consists of: milk (obviously), white rum, and curacao liqueur, and it’s absolutely ambrosial.

Oh, that bit about being desperate. Yeah… I wandered out of my comfort zone a little too much this weekend. I’ve been to foreign places before, but written Dutch is easily decipherable if you have some idea of English, German, and how they are related to one another, so at least I could read the signs there; and even in the beach town in Croatia I could rely on finding someone who spoke at least rudimentary English when I got confused. I even liked to strike up some conversation with the Bolt drivers I hailed for succor. One of them - a handsome bald lad - told me that his best friend hung himself due to financial difficulties and that’s why he’s studying finance at university now. Another - an older gentleman - urged me to start going to church again and confess my sins. He just assumed I was raised Catholic by default - which I sort of was, but it’s not as much of a given for me as it would be down there. It was a charming interaction, albeit a little awkward - as it always is when religion comes up. My tattooist was also an older gentleman there, in Zadar’s medieval old town center, and we chatted throughout the 20-minute procedure, mostly about his interesting and very ocean-connected life. I also talked a bit with the cashier at a sex shop. (For some reason, I always end up going to these to ask for directions. Not even kidding, it happened in Munich and Berlin.)

All of that, and I mean all of it, went out of the window in Poland. Two people - the guy who made me blue milk and the hostel receptionist - understood me. The rest of them inexplicably assumed that if they talk louder in Polish, I’ll get it eventually. In the Vietnamese restaurant, I could rely on the good old “point at your order” method; in the grocery store I did not say a word, just like at home - by the way, some of their dried meat products are freaking phenomenal. As far as getting around goes, I glued my eyes to the little blue dot that was representing me, and relied on automatic functions as much as possible. Truth be told, I couldn’t read a damn thing on the streets, nor could I make heads or tails out of what was said to me, and this was utterly disorienting. It’s not like I let it stop me, but holy mackerel, it did put some things into perspective. So this is what my father experienced when he overheard me on a Zoom call (with the additional weirdness of his own offspring slowly becoming a foreigner to him, no doubt). So this is what all monolingual people go through when they get out of their little cultural bubble - or nonverbal autistic people every day, for that matter. This is the scary part I’ve been hearing about!

This gets us back to where we started - or rather, why I started: why I opened Skyscanner, completely sober this time, and clicked some buttons in the first place. Because I was bored. Because I had enough of my room and my antisemitic ancient aliens conspiracy theorist landlord and my corrupt leaders and my own little environment, and wanted something new. Well, I got it. This morning, I couldn’t wait to get back to the bitch cave. I had enough of being confused, hearing unrecognizable words, feeling alone, and all that. I did get some seriously cool cemetery photos out of it, and I met some cats, and I got closer to a bunch of squirrels than I ever dared to surmise, and I shot some guns again (http://pmshooter.pl if any of you happens to show up the area; being Easterners, don’t expect the staff to be overly friendly, but they are definitely professional and you can actually get some limited full-auto time in, unlike in my corner of the woods) - I even got a fancy bracelet made of the bottoms of .357 Magnum rounds, so I wouldn’t say I didn’t enjoy it or it wasn’t worth it, but by the gods, I was bone-weary by the time it was over.

Oh, and the beach part? I wish I could have stayed longer (I tried to ask for 3 nights but they only had vacancy for 2), but perhaps I got precisely what I went for. Namely, a moment of what felt like absolute clarity - something my skeptical, prying, curious, contrarian mind rarely allows to happen. Swimming in the ocean at sunset, I felt something enigmatic and numinous. First of all, I was no longer uncomfortable in my body. The ever-present itches, aches, stickiness, clumsiness dissolved in the water, and I was just frolicking around like a child. (Perhaps this is why I loved swimming so much as an actual child: it freed me from being a sensitive-skinned, gravity-bound klutz.) Then the waves started throwing me around like a wine cork. A thought occurred to me: This is the real world, the stuff that exists independently of humanity - and by dying, I’m not leaving it behind, I’m becoming a part of it. With this came a neoteric lightness, a beatific state devoid of wonted anxieties. I was having the time of my life bobbing up and down, half willingly, half out of control - and I accidentally drank a sip of the salty water. Another thought occurred to me: Sodium nitrite is going to taste something like this, I’ve been told. So I shouldn’t be scared of it. Yeah, it’s not my original favorite, but… At that moment, I felt like I could completely trust it and shouldn’t be afraid of failure. What’s more, this happened on Thursday evening - that is, the 17th, which is my lucky number and the start of the last month countdown to the first anniversary of my father’s death (and likely my final day, unless something else happens - I dare not to make promises anymore, for as my dear father used to say: “Man plans, and god…dammit, there’s always something in the way”). I’m not one for magical thinking, but this coincidence pleases me greatly. If I was into the pervasive mysticism of our age, I’d take it as a sign - as the universe trying to reassure me that I’m on the right track. As it is, I take everything with a grain of salt. But this experience definitely put me more at ease with my circumstances, including the one that has been a thorn in my side for as long as I can recall: the conspiracy between my ineptitude regarding illicit activities and the bureaucratic paranoia of all the governments I’ve seen so far, which results in the vexatious fact that I still don’t possess a firearm and in all likelihood never will. Before you ask - yes, I did ask around for leftovers from the 1990s while I was in Croatia, but all I got was apologetic smiles and something along the lines of “I don’t know about that” every single time. Whether that answer was honest or not, I couldn’t discern. Perhaps someone with more time, better people skills, and more knowledge of the local language could conduct a more fruitful expedition.

My budget suffered greatly, but I grew as a person. The end becomes clearer and clearer, and I’m present for the grand finale.

[kittyprincessofcats]

My favourite Eurovision entries 2023 (pre-Grand Final)

Okay so before the final I still wanted to talk about my favourite entries this year so far (important - please note that these are my opinions before the final and they might change upon seeing all performances again, etc.)

One thing I want to say this year in general is that I don’t really have a clear, outstanding favourite. There are entries I like that I would describe as “good”, but nothing that I would describle as “absolutely outstanding, clearly the winner”.

(For instance, last year ‘Stefania’ so clearly blew everything else out of the park that it was a no-brainer for me - and of course like many other people I voted three times as often as usual in solidarity with Ukraine, which is not a bad thing.)

But this year, I don’t really have that feeling for any entry. Many good ones, but nothing that I would describe as “clearly the best one”.

Anyways, enough rambling. Here are the entires I like, in no particuar order:

- Austria. A song about a writer possessed by the ghost of Edgar Allan Poe. What’s not to love?

- Finland. Do I need to explain this one? They just understood the assignment.

- Norway. It’s just so freaking catchy, such a good melody and such an epic feeling, I love it!!! (Also Norway is still owed a victory from that time the juries stole KEiiNO’s win - No, I’m still not over it and I never will be.)

- Moldova. Apparently every year there needs to be one mythical/witch-y song and this is this year’s. I love it! (Also, if I’m being salty about jury robberies already: Moldova was last year’s real runner up, so if anyone should be hosting “on behalf of” with Ukraine, it should be them.)

- Croatia. An anti-Putin anti-Lukashenko song, but with lyrics that are so abstract and symbolical that they can only be understood through several lenses of analysis, therefore cleverly sneaking past Eurovision’s “no politics allowed” rule. Also the singers are aparently activists for women’s rights, LGBTQ+ rights and against the Catholic Church. Amazing. - My only critisism of this song is that the lyrics describing (what I’m assuming is) Putin as a “psychopath” demonizes people with psychopathy and similar mental illnesses. I get that they probably couldn’t say “genocidal dictator & war-criminal” because of the “no politics” rule, but there was still probably a better word to use there. Still a song I love, but I just wanted to point that out.

- Ukraine. Dear Ukrainians... listen, we need to talk. How come you guys are just so freaking amazing and talented that you’re incapable of sending any bad songs to Eurovision? Huh? What do you have to say for yourselves? Okay no, seriously: When I first heard Heart of Steel, I wasn’t that impressed. My feelings were kind of “Yeah, this is okay, but also a bit boring.” But then I listened to it again and suddenly the entire next day, I had that song stuck in my head. Several times, I was like “What’s this song I keep singing to myself? Oh, it’s Heart of Steel.” Yeah, basically first impressions are often wrong and it really grew on me quickly. I also find the lyrics of staying strong and keeping going even in the face of hatred and “a world on fire” very inspiring - very obviously related to Ukraine’s situation and the war, but I also feel like this song (and through it, the bravery of Ukrainian people in general) can inspire all of us to stay strong no matter what life throws at us. Amazing message.

And yeah, that’s it. No, Loreen’s not on this list and I was frankly shocked to find out she’s supposedly the favourite to win... like, it’s not a bad song by any means, but frankly, I heard it once in the semi-final and have already completely forgotten it since then, so...

Oh yeah also, as a German I just want to say - I’m not going to include our own entry on this list because that’s up for all of Europe to judge (and I also haven’t listened to the full song yet so I can’t quite say if it would make this list), but I just want to say I’m glad we finally sent something that’s at least not boring.

[idiotlittleme]

Who's having a good/bad esc year (compared to the last few years):

Good

Finland

Okay so obviously, yes, Finland is having a great esc year. But we should also keep in mind - Finland average place in the last 10 years is 25 (for comparison, Sweden's is 6). They didn't qualify for 4 of them. They were in the top 10 only one time out of these in 2021 with Dark Side.

Croatia

I've already talked about how this is Croatia's glow-up year. I really believe they have a good chance at reaching the top 10. This country average score in the last 10 years is 28 - i.e. - not qualifying. Which makes sense since they qualified only twice during this time with the highest score of 13 at 2017 with My Friend.

Israel

It's not really talked about since there's always this vibe that Israel is good at esc but even with their win at 2018 with Toy, they still didn't qualify 3 times in the last 10 years and even when they did it wasn't always in the higher rankings. This year they have a chance for the third top 10 placement in the last decade.

Serbia

Another country that it always feels like they are succeeding but in reality it's not always the case. Would you believe that last year was their 2ed time in the top 10 in the last 10 years? Not surprisingly their strongest act during this time was In Corpore Sano last year that took the 5th place. And may I even dare to say that I believe Luke can go even further and take the 4th.

Austria

Like Israel they still hold their winning from 2014 with Rise Like A Phoenix, but after 3 years in a row of not qualifying, it's not really like their head is up in the clouds. And yes I think Who The Hell Is Edgar? is straight out top 10 material that can give them the 3ed top 10 spot in the last 10 since that said win.

Btw - the reason Sweden is not here, although Loreen will probably win is that it's rare that Sweden are not having a good year, they are literally the best at it without any doubt whatsoever.

Bad

Azerbaijan

Cute but oh so forgettable. And I know most people don't see Azerbaijan as a strong esc country but - the last time they didn't qualify was in 2018, and that was the ONLY time that happened in the last 10 years. And I still remember Hold Me that got the 2ed place in 2013 and was such a GREAT entry. Better luck next year I guess?

Netherlands

I honestly don't think they will qualify. Sorry. And it's a bummer since the last time that happened was in 2015. Their song is cute and all but when looking at the others in that semi, I just don't see it happening.

Denmark

I seriously hate this song. It has some nice lyrics and this boy's androgynous look has something in it, but omg it's so fucking annoying to listen to. And I'm not the only one thinking that. After two years of not qualifying I expected them to want to do better? Idk, I still hold onto their 2013 winner Only Teardrops.

Poland

What can I say that hasn't already been said about this thing? I guess it's supposed to be empowering but is it really? She just looks and sings like any other bully from high school trying to "make it big" with every means necessary (did someone say curroption in the national selection?). It's annoying, her videoclip looks like she's trying to include horny men to get more votes somehow and it's the overall vibe is mechanic as hell. Like they told AI to make them a winning act and it wrote - take hot girl, add a feminist message, have her dancing, etc. Downright horrible. Won't qualify (luckily).

If you're trying to make some top 10 material why not take a look at Color Of Your Life from 2016? Just saying.

Greece

You're a sweet boy but that ain't happening, sorry. Too forgetable, too unclear, too teenage mood song to actually make a good act out of it. Please can we have another Alchohol Is Free type of act that showed something Greek in it again?

[peachisafruit]

Recently, I've been on a trip to Greece.

It wasn't my first trip by a longshot, and surely it won't be my last. I was lucky enough as a child and up to now to yearly go on some kind of week trip, (that is if you exclude the times during covid), be it Croatia, Italy, England, etc...

What makes this trip different? Well, pretty much nothing. It wasn't life changing or mind opening. It was full of beautiful sights just like any other trip. You could feel the heat on your skin as soon as you stepped out of the plane, be it night or day, it was warm. The cities we passed through varied in architecture, yet they all had similar quirks.

It's funny how much architecture can tell you about the country and its people. The way all houses had shutter windows or AC units, to help cool the house during hot summer days. Or how they had their water tanks on the roof, so the sun could naturally heat it up to provide them with warm water.

Nature tells you a lot too, Greece- or more specifically, Crete where I was, was an island full of mountains, roads shaped like serpents, steep and narrow. You could mostly only see prickly bushes and a lot of olive trees, and I mean a lot.

Maybe I hoped the trip would be different, that I'd maybe meet someone, have that wistful 'summer love' that so many cheesy teen romcoms like to have, but I haven't. Though I'm not particularly mad about it, perhaps it would of done more damage than good. It's not like I was looking for someone in an organic way either, I'm too nervous to go out by myself with no friends, and so, tinder was my friend.

Friend is a bad word to describe this app I know. But it gave me a surge of confidence when I first downloaded it a few months ago. I didn't realize I could actually be liked by so many people and it was thrilling. I went through my first dissapointment as well, finding a girl I liked and I was thrilled thinking she liked me too, I even texted her first. But I tend to forget rationally when I get my head tangled up in romance, and obviously most people on tinder aren't looking for anything serious, or just because they matched with you doesn't mean they actually like you. But I lived, I got over my dissappointment and moved on. And I caused a dissapointment to another girl as well, I thought I liked her when we matched..but as we talked I learned that I don't. I know this will sound shitty, but I ghosted her. At the time I thought it was the better option, too afraid to actually confront her. Maybe that's how the girl I liked felt as well, maybe that's why she ghosted me. Funny how human beings tend to think alike, huh? But despite that, I still keep that app in my phone. Why? I don't know, or maybe I do. Maybe I still hope that I'll find someone for me, even if it's highly unlikely. Still, one can dream.

And that's what I hoped would of happened in Crete too. But I'm not sure why I'm desperate for love so much. I crave to be held, kissed, go on cheesy dates with someone- yet, the idea of actually dating someone scares me. Being committed to that person, scared of hurting them, scared of further intimacy, scared of-... a lot of things pretty much. Women scare me cause I'm afraid that I'm not actually attracted to them, men scare me cause the thought of intimacy terrifies me at times. But I would want to be intimate with a partner, yet I'm scared of fucking it up.

Pathetically so, maybe that's the reason why I feel so jealous about the couples around me. I see them and they seem so happy, they bounce off each other, all with their own specific quirks. And they just..work. They work together, and they look good together, and they like each other. It seems so easy to achieve for them, so much easier for my friends too. Pretty much all my friends have gotten partners this year. All so suddenly too. So I wonder why not me? Is something wrong with me? Is it my looks? I'm not perfect, I don't claim to be, hell, I admitted to ghosting a poor girl. I keep hearing the right person will come, blah blah, but what if they don't? What then? Honestly I don't know, at times, I prefer being alone, but then I have these moments where I crave I could have a partner.

So far this lowkey-essay is more about my lack luster love life then my actual trip. But that seemed to be all I could think about this summer. July is almost over and I'm still single. Maybe it's for the better, I'm going to college soon. I'll meet new people there, maybe they special someone too- or not. I'll get through it.

Maybe just because of this, I could appreciate the trip a little more. See it on my own, walk on sandy night lit beaches alone...take a trip through the palm forest with only me, my thoughts and my camera. So maybe this trip was a little different after all, or it wasn't.

Who knows.

[misdre]

my Even More Expert Than Usual impressions of this year's eurovision

faves:

australia (promise): this grows on me more and more every listen, might actually be my non-finland(yes this is a word now.) favourite this year. insert a joke about australia not even being europe here. catchy electro rock metal whatever with an attractive singer, yes king

austria (who the hell is edgar): ah ma gawd. this song mad catchy.

croatia (mama SC): it's perfect. next

cyprus (break a broken heart): my guilty pleasure fave this year, a borderline boring swedish-produced turd aaand i love it. this was the first one that stuck on my first listen through all the songs. that's just how it goes in this short-term-memory eat short-term-memory world

czechia (my sister's crown): this song would be near perfect if none of it was in english, because the english lyrics are a bit too corny for me. but the chorus is in ukrainian so i feel adequately pandered to. some of it is also in bulgarian and some in russian and i forgot what else. this is the one song that i hope has a really really good stage performance because otherwise it will just be ignored by everyone

finland (cha cha cha): here's a beautiful story…. back in february. it was a sunny winter day.... i walked home while listening through all our UMK (national selection) songs in release order for the first time. and i heard cha cha cha in there, and i typed in our friend group chat: ok so we're sending cha cha cha this year, that's just how it is. that IS how it is. (and my friends didn't believe me!!!! fools. i'm obviously always right?) it's crazy it's party.

germany (blood & glitter): WE'RE SO HAPPY WE COULD DIE! germany sends metal for the first time in eurovision history and the song was recorded in helsinki, it's my duty as a finn to stan. i also read that the german national selection juries hated this but finland was part of the international jury and gave it a 12 and into esc you go. take that, motherfucks.

moldova (suarele si luna): literally only just now while typing this noticed that this artist is the same who did lautar in 2012. that's a fucking excellent song LOOK AT THOSE DANCERS. anyway! moldova single-handedly taking care of my techno folk needs. like, all any artist in esc needs to do is combine folk and techno and it's my favourite that year, i'm basic like that

norway (queen of kings): let me just go grab my viking queen sword and we can leave on a journey through the fjords.

not crazy about it but ok:

belgium (because of you): this is like. inoffensive. it's alright catchy.

denmark (breaking my heart): this is like. inoffensive. it's alright catchy.

estonia (bridges): look, on a year with almost no ballads, the only(?? idk i didn't pay enough attention) piano&string quartet ballad is actually nice. i mean i genuinely like the song, it's good. and i love estonia. they're my new favourite neighbour because sweden needs to be eliminated

france (evidemment): this is like. inoffensive. it's alright catchy. also very french

georgia (echo): would be better in georgian (or just any language that's not english) but still pretty cool. it echoes alright

iceland (power): there's this specific flavour of song this year that is, "i'm aware this isn't very good, nobody else likes this, i only see shit reviews everywhere, but this is seriously stuck in my head all the time so i apparently find it catchy and likable". this is one of those. i really be singing POPOPOPOOOOOWEER WOoOOWOO while doing the laundry or whatever the shit

ireland (we are one): same as above. basic, corny stupid lyrics. but it's the only irish entry i've liked in… uhh ever? so that's.. something.

italy (due vite): there are two types of italian eurovisions. actually good ones and then… this. the due vites. i like listening to these too but it's no soldi or zitti e buoni. i wish i was listening to soldi rn

lithuania (stay): this is like. inoffensive. it's alright catchy. oh did i say that already. truthfully my opinion of this improved several notches when i learned the ciuto tuto part has to do with lithuanian folklore. it's almost like you add folk anything to something and i automatically like it? hmm. well yes

portugal (ai coracao): shockingly catchy for portugal. it's fun and got a bit of a folk sound. did someone feed portugal illegal substances to make them send such a fun song

romania (d.g.t (off and on)): i don't fucking know why i like this.

serbia (samo mi se spava): HEWWO? 0w0 this is a weird techno banger that basically got no clear melody and it kinda fucks. the way the dude goes SPAAVVAA :) in the beginning sounds mad gay and makes me laugh every time

slovenia (carpe diem): a nice little rock song in slovenian. the language does a lot for this tbh. it's also... it's.......... it's inoffensive alright catchy

uk (i wrote a song): i liked this decently much at first but then started seeing people call it A SUPER GOOD SONG AGAIN BY UK WOW THEY DOING IT AGAIN!!!! I CANT BELIEVE THEYRE SENDING SUCH AN EXCELLENT SONG AGAIN!!!! and my own interest started dying because bitch please. this is mediocre at best compared to space man from last year. but. i'm still gonna tatta datta da dai. tatta datta da dai

wish i liked more than i do:

albania (duje): the only ethno balkan ballad this year and! it's not good. and i always like balkan ballads, so this does something wrong. the only good part is the bridge(??) with no singing.

latvia (aija): i'd want to like this more because it's a pretty cool little song but i don't so there's that

spain (eaea): don't really understand this one. i've really tried to like it because of the ethno folk sound but i just don't get it, i wouldn't choose to ever listen to this outside esc. i feel like portugal and spain switched places this year, this is the experimental artsy song portugal would usually send. mom someone mixed the iberians up in mail.

ukraine (heart of steel): it's ukraine, it's dark and dramatic, it's for the defenders of azovstal. and i don't really like it. this song just doesn't go anywhere. but i do think it's fitting for the current ukraine, so that's a plus. they hopefully are going somewhere tho

wish i didn't like as much as i do:

israel (unicorn): ok enough FEMALE EMPOWERMENT!!!! YEA!!! POWER OF THE UNICORN!!!!!!!!!!!!! shit already. there's a centaur instead of a unicorn in the music video. you had one job. one horse. unfortunately the song is catchy

switzerland (watergun): if this was any other country's song or any other year, this could be my actual favourite, i mean like number one creme de la creme favourite. but here we have switzerland, a country that actively keeps blocking aid for ukraine because We ARe A neuTRAL coUnTRy, sending some fucking. no guns!!! song to eurovision. [loads my rifle and aims it at switzerland's head] let's see about that. then again, that's not really this artist's fault, is it. most probably not

no:

armenia (future lover): a toilet break song. though the upulupuu herureruus in the chorus are pretty fun

azerbaijan (tell me more): i had to check which country's entry this even was. that's how much i care

greece (what they say): i get a chuckle out of thinking back to a youtube comment on this song's official music video that was like "WHY ARE PEOPLE SLEEPING ON THIS MASTERPIECE???". because it's shit that's why

malta (dance (our own party)): you can't try to be a new epic sax guy without an actually good song. god this is so repetitive it makes me want to DIE

netherlands (burning daylight): zzz…. zzmgffgfg did you say something? no? mkayzzzz

poland (solo): baybah. :{} did you know that one of the producers of this song is finnish. i wish i didn't learn that today

san marino (like an animal): san marino existing in some weird bubble on its own as usual.

sweden (tattoo): i don't so much have a problem with this song specifically as i have a problem with sweden's melodifestivalen being a shit turd production where the actually good, unique, swedish-sounding stuff gets shoved aside for something like Hey let's send loreen again this year because she won ten years ago and we haven't been doing so hot lately in eurovision, surely she will be sexy and get us another win. and the fact that people are just buying it. sweden, unfortunately i have decided you need to be annihilated from the planet

[joseline-woodhouse]

A couple of things, I'm starting with the disagreements:

I see that not all esc winners are flashy songs and audience's favourites, sweden winning is a prime example of this. However sweden really played into what the esc juries want to hear. A calm pop song with deep metaphors they believe to be new and a memorable performance to it. This is yet another thing we didn't serve at esc for years. Our 22 entry was a calm pop song, but it was nothing new in any way, which is obviously what happens if a bunch of +60 year olds make a last minute decision to find our original entry (electric callboy) too much to their personal disliking.

With several years in a row of the public votes favouring to beat, memorable and bold songs, I think it's a huge bargain to bet it's just a phase and the public votes actually prefer pop music songs at esc.

We need to distinguish between what the jury likes and what the audience likes. The jury as I said prefers low key creative ballads that don't dare much in terms of music and have themes of overcoming personal or problems of discrimination/war.

What the itally did 21, was to fully serve the audience's desire for something new and upbeat (huge fan myself btw).

What Ukraine did 22 was something you don't get often. They please the jury with lyrics about overcoming suffering and holding on to their mothers while being victims of a war. In terms of lyrics this was naturally big for the jury. At the same time the audience was pleased by a song that is upbeat, memorable and bold in choice of instrument as well as style.

The 22 entries?

Sweden with a song explicitly written to please the jury, Finland with one of the boldest acts esc has seen in a while and a unrivaled mood maker this year, so a true audience pleaser.

Germany?

We did a terrible choice and went the middle way. Those top points are what you want from jury or audience, we came in with an act that wasn't bold, so we don't displease the jury, that was still metal, so we don't bore the audience with something calm, that was not very brave with it's lyrics, so we don't displease the jury with something they can't play on a radio channel at all times. I could go on. By cutting out a bunch of things that could displease either side, we endet up pleasing neither.

Switzerland was more generic if you're thinking mainstream, but in terms of metal music blood and glitter was just as generic and Switzerland's entry was in terms of pop songs. If I had to guess why they got more points, it's because it's a song about overcoming war, while you need to search for meaning in ours. It was a pop song, so serving the jury. They probably didn't get more points because it sounded the same as nearly every Switzerland entry that came before.

What I agree with:

We need to change how we choose our entries. We need to stop judging our entries as if they exist in a bubble and start comparing us and ask ourselves "what can we do better than most others here, what could we double down on?" And than we need to prioritise how we want to please and especially who we want to please.

Here is Germanies biggest weakness in my opinion: Germans aren't daring. We are a nation of safe choices. Safe choices don't win. The jury is looking for something very specific we won't match, because we lack the experienced people who know the esc juries in and out. If we want public points, just look at Croatia! I loved it. Not even sure if it qualifies as a song, but it got a bunch of points by doing nothing except being bold.

We need to get our confidence back and I can see an entry written in our language helping with that. A band already popular here might help as well, but it needs to be one of the few artists that actually write their own songs. If we send one of our music industry mascots, we'll have the same people in charge of choosing the song that made us loose the past years.

I see potential as well, but it layes in trusting ourselves and not focusing on what we think will score but on what is wanted and what we are good at.

I would like to remind everyone actually reading this until the end, that my original point was that noone is withholding points from Germany out of supposed hatred, which seems to be a popular conspiracy theory on Tumblr amongst Germans right now

To my fellow Germans:

Please stop thinking that we loose at esc because people supposedly hate us.

Was our entry better than the last couple of years? Yes! It wasn't the most generic sh!t ever and our lead singer hit most of the keys he sang (all by what I noticed actually).

Was it a good entry? No! It was a sh!t esc entry. No front to the band, no front to the song, no front to the fans. Ask yourselves however: will you remember this song unprompted in a year or two? If you had heard this song for the first time and someone would have played this song to you and named you literally any other modern dark metal band as the creator, would you not have believed them?

The song is not catchy, the song is not innovative in any way, the lyrics aren't breathtaking and the chorus is straight out forgettable. I am not judging taste here, a couple of songs I like match that description. But how would anyone remember this song after listening to 25 other songs, with quite a bit of them being quite memorable?

We need to stop half a$$ing the decision who's representing us with what song and start comparing us with the other competitors.

Different point:

It's really dumb to keep thinking its because people supposedly hate us when Israel, one of the most hated countries in the world keeps performing so much better than we do in both jury and public votings.

You know what people really hate? Sore losers, and we've really been acting like the person who didn't practice for something and than complains that everyone just sucks when we end up predictably failing.

I do think Lord of the Lost are a nice bunch of people from what I know, I get why people like their song and while I wouldn't rate their song S-Tier metal, I don't think it's bad. But it's not for Eurovision.

[foxymoxynoona]

Tell Me What Changed: The Epilogue

Banner and lines by the talented @awrkive

Summary: Alex and Jungkook have been best friends since childhood –actual best friends. She is NOT in love with him, for real, and wishes people would stop assuming that. Why does no one question if he’s in love with her? Huh? But it might have to do with his successful fuckboy status, while Alex is very much… not that. Which is fine and doesn’t matter! Until Jimin’s impending wedding leaves her eager for a date and willing to put herself out there, and Jungkook can’t believe what happens next.

Fuckboy Best Friend JK x OC

CW and tags: fuckboy behavior, jealousy, pining, heartbreak, angst, bad language, explicit sex, sexy photos, alcohol, f2l, who knows what else I'm making it up as we go

Read on AO3 here or below cut

Previous Chapter | Masterlist

Four years later

“Hm.”

Jungkook nearly ran into Alex’s back as she stopped short in front of an aged metal sign. He pressed his hands on her shoulders and looked over her head at the circle with the line through it over words in a language they didn’t understand.

“That won’t stop me, I can’t read!”

“It’s pretty obviously telling you no,” Jungkook argued. “On what planet does a circle with a slash through it mean yes?”

“It kind of looks like the no parking sign,” Alex countered. “So we won’t park here.”

“Alex–”

“Come on, fuddy duddy, you tired? Besides, that guy didn’t tell us not to,” she said, and set off. 

Jungkook hesitated despite the taunting grin she threw over her shoulder. Yes, they had talked to “a guy” –an old man with a herringbone cap and a brown dog with no leash that made Jungkook long for their baby at home. The man spoke Croatian and Russian only, which unfortunately was not on the very short list of languages Alex and Jungkook spoke. After gesticulating and trying various phrases in French, Italian, and German that they’d picked up in the last six weeks, he’d nodded “ein wenig” about the German and the had traded short German vocabulary words back and forth: Berg, Burg, Brücke. 

How do we reach that ruined castle we see on that hill? That’s what they’d been trying to figure out. 

He’d pointed them up the road, but for all they knew, that meant go to hell and it was just a coincidence they’d seen an opening in the stone wall. He overestimated their German and didn’t seem confident in his own. It didn’t reassure Jungkook one bit.

“There’s a path!” Alex called back to him. “Path means yes!”

Jungkook slowed and studied the “path” she stood so proudly on, a narrow, uneven ordering of flat stones and logs. 

When he didn’t rush forward, she crossed her arms under her tits and challenged, “What’s the problem? You said we could find a way up.”

“Yeah…” He fidgeted, hands in his pockets, and tried to see the crumbling stone towers they’d spotted from the road but it was impossible from this angle through the trees. “It’s just we already got in trouble with the cops once since we got to Croatia–”

“We didn’t get in trouble, they just helped us figure out how to pay the fare.” That was true, they had actually been very nice, but it didn’t change that they’d gotten caught after Jungkook had been so confident no one would care about a couple tourists without stamped tram tickets. Oops. He still felt like an asshole.

“I don’t want to go to a European jail.”

“Yeah, me either!” 

“They won’t send you to jail, you’ll be all cute and innocent looking and they’ll call your mom, but my tats will get me thrown in the slammer and you’ll have to get the President involved to get me out–”

“I really don’t think it’ll be like that,” Alex snickered. Jungkook didn’t honestly either. The truth was just that his stomach couldn’t handle any more anxiety right now, and getting lost outside a Croatian town during an innocent after lunch stroll only to hike a random-ass mountain to see a crumbled old building and possibly break a leg or get arrested for trespassing was just not on his European bingo card. 

She sighed and hopped back down to him. She took his arms and he quickly let go of the things in his pocket so he wouldn’t send them flinging as she shook him.

“Babe.”

“Al.”

“Babe,” she said again. “I promise to do all the talking if we get arrested. I’ll do the blowjobs. I’ll do whatever it–”

“Don’t you fucking dare,” he scowled.

“But I really think it’s fine. There’s no chain across the opening. There’s a path. And I really want to.”

“Why?”

“Because we walked so fucking far on my little stubby legs after you got us lost–”

“Oh, I did–”

“And I want it to be worth it by discovering a cool secret castle.”

“You don’t even know if that’s a castle,” he pointed out.

“The guy said so.”

“Berg and Burg don’t sound different enough for you to know for sure! He might just have been saying ‘you dumb fucks, it’s just a mountain, go to hell.’”

She sighed and pulled him into a hug. He towered over her but she dragged his head down to her shoulder even though it deeply hunched him, and stroked his back.

“Sh sh sh.”

“I’m just tired of castles,” he admitted. “We’ve seen castles in Spain and France and Germany and Italy and Austria and Sweden and Poland–”

“We didn’t see castles in Poland.”

“Oh, was it churches then? Cemeteries?”

He sighed and sank down on a fallen log and spread his legs out. They hurt, and if his legs hurt, he didn’t know how Alex was still standing. Except that now as they neared the end of their eighth week backpacking around Europe, he had learned this was how she was when things went wrong. When their train had broken down in the middle of the night in a small German town in the middle of nowhere, when the hostel they’d booked in Sweden turned out to be an empty warehouse and they had to drag their things through the pouring rain to find a new place and that was right after the boat from Denmark made them so seasick, when the trains went on strike in Paris and they got stranded for an extra two days than they’d planned, when–

Listing them out, none seemed as disastrous as they had felt at the time. It turned out backpacking was fucking hard. Changing countries every three to seven days for weeks on end was fucking exhausting. And as eager as they had been to see as many different places in Europe as they could cram into this ‘trip of a lifetime,’ the castles and ruins and churches and train stations and town squares were all starting to look the same. In Prague they’d gone to visit a Jewish Temple and he’d wanted to weep because at least it wasn’t another fucking church! 

OK, that wasn’t fair. He was actually having a really great time overall. He wasn’t some big history buff or anything but it was really cool to see so many of the things he’d been forced to learn about in school with his own eyes. The Mona Lisa was way smaller and the Roman Forum was way bigger. German beer was much better and Prague clubs were so much wilder and Alex loved him so much she’d stayed out all night with him. Europe was so much older than the tourist shit they had in the States. Mostly he cared about the food, and that had been cool, even the bad meals, just to say he had. That was why they’d come to Samobor in the first place, because it was an easy day trip from Zagreb and they’d been bored and googling what to do before their epicly long train tomorrow to Greece –their final destination where they’d meet up with friends before flying home. 

“Let it out,” Alex said, taking a seat beside him. “Oh god my legs are going to fall off my fucking body. I may not be able to get back up, I’m serious. Hope you’re ready to piggy back me, beefy buns.”

“I’m tired,” he admitted.

“Me too.”

“I miss my bed.”

“It’s our bed.”

“I miss my mom’s cooking.”

“Mm-hm.”

“And you know what I miss the most?”

“What?” Her eyes narrowed, clearly suspicious, but his answer was innocent and sincere.

“Bam.”

“I know, but he’s having the time of his life with Yoongi and Joon,” Alex pointed out. “He’s their trial baby. They’re spoiling him. He may be pissed when we come home.”

“Don’t say that,” Jungkook glared. “He knows whose baby he is.”

“Yeah, mine.”

“Mine!”

“He takes your side of the bed when you get out in the morning.”

“Yeah to be close to my scent when I have to leave for work,” Jungkook insisted.

“No, because he’s my husband.”

“Our dog is not your husband.”

“It’s ok, l’enfant, you’re still precious to me too.”

“What was that? How did you say that?” he teased. It had been hilarious to learn Alex sucked harder at French than anyone had ever sucked. She couldn’t make anything even close to the right noises. It made so much sense why she had completely flunked it in high school; she’d had to change to Spanish, and she’d sucked at that too but slightly less. Jungkook, on the other hand, had been told several times by French people he spoke his freshly learned sentences like a native. And ok, fine, Alex was correct it was women who had told him that, but it didn’t mean it wasn’t true!

Alex was pouting now at his teasing because it had also been revealed that she really wanted to sound sexy speaking French (alcohol, alcohol had revealed that) and her attempts at a few new phrases in the bedroom that night had not gotten the response she wanted. He’d tried to keep a straight face! Because she looked sexy and cute as hell in the light blue thing she’d picked up earlier in the day at his begging, way too sexy for the low-budget hotel room with its peeling wallpaper and chipped wood furniture, but god her French was awful.

“What are you smiling about? You’re thinking about Belgium, aren’t you?”

“Huh? No! I was thinking about Paris!” In Belgium, her drunk French after they’d spent a late evening in the clubs had made someone think they’d been doing drugs and alerted a nearby police officer.

“Oh, when you laughed at me in the bedroom.”

“I didn’t laugh at you, I laughed at your French. Just give up. You don’t need to speak French just because French girls liked me,” he assured her with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

“Don’t gloat just because they thought you’d be a pretty plaything–”

“I am a pretty plaything!”

“So pretty,” she readily agreed, and reached up to squeeze his cheeks together. “Look at that pretty face.”

“Don’t you… want to play with me…?” he tried to prod her into making a raunchy joke. 

“You already got your ‘I fucked in Croatia’ stamp, isn’t that enough?”

He couldn’t help the chuckle. Alex had given him the “Assport” the first night they’d landed in Spain alongside a little stamp that said ‘I did it!’ to stamp each page as earned. “So you can say you fucked your way through Europe,” she’d giggled. “Even if you only get to ride the Alex-rail.” “Rail the Alex?” “Yes, your train can only enter one tunnel.” “You have more than one tunnel. Do I get a stamp per tunnel in each country?” “...No.” “A stamp when I enter and a stamp when I leave?” “Fine, whatever.” 

It was hysterical. He loved that in the middle of stressing her hair gray  in preparation for their nine weeks away, Alex had taken the time to make something so fucking stupid for him. So, to prove he was a good boyfriend who appreciated her, he’d made sure to fill her in. It. Fill it in. Well, both. Even when it meant shoving his barely hard dick into her pussy the single night they had in Belgium after he’d eaten something on their gastro tour that disagreed with him. She’d suggested a skip but he refused to let Belgium win! Now he’d always remember Brussels as the place with the pissing little boy status and also the place where he’d failed to orgasm. But she’d taken pity on him and let him finish her off with the vibrator and agreed when he insisted they’d fucked: his dick was in her body (however briefly) and she orgasmed. Stamp it.

“Ah, I love you,” he sighed and flung his arm around her shoulder to hold her in place for his sloppy kiss on her temple. She, predictably, squirmed away. Belatedly he added, “But just because I already earned my stamp doesn’t mean I can’t go again. What’s the point of illegally hiking a mountain to look at rocks if you don’t get a handy out of it?”

“Is that why your hand is glued to your pocket?” she teased. “You rock hard in there thinking about the cool rocks we’re going to see?”

He quickly pulled his hand from his pocket. “No.”

“Look if you really don’t want to go, you can stay here.”

“Why are you so determined?”

She pushed up from the seat with a groan and teetered the first few steps. 

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “I guess because we’re here, we can see there’s a castle up there, we might as well see it. I mean when are we ever going to be in Samobor, Croatia again? Probably never, right? We’ll literally never be in this place again and I don’t want to live the rest of my life wondering what the castle on the mountain looked like.”

“Or the inside of a Croatian jail cell.”

“Exactly, you get it! I’m doing it for the ‘grams.” She gave him a wink and two peace signs, as if he was taking a photo. “Or at least the stories. This is the kind of trip we’ll talk about for the rest of our lives! I don’t want to say I got all the way here and wimped out!”

That would definitely not be the story. Since landing in Europe, Alex had been more outgoing and adventurous and motivated than he’d ever seen her. At home she’d whine about standing in line at the grocery store for too long, she’d demand a piggy-back ride from the couch to the bed, when their friends would suggest some weekend trip to do something, she’d give Jungkook that look like we would rather stay at home, right? Let’s just stay home. She was a creature of habit, he’d always known that about her, he was like that too.

The addition of Bam to their family lent itself to more adventures as they started taking him on hikes. Alex walked their baby as much or more than Jungkook did –though in his defense, it was because he was working two jobs these days so Alex was around more! He’d love to be walking Bam more. God, he wished he could walk Bam right now. What did it say about him that Alex was ready to hike a mountain just to maybe see something cool –she’d been ready to brave any crowd, any line, any obstacles to see the things you were supposed to see anywhere they visited– and life-of-the-party Jungkook wanted to just go home and walk his dog. 

That made him sound like he wasn’t enjoying his time in Europe. He didn’t want to sound like that. He was! It just wasn’t exactly like he’d expected and right this moment he was tired and kind of cranky. He got like that sometimes, whatever! He hadn’t slept well last night; the walls at the hostel were too thin, the mattress was flat, and the sheets were heavily perfumed. He’d lain awake next to her in bed, comforted at least by her deep post-sex snores that she refused to believe, and worried because he was running out of time.  

He watched Alex’s back as she hiked boldly up the path and once again shoved his hand in his pockets to fidget with the box that had been nestled there for eleven countries now. Eleven countries without exactly the right moment. What did that say about him that they were on a fucking once-in-a-lifetime backpacking trip around Europe together and there hadn’t been the perfect moment? There had been so many good moments, even great moments, but not that moment. He knew he’d feel it when it was time. He hadn’t felt it yet. He was running out of time. 

He ran after her before she disappeared from view; obviously he wasn’t going to let Alex wander off into the wilderness without him. They didn’t have a scrap of navigation skill between them but at least they’d die together. He was her ride or die. That included ill-advised treks up mountains in foreign countries, apparently. 

“I can smell that you’re right behind me.”

“Can’t you hear me?” he pointed out.

“Yeah but I wanted to comment on the fact that we’ve been away from home for two months now and you still smell like you just got home from work.”

He grinned and strode around her to lead, “You do too.”

“No I don’t!”

“Hey, it’s fine. I got used to you smelling like stale espresso years ago. The fact I even know what stale espresso smells like is all because of you, babe. You’ve really changed my life.”

“For the better,” she nodded.

“Hm. You think so? You think that’s what I meant?” 

She laughed and tried to hit his ass but his backpack shielded him. 

“Whatever, at least I don’t sparkle like Edward Cullen.”

“But I smell better than he does, I know it,” he argued. “Besides, you like the perks.”

“Of you playing with bubbles all day?”

“Of the bath bombs I bring home for you!”

“Yeah until I took so many baths I got that fucking UTI,” she laughed. Apparently that could happen. Fucking around so much when he was younger had left him overconfident that he knew everything about a woman’s body; living with Alex the past couple of years –both as roommate and partner this time– had taught him so much more. 

“I do appreciate the bath bombs though,” she clarified, misunderstanding his silence. “I guess I’ll miss you coming home smelling so good all the time. You always smell like mall after Verizon shifts.” She paused to debate where the path split, but Jungkook noticed it just went around some trees and converged ahead, so they each took one. 

“Maybe I’ll keep working at Lush.”

Her answer was quick, “No. Now that you don’t have to save for the Europe trip anymore, isn’t one job enough to live on? You work so much and if Verizon can’t give you the promotion you obviously deserve then maybe you should quit both places and go to T-mobile or whatever.”

It was sweet. It was sweet that she wanted his time more than his money. It was sweet that no matter what else she teased about, she was always ready to champion his career, to rage about him being underappreciated at his jobs, even when it wasn’t true. It was sweet she thought he’d needed a second job just to pay for the Europe trip. She knew how much money he made. She knew how they split their finances. She knew what this trip cost them each. Did she really not wonder where that extra money was going?! But he believed she genuinely didn’t, or at least didn’t care enough to wonder about the math.

“Look, a handrail,” she pointed out. “They wouldn’t put a handrail there if we weren’t allowed. Doesn’t this whole place have kind of a fairy tale feel to you?”

“If we meet a gnome, my tactic is going to be to convince it you’re related so it’ll leave us alone.”

“God you’re such an asshole,” she laughed and gave him a hard shove that barely budged him. 

“It’s nothing personal! It’s survival!”

“Well if it’s a troll, you’ll be right at home.”

“Because I’m… big and strong?”

“Dumb and ugly.”

“See, but that’s not even a little bit believable,” he argued. “No one would think I’m ugly but you’re objectively short.”

“And ugly?”

“No no, that’s not what I said! You’d be so hot to a gnome. I bet he’d fall in love with you. He’ll lock you in these ruins. All the gnomes would beg to orgy you.”

“Oooh sounds kind of like Beauty and the Beast… I could go for that! I have no problem seeing past someone’s cursed, terrible, glittery, greasy, off-putting exterior–”

“Come on, you know the oil makes my muscles pop better in the photos. I get way more engagement on those posts–”

“Mmm, love my slimy boyfriend as long as he’s doing numbers. And the laundry.”

She could tease him all she wanted though because her support had been unwavering. He’d decided not to pursue a full time influencer career after all, but it wasn’t for any lack of encouragement from her. After years of building up his account and relationships with brands, he’d tried to commit to it full time for six months and wound up making almost enough to live off of, but the pressure it had placed on the way he looked and maintaining a certain online persona had driven him into the ground. Hard. Alex had scraped his self esteem back together and held him close to her chest as he eased off and found a healthier balance that didn’t hinge his self worth on how many abs you could see in any given photo. She also bought him a puppy.

Now the contents of his account were more diverse: showing off his cute dog, their hiking adventures, their lazy afternoons cooking and gaming, and sometimes funny things with Alex mixed in with fitness photos when he felt like it. He liked being hot on the internet, he just couldn’t handle it being the entirety of his life. He ended most of the partnerships though occasionally did a sponsored post if it felt natural and good. It had been a dark time for him but a deep bonding time with her. It had made him realize it was time to lock this shit down in a legal way even though she hadn’t ever once asked him about it.

That was over a year ago. He’d been the one to say they should finally make their Europe trip happen as a joint 30th-birthday celebration. He’d taken on the second job to save up the money he needed. And now… now he was waiting for the perfect moment to…

“I think we’re almost there,” Alex announced, veering ahead. 

Maybe he was stupid. Maybe that was the problem, he was trying to make something happen that shouldn’t. The same doubts that had bubbled up for the last year did so now, in the quiet of this forest. Alex had never said she wanted to marry him. They didn’t talk about it at all! When people brought up marriage, she made a joke about taking twelve years to even start dating so why the rush. Once she joked about counting down to the day they met Common Law criteria and would earn some legal property rights through that “for free.” If it came up topically, maybe in a movie they watched, Alex would insist she really couldn’t imagine being a bride and also that the wedding industry was a sham.

So it was entirely possible, he considered not for the first time, that Alex didn’t want to get married and was going to turn him down if he didn’t make a compelling case for why she should bother. By now she knew what she was getting with him, so he needed something big to help her understand why this would be good for them. For legal reasons, sure, tax breaks, but also because he just… 

“There!”

He realized she had gotten out of sight. Shit. He ran the last leg of the path and joined her in the grassy space preceding what was, indeed, a small ruined stone castle.

“We did it!” she grinned, and threw her arms around him, backpack and all.

“That’s… it?”

“Yeah, but we saw a random castle on a hill in Croatia and hiked our asses up it and there it is,” she beamed. “I wonder what it is though…” She released him and went closer but –to his relief– stopped on this side of the chain draped across the only path into the ruins themselves. Not that there was much space to go. 

Jungkook pulled out his phone; his service was definitely better here but still spotty, so it was slow to return search results. In the meantime, he followed Alex along the part of the perimeter they could reach. They could easily see all the way to the other side though.

“Maybe it was like a fort or something,” Alex suggested. “Or a storage house. Weapons or grain or something.”

Jungkook’s phone loaded a page and he quickly shared, “So, there is a Samobor Castle, but this is definitely not it.”

“What?!”

“Look, it’s on the other side of the town.”

“How do you know that? You don’t know directions.”

“Yeah, look, that’s where we got cake, and it’s that way, but we went this way… I don’t know what this is. Google doesn’t know either. This is… nothing.”

Alex looked between him and the ruins. 

“Well it’s not nothing,” she defended. “Basically we just discovered lost ruins–”

“They aren’t lost, we’re lost,” he laughed. 

“Ok, so? I still think it’s cool! Who cares if it’s not the castle, right? We got to this place all on our own without even good directions.”

“Alex,” he called as she monologued her way to the other side of the castle. 

“We saw a place we wanted to be and we went there! That is the spirit of adventure! We–”

“Alex, watch–”

“We seized the– AGH!!”

His warning came too late and he wasn’t fast enough to grab her as she slipped on the rotting leaves and went tumbling down the hill. All he managed to do was overbalance and go rolling with her. It happened so fast, both of them flailing and thumping as they tried to grab each other and brace themselves. 

It must only have been a few seconds but felt like ages before Jungkook managed to dig his boots in enough to get traction and stop rolling, around the same time Alex grabbed a tree.

“Oh fuck,” he gasped, crawling towards her as soon as she stopped. “Are you ok? You’re ok, right?”

“I think I’m ok. Are you ok?!” They grabbed each other and inspected arms and legs and faces and heads. Her hair was shoved full of leaves and he pressed all over her skull, feeling for any gashes or bruises.

“You didn’t hit your head, did you? Why are you so breathless?”

“Because I just rolled down a fucking mountain in Croatia!!”

“Did you hit your head? Fuck, we should– we should go to a hospital and–”

“I didn’t hit my head, did you hit your head?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he insisted and felt like it was true. He patted his body one more time anyway. Face, head, shoulders, chest, backpack contents probably crushed now but nothing that could be too badly damaged, pants–

“Shit,” he hissed, realizing his pockets were empty. “Fuck, no!”

“What?!”

“My, um, my phone fell out…”

“Oh shit! Ok, well it has to be here…” He admired her determination as they both looked up the full length of where they’d rolled. They’d disturbed the leaves and low plants and the contents of his pockets could be literally anywhere. They’d never find it. Fuck. FUCK.

But Alex crawled forward on hands and knees and instantly cheered, “Keys! Hotel key, right here. Also put that in your backpack, not your pocket, idiot!”

“Yeah sorry, I wasn’t intending to go rolling down a hill because my girlfriend can’t watch where she’s going.”

“It was a hidden slope!”

“You have to look! We aren’t even supposed to be up here!”

“They could have put a sign or something,” she suggested, clearly predicting his rebuttal, “You would have ignored it anyway!” He couldn’t join her laughter though. His pockets were empty. This was bad.

He crawled slowly back up the hill, trying to look everywhere and not bury his things worse in the search. Finding the key gave him hope but it was also probably the last thing to fall out. His hands trembled with fear that he had just lost several very expensive things. One of which was going to ruin everything now. He couldn’t find the perfect time in Greece if he didn’t have the fucking ring!

“Found it!” Alex cried further to the side and held up his phone in trump.

“Ok great, uh– I lost some other things so just– why don’t you sit over there and catch your breath–”

“What other things? You really want to hunt for a lip balm right now? I’ll just buy you another one.”

“It was a really good lip balm,” he mumbled, not even paying attention to what he was saying. The box was going to be even harder to find, the black would blend in with the mud and dark leaves whereas his white phone case stuck out.

“Koo, forget the lip balm–”

“It’s not about the lip balm. Just sit, make sure you’re really ok before we have to hike down again.”

“Well tell me what else you’re looking for and I’ll help.”

“Just lip balm.”

“Huh?”

He realized what he had said didn’t make sense and stopped to clarify –only to realize she was not saying huh about the lip balm. She was saying huh about the small box she had just lifted from the leaves. 

“It’s just a box,” he blurted out. Then, “It’s not mine.” But he could see on her face she suspected exactly what kind of box this was and that it was in fact, obviously, his. 

He lunged for her, “Give it–”

She twisted away from him and popped the lid.

Defeated and incapable of facing her now, he reared back and turned away, fists clenched against his forehead. 

But he had to see her face; he turned back to her. Every other possible denial or explanation or even a smooth, elegant speech that could save the day, all caught in his throat.

“I just want to,” he blurted out, pre-emptively answering the question he knew she would ask. Why? Why now? Why change things? Aren’t you happy the way we are?

“Want to what?” she asked slowly.

“Um, you know.” He gestured at the ring. “That.” She held the ring up, as if mocking how they were both being so suddenly awkward about such a little thing. But it wasn’t that little, it was actually a really big ruby! He’d looked into lab grown for ethical reasons but discovered they were significantly cheaper, so he’d gone big. Not tasteless big! But it was a rock on her hand, and with the smaller ones lining the band, that fucker sparkled. He knew she wouldn’t like something too crazy complicated because she tended to only wear simple jewelry, and yes, maybe he should have let her pick it out or talked to her first, maybe she would have liked a diamond more, he’d debated it forever–

“Jungkook.”

“I just think we should get married, ok?”

“This is what you’ve been fidgeting with in your –this is what you’ve been stressing about?”

“I’m not stressing! You’re stressing! What are you talking about?”

“I don’t know, the whole trip, you keep having these moments where you just get kind of quiet and weird and then you’re crabby after for no obvious reason. I thought you were just homesick or stressed about traveling but you just felt… off….”

He swiped the box from her hand mid-monologue and quickly shut it. She didn’t wrestle it back but did stand. Their feet slid on the leaves, and he grabbed her arm and dragged her the short remaining distance back to solid land. She promptly sat down right there on the grass and, what the hell, he sat beside her. He didn’t think she seemed happy. Also she had scraped her knee.

“We don’t have to do it,” he assured her. “We can just get another dog.”

“I didn’t even suspect it was this. You never keep secrets from me. Not successfully anyway–”

“Yeah well. I wanted to um. Surprise you.”

“Oh I’m surprised.”

“Are you really though?” he demanded. “Is it really that surprising to you that I want to marry you? I’m not some twenty-three-year-old idiot anymore.” The moment felt too raw and he quickly added, “In one month I’ll be a thirty-year-old idiot, thank you.”

“You’ve been carrying that around this whole time? You’ve had it in your pocket the whole time we’ve been in Europe? Or did you buy it here– no, when would you have bought it?”

He glowered down at the box and crossed his legs, “I brought it with us… I just wanted to wait for the perfect moment.” His insides felt like they’d liquified at this point. She knew he had the ring. She hadn’t reacted some big excited happy way about it. She hadn’t rejected him yet but he felt like they were on the brink of it; that was an old shadow but he could still summon it when he felt vulnerable with her. He didn’t want to have to beg, that would be too sad even for him.

“And none of the moments were good enough for you?” she snorted, sliding her backpack off and dragging it around to her lap.

“No! I don’t know. I thought I’d ask you in some big cool place while we traveled and then every time it just felt like the moment was more about the cool thing we were seeing. The focus wouldn’t be on the right thing. But then the moments in between have all been so normal or exhausting or busy or just not some big– maybe you wouldn’t think it was worth saying yes.”

“You think I don’t want to get married?”

“I know you don’t really care about it! We’ve never really talked about it–”

“Exactly. You never asked.”

“Well I was going to ask–”

“NO!” she shouted. “No, shut up. Me first.”

“What?”

She shoved her backpack to the side and rolled onto her knee and lifted a box –her own box. Her own fucking box. 

“Jungkook will you–”’

“What! No!” he shouted and scrambled to mirror her position. 

“NO?!”

“Alex, will you marry–”

“Will you marry me Jungkook?”

“Alex.”

“I asked you first.”

“Bullshit you were holding my… are you kidding me right now?” he cackled and fell forward as it fully struck him: Alex had a fucking engagement ring in a white box. On her person. To propose to him. In falling forward he knocked her sideways and they sprawled on the grass, a tangle of laughter. “You have a ring? For me?!”

“Well you were never going to ask me!”

“Fuck that, yes I was!”

“I didn’t know that!” she cried. 

“Why wouldn’t I? I’m always the one who asks!” 

“Fuck off, that’s not true!” She tried to elbow him but he just twisted her arm away and glared down at her as she insisted, “It was my idea to move back in together. And my idea to get Bam.”

“But it was my idea we should date in the first place.”

“No, I had that idea way earlier.”

“Ok but I’m the one who did something about it.”

“Technically I did something first–”

“What, got a shitty boyfriend who wasn’t me?”

“Yeah. Although I guess you were already doing a lot of somethings–”

“Hey now! Well I said I love you first, so–” 

“Ok, well I was doing something about this first!” she defended.

He kissed her. But he started laughing and had to roll to the side so he wouldn’t crush her because the laughter was bubbling out so hard it hurt. 

“Did you really– let me see it,” he demanded, taking the box from her hand and tossing his onto her chest.

“Hey, ouch!”

He sat up and wiped at his eyes and opened the white box. The ring tucked inside was dark gray and silver, textured so that it looked like rock.

“It’s hammered meteorite,” she quickly explained. “I figured you can pick out your own wedding ring that you want to wear forever but this looked cool, kind of like the other rings you’ve worn except nicer.”

“Seriously, this is heavy! Wasn’t it expensive?”

“Jesus, not compared this fucking rock you bought. I only got a glimpse and it blinded me–”

“Well open it and look at it again,” he said. But his own gaze didn’t leave his ring yet, the one she’d picked out. To propose to him. “Why didn’t you propose yet, huh?”

“I thought I’d do it in Greece, on the beach or something. But I kept it with me in case a good moment came up. I didn’t realize it was a race but I’m really happy I won.”

“You didn’t win,” he scowled.

“I asked you first.”

“Only because you saw my ring for you!”

“But you didn’t ask me, for all I know it could be any kind of ring in there…” Her speech trailed off as he reached over to pop the box open again. “God, that ring is way prettier than anything I’ve ever worn. I love that it’s a ruby.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, it just feels so… I don’t know. Special.” 

He beamed. That was exactly what he had wanted. He wanted her to feel special. She wan’t just any other woman, she couldn’t have just any engagement ring. 

“Get ready for my mom to tell you how important red is in Chinese culture as if you don’t already know.”

“I know, I thought of that too when I was trying to decide between a sapphire and a ruby.”

“I like the ruby. It’s sexy.”

“It’s lab grown. It’s not like a blood ruby or anything.”

“Yeah, Verizon doesn’t pay you enough for blood– oh my god, is this why you got the second job?!”

“Not all of us lived with our parents and built up savings for a year.” He pulled the meteorite ring out of its box and slid it down on his left ring finger. He wore rings sometimes but never on this finger. It felt bulky and awkward to have a ring there.

She didn’t even notice, still staring at the ruby ring. “I know but… but you could have asked me with something so much cheaper than this. You could have asked me with nothing! Or a Ring Pop or something!”

“I wanted to give you a reason to say yes.”

“You’re the reason to say yes.” She let out a noisy sigh and shook her head. “So pretty but so dumb.”

He clicked his tongue, “Sure, and I’m a good reason, but you’ve said things against getting married and I thought you’d need some convincing–”

“What things? I’m not against getting married! I don’t want a big fussy wedding but… but I want to marry you, Jungkook. Didn’t I say that in ninth grade?”

There it was. There’s what he wanted to hear. His heart gave a final twist in his chest and settled back into a steady beat, warm and comfortable. His stomach stopped tying itself in knots. 

“I want to marry you too.”

“Then let’s get married!” She slid her arms around his shoulders, pulling him into the searing kiss he hadn’t been able to focus on a moment ago. But now he was kissing his fiance, the woman he was going to marry, the woman he already knew he was going to spend his life with but now everyone else would see it too. He pushed her back into the grass, wanting as much physical contact as possible for this first kiss of their engagement. A moment without photos for once in his life; a moment just for them that would live only in their memories. He wrapped his arms around her and rolled with her. 

She squealed beneath him and kicked her little feet, “Ok ok, put the rings on already!”

“I’m already wearing mine, you’re the slow-poke.”

“You already put it on? Let me see. How does it feel?”

“Weird. Heavy.”

“I guess you don’t have to wear it… I know men don’t usually wear engagement rings but–”

“It’s pretty fucking rad. I’m going to wear it.”

His compliment was sincere and she glowed. He understood that feeling. He felt the same warmth as he tugged the ruby ring from the box and slid it onto her stubby little finger. He loved those stubby little fingers. He loved the hands that held his back, and arms that wrapped around him again, and the woman who breathed romantically into his ear, 

“You put your ring on first so I double won.”

“ALEX!”

“Oh my god, do I have to take your name? Alex Jeon? I think you should take mine. Jungkook Song.”

“Just shut up and kiss me.” He pulled her close and kissed her again, running his thumb across the ruby and diamonds now perched on her hand. Kissed her in front of the ruined castle that was probably not even a castle and just some random old knocked down grain storage Kissed her and tried not to cry with relief because he did not want him crying to be part of their engagement story but it looked like he didn’t have any more say in that than he did the moment she’d found the ring.. 

He tucked her beneath his chin and held her close as she gawked again at her ring. “I can’t believe this. It’s gorgeous. I can’t believe I have a ring like this… you didn’t have to go this big…”

“I don’t care. I have no regrets.” 

“It’s so heavy. It feels so weird to have on… is this going to get us mugged?! Maybe I shouldn’t wear it… but I don’t want to take it off.”

“I think we’ll be ok but I got crazy insurance on it too so if something happens just hand over the ring, ok?”

“Aw, babe, that’s so sweet!”

“I wasn’t being sweet, I just know you’re definitely going to lose it or something. You’re going to call me crying from work because you dropped it in the bean grinder–”

“No I won’t! I’ll never let anything happen to it.”

“Ok well… I’m glad you like it…” He was flustered now and glad she couldn’t see his face. He had worried it would be too flashy for her until the last minute. “And we don’t have to do a big fussy wedding,” he added. “We can just do a courthouse thing or we can elope, whatever you want.”

“We’ll figure it out when we get home,” she agreed. Her kiss on his neck gave him a full shiver. “But um… for our honeymoon…”

He chuckled and wiggled his eyebrows even though she couldn’t see. He was going to really fill up that Assport.

“Yeah?”

“I never want to go backpacking again,” she rushed out. “Don’t get me wrong, this trip with you is awesome and I’m really glad we’re doing this but I’m–”

“I’m so fucking tired!” he shouted his agreement. “I just want to be in one place for a while!”

“Yeah! I’m so tired of looking at tourist sites… I don’t even care anymore! We’re going to see the Parthenon in Greece and be like yep, looks just like the pictures… there it is…”

He laughed and shook her side to side, “Yes yes yes. God I’m so relieved you said that. You’re so adventurous on this trip, I thought you’d found a new thing you love and I was going to have to get used to wearing the same five outfits for weeks at a time–”

“And you still wanted to propose?”

“Yeah! I’m really great, aren’t I?”

She laughed and burrowed against his chest, “Yeah, all right, you’re pretty good. But let’s never do this again. Let’s go to Greece and see the Parthenon and then lay on beaches and that’s it.”

“Yeah, like maybe for our honeymoon we just go to one place and stay there for two weeks. A beach or something.”

“Yeah.”

“Just nap in hammocks and I can watch you toddle around in hot bikinis–”

“I don’t toddle.”

“You do after a few pina coladas. Glad you didn’t push back on the bikini. It’s going to be great. I can already close my eyes and see your tit popping out.”

“It’ll be great,” she at least agreed. “Whatever we do. And this trip has been great! I’m really glad we did this. I’m glad we’ll have these memories of the time we backpacked through thirteen countries–”

“We aren’t spending the night in Belgrade though, we’re just connecting trains, right? So I don’t think that counts.”

“It’s seven hours from Zagreb to Belgrade and then sixteen hours to Thessaloniki–”

“God why did we say we were doing trains everywhere instead of flying?” 

“Because we’re stupid,” she laughed. “But we’ve got a private room on the overnight!”

“Oh.” He grinned. “Oh I see. I fuck you on the overnight train, I get the stamp for Serbia– but hey, we pass through like four countries, not just Serbia–”

“I don’t know, that’s a lot of fucking–”

“I think our engagement has refreshed me,” he taunted. “Boyfriend dick was tired but fiance dick is ready to rail–”

Instead of responding to his humor she just gasped, “Oh my god, we’re engaged. We’re meeting everyone in Greece engaged.”

“Yeah? You feel some kind of way about that?”

“Yeah I’m stunned,” she admitted. “I’m so happy, I can’t believe this.” Jungkook felt like his chest would burst open at that point. She said yes! The train rides to get to their last stop would be long, but then they’d have a whole week on Greek beaches with their friends before flying home as a group. And then it was going to be so good to be home. Home with his pup and his fiance.

“I think I have some cake in my backpack! It’s probably squished but we should eat it to celebrate. Should we call home and tell everyone we’re engaged, or just surprise them in Greece? God, I can’t wait to be on the beach as a sexy engaged lady.”

“What does that even mean?”

“You know, bikini, big rock, stud fiance.”

“So you finally admit I’m a stud.”

“I’ll admit whatever you want once you’re Jungkook Song.”

“I am not–” She kissed him and he quit arguing. For now. It didn’t matter, nothing mattered, not the exhaustion or the homesickness or the long train ride ahead. She’d said yes. She’d been wanting it too. In a couple weeks they’d turn thirty and enter a new decade of their lives together, and after that at some point take on the titles of husband and wife as well. Would it feel very different? The thought of calling Alex his wife was good. Really good. He couldn’t wait to call her his wife even if he couldn’t have explained why it mattered so much. It just did. 

“Let’s at least call Bam and tell him,” Jungkook insisted.

“Ok, baby. But you know, Namjoon or Yoongi will have to answer the call for him because he can’t work the phone with his big clumsy paws, so they’ll know. And Namjoon isn’t great at keeping secrets…”

“It doesn’t have to be a secret. That’s the point of the big ruby, right?”

“Hello?” 

They gasped and turned at the voice from behind them. A man in slacks stood by the path with a walkie-talkie. It looked like a uniform, though not police. Still Jungkook leapt to his feet. The man asked the question they were familiar with now in pretty much any language What language do you speak?

“English.”

“Oh. You cannot be here,” the man told them. 

“Ha! I was right,” Jungkook crowed at Alex.

“The path was open,” Alex insisted. “We thought it was ok.”

The man just pointed back, “It is dangerous. You go now. Bye.”

Jungkook grabbed her hand and dragged her along before she could argue further. The man didn’t seem angry or like they were in major trouble or anything, just like they ought to leave. Stupid tourists, he was probably thinking.

Jungkook clutched Alex’s hand in his, distracted by the weight of his engagement ring. He liked that it felt weird right now. It meant something felt physically different, not just emotionally, and he thought it was stupid men didn’t wear engagement rings more often. Why did girls get all the fun? He hadn’t even known he wanted a ring but Alex had surprised him.

“So you want to go to the real Samobor castle?” he asked her as they found themselves back on the road. He knew he was still smiling like an idiot, the flush of getting caught swirling with the flush of a happy engagement. 

“No….”

His eyes narrowed.

“Ok, fine, I do! It’s now or never and it’s not going to be as good as the one we just saw but let’s see it and then we’ll take the first bus back to Zagreb and–”

“Ok,” he cut off her persuasive speech. He pulled his phone out again to check the map. 

“Really?”

“Yeah. We should make the most of our time even if we’re tired. I don’t want you to regret it later. No regrets with me, got it?”

She squeezed his hand, “I don’t have any. I hope you don’t either.” With a wink she set off.

He tugged her hand the opposite direction, “I will if you go that way, it’s the wrong way.”

“No, the map!”

“It’s not a compass, that’s not north.”

“How do you know?” she demanded.

“Wait,” Jungkook decided, seeing the man who’d chased them off coming down the path. “Excuse me! Can you tell us the right way to go?”

“Ah, my hero,” Alex beamed and just ogled her ring, leaving him to figure out directions to the castle he didn’t even care about.

But actually he did care. He understood enjoying the moment to the fullest. He wanted to see everything too. He really did feel refreshed, like he could once again fully appreciate how cool it was to be walking through a town on the other side of the world from home, hand in hand with Alex.

His fiance.

“Hey let’s take a photo together at the castle and pretend I proposed there,” he suggested.

“No way. I’m going to tell everyone the whole story. Falling down the mountain. How you almost lost the ring. How I proposed first.”

“How you led us to a place we weren’t supposed to go?” he pointed out. “And almost got us killed falling down the mountain?” It was an exaggeration. He didn’t care.

Gleefully she pointed out, “How you followed me up and falling down the mountain?”

“Yeah well… I’ll follow you anywhere, I guess.”

“All right, follow me into the next cake shop on the way. You deserve another piece,” she deigned, and patted his cheek with the hand sporting his ring, the result of all his extra hard work and planning. 

“Yeah, I really do.”

“Why did you say it like that?!”

“It’s hard work being your ride or die, Alex. You take me places I’ve never been before–”

“I know! Just think, without me, you’d never even know how much you like prostate org–”

“Heeeey, come on. Why are you bringing that up? We’re talking about cake!”

“Just thinking about what we’ll do if we call it an early night tonight.”

He snickered and assured her, “That’s cute, your little idea, but let’s be real, you’ll be snoring on the bus back and I’m going to have to carry you to our hotel.”

“I seem to remember you were the one who fell asleep after you swore you’d stay awake and made us miss our stop in Austria–”

“Ok but why was I so tired, Alex? Because someone got too drunk our last night in Prague and I was up all night holding her hair back–”

“Yeah what the hell was in those drinks?”

“That you kept ordering?!”

“Well. Oh damn, soon I’ll be able to say ‘well you married me’ as a comeback,” she beamed up at him. “That’s going to feel so good.”

“Yeah. Real good self-burn there. You’re so good at comebacks.”

“Well, you’re the one who wants to marry me, so…”

He let out a noisy sigh and admitted, “You’re right. I’m pretty stupid, huh?”

“Wait! No!”

He leaned down and dropped his voice, “Hey, speaking of cream cake to celebrate–”

“Oh my god, seriously?”

“You’re the one who wants to marry me. Damn, you’re right, that does feel good as an insult.”

“From now on when I want to strangle you, I’ll just gaze at my ruby and remember why.”

“Because you love me,” he grinned.

“Hm.”

“Because you want to spend forever with me.”

“Love my ruby.”

“And me. Say it.”

She rolled her eyes. “And you.” But her smile cut through the playful sigh. She was happy. He was happy. Bam was going to be so happy when they told him too even if he didn’t understand because nothing was really changing, he would just be excited because they were. 

He kissed the top of her head and then pulled the bakery door open for her so they could get a celebratory treat on their way to another fucking castle. Every day was an adventure with this one and he looked forward to a lifetime of them. As long as there was Alex and cake, he’d be good to go. 

And that's a wrap! Thank you so much for every comment, like, reblog, and moment of your time you spent reading my little story. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing these two! <3

Story Masterlist || My Writing Masterlist

[doudouneverte]

Special Bond | Chapter three: Chaos and Party (part. 1)

*not my GIF

Chapter Summary: You're in the party with your Agatha and you'll meet some interesting poeple...

Paring: Yelena Belova x Maximoff!Reader; Agatha Harkness x Maximoff!Reader; Wanda Maximoff x Sister!Reader x Pietro Maximoff; Avenger x Female reader (platonic)

| chapter two | serie masterlist | chapter four |

Zagreb, Croatia 6 pm in your hotel room

"So we'll not talk about earlier?" Agatha broke the silence

"About what ?" you feigned the confusion

"Your gay panic" she tried to restein the laught but it's impossible, she remind the moment where you pose your eyes on the blond and she can't contain more "you shoulded see your face you were totally blushing, you didn't find your words and you even couldn't argue with for your costume"

"That was not a gay panic" you groan but you it was "my mind just didnt want to cooperate" you tried

"Yeah yeah sur and i'm blond" you rolled your eyes you know she choose that color on purpose

"So about tonight what did you choose for you and don't tell me you will go with your dress 'cause i know you chosse something, i can sense your annoyance but i'll not comment it today" you remark

It's true, since you began to learn more about magic with Agatha she foud your mind was more open than any other human, that scare her a little becasue that mean you're more vulnerable at mind attack than anyone else. At the start you bith thought it was cause of you telepath power but it's more than that, so the older witch cast a spell on you, the spell increase your telepath power you can usually use them only within a radius of 15 meter (~46ft) but with up agatha gave you the distance up to 50 meter (~164ft) anf of course you contact her anywhere in the planete. You also train you telekinsis power, you can levitate 1 can tiny car now but you want to progress to be able to protect yourself and your sibling when you'll find them.

During this year you travel with Agatha to find a way to fortifie your mind and that why you are here in Croatia but her friend din't have a solution neither so you propose to visit the city to not waste youe time in europe.

Seeing you were blaking out the older witch grabe and look at you "we'll find a way i promise you and after that we wiln can focus on a way to find your sibling" you look at her and see her sadness and you're sad too, if you find pietro and wanda that mean you'll can't spend all your days with agatha and despite the fact you miss your family the brunette is like a second mother to you

"Yeah I know" you sight before smile again "but now let's focus on the party"

-------

2 hours later in Agatha's friend (little) tower

"So what are we going here" ask Steve to Tony but the billionaire don't seem to listen

"According to the details Mr.Fury sent us the agents who have been kill was protecting some one and we are here to find this man and try to figurate why they want to kill him" respond Vision, steve look at him then look at Tony again

"Again we're disguise because ... ?" he add

"Cause it's a Halloween party, it would be weird if we're the only who don't respect the dress code and it more easy to melt in the crowd" said finaly tony with a smirk when he look the captain.

He choose the costume for everyone obviously; rohdey was Superman, Wanda was princess Peach , Vision was Mario and Steve Luigi and Tony was Batman but with an armored suit.

Wanda was trying to explain at Vision why they wear a pink dress who is definitly not the type of our emo Wanda but she was cut by an little who bump into her back. She turn around and see a helmet with a teint glasse she was confuse and she hear a little 'sorry i can't reaaly see wher i go' she chucle and let the go.

You were trying to find Agatha you understand she scared that you'll be bother with your power tonight so choose a costume with a helmet wher sche can hide some run to prevent you for any attack tonight. You were near your mama/mentor when you see Batman, not the real one but some one suit like batman so decide to speak with them, their costume is too 'cool' you ant the same.

"Euh excuse me ?" Tony heard while he was try to find the host of the party, he trun around and look at you, more in your glasse but he decide to not comment and he smile gently to you.

"Can i help you ?" he respond

"Yes, i want to know where did you find your costume he's so cool, i want the same i try to convice mama to buy a batman costume but the doesn't want" did that seem you were excitaded because you were really, Batman is like your favorite fictional hero.

No need to see your eyes to imagine the sparkle when you talk so Tony replied "i made it, i have some experience withtechnologie and suit so"

"Woah, it's more cool now. Can i take... a picture please ?" you ask hesitantly but you really hope he accept

"Yes why not" you don't lost any second to pull up your phone and open the photo you took some picutre and after the man continue "so you are ?"

"Oh sorry i didn't introduce myself, i'm Y/N Harckness sir" you respond

"Call me Tony" he smile at you "so Y/N do you know the host of this tower?"

"Mister Loucas? Yes he's my mama's friend"

Do you know where i can find him ?

You look around you before poiting a cirner of the room "here and the woman next to him is" you notice the glare of Agatha and reminder why you search her before you find "she is my mama and she will kill me cause she has some important thing to say me" you laught

"Oh thanks and see you later" he said before leaving you

"You're welcome Tony and have a nice party" you add before rush to the witch you didn't heart him said 'you too kiddo'

You're now on the couch near your mama you tell her how you met batman and she see the excitement in your voice. You pull your phone to show her the picture and when you saw them you remark someone behind on one photo, it was the blond you met early. You were looking for her with your in the entire room, you saw her near the bar and excuse yourself to Agatha, you have one mission in your mind.

-------

10 minutes earlier in front of the tower

A group of girl are in front the main door and argue about something "You sure you want to do that alone Yelena ?" one of them said

"Don't worry it's just an in and out, and i would need some backup so you have to stay here, i'll come back in 30 minutes" before the others girls can argue she's enter.

Present

"Hey!" the blond turn her head and she face to an... astronaute ?

"Heu...hi, sorry but i don't have time now i have sometihing really important to do" she reply

You took off your helmet and look at her like she was the woman of your life and said "Oh it's seem you don't have any time for an astronaute but have you some time for a modest girl ?"

She stare you and look around and finally said "Okay maybe 5 minutes but i really have something to do after that"

"Oh don't worry 5 minutes is more than enought" you feint a laught to destresse you but she look at you with concern so you continue "i'm an astronaute and you are miss rapunzel in black ?"

She hesitate an instant and reply "a Black Widow ?!" she see your smile and the sparkle in your eyes (you really love superhero)

"Like the Avenger?" she nod with confusion and you add "oh and i'm Y/N by the way" she look around, she seem like search something or some one and sudden she find it "and you are..."

"I'm in a rush sorry" without more she leave, you stay here you analyze the situation, it was weird but not like when agatha fail a recipe it was and before youcan thinks to find your mysterious pretty girl you feel a hand you turn you head and meet the blue eyes of your favorite witch.

"Your... helmet ?" she said, you put your helmet on your head and apologize and she continue "you know i don't like to do that me too but it's the only way to prevent your headache and we don't if any witch or sorcerer try to invade your mind" you sight but smile

"Yeah i know ma, i'll be more careful in the future i promise. It's just i was talking to the womanf of the afternoon and she don't recognize me with the helmet so,"

She cut you "oh I see don't worry it's nothing" she look behind her you sens she was a little scared and she add "i sens a witch in here i don't know if she a oppenent or not so keep your helmet until we leave okay sweetie?" just like when you call her 'mama', when she call you 'sweetie' you can't really say "no" and you know it's for your own safety so you'll not argue.

Few second later your mama leave you had to talk withe friend so you wait her and you heart a gunshot peaople start to scream and just after there was an explosion in the tower. You hided yourself under the bar and call Agatha by telepathy but your hear an another voice in your head some one can hear you but your brain don't really reconize the voice. Before you could do anything you see some men with gun enter in the room and fear begun to increase in you.