#but. I love me some slop

[i-wanna-show-you-off]

catch me liking all stars even though it’s objectively the worst total drama season

[birdemic]

thinking about media thats Bad in an impressive way and realized. theres a spectrum here

[soundleer]

friendly reminder!! human art—mii art, in this case—is infinitely better!!! 💜🫶✏

————

still ver:

[pasdetrois]

some nosferatu 2024 thoughts 🖤

this is the first jonathan (well, thomas in this adaptation because stoker estate lawsuit) that i have actually enjoyed watching—which was very much helped by his character not being shunted off to the corner after the castle arc, and by him being played by nicholas hoult instead of harry styles (yes, apparently he may have been the original casting choice. thank goodness for small miracles).

one of the few van helsings i've enjoyed watching as well. dafoe brought a compassionate earnestness to the role, which is an important element for setting him apart from a generic researcher/healer figure that would otherwise fade to the background (as the '79 version did for me, personally)

ellen being the lynchpin of this film from beginning to end—her loneliness, fear, desire, shame, defiance, and strength. (of course it's not ideal to blend mina and lucy into one character, because it does almost imply an interchangeability between them, but i can give some leeway here due to timing constraints.) there's an out of time and place aspect to her (she and others refer to her "fae" ways several times)—which is undeniably in part due to being a woman in a world like this, especially one who has experienced what she has and is offered only shame and silence for it—but also a fundamental Otherness that ends up becoming the salvatory key to a benediction only a few will ever know of... there was something touching about the doctor recognizing her power and how in their time it could offer everyone but her salvation. and while depp may not have quite the haunting presence adjani does, i still enjoyed her performance. the way she spoke of her wedding to death dream, caught between a laugh and a sob was so 🩶

the tragic pas de trois element of the story and the faustianesque covenants ellen and thomas enter into with the count were awful and fascinating and even poignant. this gluttonous, rotting corpse who can not love, but is the only one to hear ellen's pleas, who speaks to her through the conduit of her token of love to thomas, whose castle recognizes thomas and never willingly releases him. and thomas and ellen, standing together in the wreck, no longer talking past each other, for how little it matters now beyond these precious few moments. i'm still thinking about the harrowing scene in the third act where they simultaneously invoke and rebuke his spectre. "show him our love"!!!

beautiful visuals, when i could see them (unfortunately, it did occasionally suffer from the lighting problem that most of its horror contemporaries do, in that i probably resembled the squinting lady in pink trying to decipher what exactly was on the screen at times). the shadow work was sublime though (and i assume inspired by the '22 version). loved the shots where the count's fragmentary silhouette appears in billowing curtains or looms ever closer over thomas and ellen's wide eyed stares. significantly more evocative than the later scenes where we actually saw the count's physical form.

the visceral physicality of it all! lots of blood and sharp, staccato contortions lending a presence and urgency to the scenes.

harding's character didn't really work for me (there was just a bit too much of the cliche, especially with some of the trite landed gentryman dialogue™️), but i can appreciate that he and his family were likely intended to be the Victorian Ideal foil to thomas and ellen, and the cost that ultimately incurred. and to be honest, the coffin scene was still more poignant than the equivalent in fennell's 2023 attempt at gothic horror.

the film mostly follows its predecessors and the novel with regard to the treatment of the villagers. not ideal, to say the least, but from a straight adaptation position, you're in a tricky spot given how much the "fear of the uncivilized, foreign invader" bigotry is baked into the text itself. it likely wasn't egger's priority, given how short this chapter was in the film, but i feel there's more that could have been done here.

lovely string work in the soundtrack, especially the pendulum swing between a sense of poignancy and foreboding. these were a couple of my favorite tracks:

[bucket-puns]

Knight Zwei West Ishmael on- your house actually, pay up.

[commsroom]

it is a little funny to me that zach valenti is a vegetarian and seems generally health conscious, considering that doug eiffel is... not that. the opposite of that, even. eiffel would say french fries should count as a vegetable. eiffel thinks ham & pineapple pizza covers all necessary food groups. eiffel has a meat & carbs & grease based diet, sustained by a quick metabolism and an iron stomach. and he is like aggressively american; eiffel is the guy they make novelty fast food items for. there is nothing in this world he wants more than a burger that is also a pizza. doritos® locos tacos and baja blast. that radioactive looking flamin' hot cheetos mac and cheese? he would eat that. no question. that guy loves koolaid flavors that don't even resemble artificial fruit.

[redgemwink]

i kinda don't care about fire emblem at all anymore,,

[primrosebow]

GNAWING AT THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE RN HOLY

That drawing was my dinner for tonight😋

Well anon. I'm back in town and I am letting you out of your enclosure to have an absolute rampage on unsuspecting pedestrians.

So much more slop to come

[medicinemane]

There are zero movies I'm hearing about that I want right now

No, I don't want yet another remake

No, I don't want liveaction for something that should have been animated... and... also should suck less

Could (one) of these things be good? Maybe, people often put a lot of work and soul into making something even if the idea is a soulless cash grab by studio execs... but I just don't want it and I'm not even gonna look

I'm just tired of remakes and making shows and movies based off random shit like videogames... nah, fuck you, I can just watch the original movie... I can just do anything other than watch your movie

[i-c-u-p]

going to start using this platform like twitter again and by that i mean posting relentlessly and going on rants in the tags

[prolibytherium]

I get sooooooooo fucking bored of flowery prose sometimes, like it has its place but I see so much online writing where it feels like every sentence is a calculated attempt at making it big in a webweaving post.

[skeletalheartattack]

If you were a chulip character how would players kiss you?

find and present to me a working copy of Dragon Ball Z Budokai 1 for the PlayStation 2 and you can kiss my stupid ass

[woodnrust]

Autism memory when I was little my family used to think I was a picky eater because none of my foods could touch and whatever but it was actually just me not liking the mixes of flavour and texture but nowadays the picky eater title has been revoked because my family said, and I quote, "some of the stuff you eat I wouldn't even put in pig slop"

[gentleoverdrive]

[June/2 of 3] One Who Doesn't Care is One Who Shouldn't Be.

Fuck Chuck Wendig. No, it's not just because of what his pathetic whinging did for the Internet Archive (though fuck him for that as well; what a tremendous shithead move it was). Fuck Chuck Wendig on the principle that he, like Ernest Cline, Aaron Sorkin and other similar cretins have gotten too comfortable in the shrines that nerds from different walks of life have built for them. --- I dislike having to channel Bill Hicks or some other purveyor of this line of thinking who has spit this familiar kind of bile when ranting and raving about dumb shit, but when oh WHEN did the internet agreed that it was kosher to elevate these mediocre, no-talent hacks into positions of reverence within pop culture? --- We already have to deal with worthless shysters in positions of Political, Intellectual, Governmental, Financial and Academic Power... why, in the name of all that is fuck, do we have to do it for our Entertainment as well? --- If you're reading this, you're already likely having to deal with circumstances where sometimes you just want to sit in front of the TV, computer or mobile device at the end of the day and just... not think about everything that transpired. I get it. But also don't fucking settle for elevating things that are the entertainment equivalent of slop! You already have to compromise on a ton of things. --- Don't compromise on the things that spark joy within you, especially if you already have to deal with a buncha other unfun shit on your every day. Treat yourself, but also respect yourself enough to go for something that will actually put a skip in your step and a smile in your lips. Read ya' later ladies, fellas and NB's!

[kalashnikovlobotomy]

rip america sorry that you were born american. you would've loved listening to saint tropez and saying coaie (literally "balls" but we use it as "bro". simultaneously very disrespectful and very cordial.)

[medicinemane]

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