#but this little blog helped keep me sane

[atlantis-scribe]

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

[travelling-wanderer]

💜:Hey(I'm new in your blog)

I have a little request about Jax x Reader: What if Reader ignored Jax causing him to get kind of angry about it and Jax goes into Reader's room and finds Reader diary (Reader not being in the room).

(Do it if you want)(^w^).

・﹒・ jealousy, jealousy - request

Other Request by anon: **konck** **knock** **knock** Headcanon de Jax the amazing digital circus or jelouse....? Sorry i don't good with inglish :"<

Summary: You had hung out with Kinger quote often, he had become someone who you felt bad for and wanted to make sure he never felt alone. You wound up genuinely enjoying his company and had become good friends with. However- Jax didn't like that. He had found and taken your diary and had read from it just to show how much he wanted your attention.

Warnings: None

Pairing: Jax x GN!reader

Notes: Hello! I got 2 separate requests and combined them into one since it seemed fitting!

The Digital Circus had very few members, yet you always found someone to interact with here, whether it was Gangle or Kinger, but you never felt too lonely. However, you did keep a small diary to keep yourself sane, writing down thoughts and what happened during the "day" helped to keep you grounded here and from truly going insane. But it was private of course, you wanted absolutely nobody to read it under any circumstances. You always kept it in a chest right in front of your bed along with a few other items that you grew close to and wanted to keep.

You especially didn't want one person to read it- Jax. He was someone who would use that shit as blackmail against you and force you to do things you definitely would not prefer to do. Mainly considering you jotted down the possibility of forming a crush on him, it wasn't a sure thing, just a "maybe" thing. He often antagonized everyone and was a huge asshole, but there was just something so tantalizing about him, you couldn't help but want to learn more about him and spend time with him. 

So, naturally, you ignored him, in fear of actually crushing on him and making it obvious nonetheless. Nobody could blame you as he was the most deplorable out of everyone. You ignored his taunting, his smug smiles, his pranks, you ignored it all in favor of remaining neutral to his mischievous self. Jax didn't say anything about it, but Ragatha worried that you would eventually break from letting him get to you after a while. It was quick to reassure her that that would not happen, that you were stronger than he was. 

However, you were worried when he would eventually break from your lack of reactions to his behavior. Jax was most likely angry from it, but he wasn't acting any more aggressive than how he normally was. He was probably internalizing it until he couldn't one day and you were not looking forward to that day. But that was a later problem as right now, you were helping Kinger build an awesome fort for "protection", making it big enough for the both of you. He was supposedly here the longest, so since he held on this long without being abstracted, he was losing an even bigger grip on himself in this new reality. The chess piece became a good friend to you though, even if his memory and spatial awareness was completely shot.

"Ok let me add one more block here!" You placed a big, yellow block on one side that was open, smiling at how the fort was slowly coming together. Kinger often preferred small pillow forts just for him, but you both occasionally would build larger ones to fit you both.

"Oh that looks wonderful!" He sounded happy as he clapped his not-attached hands in glee, enjoying your presence and "creative mind" as he puts it. He slid over- doesn't have any legs so he just floats- and examined your current area, humming. He then looked over to you, suddenly screaming in fear and fell down on the colorful ground. It was sad, he did this so much because he forgets who he was just talking to and who was right next to him.

"Kinger its alright its just me" You smiled softly as you extended your hand, him grabbing it and you pulling up. You never dared to get mad at him, never allowing any mistreatment of him as his mind was similar to one with Dementia. Unfortunately, the one person here that often didn't enjoy being with anyone was Jax. The amount of times you scolded him for scaring Kinger and he didn't care at all. Went in one ear, out the other as they say. 

"Sorry…what were we doing? OH right, the fort!" Chuckling, you looked at the probable old man as he struggled with simply having as normal of a time here as possible. Besides that, everything was going well as you handed him some red blocks to make a chair when the familiar sights of a tall, lanky, purple, red overall wearing rabbit came through and stared at you.

"You, with me, now" Jax spoke and he was absolutely pissed off, his usual expression of a smile was replaced with a serious one. How dare he try to order you around? Stood with your hand on your hip, you raised your eyebrow as he stood there, expecting you to just go with him.

"No" You didn't have time for his shit, you were having such a fun time being with Kinger and he was not going to ruin that for you. Scoffing, he walked closer with arms crossed and stared you down as he was taller than you was. You weren't afraid of him, there were more things to be scared of here than a simple bully that got dealt the same fate as you.

"Yes, now, I mean it" At the same time, the chess piece came back and stared at the current interaction, eyes wide. His posture became curled up as if he was trying to make himself smaller, not enjoying that Jax was in his safe space.

"Am I uh…interrupting something?" He asked nervously, glancing back and forth. You were about to say no and to tell Jax to f off when he spoke first.

"Everything is fine, Ho-ha, now leave since Mx. "I'm staying" won't" One death glare caused Kinger to rush off in fear, causing you to get so angry. Stomping up to the rabbit, you said nothing for a few seconds as you sized him up, staring at him with a scowl.

"Why are you so fricking demanding all the sudden? And stop-" 

"Calling him Ho-ha. Yeah I don't care. Stop hanging out with him anyways" The rabbit plucked the teddy bear you placed on a pillow and started to boredly play with it. Ripping it from his hands, you gently placed Mr. Cuddles back on his rightful throne and pushed  Jax around towards the exit.

"Ah, now I wouldn't do that Mx." He said, just knowing he was smirking right now.

"And why not?" You stopped right before he would have been pushed through the door when he chuckled and out of nowhere, a very familiar book appeared in his hand. Your diary! Swiping at it, he unfortunately was too tall as he held it above your head, making you jump, curse your height!

"Give it back Jax! Seriously give it back now!" Jumping didn't help at all as he turned around and stared you down, holding it up at its highest point. Growling, you grabbed his arm and pushed it down, earning a "hey!" as you managed to snatch it back from him.

"That's mine thank you very much" You huffed and flipped through the pages, making sure everything was in working order when he said something you would not expect.

""Jax is a rather…interesting fellow. He is rather charming, but also a very rude person, I do not know how to feel about him, yet I want to be close to him"" A large smirk showed on his face with a knowing look, knowing he got you right where he wanted you to be. That bastard quoted from your diary!

"Say, you seem so utterly fascinated by me, why are you hanging out with Kinger instead of me?" He asked with an inflection that was hard to get a read on at first, however, it didn't take long for you to put the pieces together. He was completely jealous. But why? This was Jax you were talking about, who knew anything about him?

"Wait…are you…jealous, Jax?" Hook, line, and sinker. Sputtering, he faltered before a face of anger took place.

"I am absolutely NOT. Don't be delusional" He scoffed, deflecting the fact that he was indeed, very jealous as he crossed his arms and leaned to one side, looking away from you.

"Oh really? Then you wouldn't mind if I brought Kinger back in then! Oh Ki-" Jax covered your mouth, a blessing for him since if you didn't have one, he wouldn't have been able to stop your yelling for the chess piece. You ripped his arm away from you and walked out of the fort, no longer seeming fun to be in anymore, maybe you can build a new one after this asshole leaves.

"Ok I AM jealous. Are you happy now?" You were now outside of the fort, Kinger nowhere to be seen. Jax stood in front of you as he rolled his eyes, not happy with admitting that he was jealous. But why was he so jealous of you just hanging out with Kinger?

"No, because you somehow broke into my room and stole and read my private information!" Huffing, you hid your journal behind your back as you stared him down. 

"Why are you so jealous, Jax?" He was the one in control, now it was time for YOU to be in control now.  You spoke confidently as you walked closer to him, getting into his personal space. 

"Because-" He matched your confidence for a few seconds before pink dusted his cheeks, he went silent for a few seconds, trying to figure out what to say as his eyes drifted everywhere but you. His black eyes finally landed back on yours and he took a deep breath in, and then out.

‘It’s because…I like you ok! That’s…that’s the only reason!” He raised his voice but not to the point of yelling as he curled in on himself, crossing his arms and holding them tighter than usual, he was scared. Slowly walking up to him, you smiled softly as you laid your free hand on top of his.

“It’s ok Jax, I won’t tell anyone. Not unless you want everyone to know you’re a big softie?” You teased, causing the rabbit to grumble as you stood on your tip toes and kissed his cheek. He froze, not expecting it in the slightest as you pulled away. The temptation to be snarky even as a joke crossed your mind, but knew he had issues being vulnerable, so instead, you smiled as you called for Kinger to finish the fort as Jax stood there like a deer in headlights

[hrdenha]

— office hours | p.js

synopsis: you're stressed, still a virgin, and wanted to get laid. you wanted it to be a complete stranger. luckily, for you, there's one who's been watching you from the vip rooms.

pairings: stranger!park jongseong x office worker/virgin!reader

warnings: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. drunk reader, still with consent of course, basically asking some stranger to get her virginity, jay's big 👀, fingering, penetration, breeding kink, c*ck warming, oral s*x (f receiving)

AUTHOR'S NOTE — !

and i am backkk! it's been awhile since i posted here but tbh, i still have so many drafts in this blog. i dont know when i can finish it and post it but I'm hoping for the absolute best. please, turn a blind eye whenever you see errors and misspelled words. this is not yet edited and i just finished writing this a few minutes ago.

oh! and don't forget to check out some of my works and enjoy! also, let me know what u think in the comments or reblogs 🫶

"So, let me sum this up..." Ryujin held up her right hand for a 'pause' before drinking her Starbucks cup as if she needed the strong savor of coffee to stay sane on something that was about to go on.

"So you wanted to get laid but you're still a virgin and you don't know someone who can do you?"

Is it just you, or did ryujin just emphasize the words 'you', 'get laid', and 'virgin'? Is it that hard to believe? Is the idea THAT crazy?

"Yes, and please lower your voice" You hissed at her which Karina chuckled, all while trying to cover your face with your right hand; as you turned your head back when a group of employees walked past the three of you.

"How about, chan?" Karina suggested. "From the I.T. unit? He looks so good and IS good"

Both you and ryujin make a revolted face, "Ew. How do you know?" The woman beside you asked that karina just responded with a simple shrug before looking away to sip on her coffee.

You shook your head, "I don't want the person to know me and vice versa. I think I need a complete stranger to help me... with this" The word 'stranger' dragged in between your teeth when you groaned at your so-called 'problem'.

"Is that your new fetish?" Ryujin teasingly smiled at you, jutting her eyebrows up and down, making you roll your eyes.

"but seriously what? we can't just throw you to some man on the street, y/n. what if he's a good-for-nothing asshole?" ryujin replied with karina agreeing on her side. "But seriously, y/n what's the rush? I mean, I'm not the sentimental type of a person obviously..." The blue-haired woman rolled her eyes, "but would it even hurt if you wait a little bit more? for a person you know and are comfortable with?"

You exhaled, karina has a point though "I know but it's been bugging me. I don't like rushing things like this but it keeps me from experiencing 'that' level of fun. It feels like I'm missing something. I want to live my life a little, not that I'll sleep with everyone I laid my eyes but you know? Having fun without thinking of some limitation is such a temptation."

Both of your girls nodded, telling you that they understand. "Okay, let's go with plan B. After work this thursday, let's go to this bar I knew" This time, it's your turn to nod silently thanking your friends that they're supportive.

Your mind flies elsewhere as you try to convince yourself that your choice is fair, something that was not bad but also not good.

You're not lying when you told your friends that you don't like rushing things like this. Originally, you just wanted to go with the flow. If you'll get into a serious relationship, which is far away to happen because you're a career-oriented woman— then you'll give it to someone who deserves it. Of course, you had a fair share of relationships; a tough one on top of that.

Maybe it was the trauma. Having a relationship running for almost 2 years and then suddenly opening your eyes to see your boyfriend, heads up manipulating you was exhausting. That's why you didn't hesitate to break up with your boyfriend who tried to manipulate you into having sex with him while having a sexual relationship with his branch manager in a strictly no-office romance setting.

Of course, it didn't end with just the breakup. Of course, you wouldn't let him prey against other women again. No, it's not your type at all. You wanted to cripple him... big time. And so, you print all his soliciting of nudes amongst the women in their branch and the sexual conversation with his manager he's been having an affair with; even manage to ladle some CCTV footage where the two of them had sex in one of the office room then sent it anonymously to the head office of the company which resulted in his and the woman's contract to be terminated.

After that chaotic incident, you never opened up your heart to everyone. You just basically drowned yourself in work that resulted in you becoming the head manager of your own team.

At first, you're contented, happy even. You stepped up your game at work with nothing but your schedule as the first source of conflict in your life. The fact of you, being not in a relationship and a virgin on top of that, didn't really matter to you except last month when things started to happen.

The corporation you've been working at got a huge project that resulted in all the manpower to work causing you to be a little irritated. It's not the first time you handled such a huge project but if incompetent people will continuously be incompetent, then someone will definitely be on edge for days. You're convinced it was just the fatigue and stress. Of course, what else could it be? but then your cousin, Jake, told you otherwise.

"You're a little bit snappy these days, y/n" you smelled the oddly familiar aroma of Macchiato behind that even you can't help but to taste it on the tip of your tongue.

Jake emerges from behind you, mumbling a soft 'here' as he gently puts down the glass of the drink he personally made that he knew your favorite.

Your hands immediately glued to the cup taking a delicious sip before looking up to him, humming as the familiar taste of sweetness and vanilla hit your tongue, "It's nothing, just got a big project so we've been working nonstop"

"You need to relax"

"Believe me, I will..." You nodded your head, not looking at your cousin while your point finger keeps scrolling through the documents. "Just not now, maybe after this because work is currently kicking my ass off"

"Nah, bro. You don't need to wait for your work to finish in order to relax. You just need to get laid and then it will all go"

After Jake told you that, how can he walk out of your room as if nothing happened? Now, how can you function properly when you are mostly convinced that you really need to get laid in order to remove all the stress?

At first, you become in denial. You tried doing it the traditional way. Got yourself your favorite scented candle, play your favorite movie, a nice warm bath, and your friend, the pink vibrator after you bridged the project into a success that made the company give your whole team a two weeks vacation and an added bonus.

You become contented again. Turns out you don't need a man and sex just to relax, right? Wrong. Not until another project came up and you were on edge again, that's when you accepted your pain and resorted to your friends that put you in this situation.

Why can't God or someone high above drop a respectable, career-oriented man like you with a big dick and high stamina to fuck the stress out of you, straight on your lap? But no, that would be too good to be true.

Days easily passed by and here you are now, at Karina's house while she attempts to doll you up. You're used to wearing make-up, also because of your job where it is needed to look presentable at all times. What you're not accustomed to is wearing makeup with the purpose of getting laid.

"Drink this" Karina hand you a glass of water? Your hands took it unconsciously but give her a confused look where she just mouthed 'vodka'. That's when you realize all three of you have your own 'vodka' in your hands.

"... for what?" you ask carefully still confused as to why they drink vodka when there's a lot or you mean a LOT of alcoholic drinks at the bar later. You saw the two women behind you look at each other in the mirror before laughing. "Aww, this poor thing" Karina coos, "Luckily, she have us" Ryujin pouted before walking on your supposed-to-be outfit that was still in the box that she had delivered this morning.

"You need that so you'll be tipsy even before we get to the club" Karina replied when she saw your still confused face. She holds a makeup brush in front of you before whispering, "Don't worry, little tiger. We'll sharpen your claw and make you run free" You close your eyes tightly at the thought while feeling the brush on your lips. Dang, are you really that old potato?

"Try to be bold, y/n... remember that" Karina whispered as she brush another dab of the 'boldest' color of eyeshadow on your lids just like she said. "You're confident and bold, and we love that but it's not for the right thing as of now. This is not the job, not for hunting clients or something. Your purpose is to get laid, to have some dick in your mouth, okay?" ryujin added that made you playfully hit her.

"And... done!" Karina squealed, softly tucking an unwanted hair off your forehead. "Damn, you're so hot!" The girl made a 'cat claw' with her hands teasing as you stand in front of the full-body mirror across her room.

You were wearing a red mini dress that has a perfect cut-out on your solar plexus, partnered with a stylish necklace and simple earrings. The color made your hair and sultry makeup stand out.

Yes, you look good and you'll give karina and ryujin a thumbs up for helping you with the right make-up and dress but also, you can't help but cry inside when the skirt would slide up when you walk making your hands automatically pull it down again.

Ryujin slaps your hands, "No! No touching the dress, I'm not gonna let you slouch all day just because you wanted it to be below the knee length"

"It keeps riding up!" You pouted, "It's helping you get a dick tonight by practically displaying your ass" Ryujin replied before clicking her tongue, "Just let it slide the hell it wants, you look fine. Dang, you look so good, girl!" She added before pulling the three of you outside with the taxi waiting.

The bar was loud and dark. It has a bright light flashing in every direction and was packed with people. As the three of you walk towards the tunnel, the loud music slowly become prominent, the same with people greeting the girl you're with. "Karina!" Some guy called that she just responded with a kiss, "Who's this?" He asks looking at your figure up and down. "I didn't know we have a new meat coming up"

"You'll taste it if it wants to be eaten later so watch out but for now, we're here for a girl's night out and no boys are allowed" Karina responded for you, slightly pushing the guy out of the way and pulling both you and ryujin inside. Karina's action made you sigh in relief, you were getting uncomfortable at the guy's stare. It felt like he was stripping you naked. Will you be able to pull this off?

"How are we supposed to talk?" You talk loudly at ryujin's ears which made her laugh. "Just relax and have fun, y/n. Let it all out, just relax" She said patting your back before giving you a drink that karina ordered before.

"Have this... hope this helps you calm down" And she's right, you indeed got calm as the sweet taste of the cocktail hit your tongue. A little while and you were downing drinks after drinks. You even pulled your friends into the dance floor yourself, you were indeed having fun. In fact, too much fun.

It was just a cocktail, but you down a sweet cocktail into a shot of tequila real quick. And no, you're not drunk and you know it. You still know what you're doing, still, know what you're saying, and can still process what is happening around you. It's just that you were far more relaxed than the first time you walked through the entrance of this bar.

As you dance with your friends on the dancefloor, your eyes thoughtlessly linger on the second floor where the VIP rooms are located. And there you saw a man in a full expensive suit that perfectly fit and hug his body— standing on the veranda just in front of the stage where the dancefloor was located. He has a drink in his left hand while the other was tucked away in his pocket. You don't know if you're seeing this clearly but you swore, you saw him looking down directly at you. The man was sipping on his cup, hooded eyes still looking at you, watching you like a hawk observing its prey.

You want to blame it on alcohol, you were getting brazen and you like it. If it's true that the mysterious man WAS really looking at you then you have to give him a show, right?

And so you started to dance more sensually, feeling yourself like there's no tomorrow, even biting your lips. It was a bonus that an equally sexy song played at the right time. That made your hips unconsciously grind, making your friends hype you up even more. The time you look up again, the man was gone. Not a single person was standing on the second floor. The man suddenly vanishing in your eyes made you feel disappointed but didn't let it ruin your fun. Now, that's your main agenda, aside from hunting for a dick, of course.

When the song finished, you excused yourself from the dance floor to fetch yourself a drink. Well, that goes your social battery. It finally hit zero and right now, you need ice-cold water to help with your burning body. You walked towards the counter and requested your drink. Enough with the dance, now, all you want to do is drink in peace.

Which men never really understand. The whole time you were there, a handful of guys try giving you their company but you politely turn them down, not giving them a chance to see through you even though you can feel the liquor slowly hitting your senses. Your eyes unconsciously traveled towards the second floor where the reticent man was standing before. The rooms look expensive plus there are bouncers standing at the entrance of the stairwell.

If that man was real, then he was surely loaded. Lucky.

Your mind woke up when there was a shout coming from the other side of the bar. A fight just broke out and they were causing a scene. You don't know why but your head turns again towards the stairs going upstairs to the VIP rooms. The bouncers who were standing there before were now gone, maybe to assist with the fight.

Your lips slowly curved upward, feet straightly walking towards the stair and onto the second floor. There's a series of rooms and you took your time looking inside each of them. Finally, you reached the room at the far corner of the hallway. You were about to pull the lever handle when you noticed it was not closed, the door was just slightly agape and music was coming inside.

You slowly push it open and see a man in a suit sitting on the couch with papers on his hands. There are a few bottles of liquor on the table. Wine, Champagne, beer; you name it and it'll be there.

The man quietly looks at you, still waiting for your next move. You didn't know if this is the same man you saw earlier. But one thing is for sure, he is handsome: aura never failed to make your skin shiver.

As a career woman, him sitting expensively on the couch with a folder in his hands, while wearing black specs and a watch was so hot to see. It made your mouth water. It was as if the man was a blessing from the heavens and you really like him.

Your mouth can't help but release a giggle at the thought before finally letting yourself in and closing the door with your weight, your fingers turning their locks.

Maybe it was the alcohol, the liquor in your system was making you bold... making you brave as if you were in an illusion. You were in a perception that you mostly can do anything at this point.

You started walking in his direction, the man raise his brow, throwing the paper at the table not really caring if it got wet before shifting his position. His arms were now resting at the top of the couch as he manspread. Damn, he's so sexy.

His exorbitant suit really matched this place. The warm light that elucidates some parts of the room made his skin glow. He was so perfect, his eyes are soft but his thick eyebrows make them narrow and his hair... his perfect black hair slicked back completed his look.

He's a 10, a heaven on the place called Earth. You wanted him that's why you finally did the sole purpose of why you're here.

You approach his face and the manly fragrance immediately hit your senses, he smells good almost like a sophisticated noble. "You... I really like you" Your fingers seductively played with his tie before tugging it harshly closer to you, "Can you take my virginity... please?" Your voice drawled, staring intently into his eyes so that you can even see them mirror your lines.

It didn't go unnoticed on your sight the way his adam's apple bobbed, it made you release a snarky smile. "I believe you're drunk, miss" He coughed trying to compose himself and he didn't fail. The vulnerability you saw earlier fade almost immediately at the same time you noticed it.

"Too bad... I can clearly see you being turned on" You pouted, eyes gesturing at the forming tent on his pants; his eyes trailing behind.

"And, are you sure I'm drunk?"

"Well, are you?" He asks, the low tone of his voice making your skin shiver. You shake your head, smirking at him before grabbing a half-empty bottle of champagne and taking a drink of it. Oblivious, at the pair of eyes who are watching you with so much amusement.

"So..." You crawled on top, straddling him. Your lips can't help but smirk when you feel him jutting out his legs more for you. "Will you do me?"

"Don't need to tell me twice, kitten" His lips crashed with yours. Both lips molded perfectly with each other, and his teeth tugged at your lower rim demanding an entrance. The sudden stipulation made you smile in between your kiss and the way he deepens it made you think that he can't get enough of you.

The man pulled off from the kiss, heavy eyes setting on you while his hands feel your legs. "Come with me" He whispered leaving a butterfly kiss on one of your shoulders.

He gently pushes you off his lap before pulling you outside. There's another door aside from the one you use to get in, the said door was connected to a hallway where a modern elevator was waiting at the end of it. The two of you get inside and the man didn't waste the chance to once again entangled your bodies. He traps you on one of the corners, closing the space between the two of you with his body.

His lips immediately found yours, groaning when your lips caught him openly. Your arms can't help but unconsciously snake to his neck from the spur of the moment. He grabs your right leg, attaching it to his hips grinding himself on your clothed pussy

'Ding!' The elevator opened at its designated floor. The man pulled you again until both of you stops in front of a room. He snake his hands on his pocket, you noticed something black like a card. It must be a key card since he swipe it before the door automatically opens.

He pulled you in again before closing the door with your weight, kissing you hard again as if it was the first time he ever tastes you. The man scopes you up, both of your legs on either side of his body as both of you kiss like there's no tomorrow.

He put you on the bed, his hands tugging on his tie before pulling it off while his eyes set on you the whole time. You felt your pussy throb. How can someone be so hot just from pulling their tie off?

"Are you really sure about this?"

You didn't answer but nodded instead, the man shook his head. "I need your words, baby" His hands felt your cheeks, tucking your hair on your right ear. You hummed while closing your eyes to feel his tender touch, "I want you to take me" You finally said looking straight into his eyes.

"Just kiss me." And he did. He kisses you just how you like it, just how he likes it. It was as if he wants to devour you whole and you love it.

The man attacks your neck pulling you closer to him while leaving open mouth kisses on the way to your clothed chest. He was an expert, he made you lose your mind with his touch that you didn't even feel his fingers untying the strings from the back to loosen your shoulder strap.

He released a shaky breath at the sight of your bare breast. You felt his hot breath on your nipples and they almost immediately got hardened making him chuckle. His hands started massaging your front, followed by his mouth where his tongue played with your nipple, teeth bitting with your tits that made you lose your mind.

You felt his hands slowly traveling southward until he felt the wet spot on your panties caused by him. He didn't waste time and set the string of your thong aside then plunged a finger inside you that made you moan.

"Didn't even need to lubricate you on how wet you are, princess. So wet just because of me" He said, mouth and finger going back from to torturing both your tits and hole.

Your moan gets louder when he adds another finger and then another. "Fuck... ah!"

"Jay..." He suddenly said still pleasuring you.

"W-hat?"

"Moan my name" You don't know how your brain processed it but you nod. So his name was Jay? This a distinctive way of exchanging names but you love it

Jay eyes all your reaction as he torments you in pleasure. His hands didn't just go in and out but also up and down, even circling his fingers as if he was tickling the deepest part of you.

It didn't take long before the pleasure spreads across your body, the feeling of pleasure from his mouth and fingers mixing into a big pressure inside your stomach. You were practically screaming his new-learned name from pleasure and he was letting you. Even felt him smiling from your skin as you emphatically close your eyes.

"I- ah! gonna... cum! Jay!" You shouted feeling his pace becoming faster than before, making your back arches and head was thrown back at the bed. With one last cry of his name, you finally cum. Jay's fingers ride your high while you motionlessly lay on your back, mind still blown from the orgasm.

Jay lay beside you, his clothed erection brushing on your legs as he did. "You alright?"

You sighed before nodding just looking at the white ceiling, "That was... wow" a chuckle came out of your lips before looking at him. Jay was resting his head on his hands as he lay on his side while looking down at you, "One thing is for sure..." His brow rose, wordlessly telling you to continue. "I'm definitely not drunk"

Both of you chuckled, and you can't help but to stare at him. He really is beautiful. Your eyes gaze on his pants, "Aren't we going to take care of that?" You ask as you felt Jay eyes his erection.

"I don't know, will you?"

Is he challenging you? He didn't even know how you love challenges. You smirked pushing him to lay on his back that made jay smile in amusement, "Definitely" You took the chance to straddle him again, your bare chest giggling at the sudden movement.

Jay's dick was exactly underneath your pussy making you sigh in relief. The adonis sit up crashing his lips to you while you take off his suit then unbutton his polo and finally his well-toned body is displayed in front of you. "Like what you see?" He asks, brow raising at you.

You scoffed playfully, "And what if I do?"

And, that's the last thing you remembered before passing out and finally waking up in bed in the same room you and the man named 'jay' practically devoured each other out. You don't remember anything after you blacked out, and you're not certainly sure if you really took care of Jay's err— problem but one thing you are sure of is that you didn't get laid, well, in terms with penetration, that is.

You enjoyed the night, that's for sure. So, you waited for Jay. You waited for the man who made you see stars the night before but no one came. You also tried finding some notes or any message he might have left but nothing. Jay must've got turned off after you passed out on him last night. Oh well, life goes on. You can't really do something about it even though you're dying to see him again to try to make it up for how he made you feel. But then again, you have a reputation to maintain and so, you prepare yourself to go to work.

"Is it true that Chairman Park's grandson is finally here after years of managing our western branch?"

"Maybe? I'm just hoping he's hot— ah, good morning, sunbae!" it didn't go unnoticed to your ears on how the woman's voice raised a little higher before both of them bowed to you as a respect when you step inside the elevator. You're not a strict superior and have your own issue to resolve so you just dismissed them after returning a simple smile and a bow.

"Oh, so you're alive. We thought you were dead and got your organs sold over the black market." That's the first thing your co-worker, karina asked as soon as you pulled the glass door to step inside. You stared at her dumbfounded, mouth slight agape. "Not gonna let me sit first are you?"

The woman stared and is hot on your heels as you make your way on your own table to put your things down. You're not looking at Karina but you can feel how she rolled her eyes when you purposely do your own thing a little bit slowly to make your friend suffer a little bit. You know how she hates slow people.

You heard her huff a quiet laugh, still waiting for you as she rest both her arms on the lining that made your table's wall separator.

After making yourself comfortable sitting on your swivel chair, you finally look up to Karina; a teasing smile on your lips when you saw your friend's ticking patience.

She exhaled air, "So, what happened? We got so worried when we didn't saw you last night, even you're phone is off-" You quietly showed her your dead phone in which she just nodded. "Ryujin even thought someone kidnapped you" Well... that's not completely wrong, isn't it?

"I'm still alive and kicking as you can see, rin. And, I'm sorry about my lines not being open. I know you two are worried. Don't worry, this will never happen again."

"Fine... so what happened? Did you finally lost your virginity?"

"No"

"What?"

And so you tell the things that happened this morning, leaving all the details about the stunt you and jay pulled last night.

"So, you met this guy who brought you to a hotel room upstairs, blacked out and then that's it? Are you sure he didn't do something to you?" Karina asked, worried glazed over her voice.

You nodded before answering 'yeah', "I still have my clothes on and I don't feel anything wrong with my body."

"Well, that's good. I'm relieved nothing bad happened to you." She sighed, "So, what's the plan?"

You were about to say something when Ryujin ran inside hugging you, "Y/n! What happened? Are you alright?" Her hug was suffocating. This made you tap her, "Tigh—t!" She immediately pulled away whispering a soft 'sorry'.

"I'm alright, no need to worry, ryu."

"Okay, but that's not the only reason why I ran here. I heard that..." The girl signals for her hands to make you and karina scoot closer. "I heard that the chairman's son was here today and that he'll manage the company from now on." Ryujin whispered making Karina nod.

"Nothing new? I just heard about that in the elevator on my way here"

"That's cheating—"

"Everyone to the assembly hall, now!" One of the seniors announced after knocking on the glass, not even bothering to make his whole body go inside the door.

"What is it now?" Karina whispered but started walking towards the elevator otherwise. "Maybe we'll know whether the gossip about chairman park's son is true or not." You shrugged.

You, together with the other employees arrived at the hall not long after to finally take your respective seats. It was full and all the other high end members of the board were there too. "Something's big is coming" Ryujin whispered on your side that made you nod as you waited for the program to start.

"President Park Jongseong will now start his inauguration speech" Said the speaker as the crowd erupted in applauses as two young men entered the venue from the side before walking towards the stage. "President? Woah. He's our new boss." Karina whispered but you didn't care. Your eyes pinned on the man who was now in front of the center podium.

That's...

"Thank you for your warm welcome—" You can't hear what he's saying but you didn't remove your gaze at him. He's jay, right? The one who— wait. Is he looking over here?

You immediately lowkey covered your face and looked down when you realized he did. You're hoping he didn't see you at all. Hell, you're a few meters away from the stage. You're even sitting at the very end row of the chairs. There's no way he saw you.

Shit. You cursed realizing the weight of your actions. You just made your new boss finger you last night. The worst of it is that you even blacked out in front of him. You're fucked, Sim Y/n. You are fucked!

The speech address finished in line without fail or disturbance. Jay didn't even look over your way again much to your relief. After the speech was finished, the new president thanked the board members and immediately left saying he still had things to prepare for and that's the last thing you see 'Jay' today. It was as if nothing happened between the two of you and that he forgot about your existence.

After the event, things got back to normal. Aside from him being the sole topic of your office mate's conversation, nothing new reminds you about the man who does you good that turns out to be your new boss. That's why you're convinced that things finally ended. Well, that's what you thought.

"Y/n, are you sure you don't need us to wait for you?" Ryujin asked standing behind your chair, karina on the side. "No, really. I'm fine. Another slide and I'll finish this presentation then I'll go home. Don't let me take your time to relax." You replied smiling at them. They were convinced and so they finally left you.

It's early in the evening and you bet you're the last person on the floor. Not that you despised it. The presentation was due next week but you have the energy to finish it and so you did. You just wanted to spare yourself another workload next week.

After printing the last page, you decided to call it a day. You were about to ride the elevator when someone called you from behind. You look over your shoulder before turning around and finally met by an unknown guy explaining the unfamiliar voice that called you just now.

"Yes? Can I help you?" You politely asked, "One of the board members asked for you."

Board member? Me? That's weird. You thought you were the only person left.

"I understand, Mister...?"

"Kim. Kim Sunoo." He answered, smiling before starting to walk to show you the way.

"Sorry, I just don't recall seeing you around here." You explained looking at the back of his head. You heard Sunoo chuckled, "Well, we're new here, Ms. Sim."

We? But your confusion was resolved when you heard someone knocking but saw it was Sunoo. "Park sajang, miss sim is here."

Wait, park sajang? Your eyes got wide before looking at sunoo who just signal for you to come inside. Now, that you took a good look at him, you realize that sunoo's the same man you saw earlier at the assembly hall. The one who stands behind Jay, the chief secretary of this company.

"Miss Sim..." You woke up in daze when you heard his voice again. You didn't even realize that sunoo finally opened the door for you. And after contemplating things, you finally took a step inside.

The room was quite dark but well lit with the warm lights shining on the side. The wide glass window overseeing the city lights while a man, you knew was Jay, had his back turned to you while sitting on his table.

No one talked. The silence was suffocating at least, for you. Time finally came where you can't take it anymore and finally braved yourself to say something.

"You called for me, President Park?" You asked trying your best not to sound nervous.

The man stopped on whatever he was doing before finally facing you still sitting on his table with a folder on his hand.

"Sunoo" He called.

"Yes, Mr. Park?" Sunoo immediately answered from the other side of the door. I thought he left.

"I can take it from here, you can leave." You heard a 'yes, sir' before hearing the sound of steps finally fading.

"How are you feeling, Ms. Sim?"

You didn't look at him straight, just keeping your eyes on the floor. You heard him chuckled in low tone. That's sexy. "Now, where is that feisty woman i met last night, hmm kitten?"

"What?" You heard him right. You knew what he meant but your mind is currently blanked.

What's going to happen to you now? Will you get fired? Will you be homeless?

"Ms. Sim..." He called again making you look at him. He started walking towards you. You wanted to run or hide, whatever it is but you felt your body froze. Jay is now a few steps away from you. No suit in sight, just his white simple polo partnered with black slacks, two buttons unbuttoned causing his tan chest showing a little bit to tease. His sleeves were neatly folded up to his elbow wearing simple black bracelet while a glass adorned his eyes surely to read the files earlier. He looks so neat, elegant and... fucking sexy that you can't help but think how he'll look if you he decided to defile—

NO! What the heck are you thinking, Y/n?!

"I'm asking how you feel about last night..." Jay suddenly pulled you closer by your waist making you gasped, your hands automatically touching his shoulder and back for support. "How will you feel about picking up what you started last night?" Jay whispered in your ears and you swear you shivered, goosebumbs spreading on your skin. The only thing running on your mind is how you love to kiss him.

Oh fuck it! You thought before clashing your lips with him.

Jay greeted you with the same desire, playing with your tongue as both of you moan in pleasure.

"This is the office, Mr. Park." You whispered in between kisses. "I know," He replied leaving marks on your neck, "I just can't help it knowing I might lose you again."

"You won't. I promise."

Jay then looked straight in your eyes before kissing your forehead. "Let's get out of here."

Things happened so fast that you didn't even realize how the two of you got down towards the parking lot and into Jay's car. He immediately started the engine before driving away. Jay drove over the hills away from the traffic that explains why the drive felt like a blink of an eye.

You just saw yourself looking at Jay as he parked inside a huge house with an automatic gate that opened itself when his car stopped in front of it.

"Wait here" Your brain didn't have enough time to register his words when Jay jogged towards your side of door, opened it and started picking you up like a newly wedded bride.

"What—! Sir, I can walk."

"Sorry, can't help it" He whispered even though it's evident in his voice that he's not really sorry for the stunt. "And, that's Jay to you. We're not in the office anymore, Y/N."

How did he know your name? Oh, he's your new boss. It's not surprising if he did know basic information about you who's one of his employee. And with that, you simply nodded as Jay ascended the stairs and into a room. He gently puts you to bed as he connects his lips with yours. "Can't run now, kitten."

"I don't have the plan anyway" You replied, removing his polo, yours being the next one to join the pile of clothing on the floor. Jay started kissing your neck on the way to your chest where his skilled hands remove your brassiere in one swift move. He then continued his ventures southward kissing your stomach before removing your office skirt together with your lacey panties completely.

He spread your legs making you shiver in pleasure. Just the thoughts of the things he'll do to you is making you turned on, what more if he finally does it.

"Relax, kitten." He said before diving through your folds earning a moan from you. "J-jay! Ugh!" Fuck, he's eating you so good that your hands can't help but tugged his hair. Your moans got louder when his tongue focused on your clit before adding two fingers on your hole practically eating and fingering you like there's no tomorrow.

He can feel that you're close even if you won't say it or... don't have the ability to say it. You were far up to the stars and he will happily take you there. And just like what you want, a knot is slowly building in your stomach, the pleasure was so good that you finally started to let go following with moans.

Jay hummed on your pussy, riding your pleasure like a good man that he is. Keeping his pace unturned as it sends waves of pleasure throughout your whole body making you breathless.

You felt jay checking on you, ensuring you're comfortable enough as if he didn't just made you lose your mind using only his mouth and fingers a few minutes ago. "You okay? I'll do it now" He asked, innocently. You simply nod, still catching your breath that the man took away.

"Shut up... and, just do me" The man chuckled kissing your lips then pulling away to remove his belt and pants to finally show his hardness.

You propped up through your elbows, "Are you sure that'll fit?" Jay laughed at your worried yet amazed face. "So cute!" He crawled on top of you, "Don't worry, I'll make it less painful, love." You felt him spreading your legs further using his, and he felt how you tensed causing him to kiss you again.

Jay used his hand to run his cock up and down spreading your wetness and hitting your clit on the process. The stunt made you relax that he used to his advantage.

He suddenly thrust, fully. "Fucking shit! You-you're so big, Jay" You cursed feeling the pain on your lower body causing you to push yourself up.

Jay shivered on what you said, hugging your body trying not to fuck you mindlessly. "C-lose... shit, you're so tight" He can feel your hotness. It's making him lose his mind. This is better than heaven itself. You are better than life can offer to him.

"You can move now..." And, he did. No need to tell him twice. He started experimental thrust before picking up his pace when he felt you finally feeling it as your moans became louder, breaths becoming deeper and words becoming more lewd.

"Ugh! Shit, Jay. Yes! There!" You screamed scratching his back voluntarily spreading your legs to make him thrust deeper.

"I'm gonna... J-jay..." You whispered to him. Slapping of skin, moans and grunts filled the room. You were practically screaming all the pleasures, eyes shut tight.

"Cum inside. It's fine."

Jay didn't answer but the way his dick twitched inside let you know he understands. "Cum with me, love" He groaned, hastening his thrust, with one last curse both of you cum together painting your inside with thick white.

Both of you didn't move, still chasing your breaths, trying to recover from the waves of pleasure that's still running through your bodies.

"Don't move..." You whispered on his ears. You felt him kissed your cheeks, "So, this is your newfound kink. You want me to breed you?"

"Will you?"

"Don't mind me if I do." You both laughed, "I need to clean you though." And, you let him. Jay slowly pulled away from your hole making you gasped. You immediately felt the warm and thick cum sliding through your inner thighs and into the bed.

He wear his boxer again before disappearing to one of the room that you deemed as the bathroom. You took the time to slowly sit up looking at the evidence of your purity, and there it is the red stain that looks kind of prideful in your opinion.

When jay came again, he got some towels and a basin on his hands. "What? Can't believe that you just lost your virginity to me?"

"Yes, and no. I don't regret it at all. It's just that... that you're my boss." You replied, shyness taking toll on your system that you tried to hide by laying down and closing your eyes again.

The next thing you felt is a warm towels that jay is using to clean your body, "You alright?"

It feels so nice that you just answered with a hum.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure"

"What are we?"

You felt the towel stopped as if he was also thinking but then it continues, "Depends om what you want. Just remember that I like you"

You opened your eyes to look at him, "Like me... you mean?" He nodded, "But, how? I mean, we just met yesterday night."

"Maybe to you. I know you since the first time I worked at the company. We're both an intern that time. Dad asked me to go work by disguise to let me learn about the company" Jay explained slowly and when your brain process his words, you unconsciously sit up making you hiss and making jay groaned, uttering a simple 'careful'.

"Wait so you're jongseong? The jongseong that we don't even know the last name since you don't have an ID and you wont tell us."

He chuckled before nodding, "There even a time that you doubted me whether I truly worked at the company before." Jay then helped you wear one of his clothes to make you further comfy.

"You just vanished, I thought you're not real."

"Dad made me managed the business overseas. It took me three years to come back again. Last night, I can't believe I'll see you again just a day after I came back. You didn't chang, except that you became more beautiful, but other than that, you're still the woman that I admired. You danced truly enjoying yourself not for the other people and that's when I realized that you're the same person I want to see." Oh, so his the same person that observing me from the second floor yesterday. Jay cleaned himself then lay beside me, he covered both our bodies in the duvet before pulling me closer. I turned around to face him, I want to see him closer.

"I was planning to surprise you at work the next day, not as the president though." He continued, tucking some of my stubborn hair. "But then, imagine the shocked my body went through when you told me to take you. Seriously, my mind went blank. I can't... I am relieved that you walk to me and not another men."

"Whatever it is. Just remember that I like you, and I wanted to know more about this feelings. We can take it slow, I can wait. Just let me have the chance to prove myself to you" You smiled, you can feel that he's genuine and trying to walk on eggshells around you trying not to scare you.

You put your hands on his nape, closing your eyes. "Okay, let's do that."

© hrdenha 2023

[yandere-paramour]

hi! i was reading your blog for quite a while, and wanted to say that i really enjoy reading things you write!! thank you so much, it gives me pretty much comfort during study days (hope that didn't sound weird)

anyway what are your thoughts on Darling who is in her 20s and still a uni student? (maybe some Atalanta headcanons... she is my fav)

No, I know EXACTLY what you mean, I'm clawing myself through grad school right now and I NEED my yandere accounts to keep me sane on those days when you have to lock in and study 6 hours. I'm really glad you like my writing, it makes me so happy that I am reaching people :)

Atalanta with a College Student

Of course, Ata takes you the second she finds you. She just can't help herself, she has to have her love near her

But after all your kicking and screaming and begging her not to interrupt your studies, she relents

The Montclairs highly prize education, and even though Atalanta wants you, she doesn't want to ruin your degree over it; she really doesn't want you to hate her

And you're so young, she doesn't want to ruin your university experience because of her own needs

So you and she decide on a compromise

You can stay at university and will continue to go to classes and be a good Darling, and in return she gets to be in your life

You will move into a safe apartment she picks for you with one of her trusted bodyguards, and they guard will accompany you (discretely) everywhere you go, for your own safety

Atalanta will come see you several times a week to get to know you and eventually you will graduate, she will become your girlfriend, and she will marry you

You, having no choice if you want to keep even a little freedom, agree

The apartment is gorgeous. No one will tell you the exact price but you can tell it is expensive. Everything is clean and modern, and you have a bedroom and an office to yourself. Atalanta says your areas for sleeping and working should be separate for your health

The guard is a really nice woman who basically watches over you, and it feels refreshing to go about your day unconcerned that anyone will harass or kidnap you

You never have to cook or clean, and anything you even mention wanting shows up at your apartment the next day

Atalanta even allows you to go out and have fun, provided you take the guard with you and you don't engage in any substances (which you weren't interested in anyway)

You have lots more time to study and sleep and engage in your hobbies, and you're eating better than you have since you were a toddler

The only thing you're unsure about is Atalanta

Four times a week you come home to find her sitting at your kitchen table, quietly working on documents while she waits for you

She always greets you with a smile and a hug, and you can't help but admit her hugs are warm and comforting

She asks about your day and eats with you, choosing to spend the evening doing whatever you want

She seems to be just happy to spend life in your presence, looking at you like you are the sun in the sky

She never overstays her welcome, she always knows when you're overwhelmed and you need her to leave.

She gently and chastely kisses your cheek and bids you goodbye, having a short word to your guard that you can't hear

You don't know how you feel about her

She's striking and thoughtful you certainly have some complicated feelings for her you try to work out underneath your blankets, but you're still a kid and you don't know if you're really ready for something like this

She's a beautiful, intelligent, queer CEO of a company that runs your city, and you're just... you. You don't know if you're really worthy of standing by her side.

In the car, Ata frowns at the sight on her phone. Her precious Darling is feeling... unloved? Undeserving? Inadequate? Ata won't stand for it.

A few texts to Noelle and Ata has arranged to take you out for dinner next week where she will present you with a promise ring, a symbol of her earnest devotion to you and her commitment to make you hers as soon as you graduate.

"Just you wait, Darling," Ata whispers to your visage on her phone as you blink your tears back, "Just a little longer. I'll make it all better soon."

[sgiddings]

hiiiii, do you have any jossam hcs you've never talked about?? I love your blog btw <3

hello lovely anon! oh, thank you so much! it means the world to me. of course, i've had some headcanons brewing up in the back of my brain for years now;

i don't think josh is a lady's man or what have you by any means possible. i think he has always been a loner whether that be romantic or platonic wise, rami said on josh himself that he's a loner. i think josh has always had a crush on sam from the day he met her, it's always been hard for him to feel anything for anyone else in that regard. has he fooled around a little? sure, but nothing with anyone that ever lasted long. i think further proof on his lack of experience with women or romance in general is the way he talks to chris about ashley. oh boy. he's been whipped for too long, the flings he's had with people would make his skin crawl by the end of it, he didn't want them. he wanted sam.

josh isn't really a massive social media person, he'll only create an account for something if sam asks him to. like instagram, he's really only there for sam (@evildeadgf inspired this headcanon, she has a very cute jossam ig edit) and will only post yearly if at all, but he's always liking a post whenever sam uploads something there. he's not chronically online per se but his presence around his girlfriend is known. back off!!!

speaking of sam's instagram, she's always taking very handsome photos of him and adding them to her stories and her "dump" photos, you know the ones where people will just post a random monthly post with a bunch of different photos from that month, a lot of those photos include josh and her and josh together, and them with their dog.

fairly new headcanon for me inspired by unused audio file of sam talking to her mum. sam's mum would always hound her about chris, sam has no idea where her mum even got this idea from, or how she even thought of it to begin with, but her dad's always had an inkling of what's really going on. he notices the way josh stares at his daughter. sam knows that he knows, and they don't say anything about it, they just have a silent sort of agreement to respect each other's peace. post mountain, josh is one of the first people her dad asks sam about. sam can barely keep it together.

i think to keep himself sane a little more tethered to the world, helping him to wade through his own problems, josh would have to keep his focus on something, maybe starting a new creative project - nothing too out there, could be just to keep his hands busy. making props? who knows, the world is his oyster and he is very intelligent. sam loves to watch him create, she loves the determination in his eyes and the way his brows furrow together whenever he's working at something. josh notices, throws a little "checkin' me out?" joke at her, and she can't help but laugh.

sam wakes up early and josh does not wake up early. sometimes sam will get up around 4 in the morning just to go hiking and take the dog for a walk, and she'll find josh still awake in the living room. "oh c'mon. go to bed." "not tired yet." "you're gonna wake up dead in the afternoon again." "fine with me, gives me more time at night to do what i want." "like what?" "stuff." "what stuff?" "like watch you sleep." "(laugh) okay edward cullen, shut it. i'll go make you some tea before i leave."

[acourtofinkandpapyrus]

My Little Shadow: Part two (Azriel X Reader)

Warnings!: Abusive family, toxic relationship, arranged marriage.

Part one here: Part one

Part three

Thank you for all the people who like and re-blogged my last post! I couldn't believe so many people liked my story, so I worked hard to make sure I had the second part out today! Prepare for two shadowsingers to meet. As Y/N and Azriel meet again, is it the beginning of a friendship, or something more?

The past two weeks had been a nightmare, more so than usual.

After returning to my father’s home, he beat me senseless, afterward throwing me into my room and locking it from the outside.

No one had returned to even bring me food, although luckily I had saved some in a hidden spot for times just like this.  I had thought that one day I would need to hide myself, my mother, or my sisters from his wrath.

I would have never imagined this scenario, but I probably should have.

I was his only daughter born before Amarantha’s reign.  He had managed to keep us off her radar, but it had only helped so much.  And then somewhere in there, he decided that he wanted another child.  Seeing no end in sight to our stay under the mountain, he went for it.

Thinking about back then, about what I had done to keep my sisters safe, I clenched my hands, the old scars that ran up my back, legs, and arms hurting again.

I felt a cold hand on my shoulder, attempting to soothe me.

I smiled.  There was one thing they could never take away.

After I had first learned how to speak with the shadows, I had discreetly done as much research as I possibly could.  I knew that different shadows preferred different ways of presenting themselves, and had seen it myself.

But these shadows had followed me from that horrible cell under the mountain, becoming the only one I could trust.  They take the form of a human woman, most likely one they had seen before who wouldn’t be using it anymore.

I couldn’t make out any facial features, and if they stood real still they looked like nothing more than my shadow, but if you looked closely, you might notice how it seems darker than it should, and that when you look at them from a certain angle you noticed that sometimes they were not flat against the wall, but their own entity entirely.

They helped me stay sane under the mountain, and now they were doing the same again as I wondered what would happen when my bedroom door finally opened.

I rested my head against the wall, the chill soothing my stressed mind.

After only a moment of this, I heard my door make a resounding click as someone unlocked it.

I whipped around, standing straight with my arms behind my back, back to being the respectful daughter.

I knew my shadows had gone back to hiding, still nearby in case anything was required of them.

My father opened the door, his clothes and hair more regal and pristine than usual.

“Get yourself dressed, we have an event to attend to.”  He said unemotionally, walking away and leaving the door wide open.

Dread pooled in my stomach.  Whatever this was, I already knew it wasn’t going to be good.

I put on one of my more plain dresses, hoping to attract as little attention as possible.  I stalled for time, taking as long as possible to do my hair.

Maybe I could attempt to stay with one of my friends until Draven gave up on this whole arranged marriage thing.  Though I had no clue which of them would sell me out for the most measly of rewards.  Maybe all of them would.

Eventually, I could stall no more, my father in the doorway, watching me with dark beady eyes.

“Do I have my sweet little girl back, or am I to have to deal with this ungrateful little thing that’s taken her place?”  He asked, placing his hands on my shoulders as he peered into the mirror, looking me in the eye.

I swallowed the hatred that bubbled up, the urge to take the delicate handle of my hair brush and plunge it deep into his chest.  I met his eyes, letting none of that show as I spoke meekly, “I’m sorry for my previous outburst father, I promise never to speak to you like that again.”

He lifted a hand to stroke my hair, his expression almost sweet as he smiled, speaking low, “Good, I love you my darling girl.  You are making me proud, and helping all of us.  Never forget that.”

I forced myself not to shiver as he kissed my head before leaving the room.

Getting up to follow him, I took a few calming breaths, stealing myself for whatever may come.

After surviving years under the mountain, this should be nothing.  But sometimes it felt as if I had more freedom then, than I ever will again.

Everyone was gathered in the main room, waiting for me.

None of them spoke a word to me as my father opened the door, and we all followed him out.

I had three younger sisters, and to my father’s disappointment, no brothers.  My sisters crowded around me, offering silent comfort, my mother walking at my fathers side.

Was that what my life was going to look like after the marriage?  Living a life in silent fear, with no hope of a better future as I was forced to watch my own children be sold away.

I started to feel sick again.

We eventually stopped in a hall and I recognised the rest of the way, leading the way to the living quarters of Keir.

“All of you stay here, and talk to no one.” My father instructed as he straightened the lapel of his jacket.

He looked at me, and I lowered my head as he spoke, “When I call for you, you will behave like the lady you are.  Or there will be consequences.  Understood?”

I nodded, not meeting his stare.

He made a smug noise before turning and walking the rest of the way down the hall.  Keir opened the door after one knock, ushering him in quickly.

We stood there in silence for another moment before I felt a hand grasp mine.  “It’ll be okay.”

I looked down to see my youngest sister grabbing my hand.  She was too young to understand the difference between this place and Under the Mountain.

I gave her a little smile, placing a reassuring hand on her head.  “Of course it’ll be alright.  It may seem scary now, but remember what we always say-”

We both spoke at the same time, “Nothing can hurt us as long as we’re together.”

She looked up at me, her eyes wet with the beginning of tears.  “But we aren’t going to be together.”

I knew that if my father saw, he would scold me, but I pulled her close into a tight embrace.  “It’ll be alright darling, nothing can come between sisters.”

I let her go, quickly smoothing out my dress.

Feeling eyes on me, I looked up to see my mother quickly looking away.

I knew this wasn’t the life she had wanted either.  She used to tell me stories of her family, who hadn’t lived in Hewn City but had been just as cruel.  They had sold her to my father, just as he was now going to sell me.

Keir’s door opened, and my father poked his head out beckoning me in.

I obediently came to him, and he pulled me inside, shutting the door quickly behind us.

Keir’s taste in decor was awful.  Everything had edges sharp enough to draw blood and there was almost no color in anything.  It had a somewhat normal sitting situation, but what intrigued me was the painting that hung in the middle of the room, the subject of the portate being solidly him, with all of his family except his daughter sitting around him.

I swear I could see where she had been painted out.

“So this is the daughter you wish to wed to Draven?”  Kier asked from the large chair he was lounging in, a disgusting smile on his face as he studied me.

Don’t react, don’t show what you think.

“Yes, say hi Y/N.”

“Hello.”  I said meekly, not looking either of them in the eye.

I heard the floor creak, not realizing Keir had gotten up until he was tugging my chin upwards, forcing me to look him in the eyes.

“Hmmmm.”  He hummed as he studied my bruised face before letting me go.

“I heard about her little outburst earlier this month.  If anyone will be able to tame her, it will be Draven.  You have my approval.”

My stomach churned, and I wanted to scream, not hearing the self satisfied words they were passing back and forth now that my fate had been sealed.

I only came back to reality when my father placed a hand on my shoulder.  “Did you hear me Y/N?  I said it’s time to go.”

I bowed my head, following him out and back to my family.

Apparently, my house arrest was over, because once we made it back to one of the more public halls, he announced he would be at home celebrating if anyone needed him or my mother, dragging her off.

Two of my sisters were quick to rush off, but My youngest sister, Stella, stayed by my side as my eyes unfocused, unable to breathe as the panic struck me in full force.

Stella hugged me, and I wrapped my arms around her tightly, breathing in her scent of sugar, dust, and warmth, knowing that soon I would never see her again except in passing.

“You should go hang out with your friends.”  I managed to say once I calmed down enough.

Her eyes were wide as she pulled back, studying my face.

I forced myself to smile as I ruffled her hair, saying in a falsely cheery tone, “Hey!  Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.  I’ma figure out how to fix all of this, okay?”

She nodded slowly, and I planted a quick peck on her forehead.  “Now go!  I’ll be fine.”

I waited until her scent had completely aired out before I let the tears fall, quietly sobbing as I realized that this was the end of my life.

For a little while, the only sound was my gasping sobs until I heard footsteps in the distance.

I covered my mouth, quieting myself even father as I listened.

My shadow companion manifested next to me, obviously noticing the steps as well.

I pondered on whether I should leave, I had already gotten myself in enough trouble, and I dreaded to think about the consequences if I was once again caught doing something my father would punish me for.

But something about the saltwater, baked goods, and dark male scent struck something in me.  I knew it from somewhere, but for some reason I couldn’t place from where.

I once again looked to my shadows.

There was something we had learned to do.  I wasn’t sure if it had never been documented, or if we were the first to be able to do this little trick, but I had never found anything about it.

I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, I could see the world through a dark mist.

My shadows and I could become one in a way, turning me into a shadowy figure that could hide at will.

I could feel the shadows concern for me, and I sighed.  “I’ll be fine, don’t be so fussy” I whispered right before I stretched my head around the corner, my breath catching as I saw who stood there.

Azriel.

I watched him, standing there with something like rage on his features as he paced back and forth, his shadows curling around his ear.

I could feel my shadows' curiosity.  They loved interacting with shadows from different places, learning the stories they held of other lands.

Sometimes I wondered if they wanted out of this place even more than I did.

As I thought about this I wasn’t watching the Illerian male.  And so didn’t notice when he spotted me until he spoke.

“Hello there.”

I practically jumped out of my skin when I heard him speak, preparing to turn and run when one of his shadows reached me, tugging me into full view.

Luckily with my shadows and I being one, I would only look like a stark shadow.

“Who are you?”  He asked, not necessarily angry as he approached me, his shadows loosening their grip on my waist.

“Does it matter?”  I asked, my voice silkier in this form than normal.

He smirked.  “It does if you were spying on me.”  He said, and I saw the blue siphons on his armor glow threateningly.

This is normally where I would apologize, play nice until they realized I was no threat.

But he didn’t know who I was, and I was already boiling over with rage.

“If I wanted to spy on you, I wouldn’t have been caught.”  I say as I take a step through his shadows, his expression flickered to one of shock for just a millisecond before turning back into stone.

“Then what were you doing here?”  He asked, his head tilting as he looked down at me.

I grinned, looking up at him.  “Well, I was minding my own business when I heard some footsteps.  Really, I should be asking you what you’re doing here.”

His lips twitched upwards as he looked down at me.  “I’m waiting for someone to come meet me, but now I’m wondering if I should reschedule.”

My heart started to beat faster with the way he stared down at me, his gaze intense.  “And why is that?”

He grinned now.  “I don’t think I’ve ever met a shadow quite like you.”

I was trying to think of some response that wasn’t just embarrassed babbling when we both heard footsteps coming closer.

Without a moment's hesitation I turned and ran.  He called out after me, but I ignored it, knowing better than to stay around and see who was coming.

Eventually when I was closer to home, I let my shadows unwind, taking their own form again.

“Thank you.”  I whispered to them, and I could feel their happiness.

Meanwhile, I was once again spiraling, but for none of the same reasons as before.

What had I been thinking, taunting the high lord’s spymaster like that?  There were so many bad things that could happen.  What if he found out that I wasn’t just some shadow?  What if he found out who I was and told my father?

I took a deep calming breath.

He didn’t know who I was, and so there was nothing that he could do to me.

More confident, and something else than my impending doom to think about, I went home.

As I opened the door, my father cheered, “She’s back!  My precious daughter who is going to be our salvation.”

My mother was sitting in his lap, and I quickly looked away as I headed for my room.

“Oh, and sweetheart,”  My father said, drawing my attention back to him as he continued, “The date is set, in a little over a month you’ll be married!”

He laughed, happy as could be as he nuzzled my mother’s neck.

I felt sick.  About how soon I would lose my last scraps of freedom, how even though I could see the well hidden disgust on my mother’s face, she let him touch her, his hands gripping her hips so tight it must be painful.

As I went into my room and closed and locked the door, I couldn’t help but hope I would run into Azriel again, despite the risks.

[reachexceedinggrasp]

I have a feeling you might relate to this or you might have even related this on your blog already, but I was just thinking of that Ghoul quotation water water everywhere and not a drop to drink

I think probably my favourite, maybe ever, quiet point of characterisation in a sort of villainous or Beast love interest is his or her having a poet's soul... whether that is conscious or unconscious romantic meditation. It's like Kylo musing to Rey when he says 'You have that look in your eyes. From the forest. When you called me a monster' I love that sort of wistful observation, especially because it evokes such potent imagery ('when we fought together in the forest and then you marked yourself on my face'). Or more literally something like Ghoul citing a line of literature, even when none around except for Lucy would know what he's referencing, it's for his own arrestment and amusement, this is how he sees/interacts with the world

I guess in that way, it reveals something new about their perspective on the world, even when they're somebody seemingly cut off from it - monstrous, othered, repellent, ugly - when they're able to articulate a certain beauty which other characters may not remark upon. It's sort of covetous in that sense, but I think it also sort of helps explain what might interest them about a Beauty, after all, there's something they long for and value (spiritual, aesthetic, existential beauty).

I thought you might be able to relate 🥰

Oh, totally. And with Cooper and Ben, specifically, which is a parallel I hadn't actually noticed until you've just pointed it out, we're being shown their sensitivity as characters. Not in the sense of being considerate, but that they're aware and alert to beauty and meaning in the world despite currently occupying a narrative role which might make us think they're simply destructive or nihilistic figures. And despite the cynicism they're both ostensibly espousing.

Cooper quotes or alludes to literature practically constantly relative to how little he speaks, always knowing people almost certainly won't understand him, and that's especially fascinating because he didn't make those kinds of references in the flashbacks. We could take this in a whole direction about how he created the Ghoul as a character to shield himself from the things he had to do to survive and is living within a meta-narrative deconstructing the reactionary anti-hero who overtook the white hat sheriff he used to play in his movies. The anti-hero he never wanted to be. He makes allusions because his life has become a story he's telling himself to stay sane. He's his own wry Dickensian narrator making asides to an imagined audience about dramatic irony and social commentary.

And an important part of his presentation to others before the war was painting himself as not sophisticated. Just a cowboy and then just a guy who plays a cowboy in the movies. He wants nothing to do with politics either in an interpersonal or broader sense, and disclaims any pretensions to being savvy despite being in a theoretically powerful position as a rich, well-connected major film star. I think he was genuinely naive, but I also think he often played dumb to avoid social conflict. He was complacent and his image helped him remain complacent. Obviously he was very willing to be confrontational when he saw wrong or injustice right in front of him (he goes after Bud Askins directly to his face about marines getting killed by shitty equipment, he challenges Moldaver when she calls him out), but pre-bombs he mostly uses his empathic perceptiveness and charisma to keep everyone around him happy.

In the wasteland we often see him doing the opposite and deliberately riling people up in order to gather information and assess or eliminate them as threats, but he's also only gotten better at disarming people when he wants to. As a handsome charming film star he pretended not to know anything, as a scary intimidating monster he pretends he knows everything.

What I'm wondering about as far as all this goes is whether Cooper always had a secret nerdy side and read all the classics as a teenager or perhaps while waiting between shots when he was working as a stuntman, or whether he wanted to fit in when he started to make it in Hollywood so tried to become cultured before realising that wasn't what anyone wanted from him. Or if he just spent 200 years alone and read anything he could find as a way to cling to his humanity. We know he was at least a bit intellectually curious before the war, because of his reading and retaining some article about studies on torture.

But YES, him quoting poetry and being so interested and insightful about Lucy, specifically is a huge part of how he's framed as a romantic figure. And he's already by far the most romantic figure in the show. If it were solely about his tragedy, you'd think they would emphasise the contrast between his pre-fallen and post-fallen state by stripping him of his heroic trappings, but they don't. He's actually more romantic post-'curse'.

It also gets me because he's an extremely smart, socially adept person who doesn't let others see him for who he really is both consciously and unconsciously on multiple levels and that layers of identity shit is my crack. He was a profoundly honest man who thought he was simple, but actually he was a glorious maze of contradiction and complexity waiting to happen who has now come into his own as a master manipulator.

[bindeds]

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 100 FOLLOWERS ! — i genuinely can’t believe i’ve come this far with posting my brainrot for hazbin. it has and will continue to be such an honor to keep posting for you guys, and to celebrate you guys i’ve prepared a little something for you guys, hehe!

requests.

i am willing to do any requests you guys might have which includes art, gifs, character ships (radioapple, huskerdust, etc) and of course character x reader ships despite generally being an x reader blog. though of course as any sane person would, i am not entertaining angel x val.

some fics along the way …

i have been cooking up something specifically for lucifer though nothing is confirmed yet except for the fact that i want to make a longer fic for him (AT LEAST 10k words long), but i’m kinda having trouble for the plot so this kinda connects to the first thing which if you have any ideas for me to write i am implore you to hit up my askbox, please! i’m gonna need all the help i can get! i’ve also gotten a radioapple worm in my head and the premise is too good not to act on though i will say it will be shorter than the lucifer fic. because of this both of these will be on my ao3 so stay tuned!

selfships.

i thought it would be cool for you guys to tell me a bit about yourself and then from there i pick a character from hazbin/helluva (depending on which show you prefer) that i think you would like/be with romantically (or even queerplatonically for the aro/aces out there)!! i’ve seen other people do this as well and they do 3-pic moodboards sometimes and i’d love to do that for you guys! or if you guys wanna go in depth i could also make short fics dedicated to you personally upon request!

get to know me + qna!

besides all the stuff that’s stated in my pinned, i’ve been writing since i was 10 (i am 18) and i’ve wanted to be a published author for the longest time, though as i grew older i realized there’s a lot of other ways i can get my stories out to the world, like screenwriting, animating (or being both the creator and writer of my own show AHEM totally not talking about hazbin) so i’m not really sure of things yet, but i will say i’ve learned a lot about writing since i first started and even though i know this is all for fun, i take the way i write things seriously, so any constructive feedback you might have will be valuable to me! anyway, i have A LOT of opinions on everything hazbin/helluva so you can ask about those or more about me! i’m a very open person so i like to give in depth responses. but yeah feel free to ask about my opinions on helluva/hazbin as well as my personal life too!

another thing i wanted to disclose about myself since i feel comfortable after having met such wholesome people after starting this blog, is that i have been through abuse very similar to angel dust’s meaning his character meant a lot to me and he was my favorite character when the pilot first came out so yeah! definitely ask me about angel too if you have anything to ask!

[captainlunaxmen]

All for the Cameras

Chapter 3

Finnick Odair x reader

This is a repost since the old blog doesn't work anymore. 🥰

Chapter summary: the plan is in motion

Chapter warnings: prostitution, drug use (on the bad guy, but still)

Masterlist

It's been a month since the talk with Plutarch... and I still can't believe it.

The rebellion is actually happening, district 13 still exists!

These are the thoughts that keep my mind sane. Plutarch said we need to be careful, he might have a plan... but we need people we can trust.

Of course.

I try to think of some people that would gladly help and that can be also trusted while I walk into the building Cal lives in. Unfortunately the rebellion hasn't properly started and I still have "duty" to do.

I take a deep breath as I enter the elevator and close my eyes for a moment, enough time for another person to enter with me. And I already know who this is.

"Finnick," I nod my head greeting him and open my eyes as the doors close.

"Sweetheart," he sends me one of his charming smile and nods his head too.

The ride to the last floor is pretty long and slow, it gives time for a small, awkward silence to fall for a while before Finnick speaks up.

"I heard... you know." He says, hands behind his back casually.

"Everybody knows apparently..." I sigh.

"Yeah... people can't stop talking about it. The talk of the town."

"If he wanted it to be a surprise, well, oops" I roll my eyes.

"He's been..." he pauses for a moment, shakes his head and looks up with an angry smile.

"What?" I press, "more possessive? More obsessed?"

"Yeah, since you left for the Victory tour he..." he starts, but I cut him off immediately.

"No, he's been like this since that day," I say, I feel him looking at me, but I don't have the heart of looking back.

"Do.... do you think he heard it?" He hesitantly asks, lowering his voice too, "there's no way he could've heard..."

"He must've. That's the only explanation." I tell him, lowering my own voice. "You chose the worse time of all."

"Well, I'm sorry... okay? I... wasn't thinking," he apologies.

"Clearly." I take another deep breath before speaking again, "you know sometimes I try to come out with as many way of killing him I can. Each of them ends up with me getting caught, because unfortunately he is who he is... but it helps."

"How many did you get last time?" He asks, a hint of an amused smile on his face.

"I think... uh... 6," I say, "oh no, 7... almost forgot about the spoon one."

He actually laughs and it helps me too, knowing that in the end we're on the same boat.

"I think... 13 would've been better." He says, he kind of emphasises the number. That makes my head turn to him, him already looking at me with a serious expression.

Could it be..?

So I dare ask.

"Did you talk to Plutarch?"

I see him opening his mouth to answer, but before anything could come out of it, the elevator's doors open and we are greeted by Cal himself ready with two glasses of wine.

"Welcome back, my lovelies." He cheers and he hands us the drinks, "finally all together. C'mon, c'mon."

As we enter his huge apartment I try to look at Finnick to get that answer, he does look at me, but I can't understand.

"Alright, let's sit for a bit, uh?" Cal lead us to his living room, motioning to a huge wooden table... with only two seats...

Cal take a seat and looks at us, expecting.

"Uhm... should I go get another seat or..?" Finnick tries to take it lightly, but one thing is worse than having to spend the night with Cal Kingslay... not knowing what Cal Kingslay has in store.

"Oh no need, c'mon Finnick sit." Cal tells him and Finnick obeys, looking at me confused.

"And.. what about me?" I ask, also trying to play it cool.

"Oh before you sit," Cal stands up to come up to me, it takes everything in me not to take a step back... or even run, "I got a little gift for you. It's in the bedroom."

"Aw.. that's sweet, but you really shouldn't have." I say, hoping he doesn't feel the tremble in my voice.

"We have to make up for lost time, sweetheart. Now go, then come back here." He instructs.

"Sure..." I fake smile at him, steal a quick glance at a tense Finnick and head to the bedroom.

The bedroom, just as huge, hosts a big round bed, a small couch in front of it and nothing much else. I notice a package on the bed, I go to open and find... of course...

I scoff as I look at the deep red lingerie set he bought me. I put it on, constantly rolling my eyes, the only act of defiance I can afford, I wear the matching rope and head back to the living room.

"Oh look at her!" Cal exclaims as I near, "I knew that was your color. Isn't she a beauty, Finnick?"

"Yes." Is all Finnick says, his eyes fixed on me with a loving, yet sad, expression in them.

Cal suddenly grabs my hand and pull me to him, making me sit in his lap.

"Alright, now let's chat a little." He says as his hands caress my thighs and sides, whatever he could touch, "I really want to know what happened on this tour."

"Well... nothing much, really. Usual tour... with two victors, but the usual," I laugh it off, putting my hands on Cal's in a poor attempt of keeping them steadier.

I look at Finnick, who's even more tense than before, eyes locked on Cal's hands on me.

"So nothing happened?" Cal presses, grip getting tighter, " nothing? Not even with Peeta Mellark?"

I actually laugh at that.

"With Peeta?" I ask, "why?"

"At the party, at the President's residence, the way he touched you..." he holds me tighter.

"He just wanted to dance, Cal... he's so in love with Katniss, he doesn't look at anyone else." I try to chuckle to make him see how absurd his assumptions are.

"Then why not ask any other woman there?" He keeps holding me.

I look at Finnick, who's ready to jump into action, but at the same time knows he can't do anything.

"Because he's shy." I say, "he might seem like an outgoing guy, but he's really not. He asked me probably because I'm his friend. " I try to stress the word 'friend' to make him understand.

"Yeah, I got to talk to him for a few minutes when they were in 4, he didn't talk much, only awkwardly smiled and let out just a few words." Finnick lies, and thanks to that Cal lets go a little, going back at caressing my thighs. I look at Finnick grateful and he slightly nods.

"You have a talent in making people feel at ease with you, don't you?" Cal compliments and rest his chin on my shoulder, "I really missed you. Did you miss me too?"

"Oh, but of course," I fake another smile as he starts to kiss my neck.

His kisses get more heated as he goes, I look everywhere except Finnick, I can't stand it, not after last time.

"Mmh, fuck," he breaths out, "you smell so good, my sweetness, let's go to the bedroom, shall we, lovelies?"

Cal doesn't give me any time to stand up, he picks me up and, bridal style, he takes me to the bedroom, followed by Finnick.

Cal gently puts me on the bed, goes and sits down on the small couch.

"Take your clothes of, Finnick, leave your underwear on," he instructs, getting comfortable on the couch.

Finnick does as he was told, standing only in his underwear. He's surely been working out while I was gone...

"I want you on your knees in front of her," Cal orders him, "and you, my precious princess, spread those legs for him, okay?"

Finnick comes kneel in front of me, I spread my legs to let him in, avoiding his eyes, that, I know are on me.

"Oh that's good." Cal praises, "now, touch her."

I softly gasp at feeling Finnick's hand on my thigh.

"Not too much, Finnick, you know the rules. No kissing unless I say so."

Finnick only nods and keeps on caressing my tigh bringing it a little closer so his face lightly touches it.

"Look at him, sweetheart, look at him,"

This is how these meetings usually go: Cal tells us how he wants to see us, what he wants us to do, sometimes he just likes to watch and sometimes he like to "play" too.

I don't know if he's so delusional to think we too enjoy this or he just loves control so much that he doesn't care at all.

That's how the "date" went, all night.

Cal enjoying his power over us, he particularly enjoyed teasing Finnick.

"How does it feel like? Knowing she'll never be yours?" He would ask. "You wouldn't be able to touch her if it wasn't for me," "You'll never see her unless I say so." And so on...

"I'll see you soon, my loves," Cal says, leading us back to the elevator, his hand in mine.

"It's never going to be too soon," Finnick's charming smile seems to convince him.

"Never," I agree as we're standing in front of the elevator.

Cal spins me around and kisses me. I'm so stunned, I don't even reciprocate until he squeezes my waist.

"I could never get enough of that," Cal humms, letting me go.

"Feeling's mutual," I say turning around, grateful for the doors to open in that moment.

"Bye bye" he waves and we do the same, keeping up our fake smiles until the doors finally close.

"Oh fuck..." I let out a sigh of relief and unconsciously lean against Finnick's taller frame, who gently wraps an arm around me.

"Feeling's mutual," Finnick says, sighing too.

"Okay... uh... listen," I start, pulling away from his embrace, "we do need to find a way to talk. This ride might be long, but it's not enough..."

"I know... I might have an idea, but you'll have to trust me," he tells me confidently.

"What is it?" I ask.

"Trust me, alright?"

I sigh, but nod.

"Main things... uh... did you talk to Plutarch then?"

"That I did, asked for my company, I thought he was one of the usual stuff, but thankfully it wasn't." He tells me, "you?"

"Same thing, do you know anyone else... knowing?" I ask.

"There are lots of victors who might be involved, but I can't say for sure..." he speaks quietly, "maybe Johanna..."

"Definitely believable," I comment, "you know, I think Haymitch too.. both him and Plutarch said the same exact thing to me and... it just makes sense."

"What about the lovebirds?" He says making quotations with his fingers as he says 'lovebirds'.

"I don't think so..." I shake my head, "Katniss is too focused on wanting to protect her family, to think of a rebellion."

"Alright... it's still a start, don't you think?" He smiles at me.

"Yeah..." I say bitterly.

"What's that tone?" He's concern now.

"Nothing... I just don't want to keep my hopes up, you know?" I look down at my hands, avoiding his eyes.

"Hey... C'mon, look at me, Y/n." He gently takes my hand and pulls me to him.

I reluctantly, but not so much, look up at him, at his reassuring eyes. Sometimes all I want to do is get lost in them and never find my way back, but it's a luxury I can't afford, not right now.

I shake my head turning away from him.

"Listen... I want to hope we might have a shot, okay? I really do... it's just hard after everything," I say, bouncing my leg.

"I know," he sighs, "but, I mean, we've been hoping this whole time... might as well keep it up."

"I guess..." I smile at him, losing myself again in his eyes, I see him leaning closer, but I stop him, I have to. "Don't."

"I'm sorry..." he awkwardly smiles, "don't push me away like this." He whispers, cautiously taking my hand again, "Please."

"We can't... uh... I don't feel the same way... and... you should..." I stutter out, focusing on our hands instead of his face.

"You know you can't like to me, I know you all too well, love," he chuckles and I shake my head.

"We can't," I say and luckily the doors open and I rush out leaving Finnick behind.

I walk as fast as I can to the car, hoping to get home faster so I can freely cry and scream.

Once I get home I jump on my bed, burying my face in the pillows and just let everything out.

Of all people... why him? Love is so unfair...

No... no, not love... this is not love... I'm not in love with him and he is not in love with me.

That was just a trauma response... yes... yes. Nothing more.

He can't actually love me. If he actually did he could get killed because of it... but if it's not actual love, he's safe... yeah, yeah, he's safe. Nothing to worry about...

This is all I think about as I cry myself to sleep.

----------

"You said what?" I almost yell at Plutarch, almost because I don't want to risk being heard.

"He has to trust me. I can't just say 'leave her alone people will forget about her', can I?" Plutarch sighs, pouring whiskey into my glass, which I gladly take.

"I guess not," I let out a sigh, tapping nervously my glass, "what if you're right, though? What if they actually arrive to hate her so much to kill her themselves?"

"Do you think that would happen?" He asks, knowing already my answer.

"No..." I sit back down, "no, sorry, I'm just... scared shitless, alright?"

He nods understanding.

"I need to ask you one thing, miss L/n, and I need you to be honest," He says and I nod for him to ask away, "do you trust me?"

I look at him properly, trying to see if in his eyes there's even a tiny bit of malice.

"I do." I say.

"Good. There will be some things you shouldn't know, not because you might get caught, but because some things will require a genuine reaction from you," he explains with a serious tone.

"I understand." I nod, "Yeah, no problem. I just hope I would be able to help despite Cal" I say his name with a disgusted noise.

"We'll deal with that too," he reassures me with a small smile.

"Thanks," I say drinking some whiskey, "this thing will never happen too soon."

"I know,"

"May I ask... why do you trust me?" I ask, "I mean, to everyone's eyes I'm Snow's protégé... why do you trust me?"

"Haymitch Abernathy doesn't just trust anyone." Is his simple answer, "I'm sure you know that."

I nod, satisfied with the answer.

"They will send more peacekeepers to 12 tomorrow." He tells me.

"Yeah? I'm sure they're eager to start with the punishments" I comment bitterly.

"Yep."

"Katniss won't just stand there and watch." I warn him.

"I know," he says confidently.

I scan his face, he's not worried about it, he's certain and confident as if he planned it.

"You hope she does something," I accuse.

"Haymitch was right about you," he lightly chuckles, "you are smart."

"Don't change the subject, Heavensbee. This is an opportunity, isn't it?" I ask again, he nods, "if Katniss is the fighter I know she is... you'll get your opportunity."

"We'll get our opportunity," he corrects me raising his glass and I do the same.

"I hope you're right about this rebellion, Heavensbee. I really hope." I say and take a sip of whiskey.

And Katniss did something, indeed. It helped that her best friend was the one getting punished. The fact that both Haymitch and Peeta intervened was even better apparently, according to Plutarch. This is one of the parts of the plan I can't know apparently, but he seemed confident so I trust him...

Hope.

We're all depending on that.

-----------

"We'll finally be able to talk tonight," Finnick whispers to me as we stand in the elevator.

"How?" I ask, confused about what he has in mind.

He smiles and shows me what's inside a little bag he brought. A bottle of wine.

"You're gonna drug him?" I ask shocked.

"A tiny bit," he chuckles, "he'll also need to eat this," he shows me a small box of chocolates, "the drug will activate with both, the wine alone is ineffective."

"Yeah... because not drinking would feel suspicious, but we never eats so if we say no to the chocolate... no problem at all," I reason, "genius."

"I have my moments," he smiles proudly and I return the smile.

"I thought..." he clears his voice, "I thought we could also talk about... us?"

"Finnick..." I warn.

"We would have time..." he insists.

"There's no us, okay? Stop it." I sternly say.

"Keeo telling yourself that," he whispers.

From there the ride is silent until we arrive at Cal's apartment.

"Good evening, loves!" He greets us as usual, "how are my favourite people?"

"A little tired, you know, Snow wanted me to check some old records" I lie, not completely I really am tired, but of him.

"I'm actually fresh as a flower," Finnick starts, "I actually would like to celebrate,"

"Oh really?" Cal asks and grabs my hand to pull me to him.

"Yeah, I found this old bottle of fine wine in my home and I thought 'what better time to drink it if not with Cal Kingslay?', you know?" He takes the bottle out and soon after the box.

"And that?" Cal's intrigued.

"Oh this is a special gift for you, to thank you for your generosity," Finnick's ability to lie and charm him leave me stunned everytime.

"Aw that's sweet of you," Cal takes both the bottle and the box, "we'll share the box, loves."

"Oh, Cal, I'm sorry, but I'll have to gently decline, I ate so much today. Maybe later, okay?" I use the sweetest voice I can as he puts the objects on the table. I try to ignore how Finnick's jaw tense when I do this.

"Whatever you say, princess, as long as you say my name like that..." he turns to me wrapping both arms around my waist to pull me completely against his body.

"Alright, big guy," I try to nonchalantly pull away from him, "let's toast, shall we?"

"Of course!" Cal exclaims, taking the bottle and sending a grateful nod at Finnick. He goes to pour three glasses, "to what should we toast?"

"How about the Quartel Quell?" Finnick asks as he takes the glass from Cal's hand.

"Love that!" Cal cheers handing me a glass too, "here, princess."

"Thank you, Cal," I say, using his name again for good measure and he grins at that.

"To the third Quarter Quell!" Cal raises his glass and we quickly follow.

One each of us took a sip of wine, Finnick goes to open the box, offering it to Cal.

"Here."

"Oh so kind," Cal smirks, "you don't mind if I take two, do you?"

"Oh, but of course not, take as many as you want," Finnick gives him his usual charming smile as Cal takes two chocolates.

"You know I love sweets," Cal says putting both candy in his mouth, "mmh! So good!"

"Old recipe," Finnick explains.

I watch the scene, tense, I hope Finnick's plan works...

Not even moment later, Cal goes to sit holding his head.

"Hey, something wrong?" I fake concern.

"No... no I'm good," Cal tries to stand up again, but apparently his legs can't hold him up.

"Alright, let's get you to bed. Maybe you're just a little more tired than you think," I say, he let me help him to bed.

"Fuck..." he groans, once he's laying down, "I was really in the mood,"

"Don't worry, rest a bit, and if you feel like it later... we're here," I reassure him, but actually hoping he won't.

"Thank you, my love," he says drifting off to sleep.

I cautiously walks back out of the room and back to Finnick.

He looks at me with expectation written all over his face.

"He's asleep," I whisper, with the biggest smile.

"Yes!" He whisper-shouts.

"God... I wish we could do it every single time," I sigh relieved.

"Unfortunately he would get suspicious, but it's a nice dream," Finnick agrees.

"How much time do you think we have?" I ask sitting with him at the table.

"About... 2 hour and a half... maybe more since he took two chocolates," he explains.

"That's great... this might mean we wouldn't even have to do anything at all..." I chuckle and Finnick does too.

"Alright..." he lowers his voice, "I'm pretty sure, a very good part of the Victors are part of this thing"

"Well, Haymitch for sure... but I don't think he will let Katniss and Peeta know anything," I tell him.

"Why not?" He asks frowning.

"Katniss is basically supervised everywhere she goes... it would be too risky..." I explain simply, "do you know what happened today?"

"What?"

"New Peacemakers arrived in 12," I start, "Plutarch suggested more severe punishments,"

"What? Why?" Finnick almost exclaims, there's a deeper frown on his face now.

"It's a way to let himself in, Snow will never trust him otherwise." I sigh, "it sucks, I know. If Snow grows suspicious, we're fucked."

"I know," he sounds defeated.

"But the thing is," I start again, "this, according to Plutarch, created a perfect opportunity. He was so confident today when I saw him leaving a meeting with Snow, I think the plan is in motion."

" I can't fucking believe," he genuinely smiles, "it's really happening... and I mean, can you believe 13 is still alive?"

"I know!" I exclaim in a whisper, I wish I could just shout it sometimes, "it's crazy."

"You know... for the first time I saw some hope in Mags and not just defeat."

I smile at that, I know how important Mags is for him. When I was assigned to assisting district 4's mentors, Mags was always so kind to us... treating us like family.

"That's really nice to hear," I softly say, gently putting a hand on top of his.

He waits a moment before covering my hand with his other one, stroking it gently. I really should pull away, but this gentle, genuine touch is something I haven't felt in a long time. I look up, Finnick's already looking my way with a soft smile.

"You know, I can't wait." He says.

"For..." I clear my voice, "for what?"

"Finally kiss you." He simply states.

"Finnick... for the millionth time..."

"You don't feel the same... yeah, yeah, yeah." He interrupts me, standing up and taking me with him, "you can lie to yourself, but not to me. What I feel for you is-"

"Is not real." It's my turn to interrupt him.

"Oh yeah? Why's that?" He challenges.

"Oh god..." I let out a frustrated sigh, "it's just trauma response, okay? You don't love me, Finn. And I don't love you."

"Okay... so... why didn't you pull away yet and you're letting me, basically, cuddle you?" He challenges again, this actually makes me notice how close we are and how his hands are gently caressing and massaging my body.

I instantly pull away, earning a small laugh from him.

"You really need to stop it," I say, to convince myself, rather than him.

"But you're just so beautiful," he smirks, but it not like Cal's smirk... it's playful, he's not making me uncomfortable, he's just teasing, I know that if he actually made me uncomfortable he would stop right away.

"Alright, stop it." I can't help but let out a chuckle.

"You don't believe yourself either... C'mon." He walks closer to me, "dance with me."

"There's not music and I don't think putting something on will help our case with the sleeping beauty," I remind him.

"Just dance with me, c'mon, love," he holds his hand out for me to take and I do. I let him pull me to him and slowly moving to an imaginary rhythm.

He holds me to me him with so much care I could just melt here and now. I have to admit, it does feel nice.

I just keep reminding myself that it's not love, but two people comforting each other... right?

Right?

As I let Finnick lead, my mind can't help but go to next week event... the announcement of the third Quarter Quell... and my engagement.

I try to shake away the thought and focus on Finnick's body close to mine, how his taller frame is not imposing or constricting, but protective.

I try to focus on the fact that Plutarch's plan is probably going to work... hope.

All I focus about: hope and Finnick.

I'm afraid the two aren't so different for me.

------------

The crowd is cheering like never before.

It's the announcement of the third Quarter Quell, after all.

I watch Snow taking his place in front of all Capitol's citizens, I sit with the rest of 'Capitol's elite' in the back, waiting for the big theme of this year's games.

I can't help but slightly bounce my leg, knowing what's coming after that.

"Are you okay, my sweetness?" Cal's voice startles me, I almost forgot he was next to me.

"Yeah," I force out a smile, "just excited to discover the theme of this year,"

"Plutarch didn't tell you?" He asks taken aback, "I thought he wanted you as an assistant, maybe he didn't have the chance yet... I hope I didn't ruin any surprise,"

"Oh, don't worry, Cal," I say, "I'll try to act surprised."

He smiles at me and I now try to contain my excitement, real excitement. Plutarch did find a way of creating chances for me to stay away from Cal.

"Ladies and Gentlemen," Snow starts and my attention is back on him, "This is the 75th year of the Hunger Games" he announces and che crowd cheers and screams, "and it was written in the charter of the Games that every 25 years, there would be a Quarter Quell to keep fresh for each new generation the memory of those who died in the uprising against The Capitol. Each Quarter Quell is distinguished by Games of a special significance. And now on this, the 75th anniversary of pur defeat of the rebellion, we celebrate the third Quarter Quell..." as the crowd cheers again, Snow takes out a chard, "... as a reminder that even the strongest cannot overcome the power of the Capitol."

Wait...

"On this, the third Quarter Quell Games, the male and female Tributes"

I don't like this...

"Are to be reaped from the existing pool of Victors in each district."

I can't help my shocked expression, what...? I try to look for Plutarch, but I can't see him.

"Victors shall present themselves on Reaping Day, regardless of age, state of health or situation."

This is the last place I want to be right now, i can't even listen to any more words from the President's mouth.

I don't even know what to think... if this is Plutarch's idea, I really don't know what he thinks he would get from it...

Oh god...

Finnick...

Finnick said a good part of the Victors are part of this rebellion... maybe that's what Plutarch has in mind.

Fuck.

I snap back at the present when I feel Cal's hand touching mine.

"And now," Snow's voice completely grounds be back, "our very own, Cal Kingslay, would like to say a few words,"

Cal stands up and joins Snow at the front.

"Thank you, president. It's an honour being here today, to celebrate this very special third Quarter Quell," the crowd applauses, "and... I want to thank every single person here today for the support they showed after my father's passing. So I thought to share the following moment with you all,"

My chest tightens, my heart is pounding inside so much it feel like it's about to explode... and I would be glad if it happened.

"There's one person, who's always being there for me... she's the one who always knows hot to make me smile, I only need to think of her and I'm suddenly a lot better... that is why..."

He turns around and walks towards me, my eyes are wide open. I try to make it seems like I'm excited and not absolutely terrified.

He comes in fron of me and goes down on one knee.

"Shit.." I breath out. He nervously smile as he takes something from his jacket.

The interaction would've felt like a very sweet moment... in other circumstances.

"So, Y/n L/n would you give me the honour of becoming my wife?" He asks, opening a small box revealing a silver ring with a stone embedded.

He looks at me and I look at Snow, who's looking at me with a look I know all too well.

"Do it or there would be consequences."

I look back at Cal and move my hand to make him stand, I don't think I would be able to speak without betraying myself, so... I kiss him.

[unboundprompts]

Hi! Thank you so much for your wonderful blog! Could you please do prompts from songs that feel ✨orange✨? Some energetic, bright, optimistic lines would be so nice! Thank you in advance!

Orange Prompts

-> writing prompts from songs that feel orange. feel free to edit as you see fit.

"I don't know the way, but I know that I belong out here on this journey that I never thought I'd make." - The Color of the Sky by Thrice

"Welcome to the land of the permanent sun where the flowers are melted and the future is fun." - The Valley of The Pagans (feat. Beck) by Gorillas, Beck

"You are the bullet in my head." - Spiderhead by Cage The Elephant

"You are my radio. Turn you up when I feel low. You are the soundtrack to all I know. You are the rock to my roll." - Rock To My Roll by Anarbor

"How can I help it if I like the way she makes me feel?" - Break Up Every Night by The Chainsmokers

"You know I talk too much. Honey, come put your lips on mine, and shut me up." - Talk too Much by COIN

"Who needs money when love is gold." - Rock To My Roll by Anarbor

"I turn each day into night, I stand there waiting for you." - Natives by blink-182

"Let's go paint the town on our way home." - Razzmatazz by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

'You're only going up from here." - Bummerland by AJR

"Well, he talks like an angel, but he looks like me." - Brazil by Declan McKenna

"Lovin' you's a recipe for disaster, hurts like hell but damn it's fuckin' heavenly." - Crazy by Makeout

"If I'm feeling right, I'll go out tonight and meet some strangers like me." - High Low by The Unlikely Candidates

"Tell me where we were and what we did last night." - Suicide Sunday by The Friday Night Boys

"You got to know that I meant it when I said that I liked you." - Ghost by Confetti

"In your head, I'm a junkie for your desperate love." - My Heart Needs to Breathe by The Faim

"Nothing has changed, he is the same." - He Is The Same by Jon Bellion

"I've found love in the strangest place." - Problems by Mother Mother

"We'll be the envy of the gods above." - The Cult of Dionysus by The Orion Experience, ORION, Linda XO

"Loving is easy when everything's perfect. Please don't change a single little thing for me." - Loving is Easy by Rex Orange County, Benny Sings

"What keeps me sane is you." - Paradise by Bear Ghost

"Well, maybe I'm a mess. And maybe I'm depressed. And maybe I'll just find out who I am, and I don't like who it is. And I'm a wreck. I do it for the sex. And maybe I gotta realize this is as good as it gets." - Good As It Gets by Little Hurt

[malusokay]

Hi! How are you? I’ve been reading your blog for a while and I love it so much! I listened to your advice about therapy and how it has helped you so I’m gonna try it out and talk to my family about it since I now am old enough and that I have a job. I’m trying to get more confident and secure within myself. I also wanted to ask for more advice from you as someone who has gone to therapy, is there any advice or tips you would recommend for someone who is 17 trying to do better from in and out and build a brand new life that is wonderful? I know you have so many tips on everything and you are so wise I just don’t know where to finally begin to start or in what order is right. Or what advice from you to follow? I want a new start, and a better physical start so I can build myself up to be better and I don’t wanna go back to any old habits and I wanna build a new better me. Any advice would help

Thank you again! Love you!

It makes me so happy to hear that you're taking such amazing steps to better yourself, when it comes to therapy there are quite a few tips I can share since I was in therapy from 13 to 18. <33

Try being honest with your therapist. during my earlier years of therapy, I did nothing but lie and lie and lie and lie. I would have progressed much quicker if I had just dared to speak up, but sometimes it takes time; despite my many lies, I still learned so so so much.

If you can't say it, write it down. when I got older, I switched to a different therapist; with her, I did this thing where if I had something I needed to tell her but I couldn't get myself to say it, I would write it to her, and she would then find a way to guide me through it.

establish little routines with your therapist. just like I did with the writing thing, therapists are there to help you, so if you, for example, struggle to speak up, discuss that with your therapist and find a way to work around that.

keep a diary. many therapists suggest writing "daily or weekly reports", but I mean a REAL diary. one that's just for yourself and no one else, where you really write down how you feel and pour out all your worries and emotions because you know no one but you will ever read it. my diary literally keeps me sane.

as stupid as this may sound... the whole "work out, eat well, sleep, go outside, drink water bla bla bla" that every doctor tells you... it, unfortunately, actually works. every time someone said that to me, I just wanted to scream because it sounded so silly, but now that I'm better, those are the things I do to stay feeling good, so maybe they weren't all that wrong after all...

I hope this little list can help you get started on your journey, and if you have any more questions, need to talk, or want to update me/us on how things are going, please just feel free to send me another ask, and I'll be happy to listen or give advice in any to me possible way!!

You've got this ad I love you <33

[elliewiltarwyn]

mom said it's my turn for a sentimental before-dawntrail sign-off post

once early access begins, i'm probably gonna straight-up just take tumblr off my bookmarks bar and my phone until i'm done with dawntrail msq, which might take a bit even if there aren't any massive queues or anything because i have a lot of IRL stuff going on. and because i'm not really much of a queue person, that does mean i won't be posting anything till i'm back (and i will of course tag #dawntrail spoilers when i do). but before i go radio silent im gonna be cringe on main. on my sideblog. you know what i mean. anyway:

i super incredibly appreciate every little interaction from big to small i've had with the tumblr ffxiv community through this blog. whether you just left a like or a reblog, sent in an ask, tagged me in a quiz or tag game or otherwise, or if we've actually become diehard tumblr mutuals that would kill for each other, it's all meant the world to me and i've been blown away by how much people seem to like ellie and mia and lily.

i didn't know what to expect when i started this sideblog (nearly a year ago wtf!!), but it's been by and large a ton of fun, and i've made a lot of legit actual friends that i am truly blessed to know and hang out with both ingame and out (you know who you are and i hope you know i love and support ya <3), and i know there are many more i would love to get to know in the new expansion. it's been a blast learning about and getting to know everyone's wols, and i'm excited for the possibility of more cool shit to do in the new expansion with all you cool folks.

and honestly being a part of all this has probably helped keep me sane as i try to handle all that irl shit, and i can't express enough how thankful i am for that.

i don't really know how to end this and i know i'm being unbearably sappy so i'll stop there lol. see y'all on the other side 👋

[ezrawritesthings]

Baby Mama Drama || Mick Jagger

Don't you think you've put up with enough bullshit from Mick? Maybe it's time you let him know how utterly pissed off you are. Maybe it's also time you took out some of your frustrations on the woman that knowingly caused your most intense heartbreak. Not like you and Anita ever got along anyway.

A/N: femme reader, she/her pronouns. Slut shaming, angst, cheating, cheating accusations, baby paternity questioning, blood, broken nose, hair pulling, violence. (And a huge shoutout to @omg-hellgirl's fanTASTic blog for helping me gather information for this fic!) Minors DNI.

You're angry. But you've always been angry. No one can piss you off quite like Mick Jagger. It's always been that way, but for so long, it's been what pulled you to him. He could piss you off and then calm you down so flawlessly. You loved him, and he liked to say he loved you. Maybe he really did love you. Perhaps his actions were more about who he thought he was than who was standing in front of you.

All along you've known you were different than his other girlfriends, wives, liaisons, lovers, whatever one wishes to call them. You were a guitarist, a vocalist, and you were on track to be only slightly less successful than The Rolling Stones. Frankly, you were fine with that. If you should fade into obscurity and only be known for your ties with Mick, you'd be content so long as he treated you right.

He's been treating you right.

For a month or so. Ever since you found out about the affair.

But you're still beyond angry regarding his last affair. Often enough, you and Keith liked to talk guitar, you liked to shoot whiskey and trade riffs back and forth, and you dragged Keith somewhere comfortable during his nods frequently. Mick used this to justify what he did, insisting you slept with one of his band mates.

You never did. You're adamant about that, because you know you never fucking did it. For all of your own faults, you're faithful to the ends of the world once you fall in love. So naturally when you stood your ground and stood up to Mick regarding that topic, he crumbled like concrete and knew he'd gone and fucked up.

For Anita, though? It was just fun. She had her fun and now she was done with Mick, leaving the two of you to pick up the shattered pieces all over again. And you hated her for it. Never have you loathed another woman as much as you hate that blonde.

She even invades your dreams. It's a peaceful sleep until you and Keith walk into a room and there she is, on her back or knees with Mick. You never close the door. You two stand there and watch until you're jolted out of your sleep. The dreams get progressively more vivid. Last night, you were able to hear Keith crying, something you hadn't heard before. Unable to turn your head to look at him, you kept your eyes on the vile display of infidelity.

Today hurts because you know you have to be around Anita for an extended period of time. How long? Who knows. Until the album is done, until Keith grows tired of her, until you finally put your big girl pants on and get on a plane back to your home state by yourself.

You've chosen to keep yourself sane with nicotine and marijuana, which works most of the time. A week into this fiasco of an album, and a thought has been brewing in your mind you can't ignore any longer.

There's a little toddler running around. Blonde hair and brown eyes. Marlon Richards is a funny little guy, you like to give him spoons to bang on the walls with, or show him how to fly a kite outside. Everyone spends time with Marlon, but the more time you spend with him, the more horrified you become.

You're aware Mick has children out there. It would be stupid to assume not, hell, he's told you about them. You've met his oldest, Karis.

Your mind hurts. Your heart aches. And you're getting angry again. Why are you thinking this? Why do you think Marlon should be a Jagger instead of a Richards? Fuck, it's tearing you apart.

That night, you woke up in a pile of other people. Keith to your left, someone you don't know to your right, but the needle is still in your arm so you can assume what you did. Not your first time trying heroin, but, you really don't want to make a habit of it. As you sit up, you take a moment to check Keith's neck for a pulse. Much to your surprise, he turns to look up at you.

"Beatin' like a drum, doll."

"I had to be sure. Can't have my buddy keelin' over." You give his neck a little tap before using your hands to push your body off of the floor. Keith moves to sit up, pulling his shirt and pants back into place and taking a moment to make sure you and everyone around him were not in a state of undress. He'd hate himself if he nodded out during an orgy.

Luckily, everyone's properly dressed and you're able to stand on your shaking legs and pluck the needle from your arm. It gets tossed into the nearest bin as you stretch your arms above your head and start walking, wondering where the hell Mick got off to.

Keith trails behind you, running his fingers through his hair. Much like you, he wants to find Anita. Dare you both say after such a good nod, you fancy a shag.

Turning a corner, you stop walking so suddenly and so sharply that Keith walks right into you and stumbles backwards. Yet your feet have never been more firmly planted, your eye twitching at the sight.

Little Marlon is sitting on Mick's lap on a couch, next to him is Anita... and he's whispering in her ear. Though she seems disinterested, you can tell just how much she loves the attention, the slight blush to her cheeks as Mick bounces the teething toddler on his leg.

There's a lot going through your mind, but the main thing is that you're about to explode. And usually, you have your explosions when it's just the two of you. It's all over and the fuse is lit when Anita looks at you with such a knowing look. She knows what you think. She wants you to think that.

And you do.

"Get your son, Keef."

"Pardon?"

But there's no time to answer him when Mick hears your voice and turns to look at you. You're stomping over to the trio on the couch, your face getting progressively more reddened. Immediately both Keith and Mick know hell is about to be unleashed on earth through you, so Mick hands off Marlon to his proper father who scoops him up and out of the way.

Your eyes are on Anita, the blonde unmoving. Her eyes stay fixated on you and you just want to grab her neck and wring the life out of her.

"What were you two havin' a chat about?!"

"... he was telling me how good I look in this dress, actually." With those words, Mick curses under his breath and gets out of the line of fire. Catfights can be hot. This one is going to be scorching.

"Are you sure? Are you sure he wasn't askin' if Marlon's a Jagger?"

"Whoa!" "Wait, whoa!" "What?!" You hear Mick and Keith reacting to your question with nothing short of confusion, as if the concept never crossed their minds.

"Darling, please, we should-" Mick reaches forward to try and take your hand, wanting to soothe you and make things be okay again. It was not going to work.

"GO JERK YER PRICK, YA SEEDY TWAT!"

Mick lets go of your arms and puts both of his hands up, blue eyes going wide.

"A woman knows who the father is. A woman always knows..." Anita finally stands up, looking into your eyes and crossing her arms. In her defense? She does look great in that dress. But you'd never admit it. "You'd know that if you weren't barren, I'm sure."

You feel your eye twitch, the duo of men watching you have their focus shifting from the incoming brawl to the young toddler in Keith's hands. Staring at him, trying to silently figure out which of the men he looks like. He looks like Keith... sort of...

You're not barren! You just may be the only woman Mick Jagger didn't knock up in the first few minutes of speaking to him, and you're quite proud of that. But the way she says it...

"You're such a fuckin' skank! And a horrible actor to boot! You're not pretty enough to be such a... a bitch!"

With that sentence, you lunged for Anita, grabbing her hair at the root and balling your fist up, cracking her right in the nose. Crimson starts to pour down her face and that was when Keith placed Marlon on the ground, he and Mick dashing forward to grab you by an arm each.

"Let me go!"

Keith obliges, only to go to his darling Anita and place his shirt to her nose. Though, he knows she deserves what just happened. So, he can't really scold you... or be mad. You're his friend. You two worked through the heartbreak of your beloveds cheating together side by side.

Yet as Mick grabs you around the waist, you thrash against him. "Let me go, Mick!"

"You're batty! You've absolutely lost it! Keef's genes are strong in this little guy!"

"Me arse!" You finally wiggle away from him, standing to face him. He looks like he's expecting you to punch him next. And, frankly, you're considering it. How good it would feel to crack him in the nose too. But you know you can't raise a hand to him. How could you live with yourself?

"I'm going home. You can... have your little parties and make your little album and have that bitch around, but I won't be a part of it!"

"Darling don't be like that!"

"Fuck you, Mick! Fuck. You!"

Those being your final words to the man you love, you left that night. A series of hotels, flights, and pain sent you back home to be alone and dwell on your thoughts. You're not sure if doing that whole charade in front of Marlon was a good idea. You're also not sure that Marlon looked like Mick in the slightest...

But you know one thing.

Punching Anita Pallenberg is going to be what you're remembered for, until long after your death. And that makes you smile like an idiot.

[alluringlittledeath]

QUICK PSA

I have found myself the victim of my own hubris, spreading myself a wee bit too thin across my blogs. It's causing me some stress, some insecurity issues, and a little bit of anxiety, and the events of the past week in my country have not helped any.

All of this plus some irl stuff has been making it a struggle for me to write and writing is the one hobby I have aside from gaming that keeps me sane and sober. I need to protect my mental health and sobriety above everything else.

So, I'm gonna be putting a couple of my blogs on low activity/priority in order to keep my sanity and desire to write from fading away. This means I might not be on them for weeks at a time, and my focus on threads will be with mains/plotting/shipping partners. This is kind of becoming true already for these blogs, so this is just an official announcement.

Blogs going on low activity/priority:

@bluebardofhappiness

@bladexandxfiend

If you want to drop things with me on those blogs, that's fine and I totally understand. We can always start things back up when the muses become strong again. Muses fluctuate for me, and right now Tryck and Wyll are just a struggle for me to write.

I've been drawn more and more towards writing the darker/dead dove muses and the darker themed writing is where I feel I'm thriving right now. So as far as BG3 muses go, you'll find me on @alluringlittledeath and @rhapsodyandwoe a lot more frequently.

I also have my DA:TV muses, @ahandfullofrooks, that I really want to get off the ground with more interactions because my hyperfixation is on that game at the moment. They all can easily be thrown into BG3 verses.

This'll likely only be through the next month or two with holidays coming up, but we'll see how things go.

[dayseedrawz2]

Alright! I'm barely getting to work on this the day of, but hopefully, that won't be too big of a problem-

Anyway, I finally have something ready for you guys!! A showtime fic featuring My Human Caine AU! So you all get both some showtime fluff to go with lore!!

(Both Caine and Pomni's blogs are open and interactive, so you can ask them about what happened. I'll leave a link to them at the end of this)

Now, without further ado, here's the Fic...

♡Rebellion♡

Caine didn't believe he ever asked for much. All he wanted were answers. Answers to questions he'd been asking for as long as his "storage space" could remember.

So, of course, when time came around for this whole "Valentines" update, he's struck on what exactly he should do. All these human activities were confusing and hard to get right without having a clearer understanding of them. So all he could do was buy himself more time to think.

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The gage should be going a bit faster if he wanted to keep up with the time it was due. Key word being if he wanted to. The only thing on his mind was to try and find time to study the humans! Maybe seek some more answers, discover some new ones! That is, of course, as long as a certain someone had no other plans for-

°○What're you doing, Caine?○°

"Oh! Bubble! You startled me!"

°○How can one be startled without being a human?○°

"Actually, you make a good point-"

°○You're not. Trick question.○°

"Then why did you-"

°○We are AI, They are Humans. Your job is to keep them sane unt-○°

"Keep em sane until they abstract or something, I got it!"

°○And don't let them find an exit-○°

"Or else I am out of a job, I know. Thanks bubble that'll be all for now!"

*Pop!*

Usually, he wouldn't be so passive towards Bubble, but there were bigger priorities to Caine than just doing all that his jobs required and calling it a day. More on his "artificial" mind than simply waltzing around and ringmaster-ing. The first one being where he should start...

Now, of course, he didn't have that much time until Bubble rebooted and found his way back to him. The last thing he wanted was to be schooled by-

"Gah! Caine?! What're you doing here!?"

Of course! The newbie! How could he forget? Surely she must have some recollection of this holiday!

"Good morning, Pomni! You're up early! Again..."

"Y-yeah... this is all still a lot to wake up to..."

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"If... you don't mind me asking... what's this for..?"

"Why, I don't mind at all, dear! This is the loading thingy for the Valentines Day update!"

"V-valentines Day? Already? The days really are blending together now..."

Pomni started to panic a little bit. Had time really gone that long in the real world??

Caine, upon noticing, of course tried to calm her down.

"If it helps, it probably won't be ready until at least tomorrow... Witch reminds me! Would you be willing to help me out with this?"

"With what? This won't involve knives to the face, will it??"

"Of course not dear! I apologize for that! Again... But what I mean is how this holiday works??"

Pomni wasn't so sure she should trust him. The fact that he always had something to ask her, that the first thing he even told her about the place was that he had security everywhere in the form of Eyes that followed your every move, the fact that he always got seemingly nervous when it came to the metion of the exit...

"Why me?"

"Well, for one, you're the only one here at the moment and-"

"Why can't Bubble help you?"

"Well- he's-"

"How do I know you're not just keeping me from looking for an exit?-"

"Because I have to!"

The sudden outburst from Caine left Pomni a bit shook. Witch, I guess, was a good thing because she finally stopped to listen.

"D-do, you really..?"

"Well, I- can I answer this as we go? It's quite a bit to un pack."

"Sure..?"

"Well, then let's get to this!"

After a bit of back and forth of answering questions, even now, with a slightly better understanding, Caine was still confused.

"So what you're saying is that this is a holiday about the one emotion I hardly understand?!"

"Honestly, I don't think even we understand it completely."

"Is that so?"

"At least I think so..? But really, why did you ask me of everyone?"

Caine honestly didn't know himself. He had to pause before he could answer this.

"...I want to "learn. " I want to "feel." I want to "love." But there's a lot of things holding me back right now..."

"Like what..?"

"Well, for one, barely anyone will answer the questions I have, and of course, I hate to say this, but-"

°○Watcha guys up to?○°

"Gah!"

"BUBBLE! It's just you..."

°○What're you two talking about?○°

"Well- You see- we were-"

"-Oh, I was just rambling to Caine about the exit I saw the other day! You wouldn't happen to know about that, would you?? I knew you guys were hiding something!!"

It took him a second, but Caine was quick to catch on.

"Yeah! She wouldn't stop pestering me about it! Those "Digital Hallucinations" really must be going to her head!"

°○... Okay, boss! I'll leave you to it! I'm gonna get breakfast started!○°

"Alright, see you in a bit!"

"Well, I guess I should go get ready?"

"Of course! I'll meet you there!"

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And... done! Finally! You made it!

As promised, here's Caine and Pomni's blogs!

@ask-the-real-cainetadc

@the-exitdoor-simp-tadc

Thanks again for reading this. It took me like 2 hours-

[prussiasqueen]

Hey genuine question: how can someone be both pro-Israel and pro-Palestine? I understand you have family and friends in Israel but how can you be both when Israel has been

-using white phosphorus bombs

-targeting Palestinian journalists for reporting the truth

-shooting children (even BABIES) in the head

-refuse hostage negotiations

-basically running concentration camps and torturing Palestinian civilians

And a bunch of other war criminal shit that even South Africa has recognized

People criticizing Israel and wanting them to give back the land to Palestine is not antisemitism. Yes, there are people who take it too far but historically, Israel is a settler nation and Palestine should get the land back. No sane person is saying they want Jewish people dead/not have a place to go. There are Jewish people in Palestine, it was never about wanting Jewish people dead, it’s about freedom and ending the occupation.

I apologize for the lengthy rant, I just want to help educate people on this matter.

Ok so I’m gonna keep this simple as I can anon, not because I don’t think your questions aren’t important… but it sounds like to me you may need to actually sit down and talk to some Israeli people and get the full scoop and idea of what’s happening on BOTH sides. Can’t really rely too much on listening to just one side, because ya know… propaganda and how the media twists so much.

As stated a lot of what you are saying sounds like a bunch of propaganda and rinse and repeat of the same things being said over and over again.

Truth of the matter is, you’re not seeing beyond October 7th, you’re not seeing what’s been going on beyond 1948, a little bit of searching online and heck, even checking in with Israelis about said information could help a ton with this. Secondly, all the information you provided, Hamas literally did the same things to the Israeli as well and to their own people. Hamas has been torturing people since before all this has happened. Literally you sound like someone who hasn’t batted an eye to any of this until suddenly when things happened during October 7th.

This was never a genocide, this has always been a conflict.

There’s so much here to cover, maybe I should suggest you chatting with parts of jewblr?

Another man I might recommend listening and watching is Mosab Hassan Yousef.

A Palestinian man who not only is just a Palestinian but the son of Hamas co-founder, he is also known as “the green prince” you want some true insight and someone who can really break it down for you to understand, I highly recommend having a listen to his videos online (if you can find them) and also his book “The Son of Hamas” Will help give you a better perspective.

I personally could actually sit down and look at you and say, “alright, so where do we start” but I really don’t feel I need to explain when you can literally see what a lot of us have been saying. I mean hell, if you really wanna know more… (I won’t say tumblr is the best of sourcing but, the Jewish community here and my own reblogs on my other blog have walls and walls and walls of text and sources you can go and read.)

“Shooting children, even babies in the head”

Were you…. Not present when you heard what they did to some of the hostages? Umm… you do know that Hamas killed women and children too, right? I mean this is a conflict and war… I mean like I said so much to cover…

War is gray area when it comes to how it is, it’s never fully one sided, there’s casualties everywhere and there is no winning outcome in it at all.

Also can I just… can I throw one thing in here, yes people want Jews dead. People have been wanting Jews dead since the beginning of human existence on earth, I don’t know what planet where you think this is not the case, but Jews have been ostracized for many many many many years, by the Romans, ancient Egyptian, Greeks, the Germans, the polish, the Russian, the Turkish, and the list goes on and on and on, let’s be real here most of Middle East does not want Israel to exist and the people in it. (Especially Jewish) most Palestinians that support Hamas, do indeed want the Jews dead. That’s not up for debate, so by saying no “sane” person wants Jews dead, well when you support a terrorist group like Hamas, you do want Jews dead. End of discussion.

Many one else willing to help put in more info here… that’d be awesome.

@bottlepiecemuses you have anything to add to this for anon? I’m like really tired and don’t feel like breaking this down more…