#but yeah part 3!! whooooo!!!

[mistresseast]

Mirror Stage

Part 3 of Liminality, a NG+ AU with a twist.

After the nightmare of the first Liminal, Akira is physically, emotionally, and mentally drained. With a newfound understanding of the true danger he faces on his mission, he finds himself regretting his past decision to get Akechi involved, terrified of losing him again. Meanwhile, life goes on, the gossip surrounding Akira is still rampant, and his friend group is steadily growing, leaving Akira with no choice but to try to keep up, all while haunted by his Shade’s final, ominous words.

Determined to avoid Akechi for his own safety and desperate to do everything right this time, Akira struggles against a combination of new and old threats; however, Akechi isn’t the type to just stand aside, and when Akira gets in way over his head, they’ll have to learn to trust each other or face an abrupt and premature end to this entire story.

Updates Saturdays. COMPLETE.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 |

Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10

(art by @tratatdragonlord)

[sparrow-the-tired-lesbian]

AWE YEAH ITS SSSSO SILLy!

I was new to my school last year, and from the moment I showed up, he hated me. He immediately asked me what I played, and when I told him both alto and bari sax, he got mad, and said "ugh, why can't you play trombone?!"

I don't like tooting my own horn, but I am a good player. I started playing in 6th grade, made my county's honor band in 7th grade, got straight superiors on my groups ensemble for the solo and ensemble thingy majig in 7th grade, and was too scared to do ANYTHING in 8th, which is the year I had him. I know what I'm doing when I'm given my instrument, and I am an advanced player. I know that, but I hate saying it.

I told him all of this. I prepared a piece of music to play for him and show him my skill set. I wanted us to have a decent relationship, as music is so very important in my life. I wanted the harder parts of the music.

I was picked on by my bandmates for that piece, coz some little dirt bag kid questioned my abilities...ON MY FIRST DAY, and I layed into him. The whole class laughed. It sucked.

He took the prepared music and mocked me for it, joking about how "oh no, pansy isn't here, guess SHE can't play it for us." He would call me out in front of the class for messing up on something. He knew the other band members would pick on me and mock me for my style, and my hair, and and and. He saw it happen. He never did a thing.

I would play something perfectly for him? He'd roll his eyes and move on to his favorite students, and praise them for their every move. He pulled me aside once, and told me to not be so...distracting when I play.

When I play, the music takes hold of me. I sway with it. On crescendos, I rise a bit to help show shaping. I dance when I play.

I wasn't allowed to do that.

My music felt dull, and lifeless.

My current band teacher couldn't be any more different! He is wonderful! He has told me PERSONALLY, multiple times, that I have a talent. He uses me for demonstrations. The first compliment on my music from a teacher in over a year was from him. You know what he told me?

"Pansy? That was one of the best tone qualities I have ever heard. That's a hard note for an alto, and you played it beautifully. Well done. I'm very proud of you!"

I had a whole stim attack. It was magical. He has never doubted my playing abilities once, and I have grown much more in 3 months than I did in that whole year with the other guy.

I almost quit band because of him. But I found joy in my music and my instrument again. I found a band that accepts me for me, and sees me as a member.

ANY WHOOOOO THANK YOU FOR READING THAT SILLY THING AHAHHA

That first band teacher can feel my wrath I am SHAKING with frustration at this dickhead

new band teacher has my seal of approval tbh :)

[padfootastic]

hiii i had a question - how do you think other people saw sirius? like at his time at hogwarts, what was his reputation like? what impression did he give off? and also i feel like there are a lot of parallels between bella and sirius, and so what do you think their similarities and differences are? anyway sorry for the word vomit and the wildly contrasting questions

hello <3 do not worry, friend, here at padfootastic’s blog we specialise in word vomit. ur amongst ur own here ;)

for the first part, i swear my opinion on this has changed so much recently since i started leaning into the cold, arrogant Black heir type characterisation for sirius as well as looking at the black family as a bit more like,,,royalty among the WW type thing ykno?

so i think that all wizard raised kids have at least heard about the black family, mostly as a cautionary tale, almost always in tones of reverent fear/awe, and sometimes incredulously—sirius black, therefore, would’ve come into hogwarts with a lot of expectations/eyes on him. he almost immediately bucks all of it with his gryffindor sorting but people are still wary (bc the WW is so essentialist) so i think that like—lingering hesitance would’ve followed him throughout the 7 years, something sirius would be very conscious of too.

i’m also of the opinion that the black kids all received like,,,etiquette training and pureblood lessons etc etc so they all have a poker face/mask that they use in public as well as being learnt how to control their emotions (think fanon legilimency) and sirius tended to default to that, which ended up making people nervous.

so, basically, he gave off the impression that he was better than everyone else (he was); thought himself superior (lowkey yes but he was working on unlearning that, promise); didn’t care for the general public (absolutely true); and was a bit of a terrifying bastard who never got close enough to most people to dispel rumours/legends ykno?

(and ik i keep banging on this like a dead horse, but i think that most people, including those who knew him, were also a bit wary of his ~dark side bc of his upbringing and family’s actions wrt voldy. like, even remus and peter, on some level had that in the back of their mind. it was only james who never ever held it against him or treated it like an innate part of him/a flaw)

re bella & sirius, whooooo. i’m rly not a bella expert (that’s @narcissa-black-supermacy and i would love to hear ur thoughts on this, dani) but let’s see:

- both of them r very intense, very passionate people. translates into extreme, almost unhealthy loyalty for the people they choose as their own. also makes them very entrenched in & involved with whatever they choose to do- like bella being a death eater, and sirius being a part of the order/harry’s godfather etc etc.

- i think both of them were great at magic, on an intuitive level. like, it’s one thing to work hard at it, but for these, magic was like an extension of their hand, not a tool. this made them terrifying in battles and displays of power bc they just had. so much potential. (duels b/w bella & sirius were also some of the most explosive & entertaining)

- very arrogant, very ‘most people r sheep, and we’re better than them’ (which is almost a Black prerequisite, ik ik) and i can totally see them hanging out just to sneer at people lol

- also this is v random but both bella and sirius lowkey give me aromantic vibes? like, they don’t much care for romance or relationships as much as they do about a cause/person/dynamic, yeah?

for their differences, hm. i actually think those two were much more similar than not (being firstborn heirs) but i really think bella’s morality was way more skewed than sirius’, for one. also think she defaults to magic/violence/physical fights in disagreements whereas sirius prefers using his words. i don’t think i can ever see bellatrix like, slumming it, ykno? she grew up with the finest and she’s very happy to continue using it. sirius, on the other hand, takes it almost as a way to be rebellious and doesn’t mind living minimal & using whatever.

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

I JUST FINISHED EPISODE EIGHT AND AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

I LOVED IT SOOOOO MUCH 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰!!!!

OKAY FIRST OF ALL ISAAACCCCC MY BOYYY 🥰🥰🥰😭❤️❤️. He's been going through it but AAAHHHHH HE GRABBED THE ASEXUAL BOOK!!! I am so proud of him 🥰🥰🥰 though sir did you steal that- anyway he is in fact the most adorable ever and I love him with my whole heart 🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️ <3333 :)) :DD!!! He <33.

TAO AND ELLE ARE SO ADORABLEEE!!!! AND ELLE'S GOING TO LAMBERT :'DDD!!! AND ALSO THEY'RE OFFICIALLY BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND!!!!!! WHOOOOO :'DDDD 🥳🥳🥳🎉🎊!!! AND WHEN THEY FIRST SAW EACH OTHER FOR PROM 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ STOP I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰. Also their dancing SLAYED like yes they were holding up the dance floor out there 😌 (I think one of them said something like that to one of them but if not eh I still say it lol). And their pictures 🥰🥰. So cute <3. Also poor Tao trying to read her dad xD. But yeah love them so much <3333.

MY TEACHERSSSS!!!! MY TEACHER BABEYSSSS!!!! MR. AJAYI AND MR. FAROUK :'DDDDD!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭😭❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰. ALSO THE SCENE OF THE COUCH (SINGH?) TELLING HIM TO INVITE HIM SLFJGHDKHLS LOVELY. Speaking of though is every teacher at this school gay xD. Like I don't mind it at all but xD- anyway they are in fact THE most adorable <333. Also SO glad they're slightly more functional than our teenagers (though tbh who knows if it's because they're adults) and didn't just go "oh yeah :')" about it being something they shouldn't have done lol. But AAHHHH he invited him out :'D and AAAHHHHHH they're so cute 🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️😭❤️❤️. Good crying, lol <3. I love them your honor :)).

IMOGENNN :OOO??! MY GIRL!! ARE YOU CRUSHING ON SAHAR?? :DDD?? Either way love you girl happy for you over all 🥰🥰🥰. Hope you do find someone if you want though :)) ❤️❤️❤️🥰. Love her <3.

Also I know we barely saw her but Tori always so hard 😌😌😌. As always, lol xD. I love her so much <333. Just- HER <333 🥰🥰❤️😭. Good tears xD :)).

TARA AND DARCY MY BABES 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️. POOR TARA THE WHOLE DAY WAITING FOR DARCY AND WORRYING ABOUT HER 😭😭😭💔❤️. AND POOR DARCY OF COURSE ALONE AND LITERALLY SLEEPING AT A PARK 😭😭😭😭💔💔❤️. But then her finally showing up :')). BUT TARA HAVING GONE TO FIND HER 😭😭😭❤️❤️. I cry because they love each other so much and she wanted to make sure Darcy was okay but also because they missed each other xd. And VJEUANDPK DARCY'S MOMMMM- I AM READY TO KILL AND MAIM THANK YOU <3333. READY TO MURDER HER!! <3333. Poor Darcy 😭❤️. But their conversation :')). I feel so bad for her 😭 honey she LOVES you, no matter what <333. You're going through a lot and I'm sure this new part of your life (for her) is gonna take some getting used to but you love each other and you can always count on each other :')). And AAAHHHHH ALL THOSE "I LOVE YOU"S 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️😭😭❤️. GOOD CRYING DON'T WORRY :'DDD. Y'ALL I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰. T h e m <333.

CHARLIE AND NICK ARE MY BABEYS THANK YOU VERY MUCH <33333!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰🥰🥰😭😭❤️❤️. Good crying :')). AAAHHHHHHHHH NICK LIKE FULLY TOTALLY CAME OUT :'DDDD!!! I LOVE HIM ❤️❤️❤️❤️😭🥰. AND S T O P CHARLIE'S REACTION :'DDDD. Listen I love them all so much <333. All came to my mind for that sentence and it's true so we're rolling with it. But seriously them finally getting to be Out, like do whatever 🥰🥰🥰🥰. I'm so happy for them :')) <33. And then them deciding to leave xDD. Honestly slay lol. At least they went for a bit, that's good enough for me LOL xD.

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH ALL OF THEM AT THEIR OWN LITTLE PERSONAL PROM :'DDDD!! Like together I mean lol. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰. THEY WERE ALL SO CUTE 🥰🥰🥰. And tbh that looks like so much fun :DD. I do wish Tara and Darcy got to have a chance to be at prom together for a little while but eh yaknow :DD. This was so adorable so I'll be fine 🥰🥰 xD. Also AWW all their goodbye hugs 🥰🥰❤️. I love them all so much <333 😭🥰❤️❤️🥰.

Had to put that before the sad stuff lol xD. Now, back to Nick and Charlie 🥰. First of all that rugby camp story is adorable and hilarious 🥰 xD, and my boys are so adorable 🥰🥰. Now xd 😭. Seeing (hearing) more of Charlie's backstory was so good and SO heartbreaking 😭💔❤️. And speaking of, Nick talking to Tao was so sad and so good <333. And the same goes for his talk with Tara - it was leading up to this all episode :') 😭❤️. And it seriously was amazing. Like I haven't mentioned this so far but the ACTING!!! Y'all the acting from everyone, in this entire show (as in always) is AMAZING!! Just stunning, absolutely phenomenal. Anyway, I did know the basics of Charlie's backstory, just stuff I've found out (like form tumblr or tiktok), but seeing it portrayed in the show is just heartbreaking. It's done so well but I just feel so bad for my boy 😭😭😭😭😭😭💔💔❤️❤️❤️. And Nick supporting him <3333. It's just- FLAWLESS 😭, I LOVE THEM <3333!! AND THEN- AAAHHHHHH!!!! ALMOST AN I LOVE YOU!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Their goodbye :')) stop they're so cute <333. Also I found it fun that they were mismatched, like Charlie looked formal form the bottom half and Nick looked formal for the top half lol xD. Anyway 🥰. I love them so much <33. Also tell me why I was so stressed xD. Like I was like "please don't be a bad cliffhanger please don't be a bad cliffhanger" xD. Out here like "CHARLIE WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING PLEASE" XDD. You just can't take any chances lol 😭 xDD. But then AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! I knew he wasn't gonna send it especially since I was pretty sure there would be a cliffhanger but still AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! I HAD HOPE XDDD!! STILL THOUGH AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😭😭❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰!!! I'M NOT OKAY <3333.

I seriously loved this episode, and this entire season, SO much :'))). I'm sure I'll have more to say so I'll either edit this or make more posts lol, but right now, I'm just so happy <333. It was so good, I loved it so much :)). Also, I managed to watch the entire show in less than 12 hours, which included doing several other things xDD. So, slay for me lol XD.

Oh, and as I joked to my mom, THE COUPLES!! ALL THE COUPLES!! SO MANY COUPLES LOL!! And even just relationship plots like with Isaac xD! I love them all though don't get me wrong lol <333. I was just post episode 6 talking to my mom like "and then even the TEACHERS got together" XDD. I love them all, seriously <3333 🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️.

What an amazing episode, and an amazing season :). They all had such great growth, and I loved everyone's individual storylines :')). Heartstopper is just genuinely such a beautiful story - or like, a billion (okay like a dozen lol) beautiful stories wrapped up in one :')). It's so crazy to me that this can exist, that I get to see something this beautiful and sweet and silly and queer :'D. I love it so much, and I'm so grateful <333.

Thank you so much to the cast and creators, y'all rock :)). It's amazing, congratulations and spectacular job 🥰🥰🥰❤️.

I love this show so much y'all :'D.

AH okay :')). It's just past midnight and I wanna go reblog some posts lol, so I'll finish this up :D.

AND THAT'S THE END OF HEARTSTOPPER SEASON 2!!! SEE Y'ALL NEXT TIME :'D 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥰🥰❤️!!!!!

[feuqueerfire]

The Eclipse Ep 11 Live Blogging

hmm episode 11. scary

Oct 21

Part 1 

D: flashback to Chadok as a witness to Dika’s death. Toward the beginning of the show I’d briefly wondered if maybe Chadok/someone at the school had pushed Dika but if this is true, then I guess that answers that

Also feels like they’ve been trying to slowly seem Chadok more sympathetic (esp since the principal started berating him last ep or 2 eps ago).

Akk stopp not the talks of disappearing from the world! Aw Ayan also crying and telling him not to disappear bro fuckk

the translation part for “people say ‘thanks for keeping me company’” should’ve included the word friend somehow to make it more accurate to what’s being said and also make more sense in this convo

Aye making Akk kiss all over his face girl that’s so cuteeee 

lol when Akk goes up on stage and he gulps and it cuts to Chadok who gulps and then I also gulp

...what was that shot of Thua looking at Akk looking at Ayan

the fucking sense of foreboding this whole scene...

Part 2

truly how does Waree believe so damn wholeheartedly in the curse bruv

...Thua speaking makes me nervous goddamn

somehow Ayan’s “Ai’Thua, one topic at a time, okay?” as he’s worried about Akk is rewindable and rewatchable. it’s kinda like him realizing Thua speaking right now is outside of his control

“You’re my evidence, Aye!” O.O

girl fuck fuck fuck

Thuaaaaaaa why the fuck would you say the dating part out loud tooo and he saw them at the pool fuckedy I’d had a brief thought that somebody might see but then discarded it

I mean Thua’s technically not saying anything wrong except for the part where Akk and Ayan are my favourites and Akk has changeddddd

I’m losing my entire goddamn mind. Akk’s loyalty to Chadok is so strong still, it’s wild. He kept his mouth shut the whole time Thua was accusing him but when he starts accusing Chadok as well Akk’s like “I did it. nobody else was involved”

lol is the Ayan/Akk dating part really important right now, random guy

Wat you deserve a kiss on the forehead; Kan too 

they keep crying every few minutes bro i’m so T.T

damn Kan going at Akk about lying bout the curse

Part 3

“You uncle joined the rival school.” “My uncle killed himself!”

no way is everyone’s theory that Chadok and Dika were a thing about to be true

Ayan/Akk then Dika and Chadok getting randomly outed this ep although Sani at least apologizes to Chadok about it

sorry but seeing Chadok smile so wide... so strange

girl yeah they going straight to Chadok sympathetic character hm Ayan was probably wrong about Chadok being the cause of Dika’s death but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t working Akk to the bone and putting immense pressure on him, I wonder if they’ll be able to balance Chadok being sympathetic but also a horrid teacher 

so Thua’s reasoning in the end was still about wanting the younger protestors to succeed, so I wish when they explained his reasoning for the eclipse stuff, they explicitly mentioned wanting the protestors to keep going and getting bigger

Part 4

this part seems way more lighthearted than the other parts

ngl this part being funny (esp w Namo) is really throwing me off but I guess it’s good because the first 3 parts were so overwhelming and overstimulating, this might a good 10 minutes to decompress

Kan... don’t make a scene right now, I’ll throw up. 

naurr he did the stand up and declaration of ‘we are faen’

okay ngl i skipped through that but it seems like thua was fine with it and the other students were cheesing and oohing too so it’s fine

also, i will say isn’t it a bit weird to just go into writing a screenplay together and publicly declare you’re boyfriends when in fact you’re discovered Thua is like a whole diff person

Akk squishy face

whooooo in the directing/producing whatever department keeps making Ayan/Akk KhaoFirst both simultaneously hold each other’s faces like it looks awkward sad to say

as expected, they’re making the Eclipse

hm okay i still expect next episode to deal with the consequences of what happened this ep i guess

Overall Thoughts:

I think they dropped the ball in part 4 of the episode because they went onto all be happy-go-lucky again when in fact, there should be continued tension and fragile relationships and weariness. They should’ve had the ep 11 curse hit a little more with fractured friend group and relationships. It might’ve even been interesting to see them create the movie (that needs to happen in order to hide Ayan/Akk’s relationship again) under these strained circumstances and relationships. 

I wonder what mood and tone of ep 12 will be. 

People’s reactions to Thua is wild, truly. The visceral hatred I’ve seen for him... wow. Especially wild considering it’s not like he’s done much worse than Akk or Chadok. Akk went farther than Thua when he did stuff that could physically harm the students and Thua went farther when he outed Ayan/Akk. People can forgive Akk because of his development, remorse, and brainwashing while Thua hasn't had any time for development yet (and the writing for his arc is just kinda worse rip), hasn't shown remorse, and didn't have Chadok whispering in his ear. But like Akk actively made the protestors' lives worse and put them in danger as well. He showed remorse but he didn't go apologize to the students because of it. I think any punishment he gets should definitely take into consideration why he was led to these actions (financial situation, Chadok pushing him that way) but that doesn't mean he shouldn't have to own up to it and face some consequences.

So what makes people’s reactions to Akk and Thua different? Akk hurt the Jums but Thua targeted Akk and that was a bigger mistake for the audience. 

They’ve all done bad stuff and let people down and targeted people but the hate for Thua is insane. 

Fave Scene:

idk

Curse Culprit Suspects (Or the Notebook Thief):

So Ayan knew Thua planted the notebook? What was the panic attack about Chadok then?

The Curse As Religion

i just realized something that i hated as a consequence of the curse. yeah they were putting the protestors in danger but hiding it behind a paranormal aspect means the other students felt like the universe was also against the protestors. the protestors knew it wasn’t true but to other students and Waree, it looked like a higher power disapproved. 

gave me very religious ~god hates queerness~ vibes and like fuck chadok akk thua for fueling that and the other students and fucking Waree for believing that and using it to control and bully the protestors and leave them to fend for themselves.

Most viewers that I saw per part during the premiere

didn’t catch it this time

12 hours later

didn’t catch it this time

Views Tracking (just because I’m curious):

10 Weeks Later

Ep 1 - 1: 2.23M (+190k) || Avg Ep 1: 1.50M (+380K)

9 Weeks Later

Ep 2 - 1: 1.38M (+100k) || Avg Ep 2: 1.15M (+90k)

8 Weeks Later

Ep 3 - 1: 1.32M (+80k) || Avg Ep 3: 1.10M (+70k)

7 Weeks Later

Ep 4 - 1: 1.48M (+90k) || Avg Ep 4: 1.18M (+80k)

6 Weeks Later

Ep 5 - 1: 1.31M (+80k) || Avg Ep 5: 1.10M (+70k)

5 Weeks Later

Ep 6 - 1: 1.24M (+80k) || Avg Ep 6: 1.27M (+90k)

4 Weeks Later

Ep 7 - 1: 1.37M (+110k) || Avg Ep 7: 1.21M (+100k)

3 Weeks Later

Ep 8 - 1: 1.44M (+130k) || Avg Ep 8: 1.12M (+100k)

2 Weeks Later

Ep 9 - 1: 1.33M (+90k) || Avg Ep 9: 1.13M (+155k)

1 Week Later

Ep 10 - 1: 1.13M || Avg Ep 10: 1.14M

[tuff-and-fluff-archives]

The fact that I STILL know the entirety of the Japanese lyrics to that Sugar Rush song sure... means something. Idk what honestly I just wanted to flex

[dragonfly-wings1]

For character bingo: Thrawn

Thrawn, my beloved.

"They are so cool looking" Self-explanatory. Blue skin and red eyes is just a LOOK. And those Ascendancy trilogy covers? Whooooo, boy. Yes.

"Everyone but me is wrong about them <3" Well, not everyone, but I have seen some truly baffling takes.

"If they were real, I would be afraid of them" ...unless I was Chiss. And even then, like, I get why the Syndicure preferred him far away.

"If they were real, I would marry them" No one ever accused me of making good life choices, and I'm definitely not going to start now.

"They're like a blorbo to me" #1 blorbo 💙

"Like them enough to project my own issues onto them" ...yeah. Early-Ascendancy era mostly though.

"They got done DIRTY by the fans" In multiple senses! There's both some truly excellent porn (including/especially yours)... and some of those aforementioned truly baffling takes.

"Wow! They are a horrible person!" My favorite part about him.

[skzfairies]

‘the man of ateez’ ep.3.

ateez and yuri on the man of ateez episode 3!

tag list: @atzaria @shinyddeonghwa @wayvisionz @atee @chaerincore

she was so excited this episode but she was so nervous because they were recording infront of jongkook 😭😭

her hands were literally shaking

jongkook was like “don’t be nervous! it’s okay!” she literally wanted to disappear 😭😭

“you’ve literally been on five survival shows why are you nervous😭”

she was like 😐😐 WHY ARE YALL ACTING LIKE IM THE ONLY ONE THATS NERVOUS

the boys just laughed because she was in fact right 😭

when jongkook said “no wonder JYP always says his name before the song” yuri was like 😳she was trying so hard not to laugh 😭😭

no srsly why does that man do that

yuri ended up saying “i escaped the JYP whisper🥰🤞” BUT THEY CUTTED THAT PART

let her trash talk her old boss 😐😐

WHEN HONGJOONG YELLED YES AND PULLED HIS ARMS DOWN SHE WAS LIKE DJDJDJDJ DUDE 😭

she literally fell to the ground laughing , she could not get over it the rest of the episode and randomly just started laughing because she remembered it 😭😭

miss girl will laugh at anything

yuri deadass thought he was going to pick her next she was like nO 😧

cuz she literally laughed at him the whole time 😭

but when he said wooyoung she was like HAHAHA LOSER THATS WHAT U GET

SHE WAS LITERALLY LIKE 🤭🤭🙈🙈 WHEN SEONGHWA WENT “wHOOOOO WEEE”

“our eldest really is cute...huh 😀”

she mocked him after he came back and he was like YURI 🤺🤺🤺 WE WILL FIGHT

they literally pretended that they were throwing punches they looked like middle schoolers prepping for a fight 😀

SHE WAS SO AMAZED BY YUNHO SHE WAS LIKE 😧😧😧 HES SO CUTE

when he added i love you she stood up and threw an over the head heart 😭😭😭

yuri biggest yunho hype woman I KNOW THATS RIGHT

when mingi called himself the coolest person in the world she was like 👏👏👏

“THATS MY BEST FRIEND!”

PLEASE IM CRYING MINGI IS SO FUNNY THE FAN CHANT HE ADDED SJSJSJ

yuri laughed so much this episode

when jongho started dancing she called him an old man 🤭

“jongho why do you dance like an old man?”

jong kook turned around and was like 😧😧😧 “you are brutal😭” all the boys were like SHE IS

“yuri is so mean to us!” - wooyoung, but he quickly surrendered when yuri was like 😀😐

jong kook ended up give her a high five and she jumped up and was like “HAHAH yES I GOT A HIGH FIVE AND YOU DIDNT”

she is literally 5 years old 😭

when yeosang was called she was like “YEOSANG YOU CAN DO IT!” in english

yuri also number one yeosang hype woman

when he sang she was giggling sm because HES SO CUTE

WHEN HE SPELLED OUT LOVE WITH HIS BODY SHE LOST DJDISUSI

“YAH YEOSANG, MY HEART CAN’T HANDLE THIS” she was literally clutching her heart 😭

once he finished yuri was like “....wait now i have to go😭”

DID SHE FORGET SHE WAS ALSO A MEMBER OF ATEEZ???

when she entered eden was like “just be cute” and she was like 😳😳 “am i not already cute??”

mingi and yuri confident icons 🤞🤞

eden just shook his head and was like “just do it 😭😭”

when she did it her voice was kind of like hongjoong’s but more light and it was also cute !

her little added thing was “AYE - TEEZ YU - RI”

SHE THREW HER SELF TO THE GROUND AFTER THAY CUZ SHE HEARD EVERYONE LAUGJING AND SHE WAS LIKE DID I JUST DO THAT SJSJSJDKXI

shes rebranding the JYP whisper🤞🤞

we know JYP is jealous 🥰

jongkook was like “woahhh you’re so lovely!”

MISS GIRL WAS SO BLUSHY SHE WAS LIKE “oh thank you! 🥰🥰🥰”

she ran out of the room in tiny :( shes so cute when she’s embarrassed omg

when jongkook stood up to go she was like “yEAH KJK!”

when he started singing HER MOUTH LITERALLY DROPPED SHE WAS LIKE

SNISIDJDJD VOCAL LEGEND

when they said the rappers would do it she was like ☺️☺️

the captain for her was “could it be lovely yuri?”

wooyoung disagrees with the lovely part

when they said hongjoong she was like “YES LEADER-NIM!”

when jongho was acting like he got a nose bleed her heart literally dropped she was like 😧😧😧

when jongho came back with the cake she was like “master actor jongho did it again” 😭😭

when jongkook was thanking them she was like :D

miss girl had a lot of fun this episode

she mostly just teased her members tho 😭😭

[fiddlepickdouglas]

Viva Las Vegas, Pt. 4 - Favors

Summary: Sunset Curve Alive AU, Willex, will he make it?, 2.5k

@trevor-wilson-covington is the bestie who makes me these lovely edits, we stan supportive friends

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Willie’s hands were red and wrinkly from all the dishwashing. The industrial washer was hot and the smell was gag-inducing but somehow after some time he could manage not to notice it. Glancing at the clock, he sighed heavily. It was 7:40. Alex was going to be on stage soon and he wasn’t even off his shift. He’d had a feeling that was going to happen though. Even if it was foolish to hope, he’d been the fool anyway.

Business had sure picked up from the lull that morning, but thankfully he wasn’t bussing tables. He rarely had to be a waiter, and the main reason he’d gone out there earlier was because there were four attractive boys and no one else and he wasn’t missing a chance to pick up on one of them. Willie hadn’t imagined Alex to be so disarming, not to mention that the chances of seeing him again had seemed impossible.

Finally, the next shift came into the kitchen and he could set his last load on a drying rack. His apron was off and hung and he was headed out the door so quickly that he didn’t see Caleb coming into the kitchen.

“In a rush, William?” the man said in his usual austere manner.

Willie paused in his tracks and looked back at him like a deer in the headlights.

“Ah...yeah, I just....have some errands to run,” he tried to smile casually, but he was no good at lying. It seemed silly that he felt he had to make an excuse, but he was never sure if Caleb was going to demand something more out of him.

“Well, they seem pretty important,” Caleb said, patting his shoulder and peering down at him. Willie could sense the height difference between them. “Better get them done.”

Before he could seize up completely from the intimidation, Willie grabbed his board and helmet and stuffed the cash from his tips into his back pocket. He never adhered to the curfew Caleb gave him, no matter how he got punished for it later. Stepping into the night air and kicking off on his board, a monolithic weight floated away from his shoulders. The breeze was life flowing across his face and through his clothing, hair whipping around behind him.

“Whooooo!” he cried, echoing through the street.

This was what he lived for - the simplicity of him against everything else. His hands were getting the brunt of the wind chill, since he hadn’t let them dry completely before heading out, but it was refreshing.

Willie had learned a lot of shortcuts in the city and if he moved fast enough he would just barely get himself to the show on time. Skating through alleyways and low-traffic streets, he weaved through the Las Vegas nightlife with almost no effort. The lights at this angle were nothing but blurs. His ears still burned to know what Alex had been about to say when he’d mentioned showing him a better view. The thought of them perched above the rest of the city, watching the lights flash and twinkle below - 

A car honked loudly at him as it screeched to a stop, narrowly missing him as he crossed the street. Willie tripped over his board and only just managed to stay on his feet as he held his hands up defensively.

“Sorry!” He called to the driver.

“Use the crosswalk!” they yelled without even rolling down their window.

 He collected his board and ran to the opposite side before he could see their angry mug flipping him off. Once he was safe, he checked over his shoulder and his hands went to feel his helmet. It was on, thank goodness. 

“Use the crosswalk…” he muttered in a mocking manner, laughing it off. Huffing as he mounted his board again, he continued on his way to Alex’s concert.

Just a few blocks later he was at the entrance to the Pearl and looked on at the closed doors. His heart sank slowly as he approached them, pulling on the handles and finding them locked. It couldn’t be too long after eight, right? He peeked inside the windows, hoping to find anyone near the entrance. Nobody was visible. Banging the door a couple times, he waited to see if anyone came.

“Hello?” he shouted, getting no better view through the windows than before. “Heeyyy!”

He saw a security guard round a corner and ditched immediately into the side alley. Willie didn’t own a watch so he had no idea how late he was. He leaned against the wall and sighed deeply, wishing his heartbeat would settle. The taunting thought came that oh well, it wasn’t meant to work out, he’s just some guy in a band. Feeling his fist clench the moment those words crossed his mind, he hit it against the wall and grunted in frustration.

That feeling was wrong, and he knew it was because he had felt something bigger than that. He’d seen Alex’s face and the calm adoration that reflected in his eyes. Willie couldn’t recall feeling more alive and more at home than in those moments. He sat against the wall, leaning his elbows on his knees and placing his head in his hands. There had to be a way to get into the show. Alex had to know that he’d tried, at the very least.

He didn’t know how long he sat there, but the more time passed the more he knew he was just missing the best night of his life. Nothing helpful was coming to him either and he had half a mind to just go back to the bodega and cuddle Sheldon. His finger ran over the sore on his hand that Alex had so tenderly bandaged. He’d had to remove the band-aids while he was washing dishes - the sting was another thing he’d tuned out while working. A door at the side of the building opened and the alley was momentarily flooded with yellow light.

“Jules!” he heard a girl with long braids saying to another girl in an edgy, glamorous dress who was extremely upset.

“Flynn, I’m trying so hard, but I don’t know if I can be my best on stage tonight. I should be there with her!” The other girl said. Willie shrank into the shadows, not wanting to invade on privacy but also not wanting to be caught.

“She knows you would be there if you could! There’s still time and I know that she would be proud of you for killing it up there. Just hear me out, Julie.”

Julie. Willie was trying to remember why that name was significant.

She sighed and crossed her arms. “Say it, because I know I can’t stop you.”

“Okay,” Flynn started. “Your mom got you into music. She gave you a gift! She shared what she loved with you and she didn’t do it so you could drop it when things got tough.”

“Let me guess,” Julie said with a hint of skepticism. “She would want me to keep sharing it?”

“Look at my smart girl,” Flynn said with warm pride. She held out her arms to give her friend a hug.

Julie. Julie. It finally clicked in Willie’s mind. He stood up and stepped into their view, causing them to break apart from their touching moment. Flynn moved protectively in front of her friend.

“Who are you?” she asked, a fierce expression aimed in his direction. Willie raised his hands and slowly approached.

“I don’t mean to butt in,” he said carefully.

“Oh, really? Cuz you just did and we’re kind of in the middle of something personal.” Flynn clearly was down to fight. He moved closer and she blocked him. “You’re gonna have to get through me, skater boy.”

He looked over her shoulder to see the other girl.

“Are you Julie Molina?”

Flynn continued to step between him and Julie, and folded her arms.

“Who’s asking?” she said defiantly.

“I’m Willie,” he said, stopping so Flynn would quit blocking him. He looked at Julie. “First, I’m sorry you can’t be with your mom. It sounds like she isn’t okay and that really sucks.” The girls shared a glance full of pity. “Also, sorry for asking, but do you know Alex?”

Julie came forward and put a hand on Flynn’s shoulder, giving her a look that made her friend drop the mama bear attitude.

“Yeah, I do,” she said hesitantly.

“Uh…” Willie started awkwardly. “Well, he told me to come tonight and it looks like I missed my chance. I just wanted him to know I didn’t forget.”

Flynn raised an eyebrow but Julie shrugged at it.

“You know he’s playing right now,” she told him.

Willie nodded, looking down at the ground. That wasn’t a reminder he really needed. Flynn studied him for a few seconds and then raised a finger, furrowing her brow.

“Are you the guy Alex was talking about earlier?”

He looked slightly flabbergasted.

“Who was he talking about earlier?”

“Oh, just some skater with a cat in a sandwich shop,” she said, heavy on the sarcasm. “We got him to confess.” She gave Julie a smug look.

Willie couldn’t help smiling.

“Yep, it’s him.” Flynn smirked.

Julie looked at him thoughtfully for a minute.

“You know what?” she began. “I don’t usually do this, but I’m gonna do this.” She went to the door again.

“Does this mean you’re good about going on tonight?” Flynn asked.

“Yeah,” Julie said. “You were right. My mom would want me there. And she would also want me to do favors once in a while.” She gave a pointed look at Willie as she pulled the door open. Flynn got an excited look on her face, grabbed Willie’s wrist, and started pulling him inside.

“Sorry about coming off the wrong way,” she said back to him. “Are we good?”

“You bet we’re good,” he replied, not sure how he’d gotten this far, but happy nonetheless. They moved through storage rooms full of props and costumes from other theatrical shows being held at the venue. Faint rock music echoed from above.

“Okay people, Julie and Flynn plus one coming through!” Flynn called as they passed various members of the tech crew. She let go of Willie’s wrist so he could properly hold his board as he followed them. First, they met a man with short gray hair who approached Julie with concern.

“Estás bien mija?” he asked, holding his arms out slightly to invite a hug if she needed one. Julie accepted it, but it was only a quick one.

“I’ll be okay, dad,” she said reassuringly. “At least for tonight, I will.”

Her dad patted her on the back as he nodded toward Willie.

“Who’s this?”

Julie raised her eyebrows awkwardly.

“Uhhhhhh this is my new friend! My new friend....” she eyed him to provide his name, having clearly forgotten.

“Willie,” he followed, holding out a hand to shake.

“Nice to meet you, Willie, I’m Ray,” her dad said, taking his hand. He didn’t seem to question that Julie had picked up a new friend for a moment. “Well, I’m going to head to my seat with Carlos. You’re gonna do great out there, mija.” He blew her a kiss as he walked off.

They could all hear the crowd screaming. Sunset Curve had finished their set and by the sound of footsteps, were all headed backstage. Willie had a mix of disappointment that he didn’t actually get to see them play, but it paled next to his excitement to see Alex.

Flynn grabbed Willie’s wrist again, leading him to one of the dressing rooms. She knocked lightly, and a voice was heard saying “come in”. She simply opened the door and pushed Willie inside.

“This belongs to you!” she said, giving Willie a double thumbs up before dashing off with a devilish smile on her face. As Willie stumbled forward, Alex turned around from wiping his face in the mirror. His eyes went wide in surprise as he dropped the towel he was holding.

“How did you - how…?” Alex was lost for words, but his smile grew.

Willie shrugged charismatically and jutted his thumb back toward where Flynn had been, clicking his teeth.

“I have my ways,” he said smoothly, dropping his board on the floor and making his way over to Alex.

“Sorry I’m all sweaty,” Alex said sheepishly, pulling his chair up, sitting on it backwards and facing Willie.

“Don’t worry about it,” Willie said, sitting cross-legged on the end of an ottoman, aware that if he moved too close their knees would touch. “I’m sorry I just missed seeing you guys play.”

“Oh, well,” Alex flailed his hands awkwardly. “I mean, that is a bummer, but I’m not mad about it.”

Willie just looked on fondly. Alex was so uncomplicated compared to everything else, and it made him all but go dizzy.

“Julie’s going to be on pretty soon,” Alex was saying. “You could join me and the guys to watch her. We won’t be doing anything fun after, though, because her mom isn’t doing well and we have a long drive home tomorrow.” He stopped there, and they both sat not thinking about how tomorrow would come and put a distance between them. Willie hadn’t even known him for twenty-four hours and that inevitable separation felt...wrong.

“Before we go up, then, I have a question,” Wille said.

Alex looked at him with expecting eyes. Willie looked back into them, smiling.

“What were you going to say this morning, about the lights in the city?”

Blinking, Alex took a minute to recollect what Willie was referring to. He gave a big nod when it finally came to him.

“Right. You were saying that I needed to see them at the right angle and that you would show me if I weren’t already busy.” He paused and stared at the floor for a few seconds. When he looked up he asked, “Was that an invitation?”

“It is now,” Willie responded.

Reggie poked his head in the door.

“Alex, we’re heading up to watch Julie, you coming?” he said. Then he pointed at Willie with a goofy smile. “Hey, buddy! Good to see you!” Bobby was peeking in over his shoulder, and the smug look on his face made Alex turn red.

“Yep,” Alex said matter-of-factly, a goofy expression on his face. “We - ” He glanced over at Willie, surprised to refer to the two of them as ‘we’. “We’re coming.”

Reggie and Bobby disappeared as Alex glanced at the clock on the wall. Willie put a hand on his back and rubbed slightly, feeling his nerves extending into the entire room. Taking in a deep breath, Alex simply gave him an appreciative look and stood up.

“Come on, let’s get up there,” he said in a breathy tone.

Willie smiled wide. Leaving his board and his helmet behind, he followed Alex out to their seats, ready to watch the girl who’d helped him get to this point put on a stunning performance.

[sceptilemasterr]

Defenders of the Flame (TE Rewrite) Act 3, Scene 8 - The Penderghast Amorelia Day Gala

Title: Defenders of the Flame (A CIU Screenplay)

Main Pairings: Shreya x F!MC, Beckett x F!Atlas

Other Pairings: N/A

Genre: Full Rewrite (The Elementalists, Book 1)

Rating: PG-13 for violence, blood, swearing, alcohol, and sexuality

Summary: Several weeks later, Fiora and her friends enjoy a night of dancing, food, and fun.

Previous Scene: Never Bet Against Fiora

Masterlist: Link

INT. RHUKA HALL - GRAND BALLROOM - NIGHT

Several weeks later, the Amorelia Day Gala has arrived. Penderghast’s Grand Ballroom, located on Rhuka Hall’s top floor, has been fully decorated for the event. The entire room is bathed in a soft blue light, changing and shifting in ways reminiscent of sunlight being filtered through water. Toward the ceiling, multicolored floating umbrellas hang suspended by some kind of Air Stoichi. Beautiful fountains erupt in impossible patterns, shaped by Water Stoichi into figures and patterns that rise and fall in time with the music. A table against the far wall hosts countless dishes of all kinds of food, complete with several multi-layered cakes at the center. A few Penderghast students, along with several professors, are already present as several more trickle in, all dressed for the occasion. Then:

FIORA: Holy... wow! This place is amazing!

SHREYA (smiling): Not half as amazing as moi. Or, for that matter, my lovely date.

Fiora blushes heavily as she and Shreya make their way into the room. Shreya wears a beautiful beige dress with matching circlet, both of which are decorated with a Light-Att technique that makes them sparkle every time she moves. Fiora’s dress, in contrast, is a muted golden color with flowing translucent sleeves. As they enter, Fiora beams at her date.

FIORA: Shreya... this is amazing! Thank you!!

SHREYA: Perhaps I ought to be thanking you for saying “yes.”

FIORA (blushes): Yeah... I’m a bit slow sometimes--

She is interrupted by Shreya pulling her into a quick kiss. They break apart quickly when Shreya spots Zeph, Griffin, and Peter approaching.

SHREYA: Oh! Hi, everyone! So glad you could make it!

ZEPH (laughing): Don’t worry about us. We’re not interrupting anything!

Shreya and Fiora blush furiously.

GRIFFIN: Glad you both could make it! Did either of you see Beckett, by the way?

ZEPH: ...Or Atlas?

Fiora shrugs.

FIORA: They might be going together. I don’t know, Atlas was kinda hesitant about--

BECKETT: Ah, there you are!

Beckett approaches the group, along with an unfamiliar, bland-looking woman they do not recognize. Beckett is dressed in a crisp suit with golden tie, his hair impeccably combed straight back. The woman beside him wears a sparkling navy-blue dress, and Fiora at first doesn’t recognize her. Then, she seems to realize something, and peers closer at Beckett’s companion.

FIORA: ...Atlas?!

ZEPH: Wait, Atlas? Where?

SHREYA: Fiora, what are you--

The woman at Beckett’s side smirks, then waves a hand in front of her face and makes a few quick gestures. The unfamiliar features fall away, replaced with Atlas’s distinctive silver hair and facial features identical to Fiora’s. Zeph lets out a soft gasp.

ATLAS: ...I assume that damn thing works, then?

BECKETT: But of course! None can recognize you now, save those you’ve granted permission to.

ATLAS: Good. ‘Cause I’m leaving this place immediately if there’s any chance of--

ZEPH (laughs): Come on, Atlas! Can’t you just enjoy yourself for five minutes? I promise, nothing crazy’s gonna attack the Gala while we’re here. Okay?

Atlas scowls. Then she relents, smiling slightly at Beckett.

ATLAS: ...Fine. Can’t hurt to be here with someone like him, after all. He’s almost as good with combat stoichi as I am!

BECKETT: I--excuse you, what do you mean, almost?!

ATLAS: Oh, please. As if you even understood half the things I’ve had to...

As Atlas and Beckett continue arguing, the others exchange a look of exasperation.

FIORA: There they go again...

PETER: Uh, Griff, what’s with the disguise? I don’t think most people wear Cloakguises to go to Penderghast dances...

FIORA (shrugs): She’s my twin sister. Long story short, she’s... not supposed to be here.

ZEPH: Also, Beckett’s had a huge crush on her since even before we knew she existed--

BECKETT: I did NOT!

PETER (laughs): Sure he didn’t. Anyway, fair enough. I ain’t about to rat her out to Goeffe if you aren’t.

He glances over at the back of the room, where Dean Goeffe stands, a severe look on her face as she engages Dr. Englund in deep conversation.

SHREYA: Well? Shall we, then?

Shreya tugs Fiora out toward the center of the room, the other Pend Pals following close behind. As they approach the dance floor, Zeph dashes ahead of the others.

ZEPH: Watch this! I’ve been waiting for weeks to show you all this move!

Zeph launches into a full body wave, complete with shoulder shimmy. The others watch, enraptured... most of them, anyway.

BECKETT (huffs): I give that a two out of ten.

ZEPH: Oh, c’mon. That’s at least a seven, isn’t it?

BECKETT: Then show me a “seven.”

Zeph pouts as Shreya pulls Fiora onto the dance floor.

SHREYA: Alright, allow moi to show you a thing or two!

Shreya launches into a complicated dance sequence, complete with handstands, cartwheels, and other flashy moves. After a moment, she grabs Fiora’s hands and draws her in to the dance.

FIORA: Shreya, I don’t--Whoa!

After a few beats of dancing, Shreya grabs Fiora’s arms, holding them outward so that her hands are facing up. Perplexed, Fiora keeps her hands there... only for Shreya to step back, then leap into her hands, using them as a foothold to backflip through the air!

ZEPH: Holy Source!

GRIFFIN: Whooooo!

PETER: Yeah!

ATLAS (shrugs): Not bad.

Shreya lands and strikes a pose beside a still-slightly-bewildered Fiora. The others all applaud.

GRIFFIN: That was amazing! Shreya, where’d you learn that?

Shreya giggles as they step off of the dance floor.

SHREYA: I learned that one at a club in Pennseil!

Everyone besides Fiora gapes at her, impressed. Fiora simply looks confused.

FIORA: Okay, is this one of those Attuned things I just don’t understand, or...?

ATLAS (whispering): Pennseil is the Attuned reflection of... “Paris,” I think it’s called.

Fiora gasps in recognition.

FIORA: Oh! Wow, Shreya, that’s super awesome!

SHREYA: ...Well, Beckett?

BECKETT: Hmph. Well, I suppose that might be worthy of a ten out of ten, if for no other reason than by comparison with the single other entry in this impromptu competition.

ZEPH: Hey!

Atlas bursts out laughing. Shreya smiles and wraps an arm around Fiora.

SHREYA: Well. As if I would ever lose such a contest with you by my side, non?

FIORA: Of course not. That was seriously amazing, Shreya.

PETER: Hang on, I think I just spotted some cake. Can’t miss out on that!

GRIFFIN: Looks delicious! Let’s go!

The two of them dash over to the dessert table, with Fiora and the others following close behind. The group eagerly approaches the huge, multi-colored cakes dominating the center of the dessert display.

FIORA: Wow. Okay, that looks amazing.

She moves forward to take a slice, but Shreya grabs her arm and pulls her back.

FIORA (frowning): Hey!

SHREYA: Don’t worry, darling, you’ll get your chance. I just want to be certain you know what you’re getting into, first.

FIORA: Why? It’s just cake-- (sighs) It’s... not just cake, is it?

SHREYA (laughs): Of course not! The esteemed Chef Liyan Fang would never make something as ordinary as a simple cake, without even a single stoicheal infusion, can you imagine?

FIORA: So this thing has some kind of... effect? If I eat it, it’ll do something?

SHREYA: Just watch.

Peter grabs a slice from the blue tier of the cake, near the center. He takes a bite.

GRIFFIN (laughs): Wait for it...

A few seconds later, Peter lets out a series of musical belches that play perfectly in tune with the music playing overhead! Fiora gasps in surprise, then giggles, as the others all laugh.

FIORA: Ooh! I wanna try!

GRIFFIN: There’s gonna be more than one effect. It all depends on which color tier you take the slice from, plus which part of the cake. Choose wisely!

FIORA: Wait, so, is there a sign or something that says which part does what?

PETER (laughs): Where’s the fun in that? You’ve gotta take a wild guess, be surprised!

FIORA (hesitantly): Oh... I don’t--

She swallows, and her expression changes as she confidently approaches the table. She nods once.

FIORA: You know what? Why not. Here I go!

She takes a slice from the corner of the cake’s yellow tier and cautiously takes a bite. The others look at her expectantly.

ATLAS: ...Well?

FIORA: I don’t feel any-- Whoa!

Fiora stumbles back in shock, and the camera shifts to her perspective. She (and the camera) look around at each of the others, and we see shining auras surrounding each of them. Shreya’s aura is a flickering reddish-orange; Griffin’s, a shifting earth tone; Beckett’s is stiff and silvery; Peter’s is wispy and fleeting; Zeph’s is bluish-green; and Atlas’s resembles Zeph’s, but much stronger, with an overlay of crackling yellow lines rushing throughout.

SHREYA: Fiora? Are you okay?

FIORA: Yeah, I... I think I’m seeing your stoichi! It’s surrounding everyone, like a glow, or...

BECKETT: Ah! Your vision must have been enhanced so as to better make out our stoicheal auras!

SHREYA: You actually can see them normally, if you try hard enough. Though here, surrounded by so many Attuned, it’s hard to notice... they’re fairly faint most of the time.

FIORA: Whoa. This is trippy. I--

Fiora’s (and the camera’s) vision pans to the left, toward Dean Goeffe and Dr. Englund... and we hear Fiora gasp. Dr. Englund’s aura is a stronger version of Griffin’s, but Dean Goeffe’s is a swirling mass of darkness, engulfing her to the point that we are barely able to see the dean herself through the thick aura.

FIORA (quietly): Dean Goeffe... her aura, it’s...

Atlas glances over at the dean. She frowns.

ATLAS (quietly): I don’t see anything. What is it?

FIORA: It’s black. And... it looks angry. It’s so thick, I can barely see her. What is that?

GRIFFIN (curiously): I don’t see anything. She looks like a normal Metal-Att to me.

FIORA: No, I--

The aura effect fades away.

FIORA: Darn. It’s gone! Hang on, give me some more of that cake!

The camera returns to a normal perspective as Fiora reaches forward, grabbing another piece of the cake. This time, she takes from the side of the yellow tier instead of the corner. After taking a big bite... She suddenly starts levitating in the air, wisps of Air Stoichi circling around her feet!

FIORA: Whoa! Okay, I did not expect that.

Everyone laughs.

SHREYA: The location of the slice matters too, remember? Wow, I absolutely must try one now.

As Shreya and the others all start taking their own slices of cake, all of whom end up with a wide variety of stoicheal effects, Fiora frowns, looking back at where the dean and Dr. Englund had been. Dr. Englund is now standing near the wall, gazing out at the crowd... and the dean is nowhere to be seen.

FIORA (to herself): That... something’s wrong...

After a brief moment, Atlas comes up to Fiora. Her hands and wrists are covered with shimmering red scales that are slowly fading away.

FIORA: What’s with the scales?

ATLAS: Damn cake.

FIORA (laughs): Should’ve known! Anyway, what’s up?

ATLAS (shrugs): Dunno. I just wanted to say... thanks. For keeping me around all that time, even though you barely knew me...

FIORA: Aw, Atlas, you don’t have to--

Atlas holds up a hand, and Fiora stops talking.

ATLAS: Seriously. You could’ve kicked me out at any time, or reported me to someone. Couldn’t blame you, with how suspicious I was being of your friends. But you put up with me. Not only that, when things were going south at the birthday party... you really stepped up. And now... well, I’m glad I’m here. With your friends.

FIORA (knowingly): By ‘friends,’ d’you mean... ‘Beckett,’ specifically?

ATLAS: Now you’re pushing it.

FIORA: Sorry.

ATLAS: But seriously. Thanks. I’m starting to see why everyone made such a big deal about this party. It’s... fun.

FIORA (smiles): If anyone deserves to have fun, it’s you, Atlas. I can’t imagine there were many parties in the Between.

ATLAS (laughs): If Raife’s evil cultists were having any parties, I sure as hell wasn’t invited. ‘Sides, at least here, I know I’ve got people to watch my back.

FIORA: Really?

ATLAS: There’s nobody I’d rather have at my side in a pinch than my sister. And... just between you and me, I don’t entirely mind that Beckett guy. He’s... competent.

FIORA (knowingly): “Competent.” Right. He’s definitely... that.

ATLAS (awkwardly): Right. Whatever, enough with all that sentimental crap. Catch you later.

Atlas disappears into the crowd. Fiora looks around, bewildered, until Shreya appears and pulls her into a twirl.

FIORA: Whoa! Hey there, Shreya.

SHREYA: Fiora! Just the good-looking and absolutely breathtaking Light-Att I wanted to see. Come dance with me!

Fiora smiles at her date.

FIORA: I thought you’d never ask! I’d love to.

Shreya leads Fiora out onto the dance floor as the music shifts to a slow waltz. They start to dance perfectly in time with one another, moving slowly around the dance floor.

SHREYA: This is lovely. Why don’t we dance together more often?

FIORA: Dunno. Guess we’ve been too busy with school... and fighting off random shadow monsters... and discovering my secret twin... y’know, usual stuff.

SHREYA (laughs): Ah, yes. Things are never dull with you around, are they? I am so glad we ended up roommates. It was clearly meant to be.

Fiora smiles warmly at Shreya.

FIORA: We were clearly meant to be, I’d say.

SHREYA: Oh, I agree. Everything is simply so... beautiful. Don’t you think?

FIORA: Yeah. Beautiful...

Fiora leans in and kisses Shreya.

SHREYA: Well! That’s certainly something the Fiora of a few months ago never would have done!

FIORA: Why, are you complaining?

SHREYA: Perish the thought!

They resume their dance as the music shifts into something more upbeat. After a few moments, Atlas and Beckett join them, followed closely by Griffin and Peter. They all dance together for a brief moment, until finally the song ends, to be replaced with another. The six of them all head toward the edge of the dance floor, where Zeph is waiting, eating from a heaping plate of some type of glowing Attuned snack.

SHREYA: This had best be important. I really was enjoying myself!

Atlas gives her a meaningful nod, then jerks her head in the direction of the ballroom’s entrance. Shreya and the others follow her gesture to see...

FIORA (astonished): Dr. Swan?!

SHREYA: She’s back? But... I don’t... that cannot--

BECKETT (frowning): Rather suspicious, isn’t it? That she should vanish for so long... only to reappear now? And without even speaking to Fiora or Shreya?

ATLAS: Took the words right out of my mouth. Something’s wrong.

FIORA: Let me talk to her. Maybe she knows something.

Fiora starts walking toward Dr. Swan, when suddenly, the booming voice of Dean Goeffe, amplified by telepathy, echoes through everyone’s minds.

DEAN GOEFFE (echoing): ATTENTION. THIS IS AN OFFICIAL PENDERGHAST ANNOUNCEMENT FROM DEAN GOEFFE. THIS CAMPUS IS CURRENTLY IN A STATE OF EMERGENCY. ALL STUDENTS ARE INSTRUCTED TO RETURN TO THEIR DORMITORIES IMMEDIATELY, AND AWAIT FURTHER INSTRUCTION.

As the students around them start panicking, Fiora and her friends look around with suspicion.

ATLAS: Okay. I can’t be the only one who finds this suspicious, right?

GRIFFIN: Right. Something’s wrong...

DEAN GOEFFE (echoing): ALL PENDERGHAST PROFESSORS ARE TO REPORT TO MIRROR STORAGE AT THIS TIME. I REPEAT: THIS CAMPUS IS CURRENTLY IN A STATE OF EMERGENCY. ALL STUDENTS...

The Pend Pals watch as Dr. Swan and Dr. Englund both immediately head toward the ballroom’s entrance, disappearing through its double doors. Fiora looks around at her friends, then at Atlas.

FIORA: Something’s not right. We need to follow them.

ATLAS: Agreed.

Amidst the throng of confused and terrified students, seven students make their way toward the exit, following the professors toward the Mirror Storage room...

_______________________

Notes: And so the climax begins... let's hope our heroes are strong enough to handle whatever comes next for them!

Timeline: The Amorelia Day Gala takes place on March 17th, 2018.

_______________________

Next: Into the Between

CIU Tag List: @brightpinkpeppercorn @endlesshero1122 @bbaba-yagaa @acidsugar0 @shaylan211 @griselda1121 @acanthisorbis @marmolady @choicesbabie

DotF/Elementalists Tag List:

[lovespelt]

Ok, I think it's time to finish the Among Us TDBKDK Au ask bcz I'm sleep deprived once again. (idek WHY I get creative whenever I'm sleep deprived, must be a talent)

Ok so anyways where was I— The White got ejected thing lmao ok.

Ahem.

So now. After she was out of the ship, everyone exited cafeteria and went on to do their respective tasks to help THE SKELD land on MIRA HQ.

Except the—now, 3 Impostors.

Izuku and todoroki stared at the orange suited male. Both shoulders tense, neither of them spoke, they were waiting for a few seconds more. Until The quiet atmosphere was broken with Izuku's question.

"Why?"

Silence.

"Why did you lie?"

More Silence.

Izuku slammed his hands on the the table, making Todoroki flinch. The orange bastard is still sitting there, relaxed and smug even after the meeting. Izuku eyed them both with narrowed eyes.

"Why did you do it? You know I could eat you both right now even after you defended me. I wouldn't cared if one of you got ejected, or both of you for that matter. I literally ate a person in half in front of both of you. I eat humans. So why would you defend a something like me?"

Izuku looked at both of them with a deadly glare.

More Silence.

Until Orange opened his mouth. Once again surprising Izuku of the words that came out.

"....Because you're fucking hot that's what."

"....I hate to agree with him but yeah, I think you're hot too."

Izuku blinked in surprise. His face was feeling hot, was this an allergic reaction for eating brown? Maybe, he'll look into that later.

But right now, he should probably say something.

"....What."

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Lmao well it was something. After that they asked what Orange's name is bcz they keep calling each other by color and it's starting to get weird.

Bakugou pointed that at the top of each helmet there was a personal carved name on top so they'll know who is who.

Izuku's helmet is a bit broken. so the top only shows "De" with a smudgy "Ku" at the end. Pretty sure that was blood.

But Bakugou keeps calling him Deku anyway because he had killed 3 people and he got caught on both times. Even when Izuku told them his name lololol

So Izuku playfully called Bakugou "Kacchan" to mock him but he just... Blushed..

Izuku, thinking: (what is up with humans turning their face to look like a Solanum lycopersicum?)

And todoroki would be all jealous and call Izuku, "Izu-chan" and Izuku being the oblivious Alien that he is. Calls Todoroki "Shouchan" as well lmao.

And of course he turns red as well lmao.

And Izuku is like: ???????????

Still 😂

Anyway, Bakugou taught them how to sabotage and shit coz he's a smartass like that.

And he has a gun with him.

In space.

For some reason....

......Hush it's for the plot.

Ok CONTINUING THIS,

Izuku gets hungry again but he kinda,,, doesn't wanna move now coz he's scared to be caught. And Bakugou is like I'll kill for you and todoroki is like me too and Izuku's tummy just flutters (what the fuck? Why is Brown's skull moving so much?? Isn't he supposed to be dead???)

Anyway both of them killed Lime and fed Izuku. All the while his face feels weird and his his stomach feels like millions of asteroids colliding. Did they put something on Lime's arm or something?, Bcz it tasted extra nice.

(awe poor baby Izuku, he doesn't know what love and kindness areeeee)

Anyway there are 2 crewmates left, but Izuku can see that they are nearing the atmosphere of his planet. And there he saw a ship above the sky, MIRA HQ.

The Spaceship connected with each other and the door opens. Revealing 5 crewmate members who are already there.

"oh! New crewmates!! New faces!! Hello!!!" The pink one waved enthusiastically.

The 5 of them got out of THE SKELD and into MIRA HQ.

Izuku was amazed and kind of annoyed, how did he and his fellow kind did not notice the human's spaceship above their home planet. Like seriously, it must be an invisibility scan But he was amazed by how everything was in bright colors! It looked so pretty!! He was in awe. Humans are definitely much more pretty colorful than his own kind.

(That's why he stole collected all kinds of human clothes, he didn't get why Kacchan called his 'fashion sense' , 'atrocious' and 'hideous' when he worn his favorite human shoes. THEY WERE BRIGHT RED AND PRETTY FUCK YOU KACCHAN, Katsuki: plz do w/ your tongue, what, nothing)

The purple one looked at them confused "why is there only 5 of you guys? Didn't the boss man said there would be 10 peeps joining our ship??" Purple asked.

"Don't get paid enough for this shit." Black muttered in the back. (They looked so obnoxious and snarky and arrogant Izuku couldn't wait for himself to sink his teeth into them)

Yellow and red, the only true crewmate members left in their group, were looking grim and too uneasy to explain.

"Oh. Haven't you heard?" Todoroki asked them instead.

"Or did you fucking extras forgot to check your fucking communication for news?" Bakugou snarked at them.

Izuku looked at his new food crewmates. He smiled.

"There was an Impostor among us."

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

WHOOOOO FINALLY FINISHED ISJENFJDJJE HELL YEAH. (They thought the Impostor was White so they think they're safe lmao) I HOPE YOU LIKED THIS AU MY GOOD FELLOW ASSOCIATE LMAO, JUST PULLED THIS SHIT RIGHT UP MY ASS SORRY IF IT'S NOT CREATIVE ENOUGH.

(Maybe make a part 3 in POLUS 👀👀 lmao Jk Jk)

Unless...? 👀👀👀

ooh a part II to the among us au! i am loving these todobakudeku antics hehe

[thatdamnokie]

so, as everybody knows, our man, the lovely mark strong, turned 57 this past august 5th

since the kingsman films have had a huge influence on several aspects of my day-to-day life (gee, wonder what group of people i could be referring to...), i decided to sit down and do something i’ve been thinking about since getting my medical card earlier this year: getting high as a kite and watching them back-to-back.

to celebrate mark’s birthday, i decided to do another running commentary post like the one i did for rocknrolla ages ago, under the cut. it’s a pretty similar style, which is to say not necessarily super coherent and might be hard to understand if you’ve never seen the movies. D:

there are some mentions of the roanoke society, but not many.

if even just one person finds this mildly entertaining for four seconds, then i’ll have done my job. there is a lot of cursing and this is NOT spoiler-free.

enjoy~

edited 9.1.20 to correct typos and such, please remember that i was Not Sober while i wrote this lmao

how many times have i watched these movies at this point? i don’t even know.  

i always liked the nifty like—retro arcade marv opening animation

and the thing with the tapes! we love book-ending devices!

kingsman: badass motherfuckers worldwide incorporated

like why was merlin even with them? i understand why lee and james would be there, but merlin, was he not acting quartermaster then?

i have SO MANY FEELINGS about lee unwin

i think it haunts harry and merlin more than anyone thinks, but these are fun spy movies so we just don’t talk about trauma and shit, don’tcha know

don’t look at how merlin tears up and tell me he doesn’t drink about it *HEAVILY* later

it’s such a stark contrast to see the 1990s interior vs. what it’s like when eggsy’s grown :(

michelle baby i’m so sorry. you deserved better than this.

and BABY EGGSY

omg. like this scene is both heartbreaking but is also adorable.

colin firth has gd anime legs, that dude had to straight up unfold himself as he stood up lmao

aaannnnd swooping logo, whooooo, goin’ over some mountains~

and mark hamill, ladies and gentlemen!

this whole thing with james deciding to kinda go rogue makes me wish that we knew more about his backstory as well. like, is this james being james, or was this a weird one-off situation and he was just unlucky?

YES unlucky. nobody could plan for the hurricane of sleek destruction that is gazelle

who has one of my favorite aesthetic designs as a villain (although i guess i’d put her more on maybe henchman level? but idk, it seems like valentine looked at her more as a partner, less like an assistant? and they had a very interesting chemistry together too, like i would’ve added more valentine x gazelle scenes)

i would LOVE to be this chill about just—draping blankies over bodies

blankies over bodies sounds like a cool band name

DIBS you guys can’t have it

i am SO GLAD samuel l. jackson gave valentine a lisp!

valentine, to me, does fit a lot of the usual spy movie villain tropes

but since this movie doesn’t take itself super serious, it’s more fun than annoying

and we never hear about any of the other knights?? like

half of this is just gonna be me whining for additional footage that there just wouldn’t have been room for realistically lmao

michael caine, you are lovely

MARK STRONG, LADIES AND GENTLEMAN

WITH LEGS THAT DON’T QUIT AND AN ACCENT THAT I’D DIE FOR

i’m an embarrassment

like let’s all stop and thank god that mark didn’t have time to learn the welsh accent

not that i would’ve been disappointed, because all accents are good accents on this blog

but at this point i can’t imagine merlin as—not scottish

“try picking a more suitable candidate this time”

arthur you DICK

like were you this cold-blooded when lee died, you fuckin’ reptilian-ass son of a bitch

no wonder you were charlie’s pledge person thing

and enter the fabulous taron egerton, stage left!

DEAN you are DISGUSTING

god, michelle, you need better friends, if you were my bro this entire relationship would’ve never happened

;-; and eggsy’s so sweet with his sister! i know there probably wasn’t “room” for it but i AM glad that there are scenes showing that family is one of eggsy’s kinda “core values”or whatever you want to call it

dude is a hufflepuff through and through imo

can you imagine eggsy as a villain? we would be so fucked. he’s sly, he’s smart, he could’ve made life v e r y difficult for lots of people if he really wanted to

but look at him with the squad!

eggsy’s just like the british version of a good ol’ boy

this car scene is some dukes of hazzard bullshit (ramp-jumping and fun car horn aside)

if butterflies are harry’s main symbolic critter, would foxes be eggsy’s? or would it be a pug instead? i guess that’s like asking if harry would be either a butterfly or a cairn terrier, like mr. pickle. let’s say both.

this fandom is pretty on top of character associations like that

you get symbolic associations! YOU get symbolic associations! EVERYONE gets symbolic associations whether they’re actually in the canon or not! don’t have any? don’t worry, we’ll assign you at least one!

the guy playing the interviewing officer is ALSO the patriarch in the witch which i didn’t realize until—like, a while after

and it was while @circlesofbone​ was visiting, and we were just “oh, okay, guess we can’t escape this cast at all, this is fine”

“your father saved my life.”

harry you’re such a fucking peacock, waiting all posted up and posing so you’ll look cool

you big doofus

i’d kill to be inside his head during this first conversation with eggsy though

like is eggsy like lee? is harry seeing lee the entire time he’s talking to his son, in his mannerisms, how he carries himself, how he speaks?

or is eggsy the opposite? which—i don’t know if that would somehow be sadder?

there’s just a lot going on in the background of this bit that’s left up to interpretation

“although i’m sure it’s well-founded—“

harry’s just so casual about this entire thing, nobody’s that casual without practice

harry you rabble-rouser, what kind of life have you led

“manners. maketh. man.”

our timeless motto, my flowers

kingsman STILL to this DAY has some of the most well-choreographed fight scenes i’ve ever seen??

like yeah the church scene but even just this initial bar fight

harry could’ve been a dancer

in a way i guess he already is

like he moves so fluidly and gracefully, it is BONKERS

colin you did so good! i’m so proud!

the way eggsy’s just O.O

whether or not you ship hartwin, like, you gotta admit, that was hot

and his BODY LANGUAGE, he’s sitting like RAMROD straight, this poor dude lmao

nobody prepares you for a situation like that in public school is all i’m saying

harry, exiting stage left like a suave, smooth motherfucker

remember when iggy azalea was relevant

ugghhhh i hate this part

“I WASN’T WITH NO ONE”

can you imagine being harry hart listening to your dead friend’s son getting the shit beat out of him

like, surely he heard the cleaver, he knows dean was going to fucking gut eggsy right?

listen to how cold and icy his voice gets, oof

yeah, he’s pissed, and dean is lucky

PARKOUR

ugh, i want to go to london ;-; i want to walk in front of the shop and visit harry’s house and kiss cute english boys

i’d like to think harry’s super excited to show eggsy everything but he’s gotta keep it dialed back because “decorum”

the way eggsy pauses though

“come on.”

and he says it so softly.

if i was eggsy, i’d be nervous, too.

but i didn’t realize how quickly harry tries to give off signals like “hey there’s no reason to be scared.”

“like my fair lady?” “well, you’re full of surprises.” <3 one of my favorite sceneeesss.

harry’s voice is so soothing but eggsy is so freaked out by the elevator that he’s just—there’s no room for anything else beyond processing the elevator lmao

“how deep does this fucking thing go?” asking the real questions

aannnddd KINGSMAN BULLET TRAIN

i’d like to think they have like soft jazz or something playing in there

and then they get to the hangar and there are obviously a buuuuunch of people out on the tarmac that we just—never hear about? i just assume they’re all like technical officers or maybe other agents

“your father had the same look on his face. … as did i.”

harry is already rooting for him.

“late again, sir.”

that. brogue.

fuck, i could listen to him talk for hours, scottish accents are my favorite thing

#squadgoals

not a very diverse cast :/

the body bag speeeeech

and of course nobody was in any actual danger, but merlin doesn’t want them to know that so he becomes mr. hard as steel, i am emotionally stoic at all times, do not test me you bunch of rugrats

“classic army technique.”

ROXY

ROXY I WANT TO JUST HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS TT.TT

aannnnddd charlie, also

who we might’ve found sympathy for if we knew aaannyytthiinnggg else about his backstory

like, could he just be Like That, yeah

but most people i know who are assholes like that are that way because their parents were first /shrug/

can hardly fault the dude for turning out like that when poison was all he was given to drink

anyone else a hundred percent positive they would’ve drowned in the first trial

i would absolutely have panicked and bit it

but then again, i’m not kingsman material, i’m roanoke

and if this is the exact same test that merlin and harry went through, does that mean there might be some weird drowning trauma hidden back in there that’s just ANOTHER thing we’re not gonna talk about?

(yes the correct answer is yes)

god that’s such an american response to the problem though

glass can’t cause problems if it’s in a million pieces!

“yeah you can wipe those smirks off your faces…”

i wonder if there was ever a situation where a trainee actually drowned

and i don’t mean like amelia, i mean some poor kid who just failed the test

merlin knows how to put the fear of god in people though!

and mark strong, very handsome, yes, very scary, also yes

he and colin both look like they’re 80 percent leg in every single scene

harry literally had brain matter smatter ALL OVER HIS FACE and still somehow had the mental facilities to be aware of those dudes, leave a bomb and dive out of a window (and then escape said dudes)

billy badass, y’all

“just get it done.” okay, i took back what i said earlier, maybe he does see her as more of an assistant, less than a partner. their relationship is weird.

the puppy scene!

“it’s a bulldog innit?”

YASSSS the golden trio

because of what happened with our other canon charlie has become a weird character for me to watch, like, yeah, i “watch” charlie be himself in tss but the charlie i “see” is like—”our” charlie.

“bollocks!” and then he just runs with jb in his vest, makes me smile

aannddd we see valentine’s super cool factory

harry your hair gets so long <3

“water!” wow, who wants to bet that the fact he was instantly screaming means that maybe he’s gonna have some stuff to talk about in therapy later

roxy baby i’m sorry they made you hold the balloon and have to trust these dumbasses to not shoot you on accident

i would trust roxy to not shoot me

i love, love love valentine’s house

it’s gorgeous

set design is always such a cool way for filmmakers to include details about a character using pure aesthetics and i’m such a slut for it

tilde!

see also: one of the characters done the WORST by these movies imo!

the fact that she not only says no, she says no with enthusiasm and gets blatantly pissed, is one of the best insights we get into tilde’s character and then it just—gets wasted

like it takes three steps and then gets mowed down in the hallway like her guards

i would never be given the opportunity to be asked if i wanted an implant but i draw the line at having stuff put into my neck

awwww harry’s so proud!

that finger point “yeah, see, be more like your uncle”

merlin is SO TALL

“a bit much innit?”

he’s just—tapping a normal clipboard

… nobody wanna talk about how that’s a normal clipboard

anyway

i also love how they show him in professor sweaters for the beginning acts of the movie

definitely a softer aesthetic than one would guess for a dude who apparently did field missions sometime within the past decade or so, but i also have a theory that lee’s death directly contributed to merlin maybe being the man behind the screen as opposed to afield

because trauma is a thing but this is a FUN movie so we’re NOT gonna talk about it

“you’re gonna be all right. you’re top of the class!” this was the scene that made my mom a reggsy shipper

regardless of how you feel about them as a couple, their friendship is one of the best things about this movie, along with their dynamic with charlie, asjdnaskdjna WHY could we not have had a trio movie instead

eggsy you show-off “lemme just throw my arms up and dip outta this plane like it’s not a big deal”

roxy you can do it!

ugh, there goes my baby, off to have a near-death experience under merlin’s immediate supervision lmao

“good girl, rox, glad you made it!”

guys, they’re just kids.

i love this big group scene because it reminds us that these are just young folks, still

“my, my, you’re all very cheerful...”

“rufus, come on!” dude eggsy—and not even just eggsy, charlie and rox too--at least made an attempt at teamwork. you get points for that bro

but man, for all they know, they’re about to beef it in a very permanent way, i’d be freaking out too

merlin getting caught up in the drama

because again, he’s supposed to know that eggsy has a parachute

i think he wasn’t prepared for these two to get that close to not making it and that’s why we see him break face and drop his mug

*WHAM*

i HATE the sound of them landing

it’s not like you can hear bones breaking but it hurts me, guys

and then there were three

plus one daddy long legs quartermaster

“if you have a complaint you come here and you whisper it in my ear.”

yes SIR

“you need to take that chip off your shoulder.”

merlin coming’ in with the tough love portion of the kingsman core squad

there’s no reason for me to think harry’s persona was inspired by cruella de ville somehow but i do anyway

she reveals the mcdonald’s and valentine is just :D

idk if he was expecting a specific reaction or was just excited to see a reaction period

valentine is definitely a fun villain, which, given the tone of the movie, makes sense, it’s all supposed to be fun

one of the reasons i love kingsman is that it’s like, this golden ray of goofy cinematic fuckery in a world of grim!dark remakes and other superhero/spy films who are presented as more serious stories

“and thank you for such a—happy, meal.”

harry got a puppy smile

but see, then, here at his house he’s a lot more relaxed with gazelle! like, patting her butt, etc.

maybe what we see of their relationship is dependent on setting, because valentine himself has it compartmentalized?

perrrrrrhaps

“and i am never, EVER GOING TO AGREE!”

tilde, you deserved better, and i think all the weird hate you get from our ohana is unfair

you don’t twist a runner’s ankle before the race starts and then get mad when they don’t win

your story was mishandled from the beginning

asmr: hanging out with the golden trio watching worrying news in the kingsman trainee bunker room

the way he says “biblical sense” lmao

i have never been able to figure out if the way he says that line is supposed to infer spiritual respect, or lack of it, but i might be looking too into it

“it’s an acquired taste, mate.”

what—what would you even do if you were at a club and three people as hot as taron, ed and sophie all came up and start talking to you at the same time

like i know the target got up and left pretty quick because of the training exercise

but i’d be doing it because i’m ugly and if three hot people are all talking me up at a bar something is Bad and Wrong

which—the CAHONES on both eggsy and roxy

they both literally said “yeah i’m willing to die for this organization that hasn’t even given me a permanent place yet, what of it”

look at harry’s dimples in this scene, he is fighting a huge grin, he’s SO PROUD

i know that charlie’s response is supposed to be just more fodder into the “charlie hesketh is a tool” fire

but given that i’m not unconvinced that his home life wasn’t super shitty, like—

idk, this makes this scene a lot less fun to me. it makes it sad.

like, maybe charlie didn’t even want to be there deep down, maybe this was all for like, arthur, or his dad, or some other person he looked up to

and the way merlin looks when he tells charlie to go home, the way that he’s kinda grimacing? i’m wondering if he’s along the same kind of feeling. he’d know more about charlie’s history

have i also mentioned how much i love harry’s war room?

“YES harry!”

an evil plan is being born!

“true nobility is being superior to your former self.”

eggsy is still in his club clothes, so like—has he slept? y’all let those kids sleep after fucking drugging them, right? … guys?

“—when one is popping ones cherry.”

and eggsy is just CHEESING he is SO EXCITED

am i the only one who wants to learn more about the store clerk guy though?

he’s like the one person around who’s legit just there to run the shop

has no idea about any of the spy stuff happening

his name is donald, he’s married with three children and has two spaniels he loves

“THAT is sick.”

i would KILL for this room.

i don’t need anything in here for any reason but still

foreshadowing, foreshadowing, foreshadowing, more foreshadowing—

harry is such a NERD

“put it back, eggsy.”

the amount of self-control it would take to not have a sudden change in expression in that moment, omg

i wonder how THAT gets trained up in kingsman

“i guarantee it.” ha, get it, it’s a reference to that one commercial

“y’all—talk so funny.”

and this all means that they had a contact at that hat shop and got all that info to them before valentine got there, and somehow made sure he did end up buying a hat that they could also successfully put a bug on, how deep does this goooooo

“jack bauer?”

it says a lot about eggsy that out of all the jb’s it could’ve been, it was jack

uggghhhhhh of course they HAD to do this scene with eggsy with arthur

obviously harry couldn’t do it

i just think most of us would NOT be fans of arthur at this point in the movie, we’re all rooting for eggsy, like, he needs this moment with this other character because we gotta drive home that he’s an asshole

also—would have absolutely failed that test

and i’m not sorry at all

“welcome to kingsman--lancelot.”

i was really happy that it was a female agent who ended up getting the handle

aannddd more echoes of past scenes, man, nobody can say that this crew wasn’t intentional with their cinematography

when eggsy rolls the window down you can see his chest moving up and down, like, he is MAD

dean you asshole

so no wonder he gets so pissed that the car suddenly decides “nope, no, we’re not doing this, c’mon”

this entire conversation at harry’s house is—tense

and you don’t pick up on it the first time, i don’t think, but uh

i’m seeing it now

harry’s not just mad, he’s hurt, and eggsy’s furious but he’s also maybe regretting his actions.

it’s these two men who are rapidly trying to figure out their headspaces and trying to figure out how to navigate this situation with each other

and the way eggsy tries to apologize ;-;

kentucky is a beautiful state, actually

ohhhhhh y’alllll

we’re at the churrrccchhhh

we’re gettin’ closer to the coolest part of the movieeeee

it’s telling that gazelle was trying to make sure that they’d be safe

“… so hail satan, and have a lovely afternoon madame.”

the most metal lines colin firth has ever uttered on camera

the siren noise after it’s switched on bothers me in a way i can’t quite articulate

it might be because i have silent hill-colored trauma, who knows

FREEEEEE

BIIIRRRDDDDDDD

THE GREATEST ACTION TRACKING SHOT IN THE HISTORY OF CINEMA

but then eggsy and merlin are reacting aaaanndddd it’s—a lot less fun

because you realize that they’re watching their bro mercilessly slaughter innocent people and not stopping

and still not stopping

and still not stopping

but plot twist, i’m really glad they kept the track going, because if they’d suddenly picked *this* part of the scene to get serious, that would’ve brought the mood down so low that i don’t think there would’ve been any bouncing back

i just

how do people exist who aren’t attracted to harry hart

that man is a machine

and colin worked so hard to be able to do the scene himself, and that work SHOWS, that man cuts a FIGURE

i don’t know how they managed to somber it up just the right amount, either? maybe because they waited for the “fun action sequence” to be over so there wouldn’t need to be noise that had to be masked by a fun rock track?

“… what did you do to me.”

i cannot imagine what harry was feeling in that moment.

the way he spoke it was like he didn’t even have time to be afraid to die

“that tends to happen when you shoot somebody in the head. feels good, right?”

“no, it does not feel good!”

i love that exchange because we normally hear the opposite.

also—whiplash.

mark has this way of expressing grief without showing any—blatant signs.

like merlin’s not especially tearful, or crying, but his eyes look MASSIVE. and SAD. and he has just the tiiiiiniest tremor in his voice.

and eggsy, dude, like, we’ve all had it come on us really quick and suddenly it’s like your chest is pumping like a piston and when did it get so hard to breathe?

ARTHUR you REPULSE me

like look at how egssy’s shoulders sag when he realizes that arthur isn’t on his team

and in a way, this is eggsy’s final test as a kingsman trainee, imo

do you realize how quickly he had to assess what was happening and figure out what to do, all without arthur noticing?

“you are all alone. it is all up to you. remember all you have learned. good luck.”

it’s a very—almost horror-esque situation from that pov

and he passed with flying colors to go on his first true mission, because after he puts on the suit, that’s his visual cue of graduating, if that makes sense

that’s the knight putting on his armor.

“i’d rather be with harry. thanks.”

“so be it.”

*click*

me: *laughing at arthur’s big dumb stupid head*

… man i’d love a replica of that decanter and glasses set though

not to mention that eggsy recognized the flaws in arthur’s character and weaponized them, which is a whole other level of shit that isn’t necessarily easy; he knew that arthur carried the kind of pride that would leave him open

god, he looks so exhausted though when rox has him at gunpoint.

i think he was being pretty serious, about harry

sick helipaaaaaaad

that thing looks vaguely like a rock-‘em sock-‘em robot but in pieces though

more grandpa sweaters <3

man. you can see roxy swallow, you know she’s scared, but then she just sets her jaw and—

roxy baby you are the best i love you

i like the vintage vibe of the mountain lair

i think that’s another visual poke at the aesthetic themes of some of the older, og spy flicks out there

merlin looks SO LANKY walking back to the plane for some reason??

he stays until the last second for roxy. that’s love right there.

“a bespoke suit always fits.”

which can be good spiritual life advice too but that’s a separate conversation

“what the fuck is WRONG with you people?”

and his fuckin’ disco ball

uuggggghhhhh his speech reminds me of so many… “public figures” that i dislike

even though it’s obviously a bad thing that the chips are everywhere, i appreciate that phones and such are being shown in a positive manner (like, michelle talking to someone in the park, people at a ball game taking selfies, people at the beach, etc.) because i get so sick of that anti-tech boomer humor tbh

and the big reveal of eggsy in his suitttt

A KNIGHT IS BORN

“how’s the view?”

“hideous.”

you’re allowed to be crabby baby, you just let it out.

“lookin’ good, eggsy.”

“feelin’ good, merlin.”

merlin is so calm heading into the fortress and i don’t know if it’s because he’s very, very good at compartmentalizing and that’s genuinely how he is at the moment or if he’s that way through extreme self-control and effort

he can rock a pilot’s uniform though

just like eggsy can rock a suit

they’re both so handsome, help

i also wonder how eggsy’s feeling right then

like, i’d imagine that the pressure of having to perform a role to literally save the world would be enough to distract him from the bite of grief

that’s—probably enough to distract everyone, tbh

i a hundred percent believe there are breakdowns we don’t see

i wonder if eggsy told tilde he’d spoken to lindstrum(sp?) after everything was said and done

like, that’d be some kind of weird foreshadowing in hindsight

this scene is anxiety-inducing in a big way so to distract myself i imagine roxy as a mech pilot

dude i’d totally watch sophie in a role like that, like, let her be in a movie like pacific rim, she’d kick ass

and now we have The Chaos

otherwise known as that point when Everything Is Happening All At Once All The Time

also a thing that doesn’t exist in spy movies: hearing damage

because like his voice is right in eggsy’s ear and without it he’d have a LOT harder time surviving

imagine being an agent, merlin trying to talk to you, but something either hits your ear or goes off right next to it and suddenly it’s just silent

SYSTEM FAILURE

YAAASSSSS

WE WIN

GGOOOAAAAALLLLLL

THE AUDIENCE IS DOING THE WAVE

except JUST KIDDING

The Chaos 2 Electric Boogaloo!

merlin with a huge gun: hot, also, very scary

eggsy is just 10000% done

“this is mine. i’ll show you yours.”

i wonder who e man was supposed to be that valentine called.

like is that a reference to a real person that i just did’t catch?

… elon musk? maybe? idk

eggsy slides like a gd anime character

when he uses the rainmaker, it’s just like harry’s protecting him from somewhere else

(oh—wait, technically kentucky, i guess)

“merlin, i’m fucked.” you can hear the anger there. not only did he fail, but he—and everyone else—is about to die

but this? this is the pinnacle of eggsy showing himself as a kingman agent

he was staring death straight in the mouth and STILL

SOMEHOW

REMEMBERED THE IMPLANTS

so i guess if i say that the moment when he puts on the suit is when he becomes a true agent, then maybe this is the moment when he becomes galahad.

*bobs head to pomp & circumstance*

i remember getting a huge kick out of how colorful they made this

because in real life you know a bunch of people literally blowing up would be like—DISGUSTING

viscera everywhere

no fun rainbow mushroom clouds

“i’ve always wanted to kiss a princess.”

ANOTHER knight reference, very clever matthew

mmmmm Do Not Like that noise

aaaannndddd *that* line

which—maybe that’s mr. vaughn’s sense of humor, or what he thinks the sense of humor his core demographic has, idk

but it always kinda rubbed me the wrong way

the mass brawl scenes are edited so like--jarringly compared to the other fight scenes in the movie

that’s probably for a reason

also, a showdown to the tune of something disco: kind of another trope homage

this shot of gazelle is so sick, i love everything about it, she is so cool

this entire fight with eggsy is awesome tbh

we got a little bit of what gazelle can look like in combat earlier with tilde’s guards, but now we get this epic showdown seeing her at her full potential against someone who’s actually a challenge

and the way valentine is shouting for her to kick his ass from upstairs and yelling encouragement lmao that’s how real friends act when there’s a fight

daisy ;-; ugh, that’s the visual gutpunch that makes it juuuuuust serious enough by reminding us of the stakes

which is why it’s fitting that then we see the Slo-Mo K.O.

and that smile with the fun little chimes in the back, lmao

and eggsy, quick on his feet again byyyy being quick on gazelle’s feet—foot—whatever

man, impalement deaths are always fun.

coulda done without the vomiting but that’s also one of valentine’s quirks that makes him different from a cookie cutter villain

aaannddd have a heavy sigh from merlin

that dude needs a full-body massage and a drink

“is this where you say some really bad pun?”

reminder: i love that this movie is self-aware! i could not picture a super serious kingsman movie! i just picture something depressing!

there had to have been a better option besides—this, for this eggsy/tilde ending scene

i’m not saying i’m mad it ended with them fucking, i’m mad that the extent of the joke was anal and that was it.

also the idea of my boss possibly seeing me having sex would have me a little more concerned about the hardware on my face, but okay??

aannddd the tapes.

gah, we love visual throwbacks!

we love being able to see that despite all this growth and change, family remains very important to eggsy—he hasn’t changed into a different person, he has grown more into himself than ever before! THIS! THIS is eggsy unwin!

… GET READY FOR IT

time for tgc! (and to get into my roanoke feels, maybe, this is the nexus where our canons connect)

the BAGPIPES

okay

i did not stop to consider how unpleasant this was going to be to watch stoned but we’re gonna power through it and get through it together

if i cry i cry

the way the music swells into the main theme <3

and the perfect reveal for our boy eggsy!

reflected in gold, looking sharper than broken glass

and SUDDENLY CHARLIE

the pacing in tgc leads me to believe that matthew had huge plans for this movie, and a lot of cool stuff probably ended up on the cutting room floor for time

i also love that they brought charlie back

i love his voice box and his cool robot arm

and i’m not just saying that because it made it super easy to blend him into our canon, either, this is like—charlie’s evil twin in terms of his new aesthetic, the contrast is really cool

YYAASSSS THIS SCENE

WITH PRINCE PLAYING??

*CHEF’S KISS*

like we are IMMEDIATELY thrown back into the gold parts of it all, like how physics is a little broken so we can do cool shit like have a knockdown drag-out fight all within the space of a small cab

i wonder what would’ve hurt charlie worse—being thrown onto his organic side, or having all his weight land on his metal arm if it hadn’t disattached

but then he’s up and standing so i guess we’re fine?

MERLIN! <3

otherwise known as the character entrance that literally changed my life

i try not to think about it too much or i get weirded out

ANYWAY

(and to think i almost never even saw the movie)

Sick Car Chase, Bro

and as an american, like, everything’s on the opposite side to me, it’s stressful to watch a little bit

“i seem to remember in your training you were rather good at holding your breath.”

man, that’s uh—kind of a macabre thing to say, merlin

just a little bit

i’m not even gonna attempt to hold my breath to see if i’d survive this scene just assume i’m dead in that universe

we all live in a kingsman subarmine, a kingsman submarine, a kingsman submarine~~

“not boasting, but i trained him well enough that even he wouldn't mess that up.”

merlin are you okay??

gah, i love that chest-deep laugh though.

is it real love if they won’t crawl through the sewer to get to your house in time

i love that harry’s house looks basically the same

i know they talk about eggsy not wanting to change anything in the novelization but i haven’t read it yet so I’m not a hundred percent sure what all is in there

and we still get to see him hanging with his friends, and his girlfriend, like, this dude is still all about the family

“wwwwOOOOO!”

i love this group so much omg

for as much as he’s galahad, he’s still eggsy

the transition in the weed bag looks super cool

… oh, i guess watching this while high makes the main storyline hit a bit different

welp

i love that poppy is an aesthetic slut and really doesn’t give a shit about anyone’s opinion about how she makes her space

like, “i want a big 50s-style diner with a gourmet kitchen that i can cook people in, soooooo i’m getting one”

it’s also refreshing to see julianne moore in a bad guy role!

not that i’m super familiar with her filmography but i feel like i’ve mostly seen her cast as like a good guy?

i could be wrong

awwwww jet and bennie!

there’s so much to love about this set

cannibalism and the fact that she bulldozed jungle to build all this aside (suspend that belief!)

the breakfast sceeeeeene

it’s so bittersweet, for obvious reasons

and it’s more evidence that he’s not super ready to move on into new territory yet, like making new memories with tilde that ring close to home

“i wish i could have met him.”

and the way he has to turn away, ugh.

eggsy. i’m sorry.

tilde, i’m sorry, too. you had good intentions, but they lost against his pain.

michael gambdon! the new arthur we didn’t know we wanted until we got him.

charlie had a moral glo-down, it’s fine, happens to everybody

FFFFFF his imitation of merlin lmfao

man, poor charlie, like

you wake up, you can’t make a sound, your arm has been blown off and your family’s dead

like his reaction to that entire scenario isn’t entirely unrealistic, i’m just saying

also LOOK AT ROX

omg everyone in this movie can wear the FUCK out of suit, y’all

man, i’ve gotten a few tattoos that were exquisitely painful—i can’t imagine how much it would suck to do it with literal molten metal

dude this means clara laid on her stomach and probably screamed at the floor as she got hers D:

this kinda—riffs off of hannibal, a teeny-tiny bit

like we’re so overloaded with the aesthetics and behavior of a certain character so it’s like, we forget about the much darker parts untillllll there’s a mood change and we’re looking at that dude’s legs, to the burger this other dude puts in his mouth, and thinking “oh, oh dear, ew”

i love eggsy in the orange jacket <3 snaps for the wardrobe crew across this series.

tilde’s face, omg, she was heart-eyeing so bad. and like, that little proud nod at her dad (who was of course being Like That on purpose)

and roxy, coming in in the clutch, you are tonight’s MVP

uggghhhhh i hate this part

because again, it’s just--a bunch of bad shit colliding outside of anyone’s control

(it was also really jarring seeing the war room with blank walls the first time i watched this)

like—granted, you should maybe not touch stuff that’s not yours, but…

like we *just* saw eggsy and brandon in a very casual, intimate scene with each other, how can anyone get angry with brandon?

this is all stress-inducing

i remember being in the theater watching this and feeling like i was watching some awful slow motion car wreck and i couldn’t look away

idk what other story i would’ve wanted to see but i was NOT a fan of Sudden Death For Christmas, especially concerning roxy!

and poppy is such a *bright* villain, not just because of taste but because of her personality, which is another weird thing to have next to the cannibalism

gaaahhhh charlieeee your arm is so cooooool

this shot is gorgeous and incredibly depressing.

what do you do?

gah, and the way merlin comes out of the dark, like

i probably would’ve drawn a gun on him too

“you think *i* would?”

this scene shows 1. how much he trusts eggsy to not shoot him, and/or 2. how good merlin is at compartmentalizing, because this is an even bigger blow than harry’s death, and he’s following the protocol like it’s an art form

i hope that we see some reference to this safe in the next movie, that’d be a cool way to tie the narratives all together

“i suppose that must be upper class humor. … i don’t get it.”

reminder, merlin is working class.

if you’re a ho for this fandom and went and bought this whiskey specifically because of this movie clap your hands *clap clap*

and they proceed to just get HAMMERED

“country rooaaddsss… take me hoooooome…”

another reminder: kentucky is a beautiful state!

i would love to tour a whiskey distillery, that’d be super cool

“shame it’s not scotch”

again, with his weird night vale clipboard.

who would win: two highly-trained kingsman agents vs. one (1) cowboy

channing tatum, ladies and gentlemen!

“y’all look damn sharp!”

i am forever gonna be mad we didn’t get more of tequila in this movie, and not just because of roanoke either, but like, “that dog don’t hunt,” whatever he has in his mouth sealed a leak in a barrel, and it took him all of two minutes to incapacitate both eggsy AND merlin? hello??

i’m glad we’ll get to see more of him in the another movie.

“you know why the measurement of alcohol is called proof?”

just dumping it on their laps, so disrespectful

“—and you can go fuck yourself.”

eggsy fucking just giggling.

these two doofuses

also it’s hot to see merlin be sassy ngl

“HARRY!”

these guys have been fast thinkers in stressful situations but as it turns out, people being unexpectedly not dead can kinda fuck with your day

aaannddd halle berry, everybody! i love ginger ale omg

(and so does merlin, he is instantly enchanted)

;-; this reunion scene

i don’t know how colin manages to be two completely different people at once

like there’s a huge difference between former agent galahad and harry hart the lepidopterist and i can’t explain it

i really, really hope we see at least one little hint at kinsman’s relationship with statesman in the new movie, i just think it’d be really cool

in roanoke canon, there’s an office rumor that the nanobot tech used by statesman was influenced directly by the same technology developed by dr. wernicke in the outlast games. i still think it’s one of my better crossover ideas.

also

god bless whoever decided to get elton john involved with all this?? because i was DELIGHTED

i love poppy’s wardrobe as much as i love her weird 50s-land in the jungle

i also really love the main statesman theme? it reminds me of all those fun epic westerns

jeff bridges! :D

champ vaguely reminds me of my dad

“can you imagine us in the tailor business?”

and he’s super quick with the questions. my headcanons for champ are all over the place but one that i really like is that he was maybe a sheriff or in law enforcement before being recruited by statesman.

aaanndddd pedro pascal, everybody!

otherwise known as *another* character that this movie did dirty, that’ll probably come up in this later

imagine being harry hart, not remember all of yourself, and suddenly your entire room just—fills with water

that had to have been so terrifying, and it was just as hard for merlin to watch (and possibly remember something unpleasant)

and like

that sounds like SUCH bullshit, too, like “yeah we thought if you came close to drowning it would help”

which, is that what merlin meant, no, but is that what harry heard, probably

enter jb the second ;-; <3 sweet baby

tilde’s trying so hard. i see you!

aha, penis jokes.

and all of the unnecessary weird festival stuff, uuggghh

there are so many different things they could have done, like, all of this is just weird from the get-go

first of all, whiskey striking out? hello?? saying no to a man like mr. pascal???

not realistic

the way whiskey takes a shot as he walks away lmao, relatable

and poor clara, like, it’s not like she was asking for any of this D:

hmmmmmmm don’t know how i feel being a stoner watching other stoners get this blue rash thing when i know it kills some of themmmmmmm

i love charlie in his newsboys cap!

poppy has a little bit of a point. like, booze is way more dangerous than pot, as is tobacco. like i would never advocate anyone try meth or heroin, but i think weed and some hallucinogenics get bad wraps.

seeing a dude get torn in half in the reflection of elton john’s sunglasses is the surprising bit of gore we need to remember that oh, yeah, the villain isn’t fun, she’s a murderer

uuggghhhh the TENT SCENE

and, look, i’ll defend tilde forever, but i did NOT like the weird marriage ultimatum. i still think it’s a dick move, like, in that situation either decide to trust your boyfriend or break up with him

the tent interior is super cool-looking

and like, man, he tried, he tried to bounce D:

/sigh/ work hazards, i guess

mmmmmm we don’t need any of what’s happening on screen right now so i’ll just sit patiently and wait for it to be over

and like, there’s nothing funny about merlin and ginger being able to hear everything that’s going on, it’s so grosssss, poor ginger has to have heard some shit before to be so nonchalant about it

everything about this sucks

and then he tries going to the one person who he needs the most and having to deal with him still existing in some state between alive and dead

his body is here

but harry is not

“maggots turn into flies, perhaps you mean larvae!” :D he is SO CUTE

but this entire conversation, with harry still not remembering and eggsy trying so hard to reach him through the fog, is so depressing

like, i’d need a drink too

*and* a joint

i’m seeing my coping mechanisms on screen here folks

the way he comes up with the idea is kinda ingenious though

like, he’s looking at stuff to make himself bummed on purpose, but therein he finds the thing he needs to fix the issue

harry’s smile when eggsy hands him the puppy TT.TT

and then eggsy just becomes a stone cold motherfucker with no emotions

“no one’s sick enough to shoot a puppy!”

hi, flashback!harry

and as SOON as he remembers himself, it’s like his eyes are different, something about him looks like it did before kentucky

“… eggsy.”

one of my favorite movie hugs

and eggsy has to stand on his tiptoes because harry’s so tall

like yeah merlin and harry’s reunion isn’t as overtly emotional, but there’s definitely a sense of joy and relief there.

harry my baby ;-; much better with the sunglasses (and merlin was so close to telling him he looked spectacular)

“now is that any way to welcome a visit from outta town, moonshine?”

he! tried! to! defend! harry!

i hate that jack got a villain story line!

we could’ve had something so much better and infinitely more compelling!

“hurrrr durrrr morgan you just like redemption arcs because you don’t want anybody being a villain permanently” i also like them because sometimes that’s better writing, y’all sit down

“that is NOT what i call a kentucky welcome.”

i love so many things happening in this scene, like

we get to see whiskey kick ass, like yassss gimme those sweet action sequences and give us some character development by showcasing his fighting style

and also NOBODY shits on harry for not being able to handle the situation. both eggsy and merlin were like “dude we’re still celebrating the fact that you’re alive tbh it’s fine if you’re not back up to speed right this second”

you can really tell that this was penned by british people writing american slang because having grown up in the southern half of the u.s. i have never ONCE heard ANYONE say shit like “i feel like a tornado in a trailer park” lmao

and poppy’s fun little death threat infomercial, so great

“what have you done to me you FUCKING BITCH” oof, that’s a mood

!!!!! gonna be honest i kinda forgot that bruce greenwood plays the president

okay but save lives, legalize isn’t an entirely bad idea tbh

hnnnnnnng the scenes about people not being able to get into the hospital hits different in the year of our lord 2020 huh

… y’all i’m being weirded out by all this hospital scenes, this is unpleasant

i, too, wish i could pull a tequila and just be slipped into a chilly coma until shit wasn’t so fucked up

“the fact is, this presidency has won the war on drugs!”

THIS SCENE!

look, y’all can come into my inbox and call me a pothead, or a lazy stoner, or some third insult, but this dude’s VP is bringing up some very, VERY important points when it comes to any kind of discussion about drug use in the u.s.

am i drug-friendly, sure, but i’m more friendly to the notion that we stop demonizing addicts/users

harry looks fucking SCANDALIZED when he sees champ spit into his spittoon thing

i don’t think whiskey even brought up harry not being ready to return to the field in an insulting manner, he literally just saw him get his ass beat in a bar, but eggsy’s faith and loyalty are up there in the category of unstoppable force/immovable object, so here we are

am i the only one curious about the whole charlie x clara thing? because he’s definitely grown up a bit by tgc, and i wanna know how much of that might be because of clara

and he MISSES, e for effort harry

“so sorry about this—“ WHAM

and now that guy can say colin firth busted his face with a fire extinguisher, which is very cool

“*you’re* wu ting feng?” “… yes?”

“you motherFUCKER” ohhhhhh charlie maaaaaad

ginger and merlin though, #couplegoals

the only person more pissed off about the hallucinations than everyone else is harry

imagine remembering that you’re one of the top people in your field and you just keep seeing imaginary butterflies everywhere

like, yeah, i’d be pissed at not being able to do what i knew i was capable of, too

if it wasn’t careening towards a random retirement center, getting stuck in a wildly rotating gondola thing could be fun

nice tuesday afternoon activity

i would loved to have seen more galahad/whiskey field stuff

“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me—“

meanwhile, in the continuing adventures of eggsy and jack: shit goes from bad to worse like a formal spiral only going downward

their expressions as their both just SCREAMING always make me laugh

”that’s the first decent shit i’ve had in three weeks.” <- as does that line, that old dude’s just telling it like it is

eggsy’s comment about the antidote just reminds me of when boromir looks a the ring and says something like “all this for such a tiny thing”

dun dun DUN what are THOSE? hints that whiskey may not be who we think he is??

great. so excited about that. i say, rolling my eyes into the sun

“i’ll fix their wagons.” no one says that matthew!

i. love. this. scene. because now we get cool gun tricks AND the second most metal thing that happens with a lasso in this movie (we’re coming up on the most metal thing)

like please please PLEASE show us more lasso tricks in the statesman movie

“well thank fuckin’ christ i didn’t need any backup.” i wonder if whiskey’s acting angrier than he actually is to throw off the fact that he might’ve caught harry’s glance at him betraying suspicion

RIP jack

imagine the timeline where whiskey was never a bad guy and harry hart just blew a dude away for NO REASON

now THAT would be an interesting movie

because harry and eggsy, for all they went through in the first film, never had a conflict where it was harry in the position of mangling the ropes up

but of course eggsy would never, never tell merlin what happened because he’s still ultimately on harry’s team

damn, charlie, literally blowing up your girlfriend seems kinda extreme

“THIS is vital!”

and here we get to see the biggest difference between merlin and ginger

now, i know there’s extra stuff in the novelization about their relationship and i can’t talk about it because i have no idea what’s in the book

but!

i DO still headcanon as merlin quitting fieldwork after lee’s death

his comment is either what he genuinely believes, or maybe what he fashioned his beliefs into after stepping down from his field role, and ginger is just as sincere in her desire to break into that aspect of working for statesman

it’s like seeing the same character but in two points in time, and it’s really cool

that balance would’ve also been a fun aspect of their romantic relationship to explore but alas! ’twas not to be

colin and mark could both play slenderman

look at those limbs.

gracious.

also this facetime scene with eggsy and tilde T.T

that has to be so terrifying to watch when you know the steps of death and what they look like as they get closer

but it also puts a fire under eggsy though

“i’m leaving with, or without you.”

and of course they’re both gonna go because that’s NOT characteristic eggsy behavior based off of how we know he views family/squad

that’s how they know he’s being for cereal

uugggggGGHHHH and THAT FORESHADOING

stacey pruitt, attorney at lawwwww

hmmmmmmmmm

what does this conversation between poppy and the president remind me of

gonna just sigh into the void

and now we have harry and eggsy on the jet along with the BIGGEST LIE harry hart has ever told in his LIFE

kingsman and statesman aesthetics at least tend to be the same color schemes. lotta golds, yellows. browns.

eggsy, yeah, it’s a bummer your gf dumped you, but this relationship wasn’t very well-developed or written so i’m not as bummed as i could be

“… and in that moment, all i felt was loneliness and regret.”

harry shut the FUCK UP

you felt NOTHING??

you weren’t thinking of, gee, i dunno, EGGSY? or MERLIN?? your MOM???

like these lines from him just seem to come out of left field and i can’t even halfway suspend my belief long enough to come close to believing him

like mr. hart you just gonna be like that in front of jesus and everybody????

so, yeah, of course he’s on board with saving tilde! because he recognizes (apparently just right that second) that “having something to lose is what makes life worth living”

and i don’t know if they felt like there need to be some weird, deeply contrasting reason for harry to swing around to being in support? or something?

like

i’m forever pissed about this characterization and i don’t even know if i’m expressing my anger in a way that makes it easy to understand lmao this is fine, i’m fine, literally not a single person in this fandom ever believed those lines anyway, it’s fine

moving on

... and even if they WERE true then honestly that just makes me more excited about butterfly knife, because that means that harry acknowledged both the bad side of the coin, and also the side with rae on it (which would mean seeing her for who she was and also recognizing his feelings for what THEY were) and drew the ultimately correct conclucision that love! is! always! worth! it! let that shit in like a welcome guest in the home of your heart, and they will stay as long as you let them!

as SOON as he wakes up ginger looks a thousand percent done lmao

and the “process” that they use to wake people up or whatever is—interesting

because all it is, is trauma turned into a tool which is kind of a weird concept to see in a “fun spy movie” imo

and this is one of what i feel were like only what, two? glimpses we get into whiskey’s Tragic Backstory

and the other scene isn’t a glimpse it’s just straight up exposition in his dialogue :/

jack, i’m sorry, you deserved better than this as a character

i’m sure the name “silver pony” is a reference to something but i don’t know what

“lookin’ GOOD merlin!” “feelin’ good, eggsy.”

ladies and gentlemen when i tell you that i lost my pool-noodle mind seeing him put on that suit watching this in a theater, i--

ANYWAY

because now that i have the horrible burden of having seen these movies a million times

i know it’s more symbolic

he stays in sweaters so long, as an agent of the background, because he walked a man to his death

so it figures when he puts the armor back on for the first time in ages

he walks to his own

uuuggghhhh the minesweeper

i hate this

i hate it

i hate everything about the feelings i’m having while this is happening

*beep-beep*

“you move, we die.”

i HATE IT

but like, i don’t know, how preferable is this to the end scene we almost got, which was merlin dragging his newly-legless corpse through a doggy door?

because it’s been literally multiple years and i still have no fucking idea

they’re both horrible in their own terrible, awful ways

damn, matthew, it’s not often someone manages to come up with multiple versions of a thing and have every version be so gut-wrenchingly horrific, i’m truly impressed and completely disgusted

“do as your told!”

god

everyone just going through twenty shades of Bad Feelings in the space of fifteen seconds here in the jungle

and colin and taron do this thing where it’s like—their eyes go dead? like, there was a light here, it’s gone now

it SUCKS

oh

oh no

ALMOST HEAVEN

WEST VIRGINIA

… fuck

LIFE IS OLD THERE

OLDER THAN THE TREES

“… singing?”

this sucks.

this sucks this sucks this sucks

MOUNTAIN MAMAAAAA

TAKE ME HOOOOME

COUNTRY ROOOADDSSSSS

*THUNK*

and he even took off his glasses before he hit him, he had his end coming towards him and he was still a gentleman

TAKE ME HOOOME

COUNTRY RROOOOAAAADDDSSSSS

his EYES AT THE END

FUCK

… okay i had to get up and go for a lil’ walk

anyway

(and again, roanoke canon, fucking fixing’ shit left and right, because we’re the goat)

harry and eggsy look MURDEREROUS

MERLIN SAID KNOCK YOU OUT

it DID make the grand ending fun action scene a lot more satisfying

because like, without merlin there, that means harry and eggsy get to go full feral

poppy you big idiot you just robbed them of all their motivation to show any kind of restraint and now everybody’s gonna get blown up

except for those dudes who get kicked by elton john

which would be an HONOR first of all

(the part where eggsy’s using his gun and shield vaguely reminds me of the specialist, @bloodofthepen​)

and harry and eggsy just—they’re drift compatible! that’s it! the teamwork! the grace! the flow! my god!

eggsy vs. charlie: round like 4 if you count the first movie

it was also satisfying to see charlie’s new arm in action

we love fun robotics and gadgetry in this house

colin firth is really just not afraid to throw himself full force down a bowling lane huh

ugh, seeing charlie slam eggsy over and over again makes my chest hurt

the sound mixing on all these films is top notch which isn’t always a good thing T.T

ROCKETMAN~~~

that shit will never NOT be funny

a wild elton john appeared!

eggsy is indestructible, he can walk off anything

but charlie, charlie i feel really sorry for, imagine being attacked by a superior version of your own limb, i.e. something that you can’t exactly quickly remove from yourself, that would be TERRIFYING

harry + elton = dream teaaaammmm

“darling if you save the world, you can have a backstage pass.”

i love you elton john :(

i would have been the most OBNOXIOUS hype man in the background of the entire kingsman vs. poppy land face-off

“let’s make this fair.” eggsy you’re fuckin’ cheeky

and poor harry, all that lank just getting tossed like noodles

i thought the robot puppers were very cool

“for the record charlie i’m more of a gentleman than you’ll ever be.”

mmmmmm do NOT like this death for charlie

SUPER glad we fixed it

and another scene where i can’t stand the sound mixing T.T it makes me cringe every time

“i don’t consider genocide especially lady-like.”

and are we gonna talk about how merlin knew how to make heroin?

… no?

nobody wanna talk about that?

ugh that houndstooth dress is so PRETTY though

high!poppy is weirdly comedic for all of two seconds and then it stops being funny real fast

whiskey D:<

this is so dumb

this is all so, so dumb

“our agencies were founded to uphold peace, to protect the innocent—“

there’s that nobility again

is what happened to whiskey fucked up, yes

i’m not saying we have to completely remove that from his story

i just

literally anything but this would have been preferable

and then HOT DOG it’s one of my favorite shots in the movie with the whip where harry’s just chucking it away from his face like a bamf, YES

how great is this cover, let’s be honest

like, i’d be lying if i said i didn’t enjoy this scene visually

plus

HARRY GETTING PEGGED RIGHT IN THE FACE WITH A FRYING PAN

gracious

it’s one fluid tracking shot, so kinda in alignmentment with what we’re used to

some people get annoyed with repeated junk but when you can do it THIS WELL you can get away with anything

D:

but then jack

you did NOT desert that

yes, you were in dire need of an attitude adjustment but jesus

“this is for you, merlin.”

/ugly sobbing/

and tilde is all betterrrrrr ;-;

you guys did itttttt

COUNTRY ROOOAAADDSS

TAKE ME HOOOOOOMMEEEE

TO THE PLAAAAAACCCEEEEE

I BELOOOOONNGGGG

and the scene with jamal and liam T.T #wholesomecontent

poor tequila, after i knew that you would have a bigger role in another movie, i was less annoyed by the fact that they iced you so quick into the story

#FOX2020

“… now we’re brothers, working side by side.”

spoiler alert i actually love champ’s toast

“y’all shittin’ in high cotton now” WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???

and ginger becomes the new whiskey like she always wanted T.T

merlin is proud from heaven (or london, depending on which canon)

iiiiiii have mixed feelings about the whole wedding scene, which is probably because i take HUGE issue with the weird proposal ultimatum thing that happened earlier

but the way eggsy says “not a doubt in my mind,” he says it so seriously and i remember that tilde almost died

there was such good intention packed into this couple that was so badly written that i just

augh

“but it is perhaps the end of the beginning.”

there’s ***merlin! lmao i see you dude, they did you dirty

look

i was pissed off about a lot of things that happened in this thing but i was honestly hype seeing tequila at the very end walking into the tailor shop

like, yeah, i’ll stick around to see what happens in this universe but i’m gonna complain the whole time

GO JACK RABBIT

RUNNING THROUGH THE WOODS

and again, i almost didn’t see this movie.

… i think about that morgan sometimes.

hope she’s doin’ okay.

…

she’s probably not. D:

[ask-iamnotanalicorn]

Ya’ll have been SO patient as I take forever getting new updates done, so here, please have these miscellaneous arts I’ve done over the past few months that I haven’t gotten around to posting yet! (EXCEPT FOR THE LAST ONE, I DID NOT DRAW THAT IT IS PART OF AN ART TRADE WITH @ask-thecapricorncrew!!! LOOK HOW COOL SHE DREW PIRATE-ERA SALESPITCH!!!)

Picture Details And Explanation Of River’s Slowness Below!

I plan to get at least one IANAA comic out this month, but I have two big projects (a commission and first prize for the 1000 follower contest), that aforementioned promised comic, I’m working on writing my book a little every day so I can actually publish this thing someday before I’m old, I’m in like THREE roleplays on Discord (one of which is a High Seananigans AU with Salespitch as a merchant mariner captain), and I have my regular job every day. That’s not even counting the three or four other less time-sensitive projects I would like to do but can probably continue procrastinating on, although I really need to get that one story about Pitch Black written for my Patreons and...

HNGH.

So yes, thank you for your patience! If you want to toodle on over to the Discord, we’ll be happy to have you join in our randomness while I continue the struggle that is learning better time management and not stressing under the load of multiple projects, whooooo!

ON TO THE PICTURES:

1) 2nd Place Prize for Melody Song! She won a two-character flats-only ship pic of Soarin and Rainbow Dash snuggling with a good book. The cloud couch was my idea because it was obviously the perfect couch for two Wonderbolts and it was fun to draw. :D

2) 3rd Place Prize for SimonWL of the webcomic Weirdogs! He wanted his Weirdogs character Sammy drawn as a pony. He liked the lineart prize so much that he commissioned me the extra fee to get it colored and shaded! FUN FACT: Simon and his wife live in Austria, but she’s originally from the area where I live, so they happened to be visiting right around the time I finished his art, and I was able to give it and his toy prize (Discord) to him directly instead of paying exhorbitant shipping fees. We also just had an awesome time hanging out at Panera Bread. :D

3) @thehyperumbreon‘s kirin Anjin getting bapped in the head with a newspaper wielded by yours truly’s ponysona off-screen. I may have posted the lineart of this before, but he paid an additional commission fee to have it colored. This is very true to his character and also led to the creation of the BAP! emoji in my Discord, which is used very prolifically and has spread to at least five other servers, some of which I am not even in. I am very proud of my legacy in the world of internet instant messaging.

4 & 5) As mentioned, I did an art exchange with @ask-thecapricorncrew! We were chatting and I was like, “Man if I weren’t trying to save money I’d totally have you draw Sales in a pirate outfit” and then Blu was like, “Yeah if I weren’t saving money I’d totally commission you to draw one of my characters” and I was like “I have a solution.” She finished hers MUCH FASTER but I believe she liked my rendition of Doran (her shapeshifting pony explorer)’s kirin form, so it’s all good. :D And Sales looks SO DANG DAPPER. He is now the captain of a merchant mariner trading vessel in a small rp in my Discord called the High Seananigans AU. 

That’s it for today! Tune in next time at (incoherent muttering) to see what happens next on this blog, and HAVE A GREAT WEEK AND ALL THAT!

~River Babble

[smilingformoney]

America’s Most Eligible 3 Diamond Scene: McDermot’s

You turn to your wedding party with a grin. You: Since we’re all starving, what would you guys say to some McDermots? Our treat! Fiancée: Technically, it’s the studio’s treat… but the offer still stands! Han: That. Sounds. Awesome! You have no idea how long I’ve been craving chicken tenders. Bianca: Sure, why not? I’m hungry enough to eat one more carb at this point. Slater: More like fifty more carbs. Bianca: Shut up before I change my mind. Smiling and laughing, the ten of you hurry across the street and into McDermots.

The ten of you file into McDermots together, startling the handful of customers who are currently inside. You: Are you ready to feast? Omar: Not so fast. First, we need to get everyone in here to sign these NDAs. Fiancée: You really know how to suck the spontaneity out of things, don’t you? Omar: Just doing my job. While Omar and the crew pass out paperwork for the patron and employees to sign, you and your party grab a couple of tables. Eden: This is so exciting! I’ve always wondered what the inside of a McDermots was like. Han: You’ve never been to McDermots? Kiana: I’d expect nothing less from our resident rich girl. Eden: It has nothing to do with money! My parents were just very opposed to junk food. Slater: I hear ya. My mom was a total hippie growing up. She was all about clean eating.

You: Personally, I think… -A little junk never hurt anyone!

You: Honestly, I’d be happy if we could have McDermots catering at our wedding. Eden: You’re not serious, are you? Han: I hope they are! Bianca: Fiancée, please talk some sense into your fiancée. They’re clearly out of their mind. Fiancée: Hey, if it’s good enough for Jamie, it’s good enough for me.

-McDermots is a guilty pleasure.

You: Slater’s mom has the right idea. Pigging out is fun every once in a while, but fresh food is so much better. Slater: You say that now, but you’ve never experienced the pain of being a six-year-old who’s never had chicken nuggets. Kiana: Aw, poor baby Slater! Nuggets are the key to happiness. Officiant: And possibly heart disease. Fiancée: Shh. Let her have this.

Omar and a few crew members come up to the table with trays full of burgers, fries, nuggets, and milkshakes. Omar: Alright, everyone. The NDAs have been signed, so you’re officially free to chow down. Best Man: Finally. I’m starving! Kiana: I know exactly what to eat first. You all watch, stunned, as Kiana plucks a fry from the tray… and dips it into her chocolate milkshake. Eden: Babe. Seriously? Kiana: Don’t judge me! This is actually delicious. Han: She’s right. It’s like, the perfect blend of sweet and savoury. Kinda like Jamie and their fiancée! Han: …That sounded more romantic in my head. Eden: Han has a point though. You two are easily the best-matched couple I’ve ever met. You: That’s really sweet, you two. But my fiancée and I didn’t bring you here to talk about us!

You: We’re here to… -Celebrate you!

You: Everyone’s so focused on me and my fiancée, but we think you guys deserve more credit. Fiancée: They’re right. We’d be nothing without our kickass wedding party by our side! Kiana: Aww, you guys. Han: I promised myself I wouldn’t cry on camera… Officiant: Fiancée, Jamie… thank you for trusting us. It really means a lot.

-Chow down!

You: You guys wanted food, and we delivered! Fiancée: Yeah, everyone. Dig in before everything gets cold! Bianca: You don’t have to tell me twice. Slater: Seriously, though. Thanks for going out of your way to set this up for us. Officiant: This is Stacey and Eloise we’re dealing with. Whenever we need something, they make sure we get it.

Best Man: I’m with the officiant. This competition is about your wedding, but it’s great that the rest of us have a say too. Eden: You know what’s really great? This food. You look at Eden, who’s already finished one hamburger and is working on her second. Eden: I can’t believe I’ve been missing out on this incredible flavour my entire life! Han: Check it out. Eden’s experiencing fast food nirvana for the first time in her life. Kiana: I’m kinda worried we just created a monster. Your wedding party laughs as Eden continues eating, unfazed. Han plucks a handful of fires off the tray and shoves them in his mouth. Han: Man, this is the life. All the junk food we can eat, and we don’t even have to pay for it! Bianca: As long as you don’t mind stuffing your face on national television. Han: Eh, it’s a small price to pay. I’ll never get sick of AME. Han: Kinda bummed this is probably my last season… but at least we’re going out with a bang! Slater: I gotta admit, since this season is a wedding special, I was worried the rest of us wouldn’t get much screen time… Bianca: Always focusing on what really matters, huh? Slater: I’m just saying, it’s cool that Jamie and their fiancée let us share the spotlight a little!

You: Well, why wouldn’t we? -You’re as much a part of this show as we are.

You: Sure, the show is about winning out wedding, but they made it clear from the start that we need you to make it happen. You: Keeping you guys happy is literally my job, but even if it weren’t, I’d be glad to do it. Fiancée: Yeah. You’re not just out teammates, we also consider you our friends. Fiancée: And the way I see it, we’re all the stars of this season.

-Being in the spotlight 24/7 is exhausting!

You: If the cameras were focused on me and Eloise every hour of every day, I think I’d lose it. You: Sharing the spotlight gives you guys screen time, but it also gives us peace of mind. Fiancée: Seriously. You have no idea how helpful it is, knowing we’re not carrying the whole show on our backs. Fiancée: We’re the grateful ones in the situation. Without you guys, we’d be ridiculously stressed out.

You: Besides, we have to seize moments like this when we can. We really don’t get enough opportunities on this show to just goof off. Best Man: I think we could all benefit from letting our inner child out every now and again. You glance around the restaurant and your gaze falls on the play area. You: That gives me an idea. Follow me.

You and your wedding party step into the deserted play area. You: Who’s ready to have some fun? Han: I’m so game! Maid of Honour: This is gonna make for some really interesting footage. Officiant: Hey, we’re supposed to be showing America our fun side, right? Bianca: I don’t know. Aren’t we a little old to be jumping into ball pits? Slater: Aw, you heard the best man! It’s time to let your inner child out. Eden: Oooh, I always wanted to play on a playground like this! Mother never let me. She was worried about the germs. Kiana: Not gonna lie Eden… your childhood bums me out. You: Come on, guys! When are we going to get another opportunity to let loose like this before the wedding? I’ll go first.

You: … -Jump in the ball pit!

You back up a few steps, before taking a running leap into the ball pit. You: BALLS AWAYYYYYYY! One by one, your friends and party members jump in and join you, scattering plastic balls everywhere. Derek: Red alert, red alert! Dive, dive, dive! Derek buries himself in the balls, leaving just one hand extended upwards as a ‘periscope’. Eden: They’re so slippery, it’s almost like being in quicksand. Rainbow quicksand! Kiana: You okay over there, Han? Han: I’m good, I’m just not used to handling more than one ball at a time. It’s a little overwhelming. Jen giggles uncontrollably as Eloise and Lanzo bob up and down in the balls like prairie dogs. Slater: Think the staff will let me bring my board in and try surf these waves? Bianca: Waves? This is a tsunami! Might be too risky even for an experienced surfer like you.

-Go down the slide!

You climb up onto the platform and shoot down the slide, landing in the ball pit with a rattle of plastic orbs. You: Whooooo! Take that, gravity! Maid of Honour: Impressive…? You: If you think you can do better, you’re welcome to try. Laughing, everyone lines up on the platform to try going down the slide in different ways. Your maid of honour slides down headfirst. Bianca: My turn. Let’s make this interesting. Bianca positions herself sideways and rolls down the slide, while Han curls himself into a ball and tumbles down end over end. Han: Owwww! This wasn’t as graceful as I thought it would be! Giggling, Kiana and Eden sit down like they’re in a bobsled and slide down into the pit together. Kiana: Teamwork! Slater: Step aside and let me show you all how it’s done. Bracing his legs, Slater surfs down the slide standing up, landing gracefully in the pit. You: That is how you do it! Who’s next?

Before you know it, you’re laughing so hard your stomach hurts. Bianca: Okay, you got me. That was a lot of fun. Officiant: Sometimes you just have to let go of common sense. Eden: I was really missing out on McDermots. I had no idea fast food places could be so much fun! Best Man: Leave it to Jamie to show us the fun in even the most unexpected places. Han: I think you mean funexpected! Maid of Honour: Stop. Please. Before you ruin a perfectly good afternoon with puns. Kiana: This is giving me some killer wedding ideas. What if you have a slide at your reception? Fiancée: Oh yeah, I’d love to see Great-Aunt Gertrude barrel headfirst into a pit of plastic balls. +50 You: I’m gonna have to veto the slide idea, but I get what you mean, Kiana. If our wedding isn’t fun, then what’s the point? Fiancée: Couldn’t have said it better myself. Feeling happy and satisfied, you and your wedding party pile back into the limo and let it take you back to the mansion.

[theabominableblogger]

My Reaction to “Gotham” S5E2

In Which Harvey Continues to be the Best Goddamn Thing in This Show

I was a lucky son of a duck and managed to get this reaction while the episode was airing live on FOX last night.  For episodes 3-12, I will be waiting for Hulu to receive them because of an upcoming spring semester at college.  So for episodes 3-12, I will be in the dark until Friday or Saturday (so no spoilers from y’all).

Also, on TV, there are so many GOD.  DAMN.  COMMERCIALS.

AN:  I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

*Recaps shows the chopper*  OK, so who freakin’ shot down the chopper?

Oh, Tabitha...

*We see a whole bunch of injuries on Will’s back*  What the...

“They call themselves the Soothsayers.”  The Sooth- what?

“They’re digging some sort of tunnel.”  *gasps and reels back*  It’s Jeremiah!  ‘Cause he has a tunnel!  Oh my God!

What’s the tunnel for?

OK, never mind then, I don’t think Jeremiah’s in charge of the Soothsayers

“The second you [Jim] step outside that door, someone’s gonna take a shot at you, and if it’s not you that’s getting hit, it’s the schmoe standing next to you.”  *laughs*

*Jim hangs up on the radio*  Who’s on the other end?

“Four shells each.  Half a mag each.”  Wow.

“Will says the Soothsayers are here, which means we have to pass through Sirens territory.”  Ooh.

“She’s [Barbara] gonna be thrilled to see you [Jim] after what happened with Tabitha.”  Ooooff...

Wait, so is the Dark Zone like around Gotham?  At the docks or...

What?

So this is Robinson Park, OK... so this is where Ivy is.

Oh, these sets look nice.  Getting some serious Arkham Knight flashbacks.

Swore I just saw someone move in the background...

*Bruce catches a guy trying to sneak up on him*  Yeah.

“They came for help too!”  What district are they from?  Why are they British?

*jams along with opening theme*

*silently headbangs to heavy metal cover of "Ring of Fire” by Social Distortion playing in Barbara’s club*

*Everyone stops dancing when Jim arrives*  Oooohhhh... ooohh hoo hoo hoooo...

“It’s a police matter.”  “You know, they should really write that on your tombstone.”  *laughs*

“Drive right into this nightmare you’ve created.”  Actually it’s Jeremiah... kay...

“HAVE AT HIM!  RIP HIM TO SHREDS!”  Ooof.

*Panning shot of an absolute dark Gotham*  Oh my God.

*laughs*  There’s just this one random burst fire hydrant!

So is this whole episode gonna be them [Jim and Harvey] fighting their way out of the Dark Zone?

*jaw drops when someone shoots an arrow at Harvey*

“It’s a freaking arrow, Jim!  IT’S A FREAKING ARROW!”  *scoffs in shock*

Whooooo I remember her [the Day of the Dead lady] from the trailers!

Yeah, that’s the same... freaking tunnel

“The smoke... you [Gabriel] should take it.”  No.

“It’ll give you energy-”  Oh my God, is that Viper?  Is that Viper from S1?

“-see the future.”  What?

Or does Jeremiah shanghai this whole tunnel later this season?

“Once this tunnel is complete, we will have exclusive access to the mainlands.”  Oh my God, they are going to the mainland!

God, that guy [Sykes] just spit everywhere!

Sykes?  Isn’t that the bad guy from Oliver and Company?

“In Penguin’s grace, we will remain.”  Ohh, that’s a good line.

“What are the cattle prods for?”  “Fun.”  *scoffs in hilarity*

“If he [Sykes] moves, kill him.”  Oh ho!  Jim’s not messin’ around!

Yeah, that’s that same tunnel that Jeremiah [and Ecco] are in in some of those pictures.

AN:  Take a shot every time I mention the damn tunnel.

So is Gabriel Will’s older brother?

“Why would anyone be a cop in a world like this?”  “Well, the Halloween shop was all out of gas masks so it was either this or Sexy Nurse.” *reels back in chair from laughter*

“Let take ‘im, boys.”  CHEESE IT, BOYS!

*Sykes and his men try to take the kids*  Oh no.

*Jim comes to the rescue*  Yay.

*One of the car tires get shot*  Ooohhh...

*Commercials start*  OK... OK... so... what?

Wait, so is Jeremiah gonna leave for the mainland?  Like “Syke, I’m gonna get out of here!”

Noo... because his mission is Bruce so I don’t think he even wants to leave Gotham.  It’s the whole “I don’t wanna kill you!  What would I do without you?” mantra going on.

Whaaaaaatt...

What is she [Ivy] wearing?

“You have to believe me.”  “Forgive me if I find it hard to do so.”  COLD.

“It wasn’t me.  It was the park.”  *in unison with Bruce*  The park?

“The plants are my protection.”  ...OK.

“Maybe we can help each other.”  Bruce...

TELL HER IT’S SELINA!

“There’s a seed.  It’s growing under the oaks.  It’s said to have magical qualities.  When digested, it goes to the damaged tissue and bone.”  A seed?

Wwwhhhhaaaattt?

Ed?  Hello?  How are you?  Where are you?  Are you in the library again?  Why are sleeping with your glasses on?

What is going on?

That [library] looks like Oswald’s old house [the van Dahl mansion]

Oh my God, are we gonna see Ed peeing?

EEUUGGHHH we don’t need to be seeing this...

Oh my God, there’s someone in the frickin’ [bathtub]...

“There’s nothing there.”  *laughs*

Waaaaiit... what’s going on?

[Ed] You’re gonna attack him [the Street Demon] with a toilet plunger!  *cackles*

“Did I uh...” *chuckles*

“We’re gonna have to do all this again?  Guess so...”  *scoffs*

What is that place?

“It’s not safe out there.”  No dip, Jim.

“Maybe there’s still good people left in Gotham.”  Mmmmmm....

Yeah, you’re [Jim and Harvey] gonna leave three kids there [in the lobby].  All alone.  In a strange building.  Great.

Harvey, you’re a blessing.

Yeah, you’re gonna leave the three kids there.  Right.  Great idea.  Great idea.

These sets are fabulous.

“Hello?”  Blaaggghh!  Jump scare!

“GCPD.”  Take a shot!

Was that a crow [in the background]?

There’s just a bunch of random folded clothes everywhere.

*Harvey finds the dinner table full of body parts*  Oh my God...

Are those teeth?

*Harvey finds a plate of bloody fingers*  :0

Oh my God, freaking- they’re freaking cannibals?!?

*gasps when Mother attacks Harvey*

*has to leap out of seat to cool off when commercials start*

Oh wow, I love Sweeney Todd.

*ends up coughing up a lung*

So far, again, this feels like a foundational episode.  It’s just like “OK, we gotta work on this, we gotta make sure this is safe,” and yeah.

I wonder if the Jaime Murray character is gonna show up at the end of the episode or something.

AN:  You may think that... but no.

I also wanna know what kind of crack these writers were on for this final season.  Tze Chun had the good shit; I dunno about the others.

*gasps in disgust when Ed hits the Street Demon in the mouth with a wrench.”

“[Ed] You wanted to know where the Street Demons base was.”  Why?

“Aaand you wanted to make sure the boss would be there.”  Why?

“OK, how did I [Ed] seem?  Was I... confident?  Flamboyant?  Charisma for days?”  *giggles*

“Or was I conserved, kinda repressed, a little nerdy?”  *laughs*

Soo... did Hugo combine the two personalities?  ‘Cause the pushing up the glasses is a new thing.

*gasps when Ivy kills the men who were holding her.”

“[Bruce] You are so utterly naive.”  Oh my God.

“[Selina] She is paralyzed and has lost the will to live.”  “Good.”  What?!?

“That bitch destroyed the last of the Lazarus Water.”  ExCUSe me?!?

“Let her suffer.”  Noooo...

You can tell that Peyton List [Ivy] is just wearing a whole bunch of face powder on.

“I am feeding the earth these wretched creatures.  It consumes them.”  She has lost her freakin’ mind.

*Ivy starts caressing Bruce’s neck*  Do not prick his neck.

“Those men you killed were right.  You are a witch.  A murderous, callous witch.”  WHOOOOOOO- oh my God...

Hoo!

“What’s your name?”  “I- I can’t remember.”  What?

“She found me?”  “Who?”  “The ghost!”  The ghost?

“She makes me call her.. Mother.”  *reels back and puts hands in the air*  It is Mother and Orphan!

Wait, is that the kid?

*The kid stays behind*  It is the kid!  That’s Orphan!

Oh my God...

“The lights will make you dizzy.  And then you’ll go to sleep.”  Oh this is cool..

“Jim, I don’t feel so good.”  Wow, I love Infinity War.

Actually no, I hated it.  I was sick the first time I saw it.

*gasps when Mother sneaks up behind Jim*

They really do need to put a flashing lights warning on this.

*gasps when Mother fights off Jim and Harvey*

*Harvey tries to leave*  There’s an open window!  You broke a window!  Go through the window!

*looking through the Gotham tag on Tumblr during commercials*  Wow, someone wrote some fanfiction quick.

Oh wow, I love Ghost Adventures!

*gasps when Ed and the Street Demon find the Street Demon leader wiped out.”

[Penguin Was HERE] Really?!?

*imitates the guitar riff going off*

*Ivy leads Bruce to the seed*  Oh my gosh, that’s so pretty

*Ivy gives Bruce the seed*  I ain’t eatin’ that...

“One thing’s for certain... the seed will alter her [Selina] forever.”  Great.

“Some say, the darker angels of our mind-”  Great.

Also, yay for natural lighting finally in this show.  I love it when they use natural lighting in the show.  It looks so nice.

“What’s the matter, Bruce?  Don’t know if you can trust me?”  I don’t trust you.

“I don’t.”  “Good.  then you’re finally becoming a man.”  Ivy, you’re like his age.  shut up.

*Ivy sits in one of the low sitting trees*  OK, so if the tree branches just grab her and just sink down into the ground, this will be the greatest thing.

“Detective Gordon, your hand’s bleeding.”  Uhhh...

*Sykes and his men arrive*  Oh my God... monster truck!

“Wait just a minute!  Please...”  Whoaaa... who are you?

I don’t know who that is.  She [the Day of the Dead looking lady] looks cool though.

*commercials start*  Who is this?  Who are you?

Five bucks:  Barbara comes in and saves the day even though she still hates Jim.  She hates everybody.  She comes in like “I’m just here for the kids, not you.”

Oh noo...

“Did you [Bruce] find the witch?”  “It was Ivy.”  Great!  Alfred’s like “Oh bloody brilliant!”

“What choice do I have?”  Bruuuce...

“I want to help Selina as much as you do but Ivy’s a maniacal, cold-hearted killer.”  You met her like twice, Alfred!

But true, she is.

“So if Ivy wants to kill me, she can have at it.”  Oh my God...

Who wrote this episode?  I’m gonna have words.

*Bruce gives Selina the seed*  Yeah, you’re gonna shove that down your throat.  Great.

Is she gonna chew it?

*Selina starts chewing the seed like a gummie vitamin*  OK then...

It’s the Spiderman bite except in fruit form.

*freezes when Selina starts seizing*

“God, what have I [Bruce] done?”  *extremely sad face*

“I’ll tell you what!  I’ll [Sykes] take his head!  And you can have the rest of him!”  *scoffs in shock*

*gasps when Jim shoots the Day of the Dead lady*

Is that a monster truck?!?

My sister:  Is that a tank?!?

That’s a monster truck!

*both immediately at loss of words when Barbara hops down*

Wow, I love Hot Wheels!

*jaw drops when Jim uses his last bullet to kill Sykes and defend Barbara*

Wow... that just... came out of nowhere!

“Wow.  Wasted your last bullet for me.  Must be love.”  No it is not.  Barbara, how dare you say that?

*Barbara tells Jim she wants to kill Penguin.”  Great.  Great plan.

Wait, you’re gonna invite Barbara to the Green Zone?  Yeah, great plan, Jim.  Great plan!

*Jim and Co. arrive at the Green Zone*  Whoa!

He [Lucius] looks fab!

Wait a minute, is this [the Green Zone] that apartment complex that got blown up in the trailer?!?  Are you freaking kidding me?

They’re gonna freaking blow this place up later in the season.  God dang it.  Who did it and why?  Who does it and why?

We stan one future police commissioner.

“See you around, killer.  We have some unfinished business, you and I.”  Nooo you don’t.  Cool off!

Oh crap, is she [Selina] gonna be gone in the morning?!?

Oh my God, Bruce hasn’t slept in like 48 hours?!?  Great.

*gasps*  She’s [Selina] not there!  Did she go out the window?

Did she pull a “Dark Knight Rises” and back flip out the window?

“Bruce...”  Oh no.

She [Selina] looks like Michelle Pfeiffer.

“[Selina] How do you feel?”  “Different.”  Why are her eyes closed?  Open yo eyes!

“I’m better.  Even better than before in fact.”  Mmmmm no!

*Bruce hugs Selina*  Yay hug!  We like hugs!  We like some hugs!  Yay!

Oh my God, she’s gonna go on a murdering spree and kill some people, isn’t she?

*Selina’s eyes*  WHAAATT the frick?!?  Wha-

WhaAAAAttt?!?

*gasps when Ecco pops up in the promo for next episode*

*ejects out of chair to cool off*

AN:  Ecco, your man better treat you right or I’m gonna fight him AND the writers.

We’re getting WhaAAAtt??? WHaaaAAT?? 

Oh my God...

[fuckyeahkagepro]

Let’s Compare!: Kagepro (2011) vs. Digimon Adventure (1999); Conflicting Ages Edition!

Just for fun you know! because analysis is fun!

(NOTE: This is an OLDER post of theories based in canonically given information for both series. While for the most part the available information on Kagepro canon hasn’t changed as of 2016~2018 with the ending of Manga Route 2, please be aware while reading.)

Comparing other series’ GLARING TIMELINE ISSUES is also very fun!

You may be aware of these two Kagerou Project characters.

Their names are Hibiya Amamiya and Hiyori Asahina. Hibiya’s birthday is November 4th. Hiyori’s birthday is March 3rd. Neither have canonical birth years. ( IMPORTANT ) Both are stated to be age “11″ in Konoha’s State of the World pv. ( VERY IMPORTANT ):

“ 11 years old ” (“11-sai”)

Let’s compare!

I’m about to introduce you to a certain classic Digimon Adventure character!:

^ Jou Kido. 6th grader. (“Joe” in US dub obviously) Begins the series at 6th grade.

NO RELATION TO “TSUBOMI KIDO” BUT YOU KNOW YEAH “KIDO” IS A JAPANESE LAST NAME NOT A FIRST NAME RIGHT YOU KNOW IT’S NOT HER FIRST NAME RIGHT

Jou Kido:          Oldest kid in the series; considered reliable, mature, responsible,

ALWAYS SEEN STUDYING ETC. ETC. ETC.

( Why am I comparing to Digimon Adventure, by the way? )

( it’s very notable for being very real-world based in regards to its timeline ! )

(HERE’S JOU WHEN HE’S “ 8 YEARS OLD ” “3 YEARS AGO” BTW!):

(^ WHAT A CUTE) ( WHOA WHY IS THE PHONE GOING ALL WEIRD )

( also lmao anime proportions JOU IS THIS TALL AT 8 YEARS OLD )

( RIP HIBIYA THIS IS WHY PPL THINK YOU’RE STILL 9 TO THIS DAY )

( OK ANYHOW )

For fun, let’s see when Digimon Adventure FIRST TAKES PLACE! The date it starts on !!!.... ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

^ WOW I WONDER WHICH JAPANESE SERIES WE’RE ANALYZING

BEGINS AUGUST 15TH ..........................

( GOOD FOR COMPARING )

“ ... THAT WE FIRST WENT TO THE DIGITAL WORLD ”

^ btw that’s the very obvious main character ! (Taichi Yagami!) (“Tai Kamiya” in English dub!)

he’s 11 and in 5th grade !!

Let’s see what Jou’s age is in relation to his grade at this point in canon! Just for fun y’know!:

btw he has no canonical birthday EITHER whoooo timeline issues whooooo

NEITHER DOES TAICHI FOR THAT MATTER OK

^ WOW THAT IS VERY MUCH IS A “ 12 ″ TOO ISN’T IT

hey what is the Japanese school system like I wonder?

also what happens if we click that reference link pointing at the “ 15 ″ ?

Oh neato, ok!

hey what was Jou looking like in 02 when he was “ 15 ″ ?: (note: 02 takes place “3 years later” in the year 2002. because 02, y’know):

^ THE HECK WHOA WHAT A CHANGE

ALSO YOU’RE STILL TOO TALL FOR YOUR AGE/GRADE

^ the boy on the right (Iori Hida; Cody in US dub); did you know he’s an actual

3rd grader?

WOW IORI ACTUALLY LOOKS HIS AGE @ ANIME PROPORTIONS

^ boy on the left (Iori): still a 3rd grader; actual 9 (NOT-11 OR 12) year old ^ boy on the right (Jou): “ 15 ″, still in 9th grade at this point in canon (i.e. not in high school yet; HE’S STILL IN JUNIOR HIGH)

Digimon Adventure 02 is notable for taking place in the year 2002.

For fun, what grade was Jou in during the year 2000?:

from this old drama CD! (*note: spoilers for the end of Adventure within, but that’s where he says it)

Hey, remember when I mentioned JOU IS ALWAYS STUDYING?:

^ BASICALLY JOU ALL THE TIME

I wonder why that is? ^ also remember Digimon the Movie? this is him AFTER the first season when he’s now studying to enter JAPANESE JUNIOR HIGH SCHOOL

...oh, right, isn’t he studying to get into Junior high school?:

^ aka: SCHOOL IN JAPAN CAN BE VERY HARD

aka: regardless, YOU DO NOT TAKE JUNIOR HIGH EXAMS

UNLESS YOU ARE ACTUALLY ENTERING JUNIOR HIGH THE NEXT YEAR.

I wonder who from Kagepro is taking Junior high school exams very soon ?:

BECAUSE HE IS OLDER ? (WITH A NOVEMBER BIRTHDAY?) ................

I wonder who Jou was often canonically shipteased with by the way ?:

in a fluffy way of course because fluff is a THING:

(..... that girl of which was canonically 10 and in 4th grade)?

regardless if it amounted to anything thanks Digimon 02 ending

that’s a whole other TOO LONG story though

btw here’s another canonical 6th grader in Digimon 02!:

^ Miyako Inoue; (”Yolei” in US dub no we do NOT know where they got that name from to this day)

Wow I wonder what age/grade Miyako was in the original Japanese version!:

I wonder what happens when we click that reference link:

“  In the Japanese version of Adventure 02, Miyako is stated to be starting 6th grade at the START of the show, which in the REAL-world format of the Japanese class system would imply that she was instead age 11 at the start of the series. The Japanese version of "Knight of the Skies, Aquilamon" states her zodiac to be Gemini, implying she couldn't be 12 until at least May 22. ”

I wonder what month the Japanese school year begins in?:

“ School year starts in April and ends in [the next year]’s MARCH. “

i.e. Miyako begins the grade at 11 and ages to 12 around the May 22, following around April 1st-2nd, when Digimon 02 is stated to begin.

April 1st-2nd (Miyako is 11 !) -> around May 22 (Miyako is 12 !) -> -> August 1st (is when a lot of Digimon events TEND TO HAPPEN WHOO)

Let’s compare Hibiya & Hiyori ! Because this is Kagepro yeah !

April 1st-2nd (they are 11; Momo begins her school year at 15) -> August 15th (WHOO TIMELOOPS) -> -> November 4th (Hibiya ages to 12!) -> New Years (year changes) -> -> February 14th (Momo ages to 16 here!) -> March 3rd (Hiyori ages to 12!) -> -> end of March (school year ends) -> April 1st-2nd (next school year begins!) (Hibiya & Hiyori are in 7th grade, beginning it at 12!) -> November 4th (Hibiya turns 13!)

LET’S... COMPARE.....:

... DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M GETTING AT HERE

.......... BY THE WAY

I WONDER WHO MIYAKO WAS ALSO CANONICALLY SHIPTEASED WITH

IT OBVIOUSLY DIDN’T HAPPEN

BUT IT WAS STILL A VERY BLATANT UTENA REFERENCE:

^ I MEAN COME ON          “ JUST SHOUJOS BEING BROUJOUS ”

hey for fun I wonder what grade Mimi was in in 02:

^ well ok she’s TWO full school grades younger than Jou so if Jou is 9th grade in 02 Mimi was 7th grade and 13 ok got it !!!

...................................................................

DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY RE: AGES AND GRADES

IN A JAPANESE SCHOOL SYSTEM

IN “ REAL WORLD BASED ” SERIES

WITH VERY CONFLICTING AGES

TAKING PLACE IN AUGUST THROUGH MID AUGUST

AND ALSO RE ANIME PROPORTIONS

AND ALSO RE COMMON ANIME TROPES BECAUSE YOU KNOW