#but yeah I felt like this one conveyed some good angst

[hyunebunx]

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 ⏖ ’ when you aren't dating but aren't just friends either (maknae line)

⁺ 𖹭 . genre: fluff, a lot more angst and suggestive themes!!

⁺ 𖹭 . warnings: toxic relationship dynamics (not all of them)

⁺ 𖹭 . a/n: hyung line here!! hope you enjoyy <33 pls let me know your thoughts in the comments/reblogs! <3

𝜗୧ jisung 𝜗୧

Another jealous one. Honestly, in his case, you’re both jealous and it’s justified.

You guys go back and forth a lot. One minute you want him, the next you don’t and that really messes with Jisung’s head on a daily basis.

The line between friendship and something more is blurred here since you’ve done numerous things that have crossed it multiple times but unfortunately, neither of you knows how to handle that.

You: did you get home safe?

As expected, his reply came only a minute later since he was always glued to his phone.

Ji <3: yeah bin dropped me off

You: that’s good

You: did you have fun at the party? with that girl that was all over you?

You couldn’t help but bite down on your bottom lip as you hit send, suddenly overtaken by this indescribable feeling of anxiety. You could picture the reaction that simple question would get out of Jisung, the furrow of his eyebrows and the displeasure on his face clear as day in your mind.

Ji <3: y/n what the fuck

The three dots that indicated he was typing kept appearing and disappearing, almost like he couldn’t decide on a response, as taken aback as you thought he’d be. That went on for a few moments more before stopping altogether and next thing you knew, your phone lit up with an upcoming call. Taking a deep breath, you mentally prepared yourself for another argument before sliding your finger on the screen to answer.

“What nonsense is your pretty little mouth sprouting right now, Y/n?” Came his slightly groggy voice, visibly exhausted after the long night he had had partying. No ‘hello’, no ‘baby’, even if he seemed calmer than you expected, Jisung was obviously aggravated by your behavior.

Moving the phone from one ear to the other, you tried to ease some of your anxiety by sitting down on the bed. “Nonsense? Jisung, you do know I received pictures of you and this random girl from three of my friends, right?”

Jisung let out a strained laugh, one that conveyed all of his anger. “What is this now? Did you stoop so low as to put your friends to spy on me when you’re not here?”

“Are you hearing yourself?” your voice got louder as all of your muscles grew tense. “I just asked you a fucking question, nobody was spying on you!”

You heard him exhale loudly on the other end, presumably rolling his eyes. “So, I’m not allowed to speak to people of the opposite gender now?”

A sigh escaped you at that, rolling your shoulders before letting yourself fall back against the many pillows, frowning.

“You know that’s not what I asked, Ji – “

“Oh, I know.” He cut you off, the argument giving him more energy. “You were just wondering if we fucked.”

With wide eyes, you sat up trying to defend yourself but his velvety voice interrupted once again.

“Don’t worry, you’re the only one I fuck at parties. The only one I fuck, in general.” Even if these words were meant to reassure you, the tone of his voice did anything but that. “Any more questions or jealousy fueled craziness?”

You scoffed, your nerves slowly morphing into anger that threatened to bubble to the surface any second. The audacity to call you crazy and be bothered by your behavior when he usually lost his goddamn mind if a guy as much as breathed in your direction, was wild. This thing you and Jisung had wasn’t healthy, you could see it, and everyone in a 100-mile radius could see it. But the feelings that blossomed along the way felt too real, and intense for either of you to just call it quits, no matter how toxic your current dynamic was. Most of the time, you brought out the worst in each other, but you also felt like your best couldn’t even exist without him.

With another sigh, the man tried to redeem himself once he realized he might’ve taken it a bit too far, voice barely above a whisper as he softened up.

“I’ve been chasing after you to make you my girlfriend for months now, baby. Do you really believe I’d do something like that to us?”

𝜗୧ felix 𝜗୧

No matter your relationship status, Felix treats you like you’re the most precious person in the world. No surprises here.

He’s so gentle and loving, the sight of you never fails to put a smile on his face. Wants to be near you all the time, always invading your personal space and clinging to you any chance he gets.

Hugs, lingering touches and not so innocent kisses. There’s a very strong longing for the other here.

Laughter could be heard as you and Felix were playfighting on the couch, skilled fingers tickling every spot you knew would make the other lose their mind. One of the perks of being such good friends was having easy access to each other’s weaknesses, making the tickle war fair on both fronts. Though you prided yourself on having many aces under your sleeve, Felix countered them easily each and every time.

“Just – “ Your sentence was cut off by another fit of laughter as Felix continued his attack, not even giving you the chance to speak. “Admit you cheated! You’re a cheater Lee Felix! I would have won that race fair and square if you wouldn’t have bombed me right at the finish line.”

Felix only laughed in response, not admitting anything as he continued to tickle your sides. His innocent mask always fooled you into forgetting that to his core, he was a notorious cheater who loved tricking others.

“Or maybe you’re just a sore loser.” He grinned, gently nudging your side to have you fall on the couch. Briefly stopping his tickle assault, he then moved to hover over you, smile turning into a smug, a little too arrogant, smirk.

The air shifted as he got even closer, one hand moving upwards your body until it reached your face. Your eyes met and his smirk dropped, not once looking away while he stopped at your jaw, his thumb sticking out to softly run over your lower lip. The gesture was so intimate and familiar as he never missed an opportunity to be affectionate, yet it still caused your heart to flutter and breath hitch in your throat momentarily. He always looked at you with eyes full of love and adoration and each time, you were willing to give him everything he desired and more.

Felix hummed, his already deep voice dropping even lower while he continued to maintain eye contact. “Who knew you took mario kart so seriously?”

You couldn’t take it anymore. His touch burned in the most pleasant way, leaving behind blooming flowers as strange as that sounded. That’s how being with Felix felt too. You felt love, passion, lust, comfort, all wrapped up in the pretty package that was him. Being with Felix felt like home.

That’s why, you took advantage of him getting lost in what he was doing to you before suddenly setting your hands on his shoulders in hopes of overpowering him, pushing his body back so you could be the one on top. With each knee on either side, you straddled him before leaning down and connecting your lips in a passionate kiss. If Felix was surprised by the turn of events, he didn’t show it, hands finding your hips and resting there while gently caressing the skin.

It felt like fireworks going off on New Year’s when you kissed him, lips fitting together like they were made for each other. The plushness of his lips along with the taste of his tongue, of him – they all drove you insane.

Lee Felix might have been a filthy cheater when it came to any type of game, willing to deceive everyone just to win. But when it came to your relationship – whatever that was – you knew he would never be anything other than truthful.

𝜗୧ seungmin 𝜗୧

He’s the sweetest when with you. No joke, the others usually complain about how you get special treatment from him because Seugmin is never that nice to them.

Has moments when he gets so gentle and lovey-dovey but as soon as someone points it out, he playfully pushes you away with a bashful smile, cheeks reddening by the second.

Can be a bit inconsiderate of your feelings sometimes.

The room was silent save for the tv that was quietly running in the background, the action movie long forgotten by Seungmin as you captivated all of his attention. His eyes were glued to your sleeping form in his lap, the pillow under your head along with the blanket on top ensuring you were most comfortable. One of his hands would sometimes reach out to fix the blanket while the other would soothe you back to sleep by caressing your head, leaning down to whisper sweet nothings in your ear if some of the guys got too loud. It was very peaceful for him, a serenity he didn’t usually get in his everyday life that only came along with you.

You were special to him, his feelings for you obvious to everyone around except for the person that mattered most. Because of that, he was usually reluctant to act on them but that was starting to get harder and harder each day, especially when you did things like right now. You were the picture of peace, away in dreamland while Seungmin was the complete opposite, a storm picking up inside of his mind.

He was confused. His gaze was filled with nothing but fondness as he once again looked down at you, happiness bubbling up inside of him and threatening to overflow to the surface any second. Yet as he kept staring, he could feel little knives puncturing his poor heart at the reminder that you were nothing more than friends, what you had purely platonic.

“Guys, look at Seungmin being a lovesick puppy.”

Jeongin’s voice came from his right and he immediately turned to the youngest with a glare, one that didn’t seem to do anything as his smile only grew in response. Shaking his head, Seungmin rolled his eyes before his gaze fell back to you, his hand now stroking your soft hair.

“Shh, Innie, don’t disturb our couple.” Hyunjin chimed in with a smirk of his own, quick reflexes helping him dodge the pillow Seungmin threw right at his face. Chan only chuckled under his breath from his place on the other sofa while Minho didn’t even glance up from his phone, absorbed in what was presumably an argument with his partner.

“Will you guys be quiet? Y/n’s sleeping.” His voice remained low yet the hostility in it was clear as day as he turned to look at his two troublemaker friends, glaring. He wasn’t in the mood for any teasing it seemed. “And stop calling us a couple. We aren’t together and we’ll never be so knock it off and let me enjoy the movie.”

The men stopped after that, not wanting to push their luck as they knew how scary Seungmin got when angry. But unknowing to them, you heard the whole thing, your heart falling all the way down to your stomach at his painful, careless words.

What was supposed to be a relaxing afternoon, ended up with you getting your heart broken by none other than Kim Seungmin himself, the guy you’ve been in love with since what felt like two lifetimes ago.

𝜗୧ jeongin 𝜗୧

Did someone say childhood friends to lovers? Because I did.

You’re very comfortable around each other, knowing all of the other’s secrets and defining life events so when your relationship started to shift, you were none the wiser.

Has always loved you in some way, just isn’t aware of the fact that he’s actually in love with you.

“And you won’t believe what she said next!”

He chuckled, fox eyes following your every move as you continued to pace around in his room. “What did she say?”

Turning to him, you made a face before starting to mock one of your girlfriends. “Well Y/n, maybe if you got a boyfriend, you would understand why we can’t always bend over backwards for you!”

Jeongin gasped, hands moving up to his mouth pretending to be flabbergasted by what you just said, completely entertained by your antics. Being best friends for as long as you two have been, there was nothing unusual with you coming over to catch him up on the latest drama that was happening in your friend group. It was more or less a weekly tradition at this point.

“Can you believe that? She was blaming me for the fact that she was a shitty friend!”

He nodded, agreeing with your every word. “And not only that, but she was also boyfriend shaming you!”

“Exactly!” you exclaimed, throwing your hands up in frustration. “Do you see the type of people I have to deal with now that you’re not here?”

Those last words made Jeongin’s shoulders fall as it all dawned on him; you were right – he was barely here nowadays, his busy schedule keeping him away from you and all he’s known for the majority of his life. He missed it, going out and goofing around with you and his school friends, having no real responsibilities other than doing some random homework and picking the place you’d hang out at after classes.

He missed you. So much that it physically hurts sometimes.

“Jeongin?”

At the sound of your sweet voice calling his name, he snapped out of it, eyes focusing on your form in front of him once again. Without a word, he then beckoned you closer with a finger and once you were in reach, he pulled you into his arms, a laugh escaping him as you gasped in surprise. Jeongin didn’t usually initiate physical contact so being pulled into an embrace like that, so out of the blue was really confusing for you. Nevertheless, your arms went around his neck while you melted into his hold, his own going around your waist innocently as you were now standing in between his legs.

“How about we make this girl eat her words, hm?” he smiled, looking up at you from his seat on the bed, chin resting just above your stomach.

Raising an eyebrow, your hands moved to comb through his dark locks. “How?”

It seemed that’s what he was waiting for as his smile turned into a smirk, eyes full of mischief at the plan he was silently cooking up.

“Let me be your boyfriend, your trophy man if you will.” Seeing the way your eyes widened and mouth dropped open, he squeezed your sides, shushing you. “I’m not done. I can pretend to be your boyfriend when she’s around, showering you with affection until she turns green with envy and realizes what a shitty friend she’s been. Or, until you drop her.”

Your mouth closed and he could see you contemplate his words, your lips pursed into a small pout. You looked kind of adorable from up close, not that he’d ever admit it.

With a nod, you agreed, your smile returning and lighting up your face for the first time in the hour you’ve been at his house.

“Alright, let’s do this!”

And then, next thing you knew, Jeongin stood up and suddenly, his lips were on yours.

tagging: @captainchrisstan

[wordsarelife]

—august

pairing: mattheo riddle x fem!reader

summary: mattheo chose you and still you wonder why he even broke up with his ex in the first place

warnings: feeling like the wrong choice, insecure reader, angst but fluff ending

notes: i just wrote a little drabble since i already had a planned fic ready for lacy, i hope you still like it!

her hair was flowing effortlessly over her shoulders, caressing her back like it was some sort of clothing. she looked effortlessly pretty in general, soft pink lips and warm brown eyes reflecting the light of the sun when she would walk through the courtyard.

and the worst thing about her? she was nice. simply put. you couldn’t even manage to hate her, because next to being beautiful, she had a charming personality, a great sense of humor and friends everywhere she went.

you had understood if she had hated you. you, the new girlfriend of her first great love. but she didn’t and that made it impossibly worse.

“hey, y/n” she had greeted one morning, a smile plastered on her face and happiness reflecting in her eyes. “theo mentioned that you had some problems regarding the divination essay” she said and added, before you were able to retort something: “i finished mine a few days ago and thought it might help you to read over it. it was indeed a very hard task, i struggled too”

“oh” you had said, dumbfounded, and stared at the pieces of parchment she was holding in your direction. “thank you, aurora”

“no problem” she grinned. “and rory is fine, all my friends call me that”

she had left in a hurry, having to return books to the library, and you spent your time looking after her in awe, surprise and insecurity flooding your features.

it was beyond you why mattheo had decided to break up with her. aurora turner was simply perfect and you certainly weren’t.

"what's going on in there, huh?" mattheo slipped into the space beside you, touching your head with one of his fingers softly.

"oh, nothing" you quickly excused, taking your eyes off of aurora and looking to the book in front of you. "this reading for muggle studies is just taking up my brain"

"romeo and juliet?" mattheo questioned, studying the leatherbound book.

"yeah" you sighed. "the english is kinda off"

"i know" he shrugged, turning the book around in his hands and opening it to a random page.

"you know?" you repeated, trying not to laugh. "i never as much saw you look at a book before"

"i liked this one" he smiled.

your smirk died down. "oh, i didn't know that" you tried to find his eyes. "why did you never mention it? i would've read it sooner then"

"it's not a big deal, that was ages ago" he paused, unsure if it was okay to finish the sentence, but you urged him on, nodding repeatedly so he would continue. "rory liked it"

"oh" you said plainly, before you realized that your reaction was all the more telling of your inner jealousy and insecurity about his old relationship. "i mean cool"

"y/n" mattheo muttered, laying the book down in front of you. "it really doesn't matter. we don't even have to mention it again"

"i don't want you to feel like you can't tell me something, just because you experienced it with your ex" you smiled, but it was costing you all your strength. "you can talk about the past, it doesn't bother me"

"that's clearly a lie" mattheo saw through you completely. "you shouldn't have to hide your feelings to make me feel better"

you sighed, realising that it was to no use to lie to him. "sorry, i just—" you shook your head "i don't even know why you decided to break up with her in the first place and i think i'm scared that you'll realize that at one point too"

mattheo looked at you with a soft smile, his gaze searching your eyes as if trying to convey everything he felt with just that look. "y/n, i'm gonna be honest. it’s not that rory wasn’t great," he began, his tone gentle. "she is a really good person, and there was nothing wrong with her. but that doesn’t mean she was the right person for me."

you blinked, trying to process his words as he continued.

"i realized that being with someone just because they seem perfect on the surface doesn’t mean it’s the right fit. we just didn’t connect in the way i needed. with you..." he hesitated, as if searching for the right words, "...it’s different. you make me feel understood. you get me in a way that no one else does."

you looked at him with so much admiration that he had to look down, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red.

"look" he said, when he was able to look in your eyes again. "dating rory was like constantly standing on a pedestal and people expecting me to be something different than i was. that didn't feel right, and it shouldn't. but being with you feels like coming home after a long day, realizing that there's someone in my corner even if no one else likes me for who i am and not for who they see in me"

"i didn't know you felt like that" you muttered, ashamed that you had possibly made him uncomfortable.

"i don't, not anymore" he smiled. "not since i met you. because i don't care about the others. i just care about us, you and me"

"i love you" you said as he kissed your cheek, pulling you closer by your waist.

"i love you" mattheo mumbled against your mouth. "don't ever think you're worth less than her, just because you're not her. if anything that's what makes you more special to me"

you nodded, teary-eyed, as he pushed his lips forward to meet yours. your hands toyed with the hem of his curls as he deepend the kiss.

after that day you never questioned mattheo's choice again. and you could see that both him and rory held a lot of respect for each other. but both were not even interested in anything deeper. mattheo never looked up when he heard her voice anywhere. rory never came to the tree you had often seen them kissing at, back when they had been together.

you realized that being enough for mattheo had never meant being perfect—it had only ever meant being yourself.

[jamminvroomvroom]

stress.

ln x fem!reader

finally finally finally uploading this! returning from my fic hiatus with some good old fashioned lando smut. feedback is always much appreciated! love you guys, thanks for being here <3 (pls tell me if the format is weird)

in which lando is stressed and so are you.

warnings: 18+!! smut, language, lando being an annoying little bitch, sliiiightly inappropriate workplace relationship, tiny bit of angst

1.7k words

he’d barely spoken since he’d jumped out of the car, helmet shoved at the first person he saw. his fingers worked through his sweat dampened curls, sheer frustration coursing clearly through his veins. they’d failed him, yet again.

your eyebrows were furrowed, the tension in your face conveying your deepest sympathy to him. it only angered him further. you gulped.

lando didn’t look at you again.

-

you trailed behind him awkwardly, every step he took seemed to shake with rage. he’d strutted from interview to interview, hardly biting his tongue. your warning eyes did nothing to soothe the sting of his words, he wasn’t even checking himself, just spitting sarcasm, his own personal venom.

you were quietly seething yourself by the time you made it into the hotel lobby, huffing as he continued to ignore you. the way your heart ached for him did little to ease your growing anger. you caught him as he ducked into the elevator while you were speaking to the woman at the front desk, trying to lose you. you snapped. you apologetically excused yourself, darting across the floor and into the metal box, the closing doors jolting back open.

“where the hell do you think you’re going?”

“don’t want to talk to you.”

“oh, for fuck sake, lando. are you five years old? we let you leave the track but we still need to debrief. you have duties.”

“yeah well, the team has a duty towards me, too.” he sneered.

“don’t you dare take it out on me. i didn’t build that tractor.” you bit back, pointing your finger at him.

he looked down at you, smirking, perhaps at your offhand comment. he looked evil, you couldn’t think of a better word. you felt hot, face red. working with him was, more often than not, headache inducing, especially lately.

“maybe i want to take it out on you.” his voice had dropped an octave, sultry, nostalgic.

your mouth was dry, lips parted. you felt like gasping for air, thighs clenching at his suggestion.

you swore this wouldn’t happen again. oh well.

you closed the gap, sighing in defeat, lips against his. he smiled, victorious in something, finally. you hated the hold he had on you. he was warm, familiar, hands at home on your waist. he pulled away to nip at your neck, bruising you deliciously. you swatted his arm in annoyance.

“knew you wouldn’t be able to resist after last time.” he taunted. if your eyes weren’t squeezed tightly shut, you would have rolled them.

the elevator dinged, and you were stumbling out, poorly composed. the lighting was dim, dim enough that he thought he could sneak a hand on your waist. you slapped him, hard this time. he laughed.

-

lando seemed to have cheered up the second you’d dropped to your knees at the end of his bed. one of his hands was wound in your hair, tugging harder every time your tongue ran over the vein that made his eyes roll back. he was panting, his neck flexing every time he threw his head back. you could feel yourself getting wetter and wetter each time he did, his tanned skin dampened with sweat, torso on display, muscles rippling.

just when you thought he was nearing the edge, he yanked you off of him, your balance momentarily lost as he pulled you off your knees on the carpet. lando steadied you in the narrow gap between his legs, glazed over eyes staring up at you, lustful and wanting. he kept his stoney eyes on yours, pupils blown as he ripped each garment of clothing off your body until you were bare, your flushed skin pressed to his. you seemed to prefer each other this way, naked, no talking.

you swallowed hard as you caught sight of your mclaren polo, crumpled on the floor, your mind suddenly riddled with the image of you being fired. as quickly as the anxiety inducing mirage arrived, it was gone, replaced by bright white nothing as you felt his lips hit the soft skin of your stomach. his curls tickled the underside of your breasts, one of your hands threading through the messy strands. you pulled his head back, leaning down to kiss him urgently, his hands finding the backs of your thighs. you were on top of him before you could even process it, your back against the mattress even quicker.

you remembered the last time, the frantic tearing at each other’s clothes, the blurriness, the way his giant hands seemed at home in all the places he touched you. the way your eyes rolled back and your toes curled and the way your name tore from the back of his throat. it had been carnal and desperate and a long time coming. so good, that you’d almost decided it was worth the risk to do it again.

your attention turned back to him as his hands grabbed at your hips, grinding you into him while he pressed open mouthed kisses over your neck, his teeth grazing your sweet spot. you let out a breathy moan, your body moving with his.

“you don’t know how much i’ve missed this. think about that night all the time.” he whispered. “this body, your pretty little noises, god. so perfect for me.” his breath fanned over your neck, your back arching.

“lando, please.” you whimpered, uncaringly desperate for him. he laughed, low.

“i know, pretty girl, i know.”

you were a mess beneath him as soon as his fingers found your core. you could feel him smile against your skin, taking a break from the bruises he was leaving against your neck. presumably he’d felt how much you needed him, your pussy slick. lando ran his fingers through your folds, finding your clit, teasing it between his fingers. you whined, writhing, thighs snapping shut to trap his hand.

lando pulled away, forcing your legs apart once more, snaking down your body until he rested between your thighs. his grip was iron-clad, unrelenting. your eyes rolled back the second he leant in, his tongue meeting your clit just as his fingers glided inside of you. he moved quickly, hard, the sound of your wetness doing nothing to shame you, and everything to get you both even needier.

“you like it like this, don’t you?” he taunted, as his fingers hit that spot your legs kicking out from the pleasure. you couldn’t respond, hearing him snicker quietly. it made you flushed, almost embarrassed to be so vulnerable underneath him, but it felt too good to care.

“please.” you cried out once more, no shame in your desperation.

he pulled away, crawling up your body painfully slowly, the kisses peppered across your abdomen making you shake.

“do you think about that night too? bet you’ve been waiting for this just as much as i have.” he whispered, hovering over you. “god, every time i see you at the track or in the factory, bossing me around like you run the place, i just want to bend you over and remind you who you think of at night.”

you blushed, hard, you lip caught beneath your teeth as he inched inside of you, teasing you further.

“come on, lando.” you groaned, wrapping your legs around him, pulling him deep.

you both moaned, ecstasy, stress relief.

“oh, so that’s how you wanna play it?” he asked, grinning down at you. the smirk painted on your face was wiped away instantly by his immediately unrelenting pace.

he was harsh, filthy, taking it all out on you. one of his hands dug into your thigh, keeping you in place, reminding you who was making you feel so good. the other hung loosely around your neck like a piece of expensive jewellery, making sure you kept your eyes open. the look on his face, that lazy, devious smirk, was enough incentive to keep you transfixed on his face, his eyes gleaming, the dark rings around them framing his intense stare.

just as you were nearing your end, he pulled out, flipping you onto your stomach like you were nothing. he forced you onto your elbows, back arched, ass up, your face lost to the pillows. a haze washed over you, bright white nothingness clouding your vision as he went even deeper. your mouth fell open, your silent scream burrowing into the comforter as you lost yourself, your orgasm beginning to wash over you.

lando felt you let go, pulling you up until you were on your knees in front of him, your back to his chest, the angle change making you whimper into the warm air of the hotel room. he held you still, his hand snaking around you until he found your clit, prolonging your orgasm, your body shaking against his.

you both collapsed into a heap, his sweaty body covering yours. you could feel his curls tickling your shoulder, his heavy breath fanning sending shivers down your spine. an open mouthed kiss to your shoulder blade had your eyes shooting open, your stomach twisting. it was soft, intimate, the opposite of how you usually spent your time together.

this was not like last time.

you needed to leave, urgently, escape before things got worse, weirder, even more unprofessional. it was stress relief, a way of releasing all of the pent up tension your jobs created between the pair of you.

you assumed he’d be happy to see the back of you, now that you were done with what you came here to do. you were proven wrong when he rolled off of you, pulling the duvet over your knackered body.

a complete silence fell between you as he switched off the bedside lamp, rolling over onto his side, facing you. he seemed pensive, like he was trying to decide what to say. and then, finally, he spoke.

“i appreciate you, you know?” he said softly, quietly into the pitch black space between you.

you smiled, thankful for the darkness surrounding you. you knew you’d gone red at his admission. your heart may have skipped a beat; you were probably just tired, you told yourself.

“see? i knew you weren’t a total asshole.” you murmured, back to teasing him. it was the safe option. you kicked yourself immediately. you’d just had sex with him, what good was playing it safe?

“you love it.” you could practically hear the smirk on his face.

“go to sleep, norris.”

-

thank you for reading! <3

-

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[leonstoenailunderhisbed]

A dancer dies twice

LeonKennedy x ballet!fem!reader

Summary: Leon attends ballet performances from time to time and a certain dancer caught his eye. An unexpected turn occurred and the favored ballet dancer stopped performing, causing Leon’s heart to break a little.

Warning: comfort/angst. mention of depression and weight loss. not proofread lol. nothing sexual but still.

a/n: I’ve been having this idea for quite some time lol. Why did I stop ballet dancing? Idk, I was a dumb kid lmao.

“A dancer dies twice - one when they stop dancing, and this first death is painful.”

The curtains were closed as Leon walked towards his reserved seat in the house. He wasn’t like other people nowadays dressing causally, he dressed up in his fancy suit. The first button of his dress shirt unbuttoned, just the way he always preferred. He finally got himself a small vacation and what better way to enjoy the weekend than watching a group of people dance along to Tchaikovsky?

He shifted in his seat as he looked over the pamphlet of the acts. He doesn’t know a thing about ballet but he does know that he likes the emotions conveyed in the way the dancers move. Whether it was the betrayal in Swan Lake or the serene feeling of the sugarplum fairy from The Nutcracker, he loved it all. But he would never admit it to his colleagues.

The orchestra began to play in a crescendo as the curtains pulled open, revealing a group of white dressed ballerinas huddled in a circle. And that’s when that serene feeling came. The ballerinas danced in their point shoes as their skirts moved gracefully every time they did a pirouette. It felt magical and he felt a sense of relief. Leon was an analytical guy, he analyzes everything he sees and tonight was no different. For tonight, he noticed a certain new dancer. Her hair tied up in the same bun as the other ballerinas but somehow it looked better on her. The white corset she was wearing hugged her lean figure just right, her arms moved under the spotlight swiftly. As if she was a doll. This was her performance.

Leon kept attending each time he could just to watch her. To watch the way her arm and leg angled perfectly at every arabesque she did, her grand jeté followed by the common chassé. She was just breathtaking. As if her purpose was to dance all night. And she did. She was the white swan. She was Clara. For months he watched as she slowly took over the main roles, she was that good.

But all that good came down with a price. Recently, he noticed the way she started to appear less and less. She danced the lesser roles now. And he couldn’t help but wonder why? Was she okay? Is she taking care of herself? For nights he felt worried. He even searched up her name online to find her social media. But the poor man couldn’t find it. It’s like all she did was perform.

Until one day, he spotted her walking down the street from her dance studio. He was out for a smoke when he saw her in her practice clothes, backpack over her shoulders as she walked towards her car. His eyes widened at the sight and he quickly threw his cigarette on the floor and put it out with his foot. He looked both ways before crossing the street and began to make his way towards her.

She didn’t notice until he spoke out to her, “Hey, you performed last week, right?” He asked even though he knew the answer already. She turned around and looked at him surprised but quickly smiled politely.

“Yes, I did. Did you enjoy the show?” She asked in her quiet voice, she seemed tired. He couldn’t help but nod as he looked down at her. “Yeah- you were amazing.” He mumbled under his breath, his heart beating fast as he began to feel his ears turn pink. She was even more beautiful up close.

And god was her laugh even more breathtaking. She giggled at his words and that only made him want to make her laugh even more. Just to hear that beautiful laugh.

It’s been a few days after their exchange and he couldn’t help but feel like a teenage boy for being able to get her Instagram. Turns out she purposely hid her account from the ballet house. Makes sense since she looked like the type to not want to be bombarded with messages from strangers.

They texted for some time and he kept attending her shows. He even bought her flowers after one performance in which she got the main role again. His heart nearly bursted into little pieces as he watched the look of surprise and joy on her face when she saw the flowers. He wanted to make this girl happy, as much as he could. So he kept bringing her gifts. And she kept them in a special memory box. It was all so romantic.

One day, she was walking home from dance practice with her headphones on. She was talking to Leon on the phone about some minor things like how much her feet hurt and how she needed new shoes. And he listened to her, no matter how much she talked because she talked a lot. He took in every word and analyzed it. Should he buy her the shoes? He would gladly spend his money on her if it meant she’ll keep dancing. If it meant she’ll keep following her dreams.

It was all going great until she noticed a car swerving slightly. She shrugged and kept walking as she talked to Leon over the phone. The car kept getting closer and closer until it swerved right into her direction. Her instincts jumped in and she was able to dodge the car, but her leg got caught under the tire. She screamed in pain and Leon quickly tracked down her location. He got his keys and drove to her, he didn’t care how fast he was going. He needed to be there, he needed to help her.

When he parked on the side of the road, he saw her holding on her leg as the driver staggered in his walk. He was drunk, Leon thought to himself. A drunk driver just ran over a dancer. A ballet dancer’s worst dream came true in the snap of a finger. Leon felt a lot of things. Anger, frustration, sadness, he felt it all. And his heart broke even more as he saw how much she was crying. He ran to her side and quickly called the ambulance.

He sat waiting in the lobby of the hospital as she was undergoing surgery. She had suffered a bone fracture and needed immediate medical attention. He stayed up as much as he could and waited for her. He would ask any doctor how she was doing, and honestly, no one told him anything yet.

Her assigned doctor finally came out and approached Leon. He told him that she was currently sleeping from the anesthesia but that he could see her. And he rushed towards the room she was in.

He saw how she laid on the bed, peacefully sleeping. He saw how she had wires tied to her arm. He heard the sound of her heart monitor beep at a normal pace. He slowly approached her and sat on the chair next to her bed. Leon took her hand and squeezed it gently. He couldn’t do anything except wait for her to open her eyes.

And he waited.

She slowly opened her eyes and looked around as her vision tried to adjust to the harsh hospital lights. She looked down at Leon’s head resting on her bed as he held on to her hand. She smiled softly until she looked down at the cast on her leg. Her face fell and her heart shattered.

Her quiet sobs reached Leon’s ears and he woke up immediately. He cupped her face with his hands and brought her to his chest as she cried. She wrapped her hands around his back and held on to him. Her whole passion and dreams were now gone. And it wasn’t even her fault.

She spent months in her bed, getting up only to eat and go to the bathroom. But that was it. Leon took the liberty to take care of her. To bathe her, to feed her, to try and distract her. But she always had that emptiness in her eyes. Her light was gone and she was no longer under the spotlight. The ballet house had to let her go since her leg was so injured she couldn’t dance ballet anymore. She could dance but just not ballet. And it broke her soul.

She would no longer wait for the curtains to open, she would no longer dance along to the orchestra, she would no longer spot Leon sitting among the crowd watching her. It was all gone.

Leon slept on the couch as he took care of her. But even from the living room he could hear her cries. He noticed the way she lost her muscle and lost weight.

He walked to her room and sat down on the side of the bed with food. “You need to eat, y/n…” he spoke softly as he laid his hand on her shoulder. “I’m not hungry.”

He couldn’t do anything but frown. He didn’t want to force her to get better but he also hated seeing her in this state. He would do anything to go back in time and prevented the whole thing from even happening.

He helped her shower, kneeling down against the bathtub as she had her back to him. She had her knees on her chest and hugged her legs. His fingers gently massaged the shampoo into her scalp. It wasn’t anything sexual. He was just trying to help her.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled under her breath as he poured water down her hair to wash off the shampoo. He furrowed his brows and replied back in a soft voice, “What for?”

She rested her chin on her knees and continued, “For all of this. I feel like a burden to you. You could be doing better things but instead you’re taking care of my depressed ass…”

His heart broke again, his fingers stopped going through her wet hair as he tried to think of a way to reply to her. “You’re not a burden… I chose to take care of you, none of this is your fault…” he whispered softly. She frowned as he kept washing her hair, “I know but… I just feel so… empty.”

He couldn’t do anything except stare at the back of her head with a sad look. He kept washing her hair and her body in silence. He wasn’t a man of words but he hoped that his actions spoke for the lack communication. He hoped she took his actions as a way of comfort. Because he knows what it’s like to lose something you love. He knows that feeling all too well.

He helped her into some new pajamas and tucked her to bed. He was about to leave when she took hold of his wrist, “Stay.”

She wanted him to stay.

And he did. He laid down next to her on the bed. She laid her head on his chest and cried. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. His shirt getting wet from her tears but he didn’t care. Leon ran his hand through her hair as the other rubbed her back gently. Her hands gripped on his shirt as she sobbed.

Her head remained on his chest as she slept after crying. And he did not move. He stayed like he told her to. Not because he was forced, but because he wanted to.

And he’d stay all the time if he was able to.

[last-herondale]

Almost Pt. 6

Bucky Barnes x Femreader!

Bucky POV

Angst, heartbreak, love triangle

Warning: none?

AN: We had state testing this week. My brain is fried. Sorry if this is trash but it’s my trash.

Enjoy 🤘🏼

It seemed that yet again I was standing there, watching you walk away from me after I had undoubtedly broken your heart. Again.

I tried to rationalize with myself that it wasn’t my fault. That the last thing I expected to happen that night was to run into you. Of course, I had dreamed of it. Concocted ways in my head of how I could accidentally run into you, just to see you. Maybe even talk to you. The ache in my heart from missing you had become a constant hurt. I had missed you while you were away, but after seeing you kiss Steve in the kitchen…after seeing you so happy…

I knew I had to step away.

I had been doing so well. Only seeing you when only absolutely necessary. Filling more and more of my time with missions and other distractions like Nadia, who seemed content enough to spend her time with me. I knew I was using her, and I hated myself for it, but I didn’t know how to handle the alternative.There was a certain torment in knowing you were back. In knowing that you were under the same roof as me, having a life that was becoming more and more distant from mine.

After tonight, I would be surprised if you ever talked to me again. I realized instantly that there was no excuse for what I said to you. I had been taken off guard seeing you pinning Nadia to the wall. I wanted to laugh at the scene before me. The shocked look on Nadia’s face, the stern, determined look in your eyes that was immediately overshadowed by the look of pure shock as you locked eyes with me.

There were a million things I wanted to say to you at that moment. A million feelings that came to the surface, and yet like an idiot, the only emotion I could convey, the only emotion I seemed to ever convey, was anger. The moment I began opening my mouth, the moment I saw the light in your eyes die out…

I went back inside of my apartment and grabbed my jacket before stepping out again. I knew there was no chance of me sleeping tonight, not after that. So I might as well torture my body in the training room as some sort of recompence for what I did.

The training room was empty, luckily. I started with the punching bag, made extra durable by Tony, and put the rest of my stupid emotions into that bag. Punch after punch I laid all my frustrations into my fists. The rhythmic thuds were comforting as I felt my chest heave after each breath. Sweat dripped down my forehead.

The slamming of the door took me out of my zone and I jerked in the direction of the entrance to see Steve standing there in the doorway. His body seemed eerily calm, with his hands in his sweat pockets, but he had a furrowed brow as he looked at the floor. I wasn't surprised to see him. I had insulted you, in possibly the worst way I could have. If you had run to tell anyone, it would have been your… I think the ache I felt now was over the fact that it wasn’t me.

“Up late?” I asked, grabbing a towel off of the rack and wiping my face. I didn’t look at him. I couldn’t.

“Yeah, couldn’t sleep,” Steve said in a flat tone, “Then of course I heard yelling down the hallway.”

I winced. Honestly I had been surprised that no one else had come out during the altercation. The amount of people in that tower that had super hearing… I turned towards Steve, trying to fix my face into some sort of nonchalant pose. I knew he would see right through it. Part of me wanted him to see right through it.

I wish he would just come out and yell. Let his anger come out so that I could match that energy. But Steve was never the guy to throw his anger out without cause. He was patient. He was understanding. He was a good man. Everything I wasn’t. So, rather than punching me in the face, he was just standing there, waiting for me to talk.

“Sorry for waking you, it's been a weird night.”

Steve kept his eyes steady on me. I clenched my jaw.

“Look, I don’t know what she told you–” I began

“She hasn’t told me anything,” Steve said calmly, “In fact, I can’t seem to get her to leave her room to talk to me. She won’t even pick up her damn phone.”

I couldn’t hide my shock. I thought surely after the altercation you would run to the man that has been providing comfort to you for the past few months. If you hadn’t then maybe what the two of you had wasn’t as deep as I first thought…

“I heard what you said to her, Buck,” Steve said in a cold tone.

My stomach dropped at his words.

“I didn’t mean it,” I said weakly, “I know I shouldn’t have said it, but I…”

My words seemed to fail me as I sat down on a bench. A couple of moments passed, but eventually, Steve sat down beside me and sighed.

“Bucky, you need to be completely honest with me. Do you love her?”

There it was. The question I couldn’t face. The answer came so easily in my head. Of course I did. What was there not to love? How was I to admit that I was lost without you? That turning you away was the worst mistake I ever made. I couldn’t look at Steve. I couldn’t talk.

Steve sighed again. Out of the corner of my eye I could see that he was rubbing his face. He was tired and exhausted. I was hurting everyone around me.

“Stop that,” Steve said softly.

“What?” I blurted out.

“Stop feeling sorry for yourself. You don’t do yourself any favors by pushing everyone away.”

When I didn’t respond, he continued.

“I know how hard you are on yourself, especially when Nat left. I know you thought you found your person in her, and after everything you have been through you deserve to find someone who not only makes you happy, but fills your heart with so much light that it overshadows the darkness. When you were in that pit of despair, I had no idea how to get you out of it, and I felt like a failure as your best friend. But then, she showed up. She came into both of our lives like a wildfire. She brought back the light in your eyes, and reawakened your soul.”

I felt hot tears down my face, but Steve continued on.

“I won’t deny that I’ve grown feelings for her. I think seeing her love you and care for you as much as I do, makes me see her in the greatest of lights. She is worthy of so much love. I thought maybe you… I thought that maybe you would love her… I thought that was where your story was heading Buck, but you chose differently. I saw her leave my birthday party. I saw how distraught she was. I could only assume that you didn’t have feelings for her as she had for you. That’s why I… that the only way I could live with myself for… feeling these things.

“But clearly, there is something there. You avoid her now like she is the plague. You hardly talk to me anymore and we are brothers, you and I. So, Bucky, you don’t have to say it, but I know you love her. In some capacity, I know you do. You can deny it all you want, but I know you.”

Steve sighed again. “I know you think you don’t deserve to be loved. I know it’s hard for you to see the goodness in yourself, but you deserve love. You deserve to be happy. If she is what makes you happy, you need to let her know. She deserves that, doesn’t she?”

Yes, you deserve everything.

“What about you?” I asked, my voice was shaky as I spoke. I finally looked up at him and saw his expectant blue eyes waiting for me. I was surprised to see that he wasn’t angry.

Steve gave a small chuckle.

“I have never been one to deny you your happiness Bucky,” his voice turned a bit solemn, “I care about her… a lot. She is one of my best friends, and the time we have spent together has been… great. But we have been honest with each other. We both have unresolved heartaches from the past that prevent us from becoming more. She doesn’t hold it against me for still loving Peggie, and I don’t hold it against her from loving you. Maybe in time, we could become something more, but for now our hearts do not beat for each other as they should.”

“So you don’t… love her?” I asked carefully. I didn’t like that I was beginning to sound hopeful. I wanted you to be loved. I wanted you to be cared for. I thought Steve would be perfect for you… I thought there wasn’t a chance in hell that I would be able to…

“I love her, but not in the way that she clearly loves you,” Steve gave me a smirk.

“I don’t know if she does anymore. I’ve been a complete ass to her,” I mumbled, putting my head in my hands.

“Oh I know,” Steve laughed a bit but then looked at me seriously, “So what are you going to do about it?”

I raised my head out of my hands. What was I going to do about it?

“Do you really think she could love me, after everything? After tonight?” I asked pathetically.

“I think,” Steve said carefully, “That you will have to earn her trust back. It’s not about making her love you again, she loves you, has loved you through everything. You messed up, and you realize that, so you need to change. Change for her, change because of her. You already have and you haven’t realized it. Now show her. Give her back the love she gave you, and more.”

Images of you flashed through my head. Memories of you laughing with me, holding me when I was a complete mess. Memories of you consoling me, telling me that I was worthy, that I was more than I thought of myself. These memories warmed my soul, as they always did. I realized that I wanted more memories with you. I wanted to be consumed by them. Enveloped in them. I need you now more than ever. I would always need you. Always want you. Always desire you. And I needed to show you how much you meant to me.

I let out a small chuckle.

“For an old man,” I said playfully, “You are really good at giving advice.”

Steve laughed and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

“Remind me to charge you for my services later,” he teased.

I clasped my hand on his shoulder. “Thank you Steve.”

He just gave me a hopeful look and slapped my back.

“Go get her, buddy.”

I was up and out the door before he finished the word. I didn’t know what I was doing, I didn’t know what I was going to say to you. Apologize. That's what I needed to do first. Grovel at your feet. Beg for any forgiveness you would be willing to give me. I was at your door, knocking in quick succession before I could fully think about what I wanted to say.

My chest was heaving and my palms were sweaty waiting for you. I knocked on the door again. Impatient, I put my ear against the door to listen for any sign of you. I heard the soft sound of your radio playing your favorite channel from your room, but nothing else. The sun was rising, and beams of sunlight were breaking through the windows of the tower.

It wasn’t unusual for you to be up and about early in the morning, but after the night we had, I know you didn’t get much sleep. But you wouldn’t be asleep with the radio on. You hated any sort of noise when you slept. I knocked again.

“Please open the door,” I begged.

Nothing.

A sick feeling spread through my stomach like ice. I shoved down the door in one hit. Your living room was empty, no sign of a break in or struggle, but you were nowhere in sight. I called out for you. Nothing. I scanned your apartment, looking for any sign of where you were. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, except on your nightside table there was an envelope. I approached it slowly, my hand shivering as I saw the name on the outside of the card.

Steve

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

don’t close your eyes (Matt Murdock x f!reader)

summary || Elektra comes back to town with one goal in mind- to get Matt back. She’d do anything to get him back, even harming his girlfriend.

wc || 1.7k

warnings || angst, mentions of blood, death

a/n || from this request. this is quite different to what I usually upload and I feel a little embarrassed in case it’s not good. it might be a little dark for some people, so I won’t be offended if you skip this one. I was listening to sad music while I wrote the last part, so be warned😭

masterlist + rules

taglist

through your eyes (part 2) ->

You and Matt were having a calm morning, quietly enjoying each other's company as you shared breakfast. 

“You okay?” You ask, noticing the way he suddenly tensed up.

“Yeah. I’ll be back in a moment.” Kissing your forehead to excuse himself.

Walking out of the apartment and into the hallway where he found Elektra leaning against the wall, waiting got for his arrival.

“What are you doing here?” He whisper shouts, not wanting you to hear while still being able to convey his disgust to her presence.

“I’m here to get you back Matthew.” She said slowly, stalking forward to stroke his arms.

“You need to go.” He says warningly.

“Not until I have you back Matthew.”

“I won’t ask you again.” Gripping onto her forearms.

“I love how rough you are with me… but that’s beside the point. I want you back.”

“No, I have a girlfriend.” He scoffs while ripping his hands off Elektra’s arms.

“That hurts my heart Matthew, but you must know… if I can’t have you… then you can’t have your little plaything.” She flirtatiously taunts.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He grits, growing frustrated with the conversation.

“Hm, well… I’ll kill her.” Pausing to make it seem as though she’s thinking. “Yeah, I will kill her.” 

“I don’t believe you.” He spits as he pushes her against the wall.

“My heart Matthew, listen to my heart… you know I never lie.”

He doesn’t reply, but she could tell by his lack of communication that he knew.

“You have until the end of the day to break things with her- oh and make sure to tell her that you love me instead, I want her to hurt.” She smirks. “The longer I have to wait… the more your girlfriend will suffer… so I guess I will see you soon Matthew.” Kissing his cheek before walking away. 

All he could do was stand there stunned. Matt knew Elektra was telling the truth and he couldn’t bare the thought of putting you in danger. He knew he had to let you go, he just didn’t want to. 

He takes a couple of deep breaths before walking back in, trying to clear his mind.

“Hey? Are you okay?” You ask sounding worried.

“Yeah.” Poking his fork into a potato.

“Matt?” You ask cautiously, sweetly placing your hand over his.

“I’m okay.” Smiling at you disingenuously. 

You wanted him to be honest, but you didn’t want to push. You told yourself that he’d come to you when he was ready, so you changed the subject.

“Breakfast was lovely, thank you. What do you want to do today?” Collecting the dishes to put in the sink. “We could stop by that new farmer's market? I think they’ve got some great deals. Or we could get coffee?”

“I don’t know, I’m sorry.” Rubbing the bridge of his nose. Your sweet and nurturing nature made this situation impossibly harder, he adored your pure heart and the thought of breaking it, made him spiral.

“That’s okay, or we can stay here?” You offer, sensing that he might not be in the mood to do too much.

Dropping his head into his hands as he exhaled deeply.

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” You ask warmly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“I can’t do this.” He sighs. 

“Do what?” Slowly pulling your hand away.

“I can’t be with you anymore, I’m sorry…” Dropping his head further into his hands so that they could block his ears, not wanting to hear the way those words destroyed you.

Standing still for what felt like forever, slowly stepping back and into the living room. You didn’t know what to say. Things were going so well, how could he change his mind so quickly? You didn’t want to fight it, it was clear he had made his decision. 

“I’ll… uh- um.” You stuttered not knowing how to respond. “Uh- I’ll go get my stuff.” You breathed strenuously, trying not to cry.

He could feel his own heartbreak along with yours, so desperately wanting to reach out and hold you. He knew he couldn’t make this any harder for you, so he stayed away. Listening to every stifled sniffle and every erratic pound of your heart.

Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you leave Matt’s bedroom walking past him and out of the door. You weren’t able to speak right now, too afraid of bursting into tears in front of him. Closing the door behind you. 

// 

It had been a few weeks since Matt ended things with you, and quite frankly you’ve been a mess. You’ve not been able to do anything recently so your apartment was in a state. You have been racking your brain trying to think of what you did wrong, what was missing or what you could’ve done differently.

You just truly missed him.

Today has been a slow one but you felt like you were finally getting there. You were able to put some things away in the kitchen, doing little jobs to help you feel accomplished. Doing small things to try to make you feel better. 

Pulling your hair into a quick ponytail, and throwing on a cardigan to get the mail from downstairs. Shoving your feet into whatever shoes were closest to the door, making your way to collect the months' worth of letters.

Walking back up to your floor you see Matt standing outside your door.

You couldn’t turn around because you knew he heard you. Slowly strolling forward. “Hi.” You greet politely.

“Hello, Angel. Please can we talk?” He pleads, smiling at you promisingly.

“Okay…” Opening the door. “Sorry about the mess.” Scattering around to awkwardly tidy around him. 

“I can’t live without you.” He says quietly to the floor.

“Why’s that?” 

“I only love you, I didn’t mean what I said... It was Elektra.” Painfully smiling at you.

“What do you mean?” You meekly ask.

“She threatened you, and I couldn’t let that happen… so I had to let you go- but… I just, I can’t live without you.” 

“I’m confused.”

“I’m sorry for throwing this all on you. I just needed you to know.”

“I don’t get it.”

“I love you. You’re the only person I love… and I’m sorry that I hurt you.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?” You ask, a slight pang of sadness in your tone.

“It was Elektra. I couldn’t stand being around her… she just isn’t you.” Walking towards you, opening his arms to offer a hug.

You didn’t have to think about it, melting into his embrace. Squeezing each other tighter and not wanting to let one another go. 

“I’ve missed you.” You mumble into his chest.

“I’ve missed you so much.” Resting his chin on your head while he stroked over your back. “I’m so sorry.”

The door swings open and clatters against the wall. “Where is she?” A female voice shouted.

He spins you both around so that his back was to the woman, holding you in front of him to protect you. 

“We had a deal, Matthew.” She taunts, smashing your photo frames and dropping your vases to the floor. 

“Elektra, please just stop.” He yells, gripping you tighter. 

“I don’t like when people don’t hold up on their part of the deal.” Stalking forward, slashing her dagger into the back of your sofa and tearing it open. “Remember what I said?” She taunts once more, throwing your books and candles against the wall. 

“She’s not a part of this… what can I give you instead? Just please don’t hurt her.” Cocooning your head in his arms, trying his hardest to keep you safe.

“I’m afraid not Matthew. I told you what would happen.” Itching closer to you both. Teasingly brushing her fingers along your hands that were gripping at Matt’s back. She yanks on your arm, separating you apart and pushing you to the floor. Straddling your stomach as she edged her sword along your jaw.

Matt immediately dives to push her from you, dragging her along the floor to get her as far away as possible. 

“Go.” He shouts over to you, panic and fear riddled in his voice.

Sliding yourself away to pull yourself up, gripping the sides of the coffee table for support. 

“You’re quite the fighter sweetheart.” Elektra taunts you, trying to free herself from Matt’s grip. 

She slams him back into the wall behind and runs towards you. Picking up her dagger from the floor and burying it deep in your stomach. Twisting it a couple of times before yanking it out.

Matt stood there paralysed before realising what had just happened. Rushing to your side to hold you, helping you down so you didn’t fall. 

“No no no, what have you done?” He whispers, putting pressure on the wound. “No no.” His voice breaks. “I’m so sorry.” Holding your neck to support you. 

“It's okay.” You say quietly.

“No, it’s not.” A tear falls and lands on your cheek. “Please don’t close your eyes, just wait okay- we’ll get help. Just please hang on.” 

“Someone help!” He shouts, trying to get attention from your neighbours. “Please call an ambulance. She’s losing too much blood, please?” He begs Elektra who was sitting on the armchair indifferently reading a magazine. 

“I love you. So much.” Reaching your hand up to stroke his cheek. 

“Please don’t go, you’re all I have left… hang on just a little more. Help!”

Resting your head on his leg while he placed his other hand on the wound, firmly pressing and trying to stop the excessive bleeding. “Count with me, Angel. One.”

“One.” 

“Two.”

“Two.”

“Three.”

“Th-“ Your hand dropped from his face.

“No no no, don’t-“ his voice breaks, holding behind your neck as his other hand continued to press onto your stomach. “Please talk to me… We’ll get help, okay?” He reassures you, but he was actually reassuring himself. Leaning over to rest his forehand against yours. “Stay with me, stay with me, stay with me- please? I love you.” Gently shaking your head to keep your eyes open. 

He could feel you slip away, tears freely spilling from his eyes and down onto your face. Holding your cheeks with his bloody hands, trying to keep you conscious. Pulling you closer into his lap and holding you tighter. 

“No no no no.” He mutters against your skin, hearing your last raspy breath before your eyes flutter shut for the last time. 

[noona-clock]

Fourever 🍀 Didn't Know

Hiiii~ this is me again. I really want you to write about their song "don't know" from their Fourever album. It's like she fell first, but he fell too late kinda trope. Just by thinking of it, I know you'd really do a good story.

I already imagined Brian as the ml 🤭🤭

<3

Thank you so much for your patience, lovely anon! I hope you like it 💜

Genre: Small Town!AU, Unrequited Love, Angst

Pairing: Young K (Brian) x You (Female!Reader)

Words: 3,760

A/N: This is a continuation of the Let Me Love You story.

Welcome to the Show 🍀 Happy 🍀 The Power of Love 🍀 Get the Hell Out 🍀 Sad Ending 🍀 Let Me Love You 🍀 Didn't Know

I didn't know that was your love I didn't know that was how it was back then It was so natural that we were always together I didn't think it was special How are you doing now? I think I know a little bit more now The answer you wanted to convey I understood it until after it was over

A Long Time Ago

Brian hopped from one foot to the other as he waited for Sungjin (or anyone in Sungjin's family) to come to the door. He'd knocked already, but he had extremely urgent news to share, and it felt like he'd been waiting here forever. So, he started to knock once more, his eyes widening as the door open before he finished.

"Oh, hey, Brian," Sungjin answered casually.

Brian couldn't wait a second longer. "There's a moving van next door!"

Sungjin furrowed his brow and leaned outside, peering at the house in between Brian's house and his own. There was, indeed, a moving van parked in the driveway.

"Neat," Sungjin commented with a slight smile. "Did you see anyone?"

"I think I saw a kid around our age," Brian began, but then he scrunched his features in distaste. "But I also think she's a girl."

Sungjin's shoulders slumped, and Brian knew exactly how he felt. The two boys had been friends for a few years now, ever since they'd started school; while their friendship was practically perfect, they'd both been itching to create a friendship trio. For some reason, having a third person just felt right, like they would complete the friendship somehow.

But a girl? Who wanted to be friends with a girl?

So, Sungjin simply stepped aside to invite Brian in, and they both dashed to the living room to play their favorite video game of the month.

Once the weekend was over, Brian trudged down his driveway toward the bus stop, his bookbag slung over one shoulder.

It's not that he hated going to school -- quite the opposite, in fact -- he just hated not being asleep right now.

He perked up when he saw Sungjin on the corner of the street, though, and he perked up yet again when he saw Sungjin wasn't alone.

Oh yeah! There was a new neighbor! He'd completely forgotten about her -- most likely because it was a her. But, still.

So, Brian picked up the pace, jogging briskly to the bus stop to join his friend.

"Morning," he greeted once he got close enough.

Sungjin turned around, a smile blooming on his face. "Hey, Bri," he said. And then he turned back around to face his fellow bus stop occupant and added, "That's Brian, my friend I was telling you about. He lives on the other side of your house. Brian, this is Y/N, our new neighbor."

Brian raised a hand to wave at you, and you grinned somewhat shyly at him.

When the bus arrived, Sungjin sat next to you while Brian sat behind you; he leaned forward the whole time so he wouldn't miss any part of your conversation, his chin resting on yours and Sungjin's seatback. If Sungjin had decided to talk to you, then Brian would, too.

As the day went on, it turned out that Sungjin had decided to show you all around school -- even eat lunch with you! So, Brian did, too. And by the end of the day, it kind of felt like you'd always been there. Brian almost forgot he'd had reservations about you because you were a girl. Maybe girls weren't so bad after all? Or at least you weren't.

Your way of speaking was warmer than anyone else You were more happy than me The tears that you shed with me I didn't know that was your love Your expression that was awkward but exceptional The confession that I turned over as a joke The last greeting that you said to be happy I didn't know it was love at that time

As the years passed, Brian had to frequently remind himself how lucky he was to have the two best friends in the world. To him, you and Sungjin were simply part of his everyday life. But when he noticed that other people's friends weren't by their side 24/7, he knew just how lucky he actually was.

Sungjin was there to give him advice during tough situations and when Brian had to make hard decisions. Sungjin was there when all Brian wanted to do was play video games as a way to escape from the stresses of real life. And when Brian randomly decided he wanted to learn how to play the bass guitar? Sungjin said he'd always wanted to learn how to play the guitar, too.

And you were always there to stop him from making very embarrassing fashion statements. You were there to laugh and cheer him on when he and his classmates made up the stupidest math dance ever. You were there, by his side, almost every single time he'd ever cried -- and you cried right along with him, no matter what the tears were for.

It never, ever crossed his mind that things would change. That things ever could change. Not with the Three Musketeers.

But then they did, and Brian hadn't even seen it coming.

The three of you were in your final year of University -- you'd all gone to the same school, of course, and Sungjin and Brian had been roommates every year -- and things had been perfect. None of you had failed any of your classes, you'd all made some new friends while still maintaining the bond of the Three Musketeers, and Brian really hadn't thought things could get better when he'd started dating Justine, the girl from his Calculus class he'd been crushing on since the first day of class.

But then he came home from a date one night to an empty apartment, called Sungjin to find out where he was, and... everything changed.

"...Oh," he said after a few moments of silence.

Because how else was he supposed to react to what Sungjin had just told him?

"Yeah, and if you ever let on that you know, I'm going to --"

"Yeah, I get it," Brian interrupted, sighing under his breath. "I'll see you later, then?"

Sungjin hummed, and Brian quickly ended the call.

...You liked him?

You. You had... feelings? For him?

How? Why? Since when?

Sungjin had sworn him to secrecy, so he couldn't even ask you. He could potentially try to pry the answers out of Sungjin, but he'd also mentioned on the phone that you were trying to get over your crush, so it wouldn't be helpful to bring it up again. Right?

Brian would just have to try and forget he knew anything.

But, of course, as he lay in bed that night, he found himself thinking back to every interaction he'd had with you lately. Had the signs been obvious and he'd missed them? Had your smiles been different than normal? Had your 'have fun!' and 'good luck!' texts before his dates with Justine just been a cover? When he'd stress cried the other week, had you been crying sympathetically, as you'd always done? Or had you been crying because you... loved him?

In one way, he felt like a total idiot. Looking back on things, it should have been obvious. But in another way, there's no way he could've been able to tell. You truly hadn't acted any differently lately! You'd always been such a kind, supportive, and caring friend, and when it really came down to it, he couldn't pinpoint when you'd started developing feelings for him. Nothing had changed!

Except, in actuality, everything had changed. And he would have to act like it hadn't. He would have to act like he didn't know and everything was still normal, was still as it had always been.

Do you still laugh a lot these days? I miss your bright smile The jokes that we shared My lighthearted self from that time now weighs heavily on me

Maybe it was dramatic to think this but deciding to break the promise he'd made with you and Sungjin to move back to your small hometown after graduating from University had been the most difficult decision of his life.

Part of the reason it had been so difficult was because Brian felt he couldn't ask Sungjin for advice like he usually did.

After that phone call, Brian had fully committed to acting as if Sungjin had never said anything. It had been... strange. And each time he'd found himself unconsciously becoming distant, he'd sent a text to the group chat asking who had time to hang out.

By the time graduation had rolled around, he and Justine had been dating for over half a year. He had met her parents, and she had met his. He'd told her 'I love you' for the first time a couple of months prior. In other words, their relationship had gotten pretty serious.

So, when Justine had suggested he move back to her hometown with her, it really hadn't been that out of the blue.

Still, though. It had taken him by surprise because the idea of not moving back with you and Sungjin had never once entered his mind.

He'd thought about it long and hard. He'd weighed out the pros and cons. He'd lost many hours of sleep. And, finally, he'd settled on moving with Justine.

If you had really had strong feelings for him, the best thing he could think to do was to keep his distance -- quite literally -- so you had a chance to get over him. Plus, he could still visit, text, and call you both all the time. And what he had with Justine also wasn't something he was willing to give up. Sure, they could've tried long distance, but in Brian's opinion, it was much easier to keep up a long-distance friendship than it was a long-distance relationship.

So, he'd moved away. He'd found a job in this new city and moved into an apartment with his girlfriend.

And, looking back even now, he had no regrets. He'd learned and grown so much as a person, and once the learning and growing had stopped, he'd ended the relationship and moved back here after over five years away, not even counting his time in University.

To be honest, he barely thought about the fact that you'd once had feelings for him. As soon as he moved back (into the same apartment complex as you and Sungjin, of course), things with the Three Musketeers had gone back to normal.

Brian would be lying if he said he didn't notice a tiny shift in your and Sungjin's friendship, though, but that was to be expected. The two of you had spent probably every day with each other for more than five years, so there's no way you wouldn't have grown closer to each other than you were to Brian.

Something else he noticed was how much he'd missed you -- more than he'd realized, honestly. The first time you'd laughed at something he'd said, the sound had warmed his heart. It was strange because it's not like he hadn't seen you since moving away! He had! That certainly hadn't been the first time he'd heard you laugh in years, but it felt that way.

And that had been when he'd decided to try his hardest to go back to the way things used to be -- before Justine, before your feelings, before University even! Things had been perfect back then, and he was determined to make them perfect once more.

There's no going back Even if I keep looking back I tell you, but you aren't here I was in love We were in love Leaving the time is far away That I can't return to

Isn't it funny how, no matter what age you are, you can always look back on your younger self and shake your head and go 'Oh, you sweet child, you were so dumb and had no idea what you were talking about'?

Brian had been so set on turning back time and recreating the friendship dynamic the Three Musketeers had growing up, before the complications of young adulthood and University life had... well, complicated things.

Obviously, that hadn't happened.

But it was okay!

After Brian moved back home, as time went on, the three of you had built a new friendship together. It was definitely different and new, but it was still beautiful.

And, to be honest, over the years, he'd kind of forgotten that you'd ever had feelings for him.

Then, one day not too long ago, Brian had received a text from Justine. He had been over at your place for a movie night (Sungjin had been having dinner with his parents), and normally, he wouldn't have opened a text from anyone during movie night... but you had been at your front door accepting the pizza delivery, so he'd pressed on the notification.

He hadn't been expecting anything out of the blue -- he and Justine were still friendly and spoke to each other every so often. So, when he opened the text and saw a picture of Justine's left hand adorned with a rather large diamond ring, he'd actually let out a "Whoa!"

"What?" you asked, sliding the pizza boxes on your coffee table and plopping down next to him on the couch.

Brian tilted his phone so you could see and said, "Justine's engaged, I guess."

"Wow!" you chuckled. "Congratulations to her. Who's the lucky guy?"

"One of her brother's friends, I think," Brian shrugged, sending a quick 'Congrats!' reply before sliding his phone back into his pocket. "I never met him."

As Brian leaned forward to open the pizza box and grab a slice, he saw your concerned expression out of the corner of his eye.

"...Are you okay?" you asked quietly.

"Hmm?" Brian hummed. "Oh, yeah, of course. Justine and I are cool, I'm happy for her."

You let out a soft chuckle and moved to get your own slice of pizza. "I don't think I could ever be cool with an ex," you admitted. "Especially not someone I dated for, like, ever."

"It was six years -- okay, yeah, that's a long time," Brian smirked. "I don't know, there's nothing to not be cool about, I guess."

"Wait, speaking of. Hasn't it been almost that same amount of time since you broke up?" you asked.

Brian's forehead wrinkled as he thought, and then he simply nodded.

"You haven't dated anyone yet? Anyone? What's up with that?"

"Nothing's up with that!" he scoffed, playfully shoving your leg with his foot. "I've been busy, okay! And, honestly, look who's talking. I don't recall you telling me about going on any dates recently!"

You shrugged and took a bite of your pizza, but Brian could've sworn he saw your mouth twitching up into a shy smile.

"Come on, spill," Brian nudged.

"There's nothing to spill!" you assured him.

You were avoiding his gaze, though, so Brian knew you weren't being entirely truthful. Oh well -- he would drop it for now since you obviously weren't ready to share.

It wasn't until after he'd left your apartment later that evening that he realized he was still thinking about your reaction to his dating question.

You were definitely hiding something... but what? What could you possibly not be comfortable sharing with him?

...Unless?

No, it couldn't be.

Could it?

The reason you hadn't shared any details about your romantic life with him surely couldn't be that... you still... had feelings for him. Right?

He vividly remembered what it felt like when Sungjin had told him all those years ago that you'd had feelings for him: his heart had dropped like lead because he'd felt so bad. He hadn't questioned whether or not he'd returned your feelings because there had been nothing to question. He simply hadn't seen you as anything other than one of his very best friends.

But thinking about it now... wondering if maybe your feelings had resurfaced... it was certainly a different experience. His heart didn't feel anything like a hunk of lead. It hadn't dropped down into his stomach, and he didn't feel sorry for you.

Of course, none of that meant anything, but he figured he would let these thoughts marinate for a bit and see what happened. He would keep a watchful eye and a listening ear out to try and pick up on any other signs that you might like him again -- as more than a friend.

It took approximately three weeks and four days for Brian to conclude that you most likely did like him again -- as more than a friend. Short of telling him straightforwardly, the majority of your words, actions, and body language all pointed to romantic feelings.

I mean, maybe he was just imagining things, but your smiles around him seemed brighter than normal. Your laughs seemed extra loud. You couldn't go ten minutes without resting your hand on his arm or shoulder or just brushing or leaning against him.

The kicker was when the two of you had yet again gotten on the topic of dating. Brian had been talking to Sungjin earlier that evening about setting him up with one of his co-workers, and after Sungjin had left, Brian had (maybe not so subtly) asked if you wanted to be set up, too. He had plenty of single co-workers!

You turned him down, which honestly seemed like you wanted Brian to dig deeper.

"Oh?" he questioned, tilting his head curiously. "And why not? You don't trust me to set you up with someone?"

"No, it's not that," you replied with a chuckle. "I just... don't need to be set up with anyone right now."

Brian quirked an eyebrow at you. "What does that mean?"

It's not like you were fresh out of a relationship and trying to get over an ex.

"You're so annoying!" you whined, playfully shoving him. (See? An excuse to touch him). "If you must know, there's someone I have my eye on."

Brian gasped, reaching out to put his hands on your shoulders and turn you to face him head-on. "What? Who? Is this new? Why haven't you said anything?"

"Nosy!" you accused. "It's pretty new... kind of. I mean, I've known him for a while, and I think maybe I've liked him for a while, I just..."

But then you shook his hands off of your shoulders and stepped away.

"Anyway! You don't need the details."

"Uh, yes, I absolutely do," Brian countered.

Because he was pretty sure you were talking about him.

And suddenly, images flashed through his mind of going on a double date: Sungjin and Brian's co-worker with Brian and... you.

He liked you.

Brian liked you.

As more than a friend.

All of this time he'd been spending with you had made him realize just how... perfect you were. You were smart and hilarious and compassionate and beautiful, inside and out. Honestly, he'd been a fool this whole time for never realizing that.

But he was a fool no longer. He recognized how amazing you were, and he wanted to be with you.

He wanted to go on a date with you, and if his hunch was correct, you wanted to go on a date with him, too.

Before he could say anything, though, you made an excuse about picking up something from your parent's house and left Brian's apartment.

Obviously, Brian told Sungjin almost immediately and, from there, began planning out how and when he would confess and ask you out, officially.

He couldn't believe this. Things were actually working out. You had feelings for him, and now, he had feelings for you. At the same time!

Over the next week, Brian tried to drop hints -- the same hints you'd been dropping lately. He smiled extra brightly at you. He laughed extra loudly at your jokes. He touched your arm, shoulder, or hand at any opportunity. And he definitely didn't bring up the idea of setting you up with one of his co-workers again.

Finally, when you sent a text to the Three Musketeers group chat about getting the promotion you'd been gunning for at work, Brian knew the time had come. He suggested going out for pizza the next evening, and that would be the perfect time to confess to you!

He worked it all out with Sungjin beforehand: Brian would go pay, Sungjin would take you out to the parking lot, and once Brian had left the restaurant, Sungjin would get a "text from his mom" asking him to come help her with something. And that's when Brian would take the opportunity to tell you how he felt.

That's when his life would change, when your Happily Ever After would begin.

Brian's heart hammered inside his chest all throughout dinner, and especially when you'd all cleared your plates and he said, "I'm going to go pay, and then I'll meet you guys outside, okay?"

"Deal!" you grinned.

His stomach flipped at your grin. God, you were so pretty. How had he gone over twenty years not seeing just how pretty you were?

Before he left the table, Brian shot Sungjin a Look, and Sungjin nodded once.

It took everything in him not to ask the cashier if she could hurry it up; he silently reminded himself that five extra minutes wouldn't matter in the long run, not when the 'long run' quite literally meant the rest of his life.

In ten years, when the two of you were happily settled and married, neither of you would remember if Brian had confessed to you at 7 PM or 7:05 PM.

Still, though. It wasn't ten years from now, and the two of you were not yet happily settled and married. So, Brian was anxious to get a move on!

When the cashier finally handed over his receipt and thanked him, he dropped a few bills into the tip jar, turned on his heel, and booked it out of there.

His gaze swept over the parking lot as soon as he stepped foot outside, his heart and stomach flipping over when he spotted you and Sungjin.

He took one step toward you... but then...

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion after that.

Brian watched as you lifted your arms and stepped up to Sungjin, pulling him into a tight embrace. He watched as Sungjin returned your hug, his hands grasping you, his arms holding you in a way that could only be described as 'more than friendly.'

What was going on?

You pulled back after just a few moments, but just when Brian thought maybe it had simply been a hug goodbye, you stood on your toes and...

You kissed Sungjin.

Remember when, all those years ago when Sungjin told him that you were trying to get over your feelings for Brian and his heart felt like lead?

Well, it felt like that again.

His heart felt like a ton of lead that had just been dropped into the ocean and was now sinking down to the bottom.

You didn't have feelings for him. You had feelings for... Sungjin.

How had he read the situation so wrong? All of your bright smiles, loud laughs, gentle touches had meant nothing?

And what made it all worse was the fact that you'd had feelings for him at one point.

He was just about 10 years too late.

[rking200]

Choices and Disasters

Simon and Josh bicker within the elevator while they await Markus and North to call them up. In the hallway to the broadcast room, fear grips Markus as he sets out to ruse the guards, which leads to Simon getting shot. The speech must go on and the plan continues. A hostage escapes and a SWAT raid ensues. Simon is unfortunately victim to their rounds, but Markus comes to his aid. Up on the roof, Markus must make a choice and live with its consequences.

4k words, chapter two of a three four chapter SimonxMarkus angst/hurt-comfort/R18 fic. Chapter one can be found here. This would be the start of angst, which will overflow into the next chapter. Then R18, if plans don't change (again). Will be posted to AO3 upon completion.

「Everything okay?」

Simon hated that Josh knew him so well. He had only just gotten into the elevator, and now he was locked in this cage with Josh until Markus called it up to their destination. He tried to figure out what to tell Josh and what wasn't important to share in this moment, but the deafening silence after Josh's question must've been too much for him. With a hand placed on Simon's shoulder, Josh spoke again to Simon, worry dripping from his words. 「Are you alright.」 It wasn't a question at all, but it felt nice for Josh to be so worried about him, if he was being honest. He let too much time pass a second time, and was quick to open his mouth once Josh squeezed his shoulder. 「I'm fine, Josh.」 He glanced over at Josh, who didn't even budge. His eyes were seeking some tidbit of information Simon was keeping from him and Simon--against his better judgement--had to look away. 「I promise.」 He knew that Josh wasn't about to buy his half baked promise, as his weary eyes and closed posture didn't exactly scream 'you can trust my words at face value'. Josh huffed, squeezing Simon for a prolonged moment. Simon knew what he was conveying with it: that he cared about him and just wanted to know what was on his mind. 「We can talk about it later. Now's not the time.」 Unfortunately, this didn't satiate Josh and only proved to irritate him further. His hand was quickly taken from Simon's shoulder, exasperatedly thrown into the air before jerkily resting at his sides.

「Simon, what's going on with you recently? You're not acting yourself.」 Strange, Simon thought. He felt like he was more himself now than ever: shy and an anxious mess. What exactly was Josh insinuating? 「If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine, but pushing me away isn't going to do you any good either. And if you didn't like the plan, you should have spoken up. I can't be the only one.」 「It's not like that, it's just...Markus.」 Simon cast his eyes to the side, consequently turning his face so that Josh could fully see his LED, blinking yellow. Simon hoped that Josh would just understand that there was some sort of romantic attachment to his words so that he didn't have to outright explain what had happened in the bathroom stall. He shook his head, begging the memories and feelings not to resurface.

「Yeah, I get it.」 Simon quickly looked over at Josh, processing his words. 「He shows up in Jericho and then thinks he can run the place? Tell us all what to do, putting us in danger with no remorse?」 Simon stared at him, his mouth moving but no words coming out. He shook his head, gluing his eyes to the floor as he concentrated on something to say. 「He expects everyone to fall in line and follow his word. How do we even know if he has our best interests at heart?」

「No, that's not it at all.」 Simon closed his eyes tight, shaking his head a few times. 「Markus wants to help us.」

「Help us?! You're following him blindly! I used to be able to trust your direction but I can't anymore. You're doing what he wants and not what's best for our people.」

"Markus wants us to be free." Simon's gritted teeth steeled the nasty words he had wanted to say, but Josh wasn't going to back down at the slightest bit of pushback. "Yeah, and he'll kill as many of us as possible to try to achieve that. We can't put all our stock in one man, someone we don't even know!" Simon turned to face Josh, his lips a thin line and his eyes threatening to overflow with emotions. "At least he's doing something!" Josh's eyes betrayed his shock in Simon's outburst, and he opened his mouth to say something in retort, but found himself interrupted as the elevator lurched. Simon's anger didn't subside, but his anxiety now flared along with it. Hopefully it was Markus, and they were now beginning the last leg of their plan. It wasn't often that Simon raised his voice, and he found it difficult to control his clenched fists and his furrowed brow. Yelling at Josh didn't make him feel any better: he knew it wouldn't change his mind and he also knew he'd have to talk about that outburst again, in private when they got back to Jericho. He wasn't looking forward to it, and Simon found himself even more reluctant to share the events that had transpired with Josh.

His hands trembled around the cool metal of the round explosive, another item that hadn't ended up in his hands by chance. But Markus cared for him in some compacity. Personally cared for him. He couldn't afford to assume Markus saw him as expendable at this rate, as he had before their rendezvous in the bathrooms. Especially with Josh's push-back, he had to hold faith in Markus and in his plan.

Markus was simultaneously put at ease and back on edge at the opening of the elevator door. He watched Simon carefully, reaching to take the device from him and focusing on his furrowed eyebrows. He looked angry, and Markus hadn't really seen him like this before. He wondered what had happened between now and the last time he saw him, but decided not to press further as he glanced at Josh, who was also visibly upset.

If something had gone wrong, they would have said something. This had nothing to do with the plan, and that was what they had to focus on. Maybe if the tension was still palatable between the two when they got back to Jericho, Markus might mention it. He had other things he had to discuss privately with Simon, however, and his fight with Josh might just fall a little lower on that list. His gaze caught Simon's and he softened slightly, allowing Markus to take a deep breath and focus once more on their mission. With a few words of encouragement and the help of the explosive device, they were a hallway away from their goal. North and Josh resumed their gentle bickering, as usual, and Markus felt the weight of their cause on his shoulders, pressing firmer than ever. "What do you wanna do, Markus?"

He met eyes with Simon. They had to deal with the guards, but it was in their best interest not to kill them. "Wait here."

Walking out into the hallway, Markus ran through the plan in his head. Get the rise on them, threaten with his gun, knock them out. No casualties. They were here to demand peace, and they had to lead by example. But something happened, and Markus couldn't explain it even if he tried. He stepped out and, upon hearing the guards' voices, he froze up. His hand twitched as he reached for his gun, but he felt absolutely frozen in place. Was this fear? The weight on his shoulders was solidifying him in place, pressing down through his shoulders and deep within his stomach. He didn't need to breathe, but he found it hard to nonetheless. The fear pressed harder still as he watched the guard reach for his phone--as he watched him call for backup. Seeing North come to his rescue wasn't what pulled him out of his fear-locked state. It was the gunshot that did that, and even then it took him a second to turn his eyes to Simon.

"Simon's been shot!" Josh was squatted down at beside Simon while North moved the knocked-out guards out of immediate view of the elevator. With the pressure slightly relieved, Markus found his footing and quickly went to Simon. He placed his hands on either shoulder, kneeling down right in front of him in an attempt to demand his gaze.

"I'm okay, I can keep going!"

Simon's words rang out only as Markus' worried glance washed over him, and Markus wished Simon hadn't immediately looked down as he spoke. His words had been rushed, slurred, and he couldn't tell if Simon was telling the truth. That alone made him briefly consider abandoning the mission entirely, but they couldn't turn back now. Furrowing his brow in concentration, he looked over Simon's wound and scanned him for his status. He wasn't stable, nor was his shut-down imminent. He would be alright as long as they got out of there and got him some blue blood quickly. The return to Jericho would be difficult with a wound, but as long as he could walk they shouldn't have any problem getting him there. He hurriedly helped Simon stand up, and he was quick to glance at him, connecting to mentally ask if he really was okay. He received no glance and no reply. Markus knew that he had really let Simon down, and that weighed heavier on the back of his mind than the thought that he had let his people down.

Markus placed his hand atop Simon's as he placed him to lean on the security desk, his other palm lingering as he moved it across the back of Simon's shoulders. He hoped Simon appreciated the gentle show of affection and reassurance. He removed himself from Simon's side, taking a step away and cautiously watching him sway even with his hands planted firmly on the sturdy desk. He paused, probably to North's irritation, waiting for Simon to gain his bearings. Simon turned and swayed again as he did so, his weight unbalanced and shifting over to the hurt side. He was losing blue blood, but his LED shone a comforting yellow, which meant he was relatively stable, but they had to hurry. Markus didn't have any more time to waste. Gripping his gun tightly in his hand and moving quickly down the hallway, Markus prepared to press the button to ring the door to the broadcasting room. He glanced around at his comrades, his eyes briefly meeting Simon's as he looked over his shoulder at him.

The furrow of his brow didn't suit his soft features, nor did the burning something in his eyes. Markus assumed it was resentment, but maybe hatred. He couldn't tell, and Simon would never give him any answer.

With a gentle nod to his team, he pressed the button. The irony of seeing Josh raising a gun against a human wasn't lost on Markus, but he had more important things to do than dwell on it. He ordered the operators aside, watching their planted deviant blink yellow as he did so. A nod from Markus was all it took for the JB300 to shine blue, and he looked forward to thanking him personally for his role in all of this. Markus hadn't been looking when the human shoved Josh to the ground and evaded North's grasp, but he was quick to turn on his heel and raise his gun to their escaped hostage. The man fell as he desperately tried to escape, and although Markus had hoped he would see the gun trained on him and stay down, but he got back up and scurried along further still.

"Shoot him, Markus!" "No, don't kill him!" "He'll hit the alarm--do it!" "No, don't shoot!!"

Markus had meant to make a choice, but he paused too long as he awaited Simon's opinion that he missed his chance before he had even realized. Watching the doors close after the human's retreating form, Markus focused his eyes on his gun before letting it fall to his side. Exasperated, he tried to compose himself before turning around to his three companions. "Hope you didn't just get us all killed."

Markus shot North a pointed glance before settling his eyes on Simon. They held the other's eye contact for a moment, something stirring within Simon that Markus wished he would just say aloud. Is this what he had wanted, to follow the plan to a T? No killing humans, even if it put the rest of their plan--the most important part--in danger? Or was Simon disappointed in him for his choice, or lack thereof?

He made his way to the middle of the room, standing in front of Josh and removing his Stratford hat. He held the brim in his hands for a moment before giving it a toss. The act of flinging the hat proved to calm Markus' heightened nerves every so slightly, but North interrupted his moment of contentment and approached him, demanding his eyes, his attention.

"Think carefully about what you're going to say, Markus. Your words will shape the future of our people."

He already knew the words he was going to say, they had been mulling in his head idly from the moment the plan had started to form. Maybe North had meant to calm him with her words, but they just put him more on edge. Who was he to be the public figurehead for their people as a whole? Was he responsible enough to hold that power in his hands, after getting someone so close to him shot because of some simple fear weighing him down?

But, Markus had a speech to give, so he calmed himself and was prepared to tell Josh he was ready when Simon's voice rang out, muffled and pained. "Markus, your face."

Hearing him speak with such a tone in his voice sent a pang of regret through Markus, but he pushed it down to focus on getting out of here as soon as possible. He glanced at Simon, his eyes settling on the blue blood upon his lips before he quickly looked away. How could he forget something so important? He tried to take North's words to heart and thought over his speech once again as he removed his skin, gently telling Josh he was ready. Markus calmly spoke of peace to the humans. He spoke of their demands for equal rights and the need for justice against android-targeted crimes, as well as the abolishment of their slavery and segregation. Jericho was no home, it had just been a place of refuge and it always would be, and he wanted nothing more than to see his people living happy lives in houses their owned, in houses they worked to maintain. So, their demands were rounded out by their need for places to live, thrive and be free. Markus didn't like to use the word "ask", given the circumstances, but found himself ending his speech with it, anyway. It was more important to end on a note of peace than to fight with the semantics, but he was sure that the humans would feel the brooding storm of revolution under his peaceful words either way.

Markus had only barely finished his speech when Simon's voice rang out, warning them of the incoming raid. Simon and Markus were in the most vulnerable position, and with Simon's wound he was in even more peril. Simon was fast, even when hurt, but the rifles the SWAT team entered with were faster. Markus watched helplessly as Simon was caught in the fire. Keeping behind the center console he watched Simon try to crawl to a safer place, and Markus hadn't meant to repeat the very obvious words of "they're coming", but they left his mouth in the panic of the moment. It was as Simon replied, simply and without emotion telling Markus to leave him behind, that he realized how badly Simon had been shot. His eyes darted to the hole in the center of Simon's chest--too high to have hit his pump regulator, and on the wrong side to have hit his actual thirium pump...but it was a bad wound. There wasn't even a second of hesitation. He was sure Simon hated that he disregarded his words so quickly and so incredibly easily, but he wasn't about to leave him behind. He grabbed him as North and Josh attempted to give them the cover fire they needed to safely retreat onto the roof. With Simon's arm slung over his shoulder and his hand grabbing his tightly, he forced Simon to put his weight into him, pulling him along the wall and attempting to not get either of them shot down in the process. Simon's legs weren't working correctly, and the dead weight was tough to combat in the moment, but they made it to the stairwell. He pulled Simon along, with no intent to hurt him in the process but no consideration against it due to the severity of the situation. He released his grip on Simon and watched as he immediately fell, scrambling to place his back against something for support.

The fear once again washed over him as he got down to Simon's level, eyeing the leg that he watched give way beneath him--the one that he felt be dead weight while he was pulling him to the stairway. Simon confirmed what Markus already knew: he couldn't move it. Either of them. He watched the panic in Simon's eyes, and he knew they were both thinking the same thing.

This wasn't going to work.

"Okay, don't worry." Markus' words deliberately went against what he was thinking in an attempt to ease the panic in Simon's eyes. "We're going to get you back." He couldn't say it while holding eye contact, and he knew avoiding Simon's gaze was the worst thing he could do in the moment, but he couldn't lie directly to him like that. The simple act of looking away nullified the words and any comfort Simon might have been able to find in them.

"They're coming, Markus. We have to jump now."

Markus knew they didn't have much time, and her reiterating it only made him feel himself spiraling more. He stood, quickly taking a few steps away from his companion and leaving him to join the huddle with Josh and North. There was no doubt that Simon heard the exasperated sigh as he moved away, but he only hoped he understood that it was the situation that he was upset with, not him. He felt a pang of remorse as he realized that no, he should be upset with himself. He had been the one who got Simon shot in the first place, and without that first wound throwing him off his balance, he would've been able to sprint to safety that much faster. North and Josh turned their backs to Simon, but Markus wasn't about to cut him out of their huddle. He kept his eyes trained on Simon as Josh and North reinforced how horrible the situation was, chancing to look at them but always returning his gaze to Simon. He caught his eye for just a moment and leaned, fully tilting his head to try to keep it as Simon quickly looked back down at his legs. He couldn't dwell on the despair he had seen for just that moment, but he knew it was something he wouldn't soon forget. Perhaps it was that fear again that made him side with North. In the moment, she was right. He had to shoot Simon to stop the humans from finding out where Jericho was. North claimed that it was up to him, and his eyes sought out Simon to hear his opinion on the matter. Yet there wasn't an opinion for him to give, as he was on the outside of the situation at hand. He was just a liability in this circumstance, and had it been the JB300 operator Markus knew that he would do what had to be done for the sake of their cause.

With a deep breath and a sideways glance to North, Markus stepped away from their huddle and in front of Simon. He looked down at him and did his best to ignored the pang in his chest as Simon didn't return his gaze. He watched Simon staring off, unfocused, for a moment before raising his gun to him. Maybe it'd be better, he thought, if he didn't look at me with those eyes of his.

"I'm sorry, Simon." Markus immediately regretted saying his name as Simon raised his gaze to him, looking past the gun and deep into his soul. "I don't have a choice." The words were more of a justification for himself than for Simon, but Simon's reply caught him off guard nonetheless.

"There is always a choice."

His voice came through clearer than Markus was ready to hear. Simon had spoke tiredly, with clear effort not to slur or waver under Markus. He kept his eyes and his gun trained on Simon, his hand wavering under Simon's gaze. There was no anger, no hatred or disappointment. Markus wished there would have been because it would have made pulling the trigger that much easier to do.

Instead, Markus became lost in their pleading. The snow flitted between them, slowly falling as time seemed to come to a damn near halt. He wished Simon would just tell him what to do--both options felt like the wrong choice for vastly different reasons. He scanned Simon's face for a hint of something, but fear was all he could read from him. It lingered in his eyes, danced upon his brow and reflected from the leaking blue blood on his lips.

He closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath and letting himself fall back into the moment they had shared with one another. He had been so taken aback by the interest he had perceived in Simon when he was changing. He hadn't meant to act without much thought, but years of watching soap operas with Carl must have really done a number on him. He recalled the touch of their bare lips against each other and he felt the immobilizing fear melt away. Despair took its place, and along with it: love.

Markus' ears tuned back into the world around them, the thuds of the SWAT team trying to brute-force the lock on the roof door meant that they didn't have any more time to think. He let out a held breath, shaking his head and watching as Simon relaxed, ready for him to shoot.

"I won't kill one of our own." Markus caught Simon's eyes as he opened them, but the pleading and the fear were still all that he could see. Holding the gun by its barrel, he held it out for Simon to take. They shared some kind of exchange, their eyes locking fleetingly before Markus had to turn. "Let's go."

「Markus...」

He really had wished Simon hadn't have spoke his name directly, so faint and weak. The voice that echoed through his mind was nothing like the one that spoke a moment ago. It was pitiful, pleading to not be left behind, begging to be dragged along but hesitant to put anyone else in danger for his desires. Markus knew that if anything were to haunt him, it would be the wavering thought of his name as he left Simon alone to deal with an impossible foe on this forsaken tower. Strapping his parachute on, he chanced glancing back at Simon to see that he had moved, watching as he attempted to stand and whisk himself away to hide in a safer area of the roof. He didn't have much time to mourn the hopelessness of the act, as the SWAT team broke through. They had run out of time. Racing to the edge of the roof to jump led to no causalities, even with the team shooting at them from such a close range. If they had tried to shoot their parachutes down, they had failed spectacularly.

The wind took them into its arms, safely carrying them forward as the snow storm obscured them from their pursuers.

The act of flying would have been invigorating had Markus' mind been clear. Instead, the wind howled in his ears, the snow stung his face and the feeling that he had forgotten something--somebody--very important atop the Stratford Tower jolted every nerve in his body.

[the-tmnt-ficfinder]

Ficfinder finds: The Lemonade Leak

Chapter 6: The Liar

Chapter 6 Summary: No summary

The Liar: Appraisal and Ratings

(Don't know what fanfic "Appraisal and Ratings" means? Check out my explanation on my Main Masterpost! Looking for a different fanfic to read? Head on over to my Fanfic List Masterpost!)

Disclaimer: This fanfic is only available to those who have an Ao3 profile. This fanfic is written by @turtleinsoup, so go show them some love and support!!

The fanfic ratings are not based on quality, favoritism, or how good I think it is, but rather, how intense a subject may be. Like a movie review, or the tags on Ao3, letting the readers know what to expect.

Plot: 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Plot is four out of five!! So first of all, the plot for this chapter is really intergang!! There's finally enough layers built up, that things are becoming confusing, and intricate!"

Suspense/Mystery: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Suspense/Mystery is five out of five!! Ah man the mystery in this chapter was superb!! Plus, the way it builds up, leaving certain questions unanswered, for sure makes it suspenseful!!"

Angst/Hurt: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Angst/Hurt is five out of five!! The way Leo and Donnie interact, cold and uncomfortable, where Leo is just desperate for his twin, gosh its angsty!! The hurt is not so much physical (though it is there) as much as its mental. Things are going wrong, and no one knows how to fix them."

Fluff/Comfort: 💛🖤🖤🖤🖤

"Fluff/Comfort is one out of five! A brief moment of comfort happens between Raph and Leo, though all in all, this chapter has minimal comfort, and zero fluff."

Emotions Conveyed: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Emotions Conveyed is three out of five!! This chapter is FILLED with confusion, sadness, and intrigue!! Reading this chapter gave me an almost lonely feeling."

Drama/Tension Level: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Drama/Tension Level is five out of five!! Oh heck the drama in this chapter!!! The tension!! Oh my gosh!! I seriously thought someone might snap."

Triggers: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Triggers for this chapter are three out of five. This chapter is triggering in different ways than the normal violent ways. More emotional triggering this time. Anyways, make sure to stay safe, and read the tags!!"

Legibility (Reading): 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Legibility (Reading) is four out of five!! Chapter 6 of The Lemonade Leak, like all the others before, is a treat to read!! Would recommend it!!"

Legibility (Audio): 💛💛💛💛💛

"Legibility (Audio) is five out of five! The way Leo's thoughts just roll together, and blend into the writing really makes for an enjoyable read!!"

Length: 💛💛💛🖤🖤

"Length is three out of five!! Chapter 6 of The lemonade Leak takes about 20-21 minutes to listen to!!"

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The Lemonade Leak: Story Ratings and Chapter List

Personal thoughts on chapter below cut (Contains Spoilers)

Starting right off, I want to highlight the Chapter name. "The Liar." Man, this name really suit the chapter!! Donnie is lying to Leo, manipulating him. Leo is lying to his family about getting hurt. They're all lying to each other, and its insane!!

“Mikey and Raph do too. They said you need more space and all, but you’re up in the stratosphere and still not coming for breakfast.”

I enjoy this little play on words here. While it could just be Leo joking around, with the way he misses Donnie, its almost like he's communicating that Donnie feels further away, like he's in space rather than needing space. I dunno, sometimes my mind gets carried away with these concepts.

Leo looked from Raph to Mikey, then found Donnie’s perfectly calm stare again. His heart hammered; and he felt cold realization crawl down his spine. Donnie was lying to the team, and he was lying well.

To be honest, I felt a lot of dread in this bit. Donnie, lying well, when he is notoriously well known for poor lying?

“Oh, yeah, that does sound hard,” Donnie clicked an animalistic little chirr. “Seeing your twin not using his weapons with a parasite. Seeing him intentionally take damage! How our awesome 'leader' jumps at the chance to get his ass kicked by human-controlling excrement. Must be so hard to process.” Oh. Leo’s stomach fell. Suddenly the other’s eyes moved away from Donnie and settled on him. He stepped backward.

The manipulation right here is skillfully done. In the beginning, Donnie's sentences sound as if he were agreeing with Leo, but in just the wrong light. Then, in the next, he immediately shifts the conversation, along with the blame onto Leo's shoulders. Donnie knows he's well known for having poor lying skills, so he plays on that, using his families bias towards that fact to win this argument. Raph and Mikey have no reason to not believe him, especially since getting hurt seems like a Leo thing, and lying seems like a Leo thing. Leo is pretty much backed into a corner at this point.

Mikey’s eyes gleamed with unshed tears as he turned to Leo. “And you!” he croaked. Leo raised his palms. Mikey’s cheeks gleamed wetly. He rubbed his sleeves over his eyes and let out a shaky breath. “Did you think- Are trying to get hurt?! Seriously?!”

Oh, just another instance of Mikey having to be the mom of the group, endlessly worried about his brothers.

“I’m doing better than a squirrel in a bag of peanut puffs, dad. You should prop up your leg,” Leo said, rummaging through a cabinet for the cleaning supplies, one-handed.

Man, these boys have parental issues. Though Leo called Raph 'dad' sarcastically, how sarcastic is he really? Splinter hasn't shown up once and the boys are in desperate need of a parental figure.

Leo closed in; aiming for his most obnoxious voice. He stood, leaned over the armrest and looked down at his older brother. “Aw, scared I’ll kick your ass? I’m the leader now, Raphael. Wanna find out why?” “Leo.” “You know I’m the one eating your donuts, right? I don’t even like strawberry frosting, I just wanted to know when you’d say something. Never did! Man, no wonder Dad choose me to replace you, heh?” he said. Because he was not a leader. Because he was selfish and stupid and a good punch to the jaw might set his head straight. Please. “Leo.” Raph’s claws left grooves in the armrests. But then he pulled back and run a hand over his face. “Why’re you always trying to get me to…?!” His eyes narrowed and found Leo’s stitched arm. “Is it true?”

This is actually a response to low dopamine. Fighting incites adrenaline, whether it be physical, or verbal fighting. The adrenaline excites the brain, and ends up creating a dopamine response. Leo has very low dopamine levels right now, and whether he means it or not, is subconscious is urging him to pick a fight, feel the adrenaline, and get back some dopamine.

Raph let out a shaky breath. “I…” And Leo recognized the twitch in his muscles; the effort of stopping his body from reacting to something that wasn’t there anymore. “Sometimes I wake up,” Raph said, “and I still feel it. You. Your fingernails. And I can’t hear anything, but I can feel you trying to talk to me-” Raph’s voice suppressed a tremor. “And then I see all your…” Raph gestured at Leo, “Your… what I did to you. And I…,” Raph’s voice broke in his throat.

I KNEW Raph would end up having trauma related to the fingernail scars on his hands!!

The thought made him wince. They already used Mikey like a stress-toy and blanket-warmer and his little brother deserved so much better, than have Leo pull him into this too.

I feel like the key word here is not how they used him, but that he is 'used'. They all have a purpose in the family, just as Donnie's purpose is to build things, Raph's purpose is to protect, and Leo's purpose is to guide, Mikey's designated purpose is to mediate. Whether they like it or not, they all have a purpose. Whether Leo likes it or not, he assigns a role to everyone in his mind. Everyone has a place and a place for everyone.

Donnie’s voice sounded small in the back of his head, ‘Do you ever feel like you can’t get away?’ Leo’s throat dried up. “Get away from what, Raph?” Raph stared at him. “From inside my head.”

By now, if you've paid attention to what's going on, its fairly easy to guess what's going on with Donnie. Though, only if you've paid attention, because like I've said before, cryptic sentences and hints are the only information you get till later.

[split-spectrum]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the tag @thegreatwicked :)

1. How many works do you have on AO3? Three

2. What's your total A03 word count? Just over 65K

3. What fandoms do you write for? Just Star Wars, right now.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

I only have 3 total fics 😅 but I'll list them in order of kudos:

Water and Rock - Obi Wan x Reader, slow burn with smut

Four Hours - Din Djarin x Reader, basically a one-off but in two chapters, porn with minimal plot

Pretty Young Thing - Obi Wan x Reader, one-off, porn with almost no plot

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! I really appreciate people taking the time to comment, so I certainly want to let them know 💜

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? In the Star Wars fandom, I don't have any multi-chapters with endings, so I'll say Water and Rock since it contains the most angst lol

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Pretty Young Thing is just shameless wish fulfillment on my part lmao

8. Do you get hate on fics? This is so funny and I'm glad I get a chance to answer it - yes! I've written for several fandoms in the past and had mild criticism, and a long time ago there was actually ~drama within the same realm as my work, but not directed at me. However! I very nearly stopped posting after only two chapters in the Star Wars fandom because I immediately got an incredibly rude DM right off the bat. Honestly, it stung to the point I wasn't interested in sharing more. But after that, I received so many other kind comments it really turned things around and made me want to continue. I'm so grateful for all the sweet messages and comments you guys send. It makes it fun to share, which of course is what fanfic is all about :)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Absolutely, yes. I write F/M currently although in the past I've also written M/M. I just don't feel as comfortable or good at it. I like vanilla stuff for the most part with some kinks, but I'm not really into BDSM or anything that includes violence beyond mild things.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I have, but not for Star Wars. In a past fandom, I wrote a crossover for Futurama that was very fun. Nothing smutty, just for laughs.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware. One of the funniest crimes, though, if you ask me. Not to anyone who's had a stolen fic. That must feel awful. But for the person stealing someone else's work and taking credit? What on earth could you be trying to accomplish with that?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yeah, I had a 30-something chapter AU once upon a time that was completely translated into Russian. I didn't even find out until a few years later that it was on a Russian website with like a devoted readership and the translator giving author's notes on what they felt I was trying to convey in certain chapters. It was overwhelmingly flattering, but also strange that the translator never tried to reach out to even speak to me about it lol. Still, an amazing feeling, that someone enjoyed my writing enough to translate it for others. Gets me choked up 🥲

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, I was once a part of a 4-person google doc collab for a fic and it was unbelievably fun.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? All TIME? That is a tall order. I have to cheat and give multiple answers, I'm so sorry. I think it was @pickleprickle who mentioned Diana×Worf from Star Trek TNG and I absolutely love them.

Ben and Leslie from Parks & Rec.

A niche mention, but: Aloy and Kotallo from Horizon Zero Dawn (the videogame). I am OBSESSED with their dynamic and clawing, gnashing, biting, etc that it's not canon.

And since I just finished the Chiss Ascendancy Trilogy: Thalias and Samakro girlies please rise up, I am so in love with them 😭

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Speaking of Thrawn... still have a fic with him on the back burner, and I don't ever know that it will get posted.

I also have a smutty Obi Wan one-off that was started ages ago, like 4-5 months ago or something and I'm about 50% sure it won't get finished but I really really want to. I keep coming back to it but never finishing which is VERY ironic considering it's... uh... it's edging.

16. What are your writing strengths? I feel like my answer to this could change based on the time of day lol but I will say I feel strongest when writing dialogue and I've had the most compliments regarding characterization.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Oh, where to begin? 😄 I definitely suffer from the classic overuse of commas. My setting descriptions leave a lot to be desired, and I really wish I made more use of similes. I once had my work described as "clinical" regarding an interaction between two characters. I like to think I've learned and grown since then, but I still find myself jealous of people who are skilled with real, fleshed out, poetic descriptions.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? All depends on the writer. I know people who are amazing at it, and it comes off as natural. Myself? Not so much. And I wouldn't care to attempt it, tbh.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Listen... it was a long time ago...

Inuyasha 🧍

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? My all-time favorite is from an old fandom I don't particularly like to engage with anymore, and it's sadly no longer posted for that reason. I will say my current favorite fic is Water and Rock and I can't wait to post the next update. :)

No pressure tags! @cosmicsierra @djarins-cyare @grapenehifics @firstofficerwiggles @spicemaidenfic @eveningserenityyy

[ordinaryschmuck]

Quick Thoughts on the first two episodes of the Percy Jackson TV Show

Percy Jackson and the Olympians, the original book series, changed my life.

I know that I've said that with The Owl House, which rains true for the present day. But Percy Jackson is a book series that pretty much formed my love and style for story telling. Back when my fifth grade teacher read this to my class, she not only introduced me to a great book series but to a type of fiction that I didn't know I needed. Stories that managed to find that perfect balance of epic adventures, heart-tugging drama, and hilarious comedy. For years, I've been seeking out books that scratch the same itch Percy Jackson did, but never really found anything beyond Rick Riordan's other work. On top of that, the series formed my style of story telling. Did you pick up my level of snark in my fan fiction? The way I manage to form dialogue? You want to know what book series inspired all of that? Percy Jackson did, and I owe everything to it.

So when Disney+ announced that there was going to be a TV show, one that followed the books and had Riordan himself being closely involved with it, I was excited...but a little cautiously optimistic. It was great news that the series would follow the books, but as a Disney+ original? With other Disney+ original content ranging from mediocre to bad aside from a few exceptions? Yeah, I...didn't have faith in this, and the faith became weakened when I heard the show was going to be in live-action. Call me an animation shill, but I always felt like animation was the perfect medium for Percy Jackson, what with the insanity that the series goes through and the ideas that need to be conveyed in ways live-action couldn't. Just imagine something like The Owl House or even Avatar: The Last Airbender's style for Percy Jackson. It would have been GREAT.

Still, I didn't want to be all doom and gloom. I wanted to give this show a chance, even if it didn't follow the story EXACTLY or fit with the animated show I kept in my head for years. I would be open minded and see if it was still a good show regardless, and if these first two episodes are anything to go by, it might be...sort of.

In terms of the characters, everyone is on point. I buy that a lot of these actors are the characters they're portraying, and everyone nails the right amount of energy. Especially Walker Scobell, who IS Percy Jackson. There's SOME awkwardness because, you know...child actor. But when it comes to the sass, angst, and occasional stupidity of the character, the boy does great at the job and will hopefully improve as the years/seasons go by.

As for the action, it's pretty well-choreographed and epic. The Minotaur fight especially looked cool and surprisingly NOT hindered too badly by relying on CGI. It looks good enough where I can believe it, even if it's very obviously a CGI bull.

And then the comedy. THANK THE GODS for the comedy staying in tact. It was a big part of what drew me in with the books because while it can break my heart with drama or leave it pumping with action, it can be pretty funny a lot of the time. Just look at the chapter titles. They're full of sass and jokes, and it's important to keep that energy when adapting it. The show does a great job doing so while adding a few jokes of its own that feels like it would have fit in well with the books. I don't THINK Mr. D tried to make Percy think he was his father so Percy would get Mr. D some cheap booze was in the books...but dammit, it would fit PERFECTLY.

So, overall, I'd say this show definitely nails the energy of the books, being intense and comedic with the actors doing a great job at portraying the characters. However, while the show understands the energy, it kind of crumbles when it comes to telling the story.

Firstly, there ARE some changes. It's to be expected, because if I wanted every single bit from the book exactly as they were...I would have just read the frickin' book. I don't need all the exact details and I'm fine with writers taking liberties for the sake of making an adaptation standing out on its own. And no, I'm not tearing my hair out over the characters being a different race or Percy being blonde. As long as the actors still feel like the characters, which they do, there's nothing to worry about. But there are some narrative changes that I can't help but question. And, yeah, this is going to be SLIGHTLY spoilery, so be warned that if you haven't checked out the show yet, this is your last chance to skip ahead to the bottom.

Now, there are changes that I like. I like that they introduced Mythomagic early. It's a little detail, but it's a nice one to add and could maybe give Percy something to bond with Nico a bit when we finally get there. I also don't mind Sally giving Gabe that East Coast sass, making her more willing to stand up to his crappy behavior. It takes the punch out of the tragedy of her being stuck with him, but it's great to see Sally stand up for herself and it still works in showing that it's a situation she doesn't want to be in. But then there are...questionable changes. Like Chiron giving Percy Riptide when he broke his pencil. Like...No. The dumbass kid would have uncapped it immediately. NO.

Also, was that Grover's girlfriend? I mean, it's kind of cute on paper to introduce Grover's girlfriend this early, but the actress is VERY MUCH older than our baby-boy playing the goat kid, and it is uncomfortable seeing them give each other heart eyes with this VERY NOTICEABLE age difference.

And then there are changes that are made due to cutting time. Like cutting out the scene of Percy and Luke training with swords and choosing instead to have campers say "Luke's the best sword fighter in camp." You gotta SHOW instead of TELL for a TV show, Riordan. And then there's the fact that the Hellhound didn't show up, proving that the camp isn't safe for Percy and makes him believe that it's Hades who stole the bolt instead of...jumping to a conclusion. I don't need EXACT recreations of the book, but these are necessary beats for the story and even the future of the series. But we cut them out because this is a six-episode season and we need to skip as much as we can.

This brings me to why it's not a good thing that this show is a Disney+ original: Disney+ doesn't make TV shows, it makes MOVIES. Long, extended movies that are split into six or eight parts because they put too much money into an already short budget for anything lengthy. Sure, you get great stuff out of that like Loki and...I don't know, Andor? I only watch the Marvel stuff on that platform. But the problem is very much present with the Percy Jackson TV show. If this was a movie, I'd be more forgiving if we skip a lot of stuff so we can tell the story a lot faster. But because it's a TV show, something that SHOULD have all the time in the world to tell a story, it feels rough that it has to skip a lot for that six-episode limit. Because of it, we're breezing by so much that it feels like the story's on fast-forward yet also slow enough to have scenes like Grover being with his girlfriend--Seriously, am I the only one uncomfortable with that?

I WANT to say that Percy Jackson the TV series is GOOD, as it does understand the energy of the books. But the story and the pacing is questionable at times and it REALLY holds the series back. At least for now. Who knows, maybe things will get better as the season progresses or even if the show progresses. This IS only the first two episodes, after all. It can always get better...but it can also always get worse, but I'll wait until I've seen the whole show at least.

[serendipitouscontaminant]

Sorry to pop in again so soon, but I just had to return and offer a little more praise.

Okay so after reading the 3rd part and letting all of that settle on my soul - and getting over my initial "omg I fricking love this fic" excitement - I just need to say I am floored by your storytelling prowess. Your description of things are so immaculate that there's no question as to what you mean and how that feels/looks/sounds etc. Lines like "Barbie feels like her insides have been scooped out and replaced with fragile things. She has to move slowly, breathe carefully, to keep from jarring them, because they’ll grow stronger but they haven’t yet." Perfect. Anyone who's been there knows exactly how that feels like and knows you've described it to a T. I love how you were able to take complicated things like that and put words to them.

Your characterizations are spot-on. Ken saying he felt "spinny"? Like yeah, I could totally hear it in my head, and it was definitely believable he said that. But more than that though, you helped us readers understand what these two were *feeling* and did so without sacrificing who we saw in the movie. It's like I was a doll experiencing humanity for the first time too, in all its good and bad.

The detailing of how they feel about being human - "but she still wakes up with her flesh and blood heart beating too fast and her flesh and blood skin sticky with cold sweat (yuck)" - and how they're coping with it - "Gloria feels her stomach lurch when she sees his hands, cuticles and nails picked at and chewed on, every imperfection worried at until they’re impossible to ignore. Barbie has the same problem, but a spinning ring and a flawless manicure every time she gets her hair touched up have mostly taken care of it." - are beautiful in their own way. I really can't get over how you've really helped the readers put themselves in their shoes and feel as they feel in their newfound humanity.

Not to mention how you've developed their platonic soulmate AU which I am HERE FOR. I love it so much, like that last part with their foreheads touching had me in tears. And the angst - my word! - also had me in tears too. Those poor babies.

Anyway, as I said before: you're a genius with wonderful gifts, and thank you for sharing them with us. I will definitely be keeping an eye on your Ao3 to see any more posting in the future if you so choose to do so. But please, please may we have at least one little thing where Ken gets some happiness please? I think he's earned it, but that's just me.

I'll leave you alone now, but I just really needed to share this. Thanks again <3

Thank you SO much for this and I am not put upon at all :D I love getting compliments about my work lol so definitely don’t apologize

Genuinely thank you, though, because I’m so glad you feel that way about the fics. I’m trying very hard to convey the humanness vs. dollness of it all, and to have the characters talk and act like themselves, just in this really weird and often sad situation. I’m also glad the spinny lines worked lol. I was like “how would Ken describe the feeling of spiraling?” and that’s what I got.

AND YEAH, someone said in the comments on the first fic that it was giving dark soulmate AU vibes, and I was like yayyy love that that was noticeable, and I’ve kept leaning on it because I think it’s so interesting. (Though the darker aspects have faded.)

And lmao I swear Ken will have a good time soon!!! I genuinely started feeling bad for him at a certain point in the last fic of the trilogy and I was like “man, I need this guy to pet a horse or something and possibly not even cry once within three thousand words.” But he’s going through the very beginning of the adjustment period in that trilogy, so it is Not easy. But again—things will look up for him now!!! I have plans!!!

(I do also have plans for more heavy angst, but my threat of a fic where Ken just overall has a great time still stands. I actually have plans for it to maybe be the first fic in the vignette collection that will probably be the last entry in this series. But plans change, so don’t quote me on that. Things WILL look up, though.)

(Also, obligatory link to the series: something in me in you.)

[onewhositswithbluejays]

hi!!! ✅🎶🤔 please :)

Thanks for sending me some asks ^.^

✅ list one or two favorite lines you’ve written and explain why they’re your favorite

There are a few lines in chapter two of "Indivisible" that absolutely gut me, and I'm impressed by my ability to write lines that make me emotional even though I'm the writer. That chapter won't be posted until this coming weekend, but I couldn't resist giving it an honourable mention.

I actually really struggled to narrow down other favourites so indulge me as I share a few :3

From chapter 1 of "Catching Feelings"

There was a collection of voices but only Daulton’s was understandable. “They’re taking you to the hospital, Danny. I need you to go. I need you to be okay.” I need you to be okay, the echo caressed his lips.

I'm really happy with these lines because I thought it was an effective way of portraying how the true reality and Danny's view of other realities kind of overlap/blend. I also thought it was a good line to show how the echo of Daulton kissing him kept "echoing" the way our brains sometimes fixate on impactful events.

From "On Record" (archive locked)

“I’m just saying we would know what to do with ourselves if we went on a date.” “But that’s… what we always do anyway.” “Yeah, Davis… That’s kind of my point.” “…Oh.”

I have been writing fic since 2010 and yet I am not impervious to the effects of a good "...oh" moment haha. Plus I love what these few lines convey in terms of how they're already practically dating and the only thing between a friendship turning into more is an 'oh' moment.

From chapter 1 of "Moonshot"

He heard a window rolling down, heard Brandon shout “See you tomorrow!” Alec didn’t pause, didn’t look back. Dug keys from his pocket and unlocked his door frantically. Because he felt tears welling in his eyes and he refused to let Brandon see them, to know how badly Alec was hurting. He slammed the door closed, locked it, let his back slide down it until he sat on the floor. Alec gripped his hair, pulled too hard, blinked a few tears free. Wondered how he could be so foolish to fall for someone that didn’t even want him back.

I have such a love/hate relationship with angst. It just hurts so good sometimes. I think these lines are a good depiction of what acute grief/depression can be like. The rush to get away from anyone seeing you break down. The way it can give you tunnel vision and make things disjointed as you do necessary physical tasks on autopilot while your emotions crumble apart.

And lastly, from "Coming Home"

He was derailed when he felt something slip away from the folded jersey fabric and tumble onto the box lining below. Daulton moved the jersey aside and felt his heart stutter to a stop when he saw the ring.

These are some of my favourite lines for a few reasons. This was the last story in what ended up being a 7-part series stemming from the inception of my baseball obsession. I feel the way this ended things really provided a satisfying wrap up. I also could visualize this happening, and it was my anchor point, for ages before I finally got to write and post this scene.

🎶 do you write with music? does the music you’re listening to influence your writing?

Music influences my writing so much that sometimes I need to not listen to music. In particular, when writing dialogue I often don't listen to music at all or only listen to instrumental music. Otherwise, the words I'm trying to write and the words/lyrics I'm hearing end up in a terrible jumble in my brain.

I also try to be strategic about the music I listen to when writing. When writing fic for movies years ago, I'd often listen to the soundtrack for the relevant movie. With baseball, that doesn't exist. If I can find music that matches the vibe I'm trying to capture, I'll listen to it.

🤔 why do you write fic?

When I was younger, I think I started writing fic for two reasons. First, it allowed me to explore worlds and characters I hadn't gotten enough of from canon media. Second, it offered an escape when things were less good in my life.

I don't feel fic is a needed escape the way it used to be, though I do still rely on 'fix it fics' in that regard. Otherwise, I think fic is my outlet for exploring ideas, emotions, and circumstances that either align with or differ from my own life. Fic also has and will always be my contribution and way of connecting with other creative individuals in the world.

[starshine-hockey-girl]

Okay so I may feel some special way about this chapter because of the Seguin content. I hope that I was able to provide some inspiration.

I love that you describe the action of the games and the accuracy of what you write. It's something that I try to incorporate into my stories and I appreciate it so much when other writers do it as well.

We need to trade sources.

“You’re new.” The way that one phrase conveyed so much with two words.

“And you’re lost,”- the animosity was unexpected

For the visual reference....

"now he was looking to cause trouble and it had led him to you" - I wonder what trouble he had in mind, especially since he was hoping to find Ella

“The last girl, Ella, she was much more welcoming…”- oof, the thin line between charming and swarmy- you danced it perfectly

Ella. The slip of the woman’s name from his lips and repeated, echoed, haunted each of your thoughts as they raced through your mind. Not once before had you heard this time, and yet it made your skin crawl.- Is it really RW's first time hearing the name? I hope that she explores Ella more. My mind is racing with scenarios!

Look, you know that I am Seggy girl but he is giving off creepy vibes here which makes me a little sad.

I understand the immediate animosity from Schenn given the bad blood between the two teams.

The way that the taxi squad felt the need to inform the captain of an intruder into their space- hmmmm, interesting.

The idea that Seguin speaking/flirting with their RW lighting a fire under the bench is humorous. I forget that for the most part they are overgrown children who do not want to share their playthings

Also as a Seggy girl, I was heartbroken that she gave the piece of paper to Schenn. I mean, I get it and it is the best thing for the story but..... Okay, I am over it.

No scheduled appointments- yeah for night off!

The entire conversation between Tony and RW was heart wrenching

I will forever be in awe of how you write smut-period, end of story

"Can I sleep here tonight?" - oh the sweetness and the angst

Ross being at door was a suprise- not a good one

I love that his initial response was to not do it

Fuck Stamkos- fuck him and his stupid appointment

"Treat her right" - I can't tell you who I am more disappointed in Tony or Ross

Again Fuck Stamkos

Am I the only one who thought about the logisitics of how Stamkos was going to get confirmation? Is like his room next to Colton's? Was he going to go outside and listen? Get a fucking life dude

I did also think that they could fake it. Turn on some porn or something

Now I am disappointed in both of them

Grrrr.... all of the FEELS

;; Treat You Right Chapter Fifteen of the Road Wife Series

Table of Contents 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 11  | 12  |  13  | 14 | 15

Summary: The Tampa Bay Lighting take a quick single-game road trip to Dallas, and with your empty calendar you're finally able to address what happened between you and Tony. NOTE: Surprises bitches (I say endearingly)! I'm dropping this early. The boys need all the support I can give them today. So this will just have to do. Kinks & TW: sex work, dry humping, hickeys/marking, vaginal fingering, unprotected sex, creampie, went pretty vanilla with this one, more feelings than we are used to. Word Count: 7700+

TAGLIST: @equallyshaw , @charles11700 , @starshine-hockey-girl , @swissboyhisch , @wingedwheelprxncess , @luvmmarner , @fandomrejects

The team remained in Tampa for only a brief time after their longest road trip of the season. They were granted five days at home, just long enough to play Nashville in a short series of two games where each team was left with a single win. Then the team took the skies again, arriving in Dallas for a single game. They had arrived mid-day after a brief 2-hour flight. The single-game road trip had almost been enough to have you staying behind in Tampa as the team had planned to fly home after the game, but when the team was forced to book rooms for the night at a Dallas hotel that had started to feel more like home than your own appointment you had packed your bags and met the team on the tarmac. 

With the late landing giving you only a few hours before the game, your calendar was clear. Not a single appointment was on your calendar for the duration of the trip, and while it left you feeling they had wasted a seat on the plane on you, your company was always welcome. Especially as it came to be game time and you retired to the suite that looked over the rink. It was a box reserved for the Lightning organization, with enough seats for their social media team as well as the players that were scratched for the night. It wasn’t very often you enjoyed the company of the players during game time, the demands of keeping up appearances often consumed you. So you welcomed the opportunity to get to know those who were scratched or occupied the taxi squad. That night, Volcov, Alex Barre-Boulet, Gemel Smith, Luke Schenn, Andreas Borgman, Ben Thomas, and Chris Gibson occupied the suite. You sat among them with your laptop open on the table, casually working as the game played out below. 

The first period was a quiet one. With the expedition of a single goal at 3:55 scored by Brayden Point, his 11th of the season was assisted by Palat and Cirelli. Not even a single penalty was called. It may have been one of the quickest periods of hockey you had watched. 

The game really came to life in the second period as it was kicked off with an interference call against Palat. The Bolts were successful in the penalty kill, and minutes later the Stars themselves took a penalty for delay of game as they sent the puck over the glass. The Bolts were unsuccessful in their power play as well. It wasn’t long before the Stars tied the game with a goal of their own. A power-play goal was scored by Miro Heiskanan after Cal Foote had hooked Alexander Rudulov. It looked as if the game may go into the second intermission 1-1, but before the period could come to an end Mathieu Joseph had given the Bolts a 2-1 with assists from Maroon and Colton. 

It left morale high and the taxi squad boys rowdy as they stood up from their seats to indulge themselves in refreshments and conversation - but they could only be entertained by themselves for so long. 

Feeling an arm drape over the back of your chair you looked away from your computer screen and up to the player that was casually demanding your attention with the careful graze of his large hand against your back. You were greeted with the sweet smirk of Luke Schenn as his thumb traced circles around your back absentmindedly, “We’re going to head down to the locker room for the intermission, check in on the boys, hype them up for the third. Did you want to come?”

“You guys go on ahead, I’ve got to wrap some things up,” you assured him with a smile of your own. 

“You work too hard,” he punctuated the sentence with your name, his hand stroking over the breadth of a single shoulder before giving it a gentle squeeze, “we won’t be long.”

“I’ll be here,” you assured him and watched as the boys left, leaving you alone in the box suite. For a short time, you let yourself become enthralled by your screen. You made quick work of your task before you closed the laptop and tucked it away in its bag. Now, you could really enjoy the rest of your night. You abandoned the barstool-like chair that had been set at one of the cocktail tables and indulged in the mini bar and snacks that were left in the suite. You knew you really shouldn’t have, but you couldn’t let it go to waste. With refreshments in hand, you found a more comfortable seat along the edge of the suite. The comfort was welcome as you nearly melted into your seat. Your head leaned back against the seat, your eyes falling shut as you took in a heavy relaxed breath and took in the sounds that were as close as you were going to get to silence: the chatter of the fans in attendance and the entertainment played up on the jumbotron. And while it was loud, one thing was louder: the voice of a stranger. 

“You’re new.”

Their words left you lurching in your seat, your drink spilling over your lap as you dropped it to reach for the armrest. Your heart thundered in your chest as you tried to recover your drink, putting it aside before you turned towards the source of the sound. In the doorway of the suite was none other than Tyler Seguin. 

“And you’re lost,” you quipped from your seat and made no effort to make any formal introductions with your unexpected visitor.

Seguin had been on the Stars Injured Reserve list since the end of the 2020-2021 season having torn the labrum in his hip sometime during the playoff run - the playoffs that had the Bolts hoisting the cup for the first time since 2004. While Seguin had been very much out of the spotlight during his recovery, it didn’t seem to stop him from being there for his team off the ice. He stood in the doorway dressed in a burgundy suit that left you feeling underdressed even though you too were dressed in business attire. Your eyes were drawn to it, and how his blazar opened as she reached a hand up to brace himself against the top of the door frame. It left you to admire how his tie had become loose as the night had gone on, and his shirt was loose fitting as he had come to unbutton the one button that would have left it tight across his chest and his tie hung loose and lazily over his chest.

Tyler wasn’t dressed for business, that portion of his night had ended, and now he was looking to cause trouble and it had led him to you - but something told you that it wasn’t you that he had been looking for. 

“I have to say, not many people complain when I walk into a room,” Tyler was charming and witty as he left the doorway and made his way into the suite. He grazed over the refreshments, picking up a sweet snack for himself on his way to the row of seats you occupied, more specifically the seat right beside you. “The last girl, Ella, she was much more welcoming…”

Ella. The slip of the woman’s name from his lips and repeated, echoed, haunted each of your thoughts as they raced through your mind. Not once before had you heard this time, and yet it made your skin crawl. Your mind spirals further when you let yourself really hear what Seguin had just said. The last girl. When you joined the media team, you had been filling a void, one that had been vacated at the end of the 2018-2019 season. Surely, Seguin was referring to the young woman who once worked for the media team - but one thought did not leave you: Had Ella been the first wife? 

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, your heart pounding in your chest so hard you could hear it up into your ears as you reached down to grip the armrest tightly. Against your fingers, you could feel the warmth of Seguin’s body as he made himself comfortable. He spread his legs so that he could slouch casually as if he had sat beside you many times before, and he went as far as to have his knee come to rest against your own. You shifted away at the touch, but it only left him smiling - and that smile only seemed to grow as he leaned closer to you as if he had something to say, but you didn’t let him speak, not yet. 

“Don’t you have someone else you can entertain?” you bit out, and you felt the warmth of his laughter against your cheek. 

“Just doing my rounds, it’s good publicity-”

“It’s good publicity to bother the visitor’s media team?” You challenged him, letting your gaze meet his for the first time since he had sat down. His features were uncomfortably close. Every breath that escaped him could be felt on your face, and you could see every detail of his face from the warmth of his eyes to the quirk of his smile that told you that this man was more trouble than you could allow. Seguin was easily one of the most sought-after men in the NHL, and you had his undelivered attention. It made you uncomfortable in all the best ways, and you hated it - and what you hated more was the fact that any other woman would have killed to be in your position. 

“No this, this was just the last spot on my stop. A courtesy stop really, because it’s usually a group of boring men in here taking notes, wanting to ask too many questions - but the Bolts,” his low laughter punctuated his sentence as he dropped his voice into a low, alluring whisper, “they like to keep an attractive staff… I must say, you’re ever more pretty than the last one - though, she was a lot more fun.”

You held your breath as you felt Seguin's warmth encroach on you, his fit frame leaning in slightly over the armrest that divided you. Then came the touch of his hand on the collar of your shirt, tugging it away just enough for his thick fingers to drag over the sensitive mark on your neck that had been left there by Brayden during your flight to Detroit on the last road trip. 

“Though, they seem to be having their fun with you…” his words sent a shiver down your spine as your suspicions seemed to be all but confirmed. Whoever Ella was, wife or not, Seguin had taken a liking to her. She was the reason he was in this booth, with his suit relaxed and oozing with charm. If it had been another time, another place, it might have worked on you - but you were loyal to the team, and part of the team was walking right back through the suite door. 

“You seem to be lost, Seguin,” came Luke’s voice after the shuffling of footsteps. 

It drew your eyes back to the taxi squad, the sight of them bringing you a moment of relief. You’d never been happier to see them and it brought a smile to your features. As you smiled, Tyler laughed. He was far from intimidated by the likes of them, and instead of retreating he was leaning in to whisper in your ear to confirm all of your suspicions. “If you find that you’re up for a little fun after you take care of your boys tonight, give me a call.” 

Your smile faded as you felt his hand graze up against yours, his hot touch lingering for but a moment as he handed off a slip of paper to you. You didn’t need to look at it to know that his number was written across it. You balled it up in your fist, your gaze hardening as he stood up from his seat, satisfied. His message had been delivered, and with his unwanted audience, it was time for him to leave. 

“Enjoy the rest of the game boys,” Tyler gave them a cocky wave on his way out the door, but the boys paid no mind to him. 

The taxi squad had already turned all their attention to Luke, who lingered the closest to the doorway to make sure Seguin didn’t try to linger. He went as far as to look out into the hallway before looking back at his teammates, the clock that counted down the intermission, and at you before he was calling the shots.

“Volcov, Boulet - run downstairs, you’ve got a few before the period starts. Get the captain’s attention and let him know what happens,” the rush of words from his lips only fueled the feeling of urgency that bubbled in the depths of your stomach. 

It had you pushing yourself out of your seat and crossing your arms over your chest nervously. Then, you approached Luke who was turning his back on Volkov and Barre-Boulet. and turning his attention to you, “Hey,” his words were softly spoken as he reached out with both hands to take hold of your arms carefully, “you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m good,” you assured him, but your grip on the paper was growing tighter as you cast your glance downwards and spoke, “I tried to get him to leave…”

Your arms were left void of the heat of his touch as Luke reached up and took your chin between his thumb and forefinger. His gentle hold tilted your head back, his guidance forcing you to look up at him as he towered over you. Luke had never been an intimidating guy, and that didn’t change as he looked down at you with nothing but reassurance in his eyes. 

Your name slipped over his tongue as smooth as velvet then he spoke, “You didn’t do anything wrong. Someone should have been here-”

“You guys didn’t know he would be coming by, he’s on their long-term injured reserve…” As you spoke Luke traced his thumb along the angles of your chin and jaw slowly, his touch distracting as you tried to reassure him in return, “He wasn’t supposed to be here.”

“And he won’t be back,” Volkov cut in as he and Barre-Boulet returned to the suite. 

“You guys reach the captain?” Luke hummed as he let his hands fall from the smooth skin of your features. 

“He knows. The whole bench knows.”

“Good, that might just be the fire they needed to get through the game,” Luke nodded and moved to take his seat as the third period began behind him - but you didn’t let him get too far. 

“Wait-” Your hand was quick to reach out for his, your careful hold transferring the slip of paper from your hold to his, “take this, I don’t want it.” 

Luke took the slip from you, spreading out its wrinkles and its fold and taking in the sight of the numbers written in a messy scrawl. You had gripped it so tightly it threatened to rip under the stroke of his thumb, not that it would have mattered if it had as Luke was quick to dispose of it in the trash. 

“You would think the man’s run out of women in Dallas if he’s gotta come in here and try to steal our girl,” Luke tries to put you at ease with a semblance of a joke, his arm coming to drape around your shoulders to guide you back to your seat. Together you sat with the rest of the taxi squad and watched as the third period unfolded on the ice below. 

To start the period, it had been evenly matched with each team having their opportunities to get more points on the board - but the goaltenders were quick to snuff out any attempt. It was near halfway through the period when frustrations festered and the Bolts took a bench minor for too many men. It left you on the edge of your seat, your hand reaching out to squeeze Luke’s knee each time the Stars had a semblance of a scoring chance. You were put at ease when the boys pulled through and killed the penalty and later drew one from the Stars when Colton took a stick up high. It was on that power play the Bolts went up 3-1 with a goal from the Captain himself. He had heard the message back in the locker room and had sent one himself. They were determined to win. 

The efforts, however, almost seemed for not as the Stars were quick to come back in the final three minutes of the game with goals from Benn and Rudalov. The 3-3 score going into overtime left a sinking feeling in your stomach. Each passing second filled you with anxiety. The boys needed to win. Not for the standings. Not because it was a rematch of the previous year's Stanley Cup Final, but because of the message they were trying to send. 

Overtime wouldn’t be enough for the two teams that had become one of the season’s biggest rivalries, as after five minutes of play the score remained the same. The game would be sent to a shootout. 

Your anxieties only grew as you stood up from your seat and leaned up against the edge of the suite. You couldn’t just sit back and enjoy the game, not when sitting still felt impossible. You watched as the ice was cleared and the players took their seats on the bench. One by one they would take the ice, and up first, Jason Robertson. He was their rookie, and a hell of a good one too, which is why it didn’t surprise you when the puck met the back of the net almost effortlessly. With that goal, your stomach sank, your gaze flashing towards the squad in your company as they watched from their seats as Tampa sent out their first skater. 

“Ross?” You hadn’t meant to let his name slip from your lips at the sight of him down on the ice. You knew all too well that this was his first-ever shoot-out attempt with the team, and that in no way put you at ease. Cooper should have been sending out Pointer, Stamkos, or Killorn - the big guns when it came to your shoot-out, and yet Cooper was choosing to send out the rookie. No one would really know how he would make such an attempt, and with being as new to the league as he was the only players that would know his style of player were his teammates. 

You found yourself holding your breath as Ross skated in from center ice. His movements were quick, smooth, and effortless and his puck too found the back of the net. There was no containing your excitement at that moment as you shot up and let out a cheer that you were sure could be heard down on the benches as the rest of the 3,000 in attendance had been rendered to silence. 

The shootout would require three more shooters. First, the Stars sent out Pavelski whose shot would be saved. Then, the Bolts sent out Pointer whose shot would give the team the 2-1 advantage over the Stars going into who would be their final shooter. Rudalov would take the ice only to his a for his attempt to be snuffed out by Vasilevsky. 

It was a game worth celebrating, and yet as the hour drew late in the comfort of your hotel room you did not receive a single notification. It left you sprawled out across the bed, expression perplexed, as you pulled up your calendar and scrolled through the hours. Not a single appointment was scheduled, not that you could blame them. The team would be on a flight home come morning and the players returned to their wives before noon. 

Back during the lengthy 11-day road trip, that had you visiting 3 different cities, you wouldn’t have complained about getting to go to bed alone. Tonight, however, your mind threatened to spiral down the depths of the rabbit hole that was Ella, and you didn’t want to sleep alone. 

Your fingers were quick to fall on your contacts, your thumb scrolling through the players in your phone who were merely identified by their jersey number. Lips curled up into a tired smile as your thumb selected contact #71 and typed out a quick message: You still up?

The mere appearance of the ellipses as he typed was enough to have you moving for your bag that rested untouched in the armchair by the door. You didn’t need to dig through it to find what you were looking for, Cirelli’s sweatshirt had been the last thing you packed leaving it resting on top. You had been meaning to get it back to him but hadn’t yet found the opportunity - until now. Pulling it on over your head, you moved out into the hallway, and with a quick glance down at your phone you knew which room was your destination. 

You kept your head down as you moved through the hall, your strides quick and quiet as you snuck down the hall to Cirelli’s room. You didn’t have to knock when you arrived as Cirelli was waiting on the other side to ensure you weren’t waiting out in the hallway. While the two of you weren’t breaking any rules, you both acted with caution - especially since this was the first time you would be alone with him since the incident at the practice facility twenty days prior. 

It was all you could think about at the sight of him as the hotel room door was shut behind you. Its lock engaging was a mere echo in your mind as your eyes became fixated on the grasp of his hands around the handle. You thought of his hands often, an invading thought of how they felt tracing along your body, holding you, guiding you, fucking you. You hesitated in the doorway, your mind a mess as your hands balled the end of the too-long sleeves in your fists in a desperate attempt to ground yourself. Even Tony’s words were lost on you, and it was the touch of his hand against your arm that pulled you back to reality. 

“Everything okay?” Tony raised a brow, his large hand giving your tricep and careful squeeze. 

“Yeah, I’m great actually,” you smiled up at him and directed your dazed stare up at his features. You must have caught him just before bed, his hair was a mess and he stood in nothing more than a pair of loose lounge pants. “My calendar is clear, and I was hoping that maybe we could watch a movie or something like we used to…”

Tony’s touch left you, his hand raising to card through his thick curls as he glanced back towards his bed and the tv, “you get comfy, I’ll get it all set up,” he smiled in return before taking his lazy strides towards the television, “what do you want to watch?”

“I’m not picky, really,” you assured him as you crawled up the length of his bed and settled yourself among the comfort of the pillows. You left them for but a moment to place your phone face down on the bedside table, but when you returned to their comfort you snuggled down into them. Your lips came to pout slightly when their scent was still reminiscent of the detergent used by the hotel and nothing like Tony's. It was one of the downsides of only being in the hotel for a single night. 

“Then you’re getting a Netflix classic,” he smirked, putting on one of the platform's most popular comedy series. You were sure Tony had probably seen each of their episodes many times, but it would be the perfect background noise. 

The bed shifted as Tony climbed into his spot beside you, and the two of you were quick to fall into old habits. His arm wrapped around you without a thought, its strength drawing you closer as the familiar jingle of the show filled the room. You could feel his thumb stroking over its familiar path along the length of your arm that was concealed by his sweater and as you snuggled a little bit closer you could feel his every breath. The warmth of his body in turn warmed you, and soon you found yourself snuggling in just a little bit closer - your hand was on his chest and you draped a single leg over his. His body was a familiar comfort, one that you hadn’t realized you had missed until he was consuming every single one of your senses but your tongue - and you were ready to change that. Leaning your head back you smiled up at Tony who was quick to meet your gaze. This wasn’t the same look you had given him all those nights ago in Nashville. There was no nervousness, no shame, and no reason for him to think he wasn’t allowed to kiss you. Yet, Tony hesitated. 

Raising his hand, Tony stroked over the smoke skiing off your cheek, his head shaking slowly from side to side as he let out a heavy breath that became your name on his lips. It sent a sinking feeling deep in your stomach, one that had you pulling away from his hold and pushing up to kneel in front of him on the bed. 

“What’s wrong, Tony?”

Your mouth went dry with worry, your hands slipping into the sleeves of his sweater that you wore just enough to grip at the fabric. It was a simple act to try to keep your mind from racing as your studied Tony’s features - but it was failing. You couldn’t stop your thoughts from sliding into worry. Had Tony decided that having any kind of relationship with you was too much? 

“I want to talk to you about what happened,” his words were heavy, and you didn’t need an explanation to know what exactly he was speaking to. While you have that conversation in the hallway back in Chicago, Tony wanted to talk about your fight and the events that led to the two of you being caught by Cooper. 

“There’s nothing to talk about-” You tried to shrug it off, but Tony was insistent.

“Don’t say that,” he sighed, his hand coming up to rake through his dark curls, “I’m not proud of what I did that day, and I need you to know that. I shouldn’t have done what I did that day - should have said what I said. I don’t want to sit here and make excuses but it’s fucking hard to sit back and watch this all happen. Watching you run off to your appointments with the rest of the time, and then there’s you and Ross-” Tony looked away when he said his teammate's name, a heavy breath shaking through his body as if it left a foul taste in his mouth. 

“I know this isn’t the most ideal situation to be in,” you sighed, a hand reaching out for his carefully before giving it a reassuring squeeze, “and I wish that it didn’t have to be this way, and I understand if you don’t want to do this anymore-”

“No, no,” he spoke quickly yet softly, “that’s not- fuck that. I tried being distant after what we did and it didn’t make it any easier. I still had to sit back and watch it all happen, but worst of all I had to watch as you did everything we did together with someone else.” His head lulled forward, his dark curls falling into his eyes as he gripped your hand a little tighter, “I’m glad you’re here tonight, and I really am sorry for what I did. It wasn’t right-”

“Then make it right, Tony,” you told him firmly, and for a moment there was only silence that hung between you as his warm gaze raised to meet your own. 

It was a silence that left you biting your lip as you leaned in a little closer to him, his hand coming back up to rest on your cheek as he moved away from the support of the headboard. His hand guided you in a little closer, and he was meeting you halfway as his lips came down on yours as if it were the first time back in Nashville again. It was a feather-light kiss, his lips dragging over yours slowly and coaxing a gasp from your lips. The kiss had been gentle, but it was only the beginning. The moment you reciprocated the kiss, Tony’s hands found your hips and pulled you into his lap. 

You straddled him, your hands seeking out anything to clutch onto. Fingertips dragged over the muscles of his chest, and up over his shoulders. You didn’t stop until your fingers were knitted in the thick strands of his curls, tugging his neck back just enough to coax him into parting his lips further to allow you to taste his tongue. That alone was not enough to satisfy you, but instead only left you craving more of him. You didn’t have to tell Tony that, not with your words anyway. He could feel it in the motions of your body as you stroked down the back of his neck with the tips of your fingers, and how your lips began to roll in a slow rhythm against his thighs. With each rotation of your hips, the friction between your clothed core and his thigh sent a shockwave of pleasure through your body, but it wouldn’t be enough to leave you satisfied. 

Tony’s grip tightened on your hips, his fingers dragging in as he drew your hips forward so you rested higher on his lap - and it was there you could feel him between your legs. Stiff and ready for you, yet Tony didn’t rush things. He guided you over him slowly, the eagerness of his cock pressing up into you as he kissed you deeply, slowly, without haste. Tony had a hunger for you, but he was going to enjoy you like a satisfying meal instead of a late-night binge that would only leave you with an insatiable hunger for more. 

When your body had fallen into the rhythm set out by his guidance, Tony’s hands began to wander. His touch moved over your waist, wrinkling his sweater as he pushed it up. The friction between the fabrics had your shirt peeling off with it as you listed your hands up and pulled back from his lips just enough for Tony to remove the layers from your body. The rush of your fabric over your ears was almost enough to disorient you as your head was already spinning with pleasure, and it left you whining as Tony’s lips failed to return to yours. With your skin exposed to him now, Tony wanted to explore it. 

His mouth was on your neck when his strong-armed wrapped around you, hoisting you up from his lap to lay you out on the bed. Tony moved with you, his lips never once leaving your skin. He placed slow and sloppy open-mouthed kisses along the angle of your neck, leaving a hot trail of saliva to be cooled by the air as his mouth made its descent. Down your body his mouth travelled, his lips embracing your body with his careful kiss. They had first graced your collarbone, following its subtle angle down to the swell of your breast. He lingered there, focusing on one and then the other to assure he would leave his mark before kissing down between their valley and over the gore of your bra. From there he peppered kisses down the length of your stomach and only stopped when he hit the waistline of your pants. 

It was there he hesitated, leaning his head back just enough to look up at you through the curls that had fallen down into his face - silently asking you for permission to continue on the off chance that you wanted him to stop. You nodded quickly in response, your own hands going to your pants to push them from your body as Tony made quick work of his own clothes. They were tossed into a heap on the floor with your own, before he was back in the bed and finding his place between your thighs. Tony braced himself over you, his hand pressing firm into the mattress beside your head as he reached the other down between your legs. Two fingers brushed over your clit, a teasing graze that left your hips wiggling, before they traced over your entryway that was slick with your need for him. You watched as his jaw slacked at just how effortlessly he was able to slide two fingers into your core with your arousal, a ghost of a moan on his lips as he coaxed one from your own lips. 

Each plunge of his fingers inside your cunt was enough to leave you reeling, your teeth coming down to bite at your lower lip until it throbbed. You needed to be quiet. Your calendar was empty, and if anyone overheard you, there would be far too many questions to answer - but it was quickly becoming too much to contain. With both hands you reached up, your careful touch meeting his face as you guided him back down to your lips. As they met in a slow, opened-mouth kiss, you used it to muffle the moan that had so desperately wanted to escape. 

“Tony,” you muttered his name softly against his lips before your words became a begging plea, “Tony, please. I want to come around your cock, not your fingers-” 

Tony shuttered between your legs at your words, and he released a heavy breath that washed over your face in a blossom of heat. His lips were left to merely graze yours as he ease your fingers from your core. You held his gaze as you felt him working between your legs to grasp at his cock and soon he was dragging the head of his cock up and down the slick arousal of your cunt. He guided it up and down, then up and down again before he was guiding his cock inside you with his hand and the careful pressure of his hips. His fingers had primed you, and yet his cock continued to spread your walls with his careful thrust. Tony had thrust into you abruptly like he had the first time he had fucked you. No, this time he was gentle as he guided his cock in merely halfway. It was then he began his careful thrusts, easing himself in another inch at a time as your core allowed. 

Soon, Tony had fallen into a steady rhythm, his thrust slow and firm as he plunged into your core until he was balls deep. He took his time with you, his thrusts not hesitant but meticulous as were the rest of his caresses and kisses as he fucked you. Tony refused to lose control, to fall into the brash emotion of jealousy that had consumed him all those days ago when he had taken you for the first time. The graze of his touch, and strokes of his tongue each one of them had been selfless as he was driving to the brink of pleasure. This was how he wanted to fuck you for the first time, so sweet and tenderly, and he wasn’t going to stop until you were quivering around his cock. 

Careful hands guided your legs up from the bed and let them wrap around his hips with ease. A low moan quaked through your body as he was able to ease in a little deeper now, and it left you digging your heels into his lower back. Your hips rolled to meet his every thrust and your head lulled back almost dreamily into the mattress that the pleasures of his cock began to consume you - but it wasn’t until you watched his own expression begin to falter. Tony’s blinks became long, and his breathing a little more laboured as his own climax began to wash over him - and you could feel him trying to resist. His thrusts became inconsistent and shallow and his eyes shut tight as he did all he could to fight it, but the touch of your hand against his cheek was quick to coax his eyes back open. 

He stared down at you with an almost dazed look, his expression soft as the pressure of your heels guided him back inside you fully. “Don’t hold back, Tony,” you muttered, “I don’t have to be first,” your words were a reassuring breath as you flexed your core around him. 

While your words softened his face once more, you could still feel the hesitation in each thrust. “Tony, I’m so close,” you did your best to encourage him, and your words weren’t untruthful. His every touch was bringing you closer and closer, your core on the very edge of your climax but it was craving one thing; “I want to feel it - I want to feel you come, Tony. Fill me up Tony, I’m yours-”

Your words were broken by a moan as Tony gripped your hips and thrust into you quickly. His pace hastened and he thrust in deeper than he had all night and he didn’t slow, not even as his cock began to twitch with pleasure and flooded your core with his cum. You could feel it as it consumed your core in waves, and oozed down along his cock as he fucked his own cum from you. It was the final push you needed to be thrown over the edge. Your legs began to tremble, your ankles locking to keep your legs from slipping down from his hips. Your body was consumed by your every uneven breath as you threw your head back into the mattress and your walls throbbed with pleasure around his cock, desperate to keep every bit of him inside you. 

It was a pleasure that left you both smiling, Tony coming down to place playful kisses along your lips as you both plummeted from the highs of pleasure. It coaxed soft laughter from your lips as he eased himself from you, and came to lay beside you on the bed, the kisses never seizing but instead travelling over your cheeks and neck. It was only when Tony became consumed by the scent of you that he buried his face in your neck and let himself relish in it. You welcomed the feeling of his hot breath as it washed over your skin, the warmth aiding in bringing you calm and the threat of sleep was rapidly approaching. 

Your head lulled into his carefully, your cheek resting against his soft curls as you took in a deep breath of your own. You wanted to fall asleep like that, with his body intertwined with yours - “Tony,” you hummed out, “can I sleep here tonight?”

Drawing back, Tony looked down at you with a soft expression, “of course you can.”

His hand came up to stroke your cheek slowly, and it felt as if it were just you and Tony in the world - and that you didn’t have 21 other men who needed your love and affection - and you intended to take advantage of every moment of it. 

“I’m just gonna get cleaned up, and we should get some sleep, we have a flight early in the morning,” you told him softly as you pulled away from him, and your body protested the cold of the room in an instant. You wanted his touch, his warmth. 

Sitting on the edge of the bed, you reached over and picked up his sweater from the floor. It didn’t quite smell like him anymore, but it would keep you warm enough until you could crawl back into his bed. “I’ll just be a minute,” you assured and disappeared into the bathroom. 

You let the water run and you used the bathroom, letting the temperature of the water reach what you liked before you washed your hands and splashed your face. It was a desperate attempt at your nightly routine that you had left behind in your room - but this would be sufficient enough, especially when you had Tony and sleep waiting for you - but when you returned to the main room Tony was not in the bed. 

Brow furrowed as you looked from the bed to the tv screen that had gone black and finally to the bedroom door Tony stood dressed in his lounge pants and his back to you. You hadn’t heard a knock on the door, and you had half the mind to retreat back into the bedroom to hopefully go unseen but that idea was completely abandoned when Tony turned back to look at you, giving you a complete view of the player that stood beyond the door in the hallway: Ross. 

He stood there almost awkwardly, his face absent of the smile that would send butterflies into your stomach. Instead, he wore a look of concern and in his hands, he held his phone the screen bright for Tony to see. 

“What is going on?” you bit out in a harsh whisper as you moved into the main room and towards the door with little regard for the fact that you weren’t wearing any pants and that the remnants of Tony had begun to drip down the inside of your thighs. 

You moved straight for the doorway, Tony moving out of your way as you reached out to take Ross by the arm. You tugged Ross into the privacy of the hotel room, assuring that the door closed firmly behind him. It was only then you reached for the phone, the screen almost blinding against your tired eyes. In big bold letters it had become clear as to why he had come looking for you, he had an appointment. 

“Ross, this isn’t funny,” you sighed as you let your thumb drag down over the details of the appointment. He hadn’t made it from himself, why would he? He had no wife or girlfriend waiting for him back home, he didn’t need anyone’s permission to spend a night with you. No, this appointment was made only minutes ago on the captain's orders. 

“I didn’t even know you were here,” Ross admitted, his words soft almost apologetic as he looked between you and Tony, “I was here to-”

“Ask for my permission?” Cirelli cut in, his voice pushing the edge of hostility. 

“To tell you I wasn’t going to go through with it,” Ross clarified. 

Tony shook his head slowly, a low laugh erupting from his throat as he leaned up against the wall to put some distance between him and Ross. “You don’t get it, do you? This isn’t about you, if you don’t do this-” He cut himself off as he raised a hand to run over his jaw, he didn’t like what he was about to say. 

“What are you trying to say, Tony?” You pressed gently. 

“You need to keep your appointment with Ross, and the captain needs to hear it.”

“Cirelli-” Ross started to protest, but you cut him off with your own. 

“He’s right, Ross. The two of you have been at odds since the moment you got here because of me. You’re part of this team, and you don’t seem to be going anywhere. He needs to know that the two of you are willing to put everything behind you, and the only way he’s going to be able to see that is for this to happen.”

Your words hung heavily in the air as you moved from the doorway to the heap of clothes on the floor. You sorted through them quickly, pulling on your panties and your bottoms before grabbing your phone from the bedside table. Standing there, you looked down at your phone as you held it in your hands, your eyes fixated on the calendar notification that was meant to inform you of your appointment with Ross. Taking a steady breath, you found your composure and returned to the doorway where Ross waited almost anxiously. 

He offered you a crooked smile as you returned to him, but his eyes were quick to return to Tony, “Are you sure? I don’t need to do this man-”

“I’m sure,” it was only with Tony’s assurance that a spark of excitement returned to Ross’ features, his lips quirking up at the corners. He wanted you, but he had been trying to put his teammate first. It almost brought Tony’ to laughter once more, his head shaking slowly, “you could at least try to hide the fact that you’re not disappointed.”

Ross could only manage a soft chuckle in response, his hand raising to rub modestly over the back of his neck. He could only play coy for so long. 

“You are trouble, Ross Colton,” you told him firmly, tossing your phone at him before you turned to Tony and took him in your arms. You held him tight, your face resting against his chest as he craned to place a sweet kiss on the top of your head, “good night, Tony.”

“Good night,” he sighed your name into your hair before he let you go, his own hand reaching out to get the door for you and Ross. He watched as you both moved out into the hallway, but you had only made it a few steps before he was calling out after his teammate. The pair held a long glance, Tony’s softened expression meeting Colton’s which had grown bright at the prospect of getting to spend his night with you. Tony’s words were heavy and strained as he spoke out one last time before he could let you both go, “Colton, you treat her right.”

[cuntycassandra]

🌹

One line from a wip:

- Blaine to Sebastian, concerning Kurt.

“He doesn’t love you, you know, not the way he loves me. I’ve filled his library, whereas you’re just a passing sentence.”

[lazypanartist]

It's Okay

Leonardo x Reader

Rise movie caused me emotional damage 🥲 So I'm writing this for me, because I need it

Warnings: MOVIE SPOILERS, Angst/comfort, depiction of injuries

Some of this is from the movie script itself!

Word Count: ~1000

-----

Everything hurts

You groaned quietly, trying to reach up, rub your eyes.

You couldn't move your arm.

Where am I?

Eyes snapping open, you tried looking down. You could feel something hard against your back, something holding your arms to your sides-

Metal..?

Yes, metal restraints of some form. You could hear voices approaching rapidly, someone muffledly saying "They're awake- yes, I know I'm not in there, Leon, their blood pressure just spiked-"

Leon..?

Leo!

It was as if the previous day's happenings all rushed back into your mind at once. The Kraang invasion, pink goop and tendrils covering much of the city, your friends all getting hurt..

The last thing you could hear was.. some sort of goodbye message from Leo.

Self-sacrifice.

---

Leo's voice rang over the communicator beside your leg. "Casey, it's the only way. He's too strong. He's not gonna stay on the other side unless I keep him there."

"There has to be another way!"

The vagabond from the future sounded desperate. Uneasy. His voice cracked with what you assumed to be the effort it took to not cry.

"We tried everything, Cass. This is the only way."

You laid on the ground, several injuries scattered along your torso. You weren't a fighter by any means, but.. you couldn't just let them go without you. Besides, the lair was covered in Kraang goop.. unfortunately, most of the rest of the city was under their control as well. Most of your injuries had been accidental, but-

There was one gash, just below your ribs. Sister had thrown a large chunk of rubble at you. It was rather impressive, the size of the injury compared to the weapon.

"Leo, please don't do this! Leo!"

Raph's voice matched Casey's. Desperate. You felt a tear drip down your cheek at whatever the ex-leader was trying to convey to his little brother... What was he even doing?

Leo chuckled, but you could feel the sadness in his voice. "You're one to talk, big bro. Hero moves are totally your style."

Kraang laughed, barely audible through the comm at first. It sounded like he was getting closer, his voice fluctuating with the fighting that must have been occuring on the other side of the line. "Outmatched and alone, yet you persist. For what? Honor, redemption? Sacrifice? All meaningless."

"We'll see about that."

Casey's voice rang out through the comm. "Leo, please! I can't lose you again."

"Hey, future me would be real proud of you. I'm proud of you."

The line went dead. Even in your injured state, you could feel.. something besides pain. Dread.

You felt another tear drip down your cheek as darkness began creeping into your vision.

Losing him..

No...

I can't.. he can't do this...

And everything faded to black.

-----

"There we go, see! They're okay, Leo."

You blinked harshly, bright light filling your vision

"Pupils are normal, and their pulse is slowing down.. (Y/n), can you hear me?"

"Yeah.."

You mumbled weakly, turning your head to try and escape the lights. Luckily Donnie took pity on you, retracting the light back into his battle shell.

"Good.. your condition is stabilizing, that's good.. hey, you okay?"

You shook your head, tears falling down your face. He quickly undid the fastenings around your wrists and waist, helping you into a sitting position upon your request. Hissing, you pressed a hand against the wound on your torso.

"..Sister got you pretty badly. It'll most likely leave a scar, but the internal damage is minimal.

"..Okay."

The purple-clad turtle sighed, glancing towards the closed door of the lab.

"...You're worried about Leo."

Your head snapped up, tears still streaking down your face. Eyes widening, you followed Donatello's gaze to the door.

"Is he-"

"He's fine." He chuckled, though the faux-happy sound was short-lived. "Mikey's magic hands brought him back.. from the prison dimension. A few cuts and bruises, but nowhere near as bad off as you."

"..Can he.. come in? Please?"

Donnie nodded.

"That was the plan.. just wanted to make sure you were okay, first. Y'know, make sure he wouldn't further injury my patient."

"Thanks, Don."

He smiled towards you, walking towards the door.

"Of course."

Almost as soon as the door was opened Leo was in the doorway, practically blocking his twin from leaving the lab. He gasped, eyes widening when they met yours.

"(Y/n)!"

Your name was barely a gasp falling from his lips, rushed as he bolted to your side. Tentatively, he sat on the edge of the makeshift hospital bed, offering a hand to you.

"(Y/n).."

You cut him off, eyes welling with more tears

"I thought you were dying.. the- the last thing I heard was you telling Casey that you were proud, and then-"

You choked, tucking your head into his chest as you struggled to both cry and breathe.

"-then you were gone, Leo. We could've lost you! I could have lost you!"

His free hand smoothed along your spine. He scooted closer, pulling you onto his lap as you cried against his collarbone.

"I know, (Y/n).. I'm sorry. It's all I thought I could do... I thought that if I did that, then the rest of you would be safe.. now look at us."

He chuckled, hand falling to rest against your wound. You could feel his lips above your ear, pressing a gentle kiss as he held you.

Sighing, he settled the hand on your hip, the other pressing you closer by your spine.

"It's okay.. let it all out."

You shook your head, hiding your head in the crook of his neck, as if the action would hide your tears from the body they landed upon.

"It's okay. We're both here, see?" He began rocking you lightly, careful of your wounds.

"There we go.." He was whispering now, mouth still resting against your temple as he cradled you.

He chuckled again, settling his shell against the wall as he held you closer.

"See..? We're okay. We're going to be okay."

It wasn't hard to believe him.

You could feel yourself drifting back to sleep against his plastron, sniffling quietly as Leo continued mumbling words of comfort into your hairline.

"It's okay."