#but when i tell you i am making the content i want to see i mean that shit
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I am back from Moana 2. Spoiler free initial thoughts:
While I don't think it was as bad as I thought it would be it also was not what I would call good? It was okay. I think the setup/lore is not very well thought out and it just expects us to accept a lot of it cuz things are happening. They really needed to spend more time worldbuilding. The songs aren't as memorable, but there were one or two that I think are solid. I think there are too many characters and literally Moana's crew is just a copy and paste of Buzz Lightyear's crew from Lightyear. Just as I predicted.
You could really tell though that this was meant to be a series. The narrative flow of it was not as smooth for a movie and I can break up each part as if it was "ah and now this is an episode and this is an episode." At some point I also felt like 'this feels like a video game level and I am meeting an NPC that just directs me to the next section.' So that wasn't great. I'm ngl there were some parts where I was bored or felt like it dragged on too long.
But what we ARE eating GOOD though is all that DELICIOUS Moana and Maui content. Their relationship and interactions are so sweet and when they're reunited again it's literally like seeing two puzzle pieces fit back together and they are well oiled machine. They worked so well together that it kind of makes painfully obvious that we didn't really need the other characters at all. Seeing them and their maturing dynamic was worth it alone.
Overall it was. Okay. I am still kind of nervous where they plan to take this franchise now cuz it's clear they want to do more. And why wouldn't they, Moana is probably the only few things keeping Disney afloat from their mediocrity streak. Did this break the streak? I can't really say it did, but it wasn't a bad time. Not like Wish or Frozen 2 was a bad time. But the possibility of seeing more Moana and Maui adventures is still a bit exciting.
7/10.
#my cousin said I was being very generous#I was gonna rate it a 6/10#but Moana and Maui really carried that movie so for them alone I will give them an extra point#I'LL TELL YOU WHAT THOUGH#the little extra Moana gets at the end is peak i can't believe we manifested that#moana 2#moana
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kerosene (part 2) // ellie williams
*・゜゚・* summary: the one where she breaks up with cat.
*・゜゚・* pairing: jackson!ellie x reader
*・゜゚・* content: sfw
*・゜゚・* length: 0.8k
this is part two of this series! find part one here
I AM ENJOYING WRITING THIS SO MUCH i literally don't want them to get together because i just love yearning so much sighhh. i'm already up to the part where things finally happen and i know i'm gonna end up posting those, then going back and writing little extra parts to slot in where they're still friends. anywayyy hope you enjoy <3
something about the conversation makes ellie deliberate for weeks. it was the way you’d spoken about your relationship just not feeling ‘right’, the way she couldn’t really verbalize anything she felt like she should say about cat. she doesn’t know if she’s just overthinking everything. cat’s great. sure, she can’t see herself spending the rest of her life with her, but she makes her happy. they have fun. they have things in common. she feels like she starts to make a mental list of all the reasons they’re together, analyzing the relationship, analyzing her own feelings. she can’t shake the notion that now they’re settled in, the excitement of newness gone, she, too, feels like something isn’t ‘right’.
she hopes it just goes away on its own. but when just over a month passes and nothing has changed, she knows she has to just do it.
it starts off as a regular day; she meets cat at a spot they frequent, stomach churning at the anticipation. she wants to just rip the band-aid off, but she can’t. the words won’t come out. she flounders around for a while, talking about nothing, knowing full well cat can tell something’s up. finally, when she straight up asks her why she’s being weird, she just comes out and says it. she wants to break up.
of course, she feels awful. cat’s confused, and crying, and asking all kind of questions ellie can’t really express any answers to. she’s upset about it, too. but she just knows in her heart it’s for the better.
it’s cemented when she’s walking back home, realizing she feels a little lighter.
she sees you properly again about a week later, when there’s an event in jackson. she really wasn’t planning on going, not wanting to risk seeing cat (not wanting to have to interact with anyone, pretty much), but dina had convinced her, saying she ‘can’t lock herself away forever.’
she walks in late, party already in full swing, and immediately spots you in the corner chatting to jesse. you haven’t actually spoken in a few weeks, just a greeting when you saw each other out and about, but you seem happier than you were before. she kicks herself mentally when she finds herself hoping it’s not because you’ve found someone new.
she awkwardly hovers around, getting herself a drink and sipping it, people watching. these things were never her idea of a great time.
after about ten minutes, dina appears at her side, visibly tipsy. “what the hell are you doing?” she asks playfully, gesturing at the room full of people. “you’re a single woman now, c’mon. get out there.”
ellie pulls a face, rolling her eyes and taking a sip of her drink. “yeah, that's definitely my style.”
dina lets out a short, exasperated sigh, taking ellie by the wrist and tugging her across the room, towards you and jesse. “at least socialize. you’re all… weird. more than usual.”
“oh, shut up,” she retorts lowly, but allows herself to be hauled over to the two of you. her stomach flutters slightly when she gets a proper look at you; you’re a little more done-up than normal, eyes sparkling in the warm light as you greet her.
she doesn’t know if it’s the alcohol or something else, but that night is the first time things start to feel explicitly different. on one hand, it’s similar to how it was before — the odd pleasantness dissipated in the air. it feels more like a real friendship again, rather than two people dancing around each other. but on the other, something just feels… new.
she actually ends up having a really good time. she spends the majority of the night with you, drinking more than you both probably should, conversation flowing easily. and when it’s over, she insists on walking you home, despite you saying dina’s staying the night and you weren’t going to be alone anyway.
she just shrugs and smiles.
on the short walk back, dina’s chatting your ear off, thoroughly drunk, but you can’t really focus on anything she’s saying. not just because of the fuzzy feeling in your head, but because of the way you’re so, so aware of ellie’s presence. you’re walking in between them, noticing the way she seems to gravitate towards you, swaying away slightly, then back in. you cross your arms, not wanting to accidentally brush against her, not really understanding why.
she lingers at the door when you get home, dina heading straight in and kicking her shoes off, flopping down on your couch.
“well… thanks. you’re free to go,” you joke after a small pause.
ellie shoots a lopsided smile, leaning against the doorframe. “welcome.” she pauses, like she doesn’t want to go, like she wants to say something. but she doesn’t. she just taps the doorframe and stands up straight. “see you later.”
dina yells out a ‘bye, ellie’, and you wave goodbye as she turns around to leave, trying not to think about the way that smile sent your stomach all funny. “get home safe. update me on the hangover.”
she looks over her shoulder at you as she walks away, chuckling. “will do.”
you go to close the door, watching her stuff her hands into her pockets and make her way down the street for a moment too long.
#tlou#tlou2#ellie williams#ellie tlou#ellie williams fluff#ellie x reader#ellie x you#ellie williams x reader#ellie williams x you#ellie williams tlou2#wlw fic#lesbian fic#my writing#livvieloveswomen#seraphicsentences#lvlymicha#sapphicarribean#chappellroankisser#lil-elliesgf
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hi hi! can i request oneshot ⁿˢᶠʷ top barbatos x GN!reader please? i want to read what will he do when he got jealous to make sure the world knows mc are his. also please include *cough* tailsex.
thanks in advance 💐
Your wish is my command ★ Enjoy!
Summary: During a big event another demon gets a little too close to you for Barbatos' liking so he decides to show you exactly who you belong to.
Contains: NSFW
GN!reader x Barbatos
Warnings: 18+ content, tailsex
Masterlist
You're mine
You were one of the guests in the big event that was held at the Demon lord's castle. Of course the whole House of Lamentation were invited as well as Purgatory hall and many other noble families from the among the whole Devildom. All guests barely fit in the huge ball room of the castle.
Barbatos was walking around in an elegant suit with a silver tray in hand, carefully balancing a few drinks on it and offering it to the guests with mannered words and elegance. He was radiating prestige.
At times he'd find himself at Diavolo's side, carefully observing the guest the prince was talking to, making sure to keep him safe and at other times he'd find himself looking over the guests in the room just to lock his eyes on you and make sure you were behaving. You were wearing a bit too revealing clothes for the butler's liking and he felt the need to watch over you and any other demons even if all they did offer a swift glance your way.
Meanwhile you were having the time of your life. Walking around with the beautiful outfit which was chosen for you by the fifth-born, explaining the way it looked and a glass of high-end demonus in hand. You had the main attention in the hall. Stealing glances from all the demons around you, accompanied by many jealous stares by the lovers of said demons.
Suddenly a man approached you. He was a tall and handsome demon. Everyone was all over him. Though his appearance wasn't left unnoticed by Barbatos. He furrowed his brows and observed the demon carefully. A pang of jealousy gnawed at his heart but he was fast to push it away. As the conversation with the demon progressed Barbatos became more envious. The demon had his hand resting on your lower back while you two were talking and laughing. 'You seem like the perfect couple. But that won't do.' Barbatos thought.
He excused himself away from lord Diavolo and left the tray with drinks on one of the tables before making his way to you. And right when the demon was about to grasp your chin, in an attempt to bring you closer and steal a kiss Barbatos yanked his hand away, holding it with a strength even he himself didn't know he had. At first the demon was annoyed but upon seeing Barbatos' angry face he backed away with a pale face and fear in his eyes. Barbatos shoved him even farther away and took a few slow steps towards you.
-"MC what were you doing with him...?" –He hissed.
-"We were just having a regular conversation, Barbatos! No need to get jealous over it."
-"A regular conversation, you say?" –Barbatos murmurs and pushes you against the nearest wall, leaning in closer. You shiver.
-"If it was a 'regular conversation' as you put it.. why was his hand hoovering over your lower back.. why were you two laughing so casually.. why was he about to kiss you just now?" –He speaks in a low, dangerous voice while trapping you more firmly against the wall.
-"I.. well.."
-"You're speechless because you know what I said is true, aren't you?"
-"I uhm..." – You stutter once more, unsure of what to say. You see the fire in his eyes become more powerful and the grip on your hips tightens.
-"MC, tell me. Who do you belong to, hm?" –He asks and when you don't answer he pushes you further into the wall, leaning in, lips hoovering just above your ear.
-"So? Are you going to answer or am I going to have to force the answer out of those pretty lips of yours and show you who you actually belong to hm?" –Without waiting for your answer the demon teleports both of you to his room, immediately pushing you towards the nearest surface.
-"Clothes off, MC. Clock's ticking." –The demon takes a few steps back, admiring you as you slowly dispose of your clothes. That's when you noticed his form change. His tail had come out along with that demonic aura demons gave off when they were in their demon form. You know Barbatos wasn't playing games this time.
He reached for a chair and pulled it forward, sitting on it and crossing his legs while his fingers were working on loosening his suit and bow tie. When all of your clothes were away from your body, revealing your naked form to the demon he smirked, the fire in his eyes burning with unknown passion.
-"Crawl to me." –He speaks in a dangerous tone that makes shivers run down your spine but you nod and slowly make your way to him on your hands and knees just as he had requested. You looked like a puppy aching to feel the feeling of closeness upon nearing its owner. Such a desperate sensation. But that was exactly what the butler wanted you to feel. He wanted you to know your exact place and where you belonged.
When you neared him he wrapped his long, slick tail around your waist and yanked you over to him, positioning you over his already hardened member that was bulging against his pants. He crashed his lips to yours in a dominant kiss, tongues fighting for dominance though you were no match for him. He was a demon after all. And no other but Barbatos, the master of time himself.
Soon enough he stood up and moved you both to the nearest wall. The cold surface of the stone bricks cooled your burning body down which made you take a sharp breath which wasn't left unnoticed and earned you a soft chuckle. And then you felt something against your entrance.. the sharp tip of his slick tail, teasing your hole, bringing you to a point where you wanted to beg for him to push it in. Your body was squirming and you were struggling and the thing is that Barbatos knew that. He was very aware of that fact and wanted it to be that way. And then when you thought you finally reached a peak he pushed it in, making you squeak in pleasure. The demon smirked and began pumping his tail in and out - as far as it could go, hitting all the right places inside you every single time. But just as when you were about to hit the point of sweet release he pulled out and never pushed it back in. You whined in disappointment which earned you an almost sadistic chuckle.
-"How bad do you want it?" –His demonic voice echoed through the room.
-"I want it soo bad, Barbatos, please.." –You pleaded but he shook his head.
-"You aren't going to get anything before you tell me exactly what I want to hear.. so.. go on MC.. tell me.. who owns you, hm?"
-"You, Barbatos."
-"Who is the only one who can make you feel this way?"
-"You, Barbatos."
-"And do you know what all of these things make you, MC? They make you mine. Not anyone else's... Mine.. and only mine." –He says as he unzips his trousers and pushes his demon cock inside you, making you see stars. You could feel each and every vein of it as it stretched you wide. And soon enough you found your release. Moaning and begging while milking Barbatos' dick. But he wasn't done. Instead of stopping he went faster, searching his own release. The intensity was so powerful that it could make you scream out of pleasure and then the demon released his thick load inside you, marking you as his.
-"You're mine, MC. You've always been mine... And you'll always be."
#obey me shall we date#obey me!#obeymeswd#obey me#obey me headcanons#obey me fanfic#obey me fic#obey me hcs#obey me! shall we date?#obey me fandom#obey me writing#obey me otome#obmswd#obey me smut#obey me barbatos#obey me barbatos x reader#obey me gn!reader#obey me brothers#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me leviathan#obey me satan#obey me asmodeus#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor#obey me demon brothers#obey me barbatos smut
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☁️Invisible| George Clarke
Summary: you have a crush on George, but you don't believe you're good enough for him, little do you know you're just his type.
It wasn't unusual that you were the last person someone picked, whether it be for a teams in games or dates; you were the black sheep. You were outgoing, a bubbly person but was shy at the same time. You'd recently joined content creating and started on TikTok, expanding your taste palette for new ideas you came across a guy name George, he posted funny skits and impression videos, although you weren't the type to do those things, his content inspired you to create something new. You decide to follow him.
You post a haul of your shopping trip to b&m, showing your followers the new things and dupes along the way, you were an eye for bargains and anything similar to the expensive price tags. Racking just over 70,000 followers in just a short few months you were invited to a pr event with White Fox. A brand that you'd never personally purchased from but you did love their products, you accepted through your management and agreed to vlog/promote the brand at the event.
You were so excited, your first Pr opportunity. Tears form in your eyes from joy as you make a video "hey guys i have some exciting news! I've just been invited to my first pr event with White Fox, I'm going to vlog my whole experience and break it down for you guys along the way, I'm so grateful to be able to have these opportunities thanks to you guys watching!" You say with beams of happiness as you sign off the video and upload it.The event was 3 days away so you had time to prepare. You placed your phone on charge whilst you did the laundry, a time you like to take off social media and block out the outside world, although it's your job.
After your small detox you open up your phone, lots of TikTok notifications flooding through with congratulations when two stood out to you.
@georgeclarkeey liked your video
@georgeclarkeey started following you
Your eyes widened in shock, a creator you took inspiration from had followed you, you wasn't sure why all your content being girly related but non the less you were buzzing. You responded to a few comments on your video for a while as you sipped on an iced coffee, when a message popped on your phone.
@georgeclarkeey: "hey sorry for the random message, I saw your video about your pr event and I just wanted to firstly congratulate you on it, you're doing really well! Also I am aswell invited to the event, wonder if you'd like to meet there? Don't want it to come across weird haha"
Your mouth ran dry, a sense of shock and excitement overboard your body, how could someone like George Clarke want to meet me you thought, you were never people like George's cup of tea, the lonely kid in school who'd eat alone and now a big creator asks to meet you. You hesitate to reply incase you make a fool of yourself, strumming the confidence to reply.
You: hi! aw thanks for that, I appreciate it! It's been a shock to the system to say the least haha, I'd love to meet up, I'd know nobody there apart from my management so you'd do me a solid!"
You smile into your phone like a schoolgirl with her first crush, George was undeniable attractive he had a big girl following and everyone went crazy for him. You were quite fond of him yourself to say the least. @georgeclarkeey: "no problem at all, it's always a shock when you get your first but honestly the only way from here is up, would you like to meet at the event or beforehand? A coffee or something?"
You: "a coffee sounds great, let me know where and I'll be there, thanks for being so kind"
@georgeclarkeey: "perfect! I'll text you a coffee shop closer to the event so we won't have far to walk afterwards also it's my pleasure! Nice to see some other varieties of content surfacing, your contents lovely to watch"
Shut the front door. THE George Clarke telling you your contents lovely to watch? You're kidding. The world seems fake right now, so many emotions rushing through you.
You: "Thankyou George, it means a lot, I've took a lot of inspiration from your videos to try and open my confidence up a little, so you could say your contents helped me in ways to boost my career"
You continue to chat, getting to know eachother.
-
Day of the White fox Event
Your nerves were setting in, your first event meeting new people and also meeting up with George. You opted for a some casual clothes, baggy mom jeans and a white crop top with a flannel shirt over the top. Your makeup as basic as normal, a touch of brow gel, a pop of mascara and some skin tint. Nothing major. You make your way into London to meet George, he'd text you the address beforehand, a 2 second walk from the venue. Your hair cascaded over your shoulders as the London breeze hit your skin, a mix of crisp and warm air. Just as you get to the coffee shop your stomach sinks, what if he doesn't like me? Thinks I'm weird? The battles of your overthinking brain looms and looms as you step in, there he was, blue eyed and handsome.
His eyes shoot up as you walk through the door, a warm smile makes it way over his face "hey, glad you could make it" he says arising from his seat to hug you, a mixture of mint and aftershave flooded your nostrils as you embraced him for a hug "I wouldn't have missed it for the world, how are you?" You reply sitting down "ah I'm good, busy but good, yourself?" He replies "same really, not so much as busy as you probably but yeah, I'm excited" you smile, his gaze wandering down to your lips as you spoke as shivers tingle down your spine. You talk over coffee for a while before heading to the venue.
"You ready?" He says with a warm smile opening the door for you "I think so" you chuckle nervously "you'll be fine, don't worry I'm here if you need anything" he says with a reassuring tone which wrapped around you like a warm blanket of safety. You give your names to the people at the desk and collect your lanyards, you pull out your phone to introduce your video.
"Hi guys, I've just arrived and the nerves are kicking in, I'll try to film as much as I can for you all, trying to sink into the reality of it all along the way and make new friends which I seem to have-" you were interrupted by George poking his head in "she's already made one friend, well should I say I practically befriended her" he chuckles placing a hand on your shoulder as he walks to grab a drink. You put your phone away, saving the footage, George Clarke in your video would be a big shock to your fanbase for sure.
The night goes on and you meet new creators, have interviews with some labels and tell everyone on how you got into influencing, the night couldn't have gone much better; George was there to reassure you when you felt nervous and just guide you through the whole experience which you were thankful for. There was an after party, but you opted not to go.
"Leaving so soon?" George asking raising a brow, "yeah sorry, parties aren't really my thing, Thankyou for tonight George I appreciate it a lot" you say smiling "we could go grab a drink elsewhere if you wanted, just me and you?" He says, you were taken a back by his response that he wanted to leave the event, to be with you, in a strange turn of events you'd never imagine something like this would happen, you weren't up to beauty standards nor were you a model, why did he want to go for a drink with you? "You don't have to, I wouldn't pull you away from your friends" you reply "you're not, you're my friend and I want to have a drink with you" his sweet smile returns, a gaze of sincerity plastered over him like a genuine interest in you loomed inside him "okay, maybe just a quiet one" you say as he nodded, you said bye to everyone and left, scoping out a bar to indulge in.
You chatted for a while at the bar, like you'd known eachother a life time and not just a few days, you got on like a house on fire, taking in eachothers interests. It's like no matter what you said, did or how you acted George would always match your energy and it comforted you. After a while you call it a night, it was getting late. You walk out the bar as you book an Uber home
"I've really enjoyed today, Thankyou" you say with a soft smile "me too, normally I hate pr just because of the social interaction, but you've made it easy to bare" he says laughing "well atleast I could be of some use" you retort, silence looms over you as George stares at you for a little longer than normal "can I kiss you?" He says nervously, your eyes widen "really?" You say shocked "is that okay?" He says "yeah-just nobody's ever wanted to kiss me" you say nervously "why not, you're really pretty, funny and easy to get a long with" he says brushing his hand against yours, with a soft smile as he cups your chin and places a soft kiss onto your lips, a magnetic shock goes through you like it was something you had longed for a while, a connection that felt so right. You pulled away and stared at eachother for a minute as you sink in the reality of what had just happened. You exchange numbers and arrange to meet up again, turns out your worrying was for nothing, you were just his type.
-
🫶🏻
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Three days had passed and Harry hadn't left your tiny apartment.
He kept saying he should probably leave, and you insisted there were things you had to do, but neither of you actually made it past the threshold of your door. No one said goodbye, or even bothered to shrug back into clothes. For three days, you ate, drank, and slept with Harry.
"You're making it hard to leave," he murmured, his voice low and content as you placed tiny kisses on his neck, his collarbone, his jaw, anywhere you could reach, really. It was how you used to wake Harry up when you were together, and when morning number four rolled around, you couldn't help yourself but lean across the bed and kiss his soft, sun kissed skin.
At first, you kept up the pretense of being unattached, of sleeping with Harry merely because you knew each other well enough physically. "This doesn't mean we're back together," you'd both whisper, or something to that effect, before blurring the lines of your non relationship once more.
"You're not making it any easier to kick you to the curb," you mumbled, one hand reaching up to caress his stubbly cheek. The fine, short hair that seemed to grow in the last few days.
Harry smelled good, like he usually did with a mix of the soap in your shower. It messed with your head in a way that was dangerous, but you couldn't bring yourself to care.
So he didn't leave (again), and you didn't tell him to go(again). You and Harry stayed in bed for most of the day, only bothering to get up when hunger was too apparent to ignore. You managed to whip something up from the meager groceries you had, not having gone to the market recently, and sat with Harry at the little dining table by the kitchen. The balcony would've been a much nicer spot, as it looked out over the neighborhood square you stayed in, but it was too public, too many keen eyes would've spotted Harry immediately.
"Part of me wishes I hadn't seen you at all," Harry confessed later in the day. You were back in bed after a brief stint in the kitchen where you tried to make pancakes, which promptly turned into kissing and licking pancake batter off Harry as he did the same to you on the kitchen counter, pancakes no longer a priority.
You knew he hadn't meant it to hurt you, but the words sent a pang through your chest, so different from the heat and fireworks and butterflies you usually got from him. Everything was so different now. It was hard to face how much had changed, especially now that Harry was in bed beside you. "I know."
"It's easier to pretend when I can't see you," he said softly, his hand never once stopping as it tracked through your hair, nor did your hand stop tracing patterns in his chest.
"Pretend?"
Harry blew out a large sigh before sitting up in your bed, his arms stretching high above his head. There were hickeys littered all over his body, one on his hip revealing itself as the bedsheet fell and settled just below his waist. You found yourself transfixed by your ex's body, the one you still loved so much the idea of him leaving made your heart hurt.
"Do you still love me?" Harry asked out of the blue.
The question shocked you, but only because you thought the last three days would've made it obvious. You certainly didn't have to ask him how he felt. "Yes."
"That makes it easier too. In a selfish way, I guess," he said, not once meeting your eye. "Knowing you're in as much pain as I am."
Unexpected tears welled in your eyes. You never wanted to hurt Harry. He'd been right to say it was easier to imagine him happy and healthy post break up if you didn't see or hear from him. It was easier to move on if you convinced yourselves that you were better off without each other.
"Harry—"
"I miss you, Y/n," he said, his voice trembling slightly. Harry wouldn't meet your eye, which made all of this so much worse. "I know why we broke up, and I've done everything short of sleeping with someone else to try and move on, but I just—Tell me you're struggling as much as I am. Tell me you don't sleep as well as you used to because I'm not there. Or don't. Tell me this has all just been sex to you so I know there's an end to this—this—"
"Misery?" you finished for him. "I wish I could. I don't know if I'll ever be the same again, honestly."
"Then why—"
"Don't ask why. Please. Not when you know the answer."
It wasn't like you and Harry woke up one day and stopped loving each other. Everything about your relationship had been nothing short of perfect from the very beginning.
Until it wasn't.
"No one has to know this time," Harry said. His tone had taken on a desperate edge, almost making you turn away from him so you wouldn't have to face it, do this all over again. "We can—We can keep this a secret. It'll be just us."
It will never be just us, you thought miserably. "People already know, H."
At the look of confusion on his face, you reached for your phone. You showed him the slew of articles that had already been written. Pictures of you and Harry walking through Rome together three days ago, each one picking you apart or depicting you as the villain in Harry's life.
"I know that's why you're still here. You're waiting for the storm to blow over," you said, unable to meet his eye.
"That's not—After everything I just said, you really think that's why I stayed?" he asked. You'd turned away from him, but you felt his hand on your shoulder, the kiss to your temple as he leaned in close.
"I wish I was the kind of person who didn't care what anyone thought, that I could simply exist in this relationship and not let anyone else in, but—but I'm not. I can't."
"You. Are. Enough," Harry murmured, pressing each word into your skin with a kiss. You closed your eyes, tears leaking from the corners as he curled himself around your body. One leg slid between yours, and you selfishly pulled him closer as he continued to murmur in your ear.
You fell asleep in your ex's arms, the weight of his body on yours more comforting than any blanket. When you woke up, Harry was there, but he wasn't wrapped around you anymore. He sat at the edge of your bed, wearing clothes for the first time since he'd set foot in your apartment.
"You're leaving?" you asked, voice scratchy with sleep.
"I'm supposed to go to Florence tomorrow," Harry said, bent over as he tied his shoes. "I've got a dozen messages on my phone asking where I am."
Something in Harry's voice sounded different, distant, just the way he sounded when you initially ran into him. It pulled at something in your heart, something that you'd been keeping at bay since you invited Harry into your apartment—the knowledge that this would eventually end.
"So you're—You were just going to leave? Without saying anything?"
You heard Harry sigh as he rested his head in his hands. "I thought it would be easier. Our last conversation seemed...final."
"I know, but—"
But what? Harry was right. This wasn't going anywhere. You told him you couldn't be in a relationship with him, and he was responding to that. You knew it was coming, but it didn't hurt any less now that the moment had finally come.
"You're right," you said eventually, sitting up in your bed. "We came here separately, of course you have plans. I'm sorry if I kept you."
"You didn't," Harry reassured. "There's nowhere I wanted to be the last few days, but we... we're broken up, and as much as I want to stay, I don't want to keep giving myself false hope."
Your fingers twitched, itching to reach out, to touch him, hold him. But he was right. As much as you loved this relationship limbo, that was all it was. Stringing you and Harry along would only hurt you more.
"I'm sorry," was all you could say. For too many things, none of which you could bring up without crying.
"Me too," Harry said.
Harry's lean figure appeared a couple minutes later, his head bent and shoulders slightly hunched, avoiding the few photographers who had been waiting for him to leave the building. You wanted him to turn around. You wanted to see his face one last time, a final farewell. But perhaps for his sake, he didn't, and you watched as he retreated down the street and turned down the road out of sight.
Leaning across the bed, he kissed your forehead, then stood up. "One day you'll realize how extraordinary you are, and you wont care how people perceive you," he said, his thumb caressing your cheek. "And then you'll go and make someone the luckiest man in the world by giving yourself over to him completely. I'm just devastated it wasn't me."
You watched him go from the sanctuary of your bed, knowing the second he was out of sight you'd break down completely. The door closed with a soft clock, and even though you knew you shouldn't, you hurried over to your bedroom window, waiting anxiously to get one last glimpse of him.
On your last day in Rome, you found a note he'd written.
Harry had hidden it in one of the pockets of his favorite of your sweaters, though you weren't exactly sure when. It wasn't very long, and the note itself was no more than a scrap of paper, one you'd nearly thrown out by accident. But you would've recognized his handwriting anywhere, and fond memories of notes you used to find among your things kept you from throwing away the folded paper and opening it instead.
Perhaps in another life. Unless you change your mind in this one, H.
#harry styles#harry styles blurb#harry styles angst#harry styles x reader#harry styles fanfic#harry styles oneshot#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x you#harry styles fluff#harry styles writing#harry styles one shot#harry styles fic
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Headcanons for Camellya:
Note: How do I see nothing about her 😭 Nobody writes about her, does nobody want content about her? I’m planning on posting about her more this week, anybody interested at all 😓
SFW:
-A very bit tease. Makes light jokes about how you do certain things but cannot handle other people teasing you. Even if it’s jokingly, she will glare at them and is proabably planning how she’s gonna torture them
-Loves clinging onto you especially when she’s napping. The vines from her body sprout out and wrap around you to keep you close not wanting you to leave. Her head usually pressed up against your chest as you both lay in the sun
-Your house is now filled with different flowers and plants. So many flowers everywhere. Even though there are so many the scent is pleasant like an alluring perfume. She loves it when you help take care of them with her. “How considerate of you, helping me water all of them. I hope you’re as excited as I am waiting for them to bloom…”
-Hates it when you’re out of her sight. She’ll find some way to keep track of where you’re going. In some way absolutely despises all your friends saying that they’re keeping you away from her and that you should get rid of them. Shes also really possessive always having a hand around you in public or clinging onto you. She’s obsessed and hates when you leave her side. “They’re trying to deprive me of the one thing that can make me happy. Oh isn’t it so mean of them…but don’t worry I can make them all poof if you let me”
-Sometimes she gets hurt on purpose because she knows you’ll give her extra attention that day to tend to her injuries. She never gets injuries but she’ll make injuries on herself and dismisses it if other people ask. But with you she’ll be so exaggerative when you ask her about it and you’re the only one that she allows to treat her injuries. She love seeing the worried look on your face as if you actually cared. Usually these injuries are large and bloody. She’ll look at you fondly with a smug smile on her face as you tend to them. “Aren’t you gonna kiss them well? I promise that I’ll feel 100 times better if you kiss it better for me”
NSFW:
-Very expressive and loud. She doesn’t care if others can hear her, she’ll only giggle before getting louder. Will tell you how much she loves what you’re doing and how happy she is. “Oh yes~ you’re so good it’s making me crave more…MORE”
-A massive masochist. Love any and all pain you inflict onto her. The more it hurts the better. Temperature play, whipping, paddles, anything you want. Probably a sadist as well but more enjoys it when you inflict it onto her. She moans so much more every time you cause pain on her body. Will stare at herself in the mirror afterward to admire your work.
-Loves leaving marks on your body especially if it’s any that someone else can see like hickeys on your neck. So so so many claw marks on your back. A lot of the time she draws blood on these marking and will lick the blood away. Loving the metallic taste in her mouth. After sex, she sometimes stares at them with a proud smile. Isn’t too much of a biter but will occasionally nip your neck to catch you off guard. “Oh your even more beautiful like this, I wish to make you bleed my dear~”
-Mirror sex is a huge turn on for her. When you bend her over and slam the strap into her ass. My hand tugging her hair up as she sees herself in the mirror. The saliva slipping down the side of her mouth and how messy you two are entangled together like two vines.
-Aftercare consists a hot bath together and laying in bed. Usually with her laying against her, as she traces the red claw marks on your back as she hums softly. Your hand gently rubbing her back as you reassure her. The smell of her shampoo engulfs your senses as you nuzzle into her neck
#gotta feed the shrimps#wuthering waves x reader#camellya#camellya wuthering waves#camellya wuwa#camellya wuwa x reader#wuthering waves#wuwa
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Adjacent topic, but. One of my favorite things actually is when Alfonse pulls the player aside and is like "Let me think out loud real quick." and when the situation calls for it, "Also what do you think?" Like obviously this happens so much across any game ever, especially ones that have a designated partner character. But it feels so special to me...
Especially with Alfonse, especially when he calls the summoner by name. He didn't used to do that!! In the very beginning!!! And he slips up, as Lif. Trying So hard to take it back. It just feels so personal... 🥲🥺
#i have no greater point here i just like it a lot.#like to me i feel like he has that deep unique bond that the pmd2 partner has w the player#again could just be. two games w a designated partner character. but to me personally how i feel.#like i feel like it's comparable actually esp the way your partner pokemon will pull you aside too#making a point to include you. and also will just talk at you extensively LMFAOO but it's okay 😊💖#but also it just feels SO special and so personal and so rewarding from alfonse in particular.#like this guy did Not want that. he was so scared of that. he's also just one big loss away from feeling like he's lost it all.#one thing about me is that i don't agree. w how he feels about losing friends. i think it's okay. i think it's for the best.#i'm not lonely and sometimes it's a relief. knowing i'll never have to see that person again.#even when there's no hard feelings. even when i geniunely liked that person and they liked me well enough.#i just tell myself it's for the best. they'll move on without me. i'll cherish the memory. i hope they forget me.#but even as i say that it's like. i don't know how true it holds. but i do know it's fine to leave actually.#and i do know i'm not lonely. i've made peace w it a long time ago. i'm content by myself. i keep myself occupied.#meanwhile. i am always obsessing over what alfonse says and what he feels and i feel a DEEP. DEEP SEATED NEED.#to pelt him w rocks. FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU 😤😤😤😤😤😤😤😤#this is why moe exists. the vessel. to pelt him w rocks.#fe alfonse
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I do gotta say tho, even tho I’m mad at aziraphale because he’s being a terrible boyfriend like what you said about the “I forgive you like” because WHAT. But also I really like the way the show really demonstrates the underlying cruelty of heaven and it’s angels. Really shows the hypocrisy of a group of beings who are supposed to do good, especially aziraphale who really buys into the heaven propaganda, who hurts people, particularly the person who means the most to him. Because like you said he fully just takes advantage of that devotion Crowley has for him. Insane, this shwo makes me INSANE
I missed this anon and yeah! The angels were one of my favourite parts of the season, and I think the strongest element aside from Neil Gaiman deciding he's just a simple man who wants to put his otp in situations. They are deeply awful and I kind of love them. They are the exact kind of moralizing hypocrites who are callous and cruel precisely because they think being on team good means everything they do is justified and it's actually impossible for them to be in the wrong (they're angels! is it even possible for them to do the wrong thing?).
but!! To me, they also seem like they're basically kids? Obviously they're not literally children, but there is this very consistent reoccurring joke about how childish/sheltered/immature they are. Muriel is the most obvious example, but the archangels come off like bratty twelve year olds to her sweet little kid.
Gabriel is basically teenager in love flipping off his family as he runs away with his backstreet guy. Uriel is constantly picking at Michael, Michael is playing at being in charge like it's a game, and it's ridiculously easy for both Aziraphale and Crowely to trick them obvious half assed lies. They're not allowed to ask questions! The Metatron treats them like badly behaved kids out past their curfew. At any point an old man with a beard may pop up to scold them and send them home, and they're all scared of doing something wrong by his standards and getting in trouble with this guy who is pointedly not God but who lines up exactly with the pop-culture idea of god the father, and who offers Aziraphale, among other things, a respite from the hard work of figuring out what the right thing to do is for himself. It's fine! You don't have to question the belief system you were born into or make a painful break with everything you've ever known! Aziraphale has had six thousand years on earth to grow up, but the other angels have been sitting in a sterile white box playing "i'm not touching you" games with each other and filing paperwork.
And I think that's extra interesting because this season also really emphasizes:
Heaven has Institutional Problems
Aziraphale isn't the only angel who's unhappy in heaven. Gabriel and Muriel were both completely miserable. They just didn't understand that they were unhappy because they'd never experienced anything else.
Angels who aren't Aziraphale can change and grow! There's very explicitly Gabriel being changed by love and Muriel growing up a bit on earth, and from a more fan-theory angle there's also Jimbriel, who I think is probably basically Gabriel minus the war and six thousand years of playing referee for Michael and Uriel while unleashing an assortment of plague and calamities on earth because that's God's will! Buck up champ.
We also get Gabriel and Beezelebub talking about how their underlings basically live for Armageddon, "if you can call that living." This is so bleak. They've all been on a six thousand year time out just dreaming of the day they get to beat the shit out of each other until they feel better, but it won't work because eternity is just more of the box.
Anyway I think it's going in a distinctly eden adjacent direction. Aziraphale is going to tempt those angels with knowledge and the capacity for change. I have veered so far from your ask anon i'm sorry you're right heaven really went all out on sucking this season & while Crowley and Aziraphale are both fucking it up Crowley refrains from being spectacularly cruel to Aziraphale about it and Aziraphale should learn to return the favour. I forgive you!! I forGIVE you. I forgive YOU. "you can be an angel again" is actually a worse thing to say than "you're a demon. i don't even like you." when he finally picks crowley over heaven i'm going to lose my mind.
#good omens spoilers#good omens season two spoilers#idk it makes me sad that i didn't like the humans very much this season because i think ideally they're central to this whole how to be#a person question i also hope we get to see more of hell next season because i do think they're stuck in basically the same place#with a different aesthetic! and the stick being#thrown into a torture pit instead of thrown into hell#or like. mindwiped and locked in an office for all eternity#gabriel broke my heart which is embarrassing but when he goes from not even understanding what music is to experiencing#the simple pleasure of sharing a song with someone for the very first time and almost immediately hits repeat for eternity... baby. baby bo#i would also like more crowley! this was very much the season of aziraphale#which is fine but i missed him yelling questions at god and the bits where it seemed he really wanted aziraphale's opinion instead of just#wanting aziraphale to develop better opinions#next season had better be crowley wrestles with the universe i am telling you!!!#remember three months ago when i was like eh... another good omens season#i bet it'll be cute but i'm content with my book#i don't go here i said strapping on my clown shoes#seriously though i do think crowley is scared to admit to wanting to be good both because god rejected him and he doesn't want#to be a sucker for her (he is only interested in being a sucker for aziraphale)#and like. chase after something he's barred from and has already been told isn't for him.#and that's why it's so hard for him to admit even to himself that he too would be unhappy ditching earth#in ways that parallel aziraphale's unwillingness to let go of heaven as a source of moral authority and goodness#but the way aziraphale goes oh no! i cannot trust my own judgement and desires. They are suspect!#my judgement is that crowley is good and also funny and sexy. my desires are for his company and also his body#therefore the source of these desires is also maybe bad. i mean he's a demon. he's got to be bad#right??? but no. but i saw him do a good thing. but maybe i didn't? I should probably take a stance on this.#and he makes this crowley's problem until the apocalypse but then the second he gets the chance to cram crowley and his feelings for him#back in a heaven approved box he jumps at it in a way that requires just being WILDLY insensitive and dismissive of crowley's feelings#he's not just being a dick about their relationship he is being a dick about crowley as a person. and he should know better but is choosing#not to because he wants the easy out so badly. anyway i love him he was my favourite character all season no notes#good omens
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#having a creative rut feeling#gonna rant#im basically a giant baby and i don't handle angst very well#and i constantly worry that im just. idk mentally weak or a deeply uninteresting person bc of it.#every big fantasy artist i see is usually very into making sad or angsty pieces and like i wish i was like that#like i fall into this mental hole very very often that im just holding myself back with how many subjects i dont write or draw#but also like when i DO write dark subjects it doesn't make me feel any better??#i dont like feeling sad or angry bc once i am its extremely hard to get back out of it.#and thats scary for me.#but also i want to make art that means something instead of my nonestop slew of smut and feelgood content.#i genuinely feel so trapped by my own emotions and its sp frustrating.#i keep getting told how good for you it is to get the negative feelings out but it never helps when i do it#i just feel. worse? i dont feel good.#i kinda wanna delete the one cloud post bc it just doesn't feel good.#ugh#idk i want to have good intelligent things to say and thoughtful art to make#and everything i make feels soft and cheesey and lame.#not that i find those things lame#but just that it feels like im stuck in baby brain.#when i was a teen i would write horror stories!!! i still love horror!!!#but if i make someone suffer in fic now it feels me with this awful awful overwhelming sense of dread and guilt and i end up so upset#im frustrated at me bc this is such a fucking weird sensitivity to have. im tried of telling myself its okay#bc i WANT to feel mentally free enough to create shit that isnt just uwu soft.#i don't think im making sense but like.#you know#I've literally been bullied out of fandom spaces for only making soft content#multiple times.#so idk maybe this is a learned sense of shame#but i feel like a big over sensitive baby and like I'd be able to do so much more if i wasn't#vent ish
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Okay, no, sorry, I’m still mad about this. “Be critical of the media you consume and examine why you react to it in the way that you do, support marginalized and stigmatized identities.” Yeah, until it’s about mental illness.
A woman (or even man, if he’s deemed over-emotional) makes music about suffering from mental illness and people just go, “What are they complaining about, that’s so immature, hashtag wangst.” (And then, sometimes, inexplicably, if the mentally ill woman gets better and writes happier music, they then talk about how artistically bankrupt she is now and that she should go back to hating herself.) People LOVE cis white pRoBLeMaTiC (straight) fictional men until they are realistically mentally ill, in which case they’re “whiny” and “insufferable” and deserve to die violently, apparently (or, if fandom is merciful, they’re ignored). (And then they celebrate when they DO inevitably get killed off.) “Do your duty and watch [thing I, mc13, personally find insufferable] For The (white) Gays because it has Gays.” Sure, will you watch c4 Pure, the ONLY show specifically about OCD, then? (No, the answer is no, it’s always no.)
I can’t get anyone to watch Doom Patrol. I couldn’t get people (in general-I did convince a few irl friends thank GOD) to watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. One of the most popular and acclaimed shows right now has a character with schizophrenia who was turned into the Big Bad Villain for no fucking reason. One of the most commonly-cited examples of Iconic™ queer media involves a mentally ill man being broken over and over and over again before The Ship™ can reasonably happen. DW introduced a major character who was at one point suffering from mental illness in her past, AND THEN ALL MENTION OF THIS WAS COMPLETELY DROPPED IN THE FUTURE, WITH NO BEARING ON ANYTHING TO THE POINT WHERE I FORGOT IT EVEN EXISTED??!?!? R*tched was a thing that existed despite the Sad Sympathetic Backstory treatment being IN DIRECT CONTRADICTION OF WHAT PURPOSE THIS CHARACTER SERVED IN One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. THEY GAVE. A SAD WOOBIE VILLAIN TREATMENT. TO THE /LITERAL PERSONIFICATION/ OF ABLEISM. THAT IS HER FUNCTION. TO EXIST AS A SYMBOL OF ALL THE WAYS SOCIETY OPPRESSES THE DISABLED AND MENTALLY ILL.
I am!!! Literally!!!!! The only one!!!!!!!!! Complaining about these things!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE ONLY ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one else has said ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one is talking about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m so tired!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#*OBLIGATORY COMMENT ABOUT HOW REPRESENTATION/FICTIONAL DISABILITY IS NOT THE END ALL BE ALL OF ACTIVISM*#*OTHER OBLIGATORY COMMENT ABOUT HOW LIKING '''pRoBLeMaTiC''' CONTENT DOES NOT MAKE YOU A BAD PERSON OR A HORRIFYING ABLEIST*#THIS WAS JUST ME GETTING MAD IT'S NOT THAT DEEP#In the Vents#the real horror was the ableism we found along the way#like. in some of these cases yes I /KNOW/ it was not meant to come across like that!!! but y'all accept that as a valid type of media#criticism when it's about anything else!!!!!!!! just not this apparently????!?!!!!#I do not understand how there is such an ABYSMAL treatment of the subject of mental illness in fiction when this is the#memetic Mental Illness Website like genuinely I do not get it I am scaling my walls and banging pots and pans and growling like a rabid dog#IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT THE MESSAGE A STORY IS TELLING YOU GOTTA APPLY IT HERE TOO#I AM ALSO THE LAST PERSON TO SAY THAT YOU'VE GOTTA ADD A DISCLAIMER OF SOMETHING'S LAUNDRY LIST OF FLAWS BEFORE YOU TALK ABOUT IT#BUT JESUS FUCKING CHRIST YOU HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE ON SOME LEVEL EVEN IF IT'S JUST TO YOURSELF THAT THINGS HAVE FLAWS#YOU'VE GOTTA BE AWARE OF SHIT#WHEN WILL WE HAVE THE OUTCRY OVER BURY YOUR DISABLED THAT WE DO OVER BYG (WHICH IS ALSO BAD BTW)#I GUARANTEE YOU WE WON'T BE GETTING A SEPARATE FUCKING CON OVER FANDOM OUTCRY THAT'S FOR SURE#I'm making a rule: if you can prove to me that you've started cxgf after reading this and/or if you can prove to me#that you've watched pure (channel 4/hbo max-the one with charly clive) I'll write a fic for you#let's see if I get sniped for criticizing both the beloved sacred mads show AND the plane crash girls show#if I see ONE more comment about how either of those is a perfect show that Gets What All The People Want I will in fact spontaneously#combust.#(and before you @ me yes I have any and all permutations of show tags blocked I'm not just being mean to be mean)#my god remember what happened the last time I tried to talk about this a;lsdfkajs;ldfkj#good thing I turned off anonymous asks!!#this is not even getting into some of the SMALLER fandoms#like I do not ever want to think about the takes I saw for ctrlz EVER again
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gearing up to start drawing again and i’ve been reflecting on why i draw and why it frustrates me when people say they cant draw or could never draw or whatever and, okay, yes i have spent years doing this for reasons which would involve a whole nother post than what i’m actually thinking about at the moment but i digress
i think people get self conscious of their art because they think if they don’t want to put the time in or get to a certain level that art isn’t worth pursuing at all and today i am breaking down your door and i am sitting down on the floor with you and i am telling you listen: the reason to do art is not to post it and it isn’t to be good at it and it isn’t to draw every leaf on every tree. the reason to do art is because you are a magician and you are putting a little guy there that wasn’t there before. and then later you can open your book of little guys and be like :)
“oh but I couldn’t” shh! SHUT! i am TELLING you RIGHT NOW that if you draw the worst little guy possible and you look at that little guy and you laugh and smile, then that literal 60 seconds it took you to draw that is more worth all of the years that i spent learning to draw because i desperately wanted people to notice and appreciate and be friends with me in school (and yes, occasionally it does happen but mostly in my experience that motivation backfires because half the people just want shit for free but wouldn’t give you the time of day and half the people are too intimidated to even talk to you). maybe it’s because i’m old now but who cares about that shit, you draw because it’s good to create something and look at it and smile because it’s yours and it belongs to you and you did that.
#if you go draw a little guy right now i will put a gold star on your forehead#i dont even need to see it#do you like sparkle? draw sparkle.#thinking about this because out of all the art i do on a daily basis that one of my most beloved drawings is literally like#a pierogi with dot eyes and stick legs that i drew in 30 seconds#people want that guy everywhere and when they see it they think it's so charming#and i used to be like why does no one look at the pieces i spend 4 hours on#and now i think of it as like wait a second i have an amazing superpower to draw really fast and make people smile lots#it took a long time to see past my own insecurities but man#i am telling you it doesn't start for you until you just content yourself with the fact that you like to draw your little guy#and im using guy in the most gender neutral possible way#that can be your blorbo that can be your pet that can be your creepy lamb with hands like my sister drew once#anyway i'm done im gonna go draw those little guys you sent me now#hapo text#sorry i cant draw i just realized i didnt actually eat today brb
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like it’s VERY very important to not text and drive. and i understand how dangerous it is to do that and to be distracted at all in any way for any amount of time on the road. i know it’s important to learn about these stories and bear witness to them. but i just think. like idk. watching multiple of them every day for 10 days (with a two day break halfway through for the weekend) is realy… like idk. i think after seeing a couple you can get the point. i don’t want to sound dismissive or lackadaisacal and im scared im sounding like that but i just am so freaked out by all of this and witb every new horror they’re showing us it’s scaring me worse.
#purrs#delete later#car accidents tw#death tw#child death tw#ask to tag#drivers ed tag#like this sucks so bad. we go from watching a video about how to drive in the city… to a 10 minute vid of a man talking abt how he hit and#killed 3 kids and it shows a PICTURE OF THE SCENE OF THE ACCIDENT WITH BLOOD AND EVERYTHING… and then after the video we immediately start#talking about like. fucking street cleaners and how you have to watch out for them. HOW is the video about the kids being hit and killed#part of the flow of the learning. what purpose does it serve. and it’s like these are REAL PEOPLE who died. real kids who existed. and it#just feels kind of fucked up. maybe it’s more fucked up thst im not following the flow and accepting the weight of it but it’s hard to when#im scared as fuck and just want to not be shown gore videos anymore. and then once we pick up the content again like abt street cleaners and#shit i can’t focus on any content bc i have to wind down from seeing the dead bodies and hearing the letter the parents wrote. like how is t#this helping. maybe it’s landing / more necessary for the 16 year olds but im 24. i am a whole adult. i do not take being alive for granted#i am terrified of death and dying and painfully aware of how fragile human beings are and how easy it is to be in danger. this is not#helping me or sending me a message it’s just making me so scared and terrified to even leave the house and unable to stop thinking about#death or injury lol!!! and i can’t tell them to stop and i can’t quit bc i need my fucking license so i have to just put my head down and#do this but it sucks indescribably. and we also saw one of those trick videos again too that makes you feel stupid bc it tells you to count#the number of lkke. things you see and it turns out i missed a few AND they were like did you notice what was going on in the background snd#i didn’t bc i was too busy counting the fucking things they told us to. i want to SCREAM. this makes me feel so stupid and helpless lolllll#<- as i was typing that we were learning about the chance of survival if you are hit by a car at different speeds! bc that’s relevant 😍😍😍😍😍😍#anyways. my therapist was telling me stuff abt how i need to remember this isn’t targeted for me and i need to regulate my nervous system an#and how to calm down when it triggers me but i forgot everything she said literally 5 hours ago and now im here freaking the fuck out so. 🥰
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i hope you know im selectively uploading things to protect you all from lies of p content
#(as in ive only uploaded the first and third one here and the other three are LOP)#not art#why? because i wasnt even the fucking one to play it i watched Asunder playing like. a few fucking scenes because he chewed#through that fucking game like he'd played it a million times (and enjoyed it). and like. i know nothing. of the game#im one of those ''if im making fanart i better know half the games lore minimum or have been playing for years (eg TES)''#but this game? I know next to nothing about it#im saving you from ''haha interesting character concepts go brr but i have to put it in my style so i know nothing AND am playing#with the characters like dolls'' content. just kidding mostly im stopping myself personally but like#its funny af bc i generally upload everything i do (yeah. i really genuinely did stop drawing for ages bc i havent been awake in this#body more than like five mins a day since spring yaddah yaddah but yeah its not that im just not uploading lmfao) and then i open#my recents and its like. I Do Not See It. its very clear that the only things i havent uploaded(or am avoiding working on BECAUSE#i dont want to upload them) are lies of p LMFAO#.... oh when i say ''if im making fanart'' i mean continuously. i do bits and pieces here and there but can you tell lies of p may become#a theme for a hot minute#god wtf has this game done to me. i really cant stand fairytale-based games nor do i ever really like soulsborne-likes lmfao#i also dont like character design when all the characters are really conventionally pretty or lean towards it#...... i fully expected to never even slightly connect w lies of p lmfao
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This is said with an academic lack of judgment but I think pavb¡e shippers and m¡gb shippers are divergent evolution of the same ancestor: no¡rham shippers
#you see. one leaned more into 'pair the canon spares' and the other more into 'we can make them middle aged dads'#and so when presented with new film content they honed those traits more#genuine lack of judgment here i do not care who you ship Pav with or whatever i am just Noticing Trends And Paterns#and on that note#peni handshake jess#anyway theories on how a dinosaur got bitten with a spider because i kinda thought that between being huge and scaly that wouldn't happen#but have i simply overestimated how protective a dino scale is (don't bring up feathers that trex clearly wasn't)#or. you know that one panel of spider-man telling a villain he could have cured cancer but he didn't want to cure cancer#he wanted to turn people into dinosaurs#was that trex just a normal spiderman who got turned into a dino by a villain#and got to keep the spider powers#anyway. those are my thoughts I'm going to go back to scrolling through u tube now#also wow i do not know ship names lol well you can figure them out probably#and yeah I'm just gonna keep adding tags i don't want this silly little thought to end up in the main one lol#but I'm politr#polite#and will tag spoilers so#hope that was enough filler#atsv spoilers
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One thing you need to know about me is that I will never reblog anything that has the addition "this should be reblogged by everyone" or anything of the like.
#unless it's like#really funny and not a guilt trippy kind of bullshit#i can agree 130% with a post and then see that comment and I'm like#yeah no. go fuck yourself.#(this point has been made so many times but people don't get why it's annoying apparently. people don't dislike your stupid addition#because they secretly disagree with the post but because now it seems like some weird social obligation to rb is#rb this or you're a bad person is a clever marketing strategy but it's quite stupid because it weakens the original point#oh you're saying everyone should rb this? well now it looks like the ppl rbing actually just do it out of some feeling#of social obligation. not because they really want to but because they want to fulfill the arbitrary standards you just made up for being#a good person#and don't get me wrong most certainly are most people rb these posts still out of agreement with the original statement#but it's still annoying as fuck and also you'd think ppl would know by now that people don't generally like being told what to do#so my hypothesis is (and i won't do any research to prove or disprove it (i might be very wrong and most people don't mind obviously)) bjt#but my hypothesis is that people who originally agree with the post but have a strong desire of being free in their choices#won't actually end up rbing bc it's just not that free of a choice anymore bc you just had to make it 'obligatory' but we all know#nothing is obligatory on a stupid webbed site like this so they scroll past while people who maybe would have scrolled past now feel#like they might actually be a bad person if they don't do as it says but without actually caring about the content. which diminishes#the positivity the post originally was supposed to spread bc how do you tell ppl actually mean it now when they rb these things#anyway. am i ranting about something completely asinine phenomenon on tumblr.com? yes.#would it be better to not dedicate my time and energy into making a 'hate' post? absolutely. but that will never stop me from doing so#(also works for things like 'you guys HAVE to do xyz [for your (mental) health/etc]'. literally the best advice phrased like this#is counterproductive. post something that doesn't sound like you're judging everyone who does otherwise and maybe ppl will be more inclined#to believe whatever your point or statement is)#ok I'll stop#shut up amy#void screams
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#oohhh girlies in my phone I’m really in it now#I went to talk about this in the tags last night but then I rambled so much I HIT THE TAG LIMIT LOL#but um basically I got re-acquainted with a boy I was friends with when I was nine only to discover that I still have a crush on him???#MAYBE??? I DON’T KNOW????#I genuinely don’t know if I actually do or if I’m just thrilled to find a guy I can talk to like a normal person who doesn’t make me want#to dig a hole in the ground and hide (this is not a dig at the menfolk I’m just nervous around guys my age for some reason)#it’s such a rarity you know???#I just I don’t know aaaaaaaaaahh#I don’t often find people that I’m on the same wavelength with like that. like a kindred spirit thing#and like one thing is he IS a year and a half or so younger than me which is slightly awkward now but won’t be in even just a year or so#my family (in their usual fashion) have tossed him up to me as a potential option multiple times this week and I haven’t been as adverse as#I usually am to their suggestions so like. I think they can TELL haahahahhahahaha#like it doesn’t matter I guess because I’m going on an exchange program and I won’t see him again until next year anyway#but it’s been two days and I can’t stop thinking about it#also the other thing is I don’t have his number but my brother has it and like I’m not going to ask for it because a) my brother would make#fun of me relentlessly and also b) what would I even do with it I’m not that brave#I am perfectly content with just being friends for the moment but I don’t want to let that friendship atrophy in the whole year we don’t#see each other but!!! I’m too awkward!!!#but. anyway. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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