#but this new style more than makes up for it

[beloveds-embrace]

Sooo much angstttttttttttt 😭

I need the boys to wake up and do whatever it takes to fix it, please, I can't take the angst 😭😭😭

Does this count as fix-it? 🤔 hope you enjoy, anon! Also this turned out far longer than i thought it would lol

First Part

Another shift slowly happens within the duchy, palpable. The whispers of servants echo louder than ever, growing sharp and cutting in the empty halls you once used to frequent. They still avoid you, but now they wonder and whisper of your health. It’s not just them; the men you’d once hoped you’d at least be on an amicable basis with slowly change as well, the longer your absence haunts the halls and galas.

John is the first to act. It’s hesitant at first, awkward even, as though he can’t figure out how to approach the shattered remains of what he’s ignored for so long. He stands outside your door one evening, his shadow stretching under the flickering candlelight, fist raised to knock. But he doesn’t. Not at first. He falters, as if the weight of his guilt roots him to the spot.

When he finally does knock, it’s tentative, barely audible.

“…Are you awake?” His voice carries a softness you’ve never heard before, but it grates against your numbness.

You don’t answer. Your eyes barely flick towards the door, not moving from where you are curled on your side.

He lingers, sighs, and leaves.

You had intended to let yourself waste away, in all honesty. Only your mother doesn’t let you; she bursts into your room one day, sneers at the miserable sight you make, and insults you to the high heavens. Nothing new, even if her digs hurt, even if she says she isn’t surprised by no one loving you when you are like this, but she forces you to eat some nibbles and then into a shower; she doesn’t care. She is simply tired of having you be an embarrassment and hiding away from the public eye.

Thus, you no longer stay in your room. You don’t bother with jewelry, with heavy gowns or complicated hair styles or even clearing the layer of dust off your furniture, you just leave your room. Thankfully,

Unfortunately, that means passing by the maids and servants. It means passing by them. It means interacting with them again, though no longer initiated by you.

Simon is the second, and less direct. He lingers in places you begin to re-frequent; the library, the gardens, the corridors near your room. He doesn’t speak, just watches from the periphery, eyes heavy and intense. Once, when you brush past him without acknowledging his presence, he mutters something under his breath, his fists clenching at his sides. But he doesn’t try to stop you and you don ask what he said.

He probably didn’t mean you, anyways. You doubt he wants to speak to you, the obstacle.

Johnny falters the most. Though your interactions with him were few, you’d occasionally hear from the servants about how fun he is in general. His smiles, though they’ve never been aimed at you, look quite fake to you, jokes half-hearted and dying on his lips whenever you pass on rare occasions.

One day, he brings a tray of food to your room himself, hoping to coax you into eating with something he’s cooked just for you. You answer the door, see him holding it, and shake your head without a word. Even if it looks delectable, like the dishes John would get.

“Please,” he says, his voice cracking. “I- just try a bit, hen.”

But you close the door before he can say more. He will try again and often, sometimes just leaving the tray, but you never touch it. You’ve lost weight, you know, and the only reason you are getting some nutrients at this point is because you occasionally sneak into the kitchens late at night for tiny snacks to tide you over. If Johnny knows it’s you, he’s never said anything.

Kyle is quieter, yet more present. The guilt eats away at him the most; he knows that his lack of care and respect had a part in the way the rest of the maids and staff treated you. He spends his evenings pacing the hall outside your room, his head bowed, mumbling apologies that you’ll never hear, wondering which one is best.

Once, he catches you in the garden alone, his mouth opening as if to speak, but you pass him without so much as a glance; you already know he won’t care for you have to say or ask for, he’ll just say he is busy, so you just don’t bother.

He stays frozen in place, his hand half-raised, the words stuck in his throat.

The servants, per Kyle and John’s orders, begin to change. Their guilt is slower to manifest, but it’s there and it’s evident in the way they rush to fulfill your needs despite your reluctance. They clean your room with quiet efficiency, no longer treating you like a burden, even though you hadn’t asked it of them. They leave fresh flowers on your desk and vanity, extra blankets on your bed, and freshly pressed gowns in your wardrobe.

You ignore all of it. It’s a waste of everyone’s time snd effort. You aren’t worth it.

Yet despite their heavy guilt, they return to and continue serving you.

But nothing changes the heaviness in your chest, the emptiness that refuses to leave.

One day, closer to the date of the annual winter gala hosted by the emperial family, you step into the dining room unannounced, your presence startling them all. It’s the first time you’ve joined them in weeks. You move slowly, your posture rigid and tired, your expression unreadable.

“Duchess,” John starts, his voice uncertain, rising from his seat.

“…John,” You sit without meeting his eyes, your movements slow and deliberate. The table is silent, the tension suffocating as John, Simon, and Kyle exchange uncertain glances.

John clears his throat. “It’s good to see you, wife.”

You don’t respond.

The meal is awkward, stilted, but it’s necessary for you; you need to get reused to John for your eventual reappearance in high society. Johnny offers you dishes with a hesitant, hopeful look in his eyes, and Kyle pours your wine with an unsteady grip. John and Simon try to start a conversation, but their words falter and fade when you don’t reply.

Still, they try. Over the following weeks, their efforts grow.

John begins carving out time to spend with you, awkwardly hovering near your door, waiting for even a crumb of acknowledgment. He starts leaving small notes for you- apologies and quiet promises to be better. They pile up on your desk, untouched but not thrown away. You want to believe, but you feel jaded and tired.

Simon offers you quiet companionship, instead. Standing at your side in the garden or library, saying nothing but ensuring you’re not alone. He speaks softly when he does talk, a one-sided conversation with only the occasional hum or noise from you, but he’s undeterred.

Johnny keeps cooking for you, leaving trays of food outside your door with little notes attached: Eat a bit, bonnie. Just for me. You don’t eat much, still have very little appetite, but you do start taking bites here and there, and it’s enough to keep him trying.

Kyle offers small acts of service- holding doors open for you, keeping anything you might need available at hanf, ensuring your rooms are kept warm and comfortable. His words are rare, but his actions speak of endless guilt and the quiet hope that he can earn even a sliver of forgiveness.

The maids and butlers follow suit, their movements quieter, their service more thoughtful. They stop muttering, their eyes full of remorse whenever they see you. They bow in respect, and no longer treat you as if you aren’t a part of the duchy.

But you keep them all at arm’s length. Their guilt is evident, their efforts genuine, but the wounds they’ve left on your heart are deep. Forgiveness, if it ever comes, will not be easily earned. For now, you let them try, watching their clumsy attempts with a mixture of numbness and quiet satisfaction (that you do feel guilty over, but truly can’t help).

Several weeks before the gala, John comes to your office. He sits down, and waits until you are finished with your paperwork before he speaks. You are in a beautiful dress- Simon’s gift- and your hair is in a delicate style, done by your maids. You look pretty. You feel nice, even if the numbness remains. These days, it’s less.

“Duchess, I was thinking,” he began, voice soft and patient. “it might do you some good to get away for a while. A change of scenery.”

You turned to look at him, the suggestion pulling you from your numb reverie. His blue eyes searched yours, and for once, there was no coldness, no distance. “Somewhere quiet,” he continued, “where you can rest… away from all of this.”

The idea of leaving the suffocating walls of the manor, and the heavy tension of the duchy was tempting. And yet, you hesitated, unsure if you could trust the gesture or if it was just another attempt to smooth over appearances.

“I’ll take care of everything,” he added quickly, as if sensing your doubt. “You won’t have to worry about a thing. You can choose who you’d like to go with, or even if you want to go alone. It’s entirely up to you, Duchess.”

Johnny and Kyle appeared in the doorway then, Kyle holding a tray with a steaming cup of tea, Johnny with a small, hopeful smile and a plate of your favorite biscuits. Even Simon lingered near the threshold, his gaze steady but tinged with something softer than usual.

They were all waiting for your answer, their expressions almost pleading. You could feel the weight of their guilt and the sincerity of their offer. It wasn’t much- not enough to erase everything that had passed- but it was something. A step forward.

“…I’ll think about it.” you said at last, your voice quiet but firm. And for the first time in a long while, you saw a flicker of relief in their eyes.

[rottenbrainstuff]

SiiiiIiIIIIiiigh

People fundamentally misunderstand what generative AI is. It doesn’t create new things. It cut and pastes existing things using math. It’s a room full of monkeys cutting up stacks of magazines and gluing them back together. People also fundamentally misunderstand just what the fuck art even is and where it comes from.

Van Gogh was experimenting with a bold new style of painting because the increasing quality and commercial availability of the camera meant that painting was no longer seen as having to, by definition, capture a realistic and accurate image, and artists were starting to get expressive. His painting style was unpopular at the time because audiences were shocked by the bright colours and bold brushwork. The style of art was derogatorily called “fauvism”, meaning, in the style of a wild beast.

There is absolutely no fucking way a hypothetical AI of the time would have been able to generate A Starry Night based on Van Gogh’s prompts. There is absolutely no fucking way a current AI can generate any kind of culturally meaningful art. Art is about the thought and decisions behind it, what the artist wants to do and say, what boundaries they want to push, what issues they want to explore. Generative AI can only cut and paste what already exists and that, BY DEFINITION, will never ever be groundbreaking. Generative AI can only make a decorative object to be looked at, it can’t also generate human emotions and decisions and desires and exploration and boundary pushing that is the WHOLE FUCKING POINT OF ART.

I know the average person is maybe uneducated about how AI works exactly, and I know the average person definitely did not go to art school and honestly might not understand that there’s more to art than just an aesthetically pleasing object to look at, but it still drives up the fucking wall all the same.

[bluebeads-art]

2024 November 21st

INTO THE LAKE WITH YOU, MUD CHILD

My part of a retroactive art trade with @anxiousapplepie ! "Retroactive" because I was already drawing this before we agreed to make it part of a trade, heheh.

I read this post about their Role!Swap AU, and, like, multiverse shenanigans? Check. Characters goofing off and having fun? Check. Several opportunities for slapstick humor? Check. Conclusion: I really wanted to draw it. Physical comedy is my specialty. :p

This thing is kinda all over the place composition wise (looking at you, relative sizes of speech bubbles) because there is Too Much going on in these panels and I Did Not plan ahead of time, lmao. This was supposed to be doodlier than it ended up being, so as a growing pain it's a funny jumble of consistency. One of these days I'll be able to doodle without getting carried away. 😂

More rambling and close-ups under the cut

This interaction in particular is what nudged me over the edge to draw this whole thing. I don't know what Fighter Mirabelle's malfunction is when it comes to the Siffrins, but it lets me make Sif the butt of a joke again, so yeehaw! His hat being catapulted out of frame made me laugh when I was thinking of what to do with the composition-complicating hat in question.

Also my personal take is Siffrin is 100% having the time of their life here. Making new(?) friends? Being involved in a fun group activity? Well worth inhaling some puddle water and having to go jump in The Lake to wash the mud off later.

Bonnie being so furious they changed art styles wasn't in my original plan, but I'm so glad I thought of it on a whim because it made me laugh Every Time I looked at their face. 😂

Time taken on this whole thing was 42 hours and 50 minutes. AND. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS BAD. IF YOU KNOW I'M TRYING TO SPEED UP MY ART PROCESS. But this project gets a special pass. This was the farthest out of my art comfort zone I've been in a while! 13 (mostly) full-body characters at various complicated angles, 2 backgrounds, learning to use CSP's perspective rulers, effects I'm not used to like water splashes, etc etc. I made progress on speeding up sketching & line art as well! Some of the lines you see are just extremely cleaned up sketch. I was able to let myself fudge things more too. For example, Mira's dress is a very "dude just trust me" simplification because I don't know how the clothes folds would work at that angle. ^^;;

So while there's still a handful of things I'm not happy with, it's worth it for the learning experience and perfectionism-busting progress! Also for the sake of drawing silliness, of course.

Oh, lastly; the KO sprite is the one from in-game, so it was made by insertdisc5 and not me.

[giirlblood]

caregiver ! vi headcanons !!

requested by @themoondropcollective . spinning around because i LAUV vi , he's one of my own fictional cgs (>/////< " ) . butch cg for eensy butch !! i refer to vi with he / him pronouns .. you can pry tmasc butch vi from my cold dead hands . it brings me comfort as a fellow trans butch to see someone like me :3 .. if you'd prefer other pronouns let me know but i default to he for him . that being said my vi is not a binary man pronouns do not equal gender :L .

vi is the silliest caregiver ever !! more like an older sibling in the sense that he doesn't have lots of rules && can't help but giggle when you get into mischief . he calls you lots of silly nicknames like nugget , bug , && squirt !! he teases you by calling you tiny sometimes as a nickname too but it always comes with a chuckle && a hair tousle .

while its my truth that vi is transmasculine he loves being called "mama" by his littles . you also call him "bubba" but he always melts when someone calls him "mama" or just "ma" . he does Not like being called mommy though . he's also okay with more masculine names like "papa" or "dada" as well && responds better to daddy than mommy though it's not preferred .

always telling you stories !! some of them are made up but a lot of them are about his life . he often gets lost in his tales but you hang onto his every last word .

loves to teach you new things . these little lessons often come with a little story of his own !! he notices you giggling && bites back a laugh of his own . " mama's silly , huh squirt." teaches you how to throw a punch but also about little everyday things like tying your shoes .

SOOOO protective .. literally your guard dog , he will not hesitate to throw a punch or clap back verbally if someone poses a threat to you . king of glares too , he scares away aaallll the meanies . always holding your hand && proudly calling you his little one . he often has his hand on your shoulder as a way to reassure you he's there for back up .

always including your stuffies in everything , he's so playful with them !! if you're sad he'll have them talk to you in silly voices to cheer you up && he has little conversations with them to make you giggle . sometimes he can't help but crack up himself .

he lets you play with his hair && put little clips in it . you love his hair soo much , the color is so AWESOME !! when his hair is longer he lets you style it however you like .

on the topic of hair he loves washing yours . it's super soothing for him && makes him feel closer to you . it's something so intimate that he treasures , running his hands through your hair , doing his best to learn all he can about how to take care of it if you have more kinky hair so he can meet all of your needs .

he's super good at braiding from always doing powder's braids && it's something that calms him down . if you have longer hair he's always happy to braid it — he can do all of the fancy braids !! he tries to teach you but your fingers are a bit clumsy what with you being so little .

even though he himself doesn't always practice safe binding he makes sure that you do . if you whine about it trying to point out that he doesn't he sheepishly says something like , "well you shouldn't do everything daddy does ."

[woozisguitar]

happy fuckin' birthday

pairing: jihoon x reader (afab)

warnings: kissing, swearing, suggestive towards the end so MDNI, bad bad ideas

word count: 1.2k

a/n: happy birthday to my girlfriend, husband, princess, the real love of my life, lee jihoon. idk what id do without you, my loverboy. everyday im so grateful you and me exist in the same timeline. please always be happier than me <3 (lowercase intended and not beta)

the fast bustling and the faint smell of coffee, which once felt intimidating, now feels like home. it’s been 8 months since you were last here, and god, you missed this. the overseas project took longer than anticipated, but none of that matters now that you’re back with the one you love. you slowly make your way to the floor where his studio is, trying to be as lowkey as possible. see, the thing is, you were supposed to arrive a week later, but the project wrapped up early, and there was no reason for you to stay away from your lover on his birthday. cue a last-minute birthday surprise which only you and his manager knew about.

when the elevator opened on his studio floor, you came face to face with none other than kwon soonyoung. soonyoung is a close friend, but you knew his hyperactivity would give away your plans in a second.

“yn, what are you—”

“shhhhhhhhhhh!” you shushed soonyoung, pulling him into the elevator and pressing the button to the top floor.

“dude, what the hell are you doing back so early?”

“jihoon’s birthday. the project wrapped up, and there was no reason for me to miss it,” you explained and saw a smile creeping up on your friend’s face.

“so, i’m guessing he doesn’t know?”

“nope. i planned this so last minute i’m not even sure if he’s free today.”

“he’s free. working as usual,” soonyoung rolled his eyes, “but i think i have an idea.”

“uh-oh.”

“so your great idea was to tell everyone except jihoon that i’m here? way to keep things lowkey, soonie,” you rolled your eyes, trying to figure out which idea would involve all 12 of jihoon’s members and his manager.

“nooo,” he dragged out the 'o', “the great idea is that we will distract him and sneak you into the studio where you can hide. then, once we leave, you can surprise him!”

“or give him a heart attack and an early death, which would be one hell of a birthday gift,” seungkwan commented, side-eyeing soonyoung.

“well, do you have a better idea?” seungkwan slowly shook his head no. “that’s what i thought. anyways, yn, trust me—he will like this.”

you gave his idea a second thought. well, it’s not like you had something better in mind anyway.

“god, this better work, soonyoung, or i’ll have your head.”

so the idea was indeed stupid.

the plan was that jihoon’s manager would first enter the studio to discuss next week’s schedule, and once he gave you a thumbs-up, the members would all file in and ‘discuss the latest album.’ 12 men filing in to talk at the same time about the same thing? totally not suspicious.

but somehow, this was the best bet you had. so now you were outside the universe factory with the members, waiting for jihoon’s manager to give a thumbs-up. after what felt like an eternity (it was 5 minutes), his manager emerged and gave a subtle thumbs-up.

this was truly starting to feel more and more stupid as the plan progressed.

“everyone ready?” whispered mingyu, and the others nodded in confirmation. slowly, they all started to file in, and you heard them greet jihoon. once all of them were inside, you slowly peeped in to see them form a subtle wall between jihoon and the back of the couch where you were planning to hide.

slowly, you crept in, crouching low and making your way toward the back of the couch. you heard the boys discuss concepts and styles they wanted to try out for the new album. from this angle, it looked like jihoon was undergoing an intervention, and you stifled a small giggle at the mental image. after making sure you were hidden properly behind the couch, you slowly peeked out from the side to see jihoon between jun’s and dino’s legs.

god, he looks so pretty, were your first thoughts. it had been 8 months since you last saw him in person, felt his touch, and kissed his lips. you wanted nothing more than for this plan to be over so you could kiss your boyfriend. you slid back into your hiding spot and texted soonyoung that you were in place. you heard his phone buzz and received a thumbs-up in response.

the members slowly started to wrap up their ‘discussion’ and leave the studio after making some kind of excuse. if jihoon noticed their weird behavior, he sure as hell didn’t comment on it. once all the members left, you slowly peeked out again to see jihoon turned to his computer with his headphones in place. you could hear the loud bass from his headphones and made a mental note to reprimand him about it later.

you crawled from your hiding spot toward jihoon’s chair. from your position, you saw seokmin, soonyoung, and seungkwan hiding behind a partially obstructive door, phones already recording. you quietly rose to your feet, making sure not to touch anything that could alert him to your presence. you leaned down and pressed a small kiss to his cheek.

“happy birthday, baby.”

jihoon jumped from his chair, arms raised to fight whoever broke in. his sudden movement shook you off balance, and you grabbed his now discarded chair to stabilize yourself.

“calm down—it’s me!” you exclaimed, giggling at his confused face.

“y/n,” jihoon blinked, lowering his hands, “what..? i don’t...?”

you heard booseoksoon giggling outside and yelled at them to leave you two alone. once you heard the door click shut, you got closer to jihoon, pressing another kiss to his nose.

“yes, y/n, you dork.”

“you’re here.”

“mhm.”

“you’re actually here? i’m not, like, hallucinating or anything, right?” jihoon blinked, trying to figure out what was happening, making you giggle.

“yes, yes, i’m actually here.”

upon hearing this, jihoon grabbed you by the waist and pulled you closer, nuzzling his face into your neck. “what are you doing here? you’re supposed to be back next week.”

“well, you see,” you hugged him tighter, “i finished the project early and had a lovely guy waiting for me on the other side of the world. and i wanted to celebrate his birthday with him.”

“you did this all for me?” he breathed out.

“of course. who else would i do this for?”

jihoon shook his head, falling back into his chair and dragging you to straddle him.

“god, i fucking missed you,” he said, pulling you in for a heated kiss.

all the months of missing, yearning, and longing manifested in desperate kisses shared between the two of you. you slid your fingers into his hair while his found home in the curve of your waist, pulling you into him. jihoon slid his tongue into your mouth while you started to slowly grind yourself against him. he let out a moan, prompting you to keep grinding, feeling yourself heat at the core. jihoon’s moans grew louder as you felt him harden below you.

“wait,” you pulled back breathless, “not yet.”

“mhmm..?” jihoon made a confused sound at the lack of contact. his eyes were blown with desire, and his fingers held you close, almost as if he were worried you’d disappear.

“i want to give you your first birthday present,” you smirked mischievously, getting off his lap and kneeling in front of him.

“what are you...oh.”

jihoon leaned back, a sigh escaping his lips. “well, happy fucking birthday to me.”

and after a series of birthday ‘gifts,’ it was indeed a happy birthday.

a/n: heh sorry for teasing but I really do wish 100000/10 that jihoon gets the best birthday head he deserves one so bad (I volunteer as tribute-)

[itsrlymine]

Heyyy!! I really like your blog and id love to share some of my manifestations bc seeing your list and advice inspired me to manifest some stuff for myself💗

I made people absent at will within like a few hours, it was a teacher I really hated and she’s seeming always present but I just decided she’s not one morning and turns out she got stuck in a bad traffic so we missed classes with her 😭 I did this multiple times with multiple teachers

My grades are literally perfect and I never study, the moment I take an exam it’s like information floods my brain and I always get the best results in my entire class to the point I’m considered the class’ smartest 🤭

I manifested new stores opening up all around me with clothes exactly in my style and around 4 days ago, I think, a new thrift store with great quality y2k clothes opened up near me and the clothes look straight out of my pinterest board

I manifested money so many times I can’t even count… its either my parents giving me some, someone else paying for me, or just opening my wallet and there’s more than I saw before

I completely changed my voice. I used to hate it bc it was very shaky and I sounded on the verge of crying when just speaking normally, but now my voice is very smooth and stable + sounds very soft I love it

I’m not very interested in dating, but I did manifest people showing romantic interest in me + got my previous crush to be absolutely down bad for me it was crazy 😭

I got an Iphone, earbuds, and a new laptop for free

I also changed my appearance in various ways such as changing my eyecolor, clearing up my skin, changing my hair colour, changing my hands bone structure (they used to have quite wide joints that’ll stick out in a weird way, but now they’re straight) and more…

If I were to give advice to others I’ll just say to trust yourself and know that you have it bc you absolutely do, that’s how easy it is 🤧

Yes yes yes yes yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Y’all don’t understand how happy it makes me to see yall with all these successes omgg🥹💖 So you made people absent and had people show up, you perfected your grades, manifested money, CHANGED YOUR VOICE???? and new tech for freeeee as well as physical appearance changes…… Babe. I’m gonna be honest. You a f*cking master at this but you already knew that!!!!!! It’s so easy and all it takes is trusting yourself yes!!!

Maybe we should all do a list manifestation thingy and just get a bunch of amazing random shit. I love you so much for sharing and I’m so excited to see what else you have in store for yourself💖💖💖

[fratttymatty]

A Recipe For Transformation

(All characters are 18+)

Maxwell Harris, a 35-year-old chef, had spent the better part of his adult life building a quiet, nerdy, and comfortable existence. A self-proclaimed introvert with an encyclopedic knowledge of culinary history, he found his solace in the kitchen. His restaurant, The Pantry's Secret, wasn’t a Michelin-star establishment, but it was cozy, warm, and a favorite for those who appreciated simple yet delicious dishes. Maxwell was never much for trends. He had a small but loyal following on Instagram, mostly of people who admired his rustic food and quirky cooking videos.

Maxwell was also gay. Though he’d never made a big deal out of it, his romantic life was something he kept private. A few dates here and there, nothing too serious, and that was how he liked it—comfortable and familiar.

But everything changed one ordinary Tuesday evening when Maxwell found himself scrolling mindlessly through his phone after a long day of plating plates and dicing onions. He’d heard of TikTok before—mostly from his teenage nieces and the occasional viral dance clip—but he’d never really bothered to check it out. That night, curiosity got the better of him. He downloaded the app on a whim and started browsing. And that’s when he saw it: a video of a guy with perfect abs flipping pancakes while flexing his muscles and grinning at the camera. The caption read: “Who says you can’t cook and look this good? 😎 #chef #fyp.”

Maxwell didn’t know what to make of it, but something stirred inside of him. It wasn’t just the muscles or the smirk that caught his attention. There was something about the sheer confidence of the guy, the effortless charisma that he seemed to radiate. For the first time in a long time, Maxwell felt an odd mix of fascination and envy.

He didn’t think much of it, until he went to bed that night. As he drifted off to sleep, the faces and poses of those TikTok "influencers" played on loop in his mind, each one more dazzling than the last.

When Maxwell woke up the next morning, everything was wrong. His reflection in the bathroom mirror was no longer his own. The first thing he noticed was his skin—it was flawless, tanned, and golden, like he’d spent every summer outdoors. His face had changed too—his jawline was sharp, his cheekbones were high, and there was no sign of the nerdy, bespectacled man he had once been. His hair, once brown and slightly messy, was now thick and dark brown, styled perfectly into a tousled, beachy wave. And the body… Maxwell’s once-soft belly had been replaced by tight, defined muscles. He was tall, lean, and impossibly athletic. There was no trace of the chef he had been.

“Holy shit,” he whispered under his breath, and the voice that came out of his mouth was deep, confident, and undeniably… cocky.

He wasn’t Maxwell Harris anymore. He was Blake Harper—a name that felt right somehow, and a persona that seemed to fit his new body. For a moment, panic flickered in his chest. How was this possible? Was he dreaming? Was this some kind of sick joke? But no matter how many times he splashed cold water on his face, the reflection didn’t change. He was stuck. But the strange thing was, part of him didn’t even care. He was too mesmerized by his new appearance to be truly upset.

Maxwell—now Blake—stared at himself in awe. He felt an overwhelming sense of confidence that had never existed before. The kitchen he once loved, with its knives and pots, felt distant. In fact, the thought of returning to the mundane routine of chopping vegetables made him cringe. Instead, his attention was drawn back to his phone, where TikTok still lingered open on his screen.

Blake found himself scrolling through thirst traps, videos of shirtless men flexing their muscles and showing off their abs, all while cooking something ridiculously simple like ramen or grilled cheese. The odd mixture of food and body worship was bizarrely captivating.

Without even thinking, Blake started recording. He pulled on his old chef’s apron and, despite the oddness of it, stood in front of his kitchen counter. The camera began rolling as he confidently slid off his shirt, leaving only the apron to cover his lower half. He flexed, turned sideways, then poured olive oil into a pan with exaggerated slowness, all while making eye contact with the camera.

He added a winking emoji and a hashtag: #FYP #chefmode #StayHungry

When he posted it, he didn’t expect much. But within an hour, his phone exploded. Notifications piled up—likes, comments, and follows. His face grinned, not with his old nerdy charm, but with the cocky, entitled smirk of someone who knew they had the world at their feet. It was exhilarating.

Blake was officially a TikTok sensation.

Within weeks, Blake’s account skyrocketed. His videos got millions of views, and his followers were constantly sending in requests for more. He filmed himself making simple dishes while casually stripping off his shirt, flexing and posing, all while maintaining an air of effortless cool. His followers adored him. They showered him with compliments, thirsting over his abs, his jawline, his seemingly perfect life.

But there was something even stranger happening in Blake’s mind. As he scrolled through his For You Page, the algorithm slowly changed to reflect his new persona. The thirst traps weren’t from guys anymore. They were all from women. Beautiful, athletic women, doing everything from gym workouts to sultry dances to bikini shoots. His mind, once attuned to male attraction, was now tuned in to the allure of these women, and it felt right.

Blake didn’t just stop with cooking either. He started wearing less and less, showing off his athletic build, and posting videos of him lifting weights or doing pushups in his kitchen with nothing but an apron and a cocky grin. The thirst traps flowed endlessly, and he reveled in the attention. His followers—mostly women—were obsessed with him.

And then, one day, he noticed a particular woman’s name in his DMs. Maya Lopez. Her profile was full of glamorous pictures: her looking effortlessly stunning in dresses, lounging in parks, and posing in cute, fashionable outfits. Maya wasn’t built like the athletes or fitness influencers he’d grown accustomed to—she had a perfectly slim, graceful figure, with soft curves that made her look effortlessly elegant. Blake found himself intrigued by her sweetness, her calm confidence, and the way her beauty shone through without trying too hard.

They started chatting, and it was effortless. Maya was everything Blake found himself drawn to now: confident, kind, and undeniably attractive. Blake no longer cared about his past relationships with men. Maya was everything he wanted now, and he was more than happy to pursue it.

Blake and Maya met for their first date a week later. Blake, dressed in a tight t-shirt that showed off his sculpted abs and a leather jacket, stood waiting for Maya at the restaurant. Maya arrived, wearing a fitted dress that accentuated her slim, feminine figure, and Blake couldn’t help but be taken aback by her beauty.

They spent the evening laughing, exchanging stories of their lives, and sneaking flirtatious glances. The chemistry between them was undeniable, and by the end of the night, Blake knew he was more than just physically attracted to her. He was falling for her.

As they walked out of the restaurant, Blake leaned in close, his breath hot against her ear. “I’m not just the chef, you know,” he said with a grin. “I’m also the guy who’s going to make you feel like the queen you are.”

Maya smiled, a playful glint in her eyes. “We’ll see about that, Chef Blake. I’m not easy to impress.”

Blake’s grin widened. “Challenge accepted.”

Blake Harper, the former introverted chef, had completely embraced his new identity. He had the body, the looks, the charisma, and the woman of his dreams. His TikTok following grew exponentially as he continued to post thirst traps, flexing his muscles in the kitchen, making simple dishes while casually showing off his abs.

Maxwell Harris was long gone, replaced by a man who had it all—confidence, popularity, and Maya by his side. The past life he had built, with its quiet nights and simple joys, no longer seemed relevant.

And as Blake posted yet another shirtless video, his phone buzzing with likes and comments, he couldn’t help but feel that this was the life he was always meant to lead. No looking back.

[marigoldendragon]

Everyone's freaking out about the Twst anime having to slowly go through all the books and how we're gonna have to wait several years for the Pomefiore/Ignihyde/Diasomnia chapters. But, I'm not sure that's what they're going to be doing honestly. The crux of each season is probably going to be similar to each book, but the main plots and stories are probably going to be more intertwined.

Mostly because it won't make for good tv otherwise. Tv is a much different medium than a game that allows you to get to know the characters outside the main story, manga novels that can be produced and sold in a lot more insular way. Audiences typically don't respond well to a constantly changing cast of characters, a new protagonist/plot every season.

So I suspect we'll end up with something like oh how do I say this. The main game story but blending the books together more, with a lot more viginette style stories sprinkled throughout plus lots of set up for various character arcs? So yeah we'll probably have to wait a while to see Malleus overblot, but I dont think each season is gonna be quite so clear cut as everyone if probably fearing/picturing.

I could be wrong of course. Just thought I'd put in my two cents to help ease peoples anxieties about not seeing thier favourites in action.

This might help, I don't know if I'm doing a good job describing it in words so I scribbled out a visual. I guess what I'm trying to say is that ideally they'll weave all 7 of the Twst plots into one.

[arc-misadventures]

A Rebranding

Jaune: Jessica.

Jessica: Jaune...?Jaune! You're here! You're...? Uhhh... W-Who are you?

Coco: Hello.

Jessica: Hi...?

Jaune: Coco here is my partner...

Jessica: P-Partner...?

Jaune: Yes, she is my partner in the, 'Beacons Fashion Trio.'

Jessica: Oh thank gods... not that kind of partner...

Coco: Don't hold your breath love~!

Jessica: EEP?! Y-You head me?!

Jaune: We are here to judge your outfit, and render judgement upon you.

Jessica: J-Judgement...?

Coco: Yes, and be warned; Our judgement bares quite severe consequences...

Jessica: Consequences...? W-What kind of consequences...?

Jaune: Worry not... unless you have something to worry about...?

Jessica: N-N-No... I think...?

Jaune: The judgement begins... with, Jessica's current outfit...

Coco: ...

Jessica: Please have mercy...

Coco: ...

Coco: You look...

Jessica: EEEEEE!?!

Coco: So adorable!

Jessica: Wha...?

Coco: You look so adorable! Oh, I love the shades of greens, are complementized beautifully by the whites, and blacks! And, your hair! I love this shade of green in your hair it is fantastic! And, this mark around your eye! GODS! You are so adorable I could eat you up!

Jessica: W-Wha...?

Jaune: I told you you'd like her outfit. I didn't expect you to like it that much though.

Coco: It's fantastic! I have yet to see a terrible outfit! Why did you want me to judge this adorable hamster!

Jessica: H-Hamster?

Jaune: Well, I wanted you to see her outfit, and how cute, Jessica is...

Jessica: You think I'm cute~?

Jaune: But, I wanted you to judge her super hero 'outfit.'

Coco: Her what?'

Jessica: Oh, he's talking about this:

Coco: HISSSS!!!

Coco: What is that ungodly abomination?!

Jessica: W-What?

Coco: I see seven different styles clashing colours clashing?! Why would they dress you up like that?!

Jaune: Actually... The green ring thingy makes her outfit based on her thoughts... This... thing was her idea...

Coco: (GASP?!)

Coco: You made that thing yourself?!

Jessica: Y-Y-Yes...?

Coco: ...?!

Coco: BURN IT WITH FIRE! BURN HER ALONG WITH IT!!! CLEANSE THE UNIVERSE OF THIS ABOMINATION!!! NOW?!!?!?!

Jaune: Now now. Coco... We're not doing that. We're here to fix this... And, I have an idea how to fix this... Oi! Stop biting me!

Coco: Let me at her! Let me destroy the cute hamster!

Jaune: No. You'll be sad if you destroy the cute hamster. And, at potential fashion redesign... Probably more than that one...

Coco: Fashion redesign...?

Jaune: Yes... We can think of a new outfit for her to wear, one that isn't an ungodly abomination.

Coco: A non-ungodly abomination...

Jaune: And, I have a perfect idea for an outfit.

Coco: You do?

Jaune: Yes. This one...

Coco: ...?

Jessica: ...?

Jaune: So what do you two think of it?

Coco: ...

Jessica: ...

Coco: I love it!

Jessica: Its gorgeous!

Jaune: Ha, knew it.

Jessica: I can change my outfit right now!

Jessica: How do I look?! How do I look?!

Coco: OHH~! That's such an elegant outfit on you, Jessica! The colours compliment you so perfectly! I love it so much! You look beautiful!

Jessica: this is the coolest outfit I ever wore in my whole life! Everyone is going to be so jealous of my awesome style! Jaune thank you so much! This new outfit is amazing!

Coco: I agree with, Jessica, Jaune. That is a beautiful outfit. You've out done yourself.

Jaune: To be fair, anything is better than her previous outfit.

Coco: True. So, Jessica you up to celebrating a new outfit?

Jessica: Sure!

Jessica: ...

Jessica: How?

Coco: First: We strip, Jaune of his~!

Jaune: For a new outfit right?

Coco: (Wiggles eyebrows~!)

Jaune: For a new outfit right...?

Jessica: Let's do this!

Jaune: Oh no...

[erinwantstowrite]

hey so what is thors relationship with peter?

like he knows nat and stuff but has he ever had like frequent interaction with thor??

they're good friends!! i've been trying to figure out their exact dynamic for a while now, and i've started to feel like Thor wouldn't be the greatest mentor to peter, but a weird uncle (in the good way to have a weird uncle). only because there's like... Thor is still figuring out how humans work and what breaks them, etc, and then human children are harder to figure out. especially considering peter is a human teenager who's also part spider. not Thor's area of expertise. he's a good warrior and an avenger, so he lives at the Tower and very often interacts with Peter to spars with him, etc. but Peter has a very different fighting style than Thor does- Peter's a lot more sneaky and is still a little worried about relying on his full strength in a fight. so it'll be a while before peter could go to Thor and ask "okay: brute strength and warrior tactics, what do i do?" he's more defined in very precise fighting techniques and clever tricks, making him a great pupil for Natasha and Tony over anyone else. the closest anyone on the team could get to understanding Peter's new abilities is Steve, in a way, so that's another of his primary mentors. Thor's the kind of guy that tells Peter stories about his life, his home, and the other Avengers and Peter eats up every word. he's like an uncle that isn't scared to roughhouse with you and throw you around, but he's not interacting with Peter on the daily and teaching him. mostly because i've been writing the Avengers around the 2012 era (with a lot of tweaking and erin-style changes), and I'm pretty sure Thor was still learning about himself in that era

[cvt2dvm]

Reducing consumption over all is an obvious first step in supporting solidarity for women on a global scale. However, we can also take this a few steps further:

1. Cutting fast fashion out of your life entirely, major brand offenders are Shien, Forever 21, house brands for department stores (A New Day or Wild Fable at Target as an example), Instagram Pop Up Brands, Fashionnova, etc.

2. Where you do consume, look for certifications in regards to the labor and materials utilized Fair Trade, OkoTex, Rainforest Alliance Certified, Fair Wear Foundation, etc. Good on You is an app that simplifies a lot of the process though they automatically rate brands that utilize animal products as all equally bad in spite of varied practices on animal products (as someone who wears leather (bought and self processed) & fur (self processed) I find this a flaw with the app's ranking system) they have ratings for environmental impact, labor, animal products that makes shopping a bit easier.

3. When you do consume, aim for locally-owned and women-owned brands. Avoid allowing male owned and dominated corporate conglomerates to be the end point of women's dollars.

4. Look for quality products that will last longer than just a season, and try to avoid falling for trends that rise and fall, this is easier to do if you have a personal sense of style rather than one that is constantly fluctuating and changing with trends. I personally tend to stick with a more mature version of the "preppy" look somewhere between what would be considered Classic Americana and English Countrywear.

5. Avoid synthetic materials: most synthetics are petroleum based and shed microplastics affecting both your health and the health of our planet. If you do go for a synthetic or synthetic blend, try to aim for recycled synthetics. This has gotten increasingly difficult to do, but is still fairly easy to check for, just look at the labels and laundering instructions.

One facet of female solidarity that needs more discussion is anti consumerism and anti consumption. Our current western mindset is one of obtaining as much as possible, both as a show of wealth and for personal comfort. However, much of what we buy (for example, fast fashion) is produced in a non-transparent supply chain that frequently relies on female and Global South labor to make goods cheap and easily affordable, and thus more tempting for the consumer. These low wages that are paid to workers result in economic desperation and trap women in poorly paid, often abusive positions. Additionally, women and children are the most at risk from the negative effects of climate change, which is exacerbated by industrialization and over production.

By consuming less we reduce support for these predatory supply chains and their deleterious effects on the environment. Ideally if we buy goods, they are from female owned businesses whenever possible. Personally I also avoid spending money on items that enforce the beauty standard (this includes makeup, uncomfortable or impractical clothes or shoes, and cosmetic procedures). Essentially, what ways could you support female solidarity through consumption habits?

[kyu-piddy]

Messy love triangles….

Leona x reader x riddle mayhaps⁉️

Ranking a singular twst love triangle on how messy it is

An: The more I write for Leona the more I find this man hilarious. Who knew petty men were this funny to write about?

Gn reader x Riddle, Leona

Trigger warnings: Swearing

900 words

Riddle vs Leona

There’s people that you wonder how they have beef. They’re not opposites, they’re not too similar, but there’s something that doesn’t quite click with them.

In the case of Riddle and Leona, their beef is over you.

Riddle is a fool I tell you. He might be a great student, he might be Mr perfect in anything and everything pertaining to stuff your parents would be proud of, but he is indeed a fool.

He will, very loudly and stupidly, call you his good friend to the Heartslabyul dorm while blushing up a storm as soon as you’re less than 10 feet away from him.

You were commenting in passing to Ace and Deuce how the history of magic assignment is really hard? There comes Riddle in the next morning carrying back breaking books on the topic, with sticky notes color coded to how important he thought that information was.

Did you complain about not being able to sleep properly? Riddle has brewed you a potion that is said to help sleep and prepared a brochure with every habit of yours that is making sleep evade you.

And yet he is not using the evidence to reach a sound verdict. He is instead looking pretty stupid and/or overbearing to everyone around him.

Trey and Cater are laughing their asses off at the interactions between you both.

If it was someone else it could be heavily considered that they were faking it, but it’s Riddle after all.

Mr. Lionman is, like always, emotionally constipated as hell.

Leona might be lazy as balls, but he is no idiot. He’s actually rather brilliant and also not blind, so the moment he sees Riddle interact with you, it’s on sight.

Verbally that is. Leona isn’t that trigger happy with people that he could snap like a twig.

He probably already suspected Riddle's crush on you just by hearing you talk, which he did in fact make an effort to stay awake for, but actually seeing the red short stack turn into a human prawn would piss him off sooooo bad.

This man is incredibly petty. He has never once actually tried in his classes, but seeing as that would make Riddle mad, he’s showing up at 8:00 am on the dot to every class and scoring 100 after 100 in every test he can.

Meanwhile Riddle’s jaw is glued to the floor.

He doesn’t really understand why Leona is rubbing his successes in his face, which does piss him off, but what pisses him off the most is how Leona is showing it off to you too??? How dare he!

Riddle should be the one that comes to you with his perfect tests, offering help all gentleman style.

Treys sweets are another weapon in Riddle's arsenal, but Leona is indeed a cheeky bastard that practices the age old “all is fair in love and war”.

Ruggie is going to be very busy making sure those sweets taste awful, and also trying to feed you with stuff “Leona” made.

Speaking of Trey, he’s going to have to make a decorated cake saying “You like ____” for his housewarden. Otherwise man will stay in the dark.

It is shocking news to Riddle once he figures it out, while everyone else sort of just… nods their heads and pretend it is such riveting new information.

“Trey, I have delved deep into my psyche and have reached the conclusion that my feelings for ___ aren’t exclusively platonic.”

“Oh, really now, Riddle?”

oH reALly NoW RiDdLe

Leona is also a contender for the most obvious crush on campus to those that know him.

Ruggie and Jack probably have a bet going on when Leona will confess. (Jack thinks it will be when the sun explodes. Ruggie is more akin to the hypothesis of the heat death of the universe coming first.)

Riddle is the one most likely to confess.

He believes in doing things the proper way so confessing is the way to go.

Man is redder than his hair and holding a script he wrote.

It’s really sweet actually. Riddle isn't some romantic bard of legend, but he writes down his feelings in the best way he can: with legal jargon.

Leona’s sixth sense is activating and he is running to match his rival.

Once again, metaphorically. He can’t be bothered to actually run.

He is putting his head on your shoulder, whispering into your ear…

“I know you like me, herbivore.”

Hell no! This man did not spend the time he did around you and planning how to get your attention to turn back around and say it’s you who is in love with him! Step on his tail or knee him on the groin cuz he deserves it.

For a Leona love triangle, this one isn’t that bad. I’d give it an A.

Any love triangle with two overblot boys tends to be really messed up, even after said overblot, but Leona and Riddle don’t have that much prior beef that turns the love triangle into a biohazard.

Leona will have his good ol inferiority complex to keep him company if rejected, but he doesn’t feel like he is in that much direct competition with Riddle, which spares him some of the heartache that a love triangle with Vil or Malleus would give.

Riddle will be haunted by his perfectionism and romantic stupidity if rejected, but he’s one of the more stable post overblot boys, so you don’t have much to fear. Probably.

[dissapointu]

hiii! i was wondering if u could do arcane characters reacting to a partner with really long hair! my hair is like 30 inches and im so tempted to cut ittt but brings out my face and my nose piercing 😓 i loveee uu and i love ur writing!!

Thank you so much for your kind words! I’m glad you enjoy my writing. Here are the reactions of the Arcane characters to a partner with really long hair:

————————————————————————

Jinx

Jinx absolutely adores your long hair. She’s always trying to braid it or mess with it in some way. When she sees you running your fingers through your hair, she’s immediately fascinated.

“Whoa! Look at all that hair!” she says, tugging at a strand curiously. “How do you even deal with all of it? I bet you could make a whole new weapon with this much!”

She’ll probably try to get you to let her style it in all kinds of wild ways, and when she gets distracted, she’ll just end up wrapping herself in it like a cozy blanket. She also loves that it frames your face beautifully, making you look even cooler in her eyes.

Vi

Vi is more practical about it. She’ll run her hands through your hair and give you a smile. “This much hair? Damn, you must have patience,” she says with a teasing smirk.

But when she sees how gorgeous it looks when you pull it up or let it flow freely, she’s completely in awe. “You know, I bet it’d look real cute in a ponytail. Wanna try that out?”

She secretly loves how soft it feels against her skin when she holds you close. Vi might not fully understand the maintenance, but she loves your hair because it’s a part of you.

Sevika

Sevika is a bit aloof but can’t help but be impressed by your long hair. She’s the type to touch it without asking, her fingers brushing through it almost absentmindedly.

“That’s a lot of hair you’ve got there,” she says, her voice softening a bit as she runs her hand through the strands. “Must take you forever to wash it.”

Despite her rough exterior, Sevika enjoys the feeling of your hair slipping through her fingers, and she’ll often find herself absentmindedly playing with it when she’s not paying attention.

Silco

Silco’s reactions to your long hair are a mix of admiration and possessiveness. He’s quite taken by how it moves and frames your face, subtly making you look even more beautiful in his eyes.

“Your hair,” he starts, his voice dark and low, “it’s as much a part of you as your eyes.”

He’ll gently push a lock of hair behind your ear, gazing at you in a way that makes you feel like you’re the only person in the room. Silco isn’t the type to get too physical, but he does love the way your hair adds to your elegance and presence.

Vander

Vander is absolutely charmed by your long hair. He’s always been a fan of natural beauty, and he finds it endearing when you let your hair flow freely.

“You’ve got beautiful hair, sweetheart,” he says with a warm smile, brushing a strand away from your face. “It suits you.”

He might even help you take care of it, offering to hold it back for you when you’re busy or give you a gentle hand to fix a loose strand. Vander appreciates the way your hair complements your natural elegance and strength.

Ekko

Ekko loves your hair, but not just because it’s long. He loves how it’s a part of your identity, how it expresses your personality.

“Whoa, your hair’s longer than mine!” he laughs, running his hand through it and tugging it playfully. “You could totally hide in there if you wanted.”

He’s also fascinated by how you take care of it, always asking about your routine, even offering to help wash it. Ekko finds it mesmerizing, especially when it catches the light as you move. He’ll often be found absentmindedly twirling a lock of it between his fingers.

Jayce

Jayce is the kind of person who would find your long hair absolutely stunning. He can’t help but admire it when it’s down, how it adds to your grace and beauty.

“I’m not even sure how you deal with it all, but you make it look effortless,” he says, genuinely impressed.

He’ll be the type to offer you hair ties or ask if you need help fixing it. Jayce loves to see it styled in different ways and will always compliment how it frames your face, especially when you wear it down, letting it cascade over your shoulders.

Viktor

Viktor loves the elegance your long hair brings to your appearance, but he’s also very gentle about it. He’s often seen running his fingers through it when he’s close, marveling at the softness.

“How do you manage it?” he asks, his voice curious but sincere. “It’s beautiful, but I imagine it’s a lot of work.”

He may not always understand the effort that goes into maintaining long hair, but he will definitely appreciate the care you put into it. He’s very careful when he touches it, knowing how special it is to you.

Caitlyn

Caitlyn is totally captivated by your long hair. She loves how it flows when you move, and she finds herself twirling a strand between her fingers when you’re close.

“Your hair’s like, perfect,” she says, giving you a soft smile. “How do you get it so shiny?”

She’s always offering you cute little hair accessories—anything from ribbons to barrettes—to complement your style. Caitlyn’s constantly in awe of how effortlessly you look with such long hair, and she enjoys seeing you play with it or wear it in different ways.

Mel Medarda

Mel is the type who appreciates beauty in all its forms, and your long hair is no exception. She admires how well you maintain it and often finds herself admiring it, whether it’s styled or flowing freely.

“It suits you,” she says quietly, her eyes lingering on the way it frames your face. “Your hair is as striking as your presence.”

She’d never make a big deal of it, but Mel will always show subtle appreciation for how your hair enhances your natural beauty, perhaps even asking you for tips on maintaining it.

Ambessa Medarda

Ambessa is regal and will always notice when you present yourself with such care. Your long hair gives you a dignified aura that she can’t help but respect.

“Your hair,” she starts, her voice commanding, “is a mark of your strength and beauty. It speaks volumes about who you are.”

She enjoys running her fingers through it when she’s in a rare moment of tenderness, admiring how it complements your elegance. Ambessa is the type to consider it a part of your power, and she holds it in high regard.

Maddie Nolen

Maddie is immediately taken with your hair, seeing it as an extension of your grace. When you run your fingers through it, she can’t help but smile.

“Your hair’s amazing,” she says softly, always offering to help if it’s getting in the way. “How do you get it to look so perfect?”

Maddie will always help with tying it up, offering her own hair accessories, and when you let it down, she’s completely in awe. She enjoys how it catches the light and enhances your beauty, always finding new ways to tell you how stunning you are.

Lest

Lest finds your long hair mesmerizing, often running her fingers through it absentmindedly when you’re close.

“Your hair is… stunning,” she says, voice soft but filled with admiration. “How do you keep it so beautiful?”

She’s fascinated by the way it looks when it moves, the way it enhances your face. Lest will often braid small sections of your hair or tie it back for you when you’re busy, always cherishing the beauty it adds to your overall presence.

[accio-victuuri]

read a book for me. 📚

inspired by people who were curious about the books featured in xz’s video, let’s take a look at what they are. i’d like to think these were pre approved by XZ and are related to his interests. i’m not removing tge possibility that one of these were chosen by someone from xzs or the director himself. i’m tagging this as cpn because there will be some cpn. if you don’t wanna go that route and just enjoy learning about the titles featured, then go ahead. 😉

1. Restoration House by Kennesha Bucks

You don't have to live in your dream house to make your living spaces feel more like home. Home is meant to be a place to belong. A place to gather and connect. A place of beauty. A place to restore your soul. In Restoration House, author and designer Kennesha Buycks will encourage you to embrace your home and your story so you can create mindful spaces that give life to you, your loved ones, and all who enter.

2. LORI WILDE

that red book just says the author’s name and no actual title but if you look her up, she’s all about that romance novel. here is her website if you wanna know what i mean. if you move a bit, the spine of it says “boy” so i think it maybe one of those books that has the cowboys in it!

3. Next is LIT UP, which is a black book. I’m not so sure if it’s a real book and when you search it, there are a couple of contenders. Tho i personally gravitate towards p2 since it’s black and the plot of the story is something i think XZ will enjoy!

it says out of the cubicle and into the real world, it’s like him getting out of his work cubicle years ago and discovering the world.

book overview:

Eddy Gilmore found himself on society’s fringe after being exiled from Corporate America. Despite years of higher education and exemplary service inside a cubicle’s pixelated world, he had no tangible or transferable skills to offer his community. Amazingly, failure was the door into tapping dreams and gifts that had long been ignored as impractical.

This true to life adventure is a pilgrimage into the real world, a place where neighbors make and produce things that sustain life and bring joy. When their eyes were opened to the talents all around them, Eddy and his wife discovered how to produce value themselves, and sank roots into the community. By working together, they are building a life they might never need to retire from.

4. The Interior Design Handbook

Frida Ramstedt believes in thinking about how we decorate, rather than focusing on what we decorate with. We know more today than ever before about design trends, furniture, and knickknacks, and now Frida familiarizes readers with the basic principles behind interior and styling—what looks good and, most of all, why it looks good.

The Interior Design Handbook teaches you general rules of thumb—like what the golden ratio and the golden spiral are, the proper size for a coffee table in relation to your sofa, the optimal height to hang lighting fixtures, and the best ways to use a mood board—complete with helpful illustrations. Use The Interior Design Handbook to achieve a balanced, beautiful home no matter where you live or what your style is.

5. Limits of the Known

A celebrated mountaineer and author searches for meaning in great adventures and explorations, past and present.

David Roberts, "veteran mountain climber and chronicler of adventures" (Washington Post), has spent his career documenting voyages to the most extreme landscapes on earth. In Limits of the Known, he reflects on humanity’s—and his own—relationship to extreme risk. Part memoir and part history, this book tries to make sense of why so many have committed their lives to the desperate pursuit of adventure.

In the wake of his diagnosis with throat cancer, Roberts seeks answers with sharp new urgency. He explores his own lifelong commitment to adventuring, as well as the cultural contributions of explorers throughout history: What specific forms of courage and commitment did it take for Fridtjof Nansen to survive an eighteen-month journey from a record "farthest north" with no supplies and a single rifle during his polar expedition of 1893–96? What compelled Eric Shipton to return, five times, to the ridges of Mt. Everest, plotting the mountain’s most treacherous territory years before Hillary and Tenzing’s famous ascent? What drove Bill Stone to dive 3,000 feet underground into North America’s deepest cave?

What motivates the explorers we most admire, who are willing to embark on perilous journeys and push the limits of the human body? And what is the future of adventure in a world we have mapped and trodden from end to end?

6. Eat, Drink, Nap: Bringing the House Home

The quintessential style, cooking, and home interior book from Soho House, the world's leading members' club.

Since the first Soho House opened its doors over 25 years ago, we've learnt a bit about what works. Contemporary, global yet with something quintessentially English and homely at its heart, this is Soho House style explained by its experts:

- From planning a room to vintage finds: bringing the Soho House look home.

- Our House curator's advice on how to buy, collect and hang art.

- The art of a great night's sleep: how to design the perfect bedroom.

- No-fuss recipes and chef's tips: here's how to make your favourite House dishes.

- Inside Babington: our take on country-house living. Wellies optional.

- Flip-flop glamour and poolside style from Soho House Miami Beach.

- All the secrets of cocktail hour: House tonics and barman's tips.

- Spa treatment at home, DIY facials and chocolate brownies.

Eat Drink Nap, a 300-page highly illustrated book, with a foreword from founder Nick Jones, and photography from leading food and interiors photographers Mark Seelen and Jean Cazals, shares the Soho House blueprint for stylish, modern living, the Soho House way.

7. Styled

It’s easy to find your own style confidence once you know this secret: While decorating can take months and tons of money, styling often takes just minutes. Even a few little tweaks can transform the way your room feels.

At the heart of Styled are Emily Henderson’s ten easy steps to styling any space. From editing out what you don’t love to repurposing what you can’t live without to arranging the most eye-catching vignettes on any surface, you’ll learn how to make your own style magic.

With Emily’s style diagnostic, insider tips, and more than 1,000 unique ideas from 75 envy-inducing rooms, you’ll soon be styling like you were born to do it.

8. The other book i’m seeing is WINTER TID then it cuts off so again it’s tricky to confirm what it is! My best guess is WINTER TIDE but if you google that — i can’t connect how XZ will read that lol.

EDIT: adding this one seen from the alternate MV,

The Tale of the Body Thief by Anne Rice

is a vampire novel by American writer Anne Rice, the fourth in her The Vampire Chronicles series, following The Queen of the Damned (1988). Published in 1992, it continues the adventures of Lestat, specifically his efforts to regain his lost humanity during the late 20th century.

=========

now let’s look at the CPN.

i see fans saying the style related books could be because of his work before. but he is more of a digital and design artist right? he does logos and stuff that can help their brand identity. i don’t remember him being an interior designer. there is also the eat, drink, nap which has topics on cooking and being a good host. these books are making me clown so hard! my head canon is xz is keeping himself busy ( as if he is not busy enough already ) with designing their home. his and wyb’s — if that wasn’t clear enough, that’s what i’m insinuating. if he isn’t traveling, i would imagine he is the type who just wants to spend time at home in between jobs. it is their home. their sanctuary. so xz would make sure that it is according to what they both want and that it’s stylish.

and when he is at home sipping wine, while waiting for Bobo, is he reading a LORI WILDE BOOK? lol. sexy millionaire cowboy you say? 👀👀👀👀

😂😂😂😂😂

or reading something like the LIT UP book which is more up his alley ( but again i’m not sure if this is the exact title )

what is out of place is limits of the known. out of place compared to the theme of the other books, but xz is someone who is into nature and climbing of sorts. but i haven’t seen him climb the way yibo did in ETU. the most popular cpn is that this is yibo’s contribution to the selection. or maybe he read it after yibo and liked it. OR he is also becoming interested in rock climbing — which is not a far off possibility.

-END.

[positivelyholland]

Can we get a Styles-Swift reader! imagine in honor of Liam Payne?

Steady Hands in the Storm

Pairing: Harry Styles x daughter!reader

Genre: slight angst into fluff

Warnings: kinda a heavy one but it has a happy ending

A/N YALL IM BACK Word Count: 7,243

The house was unusually quiet. The kind of silence that feels heavy, pressing down on every surface. You sat at the kitchen table, absentmindedly stirring a spoon through your cup of tea. It had gone cold a while ago, but you hadn’t noticed. Not really. All your focus was on your father, who was sitting across from you.

He was hunched over, elbows on the table, his head in his hands. His curls looked messier than usual, like he hadn’t bothered to tame them today. You’d noticed the little things over the past few days—the way he moved slower, the way his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes anymore. Even the way his voice sounded softer, like the energy had drained out of him.

You knew why, of course. The news had hit everyone hard. Liam Payne, your dad’s former bandmate, had passed away unexpectedly. And even though it had been years since One Direction had been a band, those boys were still family to him. Losing Liam felt like losing a part of himself.

“Dad,” you said softly, your voice barely breaking the stillness.

He didn’t look up, but you saw his shoulders tense slightly.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” he mumbled, his voice hoarse.

You sighed, setting your spoon down with a soft clink. You knew him well enough to understand that he wasn’t trying to shut you out. He just didn’t know how to put what he was feeling into words.

So, you decided to try a different approach.

“Do you remember that time Liam came over for Christmas when I was, like, six?” you said, leaning back in your chair. “He spent the whole day teaching me how to do a handstand in the living room. Mum was furious because we kept knocking over the decorations.”

That got a small huff of a laugh out of your dad, though he still didn’t lift his head.

“I thought she was going to banish him from the house forever,” you added with a grin.

“He kept apologizing every five minutes,” your dad muttered, finally looking up. His green eyes were red-rimmed, and you could tell he hadn’t slept much. “But then he’d just… try again. Said you were getting better every time.”

You smiled softly, nodding. “I did get better. All because of him.”

The room fell quiet again, but it didn’t feel as heavy this time. You could see your dad’s shoulders relax a little, his hands falling to rest on the table.

“He was so good with you,” Harry said after a moment. “Always patient. Always kind.”

You reached across the table, placing your hand over his. “He loved you, Dad. All of you. I think you meant as much to him as he did to you.”

Your dad swallowed hard, his jaw clenching as he tried to keep his emotions in check.

“It just… it doesn’t feel real,” he admitted, his voice cracking. “I keep thinking I’ll wake up and… and he’ll call or text, and it’ll all have been some kind of awful dream.”

You squeezed his hand gently. “I know. But he wouldn’t want you to carry this alone. You’ve always told me that grief is lighter when you share it.”

He gave you a faint smile, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes but was a start.

“Why are you so wise for a teenager?” he asked, his voice tinged with warmth.

You shrugged, trying to keep the mood light. “I get it from Mum. Obviously.”

That earned you a soft chuckle, and for a moment, it felt like the cloud hanging over the room lifted just a little.

Over the next few days, you made it your mission to help your dad through his grief, even if he didn’t realize it. It was little things at first—making sure he ate, suggesting you watch one of Liam’s favorite movies together, or putting on some music to fill the silence.

But as time went on, you noticed that your dad seemed to be retreating into himself more. He’d spend hours in his studio, not working on anything, just sitting there with his guitar in his lap. You’d find him staring out the window, lost in thought, or holding his phone like he was waiting for a call that would never come.

It broke your heart to see him like this, so you decided to take a more direct approach.

One evening, you found him in the living room, staring at an old photo album. You sat down next to him without a word, leaning against his shoulder as you looked at the pictures. Most of them were from his One Direction days—grainy selfies, group shots from concerts, and candids of the boys goofing around backstage.

“Did you ever think those days would end?” you asked softly.

He shook his head. “Not really. We were so young, so caught up in it all. It felt like it would last forever.”

“But you’re still close,” you pointed out. “You and Louis talk all the time. And Niall sends those ridiculous videos that make you laugh so hard you cry.”

He smiled faintly at that. “Yeah. And Zayn… well, we’ve reconnected a bit over the years. It’s not the same as it was, but there’s still love there.”

You nodded, flipping the page to a picture of Liam holding a microphone, his face lit up with a big, toothy grin. “He’d be proud of you, you know. For everything you’ve done. For the way you’ve been there for everyone else, even when it’s hard for you.”

Your dad’s eyes filled with tears, and he quickly wiped them away, his hand trembling slightly.

“I just… I feel like I should’ve done more,” he admitted. “Checked in more often, made more of an effort to keep in touch. Maybe if I had, things would’ve been different.”

You shook your head firmly. “No, Dad. You can’t think like that. You loved him, and he knew that. Sometimes, life just… happens. It’s not anyone’s fault.”

He looked at you then, his eyes searching yours for some kind of reassurance. “How’d you get so good at this?” he asked, his voice thick with emotion.

“Years of listening to your music,” you teased, earning a watery laugh from him.

A few weeks later, your dad had a concert scheduled—a big one, with thousands of fans waiting to see him. You weren’t sure if he was ready to perform, but he insisted that the show must go on.

That night, as you stood backstage, you could feel the nervous energy radiating off him. He kept pacing, running his hands through his hair and mumbling to himself.

“Dad,” you said, stepping in front of him to stop his pacing. “You’ve got this.”

He looked down at you, his green eyes wide and uncertain. “What if I break down in the middle of it? What if I can’t do it?”

“You will,” you said confidently. “Because you’re doing this for him. And because he’d want you to.”

He took a deep breath, nodding slowly. “You’re right. You’re absolutely right.”

As the lights dimmed and the crowd erupted into cheers, your dad turned to you one last time. “Stay close, yeah?”

“Always,” you promised.

The concert started off strong, with your dad pouring his heart into every song. The crowd loved him, cheering and singing along to every word. But it wasn’t until halfway through the set that he finally addressed the elephant in the room.

“This next one…” he began, his voice shaking slightly. “This next one is for someone very special to me. Someone who’s no longer with us, but who will always be a part of my heart.”

The stadium fell silent, the weight of his words sinking in.

“I miss you, mate,” he said softly, his voice cracking. “This one’s for you.”

He started to play, his voice raw with emotion as he sang a song he’d written just for Liam. The lyrics were beautiful, filled with love and pain and memories of the friendship they’d shared. By the time he finished, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house—including yours.

When he walked off stage, you were there waiting for him, your arms open wide. He pulled you into a tight hug, holding on like you were his lifeline.

“Thank you,” he whispered, his voice thick with gratitude. “For everything.”

You smiled against his shoulder, tears streaming down your face. “Always, Dad. Always.”

In that moment, you knew that while the pain of losing Liam would never fully go away, your dad would be okay. Because he wasn’t alone. He had you, and he had the love and memories of a bond that could never be broken.

And that was enough.

The End.

[liveyun]

you’re an idiot (so am i) | j.jk

pairing. jeon jungkook x fem oc/reader

rating. M

genre. enemies to 👀, university AU, neighbours AU, comedy, drama, romance, angst, slight smut

warnings. coarse language, crACK like lOTS OF IT, theyre both idiots. excessive bickering,,, gym related stuff,,, Medical school itself is a warning,, unhealthy amounts of protein mentions,, i’m Sorry if you’re a gymbro 😭🙏🏾, awkwardness, oc gets slightly injured, it gets slightly smutty 👀, unspoken feelings bc they both suck at communicating, some Cute stuff, that should be it but lmk if i missed any, its 4am

wc. 4.5k +

if this writing style flops, i’ll probably quit writing too 💀

it’s 7:04 AM

or is it really. what is the time again

unfortunately you are awake.

and it’s not by choice.

it’s because your protein 💪 PROTEIN 💪 MORE PROTEIN 🏋️ gymrat neighbour is up, doing burpees in his living room

and the walls between your apartments are criminally thin

and you’re convinced he’s trying to invent a new form of torture through burpees because the sQUEAKING OF HIS DAMN SHOES ARE JUST AS LOUD AS AN ALARM CLOCK!!

why is he even awake at this ungodly hour, you wonder for the 8293838th time since moving in

you feel like crying

for rEAL.

it was around 5:30 am when u finally had let out a sigh of relief at having finally completed your assignment

you roll out of bed, hair resembling a bird’s nest

what else is bed hair supposed to look like

“O YEA!”

here we go

again

you feel like ripping your already damaged hair bc why does he have to be so damn loud

has no occupant not filed a complaint against him yet?

so now u consider knocking on his door to complain... but you remember what happened the last time you tried

jungkook had answered the door holding two dumbbells liKe they were extensions of his arms, shirtless, smiling so brightly it could cure vitamin D deficiency

you knew you were cooked the moment smirked at you gawkinG at his physique and you felt your cheeks warming up

“oh, hey, Y/N,” he’d said, casually flexing mid-sentence with that stupid grin on his face “need something? Or just admiring the view?”

you haven’t known peace ever since

by 8:15 AM, you’ve surrendered to fate and shuffled into the kitchen for coffee

you swEar you hear Jungkook’s blender whirring as he makes another one of his infamous protein shakes

does he even eat anything which does not have protein powder

like ok you understand the value of protein

but anything which has that stupid thing in it automatically tastes like the Biggest Piece of Dogshit

and somehow that’s what you neighbour has 24/7

last week he had accidentally left one in the communal fridge

it smelled like death and regret.

absolute L

anyway u think u need to get something in ur system too and thats when u open your fridge

and sigh

it’s empty.

except for a jar of pickles and a, uh, questionable carton of oat milk

yea. you’ll have to get brunch today. no futher questions asked

10:32 AM

ur first class of the day

and guess what

u have made the mistake of sitting near Jungkook in the lecture hall.

again! 😍

u swear that u are trying to focus on the lecture but is it really your fault that jungkook looks extra,,,...,,,

beefy

his notebook is open, but instead of notes, he’s drawing a disturbingly accurate diagram of biceps

and the shading looks pretty accurate too

he notices you staring, oof “anatomy is about more than just books, Y/N.”

you feel a muscle near your eye twitch

“i really don’t remember asking.”

ouch

that came out a bit too rude. . .

you feel like u should say sorry or something but he just flashes you that golden retriever grin

and somehow, you’re the one who feels stupid

12:10 PM

you’d think a med school lunch break would feel like a break

but no

the first thing you hear is the unmistakable pop of jungkook’s tupperware lid. it’s like pavlov’s bell, but instead of a dog, it triggers your impending irritation

of course it’s chicken, broccoli, and rice. gymrat starter pack™

does this man even know other foods exist?

atleast it doesn’t look unseasoned so maybe you can take it

you’re not the one having it anyway

“bon appétit,” he says with that smug grin, shoveling a forkful into his mouth like he’s filming a mukbang

you side-eye your sad excuse of a sandwich. “don’t you ever get bored of eating that?”

he gasps like a victorian man having seen the ankle of his wife for the first time

“bored? of gains? never.”

the chewing. oh god, the chewing. it’s so loud you’re convinced he’s doing it on purpose

crunch. chew. sip of water from the world’s largest bottle. repeat.

“do you have to eat like a vacuum?”

he pauses, fork mid-air, and looks at you with wide, innocent eyes. then he grins. “do you have to be this cute when you’re annoyed?”

wha— cough!!

did you just choke at your sandwich infront of him?

-100 aura points

your brain just blue-screens

what the hell are you supposed to do with that information

12:22 pm

you haven’t touched your chips yet. you’re saving them for after jungkook’s food massacre ends

his tupperware is licked clean but he’s already eyeing your bag of chips like a hawk

“you gonna eat those?”

“yes, jungkook, i’m gonna eat my chips”

“cool”

c r u n c h

he’s already eaten half the bag.

u are genuinely considering homicide now

the girl from the next table suddenly waves at him, all giggly and twirling her hair like she’s auditioning for a romcom

“hey, jungkook! you should totally sit with us!”

he glances at you, one brow raised. “should i?”

“why are you asking me?” you snap, already annoyed (but like, annoyed in a normal way, not jealous. definitely not jealous)

you miss the way his lips quirk in the corners

“nah, i think i’ll stay here,” he says, smirking. “you’re better company anyway”

...

why is your face heating up. why. stop it

1:00 PM

you’re walking to your next class when jungkook catches up, sipping his protein shake. the smell is somewhere between expired yogurt and pure evil

“so, lunch was fun,” he says casually, like he didn’t commit multiple crimes against your sanity earlier

“for who?” you mumble, giving him the nastiest bombastic side eye

“for both of us,” he replies, grinning. “don’t lie, y/n, you’d miss me if i wasn’t around”

“i’d miss the peace”

he laughs heartily and it’s the kind of laugh that makes you want to both strangle him and maybe... smile a little

1:12 PM

ur phone dings

dumb(bell)kook : (now) bring more chips tomorrow

or don’t. i’ll just steal them again

>:D

you stare at your screen for a second, debating whether to respond or block his number

you type back

you : (1:13PM) touch my chips again and i’ll report you to student conduct

his reply is instant.

dumb(bell)kook : (now) bet they’d let me off for good behavior 😛

2:47 pm.

group project time!

otherwise known as “watch y/n slowly lose her sanity” time

you're hunched over your notes, trying to come up with literally anything for this cursed assignment while everyone else is glued to their phones

“guys, any ideas?” you try, for the fifth time, because teamwork makes the dream work, right?

wrong. dead silence. you can practically hear your soul exiting your body

one guy mutters, "we could... idk, make a powerpoint?" and goes back to scrolling on instagram. helpful king

you’re about three seconds away from making a powerpoint on why you hate everyone here when the door swings open

in walks jungkook, twenty minutes late, balancing a protein shake in one hand and a clipboard in the other

like he’s about to announce his plan for world domination

he slides into the chair next to you, annoyingly fresh, as if he hasn’t just already benched three cows at the gym

“did i miss anything?” he asks, sipping his shake and eyeing you with those boba lookalike peepers like he’s the main character

why are his eyes so

cute

“yeah, we solved climate change and made contact with aliens. you're late.”

he smirks. smirks. “nice. guess i’ll tackle world hunger next.”

one of your lab mates looks up from her phone just to whisper, “he’s so hot..”

my ass.

“he’s useless”

you’re about to drop-kick the clipboard out of his hands when he lazily stretches and says, “so what’s the plan, y/n? you always have the best ideas”

and just like that, everyone turns to you like a pack of hyenas waiting for their next meal

you might actually murder him. right after you finish this stupid project.

>:-)

midnight.

you’re staring at your notes like they’re written in ancient alien hieroglyphics. focus? yup, that’s a myth

through the wall, you hear it. again.

jungkook’s obnoxious gym playlist thumping loud enough to summon the gods of protein.

how about you just summon the reaper to maybe reap your soul or his

you try to ignore it. you really do. but then the bass drops, and you swear the walls start vibrating

ARGH

that’s it. you’ve snapped. you slam your pen down and march out of your apartment like a woman on a mission

by the time you’re at his door, you’re already regretting this decision

but sleep-deprived y/n? she’s not known for her impulse control

you bang on the door like your life depends on it

>:-(

after a moment, jungkook opens up, looking like he just stepped out of a gym rat rom-com. damp hair, earbuds in, wearing a tank top that shows off way too much arm.

good lord, those tattoos..

“what’s up?” he asks casually, pulling out an earbud, as if you didn’t just nearly break his door down

whats up? what thE hELL DOES HE MEAN WHATS UP??

“it’s midnight!” you yell, waving a hand in the general direction of your apartment. “some of us need sleep to survive!”

he blinks at you, tilting his head like a confused golden retriever. “but you’re awake now. want to do a quick set of push-ups?

you stare at him. you need to go to the store from where he bought the audacity. “push-ups?!”

“yeah,” he says, dead serious. “it’s a good way to burn off frustration. i do them all the time when i’m annoyed.”

“maybe i should start,” you mutter, narrowing your eyes. “because i’m annoyed right now.”

jungkook grins like the demon he is. “great! i’ll grab my mat.”

before you can stop him, he’s already turned back into his apartment. you briefly consider running, but it’s too late.

this is your life now.

five minutes later, you’re on the floor of his apartment, struggling to do one (1) push-up while he effortlessly does twenty in the same time it takes you to collapse in defeat

you feel like someone has bathed you in sweat

“this is humiliating,” you groan, face smushed into the mat

maybe you should’ve just slept

“nah, you’re doing great,” he says, way too cheerfully for someone torturing you. “just three more and you’ll hit... like, five total.”

you debate throwing a dumbbell at him but decide against it

jail isn’t worth it.

yet.

five minutes later you’re on the floor of his apartment, now two (2) push-ups deep and already regretting every decision you’ve made up to this point

you try again, your arms shaking with the effort, your brain screaming for mercy, when—

crack

“ow, ow, ow!” you yelp as your shoulder protests in a way that’s probably not supposed to happen

“that’s it, i’m dOne” you wince, face red from the sheer humiliation and pain

jungkook is standing there with a weirdly sympathetic expression that’s 90% amusement and 10% concern

he’s crouching beside you now, and you can't help but notice his Bambi eyes, all big and concerned, looking at your shoulder like he's actually worried for you

fml

this is so unfair

“u good?” he asks, voice unusually soft, and you can’t help but notice that barely there scar on his left cheek pulling slightly as he frowns and looks down at you

you glare at him, wincing a little more than you’d like to admit

does it look like ur good lol

“i think i pulled something” you mutter, still holding your shoulder, and mentally kicking yourself for agreeing to do this in the first place

you knew you shouldn’t have agreed to him

“mm,” he hums thoughtfully, his gaze flicking to your face, and then down to your shoulder with that gentle focus you didn’t think he was capable of

oUuu

“you should’ve asked for help, rookie” he says with that familiar cocky grin, but you catch the slight crinkle of concern in his brow, the mole beneath his lips almost beckoning you to stare at it

why is he so dumb but also so stupidly handsome?

and then his fingers are brushing against your shoulder again, carefully massaging the area in a way that’s too intimate for someone who’s just your annoying gym-obsessed neighbor

your heart rate spikes, and suddenly the injury doesn't seem like such a big deal anymore

“i’m fine, really,” you lie, trying to brush it off, but the way his Bambi eyes are looking at you—all soft and worried—has your head spinning

oh god

“i don’t think you are” he mutters, voice low, as he places a hand gently on your waist, pulling you just a little closer

god, stop being so touchy

the fact that he smells like musk and with some citrus-y notes underneath doesn’t help either

you feel your cheeks warming and lips parting

you feel yourself leaning in despite all logic telling you to stop, and then his eyes flicker down to your lips and back to your eyes, slow and cautious, like he’s waiting for your permission

you really cannot help but feel your heart skip a beat at how beautiful he looks. no like for real, his hair is slightly overgrown, curled at the ends which fall gracefully over his face

and how soft his lips look

your brain is too far gone, and the next thing you know, you’re kissing him, hand tangled in his hair, pulling him even closer

his hair feels so silky soft

but his lips are even softer, but there’s a desperate edge to the kiss, and you don’t know if it's because of your injury or the fact that you’ve both been playing this weird tension game for far too long

you feel like u can finally die kissing him like this

his hand slides down your back, pressing you into him as if you might disappear, and you pull away, gasping for air

jungkook’s eyes are wide, his pupils blown and heavy-lidded, his chest rising and falling quickly as he looks at you with an unreadable expression

“shit, i… i didn’t think i was actually going to do that” he murmurs, his voice rough and nearly trembling if u hear closely

you stare at his lips again, the mole under them, the way he looks so dumb but also so dumb handsome

his mouth parts to say something stupid again but you shush him with your pointer on his lips

“shut up and kiss me again, you idiot” you mutter, pulling him back in without a second thought

oH WOW

Jungkook doesn’t need any more encouragement. this time, it’s all teeth and heat, a kiss that feels like it might burn the air around you both

and your shoulder? completely forgotten, left in the dust

the kiss doesn’t end in some grand, romantic crescendo like the movies promised

you both were shamelessly making out on his mat

you were perched on his lap and both of u were busy eating eachother’s mouths (it sounds gross but that’s what exactly u two were doing) when suddenly you give his hair a tug

and you hear a moan spilling from him

his hips buck up and you gasp, but it ends with him abruptly pulling away

he’s breathing like he just ran an hour on the treadmill. cheeks all flushed, lips shining with saliva and eyes wide

and your heart is hammering in your chest like it’s trying to escape

jungkook stares at you, lips slightly swollen, eyes wide and wild, and for once, the idiot looks just as lost as you feel

“i—uh—” you stammer, the words tangling in your throat because what the hell are you supposed to say after something like that

“y- yeah,” he cuts in, his voice rough and strained like he’s been punched in the gut, “same”

same? SAME?!

you glare at him, more out of panic than anger, because suddenly the room feels too small, and his scent—something annoyingly musky and Jungkook-ish—is now overwhelming you

“i, uh, should go” you blurt out, scrambling to your feet and clutching your sore shoulder like a lifeline

jungkook doesn’t stop you, just sits there on the floor, looking up at you with a furrowed brow and an expression you can’t quite place

“cool” he mutters, dragging a hand through his messy hair as his jaw clenches

you don’t say anything else, don’t even look back as you practically bolt out of his apartment and into the safety of your own, slamming the door shut behind you

breathe, you tell yourself, leaning against the door, your heart still racing, your lips still tingling from his kiss

you won’t lie, you really didn’t think it would take just a tug of hair to have Mr. Muscle moaning under you

and that kind of inflated ur ego too

>:-)

but now

as u stand behind your closed door

the warmth that had filled your chest moments ago is quickly replaced by a knot of confusion and panic

because this wasn’t supposed to happen, not with Jungkook of all people

he’s my annoying gym-rat neighbor. this is… this is stupid

or is this really?..

no matter how much you try to convince yourself, your fingers keep brushing your lips absentmindedly, and your brain replays the moment over and over again like some kind of cruel joke

the next morning, you half expect him to blast his gym playlist at full volume to piss you off like he always does

but it’s quiet

too quiet

jungkook doesn’t blast music. doesn’t clank weights around. doesn’t do anything to make his presence known, and it’s driving you insane

you don’t know why it bothers you so much, but it does

when you leave for class, you catch a glimpse of him locking his door, but he doesn’t even glance your way

just slings his backpack over his shoulder and walks off like you don’t exist

asshole

yea that hurt. a Lot. like a good amount, because you are sure that you felt that pain in the centre of your chest

but it’s not like you’re any better

you bury yourself in your textbooks, pretending the kiss never happened, even though your stupid brain refuses to let it go

your chest feels tight every time you hear his door open or his voice filter through the thin walls

and you hate how you feel disappointed every time he doesn’t acknowledge you

like you really are a stranger to him

:-(

it’s pathetic, but you can’t help it

the silence between the two of you stretches on like an invisible barrier

days pass, and the two of you become masters of the fine art of avoidance

there’s a strange art to it, like walking on eggshells in your own apartment

even if u two live in separate apartments, it just feels

weird

you are so used to him being so noisy and what not

but the silence is heavy, uncomfortable, like an unfinished sentence hanging in the air

and it’s clEar neither of you know how to handle whatever the hell this is

you can’t figure out whether it’s a relief or suffocating

and every time you pass him in the hallway or see him through your apartment window, it’s like a silent conversation you’re not having

and that, somehow, feels worse than everything else

you want him to say something. anything.

but he doesn’t

and neither do you

and it makes you sick how easy it is to fall back into the rhythm of pretending he doesn’t exist

even when he’s right there.

you go to class and he’s there

sitting three rows ahead of you like he’s deliberately trying to ignore you

and with that girl who cannot seem to have her hands off his bicep

and you’re… fine with it

totally fine

you are just hoping that your glare is enough to burn a hole in her skull

it’s just that you can’t stop staring at the back of his head

like maybe he’ll turn around and say something but nope

the entire lecture passes and he doesn’t even glance over

and you try not to overthink it but you’re pretty sure jungkook is doing the same thing to you

ignoring you

on purpose

you’re not imagining it, right?

lunch rolls around and you sit down at your usual spot

jungkook’s sitting at the table next to you with his back to you

he doesn’t even look up when you sit down

normally, he would’ve sent you a little half-smile or asked about your day or whatever. .

but now? nothing

it’s like you’re invisible

and that’s fine. you don’t care.

but deep down, you feel this weird lump in your chest

because you didn’t expect this coldness from him

even after everything that’s happened

and you’d even unconsciously brought his favourite flavour of chips he especially likes..

:(

then you see him texting on his phone

and you can’t help but peek over at his screen

jungkook is texting someone

and it’s not you

for some reason, that stings more than it should, but you swallow it down and pretend you didn’t notice

the silence between the two of you stretches out for days

it’s like the entire universe is pretending you never had that moment together

the night when everything took a wild ass turn

but jungkook’s acting like it never happened

and so are you.

and maybe, just maybe, that’s better

maybe he regrets kissing you.

maybe you even made him uncomfortable?..

and maybe this is easier

you can’t decide if it hurts or if you’re just overthinking it

either way, you stop checking his texts, stop wondering what he’s doing in his apartment

you try your best to pretend it’s okay

but deep down, you miss the stupid moments

the ones where he wasn’t so distant where it feels like something ended between you two before it could even start.

it feels like it’s been over a decade

:(

and you hate it.

but you push it aside

it’s just… the silence is way too loud now.

you’re sitting in your room, trying to convince yourself that letting go of jungkook is the right thing to do

and perhaps ur failing miserably lol

but it’s hard because every five minutes you catch yourself staring at something that reminds you of him

your notes? he doodled on them during lectures

your hoodie? yeah, it’s his. he lent it to you one day and never asked for it back

your heart? yeah. he kind of stole that too

you’re spiraling between sleep and insanity when there’s a knock on your door

no, wait—it’s not a knock

it’s banging — like someone’s fist is about to break through the wood

WHO CALLED THE COPS ON YOU ONG

you jump up, your heart pounding, and open the door

and there he is

jungkook—standing there, looking like he just ran a marathon and fought a bear at the same time

hair all messy, slight bags underneath his eyes and kinda disheveled outfit

for a split second, you freeze, your breath catching in your throat

oh

it’s been weeks since you’ve seen him, and suddenly having him standing in front of you is making your heart race like crazy

“i can’t—” he stops, breathless, hands on his knees like he’s about to collapse

you’re standing there, eyes wide, totally taken aback by the sight of him, feeling a mix of relief and something else you can’t quite place

yet

“i can’t take it anymore,” he says, looking up at you with that ridiculous face of his

you grab that meaty bicep of him, ushering him to stand up

“what are you talking about?” you ask, completely confused

“you. i’m talking about you,” he says, taking a step closer

hUH

the air around you feels like it’s being sucked out of the room

your head is spinning because after all this time, here he is, right in front of you

“i like you. i’ve always liked you. and i didn’t know how to tell you, so i…”

“i got all this gym equipment just to bother you. i’d turn the music up way too loud, and i thought that’d make you notice me. i sat next to you at lunch, even in lectures, doing everything to annoy you because i didn’t know how else to approach you, i really thought—”

“jungkook.”

you blink, processing everything in a blur, your heart still hammering in your chest

but he doesn’t quite listen to you. “i knew you liked my sketches we had during cardio lectures, so i always made sure to draw—”

“juNGKOOK!”

you cut him off, smacking his idiotic shoulders “you’re an idiot.”

jungkook stops, eyes widening a little, but there’s this look of relief on his face

like a huge weight has just been lifted off him

almost like when u get to pee after holding it in for hours

“i know,” he says softly, and for the first time, you realize how vulnerable he looks standing there

he somehow looks

small.

“then why didn’t you just talk to me like a normal person?” you ask, your voice a mix of exasperation and amusement

jungkook smiles sheepishly, his pearly whites flashing. “i guess i thought this would be easier.”

easier.

only if he knew that each moment without him felt like the earth opening up and swallowing you

AND!!! HIS FAVOURITE ONION VINEGAR FLAVORED CHIPS!! which used to be your absolutely hated flavour but somehow you’ve caught a liking to them recently

how ironic

the room feels heavy with tension as you both stand there, unsure of what to say next, but his gaze is so intense, it makes your heart skip

“say something,” he says, his voice quieter now, almost pleading. “please.”

you can feel the heat rising in your cheeks, still flustered, but there’s something about his earnestness that makes everything else fade into the background

and the way his caramel brown eyes nearly sparkle underneath your dimly lit apartment lights

you shake your head with a smile.

“you’re an idiot.”

but you're smiling like a total fool because what else are you supposed to do when the guy you’ve been in love with just confessed to you?

jungkook’s face softens, and then he smiles too

a smile which looks so adorable you feel your heart will burst

and it’s over for you

“so, uh…” he scratches the back of his neck, looking bashful. “does that mean you like me too?”

you roll your eyes, your heart racing all over again, and grab the front of his shirt to pull him inside

“kiss me already”

the door slams shut behind you.

and the rest

as they say, is history

:-)