#by thi s i mean that i was costuming way too many people

[saltedsolenoid]

also earlier today i described myself in relation to my school's musical as "a single mother of 73... and my polycule, of course."

the polycule in question were my fellow costumers

[storiesforallfandoms]

we’re too stupid ~ the vlog squad

word count: 1885

request?: yes!

@iawaythrown​  “May I ask for a vlog squad x popular youtube reader

The reader has their own very popular youtube channel/podcast like a scientific/space podcast. (Like a Vsauce\GameTheory channel) The vlog squad and the reader fan base (somehow) always wants them to collab. One day David says "It won't happen because the reader probably doesn't like us." This ends up getting everyone on the podcast.”

description: when their favorite youtubers show interest in being on their podcast, they jump at the chance to invite them on

pairing: vlog squad x gender neutral!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two)

“You know what I’ve been listening to a lot lately?” Scotty asked David on the newest vlog David had uploaded. You were watching the vlog on your TV while you prepared to upload the newest episode of your podcast. You had a drink half raised to your lips when Scott responded to his own question, “The Spaced Out podcast.”

Your drink nearly slipped from your hand at the mention of your podcast. You were sure you had imagined it, so you went back and repeated the part just to be sure. The name of your podcast slipped from Scott’s lips again and you had to pause the video to scream with excitement.

When you placed the video again, David spoke next. “Oh wait, is that the one about space and shit? You played it for me before.”

“Yeah! Man, it’s so interesting. I could honestly listen to the host talk about space all day,” Scott said.

“He keeps bringing it up during the Scottcast, too,” Jeff commented. “I’m starting to think he’d rather co-host that podcast instead of our own.”

“Man, I’d love to be on that podcast!”

You could hardly contain your excitement. Your favorite YouTubers knew who you were?! They knew your podcast?! You had to be dreaming, you were sure of it.

“There’s no way they’d ever have us on the podcast,” David was saying. “We’re too stupid and immature, they’d probably hate us.”

“Speak for yourself!” Zane, dressed in some weird costume for a bit, called, causing the boys to laugh together.

This gave you an idea. You put your laptop aside and opened Instagram on your phone. You searched the name “David Dobrik” and went to his DMs.

~~~~~~

A week later, your podcasting room was filled with 11 extra people than there normally was. The room was only small with a handful of seats, so a lot of your guests were squeezed in together or basically sat on one another. No one seemed to mind, though. Every single person in the room was super excited to be there.

“What’s up all my space geeks? Welcome back to another episode of The Spaced Out podcast, the podcast where we discuss super nerdy space things,” you started with your usual intro. “Today’s episode is a little different, though, as today I am joined by not one, not two, not even three, but eleven special guests. You heard me right, eleven. Special guests, wanna say hi?”

All eleven of your guests rang out with a chorus of, “Hello!”s at the one time, making it all come out as just a shouting mess. You laughed and waved a hand to silence them.

“In case you had trouble understanding what they were saying,” you said, “my guests today are David, Scotty, Toddy, Zane, Erin, Carly, Natalie, Heath, Mariah, Corinna, and Jeff, better known as a large chunk of YouTube’s biggest vlogging group: The Vlog Squad!”

The Vlog Squad cheered at their introduction as you just clapped your hands.

“Can I just say,” Heath said once the noise started to die down, “that I am impressed with how fast you said our names and how easy it was. You didn’t even stutter once.”

“I’ll be honest, when David told me exactly who was coming I prepared myself for this,” you admitted. “I’ve never had so many guests on the show before. Actually, I don’t know if I’ve ever had any guests at all. I don’t really know anyone in my real life that’s as interested in space and science as I am.”

“To be fair, none of us are, either,” Jeff joked, causing the room to laugh.

“Yeah, you picked the wrong people to be on your podcast,” Corinna added.

“You don’t have to have any sort of interest to be on the podcast, really. As long as you don’t mind me talking about my nerdy space obsession every now and then anyone is welcome on the podcast.”

Your heart was beating so fast you were sure everyone else could hear it. You were shocked that you were managing to remain so calm in that moment. Your favorite YouTubers were sitting right there in front of you, being guests on your podcast, and somehow you were acting as though they were just friends that you had convinced to come on the podcast.

“Is there any cool space facts you can share with us to get the ball rolling?” David asked.

“Dude, I’ve made over 300 episodes of this podcast that is literally all about space, you gotta narrow down your parameters there,” you told him.

“What’s your favorite space fact then?”

You thought for a moment, going through all the little facts you had in your mind. There was so much you could share with them that you really didn’t know where to start.

“Okay,” you said finally, “I have one. I think David will like this cause we all know he’s made of money: there is a planet that is called 55 Cancri e. It is over twice the size of Earth and it is potentially made of diamonds.”

They all gasped and made comments of astonishment at the same time at this.

“Like, literally made of diamonds?” Corinna asked.

“It’s hard to know for sure. It’s roughly 41 lightyears away so it’s not exactly easy to reach, but they think it’s made of graphite and diamonds,” you explained. “My favorite fact, and one that’s a little scary, is that it’s actually completely silent in space. Like not a single sound, because atmospheres around planets are what contain the soundwaves to make noise.”

“I told you,” David said, turning to face Scott. “We’re too stupid to be on this podcast.”

You all laughed together. “You guys aren’t stupid! I was just fascinated with space as a child and my parents let me feed into that fascination. They always bought me books about space and brought me to visit certain space centers. I was that kid that always said she was gonna grow up and be an astronaut. Instead, I just talk about them on the internet.”

Everything was going so well. You were getting to know your guests and they kept urging you to tell them facts and stories about space. You knew a lot of what you were telling them you had talked about on the podcast before, so devoted listeners probably wouldn’t be too interested in a lot of what you had to say in that episode, but you didn’t mind too much. You just loved to see the looks of astonishment on everyone’s faces as you continued to tell them fact after fact.

When you came to a segment you did in the podcast in which you would read messages from fans, you decided to your guests choose which messages to read and respond to. David took the tablet you used for this first and read through the thousands of messages you received between uploading your most recent episode and recording the current one.

“Are you going to talk about the new 4K pictures of Mars?” he read.

“Oh my God, yes!” you responded. “That will be next episode. I haven’t looked at them all yet because I wanna have a live reaction to them, but I did see one picture and it looks absolutely stunning.”

“It blew my mind how it just looked like a desert here,” Carly commented. “Mars is a lot more like Earth than we think. Sucks that we’ll never be able to live there or anything.”

“I don’t think we’ll never be able to live there, but I don’t think it’ll happen in our lifetimes,” you commented. “But that’s a whole other thing, let’s move on from that.”

“What has been your favorite space related story of the past year?” Natalie read the message she had picked.

“I don’t know if it’s my favorite, but it’s definitely one that I was very interested in reading: a star just vanished in 2020,” you responded. “Apparently that’s something that can just happen, stars can just suddenly disappear and no one knows where they went. This star from the Kinman dwarf galaxy that shined almost brighter than the sun just vanished between 2011 and 2020, and they have no explanation for it. That story stuck with me the most cause I just find it funny that a star that bright just vanished and no one can figure out where it went.”

They continued reading you messages for a while before passing your tablet back to you.

“While I wish I could sit here with you guys and talk about space and your vlogs forever, unfortunately we are running out of time,” you said. “I want to thank the Vlog Squad again for joining me on this episode, and I hope I didn’t bore you guys to death with my stories and facts.”

“Not at all!” David spoke. “I can’t speak for everyone, but I really enjoyed myself. Listening to you talk was really interesting.”

The rest of the group agreed. You tried not to blush from all their kind words.

“I always wanna thank our sponsors again. As always I appreciate them supporting my show, and of course I want you guys, the listeners. Your constant support for the show means so much to me. If you wanna hear more fun facts about space that you’ll never use in live, follow me on my social media. If you’re not already following the podcast, follow the podcast! I upload episodes every Friday, and if you want to be involved in the show be sure to send me your space related messages and maybe I’ll read them out on the next episode. Have a good weekend, little space geek out!”

You ended the recording and the group almost cheered for you. You smiled and stood to thank them again for coming on the show. You were shocked when Corinna pulled you into a hug, which caused the rest of the group to hug you one by one.

“This was the most fun I think I’ve ever had,” Erin commented. “Would you be open to having more guests on the show? I’d love to come back and to just listen to you talk for a full hour.”

The rest of the squad agreed. You really didn’t think you could feel any more excited or on cloud nine, but they kept surprising you.

“I would definitely be open to having guests again,” you replied. “If you guys ever wanna be on the show again, just send me a DM. I’d love to have you!”

“We’d love to have you on the vlogs sometime, too, if you’d be open for that,” David told you.

There they go again, making you feel like you had passed cloud nine and now were on a completely different planet with excitement.

“Y-Yeah!” you managed. “Of course, I’d love that!”

After some more small talk, you showed the group out and thanked them again for coming. Once you were sure they were gone and unable to see you, you began jumping for joy and exclaiming with excitement. You couldn’t believe it! You had just hosted a podcast with your favorite people, and they asked you to join them for filming sometime?!

“This is the best day of my life!”

[grayhyacinth]

The Final Show

Ship: Kaminari X Jirou from BNHA

Description: The final year at UA also concludes Jirou's band. With her music, can she reach Kaminari's heart with her final performance?

Author's words: I absolutely ADORE this ship! I regret making it long... I also uploaded it to my ao3 account, click here! I made a banner :P

Warnings: Cussing

-----------------------------------------------

Jirou was beyond ecstatic for her final year at UA! Especially since her goal at becoming a Pro Hero was just around the corner. Unfortunately, there were some obstacles that obscured her path.

For instance, every 3rd year student at UA had to decide their future. Such as going to college, joining an agency, finding mentors, and finding a trustworthy insurance company-- to fix any damage that might happen while working.

For Jirou, this was a walk in the park! She had planned-- months prior, that she was going to mentor under Present Mic before joining an agency.

Although she laid down her future path, Jirou was like any students in her year. Apprehensive. But not for the reason that you may think.

The purple-hair girl had started a band in the middle of her first year, that had grown sensationally! Reaching many thrilling hits and succeeding in several genres, Jirou was extremely proud to have been the leader.

But all of that was coming to an end.

Bakugou was going on to bigger and higher platforms that would no doubt, make him the number one hero; Yaoyoruzu was going to be a huge publicity hero and make herself known in the public eye; Tokoyami was going to train up in the mountains for years, before coming back into the city; and Kaminari? Well, the big doofus was going to join Kirishima and mentor under Fat Gum, who unfortunately had to put up with both of their stupidity.

These were all wonderful and exciting futures for her friends, but why did she feel sad?

Jirou was scribbling down lyric ideas into her notebook when suddenly, a body collided into her desk.

"Hey!"

"Ah! Sorry, Jirou!!" Kaminari grinned widely at her, before throwing another fake punch at Kirishima.

"Pshhhh... It isn't manly of you to disturb a lady while she's busy, Denki."

"Hah!" Kaminari landed a punch before Kirishima activated his hardening quirk. "It's not my fault! You're the one who push me into the desk!"

Jirou rolled her eyes at their bizarre antics and picked up her notebook, shuffling over to Yaoyoruzu's desk.

"They really do share one brain cell, huh, Momo?"

"Hm?" Yaoyoruzu barely lifted her head to greet Jirou, too engrossed in her own notebook to pay attention.

Jirou frowned. "Heeeeeeey, earth to Momo?"

As if on cue, the black-hair girl snapped out of her concentration and fully faced her friend with an apologetic smile.

"S-Sorry about that!! I really need to get more sleep these days..." Yaoyoruzu trailed off. She then shook her head once more and lifted up her notebook, showing a design of a hero suit.

"I was thinking about changing my costume," she said sheepishly. "Do you think this is too... girly?"

"Girly? It looks like a suit for an R-rated hero!Besides, aren't you going for PG13 at most?"

Yaoyoruzu nodded her head slowly in agreement, before clasping her hands together and thanking the purple-hair girl for her opinion.

"So! What did you need?"

Jirou opened her mouth to reply, but then the bell for class rang, and she quickly dived to her seat.

"Later." She mouthed.

- Time skip -

"Later" was a complete understatement. Usually for the soon-to-be hero, it meant "until lunch." But this time, this time, it meant "give me an entire week because people SERIOUSLY cannot get their shit done!"

For the entire week, Jirou was tasked with fixing her entire band! Even the words, "fixing up" was an understatement! She had to buy new supplies, get new wires, re-order speakers, re-edit the soundtracks, and find out why her online merchandise store was glitching.

But, by the end of the week, it was all finally fixed!

Jirou collapsed onto the dorm room's couch in pure exhaustion. Her body was sinking into the couch, sending her into bliss. Even her eyelids were on the brink of shutting! Dream land was just an arm length away. But unfortunately, her mind was bursting with ideas, each running frantically into different directions.

With a sigh, Jirou sat up and searched through her backpack.

"Ah hah! There you are!" With a delighted smile, the purple-head slammed down the notebook onto the coffee table and turned to an unfinished song.

"Hm? What did you find, Jirou?"

In an instance, the girl shrieked and threw the notebook across the room. She then turned around and strained a grin at the person behind her.

It was Kaminari.

"Oh... Hey Kaminari! What's up?" Jiroy twirled the dangling part of her ear and fluttered her eyelashes. Hopefully the dunce part of his brain will kick in...

With a raised eyebrow, Kaminari walked over to the thrown notebook and picked it up. "So... am I not supposed to ask why you just freaked out? Or should I stay silent?"

As he was about the hand back the notebook, Kaminari conveniently looked down and noticed the unfinished song. "Hm? What's thi- hey!"

Jirou had hastily grabbed her notebook from the yellow-head and turned away, a blush forming on her cheeks. Please tell me he didn't read it...

"It's nothing! Just a list of agencies I was looking into..."

"You know," Kaminari said slowly. He then placed a hand on the Jirou's shoulder. "Fat-Gum was looking to find another student... preferably a female." He chuckled.

Jirou blinked. "Wha-"

"Anyways, it would be nice to be partners with you again... but this time in crime!"

Partners in crime. The words stayed glued to her conscious as Jirou quickly walked away. It was a good title.

"Yeah... sure... I uh... have things to do! Don't be late to practice and I'll see you tomorrow! Good night!"

"Okay! Good night, Jirou! Think about it, would yeah?"

Jirou walked away without a reply and the open she reached her room, she had slammed shut the door behind her and grabbed the nearest guitar.

Playing a couple cords, her heart returned back to it's original beat and Jirou leaned her head back, deep in thought. The song was close to finish-- all it needed was a title and an ending verse.

But, it wasn't the fact that one of her band members saw an original-- because that was a petty thing to get angry over. It was because the person who she wanted to dedicate everything to, saw it. The one person who made her panick with a red face and a heart that beat 1 million beats a minute, read it. That was almost as bad as fighting All Might face to face!

Hopefully things will get better. Jirou thought.

Hopefully.

- Time Skip -

That fucking, son of a bitch, mother fucking of a Pikachu, deserves death. No, no, no. The dunce didn't deserve death, he deserved a thousand years of hunger and agonizing pain!

Jirou stomped into her room and slammed the door shut. She grabbed the nearest guitar and strung a note with so much furry, the sound vibrated for minutes. After a while, the note died down and so did the purple-head's anger.

She was infuriated at none other, than Kaminari. Who, conveniently was being a huge piece of shit these last few weeks.

For example, three weeks ago Jirou declared for the band to practice one last time before heading back to the dorm room. Usually, this meant to go all out and don't. Hold. Back.

Who would have thought that Kamin fucking Nari decided to actually go all out??

"Okay, guys! One last practice and then we can all head back home!" Jirou had declared proudly. For her, these practices meant a time to rejuvenate and connect to music, passionately. "One, two three-"

All of a sudden, the speakers had blasted music that made everyone fall to the floor, clutching their ears in pain.

It was the sound of a guitar.

"WHAT THE FUCK, KAMINARI?!"

"YOU WANNA FUCK???" Kaminari gave a playful-wide grin at Jirou and continued with his charade.

She became bright-burning red with embarrassment. As she scrambled up the turn off the speaker, Jirou had listed 100 different ways the kill Kaminari. Scratch that, 1 million!

The purple-head had successfully turned off the speaker and turned towards the blonde, "OUT!"

Thinking back to this time, Jirou regretted the way she acted. After all, it wasn't Kaminari or Jirou's fault for their actions.

They-- including all of the 3rd years, were all incredibly stressed out with studying for their finals and college entrance exams. That including rigorous training and last minute plans for the future.

Jirou pulled out a song labeled, "Hopefully Partners." She had finished it a couple weeks back, but never had the time to play it. It was, after all, a song she dedicated for Kaminari.

He had been the one to encourage Jirou to make the band, created the name, and made her life rotate around his words. He was the only one who had done anything for her, out of pure kindness.

Picking up her guitar, she strung a chord.

"Electric waves are dancing. Oh yeah. Dancing around you, babe." She took a deep breath, "The thumping beat of thunder, is creating a symphony that makes me think, will this all fade?"

Jirou stopped after. This is super cheesy... With a shake of her head and a smile, she picked up her phone and diled Yaoyoruzu's number. If she was going to sing this song, then she better get practicing.

- Time Skip -

"Jirou... what are you wearing?!"

The girl in question turned around, confused. "What do you mean?"

Yaoyoruzu sighed and exclaimed, "This is a monstrosity! How are you supposed to go onstage with this... this horror?!" She waved arms up and down, pointing out all the flaws of the dress.

This was their very last performance. After tonight, the band was just another prominent figure in history. They had all played several songs before this, but performance was special.

Jirou had called the manager to schedule a secret show, dedicated to Kaminari-- who was going to be in the crowd, oblivious and certainly living up to his nickname.

"Momo, it doesn't look that bad,"

Rolling her eyes, Yaoyoruzu grabbed the purple-head by the ear and shoved her to the nearest changing room. "This is why I bring extra clothes! You're going to look absolutely fabulous tonight!"

Groaning, Jirou shook her head and slipped into the outfit. She was then pulled into a chair while Yaoyoruzu did her makeup. All when having to hear the black-hair girl exclaim how much of a disappointment Jirou was.

"And done! What do you think?"

She stood up and walked over to the nearest full-body mirror. The dress came down, mid-way to her thigh, and it was similar what she wore to I-Expo. Except, it had black-dark clouds on her chest, then a sunset color bow on her stomach, and then purple and yellow lighting strikes going all the way down.

She was in awe.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we actually have one last performance from your beloved band! As an apology for this long and late night, drinks and appetizers will be free!"

Jirou snapped out and quickly gave Yaoyoruzu a hug, whispering a thank you into her ear.

"Please don't thank me," Yaoyoruzu giggled, "Thank your terrible fashion skills. Now come on, we have a show to preform!"

Jirou shook her head in laughter and together, they went on stage.

The bright lights hit her in the eyes, blinding her from the crowd. She walked over to the microphone, guitar in hand.

"Uh..." she turned around and faced her friends with a smile. "I would first like to thank my amazing band members for pushing through these last three years, my classmates for attending every show, and all of you for encouraging us every night."

She blinked.

"But I would like to thank everything to Kaminari Denki. This song is for you!"

With that, she strung her guitar and the lyrics poured out of her like water. Every note-- every word fit in like pieces of a puzzle. The music flew through the crowd, entrancing them in a slumber that made them lean in for more.

The song was three minutes long, but for Jirou, it was as long as ten seconds. As the last note played, she bowed. There was so much more that she wanted to say. There was so much more songs that she wanted to make and preform.

A bitterness filled her heart as she walked off stage, but then a thought occured to her. Jirou ran back, bumping into the backstage members and hastily grabbed the microphone.

"I LOVE YOU, YOU STUPID PIKACHU!"

Jirou was pulled off stage by embarrassed backstage members and she was carried over to Yaoyoruzu, who gave them a sympathetic smile.

"That was... really amazing of you, Jirou."

Jirou froze in her tracks. Her blood rushed to her head, her muscles screamed at her to run, but her feet stayed rooted to her spot.

"S-shut up... Kaminari."

Yaoyoruzu, who felt extremely awkward gave Jirou a pat and gave hand signals to everyone to leave them.

"Ugh. Just get a room, jeez." A girl-- around Jirou's age muttered while passing by them. The words only made her burn like lava.

"Wh-what do you want?"

Kaminari hummed, amused by the girl's mortification. "I was thinking.. how about going to the park?"

"What?" Jirou whispered.

"I kind of... planned something tonight, as well." Kaminsri stated, also embarrassed. He then held out his hand. "Wanna go?"

Jirou reached out, but then retreated a bit in hesitation. Was she really willing to go out with the biggest idiot in Japan?

"F-fine."

Unfortunately, Jirou was looking at the ground as Kamianri led them to the park, because she didn't notice the adorable grin that spread across his cheeks.

The lamps lit the path and as they neared their destinations Jirou couldn't help but let out a suprise gasp. Kaminari-- with help by all their friends, had decked out the park like a full on love paradise.

There were fairy lights and lanterns that hung from tree to tree, heart shaped balloons that twirled in the wind, and even sprinkled rose petals on the gravel path.

If this was extravagant, then Jirou didn't know what else to call the next biggest suprise of the night. Because at the center, there stood an ice gazebo with the most romantic dinner laid out.

"You're going to attract flies, Jirou." Kaminari chuckled.

Jirou immediately shut her mouth and playfully smacked him. "S-shut up."

As they both sat down to eat, the atmosphere changed. Their normal, playful chatter that consisted of pure stupidity filled the night's air, and if you recorded their conversation, it would sound like a quarrel between a squirrel and a chipmunk.

"So," Electric boy placed his utensils down and scratched the back of his head. "I've been meaning to tell you something for a long time..."

Jirou looked up and as if a boulder was in her throat, she swallowed. "Yeah?"

"Jirou... no, scratch that. Kyouka-- wait, can I call you Kyouka??"

"Sure...?" This wasn't the first time Pikachu boy had said her name. But, the tingling senses in her heart definitely hadn't happen the last time.

Kaminari coughed. "Will you be my girlfriend?"

His gaze penetrated hers. There was no laughter, no sense of playfulness that usually surrounded Kaminari. Hi eyes that was usually bright and cheerful, was filled with a serious glint that was as hard as steel. The pounding in the poor girl's heart had increased three times it's usual beat, but she couldn't care less.

"HAH! Stop joking around Pikachu! You seriously need-"

"I'm serious."

The cherry blossoms that surrounded them, swayed to the wind, creating a beautiful scene that surrounded Jirou's vision. As if it were possible, the dunce head in front of her looked truly handsome.

She smiled. "Fine. But then I get to call you Pikabae."

Kaminari burst out of his seat and with a quick swoop, picked up the magnificent girl in front of him. "You can call me whatever you want. As long as your mine!"

They both laughed, eyes twinkling beneath the starry night. Kaminari slowly set her down, but his arms never left her waist. They were centimeters apart, and if Jirou wanted to, she could close the gap.

And she did.

[acehotel]

A Conversation with TURN Gallery Artist Mason Saltarrelli

TURN Gallery’s Mason Saltarrelli is an abstract artist, illustrator and painter born and bred in the city of New Orleans. His work is imbued by the improvisation of jazz, abstract animal silhouettes and color, the last being what Mason calls a “co-author” in his work. Mason will be Ace Hotel New York’s gallery artist for November and has a series of curtain paintings hanging in the lobby of Ace Hotel New Orleans. Here he chats with artist and friend, Joseph Hart of Deep Color, about to-do lists, Black Jaw the alligator and how abstraction can be a “beginning of seeing.”

Joseph Hart: Bridging in and out of painting and jazz music is the notion of improvisation. Can you talk a little bit about how improvising and intuition act as creative tools in here while you're working? When I say “in here,” we're sitting in your studio.

Mason Saltarrelli: I seldom arrive with a plan. More, I have a cast of characters. I'll call on one of the characters to come into the scene, but I don't know what their lines are and I’m not sure what costume they are wearing. Often the plan or story is only fully clear to me after the work is done. A work’s construction is realized through calling on a player and seeing where it wants to go in order to explore. Chance of shape and colors’ influence assist in determining the voyage.

JH: I see a figure here that almost looks like a doll. The image of an alligator pops up quite a bit. Is there anything else in your memory bank that you pull from?

MS: Yes. There’s a dog and a hairdo.

JH: What's the hairdo?

MS: It's a way of making a portrait without being literal. That's where there is a crossover with jazz and my work. In traditional jazz, there is a melody for each song and then the band members improvise solos. My characters offer me the function of melody and adjusting their forms and colors is my solo allowing me to create.

When a musician plays “Sweet Lorraine” or “Tiger Rag,” they know which melody to play. But when it’s time for the solo, they are free to forge a new idea based off of a set construct. The improvisation is where the real fun comes in.

JH: Yeah, that's where the surprise happens during those solos perhaps. When do surprises happen in your studio? When you collide these characters together, or put down a color or a gesture in relation to them and something happens that you didn't expect —what type of surprises happen?

MS: Color definitely plays a big role in surprises. The paper and canvas piece that will be in the show at the Ace New York has gone through many adjustments. By changing the green from blue next to the gray, it starts to push and pull and layers begin to appear. Structures move to the surface and in turn other colors recede based on placement. This creates layers within the piece. Color is a co-author in my work. The importance of the parts that make up the whole of the figures is greatly determined by coloring.

JH: You get a little depth in there. One thing that I've always observed about your work is an extraordinary flatness in how you're applying the paint and you're getting a nice graphic shape often that's opaque. Some of your paint is washed out, but at the same time with some of the tinted canvases and overlapping you really achieve a sense of depth.

MS: Depth is important to me. Each layer, whether it's a work on wood, paper or canvas, is like writing a sentence and those sentences stack on top of one another. Eventually as the sentences build up they create a paragraph. The paintings are paragraphs that are building up to relay a story.

JH: Another consistency in your work as I've known it over the years is a love for drawing. There's a lot of drawing in your painting. I know you have a history with works on paper and making drawings on hand tinted paper. Can you talk about how drawing is important in your studio practice and in your art making?

MS: I often paint through drawing. It’s a method of placing ideas. The ideas then pose questions. Without trying to fully render a figure and utilizing the idea of what something is I define what it becomes.

JH: The stakes are often lower with drawing too. I mean it's historically a preliminary action. I know you don't do sketches for these, but when we think of drawing, we think of small sketches. We think of a preparatory drawing for something larger. When your drawing is part of how you move your arm through the canvas and with a brush with paint on it, I think we carry that low pressure, emotional, psychological space with us. For me, I'll argue that it makes painting more fun, more interesting, more engaging.

MS: Yeah, I do try and keep things fun and then I start working and then I start taking it very seriously. Problem solving becomes important. Using drawing to open things up to see where they can go poses many questions with an infinite number of answers. If I start creating a form that is part of the alligator, for instance, the back of the head, and then all of I sudden decide, okay, it's time to switch into a hairdo or a doll or a dog, I have initiated a story that should be resolved if I want to share it.

Things just open up through drawing, there's no forced intention.

JH: As an exercise, I like to ask myself, if my paintings were to make a to do list, what would be on it. So I want to pose the question to you. If these paintings were to make a to-do list for the viewer, for yourself, what are a few things that would be on that list?

MS: The three paintings that hang in the Ace Hotel in New Orleans for Doc Cheatham, Lionel Ferbos and Percy Humphrey are on hemp. They're curtain paintings in that they're not stretched, but hang freely. The to-do list for the New Orleans paintings was to reflect both personal and musical aspects of each of the three traditional jazz trumpet players through abstraction.

My show at Ace New York this November will include two pieces. In the New York hemp painting, my goal was to successfully combine separate aspects of how I depicted Doc, Lionel and Percy. My intention was simple, revisit three paintings two years later in one new piece.

In the other work, my goal was to fuse my paper and canvas practices and see if I could get them to function uniformly. This piece includes canvas that has gone through a similar patina process as my paper. For this work the to-do list was basically to get the canvas and paper to have a cohesive conversation, to get them to enhance each other simultaneously.

JH: Yeah, it's working. It's a nice little installation. It reminds me of a gift. Maybe this was the wrap for the painting on top of it unfolded. There are all sorts of surprises in there.

MS: I think that paper could actually fold over and hide it.

JH: Yeah, the aspect ratio. It looks like you could wrap it right up. Let's talk about audience. When we're in our studios, there's an audience of one unless you have a friend or visitor over. But when the work leaves the studio, then there's an audience. I'm curious if you feel differently about your work when it's in front of an audience? Is your relationship to it here in your studio different than when these paintings are going to be in the Ace Hotel?

MS: I definitely consider audience. At the same time I don't have control over how they're going to perceive my work. Especially when viewing abstraction, people put their own life experiences into what they see.

JH: Yeah, that's their job.

MS: It is. Deborah Buck, an artist, came over the other day and pointed out that in the smaller canvas piece she sees a person hugging another person. I keep seeing it now because I never noticed that and I've never visualized that idea in my work before. She said it looks like a male figure protecting a child.

To me it's a doll inside of a woman's hairdo. That's one of the amazing things about abstraction, it's not over when the last mark is made. When somebody else starts looking at it it's just beginning for them, and sometimes can actually be a beginning of seeing for me.

JH: Yeah, it's great. I think the audience, when it's in a public space, like you said, brings their own experience and finds their own meaning. It's nice to hear when a viewer shares that meaning with the artist. When you describe Deborah coming in and seeing something that you didn't see, that's a new layer for you and compounds whatever you had going for it on your own. I think that's a great thing. It's a dialogue. That's the dialogue you're looking for with a viewer.

MS: Right. It becomes a type of gift in a way if you allow it to be. When you let someone else take the reins and tell you what you’ve done, and you get to hear their vision. It's nice. It's a way of sharing, it's very personal.

JH: I want to talk a little bit more about the alligator motif that pops up a lot in your work. At first glance when I came in here, looking at this long horizontal painting that's going to be here in New York, I saw architecture, I saw landscape, I saw a street scene, I saw buildings. But then I quickly shed that as soon as I recognized the contours of this alligator head. Am I seeing the same thing?

MS: Yes.

JH: Is this the profile of one of your alligators?

MS: This time it’s the profile of multiple alligators, possibly the same particular one in different incarnations.

JH: It's abstracted, it's not overt, but that sort of elongated alligator. I know you’ve talked about alligators being outside of New Orleans in the swamps. It seems like an important character from your image bank. I imagine it's a fun shape to draw too.

MS: Yeah, that's part of the reason why I use it over and over. It can be a way of loosening up. I remember when I saw a specific alligator in Honey Island Swamp in Louisiana. Its name is Black Jaw. It’s obviously in the present but also you see and feel another time. Certain areas of New Orleans are the same way. It touches on looking and experiencing a different era, a different life, but within this one.

In this particular painting, I started layering alligators and maybe it became not just Black Jaw. Or if it is Black Jaw, it's him being reincarnated a few times and going through a few different swamps rather than just Honey Island.

JH: Right. It's abbreviated too. I mean I think your forms are rounded off and simplified in a way typically. It's not like a rendered alligator head, it's an elongated rectangle with a bulbous end. Then the tell, the show, is usually the teeth, which are triangles throughout.

You're using these geometric shapes to describe this head often. Again, it's going back to the flatness, you're painting in a flat way.

MS: Yes. By simplifying the forms I’m giving color more influence in the work.  

JH: The alligator is a starting point, as a form, as a shape, as an idea and you just unfold it from there. It turns into a few other things, sort of holds on to its identity as an alligator. I love that. Is this an alligator too? This one is a front view maybe.

MS: That's a doll with a hairdo above a profiled alligator whose teeth have left its mouth and even become a little hat. The paper behind it is space. There’s a foot behind the canvas drawn on the paper. It’s a hidden self-portrait.

JH: Do you remember the last piece of culture that you experienced? Maybe it was a book you read or a film you saw or an artwork or a piece of music that shook your bones?

MS: Definitely. This past August I was in residency at the Macedonia Institute in upstate New York. That’s where I painted the hemp painting for the Ace New York show. During that time I read Chief of Chiefs: Robert Nathaniel Lee and the Mardi Gras Indians of New Orleans, 1915-2001 by Al Kennedy. Chief Robbe was the first and only person to be named "chief of chiefs" by the Mardi Gras Indian Council. I would read and then paint. I enjoyed the book so much I read it in small increments so it would take longer to finish.

MS: I remember being a kid and seeing Mardi Gras Indians for the first time. I was in the car with my dad. We were leaving the St. Charles Mardi Gras parades driving back through neighborhoods to get home, and then all of a sudden we saw Mardi Gras Indians masking. They resembled human fireworks. It was amazing. Reading Al’s book was inspiring because it’s such a wonderful story of being called to an art form and how tough yet rewarding it is to be dedicated to a practice that you love. Chief Robbe’s story reminded me of how fortunate I am to have grown up in New Orleans and experienced such a unique culture.

[jolteonjordansh]

Day 1: “Successor”

Synopsis: It’s been five years since Wes and Rui have defeated the criminal syndicate Cipher, and since their disbandment the duo have advanced their travels to a wider scale as they visit multiple regions. Upon making their recent arrival to the tropical region of Alola however, Rui discovers the potential uprising of old adversaries.

Author’s Note: It’s the first day of 2017’s Orre Week! I hope to get everything in on time, but if I don’t I’ll still be sure to post everything I have planned! This may disappoint some people, but this is pretty much the only prompt that will directly connect to the events of Pokémon Colosseum. My focus will be the events after Pokémon XD: Gale of Darkness. But this is a story I wanted to get out. I should confess though: This is actually my first time drawing Wes and Rui. Okay, maybe not first time ever—I did an old comic back in elementary school regarding origin stories of this duo, but my headcanon has drastically changed since then and I can’t even find the original material. Still, this is my first time actually drawing default Wes and Rui and as much as I wish it was better, I’m mostly happy with how it turned out! Still, I never realized how ridiculous Wes’ hair is… lol

I hope we all have a great Orre Week, and I hope you guys like my contributions! I’ll admit, I’m a bit nervous as this is some of the first writing I’ve posted online in years, so I could be a bit rusty. Proceed under the break to read today’s one-shot!

His black boots trampled against the wooden stairs as Wes trekked up to the next floor, his Espeon and Umbreon trotting adjacent to his left and right. Reaching into a pocket in his blue coat, he pulled out a card as he made his way towards a door. Placing the card up against the knob, it clicked and he opened the door as he and his Pokémon companions passed through the door.

“Oh, you’re back already?”

Wes looked towards one of the beds, where Rui laid back as Espeon stood up to the side of the bed, rubbing his head against her hand with a soft purr. She was one of the few sights that could crack a genuine smile out of Wes, and he nodded as the door shut behind him. “The trainers are still pretty sparse around here, but I’ve noticed they have quite a close connection with their Pokémon, even if they’re not as challenging as some from the other region.”

“Yeah, a lot of them walk around with their Pokémon everywhere. There’s so many cute companions around here!” She giggled, looking down at the pink feline and his approaching ebony ally. “But not as cute as you two, of course.”

“Don’t spoil them Rui. They’ll become too content with all of the attention you give them.”

“Oh, relax. You keep them well-trained as it is. Just because you’re not as affectionate doesn’t mean I can’t be,” She reached her hands as she pet them both, their purrs harmonizing.

“You make it sound like I don’t care for them at all. These guys are the closest thing I have to family,” Wes sat down on the adjacent bed. “And how have you enjoyed your down time?”

“Oh, I just woke up from a nap. I can’t believe how much there is to do on Melemele Island! This place is just so beautiful, and this region still has other islands we can visit. I had to have a day to take it all in!”

“I guess this is our most relaxing visit yet. I guess you made the right decision picking it out.”

“It’s almost like if Agate Village were a whole island. I think I’m ready to pick it out for the both of us to stay here!”

“Come on, cut that out. You’re being silly,” Wes looked down and scratched underneath the chins of his companions, noticing what seemed like a pair of smirks between them. “I still want to be able to go back to Orre too. I’ve got pals to meet up with at the Outskirt Stand when we go back, if hell hasn’t frozen over and Officer Johnson hasn’t caught them.”

“I know, and I want to go see grandma and grandpa when I can too,” Rui looked over towards the TV running in the background as she held the remote out. “I do hope they’re doing alright though. The P*DA’s service doesn’t really work outside of Orre, and you know how my grandparents are with technology…”

“You’re not trying to search for the ONBS through the TV service here again, are you? You’ve done that in every region we’ve visited, and you’re never successful. I get that you’re so blown away by how many channels they all have, but ONBS just has too limited of a broadcast.”

“I just want to try, alright? Is that such a bad thing to do?”

“Well, alright. I’m just saying it’s probably a hopeless cause,” Wes shrugged as he scratched behind Espeon and Umbreon’s ears, listening to their shrills of delight as his two friends turned over towards him instead and leaned into his hands. His ears blocked out the clicking of the TV, staring into the violet and red eyes blinking at him as he gave them a gentle smile.

I do wonder how things are in Orre, His mind wandered, but easily he remembered just how little Orre had changed in his time living there. Even in his life living alongside Team Snagem, his life had been mundane. The places he saw never changed. The people barely changed. Regulations never changed. Even when Cipher had reared their ugly heads into the scene, only a handful of people took action.

The police force was nearly nonexistent after all, as Chief Sherles and Officer Johnson were the only ones who strived for any sort of peace. Only the occasional bystanders like Duking ever bothered to step in. There was the Kids’ Grid, of course, but they were just as their name implied—kids. As skilled as they were with technology, they didn’t have the resources to reach any further than Orre. For all Wes knew, they could have been continuing with their usual work behind the scenes in The Under as he and Rui continued to travel.

But Orre had found peace after he had stepped in, and that was what mattered. The usual petty crimes of bandits and lone wolves would continue throughout the region, but he wasn’t a superhero meant to handle the region’s problems. These were mere misdemeanors that would take care of themselves. The world was built to handle those who could survive in it, and nature would take its course. It was only if humanity strayed nature too far from its course that it required such interference.

Still, I can’t help but wish to see Orre improve for the better. Solving everyone’s problems is a nice thought, just not feasible, He ruffled his hands against Espeon and Umbreon’s heads. I suppose it’s just best to believe Orre is on a road towards improvement.

“Wes!”

He lifted his head up at the sound of her gasp. “What? You didn’t seriously find it, did you?”

“In a way, but… Not in a way I was hoping. Look!”

As Rui sat up and pointed towards the screen, like an excited child pointing out her favorite superhero, what she pointed towards was nothing to be thrilled for. A bold red banner laid at the bottom of the screen, reading its news report.

“Orre News Broadcast Station Attempts ‘Shadow Pokémon’ Hoax”

“What…?” The words squeezed out of Wes’ mouth like a ghastly breath.

“Today on the Pokémon Conspiracy Network, we have probably one of our strangest stories in years,” A red-haired woman appeared on camera as video footage played to the left of her. “From the obscure ‘Orre Region’, we received word of supposed news reports of an entire city being taken over by a criminal organization named Cipher, with weapons the news station— ONBS—has reported as ‘Shadow Pokémon’.”

“Why would ONBS report false news? I know they weren’t the most accurate when I blew Gonzap’s base, but this doesn’t sound right…” Wes mumbled.

“If this story sounds crazy enough to you, don’t take our word for it—Here’s the full footage of ONBS’ supposed news report,” The camera panned away from the woman as the video to her left then filled the screen. It was the usual ONBS set-up, but rather than having the station’s standard broadcast woman reporting the news, a somewhat familiar brown-haired boy sat alongside a monitor playing back footage, with the young narrator beginning his speech.

“Hello, viewers! This is Secc, ONBS’ Director. We bring you a special scoop.”

“No way… That’s Secc? He really grew up!” Rui exclaimed.

“And he’s ONBS’ Director? I guess that was only a natural progression for him in Orre, the kid being so smart…” Wes then rose his hand in a gentle hushing manner, as Rui’s voice calmed to whispers of disbelief.

“The courageous actions of a young boy thwarted a group of Cipher operatives who had infiltrated Phenac City,” The monitor’s camera then panned towards a young boy with long red hair clad in yellow, a strange mechanical arm adorning the left half of his body. “This footage shows the boy and his Pokémon driving off a top Cipher Admin from the city’s Stadium.”

Wait, that machine… That can’t be…! Wes’ eyes widened as the robotic arm caught his attention, subconsciously glancing towards his own left arm to the machine that he wore as rusty armor, his voice reduced to a raspy whisper. “That’s Phenac City, no doubt about it…”

“I don’t think we ever saw that guy from Cipher though. He… kind of looks like Ein had a little too much fun at a costume party,” Rui said.

“He’s got a weird get-up, I’ll give you that,” Wes added.

“Cipher had been trying to take over the entire city by replacing its citizens with the syndicate’s members,” Secc continued. “ONBS was also targeted for takeover by Cipher. Despite this setback, Cipher appears to be growing more active.”

“Wait, they tried to take over ONBS too!?” Rui piped up.

“So did Venus try that nonsense again? At least it sounds like Orre’s smartened up to know not to let them influence them… I bet the whole Kids’ Gridd works for ONBS now. That’s why they managed to actually capture good coverage of Cipher… if this is real.”

“Wes, you don’t really think Secc would fake thi—“

“Hang on, let it finish Rui.”

“The authorities have issued a caution to all citizens and organizations to be alert to the possibility of further attacks,” Secc said. “As you have seen, Cipher has returned with a vengeance. The entire Orre Region is endangered again. ONBS promises to doggedly pursue this story and provide you with the most accurate information on Cipher’s actions,” A look of determination flashed into Secc’s eyes, one Wes recognized from nearly half a decade ago. “We must not allow Cipher to carry out its conspiracy of fear. Let us all protect the peace of Orre with courage!”

And with a final outcry, the video faded to black, returning to the red-haired woman at the center stage of the TV recording. “The ONBS report was sent to multiple news stations from Kanto to Hoenn. However, most officials have dictated the footage to be false and controversial at best. The so-called ‘Shadow Pokémon’ that were reported could not be seen in the footage, as the battle seemed no different than any other Pokémon battle,” The woman explained. “The obvious bias towards the Orre Region and justice for it also leads officials to believe that the report was put together to gather attention towards a region even I have never heard of before.”

“Of course that battle seemed regular to you guys!” Rui’s face turned red with anger as she found herself getting up out of bed. “Normal humans can’t see Shadow Pokémon! You wouldn’t know the difference unless you watched the battle closer!”

“Rui…” Wes murmured.

“While the report talks as if these attacks have happened before, we could not find any evidence of such incidents between several news stations through multiple regions. It seems the whole ‘issue’ is a self-contained show with over the top acting, particularly with the ridiculous cloaked man. For now, the ‘Cipher’ reports are being dismissed. We’ll show you what other locals had to say after seeing this stage sho—“

The TV blinked off as Rui held out the remote, slamming it down next to the TV as she turned around to Wes. “I can’t believe these people! The ONBS is actually reaching out to other places in the world and they won’t listen because Cipher’s work has always been so under-handed and secretive! How was any of that fake!? Secc and the other kids would never lie and spread it around like that!”

“Rui, you need to calm down. You’re hardly rational right now,” Wes hushed.

“I’m not rational!? Wes, you should be mad too! That’s our home these conspiracy jerks are talking down about, and our friends too! They’re hardly being reasonable about this to! And everyone could all be in grave danger but no one else is bothering to get involved!”

“Rui,” Wes stood up as he placed a finger on her lips, immediately silencing her ranting. “Let’s think through this, alright?”

Her shoulders slouching, Rui sighed as she looked up at Wes with her blue eyes crying of despair. “Wes, I just… I can’t believe this is happening again, and we weren’t there for it… What if this has been going on since we left?”

“I can’t imagine it’s been going on for that long. I know our connection with Orre has been limited in the last five years, but we’ve found ways to send e-mails at some places with wired connections. I would have gotten an urgent message back when we visited the PokéCom Center in Johto last year. It must have been within the last few months at most.”

“I guess… But do you really think this was faked?”

“No, I think there’s some legitimate news here. Sure, Secc was pretty vocal about justice for Orre, but… He’s not wrong. And I wouldn’t put it past Cipher to take over a city. Evice posed as mayor for Phenac City all while we remained unaware, and they built a whole tower for themselves. They have resources and connections, without a doubt.”

“Yeah, this has to be legit… But it doesn’t look like Orre is completely vulnerable.”

“You’re right. They had a boy fighting that Cipher Admin, not to mention that mechanical arm…”

Rui nearly felt her soul leap right out of her skin as she recalled the machine Wes had just pointed out to her. “Wait, you don’t think that was a…!?”

Wes nodded. “It’s got all the parts. That kid had a Snag Machine on him, no doubt about it.”

“Do you think maybe Team Snagem is working with Cipher again, and that boy got his hands on their Snag Machine?”

Wes snickered. “That thing looked way too fancy to be Snagem’s handiwork. Besides, they’d practically fallen apart by the time we left, but the Old Man insisted he’d bring Team Snagem back. Besides, after Cipher made a fool of themselves, he’s got bad blood with them. He told me all about it before we left.”

“So you went to see Gonzap even after everything that happened? Wouldn’t he have bad blood towards you?”

Wes shrugged. “It is what it is. I figured I’d at least try to set things straight with him. Either way, that kid doesn’t really look like Snagem material. Gonzap was barely willing to take me in at my age as it was. That Snag Machine was probably reverse engineered somehow, I’m sure. And if the boy fought off a Cipher Admin, sounds like he’s doing a lot of the dirty work.”

“I guess so… But I can’t believe Cipher would return, and with more Shadow Pokémon too…”

“Were you able to tell if that crony was using a Shadow Pokémon? Or maybe that kid?”

“I don’t know, I couldn’t really tell but the battle was pretty violent… Maybe since the footage is recorded and I’m not seeing the Pokémon directly, I couldn’t see the black aura around it.”

“I see… I guess that only makes sense,” Wes looked out towards the window, his yellow eyes gazing out away from Rui. “ It’s in their hands then.”

“In their hands!? That’s all you have to say!? Wes, we need to go back there and help! We can’t just leave Orre’s people and our friends and family out there to just deal with it!”

“What do you propose we do then?” Wes gave her a sharp glare. “You know as well as I do that finding a ferry that takes us back to Orre only comes once in a blue moon in regions like this. And there’s certainly no airports nearby. We couldn’t afford a private jet even if we wanted to.”

“What about your Skarmory? She can fly us there, can’t she?”

“She couldn’t fly two people to a far off region efficiently, that’s for sure. I can’t put that kind of stress on her.”

“But Wes, if we just try—“

“Rui,” All Wes needed to do was firmly say her name for her to realize she needed to calm down. There was a stiff silence between them, Rui’s heart dropping to the pit of her stomach as she began to understand Wes’ logic was sound—far more than her rampant emotions.

The silence held as if the legendary Celebi had entered the room, with time itself frozen to a halt. Umbreon and Espeon stared up towards the argument of their two human friends, but remained neutral with their own sense of tact. Only the soft sound of Wes’ feet shuffling and turning towards the door could be heard among them.

“Wes, I’m sorry. I just…” Rui broke the silence as Wes had turned away from her. “I want to help everyone back home. I can’t stand the thought of thinking they might be in trouble. I don’t know what I’d do if Cipher took over Agate Village and did something to grandma and grandpa.”

“I know it’s frustrating,” He extended his right arm out, as if signaling her to hush, but now with a sense of understanding. “I want safety for Orre too. There’s a reason I left Team Snagem so many years ago—I understood how important its people and Pokémon were. But we’re not in a position right now.”

Rui had no response. She didn’t have to remind him that he was right. He already knew, and she did too.

“But you have to remember too, just because we’re not there doesn’t mean Orre is helpless. I think it’s fair we give the rookie a chance.”

“Oh, the kid? You really think he can handle it though?” Rui asked.

“The footage spoke for itself, don’t you think?” Wes grinned. “He fought pretty well with his Pokémon, and defeated a Cipher Admin. It seems like he has the tools, especially if the Kids’ Grid have made connections with him.”

“You’re right… You always seem to figure things out quick, don’t you Wes?”

“I’ve got street smarts. That’s about as well as I can put it,” Wes turned back to her as he placed one of his hands over her shoulders, then gently bringing her into a supportive embrace. “I’m sorry if I came off as cruel. Why don’t we try to find a place like the PokéCom Center and connect my P*DA so we can communicate with the others? If we can do that, we can at least see if we need to make drastic measures to intervene and make sure everyone else is okay.”

“Yeah… That sounds good. Maybe we should go start asking around?”

“Sounds good to me,” Wes released Rui from her grasp, though reaching and holding her hand in support. “It’ll all be okay. I’m sure of it. And if worst comes to worst, we’ll make sure to fix everything.”

Rui nodded, as her eyes suddenly lit up. “Hey, maybe we can even spread awareness outside to the other regions so people believe that it’s true! We can tell them it’s no hoax!”

“I’m not sure how much they’ll believe us. To the rest of the world, we’re nobodies. But I suppose it couldn’t hurt.”

“Come on then, we shouldn’t waste time! Let’s get going!” Rui grasped Wes’ hand as she charged towards the door, Wes feeling his body being thrown forward along with her. Standing back up, Umbreon and Espeon yipped and skipped along as they followed after their master and his companion. The discovery of such a dire situation was disheartening to be sure, and perhaps now their master had more work to do.

But a new hero had stepped forward now, one they had now decided to place their trust into for the sake of the Orre Region.

[lavender-lotion]

By Our Side; Always | 2,262k

Find the rest here! Read on AO3 here!

From pumpkin picking to running into old friends. Loosing themselves within corn mazes and cuddling during b-grade horror movies.

This is Halloween with the Argent-Hale-Stilinski family.

Sequel to Meet The Families

“ October 31st - Halloween. If it features Halloween in anyway, this is the day for it. Trick-or-Treating, toilet papering houses, dressing up and going out, don’t care. Have fun! ” @tridom​

Stiles was excited!

Seriously he was all but bouncing on his toes as he dragged his husbands towards the rows upon rows of pumpkins. He was ecstatic, had been looking forward to the thirty-first for weeks now.

This was a big year for him, after all. It would be his first time in years that he would be living in a house during the holiday - meaning handing out candy, decorating the lawn, decorating everything else - but more so he would be living in his own home!

They’d been living in Beacon Hills for nearly half a year now, moving in right when Stiles graduated. At that point Peter had already moved most of his business so having a place to stay was essential. Because of that they had bought their house - really it was more like Chris and Peter bought a house and Stiles was just along for the ride - two months before Stiles’ grad, though Peter hadn’t done a thing for decorating. Instead he had bought a bed, the necessary kitchenware and toiletries, and left everything else.

He also came back every weekend, Friday all through Monday, so he was hardly even living in the house. Because of that moving in had been beyond exciting. Honestly, Stiles went a little wild, but this was his first home, and that was a big deal! By now they were settled, the feeling of overwhelming accomplishment that came from having one's own home slowly fading away.

But now it was October and that meant Halloween which meant decorations and themed treats and costumes and pumpkin spice lattes and actual fucking pumpkins!

Which is why Stiles is dragging his two grown husbands into a pumpkin patch primarily occupied by children and their relenting parents. It wasn’t as though he was expecting his men to be as excited as he was - hell Chris had turned forty-six this year, of course the man wasn’t excited about pumpkin picking - but Stiles was, and neither man were in the habit of denying their boy much.

Which was why they were letting him drag them through overgrown grass, Peter willingly dirtying his shoes - though he did cuff his pants as to keep them safe. The field was fairly large, kids running around as parents and young adults strolled by. The pumpkins were many, rows upon rows piled high and Stiles sped ahead, bouncing on his toes as he carefully examined the piles. He knew how to pick out pumpkins, had been doing so with a sharp eye for years now and only the best would do.

Stiles was fawning over a large pumpkin, looking at it intently to judge whether or not it really was perfect (he was 97% sure) when a large, dark pair of hands grabbed it from right in front of him. Stiles reeled back, outrage written across his features as he took a deep breath, preparing for his rant as he looked up. He squinted his eyes at the man before him, still as tall and as bald as ever and had no trouble placing him.

“Boyd!” He exclaimed happily, clapping his hands together. Stiles had gone an entire four years not seeing a single person from high school - which probably had a lot to do with his lack of friends during the years - and now that he was back always got excited. He liked hearing what certain people were up to - like when he found out Lydia Martin had gotten pregnant during her first year of University, dropped out and was now a besotted housewife to Jackson Whittmore, or how Greenberg was doing pretty good as an Indie actor.

“Uh, Stilinski?” The man asked, brows drawing close in concentration.

“Yep, that’s me! Oh my gosh dude, how are you?” Stiles shot right back, now bouncing on the balls of his feet, his smile huge.

“Uh, I’m good?” He said after a pause, shifting his weight back further from the boys excitement, “What are yo-”

The loud screech of “DADDY!” cut the man off as a small child barreled into his legs, followed quickly by a leggy blond.

“Erica Reyes?” Stiles said, eyes blown wide.

The woman just smirked, giving Stiles a serious once over before hefting the child onto her hip and saying, “Hey Batman.”

“Hey ba’man!” The boy echoed, dark, tight curls bouncing around his face as he spoke.

“Hey Catwoman, and little dude, hello!” Stiles enthused, holding up a fist and all but melting when the boy bumped theirs together, “Dude, so how have you been?”

Erica laughed at that, smiling widely, “We’ve been good. Busy, but good!”

“How old is this guy?”

“I’m three!” The boy announced, raising his chin with a huge grin.

“You are adorable!” Stiles told him sending a smile to Erica, “Gotta admit, totally rooted for you two.”

“Thank you, Stiles.” Boyd told him, taking his son from Erica and settling him onto his shoulders as the boy clapped in glee. “How have you been?”

“Great! Graduated earlier this year and moved back home. I got a place over on Snare Street! Where are you guys at? What are you up to?”

“Just over on Applebottom, been there since right after high school,” Erica went on, “This one came out the summer after we all Graduated. I work over at the studio on Elf and Boyd is in construction.”

She pulled her sleeve up showing off the full arm of tattoos and Stiles cooed, “Ohh nice!”

“Thank you.”

“What days are you in this week? I had a great artist before moving and really wasn’t sure if I’d even be able to find somo-” Stiles said it all quickly, grinding to a half when an arm settles around his waist. He turns to one of his faincé’s, smiling widely at Peter, “I found a tattoo artist!”

“Very good dear,” Peter says, glaring hard at the younger man, “Christopher and I do not appreciate being abandoned in such horrific conditions.”

“Oh my god,” Stiles sighed at the man's dramatics, but smiled and leaned into his sides nonetheless, “Okay, Erica and Boyd this is one of my husbands, Peter Hale.”

“One of?” Erica asked, her brows raising.

“Uh yeah oh, babe where is he,” Stiles stretched onto the balls of his feel, peering around the patch. It was busier then when they had first gotten there, the crowd of adults much thicker then it had first been. There were more kids as well, the noise level gently raising as more people piled in. Stiles couldn't stop the smile on his face, the excitement in the air getting to him as he scanned the crowd.

He saw dark brown hair greying at the temples and smiled wider, shouting out the man's name and waving, leaning further into Peter as he struggled to gain height, making sure the man could see him. The man could see him - obviously, considering there weren’t nearly as many people as Stiles had convinced himself - and the man nodded his head, eyes wrinkling slightly at the corners at the sight of Stiles’ excitement.

“And thi-s,” Stiles said, stretching out the word as Chris came near, snagging the man’s hand in his, “Is my other husband, Chris Argent!”

“Nice to meet you both,” He said politely.

“Right and these are Erica Reyes and Vernon Boyd and little dude!”

“My name is Damian. Named after the fifth and best Robin out there!” The boy sad proudly, grinning wide when Stiles burst out in laughter, offering Erica then Damian a fist bump.

“Good going, Catwoman, boy knows his stuff.”

“Only the best, Batman.”

“See, I told you this would be fun!” Stiles said, sounding as chipper as he could. He was trying to keep the mood up, keep their energy on the high as they continued to walk, corn grown high all around them.

“Stiles we have been lost for two hours I want to go home!” Which was true, and he could understand where Chris was coming from. The older man hadn’t wanted to come with Stiles through the maze, citing this exact situation as a reason to stay out. But Stiles was adamant they do everything Beacon Hills had to offer. It was their first year celebrating the holiday as husbands - as illegitimate as the term was in their case was, Stiles insisted on using it - and he was going to do it right. It as also their first time celebrating Halloween in Beacon Hills, and the town knew what they were doing.

“I said this was a bad idea.” Chris grumbled, voice a deep rumble. It had been nearly fifteen minutes since he’d last spoke and the man had his hands shoved in his pockets, walking behind Peter and Stiles whose hands were linked together, Stiles all but skipping along.

He was having a great time. Everything in October seemed so much better. The air was beginning to turn crisp, the trees changing into a gorgeous array of warmth. He got to wear sweaters every single day without being judged, was able to steal a copious amount of clothing from his men and they couldn't say anything about it because it was all in the name of staying warm. Everything smelled like cinnamon and pies were easy to come by.

October was awesome.

It didn’t matter to him that they’d gotten lost, he was having too much fun to mind as he dragged Peter along, the younger of his husbands being much better company at the moment. He was telling the man a story about his high school days, nostalgia brought on when he saw the couple a few days prior. He had never told his men much about his high school days, the number of good memories he had far outweighed by the bad, be he was happily reminiscing, enjoying the cool air as it nipped at his nose.

“Do you think we could try to get out?” Chris demanded, voice showing off his annoyance.

“Oh my god stop whining you’re forty-six!” Stiles snapped, glaring at the man.

“I am not whining, I am simply stating my dis-”

“Nope you’re whining and you’re grown man wh-”

“And you’re an insufferable chi-”

“Why don’t we all calm down-” Peter’s voice broke in, causing both men to shout his way.

“Back off, Peter.”

“Peter, not now!”

Both men looked away from where they’d turned to glare at the other man to instead stare at each other. They only lasted a moment before they started laughing, Chris a deep chuckle and Stiles an embarrassing giggle. Peter just smiled calmly at the two, before his lips twitched up into a wolfish grin.

“I just wanted to say that I thought of something a little more fun we could do,”

Stiles let out a little sigh, snuggling closer to Peter whose chest he was currently half atop of. The man was propped up by several pillows against their headboard and was the only one still paying attention to the horror movie on the TV. This was for him, after all, seeing as neither Chris nor Stiles particularly enjoyed them. Chris was curled around his back, one hand occasionally reaching for the bowl of pumpkin seeds in Peter’s lap and idly crunching on them.

Stiles just closed his eyes and cuddled deeper, sighing when Chris pressed his lips to the boy's neck, gently scraping his teeth over the skin. It were days like this that Stiles treasured, wrapped up in bed with the two men he loved more than he ever thought possibly. Sometimes he felt like he was bursting with it, with how much he felt for the two and he wasn’t sure how he was able to contain it all. He had never expected anything like this, could never have. He had spent so many years thinking he’d be alone - that he’d be too loud or too energetic or too weird for someone to ever really love him - and somehow he had found two people that made his life worth so much more.

And of course it sucked to never legally be married to either man, but it didn’t matter to him, not anymore. He had been calling them his husbands for months now, starting only weeks after the proposal. Only months earlier, during the summer after his graduation, Peter and Chris had organized a commitment ceremony. They decorated their new backyard in fairy lights and bright flowers, inviting those who meant the most to them to bare witness as they promised themselves to each other. He’d been given a second ring during the event, a thicker - and more diamond studded - version of his original engagement.

He twirled them both now, smiling into Peter’s chest as Chris’ arm wrapped tighter around his waist, the ridiculous screaming of the b-grade horror movie lulling him to sleep.

“Trick or treat!”

“Oh my god you are so cute!”

“Trick or treat!”

“Dude sick costume!”

“Trick or treat!”

“Oh my pumpkin my heart!”

“Trick or treat!”

“YES!”

“Trick or treat!”

“Wow, gotta say I’m more of an avengers guy but that group costume is awesome!!”

“Trick or treat!”

“Epic!”

“Trick or treat!”

“You are the cutest thing I have ever seen!”

“Trick or treat!”

“I want one!”

“Trick or treat!”

“Christopher I want a child, do something about it!”

“Trick or treat!”

“A BUNNY!”

“Trick or treat!”

“What are you?”

“Trick or treat!”

“Would you like a candy, my lady?”

“Trick or treat!”

“Taking the night off from fighting crime, huh?”

“Trick or treat!”

“No Stiles let that child go we can’t keep them!”

[thelandofmrsparkle]

A Glossary Of Terms

1-kyu:

First level. As in the top level of the Japanese Language Profiency Test!

A man:

Ten thousand. Sounds cool, don't it?

Anime:

Cartoon.

Apato:

Apartment.

Apato Biru:

Apartment building.

Apropos:

Appropriate (French).

Arubaito:

Part-time job, esp. one for students.

Asa-gohan:

Breakfast (lit. "morning rice").

Base brat:

Someone whose parent(s) was (were) military personnel, therefore necessitating living on military bases and multiple traumatic cross-country moves during childhood.

Bento:

Japanese boxed lunch.

Bit:

Slang for stole, copied, and/or plagerized..

Blocking:

A stage term that means where actors are supposed to stand on-stage.

BOE:

JET abbreviation for Board Of Education.

Boshi:

A hat or baseball cap.

Bosozoku:

Young Japanese gang members who ride around on real noisy, super-modified motorcycles (lit. "speed tribes").

Bougie:

Slang term for "bourgeois"

Bunkasai:

School "culture festival;" a bizarre mix of talent show, open house and carnival.

Bureki:

Brakes.

Can't Be Arsed:

See "couldn't be arsed."

Carte blanche:

The freedom to do whatever you please (French).

-Chan:

Attached to someone's name to infer affection for that person as a friend. Also used to indicate that the person being refered to is a child.

Chelsea Smile:

Inserting a knife into the mouth of a person one is assaulting and cutting at either end of the mouth, so as to extend the victim's smile in a grotesque fashion.

Chikan:

Pevert or molester. See also hentai

Chimpira:

A low-level yakuza.

Chi chi fou fou:

Fancy.

Cho:

Very. See also totemo.

Chotto:

A little.

Chugakko:

Junior high school.

Chugakkusei:

Junior high school student.

Conbini:

Convenience store (Montréalers: depanneur), which are ubiquotous in Japan.

Couldn't Be Arsed:

English slang, meaning "couldn't be bothered." Also works as "can't be arsed."

Crust:

A style of punk rock known for its death metal-esque vocals and overall severity. Crust punks are well known for their aversion to personal hygeine and love of mescaline.

Dafuya:

A ticket scalper.

Daibutsu:

Buddah. Or, more commonly, a giant-ass statue of the Buddah.

Daigakko:

University.

Daikyuu:

A day off in lieu of having worked on a regular day off (e.g. do-yobi).

Dame, dame:

Forbidden, as in "don't do that!"

(da)Saitama:

A nickname for Saitama City used by the more cosmopolitan Tokyoites. Dasai means "uncool."

Deets:

Slang term for "details."

Denki:

Electricity; or, electronics store.

Depato:

Department store.

Deshita:

Was. Kind of.

Dinkus:

Dink (Latin).

DIY:

"Do It Yourself." A punk rock manifesto/slogan (North America) or the way to describe homeowner-done home renovations (Merry Olde England).

Dodgu baru:

Dodge ball (formerly known as murder ball).

Dojo:

A school or building devoted to martial arts.

Domo arigato gozaimashita:

"Thank you very much."

Dorama:

Katakanasized English for "drama," meaning "soap opera."

Dosh:

Money. Sorry, I've been renting to many "there's gangsters in London"-type movies lately!

Do-yobi:

Would be Saturday, wouldn't it now?

Echo Parque:

Echo Park. A neighbourhood in Los Angeles (Spanish).

Eigo:

English.

Eikawa:

English conversation school.

El Jefe:

The boss (Spanish).

Enkai:

The legendary "office party" of Japan, where you colleagues try to get you as drunk as possible. Notorious for being the social occassion where the reserved and meek Japanese people you work with go off and get nuts.

Ethiopia no ryoori:

Ethiopian food. Look, just put any country before no ryoori and you are talking about the food of that country. It's just that easy!

FA:

Fuck All

Fameru, the:

The other, more centrally-located but crappier, apartment building wherein almost all the other AET's working for the Saitama-shi are housed.

Flossing:

Wearing clothing or jewelry in a flashy, homologic manner.

Flush:

In the wacky world of poker, five cards of the same suit. A good hand.

Furikomi:

Transferring money from your bank account to someone else's.

Fushigi:

Weird, as in spooky or mysterious weird. Like an Astro-boy action figure spookily and mysteriously "floating" in a Denny's toy. Hello? Go back and read the sentence again!

Gaijin:

Foreigner. Non-Japanese.

Gaijin cado:

The "Alien Registration Card" that every foreigner living here is required to carry at all times.

Gaikokku:

Foreign country or countries. Any country or countries that is not Japan.

Gakusei:

Student. Or students. Depending.

Game senta:

Arcade ("game centre" - get it?).

Ganbaranai!:

"Don't try!" "Why bother?" "Do a half-assed job, if even that much." The opposite of ganbatte.

Ganbatte yo!:

"Fight!" "Try hard!" "Do your best!" J-folk never tire of uttering these words of encouragement at every opportunity.

Genkan:

That part of a J-house right after the front door where you take off your shoes. Considered part of "outside," so if you don't leave your door locked here, don't be surprised when delivery guys, Jehovah's Witnesses, the cops and the NHK guy just open your front door and stand in the genkan, calling for you!

Genki:

Healthy, happy, in good spirits, socialable, frisky. Pick one or a combination thereof.

Genkikunai:

Unhealthy, unhappy, in poor spirits, unsocialable, not frisky. Pick one or a combination thereof.

Geri:

Either diarrhea or having sex with your girlfriend. Can't remember which one, but either way, geri is a top-notch excuse to give your supervisor when you want the day off. Though I'd recommend seiri-tsuu for the ladies.

Getsu-yobi:

Monday. You didn't read the week one entry very closely, did you?

Gi:

Martial arts uniform. Costume? Get-up? No, uniform!

Giving us the hi-hat:

1920's gangster slang for being snubbed or disrespected, see?

Glasgow Kiss:

A head butt.

Gobsmacked:

Flabbergasted; astounded; shocked (English slang).

Gomen nasai:

"I'm sorry."

Haafu:

Katakanized English for "half," which is how mixed-"race" offspring of one Japanese parent & one gaijin are actually refered to here!

Hanabi:

Fireworks.

Hanamizu:

Snot (lit. "nose water").

Hanko:

A stamp or personal seal, used in lieu of a signature on most legal documents, bank forms, etc.

Hansomu:

Jinglish for "handsome."

Harajuku:

A popular district of central Tokyo, known for attracting throngs of young people dressed to nines in all manner of garb. Particulary on Sundays!

Hawdkoah:

The New York City pronounciation of "hardcore", a style of punk music.

Hella:

San Francisco slang for "very" (lit. "hell of").

Hentai:

Pervert. See also chikan.

Hiragana:

One of the Japanese syllabic alphabets.

Hisashiburi ne!:

"Long time, no see!"

Ichi-nensei:

First-year students (Canadian translation: 7th grade).

Inaka:

The country. A rural area.

Isofuckingashii:

Bufuckingsy.

Itabashi-sensei:

My supervisor at the Saitama Board of Education.

Itai:

"That hurts!" lit."ouch!"

Italian run-through:

When an actor, in rehearsal, goes through their lines as quickly as possible. Used to assist with line memorization

Itari no ryoori:

Italian food.

Izakaya:

Japanese-style drinking/eating bars designed to accomodate larger groups of drunks.

Janken:

Rock, Paper, Scissors.

JET:

The Japan Exchange Teaching program - how I managed to fanagle my way into this country.

Jet Coaster:

Roller coaster.

Jido hanbaiki:

Vending machine.

Jiko shokai:

A self-introduction - a prepared speech used to introduce yourself to others.

Jitensha:

A bicycle.

Joie de vivre:

"Joy of life." (French)

Jozu:

Skilled, talented, impressive.

Jofuckingzu:

Skilfuckingled, talenfuckingted, imfuckingpressive.

JTE:

JET program jargon for a Japanese Teacher of English.

Judo:

A Japanese martial art involving the throwing of people. Derived from ju jitsu, another Japanese martial art.

Juku:

Lit. "cram school." Private tutoring-style schools most kids go to after regular school, to give them that edge on the all-important, life-determining exams they face at the end of junior and senior high school.

Ju-ni-nichi matsuri:

Some sort of weird festival in Urawa that appears to celebrate December 12th. Literally translates to "The Festival of the 12th."

Kafucho:

Hay fever. But really, pollen allergy, esp. cedar pollen allergy. Which is bad news given that 60% of Japan's forests were clearcut to make way for cedar plantations.

Kai-yobi:

Tuesday. You didn't read the week one entry very closely, did you?

Kame:

Turtle.

Kana:

The Japanese written language, composed of the hiragana, katakana and kanji alphabets.

Kanji:

The Japanese characters that are actually Chinese characters and usually have two or three totally unrelated pronunciations and meanings. Oh, and there are thousands upon thousands of them, too.

Kanpai:

Cheers/Skoal/Here's Mud In Yer Eye.

Kare rice:

As near as I can figure out the Japanese pronounciation for "curry rice," a popular Japanized curry dish.

Kasa:

Umbrella.

Katakana:

The Japanese syllabic alphabet reserved for non-Japanese words.

Katana:

Those cool samurai swords. Also, an iconic "rice rocket" made by Kawasaki.

Kawaii:

Cute.

Keitai:

A cellular telephone. Which you would have ascertained, had you continued reading the sentence.

Kendo:

A Japanese martial art involving wooden swords and the hitting of people with them.

Kenkyujo:

The proper pronounciation of the Japanese word for Research centre. Specifically, the Saitama City BOE research centre.(see also kinkyujo).

Kimpura:

Um, marinated shredded vegetables? Not entirely sure, but I eat it!

Kin Jeh:

Vegetarian. Though I cain't recall if it means "vegetarian food" or "vegetarian person." Ask Thi. She'll know. (Thai).

Kinkyujo:

Research centre. Specifically, the Saitama City BOE research centre.

Kin-yobi:

Come on. If moku-yobi was Thursday and this followed Thursday, what the hell day do you think it is?

Kissaten:

Café/coffee shop.

Koban:

Police box - a little, mini-office where at least one cop is always present. Thousands of thems all over Japanese neighbourhoods, which is sometimes credited as a reason for Japan's low crime rate.

Kocho-sensei:

Principal (lit. "head teacher").

Koguro:

aka "ko-gals." Lit. translating to "high school girls," this refers to a Japanese female youth subculture where teenage girls bleach their hair, tan themselves as dark as possible, wear a lot of white makeup and dress as cute as possible. Think Britany Spears as done by David Lynch and you are getting close to what it's like.

Kokkoi:

Cool.

Konnichiwa:

Hello/Good day.

Konshu:

This week.

Kowe:

Scary (refering to males).

Kowaii:

Scary.

Kuro:

Black.

Kyoto-sensei:

Vice-Principal.

Kyudo:

Japanese archery.

Kyuryobi:

Payday.

Lactards:

The lactose intolerant; usually those whose bodies do not produce the enzyme required to digest the protein lactose, found in milk and diary products.

La Comida Mexicana:

Mexican food (Spanish).

Live House:

A bar where bands play. The tweaked thing is that, unless the band is huuuge, they probably have to rent out the venue, PA & staff and produce the show themselves. Cost? 300,000 - 400,000 yen! Yipes!

Maddog:

To glare at someone in as threatening a manner as possible.

Maka:

The accepted abbreviation of Makadonorado.

Makadonorado:

McDonald's - an American fast-food restaurant chain, popular in Japan. See also Maka.

Mamachari:

A "shopping bike" - a rickety old-style bike with a basket on the front and sometimes the back. The kind you'd expect to see grandmas trucking around on. Which they do. Along with everyone else.

Man:

10,000.

Manga:

A Japanese comic book, which are read by children and adults alike and cover every possible topic and story, including golf, tennis and, of course, pornography.

Mansion:

Hilariously enough, what they call really big multimulti unit apartment buildings!

Matsuri:

Festival.

Megane:

Eyeglasses.

Meishi:

Business card (lit. "name card").

Melonpan:

A melon-flavoured bun. Also, a character on the popular children's television series Ampanman. Whose title character is a flying superhero with a sweet bean-paste-filled bun for a head.

Merde:

"Shit," in French.

Mi Vida Loca:

"My Crazy Life." In this case, a pretty good gang film. Not the Ricky Martin song (Spanish).

Moku-yobi:

Come now, you deduced that this was Thursday all by yourself, didn't you?

Moleto:

Wallet (Spanish). Possibly the only spanish word I remember from that summer class I took four years ago.

Mugly:

Weather so hot and humid ("muggy") that it is downright ugly ("ugly"). Just because I made a word up does not mean that it should not be in everyone's lexicon.

Muzukashii:

Difficult.

Nasi goreng:

Thee scrumptious, rice-based national dish of Indonesia.

Natsukashii:

Kind of when something caused you to reminisce in a happy, sentimental, "ah, the memories!" way.

Ne?:

"Isn't it so?/Don't you think?" Liberally inserted at the end of practically any sentence. Similar to the Canadian "Eh?" Or the Parisian "quoi?" Or the Québecois "la." Etc.

Neko:

Cat.

Nenkyu:

Paid vacation time. Which, in theory and according to your JET contract, you can book off with your supervisor without much problem. In theory.

Nihon-go:

Japanese language.

Nihon-go no sensei:

Japanese language teacher.

Nihon-jin:

A Japanese person.

Nihon ryoori:

Japanese food.

Niku nashi onegai dekimasu ka:

Could you pretty please make that without putting dead animal parts on it?

Ni-nensei:

Second-year students (Canadian translation: 8th grade.

Nissei:

Second-generation Japanese living somewhere other than Japan.

Nomihodai:

A special and popular deal at Japanese bars, where you and your friends may drink all you possibly can in a set period of time, for a set price.

Nova usagi-chan:

The annoying animated rabbit mascot of the largest chain of private English schools in Japan, whose theme song is permanently ingraved on my memory thanks to heavy airplay of their TV commericals. "Ippai kikite, ippai shaberuru NOVANOVA!".

Off-book:

A stage term meaning that an actor has memorized their part and can or will rehearse without having to look at the script.

Ohayo gozaimasu:

Good morning.

Ogenki desu ka?:

How are you? (honorific form).

Oishii:

Delicious.

Ojiisan:

Grandfather. But let's not start singing about his stupid fucking clock, ok?

OLs:

"Office Ladies." Women working low-level secretarial/receptionist/clerk positions in Japanese offices, until they get married and stop all this silly nonsense about having a career. Which means pretty much any woman working in an office in Japan, since, of course, only men should be promoted or hold positions of importance or responsibility.

Omiyage:

Little individually-wrapped snacks you bring back from a trip to anywhere for all your co-workers. A major Japanese tradition.

Onigirii:

Popular J-snack of a triangle of rice wrapped in seaweed, usually with a fishy or seaweedy centre.

Onsen:

Hot spring. J-folk loooove love love to visit the innumerable hot springs dotted around Japan on their vacations.

Onis:

Demons.

Otaku:

Nerds. But especially obsessive-compulsive collecting nerds.

Pachinko:

This wildly-popular but weird gambling game involving a sort of vertically-mounted pinball machine, hundreds of steel balls, prizes and a lot of noise and flashiness.

Pit justice:

A straight-edge slang term for physically attacking someone in the dance area of a punk rock concert.

Player:

One who maintains a high level of romantic popularity and multiple romantic relationships.

Poutine:

French I mean Freedom Fries smothered in a special gravy and then covered with melting cheese curds. Québec's national dish, right above chien chaud steamée.

Purikura:

Special arcades specializing in those cute photo sticker booths where you take pictures with your friends and then customize them like mad.

Quelle Surprise:

"What a surprise!" (French).

Queue:

A line of people. (British).

Queuing:

Lining up (British).

Restos:

A Montréal abbreviation for "restaurants" (probably French).

Reverse:

Puke (verb).

Roku-nensei:

6th graders.

Romanji:

What they call the Roman (read: English-language) alphabet o'er here.

Ryokan:

A traditional-style Japanese inn.

SaiSta:

Slang for former World Cup venue Saitama Stadium.

Saisho RU! Janken PON!:

What J-people say instead of "1,2, 3!" when playing Janken. (see Janken).

Saitama BOE:

The Saitama City Board of Education.

Saitama-ken:

The prefecture of Saitama. A prefecture is like a province or state. 47 of 'em in Japan!

Salary(wo)man:

Business(wo)man. But pretty much always men. Women who work in offices are OLs.

San-nensei:

Third-year students (Canadian translation: 9th grade.

Seiri-tsuu:

Menstrual cramps.

Sempai:

The more senior, and therefore, superior person in a given work/school situation.

Sensei:

The honorific term for teacher.

Senta Gyaru:

Katakaniz'd English for "Centre Girl," which refers to a mostly-female subculture of high school girls who hang around Shibuya's Centre Street dresses in animal costumes with their hair dyed as unnaturally fluorescent as possible, with fake jewels glued on their faces. See also koguro.

Senta Guy:

The male version of a senta gyaru.

Seppuku:

Japanese ritual suicide.

Servo:

Brain (French).

Shag:

Fuck (British slang).

Shanked:

To be stabbed with a homemade or improvised knife.

Shibuya:

A popular district in central Tokyo for shopping, food, or dates. I like to pronounce it "shi- BOO-YA!" but somehow I don't think that's very original of me. Satisfying, though!

Shinjuku:

A popular district in central Tokyo, known for its nightlife.

Shinkansen:

Tha bullet train! Pow! Zip!

Shippu:

Stinky ointment-laced gauze. Did you not read the sentence or something?

Shizzy:

Slang term for shiznit, which is, in itself, a slang term.

Shiznit:

The stuff, the deal, etc.

Shogakko:

Elementary school.

Shogakkusei:

Elementary school students. I mean, in only follows, right?

Shogunai:

"It can't be helped." The J-way of saying, "sorry, you're fucked!"

Shogunakatta:

Past tense of shogunai.

Shojin ryoori:

Lit. "temple food." Special Japanese vegetarian you'll find at Buddhist temples, emphasizing elements of Buddhism in food form.

Shoppingu:

Shopping.

Shoppu:

Shop. See, it's not so hard, hey?

Shouganai:

It can't be helped/there's nothing to be done about the situation.

SIKE!:

1980's slang for "I tricked you!", yelled at the tricked in a mocking tone.

Skint:

British slang for flat-ass broke.

Slowplayed:

To have played a strong hand weakly, by checking instead of betting or by calling instead of raising. Usually done to win extra bets by keeping more players around for future rounds of betting. Thank you U of A type Jonathan Schaeffer for the definition!

Somen:

A type of Japanese noodle, usually served in a tasty soup.

Souji:

Cleaning/cleaning time.

-Sugoi:

Great.

Sui-yobi:

Wednesday. You should be getting the hang of the yobis now, right?

Sumimasen:

Excuse me/pardon me/sorry 'bout that. One of the handiest and most oft-used expressions in The Japan. Learn it, live it, love it.

Sumo:

You know, those really big fat Japanese guys that wrestle each other? Like in that Weezer video!

Support:

What English people call the opening act.

Tabernac:

The short version of tabernacle, which is essentially the French equivalent of "fuck."

Tacoyaki:

A super-popular Japanese streetfood, consisting of chopped octopus cooked in little balls of batter, served with tons of mayo and dried fish flakes. Taco=octopus, which can be a bit of a surprise if you are trying to order la comida Mexicana.

Taiko:

Japanese drums/drumming.

Taikukan:

Gym.

Takyuubin:

Delivery/courier company.

Tarento:

"Talent" - minor celebrities and personalities that populate the game/talk shows that comprise 90% of Japanese television.

Tatami:

Rice-straw mats that serve as flooring in traditional Japanese rooms. Most houses have at least one tatami room and rooms in Japan are measured according to how many tatami mats they fit or would fit.

Terebi:

Television.

Terebi dorama

TV drama.

'The Bash:

Our nickname for Itabashi-sensei.

The filth:

English slang for police.

The Old Bill:

Slightly-more polite English slang for police.

The River:

The last card dealt in a hand of poker. What Mile End Poker Society members would term "fifth street."

Tomodachi:

Friend.

Tori:

Chicken.

Totemo:

Very. See also cho.

Toyu:

Kerosene.

Tweaker:

Amerian west coast slang for person addicted to methamphetamine, aka speed.

Udon:

A broad noodle.

Unko:

Shit.

Urusai:

Shut up (lit. "[too] noisy/loud!").

Usagi:

Rabbit.

Utage:

I honestly have no fucking idea what "utage" means. Can anyone help me out here? Good fucking alcohol, though. Real tasty, that there utagehol.

Vick:

Victimize.

Vignette:

A short scene (French).

Wa, The:

Harmony. Balance.

Wakarimasen:

"I don't understand." See also wakarinai.

Wakarimashita:

To understand, past tense, formal.

Wakarinai:

The less polite, informal version of "I don't understand." See also wakarimasen.

Wakaru:

The unconjugated form of "to understand."

Wakatta:

The shortened, informal, past tense form of "to understand."

White Day:

A special, Japanese-only holiday invented so that Japanese men could buy Japanese women white gifts and/or chocolate, partially to reciprocate them for having received gifts and/or chocolate on Valentine's Day. Which, in Japan, is when only men receive gifts from women, never vice versa.

WTF:

What The Fuck.

Yakisoba:

Fried noodles, usually with pork or beef and some other stuff.

Yakitori:

Grilled pieces of chicken on a skewer.

Yak:

See yakuza.

Yakuza:

Every country has their own version of the mafia. The Yakuza are Japan's.

Yamasigawa-sensei:

My supervisor's assistant at the Saitama Board of Education.

Yorushiko onegaishimasu:

Sort of a catch-all polite phrase to use when asking someone to do something for you.

Yubinkyoku:

Post office.

Yukatta:

Traditional Japanese summer garment, similiar to a kimono but made of lighter cotton instead of silk. Still just as difficult to put on, though. Or so I'm told.

Yuki:

Snow.

Yuki Matsuri:

Thee Hokkaido Snow Festival. One of the biggest and most famous festivals in Japan. Kind of like the Québec Winter Carnival, but with more snow sculptures and less Bon Homme.