#but yes!!! good year for me!!!! i had a lot of fun

[justateenworkinglifeout]

Going over a year without suicidal thoughts brings a lot of awakenings. I am lovable, people can like me, although now I guess I have to plan for the future I never thought I could make it to. 13 year old me never gave a thought into high school classes, but now I'm being told to start thinking about what I want to do for college... It's so crazy to think that I've made it farther than I ever thought I would. And there's still more to look forward to. If you told 13 year old me that she makes it past 15, she'd probably break down at the thought of having to live that long. What she wouldn't think about is all the good things that have happened since.

I remember leaving my middle school for the last time, the best feeling ever. I remember going to summer camp. I remember going to my high school orientation and feeling hopeful for once. I remember the crash soon into the school year, yes, but I also remember how that led to the first moment of me feeling fully loved and accepted by my peers. I remember being comforted through a panic attack in the hallway at the Halloween dance. I remember my first audition at this school, I remember when I didn't get in. I remember trying again the next time and seeing my name on the cast email. I remember getting to be closer to all the people I had been admiring from afar all year. I remember all the fun outings, and the sleepovers, and the silly conversations that I get to have every morning. If 13 year old me knew I grew up, she'd think I'm still miserable. But now, even through the hardest times, I am loved and cared for.

Keep living yall. Things can work out.

Being like. Post-suicidal is so strange. Like hiiiii everybody im new I spent a good chunk of my life languishing and have like 3 or 4 lived experiences. But now I'm ready to fuck and party or whatever. Can we be friends. Im so happy to be here. Can we be friends

[a-pute11as]

ibiza holiday - leila ouahabi & misa rodríguez

word count - 8.8k | summary - laia convinces her bestfriend that a group holiday with her friends would be a good idea, yet previous encounters lead to some interesting experiences. leila x misa x reader.

MDNI 18 + - 18+ themes, basically smut but not smut, probably an incredibly unrealistic holiday set up

“nenaaaa, come on it’ll be fun!” laia whined as she tugged on your shirt for a second time. the two of you were sitting in your shared apartment, having just finished training, you were trying to relax but clearly laia had other ideas. 

for the past few hours she had been trying to convince you to say yes to a girls' holiday to ibiza in the off-season, a tradition that had been going on for years between her and her friends and yet somehow you’d been invited, even when you barely knew anyone who was going.

you and laia had become inseparable incredibly quickly. the two of you had previous connections before laia made her move to arsenal, being invited to celebrate the champions league win with kiera and lucy meant you got to know a few of the barca girls over some dancing, a lot of drinks and a hangover breakfast. 

“laia these are your friends, not mine, you can’t just invite me because you’ll ‘miss’ me for a few weeks” you used finger quotes around the word ‘miss’, clearly emphasising how dramatic laia had been in her previous convincing. 

“no no, the girls invited you, you must’ve made a good impression on them” she said, wiggling her eyebrows as she spoke. 

“wait, which girls?” you asked hesitantly, narrowing your eyes in her direction.

“espera déjame pensar” she dazed off for a minute, using her hands to count the players before speaking the list aloud, “there is alexia, jenni, leila and misa” she smiled. (wait let me think)

“jesus that’s a lot of people, i barely know any of them” you shook your head firmly, her convincing clearly not working.

“joder, if alexia putellas asks you to go on holiday you do not say no!” laia tutted, shaking her head the same way you just did. 

you thought for a minute as your mind went through the list of people, “wait, you said leila?” you asked curiously, now considering the offer slightly more than before. 

“si, maybe she is the one who asked for you eh” a smirk flashing across her face as she teased you. 

“shut up asshole” you muttered, “i was just making sure i heard you right”. 

“do not lie english woman, you are thinking about when you fucked her at my birthday party!” she accused, pointing her finger at you.

you smacked her hand down, “it was literally just a kiss codi, and you were the one who wanted to set us up!” you accused back.

“only because both of you kept talking about finding each other attractive and i didn’t want to hear any more” she defended, the two of you half-shouting at each other as you spoke. 

you settled in your chair and folded your arms across your chest, “i have no regrets, anyways why is misa coming? i thought this was a barca thing?. 

“hm more like a spain thing, you haven’t met misa before right?” she questioned.

“well we have a little bit, it was weird, obviously i was trying to score but she kept saying things like ‘vale princesa’ or would touch my waist and my back during corners, or there would be really intense eye contact, even at the end of the game she came and talked to me and said it again” you explained, “and lucy said she was looking me up and down but i don’t really believe her”.

you watched as laia’s smirk reappeared, “esto es clasico misa, she wants you”.

“what?” your eyes widened in shock, “that’s not true” you shook your head adamantly. 

“si, i know what she’s like, no wonder she was asking questions about you the last time i saw her”

“the night of the game she followed me on instagram and then liked a picture from 6 months ago and obviously unliked it, but she always likes my pictures now, sometimes she even comments” you shrugged. 

laia laughed at your oblivion, “you’re joking right?”, you shook your head, “nena you cannot be serious, she’s coming after you”.

“maybe she wants to be friends” you were trying to play the devil’s advocate, but you knew the heart eyes, the ‘guapaaaa’ or the ‘quiero’ she had commented on your instagram posts probably weren’t the friendliest. 

“ah si si, friends with benefits” she winked before getting up and disappearing to her bedroom, leaving you sitting on the sofa contemplating the choice you had to make. 

it wasn’t long before you heard multiple spanish voices coming from laia’s room, presumably the same ones you had just been talking about. whilst laia has been teaching you spanish throughout your time of living together, the words were far too fast for you to possibly translate.

pushing that to the back of your mind you made your way to the kitchen to prepare dinner for the two of you, you had your music on and were practically dancing around the kitchen as you cooked.

you spun round to see laia holding her phone in your direction, laughter spilling out of her mouth, immediately stopping in your tracks you nearly dropped the bowl in your hand. 

“baila bebe baila” a voice from her phone shouted, your face flushing red immediately as the others cheered along. 

“laia i fucking hate you” you stuck up your middle finger with your free hand before turning back to the dinner you were half way through. 

“now she won’t say yes to coming with us” a familiar voice echoed from the phone. 

she made her way over to you, putting her phone on the counter against the wall so you were now in the frame and unable to avoid it. you were met with the faces of alexia, jenni, misa and leila who were beaming in your direction. 

“hola chica, what are you making?” jenni spoke, a grin covering her face. you had met jenni a few times, mostly on an international stage but a few times at mutual friends birthday celebrations. 

“laia asked for pasta so i made it with chicken and mozzarella” you shared her smile as you continued stirring the pasta. 

“ahh so you’re wifey material then” misa smirked causing you to go slightly flustered. 

“deja de coquetear con ella” leila responded to misa before turning her attention to you, “how are you carino? it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other”. (stop flirting with her)

“i’m good, very excited to have some time off soon” you answered, “how are you?”

“very good too, are you going to join us on the trip?” she asked, a twinkle in her eye as she spoke. 

“joder, you were meant to let alexia ask” laia interrupted, rolling her eyes.

“laia are you trying to intimidate me into saying yes?” you questioned, raising an eyebrow as you faced her. 

she held her hand to her heart as she mocked pain, “nena i would never do that to you”.

“do not lie to her, she wanted me to ask you because she thinks you would be more likely to say yes” alexia explained, you reached over slapping laia on the arm as she tried and failed to move out of your reach. 

“you’re an asshole, codi” rolling your eyes at her, as you began plating dinner for the two of you. 

“si ella es pero, what is your answer?” alexia asked, smiling sweetly whilst her eyes felt like they were staring into your soul, the power the best player in the world had even off the pitch was crazy. 

you ran your hand through your hair as you stood thinking about the offer, it was dead silent and you could feel every set of eyes on you as you tried as quickly as you could to weigh out the pros and cons, but in reality, what's the worst that could happen?

“well i guess if it’s okay with you guys i’d be down for it” you said causally, maybe a part of you was actually quite excited about it.

the spaniards erupted with cheers as laia wrapped her arms around you, picking you up and spinning you around as she cheered, “buena elección mi mejor amiga”. (good choice my best friend)

you laughed as she continued spinning you around, clearly very happy that you had given into her persuasion tactic of getting alexia to ask you. she put you down after a minute or two, picking up the phone and running back into her bedroom as you set the table for the two of you. 

sitting down, you began eating as you waited for laia who seemed to be saying goodbye to her friends when your phone lit up. 

instagram notification - marisabel_rguez : see you soon princesa 

a small smile automatically appeared on your face as you read her message, your heart beat a little faster as you felt the butterflies dance around your stomach. spending a week with misa wearing little clothing definitely wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, and by the way your thighs tensed together at that thought, you were clearly more excited than you thought. 

your fingers moved quickly as you typed your response, carefully crafting a message that would come off as a little flirty but still casual. 

you : could’ve been sooner if you decided to play in england

satisfied with your response, you turned off your phone and continued eating. laia made her way back out to you, sitting across from you at the table with a smirk.

“why are you making that face” scrunching your nose at the suspicious look she was wearing. 

“nada nada, just this will be very fun” she shrugged, her smirk only growing, “and we are going on the plane with leila and meeting alexia, jenni and misa there”.

you tried to contain your smile as you were reminded that leila was joining you, but laia could read you like a book, “hm sounds fun”.

“oye you’re just going to flirt with all my friends whilst we are there and forget about me” she huffed, shaking her head as if she wasn’t the one who has encouraged it multiple times over the course of your friendship. 

“don’t be so dramatic, it’s not all of your friends” you rolled your eyes and her dramaticness “just one or two” you mumbled under your breath. 

your phone lit up again, this time a message from leila catching your eyes. 

instagram notification - leilaouahabi : the highlight of this trip will be seeing you in a bikini

before you could verbally react, your cheeks flushed a deep shade of red at her comment, but the thought of seeing her in a bikini too had you clenching your thighs yet again. a feeling that was starting to become far too familiar. 

“you okay nena?” your bestfriend asked, curiously peeking at your phone as her eyes widened slightly at leila’s forwardness. 

“mhm” you nodded as your whole body continued to heat up, “didn’t realise leila was so bold”.

she nodded slowly as she mumbled, “that’s not even the worst i’ve heard from her”

laia’s words piqued your interest, you raised your eyebrow at her words “meaning?”

“let’s say she has used some descriptive words to describe how she feels about you” you were slightly stunned into silence as you began pushing your food around your plate, not in a bad way, your mind had just become very distracted.

you picked up your phone, not leaving much time for her message to simmer before you wanted to reply, probably coming off as slightly desperate. 

you : i’ll pack my best one for you, it won’t be city blue though 

you were about to put the phone done but you immediately saw the three dots appear to indicate she was typing.

instagram notification - leilaouahabi : i don’t think i can manage with arsenal red, it’ll be better idea to just keep it off

slightly choking on the food you were trying to eat, you turned your phone off and flipped it so it was face down on the table. 

“i’m not even going to ask” laia smiled awkwardly as the two of you continued eating, the text leila had sent you in the back of your mind. 

after having 3 breakdowns about packing, 2 last minute trips to the shops for things you forgot and 1 slightly shouting match with laia over where she had put your gym clothes after emptying the washing machine, you were finally on the plane and somehow you had let laia coax you into the middle seat. the seat in between laia and leila. what could go wrong?

with laia fast asleep on one side of you and leila clutching onto your hand at every small jolt of the plane, it was better than expected. you and leila had the opportunity to actually talk to each other away from the football field, the same bold footballer that had told you she’d rather see you naked than in red wasn’t as brave in person, well not when you were 30,000 feet in the air. 

all the netflix movies you had downloaded for your flight became useless as the two of you sat talking about absolutely everything.

“where’s your favourite place?” you asked in an attempt to distract leila, as she turned your hand white from the grip she had on it as the plane went through a slightly bumpy patch. 

“home but in catalonia, not manchester” she clarified with a small anxious smile, her hand now loosening on yours as started brushing her thumb back and forth against your fingers. 

“do you miss being there? it must be difficult to live so far away from your family” you acknowledged, looking down at the patterns she was now drawing on your hand that was relaxing both you and her. 

“si, mucho” she nodded, “but for my career, it made sense to come to manchester, i needed a new challenge, so i couldn’t say no to manchester city”.

“maybe i should’ve tempted you with arsenal” you smirked, your team's rivalry had a way of appearing in every conversation, “you’d look better in red” she looked incredible in everything she wore but when she wore the red kit for spain she looked incredible. 

she shook her head adamantly, “no nena, you would look much better in city blue, it would make the blue in your eyes pop” she winked.

“well you’re going to have to put up with my very very red bikini” you smiled sweetly.

her tongue flicked over her lips as she cocked her head slightly, a smirk appearing on her face “we both know how i feel about that”.

“shut up” your cheeks instantly flushed a deep red colour as leila laughed at your reaction before changing the conversation back to something that was semi-normal. 

the three of you made your way to the villa you’d be staying at for the next few days, laia had offered to drive and of course leila dibs the front seat due to her ‘long legs’ yet you were left in the back to overthink exactly how this holiday was about to play out. 

you were about to spend a lot of time with two incredibly attractive footballers that apparently had the hots for you in very minimal clothing, your mind was racing in every direction possible.

the two girls in the front had spanish tunes blaring, the both of them singing along to the words that you could barely understand, but you couldn’t help but smile at their pure joy. maybe this was a better picture of what your week was going to look like, rather than the intense sexual tension you were imagining. 

“la guiri is here!” jenni cheered as the three of you walked through the door. 

you turned to laia with a questioning look, “oh it’s just a word for like an annoying tourist, but she means it in a loving way” she explained. 

immediately you were enveloped into a hug from jenni, followed by alexia as they greeted you before asking how your flight had been. you’d be lying if you said you were looking around for misa, the real madrid player not being with her friends as you arrived, but you held your questions. 

it didn’t take long for the four of them to naturally switch into spanish, you definitely couldn’t blame them though, they had invited you onto their holiday so the least you could do was let them speak in the way that was most comfortable for them.

“do you know what they’re saying?” you jumped out of your seat slightly as you turned to face the voice. 

it took you a second to register the sight in front of you, looking down at you was misa in what you assumed was her workout clothes which only consisted of a sports bra and shorts. her hair was slightly damp and there was a slight sheen to her tanned skin that made it look like she was glowing. her abs were on full display, and you were unashamedly looking. 

she interrupted your blatant staring with a cough, forcing your eyes back up to hers. “what did you say?” you asked awkwardly, not even apologising for the way you were eye-fucking her. 

“the spanish, do you understand it?” she reiterated, a cocky smirk now plastered onto her face, pleased with the reaction you’d give her.

“nope, laia has only taught me the basics, and they speak so fast so” you shrugged, briefly looking back over at the four friends before meeting misa’s eyes again. 

“so do i get a hug too?” her head tilting slightly as she smiled down at you.

you nodded, matching her smile, standing up as she made her way in front of you. you held your hand out as she pulled you to your feet, your hands then wrapped around her neck whilst hers snaked around your waist and rested on your lower back. 

it was only for a few seconds but you easily relaxed into her arms. her fingers drew circles on the exposed skin of your back making you melt further into her embrace. even after being in the gym, she smelt incredible, you couldn’t help but fall deeper into bliss.

you were interrupted by a whistle, the two of you breaking apart and facing the direction it had come from. jenni, alexia and laia had wide grins on their face whilst leila had a tense look across her face and her arms were crossed against her chest. 

“please do not fuck infront of us” jenni smiled, earning a playful smack from alexia. 

“in misa’s dreams” leila muttered, refusing to make eye contact with you but sending a deathly glare in misa’s direction. 

you were hesitant to question leila’s tone, worried you had misheard what the spaniard had said and somehow created a sense of jealousy in your head, instead opting to go to your assigned room to unpack your things and settle for a bit.

it didn’t take you long to unpack, probably 20 minutes or so, and you were eager to get yourself out into the sun. opting for the bright red bikini you packed, you slipped on your coverup and made your way outside to the pool. as you walked through the house you noticed it had become eerily quiet, none of them were sitting on the sofas as they previously were, yet there was a faint buzz of spanish music coming from the pool. 

slipping out of the doors, you were met with a tanned dark haired woman spread across a sunlonger, dressed in a white bikini that left little to the imagination with the addition of a black cap that presumably was keeping the sun out of her face. as you got closer you noticed the tattoos that were littered along her arms, recognising that they belong to the man city player that had joined you. part of you felt rude for interrupting her when she looked so at peace, it was as if it she was in her natural element, but 

“hola” you hummed, placing your things down on the adjacent sunlounger as you began to take off your coverup. 

she jumped slightly, her alarmed expression switching to a sweet smile as she looked up at you “oye carino you scared me”

you giggled at her response, “where did everyone go?” you asked, laying out your towel before planting yourself on the sunlounger. 

“hm i think they went to the shops for food but i offered to stay with you instead” her smile now turning into a smirk that was somewhat cheeky but also really cheesy.

you rolled your eyes playfully at her words, “how kind of you ouahabi, i’ll remember that next time one of your tackles knocks me off my feet”.

“i’m known for sweeping girls off their feet, sometimes literally” she laughed with a small shrug. 

you knew leila was bold, laia had told you a few stories about the things she’d do on nights out when she first peaked your interest, but you didn’t know just how bold she was until the dm’s she had sent you. you’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy this side of her, it was relaxed and cheeky and you liked it a lot. 

a comfortable silence fell amongst the two of you, leila softly singing the tune of the music that was playing from speaker she had placed next to her sunlonger. in your moments of relaxation you had forgotten about applying any form of sun protection on your back, which probably wasn’t the best idea considering the sun that was beating down on you. 

gaining some courage you spoke up, now propping yourself on your elbows, “leila, can you put some suncream on my back? i was going to ask laia but she obviously disappeared”

you could physically see the gulp as her mouth parted slightly, you waited for an answer, one of your eyebrows raising slightly as you questioned her reluctance. “if not it’s okay” you added, worried you had made her somewhat uncomfortable. 

her eyes widened at your words as she sat up quickly, “no no” she cleared her throat, “of course i can, i was just uh.. translating what you said in my head” a nervous smile on her face as her legs moved to the side of her sunlounger signalling you to turn your back to her. 

moving your hair to your shoulder, you shuffled back, handing her the suncream over your shoulder, it took a couple seconds longer than you anticipated for the cool lotion. as her hands met your back a shiver ran down your spine. her hands moved in slow, firm strokes, drawing patterns in a way that was soothing and methodical. you caught your eyes closing for a moment as you were lulled into a state of relaxation. 

reluctantly her hands were removed from your back, forcing your eyes to open in the sad realisation that the moment you were sharing was over. 

“thank you” you mumbled, shuffling yourself until you were laying back on the sunlounger, in your original position. 

as you got comfortable, the only thing on your mind was the feeling of leila’s hands against your skin, to you it felt intimate, as if the two of you had a moment that held some kind of meaning, but her initial hesitance had you questioning if she felt the same. maybe she wasn’t as bold as you initially anticipated. 

some more time passed in which comfortable silence fell back between the two of you, your eyes closed in an attempt to shield yourself from the sun allowing you to relax as much as possible. it wasn’t until you heard shuffling next to you that your eyes peaked open, your eyesight drifted to leila who was now standing at the end of her sunlounger, yet her eyes were firmly planted on you. 

from the corner of your eye, you watched as her eyes travelled up and down your body, her tongue dragging across her bottom lip before catching her lip between her teeth for a second, completely unaware of your eyes on her. the way she looked at you was predatory, you felt as if you were sinking into your chair a little more every second that her eyes were locked onto you. it was as if you were hers to use as she pleased, and you were more than okay with it. 

your eyes finally locked with hers. her eyes instantly widened as if she was a deer in headlights.

“i’m going to cool down in the pool” she spoke, excusing herself quickly before submerging herself in the pool within seconds. 

your gaze was fixed on her as her head popped out of the water, she lifted her hands, fingers sliding through the wet strands in a slow and effortless way, the sunlight reflecting off of her dark hair which made her look as if she was straight from the gods. it had your thighs clenching together for any form of friction. 

you were quickly snapped out of your daze from jenni cannonballing into the pool with a scream, causing a large splash to fly in your direction. 

you let out a sharp gasp, “jesus jenni, im soaked”, water droplets dripping down your half bare body.

“surprised to hear jenni’s name in that sentence and not misa’s or leila’s” laia said, emerging from the doors of the house to the pool area. 

“i hate you so much” you squinted your eyes in her direction, as you wiped the water from your arms. 

“you might as well get in the pool now too” laia laughed, placing her stuff next to you. 

her close proximity was all the invitation you needed. standing up quickly, you wrapped yourself around her, pressing your soaked body against her dry clothes.

“get off asshole” laia half-cried, squirming as she tried to pry your arms off, but she wasn’t quite strong enough.

“nope, this is what you get” you only tightened your grip, rocking her side to side as she continued to struggle.

when she finally stilled, you let go, stepping back with a satisfied and incredibly cocky grin. 

laia narrowed her eyes, “you’re going to regret that, estúpida” she lunged for you, causing you to instinctively took a few hurried steps back, only to collide with something solid.

before you could react, strong arms wrapped around you, effortlessly lifting you off the ground.

“lo siento princesa, time for a swim!” a familiar voice teased behind you. of course it was misa. 

your heart dropped as she carried you to the edge of the pool, your kicks and desperate pushes doing nothing against her ridiculous strength “misa don’t do it” you yelped.

she hummed in amusement, “hmm but you’d look so pretty wet” her voice dripped with smugness, you could practically hear the smirk on her face. 

before you could protest any further, you were airborne then plunged into the cold water with a splash. 

the rest of the day was spent relaxing, taking in the beautiful ibiza sun whilst trying your best to not get too burned, something the spanairds had already teased you about. you didn’t have any real plans for your first day on holiday, opting to take it slow with a few excursions scattered over your week's holiday. 

dinner was relatively simple, laia decided to take charge in the kitchen to avoid any food poisoning yet it was impossible to avoid the bickering that happened between misa and laia about what was being cooked and how laia was doing it ‘wrong’. a quick google search proved that laia was in fact doing it right and misa had just seen a tiktok hack that didn’t actually work. leila attempted to reason with misa before it got to the google search but misa was set in the opinion, jenni and alexia ended up staying out of it, choosing to watch the two argue whilst laughing under their breath.

you had a relatively early night, choosing to miss out on another round of drinks and yet another argument about who had the right uno rules. spoiler alert - it was you. but you had a plan for tomorrow ; gym in the morning and a boat trip for most of the day.

waking up you felt refreshed, the sun always made you feel like a brand new person, which was the perfect mood to be in for a holiday gym session. 

you got changed into a pair of your arsenal shorts and a sports bra, grabbing a towel and some water, before making your way to the gym attached to your villa. 

familiar songs made their way from the gym, you were shocked someone had made their way to the gym before you, but you were on holiday with some of the biggest footballers in the world, what else did you expect. 

opening the door you were met with misa, dressed in black shorts and a white sports bra, her hair had been thrown on top of her head into a messy bun, yet she looked incredible. misa was effortlessly pretty, she could’ve been dragged through a bush and she’d still come out looking out of this world. 

you paused at the door as you watched her body move, she seemed to be adding weights to a bar in front of the mirror. as she picked up the large circular weights, the muscles in her arms instantly became more defined.

the sound of a weight dropping snapped you out of your thoughts which had been running wild, misa turned round, meeting your presence with a smile. 

“beunas dias princesa, how did you sleep?” she asked, now standing up straight to meet your eyeline.

“good morning” you chirped, now walking into the area, placing your things down on the bench, “i slept really good, how did you sleep?”

“mine was good, i went to bed pretty soon after you did” she explained, you couldn’t tell if she was hinting that your lack of presence had sent her to bed early even when she was still surrounded by her close friends. “do you want to workout together?” she added.

you nodded in agreement, gathering your hair in your hands to scoop it back into a low bun “don’t go easy on me”

“i wasn’t planning to. but if you beg nicely, maybe i’ll let you catch your breath” yet again, her voice was laced with a pure cocky attitude, but this time you were going to rise to her level. 

you raised a brow, smirking. "oh, misa, i didn’t know you liked hearing me beg. should i be concerned?"

she leaned in slightly, you were met with an intoxicating scent of perfume that had your brain malfunctioning for a second, “only if you’re not going to”.

you bit your lip, holding her gaze. "guess you’ll just have to work for it, then." you left her standing there with a stupid grin on her face as you brushed past her to begin your warm up. 

“are you going to keep standing there like an idiot or come and warm up?” you questioned, looking at her from over your shoulder. her eyebrows slightly furrowed as if she was surprised with your newfound attitude towards her, but the small smile that appeared had you thinking she was a fan of it. 

the two of you bounced off each other throughout the hour workout, making stupid jokes but also having normal everyday conversations that had you learning much more about her than you thought this trip would reveal. of course there was still an underlying flirty attitude to both of your words, but you genuinely enjoyed getting to know misa even with the cocky smirk she had on her face as she watched you squat. 

towards the end of your work out, you were both starting to get slightly out of breath, you had been pushing each other in slight competition as you completed each of your sets. you made your way over to the bench where you had previously dropped your stuff, hoping to catch your breath. 

but that plan was quickly interrupted when misa casually plopped down on a nearby bench, leaning back with her arms stretched behind her, taking slow, deliberate breaths. you couldn’t help but watch as her chest rose and fell with each breath, the movement captivating. the glistening sheen of sweat on her skin caught the light, making every shift of her muscles more defined. after a moment, she shifted, leaning forward with her arms now resting on her thighs, still drawing in deep, steady breaths. you couldn’t look away. 

you couldn’t tell how long your gaze had been fixed on her, it felt physically impossible to avert your eyes in any direction when the sight in front of you felt like an art piece. yet it was probably affecting you more than you realised as a heat between your legs grew and your heart rate picked up. 

that’s when her eyes found yours, her classic smirk quickly appearing on her face, “te gusta lo que ves?” she asked, a cocky head tilt matching her smirk. 

you nodded without realising what you had down you had earnt an eyebrow raise from misa, your eyes widened as you quickly shock your head “i uh i’m going to shower bye” you spoke so quickly you were sure she didn’t fully understand, but you didn’t give her the chance to ask as you darted out of the room. 

after showering and getting ready for the day you tried to form some kind of plan of how you were going to approach the day. both leila and misa were sending you signals, yet you weren’t sure where it was going beyond those signals. considering you were about to spend the rest of the day on a boat in the mediterranean sea with plenty of alcohol, you needed some kind of game plan. 

your mental planning was interrupted as laia burst through the door, announcing her arrival with a very dramatic good morning before she dropped a bomb, “i heard what happened this morning”.

automatically your jaw dropped, “what the fuck”.

“i can’t believe you basically undressed her with your eyes, you should have fucked her” she giggled, poking her fingers into your arms causing you to swat her hand away. 

“laia shut up incase they can hear you” you hissed, “i couldn’t help it, she’s been flirting with me this whole time and the way she looked in the gym was just… i have no words for it” you tired to justify your actions but honestly you were just babbling. 

“clearly both misa and leila want to fuck you, so what are you going to do? fuck them both at the same time?” she spoke as if it was an outrageous idea, yet it had your brain thinking, which must’ve been obvious by your face, “oh my god you’re going to fuck them at the same time!”

“that’s not what i was thinking, you asshole” you muttered, your cheeks glowing red at the thought, “they don’t feel like that, you’re making it serious, it’s obviously just fun” you shook your head adamantly. 

“mhm that’s not what i’ve heard, they sai-” laia started to explain before being cut off by the sound of jenni’s voice echoing through the halls.

“laia, is the guiri ready?” jenni shouted. 

“tell her to remember her suncream and hurry up” alexia shouted shortly after her. 

you grabbed your bag that you had filled with all your essentials, especially your suncream, and walked towards the door, realising laia hadn’t followed your lead you turned back to see her sat on the edge of your bed with her mouth still slightly open as if she was about to say something. “are you coming?” you asked.

she snapped out of her gaze, “yes yes im ready”, pushing her up as she followed you out the door. 

it was a short walk to the boat, one that had been privately rented by alexia and somehow jenni had the right qualification to drive it which surprised you more than you’d like to admit and had you looking for the life jackets as soon as your foot stepped onto the boat.

it didn’t take long for the boat to be anchored in a beautiful cove that looked like something out of brochure. you were surrounded by beautiful cliffs, water which was so blue you could see the fishes swimming and a small beach of perfect white sand. it felt like a paradise away from the rest of the world, one that you very much enjoyed being in. 

you were laid on a towel at the front of the boat, sunglasses shielding your eyes as you tried to stay focused on the book you had bought with you. the sun was beaming down on you, mixing with the bright orange bikini you had decided on wearing. it was lighting up your skin as if it glowed, a sight which had both leila and misa’s eyes drifting across your body. 

“carino would you like a drink?” leila asked, causing you to look up from your book. she stood in front of you, shielding your eyes momentarily as the sun lit up around her. 

“mmm yes please” you practically moaned at the thought of a cold drink helping you cool down. 

your reaction had leila’s eyes wide as a grin appeared on her face, “if i knew that was how to make you moan i would’ve said it a lot sooner”.

“oh you wish it was that easy ouahabi, surprise me with your choice of drink” you smiled sweetly, causing leila to turn on her heels as she walked over to the makeshift kitchen in the shaded area of the boat. 

she made her way back in a few minutes, causing you to pop yourself up on your elbows as she knelt down to you on the floor, “try” she smiled, pushing the glass into your awaiting hand. 

you held the drink to your lips, the condensation on the glass slowly dripping onto your chest as you took a sip, your mouth quickly overwhelmed with a cool tropical flavour followed by the hint of an alcohol you couldn’t quite put your finger on. 

“leila this is delicious” you complimented, savouring the taste on your lips, “where did you learn to do this?”.

“i’m always on drinks duty when we have parties or celebrations” she shrugged smugly. 

you giggle at her, the way she spoke was so casual but you could tell she was proud of the mixologist title she had been given. she got herself comfortable on the floor next to you, her legs now crossed as she sat with you. you continued sipping on your drink as she told you some of her favourite recipes, you admired the way she spoke, it had an incredibly cheesy grin across your face. 

you must've sat there for a while as the conversation naturally drifted to the other plans you had for the off season as your drink had become empty and your head had a slight buzz to it. you were sure the drink didn’t contain a lot of alcohol but as an athlete you very rarely drank so when you did your tolerance was zero. 

“having fun?” a voice questioned, you craned your neck upwards to see a very wet misa in front of you.

“misa!” you smiled, happy with her presence but even more thrilled by the incredibly sexy sight that was standing right in front of you, “did you go for a swim?”.

“siii, it was beautiful, but not as beautiful as you” she winked, whilst it was incredibly cheesy, you couldn’t help but be a little bit affected by it as your cheeks heated up, “the others are still on the beach”. 

misa sat with the three of you, conversation flowing effortlessly, as if you’d all been friends for years. there was an ease to it, but your focus kept flickering elsewhere. you couldn’t ignore the way misa’s hand inched closer to your thigh, her confidence growing with every passing moment. your eyebrow lifted slightly at her boldness, but you didn’t move away.

leila had excused herself to refill your drink allowing misa to take full advantage of the opportunity of having you alone for a few minutes. her fingers ghosted over your outer thigh, tracing lazy swirls against your skin. the sensation was subtle but impossible to ignore, sending a warmth through you that you tried to suppress. without making it obvious, you shifted slightly, searching for some kind of friction without the embarrassment of pressing your thighs together too openly.

misa noticed. of course she did. her gaze flickered to yours, amusement dancing behind her dark eyes, an innocent smile curving her lips.

"¿qué?" she asked, lifting her free hand to run her fingers through her hair, a simple movement, yet undeniably sexy.

"nada," you muttered, a shiver running up your spine, making your back arch ever so slightly under her touch. despite the cool breeze, your body was burning.

she chuckled, her fingers pressing just a bit harder against your thigh. "princesa, i’ve barely touched you, and you’re already arching your back?" the innocence in her smile faded into something more knowing, a smirk tugging at her lips.

you shook your head quickly, refusing to give her the satisfaction of knowing exactly how easily she was unraveling you. "it was just a cold shiver… from the, uh, wind," you stammered, though you didn’t even believe your own excuse.

misa’s smirk deepened. "of course, amor. very strange, though, since you’re the only one who felt it." she shrugged, her fingers sliding a little higher, creeping toward your inner thigh. she squeezed lightly, just enough to make your breath hitch. "so this isn’t affecting you at all, then?"

you shook your head, lips pressed together in a weak attempt to maintain composure. speaking would only make it worse.

she studied you for a moment, clearly unconvinced, but before she could push you any further, leila dropped back into her seat beside you.

"here’s your drink!" she grinned, handing it to you.

you took it without hesitation, gulping it down like it was your only lifeline, hoping somehow that the cold liquid would cool the heat surging through you. 

the two spaniards simply laughed at your quick action, “debiste haberla visto, esto va a ser muy fácil” misa spoke proudly, but the spanish was far too advanced and fast for you to understand anything. (you should have seen her, this is going to be so easy)

“mi turno ahora” leila matched misa’s energy, whilst your spanish wasn’t up to their level, you could definitely tell what she meant. (my turn now)

your eyes flickered between the two of them, unsure of what to say or do, completely at their mercy, not that you minded. lying between them, you felt like a toy for them to play with, and the thought alone sent a thrill through you.

leila reached out, her fingers curling around a strand of your hair, twirling it idly before tucking it behind your ear. the simple touch sent warmth down your spine, and before you could stop yourself, you leaned into her hand, craving more. but just as quickly as she granted it, she took it away, her fingers drifting lower.

she traced a slow path from your shoulder, her touch featherlight as it skimmed down your neck, across your collarbone, and to the center of your chest. her hand lingered there for a moment, just long enough to make your breath hitch, before continuing downwards. the soft brush of her fingertips dipped between your breasts, teasingly tugging at the fabric of your bikini top as they passed.

what started as delicate touches turned into something more as her entire palm flattened against your stomach, stopping just before your waistband. every movement set your skin ablaze, the anticipation burning through you as her touch took over your skin. you hadn’t even realized you were holding your breath, too caught up in the way her touch mapped out your body.

something had flipped in leila, her newfound confidence a stark difference from the same person that was stuttering over putting suncream on your back. 

she removed her hand, snapping you out of the bliss that she had effortlessly put you in, her lip tugging at her bottom lip as she looked at you, “you were right misa, she’s so easy”.

you swallowed hard as they talked about you as if you weren’t there, your legs now firmly clenching together as all efforts to withhold the obvious physical effect they had on you had disappeared. 

“easy?” you questioned leila’s words, “i’m not easy” you huffed, somewhat frustrated at the way they perceived you as if you hadn’t turned to putty in their hands in front of their. 

“cari, you’re practically begging for us to touch you, but of course you aren’t easy” leila mocked, pouting at you as she looked down on you.

you scoffed, shifting slightly as if that would somehow ease the tension thrumming through your body. "i don’t beg" you repeated, though the breathiness in your voice betrayed you. "i just know what i want."

leila’s smirk didn’t waver as she dragged a slow finger down your arm. "oh, cariño," she murmured, tilting her head.

"and what is it you want, hmm?" misa spoke, having your head snapping in her direction.

your lips parted, but no words came out at first, your breath unsteady under their piercing gazes. you shifted slightly, heart pounding as your fingers curled into your lap.

"i… i don’t know," you admitted softly, voice barely above a whisper. your body, however, told a different story, silently pleading for them to decide for you.

you watched as they shared a look, “i think we can figure that out” misa hummed in response. 

“we definitely can” leila confirmed with a soft nod, “after we get back to the villa” she added, shattering the hope that had been building in finally getting what you wanted after all the relentless build up you’d been experiencing. 

“why after?” your eyes gave her a pleading look, trying to convince her with just a look was probably hopeless, but it was worth a short. 

“you want us to fuck you on a boat for our friends to see? very brave of you princesa” misa purred, her hand reaching out and tugging on the string of your bikini bottoms ever so slightly. 

your eyes widened as you shook your head slightly, whilst the idea of them touching you here and now was incredible, you knew you wouldn’t be able to stand the endless teasing from your best friend if she saw how you were about to hand yourself over to them on a plate. 

“that’s what we thought” leila smiled, giving the signal to misa to pull on the string, causing it to fall next to you before you gasped and scrambled to retie it, worried that your friends would reappear on the boat any second. 

the two of them stood up, almost as if it was planned, “we are going to eat, are you joining us?” leila asked, nudging her head to the selection of fresh fruit and other snacks that had been catered as per alexia’s request. 

you shook your head politely as you stood to your feet, “i think i need to go for a swim and cool off”.

making your way to the back of the boat, you dived in without hesitation, the water being a desperate relief from the heat still coursing through your body. you wasted no time swimming towards the shore, where jenni and laia had decided that burying alexia in the sand was their newest form of entertainment.

most of the time on the beach was spent in your determined attempt to build a sandcastle without a bucket. every time you took your hands away, laia took it as an open invitation to knock it down, grinning as she ruined your progress. after the third time, you grabbed her ankle, sending her tumbling into the sand with a surprised yelp. the three of you sat giggly as the now incredibly sandy laia sent daggers in your direction.

eventually, the four of you made your way back to the boat, deciding it was time to return to the villa and unwind before getting ready for dinner. the day had been long, the sun still warm against your skin, but the lingering saltwater clinging to your body left you desperate for a shower. 

the moment you stepped inside, you beelined for the bathroom, grateful that your room had an ensuite, no waiting, no interruptions, just the promise of fresh, clean skin. time seemed to slip away as you stood under the spray, letting the heat soothe your muscles and refresh you entirely. by the time you stepped out, your body felt lighter, your damp hair falling in waves down your back as you pulled on a pair of soft shorts and a sports bra to lounge in.

swinging the bathroom door open, you were stopped in your tracks. 

leila and misa were sitting at the edge of your bed, their gazes locked onto you with knowing smirks. your stomach flipped as the memory of what had happened on the boat, the promise from the boat rushing back to your mind.

"you didn’t forget, did you, princesa?" misa’s voice was smooth yet firm, her arms crossed over her chest as she eyed you. the authority in her tone sent goosebumps racing up your arms, a shiver rolling through you as you processed what was happening.

you swallowed, quickly shaking your head. "no, of course not”, you lied. between playing on the beach and the trance-like calm of your shower, the promise they had made had momentarily slipped your mind. however the dull ache between your legs made it clear, it hadn’t forgotten for a second.

leila’s lips curled into a smirk, tilting her head slightly. "of course, amor," she murmured, her voice softer than misa’s but no less commanding. "come here."

the contrast of your predictions between them had your head spinning. leila, the one who would hold you, whisper soft praises against your skin, while misa was rougher, teasing, pushing you past your limits. at least, that’s what you assumed. boy you were wrong. 

hesitantly, you stepped forward, drawn into leila’s presence like she had an invisible pull on you. her hands reached for you instantly, fingers splaying across your waist as she guided you between her legs with ease. the warmth of her touch seeped into your skin, grounding you in the moment.

you were so focused on her that you almost didn’t notice misa standing until she was right behind you. her hands ghosted over your back, fingers tracing absent patterns over the ink etched into your skin. the teasing touch had you holding your breath, until they finally settled on your shoulders, pressing firmly as she began to knead the tension from your muscles.

the sensation had you instinctively tilting your head back, leaving your neck vulnerable, something that misa quickly noticed. her lips brushed against your skin, pressing slow, deliberate kisses that sent a shudder through your entire body. a quiet whimper threatened to escape your lips.

and then there was leila, her hands still moving, still exploring, mapping your body with a featherlight touch that somehow burned hotter than anything. every caress, every whisper of contact sent jolts of electricity through your veins. you were completely at their mercy. and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

your door swung open as laia came rushing it but was instantly stopped in her tracks before she could ask if you wanted to play mario kart on the switch she had bought. she stood rapidly blinking at the sight in front of her, clearly unsure of what to do before turning around and making a clear run for the door. 

“i told you so” she shouted before slamming the door behind her. 

your cheeks flushed red at the slight embarrassment you now felt after your best friend had seen you in this position, but the sets of hands that had taken hold of your body quickly refocused you on the situation that was developing with you at the centre. 

“you ready for some fun, carino?” leila mummered, her gaze locking onto you with a teasing smile

the look in her eyes had you nodding instantly, your breath hitching in anticipation. 

“oh you have no idea” misa whispered against your ear, voice dripping with a mix of mischief and smugness.

a/n - only half proof read, soz x

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Can't Have One Without the Other 5

Warnings: non/dubcon, marital troubles, body insecurity, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Characters: Bucky Barnes

Summary: your marriage is on the rocks.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

Bucky's gone when you wake up. Your heart sinks. Last night was better than the day. Still, you're not reassured. 

You shouldn't feel like this about your husband. You should be happy for him to come home. You should give him a kiss without thinking. He might have been gruff about it, but he was right. 

You drag yourself out of bed. On habit, you grab your phone. You have a message from Nat. 

'Missed you at girls' night. Coffee?' 

You leave her in read. You'll have one before you answer her. You go downstairs and put a mug in the tray. You slip a pod in and hit brew. 

The doorbell chirps, 'visitor at the door.' Great. You already know before you check the camera on the front display. 

You forget that you're in one of Bucky's shirts when you open the door. It's just Nat anyway. Yes, Nat with her svelte waist and perfect hips. 

"So, is that what you're wearing for our coffee date?" She taunts. 

"I just woke up." You turn and let her follow. She's great at inviting herself in. 

"Late night?" She purrs. 

"Got a couple hours," you mutter as you go back to a kitchen. 

"I know you're not drinking that horse piss," she says as she comes up across the arm of the counter. "I'm taking you out for a pistachio latte. Extra cream." 

"Black is fine with me," you take the mug only for it to shatter, the hot coffee splattering across Bucky's shirt. The knife lands at your feet. "Nat!" 

"It's butter knife. Relax." 

"And? You told me once you could kill a man sixteen different ways with one." 

"Oh, I can," she cackles. "Get some pants on. Let's go." 

"Ugh, Nat--" 

"Ugh, you," she hurls back. "He said you were in a mood." 

You flinch, "I am." 

"I always loved that you're a bitch," she snorts. "Get that bouncy booty moving." 

You tilt your head and give her a mean look, "look who the fuck talking, bitch." 

She laughs. You do too. She can be terrible but she's too cool for you.

"Yeah, give me a minute." 

You go to get yourself together. That coffee would have helped a whole lot. You'll manage. 

You get dressed and clean up. You come back down. The kitchen floor is clean, the broken cup cleared away. Bucky always said Nat was good at getting rid of messes. 

"Fine, let's go. I'm cutting back on the cream though." 

"Coulda fooled me," she scoffs. 

"Nat," you chide again. 

"What? I'm sure Bucky can't get enough... since you got more than plenty to give." 

"Shut up." 

"Well, if you wanna do something about it, you can always take up sparring again." 

"And get my ears boxed in by a trained assassin, fun." You roll your eyes and go out into the entrywau. 

"You get your back blown by one," she retorts over your shoulder. You shoot her the finger. Sometimes you forget that about Bucky. How dangerous he really can be. 

💍

You take Nat up on her invitation. Both of them. After the calorie-loaded latte, you let her take you to the compound for a workout. It’s been a while. Too long. 

Since the wedding, you just kind fell off everything. That was three years ago.  You just never got back on it. There was always something else. 

When you wanted to read, Bucky wanted to talk. When you wanted to try that new game you bought, he wanted to go out for dinner. Whenever you wanted anything, he had the perfect distraction. Just like last night. 

You should feel better. That’s what you keep arguing with yourself. You’re losing that battle along with the one with Nat. She knocks you off your feet and the air rushes out of you on impact. 

You never beat her. Never even came close. You’re not a mercenary, or a soldier, or an assassin. You’re not one of them. You’re just you and you’re starting to think that’s not enough. 

You stay on the mat. She steps over you and offers her wrapped hand. You take it and let her pull you to sitting. You wave her off as she sets her feet. 

“No more.” 

“You’re conditioning is shit,” she drops down across from you, draping her arms over her knees. “I thought he’d keep you in peak shape.” 

“Nat,” you shake your head. 

“Okay, I get it. Soft spot. What’s the matter? You and the doofus not fucking?” 

You sigh, “no, we did. Last night. It was...” You shrug. 

“Wow, sounds amazing,” she says dryly. 

“It could have been. He was away a whole month.” 

“I thought you’d be drooling,” she chuckles. “When you were dating, I remember him pinning you on this very mat.” 

“Yeah, well... he couldn’t even pick up the phone the whole time he was gone.” You stare down at your thighs. You lean back and feel your bloat. “Ugh, I’m not even mad about it. How can I blame him? Look at me.” 

“But last night?” She argues. 

“Yeah, last night, with the lights off, as I tried to pretend I was anyone else,” you exhale and look away. “Nat, I should be crying about this. I’m not. I can’t.” 

“Have you talked to him?” 

You give her a look. 

“Right. Talk to Bucky. Good luck.” 

You chew your lip and finally your heart decides to kick up. Your stomach churns. You look at her as a wrinkle lines your forehead. 

“What?” She urges. 

You scrunch up your lips. Just say it. Say it and it’ll sound so stupid you’ll know it’s wrong. 

“I think maybe... maybe it’s not going to work. Maybe...” you push your shoulders up. “Maybe I should look into lawyers.” 

“Divorce?” She gasps. 

You nod. It makes sense actually. You thought you’d take it back the minute it met the air. For once, you think you might be right. What did she always say? Trust your gut. 

[wlwsoccerfics]

Overwhelmed (MackenzieArnoldXArnoldReader)

Warnings: mentions of Traumatic brain injury, stutter

summary: you had a Traumatic brain injury because of being hit by a car two years ago. Since the accident you have a stutter & working on getting back to your old self. Your Mom is trying her best to support your journey as you try to get back onto the pitch with the Matildas, having already returned to Pitch for your Club the Portland Thorns FC.

You were 21 years old now. It was your time to return to the Matildas . Having seen your name on the call up Sheet had surprised alot of Fans. But alot of them were super supportive.

First one to greet you when you arrived at Camp with your Mom was Kyra. She hugged you and you hugged her back.

"y/n, so happy to have you back, rumor has it you are joining Arsenal this summer." She said, you were quite surprised that she knew you had an offer. Your contract with the Portland Thorns FC was ending this Summer and even though you fought your way back onto the pitch your quality of Play was still so impressive that you got offers from Fc Bayern Munich, Arsenal, Real Madrid among others. Right now you had no idea how you would decide on where to go, but you had a secret favorite at the moment. Altough there was a team that had a really tempting Argument to go there. Because your girlfriend was playing there. It wasn't the same one as the one you were currently eyeing with.

"w-we w-w-will s-see." You replied with a smile. Hugging her back.

"Arsenal has so many tempting features. I mean i am Here! So are Steph and Caitlin!" Kyra stated. You smiled at that.

"i-i k-k-ke-keep that in mind."you let her know.

"little pest, maybe let little Arnold breathe!" Steph said and she walked over to you giving both you and your Mom a hug.

"hey Steffy!"you stammer out, offering her a smile.

"hey kiddo!" She said and smiled back.

"nice to have you back!" Steph told you.

"n-n-nice t-to be b-back!" You admitted.

"i am proud of you, Kid. We all are!" Mini stated as she walked over with Harper. The little Girl raced over and into your Arms. You picked her up.

"t-thanks Mini!" You stuttered out. Smiling at her. "Hi h-harps!" You told the little Girl in your Arms.

"hi y/n! good that you are back, i missed you lots. Camp is way more fun with you!" She informed you. You let out a soft giggle.

"m-missed you t-too." You let her know. Kissing her head.

"i saw a picture of you and your girlfriend. She is very pretty!" Harper let you know.

"i th-think s-so too!" You said and blushed softly.

"she plays football as well. Right? What's her Name?" The little girl asked.

"y-yes a-and h-her n-na-name is Lea. Sh-she pl-lays for b-bayern m-munich." You explained.

"that's in Germany." She said and you nodded your head softly in agreement. You started to get a little overwhelmed with all the talking. And Mini could tell so could your Mom.

"okay harps let's give y/n a little break. We need to put our stuff into our room." Your Mom said softly. You sat Harper down.

"See you later!" She said and waved at you and your Mom. You two waved back before walking to your room with your Mom.

When you reached it you walked inside. Placing your Suitecase and bag aside, taking your shoes of and lying down on your bed. Breathing in and out slowly.

Your Mom sat down on the bed and gently stroked your back. She frowned when she noticed the tears on your face.

"y/n, hey please look at me." Your Mom said and you turned to fully look at her.

"m-maybe i shouldn't return just yet. It's overwhelming." You stammered out.

"Love you went through so much. And Had to Fight for things. You have come so far, If you really don't feel ready then that's okay. What you accomplished is already impressive!" She let you know. Seeing everyone was so nice and you want to get back on the pitch but things sure were intense for you. So you felt overwhelmed. You were about to say something in return when your Phone rang. You quickly pulled it out of the Pocket of your jeans.

"it it is l-lea." You told your Mom.

"i will give you some space and Go find Caitlin!" Your Mom answered and walked out of the room. You answered the face time call.

"hi love, are you okay? You look like you have been crying." Your girlfriend stated.

"h-hi b-babe, j-just g-got overwhelmed." You stammered out. Sniffling softly.

"that i understand. Sometimes even i get overwhelmed without what you fight every day. And i am proud of you for everything you have accomplished. You already play for your Club again and If this Camp is too overwhelming you can try another time to Play for your country. Or not play for the Tillies at all. Altough i know you talk about it alot. And have passion for it. It's always okay to Change your mind!" Lea told you. You and Lea met five months ago, during vacation in italy. You knew who she was and she knew who you were before. But she has met you with your stutter and never cared about that. She fell in love with you anyways.

"i th-think it m-might be m-more all t-the t-talking i have to do." You admitted.

"oh, babe are you insecure about your speech?" Your girlfriend asked.

"y-yes!" You said softly.

"y/n, my love. people who judge you are stupid and don't deserve to be in your Life! Same goes for people making fun of you! I mean you are amazing in every way." She let you know and offered you a soft smile. You smiled back slightly. Your girlfriends voice was very calming right now. It helped you feel less overwhelmed. You talked for a few more minutes before ending the call. You put on a Training Kit cause you would start practice tonight.

Your Mom returned to the room a little while later.

"how was the Talk with Lea?" She wanted to know.

"g-good. sh-she helped me with my feelings." You explained.

"glad to hear that." She answered and pulled you into a hug. You hugged your mom back.

"t-teammeeting soon." You replied.

"yes you are right. Let's go " your Mom said.

In the meeting room with your teammates and the staff, you sat in between your Mom and Steph. Steph was one of many people that stood by you while you got injured and helped you through it. She was like an aunt to you.

"you okay, kiddo?" She asked.

"j-just a b-b-it stressed." You admitted.

"about what? Playing again?" Steph wanted to know. Gently squeezing your shoulder.

"t-talking to p-people. in-interviews and st-stuff l-like th-that. W-worried th-they make f-fun o-off me." You explained. You did give a few Interviews after your Injury and for your Club. But those were mostly sit down Interviews and you had time to prepare a bit. Interviews for The national Team were a totally different Story. The audiance and Media interest was so much bigger.

"we will always be there to Support you! You got this! You accomplished so much." She let you know. During the team meeting everyone was telling you they would always support you and showed how proud and loved you were.

You practiced together that day and all day the next day before you made your debut after the accident. Playing your first 45 minutes for the Tillies. The Fans supported you and the Interview after the Game was great as well. Steph was next to you as the Team captain and you two worked well Together. Of course they would always be people on the Internet with Bad comments but everyone you Loved and that loved you made sure you focused on the good comments. And not on the few mean ones.

[typingtess]

Deeks and Rosa were sitting in a waiting room while Rosa's immigration lawyer was dealing with some paperwork snafu before her interview with her immigration case worker. Deeks was in a suit and tie, Rosa in a lovely blue Calvin Klein dress Kensi found on sale at Macy's. Kensi was at Camp Pendleton testifying in a trial. She was waiting for his text.

"I found your wedding album while I was helping Kensi cleaning her box called 'stuff'," Rosa told Deeks as they waited.

"Our anniversary is next week. It's good to know it survived the move two-years ago."

"That's why Kensi was cleaning up her 'stuff' boxes in the garage. Part of her anniversary gift to you."

"Part?" Deeks was really interested now. "Oh, tell me the other part. I can fake being surprised."

"Where's the fun in that? Just be surprised."

"Please." Deeks pled.

"No. I'm staying out of this."

"You're in. You know what Kensi is getting me, tell me and we're all even."

"To be even, you'd have to tell me what you're getting Kensi."

"Well, it's a surprise." And Rosa was a part of part of it. He booked a Mother's Day spa weekend at Two Bunch Palms in Palm Springs for Kensi and Rosa. He also got the annual Moshe call after Valentine's Day with a good price for some piece of jewelry that didn't move. This year it was dangly earrings with diamonds. "So if you won't share, you'll get nothing and like it."

"'Caddyshack'."

"See, you are catching up on all the good movies. Next Friday, I say we do 'Clueless'."

"I wouldn't mind watching 'Bend Like Beckham' again."

"Again? You have it on Hulu all the time."

"Because it's great."

"You'll like 'Clueless'. Kensi loves 'Clueless'."

"The way she loves '13 Going on 30'?" Rosa asked.

"Kensi doesn't love anything the way she loves '13 Going on 30'."

"That's not true, she loves you more than that movie," Rosa had a big smile. "She showed me all the pictures in the wedding album. Told me about what happened that day."

"It was a day."

"She looked beautiful. You looked handsome in your tuxedo. Mandy was so pregnant."

"The only weird thing that didn't happen in that wedding and reception was Mandy going into labor. She held that off for three more days."

"Why did your Mom wear black?"

"It was a much better dress than the purple one she originally bought. Deep v-neck, open back and the dress ended about halfway down her thigh. It was a lot."

"Julia looked beautiful."

"Yes she did. Not as beautiful as her daughter…"

"Did you know you'd always marry her?"

"No, we needed to work through some things but once we did, I knew she was my last girlfriend and my only wife."

"That's romantic in a very strange way."

"Please put that on my tombstone, 'He was romantic in a very strange way.'"

"Don't talk like that." Rosa looked at her hands for a second. "Do you think Gregory can fix the paperwork problems."

"I haven’t heard any yelling so Gregory is likely making progress." Deeks saw Gregory T. Coates III, immigration lawyer to the stars who does some pro-bono work for Los Angeles uniformed services members, military and those involved in education, making a bee-line to them.

"Those fu…..fools finally got the paperwork right," Gregory said as he sat next to Rosa. "Your interview will start in a few minutes. All the letters of recommendation are in, your school records are up to date, including your first round of SATs. You're in a very good place, Rosa. Go in, be yourself, be calm and remember, Kensi, Marty and I are all here to fight for you. You be you and you'll be great, kid."

"Thank you," Rosa smiled.

"You," he pointed to Deeks. "Keep your mouth shut. It's her show. You answer questions directly asked to you. Don't be cute, don't be funny, don't be…"

"Don't be me." Deeks was not offended.

"You can be you the minute this is over and you're taking me to dinner."

"Rosa Diaz," an assistant walked up to the three of them. "We're ready for you."

Deeks gave Rosa a peck on the cheek. "And you're ready for them." The three walked to the interview room with the assistant. Deeks didn't think he'd spend the Friday before his anniversary in an immigration office but there was no place else he'd rather be.

It’s a love s t o r y! - Densi Wedding

ncisla

[icarus-last-fall]

Wolfstar fic recs

I made a poll a while (r: an eternity) ago and you voted for a wolfstar rec list so here it is!

A few notes before we start: all the fics are on ao3, most of them are one-shots and there's no smut

Any fic written by @engie-ivy (ao3 here)

Yes I am recommending a writer. The other recs will be individual fics but it was either that or listing all of their fics.

Literally the best wolfstar writer believe me

(ik I'm not giving you lots of information but just check out their ao3 it takes two seconds and I promise it'll be worth it)

Just like best friends do by MsAlexWP (3k words)

Summary: After uselessly pining for three years Remus decides, finally, to get Sirius out of his system by shagging as many blokes as he can. It doesn’t go quite as planned.

Ugh I love it. The pining, the jealousy... I don't have a lot to say about it but trust me it is good.

Hoax (wolfstar's version) by mhiiiaka (6k)

Summary:

"I never said that!" 

"You didn't have to, because you never said anything else either!" 

***

Or, in which Remus Lupin doesn't believe Sirius Black actually wants him, even though they've been snogging each other senseless for months. And now, there's someone else interested in Remus and Sirius can't bring himself to use his fucking words.

Honestly who doesn't love a little 'didn't know they were dating'.

The angst in this is Pure. Fucking. Gold. It makes me scream every time I reread it (which happens often)

Remus Lupin is the number one James Potter cosplayer by fishflipperfan (8k)

Summary:

“I’m Sirius. You are James, aren’t you?”

Remus, still slackjawed and speechless, managed a tentative nod of affirmation.

He was fucked.

OR

James has promised to be in two places at once and needs somebody to cover for his blind date. Remus is a pushover. His one task is to get rejected. What he doesn't anticipate is meeting Sirius Black-- beautiful, incomprehensible, and impossible to say no to.

Based on the youth of may premise but without any of the sadness and considerably more dumb.

I don't read a lot of first meetings but this one is so so good. It's also really funny!

That's different, then by my_castlescrumbling (2k)

Summary: "The day that James Potter told Sirius Black he no longer fancied Lily Evans, the entire world changed." - Sirius thinks James likes Remus...how long will it take him to figure out that's NOT true? Just a fun, sweet, misunderstanding with a happy ending, folks. Wolfstar and Jegulus for the soul.

Mainly Sirius and James friendship + Sirius being an idiot. I laughed so much reading it.

Is this a prank? by mhiiiaka (6k)

Summary:

“But you’d also be that gorgeous professor that even the janitors had the hots for,” Sirius said softly with a smirk. He knew it wasn’t very wise to ruin the moment like that, he knew Remus would probably stand up and run away.

Which is why he was so taken aback when Remus slipped on a sly smile and leaned in too. They were close, Sirius could count every freckle on his delicate skin. Christ, he was beautiful.

“Yeah? I didn’t know you wanted to pursue a career as a janitor, Sirius.”

***

Or, in which Sirius Black decides to flirt his way into Remus' heart, but he didn't expect Remus to flirt back.

Remus flirting back and Sirius having a full-on crisis is one of the greatest tropes and mhiiiaka writes it so well.

The Truth in the Dare by Marie_Thomas (5k)

Summary: Remus has no idea why the Gryffindors always dare Sirius to snog him every time James, Peter and Sirius play Truth or Dare. Yet for some reason, he can't bring himself to complain about it.

Really cute fic and I love the plot idea.

The Art of Gift Giving by my_castlescrumbling (600 words)

Summary: But the next night, when he said to Sirius, heart beating nervously, "My quill broke yesterday. My favorite one," he was half-hoping not to find the stunning, gold-plated quill he saw on his pillow the next day. Because he knew what that meant. - Remus is getting gifts from a secret admirer, and he's pretty sure he knows who it is.

Really short but so sweet I love it.

Side note: @my-castles-crumbling writes a lot of microfics on Tumblr and they're all amazing

Chef was cute, would eat here again by her_smile_forges_galaxies (5k)

Summary: Sirius is used to critics visiting his restaurant, but when the most beautiful man he's ever seen sits down, he's faced with what should be an impossible decision... the hope of a date, or a good review?

Really, it isn't even a question.

I said I didn't do first meetings, yet here's another one... I honestly don't know what to say except that this fic is amazing.

With my corkscrew hair by weeb_grass (6k)

Summary:

“It's nothing! I just— Well, what James said earlier, y'know, about not taking the potion because it wouldn't work on him. He wasn't exactly lying. If he truly loves me—” here, her cheeks begin to fill again, “—then the potion really wouldn't work on him.”

Or:

Does amortentia work if you're already in love with the potion's brewer?

I always love an amortentia fic but the originality of the plot makes it even better.

And that's it! Hope you like those fics :)

I'll probably make another poll to ask which ship I should do next but don't hesitate to request a rec list!

[myotherblogforrin]

First Meeting

(Rin has been online gaming with reader for a year. Reader streams horror game play at night after day job). Aged up 23-24.

QueenVeronicaXV: wrw goin 2 meet up?

Soccerboy1234: U ever been 2 a football game live?

QueenVeronicaXV: Avoiding the ??? No. Only on tv when Beckham played.

Soccerboy1234: lol. Sent u smth. chk ur mail. gtg.

You let out a sigh, wondering when or if you'd ever meet your gaming buddy. It wasn't like you did this all the time, but ever since you two teamed up on a RE6 run last year, you'd found him a lot of fun to play with.

You had to go down to the entrance of your apartment building where security waved you over.

"Good timing, L/N. A special courier delivered this package five minutes ago."

"Really?"

You took the box and opened it at the desk, surprised when you saw a jersey with the name Itoshi on the back and the number 10. Beneath the brand new jersey was an envelope and inside a pair of VIP passes as well as tickets for a game.

"If you don't want those, I'll take 'em." Kai teased.

"Well, if you want to go with me as my bodyguard..."

"Done. Who do you know that sent you this?" Kai asked.

"A gaming buddy. Must have connections, but he's never mentioned it. Just said to go check my mail."

You pulled out the card, the handwriting perfectly legible.

**Bring a friend. Lets meet after the game.**

"That's a good buddy. I'll meet you here in the lobby and we'll go straight to the stadium. It's going to be fun," Kai winked.

Back in your apartment, you couldn't stop smiling, holding the box with the jersey and the card. You signed back on and messaged your gaming buddy. You only knew his first name. Rin.

QueenVeronicaXV: Kai is g2b my bodyguard :) shld I look up Itoshi?

You sat in your gaming chair, not expecting to hear back from Rin tonight. All the sudden a message popped up.

Soccerboy1234: No. ull c him play. Calling u.

You pulled your headset off, unable to quell the excitement bursting forth. The two of you had exchanged numbers six months ago, but only texted. Taking a deep breath you answered on the third ring.

"Hello?"

Rin knew what you sounded like because he watched your streams. It had taken him a bit to realize you were his gaming buddy, but once he did, he let you know your secret was safe.

"Hi. I will meet you after the game, but keep your phone on you."

"Why are you being so mysterious about this? We could just meet at a cafe or something."

"No."

"Wait. We've talked about this guy before. Rin Itoshi. You two have the same first name, but do you know him or something? Is that why we're meeting at the game? You want to introduce me to some soccer star?"

Rin could barely contain his amusement, but did because he couldn't wait to see the surprise when you finally found out who he was.

"Yes."

You went extremely quiet and that forced Rin to stand, his nerves on high alert. The last thing you ever were was quiet. Was his plan already falling apart.

"I want to meet you. Not a celebrity. You don't have to impress me, Rin. I already like you."

Rin's stomach dropped. How could you say those things so easily and not realize the effect that had on him? You were so sincere and genuine at all times. It was one of the reasons he liked you. Of course, only as a friend, nothing more, but he liked you.

"Just wear the jersey and keep your phone close."

"Okay."

"I'll see you then."

"Bye."

Rin hung up quickly, letting out a loud, long breath. Sitting on the edge of his bed, he wondered if you would be disappointed or happy when you met him.

[cacaocheri]

my summary of art for this year!!!! sun fnaf showed up TWICE this year (again) 😭😭😭😭😭 literally ever since i joined the dca fandom hes shown up twice per year in my summaries i think its really funny

[tblsomedoodles]

I don't even really go here anymore but my friend does and she said 'keith as the Red Queen' from Alice in Wonderland and i wasn't able to put the pen down until i drew this dumbass.

i spent far too much time on that stupid throne just for that stupid cape to cover half of it.

[sugarsnappeases]

thank you for the tag @fxreflyes this is so cute, except the format is trying to hinder my propensity to ramble, so i’ve rectified this in the tags lmao

i’m over 5'5 / i wear glasses or contacts / i have blonde hair / i often wear sweatshirts / i prefer loose clothing over tight clothes / i have one or two piercings / i have at least one tattoo / i have blue eyes / i have dyed or highlighted my hair / i have or have had braces / i have freckles / i paint my nails / i typically wear makeup / i don’t often smile / resting bitch face / i play sports / i play an instrument / i know more than one language / i can cook or bake / i like writing / i like to read / i can multitask / i’ve never dated anyone / i have a best friend i’ve known for over five years / i am an only child

no pressure tags for @static-radio-ao3 @inevitablestars @itsjaywalkers @carniferous @orbitfalls @transsexualpriest @futurequibblerjournalist <333

[batfamfucker]

Appreciation post for 'girly girl' characters and/or shows that celebrate traditionally feminine things that girls and women are shamed for.

Characters on this list that love makeup, fashion, hair, etc. Characters that are still written as strong, intelligent, brave, etc. That told young girls that these interests are valid, they are not lesser interests. Being feminine and liking traditionally feminine things does not make them weak.

[skrunksthatwunk]

stole this chart from @asubakaa and spent wayyy too much time making my own so. yeah. also i did 6 instead of 5 bc i know no restraint

[ceramicbeetle]

officially 10K into this fic and having a realization about where I'm at on characterization so far, so i'm wondering:

[heartshattering]

5 AM

Just me and my overactive mind facing the nighttime again 🙃

[a-little-monotonous]

he's going to kick out that guy's knees (chip doesnt wanna get involved)

[nomaishuttle]

i do fr need to work on differentiating between "actually middleclass" and "doesnt live paycheck to paycheck" lmao bc that is something i struggle with... obviously ik i have more in common with like. even somebody whos fr middleclass disney vacations every year. I know i have more in common with them than i do with bezos but god at least i dont have to see bezos being annoying in front of me every day KJANDJKLNLJD