#but we dont have to change an entire industry practice for you to do so
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I'm watching a youtube tea video about the discourse on illustrated book covers, specifically in regards to adult romance. Because they end up looking too adolescent for adult fiction and kids are reading them whatever, so it all loops in with kids reading age-appropriate books and such.
Example:
Now, I have not read this (and I might, bc even though it's plainly hetero, there is ALSO a figure skater on the front, so), nor have I read anything from this author, so this is not a commentary on the book itself.
Personally, I just don't like it. Probably because it just falls a little flat (as in, no visual depth), and maybe too pastel? But that's a totally personal take. Just not my preferred vibe.
But to say that it's ruining the children of today by tricking them into reading adult smut?
Idk. I think I'm too entrenched in the fanfic community, because I literally think that if they can read at that reading level and enjoy it, they're old enough to read it?? Sure, parents are absolutely allowed to govern what their children read, but I just remember being an advanced reader and wanting to read Practical Magic by Alice Hoffman and being insulted when my mom told me "no it has sex". Like, there's more to it than sex? (At least according the film.) But also, who cares? Not me.
Not looking to start any wars here, I'm just trying to contextualize it to myself in the greater world of the resurgence of literary puritanism and book banning. The line of what's "age-appropriate" is so twisted these days that I think it should fall to the reader to decide what they want to read. And if parents have any concerns regarding a trend they're seeing in their child reader, then it could be an opening for a bigger conversation.
It sure as hell isn't an answer of "stop doing illustrated covers!", like-- they're not AI, they're discreet, and they're cutesy. Personally, I like the old bodice ripper covers myself, but that's just me being a hipster of smut I guess.
And again, fanfiction-- if children want to lie about their age online to read an 18+ fic, they're gonna do it. It should be no different with print media. If they wanna read it, and they enjoy it-- let them read it!
#personal#no hate in the notes k thx#booktok tea#also... why do we care about this at all?#if you wanna raise your kids a certain way fine#but we dont have to change an entire industry practice for you to do so#same goes for putting an age warning on books like for movies and music#you think we hate book stickers now#just wait til its just an age warning we can't take off
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I feel strongly that jikookers must be really young or adults who are really lacking in the common sense and observational department because there's no way there's no way 😭
Imagine fighting tooth and nails and even going as far as visiting cc's anonymously of ppl who don't think the same as you to try to convince them ( more like convince yourself ) that two dudes in the kpop industry who have content after content of very common and usual fanservice, I mean almost kisses with cameras on every angel and on their faces, lots of narratives that come straight out of a company, they even be expecting eagerly their annual compilation of fanservice, the memories ( any rational adult with any idea of how the world works knows that that isn't the way a closeted gay couple would be treated when there's millions of investment in a group), also the body language (jikookers really can't read the most basic body language or they are pretending), the honest clear attraction between two other members etc, are in a relationship
They also be acting like reality is dependant on what ppl's opinion a private relationship is.....it doesn't matter what any of us think, who you try to convince or how much you try to convince yourself, reality won't change, facts won't change, our opinions don't have any influence in these people's feelings and lives, I need ppl to stop thinking with their desires and wishes and really start using their brains.....and I'm not saying this for the need to win any ship war, but bc i see how these delusions serve to harm real queer people and make their lives harder ( kpop and in this case their company has everything to do with this)
Hi @def-sowl!
Yes, absolutely! Going to rant a bit on your ask here.
What I have learned from the Jkkrs visiting my blog and from what I encounter when I look through tags... Jkkrs have a very strong focus on the 'romantic' parts of life. They allow for very little aside that. Everything Jk and Jimin do has a double meaning or they do it with the other in mind. You could so clearly see that when Jk released Seven... his clothes, his pictures, his jewelry, his lives... everything was connected to Jimin. That is not how real lives work. Jkkrs rarely think about reasons for Jk and Jimin's behavior outside the realm of romance. Jimin was unsure about his appearance so he sent Jk a selfie to show why... Jkkrs make it a naked selfie. JImin went to NY... Jkk date. Jimin doesn't talk about Jk on his lives... Jimin isn't ready/holds the ropes/whatever it was. The way they see Jk and Jimin is entirely built around the idea of them together. You can even see huge discrepansies in that, because at the moment they dont know whether to stick with the "Jkk is bold" or the "Jkk is laying low".
When thinking about the members, there's so much to take into account. They do not live normal lives for instance. I had this Jkk go on about Tae not knowing Jk's hotelroom number and how that meant they couldn't possibly be boyfriends. They do not take into account that those guys go from hotelroom to hotelroom at times, with only time to sleep at some days. It's nothing like schoolcamp or going on holiday. We as fans, cannot compare their situation to ours in the practical way. They have jobs that none of us experience, they have more money than us, they always have to be aware of 'image', they are 'being lived' at times... it's just.. we cannot relate. That doesn't mean we cannot incorporate those things when we think about how their lives might be though, and I feel Jkkrs absolutely lack in that regard.
That anon came back and showed me many tiktoks and tweets about how I am wrong and how Jkk is real (though stating they do not mean to try and convince me, they just like pointing out that I am wrong). But those vids, where all either fanservice or plain friendship. And you are right, they do not understand the subtlety of reading bodylanguage at all.
and I'm not saying this for the need to win any ship war, but bc i see how these delusions serve to harm real queer people and make their lives harder ( kpop and in this case their company has everything to do with this)
That is a very strong point you made, and yes I agree.
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I dont want to "feel good and righteous", I'm viscerally disgusted by men who watch porn and want nothing to do with them. And I'm open about it because why shouldn't I? Some things should be shamed, and this is without a doubt one of them. We've coddled men for far too long and look where that got us. I don't give a shit if he's struggling, he's getting off on the abuse and humiliation of women. Their pain matters more to me than his ever will.
Okay but as with any addiction it is a mental health issue not a moral one. You don’t treat addiction of any sort with hatred and punishment. It doesn’t work for people addicted to meth and it doesn’t work for people addicted to porn and the more shame somebody feels about an addiction the more likely they are to violate their morals believing they are already a lost cause in seeking out the continuation of their compulsion instead of seeking help. I’m also viscerally disgusted by porn but I don’t prioritize indulging my disgust over taking practical measures to ensure the safety of others because once again it is more important to reduce harm than to feel good about the state of the world or theorize about a utopia. In a perfect world, porn would not exist and people would just consume erotic art. I agree. What are we doing RIGHT NOW? How can we reduce the harm that comes to people living in our society RIGHT NOW? I’m all for a ban on porn theorybut until they put that in place how can we help people dealing with compulsive consumption? That is if it can even be legally enforced in a meaningful way that does not leave legitimate art open to censorship by the state or violate people’s right to privacy which like how do u round up all the hustler and playboy magazines without violating somebody’s right to privacy I don’t want to live in a country where the government can come into your house or search you on suspicion of having something the size of a single Polaroid. We are possibly headed into a tyrannical dictatorship, how many of your rights are you willing to sign over to them to not feel disgusted? Nobody likes to feel disgusted, there are priorities that supersede your disgust. actually doing the work to change things means thinking about more than what you wish was true. Absolutely speak out against it and discourage it and make people aware of the realities and dangers of it but how vulnerable are you comfortable to leaving yourself to state overstep in an attempt to legislate it? The war on drugs sounded like a noble idea until it became an excuse to criminalize and murder mentally ill people and minorities and imprison protestors of things like racial segregation and the Vietnam war. Until now decades after we’ve realized it has failed we cannot get the government to drop it to the point that nonviolent prisoners with good behavior are being denied bail and our nations supply of public court appointed defense attorneys is completely exhausted to the point of being entirely ineffective because they have to work so many nonviolent drug cases because nonviolent drug arrests makeup the majority of prisoners in America who make up the majority of the people being exploited for slave labor by American corporations so corrupt politicians (all of them) are being given enormous campaign donations by the oligarchs profiting off of the prison industrial complex to keep drugs illegal so they can keep enslaving nonviolent “criminals” because some people wanted to live in a utopia where addiction doesn’t exist so they jumped the gun and wound up letting cops stop and frisk them for dime bags on the fucking street. They kicked my friends door in and pointed loaded guns at him and his wife because he was selling a tiny bit of homegrown from a friends farm in Vermont a few months before it was legal in my state. How many innocent people should we let the government harass and kill and enslave so that you don’t have to feel disgust? Is your right to not feel yucky when you think of something upsetting more important than not giving the police the right to turn your house upside down and pour every drawer and jewelry box and music box and nick-nack container on your dresser and then every individual drawer looking for an item that small? Are you comfortable with people going to jail for something that easily planted when we know what cops did and still do during the war on drugs? We can make it SOCIALLY and MORALLY unacceptable to view porn but disgust is a healthy emotion and as an adult u need to cope with it.
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Lawyer seo marketing writing content tips that dont involve writing
Does it feel like your law firm’s blogs are missing something? Has your site’s bounce rate bounced a bit too high? Of the many reasons that we post content on our sites, one of the most important is to hold onto a user’s attention. Great content can do that as well as so much else. Good content, however, isn’t just in the writing. Below are some things I keep in mind when I sit down to write lawyer SEO marketing blogs, city pages, service pages, and more.
None of these tips have anything to do with writing exactly. I’m not making any comment here about your authority, your knowledge of the law you practice, or anything like that. Rather, these are some things that I’ve picked up as I’ve gone through my career as a writer for our many law firm clients.
These can work for any lawyer, yes, but they can also apply to just about anyone creating written content in any industry.
Blank Space is a Boon Which of these looks better:
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.
Or:
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat.
Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur.
Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.
– Both are nonsense, of course. They’re Lorem Ipsum. However, one is a lot easier to read, isn’t it? The second is easier on the eyes. The content is the same. But, it feels like less of a chore to read it, doesn’t it?
How This Relates to Your Writing
This can make your writing so much easier to read. No matter what kind of content you’re creating, shorter paragraphs are beneficial. Remember: a strong majority of the people coming to your site don’t know that much about the law. They may already be wary of “legalese.” So, when they see a big block of text, they may just close your page entirely.
As you may have noticed, unless I’m trying to fit a keyword into the first paragraph, I try to keep every paragraph to four lines or less.
Having smaller, easier-to-digest paragraphs is one more way that you can better engage your users. This doesn’t mean you’re “dumbing down” your content. Not in the slightest. It just means that you’re creating it in such a way that it can be easily consumed by your audience. More Words Has to Equal More Value If you’ve been writing content online for a while, then you know that the word count for how long something should be to rank online is seemingly always changing. One day, it’s 500 words, the next, 800, then 1200, and now up to 1800 or more. That’s fine. Nothing wrong with having longer pieces of content. That said, every piece of content should provide value.
Too often, when writers see that a piece of writing should be 1800 words or something, they just load it with nonsense. Some even stuff a bunch of AI into it, like a suitcase in a heist movie where there’s blank pieces of paper underneath a few dollar bills.
This won’t help you with anyone: Google or your users.
Instead, the key to writing longer pieces is to have more to say. When I have something longer to write, I don’t tend to spend more time writing. Rather, I spend more time researching ahead of time.
An Example From My Work We have a great attorney and a good man who’s been a client of ours for a long time: Belal Hamideh. The time came recently for me to add more words to one of his pages, one about Wrongful Death cases, to make it meet modern standards. I didn’t just sit down and start writing about wrongful death. Neither did I ask some AI: “Tell me about wrongful death cases.”
Instead, I looked at his page. Then, I researched wrongful death. I specifically noted aspects of the law that weren’t currently covered on his page. Also: I looked for what could be fleshed out that was already there.
That took longer than the actual writing did. Why? Because from doing all of that research, the writing was a breeze. It was easy to sit down and add those new parts because I knew exactly what I was talking about. Lawyer SEO Marketing Content and Beyond As you’ve probably surmised at this point, all of the tips I mentioned above are not exclusive to lawyers. You can use this in all of your written content, regardless of what industry you’re in. I certainly use everything I’ve said above for all of our clients.
What’s great about working for an agency, like I do, is that I’m not doing this by myself. I’m part of a team. Our team has web designers, SEO strategists, videographers, podcast hosts, and so many others. To see how we can help your law firm to reach more of your clients (or more of your customers to find your business) schedule a free consultation with us through our site or by calling.
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Lol, yeah it is getting… very long lol. Was gonna ask if you wanted to split to a new post but you beat me to it.
Pfft, people are gossiping about Wayne making a 17 year old CEO, while the people in other companies that have to meet with Wayne Enterprises are sobbing in relief. No you don’t understand that kid is the only normal person in the entire company- even if they’re not exactly right lmao. Let them live in denial.
Gosh I feel bad for Young Justice (not lol) the first time Tim (probably in a narcolepsy and insomnia-fueled rush) brings one of the living snacks to the mountain. Oh hey Robin is back! With a lobster in his hand? And some prawns but they’re more focused on the lobster- oh god he just bit its head off- And poor Tim has no clue what they’re freaking out about in his sleep-deprived haze. Oh, did they want one? (NO ROB WE REALLY DONT- Kaldur confiscates the bucket of live prawns and hugs them to his chest looking traumatized)
Oh you’re so right with Gotham knowing not to do big parties on Outsider holidays because of things like Calender Man lol. Bet the Outsider Galas include one for celebrating the GCPD (really how much they weeded out corrupted officers) and a simple spring one. Definitely an aquarium one that officially is to raise awareness for marine life, but everyone in Gotham knows it’s just an excuse to terrify Outsiders lol. I love the idea of most of the rogues being chill after a while. Like it’s an unspoken thing that they know who the Bats are- Harley went to medical school with Bruce! Harvey and him were childhood friends! He grew up seeing Cobblepot at galas before his parents death. They all know to play nice during these. Mostly. They’re still rogues & terrorize people but it’s Gotham, it’s like enrichment in their opinion. Except Joker. No one likes him. Or them. Depends on if it’s the continuity of there being three jokers or just one.
Helena is just a lil baby, she just took a lil nibble! Bruce rolls his eyes at everyone freaking out because really, it’s just a bite. Practically a paper cut, calm down.
Oh my god victorian-style punk, that’d be so popular in Gotham you’re right. It’s a mishmash of victorian, modern, 70s, 30s, 90s, practically every time period in the city, mixed or not. You think Discowing came out of nowhere? No people still dress like that and it always confuses visitors. You’d think everyone would be wearing drab and gray clothes but no. There’s so much color during the day.
You’re so right about Bruce having a wedding painting. They even used glow in the dark and reflective paint so if you shine a flashlight at it the eyes flash back, a rather common thing in Gotham to visitors’ horror. It almost looks like a fae or siren painting, their hair shimmering around them and bits of skin glittering with scales and finery if you look closely. Honestly the painting industry in Gotham is going so strong lol.
@midavalanche asked about things like plumbers and the types of jobs that require a lot of water around you. And @rulerofdumbassery is right with the full coverage near hazmat idea lol. Outsiders think it’s because of how toxic Gotham waters are, along with the fact the city is canonically full of lead still, but no it’s so they don’t use their legs lol. Y’all are also correct on water being an import. Gotham surprisingly doesn’t have a lot of imports, which people don’t realize because by all logic the city shouldn’t be able to support itself. Should be doesn’t take in aquatic curses that start taking hold the moment you see the city as Home. But Gothamites can drink water without changing (as long as they don’t spill). They might have hints of their other form from it- maybe ears a hint too pointed or sharp canines out or eye shine particular bright- but otherwise it’d be like them changing from the water inside them. And humans are like, 60% water. Lungs alone consist of about 83% water to flesh ratio. Dishwashing and other jobs definitely use long gloves and it’s habit for everyone to check for tears or damage- most people assume it's from all the rogues with chemical weapons but no they’d be pretty wrong lol.
Random unrelated thing but I think Gotham arts & crafts includes creating mini grotesques & gargoyles as good luck charms. Bruce has an entire cabinet of ones from his kids that they’re honestly embarrassed about because it includes their first attempts but he loves them.
OH! Pfft, poor Dick when he first moves in with Bruce & is fostered, because I bet it’d totally slip their mind to tell the kid about the curse because it’s been in effect for like, at least a year at that point and no longer registers as something strange per se. There’s more pressing things at the time. Bruce gets woken up at 4am by 9 year old Dick running into his room freaking out while waving a scale-speckled arm because he spilled water. (Yes he knows Bruce told him to use bottled water but that’s so much work!)
Oh poor single dad Bruce when his kids are developing their fangs and adult canines and they’re using him as a chew toy. OH MY GOD! JASON’S DEATH! JUST REALIZED! Bruce is in good standing and in a good relationship with the League. Or at least in contact enough with them thanks to the Curse and the Al Ghuls canonically having had magic users in their bloodline. (We also have canon comic panels of Ras telling Bruce he grieved for Jason’s death as well) I bet Talia informs him like, not exactly immediately, but once she’s gotten Jason’s brain damage and other things healed via the Pit. The fact that Jason sees all that he was buried with, the unspoken love and grief that is there definitely helps with his anger. But I bet they at least called or video called while he was with the League while he was figuring out how to deal with the Pit Rage. Because that shit is a chronic condition, it doesn’t just… go away. It’s part of him now, and he has to learn how to live with it- but is that not what grief is?
Ras sending assassins after Bruce’s allies: If he’s not going to join my League and makes his own I must make sure they’re worthy of his time! I’ve even ordered the Shadows not to kill! It’s only some slight maiming attempts, I don’t see what the problem with that is! (Meanwhile Selina & Talia on a date: Hm I feel like something has happened…)
Edit: I found something that has some Gotham fashion vibes here on tumblr lol
@puppetmaster13u
It was getting too long so...
Okay this was VERY long but I love it all. So much food, and very much alive when possible. And yeah they're very much venomous.
... oh gods you're making me hungry for food that isn't even safe even if it existed 😂
Also, I feel like Ivy's plants would, ah, sometimes move if they don't like where they're currently planted. If your neighbor is taking better care of your flowers then you might wake up and see them over there, you just learn to deal. 😅
Ooooo I love that. And I feel like, to Aquaman, it would be like speaking in Pig Latin + Esperanto mixed with the heaviest Scottish accent ever. He can tell it's words, but he can't really understand it.
Also, Bruce singing lullabies to the kids, just imagine. Jason or Dick or anyone shows up having a panic attack and Bruce starts calming them down. First in English, then aquatic, and slowly morphing into a lullaby.
Oh definitely, those other heroes will be struggling. Almost feel bad for them.
The medical professionals must be paid well, and Gotham University probably ends up with a very heavy metal degree that most people might assume is for vets not human doctors. 😂
Oh my gods Helena yes. Poor Supes, and I love the JL freaking out. Also, her bottle HAS to be a little pink, because of the blood that's probably in it. Also, I imagine they're born with weak venom, and drinking their parents' blood lets them process and produce stronger toxins.
I bet Dick and the other kids probably have the same weird food habits and their teammates aren't really sure what they're supposed to do. Sometimes Tim will fall asleep in the middle of lunch and whoever is in the same room will get to see his lunch run away. Probably a bit unnerving. 🤣
I like the idea they might do them for 'major holidays'. Not on the holiday, because Calendar Man (on the holidays is Gotham only, they fully expect him to show up, he's practically invited without saying anything outright), and that's the Outsider Galas. Not just one a year, but not like 20 of em either.
And yeah, aside from runaway food, Tim is pretty good with outsiders. He probably wouldn't eat 'normal' (normal for Gotham anyway) around his team if he didn't trust em or something either. This is probably another reason Bruce made him CEO. 😅
Yesss uncanny valley please. Everyone is freaking out internally, and yet at the same time they can tell they're safe... for now. Servers doing their job, and Gothamites not revealing anything, unless someone does something wrong.
Yesss the rogues. Honestly I just want an AU where the rogues are basically family.
||=====||=====||
"Oh yeah that's aunts Harley and Ivy, they can be fun but don't drink the wine."
Then (controversial I know but also heavily depends on the AU)
"That's Uncle J, we're on tense terms with him but he's got the best drinks if you don't mind letting a bit."
Maybe
"There's not-dad Harv-"
"he's Uncle T right now-"
"-that's Uncle T, don't gamble with him or ask about his coin collection unless you want to stay a while."
Or
"Don't mind Uncle Cobbles, he's a little competitive with B about their family histories, but other than that and birds he's pretty calm."
Even
"Yeah don't mind Uncle John, he's probably more nervous than you are, doing spook him and you'll be fine."
||=====||=====||
Yesss so many photos.
Also, there's two wedding photos. One he shows to outsiders, the other is up at the major as a painting and is the same wedding photo but underwater.
... Ras don't bother your son-in-law's friends please, they have enough on their plate. Seriously, stop. 😂😅
Bruce probably confuses everyone even more by knowing the assassins.
Oooo yes. Sharks, aquariums, oh my. I love all the animals you mentioned too.
... so I randomly looked up 'Victorian modern punk' because why not and...
This was the top result.
#*wheeze* h20 au#merfolk au#cryptid batfamily#I apologize for making you hungry lol (I like making small world building details like cuisine lol)#Helena's first fish is some goldfish in her aquarium that she babbles at all excitedly#Oh my god you know who should be added: Alina Kiki & Athanasia#Alina is small 6 year old who we don't know if she's Bruce's or the Joker's but he's taken her in & she's adorable#Kiki is a small child Batmite created who is practically a tiny female Bruce clone#Athanasia is Bruce's & Talia's second child#OH MY y'know who we haven't talked about#Amanda Waller- the person behind the Suicide Squad who also at one point sent them to break into Arkham to kill the Joker#She also created two Bruce clones/kids: Terry & Matt Mcginnis#I just think it'd be funny if Batman walks into a meeting all frazzled with a few more children one day apologizing because the#usual babysitter (Alfred) is unavailable (Selina is on a date with Talia *cough* animal heist *cough*) (& his kids have missions w/ teams)#But anyway someone is definitely going to walk in while Bruce is making a bottle for Helena at some point after the meeting#Horrified when he takes a bite of his arm to bleed into said bottle#I LOVE the idea of babies building up their own poison & venom from their parents- which means each generation of Gothamite#gets more and more poisonous & venomous#Which might explain why Bruce has semi-simple paralyzing & numbing venom while say Jason has neurotic & necrotic venom#Aquaman during the gala is definitely inching towards the aquariums because all the Gothamites are unnerving ur right#Like he can tell they're not like Actively being a threat but there's that tiny bit in the back of his head that screams that could change#PFFT Bruce waving to an assassin or three who wave back before disappearing & the JL is just: ?!!???????#Batman: Apologies it seems my Father in Law is being petty#JL: Your what#Love how this started with the bats messing with Atlanteans & the JL & it's evolved into a whole speculative biology & culture & world lol
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also the other day i had the most big brained idea and i needed to share it with you.
so i was thinking about how nct was very obviously inspired by akb48 (who if you dont know are a jpop girl group that have a shit ton of members, around 80 or something). im not gonna go to in depth but while akb48 has its own set of issues (fun fact, i think one of the girls was killed and ppl suspect one of the other members was behind it 💀) the infinite member thing and the sub units do have a functional purpose but with nct there's just genuinely no fucking reason for it. in akb48 the girls have a graduation system except they straight up do leave the group. there's this misconception that the girls are forced to leave when they're too old but its actually something the girls themselves choose to do when they personally feel the time is right. its kinda wholesome actually. a lot of these girls have other aspirations and the group is viewed as just a temporary thing.
nct did have a graduation system in place with nct dream but it was completely different. the idea was that once the dreamies reached a certain age they would get put into a permanent sub unit but fans got pissed off when mark was going to graduate and the whole system was abolished. so its all fucking pointless. nct as it is is super conceptually flawed on many levels and i was thinking abt how you could fix some of those issues. is there a way to pull off the infinite member concept effectively in a way that isnt exactly the same as akb48? and then i came up with the most brilliant plan.
ok so you know how sometimes before idols actually get put into their permanent group they get put into some temporary subunit to create hype or whatever? ok so. that but with nct. so in my head nct is a group where idols get to debut early before eventually being put into their permanent group. that way they gain experience and they can also create an early fan base. so you put a bunch of boys in the group and because they will all eventually get into their permanent group you have a reason to consantly add members because none of them are going to be there forever.
in this scenario nct will still need subunits to function (it's just not practical to have all the members performing together outside of special events) but i want to change them up entirely. if you make subunits with established members the exact thing that happened with mark is going to happen here: fans will become attached to the group as a whole and when one has to leave they will riot. the solution to this is for all the subunits to rotate and have no established members. kind of like nct u but for all the subunits. in this idea the subunits are defined by concept and not by members.
so we would have two main subunits: nct 127 and nct dream. dream is the more youthful and colorful subunit while 127 is the edgier subunit and they both have very different sounds to distinguish them.
another important aspect of akb48 and nct is localization. akb48 has a few subunits that are set in specific countries. nct's whole thing is that they want to spread kpop propaganda or something, basically they want to have a bunch of subunits meant for specific countries, that's why wayv exists.
wayv is the superior nct subunit BUT from the perspective of a company like sm debuting them as the first localized subunit was a mistake because china doesn't have an idol industry like korea or japan so wayv are very limited in how they can promote themselves. wayv debuting was inevitable but they needed another subunit before them.
a japanese and american subunits are the smartest bets. japan has their own idol industry they're familiar and capturing american audiences can be a huge step for artists. im not going to talk too much about the japanese subunit but i have an idea for the american one. assuming we have the same members we currently have, johnny and mark definitely need to be in the american subunit. they're both american themselves and they would help a lot with the language barrier during interviews and shit. in terms of their public personas i think johnny and mark would also do a lot of challenging people's expectations of idols so that makes them a huge asset.
anyway, eventually all the boys will graduate and we can keep gradually adding members. this has so many benefits, you're making money with nct but you're also creating a fanbase and hype for your future boy groups. and because the group's subunits are constantly rotating it can actually be very welcoming to new fans. the group isnt permanent so there's no need to know all the members, you can just pick and choose the ones you like and follow them until they debut.
here's the pipeline i envision: fans become interested in one or just a handful of members -> they start listening to the music involving said member and maybe some of the others -> when the member in question makes his final debut his fans immediately run to support him and the group's music gets instant attention from people who already like a certain member.
Oh that's interesting, I think I've heard abt akb48 from a show. What if u tried out this idea in the sims like one of those computer programs that try to predict what the possible results of a situation are (but lucas is the only one not allowed to graduate, bc he's in the basement)
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Class 1A x Immortal reader
Warnings: death, Reader death (But revival), talks of pain
Reader info:
Quirk: Complete Restoration (This quirk allows the reader to completely heal from any injury, even allowing them to regrow organs and limbs)
A/N: I swear this isn’t angst, tbh I dont even know what to call this since it isnt fluff, crack, or angst enjoy anyway tho (Also Mineta is replaced with Shinso but that shouldn’t really be a problem lol)
You walked into the room of class 2-A greeted by the faces of your new classmates and Eraser Head, who you had met a few days prior, was lying on the floor wrapped up in his blindingly yellow sleeping bag. You walked through the door, the exhausted teacher sluggishly sitting up. “Alright, introduce yourself quickly, we have things to do afterwards” he grumbles before slouching back down.
You stepped beside the podium, reciting your rehearsed introduction from memory “Hello, I’m [Y/N] [L/N], I’m a new transfer from [Country]. I look forward to getting to know you all!” You finished, looking over towards Aizawa who was now standing, only half covered in his sleeping bag. “Alright,” he said, “now that that's over with, everyone get suited up and meet me at ground gamma.”
You followed the rest of the class towards the lockers to change into your costumes Your costume was simple, it consisted of a simple black full bodysuit that had two large pockets running down the outer sides of your legs containing rope for restraining, and some combat boots. Since your quirk didn’t give you any offensive properties, your weapon of choice was a scythe, which was quite noticeable as you paraded out of the locker room with it.
You, Ahisdo, Shinso and Midoriya were the first ones out of the locker rooms. You stood in awe of the massive industrial training grounds, as Ashido and Midoriya tried to convince you to tell them what your quirk is and Shinso looked like he was planning. As the rest of the class gathered up, you were greeted by your grumpy homeroom teacher and the frail form of all might. When all of you had arrived, All might began to brief you all on the exercise. “Today the battle will be a free for all, The border will be marked by a large red line that will shrink every minute, get pushed out of the border and you’re out, become immobilized, you’re out. Someone will win when they’re the last person standing within the border. We’ll give a 45 second grace period, for you all to get into a position, just make sure that you stay within the border.” He finished explaining. “Does everyone got it?” he asked, eliciting varying ‘yeses’ from you and your classmates. Before the class was told to begin Aizawa added something on. “One more thing, [L/N] and Shinso” your features became riddled with confusion. “As you most likely guessed this test will be an evaluation of you skills. And if I feel like your lacking what it takes to remain in this class, I will expel you.” You jumped at the notion of expelling while Shinso only narrowed his eyes, you knew that Eraserhead has expelled entire classes of students before, you were no exception to this.
You calmed your nerves just as the pair gave the signal for the grace period to start. All of you ran in, some moving faster than others due to their quirks. An overly loud horn blew throughout the arena just as you reached a safe area near the edge of the border.
‘I guess that was the signal’ you thought, starting to come up with a plan
You knew that you had the benefit of them not knowing your quirk, you were told of them and their quirks and you remember seeing them in the sports festival from last year. So your best bet would be sneak attacks and to knock people out of the border since you only had a limited amount of rope, you figured the stronger and more ballsy of your peers would be near the center, so the majority would be around the outskirts like you.
You were taken out of your thoughts by tape narrowly avoiding your face. You towards your right, to find the person of origin perched on top of a pipe. You readied your weapon in front of you, The memory of the sports festival last year coming back to you. The grip you kept on your weapon tightened as you ran towards Sero, dogging and cutting tape as it was shot as you. Once you were close enough to the pipe you jumped up, hitching your scythe into a vertical pipe adjacent to where you were jumping using the momentum to pull yourself up. As your feet landed on the metal with a soft thud, you pulled your weapon out, grasping it with both hands.
Without hesitation you run towards your current opponent, making your way between the two streams of tape he shot at you. Once he was within range of your weapon, turning the blade around so he was hit with the heel of your scythe. You watched as he fell off of the pole landing on his butt. Before he had a chance to get up or even register the slight pain in his tailbone, the large red line marking the perimeter began to move inward, leaving him outside the line. You slightly felt bad but remembered that there was still a challenge going on. However you knew you were definitely going to be apologizing.
Your next destination was closer to the center of the arena. While it was still fairly early in the game, you had no doubt that quite a few people were out. After a while navigating, only accompanied by the sound of your footsteps and the sound of fights off in the distance. Before you knew it you reached what you assumed was the center. Primarily due to the fact that the area seemed more cleared out compared to other places in the structure. The area seemed almost under ground due to the lack of pipes at the bottom but random pipes acting similar to a roof only letting stray beams of light worming their way to the ground. Within the large cleared out area three people stood the arena. Three who you recognized from their files Izuku Midoriya, Katsuki Bakugou, and Hitoshi Shinso.
You remembered them specifically since one only transferred to the hero course this year, and the other two were fairly powerful. From where you stood you noticed a few other people, their either eyes trained on the scene in front of them waiting for an opportune moment to take one of them out or fighting someone else. The boys were currently engaged in a three-way battle trying their best to keep each other at bay while also trying to keep each other down.
The boy in the green seemed to have a slight advantage since he seemed more skilled in close ranged hand-to-hand combat than the others. The blonde was stuck primarily on defense and the purple haired boy seemed to have a decent balance between defense and offense. You remembered Aizawa’s words, the threat of expulsion still slightly terrifying you. You took a deep breath and formulated a plan.
As the battle continued you scaled your way up the pipes avoiding the other spectators. You eventually made you way to the end of a pipe that led directly over the battle- well as direct as you could be considering how much they moved around. You did your best to stay as quiet as possible as your made your way across the pipe until something caught your eye. Quite a bit ahead of you, the pipe got unstable due to it missing quite a few screws. It was unstable enough that probably if you applied enough pressure the pipe would collapse causing a domino effect to the few pipes below it. You knew if you spent anymore time thinking it over you would psych yourself out of it.
You got a running start and jumped onto the pip fell with it was everything collapsed. The trio below you saw and each to appropriate actions to save themselves. Bakugou jumping back using the force of explosions to power himself back. Shinso using his capture weapon to move larger pieces of debris out of his way. Deku jumping off of the falling rubble to make sure none of it fell on himself.
That portion of the Arena was covered in a layer of dust causing everyone to cough. As the dust started to settle, letting everyone open their eyes and get fresh breaths of air into their lungs, that's when they noticed it. You were dead…? You laid on top of the rubble, only small pieces laying on top of you. There was quite a noticeable head wound, and a hole in your stomach. Almost like a piece of metal had passed clean through you.
No one dared to move, the sight of a dead body causing some of them gag, trying to keep the bile in their stomachs. No one’s eyes dared to stay fixated on anything your body, like if they looked away you would really be dead. The most stoic of your classmates were unable to keep their unwavering facades together. Everyone's thoughts were interrupted by a sudden yelling from the pile of wreckage “THAT HURT LIKE A BITCH!” You yelled, sitting up unaware of the state of your classmates. Tears started to flow as some of them finally gained the courage to run up to you bombarding you with questions.
You chuckled at the familiar questions of “what?” “how?” “weren’t you dead?” Aizawa looked through the screen, a shock that was unknown to his colleague riddled his mind. He knew what your quirk was, but he didn’t know it was to that extent. He had seen healing quirks at work before, but he had never seen someone just come back to life like that. Aizawa ended the training session early giving you his logical ruse spiel while also reprimanding you for being that reckless.
Soon enough lunch rolled around, and you sat with a large group of one 1-A students ending up next to the green haired boy from earlier. As soon as you sat down you were bombarded with questions before you chuckled. “I can’t answer all your questions at once, one at a time please.” Midoriya asked his questions first which were basically all the practical ones.
“What is your quirk?”
“It’s called complete restoration, I’m just able to heal any injury on myself, including ones that are fatal.”
“So you’re immortal?”
“Pretty Much.” you answered curtly, continuing to stuff your face.
“Do you feel pain?” a red head asked sheepishly. “Not in the slightest! But I can tell when I get hurt, it’s like some sort of sixth sense. And “dying” is practically just waking up from that weird falling feeling ” You shrugged. “But it makes it really fun to jump off of buildings and stuff!” you finished giggling. Your classmates looked at you with a mix of awe and disbelief, continuing to ask questions throughout the lunch period.
#Bnha#Mha#mha imagines#bnha imagines#Class 1a#class 1-a x reader#bnha x reader#reader insert#Katsuki Bakugou#Izuku Midoriya#Hitoshi Shinso#eijiro kirishima#Mina Ashido#Shouta Aizawa#Toshinori Yagi#Possible Part 2 I just wouldnt know what to do with it#I rlly like the potential for this quirk#I only added a scythe cuz before I wrote this I had just rewatched soul eater for the 5th time#tw: death
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How I Digitally Paint like a Scenic Artist/Designer
Aka: how I did this and put my degree to good use.
LONG POST WARNING
Step 1: Research.
First off, get to your image search. If you are going to be using Google, you may want to type “-pinterest” in the search to eliminate the countless boards.
I had to figure out clothing that is vaguely late 1800s. I found a multitude of reference images that were fancier clothes- but I wanted to find images of clothing for kindred across all social classes. Photographs from the era and paintings are your friend. They will more accurately showcase what was worn.
After Fashion research comes location research. The 1890s in America is known for the rapid industrialization. Factories were getting bigger and work days were getting longer. But, I wanted the moonlight to be cascading into the place, illuminating the scene. This means I needed to find a structure that had skylights or let sunlight in. And the best images I found? Slaughterhouses. Fitting, huh?
The same rule for fashion still stands- if you can find photographs or paintings from the era- they’re better. There are tons of places still standing today from the 1800s. But today, they look WAY different. Ya know, Abandoned! So just be sure to take this into consideration if you search “abandoned slaughterhouses” or go trespassing like I did.
Lastly, pose research. Finding the poses for a fight scene can be tedious. So, I enlisted some help from a few fight choreographers and stunt men. You can record their fights and play them back at quarter or half speed. You can also get a mirror and flop on the floor a bunch. I did both. This lets you see the action/motion lines you are going to replicate in the drawing. Heres how we initially did fina’s pose:
And sometimes you have to go back and get a clean shot. I ended up using this pose for the axe.
Step 2: Set up and Background!
When you open a new file, set it to the dimensions and resolution you want. I was working at 600. Usually, I’m working at 300-350. You can always reduce resolution. Its hard to prevent fuzzy lines if you increase it later.
I cannot stress the following enough:
You work background to foreground. Big Shapes and areas to little shapes. Work your way forward. What this means is you need to fill in as much space as possible first. Then build your details. I prefer working as follows: Big Solid tones, Soft shadows, Dark Shadows, Highlights, then final blend. Once you finish this, put an overlay on top. This knocks everything back and helps create the illusion of depth. See this at work with the video below or here
Step 3: Figure Drawings + Composition
Utilize that research and images you collected to pose your characters. I create subfolders for each set of figures. Organization is important here. This will help keep you on the right layer and prevent the eternal digital artist struggle of “Fuck that was on the wrong layer!”
Even after you move on to lineart and shading, Keep the sketch layer as a reference. You may need to see what youre original notes/ figures looked like as you do the lineart and shade. Don’t be afraid to move them around and alter the composition rn. You want to be able to make changes. Make notes! Detail light sources!
I’m about to through out some art jargon:
You want to think about asymmetric balance. The easiest way to achieve this in an eye-pleasing manner is to use the Fibonacci spiral. Yeah. This boi:
Place your figures and actions in a similar sequence to the spiral and the viewer’s eye tends to naturally follow it. This is sometimes called the Golden Ratio in the art world.
Doesn’t need to be perfectly on the spiral. You can break it- but its an excellent tool to plan how things move in the piece.
Step 4: Lineart
Once you got things sketched- its time to do the lineart. I’m using clip studio paint’s standard brushes. Nothing fancy. I often switch between the G-pen and the For Effect Liner. Mapping and Turnip are for thicker lines.
Usually I set these pens to a specific thickness depending on where I’m drawing.
My background figures are lined at 0.05 thickness, the midground is .1 to .2, Fina is .3 and the foreground is .4. I set my stabilization high to help keep my lines smooth. Stabilization 100 means there’s a significant delay between where the pen is and the cursor. I like the stabilization to be at 20 for freehanding and at 50 ish for outlining. Dont become completely reliant on the stabilization though. Good and smooth lineart is drawn from the arm not the wrist. Your range of motion is severely limited if you only move your wrist. Practice moving from your elbow and you’ll be surprised how much smoother your lines get.
Once I finish lining the figures, I usually go around it with an outline. This does three things:
1. Solidifies the figure and cleans lineart for paint bucket tool. More on that in the next step.
2. Its a stylistic choice. Helps give it that comic book feel with a heavy outline.
3. Pushes figures forward or back in the composition. Thicker outline helps denote that a figure is farther forward than another. My background figures have no outline to push them away
Step 5: Digitally coloring
For each figure you are going to select outside the lineart.
Create a new layer under the lineart
Invert the selection. Paint bucket. You should now have a solid shape of the figure under the lineart. Do not deselect.
Create a new layer above the one color. Title it solid colors. Paint in thick, solid tones. I like to use the mapping pen and turnip pen to color in my solid tones: skin, clothing, hair, etc.
After that, deselect. Create a multiply layer if you can. If your program does not have a multiplier function, Pick a tone you want to use for shadows and lower the opacity (usually 30-40% I like to use lavenders or blue tones). It will not be as vibrant, but you can edit it in post. Select off of the solid colors layer. I like to start with skin tones. Use the airbrush tool to create soft shadows. You don’t want to create harsh lines on this layer.
Then repeat this process with harsh lines.
Then knock it all back with an overlay. If you dont have the ability to create an overlay, you can again drop a solid color and lower the opacity, but you’ll have to mess with the color balance/ brightness/contrast to let all the hard work come through.
You’re going to repeat this for every single figure. Here’s a few color theory tips though.
Your overlay colors should be darker (not more vibrant) in the foreground and lighter (avoid using pure white) in the background. This helps with the depth of the piece. Things closer tend to be darker (not always true, depends on lighting)
You can choose to use color theory to aid your shadows. Instead of choosing black or grey for shadows, choose a complimentary color. I used a lot of green for this piece, I used red for really dark shadows. Its not that black drains color- its just loses some depth if not used carefully.
Keep your colors consistent. Helps unify the piece. You can strategically break the consistency to draw focus. For example, Fina is the only figure with a true blue overlay. This helps her stand out from the other figures who have reds and greens.
Step 6: Touch Ups and Final Renderings
Now comes the most tedious part. If you’re like me, your computer fans have been whirring for the last few hours trying to render this monster of a file. If you havent already, SAVE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS GOOD
These are the last four layers I have for the entire piece. Here, I am trying to create effective and believable lighting. This kind of work I have only been able to achieve in clip studio or photoshop. You can do it with normal layers, but choose your colors CAREFULLY. Stay away from pure white. Carefully utilize your knowledge of light and shadow to create soft highlights. Harsh lines tend to be a stylistic choice for me. The final layer, subtract, dulls out harsh red tones. I used this as a final overlay to help put everyone and everything in the scene. Without it, things are a little too green and skin tones are a little too blushed for vampires.
The challenge here is I want to tone down the red, but not lose the vibrancy of the blood. So, shift it to a blue. This also helped reinforce the “nighttime” effect. Its only a slight change.
Final thoughts:
Whenever you finish something, its important to reflect.
1. I am so FUCKING PROUD OF MYSELF. This is easily one of the most complicated pieces I’ve done in a while- and I’ve made 16′ tall faux stained glass. Brag. Let yourself feel awesome cuz you just made something awesome.
2. I timed myself on the piece. I could have easily spent another 7 hours on it. But its important to know when to stop messing with it. Partially for budget reasons but also when you get down to the details you can make yourself go insane. Theres also a ton of detail work I lost cuz of overlays or its just too small to notice. Fina’s face? hard to see cuz its not close enough.
3. I needed to take frequent breaks for this piece. That was good. Resting and stretching was very important. That is one of the reasons why I was able to work so fast.
4. I started doing more digital art in April 2020. I have to say, practice makes perfect. I practice drawing and digital painting for at least 3 hours a day.
That discipline has allowed me to improve so rapidly. So- I don’t wanna hear shit about I can’t possibly get this good! Or I couldn’t even draw a stick figure! BULLSHIT. You can. Get yourself some free software like Krita or Autodesk sketchbook and start playing!
And thats what I got! Thanks for coming with me on this long post!
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Slow Dancing In The Dark
Characters: Hanji Zoe x Levi Ackerman
Genre: Romance/Fluff
Rating: T
Here’s part 1 of my gift for LeviHan Eggscghange 2020 :) I hope my dear giftee enjoys this.Part 2 will be out in a couple of days!
You can also read this on AO3
@levihanweek
Working for Sina Industries has always been a life long dream for Hange.As a wide eyed child,she would always watch live broadcasts of their space launches and tell herself one day shes gonna be there.Standing in mission control smiling as she watched one of her creations get sent to a different planet.Armed with a degree & a determined heart,she applied as an engineer.You could imagine her disappointment when she was crammed into an 8x12 cubicle in the basement to design and develop circuitry which their boss greedily takes credit for all the damned time.She's pretty good at keeping a front that shes a pretty chill with all her bosses bullshit but she finally lost it when he started harassing a temp.Hange bravely spoke out and got into a heated argument with her boss.She got supended for a week after that.
It took almost six months before she was promoted to another 8x12 cubicle.Only this time,shes moving up on the infamous 17th floor.The place where they flung all the adept yet problematic employees.Its pretty much the same,shitty boss,intricate work but now on a higher pay grade and a lot more hearsay about her reputation.Its not so bad though,despite the lack of recognition and grueling work hours she met a handful of wonderful coworkers who shared the same pain.
Mike and Nanaba were sort of the required stable couple of the group.She met them a month after the big promotion when she caught them making out in the copy room.She's probably standing there for an entire minute awkwardly making fake cough noises to alert them of her presence.Enter Erwin Smith,he casually strode up by the couple and grabbed the box of printer ink Hange desperately needed.He's like freaking Captian America & Superman combined except he has a mind of a slytherin.Not that it was a bad thing.
And then there's Levi,The crabbiest member of their little group,Mr.I-look-very-angry-and-irritated-all-the-time-but-inside-lies-a-total-softy.He’s a clean freak who befittingly,is a sanitary engineer.Rumors say that Levi had tendencies with violence and had to be sent at 17th floor for precaution.There used to be a time when they didn't get along.She'd been very welcoming towards him but hes always been aloof and cold.She didn't mind it at first,but after a while it kinda got into her nerves.Til that christmas party back in 2017,where she had a few drinks and sort of confessed that she liked him and it really bummed her out that he didn't feel the same way.For the first time,she saw something other than disinterest and irritation on his face...she saw confusion.He asked her what shes on about,then reminded her that he just made her chocolates for valentines day when she won't shut up about craving something sweet.He doesn't do that kind of shit just for anyone and after that,hange was pretty sure they've become best friends.
Their friendship was forged in companionship in misery but as time passed they became her second family.
One of the things that Hange looked forward to is hanging out with them every Friday night at a dive bar a few blocks away from their office where they get shit faced and let off some steam from their work.Hange was preoccupied with the jukebox when Mike arrived with his arm slung over Levi dragging the smaller man into her space.”You'll never guess what happened.”The man announced and before she could answer the man screamed."Someone got asked for a date!"
"Ohoho!Whos the lucky girl?"Nanaba came out of nowhere carrying two mai tais and handed one to Hange before heading over at Mike's side.
"Petra Ral."Erwin chimed cooly while sipping a glass of scotch.His blond hair still laid perfectly even after a long tiring day at work.
"From PR?Holy shit!Good job!"Hange said slapping Levi’s shoulder hurting her hand in the process.The man didn’t even falter from where he stood,all he did was stare straight at her before scowling."It's not a big deal.”He said settling his gaze on his side.
Hange smiled.
He’s shy.Levi Ackerman is actually being shy about getting asked out by an adorable strawberry blonde colleague.Isn’t that precious?She’d never seen him like that before.Heaven knows how much she wanted to tease him about his situation but she can clearly tell by the way he clenched his jaw and the deep creases on the space between his brows that if she says anything,he'd run straight to the wall to escape,cartoon style.
Mike started telling the story and Levi sneakily started edging towards the exit.Before the questions came flooding in,Levi was already gone.
“I think I should follow him.“Hange announced.
"Try to convince him to go out with Ral!"Mike shouted which prompted Erwin to take his drink away from him."I think you had enough."
"Goodluck!"Nanaba raised her drink at her.Before helping Erwin keep Mike's drink away from him.
#
Hange found Levi brooding on the sidewalk while smoking.”Can I get a light?”She asked.
“Its cold.”He said,which also translates to she should go back inside or she’ll catch a cold.Levi’s nice like that,it took everything in her to hold back and not make a snide comment.He alwas hated it when he gets called out for being considerate.
“So Petra Ral huh?”She started.
“I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“We don’t have to,If you don’t want to.”Hange calmly took a box of cigarettes from her pocket and stood a bit closer to him.
“Good.”He said before tossing her his lighter.
Hange bit her lower lip to stifle a smile and Levi was already armed with his grumpy face.He's getting a little agitated.She let the silence drag on for a while as she started to giddily shift from where she stood.Unable to contain her curiosity.
“But its Petra Ral...The Petra Ral!Our company sweetheart.”She exploded.
“I barely know her.”
"Isn’t that what dating is for?!Besides,She probably just needs to get dicked down."Hange said casually."Go for it!Have a little fun.What’s there to lose?"
"Yeah well...I don't think I could."Levi started bouncing his leg.Is he nervous?Agitated?Both?It seemed like he's trying to say something.
“Levi,you know we wont judge you if you’re gay right?You don’t have to hide it from us.”
“Why would I be hiding that if I was?”
“Then what are you nervous for?"
“I’m not nervous...I.."Levi paused as if he's considering if he should tell her."I haven’t...I...”
“You're acting like you've never been out on a date."she said.
Levi visibly stiffened and averted her curious eyes.From where she sat,she could see how levi clenched his jaw and feel him hold his breath.No?It cant be...
"Oh.Its been a while for you huh?like 6 months?"She tried to take a wild stab but was met with silence.Hange sobered."You’ve never been on a date before?"she repeated a little louder than she meant to and not soon after she found Levi's hand over her mouth.
“You wanna scream that a little louder?“
“EVER?!”She peeled his hand off her face and asked.
“Tch.I dont need this.“Levi rolled his eyes and started leaving but hange caught his arm.
"Hey!I'm sorry.I didn't know.Its nothing to be embarrassed about.Its just,its a little uncommon you know.I'm really sorry.I didn't mean to be a dick.”
She assumed that its not because of the lack of people who wanna date with him.Believe it or not,this whole quiet mysterious guy persona is a total chick magnet.She even had several people from the office ask about him every once in a while.So what happened?Is it trauma?Is he aromantic?Holy shit!How could she be so insensitive?
“Stop looking at me like that.”He frowned.Snapping her out of her thoughts.
“Sorry,I was just thinking...”
“Don’t think of anything.Just mind your own business and let me be.”
“What kind of friend would I be if I let you be?”
“A good one.And stop drawing conclusions!I can practically see the thoughts up your head.I'm not anything I just...dont know how.”
“why are you so intent on giving up?!I thought you like her!”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Oh please Ackerman!How can you not?She's the perfect mix of adorable,kind,fiesty and beautiful...she’s perfect for you!”
"What do you want me to do?"he asked,in his how can I make you shut up tone.
"What if I help you?You could...I dont know...practice with me?I could help you with the whole dating thing!"Levi looked at her as if she grew another head.Honestly shes just happy he didn't look disgusted with her proposal.He gave her a once over before pinching the bridge of his nose.She knows this maneuver.Its the what-have-i-gotten-my-self-into or holy-shit-am-I-actually-considering-this move.“Are you sure about this?”He asked.
Hange made a gesture of crossing over her heart and raising her right hand up and levi scrunched his brows together.
“Quit downplaying this.I’m serious.”
“I wont offer it if my not 100% I’m serious. The last guy I went out with was a total disappointment and Petra deserves better than that.You know she helped me last Christmas...”
“Yeah,yeah she helped you change your tire."He supplied,refraning hange from tellong the story again.
“And in exchange I'm gonna help you be more fun and well rounded for your date!It's the circle of life!”Hange enthusiastically smiled.
“Alright.How do we start?”Levi asked.
"Ask Petra to reschedule your date for next week,Then we can take the whole week to practice."
#
The harsh sun bore down on Levi as if reminding him never to indulge Hange with her antics again.Aparrently,she found Petra's online journal and identified that she had two dream dates.One is a carnival date (which explains why he is standing in line for cotton candy out in the middle of the goddamn afternoon.) and the other was spending an evening at a local jazz bar in the city.
Levi doesn't know how she successfully lured him out.You see,he liked his comfort zone and for some unknown reason Hange always challenged him to take a step out of the little box he created around him.And although there are times when she proved that taking a risk was worth it,Levi never really appreciated getting stuck in very shitty situations like now.He doesn't know how she seemed fine with all these shitty conditions.Maybe because she's been busy talking about her new droid remodel.
"Hey Levi are you listening to me?"
"Yes."He said exasperated.
"What was I saying then?"She folded her arms and raised her brows,challenging him.
"You're planning to replace fiberglass with aerogel as insulator on your next shitty droid."He said which earned a bright smile from her.Tch!He rolled his eyes at that and stepped forward after the couple infront of them was served with an unreasonable amount of cotton candy.
"I'll get the giant sunshine surprise."Hange said and the vendor then started shaping the cotton candy into a big daisy.Hange looks absolutely delighted.
"That will be 50 dollars."The vendor said offering his open palm to him which prompted him to turn towards Hange."Oh!let me get my wallet!"Hange started going though her bag and for some reason he felt chills run through him.WheN he raised his head,he noticed that people around them started glaring at him.Oh great he forgot!He's in a fake date.He assumed people still think he's obligated to pay.Tch.So fucking primitive.Although he's never the guy who gave much fuck about what others think,he didnt want people to think Hanges being mistreated.Begrudgingly,he paid for the goddamn cotton candy.Hange took that opportunity to talk about how expenses should be handled during dates,she personally likes going dutch but immediately started going on about some studies that says women generally like it when the males carries out the expenses.
Hange's like a battery that never runs out of energy.She wanted to ride every possible attraction from the carnival!Beads of sweat are starting to form on her forehead but she never seem to notice,he started leading her to a park bench to rest for a bit.He appreciated how much she prepared.She was very keen on citing the psychology articles and some magazines she read to help him be better at dating.He doesn't even know why would anyone even exert that much effort for him.
She really is something.
He pulled out his handkerchief out of his pocket and started gently dabbing it on her forehead.
She smiled.
#
Hange didn't really need to teach him much.Despite the seemingly abrasive qualities Levi possess,the man is a very courteous guy.He said thank you,please and treated the park employees with respect.Shes pretty sure he wouldnt have much trouble impressing a girl."You never told me why you've never been out on a date."She started.
"I was never asked."Levi shrugged as if telling her its no big deal.Hange was shocked at his honesty but appreciated his straight answer.
"Based on my observations today I'd say all those girls that didnt ask you out missed out on a good time."
"Tch!Quit bullshitting me."
"It's true!You diligently listened to my stories, joined me riding all the and most importantly,you bought me an unreasonably overprized cotton candy."
Levi let out a soft chuckle at that and Hange immediately panicked.This is the first time she ever made him chuckle and goddamn it was glorious.It's like his features lit up and made him look years younger.She had to bit her lower lip to sort of calm her wild heartbeat.They stayed seated on the bench for a while when Levi surprisingly asked her to walk around some more.As they started to amble along the park,an idea popped on her head.
#
Her hands gently crept on his wrist and made way to cup his hand "what the..."He glared at their joined hands,but didn't find the need to pull away."You're sticky."He remarked
"Does sticky hands really matter if youre holding hands with your crush?"She asked.He kept his eyes on her and he saw blush creep up to her face."I-I mean not me...I meant Petra...which is basically me because im her placeholder at the moment and..."
"Hange."
"Hm?"
"Shut up."He slipped his Fingers against the gaps of hers and continued wandering around the park.
#levihan#levihaneggschange#levihaneggschange2020#hange zoe#hanji zoe#levi ackerman#snk#aot#shingeki no kyojin#attack on titan#snk fanfiction#fanfiction#otp
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can you talk more about Iron Man 2 Natasha versus other Natashas?? I feel pure joy when I see it <3
sure <333 ill break it up into sections by movie
iron man 2: shes literally the love of my life and the reason why i even started liking natasha in general but like outside of My personal feelings i do think this is the best iteration of natasha by far. her cover story for stark industries was SO good like do u know how clever u have to be to get around tony’s systems? and imo its literally the ONLY time in the mcu where we get to see natasha being a SPY even though thats a large part of her skillset. i loved the hallway scene in the end where she got to show off and literally singlehandedly take down all those guards and i loved the moment between her and tony before his birthday party. it was honest, vulnerable but subtle enough that it makes SENSE for natasha’s character.
the avengers: hmm. probably my second favourite iteration of nat. i loved the beginning with her at her mission and then her manipulating bruce, i thought those scenes were both in character. also, ive seen ppl say that they hate that first scene where nat is being interrogated bc it makes her appear as weak when ?? i feel like it does the opposite ?? like shes literally only still tied up bc she wants to be, so that she can get more information. she is literally in control there, she was just waiting for the time to strike n had to do it sooner than later bc of clont getting compromised. anyways idk i like ta!nat i think shes fine but theres not much in terms of like. anything else other than Badass Character, u feel? also i HATED how scared she was of bruce/hulk. it left a bad taste in my mouth n i cant believe they tried a romance there after
winter soldier: maybe controversial but i hate her in this movie jrbjhabsjd or i guess hate is a strong word but i dont like her in this movie. like first of all the role shouldnt have even been hers??? it shouldve been sharon’s and it was supposed to be until they decided to replace sharon with her. her characterization in this movie is literally god-awful which imo led to her shitty characterization in endgame. she was genuinely humiliating when she tried to go undercover in this like idc how brief it is shes always ready (in dd v2 she literally wore a FULL disguise to visit matt as work when there was a lot of press so she wouldnt gain any attention for him. foggy didnt recognize her til she took off her wig) so the fact that she would put on a HOODIE ??? AND GO ??? TO A PLACE WHERE THERES CLEARLY CAMERAS ??? humiliating. the part where she was like 🥺🥺 would u trust me to save ur life ?? humiliating. natasha doesnt give a SHIT about what people think of her. frankly, all steve did up to that point was heavily judge her so she shouldnt care abt what he thinks. they obviously tried to make her a more emotional character in this but it just came off wrong lmao. i did like her last scenes though
age of ultron: ill keep this short—i dont like aou nat, i dont think it was a good representation of nat at all and i absolutely despise the brucenat romance with my entire heart. i did like her suit and fight scenes but thats it. theres not enough words to describe how misogynistic and wrong and disgusting it was for them to say natasha is a monster like bruce to make HIM feel better just bc she cant have children. 616 natasha sweetie.
civil war: the twist of her being the one to change sides was so lame i literally have to laugh like omg wowow the former spy ended up switching sides how unexpected i cant believe no one saw that coming. her being on tony’s side was the right call and the switch was stupid thats all lmao they just wanted her to stay with steve and sam after the team broke up which is literally stupid bc either way she shouldve been on her own. irritashun
infinity war: honestly not much to say she only had 6 minutes and all she did was Fight ppl so it was ur typical portrayal of nat. her eyebrows and hair were atrocious though. it shouldve been black hair as a nod to 616 nat’s tendency to dye her hair black in the old comics
endgame: oh boy where to even start. this is my least favourite iteration of nat in the entire mcu. i literally did not recognize her for a SECOND. before the movie came out, sc/rjo talked abt how we would see a pissed off nat ready to take action and i was really excited because THAT sounded like the nat i knew. but when the movie actually came, we saw her ?? moping ?? crying ?? eating a sad ass sandwich by herself ?? basically doing the emotional labour for the team because god forbid any of the men do it ??????? and the fact that they CUT OUT ALL OF HER COPING SCENES TOO LIKE THE TARGET PRACTICE, THE PUNCHING BAG??? i cant jbhjabsdhj it makes me SO fucking furious that they would make her some overly emotional character—like not to say that its a bad thing to be that, its not, but it’s also NOT natasha in any way. ive said this before but natasha’s grief almost ALWAYS manifests in the form of anger and u can explicitly see that in secret empire when she cries by herself for a minute, composes herself and gets ready to kill stevil. u can see that during hickmanvengers when its HER that realizes this is more than just taking sides, theres a bigger fight. i wanted so desperately to see a pissed-off nat and i was literally lied to. n then her ending lmao?!?!?!?! i dont even want to touch on that bc its going to get me so fucking mad jrbhavshgd abut i will talk abt it briefly: FUCK her ending FUCK the russos FUCK m&m and FUCK everyone who said this was empowering. it wasnt. she literally died for HER family, who she decided wasnt as important as clint’s blood family. thats BULLSHIT. its so stupid and the fact that she wasnt even able to reunite with everyone?? the fact that she died in the SAME DISGUSTING MANNER that gamora did???? like she didnt even make it to the FINAL BATTLE. how on earth do u treat ur first female hero (and one of the first female leads of the mcu in general) like that????? the fact that they didnt even give her a proper funeral bc they said that natasha is ~private~ like shes not some fucking loner or recluse. at the very least, we shouldve seen them mourning her properly (steve shedding one tear and bruce throwing shit around doesnt count) but they really said fuck women xo
#in conclusion im2 nat good a4 nat bad every other nat eh#<33 thank u for the q i love talking ab my girl#asks
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Hey yaz! I was just wondering your opinion on why you think Liam's mgtm would have him "date" a 17/18 yo. I dont follow m*ya at all and know p nothing abt her except that she is a model (?) and her dad is famous (?). I just feel like its weird they would pick someone a decade younger than him. My friends who arent 1d fans all have bad opinions abt him bc of this so like why do you think she was the choice? I understand publicity for her and stuff but just curious on what you think.
hey! i honestly think they just don’t care that much about the age aspect of it (and probably didn’t even consider the fact that the reaction would be so icky or maybe they did but just didn’t care), i think it’s mainly just the old/usual tried and true PR and Promo for an Up and Coming Model™ gimmick that they’ve done time and again (because they know it works. because they’ve done 867 times now and still the het side of the fandom manages to fall for it every time and swoon their idiotic asses off) and the age gap was just a secondary thing that they were maybe hoping ppl either wouldn’t pay much attention to or wouldn’t care about. apparently they didn’t learn their lesson from the way ppl reacted to him and c and the whole gross pedophilic predator aspect of that whole scenario (w/ the stories of her flirting and preying after liam since he was 14, etc. smdh). but as pretty much everything has shown, 1dhq (or whoever is running shit now) and the entertainment industry in general tends to always be about 42 5-10 years behind when it comes to being cognizant of general public changing sentiments over things. i mean just look at how many shows and movies from within the last couple of years are STILL portraying relationships between adults and underage teenagers and acting like that’s normal and perfectly acceptable (riverdale, pll, shameless, etc.). maybe in the early 2000′s no one was really batting an eye that much (cause it was so normalized on tv/in movies over all these decades that a lot of us didn’t really think too hard about it) but that shit certainly ain’t flying in post-MeToo era and yet...asshats still out here showcasing it.
and the same with representation i mean shows like glee and modern family were a game-changer for sure but it still took like 5-10 or so years after those shows’ inceptions for the rest of hollywood to get with the program and start putting more queer characters in their shows and movies and just generally engaging in more diverse representation on a whole (as far as race, religion, gender/gender identity, neurodivergence plus-sized, and handi-capable representation, etc. as well). hollywood/the industry in general has always been super slow to change and get on board with the progression of the rest of society, and super reluctant/resistant to change at that. i mean i know all this is only tangentially related but they are largely still fighting the rise of streaming services tooth and nail despite the fact that most of the big ones have existed now for around a decade. i have a friend who works in the music industry who’s talked to me in-depth about how much the big record companies are still remaining super set in their old dinosaur ways and insanely obstinate about changing their business methods in a way that would make much more sense with the direction of the market and the heavy skew towards free streaming because they just refuse to accept that the entire market has changed and is only gonna continue to change. but instead just wanna sit and wallow and try to force ppl to play by their old games in a way that just is not sustainable and very likely only gonna wind up losing them money and business in the long run. and ofc we see the same with politics.
it’s all just old dinosaurs who can’t let go of the way things used to be and we’re unfortunately seeing that all play out in a weird way with this whole let’s make liam date a teenager bit. whoever came up with it, whether it was her family or 1dhq or both or whoever, is clearly wayyy behind the times when it comes to public sentiment and either did not even foresee/consider all the ways this was gonna be digested in a largely super negative way by the public (and by extension blow back on liam in a super negative way), OR is so fame-hungry/money-hungry and so desperate to get this girl some attention that they just did not care at all how it would look or be received.
...or both. honestly i’d be very willing to bet it’s a little bit of both lol
anyway short story long the gate-keepers of every major industry in this country (and lbr, the world in general) can’t deal with the fact that their breed and their business models are rapidly going extinct or becoming obsolete. they can try all they want to force their old (gross) ideals and outdated business practices on an unwilling public but the fact of the matter it’s very likely only gonna end up biting them in the ass and having the exact opposite result than what they wanted.
(that or it’s a huge concerted negative campaign against liam that’s going swimmingly lol but that’s way too tinhatty and conspiratorial even for me and i highly doubt they would do all this and expend this much time, effort, and money into something that was purely meant for the purpose of sabotaging liam and nothing more, and that didn’t also in some way guarantee mutually assured gain in the form of promo for m and her family. this is compounded by the fact that liam’s very clearly spent the majority of the last two years being photographed almost exclusively with either her, or shady people in the business and fashion industries that also seemingly happen to have strong ties/connections to her father. that’s not a coincidence. this is clearly largely for her benefit. but - as what i’m sure is a nice bonus for whoever made the other end of the agreement on liam’s behalf - also doubles as a continued opportunity to perpetuate the already highly problematic public image liam has unfortunately been saddled with, as well ofc the usual perpetual bearding and closeting)
#fire-and-water-for-your-love#asks#my thoughts#liam#maya#laya#1dhq#public perception#public sentiment#entertainment industry#shitty promo#pr relationships#ugh sorry this got soooooo long lol
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Zoos are frequently demonized in modern media and pop culture.
At worst, they are seen as cruel and degrading prisons for wildlife, where animals are abused and tormented for the sake of 'entertainment'.
At best, they are viewed as a necessary evil to keep endangered animals from going extinct, both as an "Ark" directly breeding animals, and as a fundraiser giving money to conservation work in the natural habitats of those animals, as well as giving the public direct contact with animals they would most likely never see alive.
But more and more, we hear phrases from zoo workers themselves, like;
"In a perfect world, zoos would not exist"
"It's not enough to keep animals in exhibits just for people to look at. There has to be a higher purpose." (Actual quote)
My question is: Why?
No one is demanding a higher purpose for us to keep dogs, cats, horses, cattle, pigs, rats, rabbits, even 'exotic' and non-domestic animals like snakes, parrots and aquarium fish.
As long as it's a 'typical' species owned as a pet, it seems it needs no justification (excluding livestock for food and clothing as that is an obvious 'higher purpose', even though not everyone likes it).
If someone wants to own any of those animals 'ust to look at it', almost no one will argue that there needs to be a 'higher purpose'.
"You can't just own a pet snake. You need to donate money to snake conservation, or you're a terrible human being!"
"You can't just walk your dog and rub its belly for your own enjoyment. You have to give to dog shelters, educate people on dogs and raise awareness of the hardships dogs face, or you're a hypocrite."
I have never heard anyone say anything even remotely like this.
Turn of the 20th century, polar bears at Belle Island Zoo.
There seems to be a common conception among the general public that zoos are still the bare 'prison cells' of the late 19th century to early 20th century, like the polar bear cage above.
Back then, the zoo owners and keepers were not trying to be cruel, they simply needed the enclosures to be practical and easy to clean, for the sake of the animals' hygiene and health.
No doubt they were ignorant about their animals' needs, compared to today, but they were not purposely cruel.
Bars look very bad to us, simply for being bars, bringing the mind to prisons. Bars were for keeping both animals and people safe, but they have in later decades been replaced by things like moats and glass, to make the zoo guests feel more comfortable looking at the animals (sometimes actually endangering animals and guests, when it makes it easier for guests to get inside the enclosure).
Still, no doubt, zoos have vastly improved in the past century, as much as (if not more than) our fields of modern healthcare and technology. Today's world is nothing like 1910, and the same is true for zoos.
The animal experts that work for zoos today, know so much more about diets, healthcare, enrichment, adequate enclosure size, material, and simply put, each species' needs to live a healthy and fulfilled life in an artificial environment.
Photos like these give the public the impression that these animals spend their entire lives in small, bare, prison-like enclosures.
...while in fact, they spend most of their time in large habitats like these, and the small enclosures are just night quarters for care and safety, just like a dog crate, a horse stall, or a child's bedroom.
"We don't lock people in unless they're criminals", some say.
First, I don't know any modern zoo that resembles any prison I've ever seen.
Second, we lock our pets in. We lock children in. Many animals can be roughly compared to a two year old child, in awareness and understanding of our world. Would you let a two year-old roam the streets at night, free to come and go as he wished? Of course not. He would get himself badly hurt or killed. Add to that a two year old that is potentially very dangerous to the public, like a lion or elephant.
This is something not many seem to consider, but pet owners have absolutely no business criticizing zoos. Or people who eat meat, or consume products that exploit or harm animals in any way (this includes vegans, as it is simply impossible to live in modern society and avoid engaging in industries that exploit or harm animals).
As a pet owner, whether your pet is a dog, cat, rabbit, budgie, goldfish, ferret, snake, or anything else, you are confining that animal. You are giving it an 'unnatural' existence. Exotic species like budgies and snakes recently came from the wild, and have barely changed - if at all - from their wild ancestors. It is impossible to replicate their natural habitat in a home.
If it is a domestic animal, like a dog or a rabbit, the only way it has changed from its wild ancestors, is being less afraid, more amenable to handling, making it easier to have loose in the house (dogs and cats), and their appearance being changed slightly.
It is still the same animal, with the same needs as its wild ancestors.
If you own pets like this rabbit, you have no ground whatsoever on which to criticize modern zoos.
And even if you live in a mansion where your little toy poodle has the run of the house - that is a confined animal in an unnatural existence.
There is nothing inherently wrong with this, at all.
I'm sure that little toy poodle gets plenty of exercise, company, great food and fresh water, and its mind is properly stimulated. I'm sure that little dog would rather live there, warm and comfortable with a roof over its head, than out in the forest, at the mercy of the elements and its own hunting skills.
I'm sure a snake has an easier life in a terrarium, its environment always controlled to the perfect temperature and humidity, and never having to go hungry or thirsty, let alone worry about being eaten itself.
Pets, when cared for by good owners who truly take the time to find out how to best care for their animals, have in general very good lives. Better than they would in the wild, or a 'natural' existence.
The same is true for zoos.
The animals don't have an endless wilderness to roam - because they don't need to.
Animals only need enough space to stimulate them physically and mentally, and get 'personal space' from other animals, if there are many of them, to avoid conflict.
They only roam vast areas in the wild to find enough food, and for some, to avoid predators.
In the wild, they have to struggle to find food, starve if they can't, fight for mates, fight with or live under constant stress from fleeing from predators or rivals, be exposed to nature and its elements, have to fight off disease and parasites, and almost always die young.
In modern zoos, they always have the perfect diet prescribed by experts of the species, readily available. They never have to risk bodily injury just to find food or mate. They never have to worry about being hunted. They never have to worry about finding a safe place to rest, or dying from exposure. They never have to worry about parasites.
If they get sick, a team of top veterinarians and animal care staff who have trained all their adult lives for this exact purpose, are right there to help comfort and heal the animal.
And when some zoo animals die young, it is either due to congenital conditions that no one could help, wherever the animal lived, or it was euthanized. Killed quickly and painlessly.
Killer whale at SeaWorld San Diego
Why would someone need to justify that?
Keeping animals in the equivalent of 5-star hotels, free for a lifetime, is not something you should lower yourself to have to 'justify'.
The claim is that "zoos need to exist only to save animals from extinction. If wildlife was completely safe, zoos would be pointless".
It is true that zoos play an important role in conservation. It is true that if you have the power, like the money zoos are making, and the outreach they have through their guests, it is moral and right of you to do something to help.
A zoo that did nothing but exist, would not necessarily be very 'noble'.
But the point of this article is that they don't have to. It is not an automatic obligation, anymore than you as a dog owner are obliged to give to dog shelters, just because you have extra money, or educate people on the street petting your dog, about dogs. And that if you didn't do this, you would have no right to keep a dog 'imprisoned'.
Maybe you just want to have a dog?
And maybe someone just wants to have their animal collection, and let paying visitors come and look at it?
That is how zoos started. Wealthy and powerful people have kept exotic animal menageries for thousands of years. It was only in the middle of the 19th century that the public zoo was created, where the public was allowed to view these menageries, of course for a fee which helps pay for the upkeep of the animals.
What zoos are doing, when they try to justify themselves, is telling the public "our critics are completely right. Everything they say about zoos being 'horrible animal prisons', is right. We wish zoos didn't exist, but we are a necessary evil. Please just let us exist a little while longer, then we will go away, when we no longer need to abuse animals for conservation."
That is what one hears, when these zoo workers are essentially apologizing for their work existing.
As long as zoos aren't doing anything to harm wildlife, by removing animals from the wild without giving anything back to the wild populations, or by mistreating the animals in their care, they don't have to justify a thing.
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And All The Queen’s Men {Roger Taylor}
A/N: 5486 words. Okay wow. Please bare with me, this is a long one and also a bit of a different one. Written in the style of a Rolling Stone article. Finished it at 7am. Prompt & support from the lovely @ginghampearlsnsweettea
[And All The Queen’s Men ‘verse masterpost]
Warning: Minor character death, in both senses, it’s a baby, it’s not graphic it’s just mentioned, but just thought I should let you know.
And All The Queen’s Men: how the lines blurred between Queen and and the Queen of Jazz Rock.
An article almost two years in the making, after their last tour, which I was invited along to in order to write the initial article, the rock sensation Queen split, a decision, I am lead to be believe, was instigated by front man Freddie Mercury, and though Giselle Jones had continued to make music, even before her very public, on-stage breakdown, her lawyers had me keep the article to myself. Now, with the band’s reunion, and Live Aid having been a massive success with both powerhouse musical names coming back into the public eye, I’ve invited them back to my office for one last interview, but mostly to beg them to let me publish this article.
Which, obviously, they allowed.
It’s 1985, and with them all sitting in front of me, I feel a sense of deja vu. There are some changes, of course, Roger Taylor’s hair is shorter, Giselle Jones is wearing jeans and a sweater rather than her well-known cocktail dress, but John Deacon’s still smiling at me, Brian’s looking about the room, perhaps seeing if anything’s changed, and Freddie Mercury’s draped casually on the left of the only non-Queen member of the bunch.
But before I get into the past two years, maybe I should take you back a bit, to when Giselle and Queen began collaborating.
Giselle Jones began in the late sixties as the front-woman of a swing band in a thirties theme pub known as Modern Glamour. Tall, elegant, with a voice like honey, she had a small following of regulars that frequented the pub, but had kept her passion from music from her family, claiming she was merely a waitress at the establishment, since her father was an executive at EMI, and she didn’t want to seem like the subject of nepotism.
However, one fateful day, her father brings music industry giant to the pub for lunch, hoping to catch Giselle at work and introduce her, but as you know, they both got a lot more than they bargained for. Foster sees potential in her, and offers her a contract if she’s willing to modernise her act, and as we all know, she does.
When Giselle releases her first album in 1970, Velvet Roses, which would be the first and only “Jazz” record to hit the Top 40 charts for that year, Queen are still playing pub gigs around London, though they’re looking at recording their first album, which would eventually get EMI’s attention, but that’s still not for a while. At this point, they’re the biggest fish in a very small uni-pub pond, and they need the means to grow. So out goes the band’s van, for one night in a recording studio.
“Like, in retrospect, of course it was the right decision.” Taylor leans against the back of the sofa he’s sitting on in my office in 1982, voice contemplative and fingers locked together as he looks into the past. “But I was twenty-two at the time, selling my van was a big deal.”
“A big enough deal that you wrote a song about it.” Giselle adds, sitting beside him in the middle of the sofa. Deacon hides a smile though May doesn’t hide his snort of laughter.
The smirked remark is at odds with her look. While the boys are all in various states of brightly patterned shirts and jeans, looking casual and comfortable; Giselle wears white, sequinned, off-the-shoulder gown that hugs her figure and hits the floor, a slit in the thigh where her leg crosses, dark skin a stunning contrast to both the white fabric of her dress, and the leather of my sofa. Hands folded in over her knee, there’s not a singular hair out of place where she’s got it slicked back; I can’t look at her directly, she’s so focused and well put-together that it’s like staring at the sun.
The contrast has always been apparent in their various works, though Mercury has, in the past, cited her as an early inspiration for his desire to add a certain classical gravitas to rock and roll, and though she hasn’t publicly stated anything, the amount of covers Giselle has performed lived could fill an album. And now, here they are, about leave for a double-billed tour of the US, which I have been asked to join.
But their connection goes back much further than this, all the way back to 1975, to the release of the smash-hit single Bohemian Rhapsody That very same year, Giselle releases her fifth single, Dinner and a Show, a lyrically dissonant, heart pumping anthem that’s a metaphor for the way any type of review fuelled her, since it meant people were talking about her work.
You serve yourself on a platter; your putrid delights, / yet how can I refrain? / You don’t come to flatter, you don’t want to go / so come on baby, / don’t you know? / You’re treating me to dinner and a show.
Giselle’s usually silky performance is turned into a masterclass of vocal gymnastics as she slides easily from the rough intensity of rock and roll, to the smooth purr of jazz as she sings about eating critics for breakfast.
They say a free mind makes the meat so tender / now you’re on the menu and I’m a big spender
The song itself comes as a response to her former manager about how her “aggressive” move to music that more stylistically rock and roll was alienating older audiences, though Foster, still her producer at the time, was pushing for her to skew to a younger audience, and it seemed as though he had gotten his way.
The real change, however, was the B-Side of the record. After speaking to Jim “Miami” Beach, Queen’s lawyer, regarding potentially covering one of the band’s songs, Giselle reveals that she was eventually told to just ask them directly.
“I gave Miami a letter that basically explained that I’d like to cover one of their songs for my new album,” Giselle gives me a thin smile, and I feel like I’ve done something wrong, even though I’m assured by Brian that her public persona “is just like that sometimes”.
“- and I thought it was a joke! I said ‘yeah, sure, what’s the worst that could happen’.” Mercury laughs, leaning forward elbows on his knees and eyes shinning with amusement. “I did not believe for one second that Giselle, Giselle-” repeating her name for emphasis, his hand comes to quickly rest on hers where she still has them perfectly still on her knee, a moment of solidarity, “wanted anything to do with us. Hand Held Heart had been at the top of the US charts for almost three whole weeks the year before.” Letting out a long, wistful sigh, Mercury sits back, still grinning, though he’s got this far away look on his face now.
“So we’d been stuck on a farm, recording A Night At The Opera for weeks with no outside communications, ” May fills in where Mercury’s faded into his own memories, and Taylor slings arm around Giselle where she’s actually relaxed somewhat, hands now in her lap. Curiously, she doesn’t shrug him off. “And when we get back, it turns out that she’s put a jazz cover of Jesus, yeah, that song from our first album, on the B-Side of her newest single.”
“Freddie practically had a heart attack.” Deacon adds, patting Mercury’s shoulder fondly.
In her own way, she was continuing the trend that Dinner and a Show had started, and that seven-inch single would bestow upon Giselle the title of Queen of Jazz Rock. It hadn’t been the first time she had acknowledged the band publicly, by the time she had released the single, her public persona had gained enough traction that, a few months prior to her recording of the cover, a reporter had asked if Killer Queen, Queen’s biggest hit at the time, had been written about her. The question had been caught on camera by the reporter after one of her tour stops in the Midwest of America; the footage is a favourite of fans, including myself, of the way she doesn’t even turn, simply calls over her shoulder, ‘they should be so lucky’, and she gets into her waiting car.
“I never took offence,” Mercury tells me, both in 1982, and 1985, as I bring it up both times to consolidate the origins of their musical partnership.
“You wouldn’t, you were all starry-eyed for her back then.” Taylor leans back to address Mercury behind Giselle’s head, but only when he says it the first time, in 1982.
“It was a bit of a dig at us,” Deacon agrees with the drummer, nodding before shrugging. “A lot of good came out of it, though.” The others seem to agree, but Giselle herself has stayed quiet. For the first time since the interview started, she looks away from me, gaze dipping as she seems inclined to speak, though she takes her time to weigh up her words before she says them, wondering exactly what will and will not be printed.
“It was a bit of s**t thing to say. I was twenty-four and I panicked, I had to keep up my... this persona.” She gestures now to herself, breaking the entire physicality as she lets herself lean back, and I feel like I can breathe, seeing her act so human. Adjusting, she lets herself rest of the slightest of diagonals, shoulder to shoulder with Taylor’s arm still around her, now with Mercury petting her knee in solidarity.
Once in the tour bus, the difference between Giselle Jones, the woman, and Giselle, the singer and personality, becomes almost jarring to see. As soon as we get into the bus, she strips off the gown she was wearing, I turn away, though the others don’t seem to be bothered by it, May takes the dress to a waiting assistant by the door, and when I turn back, she’s in a pair of sweat pants and Taylor is tossing her shirt several sizes too big for her. For the first time since I’ve learned about her, Giselle looks comfortable, looks approachable and, for lack of a better word, non-robotic, taking a hairbrush from a drawer and flopping onto one of the beds as she brushes out the gel, apparently not bothering with a shower just yet.
“I showered this morning.” She seems to have caught my confused look, and explains herself. With her guard lowered in the familiar situation, her natural voice shines through, a rich, yet feminine alto, reminiscent of her singing voice. It adds to the list of things that add character to her beyond what her “persona” could ever convey. Or perhaps that’s the point.
The bus itself is almost too small for the five performers, and I’m certain it won’t fit me, but Giselle and I watch as they cram a blow up bed onto the kitchen table. It looks stable, and for the opportunity to experience living in such close quarters with such big names, I’d take anything.
“Sorry, darling, Paul takes the only spare bed.” Mercury informs me as I shimmy up onto the bed to test if it would hold. I had thought that the vehicle was at capacity, though it does make sense that the band’s day-to-day manager, Paul Prenter, would be travelling with them. That being said, I hadn’t realised there was even a spare bed, there was only five, perhaps none of them had wanted to be subjected to the blow up bed and decided to share instead.
When we finally get on the road, I get to finally see their true dynamics emerge. We all know the Queen dynamics by now, brotherly yet volatile, at times. I had worried for Giselle at times, the concept of living with four men (five if you count Prenter, who Giselle does not seem to, when I ask her about it, though I don’t think that’s a subject I should pry about, judging by the look on Taylor’s face where I can see him lounging at the back of the bus). However, I should have not have been worried; first of all, despite the youthfulness of their appearances, performances, and spirit, these are all men in their 30s, Giselle herself being 31 at the time of writing (1982), and they all have experience living with women, and with each other.
“First tour was a nightmare.” Deacon’s joined me on the blowup bed, is sipping tea as we travel along. “We learned real quick how disgusting close quarters can be.” He’s a quiet soul, but observant, and honestly I really enjoy his company. Anyone who can weather over a decade of rock and roll and come out as calm as him deserves some sort of recognition. “It’s much better now. Mostly.” He smiles like it’s an inside joke, but won’t elaborate. Giselle and Taylor refuse to clarify what he means by that, May just laughs when I ask him, directing me back to ask Taylor and Giselle, and Mercury calls them all gossips.
It’s something about the tour lifestyle that must bring out the childishness in them all, which comes out strongly during dinner. They shove my blowup bed into the sleeping quarters when dinner is served, and the five of us manage to cram into the tiny booth the bus allows. May, Deacon and Giselle are in charge of cooking dinner, sausages, potatoes, and peas, since apparently Prenter and Mercury have taken lunch duties, and Roger has put himself in charge of getting coffee and tea for everyone in the morning.
“We should really eat breakfast.” Giselle muses through half a mouthful of food.
“I do!” Deacon, next to me, comes back with, pouring some more peas onto his plate.
“You just eat cereal from the box, Deaky, that’s not breakfast.” Taylor counters him, which just causes the rest of the table to devolve into an argument about what counts as breakfast. Prenter, who has joined us for the meal, looks like he’d rather be napping or still driving, and makes quiet work of his meal.
Roger Taylor goes to sleep after me, and wakes up before I do, and I’m not sure how he does it. Or where he sleeps, the other beds seem taken. He wakes me up on the first morning by shoving my bed, which slides a few centimeters, but isn’t about to fall off it’s perch.
“You want coffee?” I’m barely functioning at this point, and his question baffles me. “Tea? Coffee? Deaky’s cereal? We got some left over sausages.” He lists off, probably due to my clear confusion, he seems exasperated, even though he’s definitely wearing pyjamas too. He’s still scowling a little when I tell him how I like my coffee, but he doesn’t complain, and it tastes exactly like I like it when he hands it over. The bus is stationary, so he can put the cups by the bedsides of those they are for, but interestingly enough he joins me on the table/bed.
I know the origin story of Queen, I think everyone does at this point, so I ask him instead about the subject of my article; how Queen got involved with Giselle.
“You wanna know how I met Giselle?” It’s not exactly what I asked, but he’s already thinking about it, looking past me to the sleeping quarters with a frown. He plays absent-mindedly with the chain around his neck, and with the ring attached to it. “I thought everyone knew about that, the whole thing where we hated each other from the start?” When I ask if it was true, he actually laughs, though it’s more a snort of derision, if I’m being honest. “Of course not. Mostly.” They all seem to like that word, I hadn’t taken them all to be vague.
“I told him to take a long walk off a short pier.” Giselle will clarify for me later that day, joining me as I take a smoke break at one of our bathroom stops, not that there isn’t a toilet on the bus, they just try to avoid using it as much as possible. She doesn’t smoke, claims she never has, but enjoys the company, while the boys are buying snacks at the gas station. I ask when it was, she gives me another thin smile, but not like it had been in the office. Here it’s the punctuation to an earlier joke rather than a judgement.
She tells me about how she actually met them all, recording her second album, after her 1972 performance on Top of the Pops, you know the one. It had cemented Giselle’s now iconic aesthetic of an off the shoulder, floor length sequinned gown, silk gloves, and bold red lipstick, dark hair falling victory curls, the whole look reminiscent of an old Hollywood star, though there was red glitter trailing from her lips, and on her gloves in a theatrical fabrication of blood. It had been a look inspired by her musical roots, and the theatricality of the then-popular glam rock, a movement which would inspire many of Mercury’s tour looks also.
She was twenty-one at the time, still “developing her persona”, when she found that the in-house recording equipment at EMI was being used by the then-still quite unknown Queen. Or rather, according to Giselle, just Taylor.
“He was packing up the last of his equipment, and he makes a pass at me, thinks I’m an intern.” We can see the boys leaving the gas station, Taylor himself heading the pack. “So yeah, told him to take a long walk off a short pier.” She laughs, seems to hold the memory quite dear. “That b******d has the gall to look me in the eyes and ask who I am.”
“Did he know who you were?” When I look at her, she’s still smiling, tipping her head to the side as the boys draw close. She seems to be paying attention to me, but not a lot.
“Yeah, told me later he was just pissed I didn’t throw myself at him. That’s why I said that, ‘they should be so lucky’ thing, actually, that motherf****r right there.” The way she says it, raising her finger to point at him, makes me think it’s a story she’s told before, one that he knows about.
“You talking about me?” Taylor yells, and Giselle is quick to answer that she is. “Don’t spill all my secrets.” It sounds like an order, but his smile says it’s not, it’s weirdly playful, a dynamic I didn’t expect from them, especially considering their history. I raise the point. She laughs at me.
“You’re kidding, right?”
Prenter calls for everyone on the bus, and Giselle doesn’t think to clarify once we’re back on board.
The tour, I should have mentioned earlier, is a double feature; Queen is promoting their album Hot Space, while Giselle is promoting her own, The Bend Before the Break. When I ask her about the album itself, she talks happily about a few of the songs, however when I bring up my personal favourites, Ache and Heaven Sent, she turns very quiet.
I will end up watching most of her performances, and to this day, I have never seen something as raw and spiritual as Giselle performing Ache.
The lights dim as the joyful Meant to Be finishes. On the studio recording, a double bass starts the song, long, grieving and angry notes that pick up in tempo as it’s joined by drums and a piano, and finally, her voice, low, bitter and seductive in equal measure. Here, there’s silence, as she gently croons the open lines, face illuminated by only a single gold light, as swirling red and purple lights move about the stage.
While saying you were sorry, / you burned me from the outside, in. / Now I’m calloused all over, / And too tired to feel the sting. / But I feel the ache, / feel the ache / feel the ache. / I’ll still let you back in.
She plays the piano herself for this song, a skill, I later learn Mercury had taught her many years ago. It’s a song that tugs at your gut, gets you thinking about how you keep people in your life who aren’t the best for you. She ends the last chorus with a long, mournful wail that you feel in your bones.
I’ve never heard a crowd so quiet as when she finishes Ache, the penultimate song of her set list, unless you count encores.
The final song of the night is always Heaven Sent, a bright, headbanging anthem with the musical gravitas of a full jazz band. It was her single from the album, it topped most charts. You know the one. The radio won’t stop playing it.
Divinity with a neon glow / it hung above his head, / promoting his next show. / Didn’t even try to find my light, / just the darkness he’d bestow. / Heaven sent me the Morningstar.
“I was cheated on.” Was all she will say about the songs.
The others steer clear of those songs as well, when talking about the album, as well as the titular song, The Bend Before the Break, though Giselle claims she has moved on from the feelings associated in all three songs.
“I wrote them first on the album, I’ve moved on.”
Each of the boys seems very protective of Giselle at times, though Taylor is by far the worst. If I’m being honest, was weird to me, they’d been at each other’s throats publicly and professionally for almost a full decade after Giselle’s initial comment, however the vitriol had died down in the past few years, so I enquire about that about halfway through the six week tour.
“We set them up.” May is the first to answer, sipping tea with myself, Deacon and Mercury. Since both Giselle and Taylor adjourned to the sleeping quarters. I ask him what he means.
“They tell it better.” Mercury interjects, but May argues that they’re asleep anyways so it’s not like it matters. Deacon agrees with Mercury, but quiet enough that May ignores him.
“So by ‘79, we’ve collaborated together, us and ‘Zelle, I mean,” the nickname is mostly used by May and Taylor, though Deacon uses it on occasion, “a couple of times, and we love her, right boys? We love her-” looking around, both Mercury and Deacon are nodding along, responding to a story they’d both heard before, though it was interesting for my first time hearing it, “but Rog is about ready to stab her with his drumsticks, but that’s just how he is.”
“Threatened to stab me once.” Deacon adds the unnerving information with complete serenity, focused on his cup.
“Me a couple of times.” Mercury shakes his head, as if it were some schoolboy prank rather than a stabbing threat.
“Like I said, just how he is. So we decide to send them to a place where they can bond over complaining about everything else, apart from each other.” I asked how it worked out for them and I watch as their faces fall. This terrible blind date idea must have gone horribly. “They hate the restaurant, which is good, but he goes to leave and bumps the table, spilling beer all over her dress, which is bad,” well, obviously. He pays me no mind, “and she elbows him in the face when she’s putting her jacket on - still don’t know how that one happened - but he still says he’ll take her home because it’s late, except-”
“To preface,” Deacon jumps in here, adding a little more milk to his tea, “she hates I’m In Love With My Car.” The song? Deacon nods. “Rog wrote it.” I can connect the dots, but I’m still confused as to how that lead to them being friends.
“Friends.” Mercury actually laughs into his cup.
“He takes her home anyways, she tells him the song’s s**t bu the sentiment wasn’t far off.” May finishes, shrugging.
“It was a real nice car.” Deacon shrugged, before looking straight at me. “And she still hates the song to this day.” There’s an air of finality to his words that is entirely unwarranted. That isn’t the point of the story; how are they friends now? Did they hook up in his car? Is that what they’re implying, I feel like such a gossip asking these questions.
“Did they ho- ? Yeah, of course.” May laughs, and though it clears some things up, I’m still rather confused. It’s probably reading on my face, because it looks like something else is dawning on him. “You know they’re married, right?”
No. No I did not know. Now I feel like an idiot.
I wonder if The Bend Before the Break is about Taylor? I can sense I’ve touched a nerve when I ask, and Mercury abruptly changes the subject, though the air still doesn’t feel right. When I head back through the sleeping area to get a new pen from my luggage, I catch a glimpse of Giselle napping in her bunk, Taylor too, asleep with his arm around her. She’s even wearing a wedding ring. I’m kicking myself for not noticing sooner. The chain with the ring around Taylor’s neck makes sense now. A lot of things make sense now.
For the next four days I feel like I’m being shunned, I’m the last to be told about dinner and have to eat the leftovers, Giselle barely says two words to me, Taylor just keeps glowering, and someone let the air out of my bed on the second night. It’s childish, but it’s in line with what I expect from them, regarding this sort of issue, I’m just glad Taylor hasn’t poured my coffee on me in my sleep, or spat in it. He just didn’t make it, which I suppose is probably the safest option for me.
The only apology I can think of is to offer to buy them all drinks, but it works well enough, and the next morning I wake to a fresh cup of coffee, and a very hungover Taylor. At least he’s dedicated to his job.
The rest of the tour passes without further incident. I still stand by Ache as one of my favourite musical performances of the decade, though I don’t mention it to Giselle, and now that I know the dynamic between her and Taylor, I can’t stop seeing it. Honestly, readers, they’re all over each other, which is expected from a man of Taylor’s reputation, but it’s still a little jarring to see the two of them so cozy. I must have been blind not to see it before.
When we part ways, Giselle is a little stiff with me.
“You brought up some feelings that I just... hadn’t actually dealt with at the time, which f******d me up.” She tells me in retrospect, sitting in my office with the rest of the boys in 1985. Live Aid was a few weeks ago, and since they all returned to the spotlight, I asked if they wanted to come and reflect on the past few years. The one thing that hasn’t changed is the fact that Giselle still swears like a sailor.
“A lot’s happened in the past few years.” Taylor’s still very protective of her, and after everything that’s conspired, at least from what I know, it’s warranted. We talk about the band splitting, how it had hurt the band as a whole, and even Giselle, who was at the time seeing a counsellor with Taylor. I’m hesitant to broach the topic of their relationship, though they seem like a solid until now, sitting before me, holding hands and leaning against one another.
I ask if Giselle’s breakdown was due to the band splitting, though I’m hesitant if I’ll get a response. Her smile is sad, which is mirrored by the rest of the band. I can guess her response before she says it.
“No.”
You all know the moment I’m talking about, the last concert for her last album, as of this publication, Finally, Sunlight where she had receive pleas from the audience for an encore. When she came back out, part of her makeup had been smudged around her eyes, and you can hear her sniffle over the microphone. (”I’m so sorry, I lost someone close to me, I thought I could keep it together for one night.” Dabbing at her eyes, she sits at the piano and laughs, but there’s no heart in it. “But I’ve got five more minutes left in me, let’s go, Atlanta.”) The song she plays is Somebody to Love, a slow, soulful cover, and the audience is almost unanimous in their raised lighters and slow swaying. As she goes on, she just starts crying harder, missing notes, hands shaking; the extended ‘Looooord’ before the chanting becomes a desperate wail, a plea to the heavens, and she collapses onto the piano, sobbing audibly as the instruments all come to uncertain halt and lighters go down in confusion.
From the crowd, a single voice begins to chant ‘Find me somebody to love. / Find me somebody to love.’ and a single voice turns to a theatre, full to the brim, as they sing when she can’t, still crying against the piano. Lighters go up, and together the audience and the band finishes the song where words have failed her. It was televised locally on the night, and still brings me to tears when I watch it now.
“We lost our daughter.”
For those of you reading this who are shocked, I am too. Sitting there like a fool, not saying anything.
“I was on tour, and Rog was at home with her,” even now, Giselle is getting a little teary-eyed, not that I blame her. Both Taylor and Mercury have an arm around her, and May has a hand on her shoulder, Deacon sitting on the back of the sofa right behind her. A unit. A family. “I wanted to go home, she was getting really sick, and I know he was doing everything he could, but I just- I wanted to be there... but my label threatened to sue me for... millions.” It sounds like it’s hard to say, and she’s wiping a tear from her eyes. I offer her the tissues on my desk. “But I should have gone home. I should have been there by her side, I should have done more.” Taylor whispers something to her and she leans against him, taking comfort in him.
“I had to call her, tell her that... that she’d passed. The day of the show. She’d been so upset for week, ‘Zelle that is, and everything just-” Taylor manages to get a great handle on his emotions, despite his misty eyes and shaking hands. “We’re alright now though, see? Nothing can tear us apart.” Though his voice does drop, so I think he’s saying it more for Giselle’s benefit. I give them all time to collect themselves, stop to get hot drinks for everyone, and everyone finally seems happy enough to answer when I ask what’s next for them.
“Music, of course.” Mercury says, now holding what was Giselle’s free hand. The rest of the gathered musicians agree. I ask if we’ll be hearing any sort of collaboration between Queen and the Queen of Jazz Rock. Taylor snickers, pulling Giselle close.
“Yeah, but not in the way you mean.” He ignores the rest of the men’s shouts of disgust, as well as his wife’s own gagging noise, which I can see on her face she regrets as she covers her mouth with caution, before giving the okay.
“No, we’re okay, we’re good.” She assures everyone, before looking at me. “What he meant to say is that I’m pregnant.” She clarifies. Taylor is still grinning.
“Don’t be gross, Rog.” May calls from the other side of the sofa, and Taylor has the gall to look accosted.
“What’s next for me, after everything that’s happened, is family.” Giselle says over the sounds of her husband’s indignant huffs, though his expression turns soft at her words, and they ignore the ‘boo’s of everyone else as they kiss.
“Could you be less gross around company?” Deacon asks, still mild-mannered as ever. This seems to be the cue for the interview to end, as Taylor of Giselle-
“It’s Giselle Taylor, by the way, I’m sorry I hadn’t corrected you earlier.” She corrects me now, as [Roger] Taylor leads her out of the door. The rest of the band seem mildly exasperated at their antics, but still ready to answer my questions. After everything that’s happened, I’m a little overwhelmed, I’m not sure where to go from here.
Perhaps my next article will be on Live Aid.
#roger taylor#roger taylor imagine#roger taylor x oc#queen#bohemian rhapsody#borhap#bo rhap#queen imagine#freddie mercury#brian may#john deacon#the angry lizard writes#bohemian rhapsody imagine
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hey -- person with the pescetarian boyfriend again! thank you so much for the wonderful resources!! they really did help things on the environmental front. my bf has now claimed that i am putting the lives of fish over people who are dependent on the industry and doesn't think it's economically feasible for that to ever not be the case. i do not think the economical feasibility of a practice justifies something like this -- (1/2)
(2/2) – i fully believe that people dependent on commercial fishing don’t have to be dependent on it forever, he disagrees and thinks that it’s economically impossible and means i don’t care about the people who work in these fields. i think the industry should end, but i’m struggling to make my argument more than just idealistic since i don’t know the economics. have you ever had to argue something like this before/do you have some economic-related sources? thanks for all your help!
So first I think it’s important to recognise that your boyfriend has no completely switched his reasoning for why he is defending fishing, and it’s important that you make him acknowledge the fact that this is now an entirely new argument. People tend to not acknowledge when they’re wrong and just quickly switch arguments, so pin him down to his previous points before you let him start a whole new argument.
Now, for the points he’s made, if he’s talking about people who are dependent upon fishing for food then these are legitimate but they are only a good defence for sustenance fishing, not commercial fishing. You’re advocating the end of the commercial fishing industry, you’re not arguing that indigenous people reliant on fishing for food need to immediately go vegan. Besides, it is commercial fishing which is emptying the oceans and making it increasingly difficult for those people to survive- does the fact that they are dependent on fishing not matter just because commercial fishing is also dependent on the profit they make from fishing? I know which one most people would agree is more important.
If he’s arguing that fishing is justified on the basis that workers and companies rely on it for profit, then that is not a good defence for either one. Plenty of industries which we now morally oppose were economically reliant on exploitation, that money is being made and jobs created is not a good reason to continue an industry which is harming the planet. As stated earlier too, this industry is desroying the livelihood of those who actually do need to fish. I’ve responded to a similar argument here which may help you.
Keep in mind though, that the argument you’re having with him is that he should not be eating fish, not indigenous people, and not even that the industry shouldn’t exist. Is he seriously trying to argue that he eats fish because he believes in supporting the fishing industry, this enterprise which is destroying our environment and completely demolishing natural ecosystems? I can almost guarantee that what is actually happened here is that your boyfriend just likes eating fish and is trying to find reasons to justify that, which is sort of already evidenced by the fact that he’s already completely changed his reasoning for why he is doing it. When he comes up with his next argument (and he will) be sure to pin him down to why he specifically is continuing to eat fish; it’ll be a much more productive conversation.
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HS Epi: Meat p12 reaction
Back to Earth C presumably.
I gotta say, I'm curious to find out the final page count of Meat. The way we liveblog, the experience is stretched out, so with theories surfacing and such, we might be caught off guard when things are really over. There's only so far that things will be taken, though I guess we're still in for those "original Male/Female characters", I guess. :P That shouldn't refer to the new Reload timeline John created, I think, with copies of all the people mentioned in the rest of the character list. So, uh, yeah, guess the reason Arquiusprite wasn't mentioned in there was because he remained unseen, voided out if you will. And I guess we shouldn't expect an alternate Equius to have a talking role, either?
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==>
Well! Talk about jumping straight into the action, this page opens with a dialoguelog! Back to Dave, Karkat and if my eyes didn't deceive me, we'll get some lines for Jade, too! Supportive Jade will be supportive.
"hit jane right in her neoliberal austerity measures" ... Hah. Well, I didn't think that would get referenced again at all, but it seems after all these years since John's 18th birthday Dave still has issues with the ol' N.A.M. So, Jane's a neoliberal AND a fascist now, Dave? Is that... even feasible?
"DAVE: now shes gonna spin some shit about supply side economics but we cant let her control the narrative on that one cause the first thing thats gonna happen once she begins deregulating the baking industry is that some sweet dumb crocodile down in consort land is gonna start putting sparkle glue in the cupcake mix which isnt even the real issue thats just surface issues KARKAT: RIGHT. JADE: definitely" ... Like, Dave I admire you're getting so into this, but you realize they aren't following, right? Also, why would Jane want to deregulate the baking industry if she's the leader of the foremost power in said industry, as well as running for president? Plus, Jane can't control the narrative because Caliborn is already controlling it! :mspa:
"DAVE: i mean earth c has just been play acting capitalism the last five thousand years while we timeskipped ahead to live rad lives as gods without bothering with any of the boring shit that goes into making a civilization DAVE: which is fine i mean you cant really expect a bunch of teens who didnt finish middle school to set up a sustainable form of social democracy that isnt just blatantly ripped off whatever we incorrectly thought obama god rest his soul was doing back in the day" ... Gee, Dave's given this a real lot of thought. Props to him, but I hope that aside from becoming 'an activist' he's also got some legitimite action points to improve Earth C's situation.
Guess Sburb really does a number on players, huh? "Congrats, you won, you're all gods now, and also, here's this whole civilization on the brink of collapse, have fun with that. Don't mess this up, I need those people to start the apocalypse in say, 2000 years, k thx bye." (The fact that this civilization, being outside of the Green Sun's influence, may never implement Sburb, is a bit besides the point since I think the trolls would have had the same issue tossed onto them had they actually gone through the victory door.)
Right, but the trolls had their home planet already effectively run by children, I wonder if that will come again? Even though they had carpenter droids at their disposal to run some things for them, they might actually be a bit more self-reliant than the humans!
"DAVE: but janes got this old school mentality you just know she wants to restrict grist alchemy for the sake of “growth” and when that goes down itll take three seconds flat for some nobody in new dersetown to drop the earth c communist manifesto" ... New Dersetown, I like the ring of that. Would call it New Dersey for short, though. :P Again, valid points there, Dave! If any revolt started, it doesn't have to be in the troll community, it could just as much be an angry carapace uprising! They're only docile if there's no one to rally behind.
Blaperile has this idea that the new society in a universe is not supposed to be seeded with the remains of the session nor the universe that came before it. That's actually a valid point; the only reason this society got kickstarted was through the cloning apparatus that was on the meteor! The consorts and carapaces seem like they would be able to reproduce biologically though, so I'm not sure how Sburb normally ensures the planet is a clean slate for a new species to emerge. ... Okay, so the planet itself doesn't really need to be the place where a new Sburb-playing species rises, true. There's a whole new universe out there.
Maybe through "importing" old Sburb technology, the "alpha" planet designation went to Earth C automatically, though.
Or maybe First Guardians are expected to 'cleanse' the planet from outside influence normally, but since this society's outside of the Green Sun's influence, that ain't happening. And Jade won't be going Thanos on Earth C.
"KARKAT: OH YEAH. JADE: of course DAVE: are you two even listening or are you just making noises with your mouths" Dave realizing he's monologuing? What character development is this. :O
"KARKAT: I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M BEING ACCUSED BY DAVE STRIDER, REIGNING EMPEROR OF SPEWING ENDLESS VERBAL DIARRHEA DIRECTLY INTO MY INNOCENT HEAR DUCTS EVERY DAY OF MY FUCKING LIFE, OF MAKING THOUGHTLESS MOUTH NOISES. KARKAT: JADE, ARE YOU HEARING THIS? JADE: im scandalized JADE: especially when JADE: there are much better things we could all be doing with our mouths....." ... Jade, your animes are showing again. ... I think that maybe Jade doesn't want this relation to be going where Dave and Karkat want it to go.
"It’s been a really nice day they’ve been having, and then Jade had to go say something like that. The air in the hive changes in a way that is palpable, in a way that she can’t seem to accurately gauge despite having both superhuman and superdog senses." ... Ah. So I guess maybe Jade just can't get a lid on some of her more... canine inclinations, at time. Welp!
"Elements of her outfit resemble her god tier jammies: peasant skirt, sparkly flats, and a bold choice in striped tights." Nice! That's only the third person who created an outfit based on her god tier outfit that we know, aside from Meenah and Rose.
"the couch where she crashed last night, and the night before that, and the better part of the seven years before that." It would seem Jade has the wanderlust then, she's more like the vagrant dog that comes visiting from time to time? More GCAT in demeanor than Becquerel, in practice. Heheh. Good for her, after being isolated on an island and then a battleship for so long, she's finally going out & seeing things!
"There are other personal effects of hers in the living room too: plants on the windowstill, her bass guitar sitting in a corner" Cool, so when she comes over, she typically lounges here then. Guess the flute never made it over, though. :p
"a horrific-looking periodic table that Dave made her for her seventeenth birthday pinned above the stairwell. He typed it in Comic Sans, and then deep-fried it to oblivion with JPEG artifacts." ... Next up, on For Fans By Fans...
"And Dave, with his preternaturally perfect timing, sweeps a hand over his tablet to bring up a new PowerPoint slide on the TV. He returns to his Comic Sans-written political presentation, gruesome artifacts and all" Dave, Dave that isn't professional at all!
", with the grace and proficiency of a man who has diffused an awkward situation in his own household many times per day, every day, for many years." Well, okay, that is really mature. But when Dave is the adult in a situation, the situation is very awkward per definition.
"DAVE: alternia: brutal eugenics based space dictatorship KARKAT: NOT UNTRUE." Succinct, brutal, but not dishonest.
"DAVE: troll homeworld: lord of the flies nightmare scenario where kids murder each other just to get the chance to get to grow up and murder other aliens instead KARKAT: IT WASN’T THAT BAD." Karkat. Karkat that isn't a valid rebuke.
"KARKAT: YOU MADE THAT LAST ONE UP. KARKAT: ALSO, IT WAS DISGUSTING?? KARKAT: GROW THE FUCK UP, YOU UTTERLY CONTEMPTIBLE, POTTY MOUTHED *CUNT*." ... The irony is stark.
"JADE: also you know trolls dont actually have two dicks dave thats an offensive stereotype" Are we really doing troll anatomy? Well, I guess it's good to know that the fan theory about Sollux at least isn't applicable to the entire species.
"DAVE: trolls: literally ate babies KARKAT: ONLY THE DEFECTIVE ONES. DAVE: like you my dude KARKAT: ...YEAH. DAVE: so thats why our campaign can work" Yeah, Karkat ate grubs, though they weren't troll babies. Also, yeah, Karkat was a mutant, but I wonder if that would really help his case here.
"DAVE: btw im gonna be giving a long form exam at the end of this to make sure youre retaining info because this is only like the most important thing weve ever done collectively" Well he ain't wrong.
"KARKAT: ARE YOU ASKING ME WHETHER I’VE HEARD THIS EXACT SPEECH ALMOST WORD FOR WORD, INCLUDING REHEARSED VERSIONS OF BOTH THE COLORFUL METAPHORS AND “JOKES,” TEN OR TWENTY TIMES ALREADY? KARKAT: BECAUSE THE ANSWER WOULD BE KARKAT: YES, OF COURSE I FUCKING HAVE." Poor, poor Karkat.
"Karkat elbows Dave in the thigh, a move that is obviously meant to be an action of pure, brotherly jest. But instead it comes off as affectionate and overly intimate. Jade’s clever eyes don’t miss this. Her pupils follow the motion of Karkat’s arm, and then they follow the movement of Dave’s mouth as he smiles in what he probably thinks is a totally neutral expression that reveals exactly 0% of his true feelings toward Karkat Vantas. In reality, his veneer is as thin and transparent as cellophane. He is the only person who can’t see through it.
Jade does some calculations in her head. Two kinds of calculations, in fact: mathematical ones and personal ones." So, is Jade reading too much into their relationship, or are the dudes just... Both too shy?
"JADE: soooooo JADE: do you want a projection of her first years hit on the economy down to the decimal with a 0.3% margin of error JADE: because thats a thing i can do if itll make you stop talking about this stupid election for ten minutes" I didn't know that were First Guardian powers! :p I suppose it might be her natural intellect though, but we've only known her as the hands-on science type until now.
"She proceeds to dazzle the two boys with explications on complex math utilizing taxation rates, GDP figures, and some damned thing called the “Laffer curve,”" Dang, Jade is as much committed to this as Dave! (Or maybe she learned all this because it means so much to him, that could be it too!)
"The thing about Jade Harley is that she’s not as good at personal things as she is at other things. Like science, or mastering fraymotifs, or kissing, the last of which she has definitely put a lot of levels into over the past few years because, well, what else are you supposed to do with immortal godhood once you hit the age where the dog hormones start kicking into overdrive?" Guess for dogs, kissing isn't that personal. :p And well, I guess Jade's only now learning the real consequences of turning into a real-life furry. At least she won't have had lack of candidates to practice kissing with. She might even have become the Witch of Spacing Out Young Adults.
"Her high-prescription lenses make her eyes look anime-huge. They might literally be glittering, she’s so completely serious about the issue she is trying to stress." And the fan artists rejoiced for all the new descriptions they have to work with!
" JADE: im about to lay out some cold hard evidence so pay attention! KARKAT: OH, HANG ON, LET ME GET A PEN." You can't live together with Dave for years without learning when it's time to start taking notes and grab a fucking pen.
"JADE: evidence about..... JADE: our relationship! KARKAT: FUCK" Pfff, okay, never mind. I think Jade might have hit a wall several times over before, trying to either define their relationship or take it to the next level. These dudes are really sensitive about their feelings, after all.
But it would be interesting, learning Jade wants to know where they stand just as much as the outside world does.
"JADE: you let me live in your hive when im in town KARKAT: I CAN’T BELIEVE... JADE: im preeeetty intimately entwined in both your lives KARKAT: THAT YOU’RE JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS? JADE: AND you dont disengage from about 86.234% of my flirtations KARKAT: WAIT, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU KEEP TRACK OF SOMETHING LIKE THAT? JADE: so....... are we doing this or not?" So, just like with taking on Lord English and acknowledging the lit fuse that is Earth C society, I guess the coming around of April 13th 2019 is when Jade had enough of all this silly business and wants to know what's what. (Also, I suppose the level of intimacy they shared on beforehand will be left to speculation.)
"KARKAT: DOING WHAT?! JADE: dating dummy!!!!!!!! KARKAT: OH. KARKAT: THAT IS KARKAT: THAT IS... A COMPLICATED TOPIC IN MY CULTURE THAT I’M NOT SURE HUMANS ARE EQUIPPED TO TALK ABOUT." Smooth, Karkat, real smooth. Maybe Karkat fears commitment will lead to some of their relationships shifting into other quadrants. And he wouldn't like to be moirails or auspistices with either of them.
"DAVE: also totally unrelated to the economy" ... Nice try Dave, but I think this can't be steered back into that track.
"DAVE: which not gonna lie is the only thing i want to talk about for uh DAVE: for however long it takes for this other conversation to stop happening JADE: so say no!!! DAVE: well KARKAT: UHHHHH JADE: im not just forcing this conversation for my sake! its for you two as well JADE: i mean after all this time have you two even kissed yet?????? DAVE: wha" I think Dave and Karkat might actually have been both content to stay uncommitted and fearful to put a label on it. Also Jade's question will presumably remain unanswered, it's already surprising it's confirmed she hasn't seen them kissing. And that is ignoring the matter of whether either Dave or Karkat kissed Jade before. I guess it's only fortunate for this situation that this instance of Jade never dated Davesprite, it would only complicate things further.
"DAVE: wha KARKAT: WH-WHY WOULD DAVE: uhh KARKAT: WHY WOULD WE KISS?? DAVE: thats KARKAT: THAT’S... YOU... I MEAN, HE’S... HE’S DAVE. DAVE: we KARKAT: AND I’M KARKAT." PFffffffff, hilarious! I can just see them blushing like tomatoes right now. Can't keep staying in denial bros!
"JADE: yes hes dave and youre karkat and everyone we know always calls you that JADE: “dave and karkat”" Hah! Yeah, but they also think you're part of the item, Jade. Care to shed some thoughts on the subject?
"JADE: i cant remember the last time i heard anyone mention one of you without the other JADE: the two of you have basically been together since your days on the meteor its SO obvious" Jade has turned this from a personal matter into a fandom matter. "Everyone and their dog knows you're dating, guys! Stop pretending otherwise!" It's interesting to note the different ways Dave has been seen handling relationships. When he dated Terezi in the GO timeline, it went south due her troubles in the black quadrant. When Davesprite dated Jade, it went south due to unresolved Dave issues, presumably having to do with his bros. With Karkat, Dave's been in a stable-ish thing for the longest time, though.
" KARKAT: VERY CLOSE FRIENDS WHO UNDERSTAND AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER ON A DEEP AND EMPATHETIC LEVEL THAT GOES BEYOND HATE OR PITY. YOU COULD EVEN SAY THAT OUR RELATIONSHIP... KARKAT: ...TRANSCENDS QUADRANTS." ... PFfffffff, so this could have been what it was like for the Sufferer and the Disciple, then! They were just never ready to commit? That would actually be funnier than it being this deep and fulfilling relationship. It would also make Doc Scratch' misgivings on the relationship even more hilarious.
"JADE: yeaaaaaah not gonna lie karkat but that sounds totally kinda gay KARKAT: UGH YOU HUMANS AND YOUR UNFATHOMABLE GENDER BASED QUADRANTS." ... Heh. Actually. Too trolls, the whole gender-based romance thing we have going must indeed be as unfathomable as leprechaun romance.
"Jade faceplams." Well that's a new verb. ;) What part of the body is the 'plam', exactly?
" KARKAT: ANYWAY WEREN’T YOU... DATING THAT CARAPACIAN COUPLE? LAST TIME WE CHECKED?" Lolwut. Jade. Jade are you... are you being a Ms. Casanova, a paramour or two in every city you frequent? If WV and PM turn out to be alive for the sole purpose of dating Jade, I'll choke on my drink.
" DAVE: wait you saying we arent fun JADE: whens the last time either of you left the house??????" I know Jade means it as in, she'd like to date them for keeps. But I also fulheartedly believe Dave and Karkat can sustain themselves on delivery pizza and chinese chow.
"In her other hand, she tries to grab Dave’s wrist, but he flash-steps to the other side of the couch." Well that's a new use of the power, guess Dave must really have felt alarmed. :p
"JADE: i wanna try dating for real KARKAT: HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED KARKAT: SORRY IF WHAT I’M ABOUT TO SAY TOTALLY BLOWS YOUR MIND KARKAT: DATING A SINGLE PERSON, FOR MORE THAN HALF A SWEEP, FOR REASONS OTHER THAN INITIATING THE CONCUPISCENT EXCHANGE OF FLUIDS?" Karkat is trying to throw the issue back into Jade's face by saying she should try dating for a longer period of time. But that's exactly what she's trying to do here! She knows who she wants that with! That poor little troll, he's not getting out from under this.
"JADE: third of all karkat arent you from a culture where people are expected to engage in romantic relationships with up to like five people at a time?? KARKAT: THAT’S NOT KARKAT: THAT’S NOT THE SAME THING AT ALL." If he's trying to avoid getting dragged into quadrants with people, he should stop upholding the validity of the quadrants to hold people off. :p
"DAVE: ok jade i think theres a flaw in your approach here cause you seem to think winning an argument on super clever logical grounds is gonna get a couple dudes to break down and fling themselves at you in like, a sexual way JADE: wellll it usually does ;B DAVE: oh my fucking god" So she swoons people by way of her big brain. Jade's got CLASS.
"This earns Dave a look. A long, sad one that has Jade messing with her glasses again so that she can peer right at him and apply some more of that faulty personal math to his facial expression." Just confirmation here that Jade isn't necessarily correct in all her assessments due to not being objective.
"JADE: dave are you in love with obama? DAVE: jade jesus where do you get this shit from JADE: is it about jesus then??????" Aaaaaand this has been derailed again.
"DAVE: no! DAVE: jesus wasnt even real JADE: i know he wasnt real! JADE: wait... JADE: are you saying JADE: obama was real? DAVE: ... DAVE: yes" Wut. Wai- I- Jade. Honey. Please. Guess for all her involvement in politics since, those isolated years on the island sheltered her WAY too much.
"DAVE: obama was real DAVE: he was the president KARKAT: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA JADE: all this time i thought obama was like JADE: an aspirational fictional character that you modeled your life after KARKAT: AHAHAHAHA I CAN’T AHAHA BREATHE... JADE: like snoop dog or nicolas cage" ... Jade. Jade no. You're just making this worse on yourself. For Jade, there would have been almost nothing in Homestuck she'd have seen as a reference to 'real life', would there?
"senary numeral systems that allow me to do complex equations in my head" ... Why is Base 6 good for complex equations? I'm probably not good enough at math to know.
"KARKAT: WHY IS IT LIKE SOME SORT OF *TRAGEDY* HOW SHE WAS RAISED? KARKAT: BECAUSE SHE WAS RAISED ALONE BY AN ANIMAL?? KARKAT: *I* WAS RAISED ALONE BY AN ANIMAL!" There! It's getting acknowledged again, how Jade's upbringing more resembles a troll than a human's! Becquerel the lusus.
"There’s a ripple in the room that makes it clear their god tier powers have just clashed against each other. He shifts his arm through time and Jade warps the space around them so that she’s the one holding the tablet. This is not the first time that they have rearranged the fabric of reality for a petty reason like this. Karkat has permanently sworn off playing board games with them." ... Lol. First real use of the god tier powers in Earth C, and it goes like this! Wait, couldn't Jade have snapped... Right, no, she actually wouldn't have First Guardian powers anymore now, I forgot. Still, what did Dave try to do, move the tablet to another point in the timeline?
"The moment Jade brings the paint program up on the television, Karkat stops laughing. KARKAT: NO!" Oh boy. Time for the Penis Quadrant scene, this time with three people. ... This would actually fall under both definitions of a "sketch", actually.
"He tries to grab the tablet from her, but she’s hovering well above the ground and he simply is not tall enough to reach. With a shit-eating grin and deliberate care, Jade begins to draw a grid." He's going to jump up to grab her leg, to disturb the drawing, isn't he?
"She gives Karkat a pair of fuzzy, angry eyebrows" Now I'm starting to think of the Karkat expressions in that one Paradox Space.
"all he accomplishes is turning the redrom trajectory between her and Dave into a redrom loop-de-loop." This is all I could want from a reprise of this scene.
"JADE: see me and karkat have great black chemistry! KARKAT: IT IS NOT BLACK CHEMISTRY YOU HORRID NON-CHITINOUS WINDBAG!" A+ denial there, Karkat, props on the response.
"JADE: and now that daves all chill hed make a great auspistice" Jade just wants all Karkat's quadrants filled by the three of them, somehow.
"JADE: because you and karkat are kind of like moirails DAVE: no JADE: and you and i JADE: well yknow its always been pretty flirty DAVE: jade JADE: EXCEPT!
Jade finishes drawing a shaky heart directly into the paint program. It’s so big and bright on the TV that it fills the entire room with red light." She's putting all these names and symbols to the relationship, it might just be too much for these poor boys to handle. :p
"JADE: i call this political arrangement: JADE: fully automated luxury polyamorous space-time communism!!!!!!!" That is not the shipping name I would've chosen, but it's the shipping name we deserve. And hey, communism! Get it? Cause Karkat had a sickle.
I wonder what Karkat's take on polyamory outside of the ashen quadrant is, actually.
"Jade rolls her eyes and tosses both the tablet and pen over her shoulder. Dave flashes across the living room to catch his very expensive computing device in both arms. The pen bounces off his forehead." This. Entire. Scene.
"JADE: i have to go talk to roxy and callie about the election anyway" Well, she's going to let them stew on this for a while. But I'm eager to find out who Roxy & Calliope would back. You might think Jane's a given, but if she's been busy maybe they have grown closer to Jade & Dave!
"Jade clicks her heels together to propel herself back into the air and actually winks at them before absconding through an open window." Think happy thoughts! Also, I just realized becoming a god sadly never gave Karkat the powers of flight.
"Dave and Karkat both stare after her, silently caught in their own private rationalization spirals.
Karkat needs to verbalize part of his out loud." Ah, but can they stay in that spiral or will they have no choice but to break out of it?
"KARKAT: WANNA PLAY SOME TROLL TONY HAWK? DAVE: hell DAVE: yeah" Yyyyyeaah, they are not going to have changed when Jade comes back, will they?
So even Karkat calls it "Troll Tony Hawk", not whatever absurdly wrong name it'd have on Alternia, and not whatever Tony Hawk's duodecimal name in Alternian would be. :P
#homestuck#homestuck epilogues#upd8#reaction#spoiler alert#jade harley#karkat vantas#dave strider#homestuck liveblog
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2018 Game of the Year Top Ten List I guess
2018 has been an interminable mire of exhausting miasma and quite frankly I feel like it has been longer than the entire stretch of 2010-2015 combined. I also didn't play many games released this year because, like last year, I'm still poor. I'll see what I can dig up.
10. Sunset Overdrive PC edition: It's a fun open world game by insomniac. The PC Port is actually balls but like. It's a good game with a unique emphasis on how you traverse the game world, where you can grind and bounce on just about anything and indeed to do so is the only way to not get totally chewed up by the hordes of mutants and scavengers and robots you have to fight. There's also some pretty fun and out there weapons to use, like a gun that shoots vinyl records or one that deploys little auto-turrets kept aloft with propellers or one that shoots out a bowling ball at terminal velocity. The base game didn't actually come out this year (I dont... think it did...?) but it was an XBone exclusive so I didn't play it then. It's got some weird problems with narrative tone and some kind of out of the blue racism but the M rated Nickolodeon toy commercial aesthetic is charming in a weird way. I guess.
9. The Forest: I think this got an official release this year? I don't know I can't fucking keep track. Speaking of a game with weird problems with racism, if you can look past the garbage "main quest" and really deeply uncomfortable racial politics where you murder and steal from cannibal mutants, The Forest is probably the best cool treefort building simulator I've ever played. This game has a love affair with lumber and I respect that. Shouldn't you be looking for Timmy, you ask me? Shouldn't you be shutting the fuck up before I put this airplane axe in your skullmeats? Gazebos are nice. I guess.
8. Spyro: reignited trilogy: haven't actually played this yet but let's be real the spyro games were fucking dope back in the day and giving them an HD coat of paint and packaging them all together is a real standup thing for insomniac to do in between slinging webs and making questionable pc ports. Also its like Dark Souls so it has to be good, right? Everything old is new again. I guess.
7. Super Smash Bros. Ultimate: haven't played this one either but like. I know that I am a smash-enjoyer. I even liked Brawl. This is the biggest, smashiest one yet and it's also on the switch which means it could also be portable if I decided I never wanted to leave my bed again. I'm probably going to find some money to get it soon. Should be fun. I guess.
6. The Quiet Man: look no game that is THIS hysterical can be all bad alright? Didn't play it. Won't play it. It's awful. But it's so fucking funny like oh my god. Still better than Fallout 76. I guess.
5. Dark Souls Remastered: was this even a good remaster? I don't fucking know. It's Dark Souls. It's better than 90% of released games by default. I miss Solaire of Astora. I guess there's Shadows Die Twice to look forward to. I guess.
4. Subnautica: I wrote a lot about this actually. Subnautica is great. Just fantastic. A wonderful, visually stunning (mostly) (when it works) journey under an alien ocean to unravel an ancient mystery behind a deadly plague. Building seabases is so much fun (when it doesn't hard crash your computer) and the peaceful playstyle you adopt where you really only kill things for food until you can grow your own, much more efficient produce is a welcome change of pace from everything else. Leviathans are scary, especially now that your cyclops is mortal and not indestructible. This game actually Came Out this year so it deserves to be on the spot. I guess.
3. Dragon Ball Fighterz: Honestly I'm hell trash garbage at fighting games that aren't smash but this was a very well put together, visually impressive as all hell fast paced tag fighter where you can have 3 gokus on the same team fight 3 other gokus on the same team. Goku density alone makes this game worth recommending. The eSports scene that has popped up around it is fun too. I guess.
2. Dead Cells: Another game that gets to be on the list by virtue of it actually coming out this year. Wait, was this on last year's list? Let me check. Ok good it wasn't. Early access is a fucking trip. It's fun, stylish, challenging, has a great deal of variety in ways to play, might have erased my entire save because it became obsolete and I'm definitely not bitter, and it has that classic rogue-lite replay value to give you some bang for your buck. There was that one review plagiarism scandal. I guess.
1. Monster Hunter World: If you really want to know what I think of this game my previous piece on it is a good place to start. In addition to everything said there, MHW is just a fun game. The loop is satisfying and, later on, quite challenging. The combat system takes some genuine getting used to and some monsters like Nergigante actually literally cheat but for the most part the game's unique fighting style, spread across several unique weapon types, is rewarding to learn because it demands some effort be put into it and the dividends of fighting well are very cool, like just knocking a flying monster on its ass with a single mighty swing of the hammer. When a game is hard in any capacity games journalists get dollar signs in their eyes and start drooling uncontrollably because they can immediately declare that Farm Sim 2020 is the next Bloodborne because they somehow managed to roll their tractor into a ditch, but MHW is actually quite similar in style and execution to deliberate Souls combat, but the comparison is made in reverse. Dark Souls is quite similar to Monster Hunter, the first game of which was popular and a couple of years old before Demon's Souls was even a twinkle in Miyazaki's eye. There's a lot of parallels between fighting a big ol' rathalos in monhun and going for the toes against a dragon in Dark Souls, but I think MHW actually does that kind of fight better. There are a lot of modern conveniences present in MHW that are a godsend to newer players, making the game pretty easy to get into if you're willing to try. It was my favorite game of the year that actually came out in 2018. I kind of wanted to put Warframe in this list but it's been out of early access for years now. I guess.
There were a lot of games this year that I wanted to play, but couldn't. I don't think 2018 was a weak year for video games. It wasn't as strong as 2017 but it had some hits, I just couldn't afford to play them all. Maybe next year I'll be able to give a better list. I think that the whole industry is in for some hard choices and major restructuring of how things get done and how they look at the end result. Stocks continue to trend downward - not just for Bethesda but for most mainstream, prominent AAA developers like EA and Take2. Given the well documented volatility of "The Shareholders", I imagine that they would be most displeased by downward trends even if they were still making a modest profit.
The situation has been likened to an economic bubble ripe for bursting. Games as a cultural institution have come a long way since the catastrophic days of Atari's warehouses of unsold copies of E.T., and I don't believe that we're in any danger of a complete collapse of the institution, but the fact absolutely remains That Something's Gotta Give. The increasingly predatory practices that game developers put in place as they pathologically attempt to Make Every Money Ever are intrinsically unsustainable. People are willing to forgive and overlook the now ubiquitous microtransaction if a game is good enough to overlook it, or if it's the game's only real way of actually making money. Warframe's microtransactions, for instance, are reasonably priced, platinum is often heavily discounted as a login bonus, and you can make large amounts of it without ever spending money thanks to the game's surprisingly robust trading economy. So. Yeah. They get a pass. Warframe is also good on its own merits, despite being free to play. They also listen to their community about pricing. Go check out Warframe. It's free. It's free!!! Warframe is my unofficial top spot.
Sorry I got a little bit distracted. So there's only really two instances where people will tolerate microtransactions and lootboxes in the contemporary sense: either a game is good enough and polished enough and the lootboxes are unobtrusive enough that you can just sort of shrug your shoulders and say "it sucks but what are you gonna do" or it genuinely relies on those microtransactions to support itself. When these tenets are violated, people WILL get mad. People raised absolute hell about Battlefront 2's scummy monetization schemes, enough to get EA to back off. Fallout 76 is getting lambasted in no small part due to its utterly overpriced "cosmetic" shop where you pay ten real dollars to get your power armor to look blue. You can buy fullfeatured, critically acclaimed games for half that price and you already dumped $60 on this lemon of a game. Destiny 2 got into hot water for being cagey about how its exp values were calculated and how the previously free and user-friendly shaders became one-time use items you could only get from rolling the dice. The public is getting positively irate about all of this nonsense, and if Fallout 76 (and evidently battlefield V?) is any indication, we are fast approaching a breaking point where shareholder demand for profit will outpace the consumer's ability to provide it and the developer's ability to skinner box it out of us.
Of course Nintendo continues to march on to the beat of its own drum seemingly unaffected by all of this garbage. Not out of any moral superiority, I imagine. More likely it's just a consequence of that company still being in the process of being dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century. Maybe a few years down the line when everyboy else has abandoned microtransactions Nintendo will pick them up, put a cute Mario motif on it, and we'll be back to square one. Time will tell. We're in a volatile time for games and the timebomb keeps ticking. I just hope the explosion isn't too messy. I guess.
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