#but ultimately I decided the one we got was much more interesting

[shkika]

Do you think moon was more like pebbles when she was first made? I remember sig talked about how most iterators were in a similar emo phase early in their life.

Oh yes absolutely I think it's adorable if Moon saw a little bit of her loong gone days in him. The grumpy syndrome is genetic.

Though I do think she was a slightly different flavor than Pebbles! I swear I've mentioned this before, but I think she was the type to be working all the time and be keen on not wasting any time for meaningless things. She wanted to be proper and responsible. Very focused on her task and all like a self- respecting iterator should.

Time did soften this big ol' pebble though and her experiences with her colony and fellow iterators changed her a lot to the kind, wise and patient Moonie we know and love now.

[gravegoer]

MORE SEVIKA X SIREN I BEG

I hear your call [P2] ⋅˚₊‧ ଳ

HALF OF MY INBOX IS SIREN READER !! dw, i got you guys. ( also i got a lot of love in my inbox. !! thank you so much for the support. youre so sweet , im looking at �� anon ily ) summary: sevika saves your scales.

masterlist , part 1 2.1k words part 3

The night after you met Sevika, you followed her ship, even throughout the darkness. The celebratory crew could be heard on the deck, along with the clanking of glasses and music.

Although this wasn't what you were interested in, you were interested in a certain captain. You assumed she didn't bother with the celebration and got bored swimming alongside the ship.

Eventually, it had come to a stop in the late night, now sitting in the dock of a well-populated island. You eyed the people that stepped off, and your gaze landed on Sevika.

She was hard to miss, her large stature and intricate outfit stood out amongst the crew, ultimately declaring herself captain. There was a sort of swagger in her walk, perhaps from booze or maybe exaustion.

Whatever the case, you were interested.

You couldn't get too close to land, deciding to lurk around the harbor instead. You ducked under the water upon hearing any movement or voices. Being this close to population was no place for a siren, especially such as yourself.

Any fisherman or pirate alike would take take you up and pawn you for a pretty price. So you heeded in your movements. Luckily, you were a skilled enough swimmer that you made little to no sound whilst in the water, barely leaving behind a ripple.

The sun was just now rising, and you assumed Sevika would be looking for a place to stay the night. There was no way you could wait around that long for her to come back. But that doesn't mean you didn't want to.

To your delight, a group of men swarmed to talk on a dock near you, and their conversation was full of exactly what you wanted to hear.

Sevika.

They were pirates looking for a crew, and from the looks of them, quite experienced pirates.

"She's headed to Shank's motel. Shall we give her a visit?"

"This late at night, man. You've got to be spewin' some blige. She'd flog you just at sight."

"Aye. Migh' as well wait till' morn' "

You grew closer to their spot, itching to hear more. Your head nearly bumped against the old wood due to your closeness.

Suddenly, a hand was in your hair, but unlike Sevika's, it was clammy and gross.

You screeched at the intrusion, being pulled out of the water.

A fourth man.

How could you let your guard down so easily?

"Now, what's a stupid lass like you doin' so far out at bay."

You crained your head up to be met with a severely shredded bald man. You clawed at the hand on your scalp and thrashed. The sting threatened to bring tears to your eyes, and you opened your mouth for a song.

The knowing man slammed your face down onto the wood, stopping you in your tracks.

"Fuck. This one be a siren, but the harder the catch, the more the prize is what I say."

Another voice came from your left.

"Knock 'er out, and I'll grab a net."

A blunt thwack was heard before your vision went dark.

..

Sevika had tied her boat to a post before leaving her crew to find a place to eat, preferably not a bar where she knew the rest of her men were headed. Having enough to drink, she sat at a stand selling calaloo and threw a few dabloons on the counter silently, waiting for her meal.

Her mind wasn't on anything except for you. The ruler of the Seven Seas was enamored with a mer-person.

How fitting.

She thought about the way your eyes sparkled when she told you stories, looking at her like no other. How your cold hands were so gentle when you touched her. Your soft lips against hers.

I mean, how much deeper could she fall.

Having been so engrossed in thought, she barely noticed the whispers around her. Barely. She, of course, was the talk of the town.

She intimidated people just by taking a seat next to them, so casual yet making everyone at the stand turn to glance at her. It wasn't often that Sevika bothered with mundane tasks such as eating anywhere but a bar, and nobody really saw her face anywhere except for wanted posters.

Although it was a picaroon town, and there was no way anyone there would bother to turn her in or snitch, she still pushed her plate away and got up to fend off the prying eyes. (Picaroon means pirate)

Her buckled boots thudded against the dirt road, now on the way to the nearest inn. She was almost desperate for a nights sleep without rocking on the mad waters.

Upon entering, a large man stomped past her, eager to get somewhere, she was just about to grab him and slam him into the nearest counter before her attention was interrupted.

"Them chowder-headed fools caught themselves a real jem, aye?"

"Heard theys' puttin' 'er up for auction"

That was never a pretty thing to hear. It either meant low-life pirates snagged themselves an expensive treasure, or worse, a living treasure. But it wasn't rare that a fisher or pirate just so happened to find a large, human-like fish in their net and put her on the market, so Sevika paid it no mind.

She did linger on the fact that it might be the one person on her mind at the moment but quickly shook away those thoughts. You were smart, quick. Theres no way any man would have you that easily.

When she approached the counter for a key, the shop-keep laughed, "What? You want a room? I think you ought to pay the stands a visit, its the first auction in a week."

She scoffed and rolled her eyes at his words, her head dipping into her previous thoughts again.

I guess it wouldn't hurt to make sure.

So she drug her tired and heavy legs right back across town for the sliver of a chance that it might be you.

..

You awoke with a harsh throbbing in your head, feeling cold and dried up. Through blurry vision, you could make out the steel bars, closing you in. And a loud voice,

"Another bid for 300 dabloons !"

Fuck. It's what you've been dreading all your life. You got caught due to your lack of awareness and clumsiness. Inwardly cursing at yourself, you grabbed at the bars and shook violently.

"Look, she's awake. How do we feel about upping the price now that we can see her pretty eyes."

The man stuck his fingers in your enclosure and tilted your chin up. At that moment, you became aware of the metallic muzzle on your face, keeping your jaw in place. You glared up at him, knowing you'd bite him if you could.

He pulled away when you jerked your head forward, as if making the motion to bite him. He laughed loudly, and another bid came from the crowd.

"500!"

The men yelled and whooped at that. You thunked your head against the bars, the loudness ringing in your ears. You can't believe you got yourself in this mess for a pirate.

It was just hollering and laughing for a while before the man beside you spoke,

"500, Aye? Going once.. going twice.."

"A thousand."

A heavy female voice stood out amongst the rest, sounding angry and tired. Your eyes darted around, looking for the source of the voice, but another shrill voice spoke up.

"1000? Is this woman kidding? 1500."

The men's laughs roared in again, smacking the mans back and slinging booze. A tall figure stepped out of the shadow, cigarillo in hand, and spoke, "Double it."

All went quiet as they eyed Sevika, her arm crossed over her chest as she brought a mechanical hand to her lips to take a drag. She blew the smoke from the side of her mouth, making a taller male cough.

Your eyes widened, and fingers gripped the bars steadier. When you made eyecontact, you could have sworn her eyes went soft for a moment before she looked to your captor.

"Well.. any final bids..?"

He spoke seemingly frightened and pleased with himself all in one moment.

Nobody spoke against Sevika, as a captian never had a bounty over their head for a reason. And her bounty was hefty.

There were no protests as she pushed her way through the crowd, seemingly more violent than usual. She put her cigar out on someone's forehead, the small tiss, standing out against silence.

Her boots clunked as she ascended the stairs and plopped three brown bags atop your cage. You looked up at her, but she wasn't looking back. Her metal hand was grabbing the key from the mans hand and pushing him backward in one motion.

He stumbled, but you looked away to eye Sevikas human hand swiftly unlocking the cage. She held her hand out to you, dark hair shadowed her eyes, and hid her expression from you.

She was who you were here for.

You hesitantly grabbed her calloused hand, and immediately, she lifted you into her arms. Now, looking into the crowd, her menacing expression was highlighted by the dim torches that surround the stands. Her cape was draped over your tail and bare torso, shielding you from the cold, and more importantly the people.

As she was stepping down the stairs, she saw your muzzled mouth, and her expression got a tinge darker. No words needed to be spoken as she balanced you with her human arm and knee, tearing the straps of the muzzle off with a sharp finger.

It was almost instinct to hum a siren song, but before your vocal chords could start, you saw her expression and buried your face in her sturdy torso. It was the look of warning, a warning that you obeyed.

Pirates gawked at the sight of her carrying you past the crowd of people. Nobody dared to reach out and touch you. Some people didn't even dare to look at you. You kept your gaze on Sevika's clenched jaw and torn expression. The angles of her face were more prominent at this angle, you would blush at the sight but your nervousness didn't allow it.

Her grip on your tail was firm, yet gentle, human arm cradling your torso without complaining about the coldness. You weren't one to be drawn to the warmth of a human, but found yourself pressed closer against her body. You now shut your eyes to rid of the feeling of stares and judgement.

As she carried you down the dirt road back to the inn, she spoke in a frustrated tone, "You are the stupidest fish ive ever met."

"And you're the sappiest pirate ive ever met."

..

When Sevika stepped into the inn with you in her arms the keep gawked at you. You were cradled like a baby, weightless in her hold. She kept a stern gaze as he passed her the keys with a room number attached "56".

The people that sat in the inn waiting room averted their eyes, shrinking under Sevika's cold grey eyes. Her eyebrows were furrowed, making you want to reach up and rub the wrinkle between them.

She walked up old rickety stairs, almost bending under your combined weight and turned left down the hall to the room. It was surprisingly quiet, and you were able to hear the woman's ragged breaths. Sevika was obviously worn out and tired from her day, and still came to your rescue.

How heroic.

She effortlessly shifted you to one arm, making sure your head was steady against her shoulder and creaked open the wooden door. Your tail barely brushed against the ground, her height compensating for the length.

"I need—," you spoke, before she cut you off with a grunt.

"Water. I know."

Opening the door to the bathroom, she sighed at the size. It was almost too small to fit her large frame and your long tail.

Dropping you into the tub gently, she turned the knob for cold water. "Want me to sprinkle in salt?"

You genuinely couldn't tell if she was joking, "No, no it's okay," You laughed, humming at the feeling of water on your tail.

"Why did you let yourself get caught," Sevika said, more as a statement than a question.

"I wanted to find you.. and I succeeded.. mission accomplished?"

She shook her head and bent down to accommodate for the space between you. She put a warm hand to your cheek, eyes soft and almost concerned, "Don't go looking for me like that again, danger follows me closely."

You giggled at her seriousness, despite being roughed around and almost being sold as fish food (or worse) you felt somewhat at ease. The woman at your side brought you a strange feeling of comfort, comfort that the sea never brought you.

"I guess ill just have to follow you closer."

i already have ideas for part three.... hehehehehe

again, thank you for the asks they are sweet ! and comment if you want to be on the taglist for part 3 , i do have some other works in my drafts but im saving them for when i finish this series :) but asks are open !!!

@misswynters @haruko--bby @thesecondhandwoman @theirlaliengirl

[doppel-doodles]

That illustration is making me want to slam my head against solid concrete, Art block said no, and I know when to pick my battles so fuck it we ball-

A normal post about Matthew Hallard from Poppy Playtime

I briefly mentioned this in the Jack post, the fact that I didn't think I had anything new or particularly interesting to say on Matthew as I always thought the Fandom had a lot of the bases covered.

But the more I actually thought about him, the more I wanted to talk about one thing in particular:

Let's talk about Doeys tape.

In game we find a vhs tape recorded by Doey, talking about how he almost ditched everyone in favor of running away, ultimately deciding to go back for them instead. It reveals a lot about how he truly feels about the responsibility that has been given to him.

I think it was so important to include this and the reason why is quite simple:

It humanises Matthew for me.

Why I point him out specifically is due to reasons I mentioned in my other analysis, Jack's control is mostly passive, Kevin only really comes to the forefront when he feels like there is a threat to assess or deal with and it has been confirmed that Matthew is the oldest of the children as well as having been a leader of sorts since he was still a human child, so in the tape it's basically him venting.

Which is great as it makes something crystal clear: He is not a perfect saint.

Matthew is a teenager who has been parentified from an incredibly young age, places immense pressure on himself, is suffering from more burnout than a college kid and not to mention the horror that is his current existence and life-

He doesn't WANT this responsibility, he only takes it on because nobody else will or can.

And nobody even thinks to ask him ONCE how HE is doing, no,no it's him who has to do that, he is not allowed to have breaks.

For godness sake he literally tells us in the tape that he is recording it because he feels like he can't talk to anyone about his problems!

The toys- The children having someone like Doey or more accurately Matthew is not a guarantee, it is a privilege but it's a privilege Matthew needs to!

And you rarely ever see kind characters COMPLAIN about having to be kind all the time, truly looking after everyone else drains you, it's exhausting to fulfill the needs of others, more often than not you'll have to put aside your own and when you really pull the shit end of the stick you get more complains then appreciation for your troubles.

It is such a CHORE and I think a character struggling with being so selfless actually can have such a massive impact instead of just being able to handle everything, it's that tiny bit of realism I love.

Despite how exhausted and miserable Matthew was over being stuck in this position in the end he turned back. Because he loves his friends that much, and he should get massive props for that.

And to think he still did so much but didn't think anything he did was good enough is just painful, like no honey you are enough, more than enough-

Also Poppy having once been the leader makes you think that maybe Matthew might have been hurt the most by her disappearing.

Like her leading was the closest thing to a break he ever got- and then she just up and disappears?? And it's all up to him now? Not to mention the concern? The worry??

Boy it speaks volumes that he doesn't seem to display more hostility towards her considering Poppy doesn't even EXPLAIN herself on why she left or why she couldn't come back.

He is even civil in discussing the fact that she demands for them to be okay with being blown up(also correct me if I'm wrong but didn't Poppy also include in her plan that SHE will get to live? If I heard that I would be flabbergasted.) But that's something I should discuss in another post.

For now that is everything I have about my boy, if you want to see what I have to say about other characters here is Kevin annnnnnd Jack, plus some extra stuff on Doey

[leviathanxprincess]

Introducing The Kings to Your Plushies

me and my bestie have a joke about my faves showing up to my place for sex and i would not realize and just start talking about my plushies based on this dumb post we saw once, thought it'd be funny to turn into an actual scenario lol might do this for the other devils, angels, minhyeok if the ppl are interested lol notes: mildly sexual - not really anything deeply insane, gender neutral reader !!!

Satan

On one hand, he thinks you're really cute. On the other hand, he's here to fuck so.

He's going back and forth so much in his head for a moment he's not even paying attention to you talking oops.

Gets so frustrated and angered from trying to decide what to do it ultimately ends with him just jumping on you.

Cut you off mid word with an incredibly heat filled kiss from rage.

Honestly you might not even 100% be certain what happened but you're not complaining!! You can always talk about the rest of your plushies later!!!

Well. If Satan doesn't fuck you until the point you're resting for the next couple days.

Once he actually pays attention to you talking about them he'll remember some names here and there, but he will get them wrong on purpose to try and see you angry lol.

Mammon

The reality is he probably got you most of these plushies.

He adores seeing how you cherish them and the lore you've decided for them!!

Will remember every single detail you tell him about them!!

He thinks it's super cute and will humor you for the moment.

However, Mammon will get what he wants eventually. But for right now you're so adorable how could he tell you no?

He is DEFINITELY teasing you later once he does get to sleep with you about how cute you are.

This man lives to see you embarrassed and shy from his compliments.

Is probably buying you even MORE plushies now, hope you're prepared for that!

Leviathan

I think it depends at the point in your relationship, if it's early on he might just toss the plushies aside and get to the point of what he wants.

Later on I do think he genuinely listens, even if he's impatient and pretends like he doesn't care. If it's important to you he does care, just doesn't always show it.

Especially if you use the plushies as a form of comfort due to trauma or any other issues.

You won't even realize how much he paid attention until he refers to your plushies by their names if you accidentally leave them laying around.

However he does still get jealous so so easily so maybe try not to spend too much time at once focusing on them rather than him.

He tries so hard but eventually the jealousy will overtake him and he will just get straight to the sex.

For what it's worth, he still found you cute! He just can't help himself.

Beelzebub

I'm not gonna lie, you might be able to successfully distract him for a good bit.

Dude's invested in the names and lore and anything you have created for them!!! He likes hearing about it !!!!

He isn't gonna be able to remember every single bit of these details but he might remember some of it here and there. Either way he likes listening to how you talk about them!

That being said he can only sit still for so long so maybe introduce him a little at a time lmao.

Especially because once he DOES start to get distracted he's gonna remember the original reason he was here.

And well. Yeah just like that it's time to fuck!

Because you successfully distracted him for a bit you might be in store for an extra long session this time so! Good luck!

Lucifer

He listens fully. Wants to hear everything you have to say about them.

He finds the plushies super cute, so he enjoys listening to your ramblings, even if he had certain intentions when he arrived.

But most importantly, he's so endeared, you're so absolutely adorable to him. The way your face lights up when you talk about them, he can't get enough!!!!

So he lets you have your moment.

And when you're finally done is when he's actually gonna fuck you lol. Yeah, that was still happening he had a goal.

And if he's teasing you extra specially tonight, don't even worry about it (whether it be from compliments or degradation who's to say!! just know you're gonna be crying extra hard this time he's so worked up from how cute you are!).

Of course, he remembers every single detail you tell him, he has that shit committed to memory. Asks you questions sometimes to see that adorable look on your face again!

Belphegor

Goodnight.

He tries to pay attention but he's ready to fall asleep apologies.

He showed up for sex and when it wasn't happening his brain turned off.

That being said the second you realize he's asleep and start trying to wake him up he's on you!!

Like okay conversation done we're fucking now right?

It's just easier to give what he wants and lecture him in the process.

It's fine he tries to listen later. That being said if he invites Beleth to listen too don't worry about it. He totally didn't tell him to memorize details for him because he's probably gonna fall asleep again.

Asmodeus

Sorry there's just no way to distract this man from sex.

If he's showing up for sex he's here to for sex !!!!

And he WILL get it!!!

If anything he just starts fucking you while holding up the plushies to you and asking you details about them.

Unfortunately you're kinda too fucked out by that point to truly answer them.

He's a fucking menace apologies.

And he cannot be stopped I fear.

That being said any information he does manage to get out of you he does fully remember!!

It's his own weird way of showing affection, ya know?

[goodlucktai]

9, raph and leo?

dialogue prompts

9. “I know, I know it hurts.”

x

When Raph was eight years old, the twins decided they needed their own bedrooms and, like with all other things they had ever decided, they made it everyone else’s problem. As a united front, the two of them had the capacity to wear down a squad of Navy Seals in a manner of days, let alone one overtired single father. 

The campaign for separate bedrooms turned out to be a long con. Donnie had been denied an evil science laboratory by Splinter multiple times, on the grounds of it being dangerous, and Donnie being seven, and evil being bad. But a room of his own could be whatever he wanted, and he wanted a lab. 

It took most of a week for Splinter to discover that the twins were still doubled up in the room that was ostensibly Leo’s while Donnie’s was being used for nefarious purposes, but by then Donnie had installed an electronic lock on the door that he built out of components gutted from old kitchen appliances and was fully ready to die on that hill. 

While Pops and Donnie were locked in a contest of wills that would ultimately go in Donnie’s favor (because Splinter’s achilles heel back then—and even now—was that he thought little turtles at their most sulky and unreasonable were just adorable) Raphie had looked at Leo with a confused frown on his face. 

“How come you went along with it, Lee? You didn’t even get your own room.”

Leo shrugged, bright gold eyes shining with interest as he watched his twin and his father argue back and forth. He was following it carefully, probably ready to join in if it looked like Donnie was going to lose—more engaged than he ever was playing video games or flipping through comics. 

At the time, all Leo said was, “Just wanted to see if I could.”

Raph thought it was because he was a troublemaker, and he maintained that idea up until Mikey—intuitive beyond his years, even as a sweet little six year old—said he figured it was just that Leo’s head went as crazy fast as Donnie’s did, only in ways that didn’t involve breaking and building things. 

A full decade later, Raph knows Mikey was right on the money. Looking back, he sees a kid who was wickedly smart and terribly understimulated. Leo didn’t create trouble for the heck of it, he just liked having problems to solve. He wanted conversations and tricks and puzzles, he needed hoops to jump through like dolphins did on TV, or else he’d get cranky and sneaky. 

Their world became a much simpler, more peaceful place once Leo got his first phone and discovered an online chess app with a leaderboard. 

All this to say, Leo has had a mind for strategy since before he could talk in full sentences. He’s a natural-born leader, and after the failed Krang invasion, he really stepped up and took it seriously. Raph is so proud of him he doesn’t have words big enough to contain the size and shape of it all. It isn’t as hard as he had imagined it would be to let go of the reins and give Leo the room he needs to shine. 

Some days are better than others. For the most part, Leo says jump and his brothers don’t even ask how high, they just shoot for the rafters. Their teamwork is cohesive, as solid as it was when they initially realized their ninpo, and Raph thinks he’d feel sorry for the Shredder if that guy showed his face in their town again. 

But there are also days like today, when Leo says something that Raph’s big brother meter pings as Leo being silly, stirring shit up for lack of better thing to do, and he doesn’t linger on it past that initial knee-jerk impression. 

They’re working with a group of mutants out of Hell’s Kitchen, mutants who are walking the line between vigilantism and outright crime. They’re rough around the edges, but good-natured for the most part. The turtles kept bumping into that other group as they crisscrossed around the city until finally their leader, Old Hob, said, “Why don’t we just get on the same program instead of stepping on each other’s heels?” and a tentative partnership was formed. 

It’s been a week since then, and in that time Raph and his brothers have been firmly adopted by the grown-up mutants, who ask pointed questions about what time they went to bed the night before and whether or not they had a decent breakfast and how their online classes are going. 

“This must be what having overbearing aunties is like,” Donnie said to April on the phone none-too-quietly, and Sally, feline mutant and aforementioned overbearing auntie, knocked her knuckles on his battleshell reprovingly. But that about summed it up. 

There was one spanner in the works, and that was Liam.  

——

“Anyone else getting bad vibes from that guy by the way?” Leo says one day. 

There’s something performative about it, his usual pomp and charisma with a plastic edge. Mikey tilts his head like a service dog who just caught the scent of a potential medical emergency. Donnie looks up from his phone, eyes keen the way they only are when he and his twin are about to communicate with the telepathy they’ll deny they have.

But Raph is having a bad pain day, and his well of patience for shenanigans is much shallower than it normally is. 

“Leon, don’t start,” he says, rubbing the slider’s head playfully to take any sting out of the dismissal. “If I have to put up with any middle child nonsense today I’m gonna scream.”

There’s a beat, his second-youngest brother visibly hesitating on a mental fork in the road. He’s gotten so good about being forthcoming but his first impulse is still to play along, deny, conceal-don’t-feel. He still has this idea in his head of what a good leader is supposed to be, and he’s still willing to whittle parts of himself away that don’t fit that mold. 

To his credit, Leo tries again. “I don’t like him,” he says with less certainty. 

“You don’t have to be best friends with the guy,” Raph replies. There’s enough warning in his tone that Leo knows to drop it. “Just get along until we go home.”

He works his shoulder, trying to do something about the solid ache it’s become, and Leo’s eyes drop to the mass of scarring there and then flit away. He starts to outline the route their patrol is going to take, reaching into his belt bag for the jar of Tiger Balm he’s taken to carrying with him and handing it over to Raph as he talks. 

Raph smiles, the warmth in his chest ballooning up to swallow the impending impatience and annoyance brought out by pain. That warmth stays with him through their whole run, even as Donnie video-calls April and deadpans “POV you’re tailing some guy who didn’t get the memo that armed robbery is cringe as hell,” even as Mikey goes out of his way to jump and tumble off a fire escape in time to give Mondo a high-five as he skates by in the opposite direction, even as Leo progressively gets quieter the closer they get to their two AM check-in at the Mutanimals�� railyard base.

Looking back, Raph can count all the red flags he missed and hates himself a little more for each one. Leo sometimes causes problems for fun, and he likes to see what trouble he can get away with or get himself out of, and he is a downright menace to society when he’s bored—but he’s good. He’s sweet, and charming, and wants to help. He wouldn’t have raised an issue with the other group of mutants, potentially cutting ties with useful allies, unless he had a decent reason to. 

And that reason, Raph discovers that night—after information has been exchanged and all that's left is to hang out at the base watching TV and playing table tennis until Splinter inevitably texts to remind his sons of their curfew—is Liam. 

He doubles back into the meeting room where he left his phone and sees the goose mutant has put himself between Leo and the only exit, head lowered on a serpentine neck, beak open to show a flash of sharp teeth in a display that Raph’s animal hindbrain reads clearly as threat. 

His grip on the doorframe causes it to crack. 

“Leo,” he says in a voice he doesn’t recognize. 

His little brother’s head jerks up, half-hopeful, half-disbelieving. Later, Raph will hate himself for putting even a sliver of doubt in Leo’s mind, for unknowingly invalidating his feelings. Leo should never be surprised that his big brother showed up for him. He should never have been left to fend for himself in a situation that made him uncomfortable, especially after he found the courage to be upfront about it. 

“C’mere,” Raph says, lifting an arm—a little turtle’s cue to tuck themselves safely against Raph’s side. 

Whatever his expression is doing, it’s caused dead silence to blanket the room like a foot of packed snow. Liam looks markedly unhappy to see Raphael standing there, but Leo runs to meet him. 

A strategist, a faceman, a leader, and barely seventeen years old. 

“We were just talking,” Liam says with a lightness that rings as false. 

“Next time I find out you and my brother were just talking, I’ll wring your skinny neck,” Raph replies, matching his tone. Liam may be twice Raph’s age, but he’s half Raph’s size, and Raph has gone head-to-head with the Krang general and the Shredder and walked it off each time. Raph is fully prepared, in this moment, to murder this fucking goose. 

Leo taps on Raph’s carapace, just as one of his violent inner voices is lifting its head in the back of his brain and considering making an appearance. On Leo’s end, a warning that someone else is coming from down the hall. On Raph’s end, a reminder that his first priority is the one he’s holding. 

He turns, keeping Leo beside him, in time to see Hob appear around the corner. The cat mutant stops dead in his tracks, slitted eyes moving from Raph, down to Leo, to the doorway beside them, and back again.  

“Problem?”

“We’re going home,” Raph says, a rumble in his voice he wouldn’t know how to temper even if he wanted to. “And we’re not coming back. Don’t call us unless someone’s dying or there’s another alien invasion.”

“Knock on wood,” Leo mumbles near-silently. 

Old Hob doesn’t answer right away. It’s impossible to tell what the older mutant is thinking on a good day, outwardly recalcitrant and unfriendly, even though he has never snapped at Mikey’s cheerful rambling or Leo’s wheedling attempts to goad him into yet another chess match or even Donnie’s accidental ninpo-related shortage of every appliance in the Mutanimals’ kitchen. He and Sally and Ray and Herman all go out of their way to make their base comfortable and accessible to the turtles and Mondo and Pete, like it really matters to them that the younger mutants have a safe place tucked away that they can fall back on. 

And Raph had appreciated that, up until now. Up until they proved it wasn’t safe, actually. Up until he’d seen a grown man leering meanly at his baby brother, just because he thought he could keep getting away with it.

When Hob does speak, all he says is, “Get home safe, boys.”

Raph shoulders around him, and collects Donnie and Mikey from the main room immediately. Mikey says, “Woah, are you guys okay?” and Donnie shoots a poisonous look behind them, like if he glares hard enough he can see back in time to what happened to put those expressions on Leo and Raph’s faces. 

“We’re peachy, Miguelito,” Leo says, disquietingly convincing. “Just had a difference of opinion with our hosts is all.” 

“Stay out of Hell’s Kitchen from now on until I say so,” Raph adds sternly. 

Raph tells dad about Liam when they get home, because there is no universe where that doesn’t happen, and Leo immediately gets hauled into Splinter’s room for what sounds like a very serious conversation. Raph, Donnie and Mikey cluster shamelessly outside the door to eavesdrop, and some frightened thing in Raph’s heart lets out the breath it’s been holding when Leo says, “Nothing happened, papa, I promise. He was just weird.”

“Let him be weird to my Baby Blue one more time and I will show him exactly why your father was the undisputed Battle Nexus champion,” Splinter says. He cups Leo’s face and rubs his thumb over a striped cheek, as if he’d like to keep his son right there where no one had the capacity to hurt him. “Thank you for telling us. I’m so proud of you. I will actually kill him if he looks at you again.”

Leonardo smiles brightly, daddy’s boy of the family and glutton for attention that he is, those leftover dregs of anxiety in his eyes finally melting away. 

“I think we should let dad kill him,” Donnie announces, eyes icy, tone flat. 

“Nah,” Mikey says, disingenuously cheerful. “Next time we run into Liam I’m setting him the fuck on fire!” 

“Language,” Raph scolds by rote, but his heart isn’t in it. 

He can’t get that scene he walked in on back at the railyard out of his head. He can’t help thinking what if something worse had happened because I didn’t listen? 

It feels like there’s a ghost in his chest, rattling his heart. He’s haunted by the what if. 

——

After dinner, Leo looks at Raph meaningfully and points at the infirmary. Doctor Leo’s orders supersede all others, 100% of the time, so Raphael sighs and surrenders his controller to Mikey’s grabby hands without bothering to make the token argument. He keeps driving Princess Peach off the track anyway. 

“Have you been stretching?” Leo says, feeling along Raph’s upper arm, where the muscles are visibly knotted. Even his careful touch hurts—that whole side of his body is tender with pain. Raph can’t help but flinch when his shoulder spasms and Leo hisses. “Shit, sorry, I know, I know it hurts. God, Raphie, you gotta say something before it gets this bad. I’m not afraid to bench you, big guy.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Raph says, amused by his little brother’s no-nonsense tone, warmed by the care Leo always takes with his family when they’re sitting in his infirmary and putting their hurts in his hands. 

There’s nothing performative about him here. It’s just Leo, stripped of every false layer. 

“Let’s try to massage it out,” Leo says, all his attention bent to the task. “Then we’ll apply heat.” 

Raph hums, watching him work. His arm radiates pain, and he has to grit his teeth as Leo goes to work on the knots and the ache flares close to unbearable and wanes to a dull throb and then flares again. 

“Hey,” Raph says before he can overthink it any more. “What would you have done if I didn’t see you and Liam?”

Leo pauses, but only for a split-second. He’s as good as cornered here, because there’s no way he’ll leave Raph when he’s in pain, and there’s nowhere to hide. Thankfully for Raph’s sanity, he doesn’t try to pretend he doesn’t know what they’re talking about, even if he takes a long moment to finally answer. 

“Would’ve made Angie make me a Portal Promise to never be alone with him,” Leo admits. Flushing slightly, he mumbles, “It’s, uh, a thing we do—we both make portals, you know, so—it just means we have to keep that promise no matter what happens or what rules we have to break, and we won’t get in trouble later as long as we’re honest.” 

Raph’s heart hurts. His little brothers are so sweet, and people exist in the world who would hurt them, and he has no idea how to reconcile that. He hates that both things could be true at the same time. 

“Tello doesn’t need to be encouraged to stay away from people, and I’m pretty sure he can read my mind? But I would’ve told him anyway,” Leo goes on. “I tell him everything. I’d try to word it so he didn’t get angry enough to do something drastic, like, cut the brake lines on Liam’s Toyota Corolla. And I’d have to make it sound like you and I were on the same page, otherwise he’d go to you about it, and you’d—uh, be annoyed that I didn’t drop it, I guess.”

Getting impaled by the Krang hurt less than this, Raph thinks. He feels sick. 

“Leo—”

“I know,” Leo says quickly, a little too loud. “I know that I don’t always take stuff seriously. It’s not your fault for thinking—you know. You didn’t do anything wrong, Raphie. I just gotta grow up.”

This kid, who—like the rest of them—has already matured well past his age, well before he should have had to. Who’s terrified of letting his family down, who has so much he thinks he needs to live up to. Any perceived failure weighs on him like the death penalty, and Raph knows he had a hand in that. 

He needs to listen. Even when he’s aching and short-tempered. Even when Leo is talking around something that scares him. Maybe especially then. 

“Can we make a deal?” Raph says, reaching up to hold Leo’s hands still under one of his own. Leo is staring hard at Raph’s plastron and doesn’t seem willing to lift his eyes for love or money, but he jerks his head in a nod. “Next time I’m not hearing you, and it’s something serious like today was serious, tell me, and I’ll stop.”

Leo’s mouth twists a bit. If it were for anyone else’s sake, he’d get in Raph’s face and make himself heard no problemo, but it’s an entirely different story when it’s his own safety in question. That part of Leo that wants to always rely on his brothers is constantly at war with the part that believes he’s not supposed to need anyone’s help anymore. 

It would be impossible for him to plant himself like a tree and refuse to be budged and demand Raph’s attention if he thought for one second that it would make Raph angry at him. 

“What if we came up with a code word?” Raph offers, squeezing Leo’s hands. “If I’m being a stubborn punk, you can tell me the code word, and I’ll listen, and I won’t get mad. Even if it turns out to be a mistake or a misunderstanding. Okay?”

He finally gets a peek of gold as Leo dares to make eye contact. He looks embarrassed, like they’ve made a huge deal out of this for no good reason, and hiding inside his shell until everyone promises to pretend like nothing happened is looking more tempting by the second. 

But he’s Leo, their fearless leader. He stared down that portal into the prison dimension without flinching. If he can do that, he can do anything. 

“What word?” he finally says. 

“You pick,” Raph tells him. 

A smile creeps onto Leo’s face, picking its way carefully across shaky ground. 

“‘Goose’,” he suggests.

"‘Goose’ it is," Raph replies firmly, committing it to memory.

He lifts his good arm and drags his little brother into a solid hug, ignoring the twinge in his back and side. Leonardo scrambles to return the embrace, shoving his face against Raph’s unscarred shoulder and clinging for all he’s worth. Which is a lot. He’s worth so much. 

Later, when Raph’s got the electric heating pad on his arm and he and Leo are watching TikTok compilations to pass the time, Mikey comes through the infirmary door at top speed, waving his phone above his head like a maniac. 

“Look what Mondo sent me!” he shouts at full volume. “I put it in the group chat!”

The video shared in the Mad Dogz chat shows Liam being kicked out of the railyard, his bags tossed into the road. Sally is going off at him at the top of her lungs, and Hob is standing by with his arms folded like he’s fully ready to let her maul the guy, and the rest of the grown-up mutants are making it pretty clear with their body language that the goose isn’t welcome anymore. 

“Dunno what they saw on the security cam, but they effin’ hated it,” Mondo says in the recording, unbothered by the absolute chaos unfolding in front of him. “Good riddance, Liam sucks. Oh, Mikester, Hob wants to know if you guys’ll be back in the Kitchen for Herman’s D&D oneshot on Saturday so he knows how much food to order. He said you should bring your dad around this time—as if we need another boring old man in the group, ugh. Anyway, let me know and I’ll pass it along, dude!”

A weight Raph hadn’t even realized he was still carrying melts off his shoulders. Leo huffs under his breath, a disbelieving little laugh. 

“Can we go, Raphie?” Mikey asks with wide eyes. “Don worked so hard on all our character sheets. He even 3D-printed custom figurines.”

“My bard is going to carry this team,” Donnie says loudly from the next room, because he’s never met a private conversation he wouldn’t shamelessly listen in on. 

It’s so important to the Mutanimals that their young friends feel safe with them, and here’s proof of that in Mikey’s hands. Raph doesn’t fully understand why they care, but he’s grateful that they do. It didn’t hit him until now how much it hurt to have the railyard taken away—and how relieved he is that they can go back, after all. 

He squeezes the arm he still has around Leo’s shoulders, prompting his brother to look up at him. 

“What do you say, Fearless?” he says warmly. “Your call.”

Raph’s listening this time. 

[greeniegirl23]

Feels Like The Very First Time (ft. Sub Alastor!)

(Minors, don't interact! Go mop the floor!! >:( P.S. I feel like we as a fandom need to experiment more with Virgin Alastor, I love this idea of slowly introducing him into sex. :3)

A year and three months. That's roughly about how long you and Alastor had been dating. It started out as a partnership before blossoming into something more. You found flowers at your personal office in the hotel for a while until Alastor finally worked up the nerve to even ask you to dinner.

Courting The Radio Demon was nice, he was tall and handsome, sure, but he was also a really good listener and tended to give sound advice despite his skills of deception. Essentially he treated you like a Queen and you practically wanted for nothing.

That is, until you decided you both were ready to elevate your relationship in a more intimate manner.

Alastor, of course opted to take the role of being dominant as long as you could take such a major transition slowly. Starting small with extra kisses on the lips, teasing touches here or there, and eventually full blown make out sessions. Alastor tried, you know he really did but ultimately always ended up ruining the mood via happy little accidents.

He tried to cradle your body only to scratch you enough to cause pain, the bad kind of pain that made him have to stop and tend to your wounds. You told him it was okay and that you could try again another time. Okay, he could do that. Cradling didn't work so he thought to try love bites. Everything was going well until the taste of your blood made his cannibal instincts kick in, resulting in him biting the shit out of you. He apologized to you for a week and a day after giving you light first aid. Fuck, alright.

Maybe if he tried to hold you with the pads of his fingers instead of his claws? It was going well, amazing even! He managed to work adorable whimpers from your lips, pinning you down on the bed while giving you proper hickies on your skin when all of a sudden you started laughing because surprise, surprise! This little darling is ticklish.

No matter how many times Alastor tried to pretend it didn't bother him but you could see through his lies as his confidence seemed to diminish. Every time you tried to encourage or initiate a moment, he had an excuse ready to throw on the table to skedaddle out of the situation as fast as possible. If you tried to talk to him about it, he would tell you he was fine and quickly change the topic to something else. It didn't help that he was slightly embarrassed for being a virgin as well, but he was too proud to ask for advice from anyone much less admit to such a thing. One day you decided you had enough of this loonicy and that you were gonna take control. A sense of determination overcame your person.

You were so going to do this!!

Starting simple with your beloved, you essentially did everything he did, without the screw ups of course. Keeping everything light, loose, and loving you eventually made it to where he was comfortable with him making out with you in bed again. Then as it got more heated, you slowly meandered your way on top of him. Breaking the kiss, he was surprised to say the least.

"..Darling?" He questioned, with one eyebrow raised and a puppy dog tilt to his head. You silenced his query with a flat response. "Do you trust me?"

He hesitated, but eventually gave you a small nod in confirmation. Giving him a quick peck on the lips you silently promised to take care of him. "If you need me to stop, just say the word."

It didn't take long for you to find his weak spots. Behind his ears, the back of his neck, the base of his tail, his chest underneath all the deer fluff.

Soon enough he was practically puddy in your hands with a fairly sized tent in his pants that you had been teasing lightly. Grinding yourself nice and slowly against him.

It was interesting really. Your big bad Radio Demon was reduced to a huffing, blushing, panting mess. Right now though, he was your Mona Lisa and he was fucking beautiful. You made sure you made him frustrated, just enough to move his hips against yours in a desperate attempt for relief.

With a swift movement of your body, you ended up on your knees in front of him, taking your time to work his pants and boxers off. You wasted no time popping the tip of his length. A bitter, salty taste of his precum bloomed on your tongue. Taking half of him into your mouth, you gave him careful licks and purposeful sucks. All though you did keep it light in order not to make him too overwhelmed.

Unsurprising to you, he didn't exactly moan, but he did groan in a unique radio-esqe way. His other sounds were the same way, being a product of his radio abilities. His internal dials flipped through stations that played fuzzy gibbering from long ago. Long ears were pinned back, and his smile was struggling to stay up with every move of your lips.

Immediately you knew when you hit the spot, when he jolted rather aggressively. Letting out a small ‘agh!’. Grabbing the sheets on the bed until the stuffing spilled out, static jibbering became straight up interference and the buzzing noises spiked in volume.

"Please!.. Darling--...--I need...!" He somehow pulled together voices from different stations to form coherent thoughts, rendering Alastor into a form of speechlessness in his own way. A rare form for him.

"Are you sure you're ready?" You asked teasingly. Pulling away from him while rubbing his tip with the soft pad of your thumb.

"Yes!!" A loud screech with a male voice echoed in the room.

Reluctantly pulling away from him, you licked your lips to savor his taste and gave him a minute to breathe as you removed your panties, before seating yourself back into his lap, trying not to moan as your sex made beautiful friction with his.

Alastor could feel the small river of slickness that was slowly covering his length. You were teasing him like the sly girl you were and just as he was about to protest, a rather pleasant warmth slowly wrapping around him. “Damn woman…” he thought. Clenching his teeth together as you sunk down on him further and further, until your hips were flush with one another.

You'd be lying if you said the way he seized and twitched didn't bring a puff of pride to your chest. The way he closed his eyes and sighed, the few whimpers that he did let out made you clench around him. The selfish thought of shattering his pelvis with your hips until you milked him for all he was worth crossed your mind, but you shook it away because of your promise. Perhaps another day you could do that. Your eyelids fluttered as the top of his length nestled snugly against your cervix, moaning at the sensation. Fuck you had been waiting for this..More lengthy than girthy, he fit damn their perfectly inside your walls.

You rolled your hips to test his reaction, he seemed perfectly fine, egar if you will.

Taking that as a green light to keep going, you started at a slow pace that didn't require too much work from either of you. You could hear the soft clicks from where you were intertwined, blushing from such lewd sounds but being happy that you but finally, finally getting the release of pent up emotions you had for Alastor after so long. You didn't mind all the other things he did for you to make you feel loved, but this was different. This was trust and vulnerability in its purest form, you felt flattered that he'd let you put him in such a position, much less have complete control over said situation.

It didn't take long for you to speed up, riding him in the most passionate way you could. Peppering his face with kisses, his neck with hickeys, and using your hand to explore his broad shoulders and lean built torso.

Alastor wasn't slacking off either, it was adorable to see him try to mimic what you were doing. Being mindful of his claws, he placed his hands on your hips and started to experimentally thrust upwards, receiving beautiful moans from you in return from the pressure. He felt alive and alert, everything was on fire in the best way possible. Pleasure burned in his stomach as he knew what was coming but he didn't want it to end so soon. You both had just gotten started!

He twitched aggressively inside you. It was obvious he was trying to hold himself back from cumming so soon but you weren't going to let that happen. Wrapping your arms around his neck and leaning against his body for more leverage, you started bouncing off of his lap at a hard pace. His radio static spiked to a very high pitch and you could have sworn you heard him shout your name. His hands gripped your sides and left deep scratches in their wake but you didn't care, you were going to make him bust a nut if it was the last thing you did, you had enough of this constant holding back nonsense.

You moaned in his ear. The change in position allowed his skin to run against your clit in a satisfactory way, bringing you closer and closer to your high as well. Skin slapped against skin and you knew he was so close by the way he started to desperately move on his own, thrusting while still letting off a thick buzz of radio interference. Suddenly a sharp microphone screech omitted from Alastor's person, his body tensed entirely as he shot rope after rope of his cum directly to the deepest part of you. Throwing his head back and squeezing his eyes shut, almost as if what he was feeling was too much for him.

It felt good to have that warm and filling feeling inside you. It felt good to watch your lover fall apart at the seams when he was usually so composed. You'd never forget the sight of his face, the smell of his sweat, or the beautiful sounds he made while you slowly brought him down from cloud 9.

Despite the fact that he came quick you were more happy that you made him cum at all. Crimson talons grew lax around your waist while the results from your bold attitude proceeded to form a white ring around the base of Alastor's pelvis. Lazily he rolled his hips into yours, just to get those last few sparks of absolute pleasure before the feeling died out completely.

After he remembered where he was and what year he was in, Alastor’s jaw hung open for a moment as he swallowed thickly. Slowly, he held his head up and with a few deep breaths he spoke using his mouth again. “You didn't..I..couldn't..--”

“Shhh, it's okay.” You cooed. “It was your first time. I'm not mad.” Alastor slowly shook his head, still huffing and puffing. His voice didn't hold his usual Transatlantic accent at the moment, instead you were blessed with hearing a rare but old Southern drawl. “That isn't fair to you.”

“I say it is. I had fun making you feel good, I know how your mistakes were making you feel somewhat insecure…”

Crimson eyes turned away from your own as a faint red dusted his cheeks. There was no use in trying to convince you into letting him help you, the look in your eye told him you had already made up your mind and that he was the priority when it should have been the reverse.

He should have been the one holding you, caressing every inch of you without messing up. Kissing you in the most intimate places until you came undone by his hands and calling his name to the high heavens.

Alastor's thoughts were cut short when you pressed the back of his head into your bosom. Gently scratching behind his ears and kissing his forehead with a giggle. “Stop thinking and cuddle me..”

His ears twitched from the contact. Wanting to object to the demand, he decided it was pointless and instead leaned back into the pillows at the head of his king sized mattress. Exhaustion overtook your body as you began to get sleepy, nuzzling against Alastor's warmth you mumbled. “I love you Alastor..”

“I adore you as well darling,” He paused. “Wouldn't you prefer it if I removed myself from you.”

“Nuh uh.” You hummed. “It's just fine where it is..”

[rewatching-sam-and-dean]

I normally try not to weigh in too much on the actors themselves, but fandom is being hysterical (not in the funny way) as usual after The Boys promo video with J2 and Misha.

Here are some facts:

Jensen went to Kripke and asked if he had anything for him after SPN ended. Kripke helped him craft his audition until it would be acceptable for the other producers. We know this happened because Jensen told us, and he talked about it multiple times. There is nothing wrong with him going to Kripke for work. This is networking, and it’s what actors should do.

Jared never once publicly asked to be on The Boys. At most, he answered fan questions when asked what kind of character he’d like to play, but he never actually hinted he wanted a part. In articles, when asked if he’d join, Jared essentially said he was too busy filming Walke, in a polite way. Also fact, Kripke has hinted at wanting Jared on The Boys before Walker was cancelled, and he did so publically. Then when Walker was cancelled, Kripke really ramped up the public pitches to get Jared on the show, and was publicly psyched when Jared finally agreed. Jared never, publicly at least, even asked or hinted at wanting to be on The Boys, never mind begged.

Misha hinted multiple times publicly, including tagging Kripke on social media directly, that he’d like to be on the show. Kripke never said anything publicly, as far as I’m aware, about wanting or trying to get Misha on the show prior to the announcement from yesterday. When he talked about getting the biggest SPN Pokémon, it was when Jared finally signed on. When he talked about breaking the internet again, it was in reference to a J2 reunion on screen. When he talked about reuniting the SPN trio, it was in reference to JA, JP and JDM, not Misha. Was Kripke always planning to include Misha once he finally got Jared? Maybe. Is it possible he wasn’t going to bother with Misha until or unless he got Jared too? Yes. He could have hired Misha on at any time before and never did. Misha definitely publicly begged to be on the show, and Kripke never said anything in return to, or regarding, him being on the show until now. Kripke probably only brought him on because he thought of something funny/gross/trolling to do with J2 and him on screen.

Ultimately, I would have preferred not to have Misha in The Boys because when I finally get to see J2 on screen together, I didn’t really want him there, too. It feels like trying to shoehorn Castiel in with the brothers again from forced SPN scenes. But, I’ve also lost interest in the show itself, so I’ll probably pick and choose what moments I bother to watch anyway.

That being said, The Boys has a whole cast beyond Jensen being a regular in Season 5, never mind it being a giant J2 reunion that will take up a bunch of screen time. So, adding Misha to the mix isn’t exactly robbing fans of long and significant J2 moments on screen. (Though I’d still be happy for him not to be in their scenes at all).

Honestly, Kripke probably wanted Jared so bad, at least in part, so he could bank on free publicity in social media from Jared and J2 fans. He already had the Jensen fans on board. Similarly, he probably decided to add Misha for the same reason. Happy or not about his addition, people are talking about it on many social media platforms, this bring free attention yo the show.

Kripke just wants publicity.

What I want is to get out of this is at least one solid (hopefully more), Misha-less moment between J2 on screen.

But people are really losing their shit over what might amount to like 5 minutes of screen time from Jared and/or Misha. Jensen’s Soldier Boy isn’t even one of the main cast members, even either him being a regular this season, so I doubt there will be a lot of room to expand on a character for Jared (never mind Misha) and then interacting, on a show that’s on its final season and has many storylines to wrap up.

Anyway, in conclusion, only one member of J2M begged for a part in The Boys, and Kripke is using all of them to generate buzz. Simple as that.

[crushpunky]

kook!reader introduces her new “friend”

Y/n could feel her hands shake as they neared the patio of the country club. She could see Topper and Kelce entranced in conversation, but her eyes quickly met Rafe’s, almost as if he had been looking for her. She noticed as they locked onto her before switching to the figure behind you… Peter.

Y/n wasn’t one for relationships. She had decided in high school, after years of hanging out with the boys, that she knew what she wanted in a man and wasn’t willing to compromise… so she didn’t. Instead, she spent her teenage years on random hookups, occasionally finding a guy that piqued her interest before he ultimately ghosted her a week later. It was draining, seeing as Topper and Kelce seemed to find their way into relationships with nice girls as easy as breathing. Rafe, like y/n, wasn’t one for relationships, however, for much different reasons. He had always told her he wasn’t ready to commit, but that wasn’t the whole truth…

“Hello!” Peter said, waving to the boys enthusiastically. Peter was a sweet boy, had the same interests as y/n, and was undeniably cute. The two of them had been chatting for a few weeks, even going as far as going on a few dates, and Peter showed no signs of slowing down his charming behavior. When he suggested he meet her friends she talked so much about, y/n was hesitant. Not because she was embarrassed of them, of course, but more because she was fearful of their… possessiveness over her.

“Who is this?” Topper said bluntly as y/n neared the table. Silently, Rafe moved to pull out a chair for her, but was stopped when Peter did so a split second before him.

“This is… Peter.” Y/n said quietly, gesturing to the boy still standing behind her. Peter grinned, shaking hands with Topper and Kelce before moving on to Rafe, who simply glared at him.

“You didn’t tell us you were bringing a… friend.” Rafe said, leaning onto the table with his elbows. Y/n looked at him, her hands fidgeting with the hem of her shorts, starting to ramble out a response before Peter cut in.

“That’s my bad, I sort of asked this morning. Last minute.” Peter said, placing a hand on y/n’s shoulder.

“Well we only got a table for four so…” Kelce trailed off, gesturing to the full table. 

“And it’s pretty full.” Topper added with a nod. Y/n could feel her cheeks warm. She should’ve known this was going to be a bad idea, inviting him to their weekly Sunday brunch. It was too intimate, too personal, of course they wouldn’t like a change in their routine. She felt so embarrassed, so—

“Oh another one?” A waiter appeared behind them, eyeing the still standing boy. It was a blessing and a curse that there happened to be an empty chair sitting nearby, the club usually packed to the brim for Sunday brunch. The waiter took it, sliding it between Topper and y/n with a grin.

“Thank you,” Peter nodded to the waiter before taking a seat.

“Is this why you said you didn’t need me to pick you up this morning?” Rafe asked. He should’ve known something was up when y/n texted him this morning saying she had to run some errands that morning and didn’t need him to pick her up. Every Sunday he picked her up, greeting her with an iced coffee (she didn’t like the coffee at the country club) before heading in for brunch.

“Take your elbows off the table, Rafe.” Y/n said, ignoring Rafe’s question as she picked up the menu in front of her, looking it over as if she didn’t order the same thing every Sunday. Rafe scoffed before taking his elbows off the table, leaning back into his seat.

“So, Peter, right?” Topper said, obviously taking in the tense atmosphere before the two best friends and deciding it was best for him to take control of the conversation.

“Yes. It’s great to finally meet you guys, I've heard so much about you.” Peter says, resting his arm on the back of y/n’s chair.

“Interesting, I haven’t heard anything about you.” Rafe said as he took a sip of his bloody mary. Y/n eyed him threateningly, to which he raised his hands in faux innocence.

“Um, well… I’m going to UNC in the fall.” Peter said.

“Oh, wow,” Topper nodded before allowing the conversation to fall silent.

“Peter is studying chemistry. He wants to be a chemical engineer.” Y/n said, looking over to Peter with a soft smile.

“Remember when Rafe wanted to be an engineer?” Kelce said, causing Topper and y/n to burst out laughing at the very thought. Rafe shook his head, a small smirk forming on his face at the memory of his childhood ignorance.

“Yeah, that nerd shit’s definitely not for me.” Rafe said with a scoff, causing y/n to elbow him in the ribs. Peter let out a nervous chuckle, moving to rest his hands in his lap. Rafe quickly replaced Peter's arm, draping his own across the back of y/n’s chair.

“Well… I’m sure you’re working with your father, right?” Peter said, taking a sip from one of the glasses of water that sat on the table.

“Yep.” Rafe said bluntly, his eyes not leaving Peter.

“Um, that sounds like a great opportunity. Your father is a very well respected figure in the community.” Peter said. Y/n could feel herself flinch at his words. Of course there was no way he could know about the real Ward Cameron, but the fact that he brought him up and seemingly held him in such high regard made her stomach churn.

“Such a great opportunity,” Rafe chuckled. “I mean who doesn’t love working with their piece of shit father, right?”

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t know—” Peter quickly scrambled to backtrack, looking around at all the other faces at the table, none of which offering him any sort of backup in his unfortunate situation.

“Oh, of course not—” Rafe started to chirp back but was quickly cut off as the waiter returned to the table, food in his hands. He rounded the table, placing an entree in front of everyone before coming up empty handed in front of Peter.

“We put your order in before we knew about… your guest.” Kelce said quietly.

“It’s fine, I’ll just… eat some of y/n’s.” Peter said, which made Rafe laugh.

“I’d like to see you try and take some of her pancakes. She might bite your hand off.” Rafe said before stuffing a forkful of eggs into his mouth.

“I didn’t realize you were such a big fan of pancakes.” Peter chuckled nervously, looking over at y/n.

“Yeah… they’re my favorite food, actually.” Y/n said with a nod before beginning to cut into her breakfast.

“Oh yeah, I remembered you saying that…” Peter trailed off, the conversation once again dying.

“So, Peter, you a big party guy?” Topper said, his mouth full with bacon.

“Oh, no.” Peter laughed. “Not a big fan of that stuff… a bit too mind numbing for me, y’know? Half naked girls skanking around whatever drunk guy looks their way… kinda sad what we’ve come to.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Y/n said, raising an eyebrow at his comment. Peter seemed like a textbook nice guy and they had a lot in common… right?

“I mean… come on. You’ve seen how girls dress these days. More dressed like they’re going to the corner than a party.” Peter laughed, looking at the guys around the table. Y/n could feel her stomach drop at how quickly her nice, new “friend” seemed to switch up on her the second it came to winning the boy's approval, acting like she wasn’t even there as he talked about girls.

“Well, I like to go to parties, does that make me like those girls?” Y/n asked, her arms now crossed and her brows furrowed. Though she couldn’t see, Rafe was fighting back a grin at her aggravated state. She was unshakeable when she got like this, and Rafe couldn’t wait to see her dish it out to poor, poor Peter.

“Of course not,” Peter said, “that’s why I like you. You’re such a nice girl, don’t talk back or complain. Don’t flirt around. Super sweet and respectable.”

“‘Don’t talk back’? ‘Flirt around’? Fucking ‘respectable’? That’s what makes a ‘good girl’?” Y/n scoffed. How could she have been so wrong about him? Trusted him enough to introduce her to her fucking friends, and this is how he acts? Embarasses her?

“C’mon, don’t go and get offended now—” Peter chuckled, looking around at the boys for any sort of backup, to which they all gave him blank stares.

“How about you go and fuck yourself, how about that?” Y/n said sharply.

“Don’t be like that—” Peter moved to grab her hand, to which Rafe stood from his chair, nearly knocking it to the floor as he grabbed Peter by the back of his shirt. Rafe quickly hauled him out of his seat, half dragging him off the patio and into the parking lot. Topper, Kelce, and y/n got out of their seats, running to catch up with Rafe as he tossed Peter to the pavement. Kelce and Topper each grabbed one of his arms, pulling him back from pouncing on the boy as he sat up on the concrete.

“Jesus, what the fuck is your problem?” Peter scrambled to his feet, wiping some dirt off of his pants.

“Get out of here, Peter.” Y/n said through her teeth.

“Seriously? Your fucking lapdog freaks out cause someone touches his bitch and—” Peter was cutoff with a swift slap to the face… from y/n.

“Get the fuck out of here, Peter.” Y/n said, her hand stinging from the impact of the slap. Peter looked between her and the boys in horror before scampering away to his car. Y/n kept her eyes on him as he sped out of the parking lot before turning to the boys… all three of which had huge grins plastered on their faces.

“Damn, girl.” Rafe said, shaking Topper and Kelce off of him. Y/n exhaled before letting out a laugh.

“Who knew you had such an arm on you?” Topper said, shaking y/n’s shoulder lightly.

“I think I saw his soul leave his body, actually.” Kelce added with a laugh.

“Fuck that guy.” Y/n said, running a hand through her hair.

“Fuck that guy.” Rafe said, pulling y/n into a hug. “We’re the only guys you need, girl.”

“Ugh.” Y/n let out a groan into Rafe’s shirt, only causing him to hug her tighter, Topper and Kelce joining him in as they all crowded y/n in a suffocating embrace.

“I knew that guy was sus.” Kelce clarified as they finally let y/n out of their hugs.

“You would’ve thought any guy was ‘sus’.” Y/n chuckled leaning into Rafe, his arm still slung over her shoulder as they started walking back toward the patio.

“Just looking out for our girl.” Rafe said, pulling y/n’s chair out from the table as she rolled her eyes before sitting down. The four of them sat at the table eating their food, joking and laughing for hours, the time flying as the friends basked in each other’s presence.

Maybe they were right. Maybe they were the only guys she needed: her best friends.

[austinsastrology8991]

> MC ASPECTS < How you renowned around town “You make your own reality. And once you’ve done it, apparently, everyone’s of the opinion it was all so fucking obvious.” - Logan - Fucking - ROy

!!parental advisory explicit!!

MC Aspecting Sun - “rome, I think you're a super talented superstar and I love you” - Shiv Roy : Its hard not to notice you, you got a poise of regality, and you work the public sphere with ease; you put yourself out there and you get a lot of attention from onlookers - and it makes you one of a kind. you are someone with dignity and maybe too much self respect for some, to give you the credit that you do deserve > because no one does it quite like you - high key a dominant force in any room you enter - wolf of wall street vibes and lets be honest you are not above having a party at the office... and paying hookers to make it more cool...... you do the most and its a vibe vibe MC Aspecting Moon - "They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had, and add some extra just for you" - Therapist in succession You know how to put people at ease, and your basically a professional therapist at this point. You can lighten up anyones mood or piss everyone off depending on how you feel. And this understanding of psychology really benefits you; because people want to treat you right, so you can give them some insight as to why they have a mental breakdown every 5 minutes (this generations daily cycle) your like a dog that lives in a hair-salon and everyone wanna get a cuddle from it/he/she/thing/you

MC Aspecting Mercury - “Information, Greg, it’s like a bottle of fine wine. You store it, you hoard it, you save it for a special occasion and then you smash someone’s face with it.” - Tom Wambsgams When you stfu people are wondering what your thinking. because somehow. someway. you've taken control of the conversation, and whatever you say is taken with heavier consideration then the average person. However that does not mean you get your way, it just means we listen to you the most - easily the most valuable insight comes from you guys, and your perceived as. a hustler. no wonder your careful with ur words because you dont really care about getting the right answer in the known, if that ultimately inteferes with your master plan you'll just stay quiet - because you know how to navigate the world with words, and your aware that ultimately the final word - the best word - is the deciding factor of what we do MC Aspecting Venus - "Here’s the thing about being rich, okay? It’s fucking great. It’s like being a superhero, only better. You get to do what you want — the authorities can’t really touch you. You get to wear a costume, but it’s designed by Armani and it doesn’t make you look like a prick." - Tom Wambsgams Beauty pageants. Everyone is interested in you, because your beautiful and your graceful, and you'd make a fine edition to the list of exes that everyone has. So besides the fact that your fuckable, you know how to charm people so easily and thats why you get so much attention, and its positive unless your insecure about how attractive you are.... which is a real thing... and id say just get that plastic surgery or stfu and find some real solutions. i mean has anyone ever tried to tell a beautiful person, that they beautiful.... its exhausting... and then they just look for someone else (more beautiful) to get that validation. its a death trap!!! dont fall for that bs... but damn yo fine ass better get used to being a fine ass or someone gonna commit a crime on yo ass MC Aspecting Mars - "I got a track record from founding one of the most exciting new media brands in the world. And what do you got? Track marks from shooting junk? Thanks for coming down. It was great to meet you." - Lawyrence Yee Unfuckwitable - you embody the underdog - and i mean an under dog thorugh and through; youll bark at anything that pisses yall offf, and thats why people watch they step around yall, no one wanna get bitten by da big dog with a small dog complex. but your fierce and people try their best to match your aggressive energy just to save face for themselves - meanwhile your just more pissed off that you always gotta show yo teeth to anyone you talk to lol. Your competitive and act like crackhead that knows karate. everyone is low key intimidated by ya, and you know it

MC Aspecting Jupiter - "Most things don't exist. the ford motor company hardly exists. It's just a time saving expression for a collection of financial interests." - Logan RoyEveryone likes you, and sometimes you don't even understand why, and thats just another reason to like you. You show a geniune uninterest in any boring mundane activities > and this lack of care for bullshit makes it so that when you do show an interest for something > you've somehow convinced everyone in the room that your enthusiasm defines whats enjoyable. and this discernment makes others believe that your the new budha for socio-economic observations . I respect it. and you did it without even realizing, like thats a feat initself, and you guys are 100 feet tall in everyone elses eyes because you got a name fo yo self MC aspecting Saturn - "the actual fact is we're persuading more and more shareholders everyday that we offer them just a slightly better chance for them to make a little bit more money on the dollar…and that's all that this is…." - Stewy Hosseini The boss is here and now everyone gotta actually do something productive. you guys have respect, and people know that if they don't come at you correctly, then you'll correct it for them, and no one wanna be daddied by the king kong daddy. Your life is defined by hardships and this is the most noticeable trait about yall, and it has molded you into a gus fring. A stone cold killer. You don't have to say much but the weight of your presence in itself, is so much pressure, that everyone wanna ask for more time, but no one wanna be scolded by yall so we just stfu and deal with it MC Aspecting Uranus - "Nothing is a line. Everything, everywhere is always moving. Forever. Get used to it." - Logan Roy Who is they? who are we? why can they get away with acting like a complete fucking retard? Well they don't 'get away with it' they just fucking do it. I mean the balls on ya'll is undeniable, but the audacity and the concept of why. well no one knows and I don't think you do either. But you literally change the game wherever you go, because you do ridiculous shit just to make fun of reality, and it really does expose how much of a cult we all live in; since we all about our own rituals of bullshit. I applaud the audacity but everyone gets nervous around your unpredictable nervous explosions - your like a charged creeper; youve been shocked by something and now you just have to explode and ruin everyones buildings

MC Aspecting Neptune - "Climate said I was going down. Climate said I should just step aside. I guess I'm a climate denier" - Logan Roy You're imagination personified. You somehow write your favourite stories into reality > and you do this so uncosnciosuly thst you've somehow convinced everyone its real. You don't care much for whats actually real, you'd rather manifest what you want to be real > no matter whats being thrown at you (and theres a lot) you have a uncanny ability to be a energy conduit > and transform that energy into what pleases you the most. And because of this you appear to be a mystic. and theres a tendency to be very calm, and if life throws too much shit at you > and you've ran outta favours, its adios to the world. and the long road of finding your purpose again awaits! MC Aspecting Pluto - "Would you like to hear my favourite passage from Shakespear? Take the fucking money." - Logan Roy You are daunting aren't you. people don't talk to you very much, at least not any normal self abiding citizen. you look like TMNT - you look neglected > look like you ate some radioactive poison > became this mutant thing > and was raised by a rat that could beat your ass... how'd that go? you look great! I would shake your hand but Im honestly afraid your gonna bite me. Look your life is intense and borderline traumatic, I get it. but this makes you so mesmerising > you can have the whole room in a trance with your dark aura, and people just hand you power like its nothing. You don't even care tho, and thats what makes you even more powerful lol > if anyone can handle the dark. its you > and a powerful 'rep' requires someone who doesn't fuck around. and you do not

highly highly recommend succession > all the quotes used are from dat show - and its a fkn masta piece

[meanbossart]

so did drow do the unholy assassination ritual or did he just kill sarevok? what was his relationship like with him pre-tadpoling?

He went along into the inner sanctum of the murder tribunal and I BELIEVE he did kill the annoying little flying elephant, but I'm not sure, to be honest, but probably.

However, I then decided that the vibes were off and proceeded to attack Sarevok instead of proceeding with the ritual. This gave way to what was probably the coolest and most cinematic fight of the game for me!

If you trigger that fight in the sanctum (where Valeria and the blood pool is) it is a fair bit more difficult than if you were to attack earlier; Sarevok has like 20 minions who help him out and keep giving him sanctuary, and if you don't know what you're doing (which I most certainly didn't) you can get your ass handed to you very easily.

... And that is very much what happened! DU drow was downed, Shadowheart was buffing like her life depended on it, and Gale was doing something vaguely important, I'm sure. Point is that it was a desperate situation. I then for the first time used Astarion's Danse Macabre spell that he got from the Necromancy of Thay, and summoned six individually controllable ghouls which proceeded to gang up on Sarevok and shred him to pieces, distracting him and giving Astarion the chance to pick DU drow's ass up and finish the fight. This was cool as hell. And frankly it was a scene as formative for the characters as any cutscene or dialogue to me, if not more so.

(The ghouls were severely nerfed at some point shortly after the release of the game, alas. Which I lament, because Astarion coming to that type of power after turning Ascension down - one much less glamorous or impressive but cool nonetheless - felt incredibly poetic to me.)

Prior to suffering from amnesia, DU drow and Sarevok's relationship was... Interesting. They kind of held each other at arms length while also being vaguely buddy-buddy with one another, they disagreed on many things regarding how the church should be ran, but ultimately came together in the pursuit of one goal - making a pair out of DU drow and Orin. DU drow, as we know, was just in love with her, and towards the end of his Bhaalist career he would have accepted reciprocation even if it had to happen under the pressure and influence of the Bhaalist cult. Sarevok, on the other hand, just wanted them to breed and produce more powerful bhaalspawn, and had no investment in either of their feelings.

DU drow went from finding Sarevok's methods reprehensible to completely turning a blind eye to them. He recognized that Sarevok only wanted babies out of the arrangement and very much treated Orin unfavorably for being the difficult party. Believe it or not, there was a point where DU drow put her wishes first and his personal feelings second.

Then, as the years went on and so did the isolation and brain-washing, DU drow grew desperate enough to not only allow, but encourage Sarevok to put the pressure on Orin to give into his wishes, even if it never worked.

I also believe DU drow modeled himself off of Sarevok a lot. He was kind of an uncle-like figure to him that he both mocked for his antiquate beliefs WRT to running the cult, but also aspired to replace and to eventually instill the same fear as he once did.

[k1ngdom-of-thieves]

I've had this in my mind for the longest time now so here goes!

Riddle, Leona, and Malleus has a crush on MC, and one day they find MC trying to write... *gasp* a love letter! But they went "Oh, that isnt right... Maybe I'll find the words later." and tried to throw it away, only for it to end up in the boys' hands. How would they react when they realize the letter is addressed to them?

Thank you for sending an ask! Thank you so much for your patience.

Riddle, Leona, and Malleus + Finding Reader writing a love letter!

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle isn’t usually one to pry, especially when it involves affairs that don’t involve him, but you looked like you needed help writing a letter. Something he could definitely help with if you needed help articulating words.

When he saw you toss it away, he was a little confused but ultimately decided to leave it alone. That was until he noticed his name written in cursive on the front of the paper.

Does he know that’s incredibly invasive? Yes, but you seemed really stressed out over something you could just tell him yourself. He was a smidge worried.

So he reads the letter and is shocked with the revelation of you having a crush on him. He read it multiple times, trying to see if this was a joke or not. After thinking about it for a while, he decided to just go up to you and ask.

“Do you have a moment? I’d like to know if you were also interested in me? Pardon me for being so blunt, but I feel it’s best to just it off of my chest. *He then chuckles nervously*”

Leona Kingscholar

Leona also usually doesn’t get into people’s business, mostly because you couldn’t pay him to care. But he sees Grim pulling on your sleeve towards him with a letter in your hand in the distance and he starts to believe that this might become his business soon.

He didn’t move a muscle. If you were gonna come to him, then he’d talk to you about it. However, he thought it was kinda funny to just watch you try to avoid this.

You manage to get Grim to drop it and you guys go off to buy tuna. What you didn’t notice was that the letter had fallen from your hands and Leona picked it up. He says that he was gonna get up anyway, but you know that’s bs.

He reads the letter with a smug expression on his face, and chuckles to himself as he finishes reading. He now sets off to let you know your so called “one-sided feelings” aren’t actually so one-sided.

“Hey, herbivore. You could’ve just said you like me. Didn’t need to do a whole song and dance about trying to avoid it.”

Malleus Draconia

Malleus watched as you crumpled up yet another piece of paper, wondering what could possibly make you this nervous and upset. In fact, he was just about to get up and ask when you got up and left the library.

The fae walked over to where you were sitting and picked up one of the papers. He justified to himself that he was just cleaning up, but in reality he was just nosy. He started to read one and was surprised to see that they were all addressed to him. He picked up another letter, and just like he thought, it was also meant for him.

After he finished reading one of the more complete letters, he felt his face flush and his heart beat a little faster. His favorite human had feelings for him? Was this a dream?

He knew that he had to come to you right away, but decided that he should also write his feelings in a little letter. The man thought the idea was simply adorable.

So, he walked up to you as usual and gave you the letter with an expectant look. His eyes lit up as you became increasingly flustered reading his letter.

“So child of man, am I safe to assume we share the same feelings? There would be no greater honor than being yours.”

[aurasy3ag3r]

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤 𝐜.𝐬𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫

☆ summary : Connie moves in next door to Yn and sparks fly. Despite their differences, they bond over their shared interest and dreams, as they spend more and more time together they become more than 'just neighbors'

☆ parings : chef connie x blackfem reader.

☆ wc : 800

A few weeks had gone by since you met Connie, and there wasn’t much communication—just a quick wave here and there, but nothing like the first night you met. Tonight, you could hear Connie hosting a “get-together” with his friends. You tried not to eavesdrop, but they were loud, and the walls were thin, so you couldn’t help it.

“Man, if you don’t invite her over, I’m gonna go over there and do it myself.” You were confused. Not wanting to assume they were talking about you, you moved your head closer to the wall. You couldn't hear much and ultimately decided what you were doing was weird, so you stopped.

‘Knock Knock’

“Huh.”

You were confused by the knock at your door. Maybe it was about you? When you opened the door, there stood two guys. One was tall like Connie, with brown hair in a cute little man bun and intense green eyes that you tried not to stare at. The other guy was a few inches taller than you, pale, and blonde. “Hi, we’re friends of Connie, and he’s being a wuss about inviting you over for some wine.” Your eyes widened at what the blonde boy said. What you heard was definitely about you. “He has some high-quality wine.” The taller guy smiled and pointed at Connie, who was at his door holding a bottle of wine, waiting for you to accept their invitation.

“I love wine.” “Perfect, come with us.” You giggled at the taller guy and followed them, closing your door behind you. You had on a long cardigan and a lounge dress underneath, while everyone else looked dressed up. When you walked into the apartment, it felt like a whole other building. Your apartment was full of art, while Connie’s lacked it. Seeing his apartment, you thought of all the places where your art could fit. “Hi, neighbor, sorry about those two.” You smiled, and Connie handed you a glass of wine. It was delicious—sweet but not too sweet, just the way you liked your wine. “Connie, are you gonna introduce us?” You looked over at the few people on Connie’s couch and waved.

“Obviously, this is my neighbor, Yn. And Yn, these are my friends. You met Eren and Armin; that’s Sasha and Mikasa; and Jean is the one on the floor.” You nervously waved at everyone, and they waved back. “Come over here; I’m gonna pour you a glass of wine.” You walked over to Connie’s counter, away from his friends. “I was told you have some good wine.” Connie chuckled as he poured a glass of red wine. He slid over the glass, and you almost immediately took a small sip. Eren did not lie; his wine was amazing.

“I’ve been meaning to go over and cook for you.” Your eyes widened, and you took another sip of the wine. “Well, I’ve been waiting to try some of your food. Why haven’t you come over?” You placed the glass down and waited for Connie to answer. “To be honest, I was nervous.” “Nervous? I don’t bite.” Connie playfully rolled his eyes, and you giggled at his reaction. “A pretty girl like you makes me nervous.” Connie made his way closer to where you stood. “Well, we can have a celebratory dinner on Saturday if you’d like.” Connie smiled and nodded. “What are we celebrating?”

“Well, I’m hosting an art show on Friday. It’s not my first, but it’s my biggest art show yet.” Connie paid attention to how excited you got talking about your art show. “And I would love to invite you and your friends if you want to go. It’s downtown, nothing too fancy.” “I would love to go; I bet they would too. Right, guys?” Connie looked over at his friends, and they all looked confused. “Sorry, we can’t hear you over Sasha and Jean arguing.” “Yn is hosting an art show on Friday, and she invited us.”

The rest of the night went smoothly. You got to know his friends better and spent the rest of the night playing games and drinking more wine. Apparently, too much wine, because now you were alone with Connie, dying of laughter watching Spongebob.

“Fuck, it’s getting late; I should head home now.” Connie frowned but helped you get up from the floor. “We could also just have a sleepover.” You giggled at Connie, and he smiled. “Maybe another day.” Connie held the door open for you and followed you until you arrived at your door. “I had a really good time tonight. Your friends were really cool too.” “I’m glad you had a good time. Hope we can do it again, without my crazy friends.” You giggled and softly slapped Connie’s shoulder. “They were great. I’ll make sure to send you six tickets for Friday.” Connie smiled. He was looking forward to buying some of your art.

“Well, goodnight, pretty lady.” You blew Connie a kiss as he walked backwards to his apartment like a dummy.

hope yall enjoyed ... AND I KNOWWWWW its been a while yall im sorryyyyyyyyyyyy please accept my apology with this :)))

I will be posting some sports fics soon (;;;

[cameronspecial]

hey lovely!! i’ve been thinking about rafe spoiling angel and taking her to those cute little stores with all of the cute plushies and stuff. idk, but i absolutely love your work, and i literally giggle and kick my feet when i see that you’ve written more 😛

ilysm pookieeee 😋😋

Let Me Spoil You, Angel

Pairing: Frat!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of Sex

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 1.0K

A/N: Thank you so much. It makes me giddy that you enjoy my work!

Masterlist

Y/N had just found out that she got into her top-choice Master’s Program and Rafe couldn’t be more proud of her. She’s been working so hard, so he wants to reward her for her accomplishments. “Rafe, why are we at the mall? You know I mostly shop at outlet stores,” she complains. Rafe brings her to his side, “I know, but why don’t you let me spoil you, Angel?” She exhales and bobs her head. “Fine, but not more than a hundred dollars,” she limits. She really does love it when he pampers her, but she needs to set some boundaries or else he’ll buy the whole mall. He shakes his head, “One thousand.”

“Two-fifty.” 

“Five hundred.”

“Fine, except I get to buy dinner.”

Rafe is satisfied with the offer and holds his hand out for her. He doesn’t want her to feel guilty about him always spending money on her. The first stop on their tour is the bookstore. He purposefully picked this mall because of the big indie bookstore inside. This is probably where she’ll spend most of her money. She has been browsing the science section of the store for about ten minutes now and has already picked out a few books. Rafe wants her to choose whatever she wants; however, he has a small request. He resets his chin on her shoulder, “Could you throw in some spicy romance books? I like proving to you that I am the ultimate book boyfriend.” Y/N giggles, remembering what happened when he caught her reading Icebreaker. She takes his hand and heads over to the romance section. She browses the books for a few minutes and picks one out. She examines the back, proceeding to add the whole series into the basket. “What’s the book about?” he asks because he is intrigued by the fact that she wants to buy all four books. She smiles at her, “The first one is a grump x sunshine book. She is a photographer and he is rich and her brother’s best friend. I’ve seen it on Bookstagram.” 

He follows her further down, “That sounds interesting. I can’t wait to see where it has us having sex next.” Shy about his words, Y/N turns her head away and continues to look at the books. They spend about forty minutes in the bookstore before moving on to  Miniso. Y/N stares at the wall of stuffed animals in front of her. She knows she wants one, but can’t decide which to choose. “Okay, so there are four possible ones that I want. The penguin, the cat, the bear, or the banana. Which one do you think, Rafe?” she consults. Rafe doesn’t use words to reply; instead, he goes to each one she points out and puts it inside the bag. He adds an elephant in just because he thinks she’ll find it cute. “Rafe, that’s too many. Where am I going to put them?” she reasons, trying to reach into the bag to return some of the plushies. 

He holds his hand out to stop her, “It’s still within your budget. We can put them in the frat storage if there isn’t space in my room and when we find a house in the summer, we just have to make sure there is enough room for them.” “Okay, I guess we can do that. Come on. I want to buy you some things too,” she tells him. They pay for the toys and she drags him to J. Crew. “You don’t have to use the money on me. It’s supposed to be for you.” She turns to him with a grin, “I know. This is for me too. You are going to do a fashion show for me.” Rafe isn’t one to like going shopping, but he will find joy in it if Y/N enjoys it. 

Y/N sits on the little stool Rafe got a sales associate to bring over, waiting for him to come out of the changing room. The door opens and he comes out wearing the teal and white-stripped button-up shirt with the tanned chinos that she picked for him. He does his best to catwalk towards her and spins around for her to take in the full look. “What do we think?” he questions. She gives him a thumbs up, “Rafe, you look so good. We are definitely getting those.” He nods his head before going back to the changing room to try on the next outfit. He comes out in black shorts and a light blue polo, which compliments his eyes. He mocks taking a golf swing, “This is the perfect outfit for golfing. We are going to have to get you a matching one.”

“I don’t golf, Rafe. You know that.” 

“I do, but don’t you think it would be fun to have a matching outfit? I can teach you how to play.” 

“Fine, it would be cool. We can go next week. Now, go finish trying on the rest of the clothes.”

He gives her a mock solute. After trying on the other outfits, they get her a matching outfit to Rafe’s and then go pay. They head to his car, having spent five hundred dollars in almost three hours. It’s a new record for them honestly. Rafe opens the passenger side door for her and she slides into the seat with a thank you. He puts the shopping bags in the trunk, making his way to the diver’s side. “Did you have a good day?” he postulates. His eyes land on her beaming mouth and she holds his chin in between her fingers. Her head moves up and down, “I had the best day. Thank you for spoiling me, Rafe.” She gives him a sweet kiss. “I will always shower my angel with gifts. Now, where are you treating me to dinner?” “Let’s get sushi!” she announces, pointing her finger in forward. He chuckles at how adorable she is and starts the car, driving in the direction of her favourite sushi restaurant.

Taglist: @winterrrnight @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @queen-shadow22 @nonbullshit-toleratingkindagirl

[leonawriter]

On A(yin) and Unreliable Narration - or, "Did They Hate Him, Really?", the Story of a Depressed Man

One of those funny things about Lobotomy Corporation is that, just like many, many games out there... it puts you into the shoes of the protagonist. Almost literally, as it's designed to look like a player insert game.

But, see... it isn't.

The similarities are - at the start - that you seem not to have a name, you can't see what you look like, there's a character helping you and explaining the world, you're amnesiac, and you're suddenly given something big to do.

Those fall apart really quickly.

(Spoilers/references to endgame LobCorp, Ruina and Limbus as well in the post.)

Firstly, Angela tells the player their name. Or rather, that you are now called "X." She does not give you an option of which name to input, just as later on, Faust does not give the option to name "me" in Limbus Company and the player character is named "Dante." Both times, that decision is taken out of the player's hands.

From this moment forth, you are not playing "you," you are playing as a character that the developers have named, characterised, and already decided on. And this shows itself through all of the choices they take from then on, and the story they take you on.

Just focusing on "X," we don't often get to see what he's thinking and feeling himself. The very, very few times are usually either a multiple choice question, or right at the very end - and no matter what, he doesn't speak very much. He uses short sentences... from what we can see, at least.

This is on Day 5, but... you get the idea. X doesn't really say much more than this at a time.

But- wait. Look at that. Here's something interesting that I loved picking up when going through Persona 5-

The fact that each one of these comments is simply a sliding scale of the same thing.

You, as the player, literally cannot have X say to Angela here "I've been having a great time! Absolutely loving it, thanks." Because that... isn't how X feels.

The truth is that as of Day 5, X has only got memories of the past five days. His entire life has been one of managing a facility of death and fear, with everyone looking to him for guidance. No shit he's going to say that his life has been awful.

Which handily already gives him defined personality characteristics that do, actually, stick with him all the way through to the endgame.

This is someone who does not enjoy being in a position like this. He does not enjoy seeing wanton death and destruction. He does not like being in charge, and responsible for everything.

All of which neatly destroys the player's ability to insert themself into the Manager's role as themself, and take control. This is his company. You are playing the managerial equivalent of a first person shooter with your character on mute most of the time, but everyone else can (effectively) see and hear him as his own person.

Which leads on to the biggest thing:

How do the others interact with him? How do they see him? Does he say things that we don't hear? What are their opinions of him?

Now, the ones we get to see X through are really just the Sephirot, Carmen (to a degree, through memories) and Angela. There's the Keter, but they're a special case.

It's basically impossible to talk about "Manager X" without looking into his past as "A, the Founder of Lobotomy Corporation" - or, rather, as we find out on Day 50, "Ayin."

Because each of them are simply one part of a whole, really. And the simple fact is that the only reason I tend to differentiate them with calling the character from the start "X" and the one later on (from around the mid-point onward) "A" is that this way, we know which point in time we're talking about.

All of them are however, ultimately, all Ayin.

"It's all Ayin, all along?" "Always has been."

Now, the easy part is to say "the Sephirot hate Ayin!" and... to be honest, that's kinda true. They do not get along. Any of them- no, Hokma, we're not talking about you, you're an outlier and should not be counted for this. Sit your gay ass down.

Truth is, as Kali/Gebura said, after her suppression:

ID: "When we first reawakened in metal, we could feel the exact moment our final breath stopped, lodged into us like glass shards."

So, effectively, they're like angry ghosts full of resentment that have never been able to move on from that unfinished business. And, unfortunately, all of that unfinished business revolves around Ayin, the character we're playing as. No wonder they're all angry at him! and that's not even taking into consideration the issues they'd have had before they died!

So: Malkuth is mad because her resentment stems from desperately wanting Ayin's praise and attention as Elijah, to the point that she pushed herself further than she should have, did something he hadn't given the approval for (but Carmen did), and died horribly for it, with him not able to face something horrendously awful happening to someone he'd tried to say "don't do that" to.

All she can see, however, is how she had tried her hardest to be noticed and still got ignored. That's where her meltdown comes from.

Yesod's comes from, basically, seeing the aftermath of Elijah's (awful, awful) death and gaining a level of OCD over it. I don't use that term lightly here; he gains an overly stringent obsession over rules and regulations, and believes that something may have gotten onto his skin, leading to him self-harming himself in order to get this off (and it is not there). Ayin, not having any surety that this is all just in Gabriel's head, orders an invasive examination to ensure that nothing infectious is actually going on. Remember: this is the City. They are in a laboratory. This is very plausible.

However, there never was anything of the sort, and Gabriel is simply more traumatised than ever. Both of them simply have to live with that now, and Yesod's meltdown comes from trying to - as he had as Gabriel - push down his grief and despair until it simply exploded.

Hod was a teenager at most when she was working for the lab in its original form, a nervous girl who Ayin warned - quite harshly, even! - what she was getting into with them. Carmen says "Don't be too harsh on her. She's amazing to be here at such a young age!" and the issue gets waved over like that. By the time people have died because of the experiments and they're handling abnormalities, however, she reaches her breaking point and... effectively calls the cops on them by saying that they're doing things that are Wrong, and because of that, the entire lab gets destroyed. Ayin remembers reading about her having died in the newspaper, and "never wanted [her] to die in misery, like that nasty tabloid article gossiped."

What is implied is that Michelle lived long enough to know that she'd made a massive mistake. She likely knew that instead of just having the company shut down and the research stopped, the Head was calling Arbiters on them. Perhaps whoever she told went "thank you for the tip-off, we'll deal with it" and when she assumed there'd be no bloodshed, she was corrected in her mistake. Whichever way, she knew what would happen, and she committed suicide because if she'd not wanted to face the things that she'd left behind, she couldn't live with the consequences of what she'd done.

Hod's meltdown happens because she's full of regret and she cannot move forward past the desire to be someone who hadn't been so weak to do such a thing in the first place. She wants to see herself as better than she was - but without having faced what she needs to be improving from.

Tiphereth's regret is, quite simply, that she doesn't understand why Enoch chose to die. The fact that Tiphereth B keeps malfunctioning for the same reason that she could never understand Enoch - that he asks questions about the meaning of existence - makes this harder on her. As Lisa, she never liked Carmen, and wanted to live in the moment, enjoying life as it was without thinking about it too hard, really. Enoch died, and she took it out on Carmen. We never really see what Lisa thought of Ayin himself directly, which places any ideas of how she saw him into headcanon territory.

Without Enoch, and knowing that he keeps coming back and hoping for something better, she ends up asking some of the same questions - "what are we doing all of this for?" - during her meltdown.

Chesed's is a cycle that's very easy to see how it's repeated with Angela. Ayin is told straight off by Carmen “He’s a bit pompous, so don’t believe everything he says." (Direct quote). Daniel continues to work with them, all the way through everything... right up until Garion comes along and terrifies the hell out of him into releasing abnormalities onto the lab, killing almost everyone.

Chesed's effectively forced to relive this over and over again via Angela telling him to do things that'll get the employees killed, keeping him in line with threats. Of note is the fact that with Carmen, Garion, and Angela, all of them hold levels of power over him. The phrase "No matter how great you may be, you will always be in the palm of my hand" is a recurring theme for him, and no wonder, when his trauma is based in the feeling of being used to hurt others no matter what he feels about that.

The other part is that when he truly needed Ayin to listen to him, during the Head's destruction of the lab, Ayin shut the intercom on him.

Gebura's is easier to quantify, much like Tiphereth's; she wanted to protect people, and her final moments that were etched into her head in the robot box form were of her rage at not being able to do so, and just wanting to lash out.

Hokma... okay, I will include Hokma here, because Benjamin's big regrets and resentments are that he didn't stop Ayin when Ayin went too far. He didn't see the signs and red flags saying "this man is not okay!" because he desperately wanted him to be okay. Because of that, he ignored his misgivings until he couldn't take it any longer, and left.

Binah is... interesting! At first, nothing seems personal. Other than the eternal torture, y'know. But then she does state that she sees herself and Ayin to be similar - in that they are both the kind of people who will shove their entire conscience away and do the necessary evil regardless. She also sees Ayin as the weak kind of man who can't actually change anything.

I bring up all of that without any of the post-suppression personality changes specifically because there's still an easy way of... seeing Ayin as this awful person, because we see him mostly through the eyes of people who hate his guts, in their worst possible moments. Which is easily enough to make people playing the game have a bad first impression of him, and then even when they're going through the core suppressions and winning, it's like "yeah, but he did all those things!"

I mean, Ayin was bad enough that he caused his best friend to walk away from him! When the things said best friend can be seen saying his his suppression are really, really gay. Like, so gay. Makes him seem like he's trying to constantly say "I want to be married to you" gay.

Thing is, Gebura even said it up there, quite plainly: they're stuck in their traumas. Their resentment. Their worst possible feelings.

And as everyone should know, no one is their worst possible self all the time!

So, let's go back over this. This time, taking everything they're saying with a pinch of salt because they're biased unreliable narrators. All of them. And this time, not in order.

I'm going to start with Chesed, because I feel like he has the most impactful things to say about Ayin as a person, and he goes through what appears to be the biggest 180 in his stance on the Manager in the game.

In fact, let's take a look at a couple of Chesed's quotes before and after:

Chesed [before]: Geez, manager. Do I really have to remind you that [Agent] has gone mad for you to notice?

Chesed [after]: [Agent] seems to be dealing with a mental break. Give ‘em the care they need, manager.

The "entire team wiped out" lines are also along the same lines.

Welp, all my competent employees are dead now. How are you going to compensate me for all this? Geez, how’d you even become the manager in the first place? The whole department is dead. It’s all over.

Compare this to-

Don’t worry about it too hard, manager. I saw you tried your best.

Now. Remember what I said about "no one is on their worst day every single day, except these people who are stuck in their worst traumatic emotional points"?

We see with Chesed a big hint of how this guy felt in his worst moment... versus how he wants to feel, when they've made up.

Which is to say - Chesed goes from blaming the Manager, assuming that he's sleeping on the job and not paying attention at all, to trusting him and being sure he tried his best. Which is a BIG difference!

It also fits with the swap from "Qlipoth" to "Sephirot" in terms of the actual Tree of Life/Kabbalah, in that the Sephirot in the game are positioned upside down at first, and are acting opposite to the virtues and qualities of their points on the tree that they're named after. Chesed is distrustful because he's been abandoned, but once they've come to an understanding, he is the basis of A being able to believe in people again.

And what is that A brings up much, much later on in the game, that Chesed told him?

"That's not all, manager.  Carmen trusted in you entirely until her moment of death. Everyone else who remained did too. Why do you think I decided to stick with you until the end? Just look around you now. Everyone gathered here just for you. And they’re waiting expectantly."

In other words - and this is why I started with Chesed - it wasn't just that everyone followed Carmen, but that they all trusted in and followed Ayin.

This is important. Very important.

Because Ayin, as stated, is a very unreliable narrator.

Not just because he forces himself to be amnesiac and only regain his memories bit by bit (as we see with the Memory Synchronisation), and again in Keter) but because any and all opinions coming from "Ayin" tend to come from the Keter. The Keter are all fragments of his fractured psyche, versions of him who had failed to suppress the cores of the Sephirot, and therefore were unable to find the realisations that coming to terms with them would bring.

Abel is only able (ha) to think about how he's failed them all, and how they're forgotten. He's repressing every emotion so that he can't feel anything. He doesn't think he can become better. He's just aimlessly living until he can die.

Abram leads a meaningless existence, having forgotten what he's even been doing any of it for. He doesn't have any courage left, because he's just languishing in guilt. He also believes that no one should have trusted him because all they were there for was Carmen and once she was gone everything fell apart because she wasn't there, and he could neither be trusted nor trust anyone.

Adam... looked into the Well and states that he believes that this is exactly what Carmen wanted. Considering that the Well is the human subconscious and Carmen is the Bucket that Binah talks about, I'd say this is an accurate assessment of the situation here... especially when all future instalments and materials go into detail on how Carmen is encouraging people to distort. That's... basically what Adam's following, here.

So - who was speaking during those flashbacks? I'd say it's plausible that it was Abel or Abram, or a mix of the two, with Adam showing up in how none of the dialogue from the A Team really shows A the Manager going "uh, maybe this is a bad idea?" - Adam is the fervent belief in Carmen to the exclusion of rational sense, taken to the logical outcome when one has been placed in the Time Loop.

Because of that I'd say it isn't just the Sephirot in machine forms being stuck in their worst moments - all we see from Ayin is filtered through his depression as someone who has lost everything and is just... moving forward regardless.

But- let's step back, while bearing that in mind. What was it Chesed said, again?

That everyone had trusted in Ayin. That they'd stuck around for him. Yes, they were all joined together to enact Carmen's will, but the fact was, if they didn't trust and believe in Ayin, they wouldn't have carried on together. And Chesed also states that as Daniel, he'd gone to their company because people trusted each other.

Elijah's problem was that she needed praise, to be told that she was doing well. To be told "good job" sometimes. The problem? That Ayin only realised that maybe he needed to do that far too late. But... she did want his attention. She looked up to him.

Michelle is seen being a nervous young girl, older than Lisa and Enoch but younger than any of the others - so, probably mid-teens at most. The main memories with regards to Ayin interacting with her? Him being harsh and stern... because he was concerned about her. The very fact that she did commit suicide after selling them out to the Head goes a long way to show how badly she felt for that, because she clearly cared about them all a lot. Headcanon territory, but I can see Michelle looking back and thinking "Ayin was right" - and knowing that he was trying to look out for her.

Gabriel, we don't even really see before things go wrong, at all, really. We see what his reaction is to Elijah's death. We see him covering up and hiding his emotions behind rules and regulations. But... we also see how Gabriel very easily brought up his ideas of how to prevent such accidents in future; he clearly felt comfortable enough to do so with Ayin at the time.

Giovanni... is one of those special cases who never trusted or liked Ayin and Ayin didn't really give him a reason to. He outright lied to Giovanni - because he wanted him to die happy, at least. But as A and Netzach they're able to talk things out; clearly, because, as Netzach says after the fact: "But for the first time, I think that maybe it was me who called you." It's also very strongly implied that Manager X/A by this point has a complete understanding of where Netzach is coming from, meaning that they're both on the same page about a lot of things. The very fact that Netzach is encouraging A with "I made it this far, what makes you think you can't?" adds a sense of camaraderie.

With Lisa and Enoch, we see that while Enoch suggested that they called Carmen their new mother, and while we don't see them outright say anything about Ayin... he's the one who's always there to bring them back home. Ayin is. And it isn't Ayin that Lisa's furious with in the flashback; that's Carmen. We don't see Lisa blame Ayin, which could be taken to mean that it never directly happened (as I'm sure Ayin would have remembered if it had).

I feel like it's telling that Lisa, the child who was more "easily frightened," says to the Manager, as Tiphereth, "But you're different, you're supposed to be different!" - as in... she trusts in him more than she's trusted in Carmen, or Angela, or any of the other "adult" figures in her life that we've seen.

As for Enoch... during Abram's questioning, we see Tiphereth say this: "One day, I realized that you were also looking towards somewhere with a clear vision, just like he did." In other words, Ayin was much the same as Enoch, waiting for something better, hoping that something good would happen. The line "Where did we want to go while holding a child's hand?" could even suggest that Ayin was there and present as Enoch died.

We've already covered Daniel up there, but yeah. That guy trusted in Ayin and stuck with him to the end. Someone who encourages Ayin to feel like he's capable of pushing on, because Daniel believes in Ayin's abilities.

We don't see many scenes with Ayin and Kali. Not after their first meeting, when she doesn't know or trust him yet and Carmen tells her that he "always glares like that," basically. But we do know that she literally fought to the death with an Arbiter just to keep him and Ben safe and alive. If she didn't think they were worth it, then I'm sure that she'd have given up by that point, or tried to stay alive herself.

Ben is- well- okay yeah, he extolls Ayin's virtues to the point that it's hardly a joke, especially come Ruina, to say that Ben/Hokma is a walking and talking "Have you heard of our lord and saviour Ayin?" - but I think... that's the thing? Ben is the main one who never needed Carmen. It was always Ayin he was there for. The only one on the team who looked up to Ayin as his senior, rather than her. Several of his statements also imply that he knew Ayin well before the project, as well, and he clearly got that admiration from somewhere, for some damn good reason, and not just because he's gay for Ayin. He was fully capable of walking away when he thought that a line had been irreversibly crossed. And the fact that he loves Ayin to the degree that he does is what brought him back, and enabled him to become Hokma at all.

Binah is a... special one. Because as Garion she never cared about him, and as Binah she still doesn't care about him. She does, in fact, hate his guts and have every reason to, because she was tortured. She saw him as the same as her - in a way that possibly filled him with shame, given how much he's shown to care about others!

However, Binah is shown both post-suppression and in the Keter questioning and also in Ruina to explain that what was going on with her was that she had a conscience. She was simply ignoring it. Pushing her feelings and fears aside, so that she didn't have to face the consequences of everything she did. In seeing Manager A (the player) move past her, she wants to see what he can do, because she isn't sure it's possible, and she... wants to see him accomplish his goal. Binah's outlook is very similar to the City in general, actually, since most people can't afford to pay attention to the voice in their heads that's saying "you should stop now, you're crossing a line you shouldn't. Someone's hurting, and that's bad."

This can also be seen in Ruina, where although the main protagonist and pov character is Roland - who, let's be fair, has a biased and bad opinion of Ayin because of him being the one who was in charge of the light, and also what Angela's said - we do get some glimpses every so often.

Malkuth is the first to bring him up - technically Roland himself,

Angela then interrupts the conversation, unable to bear hearing any of the Sephirot bring up Ayin in any sort of positive way, saying that "I wasn't the one using you. It was him; he used all of you just to satisfy himself" and calls Malkuth's attitude "nonsense."

Note the "still" here! The expectation that they would all willingly lay down their lives for this man who is already dead and gone, fighting to protect what he'd done.

In fact, Binah is the only one to side with Angela and even she is not doing it for Angela's sake, but the same reason she decided to stand with Ayin. As in - she decided that no matter what came of Ayin's decisions, she would watch the outcome. She decided that this was merely another consequence of that, so she wanted to see how it'd play out.

Netzach, here:

Outright namedrops his part of the Seed of Light.

Malkuth bringing up the company's tagline - although she's misquoting it, it sure is the one Ayin came up with - saying it's similar to history. (The video cut off her line, but I'd hazard that it's "you have to learn from the past.")

That's not the last we'll see of Angela and the Sephirot clashing.

The next major time is during the Briah meet-up.

Chesed "But, I don't wanna forget those memories [of the past]. Decided to embrace them instead. So did everyone else here." Gebura "He's right. I don't believe that I failed to protect anything. I could save the life of someone who inherited her will."

And not just that, but something I think of as one of the most important Ayin-related quotes of Ruina:

This is when they've talked to Angela, who's snapped herself away in a huff because she wasn't ready to hear what they had to say.

This, to me, says that no matter that all we see in the duration of the Core Suppressions is gameplay and text floating across the screen...

The Manager is talking.

The Manager, A(yin), talks to them, one on one (since all of the other Sephirot and also Angela are asleep during this time), in private, possibly on a private channel, so that they can vent and let things out... but also so that he can say exactly what he needs to say. What they need to hear at that time.

If anything, I'd say that the things Chesed and Gebura say up there is quite possibly them echoing back the things that A(yin) said to them. "You don't have to forget what you've done, as long as you can move forward." "You didn't fail to protect anything at all! Look at me, listen to my voice, I'm right here!"

Funnily enough - though perhaps predictably, since Hokma is Hokma and Binah never actually met Carmen - those two are the only ones who mostly talk about Ayin, not Carmen.

Hokma brings up that it was Ayin's path that he followed:

Note that he doesn't specify that the world Ayin saw was the same as the one Carmen talked about. It could be implied, but Hokma was pretty specific on not following Carmen.

And then there's Binah. With one of the most interesting outlooks on Ayin in the entire game, I think.

I find Binah fascinating. Binah watches. She observes. Up until the final moments of Ruina, with the exception of the fight for the remainder of the Light.

She wants to see what happens next. Whether that meant the direct consequences of what Ayin himself intended to have happen, or the knock-on effects of his decisions as someone who grew past his ability to look away from his conscience telling him that what he was doing was wrong, who could face himself and move forward in spite of the fear... it doesn't matter.

Binah respects the man Ayin became, because of this ability he grew to have, and she follows his will in a similar-yet-different way to Hokma - both of them following Ayin more than Carmen, and both of them wanting to see the world that he would create - which makes sense, since they're both of the same "layer."

And finally... we have Angela herself, and if I went through all of her journey from revering him to growing disillusioned with him to growing to understand him... I'd simply be rehashing all of the timeline of the games from pre-canon to the end of Ruina.

But-

Angela: Then, if I worked hard to have a kind heart... will he look back at me?

Benjamin: ...Probably. Eventually.

And... although it never happens in Lobotomy Corporation...

Angela hears a voice in the light, as she herself is managing it and ensuring that it works this time.

It's Ayin, throwing her entire opinion of him and his view of her into doubt with five words:

"...I'm sorry. And good job."

Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina are both games of unreliable narrators. It only stands to reason that on this, too, there would be bias.

Ayin created Angela in one of the darkest times of his life, while he was still following Carmen's will with blind faith. He created her beautifully - and yet, she isn't a faithful recreation of Carmen. She never would have been, like Benjamin said. But not just because of her personality.

Her appearance is intended to look just as much like Ayin himself. Her hair has Benjamin's paleness, when both Carmen and Ayin had darker tones of brown or black. Ayin's eyes and posture. The ability to think for herself, feel emotions, care for others...

Ayin put a lot of himself into making her, just as Benjamin said, and as Binah states at one point. She's as much his daughter as anything (even if the comparison isn't a perfect 1:1 here due to the circumstances) and... the two "parents" who were involved in her creation? Benjamin didn't see her worth as coming from whether she'd been born human or machine. And as for Ayin...

Ayin created her knowing that he'd have to torture her. To quote the song Answers from FFXIV: "Tell us why, given Life, we are meant to die, helpless in our cries?" - he knew that he was creating her to suffer. He had already seen everyone he knew and loved die horribly, save for Benjamin (who would leave him shortly after). The Ayin of Day 50 says in one of the pop-up messages that he hopes no one has to die or suffer today.

Ayin, even before he built her, couldn't look at Elijah, forced Gabriel into pain and discomfort to be sure that he wasn't infectious, found out that Michelle had committed suicide while on the run from the Head, was the only survivor of the assault on the Outskirts lab, hearing Daniel and many others die painfully. He was able to steel himself to deal with creating Binah, but - he knew that simply seeing the aftermath of what she'd done to Enoch was enough to end Carmen's spark and kill her, so he had to know that if he gave a machine even part of Carmen's heart or mind, this would make said machine suffer.

I honestly don't think that Ayin hated Angela, or that he truly believed that "a machine should only act as a machine." Perhaps this is headcanon territory, but we hear and see him apologise to her, and tell her she's done a good job at a very specific moment - when she's free, and when she's chosen to do the right thing.

He knows at this moment that whatever she's doing, is purely by her own choice. She's outgrown being "just" a machine - so if that was what he truly felt, then wouldn't it stand to reason that he'd be upset or angry at her not staying true to it?

And yet, he doesn't. There's just the same awkward voice that doesn't really know how to people, saying only a few words, but the all-important ones she's wanted all this time.

To summarise a post that became way too long:

Ayin is someone that the games make it easy to dislike, due to the things he does - however, these things are normal in the City, and the major difference between him and the other Wings is that he was willing (as Hokma points out) to commit sins in order to work toward a better world, rather than be satisfied living in the one they were in.

We can see the kind of person that Ayin in through the eyes of the people who know him best, in what they say and don't say, and also what they choose to do, and how they choose to stick by him even long after he's "gone."

Much of what we know about Ayin comes from biased sources, not least himself, but especially Angela. But once you take what they give us and compare and contrast it all against what we see from the others, you can start to make a full, bigger picture of this one single person...

...which, honestly, fits rather well with the entire point of the Tree of Life being about how one is only able to see a person's (God's) true self via the emanations, or various different parts, all of which are named Sephirot.

[jeonscatalyst]

https://www.tumblr.com/jeonscatalyst/760242773222883328/this-all-of-this-and-every-single-bit-of-this?source=share

I do agree with this person's analysis of Jimin and Jungkook personalities, and I also agree that to some extent Jungkook's affection being rarer than Jimin's does make it more special to some fans, but where I disagree is that I don't think that's the main reason why fans seem to put more weight in what Jungkook does than what Jimin does.

Because while some fans will put this much thought on the differences in jikook's personalities, I don't think it's the majority that does. It's kinda of a problem we have actually. If people realised that Jimin and Jungkook are two different people with different ways of showing affection, then we wouldn't have to keep seeing the same stupid takes on their relationship over and over again. It's people expecting jikook to always do to the other the exact same thing the other did to them that causes so much annoying discourse.

But you know what a lot of shipper do love doing? Competing with one another. Competition is one of the main things in every k-pop fandom and sub-fandom, shippers are no exception. And when it comes to jikookers we all know the competition is with taekookers. We're always at each other's throats, let's be honest. And some spend just as much time taking about the rival ship as they do talking about their own ship.

Which leads me to what I believe is the real main reason why both sides (not just jikookers) view Jungkook's actions as more important. It's because he's the in-common person to both ships. He's like the main character in a love triangle. He's the one that ultimately decides who gets together in the end, not the two love interests, so their actions don't matter as much.

The point of contention with shippers has never really been whether or not Jimin or Taehyung like Jungkook, that's already assumed to be the case. With solos it's definitely an argument, but jikookers and taekookers focus more on each other than in solos. No, the real question has always been who does Jungkook like more: Jimin or Taehyung?

If Jimin declares his love for Jungkook jikookers will of course love that, but if Jungkook is the one who does it it'll matter more because it can be used against taekookers. Taekookers don't care if Jimin loves Jungkook or not, what he feels doesn't matter to them. Nothing Jimin says can prove anything to them. The confirmation has to come from Jungkook, that's the only way they'll care about it. And jikookers do care about one-upping taekookers. If we didn't we wouldn't spend so much time trying to prove to them that we're right.

There's been plenty of times when I've seen something that used to not matter suddenly become important the moment people realize it could be used in the shipping competition. It's a sort of 'I didn't care that much about that thing I have until I realized it could make the other side jealous'. Or 'I didn't want that thing until the other side got it and now I want it too'.

Things naturally hold more importance to people when those things have not only their own inherent value but also when they have the added bonus of pissing off someone you don't like. Jimin's love for Jungkook is important by itself but Jungkook's love for Jimin is seen as more important because it will also piss off taekookers.

I'm pretty sure that if the two biggest ships were jikook and vmin instead, then the most important thing suddenly would be Jimin's affection, regardless of how affectionate he is with everyone.

Again, I do agree some fans do consider jikook's differences and that that does influence how they value their actions, it's just that I think there's a bigger reason here.

I hope this didn't come across as me being a contrarian for the sake of it, I just wanted to add a separate perspective on the subject because I've had this opinion for a while and it seemed relevant to the topic. I also hope I was not to harsh on my opinions of other jikookers, but no fandom is without it's flaws and I think it's important to acknowledge them.

Anon, I owe you a cold beer right now because it seems like you read my mind.

This is exactly what I think too. It’s just mostly about the competition, the shipwars, the fights and the need to “win”. That’s really why people think Jungkook’s actions hold more meaning that Vmins. It’s like Jungkook is the prize that Vmin are desperately trying to win and every action or word of his is used as an affirmation or debunking. “Jungkook did this with Tae but didn’t do that with Jimin so Tae is his boyfriend”….just an endless cycle of bullshit.

Anyone who is mature and experienced enough understands that Jimin and Jungkook don’t have to express themselves exactly the same for things to be mutual. Jimin could say “I love you” to Jungkook and Jungkook wouldn’t say it back but would prefer to make a video of Jimin. So many people would say Jungkook didn’t reciprocate just because he didn’t do things exactly the way Jimin did when the truth is that he did, just in his own way.

When I see people coming up with useless takes or comparisons about their bond it pisses me off to no end because it’s the little things that Jungkook does. People would get pissed at Jungkook and say that he doesn’t show love to Jimin as much as Jimin does just because Jimin would constantly touch him, ask him to eat alot and is very vocal about his affection but Jungkook remembering that Jimin likes his food spicy and trying to make it just how Jimin likes it apparently means nothing because Jungkook wasn’t shouting on a roof top or Jungkook thinking of what to cook in Jeju and knowing that Jimin would love it doesn’t matter because he didn’t stand on a podium and announce it or Jungkook quietly getting water for Jimin and giving him to drink without him asking doesn’t mean a thing because he didn’t carry Jimin on his head. Sometimes I don’t even have the energy to argue because if only people understood Jungkook they would know that Jungkook doesn’t treat anyone the same way he does Jimin.

I personally can see how someone might naturally value Jungkook’s actions more because Jimin is a natural caring, nurturing and loving person to everyone so sometimes it is hard to tell if his actions mean more or it is just him being himself but with Jungkook, he tries as much as possible to be impartial but he just cannot help it when it comes to Jimin. He is pretty kind and caring towards everyone he loves too but not the same way Jimin does it plus Jungkook tends to go big when he expresses his affection for Jimin. So with Jimin we get little bits of love and affection more frequently than we get from Jungkook but once we get one from Jungkook, it is usually news worthy and kinda exclusive to Jimin so it hits harder.

I dunno. I might have gone off topic but like I said, I 100% agree with you.

[lurkingshan]

My mind has been spinning and spinning around episodes 3 and 4, and I have so many feelings about them that I have been struggling to decide what I want to write about. One of @bengiyo's questions is about the different feel of this part of the story in the transition from page to screen, including the overall kdramafication effect, and I felt that most keenly where Hyung was concerned.

Let's start with the obvious: Hyung is not supposed to be this young and hot. But then, Young is not supposed to look like Nam Yoon Su, so I guess we can let that one go. More than that, though, I think episode 3 went out of its way to make Yeong Su a more appealing love interest than he ever seemed to be in the novel, and that had a clear purpose: to make the comedown in episode 4 so much worse.

Episode 3 used the familiar trappings of romance dramas to help us understand why Go Yeong was so drawn to this man despite some of his rough edges. They had interesting dates with good conversations. They shared an umbrella in the rain. They kissed sexily outside. They danced together in Yeong Su's (much nicer than described in the book) apartment. I may or may not have actually said OH MY GOD out loud when they were moving together to that old song; it was intoxicating in exactly the way early attraction is. Instead of viewing Hyung through the bitter recollections of Young's memory already knowing he's a bastard, we experienced him the way Go Yeong did when he was first catching his interest, and it was easy to see why he would latch onto this man as a balm and a distraction while he was going through a very hard time with his mother's illness.

Which means it hurt so much worse when Go Yeong emerged from that initial haze in episode 4 and realized who Yeong Su really was. He got a hard look at the deep internalized homophobia Yeong Su was carrying and projecting onto him, and it was not pleasant, nor was the way it echoed across his experiences with his mother.

Another interesting change made in the adaptation was to increase the severity of Hyung's crime; where in the novel he only searched and read articles on the evils of homosexuality, in the show he wrote the damn article while Go Yeong slept in his bed. A much larger betrayal and blow for Young. And this makes sense for the screen version, IMO; the romance is deeper and therefore so must be the fracture. Everything is just a bit bigger and more dramatic to amplify the themes of the story and to help the audience understand why this might drive Go Yeong to such a low moment without the benefit of his internal monologue to connect all the dots.

I was reflecting on these changes and how they affected the tone when I read @solitaryandwandering's thoughts, because I was intrigued by her reception of these episodes as darker, where for me, with the (much) more depressing novel version in my head, they felt lighter than expected. Which is kind of a wild thing to say about a section of the story that includes Young's suicide attempt, but context is everything! The T-aras, of course, also contribute to how different this section feels. In the book, Young is presented as so isolated and alone with this relationship, but in the show he has friends who know and care and try to help and show up for him in his low moment to make sure he is not alone. It makes such a difference to the bleakness of it all, and also makes the story feel more cohesive across the different parts in a way the book intentionally does not.

I think ultimately the adaptation choices made here were smart, and I continue to be impressed with how thoughtful Sang Young Park has been with his different visions for his story in each medium.