#but yea now that *that* character is gone it's just like.. what's the point of continuing the game

[motherlvr]

hi:D can you do miles!42 with a reader who doesn't really like getting told "watch who ur talking to" or smth bc most fics abt miles!42 is like that and nooo i won't ever let a man say that to me😭 and they like, know how to defend themself so they're pretty independent if thats alr ofc!

ngl i loved writing this, tysm for the req!

wc: 2.1k

pairing: E-42 Miles Morales x Strong, Independent! f! reader

warnings: enemies to lovers, kind of rivalry tbh, cursing, Miles is mean in this one, but gets character development, reader knows how to fight, baddie ong, reader doesn't take miles' bs

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"You gotta be shitting me." Mumbling under your breath, your eye involuntarily twitched. You glared at Miles like it was his fault for putting you in this situation.

Your glare was reciprocated as he said, "I ain't happy about it either, princesa." You hated when he called you that. It rolled off his tongue with such distaste. "Yeah? Glad we got that in common then." You snipped, irritated.

Miles Gonzalo Morales was a dick. To put it kindly.

He was a stuck-up, close-minded dick. It's like his sole purpose in life was to irk you. The two of you have never been on good terms. He tested your patience every waking moment.

But unfortunately for both of you, your Spanish teacher paired you up as partners for a major project. It would count for a good portion of your grade, so not doing it wasn't an option for you. You had less than two weeks to finish the project, and you weren't going to waste it.

You'd much prefer to do the project alone. One thing you've learned is: if you want something done correctly, do it yourself. And to never put it solely in the hands of a man. But the project was a requirement for the class, so you had no place to argue about it.

Thankfully, today was just a planning day. So it wouldn't be as painful, you hoped.

You showed him a plan you had thought about within only a few minutes and asked, "Thoughts?" He took a short glance at it and told you, "That's trash." A vein almost popped out of your head. You snapped, "You got any better ideas then?"

"Yea, anythin' other than that." He told you mindlessly. You had half a mind to make his braided head become real familiar with the cold surface of his desk. Around ten minutes later, he had finally come up with something. It wasn't that great, but at least he was semi-cooperative. You took one look at his plan and decided to turn the tables on him. You said, "You couldn't have come up with anything better? Shit's worse than my idea."

You could see him grip his pencil just a bit tighter, no doubt irritated by now. "Nah, watch your mouth." He told you, and you were unsure of how serious he was being. "Watch my mouth? You needa watch how when you turn around, one of your precious braids will be gone." You said as you made a snipping motion with your fingers. He protectively grabbed onto his braids, "Yo chill, ma."

As Spanish class progressed, everything only went downhill from there. He always seemed to hate every idea you had or had something to say. He groaned, "Woman, I swear. Your ideas are shit." Your former hopes of a peaceful partnership were long gone.

His choice of words alone irked you as you replied, "See, that's what you're not gonna call me. And if we're gonna be partners, you need to act decent for once. Get it together, Morales." You set clear boundaries as you pointed a finger at him. Surprisingly, he obliged. He looked like he made a revelation as he shook his head. "Nah, you right. That was outta line." The moment was oddly tranquil until he opened his mouth again. "I meant: I swear, your ideas are fucking terrible."

From that point further, the hopes of having a normal, mature, conversation were fleeting. The majority of the class was spent bickering rather than working on the task at hand.

You were one of the very few people that tested him. You gave him a challenge, while most people wouldn't utter a single complaint.

Eventually, at the end of the class, the two of you finally landed on an idea to carry out. A true miracle.

The next week in Spanish class passed and the days were cutting it closer and closer to the deadline. But there was still much work to be done. So, begrudgingly, you both had to work on it out of school. After Spanish, you were packing up your things when you asked him, "My place or yours?" His response was immediate. "My place. I'll give you my address. Come over after school, 'ight?" He said, writing down his address and handing it to you.

You accepted it and said, "Alright. Are your parents good with me coming over?" You questioned if he even had the decency to check first. Although you couldn't stand him most of the time, you didn't want to intrude on his family. He shrugged it off, "Yeah my ma's good with it. Already told her."

He wasn't about to tell you that his mother demanded the project was done at his house so she could keep a keen eye on the both of you.

You were dreading the final bell of the day. Spending more time than legally required with Miles wasn't your ideal image of fun. As the school day ended, you walked over to Miles' house.

Knocking on the door, it was soon opened by no one other than Miles' mother. She was expecting you, as a smile adorned her face. You greeted her, "¡Hola, Señora Morales! Gracias por invitarme a tu casa." (Hi, Mrs. Morales! Thank you for inviting me to your house.)

She widened her eyes at you, "¡Claro! ¿Cómo estás?" (of course, how are you?) She asked you with a sweet smile. You replied and reciprocated a smile, "Bien, ¿usted?" (good, you?) To which she responded, "Muy bien, gracias." (very good, thank you) As you put down your things, you noticed Miles was standing only a few feet away. His mother pulled Miles to the side and whispered, "She speaks Spanish, I like her." Not wanting to give away that she was a loud whisperer, you concealed a small laugh. It's a wonder how Miles turned out like that. His mother's wonderful. You knew she raised him better.

After his mother was done speaking to him, Miles led you to his room. His mother called out, "¡Deja la puerta abierta!" (leave the door open!) "Si, mami." He said back in an unusually nice tone.

You previously believed Miles Morales was a universal dick. But you soon realized you were somewhat wrong. He was a dick. To everyone except his mother, it seemed.

As you both settled down to start working on the project, you grinned at him like you had just found out a Federal-level secret. "You're such a momma's boy." You said.

His head whipped to you like you knew something you shouldn't. "No one would believe you." He said. You teased, "Oh, everyone would. Trust."

This was the most civil conversation the both of you have ever held within your whole history of knowing Miles. The afternoon was sprinkled with light-hearted jokes here and there, and it wasn't as painful as you initially believed. Needless to say, being forcibly confined in a space with Miles went much smoother than you could've ever anticipated. The project was progressing for once. And so was your relationship with Miles.

A few days later, you were in a better mood than regular. Within the past few days, Miles has been more tolerable. Maybe even likable. Apparently, you were in too good of a mood. You must've appeared too approachable today.

As you were walking in the hallways of school to your next class, a guy you didn't recognize slung an arm around your shoulders and said, "Hey, what's good jit?" You immediately pushed his arm off. He reeked of an excessive usage of cologne. You winced at his stench. "Don't call me that." You assertively said. But he only took it as a challenge. He said with a wink, "You tryna play hard to get? Alright, I'll play along."

"I'm not 'playing hard to get'," You mocked with air quotations. Dumbing it down, you continued, "I don't want you." Could a girl make it any more obvious?

Your words went straight over his oversized head. He said with a disgusting smirk, "I can change your mind." Your face visibly grimaced at his desperate attempt, "Not even baby Jesus could change my mind."

He was starting to get agitated at this point, "Nah, why you trippin', girl?" he said. You immediately retorted, "Why can't you take a damn hint?"

"C'mon, I know you want me. Gimme a chance." He said. You were sick and tired of this interaction, so you just decided to walk away. Turning your back, you tried to escape this conversation. But he grabbed your hand to prevent you from leaving. "Aye, where you goin'?"

You tried to be patient. And where did patience get you? Nowhere. In your mind, this guy was way too testosterone-deficient to be talking tough to you. There was nothing worse than a teenage boy. More importantly, a boy that didn't know what 'no' means.

And in an instant, the sound of a slap resounded throughout the hallway.

He looked like he was about to start crying. Holding his cheek in pain, he sneered, "Fuck you, bitch. You ain't shit anyway. I ain't even want you." But as you tried to walk away once again, he placed a tight grip on your shoulder to prevent you from escaping.

Miles was skipping class and wandering in the hallways when he saw you. From your body language, he could tell you were uncomfortable. His eyes glanced toward the guy's grip on your shoulder, and Miles suddenly understood the situation. He could see where this was heading. Or at least, he believed he did. Miles was about to intervene when within the blink of an eye, you had flipped the guy on his back and onto the floor.

You told the boy on the floor, "Don't try that shit again. With me or any other woman, got it?" Groaning in agony, the guy whimpered in response, and you took it as a 'yes'.

The guy was no André the Giant, but it impressed the hell out of Miles nonetheless. Since when could you do that? He questioned himself. Miles had to prevent his jaw from dropping. He was suddenly glad he never pushed you that far. You walked away unbothered as if nothing had happened. He gained a newfound respect for you. But that would have to stay unspoken.

Once Spanish class rolled around, you realized it was the second to last day you had to finish the project, so you were working extra diligently in Spanish class. You told Miles, "Alright, I finished decorating it. What do you think?" showing him the project. Not that you cared what he thought, but it would make this whole process much easier if he wouldn't shit on your every move. You've had your daily dose of asshole for the day. Almost an overdose, really.

A few moments passed by where he stared at the project, and then back to you. Fully expecting Miles to be his usual asshole self, you said, "Spit it out. What is it?" You waved your hand in front of his face. He swatted your hand away and replied, "I ain't gonna hold you, it's a pretty solid project so far."

You raised a brow at him, and suspiciously asked, "Really?" This was the first time he didn't have any retort to say. "Yeah, I think you're great, ma." He said. You cheekily grinned at him as he tried to correct himself, "I meant, great at the project. Yeah. The project." He almost stumbled on his words. He never did that. He was always collected. What was up with him? It was definitely a sudden change, but you weren't complaining.

There was only a small portion of the project left to do by the end of the class, so Miles suggested finishing it at his house.

This time after school, the both of you walked together to his house. As you worked on the project in his room, you noticed he wasn't getting much done. It seemed like he was in his head, whatever goes on in there. As you glanced up, he locked eyes with you. You hadn't a clue what he was thinking.

You originally would've preferred to do the project yourself, but if you had to have a partner, you believed the work should be divided equally. You weren't going to carry the whole project on your back.

"Why're you slacking, Miles? Our time is limited, y'know." "Ion know. Mind's elsewhere." He shrugged. It was subtle, but you noticed his glance travel to your lips. You grinned and took the opportunity to tease, "What, you want a kiss or somethin'?" You said it mainly as a joke. Sure, maybe you liked the way he gave you a challenge everyday. You wouldn't blatantly admit it, but it was refreshing to be with someone that actually cared about their work. But much to your surprise, he ran his hand over the back of his braids and said. "Shi, maybe it would motivate me. You feel me?"

Not expecting him to agree, you said, "I mean, alright. If you get off your ass, maybe I'll give you one." You tried to say as casually as you could. But you couldn't deny the fact that you were growing fond of him. You were internally conflicted as you wanted to hate him, but couldn't. In reality, it was far from hate.

Miles couldn't exactly pinpoint the moment his detest for you faded away and was replaced with something different. An emotion he rarely felt. Seeing you singlehandedly take on a guy was only fueling it for him. He quickly started working harder on his part. You mentally praised yourself. After a few silent moments, he spoke up, "Yo, I'm basically finished."

He was bullshitting, and you knew it. As you looked at his part of the project, he still had a good chunk to finish. But you caved and moved closer to him. Holding a hand to his face, you peppered a light kiss to the corner of his mouth, just barely avoiding his mouth.

As usual, he had something to say, "Don't play, mami." He resisted the urge to press his lips to yours until they were numb. You simply smiled at him and replied, "Yeah? Keep workin' and you'll earn a real one."

Immediately, Miles got right back to working on his part of the project without another complaint. You've never seen him work so studiously.

Pleased to say, with your motivation, Miles was more productive that day than all the other days combined.

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taglist! please lmk if u want to be added 🫶

@l5byrinth @iamspooderman

[irisinluv]

Mirror Yandere Brainrot

I’ve been thinking about a Yandere who can watch you through mirrors. And I don’t mean Erik from Phantom of the Opera. I mean paranormal level watching you through any surface that can hold a reflection. The shop window you catch a glimpse of your hair in, the sunglasses you use as a mirror to reapply your lipstick, the shower head that makes you giggle cuz it gives your face a fisheye effect. Whatever.

I picture the obvious- how they watch you frown and turn to look at your cellulite, practice how to stand to make your stomach appear the way you want, do a fake laugh to see if that chip in your tooth is noticeable…. All those stupid little things that we hyper focus on, that makes us upset, makes us hate our reflection, they of course, love. They wish they could take away all those insecurities. And they know exactly how they’d do it too.

But it’s not just the obvious self love arc for this mirror Yan. Oh no. Cuz, we don’t just have mirrors to reflect on how much we hate our bodies. You bet your ass your Yandere sees you recreating doctor pimple popper on your own face. Sees your shower karaoke, watches you burn your toast, stub your toe, roll down your windows and get into character as you scream sing Jesus take the wheel (bonus points if you’re not Christian btws- we’re allowed to jam to that too). They just love getting to watch all these mundane moments!

They do of course get frustrated that they can only watch you through the mirrors. But- haven’t you heard that you’re not supposed to sleep facing a mirror? That things from the other side can come out to get you? Mmmm….. yea so those 1980’s mirrored closet doors you have might be a biiiiiiit of a problem.

I think they’d just be able to access you in your dreams, at least as a start, but if they ever found a way to you for real….. whew. Whewwwww. Hello sailor! I mean mirror Yan surely can mirror your exact type. That’s. That’s kinda their whole thing isn’t it? Magic mirror shit.

Slight NSFW below cut

Once they’re out…. They would not fuck you against mirrors.

I know that’s where your brain may go at first. The typical “look at how I see you- you’re perfect!” Shit. But I’m sorry. If someone fucked me and I had to look at myself covered in sweat, hair sticking to my face, triple chins for days, stomach rolls rolling, cellulite dimpling….. IM NOT IN THE MOOD ANYMORE!

So nah. Mirror Yan won’t fuck you against a mirror. They WILL however, use their voice. They had gone unheard so long…. You had gone YEARS being unable to hear them, see them, feel them. So now that they have you in their arms, they’re going to make sure you hear, see, and feel them until there’s nothing else for you to focus on.

If we want to stick with the self love trope, an alternative to the mirror fucking thing, is them narrating what they see. Their voice is pure sin as they drive into you, sink down on you, or look up from between your thighs to describe the way your pupils look right now, all blown out. How you look like you’re praying when you cum, even though they’re the ones on their knees. They describe those things you hate about yourself too. But when they describe it, they sound reverential. They also sound horny as all hell. But most of all, they sound like the only thing keeping them alive is so they can keep seeing and feeling these parts of you.

And they make you watch them as they give you the most intense pleasure of your life. They may not make you stare into a mirror as they rail you…. But you WILL keep your eyes open so you can see exactly what you do to them. They CRAVE being seen by you. They have you play with yourself the way they’ve watched you do so many times…. Except now, your eyes are locked onto theirs as your eyebrows screw up, and it’s THEIR name you gasp out as your fingers fly. And they don’t have to just watch anymore either.

They also almost always want you facing them. They want you to look them in the eyes and know EXACTLY who is claiming you, body mind and soul. The only exception to the mirror fucking thing is if you/they want to hit it from the back. If you’re not looking in each others faces, you’re looking at each others reflection. If your eyes glass over, they’re smacking your ass to bring your attention back to them. You’re not missing a second of the absolute pleasure dripping from their face. They’re not shy about it either. Their eyebrows screwing up in ecstasy, mouth hanging loose in a perpetual moan, it’s lewd. It’s sloppy. And it’s all for you.

You see, they’re insecure over being glossed over- it was fantastic getting to watch you basically every minute of the day, but you have no idea how frustrating it is to scream out to your lover, cry and kick and wail, as you watch them breeze past a flat puddle on a sidewalk, none the wiser. So, they make sure you’re VERY present with them.

I also think they’d be a huge fan of cockwarming. Just being connected to each other as much as possible. Really needy behavior after being denied physical contact for so long. For my lovelies who cock warming doesn’t work for- you’re not off the hook. Mirror Yan will be wrapped around you just as much. Their fingers absentmindedly trailing your body, their fingers dipping into your mouth, inside you, over your hips….

OH and they love marking you. Hickeys, some sort of collar or necklace, hell, even a collarbone tattoo. They want you to look at your reflection, and see THEM. They may not be stuck on the other side of that reflection anymore, but they still get a thrill from knowing every time you look in a mirror…. It’s them you think of.

So uh. Yea. Even the mirrors are horny for y’all! Stay tuned, maybe I’ll come up with a Yandere spork or dildo next.

[silversky9]

So the take away was what? A man who overcame so much and grew and wants so much to have a found family just ends up alone now ? Just continues to be by himself? Loses the connections he has made that he has longed for for most of his life? Because he decided to break up?

That wasn't Tommy deciding . That was a writer who clearly didn't know what to do with an amazing character who had so much potential, that could have gone on so many journeys with the 118 and was clearly so attentive and loving to his boyfriend.

They built him up and how is any other love interest gonna even compare and they just said nah. They just want Buck fucking around now and we basically gonna forget how Tommy was there for so much, for everyone. As Eddie's friend, for chim and Hen, at the hospital for Denny. Helping Buck through his injuries

Oh but yea, now he ends up alone again. And it's just so bleak . Like what's the fucking point even. I didn't just want bucktommy. I came to care for Tommy as an individual character as well.

[garbinge]

The Year of 1969

Johnny Davis x F!Reader Benny Cross & F!Reader

Summary: You decide to leave Chicago with your brother and have to break the news to Johnny.

Word Count: 2.4k 

Warnings: Grief. Loss. Main Character Death. Canon Spoilers. Angst. 

A/N: First Bikeriders fic I’m posting!!! But I have a buuuunch more coming. I decided to rewatch today and just got hit with this idea. Enjoy!

The Bikeriders Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @kmc1989

You put it off for far too long. To the point that now you were juggling with whether it’d be worth telling him now or have him just figure it out when you were gone. That’s what you were currently doing, right outside The Stoplight, deciding which option would hurt him less. You knew which one would be easier for you, just leave without a word, but you also knew it wasn’t fair. He just had to say goodbye to his best friend, Brucie, and you saw how much that wrecked him. And now you were going to pile this on as well. 

Before you could think anymore your legs pushed you through the doors of the bar, the light smokey haze mixed with the low sound of music meant that it wasn’t busy, just a few of the guys. Made sense since it was still light outside, most of the guys were probably still working but the ones that were here probably had earlier shifts or were off like Johnny who didn’t have a trucking run for another week. 

“He-eey.” The voice was cheery as Corky welcomed you in. It caused a few other of the guys to look up and greet you with smiles, Johnny included. His smile wasn’t as big as the others, or even like his normal grin. That’s what made this even harder, when Johnny lost Brucie, not only did things with the club change, but so did things within Johnny. And now you were going to break him more. 

“Hey guys.” You smiled, similarly to Johnny. 

“Where’s your brother?” Cockroach leaned forward, “told me he’d let me take a few shots on his camera one day, learn about loading film n’ stuff.” He was smiling from ear to ear, looking at the other Vandals as he boasted. Little did Cockroach know, your brother was packing up his stuff for New York as you stood there with your stuff in the car already. 

“He’s uh–” You thought of an excuse but just couldn’t bear it and turned to Johnny. “Can I talk to you for a second, Johnny?” 

The guys might have been a little oblivious sometimes, but they picked up on your tone immediately. Their smiles were vanished from their faces and suddenly they were all trying to look anywhere but at you and Johnny. 

“Yea–uh, let’s go outside.” Johnny was standing up and placed his hand around your back lightly to guide you outside. 

The sun was starting to set, it was honestly one of your favorite times at The Stoplight, the way the sun would cast its golden rays on the line of bikes that would be outside. Maybe it was the artist in you, since living with your brother you tended to see the beauty in things like that. Moments you wanted to capture and keep alive forever. It was a shame that now, as the sun glistened on the paint jobs of the bikes and the road fell silent and Johnny stood a few feet from the bar entrance, this was a moment you’d never want to remember, one that’d you drink to forget. 

“Smoke?” Johnny asked as he stood on the sidewalk near the curb. 

“I’m alright, thank you.” It was then that you moved to stand next to him, arms crossed, taking a deep breath as the words started to move from your mind to your throat. 

It took you a few minutes, ones that you two just stood in silence for. That wasn’t unusual for you two, there were tons of times where you and Johnny didn’t talk, it was usually because you were doing other things, his mouth was preoccupied with your own, or the guys were around and your conversations were with them all. But right now it felt unusual because normally when it was just you two, you’d talk, about everything and nothing at all. The TV shows you’d watch, the news, stories, you’d love to tell Johnny stories, real ones, fiction ones. You’d talk about the shots you took on the camera your brother gave you, your purpose. It was what brought you here in the first place, at your brother’s place. Lack of purpose. You thought if you’d learn about what Danny was up to at school, you’d learn something yourself, and you did. But you weren’t sure if photography was truly it. It was Johnny who told you that you should tell stories, like the people on the news when it clicked. You wanted to be where the action was, a writer and newscaster. 

“You see those guys with those helmets they launched up into space?” Johnny broke the silence after exhaling the cigarette smoke. “Travellin’ round the moon and the stars and stuff.” He was nodding. “That, uh, Barbara Walters you told me to watch was reportin’ it. Cool shit.” 

“Johnny I’m leaving.” You blurted the sentence out, the pain coming right along with it as you felt your stomach knot. 

It was like instinct, he looked over at your car. The suitcases were piled up in your backseat, the one that you two so frequently found yourselves in over the last few years. 

“Where ya headed?” It was far too casual for your liking, but you also knew not to expect much else from him. 

“New York. With Danny.” You mentioned your brother’s name and he nodded as it all clicked in his head. He could’ve been mad, said something along the lines of maybe trying to do something for yourself for once and not follow someone else’s dream, someone else’s life. But he knew it wouldn’t have been true. He knew exactly what you were going to do once you were in New York. 

“Heard they got that, uh, big music festival out over ‘dere in the uh big apple, you oughta head there and check it out, write a story on it.” He was pointing in a direction like it was where New York was as he spoke. “Nixon election’s comin’ up too, could write about that.” He dropped his head to the left, his face moving to a frown, thinking how that could also be a viable option.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.” Any other time you would have loved to talk about all the stories you were going to get over on the east coast, but right now you were just hoping you could leave on semi-decent terms with Johnny. 

“S’no problem.” He inhaled one last puff of the cigarette and dropped it on the ground. 

You were turning to look at him now, arms still crossed, emotion building up as tears in your eyes. 

“Stop all dat.” He tossed his arm over your shoulders and looked out at the sunset. “When you leavin’?” While he knew it was tonight, he wanted to know how much time he had left, it would determine what he’d say, how he’d act, although the more he thought about what your answer would be and what he’d do, the answers all felt pretty similar. 

“Later tonight, I got a couple hours.” You were leaning into him, arms still against your chest as you brought your hand up to wipe the tears. 

“Get back in dere.” He tipped his head toward the bar. “Grab a drink, we’ll hang for a while.” 

“For a while.” You accepted his offer, looking back up at him. 

“Go.” He smirked, his arm releasing you now. “Before more show up and you’re left with the shitty beer. I’ll be in in a minute.”

As you went back inside, Johnny’s smile faded. He pulled out another cigarette and walked over toward your car and just stared at the bags in the back as he smoked the cigarette down. He must’ve lit up a few because when he came back to it, there were about 5 buds on the ground next to him, the sun had set and Benny was approaching him. 

“Everything good, Johnny?” He was leaning curiously toward the man before he entered the bar. 

“No, s’not.” He mumbled under his breath as he let his head fall back for the quickest second before looking over at Benny and joining him at the entrance of the bar. Johnny’s hand raised and flew over Benny’s shoulder. “Hey, yea, everything’s’well.” 

________

“Hey, you hear about that weird thing over in Chicago?” Your coworker walked up to your desk and interrupted a thought of yours. Your eyes closed and you collected your frustration as you looked up and made eye contact with them.

“What weird thing?” 

“Someone was murdered in Chicago.” Your coworker leaned on the wall of your cubicle. The first part of the sentence, surprisingly didn’t shock you, as a news reporter you had received a lot of stories similar and you were really concentrated on making this deadline for your next piece to end up in the paper, but when they said Chicago, you started to pay attention. “Chicago?” 

“Yea, some gang violence or something. They sent someone out there to report on it, I think Gary from features, he’s packing up his stuff now. Seems like they’re gonna write a big thing on bikers and the uprising of motorcycle clubs.” 

That’s when your heart started to sink. “You get a name?” Your body was frozen but you were waiting to hear someone’s name that was familiar to you for you to grab your things and leave. Cal. Zipco. Benny. Corky. But not his. 

“I think Johnny something–Davis! Johnny Davis.” 

Within seconds you were in your car, one destination in mind, you had gotten more information on a small town radio station which is how you learned where it happened. The whole drive you wouldn’t let your mind think about it, let it be real. As you pulled up to the abandoned parking lot, you wouldn’t have been shocked if you didn’t even put your car in park, you were stepping out so quickly. You weren’t exactly sure what you were looking for, but it was true that you’d know when you saw it. Because you did. The blood stained on the pavement made you freeze and that’s when your heart finally broke and reality sunk in. 

You remembered your last memory with him.

His hands wrapping around your face as he leaned against your car, his feet still on the curb but his back against the car. You were on top of him, laughing as he placed a kiss to your lips. “Thanks for the last minute farewell party.”

“If you gave me a heads up, coulda had Corky bring streamers.” 

You remembered how much pain that comment brought you and how he realized it immediately. 

“Hey, ey, ain’t meant nothin’ bout that comment. Just shootin’ the breeze with you.” He kissed you again, this time with no smiles, no laughs just pure passion. 

“Let’s go for a ride.” You whispered against his lips, your way of prolonging your goodbye.

“Think it’s probably time for you to head outta here, s’late.” Johnny still had his arm around you and his other lightly touching your face. 

“One last ride.” You whispered again. 

Johnny knew if he got you on his bike, he’d drive the night away in avoidance of letting you go. He also knew every time he got back on his bike he’d think of you and he couldn’t handle that. So as he kissed you quiet again, his left hand moved to open the passenger seat of your car. He didn’t say anything but he didn’t need to. You knew what he was saying. You pushed off him, despite everything in you wanting to crawl back on him in that awkward position and stay there forever. As you dropped your bag in the passenger seat, he closed it and walked around to the driver’s side and opened it up. With a deep sigh, you plopped inside and immediately leaned out the window, your arms crossed hanging outside. 

He leaned down, his arm resting on the top of the car’s roof now. “Will miss you tellin’ me those stories, but I’ll, uh, get one of the guys to help me send a letter to subscribe to the New York news.” 

“Just don’t have Corky imitate my voice.” You smirked. “He really exaggerates my midwestern accent.” 

“Nah, I’ll just call ya and have you read ‘em to me.”

“You promise.” Your face got serious, it felt like that statement needed reassurance. Most of your relationship with Johnny was all jokes and fun, so you needed to know if he was serious.  He stared at you for a minute, his face getting serious as well. His hand tapped the roof of your car, “You better take the ‘spressway, 490s always  backed up.” 

He didn’t break the promise, because he never made it. 

“Will miss you listenin’ to my stories.” You mumbled, staring at the blood stain, trying to imagine what happened and every scenario was wrecking you thought by thought, until your thoughts were interrupted by a loud engine approaching. 

Your body turned and you saw Benny Cross, eagerly walking up and standing next to you. Emotion heavy on his face as he stared at the blood stain. Neither of you said anything, just stared. There was no tension, just every other emotion you could think of instead. 

“Heard you left.” It should have made Benny jump but he felt numb and just nodded before talking. 

“Not long after you did.” Benny agreed. 

You just acknowledged him with the same gesture. “I’m back in Chicago.” 

“Me too.” 

Silence again, still both of you just looking at the red mark that had turned deep red almost brown on the dark pavement. 

“I’m done riding.” Benny broke the silence this time. Your head turned to look over at the bike that he took here and that he’d likely drive out of here and you frowned in confusion but then you realized.  He just came back just like you. When you said you were back in Chicago, you weren’t really back in Chicago, you were just back in Chicago, like 1 hour back. Your car just drove over the Illinois border an hour ago, and you think Benny did the same. 

So now, the two of you just stood numb, over the blood of the one man you both knew and loved, wordless as the grief draped over both of you.

[lains-reality]

hi :) i hope you’re having a wonderful day

you’re literally the only blogger i trust when it comes to non-duality, and your advice has been the one i’ve been most easily able to apply/understand. I hope this doesn’t come off as a vent, but it probably will just because this question is so complicated and problem riddled, and tbh idek if you’re actually going to respond, but yea. it’s like star wars you’re my obi wan kenobi! my last hope lol

basically i’ve put my life on hold and procrastinated everything i’ve needed to do. (TW: death?? health problems/sa?) I went through a really bad year, last year. the human character i identify with (non-dualistic terms, bc ik this character isn’t me?) was sa’d in the beginning of the year. really traumatic. i dropped out of school, i couldn’t go out of the house because i feared for my life. i became super paranoid. i reported it and filed charges, but the justice system is fucked so.

anyways, after because the amount of stress i was experiencing, i became very ill. my biological father wished death on me, and i believed it at the time, because my sibling wished for me to get raped, and then it happened. i can see now, how my belief may or may not have been the cause of what happened. i then got cancer. the doctors couldn’t figure it out for months, and even ridiculed me- saying how i relied on google.

i finally went to a specialist who was immediately concerned, and then confirmed my suspicions. i was sort of friends with a blogger on here who got into the void and manifested their dream life. they went into the void for me and affirmed that i no longer had cancer, and that i could tap/wake up in the void. the next day, the huge lump/tumor on my neck was gone. all of my ailments- trouble breathing, patchy and rough skin ceased. i literally told my mother what happened which made her start believing in the power of “manifestation”.

because of the paranoia, and then cancer- i didn’t go to school my last 2 years of school. i switched to online, but never felt the need to complete my classes because i knew i would get into the void. i’ve gotten into the void, both by waking up/tapping into it but i haven’t been able to change my awareness, or “manifest” bc i was just mumbo jumbing words or poetry. i didn’t apply to university, because i thought i’d enter the void before then and revise my school grades + make it so i got into the university of my choice.

now, i have a week left before i have to finish my classes- which i have 7 of them, and so many assignments. i have to move out in the middle of august because i lied to my parents and said i got into university, because i thought i would’ve already changed things with the void by now. my life was fucked, then i fucked my life. after discovering non-duality i gained hope that i would be able to turn things around by now, yet i haven’t. i don’t know what i’m doing wrong, because i was able to show myself the truth of reality (as lester levinson said).

i am really stressing because now everything is falling down on itself. i try to forget my problems, and don’t give them life by letting go, yet it’s so hard when teachers are bombarding me with messages how i have to finish the classes, or how i have to move out soon. i know this is probably ego driven, but i feel as if i can’t see a way through because of how attached i am to this. my health has also been abnormal, which makes me fear that the cancer has returned. what should i do?? im kinda freaking out.

anyways, i am so sorry if this came across trauma dumping/venting. i am just at a point where i do not even know where to begin to conceptualize this into understanding. this took a lot of courage to type, as im a bit afraid still- that people who hurt me from last year will see this (even though i know they won’t, but still). i totally understand if you wish not to post this or answer it, as it is very long and limiting. thank you though! i hope you have a wonderful week:)

this was quite difficult to answer as i've never been through so much turmoil all at once. i hope this answer helps and you'll continue taking care of yourself! (i'm sorry i linked way too much lol just don't read it all at once!)

firstly i want you to rest.

you've been through a lot and you've also been putting off a lot to get into the void. stopping life for manifestation is common it seems, its not healthy either. so much pressure is coming from time. you put all your expectations on a method, and i'm gonna guess that you also put so much onto your mind to get you into the void.

practically: your biological father sounds abusive and so does your sibling, i would be more careful around him. idk if your not around him anymore, it sounds like it? but you need to plan accordingly for your lie. are you gonna tell your parents or ?

theres a massive chance you'll just go crazy trying to figure out all these moving parts, so i suggest do what you can and leave the rest. do the minimum to keep you safe, then figure out the rest as it comes. do whatever you need to do, just remember to not take on too much at once.

ask for breaks on work at school for medical reasons, maybe think about jobs, etc. you see how much more could come into the picture? but this is all the body-mind can do. its easy to treat it as god, but its not god.

"but i feel as if i can’t see a way through"

You fail to do the works of God, because you take the body to be God. - Ada B. [4dbarbie]

take a look at these meditations:

butter meditation

peace meditation

surrender meditation

un-identification exercise

crying meditation

i'd like you pick one of these exercises:

feel all the shit. feel bad. just do it. let all the bad feelings out. put on sad music and fucking cry. cry it all out.

let yourself rest, with no problems. if a thought or feeling comes in just let it, because its not a problem remember? :) just put on some calming music or visualise a calming place. and let yourself have some time with nothing. no conditions. no perfection. no obligations. no 'have to' 'should' 'must'. let that go for this time

feel as if you've died. feel as if you've been completely forgiven, feel as if there was a powerful white light that washed you away of all the crap. really feel as if the divine came down, hugged you and said 'i love you and forgive you'. its all over. finally its all done. you can rest. (i suggest kickstarting this with imagery or music, its hard to generate feeling such grace on you own. i saw a jesus holding a baby lamb picture that made me burst out in tears and realised that all i wanted was just to be, no obligations. i imagined waking up in a heaven, in a gaint flowerfield. do what you want)

one time i did the 1st and 3rd exercises (i made it up on the spot) and it was worth it. the next few days felt much better. its like an exercise in rebirth. let yourself be reborn.

some days you'll just do one or all 3. pick what ever feels right in what ever order. but i suggest that 'feel as if you've died' or 'no problems' comes last! the whole point is to let the painful emotion pass through and settle in a neutral or grateful place.

"after discovering non-duality i gained hope that i would be able to turn things around by now"

here's the problem, you went into a philosophy intending to manifest. yes,, (1) you can do that (2) its okay, AS LONG AS YOU DONT MISS THE POINT. the point being that there is no person! the character is a character, not you. manifestation is just another concept, you can use it as long as you understand that its not real. thats why i shared the BOOKS, you need to READ.

"i try to forget my problems, and don’t give them life by letting go"

don't force yourself to forget (don't say you're not forcing it, otherwise you never would of wrote "TRY"). just let them be. deal with it when it comes up. the mind'll want to make a bazillion plans and stress. if you can make plans without spiriling, then do it. if you can't, don't. there will probably be some things you need to plan and thats okay. but everything else, leave it.

you haven't actually let it go, you're here in my inbox. you do not need to force letting it go. you naturally let it go by realising who you are in relation to it all. if you think you're the body-mind then its impossible to let go, because its your life and it involves you and if you let it go to shit, you might die!! - says the mind. but if you're Self, then this is not you. all those stories mean nothing compared to Infinity, Absolute Perfection and Love!

the Self is who you truly are. Self is still underneath it all, it is all. its imagining itself being a human. the character is the wave, YOU are the ocean. ultimately this is about realising all the identities, images and roles that "you've" taken on and used as reference are not you. how can a story be you? how can the past be you? are you the past? are you currently living in the past? you can be if you keep bringing it into the now.

when you stop using the past as a reference point, how much more posibilities come up now?

this is because the mind only knows what it knows. it cannot know anything more than what it knows right now. it can't access infinite intelligence. that's why it'll try to project into the future, and make plans. but it doesn't truly know. all it does is give suggestions based off the past. it is a combination of identity based off feelings, thoughts and memories that is collected and turned into a habit.

the past, memories, feelings, thoughts, identifies, roles etc all pass through you. they all come up like waves and then leave on THEIR OWN. if you hold onto these (which the character wants to do, it thinks thats all it is) it'll be painful when they are threatened in some way. a simple remark of "oh you look xxx" can be so painful for some characters because they based their whole life on a singular identity that WILL go.

Most of you can't change because you are so desperate TO change... but there is nothing to want to change. Things just are. Don't work with changing self, just realize who self actually is. [4dbarbie]

this is not a forcing thing, its just a rememberance. its done out of love, passion, a desire to just be free! with no ties to whatever identity! its takes courage, not convincing or denial.

Disbelieving you are Vanessa and denial are not the same thing. Denial is when you deny reality to something you're already giving reality to. Disbelieving was meant as an experiment, you never thought yourselves to be anything but this body, what will happen if you did? What are changes in your psyche, do you feel more confident, do you feel like you could take on the world? Don't you love Vanessa now that you know that she always was a choice? Even if she wasn't the greatest, what's so wrong with her? She is just somebody, she just lives a life. Things are only so serious when you're identified with her, you get scared, you get hurt, you feel stuck. But when you know that she can't hinder you? That she was never you? Don't you just want to laugh and hug her? [4dbarbie]

are you sure you're reading books and posts? a lot of this is already answered. your case is just more to deal with, but the point is still the same: you are not the body and mind, see what would happen if you questioned them.

just KEEP IT SIMPLE!

i'd like to leave you with this.

Once a young woman came to Hafiz and said, “What is the sign of someone knowing God?” And Hafiz became very quiet and stood in silence for nearly a minute. Lovingly looking deep into the young woman's eyes, he then softly spoke: “My dear, they have dropped the knife. The person who knows God has dropped the cruel knife so often used upon their tender self and others.” [source]

some extra resources

eft - health fear

eft - afraid to feel

we cannot practice letting go

heart of an emotion

i want to wake up with everything

hafiz - love's victory (PLEASE WATCH IT)

trust yourself

"You think you're doing it all for nothing, that's why you don't do it. But is freedom from pain really nothing? At least you are, for once in your life, sighing from relief from all this never-ending sense of doing."

health anon

apply

"All the process requires is letting go of thinking you are Vanessa."

behaviour

letting thoughts and emotions pass

challenge yourself

stories

everything brings you back to your Self

you've been through a lot and i'm glad you still are full of love! otherwise you never would've tried in the first place to change anything. use that love, take any anger and turn it into love for freedom! for Self! i know you can do it!!

also: the feeling of bad health coming back is a sign to me. you've put so much on hold: your healing from the sa, the healing from your family, the lying, LIFE in general. you can't keep doing that. turn inwards. the fear won't consume you.

[greeniegaes]

Second part to the au where SQQ sacrifices himself into the abyss

Character reactions:

Shang Qinghua: Freaking out!! He thought SQQ was dead and that his story would be utterly in shambles, only to suddenly hear through the grapevine he’s not! He goes and visits him in recovery and SQQ knows he’s a transmigrator and yells at him for the Mobei Jun incident, almost sending himself into a qi deviation before SQH is banned from SQQ’s house for the time being lmao

Liu Qingge: Is the one that found him unconscious at Qing Jing’s entrance. there was an over all feeling of relief and grief at the same time. On one hand the man who saved his life and countless others was alive. On the other hand his shixiong had went through countless horrors, had his honor stripped from him and looks like he barely survived. He wishes he could’ve gone after him, he wishes that he could’ve protected SQQ better, he wishes he got to that fight before without a cure infected him. He takes his time to bask in the man’s presence now though, just to admire how strong his shixiong is

Yue Qingyuan: This wet dog of a man never stopped looking for his Shidi…. Even through questionable channels. Hey! If you came across a heavenly demon that yea was supposed to be dead BUT ISNT wouldn’t you want to ask him for help to rescue someone that is so far out of your reach. (Sorry ZSL) Once he finally realized that he’s back home he’s flooded with so much relief he just conks out in the middle of work

Mu Qingfang: ‘oh fuck oh fuck SO many heart demons what the FUCK oh god his meridians- are somehow better??? Why does he have demonic, human and celestial qi- what the fuck what happened- oh my goodness so much shit healed wrong’ <-internal thoughts, in reality is completely silent as he works to heal the unconscious man and make sure he doesn’t die in the first few days of being back home

Various disciples of QJ: all want to swarm the man and get/give affection but they don’t want to overwhelm him so they make up a schedule of who gets to keep him company while he recovers (LBH is always there and then one or two others come) A lot of them cried when someone passes out the various booklets, letters of invitation and advice to them, realizing that their shizun thought he was going to die at some point and prepared this in advance

And finally. The boy~!

Luo Binghe: He felt so much anguish as he watched his teacher fall. He couldn’t go after the man that had protected him and taught him. Most of his days on QJ were spent as a blur, trying to keep some semblance of normality as he kept the bamboo house spotless, made sure all the disciples were cared for and made the sword mound in his Shizun’s offer. At the steps of the sword mound so many foods, trinkets, fans, small weapons and jewelry rotted and rusted away. Once SQQ came back to the hut LBH weeped. He made the man tea and foods easy on the stomach, carefully attending him. He wanted to cry when he saw his Shizun’s hair, the man had given up ever returning. He became x10 sticker as a result and was insistent on staying by his side.

[fictionalmenmakemecry]

Carmy Losin' Cool

Characters: Carmy Berzatto x reader

Summary: Things getting heated in the kitchen making Carmy emotions runs high. This leads to him acting out of character and making you beg for mercy.

Warnings: Fluff, Cursing

Author's note: Thinking of doing more The Bear fan fiction. Please let me know if you would like me to continue on this!

"Carmy, I need you to calm down" I grabbed his arm wanting him to draw his attention to me instead of the chaos around him.

"Fuck! This can't be happening..." His eyes were darting everywhere.

He pulled his hands up to his hair, tugging it, completely overwhelmed.

Hearing the printer continuously burning through paper as more tickets appeared.

"I-I'm so sorry" Sydney muttered coming to the realization of what was happening.

"I told you. I told you over and over. OVER AND OVER!" He raised his voice pointing aggressively at the takeout tablet.

" I checked it! It said that- " Sydney quivered.

I looked over and caught her line of sight. She had the look of fear in her eyes. She never saw Carmy like this. This heated. This angry.

"Get the FUCK out of the kitchen!" Carmy yelled picking up the fallen tickets that were now overflowing the shelf.

She didn't budget. Frozen.

"Syd, come on" I tried to usher her, getting in between her and Carmy.

"NOW!" He shouted feeling his breath on the back of my neck his arm extended to the door.

I pulled her by the arm leading her out of the kitchen. She followed like a zombie, completely hazed. I grabbed her bag from her locker and brought her to the front door.

I could hear Carmy giving aggressive orders in the back, still hearing the rage in his voice.

"I fucked up" She had finally caught up to what had happened.

I just nodded, wanting her to go home and let the everyone calm down.

"What's going to happen?" She looked at me, half way out the door.

I paused for a moment holding the door open but not looking away.

"Just stay away for the next two days. I'll talk to him" I said wanting this day to be over.

She nodded gently before giving me a fake soft smile but still seeing the sadness in her eyes.

I watched as she left and locked the door. I took a deep breath for a moment knowing I was going to have to stay calm in the whirlwind of emotions in the back.

I made my way back and continued to hear the dominant voice of Carmy still dictating away.

I walked in slowly and watched everyone work frantically, The only noises were Carmy, the banging of pans and the occasional 'Yes Chef'.

I turned around and went into the office. I was going to busy myself with overdue bills until this nightmare burnt out.

_________

"Hey" A soft voice spoke out.

I popped my head up from the mess of paper piles that were on my lap.

I saw Carmy leaning against the doorframe. His usual white t-shirt covered in fresh stains.

I didn't say anything. I was trying to read his mood before opening my mouth.

"I'm sorry about that in there." He gestured behind him.

I pressed my lips together but didn't say a word.

"Uhhh.. I know I'm a shit head for shouting at Syd the way I did." His head dropped.

He brought his hand up to his face and rubbed his eye, I could feel the exhaustion just by looking at him.

"You're going to have to apologize. We really need her." I murmured playing with the corner of the fold pages on my lap.

"Yea, I know. I fucked up" He whispered.

The kitchen doorway opened behind him and I saw a black curly hair behind Carmy.

"Goodnight Tina" I smiled

"Goodnight Boss" I heard back.

Carmy faced her and I could see half of her through the the doorway.

"All done?" He asked

She nodded giving a half smile.

"Everyone else gone home?"

"Yeah, you should both too. It's getting late" She pointed at the clock on the desk beside me.

1:30am. I swore it was 8:00pm a couple of hours ago.

She gave one more smile and gave Carmy a reassuring arm rub before leaving us.

I could feel the heaviness in my eyelids now that my body was aware of the time.

"I'm gonna head out" He looked back over at me.

I nodded pulling myself off the ground and bundling all the papers off the floor.

"Okay, well I'm going to check that everything is off and I'll be out in a min" I smiled.

We looked at each other for a moment. The heaviness I felt in my stomach when I realized how we got to this moment. The death of his brother, the immediate burden of this place on his shoulders and letting go of his old life.

I walked over closer to him and leaned into him. I wanted to give him a hug. I felt his arms wrap around me. The smell on onions off of him was stronger than usual. His skin burning hot. I could even feel it under his t-shirt. I was about to let go and felt him still holding the hug so I continue to hold him until I felt him lean back.

"Thank you" He whispered looking at me with his constant melancholy eyes.

He left the doorway and made his way to his locker.

I went back into the kitchen. The usual darkness except for the emergency exit lights. Giving the room a green hue. I ran my eyes over to check nothing was left out and everything was off.

I turned around and bumped into a body.

I let out a little yelp completely startled.

I looked up and saw Carmy looking down at me. Very close.

"Is everything okay?" I asked worryingly.

He nodded softly but never leaving my eyes.

My mind froze. I looked down at his lips. I felt him leaning into me. I couldn't stop myself if I tried. I brought my hands up to his chest. I wanted to taste him. I wanted to feel his lips against mine. His tongue against mine.

Our lips met. His were soft and warm. Our lips moved making the kiss deeper and deeper until I could taste him. Feel his mouth. His tongue gently caress mine. I relaxed into him, releasing a small moan in the back of my throat.

I felt him pull me in closer after that. He was hungry for me. That delicateness was fading away. I brought my hand down to his crotch to feel his hard bulge underneath. I heard his immediate appraisal from deep in his throat.

He pulled away, us both taking deep breaths.

He grabbed my hips and placed me on the steel surface urgently.

He looked at me his hands on my thighs but making their way further up. He paused for a moment.

I mouthed "Please". The heat coming from between my thighs was unbearable. Him looking at me that way made it worse.

A small smile appeared on his face, which made me more wet.

He hovered his hands over my clothed pussy before reaching up to unbutton my jeans. His nimble fingers popped them in a second. I glanced down at him to see him still looking at me.

He started slowly pulling down my pants, I raised my hips wanting to move this faster. He seemed to enjoy me begging at his mercy,

"Fuck" He leaned in his lips barely touching mine.

"I need this" He continued with his blue eyes taken over by lust.

The crack of a door was distant, pulling us out of our trance of neediness. We stayed still for a moment waiting for other sounds.

"Carmy, Y/n? You still here? I always forget my fucking phone." Tina voice travelled as she walked further into the restaurant.

We both snapped into gear. He pulled me fast off the counter and grabbed my hand. We raced to the walk in fridge. He closed the door gently behind us. We both stayed still try to listen for anything. But it was so insulated there, it was no use.

I looked down to see my jeans still unbuttoned. I looked up and redid them to see Carmy smiling with his hand in his hair.

"Close one" He whispered smiling back at me.

Masterlist for other fics

Let me know what you think!

[nikethestatue]

Chaotic Reading of the Azriel Bonus Chapter

So I meant to do this a while back, but just never got to it. Made my BF read Azriel's bonus chapter and the HOFAS bonus chapter.

(He knows names of characters--Elain, Azriel, Cassian and Nesta. He doesn't know who Gwyn is. He is generally only interested in Cassian, because 'he is strong and handsome' and looks like him. Doesn't exactly know who Rhys is, but knows the name and knows that he is in charge. Also he calls Rhys 'the main wizard'. For some reason he thinks that Fae are wizards. So here you go.)

Recorded reactions:

Oh, he depressed. Why? He didn't like his Solstice gifts?

Cassian is pounding Nesta, isn't he?

Oh, there she is! Who is she? Oh Elain! Hi pretty girl! Emo boi is into her for sure.

Is she into him? Because why? He is kind of boring. Is Cassian a one woman man?

Ohhh, he wants to tap that!

Oh, he really wants to tap that!

What the hell kinda weird gift is this? Babe (this is directed at me), don't give me ear plugs for Christmas.

Eat that pussy bruh!

Is he gonna bite her? he should bite her!

It's a cute gift. He could've gone a little flashier though. Maybe throw in a diamond and a ruby.

Oh, look, she is offering it on a silver platter!

Wait, why is this guy here?

Wait? he is not gonna eat that pussy?

Where. Is. The. Smut?

Bruh is a cock blocker on steroids. Wait, who is Lucien?

Why do we care about Lucien? (I explain briefly)

Blood Duel sounds rad.

Elain is stepping out with the emo Azriel on her mate. (laughs) They sound Australian! (proceeds to say 'mate' a lot in an Australian accent)

Is there gonna be a blood duel?

I feel like there is a lot of teasing in this chapter.

Oh, he is cold. He just went 'this was a mistake?!!" Yea, girls love hearing that.

Who is Mor? An ex? Oh, it's that chick you don't like. I feel you.

Babe (addressing me), this Azriel of yours has no game. This Rhys guy the Grand Wizard just told him to back off and he backed off? Who does that?! That pussy isn't gonna lick itself. Poor Elain. I hope she throws that necklace back in his face. Can I blood duel the shit out of him?

Don't like him at all!

(I correct him and tell him that Rhys is a High Lord not a Grand Wizard (that would be the KKK))

*mutters under his breath* He is acting like a Grand Wizard!

Yeah, be depressed emo boi! Who leaves a lady hanging like that?

Yeah, well, she is better off with Cassian anyway.

Does Elain have special powers? Can she burn him or something? Or Rhys? Rhys needs to mind his own business. Wait, back up. Lucien is in the same house? She doesn't like Lucien, does she? (laughs)

So if they kissed, they'd just do it in the living room for everyone to see? That's bold of them.

This chapter is very frustrating.

Emo boi needs self-esteem classes.

Who the hell is she?

Is he into her too?

Noooo, he is not into her! What bloody memory? Did they fight?

Why is she cutting the ribbon on Christmas?

Is she like a nun?

Wait, he lives in a convent with nuns?

Oh she is a priestess? Of what? Is she a nun?

(Explain to him that she is not a nun)

But he lives with a bunch of nuns?

(Explain the layout of the House of Wind)

He is into Elain, so I guess he doesn't care. Also, this setup is weird. Does he not have an apartment? Wait, he lives with Nesta and Cassian? Like roommates? Or is this a menage? No, it's not a menage, right? Because he wants to eat Elain out--and DIDN'T (kind of yelling at this point)

(Explain it's not a menage. But Nesta wouldn't mind if it were)

Okay, this conversation is boring.

He sings? Like in a band?

Oh, this is like "Kill Bill". Emo Azriel is Pi Mei. He is teaching her to kill people. I can respect that.

...This chapter is weird. Why is this part even here? Is she gonna cut the ribbon?

All I am imagining right now is Gwyneth Paltrow cutting a ribbon with a sword. (laughs)

Nope, she did not cut the ribbon.

(proceeds to offer a lengthy explanation on how difficult it is to cut a ribbon like this. I am forced to listen.)

Azriel can cut a ribbon! I think SJM legit stole this whole training idea from 'Kill Bill'. Didn't the Bride have to cut a ribbon too?

(He is not wrong)

Okay, so..........now he just leaves? What was the point of this whole part with her? I don't get it.

Ahhhhh, my girl! She left that necklace for him to find! Yeah, you go girl, feminist queen!

Not even gonna ask about this snowball fight. Is this like a cutsey thing they do?

Ohh, who is Clotho? Is she like Fate? Why are the seven bells singled out? Does it mean something? She can't talk? Aww she feels bad for him. Well, she shouldn't! (said aggressively)

I feel like this necklace is more than just a necklace. Do they explain it later?

(No)

Okay, so he just gives it away? Oh god. Please don't say Clotho is going to give it to Gwyn!! No. No. That's weird.

So wait, that's it?

This is what you guys have been fighting over for three years? (laughs) That's stupid (he is not wrong) But what are you fighting over? That he should've beaten Rhys's ass?

(no, some say that he is into Gwyn because of the last line)

Like romantically? (asks incredulously) What are you fucking stupid?

(decisively)

As a man, I can tell you he is not into her. If you are gonna give a woman a gift, you don't go through others. You want to see her reaction. You want to see her smile. You want to put it on her. The first part did it right. Not sure what the purpose of the second part was, but I hope he and Elain get some kind of a resolution, but he needs to ask for forgiveness. And so does Rhys. Does Gwyn cut the ribbon at some point?

(Yes)

Good for her. Now she can go and start avenging shit, like the Bride.

Final question, does he eat Elain's pussy at some point?

(No)

She should ask Cassian. He'd do it. And do it well.

The End

[sevs-corner]

COD x (Soldier) Reader/You (Retired Comfy AU)

PSA:

Characters may be OOC (i'm new to the plot and fandom)

Straight up crack fic and very unserious

afab aligned reader

Clunky format ‘cause this site hates me so im using my phone to post lol

Might become a mini series hehe

Separate post on summary/ idea of the plot behind this but for now- enjoy the introductory one-shot !

• As a friend in arms, you knew how most of you had to escape the government (because of their corruption) and end up at a rural area at some random European country Lasswell guided your misfits of arms to

• Currently, you were all in a plane to Switzerland with the 414 crew

• "Can I finally go into a genuine Ikea?"

• Breaking the tense silence in the plane, the four couldn't help but turn to you with a deranged look of, 'what the fuck.'

• "say that again luv?" Gaz asks exasperatedly, wondering if you were serious just now, but seeing the sparkling gleam in your eyes-- that was a hard no.

• "I mean c'mon!" you whined, "wouldn't you wanna see Blahaj?"

• "who the hell is that?" Ghost scoffed, but amused at how unserious you were being right now and at how you gasped as if he said something so offensive

• Whipping your head to Ghost, who sat across from you with Price to his right and Gaz to his left, you mutter an offended, "how dare you not know such thing!"

• "who are they then pup?" Soap leans in with his arm over your shoulder, pulling you in

• "only the greatest mascot ever!" you replied back and shoving a tiny plushie in his face, making him back up with a quick, "holy-!" in surprise

• How did you procure that from thin air? The task force would never know.

• "This-!" You emphasized, "is Blahaj!" you began humming a holy song as you lifted your tiny Blahaj plushie in the air as the 4 (unknowing to you) were trying so hard to keep in their laughs

• "did ya always have that on ya'?" Price just had to ask- no, he needed to know if you kept that on your pack at all times

• "obviously!" you huffed with your chest out ever so confidently, "its my lucky charm…" you stare at it in reminiscing, feeling the rough texture of the plushie as it had gone through the years of fighting alongside you.

• "yer side kick then, aye?" Soap messes your hair while chuckling, you were just like an adorable puppy to him

• So overly hyper and affectionate, but ever so loyal yet vicious when pushed to be

• You leaned even more into his embrace, sighing at the familiar comfort it gave you in tough times as these

• "yea, 'tis always been with me-- like you guys!" you first smiled at Soap who squeezed you harder and mirrored your own grin before turning to the others who's eyes couldn't help but soften at the account

• "that’s true," Gaz chuckles, "we've been through everything with each other"

• "At this point- it'd be weird if we didn't, aye?" Price added on with Ghost humming along, despite the eye roll he gave you as playfully teased him with a knowing stare

• "I bet you guys did everything alright," you mutter teasingly, making everyone groan

• "don't act as if I'm wrong!" you pointedly glare at everyone but soon direct it to a Soap who- quite clearly- became red at your insinuation.

• Seeing this, you took your opportunity to shove the arm off you as you gasp, "so scandalous of you Sarge MacTavish!"

• "Shut the fuck up pup," he groans, covering his face as he pushes your wiggling ass eyebrows face away, but as soon as he did you dodged and directed it this time to Ghost who just huffed at your assumption

• "Wild guessing now are we?" He asks you confidently while you cackled

• "You think I haven't seen you guys fuck back at base or something? Y'all think the walls are soundproof or some shit."

• Hearing your admission, now all of them were embarrassed.

• "I mean seriously- right after a fucking mission?! And all I hear all night is 'plap, plap, plap-!"

• "that’s enough outta ye," Soap groans, forcefully covering your mouth as the three other men throw him a gaze of appreciation

• Price cleared his throat before apologizing to you, "that's on us, sweetheart. Apologies."

• You wave your hand, signaling it was ok.

• "that's why-!" you shoved Soap's hand away from your mouth, "I would like the single bedroom away from all your tom-fuckery."

• "Corporal." Price warns and you simply giggled, seeing as how Ghost shoulders' shook from that pun as well

• "I have to know tho…"

• "..what is it this time…" Gaz, given up and instead of prolonging it- simply straight up and asks you

• "you guys must have had a foursome once or twice right?"

• The embarrassing groans continue as they simply ignored you now, soap- done with your shenanigans- transferred to his mates' side and cozied up with them

• "'cause I swear- y'all were doing that groanin' shit at the same time way too often-!"

• "kitty is curious, ain't she?" Ghost stares as you, a smirk under his mask as he sees your ears grow red

• "'cause y'all do shit without me…"

• All of their eyes widen at the revelation

• "WAIIIIITTTTT- NOT IN THAT KIND OF WAY--"

• "kitty wants to play cap'n," Ghost chuckles, now strolling up to you menacingly as you feel the vibe in the room change

• "hmm, no wonder she stayed up all those times huh?" Price smirks, standing up as well as both look down on your red-faced form

• "how would she know about those times, right?" Ghost could just eat up your reaction, seeing as how affected you were by them

• "no!" you turned to Ghost the pointing to Price, "No! Not like that!" you crawled back to the seat as much as you could as they went closer and closer

• "I think its just like that luv," Gaz pipes in, leaning against Soap who appeared by Ghost's side, "complaining in such detail- how else would you know that much, hm?"

• You squired in your seat, even more so as you feel like being pinned down by their gazes

• Soap leans down and his breath on your neck makes the hair ends stand at attention

• "interested in how that foursome went, doll?"

• Hearing this, your face exploded and four had the gall to laugh and go back to their seats, now amused at how the tables have been turned on you

• "fuck off all of you!" you groaned, hiding your face in your knees as you pulled it up

• "don't like being jostled now do we?" Gaz snickers and you throw him a playful glare

• "I just connected the dots recently okay?! Most of what I said was made up anyways- I was knocked out like a light every after mission!" you complained and surprisingly, that shut them up…

• Looking up from your knees as to why they had suddenly became silent, you could see their cold sweats dripping

• "wait- my bullshit is real and y'all fuck with each other in a poly relationship??" you asked, now genuinely shocked

• "we thought you were being for real earlier…" Soap huffs, rubbing his neck as he now- definitely- couldn't make eye contact with you

• "it was on point, y'know?" Ghost hums, also avoiding eye contact with you

• Price clears his throat again, "we thought you knew sweetie," he looks at you again, even more so awkward of how you didn't know the whole time you were with them since the incident with Shepherd and Graves

• "shit!" you cursed, now embarrassed at yourself of not knowing at all when all the signs were coming together

• You slid to a kneeled position in front of your superiors and gave a deep bow in apology

• "I'm so sorry sirs! I should've known better!"

• "Hey, hey- no need to kneel," Gaz was immediately at your side, trying to lift you from your position

• "we're not in the army anymore pup." Soap smiles, doing the same as the two other simply chuckle at your shenanigans once more

• "it- its.. Ugh! Words, brain is farting right now," you pouted as you let the two carry you up by the armpits and situate you again on your seat, in front of the two while the other two flanked your sides, not letting go of your shaking hands

• "…'m sorry for joking about that.."

• "You're good, kit." Ghost nods, "not a sensitive topic for us."

• "Yes," Price sighs, "we're all comfortable with each other."

• "including me right?" you pointed at yourself, with your hand still interlaced with Soap who simply smiles at your naivety

• Price chuckles, "you wouldn't be here right now if you aren't." He confesses truthfully and you couldn't help but sigh in relief with a soft 'thank fuck,'-- to which both Gaz and Soap snickers at.

• "not that I want to intrude or anything!" you cleared up and Price looks at you confused, "- just wanted to know what y'all boundaries are and what y'all comfy with if we're gonna live together- for like, I don't know- forever??" you end up unsure, now confused of what your living plans would be with the four

• Clearly they had their own relationship and their own routines, how could you intrude on that intimate part of themselves?! You had to contact Lasswell right now--

• "Oi, stop overthinkin'." Ghost pushes the skin between your brows and you wake up from your internal rant to see the four around you again, albeit- less menacingly this time

• "Sweetheart." Price calls to you and grabs your hands in his, making you face him

• "You are fine, we don't mind having you with us."

• "we've been through the worst together, haven't we?" Soap adds on, agreeing with the sentiments of his captain and partner

• "pretty too late now to back out, luv." Gaz hums patting your shoulder with a reassured smile

• "but--"

• "no buts," Ghost covers your mouth as you deadpan at him, "you're fucking with us for the long haul."

• You groan, already feeling the migraine that's kicking in living with these four horndogs of a superiors.

• "just keep me out of the 'fucking' part."

They laugh at your plead, all in good fun

[spinjitsuburst]

ramble about ur favs i wanna hear abt ur thoughts -zaptrap

HAN’S INFODUMPING ABOUT JAY... START!!!!

so like sgdkdhdkdhd I say Jay and Lloyd are my “favorites” but honestly it’s so hard to pick favorites out of this skittles squad like I love EVERY character for a variety of different reasons. I was going to also infodump about Lloyd but then I started talking about Prime Empire and then this post got. Long. So. it's just Jay I may infodump about Lloyd another day especially since I'm very Conduit Brained Rn but yea yea!

this is long so i'm putting most of it under the cut so y'all don't kill me for making a huge long post

I considered putting Zane and Sora on here as well since I’d also consider them my “favs” but like this is already gonna be. A lot of. Infodumping (also i typed THIS part before I even started and decided not to yell about Lloyd because this already got long enough). Maybe I’ll make a separate post for those two hmm hmm much to consider but for now MY (technically) FAVORITE NINJAGO CHARACTER: JAY WALKER

THE SPARKPLUG WHO INVADED MY BRAIN LIKE A PARASITE

so hey his name is a pun this makes me laugh ridiculously hard every time I remember he is named. After a misdemeanor HSKSHDKFH

Jay is such an interesting case of a character for me because I started out the show not liking him. Which is. Stares at my entire account I think my feelings have changed somewhat

Jay starts out as an asshole I don’t think anyone can disagree with me there (although honestly they’re all assholes in early ninjago they bullied a ten year old and left him dangling several feet off the ground) but over the course of the show you can see him start developing into a much more interesting character. He goes from being so insecure he's faking everything about himself to someone who knows who he is and is so genuine about it

now yea we could argue about whether his character was too uwu-ified post-season 10 but this is the FUN HAN POST SO WE'RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT THAT the point is you can SEE the growth that Jay has gone through and I am going to show you that growth through what I call

✨ The Skybound to Prime Empire Effect ✨

I AM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT THE IDEA THAT PRIME EMPIRE WAS WRITTEN TO BE A DIRECT PARALLEL OF SKYBOUND AND WAS CENTERED ON SHOWING HOW THE NINJA ESPECIALLY JAY HAVE GROWN THROUGHOUT THE SEASON

when season 12 rolls around we are at the point in Jay's development where he is CONFIDENT in who he is. He's a fun-loving jokester with the power of lightning and the drive to help people whenever he can. He uses jokes and humor to help alleviate tension and get people through whatever's happening. And when on his own what does he do?

BECOME AN ENTERTAINER BABEY

i like to think jay's club in prime empire was a safe haven for anyone stuck in the game who figured out hey. we Can't Leave and felt freaked about it. Also Jay would generally try and spread the word that hey something ISN'T RIGHT HERE which would lead people to want to stay with him

(totally plugging my friend's fic but this kind of thing is explored in would you like to enter prime empire by @finn-m-corvex y'all should check it out cool cool)

also the prime empire shorts which i watched all of in the midst of typing this video cuz i love them go watch them please please please jay was publically fighting the red visors which I imagine may have raised some red flags for some players

THIS SOMEHOW TURNED INTO PRIME EMPIRE INFODUMPING LMAO ANYWAYS Jay's confident! He becomes an entertainer because it's who he knows he is! And it's something that will get people hyped and having fun, which is very in-character for Jay to do! He uses those kinds of things to mask the Bad Things going on and get people remembering what's good

I've talked about this sort of thing before but that's Jay's whole philosophy as early as season 9! Which is a DIRECT contrast to how he views it in season 6, as Nadakhan puts it scarily accurately

"You make jokes to mask the fact that you're afraid"

(i was gonna grab a screenshot for that like i did with the hunted scene but netflix has bloCKED THE ABILITY TO TAKE SCREENSHOTS THE WAY I USED TO and i don't have them already and i'm too lazy to grab them from elsewhere so alas trust me he says it)

making jokes to hide your fear and using humor to remind yourself of what's good and coping with the bad are two VERY different outlooks on it

so I think this outlook is what drives him to make this glamrock persona in the first place - this is a bad situation, one he's in with other civilians, and what better way to keep him and themself safe until the others get there than throwing a big performance at a safe place!

also it's just so gender okay I want to look like Superstar Rockin' Jay so badly

it's also interesting to see his outlook on his parents change over time! In season six he finds out Ed and Edna aren't his birth parents and feels upset about it, not understanding why his birth parents would've abandoned him. In season twelve, that outlook changing is EXACTLY why Jay's able to get through to Unagami

"I was abandoned by my parents, too!... I never understood why, and I never had the chance to even ask. But I always hoped there was a good reason. What if there's a reason?"

(again curse you netflix i wanted SCREENSHOTS whatever whatever)

It's this scene that gets Unagami to calm down long enough for Milton Dyer to get there, and presumably is what stops him from just. Flattening him and Jay like a pancake.

to piggyback off of this i absolutely adore how Unagami and Jay consider each other adopted brothers in that one book I still haven't read and I hope he's in Dragons Rising at some point Unagami is my favorite "villain" (no longer a villain) in the whole show he deserves more screentime

like this is where i found out about this and it's plagued my mind ever since. i need to read. this book just for them

SO YEA OKAY Prime Empire is "Who is Jay as a Person Post-Skybound" to me also it opens up so many fascinating things about Jay. I rest my case

so backpedaling a little bit. JAY CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HIS PARENTS GUYS IT'S SO SOFT AND I'M sobs

like yea the first episode with Ed and Edna in it has Jay avoiding them like the plague but this gets explained very easily when you remember he was bullied for his home life before he became a ninja. It makes a lot more sense why he wouldn't want them around his new friends, assuming they'd react the same way. Also how was he supposed to know literally all the rest of the groups parents were either dead, presumed dead, or had a toxic relationship with their kid lmao

(Cole calling his mom kills me. Cole's mom is dead. I know they probably just didn't think that far ahead when writing the dialogue but it's so funny mans pretended to call his dead mom to get on Jay for not appreciating his parents iconic behavior)

anyways literally every episode Ed and Edna are central to (except like the one in skybound) Jay stops at nothing to protect his parents and it means the absolute world to me he's so much like them!! They raised an inventive little nerd and he will stop at nothing to make sure they're safe and it's. It's SO IMPORTANT TO ME OKAY

ALSO this is an excuse to clip my favorite piece of dialogue possibly in the entire show. Except Netflix won't let me now. So you just get the text dialogue

Jay's just fallen from the sky with a messed up eye and is incredibly distraught that all his friends are captured. And his dad just. The woRLD IS FALLING APART AND HE'S EATIN' SOUP-

Ed i love you

anyways

anways anyways this just turned into me rambling about prime empire and then Ed and Edna and a lot of disjointed other stuff but thank you for this opportunity i was going to also ramble about lloyd but i put this post in a word count and

yea i think that's enough for a tumblr post anyways! If anyone wants any like. More logically thought out and direct thoughts about characters feel free to send me asks this was fun thank u @zaptrap for this opportunity to scream about jay

[kazutora-kurokawa]

It Wasn't Me! (A fic about Mikey's dorayaki getting stolen while some of Toman's founders are hanging out)

♡ SFW, use of nicknames, cursing, mentions of arson, false accusations/Mikey blaming everyone for stealing, set in an au where Shinichiro survives Kazutora hitting him and everything is peachy keen between the founders, just a random idea that popped in my head ♡

Characters: Mikey, Draken, Kazutora, Mitsuya, Takemichi

Mentions of: Pah-Chin, Baji, and Shinichiro

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Mitsuya sat on the couch in the corner of Toman's hideout, scribbling away in his design journal before noticing something strange. "Draken?" Draken looked up from the book he was reading. "Yea Suya? What is it?" "Isn't it oddly quiet?" "You know what, now that you mention it, it is-" "WHO TOOK IT?" Mikey's voice reverberated throughout the hideout, interrupting Draken mid-sentence.

"I knew it was too good to be true." Mitsuya closed his journal and placed it on the couch before getting up to go with Draken to investigate Mikey's sudden outburst. "What's wrong now Mikey?" "I'll tell you what's wrong! There's a thief in our midst!" "What got stolen?" The boys turned around, surprised by Kazutora's sudden appearance. "What the fuck Tora, you scared the hell outta us! Where did you even come from?

"I was just out riding around on my bike, I needed to clear my head. So...is anybody gonna say what got stolen or is it a guessing game?" Draken and Mitsuya turned back to face Mikey, awaiting his response. "What got stolen is my dorayaki. Some scoundrel came in here and got their dirty hands on it!" "Are you fucking serious right now? I'm sitting back down, this is just ridiculous." "That's what you were yelling about? I promise you it's not that serious." "Yes it is! Takemitchy-kun brought it for me earlier and I was planning on eating it right now, but I obviously can't cause it's gone!" "It's not like you're gonna die without it, just relax."

"What do you mean relax? I can't relax with a thief running around!" "Well who do you think stole it?" "Pah hasn't been here, so you can rule him out." Draken yelled from the couch. "You know what? It was probably Baji, he does illegal stuff all the time." "Mikey you can't just go around accusing people who aren't here to defend themselves." "Exactly, you're basically just slandering him." "He literally lights cars on fire, can you really blame me for suspecting someone with a criminal record?" "I hate to admit it, but he's got a point."

"Oh shut up Draken!" "Okay let's calm it down a bit. Mikey, I think you're placing the blame on Baji because you're too lazy to actually do any detective work." Mikey crossed his arms and stared sheepishly at the ground. Mitsuya was right, no matter how much Mikey wished he wasn't. "Okay fine, I admit that I'm lazy. I guess Baji didn't do it." As the words left his mouth, Mikey looked up in sudden realization. "If it wasn't him, then it must've been one of you!"

"Oh that's just fantastic, are we gonna be playing the blame game all day? Why the hell would we steal your dorayaki? "I don't know, maybe to piss me off." "Well I don't have any reason to wanna piss you off and I was enjoying the peace and quiet, so I definitely wouldn't steal anything from you knowing you'd have an outburst." "I'm with Suya on this one, nobody wants to hear your damn mouth while they're trying to read."

Mikey turned his attention towards Kazutora, loading up his accusation. "Then it must've been you Kazutora!" "I literally just got here like 10 minutes ago dumbass, how could I steal it?" "I don't know, but I need someone to blame!" "Hey guys, what's up?" Takemichi wandered through the door of the hideout, oblivious to the situation plaguing his friends. "And the plot thickens." "Nothing much Takemichi, just Mikey blaming everyone for stealing his dorayaki." "I haven't blamed everyone, just you guys." "You say that as if it makes it any better." "Dorayaki? You mean the one I brought for you?" "Yes and someone snatched it up!"

Takemichi just stood there and laughed awkwardly, giving the boys a chance to notice the bag he held in his hand. "Takemichi, that wouldn't happen to be Mikey's dorayaki in that bag would it?" "Yeah it is, he forgot to grab it before he left." "Wow, so he really just accused everyone for no reason. That's crazy." "Mikey you owe all of us an apology."

Feeling guilty and embarrassed at his own behavior, Mikey shuffled his way over to Takemichi, taking the bag out of his hand. "Thanks Takemitchy." Mikey turned around and faced the guys, who were actively expecting an apology. "Guys..." Mikey took a long pause before continuing. "I'm not sorry." He walked out the door, too stubborn to admit he was wrong.

"I wish I would've hit him with those bolt cutters instead of Shinichiro."

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Taglist

@arlerts-angel @i-literally-cant-with-this @trevengersprincess @giugiette @katkitkats @happy-trenchcoated-impala @rindousbabyg

[bl00dlight]

In your most recent ask you spoke about how Ewan said Aemond has the code to be able to walk out on people thus he wouldn't allow himself to be vulnerable/being loved can't help him. But I also have to remind you that Ewan also said that Alicent would be the exception to that code, he wouldn't be able to walk out on her for example, and he also said, and I quote; "I think that's the only way you can beat Aemond, is with love." So I'd argue that saying he'd refuse to be loved or refuse to be genuinely close to someone isn't quite correct. Because talking about show Aemond, I think Ewan has been making it quite clear that Aemond would be willing to be close to people who care for him. All I'm saying is that I don't think things are so black and white, I think Aemond, the one from the show at least, would be able and willing to form connections.

I mean yes, no I agree. I said that he'd be able to form connections.

But I think what Ewan meant by that quote isn't "you can fix Aemond with love." It's that you can BEAT Aemond with love. Those are two separate ideas. What Ewan meant was, in that context of him saying that was to do with why he kicked Alicent out of the council room. Which I talk about, and Ewan talks about Aemond not wanting Alicent in the room because she MAKES him vunerable/emotional. And Aemond doesn't want to feel those things, he doesn't want to be put in a position of weakness. He is a character defined by fear. And for him genuine vunerablity = fear.

What Ewan meant is, you can dampen his worst impulses with love. But you can't make him feel more secure with love. Because love makes him feel vunerable aka beaten/weak. Love doesn't mean you'd fix him. Because what happens when you trigger his insecurities? What happens when you do what Alicent and Helaena both do and point out he is violent/cruel?

I think it's a deeply unrealistic idea to frame Aemond as basically, he'd call the whole thing off, this entire personality would go from violent, power hungry, controlling etc

To loving family man - if he is just given some love/care/affection.

He literally PAYS the Madame to do that exact thing and still walks out on her. Because she means nothing to him. He was confessing something which is MASSIVELY vunerable - that he feels guilty for Lucerys - he exposes himself completely to her; yet feels nothing for her. He can just abandon her. Which is Ewan says is Aemonds philosophy. Don't get attached. You can't get hurt if you're not attached.

“Don’t let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.” That’s the code his character utilizes so he’s able to maneuver around this world without getting caught by Al Pacino."

But unless you were his family members (the ones he actually cares about) Unless you were Alicent and Helaena - he'd be using you as a substitute. Which Ewan also talks about Aemond finding substitutes for that love he so desperately wants. A substitute is not the same thing.

He hasn't exactly been very kind to Alicent has he? When she puts her hands on him he pushes them away after he told her to go back to 'domestic pursuits'. He has trash talked her all season, called her weak.

I think in season 1, yea. His character would be more willing to be close to others: but his character was in a place of greater stablity.

But season 2 is a whole different story. He is like 18 years old and has experienced an unbelievable amount of trauma in the span of a few months. And now? All the stablity he once has is completely gone. Remember, trauma is something that pulls you further and further down into your worst impulses. Why? Because it's a survival reflex. Aemond in s2 has lost ALLLLLLL the love/stablity he once had with his mother/family. Which again, was already very dysfunctional anyway. But it was managed. And Aemond wasn't in a position of power like he now is.

Alicent tries to be close with him.

I don't think you've quite interpreted what I was saying, I wasn't saying Aemond would refuse love/care - in fact I have a whole section discussing how that's exactly what he wants. Only it wouldn't be a functional idea of love and care for the person who was giving it to him.

The ask was specifically asking me how I think he'd behave in a relationship where he is loved and cared for. And I said... well exactly how he behaves with Alicent and Helaena (who both do love and care for him).

I mean, if you want to take Alys for an example - we don't really know what their relationship was like or the dynamic. But just from the fact in the books there was clearly, a romantic element to it - Aemond isn't fixed. He gets worse. He grows more violent, more wrathful, more vengeful. He kills and destroys everything around him whenever he feels the slightest bit threatened or insulted.

And if we apply that to show Aemond? Well... yea makes sense. Alys would just be another substitute. He can siphon what he wants as long as he has power. He can let you get close as long as you never threaten him, as long as he never starts to feel like he might be vunerable in the relationship.

As I said - I never said Aemond can't form connections. He can and he does. I said those connections wouldn't be stable. Put it this way, Alicent is Aemond's greatest vunerablity. And he treats her like shit now that she has turned away from him.

How could a man who has never been shown unconditional love? Ever express that? I don't think I'm being black and white. I think it's actually more black and white to interpret what Ewan said as equalling Aemond is easily fixed with love. Because it's not what he said. He said he is BEATEN by it.

And what does Aemond not want? To be beaten. He doesn't want to feel vunerable or weak. So why would he lean into that if he feels he is going to be beaten? And why would he distance himself from Alicent to the point of stripping her from her only power - if it wasn't for the fact that his love for her makes him feel vunerable?

It's black and white to think Aemond is uncomplicated enough that he would just change his entire way of being for love.

He wouldn't. Love threatens him. It beats him.

And the only way to negate any of that would be to basically give in to whatever he wanted, whenever he wants. To have no power, never complain if he mistreated you or others etc.

Again, S1 proves that even with the stablity of his family - he still lashes out towards others. You're forgetting that Aemond wasn't just hurt by Alicent. He was hurt by HIS ENTIRE FAMILY. His brother, his nephews, his cousins, his half-sister, his father. They all neglected him/bullied him etc. This man would not trust anyone lmao. And he literally doesn't we see that time and time again.

Alicent was the only one who ever stood up for him. He is attached to her.

And Helaena too, Helaena has likely never questioned him before or made him feel bad. They share an affinity for being the outsiders so she has only ever made him feel comforted most likely.

It's not until Alicent and Helaena turn away from him - that he fucken loses it on them. Okay Alicent was rightfully upset with Aemond in episode 1 of s2 for killing Luke and he has been hating on her ever since?

Aemond literally assaults Helaena when she refuses the idea that she would help him kill people.

Yea, you could get "close" to him - but my whole post was that being close to him wouldn't be you were exempt from his abuse. And any love/care he feels for you wouldn't be something he LEANS into unconditionally. Because his ego/his wounds are bigger than just that. It's not black and white to see that.... any connection with him would be dysfunctional.

I explicitly stated he is absolutely capable of love and care and connection. But my whole post was about the fact... it would be a nightmare and wouldn't be how you think of love/care/connection. We are talking about a man who has more power then like... well, in a sense he's the equivalent to a billionaire with a nuke - who also rules the world. Oh and also he has been abused and traumatised.

There is a zero percent chance he would form healthy attachments/connections.

[incorrectelswordquotes]

Do you remember when the job progression quests had dialogue cutscenes and difficult quests? Each town had its own gear and you'd have to drop blue-background items to upgrade it. And it was character-specific too. Ice statues had to be crafted, and the ingredients would just pile up in your inventory. There was Unique equipment for every region you had a chance to drop after a boss battle, and it'd be shown in the chat. Plant Overlord's accessory was the top trending thing. Rena was blonde and did a flip when she double jumped. The first field introduced was the one between Hamel and Velder. The level cap was 40 and it was *hard* to get there.

I sure don't miss a lot of this stuff, but looking back, it feels like a wholly different game.

i played around when the game was still like this for the most part, except the level cap at the time was 70? and then over time it jumped to 90 but my middle-school/high-school ass couldn't keep up. actually, i remember seeing the new UI the game has for the health bars and that was already enough to throw me off. not that it looks bad, but i remember seeing this UI for the longest time:

vs this:

like as much as i miss the one i got acquainted with, this new one is a lot simpler and cleaner? yet it retains that cartoony vibe with the slanted bars so thats neat. and then there's THIS:

i'll admit i havent played during this era but man this looks busy af. it was simple yea, but something feels off about it. like i love the look here too but it kinda clashes colors-wise. there's not too much of a difference between the original UI and the one after it but i could tell it needed slimming down.

while i was gone i also learned that the previous privately-hosted server VoidEls was shut down but was eventually replaced by another, which is fair enough i guess.

"Each town had its own gear and you'd have to drop blue-background items to upgrade it. And it was character-specific too."

this was both cool and annoying, for me personally at least. it's cool in that every town having gear gave you a way to progress before getting even stronger gear. sort of like a jumping-off point for every town you got to as they handed you their own version of stuff you could use. and you could emulate their aesthetic by wearing their gear. the annoying part is that constantly switching gear means item management is necessary to prevent your inventory from maxing out, and not every item looked good on you. if you didn't have skins? tough luck. (my memory might be wrong here so please correct me if i messed something up)

"...job progression quests had dialogue cutscenes and difficult quests?"

THEY GOT RID OF THOSE!? maybe im jaded but as a writer, i liked seeing the player-characters' personal struggle as they progressed through a job-specific mission. those short cutscenes let us see what they're really like. even if some of the requirements really were trash. i still remember spamming the same dungeon over and over hoping for a quest drop (or multiple) so i can move on. but after hearing the story was consolidated to be one singular, linear path regardless of who you played, maybe they streamlined the job class progression system too?

update: yea it seems you still have to spam dungeons to upgrade to Master Class but it looks less tedious than before for previous class ranks.

"Plant Overlord's accessory was the top trending thing."

boss accessories were the bane of my existence so this makes sense. it seems like it's unobtainable, as many overworld zones and dungeons have since been removed based on what i just looked up

im assuming Plant Overlord isn't fightable anymore or only shows up in some elite zone now so rip

"Rena was blonde and did a flip when she double jumped."

i didn't know this. in fact when i checked her wiki page, the change was because her hair wasn't green enough despite her class art showing her as having green-hued hair.

speaking of the wiki,

holy fucking shit thats a lot of classes

[a-kaash-me-outside]

not fair - ch5

in which your boyfriend is perfect in every single way... except for one and kei can't just sit back and watch you suffer...

previous | ch5 | next (coming soon) [masterlist]

// "don’t question me again or i’ll leave." ~ ᴛsᴜᴋɪsʜɪᴍᴀ ᴋᴇɪ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ x ʏᴀᴍᴀɢᴜᴄʜɪ ᴛᴀᴅᴀsʜɪ ~ 8656 ᴡᴏʀᴅs

a look into this chapter/tw: 18+ minors dni super nfsw!, cheating (seriously, major plot point), threesome, vouyerism, size kink, weird feelings, use of character first names, degradation, oral f!receive, dom/sub undertones, coming untouched, stop light system, dirty talk, name calling, coming twice, plot-heavy, pegging, cross posted from ao3, afab reader she/her pronouns

join my taglist here!! ~~ (one more chapter left?!?!?!) ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

It’s one of those phone calls that you hope goes to voicemail. 

Hey, Tadashi, just wanted to let you know that Kei and I were coming to get the car and boxes tomorrow. Sorry it’s been there for so long. That’s all it had to be. You’re repeating it in your head, waiting for the polite message and tone to come. 

It doesn’t.

You don’t remember what Tadashi says when he answers the phone, don’t even know if he said anything at all. You pull the phone away from your ear, making sure that he didn’t answer and hang up or that the space between the rings isn’t just skipping. The numbers are counting up, seemingly slower than seconds typically pass by. 

“Hey, Tadashi,” you start. You should have practiced or wrote a script or something, because any words, phrases, questions in your mind are gone now, leaving Tadashi to pick up the pieces once again.

If it weren’t for the tiny breath from the otherside of the phone, you might’ve hung up waiting for a response. He mutters your name first, practically lost by the hestiance and heaviness of the word. “Are you calling about coming to pick up your car?”

“Right, yea, I’m so sorry we left it there and haven’t, uh, been back to get it. We kinda just wanted to give you time because of everything and didn’t want to, yknow, rush anything or give you any trouble or-” you’re rambling on, nervous to stop. Kei rests his hand on your lower back just to let you know that he’s there. 

“It’s fine, really, just, are you guys coming to pick it up?” he asks, interrupting your nervous spiel.

“Yes,” you reply, knowing that you have so much more to say, but not ready to say any of it. After being so intimate with him and Kei, you’d think that it would be easier to talk, like everything’s already been out on the table. It’s not until Kei raises his eyebrows, lets his thumb graze under your shirt and against your skin that you actually get the words out. “Do you think we could come in, too?”

Tadashi isn’t stupid. He has to know what you’re implying or, at the very least, know that the two of you want to talk with him. Kei is staring at you, the room is dead silent, and every second that Tadashi doesn’t answer is more confirmation that you’ve just made a fool of yourself. 

You’re about to take it back, to backpedal without remorse in an attempt to salvage civility, but Tadashi clears his throat, unknowingly interrupting you. “Yeah, that would be okay.” 

Almost too stunned to speak, you’re sure that the surprise was written across your face. “O-Okay, yeah.” It’s heavy in your throat, banging at the back of your teeth, you want to ask, clarify, make sure that you’re on the same page, but you also feel like you should quit while you’re ahead. Kei’s confusion turns to understanding when you give him a wide-eyed, short nod. 

“Alright,” Tadashi replies, but still doesn’t hang up. 

Tsukishima doesn’t grab the phone from you, but he talks loud enough for his voice to make it through the receiver. “Like last time?” 

“Like last time,” Tadashi confirms quickly. “I’ve gotta go, but I’ll see you guys tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah, for sure, see you then,” you reply, “Looking forward to it, Dashi.” You can faintly hear the hitch in his breath followed by the low clear of his throat. 

“Me too.” Click.

You bring the phone down from your ear. The weight on your chest isn’t as unbearable with the assumptions off the table. There’s still a lingering force quickening your heartbeat, but at least you can breathe for now. 

“Thanks,” you say, looking up at Kei.

He shrugs. “That’s what I’m here for, bluntness.”

“And doing the hard things that I can’t,” you scoff. 

He bends down, pressing a kiss onto your forehead and pushing your hair out of your face. “Definitely not all the time. It’s probably like half and half,” Kei says and then tilts his head, “Mm, maybe 60/40.”

You nod, “Yeah, but that seems pretty fair to me.” You pull back, wiping your palms on your pants. “I should bring the thing, right?”

“Why else did we buy it?”

“No, I know, I guess I’m just nervous,” you admit.

“No reason to be. You’ll be great and Tadashi will love it, you know that,” Kei reassures you. 

In theory, you did know that. If you really thought about it, you knew that. The evidence backs it up, the reciprocation in excitement backs it up, and yet you can’t help but doubt the ideas that have been swarming your head since that night. 

The entire walk to Tadashi’s feels heavy, steps dragging, bag weighted, Kei’s hand in yours evident. So many thoughts are taking place in your head. You try to rid them, but you can’t. The conversation from that night is on repeat in your mind. Maybe it’s a good thing, maybe it’ll make you more decisive, maybe the repetition will hammer in these clouded thoughts. 

You thought that the first time coming back felt weird, but coming back the second time comes with a mix of eerie comfort and looming taboo. 

It’s a blur, really, Tadashi answering the door, inviting you inside. You remember the small things like taking off your shoes and placing them neatly next to the spot that you used to every single day and when you shake your head no at Tadashi politely asking if you want a glass of water or cup of tea. The rest of it is lost, second to the anticipation and the thought in the back of your mind to book it out the front door.

You are sitting on the couch. Kei is sitting next to you. Somehow everything in your head is talking at once and they’re your thoughts, but you can’t make out a single one. 

You want to just skip to the part of the night that doesn’t feel like this anymore - fidgeting just to calm your nerves, the three of you sitting in a small circle like a meeting with stale coffee, no eye contact, barely allowing yourself to breathe. Kei’s hand hovers over to yours, slowly, trying not to bring attention to itself, not for his sake or even Tadashi’s, but for yours. His grasp wraps around your fidgeting fingers, his intertwining with yours like they were meant to be there. 

In a matter of seconds, you catch Tadashi’s eyes as they flicker from the intertwined hands in your lap to your eyes back to your hands and then down at his own. You can’t get a long enough look at his face to see the emotion, but you don’t really need a long look to tell you that Tadashi is feeling more nervous than you are now, as if that’s even possible.

How hard would this have been without Kei sitting here right next to you? Without Kei throughout this entire process? Tadashi doesn’t have that, doesn’t get the sweet hand hold or the supportive presence. He deserves it, though. 

You take the first step, hands shaking, breath unsteady as you stand up and move towards Tadashi. You don’t know what to say once you are right in front of him, so you opt for silence. Instead, you take this time to regulate your breathing and focus on the emotions in Tadashi’s face that you couldn’t find before.

All of the doubt that you had last night (and a few seconds ago, for that matter) is fading away. Now that he’s sitting here in front of you, now that you can see the soft features on his face, can feel Kei’s assuring presence behind you, can watch the way that Tadashi waits for your next sentence, patient and attentive. Your hand moves slowly as you reach to cup Tadashi’s face, directing his attention and testing the waters. 

Banging against your sternum, your heart feels like it’s going to burst out of your chest. It doesn’t calm on contact or when Tadashi leans into the touch ever so slightly and it gets much worse when the words tumble out of your mouth. You can’t help them, seeing how pretty Tadashi looks in front of you, getting flashbacks from last week, remembering how good he was for you.

“Can I kiss you?”

You don't know if this sentence takes Kei by surprise, don’t dare to look back or show an ounce of hesitation in front of Tadashi. Besides, at this moment, you’re more concerned about Tadashi, the way you can see the emotions clearly now, but you still can’t read them very well for the sake of how fast they’re changing. But you can read the nod, though slight, of Tadashi’s head after a beat of contemplation. 

The kiss is sweet, warm. You have to bend down a bit more than you’re anticipating, but that only means you get to tilt his head up, bring his lips closer to yours, thumb gently pushing on the underside of his chin, fingers resting against his neck in a way that you can feel his harsh swallow as soon as you pull away. His eyes are wide, struck with something bordering wonderment, and you are drinking it in. 

This has to be exactly what Kei felt like on the night that started it all. 

There’s a surge of confidence for the first time since your last visit, like it’s no longer testing the waters, because you know exactly why the three of you are here. You’re not sure that Tadashi knows, but somehow that makes you feel even more assured, like he’s depending on you to guide him through the night. 

And it really does feel like history repeating itself.

Still, it doesn’t matter how much you see yourself in Tadashi right now and how that means that if he is you then you would be Kei and how you know that if Kei were standing where you’re standing right now, things would unfold a lot differently. Despite the lingering pressure of this new role you’re embodying, you have to ask.

It comes out sweet, warm like the kiss you shared moments ago. “You’re okay with all of this?”

Tadashi’s nod is a touch more certain than the previous, but you follow it up nonetheless. “And it’s alright that I don’t keep asking if it’s alright?” you ask. He nods again. “If something is getting too much or you’re starting to feel uncomfortable, just say yellow.” God, saying it aloud brings you back. You remember that Kei had started touching you, kissing you at this point, but all you want to do is stare at Tadashi, see the understanding and attention. “If something is too much and you want to stop immediately, then say red and we’ll stop, make sure you’re okay.” 

He nods again, but not one curt nod like the rest of them, more desperate, repetitive, like he wants you to stop talking, not because he doesn’t care, but because he knows what’s ahead and he wants it to come faster. You give in, moving your hand down his shoulder, leaning in to press your lips against his ear. “If you can’t breathe, mouth full, can’t verbally communicate, just 3 nice hard taps against me or Kei and we’ll stop.”

A whimper slips out from between his teeth in lieu of a nod, but you want to hear it in stumbling confirmation. “Understand?” mhm “Say it. Need to hear you say it, Dashi.” 

“Yea- I mean, yea, yes. I understand.”

You stand up straight, towering over top of Tadashi. “I’m in control tonight.” You’re not sure how Kei looks behind you, taller than you, you know that, but you wonder if his height makes you look less in control than you feel. You wonder if his facial expression is making Tadashi doubt your dominance over the situation. You didn’t really talk about this, Kei and you, not in detail, not about power dynamics. Truthfully, if you had, you’re not sure you would be in this position right now.

It’s comfortable for you to be right between Kei and Tadashi in the order of power, but to declare that you’re in control, not just of Tadashi, but just in general, it’s stepping out of your comfort zone. 

“Y-You?” Tadashi asks innocently enough, eyes flitting from you to just behind you where you know that Kei is standing. Part of you, the safe part, wants to quiet down, wait for Kei to answer for you, to either protect you or scoff at the notion. That part of you doesn’t win. 

Rather, you bend down again, eyes level with Tadashi’s. “If that’s a problem, I can leave instead.”

“No, it’s not- I’m not- I didn’t- I’m sorry!” he starts immediately.

“Don’t question me again or I’ll leave,” you repeat. 

“I won’t. I won’t.” Tadashi says, not a promise, but you believe it like one. 

You turn around, look up at Kei. There’s still that voice inside of you looking for his permission, for his approval. You don’t think that will ever go away. This little voice inside of you comes through in the form of a silent question. If it were anyone else on the receiving end you’d think it’d get lost in translation. Am I doing okay?

“What do you want me to do?” Kei asks plainly, unwavering, like it’s not completely left field for him to be asking you for direction. It’s the perfect answer to your question. 

You’re not exactly sure how you’re going to get through this night. You’re exhausted already and you haven’t even really given a command yet. You figure, however, that the best mantra to get you through the night is to just continue to ask for things that you really want. What do you want him to do? 

You go with your first instinct and though your voice isn’t as strong as you want it to be, it feels good leaving your mouth. “I want you to carry me upstairs, want Tadashi to follow. And I want to be placed nicely on the bed.”

Kei moves immediately, hoisting you up and letting you wrap your arms around his neck. There’s no hesitance to just doing what he’s told. You assume, for now at least, that it’s because the tasks aren’t too demanding or degrading. You’ll be waiting for backlash for the rest of the night. 

You don’t have to direct any of the demands to Tadashi. He hears you and he listens, waiting just enough time to give you a breath of space and then following you like a puppy. By the time Tadashi enters the room, Kei is placing you, exactly as you asked, nice and gentle on the bed. 

It’s so much different than normal. Kei is always attentive, always makes sure that you’re taken care of, but it’s so different . His hands follow your body as he lies you down, making sure that there is a cushion of his palm between each inch and the bed as it comes in contact. God, you wish you could feel it on your skin. 

“Am I allowed to kiss you?” Kei asks. You can’t detect any amount of snide smirk or tone, have to take it as sincere despite months and months of experiences screaming in your head. Your stomach is in knots and you want to say yes just because he asked, but making him wait feels like it’ll have a better payoff in the end. 

“Not yet,” you say, low like a whisper. It’s not loud enough for Tadashi to hear, not meant to show your dominance or prove yourself. It’s a moment just for you and Kei. His eyebrows raise and then furrow, a remark starts to bubble, but he shuts it down before it reaches his throat. You don’t know where Tadashi is, but you don’t care either. You’re following your wants, pushing your fingertips through Kei’s blonde locks and making soft fists. “I want you to want it more.”

You let go quickly, as soon as it’s about to elicit a response, and then you press on his shoulders with the heel of your palm, digging your fingernails into the tops just hard enough for him to really feel it . As soon as he’s stood up, standing at the foot of the bed, so familiarly over top of you, you ask, “Aren’t you going to ask me what else I want?”

He swallows the alternative response and asks just that, “What do you want now, (y/n)?”

You hook your fingers into your waistband. Both Kei’s and Tadashi’s eyes follow the movement as you push your shorts and panties down to your ankles. They’re still dangling off of one of your ankles after you maneuver one foot out of one side, spreading your legs apart and realizing just how bold you’re being tonight. 

You hadn’t realized, though, how wet you had gotten from just a few small actions. It was a mix of the newfound control and the way that they were both listening to you so well. It was the possibilities of tonight and how Kei, right now, was about to do whatever came out of your mouth. 

“I want you to eat me out,” you say. You could’ve stopped there, short and sweet, but the words tumble out and you don’t regret them one bit, “Want you to say please and thank you. You don’t do that very often.” Kei’s jaw tightens, but he doesn’t talk back.

“And I want Tadashi to watch,” you say to Kei and then turn to face Tadashi, “I want you to watch. Like last time.” You glance down to the small tent in Tadashi’s pants, let your eyes linger as an added explanation. “Just like last time. Do you understand?” Your tone is a mixture, a condescending softness. 

Tadashi lifts his hand, brings it steadily down to his bulge, but hesitates before touching himself through the fabric. “Now?” he asks. 

You give a small laugh, “The show hasn’t even started yet, but yes, if you’re that desperate.” 

You don’t know how quickly Tadashi is to start to touch himself because Kei hooks his arms underneath your legs and pulls your pussy against his mouth in one motion. You keep repeating to yourself that you’re in control. You have to keep reminding yourself or you would, probably instantaneously, slip back into doing whatever Kei wanted you to do.

Actually, even while you’re repeating to yourself that you’re in control, every part of you wants to close your eyes, lay back, and just let Kei do whatever he wants to do, and you know that tonight is all about what you want, but this is a once in a lifetime experience and you’re going to take advantage of it. You grab a fistful of Kei’s hair, pulling his head away from you in a way that surprises both of you.

“Say please.” It’s not nearly as cocky and confident and strong as you want it to be. In fact, it’s followed by an airy laugh from yourself because it’s so out of place. “Kei, baby, say please.”

“Please.” It’s not nearly as pleasing and desperate and appreciative as you want it to be. You cock your head. 

“That doesn’t sound like you really want to eat me out,” you furrow your eyebrows. You tighten your fist in his hair. “So say please.”

His eyes widen and he groans at your harsh grip, “Please, can I eat you out?”

“I still feel like you don’t really want to taste me, baby. I feel like you don’t want to bury your face in between my legs and eat me until I come all over your face.” You’re talking down to him now and the confidence is building in your chest as you watch his facial expressions shift. His mouth is basically watering. “I know you want that, so why don’t you ask really nicely and maybe I’ll let you.”

The pleasing, desperate, appreciative tone that you wanted is there and, with it, a bit of embarrassment to have to ask for something you usually beg for. “I- Please, can I please eat you out? I want to taste you and eat you, please.” His voice is more timid than you’ve ever heard it and it’s making your stomach flutter more than how close he is to you.

“You’re gonna make me come all over your pretty face, aren’t you?” you ask, slowly pulling his face towards your pussy. He’s moving with you, mouth opening as he gets centimeters away, but you stop him. “I asked you a question.”

“Yes,” he nods, trying to finish the motion and bury his face in between your legs.

“Yes what?”

“Yes, I’m going to make you come,” he mumbles. You can see just how much he wants to skip this part, but you’re having so much fun.

“Where am I going to come?” you smirk.

“All over my face,” Kei answers, knowing full well he’s not giving you the answer that you want.

“All… over… your…,” you say slowly, tilting his face upwards to look you directly in the eyes, watching the warmth spread across his features.

“Gonna make you come all over my pretty face,” Kei finally finishes.

“Now say please,” you tease.

“Please,” he says quickly.

“Pretty please?” you push on.

“Pretty please, fuck, (y/n), please let me eat you out. Please. I need to fucking eat you out. I need to feel your come on my tongue, need to taste it, need to please you and feel your thighs against my cheeks. Pretty please,” he spews, hoping that this time he actually gets to do what he’s been wanting to do since he knelt between your legs.

The last thing he sees before being pulled into your pussy is your huge smile. “Good boy, see, that wasn’t too hard.”

Between your legs, Kei has some ounce of control. He knows exactly what he’s doing and how to make you squirm and even though he had to say please a million times to get here and will have to stop when you say stop and follow your orders as you give them, until then, he gets to do whatever he wants. 

There’s no teasing, no build up. You’re so wet, dripping from teasing him and the control you felt with Tadashi. Kei doesn’t let a drop go to waste, running the flat of his tongue between your lips and prodding at your hole with the tip of his tongue. He doesn’t want to waste another second without his tongue deep inside of your tight little hole.

He fucks his tongue in and out of you, pressing his face as hard into you as he can in an attempt to get his tongue so deep inside you. You help as much as you can, both hands at the back of his head, pulling and tugging at his hair, clawing at his neck and back and as far down as you can reach. He knows how sensitive your hole is, feels it quivering against his tongue. 

He knows your body better than you do, knows exactly how to make you come. After all of the teasing you did, all of the talk, he can’t think of anything he wants more than to make you come as quickly as possible.

You weren’t going to stop him. 

“Holy fuck, Kei, oh my god.”

His lips are moving against your clit as he tries to fuck his tongue into you deeper. He’s moving his entire face, the tip of his tongue harsh against your hole as his nose nudges against your clit. The motions are perfectly repetitive just like he knows you like it. The louder that your moans get and the harder that you start to squirm and the tighter your hands grip, the more motivated Kei is. “Gonna, fuck, I’m gonna come all over your pretty face,” you tell him between moans.

Your core is tightening and your body is convulsing, but you can’t let go. You need to hear him. He needs to tell you. You want him to tell you. “Kei, fuck, tell me. Please, tell me. Let me come, please. Please.” There is no remorse, not even after the fact. Part of that comes with the lack of snide remarks or tone from Kei, the other part comes with just how close you are and how hard you’re about to fall.

“Come, baby, come all over my pretty face, please, please come for me. Please come all over my pretty face,” he says against your pussy, but you can hear each word so clearly. That’s all it takes for you to come undone. You let go, head hitting the mattress harshly as you grab onto his hair even harder. His name is the only thing coming out of your mouth, the only thing on your mind until it isn’t.

“Again, again, again,” you say, repeating as you nod at him.

He listens instantly, diving back between your legs and continuing to eat you out. He doesn’t have to tell you to come the second time or the third or the fourth. You let them roll over you like waves, coming as soon as your body allows you to. 

“Okay, okay, fuck, okay, that’s enough,” you breathe. He doesn’t stop, driven by the pure bliss in the reactions you’ve given him and the way that you dropped control for a passing moment. He wants to feel it again, taking control from you. You almost let him. “Fuck, Kei, enough,” you repeat, more stern this time. 

He lifts his head from between your legs, face a mess, hair tangled, breath ragged. “What do you say?” you ask, not even letting him compose himself before responding. 

“Thank you,” he says, and honestly, he looks just as grateful as the labored appreciation sounds. 

You push yourself up despite how much you want to just sit with Kei’s warm cheek against the fat of your thigh and despite how tired you are from everything that just happened and despite how you want to hear Kei thank you forever. “Kei, get him prepped for me, yea?” You miss the initial reaction from Tadashi, only catch the end of his attempts to compose himself and the lasting redness on his cheekbones. You don’t say another word until you’ve made it to the doorframe. “Dashi, Kei’s in charge while I’m gone, listen good, okay?”

You catch the faintest glimpse of Kei’s smirk as he stands tall once again, making his way over to the corner of the room that Tadashi was frozen in. The second that you’re out of view, you let yourself breathe, let your shoulders slump and your legs wobble as much as they want. You grab your bag that you left at the front door and change in the familiar bathroom closest to the top of the stairs. 

You went all out, decided that if you were going to do this, you were going to do this right. The thick main harness was just one part of the intricate buckles, straps, and fasteners. You had tried it on before, the first time that you got it. Kei helped you put it on, tightened the straps and moved each piece so it fit snug and comfortable. 

The top belt sits on your waist, thick faux leather straps with buckles on each side adorned to a ring that rests on your stomach. The second set of straps holds the main ring in place, two fasteners tightly fit against your hips. You slide the dildo into the ring before tightening the straps to your liking. It’s heavy between your legs, thick and lengthy, deceivingly lifelike to the touch and eye. 

As you’re putting the finishing touches onto your look, fixing the harness and making sure that everything is exactly as you want it to be, the soft and subtle noises that you’ve been hearing from the other room become louder. The noises quickly fill the entire upstairs. You’re sure at this point that Kei has asked Tadashi not to hold back, has told him explicitly not to. 

There is a lot of gratitude coming from Tadashi and only as he’s practically screaming can you hear what he’s thanking Kei for. 

“Thank you for getting me ready for (y/n),” Tadashi cries. “Feels so good, so good, fingers feel so good thank you, Kei.”

It sends a shiver down your spine, the amount of desperation and the sincerity of the thank you.

You gently press open the cap to the lube, letting a stream of the cool liquid coat the top side of the silicone cock. You use your thumb and palm to spread it over the skin, twisting your wrist and slathering the slick liquid all over, pouring a generous amount on the tip and watching it drip from the head. You know that it’s not really yours, that it’s not actually attached to you, that you don’t feel from it, and yet, as you push your hips forward, as the cock slides between the hole you’ve created with your fist, your core feels warm and you let out a small moan. 

The walk back to the room feels like a mile. You know that the two of them are undoubtedly too enthralled in their own actions right now to notice you at the door. It’s not a bad thing though. You get to watch for a few moments. They don’t know you’re there, aren’t acting in any sort of way for an audience or praise. 

Tadashi has taken your spot. His legs are high in the air, held up by his hands grasped around his ankles. Kei holds a bottle of lube in one hand and is fucking 4 fingers into Tadashi’s hole with the other. 

Tadashi’s cock, rock hard and angrily red, is slapping against his stomach every time that Kei’s fingers bottom out. The back of his head is pressed into the mattress so hard, but his eyes are trained on Kei, bottom lip quivering whenever involuntary noises weren’t tumbling from them, sheets bunched up against sweaty palms. 

You could’ve watched this all night. You’re sure that if you hadn’t interrupted them they would’ve continued all night, partially because you didn’t give them instruction to stop, but also because the determination and joy in Kei’s demeanor matches Tadashi’s desperation perfectly. There’s something about Kei’s actions that makes it incomparable to how he acts with you, something about the fact that even though he’s in control, he’s just following directions. 

“Is he ready?” you ask, followed by an observation, “Looks like you’re just doing this for him now.”

They’re startled at your voice, immediately taken out of the intense moment that the two of them were in, but there’s no disdain for the deprivation of the transfixion. The only word to describe the look on their faces is gawking. There is less surprise in Kei’s given he’s seen you in it before, but that doesn’t stop the harsh swallow or the dwelling gaze over your chest, down to your waist, following the straps. 

Tadashi isn’t as subtle. His face is bright red, blushing, gasping for air from just being stretched. He pushes up from the bed, props himself on his elbows, and just stares. You can practically feel his heartbeat from where you’re standing in the doorway. “Is that for me?” he asks, void of the confidence the question deserves, tongue wetting his lips. 

You walk over, agonizingly slow, cock in hand. “Why don’t you turn around and I’ll show you?”

By the time you’ve made it to the edge of the bed, Tadashi has scrambled over himself and gotten on all fours, as if any delay would result in you giving up on the notion. You climb onto the bed, knees sinking into the mattress as you take in the sight before you. Tadashi looks rigid, not knowing when the next order or movement is coming, eyes forward on the pale wall. 

The second that the soft skin of your palms comes into contact with his hips, he melts into you, pushing back into your touch. His shoulders slump, head falls down, staring at the comforter below him instead. “Is this alright? Are you ready?” you ask, leaving one palm resting on his hip, but using the other hand to guide the tip of the dripping dildo against Tadashi’s stretched hole. 

The answer is evident in the urgency of his whimpers and the desperation in his reactions, but you need to hear it coming out of his mouth. “I’m not going to fuck you until you tell me you’re ready for it,” you clarify. 

“Yes, yes, I’m ready, please,” Tadashi answers. 

“Good boy.” There’s only a second between the finishing of your praise and you pressing your hips forward. It’s slow, but the pace is necessary no matter how badly you want to watch him take it all right this instant. You’re using your hand to guide the thick cock into Tadashi’s tight hole. You don’t need to physically feel it to know how tight it is, to see the rim swallowing the dildo. 

The moans and whimpers have ceased, replaced by labored breaths and diffused whines. You’d ask him questions, try to elicit some sort of verbal reply to the process, but he looks so focused on taking your cock. Still, you guide him through it, not just with the small kneading that you’re doing into his hip and the slow pace you’ve adapted, but with small coos of appreciation. “You’re doing so great, Dashi, fuck. It looks so good back here, you taking my nice thick cock just like that.” 

As soon as you don’t need your hand to guide the dildo, you lace it into Tadashi’s hair. It’s so soft. You can barely grasp any of it, can’t reach until he picks his head up and pushes it back into your hand. You feel disgustingly powerful now, hand weaved into Tadashi’s hair, slowly thrusting in and out of Tadashi’s ass. 

It takes a few beats for Tadashi to fully stretch around the girth of your cock, but with every gentle fuck into him, his whines turn back into whimpers which turn into throaty moans. “Can I go faster now?” you ask with a genuine softness. “Can you handle it?” with less genuine softness. He nods, choking out a few yeses amongst the noises.

You reward him with praise once again, “Good boy, huh, Tadashi? Are you my good boy?” You punctuate the question with a hard thrust, your hips meeting his ass in one fluid motion. His hair is tugged by your harsh grip and, with it, his lax body every time that you pull your hips away. 

He’s putty in your hand, malleable. The harder that you fuck him, the louder his moans get, the more power you feel. “Fuck, Dashi, it’s like I can fucking feel how pathetic you are squeezing my goddamn cock. So tight, so fucking perfect.” Your hips are on fire from repeatedly slamming into him, your palms are so sweaty that you can barely get a good grip, resorting to using your nails to anchor in place instead. Praise keeps falling out of your mouth so quickly that you’re not even sure what you’re saying half the time. It’s fast and you’re in control and he’s listening to you and you’re so drunk with this feeling. 

You can’t stop ramming into him, glad, actually, for once that you can’t feel how good Tadashi’s tight hole is squeezing your cock. It lets you fuck him relentlessly, no worry in the world about stamina even if your glutes and core are on fire from the constant motion. You don’t want to stop, can’t, not with how fucking perfect he looks, not with how fucking obedient he’s being. 

“I know you just want to be good, Dashi, fuck, we’ll teach you to be good, you’re being so good,” you moan. 

It’s like you’re a completely different person here, so vastly different than the last time you were in this bedroom. You don’t miss it, not even a little bit. Well… at least not at this exact moment. 

With no word from you, Kei has just been standing there, behind you, just watching . All of your attention is on Tadashi, soaking in his noises and body language, you’ve barely even noticed Kei. One quick glance over your shoulder and you can see how mesmerized he looks taking it all in, seeing you in this new element. You see the bulge in his pants, the little satisfaction that he is getting from his own palm. After doing so much already, he deserves better than what he’s giving himself now. 

“Do what you do best, Kei. Abuse his throat,” you command, trying to keep a steady voice through your wandering thoughts and thrusts. You don’t have to ask him twice, barely have to finish the three word demand and he’s walking around to the other side of the bed. 

He gets to see the side that you don’t get to see, the mouth agape and wet lashes. All that you get to see is the smirk that plagues the bottom half of Kei’s face as soon as Tadashi is in view. Your thrusts are slower now, but still at a steady enough pace to appreciate the subtle ripples in the fat of Tadashi’s ass, letting Kei get a good hold on the situation, giving up just a small fraction of your control so that Kei can have his way with Tadashi. 

You offer a bit of advice as Kei is undoing his buckle. “It’s easy to pleasure Kei,” you breathe, “You just let him do whatever he wants to you.” You can practically feel Tadashi tighten around you. 

“Open,” Kei says as soon as his cock is exposed to the air. “Wider than that, Tadashi, don’t insult me.” Both of Kei’s hands are braced on either side of Tadashi’s face as Kei pushes the tip of his cock past Tadashi’s lips. “Just like that, good.” Kei’s voice is monotonous, if only a bit condescending. “Keep that hole nice and tight for me.”

You watch Tadashi shiver as he drinks up every single word. Tadashi has been on the reciprocating end of Kei’s smart mouth before, but not like this. Even the last time he was in this room with the two of you, the directions that he was following only affected himself. Tadashi knows how poor he’s been at pleasing you in the past and he really just wants to be good, wants to listen and learn.

Kei shallowly thrusts in and out of Tadashi’s mouth, the head of his cock repeatedly slipping past Tadashi’s wet lips. “Use that slutty fucking tongue, Tadashi. You’re not doing anything, just sitting there getting railed, the least you could do is move your tongue.” Kei lets his head fall back, something evidently changing in the technique that Tadashi is using. “Good.”

The more that Kei seems to be enjoying it, the deeper his thrusts go, the faster his pace. It doesn’t take long for Kei to start using Tadashi like he uses you. If Tadashi didn’t look like he was enjoying himself as much as he did, pushing back onto your cock, whimpering and gagging around Kei’s, you would have stopped and taken his place. 

He couldn’t make you come for years, even as you tried to guide him, begged him as you cried out instructions, but there was something so different about the way he’s going down on Kei. 

You had directed him in the past, nudged his face where you wanted it to be, wrapped your legs around his neck to pull him deeper, but none of it mattered. He just couldn’t make you come. 

But there was something so distinctly different about the way Kei was treating Tadashi. There was no begging or asking, and directing wasn’t the right word, neither was guiding. Kei now has a commanding hold of Tadashi’s face, one hand on either side as he moves Tadashi’s mouth up and down his cock. His hips are still, letting Tadashi’s head bob through the complete motion. 

When Kei’s methods catch your eye, you can’t help but stop to take it in, no longer watching the ripples in his skin as your hips meet his ass, now watching it unfold from this angle, from behind Tadashi, your cock engulfed by his tight hole.

Kei’s long fingers bracket Tadashi’s face, pushing into his jaw, neck, cheek, wherever he could reach, and wherever he needed to adjust to get the most perfect angle. It’s mesmerizing. 

And it’s so different from the way he handles you. Sometimes he holds your face like that, moves you so agonizingly slow on his length that your throat will hurt for days after, but there’s always an amount of trust. 

This in front of you? The way that Kei is so meticulously moving Tadashi, the way that he’s leaving nothing up to assumption or interpretation, this is Kei teaching. 

He’s wordless about it, doesn’t teach Tadashi through verbal instructions or lengthy explanations, he just shows him exactly what he wants. It’s almost more condescending than if Kei was talking down to him in a way, like he’s too stupid to understand what he means, so he can only show him. 

You don’t think Tadashi catches this or thinks this far or has any thoughts at all right now other than controlling his breathing and every single muscle in his mouth and throat. It’s not a normal state of being, you know that well. 

You catch a glimpse of Kei’s face, manage to pull your attention away from the thick cock splitting Tadashi open and Kei’s strong hands on Tadashi’s jaw. His face is strewn with pleasure and concentration. You don’t normally get to watch Kei from this angle nor this intently. You watch his eyebrows furrow together, his jaw clench between slow exhales, his features soften and his eyes flutter close every once and awhile. You’re cursing yourself for never having filmed the two of you having sex. You would watch this on repeat if you could.

“Kei,” you breathe, ready to repeat yourself on account of how quiet his name is in comparison to the lewd sounds that are bouncing off the walls. Kei looks up at you immediately with an air of confusion, waiting for another command or instruction. When nothing else comes, he doesn’t break eye contact like you thought he might. He’s not paying attention to Tadashi save for the mindless thrusting. “God, you look so good right now.”

He clicks his tongue at the compliment, shaking his head a small amount before returning his focus, looking back down almost quick enough to hide the subtle blush on his cheekbones. You don’t force him to look back at you, though you know that you could, but you still want to have some sort of contact with him. You are becoming increasingly aware of how much you want to be where Tadashi is and how much you want to feel Kei’s skin on yours.

Tadashi’s voice pulls you out of it, the repetition of your name that follows his gasping for air. “Want, want to- So good- Need to come,” Tadashi manages to get out in between harsh swallows and intakes of air. 

“Not yet.” It comes out of your mouth without any thought and you realize why Kei does this so often. The sense of power that comes alongside controlling Tadashi’s orgasm is mindblowing. Even if he came right now, didn’t listen to you at all, you would have rode this high for weeks. 

Tadashi does listen, though. He whimpers a small okay before Kei starts using his throat again. You claw your fingernails into his hips, pressing hard enough to leave small indents in his soft skin, and you pull him onto your cock to match your thrusts. “Look at that, see, you didn’t need to cum, not yet, Dashi, being such a good boy.”

Kei only gets to fuck Tadashi’s throat for a few moments before Tadashi is pulling away once again. “I- I can’t hold it any longer, please,” Tadashi’s voice cracks as he begs. “Please.” You pull out in one motion leaving Tadashi gaping and empty in front of you. 

“Then come, Tadashi,” you say in a tone that is eerily as condescending as Kei’s. You run your hands down Tadashi’s side, grabbing onto his ass and spreading him open as wide as you can. “If you can’t hold it, then cum.”

Tadashi is thrusting into the air. “I- I can’t.”

“You’ve come without touching yourself before,” your voice is stern but steady at first, but as you keep thinking about it, there is a simmering underlying anger that is emerging. “Sat right there on the corner of the bed and came in your pants like a pathetic little cuck.”

You grab Tadashi by the shoulder, flipping him over onto his back. “Kei, pillow under his head so he can look at me while I’m fucking talking to him.” Kei doesn’t hesitate for a second, puts the pillow underneath Tadashi’s head so that his line of sight is directly at your face, eyes narrowed as you continue. 

“When no one is paying attention to you, when you’re watching your ex get railed and satisfied in a way that you never could, you lose your mind. You’ll shoot your load, make a fucking mess all over yourself, but when I’m here giving you everything that you could ever want, you can’t fucking come?”

You positioned yourself between Tadashi’s legs, the head of the dildo grazing his hole. “What? When Kei tells you to do it you can, but when I tell you to come after pounding my fat fucking cock in and out of you, you can’t? Do you know how fucking pathetic that is?” 

Tadashi’s chest is rising and falling faster, his breath is labored and he’s not breaking eye contact with you. You can tell just how close he is.

“I won’t tell you again. Instead, I’ll just fucking leave. Come. Now.” You wrap your hand around his throat, leaning your weight into your grip as his face scrunches up in ecstasy. His lips are moving, but no sound is coming out and only when you ease up on your grip can you hear the gratitude that he’s repeating in between the grunts.

His come spills from the head of his cock, lazily dripping down the sides of his rock hard erection and down his twitching balls. He’s struggling to keep his hands at his side and not jerk himself off through his orgasm. 

“Is that all it took?” you scoff, pressing the head of the dildo against his asshole, catching some of his come as it drips down. “Still hard though, right, Dashi? Still want to get fucked?” You don’t give him time to answer before pushing your hips forward, slowly spearing him with your cock as tears fall from his eyes.

“Yes, fuck, please, I want to come again,” Tadashi begs, eyes not leaving yours. 

“Greedy,” you shake your head, but you can’t hide your smirk as you pick up the pace. In this position you get to watch his face as you ruin him. The tears that are running down his face, wetting his cheeks and long lashes, just make it that much hotter. His cock is slapping against his stomach as thrust in and out of him.

It doesn’t take long before his breaths are closer together, back is arching, hips rolling, and he’s nodding in your direction. “I- I’m already so close. Can- I need- I want-.”

“What do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you. You’ve been so good, came for me without anything but my voice, took Kei’s cock so well, just tell me what you want,” you say.

No one has touched his cock all night, covered in his own come, violently twitching against himself as it slaps against his stomach. 

His eyes are screwed shut, thrusting up into nothing, consequently fucking himself on your cock, you’re sure that he’s going to ask to touch himself. In your mind, there’s no other option, nothing that he would feel comfortable enough asking for. 

It leaves his mouth so confidently. He trusts you so much, knows that you wouldn’t have said it if it wasn’t true, so he asks for exactly what he wants and he’s so assured as he does. 

“Want Tsukki’s mouth on my cock.”

You look up to see Kei’s reaction, refuse to do it if there is any sort of discomfort or distaste, but there’s nothing of the sort. He gives a short nod, a nod that Tadashi is too fucked out to notice. You don’t slow your pace or allow a falter in your rhythm as you watch Kei climb onto the bed. He’s gentle as he takes Tadashi’s cock into his mouth, captures the head first, swirling his tongue around the tip before taking the entire length. Kei doesn’t seem to struggle much, easily takes it to the base.

Tadashi is surprised despite the fact that he’s the one that asked for it so nicely. His eyes flutter shut, truly taking in every single feeling and sensation that is happening to him right now. Tadashi’s hips are thrusting up into Kei’s mouth now, moaning as he slides down Kei’s throat and then falls down onto your cock. 

“Gonna- Can I? Please,” Tadashi can barely say more than two words at a time, but you know exactly what he’s asking for. 

“Go ahead, Dashi, come, you deserve it.” 

As soon as you say the word, he’s coming down Kei’s throat. You watch it drip from the corners of Kei’s mouth as Tadashi keeps thrusting desperately. Tadashi is thanking you and thanking Kei and mumbling other words that you can’t quite pick up. His hands are roaming, trying to find a place to land. One finds a spot lightly on Kei’s shoulder and you meet the other hand with your own, locking your fingers with his as he holds onto you through his orgasm.

Kei waits for Tadashi to calm down before pulling his head off of his cock. Kei wipes his lips and you can tell there's a smart comment that wants to come out so badly, but he doesn’t get the chance to say it. 

“Thank you,” Tadashi says, eyes shutting every other second. You’re surprised that he’s still awake after two back-to-back orgasms like that. His eyebrows furrow and he perks up just a little bit, “but, wait, what about- what about you guys?”

You shake your head, carefully getting up from the bed, cautious not to disturb Tadashi as Kei gently positions him more comfortably in bed. You unbuckle the straps on your harness, taking it off and stepping out of it. You feel so light without the extra weight between your legs.

You manage to get in bed before Kei reaches for the covers and extra blankets. “This wasn’t about us,” you assure Tadashi. “Thank you for letting us in and for trusting us enough to do this again.” You feel the mattress dip behind you as Kei climbs underneath the covers he’s laid on top of the two of you. 

In the morning there will be more to say, more conversations to be had, boundaries to set and feelings to talk out, but for now… for now you are happily in bed, surrounded and warm, and you know that your company is too. 

taglist: @daddyjackfrost @karasunoya @girlwith-kalei-do-scope-eyes @itsmeteiiteii @omiivr @cyueksims @kei-tsuki21 @ks-tsukki @snazzyturtles @rinniemybeloved @tsukiran @kurapika-1999 @hehatesmati

join my taglist here!! ~~ (one more chapter left?!?!?!) ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

[chronicsyd]

Soooooo I just watched the trailer for S2 and uhhhh-ahhh ah-ha… (lemme just... share my thoughts real quick):

Vi is outright calling Jinx, “Jinx”. She Definitely thinks Powder is beyond saving at this point (I knew it was coming, but it’s still sad to see at the same time) and she says “my sister is gone” so yea, she Fully believes this herself. And I think that’s the stick that broke the camel’s back for Vi to be sticking around topside.

I hope to God Ambessa doesn’t mean the Entire council is dead… (but with absences of Viktor and Jayce in this trailer isn’t getting my hopes up) maybe she just means that there’s So little people that there’s nothing the council can Actually do anymore, and so everything is just in chaos. (Also yea, my predictions of Cassandra being dead were spot on… so good job me)

Honestly, I was expecting Ambessa to have a more “antagonistic” (not outright Villain, but she’s certainly not making things better if that makes sense) role this season, Clearly she stuck around for a reason. I also kinda think she’s addressing either Caitlyn or Jayce (should he happen to Be alive) with the words she’s saying here. (my thoughts are leaning more towards Caitlyn because she says, “You will have Justice” and I think that’s what’s Caitlyn’s looking for. and if Mel happens to die in that council room, she also feels the loss that would bring as well as Caitlyn.)

Well… I wanted “Unhinged Caitlyn” and I CERTIANLY got it…

SO… I was Wrong about S2 being the last season, yea I’m a little upset about it. And I’m now worried about certain characters meeting their demise (oh God I hope that Vi isn’t the one that kills Jinx if it happens… I don’t think I’ll EVER be able to recover from that)  

Ekko’s still alive yay! (no shit sherlock…) (I’m honestly expecting more between him and Jinx this season) (also Heimerdinger's there... but i expected that as he is no longer a councilor)

Warick showing up, of course…

Noxus and Enforcers will be working together here… oh dear…

One of the clips Clearly show’s Caitlyn wearing the old enforcer uniform (you can tell by the color of the collar thing she’s wearing, and the sides of the collar don’t stick up around her neck in the newer uniform) so that happens early on in the season

Vi seeing the death and devastation that Jinx has caused to the council and topside is what I think shook her in that direction to believe that Jinx is beyond saving. And it Hurts for her to admit it, you can clearly hear it in her voice.

Jinx says to Vi first thing, “Finally got the name right… sister.” (she probably tries to go after Jinx in the first part of the season, still believing that Powder’s there. But has to learn that there’s only Jinx. And Jinx is the one that needs to be stopped) and there's SO much venom in her voice when she says it too, like damn...

Now I think there’s MORE to the face Vi’s pulling in that last teaser we got with her than “just being an Enforcer” “not happy being an Enforcer” all that fun jazz.

I have No idea who’s under that cloak… they’ve done a good job hiding their face

of course Sevika's still around, wasn't expecting anything less. but there's clearly no "top dog" to take Silco's place. everyone in Zaun is just fighting for their own thing and not under one specific person if that makes Any sense.

I don't recognize who Sevika sees to be fighting in that clip (does anyone know who it is? or is it just someone we haven't met yet)

Netflix is still calling this a "teaser" so i believe that we have to have at least One full trailer that's probably being given to us in a few months before S2 arrives

Vi's wearing Claggor's goggles I'm gonna CRY

(I’m most definitely probably going to add things and have “sudden realizations” so be on the lookout for that… ha-ha)

[tired-lamb]

final thoughts on battle for the pridelands

my liveblogging was… chaotic, to say the least, but I wanted to really gather my thoughts on this episode because its a big, big one. figuratively AND literally lol.

first things first the new designs straight up shook me in a /neu way, it’s not that I don’t like them but I just wasn’t ready to let go of the old designs yet, y’know? I kind of dislike how Fuli’s design feels like a completely different character, but otherwise it’s eh. I think seeing the guard grow up just made me emotional, haha. I wish Janja, Cheezi, Chungu and Jasiri got new designs tho, since I hc them to be roughly around the same age as the rest of the guard. I understand that making new designs for a whole bunch of characters (characters that wouldn’t be appearing much later, too) would be a lot of work but it just felt kind of odd to see Jasiri unchanged next to Teen Kion or whatever. Maybe at least change some tiny details, if not the entire design.

I like that they delved more into Kion worrying this time. it really puts into perspective that.. yea, these guys are child soldiers. thats. gonna come with a lot of emotional load. seeing Fuli and the others worry about Kion was a nice touch too, honestly. definitely opens up for thoughts about just HOW much these guys are affected by the whole child soldier thing. hearing all five of them sing again was wonderful <3 especially Ono, since he doesn’t get to sing a lot.

Scar’s betrayal of Janja was expected, lol. I actually REALLY like the way the show carried out Janja’s redemption, and WOW his song slaps. the guard + Janja’s clan getting stuck in the Lair while it was on fire was also really interesting to me, and I wish they hadn’t taken the route of them just.. escaping through Beshte’s pool. it was like.. what was the point of putting them there then? I’ll probably put more stakes in my maybe-going-to-exist rewrite, but lets see how I go with that.

*COUGH* why does Kiara basically look the same *COUGH* Kion looks older than her at this point *COUGH COUGH*

oookay, the stuff that went down at the volcano was WHEW. Scar’s song with this Strange Lion guy was like wow ok so . introducing new lore to explain why you’ll give Kion his scar and then completely forget abt it (or at least I think they do, I still haven’t watched the rest of the season), nice! buuut also creative, dare I say. song’s not bad!

ANGST. Scar singing the song Sisi Ni Sawa, the show’s most popular song, to Kion and LITERALLY MEANING IT. this is one of the few(?) times the show outright parallels Scar and Kion, and god I actually loved it. the fanfic writer side of me is leaning forward in my chair because there is no way Kion’s not going to forget that thought. Scar’s last words to Kion were literally “Sisi Ni Sawa”. Kion is the Direct Successor of Scar in terms of Lion Guard leader. THE POTENTIAL. THE ANGST. (cough) okay, but apart from that yahoo more delving into Kion’s character.

Bunga diving in to save Kion from Ushari and then promptly falling into the lava gave me a fricking heart attack. call me dramatic but started getting emotional on the spot. ONO FLYING INTO THE LAVA TO SAVE HIM did NOT help, and someone save my poor boy I feel so bad for him agh 😭

The outlanders reaction to Scar being gone felt kind of bland, but then again I’m not really sure what else it COULD have been. I’m sure some of you do, though, so feel free to share your thoughts:].

I am Absolutely Unwell over the fact that Ono has technically lost his vision and as a person who ships bunga x ono AND bunga x ono x beshte you better expect me to write something about it. Lion Guard writers I am coming for your kneecaps (or whatever the saying is now, idk).

there’s.. a lot of things I would have changed, but thats because I dislike how childish the show can get sometimes. call me out, I deserve it, the show is meant for kids, but it has potential!!! I’m not outright hating how kiddy it is, heck I’m like. mega fan of kid’s shows, but all I say is that it has the potential to turn into something less for kids, more maybe for pre-teens and above.

again, not sure if I’ll rewrite the episode since I’ll have to do a lot of thinking, but it is definitely something I’ll consider! shoutout to my mutuals for being with me till here, and for supporting me in my very much chaotic liveblogs. love you guys dearly /p /gen

*raises glass of fruit juice dramatically* to season three!!!!