#but u should know it was good and i enjoyed it. and restrained myself from making my only comment something

[writinglittlebeasts]

how's working on devil dogs going?

alright! started writing chapter 13 this afternoon when i realized drawing wasnt going to happen. also realized my outline is sparse and weird for this second half so im gonna be winging it pretty much in a way that i wasnt before 🤔🤔🤔🤔 but i believe in myself. i can do it, i can finish devil dogs. and itll probably be easier to dedicate time to it once im not worrying about how im meant to pay rent so much 🤞🤞🤞🤞 two interviews this week somebody give me a fucking job so i can focus more energy on writing about the fucked up home lives of catholic werewolves. ramsey's just been throttled in a major way and now he has to deal with living in the same building as father thompson, surely this will not be a harrowing experience that makes him want to destroy everything 🙂

cat picture thank you for sending an ask xoxo

[sirenofthegreenbanks]

🐝🪳🪰

henlo!! (bops you on the nose) thank you for these great questions! im overflowing with fics i nEED to rec!!!!!!!!!!!!! (i realized all of these fics are longfics and that u may not necessarily enjoy reading those; feel welcome to drop me the same bugs in my inbox and ill do a short version for you <3)

🐝 recommend a fic with great symbolism, or themes, something really clever, or, like. just something you could write a whole literary essay about!!!

there are honestly so many fics i could write a literary essay about so im restraining myself to the first option

within us an orchard by mintyfish (guckindieluft). QY, WOH, pre-canon/canon divergence, wenzhou, tian chuang era, secret garden-esque, grief/mourning, identity shenanigans, injury tending, murder husbands, M. zhou zishu, leader of tianchuang, enlists the mysterious intruder he caught in the middle of stealing into his manor to garden work. while they heal his miserable excuse of an inner courtyard garden, zhou zishu also finds his will to live.

something something nature, grief, intersections:

By month's end, the north-facing branches of the plum tree were as black and twisted as the half-consumed wreckage of a house fire. If he stood on his roof, Zhou Zishu could see the flecks of budding plum trees painted across the city. His might just be slower—but a hard dark certainty had taken up residence in his gut. It wasn't going to bloom. In a week, Zhou Zishu would drive the second nail into his meridians.

Wen Kexing's approving little nods couldn't mask what was surely now obvious to both of them: Zhou Zishu had created a killing jar. Was it really so surprising that everything in it was dying?

But then, the book said—fire. Really, of all the things Zhou Zishu had done in the garden these weeks, treating the plum tree should have been the most familiar: cut down what must be cut down, cauterise what might be saved, and burn out the rot before it could spread. Court factions, families, trees—contain them or kill them, the tools were the same. Whether the tree would survive, the book could not tell him.

🪰 recommend a fic that makes you sad (in the best way!!)! Some great angst and/or hurt/comfort!

ripple by notoneoftheheroes. QY, WOH, pre-canon/canon divergence, wenzhou, alternative version of events, identity shenanigans, happy end, whump, angst, siji manour, M. a trick allows zhou zishu to move his sect back to the jianghu, (almost!) out from under the thump of the crown prince. but his sect, the family of his choosing, gets more and more dissatisfied with the choices zhou zishu makes to maintain that delicate balance and ensure their survival, and things start to tighten around zhou zishu‘s throat. will he lose everyone he loves? zhou zishu is an unreliable narrator in this one, and as things get worse and worse with the sect members he views as his family here, you can watch as each side makes terrible choices that lead them almost to a terrible end.

the two headed dragon by lisbeth_laufeyson. WOH alternative canon universe, childhood friends to lovers, angst, grief/mourning, manipulation, optimistic but open end*, E. out of the shadow, someone wants siji manour ill. things take a turn for the worse when wen kexing himself, one of the two leaders of tianchuang, gets fatally wounded and almost dies. over the course of his long coma, zhou zishu is vulnerable and falls into dark waters while trying to save his sect. this fic really examines zhou zishu‘s potential for committing atrocities, caused by his desire to do good and stoked by someone he trusts but shouldnt. you know who is behind it, thats not a spoiler, but they dont, and it hangs over the story like a dark cloud. this fic comes with a major character death tag! as with the last chapter that is not up to date anymore! there is a sequel! *important edit for clarification: its a bad ending! the only thing that could inspire u to be optimistic about it is that the person u think is dead turns out to not be dead!

🪳 recommend a great AU!

in a city sorrow built by wearealltalesintheend. WOH pre/canon divergence/alternative universe, family of choice, grief/mourning, fluff, T. the ghost valley is no place for a child, and thus wen kexing grows up on top of a mountain with an old monster, a goofy swordsmith, and a grieving old lady. yet, he clutches that glooming coal of rage and sorrow close to his chest, and decades later his revenge unfolds. i loved this so much for how it changes basically everything about wen kexing‘s backstory, and thus creates this alternative universe in which wen kexing Has It Better, but manages to examine how in the end it only marginally makes an impact on his desire for revenge and chaos. i loved the different faces of mourning and grief and how here, even more people join the collection of loved ones wen kexing loses. only now he truly isnt alone in his grief and he‘s arguably better emotionally prepared for it. this is a wip!

bug me for fic recs!!!!! do it!!!!!!!!

[hymnsofheresy]

hi!! i hope you are doing well and staying safe!! :-) ok, this is gonna bit long, i’m sorry!!! i been thinking a lot much about how for black americans, christianity is embedded in our history whether we want it to be or not. from the very beginning, when the Word was used by white people to justify slavery to when that Word was taken and used as hope, to when churches, pastors/church officers and hymns were used as symbols and catalyst of the civil rights movement. its so insane to me to think about how black americans relationship with Jesus is so intimately connected to our race and history and centuries of oppression and grief, and how for white people its… not. like, my sister says sometimes when she doubts her faith she remembers our ancestors during slavery, how they remained faithful despite their unfathomable suffering, and how she owes it to them and their faithfulness to continue. i go to a predominantly white liberal christian uni and as a black person i am always, always feeling out of place. the sermons, the worship nights; i enjoy and am so grateful for them on a certain level but i also feel so disconnected because i know myself nor my faith are truly understood, or often even recognized in white spaces. i guess for me and many black americans, my identity, experience in this life, and feelings as a christian and a black person cannot be separated- how can it, when black american history and christianity have been intertwined for so long. the history of black american christians is often a history of an intimate relationship with centuries of shared grief and trauma, faith, blackness, and white supremacy.

we had a conversation in class about faith and race in one my classes, and i mentioned how restrained i feel in white churches bc its so… silent. black baptist churches often have people screaming and shaking and running around when they “catch the spirit” as we call it. they are overwhelmed with their faith, with the Holy Spirit, with Jesus’ love. and its so freeing, and so recognizing of how many centuries it took Black people to get where we are, how many centuries we suffered and how He remained faithful.

idk!! i just think its so interesting and somewhat heartbreaking. i dont want their to be a disconnect, i want to feel unified when going to sermons in predominantly white churches, or reading this blog or other christian focused blogs ran by white persons, and in general in white spaces! but theres so often a lack of recognition and conversation of what it means to be black and christian in america (and what it means to be a poc in general, since for most poc religion and race are inseparable), and how that differs than white christianity. i would love to study theology but like most higher education fields, that area of study is often heavily white, and i cant talk about my faith without talking about my race, and inadvertently, white supremacy.

its just so frusterating and sad and i know all in all comes down to ending white supremacy, including dismantling it in our religious spaces and conversations. i know you’re white so your perspective on this will be limited, but i wanted to ask for the thoughts of someone who studies religion and who’s conversations i often sincerely value!! thank u for taking the time to read this!!!!! have a good day!!!! be safe <33 :-)

My apologies for taking a while to answer this; this ask has been on my mind for a while. My perspective is definitely limited, but I think that you should definitely deeply consider studying theology. I am not going to discourage you from attending any seminary or divinity school that you might have in mind; but there are black seminaries in the United States that are extremely well renowned. No matter what seminary you might attend, there are usually classes offered at most protestant seminaries that cover the intersections between race and religion. I certainly recommend looking into divinity schools and seminaries that offer classes pertaining to black and liberation theology. You clearly have a keen awareness of race within Christianity, and I think that you have the potential to be a wonderful theologian.

The relationship between race and religion isn't exactly subtle, walking into a black church is vastly different from walking into a white church. I don't necessarily think these differences are bad per-say, I think they reflect a different historical and cultural experience from each other. What does bother me is the superiority complex that is prevalent in white churches; and I will admit that I have been conditioned to think this way. This is especially so in more "high-church" spaces, which is primarily the spaces I occupy. This sort of thinking is most certainly rooted in white supremacy.

There are certainly some fairly successful integrated churches, however the worship style typically leans more "white" or "black;" I haven't really come across a church that have successfully combined both types of worship together seamlessly.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with feeling this "disconnect" you describe. You are certainly not alone in your experiences; I have come across many people who have described very similar experiences to you upon entering into white churches. Of course, I am not being burdened with the extra layer of systemic racism, but I also feel a disconnect when entering into black churches.

I genuinely believe this reaction is normal. This sort of disconnect, to me, is just a form of culture shock. What seems to help me a bit is just recognizing that simple fact. I might not fully understand what is going on and I might be a bit uncomfortable... but that is okay. My embodied worship does not have to perfectly reflect someone else's. The God we love is still the same, even though we have different ways of expressing that love.

Overall, black theology and spirituality is profoundly important to the Church as a whole. It is something that white people within the church need to start recognizing.

[buckyownsmylife]

t r e a c h e r o u s - chapter iv

The one where you are Sebastian’s girlfriend, but Chris can’t get enough of you. 

Due to the age gap between you and Sebastian, your boyfriend has a hard time feeling sexually attracted to you. In order to save your relationship, he invites Chris to have sex with you while he watches, hoping that the voyeurism will awaken his arousal and jealousy. Soon, he’ll learn that inviting his best friend into his relationship may have just been the worst mistake he ever made, when Chris finds himself unable to let you go after his role is done.

for general warnings, author’s notes and disclaimer, please go to the fic’s masterlist

Chris’ P.O.V.

       “Chris,” she let out, clearly surprised to see me at her doorstep in the middle of the night. My heart thundered in my chest at the sight of her, her hair a bit disheveled but still falling down her back in perfect curves, stopping just before that incredible ass I couldn’t stop thinking about. She shuffled her weight from one foot to another before breaking the silence. “Sebastian isn’t here,” she explained, to which I nodded.        “I know,” I smiled, enjoying how a blush traveled across her face as she realized I had come here for her.        “What do you want?” She asked, a bit breathlessly. I licked my lips, unable to tear my eyes away from hers.        “Isn’t it obvious?” A pause, no response. Her chest heaved under the thin nightgown she was wearing. “I want you, Y/N,” I finally admitted, watching her mouth fall open as my words reached her.        “Chris…” She started, already taking a step back inside the house, as I took up the opportunity to step inside, closing the door behind me.        “Hear me out,” I begged, capturing her hands and pulling her to me. She tried to avert her gaze, staring at anything other than me, until I carefully fixed a curl that danced in front of her eyes, depositing it behind one of her ears. “One night, please. That’s all I’m asking for. I…. Fuck, I just need you. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that night. I haven’t been able to fuck anyone else, to be completely honest. I just need you. One last time. Please.”        That was the whole speech I had and I was fully prepared for her to scream at me, throw me out of her house and never speak to me again, but her eyes pierced me with something that reminded me so much of the feeling I was trying to control inside of me and before I could second guess this, she nodded once.        “Okay,” she whispered, barely audible, and my lips connected to hers.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

       Our first kiss took all the strength I was trying to use to still restrain myself from this vile act I had just accepted to partake in. But now that it had left me, with weak knees and barely supported by Chris, who now had one of his arms around my waist, all I could think about was him and how his mouth tasted like beer and how sweet his movements were.        Of course, I knew he was a sweet man, having had the pleasure to become friends with him a while ago. But it was very different to be receiving his sweetness under this situation, one I never thought I would get to experience.        The night we shared under Sebastian’s watch was nothing more than pure lust, and I was expecting this to be no different, but he… he was treating me with such care. Like I was the most precious thing he had ever had the pleasure to hold.        We were still kissing as we made our way through the house until we reached the bedroom. In fact, we never stopped kissing. Any time I tried to pull back to gather some air into my lungs, Chris would pull me back to him again, like he was afraid I was going to say something to stop this.        I didn’t want to stop this.        Suddenly, my nightgown was being pulled over my head and I was standing naked in front of my boyfriend’s best friend. Again. Only everything was so much different from last time.        For starters, I didn’t remember him looking at me like that. Not like I was the most precious thing he had ever seen, some sort of rare artwork he couldn’t believe he had right before his eyes. His hands slowly caressed me from my hips to my breasts and he took his time. He pinched and he rolled my nipples between his fingers and before long I was gasping and he was pushing me down into the mattress, climbing up on top of me right after he took off his own clothes.        And then I felt him, hard and heavy against the inside of my thigh and just that simple contact had me moaning from underneath him.        “I know, baby. I know.” Every word was followed by his lips against my skin, kissing, licking, tugging, just hard enough to elicit a gasp, but never enough to leave a bruise. We both knew we couldn’t. “I’m gonna take my time with you, alright? Gonna do this the right way, now.”        He didn’t offer me a chance to answer, his mouth engulfed my nipple and I cried out loud at the feeling of his tongue swirling around it. He sucked on it enthusiastically, and I was already writhing with desire. When he finally released it with a pop, his attention went immediately to the other one, but his fingers came up to continue playing with the nipple he had released. Between the pulling and the licking, I was dripping and he hadn’t even touched me properly yet.        I was just about to beg for him to get on with it when he finally seemed to take pity on me.

Chris’ P.O.V.

       After I had satisfied my need to suck on her sweet nipples, I started my slow descent on her body with wet, open-mouthed kisses, wanting to make sure I didn’t leave one single inch of skin untasted. I wanted to memorize her sweetness, the way she intoxicated my tongue and my thoughts.        When I finally reached my destination, she was trembling with desire, just how I’d dreamed I would be able to leave her. I smiled when our eyes met just as I stuck out my tongue to touch her outer lips, barely teasing her.        “Chris, please…” She whispered into the night, and immediately all of my restraint was gone. Hearing my name leave her like a prayer was more than I had ever hoped for.        I buried my face in her pussy like she was the last meal I would ever get to eat.        God, as much as I loved to eat women out, nothing could compare to this, to her, to her taste. I already knew I would only be able to stop licking her when overpleasured tears were coming out of her eyes and she was begging me to stop. Then, and only then, would I force my cock into her.        Her juices were already overflowing from her pussy when I wrapped my lips on her little clit. She screamed out, half in surprise and a half in pleasure, and I was so proud of myself for being able to elicit this type of reaction from her.        She was fucking delicious. Sweet and overpowering and I licked her furiously, determined not to waste a single drop of her essence. When she came for the first time, I felt like I was the one who was going to pass out, from having all of that liquid thrust into me.        I welcomed it happily. Then I pushed a single finger into her, my movements quick and precise as I felt around for her special spot. When she squirmed, trying to escape my touch, I knew I had found it.        “What’s wrong, baby girl?” I teased her, separating my lips from her just enough so that I could talk, but keeping my finger moving inside of her. “Didn’t know about this, did you? I bet no one had ever taken their time to look for it, but I’m here now, sweetheart. I’ll take care of you.”        When I sucked her clit this time around she cried out, quickly cumming again, and I had to groan at the feeling of her walls clenching around my single digit. I didn’t mind that by now my face was completely drenched in her release, I would bathe on it if I could. But knowing how she felt squeezing a part of me made me desperately want to have my cock inside of her again, soon.        However, the part of me that wanted to take advantage of this night together was still stronger. So, instead of separating myself completely from her, I pushed another finger in, opting to give her little clit some rest this time around. I kissed my way back up to her face, forcing my tongue past her lips so that she could have a taste of her own arousal.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

       “Don’t you taste good, sweetheart?” He asked, in that voice that was pure sin. I felt like I was drowning in desire and I couldn’t remember why I should feel bad about this, not when it was giving me such pleasure. His fingers quickly brought me to another release, or maybe it was the same, just stronger, and I was thankful there was no one around to hear my screams. I never thought I was very vocal in bed, but I guess that no one simply had been able to bring that out in me.        Chris did.        He looked so pleased with himself when I was finally able to open my eyes again. To be honest, I would be too, if I knew I could give this much pleasure to someone. But I guess this was my chance to prove myself not only to me but to him, too. So as soon as I could gather enough strength, I managed to push him back on the bed, changing our positions so that I was the one hovering above him, between his stretched out legs.        “Can I taste you, daddy?” I asked, looking up at him from underneath my eyelashes as I softly ran my fingers over the bulge in his boxers. Chris let out a groan at my words, biting his lip as he adjusted himself so his hands would be behind his head.        “I fucking knew you weren’t that sweet little innocent angel you pretended to be. Go on then, baby girl. I’ve been dying to feel your lips around me ever since we met.” The confession brought a new wave of wetness to my pussy, and I eagerly climbed up his body to kiss him once before taking off his remaining piece of clothing.        Despite his words, he didn’t seem to want to let me go. Every time I pulled away from his lips, he’d grab me by the back of my neck to kiss me again. Finally, I pushed away from him, keeping my hand over his chest to force him to remain lying down while I giggled.        “Do you want me to suck you off or not?” I teased, running a single finger over his plump lower lip before taking my eyes off of it to find the darkness that had taken over his staring back at me. He groaned like the decision gave him physical pain, but ended up releasing my hips and relaxing back against the mattress.        “Fine, princess. Get on with it, then.” Despite the relatively harsh words, there wasn’t any roughness to his tone. In fact, he looked at me like I was in fact a princess, something rare and beautiful that he couldn’t wait to treasure, and as much as I wanted to ignore it, my heart melted at the sight.        I distracted myself from the emotional response he caused me by moving along with what I intended to do. Despite the little time I had dedicated towards it last time, I remembered Chris’ cock vividly, and my mouth watered just by the memories. So it wasn’t much of a surprise that as soon as it was freed from its confines, in all its pinky, girthy beauty, I immediately licked the head, relishing in the taste of the few drops of precum already there, as well as in the loud moan that immediately escaped the man’s lips.        God, he was beautiful. And at least for tonight, he was all mine. I’d cherish every single second where I could taste his skin, explore his muscles, feel his lips on mine. I’d worry about the consequences tomorrow.        Making sure to keep my mind focused on this moment, I sucked on the head of his cock before slowly pushing more of it into my mouth. The sounds that he was emitting only served to make me wetter, to incentive my own movements on his member. I wanted to make him break. I wanted to taste his cum, to have it filling my mouth until it dripped from my closed lips.        So I pushed forward, sucking and swallowing around him when I had his cock deep inside my throat. The broken moans that Chris let out made it all worth it, every drop of sweat and tear that traveled down my body. His hands had found their way around my hair, and although he didn’t use it to guide my movements, it still made me feel hot like nothing else.        But when he did use his grip to pull me up, forcing me to release his hard cock, I whimpered at just how satisfactory that tiny bit of pain felt, while at the same time whining because he had separated me from my new obsession.        “I don’t want to stop,” I protested, ready to fight my way down his body again, but he only laughed, mocking me. Fuck why did this arouse me so much? I tried to rub my thighs together to alleviate some of the need that was already rising in me again, but of course, Chris caught on to that.

Chris’ P.O.V.

       I pulled her to my lips again, making sure to sit her on my lap so her warmness was pressing right over my throbbing cock. “I know you don’t want to stop, baby. I know you want to keep on sucking me until I cum deep inside your throat, but guess what?” I raised her only enough so I could get my member inside of her, grunting as I felt her tightness engulf me. “I’m gonna cum deep inside this pussy tonight.”        She only moaned loudly at my words, clawing at my chest as she struggled to find something to hold as I fucked up into her while pulling her back to me, manhandling her as if she were nothing but a doll, a toy for me to use.        “Fuck, your fucking pussy…” I could barely believe I was here, inside of her again. Only this time, it was so much more intense. There was no Sebastian to worry about. There was no condom to keep me from feeling exactly how wet and warm she was.        For a split second, the thought that I could get her pregnant flashed in my mind, but it was gone as quickly as it came. She must be on the pill now that she and Sebastian are official, right? At least, that’s what I used to ignore the fact that I didn’t want her to be.        “Chris, fuck, this fucking dick…” She whined, tears spilling out from between her closed eyelids as I continued to pound her. A warm feeling of satisfaction took over me, and I raised myself to my forearms before fully sitting, keeping her moving up and down my cock through my grip on her hips once more.        “You like it, baby? You like feeling me deep inside of you?” Her moans were music to my ears, especially since I’d spent so much time imagining them after fucking her for the first time. Just the little breathless gasps that she allowed herself to release then weren’t enough.        And I had the distinct feeling that fucking her would never be enough either, even after this unrestrained experience. I wanted to own her completely. The longer I spent inside of her, the clearer it was in my mind: I wanted what Sebastian had.        God, I wanted what Sebastian had.        “I’m gonna fuck you so hard you’ll forget you ever even met Sebastian.” She cried out when I pulled out until only the head of my cock was wrapped by her lower lips, only to forcefully push my way inside again.        “If you were mine, I’d never leave you empty. You’d be filled with my cock all day, every day, even after you begged me to stop fucking you. I’d just leave you here, warming me up, keeping me ready for when you were begging to be ruined again.” There was absolutely no filter to my words anymore. All I knew was me and her and this need to fuck her so well, she’d never forget how it felt to have me inside of her.        “Fuck, you’re so deep inside of me,” Y/N moaned, and it only spurred me on, watching her rub her lower belly, where she could feel me hitting from the inside. The sight of her hand over her stomach was too arousing and I lost control of my thrusts, but I had no idea why.        “I love being inside of you,” I confessed as I pulled out to make sure I wouldn’t cum that instant, instead manhandling her body until she was on her stomach, her ass pressed up at my member.        “Do you want to fuck me like this?” She asked, getting on our fours before turning around to meet my eyes from over her shoulder, and my cock throbbed just from the pure sin of the view before me. There were no words to describe how it felt to know that this was how Y/N behaved in bed, in her most vulnerable state. It felt even better to know that I was the one who had put her in that situation.        “Fuck yes,” I agreed, rubbing the head of my cock between her sensitive lips before slamming home, one of my hands making sure to wrap around her hair to pull her back against me. “I love doggy.”        The view of her ass bouncing as it hit my thighs prompted me to slap her right cheek, which in turn, made her gasp. “Me too,” she managed to get out, and for whatever reason, the confession only turned me on even further.        “Tell me more, tell me what else you like,” I begged, desperate to keep hearing her speak, to know what sort of filth goes through her mind, just so I could make this moment more real, feel like I owned her at least a little bit more than the actual truth.         “I like having your cock in my mouth.” The use of the present tense got to me way more than it should. I opened my mouth to beg her to shut up now, but before I could, she kept speaking, making me moan out loud instead as I gave myself over to this sinful pleasure. “I like feeling you stretch me open, it feels like you’re splitting me with this fucking cock. I’d let you.”        Those last words came out as a whine, exactly as I felt her pussy milking me dry. My orgasm was so intense, that I found myself admitting in the throes of pleasure, “Fuck,  I wish you were mine.” I kept thrusting, albeit slower, just to make sure that every last bit of my cum had gotten inside of her.         The idea that there was a slight possibility of breeding her was enough to keep my dick from softening. “I still want you,” she claimed, her hands pulling me to lie down in the bed beside her before she climbed up my body, our witnesses dripping on my chest. “I want more.”        “Me too, baby. Me too.”

[han-shinsuke]

m o s s i n m y h e a d

Y U T A O K K O T S U

🔞🔞⚠️⚠️ SMUT

heads up; corruption, family stroke 😂 charr

icon: https://pin.it/2GlfuUV

•••

I had some drinks downstairs. The elders offered so, I accepted those. It was my second time chugging down two bottles of alcohol and I must say it affected my system pretty well. I feel dizzy and all I want right now is to enjoy my bed. I excuse myself and make my way out of the small party in our garden. I pass by through another table occupied by my cousins. They offered a shot but I took them down. I am not a drunkard so yeah, shot rejected. On my way to the glass door, I bumped into a pot that almost sent me flying inside.

“Hey, careful.” The man speaks, holding me tightly on my limbs, “let’s get you settled.” I let out an ‘oh!’ It was Yuta. The foster child of my uncle. From my forearm, his left hand crawls down to my palm and intertwines his fingers with mine as he drags me slow to my bedroom upstairs.

“Can I have a taste of heaven, Y/N?” I may be drunk a little but I heard him clearly. Slowly, he pulls me in his arms as soon as the door closes. “My head is on fire. Both.” Chuckle follows.

“I’m your cousin, Yuta.” My timbre was not convincing. I search for his eyes and when we met, he immediately lowered his head and smooched my lips hard, “on papers but by blood, no connection was established.” His lips pops when he released mine.

“I’m a virgin, Yuta. I cannot guarantee your satisfaction.” I distance myself from him. It’s just the alcohol that made him feel needy, “I know someone who can put out the fire in you. I can phone her for you.” I should have not feel this way. I fish out the phone from my pocket and started dialling my friend’s number. She has a crush on him. They would make a good couple.

“Don’t push me to someone, Y/N.” He says through gritted teeth. My phone disappears from my hand and it crashes againsts the wall. Yuta just broke my phone! “I’ll teach you a trick, babe, okay? We can work you out of your cave, yeah?”

“I’m not tasty.” My sight is far. Staring completely at nowhere. Mind blank. Yuta sits me on the bed and he kneels in front. “I don’t taste good, Yuta.” A tear escapes my eye. What am I crying for?

Yuta was fast. He kisses my tears to stop.

“We will find out about that, babe. I’m gonna remove your short and this thin cover, okay?” He talked softly so, I just nodded.

I rise from the bed. Giving Yuta the time he needed. My denim short was pulled out of my legs but my underwear remains on my knees. Yuta pushes me back on the bed, spreading my legs and peeking over the flesh that lies in between my thighs. He looks at me with sparks of hunger in his eyes and I swear, I never felt so sexy under a man’s stare my whole life.

“We have to be quiet, babe. Can you hold your cute voice down?” Again, I just nodded.

Yuta sits besides me, anchoring my one leg over his thick one. The huge man held my eyes captive as if that was a some kind of ritual in luring me in his charms. I was too focused on his bright ones that I have chosen to disregard his words. “I’m gonna touch you now, babe.” He spits on his fingertips before moving down to the part of me that aches to be touched by a man.

“Yu–Yuta...” My voice was low when I breathed in his name. His touch was warm and his two digits were thick. When he pushes a finger down to the slit, I find myself gripping the hem of my knitted sweater that rest above my thighs. “Tell me if it hurts you.” He pushes again, feeling the bud through his calloused middle.

“N–No... but your touch feels sharp.” And warm. I breathe in again his name with a long soft moan when he doubled the presence between my folds. “Hmm... Yuta..” The fingers rubs up, pressing down the clitx with gentle pressure. Unknowingly, my legs shut closed and as well as my orbs.

It hadn’t been long since my last actions but Yuta was fired enough to hit my knees to separate them and captures my glistening eyes, “stay still.” He licks his lips then continue pressing my bud. The pressure he was putting on it has increases. “Yuta...” I squeal from the abruptness of his fingers. It suddenly moves down, pressuring my tight core with the heavy push. My chest moves up and down, chasing the air that escaped my lungs.

I can feel my cheeks heating up with the way Yuta watches my face whenever I make a sound. “Open your mouth, babe.” There was strictness in his tune so I obliged. Parting my lips as I struggle to breathe. Yuta leans down to my face, ghosting my lips. “I wanna fill your mouth with my cum fuck.” He hisses, rolling out his tongue to my mouth then flicking it against the gum wall. I swear. I fucking swear, I could tell his actions are for testing how I would taste in his. And there it comes, the kiss only a real man could give. “Fuck it.” The curse before the heavenly kiss.

My hands holds onto him when his kiss gets rougher and deeper. His fingers that have been playing with my flesh also gets meaner. He rubs my clitx fast while kissing me so deep that it feels like he was ready to devour my whole mouth.

My legs shakes as well as my lips, “Yuta~ ooh God~” his fingers were getting deeper into my cunt and fuck, I snatch his hand from my folds and cry, “It hurts!” His nails grazed my walls! Yuta stops mid air from kissing my lips again. “It hurts, Yuta.” I repeated.

“I’m sorry, babe!” His expression softened. Yuta touches my cheeks and kisses them softly.

When the pain subsided, Yuta kissed his way down to my neck. Tracing each corners with soft and wet kisses before sucking the skin where he thinks his marks would look better.

“Yuta...” I guess that’s all I can do. Moan his name as he nips the skin to bruise it beautifully. There must have four of them placed on my neck for him to smile sheepishly. “I feel bad for causing you pain, babe.”

“I still have to stretch your core. Bear with me, hmm?” He pecks on my lips and then rolls out my sweater up to my neck before latching his mouth on the two erected buds that makes my body jolts. Not only his fingers were sharp against my skin but also his tongue. It burns the spot his tongue touches. Yuta has to restrain my body inside his arms to minimize the movements I am creating every time his lips pops and sucks my nipplesx.

I don’t recognize the person writhing underneath him. How could a mouth bring out a different version of me? The thought was terrifying.

“Please, Yu–Yuta...” The swirl was rough and abrupt. It made me arched my body and rubbed my naked womanhood against his crotch. He moans, milking a bud, “fuck, babe~ don’t be like that hahnnggg!” I rub my cunt again, holding onto his hair tightly.

“I need you, Yuta!” It ain’t that loud but Yuta was forced to cover my mouth with his hand before feasting over my chest again. “Hmmpppfff~” I shed tears with the continues flicking of his tongue on my chest. The need to cry his name was arising.

Let me moan, Yuta. Let me, please.

I put my hands on his face and try to push him. He tugs a bud and chuckles as he releases my mouth. I gasp for air hungrily. It’s what I need this time. ”You okay, babe?” Yuta asks, drawing circles on my abdomen that clearly has a massive need of air.

“You said you would stretch me, Yuta.” I try moving away from his cage-like position on top of me but he catches my legs and fold them to my chest. “Hold your legs up, babe.”

Yuta undresses himself in a very, very, seductive way that makes me gulp a lump. That was quite a show, I must say. For the second time, Yuta spits... directly on my gaping hole. I savor the warmth of his saliva down there by closing my eyes and licking my lips.

“Fuck me now, sir...”

“We’ll get there, babe but first, stretching.”

I have no idea on how he would do it so, I stay still like a good girl and let him do the work. First, I feel the tip of his two bent digits nudging my tightness, knocking softly, pressing softly against the wall. Secondly, something inside me was opening up with the continues nudging and pressing of the walls as if the nuscles down was making a path for his fingers and lastly, it was embarrassing but by just having Yuta’s fingers stretching my cunt, I find myself dripping wet of my partial orgasm.

“I feel so good hmm... Yuta, please... ”

I heard him chuckle and just like that, Yuta takes control of my legs, wrapping it tightly around his waist. “Yuta hmp!” His next move scares me. He also wrapped his hand around my neck as if he was choking me.

“Moan quietly, babe, do you understand?”

“Yesss~ Oohh gosh, Yutaa hmmm~”

He points his tip and without a warning, pushes it all the way down to my very end. It went smoothly and it stings but the pain was bearable and at the same time, Yuta has a big and long cockx that was enough to make me full and shaking from his upcoming assaults.

My mouth has formed an ‘O’ and definitely my other mouth, too.

“See, babe, it feels good, yeah?” Ah, shit. I touch my belly and shit! His cockx head is carved perfectly inside me for it to make my stomach swells.

“Yuta, oohh God!” He really does not give a warning. His fingers tightened around my neck and for hell’s sake, Yuta pulled halfway then slammed deeper.

“God, babe! Your tightness excites me shit!” He pulls again only to slam harder and deeper.

My core is clamping his length and so my hands on his arm that holding my head down on the bed.

“Yuta... Yuta...” I am currently in a delirious state with all the pull and push as heavy as the weight of the man pounding on top of me.

“Tighten your legs, babe~ I’m gonna ride this fucking cunt to hell!”

And Yuta really did. He rammed himself fully and devilishly into me. Not missing the essential spot to properly stimulate satisfaction with every fast pulls and sickening pushes that drives me to the edge.

“I’m gonna breed you so damn good, babe. Just moan and take it all you fucking virgin.”

No. No. No. I try stopping him from unloading his juice balls deep into my cunt but Yuta knows better how to incapacitated a woman....

Cover her mouth...

Choke her while throwing heavy strikes into her tight cunt...

And most importantly,

flood her pussyx with warm juice.

Breeding complete.

••••

salamat sa maglalabas ng mga saloobin nila 😂

[ginazmemeoir]

so i was inspired by @h00man-bean and here you go with a fic about Kaz and Inej as the Devil and the Reaper.

tagging @h00man-bean @mango-pickle @carmen-riddle @the-fault-in-our-inquilab @momo-all-the-way @gopikanyari @aadyeah @reddish-green-personality @weird-u @holding-infinity-and-a-book @dragonfairy1231 @totallyforgotyouwerehere @a-dragon-under-the-stars @taareginn

I crash into consciousness. The sound of gurgling water and rustling leaves greets me as I stand up. Strange. The last time I was alive, I had arthritis and was confined to a wheelchair. All Nina could do was slow mine and Inej’s death. I remember the last breath I drew, the last thought I had, the last time I saw Inej smile. And then nothing. Just an empty void, just – not being anymore.

I look at myself, flex my toes. It appears as if death has returned my old skin back to me, but it still doesn’t look like mine. This one is clear as if it was tended to by a Grisha tailor daily, as if the man who bore it had never worked a day. I am wearing the suit I stole from Pekka Rollins, decorated with a genuine gold pin showing a crow with a lion’s head in its claws. My cane lies beside me along with my hat. Either I am in a coma and am dying a slow, painful death as many of my enemies wished, or I have woken from a dream and nothing that I know happened, never really happened. I would rather prefer the first. Then, I see Inej.

She stands there in her captain’s uniform, the teal coat Sturmhond gave her, coupled with breeches and boots. I bet her knives are still tucked there. Her skin, still the same gleaming bronze, is now wrinkle free. Her eyes are kohl rimmed, and her ink black hair spill onto her shoulders. She looks at me with confusion, her eyes searching. “Kaz?” she asks. I move toward her, and then run. Funny how a good leg is almost as useful as a grisha crafted cane.

I clasp her hands in mine, her breath caressing me. “Inej,” I whisper “What are we doing here?”

“You’re both dead actually.” says a voice behind me. I turn around to see a Fjerdan merchant approaching us. He wears a blood red coat with gold lapels. His blonde hair is slicked back, and he walks with the cool confidence of someone who just cracked a deal. The only thing differentiating him from a Kerch businessman that I once looted is that he’s surrounded by floating rocks. Inej immediately kneels beside me, and nudges me. “Sorry but I have a bad leg. Also I don’t bow to animated turkeys.” I say as I go and retrieve my cane and hat. The Fjerdan chuckles and replies in heavily accented Kerch, “I suspect that bad leg excuse is of any use to now, Kaz Brekker. Also, please get up Inej, you look extremely out of place bowing to me in a teal coat.” Inej gets up reluctantly, and when she does, she has… tears in her eyes?

“Sankt Demyan of the Rime, thank you for protecting me.” She says, and hands him one of her knives. “Ah. How poetic.” He says, and pockets the knife. That is when I realize that we, in fact are dead. And Inej’s saints, are in fact, real. Great. There goes my ten thousand kruge. Thankfully the rest of the Crows aren’t here or I would have ended up as quite literally, a bankrupt soul.

“How many times have I told you Demyan to let me welcome the visitors? You’re hardly a gracious host, let alone a good gambler,” says a Shu woman, as she walks in behind Demyan, along with a Suli girl. The Suli girl was surrounded by floating rocks as well. She looked at Inej, and smiled at her. “And now, I would like those gold buttons of yours.” Says the Shu woman.

Inej hastened to remove her own lapel, a dragon and a fox, when the woman stops her. “I’m not talking to you Wraith, I’m talking to Demyan. We had bet that Kaz Brekker would kick him in the balls when he first arrived. I however had gone for a scathing insult. So seems like I won.” She says, and takes the gold buttons that Demyan removed (albeit while grumbling) in her slender hands. “Sankta Yeryin of the Mill, and Sankta Marya of the Rock, I- it’s an honour to meet you.” says Inej, and proceeds to bow more times than she has apologized when she was alive. I am shocked to see the way these so called “saints” milk Inej’s “devotion”. She was the closest thing to a saint that people actually had down in the mortal realm, and I would rather have kicked Demyan in the balls than let Inej bow again. But I restrain myself for the sake of my jaan.

Inej gives two more knives to the women, and stands beside me. She looks like a ridiculous schoolgirl, all giddy as if she had met her favourite aunts, and I catch myself falling in love with her all over again as a dead soul. Demyan soon interrupts my thoughts with that sinuous high-pitched voice, and asks, “I see you’re unusually quite today Dirtyhands. What’s the matter?” “I’m sorry, it’s just I’m wrapping my head around the concept of not existing physically anymore. Also I’ve heard you carry your belongings with you to the afterlife, so where’s all my gold?” I reply. Yeryin chuckles, her slit eyes crinkling while Marya looks at me in disbelief. Her voice, booming like a mountain echo, repeats what she, and countless others back in the mortal world, including my wife, thought each day, “Have you no honour Kaz Brekker?” I just shrug and adjust my hat.

“Anyways, ah, back to the topic at hand.” says Demyan, as he walks towards a tree. No wait, the tree. It could easily be as tall as a mountain. Five springs gush forth from its roots, and a heart is suspended from thorns right in front of a tear in it. The heart with the thorns I remember from the most epic heist of my career, involving legends and the Ravkan monarchy. The tree I do not. Inej asks, “Mind me, O great Saint of the Dead, but could you please acquaint us with our surroundings?” Wow. That’s a lot of vocabulary from a woman whose last sentence, in my memories, is complaining how the medicine she gave me smelled like rat fart. “Oh yup that��s Djel. Or rather his ash tree. Quite popular with my countryfolk.” he says cheerfully. “And we’re here in a mountain in the Sikurzoi, in a different plane of existence. For you, are dead.” he continues, with that ridiculous smile of his. Marya then steps forward, her voice slightly less enthusiastic, giving me the feel that this is all probably quite rehearsed for a while now. “You are a long way from home my loves. Kaz Brekker, you died a natural death. Inej Ghafa, you also died a natural death. Both of you were a hundred and thirteen years old, with Inej dying within a year of your death. The form you have now, is the form you chose to be remembered as.” she says. Yeryin huffs past us, her robes billowing, and hands the buttons over to Demyan, raising up her hand to his face and showing a symbol that quite contradicts with the Saint of Hospitality. “I should have expected such from you, you merchant scum.” she says. She then turns to directly address us and says, “Enough introductions though. The real reason you’ve been brought here is for another reason entirely. You see, the souls of the dead…”

I roll my eyes as the Sankta prepares for another lecture about how our “feeble human brains can’t comprehend the world.” I regret having married Inej in this moment in the afterlife though. Dirtyhands would’ve conned them by now and found a way back to the mortal realm. Kaz Brekker on the other hand, sits on the grass like a five-year old listening a story. Inej sits beside me, her coat now lying beside her in a heap and her hair fluttering open. How I wish I could’ve seen her in the open sea like that.

“…are usually brought to the other sides of the tree.” Yeryin says, waving her hands in an elegant motion to summon up a throne made out of the river pebbles and rocks, confirming that the trio were all, in fact, Fabrikators. “There, they are all assessed in context with their deeds on earth. Everything that they’ve gone through, and everything they’ve done is all taken into account by the Saint of The Book.” She then points to a woman, invisible until this point, sitting near the tree. She bends over a desk, poring over a giant ledger and surrounded by thick books. Her thick blonde hair covered her face, her glasses perched on her wide nose, and her fair, plump skin flushed. “The three of us then decide their fate in the afterlife. Those, who we decide are ‘good’, enjoy the fruits of paradise for a while and then return to the making at the heart of this world. Those, who we deem ‘bad’, are impaled on the thorn wood until they are purged of their sins. They then bathe in one of Djel’s springs, and return back to merzost.”

“Yeah but why are you telling us all of this? We get it, we’re dead, so which way are we going?” I ask the Saints. Inej elbows me once again, scolding me with her eyes. I shrug, and stand up with my cane. “Unless you have something else to tell us, I would like to take your leave. Saints.” I start to walk, when I find myself tripping over. I right myself with my cane just in time, and see that my hands and feet are bound by vines, Demyan’s hands raised up. These saints want a taste of Dirtyhands? Fine. I will show them Dirtyhands.

I see Kaz’s demeanour change. He slips into the familiar garb of Dirtyhands, his eyes cold as flint, lips slightly pursed, standing like the King of the Barrel. I get into a fighting stance, my heavy coat no longer obstructing me. I feel the presence of my remaining knives, regretting handing over the rest. I respect my Saints, but nobody, and I repeat nobody, touches my husband and escapes alive.

Marya stands immovable, her eyes gazing at something in the distance. Yeryin clasps her hands, and states, “You came here at our wish Kaz Brekker. You leave with our wish as well. No need to reach for your knives Wraith they won’t serve you here.” I feel a tug inside me, as if someone is yanking on my leash. Before I know, I am pulled back, my breath knocked out of me, and I crash into a wooden chair. Kaz suffers a similar fate beside me, and I can see his anger barely in check. “Why are you doing this to us?” I ask Marya. She glances at me, her eyes tearful, and replies, “Because we’re tired Inej Ghafa. Because you’re now, the new gods of death.”

Great. We’re the subject of a cruel joke by the Saints and are being tortured for our sins. “We don’t want anything to do with you or your jobs. Just release us and march us over to the thorn wood, I’m ready to answer for my crimes.” “Oh you silly girl, we won’t kill our scapegoats, will we? Isn’t that right my fellow sisters?” Demyan says in his ridiculously cheerful manner. That smile takes me back to the West Stave, Heleen bartering over me with the slavers, her sinuous smile each time I resisted her. I eventually did track my slavers, although only Kaz knows of their fate, for he was the one who insisted on having them. Demyan then comes over to us, and the Saint of Death’s face becomes morose. He kneels in front of us, as if pleading with us, and says, “You see, we’re linked directly with humans and grisha. Death. Hospitality. Pathfinder. Our roles were fundamental to the balance of the world, to the smooth passage of souls and justice in the afterlife. However, seeing the Starless One return back to merzost, seeing Juris merge with the Dragonqueen, has made us realize that we thought impossible, was actually just – improbable. You would certainly know about that, wouldn’t you Dirtyhands?” Demyan glances at Kaz, his eyes moist, while Kaz looks at him unflinchingly. Weren’t the Saints destined to perform their duties? Then why are they looking for scapegoats? Demyan comes back to me, his tone rushed as he blurted out his plan. “We long to be free Inej Ghafa. We too long to return back from where we came. We too long to feel.” Yeryin and Marya then float over to us. “A Saint that dispenses justice, must have suffered injustice to be accurate in his judgements. He should be immovable, yet sensitive to the souls he receives. Kaz Brekker, you have shown us the resilience and fury of a Saint.” Yeryin says. Marya then glances at me, and begins, “Jaan, you’re one of my own people, and so I hold a special place for you. The Saint that is the Reaper, who brings over the souls of the dead, must kill without remorse. Must feel for each soul with all of her heart. She must be indiscriminate in her search.” “And you Inej Ghafa have shown us that heart.” Demyan finishes, clasping my hand. “The part is yours, should you keep it. However, remember, you must take it up with free will, for handling the deceased is a far more tedious and draining task than it sounds.”

I look back at Kaz. His eyes are focussed on the ground, his brain coming up with another wild scheme. I look at the Saints with disbelief. All this time, as I, as millions, prayed to them, honouring their martyrdoms with festivals and prayers, the Saints just longed to be human. Kaz finally speaks after what feels like an eternity. “I have a question. Are the Saints willing to answer that?” “But of course. That is the least we can do for you.” says Yeryin.

“You might’ve come across two souls in your eternal career. Jordie, and Pekka Rollins. What fate awaited them?” I ask hesitantly. I am both excited and afraid of the answer the saints hold for me. Marya looks at the Saint of the Book. She rises, and comes towards us, a small register in her hands. She hands it to Marya, and returns back, giving me a not-so subtle side look. Marya searches for the names I asked, clears her throat, and begins. “Pekka Rollins, the leader of the Dimes, a gang in the streets of Ketterdam, was impaled on the thorn wood. He was purged of all his sins, and then chose to return back to merzost. As for Jordie, your brother, he did not choose to stay for long.” I look back at Marya. “His soul… was tormented. Even though he was healed with the waters of Djel, even though we helped his soul discover his unknown gift as a Grisha Tidemaker, he kept searching this garden for you. In the end, he chose to take a single bite of Djel’s fruit, and returned back to merzost, finally at peace.”

Jordie’s fate stuns me into silence. Pekka Rollins snatched our life on Earth, but even in the gardens of paradise my brother kept searching for me. My vision blurs, my brother’s destiny opening a well of sadness in me, his peaceful return to merzost the only respite offered to him. This was the place where Jordie’s soul searched for me. Where he waited and waited for me, until he dissolved back into the heart of the world. And this is where I would choose to stay for eternity, the only place that holds my brother’s peace. I look at Marya, and nod.

Beside me, Inej grasps my hand, and smiles. She then looks down at Demyan, and says, “We will take up the mantel of your duties, O Revered Saints.” I roll my eyes. It’s as if Sturmhond’s vocabulary worms it’s way into Inej’s brain each time she talks to her saints.

The saints all look at each other, then smile and open their arms. “Our powers, are then yours, Wraith and Dirtyhands.” Golden rays, the colour of sundried wheat and barley emit from Yeryin. Ink black waves surge from Demyan while a shower of dirt erupts from Marya. The three slowly disappear, probably to a much better place. The knives Inej gave to them clatter on the ground.

Inej picks up her coat, dusts it off, and shrugs it on. She picks up her knives, touching them to her forehead, and wipes them on her sleeve. “So what do we now?” she asks me. “Well we’re here for eternity, alone, at least till you go off to bring our souls. Let’s have some fun.” I say and suggestively smirk. The Saint of the Book widens her eyes in horror as she looks at us. “Oh keep it in your pants, you perv.” I say, as I give a big shout and run towards the gentle slope along the riverbank, Inej’s soft padded boots following me, as we both tumble into each other and hurtle to the earth.

[gayathreya]

an ode to maara/bommi

[soorarai pottru spoilers]

so i’ve watched it and i LOOOVE it, easily in my top elite list of fav suriya films. there’re many things i love about it; maara’s persona and characterisation, his relationships with the people around him, the suffocating elitist atmosphere of the film, the music, visuals,

but my mind keeps coming back to this specific relationship and it’s my fav aspect of the movie. one that i’m not alone in echoing cos i’ve seen maaany people say likewise. i’d like to gush about them.

maara and bommi were just.. SOOO GOOD together???? i have a very small list of suriya romances i actually care about onscreen and this easily skyrocketed up. cos most of the time, it’s either i really like the heroine but the romance in the film isn’t that great/gets little scope (e.g. ngk, where i like sai pallavi but come on their marriage was trash cos ngk is a trash cheating and manipulative fuckboi, or anushka in singam, which is fine i guess but the third film soured me on all the characters), or it’s a case of me really loving the romance itself but i’m not having loads of feelings about whoever is paired up with him (e.g. ayutha ezhuthu, which is an all time favourite suriya romance highlight on screen and it was fantastic, but esha deol’s character was not at all a standout character on her own even if i enjoyed watching them together).

so there’re many a times the problem for me where either the romance doesn’t work, or the woman opposite him is not fleshed out enough. in comes soorarai pottru and i was DELIGHTED with their individual characterisations and their relationship dynamic cos finally here u have a romance depicted on screen where they’re both essentially treated as equals by the narrative even if the story is naturally centred on maara completely because the film is about him.

bommi is her own person and it’s established immediately the moment they meet, which is the exact reason why maara falls for her in the first place despite her roasting him all the time and after that too. she stands on her own, doesn’t need ~a man~ to help elevate her or achieve what she sets out to do. and she does all this without the help of the protagonist. her character is not dependent on maara in the slightest. she’s easily more successful than maara for the entire film until the end, and her personality isn’t overshadowed by her husband cos she pretty much has her own shit to run and holds her own opposite him. even when maara initially gets his dream off the ground, bommi isn’t relegated to a lower bar within the context of the film where her only role is to support him, but she works at expanding her own business/franchise and meets maara as a respectable equal in his venture as a food vendor, which even maara is surprised by but pleased about. she outright meets him in their shared field of interests and expertise, and maara never once treats her any less or jokes about her proposal.

and of course whenever they came together..... i gotta say, it was pretty hot lol. their emotional scenes had A LOT of weight. their physical scenes were certainly sexy and hot i could def watch them kick it up a notch. i don’t really find suriya has much chemistry with many of the heroines he’s paired up with but somehow he seemed comfortable with aparna enough to do loads of sexy staring, gazing, looking sexual, etc, and actually looked good playing a character who was not just in love with his wife, but who also was physically attracted to her, which is what completely sells the relationship and makes it look organic on screen. it helped that the visuals/lyrics depict him as more submissive in their love too (i thought both veyyon silli and kaattu payale had pretty obvious more sub vibes on behalf of the man, or the more serious bit where he comes back home exhausted and seeks comfort), it really works very well. i adored their scenes and it always works for me when suriya plays more subby characters in his romance because....... because. interests. *coughs* he is Good Boi (tm). he is Sub (tm). plus the physicality of maara/bommi shown is not only sexual, but they had softer moments too which made it all the more endearing. more than once, maara hugs her for solace or when he’s distressed and it’s very sweet and gentle, or the little quick scenes where he puts his hand on bommi’s head. those were all very cute moments and stays with u even though it’s short. it was a lovely sight to see in films where your usual hero/heroine barely even touch each other, or when they do, have no vibes or connect at all, while the physicality here is both sexual and also paired with emotional influence.

the only thing i really had an issue with is the lack of a proper resolution or dialogue after their big fight. i know some people have pointed out the fight itself was not something they liked because he hit her, but i didn’t have an problem with that tbh. it was a natural progression of maara’s character as he was steadily failing repeatedly, getting steadily angrier as he struggled to control it, and thinking she called him a loser was the snap. it worked quite well imo because the narrative also establishes pretty fast he regrets what he did and he immediately goes to look for her, finds her gone, and spends the next how many hours searching everywhere while looking very upset. so i don’t view it as a glorification or justification of his action since we are shown he knows he fucked up. but that being said, it was never mouthed explicitly. i felt their reunion was too quick and too easy and i would’ve liked an explicit line from bommi calling him out on that, and maara explicitly apologising for it and saying openly he messed up big time with her. that was the only part about the relationship i was disappointed by and i wish it was worked in better cos i don’t require a whole conversation or exposition dump, but even a few extra lines would have been nice in the scene he finds her again and runs to once again seek wordless comfort and apology.

>>> ETA: HE DOES NOT HIT HER. i’m adding this lil para here cos i’m uncomf with how many notes this post got spreading this misinfo i wrote myself which i’m wrong about. my first watch i did not catch it and thought nothing of it, but then i saw people saying he did and was talking about it and when i rewatched it, i agreed. but now, after multiple watches, i want to note i’m back to my initial instinct, which is that he doesn’t. maara pushes her by her chin/throat, and he then smacks the plate of food bommi has hard. it’s obvious when u pay attention to the speed and angle the plate flies off to the left, as well as the sound of the metal clang. the only explanation is maara slapping that away and not bommi flinging it. i do urge people to not continue spreading it without fact checking at least, considering sudha in an interview herself had a convo with someone and she agreed with the use of the word ‘’restrained’’ in how maara reacted during the fight, which wouldn’t make sense if he outright slapped her. this also makes it in character for bommi, who doesn’t seem to be the type of person in the narrative who would have just taken that with no fall out after.

SO YEAH despite this one thing, i really, reeeeally loved this relationship and romance and individual characterisations that had their own journey and arc but also were tied down to the same path that they don’t drift away within the frame of their movie and their own goals. this was a married couple shown right with individual personalities and ambitions, and not a woman who was fused to the hero of the movie and only there to meet the commercial requirement of a love track in a film. plus of course uhhh they were really hot together. i’ve mentioned that, right.

cos they were hot

and they should have made out for me

and i would have liked to witness more of them being any kind of physical since suriya and aparna were really nice to look at. O_O

[80s-roger]

Not On My Watch - part one

pairing: dad!roger x mum!reader (mid80s)

note: R/N means random name, there will be part 2 sooooon. thank u for being patient and still being with me. i love u all and i’ll say again how much i missed yall. i have a dialogue prompt link in my bio if u have any requests!

summary: you’re divorced with queen’s roger taylor due to constant cheating and irrational behaviour towards you. but u have one person in common: your daughter, Laura aka your favourite human on earth. Your marriage with roger had its ups and downs but laura was the happiness in it. Now that she’s 8 and starts to realise how your terms with roger are, you finally tell her that you’re seeing another man except her father and she took it really warmly. She seemed excited to meet the new man unlikely your ex husband who accidentally learns about it by Laura, the weekend you would leave her at his place: on weekends you had some cute getaways with R/N because the court decided that Laura could stay or visit her dad on weekends and stay with him for five days each Christmas and easter vacations. On summers he has the right to be with her for two weeks.

warnings: angst from both sides

words: 2,290

masterlist // dialogue prompts

“Laura, are you ready?” You asked her as you were wearing your coat.

“Yes mum, I’m getting my backpack!” She answered from her room.

“Alright babe, your dad’s waiting for you!” You cringed at the last words; dad. You ended it on bad terms, but laura had nothing to do with it.

“I’m ready!” She ran through your place fully excited to spend her weekend with Roger. You kissed her before going at the parking, to get your car; that one Roger bought you for Christmas.

You shook your head trying to forget some explicit memories from you two in this car and started the engine, going to Roger’s house. It was a mansion compared to your ordinary flat. Maybe Laura would be happier with him, who knows.. Her attitude’s different when she’s with him like they’re best friends.

“Did you get all your stuff?” You asked her as you were reaching his home, just one turn and you reached the destination.

“Oh no.” She whispered at herself while checking her backpack.

“What is it, love?” You asked concerned.

“Mum, would you mind going back to get my pyjamas? I don’t have my pair here..” she looked sad.

“Of course, I’ll let you go to your dad’s now and I’ll come back in a quarter with your pyjamas. I won’t be late.” You smiled at her and dropped her by his door. “Let me help you carry the backpack.” You offered but she politely refused.

“Dad! Open up, I’m here!” Laura shouted when knocking his white front door.

You tried to keep yourself together when the door was about to open in any second. And there he is, wearing his daily comfy clothes and still looking hot on those. Yes, you were always in love with him, but in the end he wasn’t. Too much cheating while on tour made you extremely mad. You had a dignity to save and a child.

“Hello my little baby girl!” He leaned down to hug Laura. Their hug was long-lasting, they didn’t see each other since the previous weekend. “How is my blonde little angel?” He asked her with a smile on his face, he hasn’t looked at you yet, he’s really focused on his child and you don’t blame him.

“I missed you!” She said between their hug, to his ear while her arms crossed his neck and his hands rubbed her back.

“I missed you too! We are going to have a really good time! Uncle Fred will visit us tomorrow, he can’t wait to see you!” He kept that bright smile of his on his lips and so did she. But her smile got bigger at the second Roger said uncle Fred who happens to be her godfather too.

“I missed uncle Fred. How are his cats?” She laughed because she enjoys playing with them at Garden Lodge.

“I guess they’re fine?” He giggled. “Come on in, don’t stand here.” He kissed her and they both walked in and you were standing there like an asshole watching him ignoring your existence for about five minutes.

“Yeah. You have to take these too, huh? I brought your kid here, a thank you is appreciated.” You said annoyed stretching your hand with two bags towards him.

“Thank you, enjoy your weekend.” He had that selfish ego towards you, you would kill him right away. The choices you have made after the divorce looked right for your happiness. This man would ruin your state of mind if you lived under the same roof.

“I will, that’s for sure.” You winked. “I’ll just have to come back again to bring Laura’s pyjamas. Too pity you don’t have a pair of hers, while your closet must be full of forgotten thongs and cropped tops.” You mocked him right into his face and he was standing there watching you humiliating him.

“I thought we are no longer married, right?” He ironically asked. “Why so jealous?” He let out a crooked smiled.

“Fortunately we are not. And I don’t give a shit about you anymore.” Your ego was talking, you do give five shits about him. “But I don’t want my kid exposed to the fabrics your whores’ wear.” You angrily defended yourself and got back to your car but Roger continued the beef.

“Neither do I want my kid around new men. She needs only one father figure.” He was legit serious while defending himself.

“Is there another joke on its way because I have to leave. It was a good one though.” You ironically replied and left, leaving him unable to call you out.

Roger went inside his home, watching his only daughter fixing her stuff in the living room.

“Laura, will your mum leave this weekend?” He asked trying to catch bait.

“She leaves every time she brings me here.” She seemed unbothered.

“Where’s she going on weekends?” He would die in any second if he didn’t know what you’re doing on weekends and with who.

“She goes on road trips with R/N!” She raved and Roger’s inner Leo awakened.

“Hold on a second, babe.” He took her stuff away from the table to talk with her about it. Laura seemed like she screwed up. “Who’s R/N? Have you met him?” He asked on a serious tone.

“N- no. But she told me we are having dinner with him on Tuesday!” She was thrilled at the idea and Roger was on the edge of insanity. “Mum looks so happy when she talks about him, I’m very happy for her.” She smiled at her dad, having no idea what was coming next.

“Do you know anything else? Won’t you tell papa?” He smiled at her trying to fish her for good.

“She said she would leave right after leaving me here. She made her luggage for the weekend too.” She grabbed her stuff at her arms. “Can I go to my room now?” She politely asked.

“Of course, you can. I’ll let you know when food is ready. Oh and close the door at your room if you want to feel like you’re on your own.” He kissed her forehead and Roger was sitting at the couch, really thoughtful and confused. Laura obeyed his request and so did she closed the door. She didn’t know that her father would start an argument with you. He couldn’t deal with the fact you date another man beside him. That’s so selfish of him, isn’t it?

You came again at his place with the pair of Laura’s pyjamas, unaware of what was coming next. Seeing Roger every time he picks Laura or the opposite you get nothing but heartache and need to cry because you have been heartbroken for years. It took you a lot to stand on your feet again. Roger surprisingly, opened the door before waiting for you to knock. He seemed furious towards you and really nervous. Maybe he couldn’t handle the words he was about to throw.

“Uh, here are Laura’s pyjamas and a pair of clean clothes, guess you don’t have many or any.” You rolled your eyes.

“I bought these clothes.” He checked them by opening the bag.

“Yeah, I know, I just don’t want them in my house, they should stay here and be worn when she stays with you.” you arrogantly crossed your arms.

“Okay, that’s enough.” Flames were popping out of his eyes and he angrily placed his hand at the door’s side.

“Yes, you’re right. I gotta go.” You attempted to turn around but his hand prevented you from it. “What the hell, keep your hands off me.” You tried to get his hand off you. But he wouldn’t resist. “Roger!” You yelled.

“Who’s R/N?” He asked with so much jealousy on his voice.

“What’s it to you?” You bitterly answered trying to put his hand down from you.

“Tell me, or I’m not putting my hand down from your arm.” His raspy voice got shrill. You got scared of him for the first time.

“That’s none of your business Roger! You don’t have the right to invade in my personal life!” You defended yourself physically and emotionally.

“It is my business as long as Laura knows about him. Tell me, who’s he?” He demanded.

“I’d rather keep this for myself.” You toned up your teeth and so did Roger with your arm. “Stop it, you’re hurting me!” You yelled again and now he pulled you aggressively inside his home’s hall.

“Fine! Now that I don’t clasp your arm, you can talk.” He had his hands on his waist waiting for you to speak.

“You don’t have to know who R/N is. I didn’t have to know the names of all the groupies you have slept with.” It’s a fact. And he didn’t seem to bother.

“No, I have to know. No one’s allowed to sleep with you.” Oh God, this man has such a nerve.

“Excuse me? Are you serious?” You opened your mouth in shock, being unable to believe what he just said. “Am I your property or something?” you asked.

“No you’re my wife and my daughter must not meet that asshole. I will not let that diner happen.” He really pushes his luck.

“Firstly, I am not your wife, we divorced a couple of years ago. Secondly, watch your language, this man treats me better than you did all this time so you’re the asshole. Thirdly, you’re forcing me to get restraining orders against you.” You warned him and now he seemed less aggressive than before.

“That man is nothing but trouble between our family!” He is so mad that you date a man after so many years. It was him all the time. But at him, you were one of the plenty.

“We’re not a family! You ruined it. You ruined my happiness and now? You won’t let me date a man? Why? We are not married anymore! Unlikely you, you didn’t seem to bother while I was waiting for you to come home after touring. You were constantly doing it, with no regrets!” You shouted but he tried to lower your tone by pushing you to the wall so Laura wouldn’t hear any angry tone. Your tears would run any moment but you had to stay strong. You’re a strong woman, all this time you were strong. Roger was speechless. He knew you were right. But he’s selfish and so are you.

“You can’t present another man to Laura! She’s a child! At least I was doing it on secret!” His face was approaching yours, so the tone would be lower. He is doing it every time when he wants to take control. You couldn’t stop looking into his blue eyes. It’s like a trick of his, whenever you fight.

“You were secretly doing it because you didn’t want me to know. Not because of Laura. Now, stop looking me this way.” Your voice was smoother and your eyes stopped staring Roger’s. You would melt at any second.

“Have you had sex with him?” He asked with no signs of guilt or embarrassment.

“What the hell, my life’s nothing to do with you anymore. You don’t have to know.” Your eyes were back at his again. His warm breath hitting your face, his lips coming closer to your nose and slowly rubbing that area.

“I’m sure you don’t feel the same way whenever you have sex with him. It’ll always gonna be me.” He teased your skin with his nose, going to your ear, your cheek, your nose and later his lips against yours. Sending shivers all over your body, with his hands wrapping your waist and his legs covering yours.

“You do think a kiss of yours would change my mind?” You arrogantly asked, interrupting the hot moment.

“No, I’m just reminding you what we did. And how it ends up.” He smirked with his palms now on your cheeks.

“I don’t want to remember. You bring me pain and I don’t want it. I’ve had enough of this shit.” You said back trying to put him down.

“So you’re leaving me now for that guy?” He asked defeated. Okay.

“You were leaving me for other women, years and years. You always had the excuse I’m on tour but I do miss you. This is what I was settling for. Do you think I would feel guilty for falling in love with a man who’s not you?” The last sentence hit him right to the feelings. He was speechless. You opened the door again, leaving to meet your new partner at the train station. But you didn’t finish. “You’re right though. I don’t feel the same way when I’m with him. I feel better. I feel appreciated and loved.” You stepped out but before closing the door you said one last thing.

“If you’re curious, sex is better with him. Not that I have many experiences, but I think I can compare between two men.” You smiled, hiding the pain. You lied. Nothing feels like Roger. He hurt you, he mistreated you but you can’t lose feelings for him. You love him but you don’t want to revive the days before divorce. And now you left, started the engine and vanished from the neighbourhood. Crying and missing Roger. But R/N is just a distraction. He’s a good company, but there’s not the passion you used to share with your ex-husband.

“I fucked it up again.” Roger said to himself hitting his head with his hands. “I won’t let her be with him. She doesn’t love him.” He knew you really well. He was missing most of the times, but he knew you. He could read your thoughts.

[fodderstompferz]

hello people of andy lostnite fandom :o) i have found a very cool post made by @lesbianrobin about st4 predictions ! i wanted to just rebolg with the original but of course now i wanna explain some of my choices ... but thank you for making the tier list i mean it ! this was so much fun :o) read my predictions below 👇

1. definitely not happening

- i do think many of the new characters are going to die, but not any ones that we've gotten a lot of coverage on (save for chrissy and the few jocks). rip prematurely to chrissy and levon hawke man

2. unlikely

- steve is NOT going to die because i think and i hope and i plead that the writers know that his arc is too good to die

- ok i put BOTH ronance besties/enemies in unlikely because i dont think that the plotline will lead to either please hear me here: we know from st3 that theres a general indifference/disregard between the two. basically the arc will teach them that you can be able to accomplish things/build respect with a completely different person that you may have misjudged before. but u know.. just me :o)

3. unlikely but i wish

- currently unclear on the duffers willingness to make more characters gay ...... but yeah they should thats just how its shaping to be why stop it???

- i feel like with all the major stuff thats going on here (plus st's innateness to the 80s) i feel like time travel would be taking on just too much but wouldnt it be cool u know ?

4. likely

- ok i really believe that kali deserves a second chance, not in the sense of a redemption but just a second chance to get a little bit more time so its not super rushed since she basically got only an entire hour to . like . exist rly . not asking for a lot of time but just enough to get some substance :o)

- look im not gonna go super into why dustin might die this season bc its intricate and its probably been said elsewhere but the short of it is that dustin has been major enough to earn himself a lot of love ! but is also not major enough to be a central fixture of the overall trajectory of the show

5. definitely happening

- its no secret that we're getting a lot of hopper content this time around ... hes not a favorite of mine but i would be interested in learning a lil about his backstory i think !

- (we'll be meeting more 'numbers') SERIOUSLY call me insane do it right now but when we get 'ashe' multi season role you'll know .... plus this is pure brain stuff but wouldnt it be so cool to have a shapeshifter character ? why yes i do have an entire arc laid out no this is not the place ❤️

WOW i had to restrain myself in order to not talk abt all of them i just rly rly love the show and i hope u enjoyed my lil though abt them !! feel free to give feedback anytime !!!

[chanswavyhair]

i learned to love (pt.2) | seo changbin

a/n: i ended up writing this bc i felt too upsetti doing a sad ending JSHSJS sorry:’) anyways, i hope u enjoy uwu. stream streetlight folks!!

word count: 1.8k

genres: angst, fluff

part 1 | [m.list]

it’s been a long night. you sighed, lying in your bed. you were listening to red velvet’s i just on loop, while surfing the internet. suddenly, the idea of checking changbin’s sns crossed your mind, as it’s been days since you last checked. you tried to control yourself, but your fingers were already typing his usser.

to your surprise, you saw that he had produced another –probably amazing– song. you immediately clicked on the link, and closed your eyes as you listened carefully the lyrics.

“even a fool knows this, you’re the best thing I've got” wow, first verse and it already hit really hard. you tried to make a promise to yourself, and not to cry if it seemed like he already fell for someone else. even if it’s been three months now since you left.

“i should've hurried, it's too late to regret it now” to be honest, those three months were really significant. you finally got to understand yourself, what did you want to do, and even learned to love yourself more. but somehow, you still missed his love, no matter how hard you tried, you didn’t seem to get interested in anyone else.

“i should've let go of my foolish pride then, i’m only regretting now for missing out the chance” tears started to fall by then. as much as it hurt, you wanted to believe that maybe, just maybe, he would think about you as much as you did about him. well, he didn’t have a reason since it was you whobroke up with him and suddenly disappeared, but you couldn’t help but hope the lyrics were about you.

“how could I ever let you go?” that was exactly what you’ve been thinking for the last three months. yes, you did break up with him, but you still loved him as you’ve ever loved anyone. your relationship came to a dead point, and you had to put it out, even though you hated yourself because of it.

one more night, you cried silently until you’d fall asleep; regretting to ever let all of this happen.

for changbin, things were really, really weird. just like you, at first he thought that even if it was a shame, you two couldn’t have done anything about it. but eventually, he realized that he missed you so bad. he came to think that he got used to having you by his side, which made him start to take less care about your relationship. but he loved you, and he didn’t get why didn’t you let him have a chance to talk to you. well, to be honest, he didn’t try that much and tried to accept it at the beginning, but he was slowly going crazy. so he wrote a song, hoping you would listen it, and at least know, that he still loved you so, so much.

a month after on track came out, you still listened to it on daily basis, and most of the nights, you played it before you went to bed. it was kind of masochistic, reminding yourself everyday of changbin not wanting to let someone go. but you had a life, in which you would study to get your preschooler teacher title – as the high school teacher title wasn’t valid. and in the afternoon you worked at a small café. you were still young, so you didn’t worry about studying again a lot.

it was a quiet afternoon, not many people at the café, which meant you could study while it was empty. just half an hour before closing, the door was opened, probably the fourth or fith client in the last hour.

“welcome to streetlight café, how can i- oh” your eyes went wide open as you realized it was the seo changbin who stood in front of you. he seemed quite surprised as well.

“uh, if you’re not comfortable i can leave-” he said awkwardly. you immediately shook your head.

“please don’t-, i mean, i can keep it professional” what a liar, you thought. he nodded at your words.

“then, can i have a espresso without milk, please?” you nodded trying to ide your smile, because you still remembered his favorite coffee. while preparing it, you realized you haven’t felt your heart race like this in such a long time. as you finished, you took it to where he was sitting. he didn’t say anything but right when you were about to return to your place, he spoke.

“are you busy?” changbin asked. you were internally in chaos, but so he was.

“well... you’re the only here right now.” you said nervously. he made a motion, telling you to sit in front of him. you didn’t rush, not wanting to seem desperate.

“how have you been doing?” he asked, looking at his coffee as if moving the spoon again and again was the most interesting thing ever.

“to be honest... could’ve been better. i am studying to get the preschooler teacher title, and i’m living with a friend from my hometown who is studying here in seoul, too. i guess she was more fun before.” you joked a bit, before mumbling, “what about you?” you tried to avoid his eyes once you finished talking.

“i’m still living at the apartment. i’ve produced many songs, and even took up rapping, turns out i am pretty good. but things are weird, because everything’s right, but i’ve been feeling complicated for some time now.” he said. he made himself look at you, before causually saying, “i haven’t dated anyone since you left, by the way.” changbin hoped you either did.

“me neither, i’m really busy studying and working to meet new people. also, i didn’t feel like doing it.” you said. he didn’t say anything for the next minutes, he just drank his coffee, and you stared at him.

“i’m sorry i made you feel unloved.” he stated, once he finished the hot drink. he surprised himself, looking for your eyes.

“changbin... i think we both did. and it’s understandable because we were both so busy and stressed. i mean, it did hurt, but i could never blame it just on you for being unhappy.” you said, with your heart on your hands. he was clearly collecting his thoughts, until he left out a soft laugh.

“if you think about it, maybe fate wanted us to meet here, don’t you think? what i mean is... if it’s okay for you, we could try to be friends again... i miss you.” your heart fluttered at his words, but you didn’t let it show.

“i guess we can try to be friends again, but i don’t want to rush.” you said. nonetheless, your heart wanted to be home with him again, while your rational part just didn’t want to go through letting go of him again. you smiled softly, ignoring your thoughts. “i missed you too, changbin.”

since that evening at the café, you two officially came to terms with each other, and ineither of you spelt that night out of excitement. he kept his words, and didn’t make any moves on you, just let things flow. it was kinda painful for him, to see you eventually more often, but not being able to kiss you, or to hug you – unless you did it first or he really needed to.

months went by, and you two became really close again, and although it felt different – a good type of different – from when you two started dating, you couldn’t help but fall even harder for him, wondering why did you ever let go of him. when you two started talking, you thought it would help you get over him, but it obviously had the opposite effect.

for changbin, even if he said he was happy to be friends with you again, he eventually let his feelings become obvious. he knew you knew, but he didn’t really mind it, because you were too good to leave him hanging from a string, so you would tell him if you weren’t feeling something too. he just didn’t want to pressure you, even if he half jokingly reminded you from time to time that you could sleep at his (and formerly yours) place; but it just didn’t felt right for you – after all, you used to live there with him and you were already confused enough.

half a year had passed, when you found yourself in his couch, almost cuddling him, watching a boring program you weren’t even watching. it was getting late, you usually left his place by the time, but that night, it felt so wrong to do it. you’ve contained yourself way too many times, but that night you just didn’t want to. you wanted to let things flow, and whatever it should happen, it would.

“it’s getting late, do you want me to walk you home?” he offered, looking at you. you stared at him, wondering if you should tell him your thoughts.

“changbin.” you said, doubting a last time.

“hmm?” he looked at you lovingly, while his deep voice let you know that he would be there for you, whatever you had to say. you then became confident on your decision.

“can i sleep over? is that okay for you.” you said, and his eyes suddenly widened.

“wait, are you for real?” he asked.

“i wouldn’t joke about it.” you answered.

“but... you are aware of my feelings for you, aren’t you? i’m not sure if i... will be able to restrain myself if we spend the night together, y/n.” he said. he felt ashamed to speak up about his feelings, even if you already knew.

“changbin, i’m not a little girl anymore. i am very conscious of your feelings, so just... don’t. you don’t have to restrain yourself.” he looked at you, getting closer. was this finally happening?

“y/n, before i do... i need to let you know. i love a lot, i don’t think i’ve ever stopped. i hated myself when i lost you, and i stopped when i found you again. if i focus on any part of you, your hands, your lips, your legs... i remember what i was to feel them against my skin and want to feel them again. but more than that, i ask myself how can love them all. so, if you are sure about this, ask me to kiss you and i will, but if you’re not, don’t do this. because i don’t know if i’ll ever love again.” he said, centimeters from your face, holding it with his hands, while you were now holding his heart.

“i’m afraid to hurt you so bad again you don’t love again, but you know i’ve always been selfish, and i’m even more afraid of you not loving me anymore. it’s crazy, how i can keep falling for you again and again. we are too young to love like this, but i would never regret it, just don’t ever let me down. so if you are willing not to do it, please... kiss me, changbin.”

[isolavirtuosa]

U-Turn

[fanfiction] NaruSasu

Started out as a short story exploring Reason #837 why Naruto and Sasuke didn’t get together in canon, Naruto is STRAIGHT!, but then it became this.

U-Turn

Isola Virtuosa

 - 10 -

  I didn’t even know that they had reached a verdict in Sasuke’s trial when I opened my door to find him standing there.

“But… how…?” I trailed off, staring at what must have been a mirage.

“They released me,” he said with a shrug.

I felt my mouth fall open, but no words came out.

“Can I come in?” he asked irritably.

“I, uh, yeah, of course, of course,” I said, standing aside.

He pushed past me, kicking off his shoes and making a beeline for the living room.  He closed the curtains with a harsh tug, his eyes stuck in a seemingly permanent squint.  I had fought with Kakashi for hours over how keeping him blindfolded wasn’t right, because something about light deprivation that Sakura had painstakingly explained to me but I just couldn’t remember.

No one listened to me about anything.

I’d also been removed from the proceedings for being too ‘emotional’ and ‘disruptive’.

And now it was all over, and Sasuke was here.

He sat on the couch, an arm tossed over his eyes like it was still too bright for him here in the dark.

I felt myself drawn to him.  I moved slowly, letting him feel me coming before I leaned over the back of the couch and wrapped both arms around him, stub and all.

He breathed out heavily.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” I said quietly, leaning in closer and pressing my cheek to his.

He swallowed.  “I…” he started to say, and stopped, his arm dropping from his eyes as he leaned back into me.

I couldn’t help but grin, squeezing him tightly.

Sasuke’s eyes met mine and his cheeks flushed.  “Enough,” he muttered.

I bumped my forehead to his, then backed away.  “Do you need anything?  Are you hungry?  Oh, you know what, we should have a party!  We could get everyone together and-”

“No.”

“Whaaaat?” I protested, climbing over the back of the couch and sitting next to him.  “But you’ve been in prison for like months, and you’re finally free and you can do all the things that you missed out on!”

“I didn’t miss out on anything,” he said flatly.

“But everyone-”

“My head hurts and I just want to be here with you, okay?”

“I, uh, yeah, I mean… yeah, okay,” I said, not sure how to take that, but overall feeling happy.  I just felt right when Sasuke was next to me.

We were both quiet, but it didn’t feel strained.  Since the Valley of the End, our relationship had gotten easy.  Late night talks in the hospital faded into daily visits to his holding cell.  We’d probably spent more quality time together in the last year than we had in total the rest of our lives.

“You can finish that book,” he finally said, eyes closed and his head leaned back.

“Ah-HA, so you do like it,” I said, grinning.  I had been reading Sasuke an assortment of books during his blind imprisonment, and the latest had been what I had assumed to be a cheesy teen romance recommended by Sakura, but had ended up being a really interesting mystery that also happened to have a surprisingly engaging romantic plot.

“It’s fine,” he said with a shrug, because Sasuke could never say anything nice about anything or anyone.

I bounded off to my room to pull the book from my ‘prison visit bag’ that I suddenly realized I wouldn’t need anymore.  I grinned, coming back to flop on the couch and cracking the book open to start reading.  I realized it was too dark to read, so I flipped on the table lamp.

Sasuke kept his eyes closed, but his posture seemed to relax the longer I read.

I found my eyes darting over the book to watch him, so close I could reach out and touch him if I wanted.  Sasuke was really here, and I could feel myself smiling stupidly.

I tried to focus on reading, but I was starting to spend more time staring, and Sasuke finally caught on, eyes drifting open to meet mine.

Those eyes were mesmerizing.

“You stopped reading,” he observed drily.

“Nuh-uh,” I said.

His lips quirked into a crooked smile.  “You definitely did.”

“You stopped reading!” I declared.

The smile evened out, soft and secretive.  “Idiot.  Pick up where you left off.”

“Who is the idiot here?” I grumbled.  Then I startled as I felt a squeeze around my hand.

Sasuke’s eyes were closed again.  “I like hearing your voice,” he said quietly, already reclaiming his hand like he hadn’t just reached out.

I swallowed.  It was one thing to have the new-and-improved, vulnerable and now-fifty-percent-more-honest Sasuke in front of me but out of my reach due to a set of iron bars.  It was quite another to have him sitting on my couch.  I wanted to move heaven and earth for him, but I settled for reading him some fiction instead.

We finished the book.

Sasuke slowly unsank from the couch, eyes blinking open.  “Thanks,” he said, standing up and stretching.  His nub of a left arm barely reached over his head.

“Anything for my felon best friend,” I said, standing up, too, since that seemed to be what we were doing.  “Are you hungry?  You sure you don’t want to see anyone else?”

“God, no,” he said, which I assumed was his reply to the second question.  He did look a little thin, though.  “I just don’t want to think for a while, okay?”

“How does one not think?” I asked.

“I don’t know, I just watch you and do whatever you’re doing.”

“Jerk,” I said, giving him a playful shove.

He definitely looked like he wanted to shove me back, but he somehow restrained himself.  “Naruto.”

“Yes?” I said, standing at attention.

“I know you said I could stay if I got out…”

“When you got out,” I corrected him.

He half-smiled at that.  When had he started doing that?  I hoped Sakura didn’t see because she claimed to be over him and didn’t need to be having any relapses.  “Yes, well, here we are.”

“Here we are indeed,” I agreed.

“You don’t have to feel obligated.”

“I don’t.”

“I mean it.”

“I know.”

“Naruto.”

“Sasuke.”

He looked at me.

“I want you here,” I said.  “I need you here,” I correct myself.

“Lame,” he muttered, but there was that crooked half-smile again.

“Stay as long as you need,” I said firmly.

And he did.

 - 9 -

  Sasuke was simultaneously an amazing and terrible house guest.

He was always picking up after me, which made my apartment really clean, but also resulted in me never knowing where anything was.

He also cooked for me, which was delicious and nutritious, but the lack of cup noodles was a little depressing.

He was always there for me to come home to, but I knew he was there because he had nowhere else to go, and I knew he wasn’t happy here.

It had been almost five months now, and when I came clomping through the door, Sasuke already had dinner on the table.

“Hi, honey, I’m home!” I chirped, snagging a piece of fried chicken from the table and munching on it as I moved towards my room to dump my bag.

“Wash your hands,” Sasuke grumbled after me.

I was starting to think that living with Sasuke was probably what having a mother would be like, if said mother low-key couldn’t stand me.

“I don’t hear running water!” he yelled when I had dallied too long.

“Yeah, and I’m touching everything I possibly can!” I yelled back.  We did enjoy pissing each other off.

Sasuke was scowling at his rice bowl when I came back.

“All nice and clean,” I said, waggling my fingers at him.  The fingers of the prosthetic were a little stiff as I did so, but Tsunade said the arm would start to feel more natural eventually.

“You’re a pig,” he muttered, picking up the bowl and starting to eat.

“Yep” I agreed, picking up my own bowl and shoveling in as much food as could fit in my mouth.

He sneered at me.

I grinned.

There was the smallest uptick at the corner of his mouth.

I couldn’t stand to look at him anymore, so I focused on eating instead.

“I’ve got a place,” he said suddenly.

I opened my mouth to protest, but it was stuffed with food.

“Disgusting,” he growled at me.

I informed him that he shouldn’t just spring stuff on me while I was eating, but I don’t think he understood a word of it.

Or he was just pretending not to understand.

I swallowed the last of the food in my mouth as loudly and dramatically as possible.  “I told you that you can just stay here.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because we’re best friends!”

“What does that have to do with anything?” he asked, seeming to actually be getting annoyed now.

“Uhhh, because best friends being roommates is awesome?” I said.

That seemed to irritate him even more.  “I’m not really interested in being your live-in butler.”

“You’re not-” I started to say, but that was actually pretty accurate.

“Realized the truth, then?”

“It’s not like I asked you to do all this stuff for me!” I protested.

“It’s just that you’re a lazy, pathetic slob, and I have no choice as long as I’m here if I want to maintain my personal dignity?”

“You’re an asshole,” I complained.

“Naruto, really, really think hard about who the asshole is in this situation.”

I thought about it really, really hard.  “Shit, is it me?”

Sasuke swallowed down a smile.

His eyes wouldn’t meet mine, so I leaned into his vision.

The whole smile came out, lighting up his face.

“Why are you so good-looking?” I complained.

He quickly looked away again.  “Jealous?” he muttered.

“Yes!” I exclaimed.

“Good,” he grumbled.

“Sasuke, don’t go.”

“I already put down my first month’s rent.”

“Why would you go and do that?!” I cried.

“You’re a big boy, Naruto,” he said, looking down his nose at me.  “I’m sure you can live by yourself.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to,” I said.  “I like living with you, even if you’re a nag.”

‘A nag?’ he mouthed at me.

“I mean, you’re super uptight and obsessive combustive or whatever, but you’re pretty alright sometimes,” I said, trying to sound casual.

“You’re ridiculous,” he informed me, going back to eating like the conversation was over.

And it was.

He moved out the next day.

“This is dumb,” I told him as I dumped the one and only box of things he had from my apartment on the floor of his new place.

“You’re dumb,” he answered easily.

“You don’t even have any pots and pans!” I said, gesturing around.  “How are you going to eat?”

“You have literally one pot, Uzumaki,” he said, shaking his head.

“I have TWO!” I yelled.

“I don’t count the rusty one.”

“Why not?”

“How have you survived this long living on your own?” he asked, shaking his head.

“Very well, thank you!” I snapped.

“Naruto,” he said, shaking his head harder.

It always gave me a strange thrill when he said my name.

Somehow we ended up getting take out, sitting on the floor of Sasuke’s semi-furnished apartment and passing a bottle of cheap wine between us that Kakashi had given Sasuke as a housewarming gift.

It got late and the bottle got empty, so I made myself at home on Sasuke’s futon.

“Why are we still living together?” he complained, nudging me with his foot to get me to slide over onto the second futon that he set out.  “I specifically moved out so we wouldn’t be living together anymore.”

“I like living with you,” I whined, kicking my feet around to show my protest.

“You’re a child,” Sasuke said, throwing a blanket over me and getting into his own futon.

“Sasukeeee,” I complained, creeping over to him and snuggling in close.

“Knock it off,” he muttered, turning his face from me.

“Jerk,” I said, closing my eyes and starting to drift.  It was possible that I was mildly intoxicated.

“Naruto, move,” Sasuke said, startling me awake as he pushed me away.

“Neveeeeeer,” I complained, attaching myself onto him tightly.

His face whipped around to glare at me, and then our faces were just right there in front of each other, millimeters apart.  Whatever he was going to snap at me died on his lips.

I snorted at that.  If he could only see his face.  He looked so uncool at that moment, and it was a memory I wanted to treasure forever.  I leaned in closer, feeling the heated skin of his forehead against mine.

Sasuke’s breath caught and his eyes locked onto mine.  There was something… hopeful… in his eyes.

I could feel myself going soft, reaching out my hand to rest against his cheek.

Then he pressed his lips to mine, warm and gentle.

It was just a brief touch and then it was over.

I shook my head at him, smiling.

It was like a signal, and suddenly his lips were back and it was much more than a simple touch, it was full of need and want and other nameless things, and what had I just done?

“Sasuke,” I said gently.

His mouth paused against mine.

“Sas’, I’m not gay,” I said, stroking his cheek with my thumb.

He stared at me.

I stared back evenly, trying to convey with my eyes that I was unbothered by this turn of events and still loved him like a brother.

He seemed to get the message, and he seemed to not like it very much, shoving me away and moving to make a run for it.

“Sasuke,” I repeated, grabbing his arm.

He turned back to look at me.

“It’s not a big deal,” I told him.

Something broke behind his eyes.

I realized that that had been the completely wrong thing to say.

He snatched his arm out of my grip and stormed out of the room.

“Sas’, come on,” I called, chasing after him.  “This is your house, where are you going anyway?”

“Away from you!” he snapped, finally speaking for the first time.

“Okay, but… this is your house?” I tried again.

“Just fuck off, Naruto,” he said, and I could hear all the cracks in his voice.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, I was definitely awake and sober now.  What had I done?  What had I done?  Oh shit.

“Go,” he said, his voice getting smaller and smaller.  “Please just go.”

“Sasuke,” I tried one more time.

He was standing in front of the kitchen sink, his back to me, unmoving.

“This doesn’t change anything…” I tried, wondering if I was cutting him with every word.  “You’re my best friend.  I don’t care if-”

“Go,” he growled, strength returning to his voice even as his shoulders seemed to be shaking.

“I’m going,” I said, backing my way towards the door.  “I’m going, okay?  I just want it to be clear that I don’t actually want to go and am only doing so because you asked me to.”

He didn’t say anything else.

There was nothing for me to do but leave.

 - 8 -

  “Naruto, no,” Sakura said, shaking her head.  “No, no, no, you did not leave him like that.”

“What else was I supposed to do?!” I cried, knocking my heels anxiously against the counter that I was sitting on.

“Anything!” she cried exasperatedly.  “Just don’t leave!”

“Well I did leave, and that’s where I’m at, so can you please give me some advice?”

Sakura sighed loudly and dropped herself onto one of her kitchen chairs.  “Naruto.”

“Yes?”

“Are you sure you’re not gay?”

I looked at her.  I hesitated.

Her expression perked up at that.

“I’m not gay,” I said quickly before she could get too excited.  “I definitely like girls.”

“Okay, but you could be bi,” she pointed out.

“I don’t like guys,” I said with a shrug.

“Okay, but you like Sasuke.”

I let her words sit between us for a moment.  “I can’t say clearly that I… I don’t know.  As you love to point out, I talk about Sasuke all the time, I think about him all the time-”

“He’s basically your reason for existence.”

“…that’s fair.”

She smiled at that.

“Like, I get all that,” I said.  “I get that our relationship isn’t normal.  But there’s no… spark?”

“You two literally set each other on fire,” Sakura said, not buying it.

“It’s hard to explain,” I said, shaking my head.  “But when he kissed me, it was warm and it was nice and all, but there was no spark.  It wasn’t… I don’t know.  If I was in love with him, wouldn’t I have felt something… more?”

“So what you’re saying, if I am getting this correctly, is that the warm, nice feelings that Sasuke gives you are nothing compared to the cheap sparks you feel with all your floozies?” Sakura asked, giving me an unfriendly look.

“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying,” I grumbled, glaring at her.

“Interesting how you started going on all these dates after Sasuke came to live with you,” she commented.

“Interesting how?”

She shrugged.

“After the trial was finally over, maybe that was the first time in my life that I had time to put myself first,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest and daring her to find fault with me just living my life for once.

“I…” she trailed off, shaking her head.  “We all want you to be happy, Naruto.  But really?  Those underclassman girls?  Couldn’t you find someone… better?”

“What’s wrong with them?!” I cried.

“They don’t have any… substance,” Sakura said.  “They just like you because you’re the hero of Konoha; they don’t know anything about you.”

“That’s why we go on dates to get to know each other,” I explained to her.

“There are plenty of girls our age who like you, too, you know.”

“Yeah, but…” I trailed off.  I didn’t know how to explain it without Sakura hitting me.

Her look turned suspicious.

“I just… need something different,” I said with a shrug.  “I need… a break?  I guess?  Sometimes it’s nice to be around people who didn’t go through what we went through?”

Sakura was suddenly up on her feet and moving towards me.

I flinched.

“I’m not going to hit you, jerk,” she complained, punching me in the arm anyway.

I cringed, rubbing at the spot she’d hit.

“You want to be normal,” she said, her voice gentler now.  “I get that.  I do.  Everything that’s happened the last few years…  And then it seemed like things were finally going to get better and all that stuff with Sasuke being arrested happened…”

We were both quiet at that.  Sasuke’s arrest and confinement had been a sobering reminder that things were not right with the village.  When I thought about how Sasuke had been mistreated, tortured even, and had just endured it so he could stay…

Everything always came back to Sasuke.

“You really aren’t gay?” Sakura asked, sounding almost hopeful.

“I’m not gay,” I affirmed.

“What are you going to do?”

“I came here to ask you that!” I cried.

“You’re the Sasuke-whisperer,” she said, shaking her head.  “All I ever seem to do is make him annoyed.”

“The Sasuke-whisperer?” I repeated incredulously.

“He listens to you, even if he belittles you the whole while,” she said with a smile. Then her face went serious.  “He loves you.”

That was a heavy word to throw into the conversation.

I dropped my head in my hands and yelled my frustration, kicking my feet anxiously against the cabinets.

Sakura rested her hand on my head, calming and soothing.

“His face…” I mumbled.

“What are you going on about?” Sakura asked.

I finally sat up properly and looked at her.  “His face when I rejected him…  I hurt him.  I really, really hurt him, and I don’t know how to fix it.”

“He does have his pride.”

“Ughhh don’t remind me.”

“Just be your usual jackass self, and I’m sure things will go back to normal eventually,” she said, patting me on the head.

“You think so?”

“Yeah,” she said, climbing onto the counter and sitting next to me.

I leaned my head against hers, kicking my feet absently.

“It really doesn’t bother you, though?” she asked quietly.

“What?”

“That he likes you.”

“…no…?”

“It can be stressful on a friendship,” she said carefully.

“Are you trying to say something about my childish crush on you?”

“More about my childish crush on Sasuke, but that, too,” she agreed.  “You could be so annoying, and it was uncomfortable.”

“Sorry,” I said, tapping her knee lightly.  “I know.  But it’s not like Sasuke’s anything like me, yeah?  I mean, I act more like I have a crush on him than he acts like he has a crush on me.”

“That’s for sure,” Sakura snorted.  “You really do.  But I see it in him, you know?  He’s just different with you.  I think you don’t always notice, because how he acts when you’re around and how he acts when you’re not are completely different.”

“What, does he suddenly become a nice and charming guy?” I asked with my own snort.

She shook her head.  “He’s… softer when he’s with you.  He smiles more.  His shoulders relax.  When you two fight, he gets this wrinkle between his brows, and he finally looks young, he finally looks like the teenager he’s supposed to be.  But when you’re not around, he’s just dark and… hard to approach.  He has this impenetrable armor up that only comes down around you.”

I squinted at her.  “And you don’t still have a crush on him, right?”

“What do you care?” she said, rolling her eyes.

“Well you just seem to have put a lot of time and effort into your observations…”

“Don’t you keep like a diary about your Sasuke observations…?”

“That was for the trial!” I cried.

Sakura laughed.

I tried to laugh, but I felt tired and defeated.  “Did I lead him on?”

“Yes,” she said flatly.

“Crap.”

“It’ll work out,” she assured me.

It didn’t work out.

 - 7 -

  It felt like we were twelve again.

“Is that all you’ve got?” Sasuke scoffed at me as he easily dodged my attack.

“It’s not even half of what I’ve got!” I roared as I chased after him.

He stopped mid-step, spinning around effortlessly and putting his sword to my neck.

I jerked myself back, leaning away from the glittering steel.

“Pathetic.”

“Is it?” I asked, my clone suddenly attacking from above.

“Absolutely,” he affirmed, taking his sword from my neck to slice through my clone.

It gave me the time to dive-bomb his legs.

Sasuke let out a grunt as we hit the ground, then took advantage of our momentum to flip me onto my back.

I got a foot free and kicked him in the stomach, sending him flying backwards.

Unfortunately, he had a grip on my leg, and I went flying with him.

We were a mess of fists and kicks and pain and blood, and I wasn’t quite sure when this training session had turned into a street brawl.

“What is wrong with you two?!” Sakura asked exasperatedly as she patched us up at the clinic.

“We were training,” Sasuke said, a sullen look on his face as he held a cold compress to his black eye.

“Is that what you call it?” she muttered, slathering the antibacterial ointment on my gaping sword wound with a little more roughness than seemed necessary.

“Owwww…” I whined.

She smacked me upside the head.

“You’re the worst doctor ever!” I cried.

“And you two are the worst patients!” she snapped back.  “Why are you wasting my time with this juvenile nonsense?”

“We were training!” I protested.

“This is not normal training!” she yelled, smacking me again.

I stuck out my lower lip at her, rubbing my head.

“And don’t think I only blame this on the dumb blond!” Sakura said, turning her fury on Sasuke.  “What were you thinking, using your sword on his prosthetic?!  There could be permanent damage!”

Sasuke glared at her but didn’t speak.

“You’re being a child,” Sakura said, eyes locking with his.

Sasuke’s expression immediately transformed into rage, and I took a step back.

Sakura just raised an eyebrow.  She had really grown in the last year and a half, and I was very impressed by it, which was the reason I was letting her stand between Sasuke and I now.

It wasn’t because I was hiding.

“Naruto, just go,” Sakura said irritably, gesturing me towards the door.

I glanced at Sasuke, but his gaze was still fixed on Sakura.  “Are you-?” I started to ask.

“Go!” they both snapped at me.

So I left.

Things between Sasuke and I hadn’t been right since the night he moved out.  Since he… you know.  And now he was saying that as soon as his probation was over, he was going to leave the village.

It was all so stupid.  I didn’t understand why things couldn’t go back to how they were before.  Well, I mean like how they were after the war, not to how things were when we couldn’t be honest with each other and just fought all the time instead, which was basically the same as things were now.

“What happened to you?!”

I slid into the booth across from my girlfriend Moe, grinning sheepishly.  “Training.”

“I’ve never had a training session like that,” she said with a laugh.  She laughed a lot, smiled easily, and was in general a pleasant, happy person to be around.

‘Easy to be happy when there’s nothing between the ears,’ Sakura had been known to say.

I mostly ignored her snide little comments.

“Oh, the stupidest thing happened on our mission today,” she said, still smiling.

I felt myself smiling for some reason.  All the heaviness I’d been feeling all day suddenly seemed to drop away.  I leaned in closer, and listened intently to her story.

 - 6 -

  “I don’t agree to this,” I grumbled, slumping into Sasuke’s couch.

“Good thing it has nothing to do with you, then,” he replied, putting down a bowl of popcorn on the coffee table.

I reached for it, stuffing the popcorn into my face as angrily as I could.  “It has everything to do with me!” I yelled with a full mouth.

“You are disgusting,” he informed me, giving me a light shove.  “Move over.”

“There’s plenty of room,” I complained, gesturing to the open space next to me.

“Why do you always have to sit in the middle?” he asked irritably.  He gave me another shove.  “Sit next to the armrest like a normal person.”

“Oh, I’m a normal person now?” I asked, feigning surprise.  “Because you keep telling me how weird and crazy I am for not wanting you to leave.”

“Because you are weird and crazy,” he said, sitting as close to the armrest as he could, which subsequently meant he was sitting as far away from me as possible.

“In what way am I either of those things?!” I demanded.

“You know what the village did to me,” he said, his voice low and dark.

I stopped at that.  We were being serious now, no more play-fighting.  “I know.” “Nothing has changed, Naruto.”

“No,” I agreed quietly.  “But I’m trying.”

“You’re one man.”

“Sometimes I’m a hundred men.”

He gave me a withering look.

I reached for him then, my hand resting on his shoulder as I sought out a physical connection.  “Everything that’s happened… it’s never going to happen to anyone ever again.”

“Oh, really?” he asked, looking unimpressed.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, my voice cracking.

Sasuke softened.  “Don’t be like that.”

“Be like what?”

“You’re blaming yourself for something you fought tooth and nail against.”

“I couldn’t stop them.”

“Exactly.”

“Exactly what?” I asked, starting to feel blubbery.  I always felt so frustrated and helpless thinking about what had happened to Sasuke and how I hadn’t been able to stop it.

“If you couldn’t stop them, then no one can,” he said.  “Konoha won’t change, so give up and move on.  Now can we watch this damn movie already?”

If I wanted to continue the tentative peace that we’d developed over the last couple of months, then I would back off and watch the movie.

“We have to be the ones who start the change,” I said, still holding onto his shoulder and staring him down.  “I need you here with me, fighting the Council, fighting all the backwards-thinking clan leaders, fighting-”

“-the hokage?” Sasuke suggested, raising an eyebrow.

I took in a breath and let it out slowly.  “Baa-chan is doing what she can-”

“She approved the terms of my surrender.”

“You approved the terms of your surrender.”

“Pretty sure I didn’t agree to abuse and torture.”

“She didn’t… know…”

“The beatings, sure, even you didn’t know, and you were there to see me every day,” he said, meeting my gaze calmly.  “But the constant blindfolding and the binding… you fought about it with Kakashi.  He had to be reporting to her.”

“I’m sorry,” I said quietly, feeling my heart break all over again.

“All of that doesn’t matter,” he said, pushing me back into my seat.  He stood up and pressed the tape into the VCR.  “Ninety-eight more days and I get what I wanted.”

“…I wish you’d told me.”

“Because you were making so much headway on the blindfolding issue.”

“Yeah, but that guard…”

“And what did you do when I told you?”

I flushed.  Maybe I had rushed off to the prison in a blind rage and had only come back to my senses when the guard was lying bleeding on the floor while a hysterical Sakura held me back.

“You can’t be so emotional, Naruto,” he chided me, adjusting the volume of the TV as the coming attractions played.  “I was never in any danger-”

“He beat you for no reason-”

“He was scared of me,” Sasuke said with an easy shrug.  “And for good reason.  He could cover my eyes as much as he wanted; I could have broken out and broken him any time I wanted.”

“You didn’t have to endure all that.”

“I did.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did it for you, you dumbass,” he said, staring very pointedly at the TV.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked, feeling weirdly happy while also simultaneously pissed off.

“You’re so ignorant,” he muttered.

“Use your words,” I complained, giving him a shove.

“Use your brain,” he shot back, giving me a return shove.

This was about to dissolve into more schoolyard brawling, which I thought we had moved past, but clearly we had not.  “Just explain it to me,” I said, the grip I hadn’t even realized I had on his collar loosening.  “Since I’m so dumb and all.”

“You are dumb,” he agreed, his own grip relaxing.

The movie started playing, but it was just background noise now.

“You can’t be associated with a missing nin,” he finally said.

“Why not?” I asked, leaning back against the couch.

He clearly wanted to say something cutting but swallowed it back down.  “I’m not going to take your future away from you,” he said, the words straining to come out.

“How-?” I started to ask.

Sasuke made a very frustrated-sounding noise.  “Stop asking questions.  What are you not getting?  You following a missing nin around like a lost fucking puppy does not exactly instill the Council with trust in your ability to lead.  So I did my fucking best to be reinstated to this bullshit village that murdered my family just so you could stop fucking up your future, and then you fucking go and still fuck it up anyway by losing your shit on that guard.  You’re right, me enduring all of that really was pointless and I should have just…” he trailed off, running out of steam.

“Wait, wait, you did all this just so I could be hokage?” I asked, scratching the back of my neck.

“Go die,” he muttered.

“You are the most awful human being I have ever met,” I informed him.  “Sas’, I… I mean, I don’t get it.  You have so much pride, and I can’t imagine you…  He hit you!  He left marks on you, and you’re saying that you just put up with it so I could hypothetically be the leader of the village you hate one day?”

“I need you to be the hokage,” he said, his voice so soft it was hard to hear.

“Why?” I asked, inching closer and trying to get him to meet my eyes.

“Can you just drop it?” he asked, skillfully avoiding my gaze.

“No.”

He took in a breath and let it out loudly,

I put my hand on his knee, fingers curling into the loose fabric of his pants.  “Why do you need me to be the hokage, Sas’?” I pleaded.

His eyes slid shut, a worry line forming between them.  “Why can’t you just let things go?”

“Because when you keep secrets from me, our relationship gets all messed up,” I said.

“It’s not a damn secret, you’re just incapable of connecting the dots.”

“Well if it’s something I’m apparently too dumb to understand without further explanation, then you are keeping it from me by not explaining.”

Air escaped from his nose in what was either a smothered laugh or an exasperated sigh.

“Naruto…”

My breath caught a little.  Sasuke just had a way of saying my name.

“You’re the only one I trust, okay?” he said, eyes flicking to mine and then flicking away again.  “You’re the only one who can fix everything.”

“…but you’re always telling me I can’t change anything…”

“You are very, very incompetent,” he agreed, that sideways half-smile making a reappearance on his lips.  “But I… I told you.  At the Valley of the End.  It was my loss.  I’ve thrown away my revenge to follow you.”

“You don’t… follow me in anything…” I said, not sure why my face was suddenly heating up.

“I’m not going to be one of your mindless sycophants and just agree with whatever you say and do,” he said.  “And I don’t think you want me to.  You know you only reach your highest potential when I’m challenging you on everything.”

“Yeah,” I said quietly, squeezing his knee.  “So why are you leaving then?”

“It’s what’s best.”

“Well I don’t think it’s what’s best, so…”

“Naruto,” he said, eyes finally meeting mine without running away.  “If you…” he paused, licking his lips like he was nervous.  “If you really… if you ask me not to leave, then I won’t leave.  I’ll listen to you and I’ll follow you, but… if you keep me here, I don’t think I can… I feel trapped, Naruto.  It’s painful to be here.”

I could see the pain in his eyes, and it made my stomach knot up.

“I didn’t want to tell you all this because now you know how much power you have over me,” he said, his hand pushing against mine like he wanted me to move it, but then his fingers laced into mine.  “I don’t show my weaknesses to anyone, and I feel… exposed.  But I trust you with that.  Do you understand me?  I’m trusting you not to exploit this.  I’m trusting you to do the right thing.  Because if you don’t, then you’re just showing me that I was wrong and that you’re just like everyone else.”

Vulnerable Sasuke was the most cutting Sasuke.  “Sneaky bastard,” I muttered, because how could I ever ask him to stay after he said all that.

“Do you understand everything now?” he asked, taking his hand back and looking away.

“No, not at all,” I said.  “But I guess I get the important stuff.”

“Good.  So what the hell has been happening in this movie?”

I laughed.  “Rewind it.”

He got up and hit the rewind button.

“Sas’?”

“Yeah?” he asked, his back still to me as he crouched in front of the VCR.

“What if I don’t want to be hokage?”

“Don’t be stupid.”

“What if I don’t want to be, and I want to go with you?”

“Don’t be stupid,” he repeated.

I sighed loudly.  “Fine.”

The tape finished rewinding and Sasuke hit play, coming back to sit next to me.  He rested his head against the back of the couch, then turned to look at me.

I turned to look at him, too.

He smiled at me, soft and sweet and a little sad.

My lips parted.

He sat back up straight, attention focusing on the TV.

We watched the movie.

 - 5 -

  Sasuke was annoyed.

Of course, he was always annoyed when he was in Konoha, and he had to check in every six months, which meant that twice a year, Sasuke was very annoyed.

He was annoyed a lot of other times throughout the year, too, but he was particularly annoyed now.

“If you want to go and breed with your female, then just go,” he grumbled at me.

“Did you really just say ‘breed’?” Ino repeated, cracking up.

“Don’t forget ‘your female’,” Sakura chimed in, and the two of them started laughing harder.

“Hey, nothing is more important than spending time with you,” I slurred, significantly inebriated.

Rino waved at us from across the bar where she was getting more alcohol to inebriate us farther.  Her boobs jiggled in her low-cut top as she did so.

I smiled dreamily.

“At least she’s a chuunin this time,” Sakura muttered, losing her amusement at the sight of a young, attractive female.

I suddenly found myself being punched in the arm.  “What the hell!”

Sakura glared at me.

“You said that out loud,” Sasuke whispered to me.

“Oh…” I said.  “Oops.”

Sasuke smiled at that, making me feel warm and happy.

All I had to do was act like an idiot to make him smile that amazing smile.

He looked away, flushing.

“You said that out loud, too,” Ino said, laughing.

“Umm, maybe I’m too drunk for this bar…” I trailed off as Rino reappeared with our drinks.  “Thanks, babe,” I said, taking a beer from her.

She grinned at me as she passed out the rest of the drinks.

“Maybe it’s time to head home,” Sakura suggested, having finished her entire drink in one go.

“Aw, what, no way…” I complained.

“Sasuke seems tired,” Ino said.

If I wasn’t mistaken, Sasuke was shooting her a grateful look.  But that was ridiculous, because Sasuke only liked me.

“People are allowed to like more than one person,” Ino informed me.  “And I am very likeable.”

“Not that much,” Sasuke said, taking a casual sip of his drink.

Ino’s mouth twisted into a snarl.  “To think I was going to save you from-” she started to say, but stopped.

Sasuke and Ino seemed to be having a conversation with eyes and head tilts that was completely unreadable to me.

“What’s going on?” Rino whispered to me.

“I have no idea,” I whispered back, sliding an arm around her waist.

She smiled at that, pressing closer to me even though our chairs were already plenty close together.

All of the sudden the other three were standing up.

“Okay, we’ll see you later,” Sakura said, patting me on the arm.

“Bye, ‘kura,” I said.  “Bye, Ino.”

Sasuke moved to walk past me.

I caught his arm.

He looked startled, which couldn’t possibly be, because Uchiha Sasuke was never startled.

“We’re training tomorrow, yeah?”

“If you can find your way to the training field,” he said with a shrug.

“Your ass is mine, Uchiha,” I said cheerfully.

Sasuke just frowned at that, shaking me off.  “Tomorrow then.”

“Bye, Sasuke,” Rino said, waving to him with a friendly smile.

He inclined his head towards her and made his exit.

Rino giggled.  “He lives up to all the rumors.”

“What kinda rumors?” I asked, trying to narrow my eyes but it felt more like I was going cross-eyed.

“That he’s mysterious and hot,” she said.

“Oh,” I said, relaxing.  “Yeah, he is definitely those rumors.”

Rino laughed.

“Let’s get out of here,” I suggested, and she nodded happily, linking arms with me.

We stumbled along to my house, and I somehow managed to get the door open and get us inside.

“You’re drunk,” Rino teased.

“Drunk on you,” I said, leading her to my room.

It felt different than usual.

I couldn’t stop myself, pushing her onto her stomach and staring at the white skin of her back.

“Naruto!”

I was lost, moving like an animal.

“Naruto!”

“Sasuke!”

 - 4 -

  “So you’re definitely not gay?” Sakura asked.

“I’m not,” I confirmed, pacing around my kitchen.

“Okay, but you called out your male best friend’s name during sex, so…”

“I don’t know why that happened.”

“Well, I mean, you were having sex, and you were thinking about Sasuke while you were having sex, so…”

“I’m not gay,” I said flatly.

“How are you so sure?”

“Because I don’t like dicks,” I explained.  “And I feel like liking dicks is a very important part of being gay.”

“I mean, it could be important, but I don’t think it’s the defining factor of whether or not a person is gay,” Sakura offered.  “Do those cookies have peanut butter in them?”

“They do,” I confirmed, picking up the package from the shelf and handing it to her.

“How do you even know that you don’t like dicks?” Sakura continued.  “Have you ever tried touching one that wasn’t your own?”

I wrinkled my nose at her.  “No, thank you.”

“How do you know you don’t like it if you don’t try it?”

“Have you touched a dick that isn’t your own?” I shot back.

Sakura gave me a withering look.

“Well?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

“A lady doesn’t stroke and tell,” she said with an enigmatic shrug.

“Sakuraaaaaa,” I groaned.  “This isn’t helping.”

“There’s no help for you if you insist on staying so deeply closeted,” she replied.

“How do you just decide a person’s sexuality for them when they’re clearly telling you that you’re wrong about it?” I asked irritably.

“You’re in love with a man,” she ground out, just as irritably.  “That, by definition, makes you gay.”

“I love him,” I said, waving her off.  “That’s not the same as being in love.”

“Okay, then stop calling his name out during sex and everything will be fine.”

“…I was thinking about him…” I whispered.

She looked at me, waiting.

“…I was imagining it was him in front of me, and it just…” I trailed off.  “I was drunk, it didn’t mean anything!”

“We are venturing into TMI territory here, but Naruto, you need to explain this to me,” she said, nibbling on a cookie.  “Why were you thinking about Sasuke and not about your girlfriend?”

“I don’t know,” I said, shaking my head.  “I really don’t.  I mean, I really like Rino.  She’s so nice and friendly, and she always smiles, and she’s really pretty…”

“Sounds like you’re describing me, but okay…”

“You in an alternative universe, maybe…”

“Do you want my help or not?”

“You’re very nice and friendly and pretty.”

“Thank you,” Sakura said, finishing off her cookie and pulling out another one.  “I know you don’t want to hear this again-”

I groaned.

“-but you tend to date girls who don’t have a lot of substance,” she forged ahead.  “And at first, it made sense because you were young and unattached…”

“I’m still both of those things…”

“Funny that you think so.”

“I am in the prime of my youth!”

“Uzumaki, you are twenty-five years old,” Sakura said, shaking her head.  “Your dad was already the hokage and married with a baby on the way younger than that.”

“Like you’re dating anyone!” I cried.  “I mean, who from our generation is even remotely on track to get married?!”

“And why is that?” Sakura asked, tilting her head to the side.

I looked at her.

She looked back at me.

Since the war, Sakura had been my best friend, despite me always giving the title to Sasuke.  We told each other everything, whether it was easy to hear or not, and she had certainly dropped a lot of hard-to-hear truths on me over the years.

“Because we’re all traumatized from being child soldiers?” I asked.

She nodded at me.

“So I choose to date girls who I can’t form meaningful relationships with because I’m not ready to confront… something something,” I concluded.

“Close enough,” she said with a rueful smile.  “I want you to be happy, you know.”

“I know,” I said, knowing better than to protest that I was happy.  “I want you to be happy, too.”

“Maybe Sasuke isn’t so crazy…” she said quietly.

“Whaddya mean?”

“Maybe leaving the village…” she trailed off.

It wasn’t the first time we’d broached the topic, but we never saw it through.

“Baa-chan said the Council is thinking about making me hokage soon,” I said.

“She’s been saying that since the war ended,” Sakura said with a frown.  She would always love Tsunade as much as I did, but we both knew that things weren’t right in the village.  Kakashi tried to act as a go-between, but the more he asked us to compromise while literally nothing changed, the less we were inclined to.

We were both quiet.

“So your thing about dicks, is that because of the Kiba Incident?” Sakura finally asked.

“DON’T BRING THAT UP!” I shrieked.

“But I was thinking…”

“About Kiba’s dick?!”

“God, no,” Sakura said, making a face.  “I was thinking about the time we were on a mission, and you were on watch while we were sleeping-”

“Sakura-chan, you stop right there.”

“-and you went to get Kiba for his watch, and he was in flagrante-”

“I told you to stop- wait, what is ‘foie gras day’?” I paused, scratching my head.

“Caught in the act, dick in hand-”

“OH MY GOD, SAKURA, STOP!” I cried, covering my eyes with my hands even though the vision was burned into my memory for the rest of time.  “It was so red and angry…” I whispered.

Sakura made a face but laughed.  “See, but what if it was Sasuke?”

“IT’S NO DIFFERENT!” I yelled.

“Really?  ‘Cause I definitely don’t want to picture Kiba in your story, but if it were Sasuke-”

“Sakura-chan!” I cried, incensed.  “Don’t sully our Sasuke like that.”

“He’s an emotionally stunted asshole, but he’s still eye candy,” Sakura said with a shrug.

“Okay, but you clearly like dicks,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

“‘Like’ is a strong word,” she said, shaking her head.  “I tolerate them.”

“Gross,” I muttered, and then unbidden the image of Kiba in the tent reappeared in my mind, only with Sasuke’s face floating over Kiba’s.  I gagged.  “Nope, nope, nope.”

“I don’t understand you,” Sakura said, shaking her head.  “So if Sasuke was like in between your legs right now going down on you, you’d be absolutely disgusted just because he’s a guy?”

Sakura certainly painted a picture, because now there Sasuke was between my legs, mouth full, eyes creased in concentration before suddenly darting up to meet my gaze.  He smirked, and I felt my entire body shudder.

“You got turned on!” Sakura accused me, pointing her finger.

“I… did…” I trailed off, thoroughly confused.

Her expression softened.  “I’m not trying to push you into something,” she said, patting my head.  “I just... I look at you two, and I wish that someone would love me the way you two love each other.”

“Sakura,” I complained, shaking my head.  “You know I love you.”

“You wanna marry me?”

“Definitely not.”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t want to marry Sasuke either,” I pointed out.

“Yeah, but you want him to blow you.”

“Oh my god, Sakura, never say that out loud again!”

She shrugged.

“Sakura-chaaaaaaan,” I whined.

“I won’t,” she said, serious again.  She hopped onto the counter and put her arm around me.  “I won’t bring any of this up again, okay?  I promise.  We’ll only talk about it if you bring it up.”

“Which I won’t,” I said, but I could feel her side-eyeing me.  “Unless I picture him in fois gras day again.”

Sakura cracked up.

 - 3 -

  I woke up on Sasuke’s floor, a blanket tossed over me.  I groaned, sitting up and stretching my aching back.  “Sas’?” I called.

He didn’t answer me because he was an asshole, but I could hear water running in the kitchen.

I stumbled to my feet and took a quick stop at the restroom before stumbling the rest of the way to the kitchen.  “Saaaasukeeeeee,” I whined, dropping onto one of his kitchen chairs.  “What did you make me drink last night?”

“Don’t blame me for your bad decisions,” he said with a shrug.

I squinted at his shirtless back, watching as he moved around preparing breakfast.  “Hey, you,” I said.

“Hey what?” he asked, cracking an egg over the frying pan with one hand.

“When’d you get all… manly?” I complained.

“This might surprise you, but I’ve always been a man.”

“No, no, no,” I said, shaking my head.  “You were a boy before.  You had some muscles and all, but not all this finely-chiseled definition.  You look like a freaking statue that some old statue guy would make.���

“‘Old statue guy?’” he muttered incredulously, flipping the eggs.

“You know what I mean!” I said, flailing my arms around.

“No, not really.”

I sighed loudly.  “I wish I looked like you.”

“Why?” he asked, genuinely perplexed.

“Your body is amazing.”

“Are you fishing for compliments or something?” he mumbled.

“Huh?”

He stayed silent, his back rigid.

I had as usual stumbled into the ‘danger zone’.

I found myself stumbling into it more and more since the whole Wrong Name Incident.  It wasn’t like I was trying to flirt with Sasuke all the time.  It happened by accident.  I was really just trying to give the guy a compliment and express my jealousy over the fact that his body was a work of art.

...was that gay…?

I stared at those rippling back muscles, mesmerized.

Then I was having eggs slammed down in front of me.

Sasuke sat across from me, stabbing his food with what seemed to be much more force than necessary for something that was already dead.  “You’ve grown up, too, you know,” he finally mumbled.

“I have?” I asked with a mouth full of food.

“Swallow.”

I swallowed.

“I take it back,” he said, not looking at me.

“No takesy-backsies.”

“This is how you convince me that you’ve grown up?”

“…yes…?”

There was that half-smile.

I grinned, shoveling my food in my mouth and feeling content.

 - 2 -

  Sakura came into the restaurant, looking around furtively before her eyes locked on mine.  She made a beeline in our direction.

“Hey-” I tried to greet her.

“Sasuke is here.”

I blinked slowly, then broke out into a grin.  “Really?  He’s early!”

“He’s pissed,” she said, trying to drag down my good mood.

“About Tsunade trying to give him that mission?”

“He told her he doesn’t take orders from Konoha,” Sakura rushed on.  “So she said, ‘then maybe you don’t need the immunity that your Konoha headband gives you,’ and then he did his sneer face, you know the one, and he said, ‘make Naruto hokage or I walk.’”

“Whaaaaat?” I cried.

“And Tsunade was playing it cool, like, ‘well, walk then,’ and Sasuke said, ‘I walk, he walks.’”

I stared at her.  “…and then?”

“He stormed out of there without waiting for a reply in typical over-dramatic Sasuke fashion,” she concluded.

I groaned.

“Who’s Sasuke?” my girlfriend Naomi asked cheerfully.

We both looked at her.

“What do you mean, ‘who is Sasuke’?” Sakura finally asked incredulously.

“He’s my best friend…” I tried.

“Oh, the weird guy who’s never around?” she asked.

“Yes,” Sakura said, nodding her head and tugging on my arm.

“He’s not weird!” I cried, feeling offended.

“We need to mediate this before it turns into something bigger,” Sakura urged me.

“But I was-” I started to say, glancing over at Naomi.  Then I realized that we were talking about Sasuke and felt myself rising out of the booth, date long forgotten.

Naomi looked at me, confused.  “Naruto?”

“Rain check!” I called, already moving after Sakura.

She turned back after we got onto the street.  “Where do you think he went?”

“Training grounds,” I said, nodding my head in their direction.

“Okay,” she said, taking to the rooftops.

Sasuke was there as expected, angrily setting things on fire with his katon.

“Are we talking him down or beating sense into him?” Sakura asked, cracking her knuckles.

“Oi, Sasuke!” I yelled.

Sasuke stopped setting things on fire.

Sakura shook her head.

He sat down on the grass, and we came over to sit on either side of him.

“I didn’t know you were here,” I said, nudging his side with my elbow.

“I had business with the hokage,” he replied with a shrug.

“Business,” Sakura grumbled.

“You know I’m right,” he grumbled right back at her.

“Of course I know!” she snapped.  “But if what you’re saying to Tsunade-sama gets back to to the wrong person, you’re going straight back into the Bingo Book!  And then what?!”

“I can take care of myself.”

“You know if you leave the village again that we’re going to follow you,” Sakura muttered.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at that.  “Do I know that?”

“You know that Naruto will,” she said dismissively.

“I didn’t know that you would.”

Sakura shook her head.  “Underestimating me like usual.”

“Underestimating that you wouldn’t be as dumb as Naruto?” Sasuke asked.  “Yes.”

There was a pause, and then Sasuke grunted and I knew that Sakura had inflicted some kind of hurt on him.

“Sas’, it’s just reconnaissance,” I said, hoping to change the direction of the conversation.

The glare I received did not ease my mind.

“And what is the illustrious Council going to use that reconnaissance for?” he ground out.  “Because you know they’re stirring up shit with Lightning again.”

“Sas’…”

“The whole point is that you become the hokage and stop all this nonsense,” Sasuke said.  “It’s the whole point, and the Council knows, and they know that as long as they keep dangling the carrot and saying that they’ll make you hokage one day that I have to do whatever they tell me.  They fucking own me, and I can’t… I can’t breathe, I can’t…”

I was at a loss.

Sakura put her arm around Sasuke, and he leaned into her, away from me.

This was all my fault.  I had let this drag on, I had accepted all the soon’s and the be patient’s.  I looked at my two best friends, both hurting, and I knew that I couldn’t keep on just going with the flow.

“I’ve got you,” I said, standing up.

“What does that mean…?” Sakura trailed off as I walked away.

“Naruto.”

I stopped and turned back to look at them.

“Don’t do something stupid,” Sasuke said, already on his feet.

“Just trust me,” I said.  I grinned at him.  “I’ve got this.”

 - 1 -

  Sasuke unzipped the flap of the tent, his toiletries tucked in a bag under his arm as he entered.  “You’re not asleep?” he asked.

“You’d think I would be, with how friggin’ long you take to get ready for bed,” I complained.

“I was checking the perimeter, dumbass,” he replied, putting his things away in his pack.

“He’s over here calling me ‘dumbass’,” I muttered.

“He’s over there talking to himself,” came his easy reply.

“Okay, but would it kill you to show me like a modicum of respect?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“It would not!” I cried.

“Oh, but it would,” he said, getting into his sleeping bag.  “Good night, Junior Hokage.”

“Okay, see, you’re still alive.”

Sasuke didn’t answer.

“Very alive and not dead.”

He still didn’t answer.

“Jackass,” I complained, throwing my pillow at him.

He caught it and threw it back at me, amusement twinkling in his eyes.

I melted a little.

“What’s that stupid look for?” Sasuke scoffed at me.

“What look?  There’s no stupid look!” I protested

He rolled his eyes at me.  “You have clearly never seen your own face.”

I gave him the most shocked and offended look I could muster up.

His haughtiness softened around the edges, the left corner of his mouth twitching upward.  “Sorry, sir.”

I bit my lip a little too hard.

Sasuke looked pleased with himself as he settled more comfortably into his sleeping bag.

I tried to pull myself together, but being on a mission in close proximity to him was starting to become a mission in its own right.  The Council had agreed to my three-year transition plan, and had begrudgingly accepted Sasuke as my ‘chief adviser’ or whatever they were calling his job to make an Uchiha in power sound more palatable.

What they didn’t get and never would get was that Sasuke was my partner.

“You lead and I’ll follow,” he’d told me the night it was decided that I was the hokage-elect.

“Like you’ve ever followed anyone a day in your life,” I’d scoffed.

Four months into the transition, and Sasuke had yet to just do something because I told him to.  That wasn’t what he meant by following me.  What he meant was that I could tell him to do something, and then he would give me ten reasons why he wasn’t going to do it.

And it was exactly what I needed.  I felt re-energized.  I felt hopeful.  I felt like I was making a difference.

And I felt like I was probably most definitely in love with Sasuke.

“Are you going to sleep?” he asked.

My eyes flicked over to him nervously.

He gave me a strange look.  “I’m sleeping,” he said, rolling so his back was to me.

“Don’t be boring,” I complained.

“You’re the one who dragged us out to this god-forsaken place to do charity work,” he grumbled at me.

We’d had this conversation a hundred times already, but with us, what was a hundred more?  “You said that I need to change what it means to be the hokage,” I said.

“Okay, but you could change what it means to be hokage somewhere… better.”

“Somewhere better?” I asked with a snort.  “Are the accommodations not to your liking?”

“I’m just saying that helping some podunk little village rebuild from flooding isn’t going to do anything for you politically,” he said, sitting up and running a hand through his hair.”

“Uh, duh,” I said.

He looked at me.

“That’s exactly the kind of hokage I want to be,” I said, smiling happily.  “Someone who helps people for no reason or personal gain.”

“Stellar strategy, I’m sure the Council won’t find a way to back out of your agreement and make someone else hokage.”

“You know you support me one hundred percent,” I said with an easy shrug.

“Maybe one percent.”

“Ninety-nine percent.”

“Zero percent?”

“One hundred and fifty percent!”

Sasuke was shaking his head, but I could see his smile.

I lived for that smile.  “Hey, Sas’?”

“What?”

I looked at him.  I really looked at him.  I wanted to tell him.

“Did your brain break?” he asked.  He stifled a yawn.

“Probably,” I said.

That got a little laugh.  “Go to bed, Naruto.”

“Yeah,” I said, settling into my sleeping bag.  “Good night.”

Sasuke snapped off the light we had hanging in the tent.

I lay there, staring into the dark, and it was driving me crazy.

“Stop,” Sasuke finally grumbled.

“Stop what?” I whispered.

“Whatever you’re doing.”

“Breathing?”

“Yes, stop doing that.”

“Do you want me to die?!” I snipped.

“Why are you so damn loud in the middle of the night?” Sasuke sighed.

“You’re the one wishing death on me!”

“Just get it out, already,” Sasuke said irritably.  “Obviously something is on your mind.”

“No, I don’t think so,” I protested.

“Then why are you all… frenetic?” he asked.

“Who’s frenetic, I’m not frenetic.”

“I can hear your leg bouncing,” he muttered.

I hadn’t realized I’d been doing that, and I quickly stilled my leg.  Then I found that my fingers were tapping against the ground.

“It’s not like you,” Sasuke said quietly.

“Huh?”

“You don’t usually…” he trailed off, thinking over his words carefully.  “You don’t usually keep things from me.”

Why did this man know me better than I knew myself?  “Sorry,” I mumbled.

“I really don’t care.  Just say it or go to sleep,” he said, but I had the feeling that he did actually care.

I opened my mouth and nothing came out.

“I’m going to sleep outside,” Sasuke growled.

“No, you’re not,” I said with a sigh.  “I just… I’m not ready to say it.”

“Well get ready or figure out how to stop crawling out of your skin.”

I’d planned this.  Not consciously, but now I could see how my sneaky subconscious had brought us to this point, alone on a mission just the two of us, sleeping in the same tent like we used to when we were twelve, with no one to interrupt us until the construction started in the morning.  I wanted to tell him.  I needed to tell him.

But should I tell him?

I thought back to the night that Sasuke moved into his own apartment, both of us a little drunk, the gentle touch of his lips to mine.  Then the betrayal in his eyes when I told him that I wasn’t gay.

I wasn’t, but apparently it didn’t matter.  I’d been too young and dumb at the time to realize it.

Sasuke was special.

Maybe I could just tell him that without getting into the whole calling his name while I was with women, and having almost daily sex dreams about him part.

I mean, he probably wouldn’t care, anyway.  That kiss had been like ten years ago, and surely he had moved on since then.  It wasn’t like he… stayed connected with a village he hated just because of me…

It wasn’t like he only smiled for me.  I saw him almost smile at Sakura once.  It was the smallest uptick.  Nothing compared to the crooked smiles he showered me with, but…

“I’m going to slowly choke the life out of you,” Sasuke informed me, suddenly sitting on my chest with a hand wrapped around my throat.

“Uhhh…?” I said.

“You are so fucking annoying,” he ground out, applying light pressure.  “What?  What is it?  Just say it.”

“Well, you’re kinda making it more awkward,” I squeaked out.

“Good,” he growled.  “What did you do?  What stupid thing did you do?  Did you forget to do some important paperwork?  Did you tell Sakura that her hospital clothes make her look like an middle-aged woman after I specifically told you not to?  Did you piss off the Council and they decided to just cancel your whole hokage probation?  Just tell me already.”

“Um, it wasn’t any of that,” I gasped.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, letting up on my throat and sitting back a little.  “You’re still going to be the hokage in three years?”

“Duh.”

His expression relaxed and he gave me one of those smiles that, okay, were only for me.

I felt myself smiling back.

He pinched my cheek, then moved to go back to his sleeping bag.

I caught his hips, pulling him back.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at me.  “You into being sat on?”

“Yes,” I replied without thinking.

“That’s an odd fetish,” he said, his eyes searching mine.

I should just say it.  What could be a more perfect moment than this?  I should definitely just say it.

“Naruto.”

I swallowed.  “I’m.”

He waited.

I nodded my head.

His brow lifted.

“So,” I said.

He tilted his head to the side.

“Good,” I said.

“Did your brain break?” he finally asked.

“Yeah…” I said quietly.  “Can you… come down here?”

Both of Sasuke’s eyebrows shot up.  “Down where…?”

“Next to me,” I said, letting go of his hips.

He looked at me for a moment, then slid down beside me, propping his chin up on his hand as he lay on his side facing me.

I just had to get it out.  I opened my mouth, and then remembered that I needed to get it out, but in a way that wasn’t going to piss Sasuke off.  That’s what kept on silencing me.  “I’ve been confused lately,” I said, deciding to be as honest as possible.

“How is that different from usual?” he asked.

“Are all the little zings really necessary?” I grumbled.

“The way you’ve been dragging this out, yes.”

“Okay, fine,” I said.

“Better be worth it,” he muttered.

“I love you!” I blurted out.

“Okay,” Sasuke said.  “That’s not getting you out of telling me whatever horrible secret you’re hiding.”

“No, that’s the horrible secret,” I explained.

Sasuke let out a sudden bark of laughter.  “What kind of secret is that?”

His sheer good-naturedness told me that he didn’t get what I was saying.  “Sasuke, I’m in love with you,” I tried saying.

A little of the humor left his eyes.  “What’s this about?”

“It’s about me being in love with you,” I said, feeling stupid and small.

“You’re not gay, Naruto,” he said flatly.

“No, I’m not,” I agreed.

Sasuke’s frown deepened.  “I’m a man, Naruto.”

“I’m aware,” I said, trying to exude sincerity.

“Then do you see why what you’re saying is ridiculous?” he asked, sitting up.  His arms crossed over his chest, a physical sign that he was starting to close himself off.

I sat up, too.  “I know it doesn’t make sense, okay?  I’m not gay, and you’re a man, but I love you so much it’s crazy.”

“That’s one word for it.”

“Yeah, it is, because I don’t get it, okay?” I said.  “I don’t know why I feel this way about you, but I do.  And I’ve asked you to do this huge thing and be my partner when I become hokage, but I can’t start off the new Konoha lying to you, yeah?  I have to be honest or this is never going to work, and honestly I’m in love with you.  So.  Yeah.”

Sasuke was staring at me, and definitely not in a good way.

“Sas’…” I tried.

“I fucking hate you,” he whispered.

Oh, fuck.

“You piece of shit,” he said, his voice getting louder.  “You fucking piece of shit.  Don’t you ever fucking say another word about this to me ever again.”

I knew all along that he was going to react badly, but I didn’t really know why he would.  If I asked him why, he was going to react even more badly, so I was kind of stuck just staring at him pathetically.

“Do you hear me?” he growled, grabbing me by my shirt and staring me down.  “Do you understand what I’m saying?” “…no?” I said quietly.

He shook me, then dropped my shirt in disgust, standing up in a crouch in the low tent.  “I need to go.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, trying to get him to stay.

“Fuck your sorry!” Sasuke snapped at me.  “And fuck you,” he added for good measure.

“Do you think I’m joking with you or something?” I asked, not used to being the target of Sasuke’s venom after so many years.  “Do you think I’m not being sincere?”

“Of course you’re not being sincere!” he yelled.  “What kind of straight man tells another man that he loves him?”

“What, just because I’m not gay, I can’t have feelings for you?!” I cried, standing up and crouching in front of him.  A tent was a terrible place to have an argument.

“Yes, Naruto!” he said.  “That’s exactly what it fucking means!  Not being gay means that you are not attracted to men, you dumb shit!”

“Okay, but maybe consider that I’m Sasuke-sexual!” I snapped.

Sasuke opened his mouth but then immediately closed it.  He sat down on his sleeping bag and stared up at me.  “Sasuke… sexual…” he repeated, shaking his head.

“I am…” I tried to assert.

“There’s no such thing as Sasuke-sexual!” he yelled, but he wasn’t as mad anymore, and I felt some of the tension release from my shoulders.

I sat down across from him.  “Well, that’s what Sakura said…”

“Sakura knows about this?”

“Well, I told her about all the sex stuff, so…”

“What.  Sex.  Stuff.”

I could feel my face burning.  “Just sex stuff.  About you.  Um.  Sexy dreams and uh… other stuff.”

“I don’t like it,” he said.  “I don’t like it,” he repeated.  “Naruto, don’t do this to me.  Please.”

“I’m not doing anything to you,” I protested, feeling a little annoyed now.  “I’m telling you how I feel.  That’s more than you’ve ever done.”

He looked like I’d slapped him.  “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“No, Sasuke, I’m not fucking kidding you,” I said irritably.  “You kissed me, and then you ran away.  You acted like it never happened.  And maybe if you had used your goddamn words instead, we could have figured some of this shit out.”

“You told me you weren’t gay!” he yelled, getting mad again.

“Yeah, and it’s pretty fucking weird that a non-gay guy was so cool with his gay best friend kissing him, wasn’t it?!” I snapped.

“You told me you weren’t gay,” he repeated, his voice getting softer.  “You humiliated me.”

I was gobsmacked.  “I humiliated you?”

“I was so sure you felt the same way about me,” he said.  “I was so sure, and then you pushed me away and said you weren’t gay, and I felt so… beneath you.  Like you were looking down on the poor little queer, telling me that it didn’t matter and you would forgive me-”

“I never said that-”

“Oh, okay, then how am I supposed to interpret all your little good-guy speeches about how it wouldn’t affect our friendship, how you still looked at me the same, whatever bullshit you came out with that clearly said that I’d done something wrong, but you were such a great guy that you would just overlook it?”

“That’s not what I meant…” I mumbled feebly.  “You just gave me this look like… I betrayed you, and I kept rambling, trying to make sure you wouldn’t just throw me away…”

“You threw me away,” he muttered.

“Sasuke…”

“So you suddenly want to fuck me now?”

“I…” I trailed off, feeling strange.

“No, really, tell me all about these sex dreams you’ve been having about me after telling me you weren’t gay.”

I was red again.

“Do you picture me with a pussy so you can stomach it?” he growled.

“No...” I said, cringing.  “Sas’, it’s not like that.”

“Then what is it like?”

“Is that the most important thing to fixate on when I’m telling you that I love you?” I asked.  This conversation was getting way off course.

“I just want to understand what a straight man sees in me,” he replied, eyes meeting mine in an unwavering stare.

“Oh, that’s easy,” I said, relaxing.  “You’re strong, you’re smart, you’re nice when you want to be, you’re good at making ramen, you fight for the people you love, you always stand up for what’s right even if it’s hard…”

“…none of those sound like romantic attraction,” Sasuke muttered.

“What, do you want me to tell you how attractive I find you?”

“Honestly, I think you just want to be me and are confusing that with physical attraction,” Sasuke said with a shrug.

I gaped at him.  “Jerk, who would want to be you?!” I snapped.

He smiled at that.  “You.”

“Ohmigod, you are the most narcissistic asshole on the face of this earth!”

He shrugged again.

“Please explain to me how it makes more sense that I want to be you than I want to be in you,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

Sasuke startled at that.

I thought back over what I’d just said carefully.  “Uhhh, I mean… be with you…?”

“Do you even know how gay sex works?” he asked, eyes very carefully not meeting mine.

“I researched it,” I said confidently.

“And you’re just fine with it?” he asked.

I swallowed.  “I… don’t know if I’m ready for everything, but… I’m very interested in some of it.”

“You’re very interested in some of it?” Sasuke scoffed.  “Which parts?  Please do elaborate.”

I was red again.  “Is that what you want to hear?”

“Most definitely.”

“I mean, how much detail…?”

“All the details.”

“All the details?”

“All the details.”

“I mean, do I start with you, um…”

“With me what?” Sasuke asked, clearly starting to feel back in control as he looked me in the eyes.

“Well I guess um… you know… with your mouth…”

“So you’d like to get blown,” Sasuke said, nodding his head.

“I mean… yes…?”

“Interesting, and were you planning on returning the favor?”

I looked at the ground.  “If you wanted me to, I could… try.”

“So really you just want me to suck you off and then you give me a pat on the head for a job well done?”

“You asked me what I was interested in and I told you,” I growled, crossing my arms over my chest.  “This is all new to me, I’m not a professional gay like you.”

Sasuke very slowly raised an eyebrow.

This was already a disaster, and I seemed to be adding more flames to the fire.  “Forget it.  Forget everything I said.”

“Oh, are we just going to pretend that this didn’t happen?” Sasuke asked in that jackass tone of voice of his.

“Yes,” I said.  “We’re going to go to sleep and wake up tomorrow in a world where I never said anything, and then I’m going to tell you in a non-offensive way that I love you, and you will graciously listen to me and shake my hand at the end and agree that you don’t mind me having feelings for you and that you still want to work with me to build the new Konoha.”

He didn’t say anything at first, and I held my breath waiting.

Then I needed air and pulled it in with a loud gasp.

“Idiot,” he grumbled.

I gave him my biggest, roundest puppy dog eyes.

“You’re serious?” he asked, his voice taking on a vulnerable quality.

I nodded my head enthusiastically.

“Okay,” he said, getting back into his sleeping bag.  “Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow!” I agreed, clamoring back into my own sleeping bag.  “So…”

“So?”

“We’re… okay?”

“Well, we’re pretending nothing happened, so we can also pretend that we’re okay,” Sasuke reasoned.

“Saaaaasukeeeeeee,” I complained.  “I’m sorry,” I added.

“Sorry for what?”

“For my behavior for the last… fifteen-ish years.”

“You’re going to need a lot more sorries than that.”

“I’m sorry,” I said, as sincerely as I could.

“Weirdo.”

“I know.”

Sasuke sighed.  Or maybe he was taking a breath.  “Naruto?”

“Yeah?”

“Tomorrow…”

“Mm?”

“When you tell me whatever it has that you have to tell me…”

“Uh-huh?”

“What if I…” he trailed off and was silent.

“Tell me tomorrow,” I said.

“Okay.”

I slept fitfully, constantly waking up to every little noise.  The ground was more uncomfortable than usual, and I found myself constantly shifting and readjusting.

It was barely what could be called morning when I opened my eyes and found Sasuke right in front of me.

“Tell me the thing,” he said quietly.

“I’m in love with you,” I said, still half-asleep but never surer of anything in my life.

“Not just as friends?”

“Definitely not just as friends,” I said, trying to blink my eyes awake.

“Promise?” he asked, looking into my eyes.

“Promise,” I said, looking back and smiling.

He took a breath and shifted closer, then stopped.  His eyes kept staring into mine, asking a silent question.

I didn’t want to misread him, but it seemed like the longer I hesitated, the more anxious his expression got.  I reached out, curling my fingers gently behind his neck and pulling him in until we were sharing air.  “I promise,” I repeated.

“Okay,” he said, his voice soft.

We just breathed together, both of us about to have mutual nervous breakdowns.

“Naruto,” he said, and there were those eyes again.

All I had to do to answer the question…

It was the most tentative brush of lips in the history of brushing lips, but Sasuke endured it silently.

I looked at him.

He looked back at me.

I wanted him to talk to me.  I wanted him to tell me exactly what he expected.  What he wanted.  But in this moment, I knew there was no way that he would expose himself like that.  I had to be the one to take the risks.  I had to be the one to be vulnerable.  And it was scary.  It was really scary, and my breathing was getting more and more erratic, but Sasuke was just looking back at me and waiting, so I knew what I had to do and I kissed him like I meant it.

It was sparks.

It was fireworks.

It was home.

 - 0 -

  Naruto was spread-eagled across our bed like the whole damn thing belonged to him.

I sighed, dropping my travel bag on the floor before giving him a light kick.

He grumbled and shifted over about an inch.

“Uzumaki, you need to move,” I growled, peeling my shirt over my head and tossing it into the hamper.

“But I’m comfy,” he mumbled, smacking his lips sleepily.

“Get comfy somewhere else,” I complained, adding my pants to the hamper and walking over to the dresser.  The room was dark, so I felt along in the drawer with my hand until I found my nightclothes.

Naruto made some incoherent sound that probably meant he had gone back to sleep.

He worked hard every day, and I hated how tired he always was, but I had just traveled eighteen hours straight to get home, and he needed to move his ass over.

Dressed and ready for bed, I gave his bottom a much more significant kick that jarred him enough away from my side of the bed that I could squeeze in.

I don’t know why I bothered, because he immediately rolled right back over, wrapping himself around me.

“Hey,” he said, kissing my shoulder sleepily.  “I missed you.”

I was ready to be annoyed, but our bed was comfortable, Naruto was warm, and it was nice to be home.

“How was your mission?” he hummed into my skin.

“The usual.”

“That’s a pretty crappy mission report.”

“Well, you’re a pretty crappy hokage.”

“What is wrong with you?” he snorted, nudging me until I turned on my side to face him.  “Show your hokage-to-be some respect.”

“No,” I said, which only seemed to make him smile even wider.

Naruto didn’t mind my shit when he knew I didn’t mean it.  He rested his hand against my cheek, grinning dopily.

“I missed you, too,” I finally acknowledged, giving him a chaste kiss at the corner of his mouth.

His face lit up and I found myself being aggressively cuddled.

Our breathing started to even out as we both drifted towards sleep.

In moments like this, our relationship was easy, but when we woke up in the morning, the world would come crashing back in and everything would be complicated again.

“It’s in less than a week,” Naruto said, breaking up the silence.

I breathed in sharply, coming fully awake again.  “Yeah, it is,” I agreed.

“Will you stay home more?”

I couldn’t answer that.

Naruto sighed, kissing the top of my head.  “I need you,” he said quietly.  “I’m not… I can’t do this on my own, ya know?”

“I know,” I said.  I was the one who’d put the responsibility of changing the entire ninja world on his shoulders.  I just found it easier to support his ideals when I was as far away from Konoha as possible.  “I’m here now.”

“…for how long?”

I took a breath, weighing my answer so it didn’t turn into a fight.  “Until you send me on another mission.”

“Okay,” he said, rubbing his cheek against mine.  “Sorry for keepin’ you up, I just… every time I start to fall asleep, my mind starts goin’ a million miles a minute…”

I took his hand that was resting on my hip and laced our fingers together.

Naruto relaxed, some of his nervous energy dissipating.

“You’ll be a great hokage,” I said quietly.

“If I make it to my inauguration without being assassinated…”

“That’s the spirit.”

“…is that why you rushed back here so quickly?” he asked.

“I didn’t rush,” I said, despite how obvious it was that I had.

“Aw, did you wanna proteeeeect me?” Naruto cooed.

“Idiot,” I muttered.  Of course I wanted to protect him.  He had almost as many enemies as I did now after all his campaigns for reform.  He also had just as many loyal allies willing to lay down their lives for him, but try as I might I just couldn’t trust anyone else to watch his back.  I had to be here, making sure that nothing happened to stop Naruto’s becoming the sixth hokage.

He was smiling at me dopily, reading my thoughts clearly.  “Tomorrow morning, I’m gonna totally rock your world, okay?”

I rolled my eyes at that.  “Okay, let me get out my day planner and pencil in a world rocking from 7:00 to 7:02.”

The look on his face was priceless.

“Saaaaasukeeeee,” he whined.

“Go to sleep, Naruto,” I said, squeezing his hand.  I was always being meaner to him than necessary, but he understood.

“I’ll try,” he said, snuggling into me.

Fuck, he was adorable and more than I deserved.

I tended to be insecure about our relationship, and that led to me being an unnecessary asshole.  Our sex life was especially complicated, and we still had to tread lightly sometimes.  If I didn’t like something that we were doing and promptly informed Naruto, he would immediately stop, give me a kiss, and do something different.  If Naruto informed me that he didn’t like something, I took it as a personal insult against myself and my lineage that needed to be avenged immediately.

Naruto dealt with the fact that he was a straight man in a gay relationship better than I did.  ‘Heteroflexible’ he called it.

Not that Naruto was always perfect and kind and understanding.  We fought at times, mostly about the village.  He sometimes forgot to take off his rose-colored glasses and remember what had been done to him by the people claiming to have his best interests at heart.  No matter how many times I tried to convince him that the Third Hokage had neglected him, he refused to hear it.

I wanted Naruto to recognize the wrongs done to him, but that was a losing battle.

Much faster to just remind him that the Third Hokage covered up the slaughter of my family.

Naruto always got pissed off on my behalf.

Maybe one day we’d work out all of our psychological issues, but until then I just wanted him to understand that condemning the atrocities of one’s followers while helping them to cover it all up did not a good leader make.

I don’t know why I worried.  Naruto was already the best hokage Konoha had ever seen, and he hadn’t even officially taken the title yet.  Because in the end, Naruto always did the right thing.

I held him close, listening to his obnoxious snoring.  It lulled me into sleep, my eyes sliding shut.

We didn’t have it all figured it out yet, but we’d figure it out together.

Starting with a world rocking promptly at 7:00, apparently.

I stayed curled up in bed as Naruto shuffled around after, getting read for work.

“You sure you don’t want breakfast or anything?” he asked softly, the mattress dipping under his weight.

I mumbled something that probably resembled “no” and buried myself deeper in the blankets.  I felt the warmth of his hand as he touched my cheek, my eyes staying firmly shut.

“Okay, I’m off to save the world now.”

A little smile twitched at my lips.

“Love you,” he said, leaning in and pressing his lips to my temple.  “Come in before noon with your mission report, or you’re fired!”

My smile got a little wider.  Naruto’s fake power trips were cute, mostly due to how obviously fake they were.  “Like you would ever fire me,” I hummed.

“Try me,” he said, his voice teasing.  He pat my head, fingers running through my hair lingeringly before disappearing.  “See you at eleven fifty-nine.”

I scoffed, because I certainly hadn’t been planning to arrive exactly one minute before the deadline he gave me just to be contrary.  “Bye.”

“Bye!” he called, his voice drifting in from the hallway.

I listened until his steps disappeared and the front door closed.

Naruto had seemed so lost and aimless after the war, never knowing which direction to go in.  Ever since that day in the training field, though, when he forced the Council’s hand to name him officially as the sixth hokage...  Ever since that day, it was like Naruto had finally gotten on the path he was always meant to be on.  He moved with purpose again, his inner light filling him up after being dim for so long.

That light illuminated my own path.

I was still working on myself, trying to sort out the anger and the loss and the helplessness and the longing for revenge that never quite went away, but when I watched Naruto moving forward with no trace of doubt, it was like I could see my own path forward.

Naruto’s face was priceless as Shizune let me into the hokage’s office.

“You’re… early…” he said, glancing at the clock which read, ‘9:01’.

“I like to keep you on your toes,” I said, striding across the room and dumping my mission report on Naruto’s little desk that was pulled up next to Tsunade’s.  I didn’t spare her a glance, because it had long since been established that I only answered to Naruto.

“Consider me toed,” he said, raising his leg over his desk and pointing his toes.

Everyone in the room stared at him.

Naruto laughed his stupid laugh, and I felt myself almost smiling.

This idiot was going to be the hokage in five days, and I would move heaven and earth to make sure he was the greatest hokage Konoha ever saw.

[himbowelsh]

I love your writing! I don't think I have seen him yet, so sweet Carwood Lip please for the Valentine's alphabet, if you have the time 💖

valentines day alphabet  ( accepting! )

A   :   AFFECTION.   how does your muse show affection?

He has a very gentle presence, which allows him to share space with someone without being overwhelming. Lip’s love languages are quality time  ---  he thrives in being around people, actively listening to them and getting to know them  ---  and acts of service. Once he knows them well, he’s able to be there for them, doing little things to help them out when they need it most. Lip is a generous guy to begin with, but he’s at his best when able to do things for others. He’s a giver. While not shy about physical affection, he uses it strategically, more to reinforce his presence than be excessively affectionate.

B   :   BOUQUET.   does your muse like flowers? which ones are their favourite?

He has a special fondness for flowers, in the “I should probably not be left alone to grow any of them myself” way. He enjoys looking at them, and his mother maintained a lovely garden which he helped with on occasion, under her strict supervision. Bouquets are a favorite gift, and he’s likely to show up with a nice one to any special occasion.

C   :   CHOCOLATE.   does your muse like chocolate? which one is their favourite?

He’s not a big fan...  so he’d claim, 'til he spots a bowl of brownie batter, at which point he must be fought off with the nearest ladle.

D   :   DATE.   what is your muse’s ideal date? where / who with / etc?

He wouldn’t mind something simple and quiet  ---  maybe a night at home, where he gets to surprise his partner with a homemade dinner. He’d light some candles, get out the nice silverware, and just enjoy the time with his partner; afterwards, they’d go out onto the porch with mugs of coffee or tea, drinking in the quiet night. He’s also partial to visits to museums. Being surrounded by art gives him a certain sense of peace, an insight into humanity as more than it currently is; that’s something he’d love to share with his partner.

E   :   EMBRACE.   does your muse like hugs? what are their hugs like?

It’s all about the arms, man. We knows this. He had the arms of a bear-faced god, and isn’t afraid to use them. Being hugged by Lip is like curling up by a fire, under your comfiest blanket, with a good book and a warm drink. He makes people feel safe.

F   :   FLIRT.   is your muse good at flirting? how do they flirt?

Shy boy. Flirting is definitely not where he excels, and he’s too guileless to do it properly. Just...  approaching a stranger and winking at them? “Chatting them up”? That’s...  uncomfortable.He’s the sort of guy to buy people drinks at the bar and genuinely not expect anything in return, though it’d be nice if they did. Lip is much more flirtatious once actually in a relationship  ---  he jokes and teases in a charming, restrained way that’s utterly him.

G   :   GIFT.   is your muse good at gift - giving or do they struggle to get it right?

He’s a very thoughtful gift giver, who takes the time to observe what people need, and genuinely listens to them when they talk about things they’re looking for. Unconsciously, he keeps mental lists of gift ideas for all the people in his life, and refers to them whenever a birthday or holiday comes up. He’s not excessive with his gifts, but they’re always just right. (Except when it comes to clothes. He should never be allowed to pick out clothes for other people, especially women’s clothing.)

H   :   HEART.   is your muse quick or slow to give their heart away?

He cares for a lot of people, but Lip is always cautious; his heart is a carefully guarded thing, and once he trusts someone with it, he wants to know that they’re the right person. His heart is won gradually, over a period of coming to know and love a person better. 

I    :   I LOVE YOU.   does your muse find ‘i love you’ easy or hard to say?

He finds it very easy, as soon as he knows it within his own heart. Lip could absolutely be the first one to say it in a relationship  ---  and wouldn’t be discouraged if his partner didn’t immediately say it back, because everything comes in it’s own time. He’d rather it be natural than forced in the moment. Lip doesn’t say it constantly, but every time he does, the words carry twice their original meaning.

J   :   JEALOUSY.   does your muse get jealous in a relationship?

While certainly not intimidated easily, Lip has a jealous streak he goes to great efforts to smother. It’s not gentlemanly, it’s not always sensible, and certainly not something to make a scene in public over...  but he might pointedly capture his partner’s attention if he feels it straying, and try to discuss things in private afterwards. He doesn’t like this part of himself, but he can get a bit defensive sometimes.

K   :   KISS.   is your muse a good kisser? why / why not?

Lip...  thinks he’s a worse kisser than he is. He underestimates himself. Sometimes overthinking gets the better of him; he’s hyperconscious of where his hands are, what his partner’s body is doing, how they’re responding, whether he’s being gentlemanly or over-forceful...  Lip’s kisses tend to be restrained and respectful, not assuming anything. The farthest he’ll go is sucking on his partner’s lip a little, just to test their response. Whatever response they give, and whatever lead they take, he’ll go from there. Given the proper cues,

L   :   LOVE.   who does your muse love?

His mother and brother, absolutely; his friends, completely; his neighbors, because he’s the sort of guy who knows his neighbors’ names, and helps Old Mrs. Huston down the street with her groceries every week; and his partner, with all his heart, if he were to have one.

M   :   MOONLIGHT.   is morning or night a more romantic setting?

He’s at his most sappy romantic mid-morning, when the sun’s high in the sky and the world is finding its rhythm. Getting to spend a quiet morning in with his partner sounds like heaven.

N   :   NAUGHTY.   what is your muse like in bed?

He’s willing to follow his partner anywhere they want to take him; Lip can never be comfortable until he’s sure his partner is, and is sure of what they want. Now, if they want him to be dominant, he’ll do it gladly...  but he’ll never be rough. He’s very into hearing his partner talk during sex, mostly because he wants to keep tabs and know how they’re doing; but if his partner’s the one who seizes control, Lip runs out of words very quickly. Harsh breathing, moans even when he tries to hold them back, eyes squeezed shut to cling to his self-control... into hand holding during sex.  He’s a very physical lover, with a lot of stamina; sometimes leaves bruises without meaning to and feels guilty afterwards  (aftercare with Lip is like going to a spa). Occasionally he enjoys music to set the mood, or even candlelight, but Lip’s versatile. If his partner’s up for it, he can rumble pretty much anywhere.

O   :   ODE.   does your muse have a way with words?

He’s a surprisingly skilled writer, and can be quite eloquent when he puts his mind to it. Though plainspoken by nature, Lip’s written a few poems for his private collection, and would definitely try his hand at love poetry for his partner. They’re not half-bad.

P   :   PARTNER.   what does your muse look for in a partner? looks / personality?

Lip kind of wants someone who can keep him on his toes a bit. For as steady as he is, he’s drawn to unpredictable people, with a healthy sense of humor. Someone who appreciates quiet, but knows exactly when to fill it; someone who isn’t afraid of responsibility or commitment. A hard worker; someone who can carry an intelligent conversation, and is naturally a thinker. If they share common interests, like literature/museums/engineering, he’d be absolutely delighted. Above all else, Lip’s drawn to people with beautiful smiles, even if they don’t show it off that often.

Q   :   QUESTION.   would your muse ask the big question or expect their partner to?

Call him traditional (it’s valid, cause he is) but Lip would like to be the one to pop the question. As soon as he decides that, yes, he wants to spend the rest of his life with this person, Lip’s next step is to evaluate  ---  do they feel the same way? He spends a while overthinking this question before finally deciding to just take the leap and buy a ring. The proposal will come in a quiet moment, when he and his partner are both feeling equally at peace. If his partner beats him to it, he’ll be surprised, of course...  but either way, the end result is the same. If it means spending

R   :   ROMANCE.   is your muse a romantic or a cynic?

He wishes he were more romantic...  but, unfortunately, practicality is ingrained in this man’s bones. He’ll definitely surprise his partner with bouquets on occasion, and thinks very carefully about gifts, but he’s not the ‘spontaneous romantic adventure’ sort.

S   :   SWEETHEART.   did your muse have a childhood sweetheart?

He had a few middle school crushes that never went anywhere; that’s as far as Little Lip’s love life ever went. He bore a lot of responsibility from a young age, so never really had time to mess around.

T   :   TRUE LOVE.   does your muse believe in true love?

He...  would have to see it firsthand to believe in it, but he believes in individual cases of it. Like, his mother and father  ---  that was true love. Lip saw the way they looked at each other, so there’s not a doubt in his mind. He doesn’t believe it’s everywhere, or even common, but in certain cases true love definitely exists. Maybe it’s out there for him, too...  he hopes so.

U   :   UNREQUITED.   has your muse had their heart broken?

In a romantic relationship? Not...  not really. Lip’s got a strong heart. It’s endured a lot, and can endure more.

V   :   VALENTINE.   how does your muse feel about valentine’s day?

He’s a very proper “dinner date and a box of chocolates” type, so would go out of his way to do something nice for a partner, but doesn’t make much of the day himself.

W  :   WEDDING.   would your muse get married? why / why not?

Yes, this is absolutely something he wants! Lip’s given it a lot of thought, and the idea of raising his own family appeals greatly to him; he lost his father at such a young age that he really wants to be a constant, supportive presence in his childrens’ lives. And, more than anything, he wants to spend a lifetime with someone he loves. That would make any future struggles and past strifes worth it.

X   :   XOXO.   does your muse use / like pet names?

Very conservative with them. “Sweetheart” or dimunitives of someone’s name is probably as far as he’d go.

Y   :   YOURS.   does your muse get protective easily?

Again, yes, and he doesn’t like it about himself! Of course, Lip would move mountains when the people he loves need help  ---  there’s no shame in that  ---  but when it comes to his partner, he can get territorial. Seeing someone threaten his partner is one of the few things he’ll get angry about, and a pissed off Carwood Lipton is not something anyone wants to confront firsthand.

Z   :   ZZZ.   how many people has your muse slept with?

Not a lot. He went to college for a short time, and that was really where he was able to let loose; while still a diligent student, he went to a few parties and met a few girls. So, by the time of the war, maybe three partners? Enough that he’s not nervous in bed, and has a good idea what goes where.

[buckyownsmylife]

t r e a c h e r o u s - chapter iii

for general warnings, author’s notes and disclaimer, please go to the fic’s masterlist

if you’re interested, you can join my taglist

A/N for this chapter: we’re in the smut, finally! From this chapter until the end, it’s just a sucession of smut smut and smut, pwp really. Hope you guys enjoy it!

Chris’ P.O.V.

“What are the rules?” I asked Sebastian, my gaze fixed on the sinful woman sitting on the bed before me. I had never felt this attraction to Y/N before. Sure, I knew she was hot and desired by men worldwide, but having met her when she already was with Sebastian, I never really allowed myself to pay much attention to her, choosing to focus on the fact that she was so young, instead. 

She was forbidden territory. That should have been enough to keep my wandering thoughts away. But everything had changed since Sebastian came to me for advice. Since that day, I had found myself wondering how he could ignore her allure, not feeling in the slightest the sexual grip his girl had. It had been so hard for me to ignore it and there he was, completely oblivious to it. 

After our talk in the bar, I finally allowed myself to think of her that way. And that very same night, I dreamt of her. I had her spread out on my bed, under me, and I pounded her like the dirty little whore I finally allowed myself to imagine she was. I mean, I had heard her songs. I saw the way she moved on stage. There was no way that girl didn’t like to be fucked hard and the fact that she had begged Sebastian to relent and try anything necessary to give her what she needed was only proving my thesis.

And by God did she look the part. Her breasts were spilling out from the top of the little black lace lingerie she had chosen to wear and despite the fact that she looked at me with the most innocent doe eyes I had ever seen, I couldn’t ignore the image I had briefly caught of her ass on the tiny excuse of a panties she had put on. 

I licked my lips, eager to finally get my hands on her.

“I don’t know. Whatever, man.” Sebastian interrupted my train of thought and I had to think for a few seconds to realize that he was answering my question. I’d forgotten I’d even asked it in the first place. “I trust you. You do whatever you feel like it’s appropriate, whatever she agrees you can do. I think it’s the only way for this to work.” And with that, he found a spot in one of the chairs in one corner of the room, crossing his ankle over the knee and settling his piercing gaze on us. 

Turning my attention back to the woman waiting for me, I noticed she shivered as I approached her on the bed. Cautiously, I let my fingers caress the skin of her arm all the way to her jaw, smiling to myself as goosebumps raised on the path I had traced, loving the way she rested her head on my open palm as I took her face in my hand.

“You okay there, princess?” I asked, my face mere inches apart from her as I searched her eyes for any signs of hesitance there. I couldn’t find any, only a lust so powerful that almost took my breath away.

“I’m okay,” she whispered, her eyes never travelling away from mine. Her breathing was coming out from her lips in short pants, and I absentmindedly realized she must have been really desiring me for her body to be reacting that way.

I forced myself to be reasonable, remembering she hadn’t had anyone touch her in a sexual manner since before she started dating Sebastian. This didn’t mean she had any special feelings towards me, one of her closest friends, only that she really needed to get laid.

“I’m going to kiss you now, okay?” I asked, briefly glancing at Sebastian, almost waiting for him to jump up and stop this, at least to say that it was a far too personal move, but nothing. He truly was about to let me do whatever I wanted to his girl, I realized. 

Oh well. I wasn’t about to lose this opportunity. Sitting down by her side, I carefully wrapped my hand around the back of her neck, feeling how tense her muscles were under my fingers. “Relax, babygirl,” I whispered, leaning into her and pulling her gently to me. 

I tried to ignore how electrified I felt the moment that our lips touched. Such a simple gesture, still so pure, and yet a carnal need I had never felt before suddenly arose from the depths of my being, urging me to swallow her whole. I separated from her for a bit, trying to catch my breath and control my emotions, but her concerned eyes made me remember what had brought me here. This was a girl who was struggling with her own self-esteem, thinking that there was something wrong with her for her boyfriend to not be able to fuck her, and by restraining myself, I was probably making her think that I wasn’t really interested in her.

So I let go of my carefully constructed control, pulling her to me once more, for a kiss that was all tongue and teeth and pure, unbound desire. I could think it was only from me, but the truth was that I felt her hands roaming my chest and the warmth that emanated from her was unbelievable. When we pulled away to catch our breaths, her pupils were dilated to the point I could barely see the color of her eyes.

So I kissed her once more, carefully laying her down on the mattress as I positioned myself between her legs. By now, I had completely forgotten about the man seated on the other side of the room, my best friend. I could only focus on the goddess in front of me, the way she tasted, how she felt underneath me. One of my fingers teased the edge of her bra, making her release the sweetest little breathless gasp as I slowly went to tease her nipple over the lace still covering it.

“Can I take this off?” After her nod, I did just so, briefly remembering Sebastian was watching us as I threw the undergarment his way. Luckly, he seemed to have thought that I had thrown it directly for him, and he caught it with a chuckle.

I tried to forget about his presence again. I thought it would be hard, but then her breasts came into view and my mind could only focus on her. I slowly rubbed her nipples with my thumbs, our eyes meeting as I silently asked if it was okay to continue. When she once again nodded, I didn’t hesitate to envelop her hardened bud with my mouth.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

It was hard not to moan at the simple sight of Chris trying not to smile at my instinctive reaction to chase his mouth by arching my back. That was something I never thought I’d get to see in my life. This was my boyfriend’s best friend, for God’s sake.

Still, Sebastian was the last thing in my mind as Chris swirled his tongue around my nipple, cautiously sucking it into his mouth. I wanted to scream. God, it had been so long. It felt so good to feel the touch of a man on my skin again. And the way Chris was touching me… It was like he really desired me. It wasn’t love, no, but I’d been frustrated for so long. This passion would serve just fine.

Chris continued with his kisses over my belly after he gave my other breast the same treatment he had given the first one. His kisses were wet, he tasted my skin as he went further down, until his lips danced just over my underwear. This time, he didn’t ask, opting simply to connect his eyes to mine and see if there was resistance before pulling it from my body and throwing it away. 

He returned his spot between my legs, but his face was now eye-level with my glistening pussy. I watched as he licked his lips, his attention now clearly fixated on the task at hand, and I tried not to shiver as he softly ran the palms of his big hands on the inside of my thighs.

The first lick was torture. He did it so carefully, only testing the waters, making sure to check my reaction. But the thing was, that simple touch was enough to awaken that part of me that I had put to sleep, in an effort to save my relationship with Seb. That one movement went straight to my brain and then I was nothing but a puddle of red hot passion, desperately in need to feel pleasure running through me.

And Chris noticed.

So he immediately latched onto my little nub and sucked, eventually going down to slurp on the wetness pouring out of my hole before coming back to languidly lap on my clit again. It didn’t take long for him to bring me to the edge, and when he noticed it by the way the muscles of my thighs quivered and I forcefully took a hold of his hair to keep him against my pussy, he pushed one finger into me and started thrusting, throwing me off the cliff of desire completely.

I had to bite my tongue so I wouldn’t scream his name.

Looking down, I noticed that Chris had been watching my reactions with a predatory glint in his eyes. It took my breath away. With one last kiss right over my clit, he started to climb up my body until he was hovering just over me once more.

“I wish I could take time with you,” he whispered before reaching for a condom I’d left on the bedside table. I didn’t have a lot of time to ponder about what he meant, because then he was pushing inside of me.

My mouth fell open at the feeling of him invading me. Once again, I’d never thought I would get to experience this. I held him tightly by the shoulders, terrified that he would second guess this moment and leave. Because at that second, I didn’t want to remember what it was like to live without him inside of me.

Chris kissed my cheek, my jaw, until he reached the crook of my neck while he waited for me to adjust to his size. Only when I tried to force him to move did he actually do so, but not without hiding his face against my skin, his hands finding mine and forcefully securing them against my head. 

It was a gesture far too personal for something that was supposed to be only sex.

His hips were the only thing moving, and I felt the way his mouth fell open against my skin as he started to thrust into me with all he had. I was being effectively fucked into the mattress where I was used to laying with my boyfriend, by someone who wasn’t my boyfriend.

Once again, it took everything in me not to moan Chris’ name out loud.

He fucked me so good, I was seeing stars behind my closed eyelids. And the only reason why I was keeping my eyes shut was because I was scared of meeting Chris’, scared of what I would find there and how it would make me feel. Of what it would bring out of me.

He might have thought the same, because he kept his head safely hidden in the crook of my neck, whispering my name so lightly it was impossible for Sebastian to hear over the sounds of Chris’ cock slipping in and out of my wet pussy. His horse voice was enough to bring me to that delicious edge again, and when he met me there, one of his hands came up to pull on my nipple while he bit on my shoulder to suffocate his own scream of release.

But he covered his teeth with his lip, mindful to not leave any marks on a body that didn’t belong to him. Still, that bit of pain was precisely what I needed to cum around him at the same time I felt him filling up the condom. Then we just stood there, catching our breaths for a moment, uncertain of how to behave around each other now, especially since Sebastian was watching.

Seb’s P.O.V.

One thing was sure, after that little show, I didn’t know if I was more horny or jealous, but the fact was: I was horny. And for the first time, I felt the pressing need to bury myself inside of my girlfriend.

“Chris…” I started, rising up from my seat. My friend immediately got out of the bed, struggling to look for his clothes. “You know where the bathroom is, right?” I continued, but my eyes were fixated on Y/N, who looked slightly out of breath, still spread out in bed. He didn’t say anything, but I assumed he nodded, and before long, it was just my girlfriend and I in our shared bedroom. “Baby.” I leaned down next to her, caressing her head to call her attention to me. “Do you think you can handle one more round?”

Her eyes grew big as she stared at me in surprise.

“You mean…?” Grinning, I nodded.

“Yeah.” She nodded slowly, her eyes traveling from mine to the bulge barely contained in my jeans. “I can handle one more round.”

“Let’s do it. I can’t wait to be inside of you.”

[onenerdtwonagas]

Hot take: The first time Orpheus attempts an intimate moment with Uriah, he’s uncharacteristically shy and nervous. He just can’t help himself; he enjoys the warmth of Uriah’s body as he sits close far too much to resist leaning over and kissing his cheek. Uriah is, of course, flustered, but when Orpheus mumbles an equally awkward apology, his expression shifts into a blush and a smile.

“You don’t...have to be afraid to do that, y’know? That is, w-we kissed more than that when you told me you loved me,” Uriah reminds.

“Ah. Yes, I suppose we did.”

Orpheus pauses.

“May I try again?”

His face is burning, but Uriah nods. Something between a gasp and a squeak escapes him as Orpheus easily pulls him into his lap, his tail curling once around his waist, and one clawed hand gently touching his face. The naga leans close but doesn’t press his lips to Uriah’s skin right away. Instead, he brushes their cheeks together, and softly purrs into his ear with a nuzzle.

When he tilts his face to kiss Uriah’s cheek, there’s more strength behind it, but no roughness. Orpheus is still soft, still careful, fully aware that his body is several times stronger than Uriah’s. His tail flinches slightly, and Uriah notices it hasn’t squeezed him once, as if he’s scared to. It flexes ever so slightly when Uriah begins to stroke it, tracing the midnight scales his fingertips, but remains still, restrained.

“It’s okay,” Uriah whispers, leaning his face against Orpheus’ as the naga purrs again. “You can hold me.”

“I don’t want to hurt you. You’re so much smaller and weaker than me. I wouldn’t forgive myself if I injured you.”

“I know, but I trust you.”

Uriah’s hands cradle Orpheus’ handsome face, and in a moment of boldness, Uriah presses their lips together. He traces the strong line of Orpheus’ jaw back to his beautiful silver hair, stroking his fingers through and bringing his sweetheart closer. Seconds pass and Orpheus parts Uriah’s lips with his own, his hands also combing through Uriah’s hair. He forgets for a moment and his tail cinches around the human’s waist. The gentle gasp from Uriah startles him, and he begins to pull away, but Uriah’s hands hold him close.

“No. No, it’s okay, I promise,” he reassures. “It didn’t hurt.”

“But I—“

“It’s okay,” Uriah repeats, soft and sure. He strokes his thumbs over Orpheus’ cheekbones. “I liked it.”

“You did?”

“Y-Yeah.”

His face feels hot again, and Orpheus cocks his head slightly, watching his eyes. He slowly squeezes the coil around Uriah again, testing, waiting to see how the human reacts. There’s no sign of pain, no struggling. If anything, Uriah just looks shy again. Softer. Orpheus decides to take his experiment a little further, bringing a second coil up and around his middle. He feels Uriah shiver, but nothing more, not until he carefully tightens it until it’s just as snug as the first. The quiet sound that comes out of Uriah interests him.

“How is that, sweetheart?” he asks, tracing Uriah’s jaw.

“It...i-it’s nice.”

“Just ‘nice?’ Nothing else?”

He shifts both coils and Uriah gasps. His hands flinch where they rest on Orpheus’ shoulders. The naga smiles, leaning close and letting Uriah hide his face against his skin, his own hands stroking over the uncovered portions of Uriah’s back. His lips press against his neck, drawing a moan from the man in his arms.

“This does something for you, doesn’t it? How sweet.”

“Don’t tease me,” Uriah mumbles, wrapping his arms around Orpheus’ neck.

“I mean it. You’re adorable,” Orpheus purrs. “I love those sounds of yours.”

The coils shift again, scales brushing against skin as Uriah’s shirt is pulled and pushed beneath them. He breathes deeper as Orpheus’ lips and curious hands press in to his skin. The warmth inside keeps growing, until it’s more than Uriah can stand. One long kiss on his neck and an unexpected stroke from the naga’s tail causes Uriah to moan louder than he intends, and it takes both of them by surprise.

“Is this too much right now, Uriah?”

“U-Umm...I... Maybe?”

“I’d strip you bare if you let me,” Orpheus confesses, the claws of one hand toying with the back of Uriah’s shirt. “I’m curious about you. I want to feel you, know what it’s like with you—“

“O-O-Orpheus!”

“But not if you don’t want me to,” he finished, pulling back so he could see Uriah’s face. His smile was gentle, if not also a little longing. He kisses Uriah’s cheek, then the other, and then his forehead.

“I won’t force you if you aren’t ready.”

Uriah stares up at him, still very much aware of the warmth and pleasure Orpheus instills in him. His body certainly isn’t complaining, and he isn’t concerned that Orpheus would hurt him. If anything, he worries Orpheus would be too concerned about hurting him to perform properly—as embarrassing as the thought is for him. That, and they’re still so new to each other.

“Maybe—“ A part of him hates saying no. Really, truly hates it. The pleasure he felt just moments ago is still fresh in his mind. “—we should take it slow? So you aren’t worried about being too rough when we, um...w-when we get to that?”

Orpheus looks visibly relieved. His coils loosen, and his hands smooth Uriah’s shirt back into place.

“I really am worried I’ll harm you, somehow,” he sighs. “You feel so fragile. Not that I mind, I kind of like that, actually, but I don’t want to bring you pain. I want to be a good lover to you.”

Uriah mentally swears at himself for the flurry of images that came to mind, all of them very enticing. Clearly he feels a little starved in some areas of his life. But there’s a right way to do this with Orpheus, and he wants to take it.

He swallows down his urges and leans in with his arms around Orpheus, smiling.

“We’ll get there.”

[daemongal]

A B C, easy as one two V! (Part 9)

Hey again! We’re almost done with these now and today we’ll cover U and V (only two but I wanted to get some content out for ya’ll). NSFW ahead!

You can find previous entries to this series from my [masterlist]!

______

U = Unfair 

V’s fingers retreated from your heat once more as you groaned in disappointment once more, your body aching to be touched but not getting enough stimulation to take you over the edge like you so desperately needed.

“Come ooooooon V!” You whined, throwing your head back against the pillows and rattling your arm restraints against the headboard. “How wasn’t that good enough? It was pretty much word for word.”  

In hindsight, you very much regretted your decision of asking V to be your private tutor. You thought given his extensive knowledge and interest in poetry that he’d help you study and memorise the poems needed for your test in a few days. When he said he would tutor you on a reward-based system before crashing his lips into yours, you could do nothing but accept his offer. Once your wrists were restrained however, that was a different story.

“’Pretty much word for word’ will not get you the grade you so rightly deserve my sweet. Until you have recited it precisely as written, there’ll be no reward for you; it is as we agreed.” You sighed, face contorting into a pout.

“Well, if you didn’t have your tongue half way down my throat when you asked maybe I would have tweaked the terms of our agreement slightly.” V chuckled in response, fingers grazing your core once more as your whole body shuddered.

“Now, once again from the top.” You cleared your throat, breath hitching as his fingers started to slowly press against your entrance.

“Ah, sunflower weary of time, who countest the steps of the sun; seeking after that sweet golden cli-ahh-me,”  

Your voice stuttered as a single finger pushed into you slowly, your body shivering in anticipation.  

“where the t-traveller’s journey is done; w-where the youth pined away with desire-ahh.”

His finger curled, pressing against your walls exactly where you needed it. Your back arched and your voice broke at his finger kneading intently against your insides.

“You’re doing exquisitely so far, love. Now, please continue.” You fought to keep your eyes open and your thoughts coherent as your legs spasmed reflexively against the sheets. You gulped and took a deep breath.

“a-and the pale virgin shrouded in s-snow, arise from th-their graves and ahh!”  

A second finger joined the first, the pace quickening as you gripped the headboard to ground yourself. Sweat began to trickle from your brow as your eyes fluttered shut, only to reopen in shock a moment later as teeth grazed your ear.

V had moved himself up over you in the moment when your concentration lapsed, his head how resting in the crook of your shoulder, breath against your neck.

“Almost there love; you’re so close.” His deep voice in your ear sent your world spiralling as his expert fingers toyed with your insides perfectly. You were close in more ways than one but you knew you needed to finish the recital; you couldn’t take any more denial.

“a-arise from their g-graves and aspire, where my S-sunflower wishes to go-oooooh!”  

His thumb pressed against your clit, circling it in time with the thrusts of his hand. Your back arched as a question remained on the tip of your tongue.

“Th-there, I did it r-right. C-can I...please?” Your voice was raspy as you gasped for breaths, his pace slowing momentarily, holding you on the brink torturously.

“Hmmm...” V hummed against your ear, before running his tongue up the outer shell. “it sounded divine, love. I couldn’t have recited it better myself.” His quickened his pace again, pushing you back towards your high, his curled fingers pumping in and out of you, his thumb brushing against you’re engorged clit before eventually, he threw you over the edge.

“Ahhhhh, V!” You moaned his name as you reached your peak, the pleasure washing over you as you pushed your head back against the pillow. Your thighs squeezed his hand as his fingers guided you gradually through the waves before your body collapsed, legs dropping to the side.  

V reached up and unclasped your wrists, holding them lightly and pressing his lips gently against the red marks left behind, before lowering them to the bed at your side.  

“Let me... let me tell you one thing.” You started breathlessly. “I-I won’t be forgetting that poem anytime soon.” You giggled, your body feeling giddy from the afterglow. “You’re an excellent tutor V.” He leaned on one elbow on his side, fingers tracing light patterns against your skin, eyes glancing over your body adoringly.  

“Oh the work was all yours my love. You have too much self-doubt.” You looked over to meet his gaze, a puzzled look on your face. He chuckled once more at your expression. “You already knew the poem, love. I merely helped you master it.”  

“W-wait... what?!” You stared at him as a lopsided smirk spread up his cheek.  

“You already knew the words love. You only believed that you didn’t. By the fifth time, you knew that you had recited it correctly, I only wished to instil that confidence in you.” Your mouth dropped open as the realisation hit you.

“You mean every time you told me it was wrong you were... lying?”

“Teasing is the word, love. If you wish for me to be honest...” Without warning V flipped you onto your stomach, pinning your hands once more above your head as he kneeled over your legs. He leaned his face down to yours, pressing his hips and hardened arousal against your rear, lips touching against your ear once more.

“... I was enjoying your impassioned recital so much, I wished for it to never end.”

V = Volume 

“Ahh, V. Mmmff.” V’s hand covered your mouth, muffling the sounds that you couldn’t hold back.  

Nero grumbled in his sleep from the futon at the other side of the room as V stopped moving his hips momentarily. The 3 of you had decided it would be best to rest at an abandoned hotel not far from where your most recent job was and wait until morning to rendezvous with Nico.  

You and V had been seeing each other secretly for a while now, but thought it would be best to keep it to yourselves for the time being until the current shitstorm has passed.

“Hush love. We don’t want to be getting caught now do we?” His words were whispered against your ear as he held your body still against his. You took a few deep breaths as you shook your head sheepishly.  

“It’s your fault.” You muttered quietly into his hand. He began to move his hips again suddenly, his pace slow to avoid causing too much movement, but the angle hitting into you perfectly. You could feel every inch of him as he slid in and out of you with smooth, deep thrusts.  

He was spooning you from behind, both of you on your sides as his hips hit against your ass with each thrust. His lips were against your ear, breathing heavily and whispering sweet nothings to you in between breaths.

“Oh you always take me so well, my sweet. It’s a shame you cannot let out your voice, it is not my desire to muffle your wonderful song.” You let out a gasp as he pushed his cock into you more harshly, the movement of his hips becoming stronger as your body moved slightly with each thrust.

His fingers slipped in between your lips as they opened causing a spark of arousal to shoot through you. V couldn’t hold back a groan a he held you tight, moving your body into his own to meet each thrust as you closed your lips around the digits in an attempt to hold the moans building in your throat as you approached your peak.  

He pulled out of you suddenly, removing his hand from your mouth and using it to pull on your hip.

“Turn over please love.” You were happy to oblige, flipping onto your other side. He lifted one of your legs, placing himself in between them as you wrapped your arms around his torso and your legs around his hips. Quickly, he seated himself back in you, shuffling to move closer before beginning his movements again.

From the new position, you were able to pull yourself to meet each of his thrusts, allowing for more movement as you quickly closed in on your peak again. With how much the sheets were shuffling over your bodies, if Nero woke up there’d be no mistaking what you were both getting up to, which just made it all the more thrilling to you.  

“V... I-I'm close.” Your breathing was ragged as you pressed your forehead against his.

“A-as am I love. P-please, your lips; or I fear I will w-wake him.” You grabbed the back of his head and pulled him into a heated kiss, mouths open and tongues pressed together. You moaned against his lips as his thrusts became quicker and more erratic, driving you closer and closer to the edge.

With a few more deep thrusts, V moaned into your mouth and tensed as he spilled his seed inside of you, the action being the last thing to push you over the edge as you clung to him, his arms around your shoulders tightening as you rode out your highs together, muffled moans being caught in each other's mouths.

You slowly pulled your lips away, grabbing a few heavy breaths, pressing your forehead to V’s as he did the same. Your bodies both stiffened as you heard shuffling from the futon, freezing in place as you waited for any sign he was awake.  

“Mmm not deadweight Dante, fuck you...” He muttered under his breath followed by light snores as you both sighed in relief before chuckling, running your hands through V’s hair, upset at the thought of having to de-tangle your bodies.  

He pulled out of you, leaving an empty sensation behind before pulling you closer and cradling you in his arms, lulling you to sleep with soft motions of his fingers against your skin and his quiet rhythmic breaths.

_______

Poem was “Ah, Sunflower” by William Blake :) Next part should be the last. 

Just FYI, I may be skipping the letter X because I am stumped for what to do with the prompt X-ray and I don;t know what else starts with X that I could write around.... =/

Thanks for reading!!

[sailorshadzter]

here’s me compiling all of my thoughts on episode 1 of season 8!! or at least the thoughts i deemed important enough lmao. big focus on jonsa, political jon, and the starks in general. 

under the cut for SPOILERS + length. 

shout out to all of the amazing content creators out there who have already gif’d this episode. ya’ll are amazing!

anyways, here we go! ps. things could be out of chronological order, sorry lol

lets jump right in with dany and jon arriving at winterfell. i really enjoyed the call back to season 1 bran scrambling up as high as he could to watch robert baratheon & company arrive. 

we have them riding in among dany’s army, looking quite like the royal “couple” they want us to believe they are. dany doesnt look particularly interested to even be there and i think it’s because she’s upset at how everyone is looking at her. jon reminds her that the north isnt easy to impress, that they dont look kindly at foreigners. this isnt pleasing to her. dany has to be loved, by everyone. she cant stand thinking not everyone is on her side. in her mind they have to support her because she’s the queen. 

but she’s not queen, not yet at least. 

next comes the dragons. 

the northerners run, some screaming in fear, others just stumbling in an attempt to find shelter from the dragons that fly overhead. and just look at dany’s face. look at her! what a smug little smile, i hope she enjoys it because she’s got a lot coming to her this season.

i hate this, i just want everyone to know. i still like dany but this arrogant, mocking girl is driving me insane and it’s only episode 1. what little bit of likeness i had for her will fade real fast at this rate. she’s glad the people fear her dragons and thus fear her. she knows the northerners probably will never come around to her and bend so she’s going to get them on her side the only way she knows how: her dragons. 

lets be real- dany has nothing on her own. she’s nothing but a pretty face with a cold heart capable of dark, brutal things. but what if there werent any dragons? what would she be without them? who would fear her then? sure, she’s got a big ass army... but armies can be beaten. armies can be led astray by their own leaders doing. so yeah, she’s got an army but in the end, thats not foolproof. but dragons? those are pretty damn foolproof (unless you send your ~romantic interest~ off on a suicide mission that ends up costing you one of said dragons). she’s going to try and coerce everyone in the north through fear and it might work on the common folk, but wait til she meets the Starks.

yeah, do these girls look afraid?

not at all.

youre a man. almost. 

 i low key teared up at their reunion. it was sweet. plus it was nice to see bran in a more human moment. he’s always so robotic, i thought it was nice to hear him joke a little. 

as jon is looking at bran, you can see the moment he realizes sansa is looking at him. he pulls back from bran and turns to her (wow she looks beautiful, i cant even get over that). 

(gif by @stark)

sansa opens her arms to jon and i have to admit... the hug felt almost lackluster... at first. once i watched it a second and third time, i started seeing the things i didnt see the first time. 

for one thing- it was so amazing in the trailer because we could see jon’s face. kit is so incredible at his facial expressions and you knew exactly what jon was feeling the moment he saw sansa. with sansa, she’s very subdued- but its definitely done on purpose. obviously, she’s happy to see jon but she’s angry with him too. and dozens of people are there watching them, including this queen he’s brought with him. she has to be careful. 

(gif by @stark)

this instant, ever since i saw the trailer, ive thought jon whispered something to her. that’s why her eyes immediately flick up and pin their focus on dany who is standing just across the courtyard. we dont hear jon say anything but that doesnt mean he doesnt. what i find interesting about this is how in the episode, we’re shown sansa’s face and her emotional reactions to whats happening, but we dont see jon’s. in the trailer, it cuts to sansa’s eyes as soon as jon reaches her embrace, so we never see jon’s face in this scene. meaning, we dont see his lips ever move. i still want to believe he whispers something to her, but i almost feel like sansa would have referenced it later in the episode when they speak privately. but, you never know! 

next we have jon introducing sansa to dany, which as we all suspected, did not go well. 

as dany walks up, she’s smiling, her tone charming. her eyes are wide and she looks soft- she’s good at this. notice how no one in the courtyard moves, no one kneels or even bows in dany’s presence as they had once done for robert baratheon. this is not their queen. 

i literally laughed as dany said this. 

she’s trying desperately to come across as likable. she knows most of the north won’t bow to her without the backing of this girl and while she has her dragons to instill fear, she probably does want sansa to like her. she’s in love with her “brother” after all. they’d be sisters, so they should get along, right? 

wrong. 

sansa sees right through her. she’s good at finding a liar- she’s spent her whole life around them. learning from them, the best of them. you cant lie or manipulate sansa stark. not anymore. 

(gif by @cptainsrogers)

whew boy, that’s the face of someone who’s pissed. how quickly she changes!! as soon as sansa speaks, she loses her smile and blinks and she breathes in. she’s trying to restrain herself and keep a calm, cool composure. but its written all over dany’s face here- she’s not happy. 

again, im reminded that this is a woman who cant be told no and who doesnt like when someone isnt falling over themselves to please her. sansa is clearly not impressed with dany and she’s not afraid to let her know that. she’s calm, polite, but her tone & face says everything her words cant. 

bran interrupting was great. 

he sees what’s going on here and he’s right, now isnt the time for a little cat fight. he tells them that the night king has a dragon & dany’s reaction is clear she didn’t know that yet (right? i could be forgetting lol) & basically there’s like 100 other things they need to think about right then. which to be fair is totally true. but i had hoped to see a little more between sansa & dany.  what i loved though was jon didn’t look at dany when bran mentioned the night king having her dragon, he looked at sansa. 

now i wanna talk about arya and jon’s reunion because

well... i have feelings.

while the initial reunion was really sweet & had me crying, it ended real quick

this scene is where i really noticed jon was “off” 

jon stoops down and puts a hand on her shoulder (which arya looks down at) as he talks to her. where were you before? i could have used your help with sansa. she doesnt like your queen, does she?

then we get this next line from jon.  

first things first, it’s almost like jon doesnt realize she’s grown up. he’s got his hand on her shoulder, down at her level like you would with a kid. i mean, he probably cant help it, can he? she’s always going to be his kid sister, after all. thats how he knows her and remembers her. not to mention he’s been pretending to be someone else around dany for a long time now, he’s trying to shake himself back into the person his family knows him as 

arya looks at his hand before she says she’s the smartest person i know. you’re defending her now? you?

like he cant really believe that these two sisters that only used to bicker and fight are getting along to the point that arya is defending her to him. this is where i get upset with jon because he’s been gone for how long now? has he even bothered to talk to sansa about all that happened at winterfell? has he even asked her anything about what’s been going on while he was gone? clearly not, or he would know how close arya and sansa have become in his absence. that they’d taken out littlefinger together, even! 

i’m defending my family. so is she. i’m her family too. 

that alone points me into the direction of political jon. he’s avoiding sansa because he’s less likely to control himself in front of her. he might spill the beans about what he’s up to and its not time yet. he cant let that happen, not until the right time. while we all know he’d be better off telling her and the other starklings, so they could fight as a united pack... jon hasn’t come to that conclusion yet. lets hope he gets there next episode, though. 

he sounds so sad, so dejected when he delivers his line. like, sansa should be defending him, smiling, just in general happy to see him back. he’s brought a massive army and dragons! he did what he thought was best for the north and he cant quite grasp why sansa would be upset with him. one of jon’s weaknesses is sansa and how he thinks she feels about him. he craves her approval and he knows she’s angry with him at this point. and man does that bother him. he thinks she should have ultimate faith in him, even though he doesnt really deserve that, does he? anyways, thats a conversation for later in the post.

ps i love that he looks around before saying im her family too. almost as if he’s afraid of being overheard. 

dont you ever forget that.

yeah i had to pause the show at this point just to compose myself. this second hug was just as sweet as the first and im glad it was there. it finished the scene out nicely. 

i love how we got this moment of them being addressed at the same time, in frame like this. i live for moments like this, with them side by side. 

we get a lot of talk back and forth about why jon bent the knee and of course we get lyanna mormont calling his dumb ass out. 

i was waiting for this scene too & it didnt disappoint me. 

also i find his choice of words interesting 

sansa looks back at him and she’s literally the embodiment of the shrug emoji. like bitch i told u so. she has zero sympathy for him and the mess he’s in with the northern lords because she fucking told him it would happen. 

tyrion gets up and tries to do some mega damage control because lets be real, this situation is getting nasty. he talks about dany’s amazing army and the dragons as if this will lighten the mood. he also mentions about the lannister army coming (lol) like this is what will get everyone on their side. 

sansa interrupts and god do i love her more than i ever did

finally someone asking the REAL questions. 

sansa has worried about feeding the entire north the whole time jon has been gone. she’s built up as much as she could to ensure her people didn’t starve to death come winter. now jon shows up with this queen and her massive army with not even a wagon load of grain. when it cuts to dany a moment later, you can see she’s visibly shaken by sansa’s comment. hmm, wonder why? it couldn’t be because she’d just burned TONS of food that could have been used to feed her army and the rest of the north out of spite, right? nah, couldn’t be. 

sansa spits out these words and just look at her face- she’s doing her best to control herself here but her mouth is a snarl and her eyes are narrowed. she’s got every right to be angry over this- her people will probably starve because this so called queen hasn’t provided anything for her own army and now sansa will have to figure it out herself. if she’s this angry already, imagine how she’s going to feel when she learns dany burned all that food when she burned the lannister army. 

what makes me angry here is dany’s response. whatever they want. she’s so fucking childish i cant stand it. like she’s so bent out of shape that sansa’s calling her out basically, she’s going to resort to these sort of comments. like, you keep calling yourself a queen, fucking act like it dany. not a jealous, spoiled little girl. id respect her a whole lot more if she’d stood up for herself and her dragons here but that was never going to happen. its out of her character, especially at this point in her story. her dragons really could never do any wrong, in her eyes. and at this point i wouldnt be surprised to hear her defend them burning houses, crops, or innocent people. 

this episode is not making me like dany anymore. i cant stand characters like her, good or bad ones. and we all know dany is trending bad these days. but sansa doesnt even respond which is fantastic- instead of listening to her, everyone is focused on what dany had just said. we stan the real queen. 

im pretty sure next we see the bit between tyrion and sansa.

i didnt dislike the scene, it was actually pretty good. i especially liked the last time we saw each other was at joffrey’s wedding. dismal affair. it had it’s moments.

we also got this

not only is this true, we also later hear dany threaten sansa. 

interesting. 

but other than that, i didnt take much away from it. sansa was cool to him, as i expected her to be to anyone on dany’s side. tyrion may have been kind to her once, but as far as she’s concerned... he’s basically her enemy now. plus the whole scene before couldn’t have helped. 

somehwere in this we get all that junk with jon and dany. 

i... hated it. all of it. 

but after seeing it im 100% certain political jon is coming. his stiff demeanor with dany hasn’t changed, thats for sure. but what sold me was when dany threatened sansa. 

i’m queen, she must respect me or...

we all know  how jon “dont touch my sister or else” snow acts when someone mentions sansa around him in a way he doesnt like. the fact that jon barely even REACTS is clear in its message: he cant behave like he normally would. not with dany. he cant even go against her because he know how easy it is for her to become swayed. he cant lose control of the situation, not yet. i think he knows things are spiraling out of control more quickly than he anticipated. 

political jon must be a thing because there’s no reason for him to then roam across the north on a fucking dragon. the whole jonerys scene was as lackluster as they all have been and the kiss with drogon watching was very... weird. it felt ominous almost. there was no romance behind it, even if dany wanted there to be. 

but i think its very clear that dany feels threatened by sansa. she needs to be loved by everyone and sansa makes it clear she cares little if at all for her. queen or not, sansa doesnt respect her, nor like her, and she isnt afraid to make it known. i worry how dany is going to behave the deeper into this love triangle we get (because they sure arent being subtle about it). 

also, something i find interesting is the fact that dany would allow jon to ride her dragons at all. now that he has rode rhaegal he’s created a bond with the dragon, essentially taking him from dany’s control. she’s more or less lost 2 dragons now. and if you dont think jon would use this dragon against her to protect his family... then we must be watching two different shows.  

next comes jon’s scene with sansa (i think, at least its what im gonna talk about next lol). finally we get a glimpse of them alone! and god it doesnt disappoint me at all. i mean, id have loved to have more of it of course- yelling and even some tears, but we got something simple and hyper charged with both of their emotions. as always, the jonsa scenes get it done with as little as possible. 

we get a lot of angry stares and heavy sighs. its the same damn energy as the tent scene before the battle of the bastards. i love it. i fucking live for it. there’s so many things left unsaid between them and it makes me want their next scene that much more. literally, this scene was less than 2min long and i got so much from it. 

the scene opens and sansa is in her chamber, reading. the knock on the door sounds and she calls them in and she sighs when she sees it’s jon. the first thing i noticed was jon back in his old direwolf armor- he changed clothes before coming to her rooms- and then sansa paraphrases what the letter she’s holding says. jon parrots back lord glover’s words to them back when they met and thats when sansa gets up, very clearly angry, and says i will stand behind jon snow, the king in the north. she whips around to look at him and walks across the room like she wants to do something else entirely. i told you we needed allies. you didnt tell me you were going to abandon your crown.

this is where jon explodes, much how he explodes back in the tent scene with her. i never wanted a crown! i wanted to protect the north! he tells her, then goes on to say he brought with him an army and 2 dragons. this is where i wish we would have had more- sansa yelling at him about did he even think of how they would feed them all, specifically. but we get a lot of ~emotion~ and im living for every second. 

(gifs by @desired-paradise)

as soon as jon finishes ranting, he heaves a huge sigh (first gif). then he closes his eyes, thinking for a moment, before breaking down an asking her if she has faith in him. look at her face- she’s so hurt. they’re both hurting, honestly. what i love about jonsa scenes is how soft and vulnerable they both are during them. they let down their walls and open their hearts to the other. 

i think that’s why jon is so hurt by how sansa has been treating him since his return. he thinks he deserves her ultimate trust not realizing how he really doesnt deserve it. not,yet. you know i do. despite it all, she does have faith in him. but that doesnt mean she isnt angry or upset with him. and it doesnt change how she feels about dany. trust is not something that comes easy to sansa, not anymore. how can she be expected to trust a complete stranger when even those who were supposed to care about her turned on her? when for so long everyone around her was nothing beyond abusive and harmful. this girl trusts no one but her family and jon should get that better than anyone. 

but he thinks because its him, he gets a pass from her. that because of all they’ve been through together sansa should automatically know where his heart is and the truth of him. but how can she? he’s been gone all this time, promising to find them allies, not a queen that they didn’t ask for or even want. he promised them allies that would help them, not doom them to starvation.

when sansa speaks, he takes a step forward, almost like he thought of reaching for her. but he thinks better of it and says something about how she’ll be a good queen, yada yada. 

 and then... sansa drops this bomb

we never get jon’s answer because thats it, the scene just fucking ends there. like alright guys, thats fine i didnt want the answer anyways. i know jonerys fans are insisting he doesn’t answer because we already know the answer to that. but its not that easy. 

the set up between jon and sansa can’t be for nothing. the back story from season 6 cant just  be a random addition. so many lines that will come back this season (ill protect you, i promise. you are to me. ect) and i cant wait for that. 

next i want to talk about when dany and jorah meet with sam. 

first off, i have to say its weird that jorah has never told dany his name? is that just me? anyways. the scene opens and it reminds me a lot of the feel from her first meeting with sansa. dany is smiling, jovial. this is the man that saved jorah from death and she wants to thank him personally. their conversation goes well- in fact, its kind of sweet how sam behaves. he’s honored to be standing before her, being addressed by her, because he doesnt know who daenerys targaryen is yet. but he’s about to find out.

similarly to how dany reacted when sansa didn’t return her compliment, she goes from soft and smiling to hard and somewhat aggressive.

we go from this: 

to this:

(image from @snowsjohn)

in record time. as soon as sam mentions his name, it registers with dany and she asks him if he meant randyll tarly. that’s when she immediately, without sympathy, tells him she executed his father. you can see sam get visibly upset but he’s doing his best to keep it together, saying at least i can go home now, which by the way... is fucking heartbreaking. now that his brother is in charge he could go back home and be with his family when this whole thing was over. oh nope, dany tells him she executed his brother too. 

how anyone can stand behind this queen, ill never understand. this scene was so sad for sam & so unfeeling for dany. she doesnt even have the sense to pretend to be remorseful for what she’s done to this man’s family. and when sam does leave, she looks upset- but not because of what she’d done to his family. because now she’s in trouble and she knows it. again, they’re making it incredibly easy to dislike dany and they’re doing it for a reason. 

dark dany is coming for us. it’s going to all be revealed in the next two episodes, without a doubt. 

last but not least, i want to talk about sam telling jon the truth of who his parents were. 

(gifs by @kitsn0w)

i loved this whole scene.

while i was really surprised they told jon so early (and that it was sam alone) i enjoyed the shock. i didn’t honestly anticipate the reveal until at least episode 2, if not the third at the latest. but, it added something to the first episode- a similar shock value the first episode of the first season left us with. 

what i take from this scene is a few things, mostly how upset jon seems just to realize that this means ned lied to him his whole life. who gives a fuck about the truth, why didn’t ned just tell him all along? but when sam says the line about robert killing him, he seems to calm down a little. 

what else is interesting is jon’s lack of defending dany here. if he loved her as we’re supposed to believe, wouldnt he have said something beyond this is treason. id expect a “what will i say to her?” or “i cant take this from her, its all shes ever wanted’ or even “its hers, not mine.” anything else! but we got nothing in terms of jon defending dany’s right to the crown. 

and when sam asks him if dany would give up her crown for his people as jon had done, we don’t get jon’s answer. similarly to his scene being cut off with sansa, its done here as well, and we’re only left wondering what he would say. why wouldn’t they let him say? if he loves dany so much, wouldn’t he jump at this chance to defend her? especially to sam, who’s going to have a hell of time going forward now that he learned what dany did to his family. more so, it’s not yet been revealed that she burned them alive. what will they say then? when they realize that? 

i guess we’ll find out next episode, especially now that jaime is in winterfell. im really excited to see what episode 2 brings & im hoping for more dark dany & more private moments among the starks. 

overall, i really did enjoy the episode. i think there were things that could have been done better or differently,  but i think the episode set us up for a lot of good things to come!

in conclusion:

- jonsa is endgame & jonerys is doomed. sorry guys. 

- political jon theory is confirmed (in my mind at least)

- sansa is still the queen of sass.

- arya & gendry flirting is adorable (im sorry i know i didnt talk about them)

- WHERE. IS. GHOST?

thanks for reading!