#but we can't have nice things anymore
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I haven't edited this at all yet, since I don't have any photo software on New Computer yet, but hey! I have a new computer! For the first time in, uh, four years? I can see things at a size and resolution and color and detail level that isn't "smartphone," and it makes me fall in love with photos like this one, that are small and filled with teeny details like the way the rain is running down the pane, or how the leaves of the vine outside cling to the glass. Anyway it's my desktop background now, because it's the season for hot summer rains. More things to come now that I can see them properly, thank fuck.
#and also once I can find a good alternative to photoshop#because fuck adobe#or Lightroom really#that's the one that will be much harder to replace#because goddam the ease of batch editing in Lightroom is so nice#but we can't have nice things anymore#35mm#35mm film#wyrd mysteries#minox#fuji 400
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Fic : Gone and Back Again, Chapter 8
Commission for the sweetest Minnie,, ty for letting me illustrate more scenes from this fic, I love this story so much.
#Fic:gaba#trainer green#namelessshipping#reguri#this scene is not reguri but the fic is extremely#sneak peek of ch 8#srry glaze ate this up blame the art thieves we can't have nice things anymore
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Fuck the people that pirated For the Future, fuck the people that are spreading it, fuck The Owl Club for uploading it and saying they didn’t owe Dana anything, and fuck anyone who doesn’t have enough decency to be patient and respectful to Dana and the TOH crew for giving us this show in the first place and fucking wait
#the owl house#the owl house leaks#i am so fucking pissed right now#legit thinking about staying off all social media until for the future airs bc avoiding spoilers is gonna be a nightmare#this is why we can't have nice things anymore fr#the star child speaks
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being a COD artist is not for the weak, every time i want to look for HEALED scars or gunshot wound references google just shows me pictures of literal corpses that have been stabbed or shot
WHY
#this is why i can't search for references anymore#this is why we can't have nice things#call of duty#cod#art#call of duty fanart#cod fanart#cw death#cw violence#cw corpse mention#cw graphic
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been listening to the line on repeat this whole damn day and idk whether to ascend cuz the glorious vocals or kms
#HHHHHNNNNNNNGGGGGG WHAT IF I DIED#“stay your pretty eyes on course” PLEASE I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE#this is why we can't have nice things#ASKJLDGHJFGWERIGAJFSHGSKDFH#is this how xie lian feels when he says idk whether to laugh or to cry#arcane#the line#jayvik#doomed yaoi
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#i'm done i'm so fucking tired#i want to burn the internet to the ground#i want to destroy my computer chuck my phone into a river and go live in the middle of nowhere#no wifi no 4g no nothing#i want to die because we cannot fucking escape this shit#meta using my art to train ai and refusing my request to stop#my computer not being able to run glaze or nightshade or any of those ai poisoning thingies#spam emails and text messages and whatsapp messages and bots in the comments#and just EVERYTHING TRYING TO SELL ME THINGS WHILE ALSO STEALING WHAT'S ALREADY MINE#i hate it i hate it i can't fucking stand it anymore#and you'll be like ''then why don't you go offline then... nobody's making you have an instagram account''#and you'd be right... if it weren't for the fact that i chose the one fucking career that DEMANDS online presence#i already struggle to find work as an illustrator WITH social media and POSTING MY ART ONLINE#how the fuck would I do it if people don't see my art?!#and sure people have illustrated books way before the internet existed... sure... BUT IT DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT ANYMORE#i'm so fucking angry and tired and frustrated that there's no way out of this#the internet is becoming unusable yet life demands it#my only option right now it to fuck myself and my beliefs and let companies steal my hardwork for the benefit of..?#having no notes in my posts except for the bots commenting ''see 👀my hole 🍑 daddy 💦 kitten 😻 ready 4 u 🤤 subscribe🔥 pay 💲 me''#i'm sick of this#i don't want to delete everything i ever posted online because A. at this point that's useless and B. again. how the fuck would i get work?#also even then... emailing my clients their finished illustrations goes through google drive or gmail...#do we think google is nice and doesn't steal images to train generative AI?#''talk to your representatives they need to make laws about this'' my fucking president is currently chumming it up with elon fucking musk#while people here are starving to death#we're literally going to freeze this winter because the genius goverment has fucked up our gas supply and that's used not only for heating#but for ELECTRICITY PRODUCTION#so we won't have a wat to heat our houses cook or even fucking SEE AT NIGHT#and you want me to ask them to make copyright laws?!#i want to die
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Soulmates AU in which the red string of fate shows up when a life altering moment takes place between you and your soulmate. Like, Eren killing two grown man to save/help Mikasa kind of important. A moment that changes at least one of them.
And, you know, because this is about JeanMarco as always - these two dorks filling their gas, Marco telling him why he's a good leader and stuff and Jean watching him, shocked about what he's saying... Then he takes notice of the red string tying him to Marco and his eyes widen even more in shock, like it both made no sense and all the sense in the world. Marco doesn't even notice until he's done talking and sees Jean's reaction and his reaction is something similar to 'Oh', both because Jean was his soulmate and because that moment meant something important to Jean. And they're both so awkward, not knowing how to process this.
#And you know the angsty part in which they just keep going without addressing any of this just for Marco to fucking die#Anyway#We deserve more JeanMarco soulmate aus man give me more more more#Jean would 100% avoid to the situation because he has no clue what to do the coward. Keep in mind this guy's been crushing on Mikasa all#this time and Marco's his //best friend//. It would be awkward#Then you know Marco saves Jean from that titan and he does warm up a little at the concept. Suddenly having Marco as his soulmate doesn't#sound so bad anymore. Well TOO LATE BUDDY HE'S DEAD NOW#why can't we have nice things#aot#snk#aot jean#aot marco#jeanmarco#Aot jeanmarco#Snk jeanmarco#snk jean#snk marco#jean kirstein#jean kirschstein#marco bodt#marco bott#soulmate au#Just kiss him you fool
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youtube
Deep Night The Series Party
#bear with the singing there comes the acrobatics and dance parts after#deep night the series#aerial acrobatics#flying pole#pole dance#unfortunately yt is a bitch with the music 😭#guess we can't have nice things anymore these days
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Can't wait to quit my job so I can write and VO and cook and workout and be a normal person full time
#i'm giving it until august#you know how nice it will be to not have the stress anymore?#DID YOU KNOW MY SUPERVISOR SAID IF HE WAS IN MY POSITION HE WOULD HAVE QUIT BY NOW#TOTALLY NORMAL RESPONSE#YOU KNOW WHAT LET THEM TRY TO RAISE $300K ON THEIR OWN LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS#oh another volunteer today told them I couldn't quit??? bc i'm one of the only reasons they still volunteer???#sounds like we have issues with volunteer and donor retention - the things I've said for the last 4 years#interesting#I'm always right and no one listens to me???#rant tags#man I am not doing well#toasty posty#working for a nonprofit is great (until you are unintentionally exploited bc you can't say no!)
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I was waiting for Alex to get points and shut the haters up 😔
#we can't have nice things anymore#alex i Need you to shut them up please#alex albon#williams racing#f1#formula 1
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sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg
#i was justttttt thinking that aw it's so sad that navratri music is playling everywhere and i don't have friends to go with#like last year atleast i had tuition sorta friends but now ive isolated them too it sucks#but i was like well it's okay ill do it when i grow up celebrate every festival i didn't get to in my house because we just never do#and then she calls and she's like let's go this club jahan every year famous hota hai full celebration#and i was like ehh i don't want to i don't even know how to play and ill have to convince dad for raat can't we just#go to a cafe or something dopahar mein uske liye i don't even need permission#and she even agreed but she sounded sad and disappointed about it so i was like well fuck it you want to go club na#and she was like yeahhh so i was like aagh okay and i asked and we're going tomorrow!!!!!#and it's so ridiculous like i just say i don't want to go but it's actually so exciting to go someplace other than a cafe!!!!#and i was complaining to her ki okay ill go but i won't dress up and five mins later me and mumma are making full outfit with dupatta#style decided jewellery she has saved for years that are specifically navratri types and she's like we'll get my blouse altered it's fine#you know being sick has really given me perspective on my parents#im not going to hate my mom anymore i never used to growing up i always thought she was brave but helpless#but a stupid day in 12th i realised when we were talking that technically she COULF get divorced she just#doesn't want to because she'll be alone and she thinks we're growing up and leaving anyway so why should she let go of financial#stability for us. which is wild to me because girl you can't buy anything you want without his permission so i don't understand what's the#point if he's rich or poor but whatever whatever she's been raised this way etc etc#but anyway being sick really made me realise who the real monster is😭 all dad did was shout horribly at me all the time#and was like don't you dare take meds they're fake this is all just junk food stop eating it and you'll be fine. when i was literally#having 103 FEVER.#and mom was the one who was making me different drinks juices cutting up fruits staying with me as i get my blood drawn#checking my fever sote jaagte#like wow i literally wouldn't have gotten better if it wasn't for her and i couldn't believe how attentive and nice she was being#like yes i understand she just thinks this is her duty she's just playing her role a mother a housewife but still#idk i just realized that okay atleast she's good at being a mother dad isn't even that why am i feeling good about him when his love#not even love his politeness is so fucking conditional#and mom healed me even tho i told her about clubbing and drinking lots of alcohol she's kinda against it because she's seen#horrible things in life family yucky men but still she understands ans trusts my sister mostly and know we just do it for fun and she#wasn't even mad!!!!!!! like wow ooay#moms love is actually not conditional for the first time in my life i felt like if i fall maybe she could be there to catch me and dad wld
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Hanging out with the bestie is scream laughing about funny/cringy shit we did when we were in middle school, then immediately after talking about why we feel unlovable lmao
#not snz#the duality of man fr lmaooooo#my stomach literally hurts from laughing so much#and then we goddamn were like 'anyway there's something wrong with me on the romance department'#amazing ahdkakslal#no bc I'm fucking weird like#whenever i like someone it's just kinda for fun#like it's not serious and i don't want it to go anywhere i just like having a little crush i guess#idk how to explain it but it seems nice in my head i just don't wanna fr date them?? but it's nice to imagine???#but the second i find out they like me it's over and done and i don't like them anymore#like no absolutely not it can't be real#i literally have no idea why I'm like this#it's fr just a celebrity crush but with my friends#i don't get it#like yeah i absolutely should like them in theory and want to date them#like i know anyone else in my position would be so happy their crush liked them back#but for me i hate it like it ruins the whole thing bc i don't actuslly wanna date them?????#genuinely no clue what's wrong with me that makes me panic and frantically try to press the backspace button when my crush likes me back#but that's why i don't have a partner LMAO#idk maybe my person feels safe bc it's technically not a real relationship and therefore it's safe#whatever I'm too tired to deal with this but just know there's something so fucking wrong with me#also i know i was literally just talking about this like a day ago but I'm still think about it#like fr what is wrong with me someone tell me what flavor of fucked up i am that I'm like this lmao
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curtainup musical theatre karaoke is just GONE from youtube and i am crying
#WHYYYY CAN'T WE HAVE NICE THINGS ANYMORE UGH#musical theatre#NOW how will i sing the party goes with you?? <//3#i feel attacked#musical theater#musical theatre kid#musicals#vocalist#youtube
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you guys know a lot of info abt me from my random rants but here's a good one: did you guys know i'm scared of balloons
#when kids have them and they're playing with them and squishing them i die a little#i'm very afraid of loud noises in general. balloons fireworks thunder etc etc 😭😭#the good thing! ever since leaving high-school i've never been around balloons anymore (for parties and events)#and where i live now people don't blow fireworks#and i have never seen a thunderstorm here either. it's always light rain or fog#so that's nice i am normal now 😭😆😆#i hadn't even thought about it in a while#i just remembered because someone on tiktok said they had globophobia and the comments were making fun of her. it's nawt funny it's#embarrassing 😔😔😔 we can't help it
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why are they laughing at him as he gets straight up killed??? he doesn't deserve this! he's a sweet kid at heart! he literally just needs one (1) real friend!!
#jack facts#willow and xander and tara all got that exact type of chance and you could argue the same is true for cordelia and anya!#and why don't we just not even start in on angel#like jonathan went from attempted suicide to so grateful for one moment of attention he created a whole award to give about it#to IN ONE YEAR becoming so powerful a witch he seamlessly altered the perception of the entire population of the world#without any adverse effects to himself and only the one (1) flaw that is inherent to the spell he used#to all but instantly giving up that power when he realized it posed danger (that he understood) to people#to feeling genuine remorse for doing that even tho he needed it explained to him why they were so upset#and making every apparent effort to learn that with humility and offer whatever wisdom he could in return#to... this.#like why tf didn't anybody say hey man are you doing alright after being suicidal?#hey man the spell you did was wrong but that doesn't mean you can't do magic anymore why don't we meet up sometimes and study together#or better yet he could have mcfuckin joined the coven god damn#like they went from witch being a relatively gender neutral combo of innate talent and learned skill in early seasons#to now we're supposed to forget the boy willow and amy did spells with in hs + the fact that giles himself was in an all male coven#and even believe that only Special Girls like willow and tara can do any significant amount of real magic at all#why on earth is willow the biggest witch of ever and started out floating pencils and then having a whole plotline#about learning to use her power ethically and control herself and practice temperance and etc#AND anya gets to be a good guy even though she has to be taught about ethics and consent and compassion and all that too#but jonathan's thing is being soul crushingly lonely and having no self esteem but being incredibly sweet once given the time of day#and is instead relegated to two bit loser villain?#why because he's the Actually Uncool type of unpopular instead of the Too Smart And Nice To Be Popular type of unpopular?#makes me sick he literally just needs a friend. just one genuine friend who cares about him personally. that's all.#and it's not like they're doing a ''this is what happens to vulnerable kids when no one cares about them!'' thing which would be different#no they're just like lol he's unpopular like our protags but he's also short with a nasally voice! which means he's bad!#once again i swearrrrr i'm not doing armchair psych on a creator based on the content of their work#please i swearrrrrrrrrrrr i'm not doing that i prommy i know it doesn't work that wayyy i knowwwww#don't worry about ittt i'm so totally definitely not doing that at allllll#anyway
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😒
#most of my uni professors are great but screw this shit course#got a C ugh sucks sm#on this useless course#but that's really more on her than anything that i only got this grade#the thing is apparently her expectations were so high?? but we never got any clear instructions on our asignments?#i litterally don't what tf i got a C for what I did wrong because she never criticized ANY of my work#everything was always good until it's not anymore i guess 🙃#she was such a nice professor only to grade so harshly wow sometimes it can really fool you 🫠#or maybe she didn't grade it but the professor who was supposed to hold this course wow this would be even worse tbh#a professor who was never there grading our work#but the tasks were always so vague it was awful#and the other thing is she never responded to emails so we couldn't ask her things#nah i hate this she should have given better instructions and if there is room for improvement please say so and not only when grading 🙃🙃#but everything was always great#i can't afford another grade like this this semester ugh#one thing is for sure i will never again take any of her courses#the miscommunication to allow me to get a better grade and friendlyness only to then grade like this was enough#i really couldn't believe my eyes when i got the result 🙃😭
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