#but why the fuck should i risk not graduating when they refuse to plan me in on times i can actually work

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for slowly ghosting a fwb instead of confronting him when I found out he's been stalking people again?

He (twenties, M) and I (twenties, X) knew each other from college. He's genuinely a fun guy. Also, a cis person being into you as a nonbinary person (as your gender, not despite it) in a non-fetishy way is frankly too powerful. So yeah, we started talking more some time after graduation, and it turned into a digital-only friends-with-benefits situation.

I was wary of him in college, but willing to give him a second chance. It was an open secret among our friend group that he'd stalked a couple of people he was into in college -- resulting in court ordered therapy and a restraining order and everything. I was still mentally/emotionally recovering from an abusive relationship years prior that the ex stalked me after for a few years. So you can see why it was a big deal that I gave this distant friend another chance, willing to get as close to him as I did. I guess I thought that like, the therapy had worked?

Well, fast forward to us being close after college. He doesn't know that I know about his previous two times getting nearly expelled for stalking people. I have not told him anything about my years-ago abusive relationship, but it's possible he has some awareness of it due to mutual friends. I kept firm with a boundary that he will have no more specific geographic information about me than my city, and he's certainly never learning my address. He has no way to know about my more "personal" social media like Tumblr. I am protecting myself.

But a few months into us being fwb and having fun and me repeatedly asserting my boundaries regarding irl interaction. He complains to me that someone is claiming that he's stalking them. I casually ask about the situation, assert that yeah what he's doing is shitty, he should stop, and it does sound like stalking (even though he insists it isn't). We never talk about it again.

He started showing up in my trauma nightmares, and suddenly the second chance I gave him seems like a terrible idea. So, over the next few months, I make a planned retreat. I respond less frequently, less promptly, and with less emotion. I planned out my strategy by the week to look like a natural loss of interest, or a natural "got busy with other stuff."

My logic is that he clearly has not learned to stop stalking people. I am not willing to continue exposing myself to that personal risk. But I am also not willing to say "I refuse to remain friends with an unrepentant stalker." I'm afraid that if I do that, he will get the wrong lesson: that he needs to never admit to any other friend what he's done, or else he'll lose them. The right lesson obviously would be: don't follow people to their houses after they've cut contact and don't send them letters asking whether they're living alone again yet, what the fuck. I am afraid that if I tell him why I'm ghosting, he will simply never talk about this pattern ever again, thus removing the ability of future friends like me to make informed decisions about who they're spending their time with.

We're now one year into when I fully ended contact. I did not block him. I still get two texts a week from him -- sometimes "are you okay" sometimes life updates, usually just "hey". He has made no indications that he has visited the city where I live, thank god. I have not explained to any of our mutual friends what I did. I have not talked to anyone, not my therapist not my spouse, about what I did. I am not going to speak to him again, but I am not going to block him, because I need my cutting contact to look natural.

So yeah. AITA for not making a bigger deal of his continued stalking of other people? In my mind I'm protecting myself, and reducing the likelihood he'll start hiding his nature from future friends, so this way they can be informed and protect themselves as needed. But AITA for lowkey ghosting him instead of having a serious conversation about his behavior? I know he sucks. I just don't know if I also suck.

What are these acronyms?

[alittlesimp]

rant time 😍

[lovesreality]

Sometimes Goodbye is a Second Chance - Steve Harrington x Y/n

Sometimes Goodbye is a Second Chance - Steve Harrington x Y/n

Summary: After a cold breakup with Steve Harrington, y/n vows not to love again. One long long road trip across the US later, y/n returns to Hawkin’s to not only see the people she left behind, but to find out why everything had happened once and for all.

“I think we should break up,” Steve yelled out, causing both of them to freeze in their tracks. Steve stood on the patio, shocked at the words that had come out of his mouth. Y/n stood near the sliding glass door to his backyard, mouth open, eyes filled with tears.

“What the fuck Steve?” She asked, confused on how an argument about him forgetting to pick her up this afternoon had gone so wrong. Steve wanted to take the words back, but at the same time he knew it was too late. All the two of them had done this entire week was argue. That wasn’t to say they didn’t love each other, because Steve would risk his life for her. He had done it before, jumping into Lover’s Lake before she could first. He knew she would do the same. Y/n had when he was pulled back into the water, not even taking off her shoes before jumping in. They had planned a future together, one of six little nuggets and summer trips. Dreams of graduating, of getting married, of growing old, and now they were all being shattered.

“I think we should break up,” he spoke quieter this time, looking from the ground to her eyes. His eyes weren’t shining like they usually did. They were full, filled with pain and pleading, as if to say yell at me, call me a liar, hold me and tell me we can get through this.

“Wow,” Y/n said, shaking her head and wiping away the tears that fell. She felt numb. Her whole world, her future was crumbling and she knew she couldn’t do anything to change that. “Alright, then.” Steve tried to take her in before she would inevitably leave. She stood in a short green dress, one that was his favorite. The soft summer breeze caused the skirt of it to gently pull to the left. The converse he had bought her in return for ruining her shoes at Lover’s Lake were on her feet. He remembered her refusal to let him buy her the shoes, claiming he would have jumped in for her too. He hadn’t cared, and had bought them anyway, presenting them to her the next day. Her hair was down, her face wet with tears. Y/n turned around silently, not even bothering to say goodbye. Steve stood in his spot, listening to her walk through his house. He heard his front door open and be softly shut. He wished she had slammed it, had screamed at him. It would make him feel better, but she hadn’t. Steve sat on the edge of his pool, jeans pulled up, feet bare. He cried by the edge of the water for hours before finally giving in and calling Robin. Robin called him an idiot, but she didn’t hesitate to rush to his house, gently hugging him as he cried into her shoulder.

While Steve spent the next day sadly putting her stuff in a box, Y/n sat in the car in her garage. It was a rusted red Ford Cortina her father had given her. The AC was newly fixed, a project her and Steve had taken on together. They planned to paint it and fix it up and go on a road trip by the end of summer. Another dream crushed, and all she wanted to do was take a baseball bat to her car. Instead of doing just that, she grabbed the money she had stored on her closet. Money from countless birthdays, holidays, chores, money from her paycheck at family video, and she walked four miles to the auto shop, eyes puffy from her night of crying. When she left the auto shop, she walked away with a used Vulcan 750, a black motorcycle she had seen every time she went to the store. She rode it back to her house, thankful for one of her exes back in high school. As soon as she got home, she threw a few things into a duffel bag (her favorite outfit and a toothbrush with toothpaste), and grabbed her cassette player and headphones. 

She wrote a note to her dad, explaining she was going on a road trip and would call him. Putting the rest of her money into a wallet, she threw on jeans, a t-shirt, and windbreaker. Then, she took off, leaving Hawkins on her new bike. She didn’t bother driving past Steve’s house, even though she wanted to. As she hit the highway, blowing past the ‘Thanks for stopping by!’ Hawkins sign, relief flooded through her body. As she drove on, she thought about everything with Steve. Her heart hurt so bad. It was like someone had ripped into her chest. She missed Steve already, wishing he was driving the bike and she was holding on to his torso, grinning. Pushing that memory from her mind, Y/n decided to swear off boys. She didn’t know if she would feel that way forever, but she sure as hell knew that this road trip wouldn’t end with any relationships (maybe some hookups if she could bear it). She turned the radio up on the bike, breathing in the warm summer air as her hair whipped behind her. It was time to start over.

Four months later, October seventh. 

Steve groaned, dejectedly resting his head on top of his homework. Robin huffed annoyed as the library table creaked at Steve’s weight. “Can you focus? We aren’t ever going to get this done if you don’t listen,” Robin complained.

“We’ve been focused the last hour and we haven’t gotten anything done,” Steve argued, raising his head off the table to glare at her. They were two months into their first semester at Hawkins University and were having some extreme trouble with their calculus homework. “I don’t understand why I have to know calculus to be able to teach kids about the ABCs. It’s not like first graders are gonna be even learning fractions at that age!” Steve had finally decided what he wanted to do, which was teach elementary schoolers. Robin on the other hand wanted to be something that involved animals, perhaps a scientist or a veterinarian. 

“I don’t know dingus, maybe because you have to be smarter than them to teach them?” They exchanged glares before Steve sighed.

“Let’s just get this over with. Class starts in an hour,” he gestured to the array of papers and textbooks on their table. They continued attempting the work, Robin trying to explain how to find limits on graphs or something. 

“And this is the library, open until 10 on weekdays and twelve on weekends. We open every morning at 6,” the librarian explained, Y/n standing behind her taking in the library. Robin looked up to investigate, her mouth dropping open as she met eyes with her. As Robin got up, she tripped over the chair but caught herself. Steve looked up, finally looking to where Robin was now running to. His heart stopped as he saw her, arms open to receive Robin’s hug. 

“Y/n! When did you get back?” Robin asked, pulling away from the hug to look at the girl. Y/n smiled, shrugging. 

“Two days ago. I managed to get a late enrollment here so I came for the tour,” she smiled, pulling her jeans up. She turned to the librarian. “Thank you so much for the tour, if it’s alright could I catch up with some friends?” The librarian nodded, walking back towards her desk. 

“You should come sit with-” Robin stopped, biting her lip. Y/n looked over to where Robin had come from, her eyes meeting with the one and only Steve Harrington’s. She quickly averted her eyes back to Robin, pulling a tight lipped smile. 

“I should probably go. I have to stop by the office for my schedule,” she deterred, hoping to leave before she had to have an awkward conversation with Steve. Meanwhile, Steve thought the opposite. He was working up the courage to talk to Y/n, something he hadn’t been able to do since she left the day after they broke up. When he had brought her stuff to her house, her dad had answered, telling him she would be away for a while. Steve had been worried since then but he hadn’t been able to get a hold of her. Robin and Y/n hugged again, agreeing to call each other. As Y/n left through the doors and Robin sat down again next to him, raising her eyebrows at Steve’s forlorn face.

“Earth to Steve. What’s wrong with you?” she asked, waving her hand in front of his face. He broke out of whatever trance he was under.

“I- oh. Nothing,” he shook his head. 

“Steve.”

“Robin, I’m fine.”

“Do you still have feelings for her?” Robin asked abruptly. Steve turned to her quickly, putting his hand over her mouth.

“Don’t shout that out,” he winced.

“Oh. My. God.” Robin whispered as he lowered his hand. “You still love her?” Steve rolled his eyes, not bothering to nod as he met Robin’s eyes. They stared at each other for a moment before Robin flicked him in the forehead, hard.

“Hey! That hurt!” Steve whined, glaring at her.

 “What the hell, Steve? Why did you even break up with her then?” Robin knew that the two of them had broken up, but she never tried to pry and see why. She talked to Y/n every few days but it had never been about Steve.

“Because she was too good for me,” Steve blurted out, eyes widening like they had when he had blurted out that he wanted to break up. Robin’s faced softened as she put a hand over Steve’s. “I felt like my dreams were suffocating her, like she couldn’t be her own person. We had been fighting so much and I thought she was going to break up with me and so it just came out.” Steve’s eyes bore a look of pain. “I wanted to end it before she had the chance, Rob.” Robin sighed. 

“Do you still want to be with her?” Robin asked cautiously after a few seconds. Steve averted his eyes, looking past the table at the floor.

“Of course. I think about her every damn day Robin. But hell, she left Hawkins when we broke up. I doubt she could ever want to be with me,” Steve muttered. Robin didn’t say it out loud, but when she saw Y/n notice Steve, she had smiled at first. She hadn’t bore a look of hate. It was one of longing, of pain, of love. If Y/n was really over Steve would she have run away so fast? Robin sighed, confused on how to help her best friends. “Can we finish the homework later, Robin? I wanna go home,” Steve sighed.

“Yeah, sure Steve. You still owe me a ride though,” Robin grinned, stuffing her papers into her bag. She waited by the door for Steve, and then they raced out to the parking lot where it was now pouring rain, giggling as the hopped into Steve’s car. Robin did her best to distract Steve as he drove her back to her house. They listened to ‘Never Ending Story’ multiple times, trying to recreate Dustin and Suzie’s parts. They finally reached Robin’s house, where she yelled goodbye as she ran up her driveway, almost slipping on the wet pavement. Steve drove the rest of the way home, driving slow as the rain poured down even harder. He peeled off his wet clothes as soon as he got home, changing into only a pair of sweatpants and socks as he towel-dried his hair. He was in the midst of deciding what to eat for his dinner when he jumped as his doorbell rang. He glanced over to the clock, it was almost 8 PM but it was fully dark outside and he could still hear the pouring rain. Steve placed his TV dinner back in the freezer and walked toward the door. 

“Hello?” He asked as the door swung open. There she was, her t-shirt and jeans drenched, her hair clinging wetly to her face. “Y/n? What are yo-”

“Why did you do it Steve?” Y/n asked, yelling over the roar of the sky.

“You should come in, I-, your soaked, Y/n,” Steve gestured to the door, but she took a step back. 

“Why did you break up with me Steve?!” Y/n shouted, voice cracking as she asked the question she’d had on her mind for the last four months. Steve stepped out of the threshold, getting soaked in an instant.

“Y/n,” he spoke softly, his hand grabbing hers. She ripped it away, tears falling down her numb face.

“I should leave,” she said, shaking her head as she spun around. Steve stood there panicking as she walked toward that damned motorcycle. 

“No! I- I painted your car!” Steve yelled, and she turned around when she heard the pleading in his voice. The confused look on her face relieved Steve as he tried to find the words. “I painted it dark green like we talked about. I had it cleaned and everything. It’s just how yo- we dreamed.” They stared at each other, tears falling from both faces.

“Why, Steve? Why did you break up with me? Why did you paint the car? Why didn’t you come after me when I left? Why? Goddamnit, Steve.” Steve finally spewed out his explanation, needing to get everything off of his chest.

“You were too good for me,” his voice cracked as a sob escaped his throat. “My dreams were too much, I was forcing them on you.” He covered his face with his hands. “That week has been so rough, all the arguing over little things. I thought you were gonna break up with me and I got scared. I knew it would break me to pieces, so I did it- I did it first,” Steve rambled. “And when you left I thought you would hate me. Your dad was only able to get calls from you so he couldn’t give me your number. And that car. That car was all I had left from us, so I fixed it. I fixed it so I could imagine that one day we could go on a summer trip, our family. I did it because I loved you, because I loved us, because I wanted us and you and a future. I still do, god, I still want you so bad Y/n it hurts. I love you Y/n. Jesus I love you so much.” Steve covered his eyes, not wanting to see her response to his declaration of love. He felt like he had ruined everything again. He let tears fall, the rain pelting hard on his bare shoulders as he waited to hear something. He expected to hear her run, to hop on her motorcycle and never return this time. Instead, all he heard was the rain pouring, thunder overhead drowning out everything. Then he heard a soft whisper, almost like the wind taunting him. Except it wasn’t because it was Y/n’s voice, and it came from her mouth.

“I love you too.” Then their bodes slammed together. Neither of them were sure who had closed the distance, but all they could do was feel each other. Steve wrapped his arms around her, and she did the same to his neck, one hand in his hair. Steve had one hand on her face, the other pulling her flush against his bare chest. Their lips explored each others, and four months of passion flowed through every touch shared. Their skin was on fire, burning with need. Y/n pulled back from the dizzying kiss, trying to catch her breath as they leaned against each others foreheads. “They were always our dreams, Steve. I want them as much as you do. And never ever say you’re not enough, because you will always be much much more than enough for me.” Their lips met again as they stumbled to Steve’s front door, slamming it behind them. They kissed their way up the steps, wet clothes being stripped hurriedly in the hallway and on Steve’s floor as they explored the bodies they had been missing. They spent the night together in Steve’s bed, speaking and doing the most unholy things throughout the storm. When they woke up in the morning, together for the first time in four months, they kissed, trying to make up all of the ‘I love you’s and sweet nothings they had missed.  

Sometimes, goodbye is a second chance.

[adamfoolcry]

i hate you, i love you (k.dy)

it's valentine's day and you try your hardest not to fall back in the arms of one kim doyoung - your former boss, recluse and closed off, your fuck buddy - whom you are completely in love with.

pairings: CEO!Doyoung x Fem!Reader, Johnny x Fem!Reader rating: 18+   genre: angst and smut  warnings: swearing, explicit sexual situations - hate sex, dirty talk wc: 3k+ prompt: 'i hate you' 

a/n: This is a part of Candy Hearts Collab hosted by @127-mile . Text in blockquote are text messages.Thank you for beta reading simmi(@sly-merlin ) and indi(@ncteaxhoe​). Not proofread excuse the mistakes please contact me if you would like to do so. Enjoy! - xo aria

Doyoung:

I don't know if you'll even read this but if you do, I want you to know that what we have for two years was not a game for me. Maybe we can't start being honest with each other. When you make up your mind you know where to reach me.

Mina really knows how to dress you up to the nines, you'll give her that.

"It's not bad," you nod at your reflection approvingly as you examine the dress you wrestled yourself in, clinging to your body in the right places effectively enhancing your silhouette. The soft silky texture of satin feels exquisite against your skin however you can’t exude the confidence the dress might have channeled you with. You don’t feel grand in fact you feel the opposite;

You want to cancel the date.

"Oh for christ's sake, ______. Maybe try to put some enthusiasm into this," Mina spun you around to face her, your back to the whole body mirror where a while ago you two were examining the outfit she picked up from the back of your closet - where dressier clothing of yours reside not seeing the light of the day unless for special occasions. 

Placing both her hands on your shoulders, "You were so excited when you called me to pick something to wear. What happened?" She further inquired.

You heave a sigh, "I don't know I am just not in a mood to go out on a date with a stranger," you admitted.

Mina pulls your eyes back to hers, gleaming with determination. "You are ______, an economics major who graduated on top of her class, who landed a new job as a senior financial analyst despite being in the industry for only three years. Now repeat it," Mina orders you.

"What does it have to do with -" you rolled your eyes, and whined dramatically.

She clicks her tongue on the roof of her mouth in displeasure, "Go on say it"

"I am ______, graduated on the top of my class and landed a new position as a senior financial analyst despite my tenurity," you mumble in a low voice.

"Good," Mina coddled you as if you are an infant who uttered her first word, "now add I am young, smart, and men want me."

You open your mouth to protest but Mina only pinned you with a hard look and you know you will not be getting out of this until you do as she says.

"I am young, smart, and men want me." You did as she told you.

Begrudgingly you did feel a lot better.

This is the third step of banishing Kim Doyoung in your life entirely. 

First is to send a resignation letter - done. 

Second, secure a new employment - done.

Third is to pursue a romantic relationship.

"Now let's get you ready for your date." Mina pulled you to the present, squeezing your bare shoulders to comfort you.

"I know that what you did is really hard. The sudden big change and all but today's Valentine's day you need to have a little fun today."

"I know Mina, now do my makeup." You pulled her to where your vanity table is located as you paste a smile on your face in order to placate her worries.

--------

If people were to know why you are doing this they might have called you silly.

After graduating from university you were offered the position of financial analyst in his company - a small but budding start up in Tech. Never would you have expected to land a job in your chosen field straight out of college. You are doing what you have envisioned yourself doing: analysing the trends and forecasting sales of the company's cloud solutions. You are comfortable with your current living situation, not what you have imagined after your parents cut you off no longer sending you an allowance. You thought you'd be working your ass off to make ends meet. Thankfully, the pay was high enough for you to live in an apartment in the city, pay your bills in time, and afford luxuries you knew that most people your age wouldn't have the money for. 

Everything seems perfect right? A job that you genuinely love, good pay, living in the heart of the city but of course you just have to develop feelings for your boss: Kim Doyoung. And that complicates everything; enough for you to decide to completely start over again.

Kim Doyoung has managed to worm into every nook and cranny of your life.

Kim Doyoung is a magnetic man, of few words, stern straight brows, and wide shoulders swaddled in elegant suits. He runs the company based on data-driven decisions unafraid of taking risks that produces the highest profitable outcome. Working at his company where all ten workers directly reports and closely works with him, you and your colleagues have developed quite a personal relationship with him. It was not conventional per se but you guess this is how all start-ups operate with a slightly different work culture. Unlike big corporations there is no bureaucracy, filling for leaves can just be a phone call or a visit to his office.

As his only financial analyst almost never leaving his side. You'd like to think that Doyoung might have developed a soft spot for you, maybe not in a romantic sense but in a platonic friendly way. He values your opinion enough that he asks for your input in any pivotal decisions either in work or his personal life. Whether to facilitate the migration to cloud as external contractors of big corporations or to oversee the renovation of his penthouse. And in small things too honestly, after all he asked for your help to decide whether the decor should be a Bohemian vibe or modern minimalistic black and grey.

That was until you fucked after the in-office celebration of closing a big contract. One moment he is talking about the vase that serves as a centerpiece of his dining table that you helped him pick, the next he was pulling your arm leading you to a dimly lit room. 

Yes, you did drink but you were sober enough to protest if you didn't want it; who are you kidding? Of course you wanted it to happen. Not one word of objection was uttered as he pinned you to the wall with your legs circling his waist. Instead of protests what left your lips was series of moans and his name in breathless pleas that he had to stuff your mouth with his fingers or else your colleagues will hear the two of you having sex two rooms away from them.

Doyoung slipped out of you stepping back to let you down.Your stilettos made a clicking noise as it came in contact with the tiled floor that echoed in your eardrums; deafening. Coming back down to earth and from your high is also the moment when you realized the mess you put yourself into by fucking Doyoung - your boss - in a storage room.

You righted both your disheveled appearances - to look as normal as possible - in order to go back to the pantry where the celebration was still in full swing. The tense silence that wrapped the atmosphere makes you want to shrivel in shame, both of you were aware of the line that you have crossed. 

The unspoken words were hanging in the air -

It was a mistake. Let's forget this ever happened. - and you refused to acknowledge the elephant in the room, the stillness making you uncomfortable by the second.

"_______ -," Doyoung started.

"We don't have to talk about it Doyoung." 

You moved for the door, not looking back to peek at Doyoung's expression. You just wanted to get out of the dusty storage room, the stuffy air and Doyoung's proximity, suffocating you. 

You thought you were smart enough not to make the same mistake again but you seem to have a penchant for getting hurt because you did it again and again every chance you got. When the effects of orgasm are wearing off and you are left naked and vulnerable you always find yourself swearing that it will be the last time but you already knew you were lying.

You just can't get enough of Doyoung even though it hurts to pretend that each encounter was meaningless.

Sleeping with someone where you never knew where you stand at is excruciatingly painful. 

You can't be jealous when you hear about the new girl he's with because you have no right.

It is painful when Doyoung gives you some false hope. Visiting you almost everyday in your small office bearing lunch for the two of you. He often spends half of his day loitering in your space, perching himself on the corner of your desk pushing around the knick knacks around your desk while you are busy with work.

Only to dash it when he tells you about the latest girl he's seeing which would mean your ears would bear the brunt of his relationship woes until it falls apart only for the vicious cycle to repeat again when he found himself in another one of his flings.

Everyday as he asks for relationship advice you feel yourself getting worn out and the green eyed monster roaring it's head, you try your hardest to tamp it down with your rational thinking. 

What hurts the most is he started his series of flings a week after you hooked up, rubbing on your face that it means nothing to him at all.

So after countless hours, days, and months of anguish you started planning your escape.

--------

There are so many thoughts running through your head it starts with: Did I overdress? Is Johnny having a good time? 

Then drifts into completely unrelated manners.

Did I manage to say goodbye to all of my co-workers? Clear out my desk in my office? Surrender my elevator pass to the friendly security guard? Retrieve my favorite mug in the pantry? 

Will everything be ok? Will I excel at my new company? Will I fit in a big corporation?

Will I miss Doyoung?

Am I doing the right thing?

Johnny cleared his throat which broke your reverie, your eyes settling in his face but Johnny seems to find the table napkin worthy of his attention rather than maintaining eye-contact with you.

"I had fun today but I think -," You see Johnny hesitating to continue his sentence, linking and unlinking his fingers instead.

You get it and you can't blame Johnny for his lack of interest. You were barely with him today after the small talk had died down and the two of you had finished your meals. You didn't make an effort to get to know him, the conversation was one sided as you barely threw the questions back at him; replying in terse short sentences as if you would rather be anywhere but having dinner with him.

"Yeah me too but it's really nice to spend Valentine's with you though and getting all dolled up. Makes me forget I am single," You joked and flashed him a smile; relieved, Johnny finally met your eyes as his actions mirror yours curving his lips into a smile.

-------

You hailed a cab for a ride back to your apartment, settling in the backseat you instructed and gave the address to the driver as his radio blasted cheesy romantic songs in your ear, making you feel more disappointed with how bad your date with Johnny went.

As the cab speeds through the city, the citylights intermingle with each other creating a spectrum of colors that bounce back at the cab’s windows, the scenery of skyscrapers blurring past your eyes and your mind returns back to musing which you know is a dangerous territory because somehow your mind always returns back to him.

Doyoung

What exactly did you want to be with Doyoung?

You want him to like you? No, You want to mean something to him, to be the special person he runs to whenever he's devastated, to be the first person he calls when he's completely utterly bursting with joy. You want him to be completely aware of your presence that even just a mere mention of your name will evoke something in him, make his heart beat a little faster and cause some flush to bleed through his cheeks.

You want him to be endeared with your habitual tics - how you drum your fingers in every surface when you are in deep thought, a line maring your forehead between your brows and make his lips itch to kiss it. You want him to be captivated with your idiosyncrasies and find it charming, you want him to adore everything about you that made you, distinctly you.

You want him to want you.

Your phone vibrated and interrupted your stupor and upon seeing Doyoung’s name attached to the notification. Your fingers quickly unlocked your phone, fingers ringing from an adrenaline rush just from the sight of his name.

Doyoung:

Come over?

And just like that you inform your cab driver to make a detour and drive to Doyoung’s instead.

Doyoung opened the gigantic door of his penthouse where he found you on the other side of the door, shifting your weight from foot to foot, nervous to be in the same perimeter as him. When the gap was big enough to see you his eyes roved over to your body and noted that you were dressed up nicely for a date. His eyes then turned into slits as he glared at you.

“Have fun with your date?” He questioned and you can see his jaw set - the muscles clenching tight.

You didn’t answer, you don’t want him to know the pathetic evening you spent with Johnny as your mind drifts to thoughts of him; instead of actively participating with Johnny’s effort of back and forth.

As if knowing that you wouldn’t answer, his arms went to grab your forearms pulling you inside and leading you to the stairs up his loft where his bed is, you followed meekly behind him. Reaching his loft you look around and try to commit to memory the layout of the room; promising yourself that this will be the last time you will set foot in this room.

Doyoung attached his lips to your neck which drew a soft moan from you, spurred by your sounds he continued to ravish your neck oscillating between harshly sucking and peppering soft kisses on the expanse of the skin of your neck. His hands running at your sides smoothly and gradually getting closer to the underside of your breasts with each pass, when he finally cupped your mounds you arch in his palms further pushing yourself closer to him, greedy for his attention from all the teasing that he has done.

When he spoke again it fanned over the nape of your neck making your skin tingle from the warmth, “Why can’t you understand that I am the only one who can make you feel this way.” 

You can smell the residue of whisky on his breath and you wanted to taste it on your tongue even though from all the times you have slept with him you two have never kissed. You have drawn the line there for kissing is much more intimate than slapping bodies againsts each other for satisfaction. Kissing can be done without sexual notions but a simple act between couples and it is a glaring truth that you two were not.

You found yourself naked and sprawled on his queen size bed where you have lain your back many times but never spent a night in. Even the off white color of his ceiling is familiar to you as if mocking you for all the times you said you wouldn’t see it again. As he slips your dress down your body, your eyes water and it pooled in your eyes ready to spill over. ‘This is the last time,’ you tell yourself again, 'this is the last time that I will be Doyoung’s beck and call.' When he was finished trailing his lips down and also discarding his clothes at the other side of the bed you managed to swipe the tears that gathered in your eyes and look at him.

Towering over you he was a sight to behold and you trace the line of his body with your eyes, caressing the dips on his collarbones and the line that leads down to his cock as his face coil into a smirk smug with the knowledge that he can turn you into a whimpering mess.

“What do you want?” He asked while splaying his hands on your stomach, his thumb drawing circles on your clit which made your moans even louder and your pussy clench on nothing. You hate that he was the only one who can make you feel this way, reducing you into a pleading mess as you move your hips to the rhythm that he has set. 

You don’t have to tell him your guttural whines already told him what you wanted and he obliged inserting his length into you slowly, while you gripped his sheets until your knuckles turned white. You loved the way he filled you and the burn that accompanies when he stretched your clamping muscles on him.

So you let all your reasoning go because Doyoung’s cock pumping inside you felt good, too good. 

He knows your body like an instrument, putting the right pressure and hitting the spots that makes you throw your head back repeatedly. You can feel the falter in his quick thrusts and knows that he is near his end. Doyoung makes this one sound at the back of his throat when he orgasms … and you follow suit too as he falls apart.

It took a few seconds for him to untangle his legs and arms from your figure and it took you a couple of minutes of staring at the walls, waiting until you felt your legs can support you before you stood up and searched for your dress and undergarments. You can hear the rustle of the sheets as Doyoung sits on his bed watching your back as you slip on your panties and pull your dress back in its place.

“So tell me why did you leave the company?” Doyoung asked, his voice ringing loudly in your ears.

“I told you already I want to work in a big company,” You try to answer nonchalantly.

“Really? Or does it have something to do with me?

“Oh for fuck’s sake Doyoung. The world doesn’t revolve around you!” You shouted at him as you turned around to face him. Your ire rising as you see the cold stoic look on his face - unaffected by your outburst.

“Then why does it feel like you are running away from me?” He stood up from the bed and warily approached you as if you will lash at him any moment.

“I hate you,” (I love you) you whispered under your breath the words not meant from his ears but he heard it anyway. Disbelief painted his features he cannot grasp the reason why you are suddenly acting like this.

He reached out to touch your arm but you swerved his hand like a hurt animal nursing a wound and Doyoung then noticed your bloodshot eyes and defensive stance.

“Don’t touch me. Whatever destructive thing this is Doyoung, I am done. We’re done,” You stated bluntly your voice devoid of emotions a complete contrast with how you hugged yourself tightly with your arms.

“You don’t mean that,” Doyoung said adamantly as color drained from his face, making his pale complexion - paper white. 

“You can’t just walk away,” He added more to convince himself than you because he can see that hard look in your eyes - already set in the decision of walking away from him.

“Watch me Doyoung,” your lips curved into a cruel bitter smile. 

You leave him with those words as he watches your retreating figure until it completely disappears from his line of vision. 

--------

That night when you received a text from Doyoung, you never bothered to open it, opting to delete it and completely block all communications with him. You need to move on and in order to do it you need to sever all ties that might delude you to come back in his arms again.

You need to escape from Kim Doyoung for it's been due too long.

a/n: Read more of my works for NCT here:masterlist

[thetravelerwrites]

Heat (Part 1)

Rating: Explicit Relationships: Female Tabaxi/Male Human/Fem-Intersex Tiefling Additional Tags: Exophilia, Babies, Mention of Pregnancy, Children, Kids, Tabaxi, Tiefling, Intersex, Pregnancy, Fatherhood, In Heat, Mating Cycles, Contraceptive Words: 4311

Rings goes into an intense heat and decides to isolate herself to prevent conceiving a child, whereas Ebert goes on a quest to find rare components to create a stronger contraceptive for her. Commissioned by @ocsmutpocalypse!

Rings had been acting weird. More weird than normal. And her normal weirdness was… pretty weird, by anyone’s standards. She spent a lot of time camping in the woods and snapped at anyone who came near her, including Ebert, Reverence, and her sister. Buttons couldn’t be in the same room as Rings, hissing and spitting at her before scrabbling for the door in a frothing rage.

Ebert hadn’t realized the change in her behavior at first, since Ethrik was a year and a half old, and Ebert’s second child had just been born a few months before, which took up all his attention. The child was like Reverence in that they were between genders and were not old enough to decide which gender they most identified with. Ebert and Reverence decided to name them Evo, short for “evolving,” and figured that they could change their name when they were old enough to choose.

So it was a few days before Ebert noticed her odd behavior and pointed it out to Reverence.

“Ah,” Reverence said, breastfeeding Evo. “Maybe she’s in heat.”

“Heat?” Ebert said, confused. “She’s never gone into heat before.”

“Well, not since you’ve been here, but that’s only been two years. It’s happened twice before, and they were random. Her sister says that Rings normally takes some sort of suppressant which works well enough typically, but every once in a while, the urge gets too strong and her body rebels against her.”

“Huh,” Ebert said. “Well, she takes the birth control medicine that I make, so she should be alright, right?”

Reverence shook her head, patting Evo’s bottom as they suckled. “Biological imperative in her species can be pretty strong, and no birth control is 100% effective. Rings hates the idea of having children more than anything, so the possibility that she might conceive is something she simply cannot tolerate. It’s why she normally secluded herself during her heats. Which is unfortunate for her. The last one was two months long. She came back in very poor shape; it took weeks for her to recover.”

Ebert frowned. “That’s disconcerting. Can nothing be done to help her?”

“According to Spring, if she copulates, the heat passes in a matter of days, but Rings won’t risk it. The idea of motherhood repulses her.”

“I know that all too well,” Ebert said. “I’m going to go to the cottage and see if I can work on something for her. I don’t like the idea of her being isolated for two months, especially since winter is coming soon.”

Reverence nodded and kissed him goodbye, and Ebert trekked into the woods and to the cottage where he did is magical work. As he was walking up, he heard glass break inside the cottage.

Taking out a short sword he’d been given and preparing a fireball, he called out, “Declare yourself!”

“Fuck off!” He heard in response, Rings’ annoyed voice loud enough to rattle the windows in the frame.

“Rings?” He said, dropping his sword and letting the fireball spell fizzle out in disbelief. “What the hell are you doing in there? What did you break?”

“Who cares? Go away!”

“I need my workspace!” Ebert said, putting the key in the door, but it refused to open. He had a feeling Rings was sitting in front of the door. “Reverence told me you’re in heat! I’m going to try and make a new contraceptive for you!”

“What do you know?” Rings yelled, banging against the door as he pushed on it. “Go ask Cassandra! She knows more about herbs and medicine than you do, you quack!”

Ebert grimaced, but he knew she wasn’t wrong. Cassandra was an aasimar and alumnus from his old academy, one who actually graduated and hadn’t committed a crime against nature, like he had. She and her lover had settled in the village less than a month previous.

Her specialty was prophecy and soothsaying, but she was also well versed in magical medicine and herbalism. Ebert was a good physician, but he wasn’t much of an apothecary He’d deferred to her expertise on several occasions, including the production of the original contraceptive. He was lucky she was more interested in working as a fortune teller and not as a medicine maker, or she could have taken half his business, if she’d had a mind to it.

“Yeah, I love you, too!” Ebert retorted, stalking off.

Cassandra lived with her lover, a minotaur named Bigby, near the temple and she did a lot of her business with the visitors. Getting your fortune told right outside of the temple was lucrative for both parties, so Reverence had allowed it as long as Cassandra agreed to support the temple and donate a small percentage of her earnings to the temple every month. Despite being a holy woman who lived a modest life in a small, two room house, Reverence was remarkably business savvy at times.

On the other hand, Bigby loved kids, and he often babysat for the villagers when they made their trips to the temple for a small fee. It was a good way to earn himself income and keep the littler tots out of trouble while their parents did their worshiping, so everyone got something out of the deal.

Cassandra was sitting at a booth that she had set up at the feet of Fysy’s statue outside of the temple. She was in the process of giving a reading to a parishioner, so Ebert waited awkwardly a small distance away for her to finish before approaching.

“Hello, necromancer,” Cassandra said pleasantly, her dark skin shining like bronze in the sunlight. “I’ve been waiting for you to come and see me. You certainly take your sweet time. I was wondering if I’d have to come and seek you out instead.”

“Yes, well,” Ebert said. “Rings is in heat.”

“I know,” She said, smugly magnanimous. “You’ve come to get medicinal advice, yes?”

“I suppose so,” Ebert admitted. “Rings and Reverence implied that the current contraceptive recipe will not be enough to override her body’s biological imperative. I need something stronger.”

“The recipe you have is pretty strong,” Cassandra said. “It would work for most mortal beings. Though, I will admit that Tabaxi bodies are very hardy and can expel most poisons with no effect to themselves. It’s no wonder that a normal recipe wouldn’t work for them.” She rubbed her chin. “There are a few herbs I know of that are effective. Bloodwort is one, and the bark of the red cedar is another. Bloodwort isn’t too hard to find, but red cedar isn’t native to this region. To find it, you’ll have to travel northwest for at least a week.” She stood up and came around the table, motioning to him to follow her. “Come.”

She led him to her home, where Bigby was chasing a passel of children around in the yard, pausing momentarily to raise a hand in greeting only to be set upon by many tiny hands, pushing him on his stomach and piling on.

“Here,” Cassandra said, pulling down a book. “This is a picture of the herbs I mentioned. When you find them, combine it with fennel seed, chasteberry, raspberry leaf, thistle, and red clover flowers. Boil on a low setting in clear water for at least three days, and add the decotion to a berry wine. Three tablespoons per day until the next cycle starts.”

Ebert pulled out his notebook and began to draw copies of each of the plants, writing down the recipe underneath the sketches.

“There’s an unusual symptom of this decotion, however,” Cassandra continued. “It doesn’t happen in humans, but in beastfolk, like tabaxis, it can cause an increase in sex drive. It’s still effective as a contraceptive in beastfolk, but it forces them to experience the worst of the heat in order to surpass it. I’d advise you to discuss it with Rings before making the trip. She may not appreciate the side effects.”

“I’ll do that,” Ebert said. “Although… Rings is usually my partner on these types of trips… I can’t imagine--”

“Going alone?” Cassandra said, finishing his sentence. “Then don’t. Certainly, Rings is a capable woman, but she’s not the only one. Her sister is also quite capable, and she would understand the urgency, especially considering she’s gone through a heat herself.”

“That’s true,” Ebert said. “I’ll ask Rings. Thanks, Cass.”

“It’s no trouble,” Cassandra replied pleasantly. “Give the children a kiss for me.”

Ebert waved and set off back to the cabin.

“Rings,” He said once he returned. Rings was still sitting against the door and refused to let him inside. “I spoke to Cassandra. I have to take a trip to get the ingredients she told me about. I’ll be gone for a few weeks.”

“Okay,” She said. She sounded much more subdued than normal.

“Listen,” Ebert started, sitting awkwardly on the steps. “Cassandra said that the herbs have a strange side effect on beast people. It forces them to the peak of their heat and makes them more… needy. The heat passes faster, but… the urge to… procreate… gets stronger. Uncontrollable. I just wanted to be sure it’s something you’re willing to deal with.”

“I don’t know,” She said after a moment. “If that’s the case… Will you and Reverence shelter with me until it’s over? If I’m going to end up in the family way… I’d prefer it if the kid belonged to you or her. I trust the two of you more than anyone else. I know me; it’s just not in me to be a parent. I won’t care for the kid. But you two will. And that’s good enough for me.”

“We can do that,” Ebert said. “I’m sure Reverence would agree. I’ll discuss it with her before I leave, to be sure. I’m going to see if Spring will accompany me on this trip. She understands this better than me, after all.”

“That’ll be good,” Rings agreed. “She hasn’t been out of the village since we came here.” Ebert heard her laugh. “Make sure Flicker doesn’t get the wrong idea. Unless you’re planning on seducing Springs on the trip.”

“Gross. I’m not into sisters, thanks. And Flicker could rip me in half, so I’m not risking it.”

Flickering Flame was a Bengal tiger tabaxi soldier from a far off desert country and was in a relationship with Spring. He worked as a guard, protecting the village from hostile outsiders. Though Spring was monogamous and had chosen not to follow Fysy, Flicker was a disciple of Fysy and worshiped at the temple, an arrangement they had agreed on when they decided to become engaged.

“Yeah, that’s true. He would rip you in half. It would be funny,” Rings said, laughing in a subdued way.

“Are you okay?” Ebert asked in concern.

She sighed. “I’m anxious. I’m never anxious, and I hate it. And I’ve never had to worry about who I had sex with or when. I don’t feel like myself and I don’t like it.”

“We’re going to fix it,” Ebert said softly. “Even if I have to go alone. As fun as it is to see you squirm… I miss you. The real you.”

“I miss me, too,” She said. “When are you leaving?”

“As soon as I talk to Spring,” He replied. “Probably tomorrow morning. I don’t want to delay too long.”

“Reverence is okay with it?” She asked.

“I haven’t talked to her yet, but I don’t imagine she’d be opposed to it. She’s not exactly restrictive or controlling.”

“True. And she can’t leave the village. She hasn’t set foot outside of the town’s boundary since she became the priestess decades ago.”

“I keep meaning to ask her the story behind that, but I’ve never had the opportunity. I heard she came from some place far away. I wonder how she ended up here.”

“I’ve never heard the full story, either,” Rings said. “Let’s ask her when you get back. It seems the three of us will be spending several days together, after all.”

Ebert struggled to his feet and brushed off his trouser. “I’m going to get going. I want to make arrangements before sundown.”

“Hey.”

“What?”

A heartbeat of time passed before she said, in a very quiet voice. “Be safe, okay? Don’t get killed, or I’ll be very angry with you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” He said, chuckling.

“I’m serious,” She said, banging the door. “You’re useless without me.”

Ebert began to set off down the trail. “Don’t forget to eat.”

It didn’t take much to convince Spring to go with Ebert on his sojourn. She asked Bigby to look after Candle until she returned, and Bigby was happy to comply. Ebert also discussed having Bigby watch his tots when he returned and sheltered with Rings during her heat, and he was amiable.

Reverence was sympathetic to Ring’s plight and immediately agreed to help, offering to go to Rings at the cabin while Ebert was gone and satisfy her in ways that didn’t lead to children in the meantime. It wouldn’t be enough to end her heat, but it would keep her from losing her senses in the midst of an uncontrollable influx of hormones.

Spring met Ebert outside of her house the next morning wearing a practical traveling outfit with a sword strapped to her back.

“I wasn’t aware you owned a sword,” Ebert said, impressed.

“It’s Flicker’s,” She said. “I’m just borrowing it. I’m only glad he had one that suited a person my size. Of course, he calls it a letter opener.”

Ebert snorted. “You’re ready, then?”

“Yeah,” She replied, hitching up her pack. “We should follow the river until we hit open terrain. I’m familiar with the smell of red cedar, so finding it shouldn’t be as difficult as it would be without a tracker.”

“That’s definitely useful. Have you said farewell to Rings?”

“No, but I don’t think she’d welcome my company at the moment. I’ll greet her when we return.”

Fair enough. “Let’s head out.”

Traveling with Spring wasn’t as awkward or unpleasant as Ebert worried it could have been, especially considering the two of them weren’t necessarily close, despite his having lived in the village for several years by this point. The only time they really spoke was when he accompanied Rings or Reverence to dinner at Spring’s house.

He discovered that Spring was a good conversationalist and knew a lot about wilderness survival techniques, perhaps even more than Rings, which was reassuring, because Ebert knew fuck all about that.

Though she reminded Ebert of Rings in a number of ways, she was more even-keel and mellow-tempered than her sister. Whatever affection he might have developed for her during their trek, it definitely wasn’t attraction. More like a close friend or sibling, which actually relieved him. He hadn’t been close to any of his siblings, so having a familial relationship with someone was both unfamiliar and refreshing.

“The air is getting colder,” Spring said, pulling her scarf around her more tightly as they walked. “Another day, and we should be in the right area.”

“Great,” Ebert said in relief. “I hate camping.”

Spring snorted. “Yeah, I kinda figured. You do most of your grumbling right before bed.”

“I don’t mean to grumble,” He said, slightly embarrassed.

Spring laughed again. “You do it mostly under your breath, but I have good hearing.” Her feline ears flicked back and forth. “I honestly find it rather amusing. You remind me of Candle sometimes.”

“...thanks?”

“I just mean you like things a certain way. Candle is like that, too.” She hacked a branch out of her way. “Most children are.”

“Insinuating that I behave like a child?”

“I don’t mean it in a negative way. Rings is very similar. I think it’s just a side effect of not having a very good childhood. Rings hasn’t told me much about your childhood, but it’s easy enough to assume that it wasn’t a happy one, and you already know hers was terrible.”

“That’s true,” He admitted.

“We all need certain things when we’re children, chief among them is attention,” She said pensively. “Children grumble and gripe and make a fuss, and it seems irritating, but what they’re really asking for is attention. If you don’t get enough when you’re young, you grow up desperate for it. Rings acts out because she likes attention. I don’t think you necessarily want people to pay attention to you, but I think you do want people to listen. If you didn’t, I think you wouldn’t grumble out loud. People only make noise when they want someone to hear it, after all.”

“What are you, a philosopher?” Ebert laughed.

“Aren’t all mothers?” Spring replied, laughing herself.

The next day, as they were trekking near a treeline, Spring stopped and sniffed the air.

“I smell bloodroot,” She said. “It’s not far away. A few hundred meters, maybe.”

“Any whiff of red cedar yet?”

“No, but it likely won’t be long now. Bloodroot and red cedar are native to the same region.”

“Well, let’s collect as much as we can carry while we’re here. I don’t want to have to make another trip any time soon.”

They spent most of the afternoon plucking bloodroot plants, hoping there were seeds they could sow when they returned to the village. Another few hours travel before nightfall brought them to a grove with red cedar.

“Fucking finally,” Ebert sighed. “I was worried we’d have to travel another day to find this.”

“It is getting late, as it is,” Spring said, looking toward the setting sun. “It’d be best to set up camp now and harvest what we need in the morning.”

“Uuuugh,” Ebert groaned, throwing his head back dramatically, and Spring smiled at him in a fond, maternal sort of way.

Spring set about building a fire pit while Ebert looked for firewood from the nearby brush. He found valuable mushrooms and some lichen that would be useful as components and harvested those while he was at it, then returned to the clearing where they’d made camp.

“It doesn’t smell like rain tonight, which is good. I don’t feel like putting up the tent.”

Ebert groaned. “I don’t like sleeping in the open air.”

“Then you set up the tent,” She retorted.

Ebert’s groan deepened. “It’s not so bad, I guess.”

“That’s what I thought.” She sat down at the newly built fire and put the cooking grate over it, setting a small pot on top of the grate and pouring water into it from her canteen. “Wanna cut up the onions and potatoes for the stew? I still have some jerky left, but I should hunt tomorrow for the trip back.”

“Yeah, sure,” Ebert said with a heavy sigh, settling himself with difficulty on the ground, setting his cane down next to him, and opening the drawstring pouch that contained their food supply. “One each, eh?”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” She said.

“So, has Rings ever gone through heat like this before?” Ebert asked as he peeled the vegetables. “I’ve been meaning to ask, but I keep forgetting. This one seems severe.”

“She’s had a couple of heats since reaching adulthood, but not this bad,” Spring replied, tearing the jerky into small strips and throwing it into the pot. “It’s only as bad as this because Rings isn’t used to suppressing her urges. She’s always been impulsive and opportunistic. If she wants something, whether it’s food, money, sex, or whatever, she either takes it from wherever it’s most readily available or finds someone willing to give it to her, and she never hesitates. It’s why Fysy’s village suits her so well. Ordinarily.”

“True,” Ebert mused. “So stubborn. You’re older than her, right?”

Springs snorted. “By, like, three minutes. We’re from the same litter.”

“You two have such different personalities,” Ebert remarked.

“She’d hate to admit it, but she takes after our parents in temperament. I’m sure that’s one of the reasons she has no interest in having children; she hates the idea of turning out like them. That and she hates kids.”

“Yes,” Ebert replied. “Honestly, so did I, before I met Reverence. I mean, I still hate kids, but I like my kids. I guess I expected to turn out like my family. They were not in any way affectionate or sentimental, and up until Ethrik was born, I was the same way. I’d never have believed being a father was a possibility for me, let alone being a good father or enjoying my time with my children. Life has taken quite the unexpected turn.”

“Do you think Rings should have children, then?”

“Oh, Gods, no,” Ebert laughed. “Granted, I love my children, but I will admit it’s not an experience everyone needs. You know as well as I that suddenly being responsible for a living, breathing life you created is terrifying and not something every person wants to or is capable of handling. Rings is right to think that she wouldn’t raise the kid. She can’t deal with that level of responsibility. Her freedom and autonomy is too important to her, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I agree,” Spring said. “It’s one of the reasons I accepted you invitation to come on this journey. I thought of anyone, you would understand her best and not attempt to sway her opinions or plans for the future. You get her. I appreciate that, as her sister. Not many people do. I’d say even Reverence doesn’t understand Rings as well as you, for all they’ve known each other longer. It’s simply a fundamental difference in their personality.”

“You mean Rings hating kids and Reverence having so many?”

“Not just that,” She mused. “Reverence is the priestess of the goddess of love and fertility. Rings is fine with the first part, not so much the second. Though Rings loves Reverence, their difference in philosophies will always be at odds with each other. That’s why I think you’re good for them. You get them in different ways, and you can mediate if they ever argue.”

“Have they ever argued?” Ebert asked, surprised. “I’ve never witnessed it. Which is strange, because Rings loves to argue.

Spring snickered. “Typically, Rings respects Reverence enough to keep her criticisms to herself, but they had a brief falling out a few years back. Reverence was pregnant, again, and Rings got tired of it.”

“But Reverence never keeps the children, except for mine, and those were special circumstances.”

“Rings didn’t care; she felt like Reverence saw herself as nothing more than a brood mare and had no self-respect. Reverence, on the other hand, feels like making children is her sacred duty, and thus felt as though Rings was insulting her calling in life, and Fysy by extension. The parted ways for almost two months.”

“Oh, gods, it must have been serious,” Ebert said, surprised. “What happened?”

“Rings and I had a discussion about why I decided to keep Candle, even though he was conceived in the throes of an unplanned, unprepared-for heat with a deadbeat, what being a mother means to me specifically, if I wanted more children, that sort of thing. I think it helped her understand Reverence a little better. It’s the one and only time I ever heard of Rings apologizing.”

“I’m glad they made up,” Ebert replied. “I don’t know what my life would be like without both of them, and it’s not a thought I want to entertain.”

Spring smiled fondly. “Me, neither. Reverence is like a sister to me, as well. She gave me and my family a home and helped us start a new life. I owe her a lot.”

“As do I,”  Ebert said softly with a sigh, reaching for a spoon to eat the stew right from the pot. “Let’s eat and go to bed, I’m exhausted. I want to get out of here as early as possible.”

Now that they had what they needed, the trip home took much less time, and they arrived back within the town proper in five days. He stopped by Reverence’s house, only to find that Bigby was keeping the children, with all of them on the floor passing a leather ball to each other in turn. Tiny little Evo was sandwiched between Bigby’s legs to keep them upright, squealing delightedly when the ball came close only to kick it out of their reach. Buttons sat in the very center, swatting lazily at the ball as it rolled past her.

Ebert realized from Reverence’s absence that she must be keeping Rings company. Spring collected Candle and excused herself, inviting Ebert and the women over for dinner once Rings was back to her old self.

Ebert went out to the cabin that was well away from most of the town, one of the reasons he liked it so much, and heard moaning issuing from inside. Ah. He’d guessed correctly. He reached up and knocked.

“Fuck off!” Rings cried out.

“It’s me! I’m back!”

“I don’t care! Fuck off!”

“I have a key, you know!”Ebert shouted. “I can let myself in at any time, I was just being considerate!”

“Then let yourself in, the fuck if I care!”

Ebert rolled his eyes and sighed. “I can’t work with the two of you going at it. I’ll start the medicine at home. I’ll be at the house when you’re done.”

“Whatever, go away!”

Snorting derisively, Ebert set back off for home.

Since my work is no longer searchable, please do me a favor and reblog this story if you enjoyed it. Help me reach a wider audience! To help me continue creating, please consider buying me a Kofi, becoming a Patron, or donating directly to my PayPal!

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My Masterlist

The Exophilia Creator’s Masterlist

[tardytothepardy]

Fruits Basket - Vol 22

The snowball that has been tumbling down a hill for these last several books is finally rolling to a halt. I wonder how Akito feels about it. Surely she's not gonna become upset.

Today we arrive with Kyo to Kyo's house, after being told by Hanajima that there's something he needs to do before he can see Tohru. He needs to talk to his dad, and it's gonna be the first time in a long time that he's done it. He's nervous as all hell, he feels nauseous just standing at the front door, but he still follows through. The second his father sees him, he's already in a rage. He yells at the servant(?) who let Kyo in, then zeroes straight on Kyo after Kyo asks why he's home in the first place, it's the middle of the workday, isn't it?

Kyo's father (he never gets a name, as far as I can tell) says that he wasn't feeling well, and it's Kyo's fault because,,, his mom died. Yup, makes sense. After all this time, Kyo's father still rants and raves and insists that it was Kyo's fault that his mother died, and Kyo says, "Yeah, I know it is." Kyo's father starts cackling, asking the servant if she also heard Kyo saying that, then asking for someone to call up the main Sohma house, to get Kyo and throw him in the dungeon (it's not actually a dungeon but I'll always think of it like that), but Kyo says he won't go there. He won't even step foot in that room, because he's going to live outside, because he met someone and he really cares about her, and he wants to be around her for the rest of his life. Naturally, Kyo's father rejects that, saying that there's no way the family would allow that, there's no way that Kyo can go off and try to have a normal life after "what he did", throwing his family into shame by being born (because he totally chose to be the cat, this is common knowledge), and he asks why Kyo's mother had to give birth to Kyo in the first place, which makes Kyo freeze up. He's heard that phrase before, when he was a kid. He hadn't realized it before, but after hearing his father say it, he realizes that it was his father that said it to his mother, "Why did you have to give birth to such a child?". Right in front of said child, by the way. Clearly the man did not and does not care. Kyo asks his father if he was the one who said it, which makes Kyo's father lash out again, how dare Kyo insinuate that he (Kyo's father) is the reason that Kyo's mother (why did neither of these people get a name ;-;) committed suicide, there's no way it's his fault, there was never anything he said or did that would make her do that, obviously, how could Kyo even vaguely say something that could be construed as such, and clearly it is not his fault but Kyo's! It has to be Kyo's fault, it simply has to!

Probably during all that screaming, Kyo thinks about how much he wishes his mom was happy, that she had never felt the way she did that led to her suicide. As a kid, it was difficult for him to understand, but now he does, not that it makes much of a difference. Whether he understood or not, she's still gone.

Finally, Kyo pushes his father away, saying that he won't give up on himself, and that he wants to make the most of his life while he still has it. His father again objects, and tries to grab Kyo, who deflects pretty easily (whoa it's almost like he's been trained for most of his life for scenarios vaguely similar to this) and his father just starts screaming that Kyo is going to kill him. You know what Kyo is doing? He's just pushing away his father's hand. That's it. His father is still screaming bloody murder (which is what he seems to think is gonna happen to him) when the scene jumps to Akito talking to one of the head maids, talking about Kyo, about if they should get someone to take him away, but Akito says that she wants that place destroyed. The maid asks if she thinks Kyo's father will approve, but Akito basically says, "It doesn't matter what he approves, I've decided it will be destroyed." After that, the maid notes that Akito has changed, and that she liked Akito before, but Akito doesn't care. Change, don't change, she'll be trying to progress and move on, even if some people around her object to it. Generally, there seems to be a lot of introspective going on for both of them.

Then we change to see Hiro and Kisa, who is reassuring Hiro that it's not a bad thing that his curse broke, and that no one is going to hate him because of it. If anything, she's happy for him, and is glad that he told her first, out of anyone else. Hiro asks if Kisa hates him now that he isn't part of the Juunishi anymore, and she asks him if he thinks of her any different because she still is. Midway through reassuring Kisa that that wasn't the case, Kyo announces his presence by vomiting behind some bushes. Hiro exclaims how gross that was (I'm not putting that against him, he has no way of really knowing (or understanding) why Kyo did that), and Kisa offers Kyo a tissue, and Kyo straight up basically hallucinates seeing Tohru. (Dang,, he's really affected by all this. He's, if you don't mind me saying this, down bad. Really bad.)

Kyo tries to visit Tohru again, but Hanajima and Uotani block his way completely. I would go into why but I've already said it, but one thing that does happen is that Hanajima and Uotani run into or meet (or something) Akito, who tells them that she's the reason that Tohru had those cuts, and kinda why she got hurt in the first place. She's also the reason why Kureno is in the hospital. Naturally, Akito is very ashamed of this, but surprisingly, Uotani and Hanajima are pretty cool about it. Hanajima tells Akito that Tohru isn't blaming anyone for the incident, so it's better if Akito not beat herself up so much over it, because it definitely won't make Tohru feel any better. As Akito was admitting what she'd done to Kureno, Hanajima straight up asked her if she was a girl, and when Akito didn't say no, suddenly things clicked into place: when Kureno was talking about having to stay by the side of a girl, Akito was that girl. This realization seems to mostly be on Uotani's side, who is also thinking about how much Kureno really means to her. I mean, she interacted with him a handful of times, and that was a while ago. She doesn't really know much about him, only that he seems to have a similar demeanor to Tohru, that sort of blind kindness kinda thing.

Uotani later goes to talk to Kureno, and he says that, to help Akito move on, he needs to leave, go far away. Uotani offers to go with him (after graduation and stuff), because she luh-luh-likes him (she refuses to say it), so that's nice.

Meanwhile, (more like after? Idk, timey wimey stuff) Kyo is heading to Kazuma's house, and he sees Akito walking out the front gate. Huh? What the fuck is Akito doing there? Kyo goes to confront Akito, but all she says is that he can live whatever life he wants to, and she refuses to clarify. Right before the bickering can start, who but Hanajima opens the front gate, asking if Akito is really leaving so soon? (She even uses a nickname, which Akito isn't the biggest fan of) Naturally, that freaks out Kyo. What is that girl doing here? Is she friends with Akito? How did that happen? When did that happen? Then Kazuma pops up, and Hanajima again acts familiar and friendly with him?! How does she do that that's so fucking weird!

Kazuma tells Kyo that he knows that Kyo went to talk to his dad, and that Akito knows as well. He also says that Akito plans for that dungeon room to be destroyed which is nice. Kazuma says that fixing relations between the main house or his personal family won't be so easy, but it was a nice start.

Jumping ahead a little, it seems that Akito has called all of the Juunishi (even Kyo, and we all know how rare that is) to the main Sohma house. She has something that she needs to tell them, and they have no guesses. Haru says that Akito seems to have changed since the whole incident with Tohru and stuff, which is a welcome change, even if it's still strange and confusing. (Personally, in that situation I would definitely have bated breath, because when there's a person that usually is disagreeable at best suddenly changes to being nice, all I can ever do is just wait for them to go back to being nasty. I just can't trust it when people switch like that, it's eerie)

Yuki then tells Kyo that Tohru's getting out of the hospital soon, which causes Kyo to speed off to Hanajima and Uotani, asking if now he can finally see Tohru. They say, "yeah, yeah," then ask him what outfits (because they're paging through a magazine) would look best on Tohru. Kyo has no fucking idea, Tohru could probably wear anything and he'd be fine with it.

Meanwhile, it seems that Yuki has some jealousy(?) concerning Tohru and Kyo. It's mostly because both parties know about the whole zodiac thing, but between him and Machi, that's not the case. There's a considerable risk that the secret came out, or that he tells Machi, and she finds it too weird and she breaks off any little relationship that is starting to grow between them. It'd probably just drop back to acquaintances, or worse: awkward acquaintances, where everyone asks what happened, weren't you guys close? Ugh. That sounds terrible.

So anyway, Yuki's busy worrying about that, it's a whole thing. I think he kinda tries to tell Machi at some point, but Kimi busts in asking about her hairbrush. And though he doesn't succeed in telling Machi, he knows that he has to, because this is a pretty big thing to hide from someone. It's probably difficult and straining to be a couple and you refuse to let your partner be physically close to you without ever telling them why. (Just panic and say that you have an allergy to human skin and admit that you're in complete misery because of it, it's fine, nbd)

The scene switches to Akito talking to Shigure, telling him that she's going to end the whole Juunishi thing. She's tired of all of it at this point, of people treating her the way they do because she's "God". She says that everyone (though I suppose in this scene she's saying this to Shigure specifically) will be released from her, that everyone can go and do whatever they want to do. Shigure says that if that's the case, then he'll be relieved. (I know he's teasing and all, but like, dude, can you maybe not right now?) He gives her a "farewell gift", which she looks fairly distraught about, but we won't see what it is yet, because now I have to describe Kyo's general panick over seeing Tohru again.

So yeah, the day that Tohru is released from the hospital, somehow Kyo almost seemed to forget about it until Yuki brought it up. Yuki wouldn't be going along though, because he has something else to do.

On the way to the hospital, Kyo's just rethinking all the stuff that he's said and that has been said to him throughout this whole thing. Yuki told him to just act normal, the fuck even is normal now? How does he do that? Will Tohru forgive him? What even does he like about Tohru? Does he still like her? What does he like about her? How much about that thing does he like? He has no fucking idea, how does he even talk to her? Then he sees her, none of that shit matters. The only thing that does matter is that he loves her goddammit.

Unfortunately for that romantic moment, the second Tohru sees Kyo, she dashes off. He gives chase after a moment of "oh jeez ;-;".

The perspective shifts to Tohru. She apparently didn't mean to run, her feet just went on their own. It isn't what she meant to do, she did want to see Kyo again, but who has control over their bodies in highly emotional moments anyway? She told herself that when she next saw him, she was going to smile. She practiced doing so, or that what she thought anyway. There's a moment where we see Yuki talking to Tohru while she's still bedridden, and when he tries (very hesitantly) to bring up Kyo, she changes the topic pretty quickly, along with crying literally at his name. It hurts her so much to hear it. She thinks that she's a burden by being unable to let go of everyone. She thinks she needs to move from Kyo after what he said, but she just can't. She meant what she said that she would stay by Kyo's side, even if it turns out he doesn't like her. She tried to not let it bother her, but clearly that didn't happen.

Finally, Kyo catches up to her (a second time, she pushed him away twice in that fantastic emotional upheaval), and she's crying. She's desperately trying to stop, she doesn't want to be a burden, she doesn't want him to hate her, stop crying! He takes her hand, and apologizes for all his bs. He says that he was only thinking about himself, about his own regrets. He ignored her feelings, and he says that he should've known better: the world doesn't give second chances, but he's taking this chance to try to apologize. He then says those magic words that Tohru did not think he'd say at all: he wants to be with her, he doesn't want anyone else, because he loves her. (Holy shit, they both love each other? Now this is a game changer, for sure)

Tohru's completely shocked, and can only muster tiny soft questions like "does that mean i can stay with you?" and "can i hold your hand?" with lots of ellipses, because shock. Kyo points out that she's already holding his hand, and then he kisses her (She does know that that's their second kiss, right? No? Hm, Kyo feels awkward about that). Kyo then pulls her to her feet (she was sitting on a garden wall thingie), and asks if they can hug, despite the whole cat thing. He says he thinks that the curse will probably become an inconvenience to her, but Tohru says that she loves him, and that it doesn't matter, everything will work out. And so they hug and,,,,

nothing happens.

The fuck?!

Before we get to the hug, we get a quick flashback to when Akito visited Tohru in the hospital. Akito admits that she was jealous of Tohru, and that she thinks that Tohru is prettier than herself. Tohru denies that, and asks that Akito not categorize things like that, because when you think like that, you just "use them to seperate yourself out", in her words. She says that she is not without blame, that Akito was just living her life as best she could, despite all the bad stuff that was happening to her. She destroyed Akito's world, essentially, and whether or not it was for better or worse, she still acknowledges that she ended up hurting Akito, a lot.

It goes back to the present, still with Akito, as the curse is breaking for so many of the Juunishi, Kyo, Ayame, Ritsu, Kisa, Kagura, Izusu, Haru, Hatori, and lastly Shigure (no i'm not forgetting anyone, the story isn't finished), and she's telling her father (who is, if you have forgotten, quite dead) that she doesn't have to be "god" anymore, that she can just be herself. She's still scared by that idea, because she is aware of how many people she's hurt, and she doesn't think she has any redeeming qualities, she's just alone, scared, and hurt. After showing all of these people's curse breaking, it circles back to the hospital, where Tohru is again offering her friendship to Akito, so that, if Akito truly feels she has nothing else, then at least she can have that.

Back to Tohru and Kyo, after they hug and he doesn't turn into a cat, it's a feeling of shock, but then Kyo tears off his bracelet, and it breaks, the beads going everywhere, and he doesn't turn into anything. I personally have a very small idea of how fucking elated he must have been about that. This lifelong burden, somehow worse than what the other Juunishi had to deal with, something that he's been shunned for (as if he had any choice in the matter), and now it's gone. It's all done, he doesn't have to worry about that anymore.

Now, before Kyo went off to see Tohru, Yuki mentioned that he had something to do. That Something(tm) was calling Machi, and meeting up. He's planning on telling her about the whole Juunishi thing, just get it out in the air. He feels kinda weird, indescribably, but he figures he's just nervous. Before he can think about it, Machi shows up. This is it: this is when he tells her-- whoa what? There's a little rat (probably a voice in his head, the rat spirit, something like that), and it tells him that he's the last. It thanks him for keeping the promise, and bids him goodbye, walking to the other spirits. Whoa. That's intense. How do you even begin to explain that?

Then, we see the story of the Juunishi, how it started in the first place: There was once this dude who lived all alone, at the top of a mountain. Even after going down the mountain, and seeing other people, he was still alone. Despite having a lot of power and experience and memories, he knew that he was unlike other people, and developed a fear of other people, of getting hurt, and of being different than others. One day, a cat showed up, and said that it had been watching the dude for a while, and it wanted to be by his side, and so it did. This made the dude (he's God, should I just refer to him as "God" rather than "the dude"? Probably) very happy, and he thought that if he can get along fine with one, why not more? Who wouldn't want more happiness? So he made and sent out a bunch of invitations for a nice banquet, and some animals came to it: a dog, a ram, a dragon, a monkey, a rat, a snake, an ox, a horse, a bird, a rabbit, a boar, and a tiger. They all collected and all had a fun banquet for many nights.

Suddenly though, the cat fell over, and everyone was distraught. There's was nothing to be done, his life had run out. This was a reminder that death is inevitable, and can happen before you're ready. This upset all of them, and so God prepared a drink and had the cat drink it. It was the thing that created the bond, and he said that however times that everyone there is born, or dies, they will all be together, and they will always be friends, until the end of time. Everyone agreed to it, and the rat was the first to drink, and the rest followed in their sequential order. After the last had drank, the cat started to cry, and asked why God had forced him to drink, saying that he didn't want eternity. No one had expected this response, and they scolded the cat for it. He continued, saying that he knows that death is scary, but it is important to accept that things come to an end, and that he was happy that he met God. If there was a time when they met again in another life, he wanted it to be a natural thing, and to be surrounded with more than those who were sort of forced to be there.

No one wanted to hear those words, however, and the cat died alone. Eventually, one by one, they started to die, leaving God alone once again. But once his time came, he wasn't afraid, because it meant that he could once again see his friends.

Seeing how that story of friendship had over time been twisted into a curse, a burden, kinda sucks, to be honest. The best of intentions don't always work out though.

Now we're pulled back to Yuki and Machi, who is pretty confused. Yuki tries to explain, that he just said goodbye to someone who has been with him his whole life, and despite it being unpleasant to deal with, he's still emotional about them leaving. He is glad that they have left, because he now has freedom. Freedom to do what, you may ask? To hug Machi, which is exactly what he does. I suppose this is some kinda scandalous pda or something because it shows people walking by blushing or whatever. Maybe it's just the American culture in me, but I wouldn't look twice if I saw something like that. (Whoa, it's almost as if different places have different standards and views and cultures, holy shit) After that, Machi asks if she can use his name (because she's always called him "President" up until now), he says she can, they kiss, it's a whole thing. Very cute stuff. (sorry i summarized that so quickly, idk how to talk about that stuff lmao 😳😬)

I'll just leave it there for now, move onto the next, and last, book.

[danishmiilk]

if it isn’t too late 💋💄

pairing || mark lee x fem!reader

au || best friends to lovers!au

genre || fluff; angst

word count || 2.2k

warnings || swearing (i think)

summary || your best friend leaves for Canada, taking a piece of your heart along with him. you liked him, but rejected him. is it too late for you to take him back?

“are you really going to Canada?”

“yeah. i’m going to college there, remember?”

you sighed, having repeated this conversation more times than you’d wanted to the previous week. letting your eyes land on mark’s apologetic expression, you lamented the fact that you’d never gotten to do what you’d always wanted to before he left. he hadn’t left, not yet, but you’d never have the courage to do it, never again. 

“y/n? don’t cry, okay? i’ll still be back every summer to spend time with you.” 

it’s not the same, you thought, but merely sighed and leaned back against the headboard. your best friend sat on the opposite side of the bed, looking at you like he was sorry for his choice, but at the same time didn’t regret it. there was a hint of sympathy and sadness in his posture, and something else, almost longing. you shrugged it off, merely reaching over to hug him before saying, “let’s move on to a happier topic, okay?”

it was hard for you to accept that your best friend for all eighteen years of your life was leaving for Canada, oceans away from you. you’d tried to come to terms with it, but imagining a lifetime without mark was almost awkward and impossible. 

you’d miss the late-night talks, the all-nighters before exams, the walks on the beach and the times you’d played together in the kindergarten sand pit (even when you’d both graduated.) you’d lament about not being able to attend college with mark, and only being able to see him once a year.

but most of all, you’d lament that you’d never gotten to tell him your secret (and you were sure, unreciprocated) feelings for him. you’d planned to tell him this year on his birthday, but on that same day when you’d finally been able to gather the courage to confess, he’d dropped the bombshell on you. you decided there was no point in confessing to him, because even if he did reciprocate your feelings, which you sorely doubted would happen, you’d only be able to date him for two months. fate didn’t allow for a relationship between you and mark, you thought. 

and so you pushed the feelings away, back into the depths of your heart. where they’d stayed for a very long time. where they would stay for a very long time. 

you swore to murder whoever had woken you up at this ungodly hour. it was 4.a.m. in the morning, for god’s sake. who was even awake at this time? and who was awake and free enough to come and wake you up? grumbling in the dim light, you slapped your failing right arm lazily around the bed before finally managing to find your phone (and hurting your pinky).

squinting to let your eyes adjust to the light of your phone, you clicked on the sinning chat. 

mark lee 🥰🥳

- hello hellooooooooo

- meet me at the swings in the park please i have something important to tell youuuu

me

- can’t it wait please?? it’s like four am in the fucking morning

mark lee 🥰🥳

- nooooo i’m leaving in two weeks we don’t!! HAVE!! TIME!!

not having the energy to do anything other than leave him on read, you stifled a yawn and pulled on a sweater with blurry vision. you weren’t sure if you’d even put it on correctly, but you were too tired to care. 

after a face wash, you’d gotten slightly more awake and managed to gather the will and motivation to drag your tired limbs to the park which you’d spent most of your childhood at- and the place where you’d met your best friend for the first time.

cliche as it was, you halted your steps and rocked to and fro on the spot when you saw the boy waiting for you. a hoodie and jeans, with the hood pulled over his hair- very typical clothing for mark. he was just sitting on the swing, twisting the chains around each other then letting them go, spinning himself around on the swing. an admittedly childish act, but… he was so beautiful. you cringed inwardly from the cheesiness of your thoughts, but your heart sang a different song. 

your heart was happy, its beat erratic. you felt as if you were reliving the time so long ago, the time that you fell in love with him. the scene was almost perfect, perfect for a late-night confession. you didn’t want to get your hopes up, though. he was leaving in a fortnight. if only he wasn’t. if only.

the leaves that were blown into your face by the autumn breeze elicited a squawk out of you, alerting mark to your presence. searching his face for anything other than his usual awkwardness for a hint on why you were called here at this hour, you saw nothing but a hint of nervousness, uncharacteristic of mark. 

“so? what’s the matter, mark?”

the ever-present smile on his face suddenly vanished. fiddling with his thumbs, his shoelaces, the hem of his sweater and everything else, before finally speaking softly and haltingly, “well, i’ve kind of… liked you? for a while now? like a few years? and i’ve never been able to tell you this but… i’m leaving soon, and if you reject me then i can just… leave and… maybe it won’t hurt so much.”

“and what if i reciprocated your feelings?” you asked in a whisper. 

“you wouldn’t.”

“why are you making decisions for me? i do. i do like you back. i have for a long time now,” you reached your hand up to wipe moistness from your eyes, unsure of why you were even crying in the first place, in relief or regret, “we’ve wasted so much time.”

a hopeful expression began to show on mark’s face, like the sun peeking out from behind the storm clouds, “so… will you be my girlfriend, then?”

your heart broke. you wanted to date him, but at the same time you didn’t think you’d be able to handle a long-distance relationship. “i… can’t. it’s the distance. you’re going to- to- Canada. i’m staying here. i can’t handle this kind of relationship. and fate- fate obviously didn’t mean for us to be together. if it’s sending you off to Canada and it’s leaving me here… its intention was never to let us enjoy any relationship other than friendship.”

when disappointment flashed across his face, you nearly dropped everything and took back what you just said. “it’s- it’s fine- i just thought we could try at it- nevermind,” mark shook his head, “it was a stupid idea, forget i said anything. anyway… i’m sorry for calling you out here so late. i’ll just get going.”

i’m sorry, you thought desperately, i’m sorry. i’m sorry i’m not strong or brave enough to attempt a long distance relationship, i’m sorry i’m not courageous enough to take risks. having known mark for such a long time, you read him as easily as your favourite childhood book, and now, sadness and heartbreak were written in his every step. away from you.

you didn’t feel like going home, not yet. sitting down on the same swing mark had been on just a few moments ago, you resented fate in that moment. you resented it for sending mark to Canada, and for pulling the two of you apart. you could have had a ridiculously cute best friends-to-lovers kdrama plot, you could have enjoyed a nice, normal relationship, but fate didn’t allow for it. 

understandably, neither of you tried to contact each other for days. the cloud of sadness that seemingly followed you around wherever you went got denser and denser, until your grandmother who was here to visit knocked on your door one day. “y/n, dear? can i come in?”

“how did it go with mark?” you’d told her about the crush you’d had on mark, and how he’d called you out in the middle of the night. when you just shrugged in response, she pressed on, “did he reject you? i thought he’d called you out to confess. the boy’s always liked you, you know. we could all tell.” 

it was the last straw for you. you crumbled and cried into her shoulder, feeling like a little girl once more. the two of you sat there in silence for a few more minutes, your grandmother running her fingers through your hair. when you’d calmed down, you looked at her with tears in your puffy eyes. “he… didn’t reject me,” you whispered in horror, “i rejected him.”

the gasp of shock your grandmother sucked in beside you did nothing to elevate your sentiments. “but… why?” your tone hardened, sadness turning into unadulterated anger, “fate won’t let us be together. it’s sending him to Canada, while i stay here. it’s the first time i’ve fallen in love, and yet i still can’t experience a relationship with my first love. it’s not fair. there isn’t any way we can be together.” without realising it, tears had begun to fall again. you wiped them away furiously, refusing to cry again. “i wish there was,” you said, detached, voice barely audible. 

your grandmother looked contemplative for a moment before beginning to speak slowly, “but that’s true! you don’t know when you’re going to be able to find a love like this ever again! when you find something like this, how can you let something little like fate get in your way? take this love and run away with it!” her voice began to escalate at the end, face shining with enthusiasm. you wondered momentarily if that was what she did with your grandfather.

“so you’re saying that… i should try to reconcile with mark, and we can give it a shot at all this relationship stuff?”

“yes. now go! you have a boyfriend to get!”

the world suddenly seemed five shades brighter as you grabbed your things, ready to leave, when your phone screen lit up with a notification.

calendar: mark’s flight today at 5pm! do not miss!

“fuck. his flight is in an hour’s time,” you panicked, trying to tie your hair up with your shoelace which was inconveniently lying on a table. (you hadn’t been focusing much on room upkeep ever since you rejected mark.)

your grandmother didn’t even bother reprimanding you for your less than appropriate language, instead slamming her hand down on the bed with more strength than you thought an eighty year old woman would have. “what are you waiting for? go get your man! grandma’ll be waiting for you right here, so you better come back with good news.”

you raced through the halls of the airport, nearly knocking over five people, a stroller and a pet carrier, adrenaline pumping through your veins like it’d never before. you’d almost failed all your runs for phys ed in school, but you suddenly felt like usain bolt. you didn’t have time. mark’s flight was leaving in fifteen minutes, and you didn’t know when would be the next time he returned.

after an eternity of running, you arrived at the doors of the departure hall, where you saw a figure saying goodbye hurriedly to his family. you felt your lips tug up in a fond smile - it was just like mark to be borderline late. “mark lee! MARK LEE! LEE MINHYUNG!”

he turned around to look at you quizzically. “y/n? i- i thought you wouldn’t come. aren’t you still- aren’t you still mad? because of that night?”

you knew your hair looked like a mess, your clothes crumpled and makeup nonexistent, but mark was still looking at you like you’d hung the stars. you grinned. “what kind of a best friend would i be if i didn’t come to send you off? however…” apprehension filled mark’s expression at your last word, only causing your grin to grow as you continued, “i’d prefer to be your girlfriend.”

you didn’t think your grin would be able to grow even more, but it did as you saw mark’s face morph into shock and elation. “yes, i’m serious. i was dumb and stupid and i’m really sorry but i’d still like to give this a try-”

cliche as it sounds, he kissed you to shut you up. the media portrayed first kisses wrongly, you thought. it didn’t feel explosive or anything really shocking, but it was special. it felt right, somehow, and your soul had been yearning for this for who knows how long. so you kissed him back.

you’d lost track of how much time had passed, but mark’s brother taeyong suddenly coughed very loudly and awkwardly. “right, we’re all happy you’ve finally gotten together and all because watching you dance around each other like idiots was the worst thing i’ve ever had to do and i once had to wake up sleepy hungover yuta, but mark’s flight leaves in five minutes and i think he needs to go.”

you pulled apart hurriedly, smashing your nose against mark’s chin in the process. “bye, i love you, take care in Canada, don’t die, and talk to me!”

“call me!”

neither of you knew what the future held. but if you’re together, it’ll be alright. it’ll always be. and someday you’ll meet again.

[tae-cup]

The Analyst | Night Terrors (2)

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Summary: The prestigious department of police and investigations in Seoul, Korea, is called to the small town of Cape Springs in rural California. Nothing is quite what it seems here.

Warnings: Blood, violence, you know crime stuff? Fluffy stuff somehow

Genre: Mystery, Crime, Angst, a lil humor, sexual innuendos, BUT I S W E AR DON’T WRITE SMUT OKAY

Word Count: 8k Words (they just keep getting longer omg)

A/N: Let me know your thoughts! Any suspects? Just message me if you want to be tagged! 

Thank you so much to @kingbewwy for helping with my story planning and ideas!!

Beautiful header by the wonderful @dnrequests

Other:

Series Masterlist

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    You were leaving class, head down, trying to stay out of the way of the students in front of you. Blending into the background was something that you wanted, but you also couldn’t hide your passion for forensic analysis. The entire process fascinated you, plus it was a job that had you easily disappearing from the public eye. You were taking biochemistry, toxicology, and criminal justice to bolster your dreams. 

      It was a normal day. Normal as it could be for you, anyway. You were currently interning at the local police station on a work study permit. You would go and observe how things worked in your free time, often shadowing the forensic analyst of the team. Jae-hwa was an older man with years of experience, yet no cases to use that experience on. The man would often grumble about the slowness of the town as he showed you how to work the equipment. 

     Today, you made your way to the station, shoulders drooping under the weight of your backpack. 

“Y/N!” Your mentor called. “Come here, we want to introduce you to somebody.”

“Okay?” You dropped your bag in the office lounge and made your way to where you could hear his voice. He stood, a younger man next to him. 

“This is Namjoon, he’s interning here as well now.” 

     You smiled warmly, Namjoon did the same. He had dimples, which you couldn’t help thinking were adorable. 

“Nice to meet you, I’m Y/N, I hope we work well together.” You held out your hand and he shook it. His grip was firm, but not tight. 

“Nice to meet you as well, and same to you.” He dipped his head in acknowledgement. He seemed cool, calm, and collected. He would make a great police chief. If it weren’t for that hair.You thought to yourself. His bright blue hair might be a little too...funky?

“I’ll let you two get acquainted.” The forensic autopsy technician passed you some money. “Here, go out to lunch or something.” 

“Oh, it’s fine, I can pay.” You smiled, offering the cash back to him. You may be a broke college student, but you still refused handouts. The man sighed. 

“Just take it, Y/N.” Then he left. 

    There was an awkward silence as you and the other intern stared at each other. He swallowed, you blinked a couple times. Finally, you cleared your throat. 

“I guess we should get going, then I’ll show you around the station.” You announced, headed towards the exit. The blue haired male snapped out of his daze and raced after you. 

“So what brings you here?” You asked, turning the corner and scanning the street before quickly crossing the road. 

“You just jaywalked.” He brushed past your question. For some reason, his tone made you feel as if you’d just been convicted of murder. Your eyes darted around the block before turning to face him. 

“And you have bright blue hair. Don’t point out the obvious. Besides, I don’t see any cops. What are you going to do, arrest me?” You rolled your eyes. 

“My hair is perfectly fine- it was just a stupid dare, and anyway aren’t you supposed to be representing the station?” 

“It’s not like I’m wearing a uniform or holding a sign screaming that I intern at the police department.” You pursed your lips. Why did he make you so nervous? 

“Maybe not, but I am about to be a police chief.” He raised an eyebrow. 

Your face went pale. 

“What?” 

“Yeah, I’m assembling the best of the best to create Bangtan Police Department. We’re going to take the police world by storm.” His chest puffed slightly in pride. You only laughed, watching his expression deflate. 

“Namjoon you are hilarious. You’re so young. Just get through this internship and think over it again.” You patted his arm and continued walking down the street. He gaped, once again having to catch up to you. 

“Excuse me, I’m sure you’re actually younger than me! And it’s true, it’s going to be great!” 

“What are you going to do? Call out every person who jaywalks?” A small smile slid onto your face. He was not as amused. 

“I’m going to help with solving murder cases, cold cases, help the poor, anything.” 

“Uh huh.” You opened the door to the cafe. “Got any people in mind?” 

“I have a couple friends. Yoongi is already known as a top notch investigator and he’s training a rookie named Taehyung, but they’re on board with joining.” 

“Min Yoongi? The person who helped solve the murders of Hyun and In-sun?” You tilted your head in interest. 

      The murders of Hyun and In-sun were a famous case in Korea. The case itself was filled with weird holes and inconsistencies, along with the fact that the local police had been bribed. In the end, the case had gone cold until Min Yoongi came in and solved it within a month. It was...extraordinary. There was something different in the way that man’s mind worked. 

“Yeah!” Namjoon nodded enthusiastically. “My father trained him.” 

You narrowed your eyes, not believing his story. 

“Okay, okay, who else?” 

“Well, my second in command will be my long term partner and friend, Kim Seokjin. He’s a reasonable man with experience in the field as a police officer and investigative reporter.” 

“Interesting, continue.” 

The drinks arrived, condensation dripping off the glasses. 

“Well, that’s all I have so far. I’m planning on recruiting more once we get more well known.” 

You pinched the bridge of your nose. 

“Okay, let me get this straight, lover boy.” You ignored his flushed his face at the nickname you just appointed. “You have four people and you want to start the world’s best investigative slash police team.” 

“Yes.” He said, his voice softer and you could tell he was losing his energy. “But I still need an analyst.” He gave you a pointed look. 

        With a sigh, you studied the man. He had potential, he just needed to cultivate it. With a little growing and pushing, he’d make a great police chief. You sipped your water, mulling over the idea. It was definitely enticing, to offer yourself to him once you were done with your studies, but he was looking for the best of the best. 

“You should ask Mr. Jae-hwa.” You decided. 

“Who?”

“My mentor. Surely he introduced himself.” 

“Well yeah, I remember him I-” He sheepishly ran his fingers through his hair. “Okay, he’s your mentor, right? So why don’t you just...join?” 

“I’m inexperienced.” You frowned. “I’ve only been an intern for a year and studying for two.” 

“Once you graduate.” He amended. “I think we’d work well together.” 

      You chuckled, thinking over the opportunity. It was a risk. Every police department was looking for a good forensic analyst, you could find a good job at an established department if you wanted. Still, the offer he was giving you was enticing. Being partners with him didn’t even seem so bad. Namjoon had a hunger inside him. A hunger to prove himself and you could see him going the distance. You picked up your menu, a little smile gracing your lips. You shook your head with amusement.

“You’re too hungry, Namjoon.” 

           You had been busy. You were already working on several cases and had traveled out to Daegu to personally investigate a case. It was about a head found in a car, the body found a few days later in a house. There was lots of blood. You placed the cotton swab into a tube and sealed it up to test later. Then you maneuvered around the crime scene, trying to avoid all the police doing their jobs. You had a habit of trying to shrink, to stay out of everyone’s way as much as possible. 

      That’s when Namjoon called you. You frowned. Isn’t he in America? You glanced at the time. 4:15 P.M. You sighed, picking it up. Typical, for him to call in the middle of the night. 

“Namjoon, why the fuck are you calling me? You know I’m busy, as I said, you could just send your samples to the forensic analyst back at Bangtan….are you doubting my team’s capabilities?” You scoffed at his urgent tone. “There’s no reason for an ‘on site’ analyst.” 

       You put him onto speaker phone and stepped into your car. 

“Yeah, we also have murders over here, what makes you so special?” 

“And here I remembered you being so nice.” His muffled voice came through the speaker.

“Excuse me! I am nice! I just don’t enjoy being pulled away, I have an important job to do here too.” You complained to him, indicating and turning left. 

“Please!” A new voice came through the phone, audio cracking and popping from bad connection. 

“Taehyung, is that you?” Your eyebrows furrowed. “The connection is so poor here.” You glanced at your samples. 

      You could send these to your team and join Namjoon and the others. It had been a little under a week since you last saw them and your skin was just itching to be near them again. Perhaps it was a silly little crush, or crushes if you factored in the fact that there were seven of them. You didn’t think it possible, but here you were, pining after seven of your coworkers. 

“Fine!” You cried over their voices shouting into the phone. You parked in front of your hotel. You were already clearing your schedule and arranging for the samples to be sent to your team of analysts. “I’ll be there in two days, just please grab some blood swabs for me.” You huffed, hanging up. 

         You pressed your forehead to the wheel of the car, a sigh escaping your lips as you pressed your eyes shut. These boys were already giving you a headache and you weren’t even with them yet. 

           Two days later, a Tuesday, you set your bags down in the empty lobby of the Cape Springs police station. You arrived like the plague doctor, briefcase and everything, the fading sun behind you. The dust made you want to sneeze, your nose scrunching up as you fought the urge. You decided to go straight to the police station, y’know, for funsies; and also to surprise them. The hard suitcase that held your equipment was in hand as you sneakily made your way through the building. 

        You could hear the murmur of their voices and you turned right down a short hallway. There was an open door that led to a conference room with a large round table. Eight chairs were pulled up, one empty, a ninth chair in the corner occupied by a small looking girl. She was eagerly taking notes of the conversation. 

“Once Y/N arrives, we can finally look over the samples. My best guess is Rohypnol but you never know, it could be something less traceable, like oxygen injected into the bloodstream.” Namjoon declared. 

“But we’ve never found any discarded needles, that seems nonsensical.” Jimin pointed out. 

“Rohypnol is a good guess, based on the reports you sent in.” You leaned against the door frame, arms crossed. A sly smile graced your lips. 

     Startled, eight heads turned to face you. Seven smiles broke out. 

“Y/N! You’re finally here!” Taehyung jumped up, Jungkook following suit. You opened your arms, used to their tag team hugs. 

        You peer over the taller men’s shoulders, just barely, to catch Namjoon smiling with, perhaps, relief. Jin was observing the sight, amusement evident in his posture, Hoseok was quick to wait behind Jimin who was also awaiting your hug. Then there was Yoongi who didn’t seem bothered at all, yielding no reaction. 

        You weren’t exactly disappointed, this was his usual behavior, but it was surprising. Time to fix that attitude. You had always been a motherly figure, despite your lack of interest in having children. The two younger ones pulled away and before Jimin and Hoseok could launch forward, you put up a hand to stop them. 

“Yoongi.” You barked harshly, placing your hands on your hips. He groaned loudly, like a reluctant teenager. “Is that any way to greet your mother?” You frowned in mock disapproval. “Come give me a hug.” You opened your arms up to him and made a grabbing motion with your fingers. 

“You’re not my mother, I’m way older than you.” He grumbled, standing and giving you a quick hug. You flushed proudly. Everyone, you included, knew Yoongi would follow your orders, begrudgingly, yes, but he would still follow them no matter what. He held a deep respect for you, despite being four years older. You never knew where it came from, but it was there. 

       After the awkward hug, Jimin and Hoseok embraced you. They giggled and easily snitched on the misbehavior of their friends, receiving annoyed shouts from the other boys. 

“Taehyung!” You cried, horrified. “Is it true you’ve only been eating french toast for all your meals?!” 

“That’s not completely true. I ate regular toast once when they were out of ingredients for french toast.” Taehyung said grimly, his face without a trace of humor. You just huffed and turned to the remaining people. 

       The girl was visibly startled by all the commotion and she stood next to Jin and Namjoon. A little too close. Your eyes narrowed, but you shook your head. You needed to focus on the task at hand. 

      There was still a twinge of jealousy. You were the only female in the inner circle, the best of the best. The eight wonders of the crime world. Each specializing in a different area, constantly called upon for the biggest of mysteries. Every single one, without fail, ended with a stamp on the file; Case solved. 

“And who is this?” You tried to hide the slightest twinge of jealousy in your gut. She seemed to be a perfectly nice girl, a bit fragile looking, but someone with the face of an angel. She looks like she wouldn’t hurt a fly. 

“This is Hae-won.” Jungkook grinned. “She’s my age and she’s here to study the process!” He explained excitedly. 

“That’s great, Jungkook. Lovely to meet you, Hae-won.” You passed off her slight narrowing of eyes to a trick of the light. After all, the sun was coming in low at this hour and it could have been shining in her eyes. You held up the hard suitcase that had your heavy equipment. “Where can I set up my equipment?” 

“O-over here.” Hae-won stuttered, rushing ahead to show you the old forensic room. “We haven’t had the need for it in a while, I’m sorry it’s so dusty.” She apologized, dipping her head in embarrassment. 

“It’s perfect, thank you.” You bowed to her and she left the room to leave you to set up. 

       You took out your plastic test tubes, ziplocs, microscope, and petri dishes. Then you checked to make sure your camera wasn’t scratched before throwing open the blinds. The window was facing the opposite direction from the sun so all you could see was a long shadow hitting the building next door. 

“Joonie?” You barked from your room. You made a note to pick up wipes to clean up the place. 

“Yes?” His footsteps pounded down the hallway and then skidded to a halt outside the door. 

“Did you get the blood samples like I asked?” You asked, a cheery tone to your voice. 

“Yes, but can’t you wait? I know you’re a workaholic, but we’re heading out to the diner for some dinner.” 

“No wonder you guys haven’t been able to solve anything.” You rolled your eyes. 

“First of all!” Namjoon sputtered, “Betty’s diner has excellent food and second of all, we need to eat, unlike you. You’re like a vampire, you only need blood to survive.” 

“I enjoy my work.” You said dryly, giving him a hard look, fingertips pressed together. 

“Yeah, yeah, just a little too much.” 

“If this is your way of asking me to live a little, I will have you know that my work is very fulfilling.” Especially when I get to work 24/7 with you guys. 

Namjoon sighed and crossed his arms. “You will only get the samples once we go out for food. You will eat at all mealtimes and that’s an order.” 

“Fine.” You grumbled, turning around to take out the last lense. “Who else is going to supervise that Tae gets a balanced diet?” 

“That’s the spirit.” 

        He turned to leave, but he lingered in the doorway. His hand rested on the wooden door frame, tethering him to the room. You admired the way his smooth brown hair looked as it became dusk. 

       It had taken forever, but you had convinced him to stop dying it blue in college. It’s damaging the hell out of your roots and how is anyone going to take you seriously with vibrant blue hair? That’s what you had said. He had relented after some push back and now you were blessed to see his beautiful hazel brown hair. 

“By the way, we missed you.” Namjoon murmured softly, you almost didn’t catch it. It was a surprise, but the fearless police chief had a soft voice, one that could easily be missed if you weren’t listening. 

“I was gone for under a week before you needed my help.” 

       His lips quirked into a smile, hand slipping from the door frame as he retreated back to the meeting room. 

        You decided Hae-won didn’t talk much. You tried to engage her in conversation, but she had responded half-heartedly several times and you gave up trying to push it. A part of you had hoped you would become friends, maybe talk about something other than the murders. Because contrary to popular belief, you weren’t a complete workaholic. Which, now that you thought about it, Namjoon was being a huge ass hypocrite. 

        Whenever you were on a job with the other seven men, all they could talk about was the case and if they were going to drag you out to dinner, you didn’t want to be regaled with tales of disembodied heads and people being cut open. It just wasn’t polite. 

“Hae-won, what did you order?” You asked, trying to include the girl who seemed to shrink with every passing minute. 

      She avoided your gaze, mumbling something to the table, or it may have been to you. You couldn’t tell because she refused to look anywhere except the ground. 

“She said she ordered a burger.” Jungkook nodded at you. You raised an eyebrow. 

“She can tell me that herself, yeah?” You didn’t mean it so harshly, it just came out that way. 

“Hae-won is just a little shy!” Taehyung interjected, rushing to the girl’s defense. You just narrowed your eyes further. 

“And what did you say she was studying to be?” You weren’t an interrogator or investigator by any means, but you had seen Yoongi and Taehyung at work before. 

“An interrogation officer.” Yoongi drawled, taking a sip of his water and looking like he wished it were alcohol instead. 

“Interesting.” You murmured. Maybe she was just nervous about meeting new people, but she would have to get over that quickly if she wanted to last. 

“Oh yeah, I found something at the crime scene yesterday. I wanted to check again.” Jimin said, bringing the conversation back. 

“And?” Namjoon looked expectantly at him. 

“Well it was after we went to retrieve the samples for Y/N and…” He shook his head. “I think it’s better to discuss it in detail in the meeting tomorrow.” He sighed. “I just wanted to give you a heads up.” 

“Too bad we didn’t bring in a forensic autopsy technician.” Taehyung sighed, head resting on Jimin’s shoulder. 

      It made the man tense, but Taehyung had never been good at reading the room. Namjoon kicked the poor boy under the table, making him jolt upright with an awkward chuckle. Small town, things are different here. It was like the token red dot in a sea of blue. 

“I interned under a forensic autopsy technician. I don’t know much, but I understand the process.” You cracked your knuckles, already trying to recall the steps you’d seen Jae-hwa, your mentor, go through. Namjoon nodded along with your statement, having worked alongside you. 

“Of course our very own specialist isn’t just experienced in one area.” Jungkook puffed his chest out and you tried to hide the flutter in your heart and the heat crawling up your neck. 

“Can I visit the crime scene tomorrow?” You asked, though you would even if they told you no. 

“Yes, of course. Do it before the meeting so you can discuss your findings.” Jin nodded. 

“When is the meeting?” You were exhausted, jetlag wearing you down. 

“2:00 P.M. tomorrow.” 

“Okay.” You made a mental note of it. “I’ll be there. Would anyone like to join me?” 

“Uh, yeah.” Jimin quickly raised his hand. “I’d like to check it out more.” 

“I’ll go too.” Hoseok said, having not spoken much, which was odd for the hyper police officer. 

          He had spent the time whispering things to Hae-won. It looked like they were in their own little fantasy, their own fan club. For some reason, your blood began to boil at the thought. Calm down. It’s nothing. There’s nothing going on here. You’ve known these boys forever. If anyone is going to be with them, it’ll be you. The last sentence in your mental monologue made you internally slap yourself. How can you think like that? Just shut up and do your job. 

         Right, maybe your job could distract you from whatever feelings you had towards your incredibly handsome coworkers. Besides, they had a job to do too. The last thing on their minds should be their love life, so the same should apply to you. 

“I have french toast?” The waiter asked. You turned your head to face Taehyung so fast you almost got whiplash. 

“You bastard, you said you were getting the hamburger.” 

He just grinned evilly and leaned over the table to take his plate. 

          You had seen plenty of dead bodies before, but usually it was easier when they were cleaned up. God, it was like no one understood how autopsies worked in this place. You couldn’t just deal with this bloodied corpse, you need to be able to see and analyse the wound. 

         Having Namjoon there helped you with your frustration as you swiped at the blood staining the victim’s, Hak-kun, neck. You ignored the goosebumps that broke out when your finger brushed over his very cold and very dead skin. Namjoon looked more disturbed while you held a calm facade. 

        Right, he’d seen Hak-kun alive and breathing just days prior. The man had seen him warm and full of blood pumping through his heart. The contrast must be disconcerting. 

“Namjoon, you really don’t have to be here.” You said softly. You may be a dumb ass sometimes when it came to emotions, but you weren’t heartless. Besides, you could feel the waves of anxiety rolling off him. 

Ever the brave chief, he shook his head and took a step closer. 

“It’s fine, really.” He swallowed thickly in a way that screamed definitely not fine. “I want to help.” 

He could be a real help, you knew that, but your guilt won out. “No it’s okay, I insist. Actually, it would be better if you left while I examined the body.” 

“I don’t believe you.” There wasn’t a hint of amusement in his voice. 

“Okay, fine, but just stand where you won’t be in the way and take note of everything I say.” You quickly amend. Once Namjoon pulls the ‘I don’t believe you’ card, there’s no escaping his words. 

“Alright.” He seemed content with that. 

       You picked up your scissors to get ready to cut away at the dirtied fabric. You took another moment to look at him. He was standing dutifully, a pen and notepad in hand. He waited expectantly. 

“If this becomes too much for you to watch, I won’t fault you for leaving.” Your eyes clouded over in sympathy. He scoffed. 

“You underestimate your chief.” 

“If you say so.” You then set to cutting away the strips of cloth that covered the abdomen. You took a moment to search for bruising. You found none. “No bruising visible on abdomen, though I speculate there are some on the back, according to Jimin’s description.” Your voice was monotone, calm, without a single waver. 

“The neck has been cut deep. I can guess that the killer is experienced. It’s a clean cut, straight down and cutting through the sternocleidomastoid.” You leaned down, surveying for any other nicks. 

“I see no other points of contact, the neck being the only surface bloodied. No extra cuts, it’s not messy.” You rolled the body over and cut away the back. Your eyebrows furrowed together. Your lack of speaking caused Namjoon to look up. 

     He eyed the bruises warily as you moved more cloth aside. 

“There is severe bruising along the vertebrae.” You dictated, eyeing the dark spots along the spine. “Most likely caused by dragging. There are other bruises, they look roughly the size of fingerprints.” 

      You took out the tape set on the tray beside you and pressed a strip to one of the dark spots. “I’ll analyse this, see if there’s any fingerprints. From where they’re located and from the bruising, I can guess that the killer is smaller in stature. Most likely having to drag the victim to his final resting place, unable to support his weight.” You thought for a moment. “That’s enough for now.” 

       You cut some fabric and placed them in ziploc bags. Then you wheeled the body back into a cold storage unit. You cleaned up your workstation and then left Namjoon trailing behind you. 

“How did you figure all that out?” He asked after a moment. 

“Those are just my guesses, they aren’t the law.” You smiled gently. “I’m trained to give my best guesses.” You walked ahead. “Now, let’s go visit that crime scene.” 

           The ground was free of blood. You had even gotten on your stomach to check and found nothing. This could only mean that Hak-kun was murdered in his car. That also made little sense and his positioning was confusing as well. He had been resting against the dashboard, looking peacefully asleep. It was also odd how he even managed to get into his car. A small town like this didn’t have security cameras up and around so that could give no answers. 

          The only traces of blood were in the car. Drugs must have played a part in this, why else didn’t he fight back? Your stomach turned. This was definitely an odd case. The murders were cold, calculated, well thought out and tracks well covered. It was exceptionally easy to get away with these in such a small town. 

         You arrived back at the police station to see if your samples were done. They were, and the results were not surprising. Rohypnol. Most commonly known as the date rape drug, it acted fast to immobilize an unsuspecting person. You printed out the results, because thank god they had wifi here at least, and left for the meeting. 

The meeting room wasn’t big and with nine of you in it, the walls were suffocatingly close. 

“Okay, let’s begin.” Namjoon said as everyone settled into their seats. Hae-won took the seat in the corner. “Jimin, start.” 

        The detective nodded to his superior and turned to grab his briefcase off the floor. He placed it on the table with a thump. Everyone in the room waited with bated breath. The pink haired man pulled on blue plastic gloves and took out a plastic bag. Inside of it was a beret. It was black with a little gold button in the center. It could be considered cute if it wasn’t found at a murder sight. 

“I was looking around and I accidentally bumped open the glove compartment. I found this.” He explained, pulling it out with a gloved hand and turning it to show everyone. Hae-won let out a small gasp.

“That’s mine!” She squeaked. “It went missing a few days ago.” 

          You exchanged a worried look with your coworkers. Carefully, you placed your files on the table and stood. You crouched in front of her, the men watching you. You placed your hands on hers; she was trembling. 

“Hae-won, love.” You smiled softly. “You realize this incriminates you, yes?” 

         She shook her head violently and pulled her hands away from you. In her eyes, you didn’t see any sign of a killer. You only saw a scared girl, a shaking, terrified out of her mind, girl. 

“I-I didn’t-didn’t-” She stuttered, breathless. 

        Jungkook quickly jumped up, rushing over to comfort the girl. You were pushed aside and you tried your best to keep a frown off your face. You settled for an impassive look. 

“Y/N! How could you suggest such a thing, can’t you see Hae-won wouldn’t even hurt a fly. She’s scared of walking home alone at night, you think she’s going to murder five people?” Jungkook seethed. You ignored the rage boiling in your stomach. 

“It’s proper procedure, she needs to know.” You tutted. 

“And you’re being heartless.” Jungkook hissed. You were taken aback, lips pressing into a thin line. 

“I’m doing my job, Jeon.” You said coldly. “Listen, I read the case file, I know you found Hak-kun’s tie and then he was murdered, so there’s a possibility that these talismans are a sign of who is next.” You pointed to the beret as you spoke, trying to shrug off your pain. 

“In that case, we need Hae-won under constant surveillance when Saturday rolls around.” Jin said. Instantly they all looked to Hoseok. 

“What? Why me?” The man furrowed his eyebrows. 

“Have you forgotten? You’re one of the only formally trained and active police officers we have. Jin is too old.” Yoongi smirked. 

“Excuse me!” Jin gaped, mouth opening and closing to find a response. 

“And if she is the murderer, then we can watch her carefully.” Namjoon turned to you, seeing if this placated you. It wasn’t like you needed to be satisfied by any agreement. You were just doing your damn job, why couldn’t they? 

“I have no problem with that.” You sat down in your chair. “Anyway,” You opened your file as the room went back to order. “I found, very obviously, traces of Rohypnol. The victim was definitely drugged, the question is how.” 

“All the evidence we have is the glass of spilt water we found. I can only guess he took it voluntarily.” Jin pointed out. 

“Well, didn’t he mention having a headache in that tape? He could have easily been convinced.” Jimin leaned back, crossing his arms. There was a tense silence as everyone worked to put pieces together. 

“There has to be a motive, there hasn’t to be a reason these people are connected.” You drummed your fingers on the table restlessly.

          You didn’t want to be suspicious of Jin, but you were. If he wasn’t the murderer, was it possible he was involved with them? He was the last one in the surveillance room. You didn’t want to accuse him and you were busy denying it to yourself, but it was a possibility. Surely, Yoongi and Taehyung had thought of it as well and brushed it off. 

“Hyung, don’t you think that it’s odd that the footage was looping.” Jungkook turned to Jin. “Isn’t security footage one of your specialties? You stayed late, you didn’t notice that he was looping?” 

The second in command narrowed his eyes at the young male. “Are you suggesting I have something to do with this?” 

        There was an intense stare off as they glared at each other. Namjoon reached up to put a hand on his partner’s shoulder and Taehyung frowned at Jungkook. These seven men were the only ones you could trust in a case, what happens when that comes into question? The distrust would run rampant. Namjoon must have been on the same thought line as you because he broke the stare off by clearing his throat. 

“Absolutely not, it would make no sense and Seokjin has been nothing but loyal all these years. He has no motive and he’s a trustworthy man.” 

“I just think it’s something to ponder over.” The glorified coffee boy said. 

“No. We don’t throw accusations around like that, Jeon.” Yoongi turned to scold the maknae. The boy simply shrugged, swiping his bangs off his face. 

“It’s odd, that’s all.” He shrugged nonchalantly, ignoring the redness of Seokjin’s face. 

        Your eyes surveyed the room, noting the tense posture of Jin, the frown still plastered on Taehyung’s lips, the laid back nature of Yoongi, Hoseok’s arm around Jimin, and you decided to break it up. 

“Okay, that’s enough. Apologize, Jeon.” You said sternly. The young man, who had been so confident a second before, now looked like a kicked puppy. 

“I’m doing my job.”

“You don’t have a job here.” Namjoon drawled. 

Jungkook’s face lit up red, embarrassment taking over. 

“Yah! We let you sit here and then you go and accuse our second!” Taehyung shouted, jumping up. Jungkook scrambled back as the tall man stalked over to him. 

“Kim Taehyung, sit the fuck back down.” You hissed. “And you too, Jungkook.” 

They both halted immediately and sat back down. Taehyung swallowed. 

“You guys are acting like children.” You huffed. “Now, let me continue.” You took out some papers and shuffled them. “First, it was a clean job. The stroke was purposeful along the jugular. There were no other signs of struggle except the bruises on his back, which could be attributed to being dragged along the pavement. I found no other DNA except Hak-kun’s.” You read. 

“The killer was very clean indeed.” Namjoon responded, everyone remained silent. The tensions falling over the room like a thick blanket. 

“Okay, I can’t think in this tension. You guys work your shit out, I’m going to look over the tapes again.” Yoongi stood and promptly left. 

        Your eyes trailed his figure as he stormed down the hall. The door to the room currently dubbed the ‘investigator’s nest’ slammed shut. Taehyung sighed and some of the tension left the room when he stood as well. 

“I better go check up on him and work through some files.” He announced, not waiting for Namjoon to dismiss him before he left. You could hear him padding softly down the hall and knocking on the door. 

         The others gradually stood, making up some excuse or another before it was just you, sitting dumbfounded along with Namjoon, and Hae-won. There was a long, drawn out, silence that stretched between you three. You were an unlikely trio with no Jungkook to bridge the gap. You just stood and left, no further words needed. Besides, you wanted to test for fingerprints on the fabric. 

          Down the hallway, to the left, the Investigator’s Nest was closed to prying eyes. Taehyung sat on the floor, surrounded by old case files and manila folders. Yoongi sat at the desk, earbuds in as he listened to the tapes once more. 

“You know, hyung, no matter how many times you listen to those tapes, nothing new is going to come up. Hak-kun obviously isn’t guilty.” Taehyung said, picking up a paper and reading it. The head investigator didn’t look up from the screen, but he did take an earbud out. 

“I don’t think he’s guilty, I’m just wondering if he knew who it was. Maybe that’s why he so willingly took the drugs, maybe he recognized them.” 

“You and I have both listened to those tapes so many times I could recite every line from memory.” Taehyung grumbled. He stretched out his legs, avoiding the neat stacks he had littered around. 

“I know, I know.” Yoongi sighed and lightly slapped his face to stay awake. His eyes hurt. 

“And we both know that he doesn’t mention anyone other than Mun-hee.” 

“Maybe he was working with the killer?”

“Why would he be dead now then?” 

“I. Don’t. Know.” Yoongi said through gritted teeth. 

“Hyung…” The younger male stood and walked over standing behind him. His slender fingers started kneading Yoongi’s shoulders. 

        Taehyung had been feeling lonely, just a little. Though Yoongi and him slept together, the older man rarely showed his affections. It was the opposite to Taehyung’s openly affectionate personality. Now that they were in a small town, the prejudice was palpable everytime they hugged so Yoongi had basically cut him off from that as well. 

“What’s wrong, Tae?” Of course he knew something was up with his young lover. 

          Yoongi had learned over the years how Taehyung ticked, how he functioned. He knew he had been somewhat neglectful, but he was more concerned about being beat up if the town found out about them. 

“You know you haven’t kissed me since we arrived at the airport?” Taehyung murmured in Yoongi’s ear. It would be seductive if Taehyung didn’t genuinely want a kiss. Instead, it came across more whiny. 

         The investigator sighed and turned around in his chair to look over the taller man. He placed his hands on his hips. 

“Is that really all you want?” He fought to keep the flush off his face. 

         Taehyung nodded wordlessly, leaning down, but Yoongi spotted an odd file on the ground. He moved his head, causing Taehyung to shout in anguish as he just missed his lips. 

“In a moment, Tae.” Yoongi stood abruptly, causing Taehyung to stumble back a few steps. 

         The other man looked hurt, opening his mouth to say something when he saw Yoongi bend down to pick up a file. The head investigator opened the file, flipping through it until he suddenly stopped. 

“What is it, Yoongs?” Taehyung peered over the man’s shoulder, but he turned the other way. With a huff, he stood back, studying Yoongi’s face. 

“I found something interesting.” His eyes were focused on one spot, one picture. 

           A girl, her throat slit, blood pooling on the dashboard. She looked like she fell asleep at the wheel. Her hair splayed around her head, soaked in her own red liquid. His eyes trailed up the page. It was dated two years before. The picture was labeled ‘People V.S. Paek Cho, exhibit A’. He flipped to the next page. There was a newspaper article cut out. He examined it, frowning. 

“Farmer Chung-hee’s daughter, Joo-Eun, found dead in her car, Rohypnol in her system. Officers claim there was no sign of sexual trauma, however. Paek Cho, an accomplished student and outstanding citizen is convicted of her murder…” Yoongi murmured, reading over the article. 

“....Father had to be dragged out of the room by officers once the sentence was read out. An anonymous friend of Joo-Eun testifies against Paek Cho, stating ‘he always gave them the creeps’. Paek Cho receives one year of community service after being convicted of collusion in the murder, but in the end there was not enough evidence to convict the young man of first degree murder or even manslaughter.” He stopped, reading the last sentence in his mind. It’s odd, considering the amount of indisputable evidence stacked against Mr. Paek. His mind was racing with possibilities. 

          These murders and the murder of Joo-Eun held a shocking resemblance. It could be a way to get back at the town, but the only person mentioned who would have such a motive would be Chung-hee, the farmer, and no one in town had even mentioned him. He threw the file onto the desk. 

“Taehyung, tell me what you see.” 

     The dark haired man picked up the file and flipped through it. “Oh.” was all he said. 

       His eyes were surveying the same picture, the article, everything. 

“Why is the file so empty?” He murmured. He then skipped to the last few pages. “Wait.” He took out the article and placed it carefully down. The paper was old and worn. 

“What is it?” Yoongi leaned over, placing his hands on the desk. 

“It says here that Mun-hee was a juror at the trial, so was our Jane Doe.” Taehyung pointed to their names. 

          Yoongi’s eyes snapped up to meet Taehyung’s. 

“Taehyung, we need those court documents, now.” 

           Slam. A thick binder of papers was dropped onto the desks. Jin looked up from his studies, Namjoon leaning over him as they spoke in hushed voices. Jimin was joking about something with Hoseok and Hae-won, who was now under 24/7 surveillance. You stood to the side, talking to Jungkook about your results and also trying to give him some pointers on holding his tongue. 

           Everyone’s eyes trailed to Taehyung and Yoongi’s panting forms in the doorway then to the binder on the desk. Dust flew from underneath, making Taehyung cough, the sound turning to a wheeze because of how out of breath he was. 

“Did you guys just run a marathon or something?” You raised an eyebrow. 

“Shut up, Y/N. You know I would never put myself through such torture.” Yoongi scoffed. 

“We went to town hall to retrieve some court documents.” Taehyung explained quickly. He then went on to explain their previous discussion in detail, Yoongi chiming in every so often. 

“Hae-won, are you alright?” Namjoon interrupted, looking at the trembling girl. She looked like she was panicking, sweat beading on her forehead. 

“It’s just not right! They let Cho off so easily, it’s not justice, it’s against everything the law stands for.” She cried out, literally shaking with rage as she spoke. You, along with everyone else, were surprised by her outburst. Hae-won was a curious creature, hm? 

“Were you a part of the case?” You prodded, subtly asking why she was so worked up. There would be no other reason for these emotions.

          She had such bitterness apparent in her eyes. You watched her carefully, eyes drinking in her movements. You took note of the slightest twitch in her fingers, the crescent prints she left in the palms of her hands, the way her lips tugged downwards. 

“N-no.” She said, her voice reverted to the quiet girl you all knew her as. She sat back down, taking in a shaky breath. “I just love this town, this is a sore spot for a lot of the good people in town.” She said sweetly. 

“But you knew the jury members?” Jin asked. 

“Yes, I...I went to school with them. We were seniors, a lot of us were 18 and the town is small, they don’t have a big pool of choices for jury members.” She explained. 

“Right.” Yoongi nodded, seemingly understanding. He then turned his attention to the file in front of him and you did the same. “It looks like, just as we suspected, Hak-kun, Mun-hee, Jane Doe, and the two previous murders were jury members.” 

“Poor Chung-hee was never the same after that trial.” Hae-won suddenly said, her voice ladened with pain. “He lives alone now, outside of town; doesn’t speak to anyone, refuses to even look the folks here in the eye.” 

      Once again, your attention drifted back to Hae-won. 

“Did you know her, Joo-Eun?” You asked the girl. 

“Yeah, but only a little. We went to the same high school, but she was always nice!” Hae-won said. “I just remember once she came out to meet me when I was about to head home. It was winter and the sun set early, you know? So anyway, it was getting dark and I remember how she grabbed my arm, her face pale. She said to me ‘I think someone is following me, please walk home with me.’ I didn’t think much of it. We don’t have any creepers, you know? But Paek Cho was always off.” She shrugged. Then suddenly she looked stricken, like she didn’t mean to say that much. The dark haired girl covered her face with her hands. 

“Can you tell us anything else?” You asked softly. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t-I don’t remember. I think she asked me to walk her home from a party once but I refused.” She sighed. “Then she was dead the next day. I was too busy studying for my finals.” 

           She may have been a harmless bystander, but it was obvious this weighed on her. “I often think about how I was the last person she contacted. I barely knew her and suddenly I was roped in.” She looked close to tears so you went over and hugged her. 

            The others remained silent, watching the interaction. Namjoon felt his heart flutter when you made eye contact with him. He couldn’t help imagining your arms wrapped around him. 

“You said Chung-hee remained outside of town?” Namjoon questioned, not daring to take a step. He was worried he would throw off the delicate balance of tension in the room. 

“Yes, but he’s not the murderer! He wouldn’t hurt anyone, he’s just a little grumpy, a real loner.” Hae-won cried. 

“How are you connected with him, Hae-won?” Yoongi asked, his voice gentle, but prying.

“I’ve just-I used to buy my produce fresh from him.” She answered easily. “He was always kind.” 

         Yoongi nodded at her response. 

“Jungkook, please take Hae-won out for some fresh air. It’s stuffy and dusty in here, it can’t be helping the situation.” Jin said factually. Jungkook nodded, despite their earlier differences, he still listened to his superior. 

         Once they were gone, you all stared at each other. 

“Okay, I’ll say it then.” Taehyung broke the silence. “Chung-hee is the most obvious suspect here. He fits all the descriptions, he has a motive, he doesn’t speak to anyone in town.” 

“But Hae-won said-” Hoseok began. 

“I don’t give a rats ass about what Hae-won said.” Yoongi interrupted. “We need to investigate him.” 

“It just doesn’t feel right. Something about it isn’t right, but it wouldn’t hurt to check it out, I suppose.” Hoseok relented. You noted that he spent a lot of time giving in to the others. It could be that he had an inferiority complex, being seen as your run of the mill police officer. 

“Hoseok, you have opinions too, we’re okay with hearing them out, right Yoongi?” Jimin seemed to follow your thoughts. 

“Uh, uh, right.” Hoseok murmured, suddenly bashful now that the spotlight was on him. 

            He realized that he so rarely was asked what he thought. The man spent a lot of time just following their orders; he trusted them wholly and completely. His faith had never wavered in his partners, his coworkers, his lovers. It felt unreasonable, rude, and downgrading if he tried to bring up his lowly opinions; as if he was tainting their genius by bringing his own stupidity into it. After all, he never finished college. He went straight to the police academy, deciding school just wasn’t for him. 

“I just, Chung-hee doesn’t seem like the kind of guy to-to do such a petty thing.” He tried to explain his gut feeling. 

“We don’t know what kind of person he is, yet, Hobi.” Jin narrowed his eyes, almost accusing him of colluding with the murderer. 

       Once again, Hoseok was reminded of his inferiority. Of course, of course. But then an angel sang and came to his defense. 

“I have to agree with Hobi.” You said firmly. “My mind is saying ‘it’s obviously him’, but my gut is telling me no.” 

          Hoseok was...shocked. No one really defended him in these sorts of discussions. It felt out of character for you to do such a thing, often found laughing alongside the others. 

“As much as I respect your gut, Y/N.” Taehyung began, a condescending tone dripping from his words, “This is our job. We can’t just not investigate people who are obviously linked to a crime.” 

“But in what way? Because this poor man’s daughter was murdered two years ago? You think that’s enough to implicate him in a crime today?” 

“No! But you’re missing the point!” Taehyung hissed, running a hand through his hair. “It wouldn’t be a big deal if the crime wasn’t exactly the same.” 

         You sighed, giving up your fight as your gut twisted. Poor Chung-hee, a farmer who probably just wanted to live his life and get far away from the law, was about to be dragged into another mess. 

“Hoseok, go get Kookie and Hae-won. We leave tomorrow.” Namjoon’s eyes were cold, not a hint of emotion betrayed in his stance. “Dismissed.” 

      You turned away, taking Hoseok’s arm in yours. 

“I hope you’re doing the right thing, Namjoon.” Venom fell from your lips. You turned away and followed Hoseok out the door.

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Taglist: @lovelyseomin​

[lombredanslaeu]

pure devotion / part two

▸ werewolf! johnny x human reader

▸ read chapter one here

▸ hey! its finally here. it wasnt my plan to do a part two but y’all wanted to see what happens next so here you go. thank you so much for reading the first chapter! enjoy

recap: werewolves are assigned with a soulmate and once they reach the age of 23, they would find who their soulmate is. you have always been in denial about being in love with your best friend, johnny. as the clock struck 10:34 pm - the exact time johnny was born - that’s when you felt the universe unfold within your veins. you are johnny’s soulmate. it would have been a successful fairy tale but johnny loves you too much to let it happen.

It has been almost a week since you and Johnny last talked. You thanked the universe for not letting you cross paths with Johnny in school. It would be dishonest to say that your heart isn’t breaking each second you’re away from him. You miss him, so much. It’s only been 5 days since his birthday but you just want to run to his house and see him again. Your friends grew suspicious about what happened between you two. It’s always been Y/N and Johnny every hour of every week. Now, it’s just you.

“Okay, Y/N, cut the bullshit,” Your friend, Nayeon, along with Yeri and Jungwoo, sat in front of you, demanding for answers. “What’s going on between you and Johnny?”

You rolled your eyes. You appreciate their concern so much but you knew they were gonna demand every details about your misunderstanding. Nayeon, Yeri, and Jungwoo are vampires. Vampires aren’t assigned a soulmate. They are free to choose who they’ll spend the rest of their lives with. Although they are also close friends with Johnny and your other friends who are werewolves, you are skeptical if they would understand or not.

“We just had an argument during his birthday. No big deal.” You replied.

“Uh? Of course, it’s a big deal.” Yeri started. “First, you and Johnny? Not talking for almost a week? Second, you two arguing during his birthday?”

“It’s hard to explain, guys.” You sighed.

“We have all day, Y/N. You know you can always talk to us.” Jungwoo said. “Besides, I’ve never seen Johnny this down before.”

You decided to share what happened that night. You knew in yourself that this will spread like wildfire to your circle of friends, or even worse, throughout the whole school. It has always been a big deal whenever a werewolf is soulmates with a human. They will be nosy and concerned. You don’t mind attention but you certainly don’t want to be pitied at. Your heart also ached at the mention of Johnny being sad. All your life, you felt like it was your duty to make sure Johnny is happy and healthy. Now, you sure will beat yourself later at the thought of you not being brave enough to confront him.

---

It was only 2:00 pm but you felt so tired. You felt like Atlas took a break from carrying the world and used you as a substitute. Jungwoo suggested to talk to Johnny as soon as possible. You understand that. You know that the only solution to whatever it is that you’re feeling right now is to talk to him. See what both of you can compromise. But, your mind is still a haze. It was your future you’re talking about. Whether you make this decision or that, it will affect the rest of your life. You wished things didn’t have to be this way. For the first time in your life, you wished Johnny didn’t exist.

You went home immediately after your last class. Your mother was shocked to see you come home early. You always went places with Johnny and your friends. Yeri invited you to go vinyl shopping with her and Jaehyun but you just weren’t in the mood to be fake happy.

“You look so down, sweetheart.” Your mother said as she sat across you on the kitchen island.

“Mom, I have to tell you something.” You sighed. You hated making your mother worried. But you knew that sharing this with her will help you somehow, hopefully.

Your mother stared intently at you, waiting for you to say whatever you had to say.

“I’m soulmates with Johnny.” You started. She leaned back on her seat, taken aback from your confession. “Remember last Saturday? During his birthday? We just found out that night.”

“Then, why are you so down?” She asked. “He’s your best friend since forever. I trust him and you trust him.”

“I don’t know, mom,” You felt tears form. “It’s just that - I’m scared. You know how risky it is for humans to be mates with werewolves. Remember Mingyu’s mother? She survived the transformation but she died after giving birth. I want to see the whole world when I’m 80, mom. I don’t want to die so young.”

Your mother hugged you. You knew she didn’t have an answer. She was fortunate enough to not be soulmates with a werewolf.

“You know, sweetheart, I had to give up a lot of things when I decided to marry your dad. I had to give up my wild nights with friends, my freedom of being single, the apartment that I loved so much. I loved these things so much because they made me who I am.” She said. “But you know what? I never missed them. I would trade so many of my yesterdays to have a tomorrow with your father. It was scary at first, I almost ran away during our wedding. But every night he would come up to me and make me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, I immediately thanked God I never ran away.”

“That’s sweet and all, mom, but you’re not gonna die if you and dad mate.” You said bitterly through tears.

“I know, sweetheart. I know it’s unfair to you. But, I don’t want you to die without the love of your life on your side. Johnny is a good man. He would fight all of the odds for you and you, out of all the people in this world, should know that.” She said. “Our lives are full of risks. This wont be the only risk that you’ll take during your life.”

Later that night, you stared at the polaroid pictures that are glued on your wall. These were pictures of you, Johnny, and your friends. Your eyes landed on a picture of Johnny with a tub of ice cream. He knew you love ice cream so whenever you feel down, rest assured that he will be on your side with a tub of ice cream. He just knew what to do. It was like he was made to be your perfect fit. Almost immediately, you came into the conclusion that you were willing to risk it for Johnny. You were tired of feeling worried over things that haven’t happened yet.

---

You woke up with a livelier spirit than yesterday. You were still worried of what will Johnny say but the only thing you can do for now is not worry about things that haven’t happened. You decided to give him his favorite yogurt and flower as a peace offering. Today, you are willing to sort things out with him. You couldn’t bear another day with things not okay between you two. Before you left your house, you asked the sky above to give you a sign. You were willing to take whatever sign it gives you.

You entered the lecture hall and noticed that everyone’s mood was gloomy. Your professor, Mrs. Bae, was already in front with a sad frown on her face. Did someone die today? She waited for two more people to arrive before speaking. You were worried that it might be someone from your circle or worse, Johnny.

“We received the news early this morning that one of your classmate, Kim Soohyun, passed away last night.” She spoke. “Let’s give a moment of silence for her, her family, her friends, and her significant other, Choi Hansol.”

Your breath hitched when Mrs. Bae mentioned Hansol as her significant other. Hansol belonged to Johnny’s pack, meaning he is a werewolf. And Soohyun was human. As if on cue, Nayeon whispered to you.

“I heard she died from transformation.” She looked at you with so much worry on her eyes.

Your heart was beating so much and you started to struggle catching up with it. Today was supposed to be the day you agree on being Johnny’s mate. You shouldn’t have asked for a sign. Earlier, you were so sure of your decisions. Now, you weren’t sure if you wanna see Johnny today. Looks like the universe really fucking hates your guts. You were supposed to have your peace of mind. You looked down at the yogurt and flower that you were supposed to give Johnny. You refused to believe that Soohyun’s death was a sign for you to rethink your decision but sooner or later, you found yourself throwing the flower to the nearest garbage bin and eating Johnny’s yogurt.

---

Day by day, you feel your friendship with Johnny deteriorating slowly. Soohyun’s death shouldn’t have affected you so much but for some strange reason, it did.

“You’re really not gonna fix anything by avoiding your problems.” Your friend, Jaehyun spoke beside you. You really shouldn’t be talking to him because you knew as one of Johnny’s closest friend, he would never stop convincing you to talking with Johnny. Jaehyun was also a member of Johnny’s pack. Jaehyun’s father is Johnny’s father’s right hand, meaning he is the beta of the pack. Jaehyun and Johnny are so close to each other, probably much closer than you and Johnny. You knew he would always have Johnny’s back just like you do. So, it doesn’t surprise you if he wanted to fix the problem between you and Johnny.

“How is he?” You asked, genuinely concerned for Johnny.

“To be really honest, I don’t think he can graduate if this problem doesn’t get solved.” He replied. “You probably think that I’m exaggerating this for you to talk to him immediately. Our graduation is just around the corner. If you don’t want to put your future at risk, at least don’t try to put his on a tight rope as well.”

You hated the fact that he was right. You were starting to feel selfish, too cowardly. Johnny was always brave whenever you needed help. It was time you became brave for him.

---

The loud music blasted through the walls of Lucas’ house. Here is where all the college parties are held. Lucas is also one of your closest friends. He’s a human who is dating Wendy, a vampire. Tonight was the farewell party of the graduating class of this year. You weren’t in the mood to come but you knew Johnny was gonna be here since he one of the graduating students.

You decided to get at least a little bit tipsy before you confront Johnny. With the help of your ever-supportive friends, your mind was hazy immediately. It was not a hassle for you to find him in parties. He is either playing beer pong, in the kitchen mixing up drinks with Taeyong, or in the dance floor with the other friends you shared. You spotted him standing quietly near the snacks corner. You know the reason why he isn’t as upbeat as he usually is. You stood next to him and he immediately noticed you. You didn’t know what to do or what to say.

“Hi.” You squeaked out.

“Hey,” He replied, giving you a warm smile. The smile that you fell in love with. You haven’t seen that smile in a while.

“I would give anything to see that smile for the rest of your life” It took you a few seconds to realize that you said that out loud. Damn this cocktail.

“Yeah, nice to see you again too, Y/N,” You noticed how his mood seemed to lit up. He looked down on you. You both haven’t said so much but he knew that things are finally okay. He got the picture.

“So, is this your response about what he learned during my birthday?” He said, lifting his cup to drink whatever is left of the drink.

“Yeah, look. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I put you through hell because I was too much of a coward to talk to you. I’m sorry that I left you all confused and-” Your ranting got cut off when you felt his soft lips against yours. Each movement of his lips signifies his undying love for you. It signifies how he will always forgive you and accept your flaws that annoyed him to the core. It signifies that he wanted you to know that you were his and he was yours, forever. He lead you through the balcony of Lucas’ house, where no one was present.

“I love you,” You said after you pulled away. “I’m willing to risk everything for you. I would trade all my tomorrows for at least a minute with you.”

You didn’t realize that you were crying until he was wiping your cheeks with his thumb. His hands still cups your face as he stares down at you. You were expecting him to say the same but all you saw his head shaking from left to right.

“No,” he whispered. “I love you too, Y/N, so much. I’ve loved you for as long as I could remember. All the nights we spent tangled up in each other and telling one another how we’re just friends. All the make out session we had in the back of my car. The best of times, the worst of times. I’ve loved you through it all. But I can’t do this to you, Y/N. You deserve to live the best life you’ve set up for yourself until you grow old and wrinkly.”

You stared at him, tears flowing from your eyes. He hated seeing you cry. He could kill anyone or anything that made you cry. “You can do this with me, Johnny. If I die, at least I die by your side. I will die knowing that you made me yours. And to the die by your side is the perfect way I could die.”

He continued shaking his head, his own tears staining his flawless skin. “We don’t have to transform you.”

“But you need an heir. You need an offspring to be the next alpha after you.” You replied. “And I want to give that to you.”

“God knows how much I want to start a family with you too.” He said.

“Then, what’s stopping you, Johnny?” You asked him. You were so desperate to leave this party with you and Johnny being okay.

“I love you. That’s what’s stopping me.” He responded. The effects of the alcohol was slowly leaving your system. You were growing tired of this fight. You were never a patient woman but you pushed through just to make this right.

You remained in silence, looking up at the starry night. You asked the sky for one more sign. If only the answer to everything was written in the sky, you would have it all by now. But life doesn’t work that way. Sometimes, you have to ruin yourself to find the answer.

“I accepted a job offer in the city today. I leave in 2 days.” He said all of sudden. There. There was your sign. You sighed and look at him, with pride and sadness. You were so proud of him. You saw him struggle with college and now he immediately has a job in the city. But you were also sad. He accepted it without even talking to you - his best friend, and his soulmate. You couldn’t blame him. He probably wanted to get away from you after everything.

---

Johnny leaves for the city tomorrow morning. You have wallowed in self-pity the whole day. You looked at yourself in the mirror and saw how wrecked you looked. If only you fixed this as soon as possible, he probably wouldn’t leave. You scratched that thought out of your head. That was selfish. Johnny pushed aside his feeling for you so that you could have your dream. It’s time for you to stop being selfish and let him have his. You decided you wanted to see him before he left. This will probably the last time you will see each other so you were determined to fix the broken bond between you two.

You arrived at his house after a few minutes. His house wasn’t far from yours. The moment he opened his door, you attached your lips into his. You kissed him as if you’re begging for him to not leave you. He lead you both to his room and locked the door.

He kissed you first on the lips and soon, he traveled down your neck. The back of your needs hit the edge of his bed and he gently laid you down on it. It’s been a while since the last time you slept together. You weren’t planning on sleeping with him tonight but you wanted to make sure his last night with you was worth it.

It took an hour for the both of you to finish making love. Your head laid on his chest as your limbs tangled upon each other.

“You’re leaving tomorrow.” You announced.

“Yep,” He responded. His fingers drew relaxing figures on your bare back. “Okay.”

You looked up at him, confusion written on your face. What did he mean by “okay”?

Sensing your inquiring stare, he responded, “I can’t accept a life wherein I don’t get to hold you every night.”

He sat up on the edge of his bed, the moonlight that shone through his window lighted up his face. You followed, resting your chin on his shoulder as your arms wrapped around his body savoring the last moments before he leaves for the city.

“Find me immediately after you design a house, a building, something.” He said with conviction, staring deeply into your eyes as if wanting you to memorize what he is saying. “Find me immediately. I will wait for you. Even if it takes a couple more years.”

You felt tears streaming down your cheeks. You love him so much. You would take any compromise only if it means being with him in the end. You nodded, pressing a kiss on his shoulder.

“No other love, except me.” He stated.

“No other love, only you.” You said.

a/n: i hope you enjoyed this! as always, feedback and requests are always welcome.

[missnight0wl]

Wayward Son

I finally succumbed and wrote an AU fanfic where Jacob dies. It focuses on a few moments between the siblings over the years after the Cursed Vaults. And to be fair, death aspect aside, most of it is basically canon for their relationship.

And yes, the title is a reference to the song by Kansas because it does make me think of Jacob.

Words: 5560

Autumn, 1991

When Helena declared that she wanted to stay longer at home after her graduation, her parents seemed to take it as an obvious decision. Physically, she was completely well even before September. She wasn’t going to waste it, so she started helping at the grandparents’ bakery. Mentally, however… She still needed to heal. And they all needed some time together.

Jacob stayed at home as well. He insisted that he wanted to pass his N.E.W.T.s, and with some help from Dumbledore, he managed to get permission to take exams in June next year without going back to school. He was studying a bit, but usually, he was spending his days similar to his sister: trying to find his place. It had to be more difficult for him because of his absence. Some things had changed their place at the house, people had altered some of their customs. He got new habits too. For their mother, it was especially hard to accept his smoking. Nevertheless, they were surviving, learning each other anew. Helena liked in particular when they were catching up on all pop culture Jacob had missed. It felt familiar, almost like childhood. Almost like it could be normal again.

The days weren’t the worst with all their distractions. When the nights fell, though, it meant either sleepless hours or endless nightmares. If Helena woke up with a scream, Jacob would always run into her room, sitting on her bed and cradling her.

“Shhh. It’s okay, you’re safe,” he’d say, stroking her hair. “I’m here, I’m finally here. It’s just a dream…”

But it hardly was just a dream. Usually, it was her memories - and Jacob knew that.

“Will you sing to me?” she asked quietly once when she calmed down.

He chuckled softly. “Aren’t you too old for that?”

“Please?”

He sighed, left without a choice. They both got more comfortable on the bed, although Jacob was probably too tall for that. He cleared his throat, yet his voice was rather raspy when he began. It didn’t occur to her that he probably hadn’t sung in ages. Still, it quickly turned into a sound she remembered from years ago. Only before the last verse, he made a longer pause.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

You make me happy when skies are grey.

You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you.

Please, don’t take my sunshine away.

Spring, 1992

They were sitting at the table, and she was sceptically watching him staring at his books.

“You don’t need it, Jacob.”

He glanced at her before starting to browse pages. “But I want it.”

“Then why you’re just pretending that you’re studying?”

He cracked a smile, already knowing where she’s going with that. “Because I know most of those things.”

“See? Then you don’t need it.” She leant back in her chair. “Admit it, you’re just stalling before moving on.”

“Fine, maybe a little,” he replied, finally looking at her again.

She shook her head and sighed. “Bill should be here any moment now. I’ll go get my things.”

She left the room and went upstairs. She’d packed most of her belonging, but she still wanted to double-check everything. Besides, it’d take her mind off Jacob for a while. She was a little worried about him, but she didn’t want to nudge him. It was always hard to recognise if he was going through something because he was great at redirecting people’s attention, but it wasn’t even about him suppressing his emotions. It seemed like he was trying to get back the stolen time and feared that leaving would make it lost forever. As a result, he was stuck. He was offered a job at Gringotts with Helena, but he refused, making excuses about his exams. She wanted to do more for him, but she was ready for the next step, and she felt that if she wouldn’t take it, she’d got stuck as well.

She gathered her luggage and was about to get back to the living room when she heard Jacob and Bill talking.

“You sure you don’t want anything? Tea, water?”

“No, thanks.”

There was a moment of silence before Jacob spoke again. “You know, I never got a chance to thank you.”

“Hm?”

“For being a brother to her. When I failed--”

“Don’t,” Bill tried to interrupt him.

“No, I mean it. Thank you for taking care of her.” He took a deep breath before continuing, more tentatively. “It’s weird to think that you probably know her better than I ever could...”

Another pause preceded Bill asking: “What was she like as a child?”

“Oh.” Jacob got surprised by that question, but when he started to talk, Helena could almost hear him smiling. “She was like sunshine. Brightening your day and pissing off when she shone straight into your eyes. I suppose you know how it can be with younger siblings.” Bill laughed, and Jacob went on. “She… she was so curious about everything. They say there’s a certain age when kids won’t stop asking questions, but for Helena it was permanent. And she always had to defend everyone. Y’know, when Snape started teaching us, I complained about him back home, and she was like: you can’t say that, you don’t know him.” He modified his tone slightly to imitate her. “Maybe he has problems. You’re sometimes mean when you’re upset, too, but you’re a good person.”

They both chuckled.

“Well, she did change her mind on Snape, I can tell you that,” said Bill. “But other than that, sounds pretty much like Helena I know. Give her some time, Jacob. Give yourself time.”

The silence between them was longer now, so Helena took a few steps back to get some natural speed and pushed the door open. Two wizards were standing opposite each other and got startled when she entered.

“I thought I hear you,” she grinned at Bill. “What are you two plotting here, hm?”

“Oh, nothing at all,” the redhead replied with an innocent expression.

“Just gossiping about you,” Jacob added casually.

She gave them a suspicious stare. “Is that so?” She’d love to tease them, but they had to arrive with Bill at the appointed hour, so she glanced at her watch instead and then at her friend. “All right, I think I’m ready. We can get going.”

“You sure you have everything?” asked Jacob. Their parents said their goodbyes in the morning before leaving to work, so he took the responsibility of sending Helena off. “Mum left you package in the kitchen, did you take it? Do you have sunglasses? The cooler ones? What about sun cream?”

“I have everything,” she stopped his babbling with a hug.

“Be careful there, okay?”

She tightened her embrace in respond, feeling his ribs against her body. He still didn’t put on much weight.

Winter, 1994

Dear Jacob,

What the fuck do you mean you’re not coming? It’s Dad’s sixtieth birthday. SIXTIETH. You have to come. I don’t care what other plans you have - you knew about that day. Tell that pretty girl (or whatever you’re busy with nowadays) that you have responsibilities at home.

Seriously though, I know that you want to be here too, so… Please, try to make it.

Love you always,

- Ellie

“I can’t believe he didn’t come.”

“It’s all right, Ellie,” said Christopher. “I’m sure something just came up. He can visit us at the weekend.”

“Something came up? On your birthday?” Helena spat. “You know, but it’s not even that. He could’ve just let us know, say anything. It’s hard for all of us, but why he shouldn’t be trying too?”

Alice gave her a stern look. “Well, now you’re just picking on him.”

“I’m not! Mum, you got him a job at the Ministry. A good job. And what did he do? He quit--”

“That job was a bad idea from the beginning. You’d probably quit as well.”

“No, I wouldn’t!”

Alice only smiled softly. “You’re really not that different. Believe me, I know.”

The truth was that Helena was picking on Jacob. She indeed had no reasons to be mad at him, other than him not showing up on that specific day. He did quit his job, that part was accurate. But while she was certain that he’s getting in all sorts of troubles ever since, he never caused problems for them. He always appeared when his help was needed, during holidays or not. On top of that, Helena caught him a couple of times hiding money in places like a sugar bowl since their parents wouldn’t simply take it from him. But all of that made the current situation only worse. In the best-case scenario, it meant that he’s not telling her something big enough to stop him without giving any explanation. He could also be hurt, kidnapped, or worse…

“All I’m saying is that he has no excuse. Even if he’s too drunk or high to Apparate, he could’ve used stupid Floo Network or--”

And then, just like on command, the emerald green flames appeared in the fireplace, and Jacob entered the room, appearing quite confused.

“Did I make it?” he asked nobody in particular. He beamed when he looked at the clock. It was half-past eleven. He faced Christopher, spreading his arms wide. “Happy birthday, old chap.”

Over the whole day, the birthday man was trying to act unaffected by Jacob’s absence. Yet, he obviously got happier seeing his son.

“I’m so, so sorry that I’m late,” Jacob continued, not breaking their hug. “But! I do have an explanation!”

Helena rolled her eyes. Of course he did. Still, she got curious when he reached to his bag and took out a package covered in brown paper.

“I’ve found a lead for that a while ago, however, a bloke who was supposed to get it for me had some problems, and… let’s say he needed a reminder. Anyway, it created a delay, and long story short, I couldn’t risk not getting it at all after all the effort, so… That happened. And I’m really sorry once again, I should’ve known better from the beginning. But! At least I got some wine!”

When Christopher started to unwrap the gift, Jacob hurried to welcome both Alice and Helena.

“Oh my, is it the first edition?” Christopher was already holding an old book in his hands, studying the front page, his eyes twinkling.

“One of the first ones,” clarified Jacob. “But it has notes made by a professor from Uagadou.”

The old man looked at him excited before carefully browsing a couple of pages. “Oh, I have to compare it with my atlas. I’ll be right back.”

He left the room, patting Jacob on a shoulder while passing by. When he was gone, Alice looked attentively at her son.

“And I wonder how much did it cost you?”

Jacob shrugged and smirked. “A lovely dinner with my family.” He opened his bag again, pulling out two bottles of wine. “Did everyone leave already?”

“They did, not long before you came,” Alice replied softly.

To break the silence, Helena grabbed one of the bottles. “What about that wine? It looks fancy.”

“It is quite fancy. But this one is for Dad, and for Mum. We have the other one.” She looked at the other label and frowned her nose. “It’s the cheapest one they had, and it tastes like acid.” Jacob was clearly amused by his sister’s reaction.

Alice got up. “I’ll go bring some glasses then, how about that?” Then, she also left, letting the siblings stay alone.

“You’re mad at me, aren’t you?” Jacob asked finally.

“I thought we agreed to no secrets.”

This time it was him who rolled his eyes. “It’s no secret! I just wanted it to be a surprise!”

“Still, you could’ve told me! I’d cover for you!”

He was quiet for a moment, pondering on his words. A corner of his lips twitched faintly. “You know you’re terrible at surprises, Ellie.”

“That’s not true!” she said reproachfully. He only raised his eyebrow. “Oh, because I’d go to Dad and tell him everything, right?”

“No, but you’d tell Mum, and she’s no better than you.”

She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. Then, not thinking much, she opened the cheaper bottle and took a sip. She grimaced, regretting her decision immediately.

“I warned you it tastes like acid.” He was trying very hard to hold a laugh. “It gets somewhat better the more you drink.”

All four of them were sitting and talking until the late night, so by the time Helena woke up the next day, it was already noon. She got down to the kitchen where she found an unfinished bottle of wine as it turned out that Jacob brought bigger supplies with him. She took a clean glass and poured some liquor when her brother showed up out of nowhere and snatched it out of her hand.

“Ah ah ah, what do you think you’re doing?” he teased her.

She sighed. “I’m having a drink.”

“No, you’re not, young lady.”

“Jacob, I’m twenty-one. If I want to have a drink, you’re not gonna stop me.”

“I don’t care how old you are. It’s only past twelve.”

She gave him a stink eye because he was holding two glasses at the moment: hers and his own. “I’m guessing it’s your third one, you hypocrite.”

He seemed a bit perplexed for an instant, but then he grinned. “Only the second.” Still, he put both glasses on the side when Helena started brewing coffee.

“So, what you’re planning now?” she asked and covered a yawn.

“Like today or in general?”

“Both, I guess.”

“Well,” he started. “I wanted to visit grandparents’ today. That’s probably most of the day. And in general, I thought I could stay with you for a little.”

“Oh! But… I’m getting back to work.”

“I know. I wouldn’t bother you, I can get busy on my own or help you, whichever you prefer. And in the evenings, we could do something fun. What d’you say?”

Every now and then, Jacob would stop by whenever she was currently at her curse-breaking mission. However, he never stayed for long. They’d usually get out once, and after making sure she’s alright, he’d disappear. Spending more time together could be nice.

“Sure, sounds good,” she replied with a smile, filling two mugs with coffee.

Summer, 1995

Jacob was pacing between walls, running his fingers through his hair once in a while.

“We should leave,” he said eventually, stopping and crossing his arms.

Helena looked at him in disbelief. “What?”

“We should leave. I don’t know, to the States or whatever.”

“There’s a war coming, and you want to leave?”

“Yeah, exactly. You’re not gonna tell me it’s not a better solution than becoming Dumbledore’s soldier.”

She opened her mouth and closed it again, not being able to find the words. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Jacob, innocent people will be dying!”

“I know! You think I don’t?!” He started losing control over his voice. “But there are people ready to fight for them, and we don’t have to be among them! Even if Voldemort is back, he never got beyond Great Britain, so there’s no reason to think it’d be different any time soon. We’d be safe across the ocean.”

“How can you be so selfish?”

“I’m selfish?!” He made a sound between a gasp and a snigger, but when he spoke again, he was more steady. “Ellie, who helped you with the Cursed Vaults? Dumbledore? Who cared when we had to stop R which was, let me remind you, an international threat?”

“Oh, so that’s why we should do nothing now? Because that’s how we were treated? Do you hear yourself?! An eye for an eye and the whole world goes blind, Jacob, and passiveness can be as bad as violence! There will be more wizards thinking like you, but if we all leave, who’ll stay to fight?”

He wasn’t looking at her, and he switched to almost a whisper. “I was never selfish in my life. Never selfish enough to let the adults deal with all the cursed mess, as they should. Though, you know? Maybe I was selfish, maybe I just wanted to feel useful, fucking protector of everyone.” He sighed. “But you know where it got me? My best friend died when he was just fifteen, I had to leave my family, and I was imprisoned for years by R. Ellie, I…” His voice cracked and he swallowed hard, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Just for once, I don’t want to worry about people being in danger. If it’s selfish of me, so be it.” Their eyes finally met. “I don’t care. I just want some peace.”

“Well, that’s not how life works.”

She left, not giving him a chance to reply.

The rest of the day, she spent with some of her friends, learning more about the whole situation connected to Voldemort’s return. The first shock - caused also by Cedric’s death - had passed, and they had to focus on planning. Still, Helena kept going back in thoughts to Jacob. She probably was too harsh on him. She saw where he’s coming from. In fact, sending their parents off to the family in the States wasn’t a bad idea at all. She came home late, so she went straight to her bedroom to think things over.

The next morning, however, it was neither Christopher nor Alice who she found in the kitchen – it was Jacob.

“What you’re doing here?”

“Breakfast,” he replied blandly.

“No, I mean, I thought you’d just leave after yesterday.”

“Someone has to keep an eye on everything when you’re in Egypt, don’t you think?”

“I didn’t tell you I’m going back there…”

“Yeah, well.”

He was chopping some vegetables while eggs were frying on a pan. There’s a joking rule in their family that you could use magic in the kitchen only if you’d learnt to make the dish also without it. Jacob always preferred to prepare things Muggle way, though. Helena could never match him, even with the help of the spells.

“Thank you,” she said abashedly, sitting at the kitchen island.

“For what? Food’s not ready.”

“For joining our side.”

“No, my dear. Let’s make it clear,” he spoke firmly, involuntarily pointing a knife in her direction. “I’m on no one’s side but yours. Got it?”

“So… you’re not joining the Order?”

“Hell no.”

“Well, thank you anyway,” she repeated. “And I’m sorry. For yesterday. I don’t think you’re selfish at all.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He still sounded a bit coldly, but he smirked ever so slightly. “Just…” His voice got softer as he knitted his brows in a worried expression. “I beg you, Ellie, be smart. Just because you’ll be outside Europe doesn’t mean it’ll be safe. It’ll be hell everywhere. And above all, remember: no information is worth dying for.”

“I know, I know…” She reassured him, though it felt like there’s not much she could say. “So, what are you planning to do?”

“I dunno,” he shrugged. “Maybe I could renew some connections in Knockturn Alley.”

“Oh, because that sounds very safe.”

“No, it doesn’t,” he cut in. “I’m aware of that. And that was my point. If you get involved, it’ll always be dangerous. But because you’re too stubborn to listen, I can’t simply… sit and watch, y’know. I don’t want to hear from some strangers one day: Hey, remember that cursed siblings? Yeah, the younger one just died. She was killed by fucking Death Eaters because she refused to learn from her brother’s mistakes. And he screwed up again because he could’ve done something.”

She bit her lips to hide a smile. Jacob only glanced at her, shaking his head with feigned disapproval before he focused back at his cooking.

May 1998

It was getting crowded at the Hog’s Head when Helena spotted Jacob near the door waving his hand at her. She immediately rushed to him.

“Jacob! You came!”

He frowned in confusion. “Of course. I told you so.”

“I guess part of me wanted you to not come…”

“Do you really think I’d let you go into a battle alone?” he asked raising his eyebrow.

“I’m not alone,” she replied, mindlessly pulling his flannel. “And you don’t want to be here.”

“And I don’t want you to be here either. But I know I won’t convince you to leave because Charlie’s here. And he’s here because his whole family is here. And I’m definitely not gonna discuss with all the Weasleys because it’d be both pointless and possibly stupid.” His smile faded away when Helena didn’t even react to his joke. “Hey, we faced worse before, didn’t we? At least we’re not the main target for a change, right?”

She nodded haltingly as Jacob embraced her with one arm, leading away from the entrance.

By the time they arrived at Hogwarts, the battle was raging. It was overwhelming chaos with troops of people storming to the castle. Helena was keeping both Charlie and Jacob in the reach of her sight, but as they were in the Entrance Hall, one scream caught their attention among all the noises.

“Fire! There’s a fire!” yelled someone.

“Then put it down!” they heard in a respond.

“I can’t! They had to cast Fiendfyre!”

Three of them froze. If it actually was the curse, there’s no way students could deal with it, and it’d be bad to let it spread. On the other hand, it could’ve been regular fire, looking more dangerous due to fear and panic.

“I’ll go check it,” decided Jacob. “We’ll meet in the Great Hall. Look after her, okay?” he added, smirking at Charlie.

Helena briefly squeezed his hand. “Be careful.”

In the next moment, Jacob was running up the staircase while Helena and Charlie joined the crowd moving to the Great Hall where most of the fighting was occurring. It seemed like they’re gaining the advantage over Death Eaters, but it was still heated, and spells were shooting from all sides. Helena had just helped some girls counter an attack and was looking for Charlie when she felt a sudden sharp headache. For a split second, her vision went black, which was enough distraction to not notice a beam of light speeding in her direction. She tried to dodge it, but it was too late, and the spell grazed her side, causing her to fall.

“Nell!” Charlie appeared almost out of nowhere and kneeled next to her. “Are you all right? Talk to me…”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” she hurried to calm him down, though she grimaced with pain.

Charlie quickly checked the spot where she was hit. Her blouse was torn, revealing red skin, but there was no wound. “Come on, let’s take you from here.”

He helped her get up and led her to the edges of the room where he spotted Ben Copper tending to two students.

“Ben! We need you!”

The Healer hearing his name turned his head to them. “What happened?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” replied Helena. “I can--”

“No, you have to rest at least,” Charlie cut in. “Keep an eye on her, Ben.”

He deflected one more spell and run back into the fight. Ben in the meantime tried to examine her, but she gently pushed him away.

“It’s nothing, really. There’s no time for that.”

She was calm but determined, so Ben didn’t push. “All right, but you’re not going back there. I need some cover when I take care of those two.”

He pointed to a Hufflepuff girl and a Ravenclaw boy behind them, both visibly scared. Helena nodded and took her position. Everyone’s attention seemed to concentrate towards the centre of the Great Hall, so they weren’t being attacked directly, but stray curses almost hit them a couple of times. Helena also managed to stop some Death Eaters, whether from escaping or assaulting the others.

Suddenly, the shouting in the middle became louder, and the whole atmosphere got more tense. Helena was too far to tell what’s it about exactly, though - until almost all went silent. She exchanged questioning looks with Ben.

“Go, see what’s happening,” he told her.

When she finally broke into the crowd, she realised that everyone was paralysed because of the encounter within the circle. The Boy Who Lived was facing the Dark Lord. She tensely watched them moving in constant distance between them, looking ready to attack. She listened to the story of the Elder Wand, of the big intrigue behind that war.  And then, with just one hit from both sides, it was over. Voldemort was dead.

The joyful cheering exploded around her. Everyone was trying to reach Harry Potter now, pushing her in that direction. But she needed to find someone else. She was scanning people in search of familiar faces to finally pick up Charlie’s. She ran right into his arms, laughing with relief. However, when she made sure that he’s all right, she felt a wave of anxiety.

“Have you seen Jacob?” she asked, holding onto his arm.

Charlie shook his head and his face got graver. “There are so many people. I still haven’t seen everyone.”

“I better go search for him…”

“I’m sure he’s fine.” He sounded confident, but she knew it was only because she needed to hear that. Anything could’ve happened, and a bad feeling was growing inside her chest.

She left the Great Hall, going oppositely to the most. She didn’t get far when she met Rowan, and she almost sobbed at her sight.

“Helen!”

“Rowan! You’re all right!” she whimpered, hugging her tightly. “Oh god, I didn’t see you at all, I didn’t know--”

Her voice cracked, so Rowan started patting her back calmingly. When they finally parted, Helena noticed an open wound on her friend’s arm.

“Oh god, you’re not all right!”

“It’s not a big deal.” Rowan waved her hand. “I’ll take care of it in a moment.”

Helena frowned, but she nodded and swallowed hard. “Have you seen Jacob somewhere?”

Rowan’s eyes got wider. “No, I haven’t. I thought he’d be with you.”

“He was. But then we got separated.”

“He’s probably helping people around the castle. There’s a lot of the injured. Do you want me to help you find him?”

Helena looked at her arm and took a deep breath. “No. It doesn’t look good, you better have it checked.”

Rowan hesitated, but she agreed to go see the Healers while Helena continued her search, walking faster through the debris, calling Jacob’s name. She started to think that perhaps they missed each other and she should return… when she finally spotted him on one of the higher levels. He was lying unconscious under the wall. There had to be a cut on his head because blood covered a part of his face.

“No…”

She approached him slowly as if it could delay the terrible truth. She fell to her knees and leant over him, cupping his face.

“Jacob, can you hear me?” She brushed his cheek with her thumb. “Open your eyes, Jacob…” She laid her fingers on his neck. There was no pulse. “Open your eyes, please,” she repeated. “Don’t do this to me…”

She wanted to believe that if she waited long enough, if she’d be patient enough, he’d come back – just like Rowan. That it’s not real, just another lie in her life. But at the same time, she knew that Jacob was truly gone. It was a battle, and he was just one of the casualties.  She didn’t even know how he died.

She sat on the ground, leaning on the wall, and pulled Jacob up on her chest. She wasn’t sure how long she was holding him before she heard footsteps and Charlie got down next to her. He didn’t speak.

“It’s not fair, Charlie,” she whispered, sniffling.

“I know.”

“It wasn’t his war, he didn’t even want to fight. We should’ve left as he said.”

Charlie tried to touch her arm, but she got startled, so he just sat by her side instead.

“He already saved that fucking school! And for what?!” she cried out. “To be killed like that?!”

Her last words turned into a shriek. She pulled Jacob’s body up again as it was slipping from her grasp. He was too heavy, and she was too tired to carry him. Some more time had passed before they were found by Ben.

“Helen…” he started softly. “I’m so sorry. But we have to take him to the Great Hall.”

She finally raised her head and looked at them. Ben was squatting in front of her, Charlie still in the same place. She took a deep breath and carefully rested Jacob against the wall. Then, Charlie helped her stand up once more that day, and she immediately buried her face in his chest. She couldn’t watch Jacob being taken away. When she looked at Charlie, though, she recognised that there’s more bad news to come.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, trying to contain trembling of her voice. “Who else?”

His eyes were glistening. “Tonks… and her husband… they didn’t make it.” Helena covered her mouth with both hands. “And Fred--” The words stuck in his throat.

“He’s just a kid…” she murmured, hugging him again. “I’m sorry, Charlie…”

She wanted to stay with him and comfort him. She wanted to find Rowan and make sure that nobody else got hurt. But all the noises were overwhelming, and she felt like she started suffocating.

“I have to get out of here. I’m sorry…”

She somehow reached the exit, not fully registering things around her. Only some young excited wizard stopped her when she was about to leave.

“We won! Can you believe it?!”

“Did we, really…?”

He was too thrilled to notice her blank stare, and so he quickly went his way. As soon as Helena got outside, she choked on the morning air. She sat on the stairs and embraced herself in an attempt to control the shaking of her body.

“Hey, may I?”

Another minutes or hours escaped her attention. This time, it was Talbott standing above her. She nodded without a word, and he took a seat on one of the steps.

“I’ve heard about your brother. I’m really sorry.”

She bit her lips to stop a weep, but the tears fell down her face. They were sitting a long moment in silence.

“Will it always hurt?” she finally said weakly.

Talbott watched her with compassion. “Yeah.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Move on,” he replied softly. “Find something worth forgetting about the pain. And most importantly, always remember the good things.” He hesitated before patting her shoulder. “Tonks would want us to celebrate the victory,” he added with a sad smile. “You know where to find me if you need to.”

And like that, she was left alone. She hid her face in her hands. It suddenly occurred to her that her parents probably didn’t know anything yet, so she wondered whether she should go back to the castle or home. But then, she was disturbed again.

“Hey, are you all right?”

She had to shade her eyes from the sun to see who’s talking to her. To her surprise, it was Harry Potter himself. The Boy Who Lived who just defeated the Dark Lord was asking her if she’s all right. He was the same age as her when she entered the final Cursed Vault. The same age as Jacob when he joined R. She suddenly felt bad because if her experience taught her anything, probably nobody showed much concern about Harry in all of that. When the wizarding world would stop relying on children to solve their problems?

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.”

He took a closer look at her. “Do we know each other?”

“No, I don’t think so. I mean, I know you…”

“No, but I’m pretty sure I saw you at the Burrow.”

“Oh!” She smiled faintly at that remark. It was almost funny that they never had an occasion to be introduced properly. “That is possible, indeed.”

“Well, nice to finally meet you then. I’m Harry.”

He reached out his hand to her. He appeared as exhausted as she felt. “Helena.”

“Are you sure you don’t need anything?”

She nodded. “Don’t mind me. But I guess you could use some help with those blankets.”

She took a part of the armful he was carrying, and they headed together back inside. She started helping wherever it was needed. She found Rowan being tended to by Ben and who was upset with him because he didn’t let her go find Helena – but he insisted that Rowan’s wound might’ve been too serious. She spent some time with the Weasleys, grieving over Fred. She was trying to keep herself busy and bring consolation to the others.

And the same thought was motivating her in years to come, just to not let herself get lost in the emptiness. Eventually, she even learnt to be happy again. But nothing could change the fact that in the Battle of Hogwarts she lost not only brother and friends. Part of herself died that day as well.

[foolgobi65]

Mahabharata (any characters or pairing) + college au + meet messy + “alexa, play wonderwall.” (at this point im just picking things at random lol)

play wonderwall : you’ll see lol  basically used this as an excuse to write a version of the scene u and i both acknowledge as our favorite. the single most iconic scene in the entire epic, bar none. for our sake, i really hope that you like it!! also the “meet messy” is basically random people in the crowd meeting this trainwreck of a family in all of its glory. also i think rhea’s modern au krishna goes by shyam yadav??? i tried to use a different first name at least but none of them sounded as nice so i gave up lol sorry rhea. 

--

“Are you fucking kidding me?” 

It seems like the entire university is gathered on the front lawn to watch the swearing-in ceremony of new Union President Dharamraj Kuru after what many reported to be the nastiest student election season perhaps ever seen. Jarasandha Magadh, after years of refusing to graduate, had at the last minute been put in the hospital and, apparently, sustained injuries so extensive that it had effectively argued that his already completed coursework should be all that was counted when factoring in his final mark. 

“Especially given said student’s...extensive history...with this institution,” Shyam had apparently said when arguing Jarasandha’s case to University Administration, Jarasandha himself completely unaware and apparently furious when he was brought out of his medically induced coma. 

Jarasandha’s party’s hastily promoted candidate Sahadeva was wildly acknowledged to be weak, young, and meant to be nothing more than a rubber stamp on business as usual. Dharamraj, whose upstart campaign effectively communicated how poorly “business as usual” had treated the student body, was suddenly flooded with factions of students seeking an alliance so that their respective organizations might be allocated larger portions of the budget everyone assumed Dharamraj would soon control. 

Everyone was right. Dharamraj won in a landslide, and now here everybody is, watching him deliver his maiden speech as their new President. 

“Shisupal,” Dharamraj sighs, “what exactly is your problem?” 

“My problem,” Shisupal shrieks, walking up to the dais from where Dharamraj stands, surrounded by his friends, family, and his girlfriend Yagna. “You’re asking me what my problem is, Brother?” 

“Brother?” someone in the crowd asks, too low to be heard at the front. 

“I think they’re related on their mother’s side,” someone else responds. “Both their mothers are sisters, but Pritha was adopted out to a friend of her father so was never close to her biological siblings.” 

“Jesus,” another laughs, “are they all just cousins?” 

A wide assortment of Kurus stand on stage, jubilant after so many years of them trying and failing to win elections at the university their fathers had once ruled. Yagna, from a prominent family herself, at Dharamraj’s side. Shyam Yadav, whose sister Subhadra is in love with Dhananjaya and whose father was like a brother to Pritha when she was lonely in Kuntibhoj and Vasudev not imprisoned with his wife. 

Yes, they really are all just cousins. 

Vrikodara steps in front of Dharamraj, arms crossed and looming nearly half a metre taller than Shishupal. Yet, Shishupal is not cowed -- though many men more intelligent than he would have been. 

“I’m not afraid of you, asshole. Everyone knows you’re just the gun in Dharamraj’s hand, and your brother is a pacifist. You won’t touch me.” 

“You would be surprised,” Dharamraj says mildly, smiling slightly as the crowd laughs at the thought of violence from the slightly frail Dharma, always seen in the library or sitting under the tree outside it, smoking cigarettes as he argues with professors twice his age about obscure legalities and wins. 

“You wouldn’t hurt a fly,” Shishupal spits, “you’re too much of a coward to hit a person when they know it’s coming. That’s why you’re just stabbing us in the back, selling us out on the first day when we put our reputations on the line to back you for President.” 

“Shisupal!” Vrikodara roars, Dhananjaya striding to stand next to him, Suyodhana and Radheya on either flank despite what is rumored to be their own tensions with Pandu’s sons. The family is closing ranks at this attack from one their own, it seems, but then what is University politics if not a way for people to find some entertainment from other people’s drama. 

“What,” Shishupal retorts, “you expect us all to shut up while you commit to sinking half of the budget into that wastrel’s pathetic fund? You plan on just giving our money away to anyone who spins a sad life story and begs for cash?” 

Well, University politics is about this too -- the eternal question of which students should be helped, and how much. The fund in question is the brainchild of Shyam, a way for individuals to apply for rapid monetary relief in response to uncontrollable circumstances, and be granted what they need with almost no questions asked. 

“Shisupal,” Dhananjaya steps forward, sensitive as always when his best (and only) friend’s name is brought up. “We’ve let you get away with more than we should because you happen to be our mother’s nephew. If you continue to embarrass us in public it won’t end well.” Shishupal laughs. “For you or for me? As far as I can see, you’ve all been duped by that street-trash pretending to be Vasudev Yadav’s son.” 

Dhananjaya glares. “Uncle Vasudev is more our mother’s brother than your mother is her sister. Slander his name at your own risk.” Again, Shishupal refuses to cower despite what the crowd acknowledges as fierce odds -- Dhananjaya doesn’t actually attend the University, only visits frequently from the Indian Air Force Academy to spend time with Shyam, and his brothers sometimes as well. The man is licensed to shoot a gun, for god’s sake, but Shishupal continues to stand firm. 

“Even now, you’re all standing in front of him,” Shishupal taunts, “Dancing to his tune and protecting his reputation when you know as well as I where he came from. He didn’t even speak English until he left that shithole after killing his own uncle, and you idiots are planning to sink my money into his scheme? Not on my watch.” 

“No,” a voice comes from the back of the group on the dais, “there’s no need to make that face. I can fight my own battles, Dhananjaya. Especially against an absolute clown, like Shishupal.”  

“A clown,” Shishupal shouts, “you’re calling me a clown?” 

Shyam rolls his eyes, having pushed his way to the front. Behind him Vrikodara is grinding his teeth, Dhananjaya’s fingers hovering at his own waist as if wishing for a gun. 

“Well I could have called you a motherfucker,” Shyam shrugs, “but I’m quite fond of your mother. In fact, she was the one who’s begged me to forgive you every time you’ve done something like this.” 

Shishupal snarls. “My mother doesn’t beg, street-trash, and she certainly wouldn’t lower herself to beg from you. People like you are only demanded from.” 

Shyam shrugs again. “Suit yourself. But consider this your last warning -- say another word, and I won’t let you go like I did before.” 

“Before? Before?” For some reason, Shyam’s threat has only made Shishupal angrier, face turning purple where it was red. “Before, as in that time last year, when you stole my wife from the wedding hall at gunpoint. Is that what you mean by before?” 

The crowd goes still at the reminder of the biggest controversy to rock their collective social circle. 

Shyam raises an eyebrow. “The whole point of that was that she wasn’t your wife when we left.” His lip curls in a sneer of his own, eyes suddenly cold. “You were treating her so poorly that she asked what to her was a complete stranger to kidnap her on her wedding day. I wouldn’t talk so loudly about before.” 

Nearly a year ago, Shishupal was to be married to Rukmini Bhoja after years of forcing her to stand attendance at his side during all campus events, despite her not actually being enrolled as a student. Both of their families were rich, well connected, and sought increased prestige through connection with the other. It was, people remarked, on paper the perfect match. 

Of course, Rukmini was intelligent, witty, kind, and one of the most beautiful women most people had ever seen. Shishupal passed classes off of sheer intimidation, threw rocks at the college cats, and supplemented these qualities with his insistence on growing a patchy, horrible, beard and kept his oily, stringy hair long. Worse, there were rumors that Shishupal was even meaner drunk than he was sober, and that once Rukmini had been seen walking away from him clutching her arm and had returned with a scarf wrapped around her shoulders to cover where otherwise might have been a visible pattern of bruises. 

The wedding, everyone had agreed, was to be a tragedy, and would only serve to make Shishupal even more insufferable. When the nightly news had aired the extraordinary report of a young woman staging her own kidnapping, apparently begging one of the groom’s family connections to attend her wedding and hold a gun to her head as they walked out, it was widely agreed to be answer to their prayers, and above all a job very well done by the erstwhile bride to be. When it was revealed that the “kidnapper” was Shyam, well, that just made the whole thing even funnier. 

When classes restarted, Shishupal prowled with a whole new look -- clean-shaven, and short hair. Rukmini Bhoja was noticeably absent from campus events, but a few months in Shyam had been seen getting off the bus at the station near campus and kissing someone who looked just like Rukmini goodbye. 

It seems the rumors about that last bit had found Shishupal too. “Stranger,” he scoffs. “Is that what we’re calling it these days?” 

Shyam’s entire body, always loose, always slightly in motion, goes completely stiff. More than Dhananjaya, more than Vrikodara, it is Shyam who now suddenly looks like an apex predator. The crowd, not even the one facing Shyam directly, finds itself taking a step back. 

“What exactly is it that we’re calling,” Shyam asks softly -- sound only heard because it’s being picked up by the microphone on the podium awaiting the rest of Dharamraj’s long-forgotten speech. 

Shishupal rolls his eyes, sneering. “I’m glad that bitch made such a spectacle of herself when calling off the wedding. I wouldn’t have wanted to marry a whore, you know. Why take seven rounds to get something she sells, no?” He smirks, as the entire group on the dais -- the whole horrible writhing mass of Kurus and their assorted friends and family -- advance as one. “Or, I guess she was the one who was buying,” Shishupal laughs, looking at Shyam who appears to be frozen in place, his face a perfect picture of overwhelming rage. “She paid you to take her, didn’t she? Poor bitch didn’t even think you’d fuck her for fr--” 

“SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU SON OF A BITCH!” 

Shishupal’s eyes immediately roll up into his skull, as a result of Shyam Yadav’s fist colliding with Shishupal’s jaw. No one bothers to catch the body. 

Silence reigns for entire minutes as everyone watches Shishupal, crumpled on the ground. Watches Shyam Yadav, standing over him wild-eyed, with his right hand still in a fist.

“Oh Alexa,” a gentle female voice calls out from the crowd. Everyone turns to stare, open-mouthed, at Rukmini Bhoja standing in the front row, absolutely grinning at this turn of events. She gazes back at them, turning towards Shyam again and laughs. “Alexa this is so sad. Play ‘Mmm Whatcha Say.” 

[multmilk]

Addiction | w.yh

Pairing: Bestfriend!Lucas x Reader

Warnings: Use and mention of alcohol and cigarettes, mention of strippers (lol), angst & making out. Also suicide (mentioned not in a descriptive way but if you feel uncomfortable please do not read this. Do not risk your mental health for this, I love you!)

Word count: 2.5k

---

Blue lights strobed around the room and loud music was playing, making the people dance wildly.

Lucas was sat in between two strippers with a glass of whiskey in his hand. He wasn’t even sure why he was watching these dancers perform for him when he could easily just watch you.

The two of you were inseparable, wherever you went he did too. There was just no way he would leave your side. Lucas always guided you throughout your poor life decisions—boys, cigars and liquor. He felt the need to always keep you safe and he doesn’t care if he gets in trouble in the process too. Another factor was that he was in love you.

He loved you ever since you saved him from whores living in his home that tried to consume and corrupt him. He loves the way you talk about the universe and your passion. He loves the warmth and gentleness your being brings to his soul. With you, he feels like the world just consists of you and him. Your eyes that could pierce his soul—oh how he loves getting sucked into them every time.

You were irrational and overly-sensitive when making decisions and Lucas was all there to straighten them out. He makes sure that when you drink and smoke, you don’t push your limit. He makes sure no boys could hurt or take advantage of you and he did all of those because he loved you.

You were currently dancing against Mark Lee and boy was he blushing. You looked gorgeous wearing a green silk slip dress that Lucas bought you. It’s been a month since you’ve been partying non-stop which deeply concerned Lucas but he couldn’t stop you, you were too stubborn for your own good.

As soon as the song ended, you strutted towards Lucas, eyes narrowing as you spotted the strippers he was sandwiched in between, at this Lucas chuckles. He signaled the erotic dancers to leave as soon as you seated on his lap, burying your head on the crook of his neck.

“Lucas,” you breathed. The way you said his name sent shivers down his spine. Just as he was about to reply with a cheeky remark, he felt tears on his neck. You were crying and lightly shaking.

“What’s wrong?” he gently pulled your head back to face him, his eyes searching for yours. Your eyes screamed of sadness and exhaustion, university really was taking a toll on you. You lay there in his arms feeling secure and like tomorrow would be better. For a second, you actually believe that everything will be okay. You’ll graduate with flying colors, you’re going to have your dream job, you and Lucas would still keep your friendship and you’d finally be able to commit into a serious relationship.

You had serious commitment issues, all product of your parent’s divorce (though it was better seeing them apart rather than them tearing and clawing at each other every minute) and your past boyfriend.

After your last relationship ended way back in 2018, you started getting addicted to boys. You slept with people then left them hanging. You toyed with their emotions and you felt powerful. It all was wrong until you met Wong Yukhei.  He led you towards the right path, he helped you realize and fix your mistakes. He shaped you into becoming a better person. You saw the light in him.

You needed a distraction away from the nagging thoughts inside your head, away from the demons living inside of you. You would not let yourself be destroyed by your own guilt and regrets, so you opted to drink and smoke your night away.

Lucas tried to get you to quit your unhealthy habit but you insisted that it was the only thing keeping you sane so he agreed. He was a great company, sometimes he’d even drink with you but never too much. You didn’t know why he was so afraid to let loose around you, it’s not like you haven’t seen him drunk before.

Anyways, as you calmed yourself, Lucas combed your hair and smiled at you. His smile was to die for, it probably was your favorite thing about him. His lips were so plump and soft—you thought about how it would feel against your own. You thought about his teeth biting down on your lip, his tongue playing dominance with yours. You weren’t even going to deny that you found your best friend attractive, I mean, who wouldn’t say he was right?

“Come with me to the restroom,” you suggested. He raised his eyebrows at you and you hit his shoulder lightly, giggling. You grabbed his hand and the two of you walking towards the girl’s restroom. You peaked inside the comfort room to see if there was anyone, seeing as you two would be alone you pulled Lucas inside with you. He stared at you with big and wild eyes, his lip was quivering as well. You laughed and put your hands on his neck.

“Y/N…” he trailed off. “Stop this. What even are you doing?” “Kiss me,” you said. His hands that were gripping once on your waist quickly retracted, you groaned at the loss of contact.

“Don’t you want me, Lucas?” his big eyes stared at yours like he was looking for something. “I do want you Y/N but this just seems way out of line. Did you drink too much? Do you want to go home?” then you kissed him. You kissed him again but pulled away once he didn’t kiss back. “Y/N, we can’t,” he stated firmly. “I just need to feel loved. Please, Lucas. Just this once,” for a moment, you felt like crying because of embarrassment. You humiliated yourself in front of your best fucking friend and on top of that, you probably scarred your most treasured friendship. fuck.

You felt his soft lips on yours, it felt like heaven, he felt like heaven. Lucas put his hands on your waist and yours on his hair, tugging lightly to which he moaned at. You were the one to pull away so that you could both catch your breath. “Just this once,” Lucas breathed and then pulled you to kiss him again.

Just this once quickly turned into days then into weeks ‘til you were fucked and it went on for months. Nothing much changed except that Lucas had fallen deeper in love with you, if that were even possible. The two of you pretty much fucked everywhere—after classes in the mathematics classroom, on his bed, on your couch, outside your porch, inside his bathroom, literally everywhere. You weren’t complaining because you knew you both wanted it.

Having sex with Lucas changed you though. You went to your classes feeling livelier than the day before, you finished the day looking forward to the next, you felt lighter. You weren’t the only one changing though, Lucas went to his classes more late than usual, he had eye bags weighing like tons of rocks and his hair disheveled albeit him convincing himself that he was happy.

He held you at night like he hasn’t before, the two of you were intimate and he was sure of that. He got to worship and appreciate your body and treat you like a queen. He had everything he could ever ask for so why was he so what was his problem? He thought about it for days and he knew why his feelings were a mess. It occurred to him that you may just be toying with him, maybe he was just another knot on your belt but he refused to believe that.

He tried his best to believe that you truly loved him. That your heart would beat the same as his when you two cuddled at night, but as longer the two of you fucked and lacked romance and passion, he was deeply convinced that you didn’t feel the same way about him. To feel at peace he asked you to meet him and he planned on confronting you.

---

You looked gorgeous and you knew it. You had a big smile on your face, you were ecstatic to tell Lucas about your day but your smiled dropped once you saw Lucas’ eyes. It was full of sorrow, it reminded you of what your eyes once were.

“I’m tired of this,” he simply says. Lucas doesn’t look at you. “Then you should rest,” “I’m tired of us, Y/N,” he stated again. You felt a pang in your heart, you weren’t quite sure why.

“Let’s stop then,” you replied back and took a step forward towards him. “It’s not easy to break what we have, you and I both know that,” “Then let’s go take a break. We can do that,”

He huffed and clenched his fists. He fucking huffed at you, what the hell was his problem? “Are you going through something? Are you okay? Because what the fuck Lucas”, you continued, “You do not invite me over just so you could clench and fucking get piss-“ “I love you,” he cut you off then he looked at you.

Ah, and there it was. His eyes he was trying so hard to hide. His eyes that held the truth and the affection. He loves you and you want to run away—so you did. You ran as far as you can, not caring that you were almost hit by multiple vehicles. You shouted and cried, you questioned why He has to be so cruel. Why he makes your best friend fall in love with you.

You didn’t deserve Lucas and you know it. You corrupted him enough already and this? Him falling in love with you, him wanting to have you as his forever? Everything made you feel mad. Next thing you know, you were out partying again. Lucas hasn’t called nor texted, he didn’t try to stop you when you ran away ‘He probably expected that already’ you thought.

It’s been exactly 4 months since Lucas confessed and you running away like a coward.

You had thought over and over about what you should do. Why you want to fix things, why you ran away, why you wanted him back. You were scared to try but you were willing to try. You loved him back so you approached him at lunch break.

He was sat with Mark and Donghyuck, they patted him on the back when they saw you approach.

“Hey, can we talk?” your hands were trembling. He took one look at you and he caved in. Truth be told, he didn’t want to speak with you. Both of you were hurt and he was just in the process of moving on from it. “Okay,” then you two walk outside.

---

“Lucas, I’m sorry,” when he didn’t respond you continued. “I’m sorry for running away that night. I know I shouldn’t have but I can’t take it back so I’m sorry,” you hear him sigh. “I-I want to try. I want to try to be in a relationship with you,” you see him wince at the word ‘try’ “Why?” he finally speaks. “Because I love you too, Lucas,” and then he shakes his head in disbelief. “You say you love me, it took you four months to realize that? Did all the partying and sex the past three months tire you, hm?” he was angry but you let him continue “W-why do you love me Y/N?” your eyes started to well. You weren’t sure how to answer him, you could tell him all the things you love about him and what makes him so lovable but you too weren’t sure why. “I was afraid of commitments. Scratch that, I still am. Wanting to try with you means I really love you, don’t I? Doesn’t that count for something? And you love me too,” you were crying now.

“So you love me because I love you,” it wasn’t a question, it was more of a statement but you nodded nonetheless. “You can’t love me just because I love you. You were addicted to me Y/N, hell you may still be!” his words were hurting you, it was making your heart ache. “You stopped drinking and smoking when we started fucking. You know why that happened Y/N?” a few students were looking at the two of you but Lucas didn’t seem fazed. “I was your drug. You used me to distract you and then you got scared because I actually had real feelings for you and you ran away because you were scared—and I understand that. But, you returning here just because what? You hurt me and you feel bad? You come back because you know that I would accept you again?” Lucas had started to cry too.

“You cannot love me just because I love you. It’s not fair,” he exhales, “I need to be with someone who truly loves me. I cannot settle for less, because that’s what I deserve,” he finally breathes.

For the first time, you felt happy. You know he didn’t deserve to be with someone as fucked up as you are and you were glad he made the decision not to. He leaves you there alone in the middle of the hallway, crying but you felt joy.

Wong Yukhei, your favorite drug. Everyone gets addicted to something , don’t they? Turns out that yours was your best friend and even if him leaving left a huge hole in your heart, to which you know couldn’t be filled again, you were happy he would stay away from you.

Maybe in another life you could be the person he deserved. You could be the person he would want to be with. Maybe in another life.

And with that, you closed your eyes as you felt blood leave your body and your vision became blurry. The last thing you saw was Lucas carrying you outside of your building and he was crying. He was trying so hard to keep you alive but you knew—you knew he was too late. You put your hands on his cheek and whispered, “I love you, Wong Yukhei. You will always have my heart. I love,” you were cut off as soon as you took your last breath. Lucas held you in his arms like he did back at the club when you wore that green silk slip dress.

date posted: apr 27 2020

[romewritingshop]

Wake up Parker! Chapter Fourteen: Rivals know better

Relationship: Peter Parker x Tall Older Reader (Peter is 22 and Reader is 26/27)

Warnings: Acknowledging feelings

Word Count Total: 1878 (This Chapter)

Tagged: @bggerbtch @technicallykawaiisoul

Summary: Peter Parker is a student in the city of Brooklyn. He’s lazy, spoilt and he procrastinates a lot. He meets a woman named (Y/N), She’s recently moved to Brooklyn for an independent life. Something Peter is fascinated by. Over the course of a few months, Peter needs to realise that he has to grow up and become responsible for his life.

WAKE UP PARKER! MASTERLIST

“Moving to a new place isn’t easy, but once you take the first step of saying: “Yes you can!” It gets easier. Trust me on this.”

(Y/N) tapped her fingers against the metal table, eyes darting between the paper in Clint’s hand and his facial expression. After three days, she was finally able to finish the article. She was anxious for Clint’s reaction, hoping that if it was enough to impress him, it would impress Mr. Barnes. Clint put down the paper and took a look at his friend. She straightened her posture and adjusted her black jumper.

“Well?”

Clint held up a finger and finished off his quinoa salad, taking a sip of his water and turned to (Y/N) with a bright smile.

“I think it’s great. It’s clear and I feel your personality from your words. It’s powerful. Why are you not a writer?”

(Y/N) smiles before she slaps Clint’s arm.

“Did you have to make me wait for your praise?”

Clint rubbed his arm.

“Yeah! I had to get some food in me before I could vocally express my admiration.”

She gave a nod and spotted Mr. Barnes from across the room, talking to Steve.

“Do you think Mr. Barnes will like it?”

“He’d have to be an asshole not to like it. You should go show him now.”

(Y/N) gave a nod and stood up with purpose. Clutching to the single sheet article and walking away from the break room towards Mr. Barnes. He finishes his conversation with Steve and spots (Y/N) heading towards him. Just the person he needed.

“(Y/N)! Good, can you get me my coffee and then I need to see you in my office to start the layout plan for the fashion section?”

(Y/N) gave a nod and followed Mr. Barnes to his office, trying to get his attention. He stopped in front of his office door and glanced back at (Y/N), seeing she had a paper in her hand.

“Mr. Barnes, I wrote this article and wanted your feedback, if you get a moment.”

“(Y/N) can I please get my coffee?”

She gave a nod and Mr. Barnes went into his office and closed the door. Surely he was busy and he’s always grumpy without coffee. She took a deep breath and went back to the break room to get Mr. Barnes some coffee.

Meanwhile, Peter was at home lazing around again. Three days and he hasn’t seen the outside world. Peter went to the kitchen and took a hard look at the eggs in the fridge. His worst enemy as he picked an egg up and examined the shape. He could never understand why it was so difficult to crack an egg but he did not want to risk a mess. This time he would go out and eat. He quickly got dressed into a Rick and Morty print t-shirt and dark jeans, grabbing his rucksack and the house keys to head out to a restaurant. 

The fresh air was doing Peter wonders and he was regretting staying indoors. Looking at the various sized buildings, he spotted a small restaurant. The logo was a man in a white apron tossing a pizza and smiling. Peter rolled his eyes at the obnoxious logo but was intrigued to go in, pushing the door and slipping into the place. He felt like he had been transported into Italy as he looked around at the stone and wooden designs. A man standing by the host podium, comes around it and smiles at Peter.

“Hello! My name is Luis and I’m your host for today. We have a table over there so if you’d like to take a seat and then we’ll come around to take your order.”

Peter gave a nod and followed Luis’s direction to a small single table, taking a seat and flipping through a menu to see what’s to eat. As he looked at the menu, he noticed groups of people laughing and smiling. Peter felt a little lonely as he thought back to his college friends and the time he shouted at them. He shook his head and called a waiter over to give his order. Half an hour later, Peter ate a whole pizza and some garlic knots. He was content with the food and the waiter came to take his credit card.

“Guys! Don't worry. This is my treat, I'll pay.”

Peter raised an eyebrow at the familiar voice and turned towards the window to see Wanda and some girls with her. Shit! Wanda! She seems to have noticed him as her smile falters and Peter turns away, fascinated by the salt shaker on his table. A waiter comes back to him and holds a small black wallet to Peter.

“Sir, your card has been declined.”

Peter’s eyes widened as he took a look at the card and double checked with the waiter. He gave a solemn nod and Peter put the card away. Shuffling through his wallet and realising he doesn’t have any cash to pay for his meal. He was about to apologise when Wanda came over with her purse.

“That's ok. I'll pay for him.”

Peter was surprised his worst enemy was offering to pay for his meal. Peter felt bad as he turned to Wanda.

“Wanda, that's really sweet of you. Thank you so much. I'll pay you back.”

“Peter it's okay. Save the ‘I’m grateful’ speech for another time. It doesn't suit you.” The waiter took her payment and walked off to the cash counter. “Anyways, I just got a job so I'm treating all my friends to lunch.”

Peter smiled as he pointed out the obvious.

“Not exactly friends, are we?”

“No. Not exactly. I'm sorry that you failed, Peter. Just wanted to say that.”

There was the old Wanda as she gave him pity. There was one thing Peter wanted to know as he called out to Wanda.

“Hey Wanda, why do you hate me so much?”

She stopped and turned to glance at Peter, the events running clear through her memory.

“Three years ago, I came to Brookly to join our college. I had the right grades, but I was late with my application. I was in the admin office, having an interview with the head of Economics. She got a phone call from a ‘Tony Stark’. Told me to wait outside and I heard her talk to Mr. Stark about you. I almost didn’t get my place because you took my seat, Peter. 

“The admin officer called me in and said that they couldn’t take in anymore students and that I’d have to try again next year. I was lucky that the week before college was meant to start, someone dropped out of the course and I got their place. I’m smarter, I work harder, and I'm more deserving than you. But life has always been easier for you, hasn't it? Think about that carefully, Peter.”

Wanda walked off to her group of friends as Peter took a moment to let her words sink in. She was right, she was more deserving than him but being Mr. Stark’s son has its perks. Mr. Stark really did his best to offer Peter the best of life and Peter was too much of a brat to see that.

After the lunch, Peter decided to head back to (Y/N)’s apartment to lament over Wanda’s words. He trudged up the stairs and spotted the last person he thought he’d see. Michelle. She was standing by the front door with a big black bag of things as Peter frowned. He shoved a hand into his pocket and pulled (Y/N)’s house keys. Pushing them into the lock and opening the door and letting Michelle into the house. Tossing the house keys on top of the drawer on the left of him and dropping his rucksack on the dining table.

“Michelle, what are you doing here?”

“I came to ask you to go home. Mrs. Stark is worried about you.”

Peter felt anger rise in him as he was reminded about the night he left and the moment when his friends passed and he didn’t. He didn’t want to go back and prove Mr. Stark was right about the fact that Peter was useless and lazy. Never amounting to anything successful as Peter sat on the dining table with his arms crossed and his gaze away from Michelle’s face. She closed the front door and stood a meter away from Peter as he refused.

“No.”

“But Pete, you have to go home some time!”

“He cancelled my credit card, Michelle. There's no way I'm going back now.”

“But he's just angry, Pete. Just like you. The both of you messed up. You need to understand from his side.”

Peter did not need ‘Graduate’ Michelle Jones telling him what to do. He brought his head with eyes blaring.

“You're the one who doesn't understand, Michelle! You topped the whole damn college. How can you know what it feels like to have failed? Just leave me alone!”

Michelle felt her anger flare up. Every single time Michelle has always excused Peter’s bratty behaviour but this time he had gone too far. Way too far and assumed that she had no feelings.

“Fuck off Peter! I don't know what it feels like to fail? I fail every time I go home and see my dad praise my brother for getting an ‘A’ in his maths test. When it comes to me he says: ‘You got 95% on your economics exam, Michelle! You can do better than that.’ You’re lucky your dad pushes you to do the best and that he cares about you!

This is the first time in my life I have succeeded through my hard work. I have to work twice as hard to get half of what you get Peter. You're not the only one with problems, so stop being a jerk! If you really want to know, I didn’t get the internship with Quentin Beck. Something my dad expected.”

Michelle heaved heavily as she watched Peter’s face, his mouth gawping like a fish. Peter had sensed that Michelle and her dad had tension but he hadn’t realised that it was because her dad couldn’t care about his daughter’s success. Peter felt really stupid as Michelle glared at him. He closed his mouth and rubbed the back of his neck.

“I’m. I’m sorry Michelle.”

“It’s fine. I got a better job offer at the Xavier institute.”

“I know I'm being a jerk.”

Michelle smiled and reached into her rucksack and pulled out an orange coloured file, handing it to Peter. Peter flicked through the file, listening to Michelle’s words.

“You are a jerk but it’s okay. You do know you can always try again. That's why I got this for you. College application form and some of your things.” She offered the black bag and Peter went through it. “I knew you wouldn't go back home. Just thought I'd try.”

“Thanks.”

Michelle smiled as she watched Peter pick out all his games and magazines before picking out his camera. Examining it and smiling as he realised he could take photos again.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN: THE BREAKING POINT

[statticscribbles]

Magnets

Summary: Fangs/Jughead Request: Fangs and Jughead like each other but wont do anything about it so Toni Archie and Sweet Pea decided to push them together

Fangs shifts on the bar stool and Sweet Pea internally groans. Toni smirks holding out a glass for Fangs, she watches his hand shake as he grabs it. “Fangs how many times do we have to tell you, the rest of the Serpent’s will not think you’re trying to suck up to him.” Toni assures hm. “Suck him off maybe but-“ “Sweet Pea!” Toni smacks him on the back of the head and Fangs bites back a laugh. “Seriously everyone knows the fastest way to Jone’s heart is through the bottomless pit of a stomach. Just buy him a couple days worth of Pop’s and he’ll be all over you; or under whichever- got it, no sex jokes about our two friends.” Toni glares and him and even Joaquin appears narrowing his eyes. “Fangs, you’re welcome by the way.” Is all Joaquin says before focusing on getting his usual drink from Toni. “For what?” “Five minutes.” Joaquin smirks over the rim of his glass.

“Fangs!” Fangs turns slightly frantic when Jughead shouts for him. “What did you tell him?” “That you had questions about the Serpent laws.” Joaquin nods and Fangs looks over to where Jughead stands. “Pop’s; I’m starved.” Fang’s is about to get his bike from where he chained it but Jughead waves him towards his. “It’s faster, hold on.” Fangs obeys, trying not to think about how right it feels riding behind Jughead. “Joaquin said you have some questions about the Serpent laws.” ‘Well-“ “Calm down, I know he was bullshitting me, however, Sweet Pea let it slip earlier that your mom’s not doing well.” “Yeah she’s still sick and-“

“We take care of our own Fangs. Your mom included, now; what’s going on?” “It’s fine, really she-“ Fangs swallows at the glare Jughead gives him. “Don’t lie to me Fogarty.” “Stage four, terminal. Lung and Liver. She’s up in Centerville right now, we can’t pay for the next round we-“ “Hey, whoa, Fangs, Fangs shh, it’s alright.” Fang’s isn’t sure what happened but suddenly Jughead’s sitting nest to him wrapping him in his arms and his Serpent jacket.

“I had no idea it was that bad. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Fangs just shakes his head, trying not to cry. He’s known what it was since middle school; he knows she won’t see him graduate; he’s made as much peace as he can with it. “Jesus Fangs, it’s okay not to be okay with that. Christ.” Fangs pales as he realizes he said that out loud. “Can we just drop it; please.” Jughead nods but doesn’t move from the spot next to Fangs and they eat in silence. —————————————————————————————–

“So that sort of worked? I mean they’re talking more so-“ Sweet Pea elbows Joaquin in the side. “Christ that hurt.” “That was the point.” Sweet Pea hisses as Fangs walks in. “How was detention then?” Toni laughs when Fangs scowls. “The only reason he gave it to me was cause he thought I was mouthing off to him; I swear I was coughing!” “You got detention?” Jughead hovers by the bar and Fangs shrugs. “It’s nothing.”

“Like lunch last week was nothing?” Fangs swallows, he still won’t talk about what happened and Sweet Pea has twenty on it being about his mother. “King wants to see you.” Jughead nods to Fangs who cringes as FP steps towards him. Fangs follows both him and Jughead into one of the back rooms. “Okay so-“ “MOM!” Fangs shoves past them hugging his mother who sits in one of the chairs, wrapped in blankets.

“Mom, what’re you doing here? Are you okay? I love you. I’m sorry I didn’t visit it’s just so far out to Centerville and-“ “Hush.” She runs her hands through his hair for a moment before FP coughs and Fangs turns back to him. “We managed to secure pain medication, and health checks with the doctors at Riverdale hospital, so there wasn’t a need for her to be all the way up in Centerville; they’re sending her files down today.” “Thank you FP.” He smiles shaking his head. “Jughead organized all this; he thought it would be a good early birthday present. We’ll still have a party on Saturday though, if you want.” Fangs nods watching Jughead’s face pink as he smiles. ——————————————————————————–

“Seriously the plan’s perfect! We just have to like slip a magnet into Fang’s pocket and then get Jughead to spin, or vice versa!” “Sweet Pea that sounds ridiculous, how do we know they’ll even want to play spin the bottle; we all know each other, I don’t think any of us want to risk kissing you.” ‘I’ll have you know I’ve never kissed anyone.” “We know, it’s why no one wants to kiss you, you’d be awful at it.” Archie ducks before Sweet Pea can hit him. “Hey Fangs we were planning a round of spin the bottle for your party.” “How do you plan spin the bottle?” Jughead turns to them. Toni smirks. “Well you have the option to pass, but each pass you have to take of a piece of clothing.” “So either we kiss each other or we see each other naked?” Jughead arches an eyebrow; Archie scowls. ‘Well it sounds dumb when you say it like that.” “No it sounds interesting, we can also take bets on who chooses to kiss the most, and then who ends up naked first.” Jughead beams and Toni laughs nodding. ———————————————————————

“What’s that?” Joaquin asks as Jughead shoves something into his pocket. “Magnet.” “Are you, our wise and good Serpent leader, going to cheat?” Joaquin laughs and stumbles as Jughead shoves him. “Awww can out fearless leader not ask out his crush? Poor little snake, he won’t bite, unless you’re into that.” Joaquin winks laughing when Jughead shoves him into the wall. “Oh comeon Jones , you know he’s been saving himself for you!” Jughead freezes turning to Joaquin. “He what?” “You heard me didn’t you? Enjoy the party, loosen up a bit.”

Fangs isn’t sure if he should be happy or not when Toni slipped a magnet into his pocket, he pretended not to notice, assuming whatever outcome they wanted he could always take his jacket off instead of going through with it. He watches the bottle spinning around and around, he’s already regretting spinning it so hard as it seems to be taking forever to slow. As it finally starts to Fangs keeps his eyes trained on the bottle refusing to look up until Toni nudges him. “Oh. Um; okay-“ Fangs nods awkwardly andSweet Pea shoves him towards the closet. “Go on. Unless you decide not to.” The other person offers no disagreement and Fangs can feel as they step into the closet, shoving the spare jackets aside. “Hey Fangs.” He refuses to acknowledge how weak at the knees he feels. “Hey Jones.” The stay silent for a moment and its when they hear the chair scraping towards the closet door do they understand.

“Fuck them. This is so stupid, I told them not to mess with anything and they threw themselves into it, stupid fucking magnet.” “You got one of those too then?” Jughead half jokes. “Yeah, Toni slipped it in my pocket. I guess you know all about the crush I have on you too right?” “Well I do now, assuming you know about my crush on you.” “Well I do now.” Fangs can’t help but smile. “How much do you want to bet Sweet Pea’s sitting in that chair?” “Why?” Jughead smirks. “I bet we can make him leave it.” Fangs raises an eyebrow but nods. Jughead’s in front of him. Pulling his face in to kiss him; he can feel Jughead’s arm snaking around his waist, walking him backwards until Fangs is against the door.

Jughead pulls back slightly winking and Fangs smirks knowingly. They stay broken apart for a moment, hearing Sweet Pea shifting in the chair. “You sure you up for this?” Jughead mumbles into Fang’s ear. “Course, serves him right for putting this on.” Jughead can’t help but laugh when Fang’s steps forward before letting himself fall against the door. “Okay so now all you have to do is moan a bit and they’ll totally think-“Jughead’s cut off when Fangs fakes a moan; jughead can’t help how pink his face goes. They both stumble, tripping and falling as the door flies open FP standing looking unimpressed. “Listen the Wyrm may not be the classiest joint but I’m not having my son fucking in the closet, go home and do that if you want. Hello Fangs.” “Hey FP.” “Enjoying yourself?” “I was.” He laughs as FP glares.

Support My Writing?

[therainroguefanfiction]

🎃 Frightful October Act VIII, #24 ~ Jane the Ripper (Denki Kaminari)

📑 Table of Contents

Genre: Angst, Dark, Fluff, Romance

Word Count: 1,888

Pairing: Slight Yandere/Female Reader x Kaminari

World: Boku no Hero Academia

WARNING: This fic contains depictions of gore and male mutilation. Read at your own risk.

Can I just say how proud I feel to have written this fic with 1,888 words exactly? If you didn’t know, the Jack the Ripper killings took place in the year 1888 and, clearly, this fic was heavily inspired by him. It wasn’t planned and I did not edit this fic to be at that length, it was that length when I finished the fic and popped it into wordcounter and it’s fucking brilliant.

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

Jane the Ripper.

Considered a villain by some and a hero by others, Jane exacts revenge against men that cheat on their significant others. If she finds a man that has cheated, she will judge them by stabbing them through the chest to trap them, cut off their ring finger, castrate them, and then drive a dagger through their heart. Since she cropped up three years ago, the rate at which men cheat has drastically reduced, but there are still those that must be judged, must be punished.

And Jane won’t rest until every single pig has been slain.

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

You were a student of U.A.’s prestigious hero course, part of class 1-A. To your peers, you were a nice person, if not a bit reserved, but no one hated you, not even Bakugo. The truth was that you had no interest in being a pro hero. You came to U.A. for one reason – to watch over your boyfriend, Denki Kaminari. It’s not that you didn’t trust him. You did, to a degree, but it was impossible for you to fully trust anyone. That fact that he was a super flirt didn’t help your trust issues, either.

“Hey, Kaminari, you wanna join us for a milkshake?” Ashido asked, her voice full of excitement. She motioned towards the door where Uraraka, Midoriya, Jirou, and Iida stood, waiting patiently while she gathered more people.

“Sure, sounds fun!” his cheerful expression toward her really pissed you off. He turned his beautiful yellow eyes to meet yours. “You’re coming, too, right, Y/N?”

You hid your anger behind a bright smile. “I’d love to.” ‘Only so I can keep an eye on that bitch.’

Mina Ashido had no interest in your boyfriend, she was just a cheerful, outgoing person, but you didn’t care. Interested in him or not, she shouldn’t be getting so close to someone that belonged to you.

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

It was just after midnight, the full moon bathing the town with a bright, almost ethereal light. The quiet night was broken by a masculine scream, echoing through the streets. Dogs started to bark loudly, trying to alert their owners to something very wrong.

A middle-aged man ran down an alleyway, breathing heavy as his sneakers pounded the pavement. He was terrified, crying out for someone to save him, but all of the pro heroes were too busy elsewhere, just as planned. There was no one around to save him.

Laughter echoed around him as a blur of black rushed overhead, stopping to kneel a few feet before him. He screamed, stumbling back onto his butt. You stood up tall, cape billowing around you in the chilly autumn wind. A wide grin split your face, red eyes glowing from behind a masquerade mask.

“Kian Onizuka, you have been judged,” you took slow, deliberate steps forward, sliding a knife from your sleeve and into the palm of your left hand.

“W-W-Wait, Jane!” The man scrambled back across the pavement, holding his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t cheat on my wife, I swear! We didn’t do anything!”

“The punishment for infidelity… is death!” you threw the blade, propelling it forward with your telekinesis. It slammed into the center of his chest, the force knocking the wind from him as he fell back flat against the cement. The blade cut clean through his body, digging into the cement before two hooks sprung out from the tip, securing it in place.

The man screamed, his hands flying to the hilt. He tried to pull it out, but the spikes prevented any movement.

You chuckled darkly at his futile attempts, a blade falling into your right hand. You kneeled down beside him, your free hand gently rubbing his stomach before moving toward his crotch. He stopped struggling, eyes locking with yours as you slowly unbuttoned his jeans. His breath was coming out in small clouds and you could see his penis starting to enlarge, pushing against the fabric.

Your lips curled up in disgust. “This turns you on, you filthy pig?” You grabbed his dick tightly, squeezing it tightly. He yelped in pain, trying to pull your hand away. You cackled and, with one clean slice, you cut his dick from his body. He screamed, body thrashing wildly as blood splurted from the room.

“May you suffer for eternity in hell,” you snarled, grabbing the hilt of the first blade and tugging it up, the spikes demolishing his insides and piercing his heart in the process. You picked up his hand and sliced through his ring finger.

He coughed up blood, gasping for air, but his body stilled, the life fading from his eyes.

You dipped your white gloves into his blood, writing a warning for all to see on the wall beside his corpse. With another disgusting look, you turned on your heel and disappeared into the night.

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

“Did you see the news last night? Jane the Ripper claimed another victim!” Ashido announced as she slammed her lunch tray onto the table.

Sero shuddered, holding himself. “I can’t believe a villain goes around castrating men.”

“This chick clearly can’t get any!” Bakugo laughed loudly before stuffing his face.

You glared down at your lunch, stuffing a spoonful of rice into your mouth to keep yourself from speaking your mind. ‘Those damn fools. I am cleansing this world of filth for them. They should be grateful.‘

“She only attacks men that have cheated on their partners,” Jirou added before smirking. “Kaminari is the only one in danger at this table.”

Your head snapped up, eyes narrowed at her. Did she know something that you didn’t?

Denki scowled at her. “What kind of person do you take me for? I would never cheat on Y/N!”

“I bet you know all about such things, don’t you, Y/N?” Monoma approached the table with a smirk. You snapped your angry gaze to him but held your tongue. This only made his smirk grow.

“What are you talking about?” Ashido asked.

“Oh, Y/N didn’t tell you?” he clicked his tongue, his eyes never leaving yours. “Y/N’s dad was a man-whore that slept with anything that had a pulse. His wife was so ignorant, it took her years to figure it out, and when she finally did -” he made a slicing motion with his finger. “She castrated him while their five-year-old child watched. Poor thing, ne, Y/N~”

‘How does this bastard know all that?!’ your eyes were wide, fists clenched so tightly that your nails broke the skin. The table was dead silent, everyone’s eyes on your shaking form. The silverware began to shake violently as you stood up, eyes flashing. “That fucking bastard got what he deserved. He cheated on her for years without remorse, even in our home! All men are fucking pigs that deserve to be punished for their sins! Jane the Ripper is my hero!”

Gasps and murmurs broke out across the cafeteria, eyes following you as you stalked out of the room, surrounded by floating cutlery. You had worked so damn hard to keep your secret hidden, to hide the dark past in which you suffered on a daily basis. You tried so fucking hard and that bastard ruined it with just a few words. Your hands fisted into fists.

‘No man can be trusted.’

You left the school that day, skipping the rest of your classes. Denki had a bad feeling settling in his gut. How could he have known you for so long without knowing how much anger, how much hatred you harbored toward men? Why didn’t he recognize your pain, your cries for help?

He felt like a failure as your boyfriend.

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

Denki stood outside your apartment door, his hand hovering over the doorknob. Swallowing his nerves, he pushed the door open and slipped inside. You were sitting on the couch, cleaning an assortment of knives and daggers.

You didn’t bother looking up.

“You’re not coming back to U.A. are you?” he asked, softly, hovering in the doorway.

“Nope.”

“Why?”

Your eyes slid to meet his, softening a bit. “You know why, Denki.”

He took a shaky breath. “You… you’re Jane the Ripper.”

You smiled, holding up the blade to the light as you inspected it. “That’s correct.”

“You hate men.”

“No,” you pursed your lips. “I don’t trust men.”

“But you trust me…” he stepped closer, his eyes pleading with you. “Don’t you?”

You placed the knife on the table and approached him. You expected his body to tense up, for fear to shine in his eyes, but you only saw pain and love. You rested your hand on his cheek, which he covered with his own. “No matter what happened, you’ve always been by my side. Do you… hate me?”

“I could never hate you, Y/N! I just… it hurts,” his hand tightening around yours as tears sprung to his eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me? About your parents, about what you were feeling? I could have -”

“Saved me?” you raised a brow with a bitter smile. “Afraid not, my love. You’re going to be an amazing hero someday, Denki,” you tried to pull your hand away but he refused to release his grip.

“Don’t leave me,” he whispered, free hand grasping at your hip. “I had everything planned out for us. Getting married after graduation, buying a house, having kids… I can’t picture that with anyone else!”

Your heart seized painfully and you lowered your head. Your entire life, people looked down on you for what your mother had done. They looked at you with pity. You couldn’t remember a time when you didn’t feel like a monster. No one ever showed you love or treated you like a human being until the day you met Denki. He was an angel that you didn’t deserve.

He moved his hand from your hip to lift your chin, his lips claiming yours in a kiss full of love and passion. You could feel the desires of his heart and it made you feel more guilty than you already did.

You tugged yourself away from him, turning your back. “Go be a hero, Denki. Forget about me, you can do better.”

“I’m not leaving you,” his words were firm.

You scowled at him. “A hero can’t date a villain.”

“You can still be a hero!”

You scoffed, sitting on the side of the table with your elbows on your knees. “Do you even know how many men I’ve killed? I’m not just a villain, I’m a serial killer. There is no hope for me anymore.”

“It’s never too late to change!” he kneeled down in front of you, taking your hands into his. “Please… promise me you won’t kill anyone else. Focus on me and only me. I will never betray you, Y/N.”

You could see the sincerity in his eyes.

Denki reached up, wiping away the tears from your eyes before they could slide down your cheeks. He pressed a chaste kiss on your forehead before bringing you into his arms and holding you against his warm chest. You gripped his waist tightly, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart.

“Denki?”

“Yes, love?”

“You’re the only man I’ve ever trusted. I… I’ll do whatever you tell me to do.”

His grip tightened as he rested his head against yours. “I won’t fail you, Y/N.”

───── ⋆⋅🎃⋅⋆ ─────

[screensirenfic]

Gasoline Chapter 9 - Slightly NSFW

Part me would like to say that I went home after that. That once we’d come down from our hormone high; I got back up and dressed, before leaving like nothing ever happened.

It would’ve been the decent thing to do; perhaps even the right thing, but it wasn’t what I did.

Instead I continued to lie with Billy, exchanging open mouthed kisses and whispered tokens of affection that would leave me blushing when I went to bed at night.

We had sex later on, and some wretched part of me wishes I could say that I regretted it, but I didn’t.

I savoured every moment trapped beneath Billy’s form; each sharp hiss, each broken gasp as he clinged to my hands like lifelines, fingers tightly entwined with his own.

He finished in me again, and I probably should be thinking about birth control; having gotten incredibly lucky the first time, and really beginning to push my luck on the second.

Billy should’ve asked; really, but I don’t think he was in the right frame of mind to be thinking where he pumped his load.

I’d forgive him, and then I’d go to the pharmacy, because graduating pregnant was not a look I was aiming for.

Now that high had finally grounded, I was pulling on my clothes in front of a half dressed Billy, already wondering what the hell I was gonna tell Steve when he picked me up tonight.

It wasn’t gonna be easy; that was sure.

I mean; what was I meant to say to him?! Steve; I’m sorry, I fucked someone else, and I think I may love him; oh and by the way, the guy I fucking fucked was Billy Hargrove!!

No matter what I said, he was gonna be fucking destroyed, and I really don’t know what I could do to make it better.

“What are you thinking about?”

Billy’s broke the wordless silence of the past twenty minutes with what could’ve a simple question; his bright blue eyes looking up at me from the bed telling me it was far from one.

“Nothing.” I replied, focussing on pulling on my shirt to avoid looking at his melancholic face.

He’d been looking at me like that the entire time, and really maybe I should be asking what he was thinking; the lines of his mouth far too hard for it to be anything but deep and difficult.

Perhaps I didn’t want to know; whatever was going on beneath those pretty blonde curls being far too gargantuan for me to consider right now.

“You really gotta go?” He asked, changing the subject to one no less difficult, but twice as pining.

“Yeah; I already have plans tonight.” I confirmed, pulling on the first of my motorcycle boots.

I really did feel guilty right now; more so because Billy knew.

He knew he couldn’t have me; knew I was off the market, but still I teased him with something he couldn’t have.

I used him then walked away, just like all the other girls in school; like all the people in his life who saw him as a piece of meat to fuck or fuck up.

“I wish you didn’t have to leave...” Billy confessed; his voice painfully vulnerable once more and I felt my heart clench for him.

I took a breath, trying to find words of comfort, but they’d all be empty.

I was going to leave him, just like everyone who he cared about did, and I couldn’t bring myself to lie to him like that.

Instead I sighed, pulling on my last boot, because seeing him like this again; so downhearted and broken, was making me feel sick.

I picked up my rucksack, shouldering it, and Billy got to his feet, and for a moment I thought he was gonna ask me to stay again; to be here and be his.

Instead he walked me to the door; soft eyes lowered to the floor as I kept pace, telling myself repeatedly why this was the right thing to do; why I couldn’t possibly stay here with Billy.

He opened the door, hand deceptively steady as he continued to avoid looking at me; blue eyes flickering from side to side, chasing thoughts only he could see.

“I guess- I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” I asked; my farewell coming out as a question, because I really didn’t know what to expect with Billy, or if he was even planning on coming back to school at all.

He didn’t say anything, and I bit my lip, guessing my suspicions were closer to the truth than I would’ve liked.

I didn’t want Billy to disappear. I didn’t want this to be the last time I saw his pretty face, but I knew the look of a flight risk when I saw one, and Billy’s eyes had that longing of another place that I knew all too well.

Billy would be gone this time tomorrow.

Him and that baby blue Camaro a hazy sweet memory in Hawkins town; a runaway James Dean in faded denim, a slowly fading legend of Hawkins High.

But to me he wouldn’t.

He was something real and tangible, and god; I’d miss him! I’d miss those pretty blue eyes, and that ladykiller smile, and I just wish there was something I could say to change his mind; to take that wanderlust out of his eye.

“Almost forgot...” I remembered, unzipping my backpack to dig around inside, pulling out the soft golden form of the teddy bear.

“I thought you might want this back...” I said, attempting to hang him the slightly squashed bear.

“Keep it. I got it for you.” He refused, gently pushing it back into my hands.

“Billy; I can’t-“

“Keep it. Please.” He insisted; words firm and meaningful as he placed the bear back in my hands, clamping his fingers over my own in a gesture that spoke more of intimacy than force.

He let go of my hands, moving them away gently as my fingers remained clutched in the teddy’s soft fur; eyes glued on the deep baby blues staring down at me with so much deep seated emotion.

“Then at least take this...” I continued to negotiate, unlatching the necklace from the bear’s neck and attempting to give it to him.

“No; it’s yours I wanted you to have it.” He pressed, wrapping my fingers back round the thin gold chain, keeping the necklace tightly clasped in my palm.

The weight of his token wasn’t wasted on me; the intention of his choice striking me hard in the chest.

“Billy; I don’t know what to say...” I admitted, and it truly was rare that words failed me.

I just couldn’t get my head around why Billy would give me something that meant so much to him; that was such an undeniable part of him.

“Don’t say anything... just wear it for me.”

He asked, and I know I should’ve said no; that I was Steve’s girl, and I really shouldn’t be wearing jewellery belonging to other guys, but I didn’t.

I let Billy step forward, invading into my personal space once more as he plucked the necklace from my loosely clenched hand, holding it in reverent fingertips.

“Can I?” He asked permission; holding the spread necklace in front of me, as if I only needed to accept it, and everything would be okay.

I nodded and his hands moved behind my neck, gently fastening the clasp so it didn’t tangle in my hair, but still he lingered.

To my surprise, he ducked his head down low, planting a soft deliberate kiss on the top of my head; one that conveyed more of a sense of longing than any of the times we’ve had sex previously.

I savoured it, memorising the soft touch of his lips; the warm scent of cigarettes, spearmint and a little too much cologne.

If this was Billy’s way of saying goodbye, I wanted to remember every last detail.

He pulled back too soon, and my body chased his warmth, but he never pulled back completely.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna stay?” He asked for the third time, eyes staring directly into my own, so there would be no chance for deception; no chance for lies.

“I wish I could...” I confessed, and it was the truth.

I didn’t want to be yet another one that left him; another nameless face in a horde of disappointments.

Billy stared at me, fingers gently tracing the chain along my collarbones as his eyes searched my face for a hint of a lie; his mind not allowing his heart to believe that someone could feel for him just as strongly as he did for them.

I stared back, once again allowing myself to get lost in those deep baby blues; every fibre of my being telling me to just give in and stay with him, that this was what I’d wanted all along.

Instead I leaned in close, planting a firm, heartfelt kiss on his mouth, knowing that I probably shouldn’t; but I couldn’t bring myself to walk away without tasting his lips once more.

Billy didn’t push back, just accepted it with mournful resignation; the fact that we couldn’t be together putting another cloud in his already greying sky.

I walked away then; a cold feeling of regret mixed with plain sadness melding in my stomach in a way that made my boots feel like concrete blocks, each step away from his house harder than the last.

I wanted to turn back, to run back inside his house and kiss him like crazy; to kiss away every bruise and every scar from the past ten years and make him feel good again.

It wasn’t enough to just bring him happiness for a moment; I wanted him to be happy always, to be happy with me.

I turned back, but Billy had already shut the front door, and shut me out again.

I’d missed my chance, and now I had to go and apologise to Steve, because it wasn’t gonna work.

Even if Billy took to the road tomorrow and never turned back; it wasn’t gonna work.

Some part of me would always be with him, riding shotgun in that Camaro whilst his fingers traced circles on my thighs.