#but yeah anyway I had a lot of fun assembling this <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[carewyncromwell]

[HPHM] Tristan Cromwell Playlist

Tristan Cromwell is the youngest member of the Cromwell Clan, and therefore the youngest of Carewyn Cromwell's cousins. Despite this, being the only son of Carewyn's uncle, Blaise Cromwell, who took over leadership of the Clan after Charles's imprisonment and death, Tristan is also intended to inherit the role of Clan patriarch from Blaise once he becomes an adult. This is complicated, however, by Blaise's suffocating, controlling, abusive parenting, which results in Tristan being dreadfully sheltered, eccentric, entitled, condescending, and lacking in both social skills and basic politeness. Fortunately Tristan isn't completely hopeless. When Carewyn first meets him, it becomes clear to her that for all his faults, Tristan is an incredibly creative, yet lonely person who is desperate for love and approval. And because Blaise has always been the most important person in his life, Tristan longs to make his father proud and take care of him and the rest of his family the way he's expected to. This includes mending the rift between the Clan and Lane, Jacob and Carewyn. Somewhere along the line, Tristan internalized a lesson about love that Blaise never did, which was that love at its core is selfless and longs to make others happy instead of just yourself -- and so Tristan wants his family reunited not out of possessiveness like Blaise, but out of a strong sense of duty to and caring for his loved ones. Tristan's focus on the feelings of others may be linked to his strong interest in both creature and animal anatomy, which eventually earns him an internship with the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures and (later) helps him pursue a career as a Healer specializing in the care of magical creatures. Like all other Cromwells as well, Tristan has a deep love and passion for music. Unlike the others, though, Tristan's musical talent isn't best expressed vocally, but at the piano, which he mastered over the course of many long, lonely years trapped inside the Cromwell Manor with no one his age for company.

"This is Halloween (cover)" by Marilyn Manson

"Victor's Piano Solo" from Corpse Bride

"There's a Good Reason the Tables are Numbered Honey" by Panic! at the Disco

"Paint It Black" by the Rolling Stones

"Waiting on a Miracle (cover)" by Scott Shattuck

"Learn to be Lonely" by Minnie Driver

"Misfit" by Curiosity Killed the Cat

"Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day

"Shatter Me" by Lindsey Stirling ft. Lzzy Hale

"Because of You (cover)" by Stephen Scaccia

"Welcome to the Black Parade" by My Chemical Romance

[silvertsundere]

Silver Talks AniManga (21/04/24)

I actually haven't watched BA yet cause there aren't any (good) subs out atm and it's prob gonna take a couple days so if I have something to say about this episode I will next week but anyway

green - new series/new to me blue - finale/completed

Anime

Jellyfish Can't Swim in the Night Ep 3

that was a really good ep, helps that I can relate to kiui a lot more than the other 3 too. tomita miyu did a great job as her and the direction was really good too. I saw the "twist" coming early in the episode and when they explained the story for the play I figured where it was going but it was still very well executed. now that the main cast has been assembled I'll be looking forward to what shenanigans they get up to

Kaiju 8 Ep2

also a good ep, think I liked it more than 1 despite a couple awkward bits that were better in the manga like the window opening. which speaking of opening the op sucks ass holy, I wasn't a fan of the ed in the previous ep but I was like "well it's just generic radio pop it's not that bad" but they really goofed it with the op huh. they're clearly desperate to make this a hit in the west considering how popular the manga is over here too but getting mainstream artists to do your op/ed isn't gonna help. I mean look at mashle, s2 was a lot more popular and even the manga sales got a huge boost cause of how much people liked the op. shoulda went with something catchier like that instead but whatever but anyway, I also really liked the shinomiya scenes, she's one of my favourites so it was fun seeing her in action. looking forward to her getting more scenes next ep and showing off

Wonderful Precure! Ep12

one of the best eps so far, to me, we even got some sakuga crumbs. from when the designs originally leaked yuki had my favourite design by far and her being a cat girl was good too. she's also the only one so far to commit violence which is exactly what I was hoping for. she'll probably stop it in the future cause of the other cures but I'll cherish it while I can. it's kinda weird that they made her blonde in the human form but I guess it's so the transformed and human form don't have the same hair colour. I love her voice tho, not really seen her in any roles except hoshi syoko from imas but that's a good one. she was also beryberie in the previous precure season so it's a pretty big upgrade to go from a side chara to a main cure, good for her. but yeah, I figured from the start yuki/nyammy would be my favourite and seeing her in action now solidified that idea even more, I'll be looking forward to seeing more of her in the coming eps

Manga

Kyokuto Necromance Ch1

this new series is by naba fusai who did aliens area a couple years ago. gave that a 4 in the end but it wasn't a terrible manga by any means. this one felt a lot better tho, you can really tell the author leveled up a lot since the previous series ended, the art is a lot sharper and easy to read. the chapter itself was pretty similar to the aliens area one but more engaging. they did a good job setting up the basic premise and giving a decent understanding how stuff works anyway, the powers system is similar to stands so that's cool, it's fun to see other people's take on araki's baby. we're gonna have to see with the next few chaps but just from chap 1 I think this could survive for a good while

Shadow Eliminators Ch19 (Finale)

Despite the 3 score I don't got much to say about this. Unlike something like ichigoki or ichinose fam which were REALLY bad so I had a lot to talk about, or something like aliens area or super smartphone which weren't completely terrible cause they had some neat ideas, I basically have nothing to say about this. The art and designs are REALLY good as easily the best part about this manga but everything else about it was pretty generic and forgettable. I would give this author another chance but they would have to spend a lot of time cooking to come up with something more compelling than this. They would probably be better off and teaming up with someone else and letting them do the story while they do the art cause, again, that was really really good and significantly better than the average series we get better luck next time mr kento, may you avoid the U19 club

Astro Royale Ch2

hey that was a pretty good chap too, it felt a lot like an early OP chap which is cool, I said on ch1 that we'd have to see with the next few chaps how this would go but if it continues having the same energy from these 2 chaps I could totally see this being the next long runner in the magazine. ofc it could go south in the next handful of chaps but it's a veteran author so I have some trust it won't

[chirasul]

so, you want to assemble a music library with physical media huh?

lately i've been seeing a lot of people advocating for collecting and utilizing physical media for the assembly of a music collection (good, based) but then their primary way of advocating for it is.... by collecting CDs. this isn't bad per se (CDs have great sound quality, don't take much space, and are generally cheap) but i need to tell you some important info about CDs.

like i was born in 1990 don't get me wrong, i LOVED my huge collection of burned and purchased CDs (had like 3 or 4 fat CD wallets) but also CDs are the form of physical media with the LEAST longevity. unless they're made with gold, CDs are gonna last you like 10-15 years maximum. even less if the CDs experience a lot of temperature and humidity changes. why, you ask? the data layer literally falls apart, a tendency called "disc rot". i noticed this happen to my own collection of CDs, the discs are now completely unplayable and unusable. they aren't that old! but even my dad's old 8-track and vinyl record collections are perfectly playable, while my CD collection is now garbage.

i know that being able to rip the music onto your computer is probably a factor for using CDs, but if you want a truly sustainable and long-lasting collection, i'd try to collect vinyl records or cassette tapes. yeah, tapes! tape sales shot up in 2022 for some reason (the reason is Guardians of the Galaxy) and a lot of artists are starting to release on tape, so why not? tapes are really fun and a little easier to both collect and play than vinyl records

personally, i like collecting vinyl records because not only do i love having music on physical media, but i also love having giganic beautiful album art, which is super easy to frame and display. it looks super cool. here's a picture i found online of someone framing vinyl album sleeves

anyway, i'm not telling anyone that collects CDs that they're a dipshit or anything - I still have plenty of CDs and I still like to burn mixes for my friends and stuff - I just also think that it's not really the best way to build a physical music collection. if you'd rather collect for longevity than for ease of use, try something other than CDs. there's probably a lot of people who disagree with me about CDs, so if that's you, please email your reply to me and we'll talk about it.

happy listening!

[lisxdumbr]

anyway. spider-verse thoughts

i love pavitr and i wish he got more screen time he was so silly. beloved character. dear to me. i love his entire rant abt chai. that was so good. and hobie!!!!!! silliest dude. love the anarchist brit. i love how he like kind of does fuck-all in almost every scene he is in yet simultaneously is the most chaotic dude in the room. respect. he is also very dear to me and i look forward to seeing more of his dimension in the next movie <3 gwen is so tgirl btw. like her entire dimension is mostly blue-pink-white and purples???? and in the entire conversation with her dad it's all blue-pink-white in the background??? and her entire "the people i love can only know half of me!" like ?!?!??! ? AND WHEN HE ACCEPTS HER THE ENTIRE SCENE TURNS ONLY WHITE AND PINK?????? i love her dearly. gwen deserves the world btw. miles was !!! ough i love seeing his growth. going from being all cocky and confident to terrified of what's going to happen like. he's still a child even if he has to act as a grown up !!!! ough. spot being the most cringefail wet pathetic villain and then going to actually being terrifying was one of the best villains yet btw like. he goes from the most wet and pathetic guy to actually downright terrifying and i love that for him. #growth.

ALSO MIGUEL. Miguel's motif reminds me a lot of Prowler's? like it lacks that sharp synth-y sound that Prowler has in his theme but the underlying sense of unease and danger is so similar. i think miguel is going to be a villain in the next movie tbh. he seems kind of... i dunno. like he's holding on too tightly and believes the only right way is his way?

anyway. loved seeing gwen assemble everyone in the end :) peter and mayday!!!! noir and peni !!!!!!! spiderham !!!!!! hobie and pavitr and spider-byte!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's going to be so fun in the next movie i think. and god i look forward to seeing noir and peni again i ADORE them

You're so real for everything here

I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE HOBIE. I DON'T KNOW IF I SAID LOVE ENOUGH TIMES ACTUALLY BUT I LOVE HIM IN CASE IT WASN'T CLEAR.

The world. he's so. thehrjwhdhwgGACSVTSBRLORBRVGEAOFMFYNDIIHRVW vany you know I've been a goth punk for the longest time right. right. rightright you don't know how fucking extremely happy I was that there was ACTUAL good punk representation in my screen, since in the past few years it has been extremely hard for me to find a punk community in my city and I've been having to rely on my mother's friends from the alt street market,,, (though I've spotted some in art school ever since I started I think). Hobie makes me very happy, he's so fucking well constructed, he has references to the 70s movement and to the okupa movement (← that's how we call it in spanish srry if it's not the same in English) I love that he actually lives for the original concept y'know.

ALSO HAVE YOU SEEN HIS DESIGN. I AMJWBDJENSNQKNAKJEB I'm obsessed OBSESSED. he took out that mask and my heart dropped 50 floors and reached the underground. I love him and his style, perhaps I'm a bit too obsessed (I had a dream with him.. aheem) I need him and his pretty boots to kick me mmmhehhdjf sorryaboutthaticantevenactnormal

ANYWAY GWEN. I love her she's my most specialest girl ever. T Gwen is so real I can't believe there are people denying it???? The color palette and the way she talks about herself. There's a fucking TRANS FLAG IN HER ROOM and people are like "um she can have that flag because she's an ally not because she is trans" and I'm like. Amount of cis people I've met with trans flags in their room = 0. There are people saying that it's because Peter was the trans guy which I mean yeah, would make sense, but why not both. both is good.

Anyway Gwen's world is def my favorite, I love the aquarelle texture and how it's the world in which the color affects the environment the most. My favorite scene is the one where she confronts her dad, the way you can see her hair turning pink and blue and how at the end all the colors become warmer and GHHHFRFHR I love her so much.

Anyway I have a lot of thoughts I'm going to scream and cry. I kinda want a spiderverse theme but there are so many good images, I don't know what to use

[not-sure-what-im-feeling]

The Ivory Isle Pt.3

So yes. I said in the first post that part three would be about characters, but you need to know about the Carrows and The Guild first! I haven't brought up the guild yet, so this might be a fun surprise. The post should actually be a bit shorter than some of the others, so let's jump in!

Content warning for talking about death, murder, abusive or manipulative family, and running away.

The Carrows are really the only family permitted to learn and practise magic on the Isle. Think of them as a cross between the Medicis and the Blacks from Harry Potter. (Also I do hate J.K. Rowling, they're just a good comparison.) They would do anything to keep their power and status. However, a fair lot of them don't actually want to be a part of the family. "Why don't they run away or something?", I hear you asking. It's not that simple. The most harmless thing they'd do is just kind of exile you, and turn everyone against you. The worst they might do is track you down and kill you. A lot of Carrows that ran away have also had their deaths faked (by themselves or the family) or have been imprisoned.

The Guild is the group of people assembled to "protect" against magic (creatures). All of them are trained in Stormkeg, and some may have some level of practise in magic fields such as alchemy.

Yeah, this was a shorter post, but now you have the knowledge to meet the characters next! As always, if you stumble upon this and want to learn more, feel free to send an ask. Anyway, have a lovely day everyone.

Part one (basics)

Part two (species)

Part four (characters)

[obsessivedilettante]

Merry Christmas to those who celebrate! And happy Sunday-hopefully-a-three-day-weekend to those who don’t.

Please forgive the janky photo but it is nearly 3am here and I am Secret Santa Sneaky putting up the stockings, hung by the gas fireplace with some faint suggestion of care.

The amusing thing is that these stockings are mostly filled with things that Mum and I bought together, in person, almost a month ago, while getting the traditional holiday panetón at Cost Plus World Market. (They have the best flavor options!)

We also picked up a few fun trinkets while we were there. Mum has a solar powered waving Queen Elizabeth that she got years ago when living in England. It sits on the windowsill of the kitchen, and because we live in such a sunny place, I’ve grown accustomed to the click-click as her hand swivels back and forth.

Anyway, Mum’s version is basic blue. But we found this one at World Market that is gold! So fancy! So now we can have dueling waving queens.

We also saw a candy dispenser that is shaped like a sloth and poops out the candies. How can anyone resist that, especially since a major highlight of the family trip to Peru last summer was holding a baby sloth. We had a coupon for a free ornament so we also got an alpaca in honor of that trip, too, which is peeking out of Mum’s stocking.

The bulk of the stocking is candy and fuzzy socks (that will genuinely be a surprise, since this was something I bought on my own and Mum has no idea about them!). Oh, and dog butt magnets because we can always use more magnets, right? Plus, dog butts, heh.

Anyway, we’ve been joking around for the last month that we’re not really going to do much for Christmas. Splurge on a fancy-ish meal that will provide plenty of leftovers, and relax with lots of holiday movies. No family. No travel. No gift exchange.

We have a couple of big trips planned next year which is our main gift to each other (and they are Disney-adjacent, hence my crass capitalist choice in sock ware). Although, tbh, the biggest gift we can give to each other is finally feeling like we’re in a place of stability, something we haven’t had for over three years.

ANYWAY. Mum surprised me 3 years ago with a few things when we said “no gifts.” Then 2 years ago I surprised her with some inexpensive but thoughtful items (that had been purchased before we said, “no gifts,” which we eventually did say once I was laid off the Monday after Thanksgiving). Then last year, we agreed that yep, this time we really meant it, “no gifts” — and there was a small stocking with some treats in it on my chair come Christmas morning.

Then this year we said “no gifts” yet bought some fun little dumb things while out on our one true “Christmas outing” we had all year — we’re frugal enough, doggone it, and can enjoy the occasional pointless, frivolous trinket.

So it’s silly, putting things we already know about in a stocking. But I still got some glee at making sure I squirreled away the shopping bag we promised not to touch until Christmas, then stopping at Target on my way home from a work thing and giggling over the ridiculous stocking choices, and buying fuzzy Christmas socks on sale that I know Mum will enjoy, even if she only wears them once.

Oh, yeah, and we never got around to decorating because we just didn’t want to deal with sorting out the holiday boxes (that we’ve been meaning to organize and pare down, once our households merged, yet we still… haven’t…). So this is the only touch of “Christmas” you’ll see at the house.

But I have the whole week off, and we shall indulge our whims with food we don’t normally eat, attempt to assemble an Eiffel Tower gingerbread house (also purchased at World Market, because seriously we don’t get out much at all any more), and watch a random sampling of excellent and terrible holiday movies from various streaming services.

This is the first Christmas in years I haven’t felt vaguely (or majorly) depressed and anxious, focusing all my energy on simply surviving — and I choose to relish it, silly stockings and all.

[rarepairnation]

3, 23, 24, 25, 27 and 30? 💕

hi hi ria!! blessings of rain be upon ye...

3. how you feel about your current wip

i am RATTLING the bars of the cage in my brain!!! by that i mean the faramir goes to rivendell au is possibly my favourite best thing ive ever written i am just stuck in the mudpit of the current conversation and i would like to. not be there. but i really do love working on it it feels like gradually assembling a structure around a framework and when i step back and really look at it its just. jrr tolkien and i are having A Conversation. you know? like yes!! i AM transforming the work!! i AM deciding whether he would fucking say that and i do think i am right at least 92% of the time!! ive had the concept of the au in my head for probably 3-4 years at least and i feel like. well i was never really going to feel Ready to write it. and yet i am grabbing it in my hands and doing it anyway and it IS making me a much better writer and i can Feel it. yeah i love it.

and umbar fic/situationship au is just me pushing the bounds of do it weird/do it horny/do it self-indulgent and it is. SO MUCH FUN. i think there has always been a little block in my head stopping me from doing that i mean like everything i write is kind of like. this is specifically created to cater to me. but the panopticon in my head is a crazy thing. but step by step we are defeating it. this is like the next step up from just so long as this thing's loaded which was kind of my first time pushing those bounds and. i mean there are a lot of things about that one that i think i could improve now (this is my REAL answer to that "would you rewrite anything" question from the other ask meme) but it definitely got me here. never underestimate the power of a rarepair to make you WEIRD. (<- abby rarepairnationcore sentences...)

23. pick three keywords that describe your writing

what is this a job application? LOL just kidding but i do suck at these. um. atmospheric. character-driven (yes this is two words but it is true). interrogative (i am IN THERE with. either the original text. or the minds of the characters. shakes u like a snow globe WHAT is going on in your head).

24. how do you recharge when you're not feeling creative?

im really bad at this. like actually spectacularly abysmal. i mostly sit around feeling sorry for myself for three to nine months. until i eventually buck up the motivation and executive function to actually (re)consume a piece of media and more often than not it will seize me by the throat and lead me out of the pit. yeah this does usually work best with things ive seen before that will awaken a dormant fixation.

25. besides writing, what are your other hobbies?

going to the grocery store. doing my dishes. LOL ok when i am Not Writing A Novel-Length Fic i knit. one day i will start doing it again i want to make. the extensive sweater vest collection of my dreams. but i already have this repetitive stress injury because i type for eight hours at work and then come home and type for four more and i think if i started knitting again on top of that i would immediately crumble to dust. and um. is that it? that can't be it. i do calligraphy sometimes. WAIT LOL I BIND BOOKS. -> @hexagonspress

27. your favourite part of the writing process

omg ok i'm not sure if this is like my Top Number One Favourite but ive recently started really enjoying drafting out ao3 tags and start/end notes it's really fun to work out what things i want people to notice that i might wanna talk about in the end notes and compressing everything down into tags (to varying extents) is also just a neat way to think about like. what was i trying to capture/convey with the fic. e.g. whether i wanna be really wordy with it and get it all out in there or just have the reader go in pretty much blind.

30. share a fic you're especially proud of

maybe i'll never shut up about TO THE VERY DEAR MEMORY OF [ ] but like...you guys. i love it so much. it's so so experimental because the place in my mind that is wrapped around yancy becket is so....complicated and full of grief and fundamentally altering to my brain chemistry and i can only capture it through the world's craziest extended metaphors but i kind of feel like i pulled it off. it is like truly the tip of the iceberg of a LOT of stuff that is really fundamental to honestly a lot of my? lotr work? i mean the way i think about water metaphors...the fundamental dead brother complex baked into my writer's brain...it's all pacific rim in there. this fic marinated in my head for THREE YEARS. that is the longest from inception to completion that any of my (published) work has existed (unpublished is a whole different story. there's a longfic that i created at the beginning of my freshman year of college and has stuck around into postgrad. i mean. girl). i wrote the poem that each first line of every section is extracted from in my parents' house during covid lockdown. and then it just had to sit and develop and develop until the yancy becket death anniversary this year yanked it forcibly out of my head and into a fully-formed format.

fic writer's asks

[demonio-fleurs]

As a sewist who got her start in cosplay, I would love to hear about your handmade Spider-Gwen suit!

mfw i completely forgot that i ever said something about that on this blog (it doesn't help that the day this was sent i had mentioned/showed the suit to customers at my store so i was like "ah shit, did they find my tumblr??")

so yeah! i made a handmade spider-gwen suit before the pandemic. sadly, it was never completely finished. the only thing i had left to do were the legs, but i had also slightly fucked up the collar and arms so like, a month before the pandemic i decided to restart. and then the entire world shut down, i went into a deep depression that i am only just now clawing myself out of, and sadly my gwennie cosplay has sat in a box gathering dust for the last three and a half years. but lemme walk through my process anyways!

unfortunately, i can no longer find the instagram account of the cosplayer who inspired me to make my own cosplay. i don't know if i unfollowed her at some point (unlikely) or she deleted/got deleted, but in 2019 there was a fairly popular cosplayer on instagram who made her own spider-gwen costume from scratch, and posted her progress updates, which helped me out a lot!

but basically, i started with a simple spandex/zentai hero suit pattern that i bought from joanns, and modified it to fit my needs. my method for making the black/white contrast was, instead of just sewing the black and white parts together/hemming them together, i would use reverse appliqué to make it look more seamless and cohesive. you can see an early version of this here . i would make two versions of each piece for the torso -- one white, one black -- sew them together, then trim away the white and reveal the black!

it was HARD! doing a ^ turn on a sewing machine is incredibly difficult, and i had only a few months practice. but it was so much fun to troubleshoot, and when i finally got it "right" i was so happy! unfortunately, i only focused on the torso portion of my bodysuit, and not the rest (which will come up later) and once i felt like i got the reverse appliqué and the technique needed to do those harsh turns on a sewing machine, i moved on to the expensive materials.

for the fabric, i used yaya han's scuba hexagon stretch fabric in white , and then simple four way stretch fabric in a black faux leather for the black and a basic pink fabric designed for leotards for the pink undersleeves. it was pretty simple and easy to use, although very nerve wracking to make those first cuts! i also spent a LOT more time focusing on the back of gwen's suit, as i felt like in my practice run it didn't feel right. i was OBSESSED with the comics, so i spent hours just studying how robbi rodriguez drew gwen, how the lines worked, and i think i went through 3-4 drafts before i finally settled on a pattern for the back that i felt "fit".

the entire process of building what i thought would be my final suit was slow but rewarding. for the pink undersleeves, i basically made a simple square pattern, traced it on a massive swath of fabric, then went thru with puff paint and spent an hour painting the fabric! that kinda bit me in the ass when i was assembling the suit, as the puff paint was hard to sew through. if i had to do it again, i would just do the puff paint later or find some alternative method of making the blue spider lines stick out. once the torso, arms and collars were done, i sat down one day to assemble the entire upper half, and ended up with this! as you can see, it isn't the best and there's a lot i could have done the better (the entire gap at my arm pits and collar stick out the most to me) but it actually looked really good when i put it all together, i am incredibly proud of how the lines ended up, and how smoothly it all came together.

at first, i wanted to still assemble the legs together so i could have a semi-functioning suit for sakura con 2020. but i already had at least two easy/casual cosplays i could do, so my second plan was to do another attempt at a spider-gwen suit. you see, after discussing it w/ some other friends, i came to the conclusion that the problems i had with my suit stemmed from the fact that i took a pre-existing pattern and made modifications to it, when the existing pattern was not designed for that. if i was going to make a home made suit that worked, i'd either need to spend a lot of time w/ cheap fabric and pattern paper to make my own pattern, or find a pattern that could be modified to how i needed it to be without having the same problems. i then found this pattern on etsy, bought it, and began working on it. i bought new, cheap fabric, resigned myself to the fact that i'd want to do a full test of the pattern with the cheap fabric and not just the torso, and started working on it! i got the torso cut out and ready to go....

right as the world came to an absolute freezing standstill in march 2020. and sadly, despite making promises to myself again and again i haven't touched my spider-gwen cosplay since. i fell into a really bad depressive spot, lost my entire living situation, and just haven't been able to get that drive back. my commute to work is also significantly longer than it was pre-2020, so i am gone from the house for 10hrs a day and i don't really have the time i used to. i have made a promise to myself to at least start casual cosplay again in 2024, with the plans to revamp my 616 Gwen Stacy cosplay in the next couple of months (although that means having to trim bangs again -- uGH). i do not know if i will ever go back to a handmade spider-gwen cosplay, but if you want, you can always look at my highlight reel on my insta (linked above) to see the full process of me making my spider-gwen suit.

[v01d3nt1ty]

"Didn’t I tell you

you are a fish do not go to dry land

for I am the deep Sea." - rumi

(from GoOD Mornings with CurlyNikki)

oh to be able to express like rumi!

or to be spoken through. or however it works.

this hit me bc i am deeply connected to the ocean. my *happy memory* go-to is the beach, the pacific ocean, *my* ocean. my fav colors are like soft teals, pastel aquas and blues, deep ceruleans... so yeah i'm a mermaid but not like... not like the commercialized version that everyone buys into. if i die tragically, i want it to be by drowning in the ocean.

wtf was my point.

anyway it brought me into that sharp awareness of being. and it's like peace & love & comfort & oneness & vibing...

idk, it was cool.

i also really love language. i hate it, but i love it. i hate that we need it, it's so clunky and awkward. there are a lot of words to remember & what if you get them wrong or forget them or put them in the wrong order? (hello, autism. 👋) i used to write poetry, realized i sucked at it & stopped.* i've always been deeply interested in foreign language, even tho i do not have the attention span to learn any. (i took one yr of spanish and 3 of french tho, that was fun. tried to take german... studied japanese w a new-at-the-time friend who has been a friend for like 10yrs or more.) (also i really love.... intentionally arranged sound? & i love variety. so i basically just love the way languages *sound* even without the meaning. don't get me started on accents...)

but i think my deep appreciation for language comes from being neurodivergent, being frustrated at being misunderstood all the time. being afraid to speak up too much bc my thoughts didn't align w what i was taught. my instincts going exactly counter to what i was being told all the time. so i probably developed this desire to be able to correctly assemble and arrange the most appropriate words for any given situation. the right & wrong things... so much to remember.. omg so boring, so tedious.. no wonder i hate everything. er.

so. yeah. no one asked for my psychology, but there u go. i never told u to read this, it's ur own damn fault.

*so this is a memory story. there are two, actually.

the first is, when i was in 5th grade, so around 9 or 10, i wrote this poem & it got printed in The School Newspaper (!!! omg such a huge deal!) anyway, i had this memory, & vaguely remembered some of the words. then somewhere in my 20s, i found the paper & read it & i was *amazed.* it was phrased perfectly, didn't even rhyme, was pretty deep esp for a 10 yr old. i *cannot* remember exactly how it went, but if i posted it with no context, u wouldn't think it was by a little kid. idk how i *lost* how to do that. probably by trying to Be Good and follow rules.

the other is when i was in hs, probably a senior, probably 17. so i listened to a lot of 90's alternative & grunge, as one did back then. (98.5 KOME, i still remember 😂 i wonder if any of those tapes are still good?) so i wrote a poem that was probably heavily influenced by the lyrics of the time, smashing pumpkins, REM, nirvana... and i was v proud of it. idek why i thought showing it to my family was a good idea, but i did. & my grandma goes "this [part] doesn't make any sense. what does it mean?" and i'm like "it isn't supposed to mean anything..." anyway it crushed my lil soul and i had to Follow Rules again. bc how can i know how to People if i don't do things the way People do things?

oh wow that's sad. poor young me. *hugs lil me*

why do i share my trauma.

idfk. maybe so one day, even one person will feel less alone.

byeeeee

[mallowstep]

i think i saw that post lol and SAME let me be a tigerdove lover in peace

(also i don't think their age gap is super bad???? he is a brand new warrior in fourth apprentice, she's a brand new apprentice, so they have around six moons of difference between them. which is. not that bad at all)

yeah, it's annoying to me because like...it's so not true. i've pretty much blocked and/or unfollowed anyone who does that kind of discourse, but i know at first i saw a lot of it, and i assume it isn't any better.

as for their age gap: the post implicates that tigerheart is around a year older than her, when in reality...that's just not likely. i was working this out earlier on discord:

i got distracted when i came back, and i didn't really finish working it out bc at that point i had moved on, i was just assembling facts in my head. in outcast, i think hjl are...idk, let's be generous and say nine moons old. tdf are implied to be new kittens, but we'll leave their age hanging.

later in eclipse, they're minimum six moons old. they're supposed to be new apprentices, so we'll pencil that in. that puts them at...idk, three to six moons younger than hjl. because of their age in outcast, i'm leaning towards six.

i don't remember exactly when millie's litter was born, but it was...well, it was really early on, wasn't it? because she arrived while hollypaw was still a meddie apprentice. and i don't think she had kits right away, but...urgh, let's say briarlight is nine moons younger than jayfeather, just to get numbers down. it might be more like a year.

we know bbb are apprentices with ivy and dove, so even assuming the maximum age difference, that makes ivy and dove five moons younger than them, and...14 moons younger than hjl.

14moons younger (dove) - 6moons younger (tiger) = 8moons.

hopefully we all agree with my work, here. that timeline actually checks out against tigerheart being a new warrior in the fourth apprentice, so i'm satisfied.

so...yeah. no. it's not that big an age difference.

(also, like. the post itself frames things so badly. i'm sorry to do this but i'm kind of angry,

he became a warrior before she was even out the nursery

that's possible with a six month age gap. that is not at all indicative of problems.

Tigerheart has taken Dovepaw somewhere in the middle of the night where he says that no one will find them there

because they're in a cross-clan relationship. this is so gross. it's framing it like he wanted to isolate her when it's literally because they're in a cross-clan relationship. somewhere no one can find them is so they don't get in trouble for breaking the code. like. jesus.

AND THEN. okay. well actually before that,

this exerpt from Night Whispers

i had to check this on the wiki, but NW is two seasons after the fourth apprentice. aka, dovepaw is nearly a warrior in this scene.

the post is so bad. it twists facts to hate on tigerdove for no reason, and i don't...i just am so fucking exhausted with it.

like jesus christ.

this post made me so angry i actually broke my streak of ignoring that blog. the blog has such a poor grasp on ages and i just fucking. want to scream. y'know how i rant about how feathercrow isn't pedophilia and it's actually disgusting to do that?

anyway i'm sorry i try not to be like this and i try to stay out of discourse but. tigerdove is a huge comfort ship of mine, and despite what you might believe, my comfort ships are things that are. y'know. wholesome family fun goodness. if tigerdove had an unreasonable age gap, i would know.)

<3

[bonvoyagenoona]

Father’s Day Drabble | Hideaway / AMOMK

Just a fun little PG-13 fluffy drabble for Father’s Day in the Hideaway and AMOMK universes! Hope you enjoy! 💜

--

Junior: (stands in front of classroom, in front of a projector screen, where a title slide is being shown; clears throat) Hello everyone, and welcome to my presentation on (turns to screen and reads the words he’s typed) Why My Appa is the Best Appa in the World! 

Junior: (turns to Friday) Friday?

Friday excitedly presses a button on her phone to move the presentation forward.

Hideaway Jin: (to Friday) Ooh, nice picture!

Junior: Reason number 1 my Appa is the best Appa in the world is that he is smart. In fact, he’s the smartest man in the world. He tells me every day.

Yoongi, Namjoon, Hobi, Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook nod and murmur in agreement.

Hideaway Hobi: That’s true.

Friday rolls her eyes.

Junior: Reason number 2 is that he’s handsome. He is also the most handsome man in the world. People talk about his beauty wherever he goes.

Hideaway Namjoon: Also true.

Junior: Reason number 3 is that he is very nice. He works at Kim In-dem-titties and does insurance, which helps make people safe. Also, he buys me and Namu lots of toys.

Friday: He buys his friends lots of toys, too.

The boys laugh; Jungkook pumps his fist in the air.

Junior: He also reads my bedtime books with me, and he’s really good at doing different voices and stuff! Friday also does this. Oops! This is reason number 4. I forgot to say.

Hideaway Yoongi: You’re doing so well, my liege.

Junior: Reason number 5 is that he always makes Namu laugh, even when she’s cranky because she didn’t take a nap or she went peepee in her clothes by accident.

Namu gurgles.

Junior: And reason number 6 is that he owns Friday’s kitty.

The group is barely containing themselves, and Friday is mortified.

Junior: Anyway, here are more pictures of Appa, while he cooks for me, is hard at work, and takes a nap.

Hideaway Jin: Hey, uh, buddy, just, back on that last slide, uh, where, uh, where did you hear about reason number 6?

Junior: The time you found that lost kitty!

Hideaway Jin: O-oh?

Junior: Yeah, I heard you asking Friday, “Who owns this kitty?” And Friday kept saying, “You do, you do, you do---”

The guys lose it.

Junior: Anyway, here are  those pictures...

Junior: He always makes me snacks---

Hideaway Jungkook: Actually, Junior, could you go back a slide one more time? I have more questions about that last reason.

Friday: (whisking Junior away to the sound of the Hideaway gang cackling) Allllll-right, let’s give him a round of applause! Didn’t Junior do such a wonderful job? 

Hideaway Taehyung: (to Junior) By the sound of it, so did your Appa.

Junior: But Uncle Kookie said they had more questions!

Friday: (as they sit) I know, but there’s another group giving a presentation, right? We have to share our time.

Hideaway Jin: (beams at Friday) Mmhmm. 

Friday: Stop looking at me like that.

Hideaway Jin: You know what we’re doing when we get home?

Friday: Jin.

Hideaway Jin: I’mma look for that lost kitty. Make sure it’s OK.

Friday: (sweating) Jin.

The slide changes to the next presentation as the next group, AMOMK Namjoon, Jin, and Taehyung, assemble.

AMOMK Namjoon: Alright, well, that was a wonderful presentation expertly given by such a talented speaker---

Junior: Thank you!

AMOMK Namjoon: You’re welcome! (smiles) So let’s keep the ball rolling with our presentation, which is---

AMOMK Namjoon: Why OUR Appa is the best Appa in the world!

Everyone claps. Namjoon and Taehyung look to AMOMK Jin, who is staring at Hideaway Jin and his wife and kids.

AMOMK Namjoon: Hyung?

AMOMK Jin: Huh?

AMOMK Namjoon: You, uh... you wanna kick us off here?

AMOMK Jin: (still weirded out)

AMOMK Namjoon: OK well, I guess I’ll just cover it...

AMOMK Namjoon: First, I’d like to introduce the team responsible for this presentation. Obviously, we’re Kim Jihu’s three sons, Seokjin, Namjoon, and Taehyung, and his wonderful wife, Bongseon. We feel that we have assembled a highly expert team that is well-qualified to speak on the matter, and we’re excited to present our results of our research and discussion today.

Mrs. Kim: Wow.

Mr. Kim: I remember that dinner! That fish was good!

AMOMK Namjoon: In order to support our claims, we’ve devised an objective method of determining our appa’s parental style and effectiveness, known as the EEE score.

AMOMK Namjoon: The EEE score is made of separate dimensions pivotal to determining parental success. The first is Efficacy, which speaks to parental guidance through life. The next is Emotion, or the ability to connect with and empathize with loved ones. And the third is Enjoyment, which is the ability to experience and immerse oneself in fun, meaningful moments.

Friday: (to Hideaway Jin) We should’ve had an intro slide.

Hideaway Jin: Really?

Friday: And success metrics. Why didn’t I think about success metrics?!

Hideaway Jin: Are you kidding??

AMOMK Namjoon: As you can see, Jihu’s EEE score has only been on the rise as time has gone on, partially due to the relative ease of parenting adult children, as that more hands-off, relaxed style seems to agree with Jihu’s nature. Furthermore, as we’ve gotten to know Jihu as a person, and not just our appa, we feel we have gotten closer with time. We appreciate that he’s been able to share more of himself with us, to open up about life’s challenges, but also reassure us that whatever we’re doing with our own lives, we know we have a safe place to come back to to examine ourselves, work things out, find out way again.

AMOMK Jin: Yeah. We’re so grateful to have you in our lives.

AMOMK Taehyung: Couldn’t have wished for a better father.

Mrs. Kim: Aw.

Mr. Kim: Yeah, boys, that’s... that’s really, really sweet.

AMOMK Namjoon: Now, onto the areas for improvement.

Mr. Kim: Wait, what?

AMOMK Namjoon: We have targeted 4 main areas for improvement. If further action is taken on these 4 main areas, we project an exponential rise in the EEE score within the year.

Mr. Kim: Oh, is that so?

AMOMK Namjoon: Yes. Take it away, Tae-Tae.

AMOMK Taehyung: I’d just like to put it on the record again that I think this presentation is dumb and a waste of my time, as there is a fashion gala happening downtown, with lots of hot models to photograph and, uh, network with.

Hideaway Taehyung: Where is said gala?

AMOMK Taehyung: I’ll text you the details shortly.

Hideaway Taehyung: (discussing with the rest of the Hideaway gang) Thank you.

AMOMK Taehyung: So, the first area of improvement is to outsource home maintenance.

Mr. Kim: What??

AMOMK Taehyung: We are tired from the week when we visit you for dinner, and cleaning gutters or fixing the swing or knocking down that stupid bird’s nest that those birds insist on making in the guest bedroom window is not our idea of fun. Besides, you’re loaded.

Mr. Kim: Wh y pay for something we can do ourselves??

AMOMK Taehyung: SECONDLY, there is getting more involved in the grocery store trips with Eomma. We know the crowd can get a little crazy, so we’d invest in riot gear to help you.

Mrs. Kim: I wouldn’t mind the support during the week.

Mr. Kim: But you always tell me to wait in the car because people end up asking me if I am also single and also have a business card---

AMOMK Taehyung: The riot gear would come with a face-covering helmet.

Mrs. Kim: I like where this is going.

Mr. Kim: Oh god.

AMOMK Taehyung: The third area is increasing your bar inventory. You seem to be running a little low.

Mr. Kim: (rolling eyes) I wonder why.

AMOMK Taehyung: So, we’ve brought you some bottles of liquor (Jin presents wrapped boxes of said bottles) to get you started. But it would be greatly appreciated if you could add to the collection.

Mr. Kim: Noted.

AMOMK Taehyung: And, finally, we’d see a huge spike in EEE this summer if you revisited your boat conversations with Eomma.

Mrs. Kim: What now.

AMOMK Jin: Think of all we could do! All the fishing!

AMOMK Taehyung: And partying!

AMOMK Namjoon: And pensive reflection on the water!

Mrs. Kim: Absolutely not.

Mr. Kim: But my EEE score would spike!

AMOMK Namjoon: In conclusion, we think this makes a strong case for the argument that our appa is the best appa in the world, but I think given Junior’s presentation, we can agree that we’re just very lucky to have such wonderful fathers in our lives. 

Junior: Yeah!!

Hideaway Jin: Well, I think we can also agree that we’re lucky to get to be part of families as beautiful as you are. Thank you.

Mr. Kim: Well put, Jin-who’s-not-Jin.

AMOMK Jin: (stares at Hideaway Jin next to Junior, ruffling his hair and beaming proudly) For sure.

[ninja-librarian]

Can I have number 12 for Fendra please?

12: Is there a wedding? What was the proposal like? Any kind of honeymoon?

Okay, so, the wedding and honeymoon went well despite not having an auspicious start with the proposal.

In the name of avoiding spoilers for a later story, I'm going to skim over a lot of what happens with the proposal and just lead with these particular details.

1: Fenton has a very special ring.

2: Fenton needs to get said very special ring resized to fit Gandra's finger.

3: Fenton needs to pick up very special ring from jeweler from being resized, and asks Huey to pick up very special ring because Gandra's starting to suspect something is up because we all know how well Fenton can keep a secret.

4: Huey picks up the ring without a hitch.

Now, this is all going off to a great start. So things go horribly wrong, of course, because,

5: Dewey is Dewey. And a precious himbo-in-training. And inherited Della's impulse control.

6: Dewey. Puts. On. The. Ring.

7: The ring is now stuck on Dewey's finger.

8: Huey. Loses. His. Shit.

Huey: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?

Dewey: I dunno. Better question: why are Gandra's fingers so small?

Though Huey does bring out a hatchet at some point in a moment of wrath, no fingers are severed in the name of getting the ring off Dewey's hand. And it does eventually come off with both ring and Dewey unscathed.

Everyone has a new appreciation for the Lord of the Rings. Yes, there are many jokes and puns made about it. Yes, Huey is called Gollum at one point. After Gandra actually gets the ring, some of the kids call it "Precious" and say it in the Gollum voice.

This isn't even half the other chaos that is going on at the exact same time. This is a C plot to this story. Maybe even a D plot.

Anyways. After all the proposal is made and accepted, pretty much the first thing Rosa does is take Gandra by the shoulders and say,

"I'm going to do the exact opposite of what my future-mother-in-law did and insist that you not have a Wedding Mass."

Rosa got guilt tripped into it and somehow had never attended a full Wedding Mass, and had no idea that it would be a two-hour-plus ceremony. On her knees at the front of the church the entire time. (This, by the way, is inspired by my sister's in-laws' wedding, in which they were also guilt tripped into a full Mass not having a clue what they got themselves into.)

Yeah, Rosa was not going to let that happen to Fenton and Gandra.

They do, however, get married at the Catholic church. Gandra didn't think that she'd want to get married in a white dress but agreed to do a single appointment of trying on wedding gowns, mostly just for fun. Except she actually ended up loving it and found three different dresses that she absolutely loved, all out of her price range, and Minnie took what she loved from each of the dresses to create a custom-gown for her.

Yeah, Fenton totally cried when Raymond and Kevin walked Gandra down the aisle. (The three of them weren't much better...)

Violet and Lena were co-maids of honor, and Huey was the best man.

Huey took planning this wedding very seriously. The engagement ring was barely on Gandra's finger before he pulled out the rather large three-ring-binder that was labeled "Fendra Wedding" that he had been assembling since the success of their third first date.

He... clashed slightly with Violet over it. Because she also had her own three-ring binder...

Lena, whom both called upon to settle matters as the third member of the bridal party, was firmly "Team Bride and Groom". Violet and Huey could be arguing about something small and Lena would just shoot Gandra a text like "You want X or Y?" and whatever Gandra chose (even if it was Z) was what they went with.

At the reception, Dewey and Clara do a duet of "All I've Ever Known" from Hadestown, because that's Gandra's favorite musical and the song is just so "them" according to Huey. (And he just ignores Louie when he says "Isn't that the number in which the characters are implied to have sex during the instrumental?")

Fenton tries to very nicely feed Gandra a bite of wedding cake. She smushes it into his face. Fenton retaliates by smearing frosting on her beak, the two of them laughing hysterically.

They honeymoon in Puerto Rico for two weeks. Fenton had always wanted to go and see where his family was from and where Rosa spent most of her childhood, and Gandra wanted to go somewhere where they could chill on a beach, eat good food, and be far away from Duckburg. It was a win-win.

[sweethvnny]

fate

request yes | no

the breakup was unfortunate, but maybe it was always meant to be that way.

genre: angst and a bit of fluff, romantic, irl, gender neutral, they/them

warnings: drinking/alcohol

notes: this is part 2 of forever, click here to see part 1! also ik he’s not yet 21 so that means he can’t drink but then againnnnnn its just fiction LMAOO. this was rushed💔 not proofread.

“hold on- they what?” george said in disbelief. “they b-broke up with me.” sapnap broke down once again. 

“wait what? can you explain?” 

sapnap explained everything. from when you called him over to tell him something to when you drove away. 

“holy shit... that was a lot to process.” 

he scoffed. “yeah, it was a lot for me too.” he slumped back in his chair. “i think i need to get off- to uh- think.” 

“sure’s” and “take care’s” erupted from the call before he left. once he did, he shut his computer down and laid on his bed. sapnap laid there for what felt like years, in reality just ten minutes. 

he finally decided to get up to do... something. he wasn’t sure what he was going to do yet, all he knew was that he needed to get you off his mind. 

sapnap walked around his house, trying to find something to do. whether that would be laundry or maybe the dishes. after a while, he found a box. it was a lego set. sapnap sat down and examined the box and its items inside.

he was confused for why he had it, before it clicked. you two had bought it so that you could assemble the lego set and chat with each other, a dumb bonding experience that you weren’t able to do. 

fuck. it reminded him of you. 

“ugh!” he groaned and rested his head in his hands. he stood up and kicked the box in anger. 

if you were there, you would make fun of him for looking and acting like a chil-

it happened again! it reminded him of you,

out of frustration, he lets out a loud screech. it seemed like he just couldn’t get you out of his mind. due to that, he did the only thing he could think of. 

sapnap grabbed his car keys and headed to his car; he drove to the nearest convenience store. 

“will this be all?” the cashier said with no emotion as they scanned his bottles. “yup” he responded, popping the ‘p.’

alcohol.

he knew it wasn’t the best coping mechanism, but he’s going through some stuff. can you blame him? he mumbled a ‘thank you’ and walked over to his car. 

once he got to his house, he immediately opened one of the bottles of beer and chugged it down. he drank about a quarter of it and his throat felt sore. 

even if it was painful, for a split second, he almost forgot about all of his problems. a few more beers wouldn’t hurt. 

right? 

you drove for hours, unfortunately not finding any motels or at least a random parking lot. it was close to 10 pm and you needed to find one fast. 

after a few more hours, it was 1am and you finally found a parking lot. it wasn’t the best but it would have to do.  

once you got a room, you plopped on the bed. as soon as you did, you went straight to sleep. 

flowers. they were everywhere. it was so comforting yet so sickening, like you wanted to puke. you couldn’t really explain the feeling.

the flowers were specifically daisies, like the ones sapnap got for you on your first date. 

talking about sapnap, there he was in all his glory. he was sitting on a bench, just looking at the flowers. 

he looked up to see you. “y/n! there you are, i’ve been waiting for you since like, forever.” he said with a chuckle. 

you looked at him, baffled. “wha- what? we broke up what do you mean?”

“come one y/n, don’t make jokes about that! you know how much that scares me.” 

you were still confused. what is this place? why is he acting as if nothing happened? 

“anyways, let’s go! i have something to show you.” sapnap grabbed your hand ran towards the sun. you could do nothing but run. 

when you were close to your destination, sapnap covered your eyes. “no peaking! it’s a surprise.”

“alright, in 3, 2, 1- surprise!”

you opened your eyes to your motel room. your eyes darted around confused. “where- where’s the flowers? where’s sapnap?”

dumbass. it was a dream. ��

you stood up and used the bathroom. when you finished, you checked out of the motel. 

you drove to the nearest mcdonald's you could find and bought the cheapest meal, seeing as you still had about 2-3 days before you would make it to your family’s house.

you parked in the parking lot and ate away, not really thinking about anything since you were starving. once you finished, your senses came back to you. how you had little money to make through 2-3 days, how long it would take to get to your home again, and sapnap.  

you used to always buy mcdonald’s together. he would always order the same meal, he never changed. 

“i really need get him off my mind.” you whispered to yourself. it just wanted to make you cry on the spot. you missed  him, you really did. but this was for the better. 

right? 

sapnap giggled at everything he saw, whether that was his sneezes or the moving pixels on his screen. he was currently watching some random miniature kitchen cooking video he found. 

he sighed. “this is boring! is there anything else better?” he clicked on random parts of the screen, trying to find something different to watch. 

somehow, he found his way to old videos of you and him. they were just you having fun and making jokes; they were recorded before you started dating. he saw how happy he looked, how happy you looked. you both looked so happy and giddy he just couldn’t help but cry. he missed you, you were funny, kind, and so many other things. you were amazing. 

he grabbed his phone and dialed your number as fast as he could. hopefully you didn't block him.

after two rings, he heard the voice that always brought him comfort. "hello?"

sapnap couldn't say anything. no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't. "if you're not going to say anything, i'm going to en-"

"wait! no, please. not yet. i uh..." he struggled to find the right words. "uhm. can we talk? are you free right now?"

"hm."

silence. it was pure silence for what felt like forever. you were still on the road, so it would be pretty dangerous to say yes. but you probably wouldn't get this chance ever again.

"no. i'm still on the road, i don't want to crash." you said with a dry laugh. "oh, alright. i'll talk to you later. goodbye."

before you could say 'bye' as well, sapnap had already ended the call. now that ypu think about it. he was probably drunk or really tired because he was slurring his words.

no matter what it was, he was definitely not okay.

sapnap placed his phone on his table and stood up to go to the bathroom. he splashed water on his face, not exactly washing it. it was just to keep himself awake for later.

unfortunately, it didn't work. as soon as he sat on his bed, he fell back asleep.

a dog started to bark at him, it scared him to be honest. he kept backing away, trying to keep distance from the dog. it wasn't long before it started to grab onto his shoe.

he was confused but he assumed that he was trying to lead him somewhere. sapnap followed the dog to a door. it was white and had a golden doorknob.

he hesitantly opened the door and to his surprise, it was a long hallway with a bunch a doors. they were in different shapes and sizes, it was weird.

he walked down the hallway, examining all the doors. there was one that really stuck out to him. it was a light green door that had flowers and vines engraved in it.

sapnap opened the door, expecting another hallway but it wasn't. it was his bedroom and the two of you were lying on his bed, cuddling.

walking towards you slowly, he reached out to touch you, to see if it was real. unfortunately, he tripped and fell forward. he closed his eyes and braced himself.

he opened his eyes to his room and he was lying down on his stomach. you were both gone and he was alone. sapnap groaned and was about to go bacl to sleep before he remembered something. he had to call you back.

sapnap hurriedly grabbed his phone and checked his notifications.

2 missed calls from 'baby💕' 3 hours ago

shit.

the phone rang 3 times before you picked up. "hey, i tried calling you earlier, why didn't you answer?"

"yeah- sorry i fell asleep."

"oh." you sighed in relief, greatful that he didn't purposely ignore you. "so, what do you need to talk about?" sapnap

"okay so," he took a deep breath. "i really miss you and you're great and amazing. please don't take this the wrong way but i hope we can still be friends. i really enjoyed all our times together." sapnap said all too quickly for you to understand.

"what? could you repeat that but slower? you went too fast." you giggled. sapnap blushed and coughed. "sorry. uh- so- okay." he took a deep breath, "i know we ended it rough but i was hoping that we could stay as friends? i hope you don't take this the wrong way." he stuttered.

you blinked. once. twice. you thought about it, you wanted to stay friends too but wouldn't it be it awkward? since he was your ex and all.

"sure." you said softly. sapnap pumped his fist in the air and whispered a small 'yes'.

"okay. well, i have go get going. i'll talk to you when i'm free, yeah?"

"sure. why not. alright." sapnap replied, cringing at himself for messing up. you laughed quietly, "bye, sapnap."

as soon as you both ended the call, sapnap called dream. "dream, we're okay now!"

"who's 'we'?"

sapnap had lots of explaing to do, again. but this time, it was good news.

"thank you everyone for coming to my stream, bye everyone!" sapnap said gleefully. just right efter he ended stream, the door bell rung.

he stood up and walked over to his mirror. he sprayed some perfume on himself and smiled.

sapnap opened his door and just as he was expecting, it was you. "you ready to go ice skating?" you questioned.

"ready as i'll ever be."

it was still the same with the two of you, the only thing that changed was the fact that you weren't a couple anymore. maybe it was just fate.

[poppunkporco]

the one where you walked me home (porco x reader fic)

the one where you walked me home (porco x reader)

contents: porco x fem reader, mentions of marcel galliard, childhood friends, best friends to lovers, fluff, pining, alternate universe - college/university, modern au, bisexuality, smoking, porco galliard-centric

rating: teen and up audiences

summary: When he walks her home that night, Porco realizes he might have feelings for his childhood best friend. He has no idea in hell how to deal with it but he tries.

word count: 5079

notes: i just thought it'd be interesting to try writing a modern au porco/reader fic in a more porco-centric POV. what i try to do here is explore how he deals with the soft sappy feelings of slowly realizing he's in love since he's pretty bad at emotions and even more so when it's not a [strong, violent type of feeling]

*fic loosely based on this song:

*this is also cross-posted on ao3

***

2:40 AM at an empty parking lot behind a 7-Eleven. The nearest lamp post flickers weakly with its dimming orange light as Porco sets down his third empty beer can on the concrete with a yawn.

“Hey,” he says, lightly shrugging the shoulder against which she leaned her head on. She doesn’t budge from beside him. He rubs the lethargy off his eyes.

They’ve been sitting on this parking block for almost three hours now-- since they left the gig hours ago at the pub just across the university. They’d just spent the past few hours ranting about midterms and how fucked up alienated labor is along with the absence of ethical consumption under capitalism-- and how everyone is forced to participate in it, talking about trips they’d like to make in and outside the city, their ideal lovers, and anxieties about the future. This was a thing they did now and then, usually on Fridays and Saturdays-- seeking a kind of cathartic escape from their hectic academic life in each other’s company. A friendly rendezvous they’d jokingly call dates every now and then.

He leans forward just enough to get a peek at her face, partly obscured by the mess of hair that had fallen in front of her eyes. 

So she’s asleep.

His eyes dart towards their things lumped together beside her feet-- their backpacks sitting atop an A4-size sketchbook along with the last unopened beer can.

Porco idly clinks his finger against the top of the beer can he had just emptied as he breathes out a wistful sigh.

Somehow, she always reminded him of his long-gone brother. Not to say that she shared even a bit of Marcel's fairly easygoing yet charming demeanor. Because she was far from that. She was loud with a crude mouth-- more like Porco himself, really-- except that she at least was kinder, more pleasantly charismatic towards other people than himself. And in that way, yes, she did remind him of Marcel. But there were other things-- pastimes and memories that reminded him of his brother when she came to mind. They’d known each other even as kids. Back in middle school, Porco remembers how she’d visit their home on the weekends so the three of them could build a Lego city which Marcel himself had drafted on the back of one of his sketchbooks. Those two were always quite the artists even as kids-- Porco recalls fondly. His brother had been the one to introduce her to Porco during one of those weekends. He didn’t like it at first-- how Marcel would seem to pay more attention to her at times as they animatedly sketched parts of the city on paper in the middle of assembling the Lego blocks. He’d eventually learned to be tolerant of her presence at least as the weekends passed by and the city gradually came to life-- vast with skyscrapers, houses, trees, vehicles, and lamp posts. Porco distinctly remembers building a garden with her beside a house that resembled the Galliard residence. He had assembled the green pieces that resembled leaf blades onto the flat Lego board, while she topped them off with tiny colorful flower pieces. It was honestly quite fun and it became a thing he eventually looked forward to on the weekends with Marcel.

But all things come to an end and at times, at points where they feel like they’re not supposed to. Porco knows this well.

In Marcel’s old room, the city remains hidden away, unfinished.

It was on a rainy day when Marcel had met an accident on his way home with a schoolmate. Onlookers had witnessed him racing against the red light to push Reiner away from the path of an incoming vehicle.

Even if it was an accident, Porco despises Reiner after that. He'd decided to never talk to him after the incident but as fate would ridiculously have it, they’d meet again in high school-- as classmates, nonetheless, to his dismay.

It was after this same incident that Porco had grown closer to her-- the only other person who possibly knew Marcel almost nearly as he himself did. She knew about the city and she knew about his sketches, after all. In the first few days after his brother’s wake, they’d simply talk about Marcel as they walked home together after school and how they both missed him. Those walks home would eventually involve detours at the nearest Mcdonald’s where they’d get nuggets and buy a Happy Meal-- the ones that came in flimsy cardboard packaging printed with colorful cartoon mascots-- for the sake of getting the collectibles that came with them. It was a thing they never really grew out of. Even now, as college kids, whenever they’d find themselves eating out together at the nearest Mcdonald’s after their Philosophy classes scheduled on Tuesdays and Thursdays, they’d get themselves a Happy Meal, even if they sometimes earned puzzled looks from the cashier as they engaged in quick, petty quarrels as to which collectible they should get.

Soon, Porco feels her shuffle in her seat beside him, the weight of her head now off his shoulder. She rubs the sleep off her eyes with a yawn.

“...should go home,” she drawls, accidentally kicking one of the empty beer cans sprawled in front of them on the concrete. It lands right at the feet of a passer-by who in turn shoots her a cold glare before kicking the can back in her direction. "I-- hey, uh, sorry about that," she apologizes, louder than necessary. Said passer-by only clicks their tongue in annoyance as they raised a middle finger at her before walking away with a muffled swear under their breath.

She exchanges incredulous, befuddled looks with Porco for a few silent moments before eventually letting out a snort and bursting into a fit of stupidly drunken laughter with him. 

“...is what I mean… fucking capitalism... makesnasshole out ofveryone,” she remarks, broken phrases drawn out in between chuckles. “Yeah, yeah. I got it for the tenth time,” Porco says, laughing with a roll of his eyes. He stands up and stretches out a hand in front of her. “Now can we go home? Can’t exactly start a revolution when the alcohol’s fucked you up that bad,” he says with an impatient sigh.

“Yeah? How do you know? Did Karl Marx write that?” She languidly takes his hand.

“No, but-- fucking… well, I don’t know. Maybe? Indirectly? I mean, we did just give in to consumerism,” Porco says with a sharp click of his tongue as he pulls her up to stand.

“Well… yeah. I guess so.”

“Anyway.” Porco places a palm at the top of her head and urges her to face him. “You seem more out of it than me. I’m walking you home this time, alright?

”She shrugs languidly. “Sure, whatever,” she says, her words muffled as she falls face first into his chest. 

--

“Give me the fucking keys,” he says coarsely after her third failed attempt at unlocking the door to her own flat. In the dim light of the hall, Porco tries to make out the shape of what he recognizes as the right one among the five keys dangling from her keychain. He sighs, frustrated as he finally unlocks the door. 

“How the hell did you--?” Confused, she eyes the keys still dangling from the door. “Why wouldn’t it open when it was me?”

“For the love of--” Porco runs a palm down across his face with an exasperated sigh. “You were forcing the wrong key.”

“Oh.” She snorts trying to stifle a chuckle. Porco pulls the keys from the door and hands them to her along with the sketchbook he’d been carrying.

“Thanks.” She gives the door a light push before finally taking a step into the flat. And then a sudden stop. She pockets her keys and lets the sketchbook fall on the carpeted floor of the foyer. She tilts her head pensively for a few moments, staring blankly at the darkness of her room. Porco raises an eyebrow in confusion. She turns on her heel to face him again.

“What is it?” he asks.

She stands on the tips of her toes, eyeing Porco with what felt to him like newfound curiosity. She rests a hand on his shoulder to steady herself.

Her other hand soon reaches up to cradle the side of his face. It comes as a surprise, but not the kind that made you flinch or visibly react in some way. This was simply… unexpected. Weird. And somehow new.

She’s looking at me. And she’s looking like she’s waiting.

And what is she waiting for, exactly? He feels a nervous lump in his throat, swallows it down. He has half the mind to lean his face closer as he, too, looks at her-- and he looks at her like he’s waiting.

Alas, whatever this is-- it ends where it feels like it’s not supposed to.

“‘Night, Porco,” she says with a feeble smile before falling back flatly on her feet.

“Yeah. You too. I’ll see you around,” he says, tentatively glancing at his side.She crouches down to lazily pick up the sketchbook before finally entering her flat again. Porco catches her giving him a tiny wave through the crack of the door moments before she completely pushes it closed. He bids her goodbye with a curt nod.

Once the door closes, he rolls up the sleeve of his jacket to check the time. 

3:15 AM. Porco raises a palm to his cheek. The ghost of her touch lingers on his skin.

***

“Are you serious?” Porco scoffs. “Y/N, you’re not even watching the film.” He leans his head against his palm with his arm resting on the side of the couch.

“Sure I am,” she says, unpinning her hair before letting her head fall on his lap. As she types out a message on her phone, Porco manages to make out Pieck’s name at the top of the chat box.

“You keep checking your phone.”

“It’s fine. We’ve both seen this film before anyway. I told you-- I’m just rewatching it for my paper on Nietzsche.”

“So you dragged me into this for what?”

She gives a halfhearted shrug. “I don’t know. Felt like it. Just wanted to bother you for a good film.” She finally sets aside her phone to look up at Porco with a shit-eating grin. He sighs and flicks a finger against her forehead. “Ow. What the fuck.”

“At least try to look like you’re actually watching,” Porco says, turning her head to face the TV screen.

"Fine, fine," she says with a grimace as she kneads the pain away on her forehead.

They’re now about an hour into Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. As lovers Joel and Clementine ran through the memories-- hand in hand mapping the history of their relationship-- the ups and downs-- scenes of the two playfully mocking the film at a drive-in theater, a stroll through the flea market leading into talks of having a child, lovemaking underneath the covers as Clementine told Joel about her insecurities rooting from childhood-- all these small intimacies that nonetheless revealed to each other their flawed, detestable selves along with reasons they probably shouldn’t be together, Porco realizes it. 

He looks at her, notes the way the flicker of the TV screen daintily lit up her solemn face and how she’d break into a smile every now and then. She’d brush the back of her hand against his knee and point at the TV screen to tell him that this was among her favorite parts so he absolutely had to pay close attention. A bit funny considering she was the one who wasn’t paying much attention to the film during the first part, Porco thinks. At least she’s watching now, even as he can’t help but watch her instead.

As he absentmindedly brushes a hand against her hair, he wonders if they could be something more, wonders if they’d be anything like Joel and Clementine-- imperfect, but nonetheless worthwhile. They’d known each other since they were kids and he can definitely make a list of things he doesn’t like about her-- like the way she’s too loud and frisky and never seemed to take the right things seriously, how scatterbrained she was that she’d forget the schedule for a midterm exam and how her room always seemed to be in shambles, the way she was so stubborn she’d easily get upset at something as simple as choosing to eat at a fast food different from the one she insisted on, how she’d smoke in his dorm no matter how many times he’d told her that she could get him in trouble for it. But it's not like he's perfect either. She’d told him that he came on too headstrong at times and that’s why a lot of people felt intimidated by him-- a trait that had gotten him into fights and eventually, long afternoons of detention back in high school. She says she hates the way he thought himself too strong to cry in front of anyone and how he’d grown dismissive of opening up to her as they got older. Whenever they’d get into heated fights, she’d tell him that all you ever are is angry and how he was pretty shit at saying sorry like he meant it. And despite all of these, they had remained close friends over the years. They’d promised each other that they’d get better-- slowly, but surely-- even if that was something easier said than done. He could live with that. He would.

***

“Hey, uh--” Porco breathes out a puff of smoke as he hands her the cigarette. He gazes distantly at the parade of city lights before them-- from the headlamps of the vehicles passing below them on the bridge, the streetlights, and the buildings overhead. “--do you still like Pieck?”

She suddenly lets out a cough and a puff of smoke at that. She gapes at Porco incredulously.

“Pock, it’s been three years since we broke up. And that was high school.”

“Look, I know that, but--” he sighs. “I was just wondering.”

She laughs. “That’s not really what you wanted to ask, is it? There’s something else.” She raises an eyebrow at Porco. He rolls his eyes at that, irked at how easily she could read him. “So ask.” She passes him the cigarette and he takes a drag of it.

“Ok--” he says with a sigh. “--Have you liked any other girls after her?”

She raises an eyebrow, intrigued.

“No, not really. Nothing serious, at least. I mean, I did have a crush on this girl who sat beside me in English class during freshman year. But... that was freshman year, you know? Nothing ever really came of it. And you know I would have told you if something actually did, anyway."

“I see.”

“There’s more you want to ask,” she says with a cheeky smile.

“Ok. Fine.” Another drag of the cigarette. “How about-- boys? Have you liked any guy at all since then?” The city lights blur against the filter of smoke. Porco refuses to meet her eyes even as he feels her gaze on him-- heavy with something he could not exactly put his finger on. He knows she’s not smiling anymore and from his periphery, he thinks he senses a swallow in her throat. She turns to the city overhead.

“Yes, actually.” She takes the cigarette from him, smiling fondly upon the light brush of their fingers. “I-- you know, even though I’ve known for a long time that I liked both guys and girls, I still find myself doubting that sometimes. When I’m attracted to a girl, I sometimes think that maybe I was just gay all along. And now that I find myself actually liking a boy again, a part of me entertains the thought that maybe me liking girls was just a phase and maybe I was straight all along. But... I just know it’s not like that. And yet, what people say still gets to me-- they’ve got a way of making you think that being bi isn’t a real thing. Even though it is. I know because... I’m real, right?”

“Yeah. You are. You’re… you’re here.” The corner of his lips turn up as he says it. “I get it. I mean, I think I’m the same.”

“Really?” She turns to gape at him.

“I suppose I’ve never told you this either because it’s so fucking embarrassing, but…” He sighs defeatedly, kneading his temples with unease. “...I made out with Reiner in high school.”

She regards him with a scandalized look.

“Dude, what the fuck. I thought you hated the guy.” 

“I do, alright? It’s just that… teenage hormones and shit. I was stupid and he’s stupid. I-- I don’t know what I was thinking that time. But… I do wonder sometimes--” He scratches his head tentatively. “--what my brother was thinking rushing in to save him from that accident. Like… just what did he see in that meathead that was worth saving?”

“And did you find your answer to that when you were making out?”

Porco eyes her with a deathly glare.

“Fuck you.” 

“Oh, so you did,” she says with an impish grin.

Porco flicks a finger against her forehead.

“Ow-- hey! Stop that,” she says with a grimace. “I mean, I don’t blame you. Reiner’s hot.”

He clicks his tongue at the remark before hastily seizing the cigarette from her grasp to take another drag. "Not like he's the only guy I ever found ho-- I mean liked."

She laughs.

"We should head back," he says coldly.

"Sure.” She nods. “Though… is there anything else you wanted to ask?"

As the filter of smoke hangs between them, Porco wonders about the boy she likes.

He shakes his head. "No. It's nothing."

***

“It was like deja vu,” Porco says, sighing into his phone as he shifts to lie near the edge of his bed. “Except in this dream… before she said goodnight, we, uh--”

“You kissed?” Pieck suggests from the other line.

“Well… yeah.” He puts a palm to cover his face, feeling the flush on his cheeks as he says it.

“So you like her,” Pieck says, almost breaking into a chuckle.

“I, uh…”

“I get it. She’s charming and reminds you of Marcel.”

“That’s…”

“I’ll be honest with you.” She sighs and Porco senses a smile from her tone. “Remember when I said I broke up with her because uni was getting too busy? The truth is that… I feel like you two always seemed to get along better than I ever could with her-- and it probably has to do with Marcel. When I realized that, I’ll admit I did start to feel jealous. I thought back then that you two might eventually get together. After all, you two were both still in high school, while I was already away in uni. It left me distraught for months so I just... decided to break it off. Don’t get me wrong, though. It’s been years and it’s not like I haven’t dated anyone else since then. And in hindsight, that just might have been for the best. I mean, you confiding in me about her right now-- I think-- is a testament to that. Because you realized it too, didn’t you?”

“Oh." He pauses. "I never thought that you-- Pieck, look, I--”

“Pock, if you feel guilty about it just because I used to date her, don’t. It’s not anyone’s fault. That… that she just loved you first. It’s circumstance. She met you and Marcel first before me.”

That she loved you first. As Porco echoes the words in his head, he becomes acutely aware of the beating in his chest and the warmth swarming his face. He buries his face in a pillow and screams into it.

“Hey, Pock? You ok there?” Pieck chuckles.

“How do I-- you think I should tell her?”

“Well, it’s the honest thing to do. And I genuinely think you don’t stand to lose much by doing so. Even if by the littlest chance of her not returning your feelings, I don’t think confessing would ruin your friendship. Might be a little awkward at first, but I don’t think she’ll end up hating or avoiding you at all.”

“You sure you’re not just sayi--”

“No, Pock. I’m not just saying this because we’re friends. I’m saying it because it’s what makes sense.”

“Ok, well… thanks,” he sighs. “And by the way… I’m sorry I called you this early. I know you’re probably busy especially since it’s your thesis year.”

“It’s fine. I’m glad you told me. Frankly, I do find satisfaction in knowing my speculations are correct. And you guys… you two are more predictable than you think-- if I’m being honest,” Pieck laughs.

“Well, I suppose being predictable isn’t so bad… if you’re right.”

Once they bid each other goodbye on the phone, Porco remains sprawled across the bed staring blankly at the ceiling. He rests a palm on his cheek, internally cursing Marcel as he feels the warmth streaming his face once again.

***

“Fuck,” Porco swears under his breath as they both ran towards the car, their feet splashing against the puddled ground as the rain cascades. A looming thunder rolls across the night sky as they make it to the safety of the vehicle.

“So… still not convinced that trying to get a Happy Meal on a rainy Friday at midnight was a bad idea?” Porco says, trying to catch his breath as he sets down the paper bag on the space between their seats.

“Well, I’ll admit it kinda sucked that you had to have your car still parked in school. And in my defense, I didn't expect the drizzle to cascade so soon on the way back. But you know what? It’s fine. We got what we needed and that’s all that matters. I’ll stand by this being a good idea.” She laughs as she peels off her drenched jacket. “Oh, by the way, where can I put this?”

“Just put it in the backseat,” Porco says as he peeled off his own jacket.

“Got it. Here, give me yours too,” she says before turning to place both of their drenched jackets in the backseat.

“Thanks.” Porco switches on the car’s dome light and the windshield wipers. The car’s interior now warmly lit, he rummages inside the paper bag, then hands her a box of chicken nuggets along with a plastic fork. “You want the fries now or later?”

“Later’s good. Thanks.” Porco acknowledges her with a nod, then leans back on the car seat with a languished sigh.

The rain patters incessantly against the windows over the rhythm of the windshield wipers. The faint yellow glow lulls from the ceiling of his car. He recalls a rainy evening spent staring out the window as he nervously waited for Marcel to come home. A distant memory weighs heavy on his eyelids.

“Porco. Are you ok?”

“What? Yeah.” Porco shifts lightly in his seat, slightly startled. “I just… remembered something.”

“What is it?”

“The rain. It just reminded me of Marcel.”

“Oh. Right.”

“Yeah.”

“You know, he was…” She puts down her food and lightly wipes the sides of her mouth with the back of her hand. “Back then, I considered him as something a little more than a best friend. I like that he liked my drawings and how he never made fun of them… even though he was ways better than me at it,” she recalls fondly.

He scoffs. “So… are you guilt-tripping me for something I said about your drawings when we were twelve?”

“You were an asshole, but you should be glad I’m past that.” She rolls her eyes with a sigh. “All I’m saying now is that Marcel was... really special to me.”

“What-- did you have a crush on Marcel or something?”

She snorts. “You could say... it was something like that. Yeah.”

Figures. He nonchalantly crosses his arms in front of his chest. The pattering rain fills in the lull in their conversation.

“I like your drawings too,” he finally says.

“That’s why I drag you along every time I go out to draw. You like watching me, right?” She teasingly raises an eyebrow as she says it.

“Well, sure.” He shrugs awkwardly in his seat.

“Tell me. What else do you like?”

“I don’t know. Let’s see…” he sighs, feigning annoyance with a roll of his eyes. “I like it when I’m in the middle of pulling an all-nighter at Tim Hortons… and you go on and disturb me just to get a Happy Meal on a rainy Friday midnight.”

“Yeah?” she chuckles. “What else?”

Porco turns to glance at her. As she meets him with a playful grin, his mind races with answers.

I like it when you steal my jacket and you leave me to freeze to death in the cold of the cafe’s AC. I like it when you go on a chaotic, semi-coherent drunken rant about how badly you want capitalism dismantled. I like it when you remember Marcel. I like your hair. I like how your hands unpin your hair before you rest your head on my lap.

He scoffs-- more in reaction to his own thoughts than at her teasing. Who knew he could be that embarrassingly sappy? “What are you… getting at?”

“Nevermind.” She shakes her head, still smiling. She laughs while timidly raising a palm to her cheek. “Can we share your fries now?”

***

“So I’m thinking of getting a tattoo,” Porco says, settling himself on the dormitory steps faintly lit by the porch lights hanging on both sides of the entrance.

“Cool. So where do you want it?” She sits beside him while setting down her things-- a shoulder bag and a sketchbook on the concrete step.

“I was just thinking on my arm,” he says, pointing a finger at a spot on his skin.

“What do you want it to look like?”

“Not sure yet.”

“I could draw you one.”

“Yeah?”

“Sure. I could do it right now.”

“Really?”

She takes the ballpoint pen out of the spring of her sketchbook and begins to doodle something on his arm. Covering her drawing with a cupped palm, she chuckles while mischievously peering up at him.

“I swear to god, if you’re drawing something embarrassing-- Oh, fuck you.” Porco laughs, managing to take a peek at the ink drawing of a cartoon porcupine with the hair on its head stylishly pushed back. Below the drawing, it writes 'porcopine.' He pulls his arm away from her grasp.

"What? You don't like it?" She grimaces.

"Porcopine? Really?"

“What? It's cute,” she says with an offended click of her tongue, reaching for his arm once again.

Below the word 'porcopine,' she then writes the phrase 'i <3 you.'

Porco furrows his brows upon reading the phrase, then lets out a chuckle. “What does this--?” he asks, pointing out the inked words on his skin.

“What do you mean? It is what it is.”

“You mean it?”

“Of course I do.”

“How do you mean it?”

She tilts her head pensively and squints at Porco as she gathers how to describe exactly what she meant. She supposes that he’s right-- a clarification was indeed necessary. This kind of thing could get confusing, after all. When you’ve known each other for so long in a relationship such as this, lines tend to blur. One day, you could both feel like the bestest of friends, and then like lovers the next.

“I mean it in a way that I wouldn’t mind marrying you.”

“Oh.” Porco gapes at her for a moment. “Ok,” he says, letting out an awkward chuckle.

“What’s with that reaction? I’m serious, Pock.”

“I just… I mean, to be honest…” He furrows his brows, carefully pondering his words. “I wouldn’t mind marrying you either.” Porco scratches his head sheepishly.

“Ok then,” she chuckles, shifting in her seat to face him. “We could build something. Something bigger than a Lego house. Maybe one with a garden. A story with a perfect ending.”

“Yeah? And if it’s not perfect, what then?”

“Something worthwhile, then. An ending that feels like an ending.”

“Ok. I can live with that,” he laughs.

“Porco.”

As she cradles his face in between her palms, Porco becomes acutely aware of the flush in his cheeks.

Then, slowly, she leans closer to gingerly place a kiss at the tip of his nose.

They soon find themselves both chuckling at what was probably the most blatantly romantic gesture between them thus far.

“So, uh, what are we now, exactly?” he asks awkwardly as they soon pull away.

She shrugs. “Lovers? Best friends who would marry each other? Though the latter is kind of a mouthful if you ask me.”

“Yeah. Let’s go with that first one.”

“Say, Porco.” She tilts her head questioningly at him. “You want to tell me how this night ends?”

“How the hell should I--”

She puts a finger to his lips and shakes her head. “Hey. Lovers now, remember? I’m not the only one telling this story. So tell me.”

“Ok. Let’s see,” he sighs. And so he indulges her. “It ends with you beside me. We’re lying down on my bed.”

“Clothed or naked?”

He gapes. “Are you seriously even consi--”

She flicks a finger against his forehead as she regards him with a mischievous smile. “Just answer the question.”

“Ok, fine,” he resigns, lightly kneading his forehead. “Look, I want to say naked because my AC’s broken ri--”

“Naked it is, then.”

“Clothed.” He glares. “For tonight.”

“Fine, fine,” she says, scratching her head in resignation. “You sure you’re not having second thoughts about letting me stay tonight, though? Not worried you might wake up with a bunch of porcopines on your face? Or I don’t know-- dick drawings?”

“Fuck off,” he says with a chuckle.

“So… what is it, really? You want me to stay or you want me to go?”

Porco sighs before slowly leaning his face closer to hers.

“I want you to stay,” he says against her cheek, before placing a chaste kiss on her skin. “Whatever I wake up to in the morning, I’m sure it’s worth it.”

[pure-kirarin]

Studying at night - Koby x f!reader (College AU)

A/N : Thanks a lot dear. I am a sucker for my pink boy, so, here is a scenario about studying with him. It came out like the first part of a series, so I might write the rest later. It was so fun and well...Please imagine it being set in La Sorbonne or something. I imagined the actions taking place there. +w+ Ok. Enough chatter. 

« - Who have you been assigned to work with, (Y/N) ? »

«-Hmm...Let's see » you check the little paper that you have picked « the name is Koby...I don't know who it is. »

« -Koby ?! Forreal ?? Whaa, I envy you » She taps your shoulder gently while assembling her books. « He scored first for the last two years on every single test. He is like...very hardworking. And a bit nerdy if you see what I mean » She says as she mimics big glasses on her face. « He will probably do all the project, don't bother ! »

-What do you mean ? You're offending me, Nami-chan ! I won't let him do all the work...And you,w ho have you been assigned to ?

She pauses for a little while pinching the bridge of her nose, visibly annoyed then says ; « Zoro. If I let him do anything I think that I will fail this class. Guess I'll do all the work she shrugs but I will make him pay for lunch for a week in return. 

-Sounds like a nice deal. You smile and put your books in your handbag.

-Well...I have to leave for now. I have a lecture starting in five minutes...Oh...Look there ! -She points out to a pink haired guy on one of the middle rows putting his books in his bag- that's your man, you might want to catch up with him to discuss the project. Anyways, I'm leaving now.

-See you later. I'll come back later tonight so don't wait for me for dinner.

-Alright ! See ya !

Nami and you shared the same room at the dorm, however, because of your work you always came back late. You didn't have a choice, the cost of life was really high in the capital and you didn't want to be a burden to your parents. You sighed and walked towards the guy. You had some lectures in commun, his face was familiar. You have always assumed that he were younger because of his childish features. The pink hair gave him a soft look, it reminded you of cotton candy.

You waved to him and said after clearing you throat ;

-Yo' ! I'm (Y/N). I guess that we are doing the project work together ? You point to the piece of paper on the wooden table.

-O-oh, hi. He looks at the paper and reads, (Y/N/L/N). Yes ! We are doing the project together then. Nice to meet you. I am Koby. He bows a little bit while presenting himself.

-Cool. I don't have a class right now. We could go grab a coffee in the cafeteria and discuss the project if that's okay with you.

-Ah ? Of course ! That's fine with me. I guess I have some time. He says while looking at his wrist watch.

-Nice. Let's go.

You give him a wide smile. He looked a little bit uncomfortable. The shy type for sure. You were somehow comfortable and looked at him from head to toe. Cute style ; he was wearing a green bandana on his forehead, casual pale blue blaser above a white shirt and a pair of jeans. He looked well put together, a little bit boring ; nerdy type for sure. He took a pair of huge glasses off his face and put them in a case before following you to the cafeteria.

You were now sitting in front of each other in the cafeteria. You smiled noticing how he just ordered a hot chocolate while you loved your tea black and bitter. He was looking at you, then, when you rested your eyes on him he just looked away. He seemed like an easily flustered person. You wondered if he will manage in the presentation. The project you were working on was due to be presented in front of everyone. It was about didactics.

-So, you're also a second year ?

-Y-yes.

-We don't have a lot of lectures in commun. In what major are you ?

-History. I take this lecture as an extra. Didactics sounded fun.

-Oh. You take a sip from your coffee. That's nice. You wanna become a teacher ?

-Not really. I would like to become a heritage curator.

-Whaa, really ? Sounds cool. And...very specific.

-I guess so...That is not something a lot of people would like to do. He says, smiling and scratching his neck. He seemed nervous.

-You're so tense. You should relax a bit. We are the same age after all. Anyways, about this project. You take your agenda out of your bag and open in it front of Koby. Oh jeez. I am really busy with m part-time job most days. So I am only free on nights...The library stays open all night, I don't know if it's okay with you to work at night. I don't want to impose my schedule on you.

He waves a hand infront of his face, assuring you that it's fine with him ;

-It's okay ! I live in the dorm anyways so I am free whenever you are. I don't want to interfere with your working hours.

-Alright so let's say thursday at 10 PM ?

-That's alright.

-It's settled then. I am looking forward to working with you, Koby ! You make a bright smile and he  gasps a bit, taken aback by your chill demeanour. Oh I forgot. Can I have your number ?

He looked startled for a while.

-For the project. You assured.

-Oh yes sure !

You offer him your phone and he types his number. You wave to him ;

-Thanks ! I'll message you later. It was nice meeting you, Koby. »

You don't wait for his answear and head to the dorm to get prepared for your job.

(Y/N) sent a message : Hey Koby, you always down to study at 10 PM tonight ???

Koby👓 sent a message : Yes sure ! I'll book a study room in the library if that's fine with you.

(Y/N) sent a message : Sure, see you later !;)

At nine a half you were getting your books and study material ready to go join the cotton candy man. You didn't bother to take off your make up and put on a big coat over your body. You just took off your red lipstick with a babywipe and headed to the library. The place was calm and almost empty. It was rustic, it had a XIXth century style, well, like your whole university that was renovated around that time. It had a classical style that was charming and added a cozy ambience.

Koby 👓 sent a message : I am already in study room number 3. I am sorry I didn't notify you earlier.

This guy was too polite, you thought. You had a little smile then went to the study room. He jumped a bit in his seat when the door opened and that made you chuckle. He was easily startled.

-Hi Koby, I hope that I'm not messing with your sleeping schedule.

Despite the late hour, he seemed wide awake. He said as you sit next to him, putting your laptop on the table.

-O-Oh...No. It's totally fine. I hope that I am the one not interfering with your job.

When his eyes layed on you, he couldn't restrain the surprise that was now mirrored in them. Surely because you were wearing heavy make up ; smokey eyes and glitter that was stuck to your face and your hair. It was different from your usual naked-face look. He couldn't help but wonder for what reason where you wearing so much make up, and what you were hiding under your long coat. But he coughed loudly, trying to focus again ; the project.

-Thanks. I really appreciate how flexible you are around my hours. I owe you one ! I think that no one else would've accepted to work with me this late haha...Well, I wouldn't have minded doing the project on my own. You shrug.

-Really ?...Well...Actually, me neither. I am not too good at project working...And studying with others... He looks down with a smile.

-Oh wow, I wouldn't have guessed. You look like you are good at cooperating. Anyways, I am sure that we will kick ass !

The way you talked and how confident you were were two things that the pinkette appreciated about your personnality. You seemed like an easy going person, he didn't feel much pressure to work with you. You open your laptop and start laying some ideas, meanwhile, he takes out a notebook and a pencil case ; Oh, old-school, I see, you think to yourself.

His notes were very organized and clean. He seemed to have memorized everything the professor has said about the project and had a clear plan. However, he asked you for your opinion for everything and couldn't help but ask « are you alright with this part ? » for every idea he suggested. It was a bit annoying, but also a bit cute.

When he was studying, he was different. He had a bit more confidence and didn't hesitate to correct you when something you said seemed out of the topic or a bit repetitive. You appreciate this about him ; yes, no wonder he scored first for the two last years.

You worked for around two hours before you noticed that his eyes started looking tired. He wasn't used to studying this late, yet he did his best to come study with you at this time. You felt bad for keeping him awake.

-Koby-san ? Your soft voice snatched him out of his half-sleeping state.

-Ohh ! Sorry I just--

-You should probably go to sleep. I am sorry I gave you such a hard time. You must have classes tomorrow morning...You said with a sorry voice.

-No no, it's totally fine. I am sorry I just...well...

-No need to be sorry. Well, it's past midnight now. We should probably get going and continue tomorrow or some other day.

-Are you sure ?

-Yeah. I'm not going to keep you more. You look really tired. You shouldn't overwork yourself, Koby-san...Well...Even if technically it's my fault. You giggled a bit.

You started putting your stuff in your bag and he did the same, appreciating your presence. You had a soft aura that was really calming. He has never studied this late before, but he liked the atmosphere. It felt so dreamy.

As you were both going out of the room, you noticed a little cat keychain on the ground. You bowed down to take it in your hand. It was a cute kitty wearing a strawhat. You looked at Koby with a frown and said  

-I think that you dropped this ?

You couldn't help but smile when you saw his embarrassed face. Yeah. It definitely looked like something he would have. He took it off your hand pretty fast and stuttered ;

-Oh thanks ! It's...Well...It's like a lucky charm haha.

-No need to justify yourself. I think that it fits your personnality pretty well.

-Huh ? He just said not understanding what you meant.

-It's pretty cute !

You were making it even harder for him not to blush and you were having too much fun looking at him struggle. It was wrong, but it just was too much fun.

-Oh. It was a compliment by the way.

You wink at him before going out of the study room. He follows you, destabilized. Your confident and assertive behavior was really foreign to him. You really made him interested in learning more about you.

Studying with you was calming, sharing that moment at night in the almost empty library, having you in full make up at such a late hour, as if you were going to a date. He blushed at that thought and felt bad for thinking that. You were there to study and you were strangers, well, university mates. He wasn't allowed to have such a thought.

You were fascinating in more than one way and you really made him curious to learn more about you. You seemed like the type of girls to hide secrets behind her immaculate day-look. He was a bit impatient to learn more. But why ? You were only working for a university project after all, and once it was done, he won't have the opportunity to spend more time with you, and that somehow made his chest tighten.

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] Mother!MC with Demon Brothers + Luke Headcanons

Scenario: Instead of a younger human, the Devildom welcomes a mother (with a 3-year old son in tow) into the exchange program. 

intro + headcanons about how the brothers would interact with her 

no romance… just uwu

bonus how the brothers would treat the son (why son? Perhaps because I too want a son)

Female reader!! (MC is referred to as she in this post) 

bonus character: Luke :3c

I JUST WANT THEM TO FEEL LOVED OK

Lucifer wasn’t prone to believe in fate-- and the beginnings of the exchange program was just another reason why he did not. He let the breeze-- the wind pick a human applicant for him; and if he had gone through every application (though he wasn't completely sure he'd be sane by the end of it all) maybe this situation wouldn't have happened. 

"What do you mean you can't be one of our exchange students?" Diavolo inquired, more curious than anything, an amused smile gracing his lips.

"I have a son," she said hesitantly. And there he was, peering around at the assembly room in his mother's arms that were wrapped protectively around him.

A mother and her human child, Lucifer thought blearily. One could only imagine what would happen if both of them remained here. (Which is why he never cut corners in anything he ever did ever because the one time he does, things go to shit. Damn Diavolo for enabling him.)

--

Lucifer

disgruntled by the adjustments made to accommodate a human child and his mother; mf will he ever rest

probably has to worry about babysitting duties delegated to his brothers 

however, pleasantly surprised by MC's calm demeanor and reliable personality; finally another competent person in the house he doesn't have to really pick up after

...actually adores her and her son

accidentally does things to please her without really realizing it and hates the slight disappointment or worry he sees when he goes through sleepless nights or lashes out from anger

doesn't remember the last time he's been chastised, but he's as embarrassed as he can be when she fusses over him

the hell coffee she makes for him every morning and the snacks she brings during his breaks makes him lowkey wanna cry-- he doesn’t know how to deal with a selfless, unconditional love

is used to being a single parent ngl so taking care of her son is kinda… easy especially if the son is compliant

finds himself pressing a kiss to his forehead absently and catches himself only after he's done it (bonus points if Barbatos takes a pic of it and sends it into their trio gc) 

“Barbatos, please delete this picture.”

“Oh, are you sure about that?”

“................”

ah he's attached, and so are his brothers, which kind of perturbed him a little but he’s kind of in the same boat after a short week or so

(if there was one brother who had a chance of harboring feelings for a mother mc, it’d be Luciiiiiiii uwuwuwuuwuuw; what can I say? He can’t resist the milf) 

eventually, he opens up to her about the war-- because if there was any human he’d trust with his secrets, it would be MC

Mammon

he's crying 

he doesn't think anyone has ever talked or held him as gently as MC

similar to the game, absolutely adores her and can't even lie about it

ok jk he's still a tsundere, but blushes every time MC looks at him with a knowing look because he can't lie convincingly enough that no, the head pats dont feel nice and no, he's just eating the lunch she made because it'll be a waste otherwise, ok?!

Her son definitely thinks he’s related to Mammon

Definitely the first one to accidentally call her “mom” 

But hey don’t blame him-- he’s weak to how MC looks at him endearingly as she brushes hair out of his face motherly, like he can do no wrong 

Nothing can compare to how Mammon feels when MC tells him she’s proud of him

feels legit guilty when she calls him out on his habits of stealing things to the point he remembers her voice when he tries to do it again-- basically his conscience ngl

she's like a cold hand to his feverish forehead, a cooling balm to the burn on his hand

when she defends him from his brother's insults, swears he'll protect her and her son 

on that note, adores her son too and her son adores mammon!

surprisingly (or not) good with kids and treats them well; plays with them, very lively and dynamic

takes babysitting pretty seriously-- makes him consider the fact that he might actually want to be a father in the future if possible

not that he doesn’t have reckless endeavors with her son... they just end up okay so no one is none the wiser until it shows up on someone’s devilgram or spoken about through Barbatos/Diavolo

Leviathan

Honestly doesn’t know how to to react 

A little miffed tbh that he finds it so easy to talk to her about…. Everything??? 

When he enlisted her (and her son) to get his money back from Mammon, did he expect to rant to her about all his animes and gush about his figurines to her because that was one of the first time someone’s allowed him to indulge in his hobbies and listen patiently?

No, and now he’s crying 

And the fact she gently addresses his self-deprecating comments and urges him to see how she sees him (smart, witty, forgiving)---

Will probably do anything for MC and anything she says at this point; the pact is just a formality LOL

Listens to her and genuinely thinks the things she does for him is in his best interest 

Had a hard time knowing how to deal with her son for a while, simply because he doesn’t know what he could do to actually entertain the child

Then finds out he could literally put up TSL or any of his favorite animes and the kid will watch it-- and ABSORB

Levi might as well be the kid’s best friend at this point-- dubbs him ‘Henry’-- which is really the greatest compliment MC thinks her son can get from him

Honestly volunteers to babysit him and proceeds to spoil him rotten

Satan

Slightly annoyed at how motherly she is at the beginning-- he takes her care and actions as if she treats him like a child

Finds it frightening how soothed he feels when he’s around her

There’s something about an older, calming presence that saps the anger from him and makes him feel like he can be himself around MC

Surprisingly the second person to accidentally call MC by “mom” probably an hour after he makes fun of Mammon for doing it (lol karma)

isn't one to seek out her attention like with levi, mammon, or asmo but is pleased whenever he does have time to spend with her because she always seems to have insight on everything and a strange wisdom that all mothers apparently do

has a lot of late night talks with her about her life, her career, what it's like having a child

often finds himself asking her for advice, and even if she doesn't have the answer, he always comes out of it thoughtful and clear minded 

always willing to take care of her son; delights in reading him his favorite books and enacting the exciting scenes 

always treats him like an adult to the point that their conversations are really funny to listen to

"So would you say the author's intent of the blue door was to convey the agony of grief?"

"I like the color blue."

"As did the protagonist; hm, you bring up a good point."

the son is Satan's partner in crime against Lucifer 

"It's better if we do this, isn't that right?"

"Yeah!" MC’s child says, happily chewing on his favorite snack that Satan always gives to him and honestly not caring about the conversation at hand at all

"See? He agrees with me!”

And Lucifer just sighs bc he always loses in these arguments and Satan is unbearably smug

Asmodeus

similar to Satan, finds her presence in Devildom to be very pleasant and calming

she never seems to be disapproving of his past times, and Asmo is endeared by the way she never fails to say "stay safe" or "have fun!" or even "do you want me to leave the front lights for when you come back?"

the little motherly ways in which she shows she cares makes Asmo adore her

loves taking her shopping; always has a good time just gossiping, trying new clothes, or having a girls night out with self careeeee

when her son tags along, loves to have him dress up too or try on make up and it's too adorable NOT to post on devilgram

pretty sure MC's son has trended on devilgram before-- but that was the first and last time because Lucifer yelled at him for advertising the fact there was a human child in Devildom

which Asmo thinks is silly because he's pretty sure the caption under the selfie of the three of them ("So adorbs! I've only had MC's son for a day, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in Devildom and then myself. Teehee!") would have deterred any demon from laying a finger on him

When Asmo has him for babysitting duties, always loves to bathe him and play with bubbles, morphing his hair into an afro or an equally fashionable hairdo

actually very attentive to the child!!

Beelzebub

Not much changes from how Beel treats MC, but does view her actions in a more motherly manner 

I think one thing that would change is that-- considering MC is a mother of her own child, is actually very protective of the brothers and sensitive to their changes in moods

When Lucifer gets angry at Beel and Luke, MC is furious and furiously protective, not yielding one bit or hesitating to put herself in front of them because of her instincts-- Beel has never admired her more 

Physical strength has always something he can easily understand, but it is the strength of wills and of bravery that surprises him every time 

After Mammon and Satan accidentally calls you “mom” Beelzebub has no qualms with calling you by mom either-- I mean, what’s the shame in that? Everyone already thinks of you as their mother-figure anyways

MC helps him deal with the loss of his sister

With MC’s child… You know that one meme with the two ways dad deals with kids: one is softly kissing his child on the forehead as he sleeps and the other is carrying his kid by the leg with one arm

Both of them is Beel 

carries the kid around in the weirdest ways sometimes, including on his head, in one hand like he's holding a trophy, upside down (dw the kid thinks it's funny)

main transport is on his shoulders though; thinks it's kinda cute how the kid puts his arms around his head

wouldn't love anything more but to nap with him, but Beel is afraid of hurting him when he sleeps

Is the softest with MC’s son--- he’s not used to being the older brother, so he takes this responsibility kind of seriously 

Always makes sure the food that MC’s son eats is appropriate so he tastes/tries it first… and sometimes ends up eating all of it, but he always manages to succeed in feeding the kid so it’s all good

Belphegor

Wants to hate MC so badly the first time they meet when he’s in the attic

He’s supposed to HATE humans, damn it-- why the hell is MC trying to be so motherly and understanding, huh?? How dare she make him guilty after he lied to her like wlkjaflksjfkjasdlfj

Out of all of them, seeks MC the least; whether it’s from guilt or the fact that her presence reminds him of the things and resentment he used to hold against her 

Takes a little more cajoling from MC to talk to her and explain how he’s feeling so they can move past it

He’d rather die than let anyone else know that he teared up when they talked about Lilith and how he felt about everything; urges Belphie to talk to Lucifer and seek reconciliation with him individually (because it may be a family problem, but the feud was between the two of them, don’t you think?)

Finally gets the redemption arc he deserves and feels a lot lighter knowing that everything that has happened is now in the open and he’s ready to start healing 

In avoiding MC after the whole debacle, Belphie ends up spending more time with her son because he thinks Belphie is fascinating and Belphie has no clue why 

Similarly to Satan, treats the kid like he would anyone else but does find it amusing if the kid chases after his tail like a cat

Always ends up napping with him whenever MC’s son takes a nap-- after all, what’s easier than looking after a kid if you’re BOTH asleep?

Keeps an eye on him by putting a hand on his torso as they nap together

Uses MC’s son as an excuse to not do something, especially when Lucifer tells him to do something he doesn’t like to do

Honestly the son is a part of his arsenal-- he knows how weak everyone is for this kid (and so is he tbh but more lowkey) so cute pics of him is like… currency (Mammon WISHES he thought of this first) 

Bonus:

Luke

MC practically adopts him the moment she lays eyes on him-- how could she not? Luke may as well be her other son

Luke can’t say no, especially after she saves him from Lucifer

Definitely calls her mom by accident and the brothers tease him-- only for him to retort back that “don’t you ALL call her by mom?” and they shut up lol

Simeon still gets to tease Luke though heheh 

Really really really tries hard not to refer to MC as mom, but it slips out sometimes and no one even bats an eye 

Baking together is such a family bonding moment

Treats MC’s son most like his younger brother almost automatically and makes sure he doesn’t get into any trouble while he’s taking care of him (though he does anyways) 

Kind of likes the responsibility of babysitting MC’s son; makes him feel trusted

(MC takes the cutest pics of them together when they fall asleep; starts thinking about maybe having another child wouldn’t be so bad)