#but yeah... it's felt

[bloggingboutburgers]

Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with valuing platonic relationships, currently questioning if I’m aspec and maybe aro( I haven’t put much thought yet) but I get annoyed when I would be talking to one of my guy friends in school and there would sometimes be someone saying “ you two make such a cute couple “ and that would annoy me because if I see as a friend… I see them as a friend and at most it would be a sibling like bond or if someone asked me a NSFW question I would feel so awkward about it and lowkey feel repulsed about the idea of friendship going anywhere beyond platonic, at this point it might as well be a sign, but honestly I would prefer platonic relationships any day and I fail to understand why people find it so baffling why some people don’t care if someone’s “hot” or something

You and me both TwT Since I don't understand romance I'd kinda tend to have that knee-jerk reaction when someone is like "you two make a cute couple" of "WHOA we have a good thing going here don't go ruining that with couple projection"... Let alone NSFW questions, you'd think people would mind their own business, but it's surprising how often they just don't.

Of course I guess now the waters are muddied for me since I'm in a QPR, and I do use the word "couple" liberally to talk about us in the tags, but... I think what helps is that I know the nature of our relationship and I can rest easy in the security that it'll never be what people project it to be. In a way it's kind of a "couple-passing friendship" or something. Not even sure to this day what I should be comfortable with in the way people perceive it, but my loved ones tend to understand the whole thing better than I thought they would which is pretty damn cool

[mausolealdrift]

its baffling seeing people on here being all shocked about how other ppl didnt have sex or do drugs or drink or go to parties etc etc in high schools like. sorry i was too busy getting bullied to do all of that stuff i guess. why are you surprised that there’s losers on the cringe loser website

[akkpipitphattana]

i’ll never understand people who can’t make fun of their faves a little. like yes i love this character and would defend them to my grave but also they’re stupid sometimes and they do dumb things and imma make fun of them for it

[inkskinned]

you're in the habit of denying yourself things.

if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.

but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?

what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.

and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.

you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.

so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.

it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.

sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.

oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.

[alaraxia]

needless to say the vibes were in shambles

[ophanim-vesper]

A short-ish fancomic poem thing about my hc for Zelda

(best read from left to right)

[newttxt]

crisis of disbelief

[zipsunz]

little miss fool 🎀🌙

[foldingfittedsheets]

So one thing I’ve noticed is that people’s DnD characters may vary but there is usually an underlying thread that they all have in common. This thread is typically related to what that person struggles with the most.

For instance, my betrotheds DnD characters: a bitchy warlock we had to bust out of two different pacts, a sassy barbarian, a reformed drow cultist, and a sunshine fighter cleric.

All these characters were wildly different but at their very core struggle was them grappling with their self worth. My betrothed struggles with their worth a great deal and even with different facets showing their characters all have that too.

Mine all tend to contend with different themes of loneliness and acceptance. Surprise, surprise, the little autistic gremlin yearns to have been met with more love and lasting friendships.

So we’re at breakfast. I am meeting a new friend of my betrotheds for the first time. It’s been twenty minutes since I’ve met this man. I say my theory. He laughs. He starts to describe a few of his characters but specifies that he often has healing aspects. He gives a very broad overview of their character arcs.

I ponder for a moment then said, “Would you like to have my assessment?”

He laughed, “Sure!”

“We’ve just met. It’s gonna get real.”

“Bring it on.”

“I think your struggle is that you feel you must offer something of value or service to people to be worthy of their love.”

His jaw dropped. His fork froze midway to his mouth. A potato fell. He stared into space as this sank in. Quietly he said, “Oh.”

[egophiliac]

was gonna wait 'til I'd done all the poms, but it's been a day, so have Vil with a Salazzle 🍎

[ofswordsandpens]

percy, mentally ill: I feel like I deserve to die. It's a punishment because im a horrible person. Does that sound crazy?

jason, also mentally ill: No that tracks bro samesies

[emeraldsummers]

Sometimes I remember that the only reason Cas is canonically a weirdo even by angel standards is just because Misha, the first onscreen angel, made the acting choice to portray angels as inhuman and eerie, and then all of the subsequent angel actors just ignored that and portrayed the angels as regular people.

[anqelbean]

I feel like Shen Yuan doesn't really understand the concept of "faking your death", because faking your death doesn't include actually dying.

[bloggingboutburgers]

This gig is doing wonders for my self-esteem related to my age tbh

[gemisbored]

deepnest.jpg

[aaronwarner]

Maxton Hall: The World Between Us

S01E03: Exposed