#by said older butch

[foldingfittedsheets]

Blessings on my house. I saw people today and sold an older butch a bed.

[harbingersecho]

florida man

[mahoutoons]

me reading oniisama e and finding out kaoru and henmi get together was like

[mr-weirdo-mcgee]

I wanna look like this when I say I'm a lesbian and make people utterly confused.

[tinystepsforward]

ngl it makes me want to die a little bit that it's so often trans people who feel that sex is mutable but oppression is always-forever based on asab in ways that allow them to demand that information from other trans people. like it feels fucking bad. it feels bad when it's people holding up someone who posts a lot of selfies as transition goals to a degree they have to clarify what they have or haven't done or what "direction" they're going in, it feels worse when people are out there like "caster semenya is not tma" or whatever the fuck. i am, as always, not a trans woman, but here's a sentiment echoed by many of the trans women around me who log the fuck off, quoted directly from one: "people who draw a clear line where they say that semenya or khelif are tme and then call me tma are just calling me male at this point".

like i get it. i really do. we seek community and shared experiences, and we feel betrayed when people have less in common with us than we thought they did. [*more on this later.] but that's not those people's faults and my god in the case i'm seeing play out on twitter rn this poor person did absolutely nothing to intentionally mislead people, just posted pictures of their actual kid self. who looks a lot like i did, because shockingly enough "we can always tell" doesn't fucking work for trans people either!

on the one hand i move in intersex circles which are unapologetically welcoming in cis "dyadic" people with pcos, because it serves nobody to draw a clear line where mutilation or genetics or some ineffable childhood suffering are what make somebody intersex, especially when most of us (esp in places like nz) have never been karyotyped and are being treated for symptoms without a pinned-down cause anyway. the more of us there are the stronger we are, the more pressure we can exert on a medical profession which doesn't like to consider how common outliers are, how uneasy sex is at all. and then on the other hand there's dyadic trans people on the internet who've yelled me out of spaces because a couple of traumatised incarcerated trans women i worked with as a prison abolitionist assumed i was also a trans woman and i didn't immediately tell them my entire csa-involved history of being sexed in varying ways as an infant and child and/or exactly how big my phallus was at birth or where in my junk config my urethra lives so they could decide i was tme or whatever.

returning to the * for a related but not identical thought: i think presuming shared experiences leads to some fucked shit in general! "oh we all had a radfem phase" or "oh we all were channers" no we fucking weren't and it's particularly obnoxious when me & mine are trying to build trans community locally to organise and resist the growing wave of far-right backlash against our existence, and there's just white people in there on a spectrum from "straight up being antisemitic and trying to get the n-word pass" through "handwringing about how they need to make space for people who aren't politically correct" to "handwringing about how brown people are right to be mad at them but doing shit fuckall". and then the other fucking brown people in the space are on some identity politics shit where they're like "trans joy inherently excludes those of us who could get deported" or "big city white queers are killing us by being visible instead of going stealth bc it stirs up the discourse" or whatever the fuck i've heard pulled out this year. there's a bunch of reasons i primarily organise outside of trans spaces and that's one of them. i've never felt more alone in spaces where people claim we're all the same than being left as the brownest moderator or organiser in a space full of people to whom "this is a safe trans space" apparently means they get to abdicate all other responsibilities not to lapse into presumed shared patterns that are fucking racist or otherwise alienating. i've never felt more alone than surrounded by exclusively trans people who sort people into boxes and assume everyone in those boxes has the transition goals they have. like i was on cypro until it disagreed with me to the point of endocrine crisis and now i'm on t and at both those points people were so fucking presumptive or entitled to my reasons or journey or personal relationship w my body

literally just submitted on (and was invited to consult on) the nz law commission's review of the human rights act and like. it's straight up fucked how many nz trans people fully do not comprehend that any "sex assigned at birth" type definitions fundamentally exclude migrants who have no way of proving it and many intersex people who happen to have been reassigned later or many times or never assigned at all as a baby. we can't make law with this shit and that's why we have to have symmetrical protections for all genders/sexes/expressions/presentations, bc naming and defining a protected class here often leaves the people who already are left out from those shared experiences of marginalisation out in the cold when they face violence

[skitskatdacat63]

I know it would literally never happen, but whenever the speculation of who the next James Bond will be comes up, I can only think about how I would sell my soul to get a butch lesbian James Bond 😣

[lesbovalentine]

woahg.. forgot this first panel was from fun home

[chemicalarospec]

One time when I was in 5th grade I wore a nice dress just because I wanted to and someone asked me if it was picture day and I never wore a skirt or dress again for three whole years. (They weren't teasing to be clear, they were just confused I think.) I still rarely wear skirts or dresses -- for one, putting on tights is more work than pants, but for a very long time I had a fear of being seen as "trying too hard" or something, which I still have but not so much towards skirts, those are less remarkable now. I'm not sure exactly what I'm trying to say by sharing this story but it's very formative for me.

[dykeogenes]

older butch lesbians, living happily as butch women, who say “if I were a kid now I would have been a trans man instead of a lesbian” are a whole lot closer to being trans— not ‘potentially’ trans, not ‘might have been’ trans, but really, actually, literally, trans, in their present lived experience, she/her and all— than they are to being transphobic. but I don’t think any of you are really ready for that conversation.

[geraskier]

im almost as uncomfortable in a suit as a dress but i could probably fuck with a skirt. like i could wear a tutu but the idea of putting on a tuxedo makes me dysphoric. slipping into masculinity isn't comforting i'd rather be an effeminate fey creature

[ichthysgospel]

do i shoot my shot with the trader joes employee right now.

[sweethydrogen]

The butch who works at the tractor supply near me opened up another register and grabbed me from the back of the line so I could buy my cat food

[toadsrbutch]

had an extremely pleasant time training the older butch who just joined our department from a different area of the lab 😌

[humanmaybe]

Hey ⚡️

[girldickdotcom]

is chloe price butch? greatest discussion thread in forum history, locked at 19,874 posts

[andreeds]

oh also haven't posted ant my gay club experience yet bc im so tired but it Slammed and Fucked there were five drag performers (one of the drag kings did a number to idkhow) there was a fun quiz abt sex (almost no one knew what sounding was?????) and i stayed up until 4am for the first time in years. overall i think i know where my paycheck is going to go