#but we more or less get support albeit very minimal

[shidouryusm]

Everyone praises women when they set boundaries with “my body, my choice” until a hijabi muslim woman enters the equation 😒

[rinbylin]

lzj ep 21

yeah i enjoyed the first quarter quite a bit but at the same time i've been quite aware it's not objectively tip-top. so indeed the weaknesses have reared its head in the recent few episodes where the story has transitioned into a different kind from its initial fake marriage premise which was not difficult to pull off if you understand the simple mechanisms of it.. otoh i just don't think they dealt with the transition very well, albeit the show still being watchable. then again, its faults are totally not unique to itself. they're extremely common romance drama storytelling problems. so if not for the fondness it had managed to earn earlier on, i would not have even bothered with this post

a thing from this episode that i like(!!) though: as 'better let the truth out and have cxz suffer NOW!!' lobbyist, i admit i failed to consider the other even more delicious possibility which is DENYING HIM THE CATHARSIS OF HONESTY. make him suffer in a whole other dimension yeahhhhh babyyyy. our girl lmt pretty much telling cxz she wants him to keep suffering from not being able to tell her the truth...I SUPPORT YOU QUEEN <3 剪不清理还乱 is a great direction to head into even though atp idk if writers are competent enough to see it through

then there was lmt literally acknowledging what i had on my mind for these couple of episodes: cxz doesn't actually love her - he only knew and love her as lmt the (amnesiac) wife. but as audience we also know the writers are trying to counter that by (1) showing us how ~sincere~ cxz's feelings for lmt are, citing that she has shown him the bliss of a simple life etc etc; (2) having him repeatedly state that lu wen (aka lmt) is his only worthy opponent so to say he and lmt (the real her, not the wife lmt) are intellectual matches. but the most fatal problem is that we have NOT! GOTTEN! TO SEE/UNDERSTAND! WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN THEM AS COMPETING RIVALS!! so far it's merely cxz's side of the story, saying that he has a special feeling for "lu wen". but in what way? how? we know almost next to nothing about what went on between them as rivals - except lmt almost killed him a few years ago. (AND!! lmt hasn't seem to echo his feelings about their special relationship of rivalry??) so it makes point (2) quite an unconvincing case yet. which in turns make their post-amnesia and aka the "real" relationship quite frail.

another fatal issue is that it feels like, to me, that there's no love left in lmt for cxz at this point (the bathtub scene was what drove home the interpretation for me)... there's very minimal portrayal of any struggle, conflicting feelings in her. i think this is one of the way its earlier writing issues manifest as well: it's always quite clear why lmt is so important to cxz beyond their niceties as a married couple. but it's far less defined what cxz meant to lmt as a person. what value does cxz provide to her at a deeper intellectual and emotional level? when she was amnesiac wife lmt, she liked him for being a gentle, understanding guy - which turned out to be a mere persona of huaiyang wang. she stuck with him because he was her husband, but it turned out their marriage is just a ruse. so what is left? it's no wonder she seems to have little affection for him left yet that completely defeats the purpose of a romance drama... and i just don't feel the same joy i felt in earlier episodes whenever they're together at home..

i've come to feel the story would work a lot better if it wasn't a romcom (comedy as in a broad sense) and not tied to an obligation of HE. i don't even want them to end up together romantically. i just want them to get entangled and emotionally torment each other lol (oops sorry what's new of me). and so when the writers made cxz say that whole speech to his mother about how he truly loves lmt and how she has changed his life...and that he doesn't want just a "相见如宾" (ie. cordial) marriage. i felt almost betrayed because bitch (@ the writer / cxz) you owe it precisely to 相见如宾 that i even adored the show in the first place!!! it is thanks to 相见如宾 that your relationship even took off in the first place! in what way do you think its current state is different from it? this is a fake marriage story how dare you say that. :[ ...but again what's new. i've seen these problems from dramas a million times over by now.

one of the reasons why the earlier episodes worked - within the parameters of the fake marriage + identity porn tropes - is that it managed to have the reactions of both leads bounce off each other consistently. what i mean by that is...like in the earliest arc, despite cxz being the mastermind behind the bogus life lmt was living in, lmt was still able to display agency by reacting accordingly to the circumstances around her. she duly suspected cxz and was consequently driving the story - then cxz had to react accordingly and twist around more of the truth. there's a pretty nice push-and-pull between them - which is actually sorely missing ever since a few episodes ago when cxz was moping around coming up with solutions to keep lmt by his side. at that point, lmt totally takes a backseat in the narrative. and now that lmt has regained her memories, cxz is the one who is passively reacting to the occurrences in their relationship (though he's still taking the charge in the politicking plotting stuff). this is also what i meant about the writers dealing with the transition poorly.

these are pretty much the broad strokes of the main problems i'm identifying from the writing especially after ep 21... besides a few of the other pesky things like cxz's mum and yun'er's characters being completely flat stereotypes and are so extra annoying that they're fuelling the problems in the writing of the lead's relationship. (i have lost count the number of times i rolled my eyes when cxz's mum is onscreen... i think a mum character who appears loving but completely insensitive to her son is so interesting and they actually have a fucked up mother/son relationship but it looks like the writers are incapable of actually realising it so.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[sularis]

TW/CW // very detailed descriptions of drug abuse, death/suicide, insinuation of SA and DA

I happen to find myself in a minimal margin of people that actually see all the wrongs in it. And there aren't a lot of us left.

Throughout my life, I think I'm safe to say I saw everything. Grew up on the least secure street in my city and, if you know something about those, you know just the kind of people you'll meet there. The poorest, the most forgotten by their government kinds of people happen to live in there and I was one of them. And so was my mother and her mother, unfortunately. My grandma ended up there after her husband left them without a house, after his gambling addiction left them penny-less and his alcoholism left him jobless. She couldn't divorce him, so she was forced to raise her seven kids in there and it made her a bitter shell of the person she was always supposed to be.

And there's my mother. As the second eldest, she was made to be a second mother to all of her siblings when hers was busy. She was the only one of her siblings that didn't make it out and that was only because of him. The one that hurt her. She was only fifteen. She gave birth to me when she was sixteen, only because her mother didn't let her abort it. At times I wish she did, for either of us sake. Albeit, it's no use thinking about "what ifs" now. She never blamed me for anything even if she wanted to, I couldn't bring myself to do same myself. She did her best, but living in a place like that, I couldn't be saved from everything.

There is no actual drug that has no drawbacks, they just might not be seen as obvious as others. I have tried a bunch in my life and am still in recovery from few, but even when I saw myself in the mirror, at the peak of my heroine addiction, wasting my life away and spending so much on it, keeping myself from relapsing when trying to fight with the drug was always the hardest thing to get through. Anything before it and after it is pretty easy, especially with a good support system, was easiest thing ever, but trying to recover... I was down to kill someone if it meant that I could get another dose of one thing keeping me alive in the next hour. Every cell in my body was testing me, yearning for more while also yelling at me to stay strong. It really is easier said than done. Once that period of time is past, though, you can only look back at it with a shiver. At least for me it's like that.

That's why I never wanted to do anything with the new drug. The premise is promising, but getting addicted to it sounded always too easy for me. And indeed, it was easy to get addicted to it, I've seen it happen firsthand with my closest friends and I've seen the consequences of trying to cut yourself from it.

When I was twenty-one, past most of my most hardcore addictions and only recreationaly smoking weed from time to time, a friend of mine brought it to my apartment, which I shared with my best friend, Julie, during one of our movie nights we did weekly. He explained what it was and was selling it so hard that a lot of our other friends present took it almost immediately, including her. They tried to talk me into taking it too, but I firmly said I was good with my joint, but they can feel free with explaining the experience to me. Not even five minutes have passed and the drug already kicked in. Everyone that took it described the experience as the "happiness they haven't felt in ages". With tears of happiness in their eyes, my long time friends described how their anxiety suddenly ceased to exist and that they didn't feel trapped at all. It was great to hear friends, who have attempted a few times before, say that the urge is gone, like it never was there. For a moment I even thought that maybe I was wrong, maybe it actually was a miracle in working... Up until they started talking where they can get it from and how much it costed. The price alone freaked me out. A gum pack?! And its such a new thing, it has to be unrestricted too. And when he said that he get it from a dealer that I used to take my addreall from, I made it clear to myself I will never even think of taking it. But Julie immediately asked him for their contact detail.

"I'm having my finals soon, the stress will kill me!" she explained when I tried to stop her "I'll cut it once I'm past them, alright?"

I shouldn't have said alright back to her. For the next month she took the drug every few days during her studying sessions and, as much as I hate to admit it, she was the best version of herself at that time. She was always cheery and happy, she didn't let the work consume her like she would before in stressful situations and even kept the same positive outlook on life when I brought a new boyfriend home. That's how I try to remember her: happy, like never before. Once her finals were past her and she knew she did astonishingly well on them, she kept her word and stopped taking the drug. A few days later, she started feeling something was wrong, right about the time that it was said to stop working. It started with nervous tick attacks out of no where, she could be relaxing to a nice book when suddenly a weird level of anxiety got to her and she had to put it down to physically pull one of her hands away from her arm, because she started gripping it so hard that it really started to hurt. Panic attacks became a daily norm rather quickly after that and they could last for so long that we needed to take her to hospital so they could give her a stress reliever, other than the drug that she got addicted to in the first place. The stress would keep her up at night up until she passed out, just to be awoken five minutes later to a sleep terror. Not even her comforter was able to ease her struggle and very quickly her health started declining to point she couldn't even talk to me or recognize me anymore. A lot of her hair had fallen out, her eyes were constantly the same shade of bloody red, she was way thinner too. And at that point, it's only been a week after she cut the drug off. She vomited constantly, couldn't eat at all and whenever someone tried to talk to her or touch her, she would start shivering and crying. She looked like a skeleton wearing a human bodysuit, but no matter what, I hoped that she could get through this, so long as we would be around her. Me and my boyfriend, that is. I assured her we wouldn't leave her whenever I could, but I suppose it wasn't enough.

I went out with him once, left her unattended. I thought I proofed our apartment enough so she couldn't harm herself, as I've seen her playing with a knife around her wrist recently, but it wasn't good enough it seems. She opened the window. We lived on eighth floor. I didn't see it coming. I should have, but I didn't.

I promised myself to not let anyone I care for touch that drug ever again. I was included in that promise too. I grew to despise it very quickly. But everyone else seemed to love it, so much so that it became legal and even normal for a person to take. We became the weirdos for not wanting to get it instead of my antidepressants. But I couldn't ever not think of the drug and see Julie slowly dying in front of my eyes, because the negative emotions the drug blocked before, came back to her with force she forgot how to deal with. She got used to not have to work around her stress and anxiety, so when she was exposed to them again, she didn't know how to fight them, she didn't remember it. You'd think that just two months without any sadness or anxiety wouldn't be too long to forget it completely, but either it was that easy or the drug also helped to skip the process.

Nevertheless, I needed to move away from the place that brought so many bad memories. We found a pretty nice place for two with my boyfriend and tried our best to move on with life. Which was really hard when no longer than a month after that, he admitted that he's been taking the drug himself. I didn't even notice it because he was taking half a normal dose, so he could still feel negative emotion, just less than normally.

I lost my shit at him. I yelled and insulted him for doing something that has such dangerous consequences for withdrawing. He yelled back that he had it under control and wouldn't ever go as far with it as Julie did. I cried that he betrayed me and I couldn't even look at him in disgust. He growled that it was my fault that he started taking it in the first place, that I was such a downer after Julie's death that it started to rub off on him and that I could only blame myself for that. I told him to leave my house and never return. He slammed the door as a goodbye.

I was in a very dark place afterwards. I lost two closest people to me in such a short amount of time... I couldn't help but feel guilt and regretting every single choice I made up until that point. I shouldn't have invited that friend to our weekly movie nights. I should've been more stubborn in what I was saying when she asked about the dealer. I should've lock all the windows. I should've talked to him about my past with drugs more. I shouldn't have blown up in his face so badly. I should've called and apologised afterwards. It was already done. I couldn't blame them, they probably wouldn't either.

The drug hit mainstream and was as important to people as insulin is to a diabetic, which meant that its price skyrocketed. It was harrowing visiting my mum just to see our street become a graveyard for those who couldn't relearn their coping mechanisms quick enough. She was keeping strong, though, and promised me that she wouldn't take it either, although it was suggested to her before. I was glad to at least have her on my side and stayed with her for a while. It was always comforting to be held in her arms and I really needed that at the time.

It's been around a year since everything took place. I'm holding on, surprisingly, though my friend circle became very sparse. There barely are people who don't take the drug at all left and I learned that trying to befriend someone who uses it regularly, feels like I'm talking to a robot made for the company that sells it. I became an outcast, but that's honestly better than any other option I considered.

My life's been going pretty okay-ish when I suddenly got an invite from my ex. It was a short message asking if we could meet up around 3pm at once our favourite restaurant in the mall. I probably would've dismissed it if not for one detail. It was worded like a cry for help. I tried asking why did he want to meet up like this after a year of no contact, but he simply said that he will explain when we meet face to face. I agreed to meet him.

I arrived a it early just to get accustomed with the place again. I used to avoid it, but now, it felt like a brand new place. He arrived at point 3pm and when he sat down in front of me, I almost didn't recognise him. Back when we used to date, he presented himself like a punk, with coloured hair and piercing everywhere he could possibly put it, but now... He looked like a middle class bachelor that plays tennis biweekly. His face also changed. You could see that his face muscles have been so used to smiling that they naturally curve upwards, even when he wasn't smiling. His eyes, though, they told me everything i needed to know.

"Hello, Sam, it's been a while, haven't it? How have you been?" he asked me politely.

"You... I-I, I've been... alright. I've been alright" I answered trying my best to keep it together "Why... did you ask to meet me, Casper?"

He put on a wide smile in response, trying his best not to make the corners of his mouth shake so much in pain. It was a terrifying scene to look at.

"I just... wanted to... Haha. Crazy story, actually, I was just sitting in our bedroom with my... my fiancee!" he showed me the ring on his finger, his hand was shaky and nails bitten to the shortest they can be before reaching the skin "She was angry...with me. Silly me, I accidentally knocked her makeup brush on the ground, so she... screamed at me... loudly... And then fell asleep!"

"Oh my god" the smile he was wearing just made it more depressing to listen to "Are you... okay? Is that why you wanted to see me?" concern filled my voice and I could see his eyes start to water.

"Hah! Don't worry. She only does that when she's... of the drug... you know the... one. She's, often. Off it. But I... I don't know! I just went on my phone and decided to text you after that, haha. Silly me!" as he finished he took a small box and poured out three tablets of the drug he was very clearly on right now. Without any hesitation he started taking one after another and then pouring another two out of it.

"Wh-wh, ah, C-Cas, hey hey hey!" I grabbed him by the wrist to stop him from taking so many of them at once "Stop! You, y-you can't take this much at once, this is--"

"It's the only way they are able to work now" he cut me off, his voice sounded desperate, the smile was gone of his face "I can't... not... take them. I feel the emotions coming back, I cannot... Sam... Please" he pulled his sleeve up as much as he could to show me the endless bruises and scars he wore in secret. I was horrified. "She does this... when her pills stop working. She only takes them when she has to go out, otherwise... I can't not take them... or I'll feel it all... Sam... help me...."

I was mortified at every single word I heard and even more as I saw him once again become this happy-go-lucky person, once the drug kicked in again. This wouldn't stop if I let him just go. The drug made him numb to her abuse, so he could stay and be happy with her even if all he was was an accessory to her. I couldn't let him be killed because of this drug too, even if it was in a different way.

With tears rolling down my cheeks, I got up and hugged him tightly. Like I used to when we were together.

"Ou, jolly!" even though happy, his voice was shaky "Don't mind if I do, too" he hugged me back, and for a minute I felt like I had him again. When I let go, his face was wet too. He couldn't stop crying "Oh that's... a reaction, surely."

"You're coming with me" I said seriously and took him by his hand.

"Oh! We are we going?" he asked innocently, following as I led him out of the restaurant.

"To safety. Anywhere you can be safe."

Year 2025. A new drug was recently discovered that makes you unable to feel negative emotions for a few days without any drawbacks to your health. It’s easy to produce and costs like a pack of gum. Everyone takes it. But you absolutely don’t want to.

[rubynadiaza]

Benefits and Marketing Ideas for Nonprofit Organizations Using SMS Messenger

SMS Messenger is a strong specialized instrument for philanthropies, empowering them to more readily connect with allies, share significant updates, and drive gathering pledges. In any case, how might not-for-benefit associations actually utilize this correspondence channel?

In this article, we'll investigate the advantages, use cases, and genuine instances of SMS marketing for philanthropies.

7 Benefits of SMS Messenger for Not-For-Profit Organizations

Not-for-profits have seen positive outcomes from SMS campaigns. How about we see a few top justifications for why this divert is filling in prevalence and driving outcomes.

High Open Rate.

One of the top reasons charitable associations benefit from SMS is its high open rate. Texts get opened 98% of the time, this is almost multiple times the open pace of messages. This can guarantee your messages are seen.

Speedy Correspondence.

Messaging empowers speedy ever changing correspondence. Most texts are perused in no less than three minutes of receipt, and the typical reaction time to a text is 90 seconds. This permits you to rapidly speak with contacts.

Customized Correspondence At Scale.

Text informing permits charitable associations to have customized discussions at scale. You can participate in a few each on-one message discussions in turn, while with a call, you can converse with each individual in turn. You can likewise set up a mass messaging effort for your charity to contact many individuals simultaneously.

Contact Individuals on Their Go-To Channel.

Instant messages are the most well-known strategy for correspondence around the world. More associations are utilizing this correspondence channel to more readily interface with their contacts.

Highly Engaged In Crowd Records.

SMS is a type of select in promoting. This implies you can interface with individuals who need to hear from you. This assists you with arriving at contacts bound to draw in with your messages and suggestions to take action.

Solid Return on Initial Capital Investment.

SMS promoting efforts convey areas of strength for an on venture. With the high open rate and drew in crowd records, it drives results for organizations. Albeit most SMS stages require a membership, messages cost about a penny to send, which is less expensive than different types of promoting like inquiry or regular postal mail.

Simple To Set Up And Scale.

With the right stage, SMS marketing is not difficult to scale. SMS platforms assist charities with concentrating messages into one simple to-utilize discussion inbox, similar to the one you see on your telephone. Messaging is likewise a natural channel, so it doesn't need a lot of extra staff preparing. This empowers you to deal with the correspondence channel and scale it effortlessly.

7 Marketing SMS Messenger Advertising Thoughts

SMS permits marketing associations to further develop correspondence and beat difficulties. Here are far to use SMS Messenger advertising for not-for-profit associations.

Further Develop Financing and Gift Requesting

Despite the fact that it's essential to get reliable subsidizing and gifts, it very well may be difficult for charities. Conventional raising support effort can be unwieldy, expensive, and just contact a restricted crowd.

Text messaging empowers not-revenue driven associations to contact a more extensive crowd for a minimal price. Not-for-profits can use mass messaging to arrive at many contacts immediately with customized gift demands and raising money refreshes. Since instant messages have such a high open rate, you can guarantee messages are perused.

SMS stages additionally empower you to fragment your crowd rundown to send more customized gift demands. For instance, your association could have one directive for past givers and the individuals who haven't yet upheld your objective.

Smooth Out Volunteer and Support Enlistment

Numerous philanthropic associations should select workers or supporters for occasions. Notwithstanding, this enlistment cycle can very time-consume.

Text Messages can smooth out the worker and support enlisting process since it assists you with arriving at contacts straightforwardly on their cell phones. You can send a mass message to make volunteers aware of new open doors or get organizations keen on supporting your association. You can likewise text to organize meeting times, share updates, and gather essential documentation from supports.

Increment Volunteer Maintenance and Commitment

As well as getting new workers, not-for-profits should hold the people who have assisted previously and keep volunteers in the loop.

Texting can assist you with keeping past workers drew in and informed about their responsibilities. For instance, you can impart significant updates to them, send SMS updates for impending occasions, immediately reach out on last-minute changes, and offer appreciation messages. This continuous correspondence can work on volunteer fulfillment and maintenance.

Support Occasion Participation

For not-for-profits, it frequently requires huge exertion and cost to advance occasions and energize local area association.

Not-for-profit instant message showcasing can assist you with successfully elevating occasions to a wide crowd. You can utilize SMS to:

Welcome social class people to an event.

Share bits of knowledge in regards to the event.

Spread content to enable event interest.

Remind members about the event.

Prepared members to any most recent conceivable second event changes.

Thank members for joining the event.

Improve Correspondence Efficiencies

Charities need a successful method for speaking with allies, volunteers, and the local area. Email is many times slow and a call isn't generally the most helpful method for interfacing with occupied individuals.

SMS gives an immediate and helpful correspondence channel to arrive at your contacts. Individuals in a hurry can answer any place they are found and whenever it might suit them. In addition, SMS messages is one of the best channels for time-touchy data since individuals check their telephones frequently. This guarantees that beneficiaries get significant updates as soon as possible.

Messaging additionally empowers two-way discussions, which permits you to rapidly and productively answer questions.

Elevate Ally and Volunteer Commitment

You need to keep allies associated with your association, and that implies you really want to keep them drew in and mindful of your philanthropic's exercises, accomplishments, and subsidizing needs. In any case, staying aware of this nonstop correspondence effort can every now and again be trying.

SMS marketing can help philanthropies with staying in touch with their partners. Use text promoting for philanthropies to share instances of beating affliction, program invigorates, and squeezing prerequisites for volunteers or sponsoring. Keeping people in the know can make a sensation of neighborhood support collaboration.

Improve With Input from Volunteers or Allies

All associations need to improve consistently and address the issues of their allies. Be that as it may, you want to gather input to assist with understanding their requirements and trouble spots, and gathering this criticism can be a test.

Charities can use SMS Messenger to convey reviews and surveys. These text studies can be used to figure out ally inclinations, gather significant criticism, and include your crowd in choices to encourage a superior relationship.

8 Instances of Not-For-Profit Text Messaging

Text message promoting is a flexible instrument that can be used to help occasion participation, remind volunteers about their responsibilities, and solicitation gifts. We should take a gander at a couple of genuine instances of not-for-profit text promoting.

Occasion Welcome

Use an SMS message to welcome the local area to your raising support occasion or celebration. These occasion welcomes assist with expanding attention to your occasion, charitable association, and cause.

Noble Cause Occasion Markdown

Use a limited time SMS message to urge members to pursue a cause occasion. In the accompanying model, Lurie Youngsters' Establishment welcomes a member to pursue a raising support occasion hit Move forward for Youngsters.

Occasion Update

Text messages are an incredible method for reminding participants about an impending occasion. They tenderly remind individuals so you can increment participation. For the best SMS updates, incorporate the date, time, and area of your occasion.

Volunteer Enlistment

Use a text message to draw in additional workers to your association. You can connect past workers or urge other local area individuals to do likewise.

Gift Demand

Numerous charitable associations use SMS Messenger to demand gifts for their objective or solicitation support for a continuous drive. SMS gift demands get straightforwardly to your contact's cell phones and permit them to follow a connection to give.

Gift Thank You Message

At the point when somebody gives to your association, it's a best practice to say thanks to them. Using SMS Messenger to thank a giver can guarantee they receive the message as soon as possible.

Share Giving Tuesday Results

For the overwhelming majority philanthropic associations, giving Tuesday is one of the most significant gathering pledges days. You can use text message advertising to demand gifts on this day and offer outcomes with your contributors. This can assist with further developing commitment and cause benefactors to feel appreciated.

Reengagement Crusade

You can likewise use SMS promoting to reconnect past benefactors or volunteers. This keeps them informed about new drives and what their mean for had an effect in previous years.

Instructions To Begin With Instant Message Advertising for Not-For-Profits

It's easy to begin with SMS marketing. Here are the five critical stages to executing your most memorable mission.

1. Collect you’re SMS Technique.

Laying out your methodology is the initial step to any effort mission, and it's the same with SMS Messenger. In this step, you'll need to decide your utilization case, ideal interest group, and mission objectives.

On the off chance that you need extra bits of knowledge on thinking up a SMS promoting procedure, download our free 12-step guide.

2. Pick A SMS Messenger Platform.

Then, you want to pick a business messaging stage that works for your business needs. To limit your choices, conclude what highlights, evaluating design, and reconciliations you want. You can likewise take a gander at online surveys, demand demos, or test a free preliminary.

Text line makes it simple for charities to involve SMS Messenger with a free preliminary for all clients to test highlights like mass messaging, two-way SMS, and computerizations.

3. Build Your SMS Messages List.

The third step is to get agree to message contacts and develop your contact list. You should get select ins from them to conform to messaging regulations like the TCPA.

4. Create Your Messages.

Then, now is the right time to make your promoting instant messages. You ought to constantly edit and incorporate a source of inspiration so your contacts know what to do.

5. Send Messages.

Presently it's at long last chance to send your marketing messages to your interest group. From here, you can follow execution and improve.

Drive Results with a Mass Messaging Administration for Not-For-Profits

Further develop correspondence with backers, contributors, and the local area with a mass messaging administration intended for philanthropies. Text line is a top tier stage for charitable text messaging. With strong highlights like two-way texting, mass messaging, bunch messaging, and mechanizations, you can smooth out correspondence and further develop results.

Yet, don't simply carelessly trust us. Attempt Text line free today and see with your own eyes how simple it is use messaging to work on your charity.

[sophomore-slumpo]

University Colloquium Water Crisis Blog Part 1 of 3

The first thing I thought of while reading about water conservation was a book I read in my language arts class in middle school called A Long Walk to Water by Linda Sue Parker. The novel used the story of a young girl in Africa as an appeal to pathos, as an emotional core, while also diving into the facts and figures about water usage around the world. Some examples are how much water is used for watering lawns and golf courses and other similarly wasteful uses. I also remember thinking of this book on our second field trip of the semester to ECHO Farms, since the tour began with showing us different types of wells and ways to get water instead of hiking out to poor-quality surface water sources. Most of the information I read while researching the water crisis was not new to me. I was aware of the existing problem; however, I was unfamiliar with specific organizations and programs that are addressing the water crisis. Much of my current research and findings reinforced what I already knew and did not present any conflicting information. It was reassuring to see that the information was clearly connected with class discussions and field experiences. The water quality, aquifers, and groundwater were topics of discussion in Week 8 of our course and our very first field trip on the campus trails. On a local level, I think this is a solvable problem; however, it will require great effort. It is an issue that goes beyond the behaviors of individuals and households. While the planet has a lot of water, most of it is not potable due to it being saltwater. There is also the problem of human behaviors that waste drinking water and it doesn’t appear that we prioritize making drinking water accessible to those who need it. Based on the biology textbooks, the existing water crisis will require a multi-faceted approach to extend our fresh water supply and move towards sustainability. Some traditional methods have incorporated the use of dams and aqueducts. Other solutions currently in use include conservation or saving water whenever possible to use less water and use it more efficiently. This can be achieved through engineered features (i.e., high-efficiency washing machines; low-flow showers, and toilets) and behavior modifications (i.e., native landscaping that requires little irrigation, not running the water while brushing your teeth, taking quick showers instead of baths, and repairing leaky faucets); recycling or harvesting rainwater for reuse or to recharge aquifers; efficient irrigation; water conservation strategies in agriculture like growing crops supported by natural rainfall or more efficient irrigation systems and farming techniques that reduce evaporative losses; minimizing groundwater pollution that can lead to water scarcity by using fewer chemicals in farming. There is also the implementation of programs addressing outdated sewage systems to avoid water in an area becoming disease-ridden due to poor sanitation. Another method in use, albeit to a lesser extent, is nature-based infrastructure, which involves harnessing ecosystems like forests and wetlands to act as infrastructure, like pipes and pumps, to absorb water and increase water infiltration. Of course, one of the most important methods to combat the current (and future) water crisis is education. There are two aspects to the education component. First, those who are not dealing with water scarcity must be educated to be in a position to help. Second, those facing it can be educated on ways to prevent the worsening of the problem. Education also includes supporting clean water initiatives. Water solutions may appear to be a burden, but they are also an opportunity to resolve the world’s shared water challenges, which will improve the lives and livelihoods of billions of people and benefit our surrounding ecosystems.

[kuroopaisen]

cause & effect || chapter 7

➵ your work friend, kuroo, has a tiny favour to ask. unfortunately, that favour includes convincing his family that you’re very much in love with him and have been for a while now. let’s just say it’s easier than you’d assumed.

warnings: f!reader, mentions of divorce

wc: 5.7k

m.list | ch. 6 ↞ ch. 7 ↠ ch. 8

It’s frustratingly cold as you step out onto the street in the late afternoon, scarf pulled up around your cheeks and gloved hands stuffed in your coat pockets. Sure, it’s a bit stuffy inside a jumper, a jacket, and an outercoat, but it’s what you’ve got to do. It’s the sort of afternoon that you want to spend inside, curled up next to your heater as you throw on a shitty Christmas film. Instead, you’re going to brave the minefield that is your boyfriend’s mother.

Well, not your real boyfriend. But his mother doesn’t know that – and she’s certainly unlikely to be any less critical of you regardless. You’re not sure the whole ‘deceit’ aspect makes it any less stressful. If anything, you feel more pressure to play your part well; for his sake more than anything else.

The reason for this mess is waiting for you, leaning against the nose of his car, dressed in a surprisingly stylish black coat and red scarf. He looks so nonchalant, gazing down the street with the same expression he has when trying to figure out the most appropriate sign-off to a work email.

“Morning,” you yawn, shuffling towards him.

Kuroo grins at you, his nose and cheeks bitten red by the cold.

For how tall and intimidating he looks, he’s got a nice smile.

“You sure you can breathe in all that?” He teases, appraising your winter gear with a playful glint in his eye.

You glare at him, shuffling towards him in all your layered glory.

“Don’t tell me you’re one of those men who likes to brag about how he never gets cold,” you huff, tapping his foot with your own. He doesn’t seem the type to have such a lack of self-awareness, but it’s not impossible that he’d just say something like that to wind you up.

“Nah,” he grins. “I just go for fashion over comfort.”

“You’re doing a terrible job then,” you giggle. Of all the words that come to mind when you think ‘Kuroo Tetsurou’, fashionable is not one of them.

Kuroo places an aghast hand on his chest, the look in his eyes not quite matching up with his slack jaw. “And here I thought we were friends.”

“Aren’t friends supposed to be honest with each other?” You tilt your head to the side with a sparkle in your eyes.

The nervousness bubbling in your stomach is already subsiding. It’s a silly little thing, a bit of meaningless banter on a winter’s morning, but you feel better. Embarrassing, really.

“You wound me,” he chuckles, shaking his head. He stands to his full height, rolling his shoulders. “You ready?”

You nod. “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

Recognition flashes in Kuroo’s eyes, his expression morphing from relaxed to mildly perturbed. “Thanks for doing this, by the way.”

You wave a hand at him before promptly stuffing it back in your pocket. “No problem. Also, I get a free dinner out of it.”

Kuroo raises an eyebrow at you, but his expression softens slightly. Although, you’re not sure it’s enough to ease the guilt he must be feeling.

(“Are you sure?” Kuroo asks, his brow furrowed as he leans across your work cubicle. His voice is quiet, hushed, as though he doesn’t want anyone else to hear. “You really don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”

“You sound like a broken record,” you laugh. It’s true; as surely as the sun rises and sets, Kuroo asks if you’re sure you really want to do this at approximately one in the afternoon. Sometimes at two. “It’s fine,” you smile. “I offered, didn’t I?”)

“Well…” He sighs, turning around and opening the car door. “Ladies first.”

You nod as you slip into the passenger seat. The stale heated air burns the inside of your nose; a sensation you firmly associate with the winter.

Kuroo is quick to join you on the other side, legs a little too long to fit comfortably despite his seat being pushed back quite far. You smile to yourself; he really is a strange mix of all the confidence and debonair of a successful businessman and all the awkwardness of an overgrown child.

The more you think about it, the more it makes sense that he’d be the one to ask this of you. But it’s on your own volition that you sit in his car, about to head off to see his mother.

Maybe this is going overboard. But something about his face while he was on the phone to his mother still bothers you. The panic, the exhaustion, the fear – he’s never acted like that with his dad’s side of the family. Something’s obviously up.

But you’re not sure how to casually mention that in conversation. ‘Oh, hey, I noticed things were kind of tense when you were on the phone to your mother, do you want to talk about it?’ It’s not even your place to pry.

At the very least, you want to support a friend ‘in need’. That feels reasonable enough.

✧ ✧ ✧

The drive is painfully silent.

You try your best to make light conversation, but it’s hard. Kuroo’s too deep in his own head to have a proper discussion. The joviality he’d greeted you with this morning quickly dissipated, replaced by an unusually sombre expression.

He’s never usually this quiet. There’s usually a quip, or perhaps a small observation he’d like to share. Seeing him this quiet, this withdrawn… it’s unusual. Well, for you, at least. Perhaps the Kuroo you knew was just a front, a mask securely fixed on to make workplace relationships run smoothly.

But… you’d like to think you know him better than that by now.

Forty minutes feel like eighty. But thank God it’s over.

He doesn’t even need to announce that you’ve arrived. The palpable air of dread that fills the car is indication enough.

That, and the fact that you’re currently parked in front of what appears to be a very standard house of the upper middle class. It looks rather fancy, with perfectly tended-to hedges and white walls. It almost looks like a show home, albeit a lot smaller.

“You ready?” Kuroo sighs, turning to you with tired eyes.

You nod. “I’m ready to charm the pants off your mum.”

You regret the words before they’ve even left your mouth.

Kuroo snorts. “Really? That’s the turn of phrase you’re going with?”

“I could run off and live a long, loving life with your mother,” you shrug. “You never know, ‘Tetsu’.”

He shakes his head with a smile. “Now that’d be a plot twist.”

“Mhm,” you nod.

Something in your gut wants to linger in the car, to put this off as long as possible. You don’t know what to expect; his father’s side of the family had been a breeze, perhaps even more kind and welcoming than you deserve. But something told you that won’t be the case with his mother.

Kuroo doesn’t knock on the door, nor does he shoot his mother a message. He fishes around in the mailbox and pulls out a pair of keys, reluctantly opening the front door.

You’re dumbstruck by how pristine everything is. It looks as if it’s been cleaned recently; probably in anticipation of your arrival. But you can’t comprehend this place ever being anything less than perfect, though. You can’t envision disorder here, neither in the little hallway or the charming little living room.

There’s something distinctly different about this house. It’s a little cleaner, a little more put together. Where Kuroo’s paternal household seems to revel in its rambunctious sincerity, this one seems more concerned with order.

Everything is where it should be; the design opts for minimalism over sentimentality.

There are still photos on the wall – a gangly, teenaged Kuroo smiling blithely next to a girl who looks a lot like him, a baby you don’t recognise, a group of people you’ve never seen before staring at you with tight smiles…

“We’re here,” Kuroo calls out.

“Yes, dear, I heard the door,” a woman’s voice calls back. Your stomach is tight, wound up like a pocket watch. “Come to the kitchen, would you?”

Kuroo glances at you before complying, shuffling towards the kitchen with the same reluctance as a petulant twelve-year-old boy. You follow, tottering after him as quickly as possible.

The kitchen is just as orderly as the rest of the house; a miracle, given the fact that Kuroo’s mother appears to be making curry.

She’s as tall as you expected her to be. She doesn’t share her son’s penchant for messy hair; instead, she looks like the sort of woman who’d be composed no matter what. She does share her son’s strong jaw and sharp eyes, and it seems like she’d look just as good in a suit.

Suffice to say, you’re even more intimidated.  

“Dinner’s ready, Tetsurou,” she sighs, hand on her hip and ladle in hand.

“We just got here,” he blinks, gormless.

“That’s why I told you to arrive at six,” she says.

You and Kuroo exchange a look.

“Thank you for being so prepared,” you say reflexively.

His mother offers you a smile in response. It doesn’t seem insincere, at least.

“Is Akari coming?” Kuroo asks.

You know that name – his sister. She must be the girl in the photos.

“She couldn’t make it,” Kuroo’s mother replies nonchalantly.

You watch Kuroo’s face as it flickers almost imperceptibly with understanding. There’s something like relief in his eyes – but also something like annoyance. Perhaps both.    

“And Haruki?”

There’s something to the way Kuroo says that name that sets you on edge.

“He’s working late,” his mother replies with a moment’s delay. Maybe she just took some time to process the question – but there’s enough dead air for you to be suspicious.

That’s when you remember.

(“So, your mum’s remarried?” You ask, tilting your head at him.

Kuroo grimaces on the other side of the table. “Yeah. To a lawyer.”

You chuckle, taking another sip of your lunchtime boba. “I take it that’s a bad thing?”

Kuroo bristles. “Well, he just… I just… we never got along, you know?”

“Ah,” you swallow. Incompatibility with a parent’s new partner is its own minefield, fraught with hurt feelings and expectations. “So, your mum remarried, and you stayed with your dad?”

“Mhm,” he nods. “Mum took Akari.”

“That’s your sister, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you talk to her often?” Your gut shifts. Siblings ‘separated’ in a divorce. Fraught allegiances, maybe?

“Yeah,” he takes a sip of his own drink. “I saw her last week.”)

Haruki must be the stepfather.

“I see,” Kuroo murmurs. This time, the look in his eyes is definitely relief.

“Go sit yourselves down,” his mother says, waving a hand at you two. “I’ll bring it out in a second.”

Kuroo obliges quickly, making a beeline for the dining table. You follow in suit, terrified of the prospect of being left alone in the kitchen with his mother. Kuroo pulls out a chair for you and you slide into it, folding your hands in your lap.

Well, the energy here is certainly… different.

Next to you, Kuroo sits with a clenched jaw. The only other time you’ve seen him like this is when dealing with particularly obnoxious sponsors; the ones that’d make even the most calm and patient of your colleagues want to tear their hair out.

But he shouldn’t have to feel like this, should he? It’s his mother’s house. Somewhere that’s supposed to be a home for him. And yet he looks so… so…

You nudge him with your elbow. He turns to you with a start, eyes wide. A smile is all you can offer him, as optimistic and genuine as you can muster.

His eyes soften ever so slightly; and, if you’re not imagining it, you swear you can see the whisper of a smile beginning to form on his own lips.

“Here you go,” his mother chirps, appearing so suddenly you’re not entirely convinced she didn’t just materialise out of smoke.

She sets a plate of curry down in front of you.

It looks gorgeous. Robust, richly coloured, with rice that looks like it’s the perfect consistency… it’s the sort of curry you’d expect to see on an advertisement, or maybe on a delivery app (where the image draws you in, only to leave you deeply disappointed when the real curry shows up looking significantly less appetising).

“Thank you,” you smile at her. Funny that your mood’s suddenly picked up, hm?

“You are most welcome,” his mother chuckles, sitting herself down in her own seat across from the two of you.

The three of you say your thanks before picking up your spoons. If there’s anything you can all agree on, it’s the fact that you want to dig into this curry immediately.

“Have you spoken to your sister recently?” Kuroo’s mother asks, scooping up some rice.

“Uh, yeah,” Kuroo nods, swallowing roughly. “I called her yesterday.”

“Did you tell her about your new girlfriend?”

“Not yet,” he mumbles, cheeks starting to glow.

“Afraid she’ll tease you?”

Kuroo genuinely chuckles at that. “You really think me such a coward?”

“You say that like I’m not also deathly afraid of your sister,” his mother smiles, “she could verbally tear me apart without even breaking a sweat.”

Kuroo’s chuckle becomes a genuine laugh. The sound brings you more relief than you could’ve ever imagined.

Even his mother seems to soften a bit.

She finally looks straight at you, a gentle smile on her face. “I hope it’s to your liking, dear,” she hums.

“Thank you,” you smile back, taking a spoonful of curry. It’s so good – warm and rich, with the sort of texture and flavour you’d expect from a comfort meal. You wonder if her penchant for cooking has passed down to her son.  

“I take it’s a success, then?” Kuroo’s mother smiles wryly, tilting her head at you. You blink at her with wide eyes and round cheeks. Had you… done something?

“Don’t tease her,” Kuroo chuckles.

“I’m not teasing,” his mother tuts. “I just pay particular attention when someone’s trying my cooking for the first time.”

A surprisingly comfortable silence settles over the table as everyone tucks into their dinner, taking a moment to enjoy this dish that tastes like a warm hug.

Kuroo’s mother is the picture of smug satisfaction, revelling in the implicit praise of a silent dinner table. Although, you can’t blame her; if you could make a curry this good, you’d surely be acting the same way.

You’re grateful for the silence. Silence means you don’t need to be quick on your feet, trying to weave a realistic story. This woman seems perceptive; more perceptive than you’d like. Where his dad’s side of the family seem to place trust that Kuroo’s telling them the truth, it feels as though his mother would be able to unravel this little pantomime in an instant.

“So how long have you two been together now?” She coos, looking between the two of you with a sly smile.

You look to Kuroo, trying your best to suppress the panic in your eyes. You hadn’t actually asked what the answer to that question would be. Foolish, really.

“It’ll be, uh…” Kuroo clears his throat, raising an eyebrow. “A few months now?”

You nod along, taking another mouthful of curry. Curse the swirling in your gut – this meal deserves to be enjoyed wholly, not forced down during a bout of anxiety.

“And you were working together before this?” She asks.

“Mhm.”

You reach over and take Kuroo’s hand on instinct. Your grip is firm, tense. Kuroo squeezes your hand back. The amount of comfort it gives you is shameful; this isn’t real. He’s just a friend. A colleague.  

“Ah,” Kuroo’s mother smiles. “So, it really is a workplace romance.”

The way she says it implies that the fact amuses her. Why? Had she not expected that for her son? Did she look down on a workplace romance? Perhaps some people might find it unprofessional, but… it’s not real. Not that you’d tell her that.

She asks a few more questions; where you’re from, what you like to do, what you studied in university.

You answer as truthfully as you can. The less lies you have to keep track of, the better. And, you hope, it might add some credence to your story – even if part of you worries that his mother might disapprove of you.

Not that it matters. You’ve had more than enough of this ‘method acting’.

The questions slow, although you’re not sure Kuroo’s mother is satiated. There’s a certain glint in her eye as she looks between the two of you.

“So,” she asks, her voice like cream, “when am I getting grandchildren?”

Your face flushes hot. The question isn’t being directed at you – well, not really – but the thought is enough to send you into a mental frenzy. Children? But you’re so young, and they’re a big commitment. There’s so much to think about – schooling, mental wellbeing, financial support—

“Be patient, mother,” Kuroo shakes his head, letting the question roll off his shoulders.

He must get asked this a lot, you think.  

“You’re getting on in years, Tetsurou,” his mother purrs.

You resist the urge to frown. If Tetsurou was past his prime, then does that make you an old crone?

“I’m only twenty-four,” Kuroo mumbles. No matter how frequent a question like this, it’s always annoying.

“And?” His mother raises an eyebrow at him.

Kuroo rolls his eyes. You swallow down a laugh with a sip of water.

“And,” Kuroo croons, rolling his head to the side, “I’ve got to focus on my career.” He threads his fingers with yours effortlessly, holding up your clasped hands for your mother to see. “And so does she.”

Your heart is pounding now, blood thrumming in your ears. If none of your words are enough to convince his mother that this is ‘real’, then surely your darkening cheeks must do the trick.

“Well now,” his mother coos, “seems like you’ve got it all worked out.”

Something’s off. It’s in the way Kuroo’s mother looks at him. In the weight of the silence that’s engulfed you. In the way he squeezes your hand a little tighter.

You’re missing something. You can feel it in your gut. There’s an important piece of information you’re not privy to, or perhaps a part of Kuroo’s personal history that you haven’t been told.

Regardless of what it is, Kuroo and his mother seem to be having a silent war over it.

“I never asked,” you cut in, desperate to bring an end to this tension, “but what do you do for work?”

Kuroo’s mother blinks at you for a moment, as if she hasn’t quite processed what you’ve asked. “Oh, I’m a teacher.”

“What grade?” You ask. If you keep this ball rolling, then maybe you’ll all survive the evening.

“Middle school,” she nods, “although truth be told, I feel like I should’ve gone for elementary.”

“Why?” You smile. “Are the pre-teens too hormonal?”

Kuroo’s mother sighs, sitting back in her chair. “You wouldn’t believe how foolish some of those children can be.”

“Tell her about those boys who tried to make a flamethrower during chemistry,” Kuroo chuckles. He’s smiling, but he still looks beleaguered.

“Oh my God,” his mother groans. You worry for a moment; is she mad? Upset? Embarrassed?

None of those, apparently. She launches right into the story, complete with hand gestures.

You laugh along. Next to you, Kuroo’s shoulders slump a bit.

It may not be a victory, but the energy in the room has definitely shifted. You’ve got something to talk about. That’s one problem out of the way.

All you want to focus on now is getting Kuroo through the rest of the evening.

✧ ✧ ✧

A few more hours of idle yet painful conversation maintained primarily by you, and you’re ushered off to bed. It’s barely even nine thirty, but you’re ready to pass out and stay comatose until the morning. And an early rise means you can leave even earlier.

You’re not sure what to make of this place. There’s love here. You’re sure of it. And you think Kuroo’s aware of it, too.

But it’s a different kind of love; one that’s shaped differently, that’s taken on a distinct pallor. A certain distance, maybe? Love expressing itself primarily as nagging concern – something that often doesn’t feel much like love at all. It’s a kind of love that’s difficult to swallow, one that makes you want to push someone away rather than seek them out.

But you can’t be sure of anything. You only know so much. And quite frankly, your head is starting to hurt from all the thinking and worrying.  

The room you’ve been relegated is Kuroo’s old bedroom, but you wouldn’t have guessed. There’s not much of him here; a few Shounen Jump’s here and there, a dusty volleyball sitting on the bookshelf next to a cheap-looking cat trinket.

There’s not much to imply that a teenage boy ever lived here, let alone a working adult. You wonder, briefly, how often Kuroo comes to visit. You can’t imagine he stays long.

The man in question looks far too big for this place, anyway. Even the double bed shoved up against the wall doesn’t look long enough to fit his entire body.

Unfortunately, it’s the only acceptable place to sleep in the room. There’s not even a couch for you to lie on, or even a spare futon.

Maybe you should’ve thought of this before agreeing to visit his mother for the evening.

But it’s too late now; the two of you are stationed on opposite sides of the room, both uncomfortably aware of the fact that there is, believe it or not, only one bed. You’re not against the idea of sharing a bed, even if for one night, but the prospect still feels… strange. Embarrassing, even.

Kuroo clears his throat, taking another perfunctory look around the room.

“I’ll just sleep on the floor,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Oh, no, I—”

“I dragged you into this,” he smiles. “It’s the least I can do.”

You open your mouth to protest, but he’s already leaving the room. The door swings shut behind him softly, leaving just the slightest crack.

You take a quick moment to change in your pyjamas, sitting yourself down on the bed with a sigh.

There’s no way this whole charade wasn’t going to have its uncomfortable moments. You were well-aware of that when you’d entered into it. But it has certainly thrown you some curveballs. If you’d asked yourself three months ago if you’d thought you’d end up sitting on a bed in a stranger’s house, after what was perhaps the most uncomfortable dinner of your life, waiting for your fake boyfriend to return as he sought out a blanket so he could sleep on the floor, you would’ve thought you were quite mental.

But you don’t mind. The thought of Kuroo having to go through this on his own, being lambasted with questions about why he hasn’t settled down and why he isn’t expecting a child… That must be frustrating to bear solo.

You hear voices in the hallway. His mother.

“Oh, she gets cold at night,” you hear Kuroo say, “so we usually use two blankets.”

His mother tsks. “That sounds rather high maintenance.”

Your stomach twists a little at that. So, you didn’t succeed. As soon as you’re out of sight, the façade drops.

“God forbid she gets cold,” Kuroo mumbles.

There’s an awkward pause. Somehow, the silence feels more honest. Like both Kuroo and his mother can talk with no holds barred without you there. Seems there’s a lot you still don’t know.

“I just think the two of you don’t have much chemistry.”

The words jolt through you. It’s not real. Your relationship isn’t real. But for some reasons, those words sting. Is it because they mean you’ve failed to do your job well? You were supposed to be helping Kuroo get his mother off his back, not give her more things to pick at him for.

“Excuse me?” Even Kuroo sounds frustrated.

“She’s no Ritsuko.”

It’s the way she says the word that betrays its relevance.

The silence that follows is pregnant with tension.

Ritsuko must be an ex. But that’s none of your business. He’s not your real boyfriend.

“I don’t want her to be Ritsuko.”

You’ve never heard Kuroo’s voice like that. It’s sharp, tight, unfamiliar.

“I still think you made a mistake, Tetsurou.”

“Would you just drop it?” There’s an edge to his tone, like his voice is armed with a kind of sharpness that people don’t tend to direct towards their parents.

“Well, you know what they say,” his mother sighs, a familiar kind of parental condescension in her voice. “Mother knows best.”

“If you want me to respect your choices, then you have to respect mine.”

Those words seem to strike her silent, the only sound the thumping of feet along the hallway.  

The light of the hallway spills into the room as Kuroo pushes the bedroom door open, scowl on his face and blanket in hand.

You sit up a little straighter.

Should you say something? Were you supposed to have heard that? It seemed intense…

“Can I have a pillow?” He asks. The edge in his voice is gone as he turns to you, the resentment in his face replaced with exhaustion.

“Sure.” You reach behind you and grab one of the pillows, passing it to him.

“Thanks,” he sighs.

He pays you no mind as he starts preparing his ‘bed’ half a step away from you, tossing the blanket on the floor haphazardly. His back is turned, but you don’t need to see his face to know he’s scowling.

“Hey, Kuroo?”

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?” You ask gently.

He sighs, his shoulders sinking. “It’s fine. Don’t worry about me.”

It’s almost comical, how ineffective that request is.

You reach out and take his hand. You’re not sure why; it’s instinct, more than anything.

But Kuroo turns around and looks at you, his eyes wide. The expression makes him look a few years younger, confused and hopeful.

“I’m willing to listen, if you need it.” Your voice is so, so quiet. Is it the right thing to do? Is this what he wants to hear? It’s hard to say. All you know is that he doesn’t deserve to go to bed in such a foul mood.

Kuroo swallows roughly, still staring at you. His hand tightens around yours. His palm feels rough; was that due to the years of volleyball?

He sighs, sitting himself next to you on the bed and leaning back against the wall. He’s still holding your hand.

“It’s just…” His voice is delicate; perhaps even childlike. “Every time I come here, it feels like I’m fourteen again.”

You nod. It’s easy enough to understand – and you’re sure a lot of people feel similarly – but…

“Why?”

Kuroo blinks rapidly for a moment, closing his eyes. “It’s like… any progress I’ve made is dashed, and I’m back to square one.”

“What do you mean?” You rack your brain for any idea of what he could be talking about. Kuroo’s always seemed so secure, so stable. Even when he doesn’t know what he’s doing, he goes at it with such confidence that it makes you feel like he’s got it all under control.

But that’s Kuroo at work.

It seems that his private life was an entirely different stadium – one he can’t navigate so smoothly.

He opens his eyes and looks at you.

There’s a lot he wants to say. You can see it in his eyes. Yet something seems to hold him back.

“I have a hard time letting people in,” he admits.

“Really?” That surprises you. And yet, it doesn’t.

Kuroo is the perfect picture of cordiality, with an enviable ability to get along with most people he meets. He’d been lavished with praise for it at work numerous times.

But cordial doesn’t mean vulnerable. And now you think about it, you can’t quite imagine him letting his walls down all that often.

“Mhm,” he nods. “I… struggle with being vulnerable.”

You nod slowly. The ‘shape’ of Kuroo becoming clearer in the fog. “If you don’t mind me asking… why?”

Kuroo drags his bottom lip through his teeth for a moment, deep in thought. “I think it’s because I’m afraid I’ll get left behind.”

It startles you. The honesty.

Maybe it’s because you’ve just been talking about vulnerability. Or maybe it’s because you’d given him the platform he needed tonight. But you couldn’t have prepared for the weight of those words, nor the way he said them.

“Kuroo…” You murmur. You’re not sure what there is to say. All you know is that you feel that, too. Maybe less intensely than him, but you understand.

“That, or I’ll break someone’s heart,” he sighs, running his hand spare hand down his face. “Every time I’m here, mum grills me about being single. Every damn time. And she likes to bring up…”

He trails off. You can make a good guess of what the rest of that sentence might be.

Ritsuko. It’s not your place to ask; but you can’t help but be concerned for him.

You let the silence sit for a moment. This conversation is for him – it’s his choice what you do and don’t discuss. Who knows, maybe asking about this Ritsuko would just bring him more distress.

“Mum really wants grandkids, if that wasn’t obvious,” he scoffs, running a hand through his hair.

You smile a little. “I figured.”

He presses his lips together, looking up at his ceiling. “I don’t… I don’t want to marry some poor girl while I’m young just to pump out a child or two to please my mother. I don’t want to start a family if it’s just going to collapse around the kids because me and their mother weren’t right for each other.”

It’s coming together in your mind. The need for a fake girlfriend. The fact his grandmother would be concerned enough to arrange a miai. The fact that, during your entire time working next to him, you hadn’t heard anything about a partner.

Kuroo Tetsurou is starting to make sense.  

“That sort of thing can really affect kids, you know?”

“Yeah, I do.”

His hand tightens around yours once more. You’d forgotten he was holding it. But, you suppose, touch from someone you trust can be a wonderful antidote for nerves.

“That, and…” He squeezes his eyes shut again, frowning. “It wouldn’t be fair on whoever I married just because it’s the ‘right’ thing to do according to my mother. It wouldn’t make either of us happy.” He pauses, his voice lowering ever so slightly. “It’d just be a waste of everyone’s time.”

“It sounds like a lot of pressure,” you say. It’s the truth.

Kuroo chuckles. “You could say that.”

He swallows, finally letting go of your hand. “Thanks for coming tonight, by the way. You saved me a lecture.”

“No problem,” you smile. “The food was good, at least.”

Kuroo cracks a small smile. You’re glad for it. He shifts forward on the bed and stands up, stretching his arms above his head. “I’m gonna try and sleep.”

“Good idea,” you nod.

Kuroo flicks the light off and the two of you settle down into your respective beds, shifting uncomfortably under the sheets. Yours feel new; a bit stiffer than you’d like, with all the firmness of that damned blouse you had to wear in high school. Uncomfortable as it is, it’s not the reason you feel so restless.

Today keeps running through your mind, random moments deciding to hang in your mind with startling clarity. Nothing had gone wrong, but it feels like nothing went right. It’s this strange limbo, a skinny path running flush against a mountain, hugged by a steep, seemingly unending drop.

Something clicks into place. Something about how Kuroo sees himself.

Kuroo Tetsurou doesn’t feel whole; he feels like a patchwork, a collage shambled together, drawn from a whole range of other people. Things that seem so certain to other people are lost in a fog for him; ideas about love, about family, about security.

For Kuroo, there’s doubt. A fear that something will fall apart. A fear that he’ll repeat the same mistakes as his parents – the feeling that he already has.      

Divorce tends to do that to people. To families. It’s not as simple as a family unit being cleft in two. Instead, it’s like they’re torn off into chunks, bits of themselves overlapping with bits of everyone else, but with edges that don’t line up nicely anymore. Even when the parents tell their kids they don’t need to pick sides, it feels like every choice you make, every little thing you say, betrays an allegiance that can be weaponised. It leaves people as a bunch of glued together fragments without a place to belong.

Some kids respond with a staunch loyalty to one parent, simplifying their experience into a straightforward tale of good and evil. Others are left adrift, lost in the knowledge that perhaps both parents are wrong, perhaps both have performed acts of cruelty against one another.

But it’s impossible to known which Kuroo is. You have your suspicions, of course, but you know better than to make assumptions.

You roll over onto your side, seeking out his shape in the dark.

“Hey, Tetsurou?”

“Yeah?” His voice is already laden with sleep.

“Thanks for opening up to me,” you murmur. “I really appreciate it.”

There’s silence for a moment. Then, a confused little chuckle. “Shouldn’t I be thanking you?”

It doesn’t sound like he’s teasing you. Thank God.

“Well, it can’t’ve been easy,” you say, trying to find the right words to express yourself. “So… thanks.”

He hums in response. “Yeah, well… thanks.”

Nothing more needs to be said.

As you finally drift off into an uneasy sleep, you hope that, at the very least, you’ve managed to bring your friend some comfort.

[limitlessgojo]

Blood Bound: Red Strings of Fate (Ch 5)

Warnings: Action, Coarse Language, Fighting, Descriptions of Blood

Previous Chapter: Cherry Blossom Storm

Next Chapter: Speed of Sound

Tags: Soulmates AU, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Fem!Reader

Taglist: @lessie-oxj, @rizzo-nero, @whoreuc, @fkngkumiko, @isl3t

Notes: If you want to be tagged for every update, please mention it in the comments below ty <3

Chapter 5: Special Grade

After you bid goodbye to the two girls, you went off back to your dorm room to get dinner, when you bumped into the girl who lived next to your room.

“Oh hi!” She greeted you with a big smile. “I’m Miwa Kasumi, you can call me Miwa. 1st year here! Please take care of me.”

“Hello! I’m Tsuchimikado Y/n, you can call me either Tsuchi or y/n I really don’t mind either way. Also my first year here, please take care of me!” you grinned.

“Ahhh, I’m so nervous to start class here. Are you ready for it?”

“To be honest I’m also nervous, but pretty excited! Ah, I have to go eat dinner now and call my family, but tomorrow I’m free to chat more. You can come over to my room if you’d like.” You offered.

She agreed and bid you goodnight.

◇◇◇

You were able to get to know Miwa before classes began, and it was really fun getting to know her. She talked about her brothers and her origins, but admitted that she couldn’t give out too many details on her technique.

“I’m sorry y/n but I was told to keep it a secret. Even among other jujutsu shi. And I’m just doing all I can to support my brothers.” She sadly spoke.

To which you didn’t mind too much, as you were the same. The Tsuchimikado does its best to keep their strongest techniques and passed down family legends under wraps, to prevent themselves from being targeted by curse users.

“It’s no worry at all, you don’t have to share anything you don’t want to share. And I won’t pry. I come from a minor Jujutsu clan and understand the need to keep cursed technique details a secret.” You smiled and offered her more biscuits.

If you don’t stand out, you would have less affairs to worry about. Unlike the great 3 Jujutsu clans. And because of this, you sort of grew up in a regular loving home, with the exception of normalcy brought by the need to kill curses.

◇◇◇

Classes soon started after and honestly they were not too bad. You all got your student ID cards on the very first day.

You were surprised to see that you were awarded a Special Grade title on the very first day… not what you expected. The rest were, as expected, Grade 4 jujutsu sorcerers.

Everyone starts on the same level and can have their ranks increased as they go. They can get recommended to Grade 2 and/or Grade 1 based on their performance.

Geniuses were said to start as a Grade 2 sorcerer in their first year. Grade 3 was average for a jujutsu high student. And a special grade is an anomaly.

You were pretty sure that you and your family kept your condition under wraps and yet… You looked up to Utahime and asked if you could have a chat outside. She eyed you knowingly and the others stared at you as you left the room.

“Uhhh… There seems to be a mistake with this. I don’t think I am fit to be a Special Grade yet Utahime sensei.” you explained to her truthfully.

“Tsuchimikado chan. You are from a minor Jujutsu clan, that's true. And while it is very rare for an esper to be born in your clan, there was a higher up who was in touch with your father. They received enough information about your technique, albeit not all of it of course, and cursed energy levels, deeming you to be a special grade.”

You just stared at her in shock at all this info. Sure you’ve been sparring with your cousins, and yeah nobody could come close to you when you had mastered your basic barriers and cursed technique. But you didn’t expect to get this far.

Then Utahime sighed, “Okay I’ll be honest. There was one other person who actually pushed for this and was surprisingly agreed to by the elders.”

You felt yourself tense up, “Who?”

“Gojo Satoru said you were capable of dealing a massive destruction over a large scaled area. And of course, the jujutsu higher ups are aware as to what happened to you when you were 6 years old.”

“Satoru nii!” You paled, blood draining out of your face, but before you could open your mouth Utahime consoled you. “It’s okay. It’s kept top secret… well as much as a secret can be amongst the Jujutsu school leaders and higher ups. Don’t worry, we understand your situation.”

You just nodded, still as white as a sheet. ‘They know, oh gosh of course they know!’ you thought with horror.

“Okay, now nobody should give you any trouble. Just relax, you’re not forced to give out any info to the other students if you don’t want to. It’s okay,” She pushed you back into the classroom where the other students were chatting.

“Haiiii, let’s start class now.” Utahime called out to which you all responded with a “Yes sensei.”

◇◇◇

Everything started to calm down and settle at school for you after that day.

Most of your time was spent in the classroom with regular subjects. But then you’d have the added physical training and cursed energy management with Utahime sensei, which you always looked forward to the most.

“Okay, time to form pairs now. Mai and Y/n. Miwa and Mechamaru, try to disarm and pin down your opponent if you can. Y/n go easy on the others.” Utahime sensei spoke, to which of course you agreed to.

Amongst the first years, both you and Mechamaru seemed to be the most capable, proficient even with long range techniques.

Mai and Miwa were weak in close combat quarters when they were disarmed. And it was too easy for you to disarm them with minimal cursed energy, as you spent a lot of time sparring with your older male cousins.

“Hup!” You closed in on Mai and kicked the gun from her grasp before flipping her body and pinning her to the ground. Mixed martial arts definitely comes in handy.

“Ouch, she said to go easy on me Y/n. You’re still pretty rough.” Mai spat out. “Get strong now or you won’t last on the battlefield. You have to focus on surviving.” You darkly said. Mai was shocked at that since you were always so bright and cheerful.

But everyone else noticed that whenever you were training, (whether it be by yourself in your free time or sparring with the others during class) you seemed like an entirely different person. Cold, calculating, detached, strong and fierce.

But of course, you always did your best to help them improve. “Mai, you’re moving your body wrong. Stabilise your footing, then aim. If I come close to you from the side, try to hit me based on your peripheral vision quicker.”

Truth be told, she improved. “Thank you y/n. You seem familiar with martial arts. Do you do any?” She asked you during break time.

Mechamaru and Miwa listened in, facing you curiously. The entire school is now aware of your Special Grade status, but everyone was still shy to outright ask you about the full details of how it was granted.

“I do. I’ve grown up sparring with my older male cousins all the time. Mixed martial arts, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and Krav Maga. Not sure if you guys know of Tsuchimikado Hiroki? Graduated from Kyoto Jujutsu high a few years back.”

“I’ve heard of his name in passing, but I don’t know of him. Your clan is kept pretty well under wraps after all.” Mai said. You smiled and nodded.

You were set to spar with Mechamaru after the break. This is where it got interesting. You activated your technique for the first time since training started as he shot laser beams at you.

He did everything he could, but even with his sword options, and strongest bursts of cursed energy, nothing hit you while you stood in the same spot.

You had activated your cursed technique, and made the space around you warp, making the attacks bounce off. Mechamaru had pretty solid power, but it wasn’t enough to rock you.

You held out one hand, “Enhanced gravity: Output level 5%” and Mechamaru’s body crumpled against the ground. You increased the air pressure above his body until he shouted, “Give!”.

You released your technique and thanked him for the fight. Mai and Miwa had stopped sparring to watch the both of you.

“Wow.” Miwa said with sparkling eyes. “No wonder… she’s special grade.” she whispered.

To be honest, at the end of the day labels and rankings meant NOTHING to you. You wanted all your allies to get as strong as they can be, so that they won’t suffer during missions.

Which is why you openly offered advice and help when they needed it. You’ve had enough of loss.

◇◇◇

When you had your free time you made your way to the library as was planned. You had a list of topics to burn through. Past lives, shared visions, alternate worlds, future visions… and the topic of soulmates. You had to get to the bottom of whatever happened between Noritoshi senpai and you.

The Tsuchimikado clan did have its history and legends as well. You had information on the other big 3 clans and their techniques. Along with that information came the basic legends of old. Soulmates, possibilities of inherited memories, parallel worlds, and some of the most evil of curses to exist. (Such as Ryomen Sukuna).

But you were sad to see that there was a lack of books on soulmates. Only some left on alternate and Parallel Worlds. 'Is the library lacking??? Didn't expect that.' You thought sadly.

You asked the librarian about it but, "I'm sorry my dear, we only have what's there on the shelves. There's a possibility the books have been borrowed. I can check the database for you."

"Yes please, thank you so much."

"Ah yes….. Kamo kun has taken some books on soulmates, parallel worlds, foresight and Abe no Seimei. Are those any of what you're looking for?" She asked.

You felt yourself pause. Okay so you were both thinking along the same lines. Not surprising.

"Yes, I can just wait for him to return it or ask him about it then. Thank you so much that was a great help!" You bid her your goodbyes and left the library.

Not to worry, you were going to see him real soon.

Author's notes: These first few chapters focus heavily on world building to set the pace for the story. You'll see a lot more of Nori in the following chapters <3

Blood Bound: Table of Contents

[psycholojosh]

Can Burned Bridges Be Restored?

I wanted to write about a dear friend of mine back in college. I'll call her 'G' for discretion. This is gonna be a long, melancholic story, and I don't normally expect anyone to read this sort of thing, so I appreciate if you read it. Here it goes...

G and I first met in our second year of college. We were batchmates in psychology. At first, I was hesitant to get to know her and initiate a conversation because she was very much bonded with her own set of friends (who eventually became my friends too). What's funny is that we did not talk to each other that much or hung out in the first year we've known each other. The only times we would do so is when we would bump into each other at school, or if she would show up to have lunch with mutual friends of ours. But I do recall a lot of instances that helped facilitate what we called a friendship.

Whenever I would hang out with G and our friends, I couldn't help but notice how she and I have a similar vibe. We both have similar music tastes, we both like talking about anything and everything under the sun, and we deem ourselves to be part of a "street-smart minority" in our department. (Trust me, there's a lot of rich kids in that public school.) We often shared our personal stories and eventually became comfortable sharing even our deepest personal troubles and insecurities.

One of my favorite memories happened on what seemed to be a mundane day. When she and I got grouped together for a major project for our Abnormal Psychology class (along with another close musician friend of mine), we often spent time talking about it both online or after school on some days. On one day, I asked her to join me in grabbing some coffee and a snack in a Starbucks just one jeep ride away from school. When we got there, we talked about the usual non-school stuff - music, attractive boys, life plans. She and I eventually discovered new things about ourselves. And from that moment on, I treated her as a very good friend of mine.

Fast forward to a couple months later, something horrible happened. For sensitive reasons - and out of respect for her - I'll only share this much: Her loved one died. But, not in the just way, if you know what I mean. It stunned me and fellow friends of hers. And I could only imagine the pain, anger, and grief she felt when that happened. It was the middle of the semester when it happened and we could not help but be worried for her. The days following were perhaps the whirlwind of her life. Me and my friends planned, met up, and attended the funeral. When we got there, we were cautiously optimistic to see that she seemed to smile somehow. Of course, it may be because she was comforted to see us being there for her.

We could not tell much how it has also impacted her academics. But from what I remember, she would still show up to the classes we were both in. But, I never bothered prying into her performance. She was still usually around when we would have our after-school hangouts, especially since she was staying in a dormitory just nearby. We often would invite her out, mostly because we hate the thought of her being alone.

One time, we tried going out for drinks with our usual barkada. When we found ourselves disappointed because all the nearby bars were full, we simply decided to just bring the party "home" and crash at our friend's place with drinks from 7Eleven. She was also living close by G's. G and I spent the night with some laughs, games, and heartfelt stories, but we never bothered bringing up her current well-being - at least directly. It was late into the Friday night, and I personally was enjoying myself, so I felt motivated to stay the night. I had to let my mom know that I wasn't coming home that night, but I needed an excuse that she'll feel comfortable with. I took the phone call just outside the apartment room, by the elevators where it's quiet. G decided to join me there. I was struggling to find out any reason she'll be comfortable with so I just decided to tell her the truth until-- G gestured, pointing to herself. She was mouthing, "Say it's because of me." I was hesitant at first, but I eventually did when she insisted that she talk to my mom. It was nonetheless true anyway.

That moment boggled me, not because it was not planned, but because of her initiative. Even if I wasn't keen on going home that night, I was surprised she was willing to suggest that I state her as my reason, knowing how much it is sensitive to her. I thanked her for it, albeit bashfully. "Hindi mo naman kailangang gawin 'yon for me," I said. "Okay lang, ano ka ba?! Totoo naman e," she retorted with a smile. The smile. It was sweet and sincere. And in my mind, I was worried about the underlying pain she was feeling. But I just took her word for it. The night went out with happy moments still. We all slept in and decided to go home in the morning next day. Those months were a pinnacle of our college friendship. And I was happy to at least give her even the slightest bits of comfort, along with many other people who love her just as much.

Our friendship continued on until after I graduated in 2018. G had to drop a few classes, which was a telltale sign at that point that she was struggling academically for very obvious, valid reasons. But even if I left college, we considered each other as close friends. We would still see each other, but only less frequently, especially when I'm around school for certain business or special events in my college org.

My last memory of hanging out with her was back in 2019. It was her younger sister's birthday, so G treated her and invited us to a bar we were all too familiar with back in college. It was a fun night! Dancing. Booze. Music. I was even happy to see her smile again and be celebratory. Afterwards, we kept online communications, but only minimally since she and I had our own things to worry about. I was busy with my job and she was focused on getting herself back on track and finishing school.

Eventually, our exchanges became short. Even if I teased her casually about me visiting her province for a vacation, she didn't seem to respond to me anymore. "She's busy," I thought. And it sort of got out of my habit to check in on her after several ignored messages. It didn't make me mad or anything, but a little bit concerned. I just continued using the same rational I had in my mind.

Fast forward to May 2020, around the time when the pandemic had just started. There came a time that I was constantly worried about my friends and miss them very much. So day after day I checked in on my closest friends. G was one of them. The only surprising thing was that she still ignored me and it left me worried even more. Weeks have passed without a reply and I rechecked her social media account and--

I was unfriended.

I couldn't search for her account anymore in Facebook. She unfollowed and removed me from her following list in Instagram. And I couldn't message her accounts anymore. I was heartbroken - but still, not mad. In a hurry, I messaged all of our friends who were close to her. We all shared the same connection to her at that point: unfriended, unfollowed, and disconnected.

My friends and I spoke to each other briefly afterwards, hypothesizing what could have happened, and why she did that. We were left to speculate that perhaps it was in her darkest times that we were around that possibly associated us to one of her biggest moments of pain. Regardless if that is rational or not, it didn't bother me. In fact, it was my only way to reason things out.

Again, I'm not mad... but just sad. The source of comfort my friends and I shared was the idea that she was doing things for herself, and we trust her judgment. We respect her person, and love her still. When I found the opportunity to message her (since I saw the option was available again), I took the liberty to write a simple message stating what we discovered, and that we support and love her still.

And quite recently, with the surge of cases of COVID-19, I couldn't help but fall back to a state of worry for my loved ones, especially my friends. I may not be the biggest personality to most of them, but my kind of love is when life hits us all the hardest. I'm a natural worrier, so to speak. Even if I don't let my worries get the best of me, I know that they are still of use.

With optimism, I hope G realizes this as well. I hope she is doing well and keeping safe. And I hope she doesn't love us any less, because we don't. This sounds too dramatic, but we'll always love her anyway. While the odds of her reaching out again seem low, I still hold on to that small chance that we'll be speaking to each other again. Until then, I'll pick up the remaining pieces of this burned bridge and keep moving forward.

Until we meet again, G.

[collapsedsquid]

Suppose my kid’s meth habit got the best of him. He needs to come up with $100K quick or his dealer’s gonna whack him. But he’s a good kid, really! Coulda happened to anyone. So I “lend” him the money, even though he has no visible means of support and the sketchiest loan sharks in town wouldn’t give him the time of day. Now I believe in bootstraps and hard work, individualism and self-reliance. So I tell my son. “Son, you are going to pay me back every penny of that loan. You are going to work it off. I have arranged with one of my golf buddies, a guy who owes me a favor or three, a job that pays $200K a year. You’d better show up every day at 9 a.m. and sit behind that desk, and get me back my money!” And he does! After a year, he’s made me whole. What a good kid.

No bail out, right? He paid me back every penny! Worked it off!

Bullshit. The opportunity I provided him, the $200K job that he would not have received without my intercession, was a huge grant. On the open market, if I were to accept bribes from the highest bidder to wangle the job from my friend, that opportunity would be worth more than the $100K advanced. I paid my son’s loan with my own money. I just obscured the cash flows, so my son and I can pretend and sustain our mutual self-regard and our righteous disdain for the moochers and the hippies and the riff-raff.

After assuming the banking system’s downside risk, the US government engineered a wide variety of favorable circumstances that helped banks “earn” their way back to quasi-health. The government provided famous and obvious transfers like unwinding AIG swaps at 100¢ on the dollar. It forced short-term yields to zero and created an environment in which medium-term interest rates would be capped for several years, granting banks a near-risk-free arbitrage for a while. It emitted trillions in excess reserves on which it continues to pay interest. It forewent investigations and prosecutions that by law it should actively pursue, and settled what enforcement it could not avoid for token fees. Then there are the things conspiracy theorists and cranks like me suspect but cannot prove: that the government and the Fed have been less than aggressive in minimizing their costs when they or entities they control (AIG, Fannie, Freddie) transact with large banks, that they have left money on the table where doing so could be hidden in arcane accounts or justified as ordinary transaction expenses and trading losses. Large banks have enjoyed some rather extraordinary results for allegedly efficient markets, quarters with large trading profits and no or very few losing days. Government housing policy is pretty overtly subject to a constraint that interventions must not provoke loss realizations for banks carrying bad loans at inflated values, or interfere with servicing revenues. (If you think I am overconspiratorial, I’m still waiting for an innocent explanation of this, from 1991.)

Hyman Minsky famously described crisis stabilization as a two-step process: First, the state/central-bank steps in as lender of last resort to halt the panic. Then the state must underwrite a program of massive deficit spending in order to “validate” — Minsky’s word — the fragile capital structures and the “innovative” business practices that proliferate during periods of tranquility.

Translating into current buzzwords, when the trouble begins there is a solvency crisis. It is converted into a liquidity crisis ex post by a firehose of net spending by the state. The current crisis has followed Minsky’s script perfectly. Banks’ ability to “pay back” bailouts has depended upon continued regulatory forbearance, tacit expectations of support if shit hits the fan again, and massive government debt issuance which resuscitated assets that would otherwise be worthless.

But who has lost anything from the bailouts? Wasn’t it a win-win? This all sounds very abstract. Where are the transfers?

If the government borrowed or printed a trillion dollars and gave the money to me, would there be any losers? If you don’t think there has been a wealth transfer, if you don’t think ordinary people have lost, please call your Congressperson and ask her to cut me a trillion dollar check. In some abstract sense, this policy of giving me money would push government debt higher. But that is so very vague a cost! I promise I’d do great things with a trillion dollars. My ideas are so much cooler than Goldman Sachs’, despite all the wholesome commercials they are running.

During the run-up to the financial crisis, bank managers, shareholders, and creditors paid themselves hundreds of billions of dollars in dividends, buybacks, bonuses and interest. Had the state intervened less generously, a substantial fraction of those payouts might have been recovered (albeit from different cohorts of stakeholders, as many recipients of past payouts had already taken their money and ran). The market cap of the 19 TARP banks that received more than a billion dollars each in assistance is about 550B dollars today (even after several of those banks’ share prices have collapsed over fears of Eurocontagion). The uninsured debt of those banks is and was a large multiple of their market caps. Had the government resolved the weakest of the banks, writing off equity and haircutting creditors, had it insisted on retaining upside commensurate with the fraction of risk it was bearing on behalf of stronger banks, the taxpayer savings would have run from hundreds of billions to a trillion dollars. We can get into all kinds of arguments over what would have been practical and legal. Regardless of whether the government could or could not have abstained from making the transfers that it made, it did make huge transfers. Bank stakeholders retain hundreds of billions of dollars against taxpayer losses of the same, relative to any scenario in which the government received remotely adequate compensation first for the risk it assumed, and then for quietly moving Heaven and Earth to obscure and (partially) neutralize that risk.

The banks were bailed out. Big time.

This piece was written in 2011

[blue-shaded]

Hey Dolphin anon! While I respect your opinion, I disagree on some points. I don’t know where the popular sentiment that he doesn’t denounce his stans’ toxic behavior came from but he’s said multiple times that he denounces it (https://twitter.com/PooGnf/status/1399592255657156608/video/1 ignore the user lol :) ) and that’s just what he says on Twitter. Some of it yeah is a little more lighthearted, like when he talks about Detective Dream in some of the tweets, but I’d say that a fair amount of those tweets lack sarcasm and are said in full seriousness. In addition, he’s also said not to send hate on his behalf during multiple of his own livestreams, he said it when he went on Kaceytron’s streams, he said he didn’t condone toxic behavior during Kavos’s video, as well as multiple times throughout various drama like the speedrunning situation and the John Swan situation (for Blue and others, John Swan is a commentary youtubers who basically did a lot of weird shit, who Dream worked with in the past and had a bad experience with. man imitated Dream’s discord profile and pretended to be him while sending sexual things to a minor, and then tried to blame everything he did on his 12-year old neighbor when he got caught, saying he left his computer open and that that neighbor got on Discord and was the one who did all that weird shit. Obviously false and got proven false, but even when Dream was debunking the situation on stream, he said not to send hate). He’s said it multiple times and I agree that he should continue to say it as he continues to grow to remind both new and old fans but he’s said it multiple times and at this point, anyone who Is still sending death threats is aware that it’s wrong and that he doesn’t support it and they just don’t care. I personally think that behavior is disgusting and I know most of the people I interact with on Twitter do as well. At this point, it’s just sort of a question of to what extent do people want him to say it. The most recent time he denounced death threats was on May 31st both on Twitter and on stream, and he’s probably said it at least once a month almost every month since like December, so he says it quite a bit, so going further would be personally DMing each toxic person he sees and telling them to stop which. I just think is a little absurd. I know that others want him to post a video on his main channel about it and condoning it as well, but I sort of disagree? While death threats can be sent on any platform, the platform on which people receive it on the most is Twitter. Anyone who’s obsessed enough to send death threats is going to be following him on all socials so they’ve definitely seen him condemning it as he’s tweeted saying that he doesn’t support that type of behavior multiple times, but of course, others are allowed to disagree with me on that, I just think that it’s hard to find a good course of action past that. I agree that toxic behavior should still be called out, but I feel like a lot of people advocating for him to do it more than he is now kind of don’t understand how out of control toxic behavior is and how they rarely listen to creators themselves.

The speedrunning stuff I kind of agree on, though I’ll just go a little more in depth about the situation. basically, for those who don’t watch Dream’s videos, dream codes mod videos for Minecraft and these mod videos would consist of things like “Minecraft but everything is dark” and “Minecraft but we can only see one chunk at a time”. Now because Dream still runs the dream SMP and did speed running at the time he had to move these mods out of the mod folder in order to do everything else that he was doing when he wasn’t recording videos. This would later on lead to the problem where the speed run moderators would ask for his mods folder and he wouldn’t be able to provide a full copy because he had since moved stuff around because it had been a week after the actual speedrun streams they were inquiring about. The thing that ended up being the problem was a recording mod that Dream had asked a separate developer to create for him and the Dream Team in order to make their recordings smoother. that was sort of it there weren’t any specifics given, he just wanted recordings to be better. Now because it was just for recordings and since the mod ran well dream didn’t ask the developer for the specifics of what they coded into this recording mod at the time. In his mind this recording mod sort of just clean things up visually. And for those who have never really played Minecraft, what I mean by that is if you press F5 in Minecraft you get a whole ton of information on your screen about coordinates and computer specs. When people say that the mod cleaned things up visually, they mean that all of that irrelevant information that clogs up the screen in a video was minimized to just coordinates. he was wrong in this assumption, the Recording mud also included coding that allowed for better trades. again for anyone who doesn’t play Minecraft, Dream and the Dream Team record their videos in the 1.16 version of Minecraft. In this version of Minecraft, it’s a widely used tactic to use piglin trades to get ender pearls. Since their videos aren’t just about beating the game regularly, there’s usually more of a focus on fighting or the specific mod that they’re using for that video, the developer increased the likelihood of ender pearl trades with pigeons in order to make recordings go faster. Regardless of that and his misconception of what the mod actually did, Dream didn’t believe it mattered because there was no record of him having loaded that recording mod during the speedrunning streams in question. This is because Dream uses something that a lot of speed runners use, he uses Fabric. Fabric API is something that both allows your Minecraft to run smoother (which is why a lot of speed runners use it, it’s approved to be used by the speed run moderators) and for those who wish to do so, it also functions as a mod loader. So when I said that he had no record of him having loaded the recording mod, I mean that when he checked the logs of Fabric API, it said that the only thing loaded was Fabric itself. this was inherently a wrong way to go about it because the way Fabric API logs work is that you have to be searching for a specific mod, so you can’t just look at what the log says is loaded on because sometimes the logs don’t show a mod unless you specifically ask the program to look for it. Dream figured this out a couple months ago, he went back through the logs, talk to the developer who coded the recording mod and got confirmation that yes, he did have the recording mod on and yes, the recording mod does increase ender pearl drop rates. He recently wrote a pastebin that has since been taken down by the pastebin staff though screenshots of it are still easy to find. I do wish that he had come out about this sooner because he knew of this information for a couple months before openly sharing, but I do get the situation has sort of faded and that he wasn’t excited to re-open that discussion when he himself had gotten a lot of hate and the threats during that situation.

Obviously as outsiders looking in we will never know how genuine he’s being, if he’s telling the truth, but I choose to believe that he did feel as bad about the situation as he said he did because for a lot of people who do consume his content, it’s been very noticeable within the past couple months that he’s been a lot less active both in terms of streaming and just interacting with the community, but of course, it’s all just personal interpretation and we will never actually know. 

Just wanted to explain the situation fully because people who may not play Minecraft and understand it the developing behind it may not understand how he could’ve possibly not seen the mod or not have a copy of the mod folder. I would disagree with you on the point that the controversy around Dream’s speed runs has delegitimized the rest of the speed running community. As someone who still watches well-known speed runners like Bennex and Illumina (TapL and Punz if they count as well), I don’t think any of them have really argued that they think that situation has delegitimize them, though I guess you could argue that they simply haven’t spoken up because they’re a little too afraid to speak up against a big Youtuber, which is fair. But as someone who has spoken to a lot of people who have sort of slightly read up on the situation without actually caring about Minecraft or Dream, none of them have said that they think that the speed running community is not legitimate because of it. Not to sound flippant because I do like watching speedrunners (albeit the already more popular ones) or anything, but the Minecraft speedrunning community isn’t exactly very mainstream, not very many people care enough to actively oppose it or say that they’re not legitimate, from what I’ve seen it’s either just you support the community or you don’t care. Even people who actively thought that dream cheated from the beginning, never used that to discredit the rest of the community (at least from what I saw). They simply didn’t care. anyone making that argument is sort of ridiculous, before the 1.16 speed runs that got investigated, Dream already had a couple official speed runs on his YouTube channel. At the time they were posted, they were approved and legitimate (though I believe one’s been taken down now), so it’s not like even Dream’s entire time in speedrunning was completely falsified, so anyone using one situation to delegitimize a whole community is being a little ridiculous. In addition, anyone who actually knows and cares enough about the speedrunning community to try to claim that all of them aren’t credible, would know that a lot of the speedrunning community didn’t even like dream all that much, even before the cheating out allegations, and they didn’t really associate with him, so they would know the Dream’s actions don’t define the entire community. If you’re talking about Dream’s more general fans, like those who watch his YouTube who may now be skewed against the speedrunning community, you can look at comments in his community tab on his channel and see that people aren’t actively against the speedrunning community, they just say they don’t care and they want it behind them which is very different from thinking that they are all illegitimate. Though if you have substantial proof of multiple cases of multiple people being biased against speedrunning community and believing that they’re all cheaters after Dream’s situation, I’d be open to see them.

I also disagree with your point over Dream being a “professional speed runner”. He says this in responses to claims that speedrunning is a huge part of his career. And he’s correct when people talk about dreams achievements, none of them really talk about speed running that much it’s always about the SMP, his manhunt videos, and his coding videos. He’s not a professional speed runner in the way Illumina and Couriway and Bennex are. His career isn’t based on professional speedrunning. Citing the Minecraft manhunt series as proof that he’s a “professional speed runner“ is definitely a little skewed and ultimately wrong. If you tried to claim those as official speedruns, the moderating team would likely have a little laugh and then reject it. Yes, he has speed runner in the title and yes in a way, it is a speedrun because he is trying to beat the game as fast as possible, but more so he’s trying to avoid being killed by his friends in the game so it’s about both speed and being smart. Everyone within the speed run community and a lot of those outside of it would know that being chased down by your friends during the game isn’t a real category in Minecraft speedrunning and therefore the Minecraft Manhunt videos aren’t official speed runs. So people claiming that dream is an official speed runner and that that’s his career is ultimately false, which is what he was saying. His official speed runs were all done for fun and have never been the main focus of his content.

When you say that the legitimacy of the speedrunning community was called into question, I will admit, I’m unsure if you’re talking about the community itself and the people with in it, like the actual speedrunners, or if you’re talking about the moderator team or both.  I will admit, even as someone who hyperfixates on Dream, his initial reaction to the moderators video saying that he cheated was godawful. for Blue and others who aren’t as into this and don’t know, basically the gist was he was lashing out and saying it was total bullshit and calling them idiots. He has since deleted that tweet and apologized for it and admitted that it was incredibly childish and impulsive. While I do get why he was so mad since the video had blindsided him after weeks of radio silence from the moderators and as a kid who didn’t finish high school he didn’t really understand the statistics that were being said in the video and since at the time he genuinely didn’t think that he cheated (a lot of people have said that all this combined led to heavy RSD which is why he lashed out like that), I still think that he could’ve handled the situation a lot better.  on the other hand I think the moderators could’ve handled this situation a lot better as well. I don’t want to talk about the whole moderator team but I do want to talk about specifically Geosquare, who is probably the most talked about moderator when it comes to the situation. Dolphin anon, if you’re talking about the legitimacy of the moderator team being called into question, I’m assuming the situation surrounding Geosquare is likely what you’re talking about, which is a slightly different situation from just the speedrunning. So for Blue and others, before the video talking about Dream cheating was released, Dream had been told that there were people on the moderating team who didn’t like him. Knowledge of this bias is also a part of what caused Dream to lash out more in his initial reaction (though again it doesn’t excuse it). The biased moderator in question turned out to be Geosquare. This was heavily proven later on in about March of this year, where Geosquare played a large role in spreading the video of fake ‘dream’ saying the n-word. Geosquare was a speedrun moderator, he Has investigative skills and he got called out for spreading that video without doing any sort of investigating because it was clear to a lot of people that the person in the video wasn’t Dream. There were multiple things that made this video seem not credible, all of which easily could’ve been found by Geosquare.

Firstly, antis of Dream had been saying since January that they were going to try to find a way to accuse Dream of saying the N-word whether that just be through spreading rumors or faking a video or whatever else. Secondly, the video really sounds nothing like dream. Now I will say this video that the clip of someone saying the n-word was from 2016-2017. I’m not saying the video was fake, I’m not saying that someone somehow predicted that Dream was going to become a big creator or time traveled and went back in time to set him up for that. but the most common theory is that and he simply did go looking back through old Minecraft videos in order to find something incriminating. Both the creator of this video and a friend of the person who was saying the N-word in the video have since explained this.  so basically for blue and others, Dream has not always on the Minecraft username Dream. He got it from someone else. And so the person in this video is called Dream. Since it was a while ago the timeline’s a little fuzzy for everyone and it’s unsure if this video occurred before Dream got the username or if it occurred after Dream got the username and the people within the video simply still called the person in the video Dream because that was what they were used to calling them. The clip’s a little too grainy to see the usernames and the video has since been taken down by the original poster. Either way, two different people. Geosquare has since admitted that this was bias on his end and that he apologized to Dream and that they’re all good and has given an apology to the black community for using the n-word as a weapon for his own bias and he has since stepped from the speedrun moderating team. so dolphin anon, when you’re talking about the legitimacy of the community being called into question if you’re talking about the moderating team, yes, you’d be correct, it was called into question, but I would say for valid and good reasons because it ultimately was biased (though again, doesn’t change that Dream was the one in the wrong in the speedrunning situation w how he initially reacted).  I don’t want to fully blame Geosquare and say that it was completely obvious it wasn’t Dream or make it seem completely obvious to you guys, because things like mic changes and puberty do exist, so I’ll give the clips and allow you all to decide for yourselves.

The clip of someone, accused to be Dream, saying the N-word: https://twitter.com/Tommathyinnit/status/1375395156791336964/video/1 (I am not entirely sure which speaker is being accused to be Dream, which was sort of the first indicated to me that it probably wasn’t him because I don’t think peoples voices change That much, but I think he was being accused to be the person who was saying “well you can bring your friend...”) Again, this video is from 2016-2017.

A clip of Dream talking, also from 2016-2017: https://twitter.com/Onciescumbucket/status/1357440678909923335/video/1 (okay so. again ignore the user 😭 but it’s confirmed to be Dream by the fact it does sound like him and his long-time friends Sapnap, who used to go by PandascanPvP, and BadBoyHalo being in the video. I believe the video has captions so even for those who don’t know Dream or what he sounds like, it’ll tell you which one’s him and you can compare that voice to the one in the other clip)

But yeah. aaaaa I’m sorry for such a long submission, I’m hyperfixated on Dream and the Dream Team, though I do understand that there are legitimate criticisms on all of them and that no one’s required to like them, and people don’t need real reasons to dislike them because people are allowed to dislike whomever they want. Definitely not any hate towards you dolphin anon, I think that you do have points, I just wanted to express my disagreement with some of them and it’s nice that you do acknowledge that the toxicity goes both ways for both stans and antis. I think a big problem is that a lot of the creators who condemn or speak against Dream (people like Slasher and Noah Hugbox and Kavos) don’t openly condemn the toxic behavior of their own fans as much as Dream does, so it becomes a very hypocritical cycle where they’re making videos about the toxicity of Dream stans and yet their own fans send death threats to Dream and his community. And since the death threats towards Dream come from multiple different fanbase rather than one centralized fanbase the way it is if toxic people from Dream’s community are attacking someone, he can’t really pin it on one person and ask them to denounce their fans so it just becomes a thing where he’s both receiving a ton of death threats while being asked to denounce death threats towards others when there’s no one really denouncing death threats towards him, which is just discouraging for his community to see, but that’s just how the Internet is, I suppose. Again, no hate to you dolphin anon and I’m sorry if any part of this came off as such, and again Blue, I’m sorry for such a long submission

MY GOODNESS WHAT A SCROLL Not gonna read all of it cuz its clearly dedicated to my dolphin anon.

[ironxkid]

👨 = What’s your muse’s relationship with their father, what made it that way?

Family Headcanons

((dfgjdghj I was literally just talking about this to my best friend yesterday xD

so, Carter’s relationship with Tony is... messy, tbh - and, I just wanna make a disclaimer again real quick, this is just going off of Carter’s general canon and can absolutely be different if plotted otherwise with Tony muses!

Carter absolutely adores her father - no doubt about that. And she always has! She loves him dearly, and it was definitely a blind adoration for him when she was little - he was still the self-destructive mess we see in the movies, but he managed to keep her sheltered from it all. Honestly, that... all began to fall apart when she was 11, shortly after her father was kidnapped

her inability to communicate was something she absorbed from her father. She developed severe separation anxiety when he returned home, and became codependent on him during this time - while the separation anxiety was something she was able to curb and basically free herself from it completely, the codependency... is still an issue, and something that definitely plays a role in why their relationship is messy

the reason why things began to fall apart, was because of said codependency and separation anxiety. Upon returning home, Carter was practically glued to her father’s side - because of that, she began to see his flaws. She began to realize he was not the perfect person she had fully believed him to be, and began to see his self-destructive behavior. At first, a lot of that was covered by him working on the Iron Man suit, and it all came crashing down when he went back to Gulmira to destroy as many of his weapons as he could

I’ve actually been meaning to write something for this, but Carter overhears Tony telling Pepper, “There is the next mission, and nothing else.” 

and that is something that continues to haunt her. She needed her father (she still does, but far more then), and to hear him say that, with absolutely no regard to her or Pepper... really messed her up. She never said anything about it to him, of course, and she still loved him dearly, but it changed something in her - she began to realize there was so much to him that she was overlooking, and it just continued to go downhill from there. The communication became an even bigger issue when she learned Tony had been dying from Vanko - when he’d called Tony and Tony said he sounded good for a dead man, which prompted him to throw it back at him, Carter was there. She heard the entire exchange because she was sitting next to her father, and it did shake her trust in him temporarily 

but, the biggest issue that carries on as she grows older is her codependency and inability to communicate. She... went through a lot, privately, at school that she refused to speak of to anyone, even though she needed to (especially given that, with one of those events, the school had more or less gotten Tony involved), and although her trust had been fully restored in her father, she couldn’t get herself to tell him. She knew there was so much he was going through, that she didn’t want to add to it - she didn’t want to become a burden. It’s also the reason why she never told him just how bad she’d gotten during the events of IM3, because she didn’t want him worrying about her stability and she was far too ashamed of how low her mental state had plummeted

I feel like this is getting dangerously close to suggesting that Tony’s to blame, so I want to clarify this now: a lot of this is fully Carter’s own doing. They’re similar in many ways, and, unfortunately, it does include being self-destructive. Carter has put herself in a position, something she is fully aware of, that has ultimately led to her being stuck in her father’s shadow, and she’s choking on it. She won’t say anything to him, won’t do anything to help herself, and won’t even talk about it to her therapist - unfortunately, that is from her inability to communicate, which did stem from her father. So, in that regard, Tony is, inadvertently, to blame for that, but the rest is on her

anyway, her keeping herself in his shadow, and ultimately seeing herself as an extension of him and not her own person, has ended up straining their relationship. She won’t reach out to him for help unless she feels like she has no choice, but it’s also made her becoming his champion, albeit... rather reluctantly at times. She knows he’s a good man deep down, and she still loves him dearly, but she feels like she has to defend him when people try to rip into him, even if it’s on a matter of his own doing, and it takes a toll on her. There’s only so many times she can run in circles insisting he’s good while he does something that suggests otherwise, and she knows it

and there are times where she does get angry with him. With AoU, there’s an obvious tension between them - she’s angry that he’d built Ultron in the first place without talking to anyone other than Bruce, especially considering he used the very thing that had mind controlled Clint and so many others thanks to Loki a few years prior. She doesn’t understand why her father went to that extreme, and with him shutting her out, it doesn’t do either of them any good

going backwards a bit, in regards to what I mentioned in the headcanon of her relationship with Maya, there is an underlying fear of Carter’s that, maybe, her father doesn’t want her. That he took her in out of obligation, and her shutting herself down around him is her way of minimizing any risk of him regretting his decision or resenting her. What she fails to see (despite wanting to believe it true), is that that isn’t even remotely the case at all, and it’s just something else she unintentionally is hurting herself with. Mix that with her codependency issues, where she needs him to be able to remain steady, she’s going to do everything in her power to keep herself in the background and keep the appearance of someone far more put together than she actually is

it’s just... Carter feels the need to try and protect him, and actually, another huge reason for that stems back to when she was 11. She had seen Obadiah rip out Tony’s reactor, and she had fought him in a futile attempt to save her father - in hindsight, she blames herself for not staying hidden. She knows, had she done so, she would’ve been able to get the other reactor to her father much sooner, and believes she would have been to blame had her father died that night. She feels the need to make up for that, even if it ends up wearing her down

however, Tony is the first person Carter is going to turn to if she ever needs someone else there for her. She trusts her father and still loves him dearly despite it all, and there is a part of her that still looks up to him. She enjoys helping him in his workshop when she can, and he was the one who had gotten her fully invested in astronomy, because he had seen her interest in it and encouraged her to chase it. He was the one to teach her about the different constellations and the stories behind them, and had supported her after she’d dropped out of college the first time around when she was 17, even though she had believed he was going to be majorly disappointed in her. He means the world to her, just as much as she means the world to him

[poisonepel]

a final pre-release analysis

khjhdjkgn so I got an ask about who I think lilia/silver/sebek are based off of, and I threw my dork glasses ON n accidentally wrote abt all the boys instead 🤡🤡🤡

There’s been talk about this ever since the first dorm came out, and I’ve read & posted theories throughout the months as well, but now that we’re in THE FINAL MONTH, here is my last compilation of thoughts regarding the relationship between the twst boys and their “counterparts.”

I didn’t want to clog that Diasomnia ask with all this extra dorm talk, but pls enjoy my twst essay here even though it’s just word vomit--

SO

Since there is so much vagueness regarding who several of the characters are based off of, I’ve come to the conclusion that maybe they just don’t have direct counterparts.

I’ll probably be proven wrong, because we saw in the previews during the Abema TV livestream that the loading screens do reveal who each character corresponds to:

But since they haven’t confirmed much for the side characters officially yet, except for the fact that they’re based off the “villains’ world,” I’ve taken this as “the villains + their surroundings (which includes their supporting/foiling characters of course, but also just character dynamics in general).

In the case of Scarabia/Aladdin, we know Jafar as the royal vizier who is secretly plotting to overthrow the sultan. This makes perfect sense for Jamil. True, he’s not the dorm leader, but isn’t that the whole point of Jafar’s story? He’s going to overthrow the dorm leader.

So then, does that mean Kalim was inspired by the sultan? Even though technically he should be considered a villain too? I think, if at all, he’d be better described as “the sultan to Jamil’s Jafar” rather than just “the sultan” himself.

Kalim has quoted references from both the sultan and the genie so far, neither of which were antagonists in Aladdin. And personally, he emits Prince Ali vibes to me as well. All three of these characters acted as foils to Jafar.

But that doesn’t explain why someone hypothetically based off of “good” characters is attending a villains’ school. You’d think some villainous attributes would’ve shone through by now, but literally nothing we’ve seen of Kalim has looked “bad” in any way.

I think Kalim isn’t intentionally a villain. But as of now, his faults are most prominent in his relationship with Jamil. It’s canon that Jamil’s family has been bound to Kalim’s for a very long time, and Jamil basically grew up as Kalim’s servant. While this definitely reflects the sultan/vizier dynamic, it also reflects a genie/master relationship. Unlike Jafar, who was working for the sultan voluntarily (albeit with ulterior motives), Jamil doesn’t seem to have a choice in the matter. He just follows Kalim around, forced to do anything he asks.

I think, while Kalim might not have a direct counterpart, he represents several catalysts which influenced Jafar’s fate, and in Twst, his whole existence will undoubtedly influence the fate of Jamil in a similar fashion.

Pomefiore/Snow White is more or less obvious. Vil represents the Evil Queen, Rook represents her huntsman. But tbh, the original Disney huntsman wasn’t really that much of a villain himself. However his betrayal to the Queen was the reason she had to go out of her way to come kill Snow White herself, the reason she poisoned an apple, and ultimately, the reason she ended up getting killed by the dwarves. So the huntsman was definitely a driving force in the story, however minimal his betrayal felt at the time.

The other things commonly associated with the Queen are the magic mirror and the poisoned apple. We already know the mirror still exists and is now called the Mirror of Darkness, which leaves the poisoned apple.

I think it’d be really weird if Epel was deadass the apple itself. We can go into the etymology of his name - if “epel” hadn’t already sounded like a mispronunciation of “apple” enough, the Japanese spelling of his name エペル (eperu) has the same pronunciation as エッペル (epperu), which is used for localizing some European translations of the word into Japanese (such as Äppel in Swedish)

His last name Felmier is spelt フェルミエ (ferumie), which is the same way you’d localize the French word “fermier,” meaning “farmer.”

So tl;dr - Epel’s name means “Apple Farmer.”

I mean... somebody had to plant the tree that poisoned apple came from I guess lmaooo

In Epel’s quote, “Apples are awkward and hard to handle... Almost like...” this could imply that he’s had to handle apples for... non-typical reasons? I’m also interested in what the rest of that sentence is. Almost like... ‘they’re poisoned.’

Ignihyde is also difficult to pinpoint. If they hadn’t made it clear that this was the Hercules-based dorm, and if Idia didn’t have that vibrant blue fire hair, I never would’ve assume he’d be representing Hades. They seem like exact opposites; Hades hates the Underworld, Idea enjoys the darkness and gloom. Hades is explosive, Idea is very private and reserved.

The one thing they do have in common is that neither of them want to rule the Underworld—Idia doesn’t seem interested in interacting with his dorm/MC/helping people when needed. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t take care of his responsibilities; as he said in his admissions video, his schedule is very busy and he doesn’t have time to be idle. Hades is the same way; even though he hates it, he has an extremely strong work ethic.

I don’t think Ortho is based off of any particular existing character, but if Idia shares Hades’ trait in feeling like he’s surrounded by stupidity and no one does anything useful, maybe Ortho was built to relieve that and actually get things done. I also think he was built to take classes for Idia so that Idia doesn’t have to leave his room. And I’ve seen other theories suggest he might be Idia’s real brother, who passed away and was restored in the form of an android.

In Savanaclaw, Jack is the only one that messes everybody up. Leona clearly represents Scar, and Ruggie’s quote, ears, gluttonous personality, and last name all paint him as a hyena.

(His last name is Bucchi / ブッチ. The hyenas in The Lion King are all spotted hyenas, which is “buchi haiena” in JP.)

And then Jack’s over there being a wolf?? There are no wolves in the movie, but a wolf is a very common predator, and Savanaclaw students are said to share a common trait of being indomitable... in other words, like predators? In that case, a wolf living in this dorm makes sense. He may not have a direct Disney counterpart, but he’s not... out of place.

I talked about Diasomnia in this ask, and my conclusion was:

Malleus→Maleficent

Sebek→Crocodile goon

Lilia→???

Silver→?????

[tgbsupplementsinc]

10 Reasons 1-Testosterone is a stimulating Steroid

AAS Analysis:

10 Reasons 1-Testosterone is a stimulating Steroid

 1-testosterone (dihydroboldenone), aka DHB, may be a steroid which has been growing in popularity recently but isn't new the bodybuilding world. DHB isn't a testosterone-based compound; it's merely the 5alpha reduced sort of Equipoise (boldenone). DHB acts during a much different way than standard Testosterone or EQ. DHB is that the dihydrotestosterone (DHT) version of equipoise like DHT is to Testosterone. 1-Test is one among the foremost potent present steroids to be isolated. From 2002-2005, 1-Testosterone was being sold as a supplement until being added as a category III drug in Jan. 2005. During this short 3 yrs, a number of these supplements sold with good success albeit the oral bioavailability isn't very high. Supplement companies were using 1-Testosterone in an oil solubilized softgels attached to an undecanoate ester (think Andriol/ Lymphatic delivery) also as Transdermal solutions/gels at the time. Both of those delivery methods have some positive effects but, the injectable preparations are quite simply, simpler. In most cases, DHB is attached to the cypionate ester. There are not any legit prescription DHB injectable preparations available, therefore the only options are all from underground labs (UGL) sources. Always use caution when using anything from UGLs. UGLs aren't regulated and are available with more risk for contamination. For this text, we are getting to focus mainly on 1-Testosterone Cypionate. Here are ten reasons why 1-testosterone may be a steroid that I find to be very interesting.

 1.) DHB has an anabolic to androgenic ratio of 200/100. As compared, testosterone's A: A ratio is strictly 100 (100:100), and Deca Durabolin is rated at 125: 37, so DHB is twice as anabolic as testosterone and almost twice as anabolic as Deca. However, let's not forget that rates given to anabolic androgenic steroids (AAS) are often misleading. DHB is extremely minimally androgenic. Side effects like aggression and vital sign increase are getting to be less likely to occur than with other steroids. Compared to other compounds, DHB is taken into account very mild, but this is often all relative to the dose used. 1-Testosterone doesn't cause significant stress on the kidneys or other organs. 1-Testosterone is understood to yield lean quality tissues gains with little to no bloat with low side effect potential.

2.) DHB is extremely anabolic and doesn't aromatize, which suggests it should yield nice lean muscle gains. DHB is more anabolic than testosterone, equipoise, and Deca Durabolin. Since there's no aromatization to estrogen, there's no got to worry about estrogenic side effects like gynecomastia or water retention. Beat all, DHB are often an excellent pre-contest hormone since it'll offer you minimal water retention. 1-Testosterone Cyp is great for helping to take care of muscle while on a contest diet, might be used for a lean bulk with relative ease by running it at moderate doses, or are often used with aromatizing compounds like Testosterone, Dianabol, or MENT for an all-out bulk when combined with a diet that reflects those goals.

 3.) Unfortunately, Injectable DHB is understood to return with prominent post injection pain (PIP). This happens after the injection, and that I believe this might be since 1-Testosterone is an irritating substance on its own. This will even be experienced with a number of the transdermal solutions. The PIP may cause many to avoid DHB and miss out on the potential benefits. From my experience, the PIP seems to vary greatly from person to person. Almost like how some have PIP with steroids attached to the propionate ester. PIP also can vary counting on which underground lab is manufacturing the answer. Most ordinarily you'll find DHB dosed at 100-150mg/ml. The 150mg/ml is typically getting to cause more PIP than the 100mg/ml. to assist reduce the PIP, try diluting the DHB with another steroid or sterile oil like Grapeseed oil (sterilized). Heating the oil with a hot pad before doing the injection can sometimes help also as doing all of your injection slowly. Using less volume with each injection can sometimes help take a number of the snap at also, so rather than doing 2ml on Mon. and Thurs. you'll try doing 1ml Mon., Tues., Thurs., and Friday.

  4.) Another potential negative drawback is that the volume of oil needed to offer the user a robust effect. 1-Testosterone is extremely almost like Primobolan when it involves the way they're dosed mg/ml and therefore the volume of oil that has got to be wont to reach the specified effect. Both DHB and Primo are typically dosed at 100mg/ml. Most users notice the simplest results once they recover from 400mg per wk. This suggests you're injecting an honest little bit of this painful oil into your muscles weekly. For many, this may prevent them from using this steroid.

 5.) Curiously enough , DHB has some thermogenic properties, almost like trenbolone, mainly regarding sweating and in some cases insomnia. DHB gives very nice strength gains without hurting appetite so it is often a really nice bulker. Although it's going to share its name with equipoise or testosterone, users consider DHB more as trenbolone's baby brother. I personally desire this is often overstating the facility of DHB. Yes, it's an excellent anabolic, and that i desire it's a stronger compound than Primobolan but yet definitely milder than tren. The PIP makes it somewhat difficult to use in most cases, but I even have personally had 1-Test Cyp that had little or no PIP a time or two, and in those cases, it wasn't an inconvenience in the least to use. Meager side effects overall aside from the potential injection site pain and a small increase in blood heat. If you'll find a 1-Testosterone Cyp with little PIP that's from a trusted source, it's worth using both within the offseason and in contest prep counting on your diet and your goals. This compound could easily be implemented in either situation with great success. a bit like all steroids, DHB is suppressive, so a radical post cycle therapy (PCT) should be implemented unless you're on Testosterone replacement.

 6.) 1-Testosterone is one among the few steroids which will be taken in oral form, transdermal solution, or in an injectable preparation. As stated above to experience the foremost benefits the injectable preparation is best except for some, the transdermal 1-Testosterone are often a pleasant addition or are often utilized by women in lower doses. Here is what a number of the standard doses were when DHB was being sold as a supplement before being placed on the list as a schedule III drug. When it had been dosed orally and packaged in an oily solution in gel cap form the oral dosing was 100-250mg daily. Transdermally, 75-100mg was applied daily. I personally enjoyed the transdermal version and ran it up to 200mg daily this version is hard to return by nowadays. Starter doses with the injectable cypionate version would be 100-200 mg added to TRT dose of test. Confine mind this is often a really mild dose, and personally, I felt just subtle changes from this dose. If you won’t to running only 1-200mg / wk of Testosterone for TRT then added in 200mg of DHB, you'd probably notice a touch effect, except for a bodybuilder running much higher doses, this is able to probably get to be doubled or tripled to note truth potential positive anabolic effects of this compound. Women have used this steroid at low doses like 25mg daily of the orally. Typically, the oral dosages are prepared much higher per cap. Injectable dosing for ladies is around 10-20mg per wk. Any use of this compound by a female could still very easily because masculinizing effects.

 7.) When DHB is combined with moderate to higher doses of testosterone an AI should be used. This is often because 1-Testosterone features a high binding affinity to the androgen receptor which suggests there's an honest chance more testosterone goes to be displaced. This might very likely increase estrogen and free testosterone to above normal levels. For instance, for instance a bodybuilder.

 is using around 400-500 milligrams (mg) per week of DHB with long ester testosterone dosed at 4-600mg/wk. Some guys may use 4-600mg of Testosterone by itself with no AI (I wouldn't recommend this, but some people escape with it) but when the 1-Testosterone is employed in conjunction with an equivalent dose of testosterone more of the testosterone are often aromatized which yields a better estrogen level.

 8.) DHB does aromatize but only at a really low level. It’s not fully understood how. It’s speculated that the body could also be potentially inserting a covalent bond on its own at carbon-4. Even still estrogen related sides are usually very mild to non-existent with this compound by itself. If employed by itself or stacked with non-aromatizing agents, it shouldn't cause noticeable estrogenic side effects, like lethargy, low libido, or depressed mood. For this reason, it's an honest idea to stack some testosterone with it. Males got to have estrogen to function optimally and by keeping a minimum of a replacement dose of Testosterone in with the DHB cycle should accomplish this. The added testosterone will give the cycle another androgenic kick. The side effects aren't bad in comparison to stronger compounds like trenbolone, and are probably more in line with the side effects which will arise with Equipoise and/or Primobolan. As stated above, support supplements, blood work, and a full post cycle therapy (PCT) should be used in the least times.

 9.) 1-Testosterone may be a Dihydrotestosterone (DHT) derived steroid. I even have heard a couple of people say it's not a Testosterone base, DHT base, or 19-Nor base but something different. This is often not correct. 1-Testosterone is what DHT is to Testosterone to Boldenone (EQ). Boldenone may be a Testosterone Derived Steroid and Dihydroboldenone is that the DHT derivative of Boldenone. This is often also why it's the classic DHT type results, Hardening, Strength, little to no water retention, low to no estrogenic side effects.

10.) 1-Testosterone is often an irritating substance to the skin. This has been known to not only cause some irritation within the transdermal formulas but also the PIP which most realize it for. One other thing that I found to be interesting was that some users may experience a small burning during urination from this compound. I personally noticed I felt like I had to urinate more frequently while on 1-Test Cyp once I got over 5-600mg/wk this is often also where I noticed the slight stinging or burning sensation. It had been very mild and honestly had I not been really listening to the small details I’ll have overlooked this.

  In closing, my personal opinion on 1-Testosterone is that it is often a superb tool for bodybuilders who don't mind doing frequent, voluminous injections. It works great during a cut phase also as a lean mass building phase. Overall the side effects are relatively mild but to not be taken without any consideration. The anabolic effects are significant if you'll tolerate moderate or higher doses of this anabolic. 400mg+ is where you actually start to ascertain some changes. Do I feel it compares to Tren? No I don’t, but I do desire it works better than both Primobolan and EQ mg per mg, but EQ is simpler to use at higher mgs. The PIP is often severe in some cases and varies from person to person and batch to batch. I hope you guys enjoyed this text to shut I’m getting to offer you a couple of example setups. Here are a couple of hypothetical scenarios, this is often an example of how i might found out differing types of cycles with DHB after having used 1-Test Cypionate quite a couple of times.

  Example 1: 1-Test Cyp as a part of a cutting stack would look something like this. For theoretical purposes, here is what a cut stack may appear as if while utilizing 1-Test Cyp for a male bodybuilder : 300mg of Test prop per wk (100mg on Mon, Wed, Fri), 3-450mg of 1-Test Cyp(100+150mg on Mon, Wed, Fri), with 300mg of Tren ace/wk (100mg Mon, Wed, Fri) and perhaps a lower dose of oral Winstrol or Anavar (25-50mg) on training days only. Ancillaries: Exemestane 12.5mg on Mon, Wed, Fri.

  Example 2: 1-Test Cyp as a part of a bulking cycle would look something like this. 600mg of 1-Test Cyp (200mg Mon, Wed, Fri), 600mg of Test E or C (200mg Mon, Wed, Fri), 300mg of NPP (150mg Tues and Thurs), 25mg of Dianabol on training days.

GH- 2 IU pre-workout / 2 IU post workout

Ancillaries: Exemestane 12.5mg a day.

  LLEWELLYN, W. (2017). ANABOLICS (11th ed.). S.l.: MOLECULAR NUTRITION.

1-Testosterone (dihydroboldenone)

[matildaisautisticandproud]

April 8th - 30 Days of Autism Acceptance

April 8: What are some misconceptions/stereotypes about autism that you hate?

1. People with autism don’t want friends. Albeit this might be true to some, this isn’t true to all. Most autistics, I’ve found, want to have more friends, but either don’t know how to go about befriending people and/or people don’t want to spend time with them. Personally, for years, I always longed to have a friend who got me and that I could be open with. (I struggled to actually be myself around people my whole life and still do.) My roommate, Missy, is that friend now, but you don’t know how lonely it is going through grade school without a best friend.

Lots of other girls had besties and many of my friends had friends that they shared their most darkest secrets with; they were super close to each other. Since I didn’t know how to go about forming that connection and I am generally a reserved person, I never had that friend and it was painful. I wanted a best friend, but I didn’t know how to establish a strong connection, maintain it, and most people thought I was “weird” and didn’t really want to be my friend.

I don’t mean to throw my own pity party by saying this, but I was the person who others would one day make me feel on top of the world by including me, but then, would distance themselves once they were done with me and make me feel terrible. This constant cycle of inclusion and exclusion, interest and disinterest, was really damaging to younger me. It frustrated me and made me think the reason I couldn’t have a close, good friend was because there was something wrong with me. (There’s never something wrong with you (unless you’re a murderer or that of the like). It’s society who is in the wrong for tossing aside such a beautiful human being.)

2. People with autism can’t feel or express emotion. This statement is 100% false. By saying this, people are invalidating the emotions of autistics, which is never okay. It is true that many on the spectrum have the inability to recognize their own emotions and/or don’t express their emotions as “normal” people do, but we still have feelings. Just recently, I have gotten better at identifying what I’m feeling, but I’m still not adroit with it. Also, I think that I feel a lot more deeply that those not on the spectrum, as do many autistics. Because I don’t really express my emotions, I’ve had people say that I seem “emotionless” and “robotic” all throughout my life. I never did and still don’t think much of it; it’s just how I am.

I get scared, sad, furious, elated, and more. Just because I don’t express my emotions in a way you can understand doesn’t mean I don’t have them. My body language is just different. (Also, I’ve learned to internalize all my emotions and grievances so, no body really knows what’s going on in my head.)

3. All autistics are just like [insert name here]. As I’ve stated numerous times before, the nature of ASD is that no two manifestations of it are exactly the same. Two autistic people may share similar experiences and struggles, but autism still affects them at least slightly differently.

4. Autistics can’t understand the emotions of others and are apathetic. Many autistics actually experience “too” much empathy. Some are apathetic, but as are some people who aren’t on the spectrum. Everyone is susceptible to being apathetic.

5. An autistic person has only struggles; they’re just their autism. Yes, autism is a key part of every autistic’s life, but it is not the only aspect of who we are. I think people should focus more on what a child can do than what they can’t, overall. Sure, Mark may not be able to handle going to the mall due to overstimulation, but he is especially skilled in painting. People should focus less on faults and flaws. Just focusing on such things will make life drab and miserable; plus, people as a whole are more than just their struggles.

6. People can grow out of autism, and it is only present in children. I, along with many others, are proof that this is false. I dislike how the struggles of adults (with and without autism, ADHD, and other disorders) are ignored in society. Not all problems go away with adulthood; it isn’t some cure all.

7. “There wasn’t all this autism/ADHD/etc. stuff back in my day so, it can’t be real.” These disorders are very much real. Perhaps the numbers have been increasing, but maybe there has just been a decrease in ignorance and an increase in compassion and acceptance. Also, diagnosing has gotten much easier, and since there is more knowledge available (i.e. the Internet) than ever before, people can self-screen and then determine whether or not to be tested. The only reason I am diagnosed is because I took the time to research different disorders via the Internet and decided to get professionally evaluated.

8. “Autism is caused by one thing.” Whether this “thing” be vaccines, a gene mutation, bad parenting, trauma, etc., this statement has been proven false by science. When studying the cause of autism, scientists have found that in one person, one gene could be the contributor to the person’s autism while in another, it’s a combination of several genes. The cause is unknown, but bad parenting has been debunked. However, there is evidence to suggest that the presence of heavy metals within a person’s system may be a possible cause. (Numerous children with autism have been found to have high levels of heavy metals within their body.)

As for the vaccine statement, it is unknown whether or not they do or don’t cause autism. There was a study carried out with the goal of proving or disproving the claim, but since the data was skewed, the results are invalid. I don’t necessarily support the claim, but there is not enough evidence for either side of the argument for me to take a side. I am a neutral in this debate. Though, I don’t believe that one should risk the death of their child just because they’d rather not have an autistic child. We’re not that bad; several parents love having an autistic child.

9. Autism only affects the brain. Again, I and many others are living proof that this claim is false. Many people with autism have co-occurring conditions like allergies, food sensitivities, gastrointestinal disorders, and epilepsy. Personally, I have numerous food sensitivities and gastrointestinal issues. I haven’t gotten a name as to what is wrong with my digestive system, but I do know there is a problem given what I experience on a daily basis.

10. All autistics are intellectually disabled. All statements that start with “all autistics” are automatically false. Even if the claim doesn’t pertain to autism itself (i.e. a political belief), autistics, like other people, have their own sets of beliefs and their own lifestyles. We’re human just like you; all that’s different is how our brains are wired and the struggles we endure.

To combat this claim, many autistics have a normal to high IQ level and can excel in school. There are those who have lower IQs, but they still can excel. One’s potential to be great isn’t dictated by IQ or a disability (or an ability and/or advantage for that matter).

11. Autistic people are great at STEM (Science Technology Engineering Math) classes. No. Although I especially excel with math and loved Algebra and Calculus, not everyone does. Some of us are great when it comes to STEM courses, but others of us struggle. Not all of us are even remotely interested in STEM, as well. Some of us prefer the arts, labor-intensive activities (i.e. construction), et cetera. We all have our different strong suits.

12. All autistics are savants. Some are, some aren’t. Although we all have special interests, most aren’t savants, actually. I don’t know where I fall when it comes to being a savant or not, but I’m not some super-genius. I didn’t invent some new scientific thing when I was 12 nor did I make a groundbreaking discovery. I do want to do something great with my future career, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be worthy of stardom and fame or be labeled as a savant.

The one thing I dislike is how people dismiss the existence of savants because they hate the stereotype. Autistic savants do exist, as do non-autistic savants, and saying that they don’t is harmful. Stereotypes come from somewhere, right? Savants exist and they deserve representation and appreciation too.

13. Autistic people don’t have relationships and moments of intimacy. Yes, they do. I personally don’t want a relationship right now nor do I want to engage in such intimate acts, but others do.

14. Autism kills marriages. This myth was made widespread by the infamous organization Autism $peaks. Sure, it may end some marriages, but why marry someone who is autistic then? If you truly loved the person then, you would accept them, autism and all.

15. Nonverbal autistics are all intellectually disabled. Although some are, not all are. A handful are highly intelligent. Autism isn’t a one size fits all thing.

16. Autistic people can’t do anything on their own/will never be independent. Some autistics won’t be able to be independent, but not all. Others don’t need any support while some, like me, need minimal support. People with all sorts of aid requirements exist on the autism spectrum. Each of us needs differing levels of support; also, especially so if one also has a chronic illness, some days I will be able to be completely independent, but the next day I may need lots of external support.

17. Having an autistic child is a tragedy. Yes, autism does make things more challenging, but there’s a silver lining in it. Like every other child, autistics are capable of great things and have talents. If people would just look past the struggles, label, and faults then, they’ll see an amazing person who isn’t just a diagnosis, but a fully fledged human being.

18. Autistic people are just rude. On honesty, we are not trying to be rude when saying the truth. In our brains, it is something that is acceptable to say. Many of us thrive on being honest as our brains tend to rely on logic more than anything else. By pointing out the size of your nose, we’re not trying to be rude. Personally, I don’t really struggle with being too honest, but sometimes I do say things aloud that shouldn’t be said. I just think of it as uttering an observation; I have no rude intents. When I am trying to be rude, you will know XD.

On conversational difficulties, it’s not that we don’t want to talk to you, it’s that we don’t know how to continue and/or initiate conversations. Not all autistics struggle a lot when it comes to social communication, but some do. Those who do, we just don’t know how to go about conversing “as normal”. We can’t help it. We’re not being rude. I struggle to continue and start conversations, which has led to many people thinking that I don’t like them. If you want to have a proper, lengthy conversation with me then, you have to start it and be able to keep it going.

On eye contact, we don’t mean to seem rude by not looking you in the eye when talking. For me, maintaining eye contact is distracting, which means that my focus is being directed away from what you’re saying, making me not able to adequately listen to you. Some autistics have little to no problems with eye contact.

19. “You don’t have to stim. Therefore, you’re just doing it to annoy me.” For me, it takes a lot of courage for me to feel comfortable with stimming around you. So, by ridiculing me for doing something that soothes me, you’re furthering my insecurity about it and hurting me. People who stim do it to self-soothe and to regulate themselves. Would you rather I shutdown (go nonverbal), experience sensory overload, or even have a meltdown? I don’t think so. Let people stim. Some of us don’t stim, but it is a lifeline for some of us.

20. “You don’t look autistic.” Well, riddle me this: What does autism look like to you? Apparently, we have completely different views on what an autistic person looks like. For me, an autistic person is anyone (a friend, neighbor, family member, student, teacher etc.) from any walk of life of any religion, lifestyle, culture, etc. The “autism look” is the generic person to me. Is there a specific way we should look, though? Please tell me more about your vision of how an autistic person outwardly appears.

I could go on about this subject for hours, but I’ll stop myself here. If you want me to debunk more myths and/or react to certain common sayings/stereotypes then, please leave a message in my ask box. I really, really, really! want to write more about this topic.

[animatedminds]

Scoob! Review

Apologies: I watched the movie  two weeks ago, but forgot to write this because I was so busy doing the Dragonball FighterZ thing. But, with that out of the way...

An interesting ride. As a longtime Scooby Doo fan, it was pretty much a given that I would watch this installment by the Warner Animation Group as soon as possible, and I had a pretty good time - albeit with some issue. It’s a fun Scooby adventure, mostly focusing on Scooby and Shaggy, as they go on a new kind of adventure. It’s full of fun references, super charmingly animated action scenes, and lots of humor that actually nails the characters’ goofball antics without diminishing them as the butt of the joke - which is something the previous theatrical series was hit or miss about - which which is also hampered by the fact that it doesn’t really give itself enough time or space to really make any of those things shine.

Spoilers, but only a couple.

The first thing we ever heard about this movie years ago was that it was conceived as a dramatic retool of Scooby Doo into a out-and-out spy series, in order to set up a Hanna Barbera cinematic universe a la the MCU (which, given that they already had a shared universe they could adapt in Future Quest, hit a little hard), giving the impression that Scooby was going to be a pastiche of James Bond. It’s very obvious from the finished product that this concept was since heavily changed, but you still see it in the film. The gang is still the same-old gang - a bunch of kooky teen mystery solvers - but plotwise it’s very much “what if instead of solving a mystery, the gang just fought a supervillain?” Which, let’s be clear, is not unheard of for the franchise: see Scooby Doo and the Cyber Chase for another story that’s mostly just “fight a cool bad guy, with a tacked on mystery,” or the other Shaggy and Scooby-centric stuff like Ghoul School or Reluctant Werewolf for other movies that just plain eschew their usual setting entirely - this is a lot like those. It’s centered around the two characters’ relationship, like pretty much every theatrical Scooby release it seems, as this new challenge almost breaks their union, and the group as usual does very well in that kind of action. Faced with an army of dimwitted robots that can go from silly to terrifying multiple times in the same scene, Scoob and Shag’s typical mix of silly bumbling with surprisingly - and destructively - clever antics make for some great scenes, my favorite being a madcap chase through an amusement park that ends with them getting away on a ferris wheel that’s been knocked of its hinges.

This is very much a movie that wants to be a Hanna Barbera crossover, but is trying hard to restrain itself. As a kid Shaggy was a fan of the Impossibles (who, iirc, were once intended to get a movie as part of this universe) with models and posters that the camera never completely focuses on, you see Laff-a-Lympics on an arcade machine, references to classic Scooby writers and actors as location names (I laughed at Messick Mountain, and the Takamoto Bowl outright went over my head at first), even little things like Scooby bowling like Fred Flintstone or the blink and you’ll miss it appearance of Yankee Doodle Pigeon - and yes, Captain Caveman shows up, fully voiced by Tracy Morgan and kicking butt for a very short scene, with one of his show’s supporting characters (Dee Dee Skyes) as a prominent in this movie’s plot. There’s even musical references in addition to visible ones: at one point, the movie even orchestrates one of the classic bits of Scooby Doo background music. I was hoping for a reference to the classic Scooby Doo / Blue Falcon theme, but alas that was one nod we didn’t get.

However, this approach does work especially well with Blue Falcon - who was originally built up through Scooby Doo, sharing a timeslot, advertisement and technically a theme song, and in time has more or less become to Scooby Doo what Donkey Kong is to Mario: technically a supporting character, but able to do his own stuff every once in a while. There have been several Blue Falcon Scooby Doo crossovers in the last few years (though in terms of sheer number of references this movie’s got nothing on Mask of the Blue Falcon), and they’ve all been very fun as each show, movie or comic reinterpreted the character to fit their specific world - and this movie’s novice Blue Falcon who is kind of an egoistical loser, but turns out to have a lot to learn even from Scooby and Shaggy’s brand of cowardly bravery, grows on you even if he has kind of a rough initial landing.

Unfortunately, this is also a movie that very much wants that rigid hour and a half timeslot, and has absolutely no interest in a going a second longer - and that’s where it’s problems come in. I’ve said before that animated films have become more and more written with expediency in mind: plot points are rushed, denouements are minimized, side or even main characters might not get much utilization, and sometimes things come of as just kind of happening to the protagonists without much set-up. Even the best or the best animation companies fall into these traps at times, and this movie is a good example of what it looks like if you fall into that too much. Take the Scooby gang - Velma, Daphne, and Fred. They’re not really fleshed out that much in this movie, even if they were tweaked a bit with their new VAs - but that’s not necessarily a problem in itself, given the heavy focus on Scooby and Shaggy. What’s more noticeable is where this intersects the plot: for example - one of the better examples of what I’m talking about - the scene that kicks off the whole story. Fred, Velma and Daphne want to expand Mystery Inc, and call Simon Cowell to invest in them. Cowell decides Scooby and Shaggy are incompetent because reasons, and the two storm off. This is later framed as the gang abandoning the duo, that’s not really what happens. Once Cowell hits the scene, beyond one or two lines the rest of the gang essentially ceases to exist, and barely reacts to anything: there’s no moments with them where they seem to buy into what Cowell is saying, there’s nothing beforehand that implies that they’re dissatisfied with Scooby and Shaggy, there’s isn’t even really a status quo for what their dynamic is like. We cut straight from them meeting as kids to them having a supposed fight as adults - this is something that wouldn’t have taken a lot of time, but would have strengthened pretty much everything, from Scooby and Shaggy’s reaction to the trio’s guilt later, but is skipped over entirely. The others get very little beyond being summed up as “the muscle” (Fred), “the face” (Daphne) and “the brains” (Velma), and it feels less like expediency and more like we missed a scene somewhere.

Granted, this particular thing also runs a unique problem that the Scooby gang face. As characters who just turned fifty and who are well entrenched in pop culture, adaptations often assume you know who they already - and this movie definitely assumes you can do its work for it and establish a baseline for the Scooby gang on your own... and on that front, I suppose it does better than the previous film series, which based a lot of its humor on fandom in-jokes they poorly assumed everyone agreed with. But... there’s a degree to which every film needs to establish a baseline for that it itself to trying to do, and I think skipping this hurt the film more than it should have. And it’s hardly the only point where the need for speed cuts out the flow of the film. Scooby and Shaggy get abducted by Blue Falcon, whose assistant then promptly exposits on everything the audience doesn’t know yet about the plot so that they can just skip straight to more action - basically setting up a question and then answering it immediately without set-up. This essentially robs Dick Dastardy - definitely the best thing about the movie - of a strong introduction, in favor of, again, expediency, and it’s kind of baffling given that there’s later scenes where the rest follows the mystery and so repeats that exposition anyway. I mentioned that Blue Falcon himself got a rough initial landing, and that’s because his intro scene is just a lot of new element popping in with exposition, interspersed with pop culture references - and that exposition just stops the whole thing cold for a while. We hit again the “expects you to know” angle with Falcon himself, who is a legacy character of the original Falcon - who we never see, which raises the question of why they bothered to make him a legacy and not just a novice hero in the first place. I’ve always been a strong believer that you can introduce elements without needless explanation unless who introduce concepts that suggest explanation: Scoob and Shag being a fan of the original Blue Falcon, Dynomutt constantly reminiscing about him, and there being a full Falcon organization around which the movie pivots, along with lots of reference, suggest the need for at least a little more than we got - even if it’s just a thirty clip of the way Blue Falcon worked before Brian (the new Falcon) came along - but the movie just wants to rush past it. The entire quest on which the plot is centered it halfway through when we first encounter it, and doesn’t get any explanation at all until halfway through the movie. And then there’s little things like  Captain Caveman cameo, which just leave you wanting more.

This happens again and again, with plot points, characters, all sorts - things introduced halfway and then brushed past as though they’re not. People don’t expect much from animated movies, and stuff like this is one of the reasons why - this movie feels sometimes like it was written for tv, which is ironic given how it ended up being released. But the movies that were themselves DTV or released to TV, like Shaggy’s Showdown or Legend of the Phantasaur, the aforementioned Mask of the Blue Falcon or - my perosnal favorite - Moon Monster Madness, even tend to not have these problems themselves, because they’re more measured and precise about what they want to introduce and why. It’s great to be childish, as long you do childish well.

But now that the criticism portion of the review is done, I will say that this doesn’t hamper the movie’s desire to be fun and easy to follow, it just makes it not as much so as it clearly could have been. If you wanted more Falcon, or more Scooby and Shaggy, more Mystery Inc shenangians, more Dastardly, more adventure, more of a certain gag or humor, more of really any of the movie’s best points, you weren’t getting them that much because the movie was trying to do all of them all at once. But one the movie starts getting traction, about halfway through, that starts to fade as everything coalesces. All the characters meet, we finally know what the heck is going on, and it’s just a straight shot to the end with lots of what this movie does best: cool visuals, silly characters doing silly things, and brave characters doing brave things. Much as I wish there was more to the Captain Caveman segment, it’s one of the most visually hilarious parts of the movie, with the stark contrast of these hi-tech, modern character colliding with these explicitly more cartoony prehistoric designs and antics, and its just wonderful. Everything about Dick Dastardly’s story is great - though I was wishing for a Penelope Pitstop reference - and he even gets a heartwarming conclusion to the whole thing.

I don’t know where the series is going after this - whether they do indeed intend to make more Hanna Barbera movies in this vein. The credits teased Johnny Quest, Frankenstein Jr, Grape Ape (who according to concept art was supposed to be in this one), Atom Ant, and even a bit of Wacky Races, and it’s clear they have the love for classic Hanna Barbera to make it happen. I just hope that if they do, they go with a series who can expand this in a more concise way, with a little better character introduction. I’ve still got my fingers crossed for Future Quest.

The film is still very recommended by me. I loved it, I watched it twice, and it a heck of a lot of fun even with its hang-ups. If you haven’t seen it, there are worse ways for a parent, a kid, or just a big ol’ child at heart to spend an afternoon.

[kate837]

All Planned Out

I wrote this fic all the way through and then TUMBLR DELETED IT!!!! So basically this fic is based directly off of a scene from FRIENDS. I've been watching a lot of FRIENDS lately and realized that some of the scenes remind me of Blindspot so I was thinking of making a series of Blindspot AU fics based off of scenes from FRIENDS. Depending on how this fic goes, let me know what you think.

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Why do I always do something stupid when I get drunk? Now don't get wrong I love going out with the girls but why oh God why do I always have to do something stupid when I get drunk?! Anyways, why am I on the floor and who's floor am I on? Ok maybe I should (mentally) retrace my steps.

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"You need to let looooooseeeee! " Tasha yelled over the excruciatingly loud music.

"I'm trying! " I never really felt comfortable dancing, much less in a club with people so close to me.

"Here Jane just take my hands and follow my lead! " I did as Patty said and took her hands and followed her lead. Oh I just realized that Rich's nickname for Patterson actually caught on and that makes me about as nauseous as this horrid hangover does. But anyways, we mostly jumped around than danced but it was actually pretty fun!

Then the drinks came in.

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"My feet hurt, let's go to the bar! " Tasha yelled.

We went over and talked a little, I guess I was noticeably upset. I mean why wouldn't I be? Kurt just told me that he wasn't even at the park, right when I was about to explain why I wasn't there! That d*mn park.

"Look Jane I know it hurts that Kurt wasn't at the park, and that he said you two would be 'too complicated' but this isn't the end of the world. I promise. It's still rotating, albeit very slowly. So why don't we just forget about all of our problems and have a really fun night? I mean isn't that what girls nights out are for?" For Patterson to be so blunt I guess I looked worse off than I thought.

" You are entirely correct! Look Jane we're all a family, when one of us is sad we're all sad. We all love you and just want you to be happy so let's have some fun! " That was the first time that Tasha addressed the team as my family and it spread a great warmth through me.

"Alright let's do it!"

So we headed back to the dance floor.

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We danced for a couple more hours before I bowed out. I took a seat closest to the dance floor. It was actually more entertaining to watch them dance. But being alone with my thoughts is never a great idea. My mind went straight back to Kurt. Then I remembered what Tasha and Patty said about being sad and that plus my blood alcohol level decided you know what that guy shouldn't have the power to bring my mood down! I'm going to let him know that!

So I dialed Kurt's number.

Dang it voicemail.

"Hey Kurt I was calling to tell you that I don't care that you weren't at the park, and you don't get to have this poWeR over my mOod anymore! Because you know what iiiiiiiiii am over you! And that my friend is what they call closure! "

I hung up and joined the girls back on the dance floor.

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None of us could drive in our current state and Tasha's apartment was the closest to the club so we walked there and somehow made it home intact. And oh- I just realized that I consider Tasha's house, home and that brings a smile to my face. Anyways, in a drunken haze we had the wonderful idea of having a 'sleepover party'. We made a makeshift fort in Tasha's living room and slept on the floor. Needless to say that when we woke up with killer back aches that idea seemed less than stellar.

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I woke up first with a huge groan. I had a splitting headache and it felt like all my muscles we're strained, part from sleeping on Tasha's floor and part from dancing most of the night away.

Tasha was next. She woke up with a groan like mine and I caught her up to speed on what happened last night or what I could remember of last night (some of it was fuzzy so I figured I dreamt it). We both agreed to stay where we were until Patterson woke up, so she wouldn't wake up alone. Also, because we both knew that once we got out of this fort the morning rays would send our headaches into overdrive. Patterson woke up about a half hour later with a loud groan which made Zapata and I laugh so hard we wheezed, it seemed like we all knew each other's pain a little too well.

"Guys we have to get up, we have to be at work in about twenty minutes. Who wants to shower first?" I tried to coax them.

"I'll be right behind you once I learn how to stand. " Patterson said dramatically.

With many setbacks we all got ready for work. Buttttttt we may owe Tasha a new coffee table. Don't judge ok? We all needed support standing up and apparently three grown women putting most of their body weight on one glass coffee table isn't a good idea. It broke and sent us all tumbling back to the ground. Second was, apparently Tasha and Patty shower together. I was shocked.

" I'll make coffee and you two can figure out which one of you want to take the first shower. "

"Actually we shower together. You know to save water and stuff, FBI paychecks only cover so much. " Tasha said nonchalantly.

"Come on Jane, don't look like that. It's nothing inappropriate we just help each other wash up and get out, you could come too if you want. " Patterson grabbed my shoulder.

"Not to be rude but I'm not a very uh- open person. I think I'm my most open with you guys but I just don't think I'm quite that comfortable yet. "

"Ok next time, toots. " Tasha winked and started to laugh at my shocked face.

That was setback number two. Setback number three was the fact that Patterson and I didn't have a change of clothes and we didn't have time to go to our separate houses. With me being so tall it took a while to find something from Tasha's closet that doesn't look small on me, and Tasha has like no waist so it took forever to find something for Patterson.

We left with about five minutes to spare. Which we killed by going for a coffee run.

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We arrived at SIOC right on time. Patty was wearing one of Tasha's dull navy blue button-ups with fitting black jeans, Tasha was wearing a gorgeous lower cut, black button up with a black blazer and sleek black pants, and of course, her famous heels. I was wearing a dulled emerald green button up with sleek black boot cut pants. And of course we were all wearing sunglasses. Our attire distracted everyone from our obvious hangovers. Thank God.

We also got a lot of looks, and compliments throughout the office. Especially Patterson. The navy brought out her eyes.

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After last night, we decided to leave separately. I was still in the office well after everyone. Everyone except Kurt. Kurt and I were the only two left in SIOC. He finally got up.

"Goodnight Jane. "

I had almost succeasfully played it cool all day.

"Goodnight-oh wait did I call you yesterday?"

"Um- I don't know. I'll check. Do you not remember? " Kurt started chuckling and walking closer to me.

"Ok you caught me. Tasha, Patty, and I went out last night and had a few too many."

"Wow." Kurt started almost giggling. Which instantly made me start to laugh.

"Yeah. Are you sure I didn't call you? Actually, maybe it was a dream. "

"Ohhh you're dreaming about me now?"

"Don't flatter yourself. "

"Wayyyyy too late for that. Actually wait-"

Kurt pulled out his phone.

"Yeah you actually did call me, you left a message too. "

Jane froze. Kurt put his phone on speaker.

Hey I was just calling to let you know...

Jane launched into action and sprinted straight for him.

"NO KURT DON'T LISTEN TO THAT! "

Kurt sprinted in the other direction. They were now running in circles around SIOC.

.....poWeR over my moOd

Jane then jumped onto her desk and jumped onto Kurt's back in a last ditch effort to take Kurt's phone out of his hand. Except she wasn't entirely on his back. One of her legs was swung over his shoulder and the other was slightly dragging on the ground.

Iiiiiiiii am over you! And that my friend is what they call closure!

Kurt stopped running, and Jane stopped trying to grab Kurt's phone. She was still on his back and he didn't try to get her off. Instead he slightly adjusted her so she was properly on his back, so he was supporting her weight and the risk of her falling off was minimal.

"You're over me? " Kurt sounded so.... Hurt.

"Kurt- I- I don't know. "

She was so grateful that she didn't have to look him in the eye when she said that. She got off his back and made a beeline for the locker room. Grabbed her stuff then took the stairs out of the building. Leaving Kurt in an empty SIOC. Alone.

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She walked home and the only thing on her mind was how Kurt's voice slightly cracked when he asked her if she was over him. She walked into her safe house and was inside for a grand total of three minutes before she heard a knock on the door.

"Kurt what are you doing here-"

"Jane I'm your coworker. Not just your coworker, I'm the lead agent on your case you can't tell me that- that you have feelings for me! What am I supposed to say to that Jane? I can't deal with this! "

He can't deal with this? They're my feelings. Wait did he just come over to yell at me?!

"This isn't my fault! I didn't just wake up one day and say 'Oh hey, this is a great day to fall in love with Kurt' like what the f*ck! "

"You- you're in love with me? "

F*ck.

"I need to go. "

"Fine then, leave! "

She slammed the door, sat on the couch, buried her head in her hands and cried. That lasted about thirty seconds before there was another knock at the door. She didn't even need to look through the peephole. She knew.

No words were spoken. She opened the door and looked up at Kurt. Then he grabbed her by the waist into a searing kiss. Jane backed them into the house and Kurt closed the door with his foot to not break the kiss.

They kissed for a few minutes and just before the tension became overwhelming, Jane broke the kiss, and rested her forehead against Kurt's.

"I have to say, I'm getting some pretty mixed signals from you." Jane was laughing and slightly crying at the same time. Kurt chuckled.

"I love you too, Jane. "

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