#but you guys realize they're still evil

[fiannalover]

Y'all realize that the entire thing still happened because Pecharunt mind controlled the old couple that loved them and already spared nothing in caring for them, right? You realize this is still Pecharunt's fault, right? Y'all realize they still mind controlled their parents, three pokémon, robbed and killed a man, and the fact they did so because they wanted more love and affection means they're still a villain, but one that is moved by a youkai lack of morality as we know it in the first place, right? Right?

[hooffuloftootsierolls]

I love you Stella

God, she’s cunt, bitch, and brat all rolled into one. I’m obsessed with her. Stella Goetia they could never make me hate you.

[genderqueerdykes]

it actually blows my mind that tons of queer people seriously think that viewing women as inherently weak, scared, pathetic, incapable of holding power, and defenseless is feminist and progressive. how on god's green earth does it empower women at all to tell other women that they're just inherently weaker than men, need to be scared of men, that no matter what women can't hurt or abuse them, are always prey and never predators, have no autonomy, that women are literally incapable of holding positions of power over others, that women who abuse others are just "traumatized by patriarchy," or any of this nonsense?

this is misogyny for the sake of making men look bad. that's not empowering at all. regardless of the "men evil woman good" narrative you're trying to spin, it's still reinforcing that women are weak, pathetic, stupid, defenseless babies who can't ever do harm or protect themselves. the reason for reinforcing it does not matter: it's still misogyny. you are still acting with hatred for women. you still have patriarchal views of womanhood you need to abandon. how is telling women that they're inherently weaker than men progressive?

how is any of this feminist? this is literally just misogyny. you can't take misogyny and slap a new coat of paint on it and call it progressive. if you think this way, you have been suckered into hating women whether or not you realize it. you can't blame every shitty thing a woman does on trauma from cisheteronormative patriarchy. you're removing the autonomy from womanhood altogether. what you're saying is that women aren't responsible for their actions because they're too scared and and can't think critically because of how "scared" they are. what, you think women just can't take accountability because we're too dumb and pathetic and useless...? because that's what it sounds like.

you're telling women we're brainless and shouldn't think for themselves. stop calling yourself progressive if you promote the idea that women shouldn't think for themselves, but rather listen to you, instead, to make their decisions for them. stop proudly being a misogynist for the sake of trying to make men look bad. telling women that they're too stupid to be able to tell a genuine threat from a guy just standing there is misogynistic as fuck. this isn't liberating women. it's not liberating ANYONE

[anghraine]

It's interesting (if often frustrating) to see the renewed Orc Discourse after the last few episodes of ROP. I've seen arguments that orcs have to be personifications of evil rather than people as such or else the ethics of our heroes' approach to them becomes much more fraught. Tolkien's work, as written, seems an odd choice to me for not wrangling with difficult questions, and of course, more diehard fans are going to immediately bring up Shagrat and Gorbag.

If you haven't read LOTR recently, Shagrat and Gorbag are two orcs who briefly have a conversation about how they're being screwed over by Sauron but have no other real options, about their opinions of mistakes that have been made, that they think Sauron himself has made one, but it's not safe to discuss because Sauron has spies in their own ranks. They reminisce about better times when they had more freedom and fantasize about a future when they can go elsewhere and set up a small-scale banditry operation rather than being involved in this huge-scale war. Eventually, however, they end up turning on each other.

Basically any time that someone brings up the "humanity" of this conversation, someone else will point out that they're still bad people. They're not at all guilty about what they're part of. They just resent the dangers to themselves, the pressure from above, failures of competence, the surveillance they're under, and their lack of realistic alternative options. The dream of another life mentioned in the conversation is still one of preying on innocent people, just on a much smaller and more immediate scale, etc.

I think this misses the reason it keeps getting brought up, though. The point is not that Shagrat and Gorbag are good people. The point is that they are people.

There's something very normal and recognizable about their resentment of their superiors, their fears of reprisal and betrayal that ultimately are realized, their dislike of this kind of industrial war machine that erases their individual work and contributions, the tinge of wistfulness in their hope of escape into a different kind of life. Their dialect is deliberately "common"—and there's a lot more to say about that and the fact that it's another commoner, Sam, who outwits them—but one of the main effects is to make them sound familiar and ordinary. And it's interesting that one of the points they specifically raise is that they're not going to get better treatment from "the good guys" so they can't defect, either.

This is self-interested, yes, but it's not the self-interest of some mystical being or spirit or whatnot, but of people.

Tolkien's later remarks tend to back this up. He said that female orcs do exist, but are rarely seen in the story because the characters only interact with the all-male warrior class of orcs. Whatever female orcs "do," it isn't going to war. Maybe they do a lot of the agricultural work that is apparently happening in distant parts of Mordor, maybe they are chiefly responsible for young orcs, maybe both and/or something else, we don't know. But we know they're out there and we know that they reproduce sexually and we know that they're not part of the orcish warrior class.

Regardless of all the problems with this, the idea that orcs have a gender-restricted warrior class at all and we're just not seeing any of their other classes because of where the story is set doesn't sound like automatons of evil. It sounds like an actual culture of people that we only see along the fringes.

And this whole matter of "but if they're people, we have to think about ethics, so they can't be people" is a weird circular argument that cannot account for what's in LOTR or for much of what Tolkien said afterwards. Yes, he struggled with The Problem of Orcs and how to reconcile it with his world building and his ethical system, but "maybe they're not people" is ultimately not a workable solution as far as LOTR goes and can't even account for much of the later evolution of his ideas, including explicit statements in his letters.

And in the end, the real response that comes to mind to that circular argument is "maybe you should think about ethics more."

[livwritessometimes]

At Least One Of Us Got Our Happy Ending

: Part 15 (Lando's Version)

: Spring Fling is finally here…that’s a good thing right?

: Prev | Next

: Series Masterlist

: Main Masterlist

: Author's Note - You can refer to Interesting *Cue Evil Laugh* to get the context for a certain part.

…

As Y/n and Lando watched Oscar pull his girl in for a kiss, she couldn't help but join some of their friends in hooting for the new couple. It was nice to see Oscar finally be with the girl he'd madly been head-over-heels for—Y/n could recall countless conversations they'd had about this. Smiling at the scene, she felt Lando pull her close to him, his hand resting on her waist.

"Should we get back to the table?" Asked Lando

Looking away from the scene in front of her, Y/n nodded at him and started leading him to their table.

There sat Max, one of Lando's friends who he constantly played games with, and his date.

Taking a seat, Y/n said, "It's so nice to see Oscar finally be happy."

"It is! I'm glad he came today," Lando said, looking at Oscar.

Max laughed to himself, leaning back against the chair he said, "I guess it's nice when things work out the way they're supposed to, huh?" He said, looking at Lando.

Lando narrowed his eyes at Max, "Max..." He said in a warning tone.

Confused by the exchange Y/n asked, "Wait, what's that supposed to mean?"

Max shrugged casually, taking a sip from the flask he had snuck in, "Oh, it's just funny how it all started you know? I just didn't think you guys would actually make it," Max finished.

Lando could feel his heart beating faster, "Max," He said again this time with hint of anger.

Y/n couldn't help but tense up, looking between Lando and Max. "What does he mean by 'How it started' Lando?" She asked.

"Oh nothing, you know how I am, I love to talk nonsense," Max said realizing that he might have said a little too much.

"Lando...What does he mean by that?" Y/n asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Lando sighed deeply, his mind racing as he tried to find the right words. He felt angry—angry at Max for opening his mouth when it was not needed, angry at himself for agreeing to do such a stupid thing.

"Y/n..." He started, his voice hesitant. Reaching out for her hand, he said, "It wasn't supposed to mean anything...I had no idea that I would actually fall in love..." He said. He could see the dread wash over Y/n's eyes.

*flashback*

*present*

Y/n felt her heart shatter into a million pieces. All hope and dreams for an amazing night disappeared in an instant. She sat there in silence as she let Lando's words sink in.

"So I was just a 'Dare'?" She asked, still in disbelief.

Lando avoided her gaze, his throat feeling dry. "I—I never imagined that it would turn into this," He said. "At first, it was just a stupid dare, I was just angry about the complaint, but I never thought that..." Lando's voice trailed off. He was not sure what he could say or do to make any of it sound better.

Y/n could feel her eyes sting with tears, "So does that mean all this time, every single conversation we've had, every single moment we've spent together...It was all just a game to you?" Y/n said as tears trickled down her face.

"No!," Lando said suddenly, a little too loud for his liking. He tried to reach out for her hand, but she pulled away, "I didn't mean for it to be like that. It was just a dare at the start, I admit, but the more time I spent with you, the more I realized that I just couldn't continue. I was going to tell you, I swear Y/n," Lando said. "I just didn't know how...." He trailed off again.

"So if you hadn't "fallen in love" with me, would you have still gone through with your plan?" Y/n asked, her voice a mixture of anger and hurt.

Lando opened his mouth but no words came out. He didn't have an answer. Deep down, he knew that no answer would make things right. The damage had already been done.

Y/n stood up abruptly, her chair scraping loudly against the floor. "Congrats!" She spat, her voice filled with bitterness. "You've won your stupid dare. I really hope it was worth it Lando," she said as she started walking towards the exit.

"Y/n please wait!" Lando pleaded.

"NO!" Y/n said, finally letting go of the emotions she had been holding onto till now. "Don't you dare follow me. You've lost the right to do that," she said, her voice cracking at the end.

And with that, she made her way out of the hall, taking Lando's heart with every step she took.

…

Tags: @regalbanshee | @be-your-coffee-pot | @mrsbrxkkxr | @princessria127 | @moonraysandstars | @prettiest-at-the-party | @theblueblub | @magixpracticality | @slytherinholland | @overlyexcitedoutlaw | @marvel-at-stucky | @crumbssss | @a-beaverhausen | @felicityforyou | @gigigreens | @jas0nluvr | @khaylin27 | @imsiriuslyreal | @cwiphswmwasohmm | @wobblymug | @e-nonsense | @raizelchrysanderoctavius | @papaya-twinks | @vintagefucksstuff | @st4rg1rln | @redstappen | @iamred-iamyellow | @tashisgf | @ghost-of-student-sufferings | @saachiep81 | @lozzamez3 | @ravisinghs-wife | @elizamoe133 | @anthonylockwoodandco111 | @formulaal | @luvsforme | @annabellelee | @a-disturbing-self-reflection | @emryb | @grovelingmen | @illicit-affcirs | @iwilleatyourgod | @youre-on-your-ownkid | @originaldreamerdragon | @landorris | @mountvesuvu | @chezmardybum | @littlegrapejuice | @spitesfvl-blog | @juleshadalittlelamb | @vicurious28 | @niyu2208 |

[star--stilinski]

i need some much stiles

much stiles, much happy! jk, i understand ya. i just love making fun of typos because i'm actually evil.

☆

stiles is insatiable.

seriously, no matter how much you squirm and whine, he won't fucking quit. you started this, though. you suppose it might be warranted.

of course, your "starting it" was all in compassion. when he first asked (a husky mumble in your ear as he tugged at the waistband of your sweats), you had told him he'd be disappointed. that only certain guys really actually like it. that you haven't shaved, aren't pornstar pretty, your thighs might actually crush him.

and he took that very personally.

told you that "any real man knows getting crushed by thighs like yours while tasting your orgasm is the real way to end their evening" and went even further to say that "if you seriously expect me to be attracted to that child-looking shit then you're sorely mistaken." he then proceeded to lay you back and get comfy between your legs.

you didn't realize the monster you'd create.

he moaned when he first tasted you, after ample "warm up" (his words, not yours) and a good amount of ogling your up-close sex. his movements started off unsure and a bit sloppy, before he found his rhythm and got confident. from there, he was bringing you close and then pulling you back a few times, just for the fucking fun of it. it was the most torturous pleasure you'd ever felt.

after the first orgasm (where you unconsciously thanked him over and over, which unlocked a new kink for him. yippee.), your back arched slightly and your lips parted in a moan, you expected that to be it. the end. maybe a hand job for his fantastic work and then knocking out after a shower.

instead, stiles didn't even let up.

his eyes are closed, humming against your clit as he holds you by the thighs. partly because, well, stiles loves your thighs. and partly because he has to keep you still.

overstimulation hurts so good. you tug at his hair, gasping "stiles, it hurts, please," and he relents. but he only pulls back a bit, giving you a moment of relief as he licks his lips with hooded eyes trained on you.

"you okay, baby?" his words seem to bleed into one another, hands squeezing your plush thighs like he's holding himself back. the sight it downright evil, really; you've already forgotten how it hurt for him to keep going.

your head falls back onto your pillows and you scrunch your features up. "you don't have to-"

"please, i want to, please." his tone takes a rapid uptick into begging territory. "only a little longer, promise i'll be good, make you feel so good. just a bit more, yeah?"

you lift your head, tired and breathless, to meet his eyes. they're unfocused as he flicks his attention between you and your sex. letting your head rest back on the cushions, you take a deep breath and nod once. "alright, just a little longer."

"thank you, fuck. thank you so much baby." stiles litters kisses all over the insides of your thighs, his own way of showing gratitude before he dives back in, eyelashes notably fluttering when he takes a taste of you again.

he's not very kind after that.

round two, then three, and by the fourth- your jaw is slack and your brow is pinched together, but you're not sure if the expression is from pleasure or pain. when you come, actual tears prick at your eyes. stiles' tongue flicks your sensitive clit, working you over the edge, as you babble nonsense in your haze. this orgasm peaks with it's own bundle of pain involved, and your nerves seem to be getting the two mixed up as your hips attempt to twitch, held in place by stiles' big, demanding hands.

"tastes so good, mhmm, been thinking about this forever," stiles' words are barely audible as he looks up at you. his face is glistening, basically from nose to chin, and he's totally pussy drunk. you've never believed that expression until you see it in stiles' hooded eyes, head resting against your thigh. his cheeks are completely flushed and his hands are massaging your hips with more pressure than necessary, probably not even aware of the motion since his own hips are lazily grinding into the mattress.

you let out a heavy breath and smooth your fingers over his hair to try and fix what you did when you were preoccupied. it doesn't help the tameless mess he's sporting, but the look kinda suits him. "so?"

he blinks slowly, smiling up at you like you're the one who looks completely in love. well, you're four orgasms deep and stiles looks so pretty in between your thighs, so... maybe you do look like that. he licks his lips, and it makes goosebumps rise on your skin. "so, what?"

"d-did- are you disappointed?" the question sounds stupid now that it's out of your mouth, but he's too far gone to even laugh at you.

"jesus, no. could do this all day if you'd let me." his brow furrows. "would you let me?"

you laugh breathlessly and let your head fall against the pillows, scratching his scalp lightly. "i dunno. maybe." tugging him by the hair (which causes a sudden buck of his hips where they're grinding. go figure) you mumble, "c'mere?"

he crawls over you, wiping his face off on the way, and collapses while pressing his face into your neck. "yeah? what're you thinking about?"

you breathe in his scent, mind filled with stilesstilesstilesstilesstiles. "you. what are you thinking about?"

his arms wrap around you comfortably. "you."

"you can't have the same answer." your voice is weaker with his body weight on you. "that's cheating."

"alright, fine. i'm thinking about eating you out again."

"jesus, stiles." you feel him smile against your neck, and his arms tighten around you.

"what? i'm hungry!"

"it's not a- god, i've made a monster!" you laugh and cover your eyes, feeling him lift himself halfway off of you. "this is going to be the death of me."

"correction," his voice lowers, and you feel him planting kisses down your neck, then your chest. as he gets to your stomach, you peek through your fingers to find him assuming his previous position.

"i'm going to be the death of you."

☆

yayyy i'm posting while in a slump!!!!!!!! yayyy i'm not a total failure!!!!!!!!!!! (sobs heard in the distance)

sorry this is my worst ever creation look at this ugly FREAK

[teaboot]

Do you think that cis men feel the same way as trans men do? Like with how men get treated by society as being inherently evil and as predators?

I think maybe both cis and trans men experience these issues but it's easier for a trans guy to point it out because he gets to see people so quickly turn on him for being a man while transitioning

oh yeah definitely

I find "meninists" fucking obnoxious, especially as any of their VALID concerns fall under the bracket of feminism, but there does exist a presence of radfems and terfs that are scarily eager to lash out at anything resembling masculine that. Definitely needs to be addressed somehow

Like. There's a mile of middle ground between "Um yeah women have problems, whatever, but what about ME and MY FEELINGS 😢" and "I am genuinely trying my best to be thoughtful and considerate of others, and everything I do is being met with bad-faith interpretations and dismissal"

And I think the best advice I have for anyone else getting bogged down by this is that. like.

If someone is determined to see the worst in you, nothing you can do to prove otherwise will be enough. You will never change that person's mind. They don't want you to change their mind. So like... just focus on you, and keep doing your best, and learn, and know that people determined to find something nasty don't really have an issue with YOU- they have their own experiences and traumas coloring their worldview.

Someone who is determined to see you as a monster will only ever see a monster. So it's better to ask yourself, "would a monster do what I'm doing?". If the answer is yes, take steps to change that. If the answer is no, then it's not about you, and you can give yourself permission to move on.

So... yeah, I imagine cis men probably do feel the way I feel about this sorta thing sometimes.

Except, like. After a lifetime being a girl, living as a girl, fighting for equality as the only girl in a lot of men's spaces, being a feminist girl and an Eldest Daughter girl and calling out the bullshit only to later realize I'm not a girl... and that Im actually mostly a dude, still a feminist... at least when people call me a mysoginist, I know they're talking out their ass

I can kinda see where young men encounter their very first radfems calling themselves feminists and immediately become radicalized right-wing conservatives cause like. If I as a teen thought feminism meant Radfems and Terfs, I'd probably start running too

It's all just so exhausting

Any one group being wholesale grouped as "100% helpless gentle victim" or "100% selfish malevolent monster" is doomed, imo

(Now watch the notes blow up with "this is just 'not all men' rhetoric, lol)

But anyways I hate nuance I hate interpretation I hate implication and symbolism and context and I wish everything in the world was simpler so we could all blow a collective joint together and invent some new soups

[transmcytshowdown]

Rue:

Submitted for: Skyblock Kingdoms

Headcanons: Identity not specified, pronouns not specified

Propaganda: “Her whole character arc is a metaphor for being trans! She realized she wasn't who she was told she was and then chose her own name and made friends who saw her as HER! They're so special and wonderful and transgender!!”

“[The submitter] LITERALLY INCLUDED HER IN A PAPER [they] WROTE BECAUSE SHE IS SO TRANS.”

“Rue is not just textually trans, with she/they pronouns, she is ALSO a trans allegory! That's TWO trans aspects!”

“Rue is LITERALLY a trans allegory! They have a whole arc about realizing people are viewing them as the wrong person, creating a new identity, being hurt by that confusion, being lied to and told they need to act a certain way for people to like them.... THEYRE A CLONE OF A GUY WHO USES ALL PRONOUNS. THEY USE SHE/THEY PRONOUNS! THEY WERE TRAGICALLY KILLED BY THEIR ORIGINAL'S WIFE (possessed) AND DESERVE A WIN!!”

“Rue is not just played by a trans person and a trans allegory, but a canonical trans character, and she deserves all the love in this world. Rue means a lot to [the submitter] as a whole, and her discovery of how she could be her own person without having to be who people expected her to be made [them] want to sob loudly.”

BigBSt4tz2:

Submitted for: Evo SMP, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life

Headcanons: Trans man, he/they

Propaganda: “The vibe. They're so trans man coded. Like he would use a binder in the life series and, like, for example, Pearl would help him with it in Limited life, or Ren would help them cut their hair in Double life if he felt like being less gender ✨ He's just so trans man 😩 VOTE BIGB.”

“HE CAN BE ANY GENDER YOU'D WANT DUE TO CREATIVITY. I'VE SEEN MANY MAKE BIGB TRANSFEM OR NONBINARY!!!! YOU CAN EVEN MAKE HIM XENOGENDER OR USE NEOPRONOUNS FOR FUN.“

“C!Bigb being trans is so important. His character is very ambiguous (to [the submitter]. At least.) due to the hidden secretive nature of himself, he hides the lies, he masks his weirdness sometimes [which] can be a metaphor for a trans person not wanting to come out (also autism)((proof is [they’re] trans and autistic and [they] do this stuff)). You can color pick a makeshift trans flag from his mc skin also.”

“Every (Life) series, he changes up a lot of himself for whatever he's doing. This seems like he can't decide what exactly he is and is trying to rebrand himself as a different type of person every time, which tends to be something [the submitter has] noticed in a few trans people. The lack of clarity of who they are is definitely very genderfluid coded. It could also go for his character throughout the life series being a system, with each new series being someone else. [Their] main evidence for this is Terry (from Last Life). It can also go for being transmasc on some level because of how easy it was for him to be that character!”

“BigB's username literally has t4t in it. He's not cis [the submitter’s] sorry.”

“BigB deserves to go all the way to the end of this poll because the primary life series fandom's somewhat casual disregard of him makes [the submitter] so upset, and all the trans headcanons for him fill [them] with infinite joy <3 It's gotten a lot better over the years, but [they] feel he still deserves so much more recognition for all his good work.”

“No person who makes their base the backrooms deserves to be cis. That gas lighting with the hole could easily also be about gender.

Grian: What's your gender? 

BigB: Oh, like pretty masc.

(Five seconds later)

Scar: So, like, what's your gender, BigB? 

BigB: None. 

Grian: ??????”

Ethoslab:

Submitted for: Hermitcraft, Third Life, Last Life, Double Life, Limited Life, Secret Life, Wild Life

Headcanons: Agender, they/them; Transfem, she/her; Nonbinary, he/they/she; Nonbinary, they/he/it; Identity not specified, ladder/ladderself

Propaganda: “[The submitter] just think[s] she deserves boobies. [They] think they would be good for her. And also it's because [they] understand the way the universe flows and the nature of all things.”

“[Quote from Etho:]‘I’m ice man also, also the ice Queen […] yep, yep both in one.’ Etho has compared himself to a pretty girl before. ‘That’s me on the inside, beautiful, but on the outside it’s just this.’ (He’s talking about Falsesymmetry’s hermit head, a female head). Bigender, genderfluid, or genderqueer Etho trust trust trust.”

“T4T cletho. They’re both nonbinary and divorced (in an active relationship) and take turns on who's the ex wife and who's the ex husband.”

“When [the submitter] first joined hermitblr, [they were] genuinely confused about Etho’s gender for a bit because of the sheer amount of people on here that she/her him. [They] love it. Live your dreams.”

“Etho (ftm) but can be feminine. [The submitter] think[s] his vest is equal to the famous oversized trans hoodie (but with style).”

Evil Xisuma:

Submitted for: Hermitcraft

Headcanons: Transmasc Demi-boy, he/they

Propaganda: Canonically uses he/they

“Their voice is deepened by a voice changer, even though they wear the same helmet as Xisuma, which could hint at them purposefully adding a voice changer in order to have a deeper voice.”

“Evil Xisuma bites you if you misgender them (They also bite you if you properly gender them) (They bite).”

[marlshroom]

came to the fucked up realization after finishing gravity falls again last night the parallels of the dream bubble bill made for mabel and the literal state of delusion he keeps himself in.

in the book of bill on the page where bill cipher describes how he figured out a way to manipulate her into giving him the rift, it says:

"Summers ending, my guy. Ending to death, bro. She'd do anything to make it last just a day longer. Probably something RASH and OUT OF CHARACTER, even!"

as we know, mabel cannot handle the fact that she will be growing up. that the relationship with her brother is going to change. she is scared of high school.

bill then says "That was it. She'd never make a deal with me. But she'd make a deal with someone she believed could give her more time. The dream was done. I had her."

bill then creates the dream bubble for mabel, he makes every one of her dreams come true, a place where time is still and she can be a kid forever. a lie so great that she wont have to face the truth.

in journal 3 on one of the pages bill is writing in code, we see this:

[ID: "I ask you, why must[should] time only move forward? Why must cause preceded effect. Who voted on the law of physics."]

my friend helped me break down what bill means by this:

why can we only move forward in the 4th dimension of time. why does something have to make another thing happen, why must cause come before the effect. why cant you move backwards, in the other direction, change the decisions youve made.

how interpret this is bill asking why he is not able to back and stop what he did to his family. he says to ford that he tried and failed to undo the past.** why did him wanting people to acknowledge his advantages instead of suppress him lead to the destruction of his whole dimension?

**(i just want to point out that this is probably the time where bill is the MOST open to anybody, or at least the first. to his henchmaniacs he had been telling them that he liberated his dimension until the oracle discovered the truth. here, to ford, he got so much closer to telling the truth. he SHOWS ford the last atoms of his world. he says that it was destroyed by a monster, not that it was liberated! destroyed)

back to when bill says "I had her" about mabel, he had her cause he knew exactly what needed to happen to trap mabel in a delusion because it is exactly what he is doing to himself. creating a fake narrative of what happened to him, that he was vindicated in killing his whole dimension. only ever doing exactly what he wants because confronting the truth is too scary for him(good fucking lord). the morality page offers good insight into this too.

i am actually just going to quote the whole page and highlight the important part. it speaks for itself really

"THE POINT IS it's[morality] is a very flexible concept! But parents and presidents don't want you to know that, because then you might start asking other questions, like who put them in charge, anyway? So they cram your brain full of guilt and regrets for transgressing the laws that they just made up(the laws that they made to prevent the destruction of their dimension, regardless of if the law + the wrongful medication of a fucking baby triangle did any good to actually prevent it). Wouldn't it be nice if you could put all that baggage down? Quell the shame that follows you everywhere for a lifetime of crimes? MAKE THE SCREAMS FINALLY STOP? The good news is you CAN silence that annoying voice, and here's how!

DENIAL

Works 100% of the time in every situation. What you you mean there are people who disagree? I can confidently say there aren't!

RATIONALIZATION

If you can do it, you can justify it! "Truth" is open-source code and anyone can edit it anytime! Want to be like me? List 3 "evil" things and then 3 "reasons why they're actually good." You'll be rationalizing like Bill in no time!

DETACHMENT

Did you know 100% of your human cells die and are replaced every 7 years? That means that anything you did 7 years ago wasn't even you-it was some dead loser! You can't be held accountable for what a dead person did! What? You think this is just another form of rationalization? I DENY THAT!

THE BILL CIPHER DECISION METHOD!

Working over the eons, the voices in my head teamed up and worked out a foolproof method for making any decision in any situation.

DO WHATEVER I WANT."

ooooooooooooooooooh boy.

he is fully admitting here that he is living in a completely different really in order to justify doing whatever he wants. he gives mabel the tools to deny, to rationalize, to detach herself from the reality of it all. that time has to move forward. and he thinks it will work because it worked on himself.

but it doesn't work on mabel because she understands that she needs other people. shes vunerable, she lets people in, admits when shes wrong. and bill cant do that because it would destroy the fantasy he's created for himself.

[hannieehaee]

18+ / mdi

content: perv!wonwoo, established relationship, afab reader, smut, fingering, oral (f receiving), dry humping, penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 2215

a/n: u can assume this is pt. 2 to this or just read on its own. they're not rlly connected at all but same premise 😭

masterlist

being wonwoo's girlfriend was quite an experience. when you'd first met the boy, - courtesy of an introduction through your mutual friend kim mingyu - he had seemed like an absolute gentleman. he was even a little more shy and reserved than most other guys, something you had found adorable during your first few dates. the shy looks and touches at the beginning of the relationship made your heart soar, but they didnt last too long. it wasnt until the relationship got a bit more serious that you got to know the real wonwoo.

although he still treated you like absolute royalty in every aspect possible, providing everything you could ever need and granting every wish you could even imagine, you hadn't realized how much of a pervert your boyfriend truly was until a few weeks into the relationship.

it wasnt like it was a huge issue. and its not like you were against his very obvious obsession with touching you, no. you welcomed it, even. who would be against the constant touch of a jeon wonwoo? denying him would feel like insanity for you, but it could sometimes get in the way of things.

it had just been getting out of hand as of late. you were on a call? too bad, he's rubbing his fingers on your pussy. need to wash dishes? he's eating your pussy from behind. gotta shower? he's stepping in and fucking you against the wall. you need to leave early in the morning? he's holding you back and fucking you into the mattress. your body was bruised and sore (in all the best ways possible) because he just could not be around you without dragging orgasm after orgasm out of you. it was pure, never ending pleasure, but it came with never ending interruptions in your every day life.

like now, as you tried to innocently watch a movie with your boyfriend. you knew it was coming, but you still allowed yourself to be caught off guard when wonwoo slowly scooted closer and closer until he was able to sneak his hand into your loose pajama shorts. without even saying anything, he began to rub at you, causing you to lose focus on what was playing on screen, eyes becoming heavy.

"nonu ... the movie," you whined half-heartedly, still wanting to watch the movie but also enjoying his soft touches too much to actually attempt to push him away.

"shh, baby. keep watching the movie," he kept rubbing at you, getting you wetter and wetter by the second, up until he determined you were wet enough for him to slip his fingers in, getting you to whine his name in the way he loved. your eyes closed as his fingers toyed with you, hitting all your favorite spots as you became putty under his hands.

"didn't you wanna watch the movie, baby? what happened? open your eyes for me," he was evil when he got like this. your pleasure was his only focus, but he would only give it to you under his own terms.

you attempted to open your eyes, but your body was working against you, causing you to writhe desperately at the way his thumb had moved up to softly toy with your clit while his pointer and middle finger pistoned in and out of you at a speed your body couldn't process.

"nonu! nonu, please, fuck ..." the high pitch of your voice gave you away without having to warn him of your impending orgasm. he knew all your tells by now, being fully aware that just a few more seconds and he'd have his fingers drenched by you.

"c-cumming! non-u!"

he removed his fingers from you, not bothering to wipe them before slipping them in your mouth without warning. "tasty. right, baby?", he chuckled to himself at your surprised yelp at the sudden intrusion in your mouth.

he snuck his hand right back in your shorts and gathered a bit more of your essence to stick in his own mouth, humming at the taste, "yeah, so fucking good," he scooted to your side, cuddling against you as you still caught your breath before pointing at the movie still playing on screen, "thank you, baby. now tell me what i missed?"

~

you were running a bit late today. you had stayed up late with wonwoo last night, doing things you were too ashamed to say out loud. so you weren't too surprised when you'd woken up and realized you had missed your usual alarm due to your heavy sleep. but it was fine! if you rushed, you could still get ready quickly enough to arrive at a respectable time. the only issue was, you were still buried against wonwoo's chest, strong arms wrapped around you as you felt him press himself up against you. you were pretty sure he was still sleeping, yet not surprised at realizing he was horny even in his sleep.

"nonu? are you asleep?", you attempted to peek at him from your angle, but only catching sight of a fluffy head of hair resting against your back.

he simply groaned in response, snuggling impossibly closer to you, causing you to feel him even more.

"wonwoo, i need to go ..."

"no you dont," he powered through half a sentence even in his sleepy state, "you still got time, don't you baby?"

"im gonna be late, nonu."

he began to unwrap himself from you, making you believe he was moving aside so that you could get up, except he had only disconnected from you so that he could get a better angle to begin to hover his body over yours.

"you have time, though. right, baby? just need five minutes," he mumbled as he began to press kisses to your neck.

your body betrayed you yet again, as you tilted your head to the side to give him more room to kiss on you, "i ... nonu, i'm already late," you left your arms limp on your sides, trying to not indulge on the man above you, but he kept instigating you with his touches.

"don't worry, hmm? ill be quick. you wont be late. promise."

you knew this to be a lie, but the moment he started grinding his hips against yours, you were gone. there was no longer any room for rational thinking in your now-empty head. your arms had now admitted defeat in pretending not to want to seek his touch, now lifting up to grab at his back as he canted his hips down. it was all very soft and slow, very much unlike wonwoo, but you couldnt blame him considering last night's events, when he'd quite literally fucked you into the mattress until the late hours of the night.

he seemed to grow tired of the mere friction after a few minutes, preferring to find your warmth instead. there was no need to undress, since you'd both remained in your nude forms from last night. he slipped in with no problem, groaning out your name into your ear at the feeling. he expressed his pleasure in a wide array of expletives against your ear, breath warm and heavy.

"you're always so tight, baby. so perfect for me."

"cant be away from this pussy for too long or i go insane. but you know that, dont you, baby?"

"driving me fucking insane, shit. pressing up against me all night. thinking i wont just fuck you into the mattress all over again."

"gonna keep this pussy here all day. gonna make sure you can't make it out of bed, baby. would you like that?"

his words had you feeling lightheaded, scratching your nails along the length of his back as he eventually sped up, clearly in search of his climax. wonwoo was always a little extra sensitive in the mornings, something about how pretty and warm you look after waking up, he'd once said. you felt the same, finally looking up to make eye contact with the pretty boy currently hitting your cervix over and over. the softness of his features early into the morning, still tired but simultaneously full of energy to fuck you with made you shudder.

wonwoo came first, filling you to the brim as he began to rub at your clit, wanting you to climax with him. you'd only finished a few seconds later, as he was barely coming down from his own high.

you both fell limp against the bed, side by side as you attempted to catch your breaths.

"baby ..." he spoke up first, "just call in sick. you're already late. i'll make it worth your while ..."

you didn't even need to respond, knowing your body would betray you once again.

~

it was a regular saturday. and every saturday you had the luxury of staying home, free of work. wonwoo had a tendency of matching his days off with yours, wanting to spend the very little free time you had together. unfortunately, most days off were spent running errands and doing household chores, which is what you were doing right now.

you'd usually split the household duties with wonwoo, alternating between what each of you would do. this week it was your turn to do the laundry, while wonwoo took care of vacuuming. you usually enjoyed doing the laundry, but unfortunately for you, this week you had to wash all your towels and sheets on top of the usual load of laundry. but you did it with no complaint, knowing your also-tired boyfriend was currently helping out with his part.

you focused on the laundry for a while, separating what needed to go on different loads while humming along to the song playing from your phone. that is, until you felt something, or rather, someone creep up on you from behind. suddenly hands had appeared on your hips, and a new warmth pressed up against your back. it was wonwoo, of course. unable to keep his hands off you once again.

"nonu, did you finish vaccuming?", you asked, barely reacting to his sudden touch, being completely used to him grabbing at you at any and every possible time.

he simply hummed against you, beginning to let his hands wander, landing on your breasts as he interrupted your folding of clothes.

you sighed, seeming frustrated but not actually being so, "wonwoo, i need to finish the laundry. later, okay?"

"baby ... c'mon. you want it too, i know you," with this, he began to fondle your tits, pinching at your nipples through your clothes and beginning a slow grind against you. he was hard again, at no one's surprise.

as anyone may have guessed, it didn't take long for him to get you to open your legs for him, sitting atop the drier as he hammered into you, banging your bodies against the harsh material of the machine. it was an uncomfortable position, granted, but the pleasure wonwoo always managed to give you overpowered any discomfort.

"n-nonu! shit, right there!", the lower angle in which he was ramming himself at was making you see stars, enjoying the way his pelvis ground against your clit.

he didn't tend to be too vocal, usually sticking to low groans and dirty talk against your ear, which is what he was doing once more.

"hate doing chores baby. just want your pussy .. hate how busy we are lately. gotta fuck you whenever i can. gotta keep you nice and full."

and full he kept you. having either fucked, sucked or gagged you multiple times throughout the rest of the day. his reasoning kept being that today was your one day off that matched both your schedules, and that he'd wanted to take full advantage of it. even after finishing inside you after fucking you on top of the drier for fifteen minutes, he moved on immediately to face you against him, lowering himself to the floor in order to lick at you from behind, eating some of his own cum in the process.

"so fucking tasty. jesus, baby you're perfect."

it was insane to you how insatiable the once shy boy was when it came to your body, but now wasn't the time to think about that. not when you were too busy throwing your head back and pushing your ass against his face in order to get him to lick and suck more at your swollen cunt.

he loved how responsive you were. never denying him and always enthusiastically letting him get away with whichever perverted escapade he wanted at the moment. the thought of his pretty baby being so nice and ready for him at all times made him shove his face even closer to you, sucking at your clit in a way that made you scream out his name. cumming came soon after, having felt overly sensitive after getting no break between your orgasms. you finished with yet another scream of his name, almost dropping on top of him as he lightly licked at you through your high.

"you okay?," he asked after getting up, helping you lean against the dryer in order to not drop due to your wobbly legs.

"you need to stop fucking me every five minutes, nonu. you're gonna render me useless," you chuckled out of breath, despite not meaning your words.

"yeah? let's test that theory out."

[dyns33]

Obvious

Most of the time I see him as the cool silly big bro, but I love Deadpool, so here's a long Deadpool x female reader.

Normally nothing destined Y/N to meet Wade Wilson.

A normal life, without enemies, without superpowers, without contracts on her head. She didn't fight, respected the law (at least for the most serious and important things) and she considered herself to be a good person.

The first time she had passed Saint Agnes Orphanage, she hadn't really paid it much attention. The second time, she found it a little strange that an orphanage was in this part of the city, which was not really made for children.

Then one evening, when she had had a bad day, she realized that it was a bar and she decided to go in for a drink.

Since she thought an orphanage was strange in that place, she might have thought it was odd for a bar to have such a name. She could also have been scared when she saw the other customers, who all turned towards her, indicating that she might not be welcome.

But Y/N was tired, and she just wanted a drink before going home, so she smiled politely as she sat down at the counter.

The waiter frowned, but he agreed to serve her with a shrug, muttering that as long as she was an adult, it wasn't his problem.

A tall, bald, tattooed guy then approached her, putting a hand on her arm without worrying about her private space, asking her if she wanted to follow him home.

"… No thanks."

“Come on, don’t be a slut.”

"Please."

“Come with me, you stupid bitch.”

"Now, that's really not very nice. The lady said no, a gentleman should know it's time to leave. But no Hector, not only are you insisting, but you're being rude."

"Fuck you, Wade, don't get involved in this !"

The waiter continued to mumble about cleaning, while this Wade guy smashed Hector's head against the counter. A tooth even flew close to Y/N’s face.

That might have been enough to scare her completely. In addition to the surge of violence that was happening right next to her, there was the red suit, the katanas and other guns, which could make you want to flee as quickly as possible.

But when he finished kicking Hector's ass, Wade turned to her, and despite the mask, it was obvious that he was smiling, extending a hand towards her.

"Miss, my apologies for that boor. He knows nothing of good manners."

"… Thank you."

"You're very welcome, lovely angel ! Wade Wilson, Deadpool, Merc with a mouth, at your service ! Oh, he spilled your drink… Bad Hector ! Or was it me ? Maybe it was me. Weasel, the same for the little lady, on my note !”

“You already owe me a fortune.”

“I will kill whoever you want for free !”

“I thought you didn’t kill anymore.”

"Ah yes… I'll suck you for free !"

“Here you go, two drinks, just shup up Wade.”

In the end, Wade was a bit special, but not evil. He stayed with her, partly because he loved having someone to talk to, but also to make sure no one else was going to bother her again.

And he talked a lot. Everything he said didn't always make sense, he even seemed to be talking to himself sometimes, but he was funny. It seemed to please him that Y/N laughed at his jokes. Behind the counter, Weasel was still muttering that she was doing something silly.

Among the long tirade he delivered that evening, she understood that Wade had not had an easy life. That he had done some things that could make him a criminal, but he had been trying to improve for some time.

"Colossus already wanted me to become an X-men but it wasn't for me. Wait, there are X-men in this universe ? I do not know anymore. Anyway, there's Spidey and Devy. No, he's right, this nickname isn't great, Devil. Like Daredevil. They want us to be Team Red, but only if I stop unliving people. It's not fair because they're friends with Frank, and Frank keeps unliving people, but he lost his wife and his kids, so I guess he has more sympathy points than me."

"I don't understand everything, but I guess Spidey is Spiderman ?"

"Yes ! He's super cool ! And his ass ! People confuse us sometimes, it annoys me, but it's a bit of a compliment. He's my role model."

Like a true superhero, Deadpool insisted on taking her home. He was terribly honest, saying that he could leave her a few blocks away, but that was useless, because as a former mercenary, he was very good at stalking people and he could find her address without difficulty, even if he only had her name.

"Which I wouldn't do ! Normally. I might want to see you again, and ask Weasel to find your number, but I know myself, I'll put it in my phone, and I'll hesitate for weeks, then I'll send a lousy message, you'll be scared, you'll block me, I'll be ashamed and I'll shoot myself in the head because I'm a moron."

“I can give you my number.”

"And I… Huh ? Huh ?! For real ?!" exclaimed Wade, jumping like a child on Christmas Day.

Wade called her right away, specifying that it was not to verify that she was giving him a false number but a little. Despite the mask, his face showed surprise when he saw that she hadn't lied.

"I should put a bullet in my head to make sure I'm not dreaming."

“You wouldn’t wake up.”

“Baby girl, we only just met, there are a lot of things you don’t know about me.”

When Deadpool talked about shooting himself, he meant it literally. It often happened that he died, either because of an enemy, an accident, or by his own hand. But he always came back. A gift like a curse.

They became friends. It was obvious, and quite sad, that Wade didn't have many friends.

Most people around him couldn't stand him or were afraid of him. It was true that he could be quite unpredictable, especially when he got lost in his discussions with the boxes, or an imaginary audience. But he was never mean.

Weasel was more of a collaborator, Al was forced to accommodate him, and the other heroes, unable to get rid of him, tried to make him a nice guy.

And he was really nice. Crazy but adorable, funny and wanting to do well.

Very quickly, Y/N started to have a crush, and even more. Even after seeing him without a mask. He never took it off completely to eat, repeating that he didn't want her to lose her appetite or feel like throwing up.

But after landing in a trash can after a fight, and forgetting that he had invited her to watch Princess Bride, Y/N had seen him. Yes, his scars were a bit impressive, but they weren't that bad.

With an embarrassed smile, he waved his hand while remaining frozen near the entrance.

"… I can move if you want to run away. I won't follow you. I may look like Frankenstein's monster, but I only pursue young girls who ask me to. Or who deserve it. Because criminals have no gender, I don't discriminate."

“I brought popcorn.” was her only reaction.

"... Oh. Sweet ? Salty ? Caramel ? Al must have beer somewhere, hidden with the cocaine."

After that, he was a little less afraid to show his face, even though it was obvious he wasn't comfortable. It wasn't easy to reassure him, repeating that she didn't care about his appearance.

Y/N didn’t remember how they ended up having this conversation. The only thing she knew was that she was pressed against him, laughing, when she had innocently said it would be fun if they went out together.

This made Wade laugh, but a very serious laugh, leaving no chance and hitting where it hurt.

"You and me ? Ah ! No chance."

"Why ?"

"It's obvious."

A simple little sentence could sometimes do a lot of damage. Too busy making fun of the characters on the screen, Wade didn't see Y/N's look of sadness, just as he didn't feel her body stiffen.

Still, she should have expected this response. Of course it was obvious that they had nothing to do together. Deadpool was a super hero (in training), he was tall, muscular, funny, rich.

She had seen photos of his deceased ex, Vanessa. She had observed him flirting with beautiful women and men before. It was already fortunate that she was only friends with him.

So Y/N swallowed her pride, accepting the obvious, and not talking about the subject again.

But it was hard, because the more time passed, the stronger the feelings became.

It was even harder when Wade entered his depressive phases. He kept putting himself down, insulting himself and accepting insults from the boxes in his head. It took a lot of patience and perseverance to get him to put down his gun.

"Anyway, I'll come back later. Bad luck for the world. People would be happier if I wasn't here anymore. Maybe they'll miss me a little, for a few minutes."

“I would miss you, Wade.”

"Yeah… You say that because you're adorable, baby girl. But you'd be better off without me too. I'm a real drag."

“You saved me the first time we met.”

"And since then you think you owe me a debt. You know, every time we're in the street, the others look at me and they're afraid. If I wasn't there, you could be with them. You could have lots of friends.”

"I don't want lots of friends, Wade." Y/N sighed, taking him into her arms. “I’m glad we’re friends.”

“Oh, sweetie pie, me too !”

It was rarer for them to find themselves in the opposite situation. Not because Deadpool wasn't capable of empathy, but because she didn't like talking about her problems, preferring to keep everything to herself and cry out of sight.

Unfortunately, she had made the decision to become friends with a former mercenary who loved to jump from roof to roof, only to come visit without warning by tapping on the window.

Y/N had no time to hide her tears, holding back a sob as her eyes met those of Wade, who had stopped mid-movement, fist raised against his window.

He didn't hesitate before entering, terribly serious.

"Who ? Who did this ?"

“Wade…”

"Who made my baby girl cry ? I want a name. Spidey and Dev will understand. Yellow wants decapitation, White wants emasculation. Tell me who."

"It's really not necessary. It's not important."

“It’s important if you cry.” Deadpool growled as he looked around the apartment for clues.

Once he had an idea in his head, it was almost impossible to divert his attention. If it wasn't so important, it was possible with food or talking about Spiderman's butt. But this time he considered it very important.

Tired, Y/N thought that all she had to do was say that it was just a ridiculous heartbreak for him to calm down. He had no reason to kill someone just because they didn't love her back.

This actually seemed to calm him down a bit, as he patted his cheeks with his hands in a dramatic gesture.

"What ?! Someone doesn't love you ?! Someone doesn't like my sweet little angel ? Are they crazy or stupid. You deserve the best !"

"Actually… He's the one who's too good for me."

"Bullshit ! The important thing is love ! If a woman can marry a space duck, then everyone can be together, as long as it's legal and consensual !"

"… What ? No, wait, it doesn't matter. Wade, please forget it."

"A name. Let me prove to you that this fool doesn't deserve you, and not the other way around !"

"No."

"A name !"

"You ! It's you !"

For the first time since they met, Wade was silent for more than a minute, staring at her like he wasn't sure she was real. He often had hallucinations, so this happened to him.

Then he muttered incomprehensible things, probably speaking with his boxes to check that he had heard what she had just said.

"… Me ? As in, me ?"

“I know what you’re going to say.” Y/N sighed, wanting to disappear. "You've already said it, it's obvious that we're not meant to be together. You're charismatic, and strong, and funny, with powers. You save people, you have an extraordinary life, while I… I am me."

"… Baby girl. Do you have a fever ? Did you lose a bet ? Because… You saw me without a mask. You know I'm crazy and dangerous. There are several bounties on my head, I've unlived more people than the population of New York, and my favorite movie is Zoolander 2. When I said it was obvious… I meant that you were too good for me."

There had been a misunderstanding, each being convinced that the other could never want the other, because they were too different. But even though he was special, with skin problems and an inability to concentrate for more than ten minutes, Wade was much better than a space duck.

However, while she was sure of what she wanted, he hadn't clearly said what he expected next.

"I mean, if you just want to be friends, I'll understand."

"You can't tease me like that and then break my heart. Don't play with me, woman !"

“Wade…” Y/N sneered, as he gesticulated like a degenerate, declaiming his great love for her and her smile, the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Taking advantage of his inattention, she approached him, until he froze when he felt her hands on his mask.

With a look, she asked him if she could take it off, and as he didn't move to stop her, she took it off first up to his nose, before hesitating.

Y/N didn’t want to make him uncomfortable, but she also didn’t want him to think that she didn’t want to see him if she didn’t go further. So she took out the whole mask, she observed Wade, smiling before kissing him.

"… Don't take what comes next as a bad thing." he whispered as their lips parted.

"What ?"

"I'm going to have a heart attack…"

As always, Y/N thought he was joking at first, until he collapsed in front of her, looking delighted even though his heart had stopped beating. Fortunately she was used to seeing him die, even if it was still a little traumatic.

It took almost an hour for him to wake up. Y/N had time to take a shower and make herself some tea, sitting on the couch to wait.

"Shit !" he shouted as he opened his eyes, looking around the apartment before looking at her. “Did we kiss ?”

“Yes and you died.”

"It's weird. Normally you go to heaven after you die, not before. But I probably don't have enough superhero points for heaven yet, so the other option is that I became totally crazy."

“Wade…”

"I know, White and Yellow would have told me. They're already saying that all the time, but they would have insisted, especially for me to escape from the asylum. It's no fun fighting with fake people and hippos. Was I dead long ?"

“No, a little over half an hour.”

"And you stayed with me, it's so cute. Nurse Y/N. No, Doctor Y/N, and I'll be Nurse Wilson. Oh, Doctor Y/N, I made a mistake in the dosage of a patient, I'm a bad nurse, punish me."

"… Let's see Nurse Wilson, we're in the middle of an intervention, calm down."

"Uh oh ! You're playing along !" Wade exclaimed, pouting from the ground. "I didn't expect that ! Wait, I need a blonde wig, and a white dress. You'll see, I look super sexy in a dress. Wait, we do this now or it's quick and we should have a date first ?'

“I wouldn’t say no to a date.”

"I see the genre, like in novellas. Doctor Y/N takes me to the restaurant to talk about my future promotion, but in fact, you are going to admit to me that I am pregnant with you, before I even enter your bed !"

“As long as you’re in my bed before the hundredth episode.”

“UH !”

The small, high-pitched cry of pleasure preceded a second cardiac arrest, Deadpool's mind imagining Y/N and him in a bed, with a stetoscope.

When she asked him if he was going to have a heart attack every time, he told her that he would probably die for good the day he saw her naked, or that they made love for the first time.

But Wade was a gentleman, he ate lots of vegetables, exercised, and begged Daredevil to teach him meditation techniques.

So he had the courtesy of having the next heart attack only after they were finished, and in the toilet. And every time after that they were together, Wade would go out of his way to just get a nosebleed.

Especially on Weasel's counter, telling him everything they had done or almost everything, which annoyed the poor waiter a lot, even if he knew that it would happened from the start, the moment he saw Deadpool with Y/N.

[cottonlemonade]

A Little Push

Makki was currently leaning at the counter of the coffee shop, waiting for the order and you were trying your hardest not to drool as you were waiting with Oikawa, Mattsun, and Iwaizumi at the table in the corner.

"Hey, y/n. I think you dropped something.", Oikawa said, dragging you out of your dream world.

You looked down, fumbling with your jacket, then your bag, trying to find out what he meant.

"What?"

"Your standards."

Mattsun took a decidedly inconspicuous sip of water, looking at the ceiling and Iwaizumi raised a brow at his friend.

"Was that necessary?", the ace asked flatly.

"Is it necessary that they are still just gawking at each other rather than just finally f-"

"Think carefully about your next words, Trashykawa.", Iwaizumi grumbled and glanced around, worried that someone might overhear.

"He does have a point.", Mattsun agreed.

"They're gonna be ready when they're ready.", noted Iwaizumi wisely and smiled at you.

You returned the sentiment, grateful for his support, then he shrugged and added, "Until then just ignore them. That's what I do."

"Iwa!"

The other two boys broke into laughter, causing Makki to throw another longing look over his shoulder to you.

He still wasn’t quite sure of your feelings yet. He had his suspicions of course when you nearly had a heart attack last week when he picked a lash off your cheek, but remained otherwise entirely unconvinced, no matter how many times the guys assured him that it was safe to ask you out.

Carefully, he carried the coffees over to the table and set them down. His friends sat in such a way that guaranteed he would share the narrow bench with you. After he joined you, there were several moments of awkward silence in which he became acutely aware of your chubby thigh pressing against his.

“Wanna play truth or dare?”, Oikawa blurted out suddenly and, not waiting for an answer, he continued, “Super. Hey Makki, truth or dare?”

The wing spiker, a little perplexed, looked from Mattsun, who again pretended to inspect the ceiling, sipping some more water, to Iwaizumi, who just appeared mildly interested in the napkin holder in the middle of the table.

He knew both of the options would bring his downfall so decided to take the lesser of two evils. “Dare.”

The second he saw Oikawa’s devilish grin, he knew he was done for.

“Peeerfect~”, the captain said slowly, dragging out the word as much as possible, before looking at you, who seemed just as horrified by Oikawa as Makki felt.

Unnecessarily tousling his perfect hair, the setter simply leaned back in his chair. “Well, you know what I want you to do with her.”

“You do realize they are in public, right?”, Iwaizumi reminded his friend.

Oikawa raised his hand to his chest in pretend shock. “Where is your mind, Iwa-chan? I was talking about a harmless kiss.”

[snek-eyes]

I keep thinking about what slotting the Job sequence in between the Flood and the Crucifixion does for Crowley’s arc, and his relationship to both Aziraphale and heaven.

@amuseoffyre did a great analysis of the importance to Aziraphale's arc here that sparked this thought, but it sent me down a rabbithole because A+C are both having very different experiences here.

Compare how Crowley bounces up to Aziraphale at the flood vs how standoffish he is when the angel shows up to the Job situation. Aziraphale is the one who's all friendly, "Oh it's you!" while Crowley... is pretty businesslike, at least until he gets the chance to start rubbing the reality of the situation in the angel's face. 

The flood pissed Crowley off. Job is the first time we start to see the more bitter Crowley we'll get to know. In the Garden he was bemused about overreactions and almost having fun poking this angel with questions about God's plans. Beginning of the flood sequence he was pretty playful. This whole earth thing hasn't been so bad so far, and oh here's that weird angel again, that's fun. 

But then he gets hit with God turning on their creation without warning, again. And the flood was at least in God's name ("That's more the type of thing you'd expect my lot to do," he said. Wasn't heaven supposed to be the good guys?). But now with Job? God turns their back and just... doesn't stop hell. Heaven's hands stay clean while hell dirties their evil little claws. Oh, so this is how things are, Crowley realizes. This is the part he's meant to play. Fine. 

And seeing how he acts here... I can't help but feel like he'd mostly given up on Aziraphale after the flood. After Crowley went, "Wtf, this is clearly an atrocity," and Aziraphale stuck to "You can't judge the Almighty!" ...well. Giving away the flaming sword was probably a fluke. Just another tool of heaven, that one. Disappointing, but what should he have expected? 

So all through their Job interaction he plays up his demonicness, trying to force Aziraphale to toe the party line and prove Crowley's new view on things right, once and for all. But there is a crack there, because not-so deep down Crowley would love for Aziraphale to surprise him again.

(After all... he is lonely. Try some wine with me, or have an ox rib, angel.)

(Fascinated by the difference in Crowley's gleeful "That's just how it started for me, see you in hell" vs. "I'm not taking you to hell, Angel. I don't think you'd like it." And only admitting to the loneliness once he isn't totally alone anymore; I think the original lie was more to himself than anything. He's angry, he's bitter, these righteous angels shouldn't think they're any better than him, not when they can doubt too. But when it comes down to it? No, I don't actually want to drag you all the way there. Something about guns and miraculous escapes, and his comment about Wee Morag, it's different when it's someone you know, isn't it. Hm. Anyways.) 

By the end of the Job situation they have a moment where they confirm they are more similar than they thought. But it's not a happy thing. It won't be until Rome when they start enjoying each other's company just for the sake of it. So at the crucifixion Crowley comes up to Aziraphale still prodding at him. You happy about this, Angel? You smirking over how righteous it is? But now instead of, "You can't judge the Almighty," we get "I'm not consulted on policy decisions." Implying he disagrees without really saying it. And that's enough for now, Crowley will take it. 

From the flood -> Job -> crucifixion -> Rome, we see Crowley get angry, then more and more resigned and bitter. Until Aziraphale reaches out and pulls him out of it.

[mythica-ithaca]

the fact that I see some of y'all posting more about how important it is to vote for Biden than you ever have about Palestine just shows that you fucking "vote blue no matter who" people genuinely don't give a fuck about anyone but yourselves.

you only choose to speak up when YOUR hypothetical rights are threatened. you love to fear monger about how much hypothetically worse it would be under trump than acknowledge the actual atrocities that Biden is committing and condoning every single day. how exactly is he the "lesser" of two evils for?

do any of you actually look at the images coming out of gaza, or are you too fucking ~triggered~ to fully acknowledge other peoples suffering rather than your own. have you seen the video that came out recently of the little boy whose brain is exposed, about to be laid next to his dead family members, only to twitch and seize in his fathers arms as he screams and runs in horror to find a doctor, because his son is alive. his brain is literally falling out of his skull but he is still alive. that is one brief example of the most horrific shit you've ever seen in your life coming out daily for almost a year. how on this earth can you watch that and possibly claim that Biden is in any way shape or form "less" evil.

instead of demanding that the dnc force a different candidate, you're trying to guilt trip people who have actually seen the mutilated bodies of children on their timelines every single day and watched the press briefings of bidens administration denying genocide and defending Israel at the expense of literally everything else for the last 8 months, into voting for a man who supports it 100% and has not and will not be convinced otherwise.

this is where allowing them to push widely unpopular and centrist candidates has gotten us. it didn't work with Hillary in 2016. it BARELY worked in 2020. and hate to break it to you, but its probably not going to work again. so congrats. your "vote blue no matter who" rhetoric has got them thinking that they can push the most right leaning liberals on us and think that we'll vote for them just because they're in a blue tie instead of a red one.

if you care about democracy like you say you do, then the Democrats should be fucking TERRIFIED that you won't vote for them if they don't deliver. not constantly reassured that they can commit literal fucking genocide and still get your votes if they dangle abortion rights over your heads. you realize they see those posts too right? the ones that say "Yes! protest vote in the primary but make sure to actually vote for the guy in the general!!" like. you are literally telling them how performative your activism is.

if every election at this point is the one where democracy is on the line then we are already fucked. if they don't get it through their heads now that we will not support this shit, then every election to come will be between a fascist and a fascist who cares slightly less about whether gay people get married or not. but that's all you care about right? as long as your domestic policy is in your favor then the rest of the world can suffer at your tax dollars.

this isn't about morality voting. this is about recognizing that there is not actually a "lesser" of two evils in this situation, just because you think that the causes that you personally care about will be less affected one way or the other. because what if it was abortion rights? what catholic Joe Biden was firmly against abortion and was threatening to ban it completely and throw anyone getting or giving one in prison for murder. what if it was videos of lgbt people being slaughtered coming out every single day for a year. genuinely fucking ask yourself if you'd still be saying "vote blue no matter who" and that he's the "lesser" of two evils.

vote for whoever the fuck you want. and I do genuinely urge you to vote for the most progressive candidate you can for the house and senate and your local elections. but for the love of god, stop trying to convince people that there is, in any sense of the word, a "Lesser" evil in this situation. stop trying to absolve yourselves of the fact that you are CHOOSING evil. it's genuinely sick.

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 7 part 1

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

ah yes, episode 7, a notoriously low stakes one that people are not emotionally invested in whatsoever. a mere 9.1 on IMDB, nothing to write home about.

we start with lilia dying, because life and death are a never ending cycle. and also because the people who made this show are evil

she's like a teardrop. good fucking shot.

meanwhile billy is marching on, puffing his chest, all stone faced. agatha is pretending to be a nice little guy, to make friends.

she's really TRYING, okay?

rio's busy reaping alice's soul, but we don't reveal that until later. and LMAO agatha being all like, I'm gonna be OPEN and HONEST and a good ment- except for that I donwannatalkabouthat

agatha after she babysits a little boy once, scares him shitless and tries to kill his mom: we CLEARLY had a connection there

that poor little dash in the subtitles. fighting for its life to convey the chasm of time she leaves between ex and best friend

LET'S HEAR IT FOR REBECCA WHO RAISED THIS BOY FOR FAR LONGER THAN WANDA OR AGATHA EVER DID

but the unfortunate fact is, wanda still is his mother. or rather, she's the witch who thoughtlessly created him and left a big scar in her wake. he has to deal with all that.

marvel's powers that be: wanda maximoff is definitely dead-dead

jac schaeffer and co. every chance they get: she sure is!!! *big fat kathryn hahn wink at the camera*

if they ever do a 'marvel most iconic line' poll we as a fandom are voting for this one. just to be clear.

I saw some reactors going ooooh it's ho***rts. HOW DARE YOU SIR. that's the wicked witch castle. billy maximoff would never.

I've been asking myself WHY agatha simply doesn't tell billy about the nature of the Road, not even now that everything else is out in the open. the only answer I can come up with is that the Road is real and it's here and deadly, it's not in any way an illusion. and since the Road is linked to billy's emotional state, we dont' want him to go ballistic one he realizes he's been killing witches. agatha has decided she can only soldier through at this point and get herself and billy's home, they can talk about the implications later. yes, she's really scared of what billy can do.

I've also been trying to figure out the moon phases:

Full moon - water phase, blue, Jen.

Waning moon - fire phase, red, Alice.

Blood moon or lunar eclipse (still a full moon): spirit phase, purple, Agatha

Waxing moon: air phase, yellow, Lilia

New moon: earth phase, green, Rio

so we get full moon, waning, full moon again, waxing, new moon. they're completely out of order??

this whole trial is the equivalent of billy calling lilia a slur. no fr it's billy repeatedly beating lilia over the head with a stick and going, reCLAIM IT RECLAIM THE DAMN SLUR YOU WITCH

i find kathryn hahn as the wicked witch of the west alarmingly hot and i don't know what that says about me

billy is like, i effin KNEW I'd look this good. oh god, the Road was just an excuse to cosplay as maleficent all along

i love how these two find themselves alone for five minutes and immediately proceed to BUTCHER a trial. i'm overusing tumblr lingo these days and all, but I still gotta say it: there is one single braincell in this whole coven and lilia has it. it's like leaving two children in charge

a cursory google search tells me the two sphinxes represent light and darkness, you need to learn how to control both for the chariot to move forward

she always is!! sort of. kind of. mostly.

agatha, who's about as spiritual as a q-tip: how hard caN THIS BE

I can totally see her as a con artist counting cards in vegas

somehow I cannot picture evanora homeschooling her. or sending her to school at all, for that matter. you know this bitch is self-taught.

someone with more time than me should totally check if there's any rhyme or reason to the cards these two buffoons drew

I'm gonna end this entry with lilia's eyes again so it's another nice circle. a fun little ouroboros!

damn patti has such big doe eyes

go to episode 7 part 2

[fuctacles]

What about milf 6?

Well, apparently I only had to proofread it so...

<<😺😺😺😺😺 | 😺😺😺😺😺😺😺>>

"Hello?"

The voice on the other end is not the one Eddie wants to hear, but he should have expected it. He did call a total stranger, after all. 

"Robin, right?"

"Yeah, who is it?"

He feels like he's already fucked up, somehow, but he pushes on.

"Eddie, I'm taking care of Stephanie's cats. I, uh, I think they want to talk to her."

He breathes out in relief when the woman on the other side laughs. 

"Yeah, I can hear that. Gimme a second. Steph!" She pulls the phone away from her, but the volume is still a bit too much. "Your boy is calling!"

"He's not my boy!" he thinks is what he hears from even further away before there's a clatter in the receiver, and a way softer "Eddie?"

"Hi." He brings the phone closer to his ear again. "How's your weekend going?"

"Really good, thank you. Robin nearly broke her finger trying to beat me in bowling and I ate way too many steamed dumplings. But I swear they are the best in the state."

"You a big fan of dumplings?" he asks with a chuckle.

"You have no idea, I'll eat any kind. Pierogies, dim sum, samosa... How are you doing with my little idiots, though? I can hear they're being evil again."

"Uh, yeah." Eddie turns to look at the three furry menaces sitting in a perfect line and meowing more off-tune than even Gareth ever could. "Seems like they really want to get into the bedroom."

Steph huffs into his ear.

"They think I'm hiding from them. Let them in and keep an eye out because I'm not getting new drapes again. Lure them out with catnip if they won't leave on their own."

"Okay."

"And, uh, if you see something weird, like, on the bed or something, just throw a blanket over it and pretend it's not there, okay?"

Eddie blinks at the closed door, Robin's distant laughter and the cat's very close cacophony melting his brain.

"Weird how?"

"Shut up, Rob!" Steph hisses to her friend before coming closer to the phone. "Underwear, uh, toys, the likes," she explains, voice slightly pained. 

"Gotcha," Eddie gulps at the prospect of running into Stephanie's sex toys. 

"I think I put everything away, but I'm not used to having men in my bedroom."

"Uh-huh, yeah, me neither."

Eddie is really tempted to bash the receiver into his skull. 

Stephanie clears her throat. 

"Hey, could you feed them this evening too? I was—"

"Absolutely," Eddie interrupts her, cringing at his own eagerness. "You just have fun with your friend."

"You sure?"

"Yes. Don't worry about it."

"Thank you so much. I'll pay you when I get back."

"What? No, absolutely not."

No no no no no, don't you dare turn it into a transaction, Stephanie.

"Well, help yourself to the beer, then."

That's better, that's how friends pay for favors. He deflates with relief. 

"Or food, the TV, anything you want."

"Thanks," he says, but doubts she's heard him over the commotion on the other end. The sounds are not dissimilar to Jeff's two toddler siblings fighting. 

"Well, I'll be back tonight or early morning, so just leave the key under the doormat."

"You don't have a spare?" he frowns. 

"Robin has it, in case of emergencies." 

That sounds like a weird arrangement but Eddie's not going to question it. 

"I could wait for you," he offers, but as soon as it leaves his mouth he realizes how weird it sounds. "I stay up late anyway, you can just drop by my uncle's and I'll hand you the key," he quickly amends.

"The doormat is really enough," she assures him but he doesn't like the idea of leaving anyone's key in an obvious place.

"What? Sorry, I can't hear you over the meowing. I'll see you later."

She huffs, and he hopes it's an amused, fond huff, like his uncle gives him. Then hopes it's not. He doesn't want Steph to respond to him like his uncle does. 

"Sure. Later, Eddie."

He finally opens the door to her bedroom, and it's like a switch has been flipped. The noise immediately ceases, and the cats rush inside. 

"You guys are insane," he mutters, following them. He turns the light on and looks curiously around, tamping down any sense of guilt. 

He spots a white bra thrown over the end of the bed and pulls the blanket over it so he can pretend it's not there. Everything smells like Steph and he has this millisecond urge to plop face-first into her bedding and just inhale her.

When they don't find their owner where she should be, the cats retreat without the need for a bribe. Eddie closes the door behind them and his body deflates with a soft sigh.

When he's back in the evening though, he makes a grave mistake. 

He lets himself indulge a little, grabs a beer from the fridge, and peruses Stephanie's movie collections. It's mostly romantic comedies, and, surprisingly, the Star Wars movies. He picks the first one and plucks it into the VHS.

The couch sinks under his butt and he sighs in contentment as the opening credits appear on the screen. He could stay here, binge the trilogy, and welcome Steph home.

Open her a beer and massage her feet and kiss her hello. Like a loving husband.

Eddie sighs at his own thoughts, falling deeper into the cushions. He met Steph two days ago and meanwhile, there's a girl back in Indy he's been idly flirting with. And that cute guy from Battle of the Bands.

But they fall apart in the face of Stephanie's beauty, of her luscious hair and disarming smile. Eddie slides down a little bit further. Arwen decides it's an invitation to sit on his lap and he welcomes the distraction, petting her mindlessly. 

Sometime later, he considers getting another beer, but he's trapped under the black cat. He nudges her gently, but all he gets is a warning side eyes so he raises his hands in defeat.

"Okay, I'm not moving." He admits his loss and focuses back on the movie.

ko-fi